#being trans was just another part of that

[enkays-den]

(hopefully) Final Update! Skizz supports trans rights!

I will let Skizz speak for himself, because he did it pretty dang well, with some highlights courtesy of me

"Hello all, just gonna drop this right here. I wish to clear up some churn over this stream that was just starting to spin a bit out of control, and quickly at that. Simply put, I was feeling really happy and good with the vibes of the stream (As I most often do), and failed to vet a dono msg prior to instantly reading it out loud. The message was centered on my support of the LGBTQ community and more over requesting I explicitly state aloud “Trans Rights”. My response was instant and not totally well thought out. While I do think that there is an unfortunate political dynamic to the LGBTQ community, the word I was actually trying to conjure up was “polarizing”. The reason I’d rather not delve into said polarizing topics is because of what inevitably comes from it. There were several comment threads of people going back and forth at each other over this. Much of which was cordial, some not so much, and all of it not fitting for the comment section of one of my stream VODs. I’ve removed them all because it’s just not the place for it. Obviously I believe in trans rights as we’re all people, every one of us. I just don’t fancy, and never will, being told what to say. It’s not lost on me how stubborn I can be. 😊 There was actually some talk that I’m open to harnessing hate in my community. Not sure where I slipped up to give that impression so let me be crystal clear; hate is not tolerated here and never has been. It literally means nothing to me what one’s take is on any matter. I could agree whole heartedly but if the position is delivered in a fashion designed to cause pain, discomfort or divisiveness on any level, then please take that somewhere else. This is indeed intended to be a safe space. So to that end, if you want to hang out where the vibes are real and the good times continue to roll, well then I’m looking forward to seeing you at the next stream. If you’d rather be a part of the seemingly endless game of disposition ping-pong, I completely respect that but politely request you all meet at another forum to do so. Now genuinely…..genuinely…..be good, be good to each other, and I’ll see you soon."

So all in all, about what I expected, with two notes:

There was some discussion in the youtube comments saying anon shouldn't have paid Skizz to say 'trans rights', and that is fair. SHOULDN'T is a strong word, as Skizz is notoriously bad at reading his chat and this person clearly wanted to be heard and validated. Either way, try not to use donations to coerce content creators to say things like a damn puppet! Not even Joe!

Don't take his attitude of "disposition ping-pong" to heart

Thank you for being kind in the comments. There were a few people that were getting a little spicy in the approach, but I'll choose to believe that those people did not come from my post. Skizz was not actively encouraging hate with his words, but he also didn't acknowledge the harm that inaction can do.

Keep your tone calm and your points reasonable, be resolute in your feelings, and know that you can only state your feelings, not force action. That is the way to keeping these sorts of discussions calm.

If this is all a devastating ordeal, please take this as hopefully the hardest lesson that the content creators themselves are not the safe space: it's the people in that safe space. If Skizz doesn't want to say "trans rights", find people that will scream it for you. Fandoms and cc's will rise and fall, but friendships and bonds can last FAR beyond that. THAT is your home. Your blorbo is simply the 30 posters you glue to the wall.

This is hopefully my final update as Skizz spoke concisely and without any places to hide. DO NOT BLOW THIS UP. I gave him explicit permission to delete my comment because I knew he would have to, and I hold no grudge against him for it. I am happy with his answer. I still love him as a content creator just as much as I did yesterday morning. I'll wish him the happiest of birthdays on Saturday. Rest easy knowing that you have your answer, one way or another

And for those of you that need it:

An anonymous trans donator asked skizz if he'd say a "trans rights" for pride month and he softly shut it down saying "this channel about good times good vibes, and not anything political. I've got nothing against anything, I've driven that home."

I know it's parasocial to be disappointed that a man in his mid 40s considers queer rights a political topic and it doesn't mean I won't watch him but,,,,, I couldn't help but feel my heart sink a little as that played out live. Skizz says he wants to bring happiness, and joy, and that's literally all this person wanted. A firm, no room for doubt affirmation that Skizz sees and cares for his trans fans. I don't think he's transphobic, but I do think he has a misconception about why saying "trans rights" matters, and why it SHOULDNT be political. Pride month exists for the same reason there's a women's month, and a black history month, and a Juneteenth, and a Veteran's Day. We are lucky to be alive, and we're still fighting for our rights to this day, so we need times to just celebrate our continued existence.

And like,,,, I'm sure that he's heard a lot online but the discussion on trans rights is only political because basic human rights are being denied to trans people for no reason other than bigotry. We want basic human rights for all, for trans people, gay people, disabled people, people of color. We want the standard of care the government and its services and the businesses of our country to be better, more accessible, and affordable for EVERYONE, regardless of gender, race, political belief, religion. The fact that THAT desire is a political matter is because politicians keep denying it.

There were also members of his chat that subtlety ragged on the anonymous donator, saying it was "weird" and "cringe". I have no words for them.

I know Hermitcraft is supposed to be a safe space, and a place to get away from the world's problems, but so you know what is counteractive to that? Bigotry. Transphobia. There are so many young queer fans of hermitcraft, and to say that their existence, this one little piece of affirmation isn't allowed, is insulting and disheartening. Good vibes isn't all free speech and being neutral, it's explicitly saying "you are safe here. I see that you are in danger and you are safe."

I will also leave this video here because I think it's important to be firm about keeping bigotry out of your community, regardless if it means you get less viewers or are seen as "political"

[this-is-exorsexism]

"nonbinary people shouldn't demand to be recognised on medical forms, as they're all either biologically male or female anyway."

this is exorsexism.

just because cis, binary gender applies to you and you can comfortably rest in being seen as your "biological gender" doesn't mean that this bioessentialist bs is true for other people. nonbinary people, and transgender people as a whole, are our genders through and through, including "biologically". we're not x gender in this part of our lives and y gender in another (unless people conceptualise it that way for themselves). just because "biology" validates your cis, binary gender doesn't mean you get to invalidate trans people based on a concept we know does not define someone's gender. if the form is asking about sex, keep male and female terminology out of it and ask about body parts, for we won't misgender ourselves for your comfort.

you're telling us that nonbinary lives only matter if you can misgender us as one binary gender or another. otherwise, we're entirely disposable, not worth research, not worth being taken seriously.

and then they wonder why we're scared to go to the doctor, knowing they'll misgender us and not see us in our entirety, which inherently feels unsafe.

[aroaceleovaldez]

happy pride month here's some of my misc hcs:

Camp was literally founded by a god mythologically known for being gnc and queer (Apollo) and is actively run by another explicitly queer god who also specifically presides over transgender experiences (Dionysus). It's an extremely queer-friendly space.

Will is head of camp's GSA and has been since he joined. He may or may not have founded it.

Regardless, Will is in charge of camp's pride events and is very enthusiastic about it. He's also in charge of teaching about queer awareness at camp probably as part of their health courses that he also probably helps teach, and he has a near comical amount of various pamphlets in the infirmary. He gets very excited about shoving informational pamphlets at people. He made half of them himself. Queer topics are probably a hyperfixation of his.

Trans!Will!!!!! I'm a big fan of the idea of Naomi being a big queer advocate (probably also queer herself) and being super supportive so Will has mostly already socially transitioned before he comes to camp.

Also a big fan of micro-celebrity Will where he's mostly just famous for being Naomi's son and being such a vocal queer advocate. Austin has the popular youtube channel and Will is the niche instagram famous one he clickbaits for views. Symbiotic sibling dynamic.

Lithromantic Drew is very fun to me. Just her not realizing she's aspec and going "idk why it's so hard for everybody else to simply just Stop Being In Love when somebody starts crushing on them back. Must be a skill issue. :T" She figures it out eventually but she still decides it's an everybody else problem.

Transmasc Zia! Zia's only one of two people known to have been possessed by an immortal who doesn't seem to match their gender. Cue Zia thinking real hard about being able to be the Eye of Ra but having an involuntary very physical rejection of hosting Nephthys. Sounds of egg cracking.

Genderfluid Percy. Cue the other 1/2 of people possessed by an immortal who doesn't seem to match their gender. Percy is extra confused at first cause he probably only starts thinking about it once he learns Zia is trans and people explain the gods-matching-gender thing to him and he's like "Huh... but Nekhbet and I aren't the same gender... but also we didn't sync completely? But I wasn't not able to host her? So what does that mean?" It takes him ages to figure out that it's his gender fluctuates so he had Enough Girl™ for Nekhbet to work with but he wasn't a girl at the time so they couldn't sync. I also like to think it takes him an extra while because he prefers he/him pronouns regardless and doesn't really change his presentation depending on gender so all he has to go on is fleeting gender vibes.

Also I think it's funny if he has clownfish gender logic, so he's always like "Why do I never feel like One Of The Guys when i'm with the boys but I never feel more masc than when I'm standing next to the Hunters of Artemis or the Amazons. Weird."

obligatory aroace Leo Valdez mention. i flip flop between Leo not having a qpp or him and Hazel being qpps. QPP Hazeleo is very cute to me.

Camp Jupiter is also extremely queer-friendly. Despite this, Jason is only just figuring out that he's bi. Annabeth is also only just figuring out that she's also bi and it's a funny adventure to watch for everybody else who was already aware of this. Piper and Percy and Will have all known that they're bi for years.

Aroflux Calypso fun yay

okay thats all i can think of for now

[jesncin]

we need to talk about dc pride 2025-

PURELY from a consumer perspective!! I'm not writing this in an antagonistic way just because I'm part of the DC Pride fanzine (which I'm very proud of, you should check it out)- I just really want to talk about it and I feel I'm entitled to an opinion as gay book king of 2025 so HERE WE GO

To catch you up to speed, the DC Pride specials are usually anthologies with a handful of short stories highlighting and celebrating DC's canonically queer characters, with an all queer creative team (as is tradition). They're ordinarily self contained stories. This year though it looks like they tried to be more ambitious- and the stories are all connected to a bigger plot. In my humble opinion this was a huge mistake.

It's the nature of anthologies to have hit and miss stories! You've got a huge pool of creatives and some of those writing styles or stories aren't going to vibe with you. But that's no biggie, because you can just hop onto the next story and start fresh. It's what I've come to enjoy about anthologies! And I found this an accessible way to learn about DC's queer characters through these short stories.

BUT THAT'S NOT THE CASE FOR THIS YEAR'S SPECIAL. The overarching plot that all the Pride stories are under follow a magic plot where all queer characters across universes are trapped in a fantasy world (where they supposedly have all their desires granted) and need to snap out of it to get back into the real world. A character named Ethan Rivera, a trans man who served in the war, is usually the one to snap people out of it. This Pride Special serves as a backdoor-pilot style origin story for Ethan.

The story serves as a spiritual sequel to Alan Scott's recent solo comic. Years ago, Alan and his ex carved a heart onto this wall in a gay bar, unknowingly imbuing it with magic. In modern times, the wall and the bar its in are going to be turned into a parking lot, another gay monument lost to history. Suddenly it's doing some cosmic horror stuff where every queer character is sucked into a fantasy and regroup there.

(this dialogue is so....uh trite and on the nose I'm sorry afasdf)

This might seem like a new fun way to shake the Pride specials up- you get an overarching plot and everyone gets to interact with each other. There's a main character to help follow you through the action, theoretically giving you the opportunity to explore more depth in conflict than your usual short self contained Pride story, etc.

But no. It did the opposite for me. The overarching plot put some serious constrains on the writers, forcing them to essentially write the same plot over and over again.

Character is in a fantasy, something is off, Ethan snaps them out of it, and they all end up in a "home base of operations" where they get exposition dumped and caught up to speed with the magic shenanigans happening.

Interesting at first but very quickly overstays its welcome!! I couldn't escape the loop. I wasn't granted the freedom of a fresh start to read a new story, it was the same plot. Again and again and again.

I can sense some writers really trying with the limits they're given. Vita Ayala's The Question segment was among the stronger stories! And I felt a sense of this character's personality and history way more than the others.

Other characters weren't so lucky. Connor Hawke has been done so dirty this year. Not only was he whitewashed in a Pride illustration (that accompanies this collection), with half his face covered to add insult to injury- but he got a meager 2 pages of backstory before being cast to the side. And the writing was among the worst of the collection. Tragic.

(these panels summarize all these stories' plots. Just the same thing rinse and repeat)

Lowkey hate that the ace character's "celebration" this year is getting smooched on and then cast aside for a bigger plot. Justice for Connor.

Quick roundup of stories I want to talk about- sorry if I don't include your fav! This was just such a repetitive read that they all sort of melt together in my mind.

Any Apollo and Midnighter fan can go in more detail over how these complex morally grey characters get watered down to being sanitized Pride ads every year, so I'm going to review this on just the basic storytelling level. The premise is that the fantasy these two husbands are stuck in is a tongue-in-cheek respectable sitcom. "vigilante justice" is "legalized" but whenever someone violently threatens the gay couple, Midnighter can't really kill them. They turn into confetti.

I can sense this is trying to poke fun at respectability and censorship but it lands flat for me. Why are there people threatening them with slurs and guns if it's an escapist paradise? I've never seen a cute sitcom have that. It doesn't help that this idyllic fantasy is literally a desire for Apollo. That the reason they're stuck there is that one of them actually likes it there. If they went a more WandaVision route where they were stuck in a censored reality where they can't boink and have to dress as respectable sweater-wearing neighborhood gay dads, this could've poked fun at the company's own problems with softening edgy queer characters. Just a fascinating case study of attempting rebellion within a company.

Quick note for Harley's story. It basically says that all her modern motivations boil down to wanting a girlfriend. If that isn't a summation for how these characters lose all depth after being canonized as queer I don't know what is.

We need to talk about the Blue Snowman story. Or what I like to call, "this year's contender for "Pride is a Party""

Summarized perfectly by Dizzy on twitter as

The Blue Snowman's fantasy is that they're outed by Wonder Woman when she uses the Lasso of Truth on them. Forced to come to terms with their fluid gender identity, they imagine being graciously accepted and defended by the world against Wonder Woman, with her labeled as "Not An Ally". (we'll talk about how Wondie's canonically queer later in the conclusion)

I get that it's a joke, that the Blue Snowman is self deprecating, insecure, while also being egotistical enough to frame Xanthe Zhou as an "unimportant trans person"- who is inspired by the Blue Snowman to be queer. But it's not funny. And reads like a conservative "the gays are so fragile" comic. Again, this is presented to us as the Blue Snowman's secret desire. Much like the Apollo and Midnighter one, any commentary it's trying to make doesn't land.

Xanthe and Blue Snowman only "reconcile" in a quiet sequence of panels where Blue Snowman begrudgingly holds Xanthe's hand. The one time this comic decides to shut up, it does this. Justice for Xanthe because they barely get stories outside of these DC specials, and the one time they return it's to be insulted and barely apologized to.

The Blue Snowman story is the most trans focused narrative out of the entire collection this year (outside of Ethan exposition dumping his origin story). And this is what we got.

In between everyone's stories, we see Ethan in a dreamscape fantasy realm that is very beautifully rendered! Props to A.L. Kaplan!!

Even though I visually love these pages, I did find them disruptive to the flow of stories. It didn't help that Ethan sort of intrudes on everyone's stories to snap them out of their fantasies- I just found it all annoying to read. I couldn't really get into each character because they were mandated to follow a specific structure. In the end I still don't have a grasp of who Ethan is as a character either, despite all that screen time.

Ethan just tells us his origin, we don't experience it with him. He explains to us how he feels about everything. He is entirely a tell not show character.

He'll even explain what the metaphors represent to the reader. "Because it feels as though everything I've done since then has involved a transition of some kind. It's like I'm always transitioning. Like this place." "It's a beautiful tribute Alan. And look what you started! These carvings, this wall...it's like a monument. it represents everything you and so many others were feeling." This is real dialogue. He literally tells us what the wall represents like we're too foolish to know.

The dialogue in general was a pain to read. Everyone sounded like a Joss Whedon character. They'd say the most obvious on the nose thing, in a weak attempt to hide it as quirky charisma. It was not working.

(just because you lampshade your writing by showing characters being bored of exposition doesn't mean it's suddenly good writing!!)

It got exhausting to read hope speech after hope speech of characters talking in corporate prideisms that I found myself wanting to skim through the pages because I felt I wasn't learning anything new. And when I say these characters yap, I mean they YAP.

Godspeed to the letterer team because what the heck!!

All this text and for what? More cosmic red lantern magical nonsense.

Anyway the interconnected story ends abruptly. After yelling at the cosmic image of Alan's ex, Ethan returns to the graffiti wall in the gay bar with all the other queer characters transported back to where they came from. And the ending is...surprisingly passive about its conclusion.

There's a strange resignation to the characters. Despite being literal superheroes who have attachment to this gay bar and graffiti wall that houses generations of queer expression, they just kind of give up on saving a queer historical monument. They don't even try.

This is all lamp shaded under a "the fight never ends" speech from Alan. But like, again- y'all didn't try. You didn't fight for the place. You are just telling me that you are. "It's always been that way, and it always will be. That's what we get right? That and the privilege of hoping that, because of what we do, the next generation and the next may get more." A bit of an oxymoron to say it's always the same and hope the next generation will get it better.

I understand what this collection is going for. Deeper, interconnected conflict for its queer characters that you wouldn't normally get in its typical anthology format. It's even trying to end in a more somber note. They don't save the gay bar and its graffiti wall. They move on.

But it's lacking nuance in its garbled hope speech by the end. I understand that "It gets better" can become an irritating platitude to hear when historically, we know it doesn't always get better for marginalized people. I think if the story ended with "Things don't always get better. It can get worse if we're not careful, that's why we have to keep fighting." And show your characters being active instead of just accepting queer erasure when it happens, that could be really resonant with the current political climate. Instead we get this passive resignation. Anti-hope disguised in hope speeches.

Quick review of the Jenny Blake auto bio in the end. It's cute, though I have some thoughts. Inevitably when these collections feature an auto bio comic, they feel more authentic because they're about a real person.

I do find it ironic that Blake starts this comic by saying "just as no two human beings are exactly alike...no two lgbtqia+ stories are exactly alike" when it's featured in an anthology about queer characters experiencing the same "I'm in a fake fantasy, whoa time to wake up into the real world! What going on? Someone exposition dump me please" story over and over and over again. I had lost a lot of my patience by the time I made it to the end of this collection. And this felt like a punch in the face in the funniest way. Amazing lack of self awareness.

I have a nitpick for this later part though. Blake says "Evil reared its ugly head, and my country descended into cruelty and madness. Playing it safe was no longer an option. I needed to represent as my true self. I would not hide in the closet waiting for the bigots and transphobes to come find me!"

It's very cloying in its delivery. But I take issue with framing closeted people as shameful cowards who won't live their truth. Just "waiting for bigots to come find them". If things are hard for you in Texas (or anywhere for that matter) as a trans person, being in the closet doesn't make you any less queer. You're just protecting yourself the way Superman does when he's being Clark Kent.

NOW FOR BIG CONCLUSION FEELINGS

The DC Pride anthologies are always interesting to me for the wrong reasons. I'm fascinated by them like it's performance art. They're an annual celebration of the company's queer characters and staff. But they're also Pride ads. Sometimes there's little gems in the collection, but for the most part its watered down and corporate. I love dissecting all the ways they represent respectability, assimilation and the struggle between art and commerce.

This collection's existence is proof- evidence if you will- that queer writers don't always make great queer stories. Because they're human beings.

So this year's collection showing ambition to break away from the celebration-style writing to be more interconnected and somber, but still managing to feel corporate is a case study that my brain can't stop chewing on. Despite its deviance from the norm, it still follows DC's limitations with queer rep.

DC has so many more queer characters than those that show up in their Pride specials. And they even have huge mainline queer characters that mysteriously never show up in Pride.

Remember how the Blue Snowman comic joked about Wonder Woman not being an ally? Well. She's not. Because Diana's a canonically queer character. But DC doesn't market her that way. To the general audience, DC wants you to believe that Nubia is the queer Themysciran, the queer member of wonderfam. Despite Wonder Woman being a queer headline Trinity member, DC wants you to remember that Diana is for the boys. So they can't have her in the Pride anthologies.

Same with Selina Kyle, she may be Catwoman, she may have kissed a woman, but she's for the boys. So both her and Diana have a magical restraining order from the Pride Specials. A Lasso of Lies if you will. Catman can be here, though. Allies like Nightwing can be featured too.

Bi representation in DC is very bi-nary (pun intended). When Harley Quinn was canonized as bi, she's written like a lesbian character. Modern Harley solely hits it up with women, and has no feelings for men. Even in this collection she's being creeped on by a dude and has to reject his advances as she chases her girlfriend. It's as though DC resigned and said "fine, Harley's for the girls".

When Tim Drake came out as bi, he's virtually been written as a gay man. All his previous relationships with women are written off and discarded. Highlighting his gay relationship as the true relationship.

When Jon Kent came out as bi, he never says the word "bi". And is written to be a gay character. Yeah he's in dramatic love triangle right now, but we can't have our biggest multi-flag wearing mascot cheat and feel complex about this. That would be a bad bi stereotype! We can't have that.

The luckiest we get is bi characters like John Constantine. Who flirts constantly with men- but only has deep, character-defining romantic relationships with women. That's as good as it gets. He'll get bi jokes tossed at him though. We can't have everything.

That's only one out of the many ways corporate mingling messes with these characters. How it stops them from being truly transgressive. Because this Pride Special, for all its ambitions, just has the same foundational problems of the collection's usual offerings.

Only this time, in my opinion, there was no standout or good story. Because they were all the same story. They were forced to be. Which is deeply ironic for a Pride special.

[valleyian]

Thoughts on Tom Felton and Cursed Childs new casting

Oh boy, time for another long rant nobody asked for because I legit cannot go any longer without expressing my utter devastation and anger at this.

Let’s start with this. I hate JKR, and due to Toms connection and support of her, I hate him by proxy. Here’s what made HPCC stand out from the regular franchise. The casting was diverse, nuanced and even bold at some times, with multiple trans and queer actors having gotten lead roles. What does adding Tom Felton to the mix do? Ruin that “safe” environment that previously was made by trans/queer actors to spite JKR. The entire rewrite, the actors who helped shape the show for I inclusivity, that’s all gone now.

And before it’s mentioned, I know HPCC could never be a truly safe space for queer and trans people due to it being a part of the HP franchise. However in all of its years running, there have been so many castings of specifically queer actors to the point it feels like type casting. The changes to the script issued by trans/queer actors is also so important to acknowledge, because it combats at least SOME of JKRs stances. Previously I had assumed the HPCC show had taken their stance by doing these diverse castings. Now it is clear they’d rather prioritise money and profit.

Which leads to the next point, being that this is so obviously a cashgrab. I know HPCC isn’t selling well, especially because these past few months they’ve been doing so many collabs with old actors in a desperate attempt to stay relevant, in addition to the Brazil prod being cancelled. What breaks my heart is that HPCC BW does Genuenly have good and specifically queer fan base, that see nuances and good in the show. Not to sound sappy, but the “actual fans” of the show are what makes being in this fandom so fun. People who go to see the actors and appreciate what the show has previously stood for, especially after the rewrite.

Now the show is going to infiltrated by Draco fangirls who couldn’t give to shits about the actual show, and are only there to thirst over a middle aged man past his prime. Stage door is a nightmare, and rip to ANY new actor, especially Draco actors that will cover for him, because nobody is going to acknowledge em anymore. The fact the show is about ALBUS and SCORPIUS, yet the show is advertising more about Draco now, who mind you has like 30 min screen time in the films and even less on stage. Plus I bet there will be an influx of hate towards the actual plot of the show, because BW is running with the new even shorter script, which in my honest opinion sucks.

Lastly, Toms involvement in the show I believe will force the BW actors to be more careful about their outspokenness against JKR, in addition to NDAs being stricter. Previously BW had gotten away with so much, like nearly kisses on stages, and so many other things that and undeniably queer coded. Having Tom, and then by proxy JKR be this close to the show will ruin all that. Not only that but I doubt and hope no trans/queer actor would feel safe sharing a stage with him. Idc if he’s not directly transphobic or homophobic, he has chosen to side with JKR and that’s enough for me to not like him. Previous actors, and current ones now at West-End, constantly repost stuff about trans rights and are vocal about their political views. Being political is a part of theatre, and queer identity and the creative arts. This casting ruins that entirely, and just goes to show how in the end they’re willing to negate 4 years of the progress they made for a quick buck.

Good luck to my US fans out there 🫡🫡

[sparrow-va]

public introspection in this sort of manner, on this sort of topic is, I get the feeling, not really a part of the persona du jour of the modern Tumblr Transfem, but like. fuck it, yknow? I feel like I've already been alienating myself from certain sectors of the community as is so. let's do it.

my thoughts and feelings on the Discourse over the last. idk, year or so? about things like Egg Jokes™️, the Prime Directive and all that have been. fuzzy Feelings and general agreements with sentiments I've seen moreso than a like...Solidly Held and Arguable Position i guess?

generally speaking, I think my belief is that the Egg Prime Directive is bullshit and that I think we as transfems and allies SHOULD be allowed to provide gender transition as A Valid and Positive Option On The Table for people visibly experiencing the recognizable thought patterns, behaviors, and distresses typical to closeted transfems. If it's done in a good-faith and amicable way, I honestly don't see how this is possibly A Bad Thing. Given the options between potentially leaving someone locked in a gender closet believing that they are alone in their struggles and feeling like they have no options but to just...struggle forever, or to potentially give someone the helping hand, the acknowledgement that they have the means and the community out there to reckon with what they're experiencing? I should think the choice is obvious.

i think part of why I hold this belief so tight lately is that like...I didn't have my Gender Moment™️ until the lockdowns hit (yes i'm a quarantrans ha ha let's move on), meaning I was......like 27 or 28 I think?? by the time I rapidly moved down the pipeline of "Cis Guy By Default" to "Femboy??¿¿?" to "Nonbinary transfem". Took me another few years to finally settle on that, yeah, HRT is the right move for me. And it's only within i think. The last few months???? that I've felt like "yeah, okay I think I'm Allowed to say I'm a trans woman. I think that Feels Right."

I've moved down this road so, so fucking agonizingly slowly, I think in large part due to growing up in a household for the majority of my life that stifled any possibility of CONSIDERING I could be anything else but a straight guy (especially my mother who threw a Fit when I posted on facebook for pride month about being bi "heteroflexible" back in 2017. I'll just. Let you guess her reaction to being presented with anything re: trans people. I'll give you another hint: Jerry Springer was a regular fixture on our tv in my youth.). it took me Years of distance and healing after moving out of that household to even begin to entertain the notion that I had like. A Choice In The Matter that could make a positive difference. One of my online friends, around the time of me coming out, said that he'd been getting Egg Vibes from me for like at least a year beforehand. and it was pretty funny at the time, and still is tbh but like. now, when I feel like I'm getting into the game so late, so to speak....it's also a little irritating to think about, like. What! What do you mean!! You knew?? Who else knew and didn't tell me????? Fuck!!!!!!! I just. idk. i want to minimize the chances of other gals having late bloom regrets like i sometimes struggle with.

at the same time. there are a couple of recent-ish coming-out trans girl tumblr funnypeople (one much more recent than the other -- if you're Up To Date on this topic you probably have an idea who I mean, but I don't like to Name Names in these kinds of posts, yknow?) who have given Strong Pushback, let's say, on the idea of Egg Jokes and speculating on someone's potential transfem identity. they've said things to the effect of like...that this kind of thing actually made them feel Less Safe to come out and did more harm than good for them. i. Struggle to comprehend that, I guess. Granted, I am not privy to exactly all of what kinds of sentiments they were subjected to -- one if them I don't think I ever followed, and the other I think I unfollowed a while back when she WAS giving pushback on this kind of stuff. I don't...get it, I guess? But I also don't want to just. Completely disregard and downplay their experiences either, even if I don't really See what they've seen? i dunno.

i also have noticed that as I've started to pull myself away from some of the more.....let's say caustic personalities in my transfem corner of this website, I feel like i've been concurrently seeing less sentiments arguing so ardently to Disregard the Prime Directive and all that? i dunno. There may not be any correlation there, that could entirely be some sort of confirmation or other type of bias from me.

i don't. really have a central Point that I'm driving toward with all this, I'm kinda just. Ruminating, I guess. Taking stock of where I'm at mentally as I navigate the current landscape of my weird-ass Internet Home of one-and-a-half decades. just. disjointed thoughts bumping around in my brain that I needed to pull the release valve on.

i dunno if anybody will get anything out of reading this but. i appreciate you taking the time to bother doing so if ya have. 💙 you're lovely and I hope you have a joyful day ahead of you.

[our-queer-experience]

this is the kind of thing where i think that people need to let go of fandom as the center of their world.

my special interests and hyperfixations for the last year or year and a half have been 1. rape culture 2. sexual abuse in the boy scouts 3. transmisogynistic violence. there have been SO MANY TIMES where i have realized that it is not the right time or place to discuss these things. part of being in a society is conceding to other people- i might be triggering this person, i’m bringing down the mood when there is another time, ext. because even if my idea of a good time is talking about the extensive crimes in the perversion files, i can recognize that it doesn’t need to be every conversation and there are some people (family members, boy scout survivors of sexual assault, my employers) who never need to have this conversation with me!

you can choose to step away. you can choose to scroll a tag without interacting. you can choose to read less fanfic and watch a different movie and stop defending how it’s not bad and if it was it’s not your fault because you have adhd/autism/anxiety some generic diagnosis that excuses keeping a series that funds removing trans rights in uk law popular. you can find a reason to buy more neil gaiman merch instead of supporting the women he raped and traumatized and you can find an excuse to make his tags trend every time fandom has a new update and say it’s not your fault that it’s easier to care about fictional characters than real life women. but maybe we should all. stop thinking about things like this and reinforcing the ideas that we just can’t help how we act and what we say and what we consume. you are not a helpless watcher in your own life.

Im pulling my hair out, someone not horrible make the new and influential pop culture series PLEASE so people will shut about the shitty wizard 🥹

i think people gotta decenter fandom in their lives. get a hobby. be more casual about things. stop putting celebrities up on a pedestal like it’s natural because you will get hurt. you will realize your favorite book was written with certain propaganda in mind or the “moral grayness” you liked was because of the author’s real life beliefs or you’ll realize it’s actually quite shit. and half the time that’s fine and the other half you have to be capable of letting go

idk. i think we shouldn’t cling to fandoms like it’s the center of the world. like. not to say “calm down” but calm down

[shuploc]

thoughts on transmasc Miguel? 👀

YESS, YESSSSS!! slams fists on table, rips shirt open, screams, bangs on chest. Transmasc Miguel is so huge, it's literally the best headcanon I've ever heard. I'm so so so on board.

I won't lie though, I have many things to say about these kinds of headcanons in general, but I'm just gonna keep it short for now and say thumbs up, transmasc miggy is a YES from me 🥰

[mewos-laptop]

Been big into trans guy x cis guy recently, which is a massive surprise to me bc I usually rlly dislike most of the content ppl make abt that specific dynamic (eg: trans guy small and is pre everything and basically a woman and a bottom and shit, cis guy big and strong and Has A Dick or whatever), but there's smth very cool to me abt a trans guy being in a relationship w a cis person who genuinely and wholly sees them as a man and treats them as such, no matter what their physical transition status is. It's very healing as a guy who's dated people who I know only viewed me as "nonbinary at best," if not just a woman, and expected me to fill a role in a lesbian relationship with them

[silly-moth-123]

My younger sibling literally blocked my phone number because we got into an argument over capitalism ???

Wow I reached the tag limit on this post

Beware a long vent in the tags lmao

[ecos-syscourse]

I think you're forgetting that "leftist" views are middle views. Wanting rights for people is something that everyone starts out with.

If nobody follows morals, then what's the point of them?

It's abnormal for people.

Wanting to harm others is not okay. Actually wanting to. Not being scared of the thought, not thinking that they might deserve it, but actually wanting and wishing you could harm others. And I don't understand how you don't see that.

If one guy is evil for trying to traumatize people and succeeding, and you want to traumatize people but are stopped, then what are you? Are you fine just because you're unable to?

Going "Ugh, no I don't have to follow morals because these other people do it worse than me!!!" is NOT a solution.

Let's say you threw a rock at a wall. Somebody else threw a rock at a different someone.

The kid harmed another, so clearly what they did was worse.

But, you damaged property.

That pales in comparison, right?

But why throw a rock at a wall???

Was the wall evil? Was that a reason to throw a rock at it??

Maybe that somebody threw a rock at you. Maybe you threw one back. Now they're throwing another.

"They threw one first!" You threw one back, and who cares if you say you threw it first when you both have blood on your face?

"They threw two rocks!" Who's to say that you didn't throw one first, and they threw two in retaliation?

Who's to say that you didn't throw a rock back but missed?

There are easy claims somebody could make about what happened that are false.

Fighting back and giving threats may seem like you're doing something, may help with making progress, but for them, it only proves that you're somebody "crazed" who they're right to throw a rock at. To them, your posts show their supporters that it's worth it, and that what they're doing is good.

Whatever you do that suits what they're trying to give off, that trans people are violent pedophiles, for example. They give any data they find, *shock* a trans person was near a child! evidence!!

if they spread that people from something you're a part of, systems, people with neurodivergencies, people with autism (I'm sure there's a term for this but I dont know it), are violent? maybe they use Elon as proof, "people with autism are like nazis!" (right after they had supported his nazi salute). What YOU'RE saying could be used as evidence for it.

But of course, I'm policing random people on Tumblr.

Of course, making threats and saying it's a net positive to give somebody lifelong trauma is *perfectly fine*, and none of anybody's business!

How dare I discourse in the syscourse tag??????

/sarc

Please, worry about the punishment you think that MAGA deserves after they're not a threat. Maybe, you should try focusing on stopping what they're doing right now.

Genuinely, giving me evidence that some people also do terrible things does absolutely nothing to stop that you are also saying something *not good!*

Don't act as if by saying this, I'm somehow just ignoring US politics. Multiple things can matter. You can talk about two things.

I'm trans, I'm gay, I'm neurodivergent, I have OCD (can be argued for that I'm "inherently violent" because of common intrusive thoughts if they wanted to), I'm Jewish, I'm plural. We can't "look normal", and if everything goes as they plan, I'm the first one dead in my town, because people don't care if I live or die. They might point to my house and say "good riddance." I know what's going on in politics.

Talking about how you want to ruin people's lives and cause them to have mental illness does not help that literally at all. Neither of us are doing anything to help that movement by making these posts. My reblogs will not help anything. Your post will if anything, make things worse, because Tumblr is full of leftists anyways and you're telling the extremely few people here who might be able to change from being MAGA that you want to harm them for the rest of their life.

Evil thoughts: While the accusations that I'd want to traumatize people into becoming systems are obviously ludicrous... if there was a magic string of words so hurtful that it could inflict lifelong PTSD on MAGAts, I totally would use it.

But I'd actually hate for them to become systems from it. They deserve to be alone in their suffering.

[sinnbaddie]

Kkg nsfw writing (I guess?? Lol)

Kakagai not being official but having a non spoken exclusivity because it’s only and always been the other for them and that aspect surfacing specifically in their intimacy.

Thinking about Kakashi coming back from really long anbu missions and seeing Gai. All the suppressed want and need - the yearning for his smell, his voice his whole being and it overwhelming him to a point where they end up closed off in Kakashi’s apartment and fucking for a week straight because Kakashi can’t physically do anything but touch him and Gai being equally as obsessive and insane about him.

Their need for each other being identical to animalistic starvation. The kisses, the gripping, the holding, just being so rough and filled with need to burrow into the others flesh; the gazes they give to one another, inexplicably soft but holding so much hunger, like their survival depends on the feeling of the others skin, the others body rubbing against them, their moans and hot breaths making the want worse instead of better because they can’t get their fill no matter how many times they push inside the other to make them reach euphoria.

They touch and they feel and they yearn but it’s not enough. Its never enough and then 2 days go by and they’re still going at each other and then 4 and then 7 and then they finally, finally feel they intertwined their bodies, insides and souls together enough to where when they look at each other the burning passion of want is not but a simmer until next time the dial goes up to maximum and they lock themselves up together again

[loveableabomination]

Being ace but also being people-pleasing enough that I think I'm not ace cuz I like to make my partner happy...is a mind-fuck.

[ruvviks]

bones please spare some isaac facts...tell me about the vibes and lore and everything you want. also what's his fave blood type to drink if he has one perhaps..(i'm taking notes)

HEHEHE THANK YOU SM i have so much to say about this man. but also he hasn't existed for very long in my brain yet so there's still many things missing from his lore currently. but here is a start for you :^)

isaac is a couple centuries old by now and from a (currently unnamed) bloodline that's a bit different from other bloodlines. all vampires have double fangs, their puncture fangs which are the regular ones they use to draw blood with, and their venomous fangs, which only come out when they want to change someone. for isaac's bloodline, the venomous fangs are a lot smaller which makes them less painful to extend and the process is quicker; but at the same time, even the smallest mistake in dosage could kill a victim rather than change them. this is why his bloodline is very small in comparison to others and changing a human into a vampire is always done in a big ritual rather than on impulse, to make sure they get the right dosage. this is how isaac was turned into a vampire :(

his bloodline is also more likely to have their feral sense (uncontrollable mode in which they hunt for blood until they're no longer feral) activated which is why they have to feed regularly and CANNOT miss any meals unlike other bloodlines who can usually miss a meal or two. their feral sense can sneak up on them without a warning and it will cause them to go feral until either their hunger or their "urge" (something vamps get sometimes when they want to change other humans. it's like a vampire ovulation) is sated. this is why many vampires of isaac's bloodline are pretty rich or important people who have other vampires working for them to provide them with enough blood so they'll never go feral by accident

isaac is VERY different from his bloodline though. he grew up in a modest family somewhere in the east of the united states and after he was turned he hid himself away in an old abandoned chapel for many many years, feeding on wildlife and the occasional unfortunate soul who wandered too far into the woods. he ended up hunted down by heavenly, my other oc for this story, who is a vampire hunter but at that point was still very young and on his first ever vampire hunt without his father; heavenly was unable to kill isaac and let him go, after which isaac moved to jericho :]

jericho is a big city on the west coast of the united states and it's essentially a vampire hub, in the sense that the government knows about the existence of vampires but isn't telling the general public but the general public tends to also know about the existence of vampires but it's also not uncommon to come across people who've never heard of them. but at the same time it's also not a huge shock to find out that vampires exist. and in jericho there's many of them and it's like a safe haven for them. am i making sense here

anyway isaac runs a church in jericho now! it's less used as an actual church and more just a homeless shelter and general shelter and community center and food bank AND blood bank all in one, for humans and vampires alike, and he's a very important member of the community he lives in :^) he really wants to help people and improve lives despite the reputation of his bloodline

it's at the same time pretty dangerous for him to be in such a lively place because if he misses a meal even once he could go on a murderous rampage. but it's a risk he's willing to take, knowing he's making a difference and not wanting people to lose their stability in life because he decides to leave or something like that

i don't have much for the story yet but the idea is that heavenly shows up in jericho give or take 2-3 decades after first meeting isaac and they reunite :^) heavenly ends up helping isaac with the blood shortage crisis and also ends up as his personal blood bag because he's a freak and a weirdo who likes getting his blood sucked by vampires. and also he's gay for isaac. and i get him. me too

[izzy-b-hands]

I will be forever grateful i can be on this new med. it's one a lot of folks also need and can struggle to have access to! It's important i be on it, especially if i start doing any vid collabs

(some of which, really, all of which, i unfortunately actually need to cancel that were in the preplanning stages, bc the election results have me wanting to wait and see how the general atmosphere of the country is before i agree to meet up with anyone. I feel bad for cancelling, but also i just can't know for sure how safe things are/might be going forward and I'd rather avoid the potential of. ya know. various not great things that could happen at a meet up, tho i would certainly hope they wouldn't. i don't feel like actually addressing them rn, u guys know what i mean)

That said, if the truvada initial side effects could fuck off asap would be so lovely. three weeks at worst, then they should be gone/much better or so i am told. really hope that's true bc losing my mornings to being dizzy and nauseous is Not Working for me lmao. im on week two, and now understand why my new doc said to call if i needed any 'cheerleading' and support to get thru the side effects, bc apparently she's done that for several ppl to make sure they actually make it thru the three weeks and keep on it (lovely of her!!)