#basically twilight but not

[slutisnotabadword]

Twilight was THIS 🤏🏾 close to being a camp masterpiece. It had all of the elements. Vampires, werewolves, stupid teenagers. So let me tell you how I would fix Twilight:

1. Fixing how the Quilette people were included.

Here’s how you can EASILY fix this problem in many ways. One—make up a tribe instead of using real ones. Two—don’t do indigenous tribes at all and change your lore (think of how they did werewolf families in TVD). Three—still included the Quilette people but not change their history, as in have Jacob just get biten by a werewolf and but he just so happened to be Native.

2. Speaking of Jacob, have Jacob and Bella remain true bestfriends.

I love stupid triangles, they are my guilty pleasure. But Jacob and Bella would’ve been some messy ass bestfriends (the matching side eyes they had during BD2?? Yeah). They could’ve like kissed once and was like… nah. Cause honestly at the age, you probably had a crush on your bestfriend atleast once.

3. Make Angela a witch.

This is what this story needed, goddammit. We needed witches!!! And I think Angela would’ve been a great witch. I think a lot of the human friends were wasted characters anyway.

4. Speaking of!! Developed the humans WAAAAY more.

I think the humans should’ve found out about the supernatural world so they can be more involved. I don’t know, think about how TVD did it or something like that.

5. Vampire hunters.

Bella should’ve had a vampire Hunter arc goddammit. Imagine the tension between her and Edward. THAT is what we called cinema.

6. Jacob and Leah arc

Those two fine ass should’ve had a relationship arc. In the books those two had the best chemistry in the ENTIRE series. Had my ass WAITING for a kiss scene and I didn’t get shit. I’m still salty about it. I don’t know, Jacob and Leah just had it and just made sense.

7. Charlie should’ve been a vampire Hunter.

Like I said. Would’ve been more interesting. Him being sherriff would’ve tied onto that.

8. DIVERSITY.

Actually this should’ve been up higher. And yeah, we had “indigenous representation”, but their stories felt like an after thought and didn’t get much focus. There should’ve been way more diversity within the Cullens, especially since they are not even biologically related and came from different periods. And you know what, I would’ve loved to see a Black Bella. I SAID IT. Maybe because I’m projecting but I don’t give a damn. I think Bella gives mixed black girl vibes sometimes. Think Lisa Bonet in the 80s… YUP.

9. More teenage content

It was the early 2000s, peak stupid teenage fluff. Let’s go all the way. I wanted to see Bella get wasted at a college party and Edward hauls her away and makes her an anti-hangover smoothie in the morning, idk.

10. Speaking of Edward… making him more Ginger and more likeable.

Edward is a fucking insufferable little cunt. I hate that man, but there was definitely a way for me to like him. Should’ve made him more ginger, honestly. A CURLY ginger to be more exact. With freckles. I wished he was more like a free spirited but also kind of academia vibe. Like yeah he wears old vintage sweaters, but he also likes to read books while laying in trees. I don’t know, anything to give that man more of a likable personality. He’s the leading man for fucks sake, I should be dropping my panties at the thought of him, why am I pulling them up and proceeding to cover myself with a trench coat. Do better.

11. A different author.

That speaks for itself.

[themortaldraw]

keep forgetting to post this one

[talesfromthecrypts]

I get so frustrated by "yeah make vampires scary again" stuff every time a vampire movie has a "monster" vampire (Nosferatu, Voyage of the Demeter, etc). It reeks of an attitude that thinks all horror is about something being ugly and horrifying on the outside. If you can't see the horror in Interview With the Vampire, or a Jean Rollin film, or The Hunger, or Carmilla, or the vampire sections of Baldur's Gate because they are attractive that is absolutely an issue on your end. There is such a rich well of themes to dig into with horror and vampires, especially where sex and romance are concerned, but people are so desperate to separate romance and horror. The despair of being frozen as a child even while your mind matures, the loneliness of an eternity alone, the terror of eternal hunger that can't be sated, the awful seduction by something beautiful but monstrous. Trying to turn vampires into just any other monster doesn't make them more horrifying, its just a more kind of overt horror that can only be done so many times and is often covered better by other monsters.

[maple-bea]

HIIIII can I make another request 👁️👁️ Sky, Twilight, and Warriors hanging out together? Best friends :D

wars tries out woodcutting!!! twilight is the model lmao

[artificial-angels]

wanted to draw the ponies in my style 💥

[soleminisanction]

It turns out the best-ever image of a Super carrying a Bat was published in 1975.

[cosmetichorror]

Lu au where everyone is the age of their game

Wild is 7

Warriors is 10

Sky is 13

Twilight is 18

Four is 20

Wind is 22

Time is 26

Legend is 33

Hyrule is 37

Warriors and Wild are LITERALLY child soldiers, Sky is in middle school (and is more than happy to travel as it means he has less homework to do…)

Twilight is a fresh adult and doesn’t know what he’s doing with his life

Four is still as short as he is in the comic. Also much to Sky’s dismay Four basically becomes his teacher so he doesn’t fall behind in his studies.

Wind finally can legally drink…. He’s the wine aunt. He’s a nut case. The kids love him. He and Time were babysitting Warriors during the WAR and they’re both still mad they put a like, 9 year old into a war.

Time is freshly married…. He’s as bad (if not worse) then Sky ever could be when it comes to being lovey dovey.

Legend is mad he has to go on another adventure after he’s been comfortably retired for a decade. He becomes the new old man, despite Rulie being older…. And btw Hyrule is still his little brother.

Hyrule is aging wonderfully much to everyone’s surprise. He looks 25. He still can’t read btw but he has mastered life in the wilderness. He is like a mountain lion, he can hide behind anything and sneak anywhere now. Give him a leaf and he’ll find a way to hide behind it and you’ll never see him….

They would’ve never found Hyrule if they didn’t have Warriors and Wild with them, and even then them finding Hyrule was more so Hyrule allowing them to find him so he could check on the kids.

[mmelete]

Random Lu Headcanons

Four has an unhealthy amount of socks. Fuzzy socks, themed socks, etc.

Wild bakes a lot when he’s stressed.

Twilight is actually really funny but not intentionally. He’ll add a random comment into a conversation with his thick country twang with plenty of sass and it’s HILARIOUS.

On the other hand, Sky will say the most UNHINGED thing you’ve ever heard of in the cheeriest, friendliest voice. “Did you know that swans mate for life and when their loved one dies, they usually die of grief? How tragic! ☺️☺️”

Time is a picky eater. He also might have a slight obsession with milk-based desserts (tres leches perhaps?)

Legend and Wild hum a lot when they’re relaxed/doing tedious activities like cooking or chores.

Hyrule can jump the highest (without magic abilities)

Warriors shaves even though he can’t grow a real beard to save his life. Legend makes fun of him for it even tho he can’t grow a beard either.

[bigfatbreak]

Other than Spike, Pinkie Pie is the first person Twilight is comfortable laughing around - Pinkie makes it her personal goal to widen that pool.

[pixiatn]

Ngl, if Hollywood actually gave a shit, they would just fucking buckle up and make a Rise of the Brave Tangled Dragons movie

[personinthepalace]

Hiroki Suzuki as Loid Forger in SPY x FAMILY Musical (2023)

[mercurymoths]

Continuing to cartoon saloon- ify Zelda! This time with twilight princess, because Link is literally a wolfwalker, it just fits too well!

(Also I guess this is a series now! Check out my blog for my other cartoon saloon x Zelda stuff! )

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[t-5secondsart]

now that the "what sage would the lu boys be" polls are over, i thought it would be fun to draw the chain as the ancient sages from totk!

[haedoll]

im back losing my mind about her but i will NEVER shut up about how much respect and trust tp zelda has for link who is essentially just some guy she just met (as a wolf at that) and how she always makes it a point to kneel to be at his level while he’s in wolf form and then bowing to him at the end like. ugh my girl

[taxonomicons]

my friends introduced me to @punkitt-is-here and I was overcome with the divine urge to draw funny horse comic

[technikki]

my dearest friends the three shadows[relation withheld]