#bc i genuinely like washing rugs its so fun

[perilegs]

i was watching a reality tv show that had someone from my hometown in it and oh my god how can hearing your own dialect sound so much like home 😭😭 i live like an hour away from my hometown so the dialect there and where i live now dont really differ that much but it makes all the difference to me especially since i know the longer i live in here the less i start sounding like im from home

[batarangsoundsdumb]

guess fucking what? my inbox is so fucking full right now i'm unloading all of this shit in one post.

For the 11th gotham memes: gothamites react to bruce being jacked in a tiktok he made with kids, like super yoked, ripped as hell

fucking hilarious thanks. i think i did it in one meme post, but i genuinely don't remember which one

i dunno which of the batfam would do this but one time i was sleeping over at a friends house and ended up on the floor bc the bed was so very small and i just stayed there because the rug was soft

that's a drunk jason move i don't know what to tell you

tim and jason are "i listen to pop punk" solidarity. whenever jason highjacks the batmobile theyll go on long ass car rides blaring mcr and paramore and then never talk about it again

as they should!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! tim: no jason it's my turn using the aux cord i gotta put on my jams jason: don't you dare put on weird shit tim: don't worry, you're gonna love this *plays fearless (taylor's version)

hear me out hear me out, red hood stans 🤝 nightwing stans t h i g h s

holy shit yes.

SNL au: Bruce breaks character when pretending to superman and says something like "I'm not superman! You've seen his gps!! It's from 2001!!!" @sabeanybabe

superman flies past the snl building the next day just to say 'actually it's from 2005, i'm not a heathen'

does your back hurt from carrying the batfam fandom

it hurts more from the exotic rock collection i keep in my backpack, but thanks for the concern.

I love your posts by why would you always leave the best parts in the tags?

as a treat for the people that check the tags ;) (and also because i'm committed to the short post aesthetic)

somehow your playlist was everything i never knew i needed. i mean it. this is my new favorite playlist.

and don't you dare get a new favourite playlist!

babe ur stoner tim playlist is exactly too perfect, earth is literally blessed by ur existence

babe thanks so much! i love my stoner tim playlist because it's just my usual playlist but people think it's an artistic choice that i put taylor swift and britney spears in there, when it's just what i unironically like listening to

JANDKSKDK BILLY RAY CYRUS ON THE STONER TIM PLAYLIST I LOVE IT IT

again it's not even an ironic choice, i know every single word and i genuinely like the song

The last chapter of Fundamentals of Casework has me crying at work. Thanks I love it @dudelookitsalesbian

oh babe, i'm sorry, but also, not sorry i love chapter 4 so much it's my lovechild with the 'mental illness' tag

soooo....stumbled on your tumblr by some stroke of fate??? read your DC fanfic first. which is PHENOMENAL btw. then found all the batmemes; the funniest thing EVER bc everyone forgets about regular old gothamites. kept scrolling and your blog pops up as recommended. clicked on the ao3 for shits and giggles and waddaya know?!?!? it's YOU!!! you're LEGEND!!!! ever seen that meme? it's a video of a cat that got into a baseball field and the two announcers get really invested in his escape attempt and start giving a play by play of the cat instead of the game. memeable moment: "GREAT stuff from the Cat!!!"

i seriously think about this ask every single day and it's so fucking funny to me that i've never seen the meme you're referencing, but i still find myself going 'GREAT stuff from the Cat!!!' whenever i see something funny. but wow i'm glad you liked this steaming pile of garbage

Fav dc character overall? And fav batfamily character?

don't ask me to pick between the loves of my life, but i can tell you i've cried about every single batfamily member and also wally west (my beloved)

What's your opinion on fans having a problem with batfam being "too big"? And some even claim that batfam is just "Bruce Alfred Dick Damian" and the rest of them are just "friends and allies" (source: reddit) Personally, I like batfam because of this reason but idk

stupid. a family can never be too big. i'm not that big a fan of like huge batfam stuff with everybody from every single universe, because as much as it's funny for bruce to have like 30 kids, it just feels a little too OOC for me.

This is the best tag I've seen involving the batfam, thanks for thinking of it

This is canon now @nctxrejects

lmao yeah i think at that point alfred has had to sit through like at least a dozen coming out talks and just has a pride flag collection in the attic that he pulls out whenever a kid comes out

idk why batfam hits different as compared to any other superhero family

bc it's found family and usually the other superhero families are almost all genetically related in one way or another

I don't know if you watch the umbrella academy but I saw your last post about batcest and saw the similarities. But the thing is (although I think it's weird) in TUA, they addressed it by saying "they were raised as weapons, not siblings" or something along those lines, which is simply not the case with batfam.

yeah i watched tua but i also thought it was ridiculous and they still treated each other as siblings so i didn't like the luthor/allison thing, and am glad they stopped doing that shit bc it fucking sucked.

Hot take: Batcest shippers are the same people who believe adopted siblings are not actual siblings

smoking hot take: batcest shippers are the people who watch 'my sister got stuck in the washing machine' porn

Duke was adopted by Bruce?

not technically no, but do i, tumblr user batarangsoundsdumb, look like i care?

True story but I had to change my freaking name because it used to be "Damien" and most people would go "OH LIKE DAMIAN WAYNE" like please I'm just tryna live

true story, but i don't actually think of damian when i hear the name damian, literally the first thing that pops up is damian darkh like bruh what?

apparently dc comics company supported comic stores by giving out new titles and stuff during the beginning of the pandemic to help them run and I just think that's wholesome

ah yeah that's so fucking cool, still don't like dc, the company, because this world is a capitalist hellhole and we're all owned by warner brothers or disney with no in between.

ayo looking at tumblr head canons and finding out bruce is actually a terrible father is a punch in the gut

lmao yes, in like 50% of comics bruce is a terrible father and it gives me whiplash

oooh I just saw the jason todd vs winter soldier post and the real question is: batman vs iron man

while iron man has like hundreds of cases of armor, batman could throw out an emp and have the guy dropping out of the sky in 2 seconds.

dickfast = fastdick = quickdick = quickie

magnum hot take

hey bata(?) just thought I'd let you know I have copied the obnoxious emoji and Billy Ray post for use on simping men going forth

thank you ���🌷 (@spacebarsidecar)

why would you do that to your followers???? i get why i did it, but why would you???

what is scarecrow made the nightwing funko pop himself, like those diy-ers that paint over other ones

oh god no, horrible take, horrible take, that's a disgusting thought oh no

I see your HC that Bruce and Oliver fucked and raise you this: Dick and Roy ALSO fucked

yes they did and it was a horrible moment for jason to find out dick has fucked both of his best friends

"at this rate bruce adds like 1 child to his family every decade or so" Duke is introduced in 2013, Damian as Damian, not as an unnamed child, in 2006. And he is already 14 years old, Robins rarely remain Robins after 16 😬 It looks like a new Robin and Batkid will appear in a couple of years

i mean i can't wait? but somebody will probably die first tho, we're due for another major character death. my money's on either cass or duke this time.

BRO you're so right all of your Bruce's ex headcanons are amazing but they aren't ships, that's kinda wild. Like I don't want any peeks into how their relationship was I just want to see everyone make fun of them

lmao YES it's just i love bruce being a slut, like good for him.

I am in love with your posts your honour thank you

omg thanks are we like,, gonna kiss now?

The justice league needs to have a meeting to discuss how many of their members/partners have slept with bruce. Because through a combination of cannon & fannon (if DC wasn’t homophobic) we have AT LEAST: 1) clark 2) lois 3) oliver 4) dinah 5) john

Thats not counting villains or random civilians @dudelookitsalesbian

yes yes yes, they'll have a yearly meeting about how many of their collective exes could be out for revenge and batman's list just keeps getting longer.

tim was like "i'm drake now" and everyone was like ahh so your fursona is a dragon and tim was like pffffft no. ducks.

and what about it?

when steph's fighting livewire and she zaps her with lighting and nothing happens and then they both just. stand there awkwardly for a second and talk. yeah i couldn't stop laughing at that batgirl steph is the BEST

oh yeah that was fucking hilarious and i think it would be so cool and sexy of dc to give steph a little comic series,,, as a treat

Hi I absolutely adore all of yours "Bruce and Oliver very badly pretending they didn't fuck each other" memes

lmao i do too

I need you to know that “Bruce Wayne had frosted tips” is one of my favorite Bruce takes of all time it’s so galaxy brained. you’re right and you should say it

he also painted his hair blonde once when he was travelling and in conclusion, this is why he's being blackmailed by the gotham gazette.

you know my thing about gordon being branded as the only good cop in gotham is its a load of shit like arguably he's a good person and not working to screw people over or anything but the fact that he also works w. batman makes him a shit cop. like yea batman is better than the mob but its still illegal its still an abuse of power he just not making bank

babe, all cops are bad cops. (but yeah youre absolutely right, working with vigilantes makes you a shit cop, but also working against vigilantes just makes you an asshole cop yanno?)

ruh roh i think i’m about to add “so not yeehaw” every time i don’t like something

that's a very good vocabulary upgrade

somehow i feel like steph already knew. like babs obviously knew but i feel like bruce got high/drunk in front of steph and started telling his boarding school stories and steph was just like “oh you fucked up i’m never gonna forget this”

steph and bruce have weird uncle/rebellious niece dynamic and they just hang out sometimes and bruce will be like 'i once broke my arm when i tripped over a hedge when i was drunk so oliver drove me to the hospital on an electric scooter' and steph will just have to sit there with that knowledge in her head.

Hello I just wanted to tell you you are So right in all your steph opinions bc she is, in fact amazing and I think that's very sexy of you. Ps. Your Bruce/Oliver fic is hilarious

babe, thank you so much and yes steph is amazing and i love her and she deserves the world and she's the best member of the batfam hands down. also thanks

In Supersons we see a couple of kids that are implied to be Damian and Jon's children and the boy has laser eyes and can fly, so I asume he's not adopted. The girl, who calls Bruce grandpa, can also fly, btw. So it's canon (probably by accident) that Jon can have kids and he must have married one of Bruce's kids. (I'm hoping for Damian, mostly because any other of his children would be waaaaaaaaaaaaay too old.) @artemisa97

lmao that was probably an accident seeing as jon is a 17 year old superhero in the year 3000 (by the jonas brothers)

You know, I'm a die hard fan of your memes, but I gotta say one thing: if Gothamites actually took gas mask everywhere with them, then the Scarecrow would just be a weird dude in a weird costume, and not a villain oh so scary. DC really should just takes notes from you.

bold of you to assume there's no gothamite anti-maskers

How does it feel being the funniest person on this app?

horrible, next question.

I can't listen to Green Day or Billy Joel without thinking of your post about how Bruce got arrested at a Billy Joel concert @nightwings-kid

yeah that's your mistake, i on the other hand can't enjoy billy joel without thinking about the glee rendition of 'uptown girl'

I've FINALLY been watching the Batman animated series and I gotta say, after watching "the gray ghost" I am CONVINCED that Batman is a closeted super hero geek who was 100% freaking out the first time he met Superman and is just REALLY good at hiding it.

superman: so what do you do in your free time? batman, thinking about the superman fanfiction he's writing on the batcomputer: i have no free time

bruce and oliver be like boyfriends to co-workers 401k (do the justice leagues get 401ks??? not that bruce and ollie would need them, but-)

lmao yes just 400 thousand words of bruce realising 'oh dip oliver is such a fucking dumbass' (also i don't know what a 401 k is but i assume they don't?)

Gothamites would totally boo superman as he saves Gotham while batman is out. @meenje

he's like 'okay think about that next time you want to be saved from an alien octopus'

I just took long break from dc comics and I come back to see ric grayson ??

i think it's very cool and sexy of dc to see dick and just think 'you know what? let's just give him a traumatic brain injury' and then didn't develop his character in any real way

SPEAKING OF RIC GRAYSON, gothamites making confused memes out of ric grayson is much needed

'dick grayson is my taxi driver? can anyone explain what the fuck happened he looks like an italian plumber?'

i hate to say it but batfam are def "marvel characters" in that sense they are characters who are human but become superheroes unlike most dc characters who are gods trying to be human maybe this is why I like batfam

fair enough

[twisted-imagines]

I really loved your headcannons for sfw and nsfw headcannons for savanaclaw!! I had to stop reading it a couple times bc things got steamy ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°). May I request a scenario of octavinelle with MC and and the guys taking a bath together, it can be both sfw and nsfw (*^ω^*)

Woohoo! Right, that's what I was counting on😋 Thank you very much! I hope I caught your intention the right way because I read it like a bath together will all the boys at the same time 😏 You shouldn't have been worried, because there's also a hc ask, but thank you anyway~ So here it is, the smuttiest scenario I've ever written and headcanons for each character separately. Those are mostly sfw, maybe not as fluffy as you wanted, but I tried;

Please remember to use protection, leave your comments and enjoy yourself💗

Bath time with Octavinelle trio 🐙🐬🦈

Deep breathe in and breathe out. Your heartbeat was slowly returning to its usual pace. Finally, the hunt was over, Bean's Day a total success, mostly. Maybe it would have been even better if the competitive atmosphere didn't get to you in the middle of it and rendered you a useless, anxious mess. You were glad Leech twins calmed you down then and took care of you for the end of the event. Perhaps those types of games weren't meant for you.

Resting in the pleasant shadow of the forest's margin while waiting for Azul, you could see how hard they have worked. The way Jade was frowning and sighing heavily from time to time with Floyd just lying near him on the ground whining, not on top of his game anymore. When the white-haired man finally separated from the crowd you got up to wave in hopes of him noticing you. He spotted you quite fast and strode into your direction.

"Good job today, all of you. You gave the monster team quite a challenge, isn't that right, guys?"

The Octavinelle dorm leader's speech was flawless as usual, not betraying the bitterness from his earlier encounters and the adrenaline still present in his system. It was obvious, the facade he was putting on. You learned to see past it, after spending so much time with the boys. To you, their inner selves were much more interesting. You couldn't help but smile to yourself. The year promised to be the most vivid you've had yet if they continued to be the constant presence in your everyday life, those boys.

"Oh, aren't you spacing out, [Name]?"

"Right, right~ Pay attention to meee~"

Voices from both of your sides belonged to none other than the two brothers. You snapped back to reality. Floyd was now hanging off of your right arm, a quite usual occurrence you had to note, and his twin was closely observing your face. A slightly annoyed sight escaped Azul. All the running around was finally taking its toll on him, he looked weary and tired. It seemed even talking was too much for him at the moment, something which was not like him at all.

"The main event is over, but the closing ceremony will be conducted in two hours. We have just enough time to wash up, change, and rest for a bit. We're going to the dorm right now, you're coming with us, aren't you?"

It didn't feel like a question or invitation if anything more like a concealed order, but you nodded anyway. Spending the time in their company was always bringing up your mood and did they love to see you smile happily like that.

"Yay! Bath with koebi-chan! So fun~"

Hm? What was that again? When you looked at Floyd he was already was ahead of you walking with Azul, and even Jade turned away from you when you tried to ask what was going on. Was there anything you were missing?

At the Octavinelle dormitory, you were led to a spacious room, one you had never visited before.

"It was previously used by the residents as one of the dorm's conveniences. It didn't suit us, so for doing a complete renovation of this place, only the dorm leader can now allow to use it."

"And of course Azul doesn't let anybody here, except for us, hehe~"

You listened to Azul's explanation with the occasional remarks from Floyd about how that enormous parlor with a hot tub of the size of the pool was now completely off the limits for regular Octavinelle students. The interior made you think that you entered some underwater cave, it gave off an otherworldly aura. It was a simply wonderful resort. You could only look around and once again realize just how cunning and inventive those boys could be. You felt a warm presence on your shoulder, only to find Jade standing close to you with a usual charming smile playing on his lips.

"I shall show you to the changing room. There's also a shower, but don't take long. After all the main attraction is right here."

The adjacent room wasn't as big, but it had enough place for the four you. The setting minimalistic, the only furniture was a sofa and hangers with few dressers. You could see the shower on your right. Jade's gentle grip remained on you for a fleeting moment you were observing the room before he moved away. While you were contemplating your disposition, Floyd was already casually ditching his sports clothes. You gaped at the sight unfolding.

"Hm? Is something wrong, my dear? If you have some problems, I'll be happy to assist you."

Azul's voice had the most genuine concern in it but you knew better than that. "It's all preplanned", - was reading in his eyes. Wrong? Of course, nothing was wrong in how he languidly unfastened the belts on his uniform, in the sinful grace with which he was doing it. His azure orbs were unmoving, hypnotizing you with their gaze.

"No need... I was just thinking about how fitting those clothes actually are."

Trying to escape from the whirlpool the man was trying to take you in, your eyes darted in the opposite direction, accidentally falling on Jade's rear, still clad in those skintight pants. The merman's cheeks turned pink, not missing your action, slightly misjudging it even. Daring not to make eye contact, you swiftly occupied yourself with the task of undressing.

You could finally let out a sigh of relief, having fully submerged yourself into the hot water of the pool, generosity of Azul, who prepared it. You closed your eyes and tried to enjoy the calming aroma, the steam curling, and caressing your face, but the unyielding ogling of pairs of eyes was unnerving. You were not escaping out of this, you understood.

You could feel him ripple through the water, his hands enveloping your waist. It was the sight of Floyd looking up at you with a placid smile that welcomed you. He was resting on your knees, drops of water cascading down his face. He was still. For now.

"So?~ Pretty sick, land's "jacuzzi", won'tcha say?"

His effervescent voice echoed in the room, disturbing the quiet noise of popping bubbles. You stretched your hand to place in on his face only for it to be immediately trapped in his grasp. His token toothy smile slowly returned to his face. The temperature was rising. More and more closer Floyd was moving to you until two strong hands finally trapped you between his body and pool's side. Red against your skin, his tongue traced a way from your neck to jaw. Your breathing was now much more rugged than before.

"Tasty little koebi-chan~ You have no right to look so delicious-"

A bite followed. Floyd had successfully learned all your most sensitive spots and played them smartly even now. You could no longer keep your moans to yourself. The sweet noise spurred into action two other occupants of the room, who too longed for some attention.

"How greedy of you to steal [Name] all to yourself, brother. I too want a taste."

"You guys are not the only ones in the room. How annoying..."

In your peripheral vision, you could see them move closer until you felt your arm and leg being seized on each side. You were rendered immobile, each boy molding your body into the desired pose.

"Tsch~You two can get lost, for all I care."

Saying that in low voice, almost dropping down to a growl, Floyd was relentless in his task of forcing moans out of you, your already heated body unable to resist the pleasure he was giving you. You whined when his hand dropped down to your core, aching for more stimulation. Teasing and gliding, tension fluctuating, it was driving you crazy. When he decided that it wasn't enough for him anymore, Floyd dragged you out and hoisted on the cold surface outside of the pool. The difference in temperatures and his moist fingers plunging into your hole made you wail on top of your lungs. Your body was burning up and shivering from cold at the same time, wringing in his firm grip was just spurring you further into an igneous frenzy. Your vision blurry with water dripping down your face, or were those tears of pleasure, you were no longer the master to your body. The man before you controlled your every breath, every moan, his own form partly morphing to merman's.

White bliss overtook your mind when he sharply thrust into you. It wasn't gentle, at all, but it was precisely what you wanted, what you accustomed to, and welcomed with your very own thrusts back. Floyd's fast tenacious jerks were working you into an even more nonsensical state, the weight of his body on top of yours was superseding all your thoughts with flaming hot want. The lack of free air in the steamy room was affecting you, making you light-headed. The man rocking into you with immense strength was now your only leverage in the hazy world you were residing in at that moment. Continuing to bite and mark you up, his movements became even more erratic hinting at how close your lover was. You felt it building, the imminent release, when it finally crashed down upon you. Your last scream Floyd too claimed as his own, capturing your lips in his in a messy kiss, continuing to languidly trust up into you, riding out your orgasms.

While you were regaining your consciousness, a cacophony of hisses and screams, clearly somebody bickering, was the only thing you could hear besides the low buzz in your head. They stopped abruptly, a moment of calmness took place. You could register a shadow looming over you. A warm, somewhat slippery hand caressed your hot cheek. You couldn't help but lean more into a comforting touch.

"Barbarian-! My dear, are you okay? He didn't hurt you, did he?"

"Just thoroughly fucked~♡"

The harsh smack ringed through the room, most likely not reaching its destination. Azul's attention returned to you, the man carefully cradled you to himself, when you felt some smooth appendages slithering around your body. You reasoned, that just like the eel merman, cecaelia had also accidentally sprouted some of his octopus-like features. While Azul most certainly still stood on his two legs before you, a few tentacles, deep purple and supple, coiled around you gently, but firmly. He won't be releasing you just like that, will he?

"I'm fine Azul, don't worry."

""... I'm ready to be fucked again, go for it~" Ahaha- Auch!"

Another smack and Floyd's yelp now following it. Serves him well, mocking you like that. You drew the octopus merman closer to you and kissed softly in a reassuring gesture.

"Everybody did a good job today, only fair to have some recreational moment together. Come here."

Azul's blush only deepened from your bold invitation. He was being seduced and he had no objections to that. How jealous he had been, observing how his friend was selfishly claiming you. He could now be the one to touch and explore your soft, heated body. The thought of it made him immensely happy. The dorm leader didn't get to spend some time with you today, given you were on the opposite teams, so right at that moment, he wanted nothing more than to have you close to him, sighing languorously.

When you finally regained control over your limbs, you made the man release you so you could sit on him instead. The ell's rough loving still panged in your rear duly, but Azul soft moans and the sight of his sweet red cheeks aroused you too hard to ignore your cravings. Strong tentacles once again twisted around you, the young man was drawing you closer still, skin to skin contact was putting him to a state akin to trance, the need to have more of you, of your scent, your taste, your love overwhelmed him. You placed open-mouthed kisses down his neck and jugular, moving lower with each kiss and hickey until you reached the soft flesh of his chest. Azul was practically melting under you, pleasure clouding his mind. It was so long you made love to him, he missed the tender moments so much and here you finally were, on his lap, teasing his hardened nipples, eliciting more sweet noises out of him.

A loud sob broke out of him when you descended down on his hard cock. Swiftly encompassing your legs in a vice-like grip, his tentacles vehemently squeezing you like ivy. You could feel his suckers sticking to you, sure to leave numerous marks for you to discover later. The faster you started to move, the more vocal Azul became, his pleasured noises reverberating in the room. Desperate for more, he started to thrust up into you from his position bellow, but too shallow from being completely bewildered by the tightness of your hole. While you were desperately chasing your high, relishing in Azul's sexy expressions, eagerly kissing them away, you felt two hands reach out for your chest from behind. Jade was there flushed and needy, but the man made no other moves except for lightly twisting your nipple, aiding your second orgasm for that day, while his other hand was busy with his jerking himself off. It took just a few more thrusts for both you and Azul to reach your climax, with each other's names on your lips. The hot liquid that stained both your walls and back, was the evidence of the two men's release. Satisfied, but completely worn out by your lovers, you slowly drifted away to a dark bottomless pit of unconsciousness.

When you woke up you found yourself on the same couch you saw in the changing room, this realization coming to you a few moments later that the memories of your previous activities.

"Oh, you're finally awake. How do feel? Does it hurt especially bad somewhere?"

Jade's questions nearly missed you as their addressee, for you were slowly coming back to your senses, which also meant facing the excruciating consequences of your supposed relaxation time.

"I can't feel my legs at all. Was I out for long?"

"Not that long. I had just enough time to carry you there and run for a few things, like a transformation potion, because those bumpkins got so excited they turned to their original form."

"I genuinely don't know how that happened. [Name], I'm deeply sorry."

Azul's remorseful voice drew your attention to him and Floyd standing near the door, in their human forms, already dressed in their uniforms. Jade was wiping your body with wet cloth in the meantime, carefully inspecting your body for marks and other "love confessions".

"You have nothing to feel sorry about, I enjoyed it very much. But it seems I won't go anywhere with you today anymore."

"Indeed, doesn't seem like [Name] will be able to visit the closing ceremony. Don't worry I'll stay here with you."

Jade addressed Azul and you in turns, gentle smile was playing on his lips. Reassuring you that you will be in caring hands the man lovingly pecked your cheek.

"Heeeeh~ You want just want some alone time with koebi-chan, don'tcha, Jade?“

Floyd who was silent before neared his brother with a mischievous grin.

"Not quite right, I surely exercise more control of myself than to prey on defenseless and fatigued [Name] like that. Not to mention, I already got my share earlier today. Motivational supplies were just the best."

Jade retorted with a wicked smile of his own, showing his razor-sharp teeth in this rare instance. His twin could only blink in confusion, not ready for such a twist.

"So you were ahead of us this whole time, Jade? It's also quite unexpected from you, my dear [Name], but I'm not in the position to complain. Please rest up and restore your power, we'll go and come back."

Azul came close to you and placed a soft kiss on your forehead.

"Love you very much."

He added in a quiet voice before he left the room to prepare for the last event of the day. Before Floyd could follow him out, he ran up to you to briskly kiss you on the lips and say his own goodbye:

"Koebi-chan is always so fun to play with, it's too hard to stop sometimes. Be a good little one and relax. Don't get lonely, I'll come soon, 'kay?~"

Bathing headcanons(SFW/slightly NSFW)

Azul Ashengrotto 🐙

• Very diligent about his bathing and grooming routine, Azul takes shower at least once a day. To be a successful businessman one needs to take care of himself and his looks and the dorm leader doesn't slack off on it. Not to mention, he loves water and misses the ocean and how freely he could move in it. The land's shower is just a small gateway to dull his nostalgia.

• His personal care products mostly smell of some fruit or flower. It's the type of smell that makes you want to just inhale it over and over, maybe just nibble on his skin a bit, flustering poor octopi.

• Maybe sweet smells don't exactly tie in with the image of the powerful, all-mighty magician he works hard to uphold, but practice shows different results. He smells pleasant, relaxing, like somebody who you would gladly entrust your unique magic or valuable possession. How can a guy with such a sincere smile and the air of the flower field in spring around him be threatening? Azul may have lost all of his contracts, but he steadily grows his collection anew, more determined than ever.

• It takes him a lifetime to confess that he wants to shower with you, much faster is just to invite him yourself. You can sense just how eager he is, but the thought of you seeing him naked, and vice versa makes him too shy. Just grab him and take with you, he won't protest much. He helps you to wash your back and hair, loving every second of it. And when you rub him back and massage his body, any and every insecure thought just evaporates, leaving only raw and vulnerable Azul starved for tender touches and appreciative words. When you stay with him, Azul always subtly suggests having a shower together, blushing profusely each and every time. He doesn't even think about doing anything sexual, just washing each other is already intimate enough practice for him.

• He took a habit to always rub and massage your back, be it in the bath or shower, he too finds enjoyment, especially when he hears you sigh in approval or relax into him. Azul would love to receive the same gentle treatment but to his head. With the amount of mental work he does daily he's not a stranger to migraines anymore. But somehow, when when you rub and massage his scalp the annoying pain goes away. He jokingly complains that you've never told him you could use a magic like that, but he's grateful nonetheless.

• Baths are a whole event for him. He's the type to place aroma candles everywhere, throw in a beautiful bath bomb and bring a glass of his preferred drink. And you, of course, his dear lover. Now everything is set for the perfect evening with you, his most favorite person, by his side.

•❗ No action in water unless it's a big enough place for you to safely attempt anything in there. And definitely not the shower, not in a lifetime. He's not strong enough to support you, and he's still adjusting to walking on legs. And it's much more exciting to tease him until he practically begs you to take him right away, only to make him wait for when you're out of dangerous grounds of the shower.

Jade Leech 🐬

• Not as disciplined as his dorm's leader, Jade still makes sure to take a shower once every few days, he has to look presentable and smart as a vice dorm leader himself.

• He smells like the sea breath, very fresh and subtle, not enough to make him stand out, but special enough to understand that this guy is not an ordinary one.

• it's somewhat of his fantasy to take a shower with you. You and water? The perfect combination. It would be a one morning when you stayed at his room, that Jade would tell you, blushing, that he was going to shower and wouldn't mind if you joined him. He would go ahead, not really hoping that you will follow him until he feels a kiss on his shoulder and hands enveloping. Didn't take him too long to understand who just decided to join him, Jade smiling happily at that.

• He wants to wash you, take care of your every body part. If you insist that you can do it yourself or shy away from him he'll tease you and still continue to do his thing. He pampers you to the fullest, just about everything is taken care of. He loves to feel your skin, to see how water streams down your body. If you two are in a rush, Jade won't relent, but he'll be grateful if you wash him in return.

• Baths are also nice in Jade's mind, but he'll take one exclusively if he is exhausted or is promised to have you with him in it. It'll take some bending and working around with it, this man is too tall for most baths. He'll casually hug you while you two relax and enjoy each other's company.

•❗He's pretty open to bathtub sex, Jade thinks that your wet, flushed body is one of the most erotic sights he's ever seen. There he was, thinking you couldn't get even hotter, but he can't keep his hands off of you now, please take responsibility. Still not safe to fool around in the shower, but at least you tried. It wasn't half bad, but Jade confessed later that it was too stressing - he's not willing to risk your health like that anymore.

Floyd Leech 🦈

• He's like a small child when it comes to bathing. It's too bothersome, he doesn't stink, what's the problem. It's a damn war, when Jade tries to stick him in a shower or a bathtub, because a certain furious octopus, hard bend on self-grooming, ordered to have Floyd showered one way or another. The catch is, as soon as he's in water, he's the calmest angel ever. He'll spend there as much time as his human body allows him. Generally, it's twice a week, but he goes to shower willingly after each PE class, he hates the stench of sweat even more.

• He doesn't smell like anything, at best you can smell a candy he ate just recently. He despises strong smells. If he's forced to shower with such shower gel or shampoo he'll be furious and snappy the whole time until it wears off. If he can smell it, it's bad and makes his skin crawl, annoying him to no end. He feels like biting himself, and he doesn't like it. On you, however, he prefers tasty, yummy smells, since he can take a bite no problem.

• The one who accidentally buys a juice-like bottle of some gel and gets a poisoning. "But it looked so edible~", he's banned by Jade and Azul now from any sections of the store, where there can be any chemicals in "misleading" covers.

• Actually baths are his favorite! Cue him clinging to you and just freeze there. He's enjoying it so much. At best you just sit there in his embrace, until the water becomes too cold for his liking, but other times he reverts back to his merman appearance and now he's all over you and you can't breathe properly. He's not oblivious thought, when he deems that he's teased you enough he'll release you. Your reactions are just the best, he can't get enough of them.

• One time he slipped into your shower and just grabbed a handful of your tight and thought it was the funniest thing ever, while you nearly went into cardiac arrest when somebody in all-boys dorm touched you out of nowhere. But who else could have it been, if not your capricious boyfriend. Now, Floyd is suddenly all about going to shower each day, of course dragging you with him. He doesn't even shower, he just stands under the water and squeezes you, ultimately not giving you the chance to clean neither you nor him. It takes colossal efforts, to make him scrub his body, but he still doesn't leave your side.

• ❗By far the most dangerous to have shower sex with, but also the most exciting. Does it stop you? Mostly. Him? Never. He always looks forward to when you inevitably get frisky. Floyd will edge you till the point of crying, have you begging for him to fuck you. He also has enough strength to pick you up and ram into you, or he'll just turn you around and press himself behind setting a fast pace right away.

[nozomijoestar]

Wrote NaraTrish having fun, confessing, and comforting each other bc they’re so great as either friends or a couple

*This isn’t for nasty pedo thotties or prudish infantilizing thotties, both sides of the discourse shut up 1-2 year gap max is fine and no one should ever sexualize minors with or without adults, this is for well adjusted people who recognize teens can explore sexuality and romance without showing sex or being disgusting fetish ty 

Anyway I made like 3 Aerosmith song references if you can find them cool keep on rockin (extra bonus if you know what the allusion is at the final paragraph and line) also bisexual hc for both

"Your hands are a lot bigger than mine. That's friggin unfair. I'm a guy!" Trish giggled yet the only irritation he felt aimed at himself. He knew why that was. How he once scrounged a year eating trash; no home or bed and the eyes of wolves reflected in anyone else. When he would tell her however remained uncertain. It brought only shame. "Narancia there's nothing wrong with that. Look, you're covered with callouses. I'd never get one in a million years." She smiled and separated their hands to trace along his. Her finger ran along his lifeline; a patch of skin on his left palm mangled by scars. He didn't know what quick thing he should say. His boyish eyes were too dazzled by how smooth she was by comparison. How nice she smelled. The way he carried himself just didn't cut it. But now wasn't the time to think, Trish was speaking. "If you're worried about looking manly I think you're already there. Halfway at least." Narancia groaned and hung his head. The bravado he clung to deflated. She touched their foreheads. Their hands returned to their laps. No hesitation bothered Trish when she stroked his cheek. He moved to rest his head against her shoulder. "You really think I'm doing a good job Trish? This whole thing, this fuckin mess...Your life in danger...Your asshole dad-" "I said before to all of you. Even if I have to die by the end; I won't meet it without knowing who I came from. I'll see this through never running away." She felt him sigh and lean against her. She'd flooded confidence into what she said. It was conviction. Not just because she believed it, or because facing one's problems defined responsibility. Courage propelled Narancia forward; eased past his turbulent indecisiveness whenever he wasn't under threat. Buccellati breathed such a thing as if it were life energy. Without her full awareness that will had a hand in shaping her, when exactly she couldn't say. To think the same man she might regard as a true father often disregarded Narancia being wounded short of death- that gnawed at her. To Trish, risking his life being part of the job didn't justify some callousness. Whether she loved Narancia as a man or a comrade he mattered beyond being ordered. When she realized he'd gone awfully quiet she embraced him. He was so small despite being an inch taller. A minute passed before anything came from him. "I was so scared. Following everyone- I was so so scared. Buccellati's never been wrong; but when I had to make up my own mind I froze. That's awful...I owe him everything but I froze. Why couldn't I just be ready to die for him and come along to begin with?" She pet his hair and leaned against him closing her eyes. He felt coarse, even a bit sweaty. No one could remember the last time they'd taken consistent showers. Yet the longer she felt his heart in silence the more she didn't care. Only he could do that. Of the talkative bunch Mista was a friend; but his fault lay in the ways he bore himself down. Asserted himself a bit too intensely. Narancia had been different from the start. Thus by her book he got away with less. Most importantly he was the easiest to talk to. He could be loud and quick tempered at insults- then soft spoken the moment he grew unsure in himself, or unsure at saying the right thing on his mind. Even if he didn't always understand, he knew how to consider what others suffered. Not once could Trish remember him speaking to her knowingly with ill intent. So she held him thinking, grasping in her mind for any smart sounding solutions. Anything Buccellati might say as much as it annoyed her to admit it. Ultimately that proved fruitless. No one else but Buccellati could be him after all. Instead she said, "No one is glad to die Narancia." He tensed up. Trish pulled back and looked him in the eyes; spoke directly to his heart. "No one's glad to die even if they say they are. They'll hate it right to the moment it happens. I think you were right to hesitate. That's not an easy choice." "Hmm...if you say so. Giorno gave me hope what I chose was right y'know; he's that kinda guy. I gotta figure out how to do that for me. And I guess also...the stuff you said about not giving up on finding things out..." Narancia fiddled with his hands. Mussed his hair. Buying this much time to think in conversation set off Trish's suspicions. She raised an eyebrow; that was her tell. "I thought you were a lot like me. But you don't just do things on whims, so I guess not. Sorry." The room inside the turtle grew quiet only for a pause. Trish broke it with a laugh light as air. Immediately Narancia's grim mood was wiped away by a panic. He spoke as she kept laughing. "Did I say something dumb?" Trish wiped a tear from her eye and fell calm. She had such control of her emotions sometimes he could always tell where one had stopped and the other began. Emotion through his mind took on the unguided frenzy of a storm. The idea of control, like obeying authority he didn't choose, slid off him no better than oil on water. "No no Narancia just silly. You can empathize with someone without being them." "Empathize? What's that mean?" "Means you can understand what someone feels. You understand it and share it. Usually if you've gone through similar things." "My mom died when I was younger and my dad could care less about me too. That's why I emp...empi-" "Em-pa-thigh-ze." "Yeah that. Empathize." "That's alright Narancia I get it." She wouldn't press him for more. That would come in his own time on his own terms. Not knowing everything didn't make the pang in her heart less real. "Dads suck huh?" They laughed. They didn't know if it was to mask hurt or dry humor or both. Though it felt sudden but certainly wasn't, now Trish wanted anything to change the mood. She stood up and Narancia's eyes followed in constant interest. No one needed to say anything for him to mimic her. "I never showed you my Stand did I? You were injured." In an instant every feature of Narancia's face glowed excitement. He made exaggerated gestures and talked almost twice as fast. The others could find it annoying or immature but she saw endearing. "You didn't you have to show me! What's its name? Lemme see lemme see!" "Settle down Narancia I'm not going anywhere." Trish stood still and shut her eyes. She breathed a deep breath. Her concentration would've faltered if it weren't his eyes watching. A trick she's formed was to focus on an idea of her father. How she'd hit him back. The rest came easy. "Spice Girl." A feeling on her skin like a buzz when you come close to an electric current swept over her. Behind her, from her a shimmering humanoid figure emerged. Despite all the attention it took to summon Spice Girl appeared in an instant. It matched her height and build; that was where the similarities ended. It's skin was pinks and reds and rare whites. The eyes were catty and yellow; all emotion reserved to observe the world. Symbols marked its head, kneecaps, and shoulders. Though he never finished elementary school Narancia thanked Fugo for learning to recognize them. They were equation markers. Addition and division. Something akin to a tunic with narrow rectangular gaps covered its chest. A tiny skirt resembling a Centurion's at the end of that hid the groin. It said nothing yet stared at him; peered into him as if seeing not his body but Aerosmith. Trish opened her eyes; shifted from looking lovingly up at her Stand to enthralled Narancia. His naturally big eyes gave him the wonder of a child. That she always found cute. What hitched her breath came seeing the gentle fascination, the pride for someone else, the way he stared as though it were the only thing he'd find tender. She moved to walk closer toward him and found him doing the same. He remained entranced until they gently collided. Finally his eyes fell on her again; their sweet emotion unchanged. In one of those rare contemplative moments he spoke soft but genuine. Forever genuine. He didn't know any other way to be. "It's really nice Trish. Way cooler than Aerosmith. It looks like it always knows what to do; that's you all the way. Looks strong." Suddenly her face grew red hot; her first blush not from embarrassment. If Narancia noticed he didn't say it, but he probably had. "What can it do?" "It makes anything softer. Like rubber. And that-" She rose her hand and clenched it the way Spice Girl had done at its awakening. "Makes them stronger than diamonds." Spice Girl punched the floor in a blink. The rug beneath them stretched like gum. Narancia stares down trembling ever so slightly. The fabric had appeared to melt into a reflective puddle. Shifting his feet produced a rubbery squish. It consumed him faster than quicksand. Before they could sink knee deep as the ground gave way, it was undone. He sighed and caught his breath. Little by little his composure returned. Though he would never be endangered at her hand such strength made anyone nervous. Spice Girl returned within Trish. They were within arms length. "Pretty crazy huh? I'd never have believed it till it appeared." Narancia nodded dumbly. When she took his hands again he swallowed hard; looked her head on. He had a knack for reading into anything if he applied himself. Right now it washed away under the racing of his heart. There was an energy to her expression he'd never seen on anyone. A look he once imagined Fugo might wear. His body tingled. Trish spoke uncharacteristically sheepish. Paused in places where he thought she'd be firm. Her thumbs brushed along his and it gave him a chill. He didn't want to pull back. The last bits of his rationale struggled to give answers. Was she sick? Did she need to lie down? More importantly how much longer did they have alone? What would he tell the guys? Buccellati? "Narancia I...uh well...this might be weird but- have you ever kissed someone?" A pause. His memory skipped in disbelief. "W-What?" "Kissed someone. Anyone. On the mouth." "Like how my parents used to?" Trish laughed into a sigh. "Yeah like that." Narancia scrambled to undo the burned out engine his thoughts became. He was growing way too hot. Hot the way he sometimes did dreaming of Fugo, or some magazine model, or...Trish. Those nights he'd wake up covered in sweat and dazed. The feeling crashed its way into the present faster than a plane. He couldn't meet her eyes. "No. You'll probably say it's weird but I used to...imagine that with Fugo. N-Not all the time! It would just happen and I couldn't do anything about it." "Oh? Really?" "Yeah. It's stupid cuz guys are supposed to think about girls. And that kind of stuff with them..." If he were looking he'd see some of Trish's fire dampen. She didn't let it reach her voice. "Do you still think of him that way?" "No! N-No...not since he left. I mean I can get why but, he abandoned us when we needed him." His eyes flit to her again. "When you needed him. It's made me real confused; angry too I guess." "Well it's not weird. Not to me. Don't tell anyone but sometimes I've thought of girls too and-" Trish grew fully red in the face again. Even she couldn't finish that sentence. Narancia gasped; his expression lit up with something not painful. "So you get it then! I thought I was the only one. Boys and girls...I don't think I care which." "Right? I don't think I could choose either. But my real question is-" She leaned closer letting him hear her heart through her pulse. He didn't need Aerosmith to tell her breathing went fluttery. It made him want to lean in. "Have you ever wanted to kiss me?" Wordlessly he held her. The spinning indecisiveness that had him tail diving righted itself. He stared at her with his mind made. The tiny gasp she gave at the move solidified his resolve. This wasn't a dream. "You should've just asked me that in the first place." "Eh? So you-" "To be honest I thought you'd never ask or do anything. I'm not the brightest guy at this stuff." "Sorry..." "It's alright." "Really?" "Yeah." Their faces were a hairsbreadth apart. "Ah-" Their eyes shut at the brush of their lips. Neither needed direction or would've taken any from anyone but themselves. He felt Trish wrap her arms around his neck; pressed all of herself against him the way he did her. Slowly she pulled him down with her fingers in his hair. Kissed him stronger when they knelt in sync. The feel of his touch along her jaw electrified them both. Affectionately he brushed her hair behind her ear. No longer than seconds passed each time they separated into another kiss; shallow  or meaningful. One after another. The thought of being caught with one look into the turtle from above meant nothing to their roaring hearts. How long it'd been before they separated they didn't know. They sighed against each other. Trish was the first to smile; to giggle in that mystical way Narancia couldn't explain but felt. He kissed her forehead; hated to let go. "Trish I lov-" She put a finger to his lips. "You've already said it for now. Just hold me. I wanna know you're really here." "Ok...ok." They laid on the rug embracing all the while. When she leaned against his chest and tickled his neck at each breath- that was a home. A place only they had. She tilted his chin and he gave it gladly; blushed at the kiss on his nose. At this distance he felt her heart through his. He rested his cheek atop Trish's hair. "Are people always this warm so close?" She asked. "I dunno. Never checked." "I guess we found out anyway." He heard the sleepiness in her voice. She grew heavier against him; relaxed into his shape. He looked down to find her eyes closed. Trish wrapped her arm tighter around his waist. He returned the favor as she slept. Narancia felt himself tire. Trish was the warmest heat he'd ever known. It could rage for him like a furnace one moment, then be gentler than sunlight. He blinked hard and fast. Never took his gaze off Trish. To hell if he was tired. He didn't want to miss a moment. Never one to deny his impulses he kissed her eyes. She made a soft noise against him. Like dusk to dawn the present became the past. The need to rest his body weighed upon him began to win. Before he could drift away his mind showed him a fleeting image. He was alone again. Damp and dirty and his bandaged eye burning. Two years ago that kind of night blended into the next without end. He'd clutch his only blanket tight; his only comfort against death or cold or despair. Narancia glanced at Trish a final time. The helpless boy of then rested into the arms of his blanket, his safety. He'd never slept so soundly.

[peachessashaven]

Heaven - Ben Hardy x Reader (Smut)

Synopsis: You and Ben have been friends since High School. When a friend from Primary School shows up many years later, will Ben be able to keep his feelings in check, or will his jealousy peek through?

Warnings: swearing and terribly written smut im so fuckin sorry sksksk

A/N: *this is reposted bc i hated the way it looked on the app on the phone AHAH* hi yes, im back, kinda, thank you for all the love on sucker!! i appreciate it all!! ❤ anywho get ready to need to burn your eyeballs because of this piece of sh i e t im so sorry also hasnt been spell checked or re edited bc i hate reading my work back i always send it to my friend and she says its good (i feel as if she has to say thay but ok AHAHAH) anywho enj o y???

Word Count: 5.5k (tf is wrong with me???)

You’d heard a knock on the door of your flat, the flat you share with Ben. You furrow your eyebrows, confused as to why someone might be here. You sit on the couch for a few more seconds before you hear another hurried knock.

“Are you going to get that?” Ben yelled from his bedroom. You sighed and lifted the warm woolen blanket, slipping on your slippers. You were wearing one of Ben’s old hoodies and a pair of pyjama pants.

“Yeah, fine! I’ll get up from the warm confines of my blanket to answer the bloody door!” You laugh, shuffling towards the door. You swing it open, the wire door covering the person standing there. “Hello?”

“Is this Y/N’s house?” You raise an eyebrow, skeptical of who would be asking for you.

“Uh, who’s asking?”

“Well, if you open the door, you’ll find out.” You warily open the wire door, slamming it open when you realise who it was.

“Hayden?” You scream, confusion and shock clear all over your face. Hayden was your best friend in primary school - he’d moved away in grade five, his mum had gotten a better job opportunity to benefit everyone in his family. This was the first time you’d seen him over 15 years.

“Hi, Y/N, long time no see!” He says with a laugh, opening his arms for a hug. You comply and run into his arms, crashing into his grasp. “How are you, little one?”

“Oh my god, it’s been so long! How did you know where I live?”

“Well, your mum hasn’t moved out of your old family house, so I went there first and your mum directed me here. Your mum hasn’t changed a bit - it seems you haven’t either!”

“Who’s at the door?” You hear a voice behind you, Ben rugged up in a hoodie and trackies. This winter weather wasn’t going well for either of you it seemed. He walked up to you and placed his arm around your shoulder, pulling you close.

“Ben! This is one of my old best friends from primary school, Hayden! Hayden, this is my now best friend Ben!” You introduce the two, Ben warily shaking the man's hand.

“Nice to meet you, Ben!” Hayden enthusiastically shakes Ben’s hand, “I hear you’ve been treating our Y/N right? That’s that your mum said.”

“Yeah, I guess.” Ben stares at Hayden with a weird look, almost as if he was glaring at him. His hold on you doesn’t falter, you place your hand on his. You look at him with confusion, shake your head slightly and glance back at Hayden. He doesn’t seem to notice the weird looks.

“You talked to my mum? What did she say when she saw you?”

“She looked back at me and said ‘There is no way you’re that little boy I remember’ I laughed and had to try to prove it to her!” Ben still looks quite uncomfortable standing there, one arm around you. His hand slides across the back of your neck and down your arm he then walks out of the lounge room and into the kitchen, hearing pots and pans clanging around. You shiver slightly at the movement, feeling lost without his touch.

“How?”

“The nickname I used to call you, ‘Funny Bunny’” He smirks at you, seeing the look of horror on your face.

“Oh my god, I haven’t heard that in years,” You let out a big grin, “I can’t believe you remember that!”

“Why wouldn’t I?”

You and Hayden continue to chat, leading him into the lounge room and out of the cold. You talk about what he did when he was away, how his family was going and how he’d finally found love in his life. You’d talked about how you’d met Ben in high school, how finishing high school was like and what life afterwards has been like.

After about an hour of talking, Hayden decided it was a good idea to leave - but not before asking you to come to the housewarming party he was having to celebrate him coming home.

“Is it okay if Ben comes along? Maybe he can get drunk enough and tell me whats wrong,” you ask, chuckling slightly.

“Yeah, of course, the more the merrier!” He seems genuinely happy to have him come along, “it’s been so great to see you, Y/N, I’ll see you both tomorrow night?”

“Sure will, thank you for visiting! Again, sorry about my clothes, didn’t realise I’d have any visitors,” you gesture towards your pyjama pants.

“That hoodie does not seem like something you’d wear,” He furrows his brows but with a knowing look. You hit his shoulder slightly.

“Shh,” you giggle, “It’s Ben’s, it’s roomy and comfy enough for a winter’s day!”

“Alright then, I’ll see you guys tomorrow!” He throws you into a large hug, shaking you around the whole time. “Goodbye Ben!” Hayden yells out, and beginning to leave, not expecting an answer. You hear Ben let out a ‘bye’, but not coming out to see him.

You wave once more to him and close the door, letting out a happy sigh. It’s great to be able to catch up with old friends, especially ones who made an impact in your life. You raise yourself from the door and walk to Ben’s room, where he’s sitting cross legged on his queen sized mattress, on his phone.

“Why are you in a grumpy mood?” You ask, knocking on the door. He looks up from his phone with a plain look on his face.

“I don’t know what you mean,” he says blatantly. You give him a pointed look, clearly seeing through his bullshit.

“Ben, you’re grumpy and I can tell,” You walk towards his bed and sit down next to him, pushing his shoulder with your shoulder. “C’mon, dude, you can talk to me.”

“There’s nothing to talk about, I’m not grumpy,” his eyes wander to yours, then slowly drifting down your body. “Is that my hoodie?”

“Maybe, it’s cold as hell and you have so many. I only have one, and it’s in the wash.” You play with the fur-like lining of your slipper, sighing as you lay down on his bed. You can’t lie, it’s a much more comfy bed than yours, you’d considered swapping it with yours when he was away filming. “So, we’re going to Hayden’s housewarming party tomorrow night.” He groans really loudly, falling back on the bed next to you.

“Why are we doing that?”

“Because he’s been my best friend since primary school, and I haven’t seen him in like 15 years.” You point out, turning your body so you’re on your side, staring at Ben. You watched his face go through so many emotions in the span of 3 seconds.

You sit there for a few more seconds, noting how his eyes scrunch up when he’s concentrating, his eyebrows furrow and he bites his lip, which, if you were standing, would make your knees give out on you.

“Fine, I’ll go.” You squeal and throw yourself over him to hug him, wrapping your arms around his neck and your legs intertwined with his. You could feel him stiffen up, but you didn’t say anything, you were too excited. You give him a sloppy kiss to his cheek, yelling thank you over and over again.

You couldn’t decide what to wear, it was still extremely cold, it only being 7 degrees Celsius outside and tonight, it was going to drop to only 4 degrees Celsius. You decide on a maroon woolen jumper with black jeans, along with black boots with a big heel. You settled on having your hair down, natural, with neutral makeup. You walked into the lounge room, grabbing your keys and purse.

“Ben, you ready?”

“I’ve been ready for the last 10 minutes, I’ve just been playing the game-” Ben trails off as he sees you, letting a small smile grow on his lips. “You look-” Ben pauses, biting his lip in concentration, “... amazing.” Your eyes flicker from his eyes to his lips and back.

“Thanks Benny,” You smile flirtily, walking to the door. “You good to go?”

“Yeah, of course,” he feels his pockets for his phone and wallet. “Lets go!”

Hayden was very welcoming to both you and Ben, Ben was even smiling at him. When you two walked in, it was like one of those high school parties you were never invited to, but found yourself at those parties because Ben dragged you there.

You didn’t want to drink, you never found the fun in it, seeing everyone literally falling over, it just never appealed to you. Ben however, grabbed one of the light beers.

“I don’t want to drink much, I’m probably not even going to finish this.” He had told you, earlier in the night, but you didn’t believe him, you knew he was going to get smashed, one way or another.

You were talking to Hayden again, laughing, smiling and reminiscing with him when you see Ben stagger into where you two were talking. He was smiling eagerly when he saw you, walking over and plopping himself down on your lap. He cuddled into your neck, whispering things that you couldn’t quite understand.

“Ben, why don’t you sit next to me?”

“Can I lay in between your legs?”

“Why not.” He stands up and pulls you to the floor. Feeling every part of your body jiggle with that one action, you begin to feel self conscious - covering up your stomach when Ben lays down.

He feels your hands where his neck is placed and pulled your arms out from where you were covering and placed his hands into them, nestling his head between your boobs. You blush from the movement, him moving his head around to get comfortable, he situates himself to have his cheek resting on your left boob.

You close your eyes and then look to Hayden. “You know what, I might get this one home, he seems out of it.” You chuckle nervously, feeling the rumbling of Ben’s resisting groans.

“Don’t want to go home yet.” He closes his eyes and lets out a sigh. You look at Hayden with an apologetic gaze.

“C’mon, Sweet, you’re done for, you gotta get home and rest, otherwise the hangover you’ll have will be astronomical.”

“I need to pee first,” he says slowly standing up. He holds his hands out for you to stand up with him. You sigh, rolling your eyes playfully, grabbing his warm hands to pull yourself up. He continues to hold your right hand as he finds the toilet. He pulls you in, locking the door afterwards.

“Ben, what are you doing?” You laugh. He turns around, his bright eyes turned dark, with an almost smug look on his face. You stop laughing when you see his eyes glide down your body. “Ben-” he cuts you off with one finger pressed to your lips. You gasp slightly at the action, you slowly walk back until you hit the sink, Ben stalking his way towards you.

“You seem to be having fun with Hayden, huh?” he asks, standing in front of you, looking down at you with an all new look on his face, one you’d never seen before.

“Ben, you’re drunk, what are you doing?” You mutter, clenching your legs slightly - the look in his eyes really did something to you.

“I barely drank that beer, I told you that,” he says. You place your hands on his cheeks, your eyes searching his for any sign of intoxication. You didn’t see any sign that he’d been drinking, no sign like you’d seen in previous situations.

This isn’t the first time he’s done something like this, he’s gotten jealous when another man would talk to you at a party, when you and Ben got home, he’d ask you the same questions, but in a drunken manner. You never told him it had happened before, you thought it’d make the friendship you two had awkward.

This time he wasn’t drunk, he was sober, alert, he knew what he was doing, and he seemed to know what he was doing to you too, looking at the way your legs were situated.

“Then- why- what?” You splutter, not knowing what to take from this conversation. “You looked so drunk before, what the hell was that?”

“I’m an actor, babe,” his finger pushes a stray hair behind your ear, caressing your face. He placed his palm on your cheek, his thumb rubbing calming circles.

“A bloody good one, you are,” you agree, getting lost in the eyes that seemed to get darker by the second. “What’s happening?” You whisper, leaning into his touch.

“Well, I’m just wondering why you haven’t tried to hook up with Hayden yet, you two seem to be having a lot of fun.” There’s fiery look in his eyes.

“Is that all you’re worried about?” You furrow your eyebrows, confused.

“You two are becoming close again, I can tell,” he mutters, his hand still on your cheek, his other hand slowly creeping up to your waist. “Soon, it’ll be ‘Y/N and Hayden’ and I don’t know if I can share you like that.”

“Are you jealous?”

“If that's what you want to call this, then maybe.” He says, sarcasm seething from his teeth like venom. You chuckle slightly, bringing one of your hands to the back of his neck, and the other sliding down his neck and resting on his chest.

“Sweetheart,” You begin, rubbing his neck, feeling the short hair between your fingers, you grip the hair slightly. He closes his eyes temporarily, mouth dropping. “You have nothing to worry about with Hayden,” you continue, sliding your hand lower towards his abs, hooking onto his jeans, fiddling with the belt. You bring his head down, your lips finding their way to his ear. You let out a slow and shaky breath as you whisper the rest of your sentence, “He’s gay.”

You pull away and begin to walk to the door, letting out small laughs. You begin to open the door as Ben stands there for a few seconds, he quickly snaps out of his trance. He closes the door before you can walk out, pushes you against it. You let out another gasp, he moves his head closer to yours.

“What?” He questions, placing his forehead on yours.

“That man he was with? His fiancé, you dipshit,” you giggle, placing your hand on his cheek once again.

“Oh, so I didn't need to stake my claim?” He asks, his voice getting lower and more seductive. You almost moan at the sentence, feeling heat all throughout your body at how close he was getting.

“Why would you need to stake your claim? If you wanted me to be yours, you should’ve just asked.”

“Oh, Love,” his voice is raspy and to you, it's so hot, his lips get closer and closer to yours, “so I can kiss you?” You don’t answer him, you just close the gap between the two of you. Teeth clashing, bitten lips and small breathy moans were all you could think of, Ben brought his hips closer to yours, pressing into each other.

You thought your first kiss with Ben would be simple and sweet, one night where you two were slightly drunk and you’d both wonder what it’d be like to kiss each other.

You’d hope something would stem from there. But if you told 17 year old you, that’d you be making out with Ben Hardy in the bathroom of an old friends house in the future, your past self would slap you and accuse you of lying, and then she’d tell you to stop playing with her feelings. You’d never thought this amount of passion could be thrown into a kiss, a fiery, jealousy and lust driven kiss.

Ben allows his lips to travel down to your jaw, leaving wet kisses trailing to your neck and collarbone that was exposed from your jumper. One of his hands grazed down your body and landed on your ass, squeezing slightly, his other hand still placed on your waist. You let out a moan as Ben found a sweet spot, sucking and making little noises, making a trail of marks as he brings his lips to the bottom of your ear. You grab his hair and scrunch your fingers in the perfectly placed heap, letting out louder noises - not caring if other people could hear you. Your other hand trailing down his chest again, stopping at his belt.

“If you keep making those noises and keep pulling my hair, Sweetheart, I won’t be able to stop myself.” He lifts his head from your neck, you let out a single laugh and pull him back to your lips, a kiss that's slower, sweeter, one that is filled with love and want. “As much as I’d love to take you in this bathroom, I’d rather finish this at home, where we can be as loud as we want.” Ben smirks, his lips are plump from the searing kisses, his face is red and he’s letting out small and laboured breaths. You nod, giving him one last kiss and pulling away, walking out of the bathroom. Ben gives a little smack to your ass, causing you to squeal slightly.

“Jeez, Y/N, you look fucked out, what happened in there?” Hayden lets out a laugh as he holds on to his fiancé. “And what happened to your neck? You look like you burnt yourself with a curling iron!”

“No time to explain, I’ve got to go, thank you for having Ben and I, we’ll come visit soon!” You hug him quickly and the man hanging onto him.

“I can see, have fun you two, wear protection!” Hayden yells out, as you stick the finger up at him, giggling. Ben joins your side, putting his arms around your waist, picking you up. You let out another scream and slap at his back.

“Put me down!” You laugh. He shakes his head and gives another slap to your ass. “Boy, if you don’t-”

“I’ll be driving, sweet,” He grabs your keys from your back pocket and puts you down as he arrives to your car.

“Are you sure you’ll be able to contain yourself?” You laugh, crossing your arms. You can see him straining against his pants, he isn’t exactly great at hiding it. He pulls your arms out from where they are and pins you against the car, the same position as before, but this time, his hands pinning yours to the car. You let out an impatient groan, “You know, the faster we get in the car, the longer we’ll have at home,” you whisper seductively, biting your lip as he also lets out an impatient groan.

“Good point, c’mon, lets go!”

Almost crashing through the front door of your flat, he pushed you against the closed door once again. He stares at you for a few seconds, you break the silence.

“How many times have you pushed me against a door tonight?” You gaze up, looking into his desperate eyes, letting out small laughs.

“Not nearly enough times,” He groans, pressing his lips to yours, hungrier and needier than before. “I’m making up for lost time, if I’m being honest.” His fingers tap the backs of your thighs, making you jump and joined your legs around his waist. “All those times I’d accidentally see you come out of the shower in just your underwear,” He’d began to trail the kisses to your cheek, “Those times where we’d be sitting on the couch and you’d take your bra off through your shirt because it’d been uncomfortable,” He lastly leant into your neck, kissing once then bringing his lips right next to your ear, “And those time’s I’d hear you moan my name in your sleep.” You blush a bright scarlet red, your mouth agape.

“I’d do that? I mean, I knew I did it while conscious, but not while I’m asleep,” He let out a guttural groan, his eyes almost rolling back.

“Oh my fuck, yes, sweetheart, it took me so much self control to not just walk into your room and eat you out, then and there.” His voice was low, husky and delicious. “It’s taking me a lot more to not just fuck you right here and now,” The sleeves of the jumper you were wearing covered your hands as you wrapped your arms around his neck, bringing him closer.

“I mean you could-” you trail off.

He smirks as he begins to walk to the hallway. “My room or yours?”

“Your bed is so much comfier than mine, it’ll feel much better on yours.”

“You think?” He asks with a smirk, you nod eagerly, with a grin growing on your face. He leads you to his bed, essentially throwing you onto the bed, your hands grasping at the multiple blankets covering his bed.

“So this is where they went?” You look at them then back to Ben, “I was looking for another one of these last night.”

“Oh well, you don’t have to worry about that tonight then,” Ben hops onto the bed, crawling over to you, pulling your legs apart to settle himself in between them. His lips latch onto yours again, moving slower and deeper, his hands placed next to your head.

You wrap your arms around his torso, scratching at his back, wanting his shirt gone. You must’ve scratched a little too hard as he pulled away and moaned. You pull at it from the back, throwing it in a random direction. You marvel at the chest before you, running your fingers along his pecs and abs, you almost drooled at the sight. You pulled at his belt buckle, ripping it off in one swift motion.

“These, off, now,” You muttered, urgency in your voice. Ben smirked and stood up from the bed, pulling his pants down, slowly and it was agonisingly painful. He left his boxers on as he crawls back up to you.

“You sure you want to do this, Sweetheart?” He asked, concern filling his face. You nod, not being able to trust your voice. “No, Love, I need verbal consent-” You grab his cheeks and kiss his lips hard.

“Yes, I want this, I want you, I want you in me, now.” Muttering against his lips, he almost growls, pulling at the end of your shirt, almost asking for permission to take it off. You groan and take it off yourself. You’re left in a lacy bra that barely held your boobs in because of how tight it was on you. You weren’t going to lie, it was extremely uncomfortable to wear, but it made you feel pretty. Ben licked his lips slightly at the sight. “Do you want to take it off, or should I?”

“Are you kidding? I’ve been wanting to do this for forever,” You smile as he brings his hands to the back of the bra, unclasping it with expert speed. You sigh in relief as the bra is finally off of your chest, but feeling suddenly self conscious (and cold, as soon as the cold air hit your nipples they turned as solid as fucking icicles), you fold your arms against your chest. “My sweet Y/N, you’re perfectly beautiful the way you are, you have no need to cover up.”

“No, you fuck, it’s fucking cold in here, why isn’t the heater on?” You shiver. Ben jumps off from the bed.

“I’ll put it on, I’ll be back.” Ben runs out of the room, leaving you by yourself to contemplate what to do next. You decide to pull off your jeans and underwear, and bringing yourself under the numerous amounts of blankets on Ben’s bed, it’s almost silly how many there were. Ben comes back and begins to rattle in the bottom of his draw.

“What’re you doing?” You ask, holding the blankets to your chest. He pulls out the square foil packaging, holding it between his fingers.

“This is essential isn’t it?”

“I am on birth control.” You mutter, feeling slightly embarrassed. “And as long as you’ve had an STI test, we can go without it.”

“Since when are you on the pill? I don’t see you take medication, or even go to the doctors for it.” Ben is genuinely confused, “But ever since I’ve moved in here with you, I haven’t had sex with another girl, I have had a test though, and nothing came back positive.” You smirk, beginning to tell him what birth control you were on, but he cut you off. “I can grab the test, if you’d like?”

“No no, Love, I believe you. I’ve got the IUD, I’m not on the pill.”

“IUD?”

“Don’t worry about it, it’s just a thing that gets put in my uterus- Just drop the condom, come here and fuck me already?” Ben is almost giddy when those words leave your mouth. He quickly gets under the covers to see you don’t have your underwear on either.

“Oh, I’m not fucking you tonight, I’m making long and hard love to you, all night long,” He brings his lips to yours, moving against them as he palms at your boobs. He places a hand at your entrance, swiping back and forth between your folds. “So wet for me, darling,” he pushes one finger in. “So easy to push in, huh?” His finger pulls out, you whimper, needing more. He pushes his finger in his mouth, sucking the juices off the digit.

You moan with his words and actions, feeling blissed out. You push your hand into his boxers, feeling his length in your hand. He lets out a guttural groan, pulling off his boxers completely.

“Are you sure this is still okay?” You groan, getting impatient as you position his length to your entrance. A smirk finds its way onto your lips.

“Does it look like I’m okay with it?” Ben doesn’t answer for a few seconds, staring at your eyes.

He lets out a small ‘yes’ with a laugh and pushes himself in until he bottoms out. Your mouth is in a constant ‘o’ state, not having sex for a while, you forgotten what it felt to be completely filled out. You claw at the back of Ben’s back, knowing full well that it’ll leave marks tomorrow. Ben stalls for a few seconds. “Are you going to move?”

“Just let me get used to this, Babe, as I said, I haven’t had sex since we moved in together, if I start moving now, I won’t be able to last long.” His eyes are honest and full of lust. Your hand finds its way to his cheek as you bring his face to yours, eyes shutting and lips falling on his, for what it seems like to be the hundredth time this night. “So what is the IUD?” Ben says, clearly distracting himself from trying not to release in you straight away. He begins to move outwards slowly, as you look at him incredulously.

“You really want to ask me about something that’s jammed in my uterus?”

“Well, I’m jammed inside your vagina, so-” You slap his chest, with a scoff that turned into a moan as Ben pushed back in. He spilt out your name as you clenched your walls against him.

“Note to self, never have sex with a friend, they’ll try to pull some jokes-” You cut yourself off by a scream of Ben’s name, as soon as he hit the right spot.

“You won’t be having sex with anyone else, beside me, darling,” Ben repeatedly hits that same spot, a string of curses and Ben’s name falling off your lips. “Sorry, but you’re mine now.”

“It’ll be only you, it’s always going to be only you.” You moan, clawing at Ben’s back again. “Shit, Ben!” His hand trails down your body, landing on the bundle of nerves between your legs. You begin to squirm.

“I heard that women don’t really get off with just vaginal penetration, so, I thought to help you along, because I’m so fucking close-” he presses down hard and wiggles his fingers, “I’d play with you a bit more.” Ben’s voice sounds absolutely delicious as he says this, you bring your hand to his hair and pull him down to kiss you to hide the moans that are constantly falling from your lips. “This is so much better than my dreams.” Your eyes rolled to the back of your head.

You pull at his hair, not hard, but just enough for him to moan once again.

“Benny, I’m so close,” you whisper in his ear, he lets out a relieved sigh.

“Thank fuck, because I’ve been holding off for a while.” He laughs, continually applying pressure to your clit, thrusting deep to hit your g-spot. “You’re almost there,” you clench your walls around him. “I can feel it, I’m so close- shit,” he releases inside you, the warmth pushing you over the edge as well. You yell out Ben’s name over and over again, pushing your nails into his shoulders leaving crescent shapes in his skin.

He pulls himself out of you, you whine at the feeling of being empty. He stands up and walks to his bathroom, grabbing a cloth and wetting it with warm water. You begin to feel everything seep out of your hole, you close your legs to try to stop the uncomfortable feeling. Ben kneels on the bed, near your legs.

“C’mon, baby, open up, gotta clean you up,” Ben places his hands on your thighs, eyes hooded, clearly tired. You felt the same, tiredly and warily opening up your legs, you felt him gently wipe at the sensitive spot, feeling him stopping and starting, then finally wiping at your thighs. He presses a kiss to each thigh, then throws his shirt away. “I’ll put that in the wash later, right now, I need to hold my girl.” He pulls you into his chest, your hands bracing the impact slightly. You snuggled into his neck, pressing a few kisses there.

You blushed at the endearment, smiling to yourself as you could finally call him yours. He could call you his. This is all that you wanted for the past few years, someone to want and someone to want you back. Your breathing began to pick up, as you planned out your next few words.

“I love you.”

“That’s a relief,” Ben chuckles, pressing a kiss to your head. “I didn’t want this to just be a friends with benefits thing.” He puts his hand into your hair, scratching lightly. “I could never do that with you, I’d fall in love every single day over and over again.”

“Thank fuck.” You breathed.

The next morning you woke up to someone cuddling into your back, spooning you. You panicked for a second, before turning your head to see the sleepy blonde’s head placed in the mass of your hair. You felt a pleasant ache between your legs, reminiscent of last night’s antics.

You pulled away, hoping not to wake him up. You grab one of Ben’s shirts from the floor, not bothering to put on underwear as the shirt almost looked like a dress on you, hitting the mid-thigh. You walk into the kitchen, putting on the kettle to set yourself a cup of black tea. You grab the sugar and place it on the bench. You walk to the fridge and grab the milk, closing it to see Ben standing there, leaning on the door frame.

“Fuck, Ben,” you gasp, holding your chest where your heart would be.

“Hmm, love the sound of that,” He mumbles, walking towards you, settling his hands on your ass. He looks puzzled, feeling around your ass - lifting the bottom of the shirt, he sees you’re not wearing underwear. He gives you a lazy smirk. “You naughty girl.” You let out a squeak as he slaps your ass.

“I couldn’t be fucked putting on underwear, plus, you can’t tell I’m not wearing any, unless you lift up my shirt like an ass.” You slap his chest lightly and walk over to the bench where your tea awaited you.

You exaggerate your hip movements, leaning on your hip as you pour the hot water in the mug. You put the tea bag in the mug and turn back around to see Ben standing there, a smile on his lips. He walks up to you and places his hands around your waist and lifts you up. You let out a squeal, looking down at Ben as he twirls you two around. He stops and puts you down, still holding onto your waist.

“I’m glad we finally figured out we loved each other, didn’t know if I could go another day without telling you.”

You place a hand on his cheek, letting your thumb rub lightly. Your lips give his a gentle kiss, not hurried and not lustful, just a kiss to let him know that you’re his.

“Sorry to tell you this, but you really won’t be able to get rid of me anymore.” You sigh, shaking your head. He looks right into your eyes, not blinking once, seriousness in both his sight and voice.

“I don’t mind that at all, being with you will be heavenly.”