#because ariana is so bloody cool in that game

[lollitree]

I need to talk about Celosia more. Look at her. 0 confidence. She's such a mood. In a position of power in a villainous team and looks like this when facing a child. Was trying to intimidate the president of a company into complying right before this as well

[inspirationdivine]

Curtain Call || Lydia, Orion, Winston, Luce, Athena

Timing: Current Parties: @inspirationdivine @3starsquinn @danetobelieve @divineluce @athenaquinn Summary: After being forced to leave town by Kaden, Lydia prepares for her next steps. Others have different ideas.  Warnings: Drug manipulation (leanan sidhe kiss), references to abuse, gore tw, minor vomit tw (mentions)

Now that her arm was healing and her wing was taped together, walking was almost bearable. Lydia was also running high on painkillers, so her entire body felt like it was wrapped in cotton gauze, numb to both the outside world and the inside one. Her phone buzzed in her pocket, and with a wince, she pulled it out. It was Deirdre, calling again. It was practically muscle memory at this point to tap decline and put it away again, as it had been for the dozens of calls she’d gotten from the Banshee. It must have been the mushrooms or something. Deirdre was ever so susceptible to them. Lydia pursed her lips, before looking at Rio. “I can’t stress enough how grateful I am for all of your help. My, uh, my friend will be here in an hour. You don’t mind waiting that little bit longer, do you?” She looked around at the crowded evening streets from the passenger side of her car. “You probably need to eat, right?” She asked him. 

 Orion knew nothing about this friend of Lydia’s, but figured that waiting around until they got here wouldn’t kill him. For now, Rio was pretty sure that Lydia was safe from the hunter at least. That wouldn’t stop them from coming after her again, but Lydia must have felt safe with the friend who should be coming to get her or she wouldn’t have reached out to them in the first place. Rio wasn’t sure how long it had been since Lydia had first contacted him but he knew that he hadn’t gotten any sleep. He had pulled enough all nighters in the Scribrary to know how to function with little to no sleep, but that didn’t stop his stomach from growling. “It’s fine. I’m happy to stick around.” Rio smiled at the woman and leaned his head against the car window. “It’s not a big deal, I’m not that hungry. I can wait.” He was lying obviously, his stomach growling enough proof of that. But right now his only concern was making sure that she got away from here safely. He could worry about eating later.

 Winston had not been having a good time since dealing with Bloody Mary and the Sandman; Orion had gone missing and it had been a rough ride to track him down (which Winston wouldn’t normally do with their boyfriend because CREEPY but these were unprecedented times). To make matters worse Todd had fallen off the surface of the Earth. He’d cut Winston off. Winston wasn’t sure what they had done to receive this sort of treatment, but there it was. It had been hard. Picking between going after Todd and going after Rio, but Winston hadn’t really had to think that much about the choice, it had sort of come naturally and Winston was sure that they had made the right call. They were weighed down with all manner of magical gadgetry as they followed the blinking light on their screen. “I don’t think they’re too far from here,” they whispered as they crept forward, knowing that Rio couldn’t be that much further away. Thank God for technomancy. 

 Of all the people Luce had expected to go up against Lydia with, Athena and Winston were pretty far at the bottom of her list. In fact, they were probably at the bottom. But, when she’d gotten the message from Athena, telling her about the situation, Luce had been only too willing to help. Help. That was… one way of describing what she was hoping to do. Murder, that was another word for it. A more accurate one. Fingers curling around the iron spear that she’d brought with her, Luce followed closely behind Winston. Who would have thought the neighbor kid would be leading the charge to fuck up a lady. “Mhm.” Luce nodded, the familiar grip of Lydia’s magic creeping up on her as she tried to figure out how to word things. She knew about Lydia, knew about her home and what she could do to people. But when Athena had told her about the situation, it had circumvented the fae magic that bound her to her promise. If the others already knew about Lydia , then it didn’t matter. “What’s our game plan, once we get there? I’ve got this,” She held the spear up, “But I can’t exactly just light up a bitch without there being some fall out.”

 She knew this had to be done. Whatever came of all of it, Lydia couldn’t go on living. Not because of who she was, not because of what she’d done to Ariana and now, according to Winston, possibly to her brother. Athena couldn’t help but let the iron in her blood concentrate periodically to her fingertips, her lips in a firm line. She had a couple more knives on her body than usual, because whatever was going to happen, she couldn’t leave room for anything to go wrong. She was glad that she’d asked Luce to come along - working to take down that Cù-sìth those months ago had solidified Athena’s already present respect for the woman. “I think we should avoid the fire for now - we don’t want to draw attention to ourselves. She’s lived a super-duper fucking long time,” she knew her words were biting and she didn’t care, “and that means she’s got to have ways of getting out of tricky situations. So I say we go in there, make sure my brother - make sure Ri’s all safe, and kill her. Plain and simple.” Even though she had to admit to herself that it was anything but.

 “If you’re sure,” Lydia said softly. He was perfectly tolerable as far as humans went, and she’d rather keep the promises in her back pocket and keep her slate as clean as she could, at least in the eyes of those she still loved back in White Crest. She shifted, looking over the bandage on her arm to see if it needed changing. Nothing. When Lydia looked out the window, surveying the people on the road, she spotted someone she couldn’t believe was here. Lucinda Vural. Lydia looked out the right side of her window, clucking her tongue in frustration at the sight of traffic all around them. There was no easy way to drive out of here. The last thing she wanted was for Luce to find her smeared in her own blood and weak, for another way to be hurt by the Vurals. Being in a car in the vicinity of a fire spellcaster also frightened her. “We should go for a walk. Quickly, Rio. I’m so sorry.”

 “A walk? What about your friend?” Orion found himself asking, but that didn’t seem to bother Lydia much. She was already climbing out of the car in a hurry. Rio only let himself rest for another second, letting out a held breath and staring up at the roof of the car before following her out of the car. She seemed shaken. Was the hunter back around? Was that what she had been freaking out about? Immediately, Rio began looking around the place, spotting a familiar face from a block or two over. “Luce?” Rio asked aloud, glancing over at Lydia. Could that be who she had spotted? Luce was scary but she wasn’t exactly a hunter. “Last time I saw her she punched me in the face.” Rio touched at the spot on his face on reflex, a ghost pain reminding him of how strong one of her punches could be when she was mad. But the memories dissipated quickly when the traffic broke, revealing two more faces with Luce that had previously been blocked by a car. “What the-” Rio froze in place, no longer walking alongside Lydia but instead trying to figure out why Winston and Athena were together. And here of all places. “I know them.” Rio was ready to wave before he hesitated. Lydia was a fae, and whatever trauma Athena was going through at the moment, she was a warden. She hadn’t been the hunter that had attacked Lydia, but she might be just as dangerous. “What is going on?” He turned on Lydia.

 Luce wasn’t alone. That was worse, somehow. Perhaps her and Winston were on an out of town shopping trip for some reason, with the blonde girl Lydia didn’t recognise, but this was the wrong area to go for extended shop options. “I don’t know. Really, Rio, I have no idea why they’re here, but I don’t want to wait to find out if it’s a coincidence.” Lydia replied in hushed tones, already anxiously moving. “Let’s go.” She had no idea why any of them were here, but Lydia had seen at least a few times the kind of power Winston held. She also knew she had talked Todd through leaving Winston, although nothing should have connected her to that from their perspective. 

 She was seething. She could see her brother and she saw him look over. Athena had half a mind to run over right then, but she knew that she had to be careful. If not for her own life, for the lives of Luce, Winston, and her brother. She couldn’t let them die. Her skin was crawling and she wanted nothing more than to be away from Lydia, but she had to remind herself that she would be soon. “I - I don’t know why my brother - why he’s not…” Why he’s not coming over here. Though he sometimes had things planned far in advance but there was something about the whole situation that didn’t sit quite right with her, though the idea of her brother being around a murderous fae in the first place was more than enough to set her off. “We’ve got to act soon, but we also have to make sure she doesn’t hurt my brother - hurt Ri - in retaliation.” Her fingers found one of the knives pressed flush against her hip, letting the cool iron of it match the concentrated iron under her skin. “I think your spear will come in handy,” she whispered to Luce. “I don’t really care, as long as she suffers.”

 Swallowing, Winston did their best to take in the entire situation. They knew that this was complex but right now the only priority that there was was to get Orion out of here without getting him hurt. Something that was easier said than done. “I’m sorry but I don’t really care about hurting Lydia, all I care is about getting Rio out of this. I don’t know why he’s playing along but…” Winston wasn’t sure that they really cared enough to explain their thought process. Tracking Rio had not been so difficult but the question of why he was willingly assisting Lydia remained. It was a promise bind situation was all that Winston could think. “I will concentrate on making sure Rio doesn’t get hurt,” Winston had designed tech specifically for a situation like this but like most of the tech that they came up with it hadn’t exactly been field tested until now, “but the faster we can do this… well the better.”

 Wait, Rio was Athena’s brother? What fucking apples and what fucking trees... Luce shook her head-- now wasn’t the time to think about that. The two of them clearly had higher stakes in this than her. Athena and Winston wanted to make sure Rio was safe. Which was fair. But, that didn’t help the fact that he was definitely with Lydia. Letting out a sigh, Luce glanced around the busy roads. There was a lot of fucking traffic, a lot more innocent people than she could reasonably risk with her flames. Fire had a way of getting out of hand and this wasn’t the place for it right now. “Listen, the longer we stand here, the worse this is going to go. That bitch,” Luce growled, “Will do whatever it takes to get away. You two, find a way to cut her off, stop her from getting away. Try to get Rio away from her.” She said and shook her head, thinking of the way August had bent to her will. If he’d been kissed by her, Luce had no idea if it’d even be possible to get Rio back. “In the meantime,” Gripping the spear tightly in her hand, Luce watched for traffic and began to cross the road. The iron in her hands heated under her skin, her blood boiling. “Hey, Lydia. Long time no see.”

 “Does Luce have a spear?” Orion asked incredulously, eyes growing wide as he remembered the damage she had done without any weapon at all the last time the two had run into each other. They did need to go, but Rio didn’t exactly want to. Something was happening. Rio found himself glancing back and forth between the three and Lydia. Something wasn’t adding up, but Rio knew enough about Athena and Luce to know that violence was definitely on their minds. Lydia was too injured to get away from any of them right now, especially a hunter. Counting on that, Rio slid in front of Lydia, blocking Luce’s path to her as she crossed the street. “Oh uh. Hey guys. What’s up?” He tried smiling, giving a small wave before tucking his hand behind his head and scratching at his neck nervously. He was so confused. He glanced at the three, eyes finally landing on Winston and staying there, the smile disappearing from his face as their eyes locked and Rio tried to figure out why they were here with the other two. “Funny running into you here, yeah?”

 Lydia’s gaze flicked around, eyes narrowing. There was a tall department store not thirty feet away, with a flat roof, which meant there was likely rooftop access. Three blocks away, there was a safe loft where she could wait out her connection. Just fifty more minutes. Lucinda walked up close as Lydia took a nervous step back. Fucking Vurals. “That’s an iron spear,” she pointed out, her hand trembling. Rio knew these people. Shit. Maybe they really were here for Rio. But the steely stare of Lucinda told her that Rio was not the main concern. Lydia stood a little taller, her whole body aching. Her thigh buzzed again. “Did I not pay you enough for your magic, Winston? Did I not look after your human sacrifice well enough, Lucinda? I don’t even know who you are, another spellcaster, no doubt. If this is what Kaden Langley’s grace looks like, it’s not very impressive.” Lydia’s voice wobbled with nerves, even as her tone chilled like ice. “You would protect me, no matter what, wouldn’t you, Rio? You promised. I wish I didn’t have to do this, but they’re here to hurt me.” 

 “She’s hurt him and my-” Ariana. “Another good friend. She needs to suffer.” Athena nodded. “You can concentrate to make sure he doesn’t get hurt. He can’t.” I can’t live with myself if he did. I knew he was going to get in trouble with a fae one day. She couldn’t blame him though, not when there was a potential that he might not make it out of this alive. “We’ll make this efficient. That, among many other things, is something I can excel at.” She nodded at Luce and followed her across the road, hoping that the traffic would dissipate soon enough. She didn’t need innocent lives being lost, at least not as much as she could avoid. “Not so funny.” Athena’s eyes narrowed in response to her brother. “You -” her eyes widened, praying for him to somehow hear her thoughts. Not that such a thing was possible, but when they’d been children it had almost felt like it was. She hardened her gaze as it shifted over to where Lydia sat, her skin crawling. Not a spellcaster, she wanted to say. Wanted to hiss, even. She had no issues with spellcasters, but she was not one. Not at all. “Doesn’t matter who I am. I know enough about who you are.” Kaden has nothing to do with this. At least not the most significant part. As she turned to watch the exchange between her brother and Lydia, she couldn’t help but reach for her dagger again, though she didn’t remove it. You promised. “You didn’t.” Turning to look directly at her brother, Athena shook her head, doing her best to keep her breathing even. No. 

 That confirmed it. Promise bound. Great. Rio was too good for this world truly. Of course he was going to make a promise that he would be forced to keep. “Lydia, you definitely pay very well, I would’ve loved to have just worked for you, but you took Todd and now you’ve taken someone even more important and wrapped him up in a promise that he shouldn’t have to keep. I’m not going to make him break it, because that will hurt him more than I can allow, but I won’t let you keep doing this.” Winston fished into their pocket, pulling a number of tiny metal balls of twine from their pocket before tossing them through the air. The balls of twine sprouted tiny wire legs and began to scuttle towards Rio. They were made from iron. Everything had a hint of iron nowadays. Better for dealing with fae. “I’m really sorry Rio,” Winston watched as the wires of the twine reached out and began to wrap themselves around Rio’s feet. Hopefully this didn’t hurt them too much. Winston wasn’t sure if them preventing Rio from completing the promise would hurt Rio as well, they hoped not. But right now they had to deal with Lydia. She couldn’t go on. 

 When Rio stepped into her path, Luce had the uncomfortable flashback to the last time they’d run into each other. She’d been wrong then, yeah. And, as she heard Athena and Winston talk, as they pieced together the puzzle that she really didn’t care about, she had a feeling that she was going to be in the wrong again. But, it didn’t matter. Rio wouldn’t be hurt. Not in any real way compared to what she was going to do to Lydia. As Winston apologized, as they let loose their latest techno-magical marvel, she watched the way it curled around his legs. Probably not enough to stop him, but if she gave him a little help...  Luce curled her free hand into a fist. “Sorry, Rio.” She said apologetically and punched the kid square in the face once more before quickly sidestepping him to face Lydia. Holding the short spear out to block the woman’s path, she offered a tight lipped smile. “I’d say you did your job too well, Lydia.” She said as she pressed forward. It was too open here, too many eyes. If they could just get away from the street. “Why don’t we have a nice little chat about just how good you are at what you do, huh?” Luce said, the threat of violence mounting with every step she took towards the Fae woman.

 Everything happened quickly. Orion’s first instinct was to deny Lydia’s claims. He wouldn’t have promised her anything. “No- That can’t be… I didn’t-” But he kept trailing off. Back then, he hadn’t known she was a fae. She was a woman attacked by a monster in town and Rio was a hunter that had helped her. He had promised not to harm her. To protect her even. “Oh my god.” He had been so stupid. And now, everything made sense. Athena was helping Ariana look for the Fae that had killed her friend. Turned out, Rio had known her all along. His voice caught in his throat. He wanted to yell at Lydia, or to yell at the group but what was the point? This was all his fault. He had saved a monster, and now he had been trapped in her net. “Please don’t make me do that.” Rio finally spoke, begging Lydia to let him free. To stop him. The group caught on quickly, wires wrapping around Rio’s leg in an attempt by Winston to lock him into place, and seconds later another punch to the face by Luce threw him off balance. At least she apologized this time around. But as much as Rio wanted to fight against it and stay rooted in place, he felt his body moving on it’s own. “Crap. No, no, no.” He said to himself as he grabbed at the wires and began ripping them away from his legs. Don’t do this. He kept telling himself, forcing himself to stop. But he had promise bound himself to a freaking fae. “Stop me!” He yelled at the group. But he had already ripped most of the wires free and was reaching towards Luce to stop her from hurting Lydia. 

 If the blonde girl was going to act vague and detached, Lydia was going to dismiss her as entirely uninteresting. Luce and Winston were the clear threats here. “T-” Lydia frowned. They oughtn’t have been able to know about that. The detachment had been seamless, Todd’s last close connections hurt but not suspicious. In a year, no one would be able to find a single reference to DJ Dayze, but the transition had only barely started. No matter now, Todd would rot in that home of hers until she sent someone to pull him out, but she tucked that thought away. Apparently this human hunter was even more valuable than Todd. A bargaining chip. Lydia jumped back as Winston threw their gizmos on the floor, but the twine only went for Rio, not for her. Lydia’s mouth filled with saliva as her heart began to race, adrenaline numbing the searing pain in her back and arms. Luce aimed the spear she had once stolen from a red cap at Lydia, and Lydia swallowed. “I don’t want to make him fight you. If you all backed off, he would be home in a couple hours and no one would have any more issues. But that isn’t going to happen, is it?” The blonde girl’s hand twitched to something at her side, so Lydia’s did the same, slowly backing away from Lucinda’s spear. At the same moment that Rio stopped to reach for it, Lydia grabbed her own dagger and pushed it into his hand. “Your choice. Have fun.” Lydia spun and spat on a passer by, yelling for him to protect her too. She bolted down the street, licking her hand and spreading her toxin onto every human she could touch, leaving a wall of human shields in her wake. The department store would let her disappear, if she could reach it. Lydia’s phone buzzed again, as Lydia screeched in frustration. Surely Deirdre knew she would be busy?

 The fae was hardly paying attention to her, but that suited Athena just fine. She relished when those who she hunted underestimated her. It just made their deaths all the more pleasurable in the end. She knew that she couldn’t let her guard down, not even for a moment. She winced briefly at Winston and Luce’s actions, but she felt her whole body tense up at her brother’s pleading. There was no work-around right now - who knew what sort of promises he’d been exactly manipulated into, and she couldn’t risk any further harm coming to him. She couldn’t lose him. Wouldn’t lose him. Except Lydia wasn’t going to go down easy. “I do not believe you.” She replied, simply, gaze focused. Focused on Lydia before it moved to her brother, and the dagger than Lydia had placed in his hand. “Ri, no.” She hissed, as Lydia spat on someone else and began to run away. “I - we can’t let her get away.” Athena began to move in the direction where Lydia had gone - dagger now removed and clearly visible. “We also can’t - the humans need to get out of this as unharmed as possible.” She moved toward her brother for just a moment, wondering if there was a way to get the dagger out of his hands. If she could be quick and swift enough to do so. She knew how he moved, usually.  

 Winston had seen this fae affect so many people. She had killed Ariana’s friend. She had taken Todd. She was doing all of this to Rio and now she was bringing in people who had absolutely nothing to do with it and bringing them into it all. Winston swallowed before watching Rio tear through the wire that was wrapping up his body. They really hadn’t wanted to hurt their but there wasn’t really much choice here. Willing the wires to unravel and then tighten around him, Winston fought back against Rio’s frankly incredible strength. Something that Winston would’ve normally marvelled at. Hurling more balls of twine his way, they watched as Lydia tried to make her exit. Reaching out with their mind Winston tried to sense the wires that would inevitably run through all of the streets and lanes. Unfortunately this wasn’t as densely populated an area as they would’ve normally liked and therefore there was not as much around them that they would be able to use. But they would make do. “I can only do so much with these balls of twine but I’ll try and stop Lydia from getting too far.” Winston watched as she darted through the crowd, there was a telephone line hanging overhead and Winston snapped the wire with their mind, causing the copper wire to lash downwards and wrap around Lydia’s leg. “Get the dagger off of Rio and we can deal with him once Lydia’s dealt with…” Winston was concerned however, they didn’t really want to substantially hurt their boyfriend but they were beginning to wonder if they didn’t have much other choice.

 In an instant, the tension that had existed between them had exploded into motion, with action and reaction. Rio was tearing at the wires, now armed, Athena grasping the dagger, Lydia taking off through the crowd, setting up a wall of human shields between her and them. Luce gritted her teeth as one of the entranced bystanders positioned himself firmly between her and Lydia, his hands raising to block her. Hand to hand wasn’t her best skill, and neither was taking down people in a way that wouldn’t hurt them badly. Anger burning under her skin, Luce tried to focus on the sensation she’d had that night, when she’d willed the magic to crackle and explode into something more than just flame. Lightning, electricity, sharp and precise and deadly. She wanted it, needed it now more than ever.  But, when she brought her hands up, outstretched and reaching for Lydia, a burst of blue flames were conjured instead. The flames caught on the clothes of the people around her, not caring who or what they consumed. And neither did the bystanders between them. They continued to block her path, even as the fire crawled along their bodies. “Fuck.” She swore before focusing her magic, pouring energy into killing the flames, smothering them. “Shit, shit, shit!” She swore. 

 Through her perforated ear, Lydia did not hear the overhead cable snap until it cracked around her ankle. Lydia toppled, screaming like she was being burned again as she caught her weight with just one arm. Unsuspecting humans moved close to help her out of misguided kindness, but the cable had split her skin where it had lashed her first and they were hesitant to reach out. Frightened of an electric shock. Lydia grabbed one passerby, smearing her spit on him until it numbed his fear. “Get it off me!” She shrieked. His hands frantically scrabbled at the cable, as she grabbed three others, including a teenager, to pry the cable off her leg. Winston wanted her dead, but they wouldn’t electrocute her with humans at stake, right? Lydia looked up as a couple humans screamed, staring in wide eyed horror at the fire melting clothes in the crowd. They didn’t falter as their skin burned, even if they yelled in pain. That was the point of the kiss, after all, that they would set themselves on fire to keep Lydia safe. The entrancing sight was extinguished just as quickly, and the copper wire was pried from her legs. “Help me up,” she snarled, and two arms picked her up from the waist. Dizzy with the ache of a dozen injuries, Lydia forced herself to turn on her heel and run again, pushing people out of the way as she went. 

 Orion didn’t want the knife that Lydia passed off to him, but he couldn’t seem to let it go. He had to protect Lydia. Even if his brain was telling him to stop, he had to protect her. His family had been warning him their entire lives not to fall into the trap, but here he was. As his grip tightened on the knife, Rio found himself gritting his teeth. It seemed like the only physical thing he could do to restrain himself. His muscles ached as he was forced to move forward despite trying so desperately to hold himself back. He could see the three around them, Luce moving towards Lydia, Winston trying to work their magic and Athena ready to pounce at Rio at any moment. All his mind could think about was how to stop all three of them from getting to Lydia. Luce and Winston both had dangerous magic and Athena had always been stronger than Rio had. It seemed like more of a losing battle, and while that’s exactly in actuality, the reality was that he had no choice but to try. He needed to stop Luce, she was closest. But before he could move, Athena leapt at him. He had grown up fighting her his entire life, but had never once won a battle. He had never wanted to fight her, but they had known all the same moves. They had grown up memorizing each other’s moves. But Rio was different than he had been before. He had been learning moves from someone else now. He slid past her arm, grabbing onto her wrist and twisting it behind her, finally pulling her entire arm behind her back in order to pin her. With his free hand he held the knife up, begging himself internally not to use it. He was forced to protect Lydia, but that didn’t mean he’d have to kill anyone. He just needed to fulfill his promise. If he slowed them down, that was protecting her. “I’m sorry.” Rio muttered, voice shaking in anticipation, “Oh god, I’m so sorry.” He tried to drive the point home before he braced his free hand on the other side of her arm and snapped them against each other, stomach flipping at the sound of bones cracking. “Please stop me.” Rio reminded her before discarding her and taking off for the other two.

 There was almost too much happening at once - though Athena knew that she ought to have expected such. Given everything she knew about Lydia, she’d never expected this to be easy, but the very fact that this fae was so willing to take down innocent civilians just made her all the more reprehensible. She watched Winston and Luce work their magicks, though she couldn’t help but wince as Luce’s aim missed - though it was through no fault of her own - and hit a person rather than Lydia. She didn’t have too much time to focus, though - because she could see her brother move, the knife still far too shiny in his hands, looking incredibly out of place. It didn’t suit him, and not for the first time, she just wanted to make things better. Wanted to take on whatever he was feeling, even if she was furious that he’d managed to get himself into this, that he’d managed to get promise-bound to one of the most vile fae she had ever encountered. She leapt at him for a moment, but before she knew what was happening she could feel his hand grab her wrist and twist it behind her back and she didn’t change her expression, ignoring the slight pain that shot through her body. He was stronger, now, somehow, and she found herself admiring this fact for a split second before she heard his voice shaking - and she didn’t cry - their parents had taught them to avoid that, because in the end it could be used as a distraction - but she wanted to, wanted to take away all the terror that was in his voice. She watched him raise the knife up for a moment and her eyes widened. She’d seen him in their kitchen. She knew what he could do, but she hoped that something, somehow would allow him not to use that. He lowered his other arm until both were on the side of her arm - her non-dominant one, she noted, before she heard the snap and bit down on her lip hard -- too hard -- so that she wouldn’t scream. “It’s fine. You’re safe. It’s -” she felt herself sinking down onto the ground, looking over towards where Winston and Luce were. Ignoring whatever her brother was doing. “Corner Lydia. I can - I can do this, we just need to get her somewhere and…” she scrunched up her face. “It’s fine. I’m fine.”

 Winston heard the dull crunch of bones and swallowed feeling slightly queasy. But they had to overcome this. They had to stop Lydia. People were going to help Todd, they were going to help everyone that was under her control and now it was Winston’s responsibility to help deal with this. She had been abusing her abilities for too long and people were getting hurt. Concern flashed across Winston’s face and they dashed onwards. Their lungs burning in protest at this much exercise and sweat speckling their brow. They’d never gotten the hang of running. They honestly weren’t entirely sure how people did it to keep fit and despite every occasion in which they had been forced to sprint away from something trying to kill them they were never going to get used to this. But they didn’t have time to reach for their inhaler right now. They knew that Athena was right, they couldn’t wait for her on this though the injury that she had just sustained looked painful. Swallowing nervously, Winston pushed through the people around them.  They were slowing them down and Winston couldn’t afford the delay. Reaching out with their magic once more, Winston grasped the wires everywhere and quickly began to force them to snap taught. The metal rose from walls, concrete and even street lights like thin snakes, wrapping around the civilians and pulling them out of the way. “We need to corner her!” It was an unfamiliar town for all of them, but Winston had technology on their side -- as always--  and was quickly able to pull up a street layout. “Luce, force her to go left.” The amount of will that they were exerting on keeping everything in place was … significant and they weren’t sure how long they could keep this up. They needed to end this and fast.

 Luce winced as she heard the snapping of bone, heard Rio apologize, but didn’t hear the slightest sound from Athena. Well. Good thing she wasn’t on the girl’s shit list, because fuck. The Murder Siblings were scarier than she’d clocked them. Nodding at Athena’s shout, she continued to charge after Lydia but the fact remained-- her magic wasn’t of any use right now, not when there were too many innocent bystanders who would get caught in the literal line of fire. But, Winston was on top of that-- they always were. More cables shot from the ground, like tendrils, and grabbed at the enraptured pedestrians, restraining them. Not for the first time, Luce was grateful for their abilities, both of the magical and problem solving variety. They’d managed to create a narrow pathway through the bodies, straight towards Lydia. “Got it!” Luce yelled as she ran through the crowd. While Winston might have stopped them from being able to bar the path, Luce gritted her teeth as the people thrashed and kicked and hit, the blows landing against her as she ran. Nails scratched at her skin, drawing blood, and she felt one of the hands yank against the choker around her neck. The material closed around her neck and she let out a strangled snarl before incinerating the thin ribbon with a burst of flame. “You can’t fucking run from us, bitch!” She yelled as she sprinted towards Lydia and threw the iron spear, aiming for the space in front of her. The iron spear skewered the side of a plastic newspaper stand box, effectively barring Lydia’s path.

 Her Aos Sí preferred to practice chasing than being chased. They didn’t focus on it, considering it beneath themselves to spend more time thinking about Hunters than was utterly necessary, but one thing they had always stressed was that looking behind you would only slow you down. Lydia’s mouth filled with saliva even as she gasped for breath, and the more she ran, the less fussy she was as to who she spit on. Children were no longer off limits as she yelled for them to protect her. The whistling in one ear only grew louder the harder she had to breath, each step searingly painful with every injury from the last few days. Lydia was dizzy from it all, dizzy because her left ear didn’t work thanks to Regan’s temper tantrum. She couldn’t ignore her pain like Deirdre, or disguise it like Felix, or heal like Remmy, and she was beginning to slow, grabbing a random human for support so that she didn’t lose her balance. Lydia couldn’t hear what was happening behind her, couldn’t hear Luce’s scream or Winston’s yells, or that her human shield had a highway right through it. It sounded like she was winning, even as she stumbled, clutching her side, her breathe laborious and agonising.

 Lydia didn’t hear anything at all until a spear shot past her, punching through the newspaper stand and quivering. She turned right, staring at Luce for only a split second before spitting on a burly man and pushing him towards Luce. “RIO!” She screamed, “PROTECT ME!” Lydia turned on her heel and ducked through a back alley, which in turn twisted right, into a space full of dumpsters and a large garage for some kind of delivery van. Lydia skidded to a stop, wincing as she almost tripped over her own feet again. All the buildings joined together. Lydia jogged over to peer around a drain pipe, where she could get through to the other street… if there hadn’t been a fence in the way. “No-” Lydia breathed, spinning around. “There has to be-” There was a five storey building to her right, with a large fire escape down the side. “Thank god,” Lydia said, dropping the glamour on her wings and running over to it, launching herself into flight. Lightning speared through her back, Lydia screamed as she crumbled to the ground, her knee skidding through a week old abandoned ready meal from McDonalds. Kaden Langley had shredded her wing - without it, she could not reach. 

 There wasn’t a lot of time to figure out a plan, and Orion couldn’t think of anything that wasn’t messy. Physically compelled to help this woman who had hurt Ariana and murdered one of her friends. Forced against his will to fight against his own friends and sister. How did Rio complete his promise without hurting the ones that he loved? He caught up to Winston quickly, diving into them and causing them both to crash against the ground. Rio rolled away from them quickly and pushed back up onto his feet. “You have to stop me” Rio told Winston. Rio brandished the knife again, the thing burning against his palm. “No, no, no” Rio fought against himself. He couldn’t hurt Winston. Not anymore than he already had. Not with this stupid knife. Rio was frantic. He didn’t know how to stop himself. He glanced behind him to see Luce still hot on Lydia’s trail. “Damn it!” Rio called it, spinning from Winston. He needed to slow Luce down. But he didn’t want to hurt her. Unfortunately, as was the case with Athena, he didn’t think that was possible at the moment. He repositioned the knife in his hand, “I’m sorry” he mumbled his apologies to Luce before aiming and hurling the thing at her, aiming for her leg. Enough to slow her down, not to permanently injure her. “Knock me out. Please, god Winston. I can’t stop.” He turned to face Winston again, pleading with them before his body would force him to fight them.

 Shoving her way past the people who were trying to stop her from reaching Lydia, Luce made her way towards the woman. She needed to do this, needed to end this. In the time that she’d been gone, the coven, her mother, her sisters, they’d been in danger. And she’d had no way of knowing, because she’d been to fucking cowardly to face the shit that was happening here in White Crest. But, she wasn’t going to run away. Not from this, not from Lydia and the threat she held towards her and everyone else she cared about. Not when the woman had the power to bend anyone she wanted to her will. Luce remembered just what Lydia had done to August, had seen the way she’d forced him to promise away his magic, had watched as he’d broken his own bones. As Lydia ran in the opposite direction of the spear, Luce paused to wrench it free from the newspaper box. But, in that small window of time, she heard Rio swear and then felt the tip of a knife plunge into the back of her leg, just below the edge of her shorts. “Fuck!” She swore, the word coming out in a strangle gasp of pain. Glancing over her shoulder, she saw Rio staring at Winston, begging them. She swallowed. Winston… they had to take care of this. Grasping the knife in her leg, Luce let out a hiss of pain before yanking it out. “FUCK!” Blood rolled freely down her skin, covering her tattoos in a slick sheen of red. “Lydia, you bitch!” She snarled, knife held tightly in her grasp as she continued after the woman, forcing herself into a limping jog.

 It was becoming increasingly clear that if they all didn’t finish this off soon, Lydia might actually get away with everything. Athena squeezed her eyes shut for another moment, concentrating all of her focus on the task at hand. Her arm hurt like nothing she had ever truly experienced before, and yet she knew that she couldn’t focus on that right now. That was for later, and whatever pain she had to work through would be worth it. Not to mention, her divinely given abilities (no matter what had happened with her parents, she still couldn’t shake those words, shake that belief entirely - and now was certainly not the time to be focusing on that most of all. She was grateful for all that Luce and Winston were doing - and impressed as well, if she let herself pause to process that for any length of time. She’d express her gratitude later, once this was all done. She stood up, finally, legs far more shaky than she wished for them to be, and concentrated on the despicable, terrible, crawling feeling of a fae being nearby. Lydia had taken off, and Athena made her way after her, after Luce - she spotted her brother throw something at Luce and she winced, only for a moment, but Luce kept moving and she just had to hope and trust that Winston could control her brother. 

 Winston had been holding back a little bit. It was Rio. There wasn’t a single person in their life that meant half as much as he did right now and Winston hadn’t been able to hurt them. But their hesitance had gotten Luce hurt and as they watched the knife sail end over end through the air, Winston swallowed sadly and shook their head. “Okay… Rio ... I’m sorry.” Tears balanced in their eye as they reached into their pocket and fished out the taser they had originally designed to kill mime dopplegangers. A few adjustments had been easy enough and it worked to stun, incapacitate and kill. Flicking the settings around, Winston feinted left before bringing the taser right. They watched the two long pins of a vey heavily modified cattle prod connect with Rio’s side before they sent a long and what would undoubtedly be a painful blast of electricity through Orion. Enough volts to really do something too. They just hoped that it wasn’t too much. Orion’s body crumpled in Winston’s arms and they gently set them down, leaning them against a wall before hurtling after Luce. Sweat glistened on their forehead but there was no choice but to get her. This had to stop. They couldn’t let anyone else get hurt by this monster. 

 “No, no, no,” Lydia gasped, eyes flicking around the space. None of the fire escapes were lower, walls looming around her like a cage, the stench of rotting food and human waste filling her lungs. This couldn’t be it. There had to be some door that was unlocked, some window she could squeeze through, but she was hardly the first person to look for a way into the ground floor back here. Lydia slammed her shoulder into a door and screamed as it only rattled. If her arm wasn’t broken, if her other wasn’t burned, if her wings- Lydia’s mind kept slipping back to Deirdre, to the buzzing of her phone. It wasn’t about Texas, or Morgan, or the squished hedgehog she’d found on the side of the road. It hadn’t been, for the past two dozen calls. Lydia stepped back, her breathing shallow, eyes flicking from shuttered window to shuttered window. She should have picked up hours ago. There was nowhere she wanted to be more than in Deirdre’s arms right now. The iron spear, the copper wires, Lydia looked down at her bleeding ankle and whimpered. There had to be more than this. If she ran back through the crowd, she could push people into Winston. Twist Luce’s own mind against her with the saliva in her mouth. 

 There had to be more, but Deirdre had been calling. Perhaps it would have happened in Lydia’s living room, with the fire lit, a bottle of glass in her belly. Maybe she wouldn’t have felt the poison shutting down her brain. Or perhaps Deirdre would have slit her throat, and would have held Lydia in her warm arms as Lydia’s own heat spilled out of her in just a few short seconds. Deirdre had been calling. Because she had promised that Lydia would not die a bad death. Lydia could barely hear what was happening in the street back there, but she had seconds, and nowhere to go. 

 Lydia didn’t even realise she was reaching for her phone before she’d even decided. She was still looking around as her thumb tapped the screen. Deirdre was on speeddial, but that didn’t mean she would pick up fast. Lydia could hear only her heartbeat faster that the dial tone. Buzz, thumpthumpthum, buzz- “I rel-” but the voice on the other line wasn’t Deirdre’s at all. It took another precious second to place the panicked tones, for Lydia to recognise  Morgan’s voice. Lydia almost sobbed at the sudden relief of it, hearing it for the first time since Morgan had told her goodbye on that awful day. Lydia caught words and snippets, barely able to piece the words together. There wasn’t time. “Deirdr- Morgan, DEIRDRE, NOW!” Lydia yelled, stifling a pitiful sound against her lip. She could barely make out what Morgan said as Lydia scrabbled to hide behind an air vent, leaning her head against the cool metal. “I relinquish you,” she breathed, the single most important thing Deirdre needed to know.  The red thread that bound them together dropped away and Lydia sobbed for its disappearance. She couldn’t hear anyone nearby, so she hurriedly tripped over her words, trying to whisper what she needed Deirdre (and Morgan, by extension) to hear. “I love you, you’re the best fae in that town, no matter what anyone says, you’re like a sister to-”

 Rage mixed with adrenaline and the heady combination urged Luce’s legs forward, even as pain radiated up her leg with every step she took. She trailed after Lydia, the spear heavy in her left hand, the knife bloody in her right. Fire burned within her, the magic begging to be released. But she couldn’t, not now. Not yet. Luce limped towards the alleyway that Lydia had run down, the spear point dragging against the asphalt as she rounded the corner. Looking around, Luce’s gaze fell on the woman screaming into her phone, clutching it like it was a lifeline. Without a word, Luce raised her hand and hurled the knife back at Lydia, sending it flying towards her. It missed, bouncing off the side of the building behind the Fae woman, but that wasn’t the point. She didn’t care if it landed because the second it had left her finger tips, the witch had thrown herself forward, spear raised and ready. Luce lunged forward, using momentum and anger to carry her. The speartip pierced through the flesh of Lydia’s shoulder, but Luce continued onwards, a ragged shout ripping through her throat as she forced the spear through the woman’s shoulder and pinned her to the wall of the alleyway. Staggering backwards, arms shaking from the effort, Luce glared at the woman. She said nothing, because there was nothing left for her to say. She was going to die here, die gasping and bleeding and in so much pain. And with her would die the threat that Lydia posed to Bea, to Nell, to her mother, to all of White Crest. 

 Athena continued to follow Luce and Lydia closely. She found the two of them turning down an alleyway, and straightened her posture, slipping another one of her knives out from its hiding space and she watched, a smirk crossing her face, as Luce threw her knife at Lydia. Lydia whimpering into the phone. Athena walked up towards where Lydia was, turning her head curiously as she had those many days of dissections during her biology classes in high school. She wouldn’t go that far, now - that would be too much and might make police do more investigative work than would be good for anyone involved, but she wanted Lydia to hurt. “You know, I don’t think calling for help is going to do you much good.” She hummed to herself before she moved a few steps closer and took one first cut against Lydia’s shoulder blade. “That must burn, mustn't it? Though I believe in balance so…” She flipped the knife in her hand, grateful that the satisfaction of hurting someone like Lydia did at least something to lessen the searing pain in her broken arm. “I’ll go for the other one, too. Not the heart yet, though I am curious about if someone who has behaved in the way that you have even has one to speak of.” Athena held her knife close to Lydia’s jawline. “Don’t try to move. I’m quick on my feet, and it seems as though she is too,” she glanced over to Luce. “I’ve got more where this one came from.” 

 As usual Winston was the last to arrive. It didn’t really matter, they were still pretty concerned for Rio and would’ve much rather been checking on him. However, he was tough, whether or not he admitted it, the poor guy had been through more then many had and still managed to retain his kindness and compassion which was honestly no small feat. Yet despite all of that Winston knew that they had to stop Lydia once and for all. Their life wouldn’t be okay until then. She’d interfered too much. With Todd, with Rio, in their own life, it was all… concerning. Swallowing, Winston rounded the corner to see Lydia pinned painfully in place. She looked… well almost pathetic frankly. Pinned to a wall, helpless, covered in wounds and hurting. Winston couldn’t say anything, there was nothing to say, all they could do was watch with an almost morbid curiosity. 

 Like everything else, Lydia did not hear Luce approaching in the same way she could not hear what, if anything, Deirdre was saying in reply, the last words she might ever hear, stolen from her because of a scream. She gasped as the knife whipped past her face, stumbling back. The phone slipped out of her hands, the one good thing she could have accomplished done. The spear pierced through her shoulder, sizzling and searing her flesh as it went under her collarbone, and hit against her shoulder blade. Lydia screamed as it caught there, scraping against the bone as Luce drove it even further forward. The bone cracked and wrenched her shoulder down as the spear pushed it out of place, driving through her back and piercing the metal vent behind her. Lydia shrieked as her legs gave out and the burning iron ate at her flesh. Every thrash of her limbs spilled fresh blood down her clothes until she managed to get her legs under her again, supporting just enough weight that the spear wasn’t pressing quite so hard against her clavicle. She tried to grab the spear with her hand, only for blisters to grow and burst, pus leaking out of her hand. Lydia’s glamour fell, skin glowing, damaged wing on show, her ears extended. Her irises looked even more iridescently blue while bloodshot and tearstained. Lydia stared at Athena in confusion. 

 “No- please-” Lydia whimpered, “I haven’t done anything to you I haven-AAAGH!” Lydia screamed at the simple iron cut on her other side, crushing part of the vent as she jerked from the pain, almost passing out. But that would have been too kind, the sharp agony forcing her awake, sobbing disgustingly as  Athena held the knife to her chin, and her flesh began to blister too, the rancid smell of overcooked barbeque cloying her senses. From the corner of her eye, she saw Winston approach too. “I’ll give you Todd back!” She cried, “I’ll relinquish him, you won’t know the difference, but you have to let me go. Please, Winston, I can’t- I’ll let him go!” Whatever brief acceptance of death there had been in the quiet was gone now as Lydia rabidly tried to pull any threads of fae promise to work in her favour. She looked back to the glimmer of satisfaction in Athena’s eyes, and realised how close they were. “Please, just let me go,” she whimpered, filling her mouth with toxic saliva. “Please, please, you don’t have to do this,” Lydia reared her head back slightly then spat in Athena’s face, watching the glob of spit run down Athena’s cheek. Maybe this wasn’t it after all, hope flickering like a candle in a storm. “Help me leave, please!”

 Winston swallowed at the mention of Todd. He was their friend. He had been their friend for more time then Winston had known about all of this and although there was literally no proof that knowing Winston had anything to do with Todd becoming involved with Lydia, Winston couldn’t help but feel profoundly responsible for everything that had happened to him. Swallowing, Winston considered everything, but they doubted that either Luce or Athena would let anything happen and Winston was pretty sure that the promise would’ve been broken by her death. “I’m sorry Lydia, but it’s not really my choice, I know you took him and I know you think he’s yours to return, but Todd doesn’t belong to anyone and that sort of thinking, treating humans as if they belong to someone-- as if they’re objects to be traded and bargained with … that’s too dangerous to be…” they couldn’t say it. They might be a killer now. They might be responsible for deaths and they might’ve done wrong but Winston couldn’t admit to it. “It’s out of my hands.” They looked at Athena and Luce, wondering what would happen next. 

 Luce turned her back on Lydia, limping away from the scene as Winston and Athena closed in. She braced herself against the wall at the edge of the alley while the blood continued to drip down her leg. She was weaponless now and her fire wouldn’t do much to stop anyone who was caught in Lydia’s thrall. But, she had to do something to make sure people couldn’t just stop them. This needed to end. Lydia needed to die. And she’d done her part, she’d helped get Athena where she needed her to be. Luce gritted her teeth as she listened to the screaming, the begging, the pleading. In those moments, she could almost forget what Lydia was capable of. Almost. But, she could never forget what she’d seen that day in the woman’s mansion. With a stubborn determination, Luce knocked over a large stack of empty plastic crates, hoping they’d block the alley from the people who were no doubt clawing at their wire confines. “I don’t know how long we have here.” Luce called over her shoulder as she leaned heavily against the wall, pressing her hand against the wound on her leg in an attempt to stop the bleeding.

 She could hear Lydia screaming, and it did little else other than further spark her curiosity. Athena figured that perhaps she ought to have flinched more than she did at the scream, but she’d watched countless operations that her father had performed, and so the screaming of a fae did little to cause a reaction. Instead, it felt good, right, and although she didn’t like to think about what similarities she held to her father (not now, not now - not when she still couldn’t help but hear her parents’ words, sometimes), she did know that she felt this way; that this much was true. Winston had arrived now, without her brother, and she didn’t want to focus on whatever was going on with Ri, right now - because hyperfocus on her brother and whatever he was going through was only going to serve to distract her, and that would increase the likelihood of failing at what she’d set out to do.

 If she were someone kinder, gentler (more like her brother, she thought) then Lydia’s pleading might have done more to work its way into her heart. Athena had long ago shut herself off from feeling anything when she hunted. It didn’t do her any good, and it was part of why she was so often very successful. Shutting out everything else permitted her to be single minded, and all of a sudden she felt something wet against her cheek and her hand flew up to touch it, fingers brushing along her cheek. Well, Lydia may have been cunning in many other ways, but still had yet to figure out that Athena was a warden. “That kind of thing doesn’t work on me.” She giggled, and the sound was off, she knew that much, but everything was all happening so fast and she heard - noted - Luce’s words - they were in public and though Lydia now very much looked as inhuman as she was, it didn’t mean that people wouldn’t come running and wouldn’t come wondering about all the screaming. She shook her head. “No, you made a terrible, horrible, very bad mistake.” She ran her knife along Lydia’s jaw then. She wanted her to suffer - for what she was but now, moreover, for all the harm that she’d caused. For what she’d made Ri do, for what she’d made Ariana do, for the fact that she surpassed the normal vileness of Leanan-Sidhe and kept humans in her basement. 

 Her arm still hurt - she did her best to not focus on that either, even though it meant that she couldn’t quite do her normal handiwork. So one-handed it would have to be. Athena took her knife again, though its color was stained darker from her handiwork thus far. She hated how public their location was, despite being off to the side in an alleyway. It meant that she probably couldn’t let Lydia suffer as painful of a death as she would have wished for her to. “Are you afraid?” Her lips fell into a small smile, eyes staring straight at Lydia. She was severely injured - had been, to a point it seemed before everyone present had gotten ahold of her. Her knife sliced through Lydia’s clothing, cutting into her skin just below her heart. Not straight to the heart, that would have been too much of a mercy. Athena had memorized the most effective ways to kill, and though she’d granted her parents that to a degree, she couldn’t bring herself to, now. “She’s almost gone.” She murmured, her voice halfway vacant, not fully present. She’d checked out towards the end sometimes during her father’s surgeries in their home. “It won’t be long now, I don’t think.” Voice monotone, she turned to look at Winston. “I did what I had to do.”

 What Winston saw in that moment would stain their memory forever. Like a black spot in their mind it would continue to haunt their dreams. The way that Athena worked, the efficiency of the knife and the way that it cut through Lydia was the stuff of nightmares. But what would really bother them was how they hadn’t intervened. After all, she’d deserved it. She’d hurt so many people, she deserved this pain. She deserved to feel some of the torment that she had made so many other people feel. Though in their heart of hearts Winston was sure that wasn’t true; they knew better then to allow someone else to suffer and they would regret this for the rest of their life. Once it was all over, and Lydia lay their suffering, Winston … swallowed. Shaking themselves out of their daze, Winston scooped up the abandoned spear that Luce had left behind and tentatively held it for a moment. “I’m sorry I didn’t do this sooner…” was all they could manage to say. Their voice was barely a whisper. Their fingers tensed around the shaft of the spear before they drove it through Lydia’s heart. Blood sprayed out of the wound covering Winston’s hands, but they didn’t care. They might not have done the right thing earlier but it wasn’t too late to try and make things better. “It’s time to go.” They couldn’t make eye contact with Athena, they couldn’t look at Luce, they just had to get out of here and find Todd and make sure Rio was okay. 

 Lydia had heard the dying thoughts and fears of nearly fifty humans, she had thought she knew what it was to fear death. She had felt with startling clarity what it was to have the last tendrils of your life gently coaxed out of you after years of suffering. Nothing that prepared her for this, as Athena dragged the burning hot blade along her jaw, cutting through the burns to make fresh ones. With every cut, Athena tore apart every thread of Lydia’s sense of self, her voice hoarse as she wailed and wept. Eventually, even her begging was reduced to unintelligible gibberish, but for Athena, even that wasn’t enough. Perhaps the only mercy Regan had left her was that Lydia could not completely make out Athena’s last taunts over the pounding of her heart as Athena scraped her blade against the ridges of Lydia’s sternum, burning flesh and bone alike. 

 Every scream should have been wrung out of her, but Athena managed to tear one more out of her wretched lungs as Athena drove her knife between Lydia’s ribs. Her diaphragm and lungs bubbled and blistered under the harsh heat of the cold iron. Her vision still did not blacken, the very pain of dying keeping her awake. Like a tease, Death did not offer any reprieve quite yet as Lydia began to slowly choke on the trickle of blood that seeped into her lungs. She sobbed and tried to call Athena back to end it, not to leave her here like a bug pinned in a museum, but Athena did not turn back. Lydia saw Winston approach, but did not really see them at all, not even as they pulled the spear out of her shoulder. She did not hear their whispered apology, nor could she understand their expression, but she barely made a sound as they shattered her sternum. Her heart convulsed around the spear once, twice, and came to a final, shuddering halt. 

 There was a scream and then there was silence. Luce looked back down the alley, eyes going first to Athena, who had a ghost of a smile on her face, then to Winston, their hands covered in blood. And then to Lydia. Or rather, the body that had once been her. Remorse wasn’t a thing that she felt, not for the Fae woman. But, this was dirty work, hard work. And Winston had been the one to finish it. They shouldn’t have had to do that. Forcing herself into motion, Luce braced herself against the side of the wall as she made her way back to where Lydia’s body lay. “Hey,” She said quietly as she rested her clean hand on Winston’s shoulder, “We did what we had to do. For all the people she’s hurt, and for the lives she would have taken. We did what we had to.” Whatever it takes. The mantra returned to her mind and Luce sighed. But when would that end? 

 “You guys should go ahead. Get Rio, get him out of here. I’ll… clean this up.” Luce said with a nod, gesturing to the crumpled heap of Lydia’s body. Grasping the spear, she pulled it free from the corpse. It slid free with a sticking, wet noise and the body slumped over on the alley way. With an impassive gaze, Luce stared down at the body before her. She’d done what was right. She’d done what she had to. She did what she needed to make sure that the people she cared for were safe. Lydia would never hurt anyone again, she’d never bend them to her will. This was the right thing. 

 A circle of blue flame sprang to life around the body. Luce watched the tongues dance as she urged them higher, to burn hotter, to close in. The flames obeyed and she watched as flesh and blood, cloth and wing, give way to the fire. A thick acrid scent filled the air and Luce stepped back, her eyes watering from the intensity. It was the easiest way, the simplest solution. But, it was messy. She didn’t want Athena or Winston to see this, didn’t want them to see the way the flesh melted from the bone as the fire consumed it all. Didn’t want to have them watch the way the woman’s wings began to slowly crumble under the heat. Gritting her teeth, Luce fed more magic to the flames and watched Lydia burn.

 Winston swallowed dryly at Luce’s words as they made their way out of the alley, they knew that they had done what they had to do, but in the last year it had simply felt like they had been doing what they had had to do. They had lost so much doing what they had had to do. They had seen friends die. They had seen friends hurt. They had been hurt and they had killed. Was it two times? Three times? How had they lost count? Lydia, August, cultists, vampires. What counted as killing and what didn’t? Where was the line? Where could Winston truly say that they were able to accept what they had done. When were they going to be honest and say that they’d let this go too far. Having power … as cliche as it was meant there was responsibility … they should be better than this. The lump in their throat wouldn’t go and the blood on their hands wouldn’t stop glistening. Winston knew that Luce was right. They needed to go. “At what point do we start taking responsibility for the things we’ve done, irrespective of why we’ve done it?” Winston didn’t need an answer, after all there probably wasn’t one. Heading away from the alley, they moved back to Rio and wrapped an arm tightly under his armpit, struggling to haul him to his feet they began to head away from this, away from the now charred corpse of Lydia, away from the acrid smell of burning flesh that hung in the air.

 Orion wasn’t sure how long they had been out, only that he finally began to stir back to consciousness by being pulled onto his feet. It took a moment for Rio to adjust to the shifting before he finally jolted, stumbling forward and almost falling out of Winston’s grasp entirely. They caught him, but the sudden movement stirred a sinking migraine that had already been looming. “Wha-” He couldn’t exactly form coherent words or sentences at first. The first thing Rio was truly able to focus on was the burning pain in his side. He grabbed at it, more pain prickling up his skin as he let the memories slowly come back to him. As he began to remember what had led to him waking up here, he realized that he didn’t have the words to say, even if he could manage to speak them. How could he have been so stupid? How many people had he hurt, either directly or indirectly, by helping that woman? He wanted to cry. To scream and curse and punch the ground. But all of those actions were pointless. He couldn’t take back what he had done. He certainly couldn’t punch the pain away. “I’m going to be sick” was the first sentence he managed, breaking away from Winston’s grasp and falling against the grass. Catching himself on his palms and knees, Rio lost the little food and water he had in him. Was this caused by his guilt? The increasingly strong smell that he couldn’t ignore anymore? Maybe it was punishment for failing to complete his promise. Was trying enough? Or was he stuck with whatever consequences came from breaking a fae promise? If it was, Rio deserved whatever it had in store for him. “I’m sorry. God, I’m so sorry. I don’t- I can’t believe-” At a loss for words again, Rio stopped trying. He just wanted to go home.

 Winston had finished off the job, and Athena’s lips twisted around for a moment, unsure of what to make of that. It was a final mercy, and Lydia didn’t deserve that, but it was final, which meant there was no chance of her coming back. Rio. Luce’s words cut through to her and she nodded, she had to find her brother. She grabbed a handkerchief out of her pocket, running it along the blade, moving as she’d been taught, not thinking about it - and she followed Winston out of the alleyway as the smell of burning flesh cut through the air. It was no use to focus on that right now - it was better to think of it as nothing more than when one of the kids on the soccer team had found a dead squirrel in the summer heat. That was all this was, and any other thought wouldn’t do anybody any good. In fact, recalling that particular memory was too kind for what Lydia had done. 

 She spotted her brother, but before she could reach out to him, Winston had grabbed ahold of him - which was probably better, because now that she didn’t have Lydia’s body, Lydia’s death, the feeling of the knife cutting into flesh to focus on, she could feel the pain shoot up her arm, bruising where Rio had grabbed it and snapped it. Athena shook her head. She’d get to the hospital whenever they got back to White Crest. “You don’t need to say sorry.” She said, walking over to where her brother and Winston were. “That wasn’t you, back there.” Athena wasn’t quite sure how much of whatever she was saying was getting through to her brother; she only knew that she hated seeing him like this. It was only more proof that what she’d done to Lydia was all worth it. “You’re fine. You’re safe. She’s not going to hurt you or anyone else ever again.” She tucked away the knife, a small giggle threatening to escape from her lips - perhaps from some combination of relief and desperate, still-present worry for her brother, she wasn’t sure. It didn’t make it, and instead Athena knelt next to her brother for a moment, brushed a strand of hair away from his forehead, as gently as she could. “Everything’s alright now. I -” she looked up at Winston, looked over toward the alleyway, “we all dealt with it. Everything’s okay. I won’t let anyone try to hurt you ever again.” Another pause. “We won’t. You are stronger than you think. I’ve got proof of that. Now, I think we should get out of here, yeah?”

[connorspiracy]

Amulet You Finish || Connor, Ariana & Agatha

TIMING: Current PARTIES: @connorspiracy @detective-keen @letsbenditlikebennett CONTENT: Death SUMMARY: Ariana and Connor are out for a walk in the woods looking for something to film when they stumble upon a crime scene. 

Despite Connor’s affinity toward the supernatural and loving catching it on film, Ariana found she was able to just be a young adult around him. Like she didn’t have to think of the worries and planning that had been plaguing her for too long now. That would all come to an end soon enough, but for this afternoon, they were just a pair of friends enjoying walking through one of White Crest’s many trails in hopes of finding something cool for Connor to film. While it wasn’t necessarily the safest of hangouts, Ariana knew the woods well enough to be confident against anything they may come across. The path they walked today wasn’t one that could be found on the internet. She discovered it almost entirely by chance on a run one day and it had quickly become her favorite. There was a certain serenity that came with the less traveled trails. It allowed her to relax a bit more when her senses weren’t firing off at some new sound or smell quite so frequently. It was nice to be able to share it with Connor. “I’m sure there’s bound to be something out here. Since the full moon just passed, I think I can rely on brute strength alone without becoming furry if it comes to it. I’d rather not be werewolf public enemy number one on the internet and all.” 

Connor had come to White Crest just looking for content. He'd expected to find it everywhere, and he hadn't been disappointed. There was always something happening, and his main problem seemed to be that most of it was too outlandish for anyone to believe could be anything but special effects. He hadn't expected to actually find friends. At least not like this. It was kind of strange having people he liked hanging out with, filming or not, but he was even luckier they didn't have objections to his video-camera shenanigans. 

He had a chest mount with one of his lighter cameras attached so he'd be able to leave his hands free for balance, but even still, it was clear Ari was much more comfortable on the trails than he was. "You're like a proper woodsie person, right? I can tell. I suppose it comes with the wolf territory." Made sense to be familiar with the woods around here so you had a good place to transform away from everyone else. "What do you usually do on the full moon?" he asked, curious. 

To say she was a woodsy person was a bit of an understatement. In more ways than not, Ariana was a wolf and the woods were where she felt most at ease though her own home was starting to rival that feeling. She laughed a bit as she leaped off one of the steeper parts of the trail with ease. “You could say that. I actually lived in a tent for a while. Wolf things don’t hurt with that either. I spend a lot of time here whether it’s the full moon or not. It just feels right.” She shrugged a bit. She supposed it would be hard for a human to totally understand, but it seemed like Connor wanted to understand which was nice. It didn’t seem like he had a judgmental bone in his body which was always refreshing. “Oh, I usually go very deep out into the forest where there aren’t trails or anything. No chance of anyone showing up. Just me and the forest animals… which are admittedly delicious.” She laughed a bit and hoped her answer sufficed. This full moon had been different, but that was not of her own design. “I wouldn’t recommend going into any part of the woods on a full moon though. There’s not much in the way of control to be found for myself and other wolves.” She scaled another dip in the trail and kept a close ear out for their surroundings. Nothing smelled off either. “Filmed anything good recently?” 

The woods felt as if they were becoming darker, perhaps the canopy of leaves growing thicker as they made their way deeper into the forest. It was obvious just how at home Ari seemed. Sometimes it struck Connor just how different their worlds were. There were things about Ariana he'd probably never quite understand, but that just made her interesting company. "I've done plenty of filming campouts, but I can't imagine living in a tent," Connor murmured, shaking his head in disbelief with a good-natured little laugh. "The posh London boy in me is mortified at the idea." 

He nodded with interest as she spoke about her full moon habits. The camera wasn't turned on yet, so nothing was being picked up, no risk of her being outed to the world. Connor wasn't opposed to taking advantage of a situation to get the shot, but there were some things that were off-limits, even to him. He shuddered slightly and laughed at the mention of the animals. "Rabbit and venison are great, but raw? You must have a fucking strong stomach." The conversation turned back to him, and he gave a noncommittal shrug. "Rio and I did a haunted cabin. We should be editing it soon. I kinda didn't film too much during the whole Bloody Mary shit." He ducked under a branch, using the trunk of the tree as leverage to help him balance as he made his way around a particularly nasty root, knotted like ropes. "Was there something in particular you were hoping to show me out here, or are you just looking to make a wilderness boy outta me?" 

While Ariana did love the coziness of her warm bed, especially considering it had been warmer as of late, the comforts most considered necessities had never been so much so for her. She shrugged and said, “It was a bit out of necessity. We were on the run most of my life, but I never really minded. Out here feels like home in its own way.” She laughed a bit at the mention of being posh. “So you’re more of a glamping kind of guy?” If she hadn’t been leading the way and sniffing out what was ahead, she would have given him a playful nudge.

It was evident to her that Connor was curious about werewolf life. To her, it had never been that fascinating. It was just who she was. Ingrained in every cell of her body. “I wouldn’t recommend it for you. I mean, even when I look like this I cook them. When I look more like a wolf, well-- Wolves are kind of meant to hunt and eat fresh. Needless to say, all around I have a strong stomach.” She perked up at the mention of a haunted cabin. While she dreamed of a cabin, she could live without the haunted part, but she assumed it was no more. “That’s pretty dope. I can’t wait to see it. Probably a good idea though. Bloody Mary was kind of a nightmare and dangerous.” As soon as he asked the question, she raised a hand to quiet him. Something off in the distance caught her ear. While she didn’t smell anything that seemed like a beast, it sounded like there was some sort of struggle. She whispered, “I hear something. Didn’t have anything planned, but figured I’d sniff something out for you to film.” She motioned for him to stick close. “Move quietly and stay behind me.” She looped through the trees, following the sound of a fight ahead. They were still too far away to tell whether it was more of the supernatural or human variety. 

“Give me a fancy RV any day of the week mate,” Connor said, pulling his vape out of his pocket as they walked because he had a feeling Ariana wouldn’t exactly be keen on him dumping cigarette butts in the woods. “At least have it parked nearby so I can get in there if I need to take a shower or something.” Something about washing his balls in a cold creek just didn’t really appeal to him. “It’s cool that it’s like a home to you, though. It is pretty nice out here. I just like my creature comforts too much,” he snickered. Slightly lower chance of being eaten by some kind of monster back at home, too. But only slightly. 

He would have happily kept chatting away about the woods and hunting game all afternoon if not for the sudden change in Ariana’s entire body. Connor didn’t hear anything, but he practically felt the hairs on the back of her arms standing on end. He nodded, saying nothing as he made himself smaller, crouching and trying not to break an excessively loud twig under the weight of his boots as he moved through the golden and red carpet of autumn leaves on the forest floor. “What is it?” he finally whispered, quiet as he could muster. Everything seemed completely normal to him, but he supposed those were the perks of having a werewolf friend.

Ariana enjoyed the comforts her home offered her as much as the next person, but she found humans needed it far more than she did. She saw little issue with hopping into the creek the way she did the morning after the full moon to clean off. A patch of grass was just as much home as her bed was... Though maybe as of late that wasn’t entirely true. Her ideal would be a nice little secluded cabin in the woods. Those little daydreams quickly faded as she followed where her nose and ears led her. She was light on her feet and conscious of their surroundings. She paused briefly, picking the way to go and answering Connor’s question. “It sounds like there’s some sort of fight breaking out. You may want to stay a good deal back. You can still film. I’ll try not to get all ‘grr’,” she said with a little claw like hand motion. 

“This way,” Ariana directed as they made their way to a small clearing. There were two men in ski masks beating up on an elderly man. The coppery smell of blood coated the air as she got close and her eyes settled on the knife. Shit. By the smell of it, it seemed everyone was human. Not that she could really discern other non-shifting species from humans all that easily. She quietly snuck through the brush and let out a low growl to distract the men. It was purposefully intimidating and she stayed out of their line of sight. One of the men’s heads shot up and looked terrified. “What the shit was that?” The other man scanned the area and responded, “I don’t know, but we’ll leave him to whatever it is. He’s bleeding out anyway.” 

Another snarl resonated through the cleared area and the two men went running, not keen on seeing where the sound came from. Once Ariana could tell they were far enough away, she emerged from the brush, pulling her first aid kit out of her bag as she moved. “Where are you hurt? Who were those men?” She questioned the older man, who could only point to the stab wound on his torso. 

Connor’s eyes widened at the mention of a fight. Keen as he might be to get some good footage, getting in the middle of a physical altercation was rarely his idea of a good time. “Wait, okay--I’m turning the camera on.” He didn’t want her to accidentally wolf out mid-frame, but he knew how important it might be to have the incident on film if something happened. The sounds of a scuffle were growing clearer as they grew closer, and Connor called to Ari in an urgent whisper. “Shit. Maybe you shouldn’t--just be careful.” Most of Connor’s confidence and charm went right out the window as soon as a fight became part of the equation, but he edged closer to the sounds, keeping his body low to the ground. He could see a gathering of what looked to be men, surrounding someone who was clearly in pain. The words ‘bleeding out’ stuck out like a sore thumb.

He ducked behind a bush, heart beating so loudly he was sure the camera would pick it up. He was certain they were going to come find them, to kill them just like they had killed the poor man who was lying prone on the ground, apparently, bleeding out. Once they were gone, he finally breathed again, following Ari out of the bush, the camera falling on the ground as he rushed to the man’s side. “Shit, there’s blood everywhere. Bloody hell--we’ve gotta call an ambulance.” But how the hell was an ambulance supposed to find them out here? It was no use. He’d be dead by the time anyone made it through the woods. Connor was holding his phone, hands trembling as he dialled anyway, but a pair of white hands, quickly growing colder, gripped his. “Keep it safe,” the man whispered, pushing an amulet that seemed to appear from nothingness into Connor’s sweaty palm, and then his eyes fell shut. “Ari-- Ari, I think he’s dead…” Without thinking he stuffed the amulet into his pocket, calling 911. 

There was a certain panic that rose in Ariana when she saw just how bad his injuries were. Her hands gravitated toward the stab wound on his stomach and she grabbed a wad of gauze and pressed down on it to slow the bleeding. She could attempt to stitch it up here, but she had no concept of whether any of his internal organs were damaged. Would she just be doing more harm than good. There was no time for doubt, she applied pressure to the wound to help it clot, but her hands just ended up covered in more and more blood. “Focus on me,” she told the man, “We’re going to get you out of here, okay?” The more blood that soaked through the gauze as Connor spoke of calling 911, the less hope she had. This man was older and this was a lot of trauma for his body to go through. “I’m Ariana, and that’s Connor. We’re going to get you help, okay?” Her voice managed to sound much calmer than she felt and for a brief moment, she felt as if maybe she embraced some of Celeste’s essence. An alarmed look crossed her face when an amulet appeared out of seemingly nowhere and was placed in Connor’s hands. “Keep it safe? What is it?” Before she could get answers to her questions, she felt him sputter underneath her hands. “Wait, no!” She raised a hand up to quiet Connor for a moment as she tried to hear the elderly man’s heartbeat. Nothing. “He is- He’s dead. There’s no heartbeat. We need the police, not an ambulance.” At least Regan couldn’t give her shit for not reporting this one right away. 

“I know, I know--” It was tough to say what was trembling more; Connor’s hands, or his voice. He squeezed his eyes shut to stop himself from crying. Jesus, was he in shock? He didn’t know what this was supposed to feel like, but it hadn’t been what he had in mind when Ari told him they could go look for something to film in the woods. When dispatch answered, he struggled to get the words out. “H-hello? I need-- police. They stabbed him. He’s dead. I--it’s in the woods, I don’t even know where we are…” After some back and forth questions, Connor struggling to explain what trails they’d been on and Ariana needing to stop in to help him, they finally hung up and told the two of them to wait right there and not to touch anything. Connor stepped back, hands and clothes covered in blood. “What… what do we do?” 

Ariana stood there silently looking at the body with a look of horror on her face. Why had this happened and why was it that she always seemed to be too late when it came to saving others? The tremble in Connor’s voice as he spoke to law enforcement on the phone didn’t go unnoticed, so she stood a little taller and put on her brave face. She could do this though she needed to keep reminding herself of it. “We have to wait until they get here. Other things out here might smell the blood. I’ll be on lookout duty.” With the anxiety that was coursing through her, every sound picked up in a near grating way. As she remembered he handed Connor something, she turned to him and asked, “What was it that he wanted you to keep safe?”

Connor reached in his pocket, feeling for the amulet. He didn’t really want to touch it, and yet in the same vein, he never wanted to let it go. Something about it activated a sixth sense in him. It felt normal. It looked normal. But it wasn’t normal. He held it up for Ariana to see, almost reluctantly, but then his eyes caught sight of the black and silver object on the ground. “Fuck, my camera--” He tried to remember if they’d said anything incriminating, about Ari being a wolf. They hadn’t, right? They hadn’t talked about it on camera because he knew he wouldn’t be able to use any of that footage. “I don’t think I’m supposed to touch it.” He was normally all too happy to break the law, but trespassing and interfering in a murder investigation were on completely different levels. “How long do you think it’ll take them to get here?” 

Agatha, along with two police officers strode through the woods. It had been 10 minutes already since she responded to the call on her radio. With only a rough idea of where to find these people, they moved carefully. Here was their dilemma. Whoever had done this was still around, and if they were noisy, they would miss them, but if they did not hurry, they would miss them too. On top of that, they had to take into account this very simple fact: the woods were a dangerous place. Agatha, of all people knew this much, having lost her father to the woods. Looking at the two other police officers, she wondered if they felt anguish, being stuck with a Keen in the woods. The detective took a deep breath, stopping to gain her composure and calm back. She did not need those insecurities now, or ever, and yet, after all these years, all the good work she had done, she still asked herself if she was doing enough, good enough. Minutes passed, silent, lonely. No wind, no deer, nothing. “Well, I hope that kid didn’t get his trails wrong,” she checked her map and took out her compass, sighing. “What would you say? We must be around here?” She pointed to a spot on the map and scratched at her ear. “We have to split to find them,” she didn’t like that idea, but what choice did they have? They nodded in agreement, and each one went their separate way, circling around the same spot. 

Each minute felt entirely too long as the pair sat in silence waiting for the police to arrive. Ariana couldn’t stop staring at her blood covered hands that had tried so hard to stop the man’s bleeding. Just like Sammy, she couldn’t save him despite her efforts. It left her limbs feeling numb as she slumped against a tree. Moments ago, she’d wanted to be brave for Connor and the old man, but she found it was quickly fading now that there was no longer an action for her to take. There had to be something to do here, but they weren’t supposed to touch anything. Even if she started pacing, she’d risk covering the track the murderers left behind. She heard the police approaching and trying to find their spot. For a moment, she stayed quiet knowing they were too far away to hear her even if she were to call out. Once the light patter of footsteps was closer, she called out, “We’re over here.” She stood up and started to wave them over. 

It was rarely a good thing when Connor was exposed to the police. He’d been lucky most of the time, not getting in too much trouble over his trespassing and filming, his white privilege and family money certainly not hurting the situation. This was different though. He’d witnessed a fucking murder, and though they had the murder on film, no reason for either himself or Ariana to be suspected, he couldn’t help but be afraid. “Hey,” he called, joining in with Ariana. “This way! The body’s over here.” 

“The body’s over here,” Agatha muttered to herself, blinking and shaking her head in surprise. If only it were usually so easy. Approaching the voices, she kept her weapon in her hand, wondering who she might land on. The sight of those two college kids did seem to ease her tension, and she approached the pair, and the deceased man with caution. “Did you see what happened?” She squatted down. Her hand went to the man’s wrist, trying and failing to catch a pulse. By the state of the wounds, there was not much she could have done to help him anyway. Looking up at the pair, she frowned, and her expression did not soften as she caught sight of the camera, “you wouldn’t have happened to film this, would you?” If they did, then this might have been her easiest case for this whole year. 

A detective she didn’t recognize approached them, but this was a seemingly normal crime. Minus the weird amulet at least. There was nothing to hide here. By all indication, everything was incredibly human. Ariana finally took her eyes off the body and looked at the cop that was speaking to them. “There were two men in masks, I don’t know why they--” she couldn’t think of what could possibly drive this. She looked down at her own bloody hands and mumbled, “I tried to help-- I know a decent amount of first aid and how to do-- He was dead before I could do anything.” Now that she didn’t have to be the one on guard, she felt her composure slipping. She wanted to go home and pretend like none of this had ever happened. Her eyes glazed over as she found herself staring at the body, Agatha’s next question not quite registering. 

Connor tried to keep his cool, reminding himself that he hadn’t actually done anything wrong. Ari was covered in blood. So was he, but less so. His eyes fell on the camera that had caught the entire thing, pointing to it, his hand trembling ever so slightly. “We were just filming the woods, and each other, making a video for YouTube. I dropped the camera when we saw them. I don’t know how much it caught.” But given the position compared to the body, he figured it had caught a fair amount. Too much to risk lying. “He gave me this,” Connor said, holding out the amulet. “I don’t know why. I don’t think he wanted whoever killed him to take it.” 

“That’s alright, you did the best you could. You could have never saved him,” Agatha assured the young woman, wiping her hands clean. With a pen, she pushed open the dead man’s jacket, to check for a wallet, a phone, anything that might help identifying him, and reaching his relatives. “You did your best,” she repeated, her expression softer. The boy started speaking, and she gave him a look. He did not seem too comfortable, and while she couldn’t help but wonder if there was something else behind it, witnessing a murder did tend to do this to people, and she decided to drop that thought for now. “I’ll need to take your camera. We’ll give it back to you, don’t worry,” she added before he could try protesting. “He wanted you to take it, then? Did he say something?” She reached out to Connor with a plastic pouch. “Drop it in there, please,” whatever this thing was, it had to be the key. 

Ariana had heard the sentiment too many times to really let it resonate. Sure, it wasn’t her fault. She didn’t kill the man. There wasn’t much she could have done to save him either, but the fact didn’t change that she and death were becoming far too closely acquainted. She nodded her head and mumbled, “I know, I just… I don’t know.” There was a spaced out look on her face as Agatha continued to speak and ask questions. She remembered the man dropping the amulet into Connor’s hand and wanting them to keep it safe. But why? What was so important about a necklace that it needed to be kept safe. It’d be safe with the police at least. The idea of helping guard some amulet on top of everything else made her head spin. It was good the cops would have it. At least she hoped. She could ask Jane to make sure it didn’t do anything sketchy to the other cops. “He said to keep it safe, I think. Right, Connor?” She rubbed her hands on her arms to warm herself and became acutely aware of just how much blood was on her. Her hands dropped back to her side and she asked, “Do we need to come with you?” Everything in her hoped it was a no. She wanted to jump in the creek and rid herself of the old man’s blood that was now fogging up her senses. 

Connor really didn't want to hand over either his camera or the amulet, but this bloody mess (literally and figuratively) of a situation hadn't left him with much of a choice. He swallowed, nodding. "I know. Just be careful with it, yeah? It's an expensive model." He didn't want it to go missing in police custody. "He just said to keep it safe? I think whoever killed him was looking for it, but they didn't find it on him. I..." It had been hidden in some way, by supernatural means, but he couldn't exactly say that. "I don't know why he gave it to us. I suppose because we tried to help him. He trusted us." And the question he doubted the police could ever answer was what was it, and what did those people want with it? Connor reluctantly handed everything over. They headed to the station to have his clothes taken for evidence and give a statement, and on the car ride, he looked at Ariana, silently communicating. We need to get that thing back. 

[thattimdrakeguy]

I am very sorry for what you are going through, think that in adittion to that unpleasant people who attack you, there are also many more who enjoy, respect and follow your content, and want the best for you. I really like your reviews and opinions, and although I do not always agree with you, I respect and validate your opinion as much as anyone's because that is to be respectful with others and have common sense.--

--You should not take into account what people who are unable to respect another human being like them say, that they cannot even separate reality from fiction, all for a simple opinion different from theirs about a FICTIONAL CHARACTER, you cannot even take them seriously. If those people need to insult, despise and make someone feel less for a reason like that, it simply speaks of how miserable they are as humans on and off the internet.--

Please don't take into account what these people say, listen to those who appreciate you and show respect. I hope you feel better and I am sorry for what is happening in your life, but you can always forward with your will and the people around you.(Hugs)

I only read these ones this morning, or afternoon more accurately cause I have a very bad sleep schedule for weeks cause I been playing video games too late into the day, but I’m slowly working on it. I’m just really bad at it.

And all I can really say to accurately give my reaction to it, was that it was something I definitely needed to read first thing in the morning. If it wasn’t for those messages yesterday, and a friend helping me out I may not have even been calmed down enough to go to bed at all. I could’ve easily not gone to sleep literally at all and had been even worse today because of it to the point of having another meltdown of a day.

Like I don’t wanna make myself sound too good, because if I did, I’d feel like I was lying, because my mind feels like a bloody nose filled up with tissue paper, if that even makes a darling lick of comprehension.

I find it so entirely weird, and patronizing, and frustrating how the fandom can be, if not worse. Like I say something unpopular, I do it a lot, probably with literally every freaking character. Even Tim, because I know that quite a few Tim fans don’t like me either.

I don’t read every comic and go “Oh this must just be how it works”, because that’s not how my brain is wired. I’m Autistic, I go in-depth, I do a lot of research, that is how I am wired when I get a hyperfixation, I want to know everything. So I say a lot of unpopular stuff because I don’t just accept things, because I don’t work that way.

But it goes like this when it comes to people just being miserable, they have to make me out to either be a bigot or bias, they either don’t even read what I say, or just don’t acknowledge what I say.

My biggest point they will leave out completely to focus on other things that are either completely irrelevant and just there to make me look bad even though it doesn’t really make sense what it has to do anything once you think about it a lick more, or just make me look straight up like a crappy person.

I got really ranty and rambly after this, and I try not to take up people’s dashboards as much. So I’ll put this here. If it’ll work, cause one time I don’t think it did, and it made me panic once cause I felt really bad. But it just would not show up.

Because trying to make a bad face out of a real life living person isn’t that bad, compared to the horrors of having to acknowledge the arcs and actions that their favorite character been through evidentially.

Sorry to say and everything, but I don’t see how on Earth Tim cheating on Ariana has anything to do with a literal whole other arc of Steph being abusive and doing really horrible things, or all those “teases” that were actually flirts that were making Tim genuinely uncomfortable to the point of sexual harassment, and told her not to do, which she didn’t actually always listen to sometimes, surprisingly to some. I also don’t see why it’s so hard to comprehend that Tim kissing Steph just because he got ahead of himself because he was euphoric he was about to die, yet it was made clear he didn’t do sexually or romantically, isn’t as bad (comparatively because it’s still insanely inappropriate and weird, but I wouldn’t call him a pervert over it) to me as Steph literally pinning Tim down during a gun fight to kiss him against his will, or taking advantage of Tim believing she was dead and giving her CPR to do it again. Like I don’t really see why saying “Just read the comics” has to do with anything, because I don’t have the art skills to just make all those panels up like that. Which by the way, I don’t give a single fuck about what bad thing Steph has done. I don’t like her because a lot of her stories are badly written, and a lot of her fans are straight up assholes. Which they conveniently ignore, because I must be villainized, because they can’t handle me acknowledging something that isn’t their idealized image. But let me also state that there are assholes in literally every fandom, I just have certain ones that decide to be assholes to me. And I don’t remember the part where I said teasing was bullying either. I can’t find that on my list of thoughts in my brain. Almost like they don’t actually know how I think or what I meant. 

And I don’t know why on Earth Tim not trusting Damian to the point of being kind of scummy has much to do with Damian doing horrid things in comics they like as well. They’re their own separate people ya know? I’m not comparing characters, because I’m not actually trying to shit on the characters you should realize. Not every negative thing is formed out of toxicity. Toxic positivity where people act like not just enjoying everything is so bad is actually a thing. And I see it quite often in fandoms, and it comes from a good place, but my goodness, just let people express themselves sometimes. It’s not going to hurt anybody as long as they’re not actually an asshole or you just have a fragile ego.

It seems pretty irrelevant to me. Implying that I hate the characters because of these actions is also pretty dumb to me as well, because that’s not the case nor how it works. They keep acting like me not acknowledging the bad thing Tim does in the same posts is some showing of my bias, but no, I just view it as fucking irrelevant, because I do bring up when Tim does something bad when ever it is relevant. It is that simple. I think the only time I’ve ever even could truly come across as trying to baby and defend Tim was me saying Tim cheating on Ari with Steph was out of character, which I still hold that opinion too, but I don’t simply make shit up, I just notice how rushed it was, and how it goes against how Tim is about morals, Steph, and his literal stance on cheating. Stuff that you would actually judge what’s in or out of character on.

I just give everything the same standard. I’ve never denied Tim wasn’t passive aggressive or conscending to anyone, or has violated privacy, or was immature. If I had it was probably me caught up in the moment, and pretty weird, because I’ve actively talked about it before.

And I’m referencing stuff in the past with these oddly specific examples, that hasn’t bugged me truly in a while, but when I find a new example of stuff, I can’t help but have it come back to mind and make me question how people got to just be shivery little jerks over things like made-up characters.

I’ve acknowledged the fact that my blog was too anti-Steph plenty of times, even as it was happening, because it was mostly through anons and not me. Some of which I defended Steph on. I just had too much anxiety not responding to them, because I’d feel a sense of guilt for ignoring someone. Which I’m over and past.

I’m not going to be held down by stuff I already corrected about myself.

It’s been so heavily implied to me before, that groups just talk mad shit about me, and made up this horrendous little reputation for me among themselves, and it is so disheartening, considering I’m just this baby faced geek that read too many comics, simply explaining stuff that had happened in actual comics without actual bias. I don’t run DC Comics. I’m just a blogger that they really really don’t like, and take it as a personal attack of some kind, at least going off of how they act.

Maybe it’s what I get for expecting people to treat fiction as fiction and not a big freaking deal when I say something or don’t say something, because they’d understand the context I’m trying to explain literal events in comics as they are, and other things that happened in other situations have no relevance to what I’m saying, because I’m not making a bashing piece like they seem to think.

I know I take fiction very seriously, because I just really want good content again. But I don’t make real life people’s lives miserable. Do ya think I talk shit about Bendis all the time? Not really. I’ve genuinely probably sang his praises more than otherwise. I think Tynion’s the closest example of when I could’ve, but that was years ago at this point. I’ve made it so much more clearer it’s about the comics than them, because simply I’ve realized how scummy it is to mock an actual person, who’s probably actually a really cool guy to know. Do I fuck that up sometimes, probably. But I’m definitely not telling him to kill himself.

If they can’t acknowledge what I actually say, and continue to just try to make me look bad. I don’t personally view myself as the bad one. That’d be utterly redundant.

It always boils down to that I just acknowledge stuff they refuse to, and they just play ignorant about, and pretend they just can’t possibly understand why anyone would say it. I didn’t pull the stuff out of my ass, I have the panels. I didn’t skip anything out. At most I just don’t find the excuses they have to be freaking relevant or over power the action at hand or sometimes the literal motivation she/he had going into it.

And it’s 100% okay, but even though this is a space on the internet, and I’m practically a loser shut in. I still live in the real world and when I’m not having a bad anxiety attack or whatever else, I try to be as reasonable as possible.

I just look at it, look at the context and past contexts, look at the motivations, judge it for what I see, and move on. And never consider it a big deal until someone else makes a big deal about it.

I don’t even view every person that does it against me to be a bad person, some of them most definitely are because they go too far with it, but some of them literally have no idea proper context anymore, or they’re just very very insecure.

It’s very difficult to outright go ‘THEY’RE ALL EVIL’, but when there’s so many that are just putrid humans that want me to take my own life, it’s a wee bit overwhelming, and understandably so, yeah?

People sometimes just don’t properly process what they’re doing, because they’re so caught up in their insecurity, or possibly even a mild ego, but there’s others that will do it because they’re so quick to anger and hatred over fucking nothing.

Welcome to reality. It’s a lot like taking a train ride through a diseased rectum sometimes. But other times it’s like taking a trolley though a nice field. It’s a mixed bag, but it’s a ride that never stops but once.

An important thing I do wanna say though, is that I have everyone who supports me in my heart. I may lose my sight of that when I’m going through an episode I’m having a heckuva lot of trouble controlling, but I’d be in a much worse spot without them. Some of them are so dang respectful, and some are just so legitimately sweet and kind that it’s a blessing to have ever had an interaction of any kind or level with them.

I don’t take any of you for granted even if sometimes I seem ignorant of it during a terrible depressive episode.

You often don’t agree with me and can make it very clear, but it’s the respect you give me nonetheless that I take as precious, because it’s some of the best stuff to receive when all else seems so bleak and lifeless. It’s not an honor everyone sadly receives, so I treasure that a lot. And when I’m feeling so down and out, it sometimes can be the one thing that keeps me even near level, and that’s such an honor that even if it’s such a small amount, because obviously it’s a Tumblr blog I’m always aware of that, it just does mean a lot to me, because it genuinely is an honor to me.

I love you guys a lot. I hope that’s always obvious even when I’m making a mess out of myself. You guys are some of my favorite people on this planet.

[imperiusv]

I - Oh, I just died in your arms tonight

I think it was during that damned pub crawl , that i first thought of you in that way, we were kinda organizing it, if i remember correctly, i was with all my gang and Dilara too and at the time i was into her, we were flirting back and forth , but i didn’t want to make a move on her, because i was insecure , that she won’t like the real me, being so fragile at the moment, I thought to myself i wouldn’t want anything like that to fuck me up even more, I needed more time to heal and develop, so yeah for the first time in my life, I ignored and rejected  someone who had more sexual  market value than me, it was really fun, as she wanted , but yeah that’s whole different story, so back to the pub crawl, I was with Dilara the whole evening, we even got tied up in that game, but the conversation was kinda boring and stale , so I quickly proceeded to get wasted, to make her more interesting, all my squad was there too, except for the germans and i think Key didn’t come,as they had gone to the one before. It was a really good night, before i got drunk as fuck, but that evening i noticed you and was the first time�� me thinking that you are actually kinda cool and cute. Funny enough you introduced me to Baptiste that evening,strangely for a person that remembers everything, this is something i can not recall even to this day. Halloween was  quite a special day for me  on that day I finally came to accepted that  i had a crush on you . That’s why my ringtone for you was that ariana grande song you hated, focus, because I finally focused on you, that you are something special, a fucked up girl I thought I could fix and in fixing her, perhaps mend my own wounds and fix myself, never have I been so wrong. I did save you from the Pit, pulled you out at the cost or my very soul, you of course repaid me in kind , I traded my freedom and who I was for you. A mistake I will never forget or forgive myself for.  It was a really posh evening , you making my make up and stuff, me making dumb jokes, cuz i didn’t know how to act around you, it was all really cute, i didn’t even realize it at the time,when we went to Indie, we all had a good time, that turkish/french girl wanted to fuck both me and Timur, but he pussied out in the last second and we didn’t have a threesome that time , which sucked, cuz she was really hot that evening and probably things between us would have been different, imagine how something so small can change a lot of stuff down the line, everything has consequences that ripple in time and change your world. We went to shots after the party, I didn’t want to spend money in the centre, as i was already spending most of my cash on booze and other dumb shit, that winter semester i spend more than five thousand bucks on booze,parties and having fun, all the hard earned cash i got in Germany, also i prefer your company rather than being with the others, which worked out great , as we clicked and had always a good time when it was just us. We tried that stupid weird game as i wanted to challenge you to do something with me, but we were too wasted and the music was too loud to hear one another, funny thing that the entire evening the slovaks were stalking us and later she was complaining.  The next big episode was the famous couples party that we hosted together for sure, we arrived for our own party fucking wasted, as you even recorded in your diary, by that time i was already really hooked into you, after the traffic lights and Halloween party,  I remember at that bloody party , that i was looking so desperately for your match , the whole kissing thing - to find your famous partner ( Shrek and Fiona,Cleopatra and Mark Anthony) i invented for you, but unlike the next such party, i didn’t have full access nor control over the drawing of the numbers, the next one was rigged af, never told you that , but i hooked up more people than Cupidonis himself. Imagine my surprise when you kissed some stranger, it was disgusting, but my fault entirely. After that i saw you kissing Alfredo in the bathroom,my heart sunk and i went outside to drown my sorrows in the vodka bottle we had hidden in the bushes, thank God for Timur. The next couple of parties you didn’t come of course - the mustache and nerds/hipsters bullshit, there was this thing with Antonio and you blowing me off , cuz i was a dick, but who cares, btw i really wrote him last year out of desperation to reach out to you in some manner to see if you still care,the fact that he didn’t even bother to reply, proves what kinda of scumbag shitty slug he is - a disgusting spineless person and a liar, he never fucking came close to kissing Justyna , let alone banging her,what a sad joke that fat wanker was and still is! So yeah through malus I managed to get you to come to the preparty at Etienne’s place for the i think it was a bad taste party or some other shit. It was such a great evening, that you ruined or I ruined , idk who is to blame, me having feelings for you or you being a slut. The whole squad was present, even fucking Pierre came , it was glorious , a night full of booze, laughs and good times, until you decided to make out with Alfredo again in front of everybody and more especially me , even after i tried to stop it from happening, I remember you said that he kissed you and you didn’t want to. but i was too wasted to remember, so yeah i was rage incarnate, damn I had so much fucking anger in my during those months and the ones after, it was like I can’t even comprehend now how can someone be some enraged all the time,i was never calm , just a whirlwind of emotions , a tornado and a volcano in one, losing complete control over the slightest of mishaps happening , i really had no control over myself back then, but yeah  , praise the Emperor, that Timur saw what I was about to do and stopped me on time, or i was gonna make an even bigger fool out of my self , punching that smug Italian faggot in the face for something that was not his fault. I ended up with Dilara in Blackroom ,but she didn’t want to play second guitar and i wasn’t in the mood to even talk to her, so she went home with some guy and as I was drinking outside, minding my own business, trying to make sense of it all, guess who came crying. You were really upset and embraced me and cried,never felt so low as you told me why you were crying, i couldn’t hold it any on and added gasoline to the fire, by confessing my feelings for you, such a beta move that was, what was I thinking or drinking. Couple of days of drama and then came my birthday, to which you actually came and brought me a cake, it was one of the sweetest things someone has ever done for me,at that time we were already good friend and texting back and forth all the time , even before we were together we had around 500 000 messages between us, which i do not know how it’s even possible. But yeah the first birthday party, it was all good, until you pulled out a Victoria and vanished on me, again i was left with a thumb in my mouth, looking like a fool. The second Birthday party  was actually Timur, Ouriel and mine’s , we did it cuz we wanted to get wasted and i didn’t want to celebrate together with them, as my redneck friends didn’t like Erasmus people and Timur needed a reason to get wasted then and on the first of December which is his actually birthday, so  technically only Pussiel’s , but yeah whatever. It was  in Yavuz’s place you didn’t want to come , but we managed to get you there , you and your green umbrella - weeks of flirtations and tension building up to the event, finally shit was going down. The party was wild, around 40 people in a top floor flat , we had hit up a casino with Timur on the days prior and had won some good money , we bought so much booze and even a disco ball , also got some amateur DJ to play EDM. I was trying to avoid you, but then you  came to me and we started talking. Soon i went from golden to drunk, and being wasted, i let go of all the dumb things that held me back , like what would people say and how will everyone react i was finally brave enough . As i looked deep into your eyes , i remember how you  bit your lips and said this will ruin everything. And it did. I took your face into my hands and                                                    Ausculor we made out probably for a good two- three minutes. But at the same time it felt like eternity and few seconds, i couldn’t really tell, my dopamine and Oxytocin receptors were exploding Inside my brain, i felt like i was high, better than cocaine, booze or whatever, we connected, body mind and soul. Release. My knees were soft , i was euphoric , literally felt like the best thing ever. You just had kissed me. As i want to end up every story with something positive i will end  it here. The next one will continue right off the bat from this one and will cover up the next couple of months as they were crucial  for the whole story. It must’ve been something you said I just died in your arms tonight It must’ve been some kind of kiss I should’ve walked away, I should’ve walked away

[deadcactuswalking]

REVIEWING THE CHARTS: 14th April 2019 (Khalid, BLACKPINK, Jonas Brothers)

The BBC page I usually use for this show was an absolute mess with so many incorrect placements when it first debuted, so I’m glad they changed it.

Top 10

For what I believe is its seventh freaking week, somehow, Lewis Capaldi once again fends away competition with “Someone You Loved” still sits at the number-one spot.

Also, we have another whopping increase in positions this week right at number-two, where thanks to Billboard being racist, apparently, and a remix being released, “Old Town Road” by Lil Nas X, now featuring Billy Ray Cyrus, now places, up 37 spots from last week. It’s Lil Nas X’s first top 10 and top five hit in the UK, as well as Cyrus’ third top 40 and second top 10 and top five hit over here, becoming his first hit in more than 20 years since 1992’s “Achy Breaky Heart” and “Could’ve Been Me”.

At number-three, down one spot off of the debut last week, we have “bad guy” by Billie Eilish.

Thanks to the immense boost for “Old Town Road”, Calvin Harris and Rag ‘n’ Bone Man are down one spot to number-three with “Giant”.

The biggest boost of last week, “Piece of Your Heart” by MEDUZA and Goodboys is up five to number-five, becoming both artists’ first ever top five hit over here in the UK.

At number-six is Tom Walker, with “Just You and I”, which is down only two positions from last week, but the BBC page says it’s “down 21”, and as much as I wish it was, it’s sadly still here in the top 40.

Jonas Brothers are down two spaces to number-seven with “Sucker”.

Dave’s “Location” featuring Burna Boy is down only a single spot to number-eight.

Thanks to the release of his album Free Spirit over the weekend (I’ve heard it, it’s actually pretty good for a relatively sleepy album of pop tunes), “Talk” by Khalid with production from Disclosure re-peaks up seven spaces to number-nine.

Also after album hype dies down, Billie Eilish’s “bury a friend” is down four spots to #10, rounding off our top 10.

Climbers

We just have two notable climbers this week, those being “MONOPOLY” by Ariana Grande and Victoria Monét boosting up 17 spaces to #23 since it didn’t have a full tracking week last time, as well as “Swervin” by A Boogie wit da Hoodie featuring 6ix9ine moving up five to #29, for some reason.

Fallers

We have a few more here, but much less than last week, with Ariana Grande’s “break up with your girlfriend, i’m bored” finally starting its exit, down six spaces to #15, perhaps due to streaming cuts but maybe just the start of a natural decrease. Naturally off of the return last week, “wish you were gay” by Billie Eilish is down eight spots to #21, while “Keisha & Becky” by Russ splash and Tion Wayne continues its fall down five spaces to #30, as does “Murder on My Mind” by YNW Melly down five positions to #35. Finally, “Streatham” by Dave unfortunately but understandably is barely clinging onto the top 40 chart as it drops seven spaces to #40.

Dropouts & Returning Entries

First of all, “Better Man” by Westlife prematurely drops off from the #26 spot it had last week, but I’m still shocked by how their success in 2019 is actually lasting much longer than I thought. I guess boy-band nostalgia is hitting recently with Backstreet Boys and the Jonas Brothers, but I didn’t think it reflected on the UK boy-band scene from the early 2000s as much. Other than that, “Thotiana” by Blueface has its streaming numbers cut off as it drops out from #28, and other drop-outs include “Please Me” by Cardi B and Bruno Mars from #32 and finally “High Hopes” by Panic! at the Disco from #37, as well as “7 rings” by Ariana Grande from #38. There are no returning entries so it’s time for the main attraction.

NEW ARRIVALS

#39 – “Cool” – Jonas Brothers

Produced by Ryan Tedder and Zach Skelton – Peaked at #23 in Scotland and #27 in the US

The Jonas Brothers are back... again, I guess. I wasn’t a fan of “Sucker” and it’s safe to say I didn’t expect much at all from a follow-up single. It was going to be cookie-cutter and boring, with weightless production... but I didn’t expect what we got in the end, which is about Nick and Joe Jonas just being so damn cool... which they’re not, really, are they? At least if they are, we don’t know because not only can I not tell Jonas from the other Jonas, but these lyrics for their fifth UK Top 40 hit do not give me any reason for me to believe that they are cool in any way. If every little thing you do is cool, then please break from your painful falsetto chorus and lay down some facts about you that are cool, instead of saying you “feel like Post Malone when you get home” and that you’re waiting like Game of Thrones... what? Listen, not only is the vocal mixing shaky and the guitar solo one of the worst I think I’ve ever heard, mostly because you can both barely hear it but also because it has no strength or punch that guitar solos are supposed to have, it’s not ethereal either, it’s just a waste of studio time. The immature subject matter and forced references to current pop culture moments are what to expect of Jonas Brothers, surely, but when they were teenagers making music for Disney films, that was okay. When you’re adults who have all made attempts to distance yourself from that cutesy image and have made rough, sexier music in the past, this doesn’t work. I hope that this Jonas Brothers comeback ends up a fluke, and also that Post Malone feels embarrassed he brought this song onto the world, because you just know they thought of that one line after hearing Post’s Jonas reference in HIS hit “Better Now”, and built an awfully rushed song around it.

#36 – “Let Me Down Slowly” – Alec Benjamin featuring Alessia Cara

Produced by Sir Nolan and Aaron Z – Peaked at #1 in the Czech Republic and #79 in the US

So this is rising star Alec Benjamin’s breakout hit, with a remix and/or duet version from Alessia Cara, who was in Benjamin’s place a few years ago, however she’s since disappeared from off the face of the Earth, so we’re left with this collaboration between the two that might actually be pretty damn good. I love the smooth guitar melody that is backed up by a nice bass and cloudy backing vocals acting like synths behind Benjamin’s almost childish voice that makes his high-pitched hook feel perhaps naive, which is helpful since it is a ballad about wanting a break-up, albeit expected from Benjamin, to be a slow process instead of immediate or emotionally intense, as Benjamin just wants to have some sympathy, but both feel like they’re not as invulnerable as they felt when they first got together, losing their “dignity and grace”, with Alessia Cara’s vocals sounding as great as she did on her three other UK Top 40 hits on this mellow beat that is dramatic but not too melodramatic this time, instead having a pretty slow-build up with the climax being Benjamin repeating one line, “And I can’t stop myself from falling”, as the strings and synths get louder, representing his desperate frustration. Yeah, I like this – I wasn’t necessarily amazed as I’m still not into Alec Benjamin’s vocal tone really, but it’s pretty good, and I can definitely see this being Benjamin’s first hit.

#33 – “Kill this Love” – BLACKPINK

Produced by Teddy, R.Tee, 24 and Bekuh BOOM – Peaked at #1 in Malaysia and #41 in the US

“Kill this Love” is the most recent single and EP from K-pop girl group and now international starlets BLACKPINK, and it’s probably the song that explains what I think of K-pop as a whole. While I don’t mind the horns that are often present that can often sound like very cheap, FL Studio default plug-in loops, and K-pop as a whole often feels very behind Western pop, this in particular sounding like 2014 EDM, specifically the trap genre (Not trap-rap, I should add). Most of the BLACKPINK girls aren’t necessarily bad at flowing and they all have charisma, with the singers sounding okay but there’s no real flow here, and that’s one of my main issues with the genre. It can feel very hodge-podge and slapdash a lot of the time, without much effort put into actual structure or forming some kind of natural build-up into the drop. Whatever part the song gets to, none of it stays long enough to really be familiar or even catchy, and that’s the part of K-pop I love – how there are so many bloody hooks in one song, but this song is lacking in both those hooks and really any notable melodies, mostly because it doesn’t give any of them room to breathe. All in all, much like “IDOL” by BTS the year before, BLACKPINK’s second UK Top 40 hit is more of a mess than it is an effective hit single, and I think this’ll drop out quickly after the initial wrath of K-pop stans racking up YouTube views comes to a halt. Sorry, guys, but I’m not a fan.

#32 – “My Bad” – Khalid

Produced by D’Mile – Peaked at #10 in New Zealand and #55 in the US

Now I personally quite liked Khalid’s new album Free Spirit, even though I know for a fact a lot of people didn’t. While Khalid’s brand of “sleepy music” personally appeals to me as it feels much more genuine and well-crafted than most other pop or R&B that’s coming out right now, I understand how it may seem too cloudy or lacking of substance, and this song in particular is not one of my favourites, and while not the worst on the album, exemplifies what I think everyone is seeing as Khalid’s weak points. While Khalid sounds nice here, he just sounds “nice” and it’s not enough to really make up for the really janky beat with some drums and a guitar that really feel like they should switch places in the mix, and the 808s hitting like a truck on innocent civilians. The song itself is about Khalid feeling bad about ignoring a text from his significant other and accepting all the blame, but if that really hurts your relationship that much, then I’m not sure about the shaky state of your relationship to begin with and it feels like just a bit odd of a subject matter to take this seriously, with the bridge essentially just being Khalid vocally riffing for 30 seconds. This is pretty boring and disappointing from Khalid’s 11th UK Top 40 hit – he has much better on the album, specifically “Bad Luck”, “Right Back”, “Don’t Pretend” with SAFE, “Self”, “Heaven” and “Twenty One”.

#25 – “All Day and Night” – Jax Jones, Martin Solveig and Madison Beer

Produced by Jax Jones and Martin Solveig – Peaked at #10 in Belgium

Of course the highest new arrival is from a bunch of EDM DJs featuring a female vocalist making what is probably going to be some vaguely tropical or vaguely deep poppy house music, because that’s all the EDM we get on the charts. I’m not saying none of it is good, though, in fact, I’m a fan of a lot of electronic dance music, ESPECIALLY house, so a lot of it I actually like to some extent or can at least see the appeal in. This is the first single from currently buzzing DJs Jax Jones’ and Martin Solveig’s upcoming collaborative studio album Europa, featuring vocals from underrated pop singer Madison Beer. Honestly, this really isn’t of note, its base synth melody sounds like a Wii Shop Channel loop and while I love Beer’s voice I’m not entirely sure if the mixing is doing her wonders here, and the build-up to the drop is basically nonexistent, with just a few clattering synths coming in pretty much out of the blue, with a generic big room house drop, which is what I expected but there’s no real groove to back it up. It’s not funky like Jax Jones’ other stuff and it’s not really fun at all, which if you haven’t figured out EDM is supposed to be. Overall, it’s a bit of a dated, minimalist bore that barely even lasts two minutes before growing old.

Conclusion

I see a new branch of Summer hits debuting here, actually, and I’ll be interested in seeing how all of these songs go after their debut, all of which are in the bottom half so they all have that risk factor – they could grow and become bonafide smashes or they could get caught in the shuffle, but even in the songs I don’t like (which to be fair is most of them) I see possible hits. Worst of the Week is definitely going to the Jonas Brothers for “Cool”, though, and even though I don’t hate “All Day and Night”, I don’t like it, and Jax Jones, Martin Solveig and Madison Beer are sadly getting the Dishonourable Mention. None of the other songs really show up as highlights except the Best of the Week, which is going to Alec Benjamin and Alessia Cara for “Let Me Down Slowly”. I really see that one succeed. Follow me on Twitter @cactusinthebank for more pop music ramblings and Top 20 rankings, and I’ll see you next week!

  �H��

[survivormarmoreal]

Episode #8: "The fajitas are truly guiding me" - Matt

OMG i made it to the merge. Im so happy but now let the game begin.

im so sad. dennis was such a king. and to be taken out by nick... like idek what to do with this merge. ppl i want to work with: nathan, maynor, brian, anna?, matt? idek if i wanna work with brian its just i like meeting new ppl NNN i wanna work with sharky too. but like nathan loves nick apparently. like... no ty!!! nicole... keaton? no ty! my preferred boot order is just keaton. nick. nicole. thats it idc!!! i dont wanna work with like og absolem tho bc theyre all tight without me but the other options arent good either EFKJDSAHKJ. i am waiting for redemption island twist pls and ty although my luck jaydne comes back NNn well these are initial thoughts woohoo

PHEWWWWWW I MADE MERGE BITCHES!!!!!! Honestly that tribal was so fucking cracked and all kicked off in 20 mins at the end with nick revealing he had an idol. and YEET i was so close to playing my idol as well. The fajitas are truly guiding me (even tho i am eating them tomorrow for lunch and I am very excited hehehe) Brian, myself and sharky are gonna align (tho not telling about the idol tho) so woooo lets go merge!

I hate my life. a forced self vote? no thanks. UGH TIME TO DIE!

WE FUCKING MERGED! And I got rid of Dennis. Which I do feel slightly bad about it but it was time to make a move. I playing loose this season and I'm going to see how far it takes me. I have alliances with Maynor, Brian, Nathan, Annabelle, Matt, Nick, and sort of Nicole so that puts me in a pretty good spot as long as I don't overplay and show my cards too soon. I've got to walk the line very carefully. And ngl careful is not my strong suit.

Ok now Let's rank my mergemates. 1) Brian- husband. 2) Matt- second husband. 3) Maynor- best man at my double wedding to Matt and Brian. 4) Annabelle- my fave underrated queen. 5) Nathan- I love him but check back in a few rounds ok. 6) Bryce- we barely talked but he loves Chi Chi Devayne so...I love him. 7) Nicole- ...every season needs a purple edit 8) Nick- cool kid but I'm sooo bitter about wanting him gone 3 tribals in a row 9) Keaton- who?

Well, merge is finally here and i get to reunite with Sharky. Which is great because he was my duo from the begining and now i have Keaton as my other duo.i also have Bryce as well. Nathan wants to work with keaton and I so thats good and i believe he’s tight with Annabelle so shell come along as well. Thats already 5 with me is 6. As long as none of them are targeted first vote and others are. Ill be sitting in a good spot. From here the first vote, i wouldnt mind voting out Nicole. Only one to yet to talk to me besides saying hi.

WEELLLLL!!! I merged, ladies (and lads)!  I cannot believe it, but I have made it!!  I think I know what my strong points are right now in my game and I just have to keep playing on them.  I'm a lot stronger socially now and I want that to continue going into the merge.  I have allies in every single little aspect of this game, and I want to ensure the people I'm not working with go first.  So less than half of these hoes better watch their backs!

Now that I've merged and have freedom with who I want to work with, I'm definitely going to try and solidify my quad-some with Sharky, Nathan, and Annabelle as a final 4 alliance and also make sure that my other final alliances (one with Bryce, who I just met up with, and then one with Matt) also are stronger than ever before.

I usually do like cast run-downs and... idk... I haven't yet in this game, but I guess I will now going into the merge!!

Annabelle - A queent!!  I absolutely love her and wish that a trio of Ariana stans (with Marie) could've gone through!!  I can't wait to strengthen my bond with her and for us to slay this game together! Bryce - I may have just met Bryce in game, but I've known him for a little bit!  We have never really had a full-on conversation, but we have talked in passing and in some League games.  I've talked to him for like... 30 minutes so far... and he's already a top person in this game for me.  Love him! Keaton - idk him, but he's already trash talked Marie to me... so .... bye ! Matt - I adore him... he's... an angel!  I see myself working with him for a long time in this game, and I have to hope he feels the same hehe... Maynor - eh!  I like him, but we don't.... click... so if he goes home... he goes home... :S... Nathan - LOVE HIM!  He's so funny and so nice and he says we have a final 2, but girl... if we get to final 2 together it's by sheer luck because I shoreeee as hell know he's going hard or going home.... and I'm not playing that same balls to the walls type of game! Nick - LOL OK??? Idols replace social play and gameplay ig!!! Nicole - I just wish she was more active because I'd love to really put all my trust in her, but I don't really ever talk to her! Sharky - ANGEELLLL!!! Das my game hubby... I adore him so much... I really thought I was going to go into this game wanting to fuck him up with a lawn mower, but here I am putting all my eggs into his basket and trusting him completely... I hope I'm making the right decision!  I know he's a big threat, but I just lahva him a lot! Ugh..

This challenge is very interesting. Im just hoping that I somehow get enough points to get the high amount. Immunity would be great. Still working out who i could work with and who i would target. I know for sure that im going to be with Keaton and Sharky. Still dont know about the others yet.

I do not want this immunity. There's like weird touchy subjects vibes. If I win it means a lot of people wanted me to get immunity so I'm well liked which will translate to "Threat". I told the jock destroyers to give me negative items. So hopefully if my other allies give me positive scores it will even out to a smooth 0 and I can stay relatively under the radar.

So I went idol hunting and I got closer than I had ever gotten before. I could just tell. So I gave Brian the info and told him where I went wrong. And he didn't find the idol but he DID find a steal a vote advantage! So Brian and I are getting a nice little tool belt around our waists. Now we just need to get all these people to do what we want.

Everyone is being really quiet. But thats okay because this gives Maynor and I a great opportunity to strategize. To my surprise he threw out Nicole's name! Which is great. It might be too soon to go for her because I've been talking Dinah strong for a few rounds now (even though I voted Dennis out). But it's still good to know that she's on his radar. Now the goal is just to set up a F5 alliance that Brian and I can ride to F6. Maynor and I still have The Scream Team alliance and I'm loyal to that. So if I can move forward with Maynor and Brian then I can just fill in the others as we go.

Okay SWIFT UPDATE. Maynor brought up Matt's name and I was basically like "Um...I don't want to do that" and then discovered that he doesn't think Nicole has his back at all. Which would undermine any Dinah strong stuff. And I'm not going to stick my neck out to save her over a vote on my side for a few more rounds. Especially if she might flip anyway. Hmm…

Now I'm getting a chance to talk game with Anna! This night is really picking up. Unfortunately she seems to have some animosity towards Matt. Why does everyone hate Matt? I think he's bloody awesome! Oh well. She also isn't a fan of Nicole or Keaton so I can direct her target that way for a few votes and for now we seem to be on the same page minus the Matt thing.

Sharky and I are still up at midnight. We came up with a tribal vote plan which is awesome. The target tonight is going to be Nicole. I feel like shes a threat and needs to go. Sharky and I created an ideal final 5 which is me, Sharky, Brian, Matt, amd Bryce. My side alliance is Keaton and Nathan. On the outs is Nick, Annabelle, and Nicole. We are saying that Keaton said Nicole’s name and that Nicole said Keaton’s name. But main targetbis Nicole. Hopefully this plan works and Nicole goes tonight.

Things are falling into place baby! So Maynor wants Nicole/Keaton/Matt out. He thinks he can get Bryce on board. Annabelle also wants Nicole/Keaton/Matt out. I know from The Jock Destroyers Alliance that she (and I) have Nathan's vote. Anna also says she wants to work with Bryce. And Bryce told her that he feels close to Maynor. (I'm realizing Bryce is a HUGE social threat and I'm not going to be able to keep him around for too long but for now he's a number on my side.) Now, both Maynor and Annabelle also love Brian. They both also know I can bring Nick to the table because Nick trusts me. So right now I perfectly situated in the middle of a 7 person voting block. Am I a mastermind?

CLASSIC ANNABELLE. I set up this whole majority situation and told her to choose Keaton or Nicole and we can make it happen. BUT SHE WON'T CHOOSE. I love her but she always does this. She's so about being quiet that she refuses to ever make a move. Last time we played together she said I was a bully and never asked her what she wanted. Now I'm trying to be a better ally and listen to her moves AND SHE WON'T MAKE ANY. So frustrating.

Having Keatons name out was good cuz now he wants to target Nicole because she is the other name thats been thrown out. My alliance of mkn is helping get the votes for Nicole which is great.

so the names thrown out are keaton or nicole and its looking like nicole is gonna go bc ppl think shes a better player bc she gets far in tumblr games which like i guess is tea but its just sad that meta has a factor :( esp when shes like irrel in this game noah fence KJFADSHKFJAS. and like maynor prob has f2 with keaton.. but idc i guess she ghosts me all the time so w/e. im just hoping next round we can get like someone whos actually a threat out.

I WON IMMUNITY which means I made single digits!  I'm so happy with myself... I didn't really do much to deserve it, but I'm so happy I won because it means I can be a little more ballsy this round with throwing out names and whatever!

I'm thinking of voting Keaton out as a sort of revenge for Marie, but Nicole's name is out there, too, and I just really want to make the right move to launch my game into the next round in an even better spot!  I feel like the top of the world right now, and I want to keep that high.  The immunity challenge showed that even though I think I'm a fucking mess, I'm doing well enough socially.

As for that, I want to quickly add in that I love all my allies so much.  Sharky just helped me find a vote steal power which will be so useful for the long run of this game, and I cannot wait to use it to hopefully slay.  Nathan and Annabelle are angels and are also really nice for me to bounce ideas off of.  Bryce is just amazing to talk to and I really see him in my longterm plan.  Matt's another person I see in my longterm plan.  Ideally, this is probably my top 6... and I've since grown closer to Nick and we are working together "for the sake of Sharky", but I think he's more-so a side piece for me in this game!

So....I’m pretty certain I’m leaving because nobody wants to talk of anything of substance with me. It’s hard because I know I deserve to go, I haven’t been in a place mentally to give everything I need to, to this game. But that doesn’t mean I want to leave. It’s just hard, Dennis was my number one ally and now that he is gone it’s gonna be hard to reform my trust and alliances with everyone. Oof. It’s alright. Hoping that someone can use me as a vote about now but, don’t think that’s a possibility.

So I am keeping VERY quiet about my disadvantage, as I don't want anyone to know about it and jump on a bandwagon to use it against me! Like no thanks I'll pass. It looks like it'll either be Keaton or Nicole, would much rather it be Anna but she's immune smh. As long as my name ain't mentioned I'll be Gucci I hope. REEEE

Now that everyone is awake it's time to put in some work to execute the plan Anna/Maynor/myself made last night. We need to get everyone on board with voting Nicole. But I also need to make sure Nicole feels safe just in case she has an idol. I'm going to talk to Matt and Nick. As long as they vote Nicole we should be solid. I'm also going to start an alliance chat with the OG Dinah members so that we can talk about strategy and make sure Nicole feels safe with us. Then as long as everyone is telling the truth (cause no one ever lies in Survivor) it'll all be good.

Can i say that Sharky making a fake alliance chat with Nicole when we are planning on voting her out is very cold blooded. Like honesty doing it to try and throw off her scent of the vote is perfect.

I’m so glad sharky seems to be much more transparent with me. I’m really excited to see how this goes tbh I feel like we’d make a good pair. We be played together before and I thought he would be made at me for like wanting him out in canadienne but yeah I’m excited for merge!

Okay the alliances just keep piling up. It's definitely going to cause an issue later on. But for now it's good. And the newest one, The FB Bois, is one I actually do plan on staying loyal too. I really trust Matt and Brian. I like them both a lot and I want to work with them. Hopefully they feel the same. F4 with Brian, Matt, Maynor is my goal.

We are coming close to tribal. Its nerve wracking cuz it looks like nicole hasnt scrambled so she might have an idol. Im going to see if my side alliance would vote for Matt (keaton and nathan). Just in case there is an idol played. But as far it looks like Nicole is going.

For once my name hasnt been a top priority! its crazy... I really dont know what to do about it but im loving it so much... lets just wait though until I get out in about 30 mins...

Nicole is voted out 6-3-1.

[deadcactuswalking]

REVIEWING THE CHARTS: 17th November 2019

Three consecutive weeks and we get eight, seven and now NINE new arrivals! This week isn’t even an album bomb week, either. I’d say I fully expect the charts to cool down and for Christmas music to start coming back but I have no idea. I’ve predicted a slow week for two weeks in a row and I’ve just been greeted with more and more nonsense coming at me, so I’m not even going to try and speculate here.

Top 10

The top five often doesn’t reflect that movement within the charts, and this week is no exception as everything in the top four hasn’t moved, and for a sixth week, “Dance Monkey” by Tones and I is at the #1 spot.

I expected “Don’t Start Now” by Dua Lipa to drop off after the debut but surprisingly, it held on, showing a lot of initial longevity here at number-two, the runner-up spot, although I could very much see this grabbing the #1.

“Ride It” by Regard featuring Jay Sean is still at number-three this week.

Also not moving at number-four is “South of the Border” by Ed Sheeran featuring Camila Cabello and Cardi B.

At number-five, we actually have a new arrival and our biggest of nine debuts this week, J Hus’ “Must Be”, his lead single from an upcoming project, album, mixtape, what have you. It’s his first solo single since he was released from prison in April this year, and we’ll talk more about Hus and his music later, but just for now, it’s his eighth UK Top 40 hit and it’s pretty great.

Now, there is some impact of this important top-five debut of course, although “Memories” by Maroon 5 climbing up two spots to number-six is a direct result of J Hus’ high new arrival.

The real impact is seen within the rest of the top 10, as “Circles” by Post Malone is down two spaces to number-seven.

Also down two spaces to number-eight is “Lose You to Love Me” by Selena Gomez, which is falling off a tad quicker than I thought, although it could easily rebound.

Lizzo’s “Good as Hell” featuring Ariana Grande is also down two spots to number-nine.

Meanwhile, at #10, Lewis Capaldi’s “Bruises” is dropping down one space to the final spot here, but not near fast enough.

Climbers

Unless you’re a diehard fan of “The Last Time” by the Script (which is up six positions to #32 off of the album release, which should actually be incredibly disappointing for the band), there’s nothing to speak of here.

Fallers

Fallers on the other hand... well, it’s been a while since we’ve done this. Let’s split it into two vague genre sections: pop, rock and EDM vs. Hip-hop and R&B. First, let’s focus on the first section, as “Lights Up” by Harry Styles is down seven to #23, “God is a Dancer” by Tiesto and Mabel is down six to #26, “Liar” by Camila Cabello is down five to #29, “Post Malone” by Sam Feldt featuring RANI is down nine to #30 (Thankfully), “Someone You Loved” by Lewis Capaldi is down six but I have no idea how it’s still on this bloody chart anyway and “10,000 Hours” by Dan + Shay and Justin Bieber flops down six spaces to #35. None of these drops are exactly disastrous for the artists here, although the drops for “10,000 Hours” and “Lights Up” seem worryingly premature. In terms of hip-hop and R&B, we have “Be Honest” by Jorja Smith and Burna Boy finishing its run down eight to #25, “Follow God” by Kanye West flailing down 12 spots to #27 whilst it’s not even Top 40 in the US, “Tell Me” by Krept & Konan featuring D-Block Europe and Ling Hussle down 14 off of the debut to #37, “Take Me Back to London” by Ed Sheeran featuring Stormzy and remixed by Sir Spyro featuring Aitch and Jaykae down five to #38 (Typing that each time takes about 20% of my overall writing time), and finally, “Floss” by AJ Tracey featuring MoStack and Not3s is down 12 spaces to #39.

Dropouts & Returning Entries

There are no returning entries, and honestly none of these drop-outs are ones I’m worried about or unfortunate drop-outs, because none of these songs are really worth mentioning. Let’s cover these in order of how little I care for them. “Orphans” by Coldplay, dropping out from #32, is a great lead single yet it’ll definitely rebound next week as the album Everyday Life is released, “Kiss and Tell” by AJ Tracey and Skepta is the only one here that really worries me as it’s out from the debut at #31 (It could still rebound, but perhaps this just isn’t catching on), “Higher Love” by Kygo and Whitney Houston is okay but it did have a respectable run before dropping out from #34, “G Love” by Krept & Konan featuring Wizkid dropped out from #28 but that song doesn’t exist anyway, neither does “Graveyard” by Halsey out from #40 for that matter. “Break Up Bye Bye” by the cast of RuPaul’s Drag Race UK (Specifically the... Frock Destroyers?) featuring uncredited vocals from Perrie Edwards is out from #35 as expected since the season’s finished, “Look at Her Now” by Selena Gomez monotonously hums its way out of the charts from #39, as does the regrettable “Playing Games” by Summer Walker out from #36, and finally, we have the detestable “Thumb” by M Huncho and Nafe Smallz out off of the debut at #30. I’m frankly kind of disgusted we ever let this chart in the first place.

NEW ARRIVALS

#40 – “Better Half of Me” – Tom Walker

Produced by Cam Blackwood and Mark Ralph

We all know singer-songwriter Tom Walker at this point. His debut album, What a Time to be Alive, went #1 and already produced two singles: “You and I” and “Leave a Light On”, both of which are inoffensive, boring guitar-pop fluff. This is his third UK Top 40 hit from this record and I’m not expecting anything close to any good or God forbid interesting from it... and, yeah, I’m right. The song’s a guitar ballad with Tom Walker singing in his nasal voice over some generic instrumental with piano and guitar with no attempt to even make it sound rich. The whole mix sounds really cheap, especially the transition from the pre-chorus into the chorus. Speaking of the chorus, Jesus Christ, Tom, have you been listening to Lewis Capaldi? It’s almost funny how Tom puts so much force into that part and it feels like a really inorganic warble and just sounds pretty gross overall. The lyrics are pretty sweet sometimes, though, I especially like the first verse. Otherwise, yeah, this is boring, milquetoast trash.

#36 – “Pump it Up” – Endor

Produced by Endor

Who’s Endor, you wonder? Well, I was wondering that too, so I looked it up and I found that Endor is a fictional moon in the Star Wars universe, known for its endless forests, savannahs, mountain ranges, and a few oceans. Okay, no, I’m kidding, obviously, but this dude seems pretty obscure, he wasn’t even on my first page of results for the term “Endor”. He’s not from Star Wars, he’s not from the Hebrew Bible, and he’s not a nation from Dragon Quest either. He’s a British house DJ who’s been releasing stuff since 2015 and became a self-proclaimed “Champion of the underground” before finally breaking out in the mainstream with this single released September this year on Defected Records, obviously his first UK Top 40 hit, and I mean it can’t be that bad if he’s latched on for so long with an underground fanbase. I mean, Skream likes him, and I like Skream, so it can’t be that bad.

Well, that wasn’t Skream, but it was interesting. It starts with some crowd cheering and the main hook coming in, which is delivered in a fun way (It kind of has to be, it’s just “Pump it up, you’ve got to pump it up, don’t you know?” for two and a half minutes), before the drums and the keys come in, and then the bass, and slowly it becomes a pretty fun, vibrant banger, with a pretty anti-climactic first drop but the way the 808 (or in this case, possibly 909) is modulated here is especially cool, and I love the cheesy Eurodance synths in the drop as well, and the second drop has a cool glitchy effect I really like. This isn’t bad at all, in fact I’d argue it’s pretty good house, it’s just that I wish there was more stakes here, because it just feels weak and at times empty.

#34 – “Gangsta” – Darkoo and One Acen

Produced by AJProductions

Okay, well, I’ve actually briefly heard this song on the radio, but I don’t know who Darkoo is, so naturally, I had to do some research again, and I found out she’s a female singer and rapper in the same vein as her male contemporaries who makes UK trap or drill music (I can’t really tell the difference a lot of the time if there is one, to be honest). I can’t really find a great comparison off the top of my head to a rapper she resembles in the mainstream currently stylistically, but that shouldn’t matter. Darkoo blew up three months ago with the song “Rover” (or “Keys to My Rover”) and this is her big first UK Top 40 crossover single with One Acen, who we know from their collaborations with people like Hardy Caprio. I believe this is One Acen’s second UK Top 40 hit, though I might be missing one. The most important thing is: is the song any good? And well, it’s okay, but Darkoo doesn’t sound any different from her counterparts, female or male, and has very little character, but to be fair, she’s not exactly helped by this absolute crap guitar beat, with a clap that I’d like to ask a lot of questions, and chipmunk vocals echoing her lazy interpolation of “Strike a Pose” by Young T & Bugsey. Darkoo’s vocals have constant stuttering put onto them as well, while One Acen’s vocals are a lot smoother, and don’t sound bad at all, especially the start of the first verse, but I can’t pay attention to anything else when the beat is mixed this awfully that it’s genuinely giving me a headache! The bridge is pretty cool, especially the strings and the gang vocals that elevate it, but everything fades out afterwards and hence it just sticks out like a sore thumb. This outro sounds like someone put a piano beat’s MIDI through a Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time soundfont.

#28 – “Don’t Rush” – Young T & Bugsey featuring Headie One

Produced by GRADES

And that’s all for anything resembling anything other than UK trap (Excluding another upcoming new arrival), as I guess the last song was kind of R&B. Young T & Bugsey are rappers I had a pretty uninteresting first impression with although I liked their second hit single, “Strike a Pose”, as that had a lot of energy and groove, and a pretty great feature from Aitch, who has yet to impress me since if I’m honest. Headie One is someone who I was also initially bored by, but he did win me over with “Both”, a banger I still listen to due to its menacing guitar line and gorgeous soul sample. This is Young T & Bugsey’s third UK Top 40 hit and Headie One’s fourth, and I’m actually expecting some quality here... and well, I have no idea what that 80s-sounding synth and guitar sample is in the intro, but if that’s original, then this producer needs more attention because that sounds fantastic. It just transitions into a pretty dull Afroswing beat though, with none of the groove that “Strike a Pose” had. In fact, this is just “Strike a Pose” again, but now Young T and Bugsey have separate verses instead of one shared verse, and there’s no humour to this one and just feels like a bunch of filler bars. Only one line made me laugh here and I’m not sure if it was even intentional or not, but on their last single, Aitch was hilarious, sure, but both Young T and Bugsey delivered some equally sleazy lines. Here, I’m just bored by everyone, and Young T sticks to one flow for his verse (For the most part). Bugsey shares his verse flow with his chorus, so the whole song just kind of meshes together. Bugsey introducing Headie One with the same grandiose synth riff that was in the intro is a pretty fun idea, but it’s not worth it because Headie One is boring too. At least it’s professionally mixed, which is better than most of the more B-list UK trap that charts in the second half of the top 40.

Edit: Nevermind lol the bass is clipping throughout the chorus. Also realised I never talked about the line that made me laugh. In the first verse, Young T might have interpolated MC Smally and if he hasn’t, he’s used the same inflection and that’s hilarious to me.

#24 – “ROXANNE” – Arizona Zervas

Produced by Jae Green and 94skrt – Peaked at #1 in New Zealand and #27 in the US

Now for our only diversion from UK rap, but still vaguely in hip hop, Arizona Zervas, an R&B singer-songwriter who was starting a humble career before suddenly, TikTok found this song and now he has a global hit single. His live shows are pretty prolific for such a new artist... I am a bit weary of Arizona Zervas being a bit of an industry plant because this song blowing up so quickly is all too convenient, especially considering he got the playlist placement within three weeks. I don’t know, and I don’t care, it’s his first UK Top 40 single. Is it any good? No. I listened to the whole song and just sat there thinking what I could talk about... which is nothing. I guess I like the splashes of guitar and the... oh, for God’s sake, whistling? Sigh, well, the lyrics are questionable at times, and the second verse is pretty obviously ripped off from somewhere, and the guy sounds whiny and infuriating. That glass breaking sound effect is pretty corny as well. Also, Drake did the “Shake and Bake” / Ricky Bobby joke nearly exactly 10 years ago, Zervas, and he didn’t sound nearly as gutless saying it... wow, Drake sounding tougher than you really is an insult. Sidenote, why is “BedRock” five gruelling minutes?

#18 – “Down Like That” – KSI featuring Rick Ross, Lil Baby and S-X

Produced by S-X

From here on out, we only have British hip hop to talk about and now this is a name I didn’t expect to see... YouTuber and semi-professional boxer KSI, who after winning against Logan Paul, stated he would be working more on his music (He said this in a Good Morning Britain interview with Piers Morgan, by the way) and I didn’t expect this so soon, but here it is. It’s not KSI’s first time charting, it’s actually his second UK Top 40 hit after “Lamborghini” peaked at #30 in 2015, but he seems to be taking music more seriously now and without all the nonsense diss tracks he released (most of which genuinely charted), as he’s got his highest-peaking single yet and some pretty high-profile features from Rick Ross and Lil Baby, as well as relatively unknown British rapper S-X, who also produces the track. It’s his first UK Top 40 hit, but Rick Ross has a lot more (The information for this on his discography page is messy, scattered and often non-existent so I’m not bringing up specific numbers) and it’s Lil Baby’s third. I’m not expecting anything great from these guys, but I’d like to be surprised.

I wasn’t. S-X sounds pretty flat against the menacing piano line, especially when he gets into the falsetto but this beat isn’t bad, especially with the distorted vocal sample, although the vocals here are typically pretty muddy, which is expected considering a YouTuber recorded them. KSI is the lead artist but he doesn’t really give much of an impression, although his Dragon Ball Z reference was a nice touch, I guess. Rick Ross comes in with ad-libs about being the biggest in the game, and I always love a M-M-Maybach Music tag but his verse but is non-existent. Lil Baby sounds confused and initially off-beat, with his flow ending up sounding pretty janky, as he also refers to Rick Ross as “the biggest” and his verse sounds like it abruptly stops mid-sentence. Somehow, KSI had the best verse here, as the American rappers didn’t really seem to know how to adapt. Good beat, though.

#15 – “Paper Cuts” – Dave

Produced by Ghosty

I’m tired of writing these introductions at this point, I have to write nine of them and explain everything and... ugh. Okay, this is Dave, we all know him if you read the series, he’s a UK rapper who’s very introspective and typically one of my favourites. This was marketed as the first time he would rap on a drill beat, which has me wondering how well he’ll fare on a track he didn’t actually produce (He usually does self-produce). It’s his first lead single since the #1 album, PSYCHODRAMA, and 15th UK Top 40 hit. I am a bit worried for the upcoming record though, if there is one, as he’s been keeping himself busy with pretty lacklustre features and a mediocre Top Boy soundtrack single. Regardless, is this new song any good? Well, Dave sounds pretty Dave here, talking about his past with his typical flow and contrived wordplay about Anakin from Star Wars and Red Bull, as well as an awfully misguided tangent about Megan Thee Stallion. Dave sounds really awkward here, which is odd as not only is this beat great and eerie but it’s also pretty much in his wheelhouse. This isn’t bad, but I feel there are people who could have made this a lot better and more organic or even just hyped up as the song as it is, it’s a slog and wildly uninteresting, despite only being three minutes. Good beat, though.

#13 – “Netflix & Chill” – Fredo

Produced by Kirk Beats

Fredo? Oh, come on, he’s one of the least interesting guys! Okay, well, he’s a UK rapper all the same and he can be pretty funny and wild when he wants to, like on his #1 hit, “Funky Friday”, with Dave, and even “So High” with MIST where MIST was just dead weight. Overall, I just find him okay most of the time, but it’s his seventh UK Top 40 hit and without any features, I doubt I’ll like this... and you know, maybe I’m wrong actually. This guitar line is pretty slick and the vocal samples are cute here, and the chorus is actually pretty fun with Fredo actually singing for once... although his vocals are awfully punched-in here. Jesus, that sounds unprofessional, but otherwise the trap beat is pretty cool, and his flow in the first verse is constantly switching and his style of casual, careless braggadocio is actually clicking with me here. His second verse is surprisingly long and despite him lazily repeating some of his bars throughout the verse, his bars can be pretty funny. The mixing is strange here, especially vocally, and I left this feeling conflicted if anything. Again – good beat, though.

#5 – “Must Be” – J Hus

Produced by JAE5

Finally, it’s the last song and probably the best one, to be honest, but I’ve already talked about the chart placements and all that nonsense, so let’s discuss the song – because it’s really freaking good! Okay, so perhaps some context here: J Hus is a pioneer of the genre ‘Afroswing’ and a pretty respectable rapper as well, although I personally didn’t like many tracks from his first and so far only studio album Common Sense. In June 2018, Hus was arrested for carrying a knife in Stratford and after changing his plea from not guilty to guilty, served eight months in jail. During this time, he would deliver a verse for Dave on “Disaster”, which is one of both rappers’ best songs. I think the most powerful statement I’ve heard from J Hus is when he was asked why he had a knife, because he responded, pretty simply, “You know, it’s Westfield”.

He was released on 5th April, 2019, to much rejoicing from his fanbase, the British rap community and his colleagues but since his release, he’s actually been pretty scarce – he made a guest appearance hours after release at a Drake show in London, and has done some features for Skepta, MoStack and... Ed Sheeran, but there hasn’t been any solo material until now. This is his massive comeback single, and, yeah, it’s great. Let’s talk about the lyrical subject matter here first and get that out of the way: J Hus is singing about paranoia and trauma he experiences now due to his time in prison and his roots in gang violence, giving him a tough exterior that isolates him from everyone else. Both the chorus and the end of the first verse sum it up pretty well.

If man slip, get up, dust yourself off / Everyone F off, yo

The second verse dives into being “Guilty by association” and with an incredible rhyme scheme, Hus mostly talks about how if someone dares even talk to his enemies, they will become an enemy, and how he doesn’t trust people anymore, but also interesting touches on how young black men struggle to fit into society without resorting to rapping or being a gang member, although he doesn’t do this in a serious manner, and is actually pretty humorous wordplay and just general turn of phrase.

I think he’s an opp, but I need confirmation

All that doesn’t matter if it’s not delivered well... and of course it is, with that groovy bassline and synth embellishes in the intro thanks to JAE5, and a funky trap beat with cute pitch-shifted chipmunk samples and a freaking sax loop just coming in whenever it wants to. In fact, the instrumental feels pretty frantic initially, but the second half of the first verse is just beautiful. After the epic drum fill, some grandiose, sweet-sounding synths come in and it’s just gorgeous. J Hus has a lot of charisma even if he tends to mumble in the first verse, but his voice is just so sonically pleasing to me, man, I could listen to him all day. Well, this is miles ahead of the rest of the rap here, and that outro with the string composition in the background might be one of my favourite musical moments of the year. Welcome back, J Hus. Glad to have you back.

Conclusion

Well, it should be obvious that J Hus is taking Best of the Week for “Must Be”, with Honourable Mention probably going to Endor for “Pump it Up”, although it isn’t that great. Dishonourable Mention goes to Tom Walker for just being boring with “Better Half of Me”, but I think Arizona Zervas is taking Worst of the Week for the sappy, gross “ROXANNE”. I don’t even want to try and make sense of what’ll happen next week. Interestingly, we’re going into the Christmas season with a lot of hip-hop on the chart, although we know most of this won’t survive the Winter and... well, you know what happens in Winter. Follow me on Twitter @cactusinthebank for more musical ramblings and I’ll see you next week!

[deadcactuswalking]

REVIEWING THE CHARTS: 3rd March 2019

This is a surprisingly chill week for after the BRIT Awards (which I commented on in real time on Twitter @cactusinthebank if you want to check that out), but there is some movement related to the ceremony so let’s just get through this.

Top 10

We have a new #1 this week, that’s right, for its first week ever, some lame Lewis Capaldi song I heard once called “Someone You Loved” is up two spots to the top spot on the UK Top 40... you can tell the charts are pretty dry right now but honestly I can’t complain that much, it’s less work for me every week. This is obviously Capaldi’s first #1, as he’s a new artist.

“Giant” by Calvin Harris and Rag ‘n’ Bone Man is also up two spots to number-two, thanks to a BRITs performance with Sam Smith and Dua Lipa.

This means that Ariana Grande had a few fallers this week, “break up with your girlfriend, i’m bored” being first, down a spot to number-three.

I’m surprised “7 rings”, also by Ariana Grande, is only down three spots to number-four.

“Don’t Call Me Up” by Mabel is still steady at number-five.

Sam Smith and Normani’s “Dancing with a Stranger” is also staying still at number-six.

“Options” by NSG featuring Tion Wayne is up two positions to number-seven. That’s cool, it’s a good song, I guess.

“Walk Me Home” by P!nk is our sole new arrival in the top 10, debuting at number-eight this week after its live premiere at the BRITs with Dan from Bastille (Because, sure, why not?) and becoming P!nk’s 43rd Top 40 hit and 21st Top 10 hit. Those numbers are crazy, and she definitely deserves to have won the Outstanding Contribution to British Music Award as well as a place on the Hollywood Walk of Fame, even if for personality alone. We’ll talk more about the song later.

Oh, and “bury a friend” by Billie Eilish down a space to number-nine.

Finally, thanks to the album and BRITs win, “Just You and I” by Tom Walker is up nine spaces to #10. Blech.

Climbers

Thanks to the massive hype behind Lady Gaga and Bradley Cooper due to the Oscars performance, the current US #1 has also increased greatly, up 10 spaces to #11 this week and potentially gaining more next week and re-entering the Top 10. Otherwise, “Talk” by Khalid with Disclosure is up seven spaces to #13, “Thotiana” by Blueface rides the meme and remix wave up eight spots to #15 (His first top 20), “i’m so tired...” by LAUV and Troye Sivan has a five-space increase to #17, entering the top 20, becoming LAUV’s first and Troye Sivan’s second top 20 hit in the UK. Thanks to the video, as I predicted, “MIDDLE CHILD” by J. Cole rebounds seven spaces up to #21, with “Grace” by Lewis Capaldi also up six spots to #24.

Fallers

Thanks to streaming cuts (In the UK, after a certain amount of weeks in the top 20 or so its streaming becomes less important to its chart placement), well, it’s safe to assume it’s due to streaming cuts because these were massive, long-running songs, Post Malone’s “Wow.” is down seven to #14, “Play” by Jax Jones and Years & Years is down seven to #22, as is “Lost Without You” by Freya Ridings to #25. “Nothing Breaks Like a Heart” by Mark Ronson and Miley Cyrus also suffers from streaming cuts, down 10 to #27, taking that bloody “Baby Shark” song with it down nine to #34. Otherwise, we have “Please Me” by Cardi B and Bruno Mars down eight to #20 despite a video being released very recently, and “Hello My Love” by Westlife is down eight to #32, yet still not quickly enough.

Dropouts

Since the album hype died down, “needy” by Ariana Grande is out from #11, “Swan Song” by Dua Lipa is out from #32 (Didn’t expect it to last that long anyway) and “Gun Lean” by Russ is out from #33 due to streaming cuts (Hip-hop thrives on streaming). Also, “Psych Out!” by AJ Tracey is out from #34, “Happier” by Marshmello and Bastille is out from #34, “365” by Zedd and Katy Perry is out from #37 (Oof), “Without Me” by Halsey is finally out from #37 and “a lot” by 21 Savage featuring uncredited vocals from J. Cole is out from #40 thanks to 21 Savage actually being freed, I guess?

Returning Entries

We have more than usual this week. Let’s start with the BRITs returns. First, due to a Calvin Harris mash-up performance featuring Dua Lipa and Rag ‘n’ Bone Man, “Promises” with Sam Smith is back at #37. I’d say “One Kiss” can’t enter because three Calvin songs are on the chart, but that’s untrue, so I guess that it just didn’t enter the top 40 – it is outside of it but I’m surprised it’s not up here, especially since it won an award. Also thanks to a performance featuring a guest verse from H.E.R., “Thursday” by Jess Glynne is back at #35. Otherwise, thanks to “needy” leaving, Ariana Grande’s “thank u, next” returns to its rightful place on the chart, at #30, where it should have been last week really, but dumb UK chart rules and all that. “High Hopes” by Panic! at the Disco is back at #39, because, I mean, sure, and “Nights Like This” by Kehlani and Ty Dolla $ign is back at #33. I wonder if he gets any of the royalties while he’s serving 15 years in prison for cocaine possession.

FEATURED SINGLE

“Faucet Failure” – Ski Mask the Slump God

Produced by ChaseTheMoney & Cubeatz - Currently charting at #100 on the Hot 100

Before we get to the new arrivals, let’s talk about a fun, goofy trap song from one of my favourite rappers currently in the game, Ski Mask the Slump God, energetic borderline comedy-rapper from Florida who brags with pop culture references constantly littered throughout. You probably know him since he’s gotten pretty big thanks to the release of his album STOKELEY, with this song in particular recently getting a music video directed by Cole Bennett of Lyrical Lemonade fame, hence it counts for this segment. Now, the trap beat is simple and bassy but the synth is almost hypnotising and I like how producer ChaseTheMoney adds what sounds like bongos and tribal percussion at random yet perfect intervals. Ski Mask often changes his flow, with a charismatic performance reflected by both his verses and ad-libs. In the first verse, he talks about how his girl wants to see his “Purple pickle up in the wind” – no comment, with some clever Thanos-related wordplay before that catchy and hilarious chorus, where he not only mentions Ash from the Pokémon anime but how he’s flyer than an ostrich, and he stands by that, I guess. The second verse is just about him buying fast food, but that fast food he’s ordering throughout builds up to a punchline where he asks where his weed his, because he was supposed to be buying “pies” (Drug lingo) instead of actual McDonalds pies. It’s pretty wacky, pretty cool, although it’s a bit short, check it out, and check out some of STOKELEY, especially “Foot Fungus”, “Nuketown” featuring Juice WRLD and “Reborn to Rebel”.

Remember days, me and X hittin’ licks!

God, I can’t seem to be able to escape this dude even in death, huh?

NEW ARRIVALS

#40 – “Black” – Dave

Produced by Fraser T. Smith

This barely charted but I’m so glad it did. This is the lead single from his upcoming album Psychodrama, and in stark contrast to “Funky Friday” with Fredo, this song focuses more on societal issues black people have had to face as the name implies. This is his seventh UK Top 40 hit, and probably his best yet. It starts with a crispy piano melody with even some nice static added to make the beat feel vintage and interesting (Yeah, it isn’t an overpolished trap beat this time). As Dave starts spitting, the drums kick in and slowly some violins creep in and make this beat really cinematic and beautiful. In the verses, Dave describes what being black is, which is being mistreated, and is having to go through struggles and going the extra mile for not the same results as white people would celebrate.

It’s workin’ twice as hard as the people you know you’re better than / ‘Cause you need to do double what they do so you can level them

Dave delves into some fantastic storytelling during the first verse, using walking a (Most likely white) elderly woman across the road without any thanks as an example of the belief in the lyric above, which also briefly references being told during his life, especially early life as a child due to the white-washed media and his living conditions in comparison to how he perceived the white children at the time in fancier, wealthier statuses, that he is more disposable than white people and cannot reach the same heights due to his race, to the point where he just accepts it, and that despite everything he’s forced to do to prove himself as a minority, he’s proud of its race and his ancestry. In the second verse, he speaks of accepting defeat and how he constantly feels the need to shout out all his friends unfairly imprisoned in jail in songs because he would feel guilty otherwise. He also discusses cultural appropriation and how he believes everyone wants to have the culture but not the colour as this means they would be considered cool, but not targeted with any of the discrimination. He ends the first verse with saying that being black is a sour flavour, but excellently switches it to sweet at the end of the second because he knows that white people will want the “flavour” but not the reality. The production furthers the intensity of his delivery and overall, this is way too good to be charting, but deserves all your love. Dave is one of the best in UK rap right now and this proves it, his album is coming out next week, check it out.

#31 – “Murder on My Mind” – YNW Melly

Produced by SMKEXCLSV - Currently charting at #14 on the Hot 100

Oh, speaking of people stuck in jail, introducing YNW Melly. Melly, or Melvin as I think his personality he decided to have on this song is, is a rapper who blew up thanks to a relatively okay collaboration with Kanye West, but since that song dropped out of the charts, people care more about this one mostly due to its confessional nature because of how he seemingly admitted on Instagram that he killed two of his very close friends (No reason provided), also from the YNW collective, and has turned himself in, although he just plead not guilty. It’s not about that, it’s about someone else he killed, I’m pretty sure, and honestly the descriptive, storytelling nature of the song is really cool, and it goes into some (Suspiciously) grim details that I appreciate because most rappers don’t care about that and just drift off topic while this is constantly focused, although his delivery could be less grating, and the beat is just really a cheap FL Studio piano melody under an overpowered bass, although the effort at making a pretty interesting bridge with the pitched-up female vocal samples are appreciated. You can tell it’s amateur, mostly because of how the final verse sounds like it just had some Audacity reverb effects added to it and the record label never changed it to make it sound more professional before having it on Spotify. For what it is, it’s okay, but I can’t really get into this. I think I like “Mixed Personalities” better, to be honest.

#8 – “Walk Me Home” – P!nk

Produced by Peter Thomas and Kyle Moorman - Currently charting at #54 on the Hot 100

Okay, now we have the big one, and I don’t care. Listen, Alecia Moore is a fantastic vocalist and one of the best singers in pop now, potentially pop history as I know it, and is one of the most successful women in the industry, with a clear personality and rebellious sense of humour that was unique. As she’s matured, she’s kept the singing and songwriting talent, but she’s just turned too bland for me to be interested anymore. This song is okay, but it doesn’t have any of the charm she used to have, and I know that’s bound to happen with age but that still doesn’t excuse this mediocre effort for me. It’s a guitar-lead track with pointless pitched-down vocal samples, way too percussion-heavy mixing and rhyming “good” with “good”. It’s a really upbeat, inspiring, motivational cheer-up track that will be a powerful “Wake up in the morning and get everything done” anthem for middle-aged mothers across the nation, but for me, I can only respect the underwhelming songwriting, in which she uses “Mm-hmms” as filler for an empty backing track, which is something I never thought P!nk would HAVE to do, just something she’d WANT to do, but she has no other option here, this instrumental is so wishy-washy and boring. It sure is listenable, guys. Let’s conclude.

Conclusion

I’d feel bad giving P!nk the Worst of the Week because it’s not a bad song, and I can see talent in YNW Melly as well, so screw it, it’s not going to the industry legend OR the nobody who became famous and immediately got charged for double murder afterwards. It’s not going to anyone. Best of the Week goes to Dave for “Black”, obviously, and see you next week.