#banan fish ending
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They won't stop pinging around my thoughts, so here are some headcanons for PH so I can keep writing tonight:
-All of the spirits have secondary powers that are separate, but related to, what they represent. The most "useful" of these is Neri- who can tell when someone is lying v telling the truth. Leaf can tell when someone is arrogant and power-hungry v a natural-born leader. Ciela can tell when someone is fearful. These powers are supposed to help them sus out bad people, or help someone become better- unfortunately, it just means they all hate Linebeck for one reason or another.
-The treasure that Linebeck stole from Jolene was the Regal Ring.
-Linebeck II had already been born by the time of PH- and is probably about 2 years old. Whether or not the Captain knows about him is debatable.
-Oshus is ABSOLUTELY the person that directed Linebeck to the Temple before the game starts.
-The earthquake at the beginning of the game- the one that causes the bridge to collapse- also caused the spike trap to go off in the Temple and trap Linebeck.
-Linebeck is native to The Ocean King's Seas.
-Termina, Lorule, and the Ocean King's Seas are all the same alternate reality. The event of the timeline splitting is a big enough deal to be felt across realities. That is the reason they're all so different, but still have reference to things like the Triforce.
-Linebeck absolutely helped find New Hyrule, Link visits him at his shop whenever he can.
-Oshus can shapeshift into many different sea creatures- he prefers the form of a whale because he thinks of them as noble and mighty. But when his power is limited, he can only really transform into a gull- this is how he ends up at Molida and the Ghost Ship. (He likes to say the form is an albatross, but everyone knows it's just a gull)
-When Oshus teleported the crew back to The Great Sea, he also left some directions on how to find the nearest mainland.
-Jolene and her sister were also sent to The Great Sea after the events of PH. They helped found the fishing village in ST.
-Jolene's crew was an all female crew- a lot of them left, a lot of them died trying to figure out about the Ghost Ship, some of them where able to settle down outside of piracy.
-The reason Jolene starts coming after you when she does is because her sister told her about Linebeck traveling around with a kid. (Most people visit Banan Island before you get the Spirit of Courage- if you complete the Wayfarer's side mission, you learn that the mermaid was staring at Linebeck before he caught on. I think she was trying to tell if it really was her sister's former lover, before sending a letter that basically said "You would NOT believe who I just saw")
I'll add more if I think of more, but I'll leave you with one more for shits and giggles.
-Homebrewed alcoholic milk is called "mooshine"
#phantom hourglass#legend of zelda phantom hourglass#headcanon#Some of these I take more seriously than the others#I can have a civil discussion about most of them#But others I do get a bit feral about#Not all of these are relevant to TBaBS but a lot are#I won't say which#Because that almost goes into spoiler territory
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BF ending pt2
Ending it this way is unnecessary the same way Ash's rape in ep 22 was. Max's good message from the previous ep gets undermined while Ash, who has been slowly healing is again getting abused by another completely one dimensional and useless villain. His character is subjected to an absurd amount of trauma and unbelievably set up to get into such situations repeatedly not for the sake of plot but I don't know...pointless sadism. Or as I speculated before to cement what is going to happen to him in the end. Everything is forgotten, Ash wins for a moment but in the next the whole process repeats. Cumulating constant horrifying events just for the sake of it isn't good writing and not just because it's upsetting, sometimes something else happens- the useless agony forced down our throats too much starts to not ring true, it's so excessively extra to the point that it loses the impact it should have. Ending suffers from the exact same flaw. I don't agree the ending is objectively good even if it's unhappy. The worst thing about it is that due to things I wrote about earlier ending becomes not believable, it becomes more like a cliche soap opera than grim real life like tragedy. In the context of the repeating unrealistic patterns of worse torment that nevertheless have Ash pull himself through like a superman each time the ending loses a feeling of finality and realism within the story. That's why I cannot connect with the popular narrative praising the ending for being near perfectly constructed, logical and realistic even though painful. I can't get behind the reception of it as some kind of edgy masterwork in which the huge part of its greatness lays in its overt grimness.
I think people misunderstand that those who don’t like the ending are against it only because it’s not happy, that we could only accept it if it was a ride into the sunset. The way Ash died was tawdry more than clever and it can’t be glossed over. It wasn’t the only right and the best way at all but there’s another missed opportunity here. The whole journey of Ash was about breaking out of the role he’s been given (going against Dino, refused to side with Foxx). The role of the victim and then the one of a monster. He wanted to do it, was cheered on by Eiji along the way. Plagued by doubts if he could but in any case actively working towards freeing himself. When fans often insist Ash can’t be anything but a murderer, can never even try to live normally, live any other way than as a killing machine destined to die it is sadly the same self-defeating thing Ash does, it’s what he’s been told by the villains who want him to be like that and opposite of what Eiji fights to tell him. The ending means crossing out all previous efforts of Ash trying to struggle against it and all support of Eiji’s, it means it was unsuccessful in the end. All that Eiji tried to tell him, how he is a person and deserves to be just that is being finally undermined. He didn’t free himself, he internalized the reductive, negative image and punished himself, didn’t die freed. Remember the time when Yut Lung tried to guilt trip and victim blame Eiji for being Ash’s destruction? He is told he will be the reason for Ash getting hurt and his eventual death and to leave Ash alone or better yet kill himself if he cares for Ash and doesn’t want for it to happen? Eiji calls out this bullshit and doesn’t listen. Eiji rebelled when he was told to distance himself from Ash for Ash’s sake, while Ash (and the audience) totally buys into this narrative that Ash is only an unnecessary danger in regards to Eiji and needs to be separated or die if he cares. Also in the same scene Eiji still doesn’t accept Ash can’t escape and should be who Yut Lung and Dino think he is supposed to be. We all cheered for Eiji during that part of the story so why when Ash listens to what his enemies say about him, what they want from him people just accept this is what he can’t escape? Eiji never bought into the whole “they can never be together anyway because Destiny” either. They are more than a needless trouble to each other and what they are to each other when they’re together is worth more than the risk because they are simultaneously each other’s salvation too. Ash isn’t the only one who needed the other person, Eiji was depressed and purposeless before he came to America and he understands all that. In turn, Eiji isn’t there only to make Ash feel momentarily good, if he actually listened to Eiji it could help Ash to step outside the monster fate others scripted for him and I think it’s a shame that we have an ending that despite all the earlier declarations makes Eiji’s efforts useless, Ash resigns while ending allows the villain’s narrative to triumph.
One thing I've noticed is that people who like the ending saying they embrace the "necessary tragedy" in the same breath reframe it as positive, packaging it in this cushiony comforting language of liberation and sugary uplifting metaphors. Which ring entirely false if you actually face the reality of his ending. In the end Eiji didn't free Ash, having it this way means Ash bled out because he evidently thought he doesn't deserve anything better, ending means that despite cherishing Eiji's love for him Ash died still believing he's a monster who can't escape his fate. Dies believing he can't even be free. He was comforted by Eiji but it did not change anything because he didn't listen to him. I guess some people avoid confronting themselves with all that choosing instead to sugarcoat in order to reconcile but if you appreciate the harshness and you're vocal that some endings gotta be like that then why frantically reconstructing it as a joyful, epic resolution, making it out to be deep and cathartic event. If you say it's in agreement with story themes/convention then at least be consequential and admit it's bleak instead of repeating how it was actually soooo good for Ash to die. I know the strategically placed letter lends itself to try and dress Ash death in superlatives but the truth is all the happy things it meant happened earlier and have zero to do with Ash death, moreover his bleeding out crosses them out, they serve only to sweeten the morbid and sad thing that is happening. The fact of Ash dying didn't make him happy, free, didn't change his life for the better because it literally finishes it. Death doesn't magically capture all the good things forever while getting rid of the bad. So many can't acknowledge what it means, it's really that simple and awful. It doesn't bring anything good to Ash, it doesn't make him feel good. The letter did but death took everything away, the good along with the bad. So forgive me if I'm not thrilled for him...
It's quite cruel that how everything is purposefully arranged to be so doomed for a long time, then at one moment the whole conflict is resolved to give us false hope just to immediately tear it away and knock it down for good. It is of course done for more drama but it's also what makes the end so unsatisfying and makes us feel cheated out of a resolution. This sort of emotional blackmail and mixed emotions used repeatedly through BF to evoke the biggest possible response has once again unintentionally backfired on itself. BF ending is supposed to be a heartbreaker but only a fraction of that emotion is truly authentic or earned because the entire thing is built only to pain the reader, everything targeted with the eventual tragedy in mind. It’s viciously manipulative almost to an unseemly extent and becoming a shameless morbid tear jerker. I don't think there's a necessary correlation between good affecting fiction and the amount of torture inflicted on the character, I don't think the more it makes you squirm the more effective a work of art is, often on the contrary. And once you go overboard with it things become too artificial, coldly calculated. The story sacrifices consistent plot and character growth for cheap thrills in service of one weepy goal. It uses suffering of the characters and the readers in a very exploitative way, counting on creating an impact in such manner risks the story becoming a torture porn keeping it from having real developed resolution.
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Top 3 best endings I have experienced in manga/anime.
Code Geass
Banana Fish
Death Note (manga)
Anime of the day: Code Geass
Released: 2006
The Holy Empire of Britannia has taken over Japan. It is now Region 11. Some Japanese citizens fight the Britannian rule and caught up in this fight is Britannian student Lelouch. While trapped in this conflict he meets C.C. She gives him a power called Geass. Now he can give an order and the person can not disobey him; however, he can only do it once. With this new found power Lelouch decides to change the world under the name Zero.
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Pronunciation letter by letter
A:
(E)A+U > "O": Bateau - Boat (\ba.to\)
AI > "É": Aigre - Bitter (\ɛɡʁ\)
AÏ > "A-I": Maïs - Corn (\ma.is\)
A+Y > "ÉY": Ayant - Having (\ɛ.jɑ̃\)
AM or AN+consonant > "AN" (nasal): Manger - To eat (\mɑ̃.ʒe\); +vowel > "ANN": Banane - Banana.
C:
C+A, L, O, R, U > K. Café - Coffee, Clé - Key, Copain - Buddy, Cri - A scream
C+E, I > SS. Cercle - Circle, Citron - Lemon
C+H > CH. Chaussette - Sock (exceptions)
Ç > SS: Maçon (bricklayer, m), français-e (french)
Second words: G. Seconde, secondaire, etc.
D:
Mute when part of a compound word: Grand-mère (\ɡʁɑ̃.mɛʁ\)
E:
E+MM > "A": Femme - Woman (\fam\), Apparemment
Mute as a final letter: Chaise - Chair (\ʃɛz\)
F:
Mute in plural words when after (-)oeu: Oeufs - Eggs (\ø\), Boeufs
Mute in Cerf - Deer, Clef - Key, Chef d'oeuvre - Masterpiece
Turns into V when followed by -H or -vowel: Neuf heures
G:
[g]:
G+A: Béluga
G+O: Goéland - Seagull
G+U: Gueule - Animal's face
[j]:
G+E: Mirage
G+I: Magie
G+Y: Gymnopédie
H:
H- > mute: Hérisson - Hedgehog
C+H > CH: Chat - Cat
P+H > F: Philippe
I:
IM or IN+consonant > "IN" (nasal): Invisible - Invisible (\ɛ̃.vi.zibl\); +vowel or +M/N+vowel > "INN": Bouquiner - To casually read (\bu.ki.ne\), Immoral - Immoral (\im.mɔ.ʁal\)
-LL-:
\j\ (after -i-): Cheville - Ankle, Abeille - Bee
\l\: Allemand, Installer - To install
-i-: There's at least one letter before the vowel (Ex: Billard) which has to be I.
Exceptions: Mille/Millième/Million/Milliard, Tranquille, Ville.
O:
OEU > "EU": Soeur - Sister (\sœʁ\)
OE > "É": Oedipe - Oedipus (\ø.dip\)
OË > "O-É": Noël - Christmas (\nɔ.ɛl\)
OM or ON+consonant > "ON" (nasal): Bonjour - Hello (\bɔ̃.ʒuʁ\), Accomplir - To achieve (\a.kɔ̃.pliʁ\); +vowel or -N+vowel > "ONN": Personne - Nobody (\pɛʁ.sɔn\)
OO > "O-O": Zoo - Zoo (\zo.o\)
OU > "OO": Couper - To cut (\ku.pe\)
-P(S):
Mute unless it's borrowed from English or anatomical. (-)Corps - Body, (-)Temps - Time/Weather, Draps - Sheets, Sirop - Syrup... as opposed to Clip, Triceps, Stop, etc.
Trop (Too much/Way too), when followed by a vowel, is not mute: Trop_aimable.
-R:
Pronounced in: masculine adjectives: Fier - Proud; verbs of the second/third groups ending in -(o)ir : Dormir - To sleep; names in -a/o/ir : César; nouns after -i/er: Désir - Desire; nouns after -our/eur: Labeur - Hard work/labor; prepositions: Pour - For; nouns borrowed from other languages: Boxer - Dog breed+job.
Not pronounced in: infinitive first-group verbs ending in -er: Manger - To eat; Monsieur/messieurs - Sir-s; masculine names in -er : Roger; (masculine) job nouns in -(i)er: Infirmier - Nurse; masculine adjectives in -ier except if followed by a noun starting with a vowel: Premier - First, Dernier - Last…
S:
S- > SS: Sucre - Sugar
SC+LS > SS: Fils (\fis\) - Son, Scie (\si\) - Saw
S > SS: Poisson - Fish
-S (N.B.: For a not-verb/not-noun): SS or mute. Tous as an indefinite adjective, a comparative, a superlative or a negative: mute. Ex: Il n’y a plu(s) de pain - There’s no more bread, C’est la plu(s) gentille - She’s the nicest; as an indefinite pronoun: SS. Ex: Tous ces hommes - All these men.
N.B: When -s is followed by a vowel, make the liaison: Vous avez (Vou-z-avé) - You have, Les éléphants(lé-z-éléfan) - The elephants
X:
[ks]:
when inside a word: Texte (\tɛkst\)
when it follows E and is followed by a consonant: Excellent
when a word ends in -ax, -ex, -inx, -ox, -ynx, and sometimes -ix or -yx: Thorax, Lynx
[gz]:
when the first letter of a word: Xylophone (\ɡzi.lɔ.fɔn\)
when it follows E and is followed by either a vowel or H: Exactement - Exactly, Exhumer
[s]:
in SIX (6) and DIX (10), when used without an object: J’en ai six (\sis\)
in DIX-SEPT (17) and numbers from 60 to 69: Soixante (\swa.sɑ̃t\)
in the name of certain cities: Bruxelles (\bʁy.sɛl\), Auxerre
[z]:
in numbers derived from DEUX (2), SIX (6), DIX (10): Sixième, Dix-huit, Deuxième (\dø.zjɛm\)
[/]:
when a word ends in -eux: Heureux - Happy (\œ.ʁø\), -aux, -eaux, oux, aux: Chevaux - Horses
when an invariant word ends in -x: Choix - Choice, Voix - Voice
Y:
-y- > /i/: Cycle
Y- > /j/: Yeux - Eyes
N.B.: When Yeux follows a plural determiner or adjective, don't forget to pronounce the Z (S+X). Les yeux: Lé-z-ieu.
Z:
Mute when final: Nez, Chez; turns the -E- into "É" (\ne\)
Anywhere else, regular pronunciation: Zéro, Nazi
Fanmail - masterlist (2016-) - archives - hire me - reviews (2020-) - Drive
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*strokes the amazing Yiga Scribe's ego and offers the best bananas* May I submit a request? I'm neutral on mpreg but I'm HUGE on big belly kink. I got to thinking, what about a scene that takes place in your mpreg AU, where Kohga is 9 months pregnant with the triplets and just... HUGE and Sooga just can't handle how sexy he thinks that is? Love and bananes! 🍌🍌🍌❤️❤️❤️
*sighs in pregnancy kink* let's get Sooga horny as SHIT.
Sooga was a lucky man. He was in a relationship with a man who was as beautiful as bananas were delicious. Nice, beautiful hands, the most incredible looking face, and, most sexy of all; he was baring his children. Boys, and THREE of them.
"Aaand we're done! Wonderful job, Master Kohga!"
"I. Hate. Everything."
Kohga had agreed to do some light work outs, mainly in the form of yoga, and even though he complained every time, his Master hadn't skipped a day. Even if it was a struggle. Sooga saw it as Kohga laid against his front, absolutely exhausted. Sooga kissed his head, absolutely in love with his flushed husband.
"But you did SO well today. I'm so proud of you!"
"Uh huh. Can we fucking EAT now?"
Kohga was ALWAYS hungry, and Sooga couldn’t blame him; growing three, strapping boys was a full time job, no wonder he was so cranky.
"Absolutely you may. What would you like?"
"I want ice cream. Definitely. With nuts. And carmel."
"I think I remember the kitchen making brownies earlier, would you like some?"
"YES. In the ice cream. And banana slices-"
"At the very end, or they'll get soggy. I'm aware, my Master. Do you need to be carried to the room?"
"You ain't gonna let me walk soon as I squeeze these bastards out, might as well get some steps in. I uh, could use some help standing up."
Sooga nodded. His poor husband, so heavy and dependent on him. He reached out his arm, allowing Kohga to hold onto him. He helped walk him to the room, carefully, before he felt Kohga smack at his shoulder.
"What'd I do?"
"You're GROWLING at people, Sooga."
"I am? I didn't even notice. Well, their fault regardless, everyone keeps looking as if they want to touch your stomach."
"YOU touch it?"
"I'm their father. Everyone but me and you have no right to touch them. But, I will try to remain civil."
Sooga opened the door for Kohga, allowing him to walk inside. Sooga made eye contact with Cil, before flipping him the bird. Damn vulture. He shut the door behind him, helping Kohga to the bed, fluffing the pillows as he liked it.
"Ugh...my goddamn feet. I swear this shit hurts."
"Would you like me to rub your feet?"
"I'd like you to get the goddamn ice cream I asked for."
"You're adorable ~"
Such an attitude. He kissed his forehead, before excusing himself to the kitchen. And as usual, EVERYONE working there were excited to get ANY news to spread around the clan (the cooks were such gossips queens)
"Sooga! How's Kohga?"
"Anything new to report?"
"He's doing well. He's hungry. I need ice cream, you know, the sundaes he likes."
They nodded, working together to make quite the pretty sundae. Stuffed to the brim with ice cream, carmel sauce, nuts, thick brownies, whipped cream, and sliced bananas, on the side of course. They handed him the tray, and Sooga was about to leave, when they added something else to the tray; crispy salmon skin. Kohga, much to his anger, had grown to like fish since his pregnancy. Salmon skin was the new banana chip. They gave him a little wave, before he excused himself.
He stepped back into the room, and set the ice cream down before adding the bananas, and presenting it to Kohga.
"FINALLY. These fuckheads are STARVED."
Kohga tucked into his dessert happily, and it warmed Sooga’s heart. He looked so happy.
"Is that all? I'd uhm...like to rest, my feet h-"
"No, they fucking don't, just SAY you wanna cuddle, you fuckshit."
It was true. Sooga never really felt body pains (at least not enough to complain), he just didn't know how to ask for cuddles, especially with grumpy Kohga, but Kohga just. Knew him well enough to know what he wanted, always. Sooga crawled into bed, super careful as he rested his chin on his belly (he would prefer his chest, but Kohga smacked him with a spoon last time, so). He watched lovingly as Kohga helped himself to his cold treat. Cheeks rosey and stuffed, just like his bare belly. The yiga attire was meant to stretch for any size, but Kohga needed a change ever since his six month mark.
A see through robe, thin enough to breathe and move around in. It screamed 'pregnant mom', given the style, but to Sooga, it was INCREDIBLY sexy.
"Are you three liking the ice cream too? Is it too cold? Are you getting brain freeze? Can babies get a brain freeze?"
Kohga swallowed his last bite, before putting his empty cup on the night stand next to them. He sighed, damn near annoyed.
"Dunno. But I know they give ME a headache. AND you. God what if they're like your dumbass?"
"I agree. I sincerely hope they're going be like you. Strong, wonderful, kind, TERRIBLY handsome-"
He stopped once Kohga lightly winced. He panicked for a moment, before settling down.
"Sorry. Little shits are hyper as fuck."
"You DID just give them ice cream, and lots of it. It's adorable. All of it is. Gods you're perfect."
He leaned down to kiss his bare belly (he accidentally pulled up his shirt, believe him), humming in content.
"Sooga?"
"Hmm?"
"Your boner is literally pressing against my leg right now."
Sooga looked down at himself. He was right. He cleared his throat, feeling embarrassed.
"I...sorry. You're just. So big, and voluptuous and beautiful and SO full with my pups-"
"Fucks sake, Sooga, just. Jerk off already."
Suffice to say, this wasn't the first time Sooga had been aroused by the situation, so Kohga was used to his man's bullshit. Sooga would have insisted he didn't need it but his erection proved otherwise. He swung his legs over Kohga, and made his body hold itself up. Wouldn’t want to hurt the little ones, afterall. He pulled himself out of his clothes, slowly starting to pump his cock. And Kohga just. Stared. Stared in a sort of 'I'm above you' mentality that he seemed to gain upon his pregnancy.
And Sooga LOVED it. He was merely tolerating him, gracing him in his grandeur.
"You always take so fucking long with this. You got a nice looking cock, and you do jack shit with it."
Sooga chuckled, pushing the tip of his cock and forcing precum to leak onto his hand. He was careful as he loomed over him, wanting to see every bit of him. His face, his chest, his big, wonderful, incredible, gorgeous stomach. Everything.
"The better to savor you with, my Master. The better to appreciate you with. The better to see the absolute beauty that your womb-"
He was silenced when Kohga leaned up a bit, and pulled his hair tie out of his hair, letting it fall. Sooga wished he could take a picture of this moment. Of Kohga laying there, tired of him, holding his hair tie in his hand as if he were trash. Yet, the smirk at his lips let him subtly know he was loved. The great faeries wished they looked as big and beautiful as he did.
"Sooga. You're a sweetheart, really. But GOD shut the fuck up and just cum on me, I need a nap like, yesterday."
"Of course my Master, sincere apologies on my part. I'll finish, without much grandeur. Provided...I have a little assistance?"
He asked, hopeful. Either he'd get a hand, or a hand to the back of the head. Kohga scoffed in disbelief.
"Fucking hell, stomach kink son of a-FINE."
He offered his hand to him. Just his open hand. That was enough. He took his hand in his own, using his hand to help him stroke his cock. Oh the way it made a shiver run down his spine. It was all he needed. He took no more than a minute or so (too long for Kohga’s taste), before he finally got what he wanted. A hot, creamy load on his belly in plentful ribbons. Oh sweat never felt so good.
"Shit...thank you, Master Kohga. Truly. I needed that."
"Yeah yeah yeah. You done fawning over me?"
"Never. You look like a big, lovely cinnamon roll~"
Kohga wiped his hand on Sooga’s stomach, clicking his tongue.
"You're awful. Lay down with me already, you need a nap too."
Sooga let himself fall on his side, before clinging tightly onto Kohga. Sooga didn't clean up his mess, and it was something they were both okay with.
"...Master Kohga?"
"Hmm?"
"Do you...think they'll like me?"
"They should. I know I do."
"Even when I just can't leave you alone?"
"Yeah, even then. SOMEONE has to fuss over me."
Sooga pressed his lips against his messy, hairy tummy.
"I'll fuss over them as well. Till the end of time. My...family. All mine, to safeguard, and protect with my life."
Kohga rolled his eyes, running his fingers through his hair. It always did help him fall asleep.
"And I'll teach them how to deal with adoring idiots like you."
Sooga lovingly stroked and loved at his plumpness. Beautiful.
"Have we thought of names?"
"They're yours, so Dumb, Dumber, and Dumbfuck."
He was about to interject, when they both felt one of them kick. Kohga laughed, his legs flailing wildly.
"THEY LIKE IT! THAT'S IT, THAT'S THEIR NAMES!"
"Master Kohga please-"
"Listen, I spent nine months with these fucks mooching off of me, the LEAST I can do is give them the funniest fucking names."
"I...love you, Master Kohga."
He didn't know what family life entailed. He just knew he was ready.
#asks#kohga#sooga#lemon#kohga got SUCH an attitude upon the pregnancy#and it just. makes soogas heart go doki doki
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Off Grid Desert Farming with Pastor Penn and Scholar Alexia, part 2
Count Vanilla was singing "Sweet Dreams R Made of These" as he wore a black collar with a blue bell in the front and swam in an ocean of vanilla ice cream. He then started to dance similarly to Michael Jackson near Annie Lennox. They were dancing like they were walking on broken glass.
"Blue Bell Vanilla Ice Cream. Nothing is sweeter than the sweet dream made of Blue Bell Vanilla Ice Cream," Emilie Autumn narrated.
--------------------------------------------------------------------
The next commercial played "This Banana Feels Like It's On Ice Cream" by System of The Beer (based on "This Cocaine Makes Me Feels Like I'm On This Song." by System of A Down) and showed Prince Banana Ice wearing his golden crown, his facial and ear piercings (minus his lip piercings), the black collar with Bananas hanging off of it, black shirt with a giant banana on it, and a bright yellow speedo surfing on a giant banana in an ocean of vanilla ice cream with banana sharks while holding a giant Banana split in his right hand.
Prince Banana Ice then started singing super quickly as he surfed wildly through the ice cream waves:
"There's nothing wrong with me
There's nothing wrong with you
There's something wrong with me
I hope my sister doesn't eat the fish
When we're crying for our next fix
There's nothing wrong with me
There's nothing wrong with you
There's something wrong with me
I hope my sister doesn't eat the fish
When we're crying for our next fix
Bananas quell feelings
Bananas quell feelings
Bananas quell feelings
Balalalalalala split!
Balalalalalala split!
Single files of clean feedings
I can see your souls through through your eyes
The crumbling walls of sliding architecture
Kidnapped by the likes of pure conjecture
Banana loving men all eating in the hells
Kidnapped by the likes of pure conjecture
Bananas quell feelings
Bananas quell feelings
Bananas quell feelings
Balalalalalala split!
Balalalalalala split!
Single files of clean feedings
There's nothing wrong with me
There's nothing wrong with you
Wrong with you and I
When we're crying for our next fix
There's nothing wrong with me
There's nothing wrong with you
Wrong with you and I
When we're crying for our next fix
Bananas quell feelings
Bananas quell feelings
Bananas quell feelings
Balalalalalala split!
Balalalalalala split!
Single files of clean feedings
Double cherry strawberry
There's nothing wrong with me
There's nothing wrong with you
There's something wrong with me
I hope my sister doesn't eat the fish
There's nothing wrong with me
There's nothing wrong with you
There's nothing wrong with me
There's nothing wrong with you
There's something wrong with me
I hope my sister doesn't eat the fish
There's nothing wrong with me
There's nothing wrong with you!
Because it's banana
Because it's a cocaine
Because it's vanilla bean
Because it's icy cream
Balalalalalalalalalas!"
Then Prince Banana Ice hung 10 on the banana surf board and spoke normally, "Balalalalalalalalalas is French for Banana split made with vanilla ice cream and crack cocaine! And it's fucking awesome! Woohoooo!!!!" He had the biggest smile on his face and his eyes were super wide yet not ready to fall out of his head like they normally are when he is excited.
Then Prince Banana Ice narrated in French, but the closed caption translated, "I scream for banana ice cream... with crack cocaine. It's legal on the Green Planet."
Then Prince Banana Ice narrated quickly in French, but the closed caption said, "Wedonotrecommendyouactuallyaddingcrackcocainetoyourbananasplit. Ifyouwantthesameeffect,buyBlueBananavanillaicecream.It'ssosweetitmightaswellbecrackcocaine."
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There was a loud static sound before a male fairy bee with brown straight hair and intense green eyes flew on the screen.
"Sorry to interrupt your transmission, but someone just set off a bomb at Altis Grocer Market on Brad Street in Athenia, Glorgia. Someone ought cover that shit! Someone ought cover that shit! Someone ought cover that shit! Someone ought cover that shit! Someone ought cover that shit! Someone ought cover that shit! Someone ought cover that shit!" the male fairy bee spoke in a squeaky voice for a dude.
"WHAT?! THAT'S THE SIXTH OR SEVENTH BOMBING TODAY! LORD HAVE MERCY!" Pastor Penn shouted.
"What the fuck is going on?!" King Bruce Ice shouted as he threw his paws in the air.
"Why the fuck would you bomb a grocery store, you fucking idiot!" Prince Banana Ice shouted as he jumped off the surf board and carried it to the main news screen. "Thanks for fucking up the food supply EVEN MORE!" He growled out of frustration and threw his surf board at the weather screen.
"I agree! It's fucked up! It's bullshit!" Captain Slammer shouted on the screen with the backdrop of his house in the background. It was raining outside.
"How's the weather, Captain Slammer?" King Bruce Ice asked.
"It's FUCKING HOT! It's fucking rainy. It's crazy. It's bullshit. A meteor from the Planet Neiber or Fluggoit decided to wipe out my fucking garden," Captain Slammer said. Rain was pouring down on his head. We could hear rain drops pounding against the shield on his back.
A giant meteor then crashed right into his house. Lightning struck down another tree in his yard.
Captain Slammer then whipped his head around and saw what happened. "WHAT THE (yes, he made the actual bleeping sound)?"
Prince Oliver: Werewolf of the United Planets decided to ask, "Would you like a banana split with some Blue Bell Vanilla ice cream and crack cocaine?"
"Yes please. Add extra cocaine and go easy on the Banana. I'm not gay," Captain Slammer said with a smile with gritted teeth. He looked like a drenched goat.
"I'm not gay either. I'm not gay either. I'm not gay either. I'm not gay either. I'm not gay either. I'm not gay either," Count Vanilla and the male fairy bee shouted in unison.
Then Count Vanilla continued, "I'm not gay either. I'm not gay either."
"Oh fuck just what we needed. Another character who repeats himself! First the Twix galaxy implodes. Then two or three bears blow themselves in the Kabbabullibulli space station because who the fuck knows why. Then some FUCKING IDIOT decides to blow up the grocery store because he's a fucking asshole! Captain Slammer's house gets hit with a meteor and a lightning storm, and THE MALE FAIRY BEEEE zzzzz REPEATS HIMSELF SEVEN TIMES PER SENTENCE!" Prince Banana Ice shouted as he raised his arms in the air.
"That was a great recap, Prince Banana Ice," Scholar Alexia said.
"Agreed. I couldn't have done a better job myself. Prince Banana Ice, can you humor a wolf mama and scream for banana ice cream... preferably in French... one more time?" asked Milk Mama Chrissy the queenliest submissive drama queen of the Planetary Broadcasting Corporation.
"Merci. Oui, Crissy de Lait," Prince Banana Ice spoke in French. Anyone can tell that French was his native language. "Je crie pour la glace à la banane!"
"Aaaahhhhhh!!!! Such a beautiful sound has aroused my teets," Crissy de Lait, soumise de derriere said.
"May I suck them then?" a man with brown eyes and wild red hair asked Crissy de Lait, soumise de derriere. I remember him being a master chef of macaroni and cheese at Chuckee Queso's Chipotle Mexican Pizza Grill.
"After the broadcast. Pastor Penn is supposed to have the floor," Crissy de Lait, soumise de derriere said.
"'Supposed to' being the key phrase. All went to Hell in a handbag when the grocery store got bombed. More information will come soon," Pastor Penn said.
"Indeed it will. Indeed it will. Indeed it will. Indeed it will. Indeed it will. Indeed it will. Indeed it will. I'm going to interview everyone and cover the story myself. I'm going to interview everyone and cover the story myself. I'm going to interview everyone and cover the story myself. I'm going to interview everyone and cover the story myself. I'm going to interview everyone and cover the story myself. I'm going to interview everyone and cover the story myself. I'm going to interview everyone and cover the story myself," the male fairy bee said.
"You go do that, but who are you and what association do you work for?" Pastor Penn asked.
"I'm Kodex with the Green Planet Explorers. I'm Kodex with the Green Planet Explorers. I'm Kodex with the Green Planet Explorers. I'm Kodex with the Green Planet Explorers. I'm Kodex with the Green Planet Explorers. I'm Kodex with the Green Planet Explorers. I'm Kodex with the Green Planet Explorers," Kodex answered.
"Also. Why do you repeat yourself seven times?" Pastor Penn asked.
"Because I'm 27 years old with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. The end digit of my age is seven, which is how many times I have to repeat myself," Kodex answered.
"Really? I'm nine. That's why I repeat myself nine times. That's why I repeat myself nine times. That's why I repeat myself nine times. That's why I repeat myself nine times. That's why I repeat myself nine times. That's why I repeat myself nine times. That's why I repeat myself nine times. That's why I repeat myself nine times. That's why I repeat myself nine times," Count Vanilla said.
"You sound like you're a lot older than nine. You sound like you're a lot older than nine. You sound like you're a lot older than nine. You sound like you're a lot older than nine. You sound like you're a lot older than nine. You sound like you're a lot older than nine. You sound like you're a lot older than nine," Kodex said.
King Bruce Ice was trying to shoot eye lasers at both of them at the same time. "Jesus with you two, no one is going to get the news!"
Prince Banana Ice was narrowing his eyes to the side and visibly gritting his sharp teeth.
"Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry," Count Vanilla and Kodex said.
Then Count Vanilla continued, "Sorry. Sorry. It's a long story. Too long for this broadcast." He chuckled nine times.
Prince Banana Ice threw his crown across the room and folded his arms tightly around his chest. He was shooting neon yellow eye lasers in Count Vanilla's direction. Count Vanilla growled and danced over a few of them.
"Thank you. Pastor Penn, can you please continue the broadcast before I kill someone?" King Bruce Ice asked.
"Yes. There have been enough deaths today. Thank you for your time, Kodex," Pastor Penn said.
"You're welcome. You're welcome. You're welcome. You're welcome. You're welcome. You're welcome. You're welcome," Kodex said as he flew out the door. "I'm used to eye lasers and all kinds of shit. I'm going to do some JOURNALISM. God Forbid. God Forbid. God Forbid. God Forbid. God Forbid. God Forbid. God Forbid!"
Pastor Penn couldn't help but chuckle.
"I really wish I would have thrown my rocket shoe at him. The only thing I have against him is that he repeats himself too much in news broadcasting," Prince Banana Ice said. "Other than that, he's a nice guy."
"Yeeeeeepppppppppp pah," King Bruce Ice said as he rolled his eyes and opened his mouth dramatically.
"Anyway, let's take this moment to talk about my brother, Brandon. He isn't doing too well healthwise. He is currently unconscious at the Intensive Care Unit in the United States of America on Earth and has a breathing tube in his throat. He has always been a wild black sheep bear. No really, his fur is more like wool. I guess he inherited that freak recessive sheep gene of the family from my great great great great great great great grandfather. He's about 10 years older than I am and is nothing like me. I asked my parents several times throughout my life if he was adopted. They assured me he wasn't. But I still have questions. Brandon was addicted to everything including gambling, alcohol, shrooms, dope, crack, cocaine, honey, sex with anything that moves except family members, and being in virtual reality throughout his life. To this day, he doesn't go a day without smoking four packs of cigarettes a day or drinking a bottle of wine a day. I'm sure even unconscious with a breathing tube down his throat, he is still dreaming about smoking and drinking to excess. All we can do is pray for him," Pastor Penn said.
"Sounds like he knows how to party," Prince Banana Ice said.
"Oh yeah. It's ridiculous. He's a terrible role model. He has children, too. And his whole intermediate family got jabbed. It's very sad," Pastor Penn said as he was about to cry.
Scholar Alexia scooted over to Pastor Penn and patted his shoulder. "Truly sad. A lot of families are having the same problem. More and more people are getting jabbed, and it is very tragic. Especially with what we know now."
"We are in End Times. Families are fighting families. It's the unjabbed versus the jabbed. Famine is rampant. Wars are rampant," Pastor Penn said.
"Also, Bruce and Ann the Goats just got jabbed. Queen Xara and I clean their office for them. Very sad news. We just got intel from Joel the Goat, the assistant manager. He is still standing firm on resisting the jab," King Joebear said on a screen from our home.
"Damn! Is everyone named 'Bruce' on this planet?!" King Bruce Ice asked.
There were two dings from Pastor Penn's pager.
"The good news is that Brandon is at least recovering from the breathing issue. My other brother just texted me saying that Brandon is needing less oxygen from the tube. A very good sign. All we can do now is keep praying. Also, very sad news about your Goat bosses getting jabbed. I'm sure it is mortifying. Have you been fired for not getting the jab yet?" Pastor Penn said.
"No, but it's in the works, I'm sure," King Joebear said.
"But if they fire us, it's their loss. I don't give a fuck about the jab. They can HAVE it!" I shouted from the camera in the dressing room. I was still in my snowman nightgown and jean cut-off because fuck this shit. I'm broke.
"Amen," Scholar Alexia said.
"Amen," Captain Slammer said as his house was now replaced by a gigantic meteor.
"Amen to the welfare of Brandon!" Wonder Nurse shouted as she video-bombed Captain Slammer's screen. "We live in a meteor now! The Lord has answered our prayers!"
"Amen!" Pastor Penn said with a smile.
Captain Slammer just looked at her oddly before he turned back to the camera and said, "There is a 100 percent chance that fire and brimstone will be raining from the sky in addition to acid rain drops falling on my head. Take cover and please try not to go outside for the next few weeks." He added a flashy smile at the end.
"Thank you for that lovely weather report, Captain Slammer," Pastor Penn said.
"You're welcome!" Captain Slammer shouted before Prince Banana Ice handed balalalalalalalalalas, banana splits with cherries, strawberry, vanilla ice cream and crack cocaine to him and Wonder Nurse. Captain Slammer's balalalalalalalalalas had a small banana and extra vanilla sprinkles added as he requested earlier. "Thank you, Prince Banana Ice!" He took a bite of the balalalalalalalalalas and grinned. "You definitely ARE Prince Banana Ice! Woohoohoohoo!!!!" He then started to fly off the screen with wide eyes. "I'M CAPTAIN SLAMMER REPORTING LIVE ON THE WEATHER!" He continued gobbling the banana split.
Wonder Nurse took a bite of her balalalalalalalalalas and then flew. "Wooohoooooo! I'm Wonder Nurse, and I am going to save the wounded astronauts!" She also continued to eat her balalalalalalalalalas as she flew.
"These banana splits help us cope with this (encrypted voice done by Milk Mama Chrissy, Encrypting Genius saying "Shitake") weather," Prince Banana Ice said as he stood outside as giant bananas fell out of the sky and his fur was getting disheveled in the high winds. He had the hugest smile and brightest brown hazel eyes on his face.
"I'll take your word for it. Ladies and gentlemen, we have one more story to tell before we have to end our broadcast and let Queen Xara, Stan Doe, and Prince Peter Wallace Parker do theirs," Pastor Penn said.
"Yes. Go ahead. The show must go on," Milk Mama Chrissy said.
"Excuse me. I don't mean to interrupt your broadcast, I know you have had a lot of interruptions this hour, but for those of you who are not informed, on Planet AstraZeneca in the Snickers Galaxy and Austria and/or Australia on Planet Earth in the Milkway Galaxy, the government is punishing those of us who are unjabbed by throwing us in jail for six years and fining us $66,600. I just wanted to share how real this is and how it is the (encrypted voice done by Milk Mama Chrissy, Encrypting Genius saying, "Biometric signature").," a dark brown wooly sheep with easy brown eyes said in a low English voice.
"Good Heavens, Found Sheep! It is good to see you! How have you been?!" Prince Oliver: Werewolf of the United Planets shouted in excitement.
"I have been walking with Lord, but I can't say much else," Found Sheep said in his great narration voice. He had a good voice to read audiobooks.
"Great answer, Found Sheep. And no, that was an important interruption. Thank you. It was one of the news stories I was going to cover in tomorrow's live broadcast. It's true. Look it up on B-M-J.cahm, Broad Mediterranean Journalism. It's true. Folks, the Plague's been around since 2015 according to them, but Queen Xara reported that her first exposure to it was in 2014. She'll give you more detail in her report," Pastor Penn said.
"It's true. The Lord has revealed much to me since my walk with him. Thank you, Pastor Penn," Found Sheep spoke.
"No thank you. And for our final story, Martial Law. I repeat Martial Law. It's Wal-mart backwards. Martial Law is coming. The military has turned on its citizens. If you don't obey the "woke" soldiers, you will be shot. They will treat you like an enemy. We are not safe. They want to jab us. The Green Planet has become the Black Planet. The United States of America is no longer what it used to be. It's an extension of Communist China. You better wake up. And no I do not mean "woke." Off Grid Desert Farming exists to prepare you for the future. What do you do about martial law? Seek comfort in our Lord. Our Lord is coming back. Don't be caught dead without him," Pastor Penn said.
Loud elevator music played in the background as Milk Mama Chrissy spoke. "Thank you very much, Pastor Penn for your informative broadcast! Next up, Queen Xara, Stan Doe, and Prince Peter Wallace Parker with their razzle bullshit." She then smiled at the camera.
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Omfg i finished watching banan fish this morning and now im tryna study but THE ENDING KEEPS PLAYING IN MY HEAD AND I CANT— FUCK-
#banana fish#ash lynx#eiji okumura#okumura eiji#aslan jade callenreese#banana fish was great#didnt like the ending tho#cries#AHHH#help
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i have just realised im probably gonna finnish assassination classroom and banan fish on the same day and i know that both endings make everyone cry so im about to be a wreck
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Banan Fish Ending
+Spoilers for Garden of Light. Thoughts about the characters and their journeys.
Ash’s greatest fear was that he has become a monster by surving all the abuse and managing to free himself from Dino. The fact that many characters tend to compare him to a devil/wild beast/cat isn’t helping (and the origins are already there in his childhood story with the pumpkins where he frightened himself). That’s why Eiji seeing him for a human he was, accepting all the good, bad and broken and loving him after it all, was so incredibly important and precious to Ash - to the point that he felt lucky and happy about that little time he had with Eiji and it even brought him peace in his death.
Ash deserved a future after all that pain he want through. He could have started a new life after Dino was killed, go to university and have a real job like Eiji, realizing his abilities and talents to their full potential for something meaningful and better then gang wars and violence.
In a way it was a questionable move from the author to kill Ash just because she didn’t know what to do with Ash’s life after he killed so many people. Well Ash’s kills were justified since he was doing them in self-defense (although there was a bit of a difference in attitude between Ash and Sing - but hell even Yut-Lung got his redemption and Sing took over the Chinese syndicate and still went to university and had a nice life - so why couldn’t Ash?)
Sing had it maybe even worse then Eiji after Ash’s death because he didn’t just know and care about Ash but also knew and loved Lao as his older brother. He was feeling double grief, was conflicted about Ash dying by his beloved brother’s hand and even felt guilty about it and tried to compensate for it to Eiji.
Lao wasn’t completely unjustified in his hatred towards Ash. From the outside Ash seems like this incredible, unnaturally powerful guy with sometimes questionable acts of heartless brutality. He doesn’t seem human to other characters from the outside and he doesn’t exactly work on any alliances. Plus there was the whole mess with Shorter’s death that Lao couldn’t forgive (and that was kind of pointless to keep secret after Dino’s death and destruction of Banan Fish drug). Final deciding factor is in my opinion that Lao actually believed this was the only way to save Sing from being killed by Ash in their planned duel - which Lao didn’t know was cancelled since he left the gang before that. Not liking Ash would be okay if Lao didn’t go after him because of it - which I don’t think he would if there wasn’t the issue with Sing’s unavoidable death in the duel.
Eiji’s role and development in the story wasn’t to become a skilled fighter like Ash - it was to stay true to his good heart, empathy and pureness. He was able to sense other people’s pain and soothe them and he could make friends with many people in the series that have helped him to help Ash when it was beyond his abilities. And that’s okay since Eiji was a normal teenage kid and it isn’t fair to compare him to Sing, Cain or Alex but only to himself at the beginning and at the end.
In the end Eiji is the tragic survivor having lost his soul mate. But he came to peace with that grief and it didn’t break him so irreparably that he wouldn’t be able to have a proper life or experience happiness and connect with others. Which is exactly what Ash would have wanted for him.
Eiji is able to deal with that impossible loss by gaining more perspective over time and is able look at it positively by appreciating he met Ash at all (just like Ash treasured the time he had with Eiji and was willing to sacriface everything for that bond and still felt happy to have it)
It’s comforting that Ash is remebered in a good way after such violent short life by people like Eiji, Sing and Max’s family. In a way Eiji is keeping parts of Ash alive in his memories and with Ash’s pictures.
Lastly Eiji wasn’t able to save Ash from his life and Ash wasn’t able to change because of Eiji. Their time together was short and one could cynically say it was pointless, since it didn’t amount to anything. But that’s not true.
Eiji never regreted meeting Ash despite the pain it brough him and the way it influenced his life. He didn’t save Ash, but he did bring him relief, understanding and comfort.
Ash himself treasured every moment and considered himself infinetly lucky to experinece unconditional love from Eiji - at least from someone in his miserable life. Eiji saw him for the person he was, accepted him and loved him. And Ash might have survived, had he not chosen love over hate, because in his world love meant weakness - and had Ash not loved Eiji he could never have been caught off guard long enough to be killed. But for Ash, it was better to be destroyed by love then live a long powerful life without it.
Even though the anime version doesn't exactly justify the way Ash died, (I still think it felt forced, melodramatic and inconsistent with the whole series - which kind of ruined the emotional poignancy for me), the message itself about fighting for love and freedom in a very cruel part of the world came across just fine. Banana Fish is a complex, meaningful if not flawless story that raises some intriguing points and a represents a valuable addition to modern anime.
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@mistressdratha replied to your post “also i’m sorry but i hate the name spirk. i hate it. it sounds so...”
also congratulations for finishing bananer fish (i assume) what did you think
i did finish it!! i wrote about it in greater length here so i won’t swamp you but god. GOD. FUCK. like it was so good but FUCK. justice for ash and eiji’s happy ending :(
#replies#text post#mistressdratha#i am going to build myself a nest of fix-it fic and live in it for the next month
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Banan Fish ep 22. aka the one we’ve been dreading.
lets take a break from all the sad and depressing stuff with your weekly #bf news post!
Here is the front of the Rownme Dalion Bank. I can only assume that 88 was when the bank was founded and 90 was when this particular building opened? OR it could be the address. I’m not sure how new york street addresses work.
Here, we see a dedication to consistency with the laptop showing that same four square background, which is clearly a take off on the window’s xp background. Also (most of) the keys are labeled. nice job. If only you spent as much time on the faces this episode.
Here is a book with really obviously clear words on it, though its a little tough to make out the authors and subtitle. I cant make out what it says above the title but I think the authors are “Royce Jameson and Jeremy Patrick”. Google didn’t turn up any search results for the names, nor the title. I can only guess that its likely a reference to the “A Perfect Day for Banana Fish” story? But if anyone know anything else, let me know.
Mappa felt it a requirement we know that this is a 1950 vintage wine.
oh look! its the return of Chair and Co. Looks like they have had a bit of an issue with graffiti.
Lastly, we have Ash and Eiji practicing hiragana. Its a little tricky to read the handwriting but the upper left corner is: おはようございます (Ohaiyou gozaimasu) good morning. Then to the right of that is: こんにちは (Konnichiwa) hello/good afternoon. Stack on top of what I think is Arigatou (thank you) because it starts with あ and ends with う. The inside just looks like scribbles tho. Up in the right corner is just the latter a ( あ ) a few times. The bottom corner one is: さよなら (Sayonara) ... good bye. :(
BF text and type from previous eps here: [1] [9] [10] [11] [12] [13] [14] [15] [16] [17] [18] [19] [20] [21]
Still working on catching up on eps 2-8 and double checking 9 and 10.
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Getting Weird
Hello loyal followers! I apologize for the late posting, I was out late last night gathering new blog material in order to serve you better.
Yesterday started out pretty normally, ate some bread on a roof, got lost, etc. I went for a walk by the port/beach and ended up in a fish market, where I peeped many varieties of dead marine life (sharks, sting rays, poissons, crabby crabs, lobster-y lobsters, and some other gross gooey stuff from the sea). After I was bored of that, I headed back to the beach. On my way back, I was stopped by a dude carrying a bag of dead fish who invited me to his house to eat said dead fish (how to pick up a vegan 101). So then I was like nah fam merci though see ya. Then I walked a couple more steps and some guy just really wanted to take a picture with me??? (maybe cause I had my knees out that day? Idk). Anyways, we spent a lot of time getting a good shot (I love connecting with others who are passionate about their angles). He was really nice and didn’t even try to rob me or sell me anything. I’m still confused about the reasoning behind this entire encounter, but whatever.
Then I went to the not fish market and bought a large chunk of bread, quatre tomates, deux carrottes et deux cukes, six bananes, et un avocado for like 20dh. Maybe less. Shit’s ridiculous. I took my provisions back to my hostel (which I can usually find nowadays) and chilled with some aging hippies for a bit, ate some vegetables, drank some tea, considered my next destination, etc for a bit. I might’ve even done reading but I don’t remember. The hippie hostel is very pleasant, also I’ve been the only person in my four bed room for the last two nights which is sweet. Plus there are deux chiens! C’est magnifique!
Soon it was time to start scouting a rooftop location for olive eating. I covered up my knees for this and layered on some sweaters cause plot twist, it’s cold af here. Some of my hostel mates have down jackets and I am quite jealous. Then I headed out on the town and tried to psych myself up to not get lost. While scouting I found Mohammed, and Mohammed was like “what up?” and I was like “just looking for a roof to eat olives on bud” and Mohammed was like “I’ll show you a good roof!” and I was like “k” cause apparently I just follow strangers around now. So off Mohammed and I go, picking up Isabella from Germany along the way, who had just returned from some sort of meditation retreat. Then we climbed a lot of scary stairs and eventually reach a cool roof, where we have some tea* and olives. I watched in awe as Mohammed smoked like ten cigarettes back to back (20dh a pack here = 2 euros = like 3 CAD. Cheaper than gum. Considering picking it up, seems like the thing to do). Then we went to the beach and watched the sunset. On the way we picked up Morhad, another cool individual. Next we found Elias, a teacher of self realization from Berlin (actually. That’s his job title. Wtf is this place even?)
*in morocco you don’t go out for drinks, you go out for tea. Very wholesome, I approve.
So the whole weird crew of us went walking all around the medina, and then went to the market to visit all the chickens that are going to die tomorrow. Then we drank some more tea and Elias led us in a discussion about our own individual journeys to self-realization. So that was enlightening.
Essaouira is not like Marrakech, or any other place actually. It’s like a big ol hippie commune, with hippies from all over the world. I cannot leave my hostel unless I’m prepared to meet like ten different people and discuss the universe, spirituality, personal quests, etc. On my first day here I assumed that I just had to ignore everyone and not engage in order to survive, like I did in Marrakech, but that is not the case. Here you’re free to do all the engaging your little heart desires. In fact, it’s encouraged! You also see the same people over and over, which is fun. What a strange and wild place.
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Gestern haben wir einen Ausflug mit Übernachtung zur Halong-Bucht gemacht, die von der UNESCO zu irgendwas ernannt worden ist. Schon die Fahrt von Hanoi nach Halong… Vietnam ist faszinierend ohne Ende. Es sind gut 160 Kilometer, die wir in einem bequemen Bus zurücklegten. Die Straße ist eine breite, asphaltierte Piste ohne Spuren. Man überholt nach Gutdünken, vorsichtig, entgegen kommende Fahrzeuge fahren ein bisschen zur Seite, ganz entspannt, ohne Aggressivität. Rechts und links Dôrfer und Städte, unzählige Mopeds, endlose, tischebene Reis- und Gemüsefelder. Auf halbem Wege besuchten wir ein großes Geschäft, ich hatte schon so was geahnt. Dann ging es weiter zur weltberühmten Halong-Bucht und wir schifften uns ein - oder wie man das nennt, es war unsere erste Kreuzfahrt. Begrüßungscocktail, feuchter Waschlappen, wie das hier üblich ist. Dann ging die Reise durch die wunderschöne Wasserlandschaft los. Während der Fahrt genossen wir ein sehr leckeres, mehrgängiges Menü und lernten nette Leute kennen. Anschließend landeten wir bei einer riesigen Höhle an und besuchten diese. Oben auf dem Foto seht Ihr, dass ganz schön viele Touristenschiffe unterwegs waren. Unser netter Führer sagte, es seien etwa 100. Man lief also wie in einer Prozession im Schneckentempo durch die Höhle, dennoch war das viele Auf und Ab in der tropischen Hitze ganz schön anstrengend. Anschließend hatten wir auf dem Schiff zehn Minuten Zeit uns umzuziehen, dann ging es an einen kleinen Strand, Wassertemperatur nach meiner Schätzung etwa 30 Grad, ich ging dann raus, weil es mir zu warm war. Am Strand tranken wir Kokosmilch aus einer Kokosnuss. Für mich auch eine Premiere. Zurück auf dem Schiff saßen wir ein wenig auf dem Oberdeck und schlürften einen Cocktail, dann gab es eine Cooking Class, wir machten zusammen Frühlingsrollen. Anschließend gab es Abendessen. Danach stand Squid-Fishing auf dem Programm. Es verlief nicht sehr erfolgreich, weil es um diese Jahreszeit in diesen Gewässern keine Squids/Calamares gibt. Es machte trotzdem viel Spaß, da unsere Mitreisenden eine nette Gruppe waren. Abends um zehn gingen wir noch einmal auf’s Oberdeck, da waren aber schon alle im Bett, denn für heute früh um sechs war Tai Chi im Sonnenaufgang angesetzt. Das Programm hatte eigentlich langsamer ablaufen sollen, aber für heute war ein Taifun angesagt und alle Schiffe mussten um acht Uhr früh im Hafen sein. Unsere erste Nacht auf einem Schiff verbrachten wir gut. Als ich erwachte, regnete es leicht. Ich ging nach oben und bemerkte, dass heftiger Seegang war, das hatte man unten in unserem Zimmer gar nicht bemerkt. Tai Chi war ausgefallen, man durfte gar nicht auf’s Oberdeck. Wie sich die Leute beim Frühstück so vollstopfen konnten ist mir schleierhaft, das Boot schwankte so stark, dass man sich nicht einmal ordentlich einen Kaffee einschenken könnte. Zur Sicherheit aß ich nur eine Banane. Im strömende Regen fuhren wir zurück zum Hafen, auf der Fahrt nach Hanoi, wo wir gegen Mittag ankamen, war es trocken. Jetzt ist es halb elf abends und schüttet seit Stunden wie aus Kübeln. Was wir heute noch interessantes gesehen und erlebt haben, erzähle und zeige ich Dir, lieber Leser, bei nächster Gelegenheit.
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Culinary Gymnastics in the Caribbean
By Annie Wang, Reggie Wilson/Fist and Heel Performance Group Dancer
“They are in training, you know, and like everybody in strict training, they think about food.”
— T.H. White
Dancers are constantly foraging. We are good at constructing meals from multiple sources that both nourish and satisfy. Buying cooked quinoa from the hotel cafe, a boiled egg from the nearby mall, and mixing in walnuts from your own supplies. Knowing that your room’s minibar is really just your personal refrigerator. Learning which of the hotel employees will let you simply use their microwave and which one will make you sign a waiver first. Finding hot water for tea. Making steady progress through a single, large bag of muesli for weeks before hitting pay dirt and finding that the current hotel serves hot milk along with the breakfast coffee—hot cereal as a decadent treat. And in the midst of these culinary gymnastics, we’ve enjoyed learning a little about each country through their food.
I was told that the Kreyol name for Haitian spicy peanut butter, mamba, came from the Congolese word for peanut: muamba. Thick and creamy, troweled onto crisp cassava wafers and paired with the perfect tang of a boiled tamarind, it is a totally different experience than American peanut butter. The staunch nationalism of the Dominican Republic during its combined celebration of both Carnival and Independence Day was on display in the many flags around Santo Domingo, the singing of the national anthem during a Friday night dance party, and in a popular dish called “la bandera”, which parallels the three colors of the flag with rice, beans, and beef.
I learned what mango trees, almond trees, and papaya trees look like. I learned that papaya actually 1. Tastes like something rather than nothing, 2. Contains peppery-flavored seeds, and 3. Is excellent for digestion. I learned that while plantains are universal in the Caribbean, they are “bananes pesées” in Kreyol (“weighted bananas”, I guess because they are pressed flat before cooking), while in Spanish their stage of ripeness is made more explicit: “tostones” when they’re green, “maduro” when they’re ripe. I also learned that chips can be made out of so many more things than just potatoes—far more common have been plantains, yuca (aka cassava), and sweet potato. The plentiful “chinos” in Panama City (which are the Chinese-run equivalents to New York’s bodegas) carried dozens of varieties of these delicious chips right alongside the standard salted plums and pickled eggs that you would find in any U.S. Chinatown grocery.
Speaking of which, everywhere we went there were far larger communities of both Chinese people and Middle Eastern people than I had expected. Not only in the presence of the chinos, but Chinese ingredients were also readily available in the Panamanian fruit market, and in Santiago we happily ate Chinese beef stew, fried rice, plantains, and fried chicken at a takeout place with cheap red lanterns hanging along its awning. Going off of the number of upscale Middle Eastern restaurants in all three countries, I read it as evidence of the generally higher social status of the Middle Eastern population, though I was very tickled to see skewers of Lebanese kibbe sitting next to empanadas in the food carts wheeled around Santo Domingo.
Seafood and starch was another common plate. It might be grilled lobster served next to the Jacmel beach on which it was caught, along with bananes pesées and a giant bowl of “pikliz,” a vinegary, spicy, tongue-numbing salad of shredded cabbage and peppers. In Panama it would be whole fried corvina with maduros or fresh-cut french fries. When we met with a group of the Embera indigenous people of Panama, they presented us with perfectly fried fish filets served on a huge green leaf with a dense stick of steamed white rice on the side. Dominican versions added yuca, fried or mashed into manju, to the standard options of plantains and fries.
And everywhere, everywhere, there were coconuts.
We first spotted coconuts in a Panamanian fruit market - a huge pile of them, brown and scraggly, already divested of their green outer shell. A machete lay at the side for customers to DIY-split their purchase open. We had our first taste of a fresh, still green, coconut on the beach near Jacmel, Haiti, while waiting for our seafood and starch. But in Santo Domingo, stopping by a coconut cart after our last workshop of the day became an unofficial ritual.
For the uninitiated, eating a coconut is a two-step process. At first, the shell around one end is chipped away to form a rough, tapered end whose point is hacked off, creating a mouth-sized opening from which you can drink the water. You then pass the emptied coconut back to the vendor and his machete, who makes a shallow cut into the remaining green shell to form a makeshift scoop before slicing the main body into two halves. You use the scoop to dig out the white flesh inside—if it’s tender enough, you can slurp it like an oyster on the half shell.
Photos: Annie Wang
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montpellier trip 23rd march- 31st 2017
thursday 23rd: we got on the national express coach at about half nine, mine and bea's parents waved us off and we moved to the seats with loads of leg room at the back of the bus. couldn't sleep much as it was really cold and it was very funny when i came back to the toilet to find some random in my seat! Friday 24th: we had breakfast (at 5:30am) and got on the gatwick express which was lovely and warm and i listened to dear evan hansen and slept which was so nice. then we sat around in gatwick airport for a while and i read the grim grotto. me and bea got lunch (at 10:45am) and i had spicy chicken noodle salad. we got on the plane and flew over beaches and the sea to land in montpellier and proceeded to get picked up by violette (told us to call her vi) who took us on a long car journey to her house listening to classical music. she made me a "chocolat" and we had butter biscuits and those pretzel shaped flaky biscuits and bea had orange juice. there were also chocolate covered nuts and sugared kiwi slices and marzipan fruit in a long box. then frédérique arrived and we drove back to her house and she showed us the apartment and our room and we met the colombian girl. i then had a shower and afterwards me and bea found a funny sex ed book which we translated and giggled lots at. for dinner we had an odd perfumed vegetable in tomato sauce and a flaky pastry salmon pie with leek, courgette and cucumber and for pudding we had little homemade chocolate puddings in cases. we all discussed brexit and the far-right and all agreed they were stupid. we gave frédérique her cadeaux and she loved the waitrose bag and all my presents and she gave me and bea each three kisses in the montpellian way. Saturday 25th: in the morning me and bea had coco pops and orange juice and i also had nutella blanc on a tartine things (biscuit toast). frédérique then walked us to accent francais where we met our group and we then walked to the shopping centre and bookshop and the arc de triomphe and saw all the neo-classical buildings and ran in the fountain. me and bea got Apple strudels from a boulangerie in the shopping centre (pentagone) and we also used the make your own orange juice machine in monoprix and bought some petit étudiants. for lunch our group went to a crêparie (the best in montpellier supposedly) and the waitresses pushed together all the outside tables and put on the heaters and we all had crêpes there (i had banane caramel). we then watched a man do a funny show in the square me and bea then went back to the bookshop with many layers, floors and rooms and i bought "culottées" which is a cool BD about cool women. i also bought a notebook and bea bought some books for her and her mum to read. we then walked back home but got very lost on the last corner and ended up walking around the area for about an hour and asking some people in shops but eventually by 7.00 we found our apartment. when we got home we ate fish with bones in and potatoes with vegetables and bread and for pudding we had strawberries in a bowl with nutella blanc and the cornish farings bea brought with her. we then went out with the colombian girl and frédérique to the theatre and as we drove through some tunnels to the little village i said that it's like that scene in intouchables and frédérique agreed. we watched the show which was amazing: the songs were so good and the actress (frédérique's friend) was very talented at playing the violin, guitar, acting and singing. afterwards we ate snacks like crisps and marshmallows and drank apple juice and peach iced tea in the foyer of the cinema and met some of frédérique's friends (many bisous x3) and then we drove home and i facetimed berry and mum as lisa just arrived. now we are going to sleep. Sunday 26th: me and bea got our own breakfast because frédérique's alarm didn't go off, frédérique said she loved my tights and that we dress "trèa anglaise" and then we left the house and walked through sunny quiet morning montpellier. there was no one around and we went inside the church to see a service happening which was nice. we then found a shortcut to the station and got catcalled/yelled at by 2 french men and bea stuck her middle finger up at them once we got on the coach who were waiting for us. our tour guide from accent francais for avignon told us about how much he loves bernie sanders and hates marie le pen "SHE'S A SNAKE!". we spent an hour driving through beautiful sunny french countryside and even drove through rochefort! first we went to le point d'avingon and our tour guide jean-paul played the song on his flute and made us all dance down the bridge! we saw ducks, the beginnings of he alps and a children's playground. afterwards we had lunch in the square of avignon in a little restaurant and there was a marathon going on. i had poulet frites and bea had fish soup (delicacy of the region). we then shopped in some little tourist shops and then went to the pope's palace where i chatted with moneeza and bea about the romanesque architecture. we saw a minion in the town square and also lots of confetti. we drove back on the coach to le point du gard where it was so hot! there were so many little fluffy seeds flying through the air which was beautiful. we walked along the bridge and around the site and jean-paul told us about the history of the bridge in his funny southern french accent "demen maten". we then drove back and i listened to blondie and read the grim grotto. me and bea walked home afterwards and sat on the terrace for a bit because it was still sunny and warm at 7pm! for dinner we ate a quiche that tasted like pasty and some lettuce salad. we drank fig sirop too and for pudding we had l'isle puddings with cornish fairings and fudge which we bought frédérique. after dinner me and bea watched "guess the age" which was a french game show in which the title is self explanatory. i then facetimed berry and lisa and spoke some french with lisa and lent her my pencil case. i then showered and me and bea discussed bea talking in her sleep last night and her alarm making me jump. Monday 27th: me and bea got up a bit earlier and got our breakfast on our own because frédérique went to work; we had some variety cereal packs alongside our usual food. we then left for accent francais and came into the lovely building that is accent francais and met our teacher aurélia. she made us do little introductions and we told her the month we were born and our star sign (there were 4 taurus people including me). we learnt how to faire la bise and how each region has a different number of kisses and also watched a funny english video about la bise. we learnt about stereotypes in france and compared them to some in england and during our 15 minute break me and bea looked in the little record/book/cd/BD store next door to our accent francais building. after our lesson ended we had a little tour of monpellier with jean-paul and some girls from las vegas and new zealand and a boy from switzerland. after our tour me and bea walked back home and on the way we bought smoothies/frozen yoghurt drinks (bea had berries flavour and i had mango flavour) and i watched the man mix the frozen yoghurt with mango sauce and chunks of mango and whizz them all together. it was really hot when we walked back and once we were home we sat outside on the terrace and had a little goûter of petit écolier biscuits and oreo chocolate. i read culottées and bea wrote her diary and bobby the little cat came and sat with us in the sunshine. frédérique brought out some apple and pastry to us and when the sun came in she gave us a red blanket. it was so lovely and warm and bobby was playing with the straw from my drink which was really cute. for dinner we had lobster soup with croutons and bread which was surprisingly really good. we ate with camilla (colombian girl) and frédérique got ready to go out to violette's house for dinner. she kept asking us which shoes and jacket to wear which was funny, and for dessert we had a huge apple pie which was so yummy. we chatted with camilla about disney films and how she was almost a mechanic but chose to be a doctor instead. after dinner she showed us (on her phone with the ute dog case) the trailer of a film about a french girl who sings but her family is deaf. afterwards me and bea read the bee movie fanfic and laughed so so so hard and researched bee anatomy which was hilarious. we then went to bed after i facetimed mum and berry (her and lisa were watching frozen). Tuesday 28th: bea and i woke up at 7:45am and got our usual breakfast and had a slice of apple pie with it. at accent francais (we walked with lila and some other girls half the way) we learnt about boules the game and la famille. we also did a presentation about english traditions in groups (i was with bea and ciaran and we chose guy fawkes night); other groups did cheese-rolling, netball and he royal family. we then got lunch and i went with lila and anna to polygone (the shopping centre) and bought some kind of long pain au chocolat from paul's boulangerie and lila bought a punnet of strawberries from a stall where the last showed us how to wear our bags so we wouldn't get pickpocketed. we ate lunch on the grass next to the fountain dans la place du comédie and bea, rebecca and ciaran got noodles and we all talked about our siblings and cousins. it was so sunny and lovely. we then went to the train station where i bought a 1€ french zine called jealouse and we got the train to nîmes, sitting on the top deck, and met the german garçon "marvin" who was on the tour with us. we walked around all the little streets in nîmes (i bought a chocolate egg for snuff) and saw lots of old roman buildings and gothic style churches, including the bull fighting ring where there are bull fights 3 fois par aneé and concerts/conferences the rest of the time. elena and i applied lots and lots of sun cream together. in our 40 minute break me, lila, rebecca, anna, bea and marvin got crêpes in the square and chatted in the sun about places in england marvin had stayed in. on our walk afterwards we saw men playing boules in the sun under the shade of the trees and jean-paul played a traditional boules song on his flute and tous les hommes joined in singing. we went to some beautiful gardens and on the way back to the train station we walked past a group of street dancing boys who jean paul impersonated by turning his cap backwards and doing funny street dance moves which was hilarious. marvin then played the broken piano in the train station and we got the train back to montpellier. i sat with rebecca, lila and next to anna and we ate fizzy worms and did sex quizzes in anna's cosmo magazine and laughed a lot. me and bea walked home afterwards (got asked by some random dude if we knew where a nearby tattoo parlour was) and once we got back we had a look at some of frédérique's games but then we had to have dinner. for starters we had yummy bread and carrot salad and for mains there was spinich and eggs and potatoes but i just ate the potatoes and bread. i also drank fig sirop with water. after dinner we chatted with frédérique about english vs french sayings eg. "oh my god" vs "oh mon dieu" and "ohlala" vs "wow!" and "yikes!" and also laughed a lot at the way google translate pronounced "sprain" and the way frédérique pronounced it. we then watched "la famille bélier" which was the movie camilla showed us the trailer of. it was so good! we ate peanut butter m&ms and oreo chocolate and all cried a bit at the end of the film when paula leaves her family. i then had a shower and me and bea worked out the timings to go to the cinema tomorrow after lessons. Wednesday 29th: me and bea had our usual breakfast with camilla and we chatted about how emma watson always has the same facial expression. we then walked to accent francais and it was very warm. we learnt about the conditional and and played a game where we had to describe people eg "si j'étais une fleur, je serais..." sl me and ciaran and alex wrote about jean-paul and his clothing habits/knowledge of l'occitane. two groups chose to write about bea, one group chose elena and one group chose me (see below) (also they chose Emma Watson as my celebrity). me, bea and ciaran chose to create a petit jean-paul (P.J.P) for our teleshopping product in the culture part of the lesson. for lunch we got noodles from the taiwanese shop where you choose what you want and watch them cook it in giant woks. we walked to some gardens and i ate with bea, ciaran, lila, rebecca and anna. we sat on the daisy covered grass (even though the signs said not to sit on the grass) in front of the lake with ducks and a turtle in. it was so hot and sunny and relaxing even if there were tons of midgies and me and anna made daisy chain necklaces and crowns. after lunch we visited a little cathedral and had to cover our shoulders and legs but we didn't. we then met jean-paul in the place de la comédie and walked with him to a little local food shop where we tried lavendar shortbread, apple juices with aniseed and other spice flavours and a red peach smoothie thing. i drank lots of glasses because i was very thirsty and had pretty much finished all the water that lila and i went into a restaurant to have our bottles filled up with. after our tasting session, me and bea went and bought our tickets to see la belle et la bête (we got student discount) and then posted her postcards in the post office and sat on the grass by the fountain in the sun for a little while because it was still about 20 degrees celsius. we watched the film in a very cool cinema where the toilets were next to the screen! the film was amazing (me and bea found it absolutely crying-with-laughter hilarious when belle gets knocked to the ground by the beast's snowball but no one else laughed) and so good in french because it's actually set in france! afterwards we kept singing the "gaston" song ("nooooooooo oooonnnnnnnnnnne..... fIGHTS LIKE GASTON") and walked back home. frédérique said we looked "trop mignonnes" and wanted to take pictures of us on the balcony while the sun was out. we then had a dinner of goats cheese on toasted bread with tuna and lettuce salad and then some of the quiche from the other night. for dessert we had strawberries and cornish fairings and some spanish dark chocolate fortune cookie kind of things. on tv they played a few seconds of "chanter les...." from les demoiselles de rochefort which i thought was funny. after dinner me and bea chatted for ages and i packed up my suitcase and we then read the lyrics of "gaston" like a poem which was funny. we talked about how i thought gaston was hot but she didn't. we then went to sleep. Thursday 30th: we had our usual breakfast but without frédérique and then walked to accent francais and had a lesson where we did our teleshopping presentations (we did petit jean-paul) and then learnt about internet and applying the conditional tense and watched/discussed the video for carmen by stromae which is about twitter taking over the world. at lunch we went to paul and i had a gourmandise and one of ciaran's strawberries when we sat on the grass by the fountain. on our way to polygone there was a stall with one super cute goat called britget and two little black pigs called romeo and juliette who were collecting for animal vaccinations and selling cough sweets so we stroked them and they were so fluffy and cute. we then walked to the train station where me and ciraran paid €0.50 to go to the toilet and then walked with bea to the bus station and got on the bus with jean-paul. it was very hot on the bus so i switched to the side with the shade of the coach and put my suncream on and listened to blondie. we then stopped for 10 minutes at some fortress but i stayed in the coach with the driver and closed my eyes. when we got to carmargue (sp?) we straight away got on a tourist boat (i sat with marvin the german guy and bea) and went on a very hot boat trip on the river/canal. we saw lots of cool birds, sweet little houses, boats, bulls and fish and the sun was blasting down on us throughout. we stopped off halfway to watch the bulls being herded by two people on horses and jean-paul said "young people, up here there is a grand view" so we watched from a little hill. we then took the same route back and i chatted with marvin lots about star signs, wearing glasses/contacts, english accents and autres trucs comme ça. when we got back we went into the little town with lots of tourist shops and found a nice cafe in the sun where i sat with bea, marvin, anna, rebecca and eventually lila when she got back from getting her ice cream which was "stingy" (word of the day alongside wet wipe) and didn't even come up past the cone which was hilarious. i had a sirop au lait with menthe flavour (everyone was so confused as to what it was) and bea had a coke and the others had crêpes. we found out that marvin DOESN'T LIKE CHOCOLATE and so we kept asking him stuff like "easter must be a sad time for you" and "what do you eat???" and we all said he is part of the 5% of the world's population that doesn't like it. we then met up with jean-paul and the group and walked on the pier down to the end where people were fishing on the rocks near the lighthouse. we climbed on the rocks and jean-paul told us about everything and then we walked back up to a little beach where lila and bea paddled in the sea and took pictures on bea's camera. anna was shocked to hear that marvin didn't like chocolate and said he was part of the 5% and marvin was like "does everyone in cornwall know this fact? is it something the cornish learn in their schools???" and we talked about eye colour and how mine were green and i was part of the apparent 2% and he looked right into my eyes which was cute. we talked about surfing in england and watersports and he said he wanted to come to cornwall and learn how to surf. we then walked back up to our coach and on the way back i sat behind marvin with lila, anna, rebecca, some other girls and ciaran and we all sang sk8er boy by avril lavine (song of the TRIP) and then complicated and then what the hell all by avril lavine. we also listened to september by earth, wind & fire and papaoutai by stromae (also song of the trip). when we got back me and bea started looking for a tobacco shop because at breaktime alex (only other boy on our trip other than ciaran) told us he bought cigarettes and alcohol in montpellier without getting asked for any ID and had been doing so in france since he was about 14. we found one quite easily that sold alcohol and chose the cheapest wine (€5) and handed it over to the lady at the desk who sold it to us and was like "merci, au revoir!" so me and bea held on tight to the bottle and ran out into the street to give each other a massive high five. WE JUST EXTREMELY EASILY BOUGHT ALCOHOL AGED 16 AND 17!!!!! we were so so so happy then we realised the bottle had a cork in the top so we ran into monoprix to buy a corkscrew opener for €5,50 and some crisps and then we walked home feeling very happy. we sat outside for dinner and had salad with yummy croutons and a courgette pie made with breadcrumbs and some rice too. for dessert we had yoghurt/apple compote (i had fig savour) and we chatted about camilla's family drama ("quelle drâme!") and frédérique's husbands/loves and children/grandchildren. she asked if me and bea had any "petit(e) amoureux(euses) and bea told her about her bf cameron and i said "j'aime les garçons et les filles mais non je n'ai trouvé pas qqn" and she said she is sure i will. we also had those funny dark chocolate fortune cookie type biscuits for dessert and when i held my hands out to have a biscuit she said "ohhh j'aime beaucoup quand tu mets les mains comme ça!" which was sweet. after dinner we did la bise and hugged and said goodbye and thank you and she said we were lovely sweet girls and she's loved having us here. we then sat in our room/on the balcony and ate our crisps (which turned out to be mustard flavour but still yummy) drank our bottle of wine which tasted bad at first but then the more drunk we got the better it tasted. i started off telling bea about how i never really get drunk easily but then when i got up to go to the toilet all my limbs were wobbly and i couldn't walk in a straight line and i realised I GOT PROPERLY DRUNK FOR THE SECOND TIME IN MY LIFE!!! we were rolling around on the floor and laughing so much and it was so funny and great; we couldn't believe that €2,50 worth of cheap french wine (we drank half the bottle each could get us THAT drunk! frédérique came out on her balcony and asked us if we were smoking and we said no but then we realised we were being quite loud so we went back inside and i had a shower whilst still very drunk and then we went to bed after bea told me the story of how her brother cracked his face open when they were little. we then went to sleep. Friday 31st: we got up at 7:45 (i was still a bit drunk and my head was all woozy and i couldn't walk straight) to have our last breakfast and then got our suitcases together and left for the bus stop. we hugged camilla goodbye ("i will say goodbye now because i am late!") and i put our rubbish bag (with our empty wine bottle in) into the rubbish bin opposite our flat. we got the number 7 bus to l'observatoire with our suitcases and saw lots of lycée kids on the way. we got to accent francais a bit late but carried our suitcases up (too) many flights of stairs and after searching lots, put them in a funny room. we then had our last lesson at accent francais and learnt about fashion rules in france (no 3 different colours and only supposed to show 2 out of 3 areas deemed risqué which were chest, legs and butt) and we also learned about different foods. at breaktime me and bea rushed to polygone to go to monoprix for fresh orange juice and buy pastries from paul. we then walked back to accent francais after looking at the farmyard animals again and continued our lesson and at the end they gave us certificates and we all took a big group photo. we then collected our suitcases, got the blue air tram with white birds on, got another packed bus and eventually arrivals at the airport. me, alex and bea sat on the terrace and i wrote this and then we boarded the plane and i read the grim grotto. our flight arrived 35 minutes early so we went into marks & spencer and bought food for dinner (i got a mango pot, coke and a chicken noodle salad) then me and bea sat on the airport floor and ate our mango. we then waited for our coach and imagined what would happen if jean-paul arrived with a "hello young people!" / "hello the cornish! / *flute playing sur le point d'Avignon song*. we then got our coach back to cornwall where i read the grim grotto, listened to the same 4 sufjan stevens songs for an hour and ate my salad. we stopped off for 45 minutes at taunton service station where i sat with ciaran and elenor and a few others and we drank coffee and made jokes about moneeza and becky and i played with elenor's bouncy ball she bought with moneeza's £1 from one of those kiddie machines. we then drove back to cornwall and i listened to the spring awakening obcr and then went to sleep until we reached bodmin where i listened to the whisper of the heart soundtrack until we were back in cornwall and mum picked me up from college.
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knowledge consolidation 1
Sessions 1-6 shall be consolidated within this post.
Nouns:
People-
Mädchen - girl (pl: Mädchen)
Junge - boy (pl. Jungen)
Kind - child (pl. Kinder)
Mann - man (pl: Männer)
Frau - woman (pl: Frauen)
Menschen - humans/people/human beings
Food-
Brot - bread
Wasser - water
Milch - milk
der Apfel - the apple
die Suppe - the soup
das Essen - the food
der Fisch - the fish
Eis - ice/icecream
Pizza - pizza
der Kaffee - the coffee
das Bier - the beer
der Tee - the tea
der Wein - the wine
das Obst - the fruit
die Banane - the banana (pl: die Bananen)
die Orange - the orange (pl: die Orangen)
der Saft - the juice
das Äpfel - the apple (pl: die Äpfel)
Apfelsaft - apple juice
Orangensaft - orange juice
das Fleisch - the meat
der Käse - the cheese
Gemüse - vegetables
die Kartoffel - the potato (pl: die Kartoffeln)
Ei - egg (pl: die Eier)
eine Erdbeere - a strawberry (pl: die Erdbeeren)
der Zucker - the sugar
die Schokolade- the chocolate
der Reis - the rice
das Öl - the oil
das Salz - the salt
Nudeln - pasta/noodles
die Tomaten - the tomatoes
Items-
die Zeitung - the newspaper (pl: die Zeitungen)
das Buch - the book (pl: die Bücher)
Places-
Italien - Italy
Deustchland - Germany
England - England
Frankreich- France
Österreich - Austria
Spanien - Spain
Amerika - America
Bayern - Bavaria
Languages-
Englisch - English (language)
Deutsch - German (language)
Animals-
der Hund - the dog (pl: die Hunde)
die Maus - the mouse (pl: die Mäuse)
der Bär - the bear (pl: die Bären)
die Katze - the cat (pl: die Katzen)
das Tier - the animal (pl: die Tiere)
der Vogel - the bird (pl: die Vögel)
das Pferd - the horse (pl: die Pferde)
die Ente - the duck (pl: die Enten)
das Haustier - the pet; lit: the house-animal
die Kuh - the cow (pl: die Kuhe)
das Schwein - the pig (pl: die Scheweine)
die Spinne - the spider (pl: die Spinnen)
eine Fliege - a fly (pl: die Fliegen)
eine Biene - a bee
ein Insekt - an insect (pl: die Insekten)
der Käfer - the beetle (pl: die Käfer)
die Fische - the fish (plural)
Pronouns:
ich - I
du - you
es - it
er - he
sie - she/they
Sie - formal you
wir - we
ihr - you/you all (/your?)
Particles/Interjections:
und - and
Ja - yes
Nein - no
Adjectives (?*):
genau - exactly
leider - unfortunately/sadly
gut - good/fine/well
süß - sweet
frisch - fresh
Verbs (all in Präsens tense):
‘sein’ (to be): ich bin, du bist, er/sie/es ist, wir sind, ihr seid, sie sind
‘trinken’ (to drink): ich trinke, du trinkst, er/sie/es trinkt, wir trinken, ihr trinkt, sie trinken
‘lesen’ (to read) - ich lese, du liest, er/sie/es liest, wir lesen, ihr lest, sie lesen
‘haben’ - ich habe, du hast, er/sie/es hat, ihr habt, wir haben, sie haben (have)
‘essen’ (to eat) - ich esse, du isst, er/sie/es isst, wir essen, ihr esst, sie essen
‘heißen’ (to be called) - ich heiße, du heißst, er/sie/es heißt, wir heißen
‘kommen’ (to come) - ich komme, du kommst, er/sie/es kommt, ihr kommen, wir kommen, sie kommen
‘sprechen’ (to speak) - ich spreche, du sprichst, er/sie/es spricht, wir sprechen, ihr sprecht, sie sprechen
‘verstehen’ (to understand) - ich verstehe, du verstehst, er/sie/es versteht, wir verstehen, ihr versteht, sie verstehen
‘schmecken’ (to taste) - ich schemecke, du schmeckst, er/sie/es schmeckt, wir schmecken, ihr schmeckt, sie schemecken
‘fressen’ (to eat - animal) - ich fresse, du frisst, er/sie/es frisst, wir fressen, ihr fresst, sie fressen
‘geht’s’ - (does it go) [no further conjugations provided]
Irregulars so far: sein, sprechen, lesen. Maybe also ‘geht’s’ ?
Phrases:
Gern geschehen - you’re welcome
Guten Morgen - good morning
Guten Tag - good day/afternoon
Guren Abend - good evening
Gute Nacht - good night
bitte - please
Willkommen - welcome
auf wiedersehen - goodbye
bis morgen - until tomorrow
bis bald - see you soon
danke - thank you
tschüss - bye
bis später - see you later
Entshuldigung - i am sorry/excuse me
Es tut mir leid - i am sorry
In Ordnung - alright
Keine Ahnung - no idea
mir geht’s gut - I am doing well / I am fine
Wie geht’s - how’s it going?
Alles klar - all right ; do you understand ; is everything ok?
Schon gut - all right
Wie laüfts - how’s it going?
Ich heiße [Name] - I am called [Name] (ß can also be written ‘ss’)
Ich komme aus [Place] - I am from [Place]
haben Hunger - they are hungry; lit: they have hunger
ich habe Durst - i am thristy; lit: i have thirst
das schmeckt gut - that tastes good
Hast du Durst? - are you hungry?; lit: have you hunger?
ist lecker - tastes good (alt: delicious/tasty/yummy)
sind das [Noun]? - are those [nouns]? (sind das= are those)
ich verstehe nicht - I don’t understand
Verb Information:
Verb endings, Präsens:
ich trinke wir trinken
i drink we drink
du trinkst ihr trinkt
you drink you all drink
er/sie/es trinkt sie trinken
he/she/it drinks they drink
So: ich - e, wir - en, du - st, ihr - t, er/sie/es - t, sie - en.
For sentences that answer the questions ‘What do you have?’ or ‘What do you like’, use the accusative case. In this case, only masculine words change form, while neuter and female nouns remain the same. So, der -> den, ein -> einen in the accusative case.
It’s allowable to place the pronoun after the verb. Ex: Trinkst du?: are you drinking?
There is no progressive aspect in German. So ‘ich lese’ can mean both ‘i am reading’ and ‘i read’, depending on the context. If one must specify a verb as continuous/ongoing, follow it with ‘gerade’, meaning ‘just’ or ‘straight’.
Gender Information:
ein/eine - the
die/der/das/den - that/those
Masculine: der, ein
Feminine: die, eine
Neuter: das, ein
Noun Information:
Nouns are combinable in German. When combining words, the gender of the created word will always be whatever the last word in the combined word is. For example: die Orange + der Saft = der Orangensaft.
* Still not sure whether these are adjectives or pieces of phrasal verbs. Either way, they seem to function adjectivally, so I’m leaving them in that category for now.
#y'all are lucky i figured out readmores#this is a big thicc post oops lol#LearningGerman#consolidation 1
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