#because human hydration had to come from somewhere!!!

[aurorialwolf]

Ariator incorrect quotes!!!

Inspired by Spot doing some for Allan and Callisto :3

Last time I did this, I skipped over the shipping ones because Aria and Raitor weren't quite together yet,, and they still aren't official, but definitely clearly something, soooo

Not all of these are shipping though some are just funny pfft

Aria: So what's for dinner? Raitor, staring at the food they just burnt: Regret.

fool!Aria: Stubs their toe FUCK! fool!Raitor: Mind your language! fool!Aria: What else am I supposed to say, “Woe is I”??? fool!Raitor: fool!Aria: You have to accept that swear words are necessary sometimes.

Aria: Man, I only ever see you awake, do you ever shut down or stop running? Raitor: Oh, I'm always running Raitor: The question is from what

imp!Raitor: Why would you think any of this was a good idea? imp!Aria: Probably because I'm a dangerous sociopath with a long history of violence. imp!Raitor: imp!Aria: I don't know how you keep forgetting this.

fool!Raitor: Oh, fiddlesticks. fool!Aria: Look, I understand this is a tense situation, but let's watch the fucking language.

Aria: There is no future. There is no past. Don't you see? Time is simultaneous, an intricately structured jewel that humans insist on viewing one edge at a time, when the whole design is visible in every fact. Raitor: …All I asked was if you wanted to cut your birthday cake first.

Aria: You are the love of my life and I would do anything within reason to make you happy. Raitor: I would be happy if you ate, stayed hydrated and got a reasonable amount of sleep. Aria: I said within reason, Raitor. How about I murder that guy? Raitor: So murder is in reason but proper self care isn't? Aria: Well, duh. What kind of question is that?

Aria: Raitor, you love me, right? Raitor: Normally I’d say yes without hesitation, but I feel like this is going somewhere I won’t like.

More under the cut!!

Future prime!Ariator perhaps :3c Aria: Do you love me? Raitor: We’re literally married. Aria: Yeah, but as friends or— I find this one especially funny because I did almost marry someone to give them a visa once!! Auro lore :D!

Raitor comes home absolutely drunk. Aria: Cuisle, are you.. coming to bed? Raitor: No thank you, I’m sure you’re lovely but I have a girlfriend. Raitor: Lies on the ground and falls asleep Aria: …

Aria: Raitor and I are no longer friends. Raitor: ARIA THAT IS THE WORST WAY TO TELL PEOPLE THAT WE’RE DATING!

I did edit this one slightly, also I feel like Aria would make a joke at the expense of Raitor's British accent given that she's Irish, and yknow, the British and Irish... Raitor: What were you doing in my bed? You were supposed to sleep on the air mattress on the floor! Aria: I had a nightmare. Raitor: You had a nightmare?? You're a dreamwalker! Aria: Listen, I needed to feel comfortable and I was getting this odd power dynamic vibe from me sleeping on the floor and you sleeping up there- Raitor, in a posher accent: Why yes, how high and mighty I am up on my twin XL! Aria: That is not what I meant— Raitor: Silence in the presence of your king, who sleeps a lofty twelve and a half inches above the ground! Aria: Listen, I’m not ashamed. I slept comfortably when I got up on your bed and I’m sure you did too. Raitor: Yeah, okay- Aria: You know what? I wanna know. How’d you sleep last night? Raitor: …That was the best I’ve slept in a while. Aria, gasping: The king slept comfortably with a peasant in his bed! Raitor: I did not agree to this- Aria, dramatically: But my liege, our love is forbidden! Raitor, on the phone: Hi, is this DAMN support? Yeah, there’s a bed bug in my dorm and he’s five-foot-eight, he’s got red hair.

fool!Aria: Don’t worry, I have a few knives up my sleeve. fool!Raitor: I think you mean cards. fool!Aria, pulling knives out of their sleeves: No, I do not.

This one would be pre-Aria-leaving-the-Academy in the Imperium imp!Aria: I went through an entire character arc recently imp!Aria: I became more evil if you’re curious imp!Raitor: We can fix this, don't worry, there's time for a redemption arc still! imp!Aria: I’m going to get worse on purpose

fool!Raitor, going over fool!Aria's resume: Okay, so right here, it states that you’re creative. fool!Aria: Yes fool!Raitor: Okay... may I know what you create? fool!Aria: Problems.

And here are the quote generators I used!!:

https://incorrect-quotes-generator.neocities.org

https://codebeautify.org/incorrect-quotes-generator

https://perchance.org/incorrect-quote-generator

@lancerthatisntfree @original-bookshelf @twice-damned-birdie @riotkitsune @localpigeon22 @ryn-halo26 @moonvalley94

[my-head-is-an-animal]

The Climb

Summary: You're a scientist, an engineer to be exact. Called to a meeting you had no real right to be at, Optimus Prime takes an exclusive interest in you, but you can't help but ask yourself at every turn, Why?

Rating: 18+ 🌹🩸🍆

Story Masterlist

Chapter 17

Optimus felt silly, he didn’t know what he was supposed to say to Jane. The whole point of sharing his Spark, the initial idea anyway, was so that she would know him and the need for words would be non-existent. It occurred to him when Lennox was speaking with the Autobots, there was still so little he knew about humans, about their customs. If he wanted to be with Jane, he needed to learn, fast.

     She had been transferred to another room, mostly because Smith had been pestering the doctors and generally making a nuisance of himself, disturbing other patients. It was in the best interest of everyone.

     Optimus was able to talk to her better on a higher floor, the windows open and a gentle breeze circling her body. He’d heard she had been struggling with a fever recently, but they were unsure why or how to deal with it properly. Optimus wondered if the Spark had something to do with it.

     ‘Jane.’ He whispered, close to her. ‘I am here.’

     The rest of the base was leaving for the night and the Autobots were heading back to the hanger. It was as private as could be, but Optimus wished he could have sat on the hillside with Jane again. He wanted to speak to his wife in the place that now meant so much to them both.

     ‘Captain Lennox believes that speaking to you is a wise choice.’ He really didn’t know what else to say. ‘But I am unsure why. I believe it is a human concept, one I need you to explain to me in more detail… please wake up.’ The slightly quake in his voice was undeniable. Optimus figured if this was one of the only chances he got to speak to her, he may as well have made use of it. ‘I am uncertain of what will happen if you do not awaken soon.’

     Optimus looked around him, a part of him was very frustrated that she couldn’t talk back, this all felt silly and unnecessary to him. What was it really achieving?

     ‘Oh sorry.’ A voice came from the door of Janes room. ‘I didn’t mean to disturb you, I was just checking her vitals.’

     ‘Of course.’ Optimus would rather know with numbers if Jane was okay.

     He watched the doctor who was looking after her, the way she was so gentle, never disturbing Jane’s body too much and… talking.

     ‘Alright Jane, things are looking good,’ she said cheerfully. ‘Looks like your hydration levels are back to normal, your muscular injuries are on the mend as well… and it looks like you’re on a good road to recovery. Keep up the good work.’ She smiled and made some quick notes before moving to leave the room.

     ‘Doctor.’ Optimus stopped her, she seemed nice and cheerful, but he’d heard from Lennox that she was also fierce enough to protect Jane from the likes of Smith. ‘May I ask, why do you talk to her?’

     The doctor smiled and approached him.

     ‘I’m glad you’re here Optimus,’ she said. ‘Talking to patients is something I’ve always done, it’s something I encourage all the friends and families to do.’

     ‘But she cannot respond. I do not understand the purpose.’ Optimus tried not to let his frustration seep in too much.

     ‘Well, it’s not for you.’ The doctor explained. ‘Our unconscious bodies are still aware of the things happening around us, noises and smells are powerful tools that can be used to help a patient find their way back to us. You’re not talking to her for you, you’re doing it for her, so that she knows you’re out here somewhere waiting for her to come back. And when she’s able to, she’ll wake up.’

     Optimus thought about it, there was still a lot he didn’t understand about humans, he hoped that Jane could be the one to explain things, but the doctor’s explanation made sense to him, enough that he didn’t feel as silly anymore.

     ‘Thank you.’ Optimus bowed his head slightly to show his gratitude.

     ‘Of course, let me know if you need anything. I won’t be far.’ The doctor smiled again and left Optimus with Jane once again.

     He took a moment and thought about what to say.

     ‘Jane,’ he started. ‘There are things we need to talk about, things I cannot hope to face without you. Your bravery is being questioned by those in command, I will defend you until my dying breath, but you must wake to fight with me.’ Optimus closed his eyes for a moment. ‘I miss you. I would like nothing more than to find you through my Spark, but please understand, we do not know what will happen if I disturb you for any reason. I am sorry if I have caused you such pain that you are unable to withstand our union, but I believed it was the right course of action. I would have given myself to no other. I love you.’

     Optimus had never said it before, it was a human way of expressing the depth of feeling for another, but again, words fell so far short or what he felt.

     Optimus remained almost the entire night and there was no clear change in her condition. He hated to see her this way, so helpless and unable to revive herself.

     He returned every night for a week to talk to her, hoping there would be some indication of change in her condition, but there was nothing. The fever was still present and the doctor couldn’t figure out why. Optimus worried that his Spark had set in motion events in Jane’s body that couldn’t be fixed.

     Captain Lennox was starting to get irritable, as was Jane’s friend Theo. Both believed that Optimus should have tried to make contact if he could. Theo, in particular, was insistent on it.

     ‘I don’t care that she married you and never told me!’ He yelled in the empty Autobot hanger, tears streaming down his face. ‘I just care that she survives! I need my friend back and you can help!’

     Optimus looked down at the young human, sighing and getting onto one knee, showing Theo the respect he deserved.

     ‘I am sorry that you feel this way,’ Optimus began. ‘And I am sorry that she never told you of us, but Jane’s responsibilities lay with something much bigger than you or I. Her focus needed to remain on climbing the ship, everything else was sacrificed.’

     ‘Except you.’ Theo whispered, his whole body shaking with grief and anger. ‘I’ve known her all my life, you knew her all of a few days and you think that gives you the right to care more than me!’

     It was clear to Optimus that no matter how angry Theo’s words made him, he needed to allow him to vent at the one person who he could blame for everything.

     ‘They say you talk to her every night, but what could you possibly have to say?’ Theo was touching sensitive nerves now. ‘You don’t know her.’

     Theo had seemingly run out of words. He wiped his eyes roughly with his arm and stormed out of the hanger, leaving Optimus with more doubts than he’d ever had.

     He returned to Jane’s bedside that night and told her all about Theo’s words and how awful he felt that he’d caused such pain. There was a vague hope that if Optimus spoke about the people she loved, she might have found it easier to wake up and come back to him.

I couldn’t see anything, the wind blew so violently that it forced my eyes to squint, occasionally I would see some kind of device, or sheet of metal fly passed, barely missing me. I knew I could hear screaming, but I couldn’t tell what direction it was coming from. I needed to find shelter.

     My body was heavy, I couldn’t feel an injury, but my leg felt like part of it was missing, when I looked down it seemed fine, there was no blood or even pain, but the second I tried to use it, I would fall and end up crawling.

     I was sure every time I blinked, I could see space, like my vision was caught between this strange, raging, metal storm and the cold, silence of space.

     I couldn’t tell what was real.

     Surely none of it was, but then why did I feel the shards of glass and metal scratching my skin and my organs freezing when I closed my eyes?

     I limped in no particular direction, sometimes crawling if I couldn’t get up, trying to find somewhere to rest. I was so tired and weak.

     Suddenly a loud crack sounded from somewhere behind me. I turned, but saw nothing. Another crack from an entirely different direction. Was I in the middle of a lightning cloud?

     I turned in time to duck out of the way of a large sword hurtling towards me. It lodged itself in the ground not far from where I was, but soon began sinking. Something told me, I needed that sword. I launched my body towards it and grasped the handle.

     ‘OPTIMUS!’ It wasn’t just someone shouting for Optimus to save them, it was a war cry.

     The ground began to shake. Something was coming for me. More than something, probably a thousand somethings that I couldn’t do anything about.

     Without warning, I felt my body charge of its own accord, lifting me up to fight.

     I was suddenly holding a shield to go with my sword and found myself sprinting toward the sound of the war cry, yelling one of my own.

     It was Megatron.

     He cackled as I came running towards him, swinging his own sword down onto me. I lifted my shield and held my ground, trying to find an opening to strike back. Megatron’s swings came down harder and harder, I was weakening again, until finally, my shield was cracked, my sword destroyed and failure filled my heart.

     Wait, my heart. I didn’t have a heart. Why didn’t I have a heart? Where did it go? What was there now? Why would I assume something else was there? Why was I fighting Megatron? Where was Optimus?

     Wait.

     I lifted my hand to hover over where in my heart should have been, there was no pulse, nothing to say I was alive anymore.

     Another crack.

     Something had happened. Something important I needed to remember.

     Another crack.

     How was I supposed to live without a heart? Was I already dead? The wind. It was a metal storm because that was the last thing I remembered. The climb.

     I climbed thirty thousand feet to save the world. No wonder I couldn’t stand properly.

     Another crack.

     What was that?

     Another crack, but this time, I saw it. A streak of blue light whipping around me as if it were the thing that was containing the storm and me.

     ‘Why are you doing this?’ I shouted. Why was I shouting? Was it alive? Was it watching me?

     Suddenly the storm stopped. Everything froze. I could see it. I was surrounded by electric blue light. Housed by it. Caged.

     There was something memorable about it, something I’d once known.

     ‘Optimus?’ I frowned. ‘Where are you?’

     The storm began to clear, but the blue light expanded, like it was showing me more of what was inside.

     I thought initially it was some kind of breakers yard, but now it was more obviously images frozen in time. Battles. Each one contained someone I knew, Optimus. Each one also contained enemies I knew and some I didn’t.

     What was this place?

     ‘Nightmares.’ I whispered. ‘His nightmares?’

     I began walking through the only path I could see. A winding metal platform that showed me each battle Optimus had ever fought in and all the ways he was scared he’d lose.

     Eventually I was able to recognise each in his memories, but there were gaps, things were missing. Memories.

     ‘Where are the rest?’ I found myself asking.

     ‘What do you need?’

     I spun around to see Optimus Prime himself, standing tall and strong.

     ‘Optimus.’ I breathed, relief. ‘Where are we? What is this place?’

     ‘What do you need?’ He repeated.

     ‘I don’t understand.’

     ‘How do I help you?’ He stepped towards me and for a split second everything was clear.

     ‘His Spark.’ I breathed again. ‘You’re his Spark.’

     ‘I am your Spark, Jane Harding.’ He said, as if it were obvious. ‘But I don’t know what you need.’

     ‘What do you mean?’ I asked.

     ‘You are dying. And I cannot stop it.’ He kneeled, his kindness and desperation clear for anyone to see. ‘What do you need?’

     I felt something heavy sit in my chest, I placed my hand over it once again. ‘My heart is gone.’ I whispered. ‘I need it to live.’

     ‘I can be your heart.’ Optimus said, immediately. ‘But what does a heart do?’

     I could hear the slight panic in his voice, maybe the situation was more dire than I realised.

     ‘It… it pumps blood around the body.’ I said, suddenly finding it very difficult to know anything about the human heart. ‘It does it at a rate the body requires. More exertion means more blood needs to be pumped, it does this via an electrical charge, not a big one, I don’t think. Actually, I have no idea of the right measurements.’

     ‘I can find out.’ Optimus nodded. ‘I don’t understand this body, Jane. I do not understand how it works. Everything I have tried, has failed.’

     I thought for a moment. ‘Can you wake me up? I can find out the information, I can help you stop me from dying.’

     ‘I’m afraid you are too weak to wake now.’ Optimus shook his head. ‘But I can send a message to Optimus. He can help us.’

     ‘How?’

     ‘In time, I can teach you, but for now, I must save you.’ Optimus lifted his hand and gently traced the tip of his finger around my face. ‘Sleep deeply, I will wake you when I am finished repairing your body.’

     Everything went black.

If you liked this, please consider supporting me ☕ thanks for reading!

[newtthetranswriter]

Choso at Pride

Word Count: 1264

Paring: Choso x Transmasc! Reader

Summary: While at Pride, a karen tries to cause problems only to have her spirits crushed. Followed by some sweet cuddles after a long day

Warnings: Bigots being Bigots, the usual homophobic and transphobic reasons for being assholes, let me know if I missed anything

A/n: Just a little Choso pride fic. For the record I have never been to a Pride festival for many reasons though I’m hoping to go to one this year. Also I ship yuji and megumi, if you don't agree either deal with it or move on. Anyways enjoy and remember to hydrate or diedrate.

    Choso may have not been a person for long but he couldn’t wrap his head around the idea that there are people out there, who hate people for expressing themselves. When his partner told him about Pride and how it was a celebration for the people who were part of the LGBTQ+ community to show that they are happy to be who they are, he couldn’t help but want to join in on the fun. Afterall his partner was part of said community and after some self reflection he also decided he fell somewhere in the community. So the morning of the Local Pride festival, Choso helped Y/n get ready before heading to the park.

   “Choso, I’m so glad you wanted to come with me, It’s going to be so fun.” Y/n shouted as they got closer to the busy park full of so many different happy people.

   Choso smiled as he held their hand. “Of course, why wouldn’t I come celebrate the person who has helped me adapt to the world the most.” His smile was infectious as he pulled them in for a quick kiss.

   As they entered the park they were greeted by rows and rows of different vendors selling various pride themed items, most clearly hand made and perfect for the event. The two wandered the festival browsing the various booths, occasionally striking up conversation with those running them. Eventually they came to an area dedicated to some food trucks and decided it was a good time to take a break and get a snack.

   “You sit and take a breather, I’ll go get us something to eat okay?” Choso directed as they approached a small table near one of the many food trucks.

    Y/n nodded, accepting the offer to just sit for a minute. Walking and dancing around the park had started to cause some aches and pains so they were thankful. Fanning themself with their large Nonbinary flag fan, Y/n decided it was too hot to continue wearing their black ‘We are all human’ shirt opting instead to place it in their bag. With the dark shirt out of the way, their Binder which was colored to look like the trans flag was now on full display. 

    As Y/n waited for Choso to return with their lunch, they heard footsteps fast approaching from behind them. Expecting it to be a fellow Pride goer coming to strike up a conversation about their binder or something, Y/n turned to greet them. Unfortunately, it was not someone looking to be friends, instead it was very clearly one of the many protesters they had seen throughout the park.

   “How can you so disrespectfully damage the body god gave you? You’ll go to hell if you don’t change your ways and abandon such satanic practices.” The Karen said pointedly. Y/n just rolled their eyes, taking in the fact the woman was holding a sign spouting something about trans people indoctrinating children. “You are putting children at risk by supporting such dangerous things.” Y/n had fully turned away from the lady knowing that she just wanted a confrontation. “You turn away because you know I’m telling the truth. You turn your back on god.” At this point Y/n was ready to just get up and go find Choso. “Such a beautiful young lady like yourself should be at home taking care of children, not defiling your body and indulging in the lies of these groomers.”

   Y/n truly had wanted to ignore the woman’s nonsense but calling them a lady and then spouting the same ‘they’re all groomers’ bullshit, pissed Y/n off. “First off, I never asked for your opinion. Second, what do you get out of telling people their life is not something you approve of? How many people have you spouted the same nonsense at, have actually changed because you told them they were going to hell?” They asked, turning to the now bewildered woman. “Judging by the shock on your face, none. So, instead of being mad that I have people who love and support me for who I am, you go home and worry about how your kids never call.” With that Y/n grabbed their bag, getting up and searching for their brunette boyfriend.

   As they were looking for Choso, they heard a familiar voice. “Love, I thought you were going to wait at the table for me?” Choso asked, approaching them with a confused look on his face. “Did something happen?” He noticed the slightly irritated look on Y/n’s face.

  Y/n sighed as they accepted the plate of food Choso had offered them. “It’s nothing important, just your average transphobe telling me I’ll go to hell for ‘defiling’ the body god gave me.” They said as they took a bite of the food. “Don’t worry too much I put her in her place and then came to find you. Let’s walk around while we eat.” They suggested leading Choso away from the makeshift food court.

   Choso nodded, knowing that if the encounter had really upset Y/n they would have told him. So they continued through the area, occasionally stopping to buy little things that caught their eyes. After they finished their food they kept walking around enjoying the atmosphere. As the afternoon shifted to evening, the couple decided it was time to head out.

   Once they made it home and were laying on the couch reminiscing over the day, Choso brought up what had happened when they were separated. “Are you sure you’re okay? I know you said it was fine, I just want to make sure you are 100% okay.” His concern was clear as he looked down at where Y/n was resting on his chest.

   They lifted their head placing a quick kiss to his nose before responding. “I’m 100% sure that I’m fine. Had it been a problem I would have told you right away. Plus I think you should be more worried about how much money you spent on Pride merch.” They turned to look at the mini mountain of assorted items that made it look as if a Pride explosion happened on their coffee table.

   “Hey, I have to support the community and plus not all of these are for us. Some of those things are for Yuji.” He stated as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. 

   Y/n raised a brow at the half curse before questioning him. “Why? I thought he and Megumi were going to Pride themselves, couldn’t he have bought stuff then?” They asked, perplexed. 

   Choso chuckled. “Shortly before I ran into you with our food, Yuji called me. Apparently they were called for a last minute mission and couldn’t go. He asked me if I could grab them some stuff since they couldn’t go.” He explained.

   Placing another kiss on Choso's face, Y/n smiled. “Have I ever told you how much I love you?” They asked jokingly. Choso pretended to ponder the question, before shaking his head no going along with the joke. “Well, I love you so much. You are such a great brother and great sorcerer. And most importantly you are an amazing boyfriend.” They said finishing their sentence with a final kiss on the forehead.

   Choso smiled at them, placing a kiss on their lips. “And you are the most amazing partner I could ever ask for.” After sitting for a moment they both relaxed back into the couch both falling asleep in each other’s arms.

[puhmpken]

Hii!! How are you? I’m here to request something if that’s okay :D anyways I’ll start!

I was wondering if I could request Alastor with a GN! Reader who has a Yuno Gasai Personality from Future Diary? Everything should be explained in the link I setted here ^_^ have fun with this!

素敵な一日をお過ごしください。

this has NOT been edited

Authors Note: I am doing good! I am excited because this is my first request, while I am working on upcoming books! But ofc I can do this! I hope this is too your liking and you enjoy it!

Make sure your staying hydrated, healthy & happy! <3

In the sprawling labyrinth of Hell, where souls clash and demons reign, a presence lingers & hides in the shadows, fixated on one soul.

“I have been watching him for so long,” Y/N murmurs softly to themselves, hidden from view, there (e/c) reflecting the dawning red in the sky, their eyes trained on Alastor as he strolls through the chaotic streets of Pentagram City.

“I know his favorite music..the whiskey he savors at the bar. I watch him whenever I can and read all the papers about him.”

“Many say he’s a menace, deserving the blade of a exterminator’s spear through his heart. While others don’t view him fondly, labeling him as mean and ruthless.”

“But those people no longer exist.”

Title: Diary of the Obsessed (oneshot)

Written/Edited By: @puhmpkins-blog 🎃

In the heart of Hell, where chaos and darkness is on every turn and corner. Sinners run free and practically wild, while some quench the thirst for blood due to their human life. Others take shelter wanting to hide and keep there head for another day to come.

Alastor was one of those chaos, he was a overlord in hell. Who was powerful, many feared him, while others want to kill him and take his spot. You weren’t that case at all. You can’t remember how or even why you got to hell, but you assumed you had committed sin..maybe you stole candy from a baby smh.

It’s a blur, you just remember waking up to a red filled sky with a pentagram and the rest was history. You were a quiet soul, never bothering anyone and always moving swiftly to get where you needed to go. Everything in this “hell” life was boring, it was merely black and white for you. Well all up until you bumped into a deer demon.

He was a overlord in hell, but that’s not what attracted you to him no..no far from it. It was the way how he carried himself, walking with the ego of a god, talking with so much wit and passion about certain sinners. You couldn’t help but feel under a trance by this demon, it was a spark in your dead heart. It felt like it was beating again and dancing to the sound of his voice when he spoke.

You enjoyed this feeling a lot, it made your life easier, gave you a reason to go outside and stroll around.

You sometimes hid in the dark of corners or walk across the street from him to watch him in the corner of your eye. You can tell he wasn’t aware of your doing, just going on with his day doing his normal set routine. This slowly morphed into a obsession with the radio demon you had.

Your once normal life, was filled with stocking or running into him. Maybe he would catch on? But it didn’t faze you, it only pushed you more. It was like a game of a mice catching cheese.

Morning. The sky was always filled with red, the screams of the few who woke you up out of your sleep.

Yawning sitting yourself up. You lived by yourself in a single, almost run down apartment on a upper building floor. You couldn’t complain to much about it, your lucky to be even living somewhere like this, you could’ve been going in and out of motels but you had a place to call home..kinda of

Today was like any other day you got up from your bed, the wood creaking under you with every step you take as you made your way to the bathroom.

Going through your daily routine to fix yourself up and put on your work clothes, you brushed out (h/l) white, sandy tan hair. Making sure to style it correctly. You were a worker under Rosie in her emporium, the job didn’t call for a lot of action, all you had to do was seat behind a desk in the front near the door to ring up customers as the purchased whatever items they could find in her store.

And she carried a lot.

You were her only worker, well besides Franklin but she had disappeared a while after a recent extermination under questionable circumstances, you didn’t need a psyche to put two-and-two together to known Rosie may had something to do with it.

But nevermind that, you made your way out the run down apartment with nothing in hand besides a bottle of water, and the keys to your room hidden away in your pocket. You wore clothes appropriate to the job and ones that Rosie wouldn’t be able to say a witty comment about.

The doorbell chimed as you pushed it open, being first greeted by the smell, of flowers mixed in with smell of something being made you couldn’t put your finger on it, but it was almost like meat?

You sat down behind the desk as you cupped your hand towards your mouth before saying

“Ms. Rosie! Where are you?” You waited a moment as it went quiet, the lights where on? That means she had to be here..somewhere. You turned your head sideways, leaning a ear out to possible hear any nearby movements, no clicking of a heel or laughter to hear, which is peculiar for her in most cases.

‘Maybe I thinking to much, and she just went outside for a moment’ You tell yourself as you walked behind the counter setting up your little check out station.

Just as you finally finish up your station, you hear a bell that chimes. A scruffy looking demon fella wasn’t too tall, he held a box about the same size of his chest,

“I have a uh umm package for Ms. Rosie” He said as his eyes began looking at you before the drifted off away from you probably looking at the different items, ‘fella probably never been inside of a emporium’

“I can take it” You say as he approaches your counter placing the cardboard down on the table, signing off for the package he leaves

Grabbing the package, you felt a vibration of sorts,’What in the..’ You thought to yourself, as you felt the box buzz..one time and then again.

‘That’s weird, what’s in there..’ You question to yourself, as you heard the third buzz go off. Your eyes drift to the clock hanging on the wall,

‘Great and it’s barely 10:40am’ You sighed, without Ms. Rosie there you, would more than likely have to run the store by yourself. Just until she gets there at least, you were kinda trained in it..just don’t let nobody steal from the shop and you keep your job

As the day slowly began to pick up, you moved the cardboard box down from your counter to under hidden from the eye of really anybody, unless they were to walk behind the counter, as the hour started to pass, you noticed something kinda peculiar..the box, it seemed to buzz every 10 minutes. You realized this, when you counted the buzzes you received..five buzzes the whole hour.

‘I gotta open it..’ You thought to yourself, as you waved by to the last person it was now 12 o’clock, Rosie still hadn’t made contact with the store or even appeared it almost like she’s gone missing or disappeared

Shutting the doors and locking them you lower the front dark purple blinds infront of the window, to hide from the public view, now it’s just you and the box. Walking careful towards the counter you squat down reaching under and in the desk grabbing the cardboard box, once grabbing it you stand back up and place it down on the desk eyeing it..

BUZZZ!!

Staring at it wide eyed, you grab a pair of box cutters carefully cutting open the box you see..

‘A phone?’ You said outloud almost dumbfounded as you tilted your head looking down as the closed device, it was a red phone, with black swirls decorating around it. Reaching in and grabbing it, you carefully rotate it around getting a good look at it, nothing too out of the ordinary. Just a regular what seems to be flip phone..

BUZZZ!!

‘Fuck!’ You thought as you quickly try to grab it as it slips from your hands the buzz nearly scared you as you weren’t prepared for it. Catching the phone you hold it, your heartbeat slowly down as you open it

‘Why is there ‘A’’ You thought blinking blankly at the phone ‘Why would Rosie want something like this..does she even understand how these work’ You snickered the thought of Rosie trying to frighten out what and how to work a flip phone made you laughed, as you pushed random numbers and hit random text you finally came onto a screen, that looked like a log of some kind it read..

Alastor 10:40 AM

Running to Mimzy Cafe

Alastor 10:50 AM

Will run into Huskier, and almost get into a brawl with him

Alastor 11:00 AM

Leaves Mimzy, strolls down Dahmer Blvd.

Alastor 11:10 AM

On Dahmer will see AD, and almost brawl with him

Alastor 11:20 AM

Goes to the ‘Happy Hotel’

Alastor 11:30 AM

Begins work

‘Who is this Alastor guy..’ You thought to yourself as you looked at the log, is this some diary of some kind, did he drop his phone? What the hell is happening and like a train it hit you..this wasn’t some regular demon, this was THE DEMON.. Alastor the Radio Show Host..

Weeks had pass since you acquired this strange artifact—

A/N: Srry a scrap put together oneshot, if i should finish it let me know ..

[duckprintspress]

Meet Aether Beyond the Binary Contributor ilgaksu

Wondering what Aether Beyond the Binary is and why you should care? It’s Duck Prints Press’s latest anthology, currently crowdfunding: 17 stories, modern aetherpunk settings, outside-the-binary main characters! Help us reach our funding goals by checking out the campaign now!

About ilgaksu: Full-time fandom cryptid, Furby enthusiast, and the human embodiment of that one gif of Elmo on fire, ilgaksu was born and raised in an  undisclosed location, living in several others, and now currently residing in [REDACTED]. Their interests include collecting haunted toys, using their artistic practice as an excuse to forget to do their laundry, and playing with fictional men like Bratz dolls. They have not unclenched their jaw yet today, but they do remember to drink lots of water. 

Link: personal webpage

This is ilgaksu’s first publication with Duck Prints Press.

An Interview with ilgaksu

What is your “dream project” – the thing you’d see as the culmination of your work as a creator?

I have a list of dream projects – a big queer space opera trilogy, a series of detective serials, I want to pastiche all of the genres I adored growing up – but I think I’m never going to find the culmination of my work. I’m going to have to make do with whatever I do while I’m alive, and other people can argue about that for me or something. The work is the work. It has to speak for itself without me defending it.

When you look at your “career” as a creator, what  achievement would you most like to reach – what, if it happened or has  already happened, would/did make you go “now – now I’m a success!”?

Does any writer actually get to the point where they fully believe they’re a success, and the feeling lasts forever? This is a genuine question. Where are they hiding? I want their advice.

What are your favorite snacks and/or drinks to consume while creating?

I have to have at least three emotional support beverages, and one of those will always be a form of iced coffee, then usually bubble tea, and then usually water. These are because I clearly run on three separate hydration systems. Snack-wise, I don’t tend to eat while I’m actually making things, but I like churros and loaded fries and ramen and salmon on bagels and, listen, I just really love food.

Describe your ideal creation space.

I like writing somewhere near a window, ideally when it’s raining outside, with three emotional support beverages and my favourite headphones and the very specific song that works as white noise in that moment on repeat. Possibly for the next five hours.

Do you like having background noise when you create? What do you listen to? Does it vary depending on the project, and if so, how?

I have to have background noise or I can’t focus to write, and it’s usually music with lyrics. I tend to have a mix of current songs I’m fixated on in a huge Everything playlist, and then I often have a smaller playlist for the project itself. Like I said before, I can also easily listen to the same song on repeat for as long as it takes to finish the necessary section, even if it that takes hours, because after a while I stop hearing the music itself – it functions as white noise.

Share five of your favorite books. (You can include why, if you want!)

Wolf Hall Trilogy (Hilary Mantel, technically 3 but)

The Dream Thieves (Maggie Stiefvater) 

Evensong’s Heir (L. S. Baird)  

Daughter of Fortune (Isabel Allende)  

The Magpie Lord (KJ Charles)

Share five of your favorite (blanks). 

Five favourite current bubble tea flavours: Earl Grey, Snow White, Rose, Lavender, Honeydew

If you could give one piece of advice to a new creator who came to you for help, what would that advice be?

You don’t want to write like me. 

That probably sounds incredibly arrogant, but let me explain: the most common thing I’ve had said to me by a new creator, or a fan of my work, is “I want to write like you.” And I get where people are coming from, and I get it’s from a place of admiration – which is very very flattering, of course – because early on in my writing career that used to be a desire that consumed me to. But my point is this. I realised that it was futile to want something like that, because I would never be that creator, with their experiences in life and reading that had informed how they view the world and filter it into their own work. Even if I tried to mimic it, and maybe if I managed it on a superficial level, it wouldn’t be animated by the same mind moving through it, and so I’d be doing us both a disservice. So, I no longer want to write like other people. I want to write more and more like myself. And because of that, I try and advise people to redirect how they’re verbalising that desire. What is it about my work, or anyone’s work, that speaks to you? What parts of it don’t work for you? What is it you want that’s similar – the assurance of their authorial voice, their breadth of lexis or grammar, the themes they focus, how they make you feel as a reader in that relationship with them through the text? Identify those things. Start from there, and think about who you are and take these little ingredients from everyone you’ve read and loved, and everything you love in the world outside writing. Do that instead. Not only will it help you identify more concretely the goals you’re working towards in your craft, but you deserve a voice as a writer that’s solely your own.

What would you say to a demoralized creator to inspire them?

The same thing I said earlier but reappropriated: nobody can write like you.

ilgaksu’s Contribution to Aether Beyond the Binary

Title: chameleon trick

Tags: be gay do crimes, be gay solve crimes, established relationship, heist, manchester, non-binary, past tense, present tense, suicidal ideation (mentions of), united kingdom, third person limited pov, trans man

Excerpt:

Sasha turns on him; gleeful, sparking with it. It’s less a dropping of a mask and more of a perfect, total illumination as they ask, “How did I do?”

You would think they were an amateur at this, looking at their borderline puppyish excitement. They even tilt their face up, less in expectation of a kiss and more in certainty of one. But they are both working. Martha has read the codes of conduct at this factory: no fraternisation during work hours. And so:

“I don’t have time for your praise kink right now,” Martha says, and sidesteps them.

End-of-post reminder: check out our campaign on Kickstarter! It ends January 25th – we’re about half-way done.

[holisticdetective42]

Three years. Three years I’ve survived in this god forbidden wasteland. All for what? To be surrounded? To be trapped in a fucking grocery store at my wits end with nearly no supplies and at least three Drainer ships outside? They came for the water. It’s ironic, I used to pride myself on keeping others hydrated and now… well I’ve watched everyone die. At least Flo went quickly. She was always so beautiful and cheery, I couldn’t have watched her slowly dehydrate like the rest. Not when she was always so happy. Besides, she always said she was nothing without her work. I shake my head, but it makes me a little wobbly. I shouldn’t even be standing right now. That damn insurance. Flo was always in work mode, selling to anyone with a car or a house. We were always so different, she was all about her job and I worked kids birthday parties for fuck’s sake. The kids used to love me, I’d do tricks while my wife sold their parents insurance. I never felt particularly bad for the insurance bit, as my tricks usually ended in property damage.

When they came, most didn’t know what to do. Flo was killed by drainers in the first week, shot right through the head because she thought being friendly with them might work. I was a little smarter. As long as I could get to a spot the drainers wouldn’t find, I could get into almost any building and be safe. I always had a talent for getting into places, and it was for that that I gathered a small group around me. Just a few people, but they didn’t mind how large I was or my unconventional looks. Something about the apocalypse makes you overlook the superficial differences. We lost most of the crew when the drainers learned English, started sounding like humans. It was just me and peanut until… well until today. He’d always been a little out of touch but I felt close to him. We were in the same boat really, before the drainers. Now it’s just me. Alone in the supermarket, and I have no plan, no ideas. Those were never my strong suit, I’m more of a burst-in-swinging kind of guy.

But I can hear them talking now. The drainers.

“The large strange one went in there. Should we follow?”

“I’m not sure. Was that red stuff… was it blood? The stuff that normally comes out of them? It looked different.”

“I’m sure it didn’t. And it’s alone after we killed the other thing. I think following it in and killing it quickly might be best.”

I hear the front doors to the store shatter, but I am too weak to move. At least they’re coming to me. I’m not sure exactly what it takes to kill me, but I know I could take at least two of these fuckers before I go down for good. I hear them approaching. They’re close now. Following my trail, I’m sure. I see the first one and he’s ugly as all hell.

“Are you prepared to die, earthling?”

I don’t dignify that with a response. The second one rounds the corner.

“Idiot, the ones leaking this much never say anything.”

“Just following protocol.”

The first one raises his weapon and points it at me. I wait for the shot because I want to see the look on the dumb fuck’s face. He pulls what I suppose should be described as a trigger and I feel the shot hit somewhere near my face. I can see red pouring out of me and I look down to put my finger in it. It occurs to me I’ve never tried any, so I take a taste. I’m fucking sweet, energizing, and delicious. I look up at the drainer and I see every other one I’ve killed. I see the one that took Flo from me. I look up at him and his friend and I stand until I tower over them as their faces on tort in what I can assume is fear. They haven’t seen this happen before. Now I’m looking down at them, right in the first one’s eyes, and I only have two words.

“OH YEAH!”

[wishingicouldfly]

View From the Ground: LTWT Nashville 7-18-23

Nashville needs to be talked about. It was glorious. Amazing.

We traveled from Boston to Nashville on 7/16/23 and did a couple of days of sightseeing. Broadway with it’s bars and music, an open-air bus trip, a backstage tour of the Ryman Theater, and of course breakfast at Pancake Pantry and a few meals of Hot Chicken.

Concert day dawned bright and lovely, and the Pinecones (the group chat name for our band of idiots) lined up in the queue at 6 a.m.—we were numbers 35-38 in the fan organized line just off property. Line was well behaved, and we were all really pleasantly surprised when the venue brought out waters, and respected the fan made numbered system. Our wristbands matched our fan line numbers.

We were sent off site and told to come back to line up at 3 p.m.—so back to the hotel to nap, eat and hydrate a bit. Coming back to the venue at 3 p.m., we knew the weather was up to something funky. We were told to shelter somewhere safe and come back at 4 p.m.—but at 4, the storm hadn’t quite reached downtown Nashville. The venue’s SM told us to shelter where we were until they gave the "all clear," which didn’t come until about 6:30. We had a chance to drink a couple of beverages and hang out until then.

Suffice it to say we were biting our nails by now. A couple of adult beverages might have been consumed. None of us were in a position to come back to Nashville for a postponed date.

But our worries were for naught, by 6:30 the skies had cleared sufficiently, and we made our way back to the line in our clear ponchos over our shirts and lined up accordingly.

The stress and the worry were worth it. We ended up at barricade to the right of the stage.

First up, The Great Rooks in their first show with Louis. They were fun, upbeat and so so energetic. I’m definitely going to be listening to more of their music.

Because of the delayed start, Andrew Cushin was taken out of the set and Louis came right out after TGR. He was phenomenal, as always. Gorgeous. On point. The band sounded great. Matt never took off his shades, so we think he lost the bet this time. Or drew short straw. Michael was on fire.

Louis sounded very slightly horse—perhaps the weather/moisture in the air, not sure. But he was just as powerful and energetic, with a dash of delicacy as he always is. He played to the crowd—worked both sides of the stage.

Now for the best part. The very end of Silver Tongues when he jumps off the stage and greets the fans at barricade…he ran down the line and jumped up right at the step right in front of where I was standing with my friends. He knocked off the hat I wore, and I touched his arm, just above the dagger. I will stand firm that I'm not the one screaming in the video, but to be honest, I'm not 100% positive it's not me.

I still can’t quite believe it. It was an unforgettable moment.

The show ended and we were still in awe of the moment.

Next stop, Boston.

Gorgeous gorgeous human.

[jumpywhumpywriter]

Happy new year (again if you read my other ask) whenever you have new year! Also I have a question about Shadow (the Falkry, not the hedgehog... Not sure why l'm clarifying this since you probably no but never hurts to double check Iol. Also kinda a joke? Gah, overthinking-)

Not sure if you've established it, but what were they like before their whole race/species got, uh, killed off (that does happen, right? I may accidentally be misremembering)? Do they have any memories of their childhood before the whole traumatic event? What were they like before? Did they always like fighting (I know you said somewhere that they were an anomaly in that they like violence as compared to the rest who are more peaceful) or did they have another hobby before then?

Basically, what was their life like before they were traumatized aka character developed? Feel free to answer in as much or as little detail as you like, since a) not sure if you've already have that thought of or not and b) because I don't know what you'd be alright with sharing and I want to be respectful in my studying of your characters under a microscope (and also just learning about your blorbos and world in general).

Again, hope you have a happy new year, continue doing what you're doing with writing and continue to improve (even though what you write is basically god tier already lol; also I mean that lol in a positive and good way not a mocking way to clarify, not at all being mocking | SWEAR), stay hydrated, take care of yourself and all that jazz :)

-Idk

(Also, ribbon anon, glad you don't find my walls of unhinged brain thoughts (well, I consider them somewhat unhinged in general lol) annoying and actually interesting (I have plenty more where they come from lol)!

Your ramblings/thoughts are also interesting (if you do them, and if you don’t, uh, I’m sure they’re still interesting. Not trying to be sarcastic, I genuinely just can’t remember sorry, I swear I’m not trying to be rude-)!

Also, again, your art is epic (just saw the comic stop, actually hecking phenomenal) and may you continue to improve; you're doing great but I can’t wait to see how you improve :D)

Great question!

Before Falkry had the war with humans and were driven off their island home and hunted to near-extinction, they were a very pasisve/relatively peaceful race. Physical fights/violence among Falkry are incredibly rare, partially because of the catastrophic consequences that could happen if a full-on fight breaks out (considering they have magic and are very powerful and fights could result in a lot of destruction) so adult Falkry tend to avoid conflict whenever possible. The most things ever escalate to is usually a heated argument or squabble. But there's a few hot-headed Falkry that are always looking for fights, but it's rare, unlike humans who are always looking for excuses to cause trouble.

Also, things like thieves and criminals aren't usually a thing on Falkradia because most Falkry get along fine, especially considering that they must work together to survive with hunting, foraging, etc. It's like one giant family -- the entire community is generally very close-knit. And everyone shares/trades valuables with each other, so it's a group effort to keep the peace and tranquility.

With that being said, Falkry still do enjoy fighting as a recreational sport -- mostly in the form of sparring competitions and fight training classes. It's a great way to connect with others and show off natural skills and agility. Most of the time these sports don't draw blood, and they also have hand-to-hand combat sessions which can cause some bruising but usually doesn't result in broken skin.

But there's also game called "Flinch" which is a bit riskier and is only for adult or teenage Falkry -- this is a dangerous pastime game that involves seeing who can toss throwing knives into the ground closest to their foot/shoe without flinching or cutting themselves. Kind of like the knife game humans play where they see how fast they can stab a knife between their fingers without cutting themselves. It's a similar concept. It's a demonstration of skill and talent to see who has the most accurate aim. With a Falkry's regenerative abilities, any damage obtained during the game will heal, so it's nothing too permanent (unless a toe is accidently severed -- Falkry can't grow back entire body parts.) But in the end, whoever flinches or cuts themselves is out.

Hope this answers your question! (And if not, feel free to send another ask Lol)

[the-firebird69]

Watch "Freya Ridings - Castles (Official Video)" on YouTube

I called her small ones once and I think she's correcting me but she has different characters and they're not exactly human cuz she's not exactly on the planet as people think but she looks just like Amanda gorenflo. And she of course would be her yes

Zues

It's not that complicated it's like RC. I was physically on Earth in Antarctica. For a long time. And I was born there. And I fled. Like he told me to. And I found bases and I'm staying there and people keep other people away there's a space battle and I'm okay but I'm calling him cuz he didn't ask sometimes it doesn't happen usually I call him a few times but he's doing other stuff and everybody's bothering him but he feels bad about it and I know he does but I'm okay and they're still fighting. Now I'm finally come to a conclusion about this in bed stuff and Dave Audette AKA JC. The same thing for her she made the same kind of thing it's the same hole and she did open it up and it's cut square now and people wondered why and thought it was Peter audette when it was her getting hers and the female venom. Both of them went there to that place and both of them were looked at and he put both in the case and it was JC and he came back and it was a different woman he hates her and she took both now both of those were taken by Peter audette and he's actually Tommy f and he's actually Joseph Stalin and he's above my husband and Southwest Florida in a 100 black ship and it is a dangerous machine people are now planning on infiltrating it's almost game set and match and they say it

Hera

Zues

We're getting ready to launch stuff to support the action here and to do things and we hear it and we're ready for it too this is an amazing song they represents her devotion to him and it makes him cry cuz he's happy and he knows what she's going through and it's suffering and she's beautiful and she looks at him and can feel him looking at her and good you see me and she says you made me feel so bad so you're broke up with me for real and I didn't know you were there so I didn't know I was supposed to care more and stuff like that. She says that's all you get wow. He really said oh cuz sometimes she makes you feel pain and there's that stuff in there and then stuff from the durock but that stuff's gone and this stuff will deteriorate in a few days finally and it is going to go pretty quick so few reasons mostly it's half life the other is he's hydrating more. And it didn't cause any damage and he's got a lot of empty cancer stuff one reason why he's doing it is because the durock and it didn't do it and speaking of which the castle she's going to help build and he will too is going to help save everyone and it's down there somewhere and then Hellboy they brought up part of The fortress in a tunnel and the supporting it and it's temporary and the two fell down and it was Trump and Tommy f and they landed in a moat and we're not killed and the piece of concrete started falling and they had to move but really someone's trying to make it look like they raised it that would be him and her and the castles are going to be put next to the others and someone's right again it's not the actual devil who's out yet and it's Hellboy and it takes the horns and the taxes them again but this time to his head because it's mutating and when he becomes legend he is switched out with the real thing and the girl can tell because of my character yes it's kind of like venom she says afterwards but very very scary and you don't want to bother them we weren't and we had a hard time and you said this is what it's like everyone's trying to tempt you and it's a terrible terrible thing and he knows about it and can't do anything so I feel bad for him in a way he's trapped with all this stuff and can't do stuff but then again he's creating things and it's really crushing everybody so he has to be stopped but he is and things are playing out and he's going after Max that's what it's mostly for and we know it so she says that but she's upset he says regrettably nobody ever survives an encounter with him so he's used for you but she never really does so you should be happy and amazed and she started to say this is a cheerful day you can charge like a billion dollars per seance. She started doing it right away and said the Trump was out and could see where he was and he was and things changed everybody started to listen to her and to talk to people it's coming up pretty soon because he's going to come out pretty soon

And Trump is going to do this stuff sooner they know where it is and they know where the tunnel is

There's a reason for that they want to see if there's evidence against my husband. And try and get us to fight max. And or use them as hostage. But really what's going to happen is they're going to go to extinction. Now everybody is after Carol a little bit and then after Tommy asked a lot more and the clothes and attacks of intensified over the past 15 minutes and the bases are under severe strike they're also going after the max they think they may have taken it from Tommy f they captured him several times and other people did too it's a real mess but they're isolated there and they're trying to gather all the power so it makes sense or you could have it or it could be trying to get it back but the maps are going after them but not really hard enough so people are checking it out

Hera

Zues

There's a period of time and people are trying to grab Tommy f and the max grabbed him a few times and disappeared and it's recorded and the McDonald's have it Biden will and Bill Stan and a lot of warlock have this recorded and they're going to have to go after him a lot harder

Thor Freya

Olympus

So he whistles the song and says you don't have to say he wants me to sit there and be beautiful I see how it is he's looking at Michelle and found that she was different when it's treating him different it was really weird but didn't want to do anything cuz of Dave and he thought that was strange too cuz they're saying it's she's a sister she's sitting there looking right where she's going to put the program I got to tell you what she was doing something evil right in front of him and he hates that

Hera

[1-1-s1ay-2-2]

I dont care

[davenweenie]

Lab Rats HCs!!!

-Chase has nicknames for all of his teammates as well as his siblings. He even had some for some of his students.

-he calls Bree ‘bee’ and it started when they were only just little kids and were called Subject A, B and C. B is bee to him. He also calls her breezy or speedy because that’s what Mr Davenport used to call her before they had names.

-really cliche but he calls Leo 'Lion' because he thinks it’s funny when Leo gets all flustered when he does it. Leo gets embarrassed because he knows he’s not really anything like a lion. He also calls him ‘butter fingers’ and ‘handy man’ and he thinks he’s funny with that one since Leo’s bionic in one arm.

-he calls Adam ‘Atom’ and I love this nickname for Adam. I think I saw it in a fic about how the kids got their names and it was because Mr Davenport called him atom bomb (I think, I might have just imagined it) in the fic. Chase pick up on stuff really easily, that includes nicknames for people. He also calls Adam ‘hulk’ which everyone loves.

-Kaz has many nicknames from Chase, his favourite one is ‘fire boy’ and this one’s actually canon. He also calls him ‘Azzy’ which I have definitely stolen from a Chaz fic. Chase also calls him ‘button’ and nobody is sure why it started.

-he calls Oliver ‘drink dispenser’ and ‘refrigerator’ which he thinks is absolutely hilarious. Everyone calls Oliver ‘Oli’ or ‘Oli-pop’ which Chase has picked up on. He also has take to calling him ‘liver’ which Oliver hates.

-Skylar’s nicknames are ‘E.T’ ‘alien’ and other alien references. Chase also started calling her ‘toes’ after he found out about her weird alien feet. He also makes a lot of Star Wars jokes around her.

-Mr Davenport is ‘Donnie Darko’ or ‘weird man’ which Chase has absolutely no idea why he started.

-Douglas is ‘trash man’ or ‘rat man’ which stems from him being previously homeless.

-Chase has emetophobia (phobia of vomit) and refuses to eat anything sugary after he had hurled after eating loads of cake when he wasn’t used to real food yet.

-Bree can somehow always whip out bars of chocolate or random packaged food whenever people need it. Like she always has food stashed away somewhere on her.

-Chase mothers People a lot. He’s the one that carries around plasters and hydration for people on outings, he for some reason always has a snack on hand like Bree does. His are usually healthy and nobody wants them though.

-Kaz and Oliver are the only ones on the team that know how to human properly. Skylar is an alien, Bree and Chase grew up in a basement so they struggle to function like normal humans in society. They don’t understand certain aspects of being people. They didn’t know what Easter was until Kaz and Oliver came along. They still didn’t understand what Santa was and what his purpose is supposed to be. They don’t understand things that are normally natural to do for humans. Chase couldn’t understand the concept of homophobia because it was so normalised in the basement.

- (TW for homophobia and hate crimes) Chase and Kaz were almost hate crimed coming home from a date once. Six guys had started following them and yelling at them. They (Kaz and Chase) didn’t say anything and carried on walking. One of them grabbed Chase and Kaz went ballistic. He got so mad that even his hair lit on fire.

-adding to that, Kaz’s hair can ignite like a match if he’s mad enough. So far he hasn’t figured out how to do it on command.

-they have meals together almost every night. Kaz almost always cooks and man can cook really good food. Having 11(?) siblings means he taught himself to cook so that he could feed his siblings when their parents couldn’t be bothered to.

And to finish off I want to say how happy I am to see all the likes and reblogs on my posts. A couple have had hashtags talking about how much they love these HCs and how they imagine the same things as me and it makes me so incredibly happy. Thanks to everyone who actually likes these!

[twistyprefect]

hi again hehe!! saw the opportunity to request and didn’t wanna pass it, can i maybe request a scenario of the octatrio discovering their fem s/o is a mermaid?? ^u^

{i love this request sooo much, mostly because of the implication that they can't recognize a mermaid on land??? very in character imo}

Azul Ashengrotto

Azul doesn't really pay much attention to his partner's looks or odd behavior, mostly chalking it up to nerves or just a habit she picked up somewhere

the fact she really really likes being fully hydrated is just her being a responsible person

he doesn't really figure it out, he finds out when the two of them go to the Coral Sea for a class and she suddenly has a tail and blueish-green skin

she laughs at his shocked expression and swims around him easily, not bothering to email how she managed to keep her human form

asks her to go to the sea with him on dates pretty frequently afterwards, now that he knows he doesn't have to worry about her breathing

Jade Leech

Jade is pretty observant, but even he kind of missed the signs that maybe his partner wasn't all human

not only did she drink a LOT of water constantly, but her skin had the distinctive sheen he'd come to associate with merpeople

still, he didn't really guess that she herself was a mermaid, even with all the signs

she confessed that she'd be hiding something from him, which initially made him panic a bit since generally she was a pretty honest person

the anxiety melted away when she jumped into the lounge's tank for merpeople and she sprouted a beautiful yellow, blue, and black stripped tail, her skin tinted yellow with stripes running along her back; Jade happily joined her, deciding maybe it was ok to keep this secret to himself

Floyd Leech

Floyd is observant like his brother, but unlike his brother he'll probably actually ask his partner about the oddities he noticed

one time he saw her drink three entire water bottles in a single class, which immediately set off alarm bells (who drinks that much water in one sitting??)

he confronts her about it eventually, bringing up her affinity for water, suspiciously shiny and smooth skin, her understanding and familiarity with the Coral Sea, etc.

she nervously confesses that she's a mermaid, offering to show him if he wanted

uses this as an excuse to get her to go on a date with him to the Coral Sea, where he gets to see her adorable clownfish-patterned mermaid tail (which he will inevitably tease her about)

[twisted-wonderland-shenanigans]

So something that just occurred to me with Jamil in the Monster!AU: I never truly clarified until my last post just what exactly he is 😂

I know, I know: Faun, you wrote that species list! How could you not have it clarified?

Now you see, my lovelies, here's the thing: it was meant to be a surprise discovery when it comes to Chapter 4, but I got so wrapped up in the wholesomeness that it never occurred to me to clarify what I had planned for him. I was going to reveal it when it came to the Bestiary pages, but Octavinelle is being stubborn with helping me write it so I can move on to the other dorms, so I feel I gotta clarify here. >.>

Hey, at least it means more worldbuilding!

Keep in mind that this was actually hinted at in the concept sketch I did of him here with the question marks right next to his species name (he's the only one I did this to), and I only clarified it now here in this post I did recently.

Jamil may say that he's a naga, but in truth he's actually a gorgon--a naga/gorgon hybrid if you will.

See, in the Monster!AU, there are subspecies and variations of every monster. Some are easier to tell right off bat just looking at them, but just like genetics in humans and animals, some traits can be more dominant on a cosmetic scale than others, effectively making it harder to tell on first glance or without a DNA test.

A little bit of info on the species right off the top of my head:

Naga tend to be water based creatures in Twisted Monsterland (a title that someone wrote in an ask that I absolutely adored, so I'm gonna start using it!), which means they're typically found near or in large bodies of water. In recent years though it has gotten much easier for them to travel around the world, though they can and do still require substantial hydration to maintain their strength. Their venom is incredibly potent, yet they rarely use it due to their peaceful nature except to hunt or defend themselves.

Gorgons, on the other hand, are entirely desert based monsters. Physically they resemble naga in that their upper torsos are humanoid and their lower bodies are serpentine. The major difference, however, is their scales. Naga have smooth scales to swim through water, whereas gorgons have "armored" scales with spines on it, giving them a more horned appearance. These scales are incredibly strong, making them powerful bodyguards and fighters. Their greatest strength, however, lies in their gaze, which is said to have mysterious abilities that affect all who gaze into them. Their bite, however, is not always venomous depending on the region they're from, meaning in ages past they've had very little to no need for potent venom for prey or enemies.

Now, if Jamil is meant to be a gorgon, then why did I draw him smooth scaled? Easy: because of his heritage. Somewhere along the line, there was a naga that married into the Viper family, and as a result of genetics he and Najma appeared more naga-like than gorgon. They both have harder scales than a normal naga, making piercing with a weapon or claws or fangs difficult. This makes it much easier for them to appear unassuming even as they serve the al Asim family. Unlike his sister though, Jamil has inherited the gorgon ability to affect his targets using his gaze.

Normally, the most common ability gorgons possess is the gaze that can turn their targets to stone or crystal (just as an example). An incredibly rare trait, however, is the ability to hypnotize others for any extended period of time. Given how strong it is in the game, you can imagine how powerful it is in Twisted Monsterland...and why he would keep it a secret from all but Kalim and his sister. After all, it's a major risk for him to have such an ability and to not be regarded with suspicion, so he keeps it hidden to the point that everyone believes that he really is a naga.

Side note, this also means that Najma has the most venomous bite in the family given that she inherited that trait from their ancestor 😂 Jamil's is effectively a watered down version of it to the point that it can only cause a tingling numbness that lasts for a while if he bites someone, and why he resorted to learning other methods of offense.

That's all I've got at the moment, so I hope you guys enjoyed my ramblings~ UvU

[space-dragon-ace]

The word with C

Pairing: PLATONIC!!! Albedo & Homunculus!Child!Reader Description: You are Albedo's creation, yet you have his DNA. Will he ever see you as his child? Word count: 1433 Additional info: This is not meant to be romantic, but purely platonic bonding. Tagging @clouds-rambles & @deadlyboyy

You happily smiled at Albedo, kicking your legs as he examined you. It was the second time this week he took your measurements, checked your height, your weight, and just about everything you had. You were his pride, his magnum opus, his creation. A homunculi, a creature that looked so human one could believe you were one. But that was the problem, you weren't. Albedo had created you in his lab, and he was not even completely sure how he did it! It had been an accident, Albedo had been experimenting with his own DNA, trying to find a way to give vision abilities to people who didn't held them. Then Klee had barged into the lab, and before either he or Sucrose could react, one of her bombs went off. When the dust had settled, Albedo wanted to see if he could save any of the data he gathered. Instead, he had seen you, a human looking baby, laying on the floor. In a span of just three days, you had matured into what resembled a ten-year old. All while barely needing any nutrients or hydration.

„That's it“, he said, writing down some notes „You can go now.“ You nodded and hopped down from the table. Carefully, you approached Albedo, trying to hug him, but he pushed you away. „I need to concentrate. Go play somewhere else or whatever.“ He waved his hand, dismissing you. Your smile turned into a frown, and you scuffled out of the laboratory, sulking a bit. Sucrose watched, biting her lip. „You shouldn't be so rude to them“, she said, „They are your child, after all. They want to be loved by you, and want your attention.“ He sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. Her words were true, he knew that, but yet... As much as he loved children, he could not see you as one. Could not see you as his child. He was not even human himself, so how could he be a father? What could it mean if his secret were to get out to the masses, how would they treat him? How would they treat you? He did not dare to think about the possibilities, each scenario his mind tried to come up with was worse than the last. Albedo had never been this afraid before.

Because once he would start seeing you as his child, he would love you. You would become his world, his light, the center of his universe. Like any good father, he would want to protect you from everything bad, would want you to be happy and safe, would worry and fear for you. You would be his greatest weakness, the one place to hit that would hurt more than anything else ever would. No, it was better to keep seeing you as a creature, as his creation. As long as he kept a distance, it would not hurt should anything happen to you. If it did, and you wouldn't be saved, you would just be another failed experiment. Something he tried once and then never again, and would forget soon enough. And for you, it was the best as well, Albedo was sure of it. He was an alchemist, and Dragonspine was his home. The cold, uncaring mountains were no place for a child. While he could withstand the cold just fine, he had learned very quickly that you couldn't, not at all. And you deserved to have friends, Klee already being all over you. So truly, what kind of father could he be to you, if he visited the city so rarely? He would either be never there, or keep you from all the things that made you happy. It was for the best to keep his distance.

A hand on his shoulder brought him back into reality. Sucrose looked at him, her eyes full of emotions he could not name. „Why don't you take a break for today and spent time with them?“, she suggested, a tiny smile on her lips. Albedo sighed again, shaking his head. „I can't. If I do, my creation will get used to my presence. I don't want that“, he said with a huff, focusing on his notes again. At least, he would, if Sucrose hadn't placed her hand on them. This time, he was met with daggers from her eyes when he looked up. „Do you not want them to get used to you? Or do you not want to get used to them? Who are you really thinking about here?“ Her voice was cold as ice and sharp as steel. Albedo groaned, pushing her hands from his notes. „This is not for you to care. Better watch over the experiments!“, he ordered her, staring her down. After a few more moments, she huffed, but turned away, allowing him to go back to his data.

---

The sun was setting already when he left the lab. The people in the streets walked quickly, scarfs and hats pulled deep into their faces. Winter was at the door, the temperatures already low. Not much longer and Mondstadt would be covered in snow, and the children would have snowball fights everywhere. He smiled at the idea of you being among them, happily laughing and having fun. A second later he shook his head. Keep distance, you were a creation, not a child. He could not let himself forget that. Klee ran up to him, a big smile on her face. „Good evening Mr. Albedo! Ready to go home?“, she asked, and giggled when he nodded. „I am. And you, Klee? On your way to keep Lady Jean on her toes or are you doing a slow evening?“ Klee giggled, rocking back and forth on her heels. „I'm doing nothing for the rest of the day. Did [Y/N] bring you flowers?“ Albedo blinked and tilted his head. Flowers? Why should you bring him flowers? „No, they didn't. Why would they?“ Now it was Klee's turn to blink, though it turned into a pout easily. „They said you were angry at them, and that they wanted to cheer you up. So I told them to bring you flowers. Kaeya always brings the women he likes flowers, and they get happy. And then [Y/N] ran off and said they'd bring you the most pretty flowers in Dragonspine.“ It took all but three seconds for the information to sink into Albedo's brain. You went to Dragonspine, alone, in this temperatures. You could be lost, you could be hurt, you could be dead. He was running before he knew it, the city flying past him. He needed to find you, and by Celestia, he needed you to be alive and well. His heart ached at the thought of not seeing you again, not being able to hear your voice again or never seeing you smile again. So much for keeping a distance.

He reached Dragonspine later than he wanted to, calling your name against the howling winds. With each passing second, your chances of survival were getting more slim, and the shiver he felt was not because of the cold. „[Y/N]!“, he called again, desperate for an answer. Tears burned in his eyes as he searched, your name echoing around every few seconds. Albedo prayed to Celestia for some kind of hint that would lead him to you, anything, he would take a miracle if he had to! „P-papa?“, a little voice called, and Albedo felt a boulder drop from his shoulders. He ran to the ledge the voice had come from, kneeling down and opening his arms. You stumbled out, your skin so cold and lips slightly blue. His heart clenched at the sight, and he pressed you as tight as he could against his body, hoping to warm you up a little bit. He thanked the Gods over and over on his way back to the city. You were alive, unharmed, and safe again. Safe in his arms, and he would not let you go. „'m sorry Papa, I couldn't find flowers for you. Please don't be mad“, you mumbled against his neck. Albedo inhaled shakily, hugging you closer. „It's okay, my dear. I'm not mad at you“, he promised. You sniffled a bit, your tiny hands clutching his shirt tighter. „It was so cold and dark. I was so scared“, you admitted, hoping he wouldn't think bad about you. But he merely kissed your temple and forehead, gentle and reassuring. „It's okay, you are safe now. Papa is here.“ You had been his creation. But now, Albedo could only see you as his child.

[moemammon]

hey !! I've recently discovered your writing and fallen in love !! everything you do is so amazing !!! I love it all!! could you write about how the boys would react to MC getting a little cold/stomach bug and needing to be taken care of ?? if this hits too close to home I'm sorry !! you def don't have to write it but I've always been a sucker for sicfic fluff !!

MC is Sick?! (Feat. The Demon Bros!)

(Tw for illness)

Lucifer

It was universally known that humans were fragile, and prone to illness. Some even died from simple colds. That being said, your little cold was still enough to bother the oldest brother. So much so that his work has been... of a lower quality than usual.

This dude is all disheveled and haggard because he's so worried over you, but that doesn't mean he's skimping on your care.

It's a surprise to everyone that he keeps you in his room, where he can monitor you and make sure you have everything you need. Might even cheat a little with magic from time to time, as long as it speeds up your recovery.

He's also making sure you're comfortable and at ease, often putting on a soothing record to lull you to sleep. In reality, he might also be using it to de-stress, too-

"To think you ended up like this while in my care... I should have paid closer attention to you. But now, you're my entire focus. Leave your recovery to me."

Mammon

You've been sneezing, coughing, and vomiting all over the place! This is some kinda human illness, right?? aRE YOU OKAY-

Proceeds to go OVERBOARD with the care. You're wrapped in twenty blankets, you've got an ice pack on your head and a thermometer in your mouth (the kind used in cooking because they don't own a normal thermometer), and he's gathered every medicine he could get his hands on

But once he calms down, he's actually pretty good at caring for you. Mammon isn't COMPLETELY useless when it comes to caregiving, so that's a plus. He's just especially worried because it's you.

Refuses to leave your side, and won't let you leave your room. If you need anything, he's just going to get it for you! He's also barring his brothers form entering, claiming that he's trying to keep them from getting sick.

"Who told ya to go out and get sick, huh?! Makin' me all worried and stuff... Guess I've got no choice but to take care of ya! I'm not leavin' your side, ya hear??"

Levi

Levi's literally been dreaming of a scenario where he’d be able to nurse you back to health. Uh, not that he wanted you to get sick, though!

He's always wanted to do the 'pressing your foreheads together to check your temp' thing.... And 100% own a nurse cosplay that he's tempted to wear

But it's a little hard for him to focus on his fantasies when you look so pitiful. He's got to make sure you're back to full health ASAP! There's a marathon you two need to binge, and he doesn't want you throwing up every five seconds!

He'll take you to his room, since he'll be able to take care of you 24/7. And tbh?? He actually does a decent job?? He's a little annoying about it because he keeps checking on you every three seconds and talking to you when you're trying to sleep, but he means well.

"If only the 'Kira Kira Curing Beam' was a real thing.... For now, I'll just do my best with what I've got! Ganbare, MC!! Faito! Faitoooo!!!!"

Satan

The first one to notice that you're getting sick, so he's on it 👌

Obviously he's read enough to know the basics of taking care of a sick human, and he can study anything else he doesn't know, so you're in good hands.

Also EXTREMELY worried. It's written all over his face, despite his attempts to keep it cool. He's read how humans can succumb to things like this....Actually, he just finished a novel where that was essentially the main plot-!

So gentle with you throughout the entire process. He makes sure to keep you warm, brings you all the essentials, makes sure you're hydrated, and keeps tabs on your medicine. He's got a schedule for your care and everything!

"Honestly, you should have told me sooner that you weren't feeling well. It's fine to come to me for things like that, you know? I'll always be happy to take care of you."

Asmo

Snot, phlegm, AND vomit??? Yeah,,,, that's a hard pass,,,,

It's taking every ounce of his mental strength not to abandon you in your time of need, but thankfully his love for you is greater than the disgust for now

But his dramatic ass is gonna come into your room in full hazmat when he takes care of you, no exceptions. Even if you ask him to bring you a glass of water, he's acting like you have the plague.

But he's also pretty good at taking care of you? Even demons get sick, and Asmo has a tendency to get pretty intimate with wide varieties of demons, so he's had his fair share of sick days.

"How am I supposed to hug and kiss you if you're so sick?? It's killing me, MC! Though, they say you can sweat an illness out of your body if you try hard enough. I think I know plenty of ways to work up a sweat~"

Beel

Now is no time to think about how hungry he is becaUSE HES WORRIED ABOUT YOU

Beel isn't the type to really know much about humans, other than stuff about their food and how weak they are, so he's pretty much assuming you're going to die.

Literally won't leave your side. If you need anything, he brings it. If you need to go somewhere, he's carrying you.

He doesn't know how to care for you, so he asks his brothers for all the help he can get. Though he insists on personally bringing you the remedies they give him.

"Hang in there, MC. You should eat more to build up your strength. I know you can't keep anything down, so I asked Satan to make something good. Here, it's soup. I'll blow it off for you, so open wide."

Belphie

Honestly, he thought you were just taking a REALLY long nap. You hadn't left your room at all, and you didn't even go to RAD. He was lowkey jealous that Lucifer didn't scold you until he realized it was because you were sick.

And very sick from the looks of it. There were tissues everywhere, your room was hot, and you looked like you'd been dropped in a lake, fished back out, then beaten up and thrown back in.

He couldn't even tease you when you were in such a pitiful state. Belphie had seen illness plenty of times, so this wasn't anything new. It didn't ease his worries, though.

So he keeps you company by curling up in bed with you, not caring if he's close enough that he might get sick. He's not the best at actually caring for you, because he tends to forget to bring you things or falls asleep on the way, so he leaves that to his brothers.

"You must be lonely, being holed up in your room all alone. It can't be helped, so I'll stay with you until you're feeling better. Just don't get your snot on me, okay? ....heheh, I'm just joking. Come here."

[its-not-a-phase-mom-i-d8-demons]

pairings: Lucifer x Fem!Reader, Mammon x Fem!Reader, Leviathan x Fem!Reader

warnings: tw abandonment (but it turns out okay, I promise), mentions of the act of birthing,

A/N: you came to the right place! as the second oldest of six children, I have some experience when it comes to pregnancy:) I hope you don't mind, nonny, but I'm gonna split this up into a few parts so I can do the dateables as well!

Lucifer

The moment you had shyly produced the positive pregnancy test from the pocket of your hoodie, it felt like Lucifer had entered into a fever dream filled with nursery designs, baby names, the expenses that pile up before the baby even arrives, researching human pregnancy, keeping you out of harm's way and healthy and happy...

So when you first stagger out of bed and rush to his bathroom, hand clamped over your mouth and one shaky hand on your slightly swollen tummy, Lucifer isn't surprised

He is very concerned, however. You had been so nervous to tell him of your pregnancy, you waited until the last moment before your bump was noticeable to tell him

That meant you had been suffering from all of these pregnancy side effects before he'd permanently moved you to sleep in his room

Lucifer hoists himself out of bed and pads into the bathroom, gathering up your hair, if any, into his fist and pulling your hunched form between his legs for support

You hate this feeling with a passion; throbbing stomach and a lump in your throat with little to no vertigo and tears rolling down your face as you try and catch your breath

You tell him it hurts, you ask him if he can take the pain away as your head rests on his chest, lashes fluttering with wooziness

Lightheadedness was unbearably common; you would suddenly grip his sleeve and he could watch the color drain from your face and your knees get shaky, body beginning to sway

He always catches you though, finding a place for you to sit or lie down and gather yourself

Tummy rubs become more common; the feeling of his hands against your bare tummy, spreading their warmth and nullifying the ache, allowing you to relax

He's extremely attentive as well and can tell whenever you need something

Water? Here's a cup sweetheart, remember, you're hydrating and eating for two people!

Craving something? Chocolate? Fried pickles? Chips of some kind? sweets? He's stockpiled anything you could want and locked it away just for you.

I feel like Lucifer would want your baby to be a little girl. A little princess he can carry on his shoulders and spoil with his love and gifts.

Satan ruined him for having another baby boy, but if that's how the cards fall, he certainly wouldn't mind. Unfortunately, he'd be constantly walking on eggshells, afraid he'll make your little boy into another rebellious child

That's the last thing he wants

Lucifer does his best to keep his kid away from Satan and Belphie and out of the 'Formerly Anti-Lucifer League', but sometimes you're taking a nap or out shopping with Asmodeus, and Satan and his brothers manage to coerce the little one into their shenanigans

One thing is for sure though, even if Lucifer didn't want any kids and the creation of one was unplanned, he would never ever turn you away

He's very responsible and does anything in his power to make the pregnancy as easy and happy as possible

On the day you are to give birth, he's a mess

He has already sweat through 3 shirts by the time the IV has been secured to your hand

Everything he says doesn't come without a stutter

He's squeezing your hand and kissing your hair during labor, trying to distract you from the burn between your legs as much as he can

You probably need extra stitches from baby's horns ngl

Definitely cries before the baby is even put in your arms

Refuses to let his brothers come and see you, "They can wait until we go home."

Lucifer is Smitten™

He smooches the tiredness under your eyes and tells you to get some rest

Surprisingly, he enjoys a lot of the names from the human world you discuss and will most likely pick one of those

But if it's a girl, her name is Lilith. I'm sorry MC, your input is invalid at this time

You don't regret 'final day in the devildom sex' at all when you get to witness the Avatar of Pride reduced to tears when the nurse puts the child in his arms

P-P-Pregnant? MC, ya better be jokin'...

Mammon

You weren't, judging by the pregnancy test(s) clutched in your fist

He's not mad at you, he's not upset, (in fact, he's the happiest he's ever been), he just scared

Broken Condom Victim™

He loved you just a bit too hard last week...

but let's be real here, HIS MC, carrying HIS baby?

That's like the highest level of ownership on his lovely human you could get! Levi, Asmo, Beel, Lucifer, everyone would be SOOOO JEALOUS!!!

AND

He gets to have a little one running around again!

You saw how sweet he was to babified Satan in the obey me anime premier! He LOVES little kids and nothing would make him happier than someone to play with (besides MC of course) that wouldn't make fun of him for messing up and being silly!

AND

You're so pretty!!

I mean, ya were always pretty, but somethin' about ya is different and yer even more beautiful than before somehow!

Mammon said, his entire face the shade of a pomegranate

Pregnancy glow is REAL

Asmo agrees, after stealing you away from an extremely overprotective mammon and hiding in the attic to chat without disturbance (mammon)

But as much as YOU know he would be the BEST father, comments from his brothers continue to drag him down and the evenings he cried into your shoulder became more and more frequent as your pregnancy progresses

Mammon, as we all know, is, in fact, a tiddy man

He likes to touch and squeeze them, and just gently hold them while cuddling or even browsing in a store, he'd just come up behind you and touch your boobs

(also, mammon likes all sizes, so if you have next to no tiddy like me, you'll be at his mercy as well. those with the large honkers, however, watch yourself)

Now that there's a miracle growing in your tummy, other parts of your body are preparing for its arrival, including your chest

Swelling, swelling, soreness, growing and darkening of the nipples, and swelling make it so Mammon can no longer touch your pretty tiddies :(((

(grammarly didn't like that word)

On the day mammon snack size was to be born, mammon is silent but extremely fidgety

It was early in the morning when you'd shaken him awake like, "mammoney, I'm going into labor" and he was out of bed and out the door with your luggage before you finished blinking

After grabbing your DDD's and you, he carries you down to the car (what dysfunctional family doesn't have a car? a nice one (Mercedes, Audi, you get the idea) for lucifer and a Volkswagon bus or something for his siblings to share) and drives quickly, but very carefully drives to the hospital, holding your hand the whole way.

He covers your eyes when they put the IV in, just in case you're squeamish, and rubs your arms as the drugs begin to take effect and there's a little fear in your eyes at the thought of pushing an entire human/demon being out of your coochie

He assures you and never lets go of your hand no matter how long you're in labor

When it's all over with and you are resting in your hospital bed waiting for the doctors to finish the Apgar tests and give you your baby

Mammon is speechless as the nurse places the baby in your arms

That's HIS KID!!

Immediately starts crying

The little horns poking out of the blanket? Those look just like his!!

Judging by the bit of hair on it's head, it looks like the baby will have hair like yours

If it's a baby boy, he thinks it should be named "Mammon II" but you just giggle and remind him of the deal he made with lucifer long ago, that his first born child, no matter the gender, had to have 'Lucifer' somewhere in their name

Human names are dumb, except for yours of course, so he searches for suitable demon names

The last thing he wants is a kid named Lucifer, so that will be the kid's middle name

He really regrets his past decisions now

Leviathan

"Levi?"

"Yeah, babe?"

"I'm pregnant."

*leviathan has been KO'd*

No joke, this man is literally floored and didn't wake up for a while and you were afraid you had just slain the fucking Lord of Shadows

Some Henry you were

You had to call Lucifer in to wake him up because he was still flat on the floor a half and hour later

Mammon is more that happy to tip a bucket of ice water on the face of the son of a bitch that impregnated HIS MC

Levi wakes up and pounces on you, gripping you tightly by the arms

"You're k-kidding r-right?"

Him? A father?

Uhhhhhhh

Unfortunately, Leviathan.exe has stopped working, try again in two thousand years

I hate to say this, but he definitely detaches himself for a while until his brothers, especially Asmodeus, literally beat him into shape

He comes back to you, a little bruised and sobbing, but not from the beating he just received

He's so sorry he neglected you! He's such a horrible demon, undeserving of your welcoming nature

He's gonna be the worst dad, and he's not good enough for you, and his kid will hate him just like everyone else does, he doesn't deserve you, he's so sorry for making you suffer the side effects and feel all alone,

Sir, I-

FALSE

It's your turn to shake some sense into him, reminding him that he would be the. best. dad!!

Not to mention the fact that you were just happy he realized his mistakes and came back to you

He begs you to sleep in his bed tub with him for security, and you have to admit his tail is very comforting

Levi does extensive research on human pregnancy and now at the dinner table, instead of talking about the latest slice of life anime he'd been watching, he's just spouting random pregnancy facts and you're laughing so hard it brings you to tears

When the weird dreams and vivid nightmares happen, Levi is right behind you, rubbing your swollen tummy, and letting you talk about them

A lot of them were about him and about your future child

Most of them were about how they got hurt in some way, either that or YOU got hurt and the baby died

These, more often than not, brought you to tears and stress you out, but Levi is right there, okay? Nothing can hurt you, nor would he let anything happen to you on his watch

Learns how to massage you (safely) to reduce stress

Definitely talks to the baby a lot

Levi begged you to be induced so the birth was safe and not a sudden occasion and you agree

On the day the doctor recommended, you arrived at the hospital and got down to business

Levi didn't really want to be in the room with you, but he knew he had to for your sake and he'd played a few birth simulators from both perspectives and you really needed him

Kinda sits there awkwardly comforting you and encouraging you, holding your hand and caressing your cheeks, a bit flushed from exertion and tears

Listen

If the baby is a boy, his name will be Henry and that's final

If it's a girl, he doesn't really care, as long as you don't name her 'mammonia' or something dumb like that

definitely crashes your hospital bed to snuggle until the baby is ready

cries when the baby wraps its extremely small digits around one of his own

also at the little horns protruding from its head

and the tuft of purple in its head

Also Smitten™

He's so excited to get home and show off his beautiful baby to his brothers and then formulate a plan to raise the kid to live and breathe TSL just like his daddy <3

--

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