#bad arc goes brrrr

[suzannahnatters]

2023 was the year I disappeared down the Asian Drama Sinkhole. This year I found myself struggling with persistent fatigue that made it hard to read books, and absolutely vital to spend large amounts of time just resting and recuperating. Before 2023, in my whole life, I'd watched 3 dramas from start to end. In 2023 I consumed over 25. And I had so much fun that I've found it very difficult to interest myself in watching anything else.

I'm content with this use of my time because it's been a wonderful way to work on my long-form storytelling skills - time spent watching stuff as an author is never totally wasted. But the West makes television too, and I've spent my whole life being completely indifferent to it. All year I've been asking myself why I find Asian drama SO addictive and SO much fun compared with Western TV, which so often feels disappointing or a chore. After some thought, I've boiled it down to five basic reasons.

Structure. Asian dramas may vary in length anywhere from 10 to 70 episodes, but the vast majority of them have a discrete, self-contained story to tell. You get one season of a show, and once it's over, the story is complete. My biggest peeve with Western TV has always been the insistence on dragging a story out over multiple seasons of declining quality. The story never wraps up in a satisfying way; it just gets flogged to death. In recent years Western TV has compounded the problem by cancelling shows before their original story arc is even complete. With Asian drama, you don't have to worry about that. At least you always know you'll be getting a complete story.

Standalones. Related is the fact that Asian drama has resisted the urge to create vast IP story worlds like Star Wars or Marvel. This doesn't mean their storytelling isn't derivative - just that instead of trying to tell new stories with old characters, they're more likely to tell the same stories with new characters, which I honestly think is a more natural and creative way to do it. In an age of endless IPs, reboots, remakes, and retellings, Asian drama is making hundreds of new and unconnected stories. While many of these are adaptations of webtoons and novels, of course, to a Western newcomer the sense of novelty and variety is absolutely intoxicating.

Settings. Asian drama focuses on Asian affairs, history, and folklore. Western TV focuses on American affairs and sometimes English history; whenever it ventures beyond these limited interests it usually stereotypes them. It's not that Asian drama doesn't also have these pitfalls, but the part of me that wants to learn about the world beyond the English-speaking bits goes brrrr when it sees an Asian drama. I've long adored some limited examples of the wuxia genre in Chinese film, but now on top of that, I'm also getting Chinese xianxia and Korean sageuk and Thai romantic comedies and all the happy learning parts of my brain are lit up like a Christmas tree.

Relationships and Characters. Asian drama has a big, swoony, unapologetic focus on romance. Not all kdrama/cdrama relationships work for me, of course - wanting to stab the male lead is an occupational hazard - but Asian drama is interested in romance at a level that simply doesn't seem to exist anymore in Western media. Related to this is an emphasis on relationships of every sort - romantic, familial, platonic - and detailed, lovable character work to support them. My best guess for why Western media falls short in this area is that for decades it has been sacrificed on the altar of Joseph Campbell's Hero's Journey, which sees romance and relationships as an obstacle to the hero which must be shed in order for him to achieve his goal. I'm deeply happy to have found a whole part of the world that chose to disregard this fatheaded notion.

Content. Naturally I must preface this by saying that many Asian countries do contain content that is VERY BAD and potentially triggering. Ageism, classism, lookism and sexism are all deeply engrained into Asian drama to the point that if one day I conceive a violent disgust for them this will probably be why. But that's a topic for another day. Where this benefits me, personally, is that Asian dramas don't usually push the envelope when it comes to explicit content. While the presence of such content doesn't rule out a watch for me, it does make it stressful. I just want to relax when I'm watching TV, and I don't find pervasive language, sex, or gore to be relaxing. When Western shows get an MA15+ rating, they usually go all in with that stuff, but Asian drama doesn't seem to have that urge. Explicit violence HAS kept me from watching some highly acclaimed dramas (MOVING is one example) but the vast majority of them, even when they do contain limited amounts of gore or language that get them higher ratings on Western platforms, usually keep such things brief. They are generally demure sexually, and you'll almost always find sexuality being expressed within the context of marriage (even when it's premarital) which is something that as a Christian I do find restful. Again: this is all happening within a cultural framework that ALSO contains disgusting and triggering stuff, even in the better dramas. Personally, I can stomach the insidious stuff a lot better than I can take the in-your-face explicitness of Western TV, and I'm particularly grateful for the blend of demure sexuality with a strong focus on romance: it's taught me a huge amount about creating romantic tension that goes beyond sexual tension. So there are my five completely honest and personal reasons why I've found Asian dramas to be so fun and restorative this year! One day I might write a post on the things I DON'T like about Asian dramas - but I am lazy, and I am still having fun and finding out what I do or don't like, so maybe that can wait for next year. In the meantime, feel free to hit me up for recs!

[albino-whumpee]

Wired Shut

Fixing the bad arc to be even worse because I forgot to mention things about his torture methods. Hope you like this!

Taglist: Ask to be added or taken off it!

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CW// dubcon body modification, slavery, pet whump, mentions of past torture, sadistic whumper, dislocation, dehumanization, conditioning, forced mutism, broken whumpee, hallucinations, mental torture games, shackled, suicidal ideation, captivity, teeth whump ptsd, sound torture, trauma response to darkness  Ask to tag!

He shouldn’t have said a thing. He was supposed to stay quiet while his Master played with him, but after a while the pain was too big to bear. The pet had thought it would be okay to use the extra minutes his Master had given him for staying quiet for two weeks straight, to beg him to stop.

His Master was very kind. He let him choose what would break next. What bone he would dislocate and put back in place sometime later. Like he had done before, when his hands were wrapped in bandages but his blood still dripped down the wall. 

Slowly, the pet began to wonder when that would happen when his master got bored of him. 

He knew the answer, but the fear about the method made no words come up during the long, silent moments when his master wasn't doing anything to him. As time went on, slowly, like a broken pipe filling a glass, drips of memories of another time came back to him. 

The glass, however, was too broken to hold them long enough to fill it back. Every night spent inside the darkness of a box cracking it just a little more. Until the pet cried no more as the fists blew on him. No emotions on his face until his master took him back to the box. 

The mere sight of it was enough to make the pet claw at his master. In the beginning, no matter how painful the shocks were, he would speak. He would beg and cry to escape being in the box even one more minute. But his pleas fell on deaf ears every time, shut out of his master´s mind as the box was sealed and locked with no knowing of when it would open again. 

Inside the darkness, his nails wore the wood away, until the wood was smooth and stained with dried blood. 

Once he was finally outside, he would become more obedient, more silent. Slowly, to avoid the inevitable terror of the box, his mind slipped away. Only waking back up once he was out and his fingers red and sticky. 

It was not something the pet could control, but was enormously grateful it happened. However, his master quickly took notice of his taciturn look, the way he swayed and his eyes lost their shine as he pushed him inside the box. So when he was slipping into that blissful haze, suddenly, the screech of music too loud to take in blasted from every direction in the dark box. It was impossible to muffle, and oh he tried. 

Once the music was put off and his ears rang too loud to hear his master's orders, he hoped his master would get bored of him soon. Hopefully, it would take his master´s sadness with him.

Beautiful red patterns had already faded into the skin. Healing into white, voluminous scars all over his body. Despite having thought it pretty once, when a sense of shameful pride invaded him when his master told him he had made them, once the memories of the table came back, he couldn´t help but scratch a bit rougher when it itched. His master joked often about covering what little patches of skin were left untouched with more of his designs, but the pet wasn´t sure he would be able to even if he wanted to when his hands still hurt below the bandages long after being hung from the wall.

One day, his master gave him a choice when commanded to sit on the sofa, something he did as his stomach twisted inside him. 

Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. 

Your place is on the ground. 

But it was his master's orders…but his master often ordered him things that went against his rules. If he disobeyed, he would get punished…but then again, even when he obeyed, he would get punished anyway.

Resigned, the pet sat on the edge of the sofa.

The person taking out their tools next to it greeted it like a normal human. Despite the pet´s confusion, he graciously slipped to his knees. Exactly how his Master had taught it to greet. Bent on the ground and not allowed to move until someone touched his head.

The woman looked conflicted as she put a delicate hand on its head. Kindly lifting his face with the tips of her fingers before she grabbed the arm that didn’t ache and pulled him back up on the sofa.

“Mouth or arm?” Its Master repeated his question, annoyed. His master had gotten mad about something lately, but his memory didn't need to be perfect to know it was the pet´s fault. 

Every beating, his master would make sure he knew he deserved it because of what he did, after all. 

The names he would recite when he retold his sins, injecting another shot of blazing, white hot pain as the memories rushed back to his head, incomplete and fractured in a way he couldn't tie everything together to make sense or put a face on them. From the names he remembered, he knew there was one that ignited anger and grief just as much as guilt and longing. 

Everything that happened to him was his fault. As well as what happened to those people and his master. He had no right to blame, so he took it all, quietly.

It was his fault.

Talking wasn't allowed, so he felt proud when he pointed his mouth. Maybe it would prove to his master he would be quiet. That it could be good.

So when his Master smiled and the woman dragged out a long sigh, he was pulled down into the seat and ordered to relax. Doing as ordered finally came with a reward. 

“Sorry. I’m sorry, darling. You’re doing well. Stay like that” the kind woman whispered as she worked. Not giving him more pain than necessary.

When she put the glue over his teeth, when he felt it harden and then a metal structure was gently put between them and his lips. When it couldn’t hold its lips open wide enough and a silicone object was shoved inside its mouth to prevent that, he scrunched his eyes as the wires were tightened around his, tying its jaw locked. Preventing him indefinitely from opening his mouth to do stupid things a pet shouldn’t do. Like talking or begging.

When the woman was done she gave him something. Discreetly, away from its Master’s eyes. His eyes had never made the world very clear, but a different kind of fog covered his sight when he saw it said” numbing cream” on the package. Careful to not let it be found out, he bent down on the floor again as goodbye while his Master showed her the way outside.

The pet quietly sat on the stairs now, dragging his aching legs closer to his chest. He hoped his Master would take a while. Guilt being lower than the relief of being alone for a second.

So when that guy, the freckled guy with a nice smile, came to talk with him, he moved his hands as much as the pain allowed.

He didn’t know how his master didn’t seem to know he lived with them if he always stood close. Sometimes even comforted him when the pain was too much at night in his crate.

“What happened to your mouth?” The man signed. His throat was covered with a muted green scarf.

“Fixed it” the albino signed back showing his teeth with the metal structure. Hands shaking slightly with the strain “so I won’t be a nuisance to Master anymore” it said.

“And how are you gonna eat?” The man signed with a frown on his face. Always so worried about him…he liked him. He was always very nice and he seemed to know him before he belonged to his Master. He wondered since when… How had they met?

“It will be fine. Master won’t let me starve…for too long” he smiled pulling a hand to his mouth and soothing it with his fingertips at a sudden bolt of pain “She was nice enough to give me this” he showed the cream and rubbed it over his gums. “It won’t hurt in a bit,” he said, putting it away. Hiding it on his shorts waistband.

The freckled man stared at the hall in front of them. Reflecting something before he said “He's making time. All of it hurts just enough, and stops right before the worst… you know it don’t you?” He kept his hands above his knobby knees. At least he could somehow walk now. The freckled man put a hand over his head and softly passed his fingers through his hair “Stay alive ok? You can´t die here” he said, before lifting himself up and kissing his forehead “I will come back for you” he signed before disappearing after turning a corner, opposite from where his Master popped out from.

His Master called him to his side and in a second, he was down on his knees before him and looking up. A rough hand passed over his lips before a thumb shoved his lips open. A fond smile appeared at the flash of metal on his mouth. 

“You won’t need this anymore then” he said as he gently passed his hands to his neck to unbuckle the shock collar. With a swift pull, his master put it in his pocket as he ordered him to follow him back to the basement. He fastened the shackle on his ankle and stroked his cheek tenderly, before leaving.

It was freeing.

It had been the right choice.

Or so it seemed before the man took the small lamp that had been the barrier preventing him from screaming in panic as the dark engulfed him in the cold basement.

He could scream all he wanted now, but there were heavier shackles than the tiny metal wires on his mouth preventing him from doing so. 

Jerking his jaw and shaking violently, he crawled to the far back of the crate and curled into himself. Wrapping his arms around the mucky pillow, helplessly begging his Master to please bring back the light before he saw the freckled man with a dim light on his hands.

He put it down right before the crate and with awfully worried eyes, he pulled himself inside the crate. The pitiful pet flinched when he got too close, but when the freckled man stayed right there, sitting with knees so close to his chest because of the small space, the pet shyly scooted closer. Feeling its heart pounder on its ears and its face wet with tears when the freckled man passed an arm around it and pulled the blanket over its shoulders, letting him bury his face on his shoulder. Thumbs doing little circles over its transparent clothes. Allowing his heart to still, ease, as he put the light on his hands.

A dream so sweet, his mind refused to believe in reality he was only crying against the cold wall of his crate, holding the pillow like his life depended on it, clenching the ripped blanket around his shoudlers for safety, nobody could see it in such darkness.

[enneamage]

this is random but regarding dsmp characters being an expression of their irl complexes, what did you make of wilburs finale? particularly the thing about lmanberg being tommy, i cant tell whether this is a retcon he made to distance his character from himself and his attitude towards achievement, or if it was always about possessiveness. im thinking its a mix of the two since iirc in a hey and stuff ep he describes his character as having a twisted idea of what constitutes possession and achievement. also what do you make of him leaving tommy lol

Okay so this got more poetry-y than I usually get on here but metaphor brain went brrrr so I decided to use it.  

Starting with the meta of the story, Wilbur logged onto the DSMP wanting to roleplay Breaking Bad—he was always going to be the asshole that let the younger, more tormented junior asshole flourish and shine as an acting talent. I’ve always had the abstract mental image of him gifting Tommy his corpse because his broad intentions always leaned towards tragedy and setting himself on fire to give Tommy some drama to work with. This is in line with his talent manager streak and their already established dynamic at the time.

And then we get to Wilbur’s compulsive self-disclosure and his inability to suppress his ‘quirks.’ It’s a little bit more than that actually, he says he ‘based his character’ on the self-destructive behavior of historical political figures, but I would bet that’s mostly because he sees parts of himself in them. I think he looks for chances to explore his behaviors and his limits in a semi-contained environment, or at least ones with plausible deniability that he can walk away from at the end of the day.

How you spend your time is how you spend your life, and for a while the DSMP was more or less populated by the CCs living this story. It’s hard to suppress your nature for that long, especially if you’ve already got behaviors that you don’t have much control over to begin with. What he does have is a kind of meta-dissociation, a distant running inventory of the technicalities of a situation that let him sound like he’s in control because he can describe them and shape them to an extent. In the end he was at the mercy of what felt right for his character, which turned out to be a masterclass in the ways your unconscious can tell on you.   

Now for the loreposting bit--

“L’manburg is Tommy” was a good cover-up job for the Man vs Self aspects of his story. Doing it for love™️ means it wasn’t purely selfish, that his actions were grounded and part of the world instead of an indecipherable war he was waging against himself with living collateral. If you step back even his explanation gets creepy, it’s very “if I can’t have this no-one can,” and what does that say about Tommy?

I think there were times, if not the majority of time, where C!Wilbur related to Tommy as an extension of himself that he had rights to hurt and control. Tommy was his audience and as long as he could drag him around he could exist in the way he needed. Tommy was an incredible confidence boost to C!Wilbur, and was blissfully oblivious to how much C!Wilbur needed him to even begin to feel okay about himself. (C!Wilbur would insult and degrade him to deny this because it made him unbearably vulnerable and gave his power away.) C!Wilbur being technically in charge obscured how much of the actual practical effectiveness of the pair was Tommy, the battery in the machine, but some part of Wilbur knew and it drove him crazy with inferiority. When Tommy started to lose faith in Wilbur, that really was a big turning point, but it was a smaller part of a bigger problem.

I’m with you on the two stories not being mutually exclusive, because their relationship is buried deep in the bones of that arc, but the part of L’manburg that was Tommy in the sentimental way was the part of his heart that comes and goes, the bit that gets drowned out when he can’t hear it over the sound of his own ego fighting with itself. He can only find it once the forest fire dies down again, so it’s predisposed to show up as a lingering guilt.

Those two had to be separated. The ending wasn’t really ‘emotionally satisfying’ but the point that was being solidified was that C!Wilbur hasn’t changed, and maybe can’t change, so he was brutal to Tommy until the end. I’ve wondered before if there was purposeful passive-aggression in the way CC!Wilbur refuses to improve C!Wilbur or demonstrates a string of failures where the development doesn’t stick-- “I suffer being like this, and I’m stuck this way, so I’m not going to give you a happy ending where I’ll never get one.”

Wilbur dragged Tommy along until the very end because giving him closure would make it easier for Tommy to leave, and he couldn’t tolerate that. The “I have to leave if you don’t forgive me” thing was a convoluted tick in the narrative that didn’t really make sense except for putting the power back in Wilbur’s hands as the abandon-er. I feel like that had to be CC!Wilbur’s brain child because suddenly insisting that he has to obey his own rules after all this time made no damn sense. He knew that Tommy would stick around until the last moment as long as he kept him on the hook, so he did it on purpose.

C!Wilbur left as he arrived—he was  a con man. The Utah thing was ridiculous in execution but it did what it was meant to do, whatever nationalist shpiel he was using to justify not letting Americans into L’manburg was out the window, revealing that he was always deceptive at his core. L’manburg was a power fantasy made possible by Tommy, but he couldn’t keep it, so he set it all on fire to feel powerful again, and to punish himself, and to feel powerful through punishing himself.

In the end he couldn’t stay because he couldn’t control his image anymore. The idea of being forced to live with who he’s been and what he’s done without being able to make new impressions on new people was intolerable, so he left to make a new story somewhere else. I know I’m a broken record but this is literally the final stage of the fantasy cycle, when the walls come down and there’s nobody left to believe anymore, so he runs away.

[anonymousgeekhere]

What’s your opinion on the iliad cast? Gods and mortals

Mortals/Demigods:

Hector: I think my thoughts on him are obvious lol. My true love (after Apollo) he’s just so good! Hehe not gonna go in detail it will be long

Paris: Originally wasnt a very big fan of him but after learning more about him (and his effeminate aspect), I have mixed feelings. Like I like him but some stuff he does is like

Aeneas: We didn’t see him for much, I was intrigued by his fate thing, then I read the Aeneid and now I’m sick of him

Sarpedon: I’m more interested in the impact than him cuz like. Zeus contemplating saving him which would go against Fate? Very interesting…

Achilles: So I like him as a character not a person. I think his story and arc is very intriguing but like. he killed and mutilated a child. In the kid’s dad’s temple. like. Much as I find his arc about shifting between divine and beast and ultimately realizing he’s human and cannot reject society interesting af I just cannot like him

Patroclus: Wish there was more about him! He seemed very interesting and strong, not the uwu kawaii boy I thought he was

Odysseus: Yoooo I fucking love this guy he’s so funny and clever let’s fucking gooo

Diomedes: On his own I dont care for him much, tho I feel bad about how Athena manipulated him he’s pretty great when he teams up with Odysseus, book 10 was wicked awesome

Aias: Stronk man goes brrrr

Menelaus: Really cool guy, wanna see more content about him cuz he seems so conflicted and betrayed aww

Agamemnon: Someone shoot him. Please

Helen: FUCKING QUEEN I already loved her and then I found out more about her and aaaaah she’s so good

Andromache: Aaaahhh I love her she deserved so much better

Cassandra: Would’ve loved to see more of her, her story is interesting

Penelope (I know she‘s from the odyssey but shhhh): YO SHES A QUEEN TOO she really outsmarted Odysseus she and him are OTP how she so big brain

Hecuba: She won me over when she begged Hector not to go fight Achilles

Priam: Interesting guy, wanna know more about him and why he seems to only care for Hector (trauma response after losing so many kids?)

Gods:

Apollo: I won’t dump here cuz you all know about that already. I really enjoyed seeing a darker, more divine aspect of Apollo. Really changed my perspective on him (which is an essay in of itself) and appreciate him a lot more and see him as more nuanced and complex

Artemis: We didn’t see much of her! But I can’t believe she got bitch slapped by Hera

Leto: So badass omfg

Hermes: Really pleasantly surprised by how kind he was to Priam. Loved seeing him as the “kind god”

Zeus: I’ve softened to him and really like to see how his position as a king makes him have to take harsh decisions. Fate makes me wonder how much control he really has

Hera: Badassssss. I really loved seeing her so manipulative and clever, it was really fun

Ares: I hate how Homer wrote him! Made him seem so pathetic and had everyone bully him

Athena: Ngl especially after writing my essay I don’t really like Athena? She’s manipulative but not in the fun Hera way

Aphrodite: My opinion on her dropped a little because of that one scene in book 3 where she forces Helen to sleep with Paris

Poseidon: He’s much more serious and scary than I thought, really awed by his sheer power

Hephaestus: Hate how everyone bullies him but damn does he make some cool stuff

Thetis: She’s such a good mom??? I wanna know more about her, like how she ended up married to Peleus

[nibeul]

Please I want to know more about your clones 🤔🤔

I am so late to responding to this but GLADLY!! I love gushing about them though I have so many (like 50 I think) so I will try to stick to my main group ahh :)

Cross (he/him): Cross was my first clone OC ever, so he holds a very special place in my heart even if I do not draw him often enough. He’s a commander (CC-0044) and was present on Geonosis, though later returned to Kamino to help Alpha with the CC training program.

He got his scar in 21BBY and it’s actually not from the battlefield (none of his scars are actually from the battlefield). The scar comes from being whipped by a lightsaber hilt, which sounds funny out of context, but it wasn’t an accident.

He’s batchmates with @katanrocksketches ‘s OC Asch! The two were pretty close when they were in training, and Cross got his name before leaving Kamino. It was given to him because of his kind of uhhh, “cross nature” or disposition pfft. He softens up a bit between 22BBY-20BBY though the walls go up again after that :’)

Coming off Kamino, he was a stickler for rules and was not a big fan of clones tattooing themselves/dying their hair and whatnot (he didn’t even like having a name at first though his batchmates used it enough that it begrudgingly stuck). After meeting Sunny though, he lets him do one tattoo and ends up getting his number underneath his left eye. It is like, staying to how he believes they should be while also accepting that it’s ok to be individual.

Cross’s favorite color is red because for him, red represents Ando (my Padawan OC) and they are very close (NOT IN A ROMANTIC WAY. He sees Ando as his little brother or kih’vod to protect).

Cross actually does not know a lot of Mando’a because of his belief that they should not try to be seen as individuals. He distanced himself from anything that he considered “individualization”, and Mando’a was included in that. Sunny teaches him a little bit later down the line, and Ando also teaches him and Ten (another clone OC of mine) some Togruti, too

Part of Cross’s strict disposition comes from being subject to Priest’s death circles on more than one occasion (I might retcon that to Adral—a mando OC of mine—because I hate KT Ugh).

By the end of the war, he carries a lot of guilt. He loses a lot of the people he’s closest to because of his actions/orders, and he uh. Doesn’t live past O66 :’) he does get a very quick.. redemption.. arc.. kinda..

Sunny (he/him): Sunny was my second clone OC made around the same time as Cross, and he also holds a very special place in my heart :) I really love clone medics, there is just something about them that makes my brain go brrrr. I also think the irony of his name is great

Sunny’s name was originally Sers, but after writing him for a few weeks, I changed it because I thought Sunny fit better. His name was given to him by his batchmate, Aran, and while he vehemently protested against it, the name ended up sticking. He won’t admit that he actually likes it (though the tattoo and painting of his armor say otherwise anyway)

Sunny is the CMO of the 409th Corps (my OC military group basically). He’s a Lieutenant (or at a rank around there, definitely a CO at the least) and he does not back down. Ever. Even the people who outrank him will fall into line if he tells them to, Jedi included. He is not afraid to pull rank as a Medic, and his resting bitch face can be very scary

On the same line of thought as the rbf, he is basically perpetually scowling. He does not look approachable at all

Sunny loses the entirety of his batch on Geonosis, including Aran who he holds onto while he is dying. The Jedi leading Sunny’s company was.. not accustomed to war and failed to adapt when it was needed. Because of this, Sunny doesn’t necessarily harbor a dislike of Jedi, though he does not really trust many of them in leading positions. He also does not like that there are kids being put in the role of commander, he does see many Padawan deaths (he later comforts a dying Padawan that he was close to, I think I wrote part of that scene for myself and it was kinda upsetting oof) —> he gets his tattoo/paints his armor in order to honor his dead batchmates

Throughout the war, Sunny gets seriously injured only once after going down in an LAAT (where he nearly ends up dying too). Boost finds him, though he’s kinda accepted that he’s not gonna make it (I mean he does but it doesn’t look like he will for a bit). After Flip (younger clone OC) dies, he doesn’t really care if he kicks the bucket either :’)

Sunny is the only one out of my main gang to make it past O66. His chip doesn’t work at all, though he has to fight through his brothers (aha, the only ones who are still alive that he is close with) in order to save a Jedi youngling that was in the medbay at the time. After that, he goes on the run with the kid (clone dad clone dad) and offers his services as a doctor in the outer rim in order to keep them afloat

Boost (he/him) (she/her) [either or, there is no real preference]: Boost has gone through a lot of changes design wise. He started out as Dax, but then Dax became another OC, then she was Boost, though she had kinda short hair that was pushed back by a headband, then his hair was buzzed, and now we are finally at long hair Boost. Idk how to describe, but she is very shaped I think

Boost for his nickname from bear hugging his batchmates and lifting them off the ground when doing so. Also from fucking around in training where he threw another one of his batchmates in order to get from one ledge to another. All around just a name with silly origins that she liked and decided to keep

Boost and Sol are batchmates!

Boost is very tactically intelligent. She’s good at thinking on her feet, sees the bigger picture before focusing on details, good problem solver, etc. He is an ARC after all, there is good reason for his status and rank as a Lieutenant. That being said, he can also be very very stupid in the sense that off the battlefield, he’s oblivious. He does enjoy being the jokester of the group, and he sometimes plays up his dumbassery for jest, though yeah, a lot of people assume that he is not smart because of his demeanor which is very wrong

Boost is terrible. Terrible at braiding her hair. Sol is the best at braiding it, though she would never admit that even if everyone knows it. He started growing his hair out once they were off Kamino and hasn’t stopped since despite the fact that is technically not within regulations. Cross turns a blind eye and Ko (Jedi General) could not care less for inconsequential regulations like that

Boost is really good with kids, but good in the way a uhh.. chaotic uncle/auntie is. He’s a lot of fun to be around with, and being around kids makes him even more rambunctious than usual. He can be what is considered “childish”, pulling pranks and everything but like, he is very emotionally mature and knows when to be serious. Again, a lot of people kinda just boil her down to “dumb” which is really wrong, though it doesn’t bug him a lot.

Boost has a big sweet tooth!! He loves getting sweets when they’re on Coruscant, which they actually tend to visit frequently enough because of Ko’s status as a Sentinel (and also because Ko benefits what the Republic sees as the “propaganda machine” as a prominent General with a good track record).

Boost is romantically involved with @buttsalsa ‘s civilian OC Esta. I reblogged some art of them the other day, they are very cute :D

Boost doesn’t make it to Order 66 :’) I actually wrote out his death and cried after going back to read it LMAO It was rough

Sol (he/him): Sol was made as a package deal with Boost, and I feel bad because I think he gets overshadowed a lot but he is kinda like the rock for the group. When he dies, things really start to crumble but uh!! That is a sad thought for another time. Anyways, like I said, he is basically the rock and also a voice of reason for Boost’s shenanigans

Sol got his nickname after reading through some flimsi that their trainer had given him. He didn’t know if it had any meaning, but he liked the way it sounded and immediately began using it. Boost quickly picked up on it and the rest of their batch was very supportive

Sol loves reading. He specifically likes reading history, and Ando slips him what he can (fun fact, when Sol dies, Boost returns to their bunk to find a couple of holobooks that Ando had left and breaks down aha.. pain). Whenever he doesn’t feel like keeping Boost from causing trouble, he just sits in a quiet corner and reads his books while everything erupts in chaos around him

Sol’s favorite beverage is tea which Ko introduced him to. He has a few boxes he keeps with him when he can, and he shares them with Boost sometimes though he has to add a lot of sugar/honey in order to do that. If he could drink tea all the time, he could. On the flipside, he absolutely loathes coffee and doesn’t understand how Sunny can drink multiple cups on a day

Sol is kinda like the person that everyone is friends with even if they don’t realize it. He’s like.. the perfect emotional pillar, kinda the therapist friend in a group that desperately needs therapy. He’s more of a listener than a talker which is why it’s easy to overlook him, but he insists that he doesn’t mind much. That being said, it’s only once he’s gone that people start to realize just how much he did (aside from Boost who already thought the world of him)

Sol is also an ARC trooper, having gone through the training program together with Boost. He doesn’t have the same tactical knowledge that Boost does, but he’s good at mediating, long range combat, and also working through plans (he’s pretty meticulous). He and Boost balance each other out well, since he is like the “slow and steady” one out of them.

Sol is the first to go out of the main four (second out of my bigger group of six). He and his entire platoon are wiped out in a massacre as a result of false intel.. man :’)

Anyways, thank you for enabling to ramble about my ocs ToT I honestly just needed to infodump shdjf

[technicallyaminecraftsimp]

*kicks down door* HEY IM BACK I BROUGHT THE PLAYLIST THING IT TOOK A WHILE THERE WERE MORE SONGS THEN I REALIZED :D

Okie dokie, and now I present: All the songs on my c!Tommy Spotify playlist and an explanation of why I connected it to c!Tommy

Just Take My Wallet ~ Jack Stauber - I think this is one of the only songs I have on here that, like everyone already is aware of. The main part of this song focused on is the line “what’s the kindest way to say, you took away my friend, my buddy” relating to how tommy cares so much about Tubbo, and vice versa. The first example I can think of is when techno, someone tommy trusted and was close to, executed Tubbo. It can also be used for Tubbo, and how recently tommy was killed

Sweet Hibiscus Tea ~ Penelope Scott - so remember when ppl were going crazy going stupid bout Rät? Well, listening to that got me to listen to this song and instantly when I heard it, I thought of c!Tommy. Mainly the line “I am not your protagonist, I’m not even my own” can kind of relate to how tommy never wanted to be the hero. He was placed into this hero role involuntarily.

Car Radio ~ Twenty One Pilots - this one might be a bit of projecting oops- but whenever I listened to this song, I related to it because I like to listen to music to distract or calm down. I guess I can kinda see c!Tommy in a similar way. He had to give his music discs up, and for a while lost that memory of listening to them after sweet moments, he lost that escape he could use. And because of that, in the time without the discs, he just has to face his trauma and all that’s happened to him. Most of this is projecting whoops /hj

Change Your Mind ~ Steven Universe - Hghhhgh I’ve been wanting to talk about this one specifically for a looong time. This song is a short one, but I do think it relates to c!Tommy after doomsday and maybe after the prison arc. Sort of like a post-healing arc song. Mainly directed towards Techno and Phil. “I don’t need you to respect me, I respect me” y’all, respect was a big thing between techno and tommy. That whole Axe of Peace thing? And how after the community house discourse, techno told tommy “you’re not worthy of that axe.” And then “I don’t need you to love me, I love me” this might seem a bit like Dadza, but dad or not, Phil didn’t really give much care for tommy. “But I want you to know you could know me, if you change your mind” I’m just saying, the people who’ve come to be close w c!Tommy are ppl who’ve taken the time to know him, and they don’t fight against him because of different opinions. And maybe it’s me missing Bedrock boys, but techno and tommy could become close once again, if they take the time to repair the crack between them and communicate.

Dear Mom ~ Beetlejuice - listen to this, just listen to this and tell me this doesn’t scream Tommy missing Wilbur. Sometime between the end of the Manburg war and before the prison arc, this song fits. The chance of Wilbur being revived is the only reason Dream was kept alive. It kinda gave me exile vibes with the line like “I want something to believe in or im done, take me where my soul can run”.” Also may I note “Dad” could be replaced w Dream

Sober ~ FIDLAR - ajkakja ok this one might seem a bit weird but let me explain. It kinda gave me “c!Tommy is done w everybody’s shit and bites back.” Mainly ‘biting back’ at techno. Especially with lines like “I’m trying to get better, but I can’t do that when every goddamn thing is about you!” Look, I am an c!Tommy apologist, but I say this with a neutral mind; techno (and some techno apologists) wouldn’t listen to Tommy’s response during both times techno released Withers.

Saint Bernard ~ Lincoln - this one, um I don’t know how to explain. Just, vibes of tommy, kinda talking to Dream? Idk man just listen to it. I’ll just point out the line “there’s really just one thing that we have in common: neither of us will be missed”

ART IS DEAD ~ Bo Burnham - honestly I added this one because my wifey said “this is a c!Tommy song” and I agree but I don’t know how

Not Your Seed ~ TGWDLM - Egg Infected!Tommy? Egg Infected!Tommy. Yeah, it just makes me think of Phil and/or techno finding an Infected!Tommy cuz the lines, yknow? Yeah. This isn’t original, I just know it, but y’all get to deal w it /lh

Ultimately ~ khai dreams - healing arc song. I don’t know what else to say, but I’m soft. I soft and this song was roped in because of it.

Our Word ~ 36 Questions - look, you don’t have to tell me, I know Phil isn’t canonically his dad and techno isn’t canonically family at all, but let me manifest mkay? Yeah this is just vibes of dsmp!sbi. Also explains why c!Tommy is always so defensive and never took the blame for things he did. Also, 36 Questions is underrated, listen to it now 🔫 /j

Freeze Your Brain ~ Heathers the Musical - DID I HEAR BAD HABITS TO COPE WITH TRAUMA? YES I DID. SHUT UP. /lh look, Tommy is only now getting therapy and talking about his trauma, it’s just, vibes of bad habits to cope w trauma, even if that habit is slushies. Also, this is not me promoting villain!tommy, villain!Tommy does not and will not exist

Might Quit ~ Bill Wurtz - this is another weird one, let me explain. I just think the lyrics kinda match the progression of c!Tommy’s life, listen to it idk. Also the progression of the verse(?) line “it’s the first day of school, and I think I might quit” look I can’t explain my thinking w all of these, my brain just hears them, goes brrrr, and connects it to c!Tommy. You guys accepted this, so you get what you asked for /lh

Monster ~ dodie - this is a post-prison arc Tommy song and no one can change my mind. For this one, all I can say is listen to the song man. But I while say, the line progression(?) (like the different ways of saying it in the different verses) of the “cause no one listens to the dead” is just such a match, because c!Tommy even said he still feels like he’s dead, not physically, but because everyone is still treating him so.

[potatotrash0]

Lmao imagine being manipulated by a harbinger (that you’ve interacted w before) into joining an organization that goes against not only ur home + morals but also your brother (who’s disowned u but yknow) AND you get the delusion that killed ur adoptive dad 🥰

I hurt Kaeya so bad he did nothing. But like haha villain arc go brrrr

True!!!! It’s not necessary to give characters More Pain in aus but listen. It’s fun <3

[hishedonism]

3, 18, 36

experience yourself meme  ➤ accepting

∗ o3﹕ do  you  prefer  to  write  in  silence ,  or  with  music  /  background  noise ?

usually i prefer to write in silence bc music can distract me very easily. Autistic Brain goes brrrr & starts honing in on lyrics & going off on daydream trains instead of being able to produce coherent sentences, same with videos being on or talking going on around me. however. for some reason with elijah one of the best ways to get myself in character is through his playlist & i generally have it playing while writing him, even though the silence thing still stands for other kinds of writing, so ????? my boy's an outlier as per usual

∗ 18﹕ which  of  your  verses  or  arcs  is  your  favorite  to  write  about ?

HRNRNAND. i love love love his organised crime & serial killer verses. please for the love of fuck give me more threads in those. in my time since starting rp i've actually written more villains than non - villains so it falls into my Niche™, my familiarity zone if u will, & those verses give me room to explore darker sides of elijah's character & satisfy my Villain Cravings even while he is usually not one u feel ?

dbd / android verse is also fun when i get to write in it, again bc of the whole different side of the character angle, & i've never written non - human / sci - fi stuff iirc so it's new to me ! as for ones i haven't really gotten to write in yet but would like to, i feel like the hunger games would be fun bc of how many possibilities there are just in that alone ( being from the same district, tribute parade / costume stuff, training room threads, interviews, being in the arena itself, fighting or allying, post - games victor interactions, etc ), & the umbrella academy, at least when i'm writing with hargreeves muses in the version of the verse where elijah grew up at the manor, lets me dig into sibling relationships when he doesn't usually have anything like that. stranger things would also be eyes emoji.

i'm still in the process of painstakingly trying to make a six of crows verse for him without it feeling like he's too similar to other characters' canon arcs / traits ( he's a smartmouth gay flirt with addictions ...... & has a well - connected father who abuses him for not being able to read or write ...... & has trauma related to sex & sex work like. he is just a jigsaw of the fucking canon characters chief this isn't easy ) BUT once i get that up i crave grishaverse interactions so bad

∗ 36﹕ how  has  your  writing  style  evolved  since  you  started  writing  on  tumblr ?

well i started writing on tumblr when i was 12 so. hopefully i'm significantly better in multiple ways by now. but talking more recently, i've definitely become more comfortable & at ease with writing more simplistically, not feeling pressured to whip out the prose & poetic wording all the time, not trying to blow everyone away with my sheer writing prowess with every word out of my damn computer. i still like to exercise my more wordy style in fics & oneshots i write for friends or in my spare time but i find rping a lot more fun when i can just relax & let it flow as it may instead of trying to make it sound impressive