#barbaric and murderous as we’re portrayed…. That violent

[cyarskaren52]

Fixed It: Lying-ass biiiitch named Carolyn Bryant Donham, the white woman who never punished for causing the kidnap, torture, and murder of 14-year-old Emmett Till, is dead .

[cyarskj1899]

You lynched 14 yr old Emmit Till. I hope your burn for an eternity!

Your arsss is gonna be like bacon extra crispy

[thelastofgala]

Here are some more of my thoughts on Parallelism in The Last of Us 2. I’m also thinking about Ellie and Joel in their “Nightmare Years,” and how the writers are using symbols, parallels, and the game’s promotional trailers to fuck with our emotions:

***Major Spoilers And a discussion of Grief Under the Cut***

My personal observation of Joel’s death in TLoU2 is that it was always going to happen, and that its occurrence so soon in the story, while shocking, was necessary and even predictable, based on the plot of the previous game, and obvious parallels between Joel and Ellie. Note that I’ve now played through the Hillcrest chapter and the second flashback with Joel and Ellie at the hotel. I’m currently in the fucking sewer system, and there are Stalkers like, everywhere.

Ellie and Joel: Parallels

In my last post, I wrote about Joel’s parallels mostly with Riley (and I have more on that, for a different post) but I also wrote about Joel’s parallels with Sarah, mainly that we begin TLoU2 with Joel, setting up certain expectations right away, ie: both Joel and Sarah meet tragic fates early on in the story propelling their heroes past the threshold and into their respective journeys. But Ellie and Joel, as protagonists, are the most compelling parallel of the game, to me.

Learning of Joel’s violent past as a hunter and seeing his life as a violent, amoral smuggler is much easier to understand once, via Ellie, we get a taste of the anger he must have felt after a member of the US Military shot and killed Sarah in front of him. The senselessness of Sarah’s death, our feel of betrayal and surprise from Joel’s point of view are then echoed in Joel’s own death scene in TLoU2, which we witness helplessly from Ellie’s point of view. A long time ago, I made a post wondering whether Ellie’s journey in TLoU2 would echo Joel’s off-screen journey in the years immediately following the Outbreak--what Tommy inadvertently refers to in TLoU as a “nightmare.” Sort of like the Abyss stage in the Hero’s Journey, it is in these nightmare trials that all hope seems lost, and we are at the lowest possible point of the story. I am definitely sticking with this interpretation after playing through a pretty big chunk of TLoU2.

The one major difference between how Ellie and Joel’s journeys are being portrayed in their respective stories is where their stories start: Joel’s journey picks up 20 years after Sarah’s death. He is through the Abyss, on the upswing, his path to clarity and renewal. With Ellie, however, the story starts in the descent. We, the player, are inside the nightmare that, with Joel, we only got to hear about, and even then, it’s all incredibly vague.

We don’t get to see Joel in his “nightmare years” with Tommy. We don’t get to know all the bad things he did and all of the hard choices he made in order to survive after Sarah’s death and up until the point that we meet him 20 years later in TLoU. We get hints from Tess, from Tommy, and stuff implied via Joel’s know-how, his obviously violent transformation from jokey single dad in the rural suburbs of Austin to dangerous smuggler in the Boston QZ. Instead of learning about Joel’s life in the years following Sarah’s death, we seem to be playing through them, metaphorically, as Ellie in the years immediately following his. Just a current observation on how the story is unfolding, to me.

Gameplay Empathy w/ Ellie

Starting with Joel’s death scene: I first noticed how the writers are using gameplay and point of view to fuck with our emotions while watching Joel’s actual death. I remember feeling, not grief, but intense, white hot anger. How did this work? In a couple ways, I thought. Having us play as Abby prior to the scene turns out to set up a totally personal sense of betrayal for the player. We previously fight from her point of view, relentlessly ensuring her survival in earlier scenes, only to then watch her murder Joel, with no way to intervene. Our sense of betrayal is compounded of course by the fact that we love Ellie, and Ellie loves Joel, and the way that Abby kills Joel, with a golf club in the basement of a lavish ski house in Jackson Hole, is somehow both barbaric and maddeningly mundane. For all of this, I felt, with Ellie, blind hatred and anger. I didn’t feel any actual grief over Joel’s death until visiting his house, and even then, I couldn’t even really acknowledge it until the first flashback at the science museum--hearing his voice again was what specifically did me in. In the moment of his death, I just kept thinking that it was bullshit, it wasn’t fair. He deserved a better death, right? There are no good deaths, I’d argue intellectually in the aftermath. But in the moment, I was fucking enraged.

This sense of simulated motivation and empathy for the player is really interesting to me. It feels linked hopelessly to the medium. In a movie, we need only to sympathize with our protagonist. We are vicarious voyeurs. But in a video game, we are willing and active participants, and empathy is more important. While playing Ellie on her relentless hunt through WLF-occupied Seattle, the player, like her, must be motivated by anger and revenge. 

I am continuously intrigued by how the game is manipulating my emotions so that I may be placed in maximum empathy with Ellie at any given moment. Use of visual and story symbols like the guitar are mini-triggers which call Joel to mind at unexpected turns. We will be steadily solving puzzles, distracted into a lull by collecting supplies in a vast and beautiful environment, and then, boom: the guitar, and the song. If I ever were to lose you... It’s like an anchor to the truth. 

The trailers have also, I’ve found, been a major source of grief and disappointment for me, placing me firmly within Ellie’s constant cycle of denial and realization as we go. For example, in the release date trailer, during a pivotal moment, it is Joel who places his hand over Ellie’s mouth, and it is Joel who says, “You think I’d let you do this on your own?” So when this happens in game, during the Hillcrest escape, its a huge moment. The player is filled with anticipation and excitement. We are going to see Joel. Regardless of whether it is real or not, we are going to see him. 

But at this point in the story, it’s not Joel. In game, in real time, it’s Jesse. They’re fucking with us. It’s like we’re living inside of Ellie’s delusion, her grief and her fantasy. That Joel would be there at the last moment to save her life, as he did so many times in TLoU. As he did in the hotel outside of Jackson, with the Bloater who had her pinned to the floor. It’s not Joel, it’s Jesse. The disappointment is crushing, but the truth makes sense. It’s so obvious. Of course it’s Jesse. We’re just reliving the past, with Ellie. Over and over again, and we can’t escape. This game is turning out to be a very interesting mediation on grief, and how it follows us, how it can even change and mold our perception of reality. 

These are my latest takes on TLoU2. As usual, they’re just personal observations and points of view, not meant to change anyone’s mind. I’m not finished with the game, so please no spoilers or spoilery comments in the replies. Thank you! ^_^ -gala

[morbidology]

Top 10 True Crime Podcast Episodes for June

We hope you are ready for some shocking, strange, and unsolved true crime podcasts! We’re back with some terrifying episode recommendations curated by me, the station manager of True Crime Radio!

Enjoy and be sure to listen daily to True Crime Radio to discover your new favourite true crime podcasts.

True Crime Brewery – Surviving Ted Bundy:

Life in the Aftermath of Serial Killer Ted Bundy. Rhonda Stapley was a student at the University of Utah. At 21-years-old, Rhonda was innocent. She grew up as a good Mormon girl. When Rhonda met Ted Bundy, she believed the image he portrayed: a fellow student, attractive, helpful and safe. When the mask of Ted was lifted, she would experience first hand the terror and agony he unleashed on his victims. In this episode of True Crime Brewery, we discuss the life and crimes of Theodore Robert Bundy as we learn about his victims and a survivor whose life was forever changed by what he did to her.

The Trail Went Cold – Episode 35 – Cindy Anderson:

August 4, 1981. Toledo, Ohio. 20-year old Cindy Anderson shows up for her job as a legal secretary at a law firm. Later that morning, Cindy’s co-workers arrive at the locked office and are surprised to discover that she has vanished. A romance novel is lying on Cindy’s desk and is open to a page describing a scene where a woman is abducted. This would only be one of many bizarre clues in a missing persons case which includes some haunting graffiti, a pair of chilling anonymous phone calls describing Cindy’s abduction, and a drug trafficking ring involving one of the lawyers at the firm. This week’s episode chronicles the baffling unsolved disappearance of Cindy Anderson.

My Favorite Murder – 72 – Steven It Out:

This week, Karen and Georgia cover Larry Eyler aka The Highway Killer and The Pillow Pyro of Southern California, John Orr.

True Crime All the Time – Ep31 – Dorothea Puente “The Death House Landlady”:

In the 1980s, Dorothea Puente ran a boarding house for tenants many of whom were elderly or mentally disabled. On the outside, it appeared that Puente was providing a much-needed service to individuals that may have had nowhere else to turn. But in reality, she was murdering these individuals so that she could profit from their benefit checks long after they were dead. Join Mike and Gibby as they wade through the twists and turns of this fascinating case of Puente who become known as the “Death House Landlady”. Puente may have appeared as a loving grandmother to many, but her lust for money turned her into a grisly mass murderer.

Beyond the Blood – EP10 – A Murder in Summerfield:

A teen love triangle and bitter Facebook feud culminated in the savage killing of a 15-year-old Florida boy who was lured to his death by his former girlfriend.

The Generation Why Podcast – The Beltway Snipers – 236:

The Beltway Snipers. Washington, D.C. October, 2002. Fear grips the beltway as random people are shot dead in public by a hidden shooter. Parking lots and gas stations were no longer safe. A single gunshot would be heard and then someone would fall. Five were shot dead on October 3rd alone. Men, women, and even kids were targets for whoever was behind the attacks. For more than 20 days, the attacks and even taunts from the killer continued until a call alerted authorities to the location of the two responsible for the crimes. But the Beltway attacks were not the whole story. John Allen Muhammad and his teenage co-conspirator Lee Boyd Malvo wanted to terrorize the public and bring the system down.

They Walk Among Us – Season 1 – Episode 17:

In 2004, Sydney Blackwell, a retired accountant, and his wife Jacqueline, an antiques dealer, lived in the village of Melling in Merseyside. It’s an affluent area with green fields, old churches, and quaint cottages. They shared their home with their 18-year-old son, Brian. As Sydney sat in his favorite chair, his son attacked him with a claw hammer and then proceeded to stab his mother 15 times.

Misconduct – Ep23 – The Disappearance of Sheila Fox:

Sheila Fox was six years old when she disappeared on her way home from school in 1944 in Bolton, Lancashire, England. She was seen leaving the school but never made it home. Conflicting eyewitness accounts were given to investigators, but Sheila was never seen or heard from again. The case remained cold for 57 years. Then in 2001, the investigation became active again because law enforcement received a new tip. This was the first credible tip they had received in over half a century. Unfortunately, the tip went nowhere, but questions arose about other incidents in the area. Was Sheila an isolated incident? Or was there a serial offender responsible for multiple attacks in the area?

Canadian True Crime – 07 – The Murder of Tim Bosma:

In 2013, a 32-year-old family man took two potential buyers for a test drive in the truck he was selling. He never returned from that test drive. What happened? Was it about the man or the truck? This is a heinous, senseless murder that shocked the nation and still continues to do so.

True Crime Guys – Carl Panzram:

In 1928, while in jail awaiting trial for robbery and murder, Carl Panzram wrote a 20,000 word summary of his life, up to that point. His writings portray a life of abuse, imprisonment, and his own violent crimes against humanity. How much of his story was true? Was he the product of barbaric reform schools, jails, and prisons? We tell his story and give our take on it.

Listen to all of these podcasts and more on True Crime Radio

[nicemango-feed]

Thoughts on Manchester Attack....& Responses that Just aren't Helping

The Manchester terror attack broke my heart, as each and every terror attack does. It chilled me to my core…again. 

Image from CNN.com

With the frequency of these attacks, it’s hard to process them all and properly mourn the loss before your attention is diverted to yet another tragedy. 

During the time I finished up this very blog post, I heard of deadly attacks in Baghdad and Kabul. It's hard, so hard to take it all in and grasp the magnitude of loss around the world. 

My thoughts are with all those who have suffered. 

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The Manchester attack targeted children while they were out having fun, enjoying music, enjoying life... 

Image from here

It’s those very freedoms that terrorists hate, they abhor those who don’t live in the same ideological cages as them. 

I sit here and try to absorb all the fragmented commentary coming from all angles, trying to make sense of this, trying to understand how we can change it for the better. How do we stop this from happening? I don’t know.. because the terrorists motivations seem to lie in a tangled web of things, parts of which each side wants to deny. The most obvious of those is extreme blind faith in an ideology they consider to be infallible.  

I look around me, and see there’s nothing new here…

The left though well intentioned, nor the right, theists, nor atheists - no one is hitting notes (on this subject) that deeply resonate with me anymore. It’s pretty much the same tired commentary, the same motions we go through after each terror attack. 

“Islam is evil”

“”Nothing to do with Islam”

“Muslims must do more” 

“Muslims should not have to apologize for something they have nothing to do with” 

“Islam is war”

“Islam is peace” 

“Its all about foreign policy”

“Its all about religion” 

We really have to do better than this, because neither side on this issue is getting through to the other. Just screaming at each other till we’re blue in the face isn’t going to accomplish anything. 

It’s obvious this is a problem that needs to be addressed, denying links to Islam as people shout Allahu-akbar and take lives just doesn't suffice. It’s not helping anyone, least of all muslims. 

This isn’t to say that how all muslims practice Islam is hateful, divisive and dangerous...but we must acknowledge that some extreme muslims do take it this far, if we want to start solving this. Of course every community has it’s extremists..but Islam does have a lot more Westboro Baptist equivalents …and too many who are even more extreme than Westboro level.

There is a fundamentalism problem coming directly from the rigid orthodoxy that Islam commands in the 21st century. Our communities can certainly do more to promote diversity and inclusivity…we do fall short there, we’ve got to own it…only then can we begin to tackle it.

All that said though, here’s another thing thats not cutting it; Laying the blame on all Muslims collectively. 

This is like me saying portland, Quebec, NYC - white supremacist murders all by you white people. Its just not right to lump innocent people of the same demographic with violent savages who murder people. 

In this case in particular, it’s not fair to say Muslims could have, or should have done more as a community…as the bomber, Salman Abedi had been reported to authorities multiple times. There are mixed reports about him being banned from his mosque, so I'm not sure about that. But mosques can always do more to try and root out extremism. 

Full story here

With a frightening surge in white supremacist and anti-muslim attacks in this Trumpian era, the polarization amongst us is growing at such an alarming rate...I fear we’ll end up at a point where we have to pick a side between nazis and jihadis. Already people seem to think you can’t care about both…each team trying to emphasize the horrors of ‘the other side’ while trying to downplay or deny the horrors that come from people within their communities. 

Full story here

Full story here

We’ve got to do better, all of us. Looking inwards, is important for all communities, self-critique is how we improve.

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The post terror attack scenario, is sadly our reality more and more often…around the globe. I understand its a moment of panic, anger, high emotion. People aren’t always thinking clearly on any side of the debate. But we have to do better, it’s the only way we can beat this monster. The one thing they want is to divide, disrupt and create chaos, sow hatred... in the days, weeks, months after…it’s something we should not let them have. 

There are a lot different types of counterproductive behaviour that emerge right after a terror attack, I feel we can make an already horrendous, painful situation a little more bearable if we refrain from this type of behaviour: 

'The Nothing to do with Islam’ chorus - I get it, it’s a reflex to distance either yourself (if you’re muslim) or an already persecuted minority from the worst, most violent people among them. But as all the liberal/muslim defenders of the religion will tell you, Islam is not a monolith. There are many people, majority of muslims in fact who manage to ignore or ‘re-interpret’ the same verses that drive the terrorists to kill. Why then does it all of a sudden become a monolith with boundaries that exclude terrorists when convenient? You simply cannot deny that those verses too come from the same religion. Just a different interpretation…if you start defining ISIS as ‘not real muslims’ you are playing their game. This is essentially what they do to dehumanize muslims that aren’t living up to their barbaric 7th century standards. The defensiveness and the desperation to distance terrorists from the religion that they themselves claim inspires them, makes defenders appear intellectually dishonest or in deep denial. In order to see the whole picture we cannot keep hiding from the fact that religion has a major role to play in religious extremism. There is hatred of music, hatred of women, of LGBT, of non-muslims coming from Islamic scripture, and theres no way you can modernize, reform or improve things if you at the very least don’t acknowledge that this problem exists. Fine…say this is not how you read it, but you can’t deny that the raw material exists for others to interpret in more violent ways. 

Sharing selective out of context Quran quotes guy - Nope. If you think you can share selective positive quotes, then don’t forget that people can and will rightfully share selective violent quotes to counter that too. This just looks like dishonesty or incomplete knowledge (which is also an issue, as many muslims are taught a curated version of scripture and often in a language they don't understand, I honestly didn’t know the existence of some of these verses till I did some research on my own…and hence, ‘ex-muslim’... 

I’ll make the same point for those who randomly share selective violent Quran quotes in the aftermath of a terror attack…not as a rebuttal to anyone denying violence in scripture…but just putting it out there that ..’look the scripture is violent… this scripture ALL muslims live by is dangerous” - no, this isn’t the time or place for that. I wholeheartedly agree…the scripture is vile, violent and all that. But tying ordinary muslims to these violent words when they may not fully be aware of its meanings, or even know of its existence is just in poor taste when they will likely already face a backlash of anti-muslim sentiment after an Islamic terror attack. I would say at other times, absolutely share this stuff, make muslims aware that this is what it says, and ask them to question if they’d really endorse this stuff. But RIGHT after a terror attack? Not a good idea imo. The bible has some vile violent verses too…we’ve just reached a point where many people don’t take it literally, and I hope we get there for Islam too…but if thats the goal tying *muslims in general* to violent verses in ancient scripture post-terror attack is harmful and counterproductive. 

Reminder, for the 'but what about Islam' types, I'm not sharing this to deny or shift blame from the fact that the Quran has equally violent, abhorrent verses that do inspire such horrors. But just to demonstrate that it is not uniquely evil, it is just unique in how seriously it is still taken today by many...unfortunately. 

Being blindly narrative driven without any regard for the truth - whether on the left or right, all muslims bad or all muslims good. This can take the vicious Nazi-esque Katie Hopkins form (far more dangerous and sinister of course), or it can take a well-intentioned but dishonest form from a magazine trying to portray muslims in a good light. You might be well intentioned but if you knowingly lie about things (see Cosmo screenshots below), ultimately you’re doing more harm to Muslims than you are good, and also providing fodder to the far right…who will find it easier to dismiss positive stories about muslims because of things like this.  

So they seem to know it's a Sikh person at this point...

How then...does this dishonest headline get printed? I mean there might very well be muslim Taxi drivers doing this as well, but juxtaposing it with this picture of a Sikh man, is really misleading!

Jump to Islamophobia concerns community leader - usually a guy being interviewed on TV who actually barely says two words about the horror of this attack before turning it around and making it about him and his community. Come on dude, priorities…yes there will likely be an anti-muslim backlash…i feel you…I get your concerns, I think anyone of muslim background shares those…generally people with brown skin might be fearful, as some non muslims have been killed as well in anti-muslim attacks. So i get it, legitimate concern….but in the aftermath of an attack, the first thing on your mind shouldn’t be the impact this will have on you…have some sympathy for the victims, for the horror their families will be dealing with.  

Similarly, on the fliplside theres the 'You can only care about one thing at a time' person - To this individual if you are concerned about a woman’s hijab being violently ripped off at the same time as the attack, you clearly have no regard for the victims of this brutal attack. This seems absurd to me. You can simultaneously express concern for both…because both harm innocent people. To assume there is no real violence being committed against perceived muslims is deeply foolish or deeply sinister…this isn’t about a few mean words hurled at muslims. This is about pregnant women being kicked till they lose their babies, this is about innocent people being killed. Their lives are no less valuable than those who went to the concert. You can and should express concern about both, of course one of these is not a large scale terrorist attack so one is more pressing and urgent, but this doesn’t mean that anyone expressing concern for both cares any less about the victims of the actual bombing. It just means they are looking at the bigger picture and concerned both about longer term as well as immediate effects. Sad this has to be explained, but there are many 'skeptical takes' out this week saying the victims of the bombing take a backseat if u care about anti-muslim sentiment rising during this attack. Its not one or the other, this is tribalism, plain and simple. And until we stop making it about us vs. them…and see that it is a cyclical problem where hate feeds hate...and that far right anti-muslim hate also fans the fires of Islamism, we won’t be able to combat it. 

The niqabi who decides to wear a grenade t-shirt on TV - ok this is rather specific…but i’m referring to a real fucking person who thought it was a good idea to be on TV and be interviewed about radicalization in the muslim community while wearing a black t-shirt that spells love in fucking *weapons*. 

At first i thought it was a photoshop job.. but sadly not...See video here

What kind of a person thinks thats a fucking good idea..? I mean of course Tommy Robinson was all over that. I don’t think it necessarily says anything about her sympathies or affiliations, as it appears to be a widely available 

t-shirt, 

but I mean the optics of this on a hipster kid and on a niqabi talking about extremism on TV after an *islamic* *terror* *attack* are completely different. Of course people are going to draw conclusions about what she was thinking. It might very well be that she foolishly thought it was a good ironic msg about peace, love and being anti violence or something…but fuck...it does not come across like that. Terrible terrible idea. NOT HELPING. 

'Hashtag Terror attack you say?!...Buy my books because I generally talk about Islam & stuff' person - 

Seriously...don’t be that person…don’t plug your non-specific stuff using a terror attack that took many lives. Of course some content is genuinely helpful and some content has been created as a specific response or commentary to this attack. That’s not what i’m talking about… it’s perfectly ok and also necessary for us to have access to different commentary and viewpoints after an attack. It’s how we process and form our opinions. This very piece is that… I’m talking about unrelated things that people are plugging using the hashtag and all. Don’t do that. That’s really in poor taste. 

Projecting negative intent on anyone that’s visibly muslim - Don’t be like Molyneux, probably a good rule in general.

(This is from the London attack, but the point remains.)

Whining about how people express their grief - Im sorry but people cope in different ways... are you that miserable of a person that you cannot let people heal in the ways that suit them? Coming together in groups, singing, feeling part of a community can feel powerful....and unite us at a time we feel so helpless otherwise. It can make us feel like we're doing something at least. Expressing ourselves through music and song is one of the things jihadis hate... its why they attack concert halls ffs. Don't be the guy that piles on to that. "Liberals just sing while the terrorists bomb us" - right cuz the singing is how they specifically plan to combat bombing. Liberals would go to battle ISIS armed with Jon Lennon songs I'm sure. 

I mean can people seriously have a problem with this kind of thing?

Goosebumps! The amazing moment Manchester crowd joins in with woman singing Oasis - Don't Look Back in Anger after minutes silence http://pic.twitter.com/Cw4mOq8yde

— Josh Halliday (@JoshHalliday) May 25, 2017

Is this not a valid & beautiful unifying, powerful response to human suffering? I don't understand the pettiness...

But What about [Name other Tragedy] - This isn't a contest, human suffering isn't a contest, please don't try to negate one tragedy by saying another deserves more attention. Yes some things get more air time than others, sometimes because it's closer to home, other times because of some aspects of the story. I wish i knew how to insure that all tragedies got equal attention, but this doesn't happen in the real world...so please don't take away from other horrific acts because the one you're talking about got less coverage. 

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I’m sure there’s a ton of more examples of unhelpful behaviour… feel free to add your observations too, in the comments below. But I just felt I had to put this out there after seeing so many cringeworthy takes, making an already tragic situation worse. 

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[cyarskaren52]

Smoking on that Carolyn Donham pack infront of her racist family and I don’t even smoke

https://twitter.com/chillin662/status/1651621782900580358?s=20

[cyarskj1899]

But the Biiiiitttch who lied got to live until she was old. She got to have a full life. I hope she really suffered in the end, and Emmit till haunted her in her last days!