#baz this one's for you

[applestorms]

EVANGELION.

context: i just (as in, within an hour of beginning this post) finished watching evangelion, including both the tv series & the end of evangelion the movie. i have not read the manga, or watched any of the remake (?) movies yet (though i plan to shortly). my brain is thus running at like mach 10 rn trying to keep all of these thoughts in order, so to preserve these initial reflections while they're still fresh, here is the evangelion post. no worries if you're following me for other stuff, we'll be back to regular programming soon enough, but i can't let this shit stew on my own for much longer.

SUMMARY: 7 sections, on agency, sartre, shounen expectations, freud & generational trauma, queer shit, hope, & anime budgets. obvious spoiler warning.

1. agency (does shinji actually have any choices?)

this idea is one of the first to stand out to me while watching, and was also the most personally satisfying to watch develop since it only gained relevancy throughout the series + held major significance in EoE.

essentially: every single time that shinji has a "darkest hour" moment throughout the series, typically revolving around him not wanting to fight/kill/destroy/etc. while piloting the eva, someone around him will tell him that it is his decision whether or not he wants to continue fighting. most often this person is misato, though there is also an instance of kaji doing it in the later part of the show. significantly, while this "choice" is always framed as a decision that shinji himself is allowed to make, to join their forces and fight or not, it is very clearly not actually a decision at all- even ignoring the obvious...emotional stress of telling a 14 year old that he can either get back in the goddamn robot no matter how traumatizing it is to him and fight or single-handedly cause the extinction of humanity, shinji can never truly leave nerv and this only becomes more apparent the more time that passes.

that's all quite obvious in my mind, but what's notable here is the progression, both in terms of how the decision itself is presented to him, and how the continual fake-out of giving shinji any actual agency carves at his psyche.

in terms of the first, it is very clear, above all else, that shinji absolutely does not want to fight in the fuckign robot, which is demonstrated through the fact that every single time he is given the "choice" to leave, he takes it and runs away, no matter how dire the situation is. shinji does not want to be a shounen protagonist, dammit, but time and time again he is dragged back into the same position and, most importantly, taught that his choices mean nothing. from the first few episodes where he runs away from home, to EoE where misato drags him through a parking lot and throws him into an elevator while telling him to fight, time and time again shinji's agency is violently taken away from him in the name of the continuation? transformation? of humanity, and i think that from his complete lack of desire to do literally anything in EoE we can tell he is aware of this.

what's really significant about all of this, then, is the way that this message influences the few instances where shinji actually does have some semblance of agency. in particular, i'm thinking about the gay angel (THE GAY ANGEL) and the ending of EoE.

so, first: the gay angel. kaworu. i say "semblance of agency," since shinji is kind of just given the same decision here as everywhere else, but this one is presented pretty & executed (ouch) pretty differently so i wanna talk about it.

kaworu is a very different character from everyone else in the cast for the primary reason that he is not particularly caught up in his own bullshit. he shows up at a time when shinji basically has no one (the trust "darkest hour" of the whole series, really) and is notable in that he openly and easily gives him love and time when no one else is really able to. this could in part be attributed to his status as an angel, but i think it goes further too- more on this in the section about generational trauma.

anyways, the decision to kill kaworu is phrased very differently from the previous "choices" offered to shinji by misato. rather than telling shinji that he has a choice in the same vague terms as before, to fight or not fight, kaworu kinda just tells him straight up- either he can kill kaworu, the one person who mutually loves and cared for him at a time when literally no one else was able to and thereby give humanity a chance at continuation, or he can hold off and let kaworu live but cause the destruction he has been pulled into staving off for the entire series. loneliness or annihilation- those are shinji's two choices here, and kaworu is very open about which one he prefers, citing the good that humanity has brought forward. i actually think that misato is wrong in her interpretation of this scene (lots of misato slander here whoops, i swear i love her)- kaworu isn't offering up his life here out of a lack of care for himself, but rather an overwhelming care for shinji as an individual and humanity as a collective.

from shinji's perspective though, this is basically the same agonizing moral dilemma he has been forced to "decide" for the last 16 angels, and he knows by this point what the answer is supposed to be. it's what's so truly tragic about this moment to me- even if kaworu meant this to be a genuine decision for shinji to make, accepting the consequences of his choice fully either way, shinji was never going to be able to see it that way after having the "correct" answer forced upon him again and again. he might be able to scramble for a justification in the aftermath, rationalizing it as his own (supposedly) disgusting need for validation, but he was never actually allowed to decide any other way and he knows it. even if shinji would ultimately choose in favor of the continuation of humanity & continue fighting, the decision itself is so tainted* by this point that it doesn't really matter, since no one could ever really know the truth.

*(this lack of a decision could also be attributed to an inability for anyone to truly trust shinji- see section 2 on sartre for more on this dissonance.)

there is, however, one instance where shinji truly is given an actual choice, which coincidentally also includes kaworu but also rei at the end of EoE. here the choice is a bit different though, instead being between the continuation of humanity in its collective, gelatinous blob state or broken back up into separate entities.

since humanity has already been eradicated (hey callback to kaworu's presence marking the ultimate end of humanity, he came back for more than just to comfort shinji & be a thematic parallel to denote his "true" choices), i think shinji is able to view this decision much more clearly and thus seems a lot more satisfied with his ultimate choice. there's a lot of nuances to this of course, as evidenced by the ending with asuka, but past that i think the fact that both the tv series & EoE end with shinji coming to some sort of satisfied (if mostly theoretical) conclusion that seems to leave him with a marginally happier emotional state is pretty meaningful, especially considering just how little emotional development these characters go through in general (see sections 3 & 4).

what's particularly satisfying about all this though is the fact that shinji seems to actually engage with this idea himself in one of previously mentioned conclusions. the ending of the tv show is essentially just shinji realizing that he does in fact have agency and has had it all along, even if not in the biggest/most overwhelming situations he was forced into. personally, i read this as shinji not only becoming consciously aware of his own learned helplessness, but also the fact that he has actually been making decisions for himself all along and is able to continue doing so, that he can take back his agency for himself through the conscious decision to keep making meaningful connections with others- a very beauvoirean conclusion, which is gonna become real significant real fast as we get into this next section. up next: sartre.

2. sartre (shinji/asuka/rei as no exit, ft. good place parallels)

no exit is a 1944 existentialist play written by the french philosopher jean-paul sartre. in it, three people (two women, & one man, by the names of estelle, inez, and garcin) are sent to hell and locked in a room together, destined to torture one another for the rest of eternity. the most well known line from it is likely "Hell is other people," a conclusion the character garcin comes to near the end of the play as the group realizes the truth of their circumstances.

there are some obvious connections here- the three main characters from no exit pretty easily map onto the three main pilots (estelle -> asuka, garcin -> shinji, and more lightly inez -> rei). the cycle of torture even follows as well, with a possible interpretation of the pilots' dynamic being that asuka tortures shinji (see section 5; tldr it's all the degradation), rei tortures asuka (her silence heightening asuka's insecurities), and shinji tortures rei (less obvious, but hinted at through things like rei's emotional attachment to shinji which seems to at least scare her for how strange it is).

past that though, the sartrean elements of this story become super fucking clear in the last few episodes, coming down to two big ideas that shinji frets over: freedom as a curse, and hell as other people.

the "condemnation of freedom," idea is kind of tied up with the whole shinji agency thing discussed in section 1, and since i don't think i can elaborate on it much more here without doing a whole deep dive on the philosophy, i'll just focus on the second idea, especially since it's one of the emotional cores that the story revolves around.

the idea that "hell is other people," as stated by garcin in the original play really comes down to one main factor and that is the dissonance between how we view ourselves & how other people view us. in the show, this is presented through the hedgehog allegory (also related to western philosophy but i know sartre better so i'm gonna keep talking about him here) and the idea that in the process of getting closer to one another we also hurt each other more, but i think the sartrean idea lends a bit more light onto the whole conflict of perspectives thing that the hedgehog idea along misses out on.

it's pretty clear imo that shinji has some kind of social anxiety, or at the very least is dealing with a lot of the normal anxiety that comes with growing up and beginning to desire validation (from your peers, from your guardians, etc.). the entire point of EoE as a film and seemingly the very basis for the concept of AT fields is the idea that humanity is separate, with individual humans never being able to truly connect with one another. ignoring the more esoteric & absurd ways this is portrayed in-movie, this idea is pretty easy to get on board with- relationships change over time, people fight and become close and fall apart, and that is largely just a natural fact of life. again, the inability to accept this fact is going to be examined more in section 4, but i think shinji is key in connecting the hedgehog thing to sartre.

near the end of EoE, when everyone is getting exploded into orange goop and melted into the human soup, it is notable that the way everyone gets incorporated is by a rei transforming into the person that they seem to have wanted to connect with the most (shinji's dad with his mom, but also maya w/ akagi and hyuga w/ misato), again tying back to that theme of desiring a more "true"/deeper connection between people. at the end of the tv series, however, this is slightly different due to the look we get into shinji's mind. specifically, shinji doesn't just desire a relationship (platonic, romantic, and/or sexual) or validation from other people, but is caught up in the way that he is perceived by others. the separation between people is thus torturous to him not in how it means he can't truly connect with other people, but in how he can't control the ways that other people view or understand or react to him.

i think this is a part of why shinji seems to have a much easier time with his end decision in EoE- despite all the underlying freudian psychosexual development shit that permeates through some of the weirder parts of NGE, shinji seems to me to care a lot more about how other people view him than the specific types of connections he is able to make, e.g. he still considers his relationship with asuka to be a key point of meaning in his life, despite how turbulent/messy it is. for a kid who struggled with social interactions a lot growing up, any deeper connection is pretty meaningful to him by this point, and it shows. this also could be attributed to being a part of the greater influence of kaworu, as the fact that he cared so deeply and so meaningfully about shinji (and the opposite as well) may have been proof to him that any "deeper" connections aren't really necessary or worthwhile, even before he got mixed up into the people soup.*

*ALSO: didn't think about this until later, but there's also the whole process of connecting with the evas that the pilots have to go through to think about here.

**ALSO 2: if you didn't already know, the good place is also very overtly based on no exit. this means there's actually a kinda random parallel between tgp & evangelion in that they both happen to add a fourth individual through the introduction of a fourth dude (jason & kaworu respectively) that mixes shit up even more. neat.

so, speaking of the various endings:

3. the ending does make some sense, actually (dropping shounen expectations)

one of the things that i was most impressed by while watching evangelion, especially around the mid-point of the tv series around the time that asuka is introduced, is the fact that they were able to make what would otherwise be pretty standard anime fan service a genuinely meaningful part of the story's underlying themes, in particular those related to the freud shit (getting there soon, i promise) but also just the general connections to biology and humanity and development.

i don't think evangelion should be watched or understood like a traditional shounen show, and in fact it kind of goes against the underlying emotional core of story to try and force that kind of reading onto it. like, okay, take shinji for example- like i said a couple sections back, one of shinji's key character traits is the fact that he doesn't want to be a fucking shounen protagonist and hates being forced into that position, but keeps getting dragged back to nerv and EVA 01 anyway.

i think it's notable that the few moments where shinji has what might be considered a "traditional" epic shounen hero moment could very easily be read as not even being shinji's own actions in the first place, but the eva itself due to them 1. not showing shinji's face during the moment, just his fear before and trauma after, and 2. being motivated by shinji's extreme fear, giving more of the vibe of a mother protecting her child than shinji making progress on his own.

none of the main cast really seem to go through any super significant character development throughout the entirety of both the show and movie, actually- the closest we get is whatever the hell rei was doing and the breakthroughs in thought that shinji has at the very very end of either production, but that's about it.

what i think makes this important is the fact that it points towards what the actual emotional core that the show centers around. what sets evangelion apart from other shounen shows, imo, is the fact that it takes a hard look at the apocalyptic world that it created and really takes the time to reflect on how that kind of trauma would actually influence its characters. i haven't seen a ton of in-depth negative reviews of the ending of NGE, but i'm guessing that a major factor in the potential frustration with the ending is the fact that it drops a lot of the overt plot elements in favor of more a more abstract look into shinji's mind. but i think that look is entirely the point of the ending- it was never really about the robots, or at least not by the end of the series, so the ending focuses on the emotional payoff of at least one character instead to find the barest glimmer of hope leftover.

this is part of why i find kaworu to be such a significant character- one of the key conclusions that shinji seems to come to at the end of the tv series is the idea that "you have to love yourself in order to love other people," but i actually don't know if that's entirely true or even demonstrated in the series. kaworu is the first person to really demonstrate to shinji that he is capable of loving and being loved, and despite the tragedy of that relationship, i think it was a core part of shinji's eventual first step towards self-acceptance.

4. freud & generational trauma (everyone is ultimately just an abused child)

ok fuck it, i've been talking about this for ages, let's just fucking get to it already.

i'm nowhere near an expert on freud, really i only have a pretty baseline understanding (thanks to a high school ap psych class) of the psychosexual stages of development thing that the show references a lot in the later parts (the oral fixation thing w/ misato, etc.), so rather than looking into the details of that, i think the big thing here for me is how the use of freud influences the ideas that the show focuses on. namely, as we see through the last few episodes of the tv series: everyone is just a sad, traumatized, abused kid.

i also think that what the inclusion of all the freud shit ultimately does for this series is give it a big emphasis on biological human development and family relations, which feels especially significant in how it can tie into a more subtle, but imo still very important idea: generational trauma, told through the story of the end of the world.

what i like about this idea is that it's really where the story begins, chronologically in the timeline and in episode 1 with shinji & gendo. the idea then evolves and expands the more parent/child relationships we learn about, from misato and her father to asuka, akagi, and, at least in part, rei.

similar to how the series utilizes its religious themes & imagery to get back to the origins/sources of humanity (namely adam & lilith), i like to think of the second impact as the source of this initial trauma. because of the second impact, we are basically guaranteed that every single adult present in the series has dealt with some degree of trauma, though in many cases this expands to other things as well (e.g. gendo struggling with social connections & misato's tricky relationship with her father, both of which are established pre-impact).

what's really big though is how this initial trauma influences the next generation of kids, especially the main trio of eva pilots (& their respective mother-related machinery) but really all of their classmates as well. toji, to some degree kensuke, really every kid born after or around the time of the second impact seems to similarly deal with the echoes of this initial trauma. if you want to, you could maybe even relate back to the very first impact of the lilith egg as a source as well, each new impact being an echo of the previous through the continuation of generational traumas.

TLDR: the freud shit doesn't have to just be freud shit, the fucked up family relations can be read through the lens of generational trauma as well.

5. queer shit (THE GAY ANGEL)

when i say queer shit here i'm really talking about gender roles, which is ESPECIALLY important when talking about shinji's two main crushes: kaworu and asuka (sticking with those two for now since they're the most overt, but they're not necessarily the only ones you can read into btw).

the big thing here is that imo the main factor that makes shinji's relationship with asuka (in particular, but really all of the women in the show) so difficult is the weight that heterosexual relationships have. again, much of evangelion's imagery is heavily focused on biology, specifically in terms of development both as a baby is developed & in puberty, and i think that weight is felt in the awkward relationships shinji has with all the girls he's suddenly been surrounded by.

this is in part why i think it was so much easier for shinji to get on board with kaworu, and why the relationship itself was so meaningful to him- because there's no threat of MARRY A WOMAN BONE HAVE A CHILD REPRODUCE CONTINUE THE HUMAN RACE (the last one in particular being especially relevant in the post-apocalyptic hellscape they're all trapped in), shinji is able to focus entirely on the personal emotional aspects of the relationship and the ability to find meaning through human connection, which again is a very beauvoirean idea.*

*i think i kinda skipped over this in the sartre section but beauvoir was a contemporary of sartre that influenced a lot of his philosophy especially later on so the fact that shinji's end conclusion seems so reminiscent of beauvoir is very satisfying.

this is not to say that shinji's relationship with asuka or any of the women around him wasn't meaningful or revolving around genuine feelings on his part, just that the weight of social expectations particularly in the context of male/female gender roles is a constant factor at the back of his mind when trying to navigate all these new social situations.

this is also not just an issue that shinji deals with- asuka herself is constantly the one to call shinji out for not being enough of a real man, which shinji actually rarely mentions all that directly, only caring when asuka herself mentions it, and i personally read her struggles with sexuality and desire to be seen as an adult as a part of her deeper issues with the woman gender role. misato kind of deals with the same thing actually, and even akagi in how they all have such tricky relationships with their own sexuality and the men around them. again, i think the whole dissonance between differing perceptions idea is relevant here, especially when considering the ways that women deal with objectification, both in terms of how others view them and how they're taught to present themselves.

6. no development but lasting hope? (making sense of EoE)

i kind of already talked about this, but expanding on the idea that everyone is ultimately still just an abused kid looking for solutions to the problems they were raised to have, i think it's significant within the imagery of the show that the world post-second impact is eternally spring/summer, meaning that even the environment the characters are trapped in itself is unable to develop or grow, stuck in the same cycle of infancy & puberty with no real adulthood. the constant threat of the angels and/or third impact also adds to this, with characters rushing to get married and form relationships (as misato & akagi talk about in one episode) but never getting the chance to properly grow old before they die.

this implies however that the existence of an autumn/winter is potentially in the future, that growth can come eventually and hope is still present. i'm not entirely sure yet what to make of the ending of EoE- i actually really like how the tone shifts so drastically immediately following such an emotionally heavy, complicated sequence, but i also don't think it's entirely without hope. it's the same old as before, maybe a relapse, maybe a reaction the traumas that initially happened, but. i mean she doesn't actually die??? my big conclusion is still a work in progress i suppose.

7. bonus: this isn't low budget it's goddamn beautiful, watch utena

i've been writing this "short reflection" for like two days straight already, this section is basically just the title. watch utena for more fucked up shit with an actually low budget. frankly this video explains the low budget thing better and has a better justification so i'll just direct you there. (yes this connection is about the therapy elevators.)

[manny-jacinto]

every film maker should have one thing in mind: will this be a good gif?

[singersalvageart]

THIS WAY TO THE VAMPIRE‼

[letraspal]

Happy Birthday Baz Pitch! Never forget you were brought to this world with love.

(Also, happy birthday to the one and only @rainbowrowell)

[foreverdolly]

ೃ࿔FOREVERDOLLY'S AUSTIN BUTLER MASTERLIST

"𝙞 𝙬𝙖𝙣𝙩 𝙩𝙤 𝙝𝙤𝙡𝙙 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙘𝙡𝙤𝙨𝙚. 𝙨𝙤𝙛𝙩 𝙗𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙨𝙩𝙨, 𝙗𝙚𝙖𝙩𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙝𝙚𝙖𝙧𝙩. . . "

✶ TATTOOED HEART ONESHOT (BIKER!AUSTIN X READER)

austin is the club president of a local outlaw biker gang- a one percenter. he lies, he kills and he doesn't apologize for it. he was one weakness- you. when he gets a distressed late night call from you he's quick to come to your rescue. the only problem? your own father was in the same motorcycle club that austin now runs, and after his death you cut all contact. when you two see each other again emotions run high and things get. . . a little out of control.

total word count: 12.1k

✶ BABY BUTLER MASTERLIST (DAD! AUSTIN X MOM!READER) COMPLETED

you get pregnant while in australia, your husband still in the process of filming for the elvis biopic. this series follows you and austin as you both navigate being first-time parents whilst in the public eye.

total word count: 8.7k

✶ BABY LOVE ONESHOT (DOM!AUSTIN X SELF CONSCIOUS!READER)

you've gained some “relationship” weight since you and austin first started dating, and you find yourself growing more and more self conscious as time goes on. austin takes his time letting you know just how beautiful he finds you.

total word count: 3.6k

✶ OOPSIE DAISY ONESHOT (AUSTIN X INJURED!READER)

austin tries to protect you from journalists and paparazzi. he get's big time mad when one of them get's a little too close to you.

total word count: 2.4k

✶ ARE YOU MINE ONESHOT (EX'S BEST FRIEND!AUSTIN X READER)

after a bad breakup with your cheating ex, the last thing you’re expecting is for his best friend to side with you. at his insistence, you decide to let him accompany you to the arctic monkey concert in las vegas. what happens in las vegas doesn’t always stay in las vegas.

total word count: 13.1k

✶ FAKE DATING MASTERLIST (BOSS!AUSTIN X EMPLOYEE!READER)

you absolutely can't stand your boss. after one bad run in with him, you decide that he's office enemy number one. so when your mother breaks the news that your ex boyfriend is bringing his new fiancé to your sister's wedding as his plus one, you lie and tell her you'll be bringing your very own boyfriend along with you to greece. the problem? you don't actually have a boyfriend. so when austin butler, your arch nemesis of a boss, offers to be your fake boyfriend, you have to take him up on it. greece is a beautiful place to fall in love, no?

total word count: 21.5k

✶ TEAR YOU APART (BIKER!AUSTIN X READER)

"I want it to hurt" and "quit being such a brat"

total word count: 1.8k

✶ I JUST RIDE MASTERLIST (80's MECHANIC! AUSTIN X BEST FRIEND! READER)

it's starting to look like he might never make it out of the friend zone. austin has been in love with you for as long as he can remember, and he's terrified that you'll never see him as anything more than a best friend and protector. with the fear of you one day outgrowing him fresh on his mind, he's now hell bent on getting you to view him in a different light. madly in love and terrified to lose you, austin butler is playing for keeps.

total word count: 8.5k

✶ SHOTGUN WEDDING ONESHOT (AUSTIN!TEX WATSON X KIDNAPPED!READER)

the year is 1969 and you find yourself lucky enough to live up in the hollywood hills, spending your days dancing away to your favorite rock n’ roll vinyls in an old farmhouse and looking after your wild roommates. the only problem? you’ve caught the eye of tex watson. how does he spend his days? making moves towards finally getting everything that he could ever want. you.

total word count: 16.5k

✶ DASHBOARD JESUS ONESHOT (AUSTIN!TEX WATSON X READER)

"I can't. . .please. . . I can't take it anymore." and "good boy."

total word count: 2.5k

wanna be notified any time i post austin butler content? go ahead and like/comment on this post to stay connected !

← go back to the masterlist guide

"𝙖𝙨 𝙞 𝙬𝙝𝙞𝙨𝙥𝙚𝙧 𝙞𝙣 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙚𝙖𝙧 ' 𝙞 𝙬𝙖𝙣𝙣𝙖 𝙛𝙪𝙘𝙠𝙞𝙣' 𝙩𝙚𝙖𝙧 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙖𝙥𝙖𝙧𝙩 '. . . "

[iamamythologicalcreature]

Carry On Through the Ages (all the way back to Ancient Egypt)

"A Prophesied Rivalry:

This painting, remarkably well-preserved, was recovered from the tomb of a previously unknown and as-yet unidentified woman of significant power, whose rediscovery has fascinated Egyptologists. Historical analysis suggests she was believed to possess a gift for prophecy, and this artwork is very likely an attempt to illustrate one of her visions.

Here, she and her husband are depicted championing their son, who faces an outsider in combat. The outsider is also supported by an enigmatic figure of seemingly great power, foretelling a great struggle between two mighty forces, though whether these forces were meant to be supernatural or more mundane is not clear.

The dog shown, intriguingly, held a place of honor within the family and was found interred in a nearby chamber. The cat's presence, however, remains enigmatic, as the "Cats vs Dogs" reputation cultivated by these domesticated animals today is not something observed elsewhere in Ancient Egyptian artwork. Noted Egyptologists Miriam Blackwood and Theodore Langston have half-jokingly speculated that its inclusion was a mere artistic preference, hinting at the painter’s fondness for cats."

I've always loved Ancient Egyptian art, ever since childhood. I've wanted to do something like this ever since I first read of Baz's ancestry, so @carryonthroughtheages seemed the best excuse to dabble in this ancient art style.

I talked to @monbons about it and apparently the stars and planets were in alignment that day, because she agreed to collaborate with me. She’s created some absolutely gorgeous fiber art to go along with Natasha’s prophecies. And then she surprised me with a Baz doll, because she is amazing. (I love him so much and we are going to look at fashion books together. It’s going to be awesome.)

This is definitely fanart of both Ancient Egyptian art and Snowbaz. Both are worth diving into if you find yourself curious to know more!

[stephstars08]

Jealous

Austin Butler x Reader

Warnings: Long Intro (Sorry!), Angst, Mention of Jealous!Austin, Some Adult Language, Tension, Suspicion, Mention of Cheating, Fluff, and Possibly Some Grammar Errors. (Sorry if I forgot any!)

Summary: Y/N is a photographer who takes pictures for movies and tv shows. Y/N and Austin met on the set of Elvis and became a couple right after the production of the movie wrapped up. They have been together ever since then and everything had been going great between them till Y/N hired a male assistant that causes fights between her and Austin due to his jealousy.

Word Count: 2,188

Author’s Note: Here is my first Austin Butler one shot for all of the Austin girls out there! I hope you all enjoy it and let me know what you all think!

Y/N is a photographer for celebrities who star in movies and tv shows. She’s worked on a couple small films that got released on streaming services. The biggest movie she has worked on so far in her career so far is Baz Luhrmann’s Elvis. Y/N took all the pictures of the cast and did all of the promotional photos for the movie. She even got to take pictures of the cast behind the scenes as well.

Y/N got along well with the whole cast and crew especially the star of the film, Austin Butler who played Elvis. Austin was the first actor Y/N met on set and they instantly connected. They were always around each other on and off the set. Since Y/N and Austin were staying in houses that weren’t that far away from each other they would take turns hanging out at each others residence.

As time went on everyone knew that Y/N and Austin were quickly falling for each other hard. But, as the production continued neither one took the big step which was ask the other person out on a date. The only thing that has happened between the two is just flirting.

As time went on Y/N really wanted to go to the next level with Austin but she was too shy and is never the type of girl to ask a hot guy out on a date. Y/N was always hoping that Austin would make the move but she also knew that right when Elvis started production he had just got out of a long term and serious relationship with someone else, so he was most likely not ready for another relationship.

As the production of Elvis was coming to an end, Y/N really thought that nothing was going to happen between her and Austin till the last day on set, Olivia the actress who played Pricilla in the film, convinced Y/N to just take a chance and just ask Austin out on a date. Olivia told her that it was going to be her and possibly last chance to do it. Y/N knew that Olivia was a hundred percent right, so she used all of the confidence she had and asked Austin out on a date and he said yes. Ever since that first date, Y/N and Austin have been together as a couple.

They live together in a condo that’s right on the beach in California. Even though their careers have made them have a long-distance relationship they were still unbreakable. Everything had been going perfect till just two months ago. Y/N had hired an assistant named Drake. Since Y/N was getting hired to do so many photoshoots she was having trouble doing everything on her own so that’s when she hired Drake.

In the beginning Austin had no problem with Y/N having a male assistant till he met Drake. Every-time Austin was around Drake would act super rude towards him. The only time Drake played nice with Austin was if Y/N was in the room. It drove Austin crazy. Austin also couldn’t help but get extra jealous when Drake would be spending so much time with Y/N because he hated the way Drake looked at Y/N and the way Drake acted around Y/N. It’s like Drake is being rude on purpose.

Austin feels like Drake is trying to push Austin out of the picture. However, when Austin would mention Drake’s behavior to Y/N she would just brush him off which always led to an argument between the couple.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Y/N was peacefully sleeping when she got woken up by her alarm clock blaring. Y/N let out a soft sigh as she opened her eyes and snoozed the alarm. When she rolled over onto her back, she saw the other side of the king-sized bed empty. Flashbacks of her fight with Austin last night flashed through her mind.

This was the worst argument they have ever had. It was so bad and intense that Austin decided to sleep downstairs on the couch. Of course, it was another stupid argument about Drake. Y/N doesn’t understand why Austin gets so jealous. He is the only one she wants to be with. Austin always tells her that she is so oblivious to Drake’s actions.

Y/N could feel her eyes start to water due to the flashbacks, so she wiped the tears away from her eyes and got out of bed. She got changed into a fresh pair of clothes and went into the bathroom connected to the bedroom to brush her hair and teeth. She decided to put her hair up into a ponytail since the photoshoot she’s working on today is going to be outside and since she moves around a lot, she gets hot real fast. After she finished in the bathroom, she walked back into the bedroom to put on a pair of her comfy sneakers. She grabbed her phone off the charger and put it in her back pocket of her blue jeans. She grabbed her big bag that had her laptop and camera in and wrapped the bag’s strap around her shoulder.

Y/N walked out of the bedroom and down the stairs. When Y/N walked into the living room she saw the pillow and blanket Austin used last night laying on one end of the couch. The blanket was placed on top of the pillow that was laying flat on the couch cushion. She knew that Austin had to be in the kitchen. Y/N took a deep breath and walked into the kitchen where Austin was sitting at the kitchen island drinking a cup of coffee.

Y/N immediately felt the tension between her and Austin right when she walked into the room. Y/N didn’t say anything to him as she walked over to the counter where the coffee machine was. She got out one of her traveling mugs from the cabinet and poured some coffee into the mug.

“Do you want me to fix you something quick to eat?” Austin asked breaking the tension that was floating in the air. “No.” Y/N answered not looking at him. “I’m just going to stop somewhere before I go to my office.” Y/N added as she put the lid on her cup.

“Listen Y/N about what happened last night I- “Austin started to say but she cut him off. “Austin, I have a big photoshoot today so if you want to continue last nights conversation you can wait till, I get home.” Y/N told him as she looked over at him with a stern look in her eyes. Austin just gave her a nod and took a sip of his coffee.

Y/N grabbed her keys off one of the hooks on the wall and walked out the door. She didn’t have the energy or motivation to say I love you or goodbye to Austin which did scare her. What if the next fight she gets in with him it’s so bad that they end up breaking up?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Y/N just finished up her long photoshoot for an upcoming film and was packing up her equipment with the help of Drake. After they packed all of the equipment into Y/N’s car they got into the vehicle to go back to Y/N’s office. Y/N let Drake drive since she was so tired from the shoot. The whole car ride back to the office was quiet which concerned Drake since she actually hasn’t spoken much to him all day. Right when they got back to the office, they carried all the equipment inside.

“Are you okay?” Drake asked her with concern in his voice as Y/N was packing her laptop and camera back into her bag. “You’ve been really quiet today.” Drake added which made Y/N let out a sigh. “I just had a rough night last night.” Y/N told him looking over at him after she zipped up her bag. “Another fight with Austin I’m guessing.” Drake said which he got a nod from Y/N as the answer.

Drake is the person Y/N talks about all of the arguments she has with Austin. “This fight got so bad he slept on the couch.” Y/N told him.” Damn, sorry to hear that.” Drake said as he shook his head.

“I don’t know why he gets so jealous of the bond we have. He should know that I would never cheat on him.” Y/N said with nothing but frustration in her voice. It hurts her that Austin would ever think that she would cheat on him. Especially with how long they have been together. They have been through a lot together.

“Yeah, if anything it should be the other way around.” Drake said which quickly confused her. “What do you mean by that?” Y/N asked him with a mixture of confusion and curiosity in her voice. “If one of you was to cheat it would be him.” Drake told her which took her by surprise. “No, Austin would never cheat on me.” Y/N told him in a stern tone which made Drake let out a harsh laugh. “He’s an actor Y/N. Isn’t that what always happens. He could get casted in a movie with a pretty girl and end up cheating on you with the actress behind the scenes. It’s happened so many times throughout Hollywood.” Drake told her.

Hearing Drake say this about Austin wasn’t just taking her by surprise, but it was also pissing her off. “Get out!” Y/N hissed now taking him by surprise. “What?” Drake asked her in shock. “I’m not going to let you stand here and talk shit about Austin when you don’t even fucking know him like I do so get the hell out!” Y/N told him in a snappy tone. “You’re firing me?” Drake asked still in shock. “That’s what I mean when I say get out!” Y/N told him as she folded her arms over her chest. “Get your shit and leave! Last time I’m telling you!” Y/N told him in a warning tone. Drake grabbed all of his stuff and left.

Y/N let out a big sigh as she ran her hands down her face. She couldn’t believe what just happened between her and Drake. Now she knows that everything Austin was telling her about Drake was true. Y/N couldn’t help but feel bad, but she also knows she has to make it right as well.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Y/N was driving home in her car. After what just happened with Drake she couldn’t wait to get home and see Austin. After firing Drake, she felt a weight that has been on her shoulders be lifted off.

Y/N parked her car right behind Austin’s vehicle that was parked in the driveway. She turned the car off and did a sigh of relief. She took off the seatbelt and grabbed her bag from the passenger seat. When she got out of her car, she locked the doors and put the strap of her bag around her shoulder. She closed the car door and walked through the door that led her inside and into the kitchen.

She noticed right away that the lights were dimmed and there were rose petals scattered all over the floor that was leading into the dinning room. Y/N took the strap of her bag off her shoulder and sat it down on the kitchen island counter. She followed the rose petals into the dinning room where Austin was. The table was all set for a romantic dinner. Austin had cooked her her favorite dish which made her heart feel all warm.

“Welcome home.” Austin said walking over to her. “What’s all this?” Y/N asked him in a curious tone. “Not that I’m complaining.” Y/N added in quickly which made Austin laugh. “I wanted to apologize for all of the fighting and accusing you of picking Drake over me. I shouldn’t be taking my jealousy out on you. To be honest I shouldn’t even be jealous.” Austin told her. “Actually, I should be the one apologizing.” Y/N said which made Austin look at her with confusion.

“Drake was talking a lot of shit about you, so I fired him.” Y/N told him which took Austin by surprise. “You fired him for me?” Austin said in surprise. “I don’t want an assistant that is rude and talks shit about the best boyfriend in the whole world.” Y/N told him as she wrapped her arms around his neck. She leaned in and connected her lips with his soft lips.

The kiss was full of love and and passion. Y/N felt her heart flutter in her chest when Austin put his hands on her hips. It’s been a while since Y/N and Austin have shared a kiss that was filled with so much passion. When they released from the kiss they stayed into each other’s embrace.

“I love you so much.” Y/N told him as she stared up into his memorizing green eyes. “I love you more.” Austin told her staring back into her gorgeous eyes.

They shared another sweet kiss and then sat down at the table together to eat the lovely meal Austin made for them.

[prettygoododds]

I misread the COC prompt savour as savior and when I tell you the notes I made for that prompt will no longer work…..it was my favorite too😭😭

[lifeonmvrs]

happy birthday to the best character ever,, baz pitch

[hellisntreal]

a power of peace and healing//your bones run strong

I spent a very long time trying to work out a Stone design and I'm still not settled! I'm sure like my other humanizations of Fallen London entities, I'll come up with a few <3

[you-remind-me-of-the-babe]

It’s fucking terrifying how deep the desire goes. How carelessly he’s letting me wade in unchecked.

I drag my fingers back up his thighs, hooking the hem of his shorts, pulling. The water’s up to my neck.

Stop me, I think. Pull me back.

More Than Friends by Fatalfangirl

Happiest Birthday to Stacy!

I commissioned this gorgeous piece of art from @mostlymaudlin as a birthday gift to @fatalfangirl! This is an illustration from a scene from Stacy’s fabulous fic More Than Friends. If you’re reading this fic, you know the scene. 😉 If you haven’t yet, do yourself a favor and start it now because it is a fucking TREAT.

Stacy, my dear friend. You are such a wonderful person whom I absolutely adore. I am thankful for your friendship every damn day. I love you and I hope this brings you some joy and happiness today. Thank you for being you. ❤️❤️❤️

[literary-heights]

Chapter 60 if it was good

[letraspal]

“One kiss and you think the world is upside down.”

[foreverdolly]

baby fever | daddy!austin x mommy!reader

yet another request from my "three days of blurbs" event. i'm expanding this event in a very exciting way. so be on the lookout for that announcement.

request: just more daddy austin pls ! and then another person requested the same thing saying: how are daddy!Austin and mommy!reader doing? how is the baby?

requested by: anon and @stephthestallion

word count: 1.3k

warnings/notes: a whole year later and austin is sitting across from the same interviewer who officially broke the big news about the birth of his first child. austin's ready to gush some more about his little family. basically tooth rotting fluff. austin is the best dad and husband. basically part two to 'baby bliss'.

“Here we are, Austin.” The interviewer shuffled her question cards around in her hands, smiling down at her lap for a few moments as she readied herself. “Last week marked an entire year since our last interview.” The woman looked a tad bit older. She wasn’t decked out in bright colors and tight fitting clothes like the last time around, rather she looked well put together and business casual. The years had changed her, and for the better it would seem. 

It was hilarious to look back on last year's interview. He remembered how much he had been dreading it. How he had doubted the interviewers integrity and her ability to carry herself professionally. This time around he felt relaxed in his folding chair, his ring clad fingers gripping onto the wooden armrests so that he could pull himself up a little higher so that he could straighten out his broad shoulders.  He didn’t need to look at his manager to know that she was smiling. Todays interview felt light and carefree, and for once Austin didn’t feel nervous in the least to answer questions about his life. 

“One whole year, huh? Time flies by when you’re having fun. . . or something along those lines.” He flashed a smile before laughing at his own awkwardness. 

It was odd to think about how far he had come since the Elvis movie. He’d been a part of so many projects since then. It really had been his big break, and he was thankful for that. The blessings in his life had been immeasurable after the film. To say that time flew by would be an understatement. 

Taking care of business in a flash. 

He smiled fondly down at his boots, clearing his throat as he readied himself for more questioning. He was prepared today for the more personal direction that this interview would be sure to lean towards. Austin could be a very private man, but he had gotten the go ahead from his wife to discuss the smaller details of their life. Gushing over his son just so happened to be his favorite pastime. 

“A ton has happened in this last year for you. Awards, new movies, cameos in television shows, partnerships- through all of these personal triumphs for austin, do you still feel even slightly influenced by Elvis? Or was that just a necessary phase in your life that’s come and gone?” 

Austin straightened out his jacket, as he leaned an elbow on the armrest, shifting his weight from one hip to the other. The director style chair was horrifically uncomfortable and dug into his thighs. 

“I’m not Elvis, but I dedicated almost three years of my life to becoming him. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to shake him and all of his mannerisms, if that’s what you're asking. He feels like less of a role that I played and more like a family member to me now. Like an older brother, or even a best friend. I’ve never truly loved someone that I’ve never met before, but that’s Elvis for me.” 

She nodded her head, shooting him a warm smile before switching to another card. 

“The interview that I did with you practically broke the internet. Still, to this day, it’s the video that has the most views on our channel.” 

Austin nervously chuckled, using his hand to gently pinch the soft skin of his bottom lip, shaking his head in disbelief. It was still crazy to think that he went from being a low paid actor who could only book romcom gigs to this. Gone were the days of playing the doting boyfriend in cheesy television shows. He still felt like he was dreaming when he was reminded of his influence. He mumbled a quick “that’s insane” before she continued. 

“You announced that your wife had her baby, so I was hoping that you’d fill us in a little. What’s going on in the Butler household? What’s new?” 

He had been prepared for the personal questions, as was his wife. 

“Y/N’s doing really great. She started up her own business about two months after Finn was born, and it’s just exploded for her. I’m incredibly proud of her. She was always into metal work, but seeing how her jewelry brand has taken off? I’m just in awe of her.” Austin could talk about his other half for hours. Y/n never ceased to amaze him. Everything she did just sparkled to him. He still had to pinch himself sometimes, just to make sure that he hadn’t dreamed her up. “Finn also just celebrated his first birthday, and that just absolutely blows my mind. I’d be lying if I said that the wife and I didn’t cry. He got so big and so fast. Too fast for my liking.” 

“Do you like being a dad? You used to be pretty inactive on your social media accounts, but you post about your family pretty consistently. From the outside looking in your life looks perfect. We’re all so happy for you.” 

“I love being a dad and I love being a husband. When you find the person that you want to spend your life with, it never feels like settling. I don’t miss the bachelor days at all.” Austin’s rings glimmered in the bright set lighting as he continued to talk with his hands. “If anything, I’m relieved that they’re over. It’s like I’m just now starting to live my life. These last few months have been incredibly busy, but with the holidays coming up I’m just happy to have a little break.” Thankfully he didn’t have any interviews or shoots booked for the two weeks leading up to Christmas. He was ready to give his little family his full and undivided attention. 

“Do you have some things planned for the holidays?” She asked, setting her cards down. It seemed like they were getting off topic, but the interviewer didn’t seem to mind. 

“Tons, actually. Y/n grew up with fake Christmas trees, so it’s become a Butler family tradition to go and get a real fur tree. Some of our family are going to be visiting, so our guest rooms will be occupied for the first time in a while. She’s been decorating the house nonstop. She’s always been crazy about celebrating, which I appreciate more than she knows. It’s special every year.”  

The interviewer asked a few more questions regarding his current projects, and he divulged all that he could. The small piece of paper was starting to feel heavy in his pocket, and he was beginning to get more and more nervous as the minutes ticked by. Him and his wife had been planning something special. 

One year later. 

Doing it this way felt right. 

“Well it was a pleasure, as always, to speak with you, Austin. Super quick, tell the people where they can find you and what you’re working on.” 

“I’m on instagram. I really only post about my projects and family, so I’m pretty boring. And,” He lifted up in the seat, shoving his hand into his back pocket so that he could pull out a piece of paper to flash at the camera- and his manager who stood behind it. “We’re currently working on baby number two.” 

He watched his manager’s jaw drop as she stared at the sonogram picture, quickly blinking away excited tears. There, in black and white, was a picture of their new baby. “R-Really?” She screamed out excitedly. 

“We’re having a valentines day baby. We wanted to keep it a surprise until now.” 

And after the cameras had been cut and he had been properly scolded by his suddenly emotional manager, Austin found himself eagerly hoping back into his car. 

And just like last year he sped home. Eager to get to his baby boy and his two bestest girls.

@knoxvillesshoes@cosmorant@ol1viam@simply-sams-things@haim80s@gabbcabb@8hgel@slutt4him@busy-bee-angel-misska@kaitaesupremacy@dazedshoon @4rt3m1ss@cryingabtab@kittenlittle24@austinsrealgf@austinbutlersgirlfriend@clearbolts @dark-as-love@anni-secret-account-75@ab4eva@starcatchxr @julietamidala @obbsessivereader@gwuide@blurredcolour@the-little-red-haired-girl@meladollsims@poppet05@shrekstheloml@randomwriter888@idc123sworld@vane28282@mirandastuckinthe80s@girlblogger2002@rockerchick05@screechingstrawberrysong@simpforevery1@girlabirla@dre6ming@obetrolncocktails@fairyjanes@jensenswinchester@lo-bells @in-my-body-bag@fxntxsix@petrparkrslut@eliseinmemphis @lelifesaver @screaching-cookie@fantuhsise@areuirish @bcofl0ve@mslizziesblog@shynovelist@ssstrangersblog @harrysthecraic@hangmanswhore@jyvnho@mymamalife @melodydior

[stephstars08]

Falling Apart

Austin!Elvis Presley x Reader

Warnings: Angst, Mention of Drugs being taken, Drugs, Mention of Drinking Alcohol, Divorce, Depressed Elvis, Yelling/Fighting, Elvis having a meltdown on stage, Colonel trying to manipulate Reader, Mention of Elvis collapsing, Fluff at the end, and Maybe some Grammar Errors. (Sorry if I forgot any!!!)

Summary: Due the Colonel making Elvis take a bunch of drugs to keep him energized to perform, it’s making Elvis completely fall apart. It get’s even worse when Pricilla packs all of her stuff up and leaves Elvis taking their daughter with her. After Elvis’s dad’s assistant Y/N hears the news she does everything she can to help Elvis pull himself back together.

Word Count: 2,162

Author’s Note: FINALLY MY FIRST ELVIS MOVIE STORY IS HERE! I’ve been waiting for basically a year to finally get a plot for a story for one of my favorite movies of all time! This isn’t just my first Austin/Elvis story but this is also my first story of the new year so I hope you all enjoy! If any of you want to you can read this as Elvis x Reader or Austin!Elvis x Reader! It’s up to you!!

Y/N Y/L/N is the assistant to Vernon Presley who is of course the father of the one and only Elvis Presley. Vernon is in charge of Presley Enterprises. Vernon hired Y/N to be his assistant when Elvis came home from the army. Due to all of the films Elvis was staring in at the time it was getting too hard for Vernon to take care of everything by himself so that’s why he hired Y/N.

When Y/N got the job, she wasn’t expecting to be around Elvis so much. Of course, Y/N isn’t complaining since Elvis has brought her in with open arms and so did his wife Priscilla. Elvis has thanked Y/N so much for helping his father out.

Y/N would be lying if she said that she has never had a crush on the heartthrob. When Elvis first started out Y/N immediately grew a crush on him, but that crush did fade away after she graduated from high school and when Elvis went overseas to be in the army. But as time went on that crush returned and the more, she was around Elvis, the more the crush grew. Y/N wished she didn’t feel that way about Elvis since he’s married to Priscilla, and she is really good friends with Priscilla as well. But those thoughts just flood her mind whenever she is with him.

Y/N loved everything about her job except having to work with the Colonel who is the manager of Elvis. Ever since the first day she met the Colonel she knew he wasn’t very fond of her. She hated being around him since she always feels uncomfortable around him, and she always gets bad vibes from him.

But Y/N didn’t see the Colonel’s dark side till Elvis started to play a residency in Las Vegas.

********************

Y/N was at her apartment getting ready to meet Vernon at a business meeting. Right before she walked out the door, she heard her phone ring. When she answered the phone, she heard Vernon’s voice.

“Hi, I was just about to walk out the door to meet you.” Y/N said into the phone. “Priscilla left Elvis this morning.” She heard Vernon tell her which made her heart drop. “Oh my gosh.” Y/N said in a shocked tone. Even though she’s shocked by the news she knew the reason why Priscilla left. “She moved all of her stuff out and she took Lisa with her.” She heard Vernon tell her. She could hear the sadness in his voice. “How is Elvis?” Y/N asked in the phone. That was the only question that was coming to her mind. “He’s a complete mess.” She heard him tell her which broke her heart.

“Can you go to Graceland and just stay there with him till I come back from the meeting?” Vernon asked her. “I just really don’t want him to be alone right now.” He added. “Of course, I can.” Y/N answered into the phone.

“Thank you so much dear.” She heard him say. “I’ll talk to you soon.” He added which made her smile a little. “You’re welcome. I’ll talk to you soon.” She told him through the phone. After they said their goodbyes Y/N hung up the phone.

********************

Y/N parked her car in front of the big Graceland mansion. She turned the car off and grabbed her purse from the passenger seat. She got out of the car closing the driver's seat door. As Y/N made her way to the front door she wrapped the strap of her purse around her shoulder.

When she got to the door, she rang the doorbell and waited but no one answered so she rang the doorbell again but still no answer. Y/N put her hand on the doorknob and twisted it which made the door open. Y/N walked inside the mansion. “Elvis!” Y/N called out as she closed the door. She looked around and noticed that things that belonged to Priscilla were gone. Y/N let out a sigh she she walked into the dining room and put her keys and purse down onto the table.

“Elvis!” Y/N called out again as she walked over to the bottom of the staircase and again, she got no response. She knew Elvis had to be home because where else would he go. Y/N walked up the staircase and right when she got to the top, she heard whimpering. Y/N walked down the hallway and stopped in front of the door to what was the bedroom Elvis once shared with Priscilla. That was where the whimpering was coming from. She was going to knock on the door, but something was telling her to just walk in.

When she opened the door, she saw a bunch of medicine bottles on the floor. Y/N walked in and at first, she didn’t see Elvis till she walked past the king-sized bed. Elvis was sitting on the floor crying into his knees that were hiding his face. It broke Y/N’s heart seeing Elvis in this kind of state. “Elvis.” Y/N said in a soft voice. Elvis looked up at her with his eyes filled with tears and his cheeks soaked with tears running down them. “What are you doing?” Elvis asked her. She could hear how broken he was in his voice. “Your father wanted me to be here with you till he comes back from his business meeting.” Y/N told him. Elvis didn’t say anything back. He just looked away from her.

Y/N sat down next to him. “I’m so sorry about what happened.” Y/N told him with sincere in her voice. “Why are you saying sorry to me?” Elvis asked still not looking at her. “What do you mean?” Y/N asked him. “I’m the reason why she left. She said I’m like a zombie.” Elvis told her as tears continued to stream down his face like a waterfall. “Those pills are what turn you like that.” Y/N told him which made him finally look back at her.

She can’t just keep jumping around it anymore. When he’s on those pills it’s like he’s a completely different person. Those pills are making him fall apart.

“The pills. They just keep controlling me. It’s like they have taken over me.” Elvis told her as he started to cry harder if that was even possible. “I know.” Y/N started. “That’s why I’m here. I’m going to help you get through this.” Y/N told him looking him straight into his eyes. Elvis believed her as he stared back into her eyes. “Okay.” Elvis said in a soft voice.

“I’m going to go downstairs into the kitchen to get you some water.” Y/N told him but before she could stand up, he grabbed her hand. “Please, don’t leave me. Please stay with me.” Elvis said to her in a pleading tone. “Okay! Okay, I’ll stay here with you.” Y/N told him in reassurance. Y/N wrapped her arm around him and rubbed her hand up and down his arm as he cried.

They stayed like that till Vernon came home.

********************

As a lot of time pasted Y/N kept her promise to Elvis. She’s been looking after him as much as she could. Even though Y/N has been doing her best to take care of Elvis, he’s still not the man he once was.

The only time Elvis looks happy is when he is on stage in front of his fans. The only people that knew what he was going through were the people he sees every day.

Elvis was playing another show in Vegas. Y/N watching him perform from the side of the stage with Jerry by her side. “You’ve been very quiet this evening.” Jerry said to her which earned him a glare from her. “You know damn well why I’ve been quiet.” Y/N told him in a stern tone. “The Colonel came before I could call you and right away, he made Dr. Nick shoot him up with drugs.” Jerry explained to her. “I’m not mad at you, okay!” Y/N told him with a heavy sigh. “He should be in a hospital bed but instead that monster decided to make the decision to shoot him up with the same drugs that is what made him collapse in the first place.” Y/N said with anger in her tone.

Jerry saw the tears forming in her eyes, so he brought her in for a hug. He knows about the feelings she has for Elvis, so he knows it’s hard seeing him like this. As Y/N returned the hug she tried her best to keep her tears in.

They released from the hug when they heard Elvis singing to Suspicious Minds with no music. Y/N could sense right away that something was wrong, and it was just going to get worse. As Elvis went on a rant about how this was going to be his last show in Vegas the Colonel immediately made his way up to the stage.

“Pull the curtain down!” Colonel told someone in a demanding tone which made Y/N and Jerry look at him. “What is going on here.” Colonel asked Jerry in a stern tone. Jerry took a glance at Elvis and then back at the Colonel. “I think he wants to know that, too.” Jerry told him.

When Elvis saw the Colonel started to act even more out of character. Elvis was having a melt down and it was starting to scare Y/N a little since she’s never seen him act like this. As the curtain started to fall Elvis started to yell at the Colonel. When Elvis said, “You’re Fired!” to the Colonel Y/N felt her heart rate speed up.

As the Colonel walked closer to him, he just kept saying “you’re fired” louder and louder each time. “YOU’RE FIRED!” Elvis screamed into his microphone which made everyone, and everything go silent. Everyone looked at Elvis with shock as the Colonel looked at him with sadness. “You’re fired.” Elvis said more calm and not into the microphone.

When he dropped his microphone, it made Y/N jump by the loud noise the mic made when it hit the stage. She watched him turn away from the Colonel and walk off the stage.

********************

Y/N decided to wait an hour before going up to Elvis’s room to check on him. Y/N was walking down the hallway to the elevator when she felt someone grab her left wrist. Y/N turned around to see that it was the Colonel who grabbed her wrist.

“Let me go.” Y/N told him in a demanding tone. “You go up there and tell him to take me back.” Colonel told her in the same tone she used. He knew she was going upstairs to talk to Elvis. Y/N let out a scoff as she pulled her wrist out of his grip. “You are the reason why he’s falling apart!” Y/N told him. “You’re the reason why he’s hooked on all of those drugs and you’re the reason why Pricilla and Lisa left him!” Y/N added as she looks at him with a fiery look in her eyes.

“Do it or you’re fired!” Colonel told her in a warning tone. “You’re not the boss of me and you never were.” Y/N said not back down to him. “You stay the hell away from him!” Y/N told him in a warning voice and walked away from him.

********************

When Y/N got to Elvis’s room before she could knock on the door it opened to reveal Elvis. “When I heard footsteps, I figured that it was you coming to check on me.” Elvis told her letting her inside. Y/N could tell that he was more calmed down then what he was just an hour ago. “I was going to come up here right away, but I decided to let you cool off.” Y/N told him while he closed the door.

“I’m sorry that you had to see me like that. I guess I just lost control.” Elvis told her turning around to face her but didn’t look at her. “Elvis, you have nothing to be sorry about.” Y/N told him. She put one of her hands onto one of his cheeks which made his eyes meet hers. “It was the drugs and that shot of alcohol didn’t help either but that’s what made you lose it.” Y/N reassured him.

“But what you did right was you set yourself free from that monster.” Y/N told him stroking his cheek lightly with her thumb. “I didn’t want him taking you away from me, too.” Elvis told her.

Before she could say anything, Elvis’s lips connected with hers. Y/N immediately returned the kiss. They continued to kiss until they had to pull away for air.

“I think I’m falling in love with you.” Elvis confessed to her. Y/N’s lips curved up into a smile. “Me too.” Y/N told him and leaned back up to reconnect her lips with his soft lips again.

[themyscirah]

Just remembered this cover existed : )