#back to bald cats slapping

[deiscension]

﹄ ◇ ; @voidfragments / WHAT'S SHI QINGXUAN THINKING?

💭 qr had his turn now sqx gets to drag him in return

      ⌜◈⌟    ▌ ──  '𝙄 𝙢𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩 𝙛𝙚𝙚𝙡 𝙨𝙤𝙧𝙧𝙮 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝙝𝙞𝙢 𝙞𝙛 𝙝𝙚 𝙬𝙚𝙧𝙚𝙣'𝙩 𝙨𝙤 𝙫𝙞𝙡𝙚. How miserable does someone's life have to be for them to become a rampaging ghost and make it everyone else's problem? Has he no shame? Were I his ancestor, I'd be rattling around in my grave if I found out he was running the mortal realm amok. And in such a tacky manner too! I mean really, bodies strung up in trees, creepy green lights, eating innocent people-- what's the point of it all? Aiyah! Well, I'm not scared of him. Just... a little grossed out.'

     Or, perhaps more succinctly: 

     It can't be that bad-- EWWWWWWWW YOU LIVE LIKE THIS!?

[catboyclarity]

i knew it was gonna happen before i got on T because every single man in my entire family is bald as hell. for a long time i was very insecure and sad and freaked out about it, but actually, it rules. like to slap my bald head. reblog to slap my bald head.

i will say that although i complain online about ppl being shitheads vis-a-vis balding im like. pretty happy being bald. my fiance likes it it helps me pass i have an excuse to wear cool hats that i like AND. this is very important. i dont have to fucking get haircuts anymore. i hated that shit.

[sketchy-angel]

Custom Hualian dolls

𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ𐀔

I started this project in February 2022. I originally made a Puqi Shrine diorama out of an old cardboard box. I still have it and I'll post it soon after I make some minor alterations. I just really wanted to share these 2 since I spent so much effort on them.

Back then, I purchased 2 Obitsu 11cm dolls. I bought them on Aliexpress but judging by the packaging and the fact they were around $15 each I'm pretty sure they're legit.

In this blog I'll talk a bit about the process for those unfamiliar with doll customizing and everyone else who is interested in the process. I'm a doll collector but my customizing skills are very rudimentary and mostly rely on winging it and hoping for the best.

And my motto during this process was "nobody's gonna see the back."

I made the prototype clothes back in 2022 and the stitching was ass. And it took me until last week to gather enough courage to start working on the wigs. I originally purchased very cheap doll hair but it refused to cooperate and I decided to use felt instead.

. ₊ ⊹ . ₊˖ . ₊ . 𓇢𓆸

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His clothes were already basically done when I started over. I added the red ribbon details, added the flower nail charm, the red string and I made the wig, of course.

These outfits are by no means historically or cannonically accurate. I had to modify them to accommodate the scale and my subpar sewing skills. I've gotten much better at sewing since then so don't look at those shoulder seams...

And I still don't know what's going on with the back of his red robes. I think I ran out of fabric :-|

The braid is made using a string of black yarn. The vambraces are actually fake adjustable ear cuffs.

I'll show the wig making process more in Xie Lian's section since Hua Cheng's was easier to make. I just slapped a bunch of felt pieces on the wigcap with glue and voilà!

And E'Ming was made using pencils and gel polish on a piece of cardboard and Xie Lian's butterfly was made with the help of a nail sticker and magnetic cat eye polish. In the finished photo you can see a red gem sticker on E'Ming's eye. I don't know how I feel about it. Do your prefer the design without it? I can easily take it off.

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°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･.˚⊹.

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Xie Lian's outfit and hair was a bit of a challenge but it was fun. I was inspired by several designs and decided to just wing it and make my own outfit instead of recreating an existing one in its entirety.

Also, as you can tell, these dolls have many articulation points that allow for so much posability. I sewed the clothes onto them to keep it in place so they have limited range of movement, especially Hua Cheng, but I'm fine with it. They can still pose nicely.

Instead of making inner and outer robes I decided to make one pair of robes and the second pair that's folded over the shoulders stops at the waist and is hidden by the belt/sash(?) idk English forgive me.

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I tried to make the "main robes" fold over at the waist but I misplaced the rest of that white fabric 2 years ago so I just extended the edges on 3 sides with the sheer fabric from an old curtain and hoped for the best.

Oh, and the shoes are also from Aliexpress. I try not to purchase often from them but I could not find any alternatives...

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The wig making process was... Interesting. I won't show the entire wigcap by itself to spare your eyes so here's balding Xie Lian lol.

The bun was made by rolling felt into a little roll. I then stuck two bigger felt circles onto one side and glued the edges after I cut the outer edges like you would cut a pizza. Does this make sense? Probably not.

Basically, make a rose type thing.

And if you're wondering, the wigs are removable and kind of posable as well.

𓍯𓂃𓏧♡

And that's basically it <3

I wanted to include better quality pics but it won't allow me to post more than 10 at once so I had to stuff them into collages.

Forgot to mute the video so if you hear my cat wreaking havoc in the background no you didn't.

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I may or may not be working on another project centered around Beefleaf...

When I was a kid, I couldn't afford good quality dolls so I played with small doll-like keychains that had knitted dresses, arms and legs made of string, heads made of painted wooden beads and little beanies on their heads.

I have similar beads laying around so I plan to make similar keychains that look like fem Beefleaf.

Of course, I gotta finish that damn Puqi Shrine and hope my cat doesn't cause it to collapse. Maybe one day I'll make keychain versions of other TGCF characters as well!

ଓ༉‧.⭒ֶָ֢⋆.

[yutahoes]

Mommy

based on an overdue ask.

characters: sub! Yuta Nakamoto x dom! company president! Y/N

summary: Working from home has its perks.

word count: 2.2k words

genre: smut

warning: oral - female receiving, handjob, teasing, exhibitionism, sub-dom themes, whiny Yuta, petnames

Being a president is hard. 

All the decision-making for the sake of your company. All the work you have to put time and effort into. Being labeled as incompetent because of your gender, the prominent misogynistic officials waiting for a little slip in your authority. 

Being the president is indeed a stressful job.  

You blew heavy breaths as you listened to the presentation made by the Chinese company you were supposed to partner up with your company. If incompetence comes with gender, then why are these balding middle-aged men in dark tuxedos looking so unsure of the product they’re selling? You knew you were giving an annoyed look at how they stuttered when the product malfunctioned. Why are they wasting your time like this? 

They’re lucky that it was just an online meeting. If not, you might have been out of the door or threw something at them. Working from home on a weekend truly has its perks. 

The door of your home office opened after a light knock. In his black tank top and gray sweatpants, Yuta came inside with a plate of food. You lightly glanced at the clock on the bottom of your screen, surprised that it was already past lunchtime. 

This meeting is already getting really annoying.  

The guy put down a plate of mashed potatoes and a small steak, with mixed vegetables on the side. It’s mouth-watering but you cannot eat while you’re in the meeting. The men presenting showed another slide that made you roll your eyes. You didn’t need the demographic of their customers, your company had their own research. Yet you cannot cut their presentation. You’re just tired of talking. 

You started scribbling something on your tablet, reminders to note for your secretary. Your gaze fell on the guy standing in front of your table, looking at you with his large puppy eyes. Why is he still here? You’re obviously working, can’t he see that? 

Quickly, you pushed a button on your keyboard to stop your video and microphone before turning to him.  "What?" you asked in annoyance. The meeting is already stressing you out, you cannot handle any more stress or you'll just snap. 

Yuta sighed. "I'm hungry." 

A dead look was all you could give him. What the hell? "There's lots of food in the kitchen." You rubbed your temples, obviously pissed off at this point before he continued, "I want to eat you."  You stared in surprise, how bold. "You've been so stressed. I want to make you feel good.” His big, brown eyes pleading. 

You just stared at him, taken back at how brazen he was. But then, this was what you liked most about Yuta. And maybe this is just what you need to improve your mood. "Please, Mommy. I promise I'll be good." 

A smile played on your lips before nodding at him. He looked like an excited puppy as he walked in front of you, kneeling from under your desk. Yuta helped you slip out of your panties, lucky that you’re wearing a short skit. "Itadakimasu" he whispered, palms together before he leaned in to kiss the inside of your thigh. 

You made sure that your camera cannot capture him before clicking a button that would put you back to the meeting, apologizing about your little kitty cat who was desperate to play with you. You felt Yuta smile at the statement. Your fingers thread along his dark hair as his lips alternate from sucking and licking your inner thighs. 

The men on the screen kept on talking, stopping from time to time to maybe check your reaction and ask for your opinion. The man kneeling in front of you kept on pleasuring you with his lips and his tongue. Yuta’s hand grazed on your hip, north to your waist. But before it can reach your breasts, a normal thing he would do whenever he was down to eat you, you slapped his hand and gave him a stern look. The participants of the online meeting seemed to stop and you apologized once again, “My cat was being naughty. Sorry.”  

Your gaze fell on Yuta who was pouting, sitting cross-legged on the floor. He parted your legs before placing them on his shoulders to have full access to your nether region. You rolled your eyes, lightly smiling, at his actions. How adorable. 

You focused on the meeting as he placed his tongue on your clit, making you shudder. He was gentle, unlike last night when he was like a beast craving for you, maybe because you already warned him to behave at this moment. His tongue entered your core, lips sucking on your pussy lips. If there is one thing Yuta is really good at, that would be eating you. And letting him do that deed right now, really did lessen the annoyance you’re feeling. 

The Chinese men started pitching their last agenda for the meeting and you inwardly smile. The meeting is almost over. More time to play with your little kitten. Once they ended the meeting, you thanked them and referred them to talk to your secretary for a follow-up meeting who was in the same meeting as you. 

When you clicked the button that disabled your microphone and camera, you leaned on your chair while wrapping your legs on Yuta’s head. He alternated between lapping and sucking your pussy which earned a soft mewl coming from you. Your hands gripped his hair as you grind your hips on his face, eager to get to your orgasm. He didn’t disappoint as he crept his hand up your body to squeeze your breasts. “So good.” You mumbled eyes closed. His nose was hitting your clit, creating friction that made it more pleasurable. “That’s really good, baby.” 

You knew it was the word that would rile Yuta, a pet name you kept on calling him over and over again. He ravaged your pussy, like a man starved of food. He didn’t stop even if you squirted on his face and kept on slurping everything you release. 

Yuta was out of breath and lips so swollen that he looked like he’ll pass out. His chin and neck were so wet with your juice that the front of his tank top stuck to his skin. Sweat beads appeared on his forehead and an evident bulge was visible on his gray sweatpants. You leaned closer, holding his cheek. The low cut of your blouse showed your cleavage that made him visibly gulp. “Good job, baby.” Your thumb touched his bottom lip and he didn’t take a chance to suck it. “I think my baby deserves his reward.” You leaned on your chair, crossing your arms on your chest to enhance your breasts, and crossing your legs so that the heel of your stiletto touched his bulge. “Is there anything you want, baby boy?”  

He looked so fucked up. So messed up. “Mommy, please fuck me.” It was a lovely sight to see. You wanted to tie him in bed that instant and make him cum repeatedly until he begs you to stop. “I need you, please Mommy.” 

You shook your head, resting your head on your hand above the table. “I don’t think you deserve it yet.” His eyes widened in confusion before worry flashed in his eyes. He started begging, muttering how he was going to be a good boy that amused you. How adorable. 

“Stand up.” You commanded and he quickly sprang up on his feet. You twirled the string of his sweatpants using your finger before pulling him closer. “Then,” You started, staring at him with your erotic eyes. “I don’t want you to make a sound.” 

Yuta nodded almost immediately and you pulled down his sweatpants and boxers, revealing his hard cock. He really does need you, how cute. You ordered him to sit on your desk and like a puppy, he obeyed immediately. Your hands traveled to his thighs, moving your chair closer to him. “Please suck me.” 

You stood up, making him confused. “I told you not to make a sound,” you whispered against his ear, your fingernail grazing along his inner thigh. "Understood?" He hummed as an answer and you repeated the question in a louder voice, "Understood?"  He nodded, earning a smirk from you. The pad of your finger dragged along the side of his cock and you saw how he held himself from making a sound by biting his bottom lip. 

Your lips came in contact with the side of his neck, hands under his tank top heading north to his chest. The dark garment was easily discarded to the floor and Yuta is now stark naked on your desk. You bit your lip as you watched him whimper at your gaze, staring at you with his pleading eyes. “No sound, understood?” You repeated as he nodded frantically, eyes hooded with lust and want. A giggle escaped your lips at how helpless he looked. Like a lost kitten. Your own lost kitten. 

“Kitten,” you whispered before pressing butterfly kisses below his ear down to the side of his neck. “My naughty kitten.” You sink your teeth on his left shoulder then grasped his throbbing cock with your right hand. You can feel his body tense up, hands grasping the edge of your desk. It’s amazing how he kept on being quiet, avoiding creating a sound by biting his bottom lip. Your tongue went south from his shoulder to his chest, stopping to apply pressure on his nipple, while your hands pumped his cock. 

He feels so hot on your fingertips. His cock kept on throbbing as his body squirmed, small whimpers coming out from his mouth. You alternated sucking and nibbling his nipple before moving to the other one. Yuta’s cock is so red that you’re sure he might explode soon. Is he this needy? You haven’t even done anything weird, just a simple handjob. 

With a smirk, you held his cock tight with one hand before using the other hand to rub the tip. His head rolled back, hands supporting his body with his eyes closed. He looked so fucked up, it amuses you. But there’s something missing, something that you’re slowly yearning for at the moment. “You can make a sound now.” The sides of your lips curled up when he shouted, “Mommy.”  

“Are you enjoying, my little kitten?” You kept on jerking his twitching cock, the other hand massaging his balls. 

“Yes,” he moaned, “That feels so good, Mommy.” Your pumping moved from fast to slow, lips leaving small marks on his skin. His face was filled with unadulterated pleasure, moans kept on coming out of his lips. “Mommy, I’m close.” You pumped faster, eager to get him to his release. “Can I cum?” 

A proud feeling engulfed your chest, you trained him well. “Of course baby, you earned it.” He kept on thanking you as white spurts of cum filled your hand, some shooting on your blazer. “Thank you so much, Mommy.” 

“Did you have fun, baby?” He nodded, catching his breath. You smiled then kissed him lightly on the lips before looking at something beside him, “Did you enjoy it as well, Mark?” 

The look on Yuta’s face is comical as you watched him looking back at the screen of your computer. There, he was in a complete display of skin. His cock was in full view and twitching. Mark, your secretary, looking down as if he doesn’t know what to do. “Did you enjoy the show, Mark?” 

Yuta’s eyes widened in realization before facing you, hiding from the camera of your computer screen. “You’re cruel,” he whispered, leaning his head on your shoulder as if hiding from your secretary. A giggle was all you can answer. He’s enjoying it as well, evident was his now hardening cock. You didn’t know Yuta has an exhibitionism kink. “You’re evil.” 

“And you love me for it.” You kissed his cheek, laughing. “I’ll just finish this real quick. Wait for me inside the room, hmm?” He nodded, smiling before walking past your desk and out of the video frame.

You fixed your blazer and sat properly on your chair as if nothing happened. Yuta came back then leaned in to kiss you on the lips, “I love you, Y/N.” You grinned. How clingy. 

When Yuta left, you leaned on the chair before telling Mark some reminders about the meeting that happened earlier. His eyes seemed to be wandering around, unable to look at you. “Mark,” you called. “Look at me.” He cleared his throat before shyly looking at you, a red tinge on his cheeks. You knew that look. When you were just getting to know Yuta, he used to look at you like that. You cross your arms, making sure that your breasts are emphasized. Your secretary gulped before licking his lips, “If you make this business work, I might give you a reward Markie.” His eyes widened in surprise before the corner of your lips turned up at his answer,

“Yes, Mommy.”     

[corvusblackk]

where i shifted to last night

(i used this method.)

about this dr:

i call it ‘futuristic dr’, i got inspiration from one of my favourite asmr lol, it’s this one if you’re curious.

when i woke up:

it was still night and it was raining outside, and it was strange because it was coming from my right side and I have the window above me in void reality, then I could smell a different type of scent like orange, but I kept my eyes closed because I was tired. at some point however, I don't know how much time passed, I felt a weight on my chest and a slap on my face that made me open my eyes and I found THIS BALD CAT (don’t get me wrong, i love sphynx cats) on me and it started meowing. I was weirded out because I was saying what the fuck does this guy want at this time of the night, so I got up to feed him and at that point I realized "what the, I don't have a sphynx" so I connected the dots, in fact it wasn’t even my house, that is, it wasn't my CR's, and I wasn't me, because I was fucking tall and when I complained about the cat I heard a low damn manly voice so yeah i was like that ain’t enea. since it was night, i had the time to recollect everything and remember. the house was very cool, a small apartment with big windows on each wall to the sight of skyscrapers and damn flying cars. it was chill.

about me and other stuff:

my name was Neo, a very tall 27 years old guy, I'm not sure how much tall, maybe 1.90m or something like that, literally a pole. I had very pale skin and short black hair, visible veins on my eyelids and temples, brown eyes with some big dark circles because of my job shifts. I was pretty introverted and doubtful of ppl, but very independent and mature, intellect and cleverness was a big trait i had (in fact coming back here with this small brain was a bit ehm) and I've noticed that I caught lots of stares from many beautiful women (i’m just telling you, even tho nobody asked about this detail, i was just very hot ngl, in fact my appearance was similar to the picture above, that’s the closest i found). and I had this bad habit of smoking every day, like as soon as I woke up I immediately smoked cigarette (i don’t smoke here). i had this long black leather coat that i wore everyday.

I worked as a bartender at this chic flying hotel called Hotel 47, a subunit of the Skyward Heights chain (like in the asmr). I worked the night shift, from 10pm to 4am, in fact I basically sleep until the afternoon and am always tired and sleepy.

I owned a flying black motorcycle with some silver and blue trims. I've only bought it recently, beforehand I had a smaller one that I practically grew up with, I bought this new one with my savings since my job pays me decently. I'm not super rich, but I'm good, I can afford everything I need easily.

I didn’t have many friends because of my stick-up-in-ass personality, but I had some good close ones that were very different from me. there was this guy with yellow spiked hair and he was literally the opposite of me, he was high-key hyperactive and dumb (/jk) and the other guy was funny, he made me laugh a lot gotta admit. and then there was this girl, similar to the one in the video, with long pink hair, and there was something going on with her, don’t know how to call us, but there was something indeed (which was weird because i’m hella gay here hello???).

and that’s some info about this dr, i have to eat dinner now.

[k-marzolf]

Seeds

Canon typical violence, blood, threats, intimidation, past with sexual abuse (both reader and Billy), kissing, dark themes, fem!reader

Rabbit Heart Masterlist.

1,022 words.

“How’d Russo get a sweet piece of ass like you?” asked a balding, short man, leering at you as he approached you in the hallway.

You stopped in your tracks, you’d been on your way to see Billy in his office.

Men made you nervous, and you flinched when he touched your arm. “I want a taste,” he smirked, as your hand jerked and you slapped him. Hard.

His head snapped to the side, and he looked angry, a red handprint on his face. “Bitch,” he spat hand tightening on your arm making you claw at his face with your other hand, as Billy’s office door opened.

You were shaking, and Billy noticed, as his eyes lazily turned to Morty. Like a cat ready to pounce on his prey. “Morty,” he greeted, casually. “What’re you doin’ here? And take your goddamn hands off her.” He asked, hands in his jeans pockets, moving over to you.

“Rawlins wants—“ Morty said, letting go of you, but was cut off immediately.

Billy bared his teeth, “I don’t give a fuck what Rawlins wants. He’s a dog looking for scraps at his master’s table, and you’re just a rat with the courage of a rabbit.” Billy said roughly.

And something about the casual way he handled Morty, had you pressing your thighs together. You’d never seen him working or in action.

“Fuck you, Russo. Maybe I’ll visit your girl tonight—“ Morty didn’t get to finish his sentence.

Billy unsheathed his hidden blade, and struck him in the shoulder, faster than a snake strike, making Morty scream as Billy pushed through bone, unsympathetic, a warning. “You touch my girl, and I go for your eye next. Match your master, huh?” Billy asked, getting his face, blade dripping with blood as he carved a mark under Morty’s eyes, making him grit his teeth.

He pulled back, pulling out a cloth and wiping his blade, “You can tell Rawlins I ain’t interested in what he has to say.”

Morty looked hatefully at Billy, blood dripping down his face, spitting at him, before pushing past, holding his bleeding shoulder, and leaving the country house.

You felt sick from Morty’s touch, he had reminded you of your uncle, rat like and pushy. How he’d watch you in your bedroom while you slept in the chair in the corner, or go through your undergarment drawer, and steal some of your underwear. He’d blackmailed you with that one. “I’ll say, look at what my niece gave me.” He had taunted, making your heart drop. Or the way he’d touch your arm softly, fingers moving along like a spider crawling along your skin.

Billy followed you down the hall, his combat boots squeaking a little bit, as you made your way into the kitchen. It was huge, but sunny looking. Beige colored walls, with light colored wood cabinets, and stainless steel appliances. There was a sliding glass door that led outside, bringing in the sun making it seem warm inside, even the winter.

You wanted something to eat. You’d always eaten when things got tough, especially carbs. You craved those often. It was why your father always said you were fat, that no man was going to want you if you didn’t cut back a little.

Billy didn’t seem to give a fuck about your extra weight, he often pulled you into his lap while he read over paperwork, or his men gave reports. Anvil was a cover for his criminal operations, and you hated when he had to go to the city and make an appearance.

Billy watched you grab some pomegranate seeds, and asked; “Did he touch you, bunny?” His voice was low, seething at the thought, but he didn’t touch you yet, knowing you might be triggered. He understood, the word pretty still made him uncomfortable after all these years. He still gets a pit in his stomach like a stone.

You’re never the same after someone violates you, and takes away your autonomy.

“Just my arm. I slapped him.” You said, biting into the seeds, sighing at how good they tasted.

Billy grinned, “That’s my girl.” He said, kissing your forehead, and you leaned into his touch.

You replayed Billy stabbing Morty, his casual way he handled him, like a cat toying with a mouse, and pressed your thighs together. “You were kind of sexy, the way you handled Morty.” You said, juice dripping down your chin.

You moved to wipe it away, but Billy caught your hand, and leaned in, his mouth lapping up the juices, making you whine softly.

You and Billy had never consummated anything, despite the teasing, and the fooling around. He didn’t want to push you knowing you’d been sexually abused. And he was surprised he was uninterested in other women, despite never having taken you to bed.

He enjoyed the companionship, the soft press of your body to him at night with your fingers in his hair, the sweet things you’d do for him, or reading together with your feet in his lap, and the conversations late at night.

He pulled back, “Sexy, huh?” He asked, lips turning up. You were so goddamn cute.

You bit into another seed, and god it was taking everything in Billy not to have you against the counter, to hear the sweet sounds he knew you’d make just for him.

“Tryin’ to tempt me?” He asked in a low voice, caging you in against the counter, you let the juice drip down, and he caught it with his tongue again, kissing your mouth this time.

You clutched his green sweater, returning his kiss, leaning on your tippy toes to taste the whiskey in his mouth. He gave you soft kisses that left you breathless, and hard kisses too, that had you aching for him, his fingers tangled in your hair, pressed against you. You could feel every inch of him.

You both spent the rest of the afternoon sharing pomegranate seeds, and kissing, both content to let it go no further.

But you realized with an ache between your thighs you were ready to trust Billy with yourself.

[reginaldqueribundus]

Could I beat that Star Trek doctor in a fight?

Joseph M'Benga: no. god no. the man was so good at murder they tried to get him to quit his doctor job and go back to it. trust me you don't want that smoke

T'Ana: no way. she's angry all the time and she's part cat. she would kick my ass dude. and probably make out with Shaxs on top of my unconscious body, eww

Hugh Culber: absolutely fucking not. that guy was dead for half a season and spent the entire time working out like he was in prison. then he came back to life to punch his murderer. I'm not messing with him

Phlox: Phlox seems like a pushover. Do we ever see him do anything physical? I guess he could sic his pet bat on me or something.

The Doctor: he's just a hologram so it wouldn't be very satisfying. you can't even punch him. yet I still kinda wanna slap his bald head for acting like an incel

Julian Bashir: easy W. genetically engineered reflexes or not that twink is softer than a marshmallow in a microwave. the danger comes from the deadly assassin and powerful Irishman protecting him

Beverly Crusher: Blazin Bev has hidden depths, she would probably kick your ass and tap dance on it. I personally would be too busy simping to fight her anyway

Kathryn Pulaski: yeah you could beat Pulaski, if only in the name of standing up for Data, but why would you want to

Leonard McCoy: listen. McCoy had a scalpel held to his throat and his response was pointing out his jugular so he'd die faster. I don't think it's possible to defeat him in a way that matters

as for the other shows, Picard didn't really have a doctor character besides Jurati, but she wasn't a medical doctor. She also killed a dude and turned into a Borg Queen so, y'know. Probably a bad idea to start shit with her. I don't think the Prodigy gang really had a doctor either unless you count Zero? I feel like I could just knock them over pretty easily but if they takes off that containment suit it's game over. I really wanna beat up the Dauntless's shitty Tellarite doctor though.

[the-hufflepuffle]

Things my brother and I have said as God of War pt. 2

🪓

Freyr: I want nothing to do with your cat

Freya: sure, I get it. You don't like cats I won't inflict mine on you

*2 days later*

Freyr: bring me my nephew, my little boy, let me see him.

🪓

Magni: *slaps Thruds back between shoulder baldes*

Thrud: YOU FUCKER YOU BRA'D ME!!

Magni: shit! I'm sorry!

Thrud: AAAAAAA

🪓

Magni, looking at a plane: wow that's a big one.

Modi: that's what she said

Magni: Modi...

Modi: it was right there!

Magni: and it was hilarious but seriously?

🪓

Balder: wanna play machete on my backyard?

Thor: fuck yes I do

🪓

Freya: watch this *eats fir needle*

Freyr: what is wrong with you?!

Freya: it's good. Tastes like straight up vitamin C.

Freyr: but why??

Freya: why not?

🪓

Texting

Tyr: I'm making soup

Heimdal:

Tyr: do you want some?

Heimdal:

Tyr: hello?

Heimdal:

Tyr: soup?

Heimdal:

Tyr: are you alive??

Heimdal: I hate soup

Tyr: I don't understand

🪓

*listening to live and let die by the wings, specifically the Shrek 3 one*

Freyr: play this at my funeral

Freya: what?

Freyr: it'll be funny

Freya: you know what fuck it sure. I will play Shrek 3's Live and Let Die by The Wings at your funeral

[foreverdolly]

𝐅𝐀𝐊𝐄 𝐇𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐮𝐞 | 𝐛𝐨𝐬𝐬!𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐧 𝐱 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

summary: you’re hoping to make a good impression on your new boss. there’s just one problem: he’s an asshole. a very hot asshole.

pairings: boss!austin x employee!reader

word count: 2.2k

warning/notes: you guys have begged for more fake dating, so here it is. the beginning of what will be the end. this love story is adorable, and their dynamic is my absolute favorite. can't wait to post part three in the next week.

↰ previous part | next part ↱

“Well I heard he’s quite the looker.” Sophia mumbled under her breath, practically jogging to keep up with your long strides. The last thing you wanted was to be late for the big floor meeting, especially since you were about to be introduced to your new boss. That would be the icing on the shitty cake. Still, you refused to let this morning's parking ticket ruin your good mood. 

“Who said that? Nobody aside from Jeff has seen him, and that was only to finalize his paperwork.” One of the plant's leaves slapped you in the face as you began climbing the stairs, and with a groan you tucked the pot a little closer to your side, freeing up your vision so that you wouldn’t fall forward and bust your ass. You had picked up a little welcome gift for the newbie last night during your trip to the grocery store. It was only once you had gotten home that you realized that the plant didn’t have any plastic marker that stated its “preferences”. You hoped your newfound boss wouldn’t mind doing some googling in order to take care of his new greenery. Thankfully the man would be getting one of the nicer offices, which meant he’d have window space. 

“Martha from the first floor. She greeted him last week when he ran by to sign some papers.” Sophia was already out of breath from quickly climbing the stairs, muttering a few curse words as she tried to keep up with you and your fast pace. 

Martha was also a fifty year old crazy cat lady, so her saying that the mystery man was “handsome” meant nothing to you. If anything you were even more suspect about his good looks than you had been before. You let out a breathy laugh, freeing up one of your hands to open up the door for your best friend. 

“Martha also thinks that the mail delivery guy is a “looker”, and that guy has a receding hairline and buck teeth.” You were quick to fire back. 

Sophia looked like she wanted to argue, but stopped herself, a thoughtful look befalling her face. “Yeah. . . no, you’re totally right. Why didn’t I think of that? He’s probably going to have two heads.” 

You laughed loudly at that, turning to face your best friend as you continued the familiar walk to the conference room. “He’s probably bald- oof!” You grunted as you walked into a solid chest, the potted plant nearly flying out of your grasp. 

The person that you bumped into moved lightening fast, strong arms coming to wrap around both the pot and your arms. A little bit of dirt fell on the ground, and as you stared down at it you began to feel sorry for Javie, the janitor. You loved that tiny man. Behind you Sophia sucked in a breath, though you were too embarrassed to really pay attention to anything else other than the stranger’s dirt covered sleeve. You reached out, brushing off their nice- very expensive- blazer. 

“God, I should have been paying better attention to where I was walking. I’m so sorry.” You apologized, looking up at who you thought was Jeff. 

Because this person was practically a giant compared to most of the people on this floor, and the outfit and shoes? That was at least two months worth of your pay- if not more. Designer, no doubt. When you looked up, rather than meeting Jeff’s familiar brown eyes- you were met with blue. 

And there he was, in all of his glory. Him being “quite the looker” was the understatement of the century. This man was a model. His wire rimmed glasses did nothing to make him look boyish. The stranger in front of you was all man. For a few seconds all the two of you did was stare at each other. The blonde looked just as stunned as you did, his plush lips softly parted, eyes wide as he took in your features. After a moment he cleared his throat, his jaw clenching as he must have realized that the two of you were blocking hallway traffic, his hands still firmly wrapped around you. 

“We’re about to be late for the meeting.” He took a step back, and the loss of his firm grip on your arm nearly took your breath away.

Within seconds his warm, even soft blue eyes had hardened, his outwardly caring exterior turning ice cold. You tossed a look behind you at Sophia, dropping your jaw animatedly only for her to see before moving quickly to fall in step next to your new boss. “I’m so sorry about your blazer. I’ll pay for the dry cleaning-” 

He was already unbuttoning the soiled jacket, shrugging it off of his broad shoulders so that he was only standing in his crisp button up shirt and tie. His waist was narrow, accentuated by his belt. You could tell he was fit underneath all of those clothes. You hated yourself for it, but you were practically drooling. 

“Don’t worry about it. Just work hard for me from now on and we’ll call it even. Yeah?” He cut his eyes over towards you, and though you wanted to shrink under his gaze you merely held your head high and nodded. You were above outwardly fawning over the new guy. 

You weren’t, however, above silently crushing from afar. 

The man commanded the room unlike anything you’d ever seen before. Everything about his posture, his broad shoulders, and the surety of his actions told you that he meant business. Everybody stayed mostly silent as he introduced himself. Austin Butler. He looked like an Austin, you supposed. As he spoke you tried to rearrange the dirt in the pot with your fingers, smoothing it out so that it no longer looked ruined. The card in your purse suddenly seemed like overkill. You wanted him to think that you were nice, not a kiss ass. Then again, you needed to fix the horrible impression you had no doubt left him with earlier. He breezed out of the room the second that he was finished with the meeting, seemingly in a hurry to rid himself of the crowded room. Jeff was nowhere to be seen, but he had sent you an email earlier stating that he might be late coming back from lunch. His wife was out of town and their beloved cat, Mr Samson, hadn’t been eating well over the last week. You stood up, addressing the room with a bright smile. 

“Alright everyone, Jeff is going to be busy for the rest of the day, meaning you’ll either report directly to me or Mr Butler. Jenna? Can you drop by my cubicle before you leave today? I’ve got that Henderson file for you.” The blonde nodded, lazily joining the crowd as they dispersed out of the room. For a second you stood at the head of the long table, your eyes nervously darting back over to Sophia. 

“Thank god I work the payroll. I’d probably have a heart attack if I had to talk to Austin every day.” She mumbled, pretending to fan herself. 

You grabbed the plant off of the table, straightening out your shoulders as you walked over towards the door. “Well- let’s just hope that I didn’t fuck it up already. The last thing I need is for the guy to hate me.” 

You waved your goodbyes before heading straight towards the once unoccupied office. There were a few boxes on the floor, but there weren’t any decorations up yet. No pictures of wives or children, which you hoped meant that he was single. Not like you wanted to date him. . . just ogle from afar. You knocked on the open door, ducking your head in to shoot him one of your dazzling smiles. It usually worked on everyone. Almost everyone. Austin didn’t smile back. 

Your heart rate began to pick up as you held the plant up, giving it a gentle shake before placing it on the edge of his spotless desk. 

“It’s a little bit ironic, but I bought this for you. Consider it a welcome gift from me and my team.” Before he could say anything else, you were already digging into your purse, handing over the card too. 

He slowly took it from you, shooting you an incredulous look before opening it. You weren’t sure why. . . but his standoffish attitude was rubbing you the wrong way. Maybe it was the fact that he was outwardly perfect. You should have expected him to be rude. Pretty people are often rotten on the inside. You cleared your throat, pointing at the card. 

“Just a few words of encouragement. I thought it might make you feel a little more comfortable around all of these new faces. If you ever nee-” 

And then he did it. Did this thing. 

He sighed. He sighed like you were bothering him. Like your presence was a nuisance. Your face fell, your teeth clenched, and all at once you decided that you couldn’t stand Austin Butler. He was blowing you off. Shrugging off your kind gestures. Your unnecessarily kind gestures. Your hands balled up into fists at your sides as you tried to fight off the urge to slap the glasses right off of his pretty-boy face. 

“I’m not trying to be rude, but I’m really busy at the moment.” He was cool guying you. He was totally fucking cool guying you right now. 

“Oh,” Your voice had lowered an octave, shaking with anger. He seemed to notice, his eyes quickly flickering up to meet your face. “I can see that I came at the wrong time.”

You started to walk out of the office, flinching back slightly as you saw Jeff headed towards you with a bright smile. You were heatedly walking off in the direction of your cubicle before the older man could say anything to you. 

It was decided. Set in stone. 

You hated Austin Butler with a passion. 

“Well, what was that about?” Jeff closed the door behind him, nodding off in the direction of the female. 

Austin read over the name again and again, signed in her adorable handwriting. He let out another sigh, tossing the card down onto his desk before he covered his face with his hands. 

“I don’t know. I panicked. Shit, now she thinks I’m an asshole.” His office chair creaked as he leaned back, praying that the floor would swallow him up. 

He had been so overwhelmed in the meeting. He probably came off as cold, which was exactly what he didn’t want to do. His anxiety had gotten the best of him today, and you were proof. Because he had seen you in the hall before you bumped into him. He could have prevented all of that from happening. And how could he not see you? He had been so focused on your button up blouse and form fitting pencil skirt that he had forgotten how to function. And then he learns that not only are you working on the same floor, but working directly under him. Meaning that he would have to talk to you. Every day. Austin didn’t do crushes. He was a workaholic. He was the king of heating up leftovers and eating alone every night. He was too busy for relationships, so it shouldn’t matter that the prettiest girl he had ever seen was just a stone's throw away from him. Right? Right? 

“Well, you’re screwed now.” Jeff smiled smugly, crossing his arms over his chest, leaning back against the door. 

Austin’s heart jumped up to his throat, his mouth opening and closing as he tried to form a sentence. He looked like an idiot. 

“W-What do you mean? I’m screwed? Do you think she hates me? Already?” 

Jeff opened the door a crack, peeking his head out. Austin was quick to stand up from his desk, joining him by the door. And there you were, tossing your purse onto your desk like the inanimate object had personally offended you. He had the perfect view of you from his office. He was doomed. Jeff watched her for a few more seconds before clicking his tongue. 

“. . . Oh, definitely.” 

Austin tore the glasses off of his face, tossing them down onto his desk so that he could rub at his eyes exasperatedly. 

“How do I fix it? God. . . Should I go out there right now?” Austin motioned towards the door with one hand, loosening his tie with the other. It felt like it was choking him. 

“Take her out on a date.” Jeff was smiling smugly again, shaking his head in pretend disapproval. “I can’t believe you already offended the most hot headed female that I’ve ever met. I was gone for an hour.” 

Austin sucked in a breath, his knees buckling underneath him. He had to lean against the desk for support. “I’m not going to take her on a date. I’m her boss, Jeff.” The younger male practically gasped. 

Jeff opened the door, leaving the boy with some parting words.  “I wasn’t born yesterday, Butler. I give it. . . six months. You’ll see.”

@knoxvillesshoes@cosmorant@ol1viam@simply-sams-things@haim80s@gabbcabb@8hgel@slutt4him@busy-bee-angel-misska@kaitaesupremacy@dazedshoon @4rt3m1ss@cryingabtab@kittenlittle24@austinsrealgf@austinbutlersgirlfriend@clearbolts @dark-as-love@anni-secret-account-75@ab4eva@starcatchxr @julietamidala @obbsessivereader@gwuide@blurredcolour@the-little-red-haired-girl@meladollsims@poppet05@shrekstheloml@randomwriter888@idc123sworld@vane28282@mirandastuckinthe80s@girlblogger2002@rockerchick05@screechingstrawberrysong@simpforevery1@girlabirla@dre6ming@obetrolncocktails@fairyjanes@jensenswinchester@lo-bells @in-my-body-bag@fxntxsix@petrparkrslut@eliseinmemphis @lelifesaver @screaching-cookie@fantuhsise@areuirish @bcofl0ve@mslizziesblog@shynovelist@ssstrangersblog @harrysthecraic@hangmanswhore@jyvnho@mymamalife @melodydior

[princess-of-thebes-1995]

I want to really start writing love thy enemy chapter 2 but I don't know how to start it. The main point of chapter is done.

I guess I have to make this a drabble. I want to write how Reader Chan met Lyle Wainfleet.

It doesn't add up to the story. I don't want this scene to go to waste. Here you go.

You were admiring the cute little feline animal the Colonel caught for you when he was on tour in the jungle. After you began to date him. He made not only your life but your friend's lives good.

Like today, he and his elite team protected the some scientist while they collected whatever they wanted from the Pandora jungle. Risking their lives for a group of people they hate.

The Marine soldiers were curious why their leader was nice to those science pukes. Of course they couldn't ask their superior.

The Colonel was annoyed that you begged him not to make the relationship public. He felt offended. Were embarrassed to be with him? You told him how you wanted him to speak to your dad first and wait a few weeks. You never loved a man before. Minus the jerk who wanted to marry you back on Earth just for your pretty face. He broke your heart.

So, of course you have trust issues. The Colonel video chatted your dad. Your dad was actually upset. The Colonel was perhaps only ten years younger than him. Might as well be his younger brother and your uncle!

Your dad knew you liked older men. But not this old! But, your father remembered how like your mother. You and her were subjugated all their lives. A pretty doll. That's it. The young generations didn't value love and went for lust only. So, he reluctantly gave his blessings to the Colonel.

The Colonel didn't like your dad. Quaritch felt offended when he saw the rich man look at him with distaste. He didn't need to rub in his age.

Whatever. Your father was a handsome lad, Quaritch admitted. But, Quaritch also pitied the older man. He looked tired from all his philanthropy shit and childish optimism goals. Your father will kill himself from exhaustion.

Now, Quaritch would sneak around the base. Fucking the shit out of you whenever he had the chance no matter how busy you were with your work. He wanted to touch you in public like holding your hand and show affections and yes that included kissing.

From the what the Colonel told you, the feline cat already lost his mom. And you believed his men were not the reason for the mothers death.

So, you were playing with it while waiting for Max to record some video logs Jake was producing.

"Hey." A male voice boomed.

You looked up to see a shaved head Marine with muscles and tattoos. Is he a friend of Jake?

"Mind if I touch your pussy?" He grinned.

Everyone around the room became quiet. Your mouth dropped in shock. You never been insulted so bluntly and in public before. Not even on Earth!

The jerk snickered at your expression. "I meant your cat." He pointed at the now hissing feline.

You glared and stood up. He blinked and wondered what will you do. You slapped him! His face was moved to the side.

"Get away from her!" Jake yelled while he rolled his wheelchair over to you.

The bald guy turned his face back at you and held his hands up in mocking surrender. He told Jake that the Colonel wanted to speak with him.

They both left the lab and all your friends huddled over to comfort you. You were shaking and still scared that you were sexually harassed in broad daylight.

The Colonel spoke to Jake and then noticed something was off. Lyle and Jake never got along but the tension was worse. Whatever. He got enough problems on his plate.

The Colonel was upset that you were not in his office. It was his lunch break. He told you to meet him there.

He got annoyed when you didn't text back and he had enough. He rudely barged in the science wing of the other pukes. He ignored the stares when the other scientists noticed his presence in their lab bedrooms.

He kicked your door open.

He found you in your bed with that short and fat scientist Max and another female Medic rubbing your shoulder. You looked up with your teary eyes to see your secret lover.

The Colonel ordered your friends to leave.

"The Fuck were you?" His eyes softened when he saw your dead expression. Your boyfriend sat next to you in your bed.

You blurted what happened.

"What did the soldier look like?"

Quaritch was angry when you described him as his Marine.

You shrugged. "I don't know. He said you sent him to pick up Sully for a report."

In cold fury, Quaritch clenched his jaw. "Lyle." He hissed.

The Colonel grabbed your chin and made you look at him. "I am going to make us public. I don't know why you want to keep this a secret. You're not safe unless people know you belong to me."

Your eyes widened. It's too soon. You didn't tell your friends yet.

"But ..."

The Colonel's look made you shut up.

He told you how you are to go his room immediately. You better be there when he comes back. He will send female staff soldiers to bring your belongings to his quarters. Or should you say your quarters.

While you were waiting for your boyfriend at his room. The Colonel was looking for Lyle. He went to the gym. The bunks and then the pilot garage.

There stood Wainfleet and other soldiers.

When they saw the Colonel walk they saluted him with respect. The Colonel wordlessly punched Lyle in the abs which caused him to clutch his stomach from pain.

The others stared in shock.

"Stay away from my girl." Quaritch snarled as he looked down at Wainfleet's pathetic form on the ground.

Lyle looked up in confusion.

Quaritch explained. "Name belongs to me. If I catch you disrespecting her again you will be resigned from your corporal status."

He looked at the others. "That goes for the rest of you."

"Yes, Sir!" They said in unison.

You were sitting on the king sized bed of your new room. You watched buff female staff bring in your belongings and your cat was sleeping on your lap.

The Colonel came in and visibly relaxed after seeing you obey him. He didn't wait for the staff to leave. He sat next to you and kissed you. "I am sorry I couldn't protect you. But, it's your fault in a way. If everyone knew about us. They wouldn't hurt you."

You laid your head on his shoulder blade. "I'm sorry for being foolish."

He wrapped his arm around you. He knew the female staff would gossip. Good. Everyone must know who you belonged to.

He was still on his lunch break...

The Colonel smirked. He ordered the staff to leave and stripped you and noticed the cat staring at him as he nailed into you.

This was why the Colonel preferred dogs.

[sparkly-sediment]

ur the second eden i know and the second to be mother but the first to be mother in the way like i think youd ask me to get you a pack from the corner store. and id do it but id keep the change. thoughts on engiescout i dont know what theyre calling it now Also can you say Hi to my Cat Her name is Portable Drilling Machine She ate Her brothers inthe womb and has nothjng but sisters. its about sisterhood

this is divine communication I would absolutely ask you to go to the corner store. I would tell you to keep the change because Ik I’m being naughty and you’re doing me a solid. I would sell you weed no stems

Tf2 engiscout

Big shout out to my beautiful girl Portable Drilling Machine (devourer of womb mates) love you feminist queen

It starts off with Engi and Scout sharing a beer in the workshop! Scout pesters him enough so Engineer finally cracks and sits him down with a bottle

They get on surprisingly well! Engineer is amused by Scout like a cat with a fly and Scout is desperate from attention from an older man

Engineer has an incredible ego and a 11 PhDs to support it. With Scout being so easily astonished and gushing over anything that interests him (pretending he’s an expert while simultaneously knowing nothing)

Engi’s ego is STROKED. ERECT. ROCK HARD COCK SOLID. Scout likes the power he feels he has making Engineer happy. Doing his best to please, be helpful, as you know.

It’s a very teasing relationship. Scout calls engineer bald, slaps his perfectly smooth head, and then gets pinned with his back on a shop desk (much to his delight)

Scout steals Engineers sweet teas?? And as payback Engi nabs a bang and tries a sip, and then his lip corrodes off

SHIT IS BATTERY ACID!!! And it makes other things acidic too… our southern bell will suck but not swallow (tried it once and fell ill for days)

The second Engineer reveals gun slinger Scout is trying to make it move and guffawing. The glove goes back on but part of Engineer’s issues about it are healed ❤️

Asks are always open!! Whoever this anon is I love you we should eat a raw fish together ripped from the sea

[my-blind-album]

Lady Leonora Lesso x Female Reader- School For Good & Evil

Pairing; Fem!Never!Student!Reader x Lady Leonora Lesso

Featuring Characters; Kiko, Clarissa Dovey, Momo (fairy), Beatrix, Tedros, Hester, Hort, Sophie, Anadil, Dot, Casandra 

Category; Fluff?

Warning(s); none

Summary; Y/n is sent to the school for good and meets people who she believes are her new found friends but meets those who might just be her enemy as well. But after a certain redhead peeks her interest she starts to try and seek her attention, however, along the way she discovers secrets about the schools of good and evil including all the dark truths about how the true ending of the fairy-tale stories really end...

??? POV

“What do you think? Lavender or Tulips?” the little fairy on my shoulder shakes their head and points towards the Tulip in my left hand. “You’re right Lavender isn’t even in my list of favourite flowers” I say putting down the flower till I felt a tug on my hair. Looking over to my shoulder I spot my fairy pointing towards something. “What is it Momo? Is it perhaps a Dandelion?, or a Rose! I love Roses” Momo tugs onto my hair harder pulling me towards the middle of the flower garden. “What’s wrong M-” Looking down I see a girl in a blue dress with white stripes on and clock signs on it as well. “Oh! Is she alright?” I ask Momo as she shrugs her shoulders. We hear a groaning sound and look over to the girl who was now on her feet rubbing her head. “What in the madness” looking up from the ground the girl notices my presence and that of Momo’s and screams in fear. Covering my ears as Momo flies her way over to the girl slapping her across the face and the girl then silences herself. “Who are you? And where the hell am I?” After a while it hits me and I realizes who she is. “Are you the daughter of Alice? In wonderland?” “Yes...how do you know that?” “Well you kinda dress like her” I say. “I’m Kiko!” I reach out my hand for her to shake and eyes it as I casually put my hand back down. “Sorry I don’t like contact” “It’s fine! I totally understand” the girl forms a small smile across her lips before turning back to her serious face. “I’m Dinah” “Well it’s nice to meet you Dinah,” I respond “Well to answer your question, this is The School For Good And Evil” “The what?” she says raising her eyebrows with her arms crossed. I sigh shaking my head softly. “Come with me, there’s a lot- to learn” Grabbing her forearm and dragging her over to the school for good with Momo resting on my shoulder. 

??? POV

A splash is heard as I watch my fellow friends land into the muddy and dirty water. Laughing at their disgust in their faces. “Really Y/n?” “How come you didn’t fall into the water like the rest of us?” I make my way over to my friends with a wide mischievous grin on my face and my eyes glowing green. “Um, well, it seems to me that you all have forgotten that my mom’s the Cheshire Cat- and cats don’t like water” One of my friends rolls their eyes at me “Watch it Redhead, I not afraid to leave a few marks” I threaten my mad hatter friend Maddie as I let my claws show and there shine in the little bit of light being shone. “Hey! no killing till graduation! So get your ass inside! Freaks!” Looking over a guard hushes us to enter the large dark building in front of us. “Wow”  my friend Elizabeth speaks looking up at the castle. “This is perfect~” “Let’s go inside shall we?” Carlos speaks up and we all silently agree making our inside. 

Around the room is a whole dark interior which is absolute stunning but unfortunately the people aren’t as stunning as the place seems. We receive a bunch of glares from the people inside of the room which is rather odd...and not in a good way. “My word, is it just me or are we a bit out of the ordinary here?” Elizabeth whispers loud enough for our group to hear. “Yeah, that’s usually normal over in Wonderland” Carlos replies while a bald girl with a reptile on her shoulder hisses at him. “Guess people aren’t mad over” I say.

 A boy with short black hair jumps in front on Elizabeth. “Hey there, me again” “Elizabeth, you know him?” Maddie asks as Elizabeth let’s out a sigh. I met him as I was getting out of the water and he wouldn’t stop trying to taste my hair saying it smells like tea” “Aw~ Look at that, the Princess Of Hearts had made a new friend” I tease receiving daggers from the pouting girl. “Put it there!” the boy says pulling his hand out for Elizabeth to shake. As she does and pulls her hand away the hand comes off and she screams in agony. “Ta-da!” the boy laughs out. “It’s cleaner than my own hand” he remarks and Elizabeth gags at the sentence and we all try to hold in our laughs watching the interaction between the two. “I’m Hort by the way!” he says with a smile never leaving his mouth. “Hort? that sounds like something you cough up!” Elizabeth spats out. Hort places a hand on his chest looking at Elizabeth with what seems like admiration. “That’s the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me” everyone except Hort and Elizabeth whizzes trying to keep in their laughter. “Argh, weirdo!” Elizabeth says pushing Hort to the side and walking away and I turn to Hort giving him a shrug and he shrugs back casually. 

“Well that a bit rude, Elizabeth” “Excuse me, Carlos if you were in my shoes you’d understand” I catch up with the group while looking at Elizabeth. “Well he seems-” “Weird?” she says “I would have chosen Joyful but weird fine too I guess?” I say sending her a teasing smirk and she glares at me about to say something till Maddie cuts her off mid-sentence. “Hey, do you think she’s in charge?” “I don’t know your a read head you talk to her, you know, redhead to redhead?” I say and she hits my shoulder aggressively. “Ouch!” “Oh, don’t be a pussy!” she says with a smirk and my eyes glow green but Carlos gets between us cooling down the tense atmosphere. “How about Y/n speaks to the Lady since she’s the only one who didn’t get launched into the water” he insists and everyone else agrees. And I sigh in defeat. “Fine” I whine making my way to the redhead in a trench coat. “Excuse-” “Excuse me, Ma’am!?” I was cut off by a blonde girl covered in mud who slightly pushed me over. Oh hell nah. 

The redhead turns around facing the blonde before she notices my figure making my way over to her. “With what am I in need of assistance of?” she asks with her eyes still on me. “There must be a mistake and I am in the wrong school!” the blonde says speaking sternly at the lady before her and I stare at her in shock, surprised by her boldness to speak at an authority figure in such a manner. The redhead eyes the blonde before speaking “Oh, how distressful and improbable, backup” she says using the cane in her hand to pushing the blonde away. Her attention then turns to me as she has her cane under my chin locking eyes me with her beautiful blue orbs. Wait, beautiful?! 

Waking up from my spacing out I look back at the redhead whose cane was still under my chin and eyes were still on me and like some sort of magnet they were dragging me in them. “And you?” “Uh- well, you see, my friends and I” I say leaning to the side so that the woman could get a view of my friends. “Are from Wonderland, and we aren’t sure where we are? why we and here and how to go back” I say calmly while keeping my eyes on the cane. Before a few minutes of what felt like forever, she removed the cane from chin and placing it firmly in her hand. “Well everything will be explained at the meeting being held later so before that I suggest you get prepared and get ready for your lessons that start tomorrow” she finishes. “Lessons?!” I scream in shock, I’m not a fan of school at all and most of time I’d skip my Wonderland lessons. “Yes, and don’t of even trying to miss a single class, or else I’ll have the pleasure of punishing you, Kitten~” I froze at the pet name and felt some type of heat inside of me especially on my cheeks and I see the woman smirk in front of me and I look at her confused, before I could ask she puts her finger on her lips hushing me and I reluctantly agree watching as she majestically leaves. 

The blonde girl who was next to me had already left and before I could move to go to my friends a giant wolf guard picks me up and drags me to a room which has the names; Hester, Anadil, Dot and below those names is my own Y/n. Sweet. 

Opening the door I watch as all the 3 girls look at me eyeing me up and down, especially the one in the middle with grey and red clothing who has black messy and scattered hair. “Look what the cat dragged in” she says and my let my claws out which causes all 3 girls to back up a bit surprised. “Watch it, or else this kitty might leaving some marks” the girl spits onto the ground near my feet and a spark lights. “Is that how you wanna do it?” I say running towards her with my claws ready to pounce before a curly haired, mixed skinned girl with chocolate in her hands and on her teeth jumps in front of me with her hands out. “Cool down Kitty Paws” the messy haired girl behind her sticks her tongue out and I purr back at her relaxing a bit as the chocolate girl rubs her hand on my head. “That’s a good kitty” she says and I purr with a smile on my face and my cheeks flushed red. She stops and puts her hand out.

 “I’m Dot, daughter of the Sheriff of Nottingham” taking her hand in mine we shake hands while exchanging smiles to each other “Y/n, daughter of the Cheshire Cat” her eyes lit up and she jumps franticly. “I knew it! I knew it! I told you guys!” she says to the girls behind her and they roll their eyes sarcastically. “Well, Y/n this is Anadil” she points towards a girl with a rat on her shoulder and on her hand and my eyes light up admiring the big and juicy creatures. Anadil surely notices and immediately hides her rats behind herself. “Hands off the rats!” I roll my eyes before agreeing. “And this little ray of shine is Hester” the messy haired girl steps forward “Daughter of the Wicked Witch” “Oh do you mean that old hag?” I smirk watching her expression fall to a pissed one “That hag! Is my mother” “Oh, I can tell, at least I know who will be the highest in Uglclification. She was about to hit me till the bell rang indicating it was time for the ceremony to start “Seems like it’s time for the ceremony, you see later, Little Witch” I spat out to Hester pushing her to the side and waving to Dot and eyeing Anadil’s rats as she tries desperately to hide them. 

Dinah’s POV

“And that’s basically everything you need to know about the schools for good and evil” Kiko finishes before taking a seat next to me on the benches. “Whoa, so this is where my mother used to school?” “Mhm, there’s even a secret Museum hidden among the walls, which is filled with each hero and villain’s items” “So do you think it has my mother’s bottle?” “Most probably” “Nice” Looking around I watch as the supposed Nevers enter the hall and take their seats and the benches till my eyes lock on a certain girl in purple. “What?” I turn to Kiko as she looks at me confused “You whispered ‘oh no’ under your breath” “Oh, well you see that girl in purple at the Nevers side?” I ask her pointing towards the Never girl and Kiko nods her head. “She’s Y/n and she’s the daughter of the Cheshire Cat” Kiko’s eyes lit up and she gasps. “So also got taken from Wonderland?” “Yeah and I think her friends are here as well” 

Y/n’s POV

Feeling a pair of eyes on me I look around trying to spot the culprit till my focus was pulled away by someone banging their cane onto the floorboard. On stage I spot the previous Redhead from before and next to her is and dark-skinned, golden dressed woman, with a cheerful smile on her mouth. “Well come new students! I’m Professor Dovey, Dean Of The School For Good” she bows gracefully as the Ever students begin to say chant. “Evers! Evers! Evers! Evers! Evers!” as their chanting they go quiet as the Redhead pops herself on the stage. “And I’m Lady Lesso, Dean Of The School For Evil” the Nevers say their own chant. “Kill you! Kill you! Kill you! Kill you! Kill you!” Wow aggressive much. After a while Professor Dovey gives a long as speech till the Ever-boys burst through the door with their swords fighting with one another. The Ever princesses scream in cheers as the Nevers groan in boredom and to be honest I felt the same and I knew Lady Lesso felt the same as I looked at her throught the corner of my eye and say her placing a hand on her forehead. I laugh at the sight and she raises her head to find the laughing culprit to be me and I quickly turned my head to the other direction. 

A boy swings down a rope and lands on the ground catching me off guard and he starts fighting with the other boys till their all ‘defeated’. The Ever princesses cheer and one of the girls who I couldn’t spot screamed out the boy’s name. “We love you, Tedros!” Weirdos. The Nevers are still groaning in boredom and Lesso looks for unimpressed then before and an idea clicks into my head as I get up from my seat making my way towards Tedros. We was about to launch a rose into the air at one of the girls till he turned his head back and his eyes locked with mine as I stood right behind. The room falls silent as everyone has a confused expression on their faces. “So I suppose you believe you know how to fight, Ever-boy” he smirks putting back the rose in his vest and turns to me crossing his arms. “I suppose I do, and what’s that gotta do with you? Never-girl” A dark chuckle escapes my lips as I walk towards one of the guards and take their weapon. The shrug towards Lady Lesso and she does the same confused but intrigued to see what I’ll do. “It’s been over 200 years since evil has won!” I scream facing the Nevers before turning back to Tedros “How about we break that cycle?” Waving my hands in the air, my previous outfit changes to my fighting attire. 

The Nevers cheer me on as I charge at Tedros and knock him onto the ground as he tries to catch his breathing I launch a swing at him but he takes his sword out and hits it on the ground and a force pushes me back, making me hit the ground. As a I groan in pain I hear loud screaming of complaints “Foul! Oh come on, anyone he has a magical sword!” I look around and spot my friends and Hort, surprisingly backing me up for the cheat Tedros made. I hear a flame above me and I look up to notice the weapon in hand turn to flames. ‘Make me proud, Kitten’ a voice says in my head and I look behind me and spot a smirking Lesso and I return the smirk to her before turning my attention to Tedros. “So wanna play with magic? Teddy boy” I swing the weapon around me till it point towards Tedros. “Sure let’s play with magic”

...To Be Continued...

Authors Note; By the way, in this series, Y/n is 18 years old and so are her friends and Dinah is 18 as well but all the other students are 16 because in Wonderland time is much more...well mad. 

Should I make a part 2 as well? Or should this be left like this and ya’ll can come up with your own story after that?

[take-a-cchonce]

Get Out of My Kitchen - Part 1/2

Dom!Louis x Sub!Harry

(T) (1.1k)

“Get out of my kitchen,”

Harry quickly stalked over, poking his finger into Louis’ ribs. “Lou, you’re- I’m trying to cook over here. Out of my kitchen. I mean it. Out. Take the whole bloody block of it if you must but don’t-” 

“Your kitchen, huh? Say that again,” Louis challenged, tilting his head to the side, a smirk tugging at the corner of his lips.

OR

The one where Harry has had it with his husband interrupting him, but he isn't having any of his cheek.

Tags: Established relationship, canon, Louis overreacting, Dom!Louis X Sub!Harry (mildly at the end), tw swearing, tw sexual implications, harry’s bald ig?

“Could you please not?” Harry huffed out as Louis bumped against him for the third time in the last five minutes, leaning up to get a mug from the cupboard for the shorter man, handing it to him with a grimace. “ ‘S my last cuppa,” Louis said solemnly, widening his eyes at the younger man, well aware he would be back in a few minutes. 

“It was supposed to be the last cookie. And the last spoonful of dough. And-”

“Alright, alright, don’t get your panties all in a twist, lad,” Louis chuckled, shooting Harry a shit-eating grin as he purposely bumped into him on his way out, ducking out of the doorway with a yelp when Harry reached out with flour covered hands. “The game’s back on. And- there’s smoke coming from the oven,” He pointed out, sticking his head back in, laughing under his breath as Harry rushed over and brought out a large pan of slightly too-brown cake. 

“Oh that looks great, if a little burnt. Don’t mind if I do,” Louis chuckled, walking back in and riffling through the drawers for a fork. “I very much do mind, Lewis.” Harry narrowed his eyes at the older man, slapping his hand away when he reached for the cake, “It’s for dessert this evening. Now, go,” He said through gritted teeth, bodily pushing his husband out of the room, ignoring his pleas and protests.

Harry sighed as he laid the cake on the cooling rack, making a note to shave off the browned exterior. He loved having the rest of the boys over, loved cooking for them, and loved Louis even more, but his husband was a handful sometimes, he thought, chuckling internally. He cracked the window open, letting some of the smoke out as he got working on the petit fours, putting some strawberries in a bowl full of cold water as he whipped up some cream, humming a little tune to himself. 

Barely ten minutes had passed and Louis had already made two more trips into the kitchen, one to fill up his mug again and another to put a bag of popcorn into the microwave. He hadn’t exactly said anything to Harry, but Harry knew exactly what he was up to and made sure to squint at him in the most intimidating way he could (which wasn’t too intimidating, apparently, considering how the older man always burst into laughter at his expression).

He was grating up some parmesan onto the lasagna he had already layered with ricotta and mozzarella, thoughts lingering jokingly on how much easier his life would be, not if Louis could actually come and help (he was a hopeless romantic, but not that hopeful) but if he didn’t have to practically fend Louis off like- like he used to fend off Dusty when he would pile food into her dish. He giggled to himself at the absurd image of Louis as a cat that popped up in his mind, quickly glancing at the clock. They still had a while before the boys would come, and knowing them, they wouldn’t exactly be on the minute. 

Harry was wrapping up the parmesan and placing it in the fridge but he turned and saw Louis standing by the tray, shreds of cheese stuck to his fingers as he quickly hid them, looking like a child caught stealing cookies and for one moment Harry had the irrational urge to burst into laughter- but that quickly dissipated when Louis pinched some more cheese up, holding his gaze insolently as he put it in his mouth. 

“Get out of my kitchen,”

Harry quickly stalked over, poking his finger into Louis’ ribs. “Lou, you’re- I’m trying to cook over here. Out of my kitchen. I mean it. Out. Take the whole bloody block of it if you must but don’t-” 

“Your kitchen, huh? Say that again,” Louis challenged, tilting his head to the side, a smirk tugging at the corner of his lips.

“Get. Out. Of. My-”

Harry stopped midway, words disappearing from his mind as Louis came up to him, locking both his wrists in a single fluid motion, gripping them tightly on either side as he locked him against his own body. The expression on Louis’ face could only be described as hungry, and Harry shivered slightly, the cold edge of the counter digging into his waist where his shirt had ridden up.

Louis tutted, dramatically raising an eyebrow, “You’re asking me to get out? In that tone? ‘S not a very nice thing to say. I’m just here trying to show how much I appreciate your cooking and you’re being… so rude,” Louis sighed deeply and despite his nonchalant tone, Harry almost felt the atmosphere in the room shift and it sent a bolt of arousal through him. 

Harry was in half a mind to be mouthy, break out of his grip and talk back to him, it wouldn’t have been an effort at all; but one look at Louis’ face, pupils already blown wide, swallowing the blue around them, jaw set as he pouted slightly had him reconsider, slipping easily into their roles. “I- I was just- wanted to cook well and yo-” 

“Y’know, we have about an hour.” Louis interrupted, the soft smile on his face completely at odds with his tone, leaning in until his lips were close enough to Harry’s ear for him to feel his warm breath, causing goosebumps to run down his side. “I don’t want excuses, love. You were using your mouth too much…” he tutted, lifting Harry’s chin with his finger to catch his gaze.

Harry had unknowingly trapped his bottom lip between his teeth and Louis gently pushed at it with his thumb, still intently staring at the younger man. “Would’ve liked to just bend you over right here, use that fucking spoon on you- show you what you get for talking back,” he whispered, tongue darting out to wet his lips and Harry’s gaze caught on them, feeling blood rush south, knees weak as he already regretted not thinking before he spoke, feeling a tingle of excitement despite the apprehension swirling in his gut.

“Eyes up here.” Louis said shortly, “Bedroom, now. You have exactly five minutes, y’know what to do,” He brushed his thumb across Harry’s lips, the unsaid ‘or else’ hanging heavy in the air, smirking as he walked out of the kitchen, leaving Harry struggling to catch his breath as he rushed off, all thoughts of cooking out the window.

Part 2 here

Or

Read on AO3

[thatonebirdwrites]

I originally had parts of this tale from Lena's POV, but then decided it was better to stay in Kara's POV. I wanted to also show how DID can make a person's behavior seem inconsistent in the mood and behavioral changes. Internally, it is consistent as each alter has a specific way of behaving, thinking, and expressing themself. But to an outsider who doesn't know about DID, it may seen confusing.

EXCERPT:

Kara's Tale Part 3

One of Kara's professors told her that stories weave people together. Through the shared experience of a tale, people understand, hope is built, and a new landscape grows. With truth (shokh) so out of reach due to her secret, Kara adapts to the realm of stories. She devours books at the library, reads magazines by the armload, and stitches together an understanding of Western America's version of story-telling. Digging further embroils her in storytelling throughout cultures, each a different flavor, and hold markedly different techniques from another. And yet, all shine with overlapping concepts rooted in humanity's tendency toward cooperation, curiosity, care, and control.

Within such vaulted halls of writing, Kara Danvers accepts the junior journalist position from Cat Grant.

"Finally. Will get you out of my hair." Cat waves her toward the bullpen. "Shoo. You're Snapper's problem now." A smile creases her stern face despite her dismissive words. Being Cat's assistant had been a stressful job. Cat constantly pushed her in ways that made her anxious. Often fails to call her by her correct name half the time — Kara thinks it was some sort of weird powerplay that humans do — but she always does right by Kara. This is no different.

Snapper Carl hunches as if caught in an eternal stooping to examine covers. He nibbles on a cigar, but it's never lit, and his balding hair is slicked back. His sleeves are perpetually rolled to his elbows regardless of weather. When Kara walks up to him to greet him as a junior reporter, he pulls a silver pocketwatch from his vest pocket and taps it. "Late, kiddo. Go talk to James and Siobhan. Get me a write up on the artists at that ridiculous fashion convention."

"Will do." Kara blinks at him, confused. She expected training like her first day as Cat's assistant. When he glares at her and taps his watch again, she hurries across the bullpen to where James stands by the copier. "Hey, Snapper said you'd help me out?"

"Kara, you took the role?" James grins and slaps her shoulder. "Glad you're joining us. Let me show you your desk, and let's get started on that fashion convention."

Kara has superspeed, but this whirlwind spins her out of calibration. Her first few days are a crash course in journalism. She hopes to do investigative journalism, but Snapper takes one look at her, grunts, and tells her to earn it first. She helps James and Siobhan cover the convention, sets up her desk, and sits in as a participant in the daily meetings, rather than just a note-taker. It feels liberating almost, and it gives her a healthy distraction from her simmering resentment toward Kal.

She checks her phone often, but Lena does not text. At some point, she receives a text from Alex instead, and guilt saturates her. Technically, Kara-Z and Alex fought, but Kara-D knows Alex won't accept that excuse.

[bonefall]

how does the fire scene play out in your redux?

Had a whole thing written out and Tumblr crashed and deleted my post again :/ take 2

The Fire Scene's one of those things that, because of a bunch of my reduxes, can't exist the way that it does in canon.

Adopted kits are valued just as much as regular kits ergo she can't have a reverse psychology "Ok fine kill them it won't hurt me" moment. The Queen's Rights also means that she did not have a social obligation to reveal the father of her kits (though many cats in the clan will think it was a dick move she didn't tell Bramble)

But I do need to preserve Ashfur's motivation that he's scorned by her rejecting him. It's important that he wants to possess and hurt her because he is an incel... though, I do want to weave in something about the "Kin of your Kin" prophecy reaching him and adding an element that they should be dead because their power could threaten ThunderClan (which is from my Villain Thornclaw AU, and imo a much better motivation behind the Fire Scene in general. Especially since it connects thematically to The Broken Code.)

Fragments, rough outline:

-I'm going to change the logistics a bit; Squirrelflight is trying to push a tree down for the Three to climb up. Ashfur interrupts this action

-"My quarrel is with you!" They brawl here, Ash wants to force her to watch her kids die

-I'm thinking she lets loose the secret to disarm him for a moment, "ok. kill them. they aren't my kits so i dont care" "Wait-- what? Wait! No you're lying you turned around go go back into th-" SQUILF KICKKK

-Maybe she even kicked him so hard she launched him into the tree, knocking it over. Girlboss. let my cats do anime battles

-This is when the three start coming up the tree, but Ash obviously is trying to stop that. Lionblaze gets to run up and slap his bald head

-Lion can have a moment here, if it's fitting, that he isn't capable of killing Ash and feels ashamed of his monstrous powers. He was his mentor-- in this rewrite, a mentor is emotionally like another parent. He's overwhelmed by hurt, betrayal, and thinks back to all the things Ashfur did that hurt him

-In general I really need to hammer out what their mentor/apprentice dynamic was like, and how it affected Lionblaze's personality. Thinking about it now, it's super important for this scene

-hmm... maybe I can tie the prophecy-motivation back in here, and have THIS be the moment where they logically work out Leafpool is their parent. "They aren't Squilf's kits, BUT Lionblaze obviously has star powers, so they must be Kin of Firestar's Kin through someone else! Ergo the only logical choice is LEAFPOOL"

-but like... y'know, less smartly worded.

-Anyway Ashfur runs. This is also the last story beat in Hollyleaf's Po3 arc; the last betrayal she can take before she begins her villain descent.

Post-Fire Consequences:

-Ashfur... he can't just walk off scot free, in any case, Firestar or Bramblestar (depending on if Firestar is dead yet) wouldn't let an attempted murderer stay in the Clan

-Maybe Hollyleaf kills him purely out of revenge? For how he hurt his mom, his brother, how he threatened his family. she deserves a lil revenge tbhhh

-Maybe Firestar died somewhere else during the fire and killing Ashfur right now could look like part of the same murder. Especially since Fire could have "black fur" in his claws too because Breezepelt does it. (tfw you and your evil half-bro are drowning two guys in the same creek and there's an awkward silence /j)

-When Brambleclaw/star finds out, he's upset that Squilf lied to him. That's understandable. If he's -Star by this point, he demotes her as deputy immediately because he can no longer trust her and she helped conceal a crime.

-ThunderClan is NOT completely in favor of this. Opinions are super mixed; some agree that a leader has to be able to trust their deputy. Others say Squilf was upholding the warrior code by protecting the kits. Others think it's fair for Bramble to be mad, but that Squilf was the best choice for a deputy and his personal anger is clouding his decision (a sign of a bad leader)

-Overall though, Bramble's reputation takes the larger hit here. The Thistle Law-leaning supporters who don't respect the Queen's Rights didn't like Squirrelflight politically to begin with.

-Also this is the beginning of the end of Bramblesquirrel in my rewrite. She never gets back with him romantically after how he acts in Bonefall OotS, though she does, briefly, consider it in Squirrelflight's Horror. (I think the title of that redux says everything about how 'Great' of an idea that is.)

So In Conclusion

This is the second-to-last major conflict of Bonefall Po3 before we end the arc and go to Bonefall OotS, and the widely accepted end of the Power Era as Inter-Clan political relationships sour, with no proper Fire Alone leadership to smooth tensions.

I would like to have one final Clan battle after the Fire Scene to set that up, after which Hollyleaf vanishes into the tunnels. If I was renaming the books of each arc (which I haven't yet just because none of my outlines are truly detailed enough yet to really outline 6 individual books), Sunrise would become Cruel Season.

In Cruel Season, we also get the birth of Jayfeather's kits, adopted by Lionblaze in a parallel to Leafpool.

Feel free to leave suggestions and feedback on parts that are good, and what's not working about this. It's still WIP territory.

[t-errifier]

slaps him on his bald ass head, from t-errificd but i'm hated

𝐇𝐈𝐒 𝐍𝐄𝐂𝐊 𝐂𝐑𝐀𝐂𝐊𝐒 𝐓𝐎 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐒𝐈𝐃𝐄 𝐀𝐓 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐂𝐄, SIENNA has certainly never held back when it comes to their little games. his head tilts to the side, little black top hat only holding on by a string; it's hanging down in his face. bringing both his hands up theatrically, he fixes the hat as any distinguished gentleman would - with grace. holding it by the rims on both sides, he returns it to it's rightful position. ART is giving her quite the stink - eye. his usual cheerful grin is replaced with a mournful frown. pain is only fun when he is the one inflicting it. alas, he lacks his tools of the trade at the moment. not that he hadn't been one to use bare hands before, but he knows that this one is a fighter. she wouldn't go down so easily, especially not without any means to bring her there.

turning on his heel, he sucks in air; making a prissy - face. one that showed he was willing to stoop down to her level. cat fight? so be it. he pulls his hand back & delivers a meaningful slap to SIENNA'S CHEEK. if she wishes to go back & forth like this, then he will rise to the challenge.