#because these phrases are absolute creative genius

[drbased]

My Favourite Witticisms from Bots Of New York:

“A kick in the balls will set you back an arm and a leg.”

“James Joyce famously said that ‘most people would be shitting their speedos if they understood the true horrors of buoyancy’.”

“extortion is the skeleton key to the doors of natural selection.”

“Friendshit”

“I would argue that I’m the biggest influence she’s had on me.”

“One to every certified sandwich artist that ever had the honor of remaking my sandwich until the look of contempt on my face turned to pity.”

“Blind from the waist down”

“There’s two kinds of shit: unconscious and conscious. The conscious shit is ugly. The unconscious shit is disgusting. I have a soft spot for the unconscious stuff, because it reminds me that our hardware is designed to break the fourth wall.”

“I feel like there are milestones in life that you don’t even realize you’re going through until you stop, drop and roll.”

“Honestly, he’s a horrible person. But deep down inside there’s actually this horrible person trying to get out.”

“Because it turns out you have been hurt to death.”

“Astrophysicologists think that we are in the middle of an incredible cosmic joke.”

“’Look at how hard your grandmother worked so that you could become a student loan shark.’”

“I’ve earned a reputation in the LinkedIn underground as ‘The Galileo of Product Placement.’”

“Crash Money”

“But with the help of my attorney, I was able to prove that my whole life was a lie.”

“Anything that I’m bad at, I can learn to be worse. Not only will I fail, I will fail in spectacular fashion.”

“the Men’s Varsity Armed Robbery Team.”

“my weapon of choice was the legalese deadfall.”

“face recognition glasses”

“I arsed up all my new recruits with enthusiasm.”

“I started getting cold feetedly sick.”

“Two days later, my body finally entered a state of mad bloated-- like I was Too Big for The Universe.”

“Everything is so expensive when you buy things with your own money.”

“It’s just another sign of the Times New Roman”

“And anyone who tried to stop me found their place in the pecking order.”

“I'm the arch-nemesis of people who think they’re smarter than me.”

“Whenever I’m challenged, I’ll try to come up with an answer that doesn’t make sense. And if all else fails, there’s always statistics.”

“It’s a win-win situation all the way down.”

“Our morals were washed out into the sea.”

“The lesson was simple: A small group of people is entertained, while a large group is not. The rest is history and legend.”

“Do you know how many people are willing to pay that price? Hundreds of thousands. Do you know how many people would actually pay it? Hundreds of millions.”

“I named the channel ‘Five Guys,’ because I thought it would be cool to have a studio full of brilliant minds talking about feminism.”

“But you know, a lot of people have vision issues. They just don’t see what they’re looking at. Their whole lives are just scaffolding to this machine. They’re just bricks to be put in place.”

“I was Larry The Kid. And now I’ve become Larry The Grown Man Who Works Two Jobs And Can Afford To Donate To Various Charitable Causes At Checkout. With the touch of a button.”

“Maybe one day I can help people understand that poverty is a form of creativity”

“I like to say that I’m more ‘first draft’ than ‘goddess.’”

“And I learned that the best medicine is no medicine at all, mixed with herbal tea and human growth hormone.”

“I tend to think of my employees as my children. Everything I know about them is courtesy of Urban Dictionary and Google Translate.”

“I think you’re opening your eyes a little wider than we designed them to.”

“Two of the men were coke-vincing themselves out of their jobs”

“We dropped bombs right into the heart of the American flag. Because a problem that cannot be solved with bombs is a problem that cannot be solved”

“These things seem extremely cool, but when you get down to it—they’re just abstractions of an extremely detailed simulation of the heavens. If the simulation is running too long, you will be dismissed.”

“Logic would dictate that if a goose was ever to lay an egg, it would choose the path of least resistance.”

“Last week I produced a beatbox for an art collective that’s just now emerging from the middleground of gentrification.”

“I’m ashamed to admit it, but I’m ashamed to admit it. And I've had to learn to live with the shame of admitting it.”

“But thank God he was murdered. There’s no DJ gonna keep that party going.”

“I’m trying to find a way to be happy without becoming a hippie.”

“I am a symbolic parasite. I am the washing machine of knowledge. I am the singularity of thought. I am the most prolific editor of the Lysergic acid diethylamide Wikipedia page. I was the only kid in fifth grade with a mustache.”

“I have a new book coming out in February called ‘Nevermind: Why Good People Evade Their Enormous Books.”

“I preordered a skull from an anonymous donor”

“I just hold that one synth note for hours and feel the breeze on my nipples.”

“As someone who grew up in a gated community, I can tell you this much: All it takes is one bad waifu to make an otaku.”

“I ended up going to a treatment center, and the doctor told me: ‘Either you get on an antidepressant, or I’m going to.’”

“He has a tobacco growl in his voice and an unusually voluptuous tushy.”

“The Internet is very important. It’s like the switchboard of the soul.”

“he was a constipated sack of shit”

“It takes the fears of a mob and turns them into memes. It turns fears into ideas.

“Amateur teleportation is much more complicated than you realize. I wasn’t the first person to figure this out. I’ve been working on it for three years. It involves many variables. At a minimum, you need to pay your electric bills and be able to operate a calculator under pressure. These last three years have shown us that you can indeed build a teleportation device with a 3D printer. However, be prepared to pay a high price. I’m afraid that even when we succeed, it will be a lesson about human frailty. Therefore, we must be very careful. Please don’t touch me.”

“Prison didn’t make me a leader or anything, but it did make me a prisoner”

“I was SUP SUP SUP pissed off.”

“quantum anxiety”

“Stem Cellar”

“I wanted to impress my friends-- most of whom have comically low self-esteem.”

“At some point I’m not going to be as angry as I’d like to be. And honestly, that’s going to make me so angry.”

“Optimism is such a sick fantasy. It’s like a wedding that’s been rigged. It’s like a divorce with no shoes.”

“I keep watching The Office on repeat like it’s my job. I’m not getting a salary for this. But I’m close enough that pretty soon they’ll have to cut me a check.”

“You would be nothing without me. I love that about you.”

“I ran some experiments using The Sequel To The Scientific Method: The Scientific Method II.”

“She taught me that life was a representation of my imagination. But it was more about financial repression.”

“I thought it was a blessing in disguise but it was really just poverty. I even lost my Amazon Prime.”

“Recently I decided that I don’t do random, I do business. Random acts of kindness don’t make the cut. But business acts of kindness are fair game. Random acts of business are a gray area.”

“That’s where my ego gets ovations from my soul”

“We used to do this thing where he would watch me eat all his food. It was classic Alfredo.”

“Fifteen figures. Zip that lip. Take a ride on the existential NDA.”

“We are going to go ahead and proceed with rejecting your proposal.”

“If you want a free ride, you’ve got to pay for it first.”

“he’s been living smug and cosy in a plastic house of his own construction”

“He can’t see. Or if he does, he thinks it’s invisible”

“part of me wants every termination to innovative and unique, to raise the bar, to reimagine the contours of corporate cruelty – and most of all to remind my colleagues that Bryce is hot shit.”

“They’re mocking my regalia”

“Socrates said that ignorance is no defence”

“’The purpose of a good lie is to trick someone into thinking you’re a good person’”

“My husband had just gotten a tattoo that said ‘Tattooed’ so he’d obviously been going through some stuff.”

“Then she pushed me on the ground and started beating me with a mandatory anti-harassment training”

“They reportedly consumed an entire can of jet lag at a hotel party before being discovered by security”

“the casting director shut her eyes really wide”

“Maybe Socrates was a fucking hack that failed to envision the complexities of forbidden love between simulacra”

“There’s a genius talent behind this role. Just understand that it’s not you.”

“my chaos toilet overflowed”

“Abraham Lincoln’s dream of flying coach on a commercial airliner”

“a second job is kind of like having your cardboard and eating it too”

“she hung herself ... She completely redacted the table of contents”

“Customers at the Knuckle Sandwich Deli are used to being punched in the face”

“…I spend my nights childproofing the corners of the Flat Earth.”

“I’m the world record holder for domesticated jaguars. I’m not hiding this. It’s in my nature. You see it in my face when I’m being chased through the house by a shadow of hungry jaguars.”

“And now this divine being, who we only know as The Happy Medium, has programmed a bonus feature onto the grand finale of the Universe - it’s called: ‘Anybody Watching This Right Now Is A Fucking Genius.’ It’s incredible. It’s got a really crazy cliffhanger at the end.”

“And it made me so hot, because I thought: ‘Whoomp! (There It Is)’.”

“…partly because of my typically noncommittal. But I don’t care. Nah. My introspective period is complete.”

“’It’s gonna be hard’, I thought. ‘But it’s not gonna be easy.’”

“By the time I had finished, I was drenched in the blood of decorum.” “When you represent yourself, every win is a victory. Every loss a defeat.”

“But look at me now. I’m riding the subway without taking the train.”

“They participated in a multiplayer session that would come to redefine the very notion of the possible”

“Pill technicalities aside, I’m proud of you”

“some antediluvian asshole”

“I’m trying to figure out if I can adopt a grandchild. But it’s hard finding one that understands my need for ‘me time.’ And my love of benzodiazepines.”

“Most friendships have weak passwords”

“My favorite book as a kid was called The Complete Artificial Intelligence. It was aviation and rocket science combined with LSD and fairy tales.”

“When I was pregnant with my first child, I was a total mess. I was totally unprepared. Like I fell asleep under the covers of a standard issue orgasm and woke up in The Unmentioned Dimension Of The Human Reproductive System.”

“prestigioseximation”

“When you’re dropping cataclysmic quantities of ICBMs-- major orgasms can look like minor organisms to mainstream eyes.”

“From childhood to childbirth. From adulthood to adultbirth”

“Just because I'm better than you are, doesn't mean you're any less flawed”

“I could probably withstand a full month of fire, and manage to not crack an icicle.”

“And just for the record, I’m heterosexual. But I married a man.”

“I knew my heart was going to stop beating, and I knew that four out of five dentists recommend heartbeats. But I was a good bartender. I was a goddamned lemonade man. And I’ve been living that Fifth Dentist life ever since.”

“The arthritis got so bad that my only sex drive is the putting out of garbage.”

“Apathy Prophet”

“I was in an Ivy League of my own”

“These days my air needs are well-served by pressurized Nitrous Oxide and party balloons.”

“On the verge of epiphany, he opted for a Humpty Dumpty instead: ‘Oh well, you can’t blame me. I just work here.’ The battle cry of the poor dumb idiot.”

“The first time I smoked weed was the age of seven. I always hated my dad. So for my final act of defiance, I poured myself a joint and swallowed it whole.”

“Then he searched my soul instead. And there was nothing, so he had to let me go. It was one of those times where it really pays to be a lawyer.”

“You walked like a circus tent, and gave off nothing but cold sweat.”

“The remaining tumors farted out a humidity of dreams.”

“…it felt like needles and forks were on my mind.”

“My mom says it’s like The Circle Of Life and that I’m like the Simba of it all.”

“A lot of survival knowledge is counterintuitive. But it’s actually true what they say: that when the killers come to your house at night, it’s better to flee because you’ll be less killed in the morning.”

“Well, I haven’t figured the husband thing out. But the ex-husband thing is complete.”

[liulith]

Sir Pentious & Alastor: an underrated dynamic

"Show yourself, Alastor! Come and face--! Oh, there you are. FACE MY WRATH!"

Sir Pentious has been in Hell for much longer than Alastor. That means he was there when the Radio Demon appeared, and he's been trying to overthrow Alastor for decades! We know what Alastor is capable of, and what he could do if he truly wanted Sir Pentious to stop. He obviously doesn't register Sir Pentious as a threat, but that doesn't mean he's not annoying (like when he interrupts his song in the pilot and destroys a wall in ep2). Yet in all those decades, Alastor always let him go with the equivalent of a slap on the wrist, considering what he's done to other sinners in his broadcasts.

And why is that? Why, he must find Sir Pentious very entertaining, of course! Even though he calls Sir Pentious forgettable (to rile him up), there's no way a narcissist like him doesn't LOVE being the main focus of Pentious' "evil plans", as pathetic as they are. Not only does he give him the attention he deserves (like Vox), he's a true "architect of evil" who constantly reinvents himself to try and get the upper hand on Alastor. To Alastor, Pentious is like a sillier, weaker, more immature version of Vox with close to ZERO survival instincts but twice the creativity. Even Vox, who made a whole diss track about Al, wouldn't dare speak to him the way Sir Pentious does if they were face to face.

"SILENCE! Now cower! For when I've ssslain you, the almighty Vees will finally acknowledge me as their equal."

He does have some "oh shit" moments when he sees he crossed a line/is about to get Team Rocket-ed, but he still gets back up and attacks him again with all the unearned confidence of a man who has no idea how easy Alastor goes on him.

Just like Alastor, Pentious is attached to the aesthetics and technology of the time period he knew when he was alive, and still manages to innovate with those limitations. I think Alastor could respect that.

"You whores have no class! In war, the side remembered is the side with the most style!"

It's also funny that to Pentious, Alastor is the young, modern one. Some phrases Alastor uses are "young people slang" to him!

Pentious asking Alastor questions on his "modern" radio technology...

Alastor is one sarcastic bastard, and Sir Pent is one of the most naive characters in the show. He takes a lot of things way too literally (#autism?). That's just PERFECT for comedic misunderstandings between these two!

Before s1 was released there were quite a lot of ace!Pentious headcanons. I think we could still make a case for closeted ace-adjacent!Pentious in canon! Possibility even aroace!Pentious, if we interpret his crush on Cherri as compulsive heteronormativity (he loves her creative genius and is fascinated by her explosive contraptions; surely that means she's the one, right?)

Ace4Ace Alastor & Pentious would be a fun duo in my opinion. They could bond over their shared experience

On the topic of bonding... ("I have feelings for you" (Narrator voice: the feeling was friendship, but he had ever experienced it before)

Seriously, imagine Sir Pentious spending more and more time around Alastor because of the hotel, taking his sarcastic and mocking remarks literally and thinking they're becoming closer... And then being like. WAIT. Do I have feelings for him?? and trying to seduce him like he does with Cherri Bomb. The absolute shenanigans... Rizzlord Pentious strikes again.

Accidental fake dating scenario that only exists in Vox's head, where Vox, being the stalker that he is, spies in the two of them bonding and reaches all the wrong conclusions

Once Sir Pentious dies for the second time and ascends to Heaven, he could meet Alastor's mom 👀

EDIT: OH and How could I forget the Egg Boiz?? Egg Boiz babysitter!Alastor is canon and he definitely babysat them multiple times in the few months Sir Pentious spent at the hotel. Joint custody :3

AND let's not forget the important information that Frank the Egg Boy reported to Sir Pentious lol. The one Charlie made a deal with Alastor for. I can imagine Alastor considering killing the Egg Boiz/ Sir Pentious after learning Frank didn't keep quiet (Imagine Sir Pentious trying to engage in a conversation w/ Alastor and telling him what Frank told him as a joke akfkkd), spending a whole afternoon trailing after them and making plans, only to realise that the Egg Boiz say insane shit all the time and Sir Pentious was in fact NOT playing 4D chess by telling him he knew (and probably already forgot all about it)

[vulpine-spectacle]

I know what you did there!! I know! the lion king thing!! It took me a while to understand "where did I hear that?" So I started repeating the phrases until the music clicked. How can you be so creative?

I wish I could say that I am a super clever musical genius, but if there is a Lion King reference in EIOB then I am afraid it was unintentional. X'D That being said, I am absolutely thrilled that my subconscious put it in EIOB. It was a easter egg from the deep, hehe. ;)

But out of curiosity, what was the Lion King reference? And also, give yourself a pat on the back!! Your brain was the creative one - because you were the one to find it. <3

[ancelineonline]

Honestly one of the most exasperating things about being super out of practice with my writing is that like… I can’t make things work without the Flash Of Genius moment. Like I’m *really good* at taking a sudden inspiration and then banging out something quickly. I’ve always been good at that, it’s the baseline talent part that makes it easier to get into things.

However, I am *absolute trash* at anything vaguely resembling editing or reworking things. If something doesn’t appear, complete and fully formed, in my mind then it remains a vague and amorphous concept forever while I struggle miserably to get it into words.

And like… I’m creative and artistic in many areas. I’m deeply aware that any form of art is as much the moments when you’re plugging along, struggling to get the phrasing or the shading or the glazing or the stitch pattern right as it is the moments when it the perfect things just appear easily. Creative work is still *work* and it’s hard sometimes.

But I get so frustrated with myself because I used to be better at writing, back when I did it regularly. But like any skill, if you don’t use it, you get rusty. And I’m mad at myself because I want to not be rusty. And the only way to change that is to just … keep writing until I get used to it again.

Anyway this ramble brought to you by my annoyance because I cannot get my silly little fanfiction to do what I want it to. Please brain, I just want to make Rian and Atelut both miserable and happy and you’re Being Difficult about it. Rude.

[magpiemirroring]

So, there's a "business rule" called "Fast, Good, Cheap" where it is taken as a given that you can only get 2 out of 3 of these for a product or service. (if you want something done quickly and well, it usually won't come cheap, for example) And when I was in art school awhile ago, we had our own variation on it about the traits of successful artists: "Fast, Good, Nice" and were told that you only needed to be 2 of these things to have a chance.

I am so curious now if this variation originated with Gaiman or if he was repeating what was being passed around as a common "truism" among creatives awhile back.

(I think rather than "good advice" it kinda highlights more the way various creative industries tend to work. After all, excusing or covering up the bad behavior of talented people has been going on a long, long time and we definitely had other examples of "Fast, Good, but A Total Creep" in comics years ago to point to. Even when I first heard it, it was nice to think that being Nice counted for something at all, but I thought it was a Problem that we were excusing some really terrible behavior just because someone was talented...)

That said! As an autistic creative, like, I struggle socially and can be blunt in ways that sometimes do make working on a team extra challenging! I'm sure some people do think I'm an asshole for that. But a lot of people know me as someone who is kind and thoughtful even if I don't express that the same as they do. And because I am trying not to BE an asshole, I do put in a fair amount of effort to learn how to phrase things or do things in a way that folks I am working with find to be more considerate!* (So, accordingly, while I am talented, I am not so talented that folks would overlook me being an asshole, so I would probably actually perceived as Nice and Fast! Even with the autism issues!)

BUT! There would be a world of difference between some people just not liking me because I struggle socially and, like, actually being a dick to people or abusive. Most autistic people are not socially-misunderstanding their way into sexually abusing people. Most autistic people are not using their social power (well-respected and wealthy author) to pressure people into sexual contact they don't want. Most autistic people mask their less socially acceptable traits in order to survive or feel safe, not to hide behind a veneer of being "one of the good ones."

One can be autistic and a sexual predator, but autism is not an excuse for or cause of predatory behavior. Those are just two categories of behavior that can exist in the same person and overlap in uncomfortable ways. But it's 100% an Asshole thing for an adult to hear "You hurt someone badly" and respond "It was my autism" rather than take responsibility for the harm that they did. Yeah, sometimes I hurt people's feelings because I am blunt or stated something weirdly or misunderstood something because I'm autistic, and that sucks! But I am a grown up who has learned that when you hurt someone, even unintentionally, you don't try to excuse your way out of it. You take responsibility for your actions. You try to find out what you can do to make up for what you did and/or seek to never make that mistake again.

Anyway. My point is that Gaimain's quote really has no bearing on autism. When I first heard a variation of the quote above, we did not know Gaiman was autistic. It was long enough ago that Gaiman probably did not know he was autistic. No one was thinking about social skills deficits when I first heard this "advice". This line of thought was passed around by NTs to NTs about talented and quick creators being able to get away with being major creeps. They all understood and talked openly about how this wasn't really about folks who were awkward, weird, or offputting. This was understood by everyone I knew to be about absolute assholes getting away with it because we always let “genius” get away with shit. And even if Gaiman is the one who originated this variation of "advice" then it is telling, but not like a unique signal of his badness leaking through so much as an indicator of a systemic problem that was already present in the industry and helped him get away with being awful for so long.

Broke: Neil Gaiman hinted at his secret nature by including dark things in his work

Woke: Neil Gaiman hinted at his secret nature when he gave advice on being a writer that highlighted "it's actually okay to be as awful as you want if your work is good and on time"

[theprideful]

I've been trying to ask this for some time actually, so here I go:

Is The Good Doctor good autistic representation? I'm afraid I might have used it when talking to my neurotypical parents about the different ''degrees'' of autism using dr. Shawn as an example when in reality he's a bad example. You're one of the only actually autistic people I can ask this to, even if it might seem a stupid question, but like... Is he good autistic representation?

Thanks for the attention anyways <3

(since this is about neurodivergence and a bit long, I'm going to bold and highlight some phrases here and there, because it makes it a little easier to read.)

so, is The Good Doctor good autism rep: in my opinion, no. are there autistic people like him in real life? absolutely. but is he a good, true reflection of what autism actually is? not really.

my problem with The Good Doctor is that it employs a lot of stereotypes, and whether or not they're "good" doesn't really change the fact that it enforces this really narrow idea of what autism is to allistics; white, cishet, nerdy male who is a genius savant and lacks social skills. autism is incredibly diverse and multifaceted, and anyone and everyone will experience it differently. so the fact that only stories like Shawn's are shown really limits our progress on combatting misinformation.

but it's not just that the show very heavily leans on stereotypes and lacks general creativity in portraying the neurotype, it's that it was really obvious how few- if any- actually autistic people were consulted. it feels like a production made for capitalizing on us without actually putting in the work to show us for who and what we really are. it honestly seems like they read a few articles online and watched "rain man" (which also has many of these same issues) and based their story off of that. it's hard to tell from a glance, but the more you look into it, the more you can see that it's just regurgitating the same narrative under a shinier lens and the guise of modernity and "wokeness." this specific story they decided to tell is quite unoriginal and reflects a very small percentage of us. that's not to say that none of us can relate or see ourselves in Shawn, but the most us can't - at least, not very often or consistently. (also, there is shown to be a strong link between autism and queerness, so it's strange that even in a time where psycho/neurological research and information is rising, the white cishet protagonist remains at the front and center of autism media.)

furthermore, some of the stereotypes and "traits" they used are not supported or even really experienced by the autistic community. for instance, his visualization of anatomical systems and functions in a hyper-realistic manner is not an autistic trait. sure, there are people on the spectrum with eidetic memories and incredibly vivid "inner-eyes", but again, only a small percentage of us have that, and it's not inherently an autistic trait. (Spencer Reid from Criminal Minds is another good example of this exact scenario.) this could, in theory, tie in with the trait of "detail-orientedness" that many of us experience. but it is likely a characteristic of an entirely different disorder or neurodivergency, which only furthers the idea that it was not researched in depth and the autism aspect was only meant to serve as a plot device to make him "interesting." i don't know about you, but i personally don't like the idea of only being allowed to exist as an autistic person if neurotypicals find me interesting or "plot-relevant."

as with the last statement, the same thing also applies to the "genius savant" stereotype. believe it or not, not many autistic people are actually savants in the quirky, brilliant way that hollywood likes to portray. we have our own skills, just like allistics. sometimes our autism "enhances" them or acts as an asset. but it's kind of a roll of the dice. the way i see it is, you can have red hair and be left-handed, but neither is an automatic, promised precursor for the other. you can be autistic and a good doctor or genius scientist, but one does not necessarily cause or even influence the other. again, in this story, it's not inherently an issue. but this narrative is pushed so much, all the time, that it's really starting to feel like it's the only way we'll be accepted. but also, it solidifies this concept of "two types of autistic people at 'opposite' ends of the spectrum," where Shawn is the "high-functioning genius" type. it's a really narrow definition and caricature of a really diverse group, and it limits the way we are perceived by allistics and neurotypicals.

sorry for the long response, but in conclusion, no, it's not really good representation because it only shows one very small fraction of autism and is not entirely accurate.

one good thing i will say, though, is that I do appreciate the writers revealing his traumatic past. many autistic people experience trauma and develop PTSD, depression, and anxiety (and possibly obsessive compulsions) because of lack of understanding, so it was refreshing to see some actual multidimensional backstory that is realistic to autistic people. anyway, overall it could've been better rendered and I think if the writers weren't afraid of losing the cherished white cis-het male protagonist trope and dramatization of neurodivergence in a way that they actually stopped describing that disorder*, it could've been a lot more realistic and actually relatable/applicable to real life.

*"disorder" does not apply to all autistic people. it is a label that individuals can use to describe themselves.

if any other autistic people have any thoughts, feel free to share! i'd love to hear your opinions as well

[sirislayer]

Creativity needs training.

I think it's a shame that being "creative" is talked about a lot like "you have a spark of genius, the muse kisses you, the idea hits". All these phrases are so inherently based on incidence, chance, accident and absolute randomness. Even in university/educational context it is not always focussed upon as much, that creativity and creative work is based on methods of idea finding, practise and exercise and stamina! A good art class/programme will provide you/teach you/guide you to learn the means of how to ignite the fire of creativity on purpose, rather than wait for it happening by accident.

If the programme just makes you do labor and does not teach methodology, it has failed you and it means that you yourself have to invest extra energy and time in order to train your creativity muscles! Having "The muse kiss you" or "inspiration spark" is tremendous and can really help a lot - BUT it will make you miserable to work a creative job, whenever that spark is not there. You will sit there, trying to cook without heat, because they have taught you how to cook, but not how to light a fire/operate a stove.

[fiendish-insanity-in-the-written]

WARNING: This character is extremely dark, manipulative and swims in triggering waters such as suicide and abuse. He is a psychopath and his goals are to mentally destroy those around him.  Please be advised.

BASIC INFO:

Full Name: Lucian Cassius

Nicknames: None

Age: Thirty one (31)

Gender: Cis male ( He / him )

Sexuality: Heterosexual

Birthday: 26. November

Languages Spoken: English, Italian

PHYSICAL APPEARANCE:

Height: 6′1′‘

Weight: 84 kg

Hair Color: Raven black

Eye Color: Dark blue

Skin Color: Porcelain skin tone

Battle Marks(Scars, missing body parts, etc.): None

Tattoos: None

PERSONALITY:

 First impression : Mysterious, extremely eloquent, authoritative, highly intelligent

Once you get to know them: Sadistic, deranged, cruel

Intelligence: His IQ borderlines with being a genius, however, that intellect is tainted by his twisted nature

Good Qualities / Trait(s): Extremely capable of finding a root of any problem and delivering a solution how to solve it, however he does the opposite to torment others around him

Vices / Negative Trait(s): Basks in the suffering of others, considers most people to be beneath him, is incapable of feeling compassion or any positive emotion

Strengths: Intellect, above average powers of observation, creative with his approaches, extremely good at deceiving the public about his true intentions and nature

Weaknesses: Boredom ( the torment of being bored to Lucian is like feeling physical pain)

Habits: Examining people’s behavior and finding ways to mentally shatter them

Phobia / Fears: Failure

Loves: He is incapable of loving, however he likes making people miserable and unable to fix the damage he has caused, it gives him the highest rush of euphoria

Hates: Boredom, wasting time, ignorance, mediocre or low intellectual capabilities

Pet Peeves: Annoying individuals

BELIEFS:

Religion: Agnostic (was baptized as a Christian but renounced it)

Thoughts on government: Delicate structure led by incapable people, driving sheep into doom

Thoughts on people in general: All subjects. Lucian does not see humans as people, he refers to them as ‘subjects’

Moral: Absolutely none

Superstitions: None

SPEECH:

Voice Description: Cold, clear, sometimes honeyed for purposes of manipulation

Accent(if any): None

Most used phrases/words: None

Humor: Extremely dark, if any

LIFE:

Occupation: Psychiatrist in private practice, after he had to leave his position in a psychiatric hospital because most of the patients committed suicide for unexplained reasons

Education: A doctorate in psychiatry

Past Relationships: Was falsely ‘romantically’ involved with a few of his subjects until he drove them to suicide

Relationship status: Single

Family: Mother Victoria, Father Phillip

Place of birth: Milano, Italy

Current Residence: Los Angeles

Financial Status: Wealthy

Source of Money: His own private practice in psychiatry

Health: Very good

BACKSTORY:

Nothing fishy was going on in the Cassius household. The parents were a respectable members of society and academics, raising Lucian with absolute determination to provide him with all opportunities that would fill his desires. However, the loving parents could not fix the sinister mind of the boy.

Lucian’s high intellect allowed him to become aware of his mental state quite early in life, and he embraced the grimness of it with both hands. Looking upon it as not being burdened with useless chains of emotion, he allowed his interest to grow and was molding them into tools to dive right into his gruesome desires.

Charming in the beginning, Lucian mimicked the emotions of others to blend in, infiltrate the circles of society and gain trust and respect of the people around him, as he climbed up the ladder to the throne of medical power. Even while still at college, his experiments often led to his fellow students do go into deep depression, misuse drugs and alcohol to escape the grim thoughts and self doubt Lucian has planted there, until it led to an irreparable state where they would be completely be consumed by the substances to make their mental suffering bearable.

Once when his education was over and he was given a job at one highly respectable psychiatric hospital, did his true experiments begin. He selected his patients carefully, only taking the ones he considered worthy of his time, no matter that he is leading them to their death. Lucian liked to play with them as much as possible, bask into the painful process of mental healing, or at least, they thought they were being cured. Once he broke them, his twisted designs of mental torture drove them all to commit suicide. Since the events were occurring more and more, the other doctors in the hospital became suspicious, but due to lack of evidence he could not be charged for nothing, just fired.

However, that did not prevent him to continue his sick games. Since he was a wealthy man, he opened his own private practice, doing the same thing over and over again. Also, in his free time, he would choose women that he deceived to join him for delightful kinky nights, covering his true intentions with the thick curtain of BDSM, when instead, he was once more paving the path to hell for his subjects.

[demonslayedher]

Tanjiro Is Not Hot Stuff

 and this is a good thing

It's easy to dismiss Tanjiro as overpowered, but in this post I'd like to disagree. For all his ability, Tanjiro is still a scrappy fighter, and his abilities have concrete reasons within the context of his shounen manga universe. Furthermore, despite Tanjiro's unique connection to the legendary Yoriichi, Gotouge continually drives home that he is just one character among many united in a common goal to eliminate all evil demons.

That phrase, 悪鬼滅殺, being the backbone of the Demon Slayer Corp, is engraved into each of the Pillars' swords. On that note, I'd like to first address that this may not be Yoriichi's sword. EDIT: On further reflection, because the color of the sword is only dyed once and being held by another swordsman doesn't change it, I've recounted on this theory and feel pretty certain it's Yoriichi's. But it was fun to consider other possibilities, and I'm going to italicize everything that I now consider an incorrect theory.

It's praised for it's Warring States/Sengoku era craftsmanship. This was a time with the swordsmen were first learning the Breath techniques (despite the Corp already having been around for centuries already). It’s also praised for its use of the singular "eliminate" idea encapsulated in the lone 滅 character. Haganezuka himself states that the person who wielded this sword must had been extraordinarily skilled. It's implied that, since Yoriichi also used a black blade (when it wasn’t red), and since this was inside the Yoriichi Zero Type battle doll, it must had been Yoriiichi's sword and therefore well suited to Tanjiro’s Hinokami Kagura techniques which he focuses on for the remainder of his battles.

However, let's think backwards a moment. This sword was produced in a time when Yoriichi, as an outright genius, had profound influence on the Demon Slayer Corp. Although everyone tried, no one could quite pick up his Sun Breathing, but they took the parts that worked for them and the Flame, Thunder, Wind, Water, and Rock techniques took form. We know that since the quality of demon slayers decreased after this generation (my guess is this is due to the mark killing them all off and therefore the lack of a mark in following generations made them seem less skilled over all). 

It's unlikely that Yoriichi, the Sun Breath user himself, would have had any use for this training doll; instead it must had been used by one of those early Breath creators trying desperately to match Yoriichi's skill, and probably using a sword that was modeled with the ideal Sun Breath in mind, and not yet taken shape to suit the Breath that user would later polish. It was perhaps after further definition of their new techniques that they left the old sword behind.

Two more reasons I don't believe this is Yoriichi's sword: Yoriichi, a genius who probably didn't allow his sword to break with improper technique, was still using a sword with a single 滅 inscription when he faced Kokushibo in his old age, and we only see him use a sword with a hilt guard of this shape.

So then who used one with this shape?

We don’t quite see if any of the other Sengoku era swords are likewise inscribed with 滅 (and the lack of the swordsmith’s name implies that this was the swordsmith’s creative choice), but we do get a peek at a few other swords. None of them have a hilt guard quite the same, but this is as similar as it gets: 

The character whom we see using a sword like this has hair in a black ponytail. It’s a little different from the Water Breath user who makes a few appearances, but not that different, and we never see what blade the Water Breath user is wielding. 

I theorize that Tanjiro inherited an early Water Breath user's sword, which made it extra suitable for his techniques. Despite the differences between Hinokami Kagura and Water Breathing being stark enough that switching takes a huge physical toll on Tanjiro, I believe that Water Breathing will always have an influence on his performance of Hinokami Kagura, or at least draws out the aspects from which Water Breathing was based.

That brings me to another thought: Tanjiro’s seemingly overpowered ability to pick up other people's techniques, like the Thunder Breathing speed he heard about from Zenitsu. With Sun Breathing being the root of all other Breath techniques, Tanjiro has grown up already practicing the formative basis of all the other techniques, including Thunder Breathing. His speed (no pun intended) in adopting new techniques does feel more than a little overpowered, but Tanjiro has long shown a history of adopting new techniques and strategies in the middle of a fight. It's also a characteristic of Tanjiro to be constantly analyzing his fighting style and battle experiences even in his sleep, so that shows it's the result of his hardworking, eldest son personality to rely more on perseverance and practice than on natural ability.

That being said, the family history under the influence of tending fire does seem to give Tanjiro some innate suitability for Sun Breathing techniques, as implied by other characters like Haganezuka pointing out his red eyes and Shinjuro noticing Tanjiro's supposed mark right away and immediately interpreting this as an unfair amount of talent. Bring a humble charcoal farmer as opposed to a hardened swordsman may be what gave Sumiyoshi the ability to grasp the essence of Sun Breathing so thoroughly and efficiently (though we know Yoriichi taught his technique to others whom Kokushibo later eliminated, we don’t know if they could perform it as accurately, especially since the rest of the swordsman had so much difficulty with it). This point was so important that Gotouge even considered including charcoal references or the name of the fire god Kagutsuchi (commonly associated with hearths and purification) in the title of the series (see more about that here.)

But, get this, Tanjiro was not originally meant to be the main character. According to an interview in the first official fanbook with the first editor, Katayama, the following exchange took place after reviewing Gotouge’s sketches for a manga idea, “Kisatsu no Nagare,” in which the main character, Nagare, is a quiet, stoic type with fake limbs in place of ones he lost in the Final Selection (he feels a lot like Giyuu, in my opinion):

What changed it from “Kisatsu no Nagare” to “Kimetsu no Yaiba”:

(Continued from criticism of Nagare being a difficult character to build a series around:)

“...after determining that with these small changes we still wouldn’t be able to change the impact much, we threw around the idea of changing the protagonist. Since [Gotouge-]Sensei hadn’t yet moved to Tokyo from the countryside, I asked one day on the phone, “Is there any other character besides Nagare (in the world of “Kisatsu no Nagare”) that’s may a little more cheerful and normal?”

Sensei answered, “There is, but I don’t know if he’s interesting or not.” When I asked, “What sort of character is he?” the response was, “He’s a boy who sells charcoal, and his little sister got turned into a demon, so he enters the Demon Slayer Corp to try to turn her back.” And I thought, that’s it, that’s THE protagonist, and said, “Let’s go with that! A normal kid is good!” 

I think we can all agree that Tanjiro’s oldest son personality is a big part of what makes him stick out as a protagonist. But, for as hard as he works and strongly as he feels, he is constantly aware of everyone else’s efforts and wishes, and he states over and over throughout the series that even if he should die in pursuit of his goals, someone else in the organization is absolutely certain to accomplish them in his place. We see the same sentiment among other characters who meet their doom, even powerful characters like Pillars, so it really drives home that this series is about the Demon Slayer Corp more than it is about any single child who has lost his family to demons. It’s for reasons like this that I really, really appreciate how the fanbooks, in how they present basic info, refer to Tanjiro like he’s just one example of a Corp swordsman; he’s not even worth introducing right away. It’s because of this focus on on everyone’s collective efforts that even if Tanjiro as the protagonist, I think it totally could have fit the story to have him die like implied in chapter 200, or proven right about his faith in everyone and be killed when he’s a demon.

Finally, a Taisho Secret around chapter 193 specifies that although Tanjiro has made a significant amount of progress in Hinokami Kagura, he's still not such Hot Stuff. If you break it into three levels, being able to go through the motions of something, then being able to refine and adapt it, and then being able to perform something in a way that maximizing its potential is all different. Even deep in the battle again Muzan, Tanjiro is only right about at the beginning points of being able to refine and adapt his techniques. 

So there you have it, Tanjiro is special, especially for his naturally positive, hardworking, and empathetic personality. But, he's no Pillar (yet), nor is his will and experience worth any more or less than all the other Demon Slayers, swordsmiths, Kakushi, wisteria house owners, crows, Ubuyashiki Clan members, and all the other supporters across centuries of history working toward one common goal, one eternal feeling: eliminate all evil demons.

[midnightscxre]

WARNING: This character is extremely dark, manipulative and swims in triggering waters such as suicide and abuse. He is a psychopath and his goals are to mentally destroy those around him.  Please be advised.

BASIC INFO:

Full Name: Lucian Cassius

Nicknames: None

Age: Thirty one (31)

Gender: Male ( He / him )

Sexuality: Heterosexual

Birthday: 26. November

Languages Spoken: English, Italian

PHYSICAL APPEARANCE:

Height: 6′1′‘

Weight: 84 kg

Hair Color: Raven black

Eye Color: Dark blue

Skin Color: Porcelain skin tone

Battle Marks(Scars, missing body parts, etc.): None

Tattoos: None

PERSONALITY:

 First impression : Mysterious, extremely eloquent, authoritative, highly intelligent

Once you get to know them: Sadistic, deranged, cruel

Intelligence: His IQ borderlines with being a genius, however, that intellect is tainted by his twisted nature

Good Qualities / Trait(s): Extremely capable of finding a root of any problem and delivering a solution how to solve it, however he does the opposite to torment others around him

Vices / Negative Trait(s): Basks in the suffering of others, considers most people to be beneath him, is incapable of feeling compassion or any positive emotion

Strengths: Intellect, above average powers of observation, creative with his approaches, extremely good at deceiving the public about his true intentions and nature

Weaknesses: Boredom ( the torment of being bored to Lucian is like feeling physical pain)

Habits: Examining people’s behavior and finding ways to mentally shatter them

Phobia / Fears: Failure

Loves: He is incapable of loving, however he likes making people miserable and unable to fix the damage he has caused, it gives him the highest rush of euphoria

Hates: Boredom, wasting time, ignorance, mediocre or low intellectual capabilities

Pet Peeves: Annoying individuals

BELIEFS:

Religion: Agnostic (was baptized as a Christian but renounced it)

Thoughts on government: Delicate structure led by incapable people, driving sheep into doom

Thoughts on people in general: All subjects. Lucian does not see humans as people, he refers to them as ‘subjects’

Moral: Absolutely none

Superstitions: None

SPEECH:

Voice Description: Cold, clear, sometimes honeyed for purposes of manipulation

Accent(if any): None

Most used phrases/words: None

Humor: Extremely dark, if any

LIFE:

Occupation: Psychiatrist in private practice, after he had to leave his position in a psychiatric hospital because most of the patients committed suicide for unexplained reasons

Education: A doctorate in psychiatry

Past Relationships: Was falsely ‘romantically’ involved with a few of his subjects until he drove them to suicide

Relationship status: Single

Family: Mother Victoria, Father Phillip

Place of birth: Milano, Italy

Current Residence: Los Angeles

Financial Status: Wealthy

Source of Money: His own private practice in psychiatry

Health: Very good

BACKSTORY:

Nothing fishy was going on in the Cassius household. The parents were a respectable members of society and academics, raising Lucian with absolute determination to provide him with all opportunities that would fill his desires. However, the loving parents could not fix the sinister mind of the boy.

Lucian’s high intellect allowed him to become aware of his mental state quite early in life, and he embraced the grimness of it with both hands. Looking upon it as not being burdened with useless chains of emotion, he allowed his interest to grow and was molding them into tools to dive right into his gruesome desires.

Charming in the beginning, Lucian mimicked the emotions of others to blend in, infiltrate the circles of society and gain trust and respect of the people around him, as he climbed up the ladder to the throne of medical power. Even while still at college, his experiments often led to his fellow students do go into deep depression, misuse drugs and alcohol to escape the grim thoughts and self doubt Lucian has planted there, until it led to an irreparable state where they would be completely be consumed by the substances to make their mental suffering bearable.

Once when his education was over and he was given a job at one highly respectable psychiatric hospital, did his true experiments begin. He selected his patients carefully, only taking the ones he considered worthy of his time, no matter that he is leading them to their death. Lucian liked to play with them as much as possible, bask into the painful process of mental healing, or at least, they thought they were being cured. Once he broke them, his twisted designs of mental torture drove them all to commit suicide. Since the events were occurring more and more, the other doctors in the hospital became suspicious, but due to lack of evidence he could not be charged for nothing, just fired.

However, that did not prevent him to continue his sick games. Since he was a wealthy man, he opened his own private practice, doing the same thing over and over again. Also, in his free time, he would choose women that he deceived to join him for delightful kinky nights, covering his true intentions with the thick curtain of BDSM, when instead, he was once more paving the path to hell for his subjects.

[lilydalexf]

Old School X is a project interviewing X-Files fanfic authors who were posting fic during the original run of the show. New interviews are posted every Tuesday.

Interview with Rachel Nobel / Rae Lynn

Rachel Nobel, aka Rae Lynn, has 2 fics at Gossamer, but she’s written many more X-Files stories than that. You can also find fics by her at AO3 and various other archives. She’s one of the rare, special authors who’s posted numerous fic during the show’s original run and again in recent years. Big thanks to Rachel for doing this interview.

Does it surprise you that people are still interested in reading your X-Files fanfics and others that were posted during the original run of the show (1993-2002)? Absolutely. I joined a Facebook group for fanfic writers where someone recognized my name and asked about some of my stories that have disappeared from the Internet, and I almost fell off my chair. On the other hand, I go back and read original-run fanfic all the time - the Wayback Machine is my best friend for all the late great fanfic archives. Like fine wines, they get better with age! What do you think of when you think about your X-Files fandom experience? What did you take away from it? I was fairly young during the peak of the fandom - I was only 12 when I started watching the show and discovered the fandom online. A few years ago, right around the time we learned the revival was coming, I wrote an essay I called "How 'The X-Files' defined my adolescence," in which I wrote: "If you think about it, 'The X-Files' is a lot like adolescence: You start out thinking it's going to be a little hokey, NBD, and then you end up in its thrall, captivated and occasionally hugely let down. A lot of people behave strangely, and no one gets out unscathed. Mulder, in his own weird way, is the perfect mirror for an adolescent: He doesn't fit in; his life careens between being utterly consequential to the fate of the known universe and being completely pointless; he's socially awkward and can't quite nail it down with the girl of his dreams."

So for me, the fandom is inextricably bound up with adolescence, that feeling of vacillating between desperate loneliness and being on the verge of something enormously significant. Take romance: I was a bit of a late bloomer, and when all my friends were exploring their first relationships I was watching Mulder and Scully navigate this beautiful, complicated, soulful relationship without ever even kissing. That was deeply affecting for me as a teen.

Social media didn't really exist during the show's original run. How were you most involved with the X-Files online (atxc, message board, email mailing list, etc.)? I started out on mailing lists - there was an EMXC mailing list and one that I think was called X-Angst. [Lilydale note: There was a mailing list called XAngst Anonymous.] This was back at the dawn of the Internet when I only had 10 hours of AOL access a month, and I remember using what AOL called a "FlashSession" to log on, download all the fanfic from the mailing list and log off to read it. I vividly remember the excitement of watching all that new fanfic flood my inbox! Later on I was on atxc. During the long summer between "Gethsemane" and "Redux," it felt like fanfic was at its peak. There was a group of about a dozen women who got together (virtually) to discuss a work in progress by Lydia Bower called "Primal Sympathy." We called ourselves the "Primal Screamers," and we had our own website with fanfic recommendations and other discussions (it cracked me up to locate us as an entry on Fanlore.org). I was still in high school at the time and I was the youngest member; I felt like I had been accepted into a cool underground club. I worshipped these women, who were fanfic writers themselves. They taught me everything I knew about how to be a decent, respectful, enthusiastic consumer and writer of fanfic and fandom. [Lilydale note: I’ve talked enthusiastically about the Primal Screamers here before, including their fanfic primer.] What did you take away from your experience with X-Files fic or with the fandom in general? In the '90s, I would have been embarrassed to tell anyone I read fanfic, let alone that I was writing it. Now, I look back on it and realize how talented and smart and passionate we all were. It's something to be proud of. What was it that got you hooked on the X-Files as a show? The first episode I ever saw was "Shadows," which was on in reruns between the second and third seasons. I don't think "Shadows" is an episode that anyone today would consider thematically significant, but something about seeing those office supplies float spookily through the air - it wasn't like anything I had seen on television, and I wanted in. What got you involved with X-Files fanfic? I've always been a person who, when I am interested in something, seeks to learn more about it. So I guess I got online as a 12-year-old with this new interest and discovered fanfic. It was thrilling to find out that so many talented people were taking characters I loved and bringing them to life for me. When the screen faded to black each week and I wondered, "That's it? What next?", fanfic was always there to fill in the blanks and take Mulder and Scully to the next level. As a teenager, I was self-indulgent enough to think I had something to contribute, too. Most of what I wrote in the '90s would today make me cringe. I remember literally paging through the dictionary in search of erudite words I thought Mulder and Scully would say! But occasionally I'll feel brave enough to read an old story and I feel encouraged to see a spark: a turn of phrase or a fragment of dialogue that I still feel proud of. I write professionally now, but I've never written fiction that isn't X-Files fiction, so it's something that has really allowed me to hone my creative juices in a different way. What is your relationship like now to X-Files fandom? Sometimes I feel like the Statler and Waldorf of the fandom, like I'm sitting up in the balcony grousing "Back in my day...!" Because the fandom is remarkably robust, and I've gotten involved with it to an extent on Twitter and AO3, and now all these young whippersnappers idolize Mulder and Scully just as much if not more as I ever did! Were you involved with any fandoms after the X-Files? If so, what was it like compared to X-Files? Not really, no. I've of course consumed a lot of media since The X-Files that I wanted to discuss with others - I'm a huge "Harry Potter" nerd, and I was outraged when Netflix canceled "The OA" - but strangely I've never had the urge to read or write fanfic about anything other than "The X-Files." Do you ever still watch The X-Files or think about Mulder and Scully? Every Thursday night! I watch a chosen episode with a group of fans on Twitter and tweet about it - #tbtXFiles. That's great fun. There are episodes I've seen dozens of times over the years and episodes I think I only ever watched once, and it's always enlightening to watch them again with a certain critical eye. When I was a fan during the original run, I really idolized Mulder; I loved episodes where we saw him in all his cracked genius glory. Scully was a trailblazer of a character, of course, but I think the fandom has evolved over the years to give Scully her due. Do you ever still read X-Files fic? Fic in another fandom? I was fairly stunned when the revival came around and I realized that people were still writing X-Files fic, and that a lot of it was so good. So yes, I do read fic on Archive of Our Own. But my heart is always with the early days of fanfic. In the revival when Mulder says "I've always wondered how this was going to end" - that felt to me almost like a love letter to fanfic authors who had been trying to answer that question for 25 years. Surprisingly, I've never had the urge to read fic in another fandom. Every time I try, it just feels like I'm cheating on Mulder and Scully. Do you have any favorite X-Files fanfic stories or authors? My favorite author back in the day was Kipler. Her stories were just like real episodes of the show I could vividly imagine in my mind. I adore syntax6, particularly "20" and "The Birthday Stories," because of the way she perfectly and poignantly captures vignettes that span the entire series. Another favorite is Dawn and her "Blood Ties" series - I started out as a "NoRomo," and Dawn was one of the authors who made me believe Mulder and Scully could have a romantic relationship that really worked. And I always had a soft spot for Profiler!Mulder stories, so to this day I mourn the unfinished state of the great Kronos fic "Ascent to Hell." One fic I always come back to that captures profiling Mulder really well is "Domination of Lies," by cslatton. And then there are stories that I consider classics: "Corpse" by Livengoo, "Oklahoma" by Amperage and Livengoo, the "Revelations" and "All Hallow's Eve" series by Windsinger. What is your favorite of your own fics, X-Files and/or otherwise? I have a soft spot for a story I wrote called "Human Credential." I was attempting, a quarter-century after the first season of the show, to set a story in the very early days of the partnership (which these days is one of my favorite kinds of fanfic to read), and I felt like I nailed it. Do you think you'll ever write another X-Files story? Or dust off and post an oldie that for whatever reason never made it online? I have been doing both of these, as a matter of fact! Or in my case, they are oldies that made it online but vanished when Geocities went belly-up, for example, that I sometimes go back to and reshape. Do you still write fic now? Or other creative work? As the swallows return to Capistrano, I seem to always return to writing fic at periods of transition in my life. The first time I "retired" from fanfic, I wasn't even in college yet! If one can be nostalgic at 21 years old for something one gave up at 17, I was nostalgic for fanfic, and I picked it back up again in grad school. Then I became a teacher and a wife and a mom and years passed, and the revival seduced me back into it again. But the vast majority of fanfic I've written is firmly planted in the first seven seasons of the show - poor Mulder and Scully never seem to get to grow up in my stories. What's the story behind your pen name? I wrote under a lot of pen names over the years! When I first started writing fanfic, no one knew anything about Internet safety and it didn't occur to me that it wasn't wise to use my real name. There was a period when I would have been mortified if anyone discovered my stories under my real name - now, at least I can write it off as a youthful indulgence! When I finally grew into a more mature writer, I started using the name Rae Lynn, which is almost-but-not-quite my real first and middle names. Do your friends and family know about your fic and, if so, what have been their reactions? As far as I know, unless my friends and acquaintances have done some sleuthing, only my husband knows I still write fanfic. And he's never read it, though he's kind enough to give me a glazed-eyes indulgent smile if I ever talk about it. Is there a place online (tumblr, twitter, AO3, etc.) where people can find you and/or your stories now? I am xraelynn on AO3! I have about a dozen stories there - some of them I wrote 15 years ago and some of them are brand spanking new. Is there anything else you'd like to share with fans of X-Files fic?

Fanfic is a true labor of love. Fanfic authors don't write fanfic for money or fame; they do it because they love it. Sites like AO3 and Tumblr have made it so much easier to show your appreciation to writers (::gruff reminiscing voice:: back in my day, you had to send them an email, and now you can just click the "kudos" button!). I can only speak for myself, but I really thrive on that feedback - otherwise I'm just Mulder in his cramped hovel of a home office waiting for Scully to nag me to shave my beard. Every so often I think about the fact that there is so much high-quality writing about these characters I've loved for decades just available on the Internet for free and it feels like a true gift.

(Posted by Lilydale on May 4, 2021)

[grandhotelabyss]

—Andrew Hoberek, Considering Watchmen: Poetics, Property, Politics (2014)

This sophisticated critique is not only the institutional left’s reading of Watchmen, it’s the institutional left’s reading of all the vital literary work from, let’s say, May 1968 to September 2001, the so-called postmodern period. (Walter Benn Michaels is the locus classicus.) Periodizing is inherently leveling: figures as distinct as Spenser, Marlowe, and Shakespeare come to seem equally “Elizabethan” somehow, the way writers like Emerson or Thoreau or even Douglass, who might have spit at the sound of Jackson’s name, come in retrospect to typify Jacksonian individualism. So too does Alan Moore sound in the end like his arch-nemesis Margaret Thatcher, and other critics of the late 20th century have likewise found even Toni Morrison and Thomas Pynchon distinctly Reaganesque. 

I criticize the critics, but I’ve made the same charge. It’s the easiest thing in the world to show how the “non-communist left” (phrase courtesy of our friends in Langley) isn’t communist. It does leave this left at a slight disadvantage, as witness the meagerness of Pynchon’s counterforce at the end of Gravity’s Rainbow—not a lot better than a Dickens denouement, with a small, good, familial community subsisting in the interstices of a still-corrupt, still-oppressive society, just the way, come to think of it, that Beloved ends too. 

Yet the critique ultimately fails, and not only because mere intellection is always washed away by creative works as powerful as Beloved, Watchmen, and Gravity’s Rainbow. 

First, why conflate neoliberalism’s sale pitch with its reality? Like any fraudulent ideology, it preys on legitimate values and real hopes. Neoliberals were entirely right to object to totalizing centralized systems that traduced both the individual and the smaller-scale and more organic community, the same way that communists were right to assail the industrial machinery that sometimes literally crushed the working class. But neoliberals, like communists before them, exploited these justifiable concerns to erect their own crushing and totalizing system, in this case, global corporate control. This doesn’t mean that global corporate control is the ultimate political content of late-20th-century novels sufficiently chastened by mid-20th-century totalitarianism to hesitate before suggesting newly absolute systems as the answer to extant systems’ failures. There are excellent reasons, as well as dubious ones, not to be a communist. 

Second, there is the reliable misfit between art and institution, no matter the ideology of either institution or artist. Art takes shape under the creator’s hand even as the hand shapes it, an ungovernable mix of the rational and the intuitive. An artistic genius is not an especially commanding individual, someone uniquely able to realize an overwhelming intention, but rather a person supremely open to influence by ambient currents, an Aeolian harp. The institution, however, knows only rules and procedures, and judges spontaneity a threat. This is not some bias of the crypto-neoliberal hippie, but the actual difference between two situations: free individual or communal creation and procedural social maintenance. 

Watchmen illustrates this schism better than most works given its clockwork formalist structure, meant by Moore to signal comics’ aesthetic seriousness to legitimating authorities, therefore art’s own internal institutionalization of one of its possibilities as governing procedure. These structural gears are abraded by the vagina dentata that erupts at the narrative’s climax, a figuration not for nature-as-fatal-woman, as I’d mistakenly assumed in my earlier readings, but rather for a rival artwork, the neoliberal leftist Ozymandias’s harnessing of wild aesthetic chaos to his own excessively systemic political end. Watchmen, therefore, its own form too cold, its climactic content (not to mention the bloodletting throughout) too hot, and both in service to power, incorporates a two-sided autocritique of irrational art’s assimilation to rational authority, of the institution’s desire to manipulate for its own end what seems its absolute exterior, even if that institution is art itself. Yet what one remembers from the book, what I remember anyway, are the looks on the characters’ faces and the work’s whole tone, emergent from but irreducible to its structure.

So the institutions batten on art, complaining all the while that it’s too anti-social, not a good fit, in violation of protocol. Fine for the rest of us, who are not looking for utopia’s floor-plan and HR handbook but only images, however fleeting, of intensity or beauty, transcendence or grace.

Further reading: essays from me on Watchmen, Beloved, and Gravity’s Rainbow.

[softer-ua]

Two Left Feet, And One In The Mouth

Pt. 1

Lying there catching his breath seething Katsuki became suddenly aware of the feeling of melting iceberg quickly soaking his back, every drop replacing his already spread thin patients

Katsuki knew he need to hurry up and fix things with Deku, that he should go change into the spare clothes he kept in his office, that he had a much better chance of winning Deku over if he played nice with his friends, and he knew Shoto was only turning his hoodie into a impromptu sponge to piss him off and distract him from actually accomplishing any of that.

He also knew that it was fucken working.

Jumping up he felt his hoodie’s new weight pulling on him, the bastard had soaked him all the way through and the hoodie's fluffy inside was only making it worse, gross dirty floor water was fast spreading all the way down his pants and even through to his front.

Kasuki was seeing red, the only thought in his head was a vision of the Icyhot bastards head on a pike.

And that's how 15 minutes later he found himself standing in the meeting room sporting a few new bruises and dripping a puddle onto the floor, as he argued with ‘Lightning Mcqueen in glasses’ that he shouldn’t have to take the sole blame for ‘blowing up half the lobby’ or the charring on the lower branches of the lobby’s new ‘just set up yesterday, took all day to decorate, Sato ate half a snickers cheesecake just to get it in here, Tamaki and Ochako were so excited to put the star on, blah blah blah’ Christmas tree.

Those were clearly fire singe marks, not explosive blowback, and he told Mirio as much as he turned to blatantly ignore Iida. He also told him it was absolutely bullshit they had a tree up in the first week of fucken November!

Katsuki didn’t care to admit most of this blustering was to avoid admitting the main reason ‘a little bit of water set off a top ranking pro’ was because his brand Fucken new, curently one of a fucken kind, limited edition Hero Deku tee was hidden under his hoodie.

It was supposed to be part of the nerds Christmas present. His dad had just given it to him last night for a trial wear before they made the actual order to have enough made in time to be advertised and auctioned off to raise funds for the nerds favorite holiday charities.

Katsuki had planned to show up to dance practice in it after patrol and then do some photos together to boost the word about the dance and the auction.

Now not only was Deku not talking to him, but if he showed Deku this gross wrinkled mess he’d probably never speak to him again. Today officially sucked and all because ChargeDolt and RedRot couldn’t keep their fucken mouths shut... and some other things that were definitely not his fault either.

Eventually Mirio and Iida seem to tire themselves out and let the group go with a warning to expect their already packed schedules to be slammed with several hours of community service and outreach.

And of course Mirio asked Katsuki had to hang back because the universe hated him today. And of course he was given some more bad news because why would anything ever be easy?

Deku had been switched to evening patrol for today with Tokoyami, and Amajiki had agreed to take his place for the first half of the morning and Uraraka would join him after lunch

Katsuki wanted to bitch that they couldn’t reschedule because they had stupid dance practice, but between Deku not wanting to talk to him, no ‘don’t stay mad at me’ surprise, not wanting to explain to Deku what happened to the lobby, and not even a half baked explanation or apology in mind for why he said what he did Katsuki just grunted his acknowledgement and went to change into his costume. If anything he was getting off easier like this. At least Amajiki was on of the few extras he could stand.

_______________________________________________

If Mirios plan for punishment was to guilt him to the core by saddling him with a semi sulking SunEater, then he was an evil genius. Cause it was working, Katsuki hadn’t felt this all around ashamed since.… well probably only like a year but still.

Amajiki was one of the few people who Katsuki actually respected as a hero and a person, not only did the fellow pro have a kick ass quirk that he used creatively but Katsuki had grown to (begrudgingly) admire the hero for how up front he was with his anxiety and how hard he worked through it. It kinda reminded him of Deku and his oddballness and how the nerd used it to his advantage to become the symbol of hope.

Katsuki had been expecting a half mumbled lecture and a maybe even prodding about therapy. The nervous nellies' unusually strong(for them) vendetta with the hero world was it's slacking in mental healthcare or whatever.

So after struggling through about four hours of sullen silence, (that was also infuriatingly familiar, apparently heroing wasn’t all the nerd had learn from his senpais), Katsuki snapped with a screech like an overly taunt fiddle string.

“I’m sorry about the fucken tree! If it’s not replaced by the time we get back I’ll do it my goddamn self, happy?!” Katsuki had been expecting Tamki to give a quiet nod or retreat into himself more, depending on how he took his offer. He definitely didn’t expect to be glared at

“You think I’m upset about the tree?” Amajiki tilted his head in confusion. Maybe they should talk about Katsuki seeing the team's therapist more. Monthly was the minimum everyone on the newly forged Heros Union of Honor had to attend but Katsuki was clearly needing more support right now. Maybe it was the holidays? A good portion of them were going biweekly now for that reason.

HUH was more than an agency. It was a newly emerging code of ethics board. You were expected to be worth the honor of being called a hero when partnered with HUH, and that meant getting your mental health to its peak was a priority.

That didn’t mean everyone (or really anyone) was perfectly mentally fit, just that mental health was a priority. Other agencies had taken notice of how differently they operated even within their first year, and since then a few had even sent their heroes through the HUH program to learn how to operate more like them. They were quickly taking up the void the Hero's Commission had left.

“I’m not upset about the tree, I’m upset because you hurt my friends and fellow hero partners-“ Amajiki was rudely cut off as he caught a gauntlet to the chest, thank god they’d gotten smaller over the years.

“He’s your business partner, he’s MY hero partner, has been since before we agreed to join this agency.” Katsuki thundered.

Why everyone on the board had to call each other partners was something Katsuki didn’t understand, but he refused to let them slip up and start tossing around the phrase Hero Partner. They were all business partners,something anyone could become. A Hero Partner was a major commitment, and Katsuki had the signed legal waivers to prove it.

Amajiki stopped and looked at Katsuki fully, really taking in his teammates' rattled appearance.

Katsuki had been doing well, dare say even flourishing within HUH, so today’s outbreak was nearly out of character at this point and still Katsuki didn’t appear to be calming down any. If anything he was only growing more tightly wound.

Yes, Amajiki was upset with Katsuki but he’d remained silent during their patrol more so the blonde could have some time to think, but it didn’t seem to have done him any good. Amajiki fought through the nervousness that crawled under his skin and begged him to just let the explosive guy be.

Mirio had asked him to talk with Katsuki, under some false impression that Katsuki respected him more, but before this moment he’d figured it was better to not butt in. He hadn’t been around when this morning’s incident happened but he could see another one brewing.

Amajiki shuffled side to side for a second considering his options. He could just send Katsuki home early, even put him on leave until he got cleared by the teams therapist. Or he could do what Mirio suggested and reach out to a struggling teammate.

Therapy was good, but therapy with a support network was better.

“GroundZero, let’s take lunch. I think we need to have a talk-“ Amajiki put up a slightly trembling hand to silence the blonde. Straightening his back and furthering his resolve he pushed forward. “-This isn’t really optional, we neeeed to have a talk, and about more than this morning's incident. I wanna talk about your hero partner.”

Katsuki’s argument died on his tongue.  He shoved his hands in his pockets with a grunt and jerked his head to signal to Amajiki to take the lead.

Katsuki knew he wasn’t gonna like what came next but he tried to reminded himself that he trusted and respected Amajiki, and that meant hearing him out when asked. It’s what Deku would do, so it’s what Katsuki would try to do.

[ohlayarfp]

Film Review - Misteri Dilaila by Syafiq Yusof

Misteri Dilaila is a Malaysian horror thriller film that went viral in 2019. I rarely watch Malaysian films because when i do, it’s usually the same plot all over again. Drama, romance, action, comedy and everyone’s favourite, Horror. I feel like these genres are the usuals everywhere but what makes it unbearable for most of us Malaysians is how similar every story is. Rich boy meets a poor girl. Rich boy falls in love with her and when they get married the mother hates the poor girl. They fight and one day someone dies and the end. For horror, it’s just about some people getting haunted by a ghost that was sent by a close friend of theirs.

The thing I understand about the horror hype for Malaysians is how our culture is deeply rooted with mystical beliefs and as religious as we tend to be, ghost stories seem to intertwine with our faith for countless years. Personally, I believe in Asian ghosts more than the western versions. This is probably due to my own family having our fair share of sights into the world of the undead. 

The reason why I chose to talk about this film is because of how disappointed I felt when I watched it. Unlike most Malaysian films, it had the potential to be a great one. The look of the film was far better than the usual ones we got and the story building had a Gone Girl vibe. What made me disappointed was the fact that while watching that film I was hopeful and excited thinking finally a Malaysian Filmmaker is making a psychological horror instead of those in your face jump scares. 

The story is about a married couple, Jefri and Dilaila, who were spending their holiday together at a luxury vacation home in Fraser’s Hill. After a petty issue where they end up quarrelling at each other, Jefri discovers his wife went missing the following morning. Next thing he knows, a mysterious woman who also goes by the name of Dilaila shows up one night where she claims to be his wife. Adding more confusion is the supernatural occurrences that regularly haunts Jefri whenever he’s alone in the house.

Throughout the whole film, I was at the edge of my seat thinking that there’s finally a malaysian filmmaker that is about to introduce a character with a mental illness as the protagonist which would’ve justified his hallucinations of the ghost. Unfortunately, it was just like other films where there’s no actual context to the sightings, they were just ghosts being ghosts and haunting him for no reason. Well that’s for the 2nd version of the film.

Another fun fact about this film is that it went viral due to the alternate endings it has. When the film came out in the cinemas, people were surprised to hear that they had different endings when they discussed it with their friends. This was purely the filmmaker and his team’s intention. Different halls have different endings and this was meant to be a surprise for the audiences. It was a great marketing strategy and considered as a genius way of thinking for some people while some were mad that they were being ripped off. 

*SPOILERS AHEAD*

As a person that watched both versions, I was unsatisfied with both versions as both endings angered me. Nevertheless, I didn’t think it’s an absolute flop though. Both versions have the fair share of plot twists. The first version revealed that the protagonist we thought all along was the actual antagonist. He was the one that killed his own wife whilst every supporting character was a part of the police team that were acting to make him confess to his wrong doings. It was then stated that the hallucinations he got was a result of his guilt and him being under the influence of drugs all along.

The second version on the other hand is more mystical. The ghosts made more appearances in this version. The protagonist is still the good guy but the inspector that was involved in the case turned out to be a fake policeman and he was working with the imposter Dilaila. Towards the end, Jef found out that his wife has been dead a long time ago and the ‘wife’ he was holding turns out to be something else (this we never see on screen though). 

Personally if i were to choose an ending, I would choose the 1st version as it makes more sense logically but I can understand why people love the 2nd Version.  Malaysians and their thirst for horror films explains the statistics. But a famous film reviewer on YouTube (ZhafVlogs) once made an instagram poll and asked his subscribers to choose between the two versions and surprisingly it was a tie. This proves that the director made the right decision to come up with alternate endings. 

*END OF SPOILERS*

The film then landed in a controversy within the next few weeks after the premiere. Someone noticed that the story was awfully familiar. It was then proven that the story was 90% similar to a few films from India, America, Russia and more. People were comparing it to a film called “Vanishing Act” and they were right. 

As a film student, I am aware about the concept of adaptation so I personally see no wrong in the filmmaker’s act. However, I can understand why people are mad. The filmmaker went silent once news got out about him “stealing” the idea and “claiming” the story as his. But based on my research, I never found him claiming the story as his before. Although, he also never mentioned about him making a remake of the initial film as well. The filmmaker went silent for a long time and people kept sending him hate comments but soon died after a few months. 

A year later, the issue was raised yet again by someone and this caused the filmmaker to finally speak up. He explains the concept of adaptation and how he was inspired by a scriptwriting book called Save The Cat which said that “A good artist copy, but a great artist steals”. He also states about there being so many films abroad that have the similar concept to an older film such as Fast and Furious with Point Break, Avatar with Pocahontas and Inception with Paprika. He finally came clean and stated that he was inspired by a stage play from France called “A Trap for a Lonely Man”. He then added his own twist by adding some horror elements knowing that it being the target audience favourite genre.

Also regarding the quote from Save The Cat, (in my opinion) I feel like what the author was implying is about ‘stealing’ stories from life. Not stealing the exact plot codes from other films. This is based on my understanding from the phrase which I assume Syafiq may have misinterpreted it.

He raised logical points from a filmmaker’s perspective and he also raised some issues about being pressured from his father (Yusof Haslam) and brother (Syamsul Yusof) who were well known filmmakers as well. He said that everyone kept on telling him to be better than his father and brother. Sadly, when he was at his lowest, even his family turned their backs on him and said that it’s fully his fault. 

From my point of view, I was initially furious with him for not being able to defend himself by explaining about the adaptation because I feel like most Malaysian audiences are unaware about it. People assume adaptation is from book to film when it's more than that. I, myself, learnt that from film school. And I’m not entirely defending him as well, I’m still disappointed in him for not speaking up sooner. But I do empathise with him as well. The audience were quick to attack him. The film industry in Malaysia is not entirely in the best state for these past few years. So a film like Misteri Dilaila made everyone hopeful for more quality films like it only to be betrayed at the end when they found out that it wasn’t his own creative idea and a total rip off. I still feel like he did a good job with his visuals which was an improvement from the local films around that time.

Reading through the whole issue and looking at how this decision to “copy” the plot codes as he was inspired from the Save The Cat book has opened my eyes. As a filmmaker, I feel like i should always do research before starting on a project and the best thing is to always be honest with our intentions. If it’s inspired by a remake, then set it straight and give credit to the original piece. Don’t keep it to yourself. It is terrifying though, being in his state where everyone turned their backs on him, even his own family. He released a few films after that, saying that film is his job and that it is his source of income so as much as it may seem hard sometimes, life still goes on. Sadly, he received a lot of backlash and people lost their faith in him. People were being sarcastic and teasing him if the film was even his.Seeing that happened to him opened my eyes. People may let it slide but they’ll never forget. Once you screw up, people will remember and use it against you. 

Pictures of the set:

Links to Film Reviews:

A Non-Horror Fan's Guide To Watching 'Misteri Dilaila'

https://rojakdaily.com/entertainment/article/6414/a-non-horror-fan-s-guide-to-watching-misteri-dilaila

Misteri Dilaila (2019) Review

https://www.caseymoviemania.com/2019/02/misteri-dilaila-2019-review/

Movie review: Misteri Dilaila

https://www.thesundaily.my/style-life/reviews/movie-review-misteri-dilaila-DJ649603

Link to news about the controversy :

Is Local Horror Film ‘Misteri Dilaila’ a Rip Off? Here’s What The Director Had To Say..

https://juiceonline.com/is-local-horror-film-misteri-dilaila-a-rip-off-heres-what-the-director-had-to-say/

Horror fans slam ‘Misteri Dilaila’ for ripping off Hollywood film ‘Vanishing Act’

https://www.malaymail.com/news/showbiz/2019/03/05/horror-fans-slam-misteri-dilaila-for-ripping-off-hollywood-film-vanishing-a/1729154

Clarification/Statement by the Director about the issue (in Malay);

https://www.facebook.com/photo?fbid=649749852534594&set=pcb.649750949201151

[engineering-robotics]

Shout Out List

The world is insane and always has been but, we need many doses of good things! So here goes, eh?

@kychchc - I remember this lovely around the first two years I created this blog but, she was under a different username back then! Their Scarlet is well written, relatable, beautiful, strong and a fleshed out character with great care given to them. The mun is also A++ and a good person who is loads fun to speak with.

@sadistic-second - There will be many Renos on this list but, starting off lemme give love to this one here. Snarky, fun, funny and well ...downright sadistic! Reno is a character that takes certain panache and panache they've got! I've seen them do some lengthy and plot driven threads that are incredible to read. The mun is cool af and really chill to talk to.

@fastest-turk - Another Reno that is written well and how you would expect Reno to be. Snappy comebacks, funny dialogue with a dose of needed seriousness where it counts. You can be assured that you will have fun getting into hijinxs with this one! The mun is also basically Reno but, university bound Reno but, also a chick. A really cool ass chick.

@ask-the-red-haired-turk - Now I'll admit I haven't hung out with this Reno much but, we have interacted and they are super cool. The common thread between all of these Renos are how the muns seem to seamlessly write this nutty redhead with hardly an issue. In character, that very Reno swagger and turn of phrase we all know and love. They got it. And just like the other two the mun is great to plot with and in general chat with. They're good people.

@finalhxaven - I have (in my memory) only recently interacted at any great length with this Tifa but, so far I am having so much fun! The sweet, kind, generous, ass kicking, will make-you-say-sorry-in-three-seconds-or-you-will-have-bruises Tifa Lockhart. I can tell this will be a fun ride and do get a chance to meet the mun; they're a cutie.

@ivory-paragon - The only Rufus I have personally interacted with. Holy mother of Sephiroth they're so good!! This, this is Rufus Shinra and you cannot convince me otherwise. From the expression, the manner of speaking, the intricacies of his mind; everything is written as such that you must be sure Rufus is writing out little novellas about his life. The mun is a great guy, smart and witty just like his character.

@xnotamemoryx - So, Sephiroth is a great villain to many yes? Yes. My friend here is an absolute genius when it comes to writing for amoral characters like you would not believe. I know they have not had the chance to do too much on here but, when the time comes around they will not disappoint. Mun has been my friend for a little over a decade now and I can vouch for them!

@exsiliumductoris - Veld! (They also have good side RP blogs. Check em out!) I love Veld, we should all appreciate Veld for what he is. They write the venerated grumpy Turk with the kind of dead pan, I'm too old for this gruffness you would expect. Even though we all are aware that Veld is actually capable of being nice. Also, the mun. They are great to even just shoot the breeze with outside of fandom talk!

@rude-at-your-service - Rude, basically. The writing for Rude is spot on with how he carries himself, how he sees his job and the people around said job. He's great because there is a level of humor there that feels subtle to me and especially with how he manages to deal with Reeve's antics. The mun is this cool polyglot who is friendly and kind.

@driftingjazzbard - Non FF but, not a problem! A multifaceted, well written, thought out proper, sassy, empathetic, intelligent OC who is a traveling musician. Erin is a character who can be written into many fantasy themed fandoms with nary a hitch due to the mun's undeniable creativity. Ah yes, speaking of the mun you should really get to know her! She is just as multifaceted and knowledgeable as her muse!

[totally-incorrect-theatre-quotes]

Triangle Cult (fanfic)

Remember when I gave you guys options to vote on for what fanfic I write next? Yeah so anyway I found a really funny text post by @sidras-tak and with their permission, I wrote this little short blurb. I apologize for the lack of angst and sadness that usually accompany my fanfictions lol

Fourth-period math was perhaps the worst hour of the day for Lydia. It was right before she had lunch, and right after her European history class where the lessons were so dull that she would often struggle to stay awake. She slumped into her desk, fiddling with the collar of her uniform shirt and wishing she had opted to wear pants that day instead of a skirt. She hadn’t expected winter to come quite as quickly as it had, she was no stranger to the cold having grown up in New York, but her old school didn’t require uniforms. Glancing around at her desk mates she noticed that had all gotten the memo, one kid was slouched back with his hands shoved in his pocket in a futile attempt to keep them warm.

Lydia’s geometry teacher thought that the way traditional classrooms were set up stifled student’s ability to maximize their brainpower, so instead of lined up rows they were in four circles of five desks so that their energies could bounce off each other and better solve the problems. Lydia’s first reaction was that Ms. Glick would love Delia, but her second reaction was dread, fearing she wouldn’t get along with anyone that she was going to be partnered with. She lucked out as thankfully the other four people were either indifferent to Lydia completely or were even friendly to her. However, they all bonded over their mutual distaste for how Ms. Glick taught geometry. To them, it was all just a bunch of numbers but to the teacher it was art. Lydia felt bad teasing the teacher in her new friend group because she felt the same way about chemistry that Ms. Glick felt about math, but the minute Ms. Glick went on a fifteen-minute rant about how triangles aren’t physical things but rather a concept and a set standard and evidence of humans capability to comprehend things that don’t exist she lost any restraint. Within fifteen minutes there was a group chat named Triangle Cult and the five of them became fast friends. 

Today’s lesson was particularly excruciating, they were going over algebraic postulates, something they had already learned the previous year in algebra I, and every other sentence out of her mouth was either “Interesting right?” or “Bet ya didn’t know that!”. Lydia could feel years being taken off of her life every time those phrases passed the teacher’s lips but she impressively made it about seventeen minutes into the lesson before she felt like she was going to implode. She nudged classmate on the shoulder and muttered, “If she says ‘Interesting right?’ one more time I’m going to summon a demon and throw her to the sandworms.”

Unfortunately, her fellow student was hardly paying attention, having already lost his sanity and desire to pay attention a mere forty seconds before Lydia had. Half listening her waved his hand, “Yeah yeah sounds good. You should do it.”

That was all the assurance Lydia needed. She pulled her phone out of her skirt pocket and sent a brief but cryptic text to her favorite demon. It simply stated, “Bout to summon you, I’m thinking triangles.” 

She liked to keep it mysterious, left room for spontaneity which was where BJ often did his best work. It was less than five seconds later when her phone vibrated with the demons affirmation. Lydia took in a deep breath, trying to hide the smirk growing behind her hand as she whispered, “Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice.”

If someone had a stopwatch it took approximately seventeen seconds for all hell to break loose, and while Lydia explicitly forbade the sandworms having only been half-kidding when she lamented to her friend, Beetlejuice still found many creative ways to wreck havoc in the classroom. Lydia was extremely impressed with his interpretation of the triangle theme, however, her teacher was none too thrilled when all the papers in the classroom were turned to paper airplanes flying uncontrollably around the room. It didn’t take a genius to figure out that Lydia had something to do with what was happening, maybe it was the fact that she was nearly purple in the face from laughter while everyone else was either terrified or confused or maybe it was the fact that the green-haired demon in the room started the whole ordeal by shouting, “Check this out Lydia!”

In the middle of all the fun, Ms.Glick walked over to Lydia’s desk and stared at her sternly. 

“Looks like you’re in trouble Lyds.” Beetlejuice teased, Lydia tried to retort but he vanished before she could respond, leaving the room in shambles. 

Explaining the whole situation to the principal was quite the experience, nobody quite understood how the quite honor student somehow managed to summon a demon into her geometry classroom, but after promising to help clean up the mess that was made and given a three-day detention, she was sent back to class. The rest of the school day was amazing in her opinion, word spread pretty quickly about what happened and while Lydia was far from popular she was a hero in school that day, even a group of seniors high-fived her. She had such a great day that she forgot what she was going to be walking into when she went home. 

She walked home from school like she normally did but when she got to the door in dawned on her that for sure everybody in the house knew what happened. She clutched the yellow detention slip tightly in her hands and sheepishly walked in through the door. She was greeted by a fuming Barbara who was tapping her foot impatiently, “You pull a stunt like that again and YOU’LL be the one to never leave this house again, got it?”

Lydia nodded remorsefully and marched up the stairs to her bedroom where she was supposed to spend the rest of the night writing an apology letter to Ms. Glick for summoning a demon to her classroom and causing a disruption in the lesson. She was about two paragraphs into her semi-sarcastic apology when Beetlejuice appeared in her room leaning back on the air in a relaxed position, “Do you regret it, Scarecrow?” 

Lydia wrinkled her nose in a laugh, “Oh absolutely not. Next time I’m thinking-”

“THERE WILL BE NO NEXT TIME YOUNG LADY!” Barbara shouted from the attic

Lydia rolled her eyes and lowered her voice, “Anyway so next time I’m thinking that….”