#besides it's all water under the bridge

[fengqings-pnutbu-er]

Hua Cheng was wrong for holding a grudge against Mu Qing for eight hundred years. Fight the floorboards.

[rayhalloffame]

Insomnia

Carmen Berzatto x F!Reader

Not to jump right into filth with carmy but I can’t stop thinking about having to ride him until he’s so tired he has to sleep, like insomnia doesn’t hold a candle to you. This got away from me so fast. Anyway, NSFW below the cut, MDNI

You wake up to the sound of a dish clattering. The clock reads 2:38 when you look to the bedside table. The room is cold and dark save for the light from beneath the bedroom door. Carmen should’ve been in bed beside you, but all signs point to it being a tough night. You rub the sleep from your eyes and swing your legs over the side of the bed. Goosebumps raise on your bare thighs almost immediately. The throw blanket at the end of the bed is easy enough to wrap around your shoulders before you go to find Carmy.

The TV is flickering but muted when you pass through the livingroom. A shuffle down the hall and right turn brings you to the kitchen where you find Carmen, back to you and head down in front of the running faucet. He feels you before he sees you, hissing at the chill on your hands that find home beneath his shirt, fists balled around the blanket and pressed to his navel. You rest your chin on his shoulder, cock your neck to look at his face. “Hey, Bear,” you murmur, press a kiss to the curve of his jaw.

Carmen sighs, removes the hand that was pinching the bridge of his nose to rub along your forearm. It’s then that you notice his other hand that he’s holding under the flow of cold water. “Burn yourself?”

As if he forgot himself, he flicks the wetness from his fingers then shuts the water. “Was trying to clean up before bed. Didn’t think the pan would still be so fuckin’ hot.” He dries his hand on the towel that sits in the counter. You press a final kiss to the back of his shoulder before releasing him from your hold, stepping back so he has space to turn around. “Sorry for wakin’ you, baby.” He pulls you into his chest by your shoulders, rubs his hands down your back to deliver some warmth through the blanket.

“It’s late,” you tell him, as if he doesn’t know, and his sigh is enough to solidify that fact. Before he can apologize, you continue. “What’d you make?” You extract yourself to peak into the glass Tupperware on the small island. “Smells yummy.”

You hear him open a drawer and utensils clinking. He pops the top off of a container, sticks the fork inside and twirls. Carmy feeds you, hand held just under your chin to catch any crumbs. He flushes when you groan around the bite. “Ma’s lemon chicken,” he answers. “Want more?”

He’s already reaching back to the container with the fork but you stop him. “It’s late,” you remind him around a swallow. He nods, closes the Tupperware and stores it in the fridge. “We’ll get the dishes tomorrow.” Carm’s hand hovers over the faucet handle before he relents, turns and nods at you. He follows you out of the kitchen, stopping in the living room.

“I’m uh, not too tired yet so uh-,” he jerks his head towards the couch, “gonna just watch tv for a bit. I’ll come to bed soon, yeah?” He’s waiting for you to fight him, tell him he has to sleep, to take care of himself. He’s surprised when you just nod, grabbing his hand to guide him to the couch. Carmen lays back, making space between his legs for you. Your body melts into his, head resting in his neck and throw blanket covering the both of you. You try to wait him out, listening for deeper drawn out breaths that indicate his slumber, but your own tiredness wins.

An hour later you’re awake again. Carmy’s hand is dragging lazily up and down the length of your spine beneath the t-shirt of his you often wear to sleep. “Mm, Bear, still awake?” Your voice is hoarse with sleep.

Carmen looks down his nose at you, hums and it vibrates through his chest. “You can go to bed,” he whispers, “just have a lot on my mind tonight.”

You shake your head, drawing in a deep breath before shuffling up his body. “What can I do?” you ask in earnest, nose tracing slowly against his cheek.

The “Nothin’, baby” that he sighs is expected. You adjust your position, knees sinking into either side of his hips. You drag your nose along the bridge of his, then seal your lips in a slow and tender kiss. His hand flexes on your back. “What’s that for?” he asks. You don’t answer, instead map the inside of his mouth with your tongue. He groans into your mouth minutes later, probes you again.

“Just think about me,” you whisper, dragging your lips across his cheek and to his ear. Your hips roll down into his, a moan ripping through Carmen’s chest.

“Always thinkin’ bout you,” he responds. His large hands find your hips and squeeze. You push down on his shoulders, sitting up in his lap when he tries to flip you under him.

“Let me ease your mind,” you plead. You pull your shirt over your head to reveal your bare chest and the light lacey panties that sit prettily on your waist. He rubs his hand over them, his tattoos a stark contrast to the daintiness.

Carmen’s eyes meet yours. “Yeah,” he says dumbly, breathless, “alright, yeah.” You make quick work of getting his sweats and briefs pulled down enough to reveal his angry red cock that feels so hard it might actually be painful. You’re distracted by it, tracing your fingers up his length delicately, saliva building in your mouth. You lean down to taste him, sucking just the tip behind your lips. Carmen huffs, hand finding your cheek. He begs, something about not teasing him, so you settle yourself back on his hips. Carmy uses his thumb to pull your panties to the side, catching just briefly on your clit, making you gasp. He smirks up at you but says nothing, instead, jaw falling open when he watches you sink down onto him. Slow, like you have to adjust to his size every time he gets inside you, which is partly true.

Hands planted on his chest, you grind against him. Carm’s thumb rubs delicious circles into your throbbing clit. You scratch your nails across his nipples, tummy flipping at the punched out moan it gets from Carmen. You trace his features, look at him adoringly. “You’re so- nghh,” you stutter, finding an angle that has him driving into the spongey spot in your cunt, “beautiful,” you get out in a breathy moan.

Carmen chuckles, squeezing your thigh with the hand not abusing your clit. He feels the way the muscles work under his palm, makes him even more aware of how hard you’re working to please him, to make him feel good. You drive him crazy.

He brings that calloused hand up to rest on your ribs, rubbing the skin just under your bouncing tit, knows how it soothes you, reminds you to calm your thumping heart. “Easy,” he says. You slow your hips to catch your breath. Carmen nods at you, in encouragement or appreciation you can’t tell. He lets his hand wander up further, until he’s gripping the back of your head and forcing you down to his chest. He holds your face mere centimeters from his own, lips brushing each others’ while you pant. Carmen plants his feet on the couch and starts thrusting his hips harshly into yours. You mewl into his mouth. Your hand wraps around his wrist and squeezes, crease deepening between your brows as pleasure builds in your belly. “I love you, you know?” He’s talking to you between pants, kissing your slack mouth.

“Uh-huh,” you whine, “love you, love you.” Carmen burries himself in you, holds your hips down with his forearm across your lower back. He has you pressed as close to him as possible without physically crawling into your skin. “Cum, Carmy, please – fuck, please.” That’s all it takes. He crushes your head into his shoulder, moans into your ear like a wounded animal, like you’re taking everything from him. Or like he’s giving you everything.

And he’s so sensitive but you’re so close, can tell by the way you’re squeezing your velvety walls around him. He picks up the pace. “C’mon, pretty girl, you’re right there, yeah?” He’s murmuring in your ear. With a final harsh push of his hips into yours you’re soaking his dick. He pets a hand down the back of your head, soft, tender, keeps rocking into you slowly while you ride it out. “Atta girl,” he murmurs into the skin of your temple, pressing his lips there.

Carmy’s spent, and you are, too, if the way your body goes limp against him is anything to go by. You both end up dozing right where you are, only moving to the bedroom when you slip off of him because your hip starts to cramp. He sleeps through his alarm in the morning.

[n0vazsq]

Forever mine? Forever yours | CL16 x Reader

pairing . . . charles leclerc x gf!reader

summary . . . When you and Charles have a fight, you want nothing more than his forgiveness

request . . . no!

word count . . . 884

warnings . . . just a bit of angst that turns into fluff!

faceclaim . . . N/A

alexavia yaps . . . was listenting to like love // break up songs while writing this and legit wanted to cry like kms

. . . The streets of Monaco were unusually quiet that night, the hum of distant cars replaced by the echo of footsteps against cobblestone. The city lights cast long shadows, stretching like ghosts between the narrow alleys.

Charles walked ahead of you, hands stuffed deep in his pockets, shoulders tense. The silence between you was heavy, filled with the reminders of words you hadn’t meant to say, things you both couldn’t take back.

The fight had started small, like it always did. You had only asked about the upcoming race, about his late nights at the simulator, about why he was pushing so hard. It had spiraled from there. Frustration simmering just beneath the surface, boiling over into harsh words and defensive silence.

Now, you followed a few steps behind, heart heavy, each breath tight in your chest. You wanted to reach out, to bridge the gap between you, but the distance felt overwhelming. Charles had always been intense, carrying the weight of expectations like a second skin. But tonight, he seemed…fragile, like a wire stretched too thin.

He stopped suddenly by the marina, the dark water stretching endlessly before you. The wind carried the scent of salt, cool against your skin. He didn’t turn around, didn’t say anything at first. Just stood there, staring out at the horizon, hands clenched at his sides.

"You think I don’t care enough?" His voice was quiet, but the tone is his voice was unmistakable.

Your eyes stung. "Charles, no. That’s not what I meant." You took a step closer, but the space between you felt like a chasm. "I worry. You push yourself so hard, and I-"

He turned then, eyes meeting yours, frustration and something deeper swirling in their depths. "Do you know what it’s like?" His voice cracked, raw and tense. "To carry all of this? The pressure, the expectations…? Every single day, everyone looking at me, waiting for me to either win or fail." He shook his head. "And then I come home, and it feels like I’m failing here too."

The words hit you like a stab to the heart, and they probably were a stab to the heart. "Charles…" Your voice was barely a whisper. "I didn’t mean to add to it. I just… I see you carrying all of this, and it scares me. I don’t want you to break."

He looked away, jaw tight. "I’m already breaking." The statement was soft, almost lost to the wind. "I wake up thinking about the next race. I go to sleep replaying every mistake I made. And I know people are waiting for me to slip, to prove that I’m not good enough." His eyes found yours again, and there was a vulnerability there that made your heart ache."I’m afraid too. Afraid of letting everyone down. Afraid of losing… you. All because of my stupid mistakes."

Tears pricked at the corners of your eyes. You closed the distance between you, reaching for his hand. He let you, fingers cold but steady. "You’re never losing me,” you said, voice firm despite the emotion threatening to choke you. "I’m here. I’ll always be here."

He looked down, chuckling emotionlessly, thumb brushing over your knuckles. "Sometimes, it feels like I can’t breathe. Like I’m drowning under it all."

You squeezed his hand, stepping closer until your chest touched his. "You don’t have to carry it alone. I know I can’t take the weight off your shoulders, but I can stand beside you. I can remind you that you’re more than the races, more than the wins or losses."

He closed his eyes, taking a shaky breath. When he opened them again, the anger had softened, replaced by something raw and unspoken. "I’m sorry. I know I shut you out sometimes. It’s not fair to you."

You shook your head. "You don’t have to apologize for being human. I just… I want you to let me in. Let me help."

He reached up, cupping your face in his hands. His touch was gentle, a stark contrast to the tension that had been there moments ago. "I don’t deserve you," he whispered, voice barely audible.

You smiled, tears slipping down your cheeks. "You deserve everything, Charles, my angel. And I’ll remind you of that every day if I have to."

He leaned his forehead against yours, the distance between you finally gone. For a long moment, neither of you spoke. The world around you faded away; the distant hum of the city, the gentle lapping of the waves. There was only this. Only him. Only Charles.

"Forever mine?" he whispered, his voice barely above a breath.

You pulled back just enough to look into his eyes, your heart swelling. "Forever yours."

He held you like you were the only thing keeping him grounded, his grip tight, almost desperate. The walls he had built around himself were still there, but for now, they had cracks, just enough to let you in.

As the wind carried the scent of salt and the promise of better days, you knew that this was how it would be. There would be fights, and fears, and moments where everything felt like it was falling apart. But there would also be this: quiet moments in the dark, where love felt like the strongest thing in the world.

[loveesiren]

What about jj saving rafes gf instead of Sarah when she falls off the boat? Even though jj and Rafe hate each other

of course babes! sorry this took a while, i hope you enjoy! :)

𝕆𝕧𝕖𝕣𝕓𝕠𝕒𝕣𝕕

warnings: not proofread, language, slight angst

wc: 2.4k+

Before you were Rafe Cameron’s girl, you were a Pogue through and through. You grew up with JJ and John B, learning to boat, fish, and work hard for the things you wanted. Life was simple but full, with endless summer days spent on the water and nights filled with laughter. When Pope and Kiara joined your crew, it felt like your family was complete—especially since having Kiara around meant you finally had someone who understood what it was like to be a girl surrounded by all that chaotic, masculine energy.

But things changed when you caught the attention of Rafe Cameron. At first, it seemed impossible. A Kook and a Pogue? The idea alone was laughable. Yet, against all odds, there was something magnetic about Rafe—a spark you couldn’t ignore. And to your surprise, he felt it too. It wasn’t long before stolen glances turned into secret meetings, and those meetings turned into something deeper. But every step closer to Rafe felt like a step away from your childhood friends.

Sure, it was fine when John B started dating Sarah Cameron. But when you got with the older Cameron sibling, it was a problem. Rafe’s constant harassment didn’t help your case. Sarah was much kinder than her brother, and the Pogues saw her as someone who genuinely cared for John B. Rafe, on the other hand, had a reputation that preceded him—a volatile temper and a knack for trouble that made him nearly impossible to trust. Except when it came to you. Your presence seemed to calm the storm in his mind.

Choosing Rafe wasn’t easy. It wasn’t that you stopped caring for the Pogues. In fact, you still loved them fiercely, even if your paths had diverged. Being with Rafe meant walking a tightrope. While he harbored a burning hatred for your old crew, he knew better than to act on it—because hurting them meant risking you. And losing you was unthinkable for Rafe, who had grown to see you as the one thing anchoring him in his stormy world. But even his restraint couldn’t erase the tension. The Pogues saw your relationship as a betrayal, and you feared they’d never forgive you. 

Now, you sat alone on the edge of a boat, staring out at the vast expanse of the Atlantic as it stretched endlessly before you. The journey to Morocco wasn’t one you’d ever imagined taking. But here you were, caught between two worlds, trying desperately to keep the peace. It was your idea to bring Rafe and the Pogues together for this mission. You’d convinced Rafe to help them track down Groff, who had made off with his money, knowing it could also give JJ and Pope a chance to evade capture. Even if you weren’t close anymore, you couldn’t bear to see the people you once called family thrown behind bars.

But, as expected, not everything had gone to plan.

The Pogues didn’t trust Rafe—and for good reason. His track record spoke for itself. As soon as they got him on the boat, they tied him up in the tiny bathroom, keeping him under lock and key. You understood their logic, but that didn’t make it any easier to see your boyfriend treated like a prisoner. Worse still, they’d forbidden you from seeing him until you reached Morocco. You didn’t fight them on it. Confrontation had never been your strong suit, and besides, you knew better than to argue with JJ when his mind was made up.

So, you sat in silence, listening to the rhythmic crash of waves against the hull, the salty breeze brushing against your face. The solitude of the sea was both comforting and suffocating. It gave you time to think—about the choices you’d made, the people you’d hurt, and the fragile balance you were struggling to maintain. You wanted to believe this trip could be a turning point, a chance to bridge the gap between Rafe and the Pogues. But deep down, you knew the odds were slim. Trust was hard to rebuild, and the wounds on both sides ran deep.

As the sun dipped lower on the horizon, painting the sky in hues of orange and pink, you let out a weary sigh. All you could do now was wait—for land, for answers, for the moment when everything would inevitably come to a head. Until then, the sea was your only companion, its endless expanse reflecting the tangled mess of your heart.

-

Sarah was kind. She always had been. Even after all her brother had put her through, she still cared for him enough to make sure he was fed and hydrated. She did the same for you.

“Brought you some dinner,” she said, plopping down beside you.

“Thanks,” you responded softly. You took a few bites of the sandwich she brought you before putting it aside. Your appetite had been wearing thin the entire trip.

“I think it’s stupid too,” she said, looking out at the horizon while the late sun cast bright ripples on the calm water.

“What do you mean?” you asked.

She shrugged her shoulders. “The whole Kook versus Pogue thing. Rafe’s done his fair share of bad shit, but haven’t we all? I really think he wants to help this time.”

“He does,” you said. “All he wants is to get his money back from Groff. He doesn’t care about the crown. Honest.”

“I know,” she said, offering you a soft smile. “We’ll be there soon. Try to rest.”

You pondered her words as she walked off. You weren’t overly close with Sarah. It was almost as if you and she had swapped lives. You started seeing Rafe around the same time Sarah and John B got together, and for the last three years, she’d been getting a taste of life’s adventures while you enjoyed the finer things. You loved Rafe. You were in love with him. You couldn’t imagine being without him. But you often found yourself missing the life you once lived with the Pogues.

You cringed as you swallowed one final shot of whiskey, a vice that did close to nothing to take the stress away. You tossed the bottle to the side and rolled over, closing your eyes and trying your best to relax to the soothing sounds of the ocean. Eventually, you were lulled to sleep, dreaming of Rafe. He smiled as he took you into his large arms, and you felt secure in his warm embrace.

The dream was short-lived, though, as you were thrown roughly against the hard wall of the boat. Disoriented, you struggled to find something to grip. Rain lashed against your face as the boat pitched violently from side to side.

You made your way to your feet and took in your surroundings. The storm had hit fast. You could see movement inside the helm as the Pogues scrambled to navigate the chaos and secure the boat.

“Rafe,” you whispered, your breath hitching. “Rafe!” your voice rose into a frantic scream as you stumbled toward the helm. You knew you had to find him—if he was left unsecured, he’d drown.

“Y/N, get inside!” JJ’s voice cut through the storm. You turned to see him and John B holding the door open, JJ’s hand extended toward you. You reached for him, but another violent wave threw you to the deck.

“Where’s Rafe?!” you yelled, coughing as salty seawater stung your throat.

“Kiara’s getting him!” John B shouted back.

Moments later, Rafe appeared in the doorway, drenched but alive. “Y/N!”

Relief flooded through you at the sight of him, but your joy was short-lived. A massive wave loomed on the horizon, crashing into the boat with terrifying force. You screamed as the water dragged you off the stern, the world disappearing into a churning abyss.

“Y/N!” JJ and Rafe shouted in unison.

“Rafe!” you screamed, fighting to keep your head above water. The sea clawed at you, threatening to pull you under. “Rafe! Help!”

“I’m coming, Y/N!” JJ’s voice rang out as he dove into the water after you.

“JJ, what are you doing?!” John B yelled, trying to hold Rafe back from following. “JJ, no, no, no!”

But it was too late. JJ had already disappeared beneath the waves.

“Y/N!” Rafe’s scream was raw with desperation, tears streaming down his face. John B had never seen him so unhinged, so consumed by fear.

John B pressed his hand firmly against Rafe’s chest, forcing him back inside. “Come on, man! We can’t help them if we drown too!” he yelled over the howling wind. He shoved Rafe into the cabin and slammed the door shut.

“No, no, no, no, no!” Rafe sobbed, pounding his fists against the wall. “I have to go help her! I have to find her, man!”

“Rafe!” Sarah’s voice cut through the chaos as she wrapped her arms around him. “Rafe, it’s okay! Let’s just get to land. I’m sure they’ll find their way back!” She rubbed his back as he crumpled, his sobs echoing through the small cabin.

-

The water finally calmed as you and JJ struggled onto the sand, every muscle in your body screaming with exhaustion. The cold night air bit at your skin, but the relief of solid ground beneath you was overwhelming. Collapsing onto the beach, you coughed violently, lungs burning as you fought to catch your breath.

“Are you okay?” JJ asked, his voice ragged between gasps for air.

You nodded weakly, words feeling like too much effort. After a moment, you managed to rasp, “A-Are you?”

“Yeah,” he breathed, his voice barely above a whisper.

Minutes passed as you both sat in silence, trying to steady your breathing. The ocean stretched out before you, dark and infinite, illuminated only by a pale sliver of moonlight. A single tear slid down your cheek as your thoughts turned to Rafe—his face, his voice, and the uncertainty of whether you’d ever see him again.

“They’ll be okay, Y/N,” JJ said softly, his tone more reassuring than he probably felt. “At first light, we’ll head down the beach. We’ll find them.”

You nodded, swallowing back another wave of emotion. “Hey, Jayj?” Your voice was barely audible.

“Yeah?”

“Thank you,” you murmured, gratitude lacing every syllable.

He turned to you with a tired but genuine smile. “Can’t kill a Pogue, right?”

The next thing you knew, the sun was warming your skin, its gentle rays coaxing you back to consciousness. The once-violent sea was calm now, its rhythmic waves bringing an unexpected peace. You stretched, muscles stiff and aching, before glancing toward the shore.

JJ was standing near the water, absentmindedly dragging his foot through the sand. You rose to your feet, brushing off grains of sand stuck to your damp clothes, and made your way over to him.

“Hey,” you greeted softly.

He turned, offering you a small smile. “Hey. Sleep okay?”

“Guess so,” you chuckled. “Didn’t even realize I passed out.”

“Not surprising,” JJ said with a shrug. “You were pretty wrecked.” His tone was light, but concern lingered in his eyes. “I was thinking we head up the beach toward where the boat was headed. If they made it to land, that’s where we’ll find them.”

You winced at the word if, the uncertainty slicing through your chest like a blade. “Okay,” you replied firmly. “Let’s go.”

For the next 45 minutes, the two of you trudged along the beach in silence, your shared determination a quiet bond. Every step brought a mix of hope and dread as you scanned the horizon for any sign of your loved ones.

“You know,” JJ said suddenly, breaking the silence, “they’re probably feeling the same as us—like they might never see us again.”

You shook your head, gripping tightly onto hope. “We’ll find them, Jayj. We have to.”

“Yeah,” he said, his voice soft but resolute. “We will.”

A few more minutes passed before you gathered the courage to speak again. “JJ?”

He glanced at you, his brow furrowing slightly.

“Do… Do you hate me?” The question felt heavy on your tongue, dredging up years of unspoken tension.

JJ’s expression shifted, a flicker of pain crossing his features. He sighed, raking a hand through his damp hair. “No, Y/N. I don’t hate you. I don’t think I could hate you even if I wanted to.”

His words caught you off guard, and you looked down, fiddling with your hands. “It just… it felt like you did.”

JJ’s voice softened as he continued. “I was hurt. You were my best friend, and when you and Rafe got together, it felt like he stole you away. From me. From all of us.”

A tear slid down your cheek, and you quickly wiped it away. “I’m sorry, Jayj. I never wanted to hurt you.”

“You don’t need to apologize,” he said firmly. “All you’ve ever done was try to keep the peace. I should’ve seen that sooner. And last night, when you fell off the boat…” His voice wavered, and he looked away. “All I could think about was how I couldn’t let you die thinking I hated you. You’re my sister, Y/N. You always will be.”

Tears blurred your vision as you stepped forward, wrapping your arms around him. JJ hugged you back tightly, resting his chin on your head.

“I love you, Jayj. I’ve missed you so much,” you whispered.

He pulled back, his hands on your shoulders. “We’re gonna fix this. All of it. I’ll even make an effort with Rafe if it means getting you back.”

An hour later, the sun was high in the sky when you spotted movement in the distance.

“J, is that them?” you asked breathlessly, shielding your eyes with your hand.

JJ squinted at the figures. “Let’s find out,” he said, quickening his pace.

As you got closer, the shapes grew clearer: Sarah’s golden hair, Kiara’s familiar stance, and Rafe’s unmistakable silhouette towering above the group.

“Rafe!” you cried, breaking into a run.

He turned at the sound of your voice, his eyes widening before he sprinted toward you. The moment he reached you, his arms wrapped around you, lifting you off the ground.

“Oh my God,” he murmured, his voice breaking as he buried his face in your neck. “I thought I lost you. I thought I’d never see you again!” He cried.

“I’m here,” you whispered, tears streaming down your face. “I’m safe. JJ saved me.”

When Rafe finally pulled back, his gaze shifted to JJ, who stood a few feet away, watching the reunion. Without hesitation, Rafe approached him and pulled him into a hug.

“Thank you,” Rafe said, his voice thick with emotion.

JJ stiffened for a moment, then relaxed, clapping Rafe on the back. “Yeah, well… couldn’t let her die on my watch,” he said with a crooked smile.

As you stood there, watching the two men who meant so much to you, hope swelled in your chest. For the first time in years, you felt like things might finally be okay.

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[dilemmaontwolegs]

Angel || LN4

Summary: Kingsday gets a little wild, in honour of Lando’s nose. Warnings: alcohol, injuries, blood WC: 1.7k

Lando wasn’t drunk, but he was by no means sober either. Everyone had warned him the Kingsday event was a marathon not a sprint so he was taking it slow, sipping his rum and coke out of the orange paper cup while the river boat cruised its course.

By midafternoon it was another story completely.

Martin had taken a break and let a playlist continue the party without him on the deck while he went in search of Lando. The British driver had reached the point of being tipsy and fallen into a state of drunkenness where he could no longer block out his intrusive thoughts. Everywhere he looked couples were dancing or making out and he couldn’t help the despair of loneliness that separated him from the fun.

Leaning back on the cushions that covered the bow, Lando looked up to the bright blue sky and wondered why he couldn’t find someone that loved him with the same passion he had. He was always the one to fall harder and knew it was why things didn’t work out long-term.

The half empty cup was stolen from his hand and Lando lolled his head to see Martin drinking it dry. “No more for you, my friend. Smile! It’s Kingsday: the sun is out and the music is loud.”

“Sorry,” Lando sighed, not quite able to muster up a real smile.

“What’s wrong?” Martin dropped onto a cushion beside him and nudged his shoulder until Lando spilled the thoughts he was harbouring.

—

“These heels are killing me,” you complained as they wobbled on the cobblestone. “Can we stop for a minute?”

There were groans from some of the guys in the group but their girlfriends silenced them. You smiled gratefully at your friends but knew they were in just as much pain after hours of drinking in the city for Kingsday. The thought of walking any further to the house party someone had invited everyone to nearly had you calling for a taxi, despite the chances of getting one next to nothing.

“Lennon said there will be tons of single guys at the party. In that dress you will totally pull a 10,” Sarah said as she leaned back against the bridge rail and rolled each ankle to ease the ache.

You laughed at the statement and mirrored her position, careful not to drop the glass you had accidentally stolen from the last bar. “Getting laid isn’t the problem, it’s getting the guy to stick around afterwards.”

“Relationships are overrated,” she said, blowing a kiss to Lennon when he looked her way and raised a brow. “Not ours, baby.”

You sighed longingly as they shared a smile. “I want what you guys have.”

“Well then you better hurry up because the love of your life might just be waiting for you. Wouldn’t want to miss that, would you?”

You rolled your eyes but decided that you would continue the walk barefoot and put your heels back on when you got to the house. Leaning against the rail, you balanced on one foot and reached for your heel just as a drunkard went flying past on his e-bike.

“Ah, shit!” you screamed as you lost your balance, toppling back over the rail and straight towards the murky water below.

—

Martin yawned as he listened to Lando’s long winded explanation for why he was alone and all his friends were in relationships.

“Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t realise I was putting you to sleep,” he sassed.

“Well if you want some advice, from someone in a relationship, you’re not helping yourself moping around. For starters, you need to get up,” Martin encouraged as he rose to his feet and offered his friend a hand before the sunlight disappeared, the boat passing under one of the many bridges. “Love isn’t going to just fall into your lap-”

A scream pierced the air before a flurry of orange material crashed onto Lando, both their eyes squinting to readjust to the bright sunlight out of the tunnel.

Your heart hammered in your chest as you realised you were still alive and you looked around to see what had broken your fall. “Holy shit, I am so sorry!”

A stunned man sat beneath you and you reached for his face as you noticed the blood running down his nose. “Oh my god, did I do that? Are you alright? Shit, you probably don’t speak English.”

“He speaks English. It’s getting him to shut up that’s the problem,” a man standing above you said with a laugh. “Lando, mate, snap out of it.”

You started to climb off his lap but his arms tightened around you and he shook his head with a wince. “Don’t move, you might have broken something.”

“Fuck, I’m so sorry,” you apologised again.

“Not me, you muppet,” he laughed. “You might have broken something.”

You patted yourself down, straightening your dress back into place at the same time, but everything felt fine. You tested your wrists and ankles too, only to notice you had indeed broken things.

“What’s the damage?” Lando asked.

“Ego mostly,” you admitted sheepishly. “I think I broke my heel on your face.”

“Pretty sure that was your glass,” he said looking at what remained in your hand, the sting of the cut on your palm finally appearing when you noticed the blood on the broken glass. “How bad is it? Am I hideous?”

“You are still a 10,” you giggled after noticing he was devastatingly handsome, even with the cut across his nose. Grabbing the hem of your dress, you gently dabbed the blood away before realising that it was a stupid idea. “You don’t have any diseases, do you?”

“Rabies,” his friend joked.

“Speak for yourself, mate,” Lando shot back and while they bickered jokingly you heard your name called from the river bank. “Is that your boyfriend?”

“Are you alive?” Lennon shouted as he ran along with the boat.

“Nope, I’ve died and gone to heaven!”

“I’ll let Sarah know!” He grew smaller as he stopped running and the boat continued downstream to some unknown destination.

“That’s my best friend’s boyfriend,” you explained as you patted your bra but found your phone missing. “Can I borrow your phone? I think mine drowned.”

Lando carefully shifted you so he could get to his pocket before settling you back on his lap. The grateful smile you gave him almost made him drop the device and he had to enter his passcode in twice before he got it right.

“Where is this boat heading to?” you asked as the dial tone connected. “Hey, it’s me, calm down, I’m alive.”

“Good, I’ll kill you myself! You gave me a fucking heart attack, woman!” You had to hold the phone away from your ear as she shouted her concern.

“I didn’t do it on purpose, but I’m sorry for giving you a heart attack.”

“As you should be! Len said you landed on some guy. Is he hot?”

Your face heated and you knew he had heard the question with the curious look on his face. “Mhmm, very.”

“You should invite him to the party and do a little sexy dance for him!”

“I don’t think that’s a good idea. I kind of…broke his face.”

The silence was damning before you swore you heard her laugh from all the way upstream. “Only you could have the worst luck with men.”

“Trust me, I know all too well. Anyway, they are stopping at the Rose Bridge so I’ll just meet you guys there. Guess my luck isn’t all that bad.”

You ended the call and handed the phone back.

“What party are you going to?” Lando asked as he pocketed it again.

“I don’t know, it’s some house party. There’s a local DJ playing.”

Lando’s smile grew and he pointed to his friend. “Local DJ, ha!”

As it turned out the house party wasn’t actually a party at someone’s house and the DJ wasn’t just locally renowned. Once you were finally introduced to Lando’s friend you found out he was the DJ, Martin Garrix, and Lando was even more famous.

“I can’t afford a lawsuit,” you groaned when you realised you had practically assaulted a celebrity.

“It’s just a scratch,” Lando assured you after Martin found a first aid kick. His poor attempt at wrapping a bandage made Lando look like a mummy so you took the box yourself and found a couple of small butterfly stitches. “Nothing a kiss wouldn’t fix.”

You giggled at his flirty nature you had come to adore in the last hour and if you hadn’t drunk so much liquid courage at the bar you probably wouldn't have been able to lean closer and kiss his cheek. His skin was warm and soft beneath your lips and when you opened your eyes you found his blue eyes staring intently back. “Better?”

He shook his head. “Nope, I think it needs another try.”

“Hmmm, good idea.” You kissed his other cheek and grinned when he pouted. “No? One last try.”

Your fingers delighted in the feel of his soft hair as you combed the curls and dipped your head to his. Your heart rate spiked and you closed your eyes as you kissed his pillow-soft lips teasingly slowly before his hands cupped your face and he deepened the kiss.

You broke away with a small gasp and your eyes were wide with the want for more. It was a look reflected on Lando’s face as he gently stroked your heated cheeks.

“Hey, lovebirds! We’re here,” Martin called as the boat reached the canal edge.

You kicked off your broken heels and Lando frowned before he gave you his, looping his fingers into the straps of your shoes to carry them. You were already wearing his shirt since your dress had his blood on it and you were certain you looked at absolute mess.

“Ready to party, Angel?”

“Angel?”

“What else would I call a beautiful woman who fell from the heavens?” Lando wondered if he was making a mistake and moving to fast like he always did but it was too late, the question was already out there.

“You could call me your girlfriend.” You cringed in an instant. “I mean not tonight, that would be way too quick but-”

Lando cut you off with a kiss and you felt his smile against your lips before he asked, “How about tomorrow?”

[javiscigarette]

Silent Night

Joel Miller x f!reader

Summary: You’re home for the holidays and Joel isn't gonna let a drinking contest or a house full of people stop him.

Warnings: PWP ofc, established relationship, mentions of drinking/alcohol, having to keep quiet?, oral (f&m receiving), thigh grinding, creampie, breeding kink, come play, getting caught, I think that's all lmk if I missed anything

w/c: 6.6k

a/n: hiii everyone! I am in fact alive! I'm finally on break from school and this is just a lil something I wrote real quick bc I've been in the holiday spirit since before October even ended hehehe :) Anyway, thank u to the actual loml @undrthelights for beta reading and finding the perfect pics!! It's nice to be back! Please leave a comment letting me know if you liked it, support is what keeps writers going!! Love u all!!

my masterlist

Your hips grind a little harder against his thigh, a soft sight falling from your lips as he licks and sucks at the spot under your ear that drives you absolutely wild. “I don't think I can be quiet” you whisper, gasping softly when his tongue swipes over your pulse.  "You can" he mumbles against the side of your neck, the vibrations of his voice and his warm breath against your skin sending burning hot sparks down your spine. “You can do whatever I ask, can’t you baby?”

You can hear them downstairs, muffled sounds of Joel and several other of your family members talking and laughing while they sip on the fancy whiskey that your dad was saving for the occasion. You opted out of it, quickly taking up the offer of the first hour or two of alone time you’ve had since you arrived at your parents house two days ago instead. You figured Joel could use the time too, talking with your dad and uncles and cousins about whatever men talk about when they’re doing whiskey tasting in the mancave of a basement. 

You managed to avoid getting roped into watching a shitty Hallmark Christmas movie with the rest of your family or helping them prep for the big dinner tomorrow. After successfully sneaking away to your old childhood bedroom that’s now redecorated as a simple guest room, you're left with nothing to do besides relax. First up was a long shower with the water so hot you nearly scalded your skin, and now you’re cozied up in bed, nose buried deep in the middle of your book while the rest of the house buzzed with muted background noise. 

Time passes without you noticing, too engrossed in your book to keep track, but eventually the bedroom door creaks open, pulling you back to reality. You’re about to tell off whoever is at the door for interrupting you, but you immediately soften when Joel slips inside, quietly closing the door behind him. 

He looks so sweet, wrapped up in a thick dark brown sweater, his curls flopping over his forehead, a light dusting of pink on his cheeks and the bridge of his nose with a lopsided smile. His eyes are soft, warm, and a bit glassy as he looks at you like you’re the best thing he ever did see.

"Think your dad is trying to kill me" he says, his words slurring just a bit as he crosses the room over to the bed.

You giggle, watching him plop down on the bed on his back, his head rolling over to look at you, "Are you surprised? He does this to you every year."

It's true, every holiday at your parents house, your dad insists on the whiskey "tasting", which is really just him pouring heavy handed shots and glasses and seeing who's going to be the last one to tap out. Usually it's just him and his brothers in the end, hashing out some decades old sibling rivalry in the form of a drinking contest. And ever since the first time you brought Joel home for the holiday five years ago, your father has insisted on dragging him down there and challenging him too.

The first year was the worst with Joel not heeding any of your warnings about how much liquor your dad would actually push on him. Joel was so sick by the end of the night that he made best friends with the toilet and passed out on the couch, then spent most of the next morning with a massive hangover, apologizing profusely to your dad about it who just laughed and said that he can try again next year.

Thankfully, Joel knows his limits now and has made peace with the fact that he'll never beat your dad at his own game. It doesn't mean that the challenge doesn't still stand.

"No" he mumbles, a dopey smile spreading across his face, "Guess I jus' never expect him to pour shots big enough to knock out a horse"

"How many did you have this time?" You ask, bookmarking your place in the book before setting it aside, sitting up a little straighter and adjusting the pillows behind your back.

"Jus' three."

"Oh, so you are  just a lightweight then?"

"I'm not a fuckin' lightweight" he grumbles with a dramatic pout. 

You laugh as you turn to lay on your side, propping yourself up on your elbow. Your hand instinctively falls to his hair, a small content sigh falling from his lips as your fingertips skate across his hairline and glide through his soft curls.  scooting closer to him and reaching down to run your fingers through his hair, "Okay, baby" you hum, smiling when his eyes fall shut as your nails gently scratch his scalp, "If you say so."

Joel melts under your touch, like a cat basking in the sun, a lazy little grin on his face and a dreamy, far off look in his eyes. His face is still flushed, the tips of his ears and the tops of his cheeks a rosy shade of pink, his lips slightly parted, a few more stray curls falling across his forehead. He looks absolutely gorgeous, and the soft, tender look in his eyes when he finally looks back up at you melts you from the inside out.

You cup the side of his face in your hand and ;ean in to press a lingering kiss to his forehead. "You're so cute when you're drunk" you murmur, moving kissing his cheek.

"M'not drunk"

You pull back to look him in the eye, smiling, "Sure you're not"

"I'm not" he whines, "M'just a lil' tipsy."

"Alright" you hum, pressing a quick kiss to his pouty lips.

Joel follows your mouth with the softest whine when you start to pull back, his large hand cupping the back of your head, holding you still while he kisses you, needy, but still so sweet. The taste of whiskey is heavy on his tongue as it slides against yours, a soft, satisfied noise rumbling in his chest when you part your lips further, kissing him deeper. 

When he finally lets you break the kiss, you're left just a little breathless and dazed, a giddy feeling swirling low in your belly. His pupils are blown when he looks up at you, his lips spit slick and plump, a lopsided smile on his face. He turns a little more on his side facing you, his fingers fiddling with the hem of your t-shirt until his hand slips easily underneath like it was meant to be there. The warmth of his palm smoothing up and down the curve of your spine is soothing, his fingers gently tracing over your ribs and the dip of your waist, the slight scratch of his calluses over your skin sending a shiver down your spine.

His eyes are half-lidded as he stares at your lips, licking his own. Realistically, you knew exactly what was going to happen as soon as he entered the bedroom. You know how he gets when he's like this, soft, sweet, and incredibly needy. With all the amount of times he tugged you into a bar bathroom after he's had a few, or when Tommy drops him off after a night out and he's already halfway to undressing you before the front door even shuts. You know he's trouble like this, but you can never deny him when he's looking at you like that, like you're the only thing he needs, the only thing he's ever needed.

He leans in to kiss you again, slow and sweet, his fingers splaying on your lower back and keeping you close. His mouth moves languidly against yours, the tip of his tongue tracing your bottle lip and his teeth sinking in the slightest bit to nip and tug, pulling a desperate little sound out from the back of your throat. 

He sighs at the small sound and starts to lean into you more, using his weight to roll you over until you're flat on your back with him hovering above you, his forearms on either side of your head with his knees bracketing your hips. The kisses grow hungrier, wetter, more insistent, his mouth moving against yours like he's trying to breathe the very air from your lungs. 

He shifts a bit and you moan softly into his mouth when his thigh slots between yours, the firm muscle of his thigh pushing right up against the apex of your thighs, the perfect amount of pressure to make heat spark and smolder in your belly. He does it again, rocking his thigh up against you just a little harder, swallowing the needy whimper that you let out, the heat and friction making you ache. 

You can’t help but grind against his thigh, the seam of your sweatpants pressing against the damp spot that’s already forming on your panties and digging into your clit just right. You’re chasing the growing pleasure, the firmness of his thigh and the intoxicating taste of whiskey on his soft lips mixed with the faint trace of his peppermint toothpaste. You’d give anything to have him, for him to take you, but the sounds of laughter and chatter coming from downstairs is a rude reminder of reality. 

"Joel" you warn with absolutely no heat in your voice, his lips grazing the sensitive spot under your ear, "We can't.”

He ignores you for a beat, crashing his lips back on yours and kissing you until he needs to come up for air. 

"We can" he says, his voice gravelly and thick with want, the deep rumble vibrating in his chest. "We're bein' real quiet"

His lips trail across the line of your jaw and up your cheek before landing on your mouth again. The slow, lazy drag of his tongue against yours makes you throb, another soft when escaping you and the muscles in your legs and stomach tightening as you make no effort to stop moving against his thigh. 

“Everyone will hear us” you try feebly, knowing it’s futile. 

Joel smirks against your lips, the bastard. “Nah. I’ll be quiet.” 

You know he's a damn liar and a bad one at that. In what world could you be quiet with his hands and mouth on you, with his thick cock buried deep inside you, stretching you out and filling you up so good that your toes curl? And in what world could he be quiet, not running his mouth about how good you feel, how pretty you look stuffed full of him, how well you take him. You know exactly how it'll go, if the numerous failed previous attempts are anything to go by.

But then his lips are on the side of your neck, and you're forgetting why it matters. You let your eyes fall shut as his lips press gentle, wet kisses up and down the column of your throat, the stubble on his cheeks and chin scratching and tickling in the best way. You're quickly forgetting why this was a bad idea to begin with.

Your hips grind a little harder against his thigh, a soft sight falling from your lips as he licks and sucks at the spot under your ear that drives you absolutely wild. “I don't think I can,” you whisper, gasping softly when his tongue swipes over your pulse point. 

"You can" he mumbles against the side of your neck, the vibrations of his voice and his warm breath against your skin sending burning hot sparks down your spine. “You can do whatever I ask, can’t you baby?” 

“I don’t- oh…” 

The rest of your sentence dies on the tip of your tongue as he pushes his thigh against you, grinding it up against your core in a way that has your head spinning and toes curling, the pleasure sharp and delicious as it melts into your veins. 

“That’s right” he murmurs, pressing a chaste kiss to the corner of your mouth. “You’ll do whatever I say, huh?” 

There’s a pause and when you open your eyes, his are dark, his pupils blown wide, the deep brown nearly swallowed whole. His hair is tousled and curlier than ever, a few loose strands hanging in his face. His lips are slightly parted, swollen, red, and sick and shiny from your kisses. He’s an absolute sight and you can’t help but nod, eager to do whatever he wants, whatever he asks, because god it’s always worth it. 

His eyes crinkle a bit at the corners and the lopsided smirk on his face widens. He’s the fucking devil. 

Just the thought of him taking you with the rest of the house full of your extended family is making your veins buzz, excitement bubbling low in your belly. But you're well aware of just how thin the walls are and how nosy some members of your family are and you can't fathom how awkward it would be to come down for breakfast the next morning after the whole house heard you getting absolutely railed.

"It’ll be okay" he assures, reading your thoughts, his hands slipping under your shirt again. The fabric bunches up over his wrists as he slides his palms up your torso to cup your breasts, his thumbs brushing over your nipples. "M’not gonna let anyone else hear you. Just me."

Fuck.

His simple words are enough to convince you, not that you needed much convincing in the first place. He had you wrapped around his finger and him around yours, and there was no way you were going to say no to what you know will come next. A jolt of electricity shoots down your spine and settles hot and heavy in the pit of your stomach. Your resolve breaks, your legs falling open further, letting him get even closer, and Joel lets out a soft, happy noise against your mouth.

"Atta girl" he hums, his voice rough and deep, "So good for me, aren't ya baby?"

"Always" you manage to reply, the word more of a sigh as you arch your back, his thumb teasing your nipple until it's pebbled and hard.

He gives into you easily, tugging your shirt up and over your head. His mouth lands on your chest as soon as it’s exposed, immediately licking and kissing across your collarbones and the swell of your breast. He noses along the valley between them, the coarse hair of his beard tickling your skin and making you giggle. You can feel him grinning against your skin before he nips and sucks at the supple flesh until a red mark rises to the surface. 

You squirm beneath him, his leg still nestled perfectly between yours and pressing against you every time he shifts. The pressure is building in your gut, your clit aching and throbbing. The feeling is almost too much with his hot wet mouth now wrapped around your nipple, his tongue swirling around the stiff peak making it harder and harder for you to keep quiet. 

“Joel,” you hiss, the word half warning and half plea. 

“Hush, baby” he mumbles against your skin. His fingers replace his mouth, pinching and teasing your swollen, spit-slick nipple as he kisses across your chest to lavish your other nipple with the same attention. 

“Gotta be quiet, remember?” he says when he pulls back, releasing your nipple with a wet pop. “Unless you want everyone hearin’ ya” 

You open your mouth to say something in protest, to tell him that he’s making things a lot harder right now, but then he starts moving, sliding down the bed and the words die in your throat. The look he gives you as he settles on his stomach between your thighs is sinful, his eyes dark and mischievous, his lips pulled up into a smirk. 

He hooks his fingers in the waistband of your sweats, slowly pulling them along with your panties down your legs, leaving you completely bare. Your stomach swoops at the sight of his eyes trained to your center and your thighs twitch, wanting to snap shut and hide. But his hands on both of your thighs keep you spread open for him. You swallow thickly, your breath catching in your throat, the anticipation building in the pit of your belly as your slick starts to drip down the cleft of your ass. 

Joel’s mouth falls open slightly, a shaky breath escaping him. “Fuck, baby” he sighs, tongue darting out to lick his cherry red lips, his eyes glazing over. A small, content smile tugs at the corners of your mouth, a swell of pride blossoming in your chest. He looks wrecked, like a starving man eyeing his first meal, and the way he's looking at you so intently, like you're the best thing he's ever seen, the thing that's kept him alive all these years, is making your heart pound almost painfully in your chest. 

“Fucking gorgeous,” he praises, his hand running along the inside of your thigh. “And all mine.” 

Like he can’t wait another second, he’s leaning in and licking a long, wet stripe up your center, dragging his tongue through your folds from your leaking hole to your swollen, needy clit. The feeling of his tongue on you pulls a soft, broken sound from you. You clap your hand over your mouth as your head spins, a rush of pleasure washing over you making the muscles in your thighs and stomach twitch and flex. 

He does it again and again, and every time his tongue flicks over the swollen bud, you let out a soft whine that sounds far too loud in the otherwise quiet room.

He groans against you, his mouth already wet and messy as he laps at your pussy like he's starving for it, like he would die without tasting you. His eyes are locked on yours, the look in them so dark and primal that it makes your walls clench, more slick freely leaking out of you and onto his tongue. He laps it up happily, his fingers digging into your hips, holding you steady as his mouth works your clit.

He lets out a quiet, breathy moan when you slide your hand through his hair once again, your fingers tangling in and pulling on the soft brown strands. His eyes flutter shut, a shuddery exhale falling from his parted lips, and the feeling of his warm breath fanning over your wet, sensitive center has you stifling another high pitched whimper.

You roll your hips up against his face, desperate for more, and he gets the hint, the flat of his tongue swiping up through your folds a few more times before he dips it into your entrance, pushing in and out while his nose nudges at your clit. You're writhing beneath him, tugging at his hair, trying so hard to be quiet but failing miserably, soft, desperate little noises pouring out of your mouth. You know he's loving it too, making no effort to keep your noises at bay, not giving a single fuck about who might hear.

He moans against your cunt, the vibrations making you jolt, your hips rolling up to meet him. You're panting, the hand that isn't buried in his hair gripping the sheets tight enough that your knuckles turn white, and your back arches when his tongue fucks in and out of you faster, rougher.

"Joel, fuck" you gasp, "I- I'm-

He growls, the sound muffled by your pussy, the vibrations and the feeling of his stubble dragging along your inner thighs making your toes curl, the familiar coil in your belly tightening, your thighs trembling.

He doubles down, bringing a hand between your legs to replace his tongue with two thick fingers sinking into you and curling up against that spot inside you that has you seeing stars, his tongue circling your clit while his fingers pump in and out of you, his mouth and hand working in tandem to pull you apart.

"Fuck, I'm close" you whimper, his fingers crooking against that spot inside of you, sending white hot fire coursing through your veins as your slick leaks down his fingers and into his palm like hot honey. 

He hums, sucking your clit between his lips, and your legs clamp around his head, your hand tightening in his hair as your orgasm crashes over you, your back arching off the mattress, a muffled, broken moan spilling out from behind your hand. He fucks you through it, his tongue flattening out against your clit while the tips of his fingers rub against that sweet spot inside of you, sending more sparks of pleasure tingling up and down your spine.

When it's too much, when the sensitivity makes tears prick in the corners of your eyes, you make a feeble attempt to push him away. He pulls back, sitting up on his knees, his chin and cheeks wet with your slick, his pupils blown so wide that the brown is almost completely swallowed up by black. He stares at you, his gaze so heavy and intense that it makes another shiver run down your spine.

"You're not being very quiet" he smirks as he moves off the bed to stand up.

You roll your eyes, still coming down from the aftershocks, your thighs quivering, "Yeah, no shit" you mutter, propping yourself up on your elbows.

He chuckles as he pulls off his sweater and the t-shirt underneath it before he starts unbuckling his belt and working on his jeans. You sit up, shuffling closer to the edge of the bed, reaching out and batting his hands away, taking over and quickly unfastening the button and pulling the zipper down.

He doesn't protest, letting you push his jeans and boxers down his legs until he kicks them all the way off. Your mouth waters at the sight of his thick, hard cock hanging heavy between his legs, flushed a deep red with slippery precum beading at the tip. You reach out, wrapping your hand around the base and taking a moment or two to revel in the familiar weight and warmth of him in your hand.

He shudders, a low moan rumbling in his chest, his eyes slipping shut as his hand moves to cup the back of your head. He watches you intently as you take your time, lazily stroking him, rubbing the pad of your thumb over the leaking tip and tracing the throbbing veins that run along the sides. His breathing grows heavy, his jaw clenching and his stomach muscles twitching as he tries so hard not to buck his hips up into the loose circle of your fist.

"C'mon, sweetheart" he pleads, the words leaving his mouth as a low, breathless groan, "Get me all nice and wet for you."

He doesn't have to ask twice. You lean forward and you dart your tongue out to lap up the bead of precum, humming at the salty, bitter taste of it, swirling the flat of your tongue over the head of his cock, your hand pumping the rest of his shaft. His breath catches in his throat, a stuttered curse falling from his lips when you dip your tongue into the slit, teasing more precum out.

He groans, his grip on the back of your head tightening, urging you to take him into the warm, wet heat of your mouth. You sink down, flattening your tongue and taking him all the way until he hits the back of your throat, the tip of his cock brushing against the roof of your mouth. You breathe through your nose, hollowing your cheeks, swallowing around him, and the deep, guttural groan that he lets out has you squirming, slick leaking out of your cunt and onto the sheets below.

"There ya go" he pants, his head lolling back, "Oh, baby, that's it. S'fuckin' perfect."

You pull off, a string of spit and precum connecting his cock to your bottom lip, and you look up at him through your lashes.

"Need to be quiet" you remind him, "Or else I'll stop"

He lets out a shaky breath and nods, swallowing hard, his Adam's apple bobbing in his throat. He's not used to keeping quiet, not used to not telling you how good you feel, not used to not begging you to let him cum in that low, raspy tone that never fails to make you weak.

"I'll be good," he whispers, breathless and needy. "Promise."

Your stomach swoops at his words, arousal burning bright in your belly. Unable to stay away for much longer, you lean forward, pressing a soft kiss to the head of his cock. His hips jerk, another drop of precum leaking out. You lick it up, swirling your tongue around the sensitive, swollen tip before sinking down again. You take him into the wet heat of your mouth, hollowing your cheeks and swallowing around him, bobbing your head slowly and steadily.

He bites his lip hard enough to draw blood trying with all his might to keep his noises in as you drool all over his cock. He can't take his eyes off you, watching the way he disappears into the slick heat of your mouth. You look so pretty with your lips wrapped around him, spit dripping down his cock and leaking out the corners of your mouth while your eyes water as you take him as far as you can.

You take him deeper, and you swallow, your throat convulsing around him, and the way his whole body shudders makes you smile, proud of the effect you have on him. He's so big and thick, and you both know you can't fit him all the way down your throat, but seeing you try your best is enough to make his thighs start to shake. 

His cock hits the back of your throat again and again, the tip dipping into the soft, warm, tight space, and Joel's breathing is getting heavier and faster, his jaw clenched and his eyebrows knitted together.

"Shit" he grits out under his breath, "That's it, sweetheart. That's fuckin' it."

The praise goes straight between your legs, a fresh wave of slick leaking out of you and it's too tempting to resist, so you slip your hand between your thighs and rub circles around your clit, moaning softly around his cock.

He hisses, his eyes snapping down, watching your hand disappear between your legs.

"Are you touchin' yourself?" he asks, the words coming out rough and choked, his eyebrows raised.

You nod, sliding a finger into yourself, and you pull off his cock, panting, a thin strand of spit connecting the head to your bottom lip.

"Can't help it" you whine pathetically, your voice already raspy from how far his cock had been down your throat.

Joel groans, his dick twitching, and he's had enough. He takes a step back, and you let go, a little confused and worried that you've done something wrong. But he just takes hold of your arms and yanks you off the bed, his strong hands easily manhandling you, and then he's pushing you, turning you around and bending you over the side of the mattress.

"Oh" you breathe out, bracing yourself on your forearms, arching your back, sticking your ass up in the air.

You don't have to wait long for him to move. His hand is smoothing over your ass, the other one guiding his cock towards your sopping cunt. He teases the tip between your folds, spreading your slick and dragging his head over your swollen clit a few times before lining himself up and sinking in.

You bite down on the inside of your cheek to keep quiet, letting out a stuttering breath, the familiar, delicious burn of his thick cock stretching you out making your eyes roll back into your head. You've made peace with the face that you'll never be used to his size. It'll always be too much, the feeling of him pushing into, forcing your walls to make room for him will always make you clench and shiver.

He's got his hands on your hips, holding you steady as he bottoms out, his hips flush with the curve of your ass with the tip of his cock pressed against your cervix. He holds himself there for a moment, both of you adjusting to the feeling, and you're trying so hard not to moan, to keep your noises muffled by the mattress, and you know Joel's struggling too, his jaw clenched tight and his brow furrowed.

"Good girl" he whispers, his fingers digging into the soft flesh of your hips, "Taking my cock so well, aren't ya?"

You nod, whimpering, your fingers twisting in the sheets.

He pulls back and thrusts back in, setting a steady, slow rhythm, the wet slide of his cock making the most obscene sounds. And it's driving you crazy, the need to let out loud, your chest burning with the effort of keeping your noises in. He keeps his pace slow, not wanting to make more noise with his hips snapping against your ass. It’s nearly tortuous though, the drag of his cock in and out of you so slow that you can feel every ridge as he takes his sweet time. You can only handle it for a few moments before the tingling hints of pain from the stretch subside and the burning need for him to fuck you senseless takes over.

"Joel" you whine, "Faster, please."

He leans over you, his front pressed against your back, his lips grazing the shell of your ear. "You're not gonna stay quiet if I do," he says, his voice deep and gravelly, "Just take what I give you, sweetheart."

You're so worked up, the slow pace makes you even more desperate for him, and you can't help it, you need more, and you reach a hand back and grab his hip, urging him to speed up.

"I-I'll try" you promise, "Please, just- Just fuck me, Joel, please"

He hesitates, but the way you're squirming beneath him is so tempting, and the way his cock is throbbing and dripping inside of you is telling him that he needs more too.

Before you can say anything else, he's pulling back, the thick, heavy weight of him sliding out of you. You whimper at sudden empty feeling but you don't have time to complain before he's flipping you over onto your back and scooting you up the bed before climbing on top of you. You can’t help but notice how big he is, the muscles flexing smoothly in his strong arms that box you in as he hovers above you, nearly encompassing your entire body underneath his. His mouth is on yours before you can even blink, his tongue slipping past your lips and kissing you like his life depends on it.

He settles between your legs, his hips nestled in the cradle of your thighs, his cock dragging along your clit again warm and heavy, and you gasp, the sound swallowed by his mouth. You're squirming again, desperate to feel him stretch you out more and he takes mercy on you, reaching between your bodies and grabbing the base of his cock, guiding the thick head towards your entrance.

"Gotta be quiet, baby" he warns, his eyes boring into yours as he looks down at you. "Those pretty noises are just for me, yeah? Can't have anyone hearin' 'em."

You nod frantically and the next second he's pushing in, the fat head of his cock forcing its way into you and bottoming out in one smooth motion. You let out a gasp that's definitely too loud but Joel is quick to remedy it, his hand coming up to cover your mouth, his fingers splaying across your cheek.

"Shh" he shushes you, his hips rolling, the slow, lazy drag of his cock against your walls making you clench around him. Your eyes roll back, your back arching as his hand stops all the whiny little sounds you can't help but make. He continues to fuck you slow and deep, his cock sliding in and out of your soaking wet cunt, the filthy sounds of skin slapping against skin echoing softly in the room.

You can't take your eyes off him, watching his eyes squeeze shut, the muscles in his arms and shoulders flexing as he fucks you, his brows knitted together and his teeth sunk into his bottom lip. He looks beautiful like this, sweat glistening on his skin, his jaw tight, and his eyes shut tight, his mouth hanging open with his breaths coming out in soft, barely audible pants.

"Mmm" he hums, his hips picking up speed, his cock pushing impossibly deeper. "You feel so fuckin' good, baby. Fuck."

You reflexively clench around him and a shudder runs through his whole body.

"Gettin' real tight" he pants, "Tryna milk the cum right outta me, huh? Tryna make me fill up that pretty pussy?"

You whimper into his palm, your pussy fluttering, a fresh wave of slick coating his cock, and he groans, his hips picking up speed.

"S'what you want?" he asks in a hushed tone, his hand still pressed firmly over your mouth. "You want me to fill you up? Make a mess of that pretty pussy? Breed you until you're fuckin' stuffed, baby girl?"

Your back arches off the bed, the coil in your belly so tight that you think you might pass out. He's rambling, his thrusts losing rhythm, his breathing getting ragged and choppy, his chest heaving and his thighs shaking.

"That's it" he coaxes when you tighten around him even more, "Can feel it, can feel how close you are. Go on, baby, cum on my cock. Wanna feel that tight, wet cunt cum all over my cock, please, baby."

His hips snap forward, his cock pushing deep into you, the tip rubbing against the spongy spot deep inside you that makes the coil in your belly finally snap. Your eyes roll back, a muffled, broken moan falling from your lips as your entire body convulses, your orgasm washing over you and making your toes curl as your walls flutter around his cock buried to the hilt inside of you.

Joel lets out a deep, low groan, his hips stuttering as he fucks you through your orgasm. His hand slips away from your mouth so he can grip your hips with both hands, his fingers digging into the soft flesh, holding you in place so he can chase after his own release. His chest is tight as he holds in his grunts and groans, but it’s barely any use with the lewd noises that fill the room as your pussy gushes around him, your slick leaking past the tight seal of your walls around him and dripping down to his balls. 

"Oh, shit, baby. Christ,” he chokes out, his stomach muscles clenching as his hips slam into yours, his cock pushing impossibly deeper and harder. “Keep makin’ a mess, keep lettin’ me feel it. That’s it. Fuckin’ hell.” 

You can feel his cock starting to throb inside of you and you know he’s close. And you can’t stop the words from leaving your mouth, the need to let him know just how good he’s making you feel is destroying any bit of common sense. 

“Want you to fill me up,” you whine. “Please, Joel, wanna feel it.” 

That’s all it takes. His jaw clenches, his nose scrunching as his eyes squeeze shut. His cock twitches and pulses as he buries himself as deep as he can get before spilling into, filling you with thick, hot ropes of his cum. His hips jerking and stuttering d you clench around him, squeezing and milking him for everything he has while he buries his face in the crook of your neck, muffling his broken, ragged moans against your skin.

"So good,” he whimpers. “Fuckin’ perfect.” 

The praise goes straight between your legs and you wrap your arm around his shoulders, trying to pull him closer. He lifts his head, his palm resting on your cheek as he lifts his head and presses his lips against yours, kissing you languidly. His hips rock back and forth lazily, pushing his cum in as deep as he can get it. You melt into the bed underneath him, the only things keeping you tethered to the earth being your fingers combing through his hair and your legs tightening around his waist.

When he finally pulls away, he rests his forehead against yours, and you're both left panting, trying to catch your breath. You listen to the muffled sounds of people downstairs, the movie playing and their drunken voices filtering in through the door, and Joel must be thinking the same thing because he chuckles.

"Well" he says, his thumb rubbing back and forth over your cheekbone, "I don't think anyone heard us."

"You better hope they didn't" you retort, a grin on your face. Joel rolls his eyes. "That's a weird way to say thank you" he teases. You start to laugh, but the sound dies in your throat, morphing to a whimper instead when he starts pulling out his softening cock.

"Joel" you whine, but he doesn't stop. "Joel, please. It's-"

He's not listening, he's too focused on the way his cock looks when he pulls out. The tip slips out of you, and the rest follows, and his eyes widen as he watches a string of thick, sticky cum stretch from the tip of his cock to your cunt. It breaks, falling to your thigh, and he licks his lips. He can't tear his eyes away, watching the way your cunt flutters, and his cum starts to drip out, running down your slit, the obscene sight making Joel's spent cock twitch. 

"Shit" he mutters under his breath, "Ain't that a pretty picture."

He reaches down, dragging a finger through the mess of cum and slick and gathering it on his finger before pushing it back into your cunt. You clench around the digit before he sighs and pulls it back out.

"Gonna be leaking all day tomorrow" he murmurs, almost to himself.

You whimper, the thought of having him dripping out of you all day like that has renewed arousal already seeping into your veins. 

“It’s okay” he assures you, leaning down to press a kiss to your forehead. “I’ll take care ya. Clean you up and put my cock back in right where it belongs, how’s that sound, hm?” 

You sigh, nodding, a wave of fatigue washing over you. “Sounds perfect,” you agree. 

You watch as he climbs off of you and starts to move, but a sudden, sharp sound of knuckles knocking on the other side of the bedroom door makes you both freeze. 

“You two are fucking disgusting!” the voice of your cousin calls out, accompanied by the sound of a couple other people giggling and laughing. “Put some goddamn clothes on and get down here!” 

You and Joel exchange glances, his eyes wide and apologetic, his cheeks burning bright red as you give him a look that says I told you so. 

“Alright, alright, we’re coming” he yells back. 

“We’re coming! Oh, yeah we’re coming!” another voice teases, the sound of everyone bursting out laughing quickly follows. 

“We’re never doing that again” Joel mutters and you can’t help but chuckle. 

“Yeah right. Keep telling yourself that”

Thank you for reading!!! Plsss let me know if you enjoyed hehehe

[cornyforjk]

Drive you crazy | Day 1 | jjk

SUMMARY In which you are stuck living with an arrogant rookie racer who thinks of you as an obstacle, ready to ruin your glory, but things get heated when he has a pervy smile hidden under that pretentious attitude. Emotions that are complicated. You could never fall for your enemy! He's sabotaging you.

Pairing: racer!jk × racer!oc

Genre: angst and pure filth smut

Warnings: trash language only for now.

A/note: HI I'M SCARED BUT HI ALL THE BEST HAVE FUN . First chapter out and I am already head over heels for this Jungkook. I'd say to keep your hobi water ready anytime cause the spice never ends.

___________________♡____________________

"You'd be better off as a pornstar, why not start an only fans page."

The guy beside me whispered as I clenched my fist, a helmet covering his face. Well he was lucky the helmet was there to protect him, or else by now, his limbs would've fallen apart, bit by bit until he was screeching for mercy.

"Stay out of my way." My helmet was a barrier to the fiery glare I was sending his side. I heard him emit an audible but distressed sigh as his tongue clicked in disappointment.

I scanned him from head to toe, not as if I knew him, but my desire to call him a "gay stripper" grew stronger with each tap on the floor.

I close my eyes, collecting my thoughts that were scattered around an endless black hole. Echoes of heels clicking against the floor catching my attention, ear perking up I fix my posture, shoulders rolling back, clearing my parched throat.

A woman with huge circular glasses resting on the bridge of her nosewalked in. Her pencil skirt accentuated her broad hips, her blue eyes fixed on the notepad wrapped around her arm, and the silver metallic pen held her elegant hairstyle together.

She was the definition of what I call 'classy'.

I suddenly felt my shoulders slouch down when her blue icy eyes scanned me, her orbs slowly widening in astonishment. I raise my hand giving a small wave with a crooked smile.

Maybe that was a bit too crooked. Screw it! She can't see me.

"Ahh..." I suddenly squealed under her intense gaze that was scanning me over and over again, pushing the glasses that adorned her button nose back. She cleared her throat grazing over her notepad one last time.

"Lady, you know I am still here, right? Maybe you can do this goo-goo eyes after I'm checked in." The guy beside me commented, earning an eye roll which he couldn't witness. I stomp over his boots, almost throwing my whole weight on his foot.

"OUCH!" He grunts, turning my way, maybe or maybe not glaring like Donald Trump after he found out his steak was cooked medium rare and not brought alive.

"Fight me you ceramic bitch!" He shrieks, ready to throw hands. I hide behind the elegant woman for protection who just watched us bicker.

She cleared her throat again, catching me off guard. She turns my way. "Jungkook and Y/n?" She pursed her lips, narrowed cat-like eyes waiting for our nods.

"Jungkook...more like junk looks," I coughed out, wheezing at that lame pun, perhaps no one has the sense of humour of a five-year-old. The world is turning tables pretty quick.

"Ms Y/n, you aren't supposed to be here?" She waits for my reaction as I freeze on spot.

"What do you mean I am not supposed to be here?" My voice slightly rising, "I checked in myself as the new rookie in racing." I practically throw air quotes at her statement, panic wavering in my

voice.

The so-called guy 'Jungkook' choked, his broad chest heaving up and down as he laughed.

Did I say something funny?

"You are at the wrong location, I think there was an error in our system while registering you, we may have added your name to the wrong list." She ran her index finger across her crisp notepad, eyes moving back and forth like a hawk.

"No, no, no, no-no." I gasped, "do you know how long it took me to persuade my sponsor?! This is my only chance to race; if I don't enter, all of my years of preparation will be in vain."

She looked at me with sympathy. "Can't you make any changes to send me there?"

"I'm sorry...you won't be able to reach in time and we cannot let you go until the board takes a look at this major mistake and have you safely enter your designated place."

She tapped her foot on the marble floor.

Suddenly my head dropped, audibly sighing as my fingers tapped against my thighs. Just one opportunity is given...and it will all wash over like golden sand at the seashore.

"Okay, sad. Moving on, I'd like the Keys to my quarters." Jungkook arrogantly demanded, pushing his hand in front of the woman. She looked at him with no emotion, rolling her eyes, once again checking the name list.

Think Y/n! Think!

I felt my heart clench, the corner of my eyes collided with the water. My craving to have wind tangled in my locks while the engine roared at the starting line with determined racers kept increasing.

That desire in my heart burning stronger than any fuel.

"I can race here!" I exclaimed, earning a groan from the tall man beside me. The woman blinked her eyes, glasses almost falling off her snatched nose.

"Excuse me?"

"Well, I can race on this track here in California, till then your board can sort out all their work." Adrenaline rushed in my veins like hope, secretly fist-pumping the air. Finally, this could work out.

"Listen up kiddo, this is California. Here racers make history. They don't sit on the track to have some pink princess tea party, so you can take that bag of yours and move your ass out of this place because you don't belong here." His words were foul, a snarl creeping on.

He was filled with bitterness, swiftly peeling off the helmet on his face. His action left me speechless.

His ethereal beauty was hidden behind the helmet; his soft, glowing skin was the centre of attention; his doe-like eyes were pools of overflowing emotions; his soft lips, the bottom one a little fuller, a mole on his cheek and one under his lip.

I would've stumbled on my face gazingat such charm if only he wasn't being a jerk.

"It's because women aren't usually seen racing here, in fact for the last 50 years no women had the guts to continue on this track." The woman abruptly spoke. I felt the uncertainty in her voice. She was trying to cover up for that jerk.

"but there is no rule against women racing here." I protested back.

"Yes there isn't but-" "Then I race here."

Jungkook's intense stare had my knees go weak. I could feel the sharpness and cold wrath all at once. An unspoken cold blooded war was rising between us.

"What do you think you are doing?" Jungkook exclaimed, his warm hand skimming on my shoulder, the grip crushing my meek corpse.

His jaw clenched and eyes obscuring, he glowered behind the lustrous locks covering his orbs that bled out of outrage.

outrage.

Staring into his eyes my body shook violently, I harshly pushed him away, disgusted by the warmth his hands held. "Don't touch me." My eyes were bloodshot red, wrapping my hands around my torso.

"I won't be outmanoeuvred by a jerk. Especially you, Jungkook."

___________________♡____________________

Teaser | Day2

DM me or send me an ask to be added in the taglist.

[andy-15-07]

A Night in Venice

Pairing! Drew Starkey x reader

Words count: 3032

Masterlist | Outer Banks Masterlist

The gentle lapping of the waves against the wooden stilts of the Venetian docks created a rhythmic melody that floated through the air, mingling with the distant sounds of laughter and conversation from nearby cafés. The golden hour had painted the sky in hues of orange and pink, reflecting off the canals and the city’s intricate architecture. Venice was always enchanting, but tonight, it felt like magic was in the air. Drew Starkey stood at the edge of the dock, dressed in a sleek blue tuxedo that hugged his frame perfectly, a calm smile playing on his lips. His blue eyes sparkled as he looked out at the horizon, but his thoughts were far from the city’s beauty or even the prestigious Venice Film Festival, where his new movie Queer had just premiered to a standing ovation. Instead, they were on Y/N, who was a few steps behind, adjusting the strap of her dress.

Y/N had been there through it all. The late nights running lines, the exhaustion, the anxiety, and the triumphs. Drew had always been grateful for her, but tonight, seeing her standing there in the soft light, wearing a flowing gown that accentuated her every curve, he felt his heart swell with even more love.

"Do you ever get tired of looking so beautiful?" Drew teased, turning towards her with a grin that melted into a more sincere expression. He held out his hand, and Y/N took it, stepping closer to him.

"If I do, I’ll let you know," Y/N replied, a playful twinkle in her eyes. She squeezed his hand, her touch warm and familiar. "But right now, I’m more interested in getting lost in this city with you."

Drew chuckled, his thumb gently stroking the back of her hand. "We’ll have plenty of time for that. The night’s still young. But first, there’s something I want to do."

Y/N raised an eyebrow, intrigued. "Oh? And what might that be?"

Drew leaned in, his breath warm against her ear as he whispered, "You’ll see."

With that, he led her down the narrow streets, their footsteps echoing softly on the cobblestones. The festival had brought a buzz to Venice, but Drew knew exactly where to go to avoid the crowds. They wandered through the labyrinth of alleyways, passing under bridges and beside quiet canals. The city had a way of making you feel like you were the only two people in the world, and in that moment, Drew couldn’t have been happier.

Finally, they arrived at a small, secluded square with a single bench overlooking the water. The only sounds were the gentle ripples in the canal and the distant murmur of the festival in the background. Drew guided Y/N to the bench and sat down beside her, the soft fabric of their clothes brushing against each other.

"Drew, this is beautiful," Y/N said softly, her eyes wide as she took in the serene scene.

"I thought you might like it," Drew replied, wrapping an arm around her shoulders and pulling her closer. "But there’s more."

Y/N looked up at him, curiosity and affection shining in her gaze. "What do you mean?"

Drew reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out a small, velvet box. Y/N’s breath caught in her throat as she realized what it was. She turned to him, her eyes searching his, but before she could say anything, Drew opened the box to reveal a delicate ring, the diamond catching the light from the setting sun.

"Y/N," Drew began, his voice low and filled with emotion, "I’ve been trying to find the right words all night, but nothing seems enough. You’ve been with me through everything—my ups, my downs, my fears, and my dreams. You’re my best friend, my biggest supporter, and the love of my life. And I can’t imagine spending another day without you by my side as my wife."

Y/N’s eyes welled up with tears, and she covered her mouth with her hand, overwhelmed with emotion. "Drew…"

Drew’s heart pounded in his chest as he continued, "So, here in Venice, a place as timeless and beautiful as you, I’m asking you… Will you marry me?"

For a moment, the world seemed to stand still. The air was thick with anticipation, the only sound the distant hum of the city and the soft rustle of the wind through the trees. Then, with a tearful laugh, Y/N threw her arms around Drew, pulling him into a tight embrace.

"Yes," she whispered, her voice breaking with emotion. "Yes, Drew, I’ll marry you."

Drew felt a wave of relief and pure joy wash over him as he hugged her back, his eyes closing as he breathed in the moment. When they finally pulled apart, he slipped the ring onto her finger, the perfect fit symbolizing how perfect they were for each other.

They sat there for a while, wrapped up in each other and the beauty of the city around them. Venice had always been known for its romance, and now, it held an even more special place in their hearts.

After a while, Drew broke the silence with a soft chuckle. "You know, when I signed on to do Queer, I thought the most nerve-wracking part would be the premiere. But proposing to you? That was a whole new level."

Y/N laughed, resting her head on his shoulder. "I had no idea you were planning this. You kept it a secret so well."

"I wanted it to be perfect," Drew said, kissing the top of her head. "And seeing the look on your face when I asked… It was worth every bit of the stress."

They both laughed softly, the sound echoing in the stillness of the night. The tension had finally melted away, leaving behind a warm, content feeling.

As the evening continued, they wandered back towards the heart of the city, hand in hand, the ring on Y/N’s finger glinting under the streetlights. They passed other couples, tourists, and locals, all oblivious to the magical moment Drew and Y/N had just shared.

Eventually, they found themselves near the famous Rialto Bridge, where the festival’s afterparty was in full swing. The energy of the crowd was contagious, and Drew couldn’t help but feel a surge of excitement as they joined the festivities. But despite the glamour and the flashing lights, all Drew could think about was the woman by his side.

They danced together, swaying to the music with the lights of Venice twinkling around them. Drew’s hands were firm on Y/N’s waist, guiding her gently as they moved in perfect sync. It was as if the rest of the world had faded away, leaving just the two of them in their own private bubble.

"You’re a pretty good dancer," Y/N teased, her voice barely audible over the music.

Drew grinned, dipping her slightly before pulling her back up. "You make it easy."

As they danced, Drew couldn’t help but think about how far they had come. From their first meeting on the set of Outer Banks, to the quiet moments they shared away from the spotlight, to now, standing in the heart of Venice, celebrating not just his career, but the love they had built together. It felt like a dream, but the warmth of Y/N in his arms grounded him in the reality of it all.

As the night wore on, they eventually found themselves sitting on the edge of the canal, their feet dangling over the water. The afterparty had died down, leaving the city quiet and serene once more.

"Drew," Y/N began, her voice soft as she gazed out at the water. "I’ve been thinking… about us, and about everything we’ve been through."

Drew turned to her, his heart skipping a beat. "What is it?"

Y/N looked at him, her eyes reflecting the moonlight. "I know we’ve talked about it before, but now, with the ring and everything, it feels even more real. I want to be with you, Drew. I want to build a life with you, wherever that takes us."

Drew felt a lump form in his throat as he listened to her. "I want that too, Y/N. More than anything."

"But what about the distance?" Y/N continued, her voice wavering slightly. "Your career is taking off, and there’s going to be so much travel, so many commitments… I don’t want us to lose what we have."

Drew took a deep breath, understanding the weight of her words. "Y/N, I’ve thought about that too. And honestly, I’m not going to lie and say it won’t be hard. But I believe we can make it work. We’ve always found a way to be there for each other, no matter what. And now, with this ring, it’s a promise. A promise that I’ll always come back to you, no matter where I go."

Y/N looked into his eyes, searching for any hint of doubt. But all she saw was sincerity and love. "Do you really believe that?"

"I do," Drew said firmly, his hand finding hers and squeezing it gently. "And I’m willing to do whatever it takes to make sure we don’t lose what we have. I love you, Y/N. I want to spend the rest of my life with you."

Y/N’s eyes filled with tears again, but this time they were tears of relief and happiness. "I love you too, Drew. So much."

They sat there in silence for a moment, the only sound the gentle lapping of the water against the canal walls. The weight of their conversation hung in the air, but it was a good weight—a reassuring one.

Eventually, Y/N leaned her head on Drew’s shoulder, feeling the warmth of his body next to hers. They stayed like that for a while, soaking in the quietness of the night, the only witnesses to their love being the ancient buildings of Venice and the stars above.

"Do you remember when we first met?" Y/N asked, her voice barely above a whisper.

Drew chuckled softly, the memory clear in his mind. "Of course I do. You were the new production assistant on set, and I think I was more nervous to meet you than I was for my first scene that day."

Y/N smiled, recalling the way Drew had stumbled over his words when he first introduced himself. "You were so serious, but I could see the kindness in your eyes. I knew from that moment that you were different."

Drew tilted his head to rest against hers, his voice soft as he spoke. "And I knew, from the moment you smiled at me, that I wanted to get to know you. I didn’t know then that we’d end up here, but I’m so glad we did."

Y/N looked up at him, her heart swelling with affection. "Me too, Drew. Every step of the way has been worth it, even the hard parts."

They fell into a comfortable silence again, the kind that only comes when two people know each other deeply. Drew’s fingers traced lazy patterns on Y/N’s hand as they sat there, both of them content just to be together.

"Can I tell you something?" Drew asked after a while, his voice hesitant.

"Of course," Y/N replied, lifting her head to look at him.

Drew took a deep breath, his expression turning serious. "I was so nervous before the premiere tonight. Not just because of the film, but because I knew I was going to propose. I kept thinking about all the things that could go wrong, how I might mess it up…"

Y/N smiled, reaching up to gently stroke his cheek. "But you didn’t mess it up, Drew. It was perfect. You were perfect."

Drew’s eyes softened as he looked at her, his heart swelling with love. "You make me feel like I can do anything, Y/N. Even when I’m doubting myself, you’re there to remind me that I’m enough. And I want you to know that I’ll always do the same for you."

Y/N’s eyes welled up with tears again, but she blinked them back, not wanting to cry anymore tonight. "I know you will, Drew. That’s why I said yes."

Drew smiled, leaning in to press a soft kiss to her lips. It was a gentle, tender kiss, full of the love and promises they had just made to each other. When they pulled back, Drew rested his forehead against hers, closing his eyes as he breathed in her familiar scent.

"I love you so much, Y/N," he whispered, his voice thick with emotion.

"I love you too, Drew," Y/N replied, her voice equally soft. "And I can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with you."

They stayed like that for a long time, just holding each other and savoring the moment. The world around them faded away, leaving only the two of them and the love they shared.

Eventually, the cool night air began to settle in, and Y/N shivered slightly. Drew noticed and immediately shrugged off his jacket, draping it over her shoulders.

"Thank you," Y/N murmured, snuggling into the warmth of his jacket.

Drew smiled, his eyes crinkling at the corners. "Anything for you."

They got up and slowly made their way back to their hotel, the city of Venice quiet and peaceful around them. When they reached their room, Drew held the door open for Y/N, and she walked in, turning to watch as he closed the door behind them.

As soon as the door clicked shut, Drew pulled Y/N into his arms, holding her close. "I don’t think I’ll ever get tired of holding you," he murmured into her hair.

Y/N smiled, wrapping her arms around his waist. "Good, because I’m not planning on letting you go."

They stood there in the middle of the room, holding each other as the reality of the night finally settled in. They were engaged. They were going to spend the rest of their lives together.

"I’m the luckiest man in the world," Drew whispered, his voice filled with awe.

Y/N pulled back slightly to look at him, her eyes shining with love. "And I’m the luckiest woman."

Drew leaned down to kiss her again, this time with more passion, more urgency. The kiss deepened quickly, and before they knew it, they were tangled up in each other, their bodies pressed together as they stumbled toward the bed.

Drew’s hands roamed over Y/N’s body, memorizing every curve, every inch of her. Y/N’s fingers threaded through his hair, pulling him closer as she kissed him back with just as much fervor.

When they finally broke apart, both of them were breathing heavily, their foreheads pressed together as they tried to catch their breath.

"I love you," Drew said again, his voice filled with so much emotion it made Y/N’s heart skip a beat.

"I love you too," Y/N replied, her voice just as breathless.

They spent the rest of the night wrapped up in each other, whispering sweet nothings and making promises for the future. They talked about their wedding, their dreams, and the life they were going to build together. And when they finally fell asleep, it was with their arms around each other, their hearts full of love and contentment.

The next morning, the sun streamed through the windows, casting a warm glow over the room. Drew woke up first, his eyes slowly opening to find Y/N still asleep beside him. She looked so peaceful, her hair splayed out on the pillow, her lips slightly parted.

Drew smiled, his heart swelling with love as he watched her. He reached out to gently brush a strand of hair away from her face, his fingers lingering on her cheek.

Y/N stirred slightly at his touch, her eyes fluttering open. When she saw Drew watching her, she smiled sleepily, her heart skipping a beat at the look of pure adoration in his eyes.

"Good morning," she whispered, her voice still heavy with sleep.

"Good morning, beautiful," Drew replied, leaning down to press a soft kiss to her lips.

They stayed in bed for a while, just enjoying each other’s presence and the quiet of the morning. Eventually, they got up and got ready for the day, but the magic of the night before still lingered in the air.

As they walked hand in hand through the streets of Venice, Drew couldn’t help but feel like he was walking on air. Everything felt perfect, from the way the sun warmed his skin to the way Y/N’s hand fit perfectly in his.

They spent the day exploring the city, visiting the famous landmarks and indulging in the local cuisine. But no matter where they went or what they did, Drew’s mind kept drifting back to the fact that Y/N was now his fiancée. The thought filled him with a sense of joy and excitement that he had never felt before.

At one point, they found themselves back at the square where Drew had proposed the night before. They sat down on the same bench, the memory of the proposal still fresh in their minds.

"Last night feels like a dream," Y/N said softly, her eyes reflecting the soft light of the afternoon.

Drew smiled, reaching out to take her hand. "A beautiful dream."

Y/N turned to look at him, her expression serious. "Do you think this will last? This feeling?"

Drew’s smile softened as he looked into her eyes. "I think it will, as long as we keep choosing each other every day. Love isn’t just a feeling, it’s a choice. And I’m choosing you, Y/N. Every day, for the rest of my life."

Y/N’s heart swelled with emotion, and she squeezed his hand tightly. "I’m choosing you too, Drew. Always."

They sat there for a while longer, just enjoying the moment and the quiet understanding that had settled between them. They didn’t need to say anything more; their love spoke for itself.

As the sun began to set, casting a golden glow over the city, Drew and Y/N made their way back to their hotel, their hearts full of love and contentment. They knew that their journey together was just beginning, and that there would be challenges ahead. But they also knew that as long as they had each other, they could face anything that came their way.

That night, as they lay in bed, their bodies intertwined and their hearts beating in sync, Drew whispered into the darkness, "I can’t wait to marry you."

Y/N smiled, her eyes closed as she drifted off to sleep. "I can’t wait either."

And with that, they both fell asleep, knowing that they had found something truly special in each other. Something that would last a lifetime.

[sturnioz]

i imagine the first kiss between fratboy!chris and shy!reader was her sitting beside chris who’s counting cash and she’s just admiring him when she felt a sudden need to feel his lips and without thinking twice her body acted on it leaning in and giving him a soft and small kiss to his lips but then she realises what she did her cheeks turning red panic filled her and she quickly jumped up from the couch and ran out of the room meanwhile chris is there like “ what… “ his mouth open from shock.

I can’t write to save my life but i tried explaining the scene in my head as best as i can lmao

oh my god not me just only realising that fratboy!chris and shy!reader haven't kissed yet lol. also i changed the req up just a bit to match their dynamic..

you're sitting on the couch with your knees tucked to your chest, resting your chin on top of them, absently twisting a loose thread on your fluffy socks. chris sits next to you, leaning forward, posture rigid with his elbows digging into his thighs. his jaw is set, and his eyebrows are pulled together in concentration as he counts the crumpled dollar bills in his hand.

you can't help but watch his facial expressions — how his tongue pokes out slightly in concentration. how he mutters numbers under his breath, tone low and rough, followed by the occasional sniff as he rubs the bridge of his nose before he places the stack down on the coffee table and counting another.

there's always that tingly feeling in the pit of your stomach when you see him in his element, and your cheeks burn when you hear him sharply curse under his breath, making snide comments about how he's been underpaid by a buyer. he throws the money onto the table with a scoff, shaking his head, his tongue prodding against his cheek.

his eyes flit to you for a moment, and his eyebrow raises in a challenging way as he bluntly asks, "what? what you starin' at? y'makin' me all jittery, kid. stop it."

"m'just watching..." you mumble softly, a frown tugging at your lips. your gaze drops to your finger, still wrapped around the cotton thread on your sock, before you look back at him. "who... who underpaid you?"

"some dumb blonde from last night. s'got nothin' to do with you anyway, yeah? don't worry about it. go... go watch the tv or somethin'..." chris turns his head back to the money, muttering under his breath. "fuckin' begged me to put this on 'n you're not even watchin' it."

you make a noise under your breath, a small huff, and you turn your head to look at the tv screen. but the moment you do, you find your gaze drifting back to him.

you continue staring at him, more closely than before, feeling those little thoughts swirl around in your mind. you wonder what it would be like to casually thread your fingers through his tousled hair without having it between your thighs. you wondered what it would be like sliding up next to him, clinging to his arm without any reason, feeling him pressed against your side. the thoughts send a flutter through you, a mix of longing and shyness.

but then there's the thought that makes you heart race the most; what it would feel like to actually kiss him. it takes your breath away a little, and you wonder if he would ever want to do something like that with you — even if he does everything else.

for the first time in your life, you decide to push yourself beyond your comfort zone. you take a deep breath, feeling your heart race as you move closer to him, your plush lips puckered and ready to meet his. but just as you lean in, you're startled when chris jolts back, his eyebrows knitting together in confusion.

"what the fuck are you doin'?" his bluntness and harsh tone hit you like a cold splash of water, sending you reeling back into the couch cushions. your face grows hot, the heat creeping up your neck uncomfortable as you retreat, a pout forming on your lips. "you... you tryin' to kiss me, kid?"

you're so embarrassed, and you'd be more than happy if the couch opened up and swallowed you whole. you can't even bring yourself to look him in the eyes anymore, your fingers nervously tugging at the sleeves of his oversized sweater that you're wearing, feeling the tears of humiliation well up in your eyes.

chris stares at you, analysing your facial expression. then, with an exaggerated roll of his eyes and a scoff, he reaches out, gripping your cheeks between his fingers. he pulls you forward, closing the space between you with one swift motion as he slots his lips to yours in a kiss that's anything but gentle.

your eyes are wide in shock, stunned by the unexpected movement. you're lost in the moment, your thoughts scattering like leaves in the wind as chris' mouth moves against yours, firm and demanding. but as quickly as it began, he pulls away, pushing your head back slightly.

"fuckin' happy now?" he asks, shaking his head at your stunned expression. "jesus, kid. always fuckin' poutin' to get what you want... pisses me off."

© STURNIOZ

[frostdayz]

More than enemies

Genre: Enemies to Lovers

aemond x reader (aemond uncle and y/n niece!!) (f! reader)

summary: Y/n is Rhaenyra's only daughter and at a young age she is betrothed to her uncle to keep the peace between the two families. Years pass without seeing each other, but when the day of the wedding arrives feelings are changed and emotions are spilled.

Note: Laptops on 3% so this was super rushed and tbh idk if i like it. Anyways this might be my last HOTD post for a while (I might be lying to myself)

· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ·

My wedding day. I stand before a mirror, the silver and red gown draped elegantly over my form, my mother's house colors blending with those of House Targaryen. My heart races, not with excitement, but with apprehension.

Aemond Targaryen. My betrothed. My enemy. The boy I had loathed for as long as I could remember. Our union was meant to be a symbol of peace between our families, a bridge over troubled waters. But to me, it had always felt like a shackle.

I had not seen Aemond in years, not since we were children. He had been sent away to train, and I had remained in Dragonstone, under my mother's watchful eye. Now, as I prepare to meet him again, I wonder if he has changed. If I have changed.

The door creaks open, and my mother enters, her face soft with maternal concern. "Are you ready, my daughter?" she asks, her voice gentle.

I nod, though my heart is anything but steady. "As ready as I'll ever be, Mother."

She takes my hand, squeezing it reassuringly. "This union is important for the realm. But more than that, it is a chance for you to find happiness." She smiles at me.

Happiness. The word seems foreign in the context of my impending marriage to Aemond. But I nod again, forcing a smile. "I understand." I sigh.

With a final kiss on my forehead, she leads me to the great hall. The steps we leave behind sound out an echo that leads me to my new and unwanting future. The doors swing open, and I step inside, my eyes scanning the crowd until they land on him. Aemond. He stands tall, his silver hair gleaming, his eye patch adding an air of mystery. Our gazes lock, and for a moment, the world falls away.

He looks dare I say different? Stronger. More confident. And in his remaining eye, I see something I had not expected. Curiosity. Apprehension. Perhaps even a hint of regret. Regret for all the torment he gave me when I was a child. Or regret going through with this wedding and not running away while he had the chance?

Without my mind wanting to my feet start to walk me down the aisle, my mind races with memories of our childhood. The arguments, the insults, the constant competition. Does he still feel the same all these years later?

I reach the altar, and he takes my hand. His grip is firm, but not harsh. I look up at him, searching his face for any sign of the boy I had despised. Instead, I find a man who looks at me with wonder and uncertainty. Something I didn't expect to find, my eyes linger on his face confused with the feeling that's starting to stir inside my stomach.

The ceremony passes in a blur, words exchanged, vows made. And then, it is done. We are married. Bound together by duty and destiny.

Later, at the feast, I find a moment to escape the throng of well-wishers and slip into one of the halls in the keep, seeking comfort in the quiet lit hall. Moments later, I hear footsteps behind me. I turn around and find myself face-to-face with my now-new husband.

"May I join you?" he asks, his voice devoid of the arrogance I had once associated with him. He takes a few shy steps forward as if he is scared that I will reject him.

I give a small nod, and he steps beside me, his gaze fixed on me the whole time. For a while, we walk in silence, the tension between us palpable. Finally, he speaks.

"I never wanted this," he admits, his voice soft. "I never wanted to be bound by duty to someone who hated me." He stops his steps and looks away from my gaze.

"I never wanted it either," I reply, my own voice tinged with bitterness. "But here we are." I take a step forward so I am now standing right in front of him, he lifts his head to look at me, his expression earnest. "Perhaps... perhaps we were wrong about each other. Perhaps there is more to us than the hatred we clung to as children."

I look up at him towering over me, searching his face for any sign of deceit. But all I see is sincerity. "Do you really believe that?" My eyes softening

He nods, taking my hand in his and looking down fiddling with the rings on my hand. "I do. And I think... I know I would like to try. To see if we can be more than enemies."

My heart skips a beat at his words. Could it be possible? Could the years of animosity have been a mask for something deeper, something neither of us had been ready to acknowledge?

"I would like that too," I whisper, feeling a weight lift from my shoulders. I take my hand out of his grasp and lift it up to graze his right cheek. I wouldn't in a million years think that I would be open to the thought of falling for the man I once hated.

He smiles and leans his head into my palm planting a soft kiss. "Then let us start anew, my wife. Let us find out who we truly are, together."

I feel a spark of hope. Perhaps this union, born of duty, could become something more. Something real. And for the first time, I see Aemond not as my enemy, but as my partner, my equal, and perhaps, one day, my love and the father of my future children.

[fictionalsweethearts]

A CHILD FOR ZAUN | SEVIKA X READER | ARCANE

Synopsis: Under pressure from the Council and with a heavy responsibility on her shoulders, Sevika decides to have a child with her wife to show her commitment with the cause. However, indirect methods are too risky and she ends up choosing the traditional way, being an equal part spectator and participant.

Contains: mention of pregnancy, threesome, male participation, voyeurism, breeding kink, wife!Sevika, dirty talking, jealousy (I could keep going).

MINORS DNI

Note: Alright, so this is some kinky ass shit, I admit, so if you're not into male participation you can enjoy my other works on my masterlist. If you're staying... enjoy.

“A child?” Sevika asked, her eyebrows knitting together at Shoola’s sudden proposition. The councilor had waited until the session had adjourned and the rest of the councilors had left to discuss this with Sevika.

The work at the council seemed endless; since the war with Noxus and all the havoc it caused—from half of Piltover in ruins, to hundreds of casualties, widowed wives an husbands, orphaned children, and protests and riots on the bridge due to Zaun’s refusal to actively collaborate with the other side of the bridge—Sevika had barely had time to make amends and command a plan of action to favor Zaun in this whole mess. She was chosen by her people to represent a city whose fate hung in the balance. There were internal disputes, the districts seemed to want to take sides in the war and attack Piltover now that it has weakened, but Sevika knew that this would cost her authority and the promise to finally include Zaun in the Council's plans and stop being marginalized from public discussion. There were sessions and sessions of disputes and long speeches, where Sevika was ignored or the problems she brought up were disregarded by the rest of the members; by everyone of course, except for Shoola and Caitlyn. Both knew the importance of including Zaun, of making its needs known, even if in the past Sevika had been the enemy, or vice versa.

"A child," Shoola insisted, professional as ever. "You're in a difficult position, you don't yet have the trust nor approval of the rest of the Council. They don't know who they're dealing with."

"How a child would make them see me differently?" Inquired Sevika, both hands on the table before her.

"You must understand that you are rare case by being on the Council and being a Zaunite," Shoola explained. "In the eyes of the others, you are still a threat. The others do not trust you to have a say in matters on this side of the bridge, because they do not know what you are putting at stake."

Sevika clenched her jaw. She was a Zaunite at Piltover's council table, a fish out of water in a world of politics and alliances.

"My loyalty lies with my city, not this side of the bridge."

"Your loyalty will bear no fruit if you are not listened to. You must prove that you are not a mere visitor, Sevika. Committing to the cause means having something to risk."

"And what do you suggest, Shoola? A Zaunite child to hold as a bargaining chip? A token that ensures our cooperation?"

"Not a token, but a proof. A proof that you're not just advocating for your own interests..." she said, her tone growing more serious. "But for those of someone you care about, and the Council can see that you do so."

"Isn't the whole city of Zaun proof enough?" She inquired.

"It's about making yourself seen, Sevika," Shoola insisted. "The rest of the Councillors have entire nations behind them; children, parents, countrymen, enemies and allies. Yet you show up here without the full backing of your people, only a small portion who are not related to you in any way other than mere conviction and ideology."

Sevika looked away, Shoola's speech seemwd to acquire more sense with every word. "Besides... a child of your own will keep you grounded, it's a reminder of why you're here and what you're fighting for." She added.

Sevika knew Shoola had a point, no matter how much she hated to admit it. She was a lone wolf in a pack of powerful families and nations, at a disadvantage before an entire lineage of renowned nobles and politicians.

"I understand the need for solidarity," she said through gritted teeth. "But a child isn't a toy to be used for political gain. I won't endanger a child just to prove a point."

Shoola's expression softened, she interlaced her fingers. "It's a necessary decision, Sevika; causes require sacrifices," she said. "There are children waiting for a change there, using one could help dozens, hundreds. You can't keep arguing with a wall."

Sevika stood there in tense silence for a long moment after Shoola left. The room felt more empty than ever. Her mind raced with the idea of being responsible for a child, of being held accountable for their well-being. With a frustrated growl, she slammed her fist down hard onto the table, the sound of her prosthetic arm hitting the wooden top echoed in the room.

"How long am I gonna fight against this?"

┈ ⋞ 〈 ⏣ 〉 ⋟ ┈

"Margot won't allow it." Mumbled Sevika under her breath, letting out a heavy sigh.

Sevika took another drink, stamping the glass on the desk before looking back at the map hanging on the wall. She had been in a resounding silence for twenty minutes, interrupted by her own murmurs and growls. The plan to reduce the coverage of the red light district to favor the construction of hospitals seemed more like a fantasy than a plan, taking into account the powerful influence that brothels and sexual services had in Zaun. Sevika knew that truncating that specific area would be liquidating much of the city's income; she herself, when she used to be a regular customer, could realize how essential the business was.

Suddenly, a couple of arms wrapped around her chest, the softness of your cheek against her back and your smell interrupting Sevika's thoughts.

"You're going to pierce the map if you stare at it for so long, wifey." You purred.

Unconsciously, Sevika's shoulders relaxed as she heard your voice behind her. "It's called strategizing." she said with a half smile.

"What's the deal this time?" You inquired, peeking from your wife's wide back to take a look of the map too.

Sevika's grip on the edge of the desk tightened as her gaze traveled over the map pinned to the wall. She seemed to be studying the layout, her mind working through the challenges and options.

"The Rapturewalk," she replied. "It's becoming problematic. Profits are up, but the city needs hospitals, not more entertainment venues."

"Margot won't allow it." You said, just like Sevika thought before.

She sighed loudly. "I know. But the needs of Zaun are not being met. We're prioritizing profit over basic necessities. People are suffering while Margot makes money."

You ran your hands over her shoulders, your eyes sharpening at the markings on the map before you. "Keeping Rapturewalk is your best card, actually."

"How so?"

"It's a constant and safe source of income, after Shimmer's factories." You argued, crossing your arms as you looked at the map. "Let's say that whores are the economic basis of Zaun, whether you like it or not. And the best way to generate reserves to allocate them to other projects is to take advantage of the profits of the red light district."

It was not the first time you had helped Sevika to unravel a problem of this nature. She used to pay attention to your judgment as much as the councilmen's and she trusted your vision as much as her own.

Between pouts, jokes and a kiss on her cheek, you proposed possible solutions. Sevika responded with a grunt, dragging on her cigarette before looking at the map again. "I've only been on the Council for three months… and I'm going crazy already."

"Take the mining and taxes thing as advice only," you said. "I'm just the wife, the final decision is up to you."

"Don't say that." she said firmly, walking up to you and gently grasping your arm. "You're my partner, in every sense of the word." she stated, placing a kiss on your forehead.

And the truth is that your role in Sevika's life was not limited to just being a wife. From the beginning you were a pillar for her when she didn't believe in pillars or in the need to seek support from other people, you showed her that asking for help was not a sign of weakness but of strength, although to this day it was still a bad habit of hers to swallow her problems until she vomited them out between complaints and a few days of drunkenness. That night was no exception, and as soon as you moved away from her, you noticed her staring at your abdomen longer than usual.

"Is something wrong?" you asked.

"No, nothing's wrong." she grunted, knowing she was lying.

"You sure?"

Sevika remained silent for a moment, her tone sobering. "How does children sound to you?"

You seemed speechless for a moment.

You raised your eyebrows and a flash of excitement crossed your face before you turned serious. “Sounds like something we never considered possible…”

"I know we've never discussed it. But the thought has crossed my mind a few times... I never thought it would be an option, given our circumstances. But then again, I never thought we could have a life together in a room above a poker den either."

"I, uh..." you stuttered. "It's a sort of fantasy of mine, actually." you admitted. "You always said you weren't interested in children, and I respect it."

"Well, things has changed, haven't they?" Sevika took a step closer. "We've changed."

But something wasn't fitting, and you sensed it. "Sev. Why are you suggesting this all of sudden?"

She took a deep breath, her hand dropping back to her side.

"The Council has been... making suggestions," she said. "They think it would be a... symbolic gesture. A way to bridge the gap between Zaun and Piltover."

And all clicked.

"So you want a heir, not a son." you stated.

"No, I want what's best for Zaun. And if having a child serves a greater purpose, then that's what I must do."

"A child for a purpose? A symbol." you spat, crossing your arms as the anger began blooming. "Are you trying to please those snobs? Who made you think a heir would change their vision towards you, or towards Zaun?"

"It's about making them respect us. Showing them that Zaun can play the game they set and still come out on top. Sometimes sacrifices have to be made for the greater good."

"Haven't you done enough sacrifices?" you insisted. "Following Vander, then Silco's cause, then Jinx. You've sacrificed what you are every damn time and they still believe it's not enough?"

"What choice do I have?" she snapped back. "If I don't show them, if I don't do something significant, they'll continue to disregard Zaun."

"And using a child is the proper way to earn approval?"

"Babe, it's about respect!" she snapped at you, followed by a sigh when she noticed you flinched.

Silence, thick as fog, settled in the room. Sevika looked not only exhausted, but hopeless. She was making drastic decisions and she knew it. "Love… I don't expect your approval in this, just your support."

You reached out, cupping her cheek as she looked into your eyes, speaking with them. You couldn't stand against that look, you never could. "I'll think about it." you whispered. "But I want you to understand that if we have a child, I will treat him as a son first and as a political tool second."

"I understand." she nodded. "I swear I do."

As the days went by, while the Council gave no respite and neither did Zaun, Sevika planted the seed of a child in your mind frequently. She would talk to you about adoption processes when you were cooking, accompanied by a well-placed caress on your back and a kiss on your neck, and then, after making love, she would talk to you about the possibilities of testing fertilization in a laboratory. Usually you limited yourself to nodding or emitting an "mhm", still questioning the changes that a child would mean, not only as a political symbol, but as an addition to the family.

Sevika would be a good mother, no doubt. She took care of Isha for a whole month without even mentioning she cared for her, but she still came to Jinx's lair with treats and toys or gadgets that she bought at the market. She asked you to cook an extra portion for dinner and whenever you asked her why, it was because "she got hungrier lately", knowing well that it was for Isha. And when she finally admitted her affection towards the blue-haired girl, she passed away.

Sevika remained strong for Jinx and for herself, but you found her asleep in the bathtub the day she found out, her eyes swollen and stinking to whiskey.

"I loved that kid," she admitted later, once you were able to get her out of the tub. "Why is everything dying around me, babe?"

That day you promised yourself to be Sevika's anchor, and bring more joy than worries to her life.

“Baby?” you whispered after Sevika turned around. “Do you think we could visit that doctor you mentioned the other day?”

"Dr. Allard? Yeah, we can. Why?"

"We could ask for advice... about the fertilization process."

Sevika rolled over, her eyes pierced into yours. "Do you wanna... try?"

"Yes, I-" you said before Sevika swallowed your words with a kiss.

And she kissed you later that day, as you two waited for the test results. Fertilization using hextech was still in the experimental phase and was certainly based more on theories than successful cases, but you still hoped you were a suitable candidate for the procedure. Sevika held your hand as the doctor entered, her solemn face not indicating good news.

"The preliminary tests show that your body's response to the hextech fertilization process is not as strong as we would have expected. The success rates will be much lower than we had originally suggested..."

It was the formal way of announcing that achieving a baby by that means was not feasible. And Sevika read your disappointed expression while the woman continued explaining technical details that you stopped listening to. Your wife squeezed your hand and wiped the hint of a tear from your eye. "We'll find a way."

And frustration was beginning to overwhelm you and Sevika. You drank at breakfast and dinner, ruminating on the possibilities and pressuring the Zaun orphanage just to find out there wasn't a goddamn orphanage in the first place. A month of arguments, tears and breakdowns went by. The Council gave no respite, Sevika was on the verge of collapse balanced by two cities that refused to cooperate, drowning her anguish in whiskey and smoking her worries, sleeping barely a few hours and giving up her intimacy and quality time with you. You watched Sevika fall into a cycle of slavering work from which you could not get her out until you found her unconscious in the living room, passed out from exhaustion and alcohol.

And that was the last straw.

"I'll look for candidates," you said in bed, after having fed Sevika a substantial dinner and a spoonful of Shimmer. "You can choose the one you like the most."

"And if I say no?" she dared to argue.

"Then you'll quit the Council."

She was silent for a moment, too weak to argue and too tired to find another solution. She couldn't believe she would consent this.

"Fine," she said grudgingly. "You can look."

It took you no more than a week, spreading out a series of files on the living room table and asking Sevika to study each one carefully. The process took barely an hour.

"This one," she said finally, laying the sheet on the table. "It's the most suitable.

You kind of expected it, Misk. A thirty-three-year-old Zaunite in impeccable health; a rarity in a city like ours. He was an athletic man who was both handsome and noble. He was known to run a humanitarian business, providing beds, food, education, and health. A true symbol of the spark of humanity struggling to survive in the city and an indirect ally of Sevika, if she could put it that way. The file was accompanied by a photo of the man in question. He had tanned skin, pale, slanted eyes, a straight nose, and generous lips. His black hair, usually tied back in a half ponytail, was dazzling with silvery glints and vitiligo had paled half of his face, spreading across his left arm and left pectoral. You knew Sevika had chosen him for his unusual features, she had a thing for Zaun's genetic diversity.

"Did you find him handsome?" you dared to tease her.

"Qualified." grunted Sevika. "I could never call a man handsome."

┈ ⋞ 〈 ⏣ 〉 ⋟ ┈

"I won't repeat myself," Sevika said firmly. "We bought your silence, you keep your mouth shut. Whatever happens in this room, stays in this room."

You were sitting on the edge of the bed, an olive-colored robe as your only garment, your hair loose and your skin soft and smooth from the scented bath you took earlier. The room smelled of floral, penetrating honey, while the lights were dim and invited to retreat and intimacy.

You had prepared the room in advance for the special night; cigars lay on the coffee table in front of the wide bed with silky damask sheets. Three glasses of whiskey with ice, a jug of water, poppy oil beside the bed, aromatic herbs hung from the ceiling and a series of candles spread across the furniture and the windowsill, through which the silver bath of moonlight filtered in. You looked at Sevika, clad in a wine-colored kimono, revealing a glimpse of her bare chest and long, shapely legs. Her hair loose and her mechanical arm gleaming with Shimmer. Certainly her feminine energy was taking more prominence tonight, and you couldn't help but finding her even more beautiful.

Sitting on the couch, Misk watched Sevika intently, sipping whiskey and taking orders with the abnegation of a soldier. He had a robe on and his hair tied in a ponytail. He was more handsome in person and when Sevika first watched him walk in, she let out a chuckle. "He looks like a puppy."

"Sevika."

"He'll act like a puppy, alright."

Misk greeted you and your wife cordially, acknowledging the reasons why he was there and taking a seat on the sofa.

"This is not about your pleasure, but about the purpose. You will do as I say." continued Sevika. "You will touch my wife only when I allow it, and you will not speak unless spoken to. Understood?"

"Yes, ma'am."

"C'mere." she commanded, watching Misk stand up and come closer.

Sevika wrinkled her nose, blowing smoke into Misk's face as she studied his bearing, his face, and his scent. She parted his lips with her fingers, taking a look of his teeth and then his eyeballs, looking for any indication that would cast doubt on his medical certificate. He smelled healthy. "You're in good shape," she said, cupping the young man's jaw to look at his angles as if he was a rare animal.

Certainly for Sevika he was, she only adresses men for gambling, business or brawls. The sole thought of sharing a bed with him was uncanny still. "My wife chose well."

She ran her hand down his throat, feeling his pulse, which felt strong and steady. "Have you been in a threesome before, young man?" inquired Sevika with a dark grin.

"I have." nodded Misk.

"Good, I'm not into teaching men what they have to do." said Sevika, letting his throat go. "No funny business or I'll rip your cock off."

"Sevi." you protested from the bed.

Sevika grinned, her eyes flickering to you. "My wife seems to have a soft spot for you," she said. "Don't push your luck, then."

Misk nodded, his expression serious. "I understand."

"You're scaring him, babe." you insisted.

"He has no reason to be scared," she said shortly. "If he behaves, he'll be rewarded. If he doesn't, he'll remember it for a long time. He also signed a contract, remember? He knows what's he getting into."

Just then, Sevika seemed convinced enought to start.

“Take a seat and watch,” Sevika ordered, leaning over to stub out her cigarette in the ashtray. “You’ll join when I say so.”

You stood up, ready and eager as Sevika approached you with confident steps. She caressed your cheek. "Are you sure you're okay with him watching?" you whispered softly. "He can enter later."

"Let him stay. He can learn a thing ot two."

┈ ⋞ 〈 ⏣ 〉 ⋟ ┈

You squeezed your tits between your fingers, Sevika gave you a slow and methodical oral, she ate you out with all her heart and her whole face, diving between your legs and moaning against your pussy. She took all the time in the world on it, making you shudder and whimper for relief, only for your wife to straddle you on her thigh and order you to ride her as soon as you reached your first orgasm. You refused her nothing, even when Misk was on the couch watching everything and made you shy for a moment. But Sevika gave two shits about his presence, urgently kissing your mouth, whispering obscenities that only she was capable of saying and pinching your nipples between her fingers.

Misk realized that he was in front of an experienced couple, totally in tune.

"Don't look at him," she murmured. "Eyes on me, baby. I'm the one you're riding right now."

Sevika kissed you hard, filling all your senses so that you wouldn't even consider looking at a man while you were with her. She didn't take pleasure in letting a man possess you, not now or ever, but she couldn't deny that she was attracted to your pitiful moans and the way your lips would part when Misk fucked you. Sevika knew that this encounter wasn't just for a particular purpose, it was pleasurable in equal parts and she was certainly spoiling you by consenting to it.

"Admit it." whispered Sevika. "Admit that you're dying for him to fuck you. That you're dying to be the center of attention."

"No, Sev..." you whimpered.

Sevika grabbed your throat and looked into your eyes. "You're an attention seeker, even in three years of marriage that hasn't changed. And I love how desperate you are."

"Ah." that's all you could do, pant. "Ah, ah..." and your eyes softened before Sevika let your throat go and you cried your orgasm out.

You fell on top of her. Sevika cupped your neck with a tenderness she only stored for you and placed a kiss on the top of your head. "You're not allowed to be tired," she whispered to you. "Misk is still watching."

You asked for water, Misk was the one who handed you the glass and while you drank, Sevika drew circles on your back. She looked at Misk with analytical, wary eyes, knowing that the unpostponable could not be postponed.

With a kiss on the top of your head, she made you descend from her lap and wait on the bed, still a little shaken by the two previous orgasms. Misk remained in place, Sevika reached for a cigarette on the coffee table and lit it solemnly.

"Misk." she said. "Take good care of her."

You swallowed, still not believing that Sevika was giving you over to a man. A rush of adrenaline and anticipation ran through your body when Misk nodded, looking at you lying on the bed. You stood up, bare and glowing still, allowing him to come closer.

"Can I…?" he asked, clearly afraid of angering Sevika with the slightest contact on your body.

"Yes." you whispered, allowing him to wrap his hands around your waist and kiss you.

Sevika drowned her jealousy in her cigarette, watching as Misk laid you down on the bed and ventured into your skin, your breasts and your abdomen. His touch was gentle, you appreciated it since your wife had left you quite sensitive after her intervention, but you couldn't stop looking at her while he rubbed you between your legs.

You needed her close, not to be removed from the equation.

Sevika read your thoughts clearly, sitting on the couch, the tip of her cigarette glowing with each drag before she placed it on the ashtray. “Stand up,” she ordered, to which Misk seemed to back away. “I didn’t say you were leaving.”

Misk seemed to understand, allowing Sevika to position herself behind you, cupping your breasts in both hands as she began to kiss your neck. You greeted Misk with another long kiss, feeling more secure with your wife’s close supervision. Only then you moaned opnely with pleasure, parting your legs so Misk could once again rub a sensitive but so wet pussy that it left his fingers with a wet sheen.

With your wife's intervention, the evening flowed (very) well. You were already sitting on the bed, leaning against your wife's chest who was already easing a couple of fingers in you, while Misk was busy pleasing your nipples with his tongue. You moaned, looking at your wife and giving her a short kiss before looking at Misk again. The man seemed engrossed in his task, his robe sliding enought to reveal his chest and the paleness of the vitiligo. You thought he was handsome, an ideal candidate for a beautiful baby.

However, you didn't allow yourself to look at him for too long, knowing that provoking Sevika's jealousy would probably end with a dead man in the room.

"I wanna eat you out." you whined then, cupping your wife's cheek.

"Aren't you busy enough?" she teased.

"Please..."

Sevika wasn't going to deny you anything either, she loved to indulge you in everything. Not in vain she was allowing a man on her bed. Still, she hadn't pay attention to him, much less touched him; he was there as a mere tool, she insisted. Sevika tangled her fingers in your hair, her palm firm on the back of your neck as she watched you trail kisses from her chest to her pubis. She hissed, Misk kneeling behind you and kissing your spine slowly. She felt the urge to break his nose with a punch, but you kept her busy with your mouth between her legs.

“Fuck.” She growled, looking at you. “If it wasn’t for you…” she added in a whisper.

"Mhm." you moaned, venturing to ease a finger into her. And Sevika's anger was soon replaced by a stronger feeling.

You gasped, noticing the presence of his phallus, hard and wet against your entrance. Your body bristled in anticipation, believing yourself ready to receive Misk. Sevika frowned, her hand between your locks clenching tightly. Her blood boiled.

"You hurt her and I swear I'll rip your cock off," she threatened, not caring if she was ruining the mood or not. She only cared to know that her wife was willing to continue.

"It's fine." you purred, pulling back to look at Sevika. "I'm... I'm ready."

Your hands on either side of her hips, you watched Sevika the entire time. You didn’t look away from her grey eyes, not when Misk rubbed against you, not when you arched your back to allow him in. Sevika sucked in a breath between her teeth, holding your chin when your lips parted in a shaky moan.

“Fuck.” you breathed out, kissing your wife as Misk buried himself in you.

And you were embarrassed by how fucking horny you were.

You didn't know how to put your pleasure into anything but moans, words fell short. The feeling of kissing your wife, her hand around your throat while you were being fucked was delicious. Being the center of attention turned you on like nothing else, the moans, the grunts, the obscenities that reached your ears and made you smile. You soon agreed with what Sevika had said before; you love attention. The clash of skin on skin filled the room, Misk held your waist and squeezed your skin while Sevika caressed your lower lip, watching you, almost admiring you.

"Seems you're having fun." she said against your mouth. "Breaking into moans for a man, aren't you ashamed?"

"So ashamed." you whined before Misk leaned to place a kiss on your shoulder and you read Sevika's jealousy in her eyes. "But you love watching."

"I love you." she whispered, only your ears catching such strong phrase.

You lost count of how many times you gasped, or how many times Misk made you shiver with a precise thrust. Your wife watched everything, absolutely everything, scolded and admired you in equal parts, finished smoking her cigarette and gave you a tobacco-flavored kiss before forcing you upright.

"You're already all wasted, I thought I taught you better than that." she said, gripping your chin as your eyes fluttered with exhaustation. Misk had a firm hand on your shoulder, making slower but deeper thrusts. You felt him fill you again and again, causing a slight numbing sensation in your pussy.

You were reaching your limit.

Misk let out a groan, his breathing becoming irregular and noisy. "I take this is how men let you know they're about to cum?" asked Sevika with a raised eyebrow.

"Sev." you whimpered. "I'm..."

You didn't know if you were about to cum or faint, whichever came first, but it worried Sevika. You weren't used to this amount of stimulation and Misk seemed insatiably focused on his task. It was then that Sevika kissed you and left the bed. Your chest hit the mattress, Misk growled against your ear and his hips moved incessantly, to the point that you felt imprisoned by his body. You wanted to cry, it was an unknown pleasure and your body gave signs of wanting to give up.

Until you felt it, like a warm, wet torrent that made its way inside you and filled your insides. It was then that you stifled a cry into the pillow, Misk didn't seem to stop.

"I told you to take care of her, son of a bitch," Sevika said.

Misk stopped dead at the cold touch of a cannon against his temple. "You get away from her right now or I'll shoot you in the balls, you hear?"

You didn't see Misk leave the room, but you heard him. You were lying on that bed, your legs shaking, a thread of his seed seeping between your legs. Until Sevika made you close them.

"Relax, it's all over now…" your wife whispered, sitting next to you and placing a kiss on your shoulder. "I shouldn't have agreed to this in the first place."

"I'm fine…" you murmured. Exhausted and sore, you couldn't deny that you'd never felt this pleased in bed. It wasn't Misk the important addition, it was the dynamic of being watched by your wife and realizing the desire that prevailed in her gaze.

Well, desire until she seemed to kill Misk at the last minute very appealing.

"Keep them closed, sweetheart. I won't let this happen again, either you get pregnant or I set the Council on fire. You won't go through this again."

You looked up, glancing at Sevika beside you on the bed. She covered you with her kimono, tracing circles on your lower back before frowning. “Tell me the truth.”

“Mhm?”

“You fancy Misk, don’t you?”

“You already said it, Sev. It’s suitable, but I don’t like him.” you smiled despite your exhaustion, leaning over to place a hand on your wife’s knee. “I just want to give you a child, Sevika. I want to be and make you a mother.”

“You’ll look beautiful pregnant.” Sevika whispered. "So damn beautiful, round and glowing. I wonder how I got myself such gorgeous wife."

"I wonder the same..." you smiled and Sevika leaned down to give you a kiss before patting your bottom lovingly.

“I’ll run you a bath and dinner, okay? Get some rest.”

You nodded, rolling over to lean back on the soft pillows of your bed as you watched Sevika get dressed.

"Are you gonna kill him?" you asked after a moment.

"I wanted to." she admitted. "But I have too many things to attend to add murder to the list. As long as he doesn't cross my path on the street, I won't try anything."

"Okay..." you mumbled, watching Sevika leave the room. "Love you."

"Love you more."

You sighed, tired and sore, barely processing the situation that took place in that same bed you were laying on. You had never been in a threesome, and it was a good but unrepeatable experience. You stared at the ceiling for a moment, wishing with all your might that this method would work and that you could have a child for Zaun.

But above all, a child for your wife Sevika.

[rhiannonsknife]

could I put in a request for Lucy MacLean x Wasteland!reader? you both find shelter and you usually take first watch because you’re used to staying up late. Except Lucy has a habit of making your job harder than it has to be because she just starts yapping and won’t go to sleep right away. Take yesterday night for example, you underestimated her ability to run out of things to talk to you about and you lost about 2-3 hours of sleep because of it. Tonight, Lucy’s about 15 minutes into her yap session when you randomly ask her if she wants to have sex, she’s delighted at the idea and agrees. You wanna tire this woman out, what’s a more efficient method than giving her a few orgasms? (maybe even include this being Lucy’s first time being eaten out?)

── GUILTY PLEASURE

— summary: lucy won’t stop talking.

— warnings: kind of inexperienced!lucy. fem!reader. nsfw content. mdni. this took me a month to edit but here we are.

the shelter you’d stumbled upon earlier isn’t much. it’s hardly anything at all: half a roof, crumbling walls, and a faint musty smell.

still, it seemed better than sleeping under the open sky where god knows what could catch you off guard. so, you decide to settle yourself near the door, leaning against the wall with your weapon in easy reach. first watch, as always.

and, as always, lucy is making it harder than it needs to be.

she’s sprawled on her bedroll a few feet away, her head propped on her pack like a makeshift pillow. the dim glow of the dying embers between you throws flickering shadows across her face, as she talks.

“-and, i mean, who even puts that much trust in a filtration system, you know?” she says, her tone exasperated. “it’s like, sure, the overseers say it’ll last forever, but what happens when the pipes get clogged? no backup system, no-“

you pinch the bridge of your nose, cutting her off before she can spiral any further into whatever story she’s telling you from her life in vault 33. “lucy-“

“what?”

“i thought we agreed you’d try to sleep during my watch!”

“we did,” she says, shifting to rest on her elbows now . never a good sign. “but you’re awake anyway, so it’s not like i’m interrupting anything. besides, you’re terrible at keeping yourself entertained. i’m doing you a favor!”

you give her a flat look. “i don’t need ‘to be entertained’. i need quiet!”

lucy scoffs. “quiet seems overrated. besides, what if something sneaks up on you? you’ll want me awake to watch your back.”

“that’s literally my job right now,” you deadpan, gesturing toward what once was a door.

“okay, fair,” she says with a shrug. “but what if you fall asleep? then we’re both screwed!”

you let your head fall back against the wall with a soft thud, staring at the cracked ceiling. “lucy, if i fall asleep, it’ll be because you spent all night talking about pipes and filtration systems instead of letting me do my job and i’ve bored myself to death!”

“i’m just saying, vault-tec could’ve planned better” lucy goes on after a short pause, like you’ve never asked her to stop at all. “like, one person on maintenance for an entire level? no wonder the water tasted weird that day!”

this has been your dynamic ever since you met her: lucy talking your ear off, filling the silence with anything and everything that comes to her mind.

“do you ever stop?” you ask, arching an eyebrow at her.

“not really,” lucy says, grinning. “another thing,” she leans forward slightly. “i get why you’re all about this ‘quiet’ thing, but maybe you’d actually enjoy these little watch shifts if you talked more. or, you know, let me help you stay awake!”

you scoff. “help me stay awake?”

“yeah,” she says. “like conversations, or games, or- i don’t know, literally anything but sitting there staring into the darkness like some broody protagonist in a bad holotape!”

“you’re unbelievable.” you laugh, despite yourself.

she beams, triumphant, and leans back again, her hands clasped behind her head. “you’re welcome.”

the wasteland beyond the door feels vast and empty, the moonlight barely illuminating the cracked ground and jagged ruins. you focus on the shadows, your grip tightening slightly on your rifle. lucy’s voice continues behind you, her words blending into the ambient hum of the night.

another ten minutes of this pass, your patience wearing thinner with every syllable; your initial plan to just wait for her to get sleepy doesn’t seem to be working.

“if i had been in charge of the vault party planning committee, there’s no way they would’ve run out that fast” she’s currently recalling. “it’s simple logistics. one crate for every-“

“lucy,” you interject, your voice flat.

“what?”

“are you ever going to go to sleep?”

“eventually,” she says with a shrug. “it’s not like i’m bothering you, right?”

you sigh, defeated. “you are absolutely bothering me,”

she ignores that completely, her tone turning thoughtful. “it’s kinda nice, though, isn’t it? i talk, you listen, we bond. i mean, sure, you don’t say much, but that’s probably because you’re so fascinated by what i have to say-“

“lucy…”

“-which i get! not everyone grew up in a vault, so my perspective is pretty-“

“lucy!”

she finally pauses. “yes?”

you turn fully, leaning your shoulder against the wall as you cross your arms. “do you want to have sex?”

the words hang in the air for a beat, and for once, lucy falls completely silent. you watch as her face cycles through surprise, confusion, and delight in rapid succession.

“wait, what?” she asks, already sitting up. “do i- are you serious?”

you shrug, trying to look nonchalant despite the heat creeping up your neck. “you’re not gonna sleep, and you’re definitely not gonna let me do my thing. i figure if i wear you out, i might actually get some peace and quiet tonight,”

lucy blinks at you, and then, once you’re fairly sure she will turn the insane offer down, she grins.

you‘ve thought about it before. not about sex, necessarily, but tamer things: you found yourself staring at lucy in the rare moments when she wasn’t chatting away, eyes studying her features whenever she hadn’t been looking your way. you thought about kissing her, too, about her body against yours and-

well, perhaps you had thought about sex with her.

you never figured out what vault dwellers like her learned about sex down there. only that, presumably, she does seem to know what you’re on about, judging by her enthusiasm.

“this is the best thing you’ve suggested so far,” she says, already tossing aside her blanket and crossing the small room to stand beside you.

lucy lingers above you for a moment, her eyes scanning over you as if weighing her next move. she takes her time. when she finally lowers herself into your lap, it’s with purpose, every movement measured. her weight presses into your thighs, grounding you in place, while her palms rest on your shoulders. lucy’s thumbs gently trace circles on your skin through your clothes as her eyes search yours.

to your surprise, you are the first to falter under her gaze, something lucy so clearly relishes. a satisfied glint flickers in her eyes just before her hands glide up, fingers curling around your jaw as she cups your face. without warning, she tilts your head back, guiding your gaze to hers again, brushing absently over the corner of your lips.

“don’t look away now,” she murmurs, a teasing rasp, her breath ghosting over your skin.

her thumb and forefinger catch your chin, holding it firmly as she hovers there, close, her lips parting ever so slightly as if to speak.

just when you think you can’t stand it any longer, lucy finally leans in.

her lips meet yours, soft at first, almost tentative, like she's waiting for some kind of reaction. she grazes the sides of your face, memorizing the feel of you beneath her touch. the kiss deepens quickly, the tension from earlier bleeding away into something much softer, more urgent.

her confidence only falters when she first tries to grind down against your pelvis, searching for a friction you cannot provide. you’re not sure what she had expected, or if she’s moving on instinct, but this is when it seems to sink in that lucy is in no position to fully take the lead here.

“are you a virgin?” you blurt at her puzzled expression.

“no!” lucy says, shaking her head. “no, it’s not- i got married remember…?” she grimaces, recalling the events that had followed her rather short lived ‘marriage’ in vault 33.

“okay, so…” you start. “what’s going on here, then?”

“i-” her gaze flicks between you and some point over your shoulder. her cheeks flush. “i just- well, you know, it’s not that different, right?”

“lucy…” your voice softens, even as you fight back a laugh. “do you actually know what you’re doing?”

“yes!” she says immediately, too quickly. then she hesitates. “well…sort of?”

you give her a look, and her face crumples into a sheepish grimace.“okay, fine, no,” lucy admits, throwing her hands up in defeat. “but i wasn’t going to say that out loud! i thought i could just…figure it out as we went.”

you sigh, though there’s no real annoyance in it. “you’ve been with someone before. why didn’t you-”

“because it’s different!” she interrupts, her voice rising again. “i mean, for one thing, he wasn’t…” she waves her hand vaguely in your direction, her words trailing off like she’s afraid to finish the thought.

“a woman?” you supply.

“yes, exactly,” lucy nods. then, as if to clarify: “not that that’s bad! it’s just- i don’t really know what i’m supposed to- how i’m supposed to…” her voice fades again, and she presses her lips together, clearly frustrated with herself.

“lucy,” you say gently, drawing her attention back to you. “it’s not something you’re supposed to just know. especially if…” you pause, hesitant to touch on something that might sting. “especially if it wasn’t…encouraged where you grew up,”

she frowns, her brows pulling together. “yeah, well, vault 33 wasn’t exactly a…bastion of sexual enlightenment! marriage, reproduction, carrying on the bloodline…i suppose it was always about the next generation, never about- this!”

lucy sighs.

“and, look,” her words come in a rush now, like she’s determined to explain everything before you can judge her. “it’s not like i have a problem with it! i mean, clearly, i don’t, because we’re, uh, doing…whatever this is. i just…i guess i thought it’d be easier to figure out!”

you reach up to tuck a strand of her hair behind her ear. all your previous annoyance has melted away, replaced by a need to show her that this -sex- could be about so much more than just reproduction. “you don’t have to figure it out all at once, you know. we’ve got time!”

lucy’s gaze meets yours, hesitant but hopeful. “we do?”

“yeah,” you say softly, your fingers lingering against her cheek. “you don’t have to take the lead here, either. just…trust me, okay?”

“okay,” she says quietly. “okay, i trust you,”

“good,” you lean up, brushing your lips against hers, slow and careful. her shoulders relax immediately, and when she kisses you back, it’s sweeter than before: less frantic, more curious, like she’s letting herself feel everything for the first time.

you kiss her slowly at first, moving your lips in sync with lucy’s. she’s following your lead now, letting you set the pace of your mouths. she still seems as eager though, and when she starts moving her hips again, you’re prepared:

instead of your pelvis, you maneuver her so that she’s grinding on your thigh, finally giving her access to the friction she’d been searching for.

“o-oh-“ lucy mewls softly, her head lulling back as she ruts against you for a little while. you can feel the warmth radiating from between her legs already, damp through the fabric of her suit.

taking it off will be a risk, of course: stripping naked would make a quick escape damn near impossible. but you decide that, as you feel her arousal drag over your leg, lucy maclean is worth every risky decision that might come with it.

so, as she moves against you, as high-pitched moans start spilling from her throat, you reach for the zipper of the blue suit. it parts smoothly, the soft scraping of the interlocking metal echoing in the otherwise quiet space.

you look up at lucy, only vaguely aware of the white bralette that comes into view now that you’re unzipping her clothes.

you don’t want to make her uncomfortable by blatantly staring but the skin that’s revealed to you makes it impossibly hard. so, instead, you choose another way to show off your appreciation: without tearing your eyes from hers, you lean in and press your mouth to the flesh between her collarbones, then move lower.

lucy gasps, her lips parted and her brows slightly furrowed. it’s her who peels the sleeves of her jumpsuit from her arms, who lets it pool by her hips and reaches for you all over again. who urges you closer by the back of your head with one hand, while the other grabs the hem of her underwear.

“wow,” you gasp, dumbfounded when lucy -your lucy- tugs the bra upwards enough to free her bare chest from the restrictive fabric. she smiles, shyly, and tilts her head.

her nails sink into your shoulder the second your mouth closes around her nipple; she’s responsive there, more than you ever were, more than you thought she’d be. so responsive that lucy starts moving her hips more frantic when you roll her other nipple between your index and thumb.

and still…”more,” she whines softly, greedily, dragging her soaked center across your flexed muscle. “i want you to touch me,” she breathes. “please”

you trail slow, open mouthed kisses down her torso, your hands gliding over the curve of her back. you press lower, as far as you can reach, until your neck twists at an almost painful angle and lucy's hand finds the back of your head, cradling it gently.

that’s when you shift, moving her body so she’s leaning against the wall and you’re positioned between her spread legs.

lucy watches you through curious eyes, studying your every move as you get to kiss down her body more comfortably. you hold the eye contact, despite the need to stare at her chest (her nipples still hard and wet with your spit) until you have to pull the zipper lower and peel the fabric from her legs.

you slide it off and tuck it beneath her, allowing lucy to rest on it rather than the dirty floor, leaving her in a pair of panties matching the white bralette.

lucy’s body shudders as you kiss back up the expanse of her legs, the muscles in her thighs tensing. obviously, you don’t stop there: you crawl up further and further until you’re almost at the apex, reaching for the waistline of the underwear and-

her legs clamp together suddenly, forcing you back.

“what-“ lucy stammers, unsure. “what are you doing?”

“i was gonna-“ you lick your lips, dropping your hands to her hips. of course lucy has no idea what you were going to do. “can i-“ you consider your words, unsure how to explain it so she’ll understand. “-put my mouth there?”

lucy’s eyes widen. “you want to-”

“please,” you whisper. “please, can i eat you out?”

lucy -her own want betraying her- whines, her hips jerking towards your mouth. from here, between her legs, you can see the wet patch of arousal that has soaked through her underwear.

“okay,” she pants, nodding frantically. “okay, yes. please!”

immediately, you reach out, hook your fingers underneath them and pull the panties down her thighs. you take your time making sure to securely place them in one of the suit’s pockets so they won’t get dirty, before finally turning your gaze back to lucy, who’s waiting in anticipation.

she lets you take in the sight with a nervous look on her face, biting the side of her index.

your fingertips absentmindedly trace the skin, watching the way lucy’s body parts for you. she is beautiful, endlessly beautiful, glistening with arousal, and framed by coarse hair.

“i’m sorry, i should’ve-“ she begins, but you immediately hush her.

“you’re beautiful,”

lucy inhales breathlessly, her fingers forming a v-shape and spreading herself open for you to see.

“fuck-“ you mutter under your breath. lucy’s clit is throbbing.

slowly, you make your way up her thigh. in response, lucy buries her fingers in your hair, sighs softly as she invites you in, and spreads her legs wider.

you nudge her skin with your nose, nipping on the tender flesh.

the first time you put your mouth on lucy, her legs close around your head. her jaw goes slack and her brows furrow in concentration, adjusting to the new sensation.

you start with featherlight kisses to her swollen clit, each making her buck her hips against your face.

“o-oh!” lucy stammers from above, looking almost confused, surprised by how good your lips feel as they brush over her. “that feels so good,” she breathes finally, her body rolling down against your tongue.

“yeah?” you murmur, soothingly wrapping your arms around her thighs to hold her open as you circle her clit with the tip of your tongue.

“mhm,” lucy nods, but it comes out more like a whine at a particular good press of your lips. just as lucy buries her fingers in your hair, seemingly wanting to push you closer, you push her apart and lick a broad stroke right through her, getting your first actual taste.

instinctively, your eyes roll back, the lewd moan that rips from your throat drowned out by her skin.

“g-god-“ she stutters. “that’s- ah- good.”

unbeknownst to lucy, the sweet praise goes straight to your center. if you had a pillow, or anything useful around, you’d shove it between your legs and grind on it while you eat her out.

but, regardless of your own lack of relief, her words encourage you to lick deeper, to move faster inside of her and show her all that she’s been missing out on. you alternate between fucking your tongue into her, and wrapping your lips around her clit to suck on it, all while lucy pulls your closer, guiding your tongue to where she needs it the most.

you gladly let her, ignoring the occasional sting of your scalp at sharper tugs.

for a while, you eat lucy out like that, getting lost in each of her desperate attempts to stifle her sighs and her taste in your mouth. her words have morphed into muffled babbles above you, incoherent sounds of pleasure.

it doesn’t take long at all until she is getting closer: her head has lulled back against her bag, her moans come out more ragged and breathless, and the leg she has thrown over your shoulder trembles with tension as she pushes her heel down on your spine to urge you closer.

instead of teasing lucy, you go right for it.

your lips close around her clit again, just as two of your fingers sink into her. squirming above you, lucy mindlessly grinds her hips to your face, aching for that release. she chants little ‘ah, ah, ah’ sounds, her cunt tightening around your fingers so much it’s hard for you to thrust them in and out of her.

both your nose and your chin are covered in lucy’s wetness, glistening in the dimly lit space as her hands curl to fists in your hair.

“i feel…” she begins, trailing off. you’re not sure she knows what she’s feeling. or maybe she’s in disbelief because you only have your hands and mouth to use on her and still it’s enough.

either way, you encourage her, putting your thumb in place of your lips, rubbing her clit with the wet pad of your finger to keep her on the edge. “that’s it,” you mumble.

lucy chokes on her noise of approval and just nods her head instead. “yes,” she whispers, over and over, like a prayer. “yes, yes, yes! i’m gonna-“

that’s all of a warning you get before her whole body tenses. her lips are parted in a silent scream, her hips jerk forward once more before it all comes crashing down on lucy. the sound she makes is somewhat between a cry and a moan of your name and she arches her back from the ground when she cums.

you manage to tear your gaze away from her convulsing cunt to catch a glimpse of her, so lost in the haze of her pleasure: lucy’s eyes are shut tightly, her head thrown back so much that the entire expanse of her neck is on display for you.

her walls tighten around your fingers, trying to suck you in deeper, to keep you in place while she trembles with the force of the orgasm she’s riding out on you.

only when her body has stopped shaking, you lean back, not wanting to push her too far. she’s already given you more than enough.

“phew,” lucy says once she’s caught her breath. it’s so ridiculously lucy you have to bite back a laugh. “is it- is it always like this?” she asks by the time you’ve crawled back up her body and slumped down by her side.

you reach for her, not even thinking about it properly until you’re already cradling her face, your thumb grazing over her jaw soothingly. lucy doesn’t seem to mind.

“no,” you manage quietly, taking in her features in the dark. “no, it’s never been like this.”

luct turns her head to look at you, her expression open. she’s still flushed, her hair mussed, her lips kiss-swollen, and she’s smiling.

“i liked it,” she says, voice hushed. then, as if realizing how simple that sounds, she rushes to clarify: “not just because of- well, you know…but because it was you!”

you swallow hard, caught off guard by the sincerity in her voice. “yeah?”

lucy nods, shifting so she’s curled against your side, her fingers idly tracing patterns against your arm. “yeah.” a beat passes, then: “i think i wanna do that again. like…a lot.”

you laugh outright at that, tilting your head to press a kiss to her temple. “you really are something else, maclean.”

she hums, pleased, before shifting closer, tucking herself against you like she belongs there. you don’t realize how quiet it’s gotten until lucy is fast asleep in your arms.

[ragingbookdragon]

Veils of Gold

Royal AU! Knight!Simon Ghost Riley x Queen!Reader

Word Count: 1.1K Warnings: None

Author's Note: Knight Simon being completely down to his knees for his Queen is something I hold dear in my heart

**********************************************************************

It was piss poor luck on his part that the archer had spectacularly good aim and got to him before John or Kyle could. The arrow hit the soft part of his armor in the back of his knee, sinking through and out the side, hitting against the inside of his steel armor. Instantly, he felt the coursing of some type of poison as he went to his good knee, cursing and reaching back for his bad knee. He watched through the corner of his visor as John’s claymore bit into the archer’s shoulder and cleaved halfway through his torso before he dropped.

John ran to him, dropping his sword down as he knelt. “How bad is it?” he asked, prodding the wound and watching as crimson stained through the brown leather of his glove.

“Bad,” Simon said. “Poisoned.”

“Shite. Captain!”

Jonathan sprinted over, sheathing his own sword as he lifted two fingers to his mouth and whistled for his horse. “John, help him onto the horse and lead him back to the castle. Kyle, you and I will continue to scout out the rest of the enemies.”

“Yes sir,” he replied, pulling another arrow, and nocking it.

“I can still fight,” Simon griped, pushing himself up to his feet; he reached behind and yanked the arrow out, only letting out a very nasty grunt of pain. “I’m fine.”

“You’re not fine and you’ll do as I command,” Jonathan replied, pointing to the horse. “You’re in no condition to fight. You’ll either get yourself or all of us killed.”

“Cap—”

“That’s an order, Knight Lieutenant.”

Jonathan voice booked no room for an argument and Simon acquiesced as he hobbled over to the horse, though he knocked John’s hands away as he pulled himself up on the horse.

“I’ll scout ahead,” John muttered, pulling out his bow. “Will you be okay until we—”

“I’ll be fine,” Simon griped, pulling the reins of the horse. “Let’s go.”

***

Effectively, the last thing Simon remembered was crossing the bridge into town, panting like a dog before he toppled sideways into the freezing water below. All he could think was how nice it felt seeping under his armor and flooding over his heated skin.

***

Dripping echoed in his ears, a throbbing settled between them as pain pulsed through his skull and shot down to his leg. He grimaced, cracking an eye open, expecting to see the wooden ceiling of the Knight’s lodging but instead was greeted with a gilded golden mosaic encrusted with gemstones and marble. It took him a moment before he realized where and whose room he was in—the Queen’s.

Another drip sounded and he turned his head along the silk pillow, watching as a veiled figure dipped their hands into the water basin in the corner of the room; a woman, by the shape of their figure and it was only until they turned with a wet rag that he realized it was her.

She wore a white and gold, sleeveless gown that dipped lower in the front than he liked it too, but she looked the portrait of heraldry, especially with the golden veil that circled her hair like a halo and down her back. Slits in the side of her white dress showed her legs as she walked, and he watched her gold sandal, adorned feet with each step until she sat down on the bed beside him. Gently, she laid the rag on his forehead and touched his cheek.

“Your servants will talk,” he whispered, practically delirious and unable to tear his eyes from the sight of the gold sewn into the bodice of her dress and up where it collared by her neck and shoulders. “They will know.”

Her hum was heaven’s music as she pulled the sheet away from his leg and gently went about cleaning his wound again.

His stomach dropped when he saw crimson on her hands and his shot out, grasping her wrists. “Stop. Stop touching me.”

“Simon?” she appeared shocked, not that he had grabbed her so tightly but that his voice seemed on the verge of hysterics.

“My blood,” he breathed. “I am not worthy enough to have bled onto your clean hands.”

“Then you are also not worthy to have my white gown wipe away the sweat and grime too,” she said, all the while, rubbing the end of her dress along his knee, slicking it with dirt, sweat, and blood.

“My Queen,” he begged. “Please, I am unclean. I am too stained for your purity. I—”

“You will lie as your Queen commands and be healed under her hands,” she interrupted, giving him a stare that would have withered a lesser man.

Simon swallowed his words, a tightness in his chest as he watched her dip her dress into the jug of water next to the nightstand and begin anew, wiping his wound.

“I am unworthy of such pure grace,” he whispered, and she smiled, her eyes soft and gentle.

“You are a foolish man,” she murmured, pouring a thick looking greenish liquid into the wound before she wrapped it. “A man I admire greatly, but a foolish one all the same.”

He felt his breathing stutter in his lungs when her hands drifted up his wrapped knee to the inside of his thigh, then to his hip, where she caressed the sharp bone beneath his skin before she bent down and kissed it. “My Queen,” he groaned, feeling her lips turn upwards against his pale skin; he felt his chest flush with a pale redness at the intimacy. If anyone saw—“Please, have mercy upon me…” he pleaded. “Should anyone see you in such a compromised position…”

“You are such a worrier,” she sighed, sitting up; her hand rested upon his cheek before it gently threaded into the hair at the side of his head. “The door to my quarters is locked. No one can come in.”

Simon gazed at her, lovesick and feverish. “I do not wish for your reputation to be tainted as mine has been. You are too good for it.”

She ignored him and leaned forward, pressing her lips to his. “You are loved by the most powerful woman this side of the land. You hold more power over me and my resolve than any law ever will.”

He whimpered into her and reached up, touching the veil she wore. “I yet still believe that one touch from your hallowed form will free me from all I have done.”

“Should it not, you know I would walk beside you in hell until we have.”

“I am not worthy,” he murmured, and she quieted him.

“Hush, you are the most.”

[dixons-sunshine]

Cleansing The Mind, The Soul And The Body | Daryl Dixon x Fem!Reader

*GIF credits to @reedusmcbridedaily.*

Summary: Getting Daryl to take a shower or a bath when he wasn't in the mood was never easy. It took a lot of skillful convincing and even some bribery. Luckily, as his wife, all it took was a batting of your eyelashes and he was putty in your hands—and you took this to your advantage.

Genre: Fluff.

Era: Alexandria; post Saviour arc, pre the building of the bridge.

Warnings: Swearing, mentions of past abuse, Daryl's scars.

Word count: 1.6k

A/n: A fic born from this idea by @louifaith. Hope you like this! This was originally supposed to be a 500 word blurb but I got carried away lol.

➳༻❀✿❀༺➳

The sun was almost completely gone from the sky. The first stars of the night sky were twinkling brightly outside the window of the bathroom in your shared home with Daryl, and the calming, cool breeze was flowing in through the slightly open window. The water was starting to fill up the bathtub, and you meticulously added just enough bubble bath liquid you had found on a run a few weeks prior.

Behind you, Daryl was reluctantly slowly undressing himself, carelessly tossing his shirt into the laundry hamper. He was grumbling to himself under his breath, making you laugh lightly.

“Whatever you want to say, you can say it to my face, Dixon,” you joked, turning the faucet off and turning around to face your half naked husband.

Daryl rolled his eyes and shook his head. “Nothin',” he answered, slowly stepping out of his jeans and boxers and walking over to the bathtub and settling into the bubbly water. “Let's just get this fuckin' over with already.”

You chuckled affectionately, settling onto your knees beside the bathtub and bringing a hand up to brush through his hair. Even though the archer didn't admit it, the warm water of the bathtub was soothing the aches in his body. And your soft hand gently threading through his hair had him practically melting into the water. Despite originally being against the idea of having you bathe him, insisting that he wasn't a little kid and he didn't need someone cleaning him, if he was already so content with just your hand in his hair, he didn't even want to know how relaxed he'd feel if you were to gently wash him.

Daryl subconsciously leaned into your touch and let out a small, content sigh, eliciting a light laugh from you. “Relaxed? I thought you didn't want this. Didn't you say that you "didn't need to be babied" and that "this would be a waste of time"?”

Daryl grumbled under his breath, lightly swatting your hand away. “Shut up,” he mumbled, trying to hide how his lips twitched up into a smile.

You giggled and leaned over the bathtub, catching his lips for a quick, tender kiss, before pulling away again. “Okay, handsome. What first? Body or hair?”

“Hair,” Daryl replied slowly, suddenly feeling hyper aware of the fact that he was naked and vulnerable in front of your eyes.

You nodded and carefully got to work on his hair, wetting it and carefully applying shampoo, working it into his hair while lightly scratching his scalp. “I love your hair. Long hair really suits you.”

“Yeah?” he asked, looking at you.

“Yeah. It compliments your features perfectly. I love it.”

Daryl closed his eyes and basked in the caring, loving moment. However, he couldn't help the nervousness that creeped up on him. The scars on his body were on full display, but luckily the ones on his back were hidden from your view for now. He chastised himself for feeling so insecure about his scars—you were his partner for two years before you became his wife a couple of months prior, and a loyal companion and friend for two years before that, dating all the way back to the quarry. You were well aware of his scars and about his father's abuse, and always worshipped him and reassured him that his scars were nothing to be ashamed of, but that didn't stop his insecurity from creeping up from time to time.

And what should've been a loving, tender moment could potentially be ruined by his insecurity.

While applying the conditioner to his hair, you noticed his now opened eyes staring ahead at the wall, his eyebrows furrowed together as he subconsciously crossed his arms over his chest, right over his scars. You instantly knew what was going through his mind, and you took it on yourself to lift his spirits.

You gently cupped his cheek with one of your hands, prompting him to look at you. His beautiful, ocean coloured eyes locked with your eyes, and you could clearly see the turmoil within their beautiful depths. It made your heart ache to know that someone caused the man you loved so much harm. If his father was still alive, Daryl wouldn't have had to worry about a confrontation with him. No, you would've given the man a taste of his own cruel medicine and after that, you would've killed him.

“Baby,” you whispered softly. “Have I ever told you how beautiful you are?”

Daryl could feel a blush creep up onto his cheeks. He scoffed and ducked his head, letting his wet hair fall in front of his eyes. “Stop,” he mumbled, but he couldn't help the small smile that crept up onto his face.

You giggled and tucked his hair behind his ears. “You are! You're so beautiful, Daryl. I can't believe how lucky I got with you. I won't be surprised if every woman here has a crush on you. Well, except Tara, but other than her...”

“Nah,” he denied and shook his head in disagreement. “Ain't no woman who would give me the time of day 'cept ya. 'Sides, even if there were, I ain't need no other woman. I already have the perfect one.”

You smiled and leaned over for another kiss, this one lasting longer than the previous one. You pulled back with a soft laugh, admiring the man who you'd come to love above everything else.

“And you swear on your life that you're not a romantic. That last line was smooth, Dixon,” you mused, grabbing the soap bar that smelled like lavender and turned back to the archer. “Is this okay?” you asked, motioning to his body.

Daryl's heart swelled at your thoughtfulness. You never wanted to do something that would make him uncomfortable, and he appreciated you for that. Nobody understood him quite like you did.

“Yeah, s'fine,” he replied with a nod, pushing that nagging voice in the back of his mind away. You loved him, every part of him. If you didn't, you would've run for the hills a long time ago. You weren't freaked out by his scars. You loved him for him, scars and all, and he'd be damned if he let his self deprecating thoughts ruin a good, loving moment.

The two of you remained in a comfortable silence for a few minutes while you continued to wash his body. However, when he slowly sat forward so that you could wash his back, you broke the serene silence with your loving, soft whispers.

“You're so strong, Dar,” you whispered, gently tracing your soapy fingers over his scars. An involuntary shiver traveled across Daryl's spine, eliciting a small giggle from you. “You're a warrior. You've been fighting to live the life you deserve even before the dead started rising. You've been surviving for far longer than most of us. That makes you so fucking brave, baby. And I know you don't feel like it, but you deserved to be loved, and you are loved. Rick loves you. Michonne loves you. Carol, Maggie, Rosita, Aaron, all of them. But I can assure you, nobody loves you as much as I do. I've never loved anyone as much as I love you. I'd die for you. I'd kill for you. I'd do anything for you.”

Daryl inhaled sharply. He swallowed hard, willing the lump in his throat to go away. Hearing that from you was exactly what he needed in that moment. He knew it would be a long journey for him until he actually believed he was worthy of love, worthy of your love, but with you by his side, he knew he'd get there eventually.

“I love ya,” he whispered, staring into your eyes to let you know he meant it. He truly did love you. Nothing could ever change that.

“I love you too,” you answered with a smile, gently rinsing the soap from his back before grabbing the handheld showerhead and instructing him to lean his head back. You carefully rinsed the conditioner from his hair, bringing an end to the bath time.

You grabbed a towel and shook it out, using it to dry your husband. He looked at you in amusement but allowed you to do so, not-so-secretly enjoying the attention you were giving him. You then grabbed the fresh pair of boxers and handed it to him, as well as a pair of flannel pants. He got dressed in them and turned back at you.

“Lift your arms,” you instructed, watching the man lift an eyebrow at you but complying nonetheless. You helped him slip his shirt on, and after he was dressed, you wrapped your arms around him and nuzzled your face into his clothed chest.

Daryl wasted no time in returning the hug. He tightly wrapped his arms around you, placing a kiss to the top of your head before resting his chin there. He gently rocked you from side to side.

“Dar?” you whispered, catching his attention.

“Hm?”

“Do you wanna cuddle?”

“Mhm.”

“You wanna be the little spoon?” you asked, giggling as Daryl's arms tightened around you. You already knew what the answer was without him having to say anything. “C'mon. Let's go to bed, handsome.”

[aemondapologistfrfr]

A Way Out

benji x targtower!fem!reader 

Summary: You’ve only wanted to be free with the wind for as long as you can remember. You know war is coming and you make an attempt to flee and seek the future you want. When it all comes crumbling down madness is the only thing left to comfort you. 

Warnings: 18+ vulgar language, wine, depression, panic and anxiety attacks, thoughts of wanting to die, mention of sex, pregnancy, birth, kidnapping, poison, mention of death, death/suicide(reader), alicent not being a mother, other targtower children appearances, slight timeline au but the dance is still there, mention of war 

Authors Note: a request from @chainsawsangel - the most angsty thing i’ve ever written! literally the main song in my head and that i played while writing this was Please Please Please Let Me Get What I Want by The Smiths so idk !

Word Count: 8.7k  

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A Year Before

Over the years your mother and grandfather have slowly taken hold of the Iron Throne. You’ve watched the rapid decline of your fathers health and he’s been nothing more than a corpse these past couple of moons. Your eldest brother drowns himself in his cups day in and day out while the younger of your two brothers hones himself into a deadly weapon. Your only sister is so closed in on herself that you can barely hold a conversation with her. The only person you can turn to is your mother who should be offering you warm embraces but can seem to only muster a cold shoulder.

You try not to blame her for your poor upbringing and push it onto an unlucky draw from the Gods before entering this world. Many aren’t as lucky as you and your siblings and you try to remind yourself of this. You have never wanted for anything besides maybe love and a true family. The only living thing you feel a genuine connection with is your dragon. He is your only solace in times of distress and the feeling of the wind blowing through your hair causes you to dream of flying off, never to return. There is nothing for you in King's Landing, you’re only a daughter and not even the first. Some days you don’t even feel like a daughter but a painting to be stared at until they tire and walk away.

You weren’t a painting but a song on the wind. Something never to be grasped or locked away. You were made to free and soar on the breeze. The wind would sing back to you in its high pitched tone and promise you the escape you desired. You and your dragon fly higher into the clouds chasing the sound of freedom away from the city below. One day you promise to yourself and your dragon. One day we’ll leave this place for good. For now you settle for disappearing for a day or two in the depths of the Kingswood. 

                                         ᓚᘏᗢ

After drinking the last of your water you decide to relent and make your way back to the dragon pits. You coast above the city before your dragon walks you into his cave. Upon exiting the cold stone halls your mother is waiting for you with her hands folded and a frown etched on her face. 

“Let’s go.” she turns on her heel and you follow behind her to the carriage. She glares at you from across the enclosed space and pinches the bridge of her nose as the carriage comes to another stop. “Stay here.” she’s out of the carriage instantly and the door is snapped shut. You lean back into the seat and groan just wanting to be back in your chambers and alone. 

You start to loosen your riding gear wishing you could just put a night dress on and go to bed. You hear your mothers whispered shouts on the other side of the door before it’s being ripped open. You watch as your mother shoves a stumbling Aegon into the carriage before sealing herself in with you both. He takes the seat next to you and smells worse than he looks. Your mother looks over you both with disgust, mumbling under her breath. 

“The Gods must have been playing a cruel joke on me when they sent you both to me.” she shakes her head, grabbing her Star of the Seven necklace. “You disappear in your cups and whores and you,” she gives you a pointed look. “Disappear to Gods knows where.” she scoffs. 

“Do you wish for me to just sit in the castle until you marry me off?” you snap and Aegon chuckles from beside you. 

“And I sit and wait until you usurp the throne from Rhaenyra?” his throat sounding raw. 

“You two should be more grateful for all that is done for you. When we get back to the Keep you each will go straight to your chambers. I’ll hear no more.” she waves you both off off, turning her head to stare out the window. 

You’ll be grateful when you’re sealed away in your chambers alone. 

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11 Months Before

With the succession in question a war for the throne is inevitable. Ravens have been flying for weeks on end to secure secret alliances for the plotted usurpation. Many Lords and Lady’s have traveled to court to affirm these alliances and the Keep quickly becomes stifling. You can’t take the cramped halls and the constant feasts. You’ve had enough of the continuous parading about and the lunches and teas. Tonight is the night you leave. 

The bag on your shoulder should feel heavy but it feels light as the air itself. You’ve had this planned for some time now you smile as you make it out of the Keeps gates. You slip through the city streets and push off people who try to stop you. You sprint up the Hill of Rhaenys to the dragon pits not caring to look behind you at the life you’re leaving behind. 

The massive opening is dark as you slip in and wait for your eyes to adjust. You start in the familiar direction and rest your hands on the cool stones as you enter the caves. The familiar chuffs bring a smile to your face as you slowly enter the cave. He starts to uncurl and pushes his snout into you. You pat your hands down the length of him before climbing up and attaching your bag. You settle into the saddle and he takes you into the dark skies. 

The moon lights your path as he leads you both west. You lean down and hug against his neck feeling his mighty wing beats. You fly on the breeze for hours until the sun begins to rise and you land in a small forest. You unhook from the saddle and recline back feeling safest still atop your dragon in strange lands. 

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A week has gone by and you’re dangerously low on supplies. You have no idea where you are but you saw a town not too far off when you landed for the day. You pull your bag down from behind the saddle and start to change out of your riding gear. The nearby creek offers you a different hair color that will help you blend in. The mud feels foul in your hair but once it dries you just look like a commoner living on the streets. 

Holding your breath you wait at the edge of the tree line. You walk out and quickly make your way into the thrum of bodies down the main street. You stop at different stalls and pull coins out of your pocket trying to silently replenish your supplies. You move from vendor to vendor quickly trying to take as little time as possible so you can leave this town. Your bag is quickly filled and you turn on your heel to make an exit until a hand is wrapped around your wrist. 

“I make it my business to know all of the people who carry gold coins in my town. You, I’ve never seen before. Who might you be under all of this mud?” you look up at the man looking down at you with dark eyes. You look him over searching for a house symbol or anything that will mark who he is. 

“Let’s just take her back to the castle. Question her.” his company says. You look over this man and see the symbol of the Blackwoods. You know not all of the River Lords swore obeisance to your mother and grandfather but can’t remember if the Blackwoods were allies or not. 

The grip on your arm is sure to leave a bruise as you're pulled through the streets to the castle in the center of the city. Whispers and nods of ‘My Lord’ follow in your wake through the halls. Surely this man isn’t Lord Benjicot he can’t be a day over five and twenty. You study him and he pulls you through a large wooden door. It looks to be his council chambers but before you can look around you’re pushed down into a seat. 

“I’m a generous host when I know who my guest is.” the man sits back in his chair and looks you over. 

“Who might my host be?” you ask softly and he tilts his head. 

“You’re in my town and you don’t even know who I am?” he chuckles. 

“In honesty I don’t even know the town I’m in. Not for certain. From my observations I’m assuming you’re Lord Benjicot?” he squints his eyes at you. 

“Your speech is too fine and your pockets are too deep to be a commoner.” your heart starts to beat faster. “There’s been rumors of a dragon flying about at night and I’m wondering if you would know anything about that, as a traveler of course.” he tilts his head studying you. 

“I have seen no such thing, my Lord.” you shake your head quickly. 

“No? They say a Targaryen Princess is on the run. The Queen will pay well for any information.” your leg starts to shake. “Where do you come from?” he looks to his men and nods them out of the room leaving you both alone. Your chest starts to tighten not knowing what’s about to happen. 

“I’m from everywhere.” your words hushed. 

“Why would a Princess be on the run?” you watch as he rises and pours two glasses of wine. “And why is she all the way at Raventree Hall?” he sets a glass in front of you and takes his seat once more. 

“I don’t know why a Princess would be on the run, my Lord.” you nibble your lip hoping that your denial will work. “If you’re truly housing the Princess I would keep your voice down or alert the Queen at once. These are trying times.” you keep your words hushed and avoid his eye contact. 

“No matter how much mud you put in your hair it can’t dull the lilac of your eyes, Princess.” he sighs, taking a sip. 

“Please,” the word barely audible. “I can’t go back. Please.” your eyes finally meet his and you see the sadness in them.

“Why are you running?” he nods prompting you to talk.

“I want to live a different life.” you scrunch your brows. “I don’t like being a Princess. I think if we lived other lives I must’ve not been very good in them.” you look at him with a half smile. “This life feels like a punishment.” he frowns at your words. “I’m looking for a way out. I can give you all my coin. Anything. Please just don’t sell me back to them.” you wipe away a wayward tear quickly and huff as you spot the look of pity on his face. 

“What kind of Lord would I be if I denied a Princess refuge in her most desperate hour.” he jests but he doesn’t know how true his statement is. “You can stay for as long as you need. Unbeknownst to anybody.” he nods his head. “Should a dragon come at night, we have feed for him.” he offers you the start of a smile. 

“What is your price?” you squint at him not understanding why he would agree to help you. You’ve never known a kind hand to come without a price.

“No price. It is my duty and honor to house you, Princess.” his face starts to soften.  

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10 Months Before 

It’s been just over one month since you’ve settled into Raventree Hall. Lord Benjicot, or Benji as he requests, has stayed true to his word. No Kingsmen have been through here and you’ve remained unfound. You dye your hair once every fortnight and keep to yourself. Your dragon is content enough to coast above the trees and indulge on the meat you bring him. 

Even with time and distance from the Keep you still feel suffocated and watched by it. You feel lost and alone most days but you have no desire to go home. Benji has never made you feel like you must work to earn your keep here but you’ve become stagnant. You don’t feel like you belong here. The people are kind but they don’t truly know you. You’re constantly looking over your shoulder and you dislike dying your hair so often. You miss your silver hair and fine gowns. You want for a home and a family you’ve never had but at least you didn’t feel so utterly alone. 

“How has my home been treating you, Princess?” Benji looks across the dining table at you. He sees the frown sculpted onto your face day in and day out. 

“Very well. Thank you.” you nod and turn all your attention to your plate. You both share three meals a day and he never has anyone else at the table. You can’t help but feel like a burden. Surely you’ve over extended your welcome but he’s too kind to tell you to leave. Gods what if he tells someone where you are. “Though I think it’s time for me to leave.” you set your fork down and he looks at you stunned. 

“As in you wish to retire to your chambers for the night?” he sits up and studies you more intensely. Had something happened that you didn’t tell him about? 

“No, I think,” you nod your head, steeling yourself. “I think I need to go somewhere else. I don’t fit in here. I need something else. I need the wind, I need freedom. I feel stuck and lost.” you can’t help the words that continue to flow out of your mouth and he turns to you listening to everything you have to say. “I don’t belong here. Maybe Essos will call to me. I just need to not be here. Or anywhere.” you look up to him with tear stained cheeks and his heart stops. 

He can tell you’ve been reluctant to open up to him but he can’t very well just let you leave out on your own. Benji decides right then he’ll go anywhere with you. To protect you. To care for you. To listen to you. To be anything you need him to be. He cannot bear the thought of you out there on your own.

“Then I offer you my sword, Princess. Wield me as you need. Allow me to make your journey less dangerous. Take me where you please. I’m yours to command.” your brows scrunch as you wipe away your tears. 

“No.” you shake your head. “I cannot ask that of you. You’re a Lord and have duties and land to attend to.” you don’t even allow yourself to think of the idea of having him travel with you. 

“Is it not my duty as a Lord to assist the royal family in any capacity I can?” he grabs his fork and begins to eat again. “It is not my desire to send you to your death on the road.” you watch his jaw flex. 

“If you come with me, you know we will never be able to come back.” his eyes lock to yours as he nods. “It may even mean your death.” he sets his fork back down and looks at you unyielding. 

“Give me at least a moon to make silent preparations and we’ll leave it all.” he sips his wine. 

“And if my dragon won’t allow you to ride with us?” you sit back in your chair watching him. 

“Then I shall follow you both from the ground. By horse or foot, I care not.” he shrugs. 

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9 Months Before 

You sit across from Benji as he looks over the map on his desk. You two have been trying to find a route that will offer ample coverage for your dragon during the day. You both have gone back and forth about whether to risk going through the Vale and decided it’ll be the quickest. Your only reservation is that it’s so close to Dragonstone but you have plans to travel by night and take extra precautions. 

“We can leave when you want.” Benji looks at you and your eyes snap to him. 

“You’re positive you want to come with?” you still can’t wrap your head around the idea that he genuinely wants to come with. 

“I am.” he nods and rolls the map up and pushes it away from him. 

“Why?” you chew your lip. “Why do you want to come with me?” you start to pick at your nails. “Why do you want to throw your life away for a sad Princess?” your chest tightens and you beg the tears not to come. 

“You’re not the only one who wants to run from something.” his eyes hold the desperation you know all too well. “I don’t see it as throwing my life away. It’s not my desire to see you leave, no matter how selfish that sounds but I know this is no place for you. I,” he shakes his head at battle with himself whether to speak it. “I care for you deeply. More than I should but I would never do anything to cause you harm or displeasure.” his confession settles into your empty heart. He cares for you. 

“I wish to leave tonight, Benji.” you stare at each other in silent agreement and he nods. “I will start packing.” you get up and start to the door and pause. “I care for you too.” the soft confession has Benji staring blankly at the door that softly clicks shut behind you. 

                                         ᓚᘏᗢ

The first week of travel has gone so smoothly and your mind has finally begun to settle. This time on the road you have more than enough supplies and Benji to hunt for you both. The first night when he said you two had to share a tent you blushed profusely and made him make a wall of supplies between the two of you until the chill of the night came. Every night, still with the same blush on your face much to your horror, he waits for you in the makeshift bed with open arms for you to curl into. 

Slowly you’ve started to open up and relax more. Benji has been able to break down your walls and he’s never been more in love with a sound than your laughter. When he wakes up in the early morning to prepare you breakfast he takes the first couple minutes to himself to watch your soft smile as you sleep. He loves when he turns from the fire to be blinded by your silver hair in the sun as you stretch with pink cheeks. At night he relishes how you fight off sleep to talk to him about all of your dreams for the future and your lives once you get to Essos. 

It all started so innocently you just wanted to kiss him. Just once. He didn’t tease you when you told him he was your first kiss he just asked if you would like to be kissed again. After the second kiss it was as if the invisible wall between you two lifted and you became one. When you were with him you felt as if this was the home you were looking for. He was kind and had patience with you and would worship you until you fell asleep. 

The following weeks were some of the happiest times in your life. The days felt never ending and the nights were warm thanks to Benji. You both decided to slow your travel and move at a more leisurely pace as you make your way across the land. Your dragon hunts at night under the shadow of darkness and you begin to feel at ease. Within the next couple of days you both will reach the Vale and begin the last part of your journey in Westeros. 

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8 Months Before 

The Vale’s forests are more dense than either of you two anticipated. It's taken the three of you longer than anticipated but the road has been easy. Your dragon is content to live off of the land and fly in the open skies above the both of you. As of late you’ve been traveling closer to dawn than normal in hopes of being able to reach the coast quicker. 

“By tomorrow we should be in Bravos.” his words are something you’ve been waiting to hear. Your heart is close to bursting. Your freedom is hours away. Once the sun slips under the horizon again you both can make your last flight over Westeros and leave.

“You still want to come with me?” you offer him leave every night. “I wouldn’t blame you if you just told everyone I’m crazy and forced you to take me to the coast.” you nibble your lip with a soft smile.

“I would be the crazy one to leave you here and now.” your smile widens at his words. “I’ve left everything behind for you and I would make that decision again and again.” he grabs your hands. “Whenever we settle in Essos, marry me.” your heart stops. 

“You don’t mean that.” you shake your head.

“I do.” he nods his head with a smile. “Marry me.” he searches your eyes. 

“I will.” you press your lips to his. You pull him into the tent when you hear distant thunder and tangle together in the bed before drifting off for the day.

                                         ᓚᘏᗢ

You start to stir as you hear shuffling around outside. You smile that Benji is up and packing. By tomorrow you both will be in Bravos and planning your next move. You open your eyes and your heart feels as if it’s being ripped out of you as you open your eyes. It wasn’t thunder. How could you be so stupid? So hopeful?

“Please.” the word barely audible as Aemond looks down on you with disgust. “Please let me leave. Brother, please.” you stand clutching the blanket. “I’ll fly to Essos and you’ll never see me again. Please.” you beg as the tears stream down your face. 

“Get dressed and get up.” his eye looks you up and down. “Mother has been waiting for you to come home.” he looks over at a waking Benji before he scoffs and leaves the tent. You grab your dress as you hiccup back a sob.

“What is going on?” he’s sitting up instantly. 

“Aemond is here.” you shake your head. “I knew we shouldn’t have gone through the Vale. Then we lingered here for so long.” you curse yourself for letting yourself get so absentminded. “I can’t go back. Kill me. Please, Benji please. Use your dagger. Anything. Please.” you look around frantically for his blade. Your brother will surely tell your mother of the state he found you in and she won’t take lightly to it.

“I will do no such thing.” he grabs your wrists. “Look at me.” he watches your ragged breathing and eyes scanning around the tent. “We will get dressed and we’ll go together. I’m not leaving you.” you nod your head, unable to stop the constant stream of tears. After hastily dressing he grabs your hand and leads you out of the tent. You are greeted by Aemond, who is there waiting with members of the Kingsguard. 

“Seize him.” Aemond tilts his head at Benji and the guards are pulling him away the next moment. 

“Aemond please.” you plead. “Don’t kill him. Please.” you run to your brother grabbing his arms. “Please.” you sob and he grabs your face. 

“It is not my decision. The council will decide his fate on our return.” you watch as they throw Benji into a covered wagon and start hauling him through the forest. “You’ll ride with me.” he grabs your arm and drags you over to Vhagar. 

                                         ᓚᘏᗢ

You’ve been locked in your chambers for hours. You pace around waiting for your mother to show up. You have no idea what has become of Benji and it’s making you sick. You need air, you need to see Benji. The doors of your chambers open to reveal your mother before they are shut again. 

“You’ve been gone for months and Aemond finds you naked in a tent with a man? In the Vale? And we find out he’s a Blackwood? Gods.” she looks you over with the same disgust you saw in Aemonds eye. “You’ve been sullied no doubt.” your chest tightens as she continues with her ridicule. 

“I love him.” your voice breaks. “We are going to get married.” she chuckles at you. 

“Mm of course.” she rolls her eyes. “You had better hope the moon tea will still work.” you back away from her. 

“I won’t drink it.” you rest your hands on your stomach. “ And if you kill Benji you kill me too. I won’t live. Mother please.” her eyes start to soften as you start to plead. “Please let him stay here with me. Please.” she smooths your hair back and pulls you into her embrace. 

“Why him? I could have found you a nice husband.” she searches your eyes. 

“I want to marry Benji.” she sighs and looks down at you with a frown. “I’ll run away again.” you shake your head pulling away from her. “I’ll take my life. I won’t stay here alone anymore. I can’t. I won’t.” you start to cry again.

“I will see what I can do.” she sighs and leaves you alone in your chambers once more. 

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6 Months Before

In the two months since your arrival back in Kings Landing much had changed. Your mother had allowed Benji to serve as a guard in the castle. She had known not to test your bluff about taking your own life. He was assigned to a night post on the opposite side of the Keep and it was almost impossible to see him. When you got a glimpse of each other in the halls it made everything worth it and the meals you both would indulge in once every fortnight were the only things you were hold on to. 

By the end of your first month back the maester was able to confirm your pregnancy. He urged you to tell your mother and you outright refused. He warrily agreed not to tell the Queen but you both knew it was only a matter of time. When you told Benji the news he cried and held you tightly and promised to take you away. Hours after he whisked you down the halls but as you turned the last corner a handful of guards stopped you both. After that night you have had at least three guards surrounding you at all times when you are outside of your chambers.

You’re not allowed out of your chambers often and most times are when you need to speak with your mother or for family meals. You haven’t seen your father in ages and rumors spread of his rapid decline. Your mother and grandfather have almost complete control of the throne it seems and everyone is holding their breath to see what happens next. The Keep feels colder than it has in years.

You quickly make your way to your mothers chambers to make your final plea of the day when you round the corner and run into Aegon. You take in his flushed cheeks and watery eyes and can tell he just came from where you’re headed. You notice too late he has one hand on your side and the other on your stomach from helping to steady you. Your spine stiffens as you stand up straighter.

“Does mother know?” he searches your eyes, removing his hands from you. 

“No. Please don’t tell her, Aegon. Please.” you plead in a hushed tone.

“You’re almost as much of a disappointment as I am.” he chuckles. “She’ll find out soon enough.” he shakes his head at you.

“But please not by your mouth, brother.” you grab his hand and he nods at you once.

“Well beware,” he nods his head towards our mothers chambers. “She’s in quite the mood.” he shrugs and continues down the hall. 

You pray to the Gods he keeps his mouth shut before you continue on your course to your mothers chambers. You knock quickly on her door and she sighs when she opens the door and sees you. She lets you in and you take a seat on the couch in her solar. 

“What is it?” she takes a seat in the chair across from you. She looks less than pleased to see you and you shrink in her presence.

“Please let me see Benji.” she shuts her eyes at your words and groans.

“Gods I’ve had enough of this. Enough of you and this River Lord. Enough of your brother sullying his name in the streets. I’ve had enough.” she shakes her head and stands up. “If I hear another word about him this week he will no longer be seen by anyone.” your heart drops at her words.

“I-

“No.” she waves you off reclining in her chair. “Leave. Go back to your chambers.” she closes her eyes in dismissal and you rise with a hot face and wet eyes. 

You sprint out of her chambers and down the hall until you’re alone and curled on your bed. You hold the blanket tightly and let out soft sobs so you don’t alert your guards. The door starts to open and you sit up quickly but when you look at the door it’s still shut. You look around your chambers and gasp with a smile as Benji is standing in a doorway in the wall. You stand up and he walks over to you engulfing you in a hug. 

“How? What is this?” you mumble into his chest as you look at the doorway in the wall. 

“Someone sent me to bring you this.” he holds out a ripped piece of parchment and you look at it with scrunched brows.

i wont tell mother

congrats  

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4 Months Before

The maester has kept his word of keeping quiet about your pregnancy and he suspects that you’ll be on the birthing bed in three months. Your handmaidens have proved their loyalty everyday by keeping you draped in large gowns and extra fabric to help conceal your bump. You’re terrified but so excited to bring such a pure light into this world. You know you have to tell your mother soon and you’re dreading her reaction. Benji has been such a solid force for you to lean on and you’re thankful for Aegon showing him the tunnels.

The tunnels have offered you and Benji everything the past two months. He has been staying with you every night and sometimes you pretend you’re both still in the small tent in the forest. You both secretly plan a better life for your child and hide away coin. You both decided to wait until after the babe comes in hopes of easier travel. Lately tensions around the Keep have been rising and it has you on edge.

“What if we just left now anyways. This babe will change everything. I think we should leave.” you grab his hands and look at him with pleading eyes. 

“You are in no condition to travel. We don’t have a destination set. We can wait. It’ll be okay.” he nods and wipes your tears away. “I promise.” you want so badly to trust him but you feel a sense of impending doom.

“I’m scared.” you hiccup back a sob. “Benji, I'm so scared.” he rests his hand on your bump. 

“It’ll be okay. I-“ your chamber doors open and your mother walks in. 

“What is this?” her face crumbles as she looks at you both and the hand on your swollen stomach. “How? You kept this from me?” her expression changes from anger to hurt and then a mix of the two. 

“Mother-

“How could you keep this from me?” she searches your face. “Go to your post, Benjicot.” she straightens her spine as she lifts her chin to him. He turns to you as you begin to cry. “If you do not leave now I will have guards come in and escort you out.” you stand in front of him and look to your mother.

“Please,” you sob. “Please, I love him, mother.” you hold onto his arm.

“Benjicot, leave now.” she raises her chin and stares at Benji. He pulls on his clothes while whispering promises that he will see you tonight. You follow him to the door crying the whole time. He squeezes your hand and slips out of your chambers.

“Mother, please.” you walk to her.

“Who knows?” she looks down her nose at you.

“No one.” you shake your head.

“Doubtful.” she scoffs. “Your handmaidens and at least one maester if you’re this far along. Gods I don’t even know what to do.” she lets out a bitter chuckle and looks up at the ceiling. “Why couldn’t you just have taken the moon tea? I let that pathetic River Lord stay here in exchange for you to drink it.” her eyes are filled with disdain.

“I would never have drank the tea.” you hold your bump protectively. “I love Benji and this child.” you look at her with watery eyes.

“You’re not even married.” she scoffs looking away. “My own daughter having a bastard.” she chuckles. Her harsh words are a shock to your senses.

“I don’t care.” you say exasperated. “Let us leave. Make up a story. I don’t care. I’m obviously not in the right condition for you to pawn me off for your throne so let us go. Please mother. Please we’ll disappear in Essos.” you know this is truly your final plea. Her knowing about your child is the tipping point. 

“No.” she shakes her head. “You’ll remain in your chambers for the remainder of this pregnancy.” your heart sinks as she leaves sealing shut the doors to your chambers with such finality that you feel it in your bones. 

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3 Months Before 

The past month has been absolute agony for you. Benji still manages to find you through the tunnels but only for fleeting moments. You are watched so carefully that you can barely even get out of bed without your handmaidens rushing in. If your mother hadn’t sequestered you to your chambers the maester would have by now from how sunken you’ve become the more swollen your stomach becomes.

You’ve never felt more alone in your entire life. You’ve taken to talking to yourself and the unborn child you carry. The babe has told you that it’s a boy. You tell him stories you remember hearing about Essos and about the wind. He whispers to you at all hours of the day of the childhood he envisions and how he wishes his father could be with you now. I wish he was here.

“I wish he was here too.” you whisper cradling your bump. “One day. One day we’ll all be a family.” the words barely a breath. 

Benji's PoV

Over the past month he’s watched you slowly lose yourself. He doesn’t understand how the Queen could do this to her own child. Someone so pure and sweet. When he enters your chambers for those minutes he holds so dear you look at him as if you don’t see him. Then when your eyes finally uncloud your face drops and you start crying and speaking High Valyrian. 

He wants to take you away from here but he doesn’t know if you’ll make it. You haven’t been yourself since your mother found out and he’s so terrified. He should’ve just gotten you on your dragon in the Vale and let them kill him. He was so selfish for wanting a life with you. 

He blames himself. He should’ve done more. He should’ve gotten you to safety and now you and his child are.. He doesn’t know. He clenches his fist as the tears fall down his cheeks. He wipes them away angrily before taking a deep breath and opening the secret door to your chambers. 

Your PoV

He’s here. The babe whispers into your mind and you smile holding your bump. You look down as if you can see through the layers straight to the babe within. You can’t wait for the day you get to bring him into this world. You hope Benji will be at your side. Gods you miss him. He’s here. 

“My Princess, please,” you know that broken voice. “See me, please.” you blink your eyes and you see Benji standing before you with a hand resting on your cheek. 

“You're here.” a sob racks through your body. “Stay. Stay, please.” you grab onto him and hold him closely. “You’re here.” you whisper into his neck.

“I’m here.” he doesn’t know what to say. He holds you closely and you cling to him. “I’m here. I’m sorry.” he can’t stop his own tears as he holds you closely. 

My father. The babe whispers with happiness. He’s here. You grab Benji's hand and bring it to your bump. You hold each other as the tears flow and he presses a kiss to your forehead before he rises. I don’t want him to leave. Your heart pangs. 

“I love you. I will try to see you again soon.” his smile broken and defeated.

“I love you.” you watch him open the door. “Stay.” you whisper as the door clicks shut behind him. 

“Princess, is everything okay?” a handmaiden opens up your main doors rushing to your side.

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2 Months Before  

You overheard the news from two of your handmaidens who have long thought your mind no longer works. Your father was dead. You weren’t sad at the news. He’s been dead for sometime now. You turn as your chamber doors open. Your mother walks into the room and looks you over. 

“Your father is dead. Aegon will be crowned tomorrow.” you look at her unblinking. “Benjicot is being sent to the wall. You will have this baby next month and you will be married to Lord Lannister shortly after.” you’ve been numb for some time now but her words slam into you.

“I won’t marry him.” you shake your head going to your couch. “We’re leaving.” you hum holding your bump. “Me, Benji, and our son.” you sit down on your chair. “Somewhere it’s always warm.” you offer her a soft smile. “We’re leaving after you join us.” you coo holding your stomach.

“He’s already on his way North.” she sighs, shaking her head. “He’s gone.” she starts walking towards the door. “Pull yourself together by the time Lord Jason comes to court. I won’t have you embarrass me.” the door thuds closed behind her.

He’s gone. He’s gone. You curl into the blankets on your bed as your handmaidens start to clean up your chambers. After lighting the hearth they leave tea on your table and leave you. You stare out the window feeling the tears fall down your cheeks. He’s gone. 

                                         ᓚᘏᗢ

Someone’s here. I don’t care. He’s sad. So am I. He’s crying. You peel your eyes open and Aegon's red eyes greet you as he lays next to you. 

“What has she done to you?” he searches your dead eyes. 

“What of you?” your voice raw as you see the telling indentations across his brow where the crown sat minutes ago. 

“I’ll try to do something.” he whispers and you offer him a tired smile.

“There's nothing to be done. She’s already sent him to the wall.” his watery eyes meet yours. “Besides you offered us so much when you showed Benji those tunnels. I never got to thank you for that.” you brush his hair back.

“I wish I could’ve given you more.” his eyebrows scrunch.

“You’ve given me enough.” you close your eyes and turn back over. You hear him leave and let the world go dark around you once again. We’re alone. We have each other. I miss him. I miss him too. I’ll be with you soon. 

Benji’s PoV

Benji wakes up chained to a wooden bench being carted down the Kings Road. He’s surrounded by common criminals and he tugs on his chains to see if they’re loose. He bangs his head against the wood and the man next to him chuckles. 

“Like we would be that lucky.” the man smirks. “We’re already lucky enough to be going to the wall instead of the gallows.” he shrugs, shutting his eyes.

Benji ignores him and begins to try and form a plan. Why are they sending him to the wall? You’re about to give birth and he won’t be there. Gods he doesn’t know what to do. He should’ve gotten you out. He has to believe he still has a chance to do so. 

He doesn’t know what to do. His heart starts to pump faster and his breathing becomes ragged. He’s being taken from you when you need him the most. He’s terrified of what they’ll do to you in his absence. He needs to get free. He needs to return to you and his child. He needs to.. He needs to.. He needs.. 

“What's wrong with you?” the man next to him mumbles as his vision goes black as he passes out from panic and anxiety.

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1 Month Before

It's time. The voice wakes you along with the immense pressure. You don’t call for anyone as another wave of pain washes through you when you sit up in the dark. You prop yourself up on the pillows and focus on your breathing. I get to meet you soon. A sharp pain tears through you. 

Your teeth dig into your lip as the pressure builds. Your fingers dig into your knees as you spread your legs and begin to push. I’m here. The voice soothes you as you continue in silent anguish. You’re almost there. A small cry comes from you as your son pushes out of you and onto the bed. You scoop him up and bring him to your body. 

He gives out a soft cry and nuzzles against your chest. You’re here. I’m here. You hold him alone in your chambers rocking him and having no care for the after birth or any of the mess and tending to you need. Your child was here. You weren’t alone. He’s here. I’m here. He’s here. I'm not alone.

“Princess.” your handmaidens gasp as they open your door. 

“Oh Gods.” 

“Get the Maester.” 

“Get the Queen.” hurried whispers float around your chambers as you continue to silently rock your son. 

“What’s happened?” your mother bursts into your chambers. “Gods.” she looks at you. “Clean her up.” she walks over and grabs the babe out of your arms. You try to reach for him but she’s out of your chambers and suddenly your son is gone. 

Where are you? I’m here. Where are you? My son. I’m here. Where are you? “Where are you? I’m here. Where are you? I’m here.” screams tear from your body. “Where are you? Where are you?” you call out over and over.

“Princess calm down.” your handmaidens look at you with concern. 

“Where are you?” the maester walks over to you with a cup and pours its contents down your throat. “I’m here. Please, I’m here. Where are..” 

I’m here. 

Please, where are you?

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1 Week Before

Where are you? 

You haven’t seen your son since you’ve given birth to him. The only people you see are your handmaidens and the maester who gives you sleeping drafts. You haven’t seen any of your siblings. Not even your mother. You have no one. No one is coming for you. You’re alone.

Where are you? 

You’re in the tunnels in the dead of night holding a candle stick. The stone bites into the soles of your feet as you climb higher making your way towards the maester’s tower. You softly push on the door and peek in seeing an empty room filled with glass vials and books. 

Where are you?

Your eyes scan over the small glass tubes quickly reading them over. You walk over to the cabinets and continue your search. It has to be in here. A comforting warmth washes over you as your eyes stop. 

Tears of Lys. 

There you are. 

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1 Day Before 

Your mother sits across from you for the first time since she took your son. She mentions nothing of him and instead tells you of your wedding tomorrow. Apparently Lord Jason is here and awaiting your company. You don’t speak or hold her eye contact. You stare at your nails as she continues to tell you what your life is to become. You wince as you dig into the skin around your nail and a droplet of blood appears.

You decide it has to be tonight. You have no idea what the state of the realm is in and have no desire to try and tread through it again. Especially now that you’re all alone. You call out to your son everyday but never get a response. They took your two great loves. You’re alone.

I’m sorry. I’m leaving. I can’t stay. 

Benji’s PoV

Tonight was the first night they didn’t chain him when he slept. After everyone was asleep and the man on the night watch turned he was gone. There’s a month of travel and a war between you both right now but he will do everything to get back to you and your child. He wishes he had a way to get a message to you but it’s impossible.

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1 Hour Before

You sit at a desk with a blank expression and a quivering hand. The ink splatters across the parchment and you scrunch it up and grab a new one. This one is stained with your tears. 

Benjicot and my boy-

I’m sorry. I promised you both freedom and songs of the wind. Instead I’ve ruined everything. 

I will be with you both again in the afterlife. 

-Your wife and your mother

You leave the parchment spread on the desk next to the countless others you attempted to write. Walking to the table that holds your wine feels as if you’re walking across the city. You hold onto the wine with a shaking hand and pour yourself a glass of wine. You pull the vial out of your pocket and empty the entirety of it into your glass of wine. You swirl the red liquid around and down the mixture. You set the glass and vial next to your letter and go lay back on the bed. 

You let out one last exhale before shutting your eyes and calling out one last time.

ততততততততততততততততততততততততততততততততততত

Death 

Where are you?

I will remain here.

ততততততততততততততততততততততততততততততততততত

2 Months After - Benji's PoV 

The one month journey turned into two because of the raging war. The road was hard but all he thought about was you and your child. Gods he misses you so much. He doesn’t know what is waiting for him in Kings Landing but whatever it is he’s taking you both to Essos and starting the life you planned those months ago. No waiting, no excuses. 

                                         ᓚᘏᗢ

Getting into Kings Landing was easier than Benji had thought. He snuck in through the docks and made his way into the Keep through the tunnels. He walked up to your chambers and listened for any sounds. You must be asleep. He opens the door and finds your chambers empty.

No, your chambers look abandoned. Left as they were never to be lived in again. He walks to your desk and sees the letter. The empty vial next to the empty glass. No. No. This isn’t real. No, he won’t accept this. 

“No.” he shakes his head reading it again. “No. Where is she?” he grabs the letter and slips back into the tunnels. Where are you? Where have they hidden you away? This isn’t real. Where are you? Benji’s heart races as he flies down the stairs.

He makes his way down the steps and into the crypts. He won’t believe it. It can’t be. He presses against the wall as he sees someone kneeling on the stone lighting a candle. He waits the couple minutes the woman whispers before she pads away. He continues down the hall and falls to his knees at the lit candles. No. No. His vision blurs as the tears fall.

“I’m sorry.” he chokes out. “I’m here. I’m sorry.” he looks at the date etched on the stone dating two months ago. He was far too late. “I’m sorry.” he grabs for his dagger. “I’m here. I’ll be with you soon.” he brings the tip of the blade to his heart. “I’m sorry.” he lets out a sob.

“Stop.” his head turns at the soft voice. “There’s someone who needs you.” he follows the stranger up the tunnel steps and into the back of the nursery. A small boy with black hair and violet eyes stares up at him. He’s here.

“My boy.” Benji picks him up. “Our son.” he starts to cry. He’s here. 

He turns to thank the stranger but they’re gone. He wraps his son up and packs a bag quickly and leaves out of the Keep through the tunnels. He races to the docks and shoves coin into a shipmate's hand and boards the boat, stowing himself and your son away in the underbelly. They’ll arrive in Essos by the end of the day. Your dream is coming true but you’re not here to see it. He holds your son tighter as his tears start once more. 

As the ship leaves the harbor there is a loud crack heard from the city followed by a roar. Benji looks up and sees your dragon flying above the Blackwater with a chain hanging from his neck. No other dragons come for your dragon and Benji thanks the Gods they were able to get away.

ততততততততততততততততততততততততততততততততততত

4 Months After

Benji sits with his son in the countryside just outside of Volantis. Above your dragon soars on the wind. He’s followed the two of them across Essos and watches over their travel. Benji was worried the dragon would bring too much attention but no trouble has come of it. Your dragon only approached Benji once when they first landed to allow him to remove the chains but since then he keeps his distance. Your dragon seems to be waiting for your son to acknowledge the claim he has placed on him already.  

Benji is thankful for this last gift you’ve given them.

The sun is high and warm as the light breeze flows through the tall grass. 

Faintly, Benji swears he can hear your voice wind.

I’m here. 

ততততততততততততততততততততততততততততততততততত

masterlist 🔌 

um i cried while writing this and while editing and while just thinking abt it xx 

pls take care of yourself bc i know this is a rough topic and there are people out there who care for you and who will answer when you call and there are resources out there if you need them!!

taglist ✍️

@clarityisnofun @gabriella-aesthetic @callsignwidow @llynx7 @violetiss3lfish @ka1afbr @akiko-oo @papichulo120627 @lizzylovebooks280501 @thatgirl101blog @1-fuzzy-squirrels @arya-brooke @ashovertheriver @zanygot7straykidsbonk @moonymoo1 @malfoycassimalfoy @april-notthemonth69 @anaviieiraaa @p45510n4f4shi0n @neocockthotology @thereaderwitch @hardkiddonut @faenyra @hiimava11 @daintylittlesunflower @primroseluna @fiction-fanfic-reader @povofjustme @multilover19 @alexxavicry @cedstars @fuckalrighty @mrsmunson-harrington @misspendragonsworld @nz2004 @ninihrtss

[delirious-donna]

Higuruma Hiromi is a migraine sufferer. He knows all too well the gnawing pain that would see him wishing he could slam his entire body against a wall repeatedly, just to feel something other than the continued ache in his head.

He’s no stranger to pinching the bridge of his nose, eyes screwed tightly shut to block out every iota of light and how even a strong odour could have him retching, running for a restroom.

The only thing that’s worse is when he returns home to find the house bathed in a blanket of twilight despite being still light out. An empty water glass set on the kitchen counter and the cabinets still half open from where you’d likely rummaged for goodness knows what.

With his briefcase and jacket hastily deposited by the door, he strides purposefully for the bedroom, loosening his tie as he goes. His heart rests in his throat at the sight of your curled up in your shared bed, trying to make yourself as small as possible with your head half buried under the sheets and pillows.

His only relief is that you’re asleep, the sound of soft snores tugging the corners of his mouth upwards whilst he pads quietly into the room and sits on the bed. It’s almost pitch black but he sees you as clear as a summer day, his reason for being and the person he holds above all others.

If he could take the pain into him he would, even knowing how debilitating migraines could be. Hiromi would suffer a thousand migraines if it spared you from even one. His fingers ease back your hair, chuckling at your favourite metal water bottle you’ve managed to wedge into the corner of your eye, but he doesn’t dare remove it. This is your comfort, and he wouldn’t strip you of it even if it did look a little silly.

You wake not long after, the faint tippy tap of fingers flying over keys alerting you to the presence of your husband, and you roll over to find him. In his favourite band t-shirt from his youth, you discover Hiromi tucked in beside you with his laptop balanced on his lap. He smiles when you blink up at him, though concern lines his brow and mars his expression.

“How is your head, my love?” He asks, reaching out tentative fingers which dance across your forehead then down to your jaw. You lean into the affection, grateful for his presence and glad that the worst of the migraine has subsided.

“Better.” The answer comes out as a croak, and you quickly clear your throat, feeling how dry your mouth has become. You needed a drink in the worst way and your husband knew it.

“There’s green tea with ginger in a flask on your side, and a glass of water.” You hum your appreciation at his thoughtfulness but he continues on. “I also grabbed a cup of ice incase you’d rather suck ice cubes, and there are some crackers too to replenish your salts.”

“Hiromi…” You feel yourself become choked with emotion, the continued way he looks after you even when you haven’t asked.

Gently, he cups your face in both palms. “In my hands, I hold my whole world.” His lips press into your forehead, featherlight but with such meaning behind it that it reaches your soul.

Migraines were the worst but with Higuruma Hiromi by your side, you could deal with anything.