#being ace was bad enough but at least i can find romance right?

[inuxi]

that ask was rude of me, i should've just blocked you instead of telling you about it, i'm sorry. i'm aroace and sex+romance repulsed, and i guess i thought alastor was gonna be something i could enjoy for once like everyone else gets to without feeling like i'm intruding on a conversation i have no right to be part of. i'm on ios so i can't use browser extensions to actually get rid of all the alastor ship posts like i want, and i'm not sure my problem even has a solution short of just giving up trying, because so far i have found exactly zero blogs that are 1.) still active at all, 2.) still post about Hazbin, 3.) aren't actually 12 years old, and 4.) don't post about fucking Alastor ships. i got so excited seeing such good, recent art i haven't nuked yet considering how old every other post i can still see is, and i'm not kidding when i say i sent that ask through tears. it was rude and unacceptable either way, and i'm sorry.

i've blocked over 200 different people and i'm not exaggerating that number even a little bit. i would rather put a gun to my head and pull the trigger myself than see them so much as breathe next to each other ever again. i am so. so so so so so sick of searching and searching and searching and finding nothing.

the thing i've learned from alastor's aroace representation is that not only is the world as a whole not made to accommodate me, fandom space isn't either. i am an alien on a planet i was never made to fit into, and i don't even get to escape that through fiction like everyone else does. no amount of filtering and blocking and searching will bring into existence a community for me that simply does not exist, and it is futile for me to try. that's what this fandom has taught me.

i think the chances of me sticking around in this fandom are slim, so at least it won't be an issue for anyone else anymore. i think being excluded from conversations about an aroace character sting a lot more than just not being represented at all to be honest.

Okay, listen.

First of all, Alastor is officially an Ace, NOT an aroace. That means he can still be interested in any romantic things or finding a couple. No one is stopping you from seeing him exclusively as an aroace. But shaming people who don't share your point of view is a bad idea.

Secondly, I am an aroace artist myself. Romantic and sexual themes are virtually non-existent in my art. I can joke about it, but almost all of my drawings explore completely different things. And you come to me and try to talk about how hard it is to feel socially comfortable being an aroace? I understand your worries, but, again, trying to shame other people because they don't share your point of view is NOT a healthy coping mechanism.

Third, I have done THREE drawings in all my time that include a romanticized Alastor. Two of them were collabs, and the third was asked to be drawn by people. And these three drawings made you give up on my art, which you said you really liked?

The community is too heavily oriented towards romantic and sexual themes, it's true. People like us are often uncomfortable in that environment, that's also true. But aroace people can't just come in and ban others from having fun just because we don't find that fun or interesting.

Man, I'm not even Alastor's artist! What the kind of Alastor shipper am I? And you picked me out of a thousand people to block? Oh my God, that's as funny as it is sad.

In case you haven't looked at my art, I am a Lucifer artist. I very rarely draw Alastor, simply because I don't find him interesting enough. And because of that, I find it so funny to be labeled an “Alastor shipper”

[physalian]

I think being an ace writer lets me write sex and romance with less of my own biases/wants/what-I-think-is-sexy getting in the way, to better incorporate these scenes into the story as a method of plot and character development instead of just gratuitous, among other things. In the same way being atheist lets me write real and fantasy religions without my own beliefs interfering, because I can respect religion academically and objectively, as a tool, not a given.

I write my characters in tons of situations that I myself would never enjoy, anything from bathing together or having kinks or even making out. I know why people enjoy these things and I’ve read enough romances to know how to write the proper buildup and the right tone to strike and all that jazz and I do enjoy reading romance.

There’s absolutely other factors at play here and I can’t speak from experience for a lot of the situations I put my characters into (nor do I write smut, I’ve tried, I’m bad at it because I’m ace) but I’ll beta read sex scenes for original authors, especially cis/het authors, and while “writing to satisfy yourself or your readers” is different than straight up just writing a story that includes romance, I seem to keep finding myself stuck with a constant stream of author wish fulfilment, a lot of newbie original authors seem… narrow-minded when it comes to sex.

Like they can only imagine what they find kinky or romantic or sexy, like the subtext is saying “this is sexy because I think it’s sexy and if you don’t think it’s sexy something’s wrong with you”. Which isn’t at all a problem in fanfic for whatever reason (probably because these authors also tend to think sex=romance thus smut=character development).

So I have a character with a medical kink, for example. I haven’t had readers gushing over him or that scene (haven’t had that many readers period, mind you), but I haven’t had any complaints, either. Heck, my protagonist in ENNS is a frustrated virgin in a vampire romance who at one point realizes “hm yeah I definitely don’t hate teeth anymore pls do it again” meanwhile I’m sitting back with my metaphorical coffee going “you have fun now, enjoy”. Maybe because it’s not just an 111k word fantasy smutfest but his self-discovery is part of his arc.

But I think the difference is, either in just skill at my craft or being on the outside looking in, is that I think “what would he think is sexy? And how would I go about writing that?” vs “what do I think is sexy? And how do I go about contorting my characters to fit that?” I spend the time making sure he’s in character, it makes sense for his character, and that he’s acting authentically.

Or at the very least, I think aceness (and possibly aro-ness we are undecided in that department) gives you a baseline of 0, clean slate, not that aces can’t enjoy the idea of sex, the idea is that sexuality is self-contained. But when your whole life is sex-favorable/allonormative I think it puts blinders up.

Or, I just keep reading heterosexual romances that leave something to be desired. Not just beta-reading, the romances in like, Maas books, for example—no kinkier or more wish-fulfilling than a fanfic with the same tags, but there’s something so cheap and artificial about those sex scenes. The first time I read… I think it was book 3 or 4 of the TOG series and I realized just how much sex there was, I legit got bored and scanned ahead until I could get back to the story—and I have sat through fanfics that surpass 100k words with as much smut and I am fine and entertained. Is it because she’s not a great author, or because she’s a cis/het author with blinders up, or some mix between the two? I have enjoyed poorly written but sincerely written smut in fanfic, so it can’t be that, either. If this was a science experiment and I’m controlling for all other variables except the sexuality of the authors and/or characters, I’d have my answer.

That’s not at all to say allonormative authors cannot write beautiful romances and hot sex scenes. There is only one (1) romantic scene in Maas's books that I used to go back specifically to reread, and it was just two characters finally tossing decorum aside to make out. She lost me completely after that.

Just in my experience, inexeperienced allonormative authors vs queer of any kind tend to be worse at making it compelling and sincere and my theory is that they can’t escape their own ideas of what sexiness is, because they've never had to, and can't get in the minds of characters and readers who don’t all think like they do.

—

Interested in a queer vampire fantasy novel? Eternal Night of the Northern Sky is out now!

[aspecpplarebeautiful]

Hi there! How are you doing? I have some questions, well, a rant *plus* some questions.

I feel... safer with allo allies than I do with aro/ace communities (online). Does that make me aphobic/bad? I don't go by labels because for me, they're not necessary. If I *were* to label myself based purely on definitions, I would be aroace, specifically, demiromantic asexual. I used to go by this a while back.

I don't fit the stereotype of being aroace at all. I'll talk about the aromantic side. Unlike most arospecs i've seen online, I LOVE Valentine's day! I LOVE shipping! I LOVE consuming romance fiction. I LOVE romance et cetera et cetera and yet I don't experience it like allos do. I need a strong bond with someone in order to fall in love and it takes me really, really, long to do so. But once it happens, my love is not 'weak'. It makes me pass really well as allo because of this, but it makes a lot of people in the aro community mad because I'm 'stealing' a label to 'feel special'. I was always told I was not aroace, that I couldn't be aroace by definition. That I was alloromantic asexual pretending to be on the arospec. That I was too scared to be 'basic'.

On that topic, and I think this is unintentional, but... why is nobody batting an eye when an aro or an ace person shames an allo or calls them weird or basic? Because they're doing exactly what allo aphobes are doing to them. I had this conversation with a friend and he said, 'that doesn't happen, allo people don't get shamed especially by aspec people', yet, I keep seeing things like 'I fucking hate allos so much' and 'To all my aces, we're not like allos, we're better' or something along those lines.

Whenever I enter an aspec online space, I'm made to feel like an intruder because, as I said, my experiences are very similar to the allo experience EXCEPT for the fact that I don't feel romantic attraction unless a strong bond has been formed. I'm not saying the aroace community is bad in any way, don't get my wrong, I'm saying that there is a massive gatekeeping problem going around and so much bubbling hatred and separation, and I don't understand any of it. In a prefect world, I'd happily identify as aroace, but I feel ashamed to do so now.

The gatekeeping... the infighting, I don't want to hate the online community of which I'm supposed to belong but this... this isn't right. The allo allies don't do things like this. They don't make me feel insecure about myself. And yes, while I don't experience romance like an allo would, I feel safe around them. I need to ask, have you seen this too? Have you experienced this? Is this truly all in my head? What do you think?

I apologize for the vent or if I seem aphobic, I just really need answers and I'm tired of the constant hatred... How are you? Did you drink enough water? Did you sleep well today? Did you eat? Again, I'm so sorry if I made you uncomfortable with this!

Vents are totally welcome, Anon. Don't worry.

I'm really sorry you ran into gatekeeping, Anon. I feel like that's something that's really been on the rise especially over the last couple of years. It's a real issue and it causes a lot of harm. This should go without saying, but demiromantic people are aro, and have just as much right to be here as anyone else on the aro spectrum.

I do think at least part of the problem is social media in general and how things are set up these days. We don't have community spaces as much anymore, in particular we've lost moderated spaces where gatekeepers can be properly dealt with. And there's very little curation or organization. Things are chaotic and fragmented, and one person's experience and what kind of posts they say see may vary wildly from someone else's. There's also a competing needs issue, where one aro may need to vent about romance, another may need their romantic side validated and there's no way to organize so each can find the space they each need.

If finding aro spaces/blogs that are more accepting is important to you, Anon (and it's OK both if it is or isn't), my big advice would be seek out demiromantic blogs and posters specifically. There's some very good ones around and they'll be posting about aro things that are relevant to you, and even more importantly won't be gatekeeping demi identities.

For more aro-general blogs, there are ones out there that are also inclusive and anti-gatekeeping, but it may take a bit of work to find them. Be very liberal with your unfollow and block buttons. If someone is gatekeeping block on sight, but also if they're not posting the type of aro content that you need or want to see, you're allowed to organize things so you don't see their posts. Sometimes unfollowing is enough, but blocking also doesn't necessarily mean the other person has done anything wrong, it's just a tool to make sure you're not seeing a blog you don't want to see.

For the shaming allos question, I do think it's a complex topic. For me it depends on context. I definitely do not believe in any kind of ace/aro superiority, being ace and/or aro, or being allo are both neutral. Nobody's smarter or more moral or more pure or anything like that. But sometimes people say things as a vent in the moment and are reacting to a difficult situation they've been in. So for example someone may say 'allos suck' but it comes from a place where they've been very badly treated by allos for being ace or aro but they're referring more to the societal systems that are in place that privilege allo people and make life more difficult for ace/aro people, they don't actually believe being allo makes someone a bad person. (It can be hard to tell what's going on just from a post, again it's OK to unfollow and block, especially if it's just not what you personally need to see in the moment).

Personally I don't come across a lot of this type of stuff, but this is what I mean about things being fragmented, the blogs I follow just aren't posting about the infighting or gatekeeping and I don't happen to see it in the tags when I go in there. But I do hear about it second hand, and it seems like it's a problem on other social media sites I'm not on as well.

I'm sorry you've had a hard time, Anon. But I am glad you've found people you can be comfortable with and be yourself around. That's really important too. And thanks for the reminder that I really should drink more water today.

Hopefully at least some of this is helpful, but if you have more questions or want to discuss anything in more detail, feel free to send in another ask.

All the best!

[colourprinter]

Probably too personal thoughts, feelings, and ramblings around Our Wonderland

A couple of warnings, this will likely spoil all of Our Wonderland and this will likely get personal on the thoughts and feelings. It's a personal look (and total ramble) at this game more than anything.

If you haven't played or don't know what Our Wonderland is, I don't know how you found this but you can find it for free on this link.

To keep the spoilers hidden and to prevent forcing , I've put everything in the expand below.

I found this game from the Queer Halloween Story Bundle on itch, I was looking around what was in the bundle and enountered this game. I had already played a visual novel from the bundle that didn't gel too well with me so my hopes weren't too high.

I had no idea what this free game in a bundle had in store.

I was casual during the intro, I don't know when it hit but I knew I was locked in when act 2 hit and I saw what the meat of this game really is.

Something in this game sucked me right in, and wouldn't let me go.

I can't say I remember every detail but I was quickly emotionally invested, trying (and almost always failing) to keep Iggy alive and seeing how this friend group had completely gone off the rails, how their wishes twist around them.

Everything gave me the feeling I believe it was meant to, Gidget's advances on Iggy, Orlam, Buck's outright brutality, Genzou trying to get out alive while throwing the worst words at Orlam (I think he's just like that anyway) and Iggy having the worst time of his life.

While that doesn't sound like much, I don't usually get a reaction from a lot, the mix of visual and words hits just right... or wrong given how horrifying some of this is. Well, some things in the game would easily get a reaction...

For a bit of context for the next parts, I am aro/ace, something I truely discovered myself in the middle of a relationship, not that I hate being in a relationship but I think I'm completely incapable of feeling romantic love, there's just... nothing there. With being ace, I kinda resented the way my brain would react, litrally wishing sometimes that I was ace, glad I grew out of that for my own sake.

I also tend to feel awkward enough around sex in video games. I got goaded into the House of Hope scene, the first time the game crashed to save me and the second time I went dead slient and fixed my eyes down, only looking up enough to see the choices... I've now got an agreement to never have that happen again.

So obviously Gitget's sections got a big reaction from me, I thankfully haven't had any expriences close to anything like that, I could understand Iggy's perspective.

But enough about the horrible stuff for the moment, I'm not going to explain that, yes, seeing Orlam's and Buck's scenes were also shockers because eating human flesh and brutally murdering people are kinda bad things as well.

What I want to focus on next is something I currently only have one full perspective of, the romance. I usually verbalise everything to myself in RPGs and VNs, doing silly little voices for everyone (doing 6 children voices at the end hurt) so when I was given the choice of an ending... obviously, I chose the Genzou ending. Usually I'd feel awkward and stilted reading out the words but this time, it felt nice, I haven't done the other endings but I'm sure they're just as good, even if they're not, I got at least one good romance which given that this topples my fav VN romance (Slay the Princess which is pratically a joke romance anyway), I'm more than happy with it.

Niceness is over, I have another list topper, worst thing I've ever encountered in a video game, something so bad that even being foribly censored (I'm not checking if there's a visible version this time), it made me sick to my stomach. The tree and the infant in Her branches. Now I've played though and done some horrible things in video games, including child murder, but the way the body is described, the way everyone reacts to it. I can't call it anything below truely horrible and I'm putting this above freaking turn based RPG murdering children, I thought after that nothing would get me again (I think doing it actually knocked a screw loose because I've suddenly stopped being a goodie two shoes in video games, that's how bad that was). I mean this as a compliment but that is the worst thing I have ever encountered in any media.

And I think because I've felt these strong emotions where I haven't been hit so hard before, I've become completely pulled into it all. The fanwork contest was the first bit of my own art I put online in years and that kick started me getting back into art as a hobby, something I don't think I would have gotten back into if I didn't do that bit of Iggy art to prove to myself that I could do it if I put myself into it.

So... Carrot, thank you so much for this game of romance, fun, death and wishes.

If I land on my feet, I'd like to make a game with multiple acespec PoVs one day, much less horror though.

[badaceattorney]

-Extremely long pinned post! Everyone’s favorite!-

Welcome to Bad Ace Attorney. I post ideas related to Ace Attorney every day at noon, and I also post other ace attorney related stuff here. My main account is @hotsinglesmusic, and I also post warframe stuff now as @cephalonsugma.

You can (and should) submit your own ideas or just send me whatever you want by using my submission box or by sending me an ask.

Read below for guidelines on idea submissions, my FAQ, a list of tags I use in case you want to search/block them, and literally everything else you could think of.

Idea Categories

I sort all my ideas into formatted categories so that they have consistency.

A Case Idea is for:

The premise, theme, or murder of a case (50s Sci-fi themed case, The victim died eating a sandwich, All the witnesses seem to be ghosts)

Any sort of gameplay/story gimmick (you play as a prosecutor, you have to time your objections using a quick time event, Percieve but for speech patterns)

Any other specific event that could happen during a case (“Athena suddenly begins speaking in tongues” works, but “the judge can cast spells” would be a Character Idea)

A Character Idea is for:

An original character idea (Insert your OC. No really, feel free to send me your OCs. Just prepare for me to maybe roast them a little if I find a way to make it funny, unless you say you don’t want me to do that)

Any sort of name pun idea (a barber named Harry Styles, Minimalist named Leslie Moore, Lesbian catgirl named Kitty De Famme)

A variation/deviation from an existing character (The judge but with hair, Franziska but her whip is a charging cable, Pearl fey if she became a lawyer)

A Plot Twist is an occasional repost adding additional info.

Submission/Ask Guidelines

All idea submissions have to start with "Case Idea:" or "Character Idea:" and fit in that category. This only applies to idea submissions.

I might make fun of your submission/ask a tiny bit if I think of a funny way to do it, especially if you’re being hostile. If you don’t want me to do this let me know, but I wouldn't post your submission if I actually thought it was bad. This is just me joking around.*

Please don't send suicide jokes, rape jokes, racism jokes, or fat shaming jokes.** (Gay jokes and trans jokes are fine because I generally assume that if you're in this fandom and on tumblr you probably know enough about gay and trans people.)

If you think I’m hot/smart/funny/etc you have to tell me (sorry man, it’s the rules)

I will immediately delete any ask or submission that has nothing even remotely to do with ace attorney, my blog, my posts, or me.***

Any ask or submission that doesn’t follow the guidelines above will be answered/addressed privately if possible.

FAQ

Q: Why does your screenshot look weird?

A: Because I’m taking a picture of my monitor/screen and cropping it. I play on my Switch and moving photos/videos from there takes way too much effort. The only time I ever do it is when I really need to post a video.

Q: Why didn't you post my submission?

A: Either I’m extremely busy, in which case I can’t post it right now anyways, or it didn’t follow the guidelines.

Q: Can I make fanart of your posts/characters?

A: YES. DO IT. I will repost it and credit you because other people liking what I made brings me great joy.

Q: Why do you hate narumitsu/wrightworth?

A: I don’t, actually, even though I like Gumworth and Gumwright a bit more. I joke about being the number one narumitsu hater, but it’s grown on me after playing through the Apollo Justice trilogy. However, I sometimes have a problem with the way people talk about it.****

Q: Are you joking about thinking that (insert character) is hot?

A: I am always completely sincere about that specific thing. I do like to make jokes about it but that’s because romance/sex is inherently comedic and I know that my taste in men is slightly unconventional, at least for an Ace Attorney fan.

Tags that I use sometimes

#not a case idea:***** I usually add this tag to any post that isn’t a case/character idea, in case people aren’t interested in anything else from this blog, but I’m not really consistent with it.

#tgaa liveblogging: Me liveblogging my way through The Great Ace Attorney 2: Resolve. I didn’t liveblog the first game. I will use #aaic liveblogging when I get to that game.

#rants about ace attorney shipping: I’ve started using this tag for when I rant about ace attorney ships, as I often do. Earlier rants don’t have this tag.

#fangame stuff/#magnus cloue spirit attorney: Posts about my fangame, magnus cloue spirit attorney

#music: Music I made, usually for the fangame. I also make other music but this is only the ace attorney music.

#art: visual art, probably made by someone else in response to a post

#poll: Self explanatory

#___ my love: pure simping

Magnus Cloue: Spirit Attorney

I'm making an ace attorney fangame called Magnus Cloue: Spirit Attorney, using some of the ideas from this blog along with my own separate writing.

If you want to learn more, you can browse my #fangame stuff and #magnus cloue spirit attorney tags or send me an ask about it. I would love to include any OCs you have as part of the game if I can find a place to put them.

I’m currently looking for feedback on the writing/plot/characters as I make the outlines for the game’s script, but I also could use some help from writers/artists/2d animators/programmers who know how to use RenPy/musicians who can help me out with making the soundtrack.

Join the server below if you want to be a part of it, or even if you just want to hang out and talk.

—————

*Please try not to take anything I say here too personally unless I say I'm not joking. If you need clarification on if I'm joking, ask me and I will provide it.

**Unless they're actually funny, clever, and respectful, which sometimes they are. You don't need to censor yourself, but understand that after a certain point you aren't making parody, you're just doing the thing.

***If your charity/fundraiser/blog is actually related to ace attorney, me, or my blog I will consider it, but I will be extremely cautious. I’m not going to unknowingly be part of a tumblr scam.

****I think that sometimes the characterization people apply to is very unusual/makes the story worse, and I especially take issue with the way some narumitsu shippers treat ships like Gumworth/nokomitsu or Feeniris as completely invalid or even harass the people who ship them. Also, I think that sometimes people are way too quick to defend any valid criticism of narumitsu (even if it’s only perceived as criticism) rather than admit the ship is anything other than the most perfect ship ever.

*****the tag is called “not a case idea” because at the time I made the tag I had started this blog and there were only Case Ideas, no Character Ideas. I’m not going to go through every post on this blog just to change it to “not an idea”

[little-elf-wanders]

I'm also just going to preface that I rant about Solas a lot and I'm highly critical of him because he's apparently a character with a lot of power in how the rest of Thedas will survive or die. This doesn't mean I can't accept being wrong if I am, if he has a genuinely good plan he hasn't bothered to explain to anyone yet, I'll listen but so far... I'm not collecting breadcrumbs and calling it a cake.

I don't mean any of my posts to attack what you love, if you're a Solas lover/apologist, that's completely fine with me, I actually read and enjoy some of your takes about him. And you're all wildly talented. His character just rubs me the wrong way enough times that I just can't justify things away. That doesn't mean I entirely hate him. There are things I do enjoy about him, and that any character can illicit strong emotion in people isn't a bad thing to have. I'm truly hoping there's some secret I'm not in on, but I'm not hinging it all on being attracted to him, either. (I'm ace as fuck, which might be why I haven't been swept up in loving him. Because I know some - please read not all, majority of you have been very understanding -will defend him to the death simply because they love the romance. Or maybe they're hopeful and trying to find evidence to back it up. I just don't view him through rose tinted glasses and there's issues, he's a flawed character - none of this is a bad thing, it creates narrative, it's just the approach some fans take to it can be exhausting, on both sides.)

If it's been a big misunderstanding of Solas in general in Veilguard, I'll also be willing to accept that provided they give us more than 'trust me'. But as of now he's still a dick that isn't one all the time. And if he's an actual god, that explains why he's a dick. Though I believe it was said they weren't gods, their powers just came close. Which just means he's a very strong magister and thus, still a dick. A slightly less dicky version of the others but. STILL. There is substantial amounts to be critical about. And I will be.

This is just a PSA to say if you don't like me ranting about him, I'll make sure to have solas critical in the tags so you can blacklist it if seeing criticism of him upsets you, he's fictional at the end of the day so my rants don't mean I want to tear away your joy, just vent my own grievances in my own space. My intention isn't to upset anyone who loves his character. I have empathy for his character, it just... y'know. There's parts I wish could have been handled differently. Especially how we spoke to him because it was all, in my opinion, just ego stroking him. Which just isn't compelling to me nor what romance should be. (Though he was a late add to the romance roster so some things can't be helped.)

I know how serious people take this, which is the only reason I'm saying this now, and I'm only making this post just to make sure people understand criticism isn't hate or shitting on what you love - at least it's not intentional on my end. Because I have seen some feel like it's a personal attack. I'm saying it isn't for this blog. Love him to your hearts content, you could be right in the end. But you could also be wrong. My take is, regardless of what side you're on, you still cared enough to put in energy which isn't a wasted game or character, and it's enjoyable to see all the passion. But please also understand that being critical doesn't = scum of the earth wanting to kill your enthusiasm. And the fandom sometimes need to learn how to separate certain feelings when discussing subjects. I won't judge you for loving Solas or any other romance or character. But I will have my views of said fictional characters.

I'll make an active effort to be aware of how the criticism comes out. (This is just in case I have unintentionally upset anyone who's peeked in and thought I'm the worst because of it.) Fandom culture is just scary and my anxiety has been acting up because I know how loved of a character he is. Maybe this is a dumb post to make but. Can't be too careful. But also if you do want to discuss things, I'm always open to chat about it!

[sabo-has-my-heart]

hello hello :3 ive been LOVINF ur scenarios soo much lately!! do u think u could write some for zoro/sanji/ace/law dating gn!reader who is aromantic but enjoys dating and doing romantic things (ie. going on dates, kissing, cuddling)? they could either be in a queerplatonic relationship and also aromantic, or in a traditionally romantic relationship but reader doesn't *always* feel romantically towards them/attraction fluctuates? maybe u could include crewmates being a little confused by the nature of their relationship, or navigating the boundaries of a non-traditional relationship? if not thats okay! ik aro relationships can b hard 2 understand for some ^^

Aw, thank you, I'm so glad you like them. I actually finished this a lot faster than I thought. So I don't know much about being aromantic, asexual, demi, pan, whatever sex-romantical (IRL, I'm actually the opposite, I want a romantic relationship but am not particularly touchy). That being said, I did look it up. There's still a lot I don't understand but I tried my best. That being said, please, please, please, please, please! Tell me what you think and give me feeback. I can't learn if you don't help me.

Warnings: GN!Reader, Aromantic!Reader, queer!Platonic relationships

Word Count: 1200

     He’d been your best friend for years, or well, maybe friends wasn’t quite the right term. You weren’t just friends but you weren’t dating either. You enjoyed the comfort of romantic things, enjoyed the warmth of cuddling, enjoyed the fun of dates, but you didn’t have ‘those feelings’ for him, or anyone really. That being said, just because you didn’t feel like that towards him, didn’t mean you didn’t sometimes enjoy the activities included in such a relationship. Was he in the same boat as you as an aromantic? No. But he understood your desire for it and was close enough to provide you with the peace and serenity of such things. Sometimes, sometimes, you wished you could feel that way towards others. It would make everything so much easier if you did. You’d be able to actually date, to tell him you loved him in that way, people wouldn’t be confused by your relationship. They understood when you said aromantic, what they didn’t quite understand was being aromantic while enjoying romantic things. Even still, they did their best to understand, or at least not give you hell for it, you were you, you liked what you liked, that was what mattered. So they let you do what made you comfortable. 

Zoro

     He liked sleeping with you, sprawled out in the warm sun on the grass, one arm around you, one behind his head as you snuggled up to him and dozed off in his arms. Honestly, your relationship worked quite well with him. He hadn’t found anyone he felt that way for and honestly didn’t care enough to look. It wasn’t that he wasn’t interested in finding someone, just that he was focused on other things at the moment. That being said, he still enjoyed the comfort of having a warm body next to his, it brought a sort of… peace and contentment that he didn’t otherwise get. A relationship with a crew member was always a bad idea in his mind, nor was he interested in them; he doubted any of them were particularly interested in him or simply want to cuddle with him for the sake of physical contact. Well, Luffy might, but Luffy was… interesting. You were different though, the two of you were close enough to share a bottle of sake on a moonlit night and enjoy the romantic things but without needing to be romantic. You did have an understanding that in the chance that he found someone he felt that way for, he could break it off if necessary, but until it was necessary, he was more than happy to fulfill your need for romantic actions without the romance.

Sanji

     At first, he’d been a little hesitant. A relationship that wasn’t romantic? He’d understood that you were aromantic, but he didn’t quite understand your desire for romantic touches without the actual romance. Didn’t understand wanting to cuddle or kiss or hug but not be together together. That being said, as your closest friend, he’d listened to you and was at least open to attempt it on the condition that if he was uncomfortable, you end things amicably. You’d agreed, he was your friend, you understood that he might not be comfortable with such things just as you weren’t comfortable with actual romance. Surprisingly, he found your agreement to be more comforting than previously thought. There was a warmth and tenderness in holding each other, a sort of softness and care in the kisses he placed on the top of your head. The two of you even enjoyed cooking together, just without all the lovey-dovey romance that came with a romantic relationship. Moreover, you seemed to curb some of his womanizing habits. He still fawned over women left and right, but not quite as much. While he might want a romantic relationship at some point, at the same time, he really enjoyed what he had with you.

Ace

     Ace was all over the romantic-sexual spectrum. Some days he was more interested in men than women or vice versa, some days he didn’t want a relationship with anybody, other days all he wanted was sex. The boy’s romantic and sexual preference was so all over the charts it was hard to keep up. But there was one constant. His desire for human affection, his desire to be held. He was touch starved and wanted somebody to love him, romantically or platonically, he just wanted to be held or to hold someone. Meaning that a queerplatonic relationship worked perfectly fine with him. He got to hold you, got to be held, but he didn’t have to worry about stumbling around and being romantic. He could go on a date with you, but have it be comfortable, not stumbling over his words as he tried not to mess things up. The two of you were still friends, maybe slightly more than friends, but first and foremost, friends. This also meant that he had somebody looking out for him. Somebody who would keep him from falling face first into his food, but he wouldn’t have to be embarrassed because ‘oh what will they think of me’. Someone who didn’t mind his dumbass shenanigans and not fret over him getting hurt. Hell, you joined in! And with his whole son of Roger thing, he wasn’t entirely certain he wanted a romantic relationship, a romantic relationship, whether or not he had those feelings, would just complicate things, just make things harder. No, he really liked what you two had.

Law

     The doctor had never been particularly affectionate, meaning that when you came to him with this, he was confused as hell. Why him? He wasn’t cuddly, he wasn’t loving or doting, so why him? That being said, after your first time holding him, cuddling up to him, nuzzling against his chest, he found himself desiring more. He didn’t care much for romance, he wasn’t interested in it, he didn’t have a need for it, and he didn’t have a place for it in his life. He was a pirate and a surgeon, he was fairly cold to a lot of people, he’d done things that some people might call horrible, and he had other things he wanted to accomplish. Romance with anyone outside his crew was a no go and dating among crew members in such a small crew was inadvisable. As a doctor, he also understood the need for physical human affection and interaction, understood the brain’s need to be loved, even if you weren’t romantically interested. This fulfilled both of your needs. He still wasn’t very affectionate outside of his room or office. He didn’t go around holding you or kissing you, wasn’t particularly close to you, but when it was just the two of you, he enjoyed the feelings of keeping you close, of resting his head on your chest. Being the doctor that he was, he’d listened to plenty of heartbeats, but there was something soothing about the drumming in his ear. The crew knew that the two of you had taken to sharing a bed, they didn’t quite understand, but you and Law were happy in your strange non-romantic relationship, so they didn’t question it. 

[picnokinesis]

What LGBTQ topics are you not confident enough to write about? Or that you have no interest to write about?

Hmmmmmmmmm I mean, nothing really comes to mind? I think my interest hinges more on the characters than anything else, and thus my interpretation of the characters influences the kind of queer topics I tap into. I tend to skew towards asexual/aromantic themes as a rule simply because I'm aroace, sex-repulsed, and very tired of everything being about romance sksksk - but that doesn't mean I don't like writing about romance! I've definitely done that, and enjoyed it. Again, it kind of comes back to the characters - for example, I have very limited interest in writing the thirteenth doctor as a lesbian, simply because my read on her as being aro/acespec and genderqueer/agender is so important and personal to me - but that doesn't mean I don't have any interest in writing about lesbian characters. Case in point - at least two of the characters in the screenplay I'm writing at the moment are lesbians (there may be a third but she's not telling me if she's bi or gay, and tbh that's valid of her). I guess, regarding confidence, I would feel less confident writing about queer topics outside my own personal experience, simply because it's outside my personal experience - but that's a fixable issue, right? See: I didn't feel confident writing about transfemme characters, but then I wrote a human au fic where the doctor was transfemme, did a lot of reading around about it, and now I feel confident enough to have one of the lead characters in the aforementioned screenplay be a trans woman! And like, obviously I can infer a lot from my own trans experiences, so maybe that's a bad example - but you get me. I see it similar to writing about, say, a profession I don't know about. I approached writing thirteen as a trans woman in a similar way to how I approached her being a virologist skksksks and I knew NOTHING about virology and immunology. Now I know a lot!

I think the only topic I can think of that I wouldn't want to dip into really is stuff to do with queer sex, but that's because I cannot write about anything sexual. There's actually a story idea I had focusing on aspec characters, with a lead character who was fraysexual, and another who was demi - and I would love to write that but the plot is like, inherently built around sexual attraction and stuff like that SKKSKS and alas!! I would have a terrible time. It's actually a problem I have with finding asexual media in general - because so often asexuality is talked about in the context of sexuality (obviously), but then it means you get shows that are focused on allosexual characters and their allosexuality, with the ace character there in contrast - a good example of this would be s2 of Sex Education, I think? I've not watched it for obvious reasons SKSKSK but like I think that show sounds amazing and wonderful and I'm so glad it exists, AND that it includes ace rep!! But I can't watch it SKSKSKSKS RIP ME. Which is why I enjoyed Koisenu Futari SO SO MUCH because it was focused completely on asexuality and aromanticism (as well as like, showing experiences and emotions I'd felt in a show that I'd literally NEVER SEEN BEFORE and it was like, a gut punch. And also it was hilarious. Truly an aromantic comedy). ANYWAY. Hope that answers your question!

[scoups4lyfe]

Tag 10 People You Want To Get To Know Better

Tagged by @killerandhealerqueen ; thnx <33

Three ships: Taro/Sonoi; George/Hiromi; and Ace/Keiwa/Neon cuz those are the three right off the top of my head rn

First ever ship: Jasmine and Aladdin LOOL

Last song/album is: TXT Temptation album; Farewell Neverland

Last movie: The Little Vampire

Currently reading: Dracula 🤪

Currently watching: Code Lyoko, Kamen Rider Geats, Avataro Sentai Donbrothers, Revice Juuga Spin-off

Last thing you wrote: literally was working on my middle-grade children's book, "Antony and the Witch"

What you’re writing right now: currently working on a lot of nonsense LOL. I'll even add excerpts because I can't help myself <33. Since I'm including excerpts I'm putting it below the line ;).

[1] Antony and the Witch -- mentioned this one above, its a middle-grade fantasy fiction novel following young vampire Antony after his family essentially send him away/abandon him, he ends up at Nothing and Nowhere where he meets the infamous Witch of rumors. But she isn't the kid-eating monster they depict her as. Soon Antony has to make the choice of choosing to betray the Witch to steal her magic wish-granting ruby, or to abandon his family as they did him. And maybe he'll learn the that the real treasure was the family he found along the way.

my favorite scene:

I have so much I love from my Antony and the Witch book even though its a WIP LOL. I could share tons but I'll cap it there 🤪.

[2]Babybirds & Bad Decisions

This is a Jason Todd gen fic that I'm working on, where Jason loses his memory even after being thrown in the lazarus pit, and therefore has no idea where to take Damien when Talia tells him to take Damien to "his father". It follows their journey together to Gotham and the process of finding out who the Batman is, in order to deliver Damien to him.

[3] My third WIP doesn't have a working title rn :P. It's a cross between the movie/short story 'the Black Telephone' and Revice.

Where, Ikki ends up getting kidnapped in-place of Daiji when he happens upon the serial killer and serial kidnapper "The Deadman" trying to take his brother.

The last thing I can say I'm definitively working on is a horror-romance Y/A novel titled ADAM -- following a boy named Adam as he moves to a new town, almost dies, and ends up cursed. Now it's a race against time to find a way to break the curse before the evil lurking within the town takes notice. Or at least, before it has a chance to go after him.

(This was a terrible description of the novel LOL....) I won't add an excerpt of that because we already have enough of those here 🤪🤪🤪🤪🤪🤪🤪🤪🤪.

ANYWAYS

I know I'm supposed to tag 10 people but I'm both in lack of 10 people and in lack of the motivation to find 10 people, so I'll do the bare minimum and tag one person ;).

@indigoretsu

[aromantic-luigi]

hi op!! i hope you dont mind me adding my thoughts, i was typing this in the tags and then realized theyd be a little too long oops

i think you have a great point there. aromanticism and asexuality are seperate identities, although, they still do have many similarities, not only in concept but especially in the way theyre treated by society.

in my opinion, its a bit disrespectful and diatasteful to tag specifically aro posts as ace, especially when the people posting them are asking others not to. i think that the issue is that asexuality has been talked about a lot more in more recent years; not nearly enough as it should be, though its included in a lot of flag displays and pride merch and theres been a good handful of canonically ace/ace coded characters in media. the issue is that aromantcism is hardly talked about or recognized, and aro representation, especially characters who are allosexual and aromantic, are incredibly rare. asexuality is a bit more digestible for people, as the idea that sex is sinful and gross is already deeply rooted in society (not to say that we ace people have it easy - theyre still shamed for it and face oppression, though people are at least a little more accepting of it). Aroaceness is another step from that. People find it weirder, since the idea of not feeling either of those types of attraction is baffling to people, but it still makes somewhat sense, so people are often accepting of that as well. the problem is that people have a very hard time accepting alloaro people, since how on earth can someone feel sexual attraction but not romantic attraction? sex is considered a sin and youre honorable if you never have it, though romance is overglorified and, well... romanticized, lol. society describes it as pure and wholesome and wonderf and neccessary and ideal!! (and of course, this leads to very harmful stereotypes about alloaro people.) asexual flags are common, though i hardly ever see aromantic flags in flag displays, pride merch, or even queer-made pride items.

thats why its frustrating to see specifically aromantic posts tagged as asexual. while many people in the aspec community identify as both, its isolating to the people who dont.

i feel like adding asexual experiences onto aromantic posts is a bit of a gray area. again, youre absolutely right - there are many similarities in aromanticism and asexuality where it makes sense to relate the experiences of the two. but at a certain point, its almost as if all aro posts are now aroace posts. (in contrast, ive seen way more ace-specific posts than aro-specific posts.) its a problem when aromanticism is only ever accepted when coupled with asexuality, while asexuality is frequently talked about often with emphasis on "asexual people can still be romantic, by the way :)!"

so... honestly i cant really say that its right or wrong to add onto aro posts. adding aro experiences onto ace posts? i would argue thats perfectly fine, unless the poster says otherwise, only because asexuality is more represented. of course im not saying anyone is evil or has any bad intentions when adding onto aro posts, i dont believe anyone means any harm when adding ace experiences, but i hope it makes sense why aromantic people are a little frustrated when all of their experiences are always equated to being aroace. its a little disheartening when people cant have their own space even in online spaces theyve tried to make for themselves, yknow? just my two cents :] i am only one person, my opinion is not fact obviously and i hope im not coming off that way!!!

(this is all written by an aroace person, if that means anything. im not here to pick sides - im on both!)

It's so frustrating how aromantic people and asexual people have been divided in the community because we refuse to respect how these identities relate and how they are different. How hard is it to respect a "do not tag with ace" at the bottom of an aro post, but equally not refusing to let aro posts be derailed by an ace viewpoint when that is simply the nature of this website and how posts are made. You guys know we both exist in the same space and we can be respectful of each others boundaries while also not closing each other off completely by acting like there is no correlation in experience at all?

Of course if nothing else is added it's disheartening to see someone tag something unrelated. But also why are people so against someone changing the conversation to something that is related or similar? I don't understand how you people are so against conversations?

[creune]

Sometimes people forget to grow up and it shows

I don't mean that people are childish or something like that, I don't mean plushies, cartoons or whatever hobbies people claim to be childish nowadays (I refuse to use social media outside of this one, and I solely use it to rant, ramble and talk when I can't sleep)

I mean like

Actual growth

Like, realizing that certain behaviors are bad and it can hurt them or others around, failing to look at what is and isn't important in favor of the childhood ideation of a "prince charming" or whatever else, not knowing that growing up isn't just getting a job or being tall, but about emotional maturity as well

Specifically, what confuses me today, is people's views on romance, love and relationships

I am probably mostly confused cause I am a demu person who thought was ace for almost two decades so a lot of the stuff like "type" or "down bad for xyz" or the need to have someone

I got lucky, I wasn't even looking at all when I found someone

And I most likely never look for this in my life (and not just because I do believe this relationship is going to last, but because, again, I'm demi, I don't really look for it, I don't feel it unless some heavy criteria is fulfilled called "complete trust and comfort/safety with someone")

But enough about me

Let's talk about everyone else for a moment, and the childlike mentality which I don't think does anyone any good

When people read a lot, watch a lot of shows or consume any kind of media, they tend to get fictional crushes, right?

And it can and does bleed over into what type of people they are attracted to in real life, influencing their attraction to certain characteristics, at least as far as I can tell

Cause this is where the growing up and the looks on romance start to become

Less good

At least, when certain characteristics are unhealthy, toxic, abusive etc.

It came to mind when I had some conversation with some friends who do have a yearning for a partner, one has a potential mate, the other not even that

So some stuff came up and types were discussed

All fine and good, but I have been getting some weird vibes that I just put in the back of my mind cause I had other stuff to deal with at that moment

But I remembered and found it kinda strange

It was about how, not just in fiction but even in real life, they preferred mentally damaged/scarred people

How they found it hot

How someone hurting themselves made that person more attractive to them

Kinda freaked me the fuck out internally, but again, had other stuff on my mind

I do believe that you should want your partner to be happy and comfortable with you, that you should help them and they should help you when it comes to being alright

And I get wanting to help people or giving them comfort, that's one thing

But finding people hurting sexy is another

And the more I notice that trend, of fictional crushes influencing people's tastes, the more I realize that it's pretty common

Which is disturbing to me for, hopefully, understandable reasons

Especially as I see more and more people excuse abusive behavior in fiction because the character doing it is "hot" or they're "just traumatized and it's okay"

And that makes me ask the question "will people excuse this behavior in real life too? Will they think it's okay?"

Apparently the answer seems to be yes

And I don't mean being manipulated into accepting it, but looking at it from the get-go as "hot"

And yeah, I do understand bdsm culture, but in this instance I don't mean that or the kinks where both parties are unharmed long therm like biting or choking or something like that

I am talking about actual, genuine abuse

I truly do worry for those friends

Especially when I can't be sure they're mature enough to understand the difference, that they will be smart enough not to jump into something that hurts them just to have a partner and then believe it not just okay but "hot" when they're being beaten, berated or worse

Because I do believe that some of this stuff at least, is because they haven't matured, haven't grown up yet mentally

They're adults but lack a level of understanding and responsibility

And I don't just say it like because of this, but because of a ton of stuff they did and the ways they acted when I met up with them just a few days ago

Not being able to separate a criticism/opinion of something they like from being told they're hated, not accepting different opinions of something they love, not hearing warnings or ignoring questions that are important to understand, being oblivious when they overstep and refuse to accept no as an answer themselves, splurging on unnecessary things and having to worry about it later on, only thinking of extremes as possibilities

And some specific stuff with the potential partner of one of theirs, which I hope I'm wrong about but I still worry

All you need to know is that this entire friend group is lgbt+ and this potential partner is very much, not too friendly to the group, willing to learn which gives me hope, but only when being spoonfed information and refuses to try to learn by themselves, and just has a pretty different world view from the friend, which is okay to an extent, but considering the context of the friend being part of the group in question, yeah

I think you see my worry there

I call this person a potential mate because they and the friend have not discussed their standing and refuse to until my friend visited their place, on the other end of the country, while their family does not know where they are (that last bit was my friend's own doing but still, this country isn't the safest, my friend should know better)

This person keeps getting banned from the game they play together for being such a toxic ass that they keep being reported for it and the potential mate does not understand why it keeps happening, and is genuinely confused

My friend quoted a message, in a "cute" voice: "I didn't even tell this person to kill themselves, why am I banned" which is just immature in my opinion but also what else will they "not understand"?

And there's some more but you get the jist

No proper communication and established boundaries, with expectations on both end which can be very different expectations

But it's all fine because they're "nice" and "understanding" and, you guessed it "bwokwen uwu"

I don't know details about that but I do believe it's mental health stuff

And a dash of "I want to be with someone, I do not care"

Like

When someone talks about meeting someone they like and the one thing they can bring up as exciting or cool is they will "stop being repressed (read: can fuck finally)"

There's nothing wrong with feeling free, with being able to break out

However when that's the only thing you can think of, I do think that might be a bit too early for a serious relationship

It might just be me tho, as I can't even imagine kissing someone without enough trust, more less hop into a whole ass relationship

My other friend is just truly down bad and believes that anyone that smiles in their direction might be interested in a relationship

Which, in my opinion, is pretty damn stupid

Especially when those people are getting payed for it, like waiters/waitresses and the like

Which is a huge reason why I fear that if anyone gives this friend any attention, they will be way too easy for any abusive asshole to take a hold of them

Plus they are convinced that prisoner/prison guard type romace is actually romantic and that it's all good and that power dynamics don't matter which is especially concerning

But again

I might just not understand romace and crushes and lust and all that

I mean, truly, what do I know?

I've never felt like I had to have someone by my side

Maybe it's just normal behavior and maybe these things are all okay and I'm just completely misunderstanding it

Maybe people really don't talk about the serious future until they have established a proper relationship, or it's normal to think everyone who gives you attention loves you or to believe suffering in real people is still very sexy

Maybe it isn't and I'm right to be concerned

Maybe it's in the middle somewhere

I genuinely don't know

I can't even really imagine what it must be like to yearn for something like that

Like, I wouldn't trade what I have for the entire world, don't get me wrong

I love my partner more than life itself

But, if I never met em, I wouldn't be looking all around for someone to be there

Or if things end, I would just continue life as usual

I can't imagine why people care more about having a partner than their own happiness

Especially from the perspective of having a healthy one, and wondering why people would rather settle than be patient to reach this height of happy

Like

For anyone wondering

The right one definitely isn't gonna beat you, call you names, want you to give up your hobbies, destroy your confidence, invalidate your being or force you to follow through with life-changing decisions, like having kids or moving somewhere specific or whatever

It's more like, life's a carriage you both pull, sometimes one of you will have to pull harder to help out the other, but then the other will do the same for you as well

But as it stands, I swear, all this media about abusers being romanticized and people saying their life is in ruains when they don't have a romantic partner and stuff is rotting everyone's brains and muddying the real life image of actual, true love that everyone deserves but not everyone gets to experience

As long as people can't differentiate between what they find hot in fiction and real life and what is and isn't okay in real life, it's gonna be a fucked up journey for many

[girl4music]

Wednesday Addams is also a character that is morally grey in that her actions are very questionable but she expresses very black and white. There’s no balance.

The people she now surrounds herself with in Nevermore Academy (especially Enid) will bring out of her character important information. Detail that will help her discover who she really is and what she’s really meant to be doing. Morticia was right about that. The school will change her and it’s up to her to decide whether that change is for the better or worse. The deciding of that will be part of the evolution she will inevitably have going forward in the show. I’m sure her parents always encouraged her to be outgoing but I can only see a sheltered child at the moment who does not know of human experience outside family.

This show is a coming of age story. And that’s not necessarily a bad thing so long as it can cut back on the stereotypes of teen cult shows. Namely the romance/sexuality aspects. Not that she shouldn’t experience that too and discover whether it’s right for her or not. She should. But they shouldn’t make it such a focus. Because this character is interesting by herself. Just her being apart of an environment that she’s not at all used to will make for great art/entertainment. You do not have to push love/romantic storylines in our faces. If love/romance naturally develops - fair enough. But in that case, you have to find someone compatible with her in the sense that they can complement her eccentric personality. Her dry humour. Her penchant for morbidity. You already have that character in Enid. And I’m all for a love/romance between them so long as it’s written well. Meaning it needs to make sense and feel right within the context of the then-storyline and the development of both character’s individual arcs.

Even though I think it makes the most sense for Wednesday I know I’m not going to get aroace representation. I’ve already accepted that I’m not. I know it’s not going to happen because Netflix aren’t that cool. But in that case - I don’t want any love/romance for her character forced or contrived. I want it built up slowly, conscientiously and naturally. I want it to be a fundamental part of Wednesday’s overall growth as a character and not just some cheap throwaway plot like it was in Season 1 with Tyler. So yes, I agree with the Wenclair shippers. Enid is most definitely the best option for facilitating this. My only ask then if they go that route is that they don’t make it out like having no romantic attraction and/or relations is wrong or odd in anyway. ‘Cause if I’m not going to get the representation that I primarily want in Wednesday, the least I expect is respect for and to aro and ace people because I know there’s plenty of them that relate to and resonate with this character because she exudes aromantic and asexual by default. Which is why I foolishly thought that we’d finally have an aroace defined character in Wednesday Addams.

But this is Netflix. We’ll be luckily if we get Wenclair. It’s not completely out of the equation like aroace is… but it’s a big ask to make their new “IT” girl gay or bi. I’m sure Jenna and Emma will be down for it though and that’s half the battle won as if as I’m concerned.

[a-small-batch-of-dragons]

Perfectly Fine

Prompt: Hi! I would love to read something from you featuring asexual Remus! - anon

it is project onto fictional characters hour my dudes

Read on Ao3

Warnings: discussions of the reality of being a sex-repulsed ace in a very allo world, nothing explicit

Pairings: none you heathens

Word Count: 1358

It takes them longer to figure it out than it should have and honestly, that’s on them.

But Remus is Remus, and that's perfectly fine.

It takes them longer to figure it out than it should have and honestly, that’s on them.

So it’s no secret that Remus’s particular sense of humor is equally as derived from what he finds funny and what makes the others the most uncomfortable. Logan did an analysis of it once and the results were 49%-51%. Which one is which varies but the quantities are incredibly consistent.

The trick is figuring out that the balance applies to Remus too.

And sure, the idea of Remus being uncomfortable is…difficult to remember sometimes, given that, you know, he’s Remus, but it’s there! It’s worth remembering! He’s a Side too! But considering his metric for ‘uncomfortable’ is wildly different from everyone else’s, it’s easy for them to overlook it. Maybe he gets some excitement out of grossing himself out too, maybe there’s a sick thrill in seeing just how close he can get himself to vomiting, honestly, who knows. Remus is Remus and that’s perfectly fine.

So here’s the big one that, again, took them way too long to figure out.

Remus is asexual. Not just asexual, sex-repulsed asexual.

Let’s reiterate: Remus is Remus and that’s perfectly fine.

It just…took them by surprise, is all.

“Wait,” Logan says, adjusting his glasses, “you’re asexual?”

“Those are the words I used,” Remus says, his head hanging off the couch.

“I—I heard you, I am…simply surprised,” Logan settles on, closing his notebook and setting it aside. “I would not have guessed that Thomas’s Sides would have different sexualities or romantic orientations.”

“What does it matter, Pocket Protector?”

“It doesn’t, it’s interesting to me.”

“Does that mean that all of us could potentially have different sexualities?” Patton’s head pokes above the counter as he digs for the good muffin tray—not the one Janus swiped three hours ago, of course not—in the cabinets. “Or no?”

Logan shrugs. “I imagine it would be possible, though I find it likely that at least some of us share Thomas’s.”

“My ears are burning,” Roman announces, plopping onto the couch next to his brother, “what incredibly gay thing are we talking about now?”

“Yeesh, Princey,” Virgil mutters, recovering from flinching horribly into the chair, “don’t do that, you scared the hell outta me.”

“Sorry, Virgil.” Roman taps Remus’s leg, hanging up over the back of the couch next to his head. “Why’re you upside-down?”

“Why’re you right-side up?”

“Remus…prompted a discussion on sexualities,” Logan says carefully, sparing a glance at Remus, “and we were debating the question of if we, as Thomas’s Sides, all have different sexualities.”

Remus kicks Roman in the head. “Told them I’m ace.”

“Oh, that makes more sense.”

“Really, and here I thought Remus beginning a complex introspective conversation was the height of character accuracy.”

“Payback,” Virgil sniggers as Roman startles horribly as Janus appears from behind the couch. “All jokes aside, I’m with L, I, uh, didn’t expect Remus to be ace.”

“Why not?”

Janus scoffs. “Couldn’t be the number of sex jokes you make on a daily basis, not at all.”

Remus shrugs.

“I think it’s just surprising considering how comfortable you are making the jokes, kiddo.”

“The fuck makes you think I’m comfortable with them?”

“Lang—what?” Patton’s head pops up again.

“A wild Patton appears!”

“Has Thomas…ever been interested in Pokémon?”

“What do you mean, comfortable?” Patton tilts his head, focused entirely on Remus and not the others making Pokémon jokes. “Are—are you not comfortable?”

“Remus isn’t exactly known for his ‘comfortable’ sense of humor, Padre,” Roman says, leaning back on the couch to make eye contact around Remus’s legs.

“But—but that—hold on.” Patton stands up—“ah! More Wild Patton!”—and puts his hands on the counter. “Remus, why would you make jokes that make you uncomfortable?”

Remus eyes him from upside-down. “Why does anyone do anything?”

“Sheer, absolute boredom, yeah, yeah, we get it,” Virgil sighs, “but it’s a good question, Remus.”

Remus just shrugs, only for it to dislodge him from his precarious position and slide toward the floor. Roman watches him collapse into a graceless heap and rolls his eyes, lying down on the couch.

“Hey! You stole my spot!”

“You’re the one who moved. Hey—!” Roman squawks in surprise as Remus throws himself on top of him. “You’re squishing me!”

“Too bad for you.”

“Remus,” Janus says softly, “are you…does sex make you uncomfortable?”

“Like maggots are crawling through my bones!”

The living room is quiet for a moment, enough to make Remus push himself up and stare around at them.

“What?”

“Sex isn’t something shameful, Remus,” Patton says patiently—and wow, isn’t that a surprise— “I promise.”

Remus rolls his eyes. “I know that, it just makes me want to rip all of my skin off and start over.”

“Why?”

“It’s bad enough I have to live in this meat sack,” he grouses, flopping back down and eliciting a soft ‘oof’ from Roman, “don’t need to be consciously reminded of it.”

“...‘meat sack?’”

“Oh, sorry, Lolo, ‘flexible container of mostly water.’”

“That’s not—well, yes, I suppose that is more accurate,” Logan says as he adjusts his tie, “but why would you choose to refer to your body as a meat sack?”

Remus shrugs. “’S not like I’d choose to be in this fucking thing. Evolution fucked up when it made us this way, at least we aren’t fucking horses. Oh, hey—“

“No,” Roman interrupts, “no jokes about that.”

“Spoilsport.”

“Remus?”

“What do you want, Snake-Face?”

“Are you…uncomfortable with your body?”

“Every day! It’s awful! I wish I didn’t have one!” At Janus’s muffled noise of heartbreak, Remus cranes his neck to look up at him. “Oh, relax, I’m fine, discomfort is part of my existence.”

“But it shouldn’t have to be.”

Remus huffs a sigh when he realizes that everyone else is looking at him with a similar amount of concern. Well, except Roman, but Roman gets it so that makes sense.

“I may or may not be being slightly dramatic, I am fine.”

“Can confirm,” Roman hums lazily, “comes with the Creativity gig.”

“Look, I just don’t like that it’s—it’s—“ Remus’s gaze lands on Patton— “look, Cookie Monster over there is allergic to cats, right?”

Logan frowns, glancing back and forth between them. “Yes, what does—“

“He’s not gonna die from it and he can still be around them, he’s just hyperaware of when there are cats and he can’t spend a lot of time around them without being really uncomfortable, right?”

Logan blinks in surprise. “Yes, I understand what you’re saying. Very clever analogy.”

“I am Creativity, you nitwit.”

He rolls his eyes fondly. “Of course.”

“So,” Virgil says cautiously, waving a hand at him, “you’re…good?”

“Yep. Goody-goody gumdrops, that’s me.”

“As long as you never say that again, fine.”

Roman gives him a hug. “I’m proud of you, Re, coming out is hard. Especially when you have to give people a vocabulary lesson when you do it.”

“Thanks, Ro-Bro.” Remus’s grin widens. “Does that mean I get to pick the movie for tonight?”

“What? No! It’s my pick! Hey! Hey!” Roman squeals as Remus starts to poke his belly. “Don’t! Dohohon’t!”

“Let me pick!”

“No!”

“Boys,” Janus sighs, reaching out and using his six arms to separate the twins, “that’s enough. Roman, what movie are we watching?”

“Pacific Rim.”

“Hey, wait, that’s what I was gonna pick!”

“See? There you go.”

Logan perks up immediately. “Does this mean we finally get to watch a movie with no romantic subplot?”

“And batshit physics.”

“We can overlook the batshit physics.”

“Whoa, L, what happened to you?”

“I…may have a greater appreciation for the cinematic depictions of the machinery.”

Patton just rolls his eyes and gets back to searching for the muffin pan. No movie night is complete without fresh baked goods. Ah, there it is, although he could’ve sworn he looked there a few moments ago…

Anyway, they end the conversation in the same place it started.

Remus is Remus, and that’s perfectly fine.

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[ursaminortarot]

I’m really fixated on romance right now for some reason, so here we are with a soulmate reading. I’m of the belief that we don’t just have romantic soulmates but platonic and familial ones as well. However, for this reading, I am choosing to focus solely on romance.

I’m experimenting with a new format. I linked each of the readings to a google doc, this is mostly because they ended up being way longer than I’d anticipated (story of my life). I also thought that it might be more organized to do it this way. I’d appreciate feedback on whether or not I should keep doing it.

Piles to choose from:

Pile 1 - Cobra

Pile 2 - Fish

Pile 3 - Cheetah

Pile 4 - Zebra

Pile 5 - Hawk

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[Decks Used: Modern Witch Tarot, Wild Unknown Tarot, Wild Unknown Animal Spirit oracle, Tarot Cats, standard playing cards, and a homemade oracle deck]

This took me 10-11 hours to do, spread out across 3 days. So, if you can support my shop or donate I’d be grateful. Also, please excuse any grammar/spelling mistakes and small incoherencies, by the time I got around to editing the readings I was kind of over it.

My Shop: https://www.etsy.com/shop/UrsaMinorTarot

CashApp: @UrsaMinorTarot

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Pile 1: Cobra

Who They Are:

Queen of Wands, 9 of Wands, 8 of Pentacles, King of Clubs

10 of Cups, 7 of Cups r, Justice r, 5 of Hearts

7 of Cups r, 9 of Pentacles r, 6 of Wands, 9 of Diamonds

Death r, 7 of Wands r, 8 of Wands r, Ace of Spades

The High Priestess, The Fool, The Hanged Man r, Ace of Hearts

Mother of Cups r

Winter+New Love

I’m getting some self-made energy here, they are likely a very hard worker who puts in a lot of time and energy. Their success, while appreciated, makes them feel very alone. There’s a lot of wands energy here, so they are generous with their money and it’s possible that other people take advantage of that. The Mother of Cups reversed reinforces this idea as she brings the message: “you give too much of yourself to others”.

The High Priestess, Fool, and Hanged Man being pulled together makes me think they function in two very different ways. Either, they overthink literally everything to the point of never making a decision, or they just do things very impulsively without a second thought.

They want a big, happy family, whatever that means to them. It could involve having children or just having a lot of pets. However, due to past relationships, they no longer feel as though they could trust anyone enough to live out that dream. 

They feel disillusioned with love, which gives them a lot of conflicting emotions. Because, again, there’s a lot of wands energy, so they’re a very passionate person. Their current belief that love isn’t real is a direct contradiction to who they are at their core. Winter and new love could be taken literally, like you’ll meet and fall in love with them in the winter. Or, if you wanted to look deeper at it, it could mean that you help them get out of this place of being unable to consider love.

How You Can Recognize Them:

8 of Cups r, Son of Wands, 7 of Wands r, King of Diamonds

5 of Pentacles, Father of Cups, 3 of Swords, Jack of Hearts

The Devil r, The Fool, The Devil, 2 of Spades

10 of Pentacles, The High Priestess r, Queen of Hearts

The Hermit, 7 of Pentacles r, 10 of Cups r, 7 of Diamonds

Hanged man, 4 of Cups r, 10 of Diamonds r

“You’re having trouble getting in touch with your emotions”

“You’re not seeing clearly”

Ex

This person has an unmistakable light about them. Being with them is like sitting outside on a nice day soaking up the sun. However, they are still holding on to the past, and this is to their detriment. When you meet them, if you haven’t already, they will be extremely hung up on their ex. They are going to be obsessing over what went wrong and whether or not they can fix it. I can’t tell if they want to fix it to get back together with their ex, because they think it will give them closure, or because they think it will help them avoid making the same mistakes in their next relationship. But, they also don’t actually want to fix anything because that would mean confronting their emotions and they would really rather not. They will likely seem to be existing outside of reality, they are going to be so distracted by this internal conflict that they aren’t going to notice the world around them.  

In all honesty, they will be very difficult for you to recognize. You’ll probably notice them because of their light, but you won’t (and shouldn’t) consider them a potential partner - at least not until they’ve dealt with their issues and moved on. I want to stress that while they are so focused on their past relationship(s), that’s not all they have going on. They are a 3 dimensional human being like the rest of us, but this is just the information I was able to get.

I also want to mention that their family is very important to them, they’re the type of person to call or text each member of their immediate family every day. I also get the impression that you two will be friends for a while before getting into a relationship. 

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Pile 2: Fish

Who They Are:

Queen of Swords, 9 of Wands, 9 of Cups r, The Tower r, Jack of Spades

King of Swords, Daughter of Wands, 3 of Pentacles, 8 of Diamonds

Judgment r, 2 of Cups r, Daughter of Swords r, The Chariot r, 3 of Spades

5 of Pentacles, Temperance, 7 of Wands, Jack of Hearts

The Emperor, 8 of Pentacles, The Magician r, Ace of Wands, 4 of Spades

“I’m sorry”

Best friends 

Between the Emperor and having all of the court cards of the Swords suit, this person has a very powerful presence. They’re almost the kind of person that makes people stop and stare, I say almost because they’re intimidating and people don’t want to be caught staring. Not intimidating in a scary way, they just - and I can’t stress this enough - exude power. They are also very ambitious and highly intelligent. So when they put their mind to something, they will execute it perfectly. Or, at least, they want people to think it was done perfectly. They have a very “everything’s under control” look to them, but they’re barely hanging on by a thread. I feel like one bad day would send them into an existential spiral, because they don’t know who they are if they’re not perfect. 

Nothing’s ever come easily to them and they’ve had to fight their whole life to get the things that they have now. They’ve never had the option of giving up. If they gave up, they were worthless, they were nothing - that’s how they’ve always seen it. I imagine there’s a lot of parental pressure at play here. It’s turned them into a workaholic, there’s no work-life balance to be found. I’m getting the impression that the “I’m sorry” card has to do with this aspect of their life. 

The “best friends” card speaks for itself. With the Jack of Hearts and Daughter of Wands, there’s a playful energy to them. But these are the only cards pointing this out, which tells me that they restrain this part of themself. I think that you being their friend, as well as their partner, will show them that they don’t need to be so serious all the time. This is something buried so deep it’ll need some time and energy to be coaxed out of them.  

This is pretty obvious, but this person’s biggest fear is failure.

How You Can Recognize Them:

Knight of Wands r, 4 of Wands r, 8 of Cups, 9 of Swords

King of Pentacles, The Moon r, 7 of Swords r, Queen of Spades

5 of Pentacles, Mother of Swords, Queen of Wands, 4 of Hearts

Queen of Cups, Daughter of Swords r, Knight of Wands

7 of Cups r, Son of Swords, 4 of Pentacle, 5 of Diamonds

The World r, 9 of Wands r, 8 of Hearts r

You feel as if you aren’t getting the recognition you deserve

Seperation

We’re definitely seeing their more sensitive, playful aspects. However, these are still vastly overpowered by their Swords energy as, once again, all the court cards are out - the Queen’s out twice. Seriously, this person has such powerful energy that it’s the first thing you notice.

I feel like you’ll meet either at work or at school, somewhere where you’re working on a group project together. The people you’re working with aren’t going to take your contributions seriously. But, once they realize you’re right, they’ll claim they were  their ideas all along. The Swords family is very fair-minded, so I think this person’s going to have a problem with that.  

They have this very detached, uninterested persona and once you’ve spent time around your soulmate, you’re going to pick up on the fact that they are deeper than they want people to think they are. When they’re more comfortable with you, which will take some time, you might catch glimpses of them being competitive/hot-headed or they’ll start making jokes around you. If you’re patient enough, they’ll eventually be vulnerable with you.

They have a fear of the unknown and love is foreign to them, so this is definitely a slow-burn. 

In both of these readings I got a wave of pretty interesting energy. It wasn’t anxiety or dizziness, but felt similar to both. I felt like I lost my balance, that’s probably how you'll make this person feel. They have a lot of plans for life and you’re not one of them, so they’ll be thrown for a loop. 

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Pile 3: Cheetah:

Who They Are:

Page of Swords r, Son of Cups, The Hierophant, 9 of Clubs

Page of Wands, Mother of Wands r, Page of Cups r, 4 of Hearts

9 of Cups, The Tower, 2 of Swords, 2 of Cups, Ace of Clubs

Queen of Wands r, The Chariot r, Queen of Pentacles, 4 of Spades

Knight of Pentacles, Ace of Wands, Emperor r,  6 of Clubs

8 of Cups, King of Wands

You can’t help everyone

Over-investment in work

Aries

The first thing that I’m seeing is that this person will probably have some self-esteem issues. It seems to be tied to their abilities more so than appearance.

They have a lot of ideas for projects that they want to work on, but they never seem to start anything, let alone finish. I think this is because they try to be everything to everyone and don’t prioritize themself. They find contentment in the idea that everybody likes them, but this can make them a people pleaser. This can lead to them taking on long hours at work to make their boss happy. It’s also unrealistic because there’s not a person on Earth that’s universally liked. I think this is something they’ll come to realize in their own time.

They may come across as indecisive at times, they aren’t. They always know exactly what they want, but can have a hard time asserting themself. 

There’s a fire that burns bright here, this person has a lot of drive and ambition. This is where that aries energy comes in, they don’t have to have aries placements so please don’t get fixated on that. But, like I said before, they hold themself back by prioritizing other people and neglecting their own needs. They have the potential to be really successful, however they need to start putting themself first. 

This seems like a very sensitive individual, just the thought of doing something under-handed stresses them out. Which is a good thing for other people, because your soulmate’s very charming and could probably talk themself out of anything.

For some reason I get the impression that they have a bit of a sweet tooth.

How You Can Recognize Them:

2 of Swords r, The Empress, Queen of Cups, 3 of Hearts

9 of Pentacles r, Judgment r, The Moon, 10 of Spades

The Fool, Mother of Wands r, Hierophant r, Jack of Diamonds

The Chariot r, The Hermit, 4 of Wands, Joker B&W r

3 of Pentacles, 4 of Wands r, Knight of Wands, 4 of Spades

King of Cups r, The Magician r

You’re having trouble getting in touch with your emotions

September

Think before you speak

Let’s start with the reinforcements of their self-esteem issues, as well as their people pleasing tendencies. It’s exhausting for them, emotionally and physically. They are well and truly holding themself back, and I think that by the time you meet them they’ll be starting to examine these aspects of themself. This will be something they struggle with for a while and there may be a period of time where they withdraw to think things through.  

The joker in black and white in standard decks is my fool reversed card, but it’s reversed so its the fool reversed reversed. The fool upright, I feel like there could have been a simpler way for my cards to get that message to me. But I also feel like it represents the way your person talks to themself, they make everything just a little bit more complicated than it needs to be. They think in circles, eventually getting to the point but it may take them a while. This may be a contributing factor to their perceived indecisiveness. 

 They want to make a home with you. I get the impression that when talking about it with you, they’ll appear to be cool and collected. Like it’s not a big deal to them. But then they’ll turn around and shout it from the rooftops. It won’t be possible for people to not know you’re together, they’ll just be so loud about it. 

Outside of the need to make everybody like them, they’re a pretty care-free individual. It will be important to them that you have fun together. I think this playfulness is their most defining feature and probably the first thing people notice about them.  

In the first two piles, it looked like they’d be friends for a while before getting into a relationship with their person. That’s not the case here, like I said before, when this person knows, they know. They’re not going to waste time with you.  

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Pile 4: Zebra

Who They Are:

The Fool, The Hanged Man,  Queen of Swords, Ace of Clubs

6 of Swords r, 2 of Wands, The Hanged Man, Ace of Hearts

Ace of Cups, Mother of Pentacles r, 4 of Wands, Jack of Spades,

3 of Swords r, The Magician, 10 of Pentacles, Queen of Cups r, Jack of Diamonds

3 of Cups, The High Priestess, Strength, The Fool r, King of Spades

Soulmate 

Hostile

May

The first thing I’m picking up on is that your soulmate is someone who is very carefree. They also have a lot of romantic energy to them, so they are definitely a hopeless romantic.

The amount of Major Arcana here tells me that this person is likely very spiritually gifted, they might not be consciously aware of this.

This person is kind of a go-getter. Once they decide they want something, nothing’s getting in their way.

There are some conflicting energies here because as happy and carefree as they are, there’s an equal amount of pain and hardship. This is someone who’s faced a lot of hostility, so at first will be fairly guarded. They love the idea of being in love, but have difficulties opening themself up to the reality of love. It’s not all bad, they are making an active effort to heal and not let past heartbreak hold them back.

With the Magician and High Priestess facing each other, this is someone who is likely very in touch with their spirituality. Not only are they able to  trust their intuition, but they also have everything that they need to follow it. Once they have a gut feeling about something, whatever it is, they will trust it more than they’ll trust you, and be right 90% of the time.

 They are very compassionate and probably are used to giving more than they take, which gets them taken advantage of. Part of their growth is going to be finding a balance in this aspect of their life. 

This is someone who values family and most likely wants some kind of family unit, whether that be having children or pets. 

The month of May might be important, it could be when you meet or one of you could be a Taurus or a Gemini.

How You Can Recognize Them:

Ace of Cups, 3 of Pentacles r, 8 of Wands, 2 of Swords

Page of Cups, Justice r, 5 of Cups, 7 of Clubs

King of Pentacles, 10 of Cups, Strength r, 2 of Diamonds

2 of Pentacles r, 9 of Cups r, Queen of Wands, King of Diamonds

Death, The Hierophant, Page of Wands, 9 of Spades 

Sensitive

Peaceful

There’s still time to change your mind.

One of their prominent characteristics is their sensitivity. This doesn’t mean that they’re crybabies, they are just very mindful of everybody's feelings. This paired with what we learned about the painful parts of their past probably makes them a little insecure. This insecurity is only a problem when it comes to relationships. They may come across as very confident and flirty, but as soon as it moves past that they start clamming up and getting nervous. It could be bad enough that they have a hard time believing that you actually want to be with them.

They invest a lot of time into their projects, whether work related or personal. It’s likely that they struggle with finding a work-life balance. This is someone who needs to feel productive at every moment of the day. They keep themself busy so that they don’t need to be alone with their thoughts. This isn’t someone that knows peace. It is something they’d like to experience, but they don’t know how to. They have too many thoughts and can’t quiet their mind, their inner-demons get the best of them at times. This isn’t something they express outwardly though, everyone around them probably sees them as someone who, while busy, is fairly laid back. They need a lot of guidance here so if you’re someone who meditates, this could be something you help them with.

It’ll be easiest for you to recognize them based on their sensitivity and active lifestyle. They will be extremely helpful to their friends and family, and would drop everything to be there if needed. They are also, surprisingly down-to-earth. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Pile 5: Hawk

Who They Are:

5 of Cups, Judgment, Queen of Wands, Queen of Spades

Knight of Wands r, 10 of Wands r, 5 of Pentacles r, 3 of Diamonds

7 of Cups r, The Fool r, 10 of Pentacles, King of Spades

2 of Swords r, 9 of Cups, 3 of Cups r, 3 of Spades

The High Priestess r, 3 of Pentacles, Magician r, 9 of Diamonds

“You’re my everything.”

You need to hold yourself to more reasonable standards.

This is someone with a lot of pain, they are overwhelmed and feel defeated. I’m getting the impression that it has to do primarily with work/co-workers. It could be that they put a lot of themself into their work and seem to always get passed up for promotions, or they could have even been recently laid off. They’re very ambitious and intelligent, so if they did get laid off, it would be a big hit to their ego. Alternatively, they could have almost reached a long-standing dream, only for it to fall apart at the last second. 

Your soulmate has a lot of fiery passion that they don’t always know what to do with, so they turn everything into a competition. The thing is, they’re only competing with themself. They’re always trying to be better than they were yesterday, even when it’s unrealistic. 

As passionate as they are, they can be very patient when it comes to getting what they want. They know that not everything can be rushed, even if that’s frustrating to them. They try to avoid making reckless mistakes, but sometimes this can lead to them not making decisions in a timely manner. 

They value family and friends greatly, this could be the most important part of their life to them. They’ll test you to see if you can gain the approval of their loved ones. If you don’t, they may begin to have second thoughts. This is a soulmate though, so you’ll likely be very compatible and win everyone over with relative ease. 

How You Can Recognize Them:

5 of Pentacles, The Moon, 4 of Swords, 5 of Clubs

King of Pentacles, Judgment, 5 of Swords r, King of Wands r, 7 of Diamonds

2 of Swords r, Daughter of Pentacles, 5 of Pentacles r, 3  of Clubs

Temperance r, Son of Wands r, High Priestess r, 7 of Swords r, Jack of Clubs 

6 of Swords r, The Tower r, Page of Pentacles r, 5 of Hearts

You are not seeing clearly

Hesitant

When You meet this person, they will be coming out of a very rough period of their life. They are going to be at the start of their healing journey and they won’t have a lot of time or energy for romance. They’re likely very hard on themself, they don’t want to be seen as weak so they don’t express negative emotions. This is something they have to confront in order to heal.

They are going to be in a complicated headspace, there’s going to be difficulty separating the past from the present, and there’s not a lot of balance between their spiritual and physical lives. They either reject the spiritual to embrace the material world, or neglect their physical well-being and focus solely on their spiritual self. 

You know how some people use their trauma as an excuse to inflict pain on others? This person’s the opposite of that, everything they’ve gone through has made them a patient, compassionate person. This will probably be one of the first things you notice about them, how kind they are. They are also very dependable, they’ve experienced going through hard times alone and don’t want anyone else to feel like they have to. 

Overall, they come across as a very good human being, but there’s an underlying tiredness to them. They might be dealing with a little bit of brain fog, so at times they’re slow to process the world around them.

[blueascend]

Omura Aimi had been working at Toyokawa for roughly four days when she realized that their ace salesman, Kurosawa, had a boyfriend.

To be fair, she had been on the lookout for particular signs. Omura hadn’t been able to be out at her last job and she’d been hoping that Toyokawa would be different. She’d done her best to befriend everyone, keeping her ear out for office gossip, getting the lay of the land.

The first time she saw Kurosawa with his boyfriend, she breathed a sigh of relief. Surely, if the most popular man in the office could be himself so openly, Omura wouldn’t have any issues.

Unfortunately, it soon became apparent to her that most of their coworkers weren’t aware of Kurosawa’s relationship status. Everyone seemed to believe he was single and straight.

How? Didn’t they have functioning eyes?

It became a slight obsession for Omura over the next week, watching Kurosawa blatantly flirt with his boyfriend without anyone noticing. They even had matching red pens they kept waving at each other like the least secret signal in the world!

Then one day, someone caught her staring.

“You have a crush on Kurosawa?” her coworker, Nakamura asked. She laughed, not unkindly. “Better get in line, then.”

“Huh?” Omura furrowed her brow. Kurosawa was now fixing his boyfriend’s tie, standing way too close to him to do so. “No, not really.”

“No?” That was Chino, her voice bright and shocked. “But just look at him.”

Omura looked at her coworkers, a knot forming in her stomach as she saw their confused expressions. Uh oh. She wasn’t ready for that kind of suspicion, not when she had no idea how they would react.

“He’s not my type?” she tried. When they kept staring, she added, “I, uh, like someone else?”

Nakamura and Chino glanced at each other. “Don’t tell me,” Nakamura said. “It wasn’t Kurosawa you were looking at, was it?”

“You like Adachi!” Chino concluded.

Omura swallowed. Adachi. Right, that was the name Kurosawa’s boyfriend wasn’t it?

Well, if it would throw them off her trail. “Yes. Yes, I do.”

Both women giggled.

“He is cute, I guess,” Chino said. “And much more attainable than Kurosawa.”

Nakamura clapped her hands. “We need to get you two together! An office romance, this is so exciting!”

They were gone before Omura could object, whispering between themselves. Omura groaned. That could’ve gone better.

Someone tapped her shoulder and Omura turned around to see Fujisaki. They didn’t know each other that well, as Omura had spent most of her time with the other women in her department, but she’d heard nothing but kind things about her.

“I’m sorry,” she said. “I don’t mean to be nosy but I overheard you. Just so you’re not disappointed, I think Adachi is actually seeing someone.”

‘I think he’s seeing someone’ she said, but the glimmer in her eye very clearly stated ‘I know he is’. Had Omura misread the situation, was she actually Adachi’s girlfriend?

But no, then she would have said as much. She didn’t seem jealous or territorial either, only genuinely concerned that Omura might be in for a disappointment. How much did she know?

Deciding to test the water, Omura carefully admitted, “To be honest, I didn’t even know his name. It’s just easier to say you like someone when people are asking. I’m new here, I wanted to fit in.”

“Ah.” Fujisaki’s gaze turned curious. She looked at Omura for a few moments and Omura wasn’t sure what conclusion she reached, but she finally offered a kind smile. “I see. In that case, I’m glad I don’t have to worry.”

Omura smiled back. Maybe it was too soon to tell but she felt like she had an ally in Fujisaki. 

*

“Omura, you are going to love this!”

Omura looked up from her laptop, seeing Nakamura and Chino approach her. “What?”

“We’ve just arranged for a group of us to go for drinks after work,” Nakamura said. “And we got Adachi to join! This will be the perfect chance for you two to spend time together.”

Omura’s stomach sank. “You - you did?” 

“Don’t be nervous,” Chino said, misreading her expression. She reached over the desk, putting her hand on Omura’s shoulder. “We’ll be right there with you if you need help.”

Nakamura nodded, shooting Omura a finger gun. “You got this.”

“I got this,” Omura echoed faintly.

There were eight of them at the bar later that night; Omura, Chino and Nakamura, as well as Fujisaki, Adachi, Kurosawa, and two male coworkers Omura hadn’t learned the names of yet. 

Chino and Nakamura, in full matchmaker-mode, managed to arrange the seating so that Omura and Adachi sat together at one end of the table, with Kurosawa and the rest of the women on the other. 

Omura glanced at poor Adachi, who looked supremely uncomfortable to be there. Even if he didn’t know about Omura’s supposed crush on him, he didn’t seem like the type to enjoy these kinds of gatherings. Omura was sure he’d much rather be at home, unwinding with his boyfriend after work.

Sorry Adachi, she told him in her mind. She frowned, considering. But at least now I can try to find out if I’m really right about your relationship with Kurosawa.

“Have I introduced myself to you yet?” she asked him.

Even that polite question was enough to startle him. “What? Ah, I don’t think so.”

She gave him what she hoped was an encouraging smile and nodded. “I’m Omura Aimi, I started working at Toyokawa recently.”

“Adachi Kiyoshi.” Adachi nodded back. “Do you - do you enjoy your work?”

“Very much.” Omura looked over at her friends, who both gave her not-so-subtle thumbs up. “It’s a nice atmosphere, much more friendly than my old workplace.”

“I see.”

An awkward silence descended between them. Omura had a sip of beer as she wondered what to say next. She had no idea how to casually broach a topic like hey, are you gay like me? Adachi mirrored her, grimacing slightly as he drank.

This really wasn’t his scene, huh?

“What do you like to do outside of work?” Omura finally asked. 

“I, ah,” Adachi fumbled as he placed his glass down, spilling a few drops of beer. “The usual things, I suppose. I like reading, drawing, playing on the Switch.”

“Yeah? I like video games too, I just started a new save file in Stardew Valley.”

Adachi perked up. “I’ve also been playing that. I got Kurosawa to join me in multiplayer but it’s been going kind of slow. He can’t master the fishing mini game and it’s been frustrating him. He’s not used to being bad at stuff.”

Omura giggled. “I can picture that. I love the multiplayer too, especially since I can use it to get married to-” my girlfriend, she barely stopped herself from saying. She cleared her throat, smiling awkwardly. “Anyway, it’s a lot of fun.”

“Mhm,” Adachi agreed.

Another awkward silence commenced. Omura looked to her friends again but they were busy talking amongst themselves. Fujisaki met her eyes and smiled. Next to her sat Kurosawa and he was glancing between Omura and Adachi, frowning unhappily.

Maybe Omura was reading too much into it but he looked almost... jealous?

She turned back to Adachi, the desire to confirm her suspicions growing stronger than ever. Screw subtlety, what she needed was privacy.

“Adachi?” she asked. “Do you mind if we talk alone?”

Adachi stiffened, eyes widening in panic. “Eh?”

Omura stood up. “It will only take a moment.”

Reluctantly, Adachi got up as well and followed her. As they walked away, Omura could hear her friends talking, the alcohol likely making them a little too carefree and loud:

“-so bold! But I guess with a guy like Adachi, the woman has to take charge.”

“Do you think she’s going to confess already?”

Their voices faded away as they turned a corner. Omura lead Adachi to the balcony connected to the bar. It was thankfully empty and as Omura slid the doors shut behind them, they had perfect privacy.

“What did you want to talk about?” Adachi asked, clearly dreading the answer.

Omura bit her lip. How to word this? “You... we...” she rubbed her hands together, finally settling on, “I think we might have some things in common. Besides video games.”

“Like- like what?”

Omura opened her mouth to answer but before she could, the doors to the balcony were shoved open. Kurosawa stood in the doorway, looking as much a mess as Omura had ever seen - that is, still very put together, but hair slightly ruffled and cheeks pink from either the alcohol or the warmth inside the bar.

“Don’t!” he cried and this was it, as blatant a sign as Omura was ever going to get.

“Relax, Kurosawa,” she said. “I’m not going to confess to your boyfriend.”

Kurosawa blinked. “You’re not? But they just said-” he stopped himself short, clearly realizing what he’d just admitted. “I mean-”

“He’s not my type,” Omura cut in before he could panic too much. “Besides, I doubt my girlfriend would approve.”

Both Kurosawa and Adachi stared at her. For a second, Omura feared she’d really misunderstood them after all, but then Kurosawa slumped against the door in relief.

“I see,” he laughed.

Adachi looked relieved as well. “So that’s what you meant by ‘things in common’, huh?”

“Yeah,” Omura said. “But sorry if I made you nervous.”

“It’s fine.” Adachi waved his hand in dismissal. “How did you find out, anyway? Did Fujisaki tell you?”

So Fujisaki really was in the know. “No, and I don’t think she ever would. You two are just really obvious to those who know what to look for. Especially Kurosawa.”

Kurosawa shrugged, not looking the least bit ashamed. Adachi rolled his eyes fondly.

“Anyway, I’m gonna go back inside,” Omura said. “I’ll tell them I chickened out on confessing to you or something. They’ll lose interest in this whole thing soon enough.”

She passed Kurosawa, who stepped out onto the balcony as she went inside. As she closed the door behind her, she could hear Adachi teasing Kurosawa lightly:

“Were you being jealous again, Yuichi?”

“Don’t be mean. How could I help it when Kiyoshi is so cute, I want him all to myself!”

Adachi laughed but it was muffled. “Not here, someone could see!”

Omura shook her head as the doors sealed shut, leaving them to their privacy. 

She couldn’t wait to tell her girlfriend about this.

[midnightlee25]

Yandere ABC: Wakatoshi Ushijima

A Affection: How do they show their love and affection? How intense would it get?

Early on it will be little things (he had to get advice from his team) flowers, candy, somewhat romantic love letters but as times goes he will get the hang of “romance”.  Being more physical (kisses, cuddles things like this) he can be very soft with you.   

B Blood: How messy are they willing to get when it comes to their darling?

If he is enraged enough then they will be nothing but a stain. it will still get messy but at least they will still have a chance of living….at least sometimes.

C Cruelty : How would they treat their darling 

He is only cruel if he knows you've been bad (being cold towards you, leaving you in the dark ect.) other than that he will just be very strict.

D Delusional : How aware are they?

Not very, he believes that if he can make you sure he can be a good partner then you'll love him. He just sees all the other ‘bad parts’  are just him showing you the best way to be. He wants the best for you is all. 

E Exposed: How much of their heart do they bare to their darling? How vulnerable are they when it comes to their darling?

Slowly, it's not if he doesn't trust you (as long as you behave)he just doesn't think everything should be shown all at once. 

F Fight : How would they feel if their darling fought back?

It's not like you could ever win against him anyways so he just finds it a bit tiring and annoyting at times.

H Hell :What would be their darling’s worst experience?

When he snaps it happens very rarely but it's a nightmare when it happens. He’ll place his hand around your neck (not tight, it's just a warning after all) and pushes you against the wall as you lock eyes. Yours whole of fear trying to figure out what he will do next while he's just...blank..no emotion whatsoever. Then for what feels like hours he puts his hand down, walks out of the room and locks the door leaving you in the dark. 

I Ideals : What is their plan for the future?

Him being one of the best aces around with you by his side with a little one of course.( he doesn't want too many just one or two at the most if you want more than you’ll have to have  a deep talk with him.)

 J Jealousy : How jealous are they when it comes to their darling?

Surprisingly it's a mix of jealousy and protecting, it's more wanting to protect you than anything else. 

K Knowledgeable : How much would they try to learn about their darling?

The ‘normal’ things like, dislikes ,schedules.  Basically if he sees it as useful he will learn it but if not then he wouldn't.  

L Love letters: How would they go about courting or approaching their darling?

I believe he would do things every old fashioned way, offering to walk you when it's dark( or to the dorm), leaving flowers or candy at your desk or locker, letting you use his coat when it's cold ect. (if he sees you are feeling the same then he will hand you the flowers or candies in person)

M Mask: Are their true colors drastically different from the way they act around everyone else?

No he would basically be the same except he will show more emotions when you're alone. (he would also be more controlling and overbearing) 

N Naughty: How would they punish their darling?

Isolation and intimidation. For the most part his intimidation is what keeps you in line but if you step out of line then he will do things that will scare you back. ( like what he did in darling’s worst experience, anticipation it's what he uses.)

O Oppression: How many rights would they take away from their darling?

His not taking away your rights pre say its just trying to show you the right and wrong things.

P Patience: How patient are they with their darling?

He will be fairly patient. He does understand that not everything can be done in a short time some things just take time.

Q Quit: If their darling dies, leaves, or successfully escapes, would they ever be able to move on?

He would be numb, he would just….stop feeling.. Anything, everything would just be dark and unfeeling.

R Regret : Would they feel guilty? Would they let go?

No, he doesn't really see anything wrong with what he's doing. 

S Stigma: What brought about this side of them (childhood, curiosity, etc)?

It's just how he is plus with how his parents' relationship ended he wouldn't want that for himself (who would?) so he would do whatever he can to make sure that doesn't happen. 

T Tears : How do they feel about their darling crying, screaming, and/or throwing a tantrum

Same as tendo if you're going to act like a child then you'll be treated like one. But if you really are sad then he will hold you close.  

U Unique : Does anything make them different from the classic yandere?

The poker face he keeps (metaphorically and not) he keeps calm in a high stress situation so if the police ever came to talk to him he could do as if you were not in the basement at that moment. 

V Vice: What weakness can their darling exploit in order to escape?

Truth be told…. Nothing. You would basically have to either knock him out (which is near impossible) or lock him in a room and hope you can find the keys in time. 

W Wit’s end: Would they ever hurt their darling?

He may break you down metanlly but not physically although he may make it seem like he would. 

X Xoanon : How much would they worship their darling?

Not as god/goddess as most of the other yanderes would but  he treats you differently than most people.

Y Yearn: How long do they pine after their darling before they snap?

He would wait a few months( mostly to make sure the feelings would stay) before starting to leave little gifts and such. 

Z Zeal : How passionate would they be? Would they be passionate enough to break their darling?

He would try to be passionate and romantic although with how he is it may come off a bit...plain. So passion wouldn't be the thing that breaks you.