#bc what are boundaries? they don't know her
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I feel like I'm missing something... Isn't stuff like "takes pictures of her latter" an issue for these guys predominantly because of the stereotype of what kind of person you'd have to be to take pictures of your latte? Like bear with me, as a bi person, I'd never date a dude who regularly posts about cars not because I think this is bad in and of itself but because it presents a different issue - most car dudes are gonna ask you something about car specs and have this smug look of superiority when they realize you have no damn clue about what the shit they're saying, be you a man or woman. And I don't want that. I don't wanna risk encountering that. It'd be annoying.
Like, girls with cat ear headphones? They tend to love cutesy things, in that very specific way, and IN MY EXPERIENCE (could be very wrong) tend to have an infantilizing view of their own gender ("girl math", "I'm such a stupid girl", "girls can't know [Man Thing]" etc). In America, brightly colored hair has become (probably unfairly) associated with strong activism and niche views like being an anarchist or socialist.
What I'm saying is, sure, these CAN be dumb, but that's not necessarily always the case - it COULD be about preference or some other incompatibility that's being accounted for ahead of time. And I'd assume equivalents of your "egotistical manchild" and other mentioned criteria is, you know, kind of a given? At the end of the day the simpler reasons to not date someone are always more interesting and descriptive of your preferences bc no shit you're not gonna date some woman who always demands to check your phone or some guy who can't stop bragging about his generational wealth. Those are very normal and typical boundaries and thus not really worth the effort to list seriously, so it's more efficient to immediately move onto the small stuff.
At least, that's how I've always thought of it. Idk I don't have a lot of guys I hang out with and we never talk about dating.
The longer I exist as a loudly proudly gay man the more I think that cishet men aren't actually attracted to women.
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there is something funny about the worry of being parasocial in regards to witnessing my bullshit rn. like. as if i'm not the one telling all my business on the internet. i feel like the terms "parasocial attachment" and "traumadump" rose in popularity at a very inconvenient time for my breakdown
#people are like well i don't want to be parasocial.... you're NOT you're literally talking right to me#and at this point i couldn't give a fuck about anything like what boundaries. i think if someone was like#hey i'm parked outside i've been following you i'd go out there and cry in their murder truck abt my bullshit#i think you have to be concerned about your long term safety in order to be concerned about that.#if you've ever given money to someone in a tough spot who is also maybe dealing with some untreated mental shit#and maybe it's like a bigger bill than usual and like maybe it's an older lady and she holds your hand and emotionally#tells you about her ex husband and her kids and life for 17 minutes and she just is telling you everything bc you're there#THAT'S ME. i'm that woman on the street who's just telling anyone who will listen. bc it doesn't matter#me and her are the same person i just have a house to live in and a safe place to get plastered#and thank god i don't have any kids#hey i know you're on this bridge about to jump but i don't want to overstep by talking to you#very silly. very silly thing to worry about#sergle.txt
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ft. @lia-lozano & @hollyparkcr
#inspo.#ft. lia lozano#ft. holly parker#friends who tub together stay together~#bc what are boundaries? they don't know her
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When ppl say they struggle with people pleasing (esp when the ppl around them would NOT agree) what I hear is "I have ignored my personal limits for years and let my boundaries erode and now every little thing that's asked of me feels like too much because my nervous system is fried and I have to rebuild trust within myself"
This is absolutely not meant as an insult, it's just a pattern I've seen, esp in people with autism maybe? Because you might have unconventional limits or lower limits compared to others and you try to mask those needs
I feel like ppl joke abt it, "oh when someone says they struggle with people pleasing but have never pleased a person in their life", but... Yeah idk I think more often than not it's this right here. There's probably exceptions, but still.
#A friend has a fight w a friend of hers#Bc all of a sudden she doesn't seem reliable anymore and she said she thinks she's highly sensitive and struggles with people pleasing#And i only know this girl a little#But it breaks my heart bc to me it's so obvious she just has highly masked autism and hasn't ever set a boundary#Which just leads to ur nervous system getting all kinds of fucked up and before u know it u can't handle shit anymore#And no one can rely on you and the smallest things feel like the biggest ask#And god it breaks my heart bc i see how she's letting our mutual friend down#BUT I SEE SO CLEARLY WHAT'S HAPPENING and it doesn't feel like it's my place to say smth#Like hey girl I think ur autistic and need to work on regulating ur nervous system and... Start at square one tbh#Like ive been there and I've seen other autistic girls be in that position#It's hard. It's genuinely so fucking hard and i wanna help her but. Idk how without sounding fucking wild bc again:#I don't actually know her that well. We just follow class together#But it's so so so obvious to me bc it's such an obvious pattern once you've seen it a couple times#:((#Should I talk to her? Or maybe talk to our mutual friend.. Idm#Idk*
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me trying to tell myself i'm giving as much as i possibly can

#i don't believe her!!!#i don't know how to set boundaries bc i never know what i want but im learnding#but i have so much guilt it makes me want to freeze and turn off all communication/media but i won't do that anymore bc it's not cool#to me or my friends who i love very deeply <3 but i'm learning to be with myself and i need time bc i have found out almost all of my#interactions/relations have been infected with my trauma response bs!!! which is so insane but it's true and it's no ones fault but i gotta#figure it out ! so i can be a better friend by being ME and not being an extension of whoever im with#pls be patient with me friends i adore u i just cant do it all so fast anymore.
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Some of the most important parts for me:
“Friendships are built of repeated low-stakes interactions and returned bids for attention with slowly increasing intimacy over time.”
"Deeper friendships are formed with people from those kinds of groups when you do things with them outside of the context of the original interaction."
"Smalltalk is a social script of exchanging trivial conversation about non-personal topics in order to pass a brief period of time together.
This sort of conversation is about figuring out whether you want to get to know each other better, so it's kind of a behavioral test. It's assessing "can I have a pleasant, brief conversation with this person?" because people usually want to know if the answer to that question is "yes" before they share more details of their lives."
"If the person speaking responds to your sharing of personal information with a request for more information (asks about your sister) or by sharing some of their somewhat more personal information (roses are blooming) they might be interested in continuing to gradually share more information. If they respond with more smalltalk, they probably aren't interested in becoming closer friends ... [but] maybe at some point they'll share something with you and it'll be your turn to decide if you want to get to know them better."
"Once you've seen someone several times, you will begin to know little things about them. ... If you want to become friends with them, ask them about these things and offer information in return. Start casually and don't pry for more information, and be sure to share about yourself as well. Eventually you will get to the point that you can have a comfortable conversation on topics of shared interest for at least a few minutes."
"If they agree to meeting up for the thing, they are interested in continuing to develop the friendship. If they don't want to meet up then continue at the same level of interaction as before and perhaps later on down they line they'll ask you if you want to plan a meetup."
"Once you have hung out on purpose a few more times you've got two choices: set a regular meetup, or hang out elsewhere. Setting up a regular meetup is the relatively casual option here; it keeps things in the same location and keeps the context of the friendship the same while still increasing interactions and intensifying the relationship. You can have perfectly good, if somewhat casual friends, who you see regularly in one place and rarely outside of that place."
"Hanging out in a new place changes the context of the relationship; suggest a hangout in a place that makes sense for the mutual interests you've learned over the previous months of getting to know the person."
"If you’re talking about the weather as in the first example, but you mention where you grew up and what the weather was like, that can be inspiration for the other person to also talk about where they’re from! But, unlike with a question, if they don’t want to share that information they can usually dodge it without having to make it extremely obvious that that’s what they’re doing."
Wait, so you said that you can learn to trust others by building friendships, but how does one go about doing that? Wouldn't someone I don't know be creeped out or annoyed if I suddenly walked up and started talking to them?
Friendships are built of repeated low-stakes interactions and returned bids for attention with slowly increasing intimacy over time.
It takes a long time to make friends as an adult. People will probably think you're weird if you just walk up and start talking to them as though you are already their friend (people think it's weird when I do this, I try not to do this) but people won't think it's weird if you're someone they've seen a few times who says "hey" and then gradually has more conversations (consisting of more words) with them.
I cheat at forming adult friendships by joining groups where people meet regularly. If you're part of a radio club that meets once a week and you just join up to talk about radios, eventually those will be your radio friends.
If there's a hiking meetup near you and you go regularly, you will eventually have hiking friends.
Deeper friendships are formed with people from those kinds of groups when you do things with them outside of the context of the original interaction; if you go camping with your radio friend, that person is probably more friend than acquaintance. If you go to the movies with a hiking friend who likes the same horror movies as you do, that is deepening the friendship.
In, like 2011 Large Bastard decided he wanted more friends to do stuff with so he started a local radio meetup. These people started as strangers who shared an interest. Now they are people who give each other rides after surgery and help each other move and have started businesses together and have gone on many radio-based camping trips and have worked on each other's cars.
Finding a meetup or starting a meetup is genuinely the cheat-code for making friends.
This is also how making friendships at schools works - you're around a group of people very regularly and eventually you get to know them better and you start figuring out who you get along with and you start spending more time with those people.
If you want to do this in the most fast and dramatic way possible, join a band.
In 2020 I wrote something of a primer on how to turn low-stakes interactions with neighbors and acquaintances into more meaningful relationships; check the notes of this post over the next couple days, I'll dig up the link and share it in a reblog.
#this is legit the best advice i've ever seen for making friends#i can just SEE my problems in (particularly irl) friendship making now#combo of avoiding going beyond polite small talk my end out of Fear and Shame and not doing outside-of-context meetups bc Covid and Fear 2#i'm Very good at asking questions and inviting people to talk about themselves in a way that people clearly enjoy#but then it comes to them asking / me sharing and I shy away#which leads to me making a lot of “friends” who are quite self-centred and don't care to ask questions about me or stop dominating a convo#and other ND people who struggle with this stuff and actually enjoy/haven't been shamed out of infodumping#probably bc i (at least initially) feel more comfortable in those situations#but the ones who are naturally better at respecting my boundaries / are better at receptive conversation probably notice the shying away &#which is a P r o b l e m when either they're the self-centred kind or they're kind and just ND and i don't know how to change the balance -#- of the interactions once i'm more comfortable#<_>#i also struggle with not lying in the light conversation bc i know my truthful answers are not light and bubbly and easy#i don't mean 'how are you' 'not ok' i mean like 'what do you do for work' 'i work for my mother in her business' 'what's that like' 'awful'#😂#& i get all fight/flight when asked these questions that i immediately get flustered/scared and trip over my answers and EXTRA lie#how 2 balance between truth and scare off people - lie and make false friends#also the difference between direct cues and indirect cues is AMAZING to read about thank u so much#this whole post puts words and language to things I've felt and known without a language for them this whole time#guess i'm learning suddenly why people tend to find me very likeable but then I don't make actual friends lmao. and also why self-centred -#- people go NUCLEAR when I get fed up with being their perfect audience/moodboard & start putting boundaries in place. bc i've been sO gOod#this also rly helps explain to me why some ND people seem to go dead silent when I do an indirect cue rather than share Their thing about i#also the idea that this post is full of ableism is the most batshit thing known to man#THIS IS LITERALLY A GUIDE FOR DISABLED PEOPLE#resources
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Dont text your ex don't text your ex dont text your ex don't text your-
#mantras for living well ahahaha#Listen. I don't want to get back with her.#I was a deeply closeted gay trans man dating a lesbian woman (among other incompatibilities). It was never going to work out long.#We tried being friends. We agreed it would be best if we didn't talk to each other again.#I don't want to cross that boundary.#I just get worried bc she has severe mental health issues and she hasn't posted on any social media in 2 years#Which. Now that Im actually writing it down and thinking about it is really unfair of me#I've deleted most social media apps from my phone in that same time. No announcement just. No more posting.#it's probably better that I don't know how she's doing. What with how I make everything my fault.#Sigh
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designs for a zine piece! enjoy some background story my illustration never needed under the read more (fair warning I did NOT edit this at all):
newbie mage apprentices Sam and Tucker who became friends bc they're kinda… the ones at the bottom of their class and struggle the most, for different reasons. they become besties over time and practice together!
except one night, something goes terribly wrong. they spent the last few nights preparing for a project, a bigger spell that needs an intricate circle with precise measurements to work. but when they try to activate it, well…
oops. they summoned a demon.
which is, for one, extremely illegal. only certified demonologists are allowed to summon demons because they're so dangerous. anything less than a perfect binding circle and thoroughly researched info on the demon, including their true name, is even remotely safe.
but, weirdly enough… the demon seems just as surprised as they are. as Sam and Tuck frantically try to figure out how to dispel the demon, they realize–oh god, did their circle actually sufficiently bind the demon? it can't leave. they watch the demon tentatively poke it's claws into the air around the boundary, and watch it fizzle, retreating back with a strained hiss.
okay. okay, they can do this. without death looming over their heads, they can figure out how to send the demon back. it's cool, it's fine. except while they leaf through their books, they notice the demon watching them. it looks kind of… curious. timid. interested in what they're doing. it catches them noticing his staring, and it. apologizes? it seems flustered?
weird, okay. they keep looking, and the demon starts talking. at first, little comments to itself. mumbles that soon get just loud enough to hear. little “ooh, is that a telescope?" and “is that what fire looks like up here?" and “that must be for making charcoal…”
Sam is the one brave enough to be like "are all demons as chatty as you??” and the demon gets flustered again, apologizing. says he's just never been topside before, he's only read about humans in tomes. oh wow is that the moon outside? it really IS blue up here! is it always blue? what are you doing up? I thought humans slept at night?
Sam and Tuck can't help getting pulled in with the demon's genuine curiosity. they're wary though, since they know demons can be clever, conniving. there's a number of ways a demon can get the upper hand on a summoner who has them bound. if he gets their full names, gets them to smudge and break the circle… there could also be ways they aren't aware of. so they consider their words carefully, but engage in some chatter while they research.
it's almost morning by the time they find a way to send the demon back–but as they prepare the spell, the demon says WAIT WAIT and they stop, uncertain. the demon starts stammering out how this is weird but like… he really had fun tonight. he doesn't get to just hang out much, especially with anyone his age.
Tuck is like “how do you know our ages??" and the demon points out "oh, you said something about Paulie’s 18th birthday party, so I thought…” and they're both like oh shit we didn't even notice we did that?
“Paulina" Sam corrects in her dumbfounded stupor.
“Right, Paulina!" the demon snaps his fingers, but quickly loses his confidence when Sam and Tuck continue to stare at him like they're not sure what's going on. he coughs and fidgets and says “um, well, I was just wondering, I guess… if you wanted to summon me another time, I wouldn't mind. you see those circles there? yeah, that's what summoned me. the candles helped too I think. oh, it doesn't need all those runes though, probably don't want to redraw all those.”
Sam and Tuck are practically gawking, but… for some reason, this demon looks so sincere. so much like them, awkward and lonely and genuinely curious.
it's a bad idea. a terrible one, even. the demon probably noticed they're newbies and not demonologists. it could be hoping they make an error in their circle, or mess up a candle, or reveal their names on accident.
But, well. They're stupid. they're also eager for anything to help them in school, and too empathetic for their own good. they send the demon off with a yeah, no. they then think about it for a week, and end up summoning the demon against their better judgment.
the demon is shocked and so happy, they can't help but be a little endeared. they lay down some ground rules, take care to be as safe as possible… and soon, this demon that introduces himself as “Phantom" becomes a nightly visitor. they talk about their worlds, find out they share a lot of common interests, and help each other in their studies. which, hello, demons also study? bro are you serious??
they play games, laugh till their ribs hurt, and open up to each other on a far deeper level than anyone expected. over time, Phantom becomes a true friend.
Sam and Tuck quietly begin to lament the fact Phantom is stuck in that damn circle. they want to take him places, let him see the human world he seems so interested in. they want to paint his stupid claws and noogie him between his dumb horns and hug him.
but it's an astronomical risk. it's legal for a demonologist with a proper permit, but it's still considered a grave taboo to grant access to a demon outside a circle. there's just too much at risk. demons can be dangerous enough to lay waste to entire towns, take multiple teams of military-rank mages to take down.
they wouldn't risk it… if they hadn't snuck into the library’s restricted section and copy a page from a demonologist book that gives them good framework for a contract. they make some edits to it though, giving Phantom at least a little wiggle room to protect himself if need be. and allow him use of transformation magic so he can hide somehow. but they spend weeks making sure they have airtight wording to ensure Phantom can't cause anyone or anything any substantial harm.
when they finally bring the contract to Phantom, he's stunned. he cries. nothing needs to be said, they all know the gravity of their proposal. even if they ask for proof of Phantom's trust in turn, first. they ask for his full name, so they can bind him. just temporarily. but in that moment, they'll have full control over him. they could instead tell Phantom to serve them, force him to obey their every order. even if it's just for a moment, giving them his full name with the proper circle and incantation, is putting his life in their hands.
Phantom, with tears still in his eyes, smiles warmly and nods. with only a breath to steel himself, he gives them his full name. Daniel James Fenton.
magic sparks in the circle, and Sam and Tuck finish the incantation. ethereal chains sprout up to wrap around Phantom's arms and legs, which makes him jump–but the unwavering trust in his eyes makes the two humans choke up.
they release the binding. all that's left is to break the containment barrier in the circle, so Phantom can walk free.
“Uh, about that…” Phantom laughs sheepishly… then proceeds to step outside of the circle, merely wincing when the barrier zaps around him.
Sam and Tucker gawk. Phantom scratches his neck. “Y-yeah, so… your barrier circle was already broken that first night. It's, uh… right over there. You missed a spot.”
abject horror overcomes them because this entire time Phantom's been visiting, he could have broken out? EASILY?? THEY WOULD HAVE BEEN DEAD.
Tucker falls to his knees, but soon starts to laugh. it's kind of hysterical at first but slowly, he and Sam are genuinely laughing. they're so STUPID, and Phantom is the most un-demonlike demon they've ever HEARD of. Phantom is still flustered, stammering out apologies because he wasn't trying to deceive them or anything! he just didn't want to scare them! without a proper containment circle they technically couldn't send him back either, so he just… went back using his own magic each time they “dispelled" him.
once they've calmed down, Phantom morphs his body into a human form–which shock Sam and Tuck, because uh, only elite demons are capable of that. they were expecting an animal, or straight up going invisible. Phantom laughs it off, says he just, spent a lot of time practicing bc he's so interested in the human world (not a lie, but). he proceeds to adopt the nickname Danny, and they all have FUN WONDERFUL SHENANIGANS
(and sometime in the near future, when faced with something truly threatening he needs to protect them from, Danny reveals that. well. their contract also had some holes in it. and he's had access to his full demon power this whole time. whoopsie! it's a good thing he genuinely loves them and doesn't want to hurt anyone, or their asses would be SO dead lol)
they're about as normal about his full demon form as you'd expect from me btw:

#danny phantom#dp demon au#everlasting trio#when is it not lmao#zilly art#Tucker: oh I am SO climbing that#Tucker: no I'm serious get me a grappling hook
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Reason #345734 why I don't tell my mom shit.
Her pain and suffering is the only kind she cares about, and she'll play stupid games with me like ghost me for 3+ weeks after a minor surgery, just to make sure I'm worried enough about her life to check, so she "has permission" to start in with the talking my ear off about her problems without boundaries or preamble. She won't know shit about my issues til after they're over (if she hears about them at all) bc she never asks a damn thing about my life, and literally only ever leaves room for herself and her feelings in any equation literally ever and then peaces tf out like. Bitch I'm permanently disabled and in a degenerative spiral that's gonna last my whole fkn life, and you're still bitching about yourself? Wanting me to cater to your emotions when you haven't even spared a CRUMB of consideration in return?
FUck all the way off.
Should have known that if she had died or sth bad happened, I'd have heard something right away. After 30+ yrs of her pulling the "yeah my kid tried to kill themself for the 7th time, but have you asked ME how hard it is to raise them doing the nothing I have been, bc I still don't know them as a person at all or even try to? Where's the compassion?!" shit... you'd think I would know better, but my compassion gets me fucked over YET AGAIN.
If she's being flighty, she's being petty. If she's being flighty, she's being petty. If she's being flighty, she's being petty. If she's being flighty, she's being petty. If she's being flighty, she's being petty. If she's being flighty, she's being petty. If she's being flighty, she's being petty. If she's being flighty, she's being petty. If she's being flighty, she's being petty. If she's being flighty, she's being petty. If she's being flighty, she's being petty. If she's being flighty, she's being petty. If she's being flighty, she's being petty.
Back to no contact.
Let the bitch suffocate if she can't self soothe.
#idk how many chances she's gonna get in this life and she's still playing stupid games with my fkn emotions and banking stupid ass prizes#frfrfr every “nice” thing she does is usually laced with something she knows damn well I hate so she can use my reactions against me bc#she just wants to have a nice peaceful time throwing me a bday party i didnt want with cake i don't like and getting butthurt when i don't#lie to her face and spare her feelings and literally replace my own boundaries with hers instead#wonder where I got the minimization of my own problems from hhhhhhh bitingbitingbiting#this shit is why it took over a decade to even get the autoimmune diagnoses i needed to understand why i was infirmed half my fkn life but#noooo she's gotta make everything about her#i never get a “hi how are you” just months of no contact followed by all her drama in a full discography without even checking to make sure#i'm in a space to be carrying all that shit#which as a chronically ill and fatigued person it's just courteous to ask before you dump shit on them if you know they're gonna be tired?#it costs zero dollars to check on someone before you dump every article of your dirty laundry on them and throw a pity party without consen#i can also be guilty of venting too but ffs at least i check in on my vent friends if i go too hard and try and keep shit stirring to a min#nvm the last time i told her anything it was to say i got those diagnoses and actually have medical reasons for my permanent exhaustion#and she turned it into a fkn competition!!!!!!!!!!#this bitch only cares about herself it literally doesn't matter if she's well or sick it's all about her and what she wants out of it#never once did i get anything to the degree of 'what would you like to happen/where are your boundaries here' bc she doesn't fkn care#so i am done giving her the grace she doesn't need and hasn't yet earned back bc i'm not putting her needs before mine again fuck that#fffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffuck this shit i'm out~#vent rant#pls ignore
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Laios x Beastkin!Reader
an. Senshi, Chilchuck, and Marcille x Reader are mentioned quiiiite a bit in here. Izutsumi x reader is more sparse. split between furry/scaly/feathery beastkin after the more general ones in the beginning. SORRY if the formatting is weird I got "text limited" a lot on this lmfao
this is a lot so. <3 show sum luv
general sfw
when you two first meet...bro is ELATED. He knows Izutsumi, which is fine, but you're an entirely different one. Who also doesn't seem to be super against him getting to know them
He asks SO many questions. What are you mixed with? Are you naturally born or artificial? What's it like having wings? A tail?
He's testing out all your features. He loves them so much.
When there's downtime, he likes to conduct "research". This goes for analyzing your features and making notes, comparing them to his books and other notes, and even more intricate tests like reaction time and stuff.
He'll hold a candle/torch by your face and test your pupil dilation. It's oddly intimate because he's just staring you down and its like. okay. are we gonna kiss orrrr
Loves. Loves. Loves just WATCHING you. Seeing the way you pounce on little bugs for fun or get spooked by certain noises. He just smiles and is all amused.
You'll catch him doodling you pretty often. He makes notes like "y/n caught a treasure bug today. They seem pretty skilled at hunting. Failed to kill it for some reason...just played with it until it scurried off." The doodles are like...surprisingly pretty decent. The monster portions of you are the best looking and most detailed. But it's so cool to see just how much he pays attention to you and your idiosyncrasies.
Your interactions with Izutsumi also interest him. Do you guys get along? Are you prey to her? Or is she to you? If you and Izu are talking or around each other he's watching like a hawk out of pure curiosity.
However...there's a particular page in his journal where he's providing feedback on how he would make you "better" aka cooler. It's basically just his own ramblings. No Laios, an extra set of eyes and the ability to breath fire and ice and everything in between is not. better. you're just salivating over the idea of your monster OC
If you bring this up to him he actually agrees. After a lot of note taking and observation he's really fascinated just on how well suited your entire existence is to...surviving. He has a lot of theories he'd love to share about you.
But he has e x t e n s i v e notes on your body. It's something that fr makes you blush because, why is he theorizing about the base of your tail and how it connects to your spine? and the number of nipples you have? wait...how is his guess right...?
But Laios is so useful. You might as well call him your owner. You don't have to lift a finger when it comes to taking care of yourself. (He misses his dogs so you fill in.)
He takes care of your skin/fur/scales/feathers, cuts your claws, helps you file down your hooves or horns. He's very into taking care of you if you'll let him. (Marcille also hops in on this since its her love language LOL. When she's not busy with Izutsumi she helps when she can.)
If you are like...afraid of water or don't enjoy bathing. You are like the party's pet. They're debating on how to get you clean before Chilchuck is like "if you don't take a bath I am going to kill you and throw you in there myself." Laios then goes all puppy dog eyed bc he thinks Chil is being to hard on you and then he sighs and is like "fine. I'll buy you a treat when we get back to the surface."
Marcille/Laios are really good when it comes to bath time. They aren't weird about it (Laios is checking you out but. In a curious type of way. Marcille is giving him side eye if hes getting too...Laiosy. But he respects your boundaries. Just imagine Laios happily scrubbing you while humming a tune awe.)
And when it comes to sleeping arrangements...you can alternate between anyone in the party. But Laios and Chilchuck are your best bets. Marcille is an excellent sleeping partner if the dreams don't bother you, shes soo happy to have you sleep with her and she's soft and smells nice.
Laios happily lets you sleep with him. He's actually not super cuddly (unless you are he'll reciprocate). But he is very much like, giving you a ton of space. If you fall asleep before him he just relents and sleeps as comfortably as he can around you lol. Literally just like any other pet owner.
Chilchuck....sleeping with him is difficult bc Izutsumi will fight you on it, but she relents if you can fit in without much issue (bonus points if you're warm) so. You guys can both overheat this poor man. Izu may even start cuddling with you more. She finds a lot of comfort in having another beastkin in the party even though she won't say it.
And speaking of Chilchuck...you're likely a bit more cooperative than Izutsumi, so he gets your help when it comes to checking for traps and finding treasure. With your elite hearing and other abilities, he's actually really pleasantly surprised how useful you are. (If you were a half-foot he'd definitely want you in his guild). He gives you pets and treats when the others aren't really paying attention (He doesn't want them to see him doting on you is all LOL).
Okay. So. Your diet. This is an anime about eating so. Let's get down to it.
Whether you're a herbivore, carnivore, or omnivore--Laios is ENSURING your needs are taken care of in the party. It is of upmost importance to him.
He takes notes and asks about how certain foods make you feel. Are you more energized? Less energized? Stomach hurting? Pooping well? (Will ask this with upmost sincerity, he wants to make sure the butter/milk/etc used in their cooking isn't interfering with your tummy. Whether you want to answer this is up to you lol).
Laios and Senshi happily adjust things to your needs. Laios will spend time foraging with you, Senshi will find certain monsters with more nutrients that meet your needs. Senshi is also like, really knowledgeable about nutrients, so sometimes in your food he may grind up shells or bones to meet calcium needs and such. When he cooks he'll give you bones or soften them up in water so you can eat the marrow. :-)
Senshi...is the coolest though. He also lets you perch on him (like Izutsumi) and since he's lived in the dungeon for so long, he knows a lot about monsters firsthand. If it applies, he'll give you tips about yourself or some monsters you should prey on. Senshi and you go on little foraging trips too. He'll have you sniff things out in return for extra food during dinner.
Laios likes to see you hunt prey and eat it raw, though. Everyone else would rather not and it makes them sick but he thinks it is SO cool. He honestly wishes he could do that. He takes hunting lessons from you and will give you tips on being stealthier and such.
Your teeth really fascinate him. He likes testing your bite strength on different types of material (Like wood, stone, bones, etc.). He'll stick his fingers in your mouth and admire them if youd let him. He gives you so much praise in general its so cute.
AND. PETTING YOU. He is so tactile if you let him (i mean look how much he tries and fails to pet izutsumi). When you give him the all clear he is like. jumping for joy. he LOVES to pet you and praise you. He absentmindedly pets you when hes sitting down or standing by you. And when you nuzzle into his touch his heart SOARS. You can see on his face he's blushing and has that like. excited wiggly smile <3
I think when he's just sitting around he just messes with your tail. He likes it.
Lay down beside him and he will happily pet you and be like "do you like this? Is this a good spot?" Present. Your belly to him. and he is over the moon. He pets you wildly and is like "Who's a good boy/girl/monster?" He is so unashamed about doing this too. Chilchuck would put a stop to it if you didn't like it so much.
If you give him kisses or tongue bath's he's eating that shit up (i mean. look at those extra comics w him and dogs he lets dogs just kiss all over his face omfg). He isn't a huge fan of getting his hair wet (sensory issue) but when it's your drool...he can't help but be excited. Laios is all like "they're grooming me?? this means they like me, right??? Can I officially say I befriended a monster???"
It's proof that you care for him and view him as apart of your pack...he is just over the moon at this.
I will say...Laios is way too "has no backbone with you" for a while. You're chewing shoes? You can't help it! Stealing snacks? It's instinctual! Playing too rough with Izutsumi? C'mon guys...
But when he notices his party actually getting upset. You will be surprised how he can put his foot down. Not even max puppy eyes work on him. He will leash and muzzle you if needed.
But you can always get away with messing with his stuff. He thinks its fun to chase you around when you got his shirt in his maw. Then he happily wears the torn up gear and Marcille is like "let me sew it..."
For Scaly Beastkin:
He's so helpful when it comes to shedding season. Laios finds nice rocks all the time and helps scrape off any patches that are drying and crusting and hes not even phased and doesn't think its gross at all. He would keep some skin to test its resilience if you let him.
And going with that, when you need to shed and soak he would help you find a place and will happily assist with the shedding. He's so excited to be there honestly. But he feels bad you are uncomfortable so he lets you cuddle up under the water with him while you wait for your shed to soften up <3
Laios runs his fingers over your scales absentmindedly...just loves feeling how smooth they are, especially after he spent so much time helping them maintain that pristine smoothness.
He gets Marcille's help to make a moisturizing ointment to put on you every now and then so you don't get to dried out in the dungeon!! Marcille starts to fret about that too. You're just kinda chillin and she'll reach over and put ointment on your hands/cheeks/tail. Just areas you may be susceptible to drying out.
Also...he lets you use him as a heating rock. Sunshine is really limited in the dungeon, so...when you need a warm up he's there and waiting and extremely excited to warm you up with a hug.
For Furry Beastkin:
Brushes you. He'd do this EVERY evening (and morning) if you let him. He takes notes, too. Do you have an undercoat? Or is it just one? What does this mean about what environment you originated from?
He probably tries to use your shed fur to embellish his own clothes or put in his pillow/blankets. Reduce, Reuse, Recycle I guess?
And to add to that...remember how Marcille made a cute little cat head from Izutsumi's fur? He does that too. He and Marcille make cute little shapes outta your shed and giggle together about it.
If you get fleas...he is the party member you should tell. He'll help you get rid of them and won't rat you out to the other members LOL. He'd probably blame himself if it spread and the rest of the party is like "you expect us to beleive. you got fleas. Laios you would be excited if you got them."
For Feathered Beastkin:
Preening....<3. When you have pin feathers he is so sweet and gentle. gently picks them out. It kinda tickles bc he's just gliding his fingers over your wings. You'll catch him sighing in content and burying his face in the softness. It's so sweet.
He collects your feathers and shows them off to Marcille (who also really likes them.) Your down is SO useful too. The party has the softest blankets and pillows thanks to you. When you're molting everyone is calling dibs on the feathers to stuff in their bedding.
Laios examines your wingspan and is really interested on stuff like weather you can fly or not. If you can, he's in awe. He wants to see it. Maybe even fly with you if he can. Its always been a dream of his to do that.
nsfw
tw (for nsfw). monsterfucking? if that counts. mentions of vent/cloaca/knot
This man. It is so easy to tell overtime just how fucking horny he gets over monster stuff. He is addicted to just how much you differ from him. Your scales, fur, feathers, wings, etc....he thinks they're all extremely sexy.
He just loves the primal aspect of it? Like you act on instinct. Do what makes you happy. Like of course you have human reasoning and such but STILL. You're so non human and otherworldly it makes his stomach knot up and his dick hard as a rock. He wants to know EVERYTHING about you.
If you have a heat/rut cycle...he is. fucking. begging you come to him for help. jfc you don't even have to let him stick his dick in you. He just slowly probes your hole with his fingers and legit GASPS when he feels it clench around him. Not only is he learning so much about you and monster anatomy but hes also having his monster fucking dreams come true.
I mean it is a given with Laios but his fucking face is always in your hole. He loves eating pussy/ass so fucking much. And having your dick, clit, or knot down his throat drives him wild. He eats your slick and cum like he's starving. He's so sloppy with it too--there's spit and slick and cum all over his face and he's just slurping it all up like its his last meal.
He definitely "examines" you. He'll stick his fingers in you and stretch out your hole just to get a better look at what's inside. (imagine his thumbs sliding in and prying you open.) The muscles pulsating and the color and the smell...god he's drooling. You feel all vulnerable and exposed but he's just constantly praising how amazing your body and its functions are.
He busts so quick with a beastkin it....wow. Like. You are seriously all he has ever dreamed of and shit. I can't imagine he'd be able to contain himself. He cums and just still wants more, he fucks you through the overstimulation until he cries
Oh he wants to know whats in your pants so bad its ridiculous. Like. I cannot explain just how much he is vibrating with excitement
If you have a cloaca...he's very gentle with your hole at first. You explain to him what to look for, what feels good. He'll gently explore with his fingers until he finds the right hole and then he's going at it. He's shoving his tongue in there happily too. He knows what a cloaca is. He knows it's a singular vent for waste and sexual functions. Doesn't matter. His tongue is going in there. Laios is beyond excited to taste everything and see what makes you squirm.
If you have a knot...it's a given he wants you to knot him. It takes him a few tries (he can't take your knot at first because he's too tight) but when he finally is able to its like. euphoric for him. He loves feeling your warm cum in his ass and your desperate pants against his throat as your overstimulated self gets adjusted to being stuck to him. Gods.
Plus...I've discussed this on my blog in more detail but with a beastkin reader he's definitely into
You biting/scratching him up. He lovvveess being marked. Use him as a chew toy PLEASE
Predator/Prey rp: He's a trained hunter but he wouldn't mind being hunted...He loves how strong you are and how you can turn the tables on him if you wanted.
Just?? You being feral?? He likes it when you act more like your monster side and just treat him like a toy.
Breeding Kink: Even if you aren't able to get pregnant or breed (either due to sex or incompatible genetics due to being part monster), he's still really into it. You can fill him up vice versa...He loves the feeling of having you last inside him and he loves knowing you're still filled up from him. Plus, it adds to the more animalistic part of sex which is what he likes
#laios touden#laios x reader#dungeon meshi#dungeon meshi x reader#delicious in dungeon#reader insert#marcille x reader#senshi x reader#chilchuck x reader
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I Know What You Want ft. Wonyoung
premise: Inspired by those "your birth month is your ex gf and your current gf" slideshows on tiktok. Might do more of these because they are light and fun.


pairing: Wonyoung x Male Reader content warning/kinks: cheating, daddy kink, anal a/n: happy sunday, always lube up properly o7 audio version (note: audio version is without daddy kink bc i got too lazy to edit around it) wc: 2.4k
"Isn't she a little old for you?" Wonyoung asked, a hint of annoyance in her tone.
"You sound jealous."
She shrugged. "I'm not jealous. I just didn't realize Sunmi-sunbaenim was into robbing the cradle."
"I'm twenty-one," you pointed out. Surely grown enough to make your own decisions on who you dated.
"She's thirty-two," Wonyoung countered.
You let out an annoyed sigh, "I'm not doing this with you today, Wonyoung. Why did you want to meet?"
Wonyoung bristled at your directness, her posture straightening as she scoffed. "You start fucking some hag and you start acting brand new around me."
"Some hag? Really? Wasn't it you who kept saying how much you adored Sunmi-sunbaenim?"
"That was before she took what was mine."
You let out a bark of dry laughter. "I'm not yours. I don't belong to you, Wonyoung."
A healthy response would have been to accept the setting of boundaries and acknowledge their mistake. Which naturally meant that Wonyoung took your words as a challenge.
"Is that right?" she asked, taking a step towards you. "You belong to her now, huh?"
"That's right." Which wasn't exactly true. You didn't think you belonged to anyone but something about the entitlement she was acting with made you respond out of indignation.
What you didn't expect was for her hand to reach out, manicured fingers sliding down to grasp your crotch. "Then why do I still get you hard?"
"Wonyoung -- "
A thin eyebrow arched itself, the picture of arrogance. "Are you going to deny it?"
"Your delusional."
"Am I?" She began to massage your cock over your clothing, and despite your protest, your cock was all too eager to respond to her familiar touch. "Are you telling me if I bent over right now you wouldn't fuck me against this wall?"
God you hated her. Or at least you should. The reality was that despite your separation. Despite the toxicity that had existed in your relationship. Despite being in a happy relationship now. There would always be a part of you that was weak to her. To both her advances and her behavior.
As if sensing your wavering disposition, her touch became heavier. "I'm not wearing any panties under this skirt," she said her tone taking on an innocent air. "Just the way Daddy likes."
That was all it took.
It was pathetically easy in the end for Wonyoung to get you to snap. Though, if anyone was going to be capable of it, it was going to be her. She knew you too well, for better and for worse. In fact, you wouldn't be surprised if her whole look today; the mid-thigh length skirt, the cropped blouse that was a size too small and hugged her frame as a result. She even let her hair down today so it'd be easy for you to grab it. Combine that with her lack of underwear and calling you daddy and, well, you never stood a chance.
You surged forward, gripping Wonyoung's shoulders and spinning her to face the wall. She lead out a delighted fit of laughter as she arched her back, pressing her ass against your groin. Your hands moved to your buckle, shoving down your pants to free your cock from its denim cage.
"I can't stand you, you know that?"
Wonyoung giggled as she tossed you a look over her shoulder, "Whatever you say, Daddy."
With cock in hand you used the other to shove her skirt up, revealing that she had spoken true in her words. You could see her bare pussy, practically begging for you. You bit your bottom lip, hating that the thought of missing this crossed your mind. "You were waiting for this weren't you?"
"Can you tell?" Wonyoung smiled wickedly, "Can't you see how wet I am for you?"
You could. And if you needed any further confirmation you ran your cock between her legs, coating it in her arousal. You had to stop yourself from delving into any further foreplay. This was just a one-time fuck to get it out of your system. At least that was what you told yourself. But as you slipped the tip of your cock into her and began to thrust forward, you were reminded of why it had been so hard to quit Wonyoung in the first place.
"Oh fuck yes, Daddy," Wonyoung said, her back arching further. "You feel how you're stretching my tight pussy? You haven't felt that in a while have you?"
You bit back the urge to tell Wonyoung that wasn't how that worked. Now wasn't the time for a biology lesson nor defending your girlfriend's honor. Instead you focused on stuffing her inch by inch, watching as her pussy swallowed more and more of you until you were pressed flush against her ass.
"Oh, fuck," you groaned out, your head falling forward slightly.
"It feels good doesn't it? It's perfect," Wonyoung cooed. "We're perfect."
Your brow furrowed slightly. "Don't think I'm won over that easily."
Refusing to give into the sentiment that she was suggesting you slipped your cock out of her before stuffing her again and again. You repeated the process, each time going a bit hard, a bit faster while making sure she felt every inch of your cock. The truth was it was fucking heavenly. Sex had never been the reason your relationship fell apart. And even now months later it was like returning to something familiar. Despite yourself you wanted to enjoy this, for however long it lasted.
Your fingers moved to tangle in her dark, wavy locks, pulling her head back as her lithe body shook with your rough thrusts.
"You like that, Wony? This is what you wanted right?" You taunted, giving into the moment as you seized back control.
"Yes!"
"You couldn't find anyone else to fuck you this good could you?"
"Noo," she moaned.
You tugged on her hair roughly, "No, what?"
"No one fucks me this good, Daddy!" Wonyoung cried out.
You rewarded her diligent response with a spank on her fit ass.
"Mmmfph!" She moaned, biting her bottom lip as you continued to fuck her roughly. You could feel her walls tightening around you, her juices already dripping around your cock each time you pulled out of her. The telltale signs that her first orgasm was on the horizon were there for you to see. The way her cheeks flushed, the way her mouth hung upon as she did her best to hold herself against the wall. All she needed was for you to push her over the brink.
"Are you going to come for me? Come for daddy," you whispered against her the shell of her ear as you stuffed her.
"F-fuck! I'm coming!" Wonyoung cried out, not even bothering with trying to contain her moans of pleasure. The look on her face was pure ecstasy and you found it was a look that, despite having near memorized it, it was one you missed.
Her walls tightened around your length as her orgasm shook her body. You were relentless, continuing to fuck the top idol through her climax. One arm slipped around her waist should her legs go weak on her. By the time it was all over she had leaned forward, her face pressed against the wall, her eyes slightly glazed over as her body rocked with your slower thrusts.
As you looked at her perfect ass still pointed out to you, an idea popped into your head.
"Don't move" you instructed her, though you weren't sure if she comprehended you.
You slipped your cock out of her, ignoring the lazy "Hey..." That came from Wonyoung at your action. You were still achingly hard and now thoroughly coated in her juices. That would come in handy soon enough. You got down on your knees, spreading her firm cheeks. Her pussy lips were swollen from your rough fucking but that wasn't your target, instead your tongue was probing her asshole, much to Wonyoung's surprise.
"W-what are you doing," she asked, the intrusion bringing her some of her senses back. Still, she made no move to stop you.
Her inaction only emboldened her as your tongue worked her backdoor. In all the months the two of you had spent together. In all the spontaneous sessions that broke out between you whether it was loving or after a fight, this was the one hole that Wonyoung had never let you claim. In fact, she had been adamant about it every time you even mentioned it. But you had a plan for that now. When you were satisfied you withdrew your tongue and moved to test her hole with your index finger.
"Really, what are you up to back there?" Wonyoung said, letting out a shaky breath.
"Ssh, just relax," you instructed her.
"You – fuck – you know that's off-limits," she returned.
Now was your trump card.
"Sunmi let me fuck her ass."
A poignant pause hung in the air. It was as if Wonyoung was considering what you had just said. Though, given her actions thus far, you had a feeling you already knew her mind was made up. Wonyoung wasn't nearly as cut-throat as some made her out to be but she wasn't someone who took kindly to coming in second place. Least of all when it came to you.
"Make sure you don't go to hard" she finally said. "And you better soak your cock, I'm not some stretched out hag."
"Unnecessary," you chided her. Still, she was right on one point. You returned your tongue to her asshole, preparing it the best you could before moving back to your feet. Your cock slipped inside of Wonyoung again, giving her a few rough thrusts before pulling out and applying some more natural lubrication of your own as you spit on your cock. Finally you were ready. Well, as ready as you could be. Mostly your cock was just aching at the thought of finally being inside Wonyoung's ass.
You positioned your tip at her entrance, gently beginning to push the head forward. "Remember to relax," you said, a hand on her lower back.
"Oh, fuck," Wonyoung swore, her cheek pressed against the wall. "You're too fucking big."
"I thought you liked that," you taunted her.
"Shut up," she groaned.
You couldn't help but chuckle. There was the Wonyoung you knew. Not the princess she pretended to be in front of the camera. You continued pushing ahead, slow and steady as the head of your cock finally penetrated her.
"Holy shit..." You muttered under her breath.
"Fuck. Just....wait there a second," Wonyoung muttered, one long arm reaching back to press against your hip as she got accustom to the new stretch.
You were more than happy to abide. Even just having past the head of your cock in her ass had you reeling. You knew that some of your reaction would be based on the novelty of it. On the fact that you were fucking Jang Wonyoung's ass for the first time. That you were the only person to ever do so. But the truth was it also felt far better than you could have imagined. It wasn't your first time. You hadn't lied when you said that Sunmi had taken you first. And, to be fair, you had loved it then too. But it had been different. You had merely experienced it as Sunmi rode you, in control the entire time. On top of that,t here wasn't the same history. As much as you hated to admit it, it didn't compare to this.
"Okay," Wonyoung said, breaking you from your thoughts, "You can move."
That was all you needed to hear. You pushed forward, inch by inch watching as her hole stretched around your cock until you made it about halfway down the length of your shaft.
"This will have to do," you grunted.
You began to move your hips, slowly at first as you rocked against her before adding more vigor. Steadily with drawing your cock before filling her backdoor again and again. Soft pants left Wonyoung as her nails dug into your flesh, her hand holding onto your thigh.
"How does it feel," you asked her.
"Like I'm being split in half," she groaned.
"And?"
Wonyoung was silent for a moment before a breathless, "...so good."
"Yeah?" Your cock twitched inside of her.
She nodded, her eyes closed, "Fuck yes. Fuck, your cock feels so good inside my tight little asshole."
"That's right," you said, picking up the pace. "And no one will make you feel like this."
"It's all yours," Wonyoung moaned. "Always yours, Daddy."
Somewhere along the way you had transitioned to the one who was laying a possessive claim as opposed to Wonyoung. Whatever, you tossed it up to the heat of the moment. This changed nothing but it did motivate you to see this through to the end. After that it'd be like this never happened but until then her ass was yours.
Your grip on her hips tightened as your pace increased, pounding her backdoor. Wonyoung's hand dipped between her thighs, rubbing her clit as she chased her second orgasm.
"Fuck!" She chanted, becoming more vocal as her climax drew near.
"I'm going to come," you grunted. "I'm going to fill you up."
Wonyoung didn't have the capacity to reply, instead her mouth fell open in a silent cry as her second orgasm washed over her. Not one to be a liar you finally managed to fit your entire length into her ass, just in time for your own release to hit you. Your cock swelled before spilling an obscene amount of cum into her bowel. As you pulled your cock out you watched your cum ooze out of her puckered hole.
"Jesus christ..." You muttered, chest heaving. The sight alone was damn near enough to make you want a round two.
For once Wonyoung didn't have a smart comeback, instead slowly sinking to the ground in a heap, her cheek still pressed against the wall as she tried to catch her breath. Idly you couldn't help but wonder if this was how she imagined this encounter was going to go when she first confronted you. Maybe you'd get to ask her once some of her senses returned. For now you just wanted to bask in the pleasure of what had just happened without thinking too hard.
TWO WEEKS LATER.
"Un-fucking-believable."
You stared at your phone, watching as the latest tiktok reel came across your screen. You watched as your girlfriend, Sunmi, and your ex-girlfriend, Wonyoung, completed a dance challenge together. Of course, Sunmi had no idea about your past relationships. Wonyoung on the other hand was well aware.
And yet here she was, doing a dance challenge with the same woman whose boyfriend had been fucking her ass not two weeks earlier.
You could only shake your head in disbelief and some mild concern. "What the hell are you plotting, Wony."
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TEAM BUECKERS

pairing: paige bueckers x fem!reader
content: language, kinda silly, kinda rushed
wc: 5.9k
synopsis: For you and Paige, the line between “friends” and “something more” wasn’t always this blurry. You weren’t quite sure how you got here, and if you were being completely honest, you didn’t know if you were brave enough to ever cross that line fully. It’s not until Paige ropes you into a Valentine’s Day couples contest you realize, with the two of you, that line never really existed at all.
notes: happy (late) valentines day 😋 yes i'm posting this after midnight on february 15 and yes i tried my best to get this out on the 14th when it was, you know, actually valentines day, but i fumbled majorly and im like 50% sorry. not proofread bc im sleepy. i lowkey don't know how to feel about this but i think the end makes up for it but i had an idea for this and it honestly derailed. i still don't know how taglists work (if you've asked and you're not on here, i'm sorry i will just throw up and die if i tag someone who doesn't actually want to be tagged in all of my works i hope u understand, pls be super specific my brain doesn't function like it used to) uhhh so yeah lmk what we think & happy vday 🫶
tags: @jnkbueckers
You and Paige weren’t always like this. There used to be a clear boundary in your friendship, a strictly platonic one where her embrace didn’t make your heart race and where her mischievous smile didn’t fill you with an exasperation that bordered on endearment. You didn’t always wear her jersey at games, didn’t always keep her favorite ice cream stocked in your apartment for nights she came over to binge watch the same show the both of you have probably seen a combined thousand times, didn’t always confuse where you begin or where she ends. There used to be a time where the two of you weren’t so inexplicably intertwined in the fabric of each other’s lives.
If anyone asked, you wouldn’t be able to identify when everything shifted – when your feelings transformed into what they are now. It just happened. The realization was as easy as waking up next to her on the couch, your legs tangled under a blanket far too small for the both of you, her arm tight around your waist to prevent you from falling off of the cushions entirely. It was as easy as the spare toothbrush you keep in your bathroom because she sleeps over so often, as easy as the drawer you have in her room because sometimes her dorm is just closer than your apartment.
So maybe it was kind of inevitable that ‘you and Paige’ turned into a ‘You & Paige.’ The two of you have a simple understanding. You keep her grounded, she encourages you to dream a little bigger. You talk, she listens. You round each other out in so many ways that you’re not the least bit surprised by how many people think that you and Paige are dating. If anything, they’re more surprised when you correct them, saying, “She’s just my best friend.”
You’re content to take your feelings for her to the grave. Maybe you would get over her eventually. She’s Paige Bueckers. She has a national championship and the upcoming draft to focus on and you have your senior thesis due at the end of the semester. The both of you have a lot on your plates – you care for her too much to complicate things for her, even if that means putting your own feelings on the back-burner.
You’re sitting on your couch, twelve pages into your paper, sifting through the twenty-eight (yes, twenty-eight) tabs you have open for your research when you hear your door knob jiggle. You don’t think too much of it, trying to stay focused on the task in front of you before you give up and start scrolling through social media again. However, your discipline doesn’t last for too long because the familiar rhythm of footsteps could only belong to one person. You look up to find Paige making her way into your living room like she owns the place (which she may as well, considering how often she’s around), depositing her duffle bag on the armchair. You greet her, returning to your work, but you feel the couch dip under her weight as she takes a seat next to you.
And then she sighs. Loudly. Dramatically, like she’s begging for your attention. Like you’re not busy. You glance at her from the corner of your eye, finding her staring straight at you, but she says nothing. A few beats pass. You add a new sentence to your paper, pausing to go back and find the reference page. She sighs again, more purpose and intent behind it this time, and your lips quirk slightly. Still, she says nothing, and the silence stretches on for so long that you’re sure she’s given up on trying to annoy you.
You write one more sentence before she leans over, sprawling out across your body, chin pressing into your keyboard. Your eye twitches as a long string of ‘M’s takes over your Word document. Paige sighs again, sounding forlorn, like a kicked puppy, and you know you’re not going to get anything done unless you entertain her.
“Okay,” you say, pulling your computer out from under her head, making sure to save your paper before you close the lid. “What’s wrong?”
Her face brightens almost immediately. “I am so glad you asked,” she states. “So, I’m walkin’ through campus today, right?”
“As one does.”
She hums. “And there’s a shit ton of tabling outside the student union. Frats, clubs, some vegan guy giving out pamphlets –”
“Paige,” you interrupt, raising a brow. “The point?”
“Oh.” She nods, collecting her thoughts. “So there was this club – forgot who they were, lowkey, there was a lot of letters – but on Friday, they’re hostin’ a Valentine’s Day contest and the first place prize is insane. I’m talking gift cards, cookie decorating kits, I think there was even a coupon in there for a fucking spa trip, or some shit, but you get the point, yeah? I wanted to sign us up for it.”
You had to admit – you were a little intrigued by it. Between your class work and Paige and her teammates giving you an aneurysm every week, you were in dire need of a spa trip and a little bit of relaxation. But more than anything else in the world, you knew Paige. You recognized that gleam in her expression – it was a feigned nonchalance, like she was being slick and trying to hide it. “What’s the catch?” you ask bluntly.
She laughs, the sound more surprised than amused, and her head shifts in your lap to gaze up at you. You try to ignore the way it sets off a swarm of butterflies in your belly. “What makes you think there’s a catch?” she asks.
“You’re Paige Bueckers,” you state. “There’s always a catch. Like I knew there was a catch when you asked me if I would hide fourteen blonde wigs in my apartment.”
“They were for CD!” she argues. You narrow your eyes at her and she huffs a little, amused, her lips quirking into a radiant smile. “A’ight. I guess you got a point.” You hum, because of course you do. Her expression turns serious as she sighs, for real this time. “It’s a couple’s contest,” she admits. “But hear me out, okay?”
“I don’t think I have much of a choice,” you grumble, but your mind is racing.
“There’s a couple rounds,” she explains. “Like, the first round is trivia. How well do you know your partner, type shit. They score you, then they eliminate the people who don’t know shit about their partners. Second round is teamwork. They’ll give you a couple of puzzles and the most points will go to the teams who work well together and solve the puzzle quickly. More eliminations, then the partners are separated and they’re asked questions about each other – about what, I’on know. That should be the final round of eliminations and then the remaining couples are ranked based on points and prizes are given. Light work.”
“Light work?” you echo, a little self-deprecating. “Paige, we aren’t a couple.”
“Well, not exactly,” she concedes. “But we know each other pretty well. And can you really say no to the spa coupon?”
You bite your lip, sighing as you truly contemplate it. She’s got you there. The prize itself is worth the heartache that will come with pretending like you and Paige are actually dating. “You sure we can handle it?” you ask.
She pats your side, almost ignorant of the way it sends electricity coursing down your spine. “Duh,” she says like it’s obvious, her lips growing into a confident, assured smile. “We’re a dream team, baby. We got this.”
You could only hope so.
You nervously adjust your dress as you and Paige stand outside of the large room that the Valentine’s Day contest was taking place in. You spent the entire week leading up to Valentine’s Day an anxious wreck – part of you was worried that you would slip up and say something that you would come to regret, maybe say something a little too real. You had to keep reminding yourself that you and Paige were playing a part and once that gift basket was in your hands, then things could go back to normal.
The two of you dedicated the better part of the week to perfecting your cover story. How you met, where you met, how long you’ve been together, all of the cheesy romance milestone moments that you were certain you’d be asked about. You mutually decided to not get too creative as maintaining the lie would become even more difficult, but you were confident in your ability to sell a story.
“You ready?” Paige asks you, drawing you from your racing thoughts as she squeezes your hand gently. You didn’t even realize her hand had slipped into yours. Now that you’re aware of it, it’s all you can think of. Her hand is strong, enveloping yours completely, and it brings you a calming peace you weren’t even aware that you’d been seeking out. Feeling yourself relax, you meet her eyes and nod, trying not to smile too hard when she beams at you.
As she leads the two of you inside the auditorium, you do your best to not stare too much at her. She’s dressed simply yet elegantly; donning a fitting suit that’s a light pink in color in honor of the occasion, the fluorescent lights overhead reflecting off of her stunning chains and the rings adorning her fingers. Her hair is tied back in her formal slick-back, the diamonds in her ears sparkling, and you really have to drag your eyes off of her. You’d already spent so much of the drive over staring at her and you’re sure she’d caught you a few times but was too nice to say anything to you.
The event had a decent turn out. You count fourteen couples at most, fifteen including you and Paige, although you couldn’t really tell if that was good or bad. Beating fourteen other real, actual, dedicated, in-love couples was totally manageable. So what if you and Paige weren’t actually together, but you were the most convincing pair of best friends the world had ever seen? She said you could do it, and damn it if you weren’t going to get that spa treatment.
The auditorium, however, was decorated to the nines. Lights and streamers were strewn about, various complementing shades of pinks and lilacs matching the Valentine’s Day themes. The tables were covered in pink tablecloths with gorgeous centerpieces. Honestly, you had to give props where they were due – this club has gone all out for this Valentine’s Day event, although you’re sure they probably splurged their semesterly budget on all of the amenities.
Before you or Paige have the chance to say anything to each other, you’re approached by a young woman wearing a pink polo shirt with the club's name and logo emblazoned on the chest. UConn, UMatter. You glance quickly at Paige, trying not to let the amusement show on your face as you remember her words – ‘There was a lot of letters.’ She was so full of shit. “Hi guys!” the young woman greets enthusiastically. “Thanks so much for signing up. What’s the last name?”
“Bueckers.”
The girl nods, scanning her clipboard before finding Paige’s name. “Okay, perfect. Let me show you guys to your table.” She leads you diligently through the room, craning her head over her shoulder to explain. “Madelyn’s gonna be around soon to walk you guys through the trivia section once we start, alright? She’ll let you guys know everything you need.”
You and Paige thank the club member and she offers you two one last smile as the two of you sit down next to each other. Paige’s hand finds your knee, almost subconsciously, and you try to find your dignity. It’s then that you notice the placecard in front of you – elegant script reading TEAM BUECKERS. With a quiet laugh, you nudge Paige’s elbow, drawing her attention to the paper. “‘Team Bueckers,’ huh?” you ask her teasingly. “You forget about me?”
“Never,” she swears. “I think they assign the names based on who registered. Trust me, I had a name lined up and everything. We were gonna be PB & Slay.”
You snort. “I’m Slay?”
“No,” she deadpans. “You’re PB. Keep up, please.”
“Of course,” you say obviously, like it’s definitely your fault. “I’ll do better next time.” She squeezes your knee under the table, smiling wryly at you.
Once everyone filters in, the girl who’d greeted you at the door makes her way to the front of the room, adjusting the microphone. She introduces herself as the president of the UConn, UMatter club, explaining some of their objectives and goals for the spring semester – you tune out a lot of it, which you’ll probably feel bad for later, but you weren’t here for the club recruitment. You were here for the pedicure that was calling your name this weekend. She makes it through the rest of her opening remarks, officially announcing the beginning of the first challenge: trivia. Several club members make their way to designated tables and a short, brunette girl takes a seat in front of you and Paige.
“Hey, guys,” she says, grinning widely and handing the both of you dry erase boards and a marker each. “I’m Madelyn. I’m gonna walk the two of you through today’s challenges. We’ll go back and forth – you answer one, then the other, so on and so forth. If your answers are the same, then you’ll get a point. Ready?” You and Paige hum affirmatively. “Alright. Question for Paige – when is your partner’s birthday?”
Paige huffs, her lips quirking into a smile as she uncaps her marker. “Light work,” she murmurs as she writes her answer down. “It’s a national holiday.” You roll your eyes as Madelyn laughs. Paige flips the dry erase board around, showcasing it to you and Madelyn, and you nod as Madelyn awards you both one point.
“Same question for you,” Madelyn says to you. “When is Paige’s birthday?”
You uncap your marker and write down your answer. October 20, 2001. “The world hasn’t known peace since,” you murmur under your breath, drawing laughter from Paige. You flip your board around and Paige nods smugly.
“Two for two,” Madelyn states. “Next question for Paige. What trait of yours is your partner’s favorite?”
You and Paige exchange a glance, her brow raising teasingly. She writes down her answer and you do the same, eventually flipping your boards over for the reveal. The two of you hadn’t exactly prepared well to answer this one, so you were hoping that you and Paige were on the same wavelength. You lean forward, glancing at her whiteboard, and smiling with relief when you see her answer: she likes my energy. Paige’s smile is smug, but there’s an underlying softness in her eyes. “Don’t laugh at me,” you huff, trying to explain. “You just — you have this way about you, like you’re kind, warm, you make people smile, and you always support them. You’re just genuinely good and, I don’t know, I really like that about you.”
Paige’s smile isn’t any less confident, although she seems a little bashful now, her cheeks tinging pink. “Three for three.” she says.
Madelyn tries to stifle her grin, but it’s clearly not working. “Next question is for you. When Paige is having a rough time, how do you help her relax?”
“With great difficulty,” you gripe, making Paige and Madelyn snort as you write your actual answer. By forcing her to chill the fuck out. You and Paige flip your boards, hers reading a much politer She makes me do nothing all day. Madelyn nods, awarding you the point, but you hardly pay her any mind as you meet Paige’s eyes. “You do too much,” you say, which makes her groan. “You overwork yourself and you microdose a burnout and I have to make you sit down and remember that you’re human.”
“You’re worse than me!” she points out.
You sniff. “This is about you,” you declare, “not me.” Paige rolls her eyes fondly, but she can’t help her laughter.
“Next question,” Madelyn says, grinning. “Paige, what did you guys do on your first date?”
This was a question that the two of you had prepared for. You both decided that a little bit of the truth went a long way and the truth was that you and Paige had no shortage of quasi-dates that you could easily draw from. You tried not to think too hard about that as the two of you write down your answers. You turn your boards, revealing similar responses of ‘we went to her dorm and made dinner together after one of her games.’
You glance at Paige and she sighs. “Don’t start,” she pleads.
“I’m actually a little invested now,” Madelyn chirps, which makes you grin and makes Paige bury her head in her hands.
“All I’ll say is that Paige shouldn’t be in the kitchen without supervision but I really admire her, um, willingness to get creative,” you say kindly. Your best friend pinches your thigh under the table and you jerk back, laughing. Not wanting to embarrass her in front of a stranger, you leave it at that, although you smile at Paige like you’re the only two at the table. “I had a good time, though. She made it memorable.” She smiles back at you, something tender that has your heart constricting.
The both of you knew the truth, though. Paige was not a good cook. She doesn’t make terrible food — dinner was delicious, but Paige is chaotic and an actual hazard. Watching her chop an onion hurt something deep inside you although she’d seemed so proud of herself. You didn’t have the heart to make fun of her.
“Five for five,” Madelyn says, drawing your attention back to her. “Next question for you. Who confessed to who?”
You and Paige lock eyes again, a silent conversation passing between the two of you, and you write down her name. You turn your boards, Paige’s name written on the both of them and you smile to yourself. “She was pretty oblivious,” Paige says, referring to you, and your smile falls as your jaw hits the ground. “I dropped so many hints and she just didn’t pick up on them. I eventually got tired—”
“Desperate,” you cut in.
“Tired,” she emphasizes, smirking at you, “so I planned out this huge romantic thing and at the end, she still didn’t understand so I told her straight up.”
You roll your eyes. “Maybe you’re just not as slick as you think,” you tell her.
“Nah,” Paige says. “I’m super romantical.”
“Sure,” you concede.
Madelyn stifles her smile. “Alright. Two more questions for both of you. Paige, what is your partner’s pet peeve?”
“If you get this wrong,” you grumble, hearing Paige snicker as the two of you write down your answers. After you flip your boards, she grins proudly when your answers line up.
“She hates not being taken seriously,” Paige recites. “She’s an English major. People always think it’s just easy or unimportant shit, like reading and writing papers, but she actually does a lot of interesting analysis and stuff that I never even considered. I’ll admit I was a little ignorant but she set me straight.”
“Wait, I didn’t know you thought that,” you say, honestly confused.
She shrugs, a little bashful. “I talk a lot but I listen. Sometimes when you leave the room, I’ll read your paper just so I can ask better questions. You get all… glowy. And… I’on know. I like seeing you happy.”
You blink once at her, genuinely touched, and if you weren’t head over heels for Paige before then you definitely are now. She squeezes your knee again, her smile crooked yet tender. Damn it. You are hopeless.
“That’s so sweet.” You’re a little shocked by Madelyn’s voice, but you clear your throat, refocusing. “Next one for you. What’s Paige’s least favorite season?”
“That’s easy,” you say, writing your answer down. Paige does the same. When you flip your boards, you glance at Paige’s, smiling wryly. “Paige hates spring. She has really bad allergies and all of the pollen is honestly a death sentence, so she’ll get all congested and sneezy and will spend a good two weeks bitching about it and how it makes her Jeep dirty.”
You glance at Paige, waiting for her to say something, but she just shrugs with a smug expression. “Last question for Paige,” Madelyn says. “What is something your partner does to show her love for you?”
Neither of you say anything, but Paige stares at you thoughtfully, another silent conversation passing between you. You don’t need to think about your answer as you write it down. On cue, you both flip your boards, Paige’s reading simply, She takes care of me. You can’t help the way your heart swells, a fond smile overtaking your face. “Before you, I wasn’t really the… you know, the receiver, I guess. Always in control, always expected to lead. You make me feel like I can just be me, which is really hard sometimes.” Paige laughs off the vulnerability, but you see right through it – the painful honesty.
“We’re equals,” you remind her, nudging her leg with your knee. “We take care of each other.”
“Yeah,” she agrees, her voice soft as she gazes at you. “I’m glad that we do.”
You spot Madelyn out of the corner of your eye, which sobers you up quickly. She smiles. “You guys are so cute,” she gushes. “Final question for you and we’re done with this round. What is Paige’s love language?”
You feel Paige’s stare on you as you write, but you don’t glance back at her. You can hear the scribble of her marker, her capping it. When you’re finished, you finally look at her, taking in the soft expression on her face, and despite yourself, a smile grows on your face too. Together, you turn your boards, your answers being the exact same once more — quality time and physical touch. “Ten for ten, baby,” you croon, raising your hand for her to smack her palm against.
“Great job!” Madelyn says. “Let me just go submit these scores and I’ll be back to walk you guys through the puzzle round after eliminations. Sit tight.” She offers the two of you a quick grin before she’s walking off.
“Ten for ten,” Paige repeats, nudging you a little. “We’re like that?”
“I guess we’re actually kinda good at this friends thing,” you retort, although part of you wishes you were anything but.
Paige’s subsequent grin is far too knowing, like she has a trick up her sleeve. “Maybe a little.”
You laugh a little under your breath, adjusting your dress and leaning back in your chair to get comfortable. Before you know it, the scores are officially in. You and Paige had a perfect one, so you weren’t all too worried about getting eliminated in the first round, but five unlucky couples ended up leaving. The two of you watched from afar, trying not to stare too hard at the retreating couples, although they made it hard. One girl walked out crying, gesturing wildly as her partner trailed behind her, a desperate expression on her face. Another one was pure anger, slamming the door behind her. You didn’t think that this club contest would get people so riled up, but you considered that it was probably the realization that your partner truly didn’t know anything about you. You just lucked out with Paige – she understood you.
Madelyn returns quickly and cuts straight to the point. She instructs you and Paige to stand up, handing the both of you a towel, and adjusts your arms until you’re holding the towels perpendicular to each other, almost intertwined. “The goal here is to separate from each other, but it can be tricky because the towels will tangle you up. We’re looking to see how fast you can solve this puzzle and how well the two of you work together. Are you guys ready?” You and Paige nod and Madelyn grins again. “Alright. You can start.”
Instantly, the room around you two is sheer pandemonium. The couples around you are moving quickly, trying to untangle themselves, but it’s clear that the panic is settling in. You and Paige exchange a glance, laughing to each other softly. “Game plan?” she asks you.
“We need to get these like…not perpendicular,” you offer helpfully, and Paige nods, adjusting her arms. The angle change makes your towels bunch up and twist at their centers.
“Spin around,” she instructs. You do as so, the towels untwisting around the middle. You pause to analyze your situation, trying to plan out the moves in your head as Paige does the same.
“Okay, bring your towel over my head and let me step through it.” After that move, the both of you glance down, taking in your situation.
Paige hums. “The rest is easy,” she says. You nod in agreement, a silent understanding passing between the two of you and you move in tandem, twisting and shifting and stepping up until you’re both finally separating from each other in record time, having completed the puzzle. “We’re like that?” she asks you again, her expression smug and satisfied in a way that’s only comparable to when she’s on the court and her lips are curling after sinking a contested three point shot.
“Dream team,” you remind her, letting the victory wash over you, clapping your hand against hers, although she doesn’t immediately release you, squeezing your hand with a proud smile.
“I don’t think I’ve actually seen anyone solve it that quickly,” Madelyn admits. “Or that calmly.” As soon as she says it, a commotion from the other side of the room draws your attention. There’s one couple that are twisted so unnaturally that it looks like they’re playing Twister, but it seems that the girl gets tired of the shenanigans because she drops her towel and storms out with a frustrated yell. “Case in point.”
You laugh and Madelyn walks away again to tally the points and make their final eliminations. Once everything is set, five couples remain out of the initial fifteen. After the last challenge, two couples will be eliminated once more and the remaining three will be given prizes in order of points. You and Paige were determined to finish strong – if the first two challenges were any indicator, you two had this in the bag. True to Paige’s word, the couples were being split up for the last challenge, and she offers you a competitive smile as Madelyn whisks her away.
You pass the time on your phone although Paige isn’t gone for long. However, what does shock you is the sudden bashfulness that’s clear as day on her features, like the last challenge had made her confess something important or she had to be vulnerable. You can’t help the sudden worry that seizes your body, but Paige rests a hand on your hip, squeezing you once with a confident smile. It couldn’t be that bad.
Madelyn leads you into an adjacent room where the president of the club is sitting at a table waiting for you. She smiles when you enter, motioning to the seat across from her, and it feels strangely like entering the principal’s office in elementary school, like you’re in trouble for something. The club president doesn’t spare any time for pleasantries and instead cuts right to the chase, something that you’re grateful for.
“I’m not gonna take up anymore of your time, but after seeing you and your partner perform so well in this contest, I only have two questions for you,” she explains. “This is our second year running this contest and no one has scored as high as you two have, which is kind of insane because the third round scores haven’t been added yet.” You smile politely, honestly unsure of what to say, but the club president continues. “How long have the two of you been together?”
“Going on three months,” you respond, thinking back to the timeline you and Paige had agreed on, hoping your voice doesn’t shake. You are a little surprised by how real your next words feel. “We were best friends for a really long time before then – we still are. Paige is just…that kind of person that makes you feel like you’ve spent forever with her, you know?”
The club president hums, agreeing. She pauses before glancing up at you, studying your features. “What’s something that you haven’t told your girlfriend, but you would want her to know?”
You hardly need the time to think about your answer, responding, “That I love her.” The club president’s expression softens, a smile growing on her face. “We haven’t, um, gotten there yet, but I mean it. I wanna make it perfect for her. She’s given so much to me in the short time we’ve been together and in the time we were friends. And she just…she means everything to me.”
She smiles. “I think you guys are perfect for each other.”
Despite yourself, you smile, a blush spreading across your cheeks. “I think so, too.”
After your solo questioning wraps up, you meet Paige at your table and you offer her a bashful grin, similar to the one she’d offered you when she returned. You don’t have the chance to say anything else to her as the final round of eliminations are being announced. You and Paige are spared, which doesn’t surprise you, and the two eliminated couples take their loss with dignity as they exit. Paige links her hand with yours – final three. In third place, Team Parker. In second…Team Hayes, which means that first place can only be –
“Team Bueckers.”
You and Paige relax immediately, high fiving each other in celebration. What you’re not fully expecting is the tight hug that Paige pulls you into, whispering a fond good job into your ear, although you can’t help the way you soften, sinking into her embrace. She leads you to the center of the room to collect your goodie basket. The various club members send you off with their congratulations, too, and you pretend to not notice the slick wink that Madelyn shoots you as you and Paige walk out.
The night air is cool, making you shiver slightly, and Paige doesn’t hesitate before she’s sliding off her blazer and settling it over your shoulders. You smile gently at her. “You won’t be cold?” you murmur.
“Nah,” she promises, nudging you. “I can handle it. You, though? I’on know.”
“That’s no way to treat someone who just won you these spa coupons,” you say, reaching into the gift basket to wave said coupons in the air. “C’mon, I clutched up, you can’t lie. And to think you wouldn’t have even had a partner for this if you didn’t rope me into it. I think we played our parts pretty well.”
Paige laughs gently, a tinkling sound that carries over the drag of the wind. “You still don’t get it, do you?” she asks, but there’s no true offense behind her words.
You stare at her in confusion. “Get what?” you respond.
“Do you remember that question Madelyn asked you earlier?” Paige says, her steps slowing, tilting her head down to look at you. The street lights reflect off of her face so beautifully, the blue of her eyes illuminated by the soft light. You can’t help the way your heart constricts at the sight. “‘Who confessed to who?’” You hum, urging her to go on. “You remember what I said? That you were oblivious and I dropped a lot of hints you didn’t pick up on?”
The gears in your brain spin for a few revolutions before everything clicks into place. “Oh my God,” you breathe out. “Are you–”
“Confessing?” she says, her lips quirking into a smile. “Yeah.”
“You dropped hints before?”
“So many,” she confirms.
“Oh my God,” you say again. You stop in your tracks, prompting her to do the same. The expression on her face is endlessly amused. “You planned a huge romantic thing – this?”
She shrugs. “The contest was the club’s shit, but yeah. I planned on asking you to come with me to this. I didn’t actually care about the prize, but the coupons are pretty sweet, right?”
You shake your head, ignoring her rambling. “You planned a huge romantic thing, but I still didn’t get it at the end, so you told me straight up,” you finish, partly in disbelief. “You think you’re so fucking slick, don’t you?” you accuse, which just makes her break out into laughter. “You literally sat next to me and told me exactly how you were going to ask me out and I didn’t know? And not only did you do that, but you were right about it?”
“I know you,” Paige says a little smugly. “And I told you that I could be romantical.”
“You are such a pain in my ass,” you whisper, but her arm is slinking around your waist, pulling you into her body as she grins insufferably, and you let yourself be pulled, your hands resting on her chest. “You are literally so annoying.”
Her nose brushes yours as she inches a little closer. “You know what they asked me in the final round?” she says, her voice loud enough for only you to hear. You nod. “They said, ‘What’s something you haven’t told your partner, but you’d like to?’”
“Funny,” you say. “They asked me the same thing.”
She smiles at you. “I told them I’d tell you that I love you,” she confesses.
Your cheeks burn as you register her words. “Funny,” you say again. “I told them the same thing.”
Her expression shifts, something like relief flashing in her eyes, something tender in her gaze. “Did you?”
“Well, I told them that’s what I would tell my girlfriend,” you trail off intentionally. “Seeing as I don’t currently have one of those…”
“Don’t play,” Paige murmurs, squeezing your hip gently, drawing a laugh from you. “Be mine?”
“You gonna share those coupons?”
Her eyes are bright when she responds. “I’on even care about them. Just want you.”
“You’ve got me.”
That promise is all she needs. She smiles at you, happiness in her features, and she doesn’t waste any time before she’s leaning in fully, her lips finding yours. You’re eagerly responding, melting into her as her arm tightens around your waist. You loop yours around her neck, standing on the tips of the toes for better leverage. Before you know it, her grin grows too wide and the two of you are laughing against each other’s lips, the sound of your love and giddiness the perfect way to end a perfect night. If you had Paige Bueckers and her annoyingly charming antics to look forward to, then one thing is for certain – you couldn’t wait to see what she had in store for Valentine’s Day next year.
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y'all sleeping on Astarion/Lae'zel bc this moment is so...the way the flippant demeanor drops and he doesn't hesitate to call her out for sticking with her version of Cazador like their relationship is so underrated fr...
sitting down writing this bullshit like let me peel it like an onion a bit and elaborate why this pairing is fascinating to me
It's really interesting how during the most cathartic, life-altering moment in Astarion's questline, the reactions of the other companions are more about the moral wrongness/guilt of sacrificing innocent lives. Lae'zel doesn't do that and instead relates to his hurt.
She knows what's he's feeling, the lack of control, the unfairness of being powerless for too long. This is a woman who just found out her entire life purpose was built on lies, discarded and hunted by her own people after outliving her usefulness, and groomed to basically die for an insane power-hungry lich queen. She knows all too well that power isn't always real freedom. Her first instinct is to empathize with Astarion to steer him away from his hate and resentment.
Astarion/Lae'zel is so interesting to me because they're such a classic "can we make each other worse or make a better person out of the other?".
They both have genuine appreciation for violence and respect each other's ruthlessness. Astarion was used as a weapon of seduction while Lae'zel was of warfare. Sex with people is meaningless and not real intimacy for them, and while both have little understanding/experience of interpersonal relationships beyond the physical, they still feel and love very deeply. They have no frame of reference for things like friendship and warmth, but they badly want all of that and more, even if they don't know it yet.
In-game they can sleep with each other, which is basically the foundation of the normal Tav/Astarion romance. Lae'zel saw him during combat and got horny, who knows. Astarion who's used to luring people with his charms, takes up Lae'zel's blunt offer because she's a strong hardened warrior that can provide protection and be a worthy ally, and he doesn't know how to say no. Navigating the complications between one who wants to be seen beyond as a sex object, and one who comes from a totally alien culture with no concept of love/family/connections and only sex is honestly really compelling to me. It's a transactional, mutually beneficial thing with no emotional expectations. Once you get past the skeevy rockiness of their early relationship, I really like the idea of them slowly seeing something past the exterior and realizing they may have harshly misjudged the other, an unspoken friendship blooms, and in comes the realization that they are essentially loners longing for kindness and a comforting touch in the most desperate of situations.
Lae'zel is prideful, direct, has no sense of courtship talk, and doesn't hold back her thoughts the slightest--she's not sweet/agreeable and what you see is really what you get, which I imagine would be disarming for Astarion who's used to vacuous flattery and has difficulty trusting others. But she's also insanely protective, passionate, loyal, and an initiator-- every romance scene is triggered by her first and she's always showing effort towards her relationships, which would mesh well with Astarion who does need someone to nudge him.
She doesn't purposely suppress her feelings, she's just simply at loss at how to express them sometimes due to her wildly different upbringing. She stops the sparring match you agree to and an easy vulnerability slips instantly out of her: "I don't want to hurt you. I want to protect you, and for you to protect me." and "Thus far I've taunted you, devoured you, battled you. Now I want more than anything to soothe you." are romantic as fuck and Astarion of all people really needs to hear that tbh.
Astarion is also someone who struggles with reinforcing his boundaries, and a key theme in Lae'zel's romance is that she encourages and wants you to challenge her and learn to stand your ground. It's not gentlest method, but hey, relationships are about having to make an effort to learn each other's language.
I think he also would take pleasure "educating her on the matters of Fay-run" (I believe there's a whole banter with him teasing her and teaching her pet names) and would get a kick out of coaxing Lae'zel out of her shell with her shyness at showing public affection, and making her blush. Also it simply would be fucking funny to see Astarion who's used to easy seduction, trying to pass a persuasion check just to get a smooch and generally having to work to earn regular kisses from Lae'zel lmfaooo
Lae'zel also initially struggles to see her chains as chains. When she learns about Vlaakith's betrayal, she copes instantly through denial and shuts it down. Astarion is NOT having it and calls her out, he knows her well enough to recognize that she would value blunt honesty above all.
I imagine he also despises her lack of self-preservation, the way her entire identity is tied to duty and being in service of others, and doesn't understand her desire to still help/liberate the people that want her dead and are hunting her down. He wants to make this duty-bound soldier realize that looking out for herself, and putting herself first may not be the worst thing in the world.

They're so similar to each other but are also polar opposites in some ways that make a more equal, balanced romance I think. It's not a simple, one-sided, feel-good "she/he can fix her/him" fantasy because both of them have to earn each other's love, actually cut through the other's flaws, and actively motivate each other to be better versions of themselves.
They're not at all the other's ideal guiding hand. It's rough, jagged, and imperfect, but that's how healing goes. It's so far from being the healthiest relationship -- but even if their belief systems differ, their moral compass does often align. I imagine it's a slight relief for them to have a partner where there would be less shame and judgment when they expectedly, occasionally slip up and fall into their bad habits.
Also, man, the "You showed me the betweens and beyonds. Beyond war and peace, beyond passion and obsession, most importantly, you showed me freedom.", "First you were my wound, now you were my cure.", "But you saw something else in me - someone else I could be. Someone who could break the cycle of power and terror that started centuries ago.." lines really hit hard when applied to them.
Of course, they can also make each other worse, feed into the other's negative traits that will bring out the worst part of themselves. It's this duality of their pairing that is very interesting to explore, the way it can steer in either direction because it's an intense, fraught relationship at its core.
#when he gets called by omeluum “child of the dark” and her “child of the stars” like yeah..the squid man is being literal but he Gets It fr.#lae'zel#astarion#bg3#baldur's gate 3#bg3 meta#astarion ancunin#astarion x lae'zel#lae'zel x astarion#the rarest of rarepairs they dont even got a ship name...this is so tragique we need to discuss the pathos and potential of this pairing#bg3 lae'zel#bg3 astarion#also im a sucker for stoic knight/court darling trope and whatever variations of it yeah#bloodbruise
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Rambling about Astarion bc im bored at work. I like Astarion because I think he is a genius take on The Evil RPG Companion, and is an especially great take on The Fixable Bad Guy. I don't think hes evil, but I do think Astarion is a genuinely bad person at the beginning, and I think Astarion is only drawn away from being a bad person - and experiences a great redemption arc - via active intervention from others. Astarion would not redeem himself without guidance; he is absolutely bent toward self destruction and evil at the beginning of the story.
I think comparing him with Shadowheart is what drew me to that conclusion. If you are nice to Shadowheart, as in you talk to her and respect her boundaries and do stuff she generally agrees with, she will choose to free Nightsong all on her own. You don't need to roll to convince her at all, or romance her or even push back on her Shar worship that much. You just leave it up to her, and she chooses that path. (Side note, what brilliant writing.)
Astarion is not like that at all. Even if you were tight as fuck he would not choose the good option, with no input, in Act 2. Astarion, like all the companions, needs help and connection to reach healthy actualization, but I think its great, resonant writing that Astarion needs the most active intervention of all. Because he's had his autonomy so completely taken away from him, he simply doesn't know how to use it anymore. He doesn't know how to connect with other people anymore. He's someone that's learned to enjoy cruelty, to resent the pleasure of others, and to be entirely selfish for survival. It makes sense that he must be dragged back into being capable of trust. He needs to be forced to be part of a community again; caring about things; allowing for vulnerability and optimism.
And like. How fucking smart is it to have THIS guy in THIS game. Because of the tadpole and the existential threat they're up against, he is actually forced to work with you. This kind of character is so hard to do in most RPGs because its like... why wouldn't he just betray you all and leave? Why would he stick with you? The tadpole clears all of that up. Astarion must stick with you or hes lost and dead. Astarion knows that you and the other companions are collectively stronger than him, so he can't betray you. He is forced to rely on you by default.
This is also what makes him SUCH a good version of the "you can fix him" romance; you are almost never the direct target of Astarion's bastardry because he can't fuck with you. The problem with Fix Him's is that usually they are a threat to the romantic lead, and fixing him requires enduring, soothing and forgiving the worst of his badness as some kind of test of loyalty, hopefully proving to him that being bad isn't necessary (toxic shit). But Astarion... can't do that. He is afraid to actually fuck you over because you are directly tied to his survival, and because you quickly show yourself to be more capable than him. He cannot have real power over you. (Until he's ascended, then he becomes the absolute worst version of the fix-it.)
I do think the trade off is that Astarion not directing his bastardry at you makes it easier to Ignore that Astarion is A Bad Guy, but I think that'd happen even if he was more of an asshole to you, so who cares. I think he's got the best written Redeemable Evil RPG Companion arch I've seen honestly. I love that he's so fun while being so tragic, whether redeemed or not.
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── .✦ 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐠𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐦𝐞 𝐛𝐮𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐟𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐬
𖹭.ᐟ warning: nsfw content (18+) + Dom!Sae Itoshi and Dom!Saeko Itoshi + Sub!Afab!Reader + Threesome (MFF) + Love Corner (bcs sae likes reader and saeko likes reader) + Saeko and Sae are both twins (fictional) + p in v + pussy eating & rubbing + squirting + fingering + accidental walk in + a lot of kisses and marking + fingering and overstimulation + pet names + dubcon + kissing, a lot of kissing + unprotected sex
a/n: Saeko is fictional and was just made up genderbend ver of Sae sorry for ooc
You aren't aware that Sae had a twin. You only know that Sae had a younger brother, Rin Itoshi. You never met Saeko since Sae rarely mentions about his siblings. Until you came over to his parents' house. You had dated him for almost 5 months now, until you stumbled upon a family photo, placed on the console table surrounded by picture frames of family's photo and other house's decor. Of course, you recognize Sae, Rin... and another female standing besides Rin with a blank expression and doesn't seems to be smiling, just like Sae in the picture. She's looks exactly like him... could it be...?
"are you coming?" You heard Sae is calling for you, upstairs. You forgot... Sae's parents aren't here. It's just the two of you. Rin will be home, soon. Shaking your mind off as you held that question in your thoughts as you follow him upstairs to his room. The magenta hair male open his bedroom door and moves to the side to let you in first.
The moment you take a good look around his bedroom. "...You seem shock that I have a twin sister." Hearing his cold demeanor voice from behind, quickly turning your head when he opens his mouth.
Those cold teals eyes staring at you, like he is digging inside your soul. "...w...what's her name?" You asks, with a nervous smile on your face.
"Saeko." He answered, shoving his hands in his pockets of his white tracker jacket.
"...Oh..." you answer, "...S-She's pretty..." Giving him a small smile, trying to be polite, a small heat appears on your cheeks as the two stare at each other.
"..."
"..."
The silence is loud as Sae continues to stare at you, feeling nervous, if you had offended Sae or the whole Itoshi's bloodline. You can feel the sweat dripping down on your back to the back of your clothes.
"...Sae, did I-" you open your mouth, about to speak, until he interrupts you.
"You like her, do you?" Sae asks, straightforward which that caught you off guard. You never met his twin sister before, aside you indeed met Rin, the youngest brother of the Itoshi's family.
"What...? N-no, I... I personally never get to meet her..." you stumbles as you tries to waves it off that you don't want to be rude, to the Japanese prodigy that you are dating! That's cheating, right? You love him, and he knows that. He wants to test your boundaries. He steps forward with his hands in your pocket. He towers you, with his teals piercing eyes staring into yours.
"...Prove that you love me." The magenta hair soccer player spoke, his voice fill... coldness and seriousness, too. It's scary... you also love him.
Without thinking, you lean forward, capturing his lips. He doesn't seems surprised or stepped back. You can feel his hands gripping your shoulders blade, in a tight grip. The sounds of lips smacking, yours and Sae's tongues dances on each other as saliva is dripping down your chin. Your fingers digs into his white tracker jackets. You can hear his low grunt escapes from his mouth as he continues to kiss you, completely breathless, like he is addicted to you. Feeling his hands slowly moves from your shoulders' blade up to cup your heated flustered cheeks, holding you.
"...I'm gonna... f-fucking ruin you..." he lets out a low growl. You couldn't have enough time to breath as you are a mess.
---
"I can't- please- I can't- AH!" The sounds of your high-pitched cries & moans. Your fingers dig into his magenta hair while the Japanese prodigy is sucking and eating your pussy. Sucking and licking all of your wet jucies like he is some kind of madman who never ate good food. His fingers dug your thighs, preventing your legs from closing in. Your clothes were stripped, while Sae didn't. He was impatient enough to torn your clothes and push you on his bed.
"Stay still, don't move your hips..." He groans, sounded annoyed. Feeling his erection poking his boxer while he continues to eat your pussy. His tongue swirls your sensitive clit as you couldn't help, tremble and cry louder. The back of your hands is covering your eyes, toes curls. While Sae continues to slurp and suck your now sensitive clit.
"Whoa, looks what the cat dragged in... shouldn't had closed your door." A female voice emerged from outside of Sae's bedroom, causing you to freeze, lifting your head to see who it was. You know it's not... the mother...
Your eyes widen in horror as you met face-to-face with Sae's twin, Saeko. She is standing there, holding a duffel bag over her shoulder and her hand shoved inside her white tracker jacket.
"You came home early." Sae let out a small scoff, wiping his chin with his wrist with annoyed expression on his face that his twin sister is back. They... They indeed look exactly the same...! Same hair color, eyes, their infamous bottom eyeslashes, expression, and tone... and same personality...?
Saeko's teal eyes met yours as she leans against the doorframe of Sae's room. You notices her eyes is roaming your naked body, embarrassingly covering yourself. She already taken a liking of you. What you didn't noticed that... Saeko already liked you. She never got a chance to introduce herself to you, but her twin brother made himself clear that he is possessive of you. You belongs to him. She wants to steal you away from her twin brother. She thinks you're cute when she borrow her twin brother's phone to contact mom, until she accidentally click on the notification from your text messages. A picture of you sending Sae a quick selfie of yourself. You look... so beautiful and cheerful...
"You're..." you mumbles, meeting Saeko's eyes.
"I'm Saeko. I'm Sae's twin sister. Pleasure meeting you..." You watched when she dropped her duffel bag down, entering her twin brother's room. Without hesitant, Saeko grabs your forearm, pulling for a kiss. You and Sae are surprised. You can feel her tongue swirls and dances your tongue, letting out a whimper and your arousal slowly climbing in the heat, letting her taste every part of you. You felt a forceful pull, interrupting a kiss. You can feel Sae's arms wraps around your naked waist. Your back leaning against his white tracker suit. Saeko didn't seems surprised, still giving him a blank stare, also annoyed. Sae is glaring at his sister, like she had committed a crime or something.
"You don't touch what's mine." Sae threatened, his teal eyes glaring at his twin sister.
"...Hmph, I can treat them better." Saeko licks her lips, her thumb gently wipes the bottom of her lips.
"They belongs to me." Sae hugs your naked body, tighter.
The bedroom is filled with intense vibes. It's like being in a room full of two wolves. He doesn't like to share. Not with Rin. Not with Shidou and not even his twin sister that already taken a liking of you. She wants you. She wants you badly. She wants to steal you away from Sae. Her eyes still remain staring at you, itching to snatch you away from her twin brother and kiss you again. You taste good...
"...So, how about this..." She said, slowly stepping towards you and Sae. She is standing in front of you as your body is being sandwiched between Sae and Saeko. "...How about, we make them cum to see who can pleasure them more?"
Saeko suggested causing your body to shiver. Sae remain glaring at his sister. He seems... to agree with his twin sister? Quite... unexpected. "...Hmph, I can see why not." Sae agree with a small scoff escapes from his lips.
You felt your spine shiver and feeling your cheeks flustered. Their eyes foucs on you. Saeko's hand cups your cheeks, giving you a gentle squeeze, forcing you to look at her. "Do you think you can handle us?" She spoke, causing your spine to melt, the way she spoke while cupping your cheeks with her one hand.
"...Hmph, they're ready." Sae scoffs, swatting his sister's hand away from your cheek, stealing a kiss from you. His tongue swirls against yours. Your nails dug into the sleeves of his white tracker. Saeko, not wanting to feel left out as jealously raising inside her, leaning forward attacking your bare neck. Sucking and biting your flesh while you let out a muffled whimper noises. Her fingers roams around your breasts, playing your nipple. Her lips moves away from your neck as she begins to suck your right breasts, sucking and lapping your nipples while toying your left nipple. Your body is trembling from this pleasure, while Sae's fingers dug your cheeks. He wants you to focus on him, him only.
"...I think they're ready..." Saeko slowly pulls away, her other hand gently massage, your already overestimated pussy, causes you to flinch and yelp.
"...They are." Sae, too, pulls away, cupping his one hand your arousal expression on your face. Cheeks are hot, drooling like a dog during a hot summer.
---
"Ah...! Mm...! Ngh...! C-Can't- Oh! Fuck!" Your moans echos in the bedroom, legs spread, naked, your back is leaning against Saeko's chest while she is toying your nipples, whispering praises in your ears. While Sae continues to eat your pussy, his hands gripping your thighs to preventing it from closing. Your fingers clenched on the bedsheets and on Saeko's white tracker sleeves. You can feel Sae's low grunt and his tongue lapping every single jucies and swirling your sensitive clit.
"Ah-! No! Too much! Too much!" You cries, squirming, while Saeko still had her arms around, preventing you from squirming too much. Tears are already forming in your eyes and Saeko kisses your teary eyes and cheeks.
"Shh... you're doing great... let out your pretty moans for us..." She whispers, pecking her soft lips against your heated up cheeks, a kiss to distract you from Sae. Her fingers continues to toying your already sensitive nipples. Until you feel, Sae's finger inserts inside of your walls. Your body jolts, causes you to squirm and cry. He slowly insert another fingers, into your warm walls.
"Tight..." he hisses. His two fingers wiggle and begins to move inside of your walls while he continues to eat you out.
"N-no! Ah! Please-!" A shakey cry escapes from your lips, "Ah-! Ngh...! Ah! ...A-Ah!"
Saeko's hand covers your eyes. Slowly moving her body to suck the left side of your breasts/nipples. Your body is overestimated. You can only hear your breathless moans and the sound of Sae and Saeko lapping every part of your body. It's good. It's feels so good...! Her hand slowly removing from your teary eyes, moving towards your neglected right breast as she begins to pinched and swirl your right breasts, adding more heat inside of your body. Your body is screaming from too much pleasure.
Sae's fingers found your g-spot as you let out a quick gasp escape from your lips, which that gotten Saeko's attention.
"Look how good you take it..." she whispers in your ear, connecting her lips against yours, muffled your pretty moans.
Sae pumping his two fingers faster insides your tight, warm walls. His tongue is slurping and lapping your pussy and already overestimated clit. Your body is already trembling, hard. Your fingers already dug Saeko's white tracker jacket, causing it to wrinkle.
Sae wants you to make you cum. His dick is throbbing from his pants. Demanding that he wants to fuck you, badly. He wants to be inside of you, so badly. Sae quickly pulls away, since he didn't have the patient of eating you out anymore.
"Screw this... I can't take it anymore." Sae growled under his breath.
This caught Saeko attention, her lips immediately pulled away from yours. "What the fuck, do you mean?" She asks, not sounding pleased and also annoyed.
Sae immediately pulls down his pants and remove his boxer. Not condom, no protection. He immediately grabs your legs, quickly pulling you away from Saeko, causing you to yelp. Laying on your back on the bed. He didn't hesitate and began to bury himself into your warm walls. You letting out an exhaling moans escapes from your lips. He grips your thighs, he begins to thrust in and out of your tight, warm walls.
"Ah-! Ah...! Mm...! Ah! T-Too fast...!" The sound of your moans and cries. It's smells like intoxicating sex in here. The sound of wet skin slapping echos in the room. Saeko leans forward, gently massage your lower abdomen, feeling a bulge from your tight warm walls, causing you to squeal.
"Look how beautiful you look all spread out..." Saeko softly coos in between your ear and cheek. She kept pecking kisses on your aroused face and continued to whispers praises at your ears.
You can hear Sae's low grunt, his hips continue to pound your insides. His pace isn't gentle, most likely rough. Saeko leans besides you, rubbing your lower abdomen, feeling the bulge and Sae's cock going in and out of your warm tight hole. Until you felt Saeko's hand guide down towards your clit, circling her fingers around your already overestimated clit.
"AH! T-Too much! AH!" Tilting your head back, letting out a loud moans mixs with cries escapes from your mouth. Your hands grips on Saeko's wrist, but she refuses to let go and continue to pleasure your clit while her twin brother continues to drive your already fucked warm walls, going in and out. The pace is too much as they're going faster, trying to edge you over.
"God, you feel amazing..." Sae groans, sweat dripping down his jawline and his half revealing unzipped white tracker jacket that he refuses to take it off due to him being impatient, having an urge to fuck you good.
The sounds of your moans echos in the room along with the sound of wet skin slapping. "You like that much, hm?" Saeko whispers, hinting a scent of sharp, cool air with the acent of sharpened herbs. It's quite addicting... the sharp exhale escapes from Sae's lips while he continues to slam his length deeply inside you, kissing your cervix causing you to roll your eyes back.
"...you feel that? Don't hold back your orgasm... I wanna hear it..." Saeko whispers, feeling her small breath into your ears, made you shivers.
"A-Ah! Please...! Wanna come! Ah! AH! A-Ah!" You pleaded, clenching on Saeko's wrist, tightly. It doesn't hurt her, continuing to rub her fingers against your already overestimated clit. They can see that your body is twitching, like crazy. They knew that you're gonna come soon. They're didn't stop as you are crying and trembling from this overwhelming stimulation pleasure.
The Itoshi's twins continue to pleasure your body like you are some kind of toy for them, but you are perfect for them.
"W-wanna cum, you pretty lilttle thing...?" Sae croak, his teal eyes staring down at you. He hasn't stopped driving his cock deeply inside your walls. God, you feel good... he is addicted. The sounds of your moans and cries are like music to his ears.
"I need it! Please! AH! Ah! Aah!" You beg, tears roll down your cheeks, and your breath is breathless. The bed is creaking despite how hard that he is pumping his cock in and out.
"So pretty... so obedient..." Saeko murmurs, her other hands roams around your right breast and sucking your left breast. Her other hand foucs on overestimating your clit. Your mind is rushing as you couldn't foucs. It's too good. Your back arches, not even touching the wrinkled bedsheets. Her tongue swirls, biting causes you to flinch, then later sucking your nipple. Your mouth is wide open releasing all of the sweet moans and eyes closed.
Both you and Sae are feeling the shockwaves, releasing both of your climaxes. "F-fuck...! Ngh...! Ah... Ah..." Sae lets out a shudder grunt escape from his lips. The tip of his cock kisses your cervix, pushing it forward as he shoots his cum inside your womb. Meanwhile, Saeko manages to make your squirt, releasing all of your quivering orgasm as you watch that clear liquid squirt all over Sae and Saeko's fingers.
"Ah... Ah...!" Your body jerks, feeling Sae slowly removes his cock out of your used hole. He watches as his seeds slowly spills through your hole. They both watches you catching your breath. Saeko lifts her fingers that you managed to squirt all over her fingers and all over Sae's wrinkled white bedsheets. She licks your juices on her fingers... slightly sweet... and sour. She is addicted. She wants to hear more from you.
You're disheveled. Sae already fucked your stupid head and so does Saeko. You suddenly felt your head being lifted as Saeko captures another kiss. The kiss is messy as you're too tired to move. Sae's eyes widen when he watches his own twin sister kisses you again, tasting every single out of you.
"...It's my turn." She slowly pulls away from you, cupping your cheeks, then slowly look at her twin brother. Sae let out a scoff escapes from his lips, slightly furrowing his eyebrows. It's heavy and intoxicating here...
"Let's see if you can last longer..." Saeko response with a small smile crept on her face. "...Think you can handle me?"
𖹭.ᐟ: Part two anyone? Please let me know 🫶
#✧.*kiit write#blue lock x reader smut#blue lock x reader#blue lock#bllk#bllk x reader smut#bllk x reader#blue lock sae itoshi#Sae Itoshi#bllk Sae Itoshi#sae itoshi x reader smut#sae itoshi smut#sae itoshi x reader#bllk sae#sae itoshi#itoshi sae#tw dubcon#fem lock#femlock#does it count as femlock? if not i'll gladly to remove them please lmk
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!!! INTRO POST !!!
!! GENERAL !!
Hii :3 I'm Sasha, I'm transfemme, I go by she/her pronouns (She/it if we're close [You can ask whether or not I'm ok with it]), I'm a sapphic girl but I don't like labels that much, I am TAKEN, so no serious flirting, jokes chill though!! I'd love to be moots :))) I follow back basically everyone on here and would love to talk to you. I'm probably neurodivergent in some form and I've got ADHD and take medication for it. I have clinical anxiety which comes out fairly often because of my low dose of medication, here's my really cool pronoun page ^^ !!!
!! BOUNDARIES AND DNI !!
Serious Dni`s: Racists, Zionists, misogynists, homophobes, transphobes, ableists, , xenophobes, bigots of any kind, proshippers, pedophiles, anyone I know Irl (Obviously besides Rome, Finn, Moldy, Trezo, Noah/Max <3, Howl, Atticus, and Jane), and Nsfw (I'm a minor)
Other Dni's: Joe Hawley fans, Viziepop dickriders (Casual fans are chill bc ik that like 75% of queer people under twenty fw hazbin and hb), Rose/Karl (little-pangender-idiot), Zero/Lexton (himejoshilexfoster), Ballads of a Bluejay defenders, Booktok girlies, Drake fans, Dream dickriders, yall are freaks and i wont hesitate to block you.
!! FANDOM AND MUSIC !!
Fandoms I'm in include: The Cogwork Logs, The Magnus Archives, Camp Here & There, Witherburn After School News, Don't hug me. Im scared, The Forever Day, Toilet Bound Hanako Kun, The Promised Neverland, Fate Apochrypha, Pui Pui Molcar, Melliot, Starkid, Elliotly, Jhariah, Kendrick Lamar, Peysoh, Doechii, Master P, Tyler the Creator, Pusha T, Kanye's music NOT KANYE PLEASE NOT KANYE AS A PERSON, Playboi Carti, Baby Keem, Frank Ocean, J Cole, Nik Salah, Will Wood, The Crane Wives, Junie & the Hut Friends Mother Mother, Tegan and Sara, Lemon Demon, Ghost and Pals, Tally Hall, Charli xcx, Girly Girl Productions, SZA, Soddiken, Life series, Celeste, Minecraft, Cooking Companions/ Dreadweight, Lego Star Wars, Omori, Mariokart, Heartstopper, Adventure Time, The Boondocks, Steven Universe, The Owl House, Gravity Falls, CJ The X, Fd Signifier, Contrapoints, Hasan, Frogan, Current Idubbbz, Star Wars, Lotr, Lotf, The Good Place, Lego, AND WOMEN
All special interests are highlighted in purple. All hyperfixations are highlighted in blue, hyperfixations might often change because of my ADHD /gen
!! LINKS !!
Currently I have two side blogs:
@sashathesidebitch - Plain side blog!! If I am banned again, check that blog
@sashathegirlartcomp-april-2025 - ART COMPETITION!!!
Here's my notes post (All goals completed)
My Insta:
https://www.instagram.com/sashathegirlie?igsh=cXA1bm1iZzExZGJw
My Spotify:
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My AO3
My Discord: SauteedDipsyGreens
!! TAGS !!
Here are the tags I use to organize my posts! Keep in mind that no posts were organized like this before June 20th, 2024!
#sasha moment - Anything posted originally by me (excluding when i don't feel like tagging)
#sasha answers - When I answer an ask
#free sashathegirliepop - Anything about freeing my old blog.
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