#because i keep flipping in between wanting one thing vs another

[thatweirdtranny]

i’m so annoyed at myself for constantly flipping between wanting phalloplasty and wanting metoidioplasty

[oh-no-its-bird]

Staring into the void thinking about my unloved little guy favorites and feeling the thoughts mix with my adoration for stupid niche crossovers. I want a svsss x Naruto crossover but instead of anyone especially notable from svsss who crosses over it's my favorite "really not as bad as he could be" award winner, Ming Fan

Squinting back at naruto and flipping a coin to decide if he lands in warring states era or modern konoha and deciding I like both of these options, so we're going to do 2 separate stories/timelines. Or maybe we'll have him land in the past then get flashed forward to future Konoha when he tries going home so he gets the best of both worlds, who knows— I'll decide when I get there.

With that said, buckle in baby because it's time for:

✨️ Ming Fans very unfortunate fall into the mess that is naruto canon ✨️

Ming Fan gets flung into another dimension due the ultimate possible sin in svsss: being a background character.

Some obligatory crazy adventure was happening to Luo Binghe and SQQ involving some magic artifact, and in your stereotypical "someone not too important to the plot touches the object and gets exploded, proving it's dangerous to touch + upsetting SQQ so LB can appropriately comfort him" (probably originally a wife plot) scene, Ming Fan gets zapped into naruto canon. Woops!

If it helps him feel any better, SQQ really is upset by this. Binghe is not. At all. He might think it's karma but also this guy doesn't know the first fucking thing about appropriate levels of karma so maybe he should keep his mouth shut.

(Neither of these facts make him feel better but do you know what does? Imagining SQQ yelling at Binghe for this. He's so fucking sure it's that guy's fault somehow. It's always his fault somehow.)

So boom, he gets zapped into the worst possible (and my personal favorite moment for inconvenient time travel) moments; The final battle between the Uchiha and the Senju.

Specifically, he gets zapped directly onto Tobirama's sword. Queue shocked Pikachu faces from everyone— including Ming Fan but with added dramatic blood and cursing in chinese. Bc hey!! They don't speak the same fucking language actually!!

Unfortunate.

So Tbrm and Izuna both jump back away from this unknown as Ming Fan continues to bleed and curse and be very fucking confused as to where he was.

He took the hit in the shoulder of his non dominant arm, it's a pretty clean cut and he's a cultivator so he'll be fine with some rest but MAN if it don't hurt like a bitch. On top of the motion sickness of being launched through time and space too, and wrapped up in a little bow of "surrounded by hostile looking strangers all yelling in a language I don't understand"

Yeah he's not having the greatest time right now.

So like, Ming Fan just sort of appeared out of nowhere, right? Which has Tobirama extra fucked up bc, yk, hiraishin.

Izuna doesn't know that he was just saved from death death, so he's appropriately grateful at avoiding being stabbed but also like. Who the fuck are you. How did you get here. You just interrupted my battle with my rival and I take a little offense to that actually.

Everyone is yelling and confused and Ming Fan is seriously debating hopping on his sword and flying off because fuck this.

Madara and Hashirama finally enter stage left and are both like "well he's not one of ours" so now everyone is eyeing him even more suspiciously and a couple people are for sure lowkey tensing to attack

Enter convenient svsss mcguffin! Because "idk it sounds like something SQQ would know how to do," Ming Fan knows some language technique that allows him to speak/understand a language for a certain amount of time.

So he grabs his sword and circulates his qi to prepare the technique, and everyone tenses up because hey what are you doing over there buddy

Tobirama, a really good sensor, can actually sense the differences between Ming Fan's qi circulating through his dantian vs how shinobi would circulate chakra through their chakra coils. So he's holding a hand up like 'wait let him cook' @ the Senju who tensed up for a possible attack, if only because he wants to see where this goes and is confident that if he tried anything fr, well, he's kind of surrounded on all sides rn by two entirely different factions

The Uchiha meanwhile don't want to be the first to strike, so everyone's just kinda cautiously gripping their weapons in this very odd battlefield stall

And boom: now he can speak their language.

I'd say the first thing he does is grab Tobirama and shake him while cussing him out about watching where he's swinging that sword of is but he's smarter than that. (For sure it's what he wants to do tho. He is picturing it. Oh man is he picturing it.)

So like, actual communication for now

Now. PIDW is fucking filled with all sorts of mcguffins, "I touched something I shouldnt have and when I opened my eyes I was somewhere strange" is alarmingly common, and the sect absoloutley has some sort of "teleportation checklist" to run through whenever your random, unfortunate disciple gets fucking zapped.

(I like to hc that Shang Quinghua had some sort of hand in making an "official" checklist taught across the peaks, and that different peaks treat this checklist with uhh,, different amounts of respect. (LQG thinks its useless but has simultaneously run the tally for peak lord whose gotten stranded by artifacts he shouldn't have touched the most. These two facts may be directly correlated.))

Anyways; Ming Fan gets to doing that checklist. He's demanding to know where he is, when he doesn't recognize the name, how close he is to the sea, what year and time of the year it is, where the nearest sect is, etc.

At first this is directed at Izuna and Tobirama both, but when Izuna fails to answer as directly as Tobirama does (with quick, flat answers) and also tries to return the questions ("who are you, how did you get here, etc.") he directs his attention soley to Tobirama. Even though hes a little BITCH and stabbed him

(Ming Fan can recognize he teleported directly onto his blade but this will not change him being butt hurt ab it)

For everyone watching, this is weird as all hell! Who is this guy? Why these questions? Ew why is he deferring to the Senju, our Izuna-sama would be so much better to ask—

Now, quick side note, the thing about Ming Fan is he's just like a dude. He's just a guy. But also he's really not, but also he really is? If that makes sense?

He's the senior most disciple and (correct me if I'm wrong here bc its been a while) SQQ's head disciple, which means he'll be the next peak lord in however many years when SQQ and his generation chooses to ascend. So he's definatley not a slacker when it comes to power or wit. Even if he does rank pretty low in the overall SVSSS canon, but also like, yeah, background character vs actual heavenly demons n shit.

So he's definitely a pretty impressive guy!! But also he's just a guy. And he's in contact with the power houses and freaks that is SVSSS main cast (*cough* Luo Bingghe *cough*) So his sense of self and where be ranks power wise is probably skewed to a degree. (Though I imagine that when left to his own devices and not having to defer to his shizun, he definitely suffers from "haughty bitch disease" (tragically not fatal, for now at least)

Thus; cultivator version of just a dude. I love him!!

(arguably the only better option for the "svsss just a dude award" would be Gongyi Xiao, who I also love dearly but he's not here right now, so, winner by default Ming Fan!!! (Story of his fucking life tbh))

Anyways, back to plot:

So, thinking that Ming Fan immediatley recognizes Tobirama's hiraishin design bc it was actually enscribed on whatever artifect got him sent here. Wwoahhh mystery or something idk but theres that

(Was Airplane thinking about naruto when he created this specific object? Did he maybe google "sealing design ideas" then copy paste the hiraishin directly into his work, knowing no one but him would know what he had done since there was no artwork to go with it? Maybe. Perhaps. Just possibly.)

I honestly dont really know where itd go from that, but like Ming Fan probably sticks around specifically to harass Tobirama in the hopes he can send him home.

He points at the Hiraishin and goes "Your talisman brought me here. Take responsibility."

Tobirama understands this as his activation of the Hiraishin in battle literally summoned Ming Fan (only half true) and the poor mans presence here is thus entirely his fault. (Ehhhhh not really)

Ming Fan will not correct this assumption.

Either way though, Tobirama would not give up the chance / excuse to interact with and help return an interdimensional traveler. Can you say science experiment?? Because Tobirama sure fucking can!

Tobirama ends up having a fucking field day trying to find ways to replicate Ming Fan's different techniques with chakra instead of qi, and just in general studying how the energy in their bodies flows and works so differently yet so similarly

Anyways !

Through convoluted reasons peace happens somehow

Ming Fan calls Izuna a dumb bitch to his face maybe, idk that sounds like smthn hed do. But also like more politely bc they have different ways of speaking and SQQ probably gets on his ass about 'if you're going to insult someone do it in a way that reflects well on your own and the peaks teachings'

Actually I love that and now I need Ming Fan and Izuna cat fights

Actually I need Ming Fan and everyone cat fights, Izuna just gets the worse of it bc in my heart he is diva coded in a similar way to Ming Fan

Tobirama also bites back but hes too interested in the opportunity to study Ming Fan to risk being proper rude like he usually would to like, pretty much anyone else.

"Did this guy call me and my entire clan useless warmongers with the collective IQ of a tree stump? Yes. Do I want to cut him open to see if his organs match my own? Also yes. And my chances of getting to do this are very slightly raised by at minimum not pointing out that he has the attitude of if chihuahua got fucked by the worlds angriest hairless cat and spat out a human shaped baby."

Madara is NOT safe from the Ming Fan bitchfest but hes too busy happily drinking with Hashirama at the prospect of peace to give him his full attention, so he lets Izuna handle the cat fights

Hashirama meanwhile thinks hes kind of a tool but is also too busy happily drinking with Madara to really care, and is also the sort of guy to think that bitchy people are funny (as long as he isnt the one who has to deal with the consequences they bring) so honestly? Hes also having fun watching him and Izuna fight

Ummm stuff happens, peace is achieved, Konoha is developed and Ming Fan is in the thick of it bc he still needs Tobirama to send him home. He's kind of just,, there. Hanging out. Doesnt really have anything to do here, isnt particularly invested in this city building shit. As head disciple he has experience with things like management and the like, but nothing on this scale. He is however familiar with the concept of government-esq bodies overseeing superpowered people in societies equivalent to something close to a village. So that might come in handy, idk

But yeah, Ming Fan is just kind of hanging around, maybe he's brought in as a fresh pair of eyes / consultant

When it comes time to elect a Hokage, it's Madara vs Hashirama, with both of their younger brothers obviously backing their elder brothers.

Ming Fan, who has taken many, many missions across many different villages, countries, kingdoms and more, has seen this fucking story go down a million different ways. Better yet, he's seen this story go down a million different ways, often with SQQ hanging over his shoulder providing live commentary and a fucking insiders POV on the mechanics of this

The thing about Madara is that he is clearly respected by his clan, and feared by others. But he's not really,,, approachable.

Meanwhile Hashirama is the same, but he is approachable

And Izuna? Well, he has a real charm to him that his brother lacks. A charm that could realistically stand pretty well against Hashirama's own charm. He's popular, genuinley, among his own clan and surprisingly among some Senju as well. Whereas Madara was 'the force to be reckoned with' Izuna occupied a sort of middling space, always standing against Tobirama. Plus, hes easy on the eyes and can rock a pretty effective 'open and friendly smile.'

Not to mention he was the Uchiha's spy master, probably would go on to be Konoha's in the future, so he's a pro at managing people

Between Madara and Izuna, if you want an Uchiha to run for Hokage and win... wasn't Izuna clearly the better option?

Ming Fan brings this up to Izuna one day and he's actually kind of blindsided by this. The idea straight up never occurred to him, too used to being in the position to back his brother and raise him up to ever consider wanting the position Madara desired for himself.

He considers it for all of 3 seconds, a noticeable hesitation, before he laughs and shakes his head, saying that he would never steal his big brothers dreams like that. If he has the skills to win the Hokage position, he'd just use them to make sure Madara does instead

(Madara, overhearing their conversation from the hallway, retreats silently to think.)

A week later, and right before the intentions of Madara and Hashirama are announced to officially begin running for Hokage are announced, and a switch is made. A strangely quiet Madara switches out with Izuna at the last minute, a surprise to literally everyone but Ming Fan, who huffs approvingly

(This... has been his dream for so long. The village, his clan, safe and at peace. To be able to lead that would be... everything. But if his own baby brother would be more likely to be choosen for that over himself... At the very least, Madara wants to see an Uchiha with the hat.)

It's worth mentioning also that at this point, Ming Fan has a decent amount of influence on his own. Like, obviously, he's hanging out with the clan heads and heirs, he isnt contributing too much to the village, but he is contributing. He's pulling his weight, and he often spends time just kinda wandering around, talking to people, learning about this different world and the things it has to offer— different food, clothing styles, stories, the culture, just all of it

And that on its own is enough to endear him to plenty of people. Plus, as Konoha grows and more clans join in, he remains at its center sort of by default of having landed in that position from the start.

I think he's especially popular with more common people, bc he'll often be wandering around, just kinda exploring and all that, and if you complain to him theres a chance he might take that complaint all the way to the top, and your complaint (if its serious enough) might actually be dealt with. And as Konoha grows and more and more people clutter the information train, that's really fucking valuable!

All of that is to say that when Ming Fan makes a mostly careless comment in public about thinking Izuna would make a better Hokage, well, it's an endorsement from a well respected person. Who knows if it truly impacts the outcome, and god knows Ming Fan isn't like, actively campaigning for either of them—he probably doesn't care too much on who wins, finds them both agreeable enough as leaders (they both annoy him in different ways but at least with Izuna he's clearly grown begrudgingly fond of the back and forth they have)

So! It's an incredibly close race, but in the end Izuna wins, becoming the first Hokage

(His dramatic ass is absolutely on board with Hashirama's idea for a carved face in the mountainside, even as Tobirama, Madara and Ming Fan both physically cringe at the idea)

Ming Fan ends up being stuck there for a couple year, which is... annoying, but he's an immortal cultivator and has had much longer missions, so overall he's mild about his displeasure. Clear progress is being made by Tobirama, who is open about each new discovery he makes between Ming Fan and a normal mortal of this world

("To discover what made the hiraishin bring you here from another world entirely, we must first map out exactly what makes you and me so biologically different that the seal would react so strongly")

Anyways, Tobirama finally figures out how to fuck with the hiraishin enough to send Ming Fan back !! Yay, the day is saved and everyone is different levels of sorry to see him go, ranging from mildly fond to 'oh thank fucking gone, LEAVEEE ALREADYYYY' from the many, many people he's probably annoyed while here

Izuna and Ming Fan say goodbye and "Ill almost miss fighting with your bitch ass" in the weird language of insults they've developed, which to others just sounds like "dont go missing me too much, even tho youll never find someone else on my level to talk with again 💅"

Izuna gets one last jab in as Ming Fan is teleporting away but literally right as he's dissapearing Ming Fan gets one back in, making him officially holder of 'Got The Last Word' and this will piss off Izuna for the rest of all time

And so Ming Fan is safely returned hom— OH FUCK WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS WHERE IS HE NOW?? GODDAMIT TOBIRAMA

Yeah, so, Ming Fan is instead zapped some decades into the future, into Kakashi's genin days

I mean, congrats to Tobirama, he just invented time travel, so, thats cool

Ming Fan doesnt actually give a shit though because this is not what he was promised, Tobirama you useless hack—!

He was sent back from the battlefield where he appeared, something about eliminating the chances of the specific location being involved in the act of breaking through universes, and reappeared in that same place.

He pretty quickly makes his way over to Konoha via flying sword, easily dodging the many patrols in the area who are at pretty much full swing due to the fact that we're nearing the start of the second shinobi war.

(Sakumo has not yet been assigned that doomed mission of his but will be any day now)

Ok so. POV you're one of the guys guarding the gates of Konoha.

And out of seemingly nowhere this fucking GUY. Just. DESCENDS FROM THE SKY FROM THE BACK OF A SWORD. Immediately starts angrily yelling at you about demanding to know where Senju Tobirama, the fucking nidaime who died years ago, currently is. And that he needs to get his bitchy little quack doctor ass out here RIGHT FUCKING NOW and do what he GODDAMN PROMISED

As Im sure you can imagine, the gate guards. Do not react too well to this.

I think Ming Fan received a konoha headband, and he usually doesnt wear it unless he's like, going into battle and needs to be able to be identified by his allies. And he wasnt wearing it when he was ready to hop on home, so he takes it out now and kinda shoves it in their face like THERE LOOK IM ONE OF YOU NOW WHERE IS TOBIRAMA.

They might have tried to arrest him but he was rocking with that "do you know who I fucking am, let me speak to your manager RIGHT NOW. Who is your hokage is Izuna still in charge I will ask him to light your ass on fucking fire if you dont bring me to him 5 goddamn minutes ago" swag and, like, he was just so confident about it the gate guards didnt?? really know what to do?? HE SEEMS TO KNOW WHAT HES TALKING ABOUT GUYS AND THATS SCARY

WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOULL ASK THE SHODAI HOKAGE TO (WHAT, RISE FROM HIS GRAVE?) TO GIVE US A SHAKING

(He wouldnt lmao, Izuna would probably have given them a gift basket for inconveniencing Ming Fan tbh. This fact however will never and has never stopped Ming Fan from using his name as a blunt force weapon against those who dont know better.)

So.

Ming Fan is brought to the Hokage.

DRUM ROLL PLEASE AS WE NOW INTRODUCE KONOHA'S SANDAIME HOKAGE IN THIS TIMELINE MING FAN HAS NOW LIGHTLY FUCKED UP,,,

KAGAMI UCHIHA !!!

Yeah so with Izuna as the first Hokage, the hat then went to Tobirama, who then passed it down to Kagami, who is currently looking at Sakumo as his possible successor

So, a very peeved Ming Fan is escorted to the Hokage's office. On his way over, he's taking note of the buildings and the clear passage of time. He looks at the mountain and finds 2 new faces besides Izuna's own annoying one, and catches wind of exactly what happened pretty fast.

Hopefully Tobirama isn't dead yet though, because oh man does Ming Fan have some words for him

(Ming Fan is annoyed to find his favorite little shop from before has been replaced by some stupid fuckin ramen restaurant. Ugh.)

Ming Fan finally arrives, and Kagami, who actually interacted with him more than a few times back in the day, does a fucking comedy spit take and blurts out, "Fan-dono?????"

Ming Fan does not recognize him at first and when he finally does, it's him going oh you're that hanger on brat who was always begging Tobirama to teach you.

Not. The most flattering take. But Kagami will take it.

So Kagami is like, Hokage now. But also he has memories of Ming Fan as both Tobirama's friend and also Izuna's friend and also just like. "Respected guy my mom told me to be good around."

So theres all sorts of things happening in his head rn on how to react to this situation

Ming Fan meanwhile has never interacted with a Hokage he wasnt allowed to call stupid to their face (to be fair Izuna would immediatley call him stupid back) so he is not giving Kagami the respect expected of like. Literally any ordanary shinobi to give him.

But he lucks out and gets a pass on it bc Kagami still has him slotted into the "sensei and Izuna-sama's respected friend" part of his brain that makes him feel like a kid again

(behind him, the ANBU squad does not like or agree with this turn of events. at all. who the FUCK are you to talk to the Hokage like this what the FUCK)

I think Danzo fucking despises Ming Fan, just because its funny. Ming Fan called him a nosey little brat one too many times as a kid and Danzo developed a childish grudge that he totally forgot about later in life— till he runs into Ming Fan again, years later, looking annoyingly exactly the same, and reawakens the rage of a slighted 12 year old

Sarutobi I dunno, I think hes somewhere between Kagami and Danzo on "this guy hits the buttons in my brain that make me feel like Im a kid being scolded by my sensei again" and also "holy shit FUCK this guy"

Anyways! Heres the thing:

When he left, Ming Fan absoloutley took some of Tobirama's research with him. It was probably some sort of exchange thing— way back when Ming Fan agreed to be a little science experiment in the first place, he probably made a deal of "yeah ok fine but I want every crumb of research you pull from me and I wanna take it home when I go"

Tobirama kinda shrugged and went "yeah fair enough, but were gonna have to agree on what kind of person is allowed to see some of it"

Shook on it, the end

So Ming Fan has this big ass thing of notes up his sleeve— filled with stuff about the differences between a shinobi and a cultivators bodies, some different fun notes Tobirama took while adapting some of Ming Fan's techniques to be used by chakra and vice versa w Ming Fan trying to use Tobirama's techniques with qi, notes on editing the hiraishin to try and get him home, etc.

Theres also probably just some other random stuff— mostly medical and jutsu / sealing guides, which Ming Fan traded information to bring home thinking the sect would benefit from it. If nothing else, his shizun will get a kick out of it

(oh boy would SQQ get a fucking kick out of seeing goddamn naruto lore written out in detail and refffered to as texts from another dimension)

^ so all of that is to say that Ming Fan has the traces of the seal to try to bring him back home, but he cant fucking use it himself bc he doesnt know how to preform the hiraishin, which is a major component of it

(and also part of why Tobirama let him take it to begin with, unconcerned of Ming Fan or someone else ever using it to come back bc they've already established his different biology somehow makes him physically unable of using the hiraishin)

So he just needs to find Tobirama again, or minimum someone who can use the hiraishin, and he can at least just try again. Maybe the last time sending him forward was a fluke? It probably only needs some minor tweaks, right? So just— get him Tobirama, and they'll sort it out

Learning Tobirama is dead, Ming Fan is,,, well, he was already prepared to say goodbye when he left the first time. And looking at the statues, Tobirama clearly lived an accomplished life. Same with Izuna— Ming Fan kind of resolves to just not think about it.

When he asks about Madara, Ming Fan is informed that a year after he left, Madara apparently turned traior and attacked the village. This is. A lot. For him to swallow.

Ming Fan has a moment of blaming himself for not having seen the darkness festering inside Madara, but brushes the feeling away. There was nothing he could have done, and he has been down the road of blaming himself for not catching a tell that hinted towards secret evil intentions one too many times during his missions to do it again here.

(Still, a complicated feeling rises in him. He'd spent years, at that point, by the founders side. To hear Madara had gone and tried to kill them all— If nothing else, Ming Fan had truly thought Madara loved his brother.)

BUT DO YOU KNOW WHO IS SOMEHOW ALIVE? FUCKING HASHIRAMA AND MITO !!!

Hashirama, having never become Hokage, was never poisoned! Instead he retired, now too old to fight even if he wanted to, and lives in the Senju compound with his aging wife and big family (including his granddaughter, Tsunade)

In the last few years, it's seems like he's become sick, only a few people allowed to visit him, and almost only senju. Very sad, he's expected to die any day now

SO !

Ming Fan hops over to the Senju compound, and though literally everybody expected he wouldn't be allowed to see him, Hashirama permits him to enter his rooms

(The list of those who can see Hashirama is as follows:

His wife

His children and grandchildren

The Hokage

and on one very memorable occasion, the current Uchiha clan head, Uchiha Hikaku)

Ming Fan being added to that list,, well, he may not realize it's weight, but its safe to say that once the fact gets out, it's enough to pretty instantly cement him as trustworthy to most of Konoha. Especially those in higher circles

So, Ming Fan goes to Hashirama's side, and Mito greets him. She explains that the Mokuton is as much as a curse as it is a blessing, and opens the door for Ming Fan to see exactly what she means.

For the past few years, Hashirama has been stuck in the process of turning into a tree.

There... isn't much more to say about that.

They had prepared a room for him to spread his roots in, open aired and protected by enough seals to blind a man if they attempted to look in. With grassy floors covered in wildflowers, and a small stream that Mito says they decorated with rocks from the Naka river.

Hashirama sits at the center of it all, more tree than man, asleep most days but having miraculously awoken just in time for Ming Fan's arrival.

Hashirama jokes that it must be fate, and Ming Fan, sobered in this moment, nods and says that his Shizun has often said that everyone is bound by the strings of fate. Whether they obeyed the strings was up to them, but so long as they walked, the strings would continue to guide them to the places they needed to be.

Hashirama laughs, and tells him that he half expected to be cursed out once he'd heard that Ming Fan had been stranded here by his brothers seal.

"Is that really how you wish for this reunion to go?" Ming Fan asks, and Hashirama only laughs again.

"I'd rather hear you curse my name than sit and suffer through you playing polite because you're too offput by this old mans condition to say what you're thinking."

Ming Fan sighs, laying on the grass and staring up at Hashirama's leaves and halfheartedly curses at Tobirama's name, lamenting his situation as Hashirama listens with a smile.

"You don't seem as distressed as I'd expected!" Hashirama notes, and Ming Fan only shrugs. "I'll figure it out, I'm sure."

"How uncharacteristically optimistic of you!"

"I suppose that's just you rubbing off on me then."

Hashirama and Ming Fan talk for quite a while, and it reminds Ming Fan of older nights, when Konoha was still young, before even the Hokage was elected. Nights occasionally spent drinking together, sometimes alone, sometimes with others— Tobirama, Izuna, Madara, Touka, Hikaku, an array of clan heads and heirs, people who've come to make a home, find some peace, and in that moment only share a drink.

To Ming Fan, it had only been a couple of years since those early days.

To Hahirama, it had been decades.

Ming Fan is invited to stay at the Senju compound for as long as he needs to find a way home.

When he stands, he turns to Hashirama, and offers a bow. Lower than any he's offered before, in this world.

"Thank you for your generosity."

Hashirama smiles, and accepts the gratitude for all that it means.

That night, Senju Hashirama falls asleep, and never wakes again.

SOOO ANYWAYS !!

Ming Fan is now staying with the Senju!! In this verse the family is a bit bigger than canon, due to Hashirama's continued survival throughout the years and how that impacted general Konoha politics. This is also before Tsunade left the village, with her little brother Nawaki still alive and Orochimaru's student (though much like Sakumo, their tragic fates are destined to happen any day now)

Through Ming Fan interference, both of these characters eventually avoid these fates, dont ask me how tho but just know that it happens, so.

Ming Fan has 2 goals!

Find someone who can preform the hiraishin!

Find someone who can alter the seals Tobirama used last in an attempt to get him home!

Luckily for Ming Fan, Mito knows just how to help in both of these cases! She can cover number 2, as Konoha's leading (and oldest) seal expert, and her darling grand-niece, Kushina, just so happens to be dating the only guy in the world who knows how to use the hiraishin, isn't that convenient?

With Mito agreeing to help alter the seal and someone to actually use it set in place, Ming Fan has nothing left to really do other than just,, wait.

The good news is that, since he brought Tobirama's research with him and the alterations shouldn't take nearly as much time as last time, it should only be a few months!

This is where we get Ming Fan once again fucking around the village, and how inevitable interferes with Nawaki and Sakumo's deaths

Maybe he's bored and goes with Nawaki on his mission? He's definitely interacting with him, they both live in the senju compound after all!

Nawaki idolizes his grandfather Hashirama, and Ming Fan is apparently a good friend of his!! So hes totally harassing Ming Fan to know more about that!

I think the "time travel" bit is kept secret from the public, just bc like, messyyyy, and Ming Fan's own involvment in early Konoha is pretty unknown in general just bc he was overshadowed by more relevant historical figures— plus its not like he had a clan to continue to remember him.

So very few people even know he existed, let alone that he's that same guy from history

Ummm Ming Fan and Sakumo friendship, I like to hc skaumo as being friends with the sanin so maybe hes around the Senju compound sometimes, idk

A panicked Sakumo is called in for a super last minute mission and tushes over to beg Tsunade to babysit only to realize shes also out, then somehow ropes Ming Fan into watching over Kakashi

Ming Fan ends up lightly making fun of Kakashi's use of chakra (his own pov of how to use chakra being heavily skewed due to experiments with Tobirama) and ends up being roped further into helping to train Kakashi using techniques, tips and tricks told to him by Tobirama

Ming Fan does NOT want to teach Kakashi, Kakashi is very much harassing him into doing it and Ming Fan is less teaching and more 'throwing techniques at him in the hopes hell go away only to find that Kakashi has figured out how to do it correctly on his own and wow thats really alarming actually'

I think Ming Fan would like Kakashi and also be a terrible fucking influence on him bc he is absolutely encouraging him to be as mean and bratty as possible (with other people)

Ming Fan is the kind of guy to teach his students to be evil under the table so they can get away with it, like, "ok so I heard you tried to sabotage someone. And Im really disappointed actually bc you chose such an obvious way and if you're going to sabotage someone at least dont do it in a way that will tie back to you, like, really" kind of energy

Minato receives Kakashi as a student around this time and has to beg Ming Fan to stop bc the things hes teaching Kakashi keep clashing with shit he's trying to teach him and also "did you really tell Kakashi to try and beat up Obito behind the ramen shop to establish dominance because he almost did and I can not express how bad this is for team moral"

Minato is STRESSED but unfortunately this is not Ming Fan's problem. Sorry. Do better.

Without Izuna around to shoot the shit with Ming Fan actually finds himself incredibly bored. He got used to having someone he can be catty around, now hes like. All bored. And maybe a little lonely.

LONELY? WHO SAID THAT? HES NOT LONELY WHAT THE FUCK SHUT UP !! YOU DONT KNOW WHAT YOURE TALKING ABOUT !!!!

He goes to the stupid ramen place that replaced his old favorite shop and discovers he does not like ramen.

This does not improve his mood.

He's fucking bored is the thing, which is why he decides to take missions. And how he ends up with surprisingly high clearance (due to being technically a founder)

And how he ends up on the same team as Sakumo for a very specific mission.

And how, when the mission goes wrong, he sends Sakumo home saying that he'll rescue their mission partners bc at least he's not stupidly recognizable the way Sakumo is.

And how Sakumo never falls from grace

And how just a week later, Sakumo is announced as Kagami's pick for the 4th Hokage.

Sakumo is very grateful towards Ming Fan for the mission thing, considers him to be a good man. He is a little bit blind to the awful fucking influence Ming Fan is on Kakashi, much to Minato's despair.

ANYWHOOO

some months pass and the seal is now complete! Minato is brought in and let in on the secret, and agrees to help!

(getting rid of ming fan? holy shit sign him up!!)

Ming Fan says his goodbies, Nawaki and Kakashi are especially sad to see him go while the adults are all different flavors ranging from "understanding but fondly sad to YES GO GO GET OUT GET OUT LEAVE ALREADY GO PLEASE THANK YOU GOODBYE"

Mito is in general amused at all the shit Ming Fan has managed to start while here, she's a fan of watching him fuck around from afar, eating popcorn

So.

Third times the charm, right? Right???

As Ming Fan immediately realizes, no, no it is not the charm.

Ming Fan reappears on the fucking eve of Konoha's destruction by Pain's hand.

Now. As already stated: I love Ming Fan "just a guy but not really" so much! I think he is decently powerful on his own, just overshadowed by the general cast of SVSSS, and I also think that these past few years hes spent here in naruto, sparring with people like the founders, participating in experiments with Tobirama to see how far qi can be pushed in contrast with chakra, learning new techniques and adapting to the different levels of ambient chakra and qi in this world— well, he's not ready to split skies or anything like that but its safe to say that Ming fan was, and now is even more pretty fucking strong.

All of that is to say Ming Fan may be more attached to Konoha than he realized bc when he sees it being destroyed it isn't just the anger of a righteous cultivator seeing innocents be attacked that's lit inside him, nah Ming Fan is about to throw the fuck down

(It takes him not even a second to affix the konoha headband to his belt before he jumps into the fray)

So! Lets take a peek at the Hokage time line in Ming Fan's absence!

Kannabi bridge went unfortunately similar to canon, and Obito fell into Madara's hands.

With Sakumo still alive at the time, Kakashi was able to recover from this without the major personality shift, and due to a combination of Sakumo and Ming Fan's additional training, when it was Rin's turn on the chopping block, she instead survived and now continues to live as the Konoha's second jinchuriki

Obito attacked Konoha with the intention of releasing the kyuubi, and at the time Kushina and Minato were in the Senju compound for the birth

Mito got in his way, delaying him long enough for Sakumo to also arrive

In the fight, both Mito and Sakumo died (fucking thanks, Obito. I dont think Kakashi's gonna be able to forgive u for that one this time around) but Kushina and Minato survived, and Naruto was born healthy and without the fox sealed into him

Kakashi is understandable devastated, and as recovery efforts begin, he's taken in by Minato and Kushina. He offers little fight against this.

With Sakumo's death, Kagami was once again appointed as the Hokage. After only a year or two of stabilizing Konoha + preparing his successor, he quickly gives Minato the hat, and retreats once again to retirement.

Minato makes Kakashi and Rin both ANBU, expressing his desire to have them by his side (at least this time they're slightly older, with Kakashi at 15 and Rin at 17) and puts them on home guard, specifically as Naruto's ANBU guards. It's an easy job, and helps Kakashi in particular to heal some, even if he gets even more rigid about things like rules and formalities

With Izuna as the first Hokage and Kagami as the third (and technical 5th) Uchiha-village relations were actually very good! Thanks to this, the Uchiha massacre was avoided entirely

Kakashi is raised pretty much as Naruto's very protective older brother, with Rin in a similar boat but she still has her own family so there isnt quite so much trauma fueled dependency from her end.

Naruto grows up to be alarmingly talented, with Kakashi and Rin tutoring him, and Minato and Kushina obviously doing their best (though Minato remains mostly busy due to the unfortunate realities of being a Hokage. Meanwhile Naruto is absolutely a total mommas boy)

Kakashi and Rin end up actually fighting over who gets to be Naruto's sensei (Naruto wants NEITHER OF THEM!!!!! HES A BIG BOY NOW STOP CODDLING HIM!!!!!)

Canon then proceeds mostly the same, though with some very obvious major changes

Somewhere along the way, Itachi is convinced to ditch Konoha even without the massacre, and later down the like Sasuke also follows suit to investigate what happened with his brother— though this time he leaves with orders from Minato to go undercover, and investigate Sound

(fucking THANKS dad!! -Naruto, probably, when he finds this out)

COOL! SO! WITH THAT OUT OF THE WAY!

Ming Fan fucking bodies Pain right before he kills Kakashi. (Sorry Kakashi, no fireside chat with your father for you)

Now, Ming Fan had a pretty lasting effect on Kakashi's life overall, but he was only around for like, idk, half a year maybe. And Kakashi was young during the time, so his memories of the man remain very blurry and overall half forgotten.

So Kakashi doesn't recognize him immediately— Though from Ming Fan's side, he's immediately mistaking him for Sakumo, then realizing no, wait it isn't him, doing the mental math and making an educated guess that this has to be Kakashi then.

But that doesnt matter rn bc it is THROW DOWN OCLOCK !!!!!

The overall battle goes mostly according to canon but w less casualties since Ming Fan joins in, but then Naruto does his talk no jutsu or however that goes, Pain agrees to revive everyone, boom there done.

So tbh my knowledge of Naruto gets HELLA blurry from here on out, so we're gonna keep it vague, but, like, MING FAN IS HERE AGAIN YAYYYYY

Unfortunately p much everyone who could have instantly recognized him is fucking dead now. Kagami, Danzo and Hiruzen got picked off in previous battles or smthn, Mito and Sakumo are fucking dead, the kids who grew attached to him were too young and the time they knew him too short to really remember,

BUT.

Despite literally only being around for like, 6 months. Ming Fan succeeded at being so annoying that Minato never fucking forgot his face <3

(also there are probably some Uchiha around w sharingan memories of him)

So Minato sees this guy and goes through all the stages of grief at once. Meanwhile Ming Fan is seeing the hat and raising his eyebrows and going no way Sakumo chose THIS bitch boy for the job.

Meanwhile Naruto is standing direcly next to Minato going DAD WHOS THIS WHO IS THAT DAD HEY DAD HEY DAD WHO IS THAT DAD—

(Listen this is a hard day for everyone. Minato included. But this. This. He could just. Really use a fucking break. Thanks.)

But anyways Ming Fan is here and even if he got the option to go home, like, right now, he honestly probably wouldnt take it bc now hes kind of pissed. What do you MEAN Konoha is under attack? What do you MEAN some masked figure killed Sakumo years ago and now is back and also claiming to be Madara Uchiha and theyre trying to fucking kill everyone??

So yeah he's on board to fight, Konoha headband equipped to his belt, he's ready to stick around some more before he tries to go home again.

(and then someone gasps theatrically at Pain's eyes and goes "omg the rinnegan,, the mystical eyes said to be able to traverse time and space,,," and Ming Fan goes WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY THOSE EYES CAN DO")

But also Pain is dead now. So.

(Distant Sasuke, who is still following the beats of his canon story but just undercover under Minato's orders now noises)

So like Ming Fan sticks around, battles happen, we get Kakashi and an older Nawaki remembering him. Nawaki falls back a bit into his old view of thinking Ming Fan is just the coolest, but meanwhile Kakashi kind of takes on the role Izuna used to have, and now him and Ming Fan are having little cat fights in the bg

(With Sakumo having lived so much longer + having been able to comfort his son after Obito's death, the lack of Rin, Minato, and Kushina's death, and just in general all the little things stacking up in a different way than before, Kakashi avoided his major personality shift and is a lot closer to being the strict, bratty kid he used to be than the lazy, perpetually late slack off we know and love in canon)

anyways, blah blah blah, stuff happens, lots of battles, drama, oh my,

Finally we get to the Hokage's being revived for the final battle.

For whatever reason, Ming Fan was occupied somewhere else, possibly getting wrapped up in Sasuke's shit, when they were brought back.

So like.

POV he enters the battlefield, intending to face off with Madara. Then just.

Tobirama, distantly across the battlefield: ᵒʰ ˢʰᶦᵗ ⁿᵒ ʷᵃʸ

Ming Fan, who can hear him just fine bc cultivator: OH SHIT YES WAY YOU USELESS HACK

Ming Fan spends way too much time shouting at Tobirama when he should be FIGHTING GET BACK TO WORK MING FAN

I need a Ming Fan > Izuna > Kakashi bitch fest where they all just fucking snip at each other actually, I think it'd be funny

Ming Fan probably winds up yelling at Madara too, who did not expect to see him here

"Didn't the Senju send you home??"

"Didn't you die after making a fool of yourself in front of all of Konoha??"

Ming Fan doesnt use chakra so he's able to help back up Gai in his fight against Madara, and Gai is able to leave the battle not crippled for life, which is nice

Kaguya descends, things happen, the fight is won and the day is saved, and the fighting finally comes to an end

Sasuke somehow manage to end up with the rinnegan, and instead of trying to use the hiraishan for the third fucking time, Sasuke agrees to try and instead use it (and Ming Fan's qi) as a homing beacon to try and find his original dimension w the rinnegan! Much more reliable method

And so, for the final time, Ming Fan says his goodbyes.

It's,,, an event.

The old hokage's, including Sakumo, are still around with the power of edo tensei, and he's able to give his goodbyes to them all once again, one by one.

Tobirama gives only a brief apology for the seal not working as it should before dissolving into mumbled theories of what might have gone wrong— then remembers himself and shakes his head, offering a curt goodbye

Izuna scoffs and says that at this rate, he expects to see Ming Fan again in a couple decades when the next chakra goddess tries to explode the world and the living are forced to once again turn to him for help💅

Ming Fan tells him to shut the fuck up, and if it happens then he'll just look forward to getting another opportunity to call him a fool to his face, instead of to a grave.

Izuna laughs, and waves him away

Kagami doesn't have too much to say, but thanks Ming Fan for his help. "You may be from another world, but you are just as much of a konoha man as any of us."

Ming Fan... chooses not to take this as an insult. Instead, he nods his head, and gives Kagami the full respect a Hokage would ordinarily deserve, for quite possibly the first time.

Sakumo, he finds holding his son as Kakashi clings to his shoulder. Ming Fan watches for a moment, and Sakumo catches his eye. He gives him a big, genuine smile, mouths thank you, and bows his head.

They already said their goodbyes once, and Ming Fan doesn't wish to take any of the time he has left away from his son. He nods back, and continues.

Minato, when he finds him, is hiding out on the battlefield, laying down with an arm covering his eyes. He groans, when he sees Ming Fan, but sits up.

"Don't despair, you'll finally be getting rid of me." Ming Fan sighs, and Minato snorts.

Minato is... Well, he's a lot more fond of Ming Fan than he once was. Even if the man is still a giant pain in the ass. They speak for a bit, Ming Fan advises him to go ahead and retire already, god knows its what his son would want, and Minato stares up at the sky.

"At this point? I really should have ages ago."

Minato shakes himself, and finally stands, offering a hand to Ming Fan.

Ming Fan clasps his risks, and they nod to each other, probably more civil than they ever have been before.

"Fighting with you has been.... a wonder." Minato seemed to settle on, and Ming Fan arched a brow.

"Not an honor?"

"I think we both know the answer to that."

Ming Fan rolled his eyes, but still smirked.

"Likewise. Take care of your family."

"May you finally return to yours."

And with that, they part ways.

He's walking back to Sasuke, when those who had been edo tenseid fade away. He's just in time to see Kakashi, back turned, as he watches his father go for one final time.

When he turns, he catches his eye. Eyes, plural, as it seems Obito had left him with quite the gift.

Kakashi nods to him, seeming still overwhelmed with his fathers departure, and not quite sure what else to say to Ming Fan.

It's a stark cry from their first goodbye, Kakashi so far from the young boy who once clung to Ming Fan's leg, huffing about him not being allowed to leave till he taught him just a little bit more.

It's Ming Fan, who takes the steps towards the man.

"I'm glad my lessons were ever of any use to you. You've certainly made better use of them than I ever could have imagined." He says, and when Kakashi goes just a touch red under his mask, Ming Fan thinks he might understand what Shizun was talking about, when he laments about the cuteness of his students even once grown.

"WHAT? Are you seriously gonna go, just like that?"

It's Naruto, who's apparently caught wind of Ming Fan planning to leave sooner rather than later.

"No way am I letting you leave with the bastard before he's given me an explanation!" Naruto grabs Sasuke, who with the pained face of someone who knows they're about to get what they deserve, just sort of lets it happen.

"You gotta stay for at least the celebration! We finally won, it's time to party!"

(Ming Fan laughs, and he decides that just for a bit longer— Just a night more, he will stay)

.

.

.

It has been one year to the day, since Shen Qingqiu's head disciple disappeared.

The exact allowance of a disciple to vanish, before you must consider declaring them dead.

Shen Qingqiu...

Doesn't like to talk about it. Binghe seems to realize he can only comfort him so much for this fact, and today has taken to giving him a bit of space, which he appreciates.

It's for this reason, when a swirl appears in his bamboo hut, depositing two men, that Shen Quingqiu is alone.

"Shizun, this disciple is reporting his absence for these last 6 years. I apologize for my lateness." Ming Fan cries, falling to his knees and bowing his head.

Shen Quingqiu is on his feet in an instant, reaching towards his disciple, already having to suppress the cry rising up in his throat as he falls to his own knees, taking Ming Fan's hands in his own.

"Ming Fan will not apologize for thing out of his own control, this one is overjoyed to see you home."

The man behind his disciple shifts, and Ming Fan gestures towards him.

"This Uchiha Sasuke has assisted in bringing me—"

Wait WHAT.

Fuckin. Lugh track. Roll credits. Idk. Boom. Done. Theres ur au. Fuck how did this end up being so long

[rwbyrg]

Hello!

I would like to ask if there's already a post a long the lines of "Why Rosegarden is a good ship" or reasons to ship RG? If none would it be alright to ask for your insights?

It's my first time being interested in them but I just can't wrap it around my head for now. I would love to read about them!

Thank you in advance ^^

Hi Anon!

I have not yet made any posts specifically with these questions in mind, no. Just a small, unfinished, series about why I believe the ship is likely to be canon. I am happy to offer some insight, but I don't know that I'm going to give you the answers you're looking for. 😅

First and foremost, the questions you're asking aren't really ones that can be answered objectively. What makes a ship "good" or "bad" is largely subjective, as there are as many ways to view a ship as there are people viewing it. I could make an argument about how I think it is - objectively speaking - a well written pairing that follows the typical beats and tropes (with delightful subversions) of a good romance arc, that also parallels how other canon ships within RWBY have been established... but at the end of the day, if you're not a fan of what RG is about, then there's not much I can say to change your mind.

Which brings me to your second question. The best reasons to ship RG are going to be the same reasons for why anyone should ship anything: ship it if you want to, ship it if it resonates with you, and ship it if you enjoy it.

If their characters, interactions, themes, parallels, allusions, tropes, symbolisms, foils, designs, messages, etc., aren't your cup of tea, it's completely okay if you pick something else on the menu! So long as you don't like. verbally harass people that do like it or fill the tag w the same discourse that we are all very tired of seeing.

I don't know if that is a sufficient answer to your question, so I'll take a chance and also provide some of my personal reasons as to why I think it's "good" and why I ship it. While there are many reasons I can't all include, the main things are just how much they mirror each other:

From their complementary character designs (red vs. green, silver vs. gold, moon vs. sun, etc.),

To shared fairytale allusions (Little Prince and the Rose, Dorothy and Princess Ozma/Tip, Warrior in the Woods, etc.),

To the narrative parallels (both being the youngest of the group when they joined respectively; how both of their attachments to each other keep being put into focus; to their shared themes around choice and identity: Ruby having chosen adventure but feeling as if she has no choice but to keep moving forward, while Oscar was chosen by adventure but chooses to do what he can despite his circumstances; Oscar not knowing who he is because of the merge and asking: "I'm just going to be another one of his lives, aren't I?", versus Ruby not wanting to be who she is after chasing the the ghost of an unachievable ideal, but being asked "what if you could be anyone?"; how they're both just kids thrown into war and unfair responsibility before they even have a chance to figure out the kinds of people they want to be, etc.),

to perhaps, most importantly, the show of mutual support between the two of them.

Ruby supports everyone as best she can. She is always giving to and supporting others as a show companionship and leadership. But thanks to V9 and also E4 of RWBY Beyond, we know this was not sustainable or sufficiently reciprocated.

She was let down by Weiss who constantly managed to hit her right in her insecurities; let down by Blake who - even while trying to uplift her - just ended up adding more pressure by treating Ruby like a role model; to Yang and Qrow who both tried to support her as best they could, but kept comparing her to Summer in the process; to Penny having so much of her own lack of experience, stressors, and very immediate worries going on that she couldn't offer Ruby the support she needed even if she wanted to; to Jaune flipping his lid at her and pointing the blame even when he himself was guilty and knew he was out of line; to Ozpin, Qrow, Maria, Tai, Summer, Cordovin, Ironwood, etc., all being adults who could have taken responsibility or done the right thing, but fumbled or failed leaving her to pick up the pieces in their wake. But Oscar? We see it from Oscar's introduction that he - like their shared fairytale allusions - is in awe from the moment he meets her. But after one conversation about the weight of her grief, trauma, and the responsibilities she is carrying - a conversation she has not had with anyone else up to this point - he immediately sees how heavy Ruby's burdens are. Saying, as early as V5: "This must be really hard on her too". And while it is subtle, he never stops looking after her as best he can as the volumes go onward ("Looks like you're needed elsewhere."/"You're sure?"/"Yeah, I've got it."). However, it's only in V9 that her sister Yang is asking "why didn't she just talk to us?". It is only in V9 when her partner Weiss admits: "Maybe it's because she didn't feel like she could". It is only V9 when Ruby finally lays her burdens out to someone else again, this time to the Blacksmith, after almost having given up completely.

For a character who's 116 episode long arc has been about carrying the weight of responsibility far beyond her limits, never asking for anything in return no matter how difficult it gets... to meet another character that instantly notices her struggles and makes a conscious effort to help where all others have failed? To have one conversation and say "that looks heavy, let me help you carry that" without her asking or waiting for an answer? It's just one of the most beautiful acts of care I can think of. The themes and the parallels all resonate very strongly with me on a personal level, making it - in my humble opinion - a brilliant, and very stable foundation for a relationship, and for a story.

Thank you for your question, I hope I was able to offer some of the insight you were looking for. 💕

[sapphiresaphics]

Arcane at its heart is about the duality of opposites. It’s about the rich. It’s about the poor. It’s about the order of science. It’s about the chaos of magic. It’s about the bonds of biological family. It’s about found family. It’s about good. It’s about evil. It’s about privilege. It’s about oppression.

Throughout the show we are CONSTANTLY shown polar opposites and how quickly you can flip between them. You can try to do the greatest act of good in your life, and it might end up being one of the worst things that ever happens to you. You can try to do terrible things, but at the heart of it you have good intentions.

Two sides of the same coin. Sister vs sister. Brother vs brother. Rich vs poor. Science vs magic. Violent revolution vs peaceful revolution. Etc.

We are shown these things being wildly disproportionate to one another too. Because at the end of the day you need a balance. If there’s an imbalance for far too long, terrible acts and things will happen when the pendulum swings the other way. Too much force exposes you to risk.

I want people to keep this in mind when watching the finale. I have a feeling this is what the whole show has been leading up to. I think in the end we are going to have to find a balance between the opposing forces. Because that’s the ONLY way things are going to get better for everyone.

[meekmedea]

some things in the time-travelling Clemmie + Coryo unhinged AU because I realize there isn't much explanation, if any haha

Set post TBOSAS, maybe anywhere from their late University years to post University graduation.

Clemensia was never bitten this time, she and Reaper were considered victors for the 10th game - they have this odd, begrudging sort of alliance to friendship.

Coriolanus ends up an intern in the Ravinstill administration, courtesy of Gaul. He seeks out Gaul and impresses her far earlier than the 10th game.

Promising intern vs Pseudo- grandniece/granddaughter

Coryo is sort of Gaul's 'pawn' to keep Clemmie's influence on Max in check. In a way, you could argue it's Volumnia vs Hector, even if Hector is only haunting the narrative.

Because Clemmie gets a bit of leeway with the president, she doesn't have as much as Hector would have had, but enough that the adult Ravinstills are like 👀 👀. She gets away with as much as Felix (the clear favourite of his generation) does.

Max's policies flip between harsh and lenient depending on what is being addressed. Clemmie wants to improve health policies in the Capitol? Okay. Coryo has a plan to wipe 13 off the map for good? He's listening.

The adult Ravinstills worry about Clemmie's influence. Like Coryo is worrisome too, but interns can be fired. Clemmie, not quite the same. Curse the Dovecotes and their charm *shakes fist*

Someone plants the idea that given her influence, maybe Max plans to have her married off to Felix. And will use this excuse to name Felix as heir, which would bypass his uncles/aunts/parents/older cousins. It's illogical, but not impossible.

Given Felix's uninterest in family politics + politics in general, it would really mean Clemmie would be running things, and they will NOT stand for a Dovecote ruling over them. Also, what if Clemmie takes after her grandmother, Cleopatra, and her spouse mysteriously dies? Even more dangerous if it's after they have a kid, because then that kid will be next to be head of House Ravinstill while Clemmie runs things till the kid's majority.

Volumnia (maybe?) or someone suggests to limit that possibility, marry her off. What about Coriolanus? It's a favourable one, given their family names + their standings. Also, that way, even if Clemmie takes after her grandmother, then they'd just be getting rid of Coryo, who's another potential threat.

Coriolanus is probably all for the idea (possibly behind suggesting the idea as well? he does like her in this au.)

What does Max think of all this?

Given Clemmie's adamant confession about disliking Coryo, Max is suspicious of any attempt to have her married off to the blond.

He's like: we need to stop humouring the Snows' delusions.

Dovecotes famously marry for love, so Max is hesitant to arrange her marriage. And he's not really her grandfather/granduncle either, so he has no say in things.

Dovecote side of things:

Given Max's favouritism, Endymion & Aelia know that the President will have a say on 'approving' Clemmie's partner, regardless of lack of blood relation.

Max is adamant that he will see Hector's granddaughter happy + taken care of.

Pretend Ashcote? (With Reaper's permission ofc) She's running out of options and she's grown close enough to Reaper that she's terrified of Coryo turning his eye to him and killing him off. Coryo has probably insinuated the possibility before.

It throws a wrench into Max's plans when he asks her about her plans for the future.

Clemmie: I'm in love with Reaper Ash. Max, with some dread: His name sounds familiar... Clemmie: He was the victor of the 10th games. Max: *spiralling* (why does it always leads back to D11?)

Some fun questions to consider:

Does Clemmie have to commit to the bit and marry Reaper, on the wild off-chance that Max is like: ...sure, if he makes you happy.

Does Coryo commit to his affections (idk what to call it, his obsession?) and decide to take action so he can have her? ie. kill Reaper? kill Max? threaten her into compliance?

Should Clemmie kill Coryo?

Or does he kill her in some highly-twisted idea of if he can't have her, then nobody can?

[doyouknowthischaracter]

RANDOM ASKS GRAB BAG

Putting a bunch of answered asks in one post so I don't spam your dashes too much. Under the cut because it's a very long post. If your ask isn't here, don't worry! The ask box is far from empty, and I'm sorta trying to group them by topic. Enjoy?

Anonymous asked: you mentioned in another ask that there were a few things you were probably going to check out from doing these polls and I was just curious which ones those are, if you don't mind sharing fjdjsj

I don't mind sharing! I had to go through the archive to remember which ones I wanted to check out, but a few of them would be The Walten Files, Red vs. Blue, The Murderbot Diaries, I Am In Eskew, and The Mistholme Museum of Mystery, Morbidity, and Mortality. Many of the characters posted here look interesting, but I'm such a slow watcher/player/reader/etc. that it'd take me decades to go through everything lol

Anonymous asked: Have you considered doing like uhhh idk how to explain properly, but statistics/data from loads of polls in a summary every so often? I've seen some poll blogs do a most known/least known type bar graph every so often. And I would be super interested in seeing this sort of thing for this blog!! It's fair enough if not though, obviously this would create a lot of extra work for you. Anyway, thanks for running this blog :-) Anonymous asked: I just asked a question about seeing the data statistics/ bar graphs - please ignore it! Just reread your pinned and realised I'd missed that bit :'). BUT, last point remains, thank you for running this blog and putting up with repetitive anons I bet aksjskdjsk

I haven't put the data in a graph yet, but if I figure out how to organize that in a way that's both comprehensible and actually tells us something new, I'll give it a try for sure. Until then, we do have the spreadsheet. And no worries, I'm glad you're enjoying the blog! :)

Anonymous asked: *sees a poll blog* "I must answer each and every poll I can"

Godspeed on your journey and remember to stay hydrated! 🫡

Anonymous asked: this is my favorite blog! Every morning I wake up and check the polls like they're the paper, just to say "I don't know them" Truely a humbling experience!

Happy to be your neighborhood paperboy!

@iceice-baeby asked: Are olyou fearing the day someone submits Solid Snake from MGS and you will choose the wrong picture Because everyone always seems to choose the wrong picture

The only difficulty will be in not using this one:

Anonymous asked: Just scrolled back through your blog up to posts from Dec 3rd and I know why those polls are closed now but I cannot describe the genuine anguish I felt seeing Mr Orange and going NO I KNOW HIM - I KNOW HIM!!!! Anyway I found this blog like ten minutes ago and I love it

Don't worry, he's A-OK! 👍

(Also, thanks! I appreciate your dedication.)

Anonymous asked: scrolling through to catch up on the characters and knowing a whole three of them was so bizarre. im not supposed to press the yes i know them button, im supposed to do my sworn duty and vote no with unending confusion. the world has been flipped on its head 😵‍💫

I bet the next 30 were characters you've never heard of, just for balance to be restored.

Anonymous asked: Whenever i misclick I feel sooooo bad like im sorry my dear friend for not recognizing you I apologize for my rudeness

No polls so far ended with only one vote difference between answers, so you don't have to feel too bad. For now. 👀

Anonymous asked: this is fun cause i’ve definitely submitted some characters but i’ve immediately forgotten who. so i’ll also be pleasantly surprised to see my beloveds on the blog.

A gift from you to you, courtesy of unreliable memory! Sweet!

Anonymous asked: Devastating. I keep missing the voting for the only characters I know.

You'll do it one day, I believe in you!!

@iceice-baeby asked: Would you consider writing in the tags if YOU know a character or not You have done it sometimes before, but I'd be curious if you do recognise some of those random niche as all hell blorbos Also I can't wait for my Blorbos turn. Because either He-and-she is gonna take most obscure place, OR I will actually find maybe more than two people, myself included, who know him-and-her and who I can ramble at for hours until they block me

Oh yeah, for sure. I didn't think anyone would be interested to know, but I can do that when I remember to!

Did your blorbo show up already?

Anonymous asked: I have been having the opposite problem of everyone else, apparently. I'll see a name and be like, "I don't know who that is". But then I see the picture and realize… Yes I do!

That's why I take the time to include fitting pictures, helps jog the memory!

Anonymous asked: I feel very superior every time I know a character most people don't

Hey, nobody likes a show-off. (<- Joking)

Anonymous asked: Wait, has Beetlejuice not been submitted?? I could've sworn I submitted the musical version! Anonymous asked: Oh wait no I didn't submit musical Beetlejuice to you, got you mixed up with @/every-character-ever-poll lol my bad

Indeed he hasn't been submitted yet, maybe next time!

@thetisming asked: sorry for saying something negative in the replies to a post someone was being a dick about jukebox musicals

No worries, but don't let it get to you. People are allowed to dislike your favorite things even without any good reason. It's a matter of taste, which is highly subjective. It's more constructive to focus your attention on people who do enjoy the same things as you!

@autism-criminal asked: What is your favorite color of the rainbow (red orange yellow green blue indigo purple) ?

Orange! 🍊 What's yours? :)

Anonymous asked: "data is not accurate" bro if ur going to a tumblr poll blog for accurate data you NEED to reassess some things asdfghjkl; anyway this blog is great thank you for running it it's a lot of fun and has resulted in some very funny interactions between me and my fiance. notably "what the fuck do you MEAN 6% of the sans undertale website doesn't know who sans undertale is" and "i'm sorry i simply don't believe that ANYONE doesn't know who DRACULA is"

Different people come here with different expectations, I suppose. Which is fine, I don't mind, but they're bound to be disappointed if they expect 100% accuracy all the time. But anyway! I'm happy to hear I can provide a new form of enrichment for you and your fiancé!

@sweetpollyolliver asked: So many manga and anime characters and I know like 1% of them 😭

I'm ngl, I'm not a big manga/anime connoisseur either, so I'm just as lost as you most of the time lol 🤝 (<- shaking hands in solidarity)

@cringelordofchaos asked: If I go insane one day I am going to try to make an English translation for Mesec Boje Purpura so everyone can know who veštica Noks is

I'm fully behind you! Keep us updated if you do.

Anonymous asked: I scroll through your blog. I don’t recognise any of these characters. ‘No,’ I click, ‘no,’ ‘no,’ ‘no.’ I am content in the darkness of the rock I live under. But, alas, all things must end. I continue my scroll, the glee of the irrelevant rampant in my veins. But what’s this? It can’t be… My shelter is cruelly ripped away and the brutal light of knowledge seeks me out like a bloodhound, it gives me no place to hide. ‘Yes,’ I sob, defeated, ‘Yes, I do know the jjba character.’

A modern-day Greek tragedy, truly 💔

Anonymous asked: was really surprised to vote and see that a character was 100% know them. then I noticed I got there early enough to be the only vote

For one shining, brilliant moment they were 100% known and surely that counts for something.

Anonymous asked: You should make up a character and make a poll for them and see how many people lie or misclick

Well....... I'm not going to comment on that. 🐰

Anonymous asked: I follow this blog and another blog that does smash or pass and occassionally I will come to one of your posts and examine the images to decide and then remember this blog's gimmick before trying to hit smash

Imagine voting smash there and then coming here to vote "I don't know them at all" on the same character. Brutal.

@ink7blot asked: *sees big naturals* I hate that. *reblogs*

A job well done, then 😌

[bird-inacage]

After your last gifset (the sun vs moon one) and in light of the two preview clips we get from next week - Sand shutting Ray's request to be friends down and Ray having his little jealous fit at the party - I keep thinking about the fight at Sand's apartment from the trailer. And what I think I'd like (but am sadly not convinced will happen, because why would they cause us the least pain?) is for that fight to happen after the party jealousy episode, and be because Ray's finally confronting some level of his feelings for Sand. What I'm imagining in my best-case scenario is: Ray has his jealous fit and goes to talk to Sand afterwards, with the intention of keeping Sand on the hook/reinstating the flirtation even though it isn't going to go anywhere. (I don't think he'd encourage outright cheating because that instantly = no more Mew.) Sand turns that down flat because "Do you think I have no dignity?" as per the OST clip. And Ray has another jealous/entitled meltdown and says he doesn't even want to be with Sand anyway, he wishes he'd never met him, and he bets those grapes were sour anyway etc etc. Anyway, I don't think it will happen, but I like the idea on the grounds of a) Sand having a backbone! Yes please! and b) continuing to set up Ray's inevitable full-bore bitch fit if/when the ex shows back up. I thought you might enjoy that scenario too!

Haha, Hello Anon! 👋

Firstly, I do hope Sand stands his ground. He's given Ray A LOT of chances. If he starts wavering, I'll flip a goddamn table. Sand needs to stick up for himself, but also narratively Ray has to feel the threat of Sand distancing to ever recognise his own feelings.

What I anticipate is things with Mew start to get a little rocky. Whilst Top is doing his level best to win Mew back, that's potentially when Sand's ex enters the scene. Timing wise, Sand is going to be much more susceptible to an old flame trying to rekindle whilst he's bouncing back from Ray. He's not in too deep yet to be opposed to the idea of moving onto someone else. So this is where the ex could do the most damage. Sand is a man of principle so if the ex showed up whilst he and Ray were already together, I don't think he'd be as easily swayed. Which is why I'd be inclined to expect the ex to show up before Ray and Sand have identified each other as lovers.

Now if that does happen, Ray is going to have an existential crisis. He finally has Mew, and yet he's not happy. He's seething. He's bothered. Perhaps Mew notices how worked up Ray seems to be over this.

What leads to the fight scene in Sand's apartment has to be pretty considerable. This fight looks 10x more brutal than the one outside the bar. And due to the sheer devastation in Sand's reactions throughout, I'm not sure this will take place next episode. I think whatever tension is brewing between them will need to escalate much, much more if it's to go from somewhat numb to utter anguish.

"You think my life will be better with you? It's only f*cking going down to hell." The dialogue could be read either as 'oh you think I'd be better off with you as my boyfriend instead of someone else (e.g. Mew)?' or 'you really think you would make my life better?' (in a more general sense).

But yes, I'm all for Ray going on a steady trajectory of losing his mind over Sand giving him the cold shoulder. Added in with the likelihood of things just not working out at all with Mew, and potentially Sand's ex rocking up. *Rubs hands together* I just need to see Ray jealous. That's all I really want. That boy was behaving way too cocky in the Episode 8 preview and he needs to be brought back down to earth. Swiftly.

Thanks for the ask! 😉

---birdie

[formula1fanfiction]

Lewis Hamiliton / Max Verstappen

Title: Alpha Vs Alpha

Pairing: Lewis Hamiliton / Max Verstappen

Characters: Lewis Hamiliton, Max Verstappen, George Russell

Prompt: Requested

Prompt: Mawis in A/B/O both Alphas and with Lewis bitching max.

"Why do you always come here when you're in a rut?" Max snaps, seeing Lewis standing at his hotel room door, however he steps to one side and lets the Alpha in. The thing is, Max is also an Alpha, hate sex just happened after Max won the championship back in 2021 and ever since Lewis in a rut keeps coming to his door every couple of months.

"Why don't you find a pretty little omega to fuck instead." Max laughs at his own jokes. "Isn't George an omega? Why don't you go and ruin him instead?" Max grunts as he's suddenly pushed into the wall. "I don't want to hurt George, but I don't care if I hurt you." A sudden wave of pleasure runs down Max's body. He hates that he wants this, why does the thought of Lewis fucking him turn him on so badly?

The smell of Lewis' in rut is stinging his nose, if he was some little bitch omega he'd be spreading his legs and begging Lewis to fuck him, but he's not George for god sake so why is begging for a knot almost on the tip of his tongue?

Lewis going into kiss him takes him completely by surprise, it's wet and dirty. Not soft gentle like you'd kiss an omega, this was full of tongues and teeth. Both alpha's fighting a battle of control, Max was unfortunately the one losing considering Lewis is in a rut.   

It stops all too soon and Lewis takes a step, releasing max from the position on the wall, before Max has registered what's going on Lewis is rugby tackling him onto the bed. He thinks of fighting back but there doesn't seem much point Lewis clearly feral with his rut and Max would only lose anyway.

"Not much fight into you tonight, are you turning into some bitch omega?" Max rolls his eyes as he slips out of his boxers, throwing them at Lewis' head. "If you want some bitch omega, go and find George."

"I don't want George, I want you." Lewis pins Max to the bed. Max roughly tosses and turns, trying to fight Lewis' hands off. "This is what I want, someone who fights back." Max narrows his eyes. "You're a creepy loser Lew-" Max 's thoughts are cut off by Lewis wrapping his hand around Max's cock and starting stroke.

"You don't have to do this Max, I can leave?" Lewis' eyes meet Max's. "I didn't say I didn't want it." Max speaks with as much confidence as he can muster but it's a bit hard when there's hand wrapped around your cock.

Max's mind takes too long to catch up, his cock is suddenly abandoned and there's a lubed finger in between his ass cheeks. Instinctively he bucks up his hips to meet it but suddenly stops because that's not a very alpha thing to do.  

What Max should be doing is overpowering Lewis and fighting him for dominance but instead he's just laying their taking everything the other Alpha is giving him. Lewis starts to move his finger, slowly thrusting it in and out of him, making it wet with lube like some omega's slutty hole.

Without warning Max is suddenly flipped around onto his front, giving Lewis easier access to his hole and soon a second finger is joining the first one. It shouldn't feel as good as it does, Alpha asses were not meant to be played with.  

Max lets himself enjoy it anyway, Lewis works his way up to three fingers and is making magic with them, rubbing against Max's prostate and making him see stars. He keeps toying with Max until he's got four fingers easily slamming in and out of him. "I think you're ready Max."

"I'm going to fuck you now." Lewis has his hands on Max's hips and starts sinking inside of him. Max can't hold back the noses of pleasured pain, Lewis is huge and his body is not built for this but the more Lewis eases inside, the better it starts too feel and soon Max can feel the pleasure over the pain.

This is not what an alpha should be doing, letting another alpha sink his monster of cock inside his asshole and use him as a bitch. Yet that's what is happening and Max is enjoying it. Lewis keeps nuzzling into Max's legs, nosing his scent and biting along the back of it.

"You feel so good Max, like you were meant to be an omega." Max growls at that but only briefly because Lewis has started to move. He doesn't start of gentle he pulls nearly all the way out, only to slam back inside again and soon settling into hard and fast pace.  

Max keeps having to fight the urge to bare his neck to Lewis, who keeps stopping to nose against his scent gland but soon stops and ruthlessly starting fucking him again. Skin against skin is the only sound in the room. Lewis squeezes Max's hips and sinks in deeper finding Max's prostate and hitting it over and over again. If Alpha's weren't supposed to get fucked then why does this feel so fucking good?

It doesn't take much longer for Max's knot to start swelling, he's experiencing so much sexual pleasure just from being fucked, it's almost embarrassing. Lewis laughs seeing Max's knot start form and wraps his hand around Max's cock stroking it to the same pace as his thrusts. Max is screaming now, from pure pleasure.  

it doesn't take long for Max to start coming, spurting load after load all over himself. Lewis' massive cock still inside of him has started to feel a little overwhelming. Luckily Lewis isn't too far behind and he's spilling inside of Max with a shout.

Lewis' knot has obviously formed as well and it's almost at the point of being painful, his body is just not built for this. Max wants to scream, Lewis' painful fucking knot is just evidence of how he submitted to a fucking alpha. He should be embarrassed, he isn't though.

"Look at this year's world champion full of come and an alpha's not." Lewis is laughing pulling his cock out of Max's abused hole now his knot has popped.

They lay  together on the bed, not touching just regain their breath. "Don't tell anyone I fucked another Alpha, will you Max?" Max rolls his eyes in anger. "Who the fuck would I tell? Imagine if people found out a world champion had some losers dick up his arse, I would never live it down." Lewis would have laughed if wasn't for the loser comment.

He fucking hates Max Verstappen, maybe not perhaps he loves him. Max doesn't need to know that though.   

[elliepassmore]

Starling House review

5/5 stars Recommended if you like: dark academia, sentient houses, curses, found family, street smart vs. fantasy smart

I was very excited when I saw people starting to post pics of this book that included footnotes and fun 'non-narrative' bits. I really liked Ship of Theseus and while this book is very different from that one, I think the footnotes and wikipedia article elements are kind of similar, which I liked. Another thing I liked is that, despite having footnotes adding onto the story, the story itself is very easy to comprehend and isn't dense or bogged down in details. I definitely sped through this one!

Opal is a fun character to read from because she's definitely been hit hard by life but is still determined to do right by her brother. She's a good balance of cynical and hopeful and I liked her sharp edges. Opal has definitely got street smarts, which go a long way in protecting her, but even with those she's still unable to resist the thrall of the Starling House. Imo, that house does her just as much good as she does it, and while Arthur does play somewhat of a role in her being happier and more put together, I think the house and feeling like she has a place she belongs is a big part of that as well.

Arthur was a harder character for me to get into the mind of. He's got his own dark past and is haunted by both the literal death of his parents as well as by the greater secrets and mysteries of Starling House. He's more remote than Opal is in his feelings, so I didn't feel as in tune with him, even toward the end of the book. Part of that might come from the fact that, while Opal feels everything despite being street savvy enough to hide it, whereas Arthur is a bit more emotionally closed-off and his studious nature doesn't really lend itself to opportunities that would open him up to others. That being said, I think I did like his character overall and he mirrors Opal quite well. Arthur's also actually quite funny at times.

Jasper, Opal's younger brother whom she has custody over, did frustrate me at times, but I also understand where he was coming from. In a town where nothing is free, even clean air, he has a hard time feeling like his sister taking care of him since their mother died is anything other than something he needs to pay back. At the same time, the love between Jasper and Opal comes through clearly and I absolutely love their relationship with one another and getting to see just how much they each love each other. It's hard to remember at times that Jasper is just 16, but then it shines through in moments of teenagehood, like when he doesn't want to come home from a friend's house.

Bev is the woman who runs the motel Opal and Jasper live in, and she's a bit of a trip. She has a harsh demeanor, but it's clear she cares for both of them and her love language is just insults, lol. Charlotte, the local librarian, is the opposite of Bev and is pretty cheery, though she's willing to go balls to the walls when needed.

One of the central themes in this book is family, and I loved seeing how family trauma played out differently for Arthur and Opal while also being so similar. Opal only ever knew her mother, and their little family unit bounced around from car to motel, never quite having a stable place to call home. Despite the challenges that came with a free-spirited mother, Opal clearly loved her parent and was devastated by her death, though she willingly fought to keep her brother. On the flip side, Arthur knew and loved both of his parents but clearly felt bogged down by the pressures that come with Starling House. When his parents died, he was also devastated but took up the mantle of responsibility with resentment. Both Opal's and Arthur's actions are primarily driven by their familial responsibilities, and it shows in vastly different ways.

Beyond that, I really liked how the family theme encompassed taking care of one another and how family isn't always the one you're born into. None of the characters in the book live as an island, no matter how much they might think otherwise, and I liked seeing how much they relied on each other and how selfless they could be when it came to one another. Found family is something the Starling House itself seems to call for, and you can definitely see how Bev, Charlotte, Jasper, and Opal make up their own little family, and how slowly Opal and Arthur begin including each other in that 'found family' circle.

Overall, I enjoyed this book and think it was a great read for the end of spooky season. I liked how it was dark academia without being too bogged down in itself and I really loved the characters and their relationships with one another!

[glassprism]

HELLO! I've started noticing random lyric changes in bootlegs of Broadway/West End Phantom... is there a timeline to why these changes occurred? Randomly? Is there any rhyme or reason? i.e. "Christine are you alright" in 2023 or the order of Masquerade lyrics switching in 2014 (?) or Bravi vs Brava. Just curious!

That's a pretty tall order, but I'll do my best! But there is definitely a rhyme and reason to it all, you just have to follow the timeline while taking into account that there will also be differences between productions and between actors as well. Keep in mind too that especially in its early days, it's not uncommon for a show to be tinkered with and it's lyrics altered as they get it running.

The first difference (if we don't count the Sydmonton production which was more of a concept production, but you can read about some lyric differences here) come between the original London production when it opened and the original London cast recording. There's already a difference in the 'Think of Me' lyrics, with the production opening with the lines, "Fly away, but when you lie awake" while the cast recording simply repeats, "We never said our love was evergreen", among other things. Furthermore, the London production had an extra line for Raoul in 'Little Lotte', where he says, in response to Christine talking about the Angel of Music, "No one could have sung the way you did tonight without a little help from him." By 1987 this line was cut, I assume because it's a tad redundant.

Many of the initial lyric changes came from 1988 Broadway transfer, such the changes to 'Think of Me', adding more lines for Piangi in 'Notes I', changing 'Wandering Child' from a trio to a duet, altering some lines in 'Point of No Return', flipping a line or two in 'Down Once More', and so on and so on. None of them make massive changes to the story or plot, but they are alterations all the same. You can read about all those changes here.

One more important addition was made in 1989, either for the opening of the Los Angeles sit-down production or the Toronto one, and that was the reprise of the line, "Help me to say goodbye" in 'Wishing You Were Somehow Here Again', which was added to end the song on a more powerful note. Since this was added in 1989, if you listen to any international productions that began before this period (such as Japan, Vienna, or the original Stockholm production), they will not have that additional lyric.

From here things start to get funky. Starting as early as 1990 in the London production, the production began using alternate lyrics for 'Wishing You Were Somehow Here Again', which began with the line, "Three long years..." There were used up until around mid-2002, when they were changed back to the more common, "Passing bells and sculpted angels". However, one or two productions that based their libretto off of London's would also use it, such as the Dutch production, and it would make a surprise return in the restaged US tour.

One other change I can think of came in 2006 with the Las Vegas production. Most of the changes in Vegas were because the show was cut down to a 90-minute, one act show, so most of them did not apply to other productions, but they did alter two words in 'Think of Me', going from, "Think of August when the trees were green" to "Think of August when the world was green". This is notable mainly because the line started showing up sporadically in other productions, such as the 25th anniversary concert (probably because SIerra Boggess was an original Vegas Christine) and Broadway.

From 2014 onward, another change: the song 'Wandering Child', which had been sung as a duet everywhere in the world except London, some of the UK tours, and some non-replicas, was changed back to the trio, and this was enforced across all productions except non-replicas, which can probably do what they want. That being said, there were still some lyric differences between London and other productions worldwide, which I go over here.

Finally, when the show was revived in London and reopened on Broadway after the COVID shutdown, there were multiple lyrics changed. The most famous is the one for 'Angel of Music', done to accommodate Christines of color but which underwent several changes in the first few months, but there are changes scattered everywhere, though some were reverted a few months later, which was just very funny to me. I go over it a bit here.

All right, got all the major timeline changes down? Great! Because now we're going to add another layer of complexity: production differences! Because as you might have noted, some productions have different lyrics between them, or will omit or add lyrics. The most notable are the differences between London vs. Broadway, and this is where you get things like the different 'Masquerade' lyrics (London has one version, Broadway has another that tends to be used worldwide), the use of "viper" vs. "vixen", Christine's hopes lying "shattered" or "murdered", and many others. I go over quite a bit of it here. Unfortunately, when the London production was revived, most of these differences were lost.

More changes came with the 25th anniversary concert, most of which were to accommodate the changed setting. These were then used in the restaged UK and US tours, but with even more alterations, with some again being done because of differences in the staging or props but others just because. I go over it here, and an additional one here, and I also discuss an old line being brought back to the concert here.

And finally, once you have all the timeline and production differences down, you have to account for the fact that in a few places, actors have a choice in what lyrics they can sing. One of the most famous is whether the Phantom chooses to sing "far-reaching gaze" or "fathering gaze" in 'Wandering Child', something that goes back all the way to the 1990s. Heck, some actors, like Hugh Panaro, will switch the word depending on their run or their mood.

And then when you get into "bravo" vs. "bravi" vs. "brava" (or "bravissima" vs. "bravissimi"), I can only assume it's a whole combination of the above. Keep in mind that both Raoul and the Phantom say variations of those words so it gets pretty complicated pretty fast. Officially, Raoul should say "bravo" and most do, but then in the Canadian production, whether due to direction or tradition, they almost all say "brava". Meanwhile, some librettos, such as the original and the Las Vegas one, state that the Phantom should sing, "Bravi, bravi, bravissimi", but later librettos, the 2004 film, or the RAH concert states it should be, "Brava, brava, bravissima". I wondered if they might be a little more consistent in the Romance-language productions (Brazil, France and the French dub, Italian dub, Mexico, Romania, Spain), but nope, it's all over the place there, which leads me to think that they don't actually care that much - except, naturally, for the Italian dub, which has Raoul congratulating Christine with, "Brava!" and the Phantom congratulating Christine with, "Brava, brava, bravissima".

So we'll see what they do in the actual Italian production! Don't let us down, Bradley Jaden and Ramin Karimloo.

[handfulofmuses]

Skunk shenanigans 3.0 aka the rest of everything they have to offer so far:

Question: Rough and Tumble vs (80's cartoon) Bebop and Rocksteady. Discuss.

Flynn: It would be a comedy of errors, it would be delightful. Each one of them trying to upstage the other, forgetting why they are fighting to begin with and kind of get distracted by that fact and what were they even setting out to do to begin with? They don’t even remember. They tore up a city block and it’s like …. why? Anything that could go wrong will go wrong and it would be delightful.

–

Question: So, Rough and Tumble have already met Zavok and I think their interactions were pretty interesting. So, what would the skunk bros reaction be to the rest of the D6? Can they keep with the Zeti?

Flynn: It’s more like can the zeti keep up with them.

Kyle, laughing: They just get exhausted by their constant obnoxiousness.

Flynn: Oh yeah. Like, Zik would have no patience for their idiocy. They’d be picking on Zor way too much, they would be raiding the kitchen and pissing off Zomom. They would be picking fights with Zazz all the time which would make HIM happy. And then Zeena, they would be kinda into her and then fight over her and she wouldn’t want either of them and they would hate her and they get distracted by something else and go off somewhere.

Flynn: And Zavok would wonder why he would bring them along, did he bring them along? Did they just follow him, he cannot remember.

Kyle, laughing: Well …. knowing them, they probably just followed him.

Flynn: That should be like a one off or something. Rough and Tumble come to Lost Hex and just inadvertently accidentally stopped the next invasion by the deadly six.

Kyle: -LAUGHTER-

Flynn: Just by being such nuisances.

–

Question:

I came again, sorry to be humble but I thought of another question for Rough and Tumble. How memey or trendy are they?

Flynn: They are the type of guys who once they catch onto the meme it is already a little stale. And they ride it until it’s well past its expiration date.

Kyle: Oh. So me and you. -laughing-

Flynn: Mhm. MHMHM. MHMHM.

Kyle: Ah no we were at the forefront of big oof man -laughing-

Flynn: oh god

—-

Question: Quick! The IDW Sonic cast are playing a match of Team Fortress 2 in 2Fort on their PCs! Tangle, Whisper and Jewel on team blue, the bash brothers Rough and Tumble, Starline, Kit and Surge in team red. Think they'll do the objective and work together as proper classes, or will they muck up and have everything end in "Failure!"

Flynn: It’s gonna be a mess, that’s for sure. I mean, Tangle’s gonna go-

Kyle: Why are there so many people on team red compared to team blue I mean I guess Rough and Tumble only count as one because they only have one brain cell to share between the two of them and I guess Kit and Surge are a package deal it’s kinda required okay fine nevermind i found it out

Flynn: You got Tangle playing scout and Jewel playing medic but she can barely keep up with Tangle as she is flipping around the map. That’s the worst possible thing you can do expect Whisper’s sniper and nobody can get across the bridge or into the base

Kyle: -Laughing-

Flynn: Surge and Kit have the exact same thing she is playing scout he is playing medic so they just keep bouncing into Tangle and Jewel and not getting anywhere or doing anything productive

Flynn: Rough and Tumble are constantly swapping between Demoman and soldier, arguing over which one is better and blowing each other up, launching each other off of the map

Flynn: And Starline built his base and he refuses to move. If he moves somebody might blow it up he has to be there to maintain it. No one can get to the intelligence he’s FINE you go do your job he’s doing his.

Kyle: -LAUGHTER- He is just sitting there strumming that acoustic guitar. This is like the most terrible game of Team Fortress 2.

Flynn: It works by saying it’s a highlander match where there is only one of each class. So Rough and Tumble are arguing over who plays heavy and they never actually get into the match.

Kyle: Wait are they arguing over who plays heavy or soldier or demo man? Or all three?

Flynn: It kinda goes in the circle.

Kyle: Right.

Flynn: “FINE YOU CAN PLAY HEAVY I’M GONNA MOVE OVER TO SOLDIER” “wait why are you on this side” “because he can shoot and he can rocket jump well” “well then I WANT to be him” “YOU WERE GOING TO BE HEAVY” “I DONT WANNA BE HEAVY NO MORE” and so on and so forth

—

Question: Rough and Tumble find Erazor Djinn’s lamp and he has to grant them three wishes. What do they wish for?

Flynn: -laughing-

Kyle: -laughs along-

Kyle: They just argue over who gets the wishes, don’t they?

Flynn: Rough wishes for unlimited wishes. Tumble wishes for more wishes than Rough had and they fight over it and at some point they managed to rub the lamp all screaming “WELL I WISH NOBODY GOT NO WISHES”

Kyle: Mhm. And they wouldn’t get any wishes ultimately is what you are saying.

Flynn: Yeah.

Kyle: Good. -laughs-

—

Question: What would happen if Rough and Tumble went into the haunted house from Night of the Werehog? The one with the ghost girl and two ghost photographers.

Flynn: -amused laughter-

Flynn: There would be a great deal of screaming and running into things Because the ghost girl cracks up at people being terrified. And the two other ghosts who just live to serve love to frighten people take photographs. Rough and Tumble would spend the entire night running from these ghosts, running into walls, getting turned around, not escaping, flash bulb in the face repeatedly and it’s a good thing Law is already a ghost otherwise she would laugh herself to death.

—

Question: what would Rough and Tumble do on Valentine’s Day? I assume they would look for pretty girls, flirt with them in a rude, obnoxious way, get rejected over and over, and blame it on bad luck and say “Whatever. Their loss.”. What do you think?

Flynn: I think you are right for the money expect for the “whatever” part. Because after they spend most of the day getting rejected, they ruin it for everyone else. Outdoor cafes? Stink bomber.

Flynn: Any kind of delivery van full of flowers? It’s getting upended.

Flynn: Romantic walks in the park? No sorry you are getting thrown off the bridge and into the river.

Kyle: Sounds good to me. Just absolute insanity. Just complete conquest from them over anybody else.

Flynn: Well, you broke their hearts. They really did crumble. So your day is gonna be ruined by Rough and Tumble.

Kyle:-laughing- Oh NOOO! OH NOOO! Now I kinda feel bad for them.

—

Question: Did Rough and Tumble ever steal a rhyming dictionary as mentioned in the beginning of the Zombot arc? I need to know if mine is in danger of being stolen from them.

Flynn: -laughs-

Kyle: It’s a big problem.

Flynn: I feel like there was actually a line about them having one but unfortunately it got cut for some reason, I can’t remember the details as to why.

Flynn: But yes, they absolutely have a rhyming dictionary. They have a thesaurus and it usually gets destroyed in an argument how to complete their signature rhyme and they have to steal another one. So yes yours is absolutely in danger. Be on the lookout for very angry skunks, looking for literature.

—-

Question: Rough and Tumble are cool and funny, how do you think they would react to their fanbase?

Flynn: First they would be surprised that they have a fanbase. That people pay attention to them in a positive way at all. And they wouldn*t necessarily know how to handle that. At first. And then they would just revel in it. Entirely too much. They like, coast on that to all the unhealthy degrees try to grift their fanbase. Like, they - is cafe press still a thing? They be turning out their own merch left and right and selfies just plastered on clocks and socks and whatnot

Kyle: And live streaming Q & A on instragram.

Flynn: Oh yeah, yeah, yeah.

—-

Question: I know Rough and Tumble are a duo, but who would you throw on their team to make it a trio even if it was only temporary, and what would their team name be? There’s something so fascinating about sticking to a hard number, in this case 3, and matching who fits which type and what the team name is.

Flynn: That is the hard thing. Their entire gimmick is that they are a duo so anyone who comes in would be a third wheel. And it’s just the question of who would be the funniest third wheel to have at any given time. And who fits into their rhyming scheme the easiest. I will admit, in bad guys, I cracked myself up with them trying to create rhyme that included the entire team and everyone is just kind of rolling their eyes “why are we even with these people in that car” Rough was “THIS WAS INSPIRED COME ON” they are trying so hard to be team players and good boys

Kyle: They’re not bad. They just like to cause destruction and mayhem.

–

Question: I know Rough and Tumble are afraid of curses and Mummies, but do they have a huge fear of other paranormal activities like ghosts, monsters and other strange Inexplicable things?

Flynn: Of course not. They are MANLY men they ain’t scared of nothing they don’t fear no ghost or mummies and - what was that? What was that sound why is that door - that door was not open before ITS THE THING AT THE CLOSET RUN.

Flynn: Yeah, they are absolutely Scooby Doo and Shaggy level of jumpy at the paranormal.

Flynn: Now which one of them says zoinks I leave up to you.

—-

Question: When they get the ball, they won't fumble! It's Football time, with Rough and Tumble! Rough and Tumble learn how much money the average United Federation Football player makes and decide to make their own team. First, they have to kidnap-… I mean, DRAFT team members! As many or as few as you'd like, as they probably wouldn't know how many members make up an official team anyway. And thus, The Seaside City Skunks are born and make it into the league (somehow)! How does it go? Who do they try to draft? Do they make it to the Superbowl (legality be darned)? Does Seaside City file a lawsuit for using their name without permission? WHO IS THEIR MASCOT??

Flynn: Yeah so Seaside City actually has a team. It’s just they are like bottom tier. super lame, they have the bare minimum number of players to constitute a team but all of them kinda phone it in cause they know that they are just there to fill out the season so Rough and Tumble take it over no problem.

Flynn: But they realize real quick that they ARE the team at this point so they decide recruit more and they are sitting there thinking: Who can we get thats like fast and and strong and enjoys hurting people?

Flynn: “was that one…there was that one guy we worked with…” “YEAH TOTALLY”

Flynn: So they go to the Lost Hex

Kyle: -DYING OF LAUGHTER-

Flynn: They recruit the deadly six.

Kyle: I MEAN - YOU KNOW WHAT -KEEPS LAUGHING-

Flynn: And initially they are like -KYLE KEEPS LAUGHING IN THE BACKGROUND-

Flynn: “What’s wrong with you guys”

Kyle: IT’S A BAD IDEA BUT IT’S ALSO A GREAT IDEA. -LAUGHS-

Flynn: And Zavok is like: this is stupid enough to actually have my interest. Let’s see this through. And sure enough they work well enough together just to defeat the enemy and they steamroll everyone else in the league.

Kyle: -laughing- Yeah. So it’s Space Jam.

Kyle: -can’t stop laughing- Do they hire anybody else? Or is it just those eight?

Flynn: Those eight? That’s all you really need.

—

Question: Rough and Tumble meet Team Rocket. What happens, and how peeved do each team get that those other guys have clearly stolen their motto gimmick?

Flynn: -laughs-

Flynn: There was this episode where Jessie and James go into a motto off with their rivals, basically shouting at each other trying to overrule the other. I imagine something like that with Rough and Tumble.

Flynn: But ultimately, they would lose out because they don’t have a Meowth. Like, that’s just the cherry on top.

Flynn: And they are just “we don’t have a hyp man to end our little spiel wow these guys are good”

Flynn: Meanwhile Jessie and James are having a team huddle going. “They can actually change their slogan on the fly? We have to stick to a script! They are so versatile we really need to think varying things!”

Flynn: And that’s how Rough and Tumble joins Team Rocket.

—-

Question: - Seeking employment, Rough & Tumble are hired by none other than DuckTales 2017's Flintheart Glomgold! Their mission? Just help him bust up Scrooge's mansion and take all his stuff! How do they lose to the McDuck Family, and how long before R&T get fed up with Glomgold's heart of flint?

Flynn: -laughs-

Kyle: -laughs-

Flynn, laughing: What an episode.

Kyle: Yeah.

Flynn: I mean first sure, they would be on board. All they have to do is bust up some rich guys place and take whatever they want, easy peasy.

Flynn: Huey has some kind of junior woodchuck guide book way of laying traps through the manor to catch one of them.

Flynn: Louie just cons the other. He’s like “hey you taking our stuff?” “Yeah what are ya gonna do about it?” “oh nothing you can take the cheap stuff” looking at this solid gold “this is cheap???” “yeah you want the real stuff? come with me” and is leading him through the manor through trap after trap “keep coming the real stuff is down this way” leads him to the back exist “well here you thanks for the tour” “WAIT A MINUTE” and you know the third or fourth time they manage to get expelled from the manor, Glomgold is completely done with their antics “IM NOT EVEN GONNA INCLUDE MY NAME IN YOUR INTRO ANYMORE”

Kyle: -DYING OF LAUGHTER-

Flynn: They are crawling back into the manor out of spite and Scrooge is like “what do you even want in here look I give you each five dollars just to make Glomgold’s day worse”

Flynn: Webby kicks them out at some point.

Flynn: Dewey got his own subplot and is oblivious to the entire ordeal.

…

Question: Tail swap! Tumble gets Tangle's tail while Tangle gets Tumble's… lack of a tail. How do they handle this?

Flynn: Tangle is perfectly fine, what are you talking about? She does not need a tail for balance - whoops. No, she meant to trip. Oh, she is dizzy. She will be fine, she can get used to this. One less thing to worry about no more brushing she will be fine JEWEL HELP

Flynn: Meanwhile, Tumble is having the time of his life. (Singing voice) “Floof, glorious floof! Tail goes on for miles now~ Here jump roof to roof!” he is doing cartwheels, gymnastic dance displays, he has not moved from a 5 radius he is just revving in it.

Kyle: Wraps it around himself like a scarf. Then accidentally chokes himself.

Flynn: And when they come to take it back he remembers oh wait, it can punch too. And he becomes one of the most formidable multi-med fighter you have ever seen.

--

Question: How would they react if someone asks for a picture and an autograph?

Flynn: They demand you pay them. After you do, they sign the autograph, mug you, and steal the autograph!

Kyle: I was thinkin' they would just end up just arguing with each other over who has the better signature, or something like that, y'know? Kyle: And they just get into a fight, and, y'know, would end up… your picture would be destroyed. You'd have no autograph, but they would still abscond with your money, because of course they would!

[crossover-enthusiast]

Do you have any random spooky month headcanons you want to share? This is an excuse to go on a rant about any sort of spooky month stuff that's been rattiling in your brain.

my brainrot is strong and I rlly like your headcanons so jhdskfhg

Firstly - thank you omg

Second! I have a bunch of headcanons but unfortunately my brain has decided to dump them all into a box and put them on a shelf I can't reach, so I'm just going to ramble about whatever

People almost never talk about Streber having technical know-how and I'm mad about that

Like the camera mirror is so clever, how long did that take to plan? How'd he come up with it?? Did he make the cape himself or did he get someone else to do it???

Also talked about this with @interdimensionalvoid a bit but I love the idea that Streber hates being babied, he is independent and wants to be scene as such

Another reason it sucks for him to be down an arm lmao

I don't want this to entirely be about Streber soo headcanon lightning round:

Radford is actually colorblind and his glasses are color corrective. Them resembling 3D glasses is just a funny coincidence

I keep flip-flopping between Dexter adopting cats as a buffer if he goes without work for a while vs him having one cat that he absolutely adores and would never harm because both sound really good

Rick is acquainted with most of the town bc of his job hopping

Also if Rick's in the mood for it he tells really good jokes

Frank has low empathy and is v selfish

He does genuinely care for Skid and Pump tho, and still cares for his old friend group (even if the only one he sees nowadays is Lila if he's lucky)

Also yes I'm not over the idea of them all being friends there is so much p o t e n t i a l

Jaune has ADHD and her husband has autism. Ross has... something, haven't figured it out yet

As an addendum to the above, all the Hatz are neurodivergent

The cult broke the thieves out of jail when they broke Bob out of jail, as a "yeah why not, they could be useful" thing. They gave the two an amulet to keep track of them and Fat Thief wears it under his sweater, not knowing he really shouldn't

They tried to pawn it off but the pawn shop just would not accept it for some reason

Dexter's funky eye is genetic and also a lazy eye. Both his glasses and goggles are prescription and even though it's technically fixed he still wears them

The Hobomen are army deserters. They probably could have found a job in town, but being hobos was more enticing

Shotty once tried to teach John's daughter how to use a shotgun and John nearly capped him for it

Speaking of her, she's friends with Robert's little sister! They're a Skid and Pump-esque duo and frequently get into Mischief

I have more but I'm still struggling to reach the box!! I'm open to headcanon dumping anytime though, just ask :>

[everybody-loves-purdy]

While I love the animations that recreate the books even with some changes. I feel like stuff like fan animations that would use OC’s and/or AU’s are a hard pass because I dislike that they try to emulate the style of it. It just feels like copyright infringement. I can appreciate the hard work that goes into them, but I wish people spent that kind of effort trying to make their own original thing instead.

To elaborate. I think there is a large difference between taking elements from a book series lore, and making your own sequel to another book series set in the same world with some of the same characters you didn’t create yourself.

And don’t like it when people say “This fanwork did things better than the original”. For one a lot of things people see as flaws WC are just something to the creators taste. It doesn’t make them bad. (Even if I can agree with the more problematic aspects of the series) and it’s also easy to make whatever you want when you’ve got a fan project without deadlines or exclusives or needing to make a profit.

Sorry if I didn’t word some stuff correctly or sounded really negative. I’m not trying to defy them of course. It’s just my opinion when people would often try to make AU’s/Fan Continuations. Take all of this with a grain of salt.

I think I see what you’re saying, but I do have to disagree. I think that AUs and OCs are a good way for people explore their creative side, and I have seen that I OCs and AUs for one thing become their own story eventually. That fandom space gives the creator a space to share their creations and if they want to keep it in that universe then fantastic, but sometimes they can reach beyond that. Some examples off the top of my head is how Rick and Morty was originally “Doc and Marty” which was a back to the future parody, and the whole thing about fifty shades of grey originally being twilight fanfiction, and I’m very sure Beastars started off as a fan creation in the world of Zootopia before it took on its own life.

I think fandoms are just an overall great space to allow people’s creativity to be nurtured through OC and AU works. And it’s not just writers, but so many artists and animators in recent years have gotten a start in fan spaces before going beyond that. Not everyone’s OC or AU is ever going to leave the fandom space, but if these things weren’t accepted, then some future original works, authors, or artists may never come to be.

It’s like now, as far as I understand, I’m no artist, but many budding artists go through a replication stage, where they try and replicate works while learning skills before eventually going on to make their own thing once they become comfortable enough replicating, I personally feel the same principle can apply with the creations of fandom OCs or AUs.

I think that “fan works Vs original” thing is just about individual taste myself, it certainly isn’t common for people to wish things had gone another way, especially in something like warrior cats where whether something is preplanned or not seems to be decided on a coin flip. But I think it should always be done respectfully and good faith unless it’s calling out something specifically problematic that the narrative presents as correct.

I hope I understood what you were saying correctly, and I’m just expressing my personal take here on it but I do get where you’re coming from

[thessalian]

Thess vs AI

So. The Bioware layoffs.

I actually am in the slow process of a Reddit argument about the use of voice actor AI because of this. And it got gradually dumber and uglier the more I debated. Which I suppose I should really have known would happen, because ... well, Reddit.

See, the reason the subject even came up is because there's a worry that, especially with Mary Kirby having been laid off, and Narrative Director and all that ... well, the concern is that they're going to start outsourcing their narrative stuff to AI. And this one individual was basically being The Champion Of AI, like, "Oh, I know some people will lose their jobs, but lamplighters lost their jobs when we got electric street lights; technology moves on! And cameras! If you wanted a portrait, you had to hire an artist, but now there are cameras and a lot of portrait artists suddenly had a lot less work but we could have as many pictures as we wanted! EMBRACE TECHNOLOGY!"

I ... had some things to say about this. Things like ... I don't believe that AI can properly capture nuance, at least not yet. And even if it could, once these companies have, say, a stable of voice actor's voices saved for AI use ... why would they want to hire new ones? Everything would become really stagnant in the industry on that scale, and you wouldn't have things like ... voice actors bringing something special to specific characters. I mean, there's a massive difference between Kai Leng from Mass Effect 3 and Joel from The Last of Us, but they're both still Troy Baker. Which Troy Baker would they get? Kai Leng? Joel? Logan? Booker DeWitt? Samuel Drake? Theron Shan?

That's when this individual started accusing me of being a snob, and eventually let out the real reason they championed AI. Namely, this individual wants to make video games, but doesn't want to code anything, nor dig up the resources for voice actors. No, they want everything ready for them to buy (or, more likely, pirate) so they can make a bunch of asset flips and stick them on Steam or wherever. They said, "You just don't want poor people like me to be able to maek video games".

I mean ... I do? I love indie games. I haven't got around to playing Darq yet, but that was one guy and a whole lot of work, so I can't help but be impressed. Solasta is janky as fuck and looks like an asset flip half the time, and the voice acting is not all that, but I still love it. You just ... make do with what you have.

Like ... if you can't afford voice actors ... don't have voices. Or find some drama students who want a warm-up project, or friends, and pay them in beer and residuals. But you don't go around exploiting people in a way that would kill an entire industry just so you don't have to find voice actors to make the game you want exactly as you want it.

In other words, I'm with the striking actors and writers on this (because while it doesn't get brought up, there's at least some worry about people being scanned and used in AI form going on in all that money-grubbing exploitative crap the writers and actors are fighting against) - "FUCK YOU; PAY THEM".

Buuuuuuuuut I know this individual is going to keep arguing at me because they want want want want want want ... but don't want to have to pay. It's another example about how art is commodified specifically so it can be devalued. Hell, I want to make a video game. Can I code? No. Am I pondering poking at Game Guru if I ever have a chance? Yes. Do I want AI voice actors doing the voices for me? NO. I have friends; I would ask them and promise them royalties.

This individual calls me selfish because I "don't want them to have things". I want the actors to have what they need to live because they give us things we enjoy. I want this entitlement bullshit as regards anything artistic to stop already. You want art? Pay for it, like anything else. But I'm probably going to stop responding at this point, because I have worked three hours of overtime and this person will not stop until they have the last word. Let them think they won. I stand with the voice actors, and everyone else who creates what I love. PAY AND RESPECT YOUR ARTISTS, FOR FUCK'S SAKE.

[castysandthedeep]

This concept has been eating through my brain like acid: life series Joel and Grian having insane bloody feral sex when they team as red lives, and then awkwardly mostly avoiding each other on green and yellow (I forget what fic said this but there’s a Joel-centric fic that described it as “that green life clarity” that I thought was so funny).

I’m thinking either primal top Joel x brat Grian or some kind of stricter gleeful dominant Grian with a still feral submissive Joel who’s doing his best to obey. I love your Grian from insatiable who’s theoretically a brat until he brats too hard by accident and ends up punting his partner into subspace. And then he’s a dom. Oops. And I love your Grian from lovegame who’s ever so frightening and everyone is TERRIFIED of him going red.

Also Joel like a tamed wolf etc… going insanely feral as a red life and being desperately, devastatingly loyal to whatever teammates he can scrounge up vs Grian who sees his allies as necessary sources of power and leverage but also as ultimately temporary, who is fully ready to strategically abandon his teammates as soon as it becomes advantageous to do so.

Anyways. Dynamic of: Joel being absolutely feral with bloodlust but trying so hard not to kill Grian and be the best teammate he can so that Grian doesn’t abandon him VS Grian who knows logically that he should drop Joel as soon as it becomes too costly to keep him as a teammate but who keeps instinctually protecting him + accidentally getting too fond of him anyways. Because one-sided devotion my beloved.

Sorry for the long and clinically insane ask. Just wanted to let you know. All my love!

this ask could not have found me at a better time. i'm in exactly the right mood to talk about insane red-life sex. (little sidenote, lovegame chapter 5 is about to drop very, very soon!)

i've written joel/grian before, both in a published fic where grian was afk and an unpublished fic i actually forgot existed until this very moment, but both of those fics were set in limited life, and this kind of dynamic feels straight out of last life to me. if i were going to write this (and i'm actually quite tempted, but i won't make any promises as my WIP pile is ridiculous right now), i'd definitely want to set it in last life. joel killing grian because he's lonely and desperate for a friend? the two of them wreaking havoc on the server together? it's perfect.

also, to me, the version of grian that's actually cold enough to hold joel at arm's length could only exist in last life. in every other season, it's clear that grian thinks he's the type of person to prioritize his own personal victory over taking care of his team, but he keeps getting emotionally attached anyway. he may pretend otherwise, but he always reveals his hand in moments of panic. i can see him overcompensating in last life and stringing joel along with the promise of companionship, putting off any actual vulnerability until it's too late... okay, i'm definitely doing a last life rewatch now.

as for the dynamic between them, i have a heavy personal bias toward dombottom grian as well as an undying fondness for joel getting his shit wrecked (and loving every second of it). that being said, i don't think joel would take it lying down. if he were on green or yellow i'd just call him a brat, but we're talking about red joel at his most violent and out-of-control. whether he'll actually successfully flip the script on grian remains to be seen, but the underlying possibility is always there, and grian is very uncomfortably aware of it.

so yeah, thanks for the ask! i didn't expect to get this enthusiastic about it, but i'm all in on the insanity bandwagon now. i can absolutely see myself writing this. the only real problem is that i can't see myself finishing it, because if i've got this much to say about it from the get-go, i could end up with another lovegame-sized project, and i've been incredibly busy with real-life things, so my writing progress has been moving at a snail's pace. if only i lived in a perfect world where i could sit around and write minecraft roleplay porn all day...

[beardedhandstoadshark]

Your ocs have to defuse a bomb. (that was hid in the house) what would they do?

I can give ya a joke version and a serious version! (The serious version is kinda dark so I slapped some cw‘s in red above it)

Anyways, joke version!

For the joke version, there’s Red. Ok,context: videogames. She is, upon other things, based on an oc for the first two games of the etrian odyssey series. Those still had an apothecary with its own NPC’s, and EO2’s was a certain guy named Dr. Derek Styles.

This is important, because I also played another funky lil game of theirs called Trauma Center : Under the Knife, a surgeon simulator.…who Dr. Styles happens to be the main character of.

In one of the missions you’re locked in a hall and have to use your surgeon skills to defuse a bomb.

Cue to Red ringing up her cousin living on the other side of the continent so she can run to the town apothecary and play the most hardcore round of "Keep talking and Nobody Explodes“ ever with their local medic (Or second-most, in Derek‘s case.)

As for the serious version…

Cw for mentions of death, lots of existential fear, despair, and detachment from reality (?). Also potential self-sacrificial tendencies? I’m very bad at guessing what these qualify as so just to be sure.

We good? Ok!

I‘m assuming they‘re locked in with no phone connection for some reason because otherwise they’d all have dipped! Especially Yel! And also that the bomb is strong enough to blow up the whole house and not just a grenade because otherwise they’d just find it and bunker up in the opposite corner! So!

Yeah he‘s not having a good time. First to try leaving and the last to accept it won’t work. Panic and mortifying, primal, fear. Takes a while to "calm down“ and even then he’s sitting as far as possible with tears until it’s defused and he‘s far, far away from the house.

Deniz would straight up not register he’s in danger. Or rather, he rationally knows it, but the fear itself doesn’t kick in really. It’s…detached? (Is that the right word?). So he’s actually pretty chill at the start, doing the most work to find it! Until he does. Find it. Then it’s a weird flip-flop between existential fear and more detachment spiked by a really weird feeling of calm and safety until it registers again that Oh Yeah. That‘s not the case at all, is it? He’s in danger. He might die. He could die. He will die. Yea I think at one point he’d just go and stay with Yel.

As for Mage, we’ve got guy severely lashing out because they can’t deal a second time with losing someone close and not being there there to stop it. Would you believe if I told you that "could Mage tank an explosion?“ is a genuine question I keep thinking about? It’s cuz of magic systems vs op abilities. Anyways. Since he’s basically always running around with at least some of the to-be-sold item stock, they‘d down every single buffing potion in one go, cast a big shield, and hope that if it does explode, he’ll survive the resuming magic recoil for long enough to find out if it at least worked. (Rn it probably would work, but barely.)

Violet has some basic knowledge about bombs because it was part of her education after the castle got a threat once, so she’d put on her serious mask to dispatch those who might be a treat to the situation rn and walk Red through the motions once it’s been found. She’ll either have plenty of time afterwards or be dead by then, so there’s no way she can afford to feel anything right now or deal with the others‘. (Spoiler: She does not properly deal with it afterwards. Girl pls stop acting like you’re fine.)

And even if any of the others wanted to do it, Red wouldn’t let them defuse the bomb in her stead. But it’s fine! Red’s the Hero, this is what she’s here for! To protect others! So she’ll protect her friends. They’ll just need to do what she says and let her do this. Red’s got this. Everything‘s in control, She’s got this in control. Nothing will turn out bad as long ad she’s here, because she’s the Hero, and nothing can happen to her. It won’t let her. Nope, no worries. She’s got it in control. It’s in control. Everything is in control. It’s in control. It’s in control. ITS IN CONTROL. ITS IN CONTROL ITS IN CONTROL SHE‘S IN-

Oh hey, would‘cha look at that. The bomb‘s defused. See? Told ya it‘d be fine as long as everything goes Red‘s way :)