#baby zombie piglin

[duxwriter]

The kids are doing something....

[seabear5300]

Following up my Last post:

Thinking about a name change for my son.

[yogsandchaos]

Honestly if you wanted me to make a Minecraft movie but also made me give it a generic safe plot I would not go isekai, I would go “oh shit that’s a child” route

I’d make it animated and give steve and Alex a baby piglin and everyone’s like “why isn’t it a zombie? We need to get it back home!” And then it’s just the plot of the first ice age movie basically. Generic, predictable, kinda boring, but harmless and decent enough for a first entry into a Minecraft movie. Solid 7.5/10 movie with plenty of more room to take riskier ideas in the future and enough found family to get at least some fandom presence

[metfell]

I think Michael's existence has forever rewired my brain about how i see baby zombified piglins

oh absolutely. i will never be able to kill a zombie piglin ever again

[cxyotl]

Piglin stuff bc im. bored and kinda sad.

-Piglins are a Netherian race of anthropomorphic boars. The term “piglin” is an Overworld name for the race, literally meaning “pig-like” or “derived from pigs”. the term was adopted by the piglins, who’s word for themselves could be translated to a similar phrase.

-Piglins are matriarchal and live in clans but the eldest son of the clan is trained as a brute, or soldier in the multi-clan bastions as a representative. “brute” is, again, an Overworld name based on the Piglim word for soldier, which is a grunt that sounds a bit like the English word “brute”. the Piglin word is actually more like “brrutk.”

-Piglin language (Grüntish) is made up of a series of grunts, oinks, and squeals. one grunt can mean many different things based on culture, context, and tone. for example, take “brrutk”. that grunt or word can translate to soldier, eldest son, diplomat, or even villain depending on how the grunt is enunciated.

-Because Piglins naturally have a warmer body temperature, about 115° F or 46° C, cold temperatures are a better indicator of illness than warmer temperatures. the zombie virus, also known as the rotting disease, is a disease that happens when Netherians are exposed to colder temperatures or are ill enough that they become cold.

-The rotting disease pandemic hit the Nether severely, wiping out fauna and flora for a long time before it was managed. Piglins, their forests, and their main sources of food (hoglins and striders) were especially affected.

-Piglins make their clothes from hoglin and strider leather. Their main source of meat is hoglins, and they usually tame striders as transportation. Hoglins are sometimes captured and placed inside of bastions to protect the area or be released in battle against enemies, but this is extremely dangerous and therefore quite rare.

-Professions within Piglin clans are loose and unspecialized, since every clan member needs to learn and act as farmers, doctors, and hunters simultaneously. Matriarchs (Kruuk), heirs, and high-ranking men in clans do the same work as the rest of the clan

-Clans are family based, but sometimes can contain as many as four or five family units. These are organized and ruled by the oldest women from each family, all working together as one democratic “council”

-LGBT identities are honored in Piglin communities. transwomen who used to be brrutks are particularly respected for their ability to become kruuks and their experience in a bastion.

-Bastions (military bases that are organized and run by multi-clan alliances) are manned by the brrutks, prisoners, and volunteers. Serving in a bastion is both an honorable thing and a punishment depending on why you are there.

-Killing a hoglin is the most honorable thing a piglin can do, and an apprentice piglin (a younger member if a clan who is training) killing their first hoglin is a cause for celebration as it marks the end of their training. Hoglets (baby hoglins) are never hunted, but they can be captured to be brought into bastions.

[marv3l-drag0ns]

Making my own idea of what the minecraft movie could have been.

Steve wakes up alone, in the wilderness. He's got no idea whats going on, but its slightly implied that theres something off to him about where he is. He starts walking and messing around with stuff, maybe making some tools or a crafting bench. Then he finds a village, and is so happy to be around other people, but hes gotten there right at sunset, so all the villagers are locking up shop and hunkering in their homes. He's confused until he hears the zombies groans, and then is terrified and begs to hide in someones house. A nice family takes him in, and he falls asleep scared.

In the morning, he wakes up to see deep gouges and arrows stuck in the walls of many homes. He keeps looking, and starts to see creeper holes, and splatters of gore where a severly broken down iron golem defeated a few monsters. Days pass as he slowly gets accustomed to village life.

One day, he hears the bell being frantically rung and everyone going back to hide in their homes. The iron golem, which is barely working now, staggers to its feet to defend its home and people. Pillagers rush into the village, vindicators start cutting down doors, and a ravager smashes into the iron golem, finally breaking it. Steve's freaking out with the rest of the villagers, and those who arent killed are tied up to be brought back with the pillagers. Steve is one of those.

The pillagers go back to the mansion, where the Summoner tells steve that the pillagers are looking to bring a world destroying entity to the overworld. The summoner speaks reverently of it and the eternal darkness it will bring with it. Steve is terrified, but stands up to the summoner only to get cut by vexes.

Steve is later brought to the nether to be used as a distraction as the pillagers delve into the nether fortress. As they go through the nether, he sees the immense damage the pillagers have wrought upon the Piglins and their bastions, and feels really sad when he sees a baby pokin their head through a broken wall only to be pulled back by a parent. They reach the fortress, and steve is badly burnt by a blaze, but manages to get a few rods. He also manages to fight a wither, barely escaping, in order to remind the viewers that it ccould be the wither the pillagers are tring to summon.

On the way back, the pillagers spot an enderman and shoot at it, only to curse when the enderman grows enraged and kills one of the pillagers. A vindicator cuts it down, but doesnt take the pearl, which steve notices and does take.

Steve manages to escape the mansion, running off with an iron axe, some gold boots, the blaze rods, and the enderpearl. he also rescues another player prisoner, Alex. They escape, and alex helps Steve make the eye of ender, saying that the Pillagers want to tame the dragon that lives in the void and use it to shape the overworld into the wastes that is the End.

Steve and alex must then race to find the stronghold and get good enough gear to slay the dragon, while still dodging pillagers. Herobrine is teased as the first player who tried to kill the dragon, but no one knows what happened to him. Theres a funny scene where steve is super afraid of a silverfish but alex kills it easily. Theres a heartbreaking scene where they go back to the nether only to realize they dont want to kill the endermen either, but a piglin mother sees this and trades them a few enderpearls for steves boots.

They make it, they kill the dragon and alex takes the egg, the end fleets are teased if they want to make a second movie. Steve is sad about the loss of the village and about the devastation the piglins faced, but is happy to have made new friends. The end poem is read and steve cries about it, mourning a past he may never remember. the universe gives him a hug. THE END.

[zombie2mi-nu]

Happy Holidays!

(Minecraft Creeper, Ghast, Blaze, Baby Skeleton, Baby Zombie, Maguma Cube, Baby Wither Skeleton, Baby Zombified Piglin, Baby Piglin, and Enderman)

✨🎄Happy Holidays🎄✨

▼drawing process

[rozugold]

Ok ramble time

Ok imagine you’re Tubbo. You just got your distant brother figure and your bestie off that damn mountain, though not in the most ideal way (I will make those comics eventuallyyy)

But that’s beside the point. You saved your best friend! You did something right for once! Except sike! your best friend hates you now, and you kind of hate him too (you let him know as much) then you guys stop talking. Which is fine, i mean, it’s not like he was your entire world.

You return to Snowchester! It’s a ghost town, obviously. There’s a memorial of you, decorated with fresh flowers and dusty knick knacks. The flowers are from Ranboo, he’s pretty sweet. He’s also been the one to upkeep your town while you were gone. You hang out with them a lot, they’re the only one who sticks around these days. They’re pretty sweet.

You try to go back to doing the things you did before you died. There’s those nukes you never finished making, so you work on them. And you work on them. And you work on them. And you get nothing done. Your brain feels scattered and far away, it’s impossible to focus. So you give it a break, you can afford to. It’s pretty safe these days with Dream gone, you know because you keep tabs on everyone on the server. There’s some strange things going on here and there but nothing too concerning. You hang out with Ranboo more.

Ah fuck, you two find a baby. It’s a piglin, infected but not fully zombified as it has enough thought to run up to you two for help. So you take it back to snowchester and give it potions to stop the infection. Ranboo is worried it won’t work, you tell him it probably won’t. But you reassure him that if it doesn’t, you’ll take it back to the nether to let it “live” out the rest of it’s days. (Do zombies live?) Ranboo spends the night in your attic with the piglin. He’s pretty sweet. Regardless you tell him to not keep his hopes up too high.

Next morning, it worked! You “dub thee Michael!” Ranboo is relieved. There’s a kid living in your house now.

There’s a kid living in his house now. The timeline becomes unclear at this point since I’m still figuring it out. But now that Michael is in the picture Tubbo starts getting worried. He realizes he has no way of protecting him. Maybe the syndicate come visit Snowchester and that shocks him into thinking about the nukes again. And so Tubbo starts throwing himself into projects again. And it starts getting ✨bad ✨

Honestly, It’s been really fun figuring out how Tubbo deteriorates because everything is so internal with him compared to Tommy. It’s obvious with Tommy, you could see him visibly fall apart (think his exile skins, he stops feeding himself, he doesn’t care when he takes damage) But with Tubbo it isn’t so obvious, atleast not right away. Sure his eye bags get darker and he stares off into space for a little too long. But he still looks put together. (Habitable maybe. Or a learned skill.)

Maybe he eventually gets the nukes working but they’re not as successful as he wanted them to be and that guts him. He takes it as another failure. What if he’s just cursed? Is everything he cares about forever doomed to feel like holding water in his hands? What is wrong with him?

I’m gonna share a song and explain this next part using its lyrics because I’m so ILL over it, it’s the most di!tubbo song ever. Throw on …Well, better than the alternative by Will Wood 👍

Tubbo’s feelings towards Michael is complicated… He absolutely loves him to death but he’s really apprehensive about being a dad. He has this fear that he’s going to somehow corrupt Michael and or fail to keep him safe. So he ends up becoming emotionally distant from him and at his worst he gives him up completely to Ranboo.

I think Ranboo and Tubbo get married as a joke at first. But Ranboo continues to love him so unconditionally and honestly and Tubbo catches a crush, which is absolute HELL for him at first sjdhdj. I imagine him being arospec so this crush is a completely new and surprising feeling and he doesn’t know how to handle it. So he doesn’t, and keeps playing it as a joke even as their relationship develops.

Also the repeat of “everybody’s up on everybody’s business” is very fitting for describing the server. There’s things to be developed here I just haven’t yet… I’m just thinking about the possibilities like the egg, the syndicate, las nevadas… hmmm

This song is begging to be made into an animatic because I can imagine Tubbo screaming at Tommy during this part. He was just trying to help the best way he could… yet things still end badly, and everyone ends up hurt… di!clingy oh di!clingy, they’re such a mess. A bitter, angry, grieving mess. Wait ok i wasn’t planning on writing grieving there but then my next thought was “who are they grieving?” EACH OTHER. THEY’RE GRIEVING EACH OTHER. o(-(

Ok that’s it. Phew that was a lot of writing. Here’s some drawings for your time

[panda-wearing-pants]

Life Series if it was regular hardcore (season 2)

Rule change: All final deaths count

Ep 1

17: Grian (Bdubs)

Ep 2

16: Mumbo (Piglin Brute/Lava)

15: Joel (Lizzie/pit trap)

14: Lizzie (Baby Zombie)

Ep 4

13: Skizz (Ren)

12: Cleo (BigB)

11: Bdubs (Blaze)

Ep 5

10: Scar (Etho)

Ep 6

9: Impulse (Scott)

Ep 7

8: Jimmy (final death)

7: BigB (Pearl/Trapped chest)

6: Tango (Martyn)

Ep 8:

5: Etho (Creeper)

4: Pearl (Skeleton)

3: Martyn (Scott)

2: Ren (Scott/Zombie)

1: Scott

The final four get the same placement, as well as Mumbo

The final three are eliminated the same way as in the real Last Life

Grian and Joel both go down 10 places

Average score for first two seasons (score is the percent of other members a player did better than):

BigB and Pearl: 81.25

Etho: 79.81

Martyn: 78.37

Scott: 76.92

Impulse: 71.15

Ren: 66.11

Tango: 57.45

Cleo: 54.09

Jimmy: 45.51

Grian: 30.77

Bdubs: 26.44

Scar: 21.88

Lizzie: 18.75

Joel: 17.79

Skizz: 16.35

Mumbo: 6.25

[its-elvie-innit]

sunny and michael need to meet. for qsmp people who don't know, Michael was a baby zombie piglin that tubbo adopted with his tax benefit husband in the dsmp, he was an npc but also adorable and headcanoned/treated in-game as a very shy, bubbly, bright kid who was very kind and sweet. Sunny is like all those things shifted to the right, she's enthusiastic and bossy too, and I think it would be the greatest thing for them to pretend meet

[chaoticm0therfvcker]

The Real Minecraft Movie

So, in one of my previous posts, I mentioned that I would be making my own version of the Minecraft movie because looking at the trailer it’s probably gonna be ass. So, here’s some info on it

Note: looking at how elaborate the plot is, I’m realizing now it would probably be better as a tv show instead of a movie, but 🤷‍♀️

Characters

Obviously, there will be Steve and Alex, who will take the role as the mentors of the main characters. Also they will be their correct races and have their correct skin colors.

Then, onto the main characters. They go by Kay and Archer, however since they are video game avatars being controlled by players in the outside world, their full names are Chaos_Girlie and ArcherTheRogue (Archers player likes DnD, okay?). A quick overview of how they got there is that they gained sentience even though they’re avatars in a video game. However, these full names will not be revealed until a goofy post credits scene at the end of the story.

Kay is the same average height as all other Minecraft humans and humanoids, and she has long, dark purple hair that’s half pulled back into a ponytail. Her avatar sports a purple t-shirt under a black jacket and black pants to match, as well as white socks and no shoes. Later on, she gets diamond armor that is later turned into netherite armor with amethyst trims. She’s the adventurer/miner of the group, and she often brings Archer along on adventures so that he can hunt and learn how to fight. She wields an axe as her main weapon, though she also uses a sword when she is sparring with Steve. She’s considerably more experienced than Archer for reasons that won’t be revealed until the twist. Also she loves axolotls and catches a cyan one she names Snowflake.

Archer is the same height as Kay, and he has light pink curly hair, kinda like the wool of a pink sheep. His avatar sports a light blue hoodie with a little black creeper face in the top corner of the front of his shirt by his shoulder, and black shorts with dark blue sneakers with white laces. Later on, he gets iron armor, but Kay helps him get netherite so it eventually gets replaced by netherite armor with diamond trim. His main weapon is a crossbow that he uses to shoot light blue fireworks at enemies, as well as a trident that he mainly just uses to get mob heads during thunderstorms. He is the hunter/builder of the two, though he has to bring Kay along with him for hunting sessions at the start because he isn’t very experienced with fighting. During one of their adventures, Archer finds a baby pink sheep and names it curly in reference to them having matching hair.

Also, later on they befriend a piglin brute they name Ender, because he helped them get ender pearls in a warped forest biome as a symbol of their friendship.

Enemies

Obviously, they will face the regular hostile mobs such as creepers, spiders, and zombies, and since both of them are more focused on exploring and hunting and stuff, they end up having to deal with phantoms very often.

They will also face off against the boss mobs of the game. They’ll start with the Elder Guardian, then they’ll accidentally spawn the Warden while exploring a cave, then they’ll spawn the Wither in the nether once Steve and Alex tell them about beacons (it will be the bedrock wither so it’ll spawn backup wither skeletons halfway through and be very unpredictable with its movements) and then the Ender Dragon will be their final battle.

The overall main antagonist of the game is Herobrine. He has been the main villain for Steve and Alex since the beginning of time, and he is the reason Steve and Alex are enlisting in the help of Kay and Archer to kill the Ender Dragon (this will be explained further in the plot section). They do end up fighting against him, but he ends up being spared under the conditions that he gives Ender the ability to travel to the overworld without being zombified and that if he ever gives them trouble again, he will be killed on the spot.

Plot

The movie starts with a montage of the different biomes along with a narrator saying the words from the very first trailer of Minecraft with Otherside by Lena Raine playing in the background. Then, it cuts to Kay and Archer spawning into the world, spawning about a foot off the ground and face planting into a plains biome. Groaning, they get up while rubbing their heads, and once they see each other, they introduce themselves. Since they don’t want to say their full names, they opt to say “Call me Kay; Call me Archer”. Off in the distance, there is a badlands biome in one direction and a taiga biome in the opposite direction, and they opt to go to the taiga biome so they can get some wood. While Kay is chopping away at spruce trees, Archer finds some sweet berry bushes and while trying to collect some of the berries, he ends up tripping and falling into the bush, taking damage with each movement. Since neither of them have any armor, he is taking some serious damage and needs help. This is where Steve and Alex come in; while they’re returning from an adventure, they see Archer struggling and decide to help him out by tearing apart the bush and offering him a regeneration potion. Once Archer sees who just helped him, he starts geeking out, and when Kay turns to see what all the commotion is about, she starts geeking out as well. Touched by the amount of admiration they are receiving, Steve and Alex ask if they want to tag along on their adventures, offering to train them and even help them navigate through all of the typical major milestones for players. Once she hears about this, Kay excitedly remarks that she’s waited so long to kill the Ender Dragon, which is a bit of a strange comment considering she just spawned into the world. Despite this, Archer ignores her remark and they start on their first adventure.

Kay tries to urge them to start by exploring the badlands biome off in the distance, but Alex states that they’re not ready to face off against all of the mobs within the mineshafts and instead bring them to a village to get food, armor and weapons instead. It’s a taiga village because those villages don’t get enough appreciation. Steve and Alex tell Kay and Archer to explore the village while they go talk to the armor and weapon smiths to hook them up with some weapons and armor. Kay goes off and explores some of the farms, stealing some pumpkins and potatoes but getting caught by a farmer villager. She apologizes and says that she’s new to the world and just wants some food, and the villager decides that she can keep the food as long as she gives him back some of the potatoes she stole so he can replant them and to bring him some of the bones she gets if she runs into any skeletons. He then mentions that she’s going to need to bake the potatoes and turn the pumpkins into pumpkin pie, and he decides that if it means she’ll get out of his hair, he’ll help her get the ingredients for the pumpkin pie. Meanwhile, Archer is exploring the village by going into all the villager houses and petting all the random animals in pens. All of a sudden, he runs into an iron golem. Intimidated, he stumbles back a little bit, but the iron golem offers him a poppy, which Archer takes while squeaking out a quick “thank you” before scrambling away. Steve approaches him and asks where Kay is, because the smiths they were talking to are ready to trade with them. Hearing Steve and Archer talking, Kay approaches them while stuffing her face with pumpkin pie to ask what’s going on. Steve tells them to follow them, and once they approach the armor and weapon smiths, Alex introduces them and hands them emeralds for trades.

With her emeralds, Kay excitedly gets herself an enchanted diamond axe, but soon realizes that she screwed up and doesn’t have enough emeralds for armor. Archer, on the other hand, gets himself iron armor without realizing that he could’ve gotten diamond armor and runs out of emeralds before he can get a weapon. Steve and Alex both facepalm at how stupidly they wasted their emeralds, but reassure them that they can collect materials to get more emeralds or get the materials to make weapons and armor themselves. Kay and Archer ask if the villagers have any spare beds that they can borrow, and Steve tells them to wait until nightfall to see if there are any spare beds. Soon, the sun sets, and Kay and Archer end up in neighboring cabins, with Kay sleeping in a purple bed and Archer sleeping in a blue bed that he wants to dye a lighter blue once he has the flowers to do so. The next morning, they grab their beds, thank the villagers for hosting them and trading with them, and they start their next adventure.

The four decide that their “next adventure” should be finding a place to build a base before setting off on other future adventures, and Alex states that their base should be near a body of water, that way they can have a dock to go fishing and have easier access to other biomes further out. Kay still wants to go to that badlands biome, but holds her tongue this time and just follows along. While they’re walking, Steve and Alex explain that their current mission is to kill herobrine so that they would be able to kill the Ender Dragon one final time. Archer asks them to elaborate, and Steve explains that herobrine is a godlike entity that doesn’t like when players get too powerful. Alex then takes over, explaining that in order to “complete” the end battle, they need to kill the Ender Dragon twenty times, creating a ring of end gateways around the main island. She states that they had already killed the Ender Dragon nineteen times, but that they were interrupted the final time by herobrine and spawned back into the overworld with none of their stuff, being forced to basically start from square one. Kay starts geeking out because she thought it was impressive to be able to kill the Ender Dragon once, let alone nineteen times! Then, they come across an area that would be perfect for their base, a flower forest with a warm ocean in front of them, a large plateau with an exposed cave in the side of it and a cherry grove on top of it to the right of them, and a beach to the left of them with a snowy peaks biome way off in the distance. Building a quick ladder, furnace, crafting table, and a few chests, they burrow into the ground and create an underground base, agreeing that they would expand their base once they’ve done some mining. Crafting up some stone pickaxes, Steve, Alex, and Kay go into the cave, but Archer says he’s gonna explore the ocean since he has respiration on his helmet. Steve tells him to be careful of drowned, pufferfish and guardians, and warns him about the mining fatigue he’ll get if he decides to explore an ocean monument. Archer promises to stay safe, and with a mock salute, he’s off to explore the ocean.

Since nothing overly exciting is currently happening to Kay, it cuts to Archer exploring the ocean. He’s swimming around, collecting sea pickles, and after he gets poisoned by a pufferfish, he kills a few pufferfish to see if he can do anything to them once he returns. Swimming out further, he discovers a shipwreck with iron, diamonds, lapis, and a treasure map. Soon, he finds an ocean monument, and as Steve warned, he gets the mining fatigue effect. However, before he has the chance to go inside, he feels a sharp pain in his side, and looking over in the direction of where he felt the pain, he sees a drowned holding a trident, ready to attack. He decides to attack the drowned so it’ll stop attacking him, and after a long and hard battle, he punches the drowned enough times that it dies and drops the trident, which Archer immediately grabs.

Swimming to the surface to catch his breath, he soon dives back under the water to explore the ocean monument. The battle against all the guardians was pretty hard, but with the help from his new trident, he was able to defeat everyone and even found the gold in the ocean monument. He tries to mine it with his stone pickaxe, but the gold block didn’t drop. Slightly discouraged, he soon realizes that he has a crafting table and a bunch of iron from the shipwreck he had discovered earlier, so he crafts an iron pickaxe and successfully mines the gold. Proud of his work, he returns to shore, deciding to go to the beach near their base to find the buried treasure listed on the map he found.

Then, it cuts to Kay, Steve, and Alex. They are currently at the outskirts of a lush cave, and due to the brightness of the cave warding off hostile mobs, they decide to set up a temporary little camp of crafting tables and furnaces. Kay asks what biome they are in and remarks that it’s beautiful, so Alex explains that it’s a lush biome, with lots of cool plant life, fish, and these cute little creatures called axolotls. Steve makes a remark that Alex got lucky and was able to explore lush caves when they first started being generated while he was stuck in a dripstone cave trying not to get impaled. Kay feels something nudging her and hears a little squeak, then looks down to see a little cyan axolotl looking up at her. Overwhelmed by cuteness, she scoops it up and starts cuddling with it, and Steve quickly crafts a bucket and hands it to Kay, telling her that if she wants to keep her new friend alive, it needed to go in the bucket. Kay gladly obliges and names it Snowflake, and once they reach the ores finish smelting, they return to the surface to check on Archer.

When they emerge from the cave, Archer excitedly approaches them and tells them about his discoveries, which Alex is very happy to hear about and offers to teach him how to use it. Steve and Kay go off to build their base, and Alex crafts a few target blocks to train Archer with. She tells him how to throw it and how to aim properly and stuff, and he does surprisingly well, which Alex takes notice of. She makes a remark at his natural skill, and he replies by explaining that he saw how the drowned was attacking him and just did something similar to that. After they train a little while longer, they notice a pillager patrol and Alex tells him to use his new skills to kick their butts, saying that she’ll be close behind him with her bow. After killing all the pillagers, he gets his crossbow, which Alex congratulates him on and shows him how to use it, later explaining that he could use fireworks as ammo once they get gunpowder, paper, and dye.

Alex and Archer return to Steve and Kay to see them struggling to build a house. They’ve got a frame up made of stripped spruce wood, and they have a little farm and and some sugar cane off to the side, but they’re arguing about how to build the rest of the house. Kay is trying to say that a cool castle made of stone bricks would be awesome, while Steve is arguing that her idea is way over the top and they should just do a cute little cabin reminiscent of a villager house. Archer jumps in and says that deepslate bricks would probably look nice, and they could still do a cute little cabin and invest more of their resources into a nice underground base. Kay and Steve shrug and agree that that’s a good idea, and it’s back to the caves to get some deepslate.

While they’re exploring, Kay is awkwardly trying to shove her new diamond armor on while she walks, when suddenly they approach an ancient city. Steve says to tread carefully because they might spawn the warden. They start to explore, when Kay activates the first skulk shrieker. Kay freaks out, but Steve reassures her by saying that it takes three skulk shriekers being activated before the warden actually spawns. As the explore, Archer accidentally steps on the second shrieker, and not a moment later, Steve himself trips and sets off the third one. The group goes back and forth trying to determine “was that three? That couldn’t be three, right?” When the warden climbs up out of the ground and Archer quickly squeaks “yep, that was three!” before the group starts running in opposite directions. Alex yells that they have to avoid stepping on any more shriekers because multiple wardens can exist at the same time. Yada yada, they sneak around and attack the warden from all directions, and boom, warden defeated. They quickly exit the ancient city, grab the deepslate they need, and get the hell out of there.

Once they finish building their house, Steve mentions that he grabbed some obsidian before they left, so they can start their next adventure; navigating the nether. They build the portal, Alex gives them a quick overview of what they might run into while they’re exploring, and to stay close to them. They enter the nether and start out in a nether wastes biome, which causes both Steve and Alex to breathe a sigh of relief because the nether waste is arguably the easiest nether biome to survive in. Alex points to the nether gold ore on the walls and ground and tells them to mine it because they’ll need it for bartering with piglins and avoiding pissing the piglins off. Archer asks where they can find piglins, and Steve explains that they can sometimes be found in groups exploring the nether, but it’ll be easiest to find them in bastions, preferably treasure bastions because they have a lot of cool treasure.

After a bit of mining and exploring, they discover a treasure bastion, and Kay and Archer immediately run in, excited for all the treasure they’ll find. However, they immediately get approached by a piglin brute trying to kill them. Steve shouts and says he was trying to warn them about brutes, and Lay goes to take a swing at the brute. However, she soon realizes that she could probably get him to stop fighting by taking his axe. Therefore, that’s exactly what she does, albeit with a bit of struggling. The brute kind of does a double take, and looks at Kay with surprise and admiration. As a way to show his admiration, he begs to befriend the group, offering to help them navigate the bastion and get ender pearls. Kay asks if he has a name, he says no, and they decide to name him Ender. As promised, Ender helps them navigate the bastion, keeping other piglins and piglin brutes from attacking the group and helping them get gold, lodestones, soul speed enchanted books, and even some netherite, though he says that they’ll have to mine for some as well. Then, once they’re done, he leads them to a warped forest biome to get ender pearls. Archer asks why they didn’t just trade with piglins, and Ender explains that it’s not the most reliable method and could end up just being a major waste of gold. Alex gives them a quick debriefing about the fact that endermen attack people who make eye contact with them and that projectiles don’t work to fight them, so Archer will have to use his trident to do melee attacks. There’s a montage of them fighting the endermen, and soon, they have all the ender pearls they need.

Once they’re done killing endermen, Steve explains that they’ll need to go to a nether fortress in order to get blaze rods that will be turned into blaze powder. Ender offers to help them, and after a while of searching, they find a fortress. However, it’s in a soul sand valley, so Alex warns them that there will be more wither skeletons than normal and that they’re incredibly dangerous. Alex says that she can hold off the wither skeletons with her bow, and Archer says that he can help out with his crossbow. As they’re fighting Archer manages to get a wither skull, and Alex excitedly explains they’re pretty rare and if he can get three of them, they can spawn the wither, which is a difficult boss but will drop a nether star that they can use to build a beacon. Once they finish fighting, Archer explains to Kay and Steve what Alex explained to him. Kay excitedly announces that they should spawn it, and while Steve is a bit apprehensive at first, he agrees as long as they’re careful. So, they spawn the wither, almost die, Kay has a panic attack from almost dying, and they get the nether star! Once they’re finished, they leave the end, but sadly Ender can’t follow them because he’ll get zombified.

Since they had to build a new nether portal, they end up spawning pretty far away from their base, but Steve and Alex are able to figure out where they need to go. As they’re walking, Archer pulls out an ominous potion and says that he got it from that pillager patrol he got his crossbow from and asks what it does. Steve tries to explain that it will give him a bad omen effect that could spawn a raid if they go into a village. Not knowing the weight of that situation if it were to happen, he says that it sounds really cool and drinks it, conveniently just as they’re approaching a village. As they hear the loud sound of a horn, Steve quickly demands that they go into a house and set their spawn in one of the beds. Once they do that, they quickly run back outside to see pillagers approaching the village, as well as a bunch of villagers scrambling to get inside and two iron golems charging to attack. A little after the first wave, Archer find a pink sheep and affectionately names it curly, but Kay snaps that he can fawn over his new pet later and that they need to fight right now. About halfway through the raid, Kay is killed by a swarm of vexes, and that’s when the major twist is revealed. Alex lunges forward to grab Kay’s inventory, and through the window of one of the villager houses, she sees Kay hyperventilating and sobbing with her chest to her knees. Alex rushes inside to see what’s going on, tells Kay that she managed to grab most of her inventory other than some random seeds and mob drops like bones and gunpowder, then starts to comfort Kay. For a while, Kay is too distraught to speak, and after a moment, Steve and Archer finish the raid and rush in to check on Kay as well. Once they comfort her and tell her that everything is okay now, Kay reveals her big secret, aka the big twist of the story.

After a very emotional moment, the four start their final adventure- killing the Ender Dragon. There’s a quick little montage of them following the eyes of ender as they float through the sky, but just as they’re about to dig down to reach the stronghold, Herobrine spawns, ready to fight. Steve and Alex try to charge at him, but he blasts them back with a single lift of his arm because he’s just stupidly overpowered like that. Kay and Archer then try to attack him, but he blasts Archer back and physically pushes Kay back, asking if she was actually capable of helping defeat the Ender Dragon knowing her past in a sneerful tone. Kay is at a loss for words, but luckily, Archer is able to sneak behind him and blast him with a firework, which causes him to be disoriented and give Steve time to start slashing at him while Alex helps Kay up. Once Kay is up, the four of them attack Herobrine using a strategy similar to how they fought the Warden, and soon, he’s not dead, but he’s down and unable to fight. Kay steps on his chest and points her axe at him, telling him that this would be a good time to start begging for mercy. He obliges and starts begging, saying he’ll do anything to satisfy her. Kay says that he needs to give Ender the opportunity to travel to the overworld and that if he ever gives them trouble again, it’s on fucking sight if you know what I mean (she’s gonna kill him). Then, they dig down to the stronghold.

Once they reach the portal and activate it, Steve and Alex say that they’re gonna jump in and get a head start on getting rid of the end crystals, and that Kay and Archer can jump in whenever they’re ready. Standing at the edge of the portal, Kay takes a deep breath and Archer grabs her hand. He says “the end?” And Kay replies with a nod and says “the end.” In reference to the two Xbox achievements you get when you enter the end and kill the dragon. They enter the portal, and the final battle begins.

When they enter the portal, they see that Steve and Alex have just finished breaking the end crystals, and that the dragon is currently spewing acidic dragons breath at them. Over the roar of the dragon, Archer tells Kay that he’s gonna try and shoot the dragon with his crossbow while she needs to watch for it to perch so she can get some melee hits in. Once she starts doing it, Steve soon catches up to her and starts attacking the dragon as well. Soon, the dragon is at low enough health that one critical hit would be enough to kill her. The dragon perches, Steve steps aside and tells Kay to do the honors, and she finally kills the Ender Dragon for the first time in her life. Once they go through the portal to go home. Kay is faced with the end poem, which leaves Kay in tears by the end of it. Once she spawns back into the overworld, Archer asks her what’s wrong, which she responds to by saying that she’s fine and just thought the end poem was really beautiful.

Timeskip

As per any movie or tv show, there’s gonna be a timeskip at the end showing how everyone is doing since the action has settled down. In this case, the timeskip is 5000 days later (Minecraft days obvi). The base is much bigger and has multiple houses and farms. One of these houses is made of terracotta, implying that they eventually did explore that badlands biome. Alex is filling up a creeper hole in the distance, and Steve and Kay are sparring with netherite swords. Steve accidentally kills Kay, but luckily her inventory was empty so all that dropped was her sword. In a panic, Steve runs into the terracotta house to see if Kay is okay, and while she’s a bit shaken up and catching her breath, she’s a-ok. Suddenly, Archer bursts in, tightly clutching a rolled up map. Kay asks what it is, and Archer explains that there’s some sort of new structure called a trial chamber, and that he really wanted the two of them to explore it together. Kay and Steve both go outside, and Kay asks Steve and Alex if they’re coming with, and they both say that they can trust that Kay and Archer can handle themselves, and to just make sure that they remember to bring totems, shulker boxes, fireworks, and some nether quartz ore in case their elytra break on the way (there’s mending on their elytra so it’ll heal when they collect xp). Kay and Archer tightly hug Steve and Alex, and without thinking, they shout a quick “thanks mom, thanks dad!” Before running off in the direction the map is pointing in, which Steve and Alex are both beyond happy to hear.

The Twist

Disclaimer: skip to the post credits scene section if you don’t want spoilers

Anyway, the big twist is that this isn’t Kay’s first time in a Minecraft world, and that’s why she’s so much more experienced than Archer. She had a giant, beautiful base in a badlands biome, and she hadn’t been in a Minecraft world since the Nether Update. She was really proud of her world, and since she was in her netherite armor full time, that’s why her avatar had socks but not shoes. She died in the fight against the Ender Dragon, and the way she died she finds really embarrassing; she was standing too close to one of the end crystals when she blew it up and got blasted into the void. Since it was a hardcore world, she didn’t respawn and lost her world. From there, she kind of just floated around in a comatose state for who knows how long until she spawned into that world with Archer. Due to this past trauma, she craves adventure but is also extremely afraid of death, having a panic attack whenever her health drops down any lower than five hearts. Luckily, once she told everyone this secret of hers, they accepted her. This is also why Steve let her get the final hit on the dragon.

Post Credits Scene

So, the first part of the credits before the post credits scene is basically just a slideshow of the different voice actors and directors in the Minecraft font being listed, one name on each slide. The background of each slide shows the voice actors’ respective characters in some sort of action pose in various biomes (of course, Kay is gonna be in a badlands biome). Also, since I feel like we can’t have a Minecraft movie without it, this part of the credits is gonna be paired with Don’t Mine At Night as the song.

One day, the four of them wake up with their gamer tags above their heads. Steve explains what’s happening, but is also kind of confused on why it’s happening just out of the blue. Since Steve and Alex are npc’s in this world, their gamer tags are just Steve and Alex. Kay and Archer on the other hand… their gamer tags are a bit more embarrassing (their gamer tags are in the second paragraph of the characters section). Of course, they start laughing at each other, and at the same time are both trying to defend themselves. Soon this ends up in them getting into a physical altercation, and Alex separates them, telling them to calm down. One of them says “yeah, calm down *gamer tag*” which triggers the other to lunge at them, and it cuts to the rest of the credits.

The rest of the credits is just like any other list of credits, and it will have pigstep by Lena Raine playing.

Be sure to give me any opinions or feedback! I really wanna know how you guys feel about my version of the Minecraft movie! Thanks for reading!

[charlotte-queen-owl]

Sometimes I wish I could relive the Minecraft moments me and my sister had. The first house we built was made out of oak. Finding our first diamond and losing it in lava. Her getting obsessed with farming. Us getting a pet sheep. Me getting so many dogs and horses she got sick of me making stables. Her moving out our starter house to make her own base. Made this huge treehouse project hotel we didn't even get to use at ALL. Us adopting baby drowneds and baby zombie piglins. We defeated the ender dragon with only iron armour and hit the final blow with a cake. "Mining off camera" because we got tired of dying every 5 minutes in the caves. Getting Netherite and our first enchanter. Finding out you could pull out enchanted books from the sea. Going on a treasure hunt. We made a whole elaborate roleplay when we found a flower biome village. She got engaged with a blacksmith. I made a church. A raid happened when we were wearing our WEDDING SKINS and it was the day before the wedding. Her fiance cheated on her with his brother, made a baby, and we raised it to be a fisherman. We made a vacation cottage near a river there. And a graveyard for her parents that didn't survive the raid. Somehow made a religion whenever it rains and the Goddess favours her more than me. All my drowned boyfriends died under mysterious circumstances. Had a birthday party. Spammed so much cake onto her base as a prank. She chased me down. Kept fighting over the Ender egg. Never used the Elytra even though we had it. Used the head as decor to our door. We had a collection of bells on each of our bases as competition. Rang those just to annoy each other. I had an orange bed and she had a pink one.

[seabear5300]

Anyone Want Baby Pictures?

No? Too bad. Look at my beautiful children.

Mason is the eldest, and also the biggest menace. He refused to stay still for a picture, hench why I had to add his name in post.

[arckiaym]

"Viking? Mrx. Sizukie made breakfast." "..." "c'mon... It's eggs, you like those?"

"hey buddy," "go away legundo.." "I can't do that bud."

"did you get any sleep?" "...no" "yeah..uh. yeah, me neither."

"you neither?" "Yeah, I didn't realize how much I'd like. Like I started thinking, like, if I went by myself."

"and like, it was fine. I'm more efficient. I'm faster, I don't need to hunt as much. Honestly I might've already made it, probably. I'd definitely get in liss trouble, that's for sure."

"are you trying to make me feel worse??" "Haha, no, hold on."

"what I'm tryina say, is that I'd never-"

"-ever. Want to."

"hey guys? Everything ok in here? Eggs are getting cold."

"oh! Hehe, silly boys.."

"here lemme help. Momma's gotta do everything around here, huh?"

"how y'all aren't cold I'll never know. Hah..hybrids."

Mimirs. Eepy time.

In honor of pig!viking two releasing today I finished this up faster than I intended. The brain rot has me by the THROAT

Ok buckle up I have so much to say, ok

First of all, mrx sizukie, what kind of a name is that? The kind of name when you've been following a neon orange Suzuki down the freeway for like 4 hours. Also I like to imagine that pigs don't have Mr and Mrs but just, everyone uses mx and mrx because I think ? Idk they're not human why would they have human honorifics. I'm not calling ppl who use mx or mrx non human btw, u get what I mean

Second of all, eggs? Yeah, eggs. Baby zombie piglins spawn with chickens sometimes, so. So there ya go, they have chickens, idk man.

Third of all? I let them hug, that's right!! Hug it out you emotionally unavailable pig boys!! Comfort piglin head grab and bonk also both made an appearance, hope ur happy with that. I like to think that whenever piglins go to sleep their body temperature drops so that's why they sleep in piles, and is also why they got a lil blankie :)

Also I didn't talk about the backpack last time but they've got a notebook in there! (It's vikings, it's all his notes on how to be a pig. He's learning the language in there, his handwriting is terrible.)

Also when legs flops on the bed and traps vikings legs? Did anyone else's dad do this when there was a Talk to be had? Just like sit on ur feet so u can't escape? Well mine did so that's what that's about.

I made sure to add a lot of "like" and "yeah" cause if you've ever had a Conversation then u know that those nothing words are EVERYWHERE

But yeah, legs realizes how much he'd miss viking if he wasn't around and is like "aw balls this kid is my brother"

I was drawing the last panel, the shaded one, and I was like, "am I a furry artist?" So, let's all think about that for a sec. I mean like kinda, right?"

Hi @amberstormblade ily /platonic ur writing is my absolute favorite and part two is making my synapses FIRE

[qsmpbutwithsignlanguage]

Rewatching Philza vods and-

"Fucking Jesus Christ. This is the Nether I guess, and my god, am I just never gonna step foot in it [cue laughter in the most emotionless, broken way I've ever seen someone laugh]."

I think the baby zombie piglin broke him, everyone.

[nerdyneko265]

In honour of the last dungeon meshi Thursday (I know it’s Wednesday, shut up)

Minecraft cooking!

Where I go through the mob bestiary and treat it like a cook book.

Chicken, cow, pig, goat, rabbit, horse, wolf, sheep, cat, cod, salmon, tropical fish, llama- you know what these are, you don’t need me to explain. Both Laios and I are bored, moving on.

Villagers, pillagers, piglins- don’t eat people. I know piglins are half pig but listen. DONT EAT PEOPLE! You know the orcs? This is the same thing.

All zombies ever- technically edible. We’ve all eaten rotten flesh. Senshi would not be proud of us, it’s not very nutritious. Also, cannibalism.

Skeletons- I guess you could make a soup stock. But they’re better for fertilizer.

Vex and allays- ghosts. I don’t think we can make sorbet here either. I don’t think they work like that.

Bats- very small, not much meat. Hard to find and catch. But if you’re in a cave and in a pinch or just curious, sure why not

Puffer fish- cook very carefully. Probably just better for potions. But you can eat puffer fish, your chef just needs to be trained in how to cook it.

Mooshroom- now we’re talking. Beef, but with mushrooms. Comes with mushroom soup too. Usually raised for soup rather than meat, but still a good source of meat that’s pre seasoned.

Squid- mmmmm calamari… Laios enemy… also good for squid ink. I hear it goes well with pasta.

Cave Spider- venomous, could technically remove the poison like with puffer fish and boil the spider but I dont know. Small but have spawners, so you’ve have a steady supply

Spider- not venomous, and bigger. So I guess you could. Probably taste like giant scorpion since they’re both arachnids.

*dont eat spider eyes, they’re poisonous

Endermen- for personal reasons, I will not be eating endermen. They don’t even want to fight unless you antagonize them. More importantly, don’t eat endermen, it’ll probably fuck you up. They’re built for the end and full of chorus fruit. They’re also so skinny, not much to eat there. Ender pearls have a chance of giving you a parasite. And will probably teleport your stomach out of your body. You could try but it’s probably like jerky and you’ll see god.

Incidentally, I think chorus fruit tastes like vanilla

Polar bear- probably very tough meat. Very gamey. Beware though, they eat people too

Iron golem- that’s a robot. Don’t eat metal. DONT EAT REDSTONE! ITS RADIO ACTIVE.

Snow golem- probably makes good ice cream. Don’t eat it. Let it make ice cream. It’s just snow after all. It would just taste like water.

Blaze- it’s more of a spirit than an animal. Good for potion making, probably not tasty. A central core surrounded by rods, maybe that core has some meat on it, probably tastes a little spicy.

Striders- why? Why would you eat these poor babies? What did they ever do to you? They’re probably reptiles, so you could definitely eat them but could you live with that knowledge?

Elder guardian- really old puffer fish. Cut carefully for good sushi. But it’s such a hassel, you’re better off having a puffer fish. Plus, they’re endangered, so like, come on.

Guardian- jokes on you, it’s hollow on the inside. Check the mob bestiary, they have no internal organs. Could probably get some meat from the outer flesh but that’s also the spikes, so beware.

Ender mite- remember those parasites from ender pearls? This is them. Could def cook them though. They’re fair sized and full on meat. You’re probably be tripping balls though.

Ghast- like a squid, but balloon. They are filled with gas, to allow them to fly. So much like a dragon, likely have a gas sac that could contain gases that could ignite, be careful. But sky octopus. Lots of meat.

Magma cube- slime but spicy. Magma cream is probably yummy. We know it’s ok to ingest because it’s in potions, so I think it should be ok to eat. Just wait got it to cool a little

Slime- senshi has recipes for these buggers.

Shulker- I can only assume it tastes like living armour. It’s definitely a mussel

Silverfish- it’s a bug, it’s big, enjoy.

Wither skeleton and the wither- please, for the love of all that is holy, DO NOT EAT THE WITHER! THIS IS HOW WE GET THE PLAGUE! YOURE GOING TO GET WITHERING AND DIE!

Sniffer- I know they’re really big, I know they’re probably full of meat and they have eggs, but look at their little faces. Could you really eat them?

The Ender dragon- I mean, you beat her, might as well I guess. Apparently dragon is delicious. But also, probably full of the end, probably going to fuck yup up a bit

And now, for the big one

Creeper- as we all know, creeper skin feels like dry, crunchy leaves. It’s a moss monster with a tnt block inside. So, if you carefully cut around the explosive, you now have a very dangerous vegetable. Thick “meat”, might make a good salad.

Thank you for coming to my ted talk