#because i love halloween! but i put maybe a little too much pressure on it
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kanerallels · 1 year ago
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Listen I absolutely love autumn but the only down side is that every year I absolutely lose my mind over who to be for Halloween
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aesthetic-day-dream · 2 months ago
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I was planning on keeping this away from this blog, seeing as I want to use it as an escape and a place of good, but l've been so anxious and scared and mad about the current state of the world that I just need to rant about it.
This may sound ignorant or delusional, I don't know anymore, but l'm really hoping we end up okay. I've been telling myself that there's still a lot of good in this world. Good things are happening every day, but they don't get as much traction as bad things do in the news.
News media has become more and more focused on only spreading the bad over the years and I just refuse to believe that the bad outweighs the good. Call me childish, I don't care.
I feel as though I can't pray for answers because I don't feel as though I'm being heard anymore. I hope I'm wrong. I want to grow up. I want to get a head full of gray hair. I want to experience life and everything that comes with it. I want to find love. I want to buy my own house. I want to decorate said house with all the stupid, small little things that make me happy. I want to decorate for Halloween and Christmas. I want to see my nieces grow up and start families of their own. Aging is a privilege and it is something that I will never take for granted. I have been blessed in my life and I am eternally grateful for that. I know that others have not been as fortunate as me and my heart is entirely with them.
It’s childish to say that I wish we could all get along, but I don’t care. I have never understood the hatred that some people have for others who are different than them. We are all human beings. There has been too much hatred, bloodshed, war, and everything awful you could think of in this world. I hate that everything we stand for, everything people strain their voices for in the hopes of change goes unheard of by people in power. The people who actually have the money and ability to help our planet - the very same people who just don’t care. The money hungry, greedy politicians who make everything a political war to turn us against each other.
I just want to go outside and enjoy the weather. I want those around me to be able to do the same. Scientists have been warning us about Climate change for YEARS!!! It pisses me off more than anything that we have had the time to fix things and yet here we are. Why did no one listen?! Why didn’t they fix things before it all spiraled out of control?? Maybe this is the ignorant, delusional, hopeful part of me, but I really do believe we can fix things before it’s too late. It’s just, the people who really need to change their ways for this planet to get better just don’t care. They like to put the pressure on us, the little people, when it’s them who are the problem.
You don’t have to read this. If you did, I hope I didn’t cause you any anxiety or discomfort, but I needed to get my own feelings out.
I believe that we’ll be okay, but we need to actually take the steps to get there. I hope people start to listen, if anything good can come out of Hurricane Milton, I hope it’s that it opens peoples eyes to the traumatic state the world is currently in.
If you’re in the path of Hurricane Milton, I hope that you’re okay. If you couldn’t evacuate or stayed behind to be with your pets or loved ones or you’re a healthcare worker who stayed to help, I wish the best for you. Please stay safe💚💚💚
I’m not sure if I will see any damage from Milton yet, I’m hoping we will be okay. I’ll update later if anyone cares to know. Be safe out there! 💚
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sogoodtoheritsvicious · 2 months ago
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it’s tiiiiimeee
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i haven’t watched this show in full in five years 😵‍💫but it’s october and i was gonna watch thee byeler episode aka 2x02 on halloween anyway so i thought i might as well rewatch the entire show and make it everyone’s problem
forgot about the jumpscare being right at the beginning
baby will <3
they were all BABIES and now they’re all grown and the damn final season still hasn’t premiered lmao
dustin was so adorable
“it was a seven.” “huh?” “the roll, it was a seven. the demogorgon, it got me.” the way will was incapable of lying to mike, GOD, i feel sick
fun fact: will’s adorable little “see you tomorrow!” is immediately what made him my favorite
“kiss your mom ‘night for me!” lmfao
forgot how damn good the jumpscares are
gonna need mike to see will with a gun at least once before this show is over
“damn,you look like hell, chief!” “oh, yeah? well, i looked better than your wife when i left her this morning.” HELP
“lonnie used to call him queer.” “is he?” FUCKING HELL, HOPPER 😭 i completely forgot about that scene lmfao
EL, MY BABY
benny was such a good man :( he didn’t deserve to die
that poor dog was so hated irl 😭
“you think we got a problem here?” my brother in christ, a boy is missing
“i’m the only one that cares about will!” mike loves will so much, i’m gonna cry
i completely forgot about hop’s daughter
mike sneaking out while steve’s sneaking in 😭 this show is also a comedy
winona ryder the actress that you are
chapter 2
maybe i’m going to find out in this ep i can’t remember if they ever investigate benny’s death or link it to everything else that was going on
“stop it, you’re freaking her out!” “she’s freaking ME out!” lucas was the only real one in the beginning
poor baby. el didn’t even know what privacy was before this moment.
“oh, you can speak!” she gets that a lot 😭
mike and el had so much potential as friends, FUCK the duffers for ruining them by making it romantic. now they don’t even seem like they like each other
i hope s5 focuses on more on will and lucas’ friendship
jonathan was such a good brother
brenner. always at the scene of the fucking crime.
mike naming his dino ‘rory’ because he roars 🥹
FUCK BRENNER ALL MY HOMIES HATE BRENNER
karen was such a good mom in the beginning
i hate lonnie with a passion, he’s an abusive piece of shit who should’ve been killed off
i don’t blame lucas at all for the way he was acting with el at first
“one kid goes missing, the other one runs wild? some real fine parenting right there.”
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they kept pointing out so many similarities between will and el, i can’t believe they didn’t go anywhere with it
“can’t ask a corpse a question.” die. just die.
nancy: *losing her virginity*
barb: *losing her life*
chapter 3
“no one breaks in here.” yeah, they just break out
love jonathan but steve wasn’t exactly wrong about the pictures
joyce byers the mother that you are
mike wanted nothing to do with el once they found will’s “body” but we’re supposed to believe that he loved her the second he saw her in the woods.
chapter 4
i can’t believe they showed that mike has all of the drawings will has created and expected us to be normal about it
“screw his funeral!” “what?!” TEARS
jonathan loves joyce and will so much 🥺
steve was such an unbearable asshole
can we PLEASE talk about charlie being able to hold his own with winona in that scene about will’s body? we already know winona’s gonna blow it out of the water but he did just as well
completely forgot about mike doing el’s makeup this episode dkfkgjd
“where are you from, exactly?” “bad place.” 😭
that troy scene still sends
“the kid is dead. end of story.”
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they put too much pressure on el. i hope when all this shit is over she’s able to just be a normal kid.
this show used to be so fucking good
i love how hop tries lying to the state trooper and when that doesn’t work he just knocks him the fuck out 😭
I FUCKING HATE LONNIE
i’m so glad they had jonathan realize that joyce was telling the truth about everything that was going on instead of just dragging it all out.
chapter 5
hate lonnie for taking advantage of joyce when she’s clearly in a vulnerable position
“wait until we tell will that jennifer hayes was crying at his funeral” lmao
all this season is showing me is how severely they’ve robbed us of joyce and will scenes in future episodes
“man, these aren’t real nilla wafers.” mr. clark must think they’re horrible friends, i’m crying. dustin is right, though, fake nilla wafers suck.
“it might even swallow us whole.” and that’s exactly what’s happening by the end of s4
“he’s wanted to go to nyu since he was six. years. old!” she should’ve killed lonnie right then & there
can’t prove it but jonathan fell in love with nancy the second she shot that can on her first try
jonathan clocked nancy’s ass BAD in the woods
forgot just how much lucas hated el this season
byeler and jancy have paralleled each other too many times for it to just mean nothing in the end.
chapter 6
the jumpscares in this show are top tier
what i love about this show is how it still has me holding my breath even though i already know what’s going to happen
“i don’t wanna be alone. do you?” “no.” i was gonna say he wouldn’t be alone cause joyce is there but i remembered he doesn’t wanna tell her til it’s all over
early jancy were so awkward, i love them <3
“i could have been killed!” “which is exactly why we need her. she’s a weapon!” but mike loves her at this point, right?
lucas loves will so much, it’s a shame we haven’t seen much more of their friendship
“you’re my best friend, too.” “okay :D” dustin looked so happy 😭
“what’s the weirdest part? me or the bear trap?” “you, definitely you.” pls
jonathan beating the shit out of steve was so satisfying
“only love makes you that crazy, sweetheart.” i’m not even gonna say anything. you all know.
we don’t give mike enough appreciation for being such a selfless person. he did everything he could to find will, he almost killed himself to protect dustin, he let el live in his basement without even knowing her, etc.
“she’s our friend and she’s crazy!” i love dustin with my whole heart
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BABIES 🫶🏼
chapter 7
“if anyone asks where i am, i’ve left the country.” this season is really reminding me why mike was my favorite in the beginning
i wanna hug el so bad
“our son with a girl?” ted, to mike:
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“a psychotic child broke his arm!” “a little girl, chief. a little one.” “that tone! do you hear that tone?” “honestly, i’m just trying to state a fact. it was a little girl.” this entire exchange is sending me so bad
“you couldn’t take jonathan byers.” get his ass!
it was such a great choice to have joyce be the first one to ever give el comfort because she’s such a soft, comforting person and i can’t think of anyone better
chapter 8
made it to the finale! gonna be honest, i didn’t think i’d get here in only two days but this show sucked me in the exact way it did the first time
“go to hell.” joyce is everything
waiting til this episode to give flashbacks on hop’s daughter was an excellent choice
steve just wanted to apologize to jonathan and now he’s an exasperated mother of seven. life comes at ya quick!!
choosing not to acknowledge that scene beyond this for the sake of my mental health
el is a badass but she shouldn’t have to be
brenner should’ve never made it to season 4
these kids acted their ASSES off in this show
GOD THIS JOYCE, HOPPER AND WILL SCENE
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you’d think everything that went down would make nancy and karen care more about mike and pay attention to him but it doesn’t. mike deserves so much better.
will is in a hospital bed worrying about jonathan’s hand. I LOVE THIS KID.
byeler hug <3
they all really wanted to tell will about jennifer hayes crying 😭
“her name’s eleven.” “like the number?” he sounded baffled lmaooo
getting will back must’ve been so bittersweet for nancy
hop keeps throwing away lit cigarettes and all i keep thinking is that he’s gonna start a wildfire eventually
mike’s soft ‘see you, will’ 🥹
the camera!!
“your wife doesn’t have time to cook for me.” pls
the byers family 🫶🏼
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my love for this show has officially been revived. rewatching this reminded me why i loved this show so much in the first place. the acting is amazing, especially from the kids, the writing was great, and the fucking jumpscares were incredible. i’m so excited to start season 2!!
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taylor-on-your-dash · 2 years ago
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Writing of Speak Now Timeline
Disclaimer: Hello! Just a quick note before you dive in. As I said in the Writing of Red Timeline, not every album has enough information to pinpoint the exact date on which its songs were written. Sadly, Speak Now is one of those albums, so I based this timeline more on the experiences that I think inspired the songs on the album. Of course, I'm not Taylor, I'm not in her head and I don't know people in the music industry that can corroborate this research. Therefore, there's always the chance that some of the conclusions might be wrong. You are more than welcome to take the sources listed here and come up with your own theories on the condition that you'll credit me. This is 100% my research, originally posted on Reddit on March 3rd, 2023.
Trigger Warning: John Mayer.
Introduction: The making of Speak Now was very different from Fearless which was recorded live, and closer to Debut. After Taylor wrote a song, the first step was to record a stripped-down demo at Nathan Chapman's studio Pain In The Art, where Nathan would play all of the instruments and Taylor would record the vocals. To understand better what "stripped-down" means in this context, listen to Let's Go. All of Speak Now started like Let's Go. Some of the demo instruments survived, and others were re-recorded by other musicians or overdubbed at a later date, between January 2010 and July 2010. Taylor's demo vocals ALL survived. They were not re-recorded.
[Nathan Chapman Interview] “With Speak Now, we deliberately went back to our initial way of working together. We had an unlimited budget, and could have gone and recorded the whole album in the Bahamas, used any studio we liked and whatever musicians we wanted. But we decided to bring it back to the basics on purpose, because we wanted to keep it about the music and our chemistry. [We were trying not] to over-compensate for the pressure we were feeling for a follow-up to Fearless. That's why we stripped it down and made the demos first. Taylor came to my studio and I played all the instruments on the demos, and because I have a good vocal booth, her demo vocals ended up being the vocals you hear on the record. After finishing the demos, we went out to different studios, and tried different combinations of engineers and musicians to replace some of the elements of my demos, mostly the programmed drums, and to do additional overdubs. So Taylor comes in, and plays me a song, and I chart it while listening to her. I then tap out a tempo, she hands me her guitar, I go into a recording booth, put on headphones, start the click‑track and hit record. She's hearing what I'm doing and singing along while she's in the control room, so I know where I am in the song. After that, I program the drums, usually using Superior Drummer in Logic. I play the drum parts on my Roland Fantom G6 keyboard, and then quantise. I then play the fills that I want to complete the drum part. After this I'll put down a bass part, and at this point we make sure we're really OK with the tempo and that we love the arrangement. I may add an electric guitar to make the track bigger, and then she'll go into the vocal booth and she'll sing the song three or four times. We may do a little bit of comping, but she executes these songs really well, and I don't want to mess with her takes too much. The audience wants to hear someone sing with real emotion. From there we'll listen to what we have and we'll maybe add some vocal harmonies and guitars, and I do a quick mix and she's out of the door.”
WRITING OF SPEAK NOW TIMELINE
November 2, 2006: Taylor writes Sparks Fly, after opening for Jake Owen in Portland, OR, on Halloween night. The secret message in the album booklet is Portland, Oregon. She will perform the song for the first time on April 6, 2007, in her native Reading PA.
[From MySpace] Happy Halloween! I'm sitting at the airport in Portland, Oregon... About to get on a red-eye flight (Oh yes, I just said red-eye. Meaning, all night. This should be interesting...)  to Toronto, Canada for another weekend of Rascal Flatts shows. Tonight was awesome. It was a show in Portland at a bar called Duke's, I opened up for Jake Owen. And a little back-story, I've had his album on repeat for the past couple of months... It's an amazing album and I literally cannot stop listening to it. I've got every line memorized, and if you see me on a plane.. Chances are, I'm listening to some song off that album, at a volume level that's probably going to cause long-term hearing damage someday. ANYWAY. I got to walk in on his sound check and meet him. Turns out he's extremely cool, and had bought my album on iTunes. :-) And since I had to leave after one song of his set, he played my favorite song "8 Second Ride" first. Which is another reason why he's awesome.
The writing date was leaked by Steve Hall from the IC on July 21, 2010. Since we didn't have the secret message yet, we didn't have any reason to believe it was written after the Jake Owen show. (thanks @backup-baby-backup!)
Original handwritten lyric sheet:
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May 30, 2007: First performance of Sparks Fly in Oroville, CA. Steve Hall from the Inner Circle/Dark Blue Tennessee.com films it and posts it online.
Differences between the draft and the 2007 live version:
“You stand there in front of me” -> “you stood there in front of me”
“Get me with those brown eyes, baby” -> “get me with those green eyes, baby”
“Take your open hand and take me out” -> “reach out open-handed and lead me out”
“Dim the paper lanterns” -> “don’t need more paper lanterns”
“This night is the 31st” -> “my heart is beating fast”
“So let’s make it count now, baby” -> “I could wait patiently”
“I’ll run my fingers” -> “I run my fingers”
“And make no borderlines” -> “gonna strike this match tonight”
“Forgive me when I can’t take in everything you are” -> “and lead me up the staircase”
“You kissed me like you meant it, I swear I saw sparks” -> “I’d love to hate it, but you make it like a firework show”
There was also an additional section: We stood at the gate (and you kiss me) / With the moon on your face / And you’ll kiss me
September 2008: Taylor and Martin Johnson team up to write a diss track about Camilla Belle, called Drama Queen. This is one of the first steps in the Taylor-Joe-Camilla saga, which started with Forever & Always and Drama Queen and continued on Speak Now. There is no evidence that Drama Queen was considered for Speak Now, but for being an unreleased song, it made it as far as being mastered for the OG Fearless so it has to mean something. In my opinion, it would've taken Better Than Revenge's place, if BTR hadn't existed. Taylor talked about the Fearless mastering process on September 30th on MySpace: this song literally CANNOT be younger, since the mastering of a song is considered a legal document, necessary for copyright protection and the collection of royalties.
March 8, 2009: John Mayer tweets: "Waking up to this song idea that won't leave my head. 3 days straight now. That means it's good enough to finish. It's called Half of My Heart and I want to sing it with Taylor Swift. She would make a killer Stevie Nicks in contrast to my Tom Petty of a song."
Taylor's answer: "I freaked out when I heard [it], because I’ve been such a big fan of John for such a long time. I’m really excited about just the idea that he would even mention me in his Twitter!”
March 13, 2009: [From her Twitter] [second source] "A day off in Sydney. Drove two hours out of the city and spent the day on the beach. Wrote a chorus you'll hear on the next record. :)"
March 19, 2009: [From MySpace] ““I’m wiped out. I've been in the studio all day (I know, I know.. We JUST put out a new album. I think I have a problem, I cannot stop writing songs.) It’s so much fun knowing that you can take your time, because you have like a year and a half to make something you’re really proud of. I love recording a few songs, waiting a few months, recording a few more.. Instead of devoting a few weeks to “record the album” and then it’s just done. I like dragging it out, that way you can be meticulous about every detail. Daydream about different ways to put the songs together, and then take them apart. I’m pretty obsessed with the whole process. So needless to say, it was good to be back in the studio with my redheaded producer who I missed terribly.”
Speculation: One of the songs is possibly Mr. Perfectly Fine, since, as we know from Fearless TV, it was considered for Fearless Platinum. Maybe Haunted was also part of the same recording session. Haunted is the first Speak Now song to be copyrighted, so it has to be one of the first songs.
‘Haunted’ is about the moment that you realize the person you’re in love with is drifting and fading fast. And you don’t know what to do, but in that period of time, in that phase of love, where it’s fading out, time moves so slowly. Everything hinges on what that last text message said, and you’re realizing that he’s kind of falling out of love. That’s a really heartbreaking and tragic thing to go through, because the whole time you’re trying to tell yourself it’s not happening. I went through this, and I ended up waking up in the middle of the night writing this song about it.
The secret message is: "Still to this day".
Early April 2009: Taylor and Martin Johnson from Boys Like Girls write If This Was A Movie.
Speculation: I think it was written in April just because of the lyric "six months gone and I'm still reaching" and Taylor and Joe Jonas had broken up six months before, in October.
Literally nothing else is known about this song.
April 23, 2009: The Fearless Tour starts in Evansville, Indiana. Taylor will write most of Speak Now while on tour.
May 22, 2009: Taylor and John Mayer perform White Horse and Your Body Is A Wonderland at the LA Staples Center.
May 23, 2009: Taylor and John Mayer record Half Of My Heart.
May 29, 2009: [From MySpace] “Tomorrow, after the performance on the Today show, I’ll fly back to Nashville and record a lot of new songs I’ve written in the last few weeks.
June 8, 2009: [From Twitter] "In the studio. I don't know whose computer I'm using. Pssh.. Such a rebel right now.."
June 9, 2009: [From Twitter] "If I said I was in the studio with T-Pain, would you believe me?"
June 12, 2009: American publishes an interview with Taylor where she talks about her third album. The interview was probably done in April.
“There are definitely breakup songs on this record, but not too many. I like to balance out the amount of happy songs, breakup songs, sentimental songs, I-miss-you songs, angry songs. I don’t want to try and harp on the same emotion too much because I feel like if you make the ‘angry’ album, that’s going to lose people.”
June 16, 2009: the Jonas Brothers release their new album Lines, Vines and Trying Times, which includes a song called Much Better, that references Taylor:
I get a rep for breaking hearts / Now, I'm done with superstars / And all the tears on her guitar
This is likely the song that inspires Taylor to write Better Than Revenge, since the phrase "much better" is used multiple times in the song.
“The song "Better Than Revenge" is about a girl, who a few years ago, stole my boyfriend. I think she probably thought I forgot about it, but I didn't.”
Fun Fact: Joe Jonas changed the lyrics from "I'm done with superstars" to "I'm cool with superstars".
July 1, 2009: [From MySpace] “What else is new... Recording a bunch of new songs.”
One of them is possibly Better Than Revenge, maybe even Let's Go. Taylor seems still bitter about Joe leaving her.
July 11, 2009: Taylor writes on her diary about going to an antique shop. This is probably the inspiration for Timeless.
[Lover Journal] I just got back from a trip to Canada that was absolutely refreshing and good for the soul. I never really knew what a good thing having no cell or internet could be. But it was a great thing. I did things a little differently up there, and I actually liked it. I started reading self-help books. It’s really uplifting knowing that you can change your life today, tomorrow … just by doing a few things you never thought of. Or doing things differently than you’ve done them before. New things I adopted from a self help book: Get up early. Keep your cool. Don’t tee off on people you love. Laugh more. You can control your moods. Create a love account and make deposits, in other words, show people that you love them. Another new hobby of mine is ….. antique stores. And not just neat, organized antique stores. I really like the ones where there’s so much crap to dig through, you can find absolute treasures for nothing. I went to 2 antique stores in Saskatchewan, and one today in Winnipeg. I bought all these old glass mason jars. I’m gonna use them for candle holders. I bought old scales and watch faces and chairs and old trunks and a bird cage and 2 lamps.
July 21, 2009: [From Twitter] Hanging with my producer Nathan, discussing the next adventure. Album #3.
July 2009: Based on a Lover Journal, I think that Taylor wrote Never Grow Up in July 2009.
Handwritten Lyrics From a Lover Journal:
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‘Never Grow Up’ is a song about the fact that I don’t quite know how I feel about growing up. It’s tricky. Growing up happens without you knowing it. Growing up is such a crazy concept because a lot of times when you were younger you wish you were older. I look out into a crowd every night and I see a lot of girls that are my age and going through exactly the same things as I’m going through. Every once in a while I look down and I see a little girl who is seven or eight, and I wish I could tell her all of this. There she is becoming who she is going to be and forming her thoughts and dreams and opinions. I wrote this song for those little girls.
[Nathan Chapman Interview] “The song 'Never Grow Up' is just she singing and I on acoustic guitar. We recorded ourselves live. That song probably happened in two hours.”
September 6, 2009: Taylor announces Fearless Platinum Edition on MySpace, out on October 26, 2009. It includes Jump Then Fall, which was originally written in the summer of 2008, while Taylor was dating Joe Jonas. The secret message of the song is "Last Summer Was Magical". It seems like Taylor doesn't harbor bitter feelings toward Joe anymore.
“We just put out Fearless last year? I know! We’re not putting out a whole new album. We’re re-releasing Fearless with SIX new songs added. I’m so excited for you to hear this new music, see the new pictures, and watch the 50 million hours of bonus content. I love you a lot and I’ll see you on the road!”
September 13, 2009: New York. Night of the VMA incident, where Kanye West interrupts Taylor while she's accepting the Best Music Video Award for You Belong With Me. Taylor starts writing Innocent shortly after.
Based on the themes of the song and on the fact that, according to the booklet, it was written in 2009, I think that Castles Crumbling was also inspired by the VMA incident.
[GQ] “When the crowd started booing, I thought they were booing because they also believed I didn’t deserve the award. That’s where the hurt came from. I went backstage and cried, and then I had to stop crying and perform five minutes later. I just told myself I had to perform, and I tried to convince myself that maybe this wasn’t that big of a deal. But that was the most happenstance thing to ever happen in my career.”
September 15, 2009 (morning): Taylor is still in New York doing interviews, like The View with Whoopy Goldberg. Taylor says that she bought her own condo in Nashville. Unsurprisingly, the main topic is the VMA incident.
September 15, 2009 (night): Taylor attends Owl City's show in New York. She and Adam Young (aka Owl City) had exchanged emails in the previous months. She writes Enchanted after their meeting.
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[MTV Interview] “I started writing that in the hotel room when I got back, because it was just this positive, wistful feeling of ‘I hope you understand just how much I loved meeting you.’ Using the word ‘wonderstruck’ [in the lyrics] was done on purpose, because that’s a word which that person used one time in an e-mail... so I purposely wrote it in the song, so he would know.”
[Adam Young Interview] When Young met the 21-year-old music superstar backstage at one of his shows in New York, he was starstruck. "She was on her way up to meet me and that was the most nerve-racking few minutes of my life just waiting to meet Taylor Swift," he says. "When I met her she was glowing and I was too. It's hard to put into words, but I was definitely wonderstruck to meet her." Unfortunately for Young, nothing ever progressed beyond emails and one fateful meeting. "I think I'm not the most romantic and eloquent guy in the world," he admits. "She's just this endearing, wonderful girl and maybe I said something wrong. Who knows. It went on for three or four months, something like that."
Speculation: I think that the first verse of Enchanted is a reference to the View interview that Taylor did that morning.
September 26, 2009: While touring in Little Rock, Arkansas, with Kellie Pickler and Gloriana, Taylor writes a song, possibly Last Kiss.
“The song ‘Last Kiss’ is sort of like a letter to somebody. You say all of these desperate, hopeless feelings that you have after a break-up. Going through a break-up you feel all of these different things. You feel anger, and you feel confusion, and frustration. Then there is the absolute sadness. The sadness of losing this person, losing all the memories, and the hopes you had for the future. There are times when you have this moment of truth where you just admit to yourself that you miss all these things. When I was in one of those moments I wrote this song.”
[Drummer Nick Buda on the recording of Last Kiss, recorded in mid 2010 circa] On "Last Kiss," South African-born Nick Buda said there was an air of real excitement when they were recording the album. “She is awesome to work with and super-appreciative of her players. There was a real chemistry involved in this record.” Their desire to get exactly the sound they wanted extended to changing Buda’s modern drum kit to a vintage one on some choruses in order to get a different tone from some of the bombastic “teenage rock band” sound. “The songs were so well written that very rarely did they go past a third take,” he said.
The secret message is "Forever And Always".
October 17, 2009: [From Twitter] Travis: you look so out of it. Me: I'm writing a song in my head. Travis: oh, I apologize. I didn't realize you were working."
November 7, 2009: Taylor sings "Monologue Song (La La La) at the SNL, where she mentions her breakup with Joe and dating Taylor Lautner.
November 30, 2009: Taylor tweets: “If I had a dime for every time my producer and I blurt out the same thing at the same time, followed by an awkward, uncoordinated high five...”
Late November/Early December 2009: Taylor writes Ours and possibly Superman. Maybe they're the songs Taylor was talking about in the tweet.
[People Country] “I wrote [Ours] when I was about to turn 20. I was in a relationship I knew people wouldn't approve of and it was just a matter of time before everyone found out. When you're first getting to know someone, it's a fragile time, and then you add newspapers and magazine covers and it can get kind of rough. I wanted to have this song to play for him when it got difficult. Singing it for him was one of the sweetest moments I can remember. [I won't say who inspired it], to me, the song says something bigger, which is "I love you, and I don't care what anyone else thinks."”
(About Ours) “I’m excited about telling the beginnings of stories, like the story of this song called ‘Ours,’ where I wrote it about this guy nobody thought I should be with. So I wrote this song specifically just to play it for him, just to show him, ‘I don’t care what anyone says. I don’t care that you have tattoos. I don’t care that you have a gap between your teeth. I love you for who you are.’ And that song ended up actually making it on [Speak Now] and becoming a #1 song.”
That's how Taylor broke down the lyrics for People in April 2012:
“Seems like there’s always someone who disapproves” -> "I felt like I was on a tightrope. I knew that falling in love with the wrong person could freak people out."
“So don’t you worry your pretty little mind” -> "A lot of people have pretty little heads, but it's difficult to find a pretty little mind."
“People throw rocks at things that shine” -> "I kind of made up the phrase. It has a nursery rhyme feel, which I like."
“The stakes are high, the water's rough” -> "Those are the first lines that came to me."
“Lurking in the shadows with their lip gloss smiles” -> "It stereotypes girls who that pretend they're happy for your and are not."
“I'll fight their doubt and give you faith with this song for you” -> "My realization of what we were up against came out in that line. I was desperate to make it work."
“Cause I love the gap between your teeth” -> "My favorite part of the song. It's symbolic of "I love your idiosyncrasies."
“And any snide remarks from my father about your tattoos” -> "My dad thinks that this line is hilarious. He loves to tease me."
[About Superman] “This is about, well, a guy, as usual. This was a guy that I was sort of enamored with. This song got its title by something that I just said randomly in conversation. When he walked out of the room, I turned to one of my friends and said, ‘It’s like watching Superman fly away.’”
Dear John's secret message is "I Loved You From The Very First Day", which is a line from Superman.
The song also includes the line "Wishing the flowers were from you", which may or may not be the same flowers mentioned in Back To December ("You gave me roses and I left them there to die").
Gossip Speculation: This makes me think that Taylor was never deeply in love with Taylor L (-> "And I realised I loved you in the fall") and she left Taylor L for John Mayer (-> "And if you'd never saved me from boredom, I would've gone on as I was")
December 6, 2009: [From MySpace] “I just got back to Nashville this morning after being in LA all week. Today I was out and about and in the studio all day...”
December 11, 2009: Taylor and John Mayer perform Half Of My Heart at the Z100 Jingle Bell Ball concert in New York. After this concert, rumors of them dating surface.
December 13, 2009: Taylor turns 20.
December 22, 2009: [From Twitter] "I was writing a song and my pen fell into the piano. Still trying to figure out if I should do anything about this."
January 11, 2010: [From Twitter] "Studio-ness with all the same boys who played on Fearless. Home-made cupcakes were brought. Awkward fist-pumps happened. Onward!"
January 13, 2010: [From MySpace] Thank you January. I have had this month off. [...] I've written songs on napkins and sat at a giant table with my whole family on my mother's birthday, all of us in one place for the first time in too long. I've gotten to take what has happened to me and process it to my full capability, and celebrate it the way it deserved to be celebrated. I've made new music. I've gone over the memories and jumped up and down with my producer and floated around with nothing on my schedule other than just appreciating what my life has somehow turned into. So thank you for giving me so much to be thankful for this January. Thank you beyond what I know how to say.
[From Twitter] "More recording. So excited. So excited. So excited. See, I said that three times. Once for every album we've made in this studio."
[Music News.com Interview] “The weirdest place I have ever written a song is probably in an airport, and I got an idea so fast that I had to run to the bathroom at the airport, grab a paper towel and write lyrics on the paper towel. I still have it. I still have it in a box in my room.”
“Getting back in the studio with the same guys I trust and know and love.. (right, the pointing one: my producer Nathan Chapman) (Left, the waving one: Bass extraorinaire, Tim Marks. Clearly marked on his road case.) Nick Buddha is in charge of the drums.”
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January 2010: It's possible that one of the songs recorded during the January session was Speak Now.
[MTV Interview] "One of my friends... the guy she had been in love with since childhood was marrying this other girl," she said. "And my first inclination was to say, 'Well, are you gonna speak now?' And then I started thinking about what I would do if I was still in love with someone who was marrying someone who they shouldn't be marrying. And so I wrote this song about exactly what my game plan would be."
“This song was inspired by one of my friends who was telling me about her childhood sweetheart, crush guy. They were kind of together in high school and went their separate ways, and it was kind of understood that they were gonna get back together. Then, she one day comes in and tells me he’s getting married. He had met this girl who was just this mean person who made him completely stop talking to all of his friends, cut off his family, had him like so completely isolated. And I just, kind of randomly, was like, ‘So, you gonna speak now?’ She was like, ‘What do you mean?’ And I was like ‘Oh, you know, like storm the church, speak now or forever hold your peace? I’ll go with you. I’ll play guitar. It would be great.’ She was just kind of laughing, and later on I just was wrapping my mind around that idea of how tragic it would be if someone you loved was marrying somebody else. Later I had a dream about one of my ex-boyfriends getting married, and it just all came together that I needed to write this song about interrupting a wedding.”
The secret message for Speak Now is “You always regret what you don’t say.”
In January 2010, things are starting to get serious. Taylor, Nathan and the rest of the group, are at the Starstruck Recording Studio to finish up some songs.
Mid January 2010: In a Rolling Stone interview, Taylor confirms she has already recorded some songs.
“‘I’ll be moving out, living on my own, experiencing relationships,’ she says. ‘All of that will be documented in sort of a photo-album-slash-diary, which will be this next record.’ I’ve written so much for this next record and recorded a bunch of songs already, but I don’t want to give away any of the titles – it’s still too early in the process. I don’t really write for albums as much as I just write for my life and process what I feel, whether that feeling is resentment or hope or happiness or a crush — writing songs helps me get through those moments.”
January 31, 2010: Taylor wins her first AOTY for Fearless at the 52nd Grammy Awards.
February 1, 2010: Bob Lefsetz posts his particularly negative review of her performance with Stevie Nicks at the Grammy's. Mean was likely written shortly after.
“When you do what I do, which is you put yourself out there for a lot of people to say whatever they want about it, there are a million different opinions from a million different people. I get it that not everyone is going to like everything that you do, and I get that no matter what, you’re going to be criticized for something. But I also get that there are different kinds of ways to criticize someone. There is constructive criticism. There’s professional criticism. And then, there’s just being mean. There’s a line that you cross when you just start to attack everything about a person, and there’s one guy who just crossed the line over and over again. Just being mean, and saying things that would ruin my day. […] There’s always going to be someone who’s just mean to you. Dealing with that is all you can control about that situation, how you handle it. ‘Mean’ is about how I handle it, and sort of my mindset about this whole situation.”
"There's a song called 'Mean,' that I guess you could categorize it into feelings and or relationships but it's actually about a critic."
In a later interview with 60 Minutes, Swift revealed that the critic was someone who attacked her performance with Stevie Nicks at the 52nd Grammy Awards, where she sang off-key.
February 3, 2010: Taylor writes Mean.
[InDemand] "There's a song on the record called Mean. I remember I started writing it sitting on my kitchen counter, just playing it. Then I took a plane and flew to the venue where we were gonna play that night, and finishing it in the dressing room.
I'm inferring the date but Taylor went to Australia on February 4th, so that's the closest date to the Bob Lefsetz's post. Alternatively, the other closest date is February 17th.
February 4, 2010: John Mayer is interviewed for Rolling Stone, and a friend of his says: "Nothing is what it seems. He operates in layers of meaning, where a poop joke is so much more than a poop joke. And he’d be a phenomenal chess player, because he knows all the moves so many steps ahead. That’s just how he operates.” (-> "And I lived in your chess game, but you changed the rules every day.")
February 5, 2010: Josh Farro from Paramore announces his engagement. Since he specifies that some people already knew about it, it is safe to assume that Hailey Williams, his ex-girlfriend and bandmate, knew before this date about it. Taylor's interviews imply that they were talking about the engagement, not the wedding.
I've got some news to share with you guys so here it goes... As some of you already know, I am engaged! So, as weird as it is to stay behind, I need to take some time off to plan the wedding and everything.
February 11, 2010: Taylor Lautner's birthday. Taylor doesn't call him, as she confessed in Back To December.
February 13, 2010: Based on a Lover Journal entry from this day, it seems like Taylor and John were no longer dating. Dear John must've been written around this period.
[Lover Journal, Flight from Adelaide to Nashville]: “My horoscope said today someone new is going to come into the picture and change my life in an exciting way. PLUS, its the 13th so it has to be true. Right? Right Well, I don't see it happening in the form of meeting someone. Maybe I'll get an email or a call. From someone fantastic and life changing. Or maybe I won't. That's more likely. I've been obsessing over the new album. I always do that until it's just right. I don't know if I have the formula just right for this one yet. I know there are great songs. I just need to figure out the strands that bond them together into a great album. And I will obsess until it's there. This album, any album, is the next 2 years of my life. It has to be more than amazing. It has to be great enough to keep MY attention for 2 years.”
“The song ‘Dear John’ is sort of like the last email you would ever send to someone that you used to be in a relationship with. Usually people write this venting last email to someone and they say everything that they want to say to that person, and then they usually don’t send it. I guess by putting this song on the album I am pushing send.”
February 22, 2010: [From MySpace] “I’ve been writing lots of songs.”
March 10, 2010: Taylor writes Mine.
[InDemand] "I wrote Mine somewhere on the road, I think in Texas, actually."
According to three different Reddit sources, Taylor was dating a non famous guy from Belmont University. The coffee shop referenced in Mine is a coffee shop in Austin, TX, by the water called Mozart's.
“This is a situation where a guy that I just barely knew put his arm around me by the water, and I saw the entire relationship flash before my eyes, almost like a weird science-fiction movie. After I wrote the song, things sort of fell apart, as things so often do. And I hadn’t talked to him in a couple months. And the song came out, and that day, I got an e-mail from him. And I was like, ‘Yes!’ Because that one was sort of half-confession and half-prediction or projection of what I saw.”
“Lately I’ve had this bad habit of running away from love. Kind of getting to the place where it’s about to commit, and then you just, like, run in the opposite direction. ‘Mine’ is about the idea that I could find someone who would be the exception to that, someone who would be so sturdy and so much of a sure thing that I wouldn’t run from it. Sometimes I look back on a lot of examples that I’ve seen of love, long term, and a lot of times it doesn’t work out. There are goodbyes and people get really hurt, so I tend to be a little ‘run-awayish.’ But I’m never past hoping that at some point that could change. This song is the first single because it has this… There was this moment between Nathan [Chapman] and I, my producer, when I brought this song in and when we made this demo in one day in his basement and we just kinda looked at each other and we were like, ‘This is it. This is the one.’”
[Nathan Chapman interview] “The demo for 'Mine' took less than five hours to record, and sounded almost identical to the record. After that we worked on the track for another four months, off and on [until July], and spent $30,000 to make sure it sounded perfect in the real world.”
[Scott Borchetta Billboard Interview] "Mine" was a turning point in the album’s development. Swift and Chapman had begun recording new songs almost as soon as "Fearless" was released. The two cut demos in his basement studio and would only take those songs to larger facilities once they felt they had an emotional foundation in the basic tracks. Still, it wasn’t until early 2010 when the album truly began to coalesce. Swift presented "Mine" to Borchetta in his office, just a few doors down the hall from the leather couch in the lobby.
"We probably played that song four or five times," Borchetta recalls. "I’m jumping around playing air guitar, she’s singing the song back to me, and it was just one of those crazy, fun, Taylor teen-age moments." And then it got serious. "I said, ‘Keep going,’ " Borchetta says. "She kind of looked at me like, ‘You’re challenging me.’ And I said, ‘Yeah. You���ve found true north here. Keep going.’"
Taylor will talk about being challenged by Borchetta to write more for Speak Now during the Red Era:
“During Speak Now, when I went to (label head) Scott Borchetta and said, 'The album's finished,' he said, 'No, it's not -- you need to keep writing.'”
Early March 2010: According to Scott Borchetta, shortly after he challenged Taylor to write more, she finishes writing Innocent, which she had started 6 months prior.
"Innocent," written after the VMA incident with Kanye West, for example, didn't come to Swift quickly. "Some songs take 30 minutes to write, and some take six months, which was the case with 'Innocent.'
“It took a while to write that song," Swift says. "That was a huge, intense thing in my life that resonated for a long time. It was brought up to me in grocery stores and everywhere I went, and in a lot of times in my life, when I don’t know how I feel about something, I say nothing. And that’s what I did until I could come to the conclusion that I came to in order to write ‘Innocent,’ " she says. "Even then, I didn’t talk about it, and I still don’t really talk about it. I just thought it was very important for me to sing about it.”
March 24, 2010: Taylor has lunch with Taylor Lautner. This meeting is likely what inspires Back To December. (thanks to @backup-baby-backup for locating the article)
[Interview Clip] Transcript: “‘Back To December’ is a song that addresses a first for me, in that I’ve never apologized to someone in a song before. This is about a person who was incredible to me- just perfect in a relationship, and I was really careless with him. So, this is a song full of words that I would say to him that he deserves to hear.”
[CBS Interview] She explained in the interview that she based the song on a conversation she had with the guy about whom she's singing. "It's not loosely based," she revealed. "It's almost word-for-word. It is a song and a conversation that needed to happen, because I don't want to hurt people. If you unintentionally do so, you've got to make that better."
April 3, 2010: Paramore's member Josh Farro marries Jenna Rice. Taylor attends the ceremony. She also goes to the studio in the morning.
[From Twitter] "Nathan you smell really good! Is that a new cologne?" "Thanks! Actually it's a two in one shampoo and soap. From Dial." My producer rules."
April 13, 2010: Taylor comes up with the title "Speak Now" after Scott Borchetta rejects "Enchanted". She also writes in her journal about getting tired of songs.
[From a Lover Journal] “So I've been obsessing over the new records to the point where it's all I can focus on. I'm majorly stressed and borderline losing it, with all these lists and chronic dissatisfaction. Perfectionist-ness. I keep growing tired of songs because I know I've raised the bar and I can beat half of the songs. Scott and I had lunch the other day. We were talking about the record and I had this epiphany. I didn't talk about it in interviews about how I felt about much of what has happened in the last 2 years. I've been silent about so much that I'm saying on this album. It's time to Speak Now. Scott freaked out. He loved it. We have a title, ladies and gentlemen!”
[Scott Borchetta Interview] “At one point, the record was not called ‘Speak Now.’ It was called ‘Enchanted,'” Big Machine president/CEO Scott Borchetta said. “We were at lunch, and she had played me a bunch of the new songs. I looked at her and I‘m like, ‘Taylor, this record isn’t about fairy tales and high school anymore. That’s not where you’re at. I don’t think the record should be called ‘Enchanted.'” Swift excused herself from the table at that point. By the time she came back, she had the “Speak Now” title, which comes closer to representing the evolution that the album represents in her career and in her still-young understanding of the world.
June 5, 2010: End of the Fearless Tour. Around this week, Taylor writes Long Live, scrabbling the chorus in her journal.
“This song is about my band, and my producer, and all the people who have helped us build this brick by brick. The fans, the people who I feel that we are all in this together, this song talks about the triumphant moments that we’ve had in the last two years. We’ve had times where we just jump up and down, and dance like we don’t care how we’re dancing, and just scream at the top of our lungs, “How is this happening?” And, I feel very lucky to even have had one of those moments, nonetheless all the ones that I got to have. ‘Long Live’ is about how I feel reflecting on it. This song for me is like looking at a photo album of all the award shows, and all the stadium shows, and all the hands in the air in the crowd. It’s sort of the first love song that I’ve written to my team.”
“"Long Live," (in parentheses "We Will Be Remembered"), is the first song where I've ever had parentheses in the title. Besides that, though, this song is about my band, and my producer, and all the people who have helped us build this brick by brick. The fans, the people who I feel that we are all in this together, this song talks about the triumphant moments that we've had in the last two years. We've had times where we just jump up and down, and dance like we don't care how we're dancing, and just scream at the top of our lungs, "How is this happening?" And, I feel very lucky to even have had one of those moments, nonetheless all the ones that I got to have. "Long Live" is about how I feel reflecting on it. This song for me is like looking at a photo album of all the award shows, and all the stadium shows, and all the hands in the air in the crowd. It's sort of the first love song that I've written to my team.”
June 9, 2010: Night of the CMT Music Awards, held in Nashville. 'CMT Music Awards' is the secret message of The Story Of Us.
“‘The Story of Us’ is about running into someone I had been in a relationship with at an awards show, and we were seated a few seats away from each other. I just wanted to say to him, ‘Is this killing you? Because it’s killing me.’ But I didn’t. But I couldn’t. Because we both had these silent shields up. I went home and I sat there at the kitchen table and I said to my mom, ‘I felt like I was standing alone in a crowded room.’ Then I got up and ran into my bedroom, as she’s seen me do many times. And she probably assumed I had come up with a line in the song.”
“'The Story of Us' is a song that I wrote about an awkward situation where, well… Let me just preface by saying that I have happened to run into exes in strange places lately. This is about one of those situations where the strange place that I ran into him was an awards show. I was seated a couple of seats away from him and there was so much that needed to be said, and neither one of us was willing to say it. We were both acting like we were engaged in conversations with people that we don't even know. It was just miserable. I was telling my Mom about it later, and I said I felt like I was standing alone in a crowded room. And then I was like, "Gotta go. Bye!" And my Mom is used to that at this point so, that's what this song is about.”
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June 13, 2010: Taylor premiers Mine during the 13-hour Meet & Greet at the CMA Music Festival. Fans ask a lot of questions about Sparks Fly.
“'Sparks Fly' is a song I wrote a few years ago and played in concert. You guys have learned it and I think like it, which makes me really happy. When we did the 13-hour Meet and Greet at the CMA Fest, there was a comment I got over and over again. You guys were saying, 'So what about 'Sparks Fly?' Is it going to be on the next record? [...] I played that song at maybe one or two shows, and you guys just jumped on it and really made it something that I had to put on the album because you really showed interest in it.”
Comparison between the 2007 live version and the final one:
First verse: You say my name for the first time, baby, and I fall in love in an empty bar -> You’re the kind of reckless that should send me runnin’, but I kinda know that I won’t get far.
Second verse: So reach out open-handed and lead me out to that floor / I don’t need more paper lanterns / Take me down, baby / Bring on the movie score / ‘Cause my heart is beating fast and you are beautiful / And I could wait patiently, but I really wish you would... -> My mind forgets to remind me you’re a bad idea / You touch me once and it’s really somethin’ / You find I’m even better than you imagined I would be / I’m on my guard for the rest of the world / But with you, I know it’s no good / And I could wait patiently, but I really wish you would…
Bridge: Just keep your beautiful eyes on me / Gonna strike this match tonight / And lead me up the staircase / Won't you whisper soft and slow / I’d love to hate it, but you make it like a firework show -> Just keep on keepin’ your eyes on me, it’s just wrong enough to make it feel right / And lead me up the staircase / Won't you whisper soft and slow / I'm captivated by you, baby I’m captivated by you baby, like a fireworks show.
Speculation: I think that the line "I'm on my guard from the rest of the world" from Sparks Fly being written after "And you figure out why I'm guarded" from Mine is very telling of what Taylor was going through.
June 16, 2010: [From a Lover Journal] After the CMT Music Awards, Taylor works on The Story Of Us for a few days, before finishing it on June 16th, on her way to Nathan Chapman's studio.
[MTV Interview] “I was at an awards show, and there was a guy there, obviously — it all starts there, doesn’t it? It was a guy I had been in a relationship with, falling out, then we end up at the same awards show, both trying to act like we don’t care, both like, you know, chatting up the people next to us. Afterward, I just felt so empty, like we were both fighting this silent war of pretending we didn’t care that the other was there. And I went home, and I wrote this song about it. And at that point, I had this gut feeling, and I knew the album was finished.”
[Lover Journal Page Transcript] “So I've been a little studio rat since the tour ended [...] I wake up to my cell phone alarm around 9:30 each morning, throw on a sundress, skip makeup, tie my hair in a messy side-braid, and head out the door with no shoes on. Because the only walking outside I'll be doing is from my house to my car, then from my car three steps to Nathan's basement studio. I worked on a song for a few days, then basically finished it in the car on the way to Nathan's this morning. It. Is. So. Good. And I can safely say I am DONE writing this record!! This song is up-tempo, and hooky and sort a torn sounding... like this horrible stressed confusion that comes on when you know the person you're pining away for is in the room. There are these invisible walls keeping things from being okay. So you're not fine. And they're not fine. And I'm happy I wrote that song!! :)”
Video: Making of The Story Of Us Demo
It will be the last song she writes before having a writer's block that will end 6 months later with All Too Well.
[USA Today Interview] [All Too Well] came after a six-month writing drought that followed a particularly toxic relationship. "There's a kind of bad that gets so overpowering you can't even write about it," she says of that time. "When you feel pain that is so far past dysfunctional, that leaves you with so many emotions that you can't filter them down to simple emotions to write about, that's when you know you really need to get out."
June 18, 2010: John Mayer presents Taylor with the Hal David Starlight Award, at the 41st Songwriters Hall of Fame Awards.
John's speech: “You could put her in a time machine in any era and she would have a hit record. Don't confuse everybody loving one thing as hype. Sometimes that's everyone agreeing that it's fabulous.”
From now on, Taylor will only focus on the production of Speak Now, tweaking the songs and overdubbing the instruments.
June 30, 2010: Taylor tweets about Amos Heller recording the bass on Mine at the Blackbird Studio. Clips from this day are also released.
July 8, 2010: Taylor is spotted in Maine, while filming the music video of Mine. The final mix of the song is not ready yet.
[Source] Taylor Swift was in Kennebunk today, July 8, shooting part of a new music video at Christ Church on Dane Street. The Rev. Janet Leighninger, pastor of Christ Church said they had been contacted a while ago by a company that scouts film locations and happened to check the church out one Sunday. “Then they called about a week ago and said could they possibly film here,” she said. Leighninger said she was told it would be a country artist shooting a music video, but not who the artist was. “We wanted to make sure it was appropriate,” she said. On the morning of the shoot, Leighninger discovered the artist was Swift.
[People who were there] "It was a blast to watch! Both Taylor and the guy in her video seemed to be having tons of fun and at one point where he proposes and they kissed he looked up at the camera crew and said 'She said no by the way.' The scene lasted about 30 minutes and then they started filming in the house again."
[Mixer Justin Niebank Interview] "Interestingly enough, I'd done some kind of pre‑mix of 'Mine' for a video thing, with the original drums and bass, and Nathan and Taylor were like: 'This is cool, but we want to go a little bit more for a power approach.' So by the time it got to the final mix they had rerecorded the bass and the drums and it sounded great.
The rough version of the final mix is called "Mine JN Master Mix", where JN stands for Justin Niebank. You can also see "SF" which stands for Shannon Forest, the drummer. The old stems played by Nathan are also visible.
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To sum up all of the known Mine demos:
First demo: Recorded in March 2010; all instruments played by Nathan Chapman; Mixed by Nathan.
Second demo: Mixed in June 2010, made for the Music Video; all instruments still played by Nathan Chapman; Mixed by Justin Niebank.
Third demo: Called "JN Master Mix": Mixed on July 21, 2010, bass played by Amos Heller, drums played by Shannon Forest, mixed by Justin Niebank, mix ready or almost ready to be mastered.
July 15, 2010: Taylor and Toby Hemingway are spotted shopping in West Hollywood. This is also the day when the orchestra strings for Back To December and Haunted are recorded, arranged by Paul Buckmaster. Taylor's interview in the studio here.
“I wanted the music and the orchestration [for Haunted] to reflect the intensity of the emotion the song is about, so we recorded strings with Paul Buckmaster at Capitol Studios in Los Angeles. It was an amazing experience – recording this entire big, live string section that I think in the end really captured the intense, chaotic feeling of confusion I was looking for.”
Late July 2010: In the meantime, Justin Niebank completes the definitive mixes. Mine is completed on July 21st specifically.
[Nathan Chapman] For Speak Now we had to mix 17 songs in three weeks, and I knew that I would want to go back to tweak some of the songs we had mixed earlier, and I did not want to have to recall the mixing board every time. There just wasn't time for that.
July 2010: Taylor moves out to her own condo in Nashville.
“This summer I've been 99 percent focused on my new record and one percent focused on the fact that I actually just moved into my first place. I'm officially moved in! I'm so excited! As you know, I've been constantly talking about how I've been antique shopping and non-stop planning and construction on this place. It's been really awesome to figure out what it's like to be on your own, just cooking and stuff. I'm having such a blast with it.”
The Never Grow Up secret message is: "I moved out in July".
July 2010: Shooting of the Speak Now Photoshoot with her band, The Agency.
August 4, 2010: Mine is released. It was supposed to be released on August 15th, but since it had leaked its release was anticipated.
August 31, 2010: The Mine Music Video is released. Taylor has a get-together at her home in Nashville with the kids in the video and their families.
Taylor broke down the music video in 2012 in this very funny interview for Vevo Certified;
Behind The Scenes Footage: PART 1, PART 2, PART 3 from the Speak Now Deluxe Edition/Target. This is very unhinged.
[Director Roman White comment] Creating this piece was beyond fun, and I’ve honestly never had a better time on a shoot. Was it crazy hot? Yes. Were there tons of bugs? Yes. Was all of this offset by the insanely gorgeous scenery? 100% YES! We shot the entire piece near Portland, Maine and much lobster was eaten! My AMAZING producer, Tameron Hedge, actually got accosted by a HUGE seagull who took off with her lobster roll (that’s how good they were). Other than that one little incident, Maine was absolute perfection. On the first day, we shot on a private estate with more than 2,000 acres and a private beach, rounding out the second day in a small harbor town. There was a lot going on, and I had a BLAST with the entire gang!
September 12, 2010: Taylor premiers Innocent at the VMAs, a year after the Kanye incident.
“You have to try really hard to regulate what you feel, what you let in, and what you don’t… but then when it comes to making an album, if you make everything general and kind of gloss over your actual, raw feelings, that doesn’t benefit anyone. As far as what to feel and what level to feel it, I can’t really control any of that. It’s just how things hit you, and what you let in is definitely something you’ve got to find a balance for.”
“I think a lot of people expected me to write a song about him. But for me it was important to write a song to him.”
October 25, 2010: Speak Now is finally released.
“There is also the fact that the album is called 'Speak Now,' and that pertains to the album as a concept and as an entire theme of the record, more than I can even tell you," she says. "I've been working on it for two years. Ever since we put out 'Fearless,' I've been writing for this record and conceptualizing it and putting it together in my head, what I wanted it to be. I like to take a lot of time between albums to work up the next one and see what it is. We did the same thing with 'Fearless.' We put two years in between it [and her self-titled debut album] and that gives enough time for me [to] write everything that I live. You have got to give yourself time to live a lot of things, so you can write a lot of things.”
“I wrote all the songs myself for this record. It didn't really happen on purpose. It just sort of happened that way. I'd get my best ideas at 3:00 AM in Arkansas, and didn't have a co-writer around and I'd just finish it. And that would happen again in New York; that would happen again in Boston; that would happen again in Nashville. The songs that made the cut for the albums are the ones that I wrote by myself so – wish me luck!”
“In life you have a lot of situations that pop up and people that come into your life, and sometimes you don’t get to tell them what you wish you would have told them,” Swift said. “This album is my opportunity to do that track-by-track. Each song is a different confession to a different person.”
“Some of the things I wrote about are things everyone saw me go through,” she added. “Some of the things I wrote about are things nobody ever knew about. I’m beyond excited for you to hear these stories and confessions.”
Bonus: The Vault
“My favorite thing to do is make a list of what the album can be, even when I'm in the beginning stages of writing the album and I've got three songs on the list. I still make a list of what the track listing would be like. Which [song] is track one, two or three. And then you keep writing more songs and writing more songs and all of a sudden you've got a list of 25 songs. What I would do is keep bumping off songs that I felt I had overwritten. As you keep writing more songs, your list gets better and better and better. And I did that so many times I can't even count!”
The Vault Titles:
Castles Crumbling
Someone Just Told Me
His Lies
Wonderful Things
I Can See You
Let's Go
Foolish One
Timeless
Bother Me
Electric Touch
When Emma Falls In Love
All of them are self-written.
This post will be edited once we will have additional info on the songs, especially the Vault Songs. Thank you for reading!
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napiersmirk · 25 days ago
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Hi!
I just wanted to drop by and tell you how much love your videos and edits!
I can’t tell you how much I appreciate your content and all the effort you put in. It really makes it so much more enjoyable being here. I’m not as active here as I used to be, and I’m just a stupid little blog here in the dumpster fire anyway, but it really makes my day seeing your videos.
Jacques and Flip have always been my favorites, and your Jacques edits remind me why and make me think I need to go rewatch Duel for the 100th time. I love Mills too. I think Strings is now my #2 for looks - he’s so hot omg. I love the big mean bearded guys, and there’s never enough content out there for them!
If you ever have any requests for a fic or story with any of those guys, I’d love to write something for you! I don’t do ships, and I’m pretty slow these days, but if you can put up with those things and have anything you’d like, feel free to send anything my way whenever you want! I love to write AUs and Halloween bs, but I’d give almost anything a try. My blog says requests are closed, so just ignore that. No pressure of course, just know the offer is there if you ever want.
You help keep people like me motivated to write, so if I can ever do something that keeps you motivated to do your thing, I’d love to!
Thank you for all your awesomeness 💗💗💗
Heyy!
First of all, thank you so so much for your kind words! I am so touched by this message (it made me tear up a little, not gonna lie).
This really means so much to me. Knowing that my edits keep inspiring you is the best compliment I could ever get. I think it goes both ways, really! I started editing Jacques after reading Power Struggles, I kept thinking I could replicate some of the scenes from that fic and I just had to try and see what happened. People seemed to love the result and that gave me enough confidence to keep editing medieval reylo and share my videos with everyone. Anyway, Jaques is my favorite Adam's character, too. Not the real person - obviously - but I think Adam looks so, so good in TLD. Maybe it's the longer hair or all those fancy clothes he wears, but I just cant get him out of my head. This scene in particular. It's been over a year and I still watch that video religiously.
Commander Mills (ugh, I love him) and Flip are also up there for me. I saw 65 at least 4 times when it came out. Mills is such a comfort character, and - OMG!! - I'd love to check out some of your work or request a fic! Never done it before and I don't know what you are comfortable writing about, but we could talk about it and you can let me know!
Oh and no pressure about this but just know I always welcome extensions/additions to my videos! If it's darkfic maybe run it by me beforehand, but I do love when writers create a story based on one of my edits! It's happened a few times on twitter and it always fascinates me to see how people interpret the different scenes I create.
Oh and I am not super active on here either (i'm mainly on twitter), but I enjoy sharing my edits on Tumblr because it is where it all started for me. I used to post edits for another fandom that I am not really into anymore - now that Reylo has consumed every fibre of my being - and being able to connect with people from other fandoms is amazing.
So, yeah, thank you so much for reaching out!! I always appreciate it 🤍
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bobohu4eva · 28 days ago
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I'm rereading Golden because it's just soooo good and I just fell in love with Baekhyun all over again 😭 Can I have him too? Please? Pretty please 😭😭😭??
Will we have anything soon? Or however long it takes, please don't feel pressured! Love your writing 😩 ♥️♥️ It's just so good sometimes I need to put my phone down and take a deep breath because my heart goes *thump thump* *thump thump* with how beautiful it is!!
Ahhhh I want to print it in my head. Pink Lace, Golden, all of them actually 🫠
Omg 🥹 thank you so so much first of all
I want a Golden Baek for myself too 😭 I'm writing this as he's live with his glasses and fluffy hair and he's soooo golden when they're studying together 🤧 the urge to smooch him through the screen is strong
As for future works I really wanted to get the vampire au done before Halloween but alas that did not happen 😔 maybe it'll just be a little late I guess?? There are other things I've been working on too!!
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rosalind-hawkins · 9 months ago
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You mind if I send another ship for the ask game? Protectshipping this time (⁠◕⁠ᴗ⁠◕⁠✿⁠)
Absolutely! I did write a fic for them once, and I think that was my only real Tristan fic before I wrote my Carryshipping fic. I just don't do much with Tristan as a character, no offense to the dude. But that doesn't stop me from having headcanons!
Gives nose/forehead kisses
Tristan, all the time. He will smother Ryou in face kisses until Ryou manages to snag him into a "real" one.
Gets jealous the most
Tristan. We know he has a jealous personality, and he doesn't like how much attention Ryou gets from the girls.
Picks the other up from the bar when they’re too drunk to drive
It doesn't happen often, but sometimes Tristan goes a little too hard when he's out with Joey and the buddies, but Ryou is right there with them and drives him home.
Takes care of on sick days
Tristan is very caring and knows how to take care of Ryou. Ryou does his best when it's his turn but needs a little instruction (it's hard to know how to take care of people when you've always lived alone).
Drags the other person out into the water on beach day
Ryou is so afraid of getting sunburned that he doesn't want to go out into the sun, but Tristan makes him and they have a lot of fun—and Tristan spreads the aloe on his sunburns for him the next day.
Gives unprompted massages
Neither of them, they're really not the type. Maybe after they've been together for a long time, Ryou will.
Drives/rides shotgun
Tristan drives and Ryou is perched on the back of his bike like perfect little arm candy, being thrilled and excited and nervous all at once.
Brings the other lunch at work
I think Tristan beings it to Ryou, who's a little spacey and forgetful sometimes.
Has the better parental relationship
Tristan for sure, because Ryou is one of those characters where it's hard to have a worse parental relationship.
Tries to start role-playing in bed
Maaaaaaybe Ryou, if he's had a few drinks and he's feeling a bit silly, but he usually passes out halfway through. Sleepytime for him.
Embarrassingly drunk dancer
Ryou, but it would take a lot for that to happen. All the right circumstances would need to line up, like a Halloween party with his friends and spiked punch.
Still cries watching Titanic
Ryou. The idea of love that powerful just gets him everytime. Tristan didn't cry, but he'll hold Ryou while he does.
Firmly believes in couples costumes
Tristan suggests it in a very low-pressure way, and Ryou will go for it sometimes.
Breaks the expensive gift rule during Christmas
Tristan goes overboard, boy can't help it when he's smitten.
Makes the other eat breakfast
Tristan keeps his spacey little cryptid boyfriend happy and healthy, which includes making sure he eats good meals and takes his vitamins and all that good stuff.
Remembers anniversaries
Ryou always dies, and the first time Tristan forgets, he puts reminders in his phone and email so it doesn't happen again. Tristan felt so guilty for forgetting, he hates seeing Ryou upset like that.
Brings up having kids
I actually have no idea on this one. It's a coin flip for me. I see them as being more pet parents than anything else, though, idk.
BONUS HEADCANON
Ryou has the weirder taste in music while Tristan has very mainstream music in his playlists. Whenever Ryou uses his accounts for music, it screws up all his recommendations so badly. It takes forever to fix. Ryou is pretty oblivious to the fact that he's doing this, and Tristan doesn't say anything because he didn't want Ryou to think he doesn't like his music or doesn't want him listening to the stuff that makes him happy.
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lafiametta · 2 years ago
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For the modern AU, what would their first Valentine's Day be like? Do they try to make a surprise or prefer to discuss their plans openly so as to avoid unwanted reactions? I imagine Ling Yi likes to organize events like that (like how she loves planning for her Halloween costumes), but how careful would she be with Olek in the beginning of their relationship? And what would be their first gift to each other?
And welcome back btw! Happy to see you around again 😊
Thanks, friend — I'm glad to be back!
For their first Valentine's Day, I can imagine Ling Yi not wanting to make a super big deal out of it, just because she doesn't want to put too much pressure on him. (And, honestly, the two of them are still a bit weirded out by the way it's all done in America, being so corporatized and made to seem like it's the only way to make it clear how serious you are about your relationship.) But I can also see Olek wanting to do something sweet and romantic for her, so maybe he builds it up a little more in his mind than she does. Rather than take her out for an expensive meal (which he can't really afford anyway), he would invite her over to his place and make her dinner. (And because he doesn't really have a lot of kitchen skills, he might invite Jérôme over to help him out — Jérôme at least has some knowledge of what decently-prepared French food should look and taste like, so there's that. Does Olek nearly burn himself and his kitchen down with Jérôme's hand torch as he's trying to make crème brûlée? Does he have to run down to the fancy bakery and buy some exquisitely decorated little chocolate dessert? Yes and yes.)
So I think that the dinner would Olek's Valentine's gift to Ling Yi — along with a bouquet of roses. (There's definitely a part of him that is a traditionalist, and roses are so classic.)
Ling Yi, of course, loves everything: the roses, the dinner, the candle-lit table, even the smell of scorched caramel that's still lingering in the kitchen. She wants to get him a gift that means something, but isn't so pricey that it's going to make him feel bad. At this point, they've been going out for nearly eight months and he's been spending a fair amount of time at her place (and staying over almost every weekend), so her gift to him is a duplicate key to her apartment. On a practical level, it makes sense for him to have one, but she understands — and he does too, when he sees it — that it says a lot about how much she trusts him and how much she wants him to feel at home when he stays over with her.
After dinner, the plan is to watch a movie, but they never make it that far. As Olek is washing up the dishes, Ling Yi slips her arms around his waist and starts softly kissing along the side of his neck. After that, it doesn't take long before he scoops her up and carries her back to his bed!
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trashbag-baby666 · 2 years ago
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My Snowman and Me-Luztoye
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Summary: George is sick on his favorite day of the year.
WC: 1,683.
C/W: None??
Link To My Masterlist!
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"This is the worst thing that's ever happened to me," George sighed and blew his nose. Joe never knew anyone that got as pumped up for Christmas as George Luz did.
Joe remembers so clearly his first Christmas dating George and how the day after Halloween George had all of his Christmas decorations up and his assortment of Glee Christmas playlists playing.
George had a whole shelving system dedicated to ceramic Christmas trees to match his real Christmas tree.
Growing up Joes family never did much for Christmas they'd get together at his Grandma and Grandpas house and eat Arroz con gandules and other Puerto Rican foods his grandma would make. Then they'd go to a midnight mass and call it good.
George on the other hand. The Luz family was large and they always went big.
Mr and Mrs. Luz had won a few outdoor Christmas decoration awards for their excessive lights and fun decorations.
George loved Christmas he loved the weather, giving gifts, baking, and eating.
So George grew up a Christmas fanatic.
George occasionally made Joe dress up as Santa for his younger siblings.
But this year George was sick. Like super sick. He had the flu.
This was the worst thing George could imagine happening. On the 22nd George had some sinus pressure on the 23rd George woke up full on congested and coughing. Later that day George was throwing up the little he had eaten.
After a teary phone call with his mom it was decided George and Joe would be doing Christmas together in their small house they'd shared since they married.
"George we can go see your family as soon as your feeling better. Here take more of these." Joe frowned sitting next to his husband and handing him some tea and cold pills.
"I know i just," he paused swallowing the far too large Orange, gel capsules, "You know how I feel about Christmas."
"I know Georgie," Joe ran his hand through George's messy brown hair. So now the two spent Christmas Eve George's mom dropped off some food and so did Joes mom, "At least we can have some good food later."
"If I don't throw it up," George frowned sinking down further in the couch.
"We'll just eat little bits at a time to not upset your stomach. Do you wanna watch Elf? Or we could watch the Glee Christmas episodes? Maybe even Die Hard?"
"Die Hard is not a Christmas movie," George stifled a laugh trying to pout as he looked at Joe.
"Die Hard is too a Christmas movie, it's me and Bills favorite." Joe giggled.
"Oh we're gonna miss Bills amazing Christmas spaghetti," George whined turning his head into Joes chest.
"Because you're sick on Christmas Eve doesn't mean we can't go see our friends and family in a few days when you're better and hassle them for leftovers." Joe rubbed George's back.
"You're right Joe," George nodded and wiped his nose with the back of his hand.
"Well if it's about nine?" Joe checked his apple watch, "We can put Elf on, take a little nap and have lunch?"
"Why're we structuring the day?" George looked up at Joe, meeting his brown eyes.
"We don't have to," Joe shrugged and kissed the top of George's head.
"Can we take a bath?" George hummed. Joe nodded, both of them climbing off the couch, George's feet dragging slightly. He had been feeling like he had been hit by a truck all morning and he honestly wished he could just curl up into Joe and sleep till he was healed. George had taken all kinds of medicines to get rid of it fast but it wasn't budging. Hell, he had even used some of Gene's herbal healings and crystals. It made everyone laugh when they found out Gene was super into Pagan ritualistic healing yet he was a doctor. But for Gene it was also a religious thing but it still earned laughs.
"Do you wanna pick out some clean pajamas for us? Why I start a bath?" Joe peaked his head out of the bathroom joined into the room. George nodded and opened their walk in closet and began opening drawers looking for their matching pajamas. Joe turned the faucet on finding the right temperature and then adding in some bath salts that were good for when you were sick and one of the matching bath bombs. George came into the bathroom and set the matching holiday pj's on the counter.
"Do you want me to join you in the tub?" Joe asked. George grabbed a tissue off the counter top and blew his nose trying to nod at the same time.
Joe smiled and pulled his shirt off, George tossed the tissue away and stripped. Joe did the same removing his leg and sitting on the edge of the tub lowering himself in. George waited and then climbed in, laying in between Joe's legs.
"It's helping my tummy already,"Joe leaned his head back.
"I'm glad, we'll get you some vapo rub after." Joe snickered.
"You and your fuckin' vapo rub," George's lips turned up and he shook his head. They lived and loved for each others stupid little quirks.
"It works, Ma knows it all and it has always worked for me and my sisters." Joe smiled and defended himself.
"What animal do you look like when you get in the bath?" George leaned his head into his chest to look up at Joe.
"What?" Joe cocked an eyebrow waiting for the punchline to this god awful joke.
"A little bear," George smiled looking at Joe.
"Okay thats a good one," Joe chuckled and ran a hand through his hair looking at the man he loved.
       A while later they were snuggled in their shared bed George laid across Joe's chest soft snores escaping his chapped lips. Joe gently ran a hand through George's soft brown hair.                                                                                                                          George woke himself up as a  series of coughs and sneezes escaped his mouth as he sat up.
Joe reached for Georges waterbottle unscrewing the lid off of it and holding it out for George.                                                                                                               George took a series of gulps from the metal water bottle and grabbed for his tissue box.                                                                                                                                                          
"I'm sorry Joey," George sighed as he blew his nose and handed his sticker-covered water bottle back to Joe.                                                                                                                       
"You have nothing to be sorry for hun," Joe rubbed his back supportingly, "Do you want some tea?"                                                                                  
"Yeah, I'm hungry. I wanna try and eat some of the stuff our parents brought over." George sighed getting out of bed and throwing away his tissues into the garbage by the bed.                                                                                                                                            
"Are you sure?" Joe asked. George nodded and waited for Joe to put his leg back on before they walked to the kitchen.
George got out the assortment of tupperware filling their fridge of goodies from their moms.
"I'm so excited to eat your ma's meatballs," Joe smiled, grabbing two plates down from the cabinet.
"She said she put extra in for you," George chuckled as he plated just a little bit of everything onto his plate not wanting to make his stomach more upset.
"Your ma is too sweet," Joe smirked as he put George's plate in the microwave. George's phone alarm went off for him to be able to take more cold medicine.
"It's almost a savior when it goes off," George hit repeat and grabbed the little foil wrapped pills and unwrapped them swallowing the uncomfortable large pills.
They ate their Christmas dinner together and watched their holiday movies.
George fell asleep on Joes chest and that's where they staid for the night.
Once Joe woke up he decided to make it extra special for George since this was his first Christmas away from his family.
Joe carefully laid George down on the couch and started the coffee pot up.
He went into his closet in their room and got out the presents he had gotten for George and set them up around the tree and turned the Christmas tree lights on.
Joe admired his work before going to the kitchen and starting on some home made cinnamon rolls.
Joe poured himself a cup of coffee and then got George's cup of coffee ready. All sugared up and stuck in the microwave for him to enjoy.
Joe loved his alone time but loved it even more when George was with him to do whatever.
Joe felt a smile peak onto his face as he heard George rustling around and a sneeze.
George was up right away and walking to the kitchen, "Good morning cowboy."
"Good morning Georgie," Joe flicked a smile up at George as he put the cinnamon rolls in the oven.
George hugged Joe tight around the waist. George was much shorter his face smashing into Joes back.
"There's coffee in the microwave for you," Joe turned around and hugged the shorter boy.
"Thank you," George hummed and kept the hug tight.
"Are you gonna let go or are we stuck like this all day?" Joe snickered.
"I just missed you," George sighed slumping into Joe more.
"I was next to you all night," Joe smiled and gently stroked George's light brown hair.
"Well I just miss my family," George frowned snuggling impossibly further to Joe.
"I'm sorry Hun. I know this is really hard for you." Joe pulled away and held George's elbows so they were looking at each other.
"Can we FaceTime with my Ma why they open gifts and we can open ours from them?" George furrowed his eyebrows and made puppy eyes at Joe.
"Yes we can darlin' I'm gonna set the timer for the rolls and we can get all set up." Joe smiled and kissed George's head watching George happily run into the living room with his coffee and getting his phone to call his mother.
Joe lived to see how happy George was and whenever George was down he felt worse too.
But they were trying to fix the emotions of being away from family on the holidays.
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episode-o · 2 years ago
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I haven’t posted on here for a while so life update.
Victor and me are no more. Mari was right the fact that he is 13 years older than me was weird and I want someone who will grow with me instead of waiting for me to grow up.
Enter Jara
Yes yes fucking one of my co workers again I know but listen. Holy shit they are so sexy. And they’re actually my age? How long has it been since I slept with some one who wasn’t like at least 5 years older than me? Adam? Mace maybe? But that doesn’t matter as much as they just seem like genuinely interested in me and attracted to me. This is the first time that someone I was this physically into was into me too. Not only that but they fall into the same subculture I do if not deeper in it than me. Sure their music taste is a lil weird (they decided they loved the tequila song and listened to it non stop for hours one time) but I love talking to them and listening to anything they have to say. They’re also so fucking smart I’m like in awe. Don’t even get me started on the sex it’s unreal.
More important than that though, this is the first relationship I chose to be in. I wasn’t told that we were in a relationship, I wasn’t continually pressured to be something more with them or just kind of assumed that we were together. We were seeing each other for about 6 months before we made it official and somewhere in there they dropped that if I wanted to be more with them we could talk about it. They said it very casually and I don’t know if they realized it but it meant a lot to me. They put the ball in my court and let me decide the pace of things. So I did. On Halloween weekend I was over at their place and we were in bed together and just talked about it. There have been ups and downs but hey that’s growing pains. I love them and that’s part of the reason I had to have the conversation with them in the first place. We’ve been official for about a month and a half now and have been seeing each other since may. They’re quitting soon and I’m a little nervous because my sleep/work schedule might be opposite theirs and I might not get to see them as much but I’m willing to put in the effort to keep being with them and I think they are too.
They’re going on a 6 week long trip soon and I’m going to miss them but they offered for me to fly down to the bay for like the last week or so that they’re there and then we’ll drive back up together. I’m so excited to be able to spend more time with them and also just to see what this turns into
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luveline · 2 years ago
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miss jade your bodyguard!james example hit me right in the chest.. can I get candy apples and do you wanna dance? with a bodyguard!james au?? Where you’re dying for a sleepover with your girlfriends but he’s gotta sit in there with you and he totally gets into it gossiping and painting nails and doing face masks and making friendship bracelets? I yearn for big buff scary babygirl James and his shy little charge :’)) - happy Halloween !!!!!!! 🧡🖤
join luveline's halloween party ♡
mei my angel my literal everything best idea ever and I had to include what we talked about too, tysm for ur request baby happy halloween ♡ bodyguard!james x shy!fem!reader (also tipsy!reader)
You really hadn't wanted to bring it up but at the same time, you'd felt like you had to. James had assured you to do whatever it is that's going to make you most comfortable, even if what makes you most comfortable is actually making your new friends most comfortable.
"He... He has to come, but James doesn't mind sitting in the adjoining room. I'm sorry," you'd said.
Mindy, a friend you'd miraculously managed to make at the supermarket of all places, had given your bodyguard a once over with a huge smile. "Are you kidding? He's welcome to sit wherever he likes. He's very welcome."
You'd felt a flicker of something. Not jealousy. A general wash of embarrassment at the implication that James is, rightfully, eye-candy.
"Are you wearing aftershave?" you ask now, not a question you would usually have the courage to ask. You're shocked.
"Cologne, actually," James says.
You gawp at him.
James looks both lovely and ridiculous. He's bedecked in smart clothes, his casual civilian clothing, and it's enough to make your heart skip a beat. Tight sleeves, tight pants. He's a classic handsome on a bad day. Tonight, he's breathtaking.
Especially carrying your pink backpack.
You like how much he doesn't care about stuff like this. Your backpack thrown over his shoulder, your coat in the crook of his elbow. None of it is his job, the only thing he really has to do is stop you from getting maimed or killed, but he does it anyways.
"It's nice," you say awkwardly. What you'd wanted to say was worse. Are you wearing cologne to impress Mindy?
His smile is horrifyingly smug. "Thank you, princess. Think you should knock again?"
You knock again, your hand barely pulled from the door when it swings open.
"Hi," Mindy says, smiling as soon as she sees you.
It's such a nice thing, for your presence to make somebody smile like that, and you find yourself smiling back without any of your usual shyness.
"And hello," she adds, sizing James up with a light-hearted expression of dizziness. "Did you get more handsome, Mr. Bodyguard?"
James hand touches between your shoulders. "Maybe slightly."
Mindy laughs gleefully. "Maybe so. Please, come in. We were waiting on your before we start Dirty Dancing."
You beam. Mindy shows you and James into the living room of her home where the rest of your new friends wait. They're all just as excited to see you as you are to see them, greeting you with hugs and smiles. They say hello to James too, which is really nice. James doesn't mind, but sometimes people act as if he's not there. It's my job to sink into the background, he'd placated once.
Still, you don't like when people ignore him. This spells good tidings.
You're in very nice but comfy clothes, soft loose trousers and a t-shirt that's too big for you, because you'd thought that was what people where to these kinds of things — it's what they wear in all the movies you'd watched to prepare — so you're horrified when you realise they're all dressed in fancy blouses and fine jewellery.
"Sit down," James reminds you gently, putting pressure on your shoulder until you sit.
"Right," you say with a laugh.
"You can sit wherever you like," Mindy says to James.
He tips his head slightly to one side. "I really don't want to intrude on you girls. I can happily stay by the door."
Mindy shakes her head. "No, sir. You can protect your lovely treasure from right here."
James sits beside you.
Mindy is clearly quite wealthy. Her living room is a large space with huge couches and an impressive television bolted high on the wall, Dirty Dancing already queued and waiting to play. Before you know it you've a cocktail in hand and the lights have been turned down low, the movie accompanied by a low level of chatter.
"Patrick," Georgia says dreamily, watching as the main characters dance in the middle of an empty room.
"He's not very handsome-" Milly says.
"What?"
"Let me finish! He's not very handsome in the classical way, is he? But his demeanour is what makes him so yummy."
You huff under your breath, a laugh you can't contain as they descend into a debate on all his pros and cons.
"He's more handsome because he can dance. It's his charisma."
"What does Y/N think?" Mindy asks, turning to you eagerly. You almost choke on your sip of cosmopolitan, face growing warm under their expectant gazes.
It's not entirely their fault. James turns to you to, you can feel his thigh pressed closer to yours. This isn't the kind of thing you and he ever talk about.
"Um, he... Well, I think he's-" Your voice falls to an insecure murmur. "He's not not handsome."
"I don't think he's all that," James says.
The girls roar with laughter. You turn to James to watch him chuckling, a grateful smile on your face.
"Can you dance, James?" Milly asks.
His arms burns where it touches your own. "Not like that," he says.
More laughter. You feel two things at once, and this time you're willing to admit one is some sort of jealousy. He's super funny and you love that about him, you're just not sure if you love everybody else knowing it too. But then, the second feeling, pure affection for him. He deserves droves of girls fawning over him. It makes sense that they're all so charmed.
They all sing the closing song of the movie to each other in dramatic duets. Mindy tries to include you, and then Georgia does too, but singing in front of people isn't something you do. It takes too much courage. You'd have to disregard the embarrassment of being bad, and you're not good at that. Nevertheless it's a great time that makes you laugh until your side hurts, especially when Dahlia and Darcy try to do the dangerous 'lift' dance move.
You dip your head toward James. "You could definitely do that."
He laughs, startled. "Do what, shortcake?"
"The lift."
"Only if you're the one I'm lifting," he bargains.
"Never in a million years," you say, cheeks filled with heat.
They want to do manicures after that. This is two cosmopolitans later, mind you, but you gather around the coffee table with finger dividers, and soon Milly is passing out calming sheet masks she got from the supermarket. You laugh at one another, ghosts in practice, and your laughter gets worse when James agrees to let Milly put one on him. His hair's so thick and curly that he needs to wear a headband to keep it away from his face, a salmon coloured pair of bunny ears.
You're on your fourth cocktail, a long island iced tea, by the time your nails are done, and Georgia has started retelling a story about her last date, how weird the guy had been, and how he had failed spectacularly in the bedroom.
"I mean, I probably should've known there wouldn't be much joy when he showed me his matchbox collection, but I thought he was eclectic, not stupid."
You giggle and lean hard into James side for support, your own face mask starting to slip down your face. He's already peeled his own off, skin shiny and soft, and he reaches out with delicate fingertips to pull yours away too.
"Here," he says, dabbing the excess essence off with a flannel.
"Thanks, Jamie," you say happily.
"Worst date of my life," Georgia finishes, rolling her eyes.
"I can't beat that one!" Darcy says quickly. "I was twenty, and we went to Burger King for dinner. Burger King. I was wearing a little black dress and heels. And when we get back in the car, we were supposed to be going for a film, he leans over the handbrake and starts trying to kiss me and all I could see was a tiny piece of lettuce in his mustache," — you hiccup hard and slap a hand over your mouth, overjoyed by her tortured tone — "I pulled away, obviously. And he grabs my shoulder and said, come on baby, I saw how you were looking at me back there.
Back there. In the Burger King." She rolls her eyes. "You gotta be kidding me."
The girls share their horror stories and you laugh and sigh sympathetically in most of the right places, until you're the only one left who hadn't spoken.
"What about you, Y/N?" Dahlia asks.
"Yeah, what's your nightmare date?"
You stiffen. "I mean... I... I haven't-"
"Come on, it can't be as bad as the guy who spit in my ear," Milly says.
You laugh, because ew, but struggle to come clean without sounding awkward. "I've never been on a date before."
"Oh," Mindy says, sounding not disgusted but let down. She recovers swiftly. "Well, you aren't missing anything, babe."
"Yeah," Darcy placates. "Especially if it's with a guy. No offense."
James raises a hand. "Please, it's fine. I've no delusions when it comes to my sex."
The girls continue to try and comfort you. You hadn't wanted any comfort, and every new reassurance makes you shrink. It's lovely that they're trying to make you feel better, but you feel abruptly inexperienced and ashamed about it.
"I once had a girl break an egg against my forehead," James says.
They all pause.
"On a first date?"
"Yup. She'd brought eggs. In her purse."
They gawp. You gawp. You've never heard this story.
Halfway through a dramatic rehashing his hand finds your calf for a quick squeeze. You realise he's making the whole thing up shortly after and you've never felt more thankful for him. And he once stopped you from getting tasered by grabbing the weapon with his bare hands, so.
"Aren't we a little old for friendship braceletes?" Milly asks, a practically fully-formed chevron bracelet in hand.
You struggle with your beginners bracelet made of four strands. James, beside you, is a natural. Your elbows keep brushing together, and it's a lot.
"Some of us had bad childhoods, Milly."
"Shit," you whisper, your bracelet loop sneaking out from under the masking tape anchoring it to the table for the tenth time in as many minutes.
"You're pulling too hard," James whispers back.
"Everyone's quicker than me!"
Mindy yawns and proclaims to go receive the sleeping bags and air mattresses she'd promised. "Keep working, Y/N! I want that bracelet around my wrist when I get back."
"No problem," you say easily, and then, "James, what do I do? Please help me."
James looks over at your bracelet. You've made knots on the wrong strings, the bracelet more a net than anything. He side eyes the group of girls sitting around him, all putting the finishing touches on their projects, before quietly slipping his bracelet into his lap and swapping it with yours.
"Stick it back on the table and I'll show you," he murmurs covertly.
You stick his bracelet on the table in front of you with some masking tape and James takes charge. He grabs your hands with zero hesitation and shows you how to knot the strings, the 4-shape you need to make and which strings you need to make it on. His hands are very warm, super soft, and when he lets go you feel it like an absence.
"Get it?" he asks.
Kind of. There's an obvious difference in the quality of knots made. James' are all neat and uniform, yours less so, but you chalk it upto rushing and mindy doesn't know any different, hugging you as you tie it around her wrist.
"It's stunning," she proclaims. "Where's yours, Mr Bodyguard?"
He shows your bracelet. "I had some trouble."
There's a little wave of giggles that hurts your feelings, but then Darcy says, "It's alright, James. They're really hard if you've never made them before."
"Yeah, I spent an entire summer in primary school teaching myself. That's a great effort for a beginner!"
"Practice makes perfect, anyways."
James nudges you casually with his elbow. "Thanks, ladies."
Soon, the room is enveloped by the rushing sound of the electric air pump blowing up air mattresses. They're sandwiched together, and even with Darcy on the couch and Mindy in her own bed there's no enough room.
"I'm so sorry," she says, "I didn't think about where he'd sleep."
"Technically, I won't really be sleeping," James says.
Your heart is thudding painfully against your ribcage. "Uh, well," — you're so desperate to seem cool and not cause any problems that you blurt without thinking — "it's fine, James doesn't mind sharing with me." You look up into his dazzling, sun-kissed face. "Do you?"
A flicker of surprise clouds his features. He hides it. "No, of course I don't mind."
The time approached half-twelve quickly. James is off shift at 1AM, and while he might usually go home he's already told you he'll be staying the night. He hates when you're in unfamiliar places. You don't complain, though when it's dark and everyone is drunkenly snoozing in their plastic beds, you sit up in your sleeping bag and search for his figure in the dark.
"James?" you murmur.
"What, sweetheart?"
"Is y'shift over?"
"Yeah. Mason's just pulled up outside." Mason means Jack and Jack means the night team. You roll your eyes at how ridiculously looked after you are.
"Do you want to come and sleep? You must be tired," you continue, your own voice dulcet with an obvious fatigue.
James picks his way over to you where you're nestled in your pyjamas and sleeping bag. "I can go kip in the van, if it makes you uncomfortable."
Is he kidding? He's just spent the night not only looking after you but making sure time and time again that you didn't look stupid in front of your new friends. He might be the nicest boy you've ever met, and the last thing you want him to do after all of this is go sleep sitting up in the back of a van.
"Are you crazy?" you mumble, unzipping your sleeping bag to entice him in. "S'cold in here. Your nose would get frost bite out there."
"Poor night team," he laments agreeably.
The air matress lifts you up with James' added weight. He makes his way under the unzipped sleeping back and has to cling to your hip to stop himself from falling off. You frown at his scratchy clothes.
"Did you bring pajamas?" you ask.
"No offense, shortcake, but no. Obviously I did not."
Your sleep (and cocktail) addled brain doesn't have the energy to feel offended. "Y'gonna be uncomfortable."
He doesn't speak. You assume he's done talking for the night and curl your leg up toward his thigh, when he says, "You won't mind if I take my shirt off? The fancy labels are really itchy."
"No, fancy-pants, I won't mind."
Even in your state you can feel the nervousness of being so close to him after he's peeled off his shirt. He's a huge hot water bottle beside you and you face toward him, cold but miles too shy to make a move.
It's like he can read your mind. "Are you still cold?" he asks, pulling the sleeping bag up to your chin.
"A little. My nose is cold," you murmur, eyes feeling heavier by the second.
His hand lands tentatively against your cheek. His thumb rubs against the tip of your nose. "What was it you said about frost bite?"
You genuinely can't remember. His hand is so warm, his body, his touch something you desire badly on a good day and yearn ceaselessly for on your worst. You bracelet his wrist where it rests against your neck and rub over his pulse unthiningly.
"You want a hug?" he asks knowingly.
"Just for a second," you agree. Your dignity shrivels with the speed of your reply.
He laughs under his breath and slides his arm under your shoulders. For a second it's uncomfortable and achy, and then he's pulling the brunt of your weight onto his chest and wrapping arms around you.
You shudder at how warm he is, the heat of his palms over your spine.
You lavish in his hold and steal all of his emanating heat until you're toasty as can be, sleeping bag snug over your limbs and face nestled in the bare skin of James' shoulder.
"Sorry," you mumble.
"For what?"
You're surprised he's still awake.
"For... For being so... I don't know. Because you had to save me so many times."
"Saving you from awkward situations is easy, don't worry about it. And I think you would've done better without me than you realise."
His hand creeps up the nape of your neck.
You're pretty beside yourself, tipsy and tired and tenderised by his tactile touching. He's familiar. More familiar than anything. It feels like a dream to be in his arms. It probably is.
"You're a good girl, Y/N," he says, and it doesn't feel weird at all. He means it honestly. "You're kind. You're caring. People were bound to love you eventually. It took a while, but they do."
"It didn't take you a while."
"Well, I'm smarter than everybody else, you know that," he says.
You both laugh. His hand strokes the side of your face and rests behind your ear. You can't pin point when you fall from dizzy laughter into sleep, but James can.
He watches your face relax in the near-dark, watches your shoulders settle under his hands. The whole while he's thinking God, what am I doing? This isn't professional. This is the opposite of professional.
He tries to ease you off of him and abandons all hope when you turn your face into his chest and your lips touch his skin. Each exhale a warm kiss.
In the morning, he'll likely tease you within an inch of your life. You're shy enough on a normal day that he doubts you'll survive it. But for now, he rubs the length of your back and wonders if this is how you feel when he's standing guard. So, so safe.
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thotsforvillainrights · 2 years ago
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If it's ok, Hari, Nine, or Chimera with a mute s/o? (Also Have a Happy Halloween where you are!)
(Happy Halloween! I can’t wait to eat half my body weight in sugary treats and watch old reruns of my favorite slasher movies!!!)
~Hari, Nine, Chimera’s Mute S/O~
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headcanon|scenario|imagine|match-up
~Chronostasis~
-At first he doesn’t even notice you’re mute. In fact, he just thought you were shy around everyone. Because you caught his eye and captured his heart, he was determined to get you out of your shell. It becomes a little overwhelming since he’s always around you and always saying something or trying to get you to talk to him. Is there something wrong with this guy? Can he not seem to catch a hint??? After a while he starts to become a little disheartened bit by bit. He figures that maybe you just didn’t like him as much as he liked you. Just when he was about to give up, Chisaki confronted him. “Chrono, can you stop hassling the new members of the group? I got an email from Y/N about you.” Hari chuckled and rubbed the back of his neck. “Yea...don’t worry about me. I can catch a hint. I figure Y/N maybe hates me. She/He/They never say a single thing to me no matter what I do.” Chisaki just stared at his friend before rolling his eyes. “Are you dense? Y/N is mute. Get back to work.” Kai walked past Hari so he could make it to his office and have a good laugh over the situation without anyone noticing. “Mute?” Hari stood there for a moment as the gears began turning in his head. “Ha...haha...hahahaha!!! Oh man!” He felt like an idiot for missing that detail, but a happy idiot nonetheless. Now that he knew more about you, he knew the best way to approach you from now on. He started with a proper apology for being so annoying to you to begin with. After that, it was history!
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~Nine~
-Realizes it right away when he first meets you. That of course hasn’t stopped him for falling head over heels for you. He exchanges numbers and emails so that way the two of you can communicate with each other through the distance. He has to admit that he wishes to hear your voice someday but he’d never say it to your face because he’d never want to put that pressure on you. With him being as sick as he is, he still can’t help but to wonder though...Aside from this, he’s wonderful at attending to you as a partner. The lack of verbal communication does nothing for him in the way of the relationship. He enjoys the way you two communicate with each other through your actions. He always speaks to you in a soft tone, always being extra gentle with you whether you were mute or not. He loves you dearly and even takes time out of his day to learn a little more about what being mute entails. If you ever begin to feel like there was no one in the world that understood you, at least you know he was the one person that did. This is all the same for love too.
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~Chimera~
-To be honest with you he’s a little confused at first. I mean, yeah he knows you’re mute when you first get together but he still kinda feels like maybe you could say something? He tells you this and it may hurt your feelings depending on how you can handle him. Don’t worry because eventually he works up the nerve to apologize, uttering a gruff “Sorry” while petting the top of your head. To be honest with you, he’s totally okay with it now. He really wasn’t much for speaking himself. In fact, he’s pretty quiet when he’s alone but now you’re around so yeah. The only times he gets loud is when he’s watching a game he likes or drinking way too much for a special occasion. The silence doesn’t bother him since he’s recently learned to pick up on your various actions/cues around the house. He can now simply look into your eyes and read a thousand words. The longer you stay together, the better he gets at reading you. Oh and God forbid anyone try to mess with you about being mute. They don’t want to run into him because he’ll slaughter someone for you.
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theharddeck · 2 years ago
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*kicks down door* I hear we're dropping into your ask box with whatever we got 👀 so here's my contribution. who do you think out of the dagger squad (and others if you're inclined) go allll out for the holidays (halloween, christmas, etc.)? like i'm talking decorations out the wazoo or just general excitement ya feel? personally I think Fanboy absolutely loves Halloween and goes wild and Bob likes a lowkey jazz Christmas
WELCOME BABE!!! this isn't all of them, but boy howdy do i have thoughts
Fanboy is absolutely into halloween, because he strikes me just as the most family-guy there is! he's making little goody bags to give to all the kids he knows on base, even if they don't come trick or treating by the dorms/barracks. he's making candy apples in the shared kitchen, he's wearing kitschy halloween shirts with puns, the whole thing. on principle, he watches Coco in the common room, and pretends it's not a big deal, but when the dagger squad all individually filter in to watch it together in a dog pile on the couch, it means the world to him
So I hc Payback as being from Louisiana, and I have never met one (1) person from Louisiana who is chill about Mardi Gras. He's handing out throws (beads), he's making a king cake, he's wearing Carnival colors loud and proud. idk if any of the daggers are catholic, much less practicing, but everyone knows when ash wednesday and fat tuesday are, because he's That Into It
Bob is a jazzy Christmassy boy. he's playing the Claymation christmas movies (if you look closely, he's reciting the entire script to A Year Without A Santa Claus under his breath as it plays in the background), he's buying old vinyl anytime he can, and he absolutely insists on playing his christmas playlist which is bing crosby, rosemary clooney, frank sinatra, and the like. on christmas eve he painstakingly makes a gingerbread house, reads A Christmas Carol to himself, and he leaves an orange stuck with cloves outside everyone's doors
i feel like that makes Phoenix a new years gal! She's definitely got a good playlist going, planned down to the perfect moment when the clock strikes midnight. she wouldn't pressure anyone to stay up or make resolutions, but if you wanted to be awake for midnight, she'd be sure to wake you up so you're there. Bob's rubbed off on her, so she goes a little vintage--silver and gold party hats, noisemakers, and she has confetti air canons too. she pours champagne into dixie cups for everyone and leads folks in singing Auld Lang Syne, though she's for sure the only one who knows all the words.
I don't want to do it, but it's inevitable -- Rooster loves the fourth of July. not fireworks, not the parades, none of that, but the barbecue, beers by a grill, sunburns on your neck even though you've put on sunscreen a million times, s'mores by a bonfire as the sun fades. he and his mom used to go up to the lake, away from anywhere that'd have loud celebrations, and just have a quiet holiday, where they can remember goose in a soft, sacred way, without the noise of everyone else. he's still more melancholy than not, but it's a day that means family and memory, and it's special to him
Mav hates the Fourth of July, until after the dagger mission, when Rooster invites him to celebrate with him. they go up to the old lake house, pop a couple Bruce Springsteen cassettes into a radio they find, grill burgers and corn out on a kettle charcoal grill, and Maverick thinks that maybe this day isn't as heavy as it's always felt
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alreadyblondenow · 4 years ago
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Jaehyun’s Body | Jung Jaehyun
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▸ Jaehyun x reader ▸ Smut, Smut, Smut, Fluff, Angst, Demon Jaehyun, Prostitute reader ▸ HALLOWEEN SERIES: 127 HOUSE ▸ 5/5 for NEOHALLOWEEN writing festival hosted by @nct-writers​
Summary: Jaehyun is a demon who uses girls to make him stay handsome. He eats girls… literally. Then he met you and he can’t eat you because he’s in love with you.
Word count: 7K
Warnings: Sex, sex, sex, a lot of killings, mentions of killings, Blood, lots and lots of blood, killings again, then another killings, eating of human flesh, filthy (I’m telling you), all kinds of sex, swearing, abduction, mentions of eating children but he stopped don’t worry, pregnancy, murder, attempted murder, suicide (?), prostitution, mentions of sex club, depression, mentions of therapy, mentions of cheating
A/N: Pure fiction, we all know that Jaehyun doesn’t need girls to make him handsome. I made this filthier than ever because it’s my last fic for 127 House. I made a timestamp for this as a bonus preview so if you already read it, yay. Inspired by the movie Jennifer’s Body and Pretty Woman. I changed the ending last minute I hope you wont hate me. Also, I’m sure a lot of you want to read more Jaehyun eating girls, literally, in action. So I will just make another timestamp for that in the next few days. 
Taglist: For the last time, if I happen to forget you I’m so sorry :( @chocolattees @floweringtheflowers @huangxx @bumblebeenct @neosculptures @kooksfairyfloss @jaehyunoos @soothingjae @plump-peach @neospirited @jeongyoonohs @shanghai-lu @seriousballoon @sunshinedhyuck  @the-universe-in-you-jjh  @mira-winterlight @generantionct @mal-nakamoto23 @svteencarat​ @johnjaespeach​ @jinsonaz​ @hyuckshoe69 
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Halloween present time 
“Mom, can you tell me the story about the monster who eats humans just so he can look like one too?” your nine-year-old daughter snuggles beside you on a Halloween night, tired from trick or treating and already sleepy.  
“Just because it’s Halloween” you boop her nose and kept her close to you, stroking her head and making her comfortable. 
“Once upon a time, there were five teenagers who want to make a deal with the devil. The clueless teenagers did not know that what they were doing was wrong. Meaning, wrong methods, wrong sacrifice. 
Given that they don’t know what they were doing, they singlehandedly or accidentally brought a creature into this world. The bothered creature that was summoned ate the teenagers as the creature was so confused, why was he bothered in his own torture cell in hell? 
It starved for days, lost in a world that’s not familiar to him. He fed himself with every human who crosses paths with him, men, women, and children. Until it finally knew that eating humans can make him look just like them. 
The creature adapted in this world, living like a normal human and walking amongst us, still not knowing how to go home. “
Halloween many many many years ago 
“And that creature is me. Happy Halloween class, enjoy the night” Jaehyun finishes his story in front of his class. Watching every student laugh and shrug his ‘scary’ story for Halloween. They thought he was joking, and that was the fun part Jaehyun thought. 
“See you on our next session Mr. Jung” a flirty young girl waved goodbye to him, smiling like she wanted to get on her knees and suck Jaehyun's cock right then and there. 
“Enjoy Halloween” he winked back at her and proceed to fix his things and leave the classroom. 
It was exactly a decade ago when those stupid teenagers brought him to this world. He didn’t have much of a choice but to live like a normal human to save himself. Feed from their flesh, kill every two weeks and get on with life as if nothing gruesome happened inside his house. 
Jaehyun targets girls, women in their early twenties or older. He stopped eating children only because the effect on him does not stay for long. Whereas, eating older people can last two weeks max. Luring girls was never hard for Jaehyun because he’s naturally handsome, but without human flesh, he returns to the disgusting creature he used to be. 
Tinder is his go-to restaurant. A little swipe right over here, a swipe right over there, and voila! He now has a tasty dinner and for Halloween night, perfect to celebrate his existence here in this world.
As part of his adaptation in this world, he learned how to cook human meals for his victims. Feeding them good food before he eats them. In the middle of cooking in his big kitchen, his doorbell rang assuming that it’s his food that just arrived. He opened his door with a smile, welcoming the young lady inside his beautiful house, smelling her for some time during the hug. Delicious, he thought. 
“Wow. Your house is big” the clueless girl exclaims. It’s always the same, every girl who steps inside his house is always amazed at how beautiful 127 House is. It’s white interior always captures the ladies’ hearts and leave them in awe. 
“I hope you’re hungry. I made dinner for us” he gave the girl a flirty smile, flashing those cute dimples of his that always make the girls smile. 
During dinner, Jaehyun can’t rush his meal and get on with the kill already. He is patient and takes time to know what he’s about to eat. He asks a lot of questions to gain the girl’s trust and fool her that Jaehyun is actually into her. “Do you do drugs?” the most important question for the night. Jaehyun hates eating humans who do drugs because it has a side effect on him as if his body can’t handle the drugs itself that it makes him weak on the spot. So much for being a creature from hell. 
“No, I don’t do drugs. Do you?” the girl answered with wide eyes. 
“No no. I’m clean” he smiled and put his hand on the girl’s thigh. Slowly caressing it until Jaehyun reaches her damped panties. “Can you open your legs for me?” Jaehyun’s irresistible request made the girl open her legs a little wider under the table. Rolling her head side to side as she feels Jaehyun’s cold fingers brushing on her clothed clit. 
It’s time, Jaehyun thought. Dinner is served. 
He pushed the plates away, glasses clinking, utensils started to fall from the table. Jaehyun carried her and put her on the dinner table, kissing her wildly to put the girl in the mood and make her horny. It always works. While he’s busy kissing her, his hands slowly remove her panties and spread her legs a little rough and push her on the dinner table. 
“We really doing this here?” the girl asks. 
“This is the perfect place to eat you” 
The girl smiles and felt excited because a handsome man like Jaehyun is about to eat her pussy. Little did she know, that Jaehyun will quite do it literally. He planted kisses on her inner thighs, making the girl moan and tickle her in the meantime. Jaehyun runs a finger on her slit and make her legs shiver, licking his finger as if he’s having a taste of his dinner. 
“Eat me already” she protests. Jaehyun chuckled low and puts two fingers inside her before he makes a move. 
Jaehyun’s first lick from her pussy makes his head turn and breathe heavily for the girl he’s about to eat tonight tastes delicious. He licks and licks the girl, not listening to her moaning, not minding if she’s calling his name. The way he licked the girl was like he was having ice cream on a hot summer, sucking her arousal and putting pressure on her clit. Unaware of what’s happening to the girl, he didn’t care if she already came and overstimulated. Jaehyun continued licking his dinner even though the girl is pushing him already, but still having the time of her life. 
She then felt Jaehyun bite her clit and made her shout a little too loud that her voice echoed around 127 House. She propped her shoulder and saw Jaehyun’s eyes turned plain black. He smiled at her making the girl shout in horror and shout for her life but Jaehyun’s tongue is making her cum again for the second time tonight, harder than the first one she had. 
And that’s Jaehyun’s cue to eat her. Bit her off. Letting her blood pool around his dinner table. He ate her flesh by flesh, sipping every drop of her blood, chewing all her intestines, licking the flavor off her skin like an animal. He can feel himself glow as he continues to eat her. 
Pouring himself a glass of his favorite wine, he looks at his reflection through the goblet and admires his handsomeness. Skin clearer as ever, eyes without dark circles, firm ass. He smiled to himself as he feels much more alive and young now. Jaehyun went back to the dead body on his table, kissing the girl on the cheek and thanking her for making him handsome.  
That is Jaehyun’s life for the past decade. Murder to survive, eat humans, earn money, and repeat it. No thrill. Even getting caught is no fun for him because he can easily eat the witness. But living in this world full of emotions and Jaehyun is indeed a curious demon, he wanted to try to fall in love. Maybe he wants it because he’s been eating girls who are desperate for love and that’s making him desperate too. You see when he eats humans, he eats their emotions too and in that way, he learned feeling things. Anger, fear, happiness. All kinds. 
Three weeks after Halloween, he found this one of a kind service that he’s very much interested in. Just like every other human who likes their food clean, Jaehyun likes his human clean too. 
We offer house services just contact us and book someone you prefer. We guarantee clean and respectful girls....
Reading the brochure of that sex club who offers special services is like reading a menu in an expensive restaurant. Maybe it’s time to give up Tinder, stop ordering cheap food, and start feeding on expensive ones.
Just in time for his feeding again, the university kept him busy and so he did not have time to eat and settle for human food instead. That’s why he looks awful now. His hair is starting to fall out, his fair skin has acne, dark circles under his eyes, some of his toenails are falling off. He’s becoming weak, and he needs to eat soon.
“Y/n honey, you have a schedule for tonight. A big spender this one.... huh. He paid an overnight promo and even gave you a tip. Wow he’s rich” 
As you listen more of the details from the lady at the front desks, you thanked the man mentally who gave you a generous tip that will go straight to your savings, rent, and water bill. Not that you love this job of yours, but you’re excited to meet the big spender and treat him well just so he can get his money’s worth.
While you were drying your hair, you heard your phone ding and it was from your client whom you look forward to meeting. “I’ll send an uber from your house to mine. See you later” it was a bit cold but usually, your clients will just send you the address and it’s your duty not to be late for the appointment. You smiled because he seems so thoughtful and a real gentleman, you became more excited about meeting him and looking forward to the sex.
When the uber driver dropped you off in front of a big white house, you thought that maybe it was a mistake that your date must have pinned the wrong address. You rang the doorbell just to make things sure. Asking never killed anybody. You wait for someone to open the door to you, biting your lower lip while scanning the outside of the beautiful house. 
“You must be Y/n” the man who opened the door said. Well, that makes things official. You’re in the right place. 
“Yes...uhh, sir Yoonoh?” his weak state is bothering you. He doesn’t look like he can fuck at all.
“Please call me Jaehyun. Yoonoh is my alias. Come in” 
The handsome man welcomes you warmly in his home, taking your coat and putting it in a cabinet near his door. He looks handsome but exhausted, coughing a little as he closes the cabinet door. “Are you okay? You look sick” you blurted out and your first words made the man smile. Different. You’re different. You don’t care how big the house is he thought, the first thing you did is care about him. “I’m fine. The weather has been affecting me lately but, I’m good. I hope you’re hungry, I made early dinner” He gave you a weak smile and coughed again. 
This customer of yours continues to surprise you. First the uber ride and now the early dinner. For the first time in your life, this wretched job doesn’t feel like a job at all. Jaehyun here made you feel like you’re here for a date and not just to fuck the whole night. You follow him to the kitchen to help him get the meals that he prepared for both of you. As much as you’re amazed by his cooking skills, you are more amazed by how he managed to cook a decent meal even though he’s weak. 
Jaehyun started small talk, as usual. Asking you questions before he kills you and making sure you don’t do drugs even though it’s stated clearly that the sex club has clean girls. He made you comfortable the whole dinner time and made sure you enjoy what he cooked for you. 
“What do you do outside this job of yours?” Jaehyun asked, cutting a piece of steak as he waits for your answer. 
“Nothing. I’m lifeless” you joked, “I take care of myself and save as much as I can so I can have a clean start, which reminds me thank you for the generous tip” 
When the air was finally dead, he put his hand on your knee, caress it softly until his hand reaches your upper thigh. You felt his hand shaking like he’s shivering but he’s not telling you. It seems like he’s forcing himself to push through having sex just so his money doesn’t go to waste. But you can’t let him. The man is obviously weak and sick, he will not enjoy the pleasure and his money’s worth. 
To his surprise, you cup his face and shook your head ‘no’. “We don’t have to do this today. We’ll end up being sick together on the next day, want that to happen?” he shook his head to answer your question, “I promise I won't tell the club and I will find a way for you to get what you paid for. The dinner is delicious by the way what herbs did you put here?” 
So much care for someone who kills to survive. He doesn't deserve any of your kindness. The demon is completely moved. When you were the one who initiated the small talk, Jaehyun realized how he loved sharing things that he does. Like how he likes his steak perfectly well done, he likes his alcohol old and cold, even told you that listening to Chet Baker while drinking wine is his favorite thing in the world. Talking too much about himself was never his thing when it comes to talking to his victims. Then he realized maybe you’re not one of them, that maybe for the first time he had a visitor comforting him instead of making him full. 
You were the first person who listened to him. His first friend.
Talking and sharing personal stuff with one of your clients was a big ‘no’ for you. But there’s something about Jaehyun that makes you feel that your secrets are safe with him, even though all you knew about him is his love for music and wine. As the night goes deeper, you two are still talking about random stuff and laughing loudly whenever something funny came up. It was nice. You caught yourself resting your head on his weak shoulders and loved his warmth. Hearing his soft voice near your ear is almost addicting even though he sounded weak. And seeing his smile up close and poking his dimples whenever you want to is a different kind of privilege. The night went on until you fall asleep on his shoulders, unconsciously hugging him like a teddy bear and putting your leg on top of his like you’ve known each other for so long.  
He was thinking deeply if he’s going to eat you or not. You are juicy for his taste, like a turkey on Thanksgiving. He removed some of your hair from your face, patting and caressing your head so he knows you’re in deep sleep. Carefully, he reached for your hand and played with your fingers, smelling it and still thinking it through. He put your pointer finger in his mouth, sucking it like a lollipop and tasting your flavor through your skin. You taste so good that his eyes turned into his demon eyes and his demon tongue is ready to taste more of you. But you smiled through the feeling of his tongue swirling around your finger and came closer to him. Unconsciously and still sleeping soundly.
He remembers how your kindness moved him, and how he felt important for the first time in his whole existence. Jaehyun shook his head and stopped attempting to eat you, wiped your fingers, and intertwined his fingers with yours instead. It’s weird how he’s so hungry but he can’t seem to kill you. 
To survive, Jaehyun went to the nearest bar and lured a hooker whom he killed in the back of his house. It was his first time killing quietly in his premisses, careful not to wake you up. Even though the human that he just ate doesn’t taste good, well, he just had to look presentable in your eyes the next morning.
When you wake up, you almost jumped out of bed because you thought you were in bed with a total stranger but turns out it was just Jaehyun. His skin is glowing under the morning sunlight, his cute snores make you smile, fucking pink lips begging to be kissed or it’s you who’s begging to be kissed… you smiled and brushed his hair away, accidentally waking the handsome man. 
“Morning” he murmured, pulling you for a hug and closing his eyes again but he was smiling. 
Even his breath smell nice, “feeling okay now?” you asked softly, not ruining the peaceful morning and nervously smiling brightly because the butterflies in your tummy won’t stop flapping their wings. 
“Yes. All thanks to you” he opened his eyes and admired your beauty. He can feel his heart thumping. “I think I owe you something” he kissed your lips passionately and pull your body above him making you put both your legs on his sides. He never left your lips as his hands roam on your sides requesting to remove your dress. With one swift move, you’re on top of the handsome man with your matching lacy underwear, bodies grinding on each other, moaning deliciously, and about to have morning sex. “I’ve seen a lot of naked girls before but none of them made me horny like you do” you giggle at what he said, if every client you had is like Jaehyun, you don’t mind staying on this wretched job forever. 
It’s not that Jaehyun is a virgin. This is just his first time having sex without killing the one he’s fucking. Watching you cum above and underneath him without going in for the kill was satisfying and almost addicting. Not to mention that your walls feel amazing around his cock. Warm and tight that he never wants to pull out from you. 
You, on the other hand, is so surprised by how Jaehyun is so great in bed like he was craving sex. Every lustful thrust he gives makes you gasp and it just takes your breath away. The way he held your leg up, fuck you deep that you’re skin to skin, makes you claw his back and grip the sheets so tightly that you hurt your hand. He never slowed down but he was not rough enough, he was making you feel good the whole fucking time that you made sounds you never thought you’re capable of. On top of that, his sweet words are making you feel things. 
After the most amazing sex you both have in your entire life, he can’t let go of you even just for a second. He’s glued to your body while you make him breakfast, “Can I see you more in my clothes?” he whispered behind your ear, hands resting on the side of your waist while he distracts you with his kisses, blowing cold air on your nape to tickle you and make you giggle. 
And when it’s time to go, he was begging you with all his might to stay. “I have to work, Jae” it’s true. And being with Jaehyun made you forget that you’re here for work, he completely changed that. If it wasn’t for your work you will give in and stay. 
“Okay, okay. I understand. Have dinner with me this weekend? I’ll cook for you again, I’ll make it up to you” to be honest, he was afraid you might not come back here.
“Mhmm. I’d love to” you left a soft kiss on his cheek and opened his door. You are the first person who steps inside his house that comes out alive and well. 
As you leave Jaehyun in his house, he was quick to call the sex club again and book you for tonight. The service was really expensive but as he talks to the person in charge of your schedule, you were worth every dime of his hard earned money from the university.
Happy about how your schedule with Jaehyun went, and happy that you met him, your friend from the front desks informed you of your new client for tonight and you screamed because of too much happiness when he used his real name to book you.
When you got home to prepare for yet another night with Jaehyun, you’ve never been so excited about meeting a client for the second time around. Thinking about how his lips travel in between the valley of your boobs the other night, that sweet handsome smile whenever he catches you looking at him, the way he makes your heart flutter during breakfast with his sweet words. This is definitely a good start to give love a chance and you’re stupid if you let something like this slip from your hands.
When the most awaited time finally came, Jaehyun was over the moon and blushing like crazy when he saw you again at his doorstep. This time, it’s not food he sees but a woman who will love him and will change his life. And if you used to smell so tasty and delicious for Jaehyun well now, you smell like love and new beginnings for him. You were the epitome of change, stepping into his house and in his whole life. 
Your second night together was a hundred times better than the first even if it’s storming like crazy outside. It’s like going on an indoor date with Jaehyun, eating a delicious dinner, and drinking good wine together. Rather than having sex the whole evening, you and Jaehyun spend the night cuddling on his huge couch. Talking about life under a cozy blanket that he owns, creating your own special warmth.
“What if you became broke because of me?” you asked and snuggled closely. 
“Hmm. Well, then I just have to work more. Get five jobs” he joked but he sounded serious. 
“My job will be a great problem if we continue this. I don’t want to hurt you-“ 
“Hey, no one is hurting anyone. I respect your line of work and I understand the reason why you’re doing it. Until then I just have to wait for you just like the other guys. I have long patience, it’s not a problem” Jaehyun says and boops your nose.
And that is the start of your new life with Jaehyun. Your life is all about him and he is all about you. Days turned to weeks, weeks turned to months. Jaehyun is still in love with the same woman who rang his doorbell and cared for him for the first time in his life. After a few months of looking for a job that does not include having sex with different men, you finally left the club and go home to Jaehyun every day. 
Peaceful and quiet mornings are now replaced by Jaehyun’s disturbing kisses while you make him coffee. Leaving each other for work during the morning has been your daily struggle. But the promise of seeing each other at the end of the day is something so hard but worth it in the end.
Slowly, you changed each other’s lives. Loving each other deeply more and more, trying new things together, and loving life even when it’s incredibly tough sometimes. It was more than just flirting with each other, going on dates, and having a lot of sex.  
Saying that he’s in love with you and showing it every day is still not enough for Jaehyun to prove you his love. He loves you so much that for the first time in his life he doesn’t want to go back to where he came from anymore. He wants to stay here with you. Live happily, marry you someday, have kids, and be with you until your dying breath. 
“Why do you want so many kids?” you asked, drawing small circles on his toned chest while his right arm is securely wrapped around you.
“Kids are great especially when we are the ones who made them. Don’t you think?” He reached for your lips and kissed you. 
“Promise me you’ll be a great dad. And you will never leave me or- or our future children alone. You’re a great man Jaehyun and my heart will break in a million pieces if you hurt me too like my dad” you were so full of emotions. You remember how your father left you and your family and it made your mother suffer. Jaehyun was quiet and he listened to you. Your feelings were so important to him so he did not dare interrupt and waited for you to finish. 
“We will be happy, I promise. Watch me love you every day and fulfill all my promises to you”
The problem is... he can't tell you the truth about himself. Jaehyun is scared to the bone that you might not accept him. The truth about him is never easy to accept and he doesn’t want to give you that burden. Having a demon eating humans to survive is something unacceptable even when love is already involved. But he has faith in you. Someday, maybe he will be brave enough to tell you. But not now. 
Dating you made his feeding a little hard because it’s basically cheating. He loves you so much that he despises being a demon and eating humans just to stay alive. Sometimes, he starves himself that he trie so hard to live on raw meat but it only lasts a few hours and it frustrates him greatly. He doesn’t want to meet other girls anymore and pretend that he’s interested in them, he wanted so bad to stop using Tinder. But he can’t. You don’t deserve a demon like him but he loves you and he’s sorry. 
Even though you don’t know anything about Jaehyun’s real being, he never hurt you like one of your exes and he’s much a greater man than all of those jerks combined. He is the only man you see your future with, growing old together, having coffee on your porch, racking your chairs, and hopefully die together. Your heart can’t take it if Jaehyun dies before you. That’s how much you love him. 
Four years ago
After a tiring day at the office, you’re so thankful that your house is quiet and peaceful, away from the noise of the city. You went straight to the bathroom, prepared the tub, and treat yourself to a nice warm bath with a glass of wine on the side. 
“Y/n, you home?” Jaehyun put his keys on the table next to the entrance and removed his coat. He just came back from burying the bones of the three girls he just ate at the back of 127 House. Tricked them into having a foursome but even before they could remove their clothes, Jaehyun killed them already and ate them all until their bones are clean and easy to bury.
“In here” you shout while you put more bubbles in the tub. Jaehyun soon appeared and leaned on the bathroom door. “I just got home from work baby, hows the university?” you invited him inside and he greets you with a kiss on the cheek and proceeds to strip in front of you. For a university teacher, your boyfriend sure does look so hot. 
“Nothing special. Students flirting with me, then I fail them” he giggles and joins you in the tub. Sitting behind you and pulling you against his strong chest. He plays with your wedding ring and intertwines his fingers with yours. Home is where Jaehyun is. He is the best thing about this house, coming home to him and enjoy this little world. 
It was a silent moment for the two of you but you can hear him thanking you for staying in his life. Jaehyun’s eyes screams ‘i love you’ whenever he’s quiet and smirking liking this. 
“Why are you always like that. You know you can always say it. Three words Jae, I love you. Were married already and you never said it to me-“ 
“But I always show it to you” he giggles and puts bubbles on top of your head and your cheeks, laughing because you look funny. “You will get sick of me if I start telling you those words. That’s why I show you instead. Those are powerful words Y/n, I’m saving it. Trust me, once I told you those words, you will fall in love with me. Again” he winked at you and you rolled your eyes at him. Facing him completely to clean him up.
“Do you fall in love with me over and over again whenever I tell you, I love you?” you asked. Looking in his eyes and brushing your wet lips on his. Touching. But not kissing. You can feel your boyfriend’s heartbeat so fast as you wait for his answer. 
“Every time. Like you just walked into this house for the first time again” he smiled and flashed those cute dimples of his and kissed you down the tub until the water overflows and the candles are one by one dying because of the waters splashing.  
Two years of happily dating through ups and downs. And two years of being happily married and you still don’t know what you did to deserve someone like Jaehyun. He’s beyond perfect. Like someone made him as a character in a book and poof he became real and find his way to you. “I love you” you whisper. And even though you won’t get a response, you know that Jaehyun does love you too. 
One day, your boss made you left work early because he wanted you to go overtime the next day. So you did. You wanted to surprise your husband with his favorite take-out and spend a nice dinner with him. When you arrived in his driveway, you see his car badly parked on his huge lawn. You made your way quietly inside the house and went straight to the kitchen to put the food on the counter. 
You heard continuous thumps upstairs, not quite sure from which room. As you walked towards the stairs, you heard another thump followed by a high pitched moan and, “Jaehyun! Don’t stop!” then another thump. At first, you didn’t want to walk further closer to the room where you believe Jaehyun is fucking someone because you didn’t want to see it. But you are his wife and you have every right to call him out even though it hurts you so much knowing that Jaehyun is capable of cheating. You can’t believe it. 
As you peek at the door from his study room, you watch Jaehyun eat a girl’s pussy on his table. She looked young. Younger than you and maybe that’s why he cheated. The girl is very much overstimulated and can’t stay put so Jaehyun roughly holds her down while keeping her legs open. You watch Jaehyun hold her so harshly and wonder if your husband has always been into rough sex, “ouch!” she says loudly. 
Jaehyun stopped licking her and proceeds to kiss her neck. At this point, you don’t know why you’re still watching your husband cheat when everything is all clear. 
“FUCK!!!!!” 
Hearing the girl scream like that made you stop from shouting and calling your husband a cheater. Because, lo and behold you witnessed your husband murder her. Biting her by the neck and choking her down so her body won't slip off his table. You gasped sharply when you saw Jaehyun ripped her stomach and reach in for her intestines. Covering your mouth with both of your hands as you can’t believe what you were watching. You would rather face the problem of your husband cheating on you, but murder? Devilry? Seeing him became a creature eating a human felt like you’re watching a horror movie and made you think that you don’t know Jaehyun anymore. Or did you ever? 
As you watch him eat her and be scared for your life, you notice that Jaehyun’s face is slowly changing… “This can’t be” you murmured and fainted hitting your head first, making Jaehyun turn around with shock. Jaehyun didn’t know what to do. Usually, he eats the witness too but this time he can’t. Of course, he can’t eat you. 
 Every bit of the truth was too much for you. Even when you know that he is sincere with everything that he says to you about his true being. 
You married a demon. How can Jaehyun expect you to accept this? 
“Well, what did you want me to tell you? ‘I’m a demon and I eat humans to survive?’ I’m telling you now and you won't even look at me” Jaehyun was so frustrated already. It’s been a week since he told you the truth and to be honest he doesn’t know what you want him to do or to hear from him.  
“It hurts me to see you all scared and disgusted to me, baby. I'm not forcing you to be with me and stay- but fuck I’m still Jaehyun. My feelings for you are true and my love for you is undying. Please don’t do this to us and don’t do this to yourself. You can leave, but please think about our years together” he kissed you on your temple and noticed that your grip on the knife is so tight that your hand is already shaking. Tears fall down your cheeks and you don’t know what it's made of. Was it because you’re scared? Heartbroken? Or confused because you don’t know what to do. 
You love him but you’re scared. And that thought alone can make your knees weak and your mind go crazy. 
Since you knew about the truth, your marriage went downhill and the house became cold and unwelcoming. A once fire burning relationship is now cold as ice. You decided to leave Jaehyun even when you made a promise to him. To have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part. 
For you, leaving was a mixture of loneliness, heartbreak, and disappointment. But for Jaehyun, he was lost, miserable, and incomplete. He wanted to starve himself and never eat humans from now on but he still wants to live for you. Hope and wait for you to come back in his life. 
After leaving Jaehyun, you took care of yourself and went to therapy. But a few days after, you found out that you’re pregnant for almost two weeks already and once again you feel cheated in life because you could have had a family of your own and be happy in life. Just how you and Jaehyun planned it to be.   
It’s Halloween tonight and Jaehyun just finished eating. He has no appetite, to be honest, and only ate a pair of arms. Then that’s it. He can’t eat the human further, still weak, and still looked like shit. He’s cleaning the mess he made on the kitchen counter, dumping a half-eaten body in a trash bag, and scrubbing blood off the floor when his doorbell rang and expected trick or treaters. He brought the bowl of candies with him, head towards the door, and opened it with a smile. But his smile was soon gone when he saw you on his doorstep, completely clueless on what to do because he wanted to hug and kiss you but he can’t. 
“I shouldn’t have left you-“ 
Glass and candies shattered on the floor and neither one of you cared. Jaehyun hugged you tightly and apologized over and over again while he showers you with kisses. Smiling so brightly but both of you have heavy tears in your eyes. 
The feeling of entering his house for the first time again after leaving him for only two weeks almost felt like the very first time. “Are you okay? You look sick” you worry for your husband and it made you feel like a shitty wife because you didn’t even consider his feelings. He was struggling too. 
“Welcome home” Jaehyun sobs and pull you inside the house. He kissed you deeply and showed you how much he misses you, lifting you, and bringing you to your shared bedroom with all the strength he has left. 
He removed your clothes and his clothes without leaving your lips which he missed kissing. You kept your eyes closed until you’re ready to open them again because you can’t help but see the demon who’s eating humans to survive. “It’s still me” Jaehyun whispers, kissing your hand and intertwining his fingers with yours. “Nothings changed, baby. I’m still the Jaehyun who paid the sex club just so I can spend time with you” he waits patiently for you to open your eyes, hoping that makeup sex will somehow fix your marriage again. You wrapped your arms around him when you feel him go in between your legs.
Slowly, you open your eyes and breathe in and out. “I’m pregnant” you whisper back, kissing him softly. He did not say anything but you know that Jaehyun is more than happy to hear the news. 
“Is that why you came back? You want us to be a family?” he smiles and you answer with a quick nod. He kisses your neck all the way to your jaw, down to the valley between your boobs, and ends up in front of your pussy. At first, he was hesitating and kept on kissing your inner thighs but you seem eager, you roll hips continuously waiting for Jaehyun to make a move. 
“Oooohh-” you moan out so deliciously, holding Jaehyun’s head in between your legs, raking his hair and tugging his locks every now and then. Before you even cum he stopped eating you out and went back to your lips. He ate you so good that you can taste yourself through his lips. He lines his cock and watches it disappear as he pushes deep inside you. You gasped and breathed heavily, gripping the sheets more when he starts drawing circles on your clit sinfully. He missed how your walls feel around him, biting his lower lip as he doubles his pace and dive in pleasure head first.  
You reached for Jaehyun’s lips when you hit your high and asked him to, “Slow down. I want to savor you” he giggled and followed your request, kissing you more as he slowly fucks you while you enjoy your high and until he catches his own. He noticed there’s tears in your eyes when he pulled out and asked you, “what’s wrong baby? Talk to me” he kept you close to his tired and weak body, covering you both with the thick duvet and enjoying this special warmth. 
“I’m sorry for distancing myself Jae, I’m sorry for leaving you” He can’t forgive himself hearing you apologize to him when it’s his fault your marriage was ruined. Jaehyun told you that he will stop eating humans until he finds an alternative. And to make things lighter, he thought of baby names until you two fall asleep in each other’s arms. 
The plan worked. 
When Jaehyun was in deep sleep, you went downstairs to get a knife. The sharpest one that can slit his throat in one go and bravely go on with your plan on killing your husband. As you placed the sharp knife on Jaehyun’s throat, it was so sharp that he is cut already and it woke him up. 
Jaehyun opened his eyes and see you holding a knife on his throat, tears falling from your eyes, and obviously hesitating if you’re going to do it. Your husband saw your struggle. The deep shit he put you through. You don’t deserve any of this. If being dead can bring you peace in his life and healing, then so be it.
“It’s okay” he calms you down and holds your wrist, gripping the knife with you. His hand feels cold already. “burn the house and don’t let anyone see you leave here so you won't be accused over anything. I love you and I'm sorry” 
It was the first time you heard those three words from Jaehyun and he was right. You remembered how much you love him like waking up in an awful curse but you’re too late. Jaehyun slit his own throat while still holding the knife with you. 
Regret hit you like a train and all you can do is cry over Jaehyun’s dead body. 
The sun is almost up and you can’t be seen leaving 127 House because there are two dead bodies in this house. You kissed Jaehyun’s corpse and removed his wedding ring from his finger. The only thing that will prove he existed in your life.  
You used the gasoline for the barbecue party scheduled before Christmas, sobbed uncontrollably as you think all the memories you had with Jaehyun. His weak smile during the night you first met him, the first time his lips touched yours, all the plans and dreams you both had, how Jaehyun is always full of life when it comes to planning on having a baby… 
But you killed him. And you’re about to burn the house and all the memories it holds like it’s just an unwanted photograph. After lighting the match, you drove away from the house as far as you can crying while you focus on the road and trying to find your way back to your old apartment. 
As the sun goes up and slowly light up the sky, the image of 127 House burning flashes in front of your eyes and it made you pull over on the side road and take your time to cry. You feel Jaehyun’s cold lips on yours as you imagine his body being eaten by fire. 
Halloween present time 
“But did the demon really died mommy?” your daughter asked. Eager to hear the answer to her question. Until now telling her the story about Jaehyun, without the gory details and sex part of course, still gives you goosebumps. “You never answer my question. You’ve been telling me this story since I was six, I’m nine years old now. Please please please, answer the question” she added. 
“Wow look who we have here” he knocked before coming in, “can I come in princess?” 
“Of course daddy. Mommy, won’t tell me the ending of the demon eating-human” your daughter whines. You and Jaehyun just laughed at her and snuggled all together in her small bed. 
“He didn’t. Now, will you please sleep?” he strokes his daughter’s soft hair, “mommy is tired already and I’m here to get her. Can I?” 
“How can you be so sure he didn’t die?” you and Jaehyun groaned together. 
“Okay. That’s it good night. No more stories. We love you, sleep well okay?” Jaehyun used his fatherly might and stopped his own daughter from bugging you both. She’s quite a handful sometimes. You and Jaehyun gave her a good night kiss and left her to sleep. 
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EXPLANATION
Jaehyun got out from the fire because he’s a demon and demons are immune from fire. He is a smart demon (btw he’s a university professor) so he found the reader again and incase you missed it, the reader regrets it because he loves Jaehyun so much. 
Check the comments section for other answered questions. 
Thank you for reading! 
2K notes · View notes
katesbridgerton · 3 years ago
Note
Hi! Here's some dialogue prompts if you like,
"Well last time that worked."
"It's only illegal if we get caught."
"Please don't go."
Or some situational prompts,
Walking through a Halloween haunted forest
Accidentally crashing a party or wedding
Having a food fight
All for Kaysanova, no pressure, just have some fun if one of these sparks anything 💜
Hi, Anon! Thank you so much for sending prompts. I wrote a little something and I hope you enjoy. ⭐
"Please don't go," Joe says, the tip of his nose is touching Nicky's cold cheek; Joe has been holding his body since they have arrived from the mission. "I can't do this without you," he whispers, the tears that had stopped just a few seconds ago are now falling again.
It's been 24 hours and no signs that Nicky is healing. One bullet went straight into his heart and the other was allocated in his brain. Everyone doubts Nicky will make out of it alive, but not Joe. Joe knows he will come back, because he promised back then, centuries ago, after their first night together that they wouldn't leave each other. And Joe believes in Nicky, Nicky never lied to him.
After four days, Joe already died at least three times next to his beloved; he is not getting up to eat or drink water no matter how many times Andy, Nile and Booker knock on the door of their room. 
"I hate you. I hate you for putting yourself in front of Andy and I hate Andy for getting inside that building even though she's now mortal," he sniffles, hiding his face on Nicky's t-shirt. "I can't watch this, ya amar. I can't watch you leave. I'm sorry for being so weak."
He stands up, makes a bag with Nicky's clothes — because they smell like him — and writes a note to leave on the bedside table.
We promised we would wait a year for each other. Please. This is my only request. Do not bury or burn him. Joe.
It's a lie. They had promised they would wait a month, but now Joe can't help himself. A month is nothing, what if Nicky doesn’t wake up? Joe leaves the house in the middle of the night because he can't look at Andy without feeling anger, he can't look at Nicky without hating him and he doesn't want those feelings. 
He really doesn't. He's not entitled to them. No matter how much his heart is shattered. 
They were in Italy when it happened. Nicky died at home, and now Joe is left without one. That's his first thought when he is showering in their place in Malta; the hot water is hitting his back muscles as he cries for his lost lover. When he leaves, he dresses himself with one of Nicky’s clothes and goes to bed — he still doesn't bother to eat, or to drink water, no matter how much he craves for it. The rain outside makes his entire body shiver, not because it's cold, but because he wishes he was holding Nicky. 
They both loved staying in bed on rainy days.
When Joe dies that night, he wakes up knowing exactly what he's going to do the next morning. He sits down slowly, blinks, and almost falls when he tries to stand up; leaning against the walls, he arrives at the kitchen, opens a can of soup — Nicky is probably cursing him wherever he is — and eats it slowly while drinking a glass of water. He needs to be strong enough to walk tomorrow.
Joe wakes up early on the next day, around six in the morning, and walks out of the house leaving behind a note on Nicky's pillow. The hike to the cliff has memories all over it, stolen kisses, laughs, hugs and even a pig back ride when Joe was too sleepy to function. He stops and smiles, before continuing his journey
"I was thinking about Malta," "What time in Malta?" "..." "Oh, THAT time in Malta."
Nicky proposed to him for the first time on the top of this cliff. The place where Joe is standing now. After the proposal, Joe remembers so vividly, they went back to their house and had one of the best nights of their lives. And every night was perfect with Nicky, so that says a lot.
Nothing makes sense anymore. Not now. Not without Nicky and if Joe can't endure a life on earth, maybe he can under the sea. He takes one step forward without thinking twice, and then another until he's falling.
He let himself sink, and as his lungs are slowly filled with water, the last thing he sees is Nicky’s eyes. If he's lucky enough, this will be his last death.
Joe wakes up naked and wrapped in a blanket, in their bed. He hears a way too familiar voice coming from the living room.
"Yes, I'm with him. We're staying here, boss. Call you tomorrow." 
"Nicky?" Joe's voice is weak when he calls the name, then he stands up, bringing the blanket along to warm him up. "Nicolò?" 
The green eyes meet his brown ones and he doesn't even have time to process what's happening before being pulled to Nicky’s arms. It smells like Nicky, it looks like Nicky, it holds him like Nicky, but-
His thoughts are interrupted when long hands cup his face and pull him to a kiss.
It tastes like Nicky. When Joe is about to open space to a way Nicky’s tongue knows too well, he falls on his knees.
An illusion, of course. Because Nicky is- Nicky is dead. The ghost kneels in front of him and gently repeats his previous movements, kissing Joe slowly. Joe is not sure of what's true or not anymore, the sensation of their mouths together is too real to be just a hallucination. 
"Sono qui," Nicky whispers against his lips. "You're still awfully weak. I don't even want to think about what you did, my love. All the pain you went through. I made you a proper dinner."
"Nicolò," he cries, hiding his face on Nicky's neck and allowing himself to be held. 
Nicky is nothing but patient, he sits on the floor, opens his legs and gives Joe enough space to sit in the middle and snuggle against his chest. Joe doesn't know how long they stay there, and he could have stayed more if his stomach had not complained.
"Food is ready, but I know my husband very well, so shower first," Nicky smiles and stands up, helping Joe to do the same.
Joe doesn't move while Nicky is bathing him, he doesn't even blink because he's too scared that if he does the sensation of Nicky’s hands on his body will disappear. 
"One year, um," Nicky laughs, kissing Joe's neck. "I would have done the same."
"No, you wouldn't. You're more rational. More practical."
"Not when it comes to you, habibi. Never when it comes to you."
"When did you-" Joe finally turns to stare at his husband. 
"Two days ago. I'm not healing slower, I did hurt myself before and everything is normal. I guess the type of wound," he shakes his head. "You jumped."
Joe nods. 
"What if I hadn't gotten there in time, habibi?" Nicky pulls him by the waist, their bodies touching everywhere; Joe rests their foreheads together.
"But you did," Joe whispers. "You did."
"Let's eat something now? You really need it. I'm going to be there, I'm going to hold your hand, I'm never leaving you again. This is a promise."
The food smells delicious, it's one of Joe's favourite dishes, but when the plate is full in front of him, he can't bring himself to let go of Nicky’s hand; their fingers are intertwined and he never wants to let go. He will never let go, because if he does, Nicky might die again.
He only notices he's crying when Nicky’s free hand wipes the tears away. And after that, without asking, he starts to feed Joe. Joe wants to say it's not necessary, that he can do it alone, but he's too focused on the sensation of his husband’s warm skin against his. He can't really do anything else.
"Thank you, habibi," he whispers.
"Not the first time. Won't be the last," Nicky smiles. "Are you cold, my love? You're still shaking."
"I hated you," Joe admits, biting his lower lip so hard that he can taste blood. "I hated you so much," the tears start to fall (one more time). Nicky doesn't interrupt him. "I hated Andy. I was so angry. I hated you more than when I did in the Crusades," he admits. "I don't want to eat anymore." 
"It's ok. Do you want to go to bed?" 
Joe shakes his head. He doesn't want to sleep. He doesn't want to close his eyes and miss Nicky.
"Let's go to the couch."
Nicky is the smartest person Joe knows, there are blankets waiting for him and a pillow; he can't really fight when Nicky tucks him in, because 1) he's too weak; 2) he'll do anything Nick wants.
Nicky sits on the floor, in front of him, he still didn't let go of Joe's hand. Or vice versa. Joe doubts he is giving any other choice.
"You're going to sleep and when you wake up in the morning, I'm going to be here with you. You need to rest."
"The rings," Joe mentions. "You're still wearing them."
"Your rings? Of course. Your necklace too."
Joe had left the items behind because in case Nicky was really gone, Joe wanted him to have something material that belonged to him.
"You didn’t leave your wedding ring. Tell me why," Nicky kisses the ring on Joe's finger.
"Because I'm always going to be married to you. It doesn't really matter if you're alive or not."
"I'm going to be here tomorrow morning. And the day after and until you grow old and get tired of me."
"It's never going to happen."
"Please believe in me," Nicky begs. "I need you to rest."
Joe can't tell if it’s Nicky’s wish or his own tiredness, but he eventually falls asleep. He wakes up startled in the next morning, scared even. It’s when his eyes find Nicky’s.
"I brought you to bed so we could stay together. You were very agitated during the night. Very unlike you," Nicky touches his cheek. "We're staying here, Joe."
"I like that," Joe smiles.
"No. Not in bed. We're staying in Malta. It's over for us. The missions."
"What? But Nicky, you-"
"If it were you," Nicky closes his eyes and when he opens them again, Joe sees a mix of fear and anger. "No. You’re never going through that again. I'm never going to watch you heal again. You threw yourself off a cliff!" he raises his voice a bit. "It's over for me. Unless you disagree, of course."
"There's nothing I want more than to just be with you. I don't want to watch you die again either. I don't want- it's over. It's the end for us." 
Nicky smiles. 
"It's just the beginning for us," he whispers against Joe's lips before kissing him.
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taeyongfmd · 2 years ago
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below the cut is an ash update / overview / plot call for the fourth quarter. like this, reply, or message me if you’d like to plot based on this and we can get something going!
overview
ash is a boring man who lives in his studio and doesn’t do anything exciting. 
i wish i was kidding
um, but basically now that polaris’s tour is over (or over after their encore concerts), he’s just focused on writing music. it’s mostly for himself and his upcoming next album, which i guess he’ll be finished writing soon.
he’s sort of kept it to himself and not shared too much with dimensions so that they can’t put deadlines on him and pressure him too much. after his two hiatuses, i think they’re more hesitant to try to force him to do too much anyway lmao. he’s dropped one single off of the album and has another confirmed for release in november tho, so there is some pressure. it’s a new chapter, but also a continuation of blacklight so he’s trying not to worry too much about how it will be received
he hates dynamite more by the day and does not want anyone to mention it in his presence
when he first heard the demo of the final version, he was like ,,, well this is kind of empty and generic. but now that it’s become their most successful song they’ve ever released, he full out hates it. yes, he has a melody credit on it. yes, the royalties are good. no, he does not want to acknowledge it exists.
so he’s pretty unhappy with polaris right now and just hopes their next song is better and more successful to overshadow dynamite. torn between wanting to write stuff to submit for that and giving up because they might take something from it and warp it into dynamite 2.0 anyway
he honestly doesn’t have a ton going on claim-wise this quarter. he’s going to tour after his next album release but i still have to claim that before i can really write anything about it
he’ll be participating in the culture complex stuff only as much as he’s pushed to (which can be anything i need for him for plotting reasons lmao). he simply does Not care abt it. he is doing the mini-concert though because that’s one thing he actually likes to do
plots
if anyone has ever hated a song their group put out with the passion of 10000 suns, they can commiserate with him over his growing resentment toward dynamite. it’s not like polaris hasn’t had songs he didn’t like before, their whole debut era exists for one and he resented boy with luv for what it symbolized to him, but he’s never resented one quite as much as dynamite.
someone can run into him at the pre-opening party and try to make his time a liiiitle less miserable. he’s just not a fan of networking and socializing.
though i refuse to have my muses ever acknowledge the other exists, he’ll honestly probably go to mirae’s halloween party, or some other halloween party with a similar vibe. ash gets messy at those kinds of parties so it’s possible he almost throws up on someone’s shoes or randomly starts crying in the middle of conversation with someone that gets a little too deep or keeps going on about how he loves someone’s song and can’t take a hint
i’m still debating about a workshop for him, but he’s open for a possible dual host one. honestly, he probably would only be interested in doing one on songwriting or producing or maybe playing an instrument? singing or dancing would be possibilities, but i see those being more interesting for him if it’s someone with a different style or experience to him.
ash is actually free on new year’s eve for once! that’s super rare for him, so he might invite a close friend over or even end up at some nye party? also equally possible he resigns to spending it alone but someone finds out and is like, hey!! you can’t ring in the new year alone!! (please). he could also run into someone else alone on new years if he like . goes for a walk or something . idk
i kind of really want ash’s blind date plot (’nobody’) filled just to push him to not shun all chances to connect with someone, even as a friend, and maybe make a little bit of progress in that area since he’s kind of alone without many/any close people in his life rn and it’s his own fault :( (the plot doesn’t have to develop as romantic in nature, it’s just under the intimate category since it’s a blind date)
ash’s birthday is on december 24. he’s planning to spend it alone probably because that’s always his plan but someone can force him out of his self-pity exile. he��d probably be equally find with going out or staying in if he doesn’t have to spend it alone lmao (ash likes being alone but being alone on his birthday just makes him feel pathetic)
he’s always available to talk potential music production and features on other muses’ music too
idk, i’m open to ideas as well. i think he has fewer active plots than mirae right now which is probably a first lmao
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