#basically I'm just writing a literal crap ton

[coolkat223]

I'm probably gonna be gone for a while soon so I'm gonna just put down all of my idea's (Doesn't have to be a story, Could be what you may think would happen if this WAS inside the SAGAU-verse for simplicity because there is a lot of concepts I have and some of them may take long to write so I don't want to have too much on your hands at the moment) So my first idea: Content creator Reader, (Twitch because its easier) Where they have chat constantly in their mind and can be accessed by other people like Nahida going through their brain and chat can see this too (as a sort of second monitor) [Not In Imposter] And Writer Reader. Basically this can go two ways, One is where reader was creating the concept of man first before actually making Teyvat or made Teyvat first then humans, Or simply made Teyvat itself and when humans appear reader is all like: "Oh my god! Is my drawing okay?! Did a spill happened when I wasn't looking? (is my baby okay???)" Can appear as a hand with a pen(cil) which is their main form and they can draw in anything and can even draw themselves an avatar to make them seem less threatening or less confusing for humans.

Reader that is a student tells everyone that tells Al-haitham that they got detention (or suspension) for defending themselves at school (probably the most realistic and normal idea you will read in SAGAU) A reader that can sort of swap between persona's of archons. an example of this is if they take the persona of Venti they get speed similar to him but not quite. Same for Zhongli with his shield, Raiden with chests- i mean uhhh Thunder sword Ig (Idk what am I supposed to say here???) Nahida = Check their (mind) browser history. Furina = Flexibility (because water) [Literally the only one with Imposter Au potential because of accidental survival] Brain-rot reader accidentally saying THE WORST possible sentence you could say in Genshin (especially in a place where the language there is over 9000) And lastly a reader with a crap-ton long playlist and they just accidentally stumble across it Once again I recommend that you do not make a story because A: that would take too long, B: Because I have to go to a trip really long and I need something to read on my phone when I'm over there. C: Because if i did this separately then it would be like a discord conversation at night and nobody would have a chance to even send mail if its filled to the point its like an overflowing cup.

It's okay. have fun on your trip. Also I have to think really hard for them because some ideas are easy to figure out while the other ones are hard to go around.

ContentCreator!reader: This one will be complicated for the reader. It is like Nahida but the reader can't deactivate (in the near future the reader can deactivate them but sometimes forget that because they got use of the chat in their head.) and will have to pretend that the chat either likes their connection to their family and friends in their homeworld or like they are also different creators from another universe and that's how all creators communicate.

Writer!reader: l like both of them so I merged them together. To the characters they sometimes see them as a hand holding a (pen)cil or in their human form which are mostly black and white and their hair is multicolor like a mood ring. When the characters do something that they have no business doing makes them frantic and worried about them like a mother, even goes to give them cute nicknames to them (ex: little maple leaf- Kazuha, precious snowboy- Chongyun.). The characters will be embarrassed but sometimes they get into trouble on purpose so the reader will be dotted to them. (It's pretty much a contest of 'who got the most affection from the reader.')

Student!reader: I'm guessing that the reader is very smart like Al-Haitham and is very proud of being smart. That they have a fight with their own teacher for who is right or wrong (in most cases the reader is right and the teacher has their pride broken they expel you out of spite.). At the end of Al-Haitham pats the reader on the head and tells that he is proud of you and even teaches you other methods.

SwapPersona!reader: Definitely for the imposter au. The reader will have the powers of all the Archons and to tell that they use a certain one at the end of their hair will glow (ex: Teal- Venti or Green- Nahida) and also use their signature moves. Once the other saw that the reader did it they will realize that they are the real creator while the one in the throne is the real imposter.

Brain-rot!reader: My guess is that the characters will be worried because to them the reader is very calm and mellow. To get them started saying some worst words the characters will help them calm down. (The yandere route is just the characters just kill the person that makes the reader angry.)

The reader's playlist: This one I feel that the reader will have a song that is dedicated to certain characters. Like Immortals by Fall Out Boy for Zhongli, Elastic Heart by Sia for Childe, and Thunder by Imagine Dragons for Razor. While the characters hear the reader singing the song they dedicate to them their vision will glow. The characters will feel proud of themselves and on rare occasions they were even singing the song to themselves.

1, 3, and 5 are hard to figure out the longest. I have already done 2, 4, and 6 instantly and I really enjoyed doing them especially for 2 and 6 being my favorite to do.

[pyromegalomaniac]

OI YOU

I HAVE AN IDEA

Puppet (or maybe actual) cryptid reader x Wally

I have so many ideas how to turn scary to spoopy

MOTHMAN - Fluffy little fellow that is extremely socially awkward

SIREN HEAD - little rockstar with another mouth on their neck. Horrible eyesight, and probably has a spare speaker everywhere hidden

SKINWALKER - just a silly shapeshifter who steals food and plays silly pranks

LOCHNESS MONSTER - professional mer-person, carry’s around spray bottle to sprits people who curse scales and SMOOOOTH. Skin

BIG FOOT - hiker, and buff as heck, socially anxious but always whispers out a ‘Language’ adnormally tall

EL CHUPACABRA - actually has a pet goat named baby. Fluffy!!

them is just off the top of my head. Their just silly little guys with silly inhuman features

Hey again, 112!! Glad to see you like my stuff enough to come back!! This sure is a lot of ideas!! I don't think I'll be able to quite capture your vision... but I can try!! I'll do my best!! I don't know a bunch about all these cryptids, but I know a crap ton about mothman, funny enough, since I listened to a podcast episode about him. Enjoy!!

(♡˙︶˙♡)

Wally x puppet cryptid!reader Headcanons🍎👻

Mothman-

Burying your face in your neck fluff

Your fluffy little antennas perk up or droop depending on your mood

Seeing Wally always makes them perk up

Wally loves petting your fur

You have really bad luck, accidents always seem to happen around you

That's okay Wally loves you

You give people nightmares when you're in a bad mood, so you try to stay near Wally since he makes you happy

Siren Head-

Generally loud as balls

Bumping into crap since you can barely see

Sometimes you pick up frequencies from radios

Wally loves to sing and dance with you

You're used a lot in Sally's plays for music and sounds

Lochness Monster-

Scottish Accent maybe

Lifeguard at the local pool

"Don't forget to bring a towel!"

(I'm sorry I couldn't help myself-)

Moves really smoothly

Wally likes watching you swim

He will NOT get in though

He doesn't know why you'd wanna get wet

Bigfoot-

Doesn't like pictures

Getting your portrait painted is fine though

Picnicking in the woods w/Wally

Healthy snacks like granola bars and stuff

So tall you can pick the tallest apples off trees

Strong and tall enough you can pick him up so he can pick the high apples too

Chupacabra-

You eat so much

Everyone likes your pet goat Baby

Wally has basically adopted it as his child

You are a very happy family

You will literally steal pies off windowsills

That one friend who always has food in their bag

Not to share necessarily

But you will sit down with Wally and eat a bunch of food

Wowsers, that's a lot!! Hope you liked these, 112!! Thanks for requesting them!! I had fun writing them, and I look forward to doing more in the future!! Much love!!

ヽ(>∀<☆)ノ

[kitkatopinions]

People really out there acting like the lackluster queer rep isn't tied to the fact that RT is a bigoted piece of shit company huh. Fucking wild lol.

Also really funny how they ignored the fact that you've talked about and reblogged posts about that RT being a bigoted, abusive piece of shit company. What, are you not allowed to talk about one of the multiple ways RT sucks when she's already covered all of the other crap they've done several times over? Do you need a disclaimer on every post that goes over all of RT's crimes?

Actually maybe we're onto something! Maybe you could add a long list of RT's crimes to every post so no one who reads them can escape from being reminded that RT is a vile, morally-bankrupt company that only cares about taking your money. :D Just really rub in that guilt for anyone who's even remotely defending anything RT does!

People will do whatever they can to pretend that 'RT' and 'CRWBY' have absolutely no overlap and that 'RT' and 'RT Higher Ups' has nothing to do with 'RWBY.' Why? Because they personally can't justify supporting RT in any way, they can't justify watching RT made stuff without being critical of it, and they can't justify enjoying something made by and influenced by RT. So they have to pretend that RWBY somewhere is entirely separate and entirely pure and entirely above criticism and that CRWBY is entirely wholly 'Not a part of RT' and that RWBY being on Crunchyroll is proof that watching RWBY doesn't help RT or bad business practices in any way. (btw I personally don't believe that watching or liking RWBY is bad, it's not the exact same thing as Harry Potter, I think talking about and liking RWBY is perfectly fine just so long as you acknowledge that it isn't perfect and are willing to critically analyze it as part of Rooster Teeth.)

And it's really funny because every time I'm like "what about the existence of Miles Luna" every so called progressive anti-rwde RWBY loving fan suddenly just be like

Somehow, me calling out Miles Luna or pointing out how he was the head of animation at Rooster Teeth - aka, a RT Higher Up - for literal years, is something that they just never happen to see, so they can go on pretending that RWBY and RT don't overlap at all.

These people will say I'm being biphobic for pointing out the difference between coding and confirmation despite being a bisexual woman with tons of queer ships who writes queer fanfictions where I make ninety percent of my favorite characters including Blake and Yang openly and unapologetically bisexual and despite the fact that I'm actually actively pushing for more and better queer confirmation... And then when I say "hey by the way remember how Miles Luna told a 'funny' story about how his drunk girlfriend was making out with a friend and he and other guys stood around oogling it because it was just so hot that it made them super turned on and then went on to say that he wasn't threatened by it like he would be if they were men because women didn't have what he had?' They just shut their eyes and put their hands over their ears going "la la la la la" and never once condemn that or even acknowledge it and then will turn around and post on their own blog about how rwde posters are bullying poor helpless progressive Miles Luna for being brave enough to have two women hold hands and look at each other long enough to make fans feel like they might kiss next season.

These people will say that rwde posters are secretly misogynists for saying we want Jaune to be less involved in the show and then when I'm like "hey, do you guys remember when Miles made tweets calling Tifa Lockhart a prostitute for wearing clothes he said were 'somethin' else' and do you remember when he made a youtube video called 'video games for your girlfriends' where he basically said women were too dumb to play hard video games but if you tricked her into thinking she was doing okay at a simple one, maybe she'd jerk you off? And do you remember when people posted pictures of him happily lounging with a body pillow of a then sixteen year old Ruby with the caption 'careful miles, she's still only sixteen' and I think he liked the tweet instead of being like 'what the fuck?' And also I don't know much about it but he apparently made a podccast called 'Fan Service' with Gray Haddock and that doesn't sound super feminist" And they once again just ignore me completely and pretend they didn't see that part of my post and then turn around and be like "well my latest interaction with RWDE has proven that they DOUBLY hate women because they HATE the guy who made the pixels that are named Ruby Rose look like a woman!"

These people will tell me that I don't care enough about RT's controversies and bigotry despite the fact that I've talked about it over and over and reblogged other blogs talking about it over and over (including a post where I told people to be careful to not harass random voice actors and animators demanding answers because the problem was clearly people who were higher up) because I don't post about it all the time without ever mentioning RWBY again (wonder why they want that -_-) but then when I'm like "Hey guys, remember the fact that Miles Luna the person who helped create RWBY and has been like one of the lead writers since RWBY's creation was also a literal Rooster Teeth higher up who was head of animation for years AKA a Rooster Teeth Higher Up," they again just fucking ignore that. And then turn around and post about how RWDE posters don't care enough about animators somehow and how we're being mean to the poor defenseless indefinable 'crwby.'

Anti-rwdes do not give a shit about misogyny, they do not give a shit about queer representation, they do not give a shit about the endless controversies of RT, they do not give a shit about examining the content made by horrible people, they do not give a shit about making sure bigots don't get platformed, they do not give a shit about even acknowledging things that are problematic. They only want the media they like to be considered above criticism so that they can watch it without feeling any bad feelings.

[lily-of-the-flame]

If yes wins, I'll make Prisma public! Otherwise, if you want to tead it any time soon, you'll have two options: give an absolute ton of feedback on Crack of Dawn, or pay me 50 dollars. Or write it yourself.

I'm currently still working on chapter one, but I have a plan!

Summary of Prisma chapter one: Jade did something stupid and was arrested. Shortly before her execution, god broke her out of prison. Then she robbed him.

Summary of Prisma chapter two: God has to leave but forgets to give Jade directions so she hamstrings a giant with the knives she stole from god. She then asks the giant for directions.

Summary of Prisma chapter three: Avien appears! He's gay! Jade is a lesbian!

This is my notes. This is literally my entire plan. Chapter three will probably annoy a lot of lesbians but Jade doesn't give a crap. (Basically she's just going to immediately know she's lesbian as soon as she knows it's an option and then just never even enter the closet.)

[deadcactuswalking]

Top 20 Best Hit Songs of 2023

If I were doing this how I did it in the past, I would be looking at the Billboard Year-End Hot 100 and giving you my 10 favourite songs, as always, but I’m not doing that for several reasons: the Hot 100 is less representative of anything ever than it’s ever been, and my #1 hit song of the year in the US  is “Ella Baila Sola” by Eslabon Armado and Peso Pluma. There are songs that charted in the top 40 I like more but in terms of prolonged hits expected to solidly make the year-end list, it’s not even close. There is so much unbridled joy in that one song it is almost unimaginable that I’d consider any other hit song from this year above it. It would be silly to find another nine songs that even try to compare. Genuinely. So let’s do it this way: I’ve started writing  in mid-October because here in the UK we basically will just have a month of nothing and then Christmas for the rest of the year. My criteria for this is the song has to have peaked in the top 40 of the UK Singles Chart sometime this year before I write this list, specifically around the episode dated 14th October I’ll stop counting entries for this list. I’ll consider songs that end up peaking later this year for next year’s list, I think, and that may be arbitrary but I'm literally playing to Billboard's rules for their year-end this year, because why not be as ridiculous as they allow themselves to be? Why did I choose the UK? Well, it’s what I cover every week on this blog and don’t tell the Americans but their charts are so much less interesting when it comes the diversity and sheer quality of songs on display, a disparity I noticed especially this year. Otherwise, it’s as simple as that - did it make the top 40? Did I like it a lot? It’s on the list. Did I miss some stuff? Probably. Who cares? It’s my list. I’m deadcactuswalking, and these are the best hit songs of the year.

LIFE GOES ON: The Top 20 Best Hit Songs of 2023

Npw, how will this work? Well, I have 20 songs I want to talk about in some decent-length capacity, but I don’t want this to be overlong and I have a crap ton of honourable mentions and just things to get out of the way. I have reviewed every single one of these songs at length during my weekly REVIEWING THE CHARTS series and I want this to act as a more concise representation of the popular music I loved this year. This will not be nearly as in-depth as my 2006 list from this Summer or my previous hit songs lists, mostly because well, this is more of a round-up or compilation compared to those lists, which tended to have opinions I hadn’t shared so boldly prior to the list’s publication.

Also, some ground rules: the song has to have been released in late 2021 at the minimum, or at least be defined more by its status as a hit in 2023 than by its status as an older song in one’s catalogue that happened to resurge in the year of old songs re-emerging. This means that songs too indebted to previous years are not counted for this list, even if they hit the UK Top 40 this year. This means that despite them being great songs that had a solid chance at the list, I will not be including “What’s Love Got to Do with It” by Tina Turner, “STAY” by The Kid LAROI and Justin Bieber (which I talked about at length in my 2021 year-end list), Luke Combs’ cover of “Fast Car” - if this were a Hot 100 list, I’d be more lenient with this one - Taylor Swift’s re-recording of “Enchanted” or, most crucially, “See You Again” by Tyler, the Creator featuring Kali Uchis which would have probably topped the list if it weren’t from 2017. You could argue it was only a hit this year but let’s be completely honest with ourselves, it’s not representative of any other 2023 trend than “old songs becoming big”. It’s not sincere to consider it a “hit song of 2023”, at least in my opinion, but I understand why people would vary on that. Now that’s out of the way, I mean, we may as well get started - there are a ton of honourable mentions so I’ll try and spread them out vaguely evenly but I may just disperse them at random. You’re not my mother, you can’t tell me what to do. Again, it’s my list - and I am very aware how… concerning some of these choices may be. This first one, though, should be pretty uncontroversial.

#20

I mean, obviously, right?

#20 - “Escapism.” - RAYE featuring 070 Shake (Peak: #1)

I almost considered not including this just to be a contrarian, because I imagine this will pop up on damn near every year-end hit songs list you see, but that would be denying this excellent song its rightful spot here. Everything has been said about it but deservedly so. It was an incredible moment for a newly independent RAYE, and a narrative triumph as well as being a really maximalist hit in a time where you wouldn’t really expect this outside of critical-darling circles. From the siren motif to the dark, embedded trip-hop drums, the song finds that perfect reach between organic release and immaculate composition, to the point where it’s almost too perfect. There are so many tiny hooks and they all originate in a deeply-ridden trauma that envelops the song but never halts its momentum. Hell, that may be its appeal - it keeps on chugging, with that infectious piano line, incredibly wordy pre-choruses and borderline rap verses, a sprinkling of synth detail. Even that main break of the chorus feels like it’s building up to a goal never found, muddied in 070 Shake’s pained yelps surrounding an otherwise completely numbed-out, almost demo vocal delivery. That isn’t a moment of relief or realisation, and neither is the storm that succeeds it. She doesn’t want to feel like she did that night, but she will, and she knows it, whether it’s because of her lack of agency or the cruel decadent catharsis that leads to it. It’s a cyclical party of sorrow, and one intricately composed and presented. Why isn’t it higher if it’s so perfect? I don’t know, I think I just take solace in the scuffed. This next one is also a song I think may just be too perfect as a narrative experience to be higher.

#19

Afrobeats hits are generally very good, but few go far and beyond like this one did for me, and it got all the success it deserved.

#19 - “People” - Libianca (Peak: #2)

Cameroonian singer Libianca broke out with something so subdued you’d be pretty surprised to think of it as what it was: a global smash breakout sleeper hit. There’s a cozy intimacy to found in the distance of this song, a track that seems to want to push you off as much as it wants to vent to you, out of a desperacy where the mental health issues are disguised for the sake of just fitting into the world of people: nameless and endless faces, where even the closest to you are too pre-occupied to notice those small details like how much alcohol their friend’s been drinking for the past five days. In a year where we increasingly feel completely separated from our fellow human, I think this hit pretty hard for a lot of people. It’s also an oddly celebratory song in some ways - you could see the backing vocals as a ghostly choir haunting Libianca, who tampers with the idea of her own grave through these looming thoughts, or you could see them as those “people”, who don’t really know you, still being there and existing in a way where their presence may just be enough to keep you going. On a more purely sonic level, it’s a smooth as Hell track with a compelling emotive performance and one of the catchiest yet most depressive hooks of the year, one that ends without much satisfying resolve, probably much like the narrative on display. I don’t know if we’ll hear much more from Libianca on the singles chart, at least in Britain, but this was for sure a fantastic first impression. Now to talk about the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard.

#18

Can I legally do this? Like am I really allowed to put this over “Escapism.” or does this count as disturbing the peace?

#18 - “Oh Baby” - Nathan Dawe and Bru-C featuring bshp and Issey Cross (Peak: #35)

How this wasn’t like the biggest song ever is completely unknown to me. This has so many dumb hooks it’s ridiculous, it’s almost overwhelming. Maybe we were a tad too self-serious this year for this to get to the top 10? Regardless, it was still a hit, and one that just seems to take as many chances to be catchy as possible, which is what a… “star”-studded 2-step track needs to be. I knew I liked this from the moment I heard that stupid intro ad-lib “and it’s Bru-C” just because I knew I was in for a chaotic level of fun, but as I kept replaying this, finding more hooks in Bru-C’s simplistic bars that would absolutely rock a club even if they don’t sound impressive in recorded format, and finding more intricacies in the usually lazy Nathan Dawe’s production, with that futuristic bass, robotic “oh, baby” sample that gets manipulated in so many different ways, him having too much fun with his sound effects board and some of the tightest and honestly best drum programming I’ve heard in any song this year, hit or not. Issey Cross and bshp have a childish charm in their incessant chorus and especially that bizarrely transcendent bridge, and Bru-C just never shuts his mouth, which is absolutely what this song needed: the most annoying person at the function.

Honourable Mentions

What I’m going to do with these Honourable Mentions is I’ll split them four ways between genren - hip-hop, pop and R&B, EDM and everything else - and we’ll start with hip-hop. This was not a great year for rap in the mainstream, but the UK felt this much less than the US and there were still some highlights, such as:

“Sprinter” and “Trojan Horse” - Dave and Central Cee

These guys had more fun in that four-song EP than most dance hits had this year.

“PARK CHINOIS” - K-Trap and Headie One

One thing that got lost sometime before this year about UK drill was that it could be genuinely menacing, and I was glad to see a subtle version of that return here.

“It’s Crazy” - J Hus

This is the less subtle version. J Hus plays maniac serial killer surprisingly well.

“Martin’s Sofa” - Headie One

Headie One is generally a step above the rest but this was one of drill’s shining moments this year. There is actually only one British rap song in this top 20 proper, which kind of surprised me, but that’s not to downplay the annual achievements of the genre.

“On the Radar Freestyle” - Drake and Central Cee

Like its first Hot 100 hit! Okay, it’s because of Drake but hey, Drake wasn’t bad this year.

“First Person Shooter” - Drake featuring J. Cole

Cole was better but I promise, Drake still wasn’t bad this year. And that’s actually all of the hip-hop Honourable Mentions we have. Yeah, it really wasn’t this genre’s year. Oh, crap, I forgot about this one:

“Barbie World” - Nicki Minaj, Ice Spice and Aqua

I am pretty sure this is the worst song of all time. I love it. Back to the list.

#17

Listen, Minecraft YouTubers: let’s let bygones be bygones.

#17 - “Call Me What You Like” - Lovejoy (Peak: #32)

Wilbur Soot and co tend to work best when nothing is left unturned, all awkward and insecure details being revealed with little care for how the song actually functions outside of a killer chorus. Much of their EP consisted of these wonky but ultimately heavy anthems tapping into a modern British anxiety, wherein every misplaced drum fill, bizarre lyrical idea, it was all kind of a front for some of the catchiest riffs and most cathartic hooks in emo since the 2000s. There are several elements of this song I think I just hate, mostly from Wilbur himself, but he delivers it with as much uncertainty and loathing as I have towards him - it’s a pitiful song wherein neither a gruff yell or falsetto can outshadow a rolicking chorus’ raw energy. His dumbass newscaster voice as he details how much he hates this joyless relationship just furthers the frustration I have with this guy for being as pathetic as he is. Oh, and it does the classic pop punk final-chorus-drops-into-half-time trick which works absolutely every time. “I’m not paranoid, I’m a realist” is a line that made me hate to relate as much as I do to a Goddamn Minecraft YouTuber indie rock song but hey, we all need our angst outlet from somewhere. And for a good amount of the year, I took some solace in this one. The next entry is D-Block Europe.

#16

Man, I… I don’t know anymore.

#16 - “Pakistan” - D-Block Europe and Clavish (Peak: #8)

This is sheer gut instinct placement. If I didn’t have some form of restraint and respect for pop music as an artform, this would be even higher. This is probably the most straight-man pick I have here, I know, but I don’t really care, this is just too fun. It starts with a sample of “CrazyRussianHacker” testing a Desert Eagle on a TV, and the rest of the song indulges in just as much careless male chauvinism with a casual lack of respect, that isn’t even to the point of disrespect because they just don’t care enough. Both members of DBE actually bring their best here: Adz is the hook singer, punctuating his infectious, basic melodies with his typical ad-libs - the “ski!” one always gets me - whilst Dirtbike LB is… surprisingly coherent, switching flows in a typical off-beat fashion that actually ends up pretty compelling over an effortless trap skitter from Da Beatfreakz. And Clavish is here. I don’t know, man, I’ll gladly post a notes app apology for this decision if requested.

#15

Whilst we’re in pop-trap, here’s an example of the genre working in the complete opposite way.

#15 - “Mourning” - Post Malone (Peak: #35)

I think I did this song a lot of justice in my initial review. Now that’s not a cop-out, I’m still going to talk about it here, but it should speak wonders that this song immediately hit me considering that most of Post Malone’s output in his past two albums just hasn’t at all. Even the songs I do like were growers and not in a sense where I respected them a lot initially, moreso that they wore me down - Hell, a lot of his worst ever material has also been put out in this time and they didn’t immediately hit me as terrible until they also wore me down. Wearing down seems to the default mode of Post Malone nowadays and it’s reflected in both his best and worst songs, with this being a refreshing example of his exhaustion, starting with a refusal to acknowledge his flaws over this gorgeous liquidy blend of acoustics and twinkling pads that eventually sink behind the plundering bass and kick drums. Post doesn’t sound devastated, just lifeless, but still selling the content with his devoted warble he can never really get out of, pushing himself back into this isolating rut. Naturally, it’s Post, so the melancholy is found in the midst of meaningless flexing, but it just hits home how little any of this ultimately matters. I remember the first time I heard that drop in the second verse I was genuinely taken quite aback, and those little details in the final chorus with Post’s strained backing vocals and the rushing acoustics playing off the kick accentuate the utter frustration at play so brilliantly

#14

This one is a very recent addition to the list, as it just became a hit in the past few weeks! It’s already up there with some of the best dance hits of the year, AND it’s buy a guy with a funny name. What’s not to like?

#14 - “DNA (Loving You)” - Billy Gillies featuring Hannah Boleyn (Peak: #12 so far)

This one should be achingly simple to understand its appeal, but there are more layers than even I expected, really. That cheap synth pattern is surrounded by haunting ambiance that really recontextualise the cutesy lyrics regarding never questioning that loving this person is in Hannah Boleyn’s DNA. She’s not fully selling the lyrics either, it’s a filtered, not-many-risks-taken performance pushed to the front of the mix over a hammering four-on-the-floor bounce. Yet it’s not really a bounce, more of just a standing and jumping in place in a weird level of weary acceptance. It all builds up with the layered clttering percussion to a jerky synth line and the acoustic guitar that seems to clash a tad, bringing it back to the ATB chill-out nostalgia wave in a similar way to Peggy Gou’s hit this year, but with less certainty, bringing a new edge to that sound that you perhaps wouldn’t expect to hear 20 years past it fading out into the background. What really convinced me is that outro, where Boleyn is stripped of any surrounding rhythm, with both the refrain and a new, slightly off-beat verse laid bare onto the cascading synths. That verse in particular is just a brilliant touch to add more depth to the song without extending it unnecessarily, it feels like a moment of difference you want to capture and pick upon but the fact it’s never expanded on just leaves me wanting to replay the track more and find more of that hiding within it. There really isn’t a grander scope or message with this one, it’s just a greatly-orchestrated EDM track put together in a way that allows for a unique sound and doesn’t really want you to do much more with it than that, which is a kind of simplicity I can respect, especially if the product is so catchy and replayable. Now for what I probably played a bit less…

Honourable Mentions

Whilst we’re on dance, we may as well run through the EDM songs that missed the list proper, because there was actually a lot of good EDM - maybe not a lot of GREAT EDM, but it was a more unique and interesting scene in the UK particularly this year and last.

“Rush” - Troye Sivan

I’m counting this as EDM because 1.) it’s fascinating how his producers so effortlessly pulled off that “making an original hook sound like it was always a sample” trick and 2.) screw you, it’s my list, and this is a funky house song. I also am the singular authority on genres, by the way, so whilst we’re here, Kenny G is a rapper.

“AMERICA HAS A PROBLEM” - Beyoncé

It really is a shame that most of the weirder house cuts from RENAISSANCE didn’t get pushed but this is absolutely a good example of what could have been.

“Miracle” - Calvin Harris and Ellie Goulding

This song has such a perfect formula that I’m convinced “Desire” is the second in a trilogy where he records the same exact song with a female, non-binary and male vocalist. I’m expecting “Heaven” with Miguel anytime soon.

“(It Goes Like) Nanana” - Peggy Gou

One of the out-of-nowhere hits that actually had a lot of longevity this year, I’m delighted this slice of refreshing 90s chill-out worship is as adored as it is.

“Rumble” - Skrillex, Fred again.. and Flowdan

This is basically two different very distinct song ideas confined to two and a half minutes of shuttering grime: I do not know how Skrillex pulls it off so well.

“Disconnect” - Becky Hill and Chase & Status

This was incredibly close to making the list. Chase & Status may not have a winner with everything they put out but this year they single (double?) handedly made me have any faith in Becky Hill as an artist.

“Rave Out” - Turno, Skepsis and Charlotte Plank

The only reason this is not on the list proper is because there is a song about to enter the top 40 soon that does a similar thing in a way that I much prefer, and would probably be a lock for next year’s list. Sorry, you three, this is otherwise stellar. And now, once again, back to your regularly scheduled programming.

#13

…And when the day bleeds into nightfall…

#13 - “How I’m Feeling Now” - Lewis Capaldi (Peak: #24)

Who’da thunk it? Good ol’ frog-throat strained-cat Lewis Capaldi nearing the top 10 best hits of the year. Why? Well, he finally went and made an acoustic ballad with emo-pop melodies. I’m kind of simple in that regard. Okay, it’s deeper than that: the song is a pretty open and revealing look into Capaldi’s constant self-doubt, not just of his own success but how he overthinks his words and actions, feeling like he needs to tell a manipulated version of his own truth for the sake of keeping up appearances. It’s not exactly more subtle than the rest of Capaldi’s singles, in fact, I’d argue it ends at a length of unsubtlety he hadn’t reached before, but it starts off pretty simple, with Capaldi’s wordy, lower-register verses over a flickering acoustic guitar. His vocal delivery almost skews pop-punk in the pre-chorus and bridge, to the point where I think a rock cover of this would absolutely kill, especially with that somewhat populist cry for a toast in the chorus, wherein the harmonies are just way too satisfying. It would also however take out some of the oomph of the song - it’s more convincing to hear a man sound unsatisfied when he’s yelling over a comfortable bed of delicate strings and guitars. The song really gets to that idea of not living but just existing, and I think a heavier presentation that fits Capaldi’s vocals would actually be kind of detrimental to what’s uniquely effective about the song. The way the chorus just swings into the bridge of false promises is brilliant before that brilliant, almost Britpop swell in the final refrain is one of my favourite set-ups to a climax in pop music this year. This was a year with a lot of competition for wonderfully-composed and put-together tracks so the fact that Lewis Capaldi ended up pretty high on that list… the bar must be set higher, my friends.

#12

What can I say? She still has it.

#12 - “Tension” - Kylie Minogue (Peak: #19)

Kylie Minogue’s never really - at least in her hits - pre-empted discourse in the way that, say, a Madonna does - although, I know that’s a bit of a sour comparison for both fanbases. Instead, in her hit singles, Kylie tends to hit on two separate bases - pure pop fluff and primal human instinct - usually at the same time, and her voice is iconic as a result of being somewhat of a vehicle of the pop machine in a way that has never felt overly commercial, at least not obsessively so. She plays the “pop queen” character with little off-stage drama, it’s played straight - despite her audience - and surprisingly enough, she’s still playing in those two arenas. “Tension” in particular goes for pure pop fluff in how fixated it is on just hooking the listener with refrain upon refrain, very much like a machine. You have the expected 90s vintage house pianos, Kylie and her choir of multi-tracked Kylies stuttering and repeating words that are so processed you barely even consider they’re words. Instead, they act as vehicles for some of the most noxiously infectious melodies of the year. Since I heard it, I have not been able to go two days without the “touch me right there!” appearing in my head somewhere, which in itself is just a recurring cloud in a sky full of drilled-in choruses, right before that plodding slap house bass drop and a static robot Kylie promising you she doesn’t bite. Every single detail is paid utmost attention, from the panned multi-tracking, the frenetic bass in the post-chorus, the rhythmic echoes in the pre-chorus, the way her “oh-oh”s seamlessly predict the “all night” and “oh my God” refrains that come later. I love when pop music is human but more often than not, I love when pop music is pop music and God, this is so brilliantly constructed from head to toe as a pop song. Oh, and just saying, none of Madonna’s singles this year have even gotten to the tip of this one’s troughs.

#11

You know, one trend in global pop music that was actually coherent and widespread in 2023 was the new fanaticism around “Jersey club” music, a form of EDM which has existed for a long time but gained much of its virality this year and the previous. Even within that genre of blue-balls structureless tracks, this one strikes a bit odd.

#11 - “Just Wanna Rock” - Lil Uzi Vert (Peak: #30)

When I’m in just the right mood for it, I will not experience more joy than when listening to “Just Wanna Rock”, which is bizarre because it’s not exactly a song made for that jumpy pop song bliss. It’s a one-dimensional song, yet its one dimension is already sort of confusing and not easy to latch onto. The song seems to constantly restart itself with the alien synth layers just splattered onto the track with little acknowledgement of how at some point there will be need to be a rhythm to accommodate it, so by the time the lo-fi Jersey club kicks come in, it seems like they’re just placed on there, yet it also creates an entirely new song because of how naturally driving those Jersey club rhythms here. Lil Uzi Vert… I mean, they’re just on a completely different wavelength to any human here, stretching their limited range to Auto-Tuned cries, yelps and whispers all within the span of seconds amidst annoying, echoing producer tags and a beat that just refuses to give up. It’s barely even a song, it’s an assortment of sound effects, yet that’s what so pure about it. The percussion is layered in a way that doesn’t feel entirely sequenced, it seems like a crowd is all snapping alongside Uzi, and the cacophony of sound effects and ad-libs emulates that inhuman and probably intoxicated state. The “song” devolves into Uzi just shouting “BUH!” endlessly over a minimal beat, until even that’s too much and we just get the beat punctuated with a stock vocal loop, and then even THAT’S too much to have so the song restarts again with that synth motif but because that would be too conventional and solid of a resolution, it quickly fades out. It’s an on-edge anticipation fest that lets its bare essentials satisfy instead of really caring for how it’s constructed as a song. I know both of the last three entries I all said were great examples of pop song construction. This is deconstruction. It’s a mess, I admire it. On a related note: DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMN WHOA!

#10

This is also a recent addition, and one I’m very happy just clinched its spot.

#10 - “Back on 74” - Jungle (Peak: #25)

I feel like this one also semi-explains itself, not because it’s some world-gravitating smash hit that everyone and their favourite critic praised to high heavens, but more so because… I mean, have you heard it? It just works. It’s the tightest groove available played on the most clicky ram-shackle percussion section available, with a great vocal from Lydia Kitto that isn’t exactly a high-effort lyrical detail, especially considering the lack of enunciation and complex vocal layering probably wanting to distract you from them, but still reflects that stability of a nostalgic place - a place that becomes a time, and encapsulates everyone who was once there. Those clipping falsetto yelps keep the reminiscent chorus in check by making us realise it’s not a place and time you can experience anymore, but those memories do follow her - in fact, the great use of vocal group harmonies here probably reflect those people and those good times that have made the person who they are. Would they be there if those nostalgic memories weren’t an essential part of her? The twinkling synths, those horns that seem way too glazed to feel real, it’s in many ways a fantasy-sounding song, constructing some kind of ideal reality where she’s never gonna cry anymore. It never answers that pushing question of “where did it all go?” but doesn’t leave it to hang either, just kind of hypothetically accepting the past as what it is, especially with that abrupt switch into the vintage, almost eerie falsetto riffing of the outro. Something can be gone, something can not be there where you want it, and that’s fine… and that’s something I definitely needed to remind myself this year.

#9

Ask me in 15 years what the best hit song of 2023 is and my first response will be “why are you in my home?”, my second will be “only AI has been making songs for the past 10 years” and my third will be “Heaven” by Niall Horan.

#9 - “Heaven” - Niall Horan (Peak: #16)

Out of all the songs on this list, this one feels the most like a timeless British pop song. Much like with “Back on 74”, my leading argument here is - have you heard it? Yet unlike “Back on 74”, it doesn’t take many sonic or structural risks, it stays within the comforting mold it’s already set for itself, but it sets the standard immediately: 10 seconds of a choir so masked in vocal effects that harmonies become as much of a full-fledged phaser as the synths that warp around it, then crashing straight into a semi-acoustic pop rock jingle with an unforgettable bassline and kind of bizarre mastering, honestly, but that’s beside the point. This song is happy and lovestruck and it’s so happy and so lovestruck that it won’t shut up about it, and it’s going to reassure itself of how happy and lovestruck it is until one would understandably get sick of it. The only real risk this song takes structire-wise is that intro and the fact that the pre-chorus doesn’t come in until after the second verse, leaving for that bit of reassurance to only slide in when you could show any glimpse of doubt. The song has a certain ego about it too: “Heaven won’t be the same” - Niall Horan and his lover are so in love that even if the relationship breaks down they will permanently change the fabric of Heaven. And I believe it. He has the desperate belt, wistful multi-tracking, and sheer strength of belief that would convince anyone, especially when singing possibly the best chorus of the year, not just in hit songs. Surely a best chorus of the year would be #1 when it comes to pop songs but realistically the song isn’t some constructional masterpiece, but it has one absolutely lovely emotion that it will drill into you, and I’m personally completely fine with because THIS is true escapism.

#8

I teased earlier that there was a lot to like in this year’s EDM hits, here in the top 10 is when that point starts to be proven.

#8 - “So Much in Love” - D.O.D (Peak: #15)

You know, this actually has a lot in common with “Heaven”, bizarrely. The two songs sound nothing alike, sure, and they’re practically in different tenses - but both are very aware of the fragility of relationships yet yearn for a time of lawless bliss, whilst not taking many risks within their genre to the fullest effect due to how pure the emotion feels and how the songs perfectly slide into place. In D.O.D’s song, the relationship is in past-tense, desperately wanting to “take it back” to the time where their love was all that mattered, with a vocal sample chugging alongside church organs and chopped-up pitch-shifted vocals, as well as increasingly factorial percussion that runs off of its own beeping intensity until the song simply implodes in the drop. Yet the vocal sample continues to ask for peace and love even when there’s practically no melody to be found other than an oddly frenetic bassline jumping on and off a conveyor belt of house percussion, to the point where I think the song would make a great alarm to wake you up in the morning. Yet of course that desperacy comes to a temporary end - that beeping synth stretched on and off of the rhythm, flankering amidst a mix drenched in cloudy reverb and those Goddamn church organs that just really drive the song. Hell, it might be more similar to “Back on 74” in that regard: it just keeps on chugging on, asking but never receiving, allowing for the uglier elements of its percussion to ground the nostalgia. Yet this song never really stays grounded. The looping vocal is constant, honestly kind of annoying, the bass propels the song outside of this world, not back onto ground - the rocket has taken off by the time it really hits, and the vocal loop barely finishes its sentences with how the time of love felt so distant. We get a brief respite in what you could vaguely call an “outro” but it’s still far from grounded. And I just massively overthought a song which uses a stock sample that the Bad Boy Chiller Crew have also cribbed from. Genuinely, why else would you read my blog if not for stuff like that?

#7

Another very recent addition and one I’m incredibly happy to have the opportunity to talk about. Of all people to be in the top 40 as of writing…

#6 - “My Love Mine All Mine” - Mitski (Peak: #8 so far)

I’m not the biggest Mitski fan, to be honest, even if I love a lot of the output I’ve heard from her, and I’ve still yet to check out the full album that this originates from. I’m sure it hits even harder in context, but as a singular track, it’s incredibly touching as well. The main conceit is that Mitski wishes to bank her heart with the Moon, sending her love into the atmosphere so when she’s no longer around, which she accepts as an inevitability, the love that she felt and expressed for not only herself and other people but seemingly love for the world in general, will still be able to shine down on Earth. The second verse brings that second person in and whilst it frames itself as being about another woman, I could easily read it as being about those in her family and close relations in general who outlive her and have shown her how valuable she is a person. Mitski sounds almost disaffected as she sings these limbering verses over a vintage set of pianos and relaxed drums, a beautiful, very Brill Building-sounding composition to me that seems to relish in just acceptance. It’s also important to note how much that love means to her, as Mitski’s struggles to belong are in part dissipated by the value and worth she sees in her own ability to love and care, which she sees as her one true possession, the one thing that won’t cost her. As I get a bit older and have been doing this pop music review for a while, I’m finding a lot more solace in the sense of wisened realism that Mitski portrays here, finding value in her own death as something that may bring the joy and love she took ownership of in life to everyone else on Earth who deserves it, but it never slips out of her hands. It’s still absolutely hers.

Honourable Mentions

Alright, now for our biggest range of Honourable Mentions yet - pop and R&B, and everything that vaguely functions as both or in between. Listen, genres are strange and meaningless in the streaming era, this is just how we’ve got to do it.

“CUFF IT” - Beyoncé

Even when the song isn’t great on its own, Beyoncé is just so much of a presence that this ends up rivalling the best of other pop singers’ discographies.

“Lavender Haze” - Taylor Swift

Taylor Swift was the biggest pop star of 2023, by far. She was the person the media cared most about, the public cared most about, and other celebrities seemed to care most about, creating record-breaking industry moments in music and film, yet most of her output this year were above average remakes of her older songs, so she’s practically a non-presence here, which feels kind of wrong, but hey ho. This is still a great album opener though.

“Creepin’” - Metro Boomin, The Weeknd and 21 Savage

I maintain that getting Travis Scott to replicate the Enya sample may be the most genius production idea anyone had in the past year. The rest of the song is just a pretty good cover of one of the best hit songs ever, that just barely didn’t pass as “not 2023 enough” for inclusion here.

“Calm Down” - Rema

This song is so adorable. I honestly wish I liked it more so there could be more Afrobeats representation in the list.

“My Love” - Leigh-Anne featuring Ayra Starr

Same goes for this one, and it was really close! The standard was just particularly high this year. Yes, I know that D-Block Europe were at #16.

“Jaded” - Miley Cyrus

I have mostly been completely uncaring towards Miley’s output this year, but this is a pretty brilliant pop song.

“UNHEALTHY” - Anne-Marie featuring Shania Twain

I nearly put this song in the final category and considered it a “country” song but even with how much I like the track and its Shania Twain stamp of approval, I think that would be taking the piss.

“You & Me” - JENNIE

If you’re wondering, the hit song this year titled the other way around - “Me & You” by Central Cee - would squarely be in the top 10 worst hit songs of this year. In fact, while we’re here…

The 10 worst hit songs of 2023

Same rules, but keeping it to one song per artist:

#10 - “Chemical” - Post Malone

#9 - “Used to be Young” - Miley Cyrus

#8 - “The Color Violet” - Tory Lanez

#7 - “Search & Rescue” - Drake

#6 - “ONE MORE TIME” - blink-182

#5 - “All My Life” - Lil Durk featuring J. Cole

#4 - “K-POP” - Travis Scott, Bad Bunny and The Weeknd

#3 - “Me & You” - Central Cee

#2 - “Like Crazy” - Jimin

#1 - “Alone” - Kim Petras and Nicki Minaj

None of these should be a surprise to those who followed the weekly series and I refuse to spend more time than I have on songs I really don’t want to give the light of day. Now to continue with those that I do…

#6

I quite rarely have a pure and emotive response to songs I review on the weekly Friday show. I mean, I do to the extent that every response to a piece of art is an emotive response but rarely does a song, even one I really love or hate, take me by the proverbial balls as much as this one did. The only other song to do that this year didn’t reach the top 40. But this one did, and you have no idea how happy it made me.

#6 - “Ready to Fly” - Sub Focus and Dimension (Peak: #29)

This song is just absolutely everything I want a song to be, and I think that’s why it made me so happy on first listen because if you asked me to write down what I think a charting EDM song should sound like, I’m pretty sure this would be the audio version of what I end up noting down. I also gave a pretty in-depth review of this on that week, which feels like ages ago now, but months later, I still get the same rush. The vocals are uncredited, though I think they may be from Jo Hill since she’s credited as a songwriter, and you may not see them as important but I think they emulate the music pretty brilliantly, being stuck in the middle during the pre-drop, simultaneously drowning and rising and just needing someone - or more accurately, something - to lift her up into the sky and the song does just that because this is one of the most immaculately produced hardcore EDM tracks I’ve heard. You actually start in the middle of the action with a weedy synth, a brief flute that seldom comes back amidst the incomprehensible vocal loops overlapping each other like waves crashing into fellow waves on the way to go erode some cliffs. The constant hit of the light drum hit just resting there, testing your patience, until a roll of 90s pianos come in, after the mix have basically already clipped, alongside a perfect drum fill that again, takes its time of a few measures before it gets back into the mix alongside that nasty bass that refuses to bring much attention to itself before it really needs to, crashing into a drum and bass drop that just goes immensely hard, stupidly so, and almost feels alien to the chorus that developed it, so it’s only fitting that same weedy synth eventually erodes that drop in a lathering mysterious soundscape that seems prepared to just copy-paste its drop as the rattling breakbeats, vintage piano… don’t seem all too interested in doing the same thing twice. Instead, they come in more subtly amidst that flute from earlier, until that vocal sample plays - “let’s do it now” - and we get an abrupt bait-and-switch until a four-on-the-floor hardcore kick pushing the rubbery vocal into sounding even more like it’s underwater, with the rest of the song pre-occupied in pushing itself even further into the depths whilst keeping one eye out, extended into the air. This is a journey of a song, and one I don’t think I’ll ever forget my first listen. Now speaking of journeys…

#5

This one also feels a bit obvious, especially if you have talked to me about pop music this year, but unlike the other obvious picks… this one did go a bit further under the radar than “Escapism.”, it isn’t as recent and unexpected as “My Love Mine All Mine” and isn’t exactly my genre as much as “Ready to Fly” or “Heaven”. Despite all of that, it’s higher on the list and was a massive comfort for me this year.

#5 - “ceilings” - Lizzy McAlpine (Peak: #6)

I guess it’s a bit weird that I find this song comforting. After all, it’s got a tense chorus build-up, it’s a pretty heart-aching ballad about nothing described in this idealistic relationship actually being real. Hell, that twist at the end that it was all in past tense and it was practically a fantasy retelling I could even see as being used against the song because it may damage the emotional connection you develop with the song’s narrative… but I call BS on that, because there are various hints dropped towards this relationship being finished; “I have to go”, “it’s so short” - every start of a movie has to have its ending, the twist is built up pretty effectively. Even if it weren’t, I think that outro is just shattering, especially because of the blissful images you get, some detail being left out or kept vague to keep that cinematic scene intact as well as ensuring some of this is far gone in McAlpine’s memory. You can imagine the pictures, framed on the wall, being torn down with that strings swell, the accounts being deleted, everything happening in reverse like it was a real romance film. But it all starts humbly, with that scratchy acoustic guitar, gorgeous vocals from McAlpine, with the microphone picking up a lot of subtle details in her vocal takes that display a lot more character than you’d perhaps expect from someone who’s only having their first hits now. Yet I still wonder why it gives me comfort. I think it’s because now I know the song, its staggered drums, its widening of the almost call-and-response melody in the verses, I know what’s coming and that climax comes as a perfect climax. It’s like a comfort movie, one that’s light watching because you know all the plot beats but it just works for you every time… so really this song does feel like a movie I’ve seen before, and will rewatch again and again. Now, we’ve had a lot of slower or more lyrically heavy songs, and we will finish the list off with them, so let’s have some bitter, pissy fun.

#4

Ahem…  slay, Queen of Tax Evasion! Did I use “slay” right?

#4 - “Shakira: Bzrp Music Sessions, Vol. 53” - Bizarrap and Shakira (Peak: #31)

If you weren’t paying attention, Bizarrap is an Argentine producer who makes freestyle-esque music videos with Latin stars and has a whole YouTube series doing so. Recently, he’s been gathering much bigger stars and this seems to be his peak, as he orchestrated what was practically the comeback for living legend Shakira, and she came back bitingly, with a song fully in Spanish about how she is so awesome. Because she is! And even though the song is an in-depth diss track towards her ex-husband and his affair with a younger woman, it still feels much more about Shakira being back and more passionate than ever. In fact, she basically pulls down her ex’s image in the first verse, revealing that despite the media and press, the version she got of him was the absolute worst version, not worthy of the “champion” label he brands himself given he was one of the most decorated football players of all time. She only shows signs of vulnerability when she can fleetingly twist it into a strength, and everyone - his mother, his new girlfriend - are caught in the crossfire, but once again, it’s all in relation to her, and you can tell even through all the bitterness remaining, that she’s having a lot of cathartic fun with this. It’s not like she’s pulling Bizarrap’s weight here either, as this is not a typical reggaeton beat or anything, this is an intricate synthpop beat full of switch-ups that all feel effortless and like they were done in-studio during the recording, as is the general tone of his video series. The drums hit surprisingly hard amidst the almost condescending 80s pastiche, and that’s where Bizarrap really shines, with those kicks feeling like they accentuate not only Shakira’s insanely catchy melodies but like they punch in at every spare breath she leaves in the take. The popping tropical drums that come in during that wonderfully angry second verse, as well as all the sound effects, make moments that seem out of the blue basically new hooks, and it shows how adaptable the writing of this song truly is, Shakira struck gold with some of the genuinely clever wordplay here, and definitely each pocket she finds here. The interception of her just being an effortless, swaggering presence and the “anything goes” approach Bizarrap brings to percussion creates upwards of 20 massive “moments” that undoubtedly sported this song as a brief yet essential viral comeback hit, and definitely helped the all-Spanish song land in the top 40 in the UK which just never happens. Seriously though, Bizarrap is insane with the drums on this, especially in its final breaths from the trap drop to the final chorus fill to how everything just washes out by the end. God, it’s perfect. Also Shakira please marry me-

#3

One of the cultural touchstones of this year was the… mostly pretty good Barbie movie, with its emotional ending heavily integrating this very song, because no, of course that weird, still-feels-a-bit-forced cultural moment isn’t getting just a fleeting reference in this list.

#3 - “What Was I Made For?” - Billie Eilish (Peak: #1)

Okay, maybe it is. I liked the film but didn’t love it and find a lot more value in this song as a milestone piece in Billie Eilish’s discography and narrative, even if it perfectly fits into Barbie’s as well, than I do as a soundtrack piece. It’s a remarkably simple and mostly very straightforward track in terms of its writing and a lot of its production, but it gives me goosebumps honestly every time. It was a lot lower in this list initially but after listening to it once again, it really deserves to be this high. FINNEAS’ production is at a signature minimalism, with the lowly, distanced pianos, at some point slightly chopped in the mix in the intro, which never stood out to me until now and resonates a lot with me, mostly because of the overall theme of the song which is being identity-less. Eilish, after two very successful albums, has a bit of a “break time” but one mostly littered with touring, press coverage and one-offs like this or that EP from earlier in 2022. The cohesive themes of those last two projects can’t be realised in these loosies, sure, but this one particularly is about a level of uncertainty that’s taken a toll on Eilish’s mental state, especially her self-esteem, as she tries to fit into moulds of femininity that she struggles to see much value in, seeing herself as just a toy, a product, under the microscope of society and pop culture as a whole. This is all handled incredibly delicately and with very straightforward, nearly exclusively monosyllabic lyrics, which I find a really inspired choice amidst the whispery synth mist and gorgeous strings that undercut the song, yet are unable to overshadow Billie, whose voice is - as it often is - straight at the front of the mix, making the song feel incredibly intimate and that you can hear the damage this lack of identity has done to her, especially when her voice trails off from the multi-tracked harmonies to a mumbling croak in the chorus. That speck of hope in how she’s never silenced, never fallen victim to the surrounding instrumentation, makes her feel like much less of a burden: it’s an optimistic song, ultimately, knowing that whilst she may not be able to fit into the characters pre-designed and chosen for her, she can be happy, and she’s made to be happy, and will wait until she is, regardless of how long it takes. I adore this song, I didn’t think it’d end up this high initially but the more I think about it, the more it really registers with me at the moment and it’s brilliantly pulled off. FINNEAS is an excellent producer and the tiny little details he places here are just perfectly sequenced for what he needs to convey. In fact, he’s so good he may or may not be on the list twice.

#2

This list really did not mean to be one song per artist. I kept it that way for the worst list so I don’t look like a hater but for the best list, it really just was a diverse enough group of high-quality songs. This next one, however, is the one technical exception.

#2 - “Never Felt So Alone” - Labrinth (Peak: #33)

For those of you who haven’t heard it, this song features uncredited vocals from Billie Eilish. Would the song be good without her? I mean, it could have gotten into the Honourable Mentions, but the real reason this is an exception to the one-song-per-artist rule is because of how integral the duet dynamic is in this track.

There are almost too many layers to this despite it only being two and a half minutes, I don’t know where to start. So firstly, this is a break-up song where we get two different perspectives, one from Labrinth and the other from Billie, though how much more Labrinth gets to say is also really interesting, but we’ll get to that. They both have jarringly separate perspectives that come to the same conclusion of loneliness, like one half of their very being has been cut off quite suddenly, though with Labrinth, that seems to come with troughs of aspirations, a lot of which make him seem more important. A drunken, broken man sitting in his car not able to finish his sentences without Billie’s voice chiming in for the harmony, slowly going insane after a break-up not because of a mutual love and appreciation but rather because of how Billie had formed such an integral part of Labrinth’s identity. He calls himself “this” and “this man”, dehumanising and depersonalising himself into a figurine rather than a coherent human being, thinking about how little of a purpose he serves without his ex-partner. The pre-chorus, interestingly only sang once, evokes marriage with the “all-white leather”, and sees Billie as the interior to Labrinth’s exterior ego, building this relationship up as something that formed his character rather than forming a real bond, especially with Eilish’s fleeting backing vocals that reference her “dying somewhere in the dark” - it’s not her that was important to him, it’s how she made him appear and feel externally, with her acting as the fuel for both his esteem and his downward spiral. The imagery of the “whip” and its “interior” just furthers this idea that Billie was little more than a vehicle for Labrinth’s own motivation. Eilish, who gets a short excerpt of a verse, sings of the betrayal she feels, wishing that she could have seen the red flags from the beginning, and now being able to stand back and see the relationship for what it is, it seems like Labrinth was just on the chase for something to fulfil him and saw that in the relationship, rather than the “new best friend” Billie thought she found. Instead of the entire world falling apart like in Labrinth’s verse, Billie takes ownership of that world that fell apart, because it was her worldview and perspective that Labrinth took advantage of.

Oh, yeah, this is a music list, not a poetry sound. How does it sound? Well, when you have Labrinth on co-production with FINNEAS and Fred again.., you can almost confirm those little perfect narrative details and this is a pretty wonky song in all its melancholy, even coming off as slightly goofy at times due to just how disarticulated it is structure-wise, often paralleling its lyrics. You start with distorted yelps that seem to have no relation to the song’s composition before a solid, stagnant alternative R&B beat comes in, with each snare feeling so unnecessarily spare. Labrinth’s backing vocals are rendered by the production chopping them up as incoherent drunken babbling, processed to feel even less natural and human, excommunicating him from Billie’s idealistic view of him even further. It’s an immaculate, genius production and hits so hard, especially with the bass in the second chorus and how the song continues to empty itself, build up more layers only for the vocal leads to become even more sparing and fragmented; I don’t think I’ve ever heard Billie as loose as she is on than on this verse. An overall excellent song, not one I’d even expect to chart, and whilst it may not tell the more personal, resonant story out of the two Eilish songs on this list, it has a much grander and compelling narrative to tell that I think perfectly aligns, yet not seamlessly, with the sonics of the track. Yet… it’s not my #1.

Honourable Mentions

Now, before the #1, for our final sweep of Honourable Mentions: rock, indie, alternative, folk, country, whatever the Hell that wasn’t already covered.

“How Does it Feel” - Tom Grennan

I’m so happy Tom Grennan finally won me over. It feels like he’s been cock-teasing me with music that should be better than it is for like two years.

“Rich Men North of Richmond” - Oliver Anthony Music

My lawyer advised me not to comment on this one.

“Life Goes On” - Ed Sheeran

Ed Sheeran had a low-key year despite his several releases, and I feel like this pretty heart-breaking ballad exemplifies his best moment in recent years quite  well.

“Say Yes to Heaven” - Lana Del Rey

“A&W” peaking at #41 is why I lose sleep at night. For the record, “Paris, Texas” peaked at #48 and was the only other song to make me have a noticeably emotive response on first listen during the chart show. If they peaked in the top 40, I can’t confirm where either song would be but chances are at least one would be in my top five.

“Cha Cha Cha” - Kaarija

I’m pretty sure this song qualifies for every honourable mention sub-category.

“I Remember Everything” - Zach Bryan featuring Kacey Musgraves

If this were “Spotless” instead, or “Jake’s Piano - Long Island”, or “East Side of Sorrow”, or “Holy Roller”, or “Smaller Acts”… okay, really most tracks would do from that Zach Bryan self-titled album, chances are I’d have a country song actually make the list proper.

“Black Friday” - Tom Odell

I still haven’t fully come to terms with this one exactly. I think I’ll regret not giving it a place in a few months but for now, I don’t think I can coherently write about what makes it so special. Ironically, that’s also a problem I face somewhat with my #1 pick.

#1

So, this is a weird one. It’s definitely not following the trend of my #1 hit songs, if I really have a trend in that department. It feels much simpler, much more transcendent and also much less reflective of the year as a whole. It’s also not one I gave an initially positive review. In fact, I was quite negative in my first review so I think I grew to love the song in the way one grows to love a younger sibling. There was a weird journey with this song that I didn’t have with any of the other 19 - every single one of those got beaming reviews from the outset. In fact, I’m sure you could argue every single one of those 19 songs is better than this one, or at least more unique, more reflective of my mood this year, the events and trends in pop music of this year, if you can really create a coherent list of that. If there’s one thing I wanted to do this year though, in a year of exhausting change in my life and seemingly everything surrounding it, it was to be in a state of not thinking. Some kind of bizarre hypno state where I don’t need to go through any physical or mind hurdles to enjoy myself. More than anything, I wanted to be whelmed. There is one song that never overwhelmed or underwhelmed me this year, one that I could go to for comfort, even when I didn’t really consider myself as liking the song. Hell, that’s how I started liking it: I would just listen to it because I wanted something I knew wouldn’t in some way challenge me. Maybe I’m just shallow and nervous or I’m getting older and realising what I want pop music to do is not to surprise me or innovate before our eyes. I just want something to know, to make me feel, but maybe not to make me react.

#1 - “REACT” - Switch Disco featuring Ella Henderson and Robert Miles (Peak: #4)

I really don’t even know where to begin with this one, or where to end. A lot of the songs within the top 20 and the Honourable Mentions exist in some way to surprise, energise, compel - I’m not sure if this song exists to make me feel anything. I’m sure it has a pretty good effect in nightclubs, but it seems too watery and transparent to be played there often. It would sound terrible when on a compressed car radio, and it’s too programmed to be effectively performed live without major adjustments. It does little to surprise - it uses the classic “Children” sample from the late Robert Miles to great effect but it’s not like that’s new. In fact, I called it a “cut-and-paste job” in my initial review, which really was quite uncharitable of me looking back at it: the sample’s most prevalent in the chorus but its piano motifs maintain a cute presence within the verses and pre-chorus, and the original song’s thematic purpose seems pretty well implemented. The original song has a certain eerieness to it but only if you over-think its dated acoustic guitars and new-age sensibilities, which only intend to allow for each echoed rain droplet to find its way back to the pond after adventuring to your bedroom or car window. Fittingly for a trance song, it’s practically trance-inducing, not because it’s mind-numbingly repetitive but because it is utter submersion into a world you don’t even want to think about, and instead just experience. I’m sure Robert Miles would see no purpose in what I’m doing analysing his gorgeous instrumental piece. It’s to be experienced, enjoyed - it’s to be felt, not explained. And to be clear, it is really difficult to explain what makes “Children” so special, and that’s equally true for “REACT”, which packages the catchiest elements of Miles’ composition into a modern pop song. That should feel wrong, right? It should feel like a misfire. But instead, it’s beautiful: the world becomes routine, wonderland becomes the expected. Within a year where I felt like everyone was happening at once in both my personal life and the world as a whole, I want to be able to turn my brain off, and only “REACT”, ironically, could stop those chemicals in my brain from moving to conclusions. That first line, “24/7, on my mind, day and night, all the time, you ain’t even by my side” has always resonated with me: “REACT” is a love song but that line has always felt like it reflected how constant and comforting the music is, even if it’s far from tangible. Every part of this song, from the cheap finger-snaps to the alluring backdrop of its Robert Miles sample, to the factorial percussion somehow forming a human patter on the liquid house production, and especially those moments that just hit like routine for me each time: the acoustic guitars in the pre-chorus, that final drop just being the embrace of all that is simple and human.

“REACT” doesn’t really say anything pop music or 2023 as a year in the grand socio-political sense, I think it just says something about me and how I wanted to live and feel this year, which is a refreshing thing to say when the default mode of communication is toxic discourse. I’m definitely pontificating about this song more than intended or maybe deserved, but I’m not going to say music is of any less inherent value based on its structure and form, how it sounds, what it samples, what chart placement it reached. Art’s value is found in how you REACT.

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Just kidding, “fukumean” by Gunna is actually #1. Eeyup! Thank you for reading and I’ll see you next week!

[jasper-borealis]

Personal post time babyyyyy

did I just bomb a crap ton of reblogs after not going on this site for almost 3 months, and now I'm going to rant? you betcha!!!

ok sooooooooo, I'm not having a good time with my faith. I have grown up my entire life as a member of the Wisconsin Evangelical Lutheran Synod (or WELS for short) and for awhile now I just…I can't say I agree with their stances on…a lot.

what kinda scares me is that there are some folks who follow me who are highly involved members, and I'm honestly kinda scared of them sending this post to my family…so you know who you are, please please don't share this post with my family.

honestly if I tried to put all my grievances with the WELS in this post, it would be the length of the journal entries I write in a fugue state, so I'm not going into all of it. But my biggest issues I have are A. they way they go about reading the holy texts, B. how strongly political they get (some are better then others, but others…), and C. their internal synodical doctrines (Prayer fellowship is one of the biggest for me)

How they read the holy texts. as I've been studying theology, and the bible, more and more, I've been finding I take massive issues with a litteralist reading of the western cannon of the bible. I find that the bible makes much much much more interal, spiritual, and logical sense, when you read a majority of the bible as Wisdom Literature. I still read the Gospels (Matthew, Mark, Luke, John) as basically inerrant, and the Pentateuch (Genesis, Exodus, Leviticus, Numbers, and Deuteronomy) and mostly inerrant with stories/parables mixed in. The WELS' official way to read the bible is as 100% literal, and thus must be applied to our modern day directly [except those pesky verses about slavery, those they don't take literally (although some do…and it's terrifying), because ya know…they aren't hypocritical at alllllllll] and I just do not see strong reasons for reading the texts that way, I understand why they do…but I don't agree with it.

-How Strongly Political they get "a few years ago, some black robed heathens announced that gay marriage was totally fine. are you going to listen to some black robed heathens? or the eternal God who instituted marriage in the first place"…….this is a almost direct quote from a sermon a month ago, so ya know…totally Apolitical and able to reap those fun tax except status perks… this was just one thing…while the WELS is better then a lot of churches, and the church body mostly stays out of things…they don't do much to stop pastors and individual churches from becoming a propaganda branch of the political right wing…

-their internal synodical doctrines The WELS is full of internal doctrines on how things work…and the biggest one I have issue with is their doctrine of "Prayer fellowship" it basically states they WELS members are not to ever pray, or worship, and any non WELS members. the only exception is when the member themself is running the worship service, or leading the prayer. the WELS gives biblical verses that "support" this doctrine (just like the verses they use to say women can't vote in any internal church affair, or hold any religious position, I.E Pastor, Elder, President.) I have looked at these verses for a long time, and while I understand why they get those positions from those verses, I just don't agree with them at all. It all comes from a literalist (and context blind) understanding of the texts, and I just can not say in good faith that I agree with them in any way shape or form.

This all comes in tandem with the knowledge that I am going to be Excommunicated sometime this year…why? because I'm a big ol fruit. I tried for YEARS, to not be queer. I did everything, I prayed night and day, I self harmed constantly, like some kinda Augustinian monk, to purge these "fleshly lusts" from my body…for two years. I begged God to kill me almost every night…the only reason I didn't do the deed myself, was because I was afraid if I took my own life…I would end up in the fires of hell…I also didn't want my family to be heart broken…cause I love them all so much, and I just didn't want to hurt them… To say that these years left lasting scares, is a understatement. I have only recently, through the help of friends and a therapist God put in my life, have been able to live with a sliver of hope in my future. every time I get punched…or slap myself…I am instantly reminded of my self harm (I hit myself with my fists as my main source of pain). to say that I will be working on undoing this mess for years so come, is obvious, but fortunately, I see light at the end of the tunnel, and every day had been getting better. I accepted my Queerness about 9 months ago. I changed my mind, when a friend sent me some theological sources, and talked to me about it…and it took awhile, but I eventually changed my mind about how I was destined for hell for something I tried, and couldn't change. Initially…it was terrifying…what was I going to do? basically everything I ever thought was true was under question…and even after basically spending every day of these past few months in furious study…I still don't know all the answers, but I am confidant enough to say I do not think that God has any issue with queerness.

So now my life has changed, from one of intense self hatred and depression, to one of constant low boiling fearand terror…I am closeted, because my mother and father are very homophobic and transphobic, and I am terrified of what will happen when they find out…do you know what that does to somebody? to love your family so deeply, and your parents to love you deeply back…but behind every hug, is the knowledge…that they hate so vehemently, something so thoroughly ingrained in who I am…that they don't know about…it honestly sucks so much. I cantor (lead the hymns) at my church, and my church loves me for it, and I'm very popular over all with my fellow parishioners…but knowing that every smile, and "thank you so much for singing today!" or "Oh you did so well! I always love your voice"…will be wiped away when I come out of the closet…

I am planning on coming out sometime later this year…when? I'm not sure…but I know I can't keep this mask up for much longer…because while I don't self harm, and my mental health is slightly better over all…living a lie to your family because you know they will hate you…is kinda a drag on the ol brain. I've come out to two of my siblings, I have 6, so I came out to the two sisters closest to me ( I love all my siblings hugely, but these two I have just been slightly closer to) and both of them are chill, one of them made it very clear that she was here for me, and that when the time comes, she will do her best to do damage control….and the other basically went "Ya no shit Sherlock" and has been chill about it (both reactions where kinda hilarious, and I love them even more for it) Once The WELS hears of my coming out…I will immediately be called for a "Church discipline meeting" aka a inquisition with the elders and pastor, where they will try and get me to recant my "sins"…but as a famous theologian said-

"Unless I am convinced by the testimony of the Holy Scriptures or by evident reason-for I can believe neither pope nor councils alone, as it is clear that they have erred repeatedly and contradicted themselves-I consider myself convicted by the testimony of Holy Scripture, which is my basis; my conscience is captive to the Word of God. Thus I cannot and will not recant, because acting against one’s conscience is neither safe nor sound. Here I stand. I cannot do otherwise. So Help Me God. Amen" -Martian Luther, Diet of worms, 1521.

-so I honestly don't think I will even bother to go to that meeting…because I don't want to go through that hurling of fire and brimstone. I honestly think I will just send a email in response…and just let them decide how to go about it. Will there be consequences for this? yes… but God is with me…amen.

[twinhood-2dot0]

My Turn Ons (in fiction) aka Attack On Titan/Chainsaw Man obsessive appreciation post

I started writing this post about what I liked to see in works of fiction, but uhhhh it quickly devolved into just praising every aspect of those previously mentioned mangas. Look I swear I like more than these two, they just seem to hit every single one of my spots??? These are the first works of fiction I really obsess over because of the plot and the storytelling and not just characters and worldbuilding. Like, most of my favourite franchises are mostly because of characters. DC, Rick Riordan stuff, one certain novel series that feels fills me with rage just thinking about, you know the one, you get the point. Also, I'm writing this while watching a video overanalysing Attack On Titan story arcs :P. Okay, that's it for my explanation for why this turned into a post singing praises, the rest is what I started writing and am too lazy to edit the intro for.

I spend a lot of time on TVTropes. And significantly more time obsessing over the new work of fiction that I just discovered and fell absolutely in love with. And recently, I’ve found out a few things that make anything instantly a favorite for me. Lemme list them in no particular order.

1.Death. Obviously. You probably saw that coming from lightyears away. I really love works of fiction that do not shy away from killing off fan favorites and well established characters unceremoniously. Examples include Attack On Titan, Chainsaw Man, The Walking Dead, Avengers: Infinity War to a lesser extent because of the events of Endgame, The Suicide Squad, the Arkham Series, I mean uhhh do games count, since Batman has died at least like 20 times by my hand and other characters too because I just wanted to see them die? Anyways, the Arkham series also has a huge canon death count of huge characters.

2. Sudden Tonal Shift. I love when stories start off as goofy and comedic and suddenly shift to dark and depressing in a matter of seconds. Examples include Chainsaw Man, Attack On Titan (yeahh, it’s kind of spoiling it, but dw, you won’t see it coming), AoT to a lesser extent because it is one tone throughout, but shifts how it is approached suddenly and quite often, and Your Name.

3. Female and LGBTQ+ characters. I… don’t really know how to explain this. Basically uhhh I want every single character treated the exact same way. Idk how to really explain it, so lemme use some examples. I feel like Attack On Titan has the best female and LGBTQ characters. Okay, okay, I know I say that AoT is like the best work of fiction ever created a crap ton, but really, I’ve yet to see anything that did female characters soooo well. One of the few things that made me despise anime is their female characters. Let’s see here. Death Note, there is one female character in the main cast and her whole purpose is… fawning over the main character. There is literally nothing else that she does. And another manga that I had the displeasure of reading as a kid is Fairy Tail. It’s led by a female character, which you might think is a good thing but… she’s so sexualised like oml like wtf the solution to every problem is not “sex appeal”. I’m not even joking, the phrase “sex appeal” is probably more used than “Fairy Tail”, and My Hero Academia is good enough ig? They have pretty strong female characters but not very well written imo, and, well, this character’s outfit exists.

Also yikes I found this.

She’s a minor, for god’s sake. There are quite a few more characters with questionable outfits and questionable writing but I don’t want this post to get gigantic. To be clear, I am not singling out just a select few mangas and calling the whole industry sexist. There are a lot of stories with strong women who aren’t overly sexualised, but shounen is pretty much the most popular demographic, written by mostly men aimed for adolescent boys, so that lends itself to these issues (Also, sidenote, I have no idea where the line between shounen and seinen is. I’ve read just one seinen, Parasyte: The Maxim, and I’ve read shounen like Attack On Titan, Chainsaw Man, and Fire Punch, and that felt like they had more sexual themes and nearly as much gore and violence?).

So why do I like Attack On Titan’s female characters? The story never really concerns itself with gender. It is pretty much true equality, and it actually has female characters that contribute so much to the plot and stand on their own apart from the main character (don’t you dare say Mikasa, that’s a can of worms you do not wanna open even among the piles of worms that are all my posts.). Also, look at the art of the characters.

(Actually, I prefer their manga art. Much more androgynous. As perfect as the anime is, I hate that they made them female. I loved the fact that their gender was up to the reader's interpretation in the manga. Hajime Isayama even got mad at the translators for using female pronouns for them in the English translation.)

Okay, not exactly the best picture, but I just loved that panel so much :P.

Also they are explicitly called male in the manga and then female in the anime?

Those are just a few examples, but no one has very gendered features in the main cast. It’s a thing I noticed recently, but no one grows a beard??? And so many male characters have long hair so even that’s not a distinction you could make. Anyways, my point is, there is no distinction. Strong women fighting against male domination is all well and good but like, I want stories like these more, where women are equals. And the one (maybe two) lesbian characters are so like natural too.

Chainsaw Man also does this surprisingly well. The main character, Denji, is a certified pervert.

A few panels from the first few chapters.

So safe to say, I wasn’t expecting great female characters. And I was proven wrong. I don’t want to give away too much, but it has some very top tier female characters. Some western examples include DC, obviously, with Batgirl being my absolute favourite, and characters like Harper Row, Cassandra Cain and Stephanie Brown also being some of my favourites. American comics generally don’t have a great reputation when it comes to female characters, like look at some of the costumes from older comics

I started reading Batgirl: A Celebration of 50 Years and holy hell, did men not know how to write women at all, like what in the actual hell is this

Down to her "pretty toes"??? Seriously?

Ah yes, women put on makeup while fighting.

Ah yes, women apply makeup while fighting. But I’m glad to see how far DC has come, with how much of a badass she is now. I’m not going to get into novels, there are a crap ton of novels I could cite for having good female characters, and a lot of being written by women too.

4. What the F did I just read. I like dark humor and dark stuff in general. So I love reading stuff that make me just pause and take in what I just read. All of Tatsuki Fujimoto's works (Chainsaw Man, Fire Punch, Goodbye, Eri, Little Sister's Elder Sister) get more and more deranged than the last, and The Boys too get very insane, and James Gunn stuff also tend to be uhhh weird, to say the least.

5. Extremely careful storytelling..? idk what to call it. Basically, a combination of the extreme opposite of writing by the seat of their pants, an extreme version of Chekhov's gun, and a good mystery. See, every story has it's twists and turns, but what I love is when there's a ton of foreshadowing and one that makes you go "OMG THE CLUES WERE THERE ALL ALONG, HOW DID I NOT NOTICE ANYTHING WHAT THE HELL" on a rewatch, and stories where every single moment and small detail contributes hugely to the plot. I've experienced the story of Attack On Titan three times... kinda? I kinda simultaneously read and watched Attack on Titan the first time, like reading season 1 then watching a few episodes, reading a bit, then watching, you get the point, then I went back and watched the episodes that I read and read the episodes that I watched and I'm currently rewatching it all because the last season came out like an year ago??? MAPPA takes on too much work and then make their workers suffer, anyways, not a can of worms I wanna open now. Anyways, what I'm saying is, every single detail is thought out and have some kinda symbolism or foreshadowing. Damn, I'm trying to find a meme, but I can't, but it's basically someone getting mad with the text saying something like "When your friends don't pay attention to the flowers and the birds (it is foreshadowing)".

Also, I'm also rewatching Chainsaw Man... after finishing watching and reading it less than a month ago, and most of the words spoken take on a new meaning after finishing it.

:P I'm sorry, idk any western media that has done this so well, so these are the only two examples you get.

6. Music. I can't believe I didn't remember this till now. I don't think I need to elaborate again? I've written like three posts about this already. That said, nothing even compares to Attack On Titan.

Yeah that's all I can think of :P. I'm about 14 hours late but meh.

[ostrich-on-a-rampage-blog]

NSJSSJXBBDSHNDC FACK I'VE BEEN IN LOVE WITH THE CRUTCHIE/JESSE THEORY SINCE I FIRST SAW THAT POST IN THE HEIGHT OF THE TUCK FANDOM LAST SUMMER & NOW I FOUND YOUR FICS & HOLY SHIT ARE THEY AMAZING! YOU CHARACTERIZE JESSE JUST LIKE I DO & I FUGGIN LOVE YOU! MAYBE IF YOU WANT TO WRITE MORE MAYBE MILES & JACK LEAVE TO FIND JESSE?

Thank you so much!! I’m glad you’re enjoying everything. (And I definitely agree. I wholeheartedly support the theory that Crutchie and Jesse are actually the same person.) I actually am working on a Part 5 about that! I don’t exactly when I’ll post it, because I’m simultaneously working on Chapter Five of Crutchie, Cursed and a couple of jackcrutchie one-shots, but it will be out there soon(ish)!! Thank you once again!!

[myballsyourballs]

hello !! can I request headcons for Bakugo, Izuku and Todoroki (separately), where they are secret admirers of gn reader? I just need them in their facet of secret lovers (｡ﾉω＼｡)

thx, have a good day !! ♡

secret admirer?

bakugo, midoriya, todoroki (seperate) x gn! reader

warnings: none

genre: fluff headcanons

masterlist | make a request | part two | part three

bakugo !

now this guy isn't very subtle

but he is smart

while being your secret admirer, he'd definitely carefully plan out when to place gifts so you didn't find out, and to change his handwriting just a little

HOWEVER

he can't control his raging jealousy when you're around anyone who he thinks is even remotely romantically interested in you

blows up at them (literally and metaphorically)

wouldn't be openly nice to you since that's not really his style

but he definitely won't try and kill you

what a bonus

he'd say shit like

"good morning dickface." with a straight face

its his version of being nice.

he would write drafts of what his notes will be in some of his notebooks or when he's bored

the sort of gifts he would give wouldn't be chocolates

wayyyy too basic for him

he'd bake you shit if you like sweet things, or if you don't he'd cook you something he'll know you'll like

and he'll make it with perfection

baking or cooking this man is a god at it

so, if he's your secret admirer

expect neatly written notes with really good food to go along with it.

basically, he'd put a crap-ton of effort into his gifts for you. only the best for the best, right?

has definitely planned out what to do if you find out

he'd either just straight up confess or probably gaslight you into thinking its not him if he's embarrassed

🤷‍♂️

unfortunate but true

izuku !

mann he'd be such a cute secret admirer

he would be very blush-y and awkward around you

i don't think he'd be very good at hiding it (he isn't very pro at keeping secrets)

would either be close friends with you or is trying to actively become friends with you during this

very enthusiastic to get your attention

"hi [Y/N]!" "good morning, [Y/N]!" "are you having a good day?"

he's gotta stay close to you, yk?

definitely stares

a fond kind of "in-love" stare

and he does it a lot

he doesn't get jealous very easily, so in that sense he isn't very obvious

for gifts, he'll definitely get you some special stuff

limited edition hero merch, comics, chocolates and other snacks, pages of hero analysis

limited edition hero merch would be wrapped in nice paper (albeit badly) with a cute little note stuck on the top

comics he would also wrap

chocolates and snacks he would put into a little container or bag to put on your desk

he'd probably dedicate an entire hero analysis notebook to you -- which he would give as a gift once he was finished (although that is a pretty big hint to who he is)

he would definitely write the longest notes out of anyone

i mean like an entire page long per day

full of absolute sweetness

tooth rotting fluff put into a note

very very adorable

todoroki !

the most subtle of them all.

could literally be a spy from how secret he is.

only indication is the fact that he stares a lot

and even then its barely noticeable

although he is very secret, he would be friends with you

he probably wouldn't romantically like someone he wasn't friends with

he would be more friendly with you than others

would doodle pictures of you in his notebooks

for gifts

i'm gonna be honest

his dad is he is loaded

he's gonna spoil the shit out of you

i'm talking designer brands, shiny mahogany pens with your initials on them, chopsticks with customised engravings on them, tickets to concerts you talk about, gift cards, etc etc.

his notes are short, but very sweet.

for example

he gifts you a watch? "a watch -- so you can stop coming in late and i can see your face earlier"

he'd draw a little heart next to it too

short but sweet

that's his motto for this

gifts would be perfectly wrapped

either in a box or wrapped in paper

as well as these gifts, he'd give you some of the doodles he does

they might not be the best but its the thought that counts

a very caring secret admirer

[fcrrokinetic]

♦

Salty salty salty

♦ What was a mildly annoying thing that has happened to you rp wise?

//When I was writing in another fandom, I decided one day to reblog a meme basically asking people to send me drabble requests. This one person who I had just become mutuals with like, two days prior and had not yet interacted with sent in a drabble request, asking me to write a drabble about their character. Not their character and mine, just theirs.

Normally this would not be a huge problem, but they wrote one of those canon characters that has like two lines of dialogue and there is literally no background for, so it's effectively an original character. And they gave me no base information to work with, just the prompt. So I had to do a crap ton of digging and research to figure out how this person I have never spoken to and who just followed me two days ago would have wanted this scene written... Long story short I wrote the drabble bc I'm a pushover and don't like being mean to people, but that was entirely too much work for, like, 350 words of text.

[lirlovesfic]

wait so what's the deal with the whole wedding thing i'm kind of curious now

I’m probably not the best person to ask, because I haven’t been a dean x cas shipper for long (maybe a year or two) and I don’t have all the background/behind the scenes stuff memorized, but I’ll do my best. For anyone else reading, the following is long and will contain a crap ton of spoilers, so I’ll put it under a cut.

I’m not sure how much you follow Supernatural, but I’m going to assume you only know the basics: Dean and Sam Winchester are monster hunters extraordinaire and over the course of the series they take on--in addition to vampires, werewolves, and ghosts--the apocalypse, heaven, hell, angels, demons, Lucifer, and ultimately God himself. Season Four introduces the character of Castiel, an angel who saves Dean from hell. Over the course of the rest of the series, in addition to all the other things that are going on, the writers/producers/powers-that-be develop the relationship between Cas and Dean. The subtext is romantic: long lingering looks, hugs that last a little too long to be strictly platonic, and on and on and on and on. If the two characters involved were male and female, it would be obvious that the writers were building a slow burn romance between them. But they weren’t. They were both male. So at the same time as the powers that be were clearly hinting at a romance between the two, the official line was that there was no romance, it was strictly platonic, they were just good friends, yada yada yada, ignore the man behind the curtain. And one thing that was really significant was that one of the characters, Dean, was written as the classic, archetypical American male, someone who loved guns, fast cars, hot chicks, junk food, and rock and roll, so CLEARLY it COULDN’T be a GAY relationship. Throughout the years, the storylines would take the relationship right to the brink of being canon and then drag it back. Over and over and over again. The show began to be accused of queerbaiting, and for good reason.

Fast forward (and I’m sorry I’m making this so long, but bear with me), and we’re at the last few episodes of the last season, and Cas unequivocally declares that he’s in love with Dean. Destiel is now literal, actual canon. Less than two minutes later, Cas is killed. It’s a common trope known as “bury your gays”, the idea that if you’ve got a good, openly gay character in a show, they always get killed off. Actually, I have a hunch that with Cas dying like a minute and a half after coming out of the closet, Supernatural may have set a new landspeed record in that trope. Anyway, Cas is dead, Dean is seen grieving, and then, despite the close relationship that Cas had with all the remaining characters, he’s basically not mentioned in the last two episodes. It was like he hadn’t existed. Fans were rightfully pissed, and not just the Dean x Cas shippers. It wasn’t fair to the character, it wasn’t fair to the storyline, it certainly wasn’t fair to the actor who portrayed Castiel, it just was a bad scene all around.

And then came the finale, imho the worst episode of the entire series and possibly the worst finale in the history of finales. (One person’s opinion, please don’t @ me, lol.) Although I know not everyone agrees, a huge portion of the fandom was very, let’s say, disappointed with the series conclusion. And these days, when fans are disappointed in canon, they don’t take it sitting down. As AO3 and tumblr can attest to, fans will take matters in their own hands and rewrite it as they see fit. In this case, to give Dean and Cas some kind of happy ending.

And that’s basically what happened. Only some of the fans were a little bit more famous than the ordinary person sitting at home watching the CW. A few weeks ago, on Dean Winchester’s birthday, one former cast member (I think it was Felicia Day but don’t quote me because I couldn’t find the original tweet) wished Dean a happy birthday on twitter and said she knew he and Cas were happy together in heaven. The fandom went nuts. Then less than a week ago, two different former cast members, Chad Lindberg and Samantha Ferris, began tweeting in character about the reopening of the Roadhouse (a bar and grill in the early seasons of Supernatural) and talking about taking bookings for weddings and other events, along with a discussion of stuff going on on Valentine’s Day. The fandom ran with it, and the idea that Dean and Cas were getting married in the Roadhouse on Valentine’s Day took on a life of its own. And trended pretty high on twitter today, too.

Anyway, I hope that answers your question. Sorry this was so long, but I write 100k word fics regularly because I obviously don’t know how to edit down. ;)

[maji-matchups]

Matchup please! I'm 5'5 and really skinny. My sign is leo and I'm an INFP. I can be outgoing and playful but am generally shy around new people. I love to play video games and love watching anime, but I also like writing short stories. One of my favorite places to go is the beach. Oh and I really love idol music as well :)

Hi nonie dear! Sorry this took quite a bit to get to, I’m sure you’ve heard from the other matchups but this has been a really busy week for Mod Otoya and I with choir and school crap, but we’re back!!

I match you with~~~ Syo Kurusu!!! I don’t know if it’s because he’s one of my faves and I’m an INFP but I feel like he suits an INFP s/o don’t y’all think? Anyway you two would have such an adorable dynamic, whenever you’re feeling more outgoing you guys would be super playful, teasing each other, making fun of each other, playful fighting, stuff like that, but when you’re all worn out and out of steam he’s perfectly content calming down and just listening to the others ramble and talk while you guys are pretty much off in your own world with you curled up to his side or even on his lap if you don’t mind PDA (This is basically a description of my INFP friend and her boyfriend they’re actual goals goddd) 

He finds it adorable how you get really shy around strangers or intimidating people and is always ready to Step Up and Protect you or just help you warm up to them and be more comfortable in said person’s presence. I have a huge trouble with wanting to talk to people but being too scared to because of social anxiety and I feel like he would totally be the type of friend to help you out to the best of his capabilities if something like that happens to you too. He loves going to the beach with you and no not just because he gets to see you in a swimsuit, just the beach is a generally really fun and high energy place which is what Syo is all about. 

His music taste is like literally action anime soundtracks which I can see you guys binge watching together if you like action anime--if not he might just force you to watch it in the same way you would force him to watch your favorite shows that he isn’t interested in (and would secretly actually like by the end of it) He finds your writing really cool, and loves reading it over whenever you allow him to see since he could pretty much feel you and your thought process behind it which is the greatest thing in his opinion because it shows how well he knows you. 

Other possible matchups include Masato Hijirikawa!! (I don’t know why but both Mod Otoya and I headcanon him as like super literate and stuff -probably because of his background- which would be cool since he’d give you like tons of encouragement on your short stories, plus he’s a bit on the quieter side which is a nice contrast to your overall outgoing nature) or Ai Mikaze!! (He’s totally intrigued by how different you act when you’re with friends as opposed to when you’re with strangers, and he would be your video game buddy!) 

I hope this didn’t disappoint and as always have a lovely day!

Mod Ai

[thisgirlhastales]

after that last anon you answered, i'm now curious about how you pace your stories! i'm usually a little too excited for all the things i want to happen, so i do a lot of skipping ahead and getting to the meat for a fast-paced story. but!! your space cowboy stories are SO GOOD and i know they wouldn't be the same with my kind of pacing, so yeah. i'm curious ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Hi there, honey! :D *hugs*

Okay, this was another question I had to think about for a long time … I often conflate pacing and overall story structure, so fair warning, that is probably gonna happen here.

I’m going to start off with a fairly obvious fact, which is that different stories require different pacing, and that the rules in fanfiction, I find, are a little looser.

This is because we rarely need much exposition in fanfiction, since we’re assuming our readers already know these characters and these settings, so we don’t have to worry too much about explanations or descriptions. That being said, there is always some world-building (particularly in AUs), and that can be pretty challenging to insert without disrupting the … narrative flow, I guess?

There’s a sort of … ebb and flow, overall, to a story. There are quiet times and loud times. There’s talking and then there’s action. Now, the other reason why I say fanfiction is different is because I am perfectly happy reading a story that is literally just characters being domestic, or having emotional conversations (communication, I love it so much) or … every other fun trope in fandom.

I think the way I’ve always approached pacing is to fret about it in the planning stage. Once I start writing, I’m very character-focused, so my main concern is keeping everybody as in-character and “realistic” as possible, since I usually already have an outline with all the plot/emotional beats in place (written or up in my head). But pacing does come up at times even when I have most of the story planned, and I think the biggest indicator of a pacing issue is when you get stuck while writing.

Getting stuck isn’t always about that narrative flow — there are hundreds of reasons why I get writer’s block — but I have found that sometimes it’s because I’m writing something that’s disrupting the flow. Sometimes it’s a dialogue scene that runs too long, and characters are saying/explaining things that I could just show or summarize in a descriptive paragraph. Sometimes it’s a scene that’s totally redundant, period, and I scrap it entirely. 

In other words, skipping ahead and getting to the meat is totally valid on occasion ;D 

As for the space cowboys … *throws hands in the air* … Here’s a look as to how that mess got organized into a semi-coherent flow of words — massive, likely incoherent ramble under the cut!

First off: a one-story example — The Six-Gun Sound.

That story has the most basic pacing ever. Action scene at the start, exposition/dialogue scene right after that sets up the main plot/motive for the characters, followed by a steady build that goes right into that heist. The heist then slowly builds until BAM. Everything goes wrong, there are literal explosions, and then a climax of both the main plot-line and the emotional plot-line. (There is pacing set for both of those when I plan, usually. The plot informs the emotional beats and vice versa, depending on which is more important at any given time.)

In shorter words: action, calm, build-up to more action, big action, calm, and then the resolution. That kind of “ebb and flow” is basically how most stories work, I believe. If you have that going on in your tales, then I think you’re golden :D

I totally break those rules in many of my other tales, but, yeah. There it is ;)

Now, secondly: the entire Trouble’s Making Everything All Right series.

That is just … well, a giant mess, but it’s one that I find works for me? I might be confusing pacing with other parts of narrative structure, but overall, there’s a certain ebb and flow that leads to the first huge climax (which I believe is Short Change Heroes). Um, I’m going to try and explain and hope that it helps you?

Trouble Coming is essentially my expositional story (though I initially had no idea how long this series would go). If, for example, in your own writing you feel like “skipping” all that establishing information, well, I’m gonna be horrible and give you that old cliché — show and don’t tell (much).

I still had to explain some stuff in that story, but having no Team Voltron, having Lance and Keith sitting around that poker table, cheating at cards (Keith), and flirting as a distraction (Lance), while being tough as nails, pretty much establishes that something not good has happened. Especially as Keith worries about making ends meet.

Following that, the attack afterwards, which they treat as business as usual, barely blinking at the deaths they cause … Again, I don’t think I needed to tell you guys that they had been through some bad stuff. And they were continuing to go through some bad stuff. I don’t actually explain much until more than halfway through the story, when they’re back at the inn and there’s a moment of calm. (Again, I’m not great at pacing, but I tried to put a bit of ebb and flow in this series as a whole.) (Action at the beginning, sort of, and then calm.)

Six Gun Sound is pretty much all action, and it retroactively explains partially how Lance and Keith came to be the way they are (and how they got together ;D), and since you’ve already seen how jaded and broken they are in Trouble Coming, I like to think it makes for a sharper, harsher contrast to see them more … good just as they cross that line into becoming The Two McClains. (Lots of action/emotional conflict.)

Following that action-filled, emotional story, we’ve got Broken Bone World, which jumps forward to the more jaded Lance and Keith, but this time, we get to see them relax and perfectly in love with each other — and generally more settled in their new mercenary existence. (More calm.)

And then, Shuffling Madness, back in the past, is lots of action, lots of suffering — I hoped that seeing them as Paladins after three stories as space cowboys would be quite impactful in hindsight? Basically, seeing them being so optimistic about their chances makes you wince on their behalf because you, as the reader, already know how they end up. (Plenty of action/emotional turmoil.)

This is the point where the series is actually building towards the main climax. I had hinted at Keegin Dras going all the way back to the first story. But Paradise City is where the tension, um, kicks up, I guess (some of y’all may remember that cliffhanger? Er, sorry?) (Build-up to lots of action with a sudden stop and cliffhanger.)

I really like contrast, so this is my own personal opinion/writing style, but, um, yeah, there you go.

Edit: Damn, I totally forgot to mention Heaven Above You, which was probably one of my favourites to write — it prolongs the tension between Paradise City and Short Change Heroes, but also, while it isn’t too heavy on the action, I think of it is as still tension building because it shows that defining moment when Lance chose to take a life that wasn’t a direct threat to him. It’s an almost purely expositional story, but it sets up the emotional conflict of Short Change Heroes, while Paradise City sets up the main plot conflict?(Bit of action, mostly calm, but lots of emotional turmoil.)

Short Change Heroes is a damn disaster, but it’s a disaster I kinda really loved writing. There are just so many conversations. It really shouldn’t have had that many dialogue scenes. Holy crap, that war council is a story in and of itself, and I am definitely not Tolkien, holy crap, no. 

But, um, here’s where I contradict myself and say — I didn’t care about pacing, I just wanted to get these people (Team Voltron + The Two McClains) actually talking because communication rocks, and they absolutely would’ve wanted to talk a ton after a year apart. 

I did try and chop up some of the dialogue/exposition with a few action-type scenes (the interrogation scene, then that gang ambush, and that brief attack during the war council), but those scenes were also key to the plot-line and the emotional stuff. I was focused on pacing when I chose where to place those scenes, so that things would feel balanced and move forward smoothly. 

So, if in your own writing, you feel like you want to skip ahead, but you also feel like whatever information you need to impart (or interaction these characters need to have) is important to the plot/pacing (e.g. you need a quiet moment before battle or you need to show off an action scene before you can get to that juicy emotional resolution), find a way to make it fun for you to tell! I am a sucker for gritty honesty or sappy confessions or no-holds-barred arguing, so that’s how I handle some exposition. I love creating angsty situations instead of just explaining that someone’s had a bad time. 

Basically, in summation: I try to keep action and moments of stillness somewhat balanced. 

— A huge burst of action demands a longer moment of quiet/reflection, or a longer emotional conversation and/or resolution afterwards. 

— A massive emotional fight/discussion demands that the characters either have time apart or some kind of quiet/temporary peace after (even if the fight isn’t resolved right away or the discussion hasn’t unloaded everything in their heads). 

This is my preferred rhythm to story-telling, both on small (one story) or large (series) scales. This way a story doesn’t feel too stilted, or overly long (too many quiet moments?), or like it isn’t letting up/allowing the reader to settle (too many action moments?) — an even rhythm/flow carries the reader along easily (hopefully). 

I break these rules of mine often, but this is a general rant ;D

I really, really hope this has helped you, that this hasn’t bored you to death, and that I haven’t been totally nonsensical. I am honestly not even sure I answered this question at this point — it kinda just turned into a freakishly long ramble. *sweats* Sorry! 

You are very kind to ask, and I am so grateful to you! Best of luck with the writing, dear! *all the hugs*

[spellboundinks]

hello! anon here who asked about beginnings. err, the thing is, i'm confused whether describing the setting would be my appropriate beginning to this story i'm writing or writing as closest to the “action”/trigger is more appropriate. with the former, i feel like i could establish the mood/set the tone but with the latter, i feel like it's more attention-grabbing and the readers won't have to sludge through a ton of exposition. but yeah. do you have any tips on choosing which one maybe? 😅

Alright. So normally I would send links on how to start beginnings but you seem to understand how, you’re just grappling between two methods. So let’s look at the arguments for both sides.

Setting

If your setting is drastically different from the world we live in now, or somewhere on earth that wouldn’t necessarily be familiar for your target audience, I can see how it would be helpful to introduce the settings first. Settings aren’t necessarily boring, but you would have to pay attention and keep to specifics and need-to-know facts. Readers wouldn’t need to know everything right from the beginning, only the most important aspects of the world that tie into the beginning scene. It also would need to set the tone/time/place. This is why ‘a dark and stormy night’ is such an infamous (now horribly cliched) line. It gives a sense of place.

Advantages: introduces audience to the new world, avoiding confusion; helps establish tone/mood; gives important information and context for readers.

Disadvantages: can become an info dump if not handled well; may not bring readers into the story if the described world doesn’t catch their attention.

Examples of books that begin this way: 

Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone by J.K. Rowling - This is setting if I ever did read it holy crap. It goes on and on about Privet Drive and the family isn’t doing anything but daily activities and it’s not like you’re thrown into their day to day activities but its described as if they’re just part of the setting. That this is just what the neighbourhood is like. And is it a horrible way to start a story? Maybe to some people but wow JK Rowling can make something so mundane as the Dursleys’ interesting so who’s to say your fantasy or realistic setting can’t be an interesting place to start also!

The Name of the Wind by Patrick Rothfuss (MY FAVOURITE EXAMPLE OF THIS) - He goes on for basically a full chapter I think describing a bar and silence. SILENCE. His prose is beautiful and he literally describes three different silences in the bar without introducing characters or conflict really and it is hauntingly beautiful and still captures readers interest. 

I Am Number Four by Pittacus Lore - Describes what happened to the others and provides important and interesting context.

Action

It is great to consider a beginning in media res (in the midst of things). Action is a great way to get the reader invested and to introduce the main conflict or characters. It literally drops the reader into your story and provides them with little but their own wits to sort things out for themselves.

Advantages: starts the action right away and therefore, presumably speaking, the action; can introduce conflict and characters fast and effectively

Disadvantages: may leave out important context that readers need if not handled well; could be incredibly confusing.

Examples of books that begin this way: 

The Summoning by Kelley Armstrong - This immediately starts with a prologue with a child and a basement and a babysitter. It throws you into the narrative of this chubby little girl in scooby doo slippers terrified of the basement, her babysitter calling her. And it is super effective for a supernatural novel.

The Maze Runner by James Dashner - This starts immediately with Thomas on his way to the Glade. Which makes perfect sense for a protagonist who doesn’t remember his life previously at all. 

Alternative: NEITHER/BOTH

You do not have to start with setting or action but some weird combination of the two. You don’t have to start at the height of the action, maybe at or just before the inciting incident. And as you’re writing this scene you can drop in clues that set the scene and show how this world differs from our own. Whether it’s some fantastical setting like an elven city or something from our world that would just differ from the reader’s bedroom. 

Advantages: introduces everything in a balanced fashion.

Disadvantages: like anything, if poorly written it can become boring; requires a balance of focus (setting and action). 

Examples of books that begin this way: 

Cinder by Marissa Meyer - It begins in her her market stall right away, the screw in her ankle gives away that she is not fully human. As her market stall is described, so is its place in futuristic China. It introduces both setting, and falls into the action of Cinder’s daily mechanic duties. 

Percy Jackson and the Olympians: The Lightning Thief by Rick Riordan - He does not start with setting or throw you into the middle of things but immediately explains character and then the chapter is an even focus between the New York/Field Trip setting and greek mythology themes. 

Conclusion

Any method is the right method if you think it works well for your story. You will likely have to play around a bit to see what fits your setting, story and characters. Think what the reader needs to know immediately, that might help.

It will help if you look at the beginning of books in the genre you’re writing, as different beginnings are often popular in different genres. For instance, the setting approach is very common in fantasy. Reading other books will give you insight and inspiration.

Ava Jae is a new author with a Goodreads account with a blog on there and what she does every month I think is a first page contest where writers like you can enter your first page and she’ll essentially mark it for you and give you tips on what works and what doesn’t if you’re selected.

I hope this helps you with your writing!!! 

[pangtasias-atelier]

Is the cash cow known as 3 Hou/ses dead yet? Hasn’t it been milked enough? Honestly; I like warriors games but, I’m definitely not gonna play a 3/H centric game. Real sick of it. I hope they don’t pull this shit with the next F/E game.

I hope you feel better about your writing and what you write. (Sorry I’m not that great with words, but I hope you feel better!)

I honestly, genuinely, earnestly believe that while 3/h was milked quite a bit, I$ could definitely have done much more. Like I will say i was tired as hell of it in f/e)h but they like mostly resorted to seasonals instead of taking up new banner slots. Though that alone is just an issue with new banners being every other banner so games getting new heroes added takes a fucking year+ which is ridiculous. But yeah, FEH being basically taken over by 3/H has been absolutely atrocious. Especially when if you combine 3/H and FEH OCs for seasonals, those two games alone take up mote than half of the combined seasonal units for 2021 which 🙃

As for 3H warriors, I like kinda enjoy warrior games but I at least hope this is the case for only the spinoffs, but the lack of any real difficulty to the games makes them just a lil bit too repetitive for me. Like I played a metric ton of Hyrule warriors and i enjoyed it but by the time of this 4th warriors game I'm just a lil done with it. Even if it's not a basic crossover so actual story can happen but the so far plausible story makes me mad.

Cause like, having played age of calamity, I fucking hated the whole basic golden route narrative that they tried cause it literally defeats all narrative purpose and emotional portions from botw. All for the sake of getting people to pay for golden ending that they know people wanted. And I know, I KNOW, that the same shit is gonna happen with 3H warriors which is gonna be even more frustrating and irritating cause it basically looks at the whole point of 3H being that some stuff is unavoidable and that choices matter. Which is already a point that is admittedly pretty half-assed in 3H considering you're only real major choice is that the fucking beginning of the game without you knowing like anything which is just stupid. At least fates gave you the dignity to get to know the people somewhat before making you choose.

I just pray that the next fe game does end up being a genealogy game that has been hinted by leakers but who even knows cause information is never 100% correct but i wish 🥺. I also wish they don't fucking go the route of echoes and FE1/3 where they just copy paste map design cause holy fuck was echoes maps awful keeping the shit from gaiden. At least fe11/12 had much better maps from Archanea but there were still some rough designs that were just fully kept. Especially cause being on chapter 5 of genealogy, holy crap are the maps in fe4 absolutely way worse than I remembered ahsvsjsbs.

And that was super long lmao but have been pretty meh. Also ty,,, have been burned out on writing and stuff in general but added another 2k words to story so now at 4k and near the end 🥳. So expect something tomorrow probably lol

[mydearburkhart]

I haven't been able to read as much fanfics as I'd like, but here are some of my guilty pleasure t7s tropes:

when jackie moves on

now, this one might not be everyone's favorite but it's mine and I'm totally chill about it. seriously, I'm a hard-core zennie, but I love post s8 stories where jackie moves on with someone else (especially when jh aren't endgame). even though there are great post s8 fics where they get back together that I love, reading a story where she finds someone and is genuinely happy is so satisfying to me as a jackie stan. that includes those stories where she makes new friends as well.

time travel aus

this one works for any fandom basically, but I love those scenarios where hyde or jackie have a chance to go back in time to fix their mistakes. although there are very few of those (somebody please write some more) my fav is one where jackie was dead and hyde couldn't stop hugging her when he got back in time.

jackie leaves point place

I know, 8 out of 10 during or post s8 follow the same background. but damn it, I love it.

fake dating!jeric

I have to admit that I have a soft spot for jeric. but fake dating jeric trying to get under donna and hyde's skin? IT'S FUCKING EVERYTHING! I just love it.

I also wanted to include some tropes that I don't like (or that I used to like but don't anymore):

hyde deserves forgiveness, donna doesn't

"I expected from him, not from you."

"hyde was hurt, but donna was just being a backstabbing bitch."

I don't care, I hate it. don't get me wrong, I'm far from being donna's biggest fan. but if she's getting backlash, he should get twice as much.

donna might have befriended sam, but hyde married her. donna might have been a bad friend to jackie, but the way hyde mistreated her was cruel.

as soon as I finished the show, I read tons of stories that villanized donna and I enjoyed them because they fulfilled my own issues with her actions (especially post-California). but, as I got more involved with the fandom, I realized that I was doing to donna the same thing the writers did to jackie. villanizing a girl for being and acting like a teenager.

while the producers demonized jackie for being a girly teen (like most late 90s/early 2000s productions), I did the same to donna for acting like a teenager. she fucked up, like every 17 year old would.

I hate it when the story makes it seem like hyde's actions are forgivable, but donna's aren't. if you want to go down that road remember it goes both ways. it's giving me misogyny.

jackie has an abusive boyfriend

now, writing abusive relationships can make an interesting story, as long as it's done properly. it can even help some readers deal with real life situations.

now, if a writer gives jackie a clearly abusive, not subtle at all boyfriend just to make hyde's actions pale in comparison, I'm not reading it.

it's literally like, "oh, he married another woman and humiliated jackie, but at least he didn't hit her."

acting like the gang and jackie's age gap is much bigger than it actually is

unless it's an au where they are much more older than her, it won't work.

I know a lot of this is because mila is 6-8 years younger than the rest of the cast. but some stories will portray jackie as young, dumb and immature, and yet will make other characters act like full grown, mature adults, even though they're teens.

she's just one year younger, like????

passive!jackie and possessive!hyde

jealousy is a valid emotion and, when written in a healthy and responsible way, can be part of a good story. but when it comes to possessiveness I'm not getting into it. I used to like possessive!hyde, until I didn't. just not my vibe anymore.

and jackie is not a passive person. that's simply out of character in my perception. like, he's gonna act like the asshole he can be and she's just gonna sit there and take his crap? oh, hell no. it's not giving.

thanks for the tag @that-basket-case hun! 🥰 I missed interacting here 💖

So last week, I read all of

TheQueensBrokenHeart works

and I really, thoroughly enjoyed all of them. I cannot recommend enough that you go and read their stories, they're all very amazing.

From my reading, I discovered a new guilty pleasure trope centered around T7S, specifically the fanfictionverse. This made me wonder, what are some of yours guilty pleasure trope from T7S stories? Actually you can mention other fandoms to, I don't mind, just clarify it so I won't get confused though lol.

For me,

That 70s Show Fanfictionverse Guilty Pleasure Tropes:

Demonized Kelso/Villainous Kelso/ Irredeemable Kelso/ Totured or Punished Kelso/ any arc where Kelso's inappropriate behaviour is NOT being enabled or accepted as him "just being Kelso". [As you can probably tell, Kelso is my least favourite character mainly because of his entitlement behaviour and lack of growth apart from season 6. The showrunners would never give him growth which is sad, he could've been a better man if they've just didn't given up on him in season 7.]

Long-distanced/Non-existent relationship between Hyde and Red+Kitty, especially with Kitty. [Mainly because I think Kitty enabled a lot of Hyde's questionable behaviour in season 7 and other seasons here and there. I know it's the writings fault but I digress]

Dead Jack and/or Pam Burkhart.

Same as number one, but with Pam Burkhart and slightly tamer undertone with Jack Burkhart. [3 & 4 seems self-explanatory but I can further explain if anyone's interested]

There's probably more but I can't seem think of all of them now, maybe I'll update once it comes back to me. Tagging

@crimsinsky @thestupidhelmet @einsteinsugly @springsteenicious @queenbookbuff @zeppelin-and-unicorns @glittermila @snookstheallmighty @scaponigifs @mydearburkhart @kim1918 @that70sshowgoldencouple

and anyone who's interested. The more the merrier! 😁