#bc I’m less sad and anxious 24/7 now

[e77y]

Sometimes the crushing weight of just like. existing in the world the way I do is sooo much I can’t even cry. I just pace around and I’m like Oh Man. Why can’t I experience love and affection normally

[lipstickmarks]

Morticia Cubed

Sweet Morticia (1964) - Carolyn Jones’ morticia was the most sweet tempered and good natured version. She was gentle and peppered in “dear” and “darling” in every sentence to everyone she cared about, not just Gomez. The way she cared for her plants and kitty cat, feeding them, soothing them with words, referring to herself and gomez as mother and father. She also had anxiety!! let’s not forget!! she was constantly overthinking, espousing some statement and then immediately recanting it. Famously, while standing up and then sitting down in her chair. She said herself that she “lives in constant fear that someone is going to come along and take” gomez away from her. Morticia seems to have some insecurities which probably stem from Ophelia being the favorite and nearly marrying Gomez herself. Let’s not forget, they got very close to being married. They were already at the alter and it looked like there was no way out. Morticia doesn’t show it as outwardly as Gomez but is as madly in love with him. Seeing him almost married to someone she already felt inferior to probably traumatized her. Even though everything worked out in Tish’s favor, she probably still carries that fear. After all, she regards Gomez as handsome, romantic, dynamic, sweet, selfless, and caring. Why wouldn’t someone else come along and realize that? Also, in the episode where Morticia and Gomez have a fight, it only happened because she thought Gomez’ play-acting had truth to it. “I knew it. You do think I’m wasteful!” And she probably only thought that because it’s what she thinks of herself. The Addams’ do have a very abundant catalog of frivolous items and she might be afraid that Gomez does or will eventually resent her for it. Again, this could stem from her upbringing as the less favorable child; mother frump giving ophelia everything she wants and resenting morticia for needing anything. The poor baby 🥺 That’s also why it’s all the more lovely that Gomez is so generous with his affection and words of affirmation bc Trish probably really needs that reassurance that she is the center of his universe. As a mirrorball child, it probably means the world to her. Now, this (and their relationship in general) could be perceived as Gomez being more in love or their love not being equal but they just express themselves differently. (consider candace and jeremy from phineas and ferb. equally obsessed, just expressed in different ways) Gomez’ love language is physical touch and words of affirmation while Morticia’s is acts of service. (they both love quality time. they’re together 24/7!) Gomez makes it known to the entire world that he loves Morticia for her mind, body, and soul. and Morticia, as someone with anxiety, probably doesn’t outwardly express her love. I, myself, am an anxious introvert and I don’t vocalize a lot of things/am generally quiet and not talkative. Not being vocal doesn’t mean the love isn’t there. She loves Gomez in other ways. Like memorizing the entire catalogue of Addams, what they did, when and where they lived, and what they like???? hello, wife goals. She’s always looking out for Gomez too. When she thinks he’s lost everything, she puts everyone in the family to work including herself! When Gomez gets amnesia, she does everything in her power to jog his memory without hurting him and even had to delegate clubbing him on the head to someone else because she couldn’t bear to hurt him 🥺

Also! Morticia is a cryer! the way her lower lip quivers when something really gets to her (and the way Gomez swoops in with a worried “querida?🥺” and a comforting touch… SWOON). Very much a cancer rising.

In the same vein, Morticia is an empath. She always considers other people’s feelings, is thinking of ways to thank people who have visited the Addams house (“we ought to send them a gift, dear!”), and considering how and why someone is particularly sad, ill, upset, out of sorts, etc. and coming up with ways to fix it! Even when Gomez is overwhelmed with his love (lust) for her, she put that aside to focus on the problem at hand. At her core, she is a mother and a caretaker. She’s a gentle, caring, sensitive soul and I love her.

Sexy Morticia (1990s) - Morticia has always been a knock out but they had more room to go full sexy smokeshow with Anjelica Houston’s iteration in the 90s. 60s Morticia was always quelling Gomez’ lust with a stroke to his chin and a promise of “later” but 90s Morticia dialed up the horny to 11. She was allowed to reciprocate Gomez’ lust and vocalize her own. Her first lines were alluding to the wild, crazy, demonic, hedonistic sex she and gomez had the night before and how she wants her black blown out like that again! She has more of a commitment to the dark arts, as was the trend at the time with grunge. Her makeup, wardrobe, and general appearance leaned more into the femme fatale and thus, she became every 90s kid’s sexual awakening. Long Live Anjelica Houston.

Stern Morticia (2019) - I have such a soft spot for the animated movies. They do have their issues as a lot of the jokes were purely made to pander to a modern audience (squad goals, billie eilish, etc). but they’re not without their merit. Casting Oscar Isaac as Gomez Addams was a stroke of brilliance. Now that being said, this is my least favorite version of Morticia. She’s much more stern, with Gomez, with the kids, with grandmama. She very much wanted things a certain way and was upset when the status quo was changing (i.e. wednesday wanting to go outside or go to school) it just came off as controlling. The writers took Gomez and Morticia (a passionate, indulgent husband and a caring, seductive wife) and watered them down into head in the clouds x no nonsense. It was upsetting to see.

[marshmallowprotection]

Hello, maybe you coukd give me some tips. I send you that ask already but it means ght be deleted by tumblr and it was all messy and ugly.

So I have one childhood friend, we used to do everything together till highschool. Often she was my only friend, like now. We slowly started to distance from each other sonce she has a boyfriend. For all those years I did my best to accept him and all, told myself that duh she is not obliged to spent time only with me even in situation when she spent less and less time with me. Sometime I had a bit trouble to fully accept bf because sometime when they argued she was venting to me and I felt like his is hurting her but she refused to break up with him. Boy eas very insecure, no friends and so on and one day around graduating junior hight school she wanted to break up with him but he said something like he is gonna hurt himself if she will, or just drop out the school. So she wanted to wait at least until he graduate, but she waited longer. Then just after we graduated hightschool she broke up with him like she had enought. It was prolly a mistake but after she vent I said one or two things about him concerning past events and I said 'wow finally'. After a while they made up and she said she just missend him. I promissed mtself I will never comment whatever she tell me about them, unless in a good way.

Well... the point is that I am probably jellous, that she doesnt want to spent time with me anymore. Alway if I ask her out I give her to eventually pick the date, if nit today then maybe tomorrow etc y know introvert way :D And im trying to save this friendship? She is not the person busy 24/7, unless maybe when she is in uni or we count playing games as being busy. I play games too sometime.

Sometime it seems like she tries to avoid me and dont want to tell me anything. One day I was talking to her in cafee and she was just fidgeting with her phone. She didnt even like heck the socialmedia, just switching between random (system?) folders on the phone. When I asked abt it why she doesnt listen, she said she wanted to do sth but forgot what. Another time I havent seen her for months and she alway soent holidays 1 month her bf comes to her (he lives abroad already I guess) and I dont want to disturb them of feel like third wheel and the other month she come to him. So like week before she pnanned to go I asked her to go out next day. She said she cant. So asked another day, she answered : but I go to my bf. So I surprised that its that soon and sad I missed the oportunity: oh really? When? She: on Friday me: but its Monday(?)(no answer) so...? She: ught I know ;;; but lately I dont really feel like going anywhere :(

Well... maybe I'm childish but I felt sad.

I'm also jellous that they even celebrate each others bdays altought she never do that bc of religious reasons and I've always respected that.

Once I asked her what is with us, we barely talk for last few years and I feel like she is avoiding me. She had no Idea what I was talking about, she felt like everything was the same.

I was told to not have much hope or expectations toward her bu maybe try to text her or maybe arrange a meeting once in a while and try not to become bitter.

The other one sait that that how adulthood looks like, we become busier with private issues and so on and I may act childish and selfish, but as far as I know except for time she go to uni or to her bf she is not that busy, definitely not that busy not to have time to meet with me more than once in a whole year (or none) when we live ~20min apart by foot. I dont want to be burden to anyone or feel like third wheel so I dunno what to do. I have problem with finding friends, she was my only one friend (?) for years. I dont trust ppl easly

I wanted to do more things together outside since we both used to or still do soent too much time on the computer but well... you know, together is easier.

Since I have to do it on my own maybe you have some ideas? Thats stupid wuestion I guess since you dont know my environment. Jogging and biking wont work I guess since I dont have proper bike. I wanted to plant some flowers but I was afraid I screw everything up since im kida kid who grow up in the bubble and Im not sure how to do basics and nobody wanted to help me and its too late already... Walk is fine but I prefer places far from road and since I'm not supposed to go to the forest that I love I dont have many spots to go.

I am sorry for long post. Any even tiny help would be appreaciated. I hope thats not much of the problem, have a nice day or night :)

-PineconeAnon

I do think that it's time for you to let go of the friendship. I know that's hard to do but people grow apart and that's okay. It's okay. You'll be able to make better relationships and move forward but you have to learn to let go and keep walking forward. It sounds like you're holding onto this friendship because you want to keep going on like it's the past but...

It doesn't work like that. Change happens. It hurts sometimes but it's not a bad thing. You can reflect on this with time and learn how to be able to accept it. You need someone that wants to hang out with you and relax with you. It's not childish to be upset but it's important to see when people just... don't have time for you anymore and feelings change.

It just seems like you both have a fundamental misunderstanding and if you can't talk that through, then it's not working. You can try to talk about it but it seems like it'd be better to just let go. She doesn't think there's something wrong but you do. If you feel stress around her instead of friendship, it's not great.

But, that's up to you, you know? You decide your relationships what you want them to be.

I don't really have great advice for making friends as an adult. I'm not exactly going out and interacting with people. I can suggest finding a new set of friends online by joining Discords and interacting with the fandoms you're in because that's how I've made friends. It's easier to do that if you're anxious about making friends outside.

Try new hobbies. Take a deep breath. If you want to garden, try it out. You're not going to be perfect the first time. It's a learning process at anything and you have to just try. You don't get to live it if you don't try. You have to consider your limits and reflect on what is going to be the easiest thing to try.

It's never too late.

Try to start small and work your way up.

[shiishki]

okay wait, i changed my mind. you should answer all of these questions as well, if that's what you want from me >:)

oof there's a lot of it, that's what i get for wanting to be ✨aesthetic✨

1: 6 of the songs you listen to most?

vowels (and the importance of being me) - hunny

honeypie - jawny

pretty young thing - michael jackson

mirrors - justin timberlake

sunflower - red orange county

paradise - rude-a

2: If you could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be?

a therapist.

ok someone else.. uhh,, my grand grandma because i only have scratches of memories but i dunno if that counts since she passed away...

*rummages through ancient scripts* uhh ok someone who isn't dead.. uhm,, tommie? yeah I'd like to meet them if i could meet anyone on earth

3: Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 23, give me line 17.

ok, the closest german, english or polish book? nvm i have english

"suddenly was. So I just said thank you a few times too, and Mum" ironically this is one of the normal lines in this book

4: What do you think about most?

the fact that I'll have to do something after school. and I don't know if i want to go to college or get a job bc i have no legitimate idea on what to do with my life. it gets overwhelming, just the lack of knowledge about the actual experience.

5: What does your latest text message from someone else say?

Ok

6: Do you sleep with or without clothes on?

with, tho i sleep with just shorts in summer

7: What’s your strangest talent?

not sure if it's a talent, but i can fall asleep anywhere

8: Girls… (finish the sentence); Boys… (finish the sentence)

girls are pretty. boys are pretty

9: Ever had a poem or song written about you?

by me, yes. no one else has written a poem about me specifically. nvm, tommie wrote one and it shall rest on my wall, or desk, i need to find a place for it

10: When is the last time you played the air guitar?

uhh i think last month?

11: Do you have any strange phobias?

i don't think so, but i am hella afraid of the possibly gigantic, terrifying things in the ocean depths that humans haven't discovered yet

12: Ever stuck a foreign object up your nose?

yep, beloved legos as a lil child

13: What’s your religion?

i can't ever remember the name, but i believe gods (from all religions) exist in some way or form. so i believe in different pantheons and etc.

14: If you are outside, what are you most likely doing?

walking my doggo, skateboarding, thinking about how to make the lives of my characters worse

15: Do you prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it?

behind it.

16: Simple but extremely complex. Favorite band?

uhmm the arctic monkeys? or the strokes

17: What was the last lie you told?

i know what i want

18: Do you believe in karma?

yes, the rule of three specifically

19: What does your URL mean?

i don't know. it's something me and my sis came up with and that's just my whole identity now.

20: What is your greatest weakness; your greatest strength?

uhh greatest weakness.. i can't finish things. strength is that I'm very stubborn so maybe I'll finish that thing out of spite

21: Who is your celebrity crush?

i grew up thinking crushes were like unicorns. my ex was odd enough to argue with that i didn't love her if i didn't have a crush on her. but I think if i had to guess.. selena gomez, especially in the role of alex russo in wizard of weverly street

22: Have you ever gone skinny dipping?

nope

23: How do you vent your anger?

i write angry letters. sometimes they're sad letters. i write a lot of letters. except i never send them out and no one made a movie about them :}

24: Do you have a collection of anything?

jars and witchy bottles, books? scented candles

25: Do you prefer talking on the phone or video chatting online?

phone calls are stressful enough as is, i don't need you to see my reading off what i frantically wrote to not stumble over my words

26: Are you happy with the person you’ve become?

i think so, yes, but that won't stop me from becoming better

27: What’s a sound you hate; sound you love?

hate flies buzzing right by my ear, love cat purring

28: What’s your biggest “what if”?

what if I'd been born in a place where it was illegal for me (nonbinary) to live, in a time when others thought of me as a curse?

29: Do you believe in ghosts? How about aliens?

they be chilling.

30: Stick your right arm out; what do you touch first? Do the same with your left arm.

right arm, doggo, left arm, pillow

31: Smell the air. What do you smell?

fresh air and doggo, because doggo is with me and I can't live without open windows

32: What’s the worst place you have ever been to?

i dunno tbh

33: Choose: East Coast or West Coast?

which one is less homophobic?

34: Most attractive singer of your opposite gender?

every gender is my opposite gender. selena gomez and justin timberlake

35: To you, what is the meaning of life?

to make it easier for people down the line

36: Define Art.

make thing, thing goes woo

37: Do you believe in luck?

yis

38: What’s the weather like right now?

it's nice actually, very sunny, slight breeze

39: What time is it?

12.59 am

40: Do you drive? If so, have you ever crashed?

i don't, but i once crashed into a fire department vehicle with my bike. bike ded.

41: What was the last book you read?

Crooked Kingdom by Leigh Bardugo

42: Do you like the smell of gasoline?

i legit ass don't know what gasoline smells like.

43: Do you have any nicknames?

many variations of my name, aka. Luce

44: What was the last film you saw?

i think it was Robin Hood: King of Thieves, but it might have been that half of spider-man homecoming i managed to watch with my poor internet

45: What’s the worst injury you’ve ever had?

oh man i dunno... it's not an injury, but i was very sickly as a lil kid and almost died :)

46: Have you ever caught a butterfly?

once, years ago

47: Do you have any obsessions right now?

hmmm horizon zero dawn i think

48: What’s your sexual orientation?

proud pansexual ^^

49: Ever had a rumour spread about you?

not really, i don't think they're big enough to be actual rumors,, meh

50: Do you believe in magic?

yis

51: Do you tend to hold grudges against people who have done you wrong?

meh. they suck, i know they suck, that's it.

52: What is your astrological sign?

cancer ♋

53: Do you save money or spend it?

i attempt saving. attempt

54: What’s the last thing you purchased?

for my own money, sweets. i bought lizards for my cats so they can brush their teeth from my dad's amazon acc

55: Love or lust?

luv

56: In a relationship?

nope, i buy my own cookies

57: How many relationships have you had?

1, kinda toxic toward the end, very stressful, don't recommend

58: Can you touch your nose with your tongue?

nu ><

59: Where were you yesterday?

on the fields walking my doggo

60: Is there anything pink within 10 feet of you?

yep, a pastel pink hoodie in my closet uwu

61: Are you wearing socks right now?

yis, thicc warm socks

62: What’s your favourite animal?

cats

63: What is your secret weapon to get someone to like you?

cuddles and food.

64: Where is your best friend?

bold of you to assume i have a best friend.

65: Give me your top 5 favourite blogs on Tumblr.

tommie-hildebrandt, kageyuji, nekomas-kuroo, joyful-soul-collector

66: What is your heritage?

I'm a demon boi from Poland tho that's not a thing to be proud of, i mean, look at the economy. awful.

67: What were you doing last night at 12AM?

sleeping, trying to sleep.

68: What do you think is Satan’s last name?

Pinkton. or Satan.

69: Be honest. Ever gotten yourself off?

this is such an odd combination of words i had to look it up. yea.

70: Are you the kind of friend you would want to have as a friend?

a friend who won't laugh at me when i ask them to order smth for me because I'm too anxious to.

71: You are walking down the street on your way to work. There is a dog drowning in the canal on the side of the street. Your boss has told you if you are late one more time you get fired. What do you do?

excuse me? i am saving the doggo wtf. f u boss, I'm gonna sell my tragic story to the news.

72: You are at the doctor’s office and she has just informed you that you have approximately one month to live. a) Do you tell anyone/everyone you are going to die? b) What do you do with your remaining days? c) Would you be afraid?

a) i tell my parents. b) live the hell out of them uwu c) nope uwu.

73: You can only have one of these things; trust or love.

trust.

74: What’s a song that always makes you happy when you hear it?

history maker - dean fujioka :]

75: What are the last four digits in your cell phone number?

3332

76: In your opinion, what makes a great relationship?

communication, trust, some more communication.

77: How can I win your heart?

let's not pretend to be something else to please each other, and bring some bitter chocolate.

78: Can insanity bring on more creativity?

maybe. it could. i don't have a say in it since my sanity is held by tape.

79: What is the single best decision you have made in your life so far?

eat the pizza. stop caring about others not liking me/parts of me. just living for myself uwu.

80: What size shoes do you wear?

uh i dunno how the american sizes work and i don't wanna look it up so, 39, 40 fits too.

81: What would you want to be written on your tombstone?

demon boi

82: What is your favourite word?

socks.

83: Give me the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word; heart.

the bloody organ that sits in your chest and pumps blood into your body so you don't die.

84: What is a saying you say a lot?

uhm im not sure if that counts as a saying, but fake it till you make it

85: What’s the last song you listened to?

blinding lights - the weeknd

86: Basic question; what’s your favourite colour/colours?

oh a normal question people use for ice breaking, sea blue and pastel variations of it.

87: What is your current desktop picture?

like my wallpaper? or the actual picture that sits on my desk? or how my desk looks like atm? it's ugly, a lot of papers and pens and schoolbooks.

88: If you could press a button and make anyone in the world instantaneously explode, who would it be?

donald trump. or the next asshole who'll try to take the rights of the lgbt and poc away

89: What would be a question you’d be afraid to tell the truth on?

this. this is the question.

90: One night you wake up because you heard a noise. You turn on the light to find that you are surrounded by MUMMIES. The mummies aren’t really doing anything, they’re just standing around your bed. What do you do?

yo there's a pizza somewhere in the refrigerator, want me to heat it up? we can have a sleep over and talk about our feelings :3

91: You accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow you with the super-power of your choice! What is that power?

telekinesis! or shapeshifting! i could do such fun things with telekinesis ^^ yeah I'd totally eat some radioactive veggies

92: You can re-live any point of time in your life. The time-span can only be a half-hour, though. What half-hour of your past would you like to experience again?

that time my "friends" got me into shoplifting, half-hour is more than enough to punch some sense into my brain and develop good music taste

93: You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?

can i save this one? i don't think i have an experience horrible enough to be erased haha

94: You have the opportunity to sleep with the music-celebrity of your choice. Who would it be?

sleep as in.. uh no thank u. but I'm down for a sleep over with sam smith ^^

95: You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go?

just me? what about my pets? my fam? it's lowkey illegal for me to go just anywhere without them owO

uhhmm, greece. imma become part of the greek pantheon out of pure spite. and maybe toronto canada.

96: Do you have any relatives in jail?

not any that i know of o.o

97: Have you ever thrown up in the car?

i think i may have but i honestly don't remember

98: Ever been on a plane?

nope, i dunno if i like planes, but I'd probably sleep if i were on one.

99: If the whole world were listening to you right now, what would you say?

yeet.

[linos-teeth]

i got tagged

in the 50 questions and the about me tag by @chngbok ty browse!! these are a lot of questions and idk who i want to bother with them (unless you wanna be bothered then consider yourself tagged) but in case you wanna know some random stuff abt me there’s a lot of that under the cut!

what takes too much of your time?

currently, fic writing for sure

what makes your day better?

uhhh ideas, music, skz (except lino bc he literally just makes me cry)

what is the best thing that happened to you today?

lino in the victory song dance practice? (wow there's a theme already)

what fictional place would you like to go to?

hmmmmm the arbor wilds, the crossroads, the forge, h-047c, watford

are you good at giving advice?

nah

do you have any mental illness?

uhhhh not theoretically (as in not diagnosed oops)

have you ever experienced sleep paralysis?

luckily not

what musician inspired you the most?

boy i rly can't say, usually it's writers or games that inspire me and music not so much?

have you fallen in love?

most likely yeah

what’s your dream date?

idk man surprise me like...going out exploring and doing things i haven't done before that don't include any drugs or stuff also movies are good

what do others notice about you?

my hair (it's long)

what is an annoying habit that you have?

biting my uh...the skin next to my nails? and my lips? i guess?

do you still talk to your first love?

ha nah

how many ex’s do you have?

zero

how many songs are in your playlist?

i have 685 deezer faves

what instruments do you play?

piano, idk if recorder counts, used to play the oboe but...not any more

who do you have the most pictures of?

myself XD, my da/me chars, also random idol pictures for reaction memes

where would you like to go before you die?

uhhhhh a lot of places like...there's a lot of cities in europe i still wanna see and i wanna go back to paris and london and i also would love to visit like 294503 national parks in the us also maybe a desert (bc stars) and somewhere far north (for northern lights)

what’s your zodiac?

scorpio

do you relate to it?

nope

what is happiness to you?

just like...a content feeling? like...idk words for it but when you just stop and go like fuck this is rly good i'm rly comfy rn and not sad??? like just being good in your own skin?

are you going through anything right now?

not more than usual

what’s the worst decision you’ve ever made?

i made a few sucky time management decision throughout my uni time and still am so i guess that

what’s your favorite store?

what's a store

what’s your opinion on abortion?

i don't rly think i get to say much abt it while i'm not in a position where i can talk yknow? you should be allowed to but i imagine it's tough as shit too

do you keep a bucket list?

nah

do you have a favorite album?

A FEW there's wildness by snow patrol and mania by fob and wild world by bastille and miroh (that's currently tho that shit changes a lot)

what do you want for your birthday?

my birthday isn't happening for a while and what i want i kinda need before so xD for my birthday i wish i could be with my family but i won't be able to :/

what are most people’s first impression of you?

uhhhhh awk i guess which is right, also rly smart and like...organised which is wrong

what age to you seem according to most people?

apparently like 16, i always get asked when i finish school

where do you keep your phone while sleeping?

on my bed next to my pillow, stuffed under some plushies

what word do you say the most?

idk honestly i don't talk much probably some expletive

what’s the oldest age would you date?

idk man i'm not rly attracted to ppl much older than me never have been if it ever happened they'd prolly be like 2 years younger oops that's like the norm with crushes

what’s the youngest age would you date?

oh uh see above i guess like...currently i'm 23 so like? not younger than 20?

what job/career do most people say sould suit you?

they don't rly say anything abt that xD

what’s your favorite music genre?

uhhh rock? alt stuff? i love some folk and some pop too and i'm a slut for lofi

if you would live in any country in the world, where would it be?

here tbh

what’s your current favorite song?

u h h probably still chronosaurus! doesn't look like it's leaving that spot any time soon oops

how long have you have this blog for?

a bit over a month now?

what are you excited for?

how pathetic is it if i say my summer course? idk just...smth new i guess i'm looking forward to it (not to being away from games and photoshop)

are you a better talker or a listener?

listener

what is the last productive thing you did?

i finished vacuuming the house today

what do you want for Christmas?

s h r u g

what classes do you get the best grades in?

language stuff, music

on a scale of 1-10 how are you feeling right now?

a 4? maybe?

what can you see yourself doing in 10 years?

idk man i wanna go into speech therapy so?? that? or research even? but i gotta get into the masters first rip

when did you first get your heartbreak?

oh dear. probably like...in kindergarten when my crush was an absolute ass (so far, 80% of them have been there's a theme) i was pathetic

at what age do you want to get married?

idk man i guess in like 100 years when someone finally decides they rly want to put up with this mess

what career did you want to have as a child?

florist, author, actress

what do you crave right now?

hugs? and drawing skill

1. How tall are you?

i'm jisung-sized

2. What color are your eyes?

hazel

3. What color and style is your hair?

uhhhh dark blonde would be the accurate desc prolly? it's like...blondebrowngoldish and too long and i usually braid it and i have a super messy fringe

4. Do you wear glasses?

no

5. Do you have braces?

luckily not!

6. What’s your fashion sense?

casual and basic with a dash of experimental and sometimes a bit cutesy

7. Full name?

8. When were you born?

long, long ago, too long ago

9. Where are you from and where do you live

germany!

10. What school(s) do you go to?

no more school for me, i'm going to university

11. What kind of student are you?

the one that kinda gets by far too well for procrastinating so badly (all i have to say in my defense is that i'm anxious as shit abt everything)

12. Do you like school?

i used to!! like...the last 3 and first 3 years were chill

13. Fav subject?

music, history, english, latin

14. Fav TV shows?

i rly only watch b99 but i would be careful calling it my favorite since like...3 eps ago

15. Fav books?

my current fave is less by andrew sean greer (aka it was my fave last autumn and i've read like 3 since and they weren't super great)

16. Fav pastimes?

uhhh writing gaming music and lately, giffing too!

17. Do you have any regrets?

a couple

18. Dream job?

i mean i do still wish i could just like...do smth artsy like be an author or an illustrator but i'm bad at writing and literally cannot draw at all so

19. Would you ever like to be married?

yes absolutely

20. Would you like to have children?

kinda yeah?

21. If so, how many?

2

22. Do you like shopping?

only for a limited amount of time

23. What countries have you visited?

denmark, norway, france, the uk, spain, italy, austria, slovakia, we also drove through switzerland like twice

24. Scariest nightmare you’ve ever had?

uhhhhhh basically all of the end of the world/war scenario dreams i've had?

25. Any enemies?

does myself count

26. Do you have a significant other?

nah

27. Do you get along with your family?

yeah? we're not super close but we don't hate each other

28. Do you believe in miracles?

I BELIEVE IN MIRACLES WHERE YA FROM YOU SEXY THING no but rly i do

29. How are you?

not terrible

[rosesandruin]

1-100 for the ask thing

1. What’s your philosophy in life?-If it doesn’t make you happy, it’s not worth it.2. What’s the one thing you would like to change about yourself?-Only one?3. Are you religious or spiritual?-No4. Do you consider yourself an introvert or an extrovert?-Introvert5. Which parent are you closer to and why?-My mom, ig. I spend the most time with her.6. What was the best phase in your life?-My bookworm/writer phase7. What was the worst phase in your life?-My “I want to kill myself” phase8. Is what you’re doing now what you always wanted to do growing up?-No9. What makes you feel accomplished?-When I finish a day of work, get a paycheck, or finish all of my homework10. What’s your favorite book/movie of all time and why did it speak to you so much?-My favorite book is “To Kill a Mockingbird.” I don’t really know why11. What is a relationship deal breaker for you?-Ig not being compassionate?12. Are you more into looks or brains?-Idk13. Would you ever take back someone who cheated?-No14. How do you feel about sharing your password with your partner?-I’m okay with that15. When do you think a person is ready for marriage?-??? What kind of question is this?16. What kind of parent do you think you will be?-Better than mine were, I hope17. What would you do if your parents didn’t like your partner?-Eh, that wouldn’t happen. I have good taste.18. Who is that one person you can talk to about just anything?-Um…19. Do you usually stay friends with your exes?-Idk, I don’t have any20. Have you ever lost someone close to you?-Yes21. If you are in a bad mood, do you prefer to be left alone or have someone to cheer you up?-Left alone if I’m angry/irritated. Cheered up if I’m sad/depressed/anxious.22. What’s an ideal weekend for you?-Camping23. What do you think of best friends of the opposite sex?-They’re okay?24. Do you judge a book by its cover?-Yeah25. Are you confrontational?-No26. When was the last time you broke someone’s heart?-Never, I hope27. Would you relocate for love?-Yeah, sure28. Did you ever write a journal?-Yeah29. What are you most thankful for?-Umm… my cat30. Do you believe in second chances?-Yeah, depending31. What’s the one thing that people always misunderstand about you?-Probably my mental illnesses32. What is your idea of a perfect vacation?-Going somewhere new33. What did your past relationship teach you?-N/A34. What are your thoughts on online dating or tinder?-Good for them?35. What’s on your bucket list this year?-Get a tattoo36. When have you felt your biggest adrenaline rush?-Um, probably one of the times I was at Cedar Point37. What is the craziest thing you’ve ever done and would you do it again?-I was in a smol (safe-ish) backyard demolition derby with my uncles and 10/10 would do again38. If a genie granted you 3 wishes right now, what would you wish for?-I just want a job39. What’s your biggest regret in life?-Not doing more solos in choir in high school, dropping out of band40. What do you think about when you’re by yourself?-Anything and everything41. Does your job make you happy?-What job42. What did you want to be when you were younger?-A vet, a detective, a teacher43. Why did your last relationship end?-N/A45. What’s been your biggest mistake so far in life and what did you learn from it?-I don’t know46. Where is your favorite place in the entire world to go?-Ottawa, I guess. Ottawa’s cool. Or Disney World. It’s magical.47. What are your top five favorite movies?-Lilo and Stitch, Dead Poet’s Society, Ferris Bueller’s Day Off, The Breakfast Club, Pretty in Pink48. What are some of your favorite songs?-Riptide – Vance Joy; She Had the World – Panic!; Won’t Back Down – Tom Petty; Hurt – Johnny Cash49. What qualities do you admire about your parents?-My mom never gave up, and she works every day to improve herself.50. How would you describe your best friend?-My what51. What’s your favorite hobby to do alone?-Sing, ig52. What’s something you can’t go a day without doing?-Um. Sleep53. What’s the most spontaneous thing you’ve done lately?-I spontaneously went to visit my dad, but that was for a funeral. So.54. What’s the craziest thing you’ve ever done for love?-I don’t think I’ve ever done anything like that.55. What’s your biggest pet peeve?-When people won’t leave me alone when I want to be.56. Why do you think you’re still single?-I’m… not…57. What accomplishment are you most proud of?-Struggling through geometry class all year but getting 100% on the exam (only one of two to do so.) And also getting in to all of the colleges I applied to.58. What is one dream you have yet to accomplish?-Moving out.59. What is your greatest fear?-Never being able to transition the way I want.60. What are three things you value most about a person?-Compassion, humor, determination61. Who are five people you are closest with?@stay-strange-kids , @dgrayfee , @floridkore , @hedphoneson , and my stepsister62. What is the greatest struggle you’ve overcome?-High school.63. If you could live anywhere in the world where would it be?-Spain?64. What’s the most exciting thing that’s happened this past year?-Got a girlfriend65. What’s your favorite beer?-Ew, I don’t drink beer bc I have taste buds66. What’s one thing that bothers you most about the world today?-Hate67. Who are you closer with your mom or your dad?-Didn’t we go through this? My mom68. If you could change one thing about yourself what would it be?-We went through this, too?69. If you could change one thing about the world what would it be?-Less greed, more compassion70. Who was your favorite teacher and why?-It was my 6th grade English teacher for a while, bc she always encouraged my reading and writing. But in high school, it was one of the special ed teachers. She was amazing and did so much for me.71. What sport did you fall in love with?-None72. What is the weirdest thing about you?-My personality.73. What was your longest relationship?-n/a74. What would your best friend say is your best quality?-My what?75. Who is your favorite historical figure?-Obama76. What made you choose the college you went to?-The location and atmosphere77. If you could tell your former self one thing right now what would it be?-It gets better. Do your homework.78. What food could you not live without?-Tacos79. Dogs or Cats?-Don’t pit my babies against each other like this.80. What’s closest you’ve ever come to being arrested?-Um. Never?81. What was your best birthday?-…I can’t think of one.82. What’s one thing you wish you knew how to do?-Play guitar and piano83. Where’s one place you’d like to go that you haven’t been?-Spain84. What was the last book you read? And When?-I can’t remember85. Where do you usually get your news?-Idk86. What are some of your own personal goals in the next 5 years?-Start hrt, get top surgery, buy a car, move out, graduate87. What would you consider your greatest accomplishment so far?-wE WEnT oVeR tHIS88. If you could get away with anything that you do?-Rob a bank89. Who is your greatest hero?-I don’t have one90. What’s the greatest risk you’ve ever taken?-Speeding while driving even tho I don’t have my license91. Why are we here?-WHY ARE WHO WHERE, WHAT, DON’T DO THIS92. If heaven is real and you died tomorrow, would you get in?-I hope not.93. Do you believe in fate?-Yeah94. How do you think people see you?-With their eyes, I assume?95. If you had the ability to erase something that you did in the past, whatwould it be?-There was this one time I hit my sister… It was bad…96. What song makes you unconditionally happy?-Um… idk97. If you could have anybody else’s life, who’s would you take?-No one’s. My life is my own.98. What fictional character do you most relate to?-None99. If I asked you at age 5 what you wanted to be when you grew up, what would you say?-A veterinarian100. What is your biggest irrational fear?-Being stuck here my whole life. But I don’t think that’s completely irrational?

[platonic-bellarke]

Do all of the number asks

Wow ok 1: Full nameSarah Abigail Large 2: Age163: 3 FearsDrowning, being considered an annoying friend, being ignored 4: 3 things I loveMusic Frank iero Art5: 4 turns onTattoos Dark hair (on guys on girls anything)Blue eyes Being able to listen to me rant and talk about things I love 6: 4 turns offRepublicans Homophobic people Ignoring me Hypocrisy 7: My best friendShe goes to my school 8: Sexual orientationBisexual9: My best first dateI have never dated anyone lmao10: How tall am I5’4 and a half11: What do I missMy Chemical Romance and my best friend in elementary school and middle school 12: What time was I bornI think around 12:35 in the afternoon 13: Favourite colorAnything blue tbh (pretty much cool colors)14: Do I have a crushYes, I actually have 2 lmao here’s this girl and my school and this guy at this other school 15: Favourite quote“Sometimes you have to kind of die inside in order to rise from your own ashes and believe in yourself and love yourself and become a better person” or “All your quirks, all your problems-even your depressions and your failures-it what makes you, you” both by Gerard Way (or just “keep running” from danger days) 16: Favourite placeMy bed with my dog and cat listening to music 17: Favourite foodI love banana and grapes 18: Do I use sarcasmOccasionally 19: What am I listening to right nowThe white album by Weezer (specially the song L.A. girlz)20: First thing I notice in new personEither hair and facial features or, if I talk to them, their personality 21: Shoe sizeLike 8-9 (in US women’s)22: Eye colorLike blue, green, grayish 23: Hair colorbrown with some natural blonde highlights 24: Favourite style of clothingI love flannels and black jeans and beanies and hoodies (idk just like that aesthetic)25: Ever done a prank call?Yep27: Meaning behind my URLThe joke of bellarke being platonic and “platonic bellarke” being an oxymoron 28: Favourite moviePretty much any marvel movie (mcu) especially winter soldier or Ragnarok 29: Favourite songFamous last words, mama, the ghost of you, bulletproof heart, literally any thing by My Chemical Romance A Rush of Blood to the Head and Clocks by Coldplay Knights of Cydonia by Muse Jesus of Suburbia by Green Day Say it ain’t so and My Name is Jonas by Weezer Ode to sleep by Twenty One Pilots (I couldn’t narrow it down to one sorry)30: Favourite bandMy Chemical Romance (coldplay and Muse and close seconds)31: How I feel right nowAnxious (over nothing) tired, a little sad32: Someone I loveFrank iero, my best friend, my family 33: My current relationship statusSingle (hmu)34: My relationship with my parentsReally good 35: Favourite holidayHALLOWEEN 36: Tattoos and piercing i haveNone :(37: Tattoos and piercing i wantI want my ears and nose pierced. I want a My Chemical Romance, Coldplay, and muse tattoo (and many more)38: The reason I joined TumblrI made my first account in 2013 because my friends had tumblr and I want to blog about bands and tv shows. I made this one in 2016 because I want my tv shows and movie posts to be separated from my band blog. My band blog is less active now and has less followers lmao39: Do I and my last ex hate each other?Don’t have an ex. Never dated anyone 40: Do I ever get “good morning” or “good night ” texts?Nope :/41: Have I ever kissed the last person you texted?No42: When did I last hold hands?My sister will grab my hands randomly haha43: How long does it take me to get ready in the morning?For school like 10 minutes but like if I’m going out and actually care about my appearance like an hour to an hour and a half 44: Have You shaved your legs in the past three days?Nope45: Where am I right now?The bath46: If I were drunk & can’t stand, who’s taking care of me?I have never drank (and tbh don’t plan on it) but probably my friends (?)47: Do I like my music loud or at a reasonable level?In my headphones: loud. In a public area: reasonable bc I don’t want to bother anyone 48: Do I live with my Mom and Dad?Yep I’m only 1649: Am I excited for anything?YES I AM MEETING AND SEEING AWOLNATION, JUDAH AND THE LION, AND DAN AND PHIL 50: Do I have someone of the opposite sex I can tell everything to?nope. I have 0 guys friends bc I go to an all girls school 51: How often do I wear a fake smile?Lmao when ever I talk to someone who talks for too long or when I’m talking to teachers 52: When was the last time I hugged someone?Like 2 weeks ago not sure 53: What if the last person I kissed was kissing someone else right in front of me?I never kissed anyone lmao54: Is there anyone I trust even though I should not?Haha yep55: What is something I disliked about today?My body 56: If I could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be?Frank iero (or Gerard Way or Chris Martin) 57: What do I think about most?How much i hate my body and how much I miss my Chemical Romance 58: What’s my strangest talent?I don’t really have any talents (I can whistle really well) 59: Do I have any strange phobias?Ladybugs60: Do I prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it?Either (I want to become a film maker or an actor so)61: What was the last lie I told?Told my friend I was busy the other day when really I just wanted to be alone and watch Lucifer and runaways 62: Do I perfer talking on the phone or video chatting online?Depends on the person but usually phone 63: Do I believe in ghosts? How about aliens?No for ghost yes for aliens 64: Do I believe in magic?Nope65: Do I believe in luck?Nope66: What’s the weather like right now?Super cold but I like lt (like 33 degrees and sunny) (0 degrees if your a Celsius person)67: What was the last book I’ve read?I am reading the umbrella academy comic by Gerard Way currently but for a book... I don’t really like to read books (for school I just read summary’s lmao) so the last full book I read was probably the hobbit in middle school (I love that book)68: Do I like the smell of gasoline?Yes 69: Do I have any nicknames?Abea, Dabby, anby70: What was the worst injury I’ve ever had?I got a cut on the top of the head when I was little and my dad had to stick it back 71: Do I spend money or save it?I try to save it but it usually doesn’t happen 72: Can I touch my nose with a tounge?No 73: Is there anything pink in 10 feets from me?Yes, a shampoo bottle 74: Favourite animal?CATS75: What was I doing last night at 12 AM?Watching Stephen Colbert 76: What do I think is Satan’s last name is?Either trump or Morningstar (I have been watching too much Lucifer Help)77: What’s a song that always makes me happy when I hear it?Vampire money, famous last words by My Chemical Romance Mr. Brightside by the Killers 78: How can you win my heart?Liking the same music or shows and movies as me/Being able to listen to me rant about things I either love or hate 79: What would I want to be written on my tombstone?Idk something meaningful not sure yet 80: What is my favorite word?Idk I like the word nonchalant81: My top 5 blogs on tumblrI refuse to narrow it down to 5 82: If the whole world were listening to me right now, what would I say?Listen to conventional weapons by My Chemical Romance 83: Do I have any relatives in jail?Nope84: I accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow me with the super-power of my choice! What is that power?Either teleportation/Shrink and grow at will/or change my appearance and look like whoever I want 85: What would be a question I’d be afraid to tell the truth on?Why I am sad86: What is my current desktop picture?I have like 10 back grounds but my main ones are my meet and greet with 30STM, a pic of frank iero I took at his show, and a pic of Matt Bellamy I took at a muse show 87: Had sex?No but I would like to 88: Bought condoms?Nope89: Gotten pregnant?Nope and hopefully I never will90: Failed a class?Nope91: Kissed a boy?Nope, but I would like to 92: Kissed a girl?No, but I would like to93: Have I ever kissed somebody in the rain?Nope94: Had job?Nope95: Left the house without my wallet?Yep96: Bullied someone on the internet?No97: Had sex in public?Nope98: Played on a sports team?Yep, I swam and played soccer when I was younger 99: Smoked weed?Nope but I would like to100: Did drugs?No101: Smoked cigarettes?No and I don’t want to102: Drank alcohol?Yes, my parents will let me try their drinks. I have never liked them 103: Am I a vegetarian/vegan?I don’t eat any meat besides occasionally chicken 104: Been overweight?Yep105: Been underweight?Nope106: Been to a wedding?Yep107: Been on the computer for 5 hours straight?Yep108: Watched TV for 5 hours straight?Yep 109: Been outside my home country?Yep110: Gotten my heart broken?Kinda, one of my friends told me some pretty awful shit that made me hate myself and convince my self I have no friends so I hate her now and we used to be very close but whatever 111: Been to a professional sports game?Yep112: Broken a bone?I broke my finger once113: Cut myself?No but I have tried 114: Been to prom?No but I will this year !115: Been in airplane?Yep (was actually on one yesterday haha)116: Fly by helicopter?Nope117: What concerts have I been to?Boi so many. I have been to over 15Including Fall Out Boy Three Times Panic! At the Disco 3 times Twenty one pilots 3 timesWeezer 3 times (a 4th this summer)PVRIS 3 timesMuse30 Seconds to Mars Coldplay Frank iero and the Patience Bastille twice Judah and the lionBlink-182Green DayMaroon 5 118: Had a crush on someone of the same sex?Yep, I currently do119: Learned another language?Nope 120: Wore make up?Yes, I love makeup 121: Lost my virginity before I was 18?Nope, I’m only 16 though 122: Had oral sex?Nope123: Dyed my hair?Yep124: Voted in a presidential election?Nope125: Rode in an ambulance?Nope126: Had a surgery?I got my wisdom teeth removed does that count (?)127: Met someone famous?Yep, 30stm(Jared Leto), Tyler Joseph of twenty one pilots, panic! At the Disco, misha and Jared and Jensen from Supernatural, and Victoria justice 128: Stalked someone on a social network?Yep129: Peed outside?Yep130: Been fishing?Yes I hated it 131: Helped with charity?Yep 132: Been rejected by a crush?I have never asked anyone out 133: Broken a mirror?Nope 134: What do I want for birthday?Concert tickets, a s.o.135: How many kids do I want and what will be their names?I never want kids omfg 136: Was I named after anyone?I don’t think so 137: Do I like my handwriting?Hahah no 138: What was my favourite toy as a child?I loved Thomas the train shit139: Favourite Tv Show?Either the 100, sherlock, or Gotham 140: Where do I want to live when older?I would like to live in Europe for some time in my life but I’ll probably stay in Tennessee for most of my life but I would love to travel everywhere 141: Play any musical instrument?No but I am trying to learn bass 142: One of my scars, how did I get it?There’s a scar on my knee from when i was climbing rocks to get to a rope swing and I scraped my leg on a rock 143: Favourite pizza toping?Extra cheesy haha (also cold pizza is better)144: Am I afraid of the dark?No I love the dark145: Am I afraid of heights?No I LOVE heights omg 146: Have I ever got caught sneaking out or doing anything bad?No bc I don’t really like doing bad things 147: Have I ever tried my hardest and then gotten disappointed in the end?Yep haha148: What I’m really bad atTalking about my feelings 149: What my greatest achievments arePassing some hard classes, swimming a 50 freestyle in under 30 Seconds 150: The meanest thing somebody has ever said to meOh boy that “friend” to me that:-no one cares about me-I have no close friends -I’m selfish -I take what I want from others -I pride myself on being nice 151: What I’d do if I won in a lotteryUse most of it to have a safe future but some for concert tickets and band stuff 152: What do I like about myselfTbh nothing, maybe the fact that I am ok at makeup (?)153: My closest Tumblr friendDon’t really have any close Tumblr friends. MESSAGE ME IF YOU WANT TO 154: Something I fantasise abouta My Chemical Romance reunion, what it would be like to be in a relationship 155: Any question you’d like??

[arrow-reblogs]

Tag meme

I got tagged by @cry-cats, thanks dude :0 I havent done one of these in years lmao.

I guess i just tag all my mutuals who can be bothered to do this?? or just anyone really.

the last:

1. drink – orange juice 2. phone call – heck idk I haven’t called someone in ages bc anxiety  3. text message – My cousin  4. song you listened to – Some Starbomb stuff 5. time you cried – eh I cant remember that shit. I cry a lot but not recently I guess?? 6. dated someone twice - haha nope fuck that. 7. kissed someone and regretted it – noooo. 8. been cheated on - nah 9. lost someone special – I guess? 10. been depressed – I don’t think so?? 11. gotten drunk and thrown up – I don’t like drinking :0 I haven’t even been tipsy lmao

favourite colours: 12. Sea green 13. Other shades of blue 14. Also faint violet colours idk I like colour combinations more than just one solid colour.

in the last year have you:

15. made new friends - yep  16. fallen out of love - nah 17. laughed until you cried – maybe?? I cry when I do impressions of people so I guess? 18. found out someone was talking about you – yep. 19. met someone who changed you – idk? Probably. 20. found out who your friends are �� certainly.  21. kissed someone on your facebook list – lmao nah

general:

22. how many of your fb friends do you know in real life – idk I don’t really go on that cesspool anymore tbh. 23. any pets – One bearded dragon called Hermes. He is my grumpy pancake son. 24. do you want to change your name – Not really. 25. what did you do for your last birthday – Nothing I think. Planning stuff is scary. 26. what time did you wake up- half eight, I was expecting to sleep in longer seeing as tho I fucked up my sleep schedule. 27. what were you doing at midnight last night – reading angsty fanfiction bc im sad. 28. something you can’t wait for – Going to uni 29. when was the last time you saw your mum – an hour ago lol  30. what are you listening to right now - My dad has some music on downstairs does that count. 32. something that is getting on your nerves: my mind I guess?? I hate how anxious I am with adult responsibilities  33. most visited website – Flight rising maybe? This hellsite and youtube too.  34. hair colour – currently a dark blue/black!! Im gonna dye it again soon tho  35. long or short hair – short!! 36. do you have a crush on someone – nah.  37. what do you like about yourself – I guess my drawing skills?? My personality is shit lol 38. piercings – Just my ears. Tattoos>piercings!! 39. blood type – idk who keeps track of that shit  40. nickname – Don’t have one I guess. O me n one of my friends call each other Disney bae just bc we go watch Disney together when we are sad lmao 41. relationship status – single pringle fuck that relationship bullshit thanks  42. zodiac - Capricorn 43. pronouns - she/her 44. favourite tv show – Lucifer, Voltron, I’m might start watching Game of Thrones bc I’m procrastinating doing my work,, 45. tattoos – none but I can get my first one in like less than six months so that’s pretty cool. 46. right or left handed – left. 47. surgery - Nopppe 49. sport – I used to like basketball and archery, but none of that shit anymore. I just have weekly dance classes now. 50. vacation – Went down south for a few days this year :0 51. pair of trainers – not trainers but I have a pair of combat boots and ive worn them to death.

more general: 52. eating – Pizza soon 53. drinking – orange juice still lol 54. im about to -  actually do work I swear 55. waiting for – something worthwhile. 56. want – to go to bed. 57. get married - maybe  58. career – I wanna be an animator or artist idk how successful thatll be.  59. hugs or kisses – hugs pls  60. lips or eyes – eyes :o 61. shorter or taller – relationship wise??? Same height or taller. But im like almost 6 foot so thatll be tricky. 62. older or younger –  idk?? A little older maybe. 63. nice arms or nice stomach – idk?? I care little for either of these. 64. hook up or relationship – idk?? Im a child pls don’t ask 65. troublemaker or hesitant – hecking hesitant pls  66. kissed a stranger - no 67. drank hard liquor - no and I don’t want to currently. 68. lost glasses or contact lenses – I only lost my glasses like once and it was cause I was sat on them. 69. turned someone down – not to someones face I think. I cant remember this shit. 70 - sex on the first date – nope.  71 - broken someones heart – idk? Probably once or twice. 72. had your heart broken – Lmao no. 73. been arrested – Nope. 74. cried when someone died – duh yeah. 75. fallen for a friend – no.

do you believe in: 76. yourself – fuck no 77. miracles - nooo 78. love at first sight - no 79. santa claus - nope 80. kiss on the first date – heck idk 81. angels - nnah

other: 82. current best friends name - 83. eye colour – brownish hazel 84. favourite movie – aaaa I love httyd?? And so many other animated films,, but dragons are my shit.

[celestialallstars]

Episode #7: “That was what we in the business call a "bruh" moment.” - Stephen

NEVER MIND HE DID IT THE ABSOLUTE MADMAN DID IT HE USED THE VOTE STEAL SUCCESSFULLY AND GOT KORI RIGHT OUT OF THIS GAME. IN YOUR LIFE HAVE YOU EVER SEEN ANYTHING LIKE THAT?

Oh I am so PUMPED! Kori leaving has all but confirmed most of the things we all thought already- Michael/Drew/Matt/Chloe are together. On top of that, Alyssa and by extension, Jack probably is also with them. Which leaves the remaining 4 of the OG Tuatha group (Rhys/Mitch/Stephen/Bryce) then Mitch. This also leaves Bryce/Loris/me. What does this tell me? I can't have Orfeo lose because it is sudden death for Bryce/Stephen/Loris...so I need to make sure my tribe loses. BUT I also need to make sure one of Jack or Alyssa leaves. Whether they are numbers for the others or not, I need people I'm with to gain upperhand before it is too late and if Orfeo keeps losing, even if we get to merge, I don't think it will matter because they will get numbers. So Operation: Snakegrass is now in effect

That was what we in the business call a "bruh" moment.

KORI WAS SLAIN! Not by an idol like I worried, but by an advantage that was much more powerful in that given situation! My game has effectively changed here on the Orfeo Tribe. I'm no longer trying to form an alliance that controls the outcomes of votes, I can only really look out for myself.

Michael, Matt, Drew, and Chloe are very likely to let go of the majority now that they have it. They aren't my rivals anymore. Not until the merge, anyway. Unfortunately, that means if we lose another challenge, Bryce and Loris will need to be the people who go home, barring any insane changes. I'm going to need to pander like I've never pandered before. I can't be mad with Michael until his time comes. Don't worry though, if I have any say in it, he won't make it past the first merge vote.

But, that's assuming I survive that long! I'm sure Bryce and Loris are just as freaked out as I am, so I need to out-pander them. I wish it didn't have to be this way, but that's just how the cookie crumbles.

Operation: Snakegrass so far got the first half downpack with us losing. Jared talked with Mitch who says he is close to me and Rhys. With Zach in the mix, we might be bale to get something going, but now we gotta be careful...anything can happen at this tribal methinks!

WOOP WOOP WOOP WOOP. Safe again! It’s so good to be back on the immunity train Choo choo. It’s also really good because I really don’t want to vote out anyone on my tribe and all the people I’m not as connected with are on the other tribe so keeping my tribe safe even tho I know Stephen and Bryce may not trust me 100% right now is CRUCIAL for my game going forward.

likeee ok. i have some hot goss i suppose. so i knew kori was leaving pre-tribal. bryce leaked the vote steal (michael - > loris - > bryce) and so it was meh. i was truly fine with either kori or matt leaving though because those two are legit like 2 of the only 3-5 people i dont feel like i got a connection with.

throughout the time between tribal results to challenge, i get asked by a few people to throw [bryce, loris, drew, stephen somewhat, chris]. chris mainly proposes that bryce and loris are with us and they're in danger, which is likely true. i just like.. i didnt throw because im triggered by that but i also like probs didnt try my hardest. who knows ! not me. anyway. AFTER I FLOPPED I LEGIT HAD LIKE 4 OF THEM PM ME SAYING 'THANKS FOR THROWING KING' LIKE FUCK OFF LKSDJGLDKGMLKDSGMLKDSG I DIDNT THROW but tbh i might play that up so they think im a generous queen xx

chris seems to want jack or alyssa out, as does jared. chris/rhys made alliance with me them jared and mitch which is cute. i feel like i should leak bc someones going to but im also too lazy to.

im lowkey really anxious though cuz i dont want my tribe to snap at me for thinkin i threw or blindside me. like NNNN and we're so close to merge.  BUT if things go accordingly, one of alyssa or jack should leave. i like both a lot but i think i'd prefer alyssa out. we have a 'f2' or smth but we dont rlly talk and i feel like because we never were on the same tribe til now, our allegiances just fell elsewhere (which is fine but its just hard to maintain that).

i dont want to get blindsided/voted off yet. 14th isnt cute... and like... im so close to merge. my guess is merge will be at 12/13 so... im so close. (its probs f8 but who cares). i just hope i can be safe enough that i dont go. i feel rlly good with chris/jared... rhys decent too. mitch not so much but im gonna try to forge a stronger bond. i think the girls are gonna choose 2 rid of jack but idk.. i hate this cuz i really like jack and getting to meet him beyond just a VL was great n i truly enjoyed this. so if he ends up leaving, and he reads this, i want u to know u are great n i love u n playing w u was fantastic!! same with anyone. like everyone left is fairly active and deserve to be here so im content.

god. anyone wanna speak up is gonna come out when i get blindsided LOL.

Sooo the 24 hour puzzle challenge cracked some things out of the water. Alliances got exposed left and right and now im in a 5 man alliance with og orfero and og tuatha against og cyrena. This is all becauase sharky leaked an alliance in one of his screenshots consisting of drew/michael/clohie/alyssa/jack/matt or some varient. In order for their numbers to weaken, we need to get rid of jack or alyssa. It doesn not help their case that they have not been on a tribe with anyone outside of og cyrena except drew and michael (who are on the other tribe). Right now, my alliance is debating on splitting the votes or making it unanimous but we are afraid of idols. We think that regardless of what happens, the one og cyrena left standing won't trust us any longer. I am excited to see where this tribal goes because the game is finally picking up speed!!!!

this game is carzy i hate it im legit. this is a video of me:

Hello I’m typing this compassionate with them with voice to text hello and say do you want to be your day because Drew Carey dick completely but now I’m scared Zach is going and I don’t want him to which is sad and I don’t know at the last round nothing at the boots that I thought he didn’t I kind a got fucked over

ok that was a disaster I give up. hi . drew carried immunity thank god. but now I’m scared Zach goes because I love Zach. umm I’m basically guaranteed merge unless I get super blindsided because I can just legacy if I think I’m going :^). I voted Matt just in case his vote steal was fake because either he lied and went home or he told the truth and lived but like the thing is Michael and drew don’t want me to tell Matt I knew so I can’t justify why I voted him to him MEANWHILE I told Bryce about it. and Bryce tells Matt he knew completely throwing that out the window but oh well. I love chloe... Bryce.. Michael.... Zach... drew..... Jared... Mitch..........I definitely forgot someone there oh RHYS.... love him and idk I think I’m good with a lot of the cast wooo because I like everyone else too 💗💗💗 when I win we won’t be shocked

The other tribe is super boring like I don’t know what’s happening and there’s like an hour and a half left so like I’m just sat here bored as shit like DO SOMETHING!

Audio might be bad, so basically, Chris has taken me under his wing as maybe his most trusted ally, and pitched me on a side vs. side type deal.

Side 1- Chris, Bryce, Loris, Zach, Mitch, Stephen, Rhys Side 2- Alyssa, Michael, Drew, Jack, Matt, Chloe

I am fully feeding into Chris' game at this point because for myself, working to advance his plan puts me in a much more powerful position than I believe he is anticipating.

Having incredibly close relationships with the Chris/Zach duo, a F2 with Bryce, an alliance with Mitch/Stephen, Rhys confiding in me about his game fears (and Rhys' thoughts being fed to me by Bryce), and an idol--- I really just need to work on Loris some more to establish myself with the most powerful position.

So, I've been very busy. But this tribal I have yet again sat back and haven't done much into it as I have been preoccupied. However it allows other people to take the heat, and I'm aware I'm not doing a lot. So I can spin it into a winning case as long as I do enough come the merge.

The vote is set to be a split on Alyssa and Jack, However Alyssa and Jack havent spoken about the vote which scares me. Which t hen puts me in a paranoid states as I've spoken to people less today. But we just made a new 5 person alliance (chris, me , jared, zach an mitch) which seems super extra if theyre planning on blindsiding me.

It is 7:18 PM and I have no idea who is going home. This is the most stressful fucking tribal I've ever been to

omg so alyssa going home wooh? she talks to me more than jack so i wish he left but like one has to leave so w/e. chris is a king i love him so much he threw for me zach is so annoying and didnt throw said he was but like he literally was trying 80% like girl just throw. i love rhys still and jared.. hope he still likes me idk we feel off. wooh yaa um like loris and i hate that michael and drew both told him about the double vote but not me like isnt that so quirky we hate those elara girls (is that the season they played)

JARED AND MITCH ARE SNAKING ME AND ALYSSA WITH THEIR NONCOMMITTAL RESPONSES I CAN FUCKING FEEL IT IM GOING HOME

________________________________________________________________

Alyssa is voted out 3-2-2.

[depressionconsumes]

answer all of the questions (:

1. Are you good at apologizing?: well.. I think I am. If I know I’m in the wrong I’ll be the first to say I am sorry.

2. Do you prefer your looks or personality?: uhh.. I struggle with liking either to be honest.

3. Are you confident?: sometimes I can be.

4. What are you most confident about yourself?: I’m confident about my eyes I guess ^^

5. Name a few songs that remind you of someone, and who they remind you of: I like it like that by cardi b, the other popular song by cardi b, country roads… they all remind me of my best friend!

6. What is your favorite color combination?: oh this is easy. My three fav colors ofc, blue green and purple xD

7. Define your “aesthetic”: do faeries, elves, mermaids and aliens count as an aesthetic?

8. What is sex to you?: to me it’s something I will only have again if I completely love and trust a person. I wont give that part of myself away to someone I dont love.

9. Do you have any kinks? What are they?: shittt this is a loaded question Haha.. uhh. Well. I’m into BDSM to a degree, I’m a switch but I’m usually more submissive. I could go more into what I’m into with BDSM but I dont want too LOL. most my kinks relate too it as well.

10. What are your biggest pet peeves?: I have so many. Lying, rude customers at work, people making my bestfriend sad, people who have kids but dont care about them enough. The list is long my dudes.

11. What’s something that automatically turns you off of other people?: hmm.. uhh.. getting caught in a lie and trying to make me feel bad about catching the lie they told? That’s something I guess LOL

12. What song always makes you sad and emotional?: right now, what if and we belong make me sad. Theres alot of songs that get me emotional tbh.

13. How many people have you dated? How many of them do you still have feelings for?: 3 serious relationships. I’ve dated 7 total people though. I’m not answering the second part but I will say if you truly love someone you will always have a place in your heart for them.

14. How are you with moving on?: I’m okay with it. At first it’s hard for me. But give it a little bit and I get back up and keep trekking on. You have to be willing to move on to actually do so.

15. What’s a philosophy you agree with but fail to live by?: uhh.. anarchism maybe.

16. What’s something you dont like about yourself?: I don’t like much about myself but I guess I’ll go with the biggest one and say my body.

17. What’s something positive happening in your life right now?Well I think I finally found the path in life that I’m supposed to be on with work if that makes sense. I finally have a job I love to go too.

18. Are you truly able to admit your faults in relationships to yourself?I think I am. I dont always know what my faults are but if they’ve been pointed out and if I see them myself I’m the first one to admit I was at fault. So long as I actually was.

19. Is it important to be a good person?:It depends. I think for the most part yes. But what is a good person actually?

20. Are you a good person? I can be I think. But I also can be a shitty person. I think everyone’s capable of both.

21. How could you become a better personMaybe being less bitter hahahahaha

22. Would/have you ever pierced your genitalia?No. Probably not.

23. Have you ever been in love? If so with how many people?Once. I’ve experienced actually loving someone once in my life. Its powerful and it never goes away.

24. Do you believe in love at first sight? I mean.. yes. I believe in soulmates and such and sometimes when you meet a soul mate or someone supposed to be in your life for whatever reason, I believe love at first site can happen.

25. Which social science interests you most? Psychology, sociology or anthropology? Why? Its definitely a close tie between psychology and anthropology. I love learning how our brains work but I also absolutely love learning about culture so it’s hard to chose just one.

26. Have you ever orgasmed?No. No I havent actually. I try believe me.

27. Have you ever made someone else orgasm?Yes. Yes I have.

28. During sexual interaction what is most important too you?Feeling wanted and feeling safe.

29. Are you comfortable being sexual with lots of people?Not really. I’ve had sex twice with one person in my life and that person took advantage of my both times and then did a shitty thing too me. So sex is a hard subject for me.

30. I dont feel like answering this one sorry guys.

31. What’s your favorite song to sing alot?Uhhhh.. COUNTRY ROADDDSS TAKE ME HOMEE TO THE PLACE. I BELONGGG

32. What’s some “embaressing” music you listen too?Weeb ass music LOL

33. What are you most snobby/pretentious about?UHHH… I dont know really

34. How do you Express sad emotions? And happy emotions?I bottle up sad emotions usually and replace them with laughing and being bitter or angry lol. Sometimes I cry too tho. Happy emotions I just get excited usually I guess.

35. Do you Skype? Facetime?Yepp yep I do. Have been doing that since I was like 13/14

36. How do you feel about phone calls?Eh.. if it’s with someone I love I like them. Otherwise i hate phone calls they make me anxious.

37. How do you feel about texting? I’m most comfortable texting because i usually Express myself better then when I’m word vomiting all over.

38. What are your thoughts on LDRs?They’re hard. And hard work. And they dont always last and survive but when they do it’s a beautiful thing. I’ve been in a few myself..

39. The answer is no I havent. Not yet anyway

40. When and why was the last time you cried?Not long ago. I’ve been crying alot lately. The reason why recently has been the same. Life is overwhelming and I feel an incredible emptiness.. emptiness isn’t even the right word but it’s close. So sometimes I just break down and cry about it. Sometimes I cry because I just dont want to keep fighting for a life in this shitty world but.. I have people in my life who keep me going.

41. What’s something that you love that you never do anymore? Why dont you do it?Draw on paper and write.. I lost my spark I guess. I havent done either of those things besides writing letters to my bestfriend in awhile.

42. Are you afraid to die?No not really. Only afraid of the people I love hurting if I died.

43. If there were no limits, who and what would you be?Id be a mystical as fuck elf okay. Like hell yeah. Or a fairy maybe. Like pls

44. Are you more likely to be a sub or dom during sex?I’m more sub.

45. Describe your fashion senseI wear what I want and what I’m comfortable in. Dresses r life.

46. Do you have stage fright?Yes.

47. Did you ever put your hand up in class?Yes.

48. Are you more of an open or closed person?Uh.. both really.

49. What is the worst thing that has ever happened to you? And the best?Losing my virginity was probably the worst. My bestfriend entering my life is probably the best.

50. Are you a theist? Uhh… well. I’m an agnostic theist if I’m being honest. Dont know what that is? Google is your friend.

51. What are your top three places you want to travel and why?Ireland(and the UK in general) because my roots lie there. Japan because I love Japanese culture and it’s beautiful there. Andd… France. So I have a reason to finish becoming fluent in French.

52. What’s something you thought would be really scary/bad, but when it actually happened it was fine?Rollercoasters. Was terrified now I’m obsessed.

53. When you sleep at a friends house, how often do you sleep in their bed?Uh.. I only have had one friend where I was actually comfortable enough to sleep in their bed, and it was in high school and it took multiple times of her saying I could for me to be like you know what.. okay why not. Platonically sleeping with someone isn’t bad. I was more afraid I’d roll over or something and push her out of her own bed then anything tbh

54. Can you sleep facing someone?I dont know. Never got the chance to experience that to know yet.

55. Do you ever get in slumps? If so how often/long do they happen?Absolutely. All the time. It depends really. They can last a day or a year or feel neverending.

56. Do you like being alone?Most of the time yes. But sometimes I crave being around people.

57. Are you social?I can be.

58. How do you feel about parties?Depends on the party. I like to party definitely but not all parties are fun.

59. Have you ever hosted a party? Howd it go?Yeah I have. It went well. Everyone had fun. Think we even had a line in the backyard for chacha slide lolol

60. What questions do you love to ask people?What’s your zodiac sign?

61. What questions do you live to be asked?I dont know.

62. Are you confrontational? Does it make you uncomfortable when others are?Not usually no. I hate confrontation. And it does make me uncomfortable yes. I have an issue where I’m almost always defensive and it’s because of living with narcissists and people who emotionally abused me my entire life and blamed me for things I didnt do. So I really struggle with the side effects of living that way tbh.

There yall gp. I did it. Bc ily guys

[fish-nibbler]

Didn't read them all but you asked for is so- 1-100 and 1-44 >:3 Also *hugs*

1. What have you eaten today? Uh.. Nothing.. and it’s 5:00 pm

2. Who was your last kiss with? Was it pleasant? My last kiss was with my ex.. awhile a go, before things changed.. and yeah, it was awesome. I hope I can do that with someone again soon

3. What color shoes did you last wear? Black and white converse

4. Who has made you laugh the hardest in the last week?  I haven’t really laughed very hard lately.. but my friend Kat usually gets me to laugh the hardest.

5. What is your favorite scent? Oooo.. I have a few. Lavender, Vanilla, the scent after it rains, fresh linen

6. What is your favorite season? Why? Probably Fall.. It’s not raining all the time, it’s pretty nice out temperature wise(at least before it starts snowing) and the colours of the leaves are really pretty.

7. Can you do a handstand or cartwheel? I haven’t done either in years

8. What color are your nails? uh… normal colour? I haven’t painted my nails in a while

9. If you had to get a tattoo on your face to save your life, what would it be? A tiny star by my eye

10. What is something you find romantic? I haven’t really been able to be in a relationship where anything was “romantic”.. most of my relationships don’t last more than a week and the only one that lasted more than a month is the one where I was being abused.. so.. I don’t really know what I’d consider “romantic”.. maybe stuff like going out to dinners or sitting in a park and looking at the stars.

11. Are you happy? No

12. Is there anything in particular making you happy or sad? I’m pretty broken over my last relationship - I really wanted to have a chance with her but she’s changed a lot.. and she was probably waaay out of my league anyways..

13. Dogs or Cats? Cats

15. Which do you prefer:a museum, a night club, the forest or a library? The forest

15. What is your style? Yoga pants, flannel, baggy sweatshirts, mens/baggy t-shirts, hoodies, leather jackets… I don’t really have a “style” .. I don’t think

16. If you could be doing anything you like right now, what would it be? Being with/ dating one of my crushes.. but uh.. that would be assuming this is a different universe where she doesn’t have a boyfriend.

17. Are you in a relationship or single? Single..

18. What makes you attracted to the person you like right now? Honestly.. After the stuff I just went through with who is now my ex.. I don’t really know.. I feel sorta numb right now. When I said I wanted to be with one of my crushes it’s because I never really got over her after her and I were together.. but right now I don’t know how I feel towards anyone.. or why I like anyone.

19. If you could replace your partner/best friend with a celebrity of your choice, would you? Who with? *cough* Jared Padalecki

20. Are you holding on to something you need to let go of? If so then what? My ex..

21. How did you celebrate last Halloween? I wasted it with some asshat who thought it was a good idea to basically use me as some kind of servant and who thought it would be a good idea to try to make me feel like my depression wasn’t a real thing and she made me think that I was just some kind of freak for always being sad. Her and I don’t talk anymore.

22. Have you recently made any big decisions? Kind of?

23. Were you ever in a school play? Yeah, when I was really little I had to go to a private christian school and it was pretty much required that we participated in plays and reenactments for the church.

24. What movie would you use to describe your life? I don’t think there is one..

25. Is there something you have dreamed of doing for a long time? Why haven’t you done it? I don’t know.. I think there are a lot of smaller things that I want to do. Such as, I really want to get into cosplay.. but the only person who could help me get into cosplay is probably starting to hate my guts(despite what she says) and probably doesn’t want anything to do with me.. so..

26. Complete this sentence, “I wish I had someone with whom I could share…” I wish I had someone with whom I could share my life and my love.

27. What are two things that irritate you about the same sex? Drama. God the drama is terrible.. and the second is probably how easy some women are to wanting to fight. 

28. What are two things that irritate you about the opposite sex? The fact that I swear half the guys at my school either don’t know how to shower or they don’t know how to pull up their pants or, lets see.. guys in my school are always starting fights or they don’t know how to pull their damn pants up or- … lets just say theirs a lot.

29. What is the best thing that has happened to you this week? Nothing. Nothing good happened this week.30. What is something that makes you sad when you think about it? My ex, my cousins who have killed themselves bc they were gay and my family couldn’t accept them, realizing how alone I am because I’m always begging people to spend time with me, realizing that I’m a disappointment to my family, realizing that no one will ever love me in any sense of a relationship.. there’s a lot that makes me sad.

31. How long was your longest relationship? I think 10 months? Almost a year - but the only reason it lasted that long is because she was abusive and was using me.32. Have you ever been in love? Yeah.. then within a month I had my heart torn out, shown to me and then crushed with a tiny hammer. Let’s just say I tried to kill myself after..

33. Are you currently in love? I don’t know..

34. Why did your last relationship end? Because I’m a fucking screw up and I messed everything up. It’s completely my fault.

35. What jewelry are you wearing right now, and where did you get it? I’m not wearing anything right now.

36. When was the last time you cried and why? Earlier today because I hate myself for everything I did to my ex.

37. Name someone pretty. @frozen–roses @yurifreak15 @aerllette

38. What did you receive last Valentines Day? A box of chocolates, I stuffy elephant and some self-hatred.

39. Do you get jealous easily? Kinda… But the sad kind of jealousy where I just feel really lonely.

40. Have you ever been cheated on? Probably.

41. Do you trust your partner/best friend? Yeh

42. Ever had detention? Nope

43. Would you rather live in the countryside or the city? Countryside, there are less lights out there to block the stars

44. What do people call you? Smol, Liz, shorty

45. What was the last book you read? City of Bones

46. How big of a nerd/dork are you? Heck I don’t even know. On a scale of 1-10 probably a 13

47. What kind of music do you listen to? All kinds.. except country

48. How tall are you? 5ft(152.4 cm)

49. Do you like kids? Noooooooo

50. Favorite fruits? Tomatoes, watermelon

51. Do you wear jeans or sweats more? Neither, I swear yoga pants

52. What’s your earliest memory? I don’t know right now..

53. Ever had a poem or song written about you or to you? HA I wish

54. Do you prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it? Behind

55. Do you have a collection of anything? No.. My mom made me throw them away

56. Do you save money or spend it? Save

57. What would your dream house be like? Small and cozy

58. What top 5 things make you the angriest? Idiots. Lying. Breaking promises. Animal abuse. Ruining/touching other people’s art projects without permission.

59. What top 5 things always brings a smile to your face? I don’t know..

60. You are walking down the street on your way to work. There is a dog drowning in the canal on the side of the street. Your boss has told you if you are late one more time you get fired. What do you do? Fuck it, save the dog, I can hope that if my boss has a heart he’ll let me go this time.61. 72: You are at the doctor’s office and she has just informed you that you have approximately one month to live. a) Do you tell anyone/everyone you are going to die? b) What do you do with your remaining days? c) Would you be afraid? a) I don’t tell many people that I’m dying; b) I’d try to have fun with people, maybe try drugs, maybe try drinking and I would for sure have sex with someone.. ooo, or make it interesting and with a few people..hmm; c) I don’t think I would be afraid, I think I would just be anxious

62. Give me the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word; heart. Love.

63. You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go? OOOoo!! Germany! Or Japan!!

64. Do you like the beach? Eh.. kinda

65. Ever sleep on the couch or a bed with someone special? Technically yes.. but it was after I was guilt tripped into having sex with them and had a panic attack during.. it was pretty scarring..

66. Do you have a middle name? If so what is it! I do have one! My middle name is Patricia

67. Do you talk to yourself? Yes, all the time

68. Describe your hair. Short, really soft and fluffy

69. What is the meaning of life. 42

70. What is your ideal partner like? Taller than me, definitely the more dom of the relationship, really nice and patient… typical stuff

71. Do you want to get married? Yeh!

72. Do you want to have kids? Nooooo

73. Like or dislike your family? I like a couple people.. I dislike most of them.

74. Are you Chunky or Slim? Sorta in between

75. Would you consider yourself smart? No

76. What would you change about your life? Almost everything..

77. Religious or Not? Nope

78. You’re drunk and yelling at hot guys/girls out of your car window, you’re with? Shit I don’t know who’d I be with but I’d hope I’d have a sweet night with one of those hot women.

79. You’re locked in a room with the last person you kissed, is that a problem? It might be.. I don’t know.. she’d probably just avoid me..

80. Does anyone regularly (other than family) tell you they love you? No..

81. If the person you wish to be with were with you, what would you be doing right now? Falling asleep in their arms..

82. So, the last person you kissed just happens to arrive at your door at 3AM; do you let them in? Yes..

83. Do you like when people play with your hair? Yeah.. I find it really calming

84. Do you like bubble baths?Yes!

85. Have you ever been pulled over by a cop? Yeah, but only for a burnt out tail light

86. Have you ever danced in the rain? Nope

87. Do you trust anyone with your life? Eh.. I don’t know.. Sort of lost that trust when I told people I wanted to kill myself and they laughed at me..

88. What was your first thought when you woke up this morning? “Why am I such a screw up?”

89. If money wasn’t an issue, what top 10 places would you travel to? (You get to stay at each place for a week) Germany, England, Canada, Ireland, Iceland, Japan, California, Washington DC(again), Poland, and maybe Texas

90. How was your day today? Eh.. It sucked..

91. Play an instrument? I play the flute, and I’m trying to learn how to play the piano

92. Describe the what you think of the ocean. No. Nope. Not doing it.

93. Do you believe in aliens or ghosts? Kinda, I mean.. I believe there’s something else out there.

94. Honestly, are things how you wanted them to be? No.

95. Do you have a mean bitchy scary side? Depends on if you are able to piss me off. 

96. When are you vulnerable? Always.

97. How much free time do you have? A lot

98. Do you like to go hiking? Yeah! I just don’t always get to and I usually come home covered in ticks..

99. Odd or Even Numbers? Both?

100. Would you ever go sky diving, bungee jumping , cliff diving, wing suit gliding, parasailing, snorkeling, or other extreme activities? Sure! I’d be willing to try.

1. Any scars? Many

2. Self harmed? Yes

3. Crush? Lets not talk about it anymore

4. Kissed anyone? Yes

5. Coke or Pepsi?  Pepsi

6. Someone you hate? My abusive ex

7. Best Friends? Yeh

8. Have you ever done alcohol or drugs? I wish

9. What’s your dream job?  Uhh.. I don’t know

10. Ever been in love? Yeah.. It didn’t end well.

11. Last time you cried? Today

12. Favorite color? Lavender, shades of blue

13. Height? 5ft

14. Birthday? April 13th

15. Eye color? Blue and Grey

16. Hair color? Brown

17. What do you love? Snuggles.

18. Obsession? ...uhhh.. I dunno..

19. If you had one wish, what would it be? To be loved

20. Do you love someone? My ex.. Though I know I need to get over her..

21. Kiss or hug? Depends on who you are

22. Nicknames people call you? Liz, Smol, Shorty, ..cute

23. Favorite song? Lost Boy

24. Favorite band? Panic! At the Disco

25. Worst thing that has ever happened to you? One of my exes(not the most resent)

26. Best thing that has ever happened to you? The last person I dated.. she was the best thing that had ever happened to me..

27. Something you would change about yourself? Everything

28. Ever dated someone? Yeah

29. Worst mistake? There are a lot..

30. Watch the movie or read the book? Both

31. Ever had a heartbreak? Yeah

32. Favorite show? Right now: Archer.

33. Best day of your life? I dunno..

34. Any talents? Uh... 

35. Do you wish you could ever start over? Yes

36. Any bad habits? Cutting..

37. Ever had a near death experience? Probably a few

38. Someone I can tell anything to? My best friend, Elena

39. Ever lost a loved one? A lot..

40. Do you believe in love? Yes

41. Someone you hate/Dislike? again, one of my exes. She was a manipulative asshat who guilt tripped me into having sex with her and then laughing when she hurt me.

42. Are you okay? No.

43. Relationship status? Single

44. Selfie? I’ll post one later when I have better lighting