#because I was ‘crazy’. that same day I left my house and headed straight for our overpass because I couldn’t handle the guilt

[leannswritings]

Our Designer - part 2

Syn : after that crazy dream you had of Viktor, you end up talking to friends about it. Now do you confess or let it go.

Warnings ! - Smut, slight slapping, choking, and whatever else I wrote that I can't remember...

Word count - 2.5k

A/N : Ngl i find Viktor so relatable as someone that has health problems..lwk understand why he almost took over the world. Anyways sorry if there's any misspelling + if the smut/confession isn't good it's been a while since i wrote so let me know what yall think I could change in the future, enjoy ♡ p.s should I make another part that's just fluff orrr...

A couple of days after the dream, you decided to talk about it with your closest friend, Caitlyn. You both had finally had an off day together, so you decided to head over to her house to hang out and catch her up on everything.

"SO let me get this straight..you had a dream, and not just a dream, but a wet dream about him? BUT you can't even ask him to go out with you."

Cait said as she walked back and forth in front of the bed you were sitting on. You nodded as you picked up a piece of fruit.

"Why don't you just ask him out...or sleep with him..."

She slightly whispered the last part. You immediately dropped the fruit in your hand to reply.

"Cait. I'm not gonna ask him to randomly sleep with me...are you okay? Are you feeling all right? Because you don't seem to be thinking clearly."

"I don't see the problem; maybe he wants it too; ever think about that."

She said with a shrug as if she knew something, you on the other hand, were in every way trying to convince her not to say such "nonsense"

"Cait..Caitlyn I'm not going to randomly ask Viktor to fuc—"

"Am I interrupting..?"

Jayce walks into the room with a smile on his face; at this point, you could've guessed he heard the conversation and was just creepily waiting behind the door. He quickly came and sat on the bed beside you, before reaching over you and grabbing fruit.

"I think you should. There's plenty of possibilities of what could happen if you confess, plus the worst he could say is no...as if that would happen "

Realizing he just said the last part out loud, he shoved the fruit in his mouth and turned away from you just for you to pull his face back towards you and hit him in the throat, forcing the fruit to come out his mouth. He choked a little before looking at you with those same puppy eyes he always does when he does something wrong.

"What did he say to you? What do you mean, wait? Wait, just tell me what he thinks about me; you already told me a little, so just tell me."

Curiosity and Joy were overflowing within you, and everyone could tell that you were starting to freak out. Jayce quickly ate some fruit and swallowed before getting up and backing up from you, before refusing to tell you anymore because he realized saying that little bit was enough. You chased him around the room, trying to get more information out of him, which failed even after you pinned him down.

"What if I said I told him to stop by your place tonight...I got tired of both of you."

"What. You asked him to come over to MY place, even though your apartment is RIGHT next door.?"

You quickly let go of Jayce, and started slightly freaking out before he explained that he convinced Viktor to go to your place for "research purposes" and by saying everyone would be there. Of course you didn't even know if he was even telling the truth by saying that, but either way it slightly freaked you out because you realized that your room was covered in papers of design and other future ideas for hextech, leaving a horrible mess. You quickly ate some fruit, hugged your friends, and left, realizing you had plenty of work to do at home.

————

You finally finished cleaning up what you thought made you seem messy, rearranging other things that might be slightly off-putting. You looked around worrying about what else you could change around as if he hadn't been over to your place before, including when the floors were covered in paper (which is now in a messy stack on the table since it's the topic of the meaning anyways), as soon as you tried to find something else to move you heard a knock at your door.

You quickly ran over to the door, looked around to make sure everything was in place, patted your chest to calm down, and opened the door. Your eyes met with his amber eyes, his eyes always looked as if they had glowed no matter the time of the day.

"Is Jayce here yet?"

He said as he walked in, looking around to see if Jayce would appear out of the blue. You shook your head, and then both headed to your room. In your room there's a floor table in the center that has all of the paper stacked on it, you moved some of the papers slightly to the side so Viktor had somewhere to write. You reached into your closet and got some pillows to sit on. Viktor just stood there and stared as you walked around the room getting things, saying nothing the whole time.

An hour had passed that you guys were studying and going over hextech and the future of the hex. It was really hard to focus on the papers and conversations that were held, Viktor had to snap at you multiple times to catch your attention. It seemed that Viktor was slightly getting annoyed at the fact you kept getting distracted by the littlest thing; if the temperature changed by 1 degree, it was like you could tell and immediately start moving around or talking about it.

"Do you have something to say?"

Viktor caught you staring at him once again; this time, you absolutely couldn't help it; you really liked the face he made when he got frustrated. You moved closer to him, leaning into his bubble until it popped, now inches away from his face.

"Yeah."

That was the only word you could sigh out before leaning into a kiss; you leaned back after realizing what you did. The feeling of regret rained down on you as you saw Viktor touch his lips in shock before he made eye contact with you. You immediately stood and tried to confess, yet out of fear, you apologized.

"I'm so sorry; I didn't mean to. Viktor I reall—"

At that moment, got silent as Viktor pulled you by your arm, forcing you back down and into his lap. The silence was so loud, you were sure at this point he could hear your heartbeat, and feel the other one. Viktor gave you this look that you couldn't even explain before leaning into another kiss. This kiss felt so different from others in the past, the way his hands traced your face, how sweet the kiss felt, and the fact you could feel him under you. You fixed your position and threw your legs on both sides of him,centering yourself, your hands holding his face. His hands traveled down your body, tracing your outlines before stopping at your waist. You broke away from the Makeout to catch your breath, the fact that this was happening was pretty overwhelming. Viktor moved down your neck leaving kisses in every spot that he could, your body reacting to his every move, as your hips started to rock. There's been plenty of times you've stared at your ceiling but this time...you have never been so glad to be looking at the same o,ld ceiling.

"Vik-viktor hold on.."

You pushed yourself off of him and stood up, you helped him up and sat him on your bed. It'll be much more comfortable and more spacious than being on the floor, but you didn't have any time to say anything as you immediately went back to the sweetness of his lips that you liked so much. He pushed you onto your back and continued going down your neck, unbuttoning your shirt as he laid kisses down onto your skin, finally reaching the top of your pants, unbuckling your belting, and pulling your pants off. He looked up at you, his fingers traced around your hips and thighs holding off on actually touching you where you wanted. He really liked to see that pathetic look on your face when you couldn't get your way, he smiled before he slid his fingers in you, his thumb fooling around with your clit. He went back up, laid on his side, and continued playing with your lips as his fingers played inside of you. You moaned against his lips as you pushed your legs together trapping his hand there. Maybe being a workaholic and toying with things all day was worth it in the long run because now his fingers that usually fondle with metals,pens, and paper are now fondling with you. It didn't take long for you to have an orgasm; you've never had one that fast; maybe it was due to the built-up feelings and lust, or maybe it was just his touch. Your legs finally opened up, letting him remove his hand.

"Already..? That's disappointing.."

Viktor had this smug look on his face; if he could say more, he would, but he seemed to be holding back for now. You pushed him to lie on his back, taking a stressor off his leg. You both reached for his pants at the same time, rushing to take them off. Viktor was a very introverted person, not one to boast about what he achieved or has, but man this was something you think was reasonable to boast about. You sat on top of him; his tip, which was slightly sticking out of his underwear, was already starting to leak pre-cum. Your hand rubbed his face; your thumb found its way into his mouth; Viktor's tongue and your thumb had a short battle as he suddenly bit down on your thumb. You had a sudden and quick reaction, you withdrew your thumb and slapped him. The expected reaction was disgust or him being upset, but instead, you got a smile, and his face fell back into your hand. Viktor looked up at you that with those gorgeous amber eyes; it seemed that at, the moment, he viewed you as other-worldly.

"Shit..Viktor you're disgusting.."

You gave a soft laugh in response. "so he's one of those," was your thought process at the time; the thought of being roug,h with each other was such a turn-on; now the real question was, is he going to be rough with you? Your body continued to rub against his due to the thoughts running through your mind. Viktor laid kisses against your hands and wrist, his gaze was intense. His eyelids were low giving him this desperate look, his hands moved from yours to your hips. His grip on your hips was so tight, you were sure it would leave marks, he had pure control of how your body moved at this point. His hands made you grind against him at a slower pace than before, this annoyed you, you were already close to asking for him to fuck you point blank. Of course he did this on purpose, how else would he have fun if he couldn't see you annoyed or desperate for a feeling.

"You seem..ann-annoyed"

Viktor stuttered, it seems that his accent gets thicker in situations like this.

"I don't have time to play with you viktor.."

"Really? I have plenty."

A smart-ass just like his friend. This wasn't a joking matter for you, the hunger and need was hard to ignore or just toy with at this point. You needed Viktor bad, you needed the pleasure. You couldn't help that a few tears fell from your eyes from how annoyed you were.

"You really are that..desperate.."

Viktor seem to give in after seeing a few tears, he loosen his grip on your hips, giving you time to take his out his dick and line it up with your entrance. You were planning to go slow, but at that moment, he grabbed your hips and forced you down, and let out a loud moan. You immediately covered your mouth to try and suppress your voice, though you didn't do a very good job as your whimpers could be heard echoing off the walls. At this moment you could only hope Jayce and your other neighbors weren't home. The sounds of skin touching skin and voices harmonizing covered the room. You continued the bounce on him, hoping the roughness wouldn't leave him with any pain. He fit perfectly inside of you, as if he was made for you, rubbing against your insides. You could only hope this would go on forever as he continued hitting your G-spot. One of his hands left your hip and went to one of your hands that was on his shoulders, Picking it up and leading it to his neck, letting you know what to do.

"Vik- you're si-sick"

Even though that stumbled out of your mouth you didn't refuse. You wrapped both your hands around his neck as you continued to ride him. His reaction made you realize something about yourself you didn't think you wanted to know, adding the cherry on top of the knot in your stomach. Viktor eyes went from staring at you with such love and lust to starting to roll to the ball of his head; he seemed to be getting close,the pressure from your hands adding to the pleasure he felt from your warmth. Without any warning, you felt him coat your insides, and as a reaction, you let go of his neck. Soon after you hit your climax, it seemed like heaven on earth, the pleasure was something you've yet to experience before. The room was greeted by heavy breathing and other soft sounds. One more round wouldn't hurt..or a couple.

———

The sun shined through your bedroom window, both of you were supposed to be in the lab hours ago but decided to stay lying together. The sun shined just enough for Viktor's eyes to glow from the light, his lashes draped over his eyes in such a beautiful way. You moved your head from his arm to his chest so you didn't have to look him in the face, even though you've already seen more of each other than the average person it was still hard for you to explain what you wanted to truly tell him last night.

"V—"

"Y—"

You both called out at the same time; despite you telling him to go first afterward, he still waited for you to speak.

"Viktor, what I wanted to say last night is, I really like you and working by your side. I can't and don't want to see myself in any other place other than by your side. Cheesy I know but I seriously mean it."

Silence. Silence was who greeted you, you would've felt embarrassed if you were laying on his chest. His heart told on himself, it getting louder by the second, it was beating so fast you wouldn't be shocked if it exploded at that very moment.

"I- me too"

A few Czech words slipped out in the beginning but he just kept his answer simple, you guess his brain just went back to his native because of the situation. It was cute seeing him all nervous, something you've yet to see before. Something about the tenderness and comfort you got from each other was different from before, you never would've guessed such a quiet nerdy dude would be so...comforting and awkward.

[moonlit-imagines]

Told You So

Lip Gallagher x reader

warnings: abuse ment

a/n:

prompt: anonymous: “Lip and reader are close friends who grew to have feelings for each other, but reader is in a toxic relationship (doesn’t have to be physically abusive you can write what you’re comfortable with, I don’t mind either way) . The Gallaghers already know because they’ve had to help them out a few times. Readers partner doesn’t like Lip/The Gallaghers so reader isn’t really aloud to be at the house. One day reader is having a shitty day and decides to go see Lip anyway. Maybe reader’s partner finds out or sees them together and tries to drag reader away but Lip isn’t having it. Maybe they (Lip and R’s partner) fight, ofc Lip win, and it ends in reader patching him up and they maybe they kiss🤭”

“Fuckin’ ay…” Lip mutters loud enough for you to hear as you both sit at a standstill on the swings at a nearby park. His curse interrupts your conversation, one that was already stressing him out enough since it seemed to be the same one you always had.

“Speak of the devil, I guess…” You noticed what—or rather, who he was talking about when your boyfriend could be seen across the street, headed straight towards the two of you. “You can go, Lip. I don’t want you to have to deal with any of this.” Lip sat motionless on the swing, eyes dead locked on your boyfriend. “Lip, you hearing me? I said get out of here. He’s gonna flip.” You waved your hand in front of his face and before you knew it your boyfriend stood in front of him.

“Hey, big guy!” Lip got up, wielding a wide smile that left your boyfriend unsettled. “It’s so great to see you here, I was starting to worry that maybe that bruise on your eye was gonna prevent you from being able to, what do you always say? ‘Look after y/n.’” You and your boyfriend looked at each other in confusion and back to Lip, then your boyfriend took a step forward to intimidate. Too bad for him, Lip wasn’t one to back down.

“The hell you say to me?” Said your boyfriend, towering over Lip and ready to fight since the last time he told him to stay the hell away from you. Lip always made him feel insecure it seemed.

“Oh, I guess that bruise isn’t quite there yet.” Lip sarcastically poked the side of his face with a smirk. “You’re gonna want to ice it, though.” Suddenly, a punch was thrown by your friend and you gasped as your boyfriend nearly fell back.

“Lip, stop!” You shouted and jumped off the swings to distance yourself from their fight. Your boyfriend was quick to fight back and there were fists and blood flying practically everywhere. Lip made sure to get a few good licks to the eye like he promised, getting on top and landing punch after punch after punch until your boyfriend threw him off and gave up.

“Man, I don’t give a shit anymore. Have y/n, they’re not worth all this.” Your boyfriend spat blood onto the dirt and left, leaving Lip laying in the dirt and laughing dryly at the pale grey sky.

“What the hell is wrong with you?” You asked him as he continued his laughter. “Lip, you shouldn’t have done that. He’s leaving, I have to go after him!” You began to panic and as you walked by him, Lip grabbed your ankle.

“Dude, you’re crazy. Just let him leave.” Lip calmly said through light panting. “He doesn’t give a shit about you. I do.” Lip let you go and to his surprise, you actually stayed. You stared down at him and just watched him watching you. You saw all this dirt and mud and muck and blood all over his face and clothes. “Let’s just go back to my house, forget all this shit happened.”

“Yeah…you look like hell.” You replied jokingly. Well, it was true, but you said it jokingly. “But I want to fix it.”

“Don’t.” He replied bluntly. “But maybe you could fix me? I might need some stitches, that son of a bitch has some dumbass rings.”

“Oh, I can see the skull indent on your forehead.” You crouched down to look at him closer.

“Can you?” He asked, rubbing the area you were staring at.

“No.” You chuckled. “Get up. Let’s go.” You held out your hand and helped him to his feet, noticing he was a little dizzy. “Will you ever give my boyfriends a chance or will it always be like this?” You asked him, walking down the middle of the empty street.

“Will you ever give me a chance?” He replied, looking straight ahead as not to fill his head with any hope or embarrassment by your first reaction. You didn’t say anything. “I don’t just hate your boyfriend’s for no reason. And I don’t hate them out of jealousy either.”

“Then why do you hate them?” You asked him, trying to hear it in his own words.

“Why the hell do you think, y/n?” Lip’s voice raised a bit and he scoffed. You stuffed your hands in your coat pockets and continued on in silence, feeling a little hurt that he wasn’t more gentle with you. “Y/N, you know. I know you know. Everyone knows. You date these shitty guys then run to me when there’s a problem with your shitty guy and every time I sit there and I tell you he’s a shitty guy and he shows you just how shitty he is and we do it all over again. I’m a shitty guy, too, but I’m never gonna treat you like that.”

“You’re not a shitty guy.” You said quietly.

“No, I am. But I wouldn’t be to you.” Lip kicked a rock across the street and moved along, still unwilling to look at you. “You should just give me a chance. I’m tired to beating your boyfriends up when I can just be your boyfriend.”

“I’ll think about it.”

taglist: @ravenmoore14 // @multifandomfix // @augustvandyne // @summersimmerus // @beth-gallagher22 // @xoxobabydolls // @evilcr0ne // @stitched-mouth // @thedarkqueenofavalon // @elenavampire21 //

[foreverisntenough]

‘Movie Night’

Summary: If only life was like the movies. For years, you’d flirted with the idea of something more with Trent, your brother’s best friend.  You'd always danced around the edges of something more with him, sharing flirty moments that felt like scenes straight from the cinema. You had been silently desperate for the main character of your life’s film to finally get the boy but you knew moments like that were saved for Hollywood. The lines were clear; you were always going to be his mate’s little sister. So what happens when you go off script? In a whirlwind of passion, secrets, and stolen moments, you're left wondering: will you and your brother's best friend get the happy ending you've been waiting for, or was it never meant to be more than a fantasy? 

Index:

Warnings: This series is 18+ MDNI [ smut, slight mention of dv, loss of a parent, drinking - not sure what else really… if i miss anything please lmk!

Note: Thank you for reading! Please be sure to like, comment, or message me what you think of the series!

Disclaimer: No one is crazy about him atm, me included, so this is strictly for my readers and my readers only. I don’t condone his behavior at all -Just let me finish out this fic please. Don’t come for me. I’m only a girl with a google doc whose spent hours upon hours and days on end on this fic

Chapter 11 - 'She's Something' | ‘Movie Night'

word count - 11.3k

The early morning light filtered through the blinds in soft streaks, casting a warm glow over the room. The house was silent, the kind of stillness that only exists just before the world begins to wake. You stirred awake, blinking against the gentle light, and for a moment, you simply watched Trent sleep. His features were relaxed, his breathing steady, his arm lazily draped across the bed where you had been moments before. The sight made your chest ache, but in the sweetest way. He was perfect. Slipping out of bed as quietly as you could, you padded to the kitchen, the cool tiles beneath your feet making you shiver slightly. The space was dimly lit, the morning sun not quite reaching it yet. You moved with purpose but also with care, opening drawers and cabinets softly, grabbing what you needed to make breakfast. The sound of eggs cracking broke the silence, followed by the gentle hiss of butter melting in the pan. You whisked the eggs, your movements rhythmic and calming, the act of cooking grounding you in the moment. The scent of fresh coffee brewing mingled with the faint, lingering traces of Trent’s cologne still on your skin, making you smile. You set the table quietly, plates arranged just so, and folded a napkin absentmindedly. As you reached for the coffee pot, pouring it into two mugs, you felt a presence behind you. Before you could turn, warm arms wrapped around your waist, pulling you back against a solid chest.

“Wow,” Trent murmured, his voice deep and gravelly from sleep. “I thought I’d get a cuddle this morning, but this…” He rested his chin lightly on your shoulder. “This might be better.” You tilted your head back to look at him, his eyes still half-lidded but shining with warmth. 

“I was hungry,” you teased, laughing softly as his hands tightened slightly around your waist. “Last night was genuinely a work out.” You giggled. 

“Yeah?” he said, his voice soft but laced with amusement. He leaned in, pressing his lips lightly to your temple, his warmth chasing away the slight chill from the morning air. “You look so good in the morning, you know that?”

“I look the same,” you replied, a small laugh escaping as you turned back to the pan, flipping the eggs.

“Nah,” he countered, his voice dropping lower as his fingers brushed lightly against the curve of your hip. “You don’t. You’re just… soft. Sexy but softer,” he added, his tone earnest and just a little teasing. You rolled your eyes, unable to stop the smile spreading across your face. 

“You’re just saying that because I made breakfast and you’re  trying to make sure some’s for you,” you said, though your voice lacked any real conviction. He hummed in response, his lips brushing against the nape of your neck. 

“No,” he whispered, his breath sending a shiver down your spine. “I mean it.” For a moment, you just stood there, wrapped in his arms, the warmth of the stove in front of you blending with the heat radiating from him. “But some is for me though, right?” He asked cheekily and you hummed in response just the same as he did before you both fell into a comfortable silence. The quiet intimacy of the moment felt like a gift, something that needed no words or grand gestures to make it feel special. As you moved to plate the eggs, Trent turned you gently, guiding you to face him. 

“Leave it,” he said softly, taking the spatula from your hand and placing it on the counter. “Breakfast can wait a minute. C’mere, baby.” He leaned down, brushing his lips against yours in a slow, deliberate kiss that made the room seem even quieter, the world beyond it fading entirely. When he pulled back, his thumb brushed lightly over your cheek as if he couldn’t help but touch you.

“You really think I look good in the morning?” you asked shyly, your voice barely above a whisper. He smiled, his gaze locked on yours, full of something deeper than just affection. 

“I think you look perfect,” he said simply, his sincerity wrapping around you like a second set of arms. And as the morning light poured in, soft and golden, you couldn’t help but feel that maybe, just maybe, this was what happiness felt like—quiet, warm, and impossibly sweet. 

The morning sunlight continued to spill softly through the windows as Trent sat at the kitchen table, quietly devouring the breakfast you’d made. You stood nearby, fiddling with the hem of your sleeve of his shirt you had on, feeling a little shy as you tried to muster up the courage to ask him something. It felt strange—awkward, even—to invite him into something so meaningless yet so personal to you. But after the night you’d shared and the ease that had returned between you, it felt like the right thing to do.

“Hey baby…” You paused. “Would you maybe… Like…“ You took another deep breath in an attempt to try to sound more sure of yourself. “Do you want to go for a drive with me?” You finally asked, your voice hesitant. Trent paused mid-bite, looking up at you with a slight tilt of his head, encouraging you to keep going. “You’re off, and I usually like to go to Formby.” You stumbled over the words, feeling ridiculous as they tumbled out of your mouth. Trent set his fork down, his warm gaze settling on you. 

“Yeah? What do you do there?” he asked, curious and gentle, his mouth quirking up in a half-smile. You felt your cheeks warm as you struggled to explain. 

“I don’t know… I just go. It’s grounding. It helps me reset, I guess,” you admitted, unsure if he’d understand. But he didn’t push for more.

“I’ll go regardless, pretty girl,” he said with a playful smirk, “just was curious.” You couldn’t help the smile that spread across your face, his easy going nature putting you at ease. Slowly, you stepped closer, wrapping your arms around him from behind, your chin resting on his shoulder. He was warm, solid, and smelled faintly of the cologne he’d sprayed on after his shower. Trent leaned back into your embrace, his hand resting on your arm as he finished chewing. “You’re good,” he murmured reassuring you, his voice soft. “Okay, if I finish breaky first?” You hummed in agreement, the sound of his voice and the comfort of his presence washing over you. Then, to your surprise, Trent turned slightly in his chair, gently tugging at you. Before you knew it, you were perched on his lap, his arms wrapped securely around your waist. “Perfect. Now I can eat and hold you,” he teased, grinning as he grabbed his fork again. You laughed, tucking your head into the crook of his neck

 “Multitasking at its finest,” you joked back, though your heart was swelling with how easy and affectionate he was with you. For a moment, you stayed like that—wrapped up in each other, the world outside the house feeling like it didn’t exist. You’d never imagined that someone like Trent, someone so chaotic yet grounding, could fit so seamlessly into your quiet moments like this.

“Alright,” he said after a final bite, placing his fork down with a soft clink. He kissed the side of your head, his lips lingering just long enough to send a shiver down your spine. “Let’s get to Formby, yeah?” You smiled against his shoulder, nodding. 

As you stood in Trent’s room, rifling through the bits of clothing he’d left scattered on the bed, you came to a realization—you didn’t have anything to put on. A Yves Saint Laurent mini dress was hardly something that you wanted to sit on a cold north western shoreline in. You sighed, holding up one of Trent’s jumpers, oversized and impossibly soft, the faint scent of him clinging to the fabric.you shook your head trying to get away from your nagging thoughts. 

“If I wear this, will I look as cool as you?” you teased, turning to face him with a playful smile. Trent glanced up from his phone, his brow raising as he looked you over. 

“Nah… probably not,” he replied with a sly grin, leaning back against the doorframe with his arms crossed. Feigning a look of hurt, you clutched the jumper to your chest.

“Wow,” you said, your voice dripping with mock offense. He chuckled and pushed off the frame, walking over to you. 

“I’m kidding. You’re much cooler, baby,” he admitted, his grin softening as he watched you pull the jumper over your head. You tugged it into place, the hem hitting your thighs as the sleeves engulfed your hands.

“I like this though,” you murmured, adjusting the neckline and pulling it close to your skin. It was comfortable, yes, but it was more than that. It felt like him, and you didn’t want to take it off. “Can I wear it…just to the beach?” You asked. Trent hummed as his gaze lingered on you for a moment, his expression shifting into something softer. 

“Course. It suits you,” he said quietly. You smiled at his words but couldn’t ignore the thought that gnawed at the back of your mind. You wanted to keep it, to have this piece of him to carry with you. But it wasn’t like with anyone else—this wasn’t some casual boy whose clothes you could wear home without question. If you showed up at your house in Trent’s jumper, Jack would undoubtedly have something to say. Trent must’ve seen the flicker of hesitation in your eyes because he stepped closer, his hand reaching out to gently tug at the oversized sleeve. “I know, pretty girl. We’ll figure it out,” he offered simply. You wanted to ask ‘how?’ so badly, to use this one small thing to help define and clarify your entire relationship. The weight of reality had settled over you like a shadow, the stark reminder of everything complicated about the two of you neatly tucked between moments when it felt like things might finally be working.

“Okay,” you whispered softly, your fingers curling around the hem. You looked up at him, his dark eyes holding yours in a way that made your chest ache. Slowly, you nodded.  As you smoothed down the fabric, Trent reached out and tilted your chin up gently with his fingers. 

“Okay” he murmured, a playful smirk tugging at the corner of his lips, “day by day. Yeah?” He knew that this was more than just some silly jumper. He understood how much this hurt but that’s all you could do, go day by day. To rush it wasn’t smart. It didn’t make sense. You rolled your eyes, your heart lighter despite the weight of everything else. 

“Obviously,” you teased, your voice softer than before. And with that, you grabbed your bag, ready to leave pulling the sleeves over your hands feeling like it was something far more significant than just a piece of clothing. Something that tethered you to him, even as the rest of the world threatened to pull you apart.

The beach stretched out in front of you, a vast expanse of cold, pale sand meeting the endless blue-grey of the sea. The wind was brisk but refreshing, carrying the tang of saltwater and the soft cries of distant gulls. You and Trent sat on a low sand dune, the world around you quiet save for the rhythmic crash of waves breaking against the shore. You pulled his jumper over your hands again and dug your barefeet into the sand. Trent shifted beside you, his hands buried in his pockets for warmth. He glanced at you and opened his mouth…

“So, what do—” He began to speak. You stopped him gently. 

“T, it’s okay.” your voice was soft but certain. He furrowed his brow, confused for a moment, and you turned to look at him, a small smile tugging at the corner of your lips. “I know you say I yap during movies,” you teased lightly, “but you yap during moments.” You cooed gently. His mouth curved into a sheepish grin, your voice was quieter now, almost carried away by the wind. “It’s okay to just sit here and breathe.” You gestured to the horizon with a tilt of your head. “Be in the air, take in the sights, really listen to the sounds. Just… reset, you know?” Trent didn’t respond right away. He turned his attention back to the waves, the tension in his shoulders easing as he absorbed your words but you felt like you needed to explain yourself. “I just need to sit sometimes,” you added, pulling your knees to your chest and hugging them close. Your gaze swept over the sea, the endless ebb and flow grounding you in a way nothing else could. You’d come to the seaside once a month at least since your mum passed. Your dad used to bring you. You wouldn’t talk much but it just gave you two the space you so desperately needed. But even after he stopped going, you kept coming. It felt like home, a place you needed when your house at the time felt so empty.  Trent shifted closer, his knee brushing against yours. He didn’t speak, and for once, neither did you. The silence wasn’t empty; it was full—full of the crash of the waves, the rustling of the grass behind you, and the occasional whistle of the wind. You tilted your head to glance at him, and his profile was soft against the muted light of the overcast sky. His lips parted slightly, as if he were about to say something, but then he stopped himself. Instead, he leaned back on his hands, letting his eyes drift back to the horizon.

“Reset,” he echoed quietly, almost to himself. You smiled to yourself, turning back to face the waves, letting the cold air bite at your cheeks as the two of you simply sat there. The weight of the world felt lighter, here on the sand dunes, just the two of you, sharing a moment without needing to fill it with anything more than what it already was. The quiet enveloped you again, the wind whistling softly through the dunes, but soon Trent’s question broke the stillness. “Baby… what did your mum want you to tell me?” he asked gently, his voice careful but steady, his eyes fixed on you. Your breath caught in your chest, and you felt your heart skip. He felt it last night, you felt it last night, those three words looming. That lingering feeling that stemmed from the book you tried to give him when you attempted to end it all. Of course, he’d ask. It was ominous in a way. Your mum urging you to ‘tell Trent.’ But last night, your first date, you both could feel the words rising in your throats, they were desperate to come out. The love was so obviously there and sleep hadn’t cleared any of those feelings away. Trent had a way of seeing through you, even when you tried to bury things deep. The truth lingered just behind your lips, but now didn’t feel like the moment to release it.

“Erm…” you stalled, looking down at the grains of sand shifting beneath your hands as you thought. “I think she just wanted me to be brave with you,” you finally managed, your voice soft and unsteady. “I don’t think it was anything too specific.” It wasn’t a lie. But it wasn't the truth, and you both knew it. You loved Trent for years and long before this happened even your mum could see that. Trent just couldn’t be the one to cross that line. He couldn’t do it to Jack, he couldn’t put you in that position, he needed you to do it, needed to hear you say it. The look in his eyes told you he could see right through the veil of your words, but he didn’t press. Instead, he hummed softly, acknowledging the lie but choosing to let it rest for now.

“I remember once,” you began, your voice somehow even quieter now, as if sharing a memory you rarely spoke about, “I told my mum about how nice you were to me one afternoon. We were teenagers, and you bought me a hot chocolate while at a christmas market.” You smiled faintly at the memory, as Trent’s thumb brushed over your arm absently. “She asked me if I told you that. How much it meant.” You cooed.

“Did you?” He turned to look at you, curious. You shook your head with a small, rueful laugh. 

“No. When I said I hadn’t, she told me, ‘Everyone likes to know they’re… appreciated.’ I still think about that now.” You could hear your mum’s voice as you spoke her words. She didn’t say ‘appreciated’ though, she had said ‘loved’ but you couldn’t get that word out. His lips curved into a soft smile as you glanced at him. “I wish I’d taken her advice then,” you admitted, the weight of your words carrying something more. “I wish I told her more. I wish I told you more.” You sighed. You lowered your eyes, the guilt of unsaid things knotting in your chest. 

“Baby…”He exhaled as his arm tightened around you, pulling you closer as he pressed a kiss to your temple. The warmth of his lips against your skin made your eyes sting with tears. “It’s okay,” he murmured against your hair, his voice barely above a whisper. “I knew… and she definitely knew.” The words settled in your heart, bittersweet but comforting. You leaned into him, your head resting against his shoulder as the waves crashed in the distance. Neither of you spoke again for a while, but his arm stayed firmly around you, a silent promise that in this moment, you weren’t alone.

The drive away from the beach was quiet, but your mind was anything but. The ache in your chest was sharp and persistent, the kind that comes from confusion and longing tangled together. You loved Trent—you knew you loved him. So why couldn’t you just say it? Unfortunately, you knew why. You were terrified he didn’t feel the same. Terrified that once the words were out, the delicate balance you’d built together would crumble.

As the car came to a stop in his driveway, you peeled off the jumper you’d borrowed, the familiar fabric suddenly feeling too heavy on your skin. It hurt—giving it back hurt—like you were handing over a piece of him that you weren’t sure you’d get to keep. Trent wasn’t sure what to say because there was nothing to say to fix this… there were only things he could do to fix it. Trent turned to you, his eyes soft but filled with unspoken things. He didn’t take the jumper from you immediately, instead reaching out to pull you toward him, his hand firm on your hip. The motion was gentle but insistent, and before you could think, his forehead was pressed to yours.

“I’m gonna make us work, okay?” he said, his voice low and steady, a conviction behind his words that sent a shiver down your spine. You nodded, the lump in your throat making it hard to do anything else. A sniffle escaped, and he caught it, brushing a thumb across your cheek before pulling you into him for a brief, grounding hug. Believing him was all you could do because it was all you wanted. You’d dreamed of this for years, and now it was here, fragile and imperfect, but here. When the car service pulled into the driveway, your heart sank further. This wasn’t how you imagined the evening ending. Trent wanted to bring you home, you could see it in the way his eyes flickered with frustration. But you had told him it was fine, and it was. Jack would be at your place, and it just wasn’t the time—not yet. He didn’t argue, though you could feel the tension radiating off him as he walked you to the car. Before you slid inside, he kissed you in the driveway. It wasn’t a quick, casual goodbye; it was all-consuming. The kind of kiss that stole your breath, that made you feel like the ground beneath you didn’t exist. You clung to him for a moment, wishing the car would disappear, wishing you could just stay wrapped in him and let everything else fade away. But eventually, you pulled back, his hands reluctantly dropping to his sides. As you slid into the back seat of the car, the cool leather of the seats pressed against your bare thighs, a harsh reminder of reality. Through the window, you caught one last look at him—standing there, hands in his pockets, watching as the car pulled away. He looked as reluctant to let you go as you felt. The ache in your chest deepened, but somewhere in the back of your mind, his words echoed. And you had to hold onto that because it was the only thing keeping the ache from completely taking over.

You walked into the kitchen after a shower late in the day, the faint hum of voices reaching your ears as you approached. Jack was just ending a phone call, his tone sounded curt.

“Alright, mate. Talk later,” he said and hung up. Across the room, Noah sat at the island, casually picking at a plate of food, his posture relaxed as though he’d been there for a while. Jack turned to Noah with a furrowed brow, a look of mild irritation shadowing his face. “Have you heard anything from Trentski lately?” he asked, leaning against the counter with crossed arms.

“Not too much. Why?” Noah shrugged, chewing slowly, his mouth full mumbling his words together.

“He’s been off with me,” Jack said, his voice edged with frustration. “Even just now on the phone, he sounded so… standoffish. He’s been like this for a while now. I don’t know what his problem is.” You froze mid-step, pretending to fidget with something on the counter as you silently listened. Your pulse quickened, and you avoided meeting their eyes, praying your face wouldn’t betray you. Noah tilted his head thoughtfully. 

“Yeah, he has been a bit off,” he said, as if just realizing it himself. “But, you know Trent. The only time he ever really retreats like this is when he’s being pissy about something. He’s not an open book.” Noah smirked looking for a joke. But Jack only sighed, rubbing the back of his neck. 

“Right? But, bro, it feels targeted at me… like if I’ve done something lad, just say it. But no, he has to act all cryptic and moody. What’s his deal?” Jack asked openly, getting a bit frustrated with Trent’s growing resistance towards him. Where did his best friend go? Noah hesitated, a small smirk pulling at his lips before he continued.

 “Well… I mean, I did hear him talking with someone the other night,” he said casually, leaning back in his chair. Jack perked up. 

“What do you mean? Like on the phone?” He asked earnestly.

“Yeah, mate,” Noah replied, shaking his head in disbelief recalling the scene. “It was when we were all over at my place for that movie night. He stepped into the kitchen and I walked in on him on the phone. He was talking to a girl—but it was clearly more than some link to him.” Your stomach dropped, the knot of anxiety in your chest tightening. You wondered if this was the call with you. You assumed it was unless he had called someone after for reprieve. You’d hoped not, so you listened carefully. You kept your movements deliberate and slow, opening a cupboard and pretending to inspect its contents, though you were barely processing what was in front of you.

“A girl?” Jack asked, raising an eyebrow. Noah nodded. 

“Bro….” he cautioned him as if to prepare Jack for how Trent was acting on this call. “Yeah, mate. And he sounded different, too—like… nervous. Almost sweet, if you can believe it. I didn’t think much of it, he was being sus, wouldn’t let me in but now? I dunno, I think Trent’s in deep that’s why he’s not around.” He explained.

“In deep?” Jack repeated, laughing. “Come on, mate. It’s Trent. The guy doesn’t do deep.” Noah laughed along with him.

“That’s what I thought so it didn’t track at first. I just couldn’t wrap my head around it - where did he find a bird he’s like this with. But I’m serious. I think he’s caught feelings. Jack… mate, I mean it, from what I witnessed he might even have proper feelings for this girl. He was a mess.” Noah laughed reminiscing on the sheer joy he felt watching ever composed Trent fumble over his words on the phone. But then the two of them burst out laughing, the idea seemingly too absurd for them to fathom. 

“Nah, not Trenty. Not a chance.” Jack shook his head, still chuckling. “We would've met the girl,” he added. But their laughter barely registered as your heart sank. Their words lingered, each one hitting you like a stone sinking deeper into the pit of your stomach. You could feel the heat rising to your cheeks, and your hands trembled slightly as you gripped the counter. You glanced over your shoulder just enough to catch Jack shaking his head again. “He’d tell me if it was serious,” he said, his voice confident. “Wouldn’t he?” Noah shrugged noncommittally, and Jack turned his attention back to whatever was in front of him. You couldn’t shake the weight pressing down on your chest, the mix of emotions swirling inside you—fear, guilt, and a growing sense of hopelessness. The way they dismissed the idea of Trent being in love felt like a slap to the face, a cruel reminder of how precarious everything had been and yet simultaneously how meaningless. Would this ultimately just end up being a secret you’d have to take to the grave, the few months you got with your brother’s best friend. It all made you so angry. You wanted to scream, to storm out of the kitchen, to do something, anything, but instead, you stayed frozen in place, clinging to the façade that nothing was wrong. You reached up to grab a glass from the cabinet, trying to keep your movements calm and steady despite the weight of their conversation. Jack, leaning against the island, folded his arms as he pressed further. “Was it that girl Jess?” he asked, his tone sharp. “You know, Meg’s friend, the last one he was hooking up with? She was around his for a bit, wasn’t she?” The mention of another name—Jess—had your stomach twisting in knots, the glass slipping from your fingers. It shattered against the tile floor, the loud crash jolting all three of you. “Jesus, Y/N!” Jack whipped around, his eyes wide with alarm. “You good?” He asked with genuine concern looking at the shards scattered around your feet. A visual representation of your life at the minute, he could never understand.

“Sorry!” you stammered, kneeling quickly to pick up the pieces, your hands shaking. “I wasn’t paying attention. Sorry, sorry I’ll clean it up.” You babbled nervously as your hands shook. Jack rolled his eyes, muttering something about you being careless, while Noah leaned over slightly, glancing down at you. He tried to move the conversation forward, his voice lighthearted as if to brush past your blunder. Nothing too deep, people drop things.

“Nah, it wasn’t Jess,” Noah said, laughing a little as he kept picking at his food. “This girl has him fucked up, mate. Like, completely different vibe.” He explained.

“What do you mean?” Jack’s interest was piqued. 

“I mean,” Noah began, leaning back in his chair, “I heard him that night. He wasn’t just trying to get her to come over. He was begging for her to stay. He sounded desperate, almost scared she wouldn’t. I’m telling you mate. He was a mess.” Noah further explained to Jack.  You froze, your breath catching in your throat as the words sank in. The shards of glass in your hand suddenly felt sharper, more dangerous. Noah continued, oblivious to the effect his words were having on you. “Apparently, this is the girl, mate. He told me, like, the one. Dream girl status. He’s in love with her.” Noah emphasized word. The idea of love sent a shockwave through you. 

“Fuck.” You whimpered carelessly as your hand slipped against a jagged edge of glass, and you winced as a sharp sting sliced through your skin.

“Shit, Y/N!” Noah exclaimed, leaning forward. “You alright?” You nodded quickly, shaking your head as if to clear the haze in your mind.

“I’m fine,” you said, your voice unsteady. “Just—just a little cut. I’ll clean it up.”

“You’re bleeding everywhere,” Jack said, grabbing a tea towel and tossing it in your direction quickly, nervous you might bleed out by the time he got over to you. “Be careful, for fuck’s sake. You promise you’re okay?” He asked seriously, moving towards you now faster from the other side of the room. Noah still looked concerned, but you waved them both off, standing up and wrapping your finger in the towel. 

“It’s nothing,” you mumbled, grabbing the broom with your uninjured hand. “I’ve got it.” You waved Jack off so he gave you the space. But your mind wasn’t on the mess. It was on Noah’s words. Trent was in love? The realization hit you like a punch to the gut, leaving you dizzy and disoriented. Could it really be you he was talking about? Noah knew Trent like the back of his hand… he’d know how Trent really felt about someone. Was this the call with you… or maybe worse, was this a call with someone else—someone like Jess, someone who wasn’t tangled up in a web of secrets and guilt? You stole a glance at Jack, who was already back distracted by his phone, completely unaware of the storm raging inside you. Noah, meanwhile, had gone back to his food, the conversation now drifting into casual banter. But you couldn’t focus. All you could think about was Trent. Was this real? Could he really feel that way about you? And if he did… what did it mean for everything else? For Jack? For you? You swallowed hard, the cut on your finger forgotten as the weight of it all settled on your chest.

The boy Devon, the Manchester United player, Josh’s friend, that you spotted at dinner wasted no time, spinning the scene he’d witnessed like a web of intrigue. Seeing you and Trent at dinner together had been unexpected, even puzzling. On its own, it might’ve been easily dismissed—after all, you and Trent had history, you knew each other through Jack and people could convince themselves it was merely friendly. But there was something about the way Trent looked at you that night, a softness, a protectiveness that the boy hadn’t missed. It planted a seed, one that began to grow in the back of his mind and one he was ready to share with your ex. When saw Josh next, he was ready for his opportunity to stir the pot

“You’ll never guess who I saw the other night,” Devon said, leaning against a locker with a smirk. “Mate… Y/N L/N and Trent Alexander-Arnold. At dinner.” Josh’s head whipped around at the mention of your name. 

“What?” he asked sharply, his voice betraying a flicker of interest despite himself.

“At dinner,” Devon repeated, dragging it out for effect. “Looked cozy too. Candlelit table, just the two of them.” Josh frowned, his jaw tightening. 

“C’mon. Bro, I know I said shit about her before but they’re friends. She’s Jack’s sister. That’s been her thing for years. He’s never gone for it.” Josh explained having a hard time wrapping his head around it. He knew you wanted Trent, he could even see the way Trent wanted you but it actually happening… and not behind closed doors? Out in public? It seemed so farfetched.

“Maybe,” Devon said with a shrug, though his smirk didn’t waver. “But you know, sometimes even the nice ones… snap. He didn’t look like a ‘just friends’ kind of guy to me. Looked like he finally realized what was right in front of him.” He smugly told Josh. Josh tried to laugh it off, but there was an edge to it, sharp and bitter. 

“Whatever, mate. She’s not my problem anymore.” He muttered.

“Sure,” Devon replied smoothly, though he didn’t believe it for a second. He could see the flicker of annoyance in Josh’s eyes, the remnants of a claim Josh still felt over you, no matter how fractured things had been between you. “So you wouldn’t believe a photo of them then?” Devon smirked flashing him the photo he took on his screen. Josh jumped to grab the phone, shocked. He inspected the photo fuming. Devon snatched his phone back out of his hands “Looks pretty fucking friendly to me, mate.” He smugly laughed as he turned to leave the room. But Josh couldn’t leave it there, he had seen it, he needed more information, he needed more… ammunition. As Devon walked away, his words echoed in Josh’s mind. Trent and Y/N? At dinner? It was almost laughable, except it wasn’t. Josh had known you long enough to know how deep your feelings for Trent ran, even when you tried to hide it. And if Trent had finally reciprocated? He hated the thought, he hated the photo, he hated that Trent’s waiting game won out. It made him sick. He pushed you to Trent and then as a lump formed in his throat, his anger towards you shoved it down. He hated you for choosing Trent. Cynicism crept in, laced with exasperation and a thirst for vengeance. He remembered the sting of your split, the way things ended and why, and how easily you seemed to fall into the waiting arms of Trent—at least in his eyes. And now, you two were parading around together? It wasn’t about love or loss anymore. It was about pride, about the idea of someone like Trent waltzing into his old territory without so much as a second thought. Josh began to piece together a plan. If Trent thought he could take you out of Josh’s life and into his unnoticed, he was wrong. And if you thought this could stay secret, you were wrong too. A wicked grin spread across Josh’s face as he envisioned the chaos it might cause when Jack found out. How much it would hurt you, hurt Trent. He didn’t care if he and Devon were wrong, if it was just ‘friendly.’ The perception alone would be enough. Josh grabbed his phone, thumbing through his contacts until he landed on Jack’s name. He didn’t press call—not yet. He needed to get the photo first and timing was everything, and he intended to make sure this landed perfectly.  After all, what better way to even the score than to drop a bombshell like this?

The gossip about Trent seeing someone began to brew more and more each day. Evidently, seeping beyond just Jack and Noah but into other friend groups.  You were out at the shops just stopping to pick up a few things when you spotted Megan and Jess as you rounded the corner of the produce aisle, their voices reaching you before their faces did. Megan was pleasant, flashing you a smile when she saw you, but Jess’s expression was harder to read. Her eyes lingered on you, sharp and curious, as if she was sizing you up.

“Y/N!” Megan greeted, her tone light and cheerful. “Didn’t expect to see you here. Haven’t seen you in a minute, probably since the other week at the birthday.” You offered a polite smile, adjusting the strap of your bag on your shoulder.

“Yeah, course. Hi. I’m just picking up a few things.” You cooed softly. The conversation started innocently enough. Megan talked about Jack, about her plans for the weekend, and you nodded along, trying to keep your responses short. But then, the conversation shifted.

“So,” Megan said casually, “we’ve heard rumblings that Trent’s seeing someone.” Her words hit you like a freight train. A part of you was instinctively annoyed at your brother just imagining him complaining to Megan about Trent and relaying Noah’s information spilled in the kitchen. You didn’t know if that was who told her but you could imagine. Your grip on your bag tightened, but you forced your face to remain neutral. 

“Yeah? I wouldn’t know,” you said quickly, hoping the lie sounded believable.

“Hmm,” Jess hummed, a small smirk tugging at her lips. Her skepticism was evident, and you could feel her eyes burning into you. She didn’t believe you for a second. Megan tilted her head, clearly confused by your answer. 

“I mean, you two are close though, aren’t you? You’re always with the boys! I feel like you’d hear or I’d think he’d tell you even.” She smiled sincerely. If Megan was being honest she knew you had a crush on Trent, it was glaringly obvious but she wasn’t going to hurt you and call you out on it. Besides, her friend Jess liked him, she was just looking for intel. You hesitated, trying to keep your voice steady. 

“I guess… I mean, if he wasn’t, I’m sure he’d reach out or something. I don’t really know what’s going on with him right now.” You babbled awkwardly. You didn’t know what to say really. But what you did say…was a rookie mistake. You realized it the moment the words left your mouth. Jess’s smirk widened, and Megan’s eyebrows shot up.

“So he is seeing someone,” Megan said slowly, her confusion deepening. “Because he definitely hasn’t reached out to Jess.” She glanced at her friend, then back at you, as if trying to piece together a puzzle. Megan knew you liked Trent but from the lens of a little sister liking her older brother’s friend- nothing more. She wasn’t being cynical or mean she was just looking for information. And right now she was with Jess, who hadn’t shut up about Trent falling off the grid for months. Your cheeks burned, and you felt your chest tighten. You opened your mouth to respond, but no words came. Instead, you fumbled with your shopping bags, pretending they were suddenly too heavy to manage.

“Erm, I really don’t know,” you said, your voice shaky. “Sorry, I’ve got to go—running late.” Without waiting for a response, you darted away, your heart pounding as you put as much distance between yourself and them as possible. You could feel their eyes on you as you turned the corner, and you didn’t dare look back. The encounter left you rattled. You gripped your bags tightly, replaying the exchange in your head as you hurried down the street, your heart pounding. Megan’s raised eyebrows, Jess’s sharp, knowing glances—it all felt like a storm you weren’t prepared for. Their words echoed in your mind. ‘So he’s seeing someone.’ They didn’t know it was you, but the realization and possibility that they were piecing it together made your stomach churn. Jess’s skepticism had been palpable, her eyes narrowing like she already suspected the truth but was waiting for you to slip. You sighed as you reached your car, fumbling with the keys. Why had you even tried to lie? It wasn’t like you were good at it, and the awkward babbling only made things worse. But what were you supposed to do? Confirm it? Out yourself? Out Trent? That wasn’t an option either. But why did he want it secret? You guessed it was good Jess hadn’t heard from him. But how long had it been? Was there in overlap? As you sat in the driver’s seat, gripping the steering wheel, you couldn’t shake the feeling that the walls were closing in. The more the gossip spread, the harder it would be to keep your relationship under wraps. The thought of Jack finding out this way—through whispers and rumors—made you feel sick.

You thought about texting Trent, maybe to warn him or just to vent, but even that felt risky. Instead, you took a deep breath and tried to steady yourself. This was the price of keeping things a secret, wasn’t it? The constant worry, the careful balancing act, the fear that one slip could send it all crashing down. And yet, despite it all, you knew you couldn’t stay away from him. Trent was worth it. At least, you hoped he was. You hoped he thought the same about you, that he wouldn’t falter under the pressure building around you both. As you pulled out of the parking lot, you tried to shake off the anxiety, telling yourself it would all blow over. But deep down, you knew this was only the beginning. The gossip wasn’t going to stop, and neither, it seemed, was the tension.

It felt surreal, wearing Trent’s jersey to a home game at Anfield. He’d given it to you weeks ago, but when you finally were all going to a match, he officially asked you to wear it tonight, it felt different—more deliberate, more intimate. The weight of it wasn’t just fabric; it was a claim, a silent declaration that you were his. The box was buzzing with energy as you sat with Jack, Noah, Layla, Megan, Trent’s family, and more of their friends, all of them in good spirits after the game started. But the teasing was relentless, especially from Noah.

“Big statement, Y/N,” he quipped, eyeing the bolded double barreled surname and number on your back. Everyone’s eyes flickered towards you as you took off your coat. You rolled your eyes. 

“Wait… When did you get the new kit? What the fuck… I wanted one.” Jack snapped annoyed. But then Megan spoke over him. She leaned over squeezing your leg kindly. 

“Don’t let the cameras catch that. You’ll start rumors.” Megan laughed as Noah chuckled, shaking his head. You forced a laugh, shrugging off their remarks, but your cheeks burned under their scrutiny. You turned to continue your conversation with Layla praying they’d drop the whole thing. They had no idea what the jersey truly meant, and part of you relished that secrecy, even as you squirmed under their playful jabs. 

The game flew by in a blur of cheering, tension, and stolen glances at the man on the pitch. Trent looked up toward the box once or twice, and though his focus remained on the match, you could feel his presence even from afar. It wasn’t just a jersey; it was a tether, a connection that made your chest swell with pride every time his name echoed through the stadium.When the final whistle blew and the crowd erupted but then a bit after that… your phone buzzed quietly in your lap.

'Meet me outside the box. I need to see you properly in that kit, baby.'

Your heart skipped, and you swallowed down a smile. Glancing around, you tried to look nonchalant as you slipped your phone into your pocket and stood.

“I’ll be right back,” you said casually, already heading toward the door. “Bathroom or something.” Jack barely acknowledged you, too wrapped up in conversation with Megan and their friends. Layla smirked as you stepped out of the box and into the quieter halls, your footsteps quickening as you made your way to the exit. The moment you saw him coming down the corridor, your heart skipped. He looked effortlessly striking in his tracksuit, exhaustion etched across his features, but the instant his eyes landed on you, a flash of pure happiness lit up his face. Before you could say a word, he closed the distance, pulling you into his arms in a tight, possessive embrace. His warmth surrounded you, and you buried your face into the curve of his neck, inhaling the familiar, comforting scent of him. 

"You played so well," you murmured, your words muffled by his skin as you pressed soft kisses to his neck.

"Yeah?" he asked, his voice low and filled with something deeper. His hands came up to gently cup your face, tilting it so your eyes met.

"Yeah," you confirmed with a shy smile. "Were you trying to impress someone?" you teased, watching as his lips curved into a smirk.

"Maybe," he said, his thumb brushing along your cheek. "Depends. Did I?" He asked. You giggled, nodding as your arms looped around his waist. His hands slid down your sides, firm and deliberate, until they rested on your hips. He tugged you closer, the heat of his body sending a rush of warmth through you. "You look so good tonight," he said, his voice dropping to a husky whisper. His eyes dropped to the jersey you wore-his jersey—and his fingers toyed with the hem. "Fuck me, I like you in this. But I wish I wasn't absolutely knackered, 'cause all I can think about is taking it off you." A teasing grin tugged at your lips as you slipped your hands around his waist, finding the drawstrings of his joggers. 

"I can take care of you tonight, don’t worry, baby," you whispered, your fingers grazing his skin beneath the fabric. "I could even take this off for you." His breath hitched, and he hummed appreciatively, leaning down to press his lips to your neck. His kisses were lazy, languid, and filled with an unspoken promise. He bit down gently, making you gasp, before soothing the spot with his tongue.

"Keep talking like that, and we’re gonna leave right now," he murmured against your skin, his hands slipping under the hem of the jersey to brush against your bare back. You laughed softly, reluctantly pulling back. 

"We should go back inside before they come looking for us." you smiled sympathetically at him. He groaned, his forehead resting against yours.

"You're lucky I'm too tired otherwise you’d be halfway to my bed right now" he teased, but his hands lingered on your hips as you pulled away. 

“I’ll be in your bed in a bit, okay?” You smirked with a cheeky grin. He hummed in response as you turned, his eyes watching your every move like you were the only thing in the world he needed. As you both made your way back to the suite, you couldn't help but feel the imprint of his touch, every whisper of his affection lingering on your skin.

After the match, the usual buzz of a big win had everyone making loose plans to head out, but Trent’s firm 'nah' shifted the momentum. Slowly, the group began to disband, everyone falling back into their own routines. You lingered in the suite as people trickled out, catching Trent’s eye. When you leaned in to hug him goodbye, you buried your face into his neck, the familiar warmth and scent of him grounding you. 

“Still want me to come over, or are you too tired?” You asked softly, whispering into his ear. He hummed against your hair, his voice low and barely audible. 

“Mmhmm please.” The moment stretched just a little too long, just a little too close, and when you finally pulled back, it was enough for Noah to pipe up.

“Ermmm… that was fucking weird, bro. Let go of her,” he laughed, his voice breaking the intimate bubble you’d created with Trent. You tried to play it cool, smoothing your expression. 

“What? A cuddle?” you said, feigning innocence.

“Yeah,” he laughed with Noah. “Y/N, are you drunk?” Jack asked you jokingly citing the only time you and Trent were that affectionate was at parties after tequila shots and lowered inhibitions. He leaned against Megan with a raised brow. “Why are you throwing yourself at him like that?” He asked a bit more earnestly and the tension sharpened, the air suddenly heavy. You could feel the blood rush to your cheeks, but before you could scramble for a response, Layla swooped in.

“Jesus, just kiss already,” she teased, swatting playfully at Trent with an exaggerated roll of her eyes. Her comment hit like a match to dry kindling. The room erupted in laughter, the tension instantly diffused. You shot her a grateful smile as she grinned back knowingly. “Coming to stay with me tonight,” Layla said, still half-laughing but with a subtle edge of sincerity, offering the perfect cover. “We’ll have a girls’ night. Do a face mask or whatever.” Trent smirked but said nothing, letting Layla’s quick wit take the spotlight. The group moved on, their teasing fading as they returned to casual chatter. The room felt lighter again, and you knew you owed Layla for smoothing over what could’ve been a minefield. As everyone packed up and started heading out, Trent caught your eye again, a quiet promise lingering between you both.

The drive home was quiet at first, the soft hum of the radio filling the silence between you and Layla. But you could feel her glances, her curiosity practically brimming over.

“So… what’s going on with you and Trent? Post-date, I mean.” She finally asked. You sighed, resting your head against the window. 

“It was meant to be good,” you began, your voice low, “but it feels just like before, especially tonight. Just hidden. I thought we were ready to move forward, you know?” Layla frowned, her tone gentle but probing. 

“So what’s stopping you?” You hesitated, the words heavy on your tongue. 

“I don’t know,” you admitted. “Lay, what if I don’t want it? Not like this. Sometimes… sometimes I feel like I’m the one pulling him into the shadows, like we’re both doing this to each other. Hiding.  Like he’s subtle but I’m… hiding. And now, with Josh’s friend Devon… seeing us at dinner—God, I’m terrified.” Her face softened as she glanced at you, one hand briefly leaving the wheel to give your knee a reassuring squeeze.

 “It’ll be okay,” she said gently. “It’s just going to take time, yeah? You and Trent have always had this… thing. You guys have communicated so long with no words, going off glances but now… things have to change. You’ll figure it out.” You nodded, but her words only soothed the surface. The knots in your stomach refused to untangle. By the time you arrived at Trent’s house, the air between you and him felt thick. Not with anger—no, it wasn’t that—but with emotion. Too much, all at once.

The tension wasn’t hostile, but it was heavy. You both cared so deeply for one another, but the weight of it was beginning to show, even behind closed doors where no one else could see. When you crawled into bed with him that night, there was no talk of passion or promises. No desperate moves to bridge the gap between your feelings and your fears. Instead, you simply held each other. His arms wrapped around you, pulling you close as he tucked his chin over your head. 

“I’ve got you,” he whispered, his voice a low murmur. You didn’t respond, but you didn’t need to. You nestled into him, letting his warmth soothe the ache in your chest. Everything about that moment should have been perfect. The way his heartbeat steadied your breathing, the way his hands absentmindedly rubbed circles into your back. And yet, nothing was. You fell asleep tangled together, but the ache of what wasn’t said lingered.

Noah was throwing a party. He had tossed you and Layla the usual invites you’d come to expect to receive. The music pulsed through his house, spilling out onto the lawn as you and Layla stepped inside. The scene was much bigger than you anticipated—people were crammed into every corner, the laughter and chatter nearly deafening. Layla raised a skeptical brow as you glanced at each other. You shrugged. Noah’s usual ‘small gathering’ had clearly spiraled into something else.

“Aye, you alright?” Trent’s voice cut through the crowd. He spotted you almost immediately, a grin spreading across his face. You’d been texting all day, but nothing substantial had changed between you. The limbo of your relationship was still palpable, and yet, seeing him now, your heart skipped a beat.

“Yeah, all good,” you replied sweetly with a small smile, though you couldn’t ignore the butterflies in your stomach. Layla folded her arms, glancing around at the sheer number of people. 

“Didn’t know the whole squad would be here,” she muttered, clearly unimpressed. Trent gave her a cheeky hug, a quick and friendly gesture, before turning his attention fully to you. His arms wrapped around you in a much tighter, longer embrace, swaying slightly with a hum as he leaned into you. His scent—faint cologne mixed with the sharp tang of alcohol—was intoxicating.

“Missed you, baby,” you whispered in his ear, your teeth pulling on his earlobe, your words soft, just for him. Before you could step back, he tightened his grip, pulling you impossibly closer. His lips brushed against your ear, and he murmured something low, too quiet for anyone else to hear.

“Look so sexy. Gonna let me fuck you in the toilet again, yeah?” He cheekily whispered. It was more of a tease then an actual ask but then again, maybe it wasn’t. Your eyes widened briefly at his words, but you nodded, the corners of your mouth twitching into a smile. Layla tugged at the back of your top, signaling for you to let go of him, because you had no plans to, but you barely moved. Trent’s arms lingered around you for just a moment longer before he reluctantly pulled away, a satisfied smirk on his lips as he met your gaze one last time.

“What did he say?” Layla asked under her breath, watching you carefully. You shook your head with a small laugh, brushing it off. 

“Nothing,” you lied, though your cheeks betrayed you with a warm flush. Layla gave you a knowing look but didn’t press further, letting the moment settle as the party surged on around you. 

Trent stood slightly off to the side of his friends, arms crossed and his focus split. Noah was with him, cracking jokes as always, but the boy beside them—Bailey—was an unfamiliar face, part of a wider circle of acquaintances that Trent didn’t know well. What started as idle conversation quickly shifted the moment Bailey’s attention landed on you across the room.Bailey’s jaw slackened, his eyes fixed on you in a way that made Trent’s stomach churn. His discomfort was immediate, though he kept his face neutral, following Bailey’s gaze. You were talking to Layla, smiling brightly, your hand gesturing animatedly as you spoke.

“She’s certainly not ugly,” Noah noticing, quipped with a laugh, slapping Bailey on the back.

“She’s so fit, mate,” Bailey added, his voice dripping with awe. “Fucks sake, mate. Any of you get with her?” Trent’s jaw tightened at the audacity of the question, but Noah—always quick to stir the pot—grinned and threw in a jab.

“Trenty wishes,” Noah smirked, throwing a few playful punches at Trent’s arm. “But he’s got a new bird now apparently. So what’s going on there with Y/N then? I thought you'd take her up on the offer eventually.”

“Nah, don’t say that. Jack would kill me, you know that,” Trent shot back quickly, his voice steady despite the unease settling in his chest. He knew bringing up Jack was the easiest way to shut the conversation down, but it wasn’t the full truth. Bailey frowned, looking between them in confusion. 

“You lot don’t think about her that way?” he asked, incredulous.

“I mean, course,” Trent admitted instinctively fast and drunkenly, the words slipping out before he could stop them. He immediately wanted to hit himself. Noah, catching the crack in Trent’s usual composure, smirked smugly. 

“Jack’s not here tonight, lad. It’s your limited window. You’re telling me you don’t notice the way she acts around you? Notice the way she looks?” Noah’s cheek was growing and Tren’t resolve was dwindling. He let out a long sigh, his gaze drifting back to you as you tilted your head back with a laugh at something Layla said. The warm overhead lights danced over your skin, making you look radiant. His chest ached with longing, the lie he lived burning in his throat.

“I mean, yeah. She’s beautiful,” Trent said softly, almost to himself.

“Beautiful?” Bailey barked out a laugh. “She’s fucking fit. Got a body on her.” Trent’s jaw clenched so hard it hurt as he scanned your body over the same way Bailey was, from the tip of your boots to the top of your head, desire on both of their minds.

“Erm, yeah, mate.” Trent’s eyes narrowed. “She’s something,” he said quietly, shaking his head in frustration. Noah, sensing the tension, pressed further, his voice full of teasing delight.

“Trent knows her well,” he told Bailey, grinning. Trent scoffed, trying to brush it off. “You do!” Noah yelped. “Bro, you’re the only one she sits with. The only one she lets touch her. And no one says anything. C’mon, Trenty, stop playing nice. Tell the lad about her.” Noah prodded pushing Trent to tell Bailey how great you were knowing it’d be hard for him. 

“Nah, mate. I guess, I don’t know,” Trent muttered, forcing the words out in a desperate attempt to end the conversation. But his chest tightened, the weight of his feelings—so much more than Noah or Bailey could understand—bearing down on him. Just then, their other friend, Aidan, walked over, draping an arm around Trent. The distraction was welcome, but it didn’t erase the pit of frustration and yearning brewing inside him. He couldn’t stand this conversation, couldn’t stand Bailey’s gawking, couldn’t stand the charade. Trent’s eyes flicked back to you, his heart thudding as he watched you smile. You were oblivious to the storm swirling in him, but he couldn’t stop himself from feeling like tonight was another reminder of just how much he hated hiding.

“We talking Jack’s sister? Yeah, I won’t lie boys, she’s leng. Come on, you know she’s good in bed as well,” Aidan added casually, his voice slurring slightly with the weight of too many drinks. Trent winced, the comment hitting him like a sharp jab.

“What? Have you?” he asked, his tone panicked and defensive, betraying the calm facade he’d been trying to maintain.

“No, I wish,” Aidan laughed, oblivious to Trent’s reaction. “I mean, you can just tell though.”

“Yeah, you can tell,” Bailey chimed in with a smirk, his eyes lingering on you from across the room. “But mate, it seems like she’s into you. I saw you hug her when she came in.”  Trent’s heart rate picked up, and he struggled to keep his expression neutral.

 “Probably the only one she’d let have a cuddle in that fit,” Noah laughed, throwing fuel on the fire watching you adjust the hem of your mini skirt knowing you’d wouldn't let just any boy put their hands on you when you were out.

“I don’t know how you practice this much restraint if you're already in,” Bailey said, shaking his head in disbelief. Trent swallowed hard, his jaw clenching as Aidan cut back in, leaning slightly closer to Trent as if to confide some secret.

“Seriously, I don’t know how you do it, bro. She always struts around us in nothing." He then looked at Noah and Bailey. "I think she likes the attention, but we all know she likes Trenty’s attention the most.” The words twisted in Trent’s gut like a knife. He hated the way they spoke about you, the casual objectification of someone they knew so well yet also barely knew beyond the surface, the way he did.

“Eh, don’t know lads. She’s just chill. I don’t think she thinks about it,” Trent said, forcing his voice to stay steady.

“Come on,” Noah rolled his eyes, annoyed that even in his drunk state, Trent wouldn’t falter. But Trent couldn’t falter, not here, not now. He knew the boys had always talked shit like this at parties, tossing your name into the mix like you were some topic for debate. Normally, he brushed it off, participating but choosing to stay silent when it came to you rather than feed into it. But tonight, it felt different. The way they lingered, the way they openly dissected the dynamics between you and him—it was too real, too close to everything he was trying so hard to protect. The bitterness welled up in his chest, the laughter around him grating on his nerves. He wanted to say something, to shut it down, but any slip of the truth would only add more fuel to their relentless teasing. So instead, he stood there, silent, his fists clenching at his sides, wishing he could pull you out of this party and into a space where none of these people and their drunken commentary could touch you.

You caught Trent’s gaze across the room, and the intensity of his stare made your cheeks flush. His lips quirked into a soft smile, but the cool, effortless demeanor he carried around everyone else seemed to dissolve under your gaze. Layla caught the exchange instantly, smirking as she raised her hand in an exaggerated wave at him. Trent waved back with a charm that felt deliberate, but even Layla could tell he was unraveling.

“God, you’ve got him absolutely gone,” she teased, nudging you with her shoulder. “Whatever you do in bed with him has him a mess. He can’t even pretend anymore, before at least he had a poker face.” She laughed. You rolled your eyes, but the warmth spreading through your chest was undeniable.

“Come on,” you said, grabbing Layla’s hand and weaving through the crowded room toward the boys.

“Hiyaaa!” Layla purred as you reached the group, giving Noah and Aidan hugs and introducing herself to Bailey with her usual flair. But before you could even exchange pleasantries, Trent was there, sliding his arm around your waist in a way that was both subtle and unmistakably possessive, keeping you from getting even in touching distance of the other boys. His fingers dipped into the back of your skirt refusing to let you even try to create space between you. The contact sent a shiver through you, grounding you in his presence. You leaned into him not wanting any space, your lips brushing against the shell of his ear as you whispered something cheeky, just for him. Whatever you said made his grin spread wider, his confidence returning as he pulled you closer.

“Gonna drive you home, hmm?” he murmured aloud, his voice low but loud enough for the others to hear. It was casual, a simple blanket statement, that he’d said a million times to you, but the promise hidden in his tone made your heart race. You glanced up at him, your eyes sparkling with mischief.

 “Maybe,” you teased back, biting your lip to keep from smiling too wide. Layla smirked at the exchange, watching Trent’s usual composure crack further.

“Nah.” He pulled on your skirt’s waist again bringing you tighter into him. “I said… I’m gonna drive you home. Alright?” Trent commandingly told you. The boys watched on in disbelief but you and Trent remained in your bubble, his hand never leaving your waist as the rest of the world faded into background noise. Bailey's jaw dropped as he took in the moment.

"Bro, they have to bang, no?" he blurted out, completely bewildered by the quiet intimacy playing out before him. Layla shrugged nonchalantly but bit her tongue to keep from saying anything.

"If l even put my hand near her, she'd call me bro and swat me away," Noah laughed, gesturing toward you. "But Trent? Nah, he gets to do whatever he wants. Got that pretty boy privilege. We've got a different thing happening here."

"Yeah, mate, he's got the green light. I don't know what he's waiting for," Aiden chimed in, his tone teetering between disbelief and amusement. Bailey blinked, staring intently as Trent's hand casually disappeared under your top, his fingers gliding softly over your stomach. It wasn't showy or bold, but the gesture was undeniably intimate.

"Wait, did he just—" Bailey started, his eyes wide as he turned to the group. "His hand is under her clothes right now. Is this happening? Lads… is this a thing? Have I just been talking about his girl the whole time?" He looked to Aiden and Noah for answers, as if they were the only ones who might hold the key to what was clearly more than just a casual friendship. Layla sighed, debating whether to tell the boys to mind their own business, but before she could speak, Noah interjected, smirking.

"Not his girl officially haha. I think he just likes the game." He smugly said. Layla snapped her head toward Noah, her eyes narrowing in irritation. The comment, whether a joke or not, grated on her. The idea that you could ever be seen as a game to Trent made her blood boil.

"That's not funny, Noah," she said firmly, her tone sharp enough to make him pause. "They’re friends. That’s how T’s always been with her.” She snapped. Noah took a deep breath of understanding. It wasn’t a joke. Even as much stick as everyone gave you and Trent, no one ever meant any mal intent by it. He knew you had a crush on Trent. He would never want Trent to mess with you like that.

“I know, Lay… sorry. It’s only jokes. They’re mates.” Noah responded awkwardly. Not because of Layla but because he would never want to offend you. The group fell into quiet hums of spectators for a moment but none of them could tear their eyes away from the two of you. Trent's attention remained solely on you, his hand moving in a way that felt both protective and adoring, and it was clear to anyone watching-this wasn't a game for him.

“Aye, lads… I’m gonna drive Y/N home,” Trent announced casually, though the way his arm tightened around your waist betrayed his eagerness. You, tipsy and giggling, clung to his side, completely oblivious to the knowing looks bouncing around the group.

“Yeah, sure,” Bailey laughed, his tone dripping with sarcasm. “Driving her home. Right.” Trent ignored his comment but it wasn't so easy.

“Tonight’s it, lad,” Aiden whispered, gripping Trent’s shoulder with a cheeky grin. His voice was low, but the teasing intent was unmistakable. Trent shook his head, fighting the urge to roll his eyes, but the smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth was impossible to hide. To redirect the attention and save face, Trent turned to Layla.

“Lays you want a ride too?” He offered, His voice was kind, but the question was almost rhetorical. Layla waved him off immediately.

 “Nah, I’m good. Noah’s got me,” she replied with a knowing smirk, her eyes darting between the two of you. Noah raised a brow, caught off guard.

 “I do?” he asked, but when Layla shot him a pointed look, he shrugged and leaned into the moment. “Yeah, shit, sorry, sure. Yeah, I do. Always happy to help.” His smug grin only grew as he watched you and Trent prepare to leave together. The group watched as Trent guided you toward the door, his hand never leaving the small of your back. As you stepped out into the cool night air and out from prying eyes, Trent leaned down.

 “You alright, baby?” He whispered. You nodded, smiling up at him. “You wanted me to drive you home?” He looked at you smugly. 

“Mhhmm. To your house please. Just want to be with you,” you murmured, your words laced with affection. And with that, the rest of the party faded into the background, leaving just the two of you, ready to retreat to your own little world.

•

Thank you for reading! Please like, comment, or message what you think of the chapter or of what's to come!

Next part - Chapter 12 - Monaco xx

[fcbooblona]

Sexy Surprise - Rúben Dias

Where reader got her nipples pierced to surprise Ruben.

Author’s note: Hey guys! It’s been 6 years since I’ve last written something and I’m slowly getting back into this world🙂‍↕️ Also, english is my second language, so please be gentle 🫶

I’m totally on for requests and other stuff envolving football! Have a good reading🩷

tw: smut

It was a friday afternoon and you had nothing to do, Ruben left early for training and after doing all of the house chores, boredom took over the place. Feeling bored was one of the things you hated the most, because it allowed your thoughts to go through spirals of random things and it usually ended it up with you wanting to do something crazy.

Which is exactly what happened today.

After getting out of the couch, you decided to take a shower, wanting to feel more refreshed. In the meantime, between taking off your clothes and preparing everything, you stood before the large mirror in your closet, looking at your naked body. You’ve always felt comfortable with how your body is, but now…it seems like something’s missing.

With that thought in your head, you went to the bathroom to take a shower and think about what you could do to change your body just a little bit, when an idea snapped into your head. A couple of days ago, during lunch, your friend told you about how she got her nipples pierced and how it increased her self esteem, and, of course, how things got even more heated in the bedroom. That was exactly what you wanted, a boost to your self esteem that would also work as something to make the sex even better, since Rúben was already obsessed with your boobs, complimenting them every single time you had sex.

You finished the shower and went straight to your phone, searching for the perfect body piercer to do the job. Luckily, you found a good one and booked your appointment for the same day, at 4pm. Since you already have a couple of piercings, the pain was totally manageable and you were super happy about it, getting home really fast, excited to show Rúben the surprise.

It was already 7pm when your boyfriend arrived, finding you in the kitchen, making dinner in just a white tank top and a pair of his sweatpants. For him, this was the paradise. He went behind you to hug your waist with his strong arms, making you jump a little bit, since you haven’t heard anything, and started to kiss your neck.

- Hi, Ruben. I’ve missed you so much. - you said while he sucked on your sweet spot.

- Hi, amor. - he lifted his head to look at what you were cooking. - Is it my favorite pasta? - the smile on his face grew even more.

- Yes, baby, it is. But you have to take a shower first, I can still smell the grass. - you laughed while he pouted.

- You’re mean. - he said on the way to the bathroom.

You finished dinner and started to set the table ready, waiting for Rúben to finish his 1-million-hours-long shower. When he emerged into the kitchen, smelling heavenly, you were already sat on the table, where he joined you and the two of you started to eat dinner and talk about the day. You noticed that your boyfriend’s eyes were navigating between your face and your boobs, probably wondering if something changed, but you kept talking as if nothing happened and he didn’t comment or anything.

Later, you two were laying on the sofa, cuddling and watching some random stuff on tv, when you felt his hands on your waist and some featherlight kisses on your jaw, your turned your face and met his lips, kissing him with passion and soon straddling his lap, turning the innocent kisses into a heated make-out session. His hands were traveling your whole body and quickly found the hem of your shirt, lifting it up to find your perky nipples, adorned by cute metal pieces. When he finally saw it, his brain couldn’t think straight, amazed by the view, the only thing he were able to do were press kisses all over your boob, while saying how pretty you looked.

- I can’t believe you found a way to be even sexier - he said in disbelief, while you tried to hold your moans.

Things got even hotter and now you were practically begging for him to make you cum on his dick, so you reached his pants and grabbed it, stroking it slowly.

- I wanna ride you, Rubes. - you said with puppy eyes.

- I’m all yours, gatinha. - he answered you, knowing how you get even hornier when he speaks portuguese.

You freed his dick completely and took off your pants, aligning it with you entrance, the both of you moaning while you were adjusting to his size, and soon you started to rock your hips back and forth, causing him to groan.

- You look so good riding my dick, baby - he said, almost breathless.

After some time of riding, and being ridiculously horny, you started to feel the pressure building up on your lower stomach, indicating that you were close. You could feel that Rúben was also almost there, since his dick was throbbing non-stop while inside of you. He kept kissing your body, focused on your pierced nipples, obviously, and massaging your clit, while you couldn’t stop moaning.

- Fuck, Rúben, I’m gonna cum - you said, breathlessly

- Cum with me, amor - he said and started to thrust up, finding your body in the middle of the way.

After a couple of seconds, you finally came, releasing your liquids all over your boyfriend, who followed you and filled you up with his cum. The both of you stood there, panting, hugging each other and recovering from everything you’ve done.

- I love you so much, baby - Rúben said to you, while your head was buried in the crook of his neck. You smiled against his skin and lifted you head up.

- I love you too, Rubes. - you kissed his lips.

- And before I forget to say it, I. love. your. boobs. - he said, pressing a kiss on each one of your pierced nipples between the words.

I really hope you guys enjoy it and I will appreciate so much if you comment! 🩷

[ashwhowrites]

prompts:

“Since when did you ever care about me?!” “Since fucking forever, you idiotic dunce!” 

“You know I’m holding back from fucking you over this kitchen counter, don’t push your luck.”

but like with robin

I hope this is what you wanted and you enjoy it. Thank you for requesting 🫶🏻

Just sex, right?

Y/N and Robin had this friends-with-benefits thing going on. And neither ever asked about what it was or what it meant. The sex was great and it always was. But was it great because there were no feelings or because there were?

Robin struggled with casual sex. All her brain did was wonder what Y/N was thinking and what she felt. Robin is known to ramble on for days, and Y/N would wait until the last word before she kissed her. She listened to Robin, and they had conversations about life, but it ended in bed and that's where Robin couldn't tell what they were. And she was not going to ask, that's for damn sure.

Y/N liked Robin and she made that clear with the dates, the conversations, and the sex. They had been getting to know each other for months and Y/N could feel herself falling for Robin, and that scared but excited her. Y/N was obsessed with Robin. With her short hair, bright blue eyes, her voice - which is why she listened to everything Robin said, her lips, fingers, and everything. Y/N fell in love with every part of Robin. Robin was an addiction and Y/N constantly needed to taste Robin to fulfill the craving. Y/N never announced her feelings, at least not yet. But she felt that Robin felt the same and they were both on the same page.

At least that's what Y/N thought

But now she wasn't so sure as she watched Robin flirt with Vickie in the dim lights.

It was a house party, the music was loud and she couldn't tell a thing Robin was saying. But she knew it was flirting. Their bodies were getting closer and closer and Y/N kept feeling her stomach drop. She wasn't sure how long she'd allow herself to watch and suffer.

She watched as Robin leaned in, her left hand cradling Vickie's cheek the way she always did to Y/N's, and then their lips touched. Y/N felt her throat close up as she struggled to breathe. She felt betrayed and cheated.

But she would not pity herself

She blinked away at her tears, straightening her back and shoulders as she walked straight over to them. Not bothering to hide her anger as she grabbed Robin's arm, yanking her lips away from the redhead.

"ROBIN! WHAT THE HELL!" she screamed over the loud music

Robin looked at her with wide eyes. Vickie awkwardly looked between the two. Robin wasn't sure if she saw jealousy or pain in Y/N's eyes. But the thought of her being jealous made Robin shiver.

"WHAT DID I DO?" Robin asked, nerves in her voice as Y/N glared at her.

"UNBELIEVABLE!" Y/N scoffed, "FORGET THIS," she said, pointing between the two of them as she marched off.

Robin had no idea that kissing someone else would cause a storm, but she needed to follow her. She gave Vickie an apologetic smile and followed Y/N out the door.

"WAIT!"Robin yelled after her, but Y/N kept walking. Unlocking her car she ripped the door open.

"DON'T WANT TO TALK!" Y/N screamed back, she slammed her door and started her car. She turned her head as she heard the passenger door open and Robin's body slid in.

"What do you think you are doing?" Y/N asked, looking at Robin like she was crazy

"I upset you and we need to talk this out. I don't know what we are or where we plan to go. But I'm not leaving it like this. I don't deal well with awkwardness and I can't see you around school and feel my skin crawl as I think of what on earth to sa-" Robin rambled, but Y/N shook her head and sighed.

She locked the doors and began the drive to her house. Letting Robin continue to ramble the whole ride about the same things. Y/N could hear her voice getting higher and squeakier as she continued.

By the time Y/N pulled into the driveway, Robin was short of breath. They got out of the car and Robin followed as Y/N walked inside. The house was dark and quiet, meaning they were alone.

"And I'm sorry," Robin said as she finished her rant. Her blue eyes shined with anxiety. Following Y/N into the kitchen.

"Are you done?" Y/N asked, her arms crossed. Robin gulped at the amount of anger that surrounded her.

"Yes" Robin squeaked

"So what? Do you like her more or something?" Y/N asked, the question came out far more aggressive than she planned. And she wasn't sure if she could handle the answer.

"No!" Robin rushed out, moving closer to Y/N.

"Then why did you kiss her? Why did you kiss her when I was right there? Why didn't you kiss me?" Y/N snapped, her anger clear across her face as Robin tried to keep her breathing stable.

It was a weird feeling. Robin felt scared, but incredibly turned on. The glare Y/N had, with the snarl on her lip and her arms crossed, made Robin's underwear feel wet.

"I..I..um" Robin stuttered, Y/N walked closer. Her head turned as she stared Robin down like she was the prey.

"Well...I don't know"

"Oh?" Y/N laughed, "You don't know why you kissed another girl? Well, I want a Goodman answer so use that smart head of yours and give me one." Y/N demanded. Robin could feel her hot breath smacking her lips. This aggressive and mean side of Y/N truly was far more attractive than she thought.

"I wanted to" Robin blurted out, "I know her from the band and I..well.. sometimes I thought about kissing her so I did. But I didn't know it would make you mad! I swear!"

Y/N clicked her tongue and smirked. She trapped Robin against the kitchen counter and she slammed her hands on either side of Robin's body on the counter. Her palms were red against the cold marble as she pushed her heavy-breathing body against Robin's shaking one.

Robin kept her eyes locked on hers the whole time. She felt like she was in a trance and couldn't look away.

"And why do you think I wouldn't be mad?"

"Because it's just sex between us," Robin said, and that's what she truly thought it was. But she knew her answer was wrong when Y/N's face fell.

"Just sex, huh?" Y/N whispered, she bit her lip as she backed away. Moving herself as far away from Robin as she could. "Glad to know what I finally mean to you after all these fucking months together!" Y/N said, her voice starting to rise.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Robin scoffed, "I don't know what I mean to you! I didn't think you'd care about Vickie because we don't care about each other in that kind of way"

"Don't care?" Y/N said through clenched teeth

"Yes! I mean when did you ever care about me? When you fuck me in a bathroom party and leave with Chrissy?" Robin fought, the memory still in the back of her head. She remembered the pain she felt as she came out of the bathroom to see Y/N's arm wrapped around Chrissy as they left.

"Since fucking forever, you dingus! And I already told you that she got sick and needed a ride home so you can't throw that in my face. I've always cared about you. I put your favorite shirt in the dryer so you have a warm shirt to sleep in. I am there for every hangover you have. I've taken you on dates, to movies, to restaurants, to fairs, and fucking everything you've ever wanted to see. So don't tell me that I don't care when that's all I'VE EVER DONE!" Y/N threatened, her finger in Robin's face as she panted hard.

"I'm sorry, I didn't know...I guess I never...I'm sorry" Robin stuttered as she began to cry. The yelling, the fighting, and everything was getting too much.

"Look Robin," Y/N sighed as she collected herself. "Do you like me? Do you want to be with me?"

"Yes, I do" Robin gasped through her tears, erasing the space between them as she cupped Y/N's face. "I love you and I'm sorry I never said anything. And I'm sorry for tonight and the mess I made. I thought everything was just sex, but I'm wrong!"

"I love you too" Y/N whispered, she realized how close their faces were as she looked down at Robin's wet lips. "I should have said something instead of guessing we were on the same page"

Robin didn't have a chance to respond when Y/N hungrily smashed her lips against hers. Robin moaned as Y/N pushed her against the counter and her hands slipped up Robin's thighs. They messily made out, their tongues clashing as they touched any part of each other that they could.

They pulled away for air, panting as they stared into each other's eyes.

"Definitely a better kisser than Vickie" Robin tried to joke, a testing smile on her face.

She gasped when Y/N's hand wrapped around her throat, and her mouth went against Robin's ear. Her hot breath hit her skin, and Robin whimpered.

"I'm holding back from fucking you over this counter, don't press your luck"

...Robin made sure to press her luck

[6ix9inewiturmom]

Tummy Hurts- Christopher Sturniolo

Summary: when Chris falls in love with another woman while being in a rocky relationship with you, and dating you on and off

Warnings: cursing, crying, feelings on envy, yelling, use of Y/N, angst

A/n: TUMMY HURTS BY RENE RAPP>>>> also I got this idea while taking a beach nap lol

My relationship with Chris was always rocky but at the end of every day we always told each other that no matter what it would always be us, no one could turn our heads, and we always promised that after every fight.

When Chris and I first started dating I knew he’d be doing collabs with girls and be around girls on the occasion, which I typically wasn’t the jealous type but Chris is an amazing man and very attractive.

Chris had been hanging out with his friend Sam a lot, which didn’t bug me much if not at all, Sam was always respectful of my relationship with Chris and always made sure Chris would text me if they did anything sporadically, sometimes Chris would even spend the night there if I was working overtime.

Tonight I had originally told Chris I was working a little over but I wasn’t, I wanted to surprise him with a new set of lingerie I bought specifically for him, I know our 2 years isn’t till next week but our schedules don’t line up enough to see each other so I’m celebrating with him today.

I just pulled into Sam’s house to pick up Chris, and to say I was excited was an understatement, I was ECSTATIC. For obvious reasons I couldn’t just walk in Sam’s house with lingerie on so I was wearing some of Chris’ new fresh love set, I know it gets him excited every time I’m in his clothes or his brand, no matter how many times I’ve worn them.

I knocked on the front door eagerly waiting for someone to answer the door, and to my surprise it was Sam. “Oh hey Y/N” his eyes widened when he saw me at the front door, he was stuck like a deer in headlights.

“Hey Sam, is Chris here?” I had a small smile on my face hoping the reason for his sudden facial expression was because he wasn’t expecting me.

He scratched the back of his head nervously “he uh- he just- he actually left here to go to his house like uh- 30 minutes ago?” He stuttered.

“Oh, I’m sorry for bothering you then.. he just said he’d be here all night…” my voice trailed off.

“See you around Y/N” he quickly replied shutting the door.

Weird. Very weird. Chris never leaves Sam’s house without telling me. As soon as I got in my car, I opened Life360 to find Chris’ location was off, he never turns his location off, EVER, even when we were in arguments or on our ‘breaks’ we never turned that off.

I decided to do what anyone else would do and text him. ‘Christopher’ my message read. He immediately read my message. His bubble would pop up and then go away, that went on for a good few minutes.

‘Yea?’ He replied. No joke about how I used his ‘government name’ as he calls it? Funny, but not funny haha funny WEIRD.

‘Is there any specific reason why your location is off? Or is Life360 just messing up again? I know it does it from time to time’ i wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt and maybe his phone was acting up.

Once again his bubble would pop up and down. ‘Idk ma, I’m at Sam’s house so could jus be the app IG’ there’s no benefit of the doubt anymore. He’s straight up lying.

‘Funny cause I got off early and wanted to surprise you by picking you up and celebrating our 2 years early and he said you weren’t there that you left to go back to the house… soooooooooo’ why would he be lying? This is not like Chris.

This time I was left on read. No bubble just read. I wasn’t just fucking pissed i was ENRAGED. Call me a crazy girlfriend but after all we’ve been through you’d do the same thing.

My drive home from Sam’s was filled with road rage of idiots who can’t drive, screaming song lyrics, etc. as soon as I reached home my blood was boiling. I spammed Chris with impulsive messages.

‘Where the fuck are you?’

‘Christopher Owen sturniolo pick ur lying ass phone up’

‘Ur the biggest lying fuckass person I know’

‘You know nevermind keep ur ass wherever your at, i don’t wanna see your ass again’

After 45 minutes to an hour of pacing my shared apartment with Chris my phone finally rang, I picked it up to see it was Chris.

“Where the fuck are you Christopher?” My voice was cold and filled with rage.

“Ma, lis-“ I immediately cut him off “no you’re not gonna ‘ma’ me Christopher.”

“Y/N… listen I-I can explain” he stuttered “I lied.”

“Aren’t you Albert fucking Einstein?” I snapped.

“Y/N will you fucking listen to me, god damn all you do is yap and bitch and groan” he lets out a sigh and I quickly made an ultimatum of let him finish or bitch him out.

“Go on” I forced myself to calm down for a split second because after acting the way I did I knew I needed to at least hear him out.

“So a while ago while you were on that girls trip, I was at Sam’s for his release party right before summer smash in Chicago, I uh I ended up running into this girl from high school, we talked the whole night and we ended up hooking up and she’s- she’s pregnant… Y/N, I love you I really do I always will but, I’m not IN love with you.. uh anymore.. I realized our love wasn’t healthy, it was toxic and I’m sure you can agree” he took a deep breath out like a weight was dropped from his shoulders. My jaw was on the floor. I was astonished by the words coming from his mouth.

“I just need a minute Chris…” my voice broke when I spoke and he and I both knew I was hurt. He made a little ‘tsk’ with his mouth and I hung up. My body hit the floor besides the couch I was uncontrollably ugly crying. My hands were shaky but I picked up the phone to call the one person I knew I could trust, my best friend, Riley.

“Hey bitch what’s up?” She answered.

My voice broke with her, I couldn’t bear to break her happy mood with my awful news. “Chris is in love with a girl from high school it’s been- it happened when- when we went to Hawaii together wi-with Whitney, Mayci, and uh um Taylor, and she’s- she’s fucking pregnant” I immediately started sobbing.

“Okay what the fuck? Maybe you should try religion cause Jesus he’s hard to rely on” in the mist of me sobbing my eyes out I managed to let out a soft giggle.

“Now my tummy hurts, he’s in love with her, but-but um- for- for what’s it’s worth they’d make beautiful babies” my sobs became harder and harder.

“Okay just breathe, I know this is a lot. Have you ever heard of the players curse?” She sounded awfully calm for someone who just heard her boyfriend of 2 years cheated on her and got another girl pregnant.

“N-no?” She laughed. And immediately got excited.

“The players curse is when a man did terrible things to a woman/women and run through them treating them worthlessly. In turn these men normally have daughters, their punishment is that their daughters will experience everything that they did to women.” For some reason this little peace of advice and knowledge helped me a tad.

“So eventually 2043, someone’s gonna hurt their little girl like their dad hurt me? And raise em’ up to a couple of fucking monsters like their mother and they father.” I couldn’t help but cry thinking of someone living my dream I wanted to live with Chris. I wanted to carry his children, I wanted to marry him, all of his dreams involved ME, not her.

“EXACTLY! Keep that mindset girl and you’ll be perfect” she cheered as if I just said I won the lottery.

“When will he pay for what he did to me. I’m fucking broken Ri, I don’t know what the fuck to do” I kept sobbing and sobbing. Chris was the love of my life.

“Never cause that’s just boys being boys girl” she breathed out. “Why don’t we go out tonight and party and get hammered”

“I don’t think that’s the best idea Ri, I don’t think I can handle drinking and stuff” I bit my lip nervously thinking about everything that could go wrong while drinking.

“You know, your probably right” she gasps “oh my god do you remember when me and you got super drunk that first time you and Chris were on a break? You ended up drunk calling him and he had Matt come and pick you up?” Her laughter always lit up my day. No matter how sad I was I was always smile every-time I heard her voice. “So what are you gonna tell Chris?”

“Chris and are done, he’s not in love with me anymore. I’ll always be loved by him but I will not be someone he’s in love with unless things change and even if it does change, I don’t think we’ll ever be in a relationship again” I felt oddly and strangely content with that thought of never having to fight with Chris or wonder if I’m saying the wrong things, speaking wrongly, or vise versa.

“Does he know yall are done? Or is it YOUR done?” She spoke softer hearing my content voice of my current situation with Chris.

“Text him” was the two words she spoke. “He broke up with you over phone, you confirm the breakup over text, and you text me if you need anything girl, I love you, and you know this,”

“Love you too girl,” I sighed and opened my messages I knew I had to do it but couldn’t push myself to do it.

“Chris, though I’ve enjoyed the two years with you, and I can agree it was toxic and should’ve been done a long time ago, however you’re not in love with me I am with you and I will always be. I’ll always be here for you as a friend because essentially that’s what we were before dating. I love you Christopher.”

Sending that message broke me into a million pieces. Now my tummy hurts, he's in love with her But for what it's worth, he's her problem now And she'll stay with him 'Cause she made with him a couple monsters Like their mother and their father, eventually, 2043 Someone's gonna hurt your little girl like he hurt me.

HELLOOOO EVERYONEEEEEEEE!!!!

So sorry for lack of inactivity but I would like to say this is one of my favorite fics I’ve ever written and if you haven’t heard the song please listen now!! I love you all and thank you for the patience!

XOXO

Gabs!

[pedrithink]

pedri and reader arguing over him forgetting their anniversary?

forgetfulness ✩ pedri gonzález

summary: pedri forgot your birthday.

To wake up and watch your boyfriend go into another room and get ready without looking you in the eye hurts. You really don't understand how Pedri can forget this day, your day. You understand that he has a lot to remember, but it hurts that he doesn't remember a day that is so important to you.

"Good morning." You say when you see him in the kitchen, hoping that he would turn around and remember your day.

He walks up to you and leaves a kiss on your head. "Good morning, sleepy head. How are you?" You can only swallow dryly and try to hide your disappointment as much as possible.

"Fine. And you?" You briefly watched as your boyfriend approached the door to leave and go straight to training.

"I'm fine. I'll see you later, okay?" He leaves a kiss on your mouth and a light caress in your hair before leaving completely out of the house.

You take a deep breath and can't control yourself, tears streaming down your face. How could he do this to you? He didn't have to write you a text or send you a bunch of gifts, you just wanted him to at least make a point of remembering your birthday. Maybe at least a "Happy Birthday" would be better than silence.

Ignoring the tightness in your chest, you sit down on the couch to read all the affectionate messages your family and friends have left. Trying not to remember that the person who simply lives with you has completely forgotten.

"Hey, how's she doing?" Pedri turns to face Gavi, he doesn't fail to arch an eyebrow.

"What do you mean, she who?"

"Y/N? What do you mean she who?"

Gavi looks at Pedri with a "Are you crazy?" expression and Pedri is even more confused that he is so randomly asking about you. "She's fine, same as always. Why are you asking me that out of the blue?"

Pedri lets out a weak laugh and Gavi can't help but frown. "I just thought she'd be mad that you had to come to practice on her birthday. Didn't you get a break? I swear Xavi was cool with it, but…"

Pedri interrupts Gavi on the spot and picks up his cell phone to check today's date, Holy shit….

"Holy shit, Gavi. What have I done?" he sits up and runs his hand through his hair nervously. Pedri can't hold back a nervous sigh and he remembers the way you looked different this morning, the way your eyes looked disappointed with every word he said.

"Don't tell me you forgot…" Gavi runs his hand across his forehead and doesn't fail to slap Pedri on the head. "Fuck you, you stupid. Go home and fix it, you dumb fuck."

After Gavi said this, Pedri couldn't contain himself and just picked up his cell phone and car keys. The despair and anxiety hit him when he saw that at was going to be a 40 minute ride judging by the awful traffic he was caught in while coming from the training center.

He only hoped that you could forgive him for that.

You hear the door slam in a rush and your expression already changes. Gavi texted you and it hurts even more to know that he only remembered because someone told him to. You turn toward the door as Pedri opens it and only cross your arms when you see his figure with an upset expression on his face.

"Baby, I…forgive me." He tries to move closer to you, but you push him away.

"Now you remember? Nice to know how important I am to you." You let out a wry smile and shake your head as if you couldn't believe Pedri's attitude.

He shrugs his shoulders and turns serious. "Please try to understand me. I have a lot on my mind."

"I also have several things to do and solve, Pedro. But, I have never forgotten a birthday of yours."

Pedri sits on the edge of the bed, fixing an invisible point with a stare that sends chills to your bones. "You're picking this argument for nothing. Because I forgot for a few hours you're going to undo everything I've done for you all year? The world won't stop because it's your birthday." When he says this, it's as if a knife had been plunged into his heart. Doesn't he understand that it isn't only about today? He has been getting more and more distant and it seems that everything about you is not so important to be remembered by him. "People go on working as usual, their problems don't end, their available times are the same. So it is natural that someone ends up forgetting your birthday. So if I have not remembered your day for a few hours, it does not necessarily mean that I have no consideration for you, that I am not a good boyfriend or anything like that."

You paused in the middle of the room, with teary eyes. "The thing is not just today, Pedro. You don't make a point of having me around anymore, and it seems like every day more and more you make it clear that things about me don't matter to you." Your eyes watering and the way your hand rests on your chest to try to push away this pain that only increases, he can only feel bad for making you feel this way. He wants to touch you and pull you into his embrace. "Whoever loves you automatically provides you with things that don't need to be begged. And I think that if you didn't mind my absence, maybe it's because my presence was never important to you and that scares me."

"I love you, I'm sorry if it made it seem like I don't care about your presence." He says while looking deep into your eyes, he says all this with his eyes shining and murmuring, as if it were your little secret.

He opened and closed his eyes, trying to keep the tears from falling from his eyes. He hates arguing with you and this feeling that you're about to run between his fingers, this shit hurts. He snuggles deeper into the bed and crosses his arms. You sighed, running a hand on your face.

The silence stretched on and on, you were afraid to say something and end up hurting both of you. "I…I think I'll sleep in the other room tonight." You say as you stare at the wall in front of you, and when you saw that he was going to say something, you interrupted him. "Just for today, just for today…I think we both need this space. To think."

He shakes his head in agreement, but more than anything, he just wanted to pull you into his arms and ask you to forgive him for all the times he made you feel this way. "Sleep here, I'll go to another room." He murmurs, already getting up, not even giving you time to say.

The night came and neither of you could sleep, you had never had a fight like this before, much less slept apart after one. You started a war without realizing it, without communicating, and that is the biggest mistake of all. You just wanted this night to pass and Pedri was controlling himself not to get up and hug you until that pain in his chest was gone, nothing hurts more than knowing that he hurts you.

As morning came, you could only sleep for a few hours and Pedri couldn't rest at all. He just wanted the morning to come soon so that you could talk and get this out of his chest, he couldn't accept losing you.

When you got up, Pedri was already in the kitchen preparing something for you to eat. You let a smile escape when you saw the way he was committed to cooking for you. "Good morning."

He turned to you and tried to relax his posture when he saw that you were more relaxed after yesterday's discussion. God, he has never seen you as beautiful as you are now. "Good morning, my love. Hey." He runs his hands through his sweatpants and approaches you a little fearfully, you lower your guards and let him hug you.

He squeezes you even tighter in his arms and leaves several kisses on your head, you can only sink further into his arms and nuzzle the tip of your nose against his neck. "Without your hug that comforts, without your kisses that fill me with so much love, without your company. I can no longer imagine a future where you are not, because you are always there!"

He says all this while his hands are running down your back in a caress. You listen to everything intently and try to take a deep breath as a weight comes off your shoulders. "I know I've been a jerk, I'm sorry about that. But under no circumstances should you think that I don't care enough about you." He pulls you away from his embrace so that you could look into each other's eyes while this conversation takes place. "Love is not confusion, love is staying together, even confused. It's working it out together. It's not walking away. I've reflected on all my actions this morning and I'm just sorry, I'm sorry for all the times I made you feel like it wasn't reciprocated."

You caress his face and let a smile escape. "It's okay."

"It's not okay, but now it will be. Love is about giving, believing, and sharing. Love is all of that and I want to be with you. I want to share my needs and your needs because making you happy is my goal." He leaves three kisses on your mouth and rests his forehead against yours. "Now let's go back to yesterday and make you have an extremely special day, today is all about you and me."

You can't hide your excitement and hug Pedri again. He has never broken a promise and you faithfully believe that he will review the actions that have hurt you. He is the person you trust most in the whole world.

[haechurch]

thirst.

that's how you feel about this guy. he's making you... thirsty.

inspired from thirsty by aespa. (you guys might dont think thirsty by aespa as what i am thinking... its actually a tHIRST SONG. a song that is about *THIRST*)

w. blowjob, pussy eating, slapping, pet names, cum slut rdr!!! breeding kink, hint of catching feelings maybe, idk but it might sound so horny and dirty, unprotected sex, just minors dni

he's making you thirsty. so when he gave in for the first time (or is it you? you do not recall) he keeps making you come back for more, it haunts you like crazy and eventually you can't endure the torture anymore, like a vampire who's been fed by blood, you hunt for another unless you die.

I'm knocking on you again

The sight gently swaying on the sparkling water surface every day

you are roommates. the idea of getting a life under the same roof with some random boy concerns you for the first time, but now you definitely thank heavens. because damn, he's fine af. every morning he would cook his own eggs, brew his own coffee.. with low training pants hanging dearly around his hips, messy black hair, glasses, and every time he wore that plain white t-shirt. how can be a shirt making someone look like that. hot. he's fucking hot.

his body proportion is a perfection you would say, never you saw someone built like that before, and you convince that god indeed has a favorite. a man who got to be looking so fine in just a white plain fucking t-shirt.

it hugged his torso perfectly. when he's doing his thing in the kitchen, his back deliciously on display while you sit on the dining table which is placed in front of the kitchen counter and it's not exaggerated to be said that it is a perfect spot to appreciate the view, just as you meant to be.

you can't help but stare and stare, unconsciously nipping, licking, and pressing your lips together, sighing then coughing when you found yourself not quiet enough to cover your act of drooling, and one thing you can't help so badly is pressing your thighs together under the table, aggressively.

he wouldn't know.

until one night he heard you getting off when you believe he left the house and you thought you heard him that he's gonna come back late. but he didn't.

the thing is, you do believe he's not home when you finished your business and get out of your room, lights even from the kitchen were off, but then you suddenly hear a deep voice coming from his unlocked space.

"having fun?"

"fuck! what the hell?!?" you jumped as you clutched on your chest, utterly shocked. he sits on the edge of his bed which can be seen as the doors open. the shit eating grin on his face got your heartbeat running even faster.

"the fuck were you doing? how long have you been there??" you trying to be sounds normal and honestly you thought you did a great job. except for the fact the he's been there. all the time.

"who would've thought the girl that has been acting all shy and quiet..."

he pause and gesturing some random swirls with his fingers in the air before he continue, "..is actually a beast."

you rolled your eyes, "what do you mean?"

"you know what i mean, don't acting all innocent now i heard you."

"so? i'm just having my time it's none of your business seriously. you're exaggerating things."

"oh? so you're touching yourself with the thought of me was exaggerating? do you even realize how loud you were? i almost barging into your room to help you out when you call my name but i decided to give you respect.." your face flushed, he's eyeing you from head to toe as he wet his lips, ".. for your personal space,"

"haha so thoughtful" you cleared your throat then rolled another eye, arms folded sternly.

"you're so irresistible... always thought that you never want me.." he get up from his bed and walking straight to where you stand and you thoughtlessly unfold your arms guardless when he stand this close to your body.

"such a pretty girl.. wearing this thin tank top with nothing underneath but shorts? tsk."

he grab at your hand and bring your fingers in front of his face, nosing at your fingers, the right fingers you use for getting yourself off, and inhales sharply before he took it to his mouth to suck.

"what the fuck...?" you gasp at his act, face contorted in disgust, but to be honest, made you turn on at the same time.

"i should've known this sooner... never thought that you're gonna be so... slutty."

even though he wasn't the type that aggressively makes move. you were so stupid to think that he's just as shy as you, and dull, but as today happens you have to acknowledge that he's just good at holding back. and that with much respect, as he was saying. even so, the way he behave tonight.. you couldn't be more aroused. can't believe you two keep your hands off each other just to know that both of you are actually desperate to fuck each other.

The more I touch you, the more thirsty

I'm sure it's full, but I'm thirsty (Yeah I gotcha' boy)

his hands are currently all over your body. inviting him to your room is a big big mistake. from considering to be a sweet hearted kind of guy and help you folding your laundry, you have your legs being folded instead as he eat you out messily. so messy that the sound of slurping and your juices make you cringe. but damn it feels so good, he do it so right it leaves you blabbering nonsense you didn't know you let out. you squeeze your thighs together and pull on his hair, hip lifted so high onto his face to press your own pleasure cause it feels too much, but too good.

it's been a while since he caught you on the other day, and it's always him giving you head and not vice versa. he sensed that you don't want to do the same thing and didn't ask about it either, in fact, he's pretty content that he can have his way with you and eat you out gladly whenever he desires. but it's just the fact that you're actually holding back.

you want him. you want to suck on those dick that god knows he's beyond hard after when he had his way with you, but the thought of getting addicted to him already makes you unsettled. what if you become like, dependent? or what if you keep looking for him because you always wanted a taste? what if you liked him? it's the same as playing with drugs, it's so tempting that the moment you got a taste, you'll be addicted. need more, and more, more of him.

it's morning again. him with his pieces of clothing and standing behind the counter where he can see you clearly. you're sitting on the sofa in the living room which faces directly at the kitchen. he may look busy doing his thing, but he won't miss the way you look at him like a starving woman. you're staring so hard. staring at his crotch, in fact. you're so lost that you miss the way his eyes watching you, smirking in amusement like he knows exactly what you were thinking.

"angel."

you twitched at his remark, nearly dropping your bowl at the moment.

"i know you want me." he's straight to the point. it makes you bewildered that you let your mouth open and close with no words to let out.

now it feels so much harder to resist him. you can't hold on any longer.

"c'mere." you know he's controlling you. and you know you wouldn't disobey him for once. so you get up with a huff pretending that you don't like any of the ideas in his head right now and making a beeline to stand in front of him.

"what do you want?" you shifted on one leg and tried to act calm, and you do. but he won't fall for that. he already feels you. feels your need.

"what do you want?" he asked you the same question, his tone stern but his voice delicate.

"i-i don't-"

he cut you off by catching your lips on his, and as he did that, you close your eyes, already submitted. you moan to the kiss as he started to grope your ass, using his tongue to lap all over your mouth in a heated make out session. after feels like hours you broke the kiss, and he stare at your fucked out face before he harshly pushed you on your knees and started to pull down his joggers, his hard on on full display.

he stroke his length slowly as he let out a low groan while staring down at you, you couldn't be more wet. your mouth agape, the need for tasting him is so strong you're losing your mind. on all four, you crawl closer to him and hesitantly replace his own hand on his cock with yours. it's so hard that the image of him being aroused because of you makes you tingle. your grip is strong on his cock, and you squeeze it deliciously, making him growl.

you kiss the tip, basically teasing both of yourselves, before finally sucking on his blunt like a lollipop. you keep doing the suction, then give a handful of his balls a massage while you let go of the tip and start pressing kisses along his shaft. he reacts so well it makes you excited, pussy already drenched with arousal. you take half of his shaft onto your mouth, proceeding to bob your head up and down, cheeks hollowed and tongue gliding under his shaft, you do this for a while before taking all of him in the back of your throat, which makes you gag a little. he hissed and his head thrown back, both of his hands grabbed at the back of your head sternly, pinning you down his length you hardly move.

"fuck. i knew you'd be good at this. good for nothing but chokes on a cock, huh? you feel so fucking good, so fucking spoiled, aren't you? why don't you tell me you're my cock slut, hm?"

of course you can't tell a fucking thing. mouth is full of dick, good for nothing but being stuffed by his cock. and you love it so much it gave you shivers. you hummed bringing vibration down his cock which makes him let another groans, then he started to fuck himself on your throat. he let go of his hands from the back of your head and pulling his length out before thrusting, he quickly find his pace and face fuck you in a steady pace, bringing your hair in a ponytail as a nice grip.

you already know that since then, the things between you two would just bring another sweet disaster.

Sip, sip, sip, it all night

Dip, dip, dip, it all night

before sleeping, on the midnights when both of you are still awake, in the morning, when you are sick from the assignments, while cooking lunch in the kitchen, when he says he's horny, even after working out, you'll gladly give him head. every time, anywhere.

you're addicted. it's started concerning you if it's fucking normal to do a blowjob like it's some kind of routine.

you love his load. you'll gladly devour every drop of his spurt without him asking you to. even if your mouth is full of his cum, it's still not enough. when you swallow it down your throat, you still feel thirsty.

So thirsty thirsty thirsty

Drench me with your heart hidden deep in the water

you fuck for the first time that night. watching movies with a guy best friend who's been doing things with you is most likely leading to something more, which is kinda terrifies you. but fuck it, you both know that you're already far from crossing the line.

"you're so pretty." he whispered in your ear, his hands all over your torso, groping and kneading your tits. you squirm from his touch and throw your head on his shoulder, body resting comfortably on his lap. your bare back feels warm against his chest, you can feel his clothed dick keeps poking you from behind. he kisses your jaw, neck, shoulder, collarbone, then down to your spine it makes you shiver. he grab your hips to lift you up and bend you over on all four, before eating you out from behind. your back arched like a cat, face buried into the sofa pillow, muffled your own moan, hands squeezed into each other so tight.

"oh, fuck. so so good, please don't stop-" you managed to mumble, his grip on your thighs so strong, one hand kneading your cheek and slap it hard. you moan at the feelings, panting like crazy, drool all over the pillow under you as he eating you out expertly, licking from the bottom all the way to the top to suck on your clit, fat tongue sliding against your folds like he's devouring an ice cream, he spits, giving open mouthed kisses all over your pussy, fucking your hole as deep as possible with his wet muscle with purpose.

"fuck i'm so close. can you please hurry u-"

he slapped your cunt making you gasp and jolt. "what is it angel?"

"make me cum,"

"only good girls can cum. are you a good girl? my good girl?"

you dropped your head on the pillow, feeling frustrated cause this time, you desperately wanted to be fucked, hard.

"yes, i am your good girl. please, just please, fuck me,"

that's it. it's smoothly rolled off your lips. he's giving a pause for a moment at your comment, before you hear a rustle behind you, you're looking over your shoulder and he's already taking off his bottoms, leaving him as naked as you are.

"pretty girl, you're gonna be the death of me," he's stroking his dick in slow motion, the head is hitting your entrance making you arch your back even more, begging in silence to be fucked.

"shit, you're so fucking wet." he's lining his cock on your opening, teasing his own length between your very drenched folds, and it makes you whine.

he slapped your cheeks again, "beg," he said. "beg for it."

you feels like crying when you beg him, "fuck me. please,"

Yeah I keep getting greedy

Telling me that you probably too

both of you never spent nights together until morning in one room. being fucked stupid by your roommate was never been on your wishlist, but it's not that bad.

"fuck me. please,"

your tone was so desperate it mortifies you, but you don't even care anymore, you want him, so fucking much. he might want you as much as you want him, and you do want to believe that.

he's slowly bottoming up when both of you groan in unison. he's so big, you feel full, and you love the feeling. hands on your hips, almost clawing when he piston his cock in and out of you. you're a moaning mess, he then pull at your hair to yank your head up, back touching his torso while he fucks you precisely from behind.

"you're so sweet and tight. i love it." he nibbles and grunts in your ear, his voice is so sexy you're beyond turned on.

"want to... want to see your face..." you said in a tiny voice and he move quickly to grant your wish. he pulls out and carry you to move into his bed, then plop you onto the sheets.

you suddenly feel embarrassed, hands buckle up covering your chest. he chuckled when he find you were so vulnerable. like a lost little pup. fucking cute.

"acting shy just now?" he's hovering over you, parting your legs apart and sliding into your waiting hole once more. you gasp and arch your neck, he swiftly kiss and sucks on your exposed skin to leave red marks. you sigh in bliss, his mouth on you feels so right, him making you full and complete, you couldn't be more in joy.

he kiss you one more time on the mouth and thrust at a quick pace above you, eyes staring at you with lust and admiration. he's so pretty with his hair sticking all over his forehead, sweat covering his muscular body, glistening under the lights. he's so sexy.

"come with me, yeah? i want you to come with me." he demands. you nod your head and shut your eyes tightly, moaning into oblivion when he start to play with your clit and you explode right away. he's moaning with you when you squeeze him so firmly, his pace erratically fast as he easily glides in and out, drenched pussy and skin to skin clapping can be heard all over the room.

"just come in me." you cup his face and look him in the eyes, almost lovingly, and you whispered to him that made him cum immediately,

"i want you to fill me up, so full it's overflowing. plant babies in me."

only hard breathing and groan are heard inside of this room. it's not long after you two continue in bed, but the room is already steamy and smells like sex.

"not enough," you speak, more like mumbling to yourself.

"what?" he remarked.

"i said," you smile wholeheartedly at him, and come closer to his ear.

"i want all of your cum in me until my pussy has already taken all the remaining space for it."

Yes, I'm thirsty when I see you

[yamst3rdamctrl]

🎄Merry Smutty Christmas🎄

Requested by: @bhjszsdxc

Summary: YN, her best friend Ashley, and Michael spend Christmas Eve together so they can celebrate it as friends. YN has feelings for Michael, but he has no clue. Ashley is the only one who knows YN secret; however, Ashley acts like she likes Michael even though she has a boyfriend. Little does either know Michael is madly head over hills for YN.

 

As the holidays approached, YN, Ashley, and Michael prepped for their Christmas Friend Day, which they planned to eat and bake cookies, drink hot chocolate, and watch movies. Michael and YN started gathering everything that was needed while they waited for Ashley to come. “I hope she don’t bring her crazy ass boyfriend. He be sickening asf.” Michael said, and YN agreed. Michael and YN then reached for the same cookie batter, and YN blushed while Michael looked in her eyes. Michael looked up at the ceiling, pointed, and said, “Mistletoe”. Michael leaned into YN and before he could kiss YN a door opened and in came the loud Ashley screaming, “What’s up bitches! Did I interrupt something?” YN blushed and said, “Oh no girl” and continued to get everything ready.

As YN, Ashley, and Michael sat watching TV, and a love scene came on Michael watched YN shift in her seat. He knew she had not properly been fucked in awhile since her last boyfriend. Michael knew she was feening and he knew that, and he wanted to be the one to break her in. Ashley noticed that Michael was looking at YN in a sexual way, so she decided to expose everybody. Ashley cut the TV off and said, “Since we are friends, I have a confession, Michael, I like you so what’s up?” YN looked shocked and lost for words and felt bad. “Well...” Michael started and then said, “I like YN, and I want her. Ashley, you got a whole man. Girl bye.” YN thought to herself and said oh my God… he likes me. Ashley was upset and decided to put a spin on it, “Well, I want to fuck so let’s go.” Ashley tried to walk up because she wanted Michael. Michael got up and YN felt horrible because she never thought he would try her best friend. Michael then moved straight to YN and tongue kissed her. Ashley acted shocked and then walked away and left the house. Little did Michael and YN know this what apart of Ashley’s plan. She knew that Michael and YN liked each other and the only way that it would work if she played a villain.

Michael took his lips of YN and said, “YN, I really like you and I love being your friend, but I want to be more, and I need to fuck you.” YN looked in shock but then Michael moved further towards YN and kissed her lips before slipping his tongue in her mouth. Michael then grabbed YN by the waist and picked her up while she wrapped her legs around him. Michael was ready to have fun with YN since he knew she could take his 10 inches. Michael then dropped YN on the bed and climbed on top of her and started to kiss all over her. Michael laid on the side of YN and kissed her all on her neck and put his hand in her pants and began to rub on her pearl. YN started to moan and grind on his hand and Michael grew inpatient and ripped her pants of and immediately attached his mouth to YN pussy. He began to suck, lick, and tongue fuck her pussy as much as he could. He had no problem with taking his finger and playing with her pussy with no problem. YN was a moan mess under Michael while he ate her pussy like it was the last meal. Michael was wanting YN for the longest and he finally got her.

YN started to grind on his mouth, and she started shaking. “Nutt all in my mouth baby.” Soon as Michael finished his sentence YN came undone right in his mouth. Michael did his best to drink her water to quench his thirst. “Okay Michael, I’m done cumming move.” YN said to Michael but didn’t care he kept sucking and eating her pussy. Michael then locked YN down by her legs and had her losing it. “Oh my god, Michael I’m cumming again.” Michael allowed YN to cum from another nutt. She did not expect that she would cum that much from head alone. Michael got up and wiped his mouth and looked like a demon had awoken in his eyes. Michael grabbed YN by her ankles and pulled her to the edge of the bed. Michael stripped naked and began to stroke his dick coming closer to YN. That is when Michael plunged his dick inside of Yns tight, wet pussy. YN then yelled out in pleasure from feeling him inside of her. Michael moaned as soon as he felt her insides, and he was determined to make her feel it in her guts.

Michael then started to fuck YN harder and harder in missionary. YN could just sit there and take it, and she loved every second of it. YN then felt the knot forming in her stomach and that is when Michael said, “Give me that shit baby.” YN came without a second thought and gave him all her juices. Michael then flipped YN over on her stomach and entered her from the back. He started off so but then gradually started to go faster. Michael then kept going and had YN a moaning mess. He saw how wet YN was and decided to take it up and a bit and took his dick out of her pussy and put it in her asshole. He squeezed his dick inside of her tight asshole and made her moan hard as hell. Michael then started to fuck her ass slow to loosen her up, once he felt she was loosening up he started to fuck her harder. YN started to run from how hard he was fucking her. Michael popped her right ass cheek and said, “Take that dick” in his husky voice. The dick was so powerful she ran so fast his dick came out. YN knew she couldn’t take that much in her ass and had to get him out. Michael then put his dick back in her pussy and fucked her into submission. YN was a moaning mess when he reached around to grab her neck with both hands while getting a good angle and rhythm. Her eyes started to roll in the back of her head and that knot started to form one again. That is when Michael said, “I’m about to cum all inside your pussy.” Before she knew it, she came, and not too long after Michael thrusted so hard and nutted in her pussy while moaning and then he pulled out and collapsed next to YN. He looked at the clock and saw that it was past midnight. “Merry Christmas Baby” Michael said and he and YN cuddled and fell asleep.

[storiesbyjes2g]

3.202 More of you

Alessia walked away with Desiree, so I went back into the house to decide how to spend my free day. At first, I thought I'd sit down and strategize about how to move forward with my life. I still hadn't tried the candle thing. I could go ahead and open a yoga studio and see how I feel about it. Before my mind ran away with more ideas, I stopped. My go to move is always to keep busy and stay two steps ahead. Meanwhile, my wife is somewhere by herself, probably thinking about me. It's crazy because I love her like no one else, yet I still have trouble prioritizing our relationship. She's my north star, always there, pointing me in the right direction. I'm learning, however, that is both a blessing and a curse. It's great knowing she'll always be there, but I take that for granted a lot, especially when I have so much on my mind. So, I found her and announced Desi would be spending the day with Less and the kiddos and asked if she'd like to jog around the lake with me. Her face lit up at the proposal, yet she hesitated.

"I'd love to, but I'm so out of shape! That trail is like really long."

"Yeah... But you'll be fine. We'll pace ourselves and take breaks."

My recent knee pain and stamina issues came to mind. It's too early in the day to feel so run down.

"Actually, scratch the jog," I said. "We can power walk."

"That's more my speed!"

We changed clothes and strolled to the trailhead by the bridge near the splash park. I was so giddy about doing this with her. It was seriously one of my best ideas. Sharing my favorite activities with my wife is something I don't often get to do, and I couldn't stop smiling at her.

"What's got you all giddy over there?" she asked.

"Just you."

"Aww! Hey...I've been thinking. We should take another family vacation before school starts."

"Oooh, yes. I'm always down for a vacation. Where do you want to go this time?"

"I was thinking...Mt. Komorebi."

"That is the best idea," I shouted.

I honestly never considered returning to the place where we met, but hearing the proposal set my body ablaze with excitement. I couldn't wait to share our history with our family and began looking for rentals immediately.

"This is gonna be so much fun! Desi and the niblings are going to love the snow!"

"Actually, I was thinking it could just be us," she said.

"Oh. Okay. I mean, that's cool, but...any reason why?"

"You know I don't mind your family, but I want Des to have some memories with just us."

What she said made sense. I'm always trying to make sure my niece and nephews have experiences because I know Less won't take them anywhere. To this day, she still never goes anywhere without me. But Sophia is right. The lines between raising my child and looking after the trio are so blurry I can't keep them straight.

"If we leave tomorrow, we could spend Winterfest there," I said. "What do you think about that?"

"I think it sounds magical."

After our walk, I FINALLY took Sophia to that restaurant I'd been dying to take her to ever since we started dating. The date was very reminiscent of our first date, filled with laughter and shenanigans. We may be sprouting gray hairs left and right, and we may be busier than we've ever been, but we're still that same young, silly couple from Oasis Springs. She's still simple, elegant, and fine as hell, and I still feel like the luckiest man alive.

We got home around dinnertime and knew our day date was coming to a fast close, so we went upstairs, got comfortable, and aimed to have a little adult fun before the kid returned. She put on that little skin-colored, see-through number I like and slid under the covers next to me. The bedroom is where she shows me just how assertive she can be, but she didn't make a move. Neither did I. We gazed into each other's eyes for several moments before she nestled her head against my shoulder.

"I love you," she whispered. "I'm so happy to be married to you."

I returned the sentiment, realizing how long it had been since the last time those words left my mouth. I add a few more things I had never admitted to her before, like how much I appreciate her patience with me; how lost I'd be without her; how lucky I felt she chose me. That moment ranked very high on our list of intimate moments, and I wanted it to last forever. I'm always down to shake the sheets with Sophia, but quite honestly, I could do with more of this.

[pedge-stuff]

HC: like if u are dating Pedro he is protective af in public. like the man is so sweet and wholesome but i like to think that if you ever get “harassed” in public or someone tried to record you,bother you, say he can do better than you to you or him he will like get sooo mad. He would barely be able to keep it together idk and like say things that would be unimaginable for normal pedro. (idk like just imagining him yelling or being like pissy and talking back to paparazzi or smothing is just whhwiwjwbwjwowiw to me) but its like sweet af, because it shows how much he cares about you. and that u are everything to him and whateverrrrr 🥺

idea ig idk

hm i will be back !!!! 😌 with more hc!! because this man had taken over me heh 😞

-thankful anon again as always still greatful for marked universe, m/gn content and the new fluffy fic that included oscar and the edibles ooohhhh so cute i melted !!!!!

I love where your head is at. Veered left with this one, hope it went vaguely where you were hoping. Thank you for the rec! :) Come back anytime. piss yellow range rover (pedro pascal x gn/m!reader)

a/n: same vague universe as “marked.” apparently no one comments on this app anymore but they are my favorite so please drop a line!!

tw: gay slur in the middle. trans character, trans writer.

summary: baby's first homophobia

————————————————————————

You’re surprised it took so long, really. 

A full month after Pedro’s Tonight Show interview goes viral. After his SNL debut, the following week he spends holed up recovering, his begrudging return to LA for Mando press, and your reunion in the LAX Arrivals driveway two weeks later. Four full weeks— long enough that it no longer gripped teeth into the front of your mind. 

Long enough that your guard was down. 

Until, of course, some asshole decided he needed to be tastefully homophobic before his morning cup of coffee. 

You were midway through your LA morning routine: parting with Pedro in the parking lot of the strip mall that housed his personal trainer, and timing your long run around the surrounding area with the duration of his session, such that you were back to pick up a 2-drink mobile order at Starbucks by the time he emerged.

Your very normal, palatable oat latte was balanced atop his stomach-turning 6 black espresso shots, as you watched Pedro round the corner through the window. 

Sweat is beading at his temple, but he is all smiles as he trades you a kiss for his plastic cup.

It still feels like a novelty. Neither of you are usually PDA people, but the sudden lack of secrecy has brought on a second wave of the honeymoon phase. You can just do things like this, now— kiss in Starbucks or hold hands at restaurants or be seen grocery shopping together. You don’t have to take separate Ubers to the same place on date nights. 

The sun is shining, your iced latte was made right, your workout is over. There is a whole day in front of you, and a handsome man beside you. A man who holds the Starbucks door for both you and the woman pushing a stroller inside— but only reaches for your hand after. 

Things are actually really, really good. 

Until you step off the curb: 

“That is not the way. Fuckin’ fags.” 

Crazy how quickly some guy sipping a green goddamn smoothie can ruin your peace. Two guys, actually, snickering to each other as they unlock their car. 

Beside you, Pedro goes incredibly still. He drops your hand. 

“What did you just say?” 

His friend, chewing on his straw, grins as your stomach turns. A shit-eating grin. “At least it’s kinda straight, right? Dude’s got a pussy.” 

They erupt into laughter.  

White noise buzzes in your ear; your cheeks flush. “Come on.” 

You break away, towards the car, but his feet are rooted to the ground. “Pedro. Come on.” 

They are still laughing as they duck behind the tinted windows of a piss yellow Land Rover. Laughing as they close the door. 

Laughing as five and a half shots of espresso splatter across their black-tinted windshield, streaking in brown rivulets down the yellow hood. 

Pedro turns, finally, and stalks quickly across the lot. You have to jog to keep up. Behind you, the assholes are yelling profanities, but you don’t hear a car door open. Cowards. 

The moment he settles into the drivers seat, Pedro pounds a fist on the dashboard. Hard. His fingers curl into a tight grip around the steering wheel, which he clutches like a lifeline as he draws in a handful of ragged breaths. 

You can only watch from the passenger seat. Try and ignore the fact that he won’t look at you as he starts the engine and peels out of the lot. 

The drive to the Hills is dead silent. Even the radio can read the room. 

Silence acts as a breeding ground for your racing thoughts, which multiply like hatching mosquitos. Your ears are still ringing. Buzzing. 

It’s your fault— this is a fact. This was his biggest fear, wasn’t it? The backlash? This didn’t happen before he came out. (Before you forced him to come out, though he swears that wasn’t the case. You’d just finally, maybe begun to believe it, after a month. Or not.)

This happened to you, sure. Less so in New York, or LA. It’s almost funny, that you apparently stumbled across two of the only straight people in LA this morning.  Shitty people live everywhere. 

You’d both disabled the comments section of your instagram for a few days, but by and large, the feedback had been overwhelmingly positive. Until today. It’s different hearing it face-to-face. 

Pedro is halfway into the house before you realize you’re home. Slowly unbuckling, you debate leaving the iced latte in the cupholder; the thought of it turns your stomach. 

As you greet the dogs by the door, a distracted ‘hello,’ you watch him slip out to the condo balcony. He is clutching a pack of Spirits in a clenched fist. 

What are you supposed to do? There is nothing you can do, besides apologize. You pace between the kitchen and living room, chewing on your cuticles, eyes closed. The sweat from your run has now cooled uncomfortably on your skin. An apology won’t be enough, but you don’t have a solution. You can’t take it back. He can’t come un-out. 

The balcony door slides open, and Pedro is still silent as he shuffles to the kitchen. He pours a glass of water— out of habit, you assume. Though you never mind, he always washes the taste of tobacco away, after he smokes. Refuses to kiss you until after he’s cleansed his mouth, lest he leave any trace of stale smoke on your lips. 

Before you can really register, he has crossed into the living room, and pressed his lips to your own. 

He kisses you softly, and then moves to your forehead, eyebrow, temple, along your jaw. Doesn’t go as far as your neck, which he knows you are sensitive to— these kisses are not foreplay. They’re too light, too quiet. Your eyes flutter closed. 

Pedro’s chin hooks over the top of your head. His arms wrap around your shoulders. Your cheek presses against the base of his neck. 

“I’m sorry,” he says, before weakly clearing his throat.  “I don’t know why I did that. I don’t know what came over me.” 

“Why are you sorry?” You pick your head up. “You have nothing to be sorry for. I’m sorry.” 

“Why are you sorry? You… handled that so well, querido. I lost my shit. I have never gotten physical like that before, I don’t know what came over me. I’m not violent. They were just… they can’t say that. It’s not right.” 

It is your turn to reach up, place a kiss on the angle of his jaw. “You are not violent. You did not lose your shit.” 

“It was a perfectly good coffee,” he pouts. 

“We can get another,” you placate, “but I can’t get another you. People are always gonna say shit. It’s kinda nice to have something so good, it makes people mad.” 

Pedro chuckles, weakly. “Yeah. I guess.” 

“If it’s easier to lay off for a bit, though—“ 

“Lay off?” His brow furrows. 

You rub a hand up and down his arm, lightly. “The PDA, doing public stuff, I dunno. I don’t want you to—“ 

“Are you joking?” You are given a look of sheer disbelief. “Jesus, no. Isn’t that what they want? You want them to win?” 

“It’s not a competition, Pedge. I want you to be safe, and comfortable.” 

“Fuck that!” His exclamation is loud enough to startle Edgar, whose collar jingles as he jumps grumpily off the couch. “I love you. We went through too much shit, to not be able to hold your hand outside a fucking Starbucks.” 

Pedro’s hair is a little tousled, cheeks a little flushed. He’s maybe never looked more attractive to you. 

“Okay?” 

You exhale. “Of course.” 

There is a pause, as the morning settles back around you. The sun is still shining, your workouts are still behind you. Plenty of time in the day to walk to a different Starbucks, for another round of drinks. Maybe you’ll hold hands on the way there. You can, if you want to. 

Pedro tugs on the collar of his white t-shirt. He grimaces. “Can we shower, though? I think I smell like the ocean.” 

You don’t mind. 

[elfqueen006]

Varsity Blue, Yellow, and Red

Sunny Day Jack x Reader

CW/Tags: drinking, harassment but light, possession, college au

---

You’d only taken a small sip and within minutes were bracing yourself against the wall. Yep. The punch was spiked. Booze was already present at the afterparty, you knew. The air stank of alcohol at every turn. You didn’t even have to glance at people’s cups to know they were in the process of getting wasted. Hell, many others carried whole bottles of aged wine and beer, taking the contents straight to the head. So it was only a matter of time before someone dumped their entire stock into the punch bowl.

You sip your drink again. It wasn’t as strong as the first. Though, maybe the effects of the alcohol were relaxing your mind, making you less sensitive to it. It didn’t taste awful at least. The cherry punch was to thank for that. It left a kind of sour aftertaste rather than the pungent bitterness that assaulted your senses.

You then shrug and continue to nurse your drink, scoping the scene like the wallflower you were meant to be.

Fryer State had won its final game of the semester. And it was decided that the afterparty would be held inside the apartment of one of your schools’ football players. Pizza and drinks alike were already provided. Though there was the unspoken rule that those who didn’t trust the system provided, brought their own. A rule you forgot, much to your dismay.  You’d meant to bring bottled water and have some pizza, but you’d left it in your fridge all the way back at your dorm. But you pretended not to, for no reason in particular.

It was an honest mistake after all, and so long as you didn’t overdo it, you were a-okay!

Still, aside from being pushed up in a corner like a rat from its hidey hole, you couldn’t help but feel like you were on the outside looking in. All because of the single thought continuously running through your mind: “They don’t know I’m being haunted by a ghost clown.”

Jack stood beside you, bobbing his head offbeat to the music blaring over the radio. “I didn’t know people still carried boomboxes!” He said.

“Just those that have a lot of parties, or listen to a lot of music.” You muttered into your cup. It comforted you that people still owned CD radios. Your parents used to have one in the house when you were a kid. But since converting a lot to streaming, they’d eventually gotten a bluetooth speaker. Which was cool and all, but it was refreshing to revert back to old times.

“What do you think of my new look, Sunshine?” Jack popped the collar of his newly styled letterman jacket. It had the traditional colors of his original vest, though the material was slightly altered to fit a varsity theme and decorated with patches of the sun, bunnies, and his initials of S, D, and J – all that he manifested out of thin air as soon as you made it to the apartment.

“You look good. Big man on campus.” You said.

A guy looked over at you, “Huh?” You waved him off, then decided to pop in your earbuds. The go to method when talking to Jack in public so you didn’t look like a crazy person. The party was loud, but somebody was bound to hear.

“Maybe you should go to a different corner?” Jack asked.

You shrugged, “Nah, I’m chillin’.”

“Keep your guard up, sunshine. I want you to enjoy yourself, but these parties are notorious for debauched activity.” Jack said. “You don’t want to find yourself swept up in the chaos.”

You almost wished you could agree. The college scene wasn’t anything like the movies portrayed it; there were no frat parties every night, no hot professors, the athletes weren’t chasing cheerleaders by their skirts, and there weren’t any cliques. Well, the cliques thing was still kind of a thing. There were a lot of attractive people who hung out with each other. People in the same Greek houses hung in the same circles. You even hung out with a group for a while before being … well, for lack of a better term, moved out.

It might’ve very well been your first experience with college bullying! It was fast and somewhat sobering in figuring out who to really trust. But you were on your own for a while, so after that, campus life became notably dull…

Shaking off the melancholic haze you mutter, “I’ll be fine.”

You could see Jack’s concerned look in the corner of your eye as he tilted his head like a lost puppy dog. You hid your loneliness well under the nonchalant body language. But Jack could see how distant you were at that moment. The way your eyes longingly followed the laughter, gossip, and raunchy party games… It was heartbreaking. 

Truthfully, Jack had wanted you to stay in with him tonight while you two binged Christmas movies. But you’d wanted to end the semester by going outside your comfort zone. And yet here you were, plastered to the wall.

Finally, after mulling it over, he nudged you lightly. You look up at him, lightly touching your earpiece.

He points to the group of jocks and cheerleaders over at a table. They’re playing beer pong. “That seems fun! Why don’t you head over and try your luck?”

Your brows raised, “Really?”

He smiled with a shrug, “Sure, why not?”

You hesitated, looking between the group and your friend. “But what about you?”

“I’ll be right there! In fact, consider me your official spotter!”

A grin breaks out on your face. You were actually afraid that Jack wouldn’t like you hanging out with people here. You knew he was looking out for your best interest, but a lot of times when he managed to pry you away from others, he was notably clingy and almost came off like an overprotective mother.

You were grateful he was being this considerate despite himself.

You wasted no time, downing the rest of your drink and rushing over to the group of athletes.

—

It was only the third. Round. How could you be tipsy already on the third round!

Jack’s nerves were hanging on by a thread as a random guy came up behind you to hold your shoulders, presumably to steady you. But he could swear that if he looked close enough his thumbs were caressing you ever so tenderly as he leaned in and whispered to you. Processing his words, you double over in laughter. The jock wraps his arms around your torso, following you in laughter as he pulls you close.

“Cash, what’d you tell that girl?” A cheerleader on the couch asked.

Cash rolled his eyes, “There’s a reason I whispered it, nosey.” He placed his head on your shoulder, leaning in next to your ear, “Isn’t that right, baby?”

“Baby?” Jack exclaimed. 

You then waved to your unseen friend, “Heyyy, Jack!” you said, “I forgot you were there.”

The spectators chortled in response.

“Oh hell no, this bitch is trippin’!”

“She’s drunk as hell!”

Your sudden outburst didn't hinder Cash one bit; the young man's hands trailing up your shirt, rubbing your stomach in a circular motion that made you hum in contentment. The scene made Jack fume, and the phantom sound of what would've been his heart was ringing in his ears. It was so clear what Cash was intending to do, and yet nobody was stopping it. In fact, they looked on in interest, as if the jock were putting on a private show to see just how far he'd go.

No longer able - nor willing - to stand by. Jack marched up to your body. His influence swiftly sobering you.

You straightened up and stretched out your limbs, the joints popping. You wriggle out of Cashs’ grip. “I gotta go, it's getting late.” It sounded odd, Jack using your voice. It was surely yours, but it had more projection and pep than your usual tone.

The man grabbed your wrist, “Late?” he scoffed, “It's not even past midnight.”

You turn and give him a curt smile, “I have finals tomorrow. You understand, right?”

"Baby-”

“Don't call me that.”

“-Can't you stay for one more round?”

You hum, glancing over at the arrangement of cups. You then tip the table slightly, knocking them all down. There's cries of protest and curses from the people on the couch, and some spectators watch on in intrigue.

Cash furrows his brows, “What the fuck did you do that for!?”

“If you can rearrange those before I get to the door, I might stay another round. Otherwise, goodbye.” You said, beaming.

—

Jack was worn out from using your body. But he thankfully had enough energy to get you to dorms, wash you and put on your pajamas before getting you into bed.

Finally getting to his own, he flopped down on the bed, sighing in exhaustion. He then glanced over at your sleeping form. You were really out. He expected some light stirring or bleariness after leaving your body but you were still as a brick. Breathing, thankfully, but otherwise undisturbed. 

It probably wasn't a good idea to provoke them like that. But from what he could tell, most of the people at that party were seniors. They wouldn't be here next year to harass you, thankfully. 

Jack shuffled up the bed, next to you. He hugged you close to his chest and threw an arm over your torso. “You partied too hard, but thankfully we got you to the dorms safely.” He muttered into your ear.

That's what he'd tell you when you woke up. And it was mostly true. But it's not like you could blame him for doing what he did. You would've been in a lot of trouble if he just stood by.

Honestly, what would you do without him?

[deiongill]

Today I am 8 days into quitting vaping after 4 years. To be honest, it was a lot easier than I expected. I’ve done my fair share of googles on what quitting vaping and nicotine all together is like, so I assumed that I would be in a constant state of panic for 2 weeks straight with some of the worst symptoms known to man. Was I being dramatic to think that? Yes. Was I crazy to think that and also be so down to white knuckle it and quit semi-cold turkey? Maybe. Now I’ve had a few days in the past week where the motion sickness, irritability and constant background headaches were a lot to handle, but I honestly made it through pretty smoothly.

It was a very simple and quiet decision that I made to quit entirely, and it was in 3 steps that I made it happen and got to the point where I’m typing this without the urge to pick it back up again after only 8 days. The first step was no longer buying new vapes, so I could only hit the near-empty ones I had lying around the house. Not a very glamorous thing to say out loud seeing that I had about 15 of them hiding in random places in my apartment and car, but nonetheless it helped to get the process started. The faded and worn out flavor, plus the disappointing lack of “smoke” exhaled from each hit felt like it was training my brain to no longer rely on vaping to give me the same sense of satisfaction that I once received from it. The experience was now a lackluster excuse for a bad habit. Did I continue to do it? Absolutely. I reluctantly used up all 15 of the near empty vapes in about 2 weeks, and by the end of it I was almost glad to be done with them.

Step 2 was a huge jump, but somehow it felt easy. Here’s what happened leading up to it in reality… I cheated the process, but not without good reason. I finished my last used vape on the way to the airport to fly out to Atlanta to see my family for 2 days during Christmas. When I landed and got picked up, I had already decided in my mind that I was going to buy one last vape for this trip, because I couldn’t bear to let the withdrawals kick in while I was with my family. That was just something I didn’t see going well. So I purchased myself a cheat day vape and went about my holiday before throwing it out as I left for the airport to head back to LA. Step 2 was now in effect. This was the rule of no longer having any vapes to myself, and only being able to take 1 hit of my best friend and roommate Crispin’s vape per day. Luckily I was in the studio for the majority of my time during this phase, so I would either come home around 9pm and hit it once after a full day, or, if I wasn’t in the studio, wait until about 3pm after I had already worked out or hiked before allowing myself to knock on his bedroom door and be met with his answer before I even asked the question.

Step 2 lasted for about a week and some change, and on January 5th, something miraculous happened in perfect timing. I was in an all-day session until 10-11 pm that night and returned home to take a nap before needing to drive Crispin to the airport early in the morning. He was already asleep and I didn’t want to wake him up with my nicotine junkie tendencies, so I refrained from knocking on his door. Somehow, without even noticing it, the clock had struck midnight and I had officially made it a full 24 hours without vaping at all. Not even a single hit. It didn’t occur to me until I was getting back up out of bed to leave for the airport, but when it did I was surprised and proud. I decided that there was no turning back from it, and I would go without my Elliot Smith-esque last hit moment. There was no fond farewell to a friend. I had officially quit vaping for good. It was time for step 3.

This past week has been strange when it comes to the specific experience of completely quitting. I remember moments of nausea, headaches, lack of focus, and compulsive eating, but never once did I feel the urge to make all the discomfort disappear by taking the easy way out. I stood on the word that I gave to myself and refused to budge. I gained a lot of respect for myself this week, respect that was earned by choosing my future over my present. I showed myself tough love, real care and kept a promise. I don’t know what version of me is going to be able to see that promise come full circle and be able to say “I’m so thankful I made that decision”, but I’m looking forward to being that version of myself, no matter how far away that is. I proved that I’m worth being looked out for, taken care of, and respected, even if only by myself. I showed myself that I matter by doing this, and I set an example for all the other parts of me that I want to work on and improve. If I can do this, what else can I do?

[scarisd3ad]

Promptober day 25 - telling scary stories

Pairing - no ship just cute Sophia Carl and reader shit

Warnings - none

Promptober ‘23 masterlist

Main masterlist

Taglist

a/n - again reader is the same from day 7 (so glenn is like her gaurdian) because i love her and lowkey want to make it into a full series.

While the adults were chatting, Sophia, Carl, and I gathered in a little circle close to the fire. Everyone had finished eating about 10 minutes ago and now everyone had started their little conversations. "Rem-remember when Daryl told the story about the chupacabra?!" I whisper yell through giggles, which makes both Carl and Sophia burst out in laughter. "What even is a chupacabra??" Sophia says as her brows furrow together. "I dunno- he's looking at us," I whisper as I turn to look at the group of adults behind me. Daryl's brows were furrowed together as he glared at us. I turn back towards Sophia and Carl. My eyes widen before I burst out in laughter again.

"he's so weird" I whisper, "Shane said he's crazy, thinks him and his brother went to jail" Carl whispers back. I shrug "My mama said he seems nice, but daddy said he's an…" Sophia stops before lowering her voice a bit more "A-hole" I giggle as I cover my mouth "Oh. Glenn doesn't mind him."

"let's tell scary stories!" Sophia proposes as she adjusts the way she is sitting. "Hm my dad he-he gave me a book full of scary stories I-I let me see if I can remember any of them" I whisper. I had left the book at home before my mother and I had fled our house, and now I wish I had grabbed it. "I've got one, I've got one" Sophia exclaims as she sits up straight "Right um…there was this girl named…um Tina and she was walking in the woods when she heard a loud scream-"

"Why was she walking in the woods?" Carl cuts Sophia off with his brows furrowed together. she lets out a frustrated sigh as her brow furrows together as well "I don't know it's just part of the story" She then begins narrating the story once again. "As I was saying she heard a loud scream" The story wasn't scary, it was a story I had heard and read about several times a girl walking in the woods and then she found something horrifying. It wasn't even scary until the end "She looked around searching for where the sound had come from when she felt a ha-" I felt a hand place on my shoulder which made me jolt away in terror as I let out a loud screech. I look over to see Carl with a stupid grin on his face. everyone's staring which makes my cheeks flush with embarrassment as my hand slaps across my lips. "I-I'm sorry" I murmur as I lower my head in embarrassment. Both Carl and Sophia erupt in laughter "Stop it's not funny you're so mean" I cry out as I swat at Carl's shoulder. "It is so funny," Carl says with a shit-eating grin as I cross my arms over my chest with a little pout on my lips.

Taglist

@leonkennedylefthand @maexyn @truecobblepot @mfnqueen1 @zoey5252 @nezukos-number1fan @bxbyyyjocelyn @dr3amyk1ng

[windsweptinred]

Get To Know Me Game

Thank you for the tag @dream-of-the-bitchless. These were so random, I loved it. 😆❤️

Who was your first fictional crush?:

I'd say either Poison Ivy from the 90s Batman cartoon or Esmerelda from Disney's Hunchback of Notre Dame. Cleverly disguised in my young mind as 'I want to be her.'

What’s the first colour you think of when I tell you to think of a colour?:

I'm pretty sure people who barely know of my existence here on ye oldie tumblr could still answer this one. 😅 But red.

Which fanfiction emotionally scarred you and still makes you shudder to this day?:

Left in the Darkness by locamohita456. It's an AU fic that sees Desire captured instead of Dream. I can't begin to state how phenomenonal this fic is. But dear god mind the warnings on your way in, it's a hard read in places and left me doing a whole lot of wall staring.

I’m coming to your house for dinner, non-negotiable, what are you making me?:

You're getting the same thing my daughters friends get when they visit, which is pizza and icecream. I might even order in. A good time shall be had with no airs and graces expected.

Do you prefer lions or kangaroos?:

I would have to say lions, but I admire kangaroos particular breed of tomfuckery. I learnt the other day they like to punch over astrophotographers camera/telescopes. And I love that. 😆

Which fictional villain do you brush past the glaringly obvious issues for because you really like them?:

I believe the correct question is, which fictional villian do I not brush past? But I probably let Armitage Hux get away with the most daddy issue based war crimes. Did he wipe out an entire planet? ... Yes. Is he still my precious little baby... Also yes. I make no excuses, he's a little shit and I love him. 😆

What would accompany your picture in the Burn Book in Mean Girls?:

I dunno... Bi Bush, wanders the moors dressed like Kate Bush in her most wuthered era. Most potential for crazy cat lady retirement plans. Life goals by the way. Just me and my hoard of moggies, meandering on the moors. The talk of the village Facebook group. 😆

How many days would you last in the universe of your favourite fandom?:

The Sandman? 🤔 Well, considering I'd be heading straight for the Garden of Forking Ways to live out my life in its quiet, gothic landscape, I'd probably be fine. It's the most drama free location in the Sandman. Unless Destiny doesn't like visitors... Then it could turn into some weird, horticultural version of It Follows... 😨

Have you heard of Mischief Theatre?:

"There was a goose that was porked by a ham,

I have a sausage as I am a man." 🤣

Do you feel sorry for Medusa?:

I feel angry for Medusa. Burn the world my darling, you've more then earnt the right.

Which song makes you think of your OTP?:

Oooooo, let's see, I have three for Corinthiel

The Devil and the Huntsman by Daniel Pemberton

Air That I Breathe by the Hollies

I Was Made For Loving you by Kiss

Also to this day I can't hear Tender by Blur without thinking of Dreamling

Which song makes you disassociate and daydream the fastest?:

It's not a song, it's a piece of music. But Dance of the Druids from Outlander by Bear McCreary.

Tagging @zigzag-wanderer, @mashumaru, @bobbole, @seiya-starsniper, @thelostkelpie and @marvagon to have a go if you wish to. 😊

[ofaflower]

𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐓𝐔𝐑𝐄𝐃 𝐏𝐎𝐄𝐓𝐒 𝐃𝐄𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐌𝐄𝐍𝐓 - 𝐓𝐀𝐘𝐋𝐎𝐑 𝐒𝐖𝐈𝐅𝐓

The following are lyric based starters from Taylor Swift's eleventh studio album, The Tortured Poets Department (Standard Version). Mature subjects implied within, so please use with caution. Feel free to change pronoun usage as needed. Minor edits may appear to sound more natural for dialogue. Link to 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐀𝐍𝐓𝐇𝐎𝐋𝐎𝐆𝐘.

FORTNIGHT (FT. POST MALONE)

i was supposed to be sent away, but they forgot to come and get me

i was a functioning alcoholic

nobody noticed my new aesthetic

all of this to say, i hope you're okay

you're the reason

no one here's to blame

what about your quiet treason?

we were forever

your wife waters flowers

i wanna kill her

i took the miracle move on drug, the effects were temporary

i love you, it's ruining my life

my husband is cheating, i wanna kill him

it won't start up

THE TORTURED POETS DEPARTMENT

you left your typewriter at my apartment

straight from the tortured poets department

who uses typewriters anyway?

you're in self sabotage mode

i've seen this episode, still i love the show

who else decodes you?

who's gonna hold you like me?

who's gonna know you, if not me?

you're not dylan thomas, i'm not patti smith

this ain't the chelsea hotel

we're modern idiots

nobody, no fucking body

i chose this cyclone with you

sometimes i wonder if you're gonna screw this up with me

you told lucy you'd kill yourself if i ever leave

i felt seen

everyone we know understands why we're meant to be - cause we're crazy

you took my ring off my middle finger and put it on the one people put wedding rings on - and that's the closest i've come to my heart exploding

MY BOY ONLY BREAKS HIS FAVOURITE TOYS

oh, here we go again...

the voices in his head called the rain to end our days of wild

you should've seen him when he first got me

my boy only breaks his favourite toys

i'm queen of sandcastles he destroys

i should've known it was a matter of time

there was a litany of reasons why we could've played for keeps this time

i know i'm just repeating myself

he runs because he loves me

once i fix me, he's gonna miss me

just say when, i'd play again

you were my best friend

you told me i'm better off, but i'm not

DOWN BAD

did you really beam me up, in a cloud of sparkling dust, just to do experiments on?

you told me i was the chosen one

you showed me this world was bigger than us, then sent me back where i came from

for a moment, i new cosmic love

fuck it if i can't have him

i might just die, it would make no difference

come back and pick me up

fuck it if i can't have us

i might just not get up, i might stay down bad

did you take all my old clothes?

my same old town, somehow feels so hollow now

they'll say i'm nuts if i talk about the existence of you

for a moment i was heaven struck

i loved your hostile takeovers

how can you say that it's over?

how dare you think it's romantic, leaving me safe and stranded

fuck it, i was in love

fuck you if i can't have us

SO LONG, LONDON

so long, london

i saw, in my mind, fairy lights through the mist

i kept calm and carried the weight of the rift

i pulled him in tighter each time he was drifting away

i stopped trying to make you laugh

how much sad did you think i had in me?

oh, the tragedy

you'll find someone

i didn't opt in to be your odd man out

i founded the club you've heard great things about

i left all i knew, then you left me at the house by the heath

i stopped cpr, after all it's no use

i'm pissed off you let me give you all that youth for free

i'll find someone

you say i abandoned the ship, but i was going down with it with my white knuckle iron grip holding tight to your quiet resentment

it isn't right to be scared everyday of a love affair

every breath feels like rarest air when you're unsure if he wants to be there

just how long did you think i'd go before i self-implode and have to go free?

you swore that you loved me, but where were the clues?

i died on the alter waiting

you sacrificed us to the blue of your darkest days

i'm just getting colour back into my face

i'm just mad as hell cause i loved this place for so long

we had a good run

a moment of sun

i'm not the one

BUT DADDY I LOVE HIM

i forget how the west was won

i forget if this was ever fun

i just learned these people only raise you to cage you

what a mess

these people try and "save you", cause they hate you

they slammed the door on my whole world and the one thing i wanted

but daddy i love him

i'm having his baby - no i'm not, but you should see your faces

i'm having his baby

floor it through the fences

no, i'm not "coming to my senses"

i know he's crazy but he's the one i want

all my plans were laid

growing up precocious sometimes means not growing up at all

stay away from her

i'll tell you something right now, i'd rather burn my whole life down than listen to one more second of all this bitching and moaning

let me tell you about my good name, it's mine alone to disgrace

i dont' cater to all these vipers dressed in empath's clothing

god save the most judgmental creeps

you ain't gotta pray for me

fuck 'em - it's over

time, doesn't it give some perspective?

no, you can't come to the wedding

FRESH OUT THE SLAMMER

now pretty baby, i'm running back home to you

fresh out the slammer, i know who my first call will be to

he don't understand me

you were with me in dreams

it's gonna be alright, i did my time

i was handcuffed to the spell i was under

now i know better and i'll never lose my baby again

all those nights, you kept me going

you weaved me into all of your poems

no matter what i've done - it wouldn't matter away

ain't no way i'm gonna screw up now that i know what's at stake here

FLORIDA!!! (FEAT. FLORENCE + THE MACHINE)

you can beat the heat if you beat the charges too

they said i was cheat, so i guess it must be true

my friends all smell like weed or little babies

the city reeks of driving myself crazy

little did you know, your home's really only a town you're just a guest in

packed my life away just stay in a timeshare down in destin, florida

florida is one hell of a drug

florida will use you up

i got drunk and dared it wash me away

me and my ghosts, we had a hell of a time

yes, i'm haunted but i'm feeling just fine

all of my girls have got their lace and their crimes

your cheating husband disappeared?

well, no one asks any questions here

i did my best to lay to rest all of the bodies that'd ever been on my body where in my mind they sink into the swamp

is that a bad thing to say in a song?

i need to forget

take me to florida

i've got some regrets, i'll bury them in florida

tell me i'm despicable, say it's unforgivable

at least the dolls were beautiful

fuck me up, florida

GUILTY AS SIN?

he sent me "downtown lights", i hadn't heard it in a while

my boredom's bone deep

this cage was once just fine

am i allowed to cry?

i dream of cracking locks and throwing my life to the wolves - or the ocean rocks

i'm seeing visions

am i bad or mad or wise?

what if he's written "mine" on my upper thigh, only in my mind?

oh, what a way to die

i keep recalling things we never did

how i long for our tryst

without ever touching your skin, how can i be guilty as sin?

i keep these longings locked in lowercase inside a vault

someone told me: there's no such thing as bad thoughts - only your actions talk

we've already done it in my head

if it's make believe, why does it feel like a vow we'll both uphold somehow?

my bedsheets were ablaze, i screamed your name

what if i roll the stone away?

they're gonna crucify me anyway?

what if the way you hold me is actually what's holy?

if long suffering propriety is what they want from me, they don't know how you've haunted me so suddenly

i choose you and me, religiously

WHO'S AFRAID OF LITTLE OLD ME?

the who's who of "who's that?" - is poised for the attack

my bare hands paved their path

you don't get to tell me about sad

if you wanted me dead, you should've just said

nothing makes me feel more alive

she'll leap from the gallows and levitate down our street

who's afraid of little old me?

the scandal was contained

the bullet had just grazed

at all costs, keep your good name

you don't get to tell me you feel bad

is it a wonder i broke? let's hear one more joke then we can all just laugh until i cry

i was tame, i was gentle til the circus life made me mean

don't you worry folks, we took out all her teeth

who's afraid of little old me? you should be

so tell me everything is not about me - but what if it is?

they say they didn't do it to hurt me - but what if they did?

i wanna snarl and show you just how disturbed this has made me

you wouldn't last an hour in the asylum where they raised me

all your kids can sneak into my house with all the cobwebs

i'm always drunk on my own tears, isn't that what they all say?

i'll sue you if you step on my lawn

i'm fearsome, and i'm wretched, and i'm wrong

i put narcotics into all of my songs, that's why you're still singing along

you lured me, you caged me, and you taught me

you caged me then called me crazy

i am what i am cause you trained me

who's afraid of me?

I CAN FIX HIM (NO REALLY, I CAN)

the jokes he told across the bar were revolting and way too loud

god help her

he's my man

but your good lord doesn't need to lift a finger

i can i fix him, no really - i can

the dopamine raced through his brain on a six-lane texas highway

i could see it from a mile away

you're a perfect case for my certain skill set

he had a halo of the highest grade

he just hadn't met me yet

i can fix him

only i can

good boy, that's right - come close

i'll show you heaven if you'll be an angel all night

trust me, i can handle me a dangerous man

whoa, maybe i can't...

loml

who's gonna stop us from falling back into rekindled flames if we know the steps anyway?

we embroidered memories of my time away, stitching "we were just kids babe"

i don't mind, it takes time

thought that i was better safe than starry-eyed

i felt aglow like this - never before and never since

if you know it in one glimpses, it's legendary

you and i went from one kiss to getting married

you low down boy, you stand up guy

you told me i'm the love of your life about a million times

who's gonna tell me the truth when you blew in with the winds of fate, saying i had reformed you?

your impressionist paintings of us turned out to be fakes

well, you dragged me to hell too

a con man sells a fool a get-love-quick scheme

i felt a hole, like this - never before and ever since

what we thought was for all time, was temporary

mister "steal your girl, and make her cry"

you said i'm the love of your life

you shit talked me under tables, talking rings and talking cradles

i wish i could un-recall how we almost had it all

are they second-hand embarrassed?

i can't get out of bed cause something counterfeit's dead

it was legendary

it was momentary

it was unnecessary

should've let us stay buried

what a valiant roar

what a bland goodbye

the coward claimed he was a lion

i'll never leave

never mind

i'll still see it til i die

you're the loss of my life

I CAN DO IT WITH A BROKEN HEART

i can read your mind

she's having the time of her life

in her glittering prime the light refracts sequin stars off her silhouette every night

i can show you lies

i'm a real tough kid

i can handle my shit

they said "fake it til you make it", and i did

lights, camera, bitch, smile - even when you wanna die

he said he'd love me all his life - but that life was quite short

all the pieces of me shattered as the crowd was chanting more

i can do it with a broken heart

i'm so depressed, i act like it's my birthday everyday

i'm so obsessed with him but he avoids me like the plague

i cry alot, but i am so productive - it's an art

you know you're good when you can even do it with a broken heart

i can hold my breath, i've been doing it since you left

i'm sure i can pass this test

he said he'd love me for all time but that time was quite short

i'm miserable and nobody even knows!

THE SMALLEST MAN WHO EVER LIVED

was any of it true?

gazing at me starry-eyed in your jehovah's witness suit, who the fuck was that guy?

he tried to buy some pills from a friend of friends of mine

they just ghosted you, now you know what it feels like

i don't even want you back, i just want to know if rusting my sparkling summer was the goal?

i don't miss what we had but could someone give a message to the smallest man who ever lived?

you hung me on your wall, stacked me with your push pins where in public you showed me off - then sank to stoned oblivion

once your queen had come, you treat her like an also-ran

you didn't measure up in any measure of a man

were you sent by someone who wanted me dead?

did you sleep with a gun underneath our bed?

were you writing a book?

were you a sleeper cell spy?

in fifty years, will all this be declassified and you'll confess why you did it

good riddance

it wasn't sexy once it wasn't forbidden

i would have died for your sins, instead i just died inside

you deserve prison but you won't get time

you'll slide into inboxes and slip through the bars

you crashed my party and your rental car

you said normal girls were boring, but you were gone by the morning

in plain sight you hid

you are what you did

i'll forget you but i'll never forgive the smallest man who ever lived

THE ALCHEMY

this happens once every few lifetimes

what if i told you i'm back?

the hospital was a drag, worst sleep that i ever had

i haven't come around in so long, but i'm coming back so strong

so when i touch down, call the amateurs and cut them from the team

ditch the clowns, get the crown

baby, i'm the one to beat

the sign on your heart says it's still reserved for me

honestly, who are we to fight the alchemy?

hey you, what if i told you we're cool? that child's play back in school is forgiven under my rule

i'm making a comeback to where i belong

these blokes warm the benches

we've been on a winning streak

he jokes that it's "heroin", but this time with an "E"

there's no chance try to beat the greatest in the league?

where's the trophy?

CLARA BOW

you look like clara bow in this light, remarkable

all your life, did you know you'd be picked, like a rose?

i'm not trying to exaggerate - but i think i might die if it happened to me

no one in my small town thought i'd see the lights of manhattan

this town is fake, but you're the real thing

a breath of fresh air through smoke rings

take the glory

give everything

promise to be dazzling

you look like stevie nicks in '75, the hair and lips

the crowd goes wild at your fingertips

i think i might if i made it

no one in my small town thought i'd meet these suits in L.A.

beauty is a beast that roars down on all fours demanding more

only when your girlish glow flickers just so, do they let you know

it's hell on earth to be heavenly

them's the breaks they don't come gently

you look like taylor swift in this light, we're loving it

you've got edge, she never did

the future's bright

dazzling