#badhai do

[deramin2]

"It's time we had queer media do X!"

Babe, I promise you it already exists. Queer media is already doing that. It came out this year. It came out 20 years ago. The only reason you're not aware of it is that queer media always has been mostly indie and people don't watch enough weird indie stuff.

If you only watch queer media made to appeal to a broadly average viewer, of course you're not going to see comedic gay sex, or drag club workplace comedy, or trans men grappling with their interpersonal relationships changing, or romcoms that reject amatanormativity, or 70+ year old lesbian road trips, or Muslim gay coming of age stories, or sham marriage comedies. But these are all in real films and shows.

What's not happening is average straight people paying attention to these wonderful pieces of media, the best films and shows you've ever seen, because they were not made for straight people. They don't talk to straight people, they don't let straight people in on the community jokes and commentary, and they deliberately do things to make straight people uncomfortable. They're more passionate and more messy.

And what you'll almost always get is found family. So if you love that trope there is an entire genre waiting for you to discover.

Off the top of my head that I've watched this year:

Comedic gay sex: Bros (2022), Spoiler Alert (2022), Smiley (2022).

Drag club workplace comedy: Smiley (2022).

Trans men grappling with their interpersonal relationships changing: Rūrangi (2020), Romeos (2011).

Romcoms that reject amatanormativity: Bros (2022), Chutney Popcorn (1999), Badhai Do (2022).

70+ year old lesbian road trips: Cloudburst (2011).

Muslim gay coming of age stories: Naz & Maalik (2016).

Sham marriage comedies: Badhai Do (2022).

[pitrsattabhaadmeinjaa]

crying so hard at the scene where sumi talks to her dad in the shop after being outed, and then again sobbing at the pride parades, and the again at the last scene.

just. god. her and her dad's relationship is so similiar to mine, and god. we will never have that. sobbing on this desk chair rn.

[forkaround]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Original Work Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Original Male Character/Original Male Character Characters: Sundar, Nitin Additional Tags: Uttarayan, Indian festival, First Kiss Series: Part 1 of Indian BL WIPs Summary:

Over the days of preparation for the Indian Festival of Uttarayan, two college aged boys fall in love.

“I like it,” Nitin says, somehow his voice echoes with the fireworks in the open space. “I like it when you smile.” It’s almost disappointing. Sundar curses himself for what he wanted. “I like it when you’re happy. I want you to be happy. Always.” Something big fires off in the distance, followed by cracklings of smaller rockets. Some part of his brain even catches some music. Sundar is moving before he can think, before he can reason, before he can stop himself and let the moment shrink. Something moves Nitin too. He is aware of it as he moves.

[imsogayhelpme]

JUST REALISED THAT THERES NO CONTENT OF BADHAI DO ON AO3

[queer-red-panda]

sumi>>>>

Lesbian/Gay besties

V/S

Dumb and Dumber

V/S

Tom & Jerry duo

Take your pick!!!!

[becomingabeing]

Spell your url with song titles and then tag as many people as there are letters

tagged by @icouldhyperfixatehim and @z-haven my music preferences are all over the place so enjoy (or suffer)

Bandi Tot - Nikita Gandhi, Ankit Tiwari (side note: from the best nonconventional queer family/lavender marriage movie ever)

Ei Obelay - Shironamhin

Complicated - Jeff Satur

Oje Mane Na Mana - Somlata Acharyya

Mighty River - KAWALA

I'm a mess - Omah Lay

Neon - Lykke Li

Ghatey Lagaiya Dinga - Anusheh Anadil

Angels Like You - Miley Cyrus

But I Like It - Lauren Sanderson (my spotify top song last year oops)

Emon Jodi Hoto - JOler gaan

Intersaison - Flavien Berger

Nasa'n Ka, Oh Luna? - MarsMango (gaya sa pelikula ost still slaps)

Good Old-Fashioned Lover Boy - Queen

my url is TOO LONG so, no pressure tags @wildelydawn anyone who wants to do it!

[incorrect-naranjauva-discord]

Flo, to Esper: Look, you may not be interested in men, but I am.

[ishuess]

Since it's pride month. Mentioning a special movie,the first queer movie I ever saw - Shubh Mangal Zyada Saavdhaan. Lot of people thought it was very comedic and didn't introduce homosexuality to mainstream cinema seriously like Badhai Do. But watching it again and again, I realised that was needed. A perfect rom-com to attract audience and then slowly introduce them to this topic. The purpose was to tell people that this community exists and make them weigh their opinions and question. It was not the perfect movie but it was the needed story. Jeetushman or Karman, I remember was the first Indian bl ship I supported. Ayushmann Khurana and Jitendra Kumar, the duo who portrayed their character so perfectly where one was subtle and closeted, other was dramatic out and proud.

Also here's an edit for the movie i found on you tube.

[love-laugh-daydreamarevolt]

I was WAITING for that scene god I was so elated and proud

shardul coming out of the closet out of spite because his family was talking shit about suman was the proudest i have ever felt

[lyricalsakura]

cinematic parallels

Rainbow paints us all

Not Me (The Series) - Thai BL Drama Series

Badhai Do - Bollywood Film

Supreme Court in India shied away from legalising same sex marriage in India. But queer shows in India and Thailand (the country also fights for the same marriage equality) are always vocal about this issue so I could not but stop sharing this

[incorrectmahabharatquotes]

Also, I don't get why these hindutva anons think that India is a queer friendly country. If it was, then why was there a huge outrage and opinions about how sanctity of marriage would change when the matter was in court. Literally, everyone was so bigoted. Made in heaven showed what was the reality in middle-aged queer people communities honestly.

Why was there outrage when Fire was premiered and was opposed by rss and other related groups? Even now, shubh mangal zyada savdhan and badhai do were criticized.

Why our beloved sprinter Dutee Chand was ostracized by her own family and community and critiqued by her own country then?

While our parents are changing, I feel our generation will be better as queer accepting parents rather than older ones. These people are rugsweeping our entire dark past and parts in order to portray that we are superior to others. We aren't. Honestly, no religion is. What matters is how we choose to interpret it. Sorry for the huge rant, and I really appreciate the blog you mods made.

See, the thing is, that they're on a "Hinduism is the supreme religion" kick. Unfortunately, the truth is that no religion is better than any other religion. But to support the falsehood of hindu supremacy they have to close their eyes and deny things that are happening all around them.

These particular anons do care about queer issues and struggles, in their own way I suppose. Some of these people are queer themselves, which is undoubtedly sad. This part of them is in conflict with the part of them that craves to know that they are always correct and right and that their religion and country could do no wrong. To make themselves feel better, they point at Islamic nations that are also horrible at granting queer people and women basic rights. India isn't much better, mind you. But the bare minimum improvement is enough for them to be assuaged in their sense of superiority. Thus, with their beliefs affirmed and their islamophobia stoked, they go on with their lives and parrot their opinions elsewhere.

It must be a painful existence to have two facets of your being in a harsh conflict with each other. Must be confusing to live that way. Regrettably, they can't get out of this mess unless they want to get out.

-Mod S

[grapejuicegay]

Well. Okay. I'm going full clown because it seems the clowniest of my clownery seems to be apt in some way. Like this thought I put in @waitmyturtles' dms at some point during part 2

ft. the scream I promised

Given that there is at least one wedding dress we haven't seen Pear in yet (there are 2 but one for SURE is on set), and given that this shot exists

Well, with how much this show has had to say about queer rights

And about marriage equality, even when they don't say it explicitly

And how much they said about how Kawi's loved ones were unable to help him due to these legal limitations (@waitmyturtles goes into it much better here).... well, what if all of this has been leading up to fulfilling Kawi's original time travel goal. What if, at least legally, Kawi marries Pear. To ensure that somebody can look out for him in case of a medical emergency in the absence of his dad, in the absence of legal protections for queer people.

We had India talking about lavender marriages with Badhai Do last year. Are we going to get the same from Thailand this year?

[starryalpacasstuff]

Hi! I’m also a queer Indian person. I just saw and loved your post on south asian queer media. I realised how many queer shows and movies I just missed because I never heard about them. I have only watched a couple like badhai do and maja ma but not most of the others. Have you watched Chandigarh Kare Aashiqui? I’d love to hear your thoughts on it if you have. I was genuinely surprised they made that movie in 2021 and I never heard anyone talk about it.

I have not, but thank you for the rec anon! I've been receiving so many wonderful recommendations in the past two days, I'm definitely going to have to compile them all

When I do (eventually) watch the show, I'll definitely post about my thoughts! If you'd like, you could let me know what your blog is, so I can tag you in the post. No pressure though!

[forkaround]

lbr this isn't about rights. i don't think either of these countries is lgbt+ friendly by a long shot. Even in India, you have to be in a metropolitan city to have any gay scene, marriage legalization is decades away. That is not what I'm talking about.

What I am curious about is how even under censorship 'queer coded' media is made in China when it is a much stricter, harsher, authoritarian country. While India, the land of unity in diversity doesn't have the same. I'm NOT talking about they-kiss-on-the-lips gay. I'm talking, i guess, essentially what destial did or how Shen Wei waits 10,000 years for Yun lan or ZZS and WKX calling each other soulmates. We don't have those type of things where people can speculate. Not that it's any help but it's about starting a conversation. It's about bringing attention to this. Think how in Kal Ho Na Ho you have Kantaben but it's made by a gay man, he knows what he is doing. And Kantaben's comedy is put in a negative albeit comedic light. (Also one of the song about love 'Kuch to hua hai' has a gay couple kissing. It's only a few seconds, blink and miss it type, but for a movie in India, in 2000's, putting queer love in the same song as the main leads.... )

And it's not like there is 0 queer content ever. But the one that is made, even those that are made with good intentions, somehow aren't quite right, like there is something abstract missing. idk where you are from. If you are Indian, you would know what I'm talking about. Shubh mangal zyada savdha, starring Ayushuman Khurana, came out in 2019, had a gay couple, the story was convincing family members that it's okay that they are gay. But personally, it felt really off. The only thing I can say about why is coz they were straight actors playing a gay role without adding queerness to the acting itself. I'm not talking limp wrist-ing. Something about it, as a queer person, felt inauthentic.

Compare that to Maja Ma, starring Madhuri Dixit, came out 2022, that felt queer. Honestly queer. And Badhai Do had queer characters but it wasn't really honestly queer. And this one I have a hard time explaining, coz I love the movie, it had some amazing scenes that I can't ever complain about, but as a whole, idk...

A lot of the times, there would be queer char to grand stand / represent / gain woke points while the end product misses the mark by just a little. But that could be a personal opinion.

But that's now, pre-censorship, China had BLs. Like BL BLs. China is trying so fucking hard to avoid all of this and pretend that queer people just don't fucking exist. But even they have to give in. Think IQiyi hosting so many queer shows and they haven't left the top 10 list, hell Kinnporsche alone hasn't left top 10. On a platform that is also used by people in Mainland China, the population alone should tell you how many people are watching these shows outside the country since they aren't visible inside it. China understands that pink milk is making money and they are happy to be hypocrites and cash in on it whether through Thai BLs or their own censored bromance BLs. But India isn't. India never has. Is this just a lack of business acummen or lack of future planning in the country?

Just capitalistically, why hasn't India cashed in on this?

Also, I truly believe the second queer media / BLs start making money is the second the rules start to get laxer and laxer until we get marriage equality. Money moves the world, you like it or not. No organization/institution/country is controlled by politics and righteousness alone.

Getting into BL in 2022 makes me think - why not India? Like China is making BLs. CHINA! And before 2016 they were not censored. Yes they were not HEAs and were problematic but they were there. And that is what irks me, I guess. I keep thinking does the audience just not want queer stories, even like the Oscar bait kind. You google this and there is a list of the same 10 books/movies and half of them are non-fiction. So do people just not want it? But that can't be, given how popular BLs are. (Percentage wise it's low but in a population of 1 billion+, even 1% is a million people) Is someone blocking the making of this type of content? Coz like I said, the sheer size of the country's population would justify spending money on this. We've seen some in the last year but even those aren't love stories, they are sad coming out stories.

My gripe with this remains the fact that China made BL and even post censorship they made BLs. Guardian, The Untamed, WoH, etc. While I don't think they will continue making more, these were, like I said, POST censorship BLs. India doesn't have even remotely similar content. And the reason I compare these two countries is there are other variables that are similar. Like India vs USA would not be a fair fight. USA has a different culture. But Asian cultures are overall similar and China also has the same population and they were destitute after the British too. So unlike say, Thailand, which wasn't majorly affected by colonialism, well not as much as the others, India and China have a similar starting point.

[imsogayhelpme]

Just watched Badhai Do... I am feeling THINGS.

[oldtvandcomics]

Happy Queer Media Monday!

Today: Badhai Do (2022) (Title translates to “Give the Good News”)

(The two main characters hiding in a closet, from a promotional poster.)

Badhaai Do is an Indian comedy movie about a gay police officer and a lesbian sports teacher, who get married in hopes of getting their families to stop nagging them about being single. Hijinks ensue, as they both pursue their own romantic relationships on the side, try to keep up the semblance of a good couple, and need to find an explanation about why after a year, they still don’t have any children.

It is a funny movie, that is clearly made with the aim to humanize queer people and champion equal rights, which it is really good at. It also has a very realistic feeling to it. I have no doubt that many queer people have lived, and are still living, this exact same life. It is especially nice that, all in all, it is a happy story. We as a community do tend to have a slight tendency to assume that the only way of being happy is to be 100% out, which is why we really need more stories like this or The Blue Caftan (2022), where gay people in more traditional societies live perfectly happy and fulfilled lives.

Badhaai Do is available on Netflix.

Queer Media Monday is an action I started to talk about some important and/or interesting parts of our queer heritage, that people, especially young people who are only just beginning to discover the wealth of stories out there, should be aware of. Please feel free to join in on the fun and make your own posts about things you personally find important!