#bc it's math how can math be wrong/

[gorgynei]

grin grin grin grin grin grin. grinn grinn listenn grin getting on t best thing ive ever done in my entire life grin

[antisocialgaycat]

you guys don't understand i am hopeless i need to get over her and start functioning like a normal human being again otherwise i am screwed

[svnflowermoon]

why can i literally not function at school like i swear i'm trying i just can't focus????

[hazardsoflove]

thinking about social worker percy again

[luthifer]

sometimes it think of like doing adult things like get a credit card to slowly work up a credit score that would maybe be beneficial and then i look at any guide on how credit works and every basic info and i'm like. i would rather just die instead

[lurking-latinist]

⛵

[nereidaa]

okay so apparently i got 11/12 in algebra for yesterdays final (yes im showing off) and today i was absolutely fucking confused with geometry. like i genuinely don't get how it works. i have no imagination or creativity or whatever and that's what i mean when i say it. i see a triangle and a problem (they absolutely made it out of nowhere, ew this is so cringe guilty). i have no clue how is it supposed to outcome as a rectangle just to know what the square of the triangle is😭😭

[miami2k17]

Are you autistic and or have a learning disability? I really relate when you post about math and those are the reasons I struggle with math. I was diagnosed after school years and without a diagnosis people didn't take me seriously without one and often thought I was just "refusing" to learn. Sucks big.

i was never diagnosed with anything except mild adhd which in turn i was never medicated for and i assume i grew out of. i (again not diagnosed by a doctor due to being canadian and doctors not existing here anymore 😭) have some kind of time-space synesthesia which bleeds over to things like the alphabet and numbers, which in turn affects the way i visualize math. i cannot think of abstract concepts with no visual, i don't understand how this is possible for some people, so when i do math i have to visualize it laid out in some physical kind of way, which means for anything larger than very simple addition (all i can do. i don't know how to multiply, divide, can barely subtract etc) i lose track easily and the whole thing falls apart. it's how i've always been since learning about the concept of time as a toddler. i don't understand how people can work with non-visualized abstract concepts like they're a human calculator 😭 i have to picture it almost like a big timeline

[britneyshakespeare]

i have been working with kids for four years and i had to write my first ever note just now about a seventh grade boy being inappropriate towards me. i don't know what the hell this could possibly lead to or what. he was trying to feel my legs repeatedly to the point where i had to stop sitting next to him (and i was subbing for his one-to-one para!!!). he's got high support needs. in that kind of job, you're supposed to sit next to them all day and look over their work.

the teacher whose classroom this was happening in could also tell something was wrong. the whole class was acting kinda crazy because it was the day before school vacation week and there was another class coming in to share projects. so like, he was swamped with keeping order already. but we were sitting two feet away from his podium at the front of the room. the kid was giving him and me a hard time when he wouldn't take out his chromebook as he was instructed. and then when he did take out his chromebook, he immediately, for some reason, places it on my lap. he had been ogling my legs the whole time. he puts his computer ON MY LAP. and i'm just like, stunned, because what the hell? can you not keep it on your own lap, for some reason? i don't even know what to say, i just hold it a little above my lap while i'm thinking why on earth would this be happening? he would NOT do this to his regular para if she were here, would he? this can't be normal.

and the teacher sees this and within a minute places a stool in front of the kid for him to put his laptop on. and i'm like. oh ok. yeah. he notices exactly what's happening and that that's not appropriate. and then when the other class comes in to share projects he tells me "miss b——, you don't actually have to sit next to c—— this whole period if you don't want to." and he grabs me a chair for me to go sit with the other paras in the back opposite corner of the room. like he KNEW. and thank you mr. d—— for recognizing that because i was just kind of shocked and didn't know if i was overreacting in my head to all of this.

when there's a point in the class where the kids are discussing stuff, i privately mention what's happened to the para who's sitting closest to me. and she says that the thing about him calling me pretty is something he's been known to do, but the fact that he kept trying to touch my legs is new behavior. and that's a completely different class of behavior. i was telling him NO, don't do that, and he kept doing it. and the fact that he was calling me pretty repeatedly, even when i was giving him instructions that he wasn't taking. and this is the second to last class before the end of the day, so she says she'll take a walk with him before learning center and talk to him about it, and i'm grateful for that. she does. the kid apologizes to me as soon as i come into learning center. but like. WHAT the hell.

i'm STILL like what the hell. this is unfathomable to me. the other adults who i told about this or who witnessed it were supportive of me. but. what to do??? i wrote a long note to his regular para about this, because i knew she was going to hear about it at least from the first para i told. the second para i told about it after school had a kind of... i'm not gonna say enabling reaction, but i suppose since it had already been "taken care of" (or at least, he had been spoken to and apologized) she didn't really have much to add in the way of discipline. i told her what happened after school and she was just like... a little bit, laughing? like oh, yup, that dog. she at the very least confirmed he KNEW what he was doing, that that was not an accident. she said to me "i had a feeling he was going to develop a crush on you" (me and these other paras were together for most of the beginning of the day too). but it's like. it's not about that.

i have worked with children for FOUR years. children have had crushes on me before; i'm quite unfazed by it. boys from the ages of 5-to-15 have told me i'm so pretty before and asked me to marry them. i've never had them feeling up my legs before. i've never had them making me physically uncomfortable. it's NOT about this seventh grader having a crush on the pretty substitute. he is NOT unusual for that, at all. but i've never had a boy of any age or education level repeatedly touching my knees and thighs. THAT is problem behavior!!!

because what if i wasn't assertive enough with him to tell him to stop? what if i was a girl his age? worse, what if i was an adult who encouraged this behavior? i don't come to the middle school to be a seductress. i had no intention in putting on a pair of tights and a skirt this morning of being viewed as an attractive object, especially not by a pubescent boy. what if i did though? what if his interpretation of me wasn't so incorrect and offensive? what if i let him keep touching me inappropriately and saying flirtatious things to me? me, an adult in my mid-twenties, towards a middle school boy?

in no world would that be ok. if i had been feeling up and overly-complimenting a CHILD at my place of work, holy shit would there be reports about me. so a child acting that way could never be ok either. if it'd be firable for me to be reciprocating that action, then that action should not be happening to me. ever. and that child should never repeat that action again to any other adult again.

like i am simply not there to be treated as an attractive young woman. i put on a skirt that shows too much knee and get paired with a boy, though, and that's apparently just a natural consequence. hooo-ly shit. like i don't know what to do. first of all, the more time passes since this has happened, the more i am just unable to stop thinking about it. i wasn't "hurt" or too emotional in the moment but i'm just still processing it and it gets worse. i'm just more and more disgusted.

i don't know what i expect to come out of this, or the email i sent to his regular para. like, am i gonna have to attend a fucking meeting? what is the precedent that this sets for him? WHY do i feel BAD for him about this? well, because he's a child, of course. a child who has done wrong he may not be able to understand. but he knows WHAT he did. he just doesn't know WHY it was wrong.

and i couldn't even say something to him that was like, "well, how would you like it if i was touching you like this?" because young boys do not understand how inappropriate it'd be. i'm sure this kid thought he was gonna get away with what he was doing at the very least. but probably not unlikely he (being a child with no concept of how wrong it'd be) thought he could get some sort of "positive" attention for treating me like this. either way he was simply doing what he wanted to do, with no perspective of how it would make me feel or that it could be classified as harassment. teenage boys think it'd be awesome if the older attractive woman would reciprocate their affections. they're wrong. i, as the older attractive woman of his affection, cannot be the one to convince him of that, though.

i don't know. i don't know. like it's just so not ok. but if i didn't tell another adult about this, he would've gotten away with it. he would probably do it again. and him being in trouble for it is not the same as him understanding that it was wrong. unless someone has a REAL talk with him about inappropriate attention and consent, it's not unlikely that he'll just repeat the behavior in a setting where he thinks he won't be caught or told on. THAT'S the problem. me, i could just never have to be this boy's para again. in my email, i didn't say that i would never be ok working with or around him ever again. he already knows i didn't like it and i'm not afraid to tell on him; as far as that lesson applies to me, individually, i think he's become too ashamed to repeat that.

i don't know. i don't know. i very much expressed that i, i guess, "forgave" him in the email that i wrote. i clarified that i was writing it for the sake of having it on the record. i think that could potentially be very important for the purposes of preventing further similar or escalating behavior from him in the future. i don't want him to be in trouble. i don't think i will be blamed for this, especially not with how promptly i acted, although i don't know to what extent this will be framed as me thinking i'm a "victim." i'm not... i don't feel victimized. i feel disgusted. i feel afraid for the sake of what could happen to or with him in the future, if he thinks behavior like his towards me today is ok.

i feel like if i end up having to further respond to this, this will be made about me. in a way it kind of was. is? in the moment it was happening, it was certainly about me. because i was the one this boy was giving all this unwanted attention to. but to make the consequences of this about me and to involve me any further, i also don't want. because i said what i said already, i don't care if a student has a crush on me. this isn't about me being the pretty substitute. i'm the pretty substitute all the time, to tons of people. that's not really something i've been concerned about up until now.

but do i have to reexplain my personal embarrassment? that i was wearing a skirt? that he was ogling my legs? really? what more do i have to gain from sharing that, other than having the adults at my place of work confirm or deny me in their heads as the pretty substitute? i don't know. perhaps that's REALLY overthinking it. but i don't want to be the substitute that caused a problem for this special ed kid. i don't wanna be the reason that he can't be around me anymore, the person people think of when they're monitoring how he's acting around girls and young women. i DON'T want to be the one people think of when they think of his past misbehavior. i'm NOT here for that.

that's just fucking humiliating. and in this being a thing that could follow him, i have to be ogled and touched over and over again in people's minds for this to be taken seriously. but for this to be swept under the rug would be even worse, no? i don't know. i hate this. the principal is a nice guy; i wouldn't be surprised if he and/or people from the special ed department reached out to me sympathetically about this. but i don't wanna be reached out to. i don't wanna have ppl i work with tell me "sorry that kid was just so attracted to you he couldn't help himself" like come on. if the kid himself doesn't change then i don't really care to remember this incident. and no one reaching out to me and saying they've talked to this kid will actually prove to me he understands. this is the kind of inappropriate behavior it takes years for people to understand why it was wrong, especially a child who has no idea. i mean come on.

[bat-the-misfit]

the way Ti doms see people is so funny

like they gather info to "how someone works" like they're some kind of machine or puzzle they want to solve

[4th-d-slipped]

calculating the max base stats of the mother 1 party members for smthn and

[Image ID: A screenshot of a table in Google Docs showing Ninten's max base stat totals. All of them, except for HP and PP, are 348. End ID]

why he like that

[natequarter]

i am so fucking glad i never have to study maths again because like, i legitimately cannot read numbers, lmao

[hollowwhisperings]

guess who just learned all their Tolkien math for the past year has been very incorrect?

i misremembered the calculation of valian years to coranari as being x3.582. it's actually x9.582.

(and i KNOW that this isn' the first time i've had this math fail in this fandom: deja vu like whoah about calculating Nelyo's time at Angband/Thongorodrim wrong: i was using "~27 years of the sun" instead of our fandom's standard roundup to "30+")

i have so much math to redo. DAMNIT, TOLKIEN. ;__;

[briar-rolfes-research-oubliette]

In Regency times it wasn't particularly common for girls to go to school, even super rich ones. So yeah it's not because they are poor it's because they're girls, sorry

Oh, sure, that’s a massive part of it—but we do see them compared constantly to “classier” women and that’s tied to the educational expectations for women, yeah? Like, Georgiana is so much better at the pianoforte than any of the sisters are. Miss Bingley and Lady Catherine are laser focused on how their etiquette is lacking. It is still about the education they lack, it’s just education in like, how to play music, how to do embroidery, and “nice girls don’t do that.” But you’re right, other than this quote unquote education (which as we see is limited pretty strictly to women of the middle and upper class) they wouldn’t have been schooled in like… biology or algebra by their governesses. But that’s all the more reason to not get 😍RETVRN 😍 about it, right?

[euamofotos]

cannot BELIEVE I may live the first day ever doing all my studies tasks in 1 (O N E) morning!!!!! this is wonderful i LOVE life!!!!! <3

[chainsawworld]

Most uncomfortable extra maths support period of my life g-ddammit