#back and settled after the holiday weekend with my family | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

ylangelegy · 7 days ago

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babe for the weekend ❄️ soonyoung x reader.

Everybody thought that you and Kwon Soonyoung were a foregone conclusion, but then he had to go and change the ending. Six years after the breakup, he decides to come home for the holidays— and now, you’re stuck between your pride, his dreams, and the road not taken. ‘Tis the damn season, indeed.

୨ৎ pairing: dance studio ceo!soonyoung x lawyer!f!reader. ୨ৎ genre/warnings: hurt/comfort, angst, romance. alternate universe: non-idol. mentions of food, alcohol consumption, swearing/cussing. post-breakup dynamics and quarter-life crises. high school lovers to exes. law terms. spiteful reader. rated T for languages and themes. title and synopsis shamelessly reference taylor swift's t'is the damn season. ୨ৎ word count: 16.6k ୨ৎ footnotes: this is part of @camandemstudios's winter with you collaboration! ´◡` thank you so much for trusting me with soonyoung. also eternally grateful to @shinwonderful and @biniaiahs for beta reading. may revisit this to do edits in the future, but for now, we settle.

in the words of a, i am the 'harbringer of doom and angst.' happy holidays, everyone! + tag list in the comments.

⋆˚ 𝜗𝜚˚⋆ winter with you masterlist ┆ my masterlist ┆ the official babe for the weekend playlist.

This has to be the universe’s idea of a joke.

It’s like the time your professor refused to round up your grade in college and you almost got set back a semester. Or that one day at work, where the forecast said it would be sunny— only for you to get caught in a downpour on your way home.

The universe had to be an aspiring amateur comedian, because why else would Kwon Soonyoung be in front of you right now?

“What?” Soonyoung chirps. “No ‘hello’ for your favorite ex?”

Six years. It’s been six years since you last saw each other, and those are the opening words he decides to go with.

You’re torn between smacking him upside on the head and strangling him. Maybe both, you muse, as you survey the ways he’s changed over time.

His hair is blonde now. His once-pale skin is a little more tan. And— as much as you loathe to admit it— he looks more fit. You can vaguely make out the muscles straining underneath his casual wear.

Dancer’s build, you begrudgingly concede.

When Soonyoung calls you out in a bid to snap you out of your daydream, you physically flinch. Your name still rolls right off his tongue like honey. You don’t have the right to call me that, a small, bitter voice says in the back of your mind. You don’t have the right to talk to me at all.

“Hellooo,” he sing-songs, waving one of his palms inches away from your face. “Did you have a stroke or something?”

That prompts you to speak.

After all that time, your first words to Soonyoung in six years are cold and curt: “Get out.”

A corner of Soonyoung’s mouth twitches upward. The infuriating bastard. He probably anticipated a reaction like this from you.

He straightens until he can shove his hands into the pockets of his winter coat. “I don’t see any signs that say I’m not allowed to be here,” he says. “Did I miss it?”

He makes a whole show of looking around your family’s restaurant. A part of you is grateful that you’re the only one on today’s shift; your parents would’ve undoubtedly had over-the-top reactions to Soonyoung’s sudden reappearance. It’s only through years of conditioning that you’ve learned to keep your reactions under control, even when the world throws you curveballs such as these.

Your expression is perfectly blank as you dryly note, “There’s a sign out on the front, actually.”

“Oh? Really?”

“Yeah. No strays allowed.”

Soonyoung shakes his head. “Brutal,” he says, but there’s still that hint of a smile on his face.

If you strained your ears, you might hear the trace of affection in his tone. The thought of it— of Soonyoung holding any sort of fondness for you— makes you want to scream.

You manage to tamp that urge in favor of jerking your head towards the front door of the restaurant. “Out,” you repeat, your gaze briefly flickering to the CCTV in the corner of the store.

Your father would probably kill you if he found out you were turning someone away. A supposed family friend, at that. But this wasn’t just a customer, and you weren’t sure if you could still call Soonyoung a friend, and it’s been six years, damn it.

“Is that any way to treat a customer?” Soonyoung goads.

“You’re not a customer.”

“You haven’t given me the chance to be.”

“That’s because you’re not welcome here.”

“It’s pretty bad for business that—”

That wasn’t going to fly. You weren’t about to take business advice from Kwon Soonyoung of all people.

One minute, you’re behind the counter with your hands clenched into fists. The next, you’ve closed the space between you and Soonyoung. He falters as you approach, looking almost like he’s holding his breath.

It’s not a slap that greets him. Most definitely not a hug, either.

Instead, one of your hands dart out until you’ve got a firm grip on his ear.

Soonyoung is still taller than you, but he folds over at your rough tug. “Ow, ow, ow!” he screeches, his own hands flying out of his pockets in a futile attempt to either push you off or shield himself.

In his split second of indecision, you manage to haul him back over to the entrance. Because you had been manning the fort, you hadn’t even noticed that it had started to snow. The first of the year.

You don’t have the time to appreciate it. Your focus is entirely on channeling your energy to shove Soonyoung out of the restaurant. He stumbles out on the sidewalk where he rubs his offended ear with a scandalized expression on his face.

A lesser man might have snapped back, might have demanded an explanation for being manhandled so shamelessly. To your sheer annoyance, Soonyoung only laughs.

It’s a full-bodied sound, one that practically bounces off the street. He laughs, and he laughs, and he laughs, clutching at his stomach like this is the funniest thing in the world.

Remember how, earlier, you thought you might scream? Now, you truly almost do. Because the years have passed— but Soonyoung still laughs exactly the same.

You don’t stick around to find out if you do end up yelling. Instead, you march right back into the restaurant with your chin jut up in a show of confidence. You can hear him trying to choke out words between his laughing fit, something akin to, “Hey, wait—,” but you’re not about to hear him out.

Not today, not ever.

It’s the most satisfying feeling in the world, getting to slam the door in his face.

“Why did you come home?”

“I got hungry.”

“ — tried to give me business advice! Me, business advice!”

You punctuate your exclamation with a slap to your office table. Jihoon and Wonwoo are a little too familiar with your fits of passion to be surprised; Wonwoo barely looks up from his round of Block Blast, while Jihoon only shakes his head.

“Sounds like something he would do,” Jihoon offers empathetically.

You lean back into your chair, your expression contorted into one of utter frustration. The three of you rarely meet in your office, but you had called a DEFCON 1 situation in light of recent events. Jihoon and Wonwoo lounged leisurely in front of you as you ranted your heart away for the past thirty or so minutes.

“Who does he think he is?” you seethe. “Showing up here unannounced!”

Wonwoo pipes up. “It wasn’t unannounced.”

Jihoon silences Wonwoo with a warning glare. You can only glance between the two boys before Jihoon heaves out a sigh and admits, “We knew that he was coming back to visit.”

The look of betrayal on your face must be clear as day, because Wonwoo guiltily pauses his game to flash you a sheepish grin. “We met up with him— yesterday, was it?”

Yesterday. “And you didn’t tell me?!” Your voice is a little shrill and a whole lot incredulous.

Ever the pragmatic one, Jihoon quips, “You’ve always said that you want nothing to do with him. I presumed that involved knowing whether or not he was coming home.”

Damn it. Jihoon got you there.

You’re not sure what you would’ve even done, really, if you’d been given a heads up. Would you have boarded up the doors to your home? Would you have sought him out yourself in a prideful bid to maintain some twisted sort of upper hand?

You’re still mulling it over when Wonwoo delicately says, “Look at the bright side. You probably won’t run into him again.”

Jihoon attempts to distract you by getting you to talk about your most recent client— a stubborn chicken shop significantly behind on mortgage payments. You give in, if only because you want so very badly to believe in Wonwoo’s words.

You should’ve known better, really, because of course your friends would lie to you.

That’s the only thought on your mind as you keep your eyes firmly ahead and away from the smirking blonde in your peripheral vision. Already, you’re contemplating the bodily harm you’ll cause Jihoon and Wonwoo for leaving out this vital piece of information.

But you can’t be wrathful. Not in front of the kids.

The gaggle of twenty-something elementary students sit cross-legged on the floor, their gazes all trained on the newcomer. They’re whispering excitedly among themselves, so much so that Teacher Kang has to clap more than thrice to recapture their attention.

“Now, everyone,” Teacher Kang announces. “Do you remember what I said about having a very special guest for today?”

A high-pitched chorus of “Yes, Teacher Kang,” resounds throughout the auditorium.

“Very good. Can we please give a warm welcome to Teacher Kang’s friend, Soonyoung?”

Soonyoung makes his way to the front of the gaggle with an easy grin and a relaxed gait, like he belongs here. And maybe a part of him does. This was his turf once, too.

“‘Soonyoung’ is a bit long, isn’t it?” he says, speaking to both Teacher Kang and the kids in front of them. It’s a small grace that he isn’t calling you out just yet, though you wouldn’t put him past it.

“Everybody!” Soonyoung proclaims. There’s a bit of a flourish in how he moves, how he looks down at the awe-stricken kids with a bright, wide smile. He puts up one hand to his face and bends his fingers in an imitation of a paw. “You can call me Hoshi!”

The kids echo it back to him— “Teacher Hoshi!” “Hello, Mr. Hoshi!” “What’s a Hoshi?”— while Teacher Kang only smiles fondly. For your part, you keep your expression perfectly controlled, even though you’re telepathically trying to get Soonyoung to combust.

It’s one thing for him to waltz back into your life like it’s nothing. It’s another thing for him to come around and introduce himself with the pet name you used to have for him.

Suddenly, you’re teenagers again, visiting the zoo on a field trip. The two of you had tried so hard to hide from your chaperones that you were holding hands in the pockets of your winter coats. In hindsight, it had been the most obvious thing in the world.

Soonyoung had excitedly pointed out the Bengal tigers lounging in their enclosure, and you joked about how similar he looked to them. 호랑이의 시선. Horangi-ui siseon, the tiger’s gaze.

Soon after, you took to calling him Hoshi when he was on stage, when the two of you were arguing over something petty, when you wanted to be affectionate. Hoshi, let’s get ice cream today. Hoshi, take me to the library. Hoshi, I love you!

Something that was once yours alone was now everybody else’s, too. It bothers you more than you care to admit.

You’re so caught up in reminiscing that you almost miss Teacher Kang saying, “Soonyoung— er, Hoshi— is going to help us with the Christmas showcase. He’s a very popular dancer in Seoul, so we’re happy to have him here.”

The betrayal that rises up within you is sharp albeit short-lived. Teacher Kang didn’t owe you a warning the same way that, say, Jihoon or Wonwoo might’ve. But still. Any indication at all would have been nice.

One of the younger students— an absolute sweetheart by the name of Iseul— tugs at your pant leg. You lean down so she can cup her little hand over your ear.

“Do you know Mr. Hoshi?” she whispers conspiratorially.

How fitting, for a five-year-old to pose the million-won question. It’s a loaded gun of a query even though there’s technically no right or wrong answer.

Of course you knew ‘Mr. Hoshi’. Your mothers were best friends. The two of you were in the same classes. You dated him throughout high school. You knew him well, like the back of your hand.

That was before he got up and left without so much of a glance over his shoulder, though.

You give Iseul a tight-lipped smile. “I knew him once,” you answer. It’s not quite the truth, but it will have to do for now.

“Why did you come home?”

“Took a wrong turn and ended up here.”

“Are you going to ignore me the whole time, or…?”

You answer Soonyoung’s prodding by ignoring him.

The past week has been largely uneventful, sans Soonyoung’s occasional effort to poke his nose into your business. He at least had the decency to not show up at your family’s restaurant again, and whether or not he knows of your office is yet to be seen.

Your interactions with him have been largely limited to the one-hour a day that you’ve dedicated to Yangjeong Elementary School.

Yangjeong was yet another thing that the two of you shared. You were once a pig-tailed menace who outran all the boys on the playground, and Soonyoung was your snot-nosed partner-in-crime.

Planning Yangjeong’s Christmas showcase has been your yearly commitment for as long as you can remember. Even when you were off at college, you had made it a point to set aside time for it. Volunteers have come and gone throughout the past, though this year’s volunteer was undeniably one of the more annoying ones.

“You’re going to have to talk to me eventually, you know.” Soonyoung practically flops himself onto the desk in front of you, the sudden weight of him making the table creak. As you turn your face away, you catch sight of the pout beginning to form on his lips.

You almost snipe at him, something along the lines of stop that or grow up or that doesn’t work on me anymore. You hold your tongue, in favor of wordlessly getting up to move to a different chair.

Soonyoung is right. You will have to talk to him soon enough.

But as you sit as far away from him as possible, readying yourself for the day ahead, you can at least decide that today will not be that day.

Preparations for the showcase involve discussing the program with the teachers and readying the students for their performances. It’s never anything spectacular— just your run-of-the-mill rotation of tone-deaf singing and middling dances— but the town’s overzealous parents are always more than happy to indulge the show.

Today, you and Soonyoung are set to meet with Teacher Kang to discuss the showcase’s overarching theme.

The sixty-something-year-old woman had been your teacher as well, and so it’s understandable why she’s eyeing the pair of you with poorly concealed amusement. There’s a palpable tension between you and Soonyoung, though a significant majority of the awkwardness is likely from your end.

“Have the two of you not kept in touch?” Teacher Kang asks as she sets down two mugs— coffee for you, hot chocolate for Soonyoung.

“No,” the two of you say simultaneously.

Soonyoung steals an all-too obvious glance. You keep your eyes on the coffee in front of you.

Teacher Kang— bless her heart— decides not to push it. She settles in her own seat, her hands wrapped around a cup of tea.

“The principal wants all the kids to do a number. Nothing too flashy, but something that will give everyone a chance to be on stage.” The elderly teacher sips at her drink before going on. “That’s why I called you in, Soonyoung.”

“I’m the reinforcements,” he jokes.

Teacher Kang gives a short laugh in response. “Something like that.”

She turns to you, then, with that same motherly simper that you’ve never been able to say ‘no’ to. You wonder if she’s doing this on purpose— pulling all the stops to get you to agree to what she’s going to say next.

“I know your hands are going to be full with the program and the staffing,” she starts. “But you’ll work with Soonyoung, won’t you?”

What kind of person would you be if you said ‘no’? If you threw a fit and demanded for Soonyoung to be thrown out?

“Of course,” you say, the word gritted out through your teeth.

At your side, Soonyoung lets out a loud cough to disguise his grumble of ‘bullshit’. You fight the urge to kick him in the shins.

The beguiling expression on Teacher Kang’s face is merciless. At this point, she’s no longer hiding the way that she’s watching you and Soonyoung’s heatless bickering. And when she comments on it, when she says “You two haven’t changed,” you almost walk out then and there.

I’ve changed, you want to insist. He’s changed. We’re both changed; we had to.

Otherwise, it wouldn’t have been worth it. The breakup, the distance, all of it.

Soonyoung recovers before you do.

“Ah, before I forget!” He digs for something in his pants pocket, which he eventually holds out for Teacher Kang. “You asked me for this, the last time we saw each other.”

Despite yourself, you can’t help but try and crane your neck to catch sight of what had been handed over. Soonyoung catches the small shift and huffs out a laugh.

“You could just ask, you know,” he says, reaching back into his pocket.

Your protest of “I don’t—” is cut off by him shoving the same thing in your hand. Your fingers close around the calling card bearing the illustration of a tiger and a string of unfamiliar numbers.

Hoshi, A.K.A Kwon Soonyoung, it also says. Chief Executive Officer, Eye of the Tiger Dance Studio. B1, 47, Dogok-ro 27-Gil, Gangnam-Gu, Seoul.

“So you know where to find me,” he says with the world’s most obnoxious smirk.

“Why did you come home?”

“I forgot something.”

“From six years ago?”

“From six years ago.”

Everybody thought that you and Soonyoung were a foregone conclusion.

It had been your stereotypical small town romance. You were kids together and then you were teenagers together. Some might have blamed it on forced proximity, but you like to think that the attraction and affection was real. That it wasn’t a matter of not having any other choice.

You had chosen Soonyoung happily. He had chosen you right back.

After an awkward dance of ‘will-they-won’t-they,’ the two of you started dating in your freshman year of high school. It was the type of thing that had everybody— your respective families, your mutual friends— breathing a sigh of relief. Something akin to finally.

For nearly four years, Soonyoung was it for you.

He was the one walking you home, the one you messed around with behind the library building. The two of you shared nearly every first that mattered. Every first that a high schooler could afford, anyway.

First date.

First kiss.

And, so it goes— first heartbreak.

Soonyoung had worn his heart on his sleeve; it was abundantly clear to everyone what he cared about. Two things in particular defined him: You, and dancing.

If you really tried, you can still remember the first time that Soonyoung had choreographed a dance himself. He had been young, scrappy, hungry— all the qualities that made it possible for him to tear up the stage and leave the rest of you in awe.

He went on to be president of your school’s modern dance club. He went on to compete, both in groups and by himself, and win.

You picked up on it, too, if only to indulge him. The two of you had your fair share of semi-viral dance covers and podium finishes at local contests. It was yet another testament to your partnership, to what everyone presumed would spell out endgame.

Except you only loved to dance, while Soonyoung lived for it.

“Come with me,” he had invited you the night before your high school graduation.

The two of you were supposed to be in bed, but your phone buzzed underneath your pillow and you couldn’t resist one last act of rebellion. You climbed out your window and met up with Soonyoung at your typical halfway point— the derelict playground the two of you have long since grown out of.

“To where?” you asked, your sandaled feet dragging through the sand beneath the swing. Uncharacteristically, Soonyoung hadn’t kicked off at all, instead opting to remain still.

His fingers had been tightly clenched around the rusting chain of the dated swing. You remember that much. In hindsight, he looked nervous.

There is a timeline where he might have proposed to you that night, might have asked for an early hand in marriage, with how on edge he was acting.

But, instead, you had prompted, “Have you finally decided on a uni?”

A beat.

His voice— soft and vulnerable— broke the silence of the February evening. “I’m not going to uni.”

You should have stopped swinging, then. Should have ground to a halt and grabbed Soonyoung by the shoulders. Should have called him crazy, insane.

Maybe you should have asked him to reconsider. That might have changed things.

Except you only kept on pushing. Back, forth. Back, forth. Like this was just a normal conversation and not a relationship-defining, life-altering moment for the two of you.

“I’m going to Seoul,” he elaborated, desperate to fill your silence. “I’m going to try and be a dancer. You— you could, too.”

Your answer was immediate. “I’m not as good as you.”

“You are,” he argued. A muscle in his jaw jumped, then. You’d known him for long enough to recognize his little tells and ticks, and that had been one of them. An indicator of a lie.

“I’m not.” You kept swinging, kept your face angled away from your boyfriend who was slipping through your fingers. “I’m going to uni, Soonyoung.”

“But—”

“But what?”

You’ll never admit this, but you had been cruel back then. You know that now.

There are things you would have done differently. You wouldn’t have snapped. You would have looked at him.

You were young, though, and angry. Your heart had been shattering in your chest and the only thing you could do was go back and forth on that creaking swing as Soonyoung tried to get through to you.

It hadn’t been that much of a surprise. Soonyoung’s general disinterest in college applications— and his constant rumblings about city life— had given you some idea of what his plans might be.

You just thought you would be more involved in it. That you wouldn’t be simply handed the decision, as if it were something you would have to accept.

Young, angry, and selfish to boot.

“Nothing.” Soonyoung eventually said. His words sounded like a concession, like some form of twisted acceptance. “You’ll go to uni.”

“And you’ll go to Seoul.”

In your peripheral vision, you had seen Soonyoung tilt his head away as if trying to hide his face from you. Six years is a long time ago. You can’t tell if he had cried, or maybe you’ve chosen to erase that from your memory.

“I’ll go,” Soonyoung repeated, an edge of defeat in his tone.

You swung, and swung, and swung, like it was the only thing keeping you tethered.

Back, forth. Back, forth.

The quiet had stretched, giving you a chance, an opportunity. To convince him otherwise. To change your own mind.

But—

“And I’ll stay,” you had responded.

That’s the thing about endings: They’re susceptible to change.

The first civil words you utter to Soonyoung are “Yeah, I think the kids will enjoy Santa Claus Is Coming to Town.”

He’d been spewing out prospects for the showcase’s group dance, though each idea had to be delicately shot down by Teacher Kang. Jingle Bell Rock? Performed three years ago. Baby, It’s Cold Outside? Perhaps not the most appropriate for children.

You can see from a mile away, the signs of Soonyoung’s growing frustration— the downturn of his lips, the furrow of his brows. When he recommends the Maria Carey classic, you throw him a bone. Just to try and wipe that look off his face.

You immediately regret your kindness, because Soonyoung’s head whips around and he looks at you with the most disbelieving, wide-eyed expression. You return the overreaction with a half-hearted glare.

“What?” you ask defensively.

“It’s—” He pauses, his eyes flicking to Teacher Kang. “Nothing, nothing.”

His jaw ticks. All that time apart and he’s still never learned how to get better at lying.

You don’t have to poke and prod to know what’s coming. Once your little meeting draws to a close— Teacher Kang eventually agreeing with Santa Claus Is Coming to Town— Soonyoung makes a beeline for your side, his excitement barely concealed.

“Is the world ending?” he asks you.

You attempt to shoulder past him, but he only follows you out of the classroom, sticking to your side. “You said we would have to talk eventually,” you point out. “Here’s your ‘eventually’. Don’t be too happy about it.”

“But I am happy about it,” he responds, his tone almost like that of a whining puppy. “Not too much. Just an appropriate amount.”

So help me, God.

You keep your gaze ahead as you walk out of the school. Soonyoung matches your pace, humming underneath his breath. You better watch out, you better not cry. You better not pout, I’m tellin’ you why.

Once the two of you are out the front doors of the school, you’re greeted to a light dusting of snow on Namyangju’s sidewalks.

“So,” Soonyoung says casually as you pull out your phone to check the weather for the rest of the day. “You don’t work full-time at your parents’ restaurant, do you?”

Involuntarily, a derisive snort of laughter escapes you. “Small talk? Really?”

There’s a boyish grin on Soonyoung’s face. “Gotta take advantage of you being chatty,” he shoots back, which only prompts you to shake your head.

You could ignore him, like you always have. You probably should. That had always been Soonyoung’s style.

Give him an inch and he’ll take a mile.

And yet—

“No,” you grumble, your eyes still absentmindedly scanning your weather app. “I only work at the restaurant part-time.”

“The rest of the time?”

“I didn’t realize this was going to be a talk show.”

“Haven’t you heard? I’m primetime’s most charming host—”

“Law. I work at a law firm.”

The answer is ripped from you in a bid to avoid Soonyoung’s theatrics, and you find yourself blinking with mild surprise, like you hadn’t prepared to divulge the detail at all. Soonyoung notices, and his lips curl in a smug smirk.

“I know,” he says simply. “Jihoon told me.”

You make a mental note to berate your mutual friend as you exasperatedly say, “Why did you ask, then?”

“Because I wanted to hear it from you.”

Soonyoung lets his words hang, linger, before he goes on. It’s just four words, what he utters next, but it still threatens to tilt your world on its axis.

“I’m proud of you,” he says, like it’s the most natural thing in the world.

You’ve heard your fair share of the platitude throughout the years. From Jihoon and Wonwoo, when you first got into law school. From your parents, when you passed the bar exam. From Teacher Kang, every December, when the Christmas showcase is pulled off.

This is something entirely different. This has you shoving your phone back into your bag, just to hide the way your hand had begun to twitch at the words.

“You can’t say stuff like that to your ex,” you snap.

Soonyoung’s answer comes without a moment’s hesitation. “Why? Being exes doesn’t take away the fact that I’m proud of you.”

Too much, too much, too much. It’s too much for your pride, your emotions, your heart. You wish you could take this for what it is— a compliment, some kindness— but the history goes deep, and the words feel like a scab being picked.

You do what you do best. You turn on your heel and begin to walk away.

Thankfully, Soonyoung doesn’t follow you. But he’s nothing if not vexatious, so he squeezes in a sing-song cry of “Byeee, attorney!” as you leave.

You quicken your pace just a little bit more.

Jihoon has the tendency to look like a kicked puppy when he’s being told off.

He doesn’t pout, no, but the expression on his face is a close thing as you give him grief over telling Soonyoung about you. Wonwoo, stuck in the middle as per usual, only calmly cuts into his lunch.

“Why did you have to tell Soonyoung about my work, huh?” you demand as you slice a little too forcefully into your bulgogi. “Giving him free ammunition or something?”

Jihoon finally gets a word in edgewise. “It’s because he asks about you,” he deadpans.

The thought of it is so insane that you bark out a laugh. The retort— bullshit!— is right on the tip of your tongue, but it dies out when Wonwoo bobs his head up and down.

Wonwoo has always been the less likely of the two to lie to you. You’re still a bit baffled even as the bespectacled man confirms, “Yeah. He asks me, too.”

“Asks what?”

“How you’re doing.” Wonwoo is so nonchalant about the whole affair that you’re tempted to call him out, too, but the lack of teasing in his tone gives you some sense of where his head is at. “What you’re up to. Stuff like that.”

Kwon Soonyoung has kept tabs on you.

In the years that you’ve tried to bury the memory of your friendship, of your relationship, Kwon Soonyoung has kept tabs.

“He—” You clear your throat when your voice comes out a little more high-pitched than usual. If Jihoon and Wonwoo notice, they mercifully don’t call you out.

You manage, “He could have just reached out to me.”

Jihoon, who had taken advantage of the reprieve to shovel some spoonfuls of rice into his mouth, swallows hard before speaking.

“Would you have answered?” he inquires, one eyebrow arched upward.

The truth— rarely plain, never simple— lies in a single, two-lettered word. No. No, you probably wouldn’t have answered. And even though you want to defend yourself, to claim otherwise, both Jihoon and Wonwoo would only do what you had wanted to do earlier. Call bullshit.

You let out a groan of defeat, slumping forward until your forehead has planted on the table in front of you.

“No further questions, Your Honor,” Wonwoo chirps, and though you can’t see him, you can already imagine the smirk that he’s sporting.

“Why did you come home?”

“I thought there would be a high school reunion. I think I got the date wrong.”

The abundance of existing routines for Santa Claus Is Coming to Town makes it somewhat easier for you and Soonyoung to dumb it down for the kids.

You spend the next week keeping the students in line as Soonyoung teaches them how to shimmy, how to slide, how to do jazz hands. Every so often, you catch him at a loss— like when one of the younger boys tries to eat a crayon, or when the kids go into a scream-filled debate about the existence of Santa Claus.

These are things you’re used to. These are things you can handle.

Taking the crayons away or assuring the kids that Santa Claus is real is far, far easier than being in forced proximity with the one that got away. You’re reminded of that, now, as Soonyoung taps out for a breather and you sub in to go over the routine with the kids once more.

They’re more prone to listening to you, and so you easily get one run of the song down without a hitch. In the years that you’ve voluntarily choreographed for the showcase, you’ve never thought too much about the technicalities of your skill. You danced well enough to teach, to pull off a decent, child-appropriate routine. That had been enough.

But with the scrutinizing eyes of dance studio CEO ‘Hoshi’ following your every move, you feel that simmer of competitiveness in your stomach.

After three more runs of the number with the children, you let them go. As you go to catch your breath over one of the auditorium’s bleachers, you’re surprised by a hand holding out a Cool Blue Raspberry Gatorade.

“Is this still your poison?” Soonyoung asks with a hint of amusement as he settles into the space next to you.

You don’t answer. Briefly, your mind goes to those days— the salsa competitions, the random play dance events. How Soonyoung’s backpack always had his Game Boy Color, a change of clothes, and a blue Gatorade. The last one, always for you.

You uncork the drink, tilt your head back, and take a long swig. It’s as close to a confirmation that you’re going to give him.

The two of you sit in silence as the children begin to file out of the auditorium. Once the only two of you are left, Soonyoung speaks up, the words far too quiet in the otherwise empty room.

“You really are good, you know.”

It takes you a beat too long to realize that he’s talking about your dancing. If the two of you were on better terms, you might have teased him about that night on the playground, many years ago, when he had fibbed about you being as good of a dancer as he is.

As it is, you can only respond with an equally soft, “Thanks.”

Being the bigger person lasts for all of fifty seconds, though, because Soonyoung’s next words prickle.

“Could’ve been much bigger.”

“Excuse me?”

He freezes, an oh shit type of expression crossing his face. Even so, he doubles down. “I'm just saying,” he starts, his tone growing slightly more defensive. “You could have done much more—”

Your words are cold as your fingers close tighter around the half-empty bottle of Gatorade. “Am I not doing much where I am right now?”

“You’re twisting my words,” he shoots back.

“Those are exactly your words,” you fume.

It’s an old wound, one that Soonyoung poked with something sharp the second he returned home and made his presence known. You’ve done everything you can to ignore it, to keep the ache and the bitterness at bay, but you can’t help the way that it rises in your throat like bile. Something acidic, and foul, and unwelcome.

You get to your feet, leaving the offered Gatorade on the bleacher. “Sorry not all of us moved to the city and had a big break, Kwon,” you say as you begin to gather your things.

“Jesus Christ.” Soonyoung’s cuss is punctuated with a laugh, but it’s not like any of the laughs you’re used to from him. The sound is annoyed, pained. Almost hurt, even, though you try not to dwell on that.

Your relationship, your breakup, is an old wound that hasn’t completely healed. It’s been on the edge of festering ever since you lost contact with him.

And, now, as you leave him stewing in his emotions, you figure that it’s only going to fester some more.

Back then, the two of you had dubbed each other The Great Pretenders.

Dating in high school required a certain level of delicadeza. While your relationship was largely accepted and acknowledged, there were still a number of things you had to hide from your families and friends. Tear-stained faces after petty arguments. Hickies under the collars of your school uniforms.

It’s been years, but The Great Pretenders makes a reappearance when the pair of you have to face Teacher Kang the next day.

It goes unspoken that whatever the hell is going on between you two shouldn’t affect the showcase, shouldn’t be obvious to anyone that matters. And so the two of you update her on the kids’ progress, and sip the warm drinks that she offers, without any indication of having had a spat.

The check-in winds to a close after a couple of polite exchanges. Teacher Kang seems pleased with preparations so far, though she looks even more happy about you and Soonyoung’s perceived civility, which damn near bowls you over.

“By the way, Soonyoung,” Teacher Kang says conversationally as the three of you pack up for the afternoon. “How’s the studio?”

“All good.” He pauses, like he realized he hadn’t given that sufficient of an answer. “We’re usually busy around this time of year, but I have one of my staff keeping watch while I’m here. I plan to head back once the holiday season is over.”

You should’ve seen it coming, but something beneath your rib cage still twinges at the thought. You ignore the feeling in favor of shouldering your backpack.

“You shouldn’t wait so long before coming back again,” Teacher Kang half-jokes.

Soonyoung’s chuckle— a dry, unconvincing huff of ha-ha— is chased with the cool delivery of “I’ll try to make it a more regular thing.”

In the corner of your eye, you catch what Teacher Kang misses. The most imperceptible tick in Soonyoung’s jaw.

Liar, you think. Liar, liar, liar.

You and Soonyoung had mastered the art of pretending, sure, but you could never quite get away from each other.

“Why did you come home?”

“I’d forgotten the sound of my mother’s voice.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah.”

The snow returns with a vengeance.

It’s that time of winter where the streets are blanketed with white, where the sleet and rain makes conditions horrendous. You have no choice but to soldier through the soft hail as you make your way to the school, which you’re committed to reach come rain or shine.

Except when you get to the front doors, you’re greeted by a bemused-looking Soonyoung.

You pat down your snow-clad clothes as you look him up and down. “Where are you going?”

He answers your question with one of his own. “Haven’t you heard?” He holds up his phone. “Practice is cancelled today. Everybody’s snowed in.”

You were rarely the type to walk and text, so your phone has been sitting pretty in your pocket this whole time. When you go to check it, you find messages from Teacher Kang. Canceling showcase preparations in lieu of the weather. Stay safe and dry.

“I just found out myself,” Soonyoung says delicately.

Ah. That explained why he was the only other person around.

Disgruntled, you glance at your surroundings. There’s barely anyone present, and the snow is only seeming to fall heavier with each passing minute. You’d be lucky to get a cab at this rate—

“Or I could just drive you.”

You jump a bit. At what point had you started saying that last thought out loud?

“That’s not necessary,” you start to say, but Soonyoung is already fishing for his car keys in his jacket pocket.

“I know you hate my ass,” he responds bluntly. “But that hatred isn’t worth freezing to death over, no?”

His face is turned away from you, so there’s no way for you to tell what expression he’s sporting. It’s a small grace. Even though you dread the thought of being stuck in a small space with nothing but your thoughts and an old ghost to keep your company, you do hate the prospect of hypothermia even more.

That’s how you end up in the passenger seat of Soonyoung’s beat-up Hyundai Pony, which stutters and bucks every time he has to take a turn. It’s the very same car that you both learned to drive in, though it’s looking significantly worse for wear.

While nostalgia has proven to be a bitch, you can’t resist the jab on the tip of your tongue. “Jesus,” you breathe, your fingers tightening around your seatbelt as Soonyoung barely makes a corner. “I can’t believe this thing’s still alive.”

“That makes two of us,” he quips with a grimace.

Once the car miraculously makes its way past a snowed-out road, Soonyoung notes, “Remember when my dad first taught us how to get through rain?”

The memory brings the flicker of a smile to your face. “You were so scared you might run a squirrel over,” you say.

“You swore up and down that you’d never drive on a wet road,” Soonyoung shoots back.

“I still don’t,” you respond, glancing out the window for the lack of a better thing to look at. “I ask my dad to drive whenever it’s raining.”

Soonyoung’s next words make you pause. “Your dad hated me,” he huffs.

You let out a snort of laughter. “That’s not true. He really liked you.”

“He always left the room whenever I came in,” Soonyoung argues.

“He wanted to give us privacy.” You can’t help the sigh that slides past your lips, the sound edged with annoyance. “Really, you’ve got to stop blaming other people for why we didn’t work out.”

The words hang heavy in the din of the car. You wonder, for a second, if you’d been too callous, but there’s something like a rueful smile that tugs at Soonyoung’s face.

“Sorry. Coping mechanism,” he responds, and you don’t push any further.

An awkward couple of moments follow. Unfortunately for you, Soonyoung has never learned the art of tact— always pushing it just a little bit, right to the point where the tension is drawn like a rubber band.

“You know, my mom has been asking about you,” Soonyoung says conversationally as he turns into your neighborhood. “Says I should invite you over for lunch.”

Your grasp on the seatbelt is white-knuckled. It wasn’t like you were actively avoiding the Kwons; you were perfectly polite when you saw them in public, when you ran into them in the supermarket or at church. But it’s been years since you last stepped foot in their house, and for obvious reasons, too.

“I’m not ready for that,” you answer tersely.

Soonyoung is either oblivious to your agitation or ignorant of it. Regardless of which, he goes on, “I said the same thing. I guess she still thinks—”

“Let’s not go there.” Your tone is just cutting enough to give Soonyoung pause, to have him stammer to a halt as he pulls to a stop in front of your house. “I’m hot having this conversation with you, Soonyoung.”

He doesn’t apologize, though he does back down. “Right,” he mumbles as he parks. “Right.”

You unbuckle your seatbelt, careful to keep your gaze trained away from Soonyoung. “Thanks for the ride.”

Soonyoung is graciously quiet as you step out of his car, though that lasts for all of ten seconds— just enough for you to almost close the door on him— when he speaks up.

“Hey. For the record,” he starts, leaning over the center console to get in the last word. “I don’t blame anyone else for our breakup. I know whose fault it is.”

You raise an eyebrow. He throws you an infuriating grin before reaching over to pull the door close himself.

Soonyoung peels away, once again leaving you with more questions than answers.

“Why did you come home?”

“It’s cold in the city, during the winter.”

You and Soonyoung find yourselves doubling your efforts as the date of the showcase looms.

You spend more of your time with Teacher Kang. You extend a little more patience to the kids. You dance— dance the routines, dance with Soonyoung, dance around the truth.

But when the elephant in the room is as big as it is, ignorance is not an option. And Soonyoung never did learn how to keep his mouth shut.

It’s late in the evening, the two of you having pulled extra hours to work on decor. You’d felt like it was going a little too well with the way that the two of you were uncharacteristically cordial throughout the afternoon. But of course that was too good to be true, because just as you were packing up for the night, Soonyoung had to go and say—

“Are you happy here?”

You freeze midway into packing away the multi-colored, Christmas tree-shaped banners. That familiar flash of frustration, that inkling that he’s looking down on you, rises up again.

“Why wouldn’t I be?” you say, and he’s immediately prickly.

“It’s nothing.” He shoves some of the props behind the stage, hasty in his pursuit to end the conversation as fast as possible. “Forget I said anything.”

“Come on,” you bristle. All the while, you’re also putting things back in place— your movements just a little more forceful than necessary. “Spit it out. You started it.”

“I was just asking.”

“You’re never ‘just asking’. Go on, say it.”

“You—”

The two of you are glaring at each other, now, your face red and Soonyoung’s fists balled at his side. When you speak, it’s with a tone that could cut through ice.

“Just because I chose to stay,” you say. “It doesn’t mean my dreams are smaller than yours.”

Soonyoung looks dumbstruck. His voice is impossibly tight; his words, reverberating in the otherwise empty hall.

“I wasn’t going to say your dreams are small. It’s just… We—” He backtracks, like the pronoun had been a scalding slip of the tongue. “You could’ve sold out auditoriums.”

Your answer is immediate, if not a little strained.

“A sold out auditorium doesn’t matter if the one person you want isn’t at the recital,” you say. “Some people find happiness right where they are, and this is mine.”

And that’s always been the crux of it, hasn’t it? Soonyoung has tried to make a name for himself in cities, in rooms full of people cheering his name. His definition of success was only achievable in quantity, in scale. Yours was different, and he could never really quite accept that.

There’s a moment where Soonyoung doesn’t say anything, just looks at you with a pinched expression on his face. He opens his mouth like he might say something—

“Oi! You two!”

You and Soonyoung jump, the tension that had been simmering between you two disappearing at the interruption. The school’s ancient janitor lingers by the door, squinting at you two.

“Whaddya think yer still doin’ here?” the old man croaks, wielding his broom in a fashion that still makes you recoil. “It’s past curfew! Geddout!”

Never mind the fact you and Soonyoung were now in your late twenties and long out of high school. The two of you still cower and meekly mumble, “Sorry, Mr. Cho.”

It’s snowing again when the two of you step out. Soonyoung’s face is set in stone as he mumbles, “Get in my car.”

Right. Like that was going to happen.

With a wordless huff, you begin to march in the opposite direction to him. “Hey,” he calls out. “Where are you going?”

“Home!”

“In this— hey, it’s snowing!”

“That’s what happens during the winter!”

You’d be a little more conscious about having a screaming match in the streets if it wasn’t nearly midnight. Something about the incessant snowfall and the cloak of darkness gives you just a little more courage to speak your mind, to toe that line that the two of you have so haphazardly drawn.

Soonyoung marches after you, his own misgivings about the weather momentarily forgotten. He’s raring to fight, and it shows in the way he stomps through the snow like an overgrown child.

“So that’s it, then?” he hollers from a couple of paces behind you. “You’re just going to stay here for the rest of your life, playing it safe? Work at the family restaurant because of filial piety? Marry— I don’t fucking know— guy-next-door Joshua Hong, and have babies, and—”

“What is your problem?!” you snap, rounding on Soonyoung. He skids to a halt, stopping himself from completely barreling into you. “Why are you acting like you know me?”

“Because I do!” His voice cracks on the last word. “I know you!”

“No, you don’t.”

“I know you very well.”

“From what? Jihoon and Wonwoo’s stories?” There’s a muscle straining in your neck from the way you’ve raised your voice, but you can’t find it in yourself to back down. “Think that’s enough to fill a six-year gap?”

That seems to get Soonyoung. “You never reached out to me! Not once!” he seethes.

“Well, neither did you!”

“I didn’t think—” His breath catches. He pushes on. “I didn’t think you’d want to hear from me.”

“That’s a bullshit excuse and you know it.”

“What’s your excuse, then?” he shoots back. “Come on. I’m dying to hear it.”

What’s your excuse, he’s asking. Why haven’t you reached out? If you were so angry and upset about the radio silence, why did you do nothing about it?

Several answers occur to you at once. There was Soonyoung’s own flimsy reasoning. I didn’t think you’d want to hear from me.

There was something close to the truth, something a little too vulnerable to be spoken out loud. I was mad at you. I hated you for a bit. I think I still hate you even now.

There was the whisper of something treacherous, something damning. I was scared that I would only end up asking for you to come back.

None of those words come out. You stay standing across from Soonyoung in the wake of his challenge, your face flushed, your gaze narrow. He glares right back at you, unyielding in his pride and his pain.

The silence stretches. It becomes an answer in itself.

“Exactly,” Soonyoung says with a heavy exhale. There’s a spark of flint in his eyes, a flicker of something that could almost be likened to hurt. “It takes two people to break up. You always seem to forget that.”

As he begins to stalk away, you’re overcome with that feeling again. That heavy weight in your chest, put there whenever you know he got the last word, whenever he turned out to be right. Soonyoung has only taken about three steps away before you’re bending down and cupping some snow in your hands.

The hastily-made snowball hits Soonyoung on the back of his head. It splatters against his hair, leaving tiny, glistening flakes tangled in his blonde strands.

He freezes, but only for a moment. In the blink of an eye, Soonyoung is already crouching down to retaliate. He’s quicker and much more savage, and his revenge soars through the end to land squarely in your chest.

You stagger backward, the gasp catching in your throat. Oh, it’s on.

What ensues is the most ruthless snowball fight that your small town has seen. Snowballs are hurled with reckless abandon, the ice crystals getting everywhere from your clothes to your socks. Neither of you even bother to try and hide from the onslaught. The two of you take each other’s attacks, every hit punctuated with heatless insults that have simmered too long.

“You never called—” Soonyoung screeches, sending a cold sphere against your shoulder.

“You didn’t visit—” you shriek as you shape ammunition in your gloved hands.

“You deleted every photo of me off your Facebook—” A snowball to your side.

“You talked to Jihoon and Wonwoo, but not me—” Another square hit to Soonyoung’s chest, sending a puff of powdery snow up into his face.

“Coward!”

“Asshole!”

It feels like hours before the two of you let up.

The two of you are covered in snow from head to toe; your chests heaving from exertion, your cheeks ruddy from the cold. The heat of the exchange leaves you both puffing breaths that cloud the air between you.

There’s a hint of something in your stances. Something that feels like it belongs to another time— before the breakup, before the distance.

Quietly, Soonyoung starts to laugh.

His hands are on his hips and his head is tilted back. The flakes catch on his eyelashes, his hair, but he keeps his face upturned to the sky as he laughs, and laughs, and laughs.

That old, familiar sound. The one that warms you up from the inside, whether or not you care to admit it. You’re doubled over, your hands on your knees, as you watch him look more and more like the boy you loved and lost.

“I hate you,” you choke out, though a corner of your mouth has twitched upward.

He doesn’t even look at you as he responds.

“Yeah,” he breathes. “Missed you, too.”

“Why did you come home?”

“Am I not allowed to?”

“Soonyoung says you two kissed and made up.”

You shoot Jihoon an unamused glare.

From across you, he raises his hand in a defensive gesture. “I didn’t believe him, of course,” he insists, though you don’t miss the way he and Wonwoo try to discreetly exchange money under the table.

Wonwoo catches your suspicious expression and gives you an apologetic grin in return.

“Made a bet,” he says.

“You two suck,” you groan.

Your three’s weekly lunch has gone mostly swimmingly up to the point that Jihoon had brought up Soonyoung. Now, though, with the topic broached, neither of your friends see the need to be discreet about it.

“I do wonder why Soonie decided to come home now, after all these years,” Wonwoo muses aloud, toying with his chopsticks as he speaks. “Seems a bit out of the blue, doesn’t it?”

“He came home because Teacher Kang asked him,” you point out.

One of Jihoon’s eyebrows cocks upward. “Teacher Kang has asked him every year for the past couple of years,” he says. “So it’s not just that, I’m sure.”

Wonwoo chimes in with, “Must be something real important, then.”

Jihoon nearly smirks. “Or someone.”

What feels like your nth groan of the evening escapes you. “Put a sock in it, you two,” you grumble, drawing snickers from your friends.

Jihoon mouths something to Wonwoo. You can’t make it out for certain, but it looks suspiciously like a wordless grumble of Bet’s still on.

Civility is a rare thing to share with Soonyoung.

With the showcase mere days away, it’s a welcome development. At least it’s easier for the two of you to iron out the chinks in the routines, to ensure the program is up to par with the school’s standards.

But with civility comes an even more fragile thing— hope.

It’s in the way Soonyoung will hold open doors for you or haul the heavier props on your behalf, much to your chagrin and to Teacher Kang’s amusement.

It’s in the way Soonyoung starts to make small talk about everything from your day job to your parents, never minding much that he’s the one who has to carry half the conversations.

It’s in the way Soonyoung tries to make you laugh, and how, one afternoon, he finally succeeds.

You can’t even remember what it was. Some terrible joke about the kids, maybe. All you know is that a snort of laughter had slid out of you, the sound not quite the derisive giggles you’d been giving him the past couple of weeks.

You’re still chuckling when you see Soonyoung’s face.

Immediately, you sober up. “What?” you ask, because he’s staring at you with his jaw slack and his eyes slightly wide.

He tries to rearrange his expression into something more acceptable; it’s too late, given that you’ve already caught him. Soonyoung may have not always been honest, but he was expressive.

You glare at him, indicating that he’s not about to escape, and he huffs out a defeated sigh.

“It’s just— I forgot, okay?”

“Forgot what?”

“How good happiness looks on you.”

Who the hell says something like that on a random Thursday?

Soonyoung still has that vaguely dazed look in his eyes, even though you’ve begun to stare at him like he’s insane. As he walks away to go and refill his water bottle, he nearly collides with one of the auditorium’s poles, drawing raucous laughter from the kids.

You shush them, the tips of your ears beginning to flame.

“Why did you come home?”

“It was about time.”

It’s nothing short of a miracle, how you, Jihoon, Soonyoung, and Wonwoo all end up at the same table at Taco Joe’s.

Jihoon had been the one who proposed the idea. So casually, too, like he was readying himself for one of your infamous tirades or a flurry of your punches. Soonyoung wants to grab drinks with all of us.

To Jihoon and Wonwoo’s surprise, you had only responded with, “When?”

Neither boys want to look a gift horse in the mouth, so they’re extra careful in playing their cards right. Wonwoo vows to be the designated driver. Jihoon holds back on making any jokes about the whole affair. And, Soonyoung— well, he’s just happy to be there.

“This place really hasn’t changed, huh?” Soonyoung snickers as he sips at his beer.

There’s not a lot of bars to choose from in your small town, making Taco Joe’s something of an institution. Its low lights, Top 50’s playlist, and cheap drinks attract more of the mid-twenties crowd, though there had been a time in your teenage years when you’d all tried and failed to sneak in.

“Joe threatened to ban us for life when we first stepped foot in here,” Jihoon reminisces.

Wonwoo pushes his glasses up his face by the bridge of his nose. “Worse,” he says. “He said he would tell our parents.”

Simultaneously, the four of you shudder. A small smile tugs at your lips as you extend your cocktail for the boys to cheers with.

“To vindication,” you announce.

There’s a ripple of laughter among your friends.

“Vindication,” they echo, clinking their bottles and glasses with yours.

A part of you is suspicious at how pleasant the night is going. The conversation is easy, if not a little on the safe side. The drinks are good. The music is more often a hit instead of a miss. It’s shaping up to be a decent evening, though there are a handful of interruptions here and there.

Kwon Soonyoung is a bit of a local celebrity, after all.

Everybody and their mother knows about his swanky dance studio in the city, about the idols and celebrities he’s met in his line of work. Every so often, someone will stop by to greet him, to exchange a word or two with him.

Soonyoung is perfectly amicable to all of them. His smile, practiced; his words, cool and smooth. After the fourth or so person has come up to say hello to the Hoshi, Jihoon voices out what you’ve all been thinking.

“It’s so exhausting hanging out with you,” Jihoon says dryly.

Soonyoung giggles mid-swig of his alcohol. “Can’t help it.” He fakes a tired sigh, his shoulders rising in a shrug. “Everybody wants a piece of me.”

“I’ll tear you to pieces if anyone else comes up to us,” Wonwoo warns.

Your gaze flicks over Wonwoo’s shoulder, towards someone approaching your corner table. “Get those claws ready, Wonu,” you say.

When Joshua Hong saunters up to your group’s table, though, his greeting for Soonyoung is cursory at best.

“Nice to see you back, Kwon,” the man says politely before turning his attention to you. “Hey, you.”

You straighten in your seat. Jihoon and Wonwoo exchange a look. Soonyoung’s eyes narrow ever so slightly as he gives a grumbled ‘hello’ to Joshua’s lackluster greeting.

It’s apparent that Joshua isn’t there for him, because Joshua is instead smiling at you. “Hey,” you respond in kind. “What’s up?”

Joshua had been an upperclassman during your school days, part of the infamous trio featuring troublemaker Yoon Jeonghan and varsity captain Choi Seungcheol. But Joshua was more on the mild side, known for his volunteer work at the local choir. He wasn’t any less unattainable, though, and you’re reminded of why Soonyoung so callously threw his name out during your more recent spat.

Prior to dating Soonyoung, you did have a raging crush on Joshua, after all. You’re briefly reminded of it as he flashes you a warm smile. “I was hoping I could buy you a drink,” he says. “For… you know.”

There’s absolutely nothing coy in Joshua’s words. He’s not suggestive, not trying to come on to you. All the same, the three boys at your table react like Joshua had just proposed.

Jihoon bites back a grin. Wonwoo cocks his head to one side. Soonyoung shoots back a quarter of his beer.

For… you know, Joshua is saying, and you know exactly what he means even though the rest aren’t privy to it. You’re already getting to your feet before you can register it. “Yeah,” you say, nodding towards the bar. “Let’s go.”

None of your friends say a thing as you step away with Joshua, but you can feel their eyes on your back. You know you’re going to get hell for it later— but, for now, you focus on the small talk that Joshua has to offer.

He lets you pick out your cocktail of choice. As the bartender goes to make it, Joshua smiles down at you. There had been a time where you might’ve keened over at the sight of it; now, though, it only makes your heart flutter a bit.

His voice is just loud enough to be heard over the thumping music, but low enough that it’s just for the two of you.

“Thank you for your help,” he says. “Really. You’re a life-saver.”

Your expression softens underneath the lights of the bar. “How’s your dad?”

Joshua’s smile is a little tight, but not any less sincere. “Better,” he responds. “It’s rough, of course, but he’s coping.”

Earlier in the year, Joshua’s father had been one of your firm’s clients. It had been a lot more challenging than you thought, working with someone you personally knew. The arduous process had involved unsecured debts, scarred credit scores, and seized collaterals, but you were ultimately able to help the Hongs in closing down their music school.

“I’m glad.” You pause, as if realizing that’s not quite the right thing to say. “I’m not glad about what happened—”

Joshua’s laughter cuts through your tirade. Your shoulders ease when you realize it’s not a particularly mean laugh. More of an amused sound at your panic.

“Don’t worry, I get it,” he reassures as the bartender slides your drinks to you. Joshua gives the other man a nod and a mumbled promise of tipping later.

“I don’t want to keep you,” Joshua says. “Just wanted to show my appreciation.”

“You didn’t have to.” Your fingers wrap around the drink he brought you. “But thank you, anyway.”

Joshua nods, grins. The lines are clear as day. He’s not flirting, not trying to get in your pants or anything. The drink is exactly that: A show of gratitude. Nothing more, nothing less.

Some old version of you might have been disappointed. Tonight, you are only oddly relieved. The two of you talk a little more— about things that are neither here nor there— before Joshua lets you go.

Upon your return to your table, you’re greeted with a sight for sore eyes.

Somehow, in the fifteen or so minutes that you were gone, Soonyoung had already shot back his first bottle of beer. As you slide back into your seat next to Wonwoo, your bespectacled friend quietly divulges, “That’s his third one.”

“Third?” You glance toward Soonyoung, your eyebrows raised quizzically. “Are you trying to get alcohol poisoning or something?”

Soonyoung only flashes you a grin before taking another swig. He ignores your question in favor of chatting Jihoon’s ear off; the latter throws you a bemused look before going back to his conversation with Soonyoung.

You huff out a sigh as you go to nurse the cocktail that Joshua got you.

“I wonder what’s gotten into him,” Wonwoo says, his tone just a little too smug for his own good.

You shoot him a sideways glare. He sinks his teeth into his lower lip, hiding his blooming smile behind a sip of his soda.

As the night wears on, you begin to feel that familiar buzz in your system. The telltale signs of your tipsiness leave you pleasantly sated— your laughter a little less restrained, your brain a lot more empty. So when Soonyoung leans across the table to yell at you, “Let’s dance!”, your first instinct is not to say Fuck off.

The words that come out instead are “To what song?”

Soonyoung is already standing up and moving around the table to get to your side. An intoxicated Jihoon and sober Wonwoo only watch on, spectators to this impending dumpster fire, as Soonyoung reaches out to tug you out of your seat.

“Any song,” he breathes. His face is flushed a deep shade of red, but his eyes are as bright as ever. “Anything you want.”

There’s a right thing to do in this situation.

The right thing to do would be to let Soonyoung down politely. To tell him no, you’re not interested in dancing. You’re happy to drink with him and your friends, but you’re not about to indulge him with the thing that once made the two of you so close. You don’t think your heart can take it.

But you’re two cocktails in. The music is good. And Soonyoung is looking at you with that absolutely incandescent expression, faring not any better than you in the game of sobriety. How could you deny him?

You let him pull you to your feet. His hand stays wrapped around your wrist as he drags you out onto the dance floor, as he leans over to the DJ and yells, “Do you have any GD?!”

The current track transitions into the unmistakable beats of Good Boy. Soonyoung’s face lights up like a firework.

You’re drunk enough to laugh at him, with him, as you easily fall into the decade-old dance routine. No matter how long it’s been, it seems like your body still remembers every step, every hand movement.

You’re drunk enough to not care that Wonwoo is not-so discreetly filming the two of you, that Jihoon is wearing a knowing smirk. Come tomorrow, your friends will have a lot to say about this moment. But, right now, it’s all inconsequential.

You’re drunk enough to dance. To dance in a way that isn’t simply for Christmas showcase purposes. To dance and remember why you loved it so much in the first place.

To dance with the boy who got you into it in the first place.

Good Boy spins into Home Sweet Home, then Fantastic Baby, then Gee. You and Soonyoung dance through it all. Honestly, you’re no longer built for this the same way that you once were, and you’re certainly not up to par with Soonyoung.

His drunkenness does nothing to dampen his energy or his dancing skills. He moves across the floor with the practiced ease of a professional, putting everyone to shame without even trying. His toothy smile never leaves his face as the two of you swing and pop and glide.

By the time the DJ starts to play more modern pop, you call for a time-out. Soonyoung stumbles after you and the two of you collapse onto a nearby couch, boneless from the non-stop dancing.

Wonwoo is off to one side, chatting with a girl, while Jihoon is nowhere to be found. You wouldn’t hold it past the latter to be on a smoke break of some sorts; nights out always tended to drain him, after all.

“Insane,” Soonyoung croaks out. Blonde strands of his hair stick to his face due to sweat. You resist the urge to fix it.

“I haven’t danced like that in ages,” you say, rolling your shoulders to fight off the growing ache in your body.

Soonyoung tries to laugh. The sound comes out more like a wheeze. His next words are mumbled in between attempts to catch his breath. “You’re good, babe.”

Come Back Home is thumping through the speakers. You try to focus on that instead of Soonyoung’s Freudian slip; you fail miserably, and it must show on your face because Soonyoung sucks in some air through his teeth.

“Sorry.” He’s laughing, but the sound is a bit rough around the edges. “Moment of weakness.”

A beat. “Wanna dance some more?” he prompts.

Whether it’s a desperate bid to run from his words or a sincere offer by a man who simply lives to dance, you don’t question it. “Yeah,” you say a little too quickly. “Let’s dance.”

You dance until you feel like your feet are going to fall off. Soonyoung matches your pace, never missing a beat. When he needs to take a break, he drinks some more— an endless cycle of dance floor shenanigans and drawn-out sips of beer.

It’s probably why he’s swaying by the time that you’re all calling it a night. Wonwoo and Jihoon flank Soonyoung on either side, the blonde still somehow having the tenacity to chatter while dragging his feet. He’s talking out of his ass about one thing or another, like music these days “not being as good as the OGs,” and you can sense Wonwoo’s exasperation over the whole thing.

“Living in Seoul has done absolutely nothing for your tolerance,” Wonwoo grumbles, prompting Soonyoung to go into a long-winded rant about the cultural differences in drinking culture.

The relief on Wonwoo’s face is palpable as he shoves Soonyoung into the backseat of his car.

Jihoon gives a nod of his own. “You’ll be good to drive?” he asks Wonwoo.

“Didn’t drink a drop,” Wonwoo chirps. “You?”

“Sobered up, like, two hours ago,” Jihoon says wryly. He gives you a vicious side eye— wordlessly blaming you for not being able to go home any earlier, since he was your designated driver— and you raise your shoulders in a half-shrug.

“You were the one who invited me out to drink.” Your voice is hoarse from all the alcohol, from the physical exertion of non-stop dancing.

You’re somehow lucid enough to register that Soonyoung is calling for you. There’s a slight pout on his face, like he’s upset to be missing out on the conversation. He’s bracing himself against the frame of the car door, his legs swung over the seat, as you gingerly approach.

“What?” you ask.

This close, you can smell his faint cologne, mingling with the scent of alcohol and sweat.

This close, you can see the way his eyes are slightly unfocused; his mouth, still bearing the hint of a glowing smile.

“You—” he croaks out.

His gaze darts to your lips. It’s a blink-and-you’ll-miss-it moment. You don’t miss it.

Your breath stills in your chest, and Soonyoung is looking up at your face like he’s searching for something. Denial? Reciprocity?

He must not have found what he was looking for, because the words he grumbles are, “I’m going to hurl.”

Wonwoo’s panicked shriek cuts through the otherwise quiet parking lot.

“Not in my fucking car, asswipe!”

Soonyoung’s hangover the next day is comical.

You can’t help but snicker as he rolls up to the showcase’s dry run with shades over his eyes and a large cup of coffee in his shaking hands.

“You suck,” he hisses to you as he slides on to the bench next to you. Teacher Kang is busy heralding the students, getting them into their costumes and places, so the two of you have a minute alone before the hubbub strikes up.

“You’re the one who can’t hold down his alcohol,” you respond, eyeing his slumped form with amusement.

Soonyoung mumbles some incoherent cusses, his free hand reaching up to rub at his temples.

“God, my last memory was Hong coming up to the table,” he grouses.

You’re reminded of the inordinate amount of alcohol he downed in your brief absence. I wonder what’s gotten into him, Wonwoo had said.

“That clears,” you say sympathetically.

There’s a moment’s pause before Soonyoung tentatively asks, “Did the two of you ever…?”

You don’t immediately register what he’s asking about Joshua. When it hits you, though, you find a startled laugh sliding past your lips. Because there’s Wonwoo’s answer, even though you don’t recognize it then and there.

“Hong? No, no.” For reasons you can’t quite explain, you feel compelled to tack on, “I haven’t really had the time to date.”

“Oh.” It kills you, how Soonyoung almost sounds relieved. “Me, too. I mean— me neither.”

“Ah.”

“Running a dance studio is a lot of work.”

“Right.”

“And I’m sure— law school, right? That was a lot of work, too.”

“Right, yeah.”

It’s a stilted conversation, one heavy in its implications. The real things that the two of you want to say, want to address, linger on the surface, but neither of you seem to want to break that ice.

You settle, instead, for this moment. For the negligible distance between the two of you on the bleachers and how it closes, slow but steady, like the ticking hands of a clock.

Your shoulder just barely presses against Soonyoung’s.

Neither of you move away.

“Why did you come home?”

“Because I love you, and I miss you.”

“You’re lying.”

“Only one of those is a lie, actually.”

You’ve always liked being front of house during the showcase.

You’re a familiar face to the parents of the children, to the community members who attended the event every year. Their warmth is a welcome reprieve from your nerves.

You make small talk. You usher people to their seats. You try not to wonder where the hell Kwon Soonyoung is.

Despite having his calling card, you haven’t deigned to reach out. It’s tucked away in a drawer at home; you don’t quite know what to do with it. Maybe you’ll actually save his number one of these days.

You’re entertaining the thought when you feel a hand at your elbow. The smiling face of Iseul’s mother— the pompous but well-meaning Mrs. Hwang— greets you.

“There’s no need for that,” she says with a chuckle as you fold into a bow. You don’t miss the way she nonetheless preens at your formalities. It’s why you keep up with it.

You let her link your arms and, out of instinct, you begin to lead her to one of the free seats in the auditorium. “Are you excited for this year’s show, Mrs. Hwang?” you ask conversationally.

“You know it,” she answers. “Iseul has been talking non-stop about her performance, but she refuses to tell me what song to expect!”

You’d recognize Mrs. Hwang’s baiting tendencies from a mile away. With a curt giggle, you tell her, “You’ll find out soon enough, Mrs. Hwang. I promise it’ll be worth the suspense.”

The older woman gives you a disapproving frown, but it smooths out as she seems to realize a change in topic. The auditorium is notably a little more packed this year, enough to have the volunteers bringing out additional Monobloc chairs.

“I guess people want to see what the Kwon boy has done to the showcase, hm?” she notes, speaking into existence the fact that you’ve neglected to acknowledge so far.

Surprisingly, you don’t feel bitter about it. People were showing up to assess Soonyoung’s choreography, to bask in the product of his labor. There’s a twinge of something in your chest. It could almost be mistaken for pride.

Mrs. Hwang tacks on, “Mighty shame.”

That throws you off. “Pardon?”

She doesn’t respond immediately, her eyes zeroing in on an empty chair by the front of the stage. She practically drags you there as she continues, “It’s really so unfortunate. The whole thing about his dance studio tanking.”

The whole thing about his dance studio tanking.

What the hell was she talking about?

The universe, once again, had to be messing with you. You’re convinced this is some skit. Some buildup to a joke.

But the punch line never comes, and you end up admitting, “I don’t think I’ve heard about that yet, Mrs. Hwang.”

Your voice is surprisingly even for someone whose world was closing in. If Mrs. Hwang can sense the trepidation in your demeanor, she makes no indication of it. You’re grateful for her obliviousness, even, because she only keeps talking as she settles into her seat.

“My girls are always talking about it,” she says, referring to the group of forty-something-year-old women who like to gather and gossip in the town’s sole Italian restaurant. “That’s why he’s back. Couldn’t hack it out there.”

When she glances up at you with a scrutinizing expression, you just know you’re not going to like what she says next. You’re proven right when she says, “We thought he’d ask for your help, actually. Isn’t liquidation your specialty?”

You can’t be bothered to correct the woman over the technicalities. You give her a tight smile, a nod of your head, a polite ‘goodbye’ as you take your leave.

There are much more pressing matters, you think to yourself, as you go to greet more guests, make sure the music is all queued up, check in on the host’s script.

You didn’t spend over a month preparing for tonight only to lose yourself before it’s even begun. You refuse to let the new piece of information trip you up, even though it has your heart acting like a caged animal underneath your ribs.

The showcase goes by without a hitch. The children are more than phenomenal; they’re perfect.

The audience is enamored. The teachers are overjoyed.

You want nothing more than to go home and tear up Soonyoung’s calling card.

As the showcase wraps up to enthusiastic applause, Teacher Kang snatches the microphone from the host for one last announcement.

“This wouldn’t have been possible without two of our very tireless volunteers,” she says, and— from backstage— you wince. Before you know it, you’re being pushed out onto the stage.

Soonyoung exits from the other stage wing.

He’s managed to evade you the entire showcase, and now you realize why. In his arms, he holds a monstrous bouquet. Yellow acacias, striped carnations, bunch-flowered daffodils. Your first thought is how expensive it might have been, to find out-of-season blooms in the thick of winter.

Your second thought is that you want to hurl, but that’s neither here nor there.

As Soonyoung strides in from the other side of the stage to meet you in the middle, he sees it. He sees the hint of trepidation underneath your practiced grin, sees the way your eyes flash momentarily. His own grin drops ever so slightly.

But the two of you are in an auditorium, on a stage in front of Namyangju’s best and brightest. Neither of you can afford to give voice to what you feel.

Soonyoung hands you the bouquet. You nod in acknowledgement.

The two of you instinctively reach for each other’s hands.

You hadn’t noticed that the crowd had gotten to their feet. A standing ovation. It feels like an echo of the past, a cruel reminder of an alternate universe.

Even so, your smile never wavers. Neither does Soonyoung’s. He raises your hand. The two of you take a bow.

The Great Pretenders put on their best show yet.

“What was that?”

A part of you is surprised that Soonyoung found you. The moment the showcase officially concluded, you were booking it out of the auditorium before he could even get a word in edgewise. Gracefully, the dozens of people hounding him for photos and small talk let you widen the gap.

Still, he caught up. Just as you were passing by the godforsaken playground that had witnessed the ending of it all. Oh, the universe and its jokes.

Soonyoung is red-faced, like you’d embarrassed him somehow despite the convincing act you both put on. Your fingers tighten around the bouquet he gave you.

“What was that?” he repeats, and what little restraint you had left snaps.

“Why did you come home?” you ask point blank.

“Teacher Kang—”

“Don’t,” you snipe. “Teacher Kang asked you last year. And the year before that. Why did you come home now, Soonyoung?”

The question hangs heavy in the early December evening. You and Soonyoung are staring at each other, mere paces away from the swing set where the two of you made your choices.

He doesn’t answer right away, so you prompt him with, “Is it because of me?”

Soonyoung misinterprets the question. You can see the way his eyes light up, the way his lips part like he’s just about to say something of consequence.

You almost feel guilty about the next words that tear out of you. “You’re going bankrupt,” you say, and the hope on his face fizzles out like a popped lightbulb.

“Who told you—” he chokes out.

“So it’s true?”

Kwon Soonyoung is struck dumb.

Soonyoung, whose mouth ran faster than his brain. Soonyoung, who was full of quick quips and witty remarks.

Soonyoung, who is now staring at you like you’ve told him the world was about to end.

You contemplate throwing his bouquet in his face. It will make for a dramatic, pretty picture— the petals falling onto the soft snow, the fuck you loud despite being unspoken. For now, you only clutch the arrangement closer to your chest like it's a lifeline.

“And here I thought—” Your breath hitches on a scoff, the puff of air visible in the chill. “I was a fool who thought you came back for me.”

The truth cuts. Your laugh bitterly as you go on, “I guess you still did, though, huh? Because you need me. What? Were you hoping to avail of cheap services, Kwon?”

“That’s not—”

“That’s exactly it!” Your tone is shrill. Soonyoung always did bring out the worst in you. “You were away for six years, and now you’ve come crawling back—”

“Do you think I wanted to fail?”

Soonyoung’s voice rises, his frustration bubbling over to match yours.

“I starved out there,” he bites out. “Ate cup noodles for a year so the studio could afford rent for one more month. Sold half of my stuff so I could pay my employees. It was so hard.”

The way Soonyoung’s voice breaks on the last word makes something in your heart clench. For a moment, you think it might be pity, but you kill the feeling as soon as it tries to make itself known.

You don’t want to pity Soonyoung, which is both an insult and a grace.

“Why didn’t you say anything?” you ask instead, even though a part of you already knows the answer.

A sound that’s almost like a delirious laugh escapes him. “Not when I was the one who made it out,” he responds.

You never realized how much you’d prefer Soonyoung’s cocky, self-assured self over this version of him. This boy— man— who is defeated and resigned. Even in your anger, there is a small part of you that wants to do something to wipe that look off his face.

“I made it out,” he repeats wearily, like it’s taking everything in him to face the truth of being Namyangju’s failing poster boy.

He continues, “I gave up everything to be there. I gave up you.”

Your grip on the bouquet tightens. There’s a faint prickle behind your eyes, but you refuse to let those tears fall. “You did that like it was easy,” you mumble, your voice just loud enough to carry.

Soonyoung meets your gaze. He looks like he’s on the verge of sobbing himself, but his tone brokers no arguments.

“It wasn’t,” he says.

And that was that.

You’ve never been able to stand not having the last word. You clear your throat, attempting to speak through the lump forming there. “Yeah, well,” you say shakily. “You’re not the only one who lost something.”

It’s a shitty comparison and you know it. Soonyoung’s sacrifices dwarf yours. You weren’t the one who moved away, who bore the weight of an entire city’s pride.

Thankfully, Soonyoung doesn’t call you out on it. He only takes a sharp exhale and turns his gaze away, his eyes fixed on the swings.

When he speaks, his voice is quiet. Almost like the words are an afterthought. “For the record— that night?” he says. You don’t have to ask for clarification. You know exactly which night he’s talking about.

“I was hoping you’d change my mind,” he confesses.

A physical blow to the chest would have hurt less. You stagger, but you try to mask it like you’re taking a step back. Like you’re walking away, even as your eyes never leave Soonyoung’s face.

“And I was hoping I’d be worth staying for,” you say with a humorless laugh, the distance between the two of you growing, growing, growing.

Your parting words are the proverbial nail on the coffin: “I guess we both didn’t get what we wanted.”

“Why did you come home?”

“I didn’t know where else to go.”

For once, Jihoon and Wonwoo have nothing to say.

No wisecrack. No jab. No exchange of money in some backhanded bet.

They listen as you recount the salient points of the argument. You keep the personal stuff out of your own retelling, focusing only on the broad strokes. The biggest concern lies in one nagging question.

“Did you know?” you ask, your hands bracing the table in front of you.

“No,” Jihoon says immediately.

Wonwoo chimes in with a quiet “Me neither.”

You know these boys. You’ve seen them lie to their parents about their homework, lie to their girlfriends about where they were.

They’re not lying now. You know that much.

A shaky exhale escapes you. It’s been three days since the fight and you’ve yet to run into Soonyoung. You wouldn’t hold it past him to avoid you, either by steering clear from the places you frequent or getting on the first bus back to Seoul.

“When he asked about how you were doing,” Jihoon says gruffly. “I thought it was just— yearning or some shit.”

“Me, too,” Wonwoo adds.

Yearning or shit. The words almost make you laugh.

The pinched expression on your face prompts Wonwoo to ask, “Are you upset?”

‘Upset’ feels like too light of a term to describe the maelstrom of emotions within you. There are facts: You wish you had known. You could have afforded to be kinder. You are afraid that you will never stop being angry.

You answer Wonwoo’s question with a mumbled, “Would it be cliché to say that I’m just disappointed?”

“Ah.” His face is thoughtful, understanding. “Because you expected something from him.”

“That’s not it,” you say dryly.

It is.

The three of you lapse into contemplative silence. Jihoon breaks it after a couple of moments, his tone soft and serious.

“I know it’s shitty,” he says. “But I do hope that he’s okay.”

That would be the mature thing to do. Even Wonwoo is nodding his agreement, willing to set aside his own gripes in favor of well wishing.

You can’t bring yourself to do the same. The platitude sticks in your throat until you feel like it will suffocate you.

Soonyoung has an alibi for not showing up to Teacher Kang’s post-processing session.

You’re grateful that the elderly woman doesn’t go on about the details of his absence. She mentions something about him being busy with the holidays, and you take it in stride.

You try not to picture the way his jaw might’ve twitched before sending out the text, before lying to get away.

“Everybody loved the show,” Teacher Kang gushes. “I’m so proud of you, dear. I really do hope we can have Soonyoung on board more often.”

An offhand joke of “we’ll probably be seeing a lot more of him in the near future” crosses your mind, but you hold it back. You may be calloused, but you’re not heartless.

You nod. You agree with Teacher Kang. You hold it together, up until you’re halfway out the door and she calls you back for one last word.

“You know,” she starts. “I remember the two of you when you were kids.”

You’d been dreading this— the inevitable trip down memory lane. You thought you had escaped it, but now you’re facing it with one of the world’s fakest smiles.

“That was a long time ago,” you say.

“It was.” There’s a glimmer in Teacher Kang’s eye. Something unbearably tender. “Soonyoung always made you smile a certain way. You’ve started smiling like that again. It’s nice to see.”

You don’t know how you manage to laugh it off, to bid Teacher Kang goodbye and make your way back to your car. Your hands are shaking as you slide into the driver’s seat of your car.

The school’s parking lot is gracefully empty. It’s a good thing, because then no one can hear you as you fold in half and screech.

You scream until your voice goes hoarse, until the windows shake.

You scream until you can’t hear the way your chest is caving in on your heart.

Your theory of running into everyone but Soonyoung is proven when you’re sooner to cross paths with Mama Kwon.

Your carts nearly collide in the pasta aisle of the grocery store. You’re already bowing, apologizing profusely, when you realize that you recognize the woman holding a can of pesto.

She says your name with the fondness that could rival your own mother’s. It takes everything in you not to bolt at the sound of it.

“What a coincidence,” she says with a tinkling laugh.

You know in your heart of hearts that it’s exactly that. A coincidence. Still, you can’t help but think some higher power is out to get you. Call it karmic justice.

“How have you been, Mrs. Kwon?” you ask, feeling the slight nip of not addressing the woman as you typically might.

She notices too, if her slightly furrowed brow is any indication. She manages to rearrange her expression into something more neutral as she answers.

“You know how the holidays are,” she says, wielding her pesto bottle in an absentminded gesture. “It’s a full house!”

That stings.

You’ve heard from your mother how the past couple of years, Mama Kwon would complain about her household feeling empty during the holidays. The seat at the dining table stayed vacant for the son that refused to come home.

You don’t know how much she knows about the state of the dance studio, so you decide to play it safe. “I’m sure it is,” you say.

The small talk is tearing you up from the inside, but you don’t want to be rude. Don’t want to be a stranger to the woman who once cared for you so deeply— who probably still cares for you, if you really thought of it.

The question is out of you before you can hold it back. “Are you with Soonyoung?”

What would you even do with that information? Would you have booked it if she said ‘yes, he’s right around the corner’? Would you have cried if she revealed that he headed back to the city?

You’re not sure.

Here’s what happens instead: A sigh nearly breaks out of you when Mama Kwon responds, “He’s in the next shop over, getting some repairs for the car. We’re meeting at Italianni's for lunch.”

Still here, a small voice murmurs in the back of your mind. Hasn’t left for Seoul just yet.

You shake the thought away as Mama Kwon delicately prompts, “Would you like to join us?”

Mama Kwon is probably not inviting you solely out of politeness. She’s making the offer because she wants you to be there. She wants you to be at the same table as her family, sharing a pizza and whatever the restaurant’s special for the day is. She wants you to sit next to Soonyoung and play nice, even though you currently can’t stomach the thought of being anywhere near him.

For some reason, it makes you want to cry.

To lose somebody in a breakup is painful, yes. To lose all the things that came with it— like the family that you might have learned to love yourself?

A different type of ache all together.

Your smile is so painfully fake, almost hurting the edges of your mouth, as you try to let her down gently. “I wouldn’t want to impose,” you say. “But thank you for thinking of me.”

For once, The Great Pretenders is met with negative reviews.

Then again, nothing ever really escaped Mama Kwon’s scrutinizing gaze. She surveys your expression and purses her lips. You can practically see the way that the cogs turn in her brain, as if trying to decide on the response that will do the least amount of damage.

It doesn’t matter how gentle she tries to be. The words that she eventually extends still hurt like a bitch.

“He still talks about you a lot,” she muses.

Oh.

“Oh?”

“Nothing bad,” Mama Kwon says quickly. She laughs again, smiling very much like how her son might.

“Just—” She leans in. Your body autonomously mimics the action.

You’re reminded of being younger, of when she’d do the exact same thing to whisper you some ‘secret’. I got Soonyoung new shoes for Christmas. The car side mirror is busted because of me. I packed you extra of those choco pies you like.

Today, she whispers, “I think he came home for you.”

“Why did you come home?”

“I had a nightmare that I visited and I couldn’t recognize a thing. All the street names were different. The buildings were new. I kept running, trying to look for something familiar, and I just— I was just lost. And that sucked. This was mine once. You know?”

“It still is.”

“You don’t have to lie to me. It isn’t anymore. It hasn’t been for a long time.”

“You know, I really have missed your mother’s cooking.”

You smile ruefully at Soonyoung’s words.

He’s digging heartily into your mother’s signature kimchi jjigae, and you have half the mind to tell him to close his mouth as he chews. Instead, you let him devour the dish.

It had taken a little bit of masterminding to pull this off. Maybe it would’ve been easier to send Soonyoung a text of Let’s meet up, but your blasted pride was one of the last things you had left. You’d be damned if you were going to give that away, too.

You enlisted Jihoon and Wonwoo’s help in orchestrating this, in convincing Soonyoung that he could sneak into your family restaurant undetected. Sure, the blonde had been more than a little miffed when his friends ditched him and left him with you, though his irritation was short-lived in the face of the food he had been craving for God-knows-how-long.

“Maybe that’s because you’ve only been eating shin ramyun,” you point out.

Soonyoung barely looks up from his bowl as he shovels more food into his mouth. “Low blow,” he says in between bites.

You wince. “Sorry.”

“You’re not really sorry.”

“No, I am.”

That drags Soonyoung’s attention away from his stew.

His guarded expression slots right back into place, like he’s realizing you have some ulterior motive beyond feeding him. He rests his spoon against his bowl and leans back into his chair. With one eyebrow raised, he says, “This feels a lot like the lead-in to a breakup.”

A bark of laughter escapes you. Of course Soonyoung would make a joke like that.

You reach into your pocket until you’ve found what you’re looking for. Wordlessly, you slide it across the table until it’s resting by Soonyoung’s hand.

“I’ll give you a discount,” you tell him. “But only, like, fifteen percent. Anything more than that is just pushing it.”

Your calling card stares up at him. It bears your name along with your firm’s address, your phone number, and your title. Consumer bankruptcy lawyer.

Even now, Soonyoung can’t help but be expressive. His wide eyes are fixed on the card you’ve laid out. For a moment, your offer hangs in precious balance, but you don’t have a single urge to take it back. It’s entirely, wholly for Soonyoung to take.

He asks the question that you know is coming. “Why are you doing this?” he says, his words like a raw nerve.

You almost smile. Almost.

In the past week that you’ve mulled it over, you’ve reached at least a dozen different answers.

Because Jihoon and Wonwoo worry about you.

Because it’s the right thing to do.

Because Teacher Kang talks about you like you hung the stars and the moon.

Because I owe you one.

Because I don’t want you to let Mama Kwon down.

Because I’ve missed you, and I want you to be happy, even if that happiness has nothing to do with me.

The answer that eventually, finally comes to you is none of the above.

You simply say, “Because you’re my favorite ex.”

The call asking for your help never comes.

A couple of days after that lunch, you find something on your desk. Your calling card.

If it weren’t for one small thing, you would’ve thought that it was a stray card of yours that you’d forgotten. But then you catch sight of a doodle in one corner right before you’re about to tuck the card away in your closet.

A crude drawing of a tiger, with crescent-shaped eyes and a toothy smile.

You instantly know what it means. Sure enough, you hear from Jihoon that same evening.

Kwon Soonyoung has left as quietly as he arrived.

There is relief. There is regret. How you feel ultimately doesn’t matter, because you knew it would always come to this— a choice being made.

He left. You stayed.

The world spins madly on.

The last of the snow is melting on an unassuming Tuesday afternoon when your phone pings in your pocket. You fish it out to find two texts from an unknown number. The first is a link to a news article.

You’re suspicious, but curiosity always did kill the cat. The article loads and fills your screen.

Eye of the Tiger Dance Studio To Start Offering Child-Friendly Dance Lessons

By: Xu Minghao

SEOUL, South Korea – Eye of the Tiger Dance Studio, founded by renowned choreographer and performer Kwon Soonyoung, better known as HOSHI, is expanding its mission to inspire a new generation of dancers. The studio announced it will officially begin offering child-friendly dance lessons following a successful pilot program last month.

Parents and young aspiring dancers can look forward to the official launch of child-friendly lessons early next year. According to HOSHI, the initiative aims to “nurture the joy of dance from an early age and build a foundation for self-expression and confidence.”

The studio piloted its first all-children dance classes in January, offering a creative and supportive environment for young dancers to explore movement. The program’s success has led to an upcoming showcase featuring the children at the KB Art Hall in Gangnam.

HOSHI, celebrated for his innovative choreography and passion for dance, revealed the inspiration behind this new direction.

“There was a time I felt lost, like I had lost my purpose for dance,” HOSHI shared, reflecting on a challenging period in his career. “I was going through the motions, using dance as a way to distract myself from everything else, rather than embracing it as a part of who I am.”

“But I realized something important recently,” he goes on. “Dance shouldn’t be an escape or a vacation. It should be a homecoming.”

And that’s exactly what they hope to do with their upcoming showcase. Details on the event can be found here.

The second text bears only a couple of words, but it changes the ending of everything.

There’s only one seat that will matter in that auditorium, it reads.

Please make sure it’s not empty.

“Why did you come home?”

“Home had you.”

#winterwithyoucollab #svthub #mansaenetwork #soonyoung x reader #hoshi x reader #svt x reader #seventeen x reader #soonyoung imagines #hoshi imagines #soonyoung fic #hoshi fic #soonyoung angst #hoshi angst #svt fic #seventeen fic #୨ৎ penned by ylangelegy #୨ৎ muse .ᐟ svt #( <3 here it is! my love my light the fruit of my labor etc. )#( annotations/editing are imminent. but for now know i was insaneee over this )

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virtu4langel · 19 days ago

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Between us ⋆˙⟡ —

Lee heeseung x Fem! Reader

summary: you have a crush on yunjin’s brother

genre: fluff

warnings: kissing

Yunjin had always been the center of your world. Your best friend, your partner in crime. From the moment the two of you met in middle school, you’d been inseparable. Sleepovers turned into weekend hangouts, and soon, her house became like your second home.

But there was one thing you hadn’t told her that you had a crush on her older brother, Heeseung.

At first, he was just Yunjin’s brother. A lanky high school senior when you were still figuring out your freshman schedule. Back then, you hardly paid him any attention, save for the occasional polite “Hi” when he passed by. But as the years went on, Heeseung grew up—and so did you.

Now, at 22, Heeseung had returned from university for winter break, and it was impossible to ignore him. His charm, his easy smile, the way his eyes lingered on you just a second too long—it was enough to make your pulse race. But you knew better than to act on it. He was Yunjin’s brother, after all, and crossing that line would mean risking everything.

The first time you saw Heeseung again, it was a crisp December evening. Yunjin had invited you over for a holiday movie marathon, and you had eagerly agreed, oblivious to the fact that Heeseung would be home.

“Y/N!” Yunjin greeted you at the door, pulling you into a hug. “Come on, I’ve already got the snacks ready!”

You slipped off your coat and followed her inside, the warmth of the house instantly enveloping you. As you stepped into the living room, a familiar figure caught your eye.

Heeseung was sprawled on the couch, dressed casually in a black hoodie and sweatpants, scrolling through his phone. When he looked up and saw you, his face lit up.

“Well, if it isn’t my favorite of Yunjin’s friends,” he teased, sitting up.

Your heart skipped a beat at his words, though you tried to play it cool. “Hey, Heeseung. Long time no see.”

“Yeah, it has been a while,” he said, his smile softening. “You look good.”

“Thanks,” you replied, feeling a blush creep up your neck.

Before the conversation could go any further, Yunjin grabbed your hand and pulled you toward the kitchen. “Don’t let him distract you,” she said, rolling her eyes. “We’ve got movies to watch.”

Over the next week, you found yourself bumping into Heeseung more and more. Whether it was in the kitchen while grabbing snacks or in the living room when he decided to join you and Yunjin for a movie, he always seemed to be around.

At first, it felt harmless—just friendly banter and fleeting glances. But as the days went on, you couldn’t ignore the way your stomach flipped every time he smiled at you, or the way his voice softened when he said your name.

One evening, after Yunjin had gone to bed early, you found yourself alone in the living room with Heeseung.

“Mind if I sit?” he asked, gesturing to the spot next to you on the couch.

“Go ahead,” you said, trying to sound casual even as your heart raced.

He settled in beside you, the warmth of his presence making it impossible to focus on the movie playing on the screen. After a few minutes of silence, he spoke.

“You’ve been spending a lot of time here lately,” he said, his tone teasing.

“Blame your sister,” you replied with a small laugh. “She keeps inviting me over.”

“Well, I’m not complaining,” he said, his voice low enough that it sent a shiver down your spine.

You glanced at him, unsure of how to respond. But before you could say anything, he smiled and turned his attention back to the screen, leaving you to wonder if you had imagined the tension in the air.

It wasn’t until the annual Lee family holiday party that things came to a head. Yunjin had insisted you come, and you’d reluctantly agreed, knowing Heeseung would be there.

The party was livey. But despite the festive atmosphere, you couldn’t seem to shake your nervous energy.

You were standing by the fireplace, sipping on a glass of cider, when Heeseung appeared beside you.

“Enjoying the party?” he asked, his voice cutting through the noise around you.

“It’s nice,” you said, glancing at him. “What about you?”

“It’s better now,” he said, his eyes locking onto yours.

The weight of his gaze made your breath catch, and for a moment, it felt like the rest of the room had disappeared.

Before you could respond, someone called his name, pulling him away. But even as he walked off, you felt the lingering heat of his presence, his words replaying in your mind.

That night, after the party had wound down, you stayed over at Yunjin’s house. While she fell asleep quickly, you found yourself wide awake, your thoughts racing.

Unable to sit still, you crept downstairs to get some water.

You didn’t expect to find Heeseung there, leaning against the counter with a glass in hand.

“Couldn’t sleep?” he asked, his voice soft.

You shook your head, stepping into the kitchen. “Too much on my mind.”

“Same,” he said, setting his glass down. “Want to talk about it?”

You hesitated, unsure of how to respond. But something about the quiet intimacy of the moment made you speak. “Heeseung… what are we doing?”

He blinked, caught off guard by your question. “What do you mean?”

“I mean this,” you said, gesturing between the two of you. “The looks, the flirting… it’s not nothing, is it?”

Heeseung sighed, running a hand through his hair. “No,” he admitted. “It’s not nothing. But I didn’t want to push you. I didn’t want to make things complicated for you.”

You stared at him, your heart pounding. “And Yunjin?”

“She’d probably kill me if she knew,” he said with a wry smile. “But… I can’t keep pretending I don’t feel this way.”

His words hung in the air, heavy with meaning. Slowly, he took a step closer, his eyes searching yours. “Do you feel the same?”

For a moment, you hesitated, the weight of his question pressing down on you. But then you thought about the way your heart raced around him, the way his presence felt like home, and you knew there was only one answer.

“Yes,” you said softly. “I do.”

Relief washed over his face, and he closed the distance between you, his hand cupping your cheek as he leaned in.

The kiss was gentle at first, hesitant and unsure. But as his lips moved against yours, all the tension, all the unspoken feelings, melted away, leaving only warmth and certainty.

After the last two weeks you and Heeseung had been dating in secret — at least from yunjins knowledge but you had to tell her eventually.

So one day you and Heeseung brought Yunjin to talk. She raised an eyebrow, glancing between the two of you. “Why do you both look so serious?”

Yunjin’s eyes narrowed, and for a moment, she looked like she was about to panic. “Oh my God, are you two dating?”

You blinked, caught off guard by her directness. “Uh… yes?”

To your surprise, Yunjin didn’t seem angry. Instead, she let out an exaggerated groan. “Ugh, I knew it. You two have been acting weird for weeks.”

“You’re not mad?” Heeseung asked cautiously.

“Mad? No,” she said, rolling her eyes. “But if you hurt her,Lee Heeseung, I will make your life miserable.”

Heeseung chuckled, his grip on your hand tightening. “Noted.”

#heeseung x reader #heeseung #enhypen x you #heeseung x you #fem reader #enhypen x reader #heeseung x yn #enhypen #enhypen fluff #enhypen heeseung #y/n #reader

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lipglossanon · 9 months ago

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Red Flags and Long Nights

Real Dad!Leon S. Kennedy x daughter fem!reader (one shot)

hello hello 👋 this is the fic written for the milestone celebration poll winner (real dad taking accidental viagra); big big thanks to all of you who have gotten me here!! 💜 💜 I’m so thankful everyday that you guys choose to read/like/share/interact with my fics and just me in general! 🥰 so without further ado, I hope you enjoy this one shot!!!

WARNINGS: 18+ MDNI, INCEST, dead dove content, dad/daughter incest, groping, slight cnc, dirty talk, breast play, oral (m receiving), kissing, teasing, unprotected sex, creampie

not proofread 😅 some of it was written while sleepy so hopefully it makes sense haha

title from Red Flags and Long Nights from She Wants Revenge

<<prequel: Oh By Gosh, By Golly>>

One day, your mom calls you up out of the blue wanting to talk about planning a family vacation this year. Somewhere with sandy beaches and clear blue water. Something over an extended weekend once everyone can take off work. She’s already talked it over with your dad and he’s agreeable as long as it doesn’t cost an arm and a leg.

As she talks, you pull open your calendar and look over your work schedule. Once you find a date that works, she promises to text you the details of the Air B&B she plans to book. You bid her goodbye and hang up the phone, quietly excited about a beach trip even if it is with your parents.

You keep busy as you slowly count down the days; long graduated from college but still struggling to find work in your major, you’ve had to settle for any job opportunity that will pay the bills. Luckily enough, you were hired to work at the local post office. It’s not a glamorous job by any means, but you do get federal holidays off and your boss is pretty lenient with you. It’s a cinch to put in your PTO for the extended weekend you plan to spend with your parents.

The morning you drive down to the beach house is pleasant; it’s early enough you miss out on a bunch of traffic which helps you save enough time to splurge a little and grab some coffee. Following the GPS, you get to the beach house in the afternoon with plenty of sunshine left to enjoy. Your parent’s car is already parked outside so you don’t have to worry about figuring out how to unlock the joint.

You grab your small suitcase and make your way into the lovely three story home. As you walk up the gravel sidewalk, you take in how secluded the area truly is and how lucky your mom was in getting such a nice place. You’re pretty sure it cost out the ass, but hey who’re you to deny such generosity?

The door swings open before you touch the handle and your mom pulls you into a hug.

“Oh honey, I’m so happy you could make it!”

Breathing in the perfume embedded into your brain from childhood, you give her a quick squeeze back before pulling away.

“Me too,” you smile, “this place is amazing!”

She laughs and moves further into the house, looking back as you follow along behind after closing the door.

“A friend of a friend owns this place so it was pretty easy to get. Even your father can’t throw one of his little hissy fits about the cost,” she rolls her eyes and you breathe out a laugh.

“Where is he?” You look around but only see the open kitchen leading off into the dining room.

“Down at the beach,” she points to the sliding glass doors on the other side of the living room, “I told him I wanted to stay up here for when you arrived.”

You nod and smile at her again, “Thanks, I appreciate it. I’m gonna go put my stuff up and change then we can head down ourselves.”

She nods, “There’s a handful of bedrooms on the second and third floor. Your dad and I are staying in the master down here so you have your choice of rooms.”

“Nice, be back in a sec,” grabbing your luggage, you climb the stairs to scout out where you want to sleep.

You pick a cute room on the third floor; it has a little balcony with a couple of chairs that gives you a fantastic view for miles around. You toss your clothes into the dresser and quickly change into your swimsuit. Grabbing a towel and some sunscreen, you slide on your sandals and make your way back downstairs. Your mom, wearing a big floppy hat, is already standing outside the sliding doors.

You chatter with each other, just catching up on your day to day, while you both make your way down the little path that leads out onto the beach. As soon as your sandals hit the sand, you see a huge beach umbrella.

“Glad to know he won’t burn,” your mom laughs, toeing off her own sandals to walk barefoot over to your dad.

Following her lead, you take off your sandals and carry them over to the blanket underneath the shade of the umbrella.

“‘Bout time,” a groggy baritone meets your ears.

“Shush, Leon, it didn’t kill you to nap on the beach now did it?”

Your dad just mumbles a reply to your mom before raising up. He squints over at you, eyes heavy lidded from sleep as you set your stuff down.

“The drive okay?”

You laugh and finally look over at him, “It was fine.”

His blue eyes sharpen as they read your expression before darting down to give you a once over. Your nipples tighten against your will and his gaze seems to linger there for a split second before flicking back up to your face. Plastering on a fake smile, you sit down and grab your sunscreen.

“Want some help with that?” Your dad nods to the little bottle in your hands.

“S-sure.”

You kinda hope the ground splits open to swallow you whole, but instead you just move over to where your dad is sitting up on the blanket, hand outstretched to grab the sunscreen.

“Well while you two do that, I’m going to go take a dip,” your mom beams at you, completely leaving you alone to wallow in this newfound awkwardness.

Keeping your back to your dad, you feel his broad calloused palms drag the slick lotion all over your back and shoulders, deftly massaging it in. For the last few years, there’s been a line of tension between you and Leon. An accidental kiss under the mistletoe where you both used too much tongue to be appropriate (any tongue isn’t appropriate but you’re blaming the alcohol everyone had been drinking).

Since then, you’ve both watched the other. Glances too heated to be innocent, brushing against each other unnecessarily… and now with his sun warmed hands rubbing across your back, your brain empties as your body buzzes with arousal.

It’s why it takes a second for you to realize that your dad has moved on to rubbing in the sunblock across your ribs and over your clavicle. His hands come up and cup your breasts, stiff nipples showing through the fabric.

“Gotta make sure to get everywhere,” his breath gusts past your ear as his hands slip under your top and massages the fat of your breasts.

“Ohh,” you whimper quietly, cunt pulsing warmly in time with your heartbeat.

He squeezes and rubs across your soft skin, fingers plucking at your stiff peaks until you moan brokenly.

“Dad,” your breathy exaltation has him pinching and twisting your nipples before groping your breasts roughly in his hands.

“‘M almost done,” he licks the shell of your ear and your thighs twitch, “you’ve got such nice tits, princess. Don’t want’em to burn.”

You press your hand over your mouth to muffle the whine you let slip. With one last harsh pinch to your nipples, he lets go, scooting back away from you.

“Should be good to go,” he grins at your dazed look, “don’t keep your mom waiting.”

Shaking your head, you blink rapidly and slowly climb to your feet. As you pass by Leon, his hand reaches up and smacks your ass hard.

“Be a good girl, okay?”

“Y-yeah, dad.”

You pad out to the ocean, waving to your mom as she looks for seashells in the shallow water. Wading out far enough for water to hit your chest, you finally let yourself sigh out loud.

“What in the fuck?!”

You rub wet hands over your face as you gaze out onto the horizon. Flirting is one thing, but getting felt up by your dad is definitely crossing the line. You shiver, clit still throbbing as you reach down to press your palm against your cunt. Even as messed up as it may make you, you wish he would’ve slipped his hand down and fingered your pussy.

The sun glaring off the water makes you squint even as you enjoy the scenery, trying your best to squish all the other thoughts and feelings you’ve had in the past half hour down into a little box you can open later. It works for a time, until the squinting becomes too much and the glare is driving sharp little needles into your brain.

Leaving the water, you make your way over to your mom as she scoops up more shells with a net.

“I’m gonna head in, got a bit of a headache,” you wince as the sun bounces off her watch into your eyes.

“Let me walk with you,” she frowns, “you’re looking a little washed out.”

You nod and follow her back up to the beach blanket, eyes skirting over where your dad’s lounging reading a book.

“We’re headed up to the house, do you need anything?”

Your mom grabs her bag and your stuff as your dad sets his book down onto his lap. He looks at you then back to his wife.

“No, once I finish this, I’ll be heading up, too.”

She hums and takes you by the arm, helping guide you back to the house since the pain beats a tempo behind your eyes and makes your vision a little blurry. Once in the house, she helps you upstairs to your room. In doing so, she makes sure to stop in at the bathroom on the bottom floor to point out the migraine medicine in the cabinet.

Entering your room, she sits you down on your bed. She tucks you in and makes sure to close the blinds before walking back into the hallway. Turning, she gives you a concerned look.

“I’m going to head into town. It’s about an hour's drive from here so I won’t be back til later. If you need anything, call, okay?”

You hum in reply already drifting to sleep in hopes you’ll feel better once you crash for a few hours. The nap helps and by the time you come to, your headache is completely gone. Waking up is a chore however; it takes you a minute to realize where you are, eyelids sticking together, gummy with sleep.

Raising up on your elbows, you reach over to the side table and grab your phone. Eyebrows pinching together, you blink sluggishly until you can read the time. It’s only late afternoon even if it feels like you’ve slept through the night. Climbing out of bed, you change before leaving your room with a plan on grabbing some water from the kitchen.

It’s noticeably quiet as you finally step out on the bottom floor. Your mom must still be gone since you don’t see her shoes by the front door.

“Fuck.”

You hear the muttered curse from the half open bathroom door that you’re walking past heading to the kitchen.

“Everything okay?”

You slowly press the door all the way open and your dad fumbles with a towel before placing it over his lap as he sits heavily down on the edge of the tub.

“I thought you were out with your mother,” he bites out, tone sharp.

“No,” you frown, leaning against the doorjamb, “I had a headache and took a nap. Are you alright?”

He blows out a breath and scrubs a hand over his face.

“I’m fine. What time did she say she’d be back?”

You shrug, “Couple of hours I think. I don’t really remember.”

“Goddamn it.”

“Should I call—“

“No,” Leon nearly shouts, “no, don’t. It’s not a big deal.”

“Dad, I can help I just need to know what’s wrong,” you step closer into the bathroom.

He laughs without any humor, “Sure.”

You go to ask him why when your eyes catch on the bottle sitting by the sink. It’s similar to the migraine medicine you saw in the medicine cabinet earlier, the one your mom pointed out if the nap didn’t get rid of your headache. Who knew your dad needed help getting it up?

“Did you..?”

You trail off, feeling awkward and nervous and disgustingly turned on to think your dad’s dick is hard underneath that flimsy towel.

“Yes,” he sounds tired, “I thought it was the other medicine.”

“Ohh,” you bite your lip, brain completely in the gutter as your eyes drift down to his lap, “I mean, I can still help.”

It seems insane but your dad’s not stopping you as you shuffle closer to stand between his legs. His blue eyes stay steady on yours as you kneel in the floor, knees digging into the soft rug in front of the tub. Leon tugs his briefs down and his cock slaps against his stomach, precum drooling from the head. He’s so hard, the foreskin has drawn back from the tip showcasing how red and swollen his cock has gotten from the medication.

“Oh my god,” you breathe out, eyes greedily taking him in.

“Fuck, don’t look at it like that,” he groans, hands gripping the tub so tight his knuckles blanch.

“You’re just really big,” you press the dough of your thighs together, trying to put a little pressure on your throbbing clit, “you’ve got the fattest cock I’ve ever seen, dad.”

You watch as precum blurts from the tip to drip all down his length while he moans low in his throat.

“Christ, you’ve got a filthy mouth,” his pupils are blown as he gazes down at you, “since you like how big my dick is, sweetheart, why don’t you show me, hmm?”

Your tongue licks up all the precum leaking down his dick before softly suckling on the head.

“Oh fuck, that’s it,” he grunts, “suck that cock.”

Moaning, you bob your head down, tongue tracing the thick vein you can feel on the side as you sink down inch by inch. Your dad pulls out to trace your lips with his drippy tip, smearing precum across your mouth like sticky gloss. You moan and press a kiss to his dick, tongue lapping at the crown until he’s rocking back into your mouth. Humming low in your throat makes his cock kick in your mouth, precum coating your tongue.

“Damn, so good,” he groans, hand smoothing across your jaw, cradling it as he pulls his cock out, “never get head from your mom anymore. Feels so good.”

More slick wets your panties as you mewl, throat clicking as you swallow around his thick length. You hungrily suck his cock, tongue circling his head before dipping into the slit to taste more of his precum.

“Like sucking me off, sweetheart?” he tosses the fringe away from his eyes while he rocks his hips, pushing himself deeper into your throat with smooth strokes until you gag heavily.

“Love that, choke on it a bit more and I’ll be spilling down your slutty throat.”

Thick strands of saliva bridge between your mouth and his dick like shimmery spiderwebs as he slips out. You moan when he ruts his cock across your tongue. Leon groans and reaches down to tap his cock against your lips before feeding it back to you. Whining, you suck him deeper into your mouth, licking across the head before messily bobbing your head further down his thick length.

“I'm about t’cum, swallow it all up, princess,” he thrusts a few more times before pulling out until the tip is sitting fat and heavy on your tongue.

Leon grunts and moans as hot thick spurts of cum fill your mouth. Swallowing quickly, you try to keep his cum from spilling out around your lips, but it ends up leaving a sticky mess to drip down your chin in thick strands.

You watch as he groans, stomach flexing while you suckle on the head of his dick, making sure to not miss any of his hot jizz as his balls empty into your mouth. After giving the tip of his dick a kiss, you pull back and wipe the spend from your face with the bottom of your shirt.

Your cunt feels soaked, panties sticking to your pussy lips as you shakily stand onto your feet.

“Where do you think you’re going?”

Your dad stands up beside you, cock still hard and leaking, making you whimper. Pulling his briefs back up, he leaves his shorts and shirt lying on the floor. He grabs you by the forearm and leads you out of the bathroom and all the way upstairs into your room.

“No surprises if your mom comes home early,” he informs you, pushing you further into your room followed by closing and locking your door.

Heat radiates from your cunt, more slick dripping into the already soaked gusset of your panties. Leon shoves you back onto your bed before climbing on top of you, kissing you heatedly as he sinks down onto your body. You wrap your legs around his waist while you run your hands through his messy hair. You're so turned on you can’t think straight anymore.

“Thatta girl,” he coos, pulling back to drop kisses across your neck, “can’t wait to feel your wet little pussy, baby.”

You whimper and pull him back up into another kiss. This time he licks into your mouth messily, spit dripping from the corners of your lips to slide down your jaw. You feel him grind his cock against you before pulling away.

He sits back on his haunches and slips his briefs off, maneuvering until he can toss them into the floor. Next, he leans forward and grips the bands of your panties and shorts. You help him, shimmying to move your clothes down off of your legs. As he moves those into the floor, you slip your shirt off and let it too fall onto the pile of clothing.

“God, love your tits,” he groans, shoving his face into your breasts, mouth licking and biting every inch of skin they come across.

His mouth suctions around a nipple, tongue teasing the stiff bud as he tweaks the opposite one with his fingers.

“Dad,” you moan, nails digging into his scalp.

“What?” He coos, “your dad can’t show his appreciation?”

A whine rasps from your throat and Leon laughs meanly before biting the swollen bud he was sucking. With a grunt, he moves across your sternum, leaving hot open mouthed kisses across your chest until he can suckle and tease the other nipple, fingers plucking and pinching at the now wet one.

Your hips writhe, leaking cunt dragging against his stomach as his cock grinds against the cleft of your ass.

“Gonna let daddy stuff your tight wet cunt?” He chuckles as your eyes flutter as he lathes your nipples with broad swipes of his tongue.

“Yes,” you whisper, “wanna feel you split me open. You’re so big.”

Whining on the last word, you rock down, feeling his tip catch against your pussy lips and driving you crazy.

He growls and sits back on his heels, taking his cock in hand to smack it against your clit.

“So slutty,” his pupils swallow the blue of his eyes, “want daddy to stretch this little hole out? Show you how a real dick feels?”

Nodding along with his words, you suck your bottom lip into your mouth, teeth sinking into the plush skin.

“Goddamn,” he mutters, spitting in his hand to slick his cock before pressing the head against your soaked heat.

Using his thumb, he presses his cock down so the tip slides into your hole. Keeping it there, he rocks against your hips, sinking inch by inch into your pulsing cunt as his thumb keeps his cock steady. Pulling halfway out, he flexes his hips and thrusts forward faster than before.

“Even your mom doesn’t let me go raw anymore,” he chuckles, bottoming out so fast you choke on air, “so this is a real treat, sweetheart.”

“Ohh god, dad,” you moan, voice high as he starts sliding his cock in and out of your pussy, rough thrusts that make your breasts bounce.

You whine when he grinds against you, his pelvis rubbing over your swollen clit just right. His balls smack against your ass on every thrust, the loud plap plap plap of skin driving your arousal even higher.

“Dad, fuck, s’too much,” you gasp out another whine, head feeling dizzy as your blood rushes, arousal making your pulse feel heavy in your throat.

He groans and drops his weight down on you, bare skin sticking together from the sweat building between your bodies. Leon kisses across your neck, mouth grazing your skin with barely there nips that makes your pussy flutter around his cock.

The thatch of hair at the base of Leon’s cock grazes your sensitive clit, sending little electric shocks of pleasure that brings tears to your eyes. You feel so good, you can’t stop the slutty noises from leaving your mouth. Rutting into your body, your dad’s fat cock grinds against the spongy spot along the front of your cunt. Slick gushes from your pussy as he hammers your g-spot so perfectly you can’t help but squeeze him tighter and tighter.

“Princess,” he murmurs in your ear, “is this little pussy gonna cum? You’re so soft and wet— I can feel you tightening up around me. God so much tighter than your mom, can’t believe I’ve been missing out.”

His words push you over the edge. You babble out little chants of dad, dad, dad until a guttural moan spills from your throat, thighs jumping as your pussy clamps down on Leon’s dick like a vice.

Your low moaning twists into a scream as his hand sneaks down to rub and tease your clit. Instead of your orgasm tapering off, it ramps up, gaining speed until it hurtles you into cumming again.

“Aww, she’s gripping me so tight,” Leon mocks sweetly in your ear, “yeah, that’s it, sweetheart.”

“Dad,” you whimper, tears clumping your eyelashes, “dad, please.”

A moan rumbles from his chest and he humps your cunt faster, cock never pulling completely out as he ruts inside your slick pussy walls. Half a dozen thrusts more and he’s growling down at you, pressing his cock balls deep into your cunt, thick cum spurting from the tip of his dick to stuff you full.

“Oh so tight, baby,” he sighs, hips pressed against yours as he spills inside your snug little cunt, “your little pussy fits me like a glove.”

Shuddering, your walls milk another small load of cum from his heavy balls and he pants noisily against your clavicle. He presses up onto his forearms, hips swiveling to pull his cock halfway out before sinking it back inside, a mix of your creamy arousal and his spend making a ring around the base.

“Good, huh,” his laugh tinges on mocking, “don’t worry, ‘m not done with my daughter’s cute pussy, gonna keep you here for as long as it takes.”

After that, it’s all a pleasurable blur. You're unsure how many orgasms your dad has given you at this point, but you know he’s only had three and his cock is still so thick and hard.

“Think this one will be it, princess,” he grunts, hoisting your limp thighs up, the bend of your knees slotting perfectly over the bend of his arms.

You can only pant in reply, mouth as dry as cotton. He notches the head of his drooling dick at your entrance, dragging the tip up to smear the cum from his last creampie all over your used cunt.

“One last load for your greedy little pussy,” he grins down at you, “then we can take a shower.”

He sinks his cock into your sore pussy at the same time he leans forward, pressing your sweaty bodies together. Your eyes roll back as the tip of his cock kisses your cervix, thighs shaking against his arms.

“So deep,” he groans, “best cunt I’ve ever fucked and to think it belongs to my sweet daughter.”

Your pussy spasms and clenches down on his thick length as you cry out. Brain melting pleasure seeps down your spine as he pulls out to grind across your g-spot before fucking back into your cunt roughly.

“S’good, dad,” you mewl, mouth drooling as he hammers his cock into your sensitive hole, “so good.”

“I know,” he croons, “I feel good, too. Not g’nna be able to give up this sweet little pussy. She grips me too good, baby, I’m gonna want her all the time.”

Another orgasm slams into your body, pussy pulsing and sucking his cock into your hole as your head thrashes against the bed. Leon’s hands grip your wrists to push them down against the bed so you don’t scratch him.

“Fuck, milking your dad’s cock like you’re made for it,” he groans, humping into your pussy with deep strokes until you’re crying from overstimulation.

“Shh, shh, just take it a little more, ‘m about to cum,” he licks into your mouth, biting on your bottom lip before pulling back, “that’s it, take it, take your dad’s dick deep into that hot, greedy little pussy.”

Hiccuping a sob, your cunt steadily milks his cock as he buries himself all the way, as deep into your pussy as possible. He grunts against your skin as he grinds his dick against your cervix, spilling rope after rope of cum to paint your walls white. The sticky heat makes your clit throb even as your body aches, wanting to succumb to exhaustion.

The distant question of how your mom isn’t back yet buzzes at the corner of your consciousness. You must slur it out loud cause Leon laughs as he pulls his softening cock from your puffy leaking cunt.

“She texted you to say she got stuck in a traffic jam and the road’s blocked for a few hours,” he sighs as he slaps his cock down onto your messy pussy, a wet splat that makes you wince.

“Dad, ‘m sore,” you pout.

“So sorry, baby,” he coos, a grin overtaking his face, “want me to kiss it and make it better?”

Chest fluttering at the thought, you go to agree when your phone buzzes with an incoming call. Leon grabs it to silence it but turns to look at you.

“It’s your mom,” he chuckles, handing it over to you, “better see what she wants.”

Sliding it open, her voice rings out clear in the quiet of your room.

“Hey honey, your dad didn’t answer but I wanted to say I’m about five minutes from the house if you wanted to preheat the oven for this frozen pizza I picked up,” she laughs to herself, “well, it was frozen.”

Your dad sits down on the edge of the bed, listening in to the conversation.

“Okay, sure, we’ll see ya when you get here,” Leon nods at you, “bye, mom.”

After she says goodbye, you put the phone back on the side table.

“Well we should get cleaned up,” Leon helps you stand on weak legs, “I’ll help you to the tub and I’ll head downstairs.”

“Thanks, dad,” you smile up at him and he drops a kiss on your cheek.

“Of course,” he leads you out into the hallway, helping you inside the little bathroom next to your room.

He sits you down onto the toilet, turning on the shower to allow it time to heat up.

“Thanks,” he murmurs, pressing a soft kiss on your temple, “I know it’s all kinds of fucked up, but I still love you.”

Heart beating double time, you give him a crooked smile, “I love you too, dad.”

He presses his lips together, looking like he wants to say more, but he blows out a harsh breath and walks back out into the hall.

“I’ll handle the oven and your mom, you just come downstairs when you’re ready.”

“I will,” you say as he swings the door shut.

Sitting there with your thoughts, you let yourself feel. Satisfaction filters through followed by a smidgen of guilt and shame. You hate that your mom is an innocent party in all of this, but you don’t regret letting your dad fuck your brains out. And since this is a complete one off, it’s just a little family secret that you’ll both be taking to the grave.

Once steam wafts from the shower, you stand up and step into the warm water. You whimper as the heat works on your sore muscles. By this time tomorrow, this will all seem like some really deranged fantasy you dreamt up. Finishing up in the shower, you dry off and make your way back to your room. Getting dressed, you descend downstairs, the smell of pizza growing stronger.

“Oh there you are! Feeling better?”

Your mom comes around the counter to feel your forehead.

“Yeah, I just slept it off.”

She ushers you to sit down at the table and brings the pizza over, your dad following behind with the drinks. Your mom sits to your right and your dad sits across from you both. He catches your eye and winks, making you look down at your plate out of shyness.

“Eat up, I’m sure you’re wore out from the hard day,” his mirthful tone draws your gaze back up.

“Yeah,” you clear your throat and take a drink, “it’s been a hard day alright.”

#lipglossanon #lipglossmasterlist #leon s kennedy smut #leon s kennedy x reader #leon s kennedy x you #leon s kennedy x y/n #mind the tags #dont like dont read #leon kennedy x reader #leon kennedy x you #leon kennedy x y/n #leon kennedy smut #real dad!leon s kennedy x daughter fem!reader #resident evil fanfiction

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blueskrugs · 6 months ago

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I Love You (It's Ruining My Life) | Nick Blankenburg

this is a christmas fic. in july. for demi @wyattjohnston's birthday. which was in june. does the earliness of one make up for the lateness of the other? uh. happy birthday/happy holidays, I guess? fear of commitment / secret admirer / stranded / high school sweethearts / exes to lovers length: 6.4k words

Nick Blankenburg is the boy Olivia will never get over.

There’s a framed photo in her mother’s living room from seven years ago of Nick and Olivia at senior prom. Nick’s tie and boutonniere matched Olivia’s red Sherri Hill dress and corsage. In her heels, she was a couple of inches taller than him. Olivia sees it, sees them nestled in between the rest of their family photos, every time she’s home. She loved that photo; Nick is smiling softly at her, hand on her hip as she laughs at something one of her friends was doing off-camera. There’s a blooper of that photo, of Nick making faces to keep Olivia laughing, because “her smile is better that way.” That was her phone lock screen for months after that day.

Sometimes she wishes she could hide that picture frame now, or throw it into the fireplace and watch it burn.

But that would be dramatic.

Dramatic like Nick breaking up with her two months after high school graduation, saying he needed time to “figure some things out.” Dramatic like Nick hardly talking to her for weeks before he dumped her, after they’d been dating for three years.

Olivia had cried for weeks. Nick had been her first boyfriend, her first love. Washington was a small town, and almost everyone Olivia knew had married their high school sweetheart and settled down. She’d thought that would be her and Nick, too, until Nick decided to set his sights on bigger things.

Olivia pretended to get over it and moved to Ann Arbor in the fall. Nick seemed like he was always over it, and he moved to Detroit to join Victory Honda.

Olivia threw everything she had into school. She joined a sorority, joined clubs, started coaching a local girls’ soccer team. She was doing well.

By the time she was in her third year and one of her sorority sisters was telling her about the cute overage freshman named Nick who had joined the Michigan hockey team, Olivia is doing her best impersonation of a girl who finally got over her high school boyfriend.

It doesn’t stop her from dropping her phone on her face when her friend Paige leans over from her perch on the end of Olivia’s bed to show her the newest member of the hockey team. Nick Blankenburg’s smiling face stares back at Olivia from Paige’s phone screen.

“It says he’s from Washington, d’you know him?” Paige asks, oblivious. She’s already resumed scrolling.

“Yeah, uh,” Olivia says. “I think we went to high school together.”

“Oh, cool,” Paige says, continuing her blithe scrolling again.

Olivia thinks that’s the end of it. Hopes it’s the end of it. She doesn’t frequent hockey games these days, and since Nick spent two years in juniors instead of heading straight to Michigan, it’s unlikely they’ll be crossing paths on campus any time soon.

Then the football game against Ohio State rolls around. Olivia’s boyfriend Austin had traveled from Ohio to Michigan for Thanksgiving with Olivia’s family, and he stuck around through the weekend to go to the game at The Big House. Austin sticks out like a sore thumb, decked in all red, in a sea of maize and blue, but he good naturedly kisses Olivia at kickoff, ignoring the jeers of the crowd around them.

Michigan loses. It’s a bit of a blowout.

Someone from the next section over shouts something at Austin. He turns to shout back, tightening his arm around Olivia’s waist as they try to make their way out of the stadium with the rest of the crowd. Olivia’s not sure who starts it, but someone starts shoving. Olivia gets caught in the middle of it, jostled to the side as a fight starts. There’s more yelling. Someone pushes Olivia from behind, then from the side, and she falls.

Or, starts to fall, until someone catches her. It’s oddly reminiscent of the time Olivia met Austin, at another Ohio State versus Michigan football game her freshman year, and someone had bumped into him, causing him to spill a soda on Olivia.

She looks up into the face of the hands that caught her. “Nick?” she blurts. Nick’s grip on her elbows gets tighter, before he realizes he’s squeezing and lets go. He helps Olivia to her feet again. The crush of the crowd shoves them together, and Nick’s hands slide to Olivia’s hips to steady her. She’s still staring at him in awe, as if she’s never seen him before.

Nick still hasn’t said anything. Through the crowd, someone takes Olivia’s hand. Austin. She turns to find him, following as he tugs her away from Nick.

“Who was that?” Austin asks, leaning in close to speak in Olivia’s ear. Olivia cranes her neck around, but Nick’s lost to the crowd again.

“No one,” Olivia says. “It was no one.” She’s not sure if she’s trying to convince herself or Austin.

It seems impossible to continue to avoid Nick around Ann Arbor after that. Michigan’s campus has never felt so small. She sees him in the library, studying intently with his headphones on. She sees him walking across campus, always with a few other rowdy hockey players. She sees him waiting in line for coffee at Sweetwaters in the student union. Nick tries to talk to her, once.

They were crossing paths on campus, and Nick reached out a hand. He was alone, for once.

“Liv, hey,” he’d started. Olivia takes a second to look at him properly for the first time. He’s grown up a little since they left high school, but he still looks like the same sweet Nick she used to know. She pulls her arm away from him.

“I’m late for a class, sorry,” she said. She was heading in the opposite direction of the Education building, and she thought Nick might know that. She walked away before Nick could get another word in. He never tried to talk to her again after that. They share smiles every once in a while; Olivia’s always feel fake.

The years pass. Olivia graduates, gets a job as a fourth grade teacher in Detroit. Austin moves in with her. She finally stops thinking about Nick.

When Nick signs with the Columbus Blue Jackets, Paige takes the liberty of forwarding every single Instagram post about him to Olivia. Olivia FaceTimes Paige just so she can flip her off. Paige spends the next year and a half making it her personal responsibility to keep Olivia updated on her ex-boyfriend—every injury, every goal, every time he’s sent back down to the AHL.

Olivia tries not to pay any attention to it. Keyword: tries.

Austin and Olivia drive back down to Ohio a few days before Christmas to visit his family in Columbus. Olivia very carefully doesn’t mention that Nick had been called up a few weeks back the entire drive. It had caused a fight, once, when she mindlessly dropped into a conversation about the Blue Jackets that she knew Nick. She’s never talked about him around Austin again.

Later that night, when Olivia is standing on the curb outside of Austin’s parents’, her bag by her feet, tears drying on her cheeks in the freezing air, she’s briefly grateful for Paige’s incessant updates on Nick. At least she knows that the only person she knows in this awful city isn’t actually two hours away in Cleveland. She pulls out her phone with shaky hands.

God, she hopes Nick hasn’t changed his phone number.

The phone rings for so long that Olivia thinks Nick won’t answer. She swears under her breath and starts to pull her phone away from her ear to call an Uber instead when she hears a muffled, “Hello?” on the other end of the line. It sounds like she woke him.

“Nick?” Olivia asks. A car drives by, kicking up dirty slush, and Olivia flinches. There’s a moment of silence. “You know what, never mind, I’ll just—” Olivia goes to hang up the phone again, but Nick cuts her off.

“Liv? Hang on, what’s wrong?” There’s shuffling on Nick’s end of the call. He sounds wide awake now. “Where are you, are you in trouble?”

“Can you come pick me up?” Olivia whispers.

“Text me your address, I’ll be right there.” Nick hangs up.

Olivia’s numb by the time a car pulls up to the curb in front of her. A familiar figure jumps out of the driver’s seat and runs around the front of the car to pull Olivia into a tight hug. Olivia lets herself hug Nick back for a brief second, before he’s pulling away again and reaching for her suitcase.

“Liv, it’s freezing, what the hell are you doing standing out here?” he asks. He ushers her to the passenger seat and throws her suitcase in the back of the car. The heat’s blasting, and Olivia thinks Nick turned on the seat warmer for her. Her teeth are chattering.

Nick pulls away from the curb. Olivia settles back and lets the suburbs of Columbus turn into a blur outside the windows. Nick allows her to wallow in silence for a few minutes before he turns to Olivia at a red light.

“You didn’t tell me what happened, or why you needed me to pick you up in the middle of the night from the fucking Columbus suburbs,” Nick says. He doesn’t sound angry, just worried. Washed in the red glow of the stoplight, Olivia can see the way his eyebrows crease.

“Never gave me a chance,” Olivia manages. Nick shoots her an unimpressed look, but the light turns green again, saving Olivia from Nick’s gaze.

Nick’s CarPlay is softly playing Taylor Swift on shuffle. Olivia lets it cycle through a few songs before she speaks again.

“Austin and I broke up,” Olivia says.

Nick, to his credit, doesn’t ask who Austin is. Olivia’s pretty sure he never unfollowed her on Instagram. He’s probably seen all of her sappy posts from the last six years.

Nick just clicks his tongue and says, “Sorry, Liv, that’s shitty.”

Neither of them say anything else for the rest of the drive to Nick’s apartment. Olivia gawks out the window as they approach what is, apparently, Nick’s building.

“What?” Nick asks, pulling carefully into a spot in the parking garage.

“Nick, this is bougie as hell.” Olivia has never felt so far from Washington, Michigan in her life.

Nick shrugs as he puts his car in park and climbs out. He pulls Olivia’s suitcase out before opening her door for her. “It’s not that fancy.”

Olivia smacks him on the chest. She’s struck, suddenly, at how solid Nick’s become now that they’ve grown up. Now that they don’t know each other. The reminder of how different they are, how far they’ve come since high school, shocks Olivia into silence as she follows Nick up the elevator and to his apartment door.

He shoots her another worried look over his shoulder as he unlocks the door. “Are you sure you’re okay? Are you still cold?” He pulls Olivia by the wrist across the threshold and over to his couch. He turns on the gas fireplace, which Olivia raises her eyebrows at.

“Not that fancy,” she murmurs. Nick’s still bustling around, turning his heat up, disappearing into his bedroom and re-emerging with an armful of blankets, dressed in sweats and a ratty Michigan T-shirt. He throws a blanket at Olivia’s face. She rips it off, sputtering, before she realizes what it is. “You still have this?” she asks, incredulous.

The blanket in question is a T-shirt blanket, emblazoned all over with Romeo High School—dozens of Nick’s high school T-shirts, cut up and quilted together by Olivia’s mom after they had graduated. Olivia has a matching one, laid across the foot of her bed back in Detroit.

Nick looks sheepish for the first time since he picked up Olivia. “My mom, uh, helped me move in here, and she wanted to make sure I was never cold, I guess.”

The blanket looks worn, like it’s been used and washed dozens of times since they were eighteen. Olivia doesn’t call Nick out on it.

Nick settles on his couch next to Olivia. “I’m, uh, driving home first thing in the morning if you want to come with,” he says awkwardly.

Olivia chuckles wryly. “Not like I’ve got anywhere else to go,” she says. Her mother is going to be so shocked when Olivia shows up on the doorstep in the morning. Olivia was supposed to come back from Ohio with a ring on her finger, not lugging back a broken heart.

“Oh. Right,” Nick says. They lapse into stiff silence, until Nick yawns.

“You don’t have to stay up on my behalf,” Olivia says.

Nick looks over at her. “Nah, I’m fine.”

He pulls out his phone, so Olivia does the same, content to scroll in silence for a while. Until Nick starts laughing quietly at something on his phone. Olivia stretches out and pokes him in the thigh with her toes.

“What’s so funny?”

Nick locks his phone sheepishly. “Nothing.” When Olivia raises her eyebrows at him, he relents. “Kent keeps sending me these tweets about me, they’re kinda funny, I guess.”

Olivia feels her heart skip a beat, but she tries to mask it. She nudges Nick with her foot again. “Tweets about you? I need to see these.”

Nick blushes and tries to hold his phone farther out of Olivia’s reach. Her eyes narrow. That’s as good as a challenge, in her mind. Before she can think better of it, Olivia lunges across the couch for Nick’s phone. Nick jerks back, laughing, but Olivia manages to grab ahold of his wrist.

“Liv,” Nick says, but then they’re wrestling for the phone. Nick’s still laughing. Olivia’s struck, again, at how much bigger Nick is than when they were still in high school. In the scuffle, Olivia ends up halfway in Nick’s lap, but she’s also successfully clutching Nick’s phone in her hand.

Olivia says a quick prayer that Nick is too sentimental to change his phone passcode. (It’s his mom’s birthday.) Nick half-heartedly swipes at the phone as it clicks unlocked.

God bless Karin Blankenburg.

“Liv, c’mon, you don’t—”

Olivia isn’t sure what the next words out of Nick’s mouth are going to be, because she cuts him off by bursting into laughter. She’s swiping quickly through the photo gallery in Nick’s message thread with Kent Johnson. Tweet screenshot, tweet screenshot, random golf photo, another tweet screenshot. They’re mostly innocuous, or vaguely thirsty, or rants about how Nick is underrated by the Blue Jackets organization and how he should get more playing time.

“Liv, what’s so funny?” Nick complains. He sounds put-out, and Olivia glances up from his phone to look at his face. He’s blushing again.

“Nick, like half of these tweets are mine.” From an anonymous Twitter account no one in her life knows about. Nick gapes at her. “I thought I had it locked down, but I guess some have slipped through.” She should check to make sure that account is still private, actually. Nick gapes at her. “What?” Olivia asks. Satisfied, she locks Nick’s phone and hands it back.

“I didn’t know you still paid any attention to me,” Nick says. Olivia hasn’t moved from her position in Nick’s lap.

“A lot of it has been against my will,” Olivia admits. A lot of her tweets were posted under the influence, as well. Nick raises an eyebrow in question. “My friend, Paige, has made it her personal mission to give me a play-by-play of your entire career. Guess I was more invested than I thought.”

Nick’s gaping at Olivia again. She wishes he wouldn’t look at her like that. She shifts uncomfortably back to her end of the couch.

Nick doesn’t say anything.

“Hey, uh, do you mind if I use your shower?” Olivia asks, trying desperately to break the awkward silence she has created. “I’m still a little cold.” In truth, she’s warmed up a bit, but she doesn’t think she could bear to sit in the same room as Nick for another moment.

Nick seems to shake himself. “Oh, yeah, of course.” He points towards his bedroom. “The, uh, bathroom’s through there. There should be a couple extra clean towels and stuff in the closet. Use whatever.”

As Olivia stands to root through her luggage for a change of clothes and her toiletry bag, Nick does the same but slips into the kitchen. Olivia feels a tightness in her chest she didn’t realize was there ease. She sighs.

When Olivia emerges from the shower twenty minutes later, smelling of Nick’s soap and only feeling marginally more like herself, Nick’s still hiding in the kitchen. He’s eating Christmas cookies, and he looks sheepish when he sees Olivia, like he’s a little kid caught sneaking into the cookie jar.

“Are those your mom’s cookies?” Olivia asks. Karin’s Christmas cookies were practically legendary back home in Washington. Olivia has missed them every year since Nick broke up with her.

Nick smiles. “Yeah, she sent me some a few days ago.” Olivia doesn’t bother pointing out that he’ll be home the next day. He holds the Tupperware out to Olivia. “D’you want one?”

“Is that even a question?” Olivia says, snatching the Tupperware. She slides onto the stool next to Nick at the counter, digging for a gingerbread cookie. Nick’s knee nudges hers. “These are the best cookies I’ve ever had. I thought I would die without ever having them again.”

Nick chuckles and gently slides the Tupperware away from Olivia. “That’s a little dramatic.” At Olivia’s skeptical look, he continues, “My mom loves you. She would make you cookies if you asked.”

Olivia takes another bite of her cookie instead of responding. Olivia’s on her fourth cookie when Nick yawns.

“Dude, go to bed,” Olivia tells him. Nick opens his mouth to protest again. “You’re the one driving back to Michigan tomorrow, and I’m obviously keeping you up. Go to bed.”

Nick rolls his eyes but gives in. “Fine, I’ll see you in the morning.”

The door to his bedroom is shut before Olivia can figure out what happened.

Later, Olivia’s most of the way to sleep when Nick’s door creaks open again. Olivia hears Nick’s quiet footsteps as he creeps over to the couch Olivia’s laying on. She cracks her eyes open.

“Sorry,” Nick whispers. “I just wanted an extra blanket.”

There’s four blankets Olivia isn’t using piled at the end of the couch. Nick carefully pulls one off. In the dim light, Olivia watches as he wraps it around his shoulders like a cape. She shuts her eyes again as Nick’s footsteps recede.

“Liv?” Nick whispers. Olivia can barely hear him.

“What, Nick?”

“I thought you hated me,” he says.

“I could never hate you,” Olivia murmurs sleepily. She’s asleep before Nick's door even shuts again.

The next morning, Nick’s up early. Olivia groans and rolls over, burying her face in one of Nick’s throw pillows. She rolls back over when the scent of fresh eggs and toast reaches her nose.

“You made breakfast?” she asks.

“Yeah,” Nick replies, the duh implied. “Come over here, and eat while it’s still hot.”

Olivia reluctantly drags herself off the couch and takes her place at the counter next to Nick. Nick’s knee bumps hers again as he slides a plate towards her.

“No coffee?” Olivia jokes.

“We can stop for Starbucks before we hit the road.”

For some reason, Olivia wasn’t expecting that answer. She can’t come up with a witty response, so she eats her breakfast in silence.

Nick clears both of their plates when they’ve finished, starts the dishwasher, wipes nonexistent crumbs off the countertop. Olivia looks around Nick’s apartment. It’s pretty much spotless, except for the nest of blankets Olivia left on the couch. Nick’s bags are packed and stacked next to Olivia’s by the front door. The apartment’s nice, but it doesn’t feel lived in. Olivia guesses it really isn’t much, since Nick’s been grinding down in Cleveland most of the season.

“Ready?” Nick asks, jolting Olivia out of her thoughts.

“Yeah, sure, just lemme—” grab my bags, is what she was going to say, but Nick’s already hefting his duffel bag over his shoulder and grabbing the handle of Olivia’s suitcase. “Uh, yeah, let’s go.”

Nick leads the way back down to his car. Olivia watches as he tosses their bags in the trunk, then steps over to the passenger door to open it for Olivia. When he slides into the driver’s seat, he tosses his phone to Olivia.

“Order yourself some Starbucks,” he says. “My order’s marked as a favorite, add that in, too.”

Olivia sticks her tongue out at Nick as she unlocks his phone. “Like I would not order you something.”

She taps in her order while Nick drives to the nearest Starbucks. He makes a face when he hands Olivia her drink.

“How do you even drink that? Is there any coffee in there? Also, it’s iced, and it’s December.” Nick takes an appalled drink of his own hot coffee as Olivia sips her own very light, very sweet, and very iced coffee.

“Maybe you’re the one with shitty taste in coffee,” Olivia retorts, zero heat behind her words. When they were still in high school, neither of them drank coffee. Just another thing about Nick that changed without Olivia knowing.

Coffees in hand, they finally get on the road towards Michigan for real. Olivia had slept poorly on Nick’s couch, so she’s looking forward to dozing for a little while. Except, Nick chatters nervously for the first forty-five minutes of the drive. He even drowns out the Christmas playlist (her own) that Olivia cued up on his CarPlay.

Olivia fights off a yawn. “Nick, you can just ask.”

Nick cuts himself off mid-sentence. “I don’t know what you mean.” Olivia gives him a flat look. Nick blushes and stares out the windshield instead of glancing over again. He sighs. “Why’d you and what’s-his-face break up?”

“Austin,” Olivia replies automatically. She notices Nick shake his head at her. She hesitates. “I thought he was going to propose this week,” she admits.

There’s a pause. “I don’t get it.”

“Austin told me that if I wanted a ring, I’d have to move to Ohio,” Olivia says.

“What?” Nick asks. His immediate outrage is a little funny. “Liv, I’m sorry, that’s so shitty.”

Olivia shrugs. “There was a fight about me wanting to stay in Michigan when I graduated a few years ago,” she says. “He never wanted to live in Detroit. I guess I sorta always knew this would happen, and I was just delaying the inevitable.”

Nick clicks his tongue at her. “You love Michigan. Even in high school, you always talked about how you never wanted to leave.”

Olivia can’t believe Nick remembers those conversations they had about the future. “I can’t believe you remember that,” she says.

Nick looks away from the highway for a moment to give Olivia a disbelieving look. “Why wouldn’t I remember that?” he asks.

Olivia doesn’t have a good response to that.

They’re both quiet for another few miles.

“My turn,” Olivia asks, over the sound of The Carpenters playing on the car’s speakers. Nick makes a face, but doesn’t protest. “Why’d you break up with me?”

The question had been plaguing Olivia for years. She had thought she’d finally outrun it, but it followed her all the way to Nick’s car, all the way down I-75 towards Michigan. Maybe if she could get Nick to answer her now, she could finally truly move on. As soon as she could get out of this fucking car, that is.

Nick sighs. “Liv, that’s not fair.”

“How is that ‘not fair’?” Olivia snaps. “You got to ask me a question, now I’m asking you.”

“Because I never liked that asshole you were dating, and I wanted to know what he did to break your heart.”

“You never even met Austin!” Olivia says.

“I didn’t need to,” Nick says. His knuckles are white on the steering wheel. “He got in that fight at the football game, and let you get pushed around.” “Nick, oh my god,” Olivia laughs. “It was a game against Ohio, all kinds of shit gets started at them.”

“He never should have let you fall,” Nick argues.

“Dude, that was like four years ago, how are you still upset about this?”

“He never deserved you,” Nick says.

“You never even met him!” Olivia says again. “And why do you even care so much? You dumped me after graduation.” Nick winces. “Why’d you break up with me, Nick?” she asks again.

“I didn’t want to hold you back,” Nick says,

“Hold me back? From what?” Olivia asks, but Nick talks over her.

“You were going off to Ann Arbor, I wasn’t even going to college.”

Olivia scoffs. “Nick, you moved to Detroit. That’s, like, 45 minutes from Ann Arbor.” Nick shakes his head. “And you ended up at Michigan a few years later, anyway. And you’re literally in the NHL now!”

Nick sighs again. “You’re not getting it, Liv. I worked my ass off to get where I am. I walked on to the team at Michigan. I never should have made it all the way to the NHL, but people took chances on me. I didn’t want you waiting around on some kid who wasn’t even good enough to get a second look from anyone for years. Would you have really wanted to be a senior, dating some stupid sophomore?”

“I don’t know! You never gave me the chance to decide that for myself. I never cared about the hockey, Nick. I just really loved you,” Olivia says quietly. “Wait, we’re literally the same age. Just because you were a sophomore by credits doesn’t somehow make you two years younger than me.” “That’s what you focused on?” Nick asks, but he’s laughing. His face becomes serious again. “I wasn’t ready to start thinking about the future. I was just trying to hold onto hockey for as long as I could back then. I knew everyone expected us to settle down like everyone else in town does, but I couldn’t do that.”

“I did think we would get married one day,” Olivia admits.

“See!” Nick says. “I felt like everyone had this idea, this plan for us, but I wanted to make my own plans. I don’t know, I guess I got scared of the idea of my future being written by someone who wasn’t me.”

Olivia looks out the window, at the dirty snow along the highway. She thinks she gets it. She had this idea of what a perfect life with Nick would have looked like, and when she didn’t get it, she tried to mold Austin into all the gaps in her life that Nick had left behind.

“We were just kids, Nick,” she says softly.

Nick chuckles wryly. “And when have you ever known kids to be good at talking about big things?” he asks.

Olivia has lost track of how long they’ve been driving. She’s not even really sure how far of a drive it is back to home, but Nick seems to know the way. His GPS isn’t even on. They lapse into silence for the duration of another song, then two.

Finally, Nick breaks the silence. “So, now what?”

Olivia huffs out a laugh and scrubs at her face. “Cry. Delete the Pinterest board I had for wedding planning.”

Nick shoots her a sideways look. “People actually do that?”

Olivia laughs again. This time it’s more real. “Dude, I’ve been working on this board since we were in high school.”

Nick doesn’t respond to that, though his cheeks look a little pink. Olivia wonders if she went too far. Nick had just admitted he had been scared off by everyone basically planning their wedding when they were eighteen. She’s about to open her mouth to apologize, to take it back somehow, when Nick speaks again instead.

“We’ve still got a ways ahead of us, I can shut up so you can get some rest if you want.”

Although Olivia had been planning on napping in the car when this little road trip started, Nick’s sentence makes her sit up straighter.

“Nicholas, why would I want you to shut up?”

“I don’t know how you don’t hate me, Liv.”

Olivia could smack him. “Would you stop that? I don’t think it’s possible for anyone to hate you, dumbass.”

“But I broke your heart—”

“When we were eighteen! I was never angry at you, Nick, just confused, really.”

Nick falls silent. He’s quiet for long enough that Olivia does start to doze off.

“I missed you more than I hated you,” she whispers before she falls asleep.

It takes Olivia a moment to reorient herself when she wakes up again. The car has stopped. Nick’s still sitting beside her in the driver’s seat, Christmas playlist still playing over the car’s speakers. Olivia looks blearily out the passenger window.

“This isn’t my house, Nick,” she says warily.

Nick gives her a sheepish look as he pushes open his car door, at the same time the Blankenburgs’ front door opens, and Karin appears.

“My mom wanted to see you,” he says.

Olivia huffs and pushes her car door open, too. Karin is still standing on the front porch. Nick makes his way up the stairs, but his mom is focused on Olivia as she trails after him.

She reaches to pull Olivia into a hug. “Oh, Livvy, it’s so good to see you.”

Olivia stiffens, but hugs Karin back after a moment. “You too, Mrs. B.” She probably hasn’t seen Nick’s mom since before they broke up. “Merry Christmas.”

“Olivia, you know you can call me Karin.”

Olivia is physically incapable of that, actually, but she grins at Karin, anyway.

Nick reappears on the front porch. Olivia hadn’t realized he’d stepped inside, but the door wafts all kinds of delicious smells from inside the Blankenburgs’ house as it swings shut. Olivia’s stomach grumbles. They must have driven through lunch.

“Okay, Mom, you got to say hi,” Nick says, stepping to Olivia’s side. “We should let Liv go, I’m sure she wants to see her own family.”

“Oh, they’re already all inside! So are your brother and sister, we’ve just been waiting on you two!”

“What?” Nick and Olivia ask in unison. They share a bewildered look.

“Well, when you told me you were bringing Livvy home, I just invited her family over for brunch.” Nick and Olivia must still look confused, because she continues, “You know I always make too much food. And right now it’s all getting cold, so c’mon!”

Karin leaves Nick and Olivia on the porch.

Olivia looks sideways at Nick. “D’you think she made cinnamon rolls?” Olivia used to love it when she was allowed to sleep over on Saturday nights (in Katrina’s old room, while Nick slept in his own) and Karin made them fresh cinnamon rolls Sunday morning.

Nick rolls his eyes, but he grins at Olivia. “All you care about is my mother’s cooking, huh?”

He pulls open the door for Olivia, still grinning. Olivia elbows him as she slips through the front door. She follows the smell of food and sound of laughter down the hall to the Blankenburgs’ formal dining room, Nick trailing after her. Every inch of the house is decked out in Karin’s Christmas decorations, and the dining room is no exception. The only thing Olivia is really focused on, though, is the table, piled high with food, and the two empty chairs at one end that are clearly meant for Nick and Olivia. They share another look, but everyone is waiting for them, so they take their seats.

Brunch is great, if a little awkward. Nick’s brother and his girlfriend are home, so are Katrina and her husband. It’s nice to catch up with them, in between Karin grilling Olivia on her life over the last seven years. Karin’s cooking is as good as Olivia remembers it. She eats two cinnamon rolls.

Olivia is in the middle of cuddling Katrina’s little boy when Karin says, “Oh, Livvy, it was such a surprise when Nick told me he was bringing you home. I can’t believe he didn’t tell me you two got back together!”

Nick and Olivia say, “Oh, we’re not—” at the same time Olivia’s mom says, “No, Olivia’s been with Austin, oh, what, six years now?”

An awkward silence falls over the table. Olivia realizes she probably should have told her mom the real reason she was coming home early from Ohio. Nick clears his throat as Olivia pushes her chair back from the table. She hands Katrina her squirming toddler back.

“Mom,” Nick starts, but Olivia cuts him off.

“You know, Mrs. B, thank you so much for having us all over, but I’m pretty tired. Nick’s couch isn’t the most comfortable to sleep on.”

Nick shoves his chair back, too. “I’ll take you back home, Liv. I’ve still got your bags in my car, anyway.”

Karin stands, too. The dining room suddenly feels too small. She gently takes Olivia by the elbow. “Here, Livvy, let me pack up some leftovers for you.” Olivia follows her to the kitchen.

She overhears Katrina hiss, “You made her sleep on the couch?” as they head into the kitchen. Olivia waits obediently while Karin plies her with Tupperwares of leftovers and Christmas cookies.

“It really was nice to see you, Livvy,” Karin whispers. “You know you’re always welcome here, remember.” She looks like she wants to say something else, or maybe hug Olivia, but Olivia’s too busy trying not to drop anything.

“Thanks, Mrs. B,” Olivia whispers back.

Arms full of food, Olivia bypasses the still-awkwardly silent dining room and sneaks down the hallway to where Nick is waiting for her by the front door. He looks upset, still, but his face relaxes when he sees Olivia.

“Geez, did my mom give you enough leftovers?” he asks. He takes a few of the Tupperware containers off the top of the stack. When Olivia doesn’t crack a smile at his teasing, his face morphs back into something like concern. “Liv, you okay?” he asks.

Olivia forces a smile. “Yeah, just ready to go home.”

It starts to snow again on the way back to Olivia’s childhood home. Nick doesn’t need a GPS to get there. He pulls into the driveway and puts his car in park. Neither of them make any move to get out of the car. Nick turns the radio off and turns to face Olivia.

“Liv, you okay?” Nicks asks again.

For the first time since she stood on the freezing curb the night before, Olivia starts to cry.

“No, I don’t know—” She takes a shaky breath. “When we were together, I used to think I had my whole life figured out, then we broke up, and I was so lost. I started dating Austin, and I could finally see a plan for the future again, and I clung to that idea of a perfect happily ever after with him for so long, but it was all just a lie, and now I’m 26 and single again—”

“Hold on,” Nick interrupts, “26 is not that old, Liv, oh my God.” He sounds like he’s about to laugh, which makes Olivia giggle, too.

“I thought I was going to be married to you by now!” she protests.

To her surprise, Nick doesn’t shut down. Instead, he laughs for real. “Liv, if you’d married me, you’d still end up living in Ohio, babe.”

Olivia makes a face. Nick laughs harder. “Okay, but, like—” She doesn’t have a good ending to that sentence. In a desperate attempt to avoid Nick’s knowing gaze, she flings open the passenger door and dashes up the front steps to the door.

She distantly hears Nick swear and throw his car door open as well. He runs up the stairs after her, putting himself between Olivia and the door.

“But what, Liv?” he asks, breathless.

“Nick, I don’t know.” She does know. “I think a part of me always knew Austin wasn’t the right person. I guess, maybe, Ohio wouldn’t be too bad with the right person.”

It’s freezing outside. Nick’s warm breath fans across Olivia’s chilled cheeks.

“And who’s the right person, Liv?” Olivia doesn’t answer, refuses to meet Nick’s eyes. Nick huffs. He captures Olivia’s chin gently between his finger and thumb and tilts her chin up until she has no choice but to look him in the face. “How ‘bout this: do you think we could try again, Olivia?” he asks.

Olivia swallows hard. “I don’t know, Nick—”

Olivia thinks about desperately calling Nick the night before when she needed help. Thinks about the blanket her mom made him years ago still laying on his bed every night. Thinks about brunch at the Blankenburgs’, the inexplicable feeling of home, there with her family and Nick’s.

Thinks about Nick, standing in front of her now.

“They say long-distance can be pretty hard, Blankenburg,” Olivia says.

Nick scoffs, eyes warm. “Who cares what they say?” Nick’s leaning in now. “Please tell me I can kiss you.”

Olivia laughs and winds her arms around Nick’s neck. “I guess I’ll allow it,” she teases.

“Fuck’s sake,” Nick says under his breath. “You guess.” Then he’s kissing Olivia, both hands tight on her hips, fierce and sweet at the same time, years of unspoken words passing between them.

Olivia makes herself pull away. Nick pouts at her. “Knowing our parents when they get together, we probably have a few hours until Mom and Dad come home.” Nick grins, already knowing what Olivia’s going to say next. “Would you like to come inside?”

Nick kisses Olivia again, quick, before dashing off the front porch to his car. Olivia watches as he hurriedly pulls her bags out of the trunk.

“Liv, I thought you’d never ask.”

Olivia watches, a smile on her face, as Nick excitedly makes his way back to her. Long-distance may be hard, but with Nick, Olivia thinks it’ll be worth it. Besides, everyone always says that “home is where the heart is,” right? Olivia thinks home is wherever Nick Blankenburg is. And maybe one day, he’ll sign a contract with Detroit, and they’ll both get to come back home to Michigan.

#cait writes things #nick blankenburg fic #nick blankenburg imagine #columbus blue jackets fic #columbus blue jackets imagine #nhl fic #nhl imagine #nhl fanfiction #hockey fic #hockey imagine #hockey fanfiction

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grillthegridmydear · 3 months ago

Text

✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: Love You Like A Love Song - Part Two :･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ✧

F1 Grid X Reader

The grid reacts to a love song you wrote about them.

Part One

✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧

Pierre Gasly

- Lover - Taylor Swift

The winter break in the F1 yearly calendar was possibly your favourite time of year, any time that you didn't have to miss your boyfriend for days at a time was time you cherished. During the season it was common for you and Pierre to pass each other like ships on the ocean. His early morning starts meant that you were waking up just as he left for the gym and with your days being spent in the studio you wouldn't arrive back to your shared home until long after he had eaten dinner, walked Simba and spent some time on the simulator to prep for that weekends upcoming race.

But winter break meant a few different things, the first being just over two months of freedom between the end of one season in Abu Dhabi and the beginning of testing before Bahrain kicked off the next. The second being that you and Pierre would spend a week visiting both of your families to spend some time with them before the two of you holed yourselves up in Strasbourg for the Christmas period, your apartment there playing host to the most wonderful time of year until New Years called you both down to Monaco for the annual celebration with your friends.

But tonight was more important than thoughts of the upcoming season, Christmas Eve was here and after you both got back from touring the Christmas market with Simba, the front door was locked and the curtains mostly drawn, the fireplace lit and the croon of old records on your player sealed you all inside your apartment for the night, wrapping you up in your own little snow globe. It was a picture perfect scene, you on the couch with Simba curled up in your lap, Pierre grabbing the wine and pasta that you were eating for dinner, with Miracle on 34th Street playing on the TV, snow falling past the window.

Every Christmas followed this routine since you and Pierre first celebrated the holiday together as a couple, and you couldn't picture a better way to spend it.

But of all of the traditions you followed there was one that seemed the most special, as a child Christmas gifts were locked away never to be opened until the morning, but being adults who made their own rules, you two always sat under the tree on the evening of the 24th and opened your gifts for each other. This year you could feel yourself on the edge of your seat because of the wrapped record that sat at the bottom of his pile, a surprise that you had been working on for about a month.

"qu'est-ce que c'est?" his goofy smile made you giggle as he got to the last gift in his little stack, a stack which had also contained a new watch, a silly t shirt with a photo of him and Charles when they were kids in their little karting suits (a matching one sat in a gift bag with the Monegasque's name on it) and a Cartier chain that now sat in its rightful place on his neck. The flat square was wrapped immaculately in the same gold and silver paper as his other gifts but once the paper was ripped off Pierre was met with a simple brown cardboard record sleeve, completely blank besides a polaroid that had been glued to the front, it was from your first Christmas together, taken in that very apartment when it was empty bar the Christmas tree and sofa you were currently sat on. One word decorated the bottom border of the photograph "Lover" written in your familiar handwriting.

Your own smile only grew when he immediately abandoned all his other gifts to swap out the current song for his mystery gift. Smooth guitars filled the room as he pulled you up to dance with him, your own voice echoing through the room as you settled into a slow sway.

Can I go where you go? Can we always be this close forever and ever? And ah, take me out, and take me home (forever and ever) You're my, my, my, my Lover

The songs end was met with the muffled crackle of the needle but you couldn't pull your eyes away from his. without breaking away from your gaze Pierre pulled a small box from his pocket and knelt on the spot. Love and admiration never leaving his eyes.

Your Lover, Forever.

✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:

Charles Leclerc

- Feels like This - Maisie Peters

There were a select few honours that you had managed to have in your life this far, the first being the music you were able to give to the world. Since you were old enough to babble you held a tune and the passion you had for music translated to the songs you wrote and shared with the world as your career.

The second being the honour you had to be the long time girlfriend of the most amazing man you had ever known. Charles met you when you were traveling in Italy a few years ago as a well deserved treat to yourself after finishing university. A coffee shop in Maranello played host to your meet cute where you sat in a cosy corner next to the most beautiful piano, when the owner saw you eyeing the instrument she insisted that you play something, and among the crowd of café patrons stood a transfixed Charles Leclerc. He was still in his first year of racing with Ferrari at the time, and once you finished playing a song that you had written the patrons applauded while he worked up the courage to ask you for your name, and eventually your number. The relationship that followed was nothing short of a fairy tale and as his career in formula one grew so did yours in music, both of you growing into notorious and respected individuals in your respective fields.

All this to say that your third and most recent honour came in the form of a request 6 months ago. It was inevitable that Charles brother Lorenzo would eventually propose to his long time love Charlotte but when the day finally came it was magical. This exciting chapter in their lives came with a very special request from the future groom himself, as he pulled you to the side at the family dinner held to celebrate the upcoming nuptials and explained that he wanted to surprise Charlotte with a song for their first dance as husband and wife, and he wanted you (renowned artist and his brother's girlfriend) to write and perform it.

Which led you to tonight, mere hours before the wedding, where you were sat at the piano in the ballroom of the beautiful historic mansion in the Italian countryside that would play host to the reception the following day. You were so engrossed in your secret rehearsal that the footsteps of your love went unheard until you felt him sit with you, the both of you sharing the piano stool. Charles made a successful distraction as your fingers left the keys and you turned to look at him, joy dancing in his eyes as he took you in, sat in your happy place.

"So this is what you have been working on? It sounds beautiful."

Charles was just as much in the dark about your song as the rest of the family, the only one who had heard the song being Lorenzo when you sent a voice note to him three weeks ago for final approval, the phone call you received minutes later held his glowing admiration and you could almost swear his voice was heavy with emotion as he thanked you what must have been a hundred times, citing the songs perfection.

"Enzo asked me to write it, its his gift to Charlotte for tomorrow, their first dance."

You fiddled with the keys absentmindedly before launching into the full song, this time with the vocals which echoed through the empty room, the world coming to a standstill as Charles watched you with eyes full of love.

Who cares about star signs? I'm hardwired to be with you You're like a sunrise and I'm scared that I'll never get enough of you Nobody called it a starfall Come out the blue I'm all butterflies I'm sky-high for you When it feels like this, like a light came on And you look at me like I'm all you want I got everything at my fingertips How can I resist when it feels like this?

The final notes echoed through the room as you met Charles' gaze for his approval, you were met with his hazel gaze staring into your soul.

"How do you do it?" He whispers in awe.

"I write them about you."

✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:

Carlos Sainz

- A Thousand Years - Christina Perri

You and Carlos never fought, in the three years that you have been lucky to love him it had never happened.

You were convinced that you were soulmates, twin flames that slotted together like puzzle pieces, your personalities fit in a way that you had never seen before, not in the love your own parents shared, not in the movies you grew up watching or the books you read, not even in the love you saw everyday between strangers on the streets that you would never meet again. Since the day you met Carlos Sainz you were convinced that he was the answer to the wishes that the little girl inside you once made on stars looking to find a handsome prince to love her forever.

Couples fight, it was normal, healthy even. The words bounced around your head, hitting the walls of your empty home in a never ending loop. Couples fight, but you never did.

Which is why you were so frazzled, why you sat in a trance in your living room, alone in your big empty house while your fiancé was on the other side of the world. Because you and Carlos never fought, until you did.

The argument became insignificant the second it ended, you couldn't even remember what it was about or what had started it in the first place, but it was enough to leave you in tears as Carlos picked up his keys and left two days before he was set to leave for Singapore. Your phone lay on the table in front of you, screen dark and notification bar empty. He had yet to reach out, no calls or texts since he walked out the day before, but neither had you. You didn't know what to say, and it wasn't for lack of trying, but every time your finger hovered over his contact you froze, what if he didn't want to speak to you? The Singapore Grand Prix was a difficult race in its essence, it was held at night in blistering heat and it was dangerous if the driver couldn't command their full focus, so the idea of distracting him before he raced left a pit in your stomach.

You were brought out of your thoughts when your phone finally lit up, the screen coming to life with a feint buzz, heart leaping into your throat you scrambled to open it, hoping for a message from him, but it was instead from Lando, one of Carlos' closest friends on the grid. His message was simple, a brief 'saw this on twitter' followed by a video.

Opening the attachment you were met with an edit, clearly made by a fan, of moments that the media and other fans had caught in your relationship. Clips and photos from the last three years of you and Carlos strung together in a video that captured the story of you both, from early days to the many races that you were in attendance for, snippets from interviews where the other was mentioned to the photo that had announced your engagement to the world. Every public moment of your love captured in a two minute video that had you smiling and filled with warmth.

The song took three days from start to finish, your extensive training in as many instruments as you could get your hands on let you compose the piece in record time, and the final product sat nestled in your phone as you boarded the flight to Singapore, the sixteen hour flight let you catch up on the sleep you had lost and when you landed on Sunday evening you were an hour away from the start of the race, you wouldn't make it to the track before Carlos was in the car but the audio file was sent as you settled into a taxi.

When you reached the paddock the race was well underway and a staff member from Ferrari waited at the gates with your pass. There were 10 laps to go when you finally made it to the garage, Alexandra waving you over as you both watched your boys in the final stint of the race, when the checker flag waved to signal the end of the race you accompanied the rest of the crew out to the parc ferme barriers, Max, George and Lando settled into their podium spaces and between them you could see him.

Your eyes met, and the world stopped.

As he jogged over the crew around you began their congratulations for his P4 finish, but your eyes never left his, not until he reached you and his lips crashed onto your own. The frozen world around you began to speed up, lights brighter and sounds louder as you poured you entire being into the kiss.

"mi para siempre" were the words that he mumbled, breaking the kiss with your foreheads pressed together like if you were to separate the world would end.

Couples fight, you and Carlos fought, once, and never again.

And all along I believed I would find you Time has brought your heart to me I have loved you for a thousand years I'll love you for a thousand more

✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:

Daniel Riccardo

- Enchanted - Taylor Swift

It was official, you had finally lost your mind.

"I hope you guys are enjoying the show tonight" you spoke into the mic as the stadium crowd cried out in deafening screams, your usual tour costume had been swapped out for the most gorgeous purple gown of your dreams, this entire section of the show was brand new to debut tonight and close out your Sydney show. A new song that had never been heard by the crowd, or by the man who stood with your friends and family in the VIP tent.

You and Daniel had been friends for as long as either of you could remember. Attached by the hip all your lives you were best friends, well, you were his best friend, you were madly in love with him, which was inconvenient.

As the crowd died down you continued "It's so special to be back in Australia, this has been a pretty epic welcome back to my home so thank you all for coming out tonight." You could feel the love pouring back at you from the crowd, which was giving you courage to do what you were about to do, if this whole thing blew up in your face like fireworks then at least you knew that they would have a new song.

"So I have this song, its a new song that I wrote for my next album but I think that tonight is the perfect night to sing it to you all for the first time." Your eyes bounced between the floor and the section of seats to the left of the stage, where you knew Daniel was watching.

Yep, you had finally gone insane.

"This song was written with someone really special to me in mind, He is someone I have known all my life, and he just so happens to be the person I love most in the world, so I hope you enjoy."

The band played the intro to the song, guitars ringing through the venue which riled the crowd up once again into cheers, there was no going back now.

There I was again tonight Forcing laughter, faking smiles Same old tired, lonely place Walls of insincerity, shifting eyes and vacancy Vanished when I saw your face All I can say is, it was enchanting to meet you

Thousands of lights began to erupt around the stadium, looking like the fireflies that you and Danny used to chase in the summer. This song contained your entire being, all of your feelings, memories, and dreams condensed into six minutes. Years of neighbouring desks in school, sneaking out to watch the stars, lounging on the sofa in his garage while he fiddled with his kart. It spanned all the cities that you followed him to, watching him race, every victory and every loss, different formula categories and varying teams over the years as he made a name for himself. All the years of talent shows and sleepless nights on porches with your guitar and your notebook, to the sold out shows that led you to tonight. Every single moment shared with him.

This is me praying that This was the very first page Not where the story line ends My thoughts will echo your name, until I see you again These are the words I held back, as I was leaving too soon I was enchanted to meet you

The consequences of your extremely public declaration of your feelings were glaringly obvious, it could all go horribly wrong. You knew that Daniel wouldn't exit your life if he didn't feel the same, but no matter the outcome, either he returned your feelings or you just publicly humiliated yourself on stage and you weren't entirely sure that you could live with the rejection that you would face if he didn't love you the way you wanted to be loved by him.

Daniel Riccardo held a tight grasp on your heart and he had the power to shatter it into a million pieces.

This night is sparkling, don't you let it go I'm wonderstruck, blushing all the way home I'll spend forever wondering if you knew This night is flawless, don't you let it go I'm wonderstruck, dancing around all alone I'll spend forever wondering if you knew I was enchanted to meet you Please don't be in love with someone else Please don't have somebody waiting on you

Your voice rang out to a final deafening cheer from the crowd as the lights went dark. The show was over, and now you had to face the music.

As the venue began to empty you paced the length of the backstage area, Daniel always met you back stage after a show if he was in attendance, and as the minutes ticked by and the tulle of your dress brushed the floor with every step dread started to seep into you.

Maybe you made a mistake.

Before you could wish for the earth to swallow you whole pounding footsteps came to a sudden halt behind you. When you turned to see him he looked out of breath, like he ran to get there. His expression was unreadable and a final strike of dread sent a shiver down your spine.

This was a mistake.

Before you could say anything, before you could fumble for the words to explain yourself, make up any excuse to save your friendship from the catastrophic end that your mind was envisioning he marched up to meet you.

The kiss was unexpected, you would have thought you were dreaming but even in your dreams, Daniel never kissed you like that. It lasted what felt like forever and as you both eventually came up for air the unreadable look in his eyes suddenly became glaringly clear.

"I'm not in love with anyone but you."

✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:

Part two as promised, This one was a lot of fun to write so I hope you enjoy.

✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:

#f1 x reader #formula 1 #charles leclerc #charles leclerc x reader #charles leclerc x you #charles leclerc fanfic #pierre gasly #pierre gasly x reader #carlos sainz #carlos sainz x reader #daniel ricciardo #daniel riccardo x reader #Spotify

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w2soneshots · 8 months ago

Text

Guernsey -W2S

words: 0.8k+

warnings: none.

summary: you meet Harry’s parents for the first time.

notes: I finally wrote something I like and it wasn’t a request🫢. I hope you enjoy lovelys🫶🏼.

Liked by wroetoshaw and 501,348 others

y/username: umm hey😉

Tagged: @faithloisak @eatsides

-comments-

faithloisak: beautiful beautiful girl

-> y/username: 💋💋

y/nfanpage21: the last pic!!🤭

eatsides: supportive queen🍗❤️

user15327094: OMFG IS THAT W2S??

user89130243: herb what r u doin here

Me and Harry have been together for almost five months now. We met through instagram, he followed me, liked my posts, then finally sent me a message. Since then we've been inseparable, texting every day and it feels like I practically live in his apartment since he doesn't want me to leave, saying “no… don’t go, just one more night?” Along with his best puppy dog eyes. I get along great with Harry's friends, especially Tobi since he was so welcoming. After meeting Faith at Tobi's birthday party we became quite close and have had many great conversations. I feel as though I can always go to her if I need someone to speak to or if I just need some advice.

Today Harry's talking me to Guernsey to meet his family for the first time. We woke up early and threw on a comfy outfit then headed to the airport. When we arrived we went through security and waited around for a little while before actually getting onto the plane. After just over an hour we were landing in Guernsey.

y/username just posted a new story!

"Oh my god, this place is fucking beautiful." I stared out the plane window in awe of the island. Harry chuckled at my giddiness. I'm so excited to meet his family, unfortunately Rosie is at uni and Josh is on holiday so ill have to wait a little longer to meet them but ill get to see his parents. He's met mine multiple times but our schedules have never been clear enough to spend a weekend here, so when we got the chance we immediately booked the flights.

Once we'd collected our bags and were making our way out of the airport we spotted Harry's dad stood leaning against his car. I took a deep breath. "You have nothing to worry about. They're gonna love you." Harry whispered into my ear. I looked up at him "ok let's go."

"Hello, nice to finally meet you. I'm Harry's dad but you can call me Adrian." He spoke in a very cheery voice. My nerves instantly calmed. "Hi, I'm y/n." I introduced myself. "Yes I know. Harry don't stop talking about you." He chuckled. I looked over to Harry, his face was bright red and he'd gotten all embarrassed. "Does he now?" I teased him. Adrian laughed once again "well we better get going, Sue is desperate to meet you."

When we arrived outside of Harry's home my jaw dropped, it's practically a mansion. We hopped out of the car, Adrian and Harry grabbed our bags and I headed inside to introduce myself to his mum. Harry told me that the door was unlocked so I pressed down the handle and pushed it open. I was immediately bombarded by Herb, who seemed very excited to see me. I'd spent quite a lot of time with the dog since Harry had brought him with him back to London a few times.

"Hello! Come on in." Harry's mum Sue pulled me into a hug. I smiled "It's so nice to meet you." She walked me through into the kitchen "Are you hungry? I just made lunch." My eyes lit up "I'm starving and that smells amazing!" She smiled "great." Harry burst into the room seconds later and came to stand next to me. "You hungry Harry?" His mum asked. Harry nodded. "Alright, food will be ready in ten. Why don't you to go and get settled in." Harry gave me a quick toor of the house then showed me to his room. "See I told you they'd love you."

After lunch Harry wanted to take me on a walk to show me one of his favourite places on the island. So we put on our coats and shoes then he put a harness on Herb. "Come on let's go, Herbert!" Harry shouted and seconds later Herb came running towards us. I opened the door. "So where are we going?" I asked as we walked down the street. "My favourite beach." He replied.

"Wow, I can't believe you grew up somewhere like this." I admired the waves as Herb played in the sand. "I didn't appreciate it enough when I lived here, but now that I don't come here as often I realised how much I miss it," Harry said without breaking eye contact with the view. I placed my head on his shoulder and let out a breath. "I love you." "I love you too Haz."

y/username

Liked by faithloisak and 702,539 others

y/username: weekend in paradise💗

Tagged: @wroetoshaw

-comments-

taliamar: pink is your colour🌸

-> y/username: 🤗

wroetoshaw: ❤️🐶

y/nfanpage21: omg there so cute together!

user80163294: she actually posted harry🙊

user28945110: she met the fam they're definitely serious

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kay-elle-cee · 3 months ago

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@jilytoberfest 31 Prompts: Day 4 || 641 Words || Read on Ao3 —

4 October 1985

Harry bounces between his parents, one hand clasped in each of theirs as they walk through the streets of Hogsmeade. “Can we go to Honeydukes after lunch?” he asks eagerly, grinning a gap-toothed smile.

“How else would we round out our Hogsmeade trip?” James asks, lifting his arm up a bit and causing Harry to kick and giggle.

“We should stock up on Peppermint Quills for the holidays,” Lily grins down at him, stepping through the door to the Three Broomsticks that James holds open for them.

“Happy birthday!” Harry shouts into the room, and Lily and James both look up to where Minerva McGonagall sits at a booth not too far from the entrance. A serene smile spreads across her face as the small family makes its way towards her.

“Thank you, Harry,” she nods, accepting the hug he offers her as his parents echo his sentiments before sliding into the booth across from her.

“I didn’t see many students milling around,” Lily muses, craning her head to look out the window. “Is it not a Hogsmeade weekend?”

“The first Hogsmeade trip for students is next weekend.”

“Well thank you for stepping out of the castle to meet us,” James says with a smile. “You know how much I hate to cause you trouble.”

This earns a laugh from the older woman, whose brows raise in interest as James slides a large envelope across the table.

“I know I could’ve owled it, but there’s something more satisfying about handing it to you directly.” He watches as she opens it and scans the first page. “I’ve been focusing on the intersection between Transfiguration and Charms theory the last few years, and would love to discuss it with you. Maybe Filius, too, if you think there’s enough merit there.”

“We brought a real present for you, too!” Harry chimes in, pushing a small, wrapped box across the table.

“My, well…” Minerva’s eyes flit between the box and the research in her hand, before settling on the small boy in front of her. “Thank you for the gift. All of you,” she adds, gaze wandering up to the parents. It lingers there, shifting from Lily to James and back again, and something in her eyes softens as she looks at them—two of her pupils, years out of school, with a horrible war behind them and a happy family.

“The thesis on this looks good, Potter,” she acknowledges, shaking the parchment and herself out of her nostalgic stupor. “Term is in full swing right now and I want to give this the proper attention. I likely won’t get to it until the students start revising for end-of-term exams—perhaps we can discuss it in detail around the holidays once I’ve had a chance to read?”

James nods. “Of course, at your pace.”

“We’d love to have you over to the cottage for some Christmas tea again,” Lily invites, raking her fingers through Harry’s hair as he fidgets in his seat.

“I’d like that,” Minerva nods, eyes darting down to the young boy. “Besides, I imagine I should be enjoying all my winter breaks while I can. With this one starting Hogwarts in a few years, I’m sure I’ll be needed at the castle over the holidays to undo his messes, if he’s anything like his father.”

A warm grin breaks out on Lily’s face as she looks down at Harry. “He’s not that much of a troublemaker. I like to think there’s a good bit of me in there.” She looks across at her old professor as her hands slip to cover Harry’s ears. “Though we do have to contend with the Sirius influence,” she adds in an exaggerated whisper.

This earns a laugh from both Minerva and James as Madame Rosmerta sweeps up to the table to ask for their order, and the birthday lunch truly begins.

#a life with you #jily #jple #jilytober #jilytober2024 #jilytoberfest2024 #james potter #lily evans

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onceuponaoneshotfanfic · 1 year ago

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Playing Pretend (Part 2)

Drinks before dinner get uncomfortable- and exciting- quickly.

Roy Kent x Reader

2.1k words

Warnings: Language, alcohol, a smidge of angst because that's what happens when your sister marries your ex

Series Masterlist

“I thought the big fancy dinner was tomorrow,” Roy mumbled as he pulled a dress shirt out of his suitcase and held it up to check for wrinkles.

After settling into the room you’d be sharing for the weekend, the two of you had spent about an hour laying on the bed next to each other and reading the books you’d each brought before you informed him that it was time to get ready for dinner.

“Oh, it is,” you agreed, pulling out a dress from your own luggage. “Tonight’s just family. My parents and sisters, Jim’s parents.” You paused, looking up at Roy. “You, apparently.”

Roy rolled his eyes and tugged off the Richmond sweater he’d worn on the drive. You blushed, averting your eyes from his wooly chest to focus on the dress in your hands. “Fucking rich people,” he muttered.

A scoff escaped your lips. “Roy, you’re rich,” you reminded him. “You drive a car that costs more than I make in a year.”

“Hey, you told me you like that car.” He buttoned up his shirt and posed. “How do I look?”

You couldn’t help but melt a little as you looked at him in his black dress shirt and equally black jeans. “Perfect.” Realizing you’d been staring for a moment too long, you tightened your grip on your dress. “Be right back.” You stepped into the bathroom attached to the room you’d be sharing with Roy- something you tried not to think too hard about- and changed into the dress. Frustration crossed your mind when you realized you couldn’t quite reach the zipper. “Roy!” you called.

“What?” came his gruff voice.

You poked your head back into the bedroom. “Can you help me with the zipper?”

An expression you couldn’t quite read crossed his face. “Can’t you, I dunno, go ask your mum or your sister to help you?”

“Come on, Roy.” You rolled your eyes. “You’re supposed to be my boyfriend. This is a boyfriend job. How would it look if I go ask my mum to help me with my dress when you’re right there?”

“Fine, fine.” He crossed the room and spun you around, so your back was to him. You were sure you were imagining the shaky breath he let out and the trembling you felt as he slowly zipped up your dress. Roy had no reason to be nervous; you were just the silly kid who used to beg him to play Barbies with you and his sister.

But still, the domesticity of the moment made your heart sing a little.

“Thank you,” you hummed. You slipped on your shoes and gave a little spin. “Now, how do I look?”

His face went all soft, your favorite look in the world. “Perfect.” He held out his hand. “Ready?”

With a deep breath, you took his hand, not sure if you were more anxious about the first event of the weekend or the simple act of holding Roy Kent’s hand. Maybe a bit of both.

The walk to the drawing room felt weirdly familiar; you’d been here many times with Jim, for weddings and anniversaries and birthdays and holidays and just-for-fun. A sad part of you wondered how many times Lauren had been here. An even sadder part of you realized that she was probably sleeping in the same room you used to sleep in.

As if he could feel the sudden pang in your heart, Roy gave your hand a squeeze.

“I’m probably going to repeat myself all fucking weekend,” he whispered, “but I’m right here. I’ve got you. Don’t you fucking forget that.”

Some of the sharp pain in your chest evaporated as you squeezed back. “I know, Roy.”

“Roy! Darling!”

As soon as you stepped into the drawing room, you mother made a beeline for the two of you, throwing her arms around Roy. Your dad followed behind, eyebrows slightly raised as he gave you a small hug and planted a kiss on your cheek.

“Hello,” Roy said, genuine cheer in his voice as your mother released him. He shook your dad’s hand warmly. “Hope I’m not intruding on the weekend.”

Your mum shook her head “Absolutely not. You’re always welcome with us, you know that, dear. Especially-” She shot you a look. “-if what we hear about you and our little duckling is true?”

Roy wrapped an arm around your shoulder and pulled you close to himself. “Guilty, I’m afraid.”

“Well, that’s grand,” you dad assured him. “Always had a good feeling about the two of you.” He gestured towards the room. “Come on in, we’re doing the whole cocktails before dinner thing.” Your dad wrinkled his nose at you; even when you dated Jim, he was always uncomfortable with how posh Jim’s family was. However, he never said no to the chance to drink good alcohol, as evidenced by the glass in his hand.

Roy guided you to one of the elegant couches, tenderly placing a hand on your knee once you were seated beside him. Despite your agony surrounding this weekend, part of you hoped it would never end, if only so you could always have all this attention and affection from Roy.

As if determined to ruin any bit of happiness you got this dreadful weekend, your sister and Jim appeared, drinks in hand. Lauren had that plastic smile you knew she’d be wearing for the next three days.

“You two get that alone time?” she teased, shooting you a mocking wink.

You just smiled and leaned closer to Roy, treating him like the lifesaver he was. He planted a soft kiss in your hair that sent a shiver down your spine.

“Gentlemen don’t kiss and tell, Lauren,” he hummed, raising those thick eyebrows that you loved.

“Fathers prefer no kissing,” your dad chimed in with a dry chuckle. “But I can make an exception for Roy.”

Roy’s smile widened. “Appreciate it,” he laughed. He loved the way your dad treated him; even when you dated Jim, your dad treated Roy like a son. His sister had even confided in him that it was a point of contention in your relationship, what with your dad never being as warm with Jim.

Gripping his drink rather tightly, Jim gestured between the two of you. “Alright, so I got interrupted earlier. How’d this happen?”

Shit. You’d forgotten to get your story straight with Roy. The two of you had spent the whole drive up chatting about childhood memories, movies you wanted to show each other, stories from work, and even one enthusiastic duet of You Belong With Me when it came on the road trip playlist you’d had blasting from your phone. It hadn’t occurred to you to make sure the two of you knew what to say when everyone inevitably wanted to know about your “relationship”.

You prayed only Roy could see the panic in your eyes as you looked up at him. “D’you want to tell the story?” you offered.

He didn’t skip a beat. “Well, about what, two months ago, babe?” He looked down at you, and you quickly nodded in agreement. “We were hanging out, and my sister had canceled so it was just us. I took over kebabs, and we were watching His Girl Friday, this one’s favorite.”

Everything he’d said so far was true; the three of you were supposed to hang out, but Roy’s sister had backed out at the last second, so Roy came over anyway. And he’d claimed not to care what movie you watched, so you put on an old Cary Grant movie that you’d seen a million times (and Roy had been forced to watch about half a million times). It had been a perfect night, sitting next to Roy while Cary Grant and Rosalind Russell danced around their feelings before finally coming together.

Roy continued, “And I looked over and saw just how absolutely beautiful she looked, with the light from the television glowing on her face and that dreamy expression she gets when she watches old movies.” He looked down, all bashfulness, before turning his gaze to you. You were amazed by his acting. “And I just fucking asked if I could kiss her, and she said yes. So, I leaned over and…”

It was the kiss you’d waited your whole life for. His hand came up to tenderly lift your chin, tilting your face to his. His barely parted lips were soft, gentle, his beard just barely tickling your skin. Every daydream you’d ever had about Roy Kent was nothing compared to the tiny kiss that ended far too soon.

Bashfulness reappeared on Roy’s face as he cleared his throat, remembering all the eyes on the two of you. “Sorry about that,” he chuckled. “We’re still in that lovey-dovey phase where we can’t keep our hands off each other and make everyone around us want to get violently ill.” His eyes focused icily on Jim. “You remember that, don’t you Jim?

Jim nearly choked on his drink.

“With Lauren,” Roy clarified, nodding towards your sister, whose face was twisted in annoyance. “How’d you two kids meet anyway?”

“Why don’t I get you a drink, Roy?” Jim offered quickly, his face void of all color. “Beer?”

Roy’s hand was back on your knee, gripping it a bit tighter now. “Whiskey. Neat.” He turned to you, his face softening. “And you?”

Jim shook his head. “I remember,” he assured you, shoving his own drink into Lauren’s hand and heading to the small bar off to one side of the room, the bar you remembered experimenting behind with Jim and his cousins once the older folks had gone to bed. You could still taste the disgusting combinations Jim had concocted for you to try. You could still hear the laughter that had filled the room as everyone took shots. You could still feel the sloppy kisses that tasted of expensive alcohol.

Sensing the tension oozing off of you, your parents excused themselves to go talk to Jim’s parents; they didn’t exactly need introductions, considering how many times they’d met while you were dating Jim.

Always perfect in her timing, your older sister, Jen, strolled into the room, shaking you out of your wistful reminiscing. She lit up when she saw the two of you and made a beeline for you, her husband, Paul, in tow.

“Well, well, well, what have we here? And there? And every-fucking-where?” she teased.

Roy laughed and stood, wrapping his arms around your older sister. “Hello, Jenny.” He turned his attention to your brother-in-law. “Paul, how the hell are you man?”

Paul shook Roy’s hand enthusiastically, the way he always did. “Great. Clearly you’re doing quite well yourself.” He leaned over and kissed your cheek. “I owe your dad forty quid. I had figured the two of you’d be dancing around this thing for the rest of your lives.”

“Paul!” you gasped, smacking your brother-in-law’s arm playfully. Behind closed doors, he loved to tease you about your painfully obvious attraction to Roy.

“I knew you two’d get together eventually,” Jen bragged, giving you a squeeze before you resumed your seats. “I mean, come on, we all could see the way you look at each other. Someone was bound to crack eventually.”

You let out a weak chuckle and leaned close to Roy, whose arm rested casually around your shoulders. Lauren watched you, eyes narrowed, as Jim returned. His hand shook slightly as he handed you your usual drink, the one he’d heard you order a million times. He handed Roy his whiskey and returned obediently to Lauren’s side, taking his own glass from her hand and planting a kiss on her cheek.

“We better go make sure things are ready for dinner,” Lauren hummed, grabbing Jim’s hand and pulling him out of the drawing room. You couldn’t help but notice Jim’s gaze lingering on you; neither could Roy, whose arm tightened around you.

Paul let out a low whistle. “This is going to be a tense weekend,” he muttered, raising his eyebrows at the two of you. He turned to Jen. “We should start taking bets about when this one and Jim come to blows, eh?”

Roy let out a dry chuckle and sipped his drink, relaxing slightly. “We wouldn’t want me making Lauren a widow before she’s even married, would we?”

“Play nice,” you warned him playfully, poking his nose. Fake-dating Roy felt deliciously natural. At least, when Jim and Lauren weren’t around.

“Yes, dear.” Roy’s voice was light and teasing. He leaned forward and kissed your lips again, a smidge deeper this time. The taste of his whiskey sent your head spinning. “Whatever you say.”

#roy kent playing pretend #he's here he's there he's every fucking where #roy kent #roy kent x reader #roy kent fanfiction #roy kent fanfic #roy kent fic #roy kent fluff #ted lasso #ted lasso fanfic #ted lasso fic #ted lasso fluff

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magics-neptunes-things · 1 year ago

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BabySister (2)

It been asked, it's here ladies and gentlemen!

I didn't realize that there is so much people asking for Leila's content but here it is!

You can find the requests here and here and here and here too

It's the part 2 of "Babysister*t that you can find here :) Please enjoy!

TW : Jealousy

______________________________________________________________

Despite the fact that your sister is aware of your relationship with Leila, you both decided not to make an official annoucement for now. Your friends are starting to be nicely made aware, but you’ve never been for the big announcements and you just talk about it to people who are interested in you and your personal life.

Shortly after the revelation, Jenni had to go back home. Two days later, it was Leila who had to return to Manchester and you are back alone in Barcelona. Even if you have friends and family here, their departures aren't easy. Especially Leila’s, of course. Seeing her go through airport security after one last long hug will probably break your heart every time.

Your week then went on, between work, a few drinks with your friends and the routine that settled back after the holidays. You regularly called Jenni during the week and every night you call Leila, but it’s clearly not enough compared to being able to see them every day while they’re in Barcelona.

"Is everything okay?" Leila asks you Friday night, having noticed your morale at half-mast.

"Yes" you answer simply by shrugging your shoulders.

Leila is preparing herself something to eat, you see her stop to look more closely at the screen of the phone. It's true that you are less local than usual, something that was obviously quickly noticed by Leila. She knows you well.

"I can tell when you’re lying, you know?"

You sigh softly, letting yourself go on your back on your bed. Of course she can.

"I’m fine. I miss you, that’s all"

"I miss you too, Cariño. What are you planning for your weekend?"

"Tomorrow we go out for a drink with my colleagues probably. And Sunday afternoon I watch my girlfriend play on TV"

"I like the second part, but the first? Will there be Aida?"

You roll your eyes when you hear her. You don’t understand why Leila reacts every time she hears that name, you already have had a few comments about her from your coffee with Jenni. All turned around a jealousy that absolutely doesn't deserve to exist.

"She wasn’t sure she could come" so you answer honestly.

"Perfect. Let her continue like this"

********

The following weekend is a little more glorious, since you have the opportunity to fly to Manchester to see Leila play. With Manchester City at home, you can enjoy Leila’s apartment while she’s at training before joining her at the stadium to be on time for the game. You’re happy to see her start the game, just like Laia Aleixandri, your compatriot.

The match ends with a draw and you quickly notice the disappointed look of Leila. She likes to win when you come to see her, probably to add pride.

"You were perfect" you smile at her when she comes up to you after the game.

"We didn't win" Leila objects but you smile tenderly while shrugging her shoulders.

"Not everyone can be as perfect as you."

An amused smile appears on her face when hearing you and you know that her morale isn't as low as you might have feared.

"The girls want to go out tonight, you want us to go too?"

You willingly accept, freeing Leila so that she can go to take a shower and warm up a little. You have time to go home for a while before going out again and you enjoy having her only for you for a few hours. You can imagine that once in the evening, things will be a little less easy.

You spend a little more time than usual in the bathroom getting ready, wishing to impress Leila. Now that your sister knows about you two, you’re a little less afraid of getting caught by someone and ending up on social media. And you can say just by seeing Leila’s look when you come out that it’s successful.

"Do you like it?" you ask Leila, looking down at your outfit.

"You are to die for" Leila assures you, eyes wide open.

You can't hold a small smile and you gladly accept her hug even if her hands are a little wandering on your body.

"Be good, we have to go" you remind her by laying a kiss on her cheek.

Despite a grunt of protest, Leila finally lets you go and drags you to the bottom of her building. Both planning to drink, you preferred to use an Uber rather than taking risks on your way back home. Maybe one of Leila’s teammates can take you home if she doesn’t drink, but you’ll have plenty of time to check in later.

Most of Leila’s teammates are already at the bar when you get there, your hand in Leila’s. You greet them or you greet them again, even if you are easier to communicate with those who speak Spanish. Your English is great actually and that's a good thing.

The evening goes well and you have a good time, dancing or just chatting and talking with the girls. After a long time of dancing on the dance floor, you went back to sit with Leila and other girls.

"I’m going to the bathroom, I’m coming back" Leila whispers in your ear before getting up.

You nod, smiling as you feel her letting a kiss on your neck before shifting your attention to your glass, to see that it's empty. Given the heat, you don't hesitate long before getting up to go get another one.

You take the time to ask those around you if they want something and you refuse the proposal of Laia who asks you nicely if you want her to accompany you, despite the arms of her boyfriend passed possessively around her.

The crowd is dense and you have to go around the dance floor to reach the bar. But you finally get there, leaning on the corner of the bar waiting patiently for someone to come and serve you. There are a lot of people so it takes time, but you wait while looking at your phone. When you feel a hand on your shoulder you turn around smiling, expecting to see Leila. But it's actually a smiling blonde you’re facing, who you absolutely don’t know. The surprise must be read on your face since she apologizes almost immediately.

"Hi! Sorry, but I saw you’ve been waiting for your drink for a while. I’m not working today, but I work here, so I’m gonna put you in front of the others."

"Uh… thank you?" you mumble.

You look at her hand still positioned on your shoulder but you are quickly turned away from it when she shouts what you imagine to be the name of one of the bartenders. And indeed, in two seconds he's facing you to take your order.

"You’re not from here, are you? I can hear your accent"

There was a time when her hand got off your shoulder while taking the order, but she continues to smile cheerfully at you.

"I am Spanish" you answer simply with a slight smile.

"Oh so great. I’ve never been to Spain, but I’d love to."

You smile at her and don’t know what to answer at that. Unlike your sister, you’ve never been very comfortable interacting with other people. It's always much better for you when you are introduced into a group by someone you completely trust. The way Jenni quickly attracted people’s sympathy has always been something you admired about her.

Fortunately, however, you are saved by the bartender who comes in front of you with the glass you asked him for.

"I’m offering it to you" says the blonde, watching you grab your purse, putting her hand on yours. "Sorry about the question, but you’re a lesbian, right?"

"What?"

The surprise can be seen on your face again in front of the question she just asked you. Yes you are and no you never hid it, but you don't understand why this question was asked to you now.

"Don’t take this the wrong way" continues your smiling interlocutor "But I don’t know, it’s just something I can see. You’re like very gay, right?"

"She’s also very in a relationship" makes an icy voice behind you.

You turn around and see Leila and her black eyes. She really doesn't seem happy about the situation but tries to remain cordial. And now that you see her behavior, you finally understand that the girl was hitting on you.

"And I’ll pay for her drink thanks."

Her voice is calm when she grabs her bank card and her other arm slips around your waist to squeeze you against her. But you know perfectly well that inside her, her brain must be exploding.

"Lei" you whisper to try to get her attention.

Talking normally would have been enough, given the ambient noise, but you especially wanted to prevent the blonde from hearing you. You study Leila’s gaze at length when she puts it on you. You don’t have a lot of time together this weekend and you really don’t want to waste time arguing.

But before you have time to draw conclusions, her payment is accepted and she leads you to the table you left a few minutes ago. It's now almost empty, there is in truth only Laia and her boyfriend who discuss by looking tenderly the other in the eyes, probably forgetting the rest of the world. Moreover, Leila chose to sit opposite them.

"I told her not to leave you alone" Leila groans, glancing at Laia.

"I told her I didn’t need her to come" you explain, not wanting her to blame Laia.

"Well, she shouldn’t have listened to you" said the brunette, raising her voice.

"Leila, please"

You give her your best little sad puppy look by laying your hand on her knee. Leila is looking at you and it seems to work even better than you had hoped. She finally sighs softly and you take the opportunity to lean against her, kissing her elbow.

"That’s exactly why I don’t like it when you go out without me. It already happens when we are together, I prefer not imagine what happens when you're alone"

"Believe it or not, this kind of situation only happens when I’m with you. It never happens in Spain, I guess people are more used to the Latin charm there" you smile softly.

"Maybe it’s not a good idea that I suggest you come and live here then"

You freeze suddenly, your brain recording what she just said. You take off from her to observe her, falling face to face with her amused smile.

"Are you serious?"

"Yes. My contract is coming to an end, and I don’t know where I’m gonna go next, but I don’t think you’re gonna have a hard time finding work around here for some months. And even if you don’t, you don’t have to spend a dime since I’ll be there. Now that Jenni knows, it makes things less complicated, no?"

You can’t help but smile softly as you imagine Jenni’s face when you will announce her that you're leaving Barcelona to join Leila in Manchester. You know your parents aren’t going to be against it, you’ve been living alone for a long time now. And anyway, you’re an adult and vaccinated.

"What do you think?" Leila asks after you’ve been quiet for a few seconds.

"I’d say yes, but you said it wasn’t a good idea" you joked mischievously.

But the joke doesn't seem to be Leila’s taste since, after pouting, she imprisons your lips with hers for a long and tender kiss.

"Come and live with me" Leila whispers against your lips after your kiss.

"I’d love to" you answer with a smile.

This will probably require a lot of adjustments, but you don't hesitate a single second. You know Leila won’t be against you going back to Barcelona whenever you feel the need. But the idea of waking up every day at his side is already filling you with happiness.

#woso x reader #woso imagine #leila ouahabi #leila ouahabi imagine #leila ouahabi x reader

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sitp-recs · 6 days ago

Note

please, whenever you get time to read some more and refresh your sirius x harry or remus x harry fic lists 🙏🏻 i gulped em all down and im craving more. as always, im so thankful for everything you do on here, and i hope you're enjoying your holidays!!

thank you, you too! Christmas with the family was a bit hectic but I’m finally back home and ready to rest 🙌 sadly I don’t have more Harry/Remus recs besides this list as I’m not familiar with the ship, but I’m starting this Harry/Remus/Sirius long fic after seeing it recced by @thistlecatfics and I’m so excited! I was sure I had a Sirry list but couldn’t find it, so I took this opportunity to create one. Enjoy :)

Flying in Place by @lqtraintracks (E, 1.6k)

Once they'd all gone, Harry turned and leaned against the countertop. Sirius stared at him from his seat at the table, long legs stretched out. They both listened to the others' voices retreating, their footsteps going slowly up the stairs.

Mischief Managed by @maesterchill (E, 1.7k)

Nothing has been said, nothing solemnly sworn, but they both know what's going to happen. They've known from the minute Sirius suggested this weekend away by the beach.

Sirius' Mark by lq_traintracks (E, 2k)

They may only be together a few months, but the mark Sirius leaves on Harry's life will last.

hold infinity by @the-invisibility-bloke (E, 3k)

There’s something to be said for a lapful of eager, writhing boy, and that something is hell yes. If only that boy were sober.

Slip Free of My Grasp by lq_traintracks (E, 3k)

I don't want to be bad for him. I want to do bad things and still be, somehow, inexplicably, good.

Just One More Secret by marguerite_26 (E, 3.8k)

A dog can be a lonely young boy’s best friend.

New Gods by @thecouchsofa (E, 4k)

It rocks Sirius to his core every time he thinks about it, because they aren’t the same – Harry and James. Sure, Harry pushes his glasses up with the knuckle of his pointer finger. James used to do the same thing when he had dirt or sugar or random potion essence on his hands. Other people do that too. Sirius has never seen it, but they do.

Nipple Clamps and Cinnamon Buns by lq_traintracks (E, 4.5k)

In which Sirius is horny, Remus is scandalized, Harry is sort of caught in the middle, and everyone else is oblivious. Happy Christmas!

Pigment by @wynnefic (T, 5.7k)

Sirius makes a promise to Harry during the war. Three years later, he keeps his word.

Reach Back by @sorrybutblog (E, 6k)

Hermione gets her hands on another Time-Turner. Harry uses it to go back to 1994 and suck Sirius’s cock.

A Light That Never Goes Out by @wolfpants (E, 6k) - Sirry + Draco

Sirius returns from the veil five years after he dies and five years younger than he was when he fell through it. When he and Harry decide to escape the dreary confines of London and Grimmauld Place in search of somewhere where they can breathe, they bump into someone completely unexpected.

There's love if you want it by RedHorse (E, 7k)

“I’m going to love it,” Sirius admitted more softly, grasping Harry by the hips, bruising. “Seeing you all shaking and spread out. Getting a good look at how you take them, one by one. And I’m going to hate it,” he added, bending his head to hide his gritted teeth against Harry’s neck. He smelled sharp, sweaty and clean. “Seeing other people touch you, have you. God. I’m going to be so proud and so furious and so fucking turned on.”

what remains by sirci (E, 8k)

The war's over; Sirius and Harry have settled into Grimmauld Place together. But the past still remains, and Sirius sometimes can't help but reminisce.

Face to Face by @ruinsplume (E, 18k)

Sirius really hadn’t meant for this to happen.

periculum by the_invisibility_bloke (E, 25k)

Harry needs someone to take control. Or maybe he just needs Sirius.

#asks #anon #hp rare pairs #Harry x Sirius #sirry reclist

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wreckedandpolemic · 5 months ago

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DAD!MATTY THOUGHT OF THE DAY!!!

Girlie going away for a little trip with Charli, so Matty is looking after baba for four whole days!!!

And it’s just him looking after them and letting them sleep in Matty and Girlies shared bed when they get fussy 😭😭😭😭

i’m not even lying i felt myself well up reading this it’s so CUTE… you have a sweet little family breakfast (matty cooks, obvs) then you kiss your babies and your husband goodbye and hop into charli’s car. vera’s lower lip is already trembling, ever the mama’s girl, and if she cries, fiona cries. and if the twins cry, alanis pitches a fit for attention, and that’s a headache matty would rather nip in the bud lol.

right, my girls, he says, scooping vera up before she can cry. what do you girls get up to when dada’s not home, hmm? alanis cocks her head, and he can literally see her scheming, the expression so reminiscent of you that he almost laughs. mummy lets us have chocolate for dinner and stay up past bedtime, she says, smiling like butter wouldn’t melt even as she shoots vera a death glare when she opens her mouth. fiona agrees emphatically and he laughs.

matty shakes his head fondly, still idly bouncing vera in his arms. her thumb is in her mouth and she tucks her head into his shoulder, his heart melting as she cuddles in close. i don’t know about chocolate for dinner, but i’ll see what i can do about bedtime, okay? how’s that sound, baba? she considers it deeply, and then nods. d’you wanna build a fort in the lounge? watch some films? and he makes it so sweet and soft and cosy, all your expensive throw pillows and blankets spread out on the floor, string lights wrapped around the chairs propping up the sheets, and despite his bad back and dodgy knee, matty gets on the floor with them, climbs into the fort and lets them crawl over him to get comfy before he starts the movie. he snaps a couple of pictures to send to you of the girls all cuddled up together around him, all smiling faces and curly little heads, and it’s so adorable that you almost want to turn around and go home and snuggle your husband and daughters on the living room floor.

matty ends up with a spread of picky bits for lunch/dinner, popcorn and crisps and frozen pizza galore, and he does let them stay up past bedtime, carrying them carefully up to bed once they pass out in the lounge. of course, he has to deal with three grumpy five- and seven-year-olds who haven’t yet figured out how to sleep in at seven a.m. the next morning (after getting off the phone with you at two teehee) and regrets everything. still, he’s determined to muscle through and maintain his status as a fun dad through the weekend, so he drags himself out of bed and makes them smiley-face pancakes to start the day.

alanis is sulky, fiona sullen and vera withdrawn, and matty’s like you know you could just go back to bed? there’s no law that says you have to wake dada up by pulling on his hair and jumping on the bed at silly o’clock in the morning? but of course, there’s no reasoning with them, so he tries a different tactic, bundling them back into the fort and spinning a slow, soft record until they fall asleep. his sweet, energetic girls are back when they wake up, and fiona pads into the kitchen to find him and excitedly asks to play tea parties. he obliges happily, indulging in their fantasy game with gleeful yes-ands.

it’s only a few minutes after matty’s settled down to sleep himself that vera shuffles into your room. what is it, baba? it’s a school night, you need to get good rest, he murmurs, frowning when he hears her quiet little sniffle. i miss mummy, she says, i want her to kiss me goodnight or i can’t sleep.

oh, sweetheart. mummy’s still on holiday with auntie charli, but she’ll be back before you know it, promise. he lifts her from the floor and pulls her into bed with him, kisses the top of her head and brushes away her tears. i miss her too, baba. come here, darling, just go to sleep, you’ll be okay. she tucks herself into matty’s chest, eyes fluttering closed, and his heart swells.

and ugh i could go on and on and onnnn this is the cutest fucking thing in the world oh this dilf why is he not fathering my children right neow…

#Cheers mate sons crying x #idk why i asked for this it has NOT helped the baby fever #matty healy x reader #matty healy fluff #blurb #writing #white and gold #alanis #vera #fiona

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cinnaleaf · 10 days ago

Text

「 Fall For You | A Very Merry Footballer Ficmas 」

summary: your crush takes you to santa’s hometown where he falls for you on a skating rink – literally.

warnings: really, really cheesy fluff, dominican slang, language 🎅🏾: even the best gifts come with a little falling | pt 5 of my ficmas series wc: ~2.7k

You weren’t sure why you agreed to coming to a Christmas themed village to ice skate with Alejandro. It could’ve been the way his eyes lit up when he suggested it, or the fact that he was really good at convincing you to do things you wouldn’t normally do because of his dazzling smile. Either way, you were here now – lacing up your skates and standing on the edge of an ice rink that looked like it was a set piece to a Christmas movie.

The two of you were visiting Rovaniemi for the weekend as a last minute trip he planned to escape Barcelona during the holiday break. The snow fell lazily and settled on wooden poles that were glowing with Christmas lights crisscrossing above the rink. There were families and couples circling the rink with all different levels of skill. Some were gliding around like ice fairies while the others were wiping out everytime the skate touched the ice. The stalls on the sides of the market sold mugs of mulled wine, spiced gingerbread, and waffles slathered in chocolate. It smelled like the epitome of Christmas – cinnamon, sugar, chestnuts roasting on an open fire, and frosty air biting at your nose.

Alejandro stood beside you, fumbling to pull his knit beanie lower over his ears. He stared at the ice curiously. “You know I’ve never done this before, right?” he asked, side eyeing you with a small smile that didn’t really mask the nerves he was trying to hide.

“That makes two of us then” you replied, nudging him with your elbow. “You wanted to come here though. Don’t back down now.”

Alejandro rolled his eyes and muttered something in spanish that you didn’t catch because you were too distracted by a little girl skating on the ice. She wore a pink beanie with a fuzzy pom pom on top paired with a pink glittery scarf as she zipped through the ice. She did a little spin and grinned at both of you, then skated off before you could process the type of skill she had for such a tiny body.

“Oh, she’s showing off” Alejandro said while shoving his hands in his coat pockets.

“Maybe..but it can’t be that hard to skate on solid ice.”

“If you say so....”

The rink wasn’t super big, it was cozy enough to feel magical, even if you lacked the skating ability threatening to ruin the picture perfect postcard illusion. You heard chatters of a group of older women handing out skates while sipping mugs of hot chocolate as you entered the rink.

“Do you think they have insurance...like if someone breaks a leg or something?” you asked.

Alejandro snorted and grabbed your hand while both of you shuffled to the edge of the rink. “Only one way to find out.”

Alejandro stepped on the ice first, still gripping your hand like it could save him from falling. You followed shortly after, gripping onto the rail with your free hand as your skates wobbled underneath you. The moment his skate touched the icy surface his body jolted forward and he froze, flailing his arms out to balance himself. He looked over his shoulder at you with wide eyes like he was betrayed.

“So...they don’t do balance conditioning in training I guess…” you joked, stepping onto the ice with what you hoped was a lot more confidence than what you felt. The ice was...solid. But it was also slick and unforgiving to anyone who didn’t know to coordinate properly with the slipperiness of it. Your ankles wobbled instantly, and Alejandro tightened his fingers around yours.

“Don’t make any sudden movements” you said, mostly to yourself because you were too scared to move.

Alejandro laughed. “Are you the police? It’s just a skating rink.”

“No. This is a disaster waiting to happen. Look at us.”

The two of you inched forward and Alejandro’s free hand gripped the rail so hard his hands were cramping. A younger boy skated past, showing off as he hopped to one leg, making Alejandro’s hand twitch in response.

“You better not” you warned, knowing exactly how competitive he was.

“I wasn’t going to do anything” he lied while side eying the showoff who couldn’t have been older than 10 years old.

The snow picked up and flurries brushed up against your cheek while also settling onto his beanie. He looked over at you, grinning despite the chaos of neither of you knowing how to ice skate. “This is fun though...right?”

“Yeah. If you have a humiliation kink.”

Alejandro’s laugh echoed across the rink. “You’re so dramatic.”

Before you could reply, his skate slid out from under him and he instinctively reached out for you in the process – meaning both of you went down like a pair of dominos. The ice was cold and wet against your knees when you landed on the ground. You were mortified, yet Alejandro thought it was hilarious.

“Are you good down there?” an older man called out in a thick Finnish accent from off to the side. “That one looks like it hurt!”

“We’re fine!” Alejandro yelled while waving the man off, his other hand was still gripping yours as you both tried to regain a semblance of dignity. “Ay coño (oh damn), are we really that bad at this?”

He started laughing so hard he couldn’t breathe, tipping his head back as he sprawled on the ice in a snow angel position. You weren’t doing much better. Your hands were pressed against the freezing surface and your knees were tucked as you tried to push yourself up. But every time you moved, your skates fell under you and sent you sliding sideways.

“I swear you’re useless” you huffed, but you were slightly smiling.

“Me?” he shot back, propping up on his elbows. “What did I do?”

“You dragged us here knowing damn well neither of us know how to skate.”

“I thought it was a good idea.” he said between chuckles while still trying to get off the icy floor. “We’re bonding. It’s romantic.”

“This is not romantic” you argued, flopping back onto the ice as your legs wobbled again when you tried to get back up. “We look dumb. No one else here is struggling this much! I can’t even get up!”

Just then, the pink scarf girl gracefully spun past you, twirling on her skates like she was a ballerina on ice. Alejandro scoffed, not believing his eyes. “Yeah, she’s doing that on purpose. That little girl is a paid actor.”

You rolled your eyes, trying to ignore the blooming warmth in your chest from how handsome he looked, even if he couldn’t skate and looked like Bambi right now. His beanie was crooked and there were snowflakes dusting over part of his curls that weren’t covered.

Alejandro shifted to sit up just as the girl executed another flawless spin. “She’s pissing me off” he jerked his chin toward the little girl. “Is she practising for the winter olympics or what?”

“She’s like 8 years old” you contested, wiping your damp hands on your coat while glaring at the skates as if it wasn’t your terrible coordination keeping you on the ground. “You’re beefing with a literal child.”

“I’m not beefing” he answered way too defensively for someone not beefing. “She’s just making us look bad.”

“Um, no. We’re making ourselves look bad” you deadpanned, bracing your hand on the ice to try and stand up again. That was a mistake. A big one. The moment you shifted to move, the skate slid out and you went down again with a dramatic thud. Alejandro started laughing so hard he started wheezing and rolling on his side like it was the funniest thing he ever saw. “You’re not as graceful with your falls like I am.”

“Shut up and help me!” you snapped, but you really wanted to laugh too.

“Alright! Chill out on me, don’t yell.” He got up and scooted toward you in a penguin shuffle type movement. “I’m coming to the rescue.” He reached out again, tightening his fingers around yours like he was about to get it right this time around. For a second you thought it may actually work....until his other skate slid and gravity pulled both of you down again. You both hit the ice with a thud, tangled together in an awkward mess.

“You are sooo bad at this” you wheezed, clutching your stomach because you couldn’t stop laughing.

“Me?” Alejandro’s head shot up with a grin full of teeth and mischief. “You keep bringing me down every time!”

“You literally dragged me down first” you shot back, swatting at his arm playfully.

“You could’ve stayed up!” he argued, gesturing wildly. “There’s railing all over. You’re supposed to hang on to that and be my support system!”

You squinted at him, trying to hold back your laughter and failing miserably. “How am I supposed to support you when you can’t even stay upright for 5 seconds?”

Alejandro’s jaw dropped and he shook his head. “That’s not true. I’m athletic.”

“Maybe on the pitch but definitely not on ice.”

Alejandro side eyed at you, offended. “Tu si hablas mierda (you’re chatting shit)” he muttered under his breath while shaking his head.

“Say it again louder so I can hear it” you challenged, sitting back on the ice like you had all the time in the world.

“Nah” he said while grinning. “You don’t need to hear it but it’s the truth. You’re talking nonsense.”

You rolled your eyes and let out a groan. “Ale..you’ve been on the ice for less than 20 minutes and you’ve been on the ground for most of them.”

“Damn” He placed a hand on his chest like he was so hurt. “Tu ves? (kinda like ‘oh yeah?’) This is why I can’t take you anywhere. Always coming for me.”

“You dragged me here! I wanted to do the reindeer safari instead!”

“Yeah but I thought this would be cuter” He gestured toward the snow falling gently around you. “The lights and the snow...it’s romantic, no?”

“No. We literally look like two penguins who’ve never been on ice before.” you scoffed, trying to shuffle back onto your knees but it was no use, you were failing miserably.

Alejandro threw his head back and started laughing at you. “Nah, chill. Penguins are elegant. We’re a lot worse. We look like those inflatable things at car dealerships.”

“Well...you’re not wrong about that” you bit back your grin as he reached out for your hand to try and help you up, but you didn’t trust him at all.

“If you make me fall again I swear…” you warned while eyeing him suspiciously.

“Relaxxx. I got you. De verdad. (forreal)”

You reluctantly let him pull you up to your knees and it seemed like you may actually be able to get up for once, but then he lost his footing again and he yelped, toppling forward to take you down with him again. Alejandro groaned dramatically, sprawled on top of you like he was so done with life. “Maldita sea, pero esta vaina me quiere matar! (damn this shit is trying to kill me)” he muttered while shaking his head.

“Aww” you giggled while trying to pull him off, but he was too busy pouting about his latest fall. “Are you okay?” You were trying to sound serious and be helpful but the fact that he literally couldn’t get up without falling over again had you in stitches.

“No.” he grumbled, lifting his head just enough to glare at you while also pouting like a child. “This shit hurts.”

You rolled your eyes and brushed some snow that had accumulated on his curls due to his beanie falling off in the process of the fall. “Awww pobrecito (poor baby). Sana sana colita de rana (heal heal little frog)” you started a nursery rhyme meant for children when they got hurt in a teasing tone, rubbing your hand over his shoulder like you were fixing his imaginary injury.

“Yo stop. That’s for little kids. You’re making it worse!”

You ignored him, finishing the nursery rhyme just to piss him off. “Si no sanas hoy, sanaras mañana (if you dont heal today you’ll heal tomorrow).” you sang softly while still rubbing his imaginary wounds, though it was mostly his pride that was injured.

He smirked at you as his pout twisted into a smile. “Tu ere mala loco (you’re crazy). You know that, right?”

“I’m helping!” you gasped in shock.

“Nah tu ta pasa (you’re doing too much). You’re embarrassing me.”

You kissed your teeth at his dramatics, poking his shoulder dramatically. “No. You’re embarrassing yourself and I’m trying to soften the blow. You’ve been on the ground more than you’ve been on your feet. Just get up without thinking about it too much.”

Alejandro huffed and braced his hands on the ice as if he was preparing to get up, but he was still very clearly thinking about it too much. “Aight. I’m about to get up this time. No overthinking.”

“And probably no balance either.” you teased, reaching out to brush your hands over the earring in his ear. “How can you dribble in rain during a match but not manage a single step on ice?”

“Different terrains. And grass isn’t this slippery.” he contested, tilting his head a little so your fingers would brush against his skin.

“Mmm..sounds like an excuse to me but okay,” you muttered while still playing with his earring.

“Keep playing with my ear like that and I’m staying down here on purpose.”

“Don’t tempt me” you replied, smirking while giving his earring a flick.

The corners of his eyes turned into a smize as he widely grinned at you. “Nah you’re a distraction.” He shifted around to push himself up again. “Watch this. I’m about to–”

He fell again. No grace, no coordination or balance at all. He came crashing down right back onto you and you bursted out laughing again.

“You’re so bad at this. The reindeer safari was a safer option.”

“This ice is just plotting against me” he complained, but he wasn’t all that mad judging by the grin on his face.

“No..that’s all you.” You wiped away the water from the melted ice on his face, but this time he leaned into your touch a little more. Neither of you said anything else as the skates whizzed past and the laughter from the rink carried through. The only thing you were focused on in that moment was how close your faces were and the sight of your breaths in the cold, frosty air. Alejandro’s eyes flicked to yours, meeting your gaze.

“You have snow on your lashes” he murmured, reaching up to gently brush the flakes away with his thumb.

“So do you” you whispered back.

A single snowflake drifted down from the sky and landed directly on your bottom lip. Alejandro’s gaze followed it, his breath visible in the cold as he leaned in.

“I got it,” he said softly. His lips brushed against yours, melting the snowflake while also stealing the breath from your lungs. The kiss wasn’t anything awkward or rushed, it was perfect and warmed you in the best way despite the cutting chill of the finnish air. Alejandro pulled back just slightly, licking over his lips but still close enough to steal another kiss if he really wanted to. He was widely grinning now. “Dime princesa (tell me)” he murmured in a teasing voice. “Is this romantic enough for you now?”

You giggled softly, shaking your head as your fingers brushed over his cheeks, still damp from the melting ice. “I think you made your point.” Your cheeks were hurting from all the laughter and smiles but you couldn’t deny this was sort of romantic...in a really bad, cheesy rom com sort of way. “But do a little research next time so we can have romance without all the bruises.”

Alejandro chuckled as he shifted to lay back on the ice, neither of you getting up as you both stared at the snow fall from the sky. There were a lot more skaters circling around you now as they zipped past in their own little world.

“Alright. Reindeer safari next time. But you have to admit this was worth it for the kiss..”

You smiled, flicking a bit of snow off his nose. “Maybe…. but you really should work on staying upright though.”

Alejandro smirked, leaning in to melt away another snowflake that landed on your lips. “Nah. I’m okay with falling. Especially if it’s for you.”

#alejandro balde #alejandro balde x reader #footballer x reader #footballer x y/n #footballer imagines #alejandro balde fluff #fem!reader #football fanfic #alejandro balde one shot

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c-e-d-dreamer · 17 days ago

Text

'Tis The Damn Season - Part Two

A/N: Omg we're back again! With more ✨pain✨ and also the start of family shenanigans! Writing this chapter was so fun, and I hope you enjoy reading it just as much, bestie @xxvalkyriesxx 🩵 @acotargiftexchange

Read On AO3 // Previous Part // Next Part

“Please.”

“No.”

“Eris, please. I’m…” Nesta clears her throat, fingers flexing against her mug of tea as she swallows her pride. “I’m begging.”

“Oh, I know,” Eris drawls, leaning back casually in his seat and straightening out the cuffs of his sleeves. “And I must say, it’s much less enjoyable outside the bedroom.”

Nesta huffs, trying to shove down her gnawing annoyance at his casual dismissal. She’s certainly not going to get him to agree if she snaps at him or picks a fight, so she decides to try a different tactic instead, offering Eris a saccharine grin. “Your boyfriend will be there.”

“Azriel is not my boyfriend. We are merely fucking.”

“And the two of you can fuck surrounded by beautiful snowcapped mountains. Doesn’t that excite your big, gay heart?”

Eris’s answering chuckle is low, little more than a huff of air as he rolls his eyes. “Big, gay heart? Homophobic. And besides, you of all people should know I’m bi.” He turns his attention back to the mug of coffee sitting in front of him, and Nesta has to bite her tongue watching him stir and stir and stir, clearly intent on making her wait. “Speaking of bi, why don’t you just ask Emerie or Gwyn to go with you?”

Nesta sighs softly. “Emerie is spending the holiday with Cresseida and her family, and Merrill denied Gwyn’s PTO request, so you are my last option.”

‘“Last option?” Eris asks, raising a single manicured brow. “Your sweet words are really convincing me here.”

“Eris, please,” Nesta begs again, reaching across the table and clutching at his wrist. “I can’t face… I can’t face them alone.”

“Them? You mean the man you’re still hopelessly in love with?”

Nesta snatches her hands away with a scowl. “I am not–”

“Alright, fine. I’ll do it. But only because this is just sad to watch.”

Nesta rolls her eyes at the comment, but she is still grateful for his agreement. Ever since her youngest sister had first called her to extend the invite, for a long weekend celebration at Feyre’s fiancé’s vacation cabin in the mountains, dread had settled in Nesta’s stomach like a pit. And she’d been unable to shake it ever since. Because she knew. She knew that he would be there. And every time she thought of him, that dread only curled tighter still, twisting like a fist right through her chest, around her heart. It was silly, really. After all, a whole year has passed since she last saw him. And yet…

Nesta doesn’t think she’ll ever forget that night standing on the front step to the townhouse Feyre called home, Cassian’s hand clasped in her own. She hadn’t realized it then, what the way he held to her hand so tightly had meant, clutching at her as though he was desperate to keep her there. She had only felt confused. Confused by Feyre’s surprise when she opened the door. Confused by the almost bewildered look that took over her sister’s eyes when her gaze snagged on their joined hands. Confused by her sister’s clear recognition of the man stood beside her.

Confused by the apologetic look Cassian had shot her way.

“You two… know each other?”

“Of course, we know each other. Cassian is Rhys’s brother!”

Four simple words, and suddenly, everything had felt like it was crashing around Nesta. She’d stormed away, desperate to get out of there, desperate to get air into her lungs around the death grip squeezing them. She swore there was a weight pressing and dragging down her heart, swore there was a ringing in her ear, but it hadn’t been enough to drown out Cassian calling her name, to hide the broken plea she could hear in his voice.

She had hated it then, the way her heart had skipped a beat at the fact he chased after her. Traitorous thing. Perhaps her mother had been right to chastise her for reading too many fairy tales and romance novels. But the betrayal had cut deeper still.

She couldn’t help but think back to all those nights wrapped up in Cassian’s arms. Just the darkness of her bedroom and warm breath between them, Cassian’s fingers tracing light shapes and patterns across the freckles spattered along her shoulders. All those whispered words she’d shared with him. All those secrets she’d shared with him.

She can’t help but think of those nights now, of the warmth of him. The warmth that glints amongst the golds and greens of his hazel eyes. The comforting warmth of his laugh. The warmth of his body wrapped around her own.

She can’t help but think of the coldness that cracked through her chest like ice after that night on Feyre’s front porch.

It’s why even after a year, she’s still not sure she can face him. But at least it’s only for a single long weekend. At least now Eris will be there beside her. So how bad can it actually be?

~ * * * ~

Nesta practically throws her bag onto the bed of their guest room, sighing softly. She closes her eyes, desperately trying to center herself. She can feel her heart still thundering an unsteady beat between her ribs, still feels almost dizzy with how frayed her nerve endings are.

It’s unfair.

Unfair that Cassian still looks so good after all this time. She swears that his hair is longer somehow, just slightly, where it falls in soft curls around his shoulders, like he hasn’t gone for his usual trim just yet. He still seems to prefer the stubble that lines his cheeks and the strong line of his jaw. His eyes are still a mosaic of greens and golds and browns.

Nesta always thought his hazel eyes were the most beautiful thing she’d seen.

It’s unfair that his voice would still be as low and warm as Nesta remembers it, like a glass of whiskey where it curls around her limbs and floods her veins. And the way he says her name… it still sends a shiver skittering up her spine. She used to love listening to him talk. Used to love hearing him laugh.

“Well, that was awkward.”

Nesta scoffs and rolls her eyes, turning around to face Eris where he’s setting their remaining bags down. He hums as he looks around what will be their guest room for the weekend, a distasteful frown tugging at his lips.

“Your sister certainly has… rustic taste.”

“It’s a mountain cabin. What did you expect?” Nesta asks dryly. “Besides, you should see her and Rhysand’s house in the city. I wouldn’t call that rustic.”

Eris hums again, but before he can say anything else, bright, raucous laughter echoes from downstairs. Even from here, Nesta can recognize and pick out the owner of each laugh. She knows what’s waiting for her, knows what she’ll be walking into, but Nesta reminds herself that she’s here for her baby sister, for Feyre. And for just a few days, she can suck up dealing with her little family.

Suck up dealing with him.

She and Eris share a pointed look between them, and then they’re finally stepping out of the guest bedroom, following the laughter down the stairs and into the dining room on the main floor of the cabin. There’s various pizza boxes strewn across the dark wood of the table and even more bottles of wine. Nesta’s eyes instantly find Cassian’s in the room, as they always do, as they always seem to do, like the two of them are forever trapped in each other’s orbit. He’s sat at the far end of the table between Morrigan and Rhysand.

The dark green of the flannel he’s wearing is soft-looking beneath the dining room lights, the color bringing out the hazel of his eyes and complimenting his dark features. He has that easy, cocksure smile of his painted across his face, but as soon as Cassian’s gaze meets her own, it slips away, his throat working as he swallows hard.

“Nesta!” Feyre greets easily, drawing Nesta’s attention to her. “You’re just in time. Between Mor and Cassian, we’re down a whole bottle of wine already.”

As if to prove her point, Morrigan grabs one of the opened bottles of wine, refilling her glass. “It’s not my fault Rhysie only brings out the good bottles of wine on Solstice.”

“Here’s a thought,” Rhys offers, raising his own glass of wine to his lips. “You could always buy your own high-end wine.”

“Where would be the fun in that?”

“And sitting around this table drinking old bottles of wine is fun?” Azriel pipes up from the other end of the table.

Morrigan huffs, her brown eyes rolling at the dry remark. She tosses her blonde hair over her shoulder with drama and flair, pushing up to her feet. The look she sends down the table toward Azriel is pointed and withering, as she grabs two bottles of wine in one hand and her glass in the other.

“You want fun, then? Fine. Let’s go do fun.”

With that, she strides out of the dining room, everyone surprisingly getting to their feet and following after her with just a little grumbling. She leads them into the large living room. The wall of floor to ceiling windows along the far wall offer a faint view of the line of pine trees amongst the dark, the soft, white flakes that drift down toward the ground in swirls. The stone fireplace along the right wall already has a fire going in it, bathing the whole room and the solstice tree in the corner in flickering light. It’s cozy, and everyone finds space to get comfortable, Nesta finding herself squeezed onto one end of the love seat beside Eris, Azriel on the other end.

“Alright, Az,” Morrigan begins from where she’s claimed one of the armchairs, her legs thrown casually over the arm. “Truth or dare?”

Azriel sighs softly. “Truth.”

“Boring!” Morrigan turns her attention across the room. “Cassian, truth or dare?”

Cassian chuckles, leaning forward in his seat with a wicked grin, and even from where Nesta is sitting she can see the glint that flares through his hazel eyes. “Dare, of course.”

“That’s more like it. I dare you… to run around the cabin in the snow. Naked.”

There’s a cacophony of laughs and groans that echo through the room, including Cassian who tosses his head back with a loud laugh of his own. With a shrug, he pushes up and to his feet. He reaches for the buttons of his flannel, taking his time to undo each one. It’s somehow Nesta’s worst nightmare and dream all at the same time, watching inch after inch of golden brown skin being revealed. Slowly.

When the last button is finally undone, he shrugs out of the flannel completely, and Nesta almost wants to scoff. Of course, he still looks as good as she remembers. His chest and shoulders are still just as wide, his arms just as large and bulging when he raises them to make a big show of flexing and posing. Black lines of ink still curve and swirl across his collarbones, reaching down his chest and twisting down his arms, and Nesta has to take a moment to fight back the memories of tracing those exact tattoos in the quiet dark and safety of a king sized bed.

Has to fight back the memory of pressing her hand to the center of his chest until she could hear the steady beat of his heart just beneath her palm, the heart he promised would always beat just for her.

“Stop stalling and finish your dare!” Rhys calls out, Feyre giggling from her place perched across his lap.

Cassian holds up his hands in a placating gesture before reaching for his belt buckle, for where the dark hair of his happy trail vanishes beneath the waistband of his jeans. He makes quick work of undoing both, shoving his jeans down until the thick lines of his thighs and the cords of muscle there are on full display. The bright red of his boxers clings to the skin there, the tightness of them doing little to hide his large bulge.

“You know,” Eris mutters quietly from beside Nesta. “I definitely get it now.”

There’s an answering scoff to the remark, and it takes Nesta a moment too long to realize the sound did not in fact come from her. She blinks in surprise, leaning forward enough in her seat that she can glance toward the other end of the loveseat, to where Azriel sits with his lips twisted in a barely concealed scowl.

“That’s as close as you’re going to get,” Cassian declares, drawing Nesta’s attention back to him just in time to watch him pat his concealed cock. “We don’t want little Cassian getting frostbite from the snow.”

That comment earns only groans from around the room, Azriel even going so far as to throw a pillow at Cassian’s face. He laughs it off easily, tossing the pillow aside and heading for the front door of the cabin. Nesta casts her eyes up toward the ceiling, refusing to watch the way Cassian’s thighs work, the way the fabric of his boxers surely show off the shape of his ass, as he walks away, but she can hear the cheers and jeers of their family.

Only when she hears the snick of the door closing does Nesta look around again, daring to glance behind her toward the wall of windows. Morrigan scrambles out of her seat and toward those very windows, phone already in her hand to record the whole spectacle. Cassian’s little more than a blur as he runs past, but it’s clear his grin is wide, clear he’s laughing the whole way.

Cassian bursts back through the front door a moment later, shaking the snowflakes from his hair and still chuckling to himself. “Fuck me.”

“I cannot believe you just did that,” Feyre comments through her own laughter.

Cassian merely smirks and offers her a wink, grabbing a blanket and wrapping it tightly around himself before settling back into his spot on the sofa. “Now then…” He glances around the room, his attention lingering on Nesta long enough that her breath catches. “Eris, truth or dare?”

“Forgive me, but after that display, I think I’ll play it safe with truth,” Eris tells him.

Cassian hums, tilting his head as though he’s thinking hard about what to ask. “It’s only been a few hours, but has the family scared you off yet?”

“Oh, most definitely.”

“Sorry, Nes.”

Nesta tries to force herself to laugh along with everyone at Eris’s response, tries to force herself to laugh at Cassian’s teasing remark, but she can’t find it within herself to meet his gaze. He was always the only one she ever allowed to get away with that nickname. It was practically his nickname and his alone, memories of Cassian softly and fondly whispering that very name against her skin crashing through Nesta’s mind like storm waves. Still, she catches his expression out of the corner of her eye, the way he seems to catch himself. The way his face falls as the realization, the slip of the nickname, seems to truly sink in.

Cassian has always worn his heart so openly on his sleeve. It had unnerved Nesta at first when she met him, especially with the way she had always kept herself so guarded and protected. It was the reason the betrayal had cut so deep. And seeing it now, seeing the way his smile vanishes into a pinched press of lips, the way his hazel eyes seem to dim and dull, it has Nesta swallowing hard, has a tightness threading through her ribs and squeezing tight enough that it’s hard to breathe.

Can he feel it too?

“Is it my turn, then?” Eris asks, pulling Nesta from her thoughts. “Nesta?”

Nesta sighs through her nose. “Yes?”

“Truth or dare?”

Nesta has known Eris long enough to recognize the fire flickering in his amber eyes, to recognize the slight upturn of his lips that means he’s holding back a smirk. And she doesn’t miss the way his attention flicks toward Cassian before returning his gaze back to her own. It’s clear that he’s not above playing dirty, perhaps looking to get even for her convincing him to be here this weekend, and it’s clear that this game is about to get dangerous.

Nesta is going to kill him.

“Truth.”

It still feels like the wrong answer somehow based on Eris’s expression.

“Solstice is a time for reflection, is it not? So, what would you say is your biggest regret this year? Perhaps, a phone call you never made…?”

She’s definitely going to kill him.

“My biggest regret? It’s inviting you here this weekend.”

That and not grabbing a bottle of wine for herself off the dining room table earlier. She’s going to need wine to get through the rest of this evening. And even more wine to get through the rest of this weekend.

~ * * * ~

Cassian lets out a soft sigh, rolling over in the bed. The new position doesn’t help, and he sits up enough that he can give his pillow a good punch. But that doesn’t help either. Nothing helps because it’s his mind that’s the problem, the way his thoughts churn and churn like a choppy sea.

He had thought that merely seeing Nesta earlier in the day had been bad, but sitting in that living room with her had been worse. Being so close to her and yet still so far away was so so much worse. The firelight had reflected off the golden brown strands of her hair, the flickering flames catching on the pale freckles of her face, the freckles that Cassian knows are echoed more prominently across her shoulders.

He hated the space between them, the way it yawned and stretched like a threatening abyss. He shouldn’t have had to watch her from across the room. She should have been squeezed on the sofa with him, tucked securely beneath his arm. She should have been draped in one of his sweaters to fight off the chill, just as she always stole his clothes. He should have been able to turn his head to press his lips against the spot just behind her ear, to whisper teasing remarks about their family and the absurd game of truth or dare happening around them.

Instead, Cassian was forced to watch Nesta exchange teasing remarks and jabs with Eris. Watch the way she rolled her eyes at him. Watch the way they shared some sort of knowing look as they answered their truths. Watch the way it was the two of them squeezed together on that loveseat.

Huffing quietly again, Cassian rolls over onto his back, blinking up at the dark ceiling. He pulls himself up into a seated position, dragging his hands through his hair, down his face. The scrape of stubble against the palms of his hands helps to soothe him a little, but it’s clear he’s not getting to sleep any time soon.

He tosses the blankets off his legs and slips off the bed, padding across to the door and out of his room. The hall is as dark as the bedroom, and Cassian dares to pause just a few steps outside. Dares to stop just outside the door to the bedroom opposite his own. He tilts his head toward it, but all is quiet, no sound reaching him through the wood.

If he knocked, would it be enough to wake her? Would she be willing to speak with him? Would she even answer the door? Or would it be Eris…

Shaking his head, Cassian continues down the hall on quiet feet, not wanting to wake the rest of the cabin either. He heads down the stairs and toward the kitchen, intent on getting a glass of water or maybe something stronger from Rhys’s liquor stores. He pushes through the swinging door, hand reaching and finding the light switch along the wall with ease, flooding the whole room in soft, yellow light.

And his steps come to an abrupt, jerking halt.

Eris sits on the kitchen island, red hair mussed and the pale skin of his cheeks flushed almost the same shade of the strands. A fresh lovebite stands out against his throat, just low enough near his collarbones that the collar of his shirt currently pulled aside will most likely cover it come morning light. The hem of that same shirt is rucked up around his waist, a hand splayed against the freckled skin there.

A hand marred by a criss-cross of scars.

Because it’s Azriel standing between Eris’s spread thighs. Azriel with his lips connected with Eris’s own. Azriel with his hand shoved down the waistband of Eris’s pants. And it’s Azriel whose attention snaps to Cassian with a hiss from between his teeth at the sudden onslaught of light that flares around them.

“You know what? None of my business,” Cassian mutters, flicking the light back off and promptly turning on his heel.

He’s quick to move away from the kitchen, but once he safely reaches the front entryway, there’s no stopping the surprised laugh that bubbles past his lips. He’d thought his gaydar was bad when Mor came out to him, but somehow this feels worse. Suddenly, Azriel’s mood swings fluctuating more than they normally do these past weeks make more sense. Suddenly, Cassian’s feelings toward Nesta and Eris feel very very stupid.

Shaking his head at his own idiocy, Cassian turns back toward the stairs. He prepares to head back to his guest bedroom without anything to drink, ready to find some other way to help himself fall asleep, but he notices a light from the living room. Not the low glow he would expect from the dying embers of the fire, but an actual light on in the room. Curious, he creeps around the corner on soft feet, peering his head around.

In retrospect, he supposes he shouldn’t be surprised at the sight he finds waiting for him.

Nesta is curled up on the sofa, a book opened and perched on her raised knees. She’s changed since earlier, now dressed in an oversized tee and a pair of soft looking sleep pants. Cassian recognizes the grey fabric that hangs slightly off her frame, knows that faded blue letters across the front spell out Adriata Dance Team. She’s taken the pins from her hair, the golden brown strands falling in a soft braid down along her shoulder, and Cassian almost wants to mourn not getting to pull them free himself.

Almost wants to mourn her hair not being down and undone completely.

She has her fist curled up against her cheek, the other hand turning the page of her book, and for a moment, Cassian can do nothing but stare. She looks so soft, so relaxed. So unguarded. He always loved seeing her like this. Loved the way her lips would part when she would get to a particularly good part of the story. Loved the way her eyes would widen when there was a plot twist.

He used to love just laying in bed beside her while she read. He’d simply watch her, tracking every change in her expression until he could catalogue what every one meant. The bit lip that meant the love interest was confessing. The dip between her brows that meant the love interest was doing something stupid. The faintest hint of pink spilling across her cheeks that meant she got to the smutty part of the book.

Nesta lets out a quiet gasp, leaning forward in her seat and quickly turning the page again in her book, and Cassian doesn’t even bother swallowing back his smile, entranced by the way her blue eyes flit back and forth across the pages with excitement. He’s half tempted to squeeze into the space beside her on the sofa, to wrap his arms around her waist and settle his head on her chest. To ask her to read her book aloud, so that it’s her lilting voice and the steady beat of her heart that finally helps him to sleep.

“Just one more chapter?” Cassian asks, finally breaking the quiet and stepping out of the shadows.

Nesta’s whole body jerks in surprise at the sound of his voice. Her head snaps up, the sound of her book closing loud in the otherwise quiet room. Her eyes narrow on him, but Cassian doesn’t allow the look to deter him, stepping fully into the room.

“Did you get to the smutty part?”

Nesta huffs quietly, turning her attention to the book in her lap, fingers toying with the corner of the cover. “Actually, they haven’t even kissed yet. Historical romances are all about the tension, after all.”

Tell me about it. The words sit on the tip of Cassian’s tongue, but he swallows them down hard. He could listen for hours to her telling him all about her current read. Could tease her for hours. But that was before.

“No wonder you’re up late still reading, then,” he says instead.

“I’m up late still reading because my guest room for the weekend is currently occupied.” Nesta sighs softly, her lips twisting into that adorable scowl of hers, her next words little more than a quiet mutter. “Doesn’t Azriel have his own he can use?”

Cassian chuckles softly. “Actually, Az got sequestered to the pull-out sofa in the basement. The cabin doesn’t have as many bedrooms as you think.”

“You got a bedroom.”

“Yeah…”

Cassian knows that he should tell Nesta that Azriel and Eris are actually in the kitchen, that there’s no longer anything keeping her from retreating to her own guest bedroom. He knows that he should turn and walk away, return to his own bedroom. He knows that he and Nesta should bid each other good night and leave it at just that.

But if there’s one thing that’s always been true, it’s that when it comes to Nesta Archeron, Cassian has never been particularly smart.

“You can crash in my room if you want.”

Nesta merely blinks at him for a few moments, as though she can’t quite wrap her mind around the offer, can’t quite believe the words he just spoke, but Cassian can see the exact moment they truly land.

“Cassian–”

“Totally platonically. No funny business, just somewhere to sleep. I promise,” Cassian jumps in to add, making a big show of crossing his heart and giving her his best puppy dog eyes.

Nesta rolls her eyes, and it’s so natural, so familiar. She always said she hated when he gave her that face, always said it was impossible to say no when he gave her that look. And Cauldron save him, he can’t help but pray that’s still true.

“Come on. We both know that Rhys chose the furniture here because it’s stylish, not because it’s comfortable. Do you really want to sleep down here?”

Nesta sighs softly, but she pushes to her feet, her eyes narrowing on Cassian. “Fine, but only because I’m exhausted.”

Cassian has to press his lips together tightly to keep from smiling, but there’s no stopping the way his heart trips over itself between his ribs. He gestures with his hand for Nesta to lead the way, following her back up the stairs and down the hall to his open bedroom door. Once they both step inside, Cassian shuts the door quietly behind them, taking a moment to close his eyes and breathe before he turns back around again.

Of course, Nesta has wasted no time padding across the room and toward the bed, setting her book down on the small nightstand. Even through the darkness, he can spy the slightly frayed edges of the white ribbon she favors to mark her place peeking out from between the pages. How many times had he found stacks of books with white ribbons at his apartment back when they were still together?

Nesta settles on the left side of the bed, clearly still her side, and tugs back the blankets enough that she can slip beneath them. Determined not to stare, not to get caught staring, Cassian moves to the other side of the bed. He slips beneath the blankets as well, taking a moment to get comfortable before settling on his side facing Nesta.

He hates that she has his back to him. Hates that her hair isn’t fanned out across the pillow and that he can’t run his fingers through it. Hates that despite the fact she’s laying down, he can still see the tense line of her shoulders and that he can’t slide his fingertips along the steel line of her spine to soothe her. Hates the stretching expanse of distance between them being as physical as it is emotional with the way Nesta has moved to the very edge of the bed.

“Did you want to build a pillow wall too?”

“Fuck off,” Nesta tells him, her voice clipped despite the teasing tone of his own. “I thought you said no funny business and sleeping only?”

“Pretty sure you have to relax to actually sleep,” Cassian continues, daring to scooch closer to her. “Did you forget that I’ve already seen you naked?” Nesta kicks her leg back, directly into Cassian’s shin, and he lets out a hiss from between his teeth at the contact. “I see your feet are still always freezing cold.”

“That’s what you get.”

She says it so haughtily, with such finality, that Cassian can’t help but laugh, quiet and soft in the dark of the bedroom. He doesn’t even care that Nesta’s cold toes are still pressed against his legs. All he cares about is that the tension in Nesta’s body has finally unwound.

All he cares about is that she’s here with him, even if it’s not quite how he wants.

He always slept best with Nesta in his bed. He could never quite pinpoint exactly what it was, the soothing lullaby of her even breathing, the reassuring warmth of having her in his arms, the comforting familiarity of her vanilla body wash and lily scented perfume. Hell, maybe it was just Nesta. But whatever it was, Cassian always fell asleep with ease, always slept well and deep, with Nesta by his side.

Even now, Cassian can already feel the way his mind has started to calm, his muscles loosening and eyes growing heavy. It’s almost too easy to give in to the weight of sleep’s embrace, his hand stretching across the mattress until his fingertips are a breadth away from Nesta, reminding himself, reassuring himself, that she’s really there. Even if it’s just for now.

—

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