#because I''m a crier
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Well, I guess let's review this past year a little different and highlight the not so great parts.
This 👇🏻 is how I ended 2023.
I knew it would get better eventually, I knew I had to hold on and just keep pushing through. But it didn't get better immediately after that, it got worse actually. At that point I had only one surgery done. And then I had two more in the span of a week, right before Christmas. Three surgeries in eight weeks take a toll, not just physically but also mentally.

This 👆🏻 is what life looked like in January. (Do we think Tumblr will let me keep it up or make this post rated mature?) It was absolute shit. I was at my limit. I'm usually very in tune with my body but at that point I wasn't at all. I was sick of not being able to do shit, I was sick of sitting on my sofa and staring at the same four walls day in day out.







That is fortunately not how I'm ending 2024. It got better eventually, as I knew it would but it was a lot of fucking hard work. Like A LOT. A million doctors appointments, two radioactive pills, copious amounts of physical therapy, oncological therapy, rehab and rehab mandated sports class, yoga, so many tears (there was a lot of crying involved, so much fucking crying) and god knows what else later, I FUCKING MADE IT.
By May life looked like this 👆🏻 again. Seasonal depression (on top of everything else going on, what a joy) was gone come spring, and mentally I was doing heaps better.
But it still wasn't all sunshine and roses, especially physically. Had a set back in March when I was technically allowed to do Zumba again but my first class back destroyed me. Finally ended physical therapy at the end of AUGUST!!!! But the shoulder still wasn't pain free. That actually took until the end of November. After a second attempt at Zumba, this one successful, I sat in my car and wept, so fucking happy.
Today, as the year comes to an end, I can finally say I am 99.9% healthy again. The cancer is gone, the shoulder is able to do everything again and doesn't really hurt anymore. It's still not a hundred percent but that's probably because they had to reattach a ligament and I can somewhat feel the "string" they used to sew it back to my shoulder with. It's a weird feeling but it doesn't hurt really, and I guess over time I'll get used to it.
I wanna say a big THANK YOU.
Thank you to everyone who helped me get better, in small or in big ways. Thank you for this hellsite for bringing me some form of entertainment. Thank you to the fic writers for giving me lots to read in the 10 months I spent not working, 4 of those being an absolute horror movie.
Thank YOU GUYS for worrying about me, for cheering me on, for your kind words. Thanks for entertaining me with posts, fics, and conversations when I was bored out of my mind. Thank you for letting me rant and vent. Thank you for something as simple as our conversations, even just those kept me going. Thank you for sending Christmas cards or care packages, thank you for letting me come visit you as soon I was able to so I could escape for a little while. Thank you for keeping me company, putting my hair together when I couldn't, preparing food for me and god knows what else. I wouldn't have made it without you guys.
@paperstorm @loveconquersall @thebumblecee @beautifulhigh @heartstringsduet @celeritas2997 @goodways @carlos-tk and everybody else ❤️ I love you guys!
#of course I am now also sitting here crying#because I''m a crier#2024#leaving all this shit behind me now and just taking you guys and your support with me into 2025#I hope I didn't forget anyone#LOVE YOU
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the thing with autism right. is i know if i was having a full mental health crisis what i would end up doing is going to the emergency room and being like "hello, my name is (x) birthday (y), um i was hoping to talk to you about potential mental health inpatient care? i'm currently having a mental health crisis and don't think i can be trusted on my own" like if there's one thing i can be sure will live on in me no matter how hard the brainworms try. is my fucking customer service voice
#like itll be busted as fuck because ill be freaking out but you bet ill be sobbing my way through verbally drafting an email#ive done it before‚ like im a frustrated crier and once i start crying i cant turn it off so ive had a couple times where i had a breakdown#at work‚ cried about it a lot‚ and my lead pulled me into a meeting room after i calmed down to check in#and as soon as i started talking it just started again so i had to be like 'sorry th-this is just something m-m-my bod-dy does‚ i-i'm calm#m-mentally but i just c-cant turn this-is off‚ just try to i-ignore HIC it and f-f-focus-s on the w-wwwords‚#(tired of crytyping so just mentally fill it in yourself in everything else i say)#n they offered me more time to chill but im like no really i genuinely am calm‚ i calm down wayyy before my body does its gonna#keep doing this on and off all day‚ it takes hours for it to fully calm down and is on a hair trigger the entire time#so thinking about this will make it kick back up again no matter what unless we talk tomorrow‚ so if youre ok with bearing with me then cool#and theyre like. dang ok and just focused on what i said#or much more recently i was talking to my roommate‚ stopped‚ held up a finger + stood there silently for ten seconds‚#then was like 'sorry about that‚ i think i have to throw up. excuse me for a moment. what was that? oh gotcha yeah i'll message you if i#need anything‚ thank you'#and just typing it out like that it sounds like i was fine and just saw it coming a ways away. however that is not the case#i had had my covid booster and some other vaccine earlier that day‚ lost 5 vials of blood‚ eaten Nothing‚ drank only#acidic-ass apple juice‚ and had just hit my vape too hard#keeping it in once it made its presence known was a feat of will the likes of which have never been seen before#and still my sentences prevail
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lol crying headcanons??
Ponyboy Curtis
He is a quiet crier
Like he just sits with his mouth slightly open and his eyes shut for a moment before he just lets out the quietest, most pitiful sob you’ve ever heard
He’s very sniffly and gaspy when he cries
I feel like he’s the type to apologize for crying because he has a toxic mindset when it comes to emotions
“I’m sorry, I *gasp* don’t know wh- *gasp* what happened, I…”
He can’t even finish his thoughts
He kinda likes to be held when he cries. He never openly admits it but the gang knows he just likes to be hugged so he can bury his face in someone’s shoulder
NEVER cries in public. Ever.
He waits until he gets home and locks himself in his room
Sodapop gets to him the fastest in terms of calming down. Darry is still learning but he’s Pony’s second best bet
He always cries after a nightmare. Every single time.
Soda wakes up almost every night to Pony’s face buried in his chest while he just trembles and he feels his chest getting wet with tears and snot
He doesn’t mind at all
One time Pony actually went to Darry and nearly scared the shit out of him until Darry realized it was just Pony
Hes very hiccupy too when he cries
Sodapop Curtis
Oh my god, the loudest crier you’ll ever hear
He sounds like he’s being strangled when he cries (out of sadness or anger at least)
Hes a huge bawl baby. I’m sorry. Even as a baby he constantly screamed and cried.
When he’s genuinely sad he literally just dinks to his knees. He’s not even trying to be dramatic. It’s like everything is weighing on his so hard he can’t stand up
When he’s angry crying that’s when you know he’s on the verge of yelling. He only goes off on Pony and Darry one time and it was directly after the death of their parents because Pony said something downright nasty to Darry about how if it weren’t for his birthday their parents would be alive and Darry shoots back with if Pong used his head more maybe they wouldn’t have had to go back for it
And Soda just bursts into tears and blows up
“SHUT THE FUCK UP! BOTH OF YOU! YOU DONT FUCKING TALK LIKE THAT ON MY PARENTS NAMES! YOU DONT FUCKING DO THAT! THEIR DEATHS WERE NEITHER OF YOUR FAULTS SO DONT YOU DARE FUCKING SAY THAT! DONT SAY THEIR GODDAMN NAMES IF YOURE JUST GONNA USE THEM IN YOUR ARGUMENTS! DONT EVER SAY THEIR FUCKING NAMES AGAIN!”
Pony and Darry just go quiet because Soda is standing there trembling like a chihuahua, tears streaking down his cheeks, his blonde hair a mess and his cheeks red as he quietly gasps for air and hiccups between words
That was the only time he ever really fully angry cried
When he happy cries he’s a straight up delight
His cheeks get all rosy and he has this big smile and he just lets out a mic between a laugh and a sob as he gathers whoever made him happy enough to cry in a bone crushing hug
Hes genuinely a pretty crier (fuck him honestly like stop being pretty for two seconds god)
His cheeks get all red and his brown eyes get all glimmery. He’s straight out of a fucking soap opera I swear
Bro uses up all his fuel crying. Whatever emotion it is afterwards he’s always like “Darry I want food :/“
Darry Curtis
Darry like…never cries. Ever.
But honestly? When he does cry he’s having a full blown mental breakdown or something has to happen to make him cry
In the book, Pony kinda said his chest shook when he sobbed and I kinda see that happening
He tends to tremble a lot when he cries. His hands get all shaky. That’s usually the first indicator he’s working himself up.
Second indicator is that his legs start bouncing and he starts pacing like a caged animal
Then he just starts sobbing. And it’s rough.
Like in the book I feel like when Pony came back he just ended up holding Pony in a bear hug while he ugly cried into Pony’s shoulder
He’s kind of a mess when he’s crying
He tries to soothe himself but honestly it doesn’t really work. So Sodapop takes over for a bit.
Soda knows exactly what to do and post book, Pony starts helping more too
Soda is the one to ground Darry when he cries. He’ll hold Darry, rub his back, rub his neck, play with his hair, whatever
Pony is more vocal. He helps bring Darry back to reality because usually Darry’s crying bouts come from anxiety and things from the past that pop up and give him a hard time
Pony knows all the breathing exercises and tends to help Darry out a lot with regulating breathing
Darry honestly just needs alone time after he cries. He cries so hard sometimes he just needs to go to sleep after
When this happens, Soda and Pony will do little things around the house. They fold the laundry, wash the dishes, one time they even deep cleaned his truck
They also leave little notes of envouragment around where they know Darry will see it. That also helps calm him down.
maybe i’ll make a pt 2 lol
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NOTHING MATTERS — op81
pairing: oscar piastri x fem! engineering intern! reader
summary: the best way to get over someone who broke your heart is to get under someone else and (unintentionally) break theirs. / inspired by nothing matters by the last dinner party, listen on spotify here !
style: primarily written with a single smau element at the end.
warnings: 18+, minors do not interact, smut, unprotected sex ((p in v) please wrap it before you tap it)), oral (m! receiving) finger sucking, sub/don undertones but nothing serious, i swear on my life oscar piastri is a grunt and groaner but simultaneously considerably vocal during sex (i will die on that rock), afab! reader, readers kinda uncaring about who she hurts because she’s hurt, reader is referred to as she/her, miscommunication trope, oscar piastri has been in love with reader since the beginning of the season and just assumed one-sided pining. authors refusal to write with capitals, you can pry them out of her cold dead hands.
faceclaim: sofia dirado, although feel free to imagine reader as anyone else.
word count: 4.1k +
YOU WERE NO STRANGER TO HEARTACHE.
you fear it followed you around more often than not, like a dark cloud that covered your entire existence in this bubble of heartbreak that nothing ever felt good to you, nothing was ever worth it. from your parents divorcing after years of suffering in a loveless marriage to every single relationship you’d ever been in never making past the first time you sleep together — you’ve genuinely felt about giving up on life, going so far as to consider a life as a celibate nun or maybe not, perhaps just the life of a girl who burns through multiple packs of AA batteries using her rose toy.
however, when you’d met levi, your first year of finally being allowed to leave the mclaren technology centre to shadow tom stalland during the 2023 f1 season. you genuinely thought this man had reshaped your entire perspective of love, he made love easy, made loving him feel less like a sport and more like a hobby you could never get sick of, being with hom felt like you’d been going through all the “firsts” all over again, like a cheesy romance movie monologue.
and yet, here you are, sat in your hotel room after the japan gp, suzuka has always been your favourite gp to watch and unfortunately for some reason, instead of standing in the mclaren garage doing your job, you’re sat clad in your team clothes (a stark contrast to the white bed linen) and sobbing over a text message paragraph explicitly telling you that levi has decided to break up with you after he fell in love with someone else during the summer break, someone who “rewired his brain chemistry in a ways you could never do.” you want to get angry, you wish you were an angry person, instead when you got angry you cried, when you got too happy or even just laughed too hard you cried, you were a crier.
your heart is heavy, as you scroll through the other woman’s posts, she’s gorgeous, and that’s where you begin your myriad of self deprecating comparisons of you to her. you doom scroll for what feels like forever until you spiral even further down the heartbreak rabbit hole, your attention drawn to the fact that levi had both unfollowed and removed you as a follower at some point between when he said goodnight and then broke up with you the next day. you watch as stories of their summer break spent together is shared and your jealousy sends you into a blind rage that you block the both of them; because ultimately you knew that he will hold her life he used to hold you — for levi was boring, a one trick pony you’re only just now coming to terms with.
your disheveled appearance and self imposed seclusion from the events of the day were not left unnoticed, you’d resigned yourself to just stand on the outskirts, occasionally moving to sit down and watch the screens as the friday practice begun, you’re uninterested, unmotivated and trying your dandiest to not cry, for the sole reason of simultaneously not wanting to draw unwanted attention to yourself and the fact that the mascara you’re bought at the duty free at the airport was most definitely not waterproof.
the good thing was that you’d be in japan for the rest of the weekend, the worse thing was you knew not s language lick of the language — sure you could probably call someone an idiot in japanese thanks to the sheer amount of one piece you’d watched eith levi during days he didn’t want to do anything you had planned or suggested; however, the single knowledge of know the word idiot in japanese will not get her very far. you’re almost too zoned out to notice the first free practice had finished, oscar’s team engineer tom standall dismisses you, tells you that whatever happened before you came to track is to be sorted out before it potentially jeopardises a race and without a word or argument against hai decision you shuffle out of the garage and into the paddock.
“name, hey wait — wait up” a voice you’ve only heard considerable muffled by a racing helmet and through large oversized noise cancelling team gear headphones when you got to play pretend engineer whenever it was during his practice laps and his qualifying laps, it sends a shiver up your spine, always has and you’re unknowing if it always will.
“oscar? hey! you did so good today, from what i say, p3 is so awesome how are you not more elated about that!” you’d found yourself smiling, wide across your face and sinking into the gentle rhythm of the conversation with oscar. the smile he returns is equally as wide as if his whole face were smiling, you want to punch him — the cuteness aggression playing devil on your shoulder.
“oh nah, i am actually it just hasn’t like kicked in gully yet, i’m waiting for the full body visceral reaction i’m about to have,” he pauses for a brief moment, hands itchy to fiddling with something snd find solitude in dragging one hand after the other through his tangled and sweaty hair. “like just, honestly, jesus christ and in japan of all places fuckin’ hell” he seems both simultaneously out of breath and ready to compete in a marathon.
had it not been a considerably formal setting you swore you can picture him jumping up and down on the spot whilst trying to contain all of his excitement, you allow him to be excited not wanting your own mood and misery to overshadow his complete and utter elation at his podium win. it’s the first time in the few days you’d been moping about that the smile you give off reaches your eyes and oscar’s always paying attention to these things, unbeknownst to you of course.
“your excitement is infectious, surely the team have planned something celebratory for you! you’ve gotta celebrate this i’m sure lando is!” you can’t help but practically beam, you’re mesmerised by the excitement the unashamed amount of happiness this boy is oozing and the bitter feeling in your stomach over it all is just barely going by unnoticed.
oscar shakes his head, overs a tiny shrugs and barely gets another word into the conversation you teo ate having before he’s whisked away by the team to be dragged off towards the podium, you watch as he shakes the bottle of champagne onto lando and max. any and all brief untouched moments of happiness are immediately replaced when your phones buzzes, a notification alert from your ring door bell and the video supplied of your now ex boyfriend grabbing whatever stuff he’d left at your apartment. the situation just breaks your heart even further than when with the whole of the mclaren team being called upon for s group shot with both the boys and their podium wins you ignore it and decided you’d had enough of it all.
the hotel’s quiet as you tap your keycard against the inside of your hand waiting for the elevator to come back down, the traffic from the track back to the designated hotel meant you’d wound up leaving just as all the other drivers had and whilst you weren’t in the mood to face anymore interactions you were lucky to bypass the small group of fans loitering in the hotel lobby. the elevator itself is slow, like most and the way your stomach drops at the incline is almost akin to how you felt when you’d first received that break up text at the start of the week.
if there was one thing you were thankful for, it was the fact the hotel had a bar just off the lobby, which is where you’d found yourself, skirt a little too short, shoes a little too high and too the perfect amount of booby that you won’t get in too much trouble but also attract someone willing to take away the ache in your chest for the night.
you’d been sat at the bar for just under an hour, occasionally chatting to some of the other patrons but mostly the bartender herself; the paper straw mushy and impossible to drink out of sits on a napkin as you sip on the glass uncaring or the lipstick mark on the rim or the smudging it does to your own lipstick — in fact you’re hoping something else smudges the lipstick further if the night doesn’t continue to progress as slowly as it is.
“can i get a beer, whatever you’ve got in the bottle and another one of what she’s drinking” there it is again, the chill on your spine and the heightened sense of the hand that brushes past your ear to give the bartender a bank card. every single nerve ending in your body is on fire when the stool beside you in moved and a body now begins to occupy it, perhaps you’re a bit drunk, you’d already had two of these and what if the different alcohol consumption laws you’re unsure how much alcohol is actually in the fruity little cocktail you’d ordered.
“oscar piastri, i thought i told you to go celebrate your podium with lando, why are you still at the hotel?” there is is, a tone you’d never thought you’d use with someone who wass essentially your bosses boss, which therefore makes him your boss, and yet here you are — sultry tone and lips loosened by the alcohol in your system, shamelessly flirting with him.
“well, you see, i’m more of a pub person than i am someone who prefers nightclubs and being touched and bumped into by random strangers, i fear that’s more of a lando thing than my own” oscar laughs, the way he’s relaxed and carefree shows signs he did however, get roped into pregaming with lando beforehand, the neck of the beer bottle sits between his index and middle fingers, a comfortable position one you're sure would feel weird if you so much as tried to mimic.
you fear you're done for when it comes to watching the way his throat bobs as he takes a swig of the larger, it's a japanese brand one you've never heard of nor tried and you can tell oscar hasn't by the way his nose scrunches at the taste, he still continues to drink it though. time seems to float by, growing continually more comfortable with one another to the point you'd sauntered away from the bar stools and are sat perhaps not even an inch apart in a booth in the corner.
"favourite race destination, so far?" "monaco. most definitely, melbournes a close second, but that's just because of a personal bias" "personal bias?" "yeah. . . you."
you'd never thought to combine the flavours of japanese beer and strawberry liqueur, and yet here you were, back-pressed and arched up against the wall beside a hotel room that not yours, the elevator ride was one stop too long to have it be that you'd gone back to your hotel room, hands, not your own, are roaming places never thought to be touched, the bluntness of their nails digging into the soft flesh of your thighs has your separating from the kiss to lean your head back and full indulge in the simple pleasures received in this moment. arousal builds when soft lips find the pulse point in your neck, your choice signature scent perfume the most aromatic in that area brings a subconscious reaction from oscar, the thigh between your legs juts up and you also convulse right then and there, your own hands ove from holding the back of his neck to drag through his soft, product-free hair, tugging on the last few strands that slip through your fingers.
the beep of the room door unlocking pulls you to your senses, and a hand tight around your waist drags you inside, you cling onto him in the worst way possible, you can see the smudges of lipstick on the corners of his mouth and god, does he look beautiful. you're unsure for a moment, even if the alcohol had loosened you up a little, you still didn't know how to react around oscar, he's looking at you in a way you can't describe, it makes your stomach flip and you're eager, thighs clenching to distribute the friction of your building arousal. you want his lips on yours again, there's zero space between you, you're simply sharing each other's breath.
his hand finds the back of your neck, tangled in your darkened locks and pulls you back in for a kis, is soft, he must moisturise your brain supplies before it fizzes out, the kiss is messy, all teeth, tongues and spit. you whimper into the kiss, knees buckling, your own hands are on a mission sliding under the hem of his shirt to perfectly feel the warmth that radiates off his skin against your cold hands, you can feel the exact moment your cold touch makes him hiss into the kiss and it finally ignites the fire in your stomach. this is what you want.
you two remain lip-locked until your chest hurts and you've traded the same breath back and forth that it's completely died, when you pull away, you finally take notice of the blown-out pupils staring down at you. his a look entirely of lust, desire, arousal and it shows, especially with the bulge in his pants. your bottom lip finds sanctuary in between your teeth when you raise an eyebrow and one of your hands slips out from under his shirt to palm him through the cargo shorts he'd donned to wear.
if oscar's voice sent a shiver down your spine, the way he groaned at your touch against his bulge chilled you from the inside out, the noise rough and gravelly like he'd not uttered a word in weeks, it's deep and low in his chest that you wouldn't have heard it if you weren't practically flush against him. your hand continues to palm him, making riskier moves as your other hand moves to dip your fingers into the waistband of his pants, you don't wait, you don't even need to ask for permission when his own hands are practically shucking off his own clothes for you.
he looks so gorgeous standing right in front of you, the wet patch you can only assume of precum on the front of his boxers has you licking your lips involuntarily, you try to ignore the voices, fight the urgers but you're but a simple girl, eager to please, that you're flicking your gaze up at him as your sink to your knees, the carpet is soft enough against you but you know better and are already seeing the red marks you'll have the next morning.
oscar looks confused for you in the briefest of moments, your nails dragging along his thighs, soft blonde hairs tickle your finger tips and you bite back the sweet giggle you want to let out as you're finally tugging his underwear down. a moment of shock halts your movement, eyes flicking up and down between oscar's gaze and his cock, tip pink, throbbing and leaking — it's a sight to be seen and you're the one who gets to gaze upon it.
your hand wraps around him, fingers barely meeting at the girth and you moan, can feel the saliva pooling in your mouth, your oral fixation working into overdrive, a single flick of your wrist has a louder groan rolling out of oscar's mouth, a quick "fuck" followed after it that as you once again clenching your thighs. your hand sets an easy rhythm, tried and true, one that allows for long strokes at a steady pace and your thumb to swipe between the slit on his tip that has his stomach clenching. his own hand grabs at your hair, both for something to hold onto and to keep it out of our face when you inch closer and allow your tongue to tease his tip with small kitten licks.
"fuck, fuck, name, fuck suck my cock"
the verbalised plea is all you need to finally wrap your lips around the swollen head, the saltiness of his precum mixing with your spit as you moan around him, your tongue swirls around his tip every time you pull back, only to resume bobbing your head and matching the movement of your hand to the pace you set as you take more of him in your mouth, your mouth feels so full and you can practically feel his dick pulse against your tongue when your other hand moves to squeeze his balls.
"holy shit — where did you learn that, fucking hell"
you smile when you pull away, uncaring of the drool that rolls down your chin, oscar seems not to mind either when he's pulling you back up to kiss him, your hand still stroking him slowly. he can taste his pre cum still on your tongue and as someone who'd assumed he wouldn't be fond of the idea, seems more or less enjoying it solely because it's coming from your mouth. his tongue overpowers your own and he's licking in your mouth with such severity that you can feel your own wetness pooling in your panties, had you been horny before you were now basically unbearably horny at this point.
your clothes feel bothersome, and your top and bra come off rather quick once your legs meet the edge of the bed you'd been pushed back against. the cool air of the hotel room meets your nipples and you gasp out once oscar's hot mouth chooses to settle on one and his hand favours the other. it's magic, that's what you can choose to blame it on, with the way oscar's fingers tug and twist one nipple all whilst his mouth and suck away on the other, your back arches up against him when his teeth graze the sensitive bud and you swear you could achieve your first orgasm of the night just from that alone.
his mouth switches to give the same treatment to the other nipple and yours that tug and pull on his hair only urge him on more, whining and desperate and what you want to happen is not happening. you need him, you crave him, you desire him.
"please oscar, fuck me"
there is it, the words oscar had been waiting to hear since you'd kissed him, and who would oscar be if not someone who listened when he was asked to do something. he sits up on his knees, jerks himself a couple of times as he watches you, skirt rugged up to your hips, a perfect picture, a sight for sore eyes, so beautiful, all for him to bare witness too. you back arches, your eager and needy and positively soaked you don't even need to touch yourself to know, your panties are finally pulled off and you hiss at the air that hits your center. you're clenching around nothing, sticky and sweet, eager, he looks up as your and you nods a final confirmation before you supply a weak "please" before his tip is aligning with your entrance and he's sliding in.
the stretch is everything to you, he is perfect, your hand stretching splayed out against the pillow as the tiniest whine falls from your lips, oscar grunts, face and chest flushed, you can hear exactly how we you are just from the squelch when he finally bottoms out and you moan loud enough that if anyone had been walking past the room they would have heard. oscar doesn't move, allowing for your pussy to stretch and get comfortable around him before you nod, rolling your hips to signal him to move and move he does.
"you're so tight, holy shit."
his hips rock back and forth into you, it's slow and sensual something you hadn't expected, your legs shift and wrap around his hips and your body rocks back against his thrusts willing him to move faster. unlike past partners, oscar seems to get the hint almost instantly as he pulls out and shifts slightly, hand holding onto your hips before he's sheathed himself back into you entirely in a singular thrust.
you moan out, toes curling and your legs wrapping around him so tight as if you'd practically become some sex-fueled boa constrictor. you swear his muscles are working overtime as his abdomen flexes with every deep thrust inside you, your body abuzz with electricity, the fire in your stomach scorching as a particular thrust has him hitting your g-spot and your back arching receptively.
in a world where you'd thought this was ever possible, all imaginations and scenarios have proven wrong already as oscar's thumb finds solace on drawing circles on your clit, causing your pussy to clench around him and a hiss to drag itself from his lips. to oscar you feel amazing and the flush on your face perfect evidence of his inability to be shy about telling you so and all you can do is ooh and ahh in return. something pulls in your stomach when he bottoms out in you again, your leg twitches and you're hyperaware that you'd just orgasmed around him, vocalising how it feels and your back arching however, his hips remain relentless only to come to a halt as he pulls out; your words are stopped as you're flipped over with a gentle tap against your thigh.
arms stretched out in front of you and your back arched, give oscar the perfect view to just take a moment to stare at your fluttering pussy, clenching around nothing as you suffer through a partially stunted orgasm. fingers drag through your folds and your body jerks at the sensitivity, the dip between them, pumping in and out similar to the rhythm he kept previous, his middle finger hooks and your face is thrown forward into the pillow as it hits the spongey feel of your g-spot, you gasp out hand white-knuckling the pillow as he focusses his fingers on that one particular spot
"fuck osc – fuck want you back inside me"
you don't bother with caring much about how whiney and desperate you'd begun to sound, throat dry from the gasping and the continuous noises he pulls from you, your tempting him, ass swaying as he chuckles, pulling his fingers out, he coo's at you as you whine to mourn the loss of the feeling, teases you as he slips the tip of his dick through your flushed red folds and bottom out with a quick hard thrust. you scream out, the pleasure perfectly combining with the sudden stretch to make the sweetest mixture of pain and pleasure you'd ever felt and to silence you, the fingers he'd just fucked you with had found the way into your mouth and if there was one thing you were, it was a good girl.
the sounds reverberating around the walls of the hotel room are borderline pornographic, the new pace oscar has set, deep and hard, skin slapping against skin as he practically bounces off you, his free holding your hip steady as your own knees buckle and you can feel the way his dick pulses inside you, the way his movements become sloppy yet still hitting your pleasure spot every time. the fingers in your mouth licked clean of your own arousal now replaced to be covered in your own drool. oscar grunts, his hips snapping against you in a final thurst as he slumps forward to press the most delicate of kisses to the nape of your neck as he feels you up and you cum around him for a second time.
it's messy, whatever hadn't spilt inside you now jerked off onto your back as your knees give out and you slump against the bed. worn out and woozy you're hardly paying attention to oscar cleaning up, the warm washcloth drags along your hot, sticky and sweaty skin in a way that twists your brain and brings out the regret that seeps into your stomach, had your legs not been feeling like they weren't attached to your body you would have scrambled to get dressed and done the walk of shame back to your own hotel room; however, you stay, regretfully.
you don't cuddle, oscar tries not to act hurt about it as you roll over and away from him when he finally climbs in himself. to you this didn't matter, you fucked him, like nothing matters. come the morning you'll be gone before he wakes. because this didn't mean a thing. to you as least.
yourusername just posted . . . ♫ nothing matters . the last dinner party
liked by lando.jpg, yourbestfrienduser, lolatung and 11,219 others yourusername and i will fuck you, like nothing matters. load more comments
oscarpiastri oh.
authors note: please excuse my smut skills, i'm rusty a lil ngl. i love a bittersweet ambiguous ending. if this gets enough recognition and asks, i'll definitely more than likely make a part two or even multiple parts. reminder, if you weren't tagged it means i couldn't find your account.
add yourself to the taglist here !
taglist: @iluminaya @therealcap @marshmummy @@im-an-overthinker @a1leexxa @chasing-liberosis @marauderssworld @nesssywrites @valntynebaby @larastark3107 @justtprachisblog
#𐙚 paige’s works#oscar piastri x you#oscar piastri#oscar piastri x reader#oscar piastri fic#oscar piastri imagine#oscar piastri smau#oscar piastri smut#f1 x reader#f1 x you#f1 imagines#formula one x reader#formula one x you#formula one imagines
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Hazard NSFW Alphabet!!
18+ MDNI. Enjoy all under the cut ;)
A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)
This man cares SO much. He will spend a few moments with you to take a breath. He runs his hand up and down your back, feels his fingers through your hair, kisses your forehead, everything. Once the two of you have caught your breath, he helps you to the bathroom to clean up. Probably smacks your butt after too.
B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)
Of yours? Hazard is a thigh man through and through. He loves your thighs and stomach. Even when the two of you aren't getting freaky, he uses your thighs as pillows. He loves loves loves to grab at them and bite them. He's a happy man with your thighs around his head.
He personally loves his arms and chest. Mostly because he sees you staring at them constantly. This fucker doesn't wear a shirt for a reason. Holds you tight against him with his arms and presses you into place with his torso.
C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)
This is where he's a bit conflicted. Hazard is a messy man by nature, but if he can cum inside you, that's what he's doing. I think it would depend on how the two of you are feeling.
D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)
Hazard secretly wants you to collar him and ride him until he can't think. This man aims to please. He's a service top but he would be lying if he said he didn't want you to take control and take care of him. However, this requires a lot of trust for him. Only once hes fully comfortable in your relationship will he admit this to you.
E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)
Oh he knows what he's doing. Although, I feel like by the time he joins the Phreaks and enters a relationship with you, it's been a hot minute. But the longer you're in a relationship, the more he knows how to get you shaking.
F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)
I'm not gonna lie... Full Nelson. Purely because he's strong enough to lift you like that. Ties into why he likes his arms and chest. He's freaky, he wants to try some interesting positions with you. But when hes feeling more intimate he likes to face you. Cowgirl, good ol missionary, anything. He wants to see you and kiss you.
G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)
Two sides. As mentioned before, he can be either pretty freaky or pretty intimate. Usually he is more teasing than goofing around.nWhen he's more sentimental, he's not cracking as many jokes.
H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)
I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)
Hazard is definitely hairy. It's a little wild down there but he still likes to be hygienic and trimmed.
J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)
He can get very intimate and sentimental. I think he can be a bit of a crier because he just cares SO much. Like yeah, he's a big tough guy with piercings and tattoos and muscles, but love really softens him. Hazard can fuck you and love you.
K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)
😮💨 He jacks off a lot. Whether you're there or not. Likes to tease you and be a little loud if you're in the other room, makes sure you can hear him. Definitely likes to make you watch sometimes too. If you're not there, he gets whiny. He just wants you so bad.
L = Location (favorite places to do the do)
Whew don't even get me started. First of all, he bites. Sometimes it's just grazing you with his teeth, other times he just bites you. He loves to see the marks on you.
He also loves the size difference. That's undeniable. He can't get enough of how big and strong he is compared to you and how useful that is in the bedroom.
M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)
As freaky as he is, he actually prefers to stay in the bedroom. He won't venture outside your home.
N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)
This man is so horny for you. Standing next to you and looking down at you gets him thinking. When he's touching you in any way, he's biting his lip. You have a beast on your hands.
O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)
Mentioned before, but he wouldn't do anything in public. Makes him uncomfortable he doesn't want to risk anyone seeing him or you in that way.
P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)
Hazard is a huge giver. He loves to give and please you. He's fucking good at it too. But! He can't deny how much he loves to see your lips around his cock. He gives and gives but once he receives, he is absolutely mush.
Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)
He can be rough and/or fast. He knows how to move his hips and he knows how to get your body reacting to him. He likes to be slow on purpose sometimes to tease you and get you to beg.
R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)
Hazard loves a good quickie. Not very often, usually just when he's wanting you before a mission with the Phreaks. He much prefers to spend his time with you if he can, but he doesn't mind a quickie when that's all there's time for.
S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)
Ohhh yea. He's always asking you about trying things. Hazard loves to experience new things, and if you're comfortable with it, he's gonna make it happen. This man is SO FREAKY.
T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)
Come on. He's young, he's built, he's jumping around constantly, he has modifications, etc. Hazard could go all fucking night. He stops when you want to stop. His stamina is unparalleled.
U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)
Yes yes yes. This ties into the experimentation. He prefers to not use them, but when they are being used, boy does he enjoy himselfm
V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)
Hazard LOVES to tease you. He's kinda just an annoying little shit. Slows his pace to make you beg, bites you, smacks your ass, says things to shock you and make you blush, the whole course. He even likes to be teased. He lives for the banter between you.
W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)
At first he's quiet and tries not to be loud, but after a while he just allows himself to feel good. Grunts and groans and the occasional whine. He can tell you enjoy when he's vocal too.
X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)
(I can't think of anything I feel like I have stated it all before, I'm sorry 😭)
Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)
Hooo boy. He's big. And he's thick. I'm thinking around 7 inches.
Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)
Mentioned before, but he is always wanting you. Literally the smallest things get him hard. He can deal with it himself if you aren't in the mood, though.
Once the two of you are calmed down and cleaned up, he's out like a light. Immediately knocked out and snoring. Probably falls asleep mid conversation if you two are talking lmao.
I hope you enjoyed!! I kept accidentally posting this I apologize but here is the final product! I really enjoyed doing this, it was quick and fun and worked my headcannon brain. Except for the wildcard one, I genuinely couldn't think of anything 😭
#hazard#hazard overwatch#overwatch#findlay docherty#overwatch hazard#findley docherty#overwatch 2 hazard#overwatch 2
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Could would Lotor, Shiro, Keith and Zarkon (separately) react to finding out that the males of their boyfriend's (m!readers) species can get pregnant? M! reader's species is basically a cat-human hybrid. I don't care if it's smut or fluff.
(feel free to take off Keith or Shiro if there are to many characters)
—❢—
×A/N×
Hey, Anon!
I'm sorry for taking this too long!
The characters are kinda ooc, but I hope it's acceptable!
I wanted to make this as fluff, but I put some spice in it. Don't worry, it's safe.
Although, I have to admit-
I'm a Lotor simp
×❢ About my work ❢×
ooc, fluff, smut, male reader, cat human hybrid reader, no pronouns used for the reader, no proofread
Fandom: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Character(s): Takashi "Shiro" Shirogen, Keith Kogane, Prince Lotor, Emperor Zarkon, You| (Y/N) |The Reader
Ship(s): The characters x You| (Y/N) |The Reader
Form: Headcanons
—❢ー
𝐋𝐨𝐭𝐨𝐫, 𝐒𝐡𝐢𝐫𝐨, 𝐊𝐞𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐙𝐚𝐫𝐤𝐨𝐧 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐠𝐧𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐌𝐚𝐥𝐞! 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫
[Credit goes to the creators of the gifs!]
Takashi "Shiro" Shirogen
• he is actually pretty surprised
• firstly, because you are a male and you're pregnant
• but don't worry, he traveled through the galaxy and he saw weirder stuff than this
• secondly, he didn't believe that the pregnancy test will be possitive and you guys made it!
• like you came up to him and told that the pregnancy test was possitive and he was like "What's that, hon?"
• BUT YOU GUYS MADE IT! And this is what matters. And ofc the baby's health too, but you get my point
• so it was kind of a good surprise for him
• he's not so crazy about it
• Actually, he never had a crazy, energetic personality, so that's normal from him.
• but he will do his best to keep you and the baby healthy
• he'll also sit down and just talk softer when he's around your belly
• he'll be ONE OF THE most cheesy ones
• also, he won't like it, when others are cursing around you bc of the baby
• HE'S SO DAD!! (I mean he's the dad of the Team Voltron, so what did u expect? -)
Keith Kogane
• he'll just stand there and say "... What?"
• Even if he doesn't show any sign of excitment, you know that he's happy about it.
• You two WILL have serious conversations about he can be a good father, and yes, you know that you're two are ready for this child.
• will be more protective around you than ever
• he's afraid that the baby will get infected by Lance
• "Stop it, you'll make my child(ren) stupid."
"Oh, like you would be any smarter."
"I am."
• 3 months after you've revealed to him that you're pregnant, he have finally accepted that he is ready to be a great and ideal father to your child(ren). He placed your palm into his. "You know... I was thinking, (Y/N)... Maybe... Maybe you're right. I can be a good father to our child(ren)." he looked up at you with a determined sparkle in his eyes. "And I'm so ready for it."
• he's not a big crier, but this will be definitely bring his emotional side out. But just for you and your baby(s) only
Prince Lotor
• ♪ he knows, he knows, and I know he knows ♪
• okay, but seriously, when you mentioned that the test was positive, he'll just stand there and smirk at you and say
• "I already know that, Darling."
• and he also knows that he's happy about it
• definitely that type of person, who already has a whole construction plan of the baby's room
• he'll probably kiss your belly at sex
• also, I think it would turn him onthat how sensitive you are
• "Oh my..." he laughs at your whimpers. He did nothing yet. All he did was just touching your chest with his cold fingertips. And you are already beneath the plesure as you begging him for more. "You're so sensitive for me, Dear."
• He tries to spend as much time with you and the baby as he can. He doesn't want to give your child the same parenthood, like his was. He wants to be better, than his father.
Emperor Zarkon
(Mind if I do past Zarkon? As the Black Lion's paladin? I hope you don't mind it-)
• he could already sense that you're pregnant, so he wasn't so surprised
• though, he was still happy with you
• in the Garla Empire it's quite dangerous to have a child, don't you think so?
• but don't worry, he'll watch out for you
• IS the other cheesy one
• he'll just knee down and kiss your belly while asking "So, how's my babygirl / my big boy?"
• he had some doubt if he could be good father, but he swallowed it quickly
• i mean you chosed him. If he wasn't a good father figure for your beautiful child(ren), why would you choose him, right?
• i would say that he treats you like a prince —just like his son—, he does that everyday so-
• but after all, he's really greatful to have a child (or more) with you, and he's more than ready to be the father of your child(ren)!
#voltron x reader#voltron#voltron legendary defender#zarkon x reader#keith kogane#vld zarkon#prince lotor#vld lotor#keith kogane x reader#lotor x reader#takashi shirogane#shiro x reader#vld x reader#vld shiro#vld
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KINKTOBER DAY 20 — PHONE SEX
PAIRING: sub!beomgyu x fem!reader
GENRE/CW: smut, slight dacryphilia, usage of nicknames (pup), guided masturbation, gyu is needy and desperate.
WC: 0.8k words
WARNING: 18+ content, minors dni
A/N: hihi, angels! gyu is literally my favourite sub omg, i hope you all enjoy reading this :3 all likes, comments, reblogs and feedbacks are highly appreciated! iloveyou all <33
✎ kinktober masterlist

“God, I wish you were here, Gyu.”
The distress was clear on his face, a sweet pout settling on his glossy lips as he whined, tears forming in his eyes, making them look sparklier than usual, big and pleading for you to help him.
He knew that you’d be back in a week, but it’s too long for the poor pup, who can’t go a day without being in your arms, listening to your sweet praises and proud smile. And right now, he’s heartbroken because he can’t feel your warmth next to him.
It doesn’t help that you’re wearing his favourite lipstick, the one he loves to be marked up with, sitting in a hotel room, all naked yet not giving him the access to see anything more than your cleavage on the FaceTime call.
“Be a good pup, Gyu. Touch yourself for me, hm?” Your voice comes out smooth, eliciting a whimper out of him.
He looks beautiful, keeping his phone upright and stable, letting you get the full view of his milky soft skin and leaking cock, which he fucks using his fist, thrusting his hips up pathetically, the sight so beautiful you couldn’t help but touch yourself, hiding the view from Gyu.
He wanted to see you, he wanted to touch you, please you. He couldn’t, and that had him trembling, gripping the sheets with his free hands, doing all you ordered him to, just to have a glimpse of your body.
He’s desperate.
A stray tear left his eyes, cascading down his flushed cheek, lip swollen with how hard he was biting it.
“That’s it, that’s my pretty baby,” you coo, and he smiles shyly, always in need of praise. He loved it when you called him pretty, the red adorning his cheeks made it all worth it.
“Your p—pretty baby,” he managed to speak, hiccuping when you reward him by adjusting the angle of the phone enough for him to see your tits.
You could’ve sworn he started drooling, crying freely now, hating being deprived of your touch, his eyes fixated on your hardened nipples, “m—mommy,” a broken sob left his lips.
“Good pup, show me your pretty little cock now,” you commanded, and he was fast to pick up the phone, bringing it close to his edging cock.
“I need you so bad,” he cried out, thumb playing with his tip, collecting and smearing the leaking cum all over his cock. The sight was beautiful, his lip wobbling, as he begged for more.
He’d always been desperate, trailing behind you like a lost puppy since the day you first fucked him, avoiding eye contact while asking you for more to becoming the neediest little doll for you, pliant and sweet, but can also be bratty when he wants to be punished (which he quite frankly tends to enjoy).
“Two days more, pup. You can wait that much, right?” You asked, eyebrow raised, knowing well he’d shake his head, another tear falling down his cheek.
“C—can’t! I miss you,” he cries and lord, he is a pretty crier.
You smile, praising him for being such a good boy, helping him calm down a little, “use your stuffie, hm? It’ll help you feel better,” you suggest, and he nods fervently.
He doesn’t waste any second, grabbing the little stuffie before he starts humping, moans getting louder as he closes his eyes, trying to envision the stuffie as you instead. It smelled like you, courtesy of your perfume which he sprayed before you left for the trip.
You loved it, just how willing he was to follow all your orders, just to get a glimpse of your body. With his eyes closed now, you found this to be the perfect opportunity to reward your needy pup, settling the phone a little far, enough to show your body on the screen, “open your eyes, baby,” you whispered.
It was a sight for sore eyes.
His eyes widened, heart beating out of his chest when he took you in. Your body glowing under the dim lights of your room, bare and beautiful, all for his eyes. He could barely breathe anymore, having held back himself for so long, and seeing you was his last straw.
His cock twitched uncontrollably, lips parted as he moaned, not caring for the neighbours who would hear him, all he could do was cry out your name, making a mess all over the stuffie he was humping, a few drops of cum reaching his phone as he went limp, too tired to move, still managing to get the phone close to him, just to see you smiling at him proudly.
“Such a good pup, so pretty, all fucked out for me, hm? Gonna reward you when I come back for being so good,” you coo, and he blushes, warmth spreading in his chest.
He couldn’t wait for you to come back.

THANK YOU FOR READING!
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#🎫 — kinktober!#beomgyu smut#txt smut#choi beomgyu smut#kpop smut#sub!beomgyu#beomgyu x reader#txt imagines#txt hard hours#txt fanfic
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Therapy Files 3: Twist the Knife (Carmy)

GIF credit: @mithrandirl
Summary: Carmy’s girlfriend (who he calls Darling) tells him it’s okay to cry after his first day of therapy. (944 Words) FLUFF.
Warnings: Swearing, comfort, hurt, emotional breakdown (crying), fem reader/lass who is a trauma surgeon, she/her pronouns, mention of Donna Berzatto, mention of Mikey Berzatto, mention of Natalie Berzatto, mention of mental and emotional abuse.
Notes: Thank you for reading and sharing! This is a work in the Therapy Files Series and will be tagged with #cb therapy files.
Sideblog for commentary and social stuff: @m-z-shoroi
Post-Day 1
I held it together after day 1 of therapy until we got back to the apartment.
I don't even remember the drive back. I can't remember if I ever looked up or if Darling tried to speak to me. I just blinked and was standing at the bathroom mirror, staring into a face much like my own but with terrified eyes, reddened cheeks, a reddened nose, and a fat lip bearing teeth marks. These oceans of blues and wisps of gray with spidery red blood vessels invading in from the corners of my eyes where a band of reflections grew, and grew, and grew until my eyes snapped shut, until I retreated to the dark quiet, and warm saltwater fell from them.
My teeth hurt, my chest hurt, my fingers ached from how tightly I was gripping the sink. Hurt so bad I thought they might snap under the pressure of my own muscles crushing my fingertips against unforgiving shitty fucking composite—I couldn’t have that; I need my hands to cook—but I couldn’t override my body to make it stop. The ache in my jaw was so intense that I waited for the searing pain of a tooth cracking because surely, one of them would go, right? This is the part of emotions I can’t stand: the lack of control. I had no control. My body was just doing what it wanted to without my consent, and the only choice I had in the matter was how many times I’d cuss out whatever made me like this for it.
Fuck you.
There. Have another one.
I'm not a crier. I don't fucking cry, okay? I couldn't, because if I did, Mikey or ma would twist the knife further or Nat would catch some heat trying to protect me from them or sometimes all of the above. Why are you fucking crying, you baby? You're not a child. Stop fucking crying. Do you see what I did all day for all of you? Am I crying? Then you shouldn't be fucking crying either.
I hate seeing people cry. It twists something deep inside me, under my diaphragm, almost tucked up against my spine. And not because I want to fix it or make them feel better—really, I only have the energy to worry about Nat or Darling feeling better. I can do something for them. They don't reject me, so it can hurt, and I can try to fix it. No, I hate seeing people get to cry. I hate that they can sob like fucking children over the smallest shit and no one, least of all me, tells them that they're being fucking babies. I used to be a human too, you know? Why couldn't people treat me like that? Why do you get to cry, and I don't? Why do I got to hold my shit together?
"Carmy? Baby?”
Shit, and now Darling’s seen me.
I instinctively swiped away the stupid tears, turned my back to her, clawed for the words to explain to her that I was fine, she didn’t see anything. Reflexes baked into my being from too long a lifetime of being chastised for the act of being human. For daring to feel so much emotion that it’d trigger my body’s reflex to cry. That’s the thing—it’s so fucking human to do so, but no one’s ever treated me like a fucking human, have they? I’ve forever only been worthy of consideration when I served a purpose, I’ve forever been a means or a tool until Darling.
That’s the thing about trauma that they don’t tell you, by the way. They do tell you it’s gonna get worse when you try to get better. But how that happens? How worse is actually a thousand little things that all cut you up like glass shards? Nah, they don’t tell you that shit. You go headfirst in the deep end and get water down your throat and in your eyes and you don’t know which way is up and your legs cramp up and then, and then, and then… Sure, you get a better sense of all the shit you’ve survived, and much like the fleeting ten seconds after avoiding wrecking out on the side of the interstate where your heart slams into your throat because you realize how close to death you were, you spiral down into a pit of despair at how much deeper you’re in that you ever realized. You also get less tolerant to more damage. Shit starts to hurt because you’re not numb anymore. The tiniest shit starts to hurt. It’s maddening.
Darling spun me by my shoulders and clasped me in a hug. My hands planted on her ribs of their own accord, intending to push her away.
“Baby, it’s okay!” she hissed.
I froze.
“It’s okay to cry. I’m right here, Carmy. I got you.”
Her cold fingers wove into my hair, tucked my face into the crook of her neck, arm wrapped around my shoulders and yanked me in. She crushed me in a hug, and I caged her in my grip in response. It ripped something raw in my chest, being held so tightly, being held like she wanted me there. Like I wasn’t a waste of space or time or effort. I got you. I had a life ring, for once. I’m the best swimmer I know, but this time, I didn’t have to fight the tide. Darling would keep me from drowning. I clung to her, gasped in a breath, and—without my consent. Emotions never have consent—choked out a sob.
Darling allowed me to cry.
Tags: @jess248 @catharticconsolation @persymons @morgthemagpie @glitch0o0 @nox-is-thename @forgechildofheph @leminjelly @fridavacado @lumoslemon @cyarskj1899 @carmenberzattosgf
#cb therapy files#carmen berzatto#carmen berzatto fanfiction#carmy x reader#carmy berzatto#the bear fanfiction#carmy berzatto fanfiction#carmen berzatto fluff#carmen berzatto x reader
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Outsiders (and twttin) crying hcs because I’m terrible and evil
Darry
- he only cries when he has time to. Like, if he’s busy he will push those feelings down until he isn’t
- when he does actually cry, it’s very quiet. He’s just laying in bed letting the tears stream down his face
Soda
- low key a crybaby. Like he cries even when he’s happy
- blubbery, needs someone around. Like he won’t cry when he’s alone because that’s not what he needs
Pony
- he’s 14 he’s def a bit of a crybaby too. He’s more embarrassed about it than soda
- he, like Darry, wants to be alone and cry when he has time, but he, like soda, emotionally needs the company even if he doesn’t want it
Johnny
- canonly rarely cries. If he does, it’s a big deal
- he’s like empty inside if he’s at that point, probably hugging his knees and hiding away. He’s trying to be quiet too
Steve
- somewhat similar to soda in that he will cry at any extreme emotion, not just sadness. However, he has to be at a much further point than soda does
- he wants to be alone when he cries because he’s embarrassed, but often conversations with soda will pull some tears out that he’s been holding in. Sometimes their hangouts end with soda holding him while Steve just cries
Dally
- he doesn’t cry. He’s too tough to cry (lies)
- he does cry, just not often and certainly not when someone else can see. Usually it’s just a few tears and it’s over, and it’s not for any particular reason.
Twobit
- big baby. He can also fake cry if he needs to
- he ain’t ashamed of his tears, but he won’t cry in front of someone he dislikes or in front of someone he wants to be tough around (like someone younger or something) he will cry in front of his mom though because they have a very open relationship. He’s a mommas boy
Tim
- doesn’t cry, according to himself and also curly and Angela. (Also a lie)
- he won’t cry in front of anyone because he refuses to be weak. But like, it still happens. Usually he’s in bed thinking and he makes himself cry because of that (so me)
Angela
- she has no qualms about crying in front of people, especially her brothers. She has used Tim’s shirt as a tissue and then scolded him for getting his shirt dirty
- she’s a loud crier if she’s with someone, but by herself it’s those silent choking tears that genuinely hurt
Curly
- hates crying but doesn’t have the self control to not cry in front of people. He usually cries when he’s in pain or very very annoyed (maybe Tim and Angela keep pestering him) he doesn’t really cry when he’s sad
- you know those studio ghibli tears? Where they’re round and they just keep coming? That’s him
Bryon
- honestly it would take a lot to make him cry, not because he’s tough, but because it isn’t really thing he ever does. Like he generally just sleeps his feelings off
- if he did cry it’s probably sniffly and gross, and he’s wiping it off on his sleeve and stuff
Mark
- also doesn’t really cry, but that’s more because he’s never really given a reason to, at least not as a teenager
- when he was a kid though he would cry sometimes, probably cuddle up to Bryon’s mom. (That bitch) he’d still get over it fast though.
Cathy
- she cries a lot but not really in front of people unless she knows they can make her feel better.
- she will cry around M&M but not her parents, she will cry with bryon but never around mark. She lets the tears roll down her face as she explains what’s wrong
M&M
- I can’t imagine him crying, but if he did it would be with Cathy because he trusts her and she won’t ever judge him for it
- he leans against her and talks with her as he sniffles and wipes his tears away
#the outsiders#tim shepard#curly shepard#darry curtis#angela shepard#dallas winston#ponyboy curtis#steve randle#sodapop curtis#johnny cade#Cathy Carlson#m&m carlson#bryon douglas#mark jennings#that was then this is now
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SUB LIP AND CARMY LAAAWRD (sorry for rambling my fault yall…)
carmen would be a whiner for sure—he’s a little embarrassed by it but not too much. to me i feel like he’d just wanna be taken care of…..no meanness or teasing just lots of praise. prefers slow grinds that make him tear up bc it’s so good. probably when he has bad days and wants to just have soft mushy gushy lovey dovey sex
now lip (slut) i feel like he rarely subs but that’s because he’s got that internalized ‘macho’ bs implanted in his brain. but when he does he’s probably bitchy saying “want me to take over? probably do it better than you 🤭” and when he stops being so bullheaded it’s all “o-oh, keep fuckin me like that, shhhit s’good”
feel like carmen would love a little edging? not a lot but…because the release is more than just physical it’s kinda emotional for him too? while lip would love overstimulation because it’d be the only thing he could focus on it’d just wipe his brain of all his current worries
oooooooooooooooo lord. oh lord. i need a cold shower.
carmen being a whiny baby is so real. i know he just wants to be taken care of after a long hard day in the kitchen, and he would be so sweet, begging you... 'please baby 's so good' 'f-fuck!' 'shit- 'm gonna come-' and its all strained and he's stuttering... he loves when you edge him, and i mean loves it, he loves to beg and beg and get pushed so close to the edge. and hes a crier, trust. he likes to feel vulnerable and soft with you.
getting lip to submit would be an... ordeal. but i think you can coax him into it. i think tying him up would be good for his giant fucking ego, once you get his ass tied down and start making him feel good he would start to let down that facade he's always putting up. he'd be squirming and begging you to untie him so he can touch you and please you. once you get him like that he would be soooo eager to please you. he would do anything to get you off, eat you out for hours and ask for nothing in return, just asking 'yeah, baby, 's good for you?' 'you can gimme another, wanna make you feel good please' 'am i makin' ya feel good? hm?' and for sure lots of 'thank you, thank you baby' when you praise him for how good he's being.
in conclusion: yes.
#my michelin star [carmy]#southside smartass [lip]#carmen berzatto x reader#carmen berzatto smut#lip gallagher x reader#lip gallagher smut#sub!lip gallagher#sub!lip gallagher x reader#sub!carmen berzatto#sub!carmen berzatto x reader
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IWTV rewatch
Season 1 episode 2 [... After the Phantoms of Your Former Self] - part 3/3
- Love how Grace knows it's not just a case of a baby crying, she knows her brother, she knows her brother is different, she knows he baby could very well be in danger. That's sibling and maternal instincts in one.
[Louis] "'I had him in my arms... And I was ready to tear into him. I'm never gon' get control over it.' [Lestat] 'You've been skipping meals lately. Don't think I haven't noticed.'" - notice how Lestat immediately cares for Louis, worries about him, and tries to comfort him, only for Louis, Saint Louis, to reject the gesture of comfort because he thinks in his self-hatred that he doesn't deserve it? And also notice how pretty a crier Jacob is. Ahem. Who said that.
[Lestat] "'If you love your family, as I know you do, spare them all the pain that you are causing them.' [Louis] 'I ain't gon' have a family of my own, am I? No sons, no daughters.' [Lestat] 'I'm your family, Louis.' [Louis] 'You should just throw me in the incinerator and make another one.' [Lestat] 'And what a waste that would be. I have two centuries walked this Earth and can report: you have no twin. No one as angry, as stubborn, as unaccommodating, as maddening...' [Louis] 'Sounds like trash to me.' [Lestat] '... as loving, as dedicated, as thoughtful, as imperfectly perfect as you've become. You're a challenge every sunset, Saint Louis, and I'd have it no other way.'"
HI EXCUSE ME WHAT GIVES YOU THE RIGHT TO PLAY WITH MY HEART LIKE THAT. No because it's Louis' dream of having a family (Claudiaaaaaaa - also give Lestat like a century or two more and he'll give you exactly that) meeting Louis' depression and self-hatred, meeting Lestat's need to be love, meeting Lestat's absolute, deep love for Louis. They're not speaking the same language still, but they've found a middle ground, and when they do strike the middle ground, it's sparks and magic. Aaaah, it is maddening! They are maddening. I don't even remember what I wanted to say, I'm just sobbing in my cup of tea.
Wait, no I remember. EXCUSE ME. Louis' hopelessly fond smile when Lestat shows the tuxedos and says "I've been neglectful of our romance" (currently sobbing even more) reminded me. Awards for Jacob to go that soft after being that down. Back to the previous exchange. It's about how soft Lestat's voice goes when he tells Louis he'd have him no other way, and it's about how Louis finally lets Lestat comforts him and how he softens, relaxes and calms down gradually as Lestat keeps talking and petting him. *screams* Need I add more? No? Carrying on.
- [Louis] "He had a way about him, those first few years, Lestat. Preternaturally charming, occasionally thoughtful. He was my murdered, my mentor, my lover, and my maker... all of those things at once. He didn't choose me to be his doormat. I knew he enjoyed it when I fought back, but there was present a kind of worship on my part. The earth beneath me always felt liquid."
*screams some more* Was the romantic background music really necessary? We get it. You loved him, you still love him but this time with both eyes open even though you're still in denial, he's the love of your life, we get iiiiiiiiiit. Daniel's fond but amused little smirk gets me. Boy knows vampire's pining. Boy knows vampire's dumb. Boy knows story's not that simple. Changing subject, petition to get the word "preternatural" BANNED please. That's one word I'm not happy to have learned. Even in French we just stick to "surnaturel" (supernatural). Also according to Collins Dictionary, the use of the word "preternatural" was kinda low until the late 70s- early 80s when it exploded. Wonder what happened then to change the trend. What a mystery. Guess we'll never know.
- ghghhghe THE OPERA SCENE. I had forgotten the opera scene. The scheme to get Louis into the room (role-playing as Lestat's valet, hello social commentary). Louis sitting there "simmering in his indignation", and Jacob's masterful acting with the jaw and fists clenching, the steely eyes fixed straight ahead. And then Lestat coming in with the hammer, voice soft and gaze downcasted, timid and apprehensive:
[Lestat] "There is one thing about being a vampire that I most fear above all else... and that is loneliness. You can't imagine the emptiness... a void stretching out for decades at a time. You take this feeling away from me, Louis. We must stay together and take precaution and never part."
I NEED A MINUTE, GEEZ. To comment again on the timeline change from late 18th century to 1910s, it actually adds to Lestat's character. In the books, when Lestat meets Louis, he hasn't been a vampire for more than 15 years, iirc he was brought into the Blood in 1780 and arrived in New Orleans in 1791, after spending some years traveling with Gabrielle, a few months at best sleeping in the sand and then a few days with Marius (dates are vague at best). So he hasn't known true loneliness so far when he turns Louis. Whereas here, he's gone through the entire 19th century alone. He actually knows loneliness, both the human kind that he knew in the book, and the vampire kind. It adds weight to his fear of being alone, and to how he clings to Louis even to the point of doing horrifying things to keep him with him. Is it emotional manipulation? Yeah, def. Mais on n'en est plus à ça prés avec eux (best translation I can come up with is: but we're already way past that with them; the French expression is much more evocative, it kind of means "yeah, but, with them, emotional abuse is the least of our worries, something like that).
The hand caress, be right back, need to set myself on fire.
[Louis] "And music, that was where Lestat separated man from food" - music is the language of the soul. (Rockstar Lestat wheeeeeeeen)
[Louis] "Music pierced his damned soul. And any humans who were involved with the creation of it existed on an elevated plane in his eyes. I was moved to see he too had his human attachments. And this woman sang for us, it seemed, articulating the difficult love we often had trouble expressing ourselves."
No but it's the way Louis' voice is just so full of love here, so soft and fond and reminiscing, as if he doesn't even realise how tenderly he's speaking of Lestat a century later, while 1917's Louis' face is equally as soft and fond and gazing tenderly at Lestat as Lestat's singing to himself. *scream cont'd*
Lestat reacting to the tenor's false notes: absolute ear Lestat. (tho tbh even I can hear how horrendous the tenor sounds, and I know next to nothing about music technicality - but I did went to the opera last week for the first time in several years and the tenor was fantastic)
[Louis] "The hunt was on" - yes please.
[Louis] "This poor soul was someone's son, someone's brother, and he was to be slaughtered for what? A false note?" - aw, Louis' humanity. Baby you're too good.
Hi, excuse me again, Lestat speaking Italian? Sam speaking Italian???? SO FUCKING GOOD. Petition to have Sam speak Italian again in season 3, and even more languages. Wanna hear him speak Greek and Arabic please oh my vampire gods make it happen.
[Louis] "'Why do you do this, Lestat?' [Lestat] 'Well, I like to do it. I enjoy it.' [Louis] 'Well, I don't. You don't have to humiliate him.' [Lestat] 'Well I don't say that you have to enjoy it! Kill them swiftly if you have to, but DO IT! Embrace what you are! You are a killer, Louis!'"
Was tempted to put all of Lestat's line in all caps, because man the shift from gallant speaking Lestat to losing-his-shit-ROARING Lestat was something. Oh, and here's the main current issues as of 1917 between them. And while they're having their little domestic squabble, a man's bleeding on the poor rug that didn't ask for it. The rug, that is. Not the man.
[Louis] "I was in denial. For in bringing death, Lestat was an artist. He had cut the man tenderly so that he could not call for help, but also so that his death was slow, meditative. And I felt a charge, witnessing it."
Listen, Lestat's an artist, period. A diva and a drama queen with several truckloads of issues, but a true artist. And again Louis' voice go soft, contemplative, tender, reminiscing about Lestat. Also, Louis, mate, the denial has been going on for more than a century at this point and not just about the subject of death and killing. Sorry to burst your bubble. Oh, and Daniel looking down, a bit disappointed I feel? as Louis describes Lestat killing, shows that Daniel's in on it too.
- [Louis] "I try to have a human dish once a week" - sorry, what? Big canon change, as far as I understood from the books, vampires can't eat or drink human food, their system isn't designed for it anymore.
Alright, do we think Alice is a construct of Daniel's mind through Armand's mind games, or do we think she's real? Haven't entirely followed the fandom's theories on this own. Do we think that Armand did stalk and traumatise Daniel for a decade after the botched '73 interview but didn't go full Devil's Minion? Or do we think he left him alone after the six days of torture? Guess season 3 will tell us. But the fact that this important little scene, of the dessert and the first proposal, happens in Paris, a city that's important to Armand... Sus, I say. Aw, Danny's a sad boy. Love Louis' face as Daniel finished talking, gives cred to the idea that these are fabricated memories. The face says "man, I'm reading your thoughts as you're speaking, and something here's fishy, something doesn't make sense, but you know what, right now I have enough on my plate with my own bullshit, can't deal with yours". Let's table it for now (that's my own "disregard", lmao). Should add screencaps to these reviews, the final image here, the long dinner table, the grey and brown coloring, the two men sitting on opposite side, that's right out of a painting. Someone who did Art History, analyse that final image.
Ooooh, I think next episode was one of my favorite, with Antoinette, Jonah, and almoooost Claudia.
episode 1 | part 1 | part 2 | episode 3 | episode 4 | episode 5 | episode 6 | episode 7
#aaand we're done for episode 2 pfiouuu that was a ride!! hope y'all are enjoying it i know i do#holy shit i think it took me 5 hours to do just one episode what the hell#rapha talks#rapha watches shows#interview with the vampire#iwtv#iwtv amc#amc iwtv#iwtv s1#iwtv rewatch#episode reaction#after the phantoms of your former self#lestat de lioncourt#louis de pointe du lac#daniel molloy#loustat#yeah that last part was definitely the loustat part of the episode#comments responses and criticism welcome
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please share your primary school au i am very curious, is it like what time of kids they were in the playground? i don’t know but now i cannot think of anything else <3
so it's a muggle au where they all meet in primary school instead. however also i don't know much about general primary schools so its very much based on my own experience (christian south england primary in late 2000s to mid 2010s)
most of them met in reception, with a few joining later & james&marlene already knowing each other from nursery & same wirh lily&severus. but on their first day at naptime, sirius crayons everyone's faces & james decides he's awesome & begs his parents to let sirius come round to play after school.
lily usually has her hair tied up in little plaits with colourful ribbon & james WILL pull on them. and lily will proceed to make fun of his colouring in (he finds it very hard to colour within the lines)
when it's the harvest festival, james is bringing a fucking sack filled with tins from lile m&s & waitrose. and remus has 1 lidl can on baked beans. so james proceeds to give remus like half of his tins so he's not embarrassed. (most other students also bought in like 1 lidl can of baked beans)
peter is a weaponised crier. he gets called a crybaby but its litr just fake tears when he wants to get out of doing something or to get someone else in trouble. sirius & james & remus are aware its fake & get peter to use it to try to get severus in trouble
the marauders OWN the jungle gym. during break times james is constantly showing off there & getting his friends and whomever else is around to watch him
lily is a rainbow & then a brownie & she always wears that uniform on mufti days. james wears a football shirt. sirius wears james' clothes once hes at school bcs he hates all his clothes his parents buy, peter also wears a football shirt bcs james does, remus just wears like a tshirt & jumper. severus wears the school uniform.
lily & severus bestfriends. but also they're always placed far apart in like every classrooms seating plan & severus gets stroppy & blames lily for it. but then he makes friends that don't frown and say thats mean when he makes sniding comments about other kids (mulciber, avery, wilkes) when they get a question wrong in class & so when they get the opportunity to sit where they like & lily tries to sit with sev, severus says no.
tw. sacrilegious behaviour towards christianity- james & sirius having hall duty, which was in the morning before assembly started you'd have to hand out the bibles to all the other kids & teachers & then take them back in at the end of assembly, this was usually a punishment for being naughty. but sirius & james having to do this but they make a games where they throw a bible down the empty corrider and see how far they can get it to go.
lily&james don't like each other but they constantly do swapsies with their lunches because lily loves euphemia's cooking & james loves the school lunches lily gets (only bcs all his friends get it & likes to fit in)
sirius&james constantly being in timeout & having to take break in the classroom & the class comes back after break to an absolutely wrecked room
lily & sev & remus take the sats SO seriously & litr no one else in class is. "you're more likely to get into a good secondary!" "you're going to a public school, remus, they'll you let you in if you didn't even do the sats"
#the sacrilegious behaviour was litr a game me & my friends did when we got put on the duty.. IM SORRY. IT WAS FUN#marauders era#marauders#anon ask#marauders muggle au
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Do NOT watch "How to make millions before grandma dies" if you are a big crier like me.
As someone who is VERY close to her grandma, this one was hard to end. Don't get me wrong It's beautiful and kinda funny (when you are not crying to death). It shows the dinamic in Amah's family when she's in a fase where all of her sons where distant, how she's afraid of not beeing visited even when she dies and all the plot just got me thinking about my grandmothers.
One of my grannies died of cancer when I was 13, just like the film, and the other lives in a apartament in front of me, that's why it was even harder and hit me so bad.
M started to visited Amah with the wrong intentions, just like her sons but It was incredible to watch the grandma and grandson dinamic. Seeing how our time is the best thing we can give to someone.
It took me more than 4 hours to watch, because I paused every scene that make me felt emocional or that I was about to cry, the movie ended and I kept crying for two more hours. I do think that if you didn't have contact with your grandparents you will not get it.
Lonely? I don’t know about that. but I dislike the days after chinese new year. the fridge’s full of leftovers and I have to eat them all alone.
You won't have to take care of me anymore.
I loved it and gave it 5 stars in letterboxd.
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The Words "Best Friends" Become Redefined. Part 2
Regulus Black AU
Summary: You had been Regulus’ friend since childhood and now his mistress. The war had changed many things, Regulus among them. Now its time to decide if you should put your self-worth over missing someone who was gone.
Pairings: Regulus Black x Reader
Rating: M- smut
Song in Chapter: King of Wishful Thinking by Go West
Link to Part 1
______
I'll get over you, I know I will. I'll pretend my ship's not sinking and I'll tell myself I'm over you. 'Cause I'm the king of wishful thinking.
Your eyes snapped open as the song on the radio began to register in your sleep-deprived mind. Groaning, you sat up and threw a shoe at the radio knocking it off of your chest of drawers. Anything about being “the queen of wishful thinking” made you want to barf.
It had been several weeks since the night at the pub and you were no closer to getting over Regulus than you were on day one. Every day seemed to be the same, emotionally. You would wake up, cry a little, get mad at yourself for being sad (because you were right and he was wrong), then get up and force yourself to put on a happy face.
Regulus wasn’t helping any matters by sending you letters every single day. He had sent you the emerald bracelet that you returned several times before you finally gave up and just kept it. When it came to the letters, you just gave them to Sirius to do whatever he wanted with them.
Sirius
You were more thankful than ever for your friendship with the elder Black brother. He was always a willing ear when you needed to rant. Sirius also took extra care to not tell Remus anything about the true nature of your relationship with Regulus. For all that Remus knew, in your mind, was your friendship with Regulus had ended and you were being a royal grouch about it.
Sighing, your mind went to the previous night when you were once again raging about Regulus to Sirius.
“I’m a real idiot, Sirius. I go around throwing away perfectly good boyfriends. Well, I don’t know if he considered himself my boyfriend but god damn it…Regulus is such a freaking jerk!”
Sirius sat on the couch watching.
“You’re still wearing his ring.”
You looked down at your hand. The ring that Regulus had given you years ago was still sitting proudly on your finger.
“I know that I am! I am a mess, Sirius. I can’t eat. I can’t sleep. All I want to do is cry. You know me, I’m not a crier! I can handle a crisis!”
Sirius smirked.
“A trait that you share with your brother so well…look, love, just because you love him doesn’t mean he’s good for you…hey look at me being the responsible one. Normally that’s your brother's job”
You groaned dramatically before sitting down.
“I know you are right but I don’t want to accept it. I am having a shit time at just throwing away a ten-year friendship and slight love affair. Why wasn’t I good enough for Regulus to fight for? Why couldn’t he say no to your family’s psycho ways and fight for me? Am I not…”
Sirius held a hand up.
“I’m just going to stop you right there, Y/n. You are more than good enough! You have always been good enough! Personally, I think that you are too good for the bum. Now come with me, we are going to do something. I want no complaining.”
You reluctantly followed Sirius into your bedroom. He led you to your full-sized mirror and put you in front of it.
“Now I want you to stand here, look at yourself, and tell me some of your best qualities.”
You gave your friend a frown only to earn a slap to the behind.
“I’m your best friend. I can do that…now get going, sugar bean.”
You sighed and looked at your reflection for a moment before meeting Sirius’ waiting eyes.
“I’m smart. I’m a good friend. I’ll fight for those I care about no matter the cost. I have a giving heart…I may be a sass queen…”
Sirius snorted.
“May be?”
You chuckled before turning around and hugging Sirius.
‘“Thank you, Sirius.”
Getting out of bed, you felt somewhat better. While Sirius could drive you crazy, he also knew how to make you feel a lot better.
He really does remind me of Regulus.
A truer thought couldn’t have been said about that one. Whether they argued and swore that they were totally different. Regulus and Sirius’ friendship styles were extremely similar. Standing in you in front of the mirror and making you list off good qualities about yourself was definitely something that Regulus would have done.
Stepping into the shower, you sighed in relief as the hot water washed over your aching muscles. In addition to your poor state of mental health, you had been pulling extra duties for The Order. This meant nightly patrols, tons of research, and spying on unsuspecting death eaters with Sirius and Remus.
“Hi sugar, I know that you miss me.”
You froze. This had been the first time that you had heard Regulus’ voice in your mind. Legilimency. Of course, Regulus could do this. You internally smacked yourself in the head as you “chose” to ignore him.
“Oh, you’re still not talking to me, huh? That’s too bad. I miss you, princess. Do you really expect me to go from spending every day with you for ten years to nothing so easily? I miss everything about you.”
You closed your eyes. Even though you were quite good at Occlumency, you made no move to push Regulus from your mind. Maybe you were asking for what you were getting. Maybe you were being weak…but damn it was wonderful to hear Regulus’ voice in your mind.
“Still nothing? Y/n, you really are being so stubborn. Maybe you should know what I miss. I miss seeing your beautiful face underneath me. How beautiful you look after I kiss your lips until they’re swollen and your cheeks are flushed bright pink. I miss how desperate you get when I suck on those dusty nipples. I miss how you move under me. You can’t tell me, love, that you don’t miss how your pussy trembles when I’m pushing in. Don’t forget, sweetheart, that it was I that showed you how to please a man. Now, that I know you are wet, how about a word? Anything…tell me where you are and I’ll come to you. We can fix all of these nasty little issues that we are having and get back to us…the real us.”
You bit your lip at “the real us.” Regulus didn’t remember what the real “Regulus and Y/n” was. He forgot what your friendship meant. He forgot what actual love was…
Forcing Regulus’ voice from your mind, you quickly turned off the shower.
“I have got to keep him out of my mind.”
You spent the majority of the day trying your best to avoid having your mind fall back to Regulus. Thankfully, there was enough crazy going on at the ministry to keep you busy for hours. The less that Regulus graced your mind the better. You weren’t able to sit around and think about his cocky voice in your head that morning…and how deliciously deep his voice sounded.
Merlin, I am really fucked.
You thought before putting your head down on your desk. Maybe you were more screwed than your realized?
Later that day you were more than happy to meet Remus and Sirius for dinner at a bar. Seeing your friends was just what you needed to “get out of your head.” The moment that you walked into the bar, Sirius motioned you over to the table.
Taking off your jacket, you nearly collapsed at the table. Normally, you would have kissed Remus and Sirius both on the top of their heads. Today, that wasn’t happening. Both men looked slightly offended as you held your hand up.
“Rain check. What a day! I am beat!”
You commented as Remus slid you a glass of fire whiskey. He gave you a small smile. Remus wasn’t a fool. He knew that there was more to your friendship with Regulus ending than what he was being told. Remus wanted nothing more than to question you and then go kill Regulus…but that would get him nowhere. You were depressed enough as it was. If he “offed” Regulus, you would be inconsolable. If Remus was to do anything, it would be to let you tell him in your own time.
What is it with Lupins finding the Blacks so damn interesting?
Remus looked across the table at Sirius who gave him a small smile.
Oh, that…that right there.
Remus added to his thoughts before turning to you.
“Long day?
You nodded.
“We don’t have many short ones any longer. I swear, this war needs to hurry the hell up. I don’t think that I was meant for this being careful thing. I ran into Augustus Rockwood today and had to stop myself from saying you’re next mother fucker.”
Sirius giggled.
“I’m surprised that you didn’t. Y/n, I have to say that Remus and yourself are the sassiest people that I know.”
“Does that assessment include yourself?”
Remus asked, cheekily. Sirius rolled his eyes.
“See what I mean? Sass!”
You leaned back in your chair and took a sip of your whiskey as the lights in the bar went out. Immediately, you reached for your wand as some death eaters walked into the bar.
“Boy, they sure like to make a big entrance.”
You murmured as Remus, Sirius, and yourself dropped to the floor. Remus’ eyes were wide as he turned to you.
“Get out. There is an exit in the back. Sirius and I will take the exit over there. If we all go together it will draw too much attention. If you want to go with Sirius, I’ll go the back way.”
You shook your head. The last thing that you were about to do was let them be separated. Besides, you could handle getting out on your own.
“No, just go. I’ll meet you lot back home.”
You whispered before crawling off toward the back of the pub as people in the bar started screaming. As much as you wanted to go back and fight, you knew it would be stupid. The three of you were outnumbered.
Once in the other room, you moved to stand up but someone grabbed you from behind. You quickly threw your elbow back hitting whoever it was in the ribs. When they made a painful moan, you pulled away enough to get a good look at who it was.
“Going somewhere, sugar?
You froze as Regulus took off his mask. As much as you wanted to stand and stare at him, you couldn’t. Taking out your wand you launched hex after hex at Regulus only for him to repel them away. You wanted him to hurt as much as you were hurting!
“Come on sugar is that the best you’ve got?”
Regulus said, sounding bored. You stopped and glared at him. You wanted Regulus to feel your misery. If there was anything of the man that you cared about in there…you wanted him to see your side.
“I don’t kill things. Unlike you, I don’t hurt people that I care about.”
Regulus chuckled.
“Oh, sugar. You really are mad.”
You picked up an empty bottle and threw it at Regulus. He sighed as it only hit him in the chest.
“Go away, Regulus. If you’re going to kill me then just be a man and do it.”
You snapped. Regulus was about to reply but stopped the moment that he heard Lucius Malfoy’s voice. He stood motionless for a moment before rushing forward and wrapping his arms around you.
“Don’t scream. Be silent.”
He hissed before standing his body upright. The last thing that Regulus wanted was for Malfoy to have any idea that he had “company.”
“Black, we need to go. Nothing that we came for is here. It was another piece of bloody useless information.”
You stood wrapped in Regulus’ arms clutching tightly to his death-eater robes as he gently rubbed soothing circles on your back.
Soothing…what is happening here?
You thought before taking a moment and breathing him in. Never in a million years did you think that you would ever be in Regulus’ arms like this again…yet here you were. There you were and he was holding you just as he did before turning away from you.
“I knew it was a waste of time. Go ahead, I’ll be along shortly. There is something else that I need to take care of.”
Regulus replied. He waited until he was positive that Malfoy was gone before letting go of you. When you looked back at your love’s face, he looked ready to panic. His cool calm composure was gone.
“Take the second door and get out of here. Turn into your animagus form the instant you are outside and don’t turn back into a human until you are home. Run and don’t look back…just run.”
“Reg..I…”
He shook his head before pulling you into a kiss. Neither of you moved away from the other for a moment. It was savoring the moment… enjoying the closeness that both of you missed. You sighed as Regulus’ tongue caressed yours. This was the kiss that you missed…the kiss that you longed for in your dreams…
Regulus was the first to pull away.
“Go! Stop wasting time…just please…go.”
You gave him one final look before morphing into your cat animagus form and rushing out the door into the dark silence of the ally way…
______ @amelie-black @jessyballet @knreidy1 @georgeweasleydumbhoe @justfinishthis @acciosiriusblack @siriuslyceleste @mimisparkle12 @teletubiswszpilkach @ell0ra-br3kk3r @darkenwolfie @livshifts @stelleduarte @starsval @millies0bsimp @coffeeaddictednymph @readtomeregulus @daddyslittlevillain @rogue-nyx88 @panpride @saramaple @missgorldafirst @s-we-e-t-t-ea @taylor-will-be-the-death-of-me @f4iryluvy @buttercup-beeee @i-love-scott-mccall @gugggu6gvai @jag9000 @quinis @yousmellllikecaca @mentally-unstable-hoe @haroldpotterson @padf00ts-l0ver @goldensunshineshit @aurorasnape12 @ad-astra-again @rubyroscoe1 @dumybitch @spideyxalmighty @lucasfilms77 @lostarc24 @marichromatic @play-morezeppelin @ravenhood2792 @un-lovesherself @melaninnbarbie @criminalyetminimal @brokencasbutt67-writer @authoressskr @moldy-old-boot @hankypranky @summer-novak @emiwrites3reads @shaylybaby2032 @knight-of-gleefulness @deanwherescas @sprnaturallover @wontlookaway @shitfaceddaniel-blog @untoldshortsofthefandoms @li0nh34rt @tas898 @mycuddlycorner
#Regulus Black#Regulus Black x Reader#Reader x Regulus Black#Sirius Black#Remus Lupin#Timothee Chalamet as Regulus Black#Ben Barnes as Sirius Black#Andrew Garfield as Remus Lupin#Aaron Taylor Johnson as James Potter#Regulus x Reader#Reader x Regulus#Regulus Black x Reader smut#hp#hp marauders#Marauders#harry potter marauders#young marauders#marauders era fic#the ancient and noble house of black#Regulus Arcturus Black#Sirius Orion Black#regulus black fics#regulus black au#regulus black smut#The Words Best Friends Become Redefined#The Words Best Friends Become Redefined Part 2#pm update#update
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calling Edward cute names like bunny/kitty/puppy and he's a little embarassed but he just melts!! And calling him that while you fuck him softly!!
Sweet Little Bunny - Edward Nashton x GN!Reader Headcannons (NSFW)
Contains: usage of literal pet names, praise, cumming inside, fluffy smut.
Note: one of my favorite requests in awhile. Thanks, sweetie. 🥰

♡ "Oh, bunny, does it feel good?"
♡ Edward grips your hips to force you to stop bouncing. His blood runs paper thin and frosty cold. "W-what did you call me?"
♡ Your cheeks flush a brutal burgundy. "Bunny," you mumble. "I'm sorry, was that weird?" You gasp and spasm around him as he suddenly begins to rock up into you again. "No, no," he chokes out desperately. "I liked it."
♡ "Oh, good. That's good," you pant. "Because you really are such a good bunny." Edward grins, slick drool trailing from the side of his mouth. "M-my sweet little puppy."
♡ His mossy green eyes are rolling back into his head as his fingers grip tighter into dip of your hipbones. Oh, how cute...this is really exciting him. You wonder what's past his cherubic pink cheeks and glossy eyes. How beautifully his mind must be short-circuiting right now...how gorgeously the sparks must be flying, how entrancing the smoking wires must smell.
♡ Your fingernails dig into the flesh of his shoulders as you ride him harder. "You like being my sweet little kitty, don't you? You love being my beautiful bunny, huh?"
♡ His mewls are thick and sticky like honey. The sound of your wet skin slapping together is sweet and juicy like fresh fruit at a summer stand. How you wish to sink your glinting teeth into his ripe shoulder blade. How lovely he would look, splattered with lemon-lavender bruises. All marked up...your little bunny. <3
♡ "Be good for me, kitty. Come on and cum for me, puppy. I want you to."
♡ Your silky smooth words have him bucking his quivering hips up and spilling inside of you in an instant. And don't @ me on this one, but I headcannon Eddie to be a bit of a crier after sex. You've got to hold him close in your warm aura. Reassure him: he is good, he is beautiful, he is loved. Above all else, he's yours...you'd fight off whatever was pouring doubt into his bloodstream.
♡ Trying new things can freak Eddie out a bit. But these candy-sweet nicknames you've inscribed into the wrinkles of his brain...yeah, he can manage them.
#Eli’s writing#Danonation#Paul Dano#Edward Nashton#The Riddler#The Batman#Edward Nashton x reader#The Riddler x reader#Edward Nashton x you#The Riddler x you#Edward Nashton x Y/N#The Riddler x Y/N
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Midyear Book Freakout Tag 2024
Haven't done this in a few years and no one asked for it but here we go
1) Best book:
Lots of contenders for this, but I think it has to be A Room of One's Own by Virginia Woolf. Fantastic writing on a great subject
2) Best sequel:
I haven't really read any traditional sequels where a story continues on from another, but any of the Sherlock Holmes books/short story collections works for this. Maybe The Memoirs of Sherlock Holmes or The Hound of the Baskvilles as favorites? Idk
3) New releases you want to read
Henry Henry by Allen Bratton, but idk when I'll get to it because I'd need to get an interlibrary loan
4) Most anticipated release
I'm lowkey bad at keeping up with whats coming out BUT I am excited to read Failure to Comply by @librarycards
5) Biggest Disappointment
Probably Disability Visibility edited by Alice Wong because I had heard it was great and a good introduction to writings on disability, but ended up being a very mixed collection of writings and a lot of it just felt meh
6) Biggest Surprise
Perhaps Zong! by M. NourbeSe Philip? Not surprise in the sense that once I knew what it was I thought I wouldn't like it, but surprise in the sense I had never heard of it until I was assigned to read it in a class about literature of the Middle Passage
7) Favorite new author
Virginia Woolf. I've read Orlando before but I don't really remember it; reading A Room of One's Own made me realize I love her writing style
8) Newest fictional crush
Closest answer I can give to this is Sherlock Holmes because I do love that bitch but idk if "crush" is the right word for it or if he counts as new if I was familiar with his character from the Granada tv series
9) Newest favorite character
To not repeat saying Sherlock Holmes, I'm going to say Merricat Blackwood from We Have Always Lived in the Castle even though I've read that before, so again, it doesn't really count as new
10) A book that made you cry
None despite historically being a known crier
11) A book that made you happy
Uhhhhh I guess one of the Sherlock Holmes ones? I tend to read sad shit and reviewing what I've read so far this year there isn't really "happy" material besides that
12) Most beautiful book you've bought or received
Big fan of these two

13) What books do you need to read by the end of the year?
Well. Finish what I'm currently reading (Slouching Towards Bethlehem by Joan Didion, Noor by Nnedi Okorafor, Moby Dick by Herman Melville, The Return of Sherlock Holmes by Arthur Conan Doyle), also read Before We Were Trans by Kit Heyam because I have it out from the library, same with The White Album by Joan Didion because it is also in the massive book of nonfiction work from Didion I have out from the library, and I think Sara @colors-changing-hue & I are going to attempt to finish all of the Sherlock Holmes books by the end of the year but we've been slow on that recently so we'll see if that happens (to complete the series we'd nees to finish The Return of Sherlock Holmes and then read The Valley of Fear, His Last Bow, and The Case-Book of Sherlock Holmes). Besides all of that for fun, once classes start back up I will be reading a lot of Shakespeare for my class on his early plays, some medieval romances for a class on that genre, and probably some books about Hitchcock because I'm taking a class on his films and the professor teaching it usually assigns a few whole books to read besides articles & stuff
#aj reads#answered all of these instead of actually reading 😭#have got to make a reading routine or something because since my summer camp job started i've been having a hard time getting around to it
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