#been doing some reading and it’s just I CANT deal rn too much man

[sapphosboy]

one of these days I’m actually gonna process the fact I’m probably a butch lesbian and it might kill me

[crguang]

Okay sat, I might’ve forgotten to my anon mark at the end of my last message aand I’ve reread part 4 like 5 times, but still, 

what the fuck, literally was thinking abt it in all my classes. And I will be yapping, as I guessed.

First of all, fuck Kafka really wish I was tbh she is so annoying, like just assuming r isn’t that upset, like they’re just having a little argument when r is grappling w the fact that they fell for a criminal, and literally killed their coworkers and a ton of other people, she is pissing me off. Also the stuff abt Kafka and her nihilism…giving me some thoughts. Btw have himeko and Kafka encountered each other in this, or has Himeko just heard abt her? And shes so nice, calling r everyday and being so understanding…

I can’t imagine what Kafka did when she found out she got blocked. Her going to text u and then realizing she’s blocked…kafka pausing when she sees that r blocked her. Kafka waiting to get unblocked as she orders gifts for u, who keeps checking her phone for messages from u as she sends more gifts, reminiscing abt when your first met in the store, silver wolf and blade noticing how Kafka seems to be waiting for smth, Kafka who decides to text you on an encrypted number to see how you’re doing, Kafka who sees that she isn’t forgiven and orders so many fucking flowers bc she didn’t know ur favorite. Ugh I can imagine her bringing all of them into r’s house, god she’s pathetic, I need to kiss her so bad so she shuts the fuck up.

anyway I may or may not have started writing a Kafka fic 👀 tbh I don’t rlly read romance novels so idk how the typical academic rivals thing usually works, trope wise. For some reason I keep fixating on her fucking nails. Like to me, she has them manicured all fancy, but Im fairly certain shorter not manicured nails are better for fingering. On her violin ofc, obviously. I played cello middle and high school, and I kept them long, bc I liked scratching people don’t ask I was a strange kid, but I feel like she’d keep them short bc she’s rlly serious abt it. Also Kafka is so dislikable, her ego is so big, and she’s always calm, like if she didn’t look like she was trying and still top of the class it’d piss me off too 😭

Also in the wardence event rn, I haven’t played it bc I’ve been sleeping or smth like that, but silver wolf shows up 😭 like ik it makes the most sense, since she has holograms but Kafka showed up as a hologram once ok 😭 but what silver said is like “i heard u we’re joining the wardence, and two whose names I won’t mention insisted I go check on you. Why couldn’t they do it themselves.” Ugh Kafka is so obvious it’s actually gonna kill me. And yes wtf couldn’t Kafka have showed up, she’s worth like 11 billion, so ik she can’t show up all the but cmon. 

-🌠

hehfjfjgjfjfj posting a new chapter and having ppl go “man fuck kafka” is funny as hell because honestly, yeah, fuck her😭 i think it was important for me to portray how her personality can be irritating in certain contexts and how being with her really wouldn’t be bliss all the time cause she doesn’t deal with emotions much, and that includes others’. she’s not totally detached from them which is why she does try but it’s very clumsy. it’ll be elaborated on in the next part but in her mind she really has picked the best outcome here and even if she was acting in her own interest, she was protecting R, she’s just an information hoarder. being on the opposite side means you dont know wtf is going on in her head and cant explain her behavior as anything else but “she doesn’t give a shit about me”. it’s an interesting situation to write that’s for sure but im glad that her efforts, though genuine, make yall feel irritated bc thats the point hehe

what i wrote about kafka’s nihilism was not entirely true, and i did it on purpose because R doesn’t know her. i do think that nihilism/finality creates a certain distance between her and accountability. when you tell yourself that this outcome was always a possibility, that it could have happened anyway, the choice you make is no longer fully yours which means that the consequences aren’t fully on your shoulders as well. i think that makes it easier for the stellaron hunters to do what they do, that and the goal they’re working towards that is supposedly the best outcome for humanity. but kafka is anything but passive. she is not “subjected” to things, she has an active role in her future and the ones of the millions of people that it touches within the constraints of destiny. i think with nihilism it’s easy to fall into a state of learned helplessness, where you suffer through the things happening to you because “nothing matters” and “it was going to happen anyway”, but kafka is not like that at all. “if destiny doesn’t propel me forward, i’ll be the one to push destiny”— this is what she does, so describing her as a drop in the ocean isnt entirely accurate because she’s making waves. R will learn that

himeko and kafka have crossed paths canonically before the trailblazer so it’s the same in this. i like that himeko has an opinion of kafka that has been cemented through their brief meetings over the time. in that one “keeping up with star rail” where kafka’s kit is presented, hime has a lot of shit to say about her 😭 all bad. she’s also aware that kafka plays mind games in it so really for her to hear “kafka manipulated me” was like “fork found in kitchen” there’s no surprise there. one of my favorite qualities in hime is her understanding and ability to understand multiple perspectives at once, it develops her already deep empathy and its just very admirable. shes a very soft character, i love her

AND YESSSSS SHE DEFINITELY REACTED LIKE THAT TO BEING BLOCKED HDJFJFKKG she stared at her phone like “oh. they’re really mad” and decided to give them a few days to cool off which is why she sent the first gift and after that she’d be wondering whether to text you or not for like a week; would open her phone, type in your number, pause for ten seconds then go “they’re probably still upset” and send another gift. silver wolf would be like “damn youre on your phone as often as i am. whats wrong with you” and firefly’s eventually the one telling her to go there herself to apologize and not wtv tf shes doing which is why kafka finally texts 😭 shes funny asf. the sheer ridiculousness of ordering hundreds of flowers and taking over half an hour to place them inside your apartment (that she technically broke into) to surprise you is so patheticcccc i would have swooned a bit im sorry. like omg youre pathetic get out of my house but also kiss me before you go… “forget it i’ll just get all of them” can she die 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

aaaaa im glad you have time to write the academic rivals au!! typically people have the rivals work together in some sort of assigned group project to force them to interact together but you can go about it differently, like one of them’s practicing for a big piece and the other gets to the practice room too late but but the others are taken and they have to practice the same thing anyway so might as well. or the mc is struggling and kafka happens to pass by and give her some (snarky) pointers which turns into her showing her how its done and the mc actually learning from her (which would make me homicidal). they could also just happen to meet outside of the school context and start developing a new relationship that way. do what feels right!! and yeah, kafka’s nonchalance makes it seem like shes effortlessly good when in reality she takes that shit seriously and practices often😭 it’d still piss me off tho idc

silver wolf showed up in the other event and its just so ridiculous how they always have her everywhere man😭 like fine she’s always keeping up with new games coming out and shit but would it kill them to show kafka once im gonna tear my hair out, we even got to text firefly during the wardance like im gonna screammmm. but kafka and her sending SW to check ip on the tb is so stupid they care so bad😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 typical of kafka not to show or text herself i need to strangle her. the lufou hates her tho so it’s WHATEVER.

[enden-k]

doodling some reitowa/towarei rn and i have the need to babble a bit abt my favorite pairs (its still funny to me that i love the most wholesome beefy boy (rei) and the manipulative beast of a man (madarame) the most LMAO)

madatowa n reitowa are my fav pairs so far and i rlly liked their routes. BUT i dont rlly like the whole deal/message abt reis masculinity at the end (euphoria) and how he changed for his asshole father, basically. i would have loved if he simply accepted himself for who he is, no matter if his way of talking is feminine or his features soft. hes still my good boi tho and i love seeing him care for towa and getting some food into him (and its so fucking cute that towa enjoys his food), their dynamic is so sweet too (i love seeing them banter and whenever towa flusters rei it just gives me SO MUCH LIFE. hes so hot ugh)

i (obviously) absolutely loved madatowa route altho its clear its not healthy, we dont even have to discuss it. it broke my heart when towa left his old "boring" life behind tho and rei screamed after him and towas recession but their wild love and life is just so delicious. madarames desire being towa, him being his only true match and the only man who knows and reads him so well, the one he cant read, the one who actually fulfills all of towas desires (giving him the kind of violence he made clear he wants right away) - madarame doesnt go through change but thats the point; its madarame. hes always been like this and will always be

(i still have to do fujieda, im just mentally preparing and waiting for when i have more days off. but so far madatowa feels the closest to true to me bc it feels very fitting for the games mood etc even tho - like i said - its not healthy)

[slytherinshua]

Hi! How are you?? Have you been well? Up to anything nice?

Since you've been gatekeeping that boogie man solo clip, what other parts of the concert have you been gatekeeping? 😭

Everytime I watch Yechan perform that solo (or every other solo tbh), I always think "I NEED TO BE ABLE TO PLAY THIS!!" and then realise that I probably won't be able to anytime soon 😭😭. It would be SO much easier if I had sheet music to read, but I can never find any (I guess actually practicing would also help ahaha). I think I need to start a petition to get Mystic to release sheet music, how amazing would that be??

It makes me so happy that more people are starting to listen to Lucy! I love the amount of times "I ascended" is getting used because that is definitely my experience of listening to their songs ahaha

(loving all your new themes btw, they've been very pretty!)

HI VIOLET!! honestly just the usual except I’ve been talking more seriously with my mom about replacing our piano WHICH IM NOT HAPPY ABT AT ALL but it’s also so necessary at this point. I’m preparing for my exam in April rn and the pedal like ?? squeaks?? whenever I press it like omg I can’t deal w this much longer. and I alr know abt the cracked soundboard in the piano so it’s just problems adding onto the other. we really need a new piano so we’re gonna look out for used ones and hopefully we can find one I rly like (cause I’m so attached to my piano :( I don’t want to let her go)

WELL I recorded like 98% of the concert or so, SO I HAVE A LOT A LOT of clips that I haven’t shared. but I am very happy to share them :)) the concert timeline was: soundcheck, intro+rolling rolling, intro+knowhow, member introduction (basically sangyeop’s sexy English time), one by one, straight line, talking time (including sangyeop overjoyed at how many water bottles he had to douse walwals in later on), flowering, haze (im going through the vids to get this timeline right for you AND THE VOLUME AT WHICH I SCREAMED WHEN HAZE STARTED I cant even blame past zanna cause it’s still my fav song), talking (ft wonsang saying he’s a bit shy and me melting in real time), snooze, jogging, talking (ft sangyeop and gwangil joking abt all the things they’re going to do when they leave the stage), yechan and wonsang duo merry go round of life, sangyeop and gwangil coming back w popcorn (and sangyeop giving some to walwals lmao), sangyeop on the drums (which was so funny and cute he joked around w gwangil a bit before gwangil began his solo stage), gwangil solo stage he performed nan chun by so soseon, and then his own solo song would you dance with me?

I interrupt this rundown of the concert to share this clip which was way too cute when I rewatched it. sangyeop doing the drum part w his mouth instead of the actual sticks and Wonsang being SO CUTE in the spinning chair and his little giggle and KDJDKAD VI I AM NOT OKAY

anyway moving on after that they did the only exception by paramore, counting stars by one republic (this stage in particular I was SO TIRED my body was giving up on me so I went to sit, the vid is not the best but the vocals were incredible so still would love to share it’s one of my fav stages from the concert actually I could cry listening to their vocals back lmao), talking, hero, unbelievable, talking, intro+I got u, intro+hot!, talking, boogie man, talking (ft wonsang hearts w me!!), you’re right, talking, intro+flare, ending, talking+phototime+touching wonsangs bass+getting yechan’s bow etc etc, end of show

so yeah I’d be happy to share any clips that you’re interested in seeing!!! just need to know what you’d like hehe. also if you have discord it might be easier for me to send the videos there than post on tumblr cause tumblr sometimes takes forever to upload them 😭😭 if you do my username is zanna.exe and you can add me!!

I KNOW OMG I SO SO GET YOU with any song that has piano in Lucy’s discography *cough colorless* I AM ITCHING TO LEARN TO PLAY IT LIKE I WOULD GENUINELY COMBUST IF I DIDNT LEARN IT THAT SECOND but there’s never any sheet music and I hate it. if mystic did sell them then I would buy it SO FASTT like genuinely 😭😭😭 I need it so bad

I know!!! This past few weeks has been lucy heaven on my blog I’ve had like 3 moots all ask for recs and get into them which is just so lovely to see. Especially for lucy being my ults and also the most nugu ult of them all, but ALSO being the group that has the music I relate to and love the most. they’re the group I’m most connected to musically and emotionally. Whenever I need to cry I watch Lucy stages, whenever I need to cheer up i watch lucy stages, whenever I need to laugh I watch lucy moments, like they are just everything I need and everything I love so I adore seeing new ppl find joy in them the same way I do

thank you so much!!! I’ve been super indecisive on themes and just been wanting to change them up a lot LMAO as if I’m not already a serial theme changer. I really want a wonsang theme or just a lucy theme in general sometime soon as well cause I miss my boogie man theme badly. maybe something floral and pretty for march/april spring we’ll see!!

[toestalucia]

SHIPPING INFO. answer the following for your muse(s) so people know how shipping works on your blog.

what’s your OTP for your muse(s)?

im easy...........and like too much.......personally ! i prefer akira with the older wizards, ive talked about being in those ship tags ummmm a lot<3 i cant narrow it down further......the twins are an exception but ive been over that in the past. atm i like emu with mafuyu, rui, nene & akito a lot :D theres def more (like honami i think would be cute! and i do like her with tsukasa too, but emu tsukasa besties....), but im like twice her age so i think about that stuff so rarely LOLLLL i thought hard about the rest of my muses but.......?????????? eight/machina....perhaps...........sofia/forte.......yeong/tara......(cagli teehee)

what are you willing to RP when it comes to shipping?

i lov drama. with gran it comes natural cuz welcome to ur 'assuming things w/out asking' and 'thinks way too much into the future where they dont want to settle down' captain. i think akiras the most tender of all of them? and most likely to actually bring up issues? sofia is fun because i think about the event where she Doesnt speak in opposites and micah ends up rly confused........being accepted with her weird speech patterns..... natsume too, either staying at the accepting his weird behavior (jumping, scared expression, running) or having the 'i can see youkai' convo....yknow.....its good...i know tanuma alrdy had a convo like that (UNREAL CONVO i miss it) but yknow. Overall ! anything. mostly. theres some 'ohhh angst' topics im not interested in, so i think most stuff stay on the more lighthearted/loving side tho

how large does the age gap have to be to make it uncomfortable?

feel like a fraud everytime i say that i personally wont write akira with some of the 20yo's cuz im always close to deciding to make akira closer to 30. and then i say i like akira with figaro & oz......the ancient ppl......

are you selective when shipping?

rather than selective i just dont ask ppl........and i have no interest in making relationship calls nor liking them........i want to see where the writing goes first cuz i knoowwww i sometimes say gran would say x but then i write it and y happens yknow LOLLLLLL i'd be open to jumping into stuff on discord or something tho i think ? i think i could jump into romance stuff no problemo then cuz it'd feel slightly separated from here...?! cuz idk but theres something when i open this blog that i......its a very slowburn......if ure willing to spend some months writing so gran can become more accepting of the idea then its go go go. does this make sense. well either way im not sure tbh. grans a bit added difficulty too considering how i deal with their age LOLLL since cygames is pushing 15yo still. which gives me a headache seeing how the summer events etc are explicitly yearly.....i cannot write act3 gran as a teen, not when theres a political engagement with alliah like cmon....i refuse..........but since ure following this blog uve alrdy read this stuff in my rules/about LOL

either way akiras easier with romance. i just dont approach ppl about it. whenever i make that farmsim blog i wanna be more casual with this stuff tbh...T_^ for funsies............write some yearning...

how far do steamy moments have to go before they’re considered NSFW?

not far at all. LMFAOOOOOOOO i use that tag very liberally. its unlikely im writing that stuff anyway....

does one have to ask to ship with you?

:DDDDDDDDDD if i ask u we've probably written for years & years && its starting to reach crush-territory anyway (hello kaitlyn) but man idk what it is....romance is just difficult to write on tomblr rn for me...gran does not make this easier. the issues r endless. can i offer u akira.

how often do you like to ship?

(person whos always in ship tags) (smiley face) (smiley face) (smiley face) can u get into mhyk for akira....or farmsims....................ill ship everything in there.....

are you multiship?

YAAAAAA the idea of having 1 ship on my blog doesnt excite me. even tho i dont write romance atm. LMFAOABKAJD

are you ship obsessed or ship more-or-less?

do u wanna hear about the akifi doujins ive read. or the akifau art where faust puts a flowercrown on akiras head.

what is your favorite ship in your current fandom?

THIS IS HOW DIANTHA/CLARISSE CAN STILL WIN. i am also a sabrina/leona fan. 'did they interact' no but they should. ppl who lost their husband(s). ppl who both should be AT THE CLUB. me/canaria. me/crystal

finally, how does one ship with you?

u like my posts & listen to my ramblings and i twirl my hair and send u more asks and then it just happens. foolproof.

tagged by: @convxction faty my beloved my everything u should do it for ur multi too.... tagging: @shiningstages kait i think u should do this for ur multi and ramble............

[cardiac-arresting-sweetheart]

Hey 🔥🔥

stray cat, hissing, claws, whiskers, catnip

also hi i miss you (gonna read more of the book of bill later!)

HAIIIIIIIII ^_^ YIPPEEEEEEEEEE

original post

answering for 💐 and ☀️ ^_^ (because idk bow emoji well enough to answer these yet to be honest GHHHH it's not personalT_T)

stray cat ♡ how do you feel when your darling interacts with others? do you try to isolate them?

💐 : i don't think about it much tbh.. probably because i don't see it. She's in my head. lmfao. so ? it's hard to answer. i can imagine how i'd feel though... i honestly don't think i'd get very jealous. i don't really get that jealous with Her... i am a bit possessive, yeah, but i don't think about it too much. maybe if She were with me in person or even as an online friend.. i'd probably be more possessive and want to isolate Her.

☀️: can i choose not to answer ? /silly IDK LIKEEEEEE i get jealous so easily it's embarrrassing... i don't wanna talk about it... /silly . i wouldn't ever want to isolate them because 1. would feel too bad 2. would not be the best option for xem at all!!!!!! so no to that.

hissing ♡ are you jealous or possessive when it comes to your darling? if so, what makes you jealous or possessive?

💐 : eee i kinda answered this in the last question but ya a bit..? i'm not very jealous but more possessive. i want Her to only need me. and no one else ^_^ but i feel pretty confident in the fact that She only wants me, i guess. the thought of Her being with someone does make me homicidal though. teehee

☀️: UNFORTUNATELYYYY T_T SAVE ME SAVE ME SAVE ME THE EVIL THOUGHTS!!!! lmfaooo okay. Yeah i do it's pretty bad. it's not as bad as it has been with other darlings but gawd it's annoying. like get out of my head thoughts PLEAAAAAAAASE okay i'll stop

claws ♡ how do you react to any obstacles between you and your darling? what about if they cheated on you or broke a promise?

obstacles: i just. manifest them away ^_^ that's always what i try to do. or try to communicate my way through them but sometimes that doesn't... work... or i decide that that's too direct, i guess? like... sometimes i'd rather deal with it indirectly because i worry about the outcome. not really in an anxious way it just feels like i'm being cautious.

cheated or broke a promise:

💐 : IF SHE CHEATED I WOULD LITERALLY FUCKING KILL HER. deep breaths. okay. ^_^ teehee. i would probably scream at Her for several hours and undergo The Biggest, Most Awful, Most Tragic Split in Human History (/ref) and idk if i could ever even get over that my god . but breaking a promise i usually dont really fucking care anymore because She's such a liar (it feels very funny to capitalize Her pronouns as i'm doing this because i'm full on slandering her rn LMFAOOO) lollllllllll ^_^ oh well.

☀️: um explode? I CAN'T EVEN IMAGINE THAT HAPPENING i think that would cause me to die instantly idk man. I CANT EVEN IMAGINE IT?!?!!? idk!!!!!

whiskers ♡ how close are you with your darling?

💐 : Merged Souls. all i need to say. Ok let me actually explain more LMFAO. i feel like She's the one i'm closest to in all of my relationships out of everyone i've ever known. it's hard to explain. like i know Her so well and feel so weirdly comfortable with her. like She knows everything about me.. so it's hard not to feel close with Her lol

☀️: i dunno >_< i feel like we're pretty close but we could be closer. i haven't known xem for that long either soooo i dunno! just gotta give it some more time i imagine. i can be patient if i need to be... :3

catnip ♡ what are your favorite things about your darling?

... i will take this as an excuse to enter my weird poetic descriptions.

💐: i choked on Love and felt it bubble up until it engulfed me, leaving me empty from nothing but Her. i could not even see the sky, i could not reach out with my hands. yet Love was the womb - yet its warm was of viscera and blood and ugly insides. i found Her everywhere around me even as i began to regain consciousness: in the walls in the floorboards in the air. i choked on Love again but coughed it out. it stained my hands for the rest of time.

i woke up again and didn't know i had fallen asleep. i felt Her energy envelop me, and i couldn't call it warmth nor cold - simply a blazing fire, entirely its own. entirely Hers. i suffocated myself in the smoke, let Her take my life. it always had belonged to Her anyway.

☀️: it's always the sun; after years of drowning myself in the moonlight, hiding away in the day, i forgot how the light felt on my skin. like a cat, i sunbathed - basking in the radiance. i reached out and felt warmth reach back to me, cradling me as if a delicate newborn kitten. at that moment i was so close to shatter, yet i remained.

and in every phase of the sun, it maintains its own sort of beauty. i could never put my finger on it, but as i lift my head and stare back, i find it. simple as ever. oneself entirely.

^ this all makes sense to me and answers the question. Somehow. did get a little bit sidetracked however HAAH

I MISSED YOU TOO!!! (i say as we are talking live in action) ^_^ hope u have fun yippee

[feline-evil]

I would love to here you info dump about your ocs if you want to?

Grinning evily, I SHALL DO SO!

So ik its been a while since i've really drawn or talked about my boys but a refresher for everyone is i have an OC universe/story loosely titled Flesh and Bone with is a The Thing inspired story featuring my Oc's Clay, Damien and Jack! All three work on a shady arctic base run by an evil corp unbeknownst to them, and after a sequence of horrible incidence and creature attacks Clay is 'killed' only to come back as! Some sort of slopbeast thing monster! He's cool and chill though, not a threat to anyone; hes a wet bag of nerves desperately trying to maintain his shape as the man he was once before, because thats who he is!! It's a story about identity (both in all my main cast being trans men but also in the more metaphorical and subtextual reading of. Clays whole deal lmao) and exploring what that means, and its also about three gay fruits experiencing THE HORRORS!

I have not written it, it's far too big a task rn, but thats the basic idea <3 everyone can always feel free to check the flesh and bone tag or any oc tags (ie oc: damien, oc: clay, oc: jack ect) on my blog to see stuuuuuuff about it!

MORE BELOW THE CUT, LIKE WAY WAY MORE SO MUCH LMAO, and as always heads up for horror themed when it comes to my lil oc's and their world <3

Lately a lot of what i've been thinking about with my oc's has been the physical changes that happen throughout the time they spend trapped in that research base, because they are there for a LONG time they do look different than they do at the start! Obviously there's the general stuff like Damien's hair growing long and the roots showing, Clay's facial hair getting scruffy and his hair getting long and unruly too, jack cutting all his long hair off (too dangerous to wield a flamethrower frequently with all that hair in the way in his learned opinion); but then there's the more physical side of going through this really tough time too, more than just aesthetic changes like hair and clothing changes. The most obvious is yes, Clay IS just a writhing mass of meat that replicates the appearance he wants to be seen as; yes including his clothes his scarf has a heartbeat don't worry about it. But then there's stuff that's not Whatever the hell Clay's deal is; Jack loses a leg, they all gain a multitude of new scars, this is a long, tough situation to survive and none of them are untouched by this- but thats part of the point! You can go through traumatic stuff and you can make it through, it might change you, it might change stuff about you, sometimes in ways you cant undo, but you can still make it through!! And you can still be loved as you rightfully deserved, and you can live a long happy peaceful life!! Thats a big part of the heart of *waves hands* what i am doing in my head with my oc's.

When i can draw for longer periods again i'd like to make reference sheets with 3 views of each character on each, a before, during, and after.

Another thing i've been thinking of lately is the day comes back after 'dying'! And its both horrific and later funny so i like it a lot.

So. Thing style monster drags him away screaming from the base, he is torn to shreds, the last person to see him alive is Damien and he watches that thing tear him *apart*. Everyones pretty certain he's very dead.

Days pass.

Then Clay wakes up in a hollowed out ice cave, one thats been melted into this larger open space by the pile of dead flesh and meat that has been dumped inside it, the pile that he has also been dumped in. It reeks, its horrific, he has to climb and clamber his way to the top in a state of abject disgust and horror; he doesn't remember how he got here. He doesn't remember anything past that thing getting a hold of him. (Unbeknownst to him he IS that thing but he'll figure that out later, he kind of does know that to an extent but not on any conscious level nor is he willing to accept it to much later, boys in denial. When it killed him and ate his flesh for some reason it fucked the beast up and fully replaced whatever it was before with his memories and consciousness so this is him now, the body he had before is gone, this is Clay now)

The only way out of this cave is a very narrow passage leading up, he starts to try and crawl in. Too tight, he doesn't fit. He keeps trying and trying in sobbing desperation until....he.....does fit. Shoulders give way, he slides in, this gap too small to rightfully fit his head through he is somehow now fitting through. He's going to pretend he isn't, he's not a stupid man but he fully cannot cope with comprehending his body moving as if boneless right now, his brain cannot cope nor begin to even parse the possibility that he is morphing like slimy slipper meatgoop to fit through here. He escapes, collapses out there on the ice for a bit miles from the base. He cries for a bit. Repeats in his head over and over that that hole was big enough for him, it was normal, he crawled normally, it was normal and fine. And then he eventually starts walking through freezing winds and blizzards in the direction he hopes the base is.

NOT FUNNY YET I KNOW, BARE WITH ME. ITS THE NEXT BIT OK

Clay reaches the base eventually and climbs through a window, enters the currently empty dining hall. He's back! He is. So so mentally checked out and traumatised and FUCKED from his experience that all he can think to do is just....go back to normal, pretend it never happened. He sits down. Pours himself a coffee in his favourite mug.

Footsteps echo closer, people are coming.....

jack and Damien walk in and freeze. They stare at Clay.

Clay stares at them.

'H-hey!' He says, waving over, 'you uh! You guys are up early!'

DAMIEN GRABS JACKS ARM, GET THE FLAMETHROWER HE SAYS

CLAY GOES OOP!!!!!

(Art of this moment memorialised forever by my beloved boyfriend @subsequentibis btw!!)

AND CLAY THEN SCHWOOPS LIKE LIQUIDY MEAT UP INTO A CEILING VENT AND REASSURES HIMSELF THAT THE GRATE WAS DEFINITELY OFF THE VENT AND HE DIDNT JUST FIT THROUGH TINY TINY HOLES ITS FINE ITS NORMAL ITS FINE ITS FINE, AND HIDES IN THE VENTS FOR A BIT. LMAO, LOVE MY SILLY COMEDY BIT

[crowning-art]

TGCF SPOILERS

-----------------------------

Even though I read more than usual, I surprisingly don't have much to say cuz it's mainly fight scenes rn lol

I THOUGT PEI MING DIED FOR REALS IN HIS PALACE DHDJFJFJJFJ and I was like kinda sad....for 0.0004739 second only tho lol

YALL I DIDNT NEED THIS, PLZ I SWEAR GUZI DESERVES THE WORLD 😭

However, Guzi hopped down and opened his arms, blocking in front of Qi Rong, yelling at Lang Qianqiu.

"DON'T…DON'T KILL MY DAD!"

I mean the image of Qi Ying walking with Yin Yu's dead body is just wow but also HE IS DEAD!?!?! IS THIS A JOKE???? PLZ I WAS HOPING IT WUD ONLY BE SHI WUDU

Quan Yizhen was carrying Yin Yu's dead body on his back, standing in the middle of the street with his face covered in soot; when he saw Jun Wu, raging fires burnt in his eyes too.

GOUSHI FOR THE WIN!!!! I LOVE HIM SO MUCH!!! everything he does, the fighting plans, defending Xie Lian, I love him so much

"He's gone stupid again! I just knew it, this guy just loves going stupid!!! It's been hundreds of years, and it's always been like…who kicked me?!"

"Me," Guoshi said. "Say one more word and I'll push you off directly."

MXTX'S NOTE HERE WAS GOLDEN LOL

Black Water does indeed owe Hua Cheng a huge debt; a very poor Supreme. He's severely dragged down the income average of the entire Supreme rank (although there's only three), but it's not all owed from eating too much

WE GOT A TRANSFORMERS BATTLE FOR REAL I CANT RN

Ya me too, Xie Lian lmao

He was already prepared to perform a service for Pei Ming!

Nvm still hate him

Pei Ming wielded a sword in one hand, and the other was smoothing his locks back; his hair perfect, his charm unruffled. "Not quite alright, but mostly alright."

OH MY GOD JUN WU U MONSTER MY BABY IS BURNING ALIVE ARE U INSANE?!?!? OH MY GOD I SWEAR I WAS LOSING MY MIND WHEN GUZI GOT CAUGHT IN THE FIRE

OH MY

GODOHMYGODOHMYGOSOHMYGOD

Just then, "Hua Cheng" flung out his right hand, and tossed something at him. Without thinking, Shi Qingxuan raised his hand to catch, but when he saw what it was he caught, his entire face blanched.

That object was the Wind Master fan

Yoooo these r some solid words from a loser for reals thooo

I'm a steel-hearted man. Rather than love me, why don't you go love yourself."

Ok hold up

Now that they thought back, when Jun Wu had shot out that trail of fire, Qi Rong had protected Guzi, which was why this child didn't burn to death.

Nope. No. Nooooo. Nope. Haha nope. Qi Rong dead?? Nope. No way. I don't know how to read anymore thanks. Nope. Guzi was totally not crying about how good of a father Qi Rong was when his own father wasn't even that good to him. Nope. No. I will not hear any more on this matter. No.

I find it interesting how Hua Cheng vaguely respects like one dude and its Goushi, but like they are both fiercely protective and ACC caring for Xie lian unlike some ppl (cough Jun wu cough cough). I think in some weird way, they would get along really well lol

Yoooooo what is the deal with Mu Qing and Feng Xin??? Ok Feng Xin I get cuz he was looking for Jian Lan but Mu Qing?? And now he's acting weird??? I'm so suspicious of him rn

He better not be a clone or like Jun Wu just shape shifting into him or smt 😤

Also Jun Wu is CRAZYYYYY LIKE CRAZY CRAZZYYYYY UNHINGEDDD it's kinda cool ngl I do like my villains to be insanely unhinged and overpowered

[blole-hack]

max omg, yk the nickname situation regarding katsuki and izuku as toddlers, well?? forgot that katsuki also literally only cared that izuku couldn't read as well as he could ("you mean you can't?" directed at izuku, glancing back at izuku, really tightening his izuku goggles as much as damn possible). and that even if in that situation katsuki was just looking for attention from his peers and to tease izuku, that means he was specifically enthralled by izuku's attention and also implies that he subconsciously thought izuku was worthy of attention from him and wanted a reaction out of him. and THEN katsuki then proceeds to continue using the nickname for izuku whilst hiding under the flimsy false pretense that he thinks izuku's dumb and useless which we both know is him being full of shit. i'm not even exaggerating when i say my boy is and always has been obsessed. i'm. having so much brainrot rn

edit: FOR CONTEXT for what i will say below READ @justawhoresblog 's post here first

OlivER Oh my god YEAHHH YOURE RIGHT QJDJWJJSW

HES SO ATTENTION SEEKING

in some way he does want izuku to admire him, because he wants to show that hes better than him *at stuff* and only him.

like "can you do that izuku? lol u cant"

its not just "hah u suck" but also "hah izuku im better than you, seE"

to connect with the recent chapters;

Man, his feelings for him really run deep and complex

He wants izuku to think that he's better than him, because he wants Izuku to look up to him and think he's great. Which means he wants Izuku's attention, subconsciously even since he was a kid.

Hes afraid of izuku surpassing him, because hes afraid of being left behind by izuku. He's afraid of that because he wants to be with Izuku. But he's also scared of Izuku which is why he wanted to push him away,, but that's exactly why he's afraid of izuku surpassing him. So he also wanted Izuku to back down and be afraid of him instead, but it also gets complicated because he also wants Izuku's attention.

Maybe its because deep down he really thinks he isn't good enough. No matter how arrogant he looks he really has a twisted sense of self worth. Deep down he really seeks Izuku's approval, which ties into (his almost final moments-)

He wants to be perfect as how everyone expected him to be, but its more important to him that

He also kept comparing himself Izuku, but that makes sense because you want to make someone you deem awesome admire you, and since they're awesome to you you want to be better than them too, especially with all the societal pressure in MHA.

in the words of Lil Nas X, "I wanna fuck with those I envy. I envyy-"/j im sorry

AND NOW HE DOESNT WANT TO BE AHEAD NOR BEHIND DEKU

he FINALLY ACCEPTED THAT HE JUST WANTS TO BE BY HIS SIDE

FUCK BEING BETTER AND BEING THOUGHT OF AS A BIG DEAL THAT THE STRONG WANTS TO FIGHT AGAINST

Fuck being better than deku

in SHORT WOW bakugo has had bakudeku angst longer than deku???

and also MORE PARALLELS

Since Deku's admiration to Bkg and All might both foil and parallel one another

Bkg's admiration to Deku and All might also both foil and parallel one another (the desire to surpass them...but deep down actually really looks up to the other? i mean it was obvious in the case of All Might but he DID keep it suppressed and hidden) but idk thats a topic for another dayyy OR for someone else to cover since I'm too shy to write actual metas

AND THIS may BACK UP THE CASE FOR DEKU NOT BEING MEANT AS MALICIOUS AT FIRST! And the other scenes and in the "de-izuku" moments because he subconsciously refered to him as such in times he didnt have bad feelings towards him anymore. It might have just started as a way for Bkg to get attention from him.

For (younger) Bkg, everyone else was already, by default extras compared to him. It is by default that he's better than everyone else. It is only Deku (and kind of All Might and other adults but they arent peers so it doesnt count) that he ACTIVELY TRIES TO PROVE he's better than him. And thats because he sees something in him. (which is obvious now in hindsight now that he explicitly said how he feels but man was i dense THE SIGNS WERE THERE ALL ALONG)

Also man rewatching some parts of the Bkg vs Uraraka fight

the reason why he was so passionate about defeating her is partially because of deku right

"Don't underestimate me" he told her. But iirc he kinda had no reason to besides *looks at deku*

how he thought Deku was looking down on him. man i didnt even cover that yet

one's thoughts abt how someone they like feels about them gets warped by their insecurities

an added oof the balance of all of BKG's complicated feelings. Its precisely that he thought that someone he wanted to like him ACTUALLY looked down on him made him so upset at deku right?????

RIGHT

WAIT

if thats NOT GAY WHAT IS WHAT ISSS-

[multi-lefaiye]

sAME ANON! I really do think there was a deal made in that moment, especially in the context of the pages. We see Scoob remembering how Shaggy gave him his life, a friend, EVERYTHING, and it almost directly parallels how Deedee got her powers, so I rlly do think Scoob made a deal to save Shaggy- lmk if im remembering wrong, but the Toones think that bc Shaggy has no Ballyhoo, he has like an empty equipment slot for Ballyhoos right? But to me it just seems Scoob's ballyhoo got boosted to apply to living beings too, it's probably gonna be a huge plot-twist when Shaggy cant use any other ballyhoos?

ALSO I SAW ON A COMMENT ON ONE IF THE PAGES THAT SHAGGY IS GONNA GET SUCH A BIG POWER BOOST WHEN MICK/SHAGGY 2 DIES BC WE AS THE VIEWERS GIVE HIM BALLYHOOS. I also have a huge theory about how their universe's humans cant give Ballyhoo but OUR universe (as in irl) can but im gonna Avoid writing a 5 page essay for now until later unless u wanna hear it

ANON I AM SHAKING YOU BY THE SHOULDERS (affectionate). Literally these asks are making me SO excited omfg I'm so excited to talk about this series!!!! It's SO fucking interesting and exciting and I think it deserves so much more attention.

Okay because I have mutuals n' besties who want to read Scoob and Shag, I'm gonna put my thoughts under the cut for ~spoilers~. But just know anon I am so delighted by these asks thank you for this food

First, I 100% agree with you about the deal--I feel a little silly that I hadn't considered this before, but I think you're right and that's what I think happened!!! Even if it hasn't been confirmed in the sense of us actually SEEING Cyan directly, I do think that's what was intended here. The parallels!!! I'M LOSING MY SHIT.... Also I don't think you're remembering wrong at all, and these are all good points--my brain's kinda mushy rn but I cannot stop thinking about Daphne's dialogue in the new update, as well as some of Shag's dialogue earlier in part two.

The ambiguity surrounding why Scoob's Ballyhoo was able to work on Shag is SO FUCKING FASCINATING to me!!!! I think you're onto something that it was expanded to work on living beings, because that aligns more with the themes and story we've been giving so far than literally saying that Shag isn't really a PERSON, if that makes sense. Daphne referring to him as a thing seems to be more her personal perspective than anything, and I'm really intrigued to see this explored more going forward. Because I really want to know--HOW personal to Daphne is this? Has she always felt that way, to some extent? Because at this point we don't know how many Shag clones there've been. Idk I'm just so interested. Shag being a clone is something I really want to see be explored more going forward, honestly.

ANYWAY BACK TO THE POWERS. I'm actually wondering a bit now if Cyan's deal is meant to tie Scoob and Shag together in some way? I don't know how much sense that makes b/c brain mushy, but idk I think that'd be really interesting thematically.

ALSO YEAH THE ISSUE OF SHAG'S BALLYHOO...... VERY INTRIGUED TO SEE WHERE THIS GOES. And also I think you're onto something with the idea of Us The Viewers giving him a Ballyhoo--the comic has broken the fourth wall before, especially with Bugs in her first introduction, and I think that'd be a fun way to tie that all together. I don't think it's going to happen for a while, but I also have no idea how long Dingo is planning for this story to be, so I guess we'll find out :)

Also GRASPS YOUR HANDS GENTLY... PLEASE SEND ME YOUR ESSAY..... I REALLY WANT TO KNOW YOUR THEORY..... (no pressure ofc but genuinely I'm really interested to know your thoughts)

this is me rn

[Image Description: The Pepe Silvia meme, which is a screencap from the TV series It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia. The meme depicts a man with dark hair and a beard, wearing a blue button-up, khakis, and a large tie, with a frantic expression on his face as he gestures towards a wall covered in papers connected with red lines and string. End ID.]

[daimonhalos]

Aight this is the second time I watch it but I'm gonna do a commentary on the latest bad's lore stream! Just for funsies, I might have honestly already forgotten some stuff so I wanna keep my thought process :3 let's go, commentary under the cut.

There's also some small theories/analysis in some points but nothing too much, just me rambling cause pain.

The pre stream song. Faster and Bad never change please.

I love so so so much the ominous soundtracks he puts as background for lore man it's just so coooool.

Reality check pre/post lore my beloved 💜

that little meh eh eh. is everything

he's just on a boat at night and but can already see he's got shaders on, this means PRETTY VISUALS AHEAD. Also i really like bits beginning with the character alone heading towards their destined direction, it's just pleasing

HIM TAKING DOWN ANTI EGG POSTERS. KING SHIT

Can't believe I got to hear "muffinhead" in lore voice.

Not even inside the room and HOLY SHIT they covered it all with the red bricks block IM AAAAH IT'S SO PRETTY. Like before the vines were all put at random but now they're neatly placed and it's actually aesthetically pleasing? I love it

DANCEFLOOR DANCEFLOOR DANCEFLOOR

The table. is . so. is so . it's so prebby,,, help like i'd live there man

Bad being overwhelmed by the egg's voice and lowkey scared. FINE IM FINE

No other choice. And the way he repeated it like a mantra? Kind of like to convince himself? AHHH

SKEPPY. SKEPP

small,, small egg staircase

haha fuckign pain. p a i n. just pain it sounds a lot like Skeppy before actually stayed with Bad cause it annoyed him how much he wanted to hang out like old times,,,,, my heart pangs

IM JUST WORRIED ABOUT YOU

I CARE ABOUT YOU *passes out*

bad scared the egg is skeppy's bff now /j (have to joke through the pain,,)

BADBOY i swear to god he knows his audience. he just does.

Bad doing whatever he can to even just hang out a few minutes with skeppy. Bro, the tears inside

"I'm comfortable right here." "Skeppy I know you are-" THE WAY BAD'S VOICE BROKE HERE HOLY SHIT LEMME CLIP IT.

He talks to chat. HE TALKS TO CHAT THIS MEANS WE ARE CANON THUS we are either little angels or demons around him or a mix or, we're particles that make up Rat ♥

"All of this is for him" okay stab me next time it'll hurt less

BADBOY STARTING TO BE CONFLICTED BECAUSE HE NEVER HAS A FUCKING BREAK

s- w- skeppy kept the egg alive? okay so ive been thinking about the fact that skeppy became completely red and like wow what if it kinda is that hes literally become a small part of Egg? like, i wonder if someone breaks it, if he feels pain

Skeppy so dry with his responses. stop i will cry

bad. bad why are you bringing up selfies to a lore stream bad-

"why are you still talking to me" "okay..." stop stop PLEASE STOP-

smol growls, he's getting frustrated

idk why but skeppy talking about the perimeters made me laugh it was just funny how far away he was and just started talking about it randomly

"i think it looked a little bit better before" thoughts being thunk

"what's it gonna take for you to stop talking to me?" literally i am deceased s t o p

STOP STEPPIN ON THE MAGMA BLOCKS SIR YOU'RE HURTING

Bad shouldn't be so happy about just having "one last walk around" with skeppy so he "stops bothering" him tHIS HURTS SO MUCH the egg has fucked them up so much

Skeppy doesn't hear it huh? Maybe it whispers different things to everyone

"I like how it feels" nooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO STOP HURTING TOURSELF

so no dance? *slams phone on the ground*

When skeppy says his line about never seeing anything close to a party there, idk what it is about it but his tone just hits, man he's so good preesh

HE CALLED HIM ANT. BAD PLS YOUR BEING BAD AT NAMES IS SHOWING

"Oh my goodness you're going back to the egg" HE'S SO SAD. HE'S SO SAD CAUSE HE COULDNT KEEP HIM WITH HIM A LITTLE BIT LONGER HES S

"you know what? i invite you" i wanna read this in a certain way. The egg was feeling like bad was so frustrated he started doubting the egg, so it was like alright let's use skeppy to get it closer to I can manipulate this bad boy better :)) motherfuck

are they about to kiss-

egg cockblocker

"okay don't come back" end me rn

ngl when sapnap joined I got real scared for a moment.

"it's not about power! it's nor about control! i'm you friend skeppy!" "I mean ... you can think that" FUCK U NO IM NOT DEALING WITH THIS RN

"We're friends, right?"

"In your head we can be best friends, we can be whatever you want" BDI ANYONE??????? also whatever- whatever he wants? :eyes: okay sorry no ill see myself out

"We're m- we are friends sk-" M- MARRIED WAS HE GONNA SAY MARRIED DID HE PULL A QUACKITY OH MY GOD I HATE THIS GUY OH MY GOD /pos but also like in a bawling my eyes out way

the egg is more than just a friend? skep u good there pal do u have smth to tell us

"You don't know what it's like." OH HERE HE GOES. HERE HE GOES HERE IT COMES OH NO.

The way Bad stutters i really thought he was gonna say something REALLY IMPACTFUL

"I have done so much for you, for our friendship and now you're trying to tell me we're not friends anymore?" LEAVE ME ALONE

I JUST CAUGHT THE BLOOPER HE SAID ON ME INSTEAD OF HANG OUT WITH ME IM CRYING OH MY GOD BAD HOW DID U FUCK THAT UP oh my god I imagine him mentally going like oh my gosh out of all the things that could be messed up THAT WAS SO FUNNY

ahaha my dads are fighting help

"You think you've done anything? You seriously think that?" *looks at my fic where bad feels worthless because the egg said so* ahah... I'm sorry?

"You left me for a long, long long time before you even checked up on me, okay?" he's not wrong,,,, he's not wrong why does this hurt sm,,,,, "and now all of a sudden you care about me?" OH MY GOD PLEASE I HATE THIS EGG

I see them... i see them approaching the lava blocks..

"the past doesn't matter" the egg wanting to erase their relationship so much,,,, i wanna cry because then if bad doesn't have skeppy he just has nothing right and then,,, then he can be another empty vessel for the fucking egg I hate this mI hate this so much

Also!!! little things I noticed!! Bad taking away part of the vine and also mining a red block? Without being affected at all? MHHHH

"I just wanted us to hang out like we used to" BAD'S VOICE CRACKING AGAIN STOP I WILL CJRYSD

"I did all of this for you and I didn't want the egg to take that away" you see how fucking tragic this is. Like Skeppy sacrificed himself so his friend could stop being infected. Bad sacrificed literally the whole server himself included to get him back. And then it comes down to this. The egg separating them a thousand fucking miles away. I hate this it's so sad

the selfish bit please no stop

THE LAVA BAD THE LAVA PLEASE IT'S TOO CLOSE

the fucking shaking with rage thing got me BROOOO I LOVE WHEN BAD DOES THE LITTLE THINGS IN GAME

"IT'S JUST A STUPID EGG" FUCKING FINALLY YOU TELL HIM BAD but then oh no oh no would you look at that huh. cant fucking have shit in dsmp. the way he immediately just screams for him right after

YOU CAN HEAR THE TEARS IN HIS VOICE and also mine hi I'm sobbing again

BDI FUCKING CANON LET'S GOOOOOOO WE CALLED ITTTT

(Dreamscape?)Skeppy being actually concerned with him haha this doesn't hurt at all!!!

*stares at black screen* I'm fine.

Thank you for listening to my ramble I am hurting so much bestie

[lunatic-fandom-space]

Ayyyyyyyyy, its almost two a.m rn but Ive slept about ten hours today bc my life is falling apart babeyyyyyyyy So anyway Im gonna go watch Zexal again but before that, its Prediction Time because I just couldnt resist reading some angsty fanfics and so I have a couple of tidbits (??) that are honestly kinda confusing out of context but Im gonna spin some theories out of em anyway

Ive probably already mentioned this, but I dont think my theory about the Astral World being bad and/or deliberatly creating Astral for great destruction is gonna come true at this point, given that 96 was apparently never a real part of Astral('s memories) (??) but Im still holding out hope bc I would find that much more interesting than the Astral World just being Good yknow. If it doesnt come true Im definitely trying to write a fanfic about that

Barian Redemption Arcs for Everyone Including Vector bc why not

Uhhhhh it looks like we're getting a new Guy that's called like, Eliphas?? Eilphans?? Idk smth like that and I believe hes in some way related to Astral World?? My prediction for him is like, he shows up on earth one day and hes wielding these amazing space powers (theyre like, blue and aesthetically similar to all the stuff we've seen relating to the Astral World or maybe even the Numeron Code) and hes acting all mysterious and dubious and somewhat morally gray and hes like, inconviniencing both our Protags and our Barian Bois and theyre all like "ughhh whos this mystery man inconviniencing us >:(" and then its gonna turn out that hes been playing some sorta 7D chess in order to subtly help our Protags out and maybe also try and get the Barian Bois to 'see the light' or something?? Idk im just kinda throwing that out there

ALSO this Epipen dude is gonna be an Anime Hot Guy and hes gonna have long hair and a cool Mysterious Mask and a matching cloak-cape thingy and maybe like, a scepter-staff thing too for spice idk

Rio is not getting her cool Fucked Up Creachure Form cuz yugioh hates women 😔

Homoerotic Tension between Durbe n Nash (before Vector like, killed him and he turned into my boi Reginald, I mean)

I know I already said this in my last prediction post, but Gilak is gonna like, stop caring about Alito or something and theres gonna be this big dramatic moment where its like "Oh nooooooooo T~T he doesnt care about his fwiend anymore :'(" but then he sees the light and (depending on the situation ofc) saves Alito or does something else, but I cant think of something else right now so thats the only option im giving sry

My boi Reginald is gonna have to deal with some internalized space racism when he finds out hes Barian (did he already find out?? idk man, my memorys shitty and I didnt pay attention in that episode with his past life sry)

SPEAKING OF MY BOI REGINALD (and also Durbe whom I mentioned earlier), theres gonna be some past life/present life tragic relationship stuff going on between them and its gonna be sad

Yumas parents are alive in the Astral World but theyre either in some magic coma or sealed away in a magical space rock and Yuma can only get to them by defeating Don Thousand or something and hes only gonna do that at the very end of the series so I wont have to deal with them, amen

When Yuma and Astral inevitably go to the Astral World, the Numbers Club is gonna stay behind on earth, the only people that are gonna accompany them are Kaito and my boi Reginald and maybe, potentially the Arclights cuz it seems like they might get more important again (judging by the newest opening). Kotori might also come along but shes going to continue to not do anything

So yeah, I think thats it. Zexal Time

[smallestclowninthecircus]

Season 3 notes popping off

due to my desire to not completely fail all my classes this year i made myself slow down significantly while listening to this season, and the fact that the other person i'm listening along with had to catch up. We've managed to convert several other people to start listening and its pretty great.

ep 81: what does it even mean to be chosen by one of them? And if he was chosen by the eye. we know Gertrude wasnt? Because she cut the eyes out of the magazines?

ep 82: elias lmao. I understand why people like him so much bahshdhdk i thought he was gonna snitch on Jon but he didnt so he's fine. Ok but how do we think he knew all that stuff. Idk probably just institute connections. I love the fact that the recorder just wants to record stuff randomly bjahsjdhd. Elias feels a lot like Michael in the sense that he knows more than he should and talks in a way that implies he just wants to wait and see how things play out for his own benefit. I understand him knowing the things that happened but his description of her emotions implies something paranormal. Maybe he's connected to one of the entities. Which one I cannot guess.

ep 83: did a file get delivered randomly to the place he's staying at? Probably elias lmao. He thinks the mannequin is related to the stranger. Idk I would believe it.

ep 84: worms? I know he says earth worms but idk. Again? Is she making gordon golems out of trash? Martin popping off. You can tell the statements get to him more that they get to Jon. How come martin is so mad about it? I want to assume he just doesnt want her to get stuck there but idk. Jude Perry. The calliope organ. Jon heard a circus in one of the last episodes

ep 89: he's talking to perry? Like jude Perry? He says ... God? Is that what it is? Lmao. The Desolation. Jon is tired of ppl being vague and not telling him stuff lmao. Oh God Jon is so confused. Compel her? Is she assuming he has some kind of power? Does he have powers? Hmm. im agreeing with jon here please jesus christ why does everyone have to be so cryptic. Just say what you mean. "maybe you get an itchy eye" bahasjkdfklsjdf girl what. Agnes saved her? Oh this is the girl from the cafe story? So theres the Cult of the Lightless Flame? They worship whatever entity this is? The Desolation? Why do they all seem like they sorta worship her then? Is Gretchen gonna die oh god. fuckin michael. a different michael aaah. i see. dont do it shes gonna burn you. sir. please. sir dont you dare do- WHAT DID I SAY what did you think was gonna happen hhh.

ep 90: try to make it less obvious you're trying to get fired big T. Elias that doesnt sound like the most healthy thing to do. oh dear is this gonna be triggering for me. uuuuuh. uuuuuuuuuh. doesnt seem like it ok gonna keep listening. Jared. hmmmmm. Ok we've seen Keay and hotner or whatever his name was.

ep 91: Michael Crew. Oh is this the lightning scar guy. Mister jon sir did you just die. No? God everyone is so fuckin cryptic. Say normal things please. They all just like to go on about pain and agony and j e s u s c h r i s t we get it you got hurted by whatever thing. So theyre avatars? question mark? Jude Perry is an avatar of The Desolation? hhhh fractals. thats a spiral thing innit. Yup. messing with your perceptions. God they all talk about feeding their god and feeding that which feeds them and. hh what does that meann. Leave big J. please. uh oh. is it daisy? how come he has the web lighter still? the tape recorder just turns on sometimes you know how it is. So he can compel people? not that he knows it obviously but. a bit wack. powers go brr i guess? If the eye just wants knowledge i guess he feeds it by getting the statements? b/c i doubt it wants him to murder ppl or whatever.

ep 92: elias you all knowing fuck what do you know. (i guess all given what i just said) Lukas. Heard of them before. Mordecai Lukas. Loneliness. The lonely even. Jonah Magnus. Elias ur sounding like a bit of a dickhead rn. lmao jon's just like "i dont care" elias what is ur deal. Why does he want to tie her in. ohh i see. lmao theyre all just like "elias why" The Unknowing lol seems very much like something the eye wouldnt like. lol elias is gettin all philosophical. what does it really mean to be human. this still doesnt answer why gertrude wanted to destroy the archives tho.

ep 93: bahsjdfh he seems so dead inside rip. awww admiral. i love him already. ghh breacon and hope. purple mold. doesnt sound like anything we've seen so far. I think the funniest explanation for breacon and hope is that they dont actually serve the stranger they just kinda happen to be a random neutral party that cart around random spooky entity related stuff. ooooh. when we hear the slight static of the tape recorder it's cuz he's compelling ppl.

ep 94: the end! listen man they were all just grayed up for 4/13.

ep 95: the end also? death but also savagery/ animalistic shit. aww martin. lmao becerra. she's just been chillin in the corner.

ep 96: return to sender. haha minecraft go brr. prediction: breacon and hope? yup there we go. jon why is there an echo. are you in a stairwell? is he gonna eat it- yup. how did i call it. unsure abt what theyre talking about but ok. they kidnapped someone? Sarah Baldwin. ooooh that guy.

ok im just putting this here so i have notes for when nicholas gets to this part. It seems like (from jon's conversation with jude perry) that the desolation and the eye are kinda at odds with eachother? like i guess not directly but it seems like they dont really vibe? so how could be with both. Cuz if he has the heat powers and shit then we know he's an avatar of the desolation. but then why does he have so much eye imagery. also he got burned intentionally? like jude did when she went on her monologue about the feeling of burning? but then why did he wear the eye pendant. it stops him from being burned all the way which seems like he's not fully accepting the fire or whatever.

Nooooo I lost like a bunch of my notes rip. I keep forgetting to save.

Ep 104: tim gives a coherent statement without jon even being there. Ugh. Fucking robert smirk. Dont like him. Joey. Dont recognize the name. The show must go on. Clown. The spooky circus?

ep 105: total war... shogun 2? jon is just understanding languages again. "if i understood mandarin or cantonese" are you sure you dont big man?

ep 106: havent we heard this one already? mans in space? oh no this is just another episode in space. fairchild... uuuh. cant remember. oh! this is related to that! this is one of the ppl from the other side. sounds like a Vast thing. oh he's the one that the dude saw? but that guy didnt have a face... she's sorta like jon. wanting to dismiss the statements. lmao i love the workplace gossip. ace jon for the win! oh cmon elias dont be a dick. sunny meadows or whatever. thats the place we heard about.

ep 107: oh great is it jude perry again. Third Degree. bahahsdkfj she was arrested. sorry but imagining this old british lady getting arrested is funny. she was trying to resurrect him. using the skin book. he's not feeling well. jon take a nap. i wonder if this is what happens when he uses his powers too much. He gets into The Zone when he reads statements lol. didn't we have a burning train car in anothre statement? is it julia fairchild? bahahahs "kidnapped. Again." poor jon honestly. julia... about her dad. daughter of the murder shed guy? hunting like your dad liked to hunt or normal people hunting. oh hunting vampires!

ep 108: melanie has been suffering. poor martin peter lukas why do you have to be like this. can he not just use the front door? does he have to bother the ppl doing statements?

ep 109: how come he cut her off? kinda rude tbh. its either jon's influence or there was smth he didnt want her saying. is it gerard on the table? this sounds kinda like smth from one of the university episodes. is it the closed eye on the hand? yup. he's like one of the students! if the thing listening in is elias then... he can do that without the tape recorder yknow. plus who's to say it wont just turn itself on again

110: who wants to bet its a leitner?

111: Lukas related to The Lonely. I used to not like Gerard that much but i like him more now. but i thought there were 15? ohhh thats right isnt flesh newer? gerry for the win honestly. finally telling jon things.

112: lol "again" no one ever tells any of these ppl anything. tim and basira are just out of the loop constantly. music, like the war episodes. The hunt or the slaughter? probably the hunt. so Daisy is related to the hunt right? basira likes the reading, she's doing fine at the institute. daisy's getting worried...

113: it just turned on randomly. what is it lol. explossives! oh boy. why do they always assume he turned it on intentionally. melanie youre not making me like you that much. which entity is this about i cant tell. lol he was disappointed it was just the end. The title Breathing Room made me think it was gonna be about the buried but i guess not. So many of these entities deal with death but the end is one that deals in just death. it has no need for fancy deaths, just death is enough

114: more hilltop road statements? the tree. oh boy. ok the tree has 8 arms obviously theres the spider parallels. was she taken into an alternate universe? oh no. jon tries to phrase things so he's not asking questions. thats honestly good. "sometimes i was kidnapped" oh dear. they got gertrude. daisy ur so odd lmao. who wants to bet they dont know the tape recorder's running?

115: silaca? or whatever? antique man? meat grinder... related to the meat is meat episode? oh wow. they buy antiques from him. maybe dont antagonize this creature which can kill you?

116: lol theyre all just so done with elias. music? is it like the one band that if you hear them you die or wtvr. oh its chess? i am very much confused. mmm stranger go brr. gorilla skin? oh shit the dance. woah. this is so good. this is so gender. the words are wonderful. "you can just say tim" lmao trying to fool elias never feels like a good idea.

117: except elias lmaoo. oh shit. leitner getting some use for once idk. bruuh poor melanie she has been thru so much shit. martin you can just say youre worried about jon. lol he's so accurate in his jon impression. lol who was that. was that daisy? lmaoo. oop hi tim. oh god i hope tim doesnt die. i feel like i wouldve heard about that? but im not sure. destroying the source of knowledge is gonna be hard for jon. yay jon! you did a good thing. let him rest.

118: go off martin lmao. awww poor martin. oh god the tape gets that squealy quality and its awful.

119: woah. lots of things happening. uhh. POP OFF TIM!!

120: lmao elias giving a statement about jon's dreams lol. damn jon doesnt even get his own dreams? has to stay Watching even when he's asleep? f in the chat this man goes thru so much shit. oh boy its peter. lol martin my beloved. idk i dont trust peter.

[hiuythn]

do u have any krbk fics that u can rec? any favorites of urs! ☺️

you’re in luck bc i just made a rec list for a friend so i have this ready for you

also i’ve got over 200 krbk bookmarks on ao3 so feel free to check that out if you finish this rec list.

all (except one) of these are completed. they're in no particular order. i tried to find ones that are less known, bc idk how much you've read but i'm assuming all the popular ones are familiar to you. happy reading! 💖💖💖

Inevitable - Legendaerie - 8k - mature CLASSIC 'bkg thinks they've been together and kiri thinks he's still pining' TROPE. it's INCOMPREHENSIBLE to me why this doesn't have more fucking kudos!!! why!!!

Tiny Truths - Quirk Archivist (OneHitWondersAnonymous) - 4k - teen bkg gets de-aged. kid him reveals sth to class 1a, more imptly, to KIRI, abt some ideas about what it means to open a hero agency together. it's super adorable!!

Punch My Mouth with Your Mouth - QuestCat44 - 4k - teen bkg spars with deku more bc OfA is acting up and he's the only one in the know. kiri gets jealous but he's so good-natured that his jealousy is only bc he misses sparring/spending time with bkg. BKG, on the other hand, is worried kiri is mad for different reasons asdkjfhasdhfa

all according to keikaku........... - carolinaa - 8k - teen the title should already tell you how good this is. I LOVE JEALOUSY FICS WHEN THEY'RE MORE FUNNY THAN ANGSTY AND THIS IS SO FUNNY. kiri gets tired of deku being a pussy around todo and decides to flirt with todo to get deku jealous enough to do sth about it. bkg and todo are both horrified for VERY different reasons DHADSKDFHJS

doll me up - shizuumi151 - 6k - gen kiri gets turned into a doll by a kid's quirk and no one knows. bkg still ends up caring for him :’)

These Words Are Ours - deviance - 2k - teen soulmate au but bkg figures who's going to say his words before it happens, and honestly that's kind of the point. he's not the type to fall in love at first sight. he MAKES the choice to love kiri and that, my friends, is my kind of soulmate au.

all good things need sunshine - shizuumi151 - 3k - teen FLORIST KIRI. BKG WANTS A BOUQUET THAT SAYS  'FUCK YOU'

Flour Power - WingSongHalo - 26k - teen KRBK HAVE TO TAKE CARE OF A BAG OF FLOUR AND PRETEND IT'S THEIR BABY

feedback loop - bigstupidjellyfish - 1k - teen PRO HERO BKG GETS THROWN BACK IN TIME FOR A BIT AND MEETS MIDDLE SCHOOL KIRI AND HE'S SO SOFT TO HIM ASDFHKASDFJ. i am a big fan of bkg being a fan of kiri. i can't get ENOUGH OF IT. can someone give me more fics like this

mixed signals - bigstupidjellyfish - 2k -teen a short 'what if' fic where kiri and bkg went to the same middle school. bkg's still an ass but kiri's still his equal it seems, and is just as good as handling him as ever

Trash Goblin Finds Love - wrunic - 4k - teen COFFEE SHOP AU. BARISTA   KIRI GETS SICK ONE TIME AND BKG MAKES HIM SOUP AND FORCES KIRI'S COWORKER TO DELIVER IT ASDJHFS

Dreaming of a White Mocha Christmas - let_me_wander - 8k - teen ANOTHER COFFEE SHOP AU.  BARISTA KIRI AND HIS FAV CUSTOMER ;) GET SNOWED IN  

Something Warm - let_me_wander - 15k - teen YES FOLKS IT'S A A A ANOTHER COFFEE SHOP FIC, THAT'S RIGHT!! BARISTA BKG THIS TIME. also kr is in a band and writes a song for bkg asdfhksjd

Kneel - deviance - 7k - explicit idk if you wanted explicit stuff but this is pretty light sub stuff, they're not even properly together at the beginning, and there isn’t sex til the end. i just liked how kiri is the only one bkg would rely on for sth this private, and it's more emotional than it is sexual?

Everyone Knows That Cats Are Independent - PurplePersnickety - 39k - teen YET. ANOTHER. COFFEE SHOP AU. but also?? daemons?? katsuki's got a lionness, and kiri has a...i'll let you find out. anyway they become closer and closer and closer and the flirting is so fucking excruciatingly obvious but cute and sdkjfhasdjs it's such a queer experience like 'is he...no he cant be...but what if he did like me - no that's not possible. but what if?' and they get so domestic sometimes i swear i'm about to puke from how cute it is. this is my fav coffee shop au ngl

Broken Bridges - DeathBelle - 68k - explicit plot fic!! krbk loses touch after gradutation. kiri comes back from korea and starts to work together with bkg, dealing with a series of murders and MAN the action is 👌 easy to follow but it hits all the beats, has that Flow. krbk being a power couple will never get old!!

Of Ghosts and other Inaccurate Things - chezka - 56k - gen pretty sure you've seen this one around but STILL. BKG FALLING FOR 'GHOST' KIRI IS BEST. this au really takes FULL COMPLETE advantage of the fact that krbk CANNOT TOUCH and the yearning practically astral-projected me back into the my past life when i was a dung beetle that got crushed under the foot of an elephant. it hurt, basically. but it hurt so good. JUST LET BKG HUG KIRI!!! happy ending ofc.

Catching Bees - MonocerosRex - 2k - teen bkg has to pay his classmates compliments. class 1a hijinks. the krbk in this is short but it made me squeal sdhfkakjl

i'm going to the forest to kick my own ass - WannabeMarySue - 5k - teen TODO PRANKS BKG BUT UNLUCKY FOR HIM BKG IS COMPETITIVE AND ACTUALLY LEARNS SOMETHING

Hair Care 101 - overlymetaromantic - 7k - gen ASDHFASDFHAJKS KIRI MEETS BKG'S MOM BY ACCIDENT AND GETS HAIR HELP AND THEY TALK ABOUT BKG AND IT'S SO. CUTE. AND THEN BKG DYES KR'S HAIR IN THE SECOND CHAPTER AND THEY'RE SO BLUSHY AND SWEET I CAN'T!!

Sometimes We Fall in the Dark - timetoboldlygo - 16k - teen BKG TAKING PHOTOS OF THINGS FOR THERAPY. YOU KNOW WHAT THEY SAY ABOUT HOW YOU PHOTOGRAPH THINGS YOU TREASURE 👀👀👀

Corn Chip - smol_bird - 23k - teen I DONT FUCKIGN KNOW WHY THIS DOESN'T HAVE MORE KUDOS. IT'S LITERALLY SO GOOD. DEMON KIRI IS JOKINGLY SUMMONED BY BKG AND FRIENDS. THEY FALL IN LOVE. KIRI HAS TO LEAVE. BKG IS DETERMINED NOT TO LET THAT HAPPEN. HAPPY ENDING. WHAT ELSE COULD YOU ASK FOR

'cause i love you for infinity - multiclassmaps - 23k - teen SDHFADSJFASD DEMON AU AGAIN. THIS TIME IT'S KIRI THAT DOES THE SUMMONING. BUT WHY DOES BKG SEEM SO FAMILIAR??? WHAT CAN KIRI DO TO MAKE HIM STAY??

to the beat of your heart - drifting_i - 8k - gen BAND AU. KIRI WORKS AT A RESTAURANT AND SOMEHOW BEFRIENDS DRUMMER BKG AND BKG'S BAND CAN'T BELIEVE THAT KIRI GETS AWAY WITH HALF THE SHIT BKG ALLOWS HIM TO

Playing Favorites - vaporeon_ninja - 2k - gen AKSDJFHJADHFKA BKG GETS CALLED OUT ON HIS KIRI FAVOURITISM

(Not Quite) Proposal - imatrisarahtops - 783 - teen DRUNK BKG IS SAPPY WITH HIS BOYF

something worth remembering - bbuggs - 1k - teen DRUNK BKG AGAIN!!! THIS TIME HE DOESN'T REMEMBER KIRI IS HIS HUSBAND AND HE'S SO DISTRAUGHT ABOUT KIRI BEING TAKEN SDFJHSK

A Dragon's Hoard - chezka - 10k - teen kiri gets turned into a dragon bc of a quirk. LOVE HOW DRAGON KIRI STILL LIKES BKG BEST

Love Notes - PurplePersnickety - 5k - teen LOVE NOTES BKG LEAVES LOVE NOTES FOR KIRI IT'S SO SWEET

Define: Oblivious - PurplePersnickety - 45k - teen this is the second part to Love Notes, it's still updating BUT PLEASE CHECK IT OUT TOO BC KIRI DOES STH SO BADASS DURING PRACTICAL TRAINING I LOVE HIM I REREAD THIS NOW AND THEN JUST FOR HOW COOL HE IS IN THAT ONE CHAPTER. also the steady, careful way krbk define their relationship and bkg's demisexuality is so sweet, so good.

The Hard Easy - dirtbag - 4k - teen this one is pretty popular but i still gotta mention it bc. kissing lessons. KISSING LESSONS!!! i love how eagar bkg is askdfhks

Kitsune's Pride - kytrin, Mslead - 147k - explicit okay this was A DOOZY like i???? the plot???? the time travel and the oni and kitsune stuff???? bkg and kiri being badasses??? bkg wanting the best for kiri and angrily supporting him??? this was the first time i kept up to date with a fic when it was still updating and commenting every chapte,r i was so hooked. and ALSO like the authors have written SO MUCH more longfics like this like they have NOVELS and i REALLY rec you check them out like....bro idk how they do they have so much out already and i think and they're updating two more rn and i'm. their bitch tbh

Burden of Proof - kytrin, Mslead - 153k - explicit OK ONE MORE REC FOR THESE AUTHORS. burden of proof is so. so fcukign good. i have adhd and these guys have never one lost me even tho their fics are upwards of 60k. this fic has dragons, it has plot, it has growth and healing and found families and i WISH i could write sth this intricate.

Burger Kings - plantegg - 5k - teen stupid teenage boys being stupid. kiri blackmails bkg into going on a date asjdfhkdsjfakd

Worth a Thousand Words - awareoftheconcept - 43k - teen SDKJFHASKH THIS IS A GUILTY PLEASURE OF MINE I KNOW THE LACK OF COMMUNICATION TROPE IS OVERUSED BUT I CAN'T HELP FALL FOR ANGSTY KIRI AND OMG THE CONFRONTATION SCENE AT THE END IS SO. SO. SO MOVIE-ESQUE I HATE HOW LAME I AM. basically everyone thinks bkg is dating camie asdkjfhskd

Day 6: Fandom - PullingAllMighters, SweetBrew - 9k - mature bkg and kiri don't know each other until they're pro heros and only bc they start a competition to see who's better and they go to each other's signings undercover and develop crushes on each other and deku is an enABLER ASHAHAJFS

Scales Ain't The Same As Feathers - Julietwasanidiot - 2k - gen GOD THIS IS SO CUTE BABY BKG "FINDERS KEEPERS" A BABY DRAGON KIRI SKDHFHD but he thinks kiri is a chicken

Charades - orphan_account - 4k - teen this is just soft....game night....at one point bkg acts out a really romantic word for charades and he's EMBARRASSED SDJFHA. also kiri falls asleep on him and there's some hair stroking....soft...

Cranky-rishima - PurplePersnickety - 29k - teen kirishima is the one with nightmares in this one and he gets CRANKY and BKG has to be the one to reach out and i thought that was such a fresh reversal loved it

No Secrets to Success - kingdoms - 7k - teen THIS IS MY FAV!! MY ABSOLUTE FAV JUST BC I LOVE IT WHEN FICS MAKE PEOPLE GAPE IN AWE FROM HOW SOFT BKG IS WITH KIRI. also krbk forming their relationship outside of school in this au was so??? sweet??? it's just them hanging out together. ALSO KIRI IS SO GOOD AT POKING BKG'S BUTTONS ASJDFHASK

Built to Fall - bigstupidjellyfish - 68k - explicit pro heros fic. they had a bad breakup in third year and oh god the angst is QUALITY. DW THEY TOTALLY MAKE UP AND IT'S SO FCKN WORTH IT. bkg also got therapy so he’s a little more stable as an adult lol

A Name That You'll Remember - heronfem - 33k - mature bkg is a fail!villain. he fell in with the wrong crowd when he was younger. he doesn't actually do anything wrong. in fact, all of his 'crimes' are generally stopped by kiri and somehow all end up exposing corruption anyway, so he's actually helping. kids love bkg. he always makes sure they're safe before he robs a jewelry store or sth. somehow kiri ends up flirting with him in all their fights and bkg has no idea what to make of him. the public can't get enough of them

strawberry mango sweet - redriotinggg - 9k - teen it's just a really sweet smoothie shop au!!! it's good reliable fluff!! what else can you ask for!!

cultivating something so divine - redriotinggg - 10k - teen redriotinggg yet again, i love this au, it's vet!au and kiri is so good at loving animals that bkg hires him and they fall in love and it's also got some competency porn, as in krbk are hella good at their job like power couple ayy

Tension Reduction - acernor - 10k - explicit Kirishima is a massage therapist and Bakugo needs help relaxing.

Mistletoe? Mistletoe. - Tearsaresalty - 2k - teen class 1a keeps making bkg kiss kiri and neither of them really mind wow i wonder why 🙄

[tfw-no-tennis]

animorphs!!!

ok I read animorphs when I was 10 or 11 I think? and I only read it once, along w/the spinoffs and stuff, and I've always meant to revisit it...SO HERE I AM....

and oh MAN I forgot how good this series is. like I knew it was good but some things from your childhood don't hold up yknow? especially books aimed at younger audiences

but oh boy does animorphs hold up. they're easy to read and perfectly balance the line between dark/adult topics and more kid-friendly lessons. excellent 

so yeah I'm loving it so far. I forgot how fast some stuff happens lmao, like I forgot that tobias gets trapped as a bird in the FIRST BOOK 

also I just adore how realistically disorganized/confused the animorphs are. like, they got the elevator pitch version of the conflict from elfangor before my mans got eaten, and also they're middle schoolers. of course they’re always just like ‘wtf do we even do’ 

so like...their plans mostly don't work. and even when planning they run into tons of logistical issues w/morphing, traveling, communicating etc. 

and I love how they clearly need to maintain their normal lives as well in order not to raise any suspicion 

and I like the little details like them not spending all their time together at school because they didn’t before so that would be suspicious

oh man and I love the different family dynamics in the series. you have jake, whose family seems pretty normal until we find out that tom is a controller, and rachel, whose parents are divorced, and who has to deal w/the complications of that. and then cassie, who is an only child (I like that we have a mix, with rachel and jake having siblings), and of course marco...

iirc marco was one of my favs (if not my fav, but its hard to choose) back in the day, and I forgot how reluctant he was to participate in the animorphs thing...and the fact that he was about to quit the team and then runs into visser 1.....

another fucked up little moment I liked - when they morphed dolphin and marco had to morph back to human bc he gets injured and he was like ‘I cant swim, and my mom drowned, I don't want to die like she did’ I was like oooof

also on that topic I adore how little the animorphs know about how anything works. like they once wondered if there's a limit to how many morphs they can acquire and they were basically like ‘idk guess we’ll find out’ 

and then when marco got injured as a dolphin and they were like ‘morph back I guess and hopefully you'll be okay?’ like damn luckily that worked 

basically these books do The Most Excellent Job showing that these are just kids. like they're literally in jr high which is 90s speak for middle school....they're like 13???? at most???

and the narrative reflects that perfectly!! all of them, even rachel who is pretty much the most gung-ho about fighting and stuff, have nightmares and all these terrible experiences bc they don't have basically any guidance 

and even with ax, it’s immediately obvious that he’s also just a kid, even though he’s this deadly alien....

also oh mannnn I love so much how we’re introduced to the andalites as this heroic race and how that slowly changes over the course of the story 

like, when elfangor introduces himself as ‘prince’ you assume he’s part of the andalite monarchy - but later we find out that ‘prince’ is a military rank, and the andalites are a lot more militaristic than we would assume at the beginning 

its so fantastic how it starts off as a fairly black and white conflict of andalites = good guy aliens and yeerks = bad guy aliens

and you even have some background stuff going on w/the taxxons being controllers by choice, and the hork-bajir being enslaved 

but as the story goes on, all of those lines get blurred in different ways...

also ooof the poor hork-bajir. I always felt so bad for them. it’s crazy that even in the first book, the animorphs are killing their enemies - at least I inferred that in book 1, but it becomes way more overt later on...the tough situation of them knowing that the hork-bajir are unwilling hosts but that they’re so dangerous that not killing them could be fatal to the good guys

and ngl this time around I have a lot more sympathy for the yeerks, even tho they don't really deserve it (at least in the early parts of the story where I am rn)

like...they're just these blind helpless slug creatures, but they're also fully sentient and intelligent? like, that's so fucked up. imagine yourself as you are now, but you're just a sensory deprived slug swimming in a pool. that's pretty fucked. and then the fact that the yeerks are biologically made to be parasites...its kinda no wonder that they ended up the way they are (and it also makes stuff like the yeerk peace movement really compelling)

also wow I kinda forgot about all the body horror w/the morphing. like ik that's one of the things that animorphs is known for but like. I forgot how much it happens and how creative the horrifying descriptions are. I love it

and omfg so when I first read this series the ellimist stuff confused me a lot bc I didn't read the books That closely (I mostly wanted to see what would happen next) but I loooove time travel bullshit so I’m really enjoying it so far

even tho tbh I think even if I had paid more attention as a 10 yr old I still would've been confused bc the ellimist stuff is kinda just inherently confusing lmao 

ok and I just love the characters,,,I love that the books switch perspectives, and KAA did such a masterful job of portraying differing and realistic reactions to their situation....like, all the animorphs react so differently to their circumstances, but their reactions are all so grounded in realism and also their personalities 

like man I love rachel. she was one of my favs as a kid too bc I always loved female characters and she was just so cool. and she still is, and so excellently written too 

liiiike the fact that even though she’s so tough and brave, she’s still a kid and has plenty of moments when she’s scared or uncertain...

and I just really like the fact that she out of all of them is the one who’s tough and loves to fight...and the fact that she also unapologetically loves shopping and stuff like that...its about the multifaced characters

just like how marco is the ‘funny guy’ but they make it very clear from the beginning that this is his way of coping w/shit like his family falling apart, and then alien BS 

and also marco is really smart? I kinda forgot abt that (sorry marco) but I like that bc that's uncommon to see with ‘funny’ characters

oh mannnn and ax. I love ax. I forgot a whole bunch about the early stuff w/him and how conflicted he was w/keeping secrets from the other animorphs

KAA did such a fantastic job w/ax - he really comes across as the perfect mix of ‘fish out of water alien’ and ‘young teen/tween’ and ‘alien from a strict militaristic society who is in training to become a soldier like his famous older brother’ 

n that was so sad n fucked up when he called the andalite home world and had to tell everyone (including his parents) that elfangor died, and then the elders or w/e forced ax to take blame for elfangor breaking their laws in order to preserve elfangor’s postmortem reputation, even at the cost of ax’s career/life :( 

and man I loved the part where ax is like ‘well, we didn't help the hork-bajir even tho we could have and now they're all enslaved. I'm not letting that happen to the humans’ and the council or w/e is like ‘well you should let it happen, don't interfere’ and ax basically realizes oh shit sometimes adults are wrong 

basically I love the conflict there, where the andalites are the ones who gave the yeerks the technology that led to them spreading across the galaxy like a disease, and now fight to stop them due to their guilt, but also refuse to directly help the less advanced species who are being invaded by the yeerks for fear of making a similar mistake like w/the yeerks....

ooooof and the part where ax is like ‘guess I have to go fight visser 3 and die’ :( he’s just a babyyyy

and augh when alloran asks them to kill him....geeeez there’s so much fucked up stuff already and I'm not even in the double digits yet 

oh my god and the brutally awful fact that any freed controller will just get tracked down by the yeerks and murdered so the secret invasion stays secret...and the animorphs think that by destroying the kandrona they've freed a bunch of controllers but really they just signed their death warrants - what a catch 22

oh and I love how even early on the yeerks aren't a completely unified force - we have the obvious rivalry w/visser 1 and visser 3, with visser 1 even arranging the animorphs release from visser 3′s prison bc of this, and that yeerk who told ax where to find visser 3 because he was pissed that his yeerk gf got killed by visser 3 - even though the reason she was killed was due to kandrona rationing, which was caused by the animorphs...i love the layers 

ok what else. oh yeah I love tobias sm, he was one of my favs as a kid too, his whole story is so deeply tragic but also interesting and we haven't even gotten into all the stuff w/his parents yet

the part where he’s freaking out as a hawk and he’s gonna fly into the windows even tho he knows it’ll probably kill him...christttt

also tobias and rachel are so romance aughhhh

ok also jake - he was never my favorite when I was younger bc I felt like he had Basic Protag Man Syndrome but now I can appreciate his character a lot more. like, he basically got elected the leader and he’s kinda like ‘guess I have to do this now.’ and that of course ends up fucking him up majorly in the long run bc even tho he’s more serious and responsible, he’s still just a kid too

and I loooove the horror of finding out that tom is a controller, and jake having to contend w/the fact that it’s very likely that he’ll have to fight and/or kill his brother someday 

also the book where jake gets infested w/a yeerk was one of my favs and still is. so fucked up and interesting. the fact that that yeerk was previously tom’s made it even more fucked, w/the yeerk taunting jake the whole time

and then the yeerk dying in jakes head...so messed up

omg and cassie too. I love cassie. I didn't appreciate her as much when I was younger bc I was a straightforward kid who liked action, and cassie is all about pacifism when possible and compassion, which I love a lot now that I Get it more. 

cassie being such a gentle person but still fighting in this fucked up war bc doing nothing would be worse is super compelling. plus the conflicts with her having to figure out where she and humanity fit in the circle of life and whatnot is great

I loved the contrast of her being very aware of how nature works bc of working w/her parents and all these injured animals, but also being so compassionate that it still bothers her to see death and especially participate in it 

like her feeling awful about killing the termite queen even tho its ‘just a bug’ and stuff

basically what makes the series great isn't that it’s got all these fucked up moments and horror elements and is overall quite dark - it’s that all of it comes together to make the point that war is hell, and child soldiers are gonna end up traumatized pretty much no matter what happens

it’s a very strong message, and the story never feels like it’s being dark just for the sake of being dark, but rather never letting the reader forget how awful things are

TL;DR: anirmorphs is to the YA genre what hunter x hunter is to the shounen genre

in animorphs, the heroes of the story are kids who get cool powers and get to fight aliens - in any other YA story they would have a bunch of fun adventures and come out on top most/all the time - things might get darker towards the end, but good would prevail. the evil yeerks would be stopped, and the main couples would get married and have kids and live happily ever after. 

however, war isn't like that, especially when the soldiers are kids. so instead we get animorphs, and it’s brutally realistic. they barely ever get to enjoy their powers - on the rare occasion that they get to, something usually goes horribly wrong

compare to hxh - it seems like a regular shounen story about kids participating in a fantastical mostly-adult world and being able to match the adults bc they're Special - but as the story wears on it becomes clear that the kids are just very traumatized. this all leads to gon’s berserker collapse in the chimera ant arc, which is led up to masterfully w/a bunch of adults treating gon as an adult even though he’s a child.

essentially the same thing happens in animorphs - with jake being shoved into the leader role and becoming a military general as a kid, which leads to him committing horrific war crimes because he’s been put in a position no child should ever have to be in

similarly, kurapika has what would be a very straightforward revenge plotline in any other story - but this is hxh, so the bad guys aren't just 2-dimensional evil caricatures, and the road to revenge just leads kurapika to ruin. we root for kurapika to win bc they’re a character we like, but it becomes clearer and clearer as the story goes on that getting revenge is not the path kurapika should be taking

nothing is ever as straightforward as we want it to be, basically. and the same applies to animorphs. so many times they're faced with conflicts that seem to have an obvious answer, only for it to be revealed later that the choices they made led to other unforeseen awful consequences

ok i need to stop rambling this is already super long. basically: animorphs good. I’ll probably do another post like this semi-soon as I continue reading (I'm partway thru book 10 now)

[tartagliaxx]

first off, hello 🤷‍♀️ anon! sorry i missed you out

and secondly, dw, marius is my favourite too lol, he reminds me a lot of my younger cousin who i lived with when i was younger. i was always the one who took care of him and marius calling me older sister just set off so much memories of my childhood. the both of them are also vv similar in personality, attention seeking, playful and artistic so i always see him whenever i look at marius.

artem is probably my second favourite ngl, ever since i read his ssr where he was jealous and got drunk (what a good combination lmao) i just grew so soft for him. at the end of the day, he's just a vv soft sweetheart who's insecure that we'll leave him :(( i have like 3 ssrs at lvl36, two of them are artem cards and the other is luke. i vibe with luke too bc i love the childhood friends trope, it's top tier. and as for vyn... i have vv mixed feelings abt him. i feel like he could so easily see through me if he was real and i'm just like, how about no. he's rlly pretty though, like rlly pretty.

*major spoilers*

and you've finished the archon quests!!! personally, i feel like the ending felt a bit rushed(?). it's weird bc i thought the resistance war against the raiden shogun was supposed to be the center of the story, but it just devolved to us helping yae with the entire war being swept to the side. and i already knew somebody was gonna die, and as soon as i saw that teppei had become the captain, i just knew.

it's interesting bc i would love to explore what happened to la signora and scaramouche to make them so disregarding of human life. like, i don't like them, but i want to understand their minds. it's sad to read signora's artifact's background honestly. and the fact that her crown said she used to be called rosalyne, that she had perhaps once led a more innocent and naive existence. i dunno, to me it seems like a good ending for her honestly, she had already lost herself after her lover's death and brings pain to many others, i don't think she can rlly return to being her again.

and honestly, a lot of people are talking abt scaramouche not telling signora he already had the gnosis and saying that he orchestrated her death, i don't rlly think so. i feel like he's just that apathetic to human life, even if it's someone that stands on his side, he just doesn't care enough. it also says how he never got along with anyone, not even his fellow harbingers, so i don't know why ppl expect him to seek out someone he doesn't like just to warn her of danger.

i vibe with scaramouche and la signora as the antagonists bc they're good antagonists, but as characters, well. other than the fact that they're pretty, they have like one likeable trait and that is their loyalty. they would do anything for the tsaritsa even if it cost them their life. i'm rlly excited to see what the tsaritsa has in store for us in the future.

considering our sibling is nicknamed 'the prince/princess', i wonder if there's gonna be a day where we're gonna have to go toe to toe with them. if we had them backed them into a corner with no way out, i wonder if they would kill us. it would be an interesting twist if we could actually die, but i feel like the protagonist halo will prevent it lol and i'm sorry bc god, this is so long.

— r. anon

marius. that’s the tweet. man,, you dont realize how in love i am w him?? like,, this man was literally my only hope when i fell horribly sick. i cant w myself now that i’m hearing it w my own voice. it must be nice to remember the good ol’ days… i despise my cousins and i dont have siblings so i dont really have that sort of connection w him. to me, his onee-san is just a joke? a petname? idk but it simultaneously makes me so mad and giddy just like childe’s existence does

i like vyn bc his vibes are sus but at the same time, he’s cares abt our mental health 🥺👉👈 no one’s ever said shit like that to me… jokes aside, luke is seriously threatening his spot bc of his blushing bs like pls 🤲 i’m so weak for that shit give me more. artem makes me soft too like,, he keeps mentioning that he trusts us and he’s just…. HE’S A BIG TEDDY BEAR THAT BLUSHES AT LIKE ACCIDENTAL HAND BRUSHES GRRRR. in conclusion, i love them all.

but man,, give me ssr luck… literally, im in pain…

now that the excitement’s worn off, i can now judge things properly. i think that… the pacing is horrible. like the plot is good, genuinely, but there’s just,, so much to explore abt this. if you think abt it, this is the climax and yet we didnt get much. scratch that. we got a lot but it’s all underdeveloped that it felt like nothing. we go to sangonimiya, got promoted, became captain for like, one sec before we are sent onto an investigation that didnt really produce any results bc app teppei alr knows everything? and then the delusion thing is a good plot point but it’s not really explored? just… a lot of things are left unexplored and i think that story wise, a lot of the possible lore explanations went down the drain. it would’ve been nice if we saw more abt the rebellion and if we had gotten to know whats the real deal w the commissions but eh… idk… i would’ve rather done more quests abt this whole storyline than like… do that whole dance w the three people who lost their vision in 2.0.

if im going to be honest, la signora is such a wasted character. like maybe her death was just for the shock factor or maybe it’s to prepare us for more harbinger encounters in the future.. idk but she’s such a good character from what we’ve seen but we know jack shit abt her and her motives. we know a little from the artifact set but beyond that, what do we have?

precisely! that’s how i feel abt this whole thing when we’re talking seriously. like w ei, i dont really agree w whatever they’re doing but i want to understand why they do the things that they do. everything has a reason and their psychology is just interesting to me.

i think scaramouche’s nature makes it easy for him to disregard human life. call it arrogance or whatever but ultimately, he’s seeing himself as smth above all these people bc he’s more or less capable of standing toe to toe w a god. why should he bother telling signora? it’s not like he gains anything if he does. i think that when he got the gnosis, he’s just ‘well she dies if she dies. who cares abt that? i dont have any need for incompetent colleagues anw’ i agree and i dont think he orchestrated her death but at the same time, he just allowed it to happen too.

as for signora, i’m actually surprised? for the most part, i think that the harbingers took their posts for selfish reasons. for scara, it’s to entertain himself and pass time. for childe, it’s to fight and grow stronger. for dottore, it’s to conduct dubious research w/o anyone stopping him. i expected signora to have some similar motive like power or money but it seems like she does actually believe in the tsaritsa? it would be very intriguing if signora’s main motive in becoming a harbinger is simply bc she is loyal to the tsaritsa and her will. bc in contrast, i think scara and dottore are more loyal to the fact that the tsaritsa can give them what they want, not bc they actually like her. actually, idek if they’re willing to die for her lol. like i wouldnt be surprised if they suddenly abandon post in a life or death situation but who knows…

in any case, they are very good antagonists. i like yo think that the tsaritsa isnt as bad as the game portrays her to be… of all the gods, she’s the one im looking forward to the most but… haha… what version would that be….

i’m almost certain that they’ll make us fight our twin maybe before we face the unknown god? if one of them dies, i would be very sad. like legit. but knowing mhy, well, our twin is almost 100% a walking death flag.

anw i’m shutting up rn— i also spoke too much kahdjabdhakbsjansb—