#because you have so many good memories of her taking you for a drive every week when you were a little kid or whatever

[leomonae]

This woman is still actively fucking up my country and our capital city, incidentally.

Beira's Place is a privately owned and operated domestic violence service that was formed to provide support to women aged 16 and over in Edinburgh and the Lothians who are survivors of sexual violence. The organization does not serve transgender women.

Their board includes a former leader of the Scottish Labour Party, and a former manager of the Glasgow & Clyde Rape Crisis Centre.

This was a number of years back and I'm working off memory, but I've heard accounts too from a couple people living in Edinburgh at the time of Rowling trying to pressure existing domestic violence organisations into excluding trans women. I have no doubt that she has made it a much more hostile place for any such women seeking assistance.

I haven't purchased a HP item in close to a decade - I use the books I already had as doorstops or to prop a laptop up for meetings nowadays.

There is NO "death of the author" with JK Rowling - she controls and continues to profit from her IP, and uses that money to fund hate groups.

[littleslaywrites]

serendipity | spencer reid x reader 

summary: five times spencer doesn’t listen to the signs telling him to approach you + one time he does

word count: 4.7k

cw: f!reader, slow burn, fluff, 5+1, invisible string theory, a little bit of angst

1.

Three minutes. That’s how long Spencer has to get in his car and start driving to be at work on time. He calculated the time that morning, when he had woken up earlier than usual and decided on a whim to try the coffee shop that had just opened. 

He doesn’t know what makes him turn around. Maybe it was his training, forcing him to be aware of his surroundings at all times. Maybe it was your voice. “One iced mocha with an extra shot of espresso,” you say. Maybe it was fate. 

Whatever it was, it made him pause dumping the packet of sugar into his to-go cup and face the back of your head as you dug through your purse to find your wallet. He keeps his eyes trained on you, putting the lid back on the cup. 

When you turn, he forgets about the time he was wasting as he stops and stares. He forgets about how many sugars he’d used already. He even forgets his own name for a second. And he never forgets anything. 

But something about the way the morning sun brushes its golden touch across your face has him brainless. His thoughts only came back to him when your eyes flitted up and met his. 

In that moment, he wants to approach you, tell you that you might be the most beautiful creature he’d ever seen. Even more so when your lips pull into a tiny smile. He’d been a profiler long enough to know that the way your eyes ran from his was a sign that you were probably waiting for him to approach. 

Just when we goes to grab his cup and walk up to you, he catches a glimpse of his watch. Ten seconds. He’d run out of time. He considered his options, choosing timeliness over what he might have with you. 

You watch him leave, a little surprised. You were sure he was going to introduce himself. Brushing it off, you determine it’s not meant to be, a mantra you repeat every time something slips away from you.

Pulling into the parking garage, Spencer feels a pang of regret. He really didn’t need to be on time. Morgan had made a habit of being five minutes late. As long as there wasn’t an urgent case, he probably could’ve afforded the time it would take to get your number. 

Paperwork gives him a solace from his thoughts, distracting him as he gets lost in reports. He almost forgets you. Almost. 

2.

Two weeks later, Spencer is wandering the walls of books, looking for some new reading material. He’s finished everything he’d had in his apartment, and was now holding a stack that’d last at least five days. 

Scanning the shelves, he finds one that catches his eye. When he goes to reach up, his fingers brush against someone else’s hand. His immediate reaction is to fight a small freak-out, not wanting the stranger to contaminate him. 

Pulling his hand back, he looks over to see someone else doing the same. Not someone. You. 

He recognizes you instantly, memories of the café coming back to him. 

“Sorry,” you say, hand returning to clutch your own stack of books. 

He’s frozen in place. You’ve stunned him. Not because of the usual reasons of germs or stranger danger, but because it’s you. He realizes he’s frozen in place, which makes his internal panic worse. 

In the seconds where he’s staring, you realize where you’d seen him before. It was coffee shop boy, as you’d nicknamed him when you’d texted your friends about how you’d just seen the cutest boy at that new café down the road. 

Your heart skips a beat, and you try to fight off the blush you’re sure is currently invading your cheeks. 

Say something, you think, trying to fix the uncomfortable moment. 

“You’ve got good taste,” you force out, awkwardly trying to make some kind of conversation. 

Her eyes are prettier up close, he thinks, hand involuntarily clenching from the brief touch. 

He knows he should say something to you. He really does. It’s just that he can’t. He gives you a subtle nod, then escapes in between another aisle. He meant to find at least twice the amount of books he ended up with, but you had sent him into such a panic that he ended up checking out and walking out before he realized what he was doing. 

You were left slightly stunned by the interaction, partially confused by the way he hurried out. You chalked it up to him being some kind of introvert, not wanting to talk to you. You could only hope that he didn’t find you repulsive or something, mind going to the worse places. Just like in the coffee shop, you let it go, assuring yourself you’d see more cute boys in bookstores in the future. Hopefully some that had as good of a taste in books as coffee shop boy. 

Closing the door to his apartment behind him, Spencer realizes how he’s acting. He feels like a kid again, the same awkward schoolboy who was too young to be like the boys who had a girl on their arm as they walked through the halls. Setting the books down on his coffee table, he tries to not think about how he never truly learned to ask someone out. One day, he thinks, one day I’ll find the courage.

3.

Rain has pelted the ground all afternoon, defying the forecast that called for sunny skies. Spencer, in his usual preparedness, had brought an umbrella to work just in case. 

The past week, Prentiss told him about an exhibit in D.C. that she thought he’d want to see. It was a museum he frequented, so he set out on Friday afternoon to make a quick trip to the city. 

When he got on the metro, he pulled out a book to pass the time. He hardly looked up when he got lost in a book, only listening for the announcement that he’d reached his intended stop. 

Something drew his eyes up, though, just like the morning in the coffee shop. 

It was you again, this time soaking wet. You’d gotten caught in the rain, trusting the forecast. You just have to get home, you keep telling yourself as you shiver on the plastic seat. 

Sensing someone looking at you, you glance up. Spencer brings his eyes back to his book, looking but not reading. 

There he is again. Coffee shop boy. He doesn’t usually take this train, you think. Maybe that means something.

As soon as that thought crosses your mind, you remember the bookstore, the way he ran from you. Your friends had reassured you, telling you to stop catastrophizing. You hoped that he was simply antisocial, but part of you still was stuck on the possibility that he hated you for some reason, sent from universe to humble you.

So you don’t move closer to him. Besides, you could only imagine that you don’t look your best, already feeling the way your hair is frizzing up. 

Spencer’s heart is currently beating so hard that he thinks it’s trying to break out of his chest. Even after you’ve been caught in the rain, you’re stunning. He remembers the past two interactions, suddenly embarrassed by the way he acted. He couldn't just go up to you, especially after the way he ran at the bookstore. 

When he reaches his stop, you move to get up. Dread mixes with hope inside you both as you realize you’re walking out together. 

You keep trying to lose him, but your steps are sinking up. Climbing the stairs, you sigh at the sight of rain. 

Spencer thinks to offer you his umbrella, to walk you wherever you’re going. It’d make up for his other two mistakes, giving him an in to start a conversation with you. 

Approaching the mouth of the station, you can only hope your bag is watertight enough to keep your laptop dry. A more romantic part of you hopes coffee shop boy will stop you before you reach the end of the steps. 

Spencer hesitates, takes too long to decide if he’ll approach you, and you turn to walk the opposite direction before he can say a word. Opening the umbrella, he turns to watch you walk away, sympathy creeping in as you hug yourself in the cold. 

Cowardly. That’s the only word he can think of to describe his behavior. He’s embarrassed. It’s not gentlemanly, letting you walk away in the rain when offering the umbrella would’ve been easy. 

When he makes it to the museum, he’s hardly in the mood to enjoy the exhibit. This time, he can’t seem to push you out of his mind. 

4.

Fall turned to winter quickly, the rain turning to snow. Spencer was thankful, since he thought of you every time it rained. He thought of the way you shivered down the street, alone as the droplets accosted your beautiful face. He thought of the way he acted, not even telling his mother that he’d seen you again. He’d written about you the first two times, but couldn’t bear to describe your third meeting. He knew all too well that his mother would have something to say about his lack of courage. 

He was a worrier, the incident in the rain being no exception. His imagination even went so far as to picture you getting deathly ill from the cold, Pride and Prejudice style. 

He pictured walking you home. Maybe you’d invite him inside, offering a cup of coffee to warm both of you up. Then he pictured you alone, stepping into your apartment in your damp clothes. He wished the former was the reality.

Spencer changed his routine, something he usually despised, simply to wake up earlier to get a morning coffee in hopes of seeing you there. This incited comments from the team, telling him the office coffee couldn’t be so bad that he needed to stop somewhere before work. 

“It’s just a way to clear my head,” he said. 

“Sure,” Morgan replied, knowing he’d been slightly distracted the first morning he’d visited the shop. 

After three weeks of frequenting the shop, he finally saw you again. He’d almost given up, assuming he’d never make it up to you. 

Walking out the door, the wind chill hits him, hands warmed by the coffee in this hand. He's looking down, studying the crunch of the snow under his boots. 

You’re late, usually grabbing your coffee much earlier. It reminds you of the first time you came to this shop. That reminds you of that boy you saw that day. And two other times. Heart leaping, you brush it off, mind focussed on getting in and out before traffic gets worse. 

The snow isn’t too bad, but the wind is stealing the feeling from your fingers. You reach into your bag, pulling out the pair of gloves you’d stashed inside on your way out the door. 

You regret looking down when you feel yourself run into someone walking the opposite way. The gloves fall from your hands, and you crouch to pick them up. 

Before you can grab them, the person you collided with is handing them to you. 

“Thank-“ you begin, words stolen by the realization that the person is no stranger. 

It’s him again, you think. Thankfully, you’re already flushed from the cold, protecting you from any outward reaction to him. 

It’s her again, Spencer thinks, holding the gloves out to you. He prays the trembles away as your hands brush against his. 

The image is comical, two people crouched in the middle of a busy sidewalk as it snows. You’re frozen, gloves in your hand but not pulling them away just yet. 

Realizing this is his chance, Spencer tries to think of something clever to say to you. Something Morgan would say. 

“It’s cold,” he says. 

Fuck. 

“Yeah,” you half speak, half giggle. 

Is that really the best you can do?

He releases the gloves as you both stand up. There’s a brief hesitation, eyes finding each other and smiles creep onto your faces. 

You’re still late, you realize, ending the moment. You look down simultaneously, walking past each other shyly. 

What the fuck, Spencer? he asks himself. He beats himself up all the way to Quantico, feeling like he blew what could be his final chance with you. 

You, on the other hand, are giddy. It was the most he’d ever said to you. Even when your boss gives you a talking to for your tardiness, you're fighting a smile. Coffee shop boy didn’t hate you, not at all. He was awkward, sure, but he didn’t hate you. That’s all you could ask for. 

5.

Spencer tried the café for about two weeks after your encounter, but gave up when you didn’t return, even after he waited three minutes past his usual allotted time. 

The team was at dinner after returning from a particularly exhausting case. At least Spencer’s mind had something else to focus on. With time, he’d forget you. At least as much as Spencer Reid could forget a person. 

You walked into the restaurant, two of your girlfriends in tow. One of them recounted the tale of her last date, a story juicy enough to require a sit-down meal for the official debrief. 

As the host is walking you to your table, you stop in your tracks when you see him. 

“Don’t look now,” you whisper, “but that’s coffee shop boy at that big table.”

“You’re joking,” one of your friends says.

“Which one,” the other whispers.

“The one with the glasses,” you say as you all slowly walk by, slow enough to look but fast enough to not arouse suspicion. 

“Oh, the nerd?” your friend asks, causing you all to break into laughter as you scurry away to catch up with the host. 

The sound draws Spencer’s attention, and he looks up to see you again. He looks down quickly, more than aware that he’s surrounded by profilers. Unfortunately, he’s caught by Morgan, because of course he is. 

“You recognize her?” he teases.

“No,” Spencer murmurs. 

“Then maybe I’ll introduce myself,” he kids, and Spencer forces a half chuckle. 

He wills himself to not think about you, wanting to avoid any more commotion. He distracts himself with the team’s conversations, reminding himself that he’s made it this far without another person. Even if he feels something that’s a hybrid of regret and jealousy when his coworkers talk about their own pursuits. 

At the end of the meal, the waiter brings fortune cookies for the table. Cracking it open, Spencer reads the tiny words on the paper:

“Fate gives you the ink, but you are the one who decides what to write."

Something in his mind clicks. He has to find you. He can’t let you go. There has to be a reason that you kept running into him. 

“I’ll be right back,” he says, wandering toward where the host was leading you. 

He looks for you, but it’s hopeless. You must’ve slipped out when he was distracted. He curses himself. You’ve escaped again, a result of Spencer’s inability to approach you. Part of him wants to run after you, follow every street until he finds you. But he knows the table is waiting for him. So he goes back to sit down, and pays his bill. 

That night, he goes home to his empty apartment. The silence he always enjoyed is suddenly deafening. Five chances, and he blew all of them. 

Spencer has learned to deal with disappointment. He’d learn to love the loneliness, filling his mind with knowledge, one part of him that he could keep from being empty. The emptiness always found him, though. It found him when his father left, when those kids tied him up on the football field, when the nightmares started and he’d wake up alone and afraid. And it found him tonight, when the weight of his lack of courage sank in. 

Your friends drove you home, and you let them take the front seat while you sat in the back. As they talked, you felt the weight of the empty seat next to you. The two of them entertained you with their stories of romance, but it was just that— entertainment. Hell, one of them was engaged, and you hadn’t had a date since you’d moved to D.C. Maybe that’s why you were so stuck on coffee shop boy, the brush of his hands being the most romantic touch you’d felt for a while. 

Suddenly, you were annoyed. Annoyed at the way your friends acted when you told them about a cute boy, excitement that you even had the semblance of a chance, a fraction of what came so easily to them. You were annoyed at yourself, alone on a Friday night in a city full of people. You were annoyed at the way coffee shop boy ignored you, meeting multiple times with less than ten words between spoken. 

For all you knew, he had a girlfriend, a fiancée. Maybe that’s why he avoided you. 

When your friends dropped you off at your apartment, they waited for you to get inside the doors. Nobody would be waiting inside for you. You imagined how it must feel to have a smiling face to greet you. In your fantasy, it was coffee shop boy, his brown eyes looking at you for as long as you wanted him to, his hand finding yours without pulling away. 

Your bed felt a little colder that night. The universe could send you the same man five times, and you’d still end up without knowing as much as his name. You wondered where he was now, probably with the blonde he was laughing with when you were leaving the restaurant. It’s not meant to be, you repeat, not fully believing it, but letting the phrase lull you to sleep, anyway. 

+1

Another Valentine’s Day approached quickly, and you knew that it would likely be spent alone. Not alone, exactly, as you would be spending it at your best friend’s wedding in another state. You’d tried to find a plus one, scouring dating apps for any eligible bachelor that’d make you look less lonely at the ceremony. It proved futile, so here you were, alone in your hotel room. 

You slipped on the mini dress, a matching color as the rest of the bridesmaids. Your best friend had chosen a bar for her bachelorette. All of you were unfamiliar with the area, making you feel a little uneasy, especially since there had been a series of murders in the area that had brought the FBI in to investigate. Luckily, they’d reported that night that the suspect was in custody, so the night out was still on. 

When you walk into the bar, you know right away that it wasn’t your scene. It was loud, hectic, and slightly overwhelming, but you sucked it up for your friend’s sake. This was her night, so nothing would stop you from celebrating her. 

Looking around, you find the bar is mostly filled with middle aged men who are unsuccessfully flirting with the younger girls. You probably should’ve known that this wasn’t the night you’d end up meeting anyone worthwhile. It didn’t really matter, though, as your friends are quickly on the dance floor.

Spencer didn’t necessarily love when the team went out to bars after a case was solved. It wasn’t his scene, loud music and unruly patrons. He could get over it, as long as it meant spending time with his friends. 

It was windy that night, causing the jet to be delayed. Emily had been the one to suggest going out instead of sitting around on the tarmac. Everyone was at a table in the corner of the closest bar they'd found on Google maps. Spencer was observing the people around, one particular group catching his eye. On the dance floor, he saw flashes of a sash that said “Bride to Be”. He wasn't sure what about the group caught his attention, but he found himself looking up every now and then to see if the girls had escaped the dancing crowd to somewhere more open. 

As his coworkers complained about the delay, Spencer realized that it was February 13th. He’d never had a Valentine before, unless you counted his mother and the candy hearts she’d buy for him every year. His friends had people to return to, people waiting when they got off the jet. He longed for a reason to complain about missing the holiday, but to Spencer, it would be just the same as any other day. 

After about half an hour of dancing, you slithered between the moving bodies to find the bar. You took a seat at one of the barstools, ordering your favorite drink to cool you off from the heat of the dance floor. 

Spencer sees your figure from behind, and knows right away who you are. For a second he doubts himself, not believing you were halfway across the country at the same time he was, but his memory had never failed him before. 

JJ sees his eyes following you, and asks “Do you know her?”

“Yeah,” he says, standing up. “I do.”

He’d promised himself that, if he had another chance, he’d approach you. He knew he had to, regret tinting his memories. 

And here you were, in some small town, serendipitously in the same place once again. He couldn’t ignore it, determining it must be fate, an idea that went against his leanings toward practicality. 

He’d tried to explain it away with logical explanations. Even if it was coincidence, he thought the shared locations meant you were compatible. That’s why he was so bothered by the way you had disappeared that night in the restaurant. He’d finally had the courage to approach you, and you’d escaped. 

This time was different, though. You were firmly in place at the bar. This time, nobody would pull either of you away. Not on Spencer’s watch.

“Excuse me,” he said, taking the seat next to you. “I’m sorry, I don’t want to bother you-“ he stutters.

You’re shocked. Surely, your eyes are wide, and he can tell you know who he is. Trying to cover up the way your jaw dropped, you say “We’ve met before.”

“We have,” he says. He’d planned what he’d say to you, thinking of every possible situation or smooth line that would win you over. “A few times, actually.”

“What are you doing all the way out here?” you ask, nervous at the amount of words you were exchanging. Coffee shop boy had been on your mind for six months now, and here he was, sitting beside you. 

“Work,” he answers, causing you two to fall into a silence. It’s not awkward, the way you look at each other. It’s more of a studied silence, ensuring your eyes weren’t deceiving you. 

Spencer is the one to break the silence. “I meant to approach you earlier, it’s just that I’m…”

“An introvert?” you finish his sentence for him. 

“Yeah, I guess. I tried to find you the last time I saw you, in that restaurant, but you’d already left.”

“You tried to find me?” His confession takes you by surprise. “Honestly, I thought you hated me.”

“Of course not,” he says quickly. “I just get…. nervous. 

“Yeah, I gathered that.” You giggle together. “Maybe this is weird, but I feel like I know you already.”

“You kind of do. You’ve seen me in five other places already. You could put together my routine if you really wanted to.”

Another quiet moment overtakes you. It’s comfortable, like two friends who know each other well enough to not need words. 

“I’m here with my friends,” you explain, wanting him to know everything about you. “It’s her bachelorette party.”

“That’s more fun than my reason,” he says, glancing back towards his coworkers. 

He explains his job, then, taking you by surprise. He didn’t strike you as the fed kind of guy, considering you know him through bookstores and coffee shops. He tells you about how he ended up in his line of work, how he finished school at an age when you hadn’t even learned to drive. 

Then you explain your job. And your friends. And why you moved to D.C. And everything else you can think of. Before you know it, an hour has passed. Part of you feared that, in getting to know him, he’d lose his appeal. You’d constructed an image of him in your head, and you worried that it would be too high of an expectation for him to live up to. You were proven wrong. He exceeded the version of himself that had been created in your imagination. 

He’s taken out of the conversation only by Hotch's tap on his shoulder. “The plane should be taking off soon,” he says. He nods, making plans to meet you again when you return home. He writes down his number on a receipt, and you tuck it delicately in your pocket, afraid to lose it, to lose him again. 

“I forgot to ask,” you stop him before he can walk out. “What’s your name?”

“Spencer.”

And then he’s out the door. This time, his retreat doesn’t leave you with the same hurt it had the last five times. You feel fuzzy, warm, like you were right where you needed to be. 

Spencer, you think. No longer coffee shop boy, he now had a name, a story. You turn his name over in your head, and it rattles around like a weight and makes your mind hazy when you join your friends again. 

“Who was that?” 

“You’ll never believe this, but it was coffee shop boy,” you reply. 

“You’re kidding! What was he doing here?”

“Work.”

“Huh. Serendipity.”

Serendipity. Your friend threw the word out, speaking it lightly before going back to dancing. Yet, it stuck to you, grabbing on and not letting you go. 

You weren’t looking for Spencer any of the times you ran into him, yet he was there. A gift waiting on days where you were otherwise preoccupied. You put a hand in your pocket, feeling the paper with his number waiting for you on it. It was material evidence of the connection you had, a piece of him left behind until you met again. 

Spencer didn’t believe in fate. He hated when people said “everything happens for a reason”. It was the opposite of a comfort, and he refused to believe that the bad things in his life were destined for him. 

However, something about you had planted a seed of doubt, watering it every time he ran into you again. It blossomed tonight with the ease of your conversation. You felt good, you felt right, you felt fated. If there was a destiny for him, he was sure you were part of it. 

He could ignore his friends' teasing. Morgan asked him questions on the jet that he refused to answer. He pretended to be asleep, eyes closed as the vision of you overtook him. Someday, they’d find out about you. Your roots had intertwined with his already, locking your stories together. For now, though, you were his. His own personal offering from whomever sent you into his life. Even if he’d messed up the first few chances, you kept finding him, even where it was least expected. 

Serendipity, he thinks. Finding something good when you’re not looking for it. 

The definition swims in his head, still hazy from your encounter. He wasn’t looking for you that morning in the coffee shop, nor any other time. So he chose to believe it was fate. He allowed himself this one moment to ignore logic and everything he’d been taught. He allowed himself to suspend his disbelief and ride the flutters of his heart to you. 

There had to be a reason. A reason that you kept finding each other. A reason why your conversation flowed with such ease. And, without your knowing, you gave it the same word. Yours spoken by your friend, his from a memory of an old movie his mom used to watch. You were apart, as he sat on the jet and you danced with in the bar, but your minds synced up as you both thought the same thing: Serendipity.

[zorosangell]

⛥ﾟ・。 vice admiral

synopsis: after receiving some terrible news by news coo, you're left completely devastated. the crew does their best to console you, to no avail... and zoro realizes that, for once, his actions won't speak louder than his words... and makes a promise he's willing to die to keep.

cw: fluff with a decent dash of angst, parental death if that's triggering for you, reader calls her dad papa, comfort, zoro is once again down bad for reader, their relationship is super cute, zoro hates romance books.

a/n: listened to a lot of sad music for this

"They clashed, blades sparking and bodies twirling in an epic dance of death," you read aloud, completely enraptured by the book. "Their love was strong, but the hatred that kept them apart was stronger... It seemed that violence would once again be the driving force of their separation... as well as their rejuvenation."

Zoro gagged, keeping up the cadence of his push-ups as he rolled his eyes, glancing at you on his back with a raised brow.

Seriously...?

"You told me this book was about swordsmanship..." he grunted out, turning his gaze back to the grassy deck. "For the past three chapters... they haven't shut up about their rival families... or their... love for each other."

You let out a small snicker at his annoyed tone, a cheeky grin stretching across your lips as you turned the page.

"Well, if I told you about the romance part, you wouldn't have let me read it," you stated, simply.

"Gee, I wonder why..." he scoffed, voice dripping with sarcasm.

"Hey!"

You flicked him in the back of the head, donning a small pout as he sighed, grumbling to himself something along the lines of:

"Always with the pout... she knows I hate the damn pout..."

It was Calisthenics Day, and with such beautiful weather, Zoro had decided to take his training outside, which meant dragging you out of your room to join him.

Even though he always deflected when asked about it, everyone knew that incorporating you into his workouts was one of his many guilty pleasures.

Wearing you like backpack during his pull-ups...

Having you take a nap on his barbell as he bench-pressed...

Plopping you down on his back for push-ups as you read...

He loved it.

He loved being in your presence because, to him, it felt oddly intimate—having you so close as he worked hard to get stronger, honing his body with the goal of protecting you in mind.

Not to mention it fluffed up his ego, being able to lift up and toss around his woman with such ease.

He was only a man... and couldn't help the renewed confidence he gained after every workout.

"Well, I didn't completely lie. The book's got sword-fights in it," you defended, flipping back through the last few chapters.

"Yeah, one every fifty pages," he scoffed once again. "And they're not even good. Who the hell dances in the middle of a fight?"

Your brows flattened, incredulously.

'Jeez...'

"Zo', it's figurative language. They're not actually dancing."

"Figurative... what?"

"Figurative language. Writers use it to make descriptions more interesting."

"Why don't they just say what they mean and be done with it?"

"'Cause that's boring."

"It would make this crap less confusing. Too many blinding smiles and sparkling eyes. Just say the girl looks nice and move on."

You sighed, not at all surprised by his response.

'He's so backwards...'

Zoro was a man who found it hard to say I love you, yet had no problem throwing himself in front of a bullet for you.

Really.

Most girls got bouquets and chocolates from their lovers after their one month anniversary, but you got to patch him up after he was hit in the chest by a fucking cannonball, all because you were in its line of fire.

A rather heart-warming yet terrifying problem to have.

The memory brought a small smile to your face, your lips letting out tiny chuckle as you recalled the scene.

"Gods, Zoro, why the hell did you do that?!" you sniffled, a few tears rolling down your cheeks as he coughed up another round of blood. "I could've dodged!"

He chuckled, painfully, wiping the corner of his mouth with the back of his hand.

"With your reaction time?" he weakly teased, raising a brow as he sat up, "I don't think so."

Clutching his side, he let out a wince, pulling away his hand to see his blood was soaking through the bandages you'd applied.

"This is serious! Stop moving or you're gonna tear it open again!" you scolded, glassy eyed and wobbly lipped as you pressed your hand against his chest, forcing him to lay back down. "Gods, you're so stupid... why did you do that?"

After working tirelessly for a whole hour, Chopper was able to stabilize him, the cannonball having nearly tore off the whole of his side, and the organs along with it.

The doctor said it was a miracle, and medically improbable, that the man was still alive.

Zoro paused a moment, breathing slightly shallow as his eyes bore intensely into yours.

He knew exactly why...

"'Cause it was you..."

"Guys! News Coo's here!" Nami called, exiting her office and snapping you out of your thoughts.

Instantly, your mind pushed away the doom and gloom, making room for the wide grin that broke out on your face.

"Yes!" you cheered, jumping off Zoro's back, the man cracking a small smile at your excitement.

'Must be her dad...'

"Ooo, I wanna see!" Luffy exclaimed, swinging over from the figurehead. "I hope my bounty went up!"

"Me, too!" Chopper agreed, bursting from the med bay.

"Wait for me~!" Brook sang, jumping down from the balcony of the crow's nest.

"I call dibs on the funny papers!" Usopp perked up from his spot on the higher deck, tinkering with a new gadget of his.

"Let's see what's new in the world today," Robin mused with a smile, crossing her arms as she walked over to join the rest.

"It's been so long! I wonder how my father's doing!" you squealed, brimming with joy. "I bet he's captured a ton of other pirates!"

"Wait, (y/n), isn't your dad a marine?" Chopper asked, tugging at your arm.

"Yup!" you nodded, proudly. "One of the best there is! Back when he was in his prime, he was one of the strongest in the Navy! He even fought Gold Roger!"

"GOLD ROGER?!" Chopper and Brook exclaimed, shocked.

With a grin, Luffy threw a stretchy arm over your shoulder, literally pulling himself into the conversation.

"Yuh-huh! He and my grandpa are good friends!" your captain confirmed. "They go way back!"

Like Garp, your father was less than pleased to find out that you'd run away from home to become a pirate, much less a pirate with his best friend's grandson.

But, after some time, he learned to accept your decision, and even went as far as saying so in person, reuniting with you on Dressrosa and assuring that he still loved you with all his heart—you had feared he hated you for your decision.

He promised you both would meet again someday, and probably have to fight, given your luck.

So you promised to get even stronger, that way you'd be able to kick his ass back to the Red Line.

Let's just say your head got a good bonking for that one...

"Here, (y/n)," Nami smiled, tossing you the rolled up newspaper. "Take first look."

Giddily, you caught it, giving her a quick nod of thanks before flipping through the pages, searching for your father's name.

Until you found it.

"I found him!" you grinned, skimming through the article. "It is with a heavy heart that the Navy mourns the loss of one of its finest. Vice Admiral (d/n)..."

Your voice trailed off at the end, nearly dying completely as the words rang in the air, sounding foreign, despite it being you that said them.

Zoro froze mid-push up, eyes wide.

'Oh, no...'

Nami quietly gasped, hands rising to cover her mouth in shock, the others sharing similar expressions.

"After failing to return from a routine patrol of the sea surrounding Dunga, the vice admiral was reported missing. Naturally, the Navy sent out a search party, and discovered his ship floating aimlessly a few miles away from the island, battered beyond repair," you continued, frantically searching for some sort of catch. "According to Vice Admiral Momonga's report, upon boarding, the party found his body, along with the bodies of his entire squadron, on deck, each of them dead by varying causes."

No...

It wasn't true...

It couldn't be...

'Papa...'

You chest felt like it was going to cave in on itself, but you couldn't keep yourself from reading, still hoping for a twist.

"Of course, given the ship's close proximity to Pirate Island, it is safe to assume that the Blackbeard Pirates were the perpetrators of this deed. But, nonetheless, we are still left to grieve over this monumental loss..."

Shaking, your legs finally gave out, dropping you to your knees and your hands tightly gripped the newspaper, crumpling the pages.

"Oh, (y/n)..." Nami dropped to join you, a sorry expression on her face as she rested a comforting hand on your shoulder. "I'm so sorry."

You stayed stiff as a board, still in a state of shock.

Your father loved you with every bone in his body.

He was the man that taught you how to fight after finding out you were being picked on.

The man that kissed away your boo-boos after your daily adventures in the woods.

The man that held you during a thunderstorm after finding you hiding under his covers.

The man that paraded you around the house whenever you were sad, just to see you smile.

And despite the fact you ran away from home, despite the fact you joined the side he'd been fighting for over half his life... that reality never changed.

You were still the same, old (n/n) to him, and he was still your papa.

The papa... that you would never see again.

Your throat let out a wail of sorrow as you crumpled into Nami, clutching the paper tightly in your hands.

Everyone froze, hearts breaking at your sadness, expressions falling at the sight.

Your shoulders rocked with sobs, tears rolling down your hot cheeks like rivulets, your brows cinched in a look nothing short of agony.

You couldn't breathe, your chest heaving with effort as it attempted to retain the air you pushed out with your bawling.

"It can't—! I won't—!" you sputtered, coughing and gasping in an attempt to form the words. "He promised me! H-He promised me I'd see him again!"

"Don't start slackin' on me, kiddo. The next time we meet, it won't be as friendly," your dad smiled, ruffling your hair. "You may be tough now, but you better be a hell of a lot tougher if you wanna stand a chance."

"Psh! The next time we meet I'll be a hell of a lot stronger than you," you scoffed, proudly. "And then I'll kick your ass all the way back to the Red Line!"

"Like hell you will!" he exclaimed, hitting you upside the head with a haki-coated fist.

"OW! Papa, that hurt!" you loudly winced, rubbing the spot

"I love ya, (n/n)!"

"Love you, too, you old jerk!"

A new wave of tears erupted, your sobs becoming even more uncontrollable.

Your mind was completely gone with grief, only one word sticking out among the chaos.

"PAPA!"

Setting himself down on one of the mats in the crow's nest, Zoro's chest tightened, the sound of your wails on a permanent loop within his head.

After hours of consoling, Nami and Robin had finally calmed you to sleep, your body utterly exhausted from all the crying.

Sanji had made a banquet of your favorite foods for dinner, but you didn't eat a single bite.

Brook tried to serenade you with happy songs, but they all seemed to go in one ear and out the other.

Even Luffy tried to make you laugh, but it only made you even sadder, reminded of the times your father tried to cheer you up.

Safe to say, the entire crew was worried sick.

But, in a last ditch attempt to lift your spirits, Usopp and Franky banded together to build an altar in the crow's nest, using one of your father's old newspaper clippings as a photo.

It was beautifully ornate, yet simple, clearly demonstrating the skill and care it took to make it.

They hoped to surprise you with it when you woke up.

But before that... Zoro had to do something.

Using a match, he lit the incense that sat in front of your father's image—the picture of him standing at attention, arms crossed over his chest and expression pulled taut.

He looked strong, like a hero in a comic book, and twice as mean.

Though, if your stories were anything to go off of, he was apparently nothing but a big, old teddy bear.

Clapping his hands together, Zoro shut his eyes, paying his respects.

Without this man, he would've never met you.

Never seen your smile...

Never heard your laughter...

Never held your hand in his...

You were among the most important people in his life, and you wouldn't be the strong, kind, and compassionate woman he knew without your father.

That alone made him deserving of thanks.

But that wasn't the only thing the swordsman was there for...

Opening his eyes, Zoro's hand moved to grab the handle of his Wado Ichimonji, pulling the blade out of its sheath and holding it upright.

"Vice Admiral (d/n)... my name is Roronoa Zoro, and I am the man who will be the World's Greatest Swordsman," he started, deadly serious, looking straight into the eyes of your father's picture. "You don't know me, and I've never had the privilege of meeting you in person. But if there's one thing we have in common... it's (y/n)."

He tensed slightly, as if bracing himself for some harsh attack, letting out a smooth, deep stream of breath to calm his nerves.

"I love her... a lot."

He paused a little awkwardly, but cleared his throat to cover it up, pressing forward.

"Okay... maybe more than a lot," he corrected, glancing down at himself. "But it's because of that I put my life on the line for her every day... and it's because of that I'm worried about her safety."

His gaze sharpened, grip tightening on his sword.

'Bastards...'

"The newspaper revealed (y/n) as your daughter," he stated, jaw set tight. "She told me you tried to hide that, in case any of the pirates you put away managed to escape and seek revenge... but now that the secret's out... and you're dead... it's open season on her head."

He felt anger claw at the back of his throat, threatening to spring loose.

The Navy was fucking useless...

In their lousy attempt to honor the vice admiral's memory, they had inadvertently outed you to the world, completely destroying the years upon years of secrecy your father had worked so hard to protect.

Did they forget about his notoriety?

Forget about the thousands of pirates he'd jailed?

Forget about the countless enemies he'd made?

Forget about the hundreds of dangerous Impel Down escapees?

In your state of mourning, you were incredibly vulnerable, and if a blood-thirsty, revenge-seeking pirate came around wanting to settle a score, he wouldn't give two shits about how you were feeling.

Intentional or not, the Navy had thrown you into the proverbial lion's den.

But it would be a cold day in hell before Zoro let anything happen.

"While she's strong as hell on her own, with you gone, someone's gotta step up to support... be a figure or a name attached to her... strong enough to ward off any unwanted attention..."

He tensed, glancing back up at the picture.

"Which is why I'm here."

Taking another deep breath, he turned his gaze to his sword, now more prepared than ever.

"Vice Admiral (d/n)... I am in love with your daughter. And I solemnly swear from this moment forward... that I will never let her know pain."

His brows furrowed, expression cinched tight in earnest.

"That any weapon, plan, or plot made against her will fall at my blade... that any who come with the intent to harm her will be struck down without a second thought."

What Zoro saw that day scarred his heart for the rest of his life.

To see you so distraught... so crushed... broke a piece of him as well, and it was clear based off the others that gestures would not be able to break through to you.

So, for once, he would have to let his words speak louder than his actions.

"That I will stay by her side until she no longer needs me... that I will protect her with my every breath... that I will be a friend, a guard, a partner, or none at all at if she wants me to be..."

He paused, taking a second to make sure he was ready for the next part.

"But most importantly... that I will love and care for her just the same," he finished, before firmly tucking his sword back in its sheath. "She'll be protected... so don't worry."

A smirk rose to his lips, his eyes finding their way back to the man's picture.

"Soon enough, she'll have the World's Greatest Swordsman as her bodyguard."

[i-am-hungry-24-7]

[Hey, how are you?] Simon Riley*F!Reader

Ten years ago, Simon lost you due to his mistake, and he meets you again after these years of regret.

Hurt and comfort, Happy Ending

“Are you married?”

He always be asked when others see the ring on his finger.

“No.” He answers while taking another sip of his wine, letting the person realize it’s a topic they don’t have the authority to dig in.

He still remembers the vow he chanted as he put the ring on your finger.

The memory is as clear as the day you left the house, and he never saw you again.

It’s his fault, you didn’t shed many tears when he yelled at you, saying that you will never be able to free him from his nightmares, who do you think you are? a fucking philanthropist?

He knew he screwed up everything the moment his taunt escape his mouth.

No, No. I didn’t mean to say that, I need you, I love you, please don’t leave me.

He watched you lower your head, trying in vain to hide your sadness, but your heart was already shattered into pieces, by him, the man who promised to protect you by any means.

I’m sorry.

The words stuck in his throat when he looked at you stepping out the threshold with your belongings.

Please stay.

The greedy wish was buried inside his heart when you stopped for a second. “Bye, Simon. Take care.” you whispered, and disappeared into the aisle.

Ten years, he’s still unable to move on.

He brainwashes himself repeatedly, she will have a better life without you.

Yet he still opens his phone every time he finishes his therapy sessions, looks at your number, and just stares at the screen for minutes.

His thumb lingers on the “call” button but never dares to press it.

Hey, are you doing alright? I’m sorry, I want you back. I went to therapy after that day. I’m not the same person caged in his past anymore.

I miss you so much.

but how selfish he is if he interrupts your life now? Such a nice person like you deserves someone to cherish you nicely, and treasure you with their whole heart.

That’s why he now stands afar from you, watching you behind the veil of autumn’s breeze.

You’re still stunning, time doesn’t deprive your beauty even a bit.

He gazes at you for a long while, and when you turn around and spot him, it’s obvious that you’re in shock and come to a halt.

The world keeps moving, but the time seems frozen between you two, as you both set eyes on each other and never dart.

You head towards him as he starts hesitating to take the first move.

“Hey.” You look at him with a shallow grin on your face.

“Hey.” He mumbles.

The silence fills the air, but no awkwardness, he’s just too indulged in your presence, which he has been dreaming of for years.

Sorry for that day. How are you doing now? Have you married? Have a partner?...

He has too many things he wants to ask, but his thoughts are like matted wool, until his eyes land on the ring on your finger.

“You’re marrie—“ He questions without a second thought, but the words get cut off instantly due to his realization.

because the ring is paired with the one on his finger right now.

It’s not until you chuckle that he’s back to reality.

“Yes, I’m married, about ten years ago? to an idiot man.”

“Why did you marry him? he’s a bloody dork.”

“Good question. or maybe that’s the reason why I married him.” Shrugging, you then meet his gaze with a smile “How about you? Are you married?”

“Yeah, ten years ago, to a woman that’s too precious for me, so I lost her.”

“If you meet her again, what do you want to tell her?”

“I’ve improved. I’ve reached for help and now I’m not the same man anymore.”

“Anything else you want to say?”

“I miss her every single day, and I hope I can have her in my arms again.”

“Well, I don’t know about her.” you step closer to him. “But I’m sure she will love to have some tea with you as her first compensation from you, what do you think?”

He blinks at the hand you reach out at him, and slowly, he takes it into his palms, that’s befitting to drive away the chill.

Your hand fits well in his, like it’s made for him to serve it with all his warmth, and he’s sure that he will never let go of it again.

“My pleasure.”

a/n: lemme give Simon a fucking punch/j

[inkskinned]

yesterday while feverish i wrote about how boats can moor next to each other like pigeons, cooing with the gentle rap of water against their hull. you once said that that the way i see things - birds in the water, feathers in marina paint - was "childish and naive." you said i'd been misdiagnosed - "it can't all be adhd. you might be just kind of stupid and lazy."

i still do certain things like how you taught me - turn the pillow case inside out before putting it on. drive defensively. hate myself entirely.

the prompt for this poem is "mahler's fifth." i wish it wasn't, but mahler's fifth was our song. it ended up in my book. every person that knows your name has promised me they'll give you one swift rabbit punch, right to the face. dean read the book and showed up on my front porch, drenched in sweat from running the 8 miles at 4 in the morning. he was shaking. pacifist and gentle - he works with children - i'd never seen him furious. a punch isn't going to do it, he said, and then said i'm sorry. i had to come to see if you were okay.

mahler's fifth was mine first, like my girlhood. i like the way each movement piles onto the next movement, each instrument bleeding into the next. i like the horn version the best. before i met you, i danced to it on grass still-wet from sprinklers.

later you would tell me that the way you heard it was somehow better. you understood something in it that i couldn't quite wrap my fingers into. once, on our anniversary, you asked the classical music radio station to play it for us. we missed hearing it because we were fighting. one of the things people get wrong about abuse is that sometimes victims are, like, brutally aware of the stupidity of our situation. what do you mean that you thought i wasn't good enough for you? you? you're just... nothing.

sometimes people can pull the poetry out of your life. i watched my words become clothesline, and then thin out into kite twine. i watched you chew through every good syllable of me. so many good songs and places and moments were ruined. i am glad you didn't like most of my music - less to tie back to you.

but still mahler's fifth. the music swells, and i am 21 and throwing up in a bathroom on my birthday. a woman i will later refer to as lesbian jesus runs a cool hand down my back, her perfect pantsuit starch-pressed. she told me to leave you. she said - and this is true, and not an invention of rhyme or fantasy - i'm you from the future.

i am 22, and i got home from an award ceremony, and i remember you telling me - you act so proud of yourself when you're actually so fucking embarrassing. i took you to disney world. you took my virginity. i gave up visiting spain for a week with my family - i instead choose you, to spend the time just-cuddling. you called it "our fuck week." the music swells. it probably should have been a red flag that for about 3 years - i just gave up on crying. my grandfather died and you said nothing. my uncle died and you ghosted me for 3 weeks. you said i need to protect myself from your ongoing tragedy.

every so often i come back to the memory of one of our last afternoons in person. i had just told you that i wasn't going to law school, despite the free ride - i was going to join a creative writing program. master's in fine arts. i was going to finally do it - i was going to follow my dreams. this blog was already internet-famous. however reluctantly, i would occasionally refer to myself as a poet. i got into umass amherst's writing program for fiction authors. it is one of the the top 5 programs in the country.

wait are you seriously considering actually attending that? dumbfounded, you turned completely towards me in your seat. for the 3rd time in our relationship, you almost crashed the car. you actually want to be a writer?

the first time i went viral, it was for a poem i wrote about you:

he wants to say i love you but keeps it to goodnight because love will take some falling and she's afraid of heights.

every time i see that, i want to throw up. you weren't in love with me, you were in love with the control you had over me. a little truth though: i am afraid of heights. you caught a rabbitgirl and skinned her alive.

mahler's fifth still makes me sick.

give me that back. give me back music. give me back everything i had before you. give me back fearlessness. give me back bravery. give me back a scarless body.

give me back what you took from me.

[simpee9000]

Not Just Friends - Prologue -

Based off this blurb + Fem Reader : Not edited : 3.2k Words : Full M.List

Childhood best friends turned into something more, at least with the label. Katsuki Bakugo, a fast-rising hero and fast-learning guy who is ever so slow in getting attached to and loving someone. Even three long years into a relationship, and your friends even forget you're even dating. Nothing happening, spare a few kisses.. like 3 kisses, during high school. Graduated and living together, and you guys have done absolutely nothing to further the relationship. Are you sure you're not just friends? (this is just a prologue, all chapters will have a different writing style) CW: Smut, brief domestic violence discussion, virginity loss, gore with pro hero stuff (lmk if i missed any) (applies to all chapters regardless if it's discussed or not)

Bakugo, or to you, Katsuki has been a huge figure in your life. Probably the biggest motivator as well. There since you were young and immature, running around in random neon clothes your mom let you wear after your 4-year-old self argued with her for half an hour.

You were the third addition to Katsuki and Izuku's friendship. Butting in on their rivalry often. Defending Izuku while shooting Katsuki a nasty glare. Helping Izuku with his bruises but also helping Katsuki with his, if he ever got any. You stuck to either boy's side, depending on who you saw first. Which, more often than not, was Katsuki. But you left his side whenever he picked on Izuku. Helping Izuku's muddy self get out of the river before considering Katsuki. 

That was in elementary school though, in junior high you stayed a balanced friend between the two. Stopping fights between the two boys, scolding the blonde boy every time. Yet you helped him clean up any time he picked a fight with anyone else. Wrapping up his bloody knuckles any time he needed, either from too much training or him being an asshole. You look back fondly on those times. Any time you so much as touched him, he sparked up, hands shooting out small explosions as he blushed. He felt bad obviously, but he was a preteen going through puberty and a pretty girl was touching him, what did you expect? He grimaced at every 'ow' that left your lips after he sparked up with your hand caring in his. He grew into his quirk and his control. So once the first year of high school hit, he was okay with small touches from you.

Thinking back on it, it was surprising he was okay with you, quirk-wise. He always gave Izuku hell for it, but never you. Maybe it's because you didn't have the drive to be a hero, wanting to stick to doing the sideline work of being a support tech. You weren't quirkless, but until the first year of junior high, you thought you were. Not having a flashy quirk or even a showing quirk at all. Only finding out because you've always aced every test and had an incredible academic ability. After a few too many recommendations of sped-up courses, did your parents take you to the doctor. Seeing that you did in fact have a quirk. Hyper-intelligence. You were basically a genius with an insanely good memory. It was an odd mutation of your parent's quirks. Your mom was able to remember everything she read and your dad was able to see the composition of anything he saw.

So along with Katsuki and Izuku, you strived to go to UA. Wanting to be in their support course, having strive to be a huge support tech in the future. Hopefully with your own company. You were well on that path as well.

You were there for that god-awful attack Katsuki dealt with in middle school. Seeing him covered in the sludge monster, gasping for air, haunted your dreams. You were walking with him after all. Watched the sludge climb up his body as you frantically tried to pry it off, your hands just slipping through the muck. Being pushed away once Katsuki started to cough violently. He didn't want you anywhere near what was happening. Looking wide-eyed at you before coughing for you to get help. So reluctantly, you did. Looking back at the blonde as he was submerged before you bolted for help, screaming for it down every walkway.

Only to come back to watch your other best friend running in to try and help. Screaming his name as well as you ran to get to them. Being pushed back by the wind All Might made when he came to help. Falling on your back as you watched, with tears in your eyes, Katsuki being freed from the sludge, gasping for any air he could. A hero lifted you up and held you from running to your friends, despite your frantic yelling for the boys. When they were cleared from the medics, you were allowed to see them. Instantly hugging Katsuki while yelling at Izuku over his shoulder, telling him he was stupid to run in without a quirk. Even though you were about to do the same. Katsuki rubbed off on you in that way. Yelling at others all while knowing you'd do the same.

By all means, you knew that wasn't going to be the last time you saw the boys in danger. Especially after Izuku got a quirk just in time for the UA testing. You weren't worried about the exam portion, the three of you studied together for that after all. Well, you studied with both of them, but they never studied with each other. Your test had an additional few tests but you passed them with ease. Just like how you knew Katsuki would pass his. You were worried for Izuku and his trial, which you were right to be, he broke both his arms with only one shot of his quirk. And after all that, it was still unlikely he'd get in. When you did get the letter of acceptance, you were with Katsuki, Izuku told you to go with Katsuki as he would probably not get in and he wants to be with his mom. Katsuki and you yelled and jumped around his room in excitement at the bold lettering of 'acceptance,' well you were jumping, he was being cocky and acting unaffected about it. Izuku called you only minutes after to let you know he got in as well. Katsuki rolled his eyes as he heard the news. Complaining once you hung up about how he didn't know how a nobody like him got in.

Getting into UA started everything for you. You got an insanely good internship after the sports festival. You followed Mei's lead, with Katsuki's and Izuku's advice, and showed off a suit similar to the American hero, 'Iron Man' just with your own flare and adjustments. Getting scouted for Endeavor's hero agency's personal tech crew. Following under the head of their tech.

With being in UA you got some insider information about what the hero course was doing. Making the hero outfit of both Katsuki and Izuku and doing any upgrades they needed. Eventually doing their friend's suits as well. Insider information wasn't enough, unfortunately. You were aware that the hero course went to the forest for training but you only knew Katsuki was taken when you met up with a beaten-up Izuku in a hospital bed. Having got a frantic call from Kirishima the second they got phone service. Him telling you to meet at this hospital because Izuku was in bad shape due to a villain attack.

You were involved in the rescue plan for Katsuki. Bring stealth equipment for a disguise. You weren't able to get anything else due to the time frame but you were there and it was successful. Holding your hand out alongside Kirishima for Katsuki to grab. You were also there for the fall of All Might, and consequently the fall of the boys beside you. Katsuki having his lip quiver as Izuku stood in shock.

Since you were there, and the villains saw your face and technique, you were invited to the dorms as well. They were supposed to be only for the hero course but they made changes. You dormed with the Class A girls.

You saw the boys leave that one night, deciding to stay in bed and let them hash it out. They should be grown enough at this point to not kill each other. Regretting that decision when you saw how beaten and bruised both the boys were the next day.

Their Provisional license exam was at the same time as yours. Yours being a test of how effective your gear is and if it's safe enough for the public heroes. Coming back to the dorms to see a happy Izuku and a distraught Katsuki. You spent that night in his dorm room, helping him prepare for the extra course he now had to take.

Being within the top best-performing techs within UA, you were recruited to help with the War. Making sure everyone had good and up-to-date equipment, giving extra support items, but also being within the team itself. They needed any help they could get and you had a suit good for fighting. Aizawa asked you himself. He knew his two best boys trained you enough to know how to defend yourself. So you were in the evacuation crew. Only parting from that when you saw the boys running in the direction of mass destruction.

You stood by Aizawa's side as you saw your best friends get pummeled within an inch of life. You stood there, holding Aizawa up as you watched Katsuki take three stabs in the chest for Izuku. Leaving the teacher's side instantly, running up to the limp and bloody body that was Katsuki. Hands searching his body to try and stop the blood. Bloody hands ripping his hero suit to push it into his wounds. Crying for him to stay awake. When his eyes were fluttering shut you placed your bloody hands on his face, trying to ground him as you shook his face. Bringing a hand up to slap him awake. His eyes shooting open to look at you. Iida eventually pulled you off him, helping Katsuki stand, and dragged him off the battlefield.

You had to bite your lip to hold in a yell when you saw Katsuki go back into the fight. The bloody handprints you left still on his face.

The hospital trip was a rough one as well. Waited the miserable hours for either of your best friends to wake. When one was being examined you went to the other. Constantly checking on both. Luckily, the moment Katsuki woke up, you were just coming back from grabbing a drink and some snacks.

Katsuki snapped his eyes open when he heard the door open, body jolting to sit up. You dropped your food, pushing Katsuki back into bed with a hug. He was mainly confused. He remembers the fight but he didn't expect you to be here. He wrapped his IV-ridden arm around you, hugging as tight as his ribs allowed. After all, he was extremely worried about you going into the battlefield. You didn't have nearly enough training. When he finally passed out from the pain his last worry was if you'd be alive when he woke up.

His brain was foggy, he was just getting his senses back, feeling you, smelling your hair that you must have washed the night before, and hearing the small sobs of relief you were letting out. "Stop crying, I'm fine," Katsuki rasped, voice still shattered from everything.

"You almost died," you pulled back, placing your hands on his face, getting the flashed memory of your bloody hands on him as he struggled to stay awake and alive.

He really took in your appearance then, forced to look at you with your hands squishing his face. You looked like a wreck, it was obvious to anyone that you hardly slept. Your clothes were wrinkled and your hair was a mess, as if you ran your hands through it too many times.

"Kats?" you called for his attention.

"Huh?"

"You can't do that to me," you scolded, knowing deep in your heart, something like this would happen again.

He knew that too, which is why he just pulled you in for another hug. "Why's my quirk weird?" he whispered, not feeling the usual sense of his quirk.

"What do you mean?" you asked. You tried to pull away but his grip was firm, keeping you pressed into his arms.

His face reddened. The reason he felt off was because he didn't feel the normal energy rushing through his hands that came out as sparks at your touch. "Just not sweaty, y'know, like normal."

You laughed lightly, voice still fragile from how much you've been crying, "They put you on quirk suppressants, they expected you to explode with anger or something when you woke up."

Ideas flashed before his eyes. He was on quirk suppressants and was unable to use his quirk, at least right now. He wasn't sparking up at your touch.

He left his arms loosen, you pulling back once again to check his face, make sure he really was there. Placing your hands on his cheek, squeezing your eyes shut at the memory before looking at him again. He thought over his next move, looking at your expression for a while. He reached his hand up to hold yours against his face. Looking up at you before his other hand reached up and pulled you in for a kiss.

That was the first kiss between you two. Put off as the heat of the moment and never discussed afterward. Both of you knew it wasn't, but you would die on the hill that it was. Right after you parted, a doctor came in to inform you that Izuku was starting to wake up, and he needed to run some tests on Katsuki.

After that, everything was insanely busy. Preparations for the war were already taking place. Izuku was asking for your help with his suit. The last suit he asked for before he wrote a goodbye letter and went MIA. That was hard for both you and Katsuki. You spent nights awake together going through the tracker you left on his gear, keeping track of his location and health.

Those nights together feel like a fleeting moment that you could never grasp again.

When the second year was supposed to start, you saw your childhood friend die in front of you. With nothing you could do as he laid limp on the cold ground. He was beaten and bloody just like everyone else. Just like you were. You went into the fight on a whim, just having finished a suit for yourself, and after about 20 minutes of fighting for your life, you were knocked down. Laying limp while you saw Katsuki get his lifeless body thrown to the side.

You woke up in the hospital before him, body still bruised but you were healed more than most. Katsuki's room was the first you went to, after asking every hospital worker if he was alive. His room was cold, not lively with his usual energy, but his heart was still pumping. Notes from his mom littered his table, just like yours but with more. You couldn't stand looking at him for more than twenty minutes. Choking on your tears as you decided to see Izuku.

Walking was too much for you, despite your healing, seeing Izuku's entirely broken body broke you even more. You passed out after a few moments of seeing the green-haired boy. Head flooding with the reality that both of your best friends almost died, and one did.

The nurse kept you in your room from then on, you passed out and hit your head. Gaining a major concussion with the fall. You were completely bedridden and required to be in a room with little to no light. So it was a shock when a bandaged Katsuki slammed open your door, multiple people behind him telling him to lay down and rest.

You had the horrible hospital food halfway in your mouth when he barged in. Dropping it as you stared at the boy.

"Are you okay?" he asked despite the protests behind him.

"Yes? Are you okay?" you asked back, more confused than anything.

Katsuki shoved the people off his shoulder and pushed his way into your hospital room, closing and locking the door behind him.

"What are you doing? You died! You need rest," you protested, finally having your brain start working.

He scoffed, walking to your side, with a a limp, "Can't sleep, 'think I can knowing you're in the hospital room down the hall?" He pushed you to the side of your bed, making a spot for him to lay next to you.

"When'd you wake up?" you asked softly, accepting he wouldn't have it any other way.

He stayed quiet for a moment, "Like thirty minutes ago."

"Bakugo!" you slapped his arm, super gently compared to normal, "Have you let them run their tests? How do I know you're okay?"

"Relax, and don't call me that," he huffed.

"You died!"

"I know," he sighed, looking away, "They ran a few tests and said I'm fine. Shouldn't be up but y'know how I am."

You let out a sigh of relief, "You should go to bed, Kats."

"Told ya, can't sleep," he looked at you

"Yeah but they need to-"

"I'm on quirk suppressants, can I kiss you?" he interrupted you, a blush coating his face.

"Huh?" you blinked, "What does that have to do with anything?"

"Please?"

"I mean sure but-"

He didn't let you continue anymore, pressing his lips to yours after he got your consent. This kiss was more passionate than the first. Like the other just escape death, like how it was. His hand cradled your face, pushing you closer just to kiss you softer.

When you both pulled back, you let out small breaths. Foreheads resting on each other as you stared at each others' lips.

"Been wantin' to do that," he whispered.

"Me too," you smiled. Any conversation before being forgotten, for a moment at least.

You heard the door handle to your room jiggle. Keys being tested on the lock.

"You're okay though?" he pulled back, looking at you for any injuries.

"Just a concussion, you have it worse," you frowned, looking at all the cuts that were covered with a bandage.

"I've lived through worse," he said for comfort.

"You died from this," you furrowed your brows. "Let your doctors run their test, otherwise I won't talk to you."

"But-"

"Go," you stayed firm. Just in time for the doctor to unlock the room and rush him out.

About two months or so later, you two had the chance to sit one one-on-one together. No physical therapy appointments to attend or any work to do. Just time to talk. The war left a lot of cleaning up and school only started again a week ago. Everything was changed and fixed. Which left little free time other than sleep. You've seen each other between the kiss and now but it was always in groups.

You talked for a while that day. Deciding to actually become something more. To be more than childhood best friends. So you did, about halfway into the second year.

The second year was busy, with all the changes to the hero world and the world in general. You never got time alone to work on your relationship. Staying normal besides the title change to your relationship, never even kissing again. It was hard but you worked through it, too busy to even think about it. The third year was the same, just only sharing a kiss if he got injured or when you got a huge job offer. You also shared a kiss at graduation, when you agreed to live together after school.

Getting a two-bedroom apartment together, right next to where you both worked. At first, you thought that the second bedroom was going to be an office. But it ended up being his room. The two of you not sharing a bed despite almost 2 years of a relationship at this point. Yet you worked with it, if he needed more time then that's okay. He was everything to you. And you could tell you were everything for him as well. It just got a little weird when your friends forgot your relationship, asked if you were unhappy or abused, or even flirted with you.

-Next Part-

In them m.list of this fic comment if you want to be added into a tag list <3

I'll no longer add people to the taglist if they haven't commented there. It's too much to keep up with all the new part. Hope you understand <3

[baxndaid]

rick sanchez x reader

headcannons or something idk i like old men read my stanford x readers here too x <- POLL AT THE END !!

- you’re probably a family friend, you come over every once in a while to supervise morty and summer while jerry and beth try to rekindle their failing marriage

- you do a horrible job because the kids always end up sneaking out with their grandpa to kill some god or something absurd like that

- your oblivious, rick isn’t necessarily cold towards you, just indifferent

- he would rather be elsewhere than in the living room talking to some random person that beth insists on having in her house

- one day you catch them sneaking out and probably hide inside of the trunk of ricks car(?) because curiosity killed the cat or something like that

- the cars system would probably inform him that he has an unexpected visitor and your caught red handed, now inside the passenger seat with morty and his grandfather

- awkward would not be enough to describe what that whole journey was

- rick would berate you for being so stupid, telling you that you had no survival skills getting into strangers cars like that

- morty sat in silence, disappointed that he couldn’t go to “boob world” or whatever he called it

- you see, you’re a professional glazer

- it’s not even unintentional like you’re genuinely super impressed by this guy what the fuck do you mean he’s fucked a planet?? crazy work me next

- he decides to keep you around to stroke his ego, it’s refreshing to have someone who’s not always busting his balls about morality and space laws

- and having someone as attractive as you worship him like a god sounded good to him

- after a while he’ll definitely enjoy your company but pretend he’s super cool and suave , pretending that he’s not excited to spend some time with you

- morty gets a little concerned at the fact that his grandpa has taken a liking to you, with with beth

- they know what he’s like, he’s brash and cold one minute, and a little normal the next

- they eventually give in though, they’ve never seen him so calm before, maybe you’ll change him and his chaotic ways

- (you can’t and you won’t)

- he’s super distant when he realises he might have genuine feelings for you, it’s not like him at all to feel all mushy

- truth is, he’s lonely, he’s sad, he’s afraid that things won’t work out, something bad happens to you etc, then he’s back to being lonely

- yeah he’ll probably be a little mean to you at first, to try and scare you off

- doesn’t work, so he gives up with the sass

- definitely builds you little trinkets and machines now and then

- you have no time to mow the lawn? he’s going to build self mowing grass for you (it’s a little sad)

- always stuck in traffic? he’s tinkered with your car and now whenever you drive by a traffic light it’ll always be green (so many casualties)

- too cold today? he’s going to discreetly push the sun a little closer to the earth, juuust a smidge

- he definitely butt dials you when he’s drunk only to cry on your lap until he sobers up and then pretends nothing happened, if he tells you anything particularly sensitive then your memories about it are going bye-bye

- it would take a lot for him to confess, for real

- normally though you’ll probably find a bunch of voice mails from him, he sounds rough and panicky, like he’s about to die in some stupid mission (you could always near morty crying in the background)

- he’ll tell you that he loves you, and that you make him forget about how much he hates himself

- forget about that though because in the very next voice mail he sounds normal again and is telling you to ignore what the last message said

- do not ignore it pls

- do something subtle but nice, like bake or cook him something, or buy him a new lab coat, anything

- he’ll probably get the hint soon

[katiemccabeswife]

Illicit Affairs

Alexia Putellas x Reader|| Alexia is pulling away from you and thinking back on all the memories, good and bad, you finally snap.

T Swizzle because I saw her live yesterday 🤗 I feel bad doing Ale like this and it’s my first time doing something like this so please nice 🤍

You sighed as Alexia pulled away, instantly reaching for a shirt to cover herself with. You turned away from her, not wanting her to see your crestfallen face after realising that this time was not unlike any others. Recently.

You hadn't noticed when it started happening, when Alexia seemed to detach and the possibility of the 2 of you going public seemed to vanish into thin air. You would come over and maybe watch a movie before the two of you would have sex and then she would dress herself and turn to face opposite you.

Make sure nobody sees you leave, hood over your head, keep your eyes down,

Sometimes she would remind you to make sure that no one saw you leave her apartment and to keep your hood over your head in case paparazzi or fans saw someone leaving her house and decided to take photos.

Tell your friends you're out for a run, you'll be flushed when you return,

If she didn't immediately turn away from you she would occasionally make a joke, asking you how your 'run' was. The joke stemmed from the time Mapi caught you leaving the bathrooms flushed and you had to come up with an excuse, claiming you had just finished running.

Take the road less travelled by,

Ona lived on the way to Ale's house and had noticed you driving past one too many times and questioned you about it, non-threateningly and unsuspecting of anything of course but Ale got angry at you claiming that you did it on purpose so you started travelling the back streets to and from her house to keep suspicions low.

Tell yourself you can always stop, what started in beautiful rooms,

You knew you weren't being treated the way you should be but you could stop if you wanted to, end the relationship and move on from Alexia and be happy. The only thing stopping you was hope, you used to catch her staring at you, dazed, from across the room and she used to make beautiful candle-lit dinners for every important date or milestone now, you were lucky if she offered left over takeout.

Ends with meetings in parking lots,

You wanted that Alexia back, you didn't want the one who drove you into a random car park to fuck you before driving you home.

And that's the thing about illicit affairs

If people knew Alexia was dating you people would definitely have some not-so-nice things to say. You were, what some would call, her controversially young girlfriend being 9 years younger than her which was the ‘whole’ reason your relationship was kept secret.

And clandestine meetings and longing stares, it's born from just one single glance,

Looking back on your relationship and how the two of you used to act was like looking at an entirely different couple. You used to enjoy sneaking around with Alexia, the adrenaline it used to bring you. It reminded you of when you first met her, it was your first day at Barca and Alexia took the time and effort to greet you out the front and guide you around the training centre. You knew once you saw her standing out in the cold with that stupid, awkward smile on her face that you liked her and you couldn't help it if you wanted to.

But it dies, and it dies, and it dies, a million little times,

The age gap became evident when Alexia would call you 'kid' in front of the team and your cheeks would burn red from embarrassment, knowing it was you girlfriend, who had sex with you, that was calling you ‘kid’. Every time the nickname slipped from her lips you could feel part of your relationship dying, and your heart breaking further, into a million little pieces.

Leave the perfume on the shelf, that you picked out just for him, so you leave no trace behind like you don't even exist,

You used to enjoy doing small things for Alexia, like buying a perfume you knew she would like when she burrowed her head into the crook of your neck but something that small would be insignificant and go unnoticed now. That perfume sat on your shelf staring at you teasingly, unopened, you didn't want to wear it anymore.

Take the words for what they are a dwindling, mercurial high a drug that only worked the first few hundred times

Alexia used to do the same sort of little things, buying you flowers randomly or bringing home a little treat for you every once in a while. She continued the tradition for a year before the unpredictability of the gifts that once filled you with the warmth of love started to slowly fade away every time she told you she couldn't go on a date with you or didn't want to spend time with you.

And that's the thing about illicit affairs and clandestine meetings and stolen stares, they show their truth one single time but they lie, and they lie, and they lie, a million little times

Alexia used to be the one to plan the secret meet-ups and dates, you used to be the one catching her staring at you and now she was the one standing you up and calling you out for 'acting like a child', while she would continue to fuck you like she loved you and lie to you like they were truths.

And you wanna scream 'Don't call me "kid"'

"And I fucking hate it when you call me 'kid', Alexia! I'm supposed to be your girlfriend!" You screamed at her as tears fell down your face.

"Baby-" She tried to reach out to you.

'Don't call me "baby"', look at this godforsaken mess that you made me

You took a step back and raised her pointer finger at her, "Don't fucking call me baby either," You wiped at your tears aggressively before giving up as they kept falling, "God Ale! Look at me," You sobbed, "Look at what you made me, I'm a fucking mess!" It was clear to anyone that you hadn't been sleeping or eating if someone were to walk in the room they would assume you had been punched in the eyes due to the smudged mascara surrounding your eyes.

You showed me colours you know I can't see with anyone else,

"I don't even know who you are anymore!" You could see Alexia trying to get a word in but you were filled with such sorrow it just kept flowing out of you, "You don't treat anyone in the team half as bad as you treat me and I'm your fucking girlfriend!"

"Baby-hey, we agreed that we would keep it private," She tried to reason.

'Don't call me "kid", don't call me "baby"', look at this idiotic fool that you made me, you taught me a secret language I can't speak with anyone else,

"I told you don't call me baby!" When you agreed to keep things private you thought that meant steering clear of PDA not keeping your entire existence a secret, "God, I am such a fucking idiot," You had learnt to dissect Ale's words after she started coding them, you could find the deeper meaning in 'compliments' and find the insult when no one else could, you could find hidden meanings behind sugar-coated words and it pained you that you were the only one who seemed to do so.

And you know damn well for you, I would ruin myself a million little times,

"I haven't slept, Ale," You looked back at her, "I haven't eaten, I've worked out more times than I can count, I have been ruining myself trying to be perfect for you. I'm trying to change myself just so you would like me again! And the saddest part is, is that I would do it a million times over because I love you!"

You had to pluck up the courage to leave as soon as the words slipped out of your mouth because you knew for the first time in almost a year, she had heard you when you told her you loved her, really heard you and you didn’t give her a chance to say it back.

[bau-babes]

Let Your Warm Hands Break Right Through

This entire thing is fan service and I am said fan 😝. I blame my current hyper fixation with Smallville and ovulation week. I hope y’all enjoy!

WARNING:explicit sexual content, not proof read

“So if we carry the one here and make sure to show every step of the equation we should have no problem passing this final exam!” Reader says to Clark as they finally finish their last study question.

“That was literally the longest i’ve ever studied, I don’t even know what time it is.” Clark chuckled and looked down at his watch, his face fell as he realized it was already twelve o’clock at night. “You really should get home Reader it’s already twelve.”

You look to the window to see the expected dark night sky, but what you didn’t expect was the heavy rain fall and wind blowing every which way. “Oh my god! I can’t drive in this! I gotta call my dad I don’t know how i’m gonna get home.”

“It’ll be fine Reader just use the house phone and if I need to drive you I will.” You looked over at Clark and smiled his warm, kind eyes meeting yours. Every memory of your friendship started rushing back to you in that moment, you fought off the urge to hold the eye contact reminding yourself you’ve learned to suppress these feelings long ago and turn to dial your house number. “Hey dad, Clark and I got caught up studying and lost track of time, do you want me to just drive back home or crash here for the night because of the storm? Ok, Ok yeah, alright I’ll see you tomorrow, love you, bye.” Clark studied your mannerisms as you twirled the phone wire in your fingers, feeling his cheeks flush he couldn’t help but imagine what else your fingers have good use for.

“Well, I guess you’re stuck with me for the night Clark!” He chuckled snapping out of the trance you have him in so often lately, no matter what he can’t get every little detail of you out of his head but he knows if he said anything he could ruin your entire friendship. “Oh you know I’d never mind that.” You smirk at the smallest indication of flirting Clark lets slip, dreaming of a world where Clark Kent would even give you the time of day romantically.

“So i’ll sleep on the couch?” In a moment of pure strength and/or stupidity Clark can’t help but blurt out “No! Just sleep in my bed, no big deal i’ll sleep on the floor for the night.”

Your heart skipped a beat hearing those words. Did this mean something? Of course not, he’s your best friend, and come on now he likes girls like Lana, not a girl like you with round cheeks and an even curvier body. “Are you sure Clark? I don’t want to make you sleep on the floor that’s mean!” He takes a step forward and grasps at your shoulders looking at you deeply, a sincere look in his eyes. “I promise, I have no problem with sleeping on the floor, especially if it means you’ll be comfortable.” You smiled dipping your head to the ground unable to look into the blue eyes you knew were following your every movement and reaction. “That’s very sweet Clark, thank you.” “Of course Reader, anything for you.”

Those words rang in your ears, would he do anything for me? Would he if he knew how I really felt?

You both make your way up the stairs climbing each step until you stand inside Clark’s bedroom realizing another of the many dilemmas you’ve had tonight. “Umm… Clark do you have anything I could wear to bed?” your face fell as your mind raced with insecurity, you’ve seen this scene play out so many times, a boy giving the girl he likes clothes to wear that fit her five sizes too big. But that’s not what this is, you’re not that girl for him and his clothes definitely aren’t going to fit you like they would any other girl. “Oh yeah of course hold on a second.” He rummages through his dresser and you catch a glimpse of his biceps as he works his way through each drawer. “This should work.” He holds out his hand which carries a hoodie and plaid pajama pants. You reach for the clothes scared of what the outcome will be, but all of that falls away the second you feel the heat of his hand grazing yours. “Alright turn around Clark.” “yes ma’am”

He stares at the door hearing the shuffling of clothes behind him. He can’t help but let his mind wander to what the sight behind him must be, how beautiful the curves of your body look when they’re not covered by a sweater or a pair of jeans.His mind wanders further through his imagination to what would be underneath everything you’re wearing but he quickly refocuses his attention when he hears your voice from behind him. “Ok Mr.gentleman, you can turn back around.” His eyes rake the image of you in his clothes through his mind, wishing this moment, this entire night, could last forever. “You comfy?” He mentally facepalmed as those words left his mouth Really that’s the best you could think of Clark… “Yeah! Thanks so much again these are really comfortable.” you were so happy, realizing that his tall frame and broad shoulders caused his clothes to run bigger than you would expect, conveniently engulfing your body with a slightly oversized look.

You handed Clark the blanket at the foot of his bed and a pillow and got under the covers. “Good night Clark.” “Good night Reader.” He responded back with the slight twang of want in his voice, like there’s something he wasn’t saying. You flipped the light switch off and tossed and turned for a few minutes as the wind howled and the rain pounded against the window pane. Out of nowhere you see a huge lighting strike and quickly hear the loud thunder that followed, leaving the entire farm in complete darkness. “Shoot the power must of went out from the storm, you doing ok?” Clark said from the floor where he laid next to you. You spoke with a shake in your voice suddenly feeling a chill. “Yeah i’m ok, just feeling cold that’s all.” Clark heard the chatter of your teeth and spoke again. “Yeah the heater probably blew from the storm it’s ok i’ll ask my dad to look at it in the morning.” There was a long beat of silence until you spoke again, contemplating if the comment you were about to make would be too forward. “Clark, i’m cold so you must be freezing on the floor, just come sleep in the bed with me I don’t mind.” He was shocked by your words trying to piece together his own response. “You sure?”

“Of course Clark, you said it yourself you’d do anything for me, I feel the exact same it’s really no big deal.” He stood up and you could see his broad shoulders under the tight t-shirt he was wearing to bed. Scooting over you open the blanket to him and he crawls under placing the pillow under his head and spreading the blanket he had been sleeping with on the floor over both of your bodies. “Sorry it’s a bit of a tight fit.” You said trying to break the awkward silence you had never felt with him before. “it’s just for the night don’t worry too much over it.” Clark spoke so nonchalantly you began to be solidified in the fact he could never feel the same about you. That was however until he spoke again ten minutes later.

Hearing the chattering of your teeth and the slight shake of your body he spoke up. “You know we could cuddle… if you want obviously, I just noticed you were shaking is all, no pressure.” You chuckled to yourself at the dorky Clark you knew peaking back through making all of your nerves over sharing a bed with your crush melt away. “I have to be honest i’ve never cuddled with anyone before, but if it’ll make me warm I don’t mind.” You say lying straight through your teeth, you’ve wanted this for so long your body already begins to heat with anticipation, the thought of Clark’s body pressed against yours already giving you a rush throughout your limbs. He scooted closer and closer to you as you felt your heart rate skyrocket. “Is it ok if I show you how I usually do it?” The statement made you sad knowing that he had done this with other girls before, but you pushed past the thought and spoke up. “yeah, whatever’s comfortable for you, you’re the expert here.” He laughed and opened his arms. “Scoot really close to me, I know you usually like to sleep on your side so this’ll be comfortable,do you want to be the little spoon?” Your face flushed at the comment and you thanked God that the lights had gone out long ago. “Sure…i’ll be the little spoon.” He took your body and guided it next to his placing both of you on your sides, as he did this he pulled you closer almost effortlessly and began to wrap his arm around your body. You sank into the feeling of him pressed so closely to you and became entranced by it until you felt his arm wrap around your waist and fall to your stomach, palm flat against it. “Is everything ok did I make you feel uncomfortable? I could go back to the floor if you want! I-“ “No Clark! It’s fine, I just-“ The room felt silent and Clark spoke again, this time you became hyper aware of how close he was to you, how you could hear him whisper into your ear as he spoke. “Please Reader, you can tell me anything, you know that” He was so anxious thinking he let his emotions get the best of him as he waited for your response. “It’s just-Ididn’twantyoutofeelmystomachok?” It took Clark a moment to make out what you said but his heart broke when he heard you say it. “Reader, can I tell you something?”

The room stood still, Clark’s heart started racing more than he had heard yours race before. He gathered his words knowing there was no taking this back, here goes nothing… “I- I think you’re the most beautiful person i’ve ever met and I know you don’t think about yourself that way but I do everything about you is so perfect to me and I don’t know how you can’t see it everytime I see you I just fall deeper and deeper in love with you and I don’t even know what to do with that at this point but I can’t have you lay here thinking you’re ugly because you’re the farthest thing from it.” He rambled for what felt like an hour to him, but a millisecond to you. You processed everything quickly needing more details, thinking this was some sick dream your mind conjured up. “You love me?” were the only words to fall from your lips. “Of course I do Reader, why else would I insist to study with just you, or make you sleep in my bed, or make sure to give you my favorite pair of pajamas? I’ve loved you for a very long time and I just couldn’t have you thinking I look at you with anything but admiration.”

“Clark, i’ve loved you for so long, I just don’t understand… why me? Why now?” Clark couldn’t believe what you had just said as he kept rambling in response to your questions. “You’re the most amazing person I know, you’re so kind, and smart, and loving, and everything about you from your head to your feet drives me crazy. I just- I couldn’t tell you because I was too scared, but having you here in my bed, feeling you against me, made me realize there was no better moment than right now. And don’t think I forgot what you said by the way, I think you’re the most beautiful woman i’ve ever met and I’m going to prove that to you some way, somehow.” “Oh Clark-“ You spoke but he cut you off as he bluntly said “Can I kiss you? Please-“ The heat rose through your body again stronger and more rapidly as your heart rate rose even more than before. “Yes Clark, please i’ve wanted this for so long” He cupped your cheeks and pulled you towards him, lips slack with his as you felt the warmth of him all over you, the kiss was slow and sensual tasting him and feeling as though you were breathing him in completely. “Can I show you how you make me feel?” Your mind raced as he spoke those words. “Please Clark, it’s all I want.” he couldn’t believe this was real and decided to ride this high for as long as possible. taking your hand with his he traveled it down his body, under the covers, and to the large bulge present in his pants. “Clark I-“ He wined as he spoke “Please Reader you’re all I think about, I need you. You’re so beautiful.”

“Clark- i’ve never- i’ve never done this before. I don’t know what to do-“ He was so close to you and his hand interlocked with yours, “I can show you.” all you could muster up the courage to say was “ Please Clark, I want to learn.” He guided your hand under his boxers moving it up and down his impressive length. “Just move slowly up and down.” You continued the steady motion and then asked, “Please can I take it out I wanna see it.” Clark was engulfed in pleasure as he spoke again “Of course baby, anything you want.” You moved the blanket and his cock sprung from his pajama bottoms, he moved his hand with yours guiding it up and down the shaft. His breath grew shaky and you spoke once again, riding off the high of his pleasure. “Can I- can I lick it?” His eyes widened and head reeled with excitement but he quickly took the situation into account as he spoke to you. “You don’t have to do that, I know a lot of girls think that you have to do that but you don’t, I just want you to be comfortable.” “Clark, I may not have done this before but I know what I want, please let me do this for you.” He grew more shocked and turned on and quickly said “Oh- ok yeah please, taste me baby please” You knew you wouldn’t be able to take him fully in your mouth so you decided to gently start with sucking just the tip.As you did you looked up at him for comfort and approval, you locked eyes with him and let out a chuckle sending his head backwards in an open mouthed moan. “GOD, you don’t know how long i’ve wanted this oh my lord please keep going.” You licked and sucked his cock for a few seconds more but when you decided to lick up the long vein on the under side of his cock he lost it, letting out whimpers of your name as he came in your hand. “OH MY GOD you’re incredible, please kiss me again.” You sat up and began to kiss him more feverishly, mindlessly rocking your hips against his knee, still not sitting fully out of insecurity. He pulled away from the kiss and began to kiss down your neck and he made his way to your ear moving your hair out of the way. He spoke in a deep whisper, a voice you had never heard before slipped from his lips. “come on baby ride my thigh I wanna see the way you make yourself feel good.” He saw the hesitation in your face and pulled farther away for a moment. “Clark I want to, I REALLY want to but I don’t think it’ll be comfortable for you. I’m just too heavy.” He began to get angry now, cursing every bully, magazine, or friend that ever made you feel this way about yourself. “Stop talking like that or i’m gonna have to show you just how sexy you are.”

Your mind raced thinking of the possibilities and a smirk found its way to your lips. “Clark, please show me, I want to know.” He laughed knowing the game you were playing, the witty girl he had known all these years finally peaking through her insecurity and self doubt. He flipped you over effortlessly and you yelped with shock and confusion littering your face. He kissed your lips softly and began raking in the look of your body as he did earlier in the night now finally achieving his long awaited fantasies. He kissed down your body over every part you had commented on over the years, the jaw you said was too soft, the collarbones you were sad never showed, the stomach you thought was too prominent, the legs you always complained never had a gap between eachother, until he reached your mound. He moved even slower now meeting your eyes as he took his time exploring you. “Please Clark-“ You spoke with a moan rising from the depths of your throat. “I know baby, I know just wanna take this slow with you, okay?” You nodded your head furiously waiting for the inevitable next step. He parted your lips with the tips of his fingers still locking eyes with you as he let an exploratory finger find its way inside of you. He began to move his hand back and forth feeling for the soft spongy walls within, looking at every twitch and reaction littered across your face. He then began moving his head closer and closer as you bit your lip with this new found feeling, not knowing what was to come next. He couldn’t resist anymore as he dove into you licking a stripe all the way up to your clit circling it with his tongue as you reveled in the new sensations. He continued his newfound favorite act and looked back into your eyes with mischief you were confused by this but didn’t pay it any mind as you were too engulfed in the new found pleasure.

This was until Clark hugged your legs and flipped you over until you were hovering over his mouth. “I want you to ride my face baby, don’t hold back it’s all i’ve been thinking about lately.” OH so THIS is what he meant when he said he was going to show you how sexy you are. Your mind tried to catch up with your senses but you longed for his tongue on you again. You began to sink down slowly and shyly, scared of hurting him. He began licking into your pussy again until he noticed how far away you were. “If we’re gonna do this then we’re gonna do this right. I already told you that.” He parted your legs even more than they already are and pulled you down onto his mouth by your waist. Your head fell back and any bit of insecurity fell with it. you looked down to see his eyes happier than they had ever been before and you began to unravel your inhibitions, rocking back and forth against his mouth. As you got closer he let go of you with a loud pop lifting you effortlessly as you whined wanting the sensation back again. “Go crazy baby rock into me, use me please I want you to feel good, this is all for you.” He pulled you down once again and started speeding up his movements you began to rock back even more feverishly, focusing on Clark and his eyes closed in his own pleasure you reached forward feeling the build up reach its peak with in your stomach and tangle your fingers in his messy hair, with this he lets out a long moan sending vibrations up your spine and causing the band in your stomach to snap. Catching your breath as you came down from the high you rolled off of him laying under the covers once again. You couldn’t bring yourself to say anything too wrapped up in your own little world. You found your way back to him and cuddled into his chest once again getting comfortable. With a chuckle he spoke out loud “That was one hell of a way to warm up huh?” You laughed hearing this dorky personality shining through the man who just made you fall in love with him all over again. You cleared your throat to speak, “Yeah, we might have to try something else though… I’m starting to feel a little chilly again.”

[lovelyyandereaddictionpoint]

Yandere Witch /// Part 2

Part 1

The great part about Rhiana the Witch’s cozy cottage outside that small town was the privacy. Not just when her most wriggly meals ran; but because it was purposefully hidden. The faerie circles just outside the town messed with maps and satellites making her little place a safe haven from the enemies and ex-lovers experiments she’d made over her many centuries of being alive. But now that she was leaving to get closer to you, she was uncomfortably exposed. 

“Hey Rhi-Rhi you okay? You’ve looked so nervous since I picked you up.”

“Oh I’m fine it’s just all these people make me so nervous.”

“I guess it is kind of overwhelming.”

“Maybe you can take me somewhere private. Like your place maybe?”

She thinks it’s worth the risk as she’s allowed to use the same excuse to cling to your side. Pretend to be distraught when she gets hit on to have you pretend to be dating to drive off desperate and confident weirdos. She eats that up. Unfortunately though, her open fawning over you leaves her unguarded from soul searches. An old technique lovers of olde used to unite over long periods. Naturally, trouble just happens to be in the 500-meter radius and is well off enough to get in close to foil her plans.

“Hello there. I’m your new neighbor. I wanted to introduce myself to everyone since I’m completely new to the area.”

“Oh hi, nice to meet you! I’m (Y/n) and this is Rhi–”

“(Y/n) you don’t have to introduce me I’m only visiting.”

“That’s such a shame Rhiana. I would’ve hoped we could…get to know each other better.”

Trouble is one of her craziest exes–Narciness. He was a nymph and she was a witch. Back then, it made sense that they were perfect for one another. Both were a gorgeous couple, immortal and with plenty of magic. Not to mention he didn’t even mind that she ate humans for her youthful appearance. But it just wasn’t right for Rhea. Just as his name would suggest there was a deep-seated and well-masked narcissism that showed its ugly head at the worst times. She ultimately took the very mature option that she’s learned over the centuries when it comes to major obstacles. She ran. 

“Nice to see you again Rhiana. It’s always nice to know my girlfriend decided to disappear from me the last few centuries!”

“Quit whining. I left you a note didn’t I?”

“A note cursed to explode with a memory-wipe spell the second I finished it. If I didn’t know any better I’d say you were trying to leave me.”

“Oh genius, you’re finally getting it!”

“That can’t be right! You and I…we’re perfect together! And you instead cheat on me with the most imperfect human!”

“Do not ever talk about my (Y/n) like that!”

She’s almost glad he’s crazy enough not to hide his intentions. Had he been cut from the same cloth as she-she would have kept silent until after she devoured her prey. But Narciness is an idiot who so clearly had it out for you that she wouldn’t let him live another day without singing your praises. Unfortunately, the thing about killing a nymph is that it wasn’t easy, a child of the old powers of nature. He’s survived a lot of things and can withstand some of Rhea’s most fatal potions. And especially when she’s far from home spending time with you, she’s a little shorthanded. So she’ll come up with another remedy. 

“Hey Narc, I didn’t know you went shopping here.”

“I think instead of solely getting the organic stuff I figured I’d swing by here every once in a while. The gallery is truly immaculate.”

“Good for you. C’mon (Y/n) we’re going to miss our movie.”

“Oh right! Well, it was nice seeing you, Narc!”

“Oh (Y/n) before you go, there's something I wanted to tell you.”

“What?”

“I just love your smile.”

“Oh, thanks !”

“Let’s go, (Y/n).”

The thing she found that sparked her attraction to him was his smile. It lit up the room like yours and in the end, it’ll be what protects you from his violent protections of ‘their relationship’. Unfortunately, now that she’s used a spell to shift his affection she’ll have to figure out some way to end his life before he turns violent against her. Too bad it’ll be hard to figure out in the span of two days. Now she can miss her plane and extend her stay a little while but it’s just not enough time. Not enough time for her to make sure ‘Narc’ doesn’t try anything, she’ll have to do something drastic. 

“Narciness I was hoping we could find some common ground.”

“With you? Babe, didn’t I tell you I was done? Your old news.”

“For you, I might be but I’m the hottest thing in (Y/n)’s world.”

“...I see. So we’re officially competing then. Would you like to fight this out now?”

“I’d like to try something new. A gesture of peace, if you will.”

“...oven mitts? You plan to make me bake? Why would I concern myself with such a lowly task?”

“Did I tell you (Y/n) has a sweet tooth?”

“...”

Rhea the Witch considers herself lucky her ex considered cooking for himself as a job for ‘someone uglier than him.’ She’s also glad she gets to stay another day due to food poisoning. Who knew nymphs gave witches so much nausea?

“Oh Rhea were you eating that bloody meat again? I keep telling you that rare steak is great but you got to make sure it’s at least cooked a little bit.”

“I know hon. I should really think about maintaining my diet better.”

“Yeah, I’m just glad this is happening now. Instead of on a plane or bus where I wouldn’t be there for you.”

“Yes…(Y/n) what do you think about me staying another week or so. So many things keep happening, it feels as though fate is telling me.”

She may have some serious indigestion but you were hers and the threat was…toast. For Rhea, her reward was being pampered by you. Finally able to rest with her love by her side. Nothing was better and nothing could bother her. Not even the distant thought of the new owner to the place next door. 

“I noticed your plants. I’m not a huge fan of nature but maybe you can show me the ropes. What do you say, neighbor?”

[backseatsoldier]

"Broken", Not Stupid - 8: Home?

Pairing: alpha!Simon "Ghost" Riley x unusual omega!OC (13)

CW: Omegaverse; cult-like situation; dehumanization; selling children to a cult

Author's Note: The words are flowing~ today! And a bit softer part this time lol

"13." I hear Simon call to me gently. When I feel his hand on my shoulder I open my eyes slowly. "We're here."

Groggily, having fallen asleep for the rest of the drive, I sit up and look out the car windows. It's... a house. It's not huge, but it does have a fenced in front yard. Probably the back too, by the looks of the fence seemingly wrapping around the house.

Home.

The world settles into my mind again, but it feels... foreign. Almost as if it's a lost concept to me.

"Alright?" he asks for the second time since he's picked me up.

I nod slightly and unbuckle my seatbelt. He quickly exits the car, rounding it, and opens the door for me again. Instead of taking his offered hand I get myself out of the car. My independence is important to me and I refuse to continue being taken care of tonight.

Even if he is, technically, my alpha.

My alpha!

The omega inside me squeals at the thought of having an alpha and I shake my head to clear the excitement as I follow him up the front steps.

As soon as the door opens, I get the faint smell of cinnamon and cedar - him. It should be stronger, considering this is his house, but I pay no mind to it. I'm sure the constant sterile air flow from Salvation's facilities for the past however many years has done something to my sense of smell. Couldn't smell him until we hugged. Gotta be something from Salvation.

There's plenty from Salvation I'm dragging with me, I'm sure.

Once inside, Simon seems on edge, but he gives me a quick tour. He points out the living room to the left, kitchen to the right, bedrooms and bathroom down the hall in front of us. He adds that there's a sunroom on the back side of the house, that the door at the end of the hall leads to it.

"I also have-"

Something warm and soft rubs against my ankle and I look down to see...

"-a cat. Sorry. She's not typically so social. Espeically at first."

I wave dismissively at him and lean down to let her sniff my fingers.

"Black cat seems... very you," I comment as I gently run my hand over the cat's head. She nudges up into my hand while purring.

"Her name is Selene," Simon informs me after a moment of silence. "Named her after a moon goddess because, well... she showed up on full and new moons every month for," he pauses, thinking, "about three months. I started leaving food out for her on the third visit and she became a permanent fixture in my life after that. She let herself in one day while I was on my way out," he chuckles at the memory.

"You're very beautiful. Simon must take good care of you," I coo at Selene. She meows loudly at me in response and I smile.

"She's probably cussing me out because I've been gone or busy around the house all day," he mumbles.

"Oh, you poor baby... did Dad abandon you all day?" I frown at Selene and she meows in an almost sad way while shoving her head against my wrist.

Simon takes the time I'm spending with Selene to close the door and lock it. Then he moves down the hall and opens a door to the right. While he does... whatever he's doing, I lay on the floor with Selene and she takes the chance to curl up close to my chest. From the corner of my eye I see him leave the room he'd entered and make his way back to us.

"I see you two made very fast friends." There's a hint of a smile in his voice, but he still has the surgical mask on so I'm not sure if he is smilng.

"Not gonna lie, if she stays here, I'm going to fall asleep right here," I chuckle and slowly run my hand over her back.

Selene purs louder and I smile at her.

"I wasn't allowed to have cats," I say softly. "Dogs were the only animal allowed..."

I trail off as I think back to my life before Salvation. Simpler, yet somehow still so complicated.

"Come on," Simon says to me. "I won't let you sleep on the floor. Especially in front of the door. I got a bunch of blankets and pillows out for you to choose from real quick. Tomorrow you can take your time with selections and truly make your nest yours."

The omega in my head springs to life but I move slowly, so as not to upset Selene too badly.

"Can she stay with me tonight?" I request after picking out a couple blankets and pillows. Selene is already curled up on a pillow I chose specifically for her, should she be able to stay in the room.

"I don't think either of us have a say in the matter. She's already made herself at home," he chuckles quietly and reaches out to sratch Selene's head gently.

A whine builds in my throat at the show of affection but I swallow it. Damn, I need sleep. So I climb into my first-ever nest and snuggle near Selene, slowly stroking her fur to coax both of us to sleep.

Once my eyes fall closed, I hear Simon's boots shift on the carpet and the door close but not latch.

Masterlist | CoD Masterlist | Part One

Tag List: @lucienofthelakes @lostintransist @demothers-empty-blog @scaredyspooks @tessakate @one-really-annoying-tree-rat @nerdyphantomtheorist @gazsluckyhat

[dreamlandcreations]

Chapter 1 • Faded dreams

Feyd x Atreides!Reader

Summary: You risk your life to find out what your dreams mean...

Warnings: space drugs (🙈), near death experience, mention of blood and death and war, no dialogue, no Feyd yet (well...), this is basically a prologue

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Your dreams were getting worse and it was getting more difficult to wake up each time. They seemed so real, yet they fade away each time within seconds as you finally jolt awake from the nightmares. All that remains is fear and a knowing that you are seeing the end.

You tried to ask your mother for help, well, more like tried to ask for information without telling her what's going on. Paul's own dreams were a good excuse to justify your curiosity but it also limited your options of inquiring about your specifically maddening problem. Because, of course your brother gets to dream about a pretty girl while you drown in a bloody nightmare every night. If only you could see more clearly, the not knowing of what these hazy images mean is almost worse than the death you witness each time.

You can't tell your mother though, or even Paul. They would try to stop you from making this utterly stupid decision that will probably result in your death. They wouldn't be able to understand that that possibility cannot be worse than this slowly driving you into insanity.

It was not as difficult as you thought, tricking a mentat, a doctor and a Bene Gesserit to give you little doses of spice to try. According to your careful research, with what you were gifted by Lady Fenring on her last visit, it should be enough to induce the process.

You waited until nighttime, until you knew everyone went to sleep. It was an unnecessary precaution as it turns out because Paul in the next room startled awake as soon as you took the spice.

With your last coherent thought you were thinking that getting hit by lightning must feel something like this. Only the energy didn't just hit you once, it was trapped inside your body, wreaking havoc in the very essence of your being. It was tearing you apart, and the pain was unbearable.

For a long while there was nothing but the pain, you did not really feel or sense anything. Then the first thing you were aware of was screaming, it took you a moment to realise it was your own, just before you had another wave of power rushing through you and you lost every bit of control over your body. The screaming stopped and you faintly heard your mother for a few seconds before the dreams drew you in.

No, not dreams, visions. You see everything all at once, and at first none of it made sense then you felt... time, in a way it couldn't be explained in words. The connections, the possibilities, the what ifs... like the branches of a tree... too many variants for even a mentat to handle and you were only half-trained at best. Yet, you understood, no, you felt, you sensed, you became a part of each version a little, living in a million moments at once, spread apart and yet still whole beneath that... like the branches of a tree...

The tree, your ancestry, you have to get to the other memory to finish the trial. You try to look within yourself, slightly distracted by regaining some of your physical sense and weakly trying to fight off the poison of the spice.

At the end of the spiral you see a figure, a source of all the death and misery that haunts you. A familiar, yet strange face that seemed to look into your soul. There is that rage and madness you started to see in your own reflection, only this gaze, this unnatural blue scared you more than your own demons.

Well, she is your demon in a way.

With that thought the spice floods your mind again, taking you where you wanted to go, forcing you down on the line of your ancestors, their knowledge and experience becoming a part of your consciousness but you know something is terribly wrong when your mind takes a path that no Bene Gesserit has before. You see your father and his entire line, both female and male members of your extended family tree on his part. And it comes surprisingly easy to you, too easy.

Your mother's line stops with her, there's something horrible beyond that which your mind cannot deal with and it almost shatters you.

On the inside you struggle to get out of the darkness that pulls you in. On the outside your body crashes, your heart stops, and so does your breathing.

You hear Paul's yell to the doctor to do something, followed by your mother's command, using the Voice to order you to breathe. With your last bit of strength leaving you, it feels like what you would call your soul starts to leave your body. It is quite peaceful actually, there's no more pain or worry, only a calm nothingness but unlike the previous cold and twisted darkness that came from within this feels right and you almost slip away from existence when you feel something, someone catch you and practically drag you back.

There's a voice, a command of a simple "No!" comes with the force that knocks you down and holds you in this world. The tone is unfamiliar, the raspy voice with the obvious rage laced into it sounds more like a growl than anything else and it is followed by a similarly angry, yet so much louder order, "FIGHT!"

The presence is gone as soon as it came but you are tethered to your body again, feeling how it shuts down sparks a sudden defiance in you. Not really knowing what you're doing, you will your heart's muscles to move, to pump the remaining spice through your body and your cells absorb it, sparkling to new life, then you slowly and now consciously start to sort of reboot your system with this new strange energy.

When you are done you just rest, unable to truly sleep but too tired to move too, you think. Going through the visions again and again, you start to see a pattern. As soon as you understand the reasons behind the events, it all comes together, all the previously possible paths become clear until a certain point.

Hours go by as you lie there, practically trapped in your own body but there's no fear in you anymore, you are too busy planning your next move. And the next, and the next.

You might have failed getting through the Spice Agony and it's a miracle you are alive but it doesn't matter, it wasn't an unnecessary risk after all, you know the truth now. There is only one person who's decisions changed the end game, all the others who you thought had enough power to be key persons could only influence the path, not the outcome. So you know, your mother can never set foot on Arrakis and if you have to take her place in the story, so be it.

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[bwat5-blog]

Always With You: Vi and Jinx Part 2

**Spoilers for All of Arcane**

The beginning of season two picks up with the direct aftermath of the cataclysmic event that concluded season 1. We have followed the tale of these sisters as their lives were torn apart by greed and violence. We watched as Vi threw herself headfirst at every obstacle trying to get back to Jinx, and as Jinx battled her inner demons and the manipulations of those around her. We watched them coming so close to reuniting, only for it all to fall apart.

Season two leads directly into the aftermath of that end, with Vi no longer able to deny who her sister has become, and Jinx feeling that she has finally lost everyone and everything.

Adrift:

Vi-

In the aftermath of Jinx's attack on the Piltover Council, Vi is holding on by a thread. Seven years spent dreaming of getting back to Powder, making things right, being a family again. And instead she found that her sister had become something darker, and far more dangerous...Jinx. Her every attempt at saving her had failed and to make things even worse, by convincing Caitlyn not to shoot at Jinx, that mercy had repaid by Jinx's attack, killing Caitlyn's mother.

Vi tells Caitlyn she has to go with them to apprehend her sister, but balks when Caitlyn tells her the only way is to become an Enforcer. Even with all that has happened Vi will not wear the uniform that symbolizes so much loss and pain for both she and her people. She only relents after the attack on the memorial, when is no longer any chance of peace.

Now, obviously we are focusing on the relationship between Vi and Jinx, but Vi's time as an enforcer is the driving incident in she and Jinx's next big encounter, so let’s take a moment and talk about "Enforcer Vi"

This part of her story has drawn a lot of criticism of her character, with her being called everything from a traitor, to a bootlicker and worse. I have seen people suggest she simply did it for the crush she has on Cait, who she has only known for a short time, or because she gave up on her sister. However, when we take the entire picture in account, what we find is not a woman betraying her last living family for a "schoolgirl" crush. We find a woman who defines herself by her fight for those she loves, grasping desperately at the last fleeting options left to her:

Retaliation from Piltover is coming. That is not a question, and it is not a debate. Especially after the attack on the memorial. The strike team is an alternative to a full scale invasion.

2. Caitlyn shares her fears with Vi that if she goes after Jinx alone, one of them will die. Remember what I said, Vi is trying desperately to hold on to the last few options she has left to protect those she loves. She feels both responsible for what Jinx has done, and guilty for what she became, as well as loving and wanting to protect Caitlyn. and Caitlyn is telling her one of them will die if Vi does not go. For someone like Vi who places all her self-worth in her ability to protect, there is only one choice

3. "You Don't Get To Be Selfish".. putting on the uniform of an Enforcer is a violation of Vi's very person. They took her parents from her, they were the source of fear and oppression throughout her years with Vander, and they were the source of abuse and pain in Still Water. To wear their symbol and commit violence in the streets of her childhood is a violation of everything Vi believes. So why do it? To protect Caitlyn, and because no matter the outcome, no matter what it means at the end, no matter how badly it hurts Vi, she sees this as her last way to honor her responsibility to her sister, even if she can't save her

Side Note: Before we move on to Jinx during this period, a small reminder. I and many others have touched on this a lot, but the fandom has entirely lost their minds regarding the actions of the strike team.

The use of the grey while disturbing, and a perversion of Caitlyn's families good works, is not nearly what people have made it out as. It’s not Sarin. We see many, many characters exposed to it some for lengthy periods and no one has died. As Vi explains, they used it to clear the streets to try and keep innocents out of the fighting. And as Jinx's favorite routine is to blow things up, this seems reasonable.

The Strike team goes into Zaun with 3 objectives. Dismantle shimmer, apprehend Jinx, and eliminate agents still loyal to Silco. So, in essence, catch and destroy chem barons who are still trying to control the undercity through violence and drugs, destroy an illegal highly addictive drug operation that mutates many of its users, and apprehend the woman who at this point has proven herself to be unquestionably a threat.

Jinx:

In the wake of all that has happened, Jinx is alone. Every person who has ever been close to her, has died or left. In the wake of Silco's death the barons have fallen to infighting and the undercity is in chaos. Vi is gone, again. And her attack on the council has brought the wrath of Piltover down on the undercity, prompting a call for her to be turned over to them. She has given up. During her first meeting with Isha, what does she say to the little girl she just saved?-

"you feel it.. that buzzing behind your eyes? Because you know in a moment it could all.. pow!.. best feeling in the world"

She then gestures to the wanted poster of her saying "that's me, you ever need to curse a sibling, a family or a society.. my card!"

Vi's loss is easier for us to connect to. It's not that she hasn't made mistakes, but her motivation and her intention are unclouded by the issues Jinx has. Her motivations and feelings right or wrong, are much more straightforward.

Jinx is different. Everything from her cocky theatrical attitude to her clothing is loud and dramatic ,and it all draws attention away from the absolutely crushing pain this tortured young woman is going through. Until now. No Silco, no hex-tech, no Vi.. wandering alone through the undercity with no one to perform for.. And what has she told us? She is ready to die, and she has cursed everyone and everything in her life.

When Sevika asks her plan, she responds "Let it all burn"..

This only changes when the strike team comes for her. We see the heart wrenching reaction realizing that it's Vi wearing the uniform, storming their old hideout from when they were kids. Now, when Vi and Jinx see each other again, Jinx attacks her verbally over this. Lashing out from a "moral highroad".. But I think what is really happening here is that Jinx feels her sister would only have put on that uniform if she had truly driven Vi away forever. In her mind, she has officially lost the last person who there was a chance could love her. Running out into the street coughing and gasping, she is attacked by Smeech and subsequently saved by Sevika. We are given two important character points here I want to touch on:

"Everyone who gets close to me dies"- like the words Vi eventually says "I choose wrong every time" this is Jinx's negative core belief. If we think back to the beginning of their story, with Mylo teasing her and calling her a Jinx, she has truly come to believe she is exactly that, bringing death and misfortune on anyone who gets too close. From her childhood until now, we need to inventory what has occurred to reach the point that she has truly come to believe she is a curse on everyone who knows her:

Loss of her birth parents

Loss of Mylo, Claggor and Vander all of whom she blames herself for

Loss of Vi: This is obviously complex, Vi hitting and yelling at her but then her thinking Vi was dead. Lot of conflicting emotion

Killed Silco: Of course, the truth of her relationship with Silco was extremely toxic but she still loved him as a father

Feeling of total rejection by Vi

2. "It was something I could fix"- Jinx quietly took this on herself to try and make something right by replacing Sevika's arm. It's a small thing and blown by fairly quickly given all the other stuff going on at this point. But it's a small nod to the fact that Jinx is not totally lost.. there is still someone in there who considers the cost of her actions and wants to make things right.

Ultimately, due her heartbreak and rage and her total and complete loss of her family, she declares her plan to finish what's left of her family.

Battle of The Ventilation Chamber:

Vi- In an emotional moment before it all goes wrong, Vi has a conversation in which she states "My sister, is gone. There's only Jinx now, it has to end." it should be noted that this is not a "bad-ass" revenge mission. This isn’t the heroic final confrontation and the show doesn't treat it as one. While Caitlyn has been growing darker, and more violent as their work has gone on, Vi has watched as the last person she had left she has left loses herself more and more. Vi is emotional, and she is frightened of what she may have to do and what's happening to Caitlyn. But she has reached the point where she doesn't feel she has a choice.

I recently had a discussion with another user in which they questioned how Vi could ever reach a point that she was ready to kill Jinx. I have thrown lists at you all throughout this post and part 1 so I'll spare you. But what it boils down to is this. Vi cannot reconcile that her sister, and Jinx are the same person. At this point in the story, she cannot look at Jinx and see Powder after a lifetime of trauma and guilt and inner pain. As she tells Jinx before the fight kicks off “.. done pretending you’re my sister you’re not. You killed her. I’m not gonna let you stain her memory anymore”. Now of course at the heart of it, Vi is wrong. That is still her sister... But as I have touched on repeatedly in this two part deep-dive, Vi doesn’t see what we get to see.

Take the bridge attack from season 1:

What does Vi see- After running onto the smoking bridge, covered in wounded and dead enforcers from Jinx’s attack, Vi goes to Caitlyn and in relief she is okay and starts to help her up. As she is doing so, the little sister she fought so hard to come back to materializes out of the darkness and opens fire, nearly killing them both

What we got to see- Jinx trying to silence Mylo’s hallucination and reassure herself that Vi was saying goodbye to Caitlyn and won’t leave her again. We see that she only attacks the bridge when she realizes the stone is there. The same stone that is the symbol of Silco’s acceptance, and remembering her deep fear of being alone or abandoned if she is deemed weak or not useful, we understand she has no choice but to get the stone back. At this point we have already seen her hallucinations when she sees Caitlyn’s face, and we know that Silco and Sevika have intentionally used Caitlyn’s presence to drive a wedge between Vi and Jinx (with Sevika intentionally doing it to destabilize Jinx’s mental health). And we see the look on Jinx’s face after her fight with Ekko... she almost killed her sister, and she and her childhood best friend almost killed one another... before she pulls the pin...

As stated, my purpose here is not “Team Vi” VS “Team Jinx”. That’s not the point of this story at all. So while it’s true that Vi’s inability to see her sister in Jinx has pushed Jinx further into the dark, and that Jinx’s inability to quell that darkness in her has made her a monster in Vi’s eyes, ultimately what it comes down to is seeing these sisters who once were so close, pushed to the breaking point by a world that never gave them a chance.

We come now to the tragic but inevitable violent clash between the sisters. They are in a massive chamber with pillars Jinx has painted with scenes of their childhood. As is her way, they all seem to portray Vi in a more sinister way, and when Vi sees them, she tells Caitlyn "take the shot". This is the first time we hear Vi call her Jinx to which she responds, "Finally got the name right". They verbally snipe at each-other, and finally the fight starts after Caitlyn takes the shot.

This whole scene is aesthetically breathtaking between the music and the animation and garnered a lot of praise as it deserved. But in the story, this moment is heartbreaking. For everything that's happened, this is the first time we see Vi and Jinx truly trying to harm one another. I have seen a lot of commentary regarding a moment where they were "sister fighting" suggesting how unserious they were. And while it is very true that as the fight goes on, we see the horror of what they are doing to one another start to register, Jinx opens the fight full blast with her Gatling gun which Vi shortly rips in half. They are not playing. But as the fight continues, we do start to see that realization dawning on them of how far this has gone.

Jinx looking up at Vi after Vi rips her gun in two:

2. Vi catching Jinx when she is about to fall dangerously far, note how she is holding her for the briefest moment

3. Vi's face when she hears her little sister say she is ready to die, and that she's glad it's VI

Eventually it comes to a head when Caitlyn shoots one of Jinx's fingers off and Vi pins Jinx by the neck to a stone altar. Jinx reaffirms what she has already told us "Go on. I'm ready... I'm glad it's you... it had to be you..." as she goes from angry and struggling to letting her eyes close. The rage leaves Vi's face and transitions into a heartbroken shock as her hand falters. Grief and anger play out on her face before seeming to work herself back up to finishing it, until Isha jumps in the middle and stops everything by pointing a gun in Vi's face. Ultimately because of how it plays out, we will never know if Vi would have done it. I see it as equally likely she was going to scream and smash her hand down on the side, as we saw her starting to see Powder in Jinx’s face during that moment.

Of note, the second that gun is in Vi's face Jinx looks scared and shouts "NO!"

After Caitlyn shoots Isha's gun from her hand Vi looks down at this child protecting Jinx in shock and confusion... you recall I mentioned Vi had not seen a moment of good in her sister since she came home.. seeing this vulnerable little girl risking her life to protect her I think made Vi question everything right then in that moment. We then see the way Jinx is looking at Vi.. who protected them... Like for the first time in a long time, both are seeing who they used to know.

Turning Their Backs on the world:

I have had trouble finding a straight answer on exactly how long passes between the end of Act 1 and the beginning of Act 2, but most seem to agree its anywhere from 6 months to a year. And in that time the sisters have fallen into very different lives.

Vi:

For the first time, we are seeing Vi in total freefall. She has always had a reason, always had a purpose. When she was a teenager, she lived to protect Powder and the others, and make a better life for them. When she was in prison, she lived to see Powder again and make things right. And when she couldn't save Jinx and joined the strike team, she lived to protect Caitlyn and end Jinx's threat. But she couldn't save her sister, and Caitlyn betrayed her. Everything Vi believes in, every core tenant, every lesson she has tried to honor have all been shattered. And for all the blood, and bruises, and broken promises, she has nothing, and no one. And we see her self-destructing. She seems strong at first, winning fights and looking immensely strong, but that quickly devolves until she is curled up alone, dreaming that the first hope she'd known in seven years still loved her.

Jinx:

Jinx in the meantime has been living quietly with Isha in her hideout and found a measure of peace. We learn she has not been seen in public in months, but between her attack on Piltover's council, and their attempts at demonizing her to have the undercity cooperate, she has become a symbol to the citizens of Zaun, although she wants nothing to do with it. We see a much gentler side to her, playing with Isha, dying her hair. and we have a revealing conversation here that shows us she is more at peace than before.

Jinx shares that her name used to be Powder, when she was a kid.. and that being with Isha is reminding her of Powder. And even more telling, she declares "Jinx is dead!"

-- In a way, the sisters are going through similar journeys at this time in their lives, Jinx is just at a different stage. While Vi has lost everything and is struggling to find the will to keep living, Jinx has come out the other side of that... learning to be someone new with Isha by her side. Although I think we were cheated out of a conversation where it was mentioned, it does seem clear to me that through taking responsibility for the younger girl, Jinx starts to understand Vi more than she ever did.

We see when Sevika returns to try and force Jinx into attending the rally, Jinx has a moment where the glitches return, but she stops it saying Silco shouldn't have died if he wanted her to be his symbol. She goes to see Silco's chair, speaking like he was there, saying she knows she probably owes him the revolutionary role but is afraid to mess up she and isha's peace, and mourns his loss

Jinx does not owe Silco anything... But even with progress she has begun to make her guilt over what happened lingers. However, what is important to recognize is this. During all of season 1, the influence and manipulation of Silco and Sevika kept Jinx from reuniting with Vi, from finding the peace she so clearly needed. Now that Silco is gone, she resisted. She even says at one point that her head is much quieter since Silco died.

Finally, Jinx is forced back into the world, when Isha is taken at the rally. When Sevika tells her, we see a glimpse of that darkness in her, hearing the specters and seeing Silco. Until it ends and she and Sevika set off.

There of course two big moments for her character on the mission:

While at the prison for Isha, (which lets be clear, she went for Isha), she releases the others taken in the rally. They begin to gently touch her shoulder in thanks, and in the beginning, she appears nervous, like a trapped animal. Until she realizes they meant no harm, and the music shifts as her eyes soften. And what is the music giving us? "Dear friend across the river".

Her reunion with Vander- Not a lot to say in terms of character at this moment, but it literally impacts the rest of the story.

For Vander:

The Sisters are reunited when Jinx comes to Vi, both much changed. Vi is understandably extremely aggressive with Jinx, especially when Jinx brings up Vander. But the changes in Jinx seem to register with Vi, enough to let her guard down, at least enough to hear what Jinx has to say.

Jinx in general just seems calmer and even tempered, trying to nervously joke with Vi

Does not try to fight back when Vi grabs her

starts crying while Vi is choking her

We must remember that the last time Vi saw her little sister they quite literally tried to kill one another. These small changes, perhaps coupled with an unspoken joy to have her sister back, and Vi follows. As they travel, there are several key points we want to discuss:

Seeing the painting: There is a moment where Vi sees the painting in the undercity, depicting Jinx in a heroic pose with Vander behind her, and no sign of Vi on the image. Vi looks almost indignant while Jinx gives a cocky smirk. It's not mentioned again, but my assumption would be that Vi is looking at, seeing herself left off, and her feelings are hurt. Jinx helped flood the lanes with shimmer, helped Silo who of course killed Vander, and Vi is forgotten. Although hardly fair, I think is a part of Vi realizing the potential of who Jinx can be. No matter what the past was, her sister seems to have become someone other than a creature of the dark for their people.. “maybe we can rewrite your story.. like you did with Zaun”. 

The Sisters Bicker. They go back and forth insulting each other’s weaponry, mental state that sort of thing. Jinx throws the enforcer thing in Vi's face again and they bicker-fight leading to Isha getting smacked after getting in the middle of it again. I think the key take away here is they were able to fight and it is SO MUCH different than before. They weren't trying to kill one another.

Vi sees Jinx tending to Isha. Vi watches as Jinx tends to Isha, comforting and checking on her, and she seems almost angry, but I believe she is more conflicted… Vi is seeing the actual person in Jinx. Not the persona but the young woman underneath, and slowly it’s these changes that make her start to see her sister is still in there… (For all the “Vi is seeing how she should have treated Powder” people, go back and watch every scene of Season 1 Act 1 with them in it other than the single time Vi hurt her, in the literal worst moment of their lives since their parents were killed. No. Just No)

Jinx tells Vi the last time they tried to help Vander alone it all went wrong. Maybe this can be a do-over for them. Seeing this hope in Jinx is huge. She has spent so much time believing all she does is hurt her loved ones, and for the first time we are seeing hope in her. A hope that things can be different. And she brought Vi into that hope with her.

The mining shack. With Vander's letter revealing how things could have gone, we see a bittersweet moment in which Vi tries to bring herself to comfort Jinx but isn't there quite yet.

Vander arrives: Purely story wise these events are all massively impactful. But to speak on Vi and Jinx's relationship. They have not really been at peace since Vi left prison. There has been anger, loss, bitterness and so much grief. But as soon as Vi sees Vander charging, she throws her body in front of Isha without hesitation. She says "He's gonna kill you" not us, not me, you. Vi holds back Vander while Jinx frantically tries to figure out how to help, until the moment comes. Vi is faced with a choice:

Trust Jinx, and potentially die, or don't and potentially kill Vander

Vi drops her gloves...

"I choose wrong every time, and because of it, I've lost everyone"..

"Everyone who gets close to me dies"

In the small glow of Jinx's lighter and the green of Vander’s back, both of these poor women's worst beliefs are wrong... Vi let the heart of hers Vander believed in lead her, she trusted her sister, and now Jinx finds her family alive and embracing one another. Changed. Hurt. But alive and demanding that she join them in a loving embrace. This moment COULD NOT mean more for Jinx and the animation is just gut wrenching. She is so terrified that she has cost one or both of her family their lives in the dark… and then she sees it. They are okay. And they love her.

The Commune:

This nauseatingly brief time as a family all takes place in Viktor’s commune, where they have come to find healing for Vander. It all takes place in a single episode, but what we are seeing is the continuing healing of Vi and Jinx, away from the influence of what drove them apart in the first place. The conflict between Piltover and Zaun. The ongoing oppression of Zaun and deep history of the classist system that has caused so much turmoil is far, far too vast a topic to bring into this in detail. So, I’ll say this. We first met these characters in a clash between the two cities in which they lost their parents. And ever since then, they have not had a moment free of some aspect of that conflict driving them apart, until now. And it is in that quiet that they start to make peace:

Jinx trusts Vi enough to give up her guns when they enter

Vi wants Jinx’s opinion regarding if they should stay to help Vander

Vi wants them all to stay and be a family

(Pointed out by another user and god I love this point)- When Jinx is telling her joke to Isha, she doesn’t identify Vi as an enforcer. She calls her a sentimental ex con..

Vi trusts Jinx with the plan to save Vander even over telling Caitlyn about Jinx’s involvement

Jinx saves Caitlyn’s life: I mean… I don’t really think there is way to overstate the significance of this.

Of course, because of the arrival of outside influences over which the sisters have no control, all falls to death and destruction. They lose Vander again… and Isha. And we see them for the last time this act as Vi, who at the end of Act 1 almost killed her sister, throws her body over Jinx shielding her from the blast.

To see them have their family back only to have it be ripped away so quickly… I think we all had the same reaction. It’s extremely difficult to watch Jinx hugging Vander while Vi treats us to a rare genuine smile of relief, only for it all to fall away so quickly. It wasn’t what we wanted. But I believe that through the bond they share Jinx and Vi are made stronger through their brief time in this place, ultimately closing in on the path to becoming who they are meant to be.

Back in Piltover:

Act 3 begins with the final fight mere days away after they have all returned to Piltover in the wake of the Communes destruction. I have had trouble finding an exact time frame for how long it’s been but the very least I would venture it has been close to a week. Whatever Vi’s exact injury was she has been unconscious the entire time, healing in Caitlyn’s bed. Her hair seems longer and most of the black has been cleaned away. Jinx on the other hand, has deteriorated. Her hair is unbound, she will not eat, and she is picking at her skin in the dark of the bunker cell while Caitlyn waits for Vi to wake up.

We are given a scene with each of the sisters apart from each other first that are significant here, followed by their reunion:

Vi-

First and foremost, when Vi wakes up and asks where the others are yes she asks for Caitlyn first (aww) but then when she asks about her sister, she asks for Jinx. Not Powder. She isn’t using the name in anger, or fear, but out of concern. We watched over the course of act 2 as Vi was able to start seeing the person underneath the “character” of Jinx, start seeing the truth that she still has a sister. It’s a quick moment but one noteworthy in terms of her acceptance of who her sister has become.

This only continues during her confrontation with Caitlyn. Upon learning Jinx is in jail Vi comes to her defense and she and Caitlyn talk things out to a point. The primary meaning in this moment is between Vi and Caitlyn, but in Vi’s spirited defense of her sister we see a few clear points all lending itself to her learning and believing that Jinx has changed, all concluding in the question she leaves hanging in the air “Who decides who gets a second chance”

Jinx-

We find Jinx in a terribly dark state. She is damaging her skin, she won’t eat, her hair is bedraggled and unkempt. As some users have pointed out the thick string of her shirt has been removed suggesting either an attempt at self-harm or at the very least concern over it. Having come so close to a happy family again, to having some sense of regaining what she blamed herself all her life for destroying, only to have it all destroyed again seems to have driven Jinx into an empty darkness we have not seen her in.

Now, we have seen her lost and having given up before. In the wake of Silco’s death and her attack on the council she wandered the undercity lost and without purpose seemingly hoping to die. But this is different, it is quieter. It is the hollow emptiness of grief, not the chaotic fury of self-loathing. And the difference matters. The tragedy of Isha’s death is a wave that almost swallows Jinx completely as we will come to see, but in that loss, she has also been severed from Silco’s shadow and by extension the “symbol of Jinx”. All that’s left is the person, and we watch as she and those who love her help that person wake up and swim to the surface. Before she and Vi see each other again she has two important conversations in this cell:

Caitlyn comes to feed her. This is a rather short exchange for these two women whose lives have impacted each other so much yet spoken so little, but its incredibly important. After being confronted by Vi, being forced to question who deserves a second chance, Caitlyn demands Jinx try to account for her actions. Caitlyn also in this moment gives away the fact that she sees the common ground between them, realizing they have both done terrible things. And we have the moment Jinx in her way, apologizes to Caitlyn. She admits it would not have made a difference, but she didn’t know her mother was there. Now I have seen some conversation regarding this, suggesting that Jinx is saying she would have done it anyway because she didn’t care. That is clearly incorrect. Jinx is looking back and realizing that at that moment, she was lost. She isn’t the same person anymore, but she is able to see now how lost she truly was.

She is finally visited by “Silco” in this moment and this “conversation” marks the turning point for Jinx’s character. All of the dialogue from this entire moment is amazing but what it boils down to, is Jinx realizing the only way forward is to break the cycle. Silco speaks on the prisons we create for ourselves out of the identities we cling to, the “symbol of jinx”… at that the only way the killing stops, is to walk way. To end the prison of who she thinks she is supposed to be and end the cycle

Never Giving Up:

Vi comes rushing to Jinx’s cell once again calling her sister Jinx, accepting who she is. She has taken the keys and intends to free Jinx, with hopes of helping her rewrite her story like she did in Zaun. Jinx only responds in a muted fashion but Vi rushed into the cell and embraces Jinx tightly crying. Jinx’s eyes soften for a moment before she says softly “Your never gonna give up on me… are you” before striking Vi in the stomach and locking her in the cell. As Vi tries to stop her and Jinx vanishes slowly into the dark, Jinx tells her “You don’t have to worry about me anymore… you don’t have to be feel guilty about being happy. You deserve to be with her… there’s no good version of me… break the cycle…” leaving Vi screaming in the cell.

Vi-

This is obviously a very heavy and bleak moment between the sisters. With everything they have been through, Vi has fully come to love, accept and trust her sister again. And this reversal of her attempt to rescue her is jarring and extremely upsetting. As she tells Caitlyn later, she truly believed Jinx would help them. Would stay. And here’s the thing that we as the audience know but Vi doesn’t. Vi was right. She was right to believe in her sister, right to see Jinx’s potential and not stop loving her. But was the lesson that is so hard for Vi to learn that this all leads up to, is that you can’t save someone who isn’t ready to be saved. Vi loves Jinx with all that she has, but Jinx isn’t a place mentally and emotionally to process and receive that love quite yet.  So yes, Vi could have somehow hulked out of the cell and chased Jinx down somewhere. But it wouldn’t have mattered.

I had a conversation with another user a few posts back who asked for my thoughts on this moment. I don’t know if any of you have ever loved an addict in any way, romantic partner, sibling, parent what have you. But you can’t make them get better. You can scream at them, hit them, hug them, hold them down and beg them and all in all at the end of the day until they are able to turn that corner in their mind it won’t matter. Not because they don’t love you, but because they have to start loving themselves enough to see the hope you have for them themselves.

Jinx-

I saw a recent quote from one of the showrunners, saying they focus on characters who do the right things, for the wrong reasons, to make them so compelling. This is a classic example. As we will come to learn, everything that Jinx’s mind projected as Silco in that moment, was correct. The only way for any of them to find peace is to walk away. To break this never-ending cycle. We know what she is going to do, and thankfully that she is stopped, but another major factor here is what she says to Vi. I have seen this conversation twisted into every possible way- “oh she is clearly pushing Vi away and clearly going to hurt herself, Vi should have gnawed her way out of the cell like a badgermole and swooped Jinx up while Piltover burned! “(or some other insane nonsense). But those people are missing perhaps one of the most loving moments between the sisters since they became adults.

Jinx is not pushing Vi away. She is trying desperately to give Vi the permission she knows Vi can’t give herself to be happy. Yes, in this moment by “breaking the cycle” Jinx is intending to end her own life. But she is also freeing Vi of the cycle of guilt that has tortured Vi since they were children. As horrific as it all was, I think losing Isha, feeling that guilt for that younger girl she loved and tried so hard to protect, gave Jinx an understanding of Vi and the pain she has carried all these years. And in what she planned to be her final words to Vi, begged Vi to accept the happiness and love Jinx knows she deserves.

Never too late to build something new:

In the brief time between their conversation and the final battle, the sisters are once again separated for a time. The aftermath of what in that moment felt like it could be the last time they saw eachother still heavy on them both. We sit with each of them, seeing the moment they are each faced with a choice, break the cycle, or let it end:

Vi-

Caitlyn finds an understandably extremely upset Vi in Jinx’s cell, knuckles raw and bleeding. Vi emotionally admits to freeing Jinx, lamenting that she truly thought Jinx would help them and finally giving voice to her negative core belief – “I choose wrong everytime, and because of it… I’ve lost everyone”.  Vi is a warrior. She has been since the beginning of the show and that has remained a core character trait. But it’s not her ability to do violence that makes her who she is, it’s her heart. It’s her unending belief in those she loves and their potential. But, the hardship and pain she has gone through have robbed her of seeing those same things in herself, that she fights so hard to protect for others. And it is in the aftermath of her sister’s departure, and the realization that Caitlyn not only is still there for Vi, but has laid down her hatred knowing that Vi was going to do this and giving her the chance to, that Vi has a choice:

Continue the cycle, ignore her love for this woman and caitlyn’s love for her and hunt down Jinx, knowing that they all may die tomorrow- “When people look up to you, you don’t get to be selfish”

OR

Accept that she cannot save Jinx if Jinx isn’t ready to be saved, and fall into the arms of the woman she loves for the first time choosing herself, and her happiness- “you don’t have to be feel guilty about being happy. You deserve to be with her”

And because of Jinx, for the first time since we have seen her, Vi chooses happiness and love for herself, rather than continuing to try and bare the pain of those she loves.

Jinx-

*Disclaimer*: I’m going to be honest with you all, I think this is one of the moments they really undercut with the rushed pacing of season 2. I understand through implication and context what the missing pieces were. But Jinx deserved more time for us to see how Ekko brought her around, and how she rallies the undercity. Also I know this GIF is not this moment but I couldn't find what i wanted and i think it has the right feel for them

We find Jinx destroying the remnants of who she has been. Burning the Last Drop, cutting her hair, the haunting lyrics of please let me go behind her we are watching as she is dismantling the prison of who she is piece by piece. All culminating in her standing on the rooftop, setting off the monkey bomb before Ekko stops her and eventually talks her down enough (after a series of attempted suicides) for him to tell her, “it’s never to late to build something new”.

Now this all connects to Ekko’s AU adventure, and we aren’t getting into that here, because that Powder is not our powder. But the importance is that Ekko had previously given up on Jinx. Even in the face of Vi’s insistence that she could be saved, Ekko denies her again and again. But during the fight on the bridge in season 1, we see that moment of tenderness between them. And then in the AU, Ekko has come to believe in the possibilities of the future again, in the possibility of Jinx’s future.

The Final Battle:

The battle spreads all across the city and there is a lot that could be discussed. But keeping to our sisters, first we need to talk about Vi. All throughout this post and the one before it, I have tried to convey my belief that Vi has been finding the value in herself other than her ability to harm. She has been on a journey that has changed her tremendously in many ways, not the least of which being she has gone from that angry young teenager who didn’t view herself as someone worth of being protected, but was prepared to fight and bleed to protect others, to someone who was able to choose happiness, to see the value in a part of herself not meant to take a blow. All of that to say, it is interesting that the character who has been known for her fighting the entire show, appears the first time in the war not throwing punches with the enemy, but carrying a wounded person out of the firing line as buildings collapse.  Her first action in the biggest conflict of the entire show, is to save a life.

We do also have the moment where she sees Gert’s blue hair and is clearly afraid it may be Jinx before the helmet comes all the way off

Jinx’s Arrival-

Things are dire. Vi and her forces are being overrun by the Noxian shimmer-hulks, Caitlyn and Mel are facing Ambessa while their enforcers are on their knees, when Jinx rides in on a war balloon (apparently what her hideout has been this entire time) leading the firelights and the undercity to war. This is a fantastic moment for many reasons but in keeping with our purpose here I want to discuss a few things:

Validation of Vi’s belief- When Vi freed her from the cell, Vi had fully come to trust Jinx again, seeing the woman her sister had become, and not as some stranger. And when Jinx left Vi was devastated. But in this moment Vi’s belief and faith in her sister are proven correct, for both of them

Jinx’s Balloon bears tributes to her loved ones: Vi’s bunny rabbit that she gave Jinx before trying to turn herself in, small dolls for both Mylo and Claggor, and Isha’s bunny ears.

Because we essentially jump from Ekko barely managing to talk her out of committing suicide to her arrival here, unfortunately there is some speculation required as to how exactly that transition went down. I see this as Jinx finally beginning to step into who she is meant to be. Not the shattered ghost of Powder, and not Silco’s terrorist daughter. Her own person. She wears Jinx’s colors and comes in blasting music and colorful smoke, but her whole demeanor is much more calm and under control. That cocky smirk when Ambessa sees her somehow reminiscent of when we first saw her giving Sevika the same look in season 1, but Jinx feel so much more grounded and adult. Ultimately after a series of coming to each other’s rescue, it all results in the two sisters, back to back, standing in the wreckage of the hex-gate preparing to do battle with what used to Vander. Before the fight starts, Vi sprints to Jinx and lifts the rubble off of her saying “I guess you shouldn’t have come back” and Jinx says “Still don’t get it, huh sis? I’m always with you, even when we’re worlds apart”

Jinx’s Sacrifice/The End:

The rest of the fight goes in with the degree of epic insanity we have come to expect in this show but ultimately it all ends, with two sisters, and their father. When Viktor and Jayce vanish Jinx, Vi and “Vander” come crashing down in the rubble. Jinx lands higher up and looks down over Vi and “Vander” calling for Vi to move before it all breaks apart.

Okay, I have covered this moment in a variety of posts, so for those keeping up with my blathering, I apologize. But A- people continue to completely miss the point here, and B- this is actually quite relevant for what occurs next. So when we see Vi, tearfully standing over “Vander” and kneeling down to cup his head in her hands, ignoring Jinx’s calls to move, we need to remember some things. Here is a quick and dirty list of the trauma Vi has survive up until now:

According to Arcane Wiki Vi was 9 when she saw their birth parents killed

At roughly 15 years old she sees her adoptive brothers violently killed in explosion

Sees a shimmer mutated Vander die under her after saving her life

Survives seven years in an abusive, violent prison after being locked up without cause starting in her teens

Is wounded countless times over the events of the show at least twice in ways that could have killed her

Almost killed by little sister multiple times before they make peace

Almost kills little sister

Compromises her principles regarding wearing the Enforcer uniform only to be completely abandoned and betrayed

Gets Vander back in severely mutated form

Loses Vander again in truly traumatic fashion

Loses Isha who she had begun to bond with

Severely wounded saving Jinx

Entire battle up until now including seeing Loris die in front of her

Vi is twenty-three at the end of the show. Twenty. Three. She is so young to have suffered so much. And it is quite clear as she starts crying, standing over “Vander” and dropping to her knees, that she has just had enough. We literally see her flashing back to the first time she lost him and it truly seems like she is not even hearing Jinx. When “Vander” attacks, for the first time in the entire show, we don’t see Vi fight back. She crawls back crying and even calls out “Vander!” for him to stop. Until Jinx launches into him, sending them both over the railing.

Vi tries to save her sister, but Jinx seeing that they are all going to be pulled down, repeats her vow to Vi “always with you sis” before knocking the hex stone out of Vi’s remaining gauntlet sending Jinx plummeting down with “Vander” leaving Vi screaming in grief above. We watch as Jinx smiles, a peaceful expression on her face and the animation of her features shifts back to resembling Powder more, and finally as we see a flashback of Vander with the girls when we were little, the bomb detonates.

The End:

Vi-

For so much of this story, Vi was driven by guilt over the horrors of their youth. A life of standing in the breach for others, and no belief in the value of what else she had to offer the world, had left her unable to believe that she deserved to be happy. When she was released from prison, nothing was as she found it, including the sister she came back to save. And although the journey was far from simple, getting to know Jinx as her sister, seeing those parts of her she thought lost, having that all too brief time back together with Vander, and even seeing her sister leading their people in defense of humanity itself, all helped Vi heal from the loss of Powder, because Jinx is her sister now. And Jinx gave Vi something no one else could have. Permission to be loved, and to feel safe. I love Caitlyn and Vi's love story. Truly, I do. I consider their relationship immensely important to the story and plan to give it the same treatment as I have here. But if Jinx had not begged Vi to finally allow herself to know peace, I don't know that she and Caitlyn would have found each other again. And it is because of that happiness, that I believe Vi will find her way through the loss of her sister. Because she isn't alone. She is supported, and she is loved, and she is safe. And rather than seeing Jinx's fate as her failing her little sister, I hope that eventually Vi will see it for what it was. Jinx saw her older sister in need, and became the shield Vi had always tried to be for her, the shield Vi never believed she herself deserved...

Jinx-

Jinx's arc is not finished. I love Vi, and I sincerely hope to see her character again someday, throughout all of her trials and tribulations we watched as she found who she is supposed to be, and found a way to know peace. Jinx has found who she is... I think... but she knew there was no way she could ever find that peace in Piltover or Zaun. There would always be turmoil for her, and by extension for Vi. And Jinx knows Vi could never know peace, knowing she was out in the world all alone... its a hard sacrifice. But it leaves the door open that one day, maybe they can be sisters in the untroubled lives the world stole from them when they were young. it's hard to say exactly what would have become of Jinx had Vi never come back. My thought, is that she would be dead, or something so dark that it would be better if she were... I do not discount that Silco loved her as a daughter in the best way he knew how, but we were watching the erosion of her mind and soul and until Vi arrived, no one challenged it. No one seemed to care. Vi's stubborn, bullheaded unyielding belief in Jinx helped her see that she was not "A Jinx", she was simply Jinx. As I said, the road was clearly far from simple. But at the end of the day, as she reconnected with Vi, and as she came to understand Vi through her relationship with Isha, Jinx overcame those howling demons inside of her, and put to rest her negative core belief:

"Its ALWAYS me.. everyone who gets close to me dies"

With what may have been her last act among the living, Jinx made sure that the person in her life who tried so hard to stand by her side, made it out alive.

If I may, I would call your attention back to the very beginning of these sisters journey together:

There in the wake of the first tragedy, after seeing young Vi standing tall in the horror, holding Powder's hand and trying to shield from from the death all around them, Vi eventually can't take anymore. And what does Powder do when Vi needs her?... becomes her fucking shield. (I'm not crying.. your crying)

It's hard to know what to say after such a devastating and beautiful story... I like most people believe that Jinx is alive, and the evidence is strong to support that. But it doesn't take away from the immense loss these sisters have been through. Unless we are to assume the Caitlyn has shared her suspicions with Vi, Vi believes Jinx is dead. And given everything we know of her character, the painful truth is that Vi will likely carry that guilt in some way for the rest of her days. And after watching them fight so hard to come back to each-other, it is difficult to accept that after everything they have faced, they are still apart. But it is through seeing what they gave each-other, that we find hope for the future...Ultimately, rather it be Piltover or Zaun, In prison or free, dead or alive, the love these sisters have for one another stretches across all worlds..

To anyone who stuck with me on this, thank you. As I have with each of these deep dives I have gained a whole new appreciation for the true beauty of this story and its characters. Keep standing up for stories that matter.

[sweetdispatch]

Nervous (in a good way) - A. Fantilli

Songs masterlist

song: Nervous (in a good way) - Mae Muller

pairing: Adam Fantilli x fem!reader

summary: Adam almost failed lecture but this pushed him into her and wanting to make her his

warning: none

words: 1.3k

note: two songs left👀

---

She and Adam were attempting the same classes. He was focused so much on hockey that he almost failed one subject. Their professor told him to ask her to help him with a project and studying for an exam that was coming up. When his eyes laid on her, he was happy to do it. She gladly accepted his offer to help him with this.

It started with weekly study dates. Super fast they became friends and have been hanging out almost every single day. They develop feelings for each other but she told Adam that she’s not ready to get into relationship. He was disappointed but made this his mission to prove himself to her. Their relationship can be summed up by he fell first, she fell harder. 

Adam never thought that failing classes can bring him to the love of his life but he was thankful for that. They were coming from different worlds but they shared the same feelings and could understand each other without words. That was the most important thing for both of them. 

You said your house wasn’t far, “So come over”

She and Adam were coming back from their date. However it was still an early hour so he proposed to go to his room in college. She wasn’t sure about this idea. They haven’t been dating and wanted to take it slowly and see when it leads them. That’s why she was avoiding meeting him in his dorm. 

Adam saw her reaction and quickly said that no one was there because everyone went to a party. After debating, she agreed. They went to his dorm and as a real gentleman, he opened the door for her. They didn’t do anything special. He played a movie and they spent two hours commenting on every scene. 

When the movie ended, Adam proposed to drive her home. It was almost midnight and she knew that he had training tomorrow so he had to wake up early. She said that she can get back home by herself but he wasn’t too certain about letting her go at night. That’s why he insisted on driving her back. She knew there’s no point of arguing so she just nodded and let him guide her.

And the boys before loved to play their games

She had feelings for Adam. She appreciated him and all the things he was doing for her. Although she had bad memories from a previous relationships, that’s why she was scared to trust him fully and label what’s between them. He understood that and didn’t push her. He was waiting for the moment when she’ll be ready. 

Her trust issues were coming from all the guys she was flirting with back in high school. She was opening for them but they always left her without a word. She felt like she was just a part of a game for other guys. That's why she closed her heart and didn’t want to repeat it again. With Adam, it felt different, but she needed time. 

Yeah, you make me nervous

But in a good way

She felt so natural with Adam’s company. Nothing was forced and he was easy to talk with. She loved sharing his interests with him knowing that he doesn’t have a clue about them. He always listened to her stories with passion and asked her questions. At first, she was shy when he was asking her about everything but with time, she found it cute. She felt finally appreciated.

Sometimes, it made her nervous when she was around him. Adam had a great memory and he would ask her about things she told him weeks earlier. Many times, she was taken aback because she thought that he was asking her out of politeness but he genuinely cared about her and her stories. In those moments, she knew that he’s the right guy for her. 

I put my head on your chest 

And I felt your heart racing

One night, Adam came to her after his match. She was surprised to see him in front of her door but also was delighted that he trusted her enough to show up. It was a tough loss and she was willing to help him get over it. He laid in her bed and she did the same. She played a movie but when he hadn't said a word, she knew it was bad because he was always yapping during movies.

They haven’t been touchy. Adam didn’t want to throw himself into her personal space and she didn’t want to ruin their dynamic. This time, she risked it and cuddled into him. He gladly hugged her. She put her head on his chest and focused on his breath. They just laid in her bed cuddling and watching movie. After a couple of minutes, he thanked her for this. She hadn’t said anything, only clinged into him. 

I can make you nervous 

But in a good way

Adam never was a shy guy. He was outgoing and willing to make new friends but with her it felt different. When she was giving him compliments after his games or his looks, he was timid. From other people it felt normal but the moment she said it, he got all red. She meant a world to him and it was bizarre to him to hear those things from her mouth. 

His brother saw the effect she had on Adam. He knew that he fall hard for her because he never saw him this shy and nervous. It wasn’t uncommon for him to giggle after receiving messages from her. Luca was happy that his younger brother finally found someone who made him this way and hoped for them to work out. 

My cheeks turn red, ‘cause I get shy

With time, she opened on Adam. She was grateful for having him and they’ve been spending plenty of nights talking. He always found time for her in his busy schedule. His favorite thing was giving her compliments, pep talks and gifts. He loved seeing her so shy but the most he adored the way her cheeks were turning red from his affection towards her.

First time when Adam asked her out on a date, she was all red. She didn’t expect that and she tried to cover it. He laughed at this sight, making a mental note at her reaction. This was the view he wanted to see every day. In that moment, she fell for her seeing how she reacted to him. None of the girls ever reacted this way and he knew that she’s special. 

You start to stutter, can’t find your words

After the draft, Adam knew he had to ask her to be official. He didn’t want to lose her when he moved out. That’s why he planned a date in their favorite spot. He was nervous, not really sure if she would agree. He knew the risk of a long distance relationship but he needed her by his side. This whole year proved to him that she’s made for him.

On their date, Adam was a bundle of nerves. He didn’t know what to do or say. In casual situations, it was easier for him but he knew she deserved a princess treatment. When he saw her in a dress entering the restaurant, he was at a loss for words. He swore that he never saw such a beautiful woman. 

Adam couldn’t find the proper words to compliment her and was looking on her with such love. She felt nervous when he hadn’t spoken to her, thinking that she’s looking bad but she pushed the thoughts and started asking about his draft. He felt like he was ripped out of transe. From this moment, everything went smoothly until he knew that he needed to ask the question.

Adam started talking about their friendship and how grateful he was for meeting her. She was looking at him expecting the worst, but when he asked her to be his girlfriend, she froze. After a couple of nervous seconds, she agreed. She knew that he’s the best guy for her.

[miraculouslbcnreactions]

Why do you think they don't show Marinette comforting other characters? It's always been a weird writing decision to me, and I sometimes wondered if I was legit just erasing all the times it happened out of my memory or smth. Like the first character trait established for her is she struggles to say no to people, she is a people-pleaser. And there isn't a better way to make ur mc lovable than showing how they effect the people around them. AND it would make her breakdowns genuinely heartbreaking, because she keeps giving and giving and it's a genuine flaw. Like, she rushed off to comfort Ivan in Origins, right? We should have had more of that. I'm reminded of that one Lady Wifi (i think?) scene where Ladybug is smiling at her adoring fans and the camera while Chat Noir is in the background actually comforting a child lmao. It just feels so weird, because I think Marinette IS actually supposed to be someone who does that, who provides that comfort to her loved ones all the time (even at the cost of her own mental health, boom, an actual thing she can work towards). But we just keep getting the reverse instead. She just kinda feels like a shit friend? Showing that emotional labor would also make her exhaustion work because like, what does the guardian even DO? Tell not show, but they ain't telling shit.

One of the things that drew me to Miraculous is the fact that the show tends to write the characters in non-standard gender roles, so I actually like the fact that Marinette tends to be more of a fixer than a comforter. She drives people to action and wants to solve problems and is very good at taking the weight of the world on her shoulders, but she kind of sucks at emotional vulnerability and comforting people. It's genuinely a good flaw for her character and a lovely thing to see in a show aimed at girls. No, we don't all need to be stereotypically maternal figures. Women can be just as bad as men stereotypically are when it comes to emotions!

The problem is that the show is obsessed with Marinette holding every important role in the story, meaning that we don't get a more emotionally aware character or characters to balance her out. Nor do we get to see her learn that this is a flaw of hers and either improve or just own that she's bad at this and learn to trust someone else with these types of issues. (This is one of the many things I think Adrien should have been allowed to do, btw. Ladybug is the brains, Chat Noir should be the heart.) We also don't get a true sense of Marinette's struggles because the show's formulaic nature rarely allows for those types of problems.

The Lila thing is a good example. Lila says that she's going to destroy Marinette's friendships, but she literally can't do that because that would mean changing the way the characters relate on a massive scale and formula shows can't do that. So instead of seeing Marinette struggle as Lila lies and manipulates everyone into hating Marinette, we get extremely annoying episodes where Lila lies and everyone believes her, but no one gets all that upset at Marinette's constant accusations. They just treat it as a minor quibble which is actually more aggravating than Lila changing the status quo in my opinion.

There's also the issue that you brought up: we don't see Marinette truly struggling to be the guardian, so her new role doesn't feel like a big deal. Not much changes for her save for the kwamis being around now. We don't even know what her relationship with Master Fu was really like because he was barely ever on screen so we really don't feel her loss.

All of this is just another problem to lay at the feat of our ever-present issue: Miraculous does not have the right conflicts and characters for a formula show. Formula shows thrive off of things being lighthearted and the heroes lacking major flaws. Miraculous chose to make things somewhat serious and give everyone flaws that are just begging to be address, but that can't be because this is the wrong format for that type of thing.

In a team show where character arcs were a thing or even just one where character dynamics were a thing and Marinette was allowed to share the screen in a more balanced manner, then everything about her would work fine. She's set up perfectly for that kind of show. She is not set up for a formula show where she's basically the only character that matters outside of the villains. If that's what they wanted to write, then Marinette needed to be limited to minor flaws that never last more than an episode or at least limited to flaws that are purely situational such as being stubborn or the classic sudo-flaw of being clumsy that the show already embraces.

[planetcleer]

eddie kaspbrak loves cooking shows. like, he loves them. the food network is his favorite channel, and he watches everything from diners drives ins & dives to good eats to the pioneer woman, not to mention all the different cooking & baking competitions (gbbo is, ofc, his favorite) that crop up every year. eddie kaspbrak loves cooking shows, but eddie kaspbrak doesn’t know how to cook. it’s hilarious! it’s hysterical, even! because sure, for that brief period in college between sonia & myra, he learned some basics, like toast and grilled cheese and scrambled eggs, but for all he watches he’s pretty clueless in the kitchen. ask him to roast potatoes or make a soup from scratch and watch him flounder. he’s never had to do anything like that himself before, you know. he’s never been allowed to.

and it sucks, it does, because food is a form of love. and he knows that because, while he doesn’t have many memories of his dad, almost all of the ones he does have revolve around food. frank kaspbrak loved cooking. he loved best cooking polish recipes from his youth, stuffed cabbage and haluski (eddie’s favorite) and pierogis and chalka bread (eddie’s second favorite) and borscht, and eddie loved to watch. frank would hold eddie on his hip and let him see it all, even let him help sometimes, and when eddie got a little too big to be held, frank would drag a chair in from the dining room to the stove and hoist him onto it so he could stand and watch every step. while he chopped vegetables or showed eddie how to bread pork or worked on dough, frank would tell stories about his childhood, and how he learned to cook from his mother and his grandmother, and how he would cook with eddie until the recipes were all stuck in his head like they were stuck in how own, because they had never been written down before, and it made eddie feel close to him, made him giggle to think about his big strong dad being small and standing on a chair and watching just like him.

frank kaspbrak loved cooking, and then he got sick. very sick. the last memory eddie has of his dad is curling up with him in his hospital bed and listening to him whisper-rasp promises, with what was left of his ravaged lungs, of fresh chalka and pączki and haluski and potato pancakes once he got better. the trouble was that he never did.

lots of things changed after he was gone. eddie learned quickly that his dad hadn’t lied—none of his family’s recipes had ever been written down. he also learned that hospital food was not love, and neither was takeout, but that even though it was different, his mother’s cooking was, and even more so, over time she taught him that not letting him too close to the hot stove or sharp knives was love, too. cooking for him and not with him was love, keeping track of his allergies was love, teaching him to fear food that wasn’t good for him was love, because taking care of him was love.

myra seemed to know those things inherently, and when he married her, she showed him that she loved him in the same ways. she looked after him, she cooked for him, she made sure he stayed away from too much sodium and sugar and butter, she protected him from everything including himself.

and all the while, eddie kaspbrak loved cooking shows. well, he loves cooking shows. in the hospital, after pennywise, he watches a lot, and he learns, but not how to baste a turkey or throw together a corn salad. no, he learns that actually, takeout can be love when your friends sneak it into your hospital room to cheer you up, and yeah, okay, maybe hospital food can be love, too, when you have someone who will make you laugh about it or split your jell-o with.

he divorces myra once he’s out. his friends support him, and richie is quick to offer his home for eddie to stay while he gets back on his feet. eddie is just as quick to accept. they’ve always been best friends, haven’t they? he moves in more than he crashes. it sort of feels like they’re kids again. and, you know, richie tozier loves cooking. for the first time in thirty five years, eddie feels compelled to watch, and so most nights he perches on the other side of the island while richie pretends to be on a cooking show, just for him. it’s a fucking riot! but it’s something else, too. it’s special, because they laugh, and they talk about anything and everything and nothing, and they share their meals together every night, and it makes eddie feel close to him.

eventually, richie starts to involve eddie, calling him his lovely assistant, or his little sous chef. he walks eddie through the best way to cut up potatoes, or how to do a dry rub, or how to make an egg wash. eventually, he has eddie start sautéing the onions, or dredge and bread the pork chops, or throw together a fucking roux all on his own, without having to be shown. eventually, he starts to ask what eddie wants him to do, just as much as the reverse, and renames their imaginary cooking show after them both.

one year to the day after eddie moves in, richie shows him recipes he found online for chalka bread and some cabbage and noodle dish, i think it’s called haluski or something? whatcha think, chef k? eddie knows that richie knows exactly what haluski is. richie’s already gone and bought all the ingredients for both, and so they make them for dinner that night. richie lets eddie take the lead, and later he reaches across the table to hold his hand when eddie starts crying after the first bite. it tastes just like his father’s recipe, you know. it tastes like love and comfort and home. they wash up together after dinner, eddie scrubbing and richie drying as he yaps on in one of his voices, and eddie has to stop right in the middle of it to grab richie’s face with his soapy hands and kiss him. the rest of the dishes are left forgotten until the morning.

so yeah, eddie kaspbrak loves cooking shows, and he loves cooking, and holy shit, he loves richie tozier, too.