#because it's forcing me to stop and take care of myself by getting rest

[cherryswisherz]

KARMIC BALANCE ✷ CHAPTER III

✷WARNINGS cursing, pining??? idk. mention of the nd game and h*annah h*dalgo

✷NIYAH SPEAKS aye we back! this one is just paiges pob

✦✦✦✦

SENIOR YEAR

We lose to Notre Dame every year. 

Every. Fucking. Year. 

And now that I’m home in Storrs, looking at everyone as they try to mask their disappointment, I feel the loss even more. 

Which is why I’m walking around in the middle of night, the December air biting into my skin. I can’t stop thinking about everything that went wrong. Why everything went wrong. 

I honestly have no fucking clue why, but I know what went wrong. Everyone does. Our defense was lousy, our shots were horrible, we got too tired. I could go on, but that won’t fix anything. 

I find myself at Xavi and Janes house before I realize it. I tell myself that it’s because Yanna’s there, and not because of the wisdom that Xavia seems to have about every aspect of life. 

When Xavia opens the door wearing a smile and a moo moo, I ignore that bubly feeling in my chest and ask to come in. 

Once inside, I see her apartment is almost completely dark. The big lights are off, the living room being lit only by a candle and two lamps in opposite corners. 

“So, what’s up P?” Xavi asks, running her hands down the silk of her moo moo. “It’s almost midnight and you’re usually dead to the world by 9.”

Knowing that Xavia knows my bedtime makes me smile for reasons I don’t want to admit. 

When I first met her, Xavia was like a mystery. She was funny and smart and absolutely fucking beautiful. She’d apologized for making a false assumption about me. It was the first and only time anyone had ever done that and I never forgot it. 

When she and Jane started coming around more, I forced myself to swallow the want I had to learn more about her, to learn from her because I knew that if I’d gotten to the root of who she was, I’d be even more enthralled than I already was at that point. 

Eventually my heart stopped beating so fast around her. I’d stopped avoiding being within 3 feet of her and trained myself to treat her like I’d treated all my other friends. 

Because that’s what she is. My friend. 

It didn’t matter that her not worshipping ground I walked on excited me. It didn’t matter that almost every conversation we had alone rested in the back of my mind at all times. 

Xavia is my friend and that’s all she’d ever be. 

“Yeah I know. I just can’t get the ND game outta my head and I thought Yanna would be here to talk to.”

I’m lying and I know it. Whether Yanna was here or not, I would have found a way to talk to Xavi. I always did. Not because I wanted to be around her, but because she always had the answer to whatever problem that I have. Anyone would do the same if they’d stopped to pay attention when she was trying to get a word in. 

“Oh, yeah, she’s not here.” Xavi pointed a thumb to the back of her house, where Her and Jane’d bedroom’s were. Her locs swayed with the turn of her head. “Her and Jane went to Urgent Care cause she hit her shoulder on the wall and-” She waves her hands anxiously, as if she doesn’t feel like explaining a complex situation. “It was a whole thing. I’m sure you’ll hear about it tomorrow.”

I know I should be worried about my teammate who can’t seem to stay healthy. And I am. I make a mental note to check in on Yanna at some point, but right now, I’m thinking of a way I can stay and talk to Xavi without making it a thing.

“Oh…” is what I came up with. 

“You can talk to me?” Thank. God. “ If you want.”

Of course I fucking want. It’s all I’ve done for the past three years. 

I want to be a better person. 

I want to be 19 again and do everything differently. 

I want to win the championship this year. 

But all those wants are null and void for the biggest want of all. 

I want to get drafted to the WNBA.

And I’ve made  too many shitty decisions to get there to just throw it all away. So what if I’m miserable?

“Uh, yeah. That’s cool.” I play off my desperation and take a seat on her orange bean bag. 

Xavi plops down on the couch in front of me, crossing her legs and folding her hands. All her attention is on me and a part of me feels like I don’t deserve the attention of this amazing woman. But a bigger part is screaming that this is how it should be. 

Me, admiring every part of her, and her, willing and ready for anything I give her. 

Of course, in this situation all she wants is to know what’s on my mind, but I would give her whatever else she could think up. 

“So whatcha thinkin ‘bout?”  She asks sweetly. 

Her voice isn’t obnoxiously high. It’s kinda deep and mellow, just like she is.

“Um… I just can’t get over everything.” I shake my head and look at my hands. Hands that are supposed to get me everywhere I want in life.  “Like, I get why we lost. What we did wrong on the basketball front. But we were off the other day. We’d run those plays over and over again in practice. Studied film. We should have been prepared, but we were just off.  Like no matter how hard we tried, we just couldn’t get there.”

Xavia nods her head like she understands everything I’m saying. 

“Like everything was against you guys?” she questions. 

“No. I don’t think that anything was unfair. I think that our all just wasn’t enough.”

“Well, I know you can’t speak for anyone else, and I’d never ask you to. But why do you think you were off that night?”

She sounds like a therapist. The kind that isn’t just trying to fix you, but trying to understand you. The kind that hangs on to every word, but not to hold it against you.

“I don’t know. I just kept getting madder and madder and it threw me off. I did everything I was supposed to do.”

She looks confused now. “What do you mean ‘supposed to do’?”

“Like everything I thought was right. Everything I've always done.”

“Maybe that’s the issue.” 

Now I’m confused. 

“What?”

Following my routine has taken me and my team to the Final Four, and for Xavi to tell me it’s wrong stings a little. 

“Maybe doing everything you’ve always done isn’t the answer. Paige, you’re a somewhat mature adult. Do you honestly think you’re right all the time?”

What does she mean ‘somewhat’ mature? 

“...No?”

“Right.” Xavi sounds so sure of herself, leaning in and starting to talk with her hands like she does when she’s talking about her coursework or something equally as interesting to her. “It’s impossible to be right in every situation because every situation is different. When you throughout your daily life, do you treat every person the same? Do you go into every conversation with the same mindset, expecting the same outcome?”

I mean most people are the same, so what else am I supposed to do?

“Kinda, yeah.”

“Well that’s no bueno, babe.” She huffs out, pointing at me. Then, she entrances me again with her hands as she speaks. “ Every human is different. They have different pasts, and different views. Even if the difference between one person and another is miniscule, it’s there. And that difference is why it’s so important that we don’t generalize people.”

I know she’s stopped talking but I’m so caught up in her voice, and her hands and her face, and her to contribute to the conversation.

“Are you understanding?” She asks, seemingly genuinely concern with whether I’m comprehending what she’s telling me. 

And the answer is no, I’m not understanding. Whether there’s a differenc eor not, each person want the same thing and should be dealt with the same, based on what they want. 

This is the code fucking live by,a nd she’s sitting her debunking it in the most intellectual, attractive way possible.

“Not really.”

“Okay so like…” She sighs, pauses to think and then continues. “Do you remember when we first met? When I assumed you were a whore like alot of college athletes are?”

The reminder of our first interaction brings a calmness to me. I remember everything abou that night in her dorm. She wore sweats with no bra, and I’m pretty sure she was stoned.

“Yeah of course. You apologized to me that night and it kinda weirded me out.”

“Right.” Xavia snapped her fingers, bringing me out of my memory. “I apologized to you, because I generalized you and made an assumption based on one aspect of your identity. And I think it weirded you out because you’d generalized every person who’d made an assumption about you. I guess it’s rare that people apologize after being an asshole to you.”

It was rare. So rare that she’s the only person who’d ever done it.

“Okay…”

“So. Incourpurating that into basketball. Every team is different.”

I nod my head to let her know I was following. “Of course.”

“Okay and so every player on every team is different too.”

She lost me.

“No.” Now I’m the one leaning forward, talking with my hands. “They all move as a team. Yes, they have differences, but they’re all working together.”

“I see it differently.” She shrugs like she’s the master of basketball and done copious amounts of research on the psyche of an athlet.  “I feel like every player on that court moves individually. Do they play for the same team, and have the same goal? Of course. But they’re all different. They all have different thoughts and concerns and ideas. You said that girl Hannah was the head of the snake, but I think you should see it differently.”

“How so?”

“Instead of thinking of a team as one snake, think of it like… Like cheetahs!”

“Cheetahs?”

“Cheetahs.” She finalizes. “Once the mama cheetah gives birth, she trains her cubs to survive in any situation. To adapt to any surroundings. She teaches her cubs how to kill different animals, to hide, all that. Eventually, the cubs form a sibling group and go out together to execute everything their mother has taught them. Are you getting the analogy?”

When she’s explaining it in laymans terms, of course I get it. She could probably explain thermodynamics to me and I’d understand it fully. Xavia just has a way of making everything in life seem so simple. It’s wonderful, really.

“Yeah. Like the coach is the mother, the players are the cubs.”

“Right. But each cub is different. There’s a more dominant one, there’s submissives and then theirs the runts. Each one has to edit their mothers lessons to make it useful to them individually. Does that make sense?”

I’ve decided that she’s blown my mind enough for tonight, once again by being right about everything. So I just chuckle and dismiss the topic.

“How do you come up with this shit, Xavi?”

She laughs like a seductress and leans back on the couch, “I dunno. I read alot.”

You read alot? Reading alot has given you the ability to break down a sport like you’ve played it your whole life?

“Well thank you for sharing your knowledge with my dumbass, oh wise one.”

I stand up from the beanbag and make my way to the door, ready to take my exit.

“I’m not wise, I just see from a different point of view than you. Sometimes you gotta get outta your head.”

“I guess.” I sigh, then open my arms. “Thanks, Xavi.” 

She steps into me, her head just below my chest and wraps her arms around me. Her body is warm, but the silk she’s wearing cold. She doesn’t hug me tight or aggressively. Just stands there with her arms around my waist. 

It feels terrifyingly comfortable. 

“Anytime P.” she mutters, pulling away and ushering me out of her home. 

The whole walk back, my mind is on her and everything she said. 

How is it that this girl that is the exact opposite of everything I’m looking for, seems to be everything I need?

✷TAGLIST @patscorner @riyahtheballer @mattslolita @thaatdigitaldiary @janaelalfysblunt @mrsengstler @kmoneymartini @sageworld

@darkskinchristiandiorpostergirl @justliketoreadsowhat @pb524830 @pb524830 @dnftpn @sierrale8ne @numberonepartyanth3m

@pppaaiiiggggeeeeee @uwupaige @paigeluvvr @colorthecosmos444 @authentic-girl03 @makethemhoesmad @lovegalor333 @mrsarnold

@sellasstories @heart4caitlin @avvwritesstufff @st4rrzynight @bueckersp @paxaz535 @thelightknight21 @paxaz535

[iguessitsjustme]

I Saw You In My Dream Ep 2 Thoughts

Okay I just finished episode 1 and I immediately had to jump into episode 2. Obviously. I got my donuts. I got my pringles. Let’s just dive right in. Liveblog under the cut:

Oh Ai and the sex dream. Love it. Okay Ai, now listen to me. Do not do what I did when I had a sex dream about a friend when I was in high school. Now listen. I had a sex dream about a same sex friend. And then I immediately told her and I was like “weird, right?” and she was like “sex dreams are completely natural! thanks for being comfortable enough with me to share that!” and I need you to understand that I did not have feelings for my friend. So cut me some slack. But it still took me another fucking decade before I realized I was attracted to women. All my personal gender shit aside, don’t do that Ai. Listen to your subconscious. For it knows. And that has been oversharing time with Rae. (btw she is still one of my best friends to this day.)

Ai. Please tell your friend about your dream. He can’t give you advice if he doesn’t know.

Ai, hate to break it to ya, but you can’t research away the gay thoughts. Them suckers here to stay.

See my guy? Gay thoughts. Once they take hold they are there forever. Worry not though. Gay thoughts are your friend. Gay thoughts love you. Gay thoughts just want you to be happy.

If I were to make a prediction, Yu has liked Ai for pretty much his entire life. Now Ai is catching feelings but Yu has no idea and just thinks his crush is one sided. And if that’s the case then I am HERE for it. If that’s not the case then I am also here for it. I’m here for whatever.

So Ing is just the cutest boy who ever lived with the cutest little crush on his friend. The way he was smiling at that towel? Unmatched cuteness. I feel like I need to pinch his cheeks or something.

Rae vs the internet that doesn’t want to load. What have I done to deserve such suffering?

It’s working again yay! Now I can see Ing’s reaction to Ai’s prophetic dreams! Woo!

Someone tell me what this title screen reminds me of? I feel like there was another show with similar fonts and color palettes but I cannot for the life of me figure it out.

LIL BOY SDIGHKSLHFGKDJFHKJH

Give the translators a raise I swear to god

I’m obsessed with this framing.

Well this music, despite sounding nothing like this song, got a song stuck in my head. Took me a minute to figure out why but the song stuck in my head is The Sky and The Dawn and The Sun by Celtic Woman and if you don’t know the song there’s this bit that goes “I am the sky and the dawn and the sun I am the sky and the new day begun” and up until the very last note in that verse, it is the same little melody playing in the show. Very completely and totally different vibes. If I had the spoons one day, I might use this as an example for how even the same notes can sound different in different hands with different interpretations and how music can change even if technically the melody is the same. Because if I played both bits for you, they sound extremely different. But the notes? The same. Or at least the melody is. Not sure of the exact key of each but they have to be relatively close in key if not the same (it’s been awhile since I listened to that song by Celtic Woman) (also also the music around that one specific section is completely different. nothing at all alike)

Oh now see this is fascinating because if Ai didn’t have the dream, he would not have gone to the park and this would not have happened. Right?

The music in this episode is getting me. It is so much better than last episode. So, so much better.

See, here’s the thing. I desperately want to watch episode 3. But I have to work tomorrow. And I’m getting over being sick. So I need rest. But I want to watch episode 3 so bad. Tomorrow. I can watch tomorrow. It will be fine. I can be patient. I can wait. Luckily, work will be busy so the day should pass by quickly.

[planetarytransformation]

so many of the transfems i know spent their time pre-transition performing a kind of lifelong exercise in self-deprivation, the goal of which was to find out exactly how little a person needed to live. they starved themselves, dressed carelessly, shunned friends, and hollowed themselves out so as not to be burdens on anyone but themselves.

i see it now, too, in the girls around me. i'll ask if they want care – a home-cooked meal, relaxed company, sex without the expectation of reciprocation – and they say no, no, thank you, i don't need it; what would you like, what do you want, because in their head they're still doing that awful calculus, still training themselves to disappear in the eyes of the people around them.

i don't think i'd have died without transition – not in the conventional sense, at least – but to take that leap, i had to stop thinking of myself as a human experiment in fuel-efficient living and start nurturing the anemic, atrophied flame of desire in my heart. i had to learn to eat well, to exercise, to style myself beautiful, but harder than that, i had to learn to ask the people around me to work on my behalf in order to enrich my life and give me the things i wanted.

and i did it; i learned. and it was agony, but courage is a muscle you can train, and every day i get better at accepting gifts with the hungry gratitude i never learned in my years and years as a sad, scared, lonely boy.

so be patient with the trans girls in your life. better than that: be proactive, attentive, generous; be forceful, if you have to, and learn to distinguish real discomfort from the terrified reflex of self-denial that so many of us once learned to rely on.

and if you are so lucky as to love a trans girl, you must insist upon her. you must insist upon her happiness, her comfort, her pleasure, and her rest, because she may still not yet know how to make those demands for herself. if you can devote any amount of energy to becoming an engine that nurtures the flame of even a single tgirl then there is a place for you in trans heaven, which as far as i'm concerned is the only one worth going to

[cntloup]

Gojo Satoru x pregnant!reader

protective!Satoru, fluff, a lil angst, mention of feeling guilty, implied heavy symptoms experienced by the reader

"it's ok, baby. i've got it." Satoru says as he approaches your slouched form over the sink, washing the dishes as you try to get something done and make yourself useful.

you've been feeling guilty during the past month or so, feeling like you were a burden to him, thinking that you would never live up to his expectations. now he has to take care of you. and as time goes by, it will get even worse as your pregnancy progresses. but he's a busy man with heavy responsibilities. you'd be only holding him back. you torture yourself with these thoughts every day.

"oh, thanks. i'll go clean up the living room and do the laundry then." you respond with a forced smile, trying to mask the guilt that's been gnawing at you for a while as you try to keep yourself from falling over out of dizziness.

"what? no, wait! i'll do it after i wash the dishes. you go get some rest. you've done enough." he retorts while gently grabbing your arm, voice slightly raised to stop you immediately.

he is in utter disbelief at your behavior. you should be resting right now, tucked in beneath the soft sheets peacefully. you shouldn't worry your pretty little head about anything, he thinks.

"i haven't done anything all day." you utter in a faintly frustrated tone, mostly at yourself.

"and that's exactly how it should be." he replies with a nod, "now go to bed before i drag you there myself." he adds, maintaining a playful tone, a soft smile adorning his features as he drinks in your beauty. you're already glowing. but considering how observant he is, he senses your discomfort immediately like he can actually feel the gloom and sorrow you're feeling right now like a mother hen.

"what is it, baby? tell me." he murmurs as he walks up to you and pulls you into him by your hips, shining blue eyes staring at you as he awaits a response.

his hand rests on your side as the other cups your jaw, his thumb swiping over your cheek that could be dampened any moment now as you feel tears threatening to spill.

"i'm so sorry." you whisper breathily, voice slightly quivering with the lump in your throat as you look up into his glowing eyes.

"for what?" he asks, confusion evident on his features.

"for being weak. i'm so sorry to disappoint you." you finally spill out the words that have been weighing heavily on your chest as the tears cascade down your glossy eyes.

"disappoint me? i don't understand... why are you crying, love?" he mutters with a shake of his head, his confusion growing even more by your words as his fingers swipe over your cheeks to wipe away the stray tears.

"you're literally the strongest and you're stuck with me. i'm barely even showing yet and i'm feeling extreme fatigue. i've been sleeping all day for the past month cause i can't do anything. and because of the symptoms, i'll probably have to quit my job." you ramble about the thoughts that have been pulling you down all this time.

"wait, wait, wait! how long have you been feeling like this?" he questions with widened eyes baring into your soul.

"eversince we found out i was pregnant. i can't stop feeling guilty about disappointing you." you reply quietly, almost embarrassed to admit it. of course you know you're being irrational. it's all natural to be tired during this time and need help, but you just can't help it.

"you've been feeling like this all this time and you didn't tell me anything?" he blurts out almost too aggressively to his liking, "sorry. didn't mean it to come out that way." he quickly apologizes after witnessing the slight flinch on your part.

how could he not see it? you've been trying to do the chores like regular, pushing yourself to your limit both in the house and on your job until he swoops in and takes the weight off your shoulders. now he starts to blame himself for not finding out sooner and letting you wallow in your own sadness and guilt all alone.

"you're not weak, baby. you're doing the one thing that i can't possibly ever do. the one thing that the strongest can't do. and what does that make you? huh? you're literally the strongest of all, babe. i can't even fathom what you're going through and you're doing amazing-", "i'm barely functioning." you cut him off.

"i'm not done yet, babe." he says playfully before continuing, "you're doing amazing, honey. you sleep not because you can't do anything else but because you need it. you're carrying our child for fuck's sake. a literal human's life is growing inside you and of course it takes its toll on you. and i'm right here beside you every step of the way." he finishes his loving speech with a tender kiss on your forehead as his strong arms wrap around your now slightly shaking form as you sob, utterly moved by his words and also the hormones.

"thank you, Satoru. i really appreciate it. you always know what to say when i'm feeling down." your words are cut off by loud sobs but he patiently waits for you to finish as he rubs your back soothingly while nuzzling his face in your neck.

"any time, baby. i love you." he whispers in your ear, "i love you too, toru." you say back, continuing to sob in his arms for a while before you eventually calm down and he guides you to bed, encouraging you to take some much-needed rest.

"and don't worry about your job. you can take some time off or quit altogether. i have more than enough to pay for our family and the next generations to come-", "ok, stop bragging!" you chuckle, "i'm just saying, baby. i've been dying to spoil you. now's my chance. let me take care of you. you don't have to go through this alone. in fact, i won't even let you." he chuckles lightly and crashes his lips onto yours, pulling away with a loud smack as you both lay in bed, limbs tangled together, "you already spoil me." you mention with a slight pout, "and i'm gonna do it even more. you deserve it, baby. don't worry about anything. i've got it." he says while softly caressing your cheek, admiring your glowing beauty illuminated by the faint bedside light.

you slowly start to feel the sleep creeping in and drift away into a slumber as you mumble a quiet 'thank you', curling into Satoru's side as he holds you so lovingly while you think to yourself how you've been blessed with the best, most loving and supportive partner anyone could ever ask for.

[fable-x4]

Doing this because it makes me happy •Ꮂ•. Im making it difficult on all of you though.

1 note- I'll go drink water

10 notes - I'll set alarms to actually care for myself

50 notes - set up a daily productivity system so I stop wasting my time doing nothing.

100 notes - ask my friends to help me buy a skirt

500 notes - get a bra & a whole bunch of other affirming clothing !!!

1k - tell my dad that my gf is also trans

2.5k - ask my dad to address me by my prefferred name & pronouns 1k went pretty poorly, so I dont feel super comfortable making an attempt on this.

5k - try to get therapy/psychologist

10k - girl mode at all times (start actively wearing makeup/clothing/doing voice training around people at all times)

50k - try for HRT (0% chance) (also no guarantee on this one)

Asfgg. It feels surprisingly good to have a bunch of strangers who want me to be happy

I have now set up alarms for eating, waking up, and hygene related stuff. I seriously doubt we get to 500, but this has made me significantly happier •Ꮂ•

Doing some math... 25 notes in 4 hours. 6.25 notes per hour. 8000 hours or 333 days until this hits 50k. Hrt in a year ig.

Um. Wow. Its been a day, and we're almost at 300. Everything 500 & below was supposed to be things I'd do with minimal intervention. But now, we're getting to the scarier stuff. I am very intimidated, but also excited

My gf really badly wanted to be here when I buy some of the clothing, so the skirt will be this week, the rest of the clothing will be when she comes back from vacation

Saying that you're force femming me is so not allowed. This is unfair. You have no right to make me feel the ways Im feelingggg. Stop making me happy.

Welp. I told him about my girlfriend. And things went about as poorly as expected. He said that Im parroting what other people think. Slowly taking little parts of them, and applying them to myself. Specifically, being trans. He didnt even leave it to maybes. He said with certainty that I was copying everyone else. I know 9 trans people total. Only 2 of them are my close friends. Everyone else, Im barely aquaintences with. I should have told him that regardless of whatever theories he has, this has boosted my confidence massively. Slightly less excited for 2.5k notes. At least everything after that is very positive. And at least this lets me talk about my girlfriend for ages. I dont have to say her deadname through gritted teeth. Oh context. He already knows Im trans but was ignoring it.

I GOT A SKIRT!!!!!

Thank all of you so much. At first when I got the skirt, I was pretty intimidated by the idea of showing my legs. I thought everyone will just see me as a man. But there's a degree of confidence you all have given me. Yeah. Im pretty. Yeah, Im beautiful even. Yeah. Its a friggin fantastic skirt. And anyone who thinks otherwise is dumb. Im happy, and thats what matters.

[seungminhour]

[💭] thinking about the types of hugs bf!skz would give you

◞✩ pairing : bf!skz (individual) x gn!reader

◞✩ contains : lots and lots and lots of fluff and hugs and just the boys being so smitten lol, probably some typos, i have not looked over this too well

◞✩ notes : this has been in my drafts for ages, but i never got around to finishing it lol. also, i wont lie, i loved writing in this little bulleted style. im gonna have to write more silly little things like this! anyway, i hope you all enjoy 🫶

01. bang chan - bear hugs

will open his arms and just let you launch yourself into his embrace no matter the mood you’re in

you’re sad? he just opens his arms silently and lets you come to him on your own terms

you’re seeing him for the first time since he left for tour? opens his arms and lets you come flying to him - catches you every single time

literally engulfs you completely

gently rocks you back and forth when you need it, running his fingers through your hair and whispering sweet things into your ear

“shh, baby it’s going to be okay. you’re fine, i’m right here if you need me”

definitely the type to cup your face, wipe your tears away and tell you to “turn that frown upside down” with the sweetest look on his face (it works every single time of course bc your bf is just so sweet and loving and caring and you can’t help but crack the smallest of smiles at him)

tries so hard to shield you away from the rest of the world by being in his arms

also uses it as a way to annoy you

will come up behind you while you’re trying to do something and just drape himself fully over your back

won’t get off until one (or both) of you end up on the floor

02. lee minho - back hugs

i Really have been thinking about back hugs and lee know recently, like it’s taken over 80% of all my thoughts

he especially loves back hugs in the mornings, like i’m talking clingy in the mornings

sometimes you wake up before him and you’ll be cooking breakfast for the two of you and he’ll quietly sneak up behind you and wrap his arms around your waist and just watch as you cook

do NOT try to get him off of you, because he Will retaliate by digging his chin into your shoulder to get you to stop wiggling

you’ll feed him little bites over you shoulder while asking if it needs anything

he’ll do his cute little “mmm!~” and shake his head against your shoulder

you wake him up while while you’re trying to get out of bed? good luck because he’s reaching up and grabbing you by the waist to drag you back in

“where do you think you’re going? it’s not time to get out of bed yet”

holds you there until one or both of you fall back asleep

loves to stand behind you and watch you do your nighttime routine too

asks so many (of the same) questions just because he likes to hear you talk

gets all doe eyed while watching you explain to him the benefits of one face mask over the other

he really is just smitten

03. seo changbin - picks you up and spins you around

this man. oh my god

you cannot convince me that he doesn’t love to pick you up and just take you places

like if you wanna go somewhere and you’re sitting down, be prepared for him to just lift you up and take you where you need

time for bed? he will gently pick you up off the couch and bring you to bed himself, just because he can

absolutely looooooves when you get all flustered by it

“binnie, i can walk myself you know?”

“just because you can, doesn’t mean you should”

is alllllllll about the princess treatment

as a result this translates over to his hugs 100%

literally almost knocks over the guys when he sees you come in the practice room one day

sprints full force at you until he’s scooping you up in his arms to spin you around and around until you’re breathless and dizzy

loves to pick you up and gently sway the two of you when you’re not feeling the greatest

if you come home upset and he’s there, he’s immediately picking you up and rocking you side to side as he runs his hands through your hair

sometimes you want to talk about what’s made you this upset, other time you don’t, so he’ll just hold you in place until you tell him what you need - whether that be a warm bath to relax (which he carries you to) or to be let down so you can pace and rant about how shitty of a day you had

04. hwang hyunjin - buries his face in your neck

he just wants to be as close to you as he can possibly get

loves loves loves the whole skinship of it

sooooo many neck / shoulder kisses!!!

so soft and sweet about it :(

he’ll gently hold you face in one hand while he moves you hair to the side with the other so he can make space for himself between your neck and your shoulder

always leaves at least one kiss to your neck before he rests his forehead there

“you know, hyune, you can’t just hide in my neck forever. at some point you need to come out”

will literally pout, shake his head and shove his face closer to you

he’ll fall asleep like that too

if you two have a movie night on the couch, be ready for him to lay directly on top of you, shove his face into your neck, and then promptly fall asleep within the first 20 minutes

the list of unfinished movies you guys have is astronomically long because this happens so often

you can tell if it’s been a bad day when he comes home and immediately goes to hide away from everything in your neck.

you just hold him there for as long as he needs

sometimes he will talk about it, other times he will just sit there, quietly sniffling while you comb your hands through his hair to bring him a little comfort

05. han jisung - clings to you

i will forever and always stand by the fact that han jisung is one clingy motherfucker okay

like i’m talking he launches himself at you the moment you step through the door when you get home

will not let you go for at least 5 minutes

“hanji, babe, can you at least let me put my things down first?”

the little fucker would hold you tighter and pout “nooo, i just missed you so much, wanna hold you for a few more minutes”

definitely calls it his “recharging time”

will 100% get all whiny and pouty if he doesn’t get to hug you for as long as he wants to

somehow manages to be the worlds biggest blanket hog and the worlds biggest cuddler at the same time

half the time you wake up freezing cold on one side and burning up on the other from where he has cocooned himself in all the blankets and then clung onto you for dear life

does not shy away from sticking to you in front of his friends

if you guys have a movie night with everyone in the dorms, he is not content until you are sat in his lap with his arms wrapped around you and his head pressed against yours

bonus points if it’s a scary movie and you sit sideways in his lap so you can hide your face in his neck when it gets too spooky

06. lee felix - squeezes you

this man just has so much love and happiness to spread, he can’t help but squeeze the life out of you every time he sees you

it doesn’t matter how long it’s been either

a day, a week, hell even if you just go to take a shower and come back he’s squeezing you as soon as you return

most definitely shakes you a bit while holding on to you for dear life

grabs you and does the fully body vibrate thing just to annoy you

sometimes he gets a little carried away and you’ll have to remind him that you actually Do need to breathe at some point

“lix, baby, i can’t- i can’t really breathe-“

“oh!” he’d giggle bc ofc he would, “i’m sorry baby, sometimes i just forget how tightly i’m holding you.”

gives you tiny reassuring squeezes when you need them tho

he can somehow always tell when you’re having even the slightest of bad days

also can tell exactly what kind of squeeze you need

if you come home upset, he’s right there to grab you and hold you tight, kissing the side of your head as the tears that have been building up all day finally come crashing down

tries to physically squeeze the sadness from you because he hates seeing you like this :(

if you come home mad, he’ll sit with you while you rant about your day and offer small, reassuring squeezes to your shoulder to show you he’s listening

07. kim seungmin - rests his head on / against yours

idk smth about seungmin just screams that he loves to rest his head on or against yours

and if he’s tall enough to place his chin on the top of your head? oh he’s giddy about it every single time

loves to wrap his arms around your shoulders from behind, place his chin on top of your head, and just stand there like that

is also a little shit about it ofc

“you’re so short, i can see clear over your head. how embarrassing.”

“yeah, but you love it.”

he does indeed love it.

he loves that he can rest his head against yours if he needs a little recharge and he loves the smell of your shampoo and he loves how close your temple is for him to kiss

oh that’s another thing

he will kiss your temple / forehead any chance he gets - like it’s literally his favorite thing to do

when you really need comfort, he’ll pull you close and kiss your forehead before resting his against yours while you try to forget how terrible of a day you had

softly knocks his head against yours just for the fun of it

he loves to hear you giggle and get tripped up on your words when he does it, so he’ll keep doing it until you physically have to pull yourself out of his embrace just to finish your story

08. yang jeongin - waist hugs

i just really think he would be the type to wrap his arms around your waist and never let go, ya know???

like he would always be holding your waist in some way when you’re out in public just to make it easier to tug you into his arms whenever needed

loves loves loves to slowly move his hands from your sides to your back just to tease you a little bit

will 100% use giving you a hug as an excuse to start a tickle fight tho, so always be on your toes

he’ll sneak up behind you, snake his hands around your waist while acting like the innocent and sweet and loving bf he is

and then as soon as you let your guard down he’s going in for the kill, digging his fingers into your sides and tickling the life out of you

won’t stop until you call mercy

“i’m going to have to take away your hugging privileges if all you’re going to use them for is to tickle me.”

“you wouldn’t dare to take them away. you love my hugs far too much for that.”

walks away all smugly because he know he’s right. you would never deny him a hug, even though you know the risk of it ending in tickles

loves to gently run his hands up and down your sides while he’s listening to you talk

he’ll definitely slide them under the hem of your shirt

sometimes this is to place his freezing cold hands against your warm skin to make you jump, other times it’s to provide comfort when you need it

he’s slide his hands under you shirt and gently runs his hands up and down your bare sides and back when you’ve had a particularly rough day

[halfvalid]

Hiii! If its no trouble could I have a zoro and reader fic with the one bed trope? The others know about their crushes on each other so they force each other to share a room? Anyway they end up cuddling and its all cute (the others will tease them forever about it lol)?? Thankss

intertwined ribbons

ABOUT

alternate title: opla zoro makes my hated tropes less hated

rating: general audiences/teen & up

characters: live action!roronoa zoro | fem!reader | live action!nami | live action!straw hats ensemble

pairing: live action!roronoa zoro x fem!reader

word count: 4.9k

description: unbeknownst to you, your crush on zoro is reciprocated. the rest of the straw hats take it upon themselves to get you together by locking you in his bedroom overnight.

tags: strawhat!reader, only one bed, forced proximity, confessions, no use of 'y/n', nami is a true instigator, cuddling, soft zoro, humor

author's note: thank you so much for the request and i hope it meets your expectations!! fun fact i actually used to hate the 'only one bed' trope, so i decided to challenge myself in writing this. and i think it's one of my fave tropes now lol

(you have an inner spirit that helps you make decisions except it’s just nami.)

“I just think that maybe you should stop avoiding him,” Nami started. You bit your cheek, ignoring her as you tied up the last of the ship’s rigging into a careful knot. Nami had been going on for the past few minutes, and you’d zoned out exactly three seconds in, when the name Zoro had first been spoken. Because of this reason you weren’t really listening, so you blinked up at her in confusion. 

“Sorry? Who am I avoiding?” 

“You’re impossible,” Nami grumbled. “And you know exactly who I’m talking about.” Which, well, fair. The math added up: you heard the word Zoro, you stopped listening, Nami continued talking until she realized you’d stopped listening. “Especially since you’re, you know—” she gave you another look, eyes rolling over to stare dead into yours— “Avoiding him.” 

“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” you said innocently. Nami sighed, leaning over to tug the rope dangling from your hands out of your grip. You tried to reach back for it, but she didn’t let you. “Hey!” 

“Yes, you do. Face it. You’re avoiding Zoro.” 

You made a face at her. “I think there are ropes on the foredeck that I can attend to.” 

“No, there aren’t,” Nami answered. “Now stop changing the subject. There’s this wild concept called communication. It works wonders.” 

“Says you,” you muttered, though your arms crossed defensively across your chest. You noticed the action after a split-second and unwound your arms with a scowl. “Look, I just don’t see the point. And I haven’t been avoiding him.” 

You were, in fact, avoiding him. Ever since that dreadful night a week ago when Nami had gotten you tipsy and stuck her hand in your chest cavity fishing for secrets, you’d been avoiding him. The other girl was ridiculously good at prying truths out of you, and during the conversation, you’d accidentally spilled your crush on the Straw Hat crew’s resident swordsman. 

You’d managed to keep the secret for the months you’d been together, wherein the unfortunate feelings had developed, and you should’ve figured once somebody knew they wouldn’t leave you alone about it. Because Nami refused to talk about literally anything else. You’d expected this sort of behavior from Luffy, or maybe Sanji, but Nami? The world was more amatonormative than you'd thought. 

Nami cast you a look. “You’re blushing.” 

“Am not.”

“Are too. What’s the harm in talking to him?” Nami demanded, one hand on her hip as she stared you down. You gaped at her. 

“Um, literally everything? One, Zoro can’t talk about feelings or emotions for shit, so when he rejects me it’ll be in the most excruciating, offhand manner that will probably leave me at the bottom of a barrel of rum, two, after being rejected I’m going to have to leave the Straw Hats, three—”

Nami rolled her eyes, looking increasingly fed up with you. “For someone so obsessed with not telling our resident grass-headed swordsman about your feelings for him, you’re talking rather loudly.” 

You shut up, snapping your jaw closed with a glare. “Stop it,” you hissed. 

“Besides, who knows if he actually will reject you?” Nami turned to work on the next section of rigging, glancing over her shoulder at you. “You’re catastrophizing.” 

“I’m being realistic,” you snapped. “Okay, fine. He reciprocates my feelings. Then what? We date, we break up because all relationships eventually end, it becomes awkward, and—voila—I’ll have to leave the Straw Hats anyway. It’s a bad idea all around.” 

Nami just let out a huff of breath, the exhale laced with irritation. “Catastrophizing,” she repeated. 

“I am not—”

“Sure. Go help Sanji with dinner.” 

You gave her an exasperated look, but at this point Nami wasn’t paying attention anymore, so you stormed off into the underbelly of the Going Merry. Speak of the devil, apparently, because once you entered the kitchen you spotted not only Sanji occupying it but also Zoro. He was lounging at the table, swords strapped to his waist and a bottle of something he was nursing in hand. 

You averted your gaze from him, head running a million miles a minute. Had he noticed you’d been avoiding him? You’d tried to be furtive about it, but if Nami had noticed, maybe—

“Well, hello there,” Sanji called from where he was in the midst of dinner preparations. “Come to help?” 

“Nami sent me,” you said, crossing your arms over your chest. “I think she’s appointed herself queen of the Going Merry.” 

“Oh, she did that long ago,” Sanji chided. “You’re only noticing it now. Pick up a knife, then. I’d like some help dicing the carrots.” 

You stiffly moved over to the counter, ignoring Zoro as you went even as you felt his gaze following your figure. You picked up the first knife you found, positioning yourself in front of the cutting board to start dicing the vegetables already laid out for you. Abruptly, Zoro stood up. 

“Heading out,” he muttered. “Call me when dinner’s ready.” 

With that, he left the room, leaving you and Sanji to exchange looks. “He’s moody today,” you said. 

“Probably ‘cause you’ve been avoiding him.” 

You felt the familiar pinprick of a blush starting to warm your cheeks. “You too?” 

“You’re rather obvious about it,” Sanji said with a raised eyebrow. “But enough of that.” Weirdly enough, he didn’t seem to question why. There was no way Nami had told him, so you were left confused, but no matter. The point was that for now, you were safe. 

The hour dipped to evening, and soon the moon was glowing in the sky, a shining beacon of white amidst the ocean of stars and shimmering sea. You suppressed a yawn, busing the dishes from dinner as the rest of the crew got up from their respective seats to dissolve to their own rooms. Zoro had already retired for the night—if you were avoiding him, he seemed to be doing the exact same—so at least you didn’t have that to worry about. 

“Ah, wait,” Nami said, after you’d finished washing the dishes and was ready to head out. “Zoro wants to talk to you.” 

You jolted, glancing nervously around you before grabbing her wrist. “What did you do?” you hissed. Nami just laughed. 

“Calm down. I didn’t do anything.” Off your glare, she relented. “I promise. And I swear it’s not about feelings or emotions or whatever. Even though it’s obvious you’re avoiding him, you know Zoro wouldn’t say anything.” 

You were still suspicious, but you dropped your hand. “What, then?” 

Nami shrugged, tilting her chin up just so. “I guess you’re going to have to find out.” 

“I don’t trust you,” you muttered. There was that look in her eye, the one she got whenever she was thinking of something truly devious. Still, you couldn’t figure out what she was up to, so— “Fine, I’ll go to his room. Walk me.” 

Nami rolled her eyes, but she fell into step with you as you made your way across the ship. “You should bring it up to him, you know,” she started, but silenced after your sharp glare. “Okay, okay. I get the point. I’ll stop bothering you about it.” 

You stopped by the mouth of Zoro’s door. “Wait, really?” 

“Yes, really,” Nami said with an exaggerated roll of her eyes. She leaned against the wall beside the door, arms crossing over her chest. “I’ll leave you alone about Mr. Prince Charming over there. Knock.” 

“You can't call him Mr. Prince Charming,” you said, though you did knock. “Prince’ is already a title.” 

Nami gave you a look. “Okay, smart-ass.” 

The door creaked open before you could give your response, and you turned, heart pounding in your throat as Zoro stared down at you. His arm was propped up by the open doorway, the other hand still clutching the doorknob. “What.” 

“Um, Nami said that you wanted to talk—” you swiveled your head towards the other girl, but before you could finish your sentence, Nami was raising up your arm and unceremoniously shoving you into the room. 

You shrieked in surprise as you fell into Zoro’s figure, stumbling into him and causing him to lose his balance. Your head shot up in offense, only to see the gleam of a golden padlock in Nami’s hand before she was yanking the door closed.

A dull click echoed through the room. The only thing you could hear for a few seconds was your own heavy breathing and the sound of Zoro gathering himself.

“Did she just—” You gaped at the closed door. “Lock us in?” 

Zoro swiftly pushed past you, jiggling the doorknob for a few moments before giving up. Sure enough, Nami had sealed it with the padlock from the outside, so there was no possibility of either of you getting out of the room. You could vaguely hear sounds from the outside—dull thuds and scrapes—and watched as Zoro started banging on the door. 

“Nami,” he called, voice dangerously low. “Let us out.” 

“Sorry, Zoro!” Your jaw practically unhinged from your skull once you heard your captain’s familiar voice, all bright and cheerful like always. “We’re putting barrels in front of the door, so don’t even try breaking it down. Have a good night!” 

“Luffy? What are you—” Zoro’s knocking quickened in pace, his voice getting increasingly louder. There was no response from outside, though you could hear snickers that sounded suspiciously like Usopp. What was going on? 

You kicked into action, joining Zoro by the door and trying the door handle again. “Nami!” you yelled. 

Nami’s soft laugh came from outside. “Sorry!” she called. “We’ll let you out in the morning.”

You gaped at the door, only aware of Zoro’s gaze sliding down to you as you dropped your hand from the doorknob. There were some more tigers from outside, and then receding footsteps. Zoro tried knocking one last time, but it was evident that the rest of the crew had all but abandoned you. 

“Okay,” Zoro muttered, moving away from the door. “I need a drink.” 

You watched him move across the room, picking up a glass from his bedside table that was only slightly full. He knocked it back in one swallow, Adam’s apple bobbing with the motion. “Um, what now?” you asked uncomfortably. 

“Nothing. Whatever,” Zoro said, turning to glance over at you. After a moment’s thought, you noticed that he refused to look you in his eye—his gaze was firmly trained at a spot beside your head. He turned away, stripping off his sword scabbard and setting them on the floor. 

You glanced around nervously. Zoro’s room wasn’t that different from yours, really—less decorated, but the constitution was the same. There was the bed, a wardrobe, a desk with various paraphernalia across it, and a little couch in the corner too. “You can look through the closet for something to sleep in. I’ll take the chair.” 

The words didn’t register at first, and you were left standing there, staring as Zoro kicked off his shoes and assumedly started getting ready to sleep. “Um, what?” 

Zoro glanced over his shoulder. He still wouldn’t look you in the eye. “They’re not letting us out until morning,” he said slowly. “You can take the bed. Might as well sleep.” 

“It’s your room,” you started, crossing your arms. “I can sleep in the chair. I’m smaller than you, anyway, so I’ll fit it better.” 

Zoro regarded you with such a reproachful look you almost wanted to laugh. “That’s ridiculous. Change.” With that, he turned around, leaving no room for discussion. You stared at him for a second before giving up, moving to his wardrobe and opening it up to search for something to sleep in. 

“So, uh, any ideas on why they stuck us in here?” You asked, although you already knew the answer. Whatever Nami thought locking you in a room with Zoro would achieve, you were stubbornly not going to let her be right. God, you were so going to kill her once you got out of there. 

“Nope,” Zoro said, with such a degree of finality you figured it wouldn’t be safe to question him further. “They’re just stupid.” 

“I mean, I feel like they would have a motive?” You rifled through his clothes, trying very hard to detach them from their owner. Wearing Zoro’s clothes was not something you wanted your mind to linger upon. Eventually you found a shirt of his that would undoubtedly be oversized on you, and you hastily changed into it, satisfied to find it draped well to your knees so you weren’t exposing too much skin. 

You stole a glance over your shoulder at Zoro, only to catch him in the action of peeling his shirt off. The stretch of the muscles in his back gleamed in the dim light of the room, and you tore your gaze away, heat rushing to your face. “Um. Anything?” 

“Nope,” Zoro repeated. Carefully, you closed the wardrobe door, lingering in one spot with your hands clenched together. Once you heard him start moving again, you deemed it safe enough to turn towards the rest of the room. He’d changed into a loose tan shirt, and had settled back into the chair. 

“I said I’d take the chair,” you told him hotly. 

“Yeah, and I said no,” Zoro said, tone dismissive. He had his eyes closed, and you stared at him in disbelief. 

“I’m not sleeping in your bed,” you said, and then, just to emphasize your point, plopped down on the floor. Zoro cracked an eye open and stared down at you. He sighed. 

“Get up. Don’t be stupid.” 

“I’m not being stupid,” you said. “It’s your room. It’s your bed. You will sleep on it. If you’re not giving me the chair, I’ll sleep on the floor.” 

Zoro let out a long sigh, closing both his eyes as if he was contemplating all his life decisions. “I’m not sleeping in the bed, you know,” he said. 

“Okay, so neither of us do.” 

Zoro’s brows creased, and he opened his eyes to glare down at you. “Seriously? At least take the chair, then. I’ll sleep on the flo—”

You gave him a sharp look. “Zoro.” 

“This conversation isn’t getting anywhere,” Zoro muttered, and finally got up from his chair. You glanced up at him expectantly. “What can I do to convince you to take the bed?” 

“Uh, nothing.” 

“We can work out a compromise,” Zoro said with a sigh. “I want you on it, and you want me on it, and neither of us are willing to take it ourselves.” He paused, brow creasing as an idea seemed to form in his head—one he didn’t seem to be a giant fan of, but an idea nonetheless. “How about.” His lips pursed, before he parted them again to finish his sentence. “How about we both take it?” 

It felt like someone had hit you square in the chest, air kicking out of your lungs and leaving you gasping for breath. Your windpipe was all raw, and you had to fight to tear any words out from your throat. “Ex—excuse me?” 

“It’s big enough,” Zoro said stiffly, though his hands were clenched at his sides. “I can take one side and you can take the other. Since you’re so dead-set on me sleeping on it.” 

“I—” You cut yourself off, suddenly far too aware of Zoro’s eyes fixed on you. Watching your every move. Oh, Nami was in for it now. How were you supposed to survive sleeping in the same bed as—you didn’t even want to think about it. 

“Well?” Zoro prompted. 

“Fine,” you agreed hastily, ducking your head lest Zoro catch any of the flush that was undoubtedly rising steadily up your cheeks. It was bad enough you were stuck in his bedroom and wearing his clothes—but this had quickly become your own personal circle of hell. “Good enough for me.” 

“Finally.” With that, Zoro climbed into bed, settling himself on the very edge of its side. Your throat had gone dry, and you stared at him for another second before hurriedly turning away to flick the lights off. You approached the other side of the bed with an extreme lack of enthusiasm, staring at the empty sheets like they were cackling up at you. Stupid, stupid, stupid. 

Eventually you slid into the bed, busying yourself with arranging the blankets around your figure. Zoro’s breaths were steady and deep from beside you. You didn’t know what to do for a second, but then Zoro’s voice was cutting through the darkness. “You’ve been avoiding me.” 

You jolted, then suppressed your sigh. “Have not.” 

“Yes, you have, and everyone knows it, and you’re not very subtle,” Zoro said, sounding almost bored as he rattled off the words. “Why.” 

“I haven’t—”

“Don’t.” 

You ran your tongue along your teeth, sucking at the valleys between them in annoyance. “It’s not important.” 

Zoro paused before speaking, like he was mulling over asking the question. “Did I do something?” 

“What? No.” You shook your head, despite knowing he wouldn’t be able to see. The sound did well enough to indicate the action to him, though—he scoffed, a low murmur from his chest that buzzed through your nerves. “I don’t want to talk about this. You’re giving the rest of the crew what they want.” 

“They definitely did not lock you in here to talk about why you’re avoiding me,” Zoro muttered. Now it was your turn to scoff, because if only he knew. “Are you sure I didn’t do anything?" 

“Positive. It’s all me.” 

“Okay, so why?” Zoro prompted. You swallowed hard, trying to dodge around the subject. “Are you sure—”

“Please just stop talking,” you said, one hand reaching out to grip his arm as if the physical contact would make him shut up. There was a stagnant moment of silence, your breath catching as your brain caught up to your body. Your hand was on Zoro’s arm. Your hand was on Zoro’s bicep, and you were in his bed. 

You cleared your throat, a panicked choke bursting from your lungs. “Um.” Your eyes skittered sideways, and then you finally turned on your side to stare at him. To stare at where your hand was still clutched around his arm.

You could just barely make out the angle of his jaw in the darkness, but you could see it was clenched, the vein along his neck protruding just slightly. Hastily, you removed your hand, the skin of your fingers tingling like you could still feel him underneath the tips. “Sorry. Why—why are you so certain that you did something for me to avoid you?” 

There were a few moments of silence that ticked by, nothing but the rock of the ship interrupting it. Finally, Zoro spoke. “Because the reason they locked you in my room is because—”

“What? The reason they locked me in your room is because of me,” you said. Zoro finally moved from his position, head tilting to face yours so you were eye-to-eye. You swallowed. “Nami, um—Nami specifically forced me in here so I would… talk to you.” 

There was a question evident in Zoro’s voice. “About?” 

Your lips parted, and then closed again. “Um.” 

“We can just sleep, if you want,” Zoro muttered. 

“What if they don’t let us out in the morning because we haven’t talked, though?” you hissed. Zoro let out a low laugh. 

“You realize you’re giving them exactly what they want.” 

“So you’d be more comfortable if we just… fell asleep?” you asked. Zoro shrugged. Since you weren’t exactly averse to the idea of not confessing, you nodded in agreement, heart beating a million miles a second. “Okay. Fine by me.” 

You settled back into your pillow, but soon came to realize that, due to the fluttering butterflies in your stomach and the fact you were very aware of the man of your affections being barely a foot to your right, you could not sleep. Evidently Zoro felt the same way, because he kept shifting around under the blankets—your hands brushed against each other a few times before he jolted away like you’d burnt him. 

“Sorry,” you muttered. Zoro didn’t say anything in response. Somewhere in the back of your head, you could hear Nami hissing at you—I didn’t shove you in a room with Mr. Prince Charming just for you to not take advantage of the opportunity. You tried to get her out of your brain—it was a bad idea all around—but the words kept reverberating around in your mind until you found yourself suddenly speaking. “Zoro?” 

“Hm?” 

“Nami stuck me in here so I would tell you that, um—” 

“You don’t have to say it,” Zoro murmured, and you shivered, his voice sounding suddenly closer. You squirmed, your hand brushing against Zoro’s again, except this time it took him a delayed moment to drift away. He had gotten closer—or maybe that was you, instinctually leaning towards the dip in the middle of the bed when you’d been lost in thought. 

“The reason they locked me in here with you is so I would tell you about my feelings towards you,” you blurted, the words slurring together, consonants and syllables all in one rush. “Because I have them. Feelings, I mean.”

Zoro’s voice was very low when he spoke. “Excuse me?” 

You sat straight up, the blankets previously nestled around your chin falling to your waist. “I have feelings for you and that’s why everyone locked me in here.” 

“I—” Zoro coughed, and then coughed again, ridding his throat of whatever was preventing him from making full sentences. He slowly sat up, and you stared down at the blankets in your lap as you saw him rise to his full height beside you. And oh, this was it. He was about to reject you in the most excruciating, offhand manner that would probably leave you at the bottom of a barrel of rum. “That’s not possible.” 

“Why is that—” you decided to shut up instead of finishing your sentence, allowing him to speak instead. There was a soft burning starting at your skin, all red hot, and your brain buzzed, regret filling up your lungs and making it hard to breathe. 

Zoro didn’t say anything, but you heard his hand before you felt it. It slid across the bedsheets before finally resting beside yours, fingertips grazing against your knuckles. “Zoro?” you whispered. 

“The reason they locked you in here with me is so I would tell you about my feelings towards you,” Zoro said blankly. You blinked. It took you a moment to realize that he wasn’t just quoting you—that he hadn’t switched the pronouns accordingly. Your heart dropped. 

Your voice was very faint when you spoke. “What?” 

“I like you,” Zoro said carefully. Languidly, the words dripping off his tongue all saccharine-sweet like molasses, or honey. You shivered, your hand accidentally knocking against his, and he took the opportunity to draw it in closer, fingers pushing up your palm, just a hair’s breadth away from interlacing with yours. “Luffy unfortunately found out. He doesn’t know how to keep a secret and told the rest of the crew.” 

You gaped at him. “I like you,” you said, dumbfounded. You could feel yourself trembling, fingers sliding against Zoro’s hand with every shake. “Nami yanked it out of me. Which is why I’ve been avoiding you for the past week.” 

“I thought you were avoiding me because you found out I liked you,” Zoro muttered. His fingertips brushed against the pads of your hand, and you swallowed, mouth all dry. “So.” 

You tentatively lifted your gaze, finding Zoro’s eyes even amidst the darkness. They were shining, a slight glint from the moon coming in through the window reflecting along the shadows of his face. Carefully, his hand slid fully into yours, fingers lacing together, and it was like the final piece of a puzzle clicking into place. 

Zoro slid back down onto his back, tugging you along with him. You settled back on your pillow, using your other hand to pull the blankets back over your chest. For a full stagnant minute the two of you lay there, hands intertwined in the space between. 

You were the one who made the first move, then, thumb running up and down the length of his index finger. Zoro ran with the action, tugging your hand just slightly until you were leaning into the dip of the mattress, gravity pulling you closer to his body. 

He lifted your entwined hands, tugging you towards him until your back was pressed right to his chest. Then he settled your arms back down again, the back of his palm resting against your belly. 

You swallowed hard, able to hear the sound of your throat in the utter silence. Zoro exhaled, his breath softly brushing against your neck. “Good night,” you whispered. 

Zoro pressed a soft kiss to the nape of your neck, a ghost of something that left tingles fluttering down your spine, the drunken butterflies in your stomach swaying at the action. “Good night,” he murmured, and your breath caught. 

He was warm, oh so warm, like a campfire with licks of flame that softened your hands in the dead of night. And even though you wanted to speak up, question when he’d started liking you, if he was lying or not—you were content to stay here in his arms and drift off to sleep.

So you did, settling back into his embrace with your head spinning and senses murmuring, all dizzy like you were caught in a dream. Eventually, your tiredness got the better of you, and you felt your senses fading as the world around you darkened to black. 

The two of you jolted awake to the knocking and the very unpleasant hum of Nami’s voice. “Rise and shine!” she called through the door, and you blinked, bleary eyes adjusting to the light as you suppressed your yawn. 

Zoro jolted up beside you, practically giving you whiplash as his arm was still comfortably around your waist. Your fingers tingled, and you realized that you’d fallen asleep with your hands laced together. 

“Nami,” you grumbled, about to rise out of bed before Zoro stopped you. You turned towards him in question, only to stop short as you registered the look in his eyes. His gaze was deep, piercing; those butterflies rose up again in your stomach, apparently awake after they’d passed out from their drunken stupor. You swallowed. “Hi?” 

“Hey,” he murmured. “They locked you in my room.” 

“I’m going to knock Nami over the head with a rowboat oar,” you said blandly, eyes flickering towards the door, which Nami was still pounding on. You vaguely heard shuffling sounds, like the crew were working to move the barrels they’d stuck in front of the door to free you from your prison. “You can have the rest of them, if you want.” 

“I’ll take you up on that offer,” Zoro agreed. “But first…” 

“First?” you prompted. 

Zoro brought your hands—still intertwined—to his mouth, pressing a gentle kiss along your knuckles. “Good morning,” he said, voice low and awkward, like he wasn’t used to letting the words out of his mouth. He let your hands drift to his lap, leaning forward until his forehead brushed against yours.

A faint sigh escaped your lips when he finally kissed you. It wasn’t rough or hard; it was a soft press, like your hands had been just a few hours ago. There was a degree of finality to it; a held-in breath that’d exhaled from your lungs, one you hadn’t realized was building up that much pressure until you finally let it all go. 

The door flung open, and you jolted away, but Zoro tilted your head back towards him before you could. At the mouth of the room, Luffy had started screaming. “Aww,” Nami cooed. Behind her, Usopp and Sanji were gripping onto each other like they were watching a particularly engaging fight. 

A steady blush rose along your cheeks, but Zoro was absolutely shameless, the hand not held in yours raising up to give them the finger. “Get out of my room.”

“Told you it’d be okay,” Nami sing-songed, and then you really did break away from Zoro, picking up the object nearest to you and barrelling towards her. She shrieked, dodging out of the doorway as Zoro laughed from behind you.

“Wait!” she stopped you from whacking your pillow against her head, raising up her arms in defense. “I was right. I saw you two—” 

“Nami,” you started, dangerously low. “You locked me in his room.”

“Yeah, to help you!” she cried defensively, slowly taking backwards steps as you gained on her. “Come on. We can talk about this.” 

“Good luck,” Zoro called out from behind you—you turned around, catching his gaze. He had gotten up, leaning against the doorway and watching you with a sparkle of fondness in his eye. “You’ll need it.” 

You blew him a kiss, ignoring the long groan it pulled out of Luffy from beside Zoro in the hallway. And then you turned around. Nami had darted off, taking the time you’d been distracted to run off. “Oh no you don’t!” you yelled, and then lunged after her with Zoro laughing all the while. 

Maybe it hadn’t been such a bad thing, you thought. But you were still going to beat Nami’s ass. 

© halfvalid 2023

[covenofagatha]

I adore your writing so much omg.

Agatha/Reader with a size kink and maybe include riding somewhere in there :))

I'm so tired lmao

writing size kink is lowkey really hard but hopefully i somewhat got it right

decided to combine this one with the priest!agatha fic cause i thought it was hot

literally going straight to hell for this 🫠🫣

Forgive me, Father (part 2)

You go back to confession after you can't stop thinking about Father Agatha

Word count: 2600

Warnings: religion kink, religious sex, strap-on, fingering, corrupt priest Agatha, naive and innocent and virgin reader, dubcon, slight size kink, probably some other filth

“Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned. It has been three days since my last confession,” you say, just those words causing the memory of what happened last time to heat through you. 

The priest was already inside the booth when you came in and didn’t say a word even after your door was shut so you were forced to start. 

You still didn’t know who was in there next to you, but a part deep inside you is hoping for Father Agatha. 

The priest shifts in the booth and you bite your lip. “What do you have to confess, child?” 

It’s a man’s voice. 

Your face falls and now you have to come up with something to confess for because you don’t think he’ll be as understanding as she was. 

“I, um, the other day…” you start, completely fishing for something, when there’s a light through the partition. The door to the other half has been opened and you hear faint mutterings. 

The door closes and the priest clears his throat. “Excuse me, my child, but I must attend to an urgent matter.” 

“Oh,” you say, a little shocked. You’ve never known that they could just walk out of a confession like that. 

“Don’t fret. Father Agatha will be in shortly to hear the rest of it. She is a new wonderful addition to our parish and you’re in good hands,” he praises and you blush furiously. 

Good hands indeed. 

You cough. “We’ve met.” You can still feel her leg against your private parts – your pussy – and her fingers digging into your hips. The way pleasure rolled over your body because of her. The way her dark eyes tempted you to take a bite of the sweet, forbidden fruit of desire. 

The priest says something else that you don’t hear before getting out. You’re alone with your thoughts until the door opens again in a few minutes. 

Just from knowing that it’s her makes your heart get faster and your body starts to feel affected in the way only she makes it. 

“Hi, angel,” she says in her delightfully low voice. 

“Father Agatha,” you breathe. Her chuckle is sinful.

You can hear her moving around and her robes shuffle. You remember her pulling them up to her hips to show herself to you. “What do you have to confess, child?” 

“I can’t stop thinking about the other day,” you admit. “I even gave in and tried to touch myself like how you showed me, but I couldn’t get to that thing at the end. Like last time.”

You think you can hear her smirking. “You couldn’t orgasm? Poor thing, you must be so hot and bothered.” 

You squirm, not even trying to hide it. You’ve been so needy the past few days and you don’t know what to do. “I need help to get rid of these thoughts. I’ve tried praying and I did all the Hail Mary’s you said to but I feel like I’m still being corrupted. You said that you could help.” Your voice comes out whinier than intended but you don’t care. 

“I can help, my child. Why don’t you come back over here?”

This time, you need no extra convincing. You slide into her booth, sinking down to your knees already. You hear a sharp intake of air from her and she reaches out to brush your hair out of her face. 

“What do you want?” She asks and your eyes are pleading as they look up at her from the floor. 

“I want you to cleanse me of these thoughts,” you beg. This is a sin, you know that, and you don’t want to go to Hell. You’ll do anything to stop this heat inside you. 

Father Agatha tilts her head to the side to think about what she can do. “I don’t know if I can cleanse them entirely,” she says finally and you want to cry. “But I can quench them for now.” 

“How?” You ask, barely above a whisper. 

You hold your breath when she begins to pull up her robes again and reaches down to pull something out from the fabric between her legs. Your mouth falls open. You’re not sure what it is, but it’s long, thick, and purple. She grabs ahold of the base close to her skin and shakes it a little. 

“What is that?” It both terrifies you and makes the throbbing inside you a little worse. 

“Have you ever seen a penis?” She asks bluntly and your ears burn. 

“Of course not! I’m not married! But that’s not–” You know that she doesn’t have one, you saw her pussy last time. And you at least know that they’re not purple. 

She chuckles and spits down onto the thing, using her hand to spread the saliva over it. Your body betrays you and your breathing quickens. What is happening to you?

“No, this isn’t a penis,” she agrees. “It’s a special toy that has been blessed by God. If you orgasm around this, it will stop those thoughts.” 

You bite your lip, staring at the toy. “How is it supposed to fit inside me? It’s so big.” Her grin grows wider if possible. 

“We’ll make it fit,” she promises but it does little to quell the fear. 

“Will it hurt?” You ask timidly. 

Father Agatha tilts her from side to side. “Maybe a little. You’ll just have to get yourself ready.” Before you can ask how, she answers. “It will help if you stretch yourself out on your fingers first.”

Your mouth drops open. Last time was the first time you’d ever touched down there and you had just rubbed your clit over your underwear. The past three days, you had only also done that and tried to move against your pillow, no skin-on-skin contact. And now she wants you to put a finger inside?

“Is that even allowed?” You ask hushedly. “Isn’t that a sin?” 

She finally stops stroking the toy and reaches the hand out to cup your cheek. You can feel the stickiness on her palm and the sudden urge to lick it flits through your mind. 

You seriously need help. 

“Why don’t you let me do it, then? My hands are tools of the Lord. Nothing more holier. Let me help you.” 

You nod slowly and she smirks, patting her thighs. You get up from your knees, wincing at the soreness, and sit on her lap again, the ache inside you only growing worse from being this close. 

The toy is laying against your stomach and it’s a soft, spongy texture. It feels weird but you can’t help but imagine what it’ll be like inside you. 

Father Agatha’s hand slides under the skirt you’re wearing to touch you over your underwear and your hips jump. It’s a very different feeling than your own. 

She groans as she moves her fingers up and down, pressing the fabric against you, and you can feel how soaked it is. 

“Father,” you gasp out when she rubs at your clit. The sensation is so very new and feels so very good. You want her to keep doing it. 

“You’re such a special girl,” Father Agatha coos. “So pure, so innocent. Such a devout follower.”

You wonder if this is how the Virgin Mary felt when the angel came down to tell her that God had hand picked her. 

Or how Jesus felt when he was tempted by the Devil in the desert during those forty days. 

She slides your underwear to the side and you think you’ve died and gone to heaven when her bare hand cups you. 

Your head falls back and you let out a long moan. She traces up and down, collecting your wetness, and swirling it against your clit. You clutch onto her shoulders like she's a lifeline. 

You can’t believe you’ve never done this before. 

“Feels good, angel?” She asks, her voice husky. You nod desperately, but tense when she probes a fingertip at your hole. “Just relax.” 

You try to and you take a deep breath, but when she begins to push in, you clench so tightly you’re worried it’s going to hurt her finger. 

“It’s okay,” she coaxes, thumb rubbing your clit again. That helps you loosen up, but she doesn’t move, letting you adjust. “Your tiny little pussy has never had anything in it. But we’ll get there.” 

You bite your lip and give her the go ahead. She moves an inch and you gasp. You can’t seem to let go and unwind and she frowns. 

“I’m sorry,” you say, face turning red with humiliation. 

She tuts sotfly. “It’s okay, angel. I know what it must feel like. Why don’t you say one of your prayers? It will help take your mind off this.”

You nod, meeting her eyes that look like darkness has swallowed them whole. “Our Father, who art in heaven-” 

She pushes the rest of her finger inside you and you momentarily lose the ability to speak. 

The intrusion is not unwelcome and she experimentally curls her finger, tapping onto something inside of you that makes you whimper. She smirks wickedly and does it again. 

Your hips roll. 

“Father,” you moan, and when she keeps doing it and rubs at your clit, your entire body spasms. 

“Keep going, angel,” she urges. 

It takes a lot of effort to regain your thoughts. “Hallowed be thy name. Thy kingdom come, thy will be done-” She waits for you to get a few lines out before moving all the way back out and pushing back in. 

You squeal and grab onto her tighter. She gives you a look and you know what it means. She waits until you start talking again to begin moving faster. 

“On earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread and forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us.” 

Father Agatha pulls out of you and you groan at the emptiness but you’re quickly even more full when she pushes two fingers in. 

Your head drops forward onto her shoulder and you mewl loudly. 

“Too much, Father,” you cry. She rubs your clit frantically and doesn’t move until you slowly begin to loosen around her. Once you adjust, it feels even better and when she curls them to touch that special spot and –

– God. 

You don’t even feel bad about using the Lord’s name in vain. 

“So perfect, your tiny pussy feels so good around my fingers,” Father Agatha pants. “Never felt anything so tight. Can’t wait to fill you up with my big cock, watch you stretch around it.” 

Her filthy words make you flush but the heat inside you gets worse. Why do you find that so hot?

“Lead us not into temptation,” you start again, the irony not lost on you. It seems the priest also gets it because she twists her fingers with an evil smirk and it makes you whimper. You can feel yourself on that ledge you were on last time, the one that is an all-consuming wave of pleasure, and you’re just about to tip over. “And deliver us from evil.” 

“Amen,” Father Agatha finishes the prayer for you, swiping roughly at your clit and thrusting deeply. 

You orgasm all over her fingers and it feels even more intense than the last time. She gently keeps moving her fingers while you come down from your high and you rest your forehead against hers. Instead of feeling satisfied when she pulls them out, you only feel more empty and needy.

“Do you think you’re ready to take my special toy, angel?” She asks, moving her hand that’s wet with you up and down. You gulp and look at it. “It will feel so good, I promise.” 

“Okay,” you whisper and her smirk makes you feel things. She helps you hold yourself up while she positions the tip at your entrance after rubbing it through your folds a few times. You slide down the tiniest bit and you keen. 

If you thought her fingers were a tight fit, this is something entirely new. Father Agatha whispers sweet nothings, circling your clit again to make you less tense, and she slowly helps guide you down. 

“Oh, my God,” you moan. She is so big inside you and it’s stretching you out more than you thought possible. 

“Just Father Agatha is fine,” she remarks coyly, eyes never moving away from watching you take her in. “Angel, you’re so perfect, you’re taking my big cock so well in your tiny pussy. You look so delicious wrapped around me like that.” 

Hearing her talk about the toy like it’s actually part of her makes you grow even hotter and you finally make it to the bottom, the entire thing inside you. 

You feel so full; you think you can feel her in your ribcage. 

“Can I move?” She asks and you nod shakily. Her hands help you bounce up and down, just little movements at first, but gradually turning into sliding you to the top and then back to bottoming out. 

The burn inside you gives way to a wonderful feeling and you can feel her dragging the toy, her cock, against every ridge and groove inside you. 

Father Agatha groans when you start to take the initiative and ride without so much of her help. You’re chasing the pleasure that’s building up inside you and it’s so much better than anything you’d had before. 

“Look at you, angel, taking my big cock so well in your tiny pussy. If you weren’t such a good girl, I would’ve assumed you’ve done this before. But you’re so perfect and pure and innocent and God’s gift to the world,” she says, voice rough. “Do you like my cock?” 

You nod harder than you ever have in your life. “Feels so good, Father. This can’t be a sin.” 

Father Agatha shakes her head. “It’s not, angel. Anytime you feel that heat inside you and you think those dirty thoughts, come to me and I’ll help you. It’s not a sin if you’re with a priest.” 

She begins slamming her hips up into you as you drive down to meet her thrusts. She rubs your clit even harder now and you completely convulse all over the toy, the pleasure crashing through you so much more greatly than even before, clenched around her fingers. 

You feel like King Solomon, chasing after true gratification, but unlike him whose search is futile, you’ve found it in the arms of a priest. 

You slump against her, who softly strokes your back while you regain your strength. 

“How do you feel now?” She asks. “Are those dirty thoughts you were having gone?” 

You shift and wince at the toy still inside you. She lifts you up so it can slip out. You feel thoroughly ruined and you just want to take a nap. No more heat in you at all. “Yes, they are, Father. Thank you.” 

She pats your thighs and you stand up, blood rushing back to your stiff legs. 

“Glad I could help, child. It’s my duty as a priest to help you strengthen your relationship with God, and if this is what it takes with you, I’m more than willing to do it whenever you need.”

You run a hand through your hair and think about it. “We might need to do this a few more times,” you admit. You still don’t know how to take care of the problem yourself, and like she said, it’s okay if it’s with a priest. 

She smirks like the Devil incarnate. “I look forward to it.” 

[bunny-jpeg]

hello bunny! I love the concept of your bakery it’s literally so cool

do you think I could get chocolate cake & honey cruller with a side of espresso shot?!? with carlos sainz? tyy!

bakery menu

want to suggest your own order? then hit up the bakery! we're always open! and thank you to this anon for a great suggestion! a little bit of size kink and some dirty talk, now that's what i'm talking about! i hope you enjoy the fic!

chocolate cake ("do you feel that? that's what happens when i think about you all day.") + honey cruller ("i forget how small you are sometimes.") + espresso shot (dirty talking) served by carlos sainz jr (formula one)!

cw: smut/pwp, dirty talking, (slight) size kink, thigh fucking, sick fic

there was something about how vulnerable you looked when you ha d a cold. you poor thing, sick within the first week of summer break! how unfair! but, carlos wasn't going to shy away from his lover at her weakest.

so he followed you like a shadow most of the day in the house you shared. if you wanted to move from the bedroom to the living room, he'd grab your blankets and bring them to the couch. if you wanted to go to the kitchen to get some ginger tea, he was right behind you, making sure that you didn't have any problems.

he let you rest against him, or prop your feet up on his lap. and while he was being the perfect boyfriend, something deep was clawing inside of him. the sight of you so reliant on him, made his cock stir.

carlos wanted to fuck that sweet pussy of yours. it had been on his mind since he came home and found you bundled up on the couch. you had swapped from wearing his t-shirts to just a sports bra because the heat of the sickness was making you uncomfortable.

so very clearly he could see the lines of your body. the softness in your stomach and your cute breasts were on full display. he wanted to sink his teeth into you. it was painful for him.

it all came to a head when you were curled up in bed with him. he was on his phone. you shifted a little and made a small moaning noise. it struck a cord with him as you peeked out of the blankets.

"are you okay, mi amor?" he asked. as he looked down at you, trying to ignore the erection in his sweatpants.

you nodded, "yeah, you're looking a little flushed, honey." you reached out from your blanket nest and went to touch his face gently, "are you getting sick too?"

"no, no." he said, "i'm not sick. i just want to fuck you, mi amor." he admitted, "i know you're sick, but i want to feel you." he brushed hair out of your face. he knew that he couldn't keep secrets from you, it was impossible. he remembered the time that he had to keep your surprise party a secret and he felt like he was going to die.

you blinked up at him from your nest of blankets, you said, "i don't know if i can take it inside me right now."

he pulled the blankets away from the lower half of your face and said, "you don't have to do anything, beautiful. just lie there and i'll use your thighs. but, i need your permission." he rubbed your cheek, it felt warmed under his touch.

carlos was a sucker for consent, he was the type to think that the more consent the better. so even if he wanted it badly, he would stop himself if you said no.

you pulled the blankets from your body, exposing your almost bare chest and barely covered bottoms. your hair was a mess and you looked obviously sick. carlos wanted to bite his fist to keep himself together.

you looked at him before you coughed a little, "you can carlos." you said with a smile, "you didn't have to ask."

he took you by the face and kissed you on the nose, "no, no. i gotta ask, i need to know how sick you are. i never want to force myself onto you."

you smiled a little, "then feel free to use my thighs, carlos. i trust you. okay? i love you."

"i love you too." he said softly as he put you onto your stomach with your hips up. as much as he'd love to sink his cock into your pussy at the angle you were in, he had to be careful of you for now.

he got his cock out of his sweatpants, and then got your naked. in all fairness the lack of clothes felt nice on your hot body. he used his spit to lube up his cock before he spread your thighs a little with his to slip his cock between your soft flesh.

he felt a shudder run through him, "do you feel that? that's what happens when i think about you all day." you had been on his mind since he woke up, after he got you some medicine for your cold, he had thought about you neediness. it made him so painfully turned on.

you whined into the pillows as your back arched a little bit. you wanted him, but knew that it would all take too much out of you. you were supposed to be overcoming the cold, as badly as you wanted to be fucked by your loving boyfriend.

carlos loved he feeling of your soft thighs around his cock. not the most ideal position, but he'd take what he could get. he wanted to feel close to his precious girlfriend. he could feel the tingle of heat in his body as he moved against you.

you laid under him so pretty, your cute little moans between sneezes and coughs. it was so painfully cute. it was cute in a way that made carlos swear he saw stars as his achy cock leaked pre cum all over your soft thighs.

"i forget how small you are sometimes." he admitted, "you're so tiny compared to me. no wonder you need my help when you're sick. it just ravages you. need your big strong boyfriend to protect you, my love." he groaned as he continued to move.

you held onto the covers and let out a hearty cough before carlos leaned over you and kissed you on your flushed cheek. you croaked, "thank you, honey."

"of course, of course. you take such good care of me. i might as well take good care of you too. do everything in my power to make sure that you are safe."

you felt his love and moaned under his touch. you promised yourself when you were feeling less achy and sick, you'd get your own orgasm too. you knew that carlos would make sure that he got a few dozen out of you.

your thighs were so cute, so sweet around his cock. it was different than having regular sex with you. but it curbed an ache in his gut.

"shit, mi amor. that's it. your thighs feel so good." he panted as he moved against you. his hands still on your hips as he rubbed against your thighs. he knew he was getting close and picked up the pace to reach his climax.

his pre-cum was already making a huge mess on your body as he dragged his cock up against you. he panted how much he loved you until he felt the climax fully over take him. with a few heavy thrusts, he finished between your thighs.

"ah. carlos." you whimpered.

"i know, i know." he groaned as he got himself over that hill. cum spurted out all over your skin. he slowed down, his cum was stuck to your stomach and pussy. he pulled out and you got onto your stomach so it didn't even up all over the covers. even though a lot of it was dripped onto the sheets.

he got up and grabbed a towel to wipe you down. he admired your naked body and the steady rise and fall of your chest. his hands then grazed your soft skin and he went in to kiss you on the lips.

"how was that?" you asked.

he nodded, "perfect. god, you're so perfect. mi ángel. my little sick angel." he kissed you once more. he got his cock back into his sweatpants before he pressed his weight on top of you. his strong arms around you.

eventually it turned into spooning and his legs tangled up in yours. as he held you, he winced when you coughed violently. he kissed you on the neck and whispered a promise, "i'll take care of you, my love. anything you need, is yours."

you replied, feeling sleepy again, "i believe you, you've already done so much for me." you yawned and turned over in his arms to press your face into his chest.

he chuckled, "i only try to match what you do for me. now get some rest. i'll be here when you wake up." he kissed you once more, as a promise. you take care of him and he takes care of you, no matter what. <3

[xetlynn]

Twilight Imagines- Jasper x Fem! Reader

I Am A Fool

[other imagines]

Requested by: @raviolisblog

Summary: Reader is a nurse in the military which is how she meets Jasper, they fall in love and plan a future together but unfortunately Jasper gets moved to another base and they are separated. Which is where he turns and disappears, his writing to Reader stops and she doesn’t understand why. Only to go into her own demise, turning into a vampire. She searches for her love for over a century.

"[Name]!?" A voice calls after me as I clean my medicine station. I turn around to see my only friend, Esther. Both of us started training to become military nurses at the same time. We stuck around each only each other in the beginning and then that's eventually how it stayed. "Yes?" I respond with a tiny smile upon my face.

"Did you hear the soldiers and us will be eating lunch together this week?" She asks, her eyes sparkling with joy. I only chuckle at her question, getting back to what I was doing before she came into the tent. "I did hear. It doesn't matter though, I'm stuck with cleaning duty this week." I sigh out, annoyed. I didn't really care either, getting to know the soldiers who treat us nurses like dirt. As if we aren't the ones who take care of them whenever they get injuries that range from the tiniest splinter to gunshot wounds.

"Oh, [Name], you have to join me. I'll help you get your work done." She grabs my hand, forcing me to look at her once again. I raise a brow at her. "Please, I would like to get to know them. Maybe... we won't be as lonely." She whispers, glancing around but there was no one else but us there.

I knew she had another motive though. She wanted to fall in love. It was something she always talked about. Wishful thinking. All because of these romance novels she read before becoming a nurse.

"I don't mind being lonely, Esther. Besides I don't think I could handle the stupidity that reeks off of those men." I take my hand back from her grasp. Finishing up my cleaning.

"[Name], I will only beg this of you for the rest of the week." She tells me in a sharp tone. "That's only 7 days. I shall live." I grin cheekily, sitting down as I write down things I need from the utility room.

"[Name], join me one day at least. Please." She pleads with me, dropping down in front of where I sit. I place my clipboard and pencil down. Staring at her for a moment before throwing my head back. "One day, Esther. That's all I give you. No more begging after that." I point a finger in her face. Her expression beams with happiness, she stands up from the ground, grabbing my hands once again. "Thank you, thank you. You will not regret it!" She squeals, kissing my hands as if I had saved her family member from death or something. I shake my head, with a tiny smile that I couldn't hide even if I tried. "I better not." I mutter in a joking voice.

And the day after that conversation is the day she chose for me to join her to lunch. Lunch with the army men that chatted with every woman that they could. Multiple coming up to us. I sat silent during most conversations. Esther enjoying every moment. I quietly ate my food. Observing how the nurses almost dumb themselves down for all the men that come their way. It was embarrassing. I felt embarrassment for them. Even though I know they couldn't care less how they're perceived unless it is by the said men.

I stand up abruptly to throw away my empty tray. My best friend doesn't even notice I had left. I shake my head with a small laugh. She would've been fine without me, if only she had known.

After throwing away my tray I stand there for a moment, deciding on if I should go back to my seat or go start on some cleaning. My thinking was interrupted by a tap on the shoulder. I stand up straighter, mentally preparing myself for a horrible, short conversation. I turn to see a longer haired blond.

He looks familiar as well. I glance down to his empty tray. "Sorry, am I in your way?" I ask, stepping to the side. "Only a little bit." He gives me a curtly smile, his dimples forming immediately. "My apologies." I bow my head, I go to walk away but he clears his throat. "May I ask what your name is?" He speaks up once again. "I guess you may." I joke before answering him. "[Name] [Last Name]." I tell him.

"That's a beautiful name." He compliments me and I feel my face begin to heat up. I stammer for a moment, attempting to calm myself down before speaking. "Uh, thank you. I uh I better get going." I start to walk backwards bumping into a table. Apologizing to it like an idiot before hurrying away to start on cleaning tasks.

"I looked like a fool Esther!" I cry out, hiding my face in my hands. "I'm sure you didn't." She disagrees with me, I could tell she wasn't paying attention though. Her eyes looking off into the distance as we were supposed to be doing tasks for the day. Cleaning the sheets from the men's beds. "Oh but I did. I bumped into a table and said sorry to it as if it were a human." I ranted to her anyways. "Oh wow." She mumbles.

"I feel as though you do care for what I am saying." I stop my cleaning, staring at her. "Mhm." She hums, she was looking around, outside of the tent. I roll my eyes. "Who are you looking for, Esther Anne?" I question her loud enough to snap her out of it. Her eyes widen as she looks at me. "I'm not looking for anyone." She shakes her head. Lying to me. "Right. What did I just say moments ago?"

She stays silent in response and I begin to laugh. "Ugh, I'm sorry [Name]. I just, I've been talking to one of the soldiers. His name is Ryan. He's perfect. He walked me to the tent after lunch yesterday and then found me later in the day." She excitedly informs me, going back to looking out of the tent where the men walk by. "He told me he'd look for me today." She smiles brightly. "I'm sure he will." I assure her, going back to washing the sheets.

"Oh I hope so." She quietly says under her breath. "So the man you talked to yesterday, was he cute? He had to have been if you called yourself a fool over him." She changes the subject and I glare at her. "I did not call myself a fool over him. It was over me bumping into a table." I argue with her, upset that she would even say that. Acting stupid over a man. I make fun of women like that all the time. I wouldn't go doing it myself. "You didn't answer my question." She sings.

"What question?" I furrow my eyebrows. "Was he cute?" She asks with a smirk. "He was..." I think back to his looks. His hazel eyes, his dimples that appeared when he smiled or even talked a little bit. His blond hair that fit him perfectly. I shake the thoughts out of my head. "He was all right." I shrug my shoulders. She stares at me for a moment with a disbelieving expression. "Yeah, okay."

I don't have the energy to argue with her this time though. Moving on from the conversation as we put all the sheets into baskets, heading out of the tent to hang them up to dry.

Esther begins to talk about Ryan again, describing his features and physical beauty. I stayed quiet only responding when there was a pause of silence.

As we hung up the sheets I felt a couple of presences pop up behind us. I turn around to see the man from yesterday along with two others.

"What can we do you for?" I ask, wondering why they came up to us. Esther notices them and her eyes widen. "Oh Ryan, you found me." She grins, hooking up one last sheet before going up to him. "I told you I would." He smiles gently. He was on the shorter side but he genuinely matched her so well.

"This is Jasper, a friend of mine. And this is John." He introduces his friends. I stare at the ground as they talk. Esther shaking the other men's hands. "Nice to meet you two." She sweetly says. "You as well, I have to get going though. Just wanted to see the pretty girl he won't shut up about." John messes with Ryan before walking away. Ryan rubs the back of his neck embarrassed but Esther only grins ear to ear hearing that.

Suddenly she snaps out of her trance and pulls me forward. "This is [Name], she's my best friend I told you about." She tells the two men not knowing that Jasper is the man I told her about. "Pleasure to meet you." Ryan nods his head to me and I do the same. I look at Jasper who already has a smile on his face. "Nice to meet you, again." He says to me and I give a short smile. Esther has a shocked face but then smirks.

"I was going to show Ryan something on one of the trails, you two should get to know one another." Esther grabs the shorter man by the arm, beginning to walk away. "What? But- Our other chores!" I call after her. "We have time to finish them later." She smiles, turning away and ignoring my other protests.

I give up and turn to the man in front of me. "Hah, so... Jasper is your name." I awkwardly say. He chuckles, nodding his head. "Jasper Whitlock." He sticks his hand out. "Whitlock." I repeat quietly. It's familiar. I take his hand but I don't let go as I try to remember who he is.

"I've taken care of you before." I tell him suddenly. My grip lessening on his hand but I still don't let go. Not even realizing I'm doing it. "That is true. I got sick with a common cold." He says. I stare at him, scrunching my nose. I glance down to see our hands still holding and I let go quickly. "Right, glad to see you're feeling better." I grab the baskets from the ground, stacking them so it's easier to carry.

"Thank you, let me help you." He begins to take the baskets from my hands and surprisingly I let him. We go to the tent to put the baskets away. "Thank you." I say softly, he smiles. His dimples forming even more. I feel my body stiffen and I don't know what to talk about with him.

"Would you want to join me on a stroll in town?" He asks me suddenly and I go to talk but he speaks up once again. "Not today, maybe during the weekend. When you've finished your tasks." He finishes, he seemed nervous and I still stay silent. Not knowing how to respond without stuttering or making myself look like an idiot in front of this beautiful man. "You don't have to, it would be as friends." He assures me, the word friends disappoints me though. I smile. "I would love to join you." I begin to walk out of the tent. "Even if it was more than friends." I tell him.

"I have to go to my higher up, maybe I will see you in the evening?" I ask him, turning to look at him as he still stood in the tent. "Maybe I will look forward to it." He responds and I break out into a smile before walking away.

Days pass, Esther has been busy with Ryan along with her duties so we haven't seen each other much. Only before we go to bed and attempt to catch each other up on everything that has been happening. Jasper comes to find me every day. Even for a short minute it's only to talk to me. Making sure I'm still up for our stroll on Saturday evening, today. He will be seeing me outside of my uniform. Unfortunately he will still be in his. I don't mind it though, I rather enjoy him in it.

I finish up with my tasks for the day, changing into a frilly black skirt and a light pink long sleeved shirt. Tucking it into the skirt. I go to the mirror, checking out the outfit before putting my boots on. It's rare I ever wear these types of clothes. Only being in my uniform lately. It was a nice change. My hair was curled as normal, styled in a certain way that was a little different than what I do for work.

I was happy with how I looked. I head out of the bedrooms and go to the dining hall where he told me to meet him. To my surprise he was already standing there. He didn't notice me walking up to him so I try to stay quiet before loudly saying "boo!" His body jolts up and he looks up at me. "Oh my goodness." He clutches his chest. I laugh, apologizing. "That was too good!" I clap my hands together.

"That was good, but just know there will be payback." He tells me and I smile. "Oh really?" We begin to walk. "Mhm, you'll never expect it." He looks ahead, leading me to the horse stables.

We take his horse into town, I hold onto him the whole time. Maybe more than I have to but I don't hear him complaining.

Once he gets to a spot to tie the horse to I let go of him so he can get down. I watch as he ties the reins to a pole. He pets the animal before his attention goes to me. He lifts his hand and I take it. I swing my leg over and make sure my skirt won't slide up.

I then panic on how I'm going to get down. "I have never really been on a horse before." I tell him suddenly. He furrows his brows. "You got on with ease though?" He reminds me and I smile awkwardly. "I just watched how you get up and I hoped for the best." I tell him and he begins to laugh.

"Just jump down." He tells me and I look at the ground and it feels higher up than it actually is. "I'm a little fearful, Whitlock." I admit to him. "I got you darlin, I promise." He says, but it's still not enough. "What if my skirt rides up?" I pat down the fabric that I am wearing.

"I won't let that happen." He assures me and I sigh out. I was still holding his hand. "here." He lets go of my hand and then both of his hands grab my waist. "Jump off, I got you." He nods for me to do it and I grimace. I close my eyes and then do as told. I let out a little noise but he puts me down gently and I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding.

"See, nothing to worry about when I'm around." He nudges me and I smile. "Sorry about that." I frown, holding my hands together. "You're quite alright, darlin. It was a cute moment I will cherish." He takes my arm and we begin to walk. "Darlin a new name for me?" I tease him, moving closer to him as I hold his arm. I look up at him to see him smiling. "If you'd like it to be." He looks down at me in the corner of his eye instead of actually turning his head.

"I don't mind it." I answer, looking forward.

The rest of the day we talked, he bought me little treats throughout the stroll. Telling me it's to support local businesses.

It was a wonderful date that I want to do for the rest of my life. Especially with Jasper. It has only been a week and I think I've fallen for him. In a way that's almost painful when we're apart. I take in every minute we have together.

Weeks pass and it seems we only fall for one another harder than the day before. Our lips haven't even locked but the passion between us is something I've never felt before. We talk of the future. The ending of the war and building a life together.

At least that's what we did until he got told he was leaving to another base. He ran immediately to me to tell me. "Maybe I can leave too, you guys will need nurses." I say in a hopeful tone but he frowns. "I was told they already had their nurses at that base." He was gripping my hand as if I would go away. "I can still ask. We have to be positive." My chest began to move up and down. Panicking. You never know what is to happen in the war.

If this will be our last moments together. I couldn't bear the thought of never seeing Jasper ever again. "Hey, my darlin. It's okay. It's okay." He places a hand on my cheek trying to soothe my thoughts away. I lean into his hand.

"I will write to you every day." I tell him, letting go of his hand to pull him into an embrace. His arms go around me, holding my waist tightly. "As I will do the same." He whispers, kissing the top of my head. We let go and I stare at his lips. One of his hands was still on my waist.

A tear fell from my eye. "Don't cry, darlin." He kisses it away. "I'm not." I lie.

He lets out a small, pain filled laugh. "Can I kiss you?" I ask. "You don't have to ask, my love." He tells me and I put my hand on the back of his neck as I pull him into a kiss. The touch of our lips leaves shivers down my spine. Igniting a fire within me and I never want it to go out.

I never wanted this feeling to go. Even when he left, I saved every letter he sent me. I waited for every letter to come. Writing back immediately.

Then a week passed where I got nothing. Then it turned to two weeks. I couldn't sleep, knowing there was something wrong. He wouldn't do that to me. He wouldn't stop writing to me for no reason. His last letter filled with love and affection. He couldn't have just lost that feeling with me. Something had to have happened. I ran to Ryan not knowing who else to go to.

Esther and him were eating together when I showed up. I looked like a mess. My hair hasn't been kept together, my clothing wasn't as neat as usual. The eye bags under my eyes showing how much sleep I haven't been getting. "Have you heard from him?" My voice was raspy and hoarse. Ryan's eyes faltered and I didn't know what that could mean. Anxiety filled me.

"Have you heard from him, Ryan?" I repeat myself. Esther stared at me sadly. Did she know something I didn't? Did everyone know something I didn't? "Ryan?" I ask.

"They can't find him." He tells me and my body straightens. "What do you mean they can't find him?" I ask.

"He was doing a stroll, he was by himself and hours passed. He never showed back up. I just got word from my Lieutenant. He hasn't been seen for two weeks. His horse came back but not him." He explains to me and I begin to feel dizzy. I grip on the wall beside me. "He could be found. They can find him." I say, it was mainly to myself. I started to spiral. Clutching my chest. "He might've um, he must've gotten lost. The horse possibly flung him off." I say to the two in front of me. "Running off without him, you know? Right?" Eyes filled my eyes as I look to them for reassurance but their faces don't give me what I wanted.

I lose it and begin to sob. Seconds later arms hold onto me. It was Esther. She tried to give me comforting words but nothing works. I soak her shirt as I cry.

I cry only to feel numb. The numbness growing as more weeks pass and nothing new is brought to Ryan or to I. He's officially a missing soldier. They want to call him a dead man but I won't let them. I won't let anyone call him a dead man. He's alive. I know it. He can't be dead.

I ended up getting moved to a new base, Esther and Ryan also were coming. There's been cases of animal attacks here. Draining blood from the bodies. It's incredibly strange. Us nurses are working hours on end, even going into the next day. Helping the villages around the base as we've been instructed to do.

I was told to go to one with Esther, and two other nurses. A few soldiers were guarding the village, Ryan was luckily one of them for Esther. They were the lucky couple. Somehow always getting put together. I was envious. Wishing that could've been Jasper and I and we never would've been separated. He never would've gone missing.

It was a late night and Esther and I were working the shift tonight. Working with children that had lost their parents. I was tired, holding a toddler in my arms. Esther was reading a story to the older children to get them to bed. The toddler I held was fast asleep. His slowed breathing only made my tiredness worse.

And eventually I accidentally fell asleep.

Waking up to the sounds of screaming outside of the tent. My eyes shot open, the toddler I once had in my arms was now in a crib beside me. I look around to find Esther but I couldn't see her. I count to make sure all the children were there and it seemed like one was missing. Maybe they were going to an outhouse is what I thought to calm myself but when I remember I woke up to screaming I go to the exit of the tent. Hearing another scream.

I look back to the sleeping children. None of them even flinching to the scream. I poke my head outside of the tent and see something run in front of me. I gasp, getting back into the tent.

I back away not knowing what to do. It was fast. Faster than a human, faster than any animal I've ever seen.

I look around and find a metal stick that's to control fires. I step outside of the tent. Hearing a scream again. This time I realize it's Esther's screams. A child crying with it. My heart begins to race and I run towards the sound. Staying quiet.

I look up to see smoke, along with light further in the village. I grip the stick and head towards the fire. It was a stupid idea but I couldn't just let Esther die. Along with that poor child.

As I get closer I see Esther holding the child. There were people standing around her and she was cornered. I didn't know what to do. I stood there like a coward. Like a fool.

I am a fool.

I didn't even notice the man that stood behind me. The man who grabs me, covering my mouth as he bites into my neck. I let out a muffled scream. I feel my blood draining from my body but it stops and my body drops to the ground. I see a woman attacking the man who just bite me.

I feel immense pain growing in my neck. I sweat from the pain. I groan, gritting my teeth together. The woman comes over to me and I stare at her in fear. Her eyes were red and she wasn't a woman. She seemed to be a teenager. "Who-" I grunt trying to speak but she just shushes me. It seems like she's about to kill me but a man shows up behind her. "Hold." He says.

"She's a strong one." His eyes were wide as he stares at me. I sit myself up, leaning on the wall, still breathing heavily from the pain. "Who are you!?" I scream out, still holding my neck. The pain growing throughout my body.

"Shh." He puts a finger to his lips. I glare at him, confused on why they are shushing me. I'm confused on why a bite from a man is hurting so badly. Burning my insides.

"What is happening to me?" I beg to know.

I don't get an answer though. I don't get an answer, I never do. Three days of agonizing pain. They left me in an empty village that was killed off.

I sat against a wall the entire time. The only sight I see is the body of the child I never saved along with Esther who still held that child. Even while dying. And the man that attack me with no head beside me.

The sky changing was the only thing that kept me going. Begging that this would pain end eventually.

And when it did I stood up. A strong smell filling my nose. The smell of blood but stronger than usual. I felt feral.

I walk towards the smell, it was coming from the children's tent, the one Esther and I were in three days ago. The night it happened.

I enter inside, seeing the bodies of the dead children. I cover my mouth and nose, smelling their blood. Making me weirdly hungry. I felt disgusted with myself. I felt like I was stopping myself from doing something I know I shouldn't do.

I hear a small voice and I groan out, the feeling getting stronger. My eyes shoot around the tent needing to know where it's coming from. I see movement beside a crib and I go over to it in a fast motion I didn't even know I could make. I see a woman lying there. I worked with her. She's one of the nurses. She seems to be waking up. Her eyes open and look at me as I stand over her. "[Name]?" She mumbles and I just stare at her not knowing what to do but I know that my urges are to suck on the blood from inside her body.

"[Name] are you okay?" She asks me, starting to sit up, my nostrils flair. I start to breathe out of my nose heavily. "You're acting weird." She holds her head and I try to back up but it feels like my body is stuck in place. I see blood from the side of her forehead.

She goes to speak to me again but in a quick motion I'm biting on her neck and draining the blood from her body. She tries to scream but she can't. I feel someone behind me but I don't care enough in this moment as I feel like I've been starving.

Hands wrap around my body and pull me away from the woman that I can't remember the name of. "You've drained her completely, hun." A gentle voice tells me and I glance up to see a blond man with golden eyes staring back at me. "Who are you?" I push him away from me, he grunts but doesn't seem to be surprised by my response.

"My name is Carlisle. I just want to help you." He tells me but I hold myself, backing away from him. "Help me with what?"

"Don't you want to know what you are? Why you just fed off of a human?" He questions me and I glance from him over to the woman's body on the ground.

"You're a vampire. You're not human anymore." He informs me. I snort out a laugh. "Those are myths." I shake my head.

They were myths, but I guess they actually exist. Carlisle told me everything I needed to know. He taught me how to control my hungry and only go after animals. Controlling my thirst around humans.

We learned I have an ability. He told me how some have them. I turned out to be one of them. I can make people forget what they're thinking about in that current moment. Make them forget things that happened ten minutes ago and replace their thoughts and memories with something different. We found it out when we were caught eating off an animal by a hunter. We didn't want to kill him and I somehow focused on him and I was begging him to forget everything. Somehow it worked.

Now we've been practicing on random people.

Carlisle has truly been the biggest help in this whole weird thing.

I told him I wasn't staying with him though. I needed to find what happened to Jasper. I told him about Jasper, about how he was the love of my life. I never told him his name though. I wanted to keep my human life private. It was nothing against the man that saved me but I just wanted to keep certain things to myself. And Jasper was mine. He wasn't for everyone to know about.

And after both Carlisle and I knew we were okay on our own we went separate ways but I told him if he ever needed me I'll be in this area. I gave him my name so he can always look me up. I'd be there to help him with whatever it was.

I spent decades, over a century trying to find anything about Jasper but it was like he disappeared off the face of the earth. No one saw him. I couldn't find anything about him. Nothing about his death. I searched everywhere. Even going into oceans to see if his body was dropped in them. Lakes, the desserts around to see if he was in small areas no one could find him.

Nothing. No trace.

It was the 2000's and still nothing. I had given up at one point. Once it hit 1982. It had been over 110 years since my love went missing. A part of me hoped he became what I have. The selfish part of me. The other hopes he's in heaven, getting everything good that he deserves.

I still traveled, hanging out with random covens for a couple years before moving onto the next thing. That's how it's been for years.

Until I got a call from Carlisle Cullen. The man who saved me from damnation. "Have you heard what's happening in Seattle?" Was the first words out of his mouth. "Yeah, I thought the Volturi would've taken care of it by now." I answer him, crossing my arms as I stood outside of an alley in Chicago Illinois.

"We thought so too. But it looks like they're coming to Forks. We have a human they're after." He tells me and I furrow my eyebrows confused on why they would be protecting some random human. "I'll explain when you get here. We need your help." He says and I stiffen, licking my teeth.

"I'll be there in a couple hours." I tell him before hanging up the phone. He didn't need to explain anything. I'd help him with whatever he asks me to do. Even if it was against my morals. It's Carlisle.

And then I was on my way to Forks, Washington.

I pull up to a beautiful house, lots of glass, doesn't really hide anything. It fits Carlisle though. And his wife Esme. I met her once when I bumped into Carlisle. She had just turned. She was a lovely lady. Only got a few days to know her though.

She matched him perfectly.

I park my car and get out, Carlisle, two men, Esme and the human girl were standing on the porch. I raise my eyebrows. "A welcome party, oh you shouldn't have, Carlisle and Esme." I comment cheekily, walking towards them.

"Anything for you [Name]." Esme smiles to me and I grin back to her. "This the human girl we're fighting newborn vampires for?" I cross my arms,  observing the brunette in front for me. She was nervous but she was observing me back. One of the boys pushes her behind him.

"Who are you?" I ask with a smirk. "This is Edward. That's Bella, his girlfriend." Carlisle explains to me. "And this is Emmett." Esme points over to the other boy. "Got yourself a little family now, cute." I hum quietly.

"There's others as well. Let's go introduce you." Carlisle says and they lead me into the house. There were three other people standing in the living room. A man and two women. We get closer and the three turn to me. My eyes widen when I see the mans face. He looked exactly like Jasper...

I walk closer to him. Eyebrows scrunched together. It looked like he recognized me as well. "Jasper Whitlock?" I say the name that almost seemed foreign at this point. "Darlin?" He smiles back and my face falls before pulling him into my arms rather harshly.

"Jasper Whitlock!" I squeal as he lifts me up, I grab his face kissing him aggressively, my legs wrapping around his waist.

"I thought I'd lost you!" I cry out, no tears coming out of course. All he does is hum in response, kissing me once again. "You have been with Carlisle Cullen for how long!?" I jump down asking him. "Since 1953." He tells me and I close my eyes putting my head down.

"I've been searching oceans for you for over a century and a half." I tell him. "And you've been with one of my closest allies for 50 of those years." I whisper. "I could've been with you for 50 years." I lay my head on Jasper's chest.

I then turn to everyone who was just watching the scene confused. Except for Carlisle.

He was the only one either of us told each other about and he didn't even know it was about one another. I didn't let go of Jasper the entire time they told me about what was happening.

Having to reconcile with my lover after the explanation. I got introduced to Rosalie and Alice. Alice was a nice girl, she was super excited for Jasper and I. She kept going on and on about how amazing it was until Carlisle pulled her away so we could catch up on everything.

And when it was just the two of us, I look at him. My eyes piercing into his. "I never thought I'd see you again." He tells me earnestly. "Where did you go?" I ask, my voice breaking slightly. "I stopped getting letters, no one could find you." I tell him and he frowns.

He explains how a vampire named Maria turned him, forcing him to be her right hand man. He told me about his abilities which led me to tell him about mine. About how and when I turned. I told him about Esther and Ryans horrible fate.

How for the past century I literally searched bodies of water for him along with the desert he disappeared at. He told me how he heard about the base attack and heard I was there. He thought I was dead this whole time.

"I am never leaving your side ever again." I tell him with a serious expression.

"I would never want you to." He pulls me onto his lap, kissing me on my lips.

"I love you, I'm such a fool for not calling out your name to Carlisle." I lay my forehead on his.

He kisses me once more. “I am a fool as well, darlin.”

—————————

This was 6000 words. 😕

It took me almost all day.

I hope you enjoyed is all I’m going to say right now.

[lafrexniere]

Don't Change - LN4

Note: My bf gets back in one day!!! So I will be pumping probably either none or a lot of stories out tonight and tomorrow!!

Summary: Insecure reader needs cheering up from her boyfriend 🥰

You had been feeling insecure lately as your boyfriend was getting busier with F1 season picking up. You thought there was something wrong with you because all he wanted when he got home was to just play video games and go to bed. You had still spent some time together during the week but the weekends were distant. When you were out on weekends you felt like you were just his accessory, you looked nothing like the other girlfriends. Your hair would not cooperate when you tried to curl or straighten it, it would always end up messy, no matter what product you used, and you never put on a full face of makeup no matter how much you wanted to because you either felt it was too heavy and it was running as you were outside sweating it off, or that you put on too much and would end up wiping it off anyway. You always tried put on your best look and still felt bad about yourself. 

You woke up that off weekend with Lando next to you in bed. You went to the bathroom and looked at yourself in the mirror and it didn’t feel like you were looking at yourself. The light from the bathroom must have woken him because appeared right behind you wrapping his arms around your neck leaning on your shoulder as you rested your palms on the counter. 

“I’m thinking about cutting my hair,” you said looking in the mirror, “it’s too curly, maybe if I cut it shorter it will be easier, and look better,” you said pulling the ends trying to straighten it yourself. 

“No don’t do that, I love your hair the way it is baby,” he smiled kissing your cheek, backing out of the bathroom taking you with him. You joined him back in bed scrolling on your phone looking at different clothes, something that would get his attention more. 

“Do you like this,” you angled your phone at him, he half smiled and shook his hand giving you a so-so.

“If you wore it I think you would look pretty, but you already look pretty love,” he said pecking your cheek again before turning back on his side. You rolled your eyes as he turned away from you and continued looking at all these beautiful models in these clothes. You sighed as you scrolled, trying to get Lando’s attention. 

“What’s wrong,” he asked. You looked at him then went back to looking at your phone. He ripped your phone out of your hands putting it behind him forcing you to look at him.

“Lan stop,” you said. 

“No, tell me what did I do, what’s wrong,” you could see the sincerity in his eyes as he rested his hand on your thigh. 

“I just, I don’t feel good enough, I try my best and feel like I’m never look good enough,” you said avoiding eye contact. He sat up fully taking your hands in his.

“Y/N, you are so beautiful don’t say that, I love you just the way you are, don’t change please,” he said. You looked up at him slightly before he pulled your head to his chest. 

“I love your wavy hair, and the little curls in the front around your face,” he said twirling a strand with his finger. You sat up looking at him, looking at his curls and the little strands hanging by his face.

“Is there something else?”

“The weekends, I don’t know, just when we are here it feels like we are in two different worlds,” you said, “I feel like I overwhelm you and that’s why you just shut yourself in and play video games,” you felt your eyes to begin to water. 

“Baby, no, that’s not it at all, I’m just tired on the weekends that’s my way of unwinding, and you don’t overwhelm me, I want you to talk to me about things like this, I care about you so much even if I take that time to myself sometimes, I still care about you, I love you so much, please don’t overthink that,” he said still playing with your curls. 

“I know you love me,” you said wiping a tear that had escaped your eye.

“I love you forever, I promise, through all your insecurities, they are just things that make you even more beautiful to me, and I get them too, and you always talk me through it and everything works out, so don’t change to please me because you already do everyday.” You felt yourself holding back crying and couldn’t do it anymore, but the tears became happy. 

“Lando,” you sighed through crying eyes. He tucked a strand of hair behind your ear before pulling your face to his. You wrapped your arms around his neck, running your fingers through the ends of his hair. Your lips met his passionately as you could feel all the negative thoughts floating away.

“I love you,” you said as your lips parted briefly before meeting again. The two of you melted into the bed letting all your worries go and enjoying the quality time with each other.

[moonstruckme]

The other day I fell down the stairs of my building and had to just like. Get back up and go to work and my knees are all fucked up and I’m so sore. Do you think you could write doctor!remus or casual dom Remus when his girl tells him about it hours later? Or whatever you think is best story wise lol.

Don’t worry about it if not, your writing is literally my absolute favourite right now, you are so amazing!! -angie

Hi Angie, thank you for requesting <3

cw: blood

doctor!Remus x fem!reader ♡ 666 words (oooo)

When the car stops, Remus won’t let you get out on your own, which is embarrassing even though there’s no one but him around to witness it. Remus is overall in a horribly embarrassing mood. 

Though you tried to hide it, you’d noticed him noticing the stiffness in your legs as you walked out to his car after work, and before you’d had a chance Remus had reached over and buckled your seatbelt himself. The whole drive home he’d been spooky silent, occasionally shooting narrow-eyed looks to the blood stains on your work pants. 

“I’m okay,” you try to reason with him now, when he sets his hands on your hips to take some of your weight. “I’ve been walking all day, baby.” 

“I know, that’s worse.” Your boyfriend is huffy. He seems to be contemplating fully picking you up and carrying you inside. 

You press your lips together while he supports you the rest of the way to the door, holding you firmly to his side when he needs one hand to unlock it. The two of you go straight to the bathroom, where the dress you were originally going to wear to work today still lies on the floor. Remus frowns but doesn’t comment. 

When you’d taken a tumble on the concrete stairs outside your apartment this morning, you’d been running too late to be concerned with anything but looking presentable and getting to work. Your dress left your bloody knees exposed and made you feel like a child fallen from their bike, so you’d screwed up your mouth and forced a pair of work pants on over the burning cuts, then changed into an appropriate top to match. Your knees have been alternately stinging and aching all day, and when walking back home from work seemed too much you’d called your boyfriend for a ride. He seems determined to make you regret it. 

“Sorry,” you murmur after he lifts you onto the counter. 

Remus looks at you. “What for?” The question isn’t patronizing or a test. He wants to know. 

“For not telling you.” 

He sighs softly, looking down to fiddle with the button of your pants. You trace the cruel line of a scar from his forehead down to his cheek. 

“I wouldn’t mind so much if you’d taken the time to clean them properly,” he says. “But if you were in my place—lift your hips for me, love—and I called you to say I couldn’t get home by myself because I’ve been hurting all day and not done anything about it, wouldn’t you be a bit distraught?”

“I would,” you admit. You suck in a quiet breath when he starts pulling your pants down over your knees. 

“Sorry,” he says, unsticking the fabric from your ruined skin as gently as he can. They slide the rest of the way down far easier, and Remus kisses his teeth when your knees are revealed. “Dovey.” He sounds equal parts pitying and disappointed. 

“Sorry.” 

“Let’s stop trading apologies.” There’s the barest hint of humor in your boyfriend’s tone as he finishes tugging your pants off your ankles, letting them puddle on the floor and leaving you in your underwear. The countertop is cold on your bare skin. Remus wraps a hand around your thigh, careful of your knees as he leans forward to give you a kiss. “I’m not going to ask you not to do it again—although I hope you won’t—because I know you, but I get that you’re sorry, sweetheart.” His thumb swipes over the unbroken skin above your knee, lips turning down unhappily. “I’m sorry you hurt yourself, and that you’ve been in pain. I promise to try and lecture you about it as little as possible, okay?” 

You can’t help but smile, your voice coming out wry. “Thanks.” 

“You’re welcome, dove.” He gives your hip a condescending little pat. “You can make it up to me by sitting still while I take care of these and tell you about infection.” 

[verstappen-cult]

hiii idk if youre doing reqs rn but how about lestappen x reader where shes unused to being taken care of, having to succumb to the fact she needs help after an injury (nothing too graphic like maybe a sprained ankle or a broken wrist) and max and charles trying their best to make her understand that they *want* to help and that she has to let them and her yk kinda warming up to the idea idkkk😭 feel free to ignore it i js thought it was sweet✋️😔

You turn on the kitchen lights and Charles and Max are immediately pausing the game and turning around, surprised to see you supporting all your weight in your left leg, while keeping your balance by leaning against the wall.

Max is up in a blink of an eye. “What are you doing, sweetheart?” He helps you walk to one of the stools by the kitchen counter.

“I wanted something to eat.” You say, sitting down and trying not to show how relieved you are. Your ankle is still hurting but you don’t want to worry them.

“You could’ve just told us.” Charles joins you and Max in the kitchen. “What do you want?” He asks you while walking towards the fridge.

You wince, looking down at your hands. “I can prepare something. You’re busy.”

“We were just playing FIFA.” Max leans down to leave a kiss on your cheek. “We weren’t exactly busy.”

“Still,” You argue back, this time looking at your blonde haired boyfriend. “I can do it myself.”

“You’re supposed to be resting, or you’re not gonna get better.”

Charles is right.

And just because of that you accept his offer to make something to eat.

“I’d like some pasta, if it’s not too much trouble.”

Charles frowns as he takes all the ingredientes out of the fridge. “If it’s not too much trouble? Are you hearing yourself?”

Max gives him a disapproving look when he sees you look away.

“You sit here and we’re gonna take care of it, okay?” Max smiles before helping his boyfriend to avoid any incident like it always happens when Charles cooks. Or tries to.

While they’re occupied you think that is a good idea to take a shower to feel fresh and clean before dinner.

But the second you move to get up, Charles is by your side ready to help you.

It makes you feel a lot of things, some good and bad — especially some bad ones. Because the last thing you wanted was to cause trouble and have them running behind you to help with whatever you need, forcing them to cancel events to stay at home with you. Which is exactly what happened.

“What do you want?”

You groan, “I’m gonna take a shower.”

“I’ll run a bath for you.” Charles smiles brightly, forcing you to sit back down. But you don’t let him get away, grabbing his wrist.

“I can do it,” You feel stressed and a burden, and there are tears pricking your eyes. “You don’t need to do everything for me.”

Max stops chopping the vegetables to pay attention to you. “We know that,” He says with a weird expression on his face that you don’t really want to think about right now. “we’re trying to help you. You fell down and are in a lot of pain even if you want us to believe otherwise.”

You blush because you thought you were doing a pretty good job hiding how bad you actually feel.

“When we said that we want to take care of you, it was because we mean it. Nothing is more important than you.” Charles rubs his thumb over your knuckles, while you feel really small and scolded like a little kid.

“I just–,” You hide behind your hands, finally letting the tears fall freely down your face. “I don’t wanna be a burden.”

They stay silent for a few minutes. And then, you feel Max arms on your back while Charles lifts your chin up with his fingers. They look softly at you which only makes you cry harder.

“Oh, princess.” Max wipes the tears with the pad of his fingers. “We love you. Of course we want to take care of you and help with anything you need. You’re never gonna be a burden for us, okay?”

“I know you’d do the same for us.” Charles lets you rest your head against his chest as the both of them hold you in their arms. “Will you let us take care of you?”

You want to say no, but deep down you want to be taken care of. But you’re so used to doing everything by yourself, you never had someone worrying this much for you, never had someone who cared. And now you don’t have one but two people willing to drop everything just to take care of you.

You nod against Charles’ chest, tears still flowing down your face, and whisper, “Okay.” Even if you still want to fight against it and do everything by yourself.

Maybe things need to change a little.

[cevansbrat0007]

https://x.com/auxgod_/status/1854935706742706397?s=46

ari’s reaction if bird tried to walk out the house with this on 👀

Untitled Sweet Renegade Series Ask & Drabble

Please enjoy the Sweet Renegades Series Drabble found after the cut. Warnings include: Mature Themes, Implied Smut, Ari Being a Possessive Menace, Brat!Reader, Manhandling, Crude Language, and Cursing. Minors DNI.

Listen, Ari considers himself to be a rather progressive man. He has two sisters that he respects and adores. And a little niece that fills him with pride. He plans to teach his nephew about the importance of respecting women - of treating them with the utmost reverence and care.

However, the moment Ari laid eyes on his sweet, stubborn little Bird, it was if something in him snapped. It came from somewhere deep. Primal. And the beast in him demanded that he stake his claim. Before her, Ari had never really considered himself to be the possessive type. He just assumed that jealousy wasn't a part of his makeup.

But now? Her smile. Her laugh. Her light. Every delicate inch of her gorgeous curvy body. All of it belongs to him. In the most primal, feral sense.

And he does not like to share.

So, while he wants to encourage Bird as she continues down the path of consistent, healthy body positivity, he's also man enough to admit that that there's no way in hell he'd let her fine ass out of the house wearing a dress like that. And here's why:

"Baby..." He rasps, caging you in as he backs you against the door. "You look fucking stunning." Two thick fingers trail their way down your body, stopping once they reach the valley between your breasts. "But I'm afraid I can't let you leave. Not while you're wearin' that."

"What's wrong with it?" Your words come out as a gasp when you feel a hand wind its way into your curls, holding you still as he continues his assault. The seconds drag on as his head dips, his mouth finding yours.

"Because, sweet Bird." Ari presses, forcing you to take his delicious weight. Making your pulse spike as he grinds his increasingly hard cock against your abdomen.

"B-because?"

"Because..." He draws out the word as he wrenches your head back so that he can whisper maddening little love bites along the curve of your jaw. "This is the kinda dress you wear when you're out with your man." You have a hard time breathing as his free hand skims lower before coming to rest on the swell of your bottom.

"Oh yeah?" You continue to goad - against your better judgement.

To be honest, you'd known what you were risking when you saw the dress hanging on the rack. You had no business playing with fire. But that's part of what made all of this so fun.

"Absolutely." Ari's normally bright blue eyes darken with arousal as he watches your chest heave. Almost as if he's imagining what it might be like to slowly peel the garment off you, piece by piece. "Because these hips and that ass - they're enough to give a man ideas."

His soft lips find their way to your ear, his warm breath making you shiver.

"And when they start wantin' to entertain those ideas," he muses, more to himself than you. "I need to be there as your man to shut 'em down."

"I see." A sharp nip of teeth has you clenching your thighs together.

"Because I am the only man who's allowed to know what it's like to bury myself between those luscious thighs." Using two fingers, he tips up your chin, wordlessly demanding that he look you in the eyes. "And only I get to know what you taste like when you cum on my tongue. Which therefore makes me the only man with exclusive rights to your tight, little pussy."

"Okay Beast." You can't help the giggle that bubbles its way out of your throat. "I think you've made your point."

"Have I, little Bird?" He growls, releasing his grip on your chin to capture your wrists, trapping them above your head. "Or do I need to remind you that I'm not the sharing type?"

The steady tick in his jaw lets you know that you and your dress have once again pushed this man to the edge. But the real question was...

Just what did you plan to do about it?

Batting your lashes up at him, you decide it's time to let the brat in you win out once and for all. Go big or go home, you know?

"Eh, it's been awhile, big guy." You purr, catching your bottom lip between your teeth. "I'm thinkin' you might need to refresh my memory."

END

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[mind-intheclouds342]

A new ladder - Reader x Curly

Previous - Part 3 - Next

"What would you like to do today?"

You leaned against the back of the sofa to look at Curly, who was attentively watching the news.

Curly: "Is there something we can do?"

"We could do something like physical therapy... is that what it's called? So that you can use those prosthetics, wouldn't you like to be able to walk again?"

Curly: "You look enthusiastic."

"I'm bored"

You let out a sigh of pure sincerity as you lay down on the sofa, head bowed, barely four days into being with him and hardly ever leaving the house.

Curly: "We can chat."

"Seriously, don't you want to do something?"

Curly: "Of course, but... I don't want to bother you, you're already doing too much."

"You could ask me to tap dance on the table and I would do it just to laugh at something."

You raised your head and stared at him, waiting for some kind of response.

Curly: "What do you want to do?"

"Have you ever ridden a horse?"

Curly: "....No?"

Before he could realize it, you had already made the trip in your car to take him to a field outside the city.

There you had met with a friend of yours, who welcomed you warmly and guided you to an area where there were several horses.

Curly was able to see how your friend helped you get on one of the horses, you had a huge smile, and then he helped him get on with you, ending up in front of you.

Immediately, you put your hands around his waist to hold him close to you, while the horse began to gallop slowly around the meadow.

Behind him again, I could hear your little laughs, this time more relaxed, just a sound of the pleasant moment you were having.

Curly was observing his surroundings, feeling the movement of the animal. The place was beautiful, the trees, the bushes, the flowers, the sky, the clouds, for a moment he had forgotten how incredible the world was, feeling a lot of tranquility.

You spent at least half an hour riding and walking around that field, and at one point you almost fell off the horse because there was a little colt that wanted to bother the one you were riding, until its mother arrived and scolded it.

When you returned to the car, after thanking your friend for the experience, Curly felt that the day had ended and they were going back to monotony.

But he realized that the path you took was not the same one to return home.

You drove up a small hill and parked where the car wouldn't cause too much trouble.

"Do you want to climb?"

Curly: "Do you think I can-?"

He couldn't finish the sentence because you had surrounded him with your arms, forcing him to get out of the car. The prosthetics on his legs barely kept him standing, and he leaned against your body to avoid falling.

You closed the car door with your foot and waited patiently for the man to stand up.

Your arms were still around him, preventing him from falling completely. He tried to hold onto you as he straightened up, finally standing, swaying and looking at your face.

Curly: "Don't do this to me..." He sighed, lowering his head.

"Am I hurting you?"

Curly: "Emotionally"

You felt how he rested his forehead on your shoulder, standing there without moving, with your hands clasped together, forming a ring around his waist.

Curly: "I can't... I don't deserve it... All this... The surgeries... The attention... The prosthetics... I don't deserve to stand up again or take a step forward myself-"

You let go of him at that moment, causing him to fall to the ground, sitting and looking at you confused.

You crouched down to his level to closely examine his face.

"It's going to relax you to walk a bit, let's go again."

You said to him with a smile and helped him stand up again, this time putting his prosthetic arm over your shoulders and keeping your arm around his waist.

He felt strange being accompanied in that way, it made him feel so vulnerable, reminding him of the fragile condition he was in.

You didn't stop holding onto him for a second while you took short and slow steps, being as careful as possible.

It was just a few meters to reach the top where there was a beautiful meadow, but it took you several minutes to get there due to the pace you were going.

You made Curly sit among the grass and tall flowers of that place, soon you sat down beside him, reclining there immediately.

He kept looking at you, how you just lay there with a smile on your lips, your eyes closed, and breathing deeply.

Slowly, he lay down beside you, observing the sky; the clouds in that place looked different from those in the city, it seemed that by raising your hands you could touch them.

Curly: "Why did you bring me here?"

"A place so beautiful must be shared, so more can appreciate it."

Curly: "...Why are you doing this? You should just give me my medicine, you could leave me locked up at home if you wanted, and go out on your own."

"You think too much. Just relax"

You placed your hand on his chest to give him a couple of pats and then put your hands behind your head, enjoying the sun on your skin.

The warmth of the afternoon sun, which would soon set, was pleasant on his wounded skin. Despite having received a graft, his skin remained too sensitive, but those gentle rays of sunlight provided a pleasant warmth.

He decided to listen to you and relax; maybe that was what he needed.

[tortillamastersblog]

➶The Bet - Part 3 | Kate Bishop➴

Pairing: Kate Bishop x reader

Warnings: angst with happy ending

Summary: Being known as the quiet and reserved student, you mind your own business and stay out of people’s way.

Kate Bishop is the exact opposite. Outgoing, bubbly, and loud, she’s the definition of a popular girl, so it comes as a surprise when she asks you out on a random Thursday afternoon.

Previous Part | Next Part | Masterlist

________________________________________________

A knock on my door makes me look up from my laptop. “Yeah?”

Riley opens the door slowly and steps into the room with a plate of food in her hand. “Hey.”

She smiles tentatively and I force myself to smile back, rolling my chair back to look at her properly. “Hi. How was class?”

She sets the plate down on my desk before taking a seat on the edge of my bed. “Fine, but boring without you.”

I hum to acknowledge her before changing the subject by gesturing at the food and asking, “What’s this?”

I know she’s itching to ask me when I’ll go back with her, but I’m not ready to answer that question yet.

Since I stormed out of Kate’s apartment a little over a week ago, I haven’t gone to class because I don’t want to risk running into her or her friends.

Riley doesn’t know what happened, but she’s known something’s up ever since I came home in tears after my date with Kate. She doesn’t push me to tell her about it though and helps me stay on track with all of our classes by sharing her notes with me.

“You haven’t been eating properly lately, so I made you some dinner,” she says quietly and a little hesitantly as if she’s afraid of my reaction.

My grip on my pen tightens and I glance at the food. She’s right. I haven’t been eating and I haven’t really been sleeping either. All I do is study, run until my legs are numb, and stand in the shower, staring at the wall until my eyes hurt.

I can’t get over how Kate used me. She was so sweet and kind and I still can’t believe all of it was an act.

I guess it just goes to show that my mother was right, always telling me I was naive for believing in the good in everyone.

“Thank you,” I whisper. “But I’m not really hungry.”

Eating makes me feel sick. I can only stomach a piece of toast or some fruit.

Riley sighs and slides off the bed so she’s kneeling in front of me. She takes my hands into her own and squeezes. Her eyes are full of concern and her eyebrows are furrowed. “I know, but you have to eat. I’m worried about you, Y/N.“

I avert my eyes, but don’t pull my hands out of her grip. “I’m fine, Rye.”

“No, you’re not,” she argues quietly, squeezing my hands again, “and that’s okay. You’re allowed to hurt and process whatever happened, but not like this. Your body needs food, and sleep, and rest. . .”

Tears prick my eyes at the emotion lacing her words and all of a sudden I feel guilty for acting like this, for making her worry and look after me. “Riley, I—“

“You don’t have to tell me what happened,” she cuts me off quickly. “But please let me take care of you if you’re not going to do it yourself.”

I take a shuddering breath and nod, blinking away my tears before meeting her hazel eyes with my own. “Okay.”

“Good.” She stands up and ruffles my hair playfully. “Now eat. I’m going to do the dishes, but as soon as I’m done, we’re watching a movie. You’ve been brooding long enough now and it’s about high time you spent some quality time with your favorite person again.”

I chuckle at that and nod again, watching her leave before taking a tiny bite of the pasta she brought me.

“An orbital is a three dimensional description of the most likely location of an electron around an atom. There are four types of orbitals: s, p, d and f. . . They are combined when bonds form between atoms and—“

I stop listening to Professor Jenkins and take off my glasses, pinching the bridge of my nose. Letting Riley convince me to join her today was a mistake. I can’t focus on anything other than avoiding Kate and her friends in the hallways.

Another week has passed since our date, making it two weeks now since we last spoke, but I’m still no closer to getting over what she did than I was the night it happened.

A nudge makes me snap out of my thoughts. “You good?” Riley whispers.

I put my glasses back on and shrug. “I don’t know.”

Riley frowns and watches me for a moment before tearing a blank piece of paper out of her notebook. She hands it to me and smiles hopefully “Here. Make me something pretty.”

I stare at it for a second before taking it with a thankful smile. My dad taught me origami when I was a kid and it always eases my anxiety, so I get to work folding a crane.

It’s not very difficult, but it takes some time, so by the time I’m done, class is over.

“Very cute.” Riley says when I present the crane to her. “Now let’s go home. I’m starving.”

We pack up our stuff and make our way out of the lecture hall. It’s already dark outside and I’m dreading the walk to Riley’s car because it started to snow a couple of hours ago and I didn’t bring a proper jacket with me.

The hallways are crowded because several classes just ended, but I still spot the last person I wanted to see making her way through the sea of people, heading my way.

Our eyes meet and I freeze, forcing Riley to stop as well.

“What’s wrong?” she asks, but then she follows my line of sight. “Oh.”

“Y/N!” Kate calls out, bumping into a group of people without apologizing.

“Rye,” I say desperately, my eyes meeting Rileys. “I-I can’t. . . I can’t— Not now.”

She nods and steps in front of me to block my view of Kate. I’m taller than her, so I can easily look over her shoulder and still see her, but the thought counts and I love her even more for it.

“Okay. Okay. Take my keys and go. I’ll meet you at the car,” she says, pushing her car keys into my hand. I turn around to leave, but Kate’s voice makes me freeze again.

“Y/N! Wait, please!”

I have half a mind to turn around, but then Riley shoves me. “Go. I’ll deal with her.”

I mouth a thank you and weave through the crowd, effortlessly escaping before Kate can get to me.

“So? What did she want?” I ask quietly as soon as Riley gets into the car. She cups her hands and lifts them to her mouth, blowing into them in an attempt to get some warmth back.

I’m sitting in the driver’s seat, so as soon as she closes her door, I put the keys into the ignition and start the car. She doesn’t mind that I drive her car sometimes, especially not after a long day of classes.

“She wouldn’t say, but she really wants to talk to you,” she says and I feel her eyes on me as I pull out of the parking lot.

“Hmm.”

I know she wants to know what happened, but she still doesn’t dare to ask, and I honestly admire her self restraint.

My grip on the steering wheel tightens for a moment before I sigh and glance at Riley.

She’s watching me with a mix of concern and curiosity on her face. It makes my resolve to keep what happened to myself crumble.

Coming to a stop at a red light, I push my glasses up the bridge of my nose before looking at her again. “Rye.”

“Yeah?”

I take a deep breath. “Kate. . . used me,” I start slowly, watching her for a reaction. “Asking me out was just part of a bet she made with her friends.”

Riley’s eyebrows shoot up. “What?!”

“Yeah.” I sigh and start driving again as soon as the light turns green. “I found out after she kissed me. Her phone was connected to her computer and her friends kept texting her about it and I saw all the messages.”

“What the fuck?” Riley’s voice shakes and before I know it she’s told me to pull over so she can give me a hug. “I’m sorry, Y/N. That’s so messed up. You’re the kindest and most selfless person I know, and you deserve the world. Kate is a bitch.”

If my heart didn’t hurt the way it does I would have chucked at that. I tighten my arms around her and close my eyes.

You deserve the world. . .

Her words fill me with warmth and when we pull back I press a kiss to her cheek. “Thank you.”

She smiles and flicks a tear off my cheek. “You’re welcome. Now, let’s go home.”

I nod and pull back onto the road while Riley connects her phone to the car’s bluetooth system to play some music.

“You know, Grace from my dance class is pretty cute,” she says and even though I’m focused on the road I know she’s smirking. “If you want I can set you up with her. She’s sweet and blushes every time you pick me up.”

I snort and can’t stop my lips from twitching into a smile. “Yeah, right.”

Grace is cute and I have noticed her crush on me, but I’ve never acted on it. Not because I can’t see myself in a relationship with her, but because until Kate came along, I couldn’t see myself in a relationship with anyone.

“I’m serious.” Riley laughs and changes the song. “She always asks how you are and every time you don’t pick me up, she’s disappointed she didn’t get to see you.”

My ears turn red at that revelation and I have to clear my throat before responding. “Yeah, no. . . I know you’re right, but—“

“But what?” She whines playfully. “You guys would be perfect together! She’s a great listener, she’s smart, and she’s a total nerd just like you!”

I scoff and shoot her a glare. “Excuse me? I’m not a nerd.”

“Oh please, you’re like the king of nerds, but that’s not my point. My point is, you guys would make a great couple, and you know it!” She raises an eyebrow as if to challenge me to disagree.

She’s right. Based on the few interactions I’ve shared with Grace, I know we get along pretty well, but after what happened with Kate I feel like I can’t trust anyone with my heart anymore. Well, anyone except Riley, but that’s different. She’s family.

I turn onto our street and stop the car in front of the gate of our building’s underground parking garage. “Okay, okay. I see where you’re coming from, but I can’t, Riley. Not now.” I say, quietly adding, “Not after what Kate did.”

I roll down the window and punch in the gate’s code on the keypad, waiting for it to open before driving into the garage.

Riley sighs and runs her hand through her hair. “Okay. Maybe not now, but keep her in mind for when you’re ready to go out again.”

When, not if. . . She honestly believes I will ever go on a date again after what happened. Yeah right. . . No, I’m staying single for the rest of my life.

Not in the mood to disagree, I just nod and pull into a parking spot. “Fine. Can we talk about something else now?”

“A fundraiser?” I stare at the flyer Riley just handed me. “You honestly expect me to go to this? I literally have no money to donate. Unlike you, I’m broke as fuck. They should raise money for me.”

The lecture hasn’t even started yet and I’m already over it. Today is Friday, and yet another week has passed since what happened with Kate.

I’ve managed to avoid her since last week, not even catching a glimpse of her in the hallway, and it’s making it easier to get over her.

“Oh, come on! We’ll go together. I think it could be fun. I’ll even donate something in your name,” Riley pleads, refusing to take back the flyer when I try to hand it to her.

I roll my eyes and take out my laptop, getting ready for class. “You mean your parents are going to donate something in my name.”

Riley waves me off. “Eh. My parents, or me? It doesn’t matter. The money comes from the same account. . . So, is that a yes?”

I look up to meet her eyes and even though I want to say no, the excitement that shines in her eyes makes me reconsider. Instead of straight up agreeing though, I compromise and say, “Maybe. When is it?”

“Yay! Thank you! It’s tomorrow night.” Riley pats my cheek playfully which makes me slap her hand away with a chuckle.

She pulls out her phone and texts her parents, giving me the opportunity to watch the students filing into the lecture hall while my laptop is turning on.

Some faces are familiar, others aren’t. Most of them yawn and carry coffee cups, but others are chatting animatedly with their friends.

I don’t get people who have this much energy in the morning. . .

I let my gaze wander around the room, not looking at anything in particular. That is until my eyes land on her.

She just walked in, dressed in a purple cashmere sweater and jeans, her jacket is draped over her arm and her hair is pulled back in a low bun.

She looks good even though I hate to admit it, but something about her seems off and it takes me a couple of seconds to realize why.

She’s not talking to anyone like she normally would, and her usually bright smile is no where in sight. She also has dark circles under her eyes and her eyes lack their usual brightness.

All in all, she looks exhausted and a tiny part of me—the one that still hangs onto the way she smiled at me and kissed me— feels bad for her.

That feeling, however, vanishes the moment she looks up and her blue eyes meet mine. It’s almost as though she felt me staring.

Oh no, she’s going to want to talk again. I shrink down in my chair and mentally prepare for the seemingly inevitable conversation we’re about to have.

Much to my surprise though, it never comes, because Kate averts her eyes a moment later and turns to take a seat on the other end of the lecture hall.

I don’t know if I should feel relieved or disappointed. On one hand, I’m glad I don’t have to face her because I’m still hurting. On the other hand though, I have a need for closure because I still don’t know why she did what she did.

“Okay, I talked to my parents and they would be happy to donate a little somethin’ somethin’ in your name in case you decide to come,” Riley says, turning off her phone.

I stop staring at the back of Kate’s head, still caught up in my thoughts, and nod absentmindedly. “Alright. Thank you.”

I hate this. I hate feeling like this and I wish I could turn back time. Not to stop myself from agreeing to go out with Kate, but to close the laptop as soon as I saw Greer and Franny’s messages. That way I would have never known about the bet and things between Kate and I would have fizzled out on their own.

“Good morning, everyone!” Professor Lopez walks into the classroom, putting an end to my spiraling thoughts. “Today we’re going to talk about chirality, but first— Your lab reports from last week. . .” He starts handing out our graded reports and I can’t help but glance at Kate one last time when he reaches her.

He doubled checks the name on her report, seemingly surprised, before giving it to her with a frown. “Please, see me after class, Miss Bishop.”

________________________________________________

Okay, I lied. It’s going to be four parts after all and not just three.

Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this one and I’m sorry for the delayed update.

Love,

Soph <3

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