#bella angst is everything to me I’m sorry I had to 😭
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And what if Bella, who wanted to marry someone of her own choice, Bella who had hated being pushed around and so often fell out with her parents about it because for merlin’s sake, she was a bright witch, and she valued family ideals deeply but no, she wouldn’t let them to this to her, wouldn’t lose this form of control.
Bella who agreed to a wedding as a means of strategy, to strike a deal with her parents, or just to get them off her back, to rise as a death eater, to commit herself to the power, for that delicious, delicious control.
Bella who stares at her reflection for hours before her wedding because it has finally, truly dawned on her what she’s getting herself into, setting aside the cool detachment and practical success of the strategy, there is the cold reality of the fact that she’s marrying a man she doesn’t love.
Bella who smiles through it because it’s her plan and if she got herself into it, she damn well can’t be caught lacking. Bella who will hold her head high, because she won’t admit it even to herself that it’s killing her inside a little. That something in her is a little uncertain about her choice.
Narcissa who was so happy for Bellatrix on her wedding day, only to burst out crying the day after because this means Bellatrix is moving, Bellatrix is leaving her. Narcissa feeling so overjoyed for Bellatrix because she seems happy (idk if she is) and she looks so happy she’s leaving the house but Narcissa realising this means she’ll be on her own and she won’t have anyone to ever go to.
It doesn’t even matter that Bellatrix will only be a apparation away, she’s gone. She’s not in that house anymore, it’s only Narcissa now, and god does Narcissa feel alone.
#ari rambles#bella angst is everything to me I’m sorry I had to 😭#Idk if andy was banished by then but if she wasn’t she totally would’ve called bella out on it#and Bella would’ve done it anyway except there would be a kind of reassurance in knowing her sisters would support and comfort her through#even if they hated how her reasons could be destructive for her own self even if it was to gain something else#also my quillkiller hearttt ahhh I can’t get behind bella agreeing to it for any other reason#except if she had something to prove or saw an opportunity she could get out of marrying rodolphus#but then her strategy catches up to her and oh right it does affect her in the long term#bella is sharp and strategic but also extremely impulsive when it comes to considering the repercussions of her actions to me#she self destructs so much without even realising it because she IS getting the things she wants but like at what cost?#herself and her own sanity and mental well being 😭#bellatrix black#quillkiller#the black sisters
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omg omg omg omg omg omg im here im here!
“baby” BRO IF HAECHAN DOESNT STFU OMG HIS ATTITUDE IS SO UGH (hot) KARINA BETTER THROW THE ROCKS AT HIMMM
also i wanna know what haechan asked jaemin bc wdym he just gave him y/n’s @? 😭 no wait but the at the same time, he probably thought he was probably playing matchmaker… idk jaemin cracks me up tho 😭
“but it’s quite cute” “you know where my room is” ugh im in love with them already but seeing how haechan is, ik the angst is gonna go crazyyy 😭 (if it involves all of us throwing rocks at haechan, karina calls dibs)
BUT YES I REMEMBER THAT about your friend and tbh sameeee rn (a little lore about me 😈) i have a situation with this friend who is great btw she’s very talkative, very friendly, well, extremely friendly, and lately she’s been having a thing with this guy and mind you, i used to live with her for a bit in her dorms (i commute which means i don’t live in uni) and she would drop me if her then bf came over, but we got closer after she and that bf broke up
but she’s been talking with this new guy, i have been encouraging when she is overthinking it, and lately… it’s all she’s been talking about 😭 i try to talk about my day and it gets dismissed when she tells me something about the guy and believe me, im happy for her, but we haven’t talked for two days now and when she does text me, it’s to let me know what the guy did
okay that’s it 😋
but it’s just like… i love our friendship but previous friendships before ended bc my friends would make their partners their entire personality and would drop their friends. like what is going on 😭😭 idk but thats enough lore 🫡
But i totally get not feeling excited…
i hope everything is okay tho! hope youre taking care of yourself and are staying well hydrated. thank you so much for the update! your brain just goes crazy and i love it 😋
- 🫧
(bella is getting a new harness with a little bow and she’s very excited! she’s also getting shoes bc it’s getting hot and i don’t want her paws to burn)
(also! She’s a maltipoo right? but we’re starting to notice she spots like a dalmatian and it’s kinda cool and so pretty 😭)
(and yes, we got compared to satoru and suguru out of nowhere 🥲 like damn… it makes me sad tho hearing that comparison 😭😭)
WELL YES jaemin is the biggest ynhyuck shipper of course he’s gonna give y/n’a @ to haechan (he had no idea of his motives), bless his clueless heart, he’s so silly 😭
i love how we all want karina to to fr throw rocks at him like we need this to happen one day, karina WILL call dibs when it comes to the angst and hurting haechan you already know she doesn’t play about y/n!!!! even jaemin might throw a small rock
OMG NO…. i’m so sorry to hear that 😭😭 i can tell that this is the beginning stages of her crush, so i advise (definitely not saying you SHOULD because i know confrontation is scary even if it is with friends 😭) that you genuinely have a talk with her about how all she does is talk about that guy and how you feel like conversations w her are starting to become pointless because they revolve around stuff you’re not interested in. its an extremely shitty situation to be put in and i’ll honestly never understand why people can’t seperate their friends and relationship and not bring one into the other.
i think your friend might understand if you bring it up tho, since you said she’s very friendly, if you say that you’re saying this from a malicious stance but rather in a way where you’re trying to improve your friendship, im sure she’ll understand. and if she doesn’t, then it really isn’t a friendship you should waste your time on because it shows where her priorities are (men over friends)
anyways yeah i’ve been well i actually saw her for the first time today since she reached out to me again and it was surprisingly.. really nice.
I FIND PEOPLE WJO PUT THEIR PETS IN CLOTHES AND ALL SO CUTE LIKE YESSS PUT HER IN CUTE LITTLE SHOES PLSSS, i bet she looks rlly cute w her spots, but wouldn’t that maybe mean that she might be a hybrid? either way i hope she is gonna be happy with her new shoes and harness, a little early (?) birthday present!!
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SOUP!! HI ITS ME 🦦 AGAIN!!
sorry i’ve been AWOL, life’s been a bit chaotic and i haven’t had time to sit down and fangoirl the way i normally do!! i’ve still been keeping up w every single one of the things you post tho, even if i haven’t been commenting!!! your writing is still my all time fav OFC and RAH i appreciate you and your stories sm <3
i don’t remember what’s the last thing i commented on but AHHHH ive loved so many of the most recent ones!! vince’s flu on wen’s bday!! the bromance, the way luke took care of him!!!! jon and leo’s engagement!!!!! so fucking cute and exciting sob!!! jon taking care of angie filled my heart w joy 😭 the jon and leo food poisoning one was also TOP TIER and omfg the fic abt vin overeating did THINGS to me 🤭🤭
totally off topic but i’m so sorry to hear abt your health scare!! sending the best vibes and hoping everything works out for the best! manifesting health!!!!
also, very random but i wanna know if i’m crazy and just reading into things? is it just me or have you been hinting at wen’s ED kinda being back? like ofc not full force but i feel like there’s been little things here and there that kinda point to that and if this is the case,, gosh you know i’m one of the biggest angst enjoyers so i would love for you to explore it a bit more if that’s something you’re comfortable with!! (and i also think it’s good timing bc it would make sense for it to get bad again at this point in her life with everything that’s been going on)
anyways i’m excited to see what’s next for everyone!! i’m probs gonna send one or two different asks w some requests hehehe 🤭
THANKS FOR EVERYTHING YOU DO!!
KEEP SLAYING!!!
🦦
🦦!! Hi babe!! So glad to hear from you, I was missing you! How's life been treating you?
Tysm for the well wishes, I'm keeping all my fingers crossed!
About Wendyyyy.... Not really, no! Full disclosure, there was a plan to have Wendy relapse, but that was when I thought Vince and her would stay broken up! Instead, they got back together and are going more strong than ever, so that also fell out of the window!
I think what you might be reading on Wendy is that I've brought up her ED a couple times, mostly because I'm writing her getting more and more close with the gang (in particular Bella), so I imagine she'd open up more too.
I got a request a billion months ago that asked for Wendy to be sick and Vince to overthink and assume its her relapsing and I'm very in love with that ask still. I think it fits their current storyline, since he's away and Wendy IS very happy atm so I don't see her genuinely relapsing, and I'm gonna write it, I just gotta write a couple other things first 🙈
There was also a request for Wendy to have a migraine (long time since she had one!) and Max be the caretaker, with Vince being very protective of her once he gets there! SO no ED relapse, but there are some Wendy stories in the makings 💛
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i’ve been acting delulu about the whole wen+vin fight that we all knew was coming up, kinda like completely ignoring it was a thing and all your warnings bc im #notemotionallystrong and i liked pretending it wasn’t gonna happen to cope <3333 BUT AHHHHH after this last fic IM LITERALLY FULL ON SOBBING (IN PUBLIC) WHAT THE FUCKKKK SOUP😭😭😭 you’re so mean (lovingly) 😩 FR IM SO SAD I LOVE MY BABIES SO MUCH THIS IS AWFUL BUT ALSO THE FIGHT WAS SO WELL WRITTEN😭 AND LIKE SO UPSETTING AND UNCOMFY BC OF HOW REAL IT FELT idk how to explain it but it’s like hearing my parents (aka my best friends who’ve been together forever LOL) fight LMAO sobbing 😩😩😩 and also OMG I AUDIBLY GASPED AND HAD TO LOOK AWAY WHEN I READ THE PHONE NOTIFICATIONS THING AND REALISED IT WAS LEO’S TEXT like if there was a terrible way to find out it was THIS 😭😭😭😭😭 BABY GIRL THINKING EVERYONE HAS KNOWN FOR MONTHS???? AND THEN VIN SO DESPERATELY TRYING TO EXPLAIN HIMSELF???? AND JUST TALK??? (a lil too late tho buddy but also I GET IT GOSHHHH) AND THEN BOTH SOBBING GODDDD I CANT I CANT this is so devastating amazing job boo‼️
OMG AND ALSO THE OTHER FICS? i hadn’t commented on them bc i was waiting for this one to react to everything but GODDAMN????? LUKE POOR BUB all feverish spilling everything??? and their reactions🥺🥺🥺🥺 (also side note jon so worried about luke was beautiful and i enjoyed it very much🤭) and OMG leo’s guilt about not noticing the depression symptoms 😩 and the whole thing w bella and kit GOSH I WANT TO PUNCH HIM IN THE FACE HES SUCH AN ASSHOLE‼️
BUT ANYWAYS GOING BACK TO MY BABIES RAAAAAHHHHH I NEED WEN AND VIN TO BE OKAY omfg IM NOT STRONG ENOUGH FOR THIS😭😭 you’re so good at writing angst tho like goddamn i’m still crying and will probably continue to cry about this 😩😭 they need to be okay 🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️ also i know you said you were nervous about luke and wen’s storyline and im SO CURIOUS and excited to read‼️ im sure whatever you choose to do with them is gonna be amazing and you know we all have a beautiful love/hate relationship w angst so i have a feeling we’re gonna eat it up!! (which we will do regardless bc your writing and storytelling is always wonderful!!!)
sending a snotty sobby virtual hug to all my babies and a strong virtual punch to kit <33333
🦦
ANSWERING THIS SO LATE THAT VIN/WENDY ARE BACK TOGETHER I'M SORRYYYY
I'm actually cackling at you acting delulu because I remember I dropped many MANY hints of the Wendy/Vince break up and you were in my inbox completely ignoring them and me thinking "damn, am i being too subtle???"
Its so funny (and terrible) to be answering this late, because I can totally say the things I was nervous about. So ORIGINALLY Vin/Wendy didnt get back together, they actually broke it off for good and Wendy feeling very isolated from her friend group relapsed in her eating disorder.
But then Wendy kinda girl bossed her way into getting back with Vince, which was not planned, AND opened up to Bella, that was also not planned at all. So I scrapped that storyline! I still want to do something with her E.D, I remember I got an ask ages ago that was something like "Wendy refuses to eat because she's feeling queasy, Vince thinks she relapsed and tries to push her, only to have it come back up and he realizes she's actually sick", so I'll probably write that! A more mild version of what I originally had in mind!
And I'm SORRY i'm a terrible person but I'm sooo proud of myself for making you cry in public. I need a blog badge just for that #angster
Love you 🦦!
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SOUP!!!!!!!
HI HI HI HI I CANT EXPLAIN HOW HAPPY I AM THAT YOURE BACK!!! oh my goodness i was literally typing this when i saw that you asked where i’ve been💀 i’ve been reading fics as you post them (i don’t have notifs on but i check your blog for updates on a regular basis LMAO) but life shtuff has only now died down enough for me to actually write/comment on things!! gosh i’m so excited you’re back!! in the LEAST pressure-y way, it’s almost embarrassing how slowly days went by as i was waiting for you to start posting again LOL like at one point i was telling myself “okay she said 20 days, it’s probably been at least a week”. it had been literally 3 days 💀 HAHAHAHWH
ANYWAYS
AHHHHHH MY BABIES MY BABIES!!!!! i don’t remember what the last thing i talked about on here was but WOW these last fics have made me cry and laugh and blush sooo many different times!! wen finding out was CRAZY and i literally sobbed w her bc the way everything played out was so unfortunate but also so realistic and raw and i had so many mixed feelings about everything!!!! and then wen isolating and bella checking on her!! and wen trying to push her away and then admitting that she felt so lonely GOD THAT WAS DEVASTATING but then bella being so supportive and comforting AGHHHH my girlsss <3333
and then omg the fic after that one??? i was SO surprised that wen forgave vin? and that they’re trying long distance??? i’m so fucking excited and happy abt that but god i’m sure it’ll be hard 😭 but YAY I KNEW THEY LOVED EACH OTHER TOO MUCH TO GIVE UP LIKE THAT ♥️
side note, luke being so depressed and struggling so much to adapt to his meds is so sad but so realistic too :,) i’m glad you’re making this a part of the plot!! but my man is def off his meds already lol im interested to see where this goes!! and also i LOVE how well jon and leo are doing <3 despite everything going on, they’re in their happy era fr <3
and now i’m sorry but the sick vin fic?????????? FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, IT WAS EVERYTHING I NEEDED AND MORE‼️ first off, leo talking to him and being so real but also like calling him out like that??? while still being super supportive??? and the way he described wen was so accurate and so him-coded??? and then AHHHHH i’ve ALWAYS loved vin and bell’s friendship, i’ve genuinely always thought it was super adorable and i wanted more of them, so this fic was gold 🤭 a trope that ALWAYS gets me is when someone is ANGRY at someone they love and ofc being bitchy and sassy until they realise said someone is very much Unwell (it’s especially good if they’re so sick that they’re really out of it), and when they realise how sick they are they IMMEDIATELY switch from mad to concerned + caretaker mode!!!! so yeah you can imagine this whole fic had me on my knees 🤭 obsessed w how protective of luke bell is, and how protective of vin wen is, but also how both girls just jumped straight into action when he was clearly not feeling good <333 and then vin realising wen was using her dr. voice, and then the pure ANGST at the end when he sobs and they just hug and the “god i’m gonna fucking miss you” SOB SOB SOB SOB 😭😭😭🫶🏽🫶🏽🫶🏽
bell sick and luke taking care of her was also AMAZINGGGG🫶🏽 i always love when my girls get whumped <3333 omg and AHHHH luke and vin finally talking abt shtuff🥹 the “nothing to forgive” 😭 luke knowing he’ll get sick AND holding him closer??? GOSH THE BROTP MAN !!!!!
and oh my goodness i just read the most recent fic with the new OC!!!! this is so exciting and cool and i love his vibes ahhhh <3 i love how nonchalant max seems abt shtuff and im so so excited to see where things go!! i hope vin and him become friends but also i feel like there’s gonna be some tension and weird banter going on between them at least at first hehehe
ANYWAYS
your writing is fucking incredible and whenever i see a new post from your blog it genuinely lights up my day <3 i am completely in love with all your characters and the depth and intricacies behind each of them ♥️ i’m so thankful your blog exists🫶🏽 also, i saw you were really struggling for a while and i just wanted to check in and see if you were doing better? you’re so loved and talented and appreciated and you deserve all the peace and love and happiness in the world!!! i hope things are going well/better!
i can’t wait to read more of what you write! i’m super excited about this new character and about reading more stories abt your lovely OCs <3
YOU’RE AMAZING THANK YOU FOR EVERYTHING AND KEEP SLAYING!!!
🦦
Soup found DEAD from love cardiac arrest outside of Miami beach.
🦦!!!!! Honestly I don't even wanna post your comments, I just wanna stare at them for hours 🙈🙈
Don't worry about catching up on fics, they'll be here when life slows down!! I know very well how sad it is that we must Adult ™.
I am SO HAPPY you liked the Wendy/Vince developments!! In my head you're like THE Wendy/Vin supporter, so every time I write something with them I'm like "uhmmm wonder what 🦦 is gonna think??"
Caretaker who's pissed and then switches to comfort is also one of my favorite tropes, I looooove the spiciness of guilt thrown in!
Take care babe 💛💛
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