#because if phoebe wants the perfect kiss he's going to give it to her! he's committed to the bit!

[yesyourstalker]

Neta: *sigh*....... .......

Ikkan: nervous?

Neta:......a little bit yeah.....

Ikkan: *hehehe*...... Don't be nervous, you have nothing to be nervous about I'll be right here.... And after this I'll be here forever

Neta: till death do us part

Ikkan: till death do us part...(Peck).... Fix your tie....and ..... perfect.....now.......let's get married

[wedding music]

officiant: Good evening everyone, friends family we are guided here today to celebrate life's greatest moments and to cherish the words which shall unite Neta Verns

Neta: *smiling*.....*sniff*.......hehe

Officiant: and Ikkan Kane

Ikkan: *smiling*.....*sigh*.....

Officiant: you would like to exchange your vows

Neta: I'd like to go..............*sigh*...... ikkan.... I always look back and remember the first time we first met.

Ikkan: heheh

Neta: you were very standoffish and quiet heh You're also a little bit mean just a little bit

Ikkan: heheh

Neta: If something told me that that really wasn't you. I'm so happy My hunch was right. Ikkan You're kind, You're soft-spoken, you're so patient ....*crying*... I'm sorry........ Getting to see you everyday. Your smile, hearing your laugh and listening to you speak ....*sniff*...about your interest. Your passionate rants about Arpeggio and crescendo I still don't know what that means but I love hearing you say it....

Ikkan: ehhehehehe

Neta: that's the smile I like to see.... I love you Ikkan you're my best friend and I am truly grateful I'm going to live the rest of my life with you I-

[Alright he's been in there long enough. Pull him up]

Neta: what!?......... what!?..... what's happening!!....*cough*.....….*cough*.....what the fuck!!... what's going on?!

Octoling Superior: alright Verns you've been in the pit long enough. Time to get back to training. All chargers are outside doing target practice. Take your weapon and go out with the rest of them.

Neta: what?

Octoling Superior: go outside and do tragic practice. Your punishment is over go

Neta: but-but-but I was getting married! *huff* Where's my husband?! My store?! I had a store and my family.....*huff*..*huff*.... Cirrina......my daughter ......what happened to my crab cakes?!!.*huff*.......

Octoling soldier: *hehe* what's he talking about?

Octoling Superior: I've heard if you stay in the ink pit long enough without interaction the brain starts to hallucinate and starts making things up......to keep it self sane. He'll be fine.

Neta:*huff*huff**huff**sobbing**huff**huff**huff**huffhuffhuffhufff......AAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaah-HA!!.. what?…..huh?..................*huff*.........................*huff*...................*huff*............*huff*.........*huff*.......*huff*........ where is it? Where is it?... here.....*huff*...[squeeze]

Plushie recording: Hi! Demersal the grounding fish! I'm going to ask a few questions ok?... can you name 3 you can see?

Neta:... my dresser......*huff*...my bed....my bass

Recording:.............good job!.....can you tell 3 things you can feel?

Neta:...my bed sheets....my clothes....*huff*....cold floor.....

Recording:..........okay!!....can you tell me where you are?

Neta:......*sigh*....my apartment

Recording:...............good job! Do you know what time it is? The short hand is the hour and the long hand is the minute!

Neta: I know that.... it's...6:47a.m.

Recording:.............. wow! Now can tell me about yourself how old are you!

Neta: ......................35.......

Recording: .........wow! wow!you're so big!

Neta: fuckyou

Recording:what's your name?

Neta: Neta

Recording:.........that's a nice name! We're almost done let's count back to 10 together! Ready?!10,9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1

Neta 10,9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1......uggghh

Recording: you're doing so well let's take a deep breath ok? Breath in.....

Neta: [inhale]

Recording: now Breath out

Neta: [exhale]

Recording: you are safe.... I'm so proud of you! It's ok to feel overwhelmed sometimes. I know it can be really hard.. just Remember your grounding technique and don't forget to self-sooth!...stay safe hehe bye bye

Neta: you're lucky Behi gifted you to me...if it wasn't for him you would've been sold decades ago.........[chuck] ..............[inhale] [exhale]................ nibbles come here......Did I scare you off the bed?....*kiss*.. . I'm sorry..............hm?...

Mahi:*sleeping*....

Neta: heheh...*huff*...fish still here?.......heh makes sense...

_______________________________________________

Mahi: *yawn*..........ummm....uggg....... Neta you need to get a better couch this one sucks.....oh....

Neta: no.... I don't want you to come home... Not for something as dumb as a nightmare ..hehe....I'm fine.I know..i know I know babe I get that... You shouldn't have to drop everything for me..... I know you don't mind it but I do.... I hate that.... yeah I understand........ yeah........ yeah............................. You're right.......................*sigh*....no......I still don't want you to come home..... Can you at least stay on the phone with me for a while?....... Pancakes... I think I buried some hehehehe.....*sigh*... No.... it looks fine. A little dark in the middle..... It should be fine... You cook better than I do..... What are you doing?..... Why are you milking them by hand I thought you had a machine for that........ Oh she's scared of it? awwww poor manatee......... An hour? it takes an hour to get a full bucket of milk?....... Okay that's fair. They are big...I-(gasp).... Mahi!..[inhale exhale]........ How long have you been sitting there

Mahi: couple minutes..... Can I have a pancake

Neta:. .................... Yeah, I'm fine. No, it's just my employee, yeah fish still here......... I'll call you when I get to work..... I love you too...bye................... How many pancakes do you want?

_______________________________________________

Mahi: *eating*......

Neta:*eating*.......

Mahi: *eating*.... pancakes are good

Neta: *eating* thank you

Mahi: how do to make them shape like little octopuses

Neta:...Cirrina bought cookie cutter sets years ago. sometimes use them for molds for pancakes..... I use it for eggs too...*sniff*...........*sigh*............ I have to get ready for work.....[stretch].......[POP]...mmmmm......fuck not today knee...ssssss

Mahi:...*eating*....you know you really should try investing in a knee brace I think my friend has a couple of them I can see if she can give you one

Neta: that's nice........

Mahi: so I know you have to go to work and everything in a couple minutes. Would it be too much to ask to drive me to campus I got to go to the library and do some studying

Neta: Alright..... We'll leave 15 minutes... Do you have clothes to get dressed in?

Mahi: no

Neta: we can just find something in the drawer.....

Mahi: can I borrow these jeans?

Neta: Yeah sure. I don't think they don't fit you tho

Mahi: they fit me just fine I just need to cut the pants legs

Neta: *sigh*. . You know you might as well just take the rest of my old clothes. I'm never going to fit em again anyway

Mahi: really?

Neta: yeah really I insist I really don't care. You can have them

Mahi: are you sure?....

Neta: you know what I'll just give them to my daughter she doesn't listen to 'Cyrus in the cyclones' but I think she'll like the Cool vintage look of it

Mahi: no gimme! Don't give it to her! She'll just ruin it and turn it into a jagged uneven crop top! _______________________________________________

Ikkan: I finished milking tulip

Koi-koi: That's good hun. We'll have it pasteurized tomorrow. Just keep it in the fridge in the shed

Ikkan: alright

Cirrina: I'm going out..

Koi-koi: and where do you think you're going?

Cirrina: I need to go into the city The ferry leaves in an hour

Koi-koi: I don't think so. You haven't finished your chores you were supposed to refill the Manatee feed today and You're supposed to mix up the compost in the back.

Cirrina: I know I'll get to when I get back

Koi-koi: noooo... You will do it now. Young lady, I'm not like your father or your grandfather when I say do something you do it now. You can take the next ferry

Cirrina: but I-

Koi-koi: no buts young lady

Cirrina: I'm meeting someone

Koi-koi: meeting who Exactly?

Cirrina:.............a friend

Koi-koi: ....a friend? What friend?

Cirrina: (blush)......he's a boy

Koi-koi: a boy?.....

Cirrina: ... yeah....

Koi-koi: where is he taking you?

Cirrina: a museum, around town

Koi-ko:........ A museum?........................................,........ Be home by 9:00......... Here get yourself some food maybe a souvenir.

Cirrina: you're cool grandma....

Koi-koi: uh-huh whatever...... When you get home you'll do the chores that you were supposed to do and..... You wash the dishes

Cirrina: alright

_______________________________________________

Baja: did you see the commercial mom?

Baja's mom: I saw the commercial... I am so proud of you sweetheart You're going to be on TV how exciting

Baja: I know ... I still can't believe it

Baja's mom: this is going to open up so many opportunities. The benefits will be nice. You have a nice paycheck and a lot of money, make sure you save some of it. You're going to make so many new friends!!

Baja: yeah hehe I hope I do...

Baja's mom: I know you have problems making friends.

Baja: mmmmm

Baja's mom: You're a sweet boy you really are

Baja: thank mom

Baja mom: you know this might be the perfect time for you to find someone

Baja: fine who?

Baja's mom: A partner! Ohhhhhh I'm so happy for you honey. You can go on dates. You can meet new people. You'll be married in no time?

Baja: uhhhhh I guess....... I'm going to be really honest Mom. I don't really think I want to do that right now

Baja's mom: Well I don't want to rush you but it's good to start... You know your brother is already married and your sister is on her fifth kid...

Baja: Mom

Hine (Baja's mom): I know. I know I shouldn't compare my kids but let me just finish. Your siblings are no older than you and they've already have their lives set up and I don't want you to fall behind

Baja:Mom, I'm not falling behind. I-I just...ugh....... I'm just....... I'm just not good at dating and seeing people

Hine: What on Earth do you mean baby?! you're not good at dating? Honey, you're the most talkative and social person in the family! How could you think you're not good at dating? You're a real catch

Baja:.........

Hine: What about that fella you told me about? I looked him up, I didn't really like the images I saw .. what about him? I thought you liked him?

Baja: We broke up

Hine: you broke up?....*sigh*...... So you're single?........ So what are you just......... Are you just sleeping around?

Baja: (blush)..NO! I'M NOT

Hine:Sweetie, don't be embarrassed. A lot of young adults have casual sex ...I'm just saying you know eventually you need to settle down and-

Baja:I'm not.. I'm not..... I'm not having sex. I never had it

Hine:....…Well that's ok. Personally I waited to get married to-

Sibling: HA! VIRGIN!

Hine: Maui! What did I tell you about eavesdropping! Go!.............*sigh*....... Sweetheart..... I don't want to put pressure on you sweetie...... I just don't want you to be alone we're not good when we're alone... I want you to have a family

Baja: I'm not alone. I have a family. I have you and my siblings..........and Desmond I guess

Hine: we can't live forever honey you're going to need to find someone eventually.

Baja:................... alright..... I'll try to find someone...

Hine: I know you'll find someone there's someone out there for everyone including you sweetie....

Baja: ........ yeah.....l love you.... bye

Hine: I love you too

Baja:.....................danm

Hitch: we're filming in 15!

_______________________________________________

Bayou: this painting is a. Self-portrait of Joyce Veair she was our firat prime minister

Cirrina: wow... she's gorgeous she painted this herself

Bayou: Yes... She has so many paintings around the world. She even has one in Museum d'Alfonsino

Cirrina: really...... She's very talented.

Bayou: not only that, she was very intelligent and very outspoken....

Cirrina: what's this one

Bayou: this is a sculpture made entirely out of urchin spines it was made by tosh monui. Every month he'd shed his old spines. He would collect them and Stick them in a ball of wax until the ball was completely covered in spineies. After he'd take the rest to make a body, he would call them mace men because they look like maces with a body. He soon started to model them after cave drawings of primitive urchin

Cirrina: that's amazing....oh what's this one. This one is beautiful

Bayou: this one is called 'home'

Cirrina: it's a beautiful landscape....who is by?....... This piece was painted by One of the top students in krillarney School of arts and it's one of the youngest to be presented in This museum she has won several awards and has several nominations. We are privileged to have her in a museum This piece is called home by Bayou Ster..............wow same name as you

Bayou:.........ehehehehehe Cirrina. That's me this is my work.

Cirrina: oh..hehehe I'm stupid........ It's really nice. You're really talented....

Bayou: thank you.... This is one of my favorite paintings I used an old picture of my nan's old home.

Cirrina: I love the texture and the hills and trees. It's even in the river.... Do you have more paintings here?

Bayou: I have this big painting over here. This one took me a whole month to finish this one..... I rode the fairy everyday just to get the perfect reference for crashing waves

Cirrina: wow .. . it's amazing

Bayou: it's almost 6 do you want to get something to eat. We can go to Mrs Cuddles to get some fried cod and hush puppies

Mrs Cuddles: Harold, bring these pines to table 7!...

Bayou: hi Mrs Cuddles!

Mrs Cuddles: Bayou how are you darling, Cirrina! Ohhhh... You two hungry? Let me get you something Harold, drop two more cod in the fryer!!..... You to relax. I'll get you ladies some sodas while you wait

Bayou: thank you!

Cirrina: thanks............................................. So you're probably going to think I'm really dumb but for the past 3 days I thought you were a guy

Bayou:.............hehehehe Did you?.must be the tentacle cut huh?

Cirrina: hehehe... yeah...hehehe... I'm sorry.....

Bayou: If I'm being real here I don't identify with anything in particular...if you see me as a guy I don't mind it

Cirrina: if you don't identify as that I don't want to

Bayou: I see myself as everything and nothing, masculine and feminine and anything in-between. I really don't mind Cirrina

Cirrina: All right if you put it that way hehehe

Mrs Cuddles: here you go! Fresh cod and a large bag of hush puppies for the road!

Cirrina: thanks how much do I owe you?

Mrs Cuddles: nonsense it's on the house. Kiddies eat for free here. Once you reach the age to drink you have to pay

Cirrina: thanks Mrs Cuddles!....

_______________________________________________

Neta: *humming*...(Pat)..*humming*....(Pat)......

Ona:.........

Candi: *snoring*........*snoring*.......

Tv

Baja:What is music at midnight? Well as the names in the title says we're going to be talking about music and it's going to be airing during midnight.

Announcer: music at midnight a new late night talk show! Premieres tonight only on O.E.T!

Neta:.....*sigh*....... ikkan would love this show. .........me and him cuddling watching TV at midnight. Under a blanket surrounded by pillows...................... I miss him....

Ona: [baby noises]

Neta: yeah? You would like the show too Ona?

Bowie: what are you watching?

Neta: Bowie go back to bed. It's past your bedtime, go back upstairs with your mom

Bowie: but she snores too loud!

Neta: Bowie.. .... okay

Bowie: what's in this room?

Neta: noooo that's my daughter's room you can't go in there....let's sit down on the couch..... come on........(click).....why don't we watch 'Ollie? ...you like Ollie

Bowie: alright

Tv

[Music]........Mom!..[music].......Dad!.........[music].......Leo!......[music]...........OLLIE!

Bowie: hehe

Neta: you need to lay down. try to get some sleep before your dad picks you up. You start preschool soon, you need a proper sleep schedule.

Bowie: okay

Ona: [fussy baby noises]

Neta: you need to sleep too young lady ......

Ona [crying]

Neta: someone is hungry..... Come on baby girl. Let's get you something to eat and fresh dia-(gasp).....*sigh*..... I need to put a bell on you

Mahi: I need to finish my homework I won't be annoying I promise.

Neta: where's Baja should he be at home with you?

Mahi: He's at work... They're doing a test stream or something or whatever

Ona: [crying]

Neta:.......*sigh*... Alright ........ I have some left overs in the fridge if you want anything.... Can you watch Bowie? Just make sure he's sleeping or watching TV as long as he's quiet.....

Mahi: ......(typing) alright

Neta: come on Ona....

_______________________________________________

Cirrina: ..... that was pretty good

Bayou: Yes I go there every other Sunday....

Cirrina: I leave on Sunday.... Maybe I can get another one before I leave....... Is that a music store?

Bayou: The old music store? Ye.....you play an instrument?

Cirrina: I play the cello .... It's nothing impressive really..... Second chair trying to get first chair in high school

Bayou: wow I'd like to see you play

Cirrina: no...nooo I-I couldn't .... You were going to take me to the cafe

Bayou: come on... Let's go inside....... We have plenty of time

Cirrina: ehhhhhh ok..... ...

Bayou: excuse me do you have a Cello we can try out?

Employees: sure.....hol up...let meh jest.......unlock.....here ya are..... .

Bayou: here you go Cirrina

Cirrina: [playing Bach: Cello Suite No. 1]

Bayou: [clap]...[clap] ...wow brains and beauty

Cirrina: (blush)..........you don't mean that

Bayou: I do .... You really talented

Cirrina: hehehe.............

Bayou:................

Cirrina: It's getting dark. I need to go home.

Bayou: Yeah why don't I take you to the cafe and get something to go and I can walk you to the ferry....{takes hand}

Cirrina: I'd like that.

_______________________________________________

Candi: mmmmmmm.....*yawn*........*huff*........(Squeak).....hm?

Plushie

Recording: I believe in you and your strength to keep fighting

Candi: Demersal?....... Do they still give these out?.....(Squeeze)

Recording: sometimes bad things happen and they're out of our control. It wasn't your fault

Candi: Cod I hated this thing ........ alright where are my kids? .... I'm well rested and ready to go........hey Neta..(toss)...

Neta:...ow......... hey........(Pat).......(Pat)......(Pat)

Bowie: *sleeping*..........

Candi: thanks for watching the kids. Donn had to go back to work today...*yawn*...... just needed a break..

Neta: no problem

Candi: how's Ona doing?

Ona:*sleeping*.......

Neta: she's fine......

Candi: .. That's good.. .... why do you still have this thing?

Neta: it was a gift... I got it when I was a kid...I just can't give it away

Candi:............

Neta: What! Ok what did you do with yours?

Candi: I ripped out the voice box and gave it to Bowie. He then threw up on it so I threw it away. Kids...

Neta: yeah... I had an old blanket I used to wrap her in. One blowout later and it was in the trash

Candi: hehehehe... Don't you just love being a parent sometimes?

Neta: heheheh.... Don't tell her I told you that she would kill me.. hehehdhe

Mahi:.......guys

Candi: hi mahi..........

Mahi: hey

Candi: ....... Donn's outside I got to get going.... Neta do you mind?

Neta: *scooping up Bowie*....yeeep let's go.....

_______________________________________________

Cirrina: I really enjoyed this.. I had fun.

Bayou: I had fun too Cirrina. I really like you

Cirrina: I like you too ..........................

Bayou:...............

Cirrina:...........

Bayou:..........*leaning in*............[kiss].....

Cirrina: [kiss]........ Hehehe

Bayou: hehehehehe

Cirrina: (blush)..... I- I need to go....uh

Bayou: I'll text you.......[peck]

Cirrina: bye......

_______________________________________________

Neta: alright!! Drive safe!!!!.....*sigh*......... mahi go home.

Mahi: I just got here! And I'm not being annoying. Please can I stay just one more night please

Neta: No, I didn't sleep well last night and I just had to babysit two kids. Let me have my peace. You've been staying here for a week. You practically live here. I need to clean up, I need to do the dishes and vacuum the floor, laundry .. I need to clean out nibbles's box. I need to make this place look like I wasn't wallowing in my own loneliness. All right

Mahi: you can do that when I'm here. It's not going to bother you

Neta: mahi goooooo home.....

Mahi: please can I say one more night please? I won't complain about the couch

Neta: no..... good bye

Mahi: but my apartment is quiet. You complain about wallowing in your loneliness. What about me you don't think I'm wallowing

Neta: get a pet or something ... (SLAM)

Mahi: (bang).....(bang)...... Where do I get a pet

Neta:AAAAAAAAAHHHH........*sigh*.. . . You can stay. This is your last night here. Tomorrow I will take you to the pet store after work pick out whatever you want and leave me alone..

Mahi: thanks Neta!

_______________________________________________

@fish-at-fish-fish-resort mahi go home

[wiitzend]

there’s not a single platonic explanation for joey deciding to give phoebe “the perfect kiss” after she laments about never getting one before her 31st birthday and it’s going to haunt me for the rest of my life. that was the kiss of a man in love.

[norrizzandpia]

My Name (LN4)

Summary: Y/n and Lando have a painful past together. When they go their separate ways and are left to pick up the pieces, Lando realizes he can no longer hear the woman he loved’s name without feeling deeply ashamed.

Warnings: this is the most angsty thing i ever written. TOXIC!LANDO TO THE MAX, lots of language, insinuations to sex, this is absolutely horrific i am so sorry its very painful and sad NO HAPPY ENDING (word count is a little over 4k)

Do you feel ashamed when you hear my name?

Some people had chapters they could never bring themselves to read out loud. Lando’s painfully silent chapter was Y/n. His nights were swallowed whole by the looks on her face when he let her down once more, the moment when she first thought he didn’t care about her in the way she did. Y/n was a recurring nightmare and a sobering remembrance for him.

FIVE YEARS PRIOR

“Lando, I have someone I want you to meet.” Max murmured to him as they glided through the crowd of rich sponsors. His best friend giggled under his breath as the groups separated like a sea, revealing the most beautiful woman.

From the moment he saw her, Lando knew he had to have her, “Please tell me it’s her.”

Max shook his head, his body lighting up as Y/n smiled at him and hugged him tightly. The two turned to the racer, still grinning, “This is Y/n. Friend from London.”

Lando thought she was perfect, down to the teeth peeking behind her upturned lips. His hand extended out for her hand, “It’s nice to meet you.”

”You as well.” Her voice was sultry, soft. Her hand fit right in the palm of his. Her body drawn to him, his to hers. Lando wanted her in his bed yesterday.

Sensing some sort of tension, knowing it was sexual, Max slid from the grasp of Y/n. He clipped his head down as a form of goodbye before leaving the two to turn from strangers to friends, maybe more in store.

The beginning of Lando’s favorite part of his life and the downfall of whoever he was before he met her.

TWO MONTHS LATER

Whether it was because of her overwhelming, albeit attractive, confidence or the fact that she was Max’s friend, Lando didn’t ask Y/n out right away. Instead, he tiptoed around her, so did she, but he only stopped when picturing her all the time got to be boring. She only stopped when he showed up at her door with flowers, ready for their date.

“I love pink roses.” She smiled, lightly taking the bouquet from his hands and disappearing into her apartment.

He closed the door when he stepped in to follow her. His feet took him to her kitchen, where she leaned over the counter and filled a vase. His eyes bounced around the walls, peeking out into the living room to see heaps and blankets and pillows.

His hands in his pockets, “I hoped you would.”

She thought it was supposed to be a romantic gesture. Lando’s hands were touching the curve of her waist before he finished his sentence, his mouth next to her ear, “I’m glad you do.”

She made the mistake of turning around, part of her would later wonder if that was giving him the wrong idea.

Still, his lips met hers in a heated kiss, his body pushing hers further into the hard granite. She had been attracted to him from the start, gotten to know him over the two months he hadn’t actively tried to pursue her. She really liked him. That was the reasoning which led herself to being wrapped up in sheets with him a half hour later.

They never made it to that first date.

PRESENT

Lando’s eyes burned with all the flashing lights. Even after a race win, the joy could never subside the anxiety he got from all the press.

The first reporter, her name tag reading Clara, beamed at him. It reminded him of Y/n’s perfect teeth.

“Congratulations, Lando, on an incredible race! How are you feeling right now?” She spoke quickly. She pushed her microphone into his face.

His hands gripped the railing in front of him, “Amazing! This feeling will never get old.”

Her face dropped slightly as she glanced behind her, to the cameraman he presumed, “We would love to talk more about your stellar race, but we do want to ask for your thoughts on the allegations surrounding Y/n Y/l/n over hostile workplace behavior.”

His heart squeezed. He wished people knew her. Not the girl he ruined, but the woman he knew she still was deep down, past all the things that happened between them. His cheeks flushed, “Y/n is an amazing person. She has a kind heart. I just hope people can see that.”

He prayed that Clara would drop the subject. Lando would kill to clear Y/n’s name for her, maybe that would makeup for all the pain he caused, but she would never give him the light of day, even for that. People associated him with her and it tore at his insides. There wasn’t a day that went by that the taste of her name in his mouth didn’t feel like a type of betrayal.

Clara’s eyebrows moved up, “So, you think the allegations are false?”

He huffed, “I’m not speaking about the allegations. I’m simply speaking about the woman I knew.”

Whoever she was now, he didn’t know enough to comment.

FOUR YEARS PRIOR

“That was great.” Lando breathed, his chest rising and falling quickly from beside her.

She laughed, “Happy for you.”

His body turned to the side, his head propped up by his arm, “It was nice having you here.”

She was quiet for a moment, trying to decipher what that sentence implied. She thought she knew, she just didn’t want to face it.

Y/n’s hand traced his arm, “It was a good time.”

Lando pulled away from her, slipping from bed and pulling his pants back on. Loud and clear, she thought.

Still, she tried. Pathetically. Her shirt slid over her body as she grumbled, “Do you wanna go get some food?”

From her view of his back, she saw him tense, “Uh, I can’t, Y/n. Sorry. I’m super busy right now.”

She sighed softly, too quiet for him to hear. He turned around, fully dressed now. She stood, shirt and underwear on with no towel to clean herself. Completely rejected. A small piece of her heart chipped away.

She nodded, “Okay, yeah, no problem. I get it.”

He rushed out of the room, “Yeah, thanks! Feel free to let yourself out! I’ve got some errands to run!”

The door slammed shut immediately after. She took a moment in the silence to gather her messy mind. Maybe he was genuinely busy. Maybe he didn’t mean it that way. He said it was nice having her there.

He couldn’t have meant this in a mean way.

Like any girl in love with someone they thought they were too unworthy of having, the excuses began.

ONE MONTH LATER

Deja Vu flooded Y/n’s senses as Lando rolled off her body. The sinking feeling that her time with him was over mixed with the familiarity and it proved to be a horrific experience.

Her hand reached out to grab her pants that had been discarded on the floor when his voice rang out.

“Do you wanna go get food?” He asked, head turning to look at her as if it was the most regular thing.

Her hand stopped just above her jeans, “What?”

Lando sat up from bed, no longer in a rush to throw his clothes on, “Do you want to go get food with me?”

Some place within herself ridiculed her for nodding her head so eagerly. It was beginning to feel like she was trying to earn his love.

His hand around her waist moved to link in her palm and she finally felt like something to him. When he sat across from her at the quiet and secluded diner they found five minutes after leaving his apartment, his eyes bore into hers. He studied her like a thing he loved.

Maybe he finally did.

PRESENT

When Lando closed the door to Max’s apartment, he was met with hushed and frantic whispers. He walked slowly down the hall toward his best friend’s voice, clearly in distress.

“Y/n, I don’t understand that can’t be true. You’re not that person.” He gave, hand clutching his phone.

Lando heard murmurs on the other line before Max was cutting her off, “No, I don’t care how much you’ve changed over the years. I know you and I know you aren’t the person these people are saying you are. You wouldn’t scream at people because they got your coffee order wrong. You wouldn’t fire people over one small mistake. You wouldn’t humiliate others publicly to make some sort of statement. You just aren’t that person.”

More murmurs before Max’s interruption, “No! I know you know ‘this is how you run a business’ is such a bullshit excuse. If this is you, then please let me know where Y/n is because I know for fucks sake this isn’t it.”

The responses on the other line jumped in volume, Lando being able to make out some of the words. Y/n was yelling, truly yelling. Telling Max that he wasn’t a good friend, not supporting her through whatever was being alleged.

Lando’s ears rang. This wasn’t her, he knew that. Everybody knew that. She was a bright spirit, she wasn’t now. She was a hollowed out version of who she used to be and Lando knew he had taken every bit of it. He held what she once was in his hands and this was her trying to move on without it.

He wanted to give it back to her somehow, revive the life she once led, but he was so ashamed to show his face to her. He knew it would only be met with an anger he wouldn’t be able to forget.

He couldn’t hear anymore of her turmoil. Too many memories were being brought to the forefront of his mind. Maybe it was selfish, he had proven to be on many occasions, but he stepped into the room.

“Lando’s here. I have to go.” Max rushed.

The line clipped before he could even get his full sentence out.

Max stared at his phone for a moment, studying the contact picture he hadn’t changed for years. Standing off to the side, Lando could make out Y/n’s smile, her perfect teeth, and lightness in her eyes. It was a living testimony of someone that was no longer there. Someone who had lost themselves in it all. He knew it because he had gone through it. In the midst of Y/n, Lando had lost sight of himself. Part of him wanted to blame his behavior toward her on that, but there was no excuse. He had to live with the knowledge he was capable of causing such psychological damage on someone else. Someone he loved. A personal, endless hell.

Max sighed, “Hey, mate.”

It was quiet, exhausted and Lando knew Max didn’t want to talk about it, but something in him urged to hear, “That was her?”

Max nodded, “Uh, yeah. She’s just trying to fight the allegations right now.”

Lando set the takeout down on the desk, “I assume it’s not going well?”

Something switched in Max, his eyes turned cold, “No, Lando, it’s not going well. And, frankly, I don’t know why you’re even going here with me right now”

Lando put his hands on his hips with his eyebrows furrowed, “Going where with you?”

Max’s fists curled, “I forgave you for the way you treated her, but that doesn’t mean it’s not a sore spot. She’s lashing out at people, ruining her reputation, because you put her through a shit show. I’m not saying this is wholly your fault, but you had such a major fucking role in it and, to be honest, sometimes I can’t fucking look at you without seeing her and everything she has to go through on top of all the shit you did. You don't have the right, in my mind, to ask me about her.”

”I’m not trying to start anything. I still care about her.” Lando said, hands turning upwards as if he was lost.

Max scoffed, “Care about her? Fuck you! Care about her, my ass. You used her, Lando! You took and then you gave, you took and then you gave. Such a twisted cycle that she never even asked for, looked for, deserved. You have no right to sit here and say you care about her. I care about her.”

The two friends had had such a hard time finding a peaceful ground in the moments after Y/n and Lando’s blow up. Max was protective over her. He entrusted Lando with her and Lando had thrown her back in his face like she wasn’t someone to be cherished. Part of him would never forgive Lando for that.

They wondered if that would be the final straw.

Lando breathed out, “I think you need some space. I’ll leave and if you want to talk things out later, call me. I don’t want to push something with you that you don’t want anymore.”

He turned around, prepared to walk out, but Max whispered, “Like you did with Y/n?”

The McLaren Driver spun around, “What?”

Max’s arms crossed in front of his chest, “You heard me.”

The fire in Max’s eyes masked pain, Lando knew that because he had lived it. Max didn’t want to fight him, he wanted this battle to be over. In a moment of growth, Lando set aside the anger in his own head and walked out the door. Hoping for a day where Max could look at him and see something other than the one moment in his life where he ruined something so perfectly his.

TWO YEARS PRIOR

Lando had DNF’d. Max and Y/n watched on as he took his gloves off, forcefully throwing them to the ground in frustration. A worker coaxed him into the car waiting to take him back to the garage, Lando shrugging him off and throwing himself into the backseat.

Andrea’s fist collided with the table he was sitting in front of and Jon ripped his headset off. Lando had been so close to securing a win, but one wrong swerve and he had gone spinning off the track with no opportunity of recovery.

Lando’s return was quick, his body storming through the room and darting up the stairs to privacy. Y/n and Max just glanced at each other, both knowing how he got with these things. Part of her wanted to go up there, hug him and tell him how amazing he was, but she also knew he needed time to be alone. Process things. She just wanted the best for him.

Her phone vibrated in her pocket.

Lan <3

Come up to my room?

She smiled. Lando hadn’t opened up to her that much over the year and a half they had been fooling around, whatever you wanted to call it, but she had always wanted him to. She had tried to ask him about family life, stressors he was dealing with, and he would answer, but it was brief and then his lips were on hers again.

Maybe he had finally come around to letting her in like she had him.

Y/n Y/l/n

Coming xx

When she got to his room, her knuckle hit the door once before it was flying open and he was pulling her in. She laughed as he kissed her, thinking it was meaningless. But, when his hands tried to pull her shirt off, she pulled back.

She cocked her head, “What’re you doing?”

Lando stopped, “Fucking you?”

Her heart dipped down, “What?”

He looked at her like nothing was wrong. Did this mean nothing to him?

”Lando, don’t you wanna talk about what just happened?” She tried, but he just kept playing with the hem of her clothes.

He nodded and her confusion almost subsided. Almost, “Yeah, with some kisses and an orgasm.”

His lips met her neck and a slimy feeling washed over her body. The first time she felt self-hatred in the presence of him. What was she doing?

Y/n pushed him off, “No, I don’t want to have sex right now, Lan.”

His hip popped out and he stared at her, “Why?”

She shrugged, “Because I don’t. That should be enough.”

He looked at her as if he expected sex. Like her rejection was some sort of betrayal. He didn’t just appreciate being with her?

Lando groaned, “Ugh, whatever. Okay. I have to get changed so I can go to the debrief.”

For once, she didn’t try to argue to stay. Something didn’t feel right about his hands on her anymore.

Something wasn’t kind about their situation anymore and it wasn’t the love she knew she had for him.

THREE MONTHS LATER

Y/n Y/l/n

Can I come over? We need to talk.

Lan <3

Sure

She walked into his apartment with hesitation. What she had identified as a comfortable space no longer felt that way. Now, she stood in the foyer as if she didn’t know the layout like the back of her hand.

Lando looked at her expectantly. It mirrored the way he had eyed her that afternoon in his driver’s room. She hated it.

“We need to talk about what we are.”

Lando’s eyes bulged, “Why? There’s nothing to talk about. We both know what we are.”

Y/n shook her head, “Well, I don’t. I thought I did, but I’m starting to think I’ve been a little naive.”

Naive? That was not a word Lando would choose to describe Y/n. Gullible, maybe, but naive? No. She wasn’t that.

He led her to the living room, hand falling around her waist and lips pecking her neck out of habit when they fell onto the couch. She pulled away, “Stop, Lando.”

The softness in her voice, the way it sounded broken down, made him search her face for answers.

He got them when she began speaking, “Lando, for the past year and a half, I have done everything a girlfriend would do. I have cooked for you, run out to complete errands so you weren’t stressed, come to your house at night when you couldn’t sleep, stopped seeing other men because I felt tied to you exclusively, loved you. You have done none of that. I’ve gotten flowers, but that’s rare and I’ve gotten gifts, but it’s been for my birthday and weeks late. I give you everything I have. I give you my time, my energy, my body, my feelings, everything. You’ve given me on and off moments where you treat me with some level of respect, but I have never gotten the amount I deserve. I can’t keep doing this when all I feel like is a random fling.”

Lando stuttered. He knew this was coming. He knew the way he had been treating her, giving her things occasionally so they would hold more value and pulling back when he felt like it, would catch up to him. But, to think she was in love with him and expected the same from him, was not something he was prepared for. He was speechless as he looked at her. What was he supposed to say? She was a fling.

The moment that would haunt him everywhere he went: the small drop in her face when she realized he wasn’t fighting her. The knowledge that what she had felt all along was what she had been.

She deserved more.

She stood from the couch, “Oh my god.”

Lando stood with her, “Y/n, I am so sorry. I-”

She slapped him across the face, “Who do you think you are? Giving me flowers, taking me out to dinner, giving me a taste of what it’s like to be treated with dignity by you just so you could keep stringing me along. You manipulative piece of shit!”

The anger in her eyes mirrored Max’s whenever he got mad. He worried that would be burned into his brain every time he looked his best friend’s way.

Lando grabbed her wrist when she turned around, spinning her back, “Y/n, you have no idea. I didn’t mean for it to be this way. I’ve always wanted you. I want you.”

She pushed him away, “Want me how? Want me for my body? Want me for sex? Want me for some fucking orgasms? Is that what you’ve reduced me to?”

He tried to find the right words. There were none. “I thought we were having fun! I didn’t know you were falling for me.”

She rushed into the kitchen, grabbing her purse while yelling, “What’d you think I was doing sticking around all this time? For the sex? You’re good in bed, but not that fucking good. You’re a sick fuck.”

She reached the door and he stood in front of it, forcing himself to memorize the fury that was slowly fading away to deep sadness, “Y/n, I care about you. I don’t know how I feel about you, but I know it’s more than a fling.”

Lando waited for her reply, but she just smacked his shoulder and began to cry, “Don’t say that! That’s so fucking unfair! I’ve been in love with you for a year and you don’t even have your feelings figured out for me? You’ve been fucking me for almost two years and you have no clue if you hate me or you love me? Grow up!”

Her tears bled through the fabric of her shirt as she stared up at him. The deep color of her eyes was magnified by the glossiness. He loved her eyes. Did that mean he loved her? He was furiously trying to sort out the feelings he knew he had for her in the short amount of time he had. He didn’t want her to leave. Was that cruel?

In his silence, she found everything she needed. Pushing past him, Y/n ripped the door open. Her face turned back to him, a version he didn’t recognize, and she whispered, “You should be ashamed of yourself.”

Her parting words struck his soul, so raw and real. He knew that was what she wanted him to remember if he chose to block the entire conversation from his mind.

No matter how hard he would try, Lando would come to find he would never be able to forget the blip in his life. Her fast pulse under his fingers when he grabbed her wrist to the way she condemned him, it was all there. Lingering and plotting to remind him of their presence when the syllables of her name were uttered.

Maybe he did love her, he was starting to realize that, but that would never matter now.

”You should be ashamed of yourself.”

PRESENT

Lando moved the oatmeal around in his bowl as he scrolled through his Instagram feed. His TV played some random news station in the background in the living room, one he was half listening to. But, the moment the anchor spoke her name, Lando was dropping his phone and bringing his full attention to the screen.

A picture of her popped up, a headline below and one Lando couldn’t bring himself to read. He was too enthralled with her picture, remembering the times she used to smile at him that way.

”Y/n Y/l/n has officially stepped down from her CEO position at her famous boutique. She and her team released a statement this morning, apologizing for the strain she put on employees and other board members these past two years. She explains in the statement that there is no excuse for her actions, but she is heavily remorseful for them. She promises to work further on herself out of respect for the people she affected, changing her ways. She also briefly mentioned in the statement that she will be paying thousands of dollars to each employee she fired under wrongful termination. Y/n explains that the business has always meant the world to her and it is painful to let it go, put it in the hands of someone else, but she knows this is for the best. She wishes the business and all employees a more positive life after having impacted their’s negatively for so long.”

Lando stood in his living room, hands by his sides, as he read the screenshot posted on the TV. His hands shook and his palms sweat, tears pricking his eyes.

She loved that job.

This was his fault, no matter how much he tried to say her actions were under her control. It hit him fully then and there. Y/n changed him for the better, taught him how to treat someone you love, and he ruined her. He took the perfect girl with the perfect teeth, perfect hair, beautiful smile, and twisted her insides into someone who lived with rage. She never knew rage until him. He introduced it to her.

Do you feel ashamed when you hear my name?

A/N: sorry pookies sending all my love after this bc it broke ME idk how yall are doing

TAGS: @jehun

[imiwrites]

Moon Song

Sirius Black x Fem!Reader

So I'll wait for the next time you want me

Like a dog with a bird at your door

Sypnosis: Sirius was the best boyfriend you could've asked for. Until he wasn't.

WC: 5.0k (it's a pretty long one but it's worth it i swear)

Warnings: ANGSTY, cheating, second chances, toxic relationships, use of Y/N,

A/N: i was listening to Phoebe Bridgers then this idea struck. Orginally inspired by Georgia and then I realised it was more Moon Song vibes. Enjoyyy.

masterlist

Sirius Black is the best boyfriend you could ever ask for. Handsome, chivalrous, funny. The list was endless. You couldn’t even name a single bad trait he had. 

You love him, of course. Endlessly. More than words could describe. 

I’m going to marry this man, was a thought that was constantly in your mind, bringing a grin to your face every time. 

It pops in your head when he holds your hand walking down the halls, or when he kisses you senseless, or when he hugs you so tight, that you truly believe your body has never felt safer. 

So yes, it was safe to say that Sirius Black was the best boyfriend you could ask for. 

»↠ ≈☆≈ ↞« 

“Well good morning to you.” Sirius grins up at you, lying on the couch in the common room. 

You had just woken up. You are not a morning person. You yawn, rubbing your eyes in an attempt to make you more alert. 

“Mornin’.” You lazily smile back at him. 

Sirius sat up on the couch, patting the space next to him. “Come sit, love.”

You smile at him gratefully, leaning your head against the solidness of his chest. 

“Much better.” You say softly, smiling up at him. 

Best boyfriend ever. 

“I’m going out tonight. With James. Ravenclaw’s throwing a party. I know they aren’t really your thing, but you know I would love it if you wanted to come with me.” Sirius whispers into your hair.

You hum, giving it thought.

“You’re right. Not really my scene. But, as a compromise, I’ll wait up in the common room ‘til you come back.” 

Sirius frowns at that. 

“Don’t wanna keep you up, love. It’s fine if you just go to bed, y’know. I’m a big boy, I can take care of myself.” You laugh softly, the sensation tickling Sirius’ neck.

“I’m not waiting up because I don’t think you can take care of myself. I’m waiting up because I like seeing you. And, besides, you are really funny when you’re drunk.”

Sirius snorts, but nods his head in agreement.

“Alright, love. I’ll come back early for you, don’t worry.”

»↠ ≈☆≈ ↞«

“I love him,” you gush, resting your head in Lily’s lap, your eyes heavy.

She smiled lopsidedly at you, her fingers twisting through your hair, plaiting small braids in your hair. 

“Really?” she says, a sarcastic tone to her voice, “You don’t say.” You lightly tap her arm, ignoring her mocking. “Haha. Very funny, Lils. Don’t tell me you don’t act the same with James.”

That gets a reaction out of her, making her pale cheeks a soft red.

“I’m just saying,” she shrugs, looking away in embarrassment, her hands continuing to braid your hair. 

James had come back an hour earlier, and you’d stuck to your promise to Sirius that the pair of you had made earlier. Lily, being the fiercely loyal friend she is, insisted on waiting up with you. 

The common room door opened, and you could hear Sirius voice, albeit slurred, echoing through the space. 

Your face light up, and you immediately sat up from Lily’s lap, getting ready to see your boyfriend. 

That was, until you heard another voice with him. A female voice.

Confused, you took a step forward, trying to determine who Sirius was with. 

A girl. A girl, whose arm was wrapped around Sirius’ own. They were laughing, and she was getting really close to him, being insanely touchy with him. You could’ve sworn you heard the shatter of your heart, then and there.

“Sirius?” you whisper, eyes filling with tears. 

He didn’t notice you properly at first, too occupied with the girl who was quite literally hanging off him. But when he saw you, he looked guilty.

Your perfect boyfriend, the one who saw every side of you, the one who could lighten your mood with just a smile, the one who could do no wrong. 

Yet, here he was, with another girl.

“Y/N, I-” he starts. His words are thick, and you can smell the stench of firewhisky, despite the distance between you two. 

“Save it.” you whisper, turning your back on him, hurriedly rushing up the stairs so he wouldn’t see the tears in you eyes. 

“Lily, you know I would never do something like this. I-I swear.” Sirius spoke slowly, tentatively watching Lily.

“You should tell that to her, not me.” Lily spoke, harshly calm. “But it’s not looking good Sirius. You know that.”

And with that, she walked away, leaving Sirius Black stranded in the common room. 

»↠ ≈☆≈ ↞« 

The next morning was, unsurprisingly, met with a flurry of apologies from Sirius. Usually, your heart would melt at the sight of him begging for your forgiveness. Hell, you would’ve found it romantic if you weren’t thinking about what he was apologising for. But instead, you let Lily lead you away. 

Your red nose and tired eyes did not escape Sirius’ view, and it made him feel terrible. He didn’t mean it, he knew he didn’t. You weren’t at the party, so, in typically Sirius nature, he went to the first girl that held an even slight resemblance to you. He wouldn’t have made a move on her, he had thought, but his recollection of the night was hazy. 

He wouldn’t have made a move on her, would he? You were too important to him. He could never…

God, he fucked up big time.

»↠ ≈☆≈ ↞«

It seemed the universe knew about his fuck up, too. He couldn’t get you alone at all. He needed to see you. This past day had been pure torture for him, all he could think about was apologizing to you. 

“She’ll come around, don’t worry, Padfoot,” James says, trying to comfort the boy. 

“But what if she doesn’t, James! Don’t you get it? I fucked up. Majorly. God, I don’t think she’s gonna come around. She deserves so much more than someone who’d cheat on her the minute she’s not there.” He pauses, taking in a breath. “I was awful, Prongs. I don’t think she’s gonna come around.”

James looks at him sympathetically, but he was at a complete loss for words. 

“Apologise to her, Sirius.” Remus speaks up softly, “If you think she deserves better, become the better she deserves. Y/N isn’t someone who would give up on love so easily. She may resent you for a while, but I’m sure, if you properly explain what happened, and give her a well-deserved apology, that she may be willing to start fresh.”

Sirius stops pacing, staring at Remus.

“Y’know, Moony, you might just be right! I fucked up one time, I’ve just gotta put it behind us and apologise. Then it should be alright again!” 

For the first time that day, Sirius was grinning. 

»↠ ≈☆≈ ↞«

You took a shaky breath, staring at yourself in the mirror. Your face wasn’t red anymore, though your eyes were still a bit swollen from the crying. You shook your head, looking away from the mirror, and moving towards your bed. Falling down gracelessly, you stuff your face in your pillow, letting out a silenced scream. 

You aren’t sure how long you lie like that. It wasn’t until a knock on your door made you jump. 

“Y/N, please. I-I know you don’t want to speak to me, and I know I should give you some space, but at least let me give you something.” Sirius calls out from your door.

You hesitate. You badly want to let him in, run into his arms and just stay there. You also want to scream at him, hurt him the same way he hurt you. But most of all, you don’t want to see him.

“Love, I promise I won’t bother you until you’re ready.” When he doesn’t get a response, he lets out a defeated sigh. “I’ll leave now. I’ve got something for you, I’ll just leave it at your door. I’m here when you’re ready.”

You don’t move until you hear the gradual fade of his footsteps. Cautiously, you open the door. A basket lay on the wooden floors, filled with chocolates and sweets of all kind. Next to it, was a bouquet of flowers tied neatly by a ribbon. You pick the things up, placing the basket on your bed, and grabbing a vase for the flowers. 

As you take a seat on your bed, you notice a letter tucked inside the basket. You pause. Do you really want to read it? You weren’t sure. Biting your lip anxiously, you carefully unfold it. 

“My love, 

Words cannot express how sorry I am. I could fill this whole note with apologies to you, and I still wouldn’t be done. But you already know that, and apologies aren’t going to fix this. I understand that now. 

I know you’re hurting. I’m hurting to, just thinking about how you feel. It was an honest mistake, whether you want to take my word for it or not. I truly don’t know why I did it. It was a horrible thing for me to do, and I wouldn’t be shocked if I lost you forever because of it. I sincerely hope I don’t. I love you too much for that to happen.

I suppose I was missing you. I know you don’t go to these parties, and that is always alright with me, but I guess it would’ve been nice to have you there with me for once. Not that you have to, you know. I suppose I just wanted to be held by you, and this girl just looked so much like you, I guess I didn’t realise it wasn’t you until it was too late. 

This did not happen because I’m not happy with you. In fact, you’ve made my life ultimately better by just existing. And I know you are upset with me right now, but please, Y/N, I want us to be okay. 

Talk to me when you’re ready.

Yours,

Sirius Black.”

You stare at the letter, frozen, unsure what to do. Sirius was your boyfriend, after all. It would be awful of you if you weren’t to forgive him, especially after the heartfelt gift he’d just given to you.

But… he did cheat on you. Regardless, he cheated. 

He wouldn’t do it again, you think, he was just drunk and missing me. He would never do this on purpose.

Your eyes flicked to the photo of you too sitting on your bedside table. It was taken in winter, and you two were standing in the snow in Hogsmeade. He had his arms wrapped around you firmly, and you were looking up at him, laughing. 

You had to give him another chance. You couldn’t just give it all up.

»↠ ≈☆≈ ↞«

“Sirius…” Your voice makes him jump. He wasn’t expecting a response from you so soon.

“Y/N.” He copies, giving her a nervous smile.

“You wouldn’t do it again, would you?” You ask, eyes on the ground, not looking at him.

Sirius stands up from his spot on the couch, tilting your chin up to look at him.

“Never, love. I swear.” 

He had an honest look on his face, and you trusted him fully.

You smiled, and he echoed it right back at you. 

“We’ll be okay, love. We always will.” He whispers to you, his lips close to your ear, making you shiver.

“I know. I don’t doubt it for a second.” You grin at him, before pulling him down into a much-needed kiss. 

»↠ ≈☆≈ ↞«

Things with Sirius were almost completely back to normal. You put his mistakes in the past, focusing purely on the present. 

At least, that’s how it was for most of the time. Sometimes at night, you lie awake, wondering how he could’ve done something like this to you. He swore he would never do something like this again. But you were sure he didn’t think he would do something like this in the first place. 

Regardless, you put on a happy face, and try to make things go back to the way they were before. 

Sirius is acting different, however. He is almost more charming. It was obvious to you that he’s trying to make up for his mistakes, but you believe that it would be better to just forget it ever happened. That way, you can change your thinking, gaslighting yourself into thinking it didn’t happen at all. 

You found that was the easiest way to deal with the pain. You would never admit to Sirius just how much this had effected you. He already felt awful, and he’d apologised for it, right? So there was nothing to worry about. 

You sigh, trying your hardest to focus your attention back on the book in front of you. Studying in the quiet of the library usually put yourself at ease, but it seems to be no use now. Your mind is travelling a million miles per hour, and there’s nothing you could do to slow the thoughts down.

“Y/N, hi.” Remus smiles, sliding into the vacant seat next to you, bringing out his books and placing them gently on the desk.

“Hey Remus, what subject?” You ask, gesturing to the books he’d just placed down. 

“Potions. Figured I get a headstart on the new assignment Slughorn has given us. You?”

“Astronomy. Professor Sinstra has been giving me a headache about N.E.W.T.S, so I thought I should study for my test.” You shrug, looking at the sprawl of open books. 

“And how’s that going for you?” Remus chuckles lightly, glancing down at the empty page of your notebook. 

You groan, laying your head down on the desk. “Not very well. Can’t focus properly.”

Remus smiles slightly in understanding. “Penny for your thoughts?”

You sigh. Do you really want to burden Remus with this, too? Sirius is his best friend.

Remus notices your hesitation, and looks at you worriedly. “You don’t have to if you don’t want to. Just might be nice not to have to worry on your own.” 

“How d’you know I’m worrying?” You question.

He tilts his head. “Y/N, we’ve been friends for a long time. It isn’t that hard to tell when you aren’t feeling okay.”

You sigh again, lifting your head up from the desk. “Dunno, it’s stupid.”

Remus shakes his head. “It’s not stupid if you don’t think it’s stupid.”

You pause, biting your lip. “I just- it’s stupid, really. Just overthinking. Y’know, with the whole Sirius thing. I just want everything to go back to normal, but whenever he’s with me, it’s like he’s walking on eggshells.”

Remus frowns. “It’s not stupid, Y/N. You’re scared. Have you talked to Sirius about this?”

You shake your head, eyes wide. “No, and you must not say a word about this to him, either. I don’t want to make it worse. He already feels awful about it.”

“But it’s stressing you out, Y/N! And this is Sirius we’re talking about. He’s understanding, he won’t be upset if you bring this up. To be honest, I think it might make him feel better.”

“You think?” You ask, furrowing your eyebrows as Remus nods. 

“You two are so in sync, you just need to get over this rough patch. Talk it out with him, and if it makes things worse than you can blame me.” Remus smiles. 

You nod your head slowly, uncertain, but you would trust Remus with your life. You know he’s being honest with you. Gathering your belongings, you stand up. “Thanks, Remus.” “Anytime, Y/N, you know that.”

»↠ ≈☆≈ ↞«

Remus was right, as per usual. Sirius and you had talked it out, and your relationship was finally back to normal. Months had passed since the incident, and there was nothing that had happened that made you doubt your love for him. 

“Morning, dove.” Sirius smiles at you, placing a chaste kiss to your cheek, before taking a seat next to you at the breakfast table. 

“Morning, Siri.” You grin at him, leaning into his side a little as you ate. 

It was a Saturday morning, and the hours had gone by slowly. For once, you’d waken up earlier than Sirius, choosing to head down and get an early breakfast before everyone else woke up and stole your favourite foods. 

“You’re up early. Any reason as to why?” Sirius asks, leaning forward to put some food on his plate. 

You shake your head at his question. “No, just woke up early today. Sorry I didn’t wait for you, I really wanted to go down and eat. Such a wider variety when you don’t wake up late.”

“It’s ok, Y/N, you know I don’t mind. I just hate the thought of you eating alone.” 

You laugh and shake your head. “I didn’t eat alone, silly. Remus was with me.” 

For the first time since Sirius sat down, he looked away from you and across the table, and there sat Remus. The boy gave him a smile, but Sirius didn’t return it. That confused you, the pair were really close friends. 

“Right.” Sirius murmurs, choosing to play with his food instead of looking at either of you. He almost looked… angry. But that wouldn’t be right, would it? Sirius never got angry. 

“Well, I’ve gotta go study some more. I’ll see you two later, yeah?” Remus says, getting up from his seat. 

“Yeah, yeah, see you later.” Sirius grumbles, still not looking up. You shoot him a confused look, before smiling up at Remus. 

“See you later, Rem. Enjoy your study!” You waved him off, watching him walk away.

“So, Rem, huh?” Sirius blurts out, finally meeting your eyes. 

You tilt your head, “Come on, Sirius. Don’t be like that. We’ve been friends forever, you know that.” 

“So you’d rather have breakfast with him then me?” You were slightly anxious. Sirius had never shown anger towards you. Sure, you’d seen him angry, but he never pointed his anger towards you. 

“It wasn’t planned. I woke up, and went down here, and Remus was already sitting down, reading a book. You know I love eating breakfast with you. Don’t be sour, love.” You put your hand on his shoulder, and lean in to kiss his cheek, but he moves away, brushing your hand off as he does so. 

“If you love it so much, why didn’t you wait for me, hmm? Instead, you decide to go gallivanting around with one of my best mates! For all I know, you could be cheating on me!” His voice is raised, and you flinch away.

“Last time I checked, it was you who cheated on me!” You say, the anger getting to you as tears prickle your eyes. God, not now. “You really think I would stoop that low, Sirius? Why would I even cheat on you! Remus and I are friends, you know that, he knows that, everyone knows that! So don’t you dare accuse me of cheating on you, Sirius Black!”

You slammed your cutlery down on your plate, getting up and leaving. 

»↠ ≈☆≈ ↞«

You didn’t speak to Sirius for the rest of the day. And it seems that he had the same plan as you, the both of you avoiding each other at all costs. You stayed in your dorm, not leaving once. 

“Y/N… are you okay?” Lily asks as she walks into the dorm, sitting down next you on your bed.

“‘m fine.” You grumble, not looking her in the eye.

“I heard the two of you, down at breakfast. What happened?”

“Sirius thought I was cheating on him with Remus,” you let out a humourless laugh, “I was trying to calm him down, when he accused me of cheating on him. Just because I sat with Remus at breakfast.” 

Lily rubs your back sympathetically. “Are you okay, though?” 

You pause. In all the chaos that had ensured this morning, you truly didn’t think about how you felt. 

“I… I don’t know, Lils. It hurt, that he thought I would cheat on him. And I was mean. I brought up… you know. I know I shouldn’t have, but I couldn’t help it. I wasn’t thinking properly. I was just so angry.” 

Tears began to fall from your eyes, and Lily was quick to wipe them away with her thumb. 

“It’s okay, Y/N, you know, Sirius was probably tired, and you know how he gets. I don’t think he meant it.” Lily said pulling you into a hug. You rest your head on her shoulder, tears staining her shirt, but you know Lily wouldn’t be letting you go anytime soon. 

“He’s never been angry with me before. It scared me.”

“I know, Y/N/N, I know.” She pulled out of the embrace, “Maybe get some sleep, yeah? It might help you think clearer. I’ll have a talk with James, see if Sirius has said anything to him. It’ll be alright, Y/N, I know it will.”

You nod your head, curling in on yourself, silent tears streaming down your face as you fell asleep.

»↠ ≈☆≈ ↞«

The next day, you slugged down to breakfast. Late, this time. You don’t think you’d ever have an early breakfast again. 

“How are you feeling?” Lily asks softly as you take a seat next to her. 

“Okay.” You shrug. It wasn’t a lie. You weren’t feeling bad, and you certainly weren’t feeling good. You were somewhere in the middle.

“I talked to James last night.” Lily begins, and you look over at her. “Sirius had talked with James after it all happened. Apparently he was mad. But he was also upset. I think he knew that you wouldn’t do that to him, but the reminder that he did it got to him. James said that he wasn’t thinking straight. Apparently he’d gotten a letter from his mother that night.”

“Why wouldn’t he say anything to me?” You ask softly. Did he not trust you?

“I’m… I’m not too sure. Maybe just check in with him. Only if you want to, of course. If you want to break up with him and never see him again then I’m completely fine with that too.”

You let out a snort. 

“I’ll talk with him, I s’pose.” You smiled softly, and Lily leant her head on your shoulder. “You want to? I didn’t force you to, right?” 

“I want to. It was only a fight. Couples fight all the time.” 

»↠ ≈☆≈ ↞«

You knocked on the door of Sirius’ dorm room gently. 

“Who is it?” You hear Sirius call out. He doesn’t sound very good, and your heart breaks at the feeling of him being upset on his own.

“It’s me,” you say softly, “can I come in?”

You hear a shuffle behind the door, and after a minute or two, Sirius opens the door with a creak. He looks awful. There were dark bags underneath his puffy red eyes, and he looked like he hadn’t eaten. 

“You got a letter from your mother?” You ask tentatively. He looks confused, and he’s about to open his mouth when you answer his question. “James told me.”

“Ah.” He says, standing there awkwardly. He fiddles with his rings, and you let out a slow breath, staring down at his hands.

“I’m sorry, Sirius. I shouldn’t have snapped at you. It just felt… awful to be accused of something I didn’t do. I should never have brought up the past. We’d moved on from it, and I had to go and bring it up.” 

“I know you would never cheat on me, Y/N. I guess… I was just overwhelmed with my mother, and I got jealous over Remus. I’m not good at controlling my emotions.” He laughs humourlessly.

You look up at him slowly. “Why didn’t you tell me your mother wrote to you?” Your voice broke, and you could feel tears threatening to spill from your eyes. “I could’ve been there for you. I could’ve helped. You know I only ever want the best for you, Siri.”

He lets out a breath of his own. “I never want you to have to worry about me. I’ve always dealt with my family issues on my own, or with James. I never tell anyone else, and I didn’t want to burden you with it. They’re… a lot. And the letter, it wasn’t nice. I didn’t want you to get upset.”

“But I want to help you, Sirius. That’s what I’m here for. I’m your girlfriend, you can tell me everything. You don’t need to hide things from me.” You smile. 

He moved forward hugging you tightly. He rests his face in the crook of your neck, and you can feel his body relax in your arms. 

“Thank you, Y/N. I don’t deserve you. You’re too good to me.” He mumbles

»↠ ≈☆≈ ↞«

But it seemed that Sirius did feel the need to hide things from you. When you’d hang out together, sometimes he’d go quiet when you’d ask a question, or he would get defensive about something small. 

And he most certainly did not discuss the letter from his mother. 

You knew you shouldn’t push him, so you didn’t. You waited patiently for him to come to you and tell you what the letter was about. You waited weeks, and you didn’t hear another word on it. You even found out from James that he’d gotten another one, but he still didn’t bring that up. But you never pushed him. You continued to wait. 

It started to get worse, though. Sometimes, he’d disappear for the whole day. He’d cancel your plans. He’d sit with other people at dinner. He wouldn’t ask you to help him study.

You tried to believe that it was because of the letter from his mother. You truly did try, but you knew it wasn’t the case. There has to be something else. Someone else. 

You enter the library with a stack of books. You’d fallen a bit behind on your schoolwork due to your worries about Sirius. 

I’ll finish this and I’ll worry about Sirius later.

Turns out, you didn’t even have time to start your schoolwork before you had to think about Sirius and what he was doing. In fact, he was right in front of you, sitting with a Ravenclaw girl. She was undoubtedly pretty, you were fairly certain she was in the year below you. 

You try to keep your thoughts positive. Sirius was smart when he wants to be, maybe a professor finally realised that and gave him the tas of tutoring a student. You look at the table, not a single book in sight. You let out a shaky breath. They must be friends then. Though, Sirius had never mentioned being friends with a girl in Ravenclaw before. Maybe it was a new thing. 

Your positive thoughts ended pretty quickly, though, when you see Sirius lean in closer, smiling at her how he used to smile at you, then giving the girl a deep kiss. 

When was the last time he kissed you like that?

You stand there frozen, unsure of what to do. You can’t move. You want to look away, but your eyes refuse to leave their table. The girl pulls away, and Sirius has a grin on his face. Strange, how you hadn’t seen that smile in ages, but this girl gets it so easily. 

You can’t take it anymore. You’re books clutter to the floor, and the noise is enough to make the pair look over at you. The smile on Sirius’ face disappeared fast, and he’s standing up in an instant. 

“Y/N!” he calls, rushing over to you. But you certainly aren’t waiting around to hear his excuse. 

You run out of the library, the books discarded on the floor. Tears stream out of your eyes, and you hear him call out to you again. He’s nearing you, and looking around, there’s nowhere for you to run to. You’re well and truly cornered. 

“Y/N, please, I-I can make it up to you. I swear. I’ll be good for you.” Sirius looks heartbroken. 

How dare he, you think, how dare he look heartbroken when he did this to himself.

“How many times are you gonna say that until you mean it?” You ask, holding your head up high, trying to remain strong despite the tears that have fallen onto your cheeks. 

He stammers, but he can’t come up with a good answer. 

“You said you loved me, Sirius. How many times did you say that and lie? I have given you everything you could’ve asked for and more, but it’s not enough for you, is it?” You sniff, and inhale shakily, “It was never enough. I was never enough.” 

Sirius looks at you, but he can’t say anything. 

Can’t or won’t? a cruel part of you thinks. 

“Don’t talk to me again, Sirius Black. We’re done. I never want to see your face again.” 

You turn away, leaving Sirius stranded in the hallway. 

»↠ ≈☆≈ ↞«

Sirius Black was the best boyfriend you could ever ask for. 

But he was also the worst. 

Sure, he was handsome, chivalrous, funny.

But he was also cruel, bitter and a cheater.

You loved him, of course. Endlessly. More than words could describe. 

But love doesn’t always go both ways. 

You are reminded of that when he holds her hand walking down the halls, or when he kisses her senseless, or when he hugs her so tight, that she truly believes her body has never felt safer. 

So yes, it was safe to say that Sirius Black was the best boyfriend you could’ve ask for. 

But he was also the worst heartbreak you ever had to endure. 

[lucdacuslady]

hi this is my first fic!!! hopefully i’m able to write more :), please send suggestions you have :)

pov: you’ve been dating julien for a few years and accompanied the boys on the tour. you decide that tonight is a special night to pop the question

reader x julien baker fluff

you’re taking your usual spot side stage, a perfect view of your tattooed, some would call a rockstar girlfriend singing her little heart out on stage. on a usual night you are usually obnoxiously screaming every single lyric, and certainly being a spectacle, most fans posting your dance moves and utter love for the boys on twitter. but tonight feels different, your hands have never felt more clammy, and there’s a quiet sense to your extroverted demeanor. something that isn’t normal.

the boys have their last check backstage and the brunette comes up to you wrapping her tattooed hands around your waist. “hey angel, are you okay? you usually are fluttering around, i’ve barely heard a word out of you.” she says pressing a kiss against your temple you stare at lucy and phoebe, “sorry j, it’s nothing, i think i’m just exhausted and ready to be in our actual bed tonight” you say facing her. “ill be alright once the show starts, i’ll be waiting for you right here when you’re finished” you add kissing her.

“i love you baby” she says heading out to her spot on stage

“love you more jb!” you yell back

“see you out there kiddo” lucy says quietly giving your head a small kiss before joining your partner.

~flashback to two weeks prior~

“hey luce?” you say to the ravenette quietly as julien was taking a shower on the bus.

“yeah what’s up?” she says looking up from her book

“so i want to propose to julien, like big time propose and i want y’all involved because you all are all so close, i’ve spoken to her dad, i’ve talked to my parents. i could 1000% go on and on about how much i love your best friend and-”

lucy interrupts you “don’t say anything else, i have a perfect plan” she smiles so big at you.

~end of flashback~

half of the set is already completed, the solo album trio is coming up, with favor first. your hands are sweating as you fiddle with the ring box in your baggy jeans. you changed into a nicer outfit than your standard jb tshirt and jeans. and luckily julien is so enthralled in what’s happening on stage as both of your family flew in to see tonight’s show, she’s truly giving it her all.

you can’t help but tear up when david begins to play. knowing that you watched this trio of songs happen in real time. how much growing you both have done and how much love still remains. favor ends.

“Graceland Too” begins to play…

~flashback to 5 days ago~

you, phoebe and lucy sit in the green room while Julien is on the phone with whom ever.

“okay this is going to be the plan.” phoebe says looking at you. “i’m going to start Graceland, like normal, you’re going to sing the second verse, to the bridge and then we will sing the rest and turn off y’all’s mics so you can “privately” be all sappy” she says sitting back with a smirk on her face.

“that sounds amazing pheebs” you say finally wrapping it around you head you are about to marry your best friend.

~end of flashback~

phoebe begins the song, you just around out of plain sight to get out any last minute nerves and wait for the end of verse one, someone pack stage gives you a microphone and you receive the cue from lucy, who is also holding back tears as it’s common for julien to get so emotional during this part in the lineup.

“she could go home, but she’s not going to”

you walk out

“so she picks a direction it’s 90 to Memphis turns up the music so thoughts don’t intrude predictively winds up, thinking of Elvis and wonders if he believed songs could come true”

you walk out, singing those lyrics which at the time were so true, julien stops dead in her tracks, the crowd screams. you motion at her to take her guitar off. she does and hand it to a person working tech. you shut off the microphone and pull out one of her inears. you grab both of her hands and take a deep breath before staring into this big bambi eyes you love so much.

“julien rose baker, jb, my sweet angel. my personal chef, my moon and my everything, my best friend” you begin

julien is sobbing, lucy and phoebe continue to sing the piece.

“i have loved every second of the past 4 years, i’ve loved growing into a person with my perfect person. and i can’t imagine it any other way. i want to continue to grow this perfect foundation with you, heal the cracks and build a perfect, beautiful chapel with you. you are where i feel safe, where i feel the most like me, you are my perfect person julien, so if you would do me the favor” you say, fumbling for the box in your pocket and jumping to one knee.

“julien rose baker, will you give me the absolute gift of marrying you” you say looking into those large brown orbs again.

she reaches down to you getting on her knees

“jesus christ yes, yes yes yes yes” she tackles you to the floor both of you crying

she rolls the two of you over, kissing you so hard you can’t breathe.

“said she knows she lived through it to get to this moment”

you place the ring on her finger, it fitting beautifully

“i love you baby” you say kissing the side of her head.

“i love you more princess”

the song finishes, lucy and phoebe run over to give a huge hug. both of the sobbing

“congratulations lovebirds” phoebe says “let’s finish this show so we can all celebrate this!!”

[sxs-kav]

I saw Frozen Empire, so obviously I have to talk about it. Spoilers ahead.

Also disclaimer that these are my personal feelings, so if we disagree that's okay too!

So, overall I would rate the movie as good. Not my all time favorite in the franchise, I think that will always go to the original, but I enjoyed it. The story could have used a little work in some parts, but hey, nothing is perfect.

Favorite part of this whole movie: one Dr. Raymond Stantz, hands down. He is so cute as an old man-child whose enthusiasm hasn't waned the least bit over the years. Honestly, in Afterlife he seemed like he'd become cynical, but here his true nature really rang through. And I adore him being a mentor for Phoebe and the other younger characters, while also getting into mischief with them. That little sparkle in his eye when Phoebe asks "Aren't you retired?" No, Ray is never retired, he will always be ready to suit up.

I also loved in the police station when Phoebe was standing up to Dickless Peck, Ray had this face like he was so proud, like he could see Egon in her, memories of him saying "YOUR MOTHER!" 😆

The other thing I liked about the movie was the expansion of the Ghostbusters as a business, with the research lab. First off, I love that Winston, the one who didn't even believe in ghosts when he was hired, is now almost like the CEO of the company. But also, it opens up more possibilities for this new era and allows for more playing with the world building. Though I feel like it was a wasted opportunity to put in some easter eggs for TRGB. Unless the ghosts featured were in the (*shudder*) Q5 episodes, I didn't recognize any of them from the show. Then again, I guess they're newer ghosts so that wouldn't make sense, but maybe they could have been similar kinds of ghosts. Just as a small reference.

Other favorite parts include:

-The near-lesbian romance between Phoebe and Melody

-Ray smuggling the Mini Pufts from Oklahoma (because of course he would)

-Also just the Mini Pufts in general (why are they so violent?)

-The way Ray's face lit up when Peter came to the firehouse

-Peter being proud that Ray quit smoking

-Peter's unwavering faith that Ray's idea is good and will work, and saying they all trust him

-The library ghost (did they never go back to get her???)

-Gary saying the words to the theme song

-Janine in uniform!

-Slimer eating the pizza with the posesser ghost in it

Now, onto the areas that I felt were not as strong. First of all, I found it wild that Phoebe was being ousted by everyone without any kind of fight. She's the one that started the whole thing up again, she's got the passion, she's got the brains, she's got the glasses and the curls! Her mom says a grand total of NOTHING to defend her in Peck's office, and they all just accept that she can't be a Ghostbuster anymore. Yeah, they don't want to get sued, but it's just weird to me that they don't even seem like they feel that terrible that she got benched. Callie and Trevor are very callous about the whole thing. Only Gary seems like he gives a shit, and he's not even her dad. The way Phoebe's benching ended wasn't all that satisfying either. It would have been nice for the other three to maybe struggle a little without her, realize they need her to balance the team, and try to find a way to get her back. Winston was really the one that got Peck off their backs in the end, no thanks to anyone else (also, I'm pretty sure in that scene, someone in the crowd yells 'dickless' 😆).

Side note, I really don't like Callie's character that much. I think she's self-centered and doesn't seem to care about the kids' feelings unless the situation becomes dire. Maybe she does deep down, but mostly her attitude about everything stinks. Idk, I wouldn't care if she wasn't in the movie at all.

Anyway, back to the plot. I liked the idea of Phoebe's plotline. I wish they'd gone all the way and had her and Melody kiss, I really thought that was coming when she separated from her body. But I have an issue about that particular moment. The decision to suddenly put herself in the chamber like that seemed to come out of nowhere, at least I thought so. They made it like Melody was supposed to be the one tricking her into doing it, but she really never said anything to convince her. Phoebe just decided on her own to try it. I know she mentioned a couple of times wondering what it would feel like to be a ghost, but it wasn't a strong enough buildup to such a risky move. Honestly, when she asked Ray about him wanting to be a ghost, coupled with Winston saying Ray was going to get himself killed, I thought they were foreshadowing killing Ray (and thank God they didn't!).

They also hint at Phoebe specifically being the one that needs to be used but why? Anyone could have been tricked into the chamber and been controlled by Garaka for the chanting.

But moving on from that, the other issue I have is with the firemaster. He was a little too good at controling the fire after what, a couple of hours of practice? I think the character could still work, he could still be a quirky weird guy, but I think I would have made him more of a reluctant inheritor of his grandma's powers. Maybe he struggles with it at first and he figures he can sell the artifacts to Ray to get rid of the responsibility. Then later he can finally accept his fate to help beat Garaka when he starts believing in himself.

Those are the only major parts that I felt could have been tweaked. Besides that, I would have loved to see Slimer and Ray get a moment, just as a nod to their friendship in the show, but I guess they want to stick to one continuity. Of all the things they could have referenced from the show, though, it had to be the Junior GB 😆 It was just a throwaway line, but still, I don't want to remember they were a thing.

Tl;dr, the movie was good and there were a lot of parts I really enjoyed. For the parts that were weak, I'm confident there will be another in the future, so hopefully they'll keep improving.

Also, who the hell voted for Peck to be mayor? I bet he rigged the election.

[berzahoes]

made with love | spike jonze

summary: while on a date night, yours and spike’s daughter teaches instagram how to bake the perfect brownies (and it doesn’t go terribly wrong!)

an: yes this is inspired by sofia coppola’s daughters tiktok 🧍🏽‍♀️ romy, i’m still waiting on part 2 😭 this takes place in the same universe of my past spike fics <3

you and spike haven’t had date nights in a while. you were busy trying to write the script for the batman 2 while spike was busy with vice media and he was getting ready for his directing comeback with a netflix series in the making. it was clear that a date night wasn’t in either of your schedules so when you had a day off from writing, as well as spike, you both decided it was time for a night to yourselves.

even your kids wanted you to leave the house for once.

layne, your eldest boy, told you that he would look after his sister, phoebe, while you and spike went on your date. in reality, he was only going to invite a couple of friends over and watch some movies in his room, he really wanted his parents out of the house.

“are you sure? i can call lindsay to babysit—”

“mom! i’m seventeen, i don’t need a babysitter. don’t call her, i can watch my own annoying sister.” layne replied.

“don’t remind me that you’re growing up! i miss when my babies were still babies.” you kissed your son’s cheek repeatedly.

“I think one of your babies is trying to burn the house down.” spike mentioned as phoebe tried to figure out what button to push to turn on the oven.

“phoebe, what are you doing?” you ask as you approach your fourteen year old daughter.

“i want to make brownies. grandma texted me her recipe and you know i love grandma’s brownies. she makes them so fudgy.” phoebe

“it’s this one, but your brother has to be in the room when you make them. i don’t want you to hurt yourself or burn something.” you explained.

“it sounds like you have no faith in me, mother,” phoebe quickly gave you a kiss on the cheek then ran towards spike and kissed him on the cheek too. “go before mom changes her mind about date night and leave room for my brownies!”

you playfully rolled your eyes at phoebe’s words and as you walked away, you warned them about the oven.

“i’m practically an adult. i know what to do in case of a fire,” layne assured you, which made you nervous. “not that there’s going to be one.”

“okay we’ll, call us if you need anything and if we don’t answer—” layne cut you off.

“go to the neighbors. bye, have fun, don’t do anything bad because i don’t have bail money!” layne practically pushed you and spike out the door.

soon, you and spike were on your way to your dinner reservations. it took some time, but you were okay with the idea of your two kids being home alone, after all layne was about to turn eighteen and soon he’ll want to leave and probably get an apartment with friends—

“they’re going to be okay.” spike pulled you back into the real world.

“i know . . i just worry. every mother worries for her babies. they’re our babies, spike.” you reply.

“yeah and our babies are teenagers. they don’t need babysitters, they think stuff like that is not necessary. let’s enjoy our night, our teenager free night.” he leaned closer to you, giving you a kiss on the lips.

“i’m sorry. i think once i turned into a mom, i worry even more. they’re probably just watching a movie or baking those brownies phoebe wanted.”

“have you seen ‘her’? no, i don’t know what that is.”

phoebe had the bright idea to go live on instagram while she baked the brownies. you and spike had one rule for your kids when it came to social media and that was to keep it private. you and spike were more stricter about social media with phoebe since she was fourteen, but that didn’t stop her from making a public account just for memes and jokes.

“guys, I don’t know where my parents keep their oscars, they hardly live here.” phoebe said as she started to preheat the oven. “that makes me sound like an orphan, i promise i’m not.”

@/jonzefilms: TELL YOUR DAD I LOVE HIM

“not the film bros in my live.” phoebe ignored the comment and read more.

@layne_spiegel: bring me brownies or i tell mom and dad about this account

“do my math homework or i tell mom and dad that you were the one that used their credit cards to buy the hat that willem dafoe wore in that creepy movie with edward cullen.” phoebe stated as she waited for her brother to comment back. she knew that if you or spike found out about the big purchase layne did then he would most likely get grounded.

@cinemastarsss: stan phoebe jonze for clear skin

phoebe saw the comment and laughed. of course she wasn’t going to correct the person about her last name, she actually enjoyed being called phoebe jonze instead of phoebe spiegel.

@layne_spiegel: snitch

@layne_spiegel: do you need your science hw done too? pls don’t tell them

after a while of answering questions and getting the brownie batter done, phoebe was ready to start pouring it into the oven safe container. she then saw a comment that caught her attention.

@/yourusername: hi phoebe ❤️ dad wants to know if you’re done with your brownies because we’re on our way home :)

phoebe laughed nervously. how did you find her account? it would remain a mystery to her. in reality, you had stumbled on her account one day when you noticed that layne followed it then you realized it was phoebe when the account would always post breaking bad memes that phoebe always showed you.

“hi momma, the brownies are almost done, and i hope I’m not grounded, bye!” she quickly turned off the live.

from the car, you watched as your daughter ended her live. you chuckled and put away your phone.

“at least we know who used our credit cards.” spike said.

“he’s going to be the death of me.”

[sylvies-chen]

aight folks you know the drill, prepare for MUCH happier thoughts this week on everybody’s favourite segment…

TED LASSO 3.10 THOUGHTS

for a show about football, ted lasso REALLY thrives on episodes that have very little to do with the actual game

phoebe is the star of this episode she’s an unproblematic cheerful queen and a roy kent stan and honestly? no flaws. I love her.

her calling roy and jamie best friends and them slowly accepting it was probably my favourite thing in the entire universe. if they cured cancer, this would still be my favourite thing ever (dw cancer takes a close second though). ROY AND JAMIE BEST FRIENDSSSS AND THE GIFT HE GAVE ROY WAS SO PERFECT equal parts thoughtful/heartfelt and immature/goofy just like jamie. AMAZING.

my thoughts on roykeeley are so insanely positive that they’ll need their own post but I think it’s all pretty clear now that jamie/keeley was a red herring and jamie now has amazing chemistry with sam and this is my rarepair now thank you very much

real talk though this is what I’ve been wanting from keeley ALLLL SEASON, her finally finding someone to properly mentor her!! may was the unexpectedly best choice ever!! and for keeley to actually get to fight for her career, to see her not give up, and to build something from the ground with women she KNOWS support her, like *chefs kiss* I LOVE THIS ENERGY I JUST WISH IT HAD COME SOONER CAUSE DAMN I NEED MORE

rebecca girlbossed that shit and maybe the psychic saying she was going to be a mother was in reference to her going off at all those rich men and their baby selves because LITERALLY MOTHER WAS MOTHERING Y’ALL

also baby rebecca THE CUTEST and her almost having a panic attack in the mirror but being grounded through seeing her younger self is honestly such a beautiful image. I think of it in parallel to ted, who nipped his panic attack in the bud earlier in the season by using his techniques but also by thinking of his son. something about the reminder of youth and innocence bringing you back to who you are and like yeah I’m emotional about it!

all in all this episode was so so sooooo good it was a 10/10 for me!! I need separate posts to talk about more of my thoughts like that’s how much I loved it

[vanquishedmelon]

To Call a Lost Sister

Prue Halliwell Appreciation Week - Day 7: Free Choice.

Prue and Paige.

Once her initial anger wore off, Prue knew she had to do whatever she could to bring her baby sister home. Read below the cut or on Ao3.

Author's Note: You may notice that this ficlet does not follow the established canon of my ficlet from Day 1. That is because I was trying my best to recreate the Charmed Writer's Room.

When you danced with death every day, it was natural to imagine what that eventual day would be like. Prue held onto the idea of a heartfelt reunion with her mother and grandmother, maybe even Andy as well. Unfortunately, it didn’t go quite so well.

Unaware of what new abilities she now possessed as a spirit, Prue didn’t know how she wisped away from them, but she knew why. She thought Mom and Grams would understand how vulnerable Piper and Phoebe are now, and how badly she needed to go back to help them. ‘Reassuring’ her with news of a secret sister wasn’t the support she wanted or needed. They didn’t need a stranger, they needed her.

Alone and furious, the sudden sensation of hands on her shoulders grounded her again. She recognised their owner without turning around as his familiar scent washed over her.

Andy squeezed her shoulders comfortingly. “I’m sorry I wasn’t there to meet you,” he said. “Your Grams wouldn’t let me.”

Any anger that dissipated at Andy’s presence resurfaced at his words. Prue scoffed. “Yeah, she’s too focused on trying to control my destiny.”

She looked over her shoulder, turning around as she spoke. “Did you know?”

“Know what…?”

Taking his answer as genuine, she explained. “Mom had another baby she had to give up. And now they’re acting like that fact is supposed to solve everything.”

“How?”

“By reforming the Charmed Ones. Continuing the Power of Three. But they don’t understand. They’re too vulnerable right now. Emotionally and magically. Finding this sister may solve the magical problem but it just worsens the other.”

Andy sighed, a hand coming up to cradle Prue’s cheek. “They’re big girls now, Prue. They’ll be okay.”

“No. Piper’s powers are out of control and Phoebe is so focused on Cole—”

“They’ll be okay.”

His words were firm but so full of reassurance. Looking up into his eyes, Prue was struck by just how much they connected and how much she missed him. How could anyone else have ever compared to him? And it wasn’t just that. She wanted to trust him—Andy would never lie to her. But… her sisters…

“They need me.” She struggled to keep a level voice.

“Yes, they do.” Andy agreed. “But you aren’t powerless here. You can still help them.”

“How…?”

“You’re a smart girl, you’ll figure it out.” Andy said, planting a kiss on her forehead before wisping away, leaving Prue to consider his words.

Closing her eyes, her mind drifted to her sisters, the sound of Piper’s voice soon filling her ears. Focusing on it further, the scene soon came to view in her mind’s eye. Piper, casting the To Call a Lost Witch spell, surrounded by herbs and candles and—the Book of Shadows.

That was it. She opened her eyes with a gasp, a rush of adrenaline flowing through her. The Book. Grams used it all the time as a spirit, didn’t she? Surely she could do the same?

Prue began to pace, thinking up a plan. The spell Piper was using was perfect, but she needed to rework it… She had combined spells before, she could do it again now.

Her spell ready, she hurriedly tried to get back to Piper—Prue hoped that using the Book in front of her would help her accept what was to happen. However when she returned, Phoebe was nudging Piper from the attic, the Book now closed on the table.

With a breath, Prue tried to channel her power through to the Book, opening it to the page Piper had been on. Another, nervous breath. Now for the spell.

In this night and in this hour, I call upon the Ancient Power, Return our sister to her home, No longer may she stand alone, Blood to blood, I summon thee, Reconstitute the Power of Three.

Immediately after the last word of the spell was spoken, white lights began to swirl around the book, and the pages flipped uncontrollably until the Book closed itself with a thud, the triquetra symbol on the front glowing. As the glow dissipated, Prue felt an indescribable feeling within, as though chains she didn’t know she were carrying were cut free. Her tether to the Power of Three had broken, she realised. And as the scene faded from her view, Prue knew that this was what her sisters needed. Their bond as sisters would forever remain, but their bond as Charmed Ones needed to be broken.

And with that bond broken, they had the power to create a new bond with their new sister.

Andy was right; they’ll be okay.

[faithsknife]

46, Goldrose👀

envy or jealousy+ goldrose? ;) perfect

send me a ship and a number and i will write a kiss

Across the room, Rhys could see Joe, looking sharp as ever, but he was being accompanied by Kate. The same woman whose father was trying to bury him during the mayoral race. A feeling bubbled inside Rhys, and he was ashamed to say he felt...envious. He had yet to make his feelings for Joe known. In fact, all he had done so far was make Joe smash records and become enraged about killing for him (despite how he'd done it many times before).

Rhys got himself another drink from the bar, and this time it was three fingers of whiskey. It was bloody ridiculous to behave this way, especially when he was running for mayor. Appearances were everything, after all.

He waited at the bar, facing the crowd of people partying like animals and laughing like they had no care in the world. And they certainly didn't. Rhys impatiently watched Joe pretend to mingle with the same people he loathed. Meanwhile, the slender hand that touched Joe's arm made Rhys grit his teeth.

As soon as Kate was pulled off somewhere by Phoebe, that's when Rhys left the bar and approached the man.

“Evening, Jonathan. Do you figure we could slip away for a chat?” Rhys could barely hide the irritation on his face.

Rather than play a game of resistance, Joe rolled his eyes and followed Rhys' lead to a more secluded area in Sundry House. The sounds from the wild events of Adam's haven for insanity were drowned out. And all that was left was them.

"What the hell do you want now, Rhys? I framed that unstable woman for you, and I'm planning to take care of Tom Lockwood. What more do you want?" Joe looked utterly exhausted by their conversation. And that didn't sit well with Rhys in the slightest.

"Nothing. I'm just curious what you want."

"What I want? What -"

Rhys scoffed before backing Joe up against the door of the incredibly furnished room. "Are you here with Kate because you actually fancy her or are you using her to stop thinking about me?"

The startled look on Joe's face made Rhys cup the other man's cheek. He held him like a holy thing, and Joe looked at him like he was in the presence of a god. Shaken and uncertain of the best course of action.

"She can't give you what you really need, Joe. Let me give that to you." Rhys let his hand fall from Joe's face and pressed flush against him. "Tell me to stop, and I will."

When he got no objection from Joe and a hand shakily rested against Rhys' side and slipped under his shirt, Rhys inhaled the scent near Joe's neck. And from there, Rhys found his way to Joe's lips. He kissed Joe with an urgency like they required each other to breathe. Rhys let out all the cloudy emotions he felt over Kate trying to claim Joe by grinding against him, as he kissed him roughly.

Fuck Kate.

Rhys guided them towards the unused bed, never breaking the kiss until the back of Joe's knees hit the bed. He pushed the man who was perfect for him and vice versa, onto the bed and settled over him. They kept kissing and with each touch and touching of tongues, Rhys made it clear who deserved Joe.

Each kiss made Joe stir under him, and that stirring turned into Joe eventually pulling away. He moved out from underneath Rhys with his hair dishevelled and his lips swollen.

"I have to go, Kate is going to wonder where I went." Joe didn't spare Rhys a single glance before speeding out of the room.

Rhys caught his breath and stared up at the ceiling to plot out how he was going to take care of Katherine.

[caitlinmarie671]

“Look. I need to apologize okay.” “You should buy them in bulk if you’re going to hand apologies out that often.” Quinn told him. “Look will you just…I don’t know how to do this alright?” He admitted to her. “I’m not like you.” “What does that mean?” Quinn said looking at him defensively. “I screw up a lot alright. And being around you. I just…I don’t want to be that guy anymore.” He told her seriously and genuinely. “Well who do you want to be Klaus?” Quinn demanded. “I want to be someone who’s good enough to be seen with you.” Quinn stared at him for a moment to see if he was telling the truth before speaking. “Well you should’ve thought about that a week ago! You know I keep putting myself, my better judgment, and my relationship with my loved ones out there for you and you keep blowing it! Which is probably a good thing because at this point there’s nothing that you can say or do that’s going to surprise me!” Quinn was cut off when suddenly Klaus leaned down and kissed her lips. As he pulled away, Quinn was shocked. Her eyes were wide, and her heart was beating so fast. She was sure it was going to pop out of her chest any moment. “Expect that.” Quinn breathed out. “You shouldn’t have done that Klaus.” Quinn said in a breathy soft tone. “But I wanted to.” Klaus told her giving her a small smile. “Yes.” Quinn said her voice almost a whisper before she stared at him a moment longer before throwing her arms around his neck and leaning up and kissing him. As she pulled away from the kiss moments later. She could see Klaus’s shocked and surprised yet genuinely happy look on Klaus’s face as she just smiled at him nervously, and he returned her smile, and she knew there was no way they could turn back whatever this was now. End of flashback.* Quinn was smiling down at her children as she remembered that day. That kiss. Their very first kiss and she was not over exaggerating when she said it was absolutely perfect. No fairytale could compare. “And they lived happily ever after! Right mommy?!” Phoebe asked her eagerly a large smile draped across her daughters lips. “Yes they did sweetheart.” Quinn smiled at her daughters enthusiasm. “Tell us another one auntie Quinn?!” Alexander begged her eagerly.

[phpruitts]

It just keeps getting worse. And worse, and worse, and worse, and worse, like Phoebe is at the bottom of a deep whole and she wants to cry out and fucking beg someone to save her right now. Except there's no point in that. Because the only person she wants to save her right now is Raf, but that won't work, because Phoebe isn't anything serious. And she doesn't have the right to ask to be saved.

Her hand is in Rafael's and it's the only thing that's keeping her upright.

'We can go find moonlight tonight, if you want.'

'Or we could go back to Italy. Right now, if you want.'

There's the slight press of his forehead against hers, this moment of warm contact, and Phoebe can feel her mouth slacken a bit, something pass through every limb, some consequential tremor that rips through her heart and bones and sinew and destroys her like a ballistic.

Why would he ask that?

Why?

Wasn't he going to be getting back together with her? Did he feel guilty? Maybe it wasn't serious, but he had grown a bit fond of her— in some inconsequential way, and he wasn't looking forward to breaking the news, asking, gently, that she leave his place once he and the girl finally got back together. Maybe he was trying to give Phoebe one last good experience. It was more than she really deserved.

And the thing was, she wanted it. God she fucking wanted it. Wanted it more badly than water, after forty years in the desert, wanted it more badly than her cells wanted oxygen.

She wanted Rafael, every moment spent brushing their hair in the mirror, ducking into the ancient bakery on Positano's ancient streets, plunging into the sharp saltwater and laughing, limbs wrapped around each other tight, impossible to disconnect. She wanted to pour his coffee in the morning. Halve his toast. Kiss him until the whole world was forgotten.

Phoebe can't help herself, because for one moment, her hand reaches out, of its own mind, and touches Rafael's cheek. It retracts quickly. She's afraid her eyes are going to look wet.

Something settles over her shoulders like a leaden blanket.

"Your mom would miss us if we went outside right now."

Take me to Italy, and tell me what to do so you'll love me.

That's what Phoebe wants to say. Tell me every step, every major and minor thing I need to do accomplish to earn your love, and Phoebe would do it. To the letter. I love you so bad I'll do anything. You're so fucking perfect for me I'll do anything.

Whenever Phoebe wanted comfort, or wanted to comfort Raf, she always thought about burying her face in his chest. Nuzzling between his neck and shoulder, planting dozens of kisses. Right now Phoebe just stares down at the floor, tries to offer an expression that's somewhat normal.

"Maybe in a little bit."

"Almost. Yeah. Just a little less moonlight."

Rafael tried not to frown. He could see it in her face. What changed? What happened? He wanted to ask but — Rafael was also terrified of the answer. Had he done something? Did someone say something to her?

Rafael would do anything to fix it. Whatever it was. He kept a hand firmly at her back, brushing over the fabric there. He ducked down slightly, pressed his forehead against hers.

Talk to me, he wanted to say, but the words wouldn’t come out. He hoped that she just understood.

“We can go find moonlight tonight, if you want.”

He thought about the nights they’d spent under the moon — the night they’d met, out on the balcony. Phoebe in her angel wings, causing trouble. The night he’d saved her life, rushing to his car. Italy.

“Or we could go back to Italy. Right now, if you want.”

He smiled. He was half joking, but. If that’s what it took to get her to smile, he’d do it, without thinking twice. If that fixed whatever was going on, he’d do it.

[figmentof]

So the ‘eager to please’ biscuit spit choice was kind of an interesting one for me. Like obviously Rebecca isn’t seeing Ted in that way yet, that’s how slow burn works. But she’s also eating his biscuits, she knows damn well he’s eager to please (and how fabulous that is). She just hasn’t thought about it in that context and it takes her by surprise. And there’s really no reason for them to go so hard (no pun) on ‘ted is good in bed’ unless it’s going to be relevant!

If we’re talking directorial choices, please can someone come up with a platonic explanation for Rebecca fussing with her hair and jacket towards the end of the Xmas episode (literally the ep after the biscuit spit). Oh right there is none, she is flustered as hell and not sure why.

i might as well get "THE SACRED TEXTSPARALLELS" tattooed in block letters across my gotdang forehead but lest we forget that both Ted and Rebecca had sex on the same night (albeit with different people), the same day that was also the wedding anniversary of Rebecca's failed marriage AND the day Ted's divorce was finalized. it was written in the script (by the war criminal that is Jason Sudeikis) that even though Rebecca's was eyeing the attractive waiter, Ted was on her mind the entire time. i ask, once again, why these parallels? why does the show need to let me see the morning after and their various "walks of shame" of these two friends if not to subliminally imply something? no one goes that out of their way to showcase incompatibility between two people; that makes for an awfully dull and redundant story

Rebecca spitting out the biscuits could have so many different interpretations and like, none of them would be wrong? is she disgusted by this trivia about her gaffer/employee? that's possible. did she spit it out by surprise at the "this people pleaser's need to please extends to the bedroom"? yeah. did her mouth suddenly run dry at the fact that "oh wait Ted is indeed a man that has sexual needs!"? perhaps.

if you went to anyone else and told them Ted's really eager to please in bed, 99% of the response would be "oh ew gross why tf did you feel the need to tell me that?!" so in my opinion, it isn't solid enough of evidence to use as an argument against Ted/Rebecca. and just like you said anon, Rebecca doesn't see him that way yet, mostly because.... she's his boss, her revenge plot (albeit already in shambles) is still going, and she was, and still is, the only person who saw him at his most vulnerable having a panic attack. she's not Keeley who gets off on her man crying lmao but even that is played for comedic effect of how Roy's usually so stoic that him being emotional is refreshing

LET US TALK ABOUT THE CHRISTMAS EPISODE. let us talk about how given two extra episodes that a holiday rom com inspired Christmas episode is what Jason and co. decided to give us

let us talk about parallels yet again (triple edition): Leslie and Julie showcasing how their healthy and happy 25+ years of marriage has created such a warm and safe space that the players all want to be there because they make them feel at home (a future all couples should strive to have); Roy and Keeley as an established couple showcasing how good of parents they'd be through Phoebe (next stop: marriage); Ted and Rebecca as two lonely souls during a holiday of love and gathering, coming together to share a tradition that Rebecca used to do with her ex-husband that she knew would make Ted happy because it was an act of actively spreading love, thus showcasing how their core values are the same (next stop: kiss kiss fall in love 😌)

let us talk about how Rebecca throws stones at Ted's window like she's a teen boy in the '90s trying to get his crushes attention, and uses tinsels to spell out "HI TED" in direct response to his "HI BOSS" (everyone in Richmond Greens watching these two idiots chase each other like they're in a rom com 💀). Ted's "oh no should i change?" and Rebecca saying he "looks perfect" taking a page out of those guilty pleasure Hallmark holiday flicks. the end of the evening with them walking with zero (0) personal space between them and Rebecca's fidgeting with her coat lapel that isn't a single thread out of place while Ted has his hands in his pockets because you know these two want to h*ld hands but they can't yet but they wanna and like at some point their hands are gonna touch and we might as well get a 2005 Pride and Prejudice Mr. Darcy hand flex shot from one of them oh god oh fuck i'm fully feral now

but getting flustered after spending an entire day with a very lovely man is totes platonic behavior y'know

[sumire-bride]

𖧷ɤ———ɤ𖧷

Sumire as a mother.

𖧷ɤ———ɤ𖧷

(( For the person that asked this :) ))

TW: POSSIBLE WARNING FOR PANIC ATTACKS, FORMS OF GENERATIONAL TRAUMA, IF ANYTHING ELSE PLEASE TELL ME SO I CAN ADD THEM :) enjoy

𖧷ɤ———ɤ𖧷

𖧷ɤ— Sumire's motherly by nature, it is no surprise her children would experience her loving and affectionate nature. Filling her children with so much kisses, hugs, and love they could taste it on their tongues.

𖧷ɤ— Her having children would give her the proper ability to change, be a better person and come to terms with her past, she'd sleep more, could get less scared of the dark and people approaching her from behind.

𖧷ɤ— She would sing to her children, easily putting them to sleep. Gently petting their hair as they fall into a hopefully peaceful sleep. She'd like to assume her precious babies aren't forced to deal with haunted memories or creepy unwanted creatures in their time of resting, if so.. Their darling mother will have her sword ready! Come straight into her arms and you'll be fine.

𖧷ɤ—Outside. Outside don't care what they say she will make sure they go outside at least twice a day. Under proper watch of course. She'll teach her children the beauty of things, even as ugly those bugs and dirt are, they're pretty.

𖧷ɤ— She'll teach them many things. Chinese, piano, how to read. It's important after all.

𖧷ɤ— She's no perfect picture mother though, or person. She has her flaws a lot of them loaded with a large amount of baggage. She may have learned to be more comfortable with her child creeping up behind her, but that didn't stop the unwanted quiet whispers, the loud banging foot steps creeping behind her. That feeling can't just magically go away. Child or not, if she's not in the proper mood or mind set and her child hugs her from behind, grabbing her pale legs, she'll scream like a victim being murdered, she might mistake her childs voice for Anzu's.. Or Koukai's, maybe the her twin brothers. She won't want to touch or have anything to do with her child until she's in a better head space.

𖧷ɤ— As they are babies she won't be able to deal with the crying, the constant crying from either waking up from a nap, nightmare, or maybe they hurt themselves, it might make her freak out, as she's rocking them back to sleep if you don't guide her properly she might hold the baby too tight, you as her partner will have to calm her down sooth her until her heavy breathing stops. Don't touch her or the baby, use your words.

𖧷ɤ— The child is going to suffer a form of what Sumire was raised with. Keeping your emotions inside, "crying is bad... He's going to get mad at us..." She won't do what Xaing did to her to her children nor react that same, but she will tell her children what their doing is bad without any explanation why it's 'bad' just that it's bad. She might also tell her children it makes HER upset when their upset. This is saying if she wasn't able to completely get over her fathers doings, she may still tell her child it's bad, but if the ending is she's realized it's okay to cry and be angry, she could be a little bit of comfort to her child. Maybe physically wise.

𖧷ɤ— Sumire will have to soon realize children grow up, her kids get into their teens becoming less dependant on her that will scare her, so much so she'll have a lot of questions, because she never got to experience a proper teenage life she'll be too afraid of letting her teenagers do certain things that aren't bad for teenagers to do. You will need to remind her that they aren't toddlers anymore. She has a hard time letting them go.

SUMIRE- "..But that is too dangerous for a child your age..."

CHILD- "...I'm 16."

SUMIRE- "..It is too late to be outside... Look how bright (dark) it is... Uu... You can fathom how much it would wound me to see you hurt.. Or even worse... Dead...!!"

𖧷ɤ— Losing her child, or god no don't even mention it. Her child dying or leaving for a long period of time will have her all over the place. In the case her child dies, she'll blame her carelessness, and will refuse to stop crying, it will take forever for her to accept her child's death.

𖧷ɤ— If the child perhaps goes off to college she'll just be anxious and overly worried and over flow them with messages asking if their okay and staying out of trouble. She'll need her partner to help her relax. She might also end up tearing up watching them fly out of the nest.

𖧷ɤ— All together, she won't like having maids or anyone unless her partner holding or going near her child. It's something she just has a hard time allowing. Overly protective.

𖧷ɤ— This isn't to say Sumire will be a horrible mother, no not at all. She'd be a god damn amazing mother and will try her hardest to give her child a lot of freedom, she will try not to become like her parents or siblings, and will only want to treat her child with love. She may not realize the slip ups she makes, you'll have to make her realize.

𖧷ɤ— Just help her guide her blind eyes into the right direction, you'll have to help her a bit. She'd 93% be a great AMAZING mother, but her trauma pulls her back. Pull her out of the little hole she was forced to please.

𖧷ɤ———ɤ𖧷

[coffeedrgn87]

Fic Authors Self Rec

Thank you very much for tagging, @phoebe-delia. Since I have 150 works to choose from and do not possess the ability to be impartial about the fruits of my hard labour, I will take @basicallyahedgehog's advice and use a random number generator.

The numbers I rolled are 1, 3, 9, 53, and 107. And because I rely on Georgie to help me make decisions (what, adulting is hard), we're going with number 1 being my most recent fic.

1 - in the jungle, in the mighty jungle [Dronarry, M, 2.2K] Summary: In which Ron's got himself into a pickle, and it's up to Draco and Harry to fix it. 🌟💜 Well, what can I say? This was my first time writing Dronarry, and I am still reeling from the experience. It's my response to the prompt 'jungle', which the lovely @veelawings left in my asks, and I'm so grateful for getting the chance to write something for this gorgeous triad, especially after @wolfpants' Tiny Home changed me for all eternity. By the way, if you'd like to prompt me, here's a list.

3 - Draco’s Bat Burrito [Drarry, T, 410 words] Summary: The fastest way to bring out Draco's soft side is to put him in charge of a bat baby. 🌟💜 A fabulous conversation with my darling @emmalovesdilemmas [check out this amazing site blog that gives me all the fuzzies] led to the existence of this little drabble. Both it and the giftee have a special place in my heart. If you don't know what a bat burrito is, check out this video, your life will be richer for it.

9 - tell me you love me without telling me you love me [Harry/Charlie, T, 610 words] Summary: In which Charlie finds a way to express his affection for Harry, and Harry is perfectly fine with that. 🌟💜 Sometimes, the mood to write strikes me, but I have zero ideas. Thankfully, my dearest Ali (@nv-md) always has something up her sleeve, so all I have to do is ask for prompts [Overexposed and As You Wish, Minister ruined me, by the way, I will never be the same ever again, and I don't want to be]. The prompt for this particular fic was 'forehead kisses', and since I have a very soft spot for Harry/Charlie, the choice was easily made.

53 - Practicing for the ballet, Potter? [Drarry, T, 234 words] Summary: They never tire of this, know just how to pass the time. 🌟💜 I don't know what on earth made me write this. A likely story is having Draco's iconic line stuck in my head, and simply didn't know what to do with it. I was also trying to experiment with a slightly different style of writing, at least I think I was.

107 - The Day The Weasel Crashed The Party (And Got More Than He Bargained For) [Drarry, M, 3.3K] Summary: It's a perfect evening; the restaurant is exquisite, the champagne is cool and bubbly, and Harry is in the company of the only man he wants to spend tonight with…until his best friend, Ronald Weasley, makes a surprise appearance. Things can only go pear-shaped from here on, or can they? 🌟💜 Oh wow, this tale is like three years old, which makes me somewhat hesitant to take a closer look at the writing. I should really have more faith in my writing. Anyways, I haven't thought about this particular fic for a good while, but I do remember it was fun to write. I got the inspiration from this little clip created by @paquim, who is incredibly talented. Weirdly enough, after writing my first Dronarry, I feel like this fic is the perfect requisite to eventually get them together.

Once again, thanks so much for the tag, Pheebs. I'm extending this to @wolfpants @nv-md @cavendishbutterfly @makeitp1nk @nelweensfic @aqua-myosotis @thebooktopus @corvuscrowned @ghaniblue and whoever else would like to take a trip down memory lane and share some of their works.

[atlabeth]

everything happens for a reason part 4 - zuko x fem!reader

The night was full of terrors and your eyes were full of tears

part 3 | masterlist | part 5

a/n: i told you this was where everything starts to go downhill !! throw one out for my girl kura though water tribe mothers stay winnin

i had this scheduled for next week but elle wanted angst so it’s out today😁😁

wc: 2.9k

warning(s): threats/talks of killing and violence, lots of stress, ozai being the worst (and racist), basically just. angst

chapter title comes from the night we met by lord huron + phoebe bridgers!

The blood in her veins turned to ice as she shot a panicked look at Zuko.

“What?” A frown was already forming on Zuko’s face despite his efforts to remain impassive. “Why?”

“I’m unaware of the reason, my prince. All I know is that I am supposed to escort you to the throne room, then once you are finished to deliver the servant. Another guard will be here shortly for her.” A pregnant pause hung in the air as the two children met each other’s eyes, the fear obvious in Y/N’s.

“I’m sure you know that the Fire Lord does not like to be kept waiting, Prince Zuko.” The guard’s voice brought them back to reality and Zuko nodded unsteadily as he began to walk with the guard, shooting a look that he hoped was reassuring back at Y/N.

She couldn’t even return the sentiment — she was completely frozen in place despite the age old urge to run shooting through her body. Servants didn’t meet with the Fire Lord in any sort of formal way — Spirits, they barely even talked to the royal family as a whole unless it was for some kind of business reason; even then they were at risk of their infamous explosive tempers.

Y/N might’ve been young, but she understood just as much — she was as good as dead the moment that guard arrived.

What was she supposed to do? Y/N was a child, a servant — if the Fire Lord wanted to see her, she had no choice but to follow along with it. But she knew that nothing good was going to come out of this. She cherished her friendship with Zuko more than anything but she hadn’t been treating it as seriously as she should’ve.

Her mother was right. She couldn’t imagine her life without Zuko now, but Y/N knew now that she never should’ve attempted anything more than professionalism. The Fire Nation was a cruel place, the Fire Lord was a cruel man, and she was going to pay the price for trying to go against it.

As if summoned by her thoughts, her mother came storming around the corner with an unusual haste in her step, the fire blazing in her eyes only offset by the pure horror.

“Y/N, what did you do?” Her mother’s frenzied voice went in one ear and out the other as she just stared at her wide eyed, mouth opening and closing but nothing coming out. “Why did I hear the Fire Lord’s personal servants talking about meeting with a servant girl?”

“I— I—” The stammered syllable was all that she could get out, but Kura didn’t wait for an answer. She grabbed her daughter’s hand and began to run, constantly looking behind her as they darted through the hallways towards the servants’ quarters. Once they had arrived, she slammed the door shut behind them and immediately got to work.

“I’m sorry!” she cried, finally managing to form a sentence. “I— I’m sorry, I wasn’t thinking about—”

“You weren’t thinking about anything!” Kura flew around the room, shoving various items into a satchel and all but clearing out Y/N’s area of the quarters. “I told you to be careful just talking to him, and now— now this?”

“I’m sorry!” Y/N repeated, her words coming out in between choked sobs. Her head was spinning and she could barely breathe — no more than twenty minutes ago everything was perfect, how did it go so wrong so quickly? “I thought we were safe, I thought that they wouldn’t know—”

“The Fire Lord will always find out,” Kura muttered, still a whirlwind around the room as she tried to think of anything her daughter could need. “I was too lenient. I should have never let you get close to him.”

“I don’t know how it happened, but I started liking him and he started liking me and we went out into the city even though I knew we shouldn’t have and he told me he liked me and I like him even more now but now I’ve ruined everything!” Y/N heaved another shaky breath, the words flowing out of her like water as tremors ran through her whole body. “And now the Fire Lord is going to kill me!” she sobbed.

“Nothing is going to happen to you, baby. Okay? Not as long as I’m here.” Kura threw a cloak behind her at Y/N. “Put that on.”

“Why?” She began to do what her mother asked, but questioned it anyway.

“Because I’m going to get you out of here.” She dug through a parcel of coins and after a quick count, threw it into the bag as well. “The Fire Lord wants to mess with my daughter?” she muttered to herself. “He’s going to have to go through me first.”

“How?” Y/N asked yet again, her voice just as uncertain as she felt — it was like she was incapable of anything other than one word responses.

Satisfied with the contents of the satchel, she put the strap over Y/N’s shoulder. She then knelt on the ground in front of her and adjusted her cloak, carefully pulling the hood over her head to conceal any distinguishing features. “I want you to listen to me, and I want you to memorize every word I say. Is that clear?”

Y/N nodded and Kura cast another glance at the door, as if expecting the Fire Lord himself to burst through the door at any moment, before turning back to her daughter. “Alright. You are going to leave the palace through the servant door near the infirmary. You’re lucky — the guards should be changing shifts around this time, so if you move quickly you’ll be able to make it past the walls without getting caught. Do not stop running until you reach Harbor City — I don't care how tired you get or how much your legs ache, do not stop. Ask around for Eisuke, but be careful; the place is brewing with criminals. Once you find him, tell him you are Kura’s daughter. He’ll be able to get you out of the city; if he wants coin, give it to him. From there—”

The door burst open all of a sudden and Kura shot up, instinctively hiding Y/N behind her. She relaxed when she saw it was only Aiko, but the somber look on her face told her all she needed to know.

“There’s a guard looking around for Y/N,” she warned. “I managed to throw him off the path for now, but it’s not going to last. If you’re going to get her out, you need to do it now.”

Kura turned back to her daughter, once again kneeling in front of her. “From there, do whatever you can to get to the Earth Kingdom. You’ll have far more allies there than anywhere in the Fire Nation. Once you get far enough north, you’ll be able to find a boat to take you to the Northern Water Tribe. Tell them that you are Kura’s daughter, and show them this.”

She ripped her necklace off from around her neck and tucked it into Y/N’s hand — a simple band with a blue stone carved in the shape of a flower — and closed her fingers around it. “They’ll recognize it from my time in the tribe, and they will help you. Do you understand?”

Y/N swallowed the lump in her throat and nodded, her eyes already shimmering with tears. “I’m so sorry, mother. I’m so sorry.”

She shushed her and embraced Y/N in a tight hug, trying to soothe her as much as she could. “It’s alright, darling. You shouldn’t have to apologize for being a child.”

“Why can’t you come with me?” she asked desperately. “You’ll be safe too.”

“I have to stay back to make sure that you’re safe on the other side as well,” Kura reassured. She knew that if her daughter disappeared right before she was supposed to be punished, it would only serve to anger Ozai more. If she left alongside her, Kura was almost certain that all of the servants would be punished; if she stayed then she would be able to take full responsibility — as long as she knew her daughter was safe, Kura could weather anything.

“But I can’t do this alone,” Y/N pleaded, the tears now falling freely. “Please, mother.”

“You can, my little otter penguin. You’re braver than you even know. “ Kura pressed a kiss to her forehead and smiled faintly at her before looking back at Aiko. “Can you make sure she gets out of the palace safely?”

“Of course.”

Kura embraced her once more, squeezing so tightly that Y/N couldn’t breathe, but it was a welcome sensation this time. “I love you, Y/N. Always remember that, no matter what happens.”

Y/N nodded and shouldered her satchel, biting down on her lip hard to keep herself from shedding any more tears. “I love you too, mother. I swear, I’ll find my way back to you. I don’t care how long it takes.”

Aiko took Y/N’s hand and began urging her towards the door, looking back at her mother with nothing but pure sympathy. “I hope you know what you’re doing, Kura.”

“So do I,” she whispered.

-

Zuko knelt in front of his father, willing himself to keep his eyes on the floor as well as stop the tremors running through his body. He was in trouble, he had to be for a meeting like this, but all he could think about was Y/N and how much trouble she would be in. He had to figure out some way to save her—

“Prince Zuko.” Ozai’s voice boomed throughout the hall, and he worked to maintain the mask of stoicism. It was near impossible with the countless thoughts bouncing around in his head, but he somehow managed. “I’m sure you know why I have called you in here tonight.”

He counted in his head the seconds passed for an appropriate pause before answering cautiously. “No, father. I’m not aware of the reason for this.”

“Don’t lie so blatantly to my face,” he spat. “I have eyes everywhere, and I know you were in the city without permission. Am I correct?”

Zuko swallowed the sudden lump in his throat and nodded shakily. “Yes, father, you are. I went into the city today with—”

“With a servant girl?” The flames on either side of him flared up as a result of his growing anger. “I would ask what was going through your head when you decided to do something so stupid, but it doesn’t seem like anything is going on up there.”

“She needed silks for a project she was working on,” he said, trying in vain to defend himself. “She didn’t have the materials that she needed so I thought I would take her out into the city to help her.” It was so much more than that, but Zuko feared for what would happen if his father knew the feelings he harbored for her.

“You are the crown prince,” Ozai growled. “It is not your job to help servants. You should know better than to go prancing around with Water Tribe savages, but I suppose I have to teach you a lesson.”

“Please, don’t—“ Zuko began, but he was cut off yet again.

“You will speak when spoken to,” he interrupted through gritted teeth. “If you won’t take such a coveted position seriously, then I will take it into my own hands. I will not have your feelings ruining the image of this family after how hard I have worked. The Water Tribe peasant will suffer severe consequences, and it will be your fault. This will be your lesson to remember just who you are. Nothing in this world comes without a cost."

Zuko felt his heart stop for just a moment as his father’s golden eyes bore into his own, and he dug his nails into the flesh of his palm in a half-hearted attempt to stay calm. “Father, is this really necessary?”

“The mere fact that you are questioning my decision proves that it is,” Ozai seethed. “This is not your choice to make, and every attempt in undermining my authority will make her suffer more. Do you understand?”

He found himself unable to speak, the horror of the situation still processing in his head. Y/N was going to get hurt, possibly killed, and it was all his fault. He should’ve been more careful, he shouldn’t have been around her at all, he was being completely selfish by wanting her company and now his father was going to—

“I will not repeat myself again; do you understand?”

Zuko inhaled sharply and nodded, his vision coming back into focus as he croaked out a “yes”.

Ozai appeared less than satisfied, but it seemed the extended company of his son was not worth worming a better answer out of him. He directed his attention to the guard waiting by the door. “Take him back to his quarters — station two guards outside to ensure that he stays put. Once you are done, find the savage and throw her in a cell. A night in the cold will loosen her tongue. You are dismissed.”

Zuko felt numb as he pulled himself up from the floor, bowed, and walked out of the throne room with the guard. Every fibre of his being screamed at him to break away from the guard, to run and find Y/N, and take her away from this dreaded place before any harm could come to her.

But he didn’t. He remained in place, following the guard silently to his room as a storm brewed in his mind.

What in Agni’s name had he pulled her into?

-

Prince Zuko doesn’t sleep a wink that night, spending every moment staring out the window with wide eyes and a petrified heart. He has no idea how Y/N is going to get out of this, and he feels like a coward for not being able to protect her. What good is any kind of honor if this was the cost?

The next day, he is forced to be with a guard at all times — he doesn’t catch a single glimpse of the waterbender.

The next day, the rest of the week, a month — no sign of her. He tries to find Kura, but is met with the same result. He manages to sneak his way into the prison, but he can’t even find her there. None of the other servants will tell him anything about their whereabouts, either out of fear that the same will happen to them or direct orders from his father.

He feels like he’s tainted, like he only brings pain to those around him. His mother gone, his love missing, dead, or worse, and the same for her mother. The effortless cruelty his father shows to everyone around him — it makes him wonder if that’s what will become of him when he eventually takes the throne.

It makes Zuko sick, to think of what she went through and that he was the cause of it. It takes everything in him to hold the tears back, but the floodgates open at night when he is alone — with Y/N gone, he feels that way more often than not.

Every sign points to her being dead, but Zuko prays to every spirit he knows that she somehow found a way out.

-

Y/N doesn’t sleep either that night, every breath and every step dedicated to getting farther away from the palace. Every sound she hears sends tremors through her body, expecting every cracked branch or bump in the night to be someone coming to finish the job. More than once she questions what in Tui’s name is she doing, and Y/N knows that her mother’s final words are the only reason she is able to get through this.

She feels like a coward for leaving. Her mother is going to bear the consequences, and it’s more than likely other servants will suffer because of her too. And Zuko — she has no idea what is going to happen to him. He may be the crown prince, but title has never stopped Ozai before. She doubts it will stop him now. Knowing that it won’t last is the only comfort — she’s just a servant; punishment will only be inflicted to make an example out of the situation and then it will be left alone.

At least, that’s what she hopes for.

Y/N tells herself that she will reunite with Zuko no matter the cost. No matter how long it takes, how much she has to go through, even if she has to break into the damn palace — she knows that her story with the prince is not over, even if she has to keep writing it herself.

She will see him again. Y/N knows that much.

-

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