#because ooooooh scary

[impulsivelycontentious]

I am triggered by mothers day. Annually. It's my shit to work on my peeps. We do not need to cancel mothers' day or keep it out of public places and never again discuss it because someone MIGHT be triggered by it.

Someone might be triggered by dogs, does that mean we ban people with service animals from communal therapy spaces? No. No we don't. We don't even have special dog free ones because THOSE PEOPLE HAVE A RIGHT TO BE THERE.

We can accommodate people more privately who have allergies and phobias, but those people DO NOT have the right to demand others be denied access. We had this talk about 'but what if lesbians make women uncomfortable' a few decades back and before that it was racial. The answer is you work on it. We do not deny access to people who would otherwise be fine being there because someone is uncomfortable. Even extremely so.

Women are not in need of coddling against anyone not confirming to someone's ideal of women's gender expression. Do not be ridiculous.

you know i think i’ve come to the conclusion that the answer to “but what if a cis woman is traumatized by men/male presenting people/whatever?” irt safe spaces is this: if you can’t be in the same room with someone you assume to be male or a man without feeling triggered, it probably means you have a lot more solo therapy and healing to do before relying on group therapy or other communal healing.

because how do you decide who gets to stay and who gets kicked out based on a cis woman’s trauma response? is it based on appearance? should intersex women with facial hair not be allowed because beards are triggering? should butches and studs not be allowed because masculinity is triggering? should talk broad shouldered trans women who don’t want to voice train not be allowed because low voices are triggering? is it based on identity? should a pre transition trans man who came out two days ago not be allowed because he’s a man? is a nonbinary person with a full beard and deep voice allowed because they are not a man?

because if you base your entire set of rules for who’s not allowed in the safe space on what makes cis women uncomfortable or triggers them, you’ve just made that space unsafe for trans people. and you need to decide if you’re ready to own that.

[quitedisastrous]

my mom told me i almost got diagnosed with autism as a kid (she says i wasn't officially diagnosed because the diagnosis wouldn't have been useful so i guess my symptoms were so on the fence that they didn't push for it) which. like i'm 100% sure i have autism but holy mackerel. she couldn't have told me this as a kid???? it's a good thing i'm both logical and oblivious so i didn't spend too much time thinking "something is wrong with me. what the fuck is wrong with me" but like. what the fuck?

[chosoisamalewife]

Loved the Sukuna post. Now... Hear me out...

Bottom Sukuna..

male reader..

some nsfw and sfw hcs

Bottom!Sukuna x Male reader

A/N : ANON I LOVE YOUR BRAIN (the sfw is just more domestic headcanons, I love making big scary mean men domesticated 😁😁😏😏)

A/N : I might have been listening to flesh by Simon Curtis while cooking up the nsfw part

WARNINGS : OOC!Sukuna / Power bottom!Sukuna / Top!reader / a lot of kinky shit / mentions slapping / choking / knife knife / blood play

This man will not show an ounce of submission in public

However remember when I said he loves for you to trace the marks on him. When he is super relaxed a slight pur can be heard. (I HEAD CANON THAT HE PURRS JUST HEAR ME OUT PLEASE. I BEGGING YOU)

However it's not loud and can only be heard when he speaks but you can feel it. Low rumbles in his chest

If you have any hobbies he would act so uninterested but he is full of shit

He would slyly ask about them and take note of them

Only trusts uraume alone with you

Finds everything you watch fucking stupid and boring. He would literally groan anytime you put something on. Would he sit down and watch with you…….yes but will he complain for a bit…..of course he would

Like I said previously he is a pretty good cook but if you are even better than him he would just watch you cook. There is something captivating about you being focused and concentrated. (He will probably get in the mood for some fun 😏)

NSFW

For him to even consider you topping him would take alot of convincing. "You topping me? Do you view me as some type of weakling" He would laugh loudly in your face

Before you get to chance to top him you have to prove to him that you can take him. That you can handle him.

So that means an all night session with him. He will ruin you all night and if you pass then you will get the glorious victory.

Let's just say he was shocked when you succeeded. He tried everything to make you tap out but nothing seem to work.

POWER!BOTTOM

He wants you to FUCK him.

He wants you to treat him like he does you, well at least try to

"Don't go gently with me now. I'm not weak , I can fucking take it"

When you finally gripped his hips and started to pound into him he would let out a manic laugh. It startled you a little bit but you carried on

"There you go fuck me like a strong man"

When he tops you he mostly groans but when you fuck him for the first time he literally growls and grits his teeth

He can not let your hear how good you are making him feel

But you will feel it

Ooooooh lord God help you because he will leave SCRATCHES on your back, anywhere

He will dig his nails into any part of your skin so please have antibiotic ointment on hand. Love watching the blood trickle from were his nails have been. Will lick your blood

DO NOT TEASE HIM OR TIE HIM UP because if you do that just means hell when he tops you again

When I say treat him like he does you, slap him, fuck his throat, overestimate him, choke him, bite him. Everything be ROUGH

AND I MEAN CHOKE HIM, this psychotic mother fucker would smile while his lungs aren’t getting air

Slap his face, thighs, ass everything. He lives for the stings

The only time he would beg you while bottoming is for you to sit on his face or to cum in his throat

Put a knife to his throat as you pound into him, he would think you are the sexiest thing to ever walk the earth

Maybe even cut him a little bit , collect his blood on your fingers and shove them in his mouth 😏😏

CAN LAST ALL NIGHT, you will probably run out of energy before does so could luck

I want to give him the most coma inducing diabolical earth shaking galaxy destroying supernova creating backshots. 🤸‍♂️🤸‍♂️

[mothmanssweetsucculentass]

What are your head cannons for characters in different factions within Zenless being friends? (Example: Lucy and Corin being friends because they have the shared experience of not great parents based on what the game reveals).

Ooooooh I hadn’t thought about this til now—

I’m gonna try and include as many characters as possible in this!!

So first off, everyone in the Cunning Hares gets along with everyone in The Sons of Calydon. Considering Billy used to be a former member of the gang, I’d say the two work pretty closely/know each other fairly well. For specifics, I think Anby and Caesar have the same mindset when it comes to combat, and Nekomata and Burnice bond over being chaos gremlins. Nekomata would also love Piper, nap taking gang go Brrrr. I think the only ones who wouldn’t like each other would be Nicole and Lucy, and they tend to just hate each other in secret/behind everyone else’s back’s cause they care about their own groups too much.

Similarly, I think Belobog also has similar ties to Victoria Housekeeping. Lycaon and Corin both like Ben, but for different reasons. Lycaon likes Ben due to thiren solidarity, and Lycaon also thinks he’s a pretty decent guy who’s chill and all that. If Belobog ever needs a commission from Victoria, or vice versa, the transactions are made between those two.

Corin likes him cause of how gentle and understanding he is. She sees a lot of her new father figure Lycaon in him.

As much as it pains me to say it, I don’t really think anyone in Victoria Housekeeping would like the company of the more criminally aligned factions (so far being the Cunning Hares and Sons of Calydon). Sure, Victoria Housekeeping may not have the greatest moral compass, but they do have a reputation to uphold.

The only one I think does make sense is Corin and Nekomata considering their actions in canon. Maaaaaybeee if you squint, I can see Anby and Ellen getting along, too

Seth being the himbo that he is would definitely befriend Rina on accident. Like, she would just be doing the mind manipulation stuff and being super condescending and shit, and he’d be none the wiser and think her insults to be genuine compliments.

And obviously because of that, I think Rina and Jane would also be besties. Gaslight gatekeep girlboss solidarity.

Lycaon and Qingyi I think would also get along at least somewhat well, considering both are very peepaw coded characters. Lycaon also deems it good to have at least one cop friend for emergencies.

Soldier 11 often works with NEPS, but hasn’t been able to form a close bond with anyone outside of Phaethon due to how insanely busy she always is. She’d definitely like Qingyi the most if given the time to actually hang out with the NEPS faction.

Seth, if ever given the chance, would also probably like Anton’s company. The two have similar moral compasses and even more similar himbo mindsets.

Anton would also love Billy for the same reasons. He has to keep their friendship somewhat hidden though, lest Grace finds out Billy exists and tries to cut him open to see how he works.

Piper seems to be the mechanic of the Sons of Calydon group, so I think she’d get along with at least Koleda and Anton from Belobog. Solidarity in working with big machinery and all that y’know?

Soukaku would definitely be friends with Burnice, no explanation needed. Chaos gremlin x chaos gremlin.

Harumasa and Seth probably have a history together the same way Zhu Yuan and Miyabi do.

Until they reveal more about her, I don’t really know what to say about Yanagi, but I think she’d probably get along with people like Lycaon and Qingyi

I ran into Lighter once in Lumina square and he had dialogue about being kinda shy so y’know what, fuck it, anxious mf solidarity between him and Corin. Let the tall scary looking biker guy have social anxiety and let it be the most normal thing ever please Hoyo I beg do not make him like fucking Mika from genshin

I really hope they officially reveal the idol/livestreamer faction, as well as the vampire guy in Lycaon’s story quest soon, cause I’d love to see how their personalities are, and how they’d fit in with the rest of the cast

[puffyducks]

DCRC Week #24 (Part 1)

Today we're reading PKNA #20: Mekkano AKA Gorthan reads a single line of Shakespeare and has a full Steven Universe moment. Peace and love on the planet Earth and all that.

GUYS LOOK IT'S GORTHAN!!! Remember? From Trauma? I told you guys to remember so if you didn't this one's on you.

Anyways he's about to crash and die a fiery death.

Bro is fighting for his life NOW IS NOT THE TIME TO BE QUOTING THE LITTLE PRINCE!!!!

Oh ok nvm he's self aware

Once again we bear witness to the fact that Donald is so fucking teeny tiny. All it takes is one big fuckig fist to grip his entire head. Manlet.

Idk why this part made me laugh so hard but literally all it took was for him to bitch slap the gun out of PK's hands and it's like Oh. Well shit.

Scolds Uno and Gorthan for saying hi to each other then IMMEDIATELY makes a corny joke that's infinitely more disrespectful than anything they were doing

I found this random technological doohickey that fell from the sky and idk what it does but now I can use it to power my giant scary machine, THIS IS A GREAT IDEA!!!!!

Ooooooh somebody's jealous of the indomitable human spirit oooooh 🫵

BRO HAD MEASLES????

Makes a robot that absorbs things into its body and then gets mad when it. starts absorbing things.

"I hate you as much as you hate me" y'know I'm getting distinct flashbacks to a certain OTHER villain who claims to "hate" PK but still regularly works alongside him and exchanges casual banter... a certain somebody who likes to raid things........

Damn that's deep.... idk how fast the Evronians end wars though you guys are doing a pretty shit job at invading Earth

Oh NOW you think it's bad??? You just watched it rampage through like half the city 😭

YOU GUYS CAN DROP THE "MY ENEMY" THING YOU CLEARLY LIKE EACH OTHER

Wait LOVE??? Ok jumped pretty quick there let me just revise my last sentence - YOU GUYS CAN DROP THE "MY ENEMY" THING YOU CLEARLY LOVE EACH OTHER

It's right behind me isn't it

Ok now that Gorthan got fucking owned and absorbed into a giant metal horror creature IT'S TIME FOR BURTON LA VALLE ohh yeah baby

Uuuuh there's not a lot to say here it's just Burton La Valle beefing with a dog. If this DOG doesn't stop ruining my shots I'm sending his ass to the GLUE FACTORY!!!

Anyways, with the bonus comic out of the way let me just say: I love this story. Insanely lukewarm take, I know, but the conflict between PK and Gorthan here is just SOOOO interesting man. The constant back and forth between whether or not they're enemies, because sure, they SHOULD loathe each other given the circumstances. They constantly reiterate through dialogue that they HATE each other, and yet, through the story we see that both parties hesitate to take any definitive action against the other. PK does a pretty good job of reiterating it himself here:

There's something so interesting about the way in which Gorthan falls in love with humanity through our literature. Every part of his instinctual self tells him to hate us, and yet he just can't. Perhaps it's self-important of us as humans to assume that anything we do could be so moving, but idk. I think it's beautiful to fall in love with humanity through our ability and drive to create. The Evronians don't have the luxury of feeling and creating, they're pretty automatic beings that just kinda exist to follow orders and conquer stuff. It's a pretty fuckin dismal existence, thankfully most of them aren't really conscious enough to think about it critically. I mean Gorthan was but he got immediately kicked out so...

Anyways idk what I'm really trying to say here other than good story, Gorthan is a good character, I WISH we got to see more of him after this but we don't really. Go read The Little Prince.

[cinnamon-galaxies]

What are your top 3 favorite ship dynamics? I was watching “Relationship dynamics from tumblr 2” by tonka joey (give it a watch! It has 7 or maybe more parts and is really fun) on youtube and i got curious.

have a good day!

My favorite relationship dynamics

You literally send me into a rabbit hole with that question. I've been researching relationship dynamics for the last few hours straight and I'm pretty sure I won't stop for the next hours or even days. It's just so much fun and now I really feel the urge to draw Alastor and Mara in as many fitting relationship dynamics as possible. I swear, the ideas are COOKING.

There are so many good dynamics what makes it even harder for me to answer your question because it feels impossible for me to reduce the list to just my top three... So, this response might get a little bit out of hands. But maybe it'll be a helpful inspiration for anyone who reads this!

So, one of my all time favorite tropes is "enemies to lovers". And there are so many possibilities to showcase this trope in different dynamics...

First off, there's the classic "enemies to lovers". Both hate each other or are on different sides but end up falling in love. Oh, the denial and slow burn is just chefs kiss. I just adore a well written push and pull between two characters who are supposedly enemies or rivals but secretly pine for each other.

But what about two characters who despise each other but accidentally end up in bed just to regret their actions the morning after? Ooooooh, the potential... The possibility of creating delicious second hand embarrassment and the possible banter between the character's following afterwards while they continue pretending as if nothing happened even though both of them get constantly haunted by the memory of sharing a night together... Just 😘👌🏻

Or imagine enemies who are ALSO lovers? Like hate-love relationship but take it LITERALLY.

Another category of ship dynamics I ADORE is "villainous couples". Both of them just want to watch the world burn; they're both murderers and horrible people but their relationship is all loving, caring and healthy and just all over wholesome. They're devoted to each other like Gomez and Morticia Addams and support each other's heinous plans. This is definitely a top tier dynamic, in my opinion.

Other villain ship dynamics I like are "evil genius x the supportive". Or "the tough ahh mastermind villain x their annoying simp". (I've thought about this dynamic so often and it sounds hilarious.)

Or what I'm also into (which is also a classic) is "villain x ex hero". Who cares about redeeming the villain when the hero can get corrupted...? Especially if the villain is in the right the whole time or if the villain just loves to create chaos but is still charismatic af. (Dude doesn't need to be changed. He's perfect the way he is 👌🏻)

"The person who doesn't believe in love but then falls in love with the hopeless romantic" will also have my heart forever! The denial, the mutual pining but not wanting to confess because they fear rejection or appearing weak (It's basically every good Alastor x OC/reader romance story I've read and I'm down bad for this trope.)

"Grumpy x Sunshine"? A classic. I like it. But what about "looks evil but is actually sweet x looks sweet but is actually a psychopath"?

Or "looks dangerous but is completely harmless x looks harmless but will actually kill you if you hurt their partner"?

"Big scary demon overlord x their little bean" is also so much fun to read and write. Or just imagine "big scary demon overlord x random dude":

Character A: "ł'₥ ���ØⱤ₲Ø₮Ⱨ, ĐɆ₴₮ⱤØɎɆⱤ Ø₣ ₩ØⱤⱠĐ₴!!! And this is Steve."

Character B: *casually waves their hand*

Or just "the tough ahh stoic and intimidating character who has a huge soft spot for character B"... It's so cute in my opinion and I just love it when all grumpy melts around their partner... It makes them appear even more special to them...

I also like the idea of "tough and serious x silly and clumsy" (bonus points if they have ADHD).

I just really like polar opposites as a dynamic, especially if everyone else thinks they don't match but it actually works out perfectly for them! They're so much fun and can complement each other in ways that make stories so exciting...

Well, that was already a lot. But since I've already exaggerated this post I can also just round this off by adding a list of other ship dynamics I think are fun:

- autism x ADHD

- wide eyed and curious x the cool one that admires them

- character that get shipped with each other and both of them hate it/find it annoying

- chill tall one x angry short one

- traumatized x traumatized but smug

- two idiots with one brain cell (they share that single brain cell)

- scary eldritch horror x the one who thinks it's kinky (this just sounds so much fun... Imagine character A goes all scary and intimidating but B is just: "Damn, that's hot.")

And well, basically Gomez x Morticia. (I know I already mentioned it but that was in the "villain" context. They don't need to be evil. They're just a wholesome and happy couple that's completely devoted to each other until the end of time.)

[all-pacas]

thinking about my enemy (saviors) again

i think my problem/frustration in the episode is that it only last one episode, right?

so to recap, it's the camchase engagement episode. cameron is freaking out because she found the ring, and she's avoiding chase while she processes. the episode is very much on her side: it doesn't suggest she's right to do this, but it's sympathetic to her reasons: she's afraid for a number of reasons. she thinks chase doesn't "mean it", that it's a reaction to kutner dying and him being impulsive. that the relationship might not last ( l o l ). that losing people is scary and commitment is scary and she's just scared. and she does a very cameron thing and tries to extract herself entirely from the situation, push it away. she doesn't, she explains to house, want to say yes or no. she wants this situation to not happen.

cameron is also fairly clear that it isn't about not wanting to be with chase, both explicitly and implicitly (he dumps her in the episode, so there's that problem solved; she also makes it clear that her biggest fear is that he isn't serious, not that she doesn't want to marry him). and honestly? i get it! i am sympathetic! i think she goes about all this totally wrong, but the episode and house agree with that; cameron is fucking up. by avoiding chase, she's making the situation much worse. chase breaks up with her about it. she fucked up! so far, so good. and then cameron realizes she fucked up and goes to him to………………… apologize? you'd think, right?

meanwhile!

chase goes through like 8 stages of a breakup in this episode. at first, cameron tells him she has a really good, but secret, reason for cancelling their vacation. he is not thrilled, fair enough, but he gives her the benefit of the doubt. cameron says she just needs a day. a day passes.

chase realizes that she is still avoiding him, while also hanging all over house. the show tries to play this as ooooooh love triangle, but none of the characters really take this seriously; chase does go through the motions of jealousy but doesn't really seem that worried about the house part, just the cameron lying to him part. she promises him she has a very good reason for this. he confronts her about this: ("So you admit you lied to me. And now you’re asking me to trust you?"), but reluctantly agrees to keep waiting. clearly he's getting pretty stressed, but he's being a good boyfriend here.

cameron continues to lie and avoid him, and chase finds out she's been at work this whole time, that she's been kicked off house's case (thus lying about what she's doing), etc. he confronts her again and demands to know what's going on. she doesn't tell him. he dumps her.

so far? i don't have any issues. from either of them! they're both acting… maybe not rationally, but as you'd expect. cameron is trying to avoid confrontation and facing her feelings and got hit by consequences she wasn't expecting. part of her is trying to blow up the relationship because it's easier than doing something scary like talk about feelings. chase tried to give her space and time, drew a line, and broke up with cameron when she refused to meet him there. it's sad for them both; it's in character for them both.

so here's the problem. here's the big fucking problem.

cameron realizes, with help from house, that she fucked up. so she goes to chase to apologize (she never apologizes) and try to get him to take her back. she explains why she was freaked out: she found the ring and was scared, but she knows it was an excuse and does want to marry him. she then asks him to propose to her, i guess to prove that she does want to say yes, but cameron, get on your damn knee, come on, he dumped you.

here's the problem.

cameron has been promising that she had a really good reason why she was avoiding chase. she has insisted to him for days that it's a real reason and she just can't tell him: chase has no idea why she's been acting this way, just that she did. so he finally finds out, right? and the reason is: the sheer concept of marrying you made me ghost you.

i mean, yes. the reason is cameron was scared. in lockdown they subtly retcon this into i had cold feet, i say subtly not because that isn't true but it severely downplays the "ghost you until you dump me" of it all. but. can you imagine. can you imagine wanting to marry someone and finding out the big secret, really good, really justified, reason they've been avoiding you was they know that.

cameron never apologizes. the show treats her as wrong, in that her panic spiral was misguided and ended up with her dealing with consequences she does not want -- her actions bit her in the ass! oh no! -- but the show never really gives us chase's pov or chase's perspective on this. "i changed my mind! propose to me now!" it is considered a victory that he does. they are happy. they tell cuddy, holding hands. it is a happy ending.

from his perspective, he's looking forward to a nice minibreak, he's planning to propose, his girlfriend suddenly cancels but says she has a good reason for it, starts lying to him, he dumps her very reluctantly because she refuses to talk to him, and then he finds out that all of this is because she hated the idea of him proposing that much. she explains this to him and asks he propose anyway. she does not apologize or acknowledge he was right to break up with her or express guilt for her actions.

to be clear, it is not meant to be like this. from the way the episode never addresses this again to the way camchase are happy-go-lucky and happy going forward (the sperm thing, a relative non-issue in comparison -- they both compromise for the other immediately -- lasts two episodes and is given more weight), to the way chase apparently has no doubts or worries whatsoever two weeks later -- it is clear this is meant to be a sweet episode. we are meant to feel bad for cameron and happy she worked out her issues. this is a romantic proposal. did they have a long conversation about it off screen? who knows! i hate this episode so much <3

-

when chase, in lockdown, says that cameron never loved him, it's always struck me as a very silly little retcon. the whole conversation. the whole subplot. it's not bad, certainly not in the same way as saviors is, but it's different, because up until this point, we've always seen the relationship from cameron's pov: she's had all the agency and power. when she makes mistakes or has to learn and grow, it's always in a "she's being so brave about it!" sort of way: we never get to see chase Learn and Grow or make mistakes (and it isn't because he's so perfect and not a fuck up, it's because cameron is much more important to the show than he is). it's also a retcon because we see cameron fight for and make sacrifices/changes for the relationship, a lot: she quit in s3 out of loyalty to chase (as stated by house later). she falls over herself in the itch and both sides now to make chase happy.

as part of the you-never-loved-me exchange in lockdown, there's a very funny bit where chase is listing cameron's red flags and she protests each one. it's funny because there was no basis for this in the episodes we saw, but i actually do kind of think this was the intent: she called him over for meth sex because she already liked him (we see in s1+2 that actually they are friends, even if it's never underlined). she dumped him in s3 because she did have feelings and was scared (as chase himself points out in s3; as she agrees with implicitly in act your age and human error, but the show again forgot to underline the point). i actually think we were meant to see the relationship as cameron lays it out. i had cold feet, she says, to justify saviors. this is true. it also makes her behavior kind of not a big deal. this is exactly how the episode presents it.

chase's "you never loved me" rant is funny, because for the first time, the show is on his side. things that were genuinely not seen as issues or important when we were in cameron's pov are suddenly problems. chase is still on the show, and now his feelings matter. suddenly, saviors was grounds for divorce, and not the sweet music montage niceness it presented itself as at the time. suddenly their divorce is about cameron, when earlier in the season it was very much about chase.

[torchstelechos]

just saw you saying you want to talk about The Characters (isat) what are some thoughts you got bip bap boppin around in the noggin about the Them

Ooooooooohhhh Anon,,,, Ooooooh, You have unlocked deep thoughts and long monologues.... have this piece of bullshit that I spat out in excitement

Isabeau: 

Ah yes, dear Isabeau, my most beloathed <3 (self recognition in other /derogatory). He’s one of the characters I’ve written the most meta for that's actually about his character in the game. I love him and hate him in equal measures but that's not what I want to talk about today! I want to discuss his morbid humor and fascination, I suppose. Also his rather interesting character type and how that's displayed in the game, specifically through his morbid thoughts and discussion choices. 

In the game we see plenty of times that Isabeau uses morbid word choices (killed them so that I could live friendquest quote) and brings up morbid discussion topics (what do we do if you die? What do we do if Bonnie dies?) that the others find disquieting. He also laughs at Siffrin’s time traveler joke, finds scary Siffrin attractive, and finds being paid attention too enough that they can harm you attractive. This brings me to my main point, which is that Isabeau is the cold scientist archetype character that tries to be the himbo fighter character. Of course we know that hes trying to hide himself behind the himbo character type, but the fact that he's analytic to a fault, morbid in almost every way, finds scary things attractive, and calls Changing killing his past self… this man is very much a scientist that was about to turn evil but decided friendship was the answer whose character was subverted into himbo fighter because those who are dumb are more liked than those who know things. It's interesting, and I think it’s one of the reasons I despise Isabeau POV fanfics. Most fanfics feel almost like his facade is him, and thats just not true and it bugs me so very much to read fanfics with his POV now. But! This isnt to say those fanfics aren’t well done! They are, I just find them lacking in canon Isabeau’s almost neutral analytical personality that was then filtered through therapy and self help books esque vibe. Fascinating character, hate him dearly for it though. 

Misc thoughts: 

I generally have a hard time nailing down everything I feel about him for a variety of reasons but I do want to say that I think he finds Siffrin’s big melt down appearance attractive after the whole thing blows over. I also think he doesn't have the best track record for what is okay to say or not? So he falls back on “I am dumb therefore I can say things that others find disturbing and frame it as something I just don't understand or misunderstood :)” which kind of backfires on him constantly because now no one really takes him seriously? I don’t know, I just find most smart characters have a hard time figuring out the social situation of certain things so they tend to either not care at all for tact or overthink everything and over compensate by not allowing themself to go for certain things. In this instance its him not being able to confess because he thinks he's bad for liking someone in a certain way and doesn't want to pressure them which backfires because he's otherwise a good communicator but failed hard with Siffrin. Speaking of, I don’t think hes ever gotten with anyone other than Siffrin. It took the world literally almost ending and a time looping induced trauma attack for him to confess he liked Siffrin, this man does NOT have game. So, lol, that kiss? Probably his first <3, RIP my man did not deserve that

Odile:

Strangely enough I don’t believe I have ever written a meta post for Odile? Or anything about her other than tags? So yeah, let's focus on her. She's a very honesty based character in a game literally about someone not being able to speak the truth, which is why I appreciate the sus route so much. She noticed something was wrong and went for it, leading her down rabbit holes best left untouched. Odile is a character that I truly think would have accidentally unleashed an eldritch horror on the quest if not for Isabeau stopping her. Mainly because she is smart but not academic smart, she's learned from her travels plenty of things that lend to real life experience but she's not much of an academic when it comes to how to get answers she wants (taking until the very last town to get a familytale while Siffrin took maybe three loops to do is. Certainly something!). Its fascinating, because if I were to actually describe her personality and how that lends to a character archetype I would say that she's a brawler character. Effectively, she and Isabeau are reflections of each other in a very specific way and I think about this often in her relation to the group. Its almost laughable how shes been put into this responsibility role of the group while Isabeau is off goofing around (and secretly plotting how to best respect his friends remains), shes not very good at knowing what is the best course of action and acts out in impulsive ways that harms others (Looking at you, hitting Trauma Big Siffrin moment) and that doesn’t… make her a good leader per say? I just find it funny, how others write her as someone who would go out of her way to research Siffrin’s home country and succeed when she barely succeeded in her own knowledge hunt. If anything, it would be Isabeau who would find the information and inform Odile rather than the other way round. I dunno, I just don’t think anyone is really considering the fact that she probably hasn’t set foot into a higher academic institution just based on her research skills. 

Misc thoughts: 

I’ve only seen one fanfic acknowledge the fact that Odile hit Siffrin? And did so in such a way that it hurt badly. I wouldn’t be surprised if it left a scar (which that little freak probably adores because he knows that it means he wont forget Odile ever again), alongside the others they gave themself. Speaking of said hurting, I don’t think it's really acknowledged how much Odile puts down Siffrin? Yes it's usually just a teasing moment here or there, but have yall thought of the fact that she compared Siffrin to an animal and has hit him? I think about this so much. I think about it when I'm trying to fall asleep sometimes. She did that to him, and he *remembers it,* he acknowledges it during act 5, he has that ingrained into his *soul.* I think people should write about it more, or at least acknowledge that Siffrin probably… doesn’t want to talk to Odile about feelings or be touched by her for a while? Honestly, if I was Siffrin’s position during the failed friendquest moments? I would have said worse. I would have done worse. Because can you imagine? Imagine with me, you just remembered that your country is gone, everyone you love either doesnt remember you or is dead, the only person who could possibly tell you anything is the man you must kill, and your family member is talking about how hard it is to be in the country her mother is from and not feel a connection to it. That you are both more than your heritage. I would start biting, kicking, fighting, hell I would probably find out what she looks like without her bun! I would be pissed. But yaknow, Siffrin is a nice fella and kind of only waited to go off the deep end when they were sure they wouldn’t be able to escape. Anyway, I think of Odile sometimes and get violently ill by the knowledge she no longer holds that would explain some of Siffrin’s reactions and word choices to her cause no matter what? She can’t take it back. She never even said it. It’s not even real anymore. God I love this game, it makes me feel sick.

Mirabelle: 

Big ol’ sigh, yeah the-bitter-ocean if your out there I think about your tags on my Mira post a lot. The fandom doesn’t really get her do they? Most of the time I see people write her off as not very understanding or oblivious to other people’s feelings, which fair for romance (she didnt notice the very glowing sign of what I believe to be a ginger blushing but yaknow I understand as aro) but shes very good at knowing when someone isn’t feeling well? She has several unique dialogue options after Siffrin gets up from the field after looping which Odile does not have (despite EVERYONE ACKNOWLEDGING THEY’RE NOT OKAY), and asks after their wellbeing despite being in a constant anxiety attack and morality stress issues induced panic attack in the house. The only real big character flaw is a very typical shonen main character flaw which is that she is too trusting to a degree that it let Siffrin get away with almost destroying the world, Bonnie dying, and the others stepping all over her own feelings (not that any of these are her fault, but she did contribute to the lack of communication which lead to the loops. I love her, I do, but EVERYONE had a hand in Siffrin getting stuck in the loops). Her trust is also what led to the big fallout and slap she gives Siffrin during act 5, she was already giving her heart to him and the others and was constantly checking in during the adventure to make sure everyone was happy and okay with what was happening so the sudden switch from her POV is a huge betrayal of her trust in them. This is basically someone you were already on edge about hating you suddenly deciding that yes, they do hate you and everything you stand for because *they know.* No matter what you think about the situation, Mirabelle’s trust (her biggest character flaw) was thrown back into her face after she thought they were okay with her (not even a few weeks ago they said that this was the happiest they have ever been and she *remembers this fully and utterly*) and broke her heart with all her insecurities. It’s a very hopeless situation when you don’t have context, which means I don’t really blame her for slapping Siffrin, I just wish that it didn’t happen because as a Player I know the full context. Betrayal of trust… its a funny thing in this game, because it wasn’t a betrayal specifically from one POV but from the other it was. Fascinating! I despise it, I love it, it makes me sick. 

Misc Thoughts: 

Oooooh Mira we are in it now, This endgame of yours has left you with insecurities and trauma you didn’t think possible. I love her, I do, which is why I also have a great idea for a fanfic that involves her getting some VERY bad coping mechanisms <3 teehee. Careful what you wish for darling! Things go bad if you don’t take care of what you love. Anyway, I don’t think it’s weird to have Mira in outfits that are contrasting too heavily from her personality in the game? I dont know how to say this, but I think it’s a tad strange that I’ve seen roleswap aus/personality swap aus where Mirabelle is different via aesthetic? Because thats her whole religion? Sure she doesnt want to change but I don’t think she minds much clothing or aesthetic wise? In fact i think she considers that the safest option? So I dunno, I think people should dress her in goth and emo outfits more. Also I do think its a tad silly people don’t focus too much on her journey trauma and rather focus on her romance trauma, yall know that was just a distraction and not her main issues, right? Like yall know this game isnt romance the simulator, right???? RIGHT???? God Mira, you would hate that the fandom boils you down to your AceAroness, I just fucking know it. 

Bonnie: 

Who let this sassy small child into this story???? God, dearest Bonnie, the literal best party member Imo. I love them dearly, they are one of the meanest fucking assholes in the game I adore them. Yall think about the longstanding issues Siffrin has with touch and reaching out and how the rotten adults route fucking annihilates them into smithereens lol. I think about the fact that Bonnie has harmed Siffrin soooo much in the loops, it leaves me breathless because this small child has killed Siffrin twice, slapped their hands away when they tried to help them (for the first time in Bonnies POV!! Thats huge!!), and yelled at them multiple times about how awful they are. I do wonder what would have happened if the rotten adults route continued without looping? Who would have spoken up and who would have had to realize that something is WRONG with Siffrin in that moment? Would Bonnie backpedal when they realize? What was Siffrin’s facial expression right then? What happened? I just. God. Fuck. No one talks about this AT ALL in the fandom and it drives me insane. Despite everything, despite what was erased, what was unmade, the effects stayed and will continue to harm Siffrin. Do yall think about the idea that Siffrin probably doesnt reach out until Bonnie does post loops? I think about this so much, Bonnie has harmed Siffrin so many times it would kill them if they ever found out, and I desperately need them to find out. I also kind of,, just assumed that Bonnie would be keeping a keen eye on Siffrin’s eating and remind them to eat and drink water (even if I dont think Siffrin needs that) after the loops because its an easy way to help and have some control over situations? I dunno, I think Bonnie is a very complicated kid who has harmed and been harmed and no one will ever know just how much has been done and undone. 

Misc Thoughts: 

I still think Bonnie should be able to make and throw bombs post bomb memory. I just NEED Bonnie to throw a molotov at the King, fuck, it would be so funny. Also as a side note, I do think growing up Bonnie has to deal with a lot of untreated Trauma and probably reacts very similar to Siffrin before someone comments on the fact that they are just like him and suddenly they start going to a therapist about it, I do not think they would take it as a compliment for even one instance. They would get sick so fast and go, me and them? Similar? No. I have to go to get a doctor. I cannot be a Frin Jr. the world could not handle it. And suddenly they have the second best mental health of the group (first goes to Isabeau because Isabeau was already in therapy before the game, I just fucking know it <3) which makes everyone fucking jealous as hell because seriously? The Kid??? Damnit. But yeah I do think the fastest way anyone could get Bonnie to accept help is to compare them to Siffrin because they do have a Recognition of Self in the Other (derogatory) thing going on with Siffrin in the game, which is probably worse by the fact that they grew up with him as a role model. Everyone that knows them is like, oh my change your so lucky! The saviors are your family that must be so cool <3, and Bonnie is like. They make me to go to bed on time and force me to eat veggies what the fuck are you saying. Anyway yeah I love Bonnie so much, the meanest fucking kid in the game <3. 

Siffrin: 

Aaauuuggghhhhh, the one everyone is waiting for, the Siff of the Frin. Love this fucking idiot, but yeah lets talk touch and how the family has hurt them over the loops <3. Okay so straight out the gate, Bad touch! Isabeau pushing them away after they kiss him, which is very understandable because yaknow Isabeau could tell that was a desperation kiss and is not okay for either of them but! Holy shit! Siffrin, my dear friend that was probably the worst thing you could have done, but yeah that did leave its marks deeply in them so I will mark that down as harmed. Then we get the bad friendquests, which yeah Isabeau hitting them with the “I thought you were also trying” hurts more than I can physically say, but we’ll mark that down as two. Then Odile hits them, grabs their collar, sus quest bullshit, and general disdain for Siffrin lying about the stars we’ll mark down as four more which leads to six. Mirabelle slapping Siffrin and letting him get away with lying about his health we’ll put at 8. Bonnie pushing him into a tear, pineapple, slapping hands away, and yelling at them multiple times we’ll put at 12. Then there's the “like taming a wild animal” teasing which Ill put at 13, all of which is just off the top of my brain and I know there's more moments that hurt Siffrin deeply. Yaknow, looking at this, typing this, it seems a tad silly but. How else could I describe the never ending pain at knowing that most of these wont be acknowledged as bad for Siffrin as it was bad for the others? I dunno, I think about Siffrin giving everything up for the party and no one knowing exactly what they did because how could they? It’s gone. It’s not real anymore, not until Siffrin says it. I just. I dont know where I’m going with this but Siffrin as a character hurts me deeply, and I think it’s because no matter what happens Siffrin refuses to acknowledge when the others hurt him back. Just. Keeping the cycle going because they dont know how to break it, and they never have until they break first. I just think of this a lot. Him being stuck, in circles over and over. 

Misc Thoughts: 

I wanna chew him up and spit him out like a dog toy. No further comments (see my blog for further comments). ((I need to see a Self inflicted Achromatic animatic, pls, fuck plsssss))

LOOP: 

Loop time!! Loop time! I am physically ill because of this beast. You all know that one fanart where it says “You Won!” and Loop is dry heaving? Thats me at literally any moment when I think about Loop. 

I am a little shy to admit though that I didn’t catch their facade at first, mainly because I’m not very good at catching things like that at first? If a person acts a certain way, thats how they act! So Yeah, ya boy was confused by two hats lol. But afterwards I did do a bit of thinking and as I mentioned in a previous post i do think Loop is pretending/acting like how they remembered Siffrin acted like before the loops. Mira mentions that Siffrin is mean in teasing, enough so that it might have hurt if she didnt know that it was friendly teasing. Isabeau has a great monologue about his feelings on Siffrin before the loops, and Siffrin themself acknowledges some of their less than savory traits before the loops during the loops as well. This is to say, Loop is a fucking prick that tries to be floating and teasing in their comments while hitting where it hurts in just the right way that they can pretend that they mean something else. I genuinely think thats how Loop remembers themself before they were Loop, even if they got some things VERY WRONG. Of course, by the time they realize this it’s too late and that’s their personality now, which is kind of fucked up when you realize how much of their personality is them acting out a half remembered person who died many many many loops ago. But alas, such is the way of Loop. 

Also if we think about Loop in comparison to Siffrin. Well. We get an interesting picture. But the thought makes me too ill to continue. But I will say loving someone so much you destroy yourself for them… I don't think anyone in the family would be happy about that really. Theres a difference between destroying yourself and destroying the world… I wonder why that is for them, what made the difference between self and the world. A fool, and the world. Hmm. Interesting. Anyway, Loop’s facade gets me everytime and I want to use them as a stuffed animal. 

Misc Thoughts: 

Yeah that STAR CAN NOT EAT OR DRINK, lol get rekted they cant even fucking get drunk. Now for some HCs, I do think that Loop would wear a promise ring, even if no one in this Vaugarde understands what that means. I just. Think that Loop wouldn’t be able to let go of Their Fighter. Hahaha! I don’t really wanna go further into detail about this rn but I AM THINKING… Loop is one of the saddest characters I have ever fucking had the audacity to love. No I will not take comments on this further lol. (Me loving Loop and Siffrin while disliking Isabeau? Call me an Isabeau Kinnie at the rate lol)

[pomefioredove]

Neige when a Disney princess: I sleep -^-

Neige when a warrior princess: real shit •u•

Thanks to that person for feeding the three Neige lovers in this fandom <3

anon it's actually so funny you phrase it like this because a long time ago I was playing with this concept of the disney princes/heroes being girls in twst. I think my original funnie thought was fem hercules giving idia the worst noogie of his life (they're cousins) and I like women so you know. gots to have my women

ooooooh the idea of neige with a scary strong princess charming just HITS for me especially

[thelaurenshippen]

Out of every film that exists, give one to each of your podcasts. I wanna see what vibes you think, cause I rlly wanna listen to some!

ooooooh GREAT question. this has me fully stumped, because I really don't watch a ton of movies? I'm much more of a TV person. but I'll do my best.

The Bright Sessions - depending on the season, this could really change. but, at its core, TBS is an emotional sci-fi story that's super queer, so...Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind meets Love, Simon meets...like, the non-saving-the-world parts of The Incredibles or...idk, Matilda.

Breaker Whiskey - Another Earth meets Portrait of a Lady on Fire.

Bridgewater - Hereditary is a horror movie about family trauma, right? So that, but not as scary or sad, plus cryptids.

Maxine Miles - Harriet the Spy meets The Goonies, but with environmental anxiety.

New Year’s Day - take The Prestige and The Illusionist, shake, add a dash of The Greatest Showman and then make it gay.

Surviving Hawkins - I mean, obviously, the TV show this is most like is, uh, Stranger Things (this was the official ST podcast I wrote lol), but actually it's closer to Dead Poet's Society or The History Boys, especially since there's no Upside Down business.

Passenger List - I really just want to say that Idris Elba Apple TV show about a plan hijacking but I'm committed to the movie thing--there's an element of Girl with the Dragon Tattoo in here, plus maybe Flight Plan or...Shutter Island even?

and, honorable mentions (shows I produced but didn't write):

In Strange Woods - this is tricky because it's a musical but...Into the Wild meets Spotlight (but not sad in the same way) meets....a musical.

Life With LEO(h) - Her but, like, fun and actually romantic. Her + Pride & Prejudice + Nora Ephron movies.

Look Up - I have never seen it, but Briggon loves the movie Handsome Devil so I'm putting that here along with, like, the tiniest little sprinkling of Moonlight.

Greenhouse - jesus, there are not enough fun sapphic romance movies. Imagine Me & You meets You've Got Mail.

but I'd LOVE to hear all your thoughts, listeners!!

[notsocheezy]

V-Day - The First Twenty-Four Hours

Guess who's got two thumbs and no penis? That's right, this girlish-shaped thing!

👍���

My "the surgery" went off without a hitch! And it couldn't have happened at a weirder time. The news has been absolutely wild this week, hasn't it? Mass Windows system outages, Biden dropping out of the presidential race... probably some other stuff... I'll be honest, I'm a little woozy from the Oxycodone, so a lot of the past week escapes me at the moment. But let me tell you all about the first day. I still remember most of that.

I arrived at the hospital at about 5AM yesterday, and they had me wipe down with CHG wipes even though I'd just taken a CHG shower. I guess they like to be safe. But it leaves a residue that isn't the most pleasant thing in the world. It's kind of like when you step out of the ocean and the salt dries onto your skin in a fine, well-seasoned flaky layer.

After that, they gave me a morphine injection into my spinal fluid, which according to the pain management guy, reduces the overall necessary intake of opiates/opioids (what is the difference between those anyway?). So far that seems to be very true. My new bits don't hurt in the slightest even now, after the injection has worn off.

On the other hand, though, there has been excruciating pain in my chest and shoulders. You see, this was a laparoscopic surgery performed with a fancy robot - the DaVinci XI - and they had to pump me full of CO2 so they'd have room to work. That's right folks - I'm carbonated. And they didn't just give me one new hole, but an additional five incisions on my abdomen, which also don't really hurt but damn are they itchy. It turns out though, being a human balloon is a really bad experience. If I'd had an inflation kink before, this would probably have killed it in its tracks.

When I woke up in Recovery, I was at 10/10 on the pain scale. It was truly miserable. They had to inject me with Fentanyl (Ooooooh, scary!) just so I could breathe. Once they did, though, I was fine. That is, until they moved me onto the bed in my room several hours later. Now the pain comes and goes, but I'm on pills for that.

Other than the chest pain, the most uncomfortable thing is the catheter. It constantly feels like I've just gotten back from a long road trip without pit stops, or the credits just rolled on an IMAX screening of Oppenheimer (I saw that twice, by the way). I have to pee so damn bad, but I'm just kinda... always peeing. Very weird. Nice not to have to get up, but I'm not even really allowed to get up. Which is a shame, because I'm told moving around will help the CO2, ahem, escape. Via the most obvious channel, of course.

On that note, I was on a liquid diet until about an hour ago, and now I've got an omelet and some oatmeal that they forgot to put sugar or salt in. They really want to get my guts up and running again - they gave me a laxative and a stool softener. But I'm nervous about getting up from the bed. I've got more wires attached to me than my PC at home, so I'll need to unhook everything to get to the bathroom.

Anyway, other than being misgendered a concerning amount of times by people who should be able to read the word "vaginoplasty" on my chart, everyone has been very kind. I thought I'd be more scared and depressed being left in the hospital by myself, with all my loved ones hours away, but I've been able to make friends with the nurses.

If you're on the fence about getting this done because you're scared of the recovery process, don't worry. I'm only a day in and I'm doing just fine. Electrolysis was significantly more painful down there than this is. Can't speak for more traditional methods, but the robot is damn good. I, for one, welcome our new robotic sex-change overlords.

Anyway, stay tuned for more. I'm here all week.

[evolutionsvoid]

Stand aside horror movies, creepypastas and scary cryptid vids, I got the spooky scary monster to really scare ya good! Oh ho ho, you haven't seen a spookier fellow than this, just you wait til you run into this big scary boy! Witness the sheer horror of its pale skin, gangly limbs and big EEEEEEVIL TEETH! Frightening and unique! I've never seen such horror! Oh, you think he is smiling because he is happy and thus he just big friendly? OOOOOOH but this nasty fellow isn't actually nice smiling! He's big toothy grin is mean and nasty! AAAAAH SO SPOOKY! Why he look happy when he do the bad!?

Now that I have created the most scariest of scary guys, no doubt all the movies and creators shall be ringing me up to use my big creepy boy! No need to design anything else, this perfection is copyrighted by me! A billion dollars, please!

[milkie2]

hello tumblr mutual milkie2

coughs i was asking a couple mutuals how they would perhaps feel about being invited to a small discord server for ava guys because the big ones are scary and i wanted to see if you were perhaps interested

no pressure at all to accept of course !!!!!! thank you for your time ok bye 🏃

OOOOOOH Yeah im interested!!^^^^ HEHEFHFHEHFDS although keep in mind i don't use discord a lot 😭

The big servers are definitely scary I literally don't talk in there at all except to post art on the fan-creations channel LMFAO

Feel free to hit me up in the DMs though if you have invite YIPPPEEEEEEYIPPEEEEEEE

[crazylittlejester]

DAILY(?) BRAINROT

I'm feeling more like myself today, and have been getting through my Tuesday schedule as per usual. Right now I have a break before my last class of the day, so I'm taking a moment to yap. >:)

In my Portuguese textbook, there's a section on murder mysteries and I got to explain Sherlock Holmes to my classmate, which was great! The only bad thing is that Sherlock Holmes is one of my Yap Topics and I did not get to info dump about Sir Arthur Conan Doyle. :( Anyway, that got me thinking about Agatha Christie, because they're both awesome mystery writers and even though I haven't specifically researched any potential relationships (friendly or otherwise) between the two, I believe they were writing around the same time. And of course, Agatha Christie is the author of And Then There Were None, so I'm champing at the bit to work on my silly little AU again.

If you would like to hear about Sir Arthur Conon Doyle's biography, just hit me up, I've got so much info on this guy.

Tragically, I have two meetings after this next class and I need to finish writing two news articles before the first one starts, so I don't really have the time to drag out my notes at this point, but maybe tomorrow. Maybe if the writing gods bless me.

On a side tanget, I just got out of a different class and my professor was lecturing on filter bubbles (AKA epistemic bubbles) and now I feel greatly inspired to write something involving that, because realizing you're inside one of those is kind of scary, and it raises an awful lot of big questions about everything you think you knew.

I’m so glad you’re feeling better dude!!

I loved the sherlock books when i read a few years and years ago, feel free to yap about Sir Arthur Conan Doyle and/or Agatha Christie whenever you want I would genuinely love to hear it! (And Im still very excited for that au whenever you end up working more on it, it’s such a cool idea!!)

aw nooooo, i hope the writing gods will be good to you you deserve it

ooooooh! that would be very interesting

remember to get some water and foods after all your meetings and classes, take care of yourself dude 🫶

[merfolk-monika]

Clothing Therapy with Emily (Monika)

"I've heard of you; everyone knows your reputation."

Monika was already being snippy and rude to Emily, as she always is. Emily was already beginning to get tired of her, but she wasn't the confrontational type.

"Your energy is always so chaotic, Monika," she muttered, her voice slightly frustrated. "The spirits are clearly far from pleased. What is your problem?"

"oOoOoOh, I'm sooooo scared of what some guy who dies a thousand fucking years ago thinks of me, so scary." Monika mocked, rolling her eyes. "Have you ever read a book that wasn't fiction? Maybe a scholarly article once in a while would be good for you". She snickered as she demeaned Emily, finding things to pick apart with everything she said as she began to set up the feathers for Monika's outfit.

Emily's patience had worn thin. She began to confront Monika, grumbling, "Have you ever considered that if you act like a complete brat, you will have no one left that cares for you?" She glanced at Monika. "No one wants to be with someone so toxic and demeaning."

"You don't think I already know?" Monika looked over at her with a nonchalant expression. "It's the same thing people tell me over and over again."

Emily raised an eyebrow, wondering where Monika was going with this. "Are you trying to make an excuse?" She looked at the merfolk skeptically

Monika chuckled, "Well, aren't you unoriginal." She rolled her eyes. "I couldn't give less of a shit what you think I'm doing or what you think I need to do. I get that shit so often, I gave up trying a long time ago."

Emily looked confused and a tad worried. "Does this really happen that often for that long?" She asked, "It sounds like you don't get a lot of positive words thrown your way-"

Monika interrupted suddenly, "What, are you a cop? Why are you sticking your nose where it isn't welcome?"

Emily sighs, Monika was hopeless and she knew it. "Because this is a Clothing Therapy session?" She explained, worn out.

"Yeah, yeah, so basically a designer fashion appointment for self-expression. let's move on." Monika brushes Emily off, not at all addressing the new information she gave to Emily as they continue the appointment.

[good-beanswrites]

Eheheh! The anon who sent the ask on the Lights, Camera, Sing Your Sins here! Happy to hear you like the silly thought I made up, bonus on making a small drabble on it! So happy! >w<

So I guess when Mikoto's condition is revealed during his first interrogation, everyone's like "Ooooooh that's why..." over it. And uuuuuuh, does Kotoko feel bad for bashing Mikoto back then? I think it's not scripted according to that post you made back then, but no hard feelings between them, right? And I guess Shidou wouldn't be happy that the prisoners are getting into actual fights ;;

I really did! :D Thank you so much for reaching out, I love hearing people’s thoughts and ideas!!

I'm always very committed to keeping any canon hatred accurate -- I won't sugar-coat a relationship that has been stated to be terrible. However. This is not canon, and I am employing every fix-it in my arsenal >:3 So yes, there are absolutely no hard feelings between them and after every trial they hang out and make up!!

It pains me that all the violence in Mikoto’s interrogation has to be real, but yeah, neither of them pull any punches. Of course Red doesn’t want to hurt Es, but I picture all the prisoners really driven by the desire to tell their stories. Unlike in canon, the au characters are very aware that they’re going to represent a larger social issue/group of people. So when Mikoto is instructed to really sell it, he does it for the sake of accurate experiment results for others like him – and clings to the trust that Es signed up for this. 

And Kotoko’s interference is such a core part of her character: she’s observant, she’s clever, she’s used to and skilled at breaking rules, and she’s such a protector, even to the person who’s holding her imprisoned. It felt unfair to take that away from her by making it something Milgram scripted, so her reaction had to be real and just as violent ;-;

Okay so you know when you’re playing a game with friends/family and you feel very real anger at them for their decisions/actions? Then after it ends you can cool off and acknowledge it was just a game and there’s no hard feelings at all – but you can still clearly remember what made you upset and know it was valid? That’s what I'm picturing when the prisoners write their t2 plans. Kotoko’s anger towards the guilty prisoners is genuine by the end of the first trial. She’s very hurt that Mikoto wouldn’t tell them the truth about himself, after all the secrets they’d collectively shared. She’s disgusted by the others’ actions. She’s not actually planning on beating them up, but she recognizes she kinda wants to lol. Amane does hate Shidou. Yuno is tired of everyone. 

But a few days after the first trial ends, they start interacting in a setting that isn’t immersive anymore. They’re able to relax and talk through everything with clear minds. Kotoko apologizes profusely for hurting Mikoto during the interrogation, admitting that she’s not entitled to anyone else’s secrets. Amane apologizes to Shidou. She may not be as friendly to him as he was hoping, but she tells him that she understands they live under different codes and she shouldn’t hold hatred in her heart. Yuno gets a bit of time to refresh herself while they’re debriefing and collaborating with the writing team. She’s excited to be around the others by the time filming starts up again. Anyone who has anger towards Es lets it soften, feeling bad that they’re allowed to get a fun break while Es must remain asleep.

And I think Red and Kotoko would actually get really close in the au, despite their rocky start! They have very similar ideas on protecting the people they care about and being disgusted by those who abuse their power. Koto-koto duo is real!! 😤I can’t say for sure because so much could change in t3, but I’m hoping to write the two of them bonding over being labeled “the scary violent one” and slammed with a guilty vote next time ;-; 

If anything, Blue is more upset that she attacked Red than he is himself. (“That was our interrogation, what was she even doing there?”) And like you said, Shidou doesn’t want anyone to get hurt for real, so he pleads with them to keep their violence as staged as possible, going forward. He’s also extremely upset with Milgram that they’d let Es get hurt (since he’s the one who treated them afterwards). It takes such long time to assure him it won’t happen again, and that it was a one-time twist that Es signed off on beforehand.

Although I think the violence is going to get worse during this next hiatus, the au characters will actually feel less emotional, in my mind. After doing this for so long, I'm sure it would get easier to regulate which emotions are real and which result from too much immersion -- so there will be less to apologize and make up for this time, they're already very close and happy :')