#because no one gives a shit about translators!!!!!!!!!

[scopophobia-polaris]

So, to add on to Navi's post, because her whole read for the original was getting screenshots from the game to debunk what was said, of course....we are now here. I want to tell you that no one here disagreed with your conclusion about Ganondorf being a victim. What we here disagreed with was the method you used to get there. Simplifying Ganondorf down to solely good or solely evil is something this Fandom does all the time with little to no nuance. And even though you have written an eloquent essay, Published even! You twisted or outright made up parts of the game to get to your conclusion. In essay writing, that's called a logical fallacy, and the whole essay either twists what happens in the game or outright gets it wrong.

Now people are probably gonna wonder why I'm treating this like a big deal or why I'm speaking so blunt, because this is by all means very stupid fandom drama.

But I think when you're a college prof and you get an essay published and it's online for people to read everywhere without you, one, not giving the context behind Ganondorf's creation and the coding of his appearance and motivations, two the complexities of a corporate conglomerate in a notoriously socially conservative country taking aesthetics from countries who were historically colonized. And Three, The way that video games are a collaborative effort with usually no singular vision, this is very true at nintendo despite what people may think, and at any moment changes can be made for any reason by team leads or executives that would hinder or even hurt a story. It detrimental to the audience reading it that you do not provide them more of a couple of screenshots

Basically, many things go into a story and now I'm taking this more from a DOYLIST view right here talking about Nintendo. But I'm doing this because you keep trying to say..... well fuck man do I need to pull up more examples? Navi got them all, the whole essay is you trying HEAVILY to imply that Nintendo MEANT to do all of this, as in intentional in the story, idk I feel crazy, words have meaning, specific wording has implication, oh and this dosent even get into how localization can change things 😃😀 wording has meaning and sometimes translators don't have cultural contexxxtttttttt and to not even mention about Nintendo's history or even the short hand that comes from Ganondorf's design and the historical Orientalism behind it feels like a disservice to the paper, but much more qualified people then I have discussed the way Ganondorf is written and probably would love to discuss or link to previous writing again if asked.

And this is a cold take but Nintendo isn’t the place you should be looking to for deep story telling, they will always be a corporate entity first and the bottom line is a general audience, this does not mean JUST KIDS this means to a generalized population. And this is extremely cynical but a lot of people cant even handle the complexity of a female character who is mean, like Midna, do you really think people would handle a Ganondorf like how he is in Tp being portrayed in any form of film language as good????? This game dropped 5 years after 9/11, Nintendo was never gonna lose out in money like that.

And Dude people have given so much shit to HUGE fanartists and comic authors about their work portraying Ganondorf in a sympathetic light, you would of thunk more people would of picked up on Ganondorf's story being written as tragedy if there was something in the game that actually DID that. Maybe they would of written a blog post about how Midna saw Link kill Ganondorf and was ashamed of that or Ganondorf TOTALLY said the history of light and shadow will be written in blood thing before the final battle, you think people would of talked about huh why did Ganondorf say that there or something and maybe went 🤔 instead of it being argued that Tp Ganondorf had the weakest writing of the series until TotK threw a pile of flaming shit at my door with a picture of Ganondorf on it.

Navi also goes in depth on how Hyrule has not exactly stagnated like what was claimed in History of Light and Shadow by using the Goron merchants and Yeto as examples.

Rynling has stated that the cause of the stagnation and decline is due to an ineffectual leader that has "Not allowed its people to be revitalized by change and diversity."

Now I am familiar with the flaws of an undetermined national unity, I am very familiar with the subject, but I’m not going to speak like an authority. Id rather let someone much more qualified make that post and I link back to it, because i know its coming. But Navi said in her post that the idea of what could of happened at Arbiter's Grounds can completely blow over someone's head if they didn't play OoT first, and I think more or less this is accurate, certain things are lost in Wind Waker even with the recaps, but I wanna join in on this in my own way...

Rynling....you may say Hyrule has been on a decline during Tp......you may even think OoT had a more stable Hyrule or some shit.....i THINK YOU FORGOT ABOUT THE PLOT OF OCARINA OF TIME BAYBEEEEEEE

THE SUPPLEMENTAL MATERIAL THAT I CAN PULL UP TO PROVE MY SHIT ABOUT OOT HYRULE BEING DOG SHIT IN COMPARISON TO TP

Like if you're seriously gonna link me and Navi to your essay then I am about to go full BTW it's a Sativa and eat that bitch after midnight cuZ we YELLIN ABOUT OCARINA OF TIME ON THIS POST FOR EVERYONE🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟

All of Ocarina of Time's narrative is haunted by the civil war, the whole reason why Link is being raised in the woods is cuz of the civil war, the Sheikah are implied to have died out during the same conflict, and well its said that Hyrule was unified during it

Civil War yet the translators use unified the country like it WASNT under a sole ruler before? Hello? I need to go back through the Japanese script for the game again to see if i missed something of the game and freak it harder. And do realize the Deku sprout in this screenshot says fierce war but every where else, including the Zelda wiki (not fandom) its CIVIL War.

The Gate to Death mountain and Simultaniously the fence at Zora's river gives us and idea that peace was....tenuous at best downright hostile at worse given relations with the Gerudo

so today we gonna do some fun comparing and contrasting the Gorons and how they are treated in OoT to TP

and we gonna start with his racist ass BHJBHDBHKCJW

I mean, damn remmeber how mad Darunia is at Link for being the supposed royal family messenger? Link Unlocking the door to Darunia's room with Zelda's lullaby, I think it's a little funny that Darunia is hung up , you know, like he knows this is some disrespectful shit

Hey wannna hear some shit? The gates at the edge of death mountain aren't guarded by Gorons and were not built by them you can tell, the only way to visit the mountain is to get permission from the King to go up and not from the people that actually live there

God and like, there is something about the way Darunia locks himself in his room, like he does it to keep the ruby safe from all the other Gorons being so hungry that he's frightened they're gonna eat it, he doesn't know what to do on how to act about the Dodongos that Ganondorf summon on him for not giving over that rock. It qlmost sounds like when Ganondorf came in and Threatened Darunia, and that he (Darunia) sent a message to the royal family asking for help, why else would he be expecting someone to come meet with him?

"If I'm not mistaken, you came out here to eat the red stone too! Well, too bad! It's not here! What? That's not why you're here? You're looking for a "Spiritual Stone?" You must mean that delicious-looking red stone that was once displayed above the city! I was so hungry that I thought it would be OK to just give it one tiny, little lick...so I snuck up there. But it was already gone! I think Big Brother took it away. He always says that everyone is after that red stone! Big Brother has shut himself up in his room saying, "I will wait in here for the Royal Family's messenger!" this is a quote from the Goron that you can find on the middle of the rope bridge thing in Goron city.

Yeah so he sent a letter or something and no one answered yeesh.

contrast this all with TP where OH LOOKS WHO'S GUARDING DEATH MOUNTAIN

so in TP spoilers, this happens

Kakariko is more connected then ever! Renado here is wondering what the hell is going on with their FRIENDS. And yeah the Goron elder Gor Coron is trying to keep the last few people from kakariko left safe, and other Gorons, i mean, theyre keeping a piece of the fused shadow in there. also the way that entry into the temple goes in this game is cute, Darunia was freaking it cuz everyone is starving, but here Link wrestles his way up a mountain to ask the Gron elder whats happening since he was asked to come here by Renado, Gor Coron goes DAMN

unless......?

IDK ITS LIKE? ITS SILLY? Idk Hyrule isnt the best place but why try and act like this doesnt happen during TP?

so where am i getting at with this? the hell was going on back during OoT? If things are so odd and weirdly tense with the gates gaurds and non responses

"As time passed, the Triforce became a legend, and the different people of Hyrule forgot the laws and wisdom that the goddesses had left behind. Warfare and strife became common in Hyrule, as the armies of the Zora marched on the Hylians. The Gorons fought the Gerudo. It seemed every race of Hyrule was at the other's throat. Only the secluded Kokiri, sheltered by their magical forest and the Great Deku Tree, were spared the destruction of Hyrule's civil wars.

After 50 years of ceaseless combat, there arose a Hylian King of great wisdom, courage and power. Through his brilliant military campaigns and wise diplomacy, he was able to bring the varied people of Hyrule into a tenuous harmony. Treaties of peace were signed, and prosperity once again seemed to bloom in Hyrule. But no sooner had people declared peace in Hyrule than trouble once again stalked the land."

Tenuous Harmony, could you imagine if they dropped a line like this in Creating a champion? The tumblr side of the fandom would go fucking nuts with that info like OHHHHH SHIT WAS GOING ONNNNNN

This was ALL on the offical Nintendo Zelda website back when oot was the big game out, we have this cuz someone saved it to the wayback, THIS SCREENSHOT WAS FROM DECEMBER 14TH 2001, ABOUT A FULL YEAR AND A DAY UNTIL WIND WAKER WAS RELEASED IN JAPAN. THAT'S INSANE RIGHT???? ‼️‼️🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

And then it all probably got deleted once wind waker became the new thing!!! Or when they wanted to modernize and deleted it!!! THAT SUCKS RIGHT????

And what's worse is that it introduces some new info and also clarifies something. Hey you know when I made that post like damn Darunia racist as hell

"Warfare and strife became common in Hyrule, as the armies of the Zora marched on the Hylians. The Gorons fought the Gerudo."

NO WHERE IN THE GAME THE LEGEND OF ZELDA OCARINA OF TIME IT SAYS THIS, IT DOES NOT STATE THERE WAS CONFLICT BETWEEN THE GORONS AND GERUDO.....LIKE DIN GET YA KIDS.....IM LOOKING EVERYWHERE FOR SOMETHING I MUST OF MISSED.

But Like oh hey a fucking explanation to why he just fucking says that, I figure it was cuz of Ganondorf trying to almond mom all of them or that he kept talking to the King and well.....Navi already showed the GENERAL reaction to the Gerudo in castle town.

it went from oh hes just racist to dARUNIA AND GANONDORF HAVE HISTORY????

But the interesting one is why did thy Zora "marched on the Hylians."

Like sitting here like, I know a comic made in Germany shouldn't be a be all end all in shit I knew it never was and it would like. If you put this in warrior cats canonicoty categorization would be considered lower down supplementary material dubious canon, but their are things in the comic AND the Himekawa manga that behinds some behind the scenes actions given that LINK'S MOM HAS A MOSTLY CONSISTENT DESIGN WHAT THE HELLLLLLLL. And I always thought the Goron Zora war thing was stupid but Nintendo then had that out on their website, what the hell was going ON.

Because idk i didnt think much of Zora De Bon XVI and the Hyrulien King's relationship but

Now a days the Zelda website is much different and does not have lore pages like this anymore, it's more like a summary of the timeline. But yeah actually Nintendo approved shit, Hylian/Zora war.

Hyrule is progressing, its just going slowly, Hyrule is not AS stifled by its monarchy or a lack of integration during TP because Hyrule IS integrating, is people's are intermingling like is hasn't before during this game.

And this isn't even to get started on the E3 demo of Twilight princess that the trip that Link is supposed to take at the beginning of the game was to be the representative of Ordon at the "Hyrule summit

and Hyrule is described in a VERY specific way

Kingdom of Hyrule and neighboring realms? like theyre all not under the crown? so like???? FUN, that didn't end up making it in the game. the dailouge that is, But the remints is still there in the way the game is made up, like how OoT is built off is civil war bones

actually funny, Navi just got me screenshots of the way the dialouge was changed here

Like stuff clearly changed during the demo and finished game, I should of been touching more on the intricacies of how like shit was just change for no reason sometimes but uh....

But maybe @rawliverandgoronspice would want to one day like about games industry stuff if you ever want to 😭 I know you're super passionate on this and I wish I like even off hand mentioned something about how like TP is also effected by how games are made but I didn't and I'm a fool but games are complicated as hell and that post you made talking a bit about it was fun ya know 👉👈 and the Beta of Tp changes a LOT of stuff, one Rusl really is like a brother to link in the way he messes with him, it actually makes some weird Nintendo licensed shit saying hes like a big brother to Link made WAYYYYY more since with the Beta in mind, but....that also mean they tried to keep the big bro vibes....but then put the dad ones in there too like.....uh...did..someone not change his summary anywhere?

that was my big thing i wanted to talk about, navi's already touched on everything else i just think the parallels here between the Goron quest between OoT and TP changes in such a nice way.

And like this doesn't get into other shit about TP, like if we wanna deep dive into shit ya don't gotta do it by twisting the story, like I was going and talking to @blackautmedia to ask with some help when it came to like.......god idk what i even said anymore i was going a mile a minute. He wants to write his own thing on Twilight princess so im not gonna step on his toes but he has recommended Arabs and Muslims in the Media: Race and Representation after 9/11 by Evelyn Alsultany, the link I provided here is too her website and her page on the book this link here is from her own site that has a pdf of a part American Quarterly with a paper by the same name.

Anyways i wanna reflex for a moment cuz ive been up for hours finishing this because my brain wont stop unless i do. But the thing that by all means started this, was not your reblog linking me and Navi to your essay, or that there is 2 versions i found out where the paper published one had a lot more context to why you wrote your tumblr post the way you did, Navi helped me get the parts that were cut, please realize removing these does not remove the sentiment from the essay, its baked in.

fanfic, its a popular Fan interpretation that there was fighting between the Gerudo and Hylians after Ganondorf was caught trying to take the triforce, but this is not stated to of happened in the lore itself or even has evidence to back it up other then the Implications of Arbiter's grounds theory

UGHHHH AND THIS AGAIN "Twilight Princess Delivers a subtle yet poignant protest against neoliberal discourses of empire reflected in the rhetoric of heroism inform the geopolitical movements of Japan throught the twentieth century"

WHAT ARE YOU FUCKING TALKING ABOUT......

i dont mean this in a stupid ass way, im saying where the hell was about the protest thing, wait i really shouldt take from the published one cuz you actually dumbed down the line for tumblr

anyways again, where, Navi made it clear enough with her own post that, no, the way that Ganondorf is animated has no sympathy for him until the light is literally leaving him. Hell Twilight princess inst very kind to the gerudo either given that the only thing said about them is that they were thieves and nothing more. Like somehow OoT is more empathetic to the Gerudo, it doesn't just call them thieves, it aint great its not even good its just a bad portrayal of a people, and yet somehow OoT is willing to show the Gerudo in a neutral light at points then TP ever did.

but the reason i decided to just throw down a post is cuz i was pissed that you went after Ezlo for reblogging ME and NAVI's posts and purposefully misunderstood their fuckin wind waker post about ZELDA YOUTUBERS

dude you had them getting genuinely harassed by people with 0 reading comprehension that thinks a snarky reply to a tumblr post means its 100% correct. Webbed. Site.

anyways, I hope people don't take this as a right or wrong way to interpret a piece of work, as stated before, I read your essay, navi read your essay, you changed parts of Twilight Princess to get to the conclusion of you paper...And im gonna be real but it's kinda crazy that you're using post colonial melancholia for this when it's got some.....well something like idk i need someone to do a full ass review because there are point where i gently raise an eyebrow im gonna be real. but also like

like how do you read his book and then miss out on this, one of your whole big aruments is that hyrule is stagnate and not multi cultural and i had to grab screenshots and Navi had to get shit from the game.

like damn, do yall ever uh feel a strange sadness when dusk falls? i do. Idk this is one of the first and last times Nintendo ever delt with Ganondorf with some form a sympathy for him, cuz we got the dragon explosion in totk its like oh he's turbo evil now and he exploded you exploded him and yet the Gerudo probably still gotta pay for his shit from a billion years ago anyways idk idk idk pot shots at totk again.

I know you dug around a little for that post, and I understand from the numerous people that dmed me about that, you probably went on making an essay on their post so you could sound smart again.

And to be clear, I was told to drop some shit i was about to say about you because no one wants to start fandom drama, neither do I truly and any jab on the post itself would just be rude. people change and some people only learn to shut the hell up, so we'll keep it at that. I just hope you really don't truly recognize some of these people you started shit with.

So yeah tldr, uh.....idk, im going in for an autism screening in a month

also me watching the ending to windwaker cuz i wanted to say something about stong endings TP fans im sorry But Wind waker's ending hits no matter what best sequal to OoT thats isnt Majora's mask

The History of Light and Shadow

At the end of Twilight Princess, Ganondorf delivers one of his most memorable lines, “The history of light and shadow will be written in blood.” He is not wrong. As the player has witnessed over the course of Link’s adventure, Hyrule is haunted by ruins and ghost towns, a mere shadow of what it once was. The landscape is filled with numerous sites of past violence and empty spaces visibly marked by decay and wasted potential.

When Zelda tells Link and Midna that “these dark times are the result of our deeds,” she is referring to specific historical acts of imperialistic aggression. Hyrule established hegemony over its outlying territories by crushing the rebellions against its advances, but the kingdom has suffered from cultural stagnation as a result. Without the dynamic diversity symbolized by Ganondorf, Hyrule finds itself in economic and political decline, isolated from any contact with the world beyond its shrinking borders.

As a representative of a marginalized group of people who have been attacked and driven from their homes, Ganondorf is a tangible manifestation of the horrors of imperialism. He must be defeated, but doing so does not address the underlying problems that have resulted in Hyrule’s decline. I therefore want to argue that Twilight Princess uses Ganondorf to deliver a subtle yet poignant protest against the discourses of empire reflected by the dualistic “light and shadow” rhetoric of heroism that has resulted in tragedy and regret.

Keep reading

[garciaasfluffypen]

stop embarassing me! (she knows everything you're saying)

pairing: jemily x reader word count: 3k warnings: jj and emily find it very hot that you can speak italian, illusions to sexy times at the end request from this ask a/n: everything y/n says that's in italian is translated at the bottom of the post! that being said, everything was written with a translator so please excuse any errors. also, enjoy the lore drop ;)

your italian grandmother was in town, and you were quite literally going to shit your dick.

you had cleaned your apartment top to bottom roughly five times since the news that your grandmother was coming in the off chance she asked to stay at the dingy little place. granted, you hadn’t been there full time in months, but she didn’t know that. while you had a strained relationship with your father, you were very close with your nonna. she had been there for you through all the battles you had to fight against your father as a teenager, including all the battles where he didn’t want you to take care of your siblings simply because of who you were as a person. while he saw your life through facebook, that was the only access he got to you after you turned eighteen. you only kept that line available simply so he could see how your siblings were doing. and that was it. he had created such a big fuss when you came out the month before your 18th birthday that you decided you’d cut him off as much as you could. he tried to alienate you from the rest of your family, for pete’s sake. he didn’t get to know shit about you anymore.

the joke was on him, though, seeing as the rest of your family was cool with the idea of you being queer. granted, you hadn’t dropped the bomb about being polyamorous, but you figured with how well your support system in DC was going, it would be okay. you had told your little brothers about a month prior, and all they wanted to know about emily and jj was if they were treating you right. and obviously, when they could come meet them. your older brother was in the army, so it took a little longer to get a hold of him, but he promised to stop by DC whenever he had leave next so he could meet them. 

but this? this was your grandmother. it was absolutely terrifying to think of losing her. she was one of your only relatives left that could fight for you, and even though she was in her seventies you were worried about losing her. if anything, you were worried that she’d lose you first, but you didn’t want to think about that or else you’d start spiraling. you stayed alive for not only yourself and your siblings, but for her too. and you would probably cry if she said anything that even insinuated that she’d leave you. either way, you figured that you’d introduce her to them before dropping the polyamory bomb. it worked, since hotch said you could give her and your two brothers a tour of quantico this weekend and everyone except for you had been called in for a mandatory paperwork weekend.

you met up with your brothers and nonna outside quantico, slipping into the italian you had shoved into the back of your brain easily. considering it was easier to speak italian with your grandmother since your dad had never really learned it, it was something you just naturally did whenever you were around her. you weren’t sure how the team was going to react to it, but you’d cross that bridge when you got there. you got them all visitors patches and explained all your favorite parts of the building, showing them every little nook and cranny that you loved to hide in when you didn’t want to talk to people except emily and jj. making your way up to the bullpen, you felt a jolt of nervousness flow through your system. you didn’t know how your team was going to react to them at all. they had known bits and pieces about your older brother, but you hadn’t told them about your two younger brothers. that was a can of worms you weren’t sure you wanted to open around them yet. 

“nonna, before we go meet my team, they can be… they can be a little excitable.” 

your nonna shrugged. “nothing i can’t handle. i raised your aunts and uncles.” she paused. “and unfortunately, your father.” 

“you bring up a very good point. and don’t mind anything derek says. he doesn’t really have a filter.” 

“is he the one who likes football?” your youngest brother, colin, looked up to you. 

“yep. i’m sure he’d love to talk to you about it, depending on how far into the paperwork he is. and let me… let me handle the introductions, please. at least the first ones.” 

“of course, sweets.”

jj was one of the first people to realize you had stepped into the bullpen, seeing you walk in from where she was making her third cup of coffee in the kitchen. she was about to come say hi to you, but then she heard it. that beautiful, mid morning husk that you had whenever you woke up late mixed with… was that italian? she had to grab onto the counter to stop her knees from buckling as you talked to who she only could assume was your grandmother, since you had been talking about her all week leading up to today. she wasn’t sure who the two younger boys were with you, but she was sure she’d find out shortly. the keurig beeped, shaking her out of her thoughts as she turned around to grab her coffee, a stirrer going in seconds later. 

she felt a wave of want go through her body, and she had to physically stop herself from going over to you and ravishing you then and there in front of everyone you had spent the past five years working next to. she knew it was hot when emily spoke in other languages, but hearing you speak so fluently and so carefree, with that giant smile on your face? it was one of the hottest things she had ever seen you do. granted, a lot of the things you did were hot, but this? this took the cake. jj took some cool water from the sink and rubbed it on her cheeks, knowing all too well that her cheeks were most likely a crimson red from just thinking about you speaking in another language to her. you didn’t know much about that aspect of jj and emily yet, considering you only been exploring everything for a few months. she knew so much about emily, yet she felt like she didn’t know anything about you sometimes. 

“you done coffee-ing that stirrer?” luke leaned up against the counter, a smirk on his face as he watched jj. “you’ve been stirring for five minutes.” 

“have i?” jj let the stirrer go, watching it go around in the cup. 

“you seem distracted, are you okay?” 

“i… yeah.” 

while luke knew the general aspects of your relationship with her and emily, she didn’t want to delve too much into it while on the clock. he knew there was more she wasn’t saying, but knew not to push too much. but that didn’t stop him from joking around about how hard she was very clearly simping for you in the middle of the office. 

“are you gonna stare and gawk at your girlfriend or are you going to say hi?” 

“i will, i just…”

luke smiled. “i see. go to the bathroom for a sec, i’ll cover you.” 

jj scrunched her face as luke started laughing. “ew. you pervert.” she jokingly punched him in the arm. “it’s just… they speak italian.” 

“okay… doesn't emily speak italian?”

“that’s different. she’s not… she’s not them.” 

meanwhile, you had started to make your rounds, slowly introducing your nonna to your team. she found everyone quite charming, and it relaxed you quite a bit knowing that they all made a good impression. even hotch came out of his office, introducing himself and engaging in the conversations. it was nice, introducing one of the most important people in your life to your found family. the next part, however, was telling your nonna about emily and jj. colin seemed to catch on very quickly when he caught jj staring, but didn’t want to say anything in case your nonna didn’t know, but he would definitely be facetime you tomorrow to talk about it. the longer you talked with your team, the more you realized you were subconsciously searching for jj the whole time. emily was at her desk, but jj was nowhere to be found. which was unlike her, unless she had taken a late lunch. which would also be unlike her. 

“y/n!” penelope’s voice carried through the bullpen as she walked out of the round table room, smiling and bringing you in for a hug the second she got next to you. “i thought you weren’t coming in today? and ms ruthie! it’s so lovely to see you again!” 

you visibly relaxed at her touch, “hotch said i could show my nonna and brothers around today.” 

“it’s lovely to see you again too, penelope. did you dye your hair?”

“i did. just filled my roots in a little bit.” penelope chuckled. “nothing too crazy, don’t worry nonna.” 

emily stood up, a smile on her face as she walked over to introduce herself. “you said she was italian, right?”

“yep!” 

“ciao signora, piacere di conoscerti!” 

“she speaks italian?” your grandmother looked over to you, excitement in her eyes. “che emozione.”

“i do, i lived in italy as a teen.” emily smiled. “prentiss. emily. emily prentiss.” she held her hand out. 

“è una da tenersi stretta, ed è anche carina!” your grandma raised her eyebrows at you. “she speaks italian!” 

you couldn’t help but blush. “nonna! mi metti in imbarazzo.” 

“oh hush, i’m not embarrassing you!”

“considerando che lei sa italiano, lei sa esattamente quello che dici, nonna.”

your other brother, justin, piped in. “y/n has a point, nonna. if her coworker knows italian she’ll understand everything you’re saying. you’re not very slick with that.” 

“oh it’s okay,” emily chuckled. “it’s quite amusing.” 

“let me not be rude,” your grandma turned to the rest of the team. “i’m ruthie. i practically raised y/n since she was a baby.” 

“dang, sweet thing, i didn’t know you came with another language!” derek chuckled. 

“derek the next thing that comes out of your mouth better be appropriate for my seventy six year old italian grandmother to hear.” 

“i was going to ask if your girls knew about that, is all.” 

you rolled your eyes, knowing that not at all what derek was about to say. “no, they don’t, but they’ll be meeting nonna this weekend if everything goes to plan.” 

“who am i meeting?”

“le luci della mia vita, le ragazze che ho frequentato.” you couldn’t help but sheepishly smile as you caught emily’s eye. “one of them is right here, actually.” 

emily wasn’t sure if the blush on her face was any indication of how she was feeling, but good god it was sending her into orbit hearing you talk in italian. over the five years they had known you, the fact you knew italian this whole time was the most surprising. there were bits and pieces that they had been able to get out of you, but you were pretty secretive about your life before joining the bau. penelope knew most, if not all of your story since you two had been friends since high school, but that was all she knew. besides the fact that you turned her on so easily. that was a given. she tucked a piece of hair behind her ear as she watched you slowly try to explain to your nonna about how you were dating two girls, not just one. the way you took so much care in choosing your words, explaining everything as easily as you could… it was endearing. 

she couldn’t take her eyes off of you, not until jj came to stand next to her, knuckles white as she seemingly held herself back. your face lit up as you saw jj, launching into another tangent to your nonna about how jj had been one of the first people to befriend you when you joined the team. within seconds, the two women started having a silent conversation with just their eyes. they both felt the same way, it seemed, and they were both going a bit feral over this new side of you. although emily did appear to be hiding it a bit better than jj was. emily nudged jj’s knee with her own, shooting her a smirk that could only be read by two people. you and jj. jj bit her lip, having to physically restrain herself once again as you seamlessly switched back into italian, your eyes lighting up as you explained the dynamics of the team to your nonna. 

“so tell me again, who are you partnered with?”

“i go out in the field with either derek or matt.” you pointed to them individually. “matt’s role is unique, he also helps the IRT team so he comes and goes depending on if he’s needed internationally. we like to joke we split custody of him with the international team.” 

“and the tall one?”

“reid? he’s the brains.” reid awkwardly waved from his desk. “he usually knows stuff that we don’t. kind of like how colin knows almost everything about football.”

“oh yes, that makes sense. and what about the lovely ladies?”

“well you know what pen does, tara and jj do a lot of the interviews with families, and i always say that emily’s job is to sit there and look pretty, but she usually goes out in the field and investigates with reid.” 

“you all seem to be a well oiled machine,” ruthie started. “i’m glad you’re looking out for my y/n. they had a tough life growing up, it’s nice to know they’re supported here.” 

“oh they’re a pleasure to work with,” rossi piped up. “a welcome addition to the team for sure.”

as your nonna conversed with the team, you couldn’t help but glance over to jj. you forgot how much she adored it when emily talked in italian, but hadn’t even considered the option of how she would react when she heard you speak italian. to you, emily appeared to be holding in her need for you relatively well. her cheeks were flushed, sure, but she was also in a turtleneck in the office where they blasted the heat the second it got below 60. jj on the other hand… jj looked like she needed a cold shower. you had to hold back a chuckle as you caught tara’s eyes, who also appeared to have clocked her reaction as well. jj’s jaw was slack as she stared at you, eyes filled with lust. while your grandmother was distracted, you took the moment to squeeze her hand lightly to see if she was okay. tara took the opportunity to close jj’s jaw for her, shooting you a small smile as she did so. emily had to hide a chuckle, covering her mouth with a hand as she nudged at the blonde. you locked eyes with jj, your eyebrows raising as she stared back at you, her gaze telling you everything you needed to know. you weren’t going to go all bratty on her here, since you hadn’t talked a whole lot about boundaries outside of the house, but you were tempted. 

“i didn’t know you’d act this way, jayje. i would have done this way earlier if i had known.” you chuckled. “you got a thing for other languages?” 

“only from you and em.” 

you squeezed her hand, resisting the urge to kiss her. “i’ll make it up to you, i promise.” 

tara, picking up on the mood shift between you two, suddenly stood up. “hey, i was gonna go grab a soda, do either of you want anything?” 

“nah, i’m good. do you want anything?”

“i’m good too, thanks t.” you smiled at tara, waiting for her to leave before turning back to jj and emily. “i’m sorry i didn’t tell you guys sooner.” 

“don’t be sorry, lovey, it never came up.” emily shrugged. “i will be using this information to my advantage, though.”

“what, so you can converse in secret in front of me?”

“mostly about christmas gifts, but yes.” you joined in on the joke, a sarcastic hint in your voice. 

“your nonna is very sweet.”

“she is.” you smiled. “i’m sure she’ll love to talk about your time in italy this weekend when you guys come for dinner. she doesn’t know i’m not in the alexandria apartment anymore, i figured this would be the last hurrah before i ended the lease.” you shrugged. “if you guys don’t mind driving out there.”

“of course not, baby.” jj squeezed your hand. “are you coming home tonight, though? or are you staying at the apartment?” 

you stared at jj for a second, your eyes narrowing. you crossed your arms in front of your chest before tapping your shoulder, eyebrows rising as if silently asking her are you in control? jj slightly nodded at you before tilting her head, waiting for your confirmation. you tapped your shoulder again in confirmation, making sure nobody in the vicinity besides emily had decoded your silent conversation. 

“i’ll try. i’m not sure where my nonna is staying, but i’ll let you know.” 

“i want you home by eleven.” jj’s eyes darkened, voice dropping slightly. “no later.” 

before the conversation could take a turn, you felt a light hand on your back. turning to see justin, you smiled. 

“what’s up?”

“nonna wants to know what the plan was, are we heading back to alexandria?”

“i uh… i was hoping to stay here, actually.” you tilted your head towards jj in silent explanation. 

“does she know?”

“well, she understood the fact that emily and i were together, at least.” you chuckled as you caught your nonna talking to luke and tara. “not sure she picked up on jj’s obvious simping.” 

“either way, it is a drive back to alexandra so if we want to go to dinner, we should go now.” 

“you’re right, we should.” you turned back to emily and jj. “i’ll text you guys when i figure out where i’ll be tonight?”

jj narrowed her eyes at you with a devious smile on her face. “11pm, y/n. no later.”

with a chuckle, you stepped away, letting jj’s hand fall back to her side.

“i’ll do my best.” you smirked slightly. “we have dinner plans.”

translations:

nonna- grandmother

ciao signora, piacere di conoscerti- hello ma’am, nice to meet you!

che emozione.- how exciting

è una da tenersi stretta ed è anche carina! - she’s a keeper, she’s pretty too.

mi metti in imbarazzo- you’re embarrassing me

considerando che lei sa italiano, lei sa esattamente quello che dici, nonna.- considering she knows italian, she knows exactly what you're saying, grandma

le luci della mia vita, le ragazze che ho frequentato.- the lights of my life, the girls i've been dating

taglist: @jayden-prentiss @idkwhatever580 @multifandomlesbianic @softestqueeen @xx-spooky-little-vampire-xx

[mi-i-zori]

A Tiny World - 2

CoD - 141 x Snail (OC/Fem!Reader)

SYNOPSIS : Stardew Valley time with Snail, Gaz and Price.

Warnings : None. But please read the Author’s Note below.

Author’s Note : Snail is an OC that can be read as a Fem!Reader - I do my best no to describe her too much, but may sometimes say that she’s small (height) and has long hair.

I do not give anyone permission to re-publish and/or translate my work, be it here or on any other platform, including AI.

Aside from Animal Crossing, Snail really likes playing Stardew Valley.

Actually, scratch that. She loves it.

She bought the guide to make sure her farm is as efficient as possible. She planned it all thoroughly, from the kind she chose at the very beginning, to the animals and crops she wanted the have, where she would put them, and so on.

She’s got a part of her land fully dedicated to mystic trees associated with mushroom logs, because it wouldn’t be her farm if she didn’t make a gargantuan amount of profit based on them mushies.

The chickens, ducks and dinosaurs are all on one side of the road situated at the bottom of her farm, while the cows, goats and pigs are on the other side. All the tools she needs to make cheese, mayonnaise and dried resources are placed right next to each other, not far from the ponds. All the products she makes are close to a selling box, so she can sell everything right after collecting it.

She’s working really hard to offer tons of void mayonnaise to Kroby so she can ask them to be her roommate. For now, she’s got a cat named Mochi that’s always sleeping on her bed and proudly wears a green top hat she got on St Patrick’ Day.

Believe it or not, Price loves to watch her play. The whole setting of the game reminds him of the time he used to spend at his grandparent’s farm in the English countryside, all those years ago. He remembers helping them with all kind of crops and animals, and running across their land and the nearby village with other children his age. Good, simpler times.

He also has to admit that the way she organises her findings in the museum by colours is extremely satisfying to watch. And seeing her get all excited when she finally finds something new to add to her collection is also pretty endearing.

She also got Gaz to play too !

They help each other out with their farm - they’ve become pros at it, at this point. Both their greenhouses are filled to the brim with ancient fruits, which immediately go into an army of kegs to be brewed into wine. They make plans on how to deals with the upcoming seasons together.

They also switch consoles to help each other with the tasks they like the least. Snail isn’t really fond of going into the mines - she’d rather enjoy the rainy days and go fish and forage all around the game. Kyle, however, enjoys doing challenges into the mine more that running around trying to look for resources. So they efficiently help each other to level up and fill the chests on their farms with everything they need, sprawled on top of each other on their beds in a comfortable silence.

They rule over every single event in the game.

And they absolutely love gossiping about the characters - to the point that other soldiers on base think they’re actually saying mad shit about real people.

They don’t bother correcting them. Their confused faces as they realise they’ve been talking about marrying or divorcing three people in the same week make it all worth it.

It gets a good chuckle out of the team.

[weaponsdrawn]

HI i just remembered to respond to this FUCK ok so

I MASSIVELY AGREE with the binjpipe takes. i think ETS was good/iconic if only because it was so like. JARRING in a good way. but it was so lighting in a bottle tbh, and like u said it isnt rlly good horror. only rlly shocking if ur actually attached to cookie, which ppl are. cookie gets replaced by an AI tried to be ETS all over again, and it wasnt, and it kinda rlly showed, like you said, how they shine best with comedy. also I FULLY AGREE. fuck, im pretty sure its one of the reasons ive just grown tired of jackbox by now, both me and my gf (we met thru shared jackbox love), its bc every time binjpipe happened we were just like "THIS SHIT AGAIN?????" like it just made any sort of investment in it or hopes of cookie getting better just. feel so fucking moot. why bother getting invested if its just constantly going to get dragged back up. the "evil streaming service" joke is dead. its BEYOND dead. we havent even heard of the binjlady anymore. its lost any sort of omnious buildup. to me binjpipe's appeal was that it clearly wasnt going to last long. it was a nightmare that was just going to keep on ramping up until it crashed and burned horrendously, and fuck thats SO cool to consider and write about. but they keep dragging it out, and now its just sad. its boring. fucking. selling adult films?? give me a break.

ok about the party packs, HONESTLY SAME. like idk the writing is what really gets me about it tbh. i guess theyre good party games (tho i can get bored really fast, save for roomerang, and even so thats mostly bc of the goofyness of the responses), but YEAH youre so right. like idk if its because theyre ALSO doing the international translations but ithink it goes with the fact that the hosts severely lack character. when its like for some games, its ok if they dont have character (quixort), but its like that means theres A BALANCE. pack 8, ok? games like job job and weapons drawn, that CALLS for the hosts having character because its putting you in a situation WHERE the host is an active part of that situation. its like "wow im really in funny office" or "wow im really doing a murder!!!" right now, yknow? Push the Button, DODE was her own character and had noteworthy quips and she was a vital part of the games story/framing device! todd is iconic bc hes such a chill internet guy and then he sends you to hell! felicia is all morbidly romantic bc youre on a MONSTER DATING SHOW. a lot of the games stand out BECAUSE of the unique situations ur in that envoke unique prompts/unique gameplay, meanwhile something like fixytext? i dont know SHIT about the host. and its kind of a shame that the cannon jackbox lesbian host we have is SO FUCKING BORING GOD. most i can get is that shes introverted, but i gen cant tell if its genuine, if its some kind of "akward bacon unicorn moment! #millenial" type shit, what the fuck even really IS Fixytext at the end of the day. what makes it more than google docs shitposting simulator. its such a fucking shame, esp for the TENTH PACK. like god maybe they rlly do need to take a hiatus bc the change in. writing quality is. idk it just didnt help my dropping fixtation i'll say that.

also wait FR????? JESUS CHRIST thats actually a shame, i wanted to try and play that game!!! (namely bc funny objectum) and like. the ONE naughty pack exclusive host and we get NOTHING about her. i dont even like the fucking conch shell design im sorry. jackbox crew yall are great but how in this green unholy earth do you expect ppl to draw and remember your designs when your hosts are so. flat. fuck, mayonnaise, fucking M BUBZ, is more memorable than nickolas kranrker whatever and dr nanners and jerri, i cant tell you a SINGLE thing about jerri tbh. its such a shame. i want to love these guys i really do but theres nothing that endears them to me.

tbh if they end up not doing anything for ydkj it'll be funny in a kinda sad way tbh. on the one hand it'd BE nice on the other hand yeah its been nothing since full stream, eh. could they even do a YDKJ anymore? i remember once upon a time there was all this hype/discussion of a "ride 2" where the only real roadblock was that buzz's VA has well moved on from voice acting i think, but ppl had ideas for giving him a new voice, maybe even making it a transgender reason, all this stuff. this was like a couple of years back. but its like god i'd be shocked if they even remember guy exists at this point. or nate. hes sorta got a chance given his VA is literally a core part of the crew.

also i getcha. glad i could offer a space to let ya vent like that lawl

roomerang completely fucking fumbled with giving rue any sort of character we could've had a fun host we could've had that snark we could've had ANYTHING to match the sheer amount of swag in her design but we got BASICALLY NOTHING/very vague hints of character ("I'm beside myself... and I look good!" And "dramaaaa!!! :3") which is CRUMBS compared to even the most one note hosts like glargan o'toe or civic doodle's hosts and as petty as it sounds it's kinda the reason I fell out of love with current jackbox </3

.

[talizorah]

not gonna lie it’s hard to be like “yay artists standing up for themselves” when you see artists fighting against machine learning and artifical intelligence but you’re a translator who has been fighting (and losing) countless battles of artifical intelligence taking over your specific field of work while no one gives a shit

[simptasia]

LOST: Season One

[cator99]

I always get detained at da border because PROFUNC never ended but basically I'm like if a targeted individual didn't even care

[pricechecktranslations]

Just listened to the crossfade for mothy’s new album and it looks really exciting! I’m glad that mothy is branching out and trying new styles of music and storytelling. Also, I had a question that I’ve been wondering about for a while now. Do you ever feel overworked/burdened by translating stuff for evillious? I know a large portion of the fanbase relies on your translations and I don’t want you to feel obligated to do so rather than doing it out of genuine passion for the series.

I'm definitely really eager to see the songs in full myself. I'm getting the feel of a larger narrative in progress here, especially with the Flower of Happiness thing (since it's mentioned in more than one song).

No, I don't feel overworked doing Evillious translations. I actually have immense difficulty forcing myself to do things that feel tedious/uninteresting to me without some outside motivation like, say, money or my health, so if I ever felt that way about Evillious I probably wouldn't do them. Frankly after spending 5-6 years translating for 1-5 hours a day to catch up with the backlog of mothy's novels, going at the pace that he releases content is a cakewalk.

At this point in my life, no amount of social pressure can force me to translate if my brain doesn't want to. Even if it's something I've told someone I'll translate, and I genuinely wish to on their behalf, if I don't have that spark of interest and it poses even the slightest challenge, my brain will shut off focus after like 5 minutes. --Incidentally, I am sorry to people who have made requests and still haven't seen results. I have like 16 song translations in my drafts right now.

[chainsawworld]

Thinking of like. An actual pmd au with my guys and its great

[kamuro-junrenka]

So ive been obsessed with this minedai fanfic for a few months now and i asked the author i could translate it bc i read it like a million times and i wanted to do something with it and they gave me permission and man i really recommend translating fics bc you start appreciating things more and bc you have to read it very slowly as you translate and you imagine the scenarios way better, its actually very fun

[musical-chick-13]

Like, I DO think people get too wound up over fictional constructs--that, very pointedly, are not real and whose actions are made up and do not actually affect any real people--doing horrible things in-story, but I also think it's fair for someone to say, "This action sits poorly with me even in a fictional setting, in such an intense way that I cannot move past that or find sympathy for it," and "People are saying this bad behavior isn't actually bad, in a way that is meant to be taken seriously and at face-value, and that makes me severely uncomfortable."

Granted, this all gets muddled very easily because that's not what people mean most of the time, they just want to over-moralize fiction and say, "If you like this pRoBLeMaTiC thing for any reason, you are a menace to society" for Superiority Points. (They also like to invent problems that don't actually exist to "prove" that they have the moral high ground in not liking something remember when people tried to say catra/adora was incest because they grew up together because I sure do.) But I feel like there is a split between people who use "[character] apologism" in the sense of "I will be okay with this character doing whatever fucked-up thing they want in the story because I like them" vs "If you find this character compelling or want them to succeed, you would one-to-one condone their actions irl" vs "I have seen people genuinely say, with no joking or irony, that this character never actually caused any type of harm to the other characters within the story, and I don't like that."

[malachia-il-bibliotecario]

mi do fuoco :D

[two-calicos-in-a-trenchcoat]

...........If korok seeds.....are korok poop......what the fuck do koroks eat??????

[homiro]

#all weebs should be legally required to read about japanese imperialism both inside and outside the country that is now labeled as “japan”

Couldn't have put it better if I tried, prev.

The Ainu have not intentionally forgotten their culture and their language. It is the modern Japanese state that, from the Meiji era on, usurped our land, destroyed our culture, and deprived us of our language under the euphemism of assimilation. In the space of a mere 100 years, they nearly decimated the Ainu culture and language that had taken tens of thousands of years to come into being on this earth. ~Kayano Shigeru (1926-2006) Our Land Was a Forest: An Ainu Memoir

[prickly-paprikash]

Kendrick doesn't just hate Drake as a person. He hates the very idea of Drake.

Hip-Hop is rooted in revolution. In defiance. These are the songs of an oppressed group of people, and decades upon decades people have hated it. Accused of being meaningless and invalid. Media outlets took steps to belittle hip-hop and make sure it isn't recognized as an art form and as a means to fight back.

2Pac spoke of wealth disparity and inequality. Tupac was literally a member of a communist organization when he was younger and never stopped speaking against capitalism.

Lauryn Hill spoke of the struggles a woman faces. Not just women, but black women. Salt-N-Peppa. Queen Latifah. MISSY FUCKING ELLIOT.

N.W.A made sure people knew about police brutality and violence against the Black community.

And now, in this day and age, we're also experiencing an explosion of Queer Hip-Hop. Lil Nas X is at the forefront of this. Lil Uzi Vert came out as non-binary and uses they/them pronouns, even when they knew that a lot of their fans would never use it or even respect them for it. Auntie Diaries, a song about a young man who grew up in a transphobic environment and bought into those beliefs, but could never fully do it because his Uncle loved him so much and taught him a lot of life lessons, and that wisdom translated to him accepting his cousin as a woman as well.

Drake is none of that.

He's the perfect representation of what people think hip-hop is. Flexing. Posturing. Objectifying women. A fucker so insecure he bought 2Pac's ring just to feel like he's part of the black community. Rejected by Rihanna publicly. Tried to groom Millie Bobby Brown. Kissed and inappropriately touched an underage girl during his concert. His songs have inspired so many young boys to treat girls like shit. His belief that the amount of rings and chains and cars he has is the true meaning of success.

Additional Edit: This is my fault. If this post gains more views, then it would be remiss of me not to add to this. It was my fault to begin with, not stating this beforehand because while I did know, I got lost in celebrating Hip-Hop in a place that doesn't usually do so, and rightfully so.

2Pac did fight for wealth equality and better social living for the black community. He also has a long, long history of battery, domestic abuse, and sexual harassment against women. Specifically against women of color. He made a song to celebrate his own mother, but outright refused to give the same show of respect to other women in his life. His hypocritical nature was brushed off in later decades, just the way I did now.

N.W.A is the same. Sexual assault charges, violence—they spoke of Police reform, but refuses to give the same treatment back towards the women in their lives.

50 cent refuses to backtrack on any of his misogynistic lyrics.

Modern rappers of today, such as the dead XXXtentacion. 6ix9ine. Kodak Black.

I do love Hip-Hop. I love rap. And the music itself has always been anti-authoritarian at its core, because those are its roots. And I was happy that circles that did not normally know of it or enjoy it were getting into it, even for one thing like this rap feud.

Lil Nas X, Little Simz, Childish Gambino, Missy Elliot, Queen Latifah, Lauryn Hill—rappers who have at the very least consistently tried to put their money where their mouth is. Who have tried to act in accordance to what they rap and write and sing for.

@shehungthemoon @ohsugarsims finnthehumanmp3 were the ones who rightfully clarified in the comments. I know an apology won't correct my hypocrisy or my stupidity. I should have added all of this before making this post, but I wanted so badly to celebrate a genre of music but failed to do my due diligence in showing a better, holistic view of it. If anyone felt triggered, offended, troubled, frustrated or any other intense negative emotions surrounding this, please do block me. I'm sorry.

[cleolinda]

I am not the first person to attempt explaining this, but let me tell you about some of the nuances of Bless Your Heart™. It does not solely or even usually translate to “you are a dumbass.” It is more subtle than that:

It is primarily a thing you say to clarify (or falsify) the tone of what you DID say

OR

it is secondarily a thing you say instead of something ELSE to maintain 1) plausible deniability 2) a moral high ground.

“Bless your heart”: You genuinely deserve blessings because you are going through it right now and you need them. Gratitude, sympathy. “I’m going to have surgery next week.” “Bless your heart! Is there anything I can do for you?” (“Oh, bless your heart for asking.”) Original face-value meaning.

“Bless your heart”: You need a blessing because God knows you’re lacking (manners, intelligence, common sense) right now. Synonyms could include “Well, isn’t that precious” or “Well, that’s different.” It often comes in clutch when you don’t want to tell someone to their face that they fucked up. Your nephew has mowed the front yard for you. He has also mowed over all your flower beds. “Well… bless your heart.” If you were going to use it as a stealth insult to someone’s face for a more egregious occasion, it would be this category. It can be a mean girl move (the classic “It’s so brave that you dress like that” vibe), but it’s also a way of saying, “I want you to know that I see what you’re doing and I don’t approve of it, and you fully understand I’m expressing that, but I’m not going to give you the justification to clap back at me because I didn’t SAY that.” Someone wears a fancy white bridal-looking gown to your cousin’s wedding: “Well, bless your heart, that sure is a dress!” (If they understand you: “What’s THAT supposed to mean?” Because they know, but they want to make you SAY it. Combat engaged.)

“Bless their heart”: I am sharing news (gossiping) about someone but I like them and I want you to understand that I do, truly, bless their heart. “It’s been so hard for her after her father passed. Bless her heart, I’m gonna make her that red velvet cake she likes.”

“Bless their heart”: I am shit talking someone and I want to cover my ass, of COURSE I am just concerned for them. “She wore white to her sister’s wedding last week! WHITE! Bless her heart, I guess some people’s children just don’t know better.” (“Well you know they say she was always after the groom—“ “NO! Bless her heart.”)

That last one is the BYH they would need to deploy (but didn’t) in the Make Some Noise clip, but I feel like it honestly wasn’t necessary because the “prayer request” already served as a cover for talking shit. It probably would have come out if they’d been allowed to keep the skit going and they needed plausible deniability for spilling juicier details that maybe Jesus didn’t actually need to hear about. Thank you for coming to my Performing Southernness While Being Neurodivergent talk.