#azaleas mean family and unity!!!

[st4rbwrry]

𝒟𝒜𝒩𝒢𝐸𝑅𝒪𝒰𝒮𝐿𝒴 𝐼𝒩 𝐿𝒪𝒱𝐸.

꒰ forbidden love with a southern boy sounds fun. a pastor for a father, and living in a small town with god-fearing, gossipy folk was not. ꒱

🫧 𐀔 . . . 16.8k. fem!reader, lowercase intended, farmer!eren + bluecollar!eren, domesticity, established relationship, talks of religion, small mention of abuse and alcoholism, forbidden love, sneaking around, age difference + time skip, lotssss of arguments, oral sex ꒰ f + m ꒱, quiet sex (they try ;3), fingering, spanking, lots of kisses, eren’s rlly affectionate, foreplay, rough sex, size difference, spitting in mouth vv briefly, sub/dom dynamic, lots of dirty talk, multiple orgasms + overstim. minors do not interact. reblogs & comments are greatly appreciated. ♡

꒰ theme songz + mocha’s note ! ꒱ . . . i’ll be by edwin mccain + movie by avenoir. . . i rlly like this plot, didn’t mean for it to be so long srry. but it’s good so ;) very notebook themed.

 

getting married in secrecy was every family’s worst nightmare. the opportunity to see their creation speak soul-written vows to their lovers and part ways into unity. to laugh and dance together, snap photos, share cuisines and three-tiered intricately crafted fondant cake. helping their daughter pick out a dress, and their son a tux. all of those memories are delicate and forever cherished. to be ridden of that felt cruel. but, what family deserves that when they don’t accept who you're giving your love to? when they find the person you’re marrying selfish, undeserving of your love, and rude? those are the words people used to describe eren, your husband. 

the sun beats down upon the quaint southern town of georgia, casting long shadows across the freshly cut lawns and pegasus-painted houses. a gentle breeze rustles the leaves of the ancient oak trees lining the streets, their gnarled branches stretching towards the cloudless sky. in the heart of this idyllic community, nestled between the town square and the bustling main street, stands a modest yet stately residence. this is where you resided years ago with your father, the reverend pastor kain. the house exudes warmth and tradition, its wraparound porch adorned with rocking chairs and potted azaleas. a white picket fence encircles the property, symbolizing the tight-knit neighborhood and the values upheld within these walls.

inside, the air is thick with the scent of pot roast bubbling within the choral blue dutchoven and the soft hum of gospel hymns drifting from the living room in soft symphonies from your sickly mother. diagnosed with kidney failure yet always ensuring the three of you had the warmest days. the cool interior provides a welcome respite from the summer heat. the polished hardwood floors creak beneath your feet, leading you past a formal dining room with a sturdy oak table and matching chairs. family photographs line the mantel above the fireplace, capturing moments of joy and love.

your father's study lies at the end of the hall, the door slightly ajar. through the crack, you catch a glimpse of his desk, cluttered with stacks of paperwork, sermons, and bibles. the faint aroma of pipe tobacco wafts out, mingling with the musty smell of aged books. despite the comforting atmosphere, an undercurrent of tension hangs in the air, a palpable reminder of the forbidden nature of your love and the stern disapproval of your father, the man of god who once guided you with unwavering devotion.

you’ll never forget the intensity of your heart racing as you held eren’s hand within your own and stood before your father proclaiming your love. the look of disappointment on his face with furrowed brows, smile lines deep as he frowned and stared unwavering. the stern posture he’d taken by leaning up in his chair and hearing the nonsense coming from both of you. the bickering between him and eren while he held your hand the entire time, silently telling you he’d protect you while you shut out the aggressive sound of your father’s voice. 

your love blossomed in stolen moments, snatched between the cracks of duty and expectation. in the hushed whispers of late-night phone calls, the furtive glances exchanged across crowded rooms, and the fleeting touches that set your skin ablaze with longing. the two of you would meet in secret, hidden away from prying eyes and ignorant tongues. in the shadows of the park, where the crickets sang their serenade and the stars twinkled overhead. or in the cozy confines of his pickup truck, parked along lonely stretches of highway, miles from home.

there, in those intimate spaces, you’d lose yourselves in each other. lips meeting in passionate kisses, hands roaming freely, exploring the curves and contours of your bodies. you’d talk with him for hours, sharing hopes and fears, dreaming of a future where you wouldn’t have to hide your love. 

you met on a warm evening on your way to the farmers market, finding him churning butter with broad muscles, naked from his upper body and inked out over his neck and dominant forearm. there’s a slit in his right eyebrow that also held a piercing. slightly wavy brown hair pulled into a bun with baby blue overalls clinging to his skin. 

when he locked eyes with you while you pushed a cute green grocery cart, your heart immediately bloomed. those slanted grayish-green eyes with long, brown lashes of his stealing your strength. his movie star smile with a toothpick lodged between his teeth as he finally caught your gaze. the sun shone down on him, casting a golden glow on his tanned skin and ricocheting off the silver dog tag around his neck making him look even more attractive. 

the man gave you a wink before returning to his task, a sly smile playing on his lips. his arms flexed as he churned a bit harder, obviously showing off now that he knew he had your full attention. shyly, you pull your eyes away from him and pretend you don’t notice him staring as you inspect the vegetables before you. once he had finished, he wiped his hands off on a cloth and strode over to you, his overalls hanging from his hips now after he popped them free in front of you, sweat clinging to his skin. he stood in front of you, a cocky smile plastered on his face as he crossed his arms over his chest, a few beauty marks littered across his skin.

he waited for a moment before speaking up, his voice low. “you know, you’re not very good at pretending you don’t notice me.” he chuckled as he spoke. “i can see you stealin’ glances at me from the corner of your eye.”

goddamn, you nearly short circuit from hearing his voice. it’s deep and slightly raspy. the smell of him is almost natural and sweet. you caught a whiff of apple. or maybe butter given he’d been working on it for the past three hours. 

“and if i was?” 

eren’s smirk widened at your snarky response. he took a step closer to you, his body now mere inches away from yours as he looked down at you, tilting his head slightly. “then i’d say you have a thing for hot and sweaty country boys.”

“yuck, that was so corny,” you giggle in his face. 

he rubbed his forehead with his palm, feigning disappointment at your response, but he was secretly enjoying the playful banter between the two of you. “mhm, yeah. it was, wasn’t it? sorry, i’m not good with talkin’ to pretty girls.” 

you hum. “mhm, i bet you say that to all the girls. it’s a small town, and you’re attractive. i hear lies.” 

“y’know, a liar doesn’t usually apologize for his bad pickup lines. unless . . . ” his voice was a low, sultry murmur now, and his eyes held an intensity that made you feel as if he was peering into your soul. the heat from his body felt like it was seeping into your own, and the air around you seemed to crackle with electricity as he spoke. “he means it. and you aren't calling me a liar are you, darlin’?” 

the way he looked at you made your heart thump hard in your chest, and the fact that he was so close made it difficult to think straight. there’s no doubt that this man was the most beautiful person you’d ever seen, in real time at least. 

“you’re staring awful hard, like what you see?” 

“maybe i do.” 

“only maybe?” 

“i do,” you playfully roll your eyes. 

“geez, w’na marry me already,” he jokes, and of course you laugh like a lovesick teen. “i like your laugh, it’s cute. teehee.” 

listening to him mocking you made you gasp and lightly hit his arm. “stopp, i don’t sound like that!” 

“do so,” he slowly licks his lips, scanning you from head to toe. “i’d like to get to know you, if you don’t mind.” 

you nearly choked at the suggestion. me? he wants . . me? no way. “uh, you don’t even know me. didn’t even ask if i had a boyfriend.”

“are you tryin' to say you have a boyfriend?” 

“no, i don’t. but, i'm not allowed to.” 

a frown briefly tugged at his lips as he heard what you said, the meaning behind your words sinking in. not allowed to? “how come? strict parents? celibacy? . . nun?”

“okay, asshole,” you scoff. 

eren throws his hands up in defense. “sorry, just honestly askin’.”

you began to fidget at the thought of telling him about it. what if he ran away because he wanted nothing to deal with it? he notices your reluctance, and almost says something to dismiss the conversation for your sake. “my father’s extremely religious, well known in this town, actually. pastor kain.” 

“oh,” eren nods, understanding clearly now. he tried to be as considerate as possible, even though part of him didn’t care. if he wanted you, he’d have you. “so you’re the daughter. funny, me seeing you only now. he’s that strict he don’t let you come out or sum?” 

“ ‘the daughter’. why do you say that as if i have some type of rumor about me going around?”

“no, no, it’s nothing too serious. maybe a little insensitive, but . . i’ve just heard people whispering about your family and whatnot. things like your father being up his own ass or you being a  . . i’ll dial it down to prude ‘cause i find other shit said derogatory, and i'm sure untrue.” 

pursing your lips, you hum at the things being spoken behind your back. it’s not surprising. “thank you for telling me that. i’m sure a lot of people have opinions about me and my family. my dad can be a bit of a hard ass. and i surely wouldn’t call myself a prude. just because my family is religious doesn’t necessarily make me feel the same.”

“you’re not christian?” he asks. 

“no, not at all. i mean, i believe in something. i pray, i talk to someone, but i don’t consider them god. personally, i call them my fairy godmother,” you smile sweetly, thinking that sounded kind of silly. “sorry, that must sound childish.” 

“it doesn’t, it’s cute,” he chuckles. “i feel the same. agnostic is the term for me. plus, i’m more of a spiritual person. crystals and shit.” 

your brows raise. “wow, that’s rare to hear a man say that, at least here. it’s refreshing.” 

"why's that? you not from here?"

"nah, me and my mother are from the city. philly. he ended up moving us here after getting the deed to his grandfather's house. we've been here since i was ten."

eren shifts where he stands, removing the hair tie from his hair that cascaded down to his shoulders. tucking a strand behind one of his ears and shoving his hands into his pockets. “so does he have you on lockdown for the summer?” 

“pretty much. he’s got me set on studying for college. any other distraction in my path he throws a fit. i usually have free time whenever my mom needs something, like groceries for instance. i have friends and shit, i promise.” 

eren rolls his tongue and plants another toothpick in his mouth, chewing on it and watching as you curiously observe. to do the honors, he answers before you ask. “cigarette addiction. tryna cut back.” 

“makes sense.” 

“how’s about we keep it a secret?"

his tone was firm yet determined as he spoke. he knew it wouldn’t be easy to keep a relationship a secret from the pastor, especially with how overprotective the man was of his daughter. but he was willing to do it, to give you a chance to be happy and not live the way your father demanded. life’s too short, and you’re young and pretty. the thought of sneaking around with you, being your dirty little secret, made his heart thump in excitement. he was never one to play by the rules anyway.

“you mean like . . sneak around?”

“yeah. with your permission, of course.” 

for some reason, his intentions felt sexual. maybe he had heard the rumors and wanted to see what you were like and change that. you’re not a virgin, luckily the person who took it moved out of town therefore it remained a secret from everyone. he’s pretty to look at, nice on the eyes, fairly polite, and a flirt. but, you couldn’t put your finger on it. and if this was going to be a waste of your time, you surely didn’t want to risk your father finding out. 

so, you decline. “i gotta go, i’m sorry. it was nice meeting you though.” 

eren couldn’t help the slight grimace that appeared on his face when you extract your hand to give him a handshake. it felt so formal and . . cold. your dismissive tone and gesture made it seem like you were done, like you were giving up on the possibility of even interacting with him again. he wanted to question you further, but didn’t want to come off as pushy. 

“yeah, same to you.” 

while flashing a final smile, you push your cart around him to head for the check out counter. 

“when can i see you again?!” he shouts across the open market, hands cuffed around his mouth so you hear him loud and clear. 

“around!” 

eren felt a small ache of disappointment at your vague response, but couldn’t help but smile at the frantic pace you left him at. he knew he’d see you again, he’d make sure of it. two weeks passed and the city’s fair was bustling with the townships' people. one they held every year right before halloween. you’d volunteer to help your mom with her candy apple stand, taking any opportunity not to be stuck home studying. 

the county area was picturesque, a perfect example of the serene beauty of rural life. the fields stretched out as far as the eye could see, rolling hills dotted with occasional trees breaking up the endless stretches of greenery. cows and sheep could be seen grazing in the distance, their peaceful presence adding to the tranquility of the setting. the air was clean and crisp, carrying the scent of grass and wildflowers as the sun set into the night. the fair being held was a hive of activity. children running around laughing and excited chatter adding to the general din of the crowds. the smell of food wafted through the air, the scent of funnel cakes and other fried goods mingling with the underlying aroma of hay and dirt. bull rides and horse races occurring. 

eren found himself wandering through the fair, his thoughts preoccupied as he looked around. he didn’t really feel like playing games or participating in activities right now, he just wanted to clear his mind. but as he strolled past the laughing crowds of people, he paused, noticing a familiar figure nearby. his heart skipped a beat as he recognized you, and a small jolt of excitement coursed through him. your dressed in dark blue low rise affliction jeans that were flared towards the bottom along with a matching vest top and black western boots. a plain black cowboy hat atop of your head. your hairstyle changed completely the last time he saw you. it’s longer, reaching the middle of your back in soft, curly bora bora braids. you looked beautiful. straight out of a dream. a magazine even. 

the wind blows roughly, and from where he stood he could smell the gourmand of your perfume. he stopped only a few feet from you, shoving his hands in his pockets in an attempt to look casual. despite the outward appearance of coolness, his heart was beating fast against his chest, a mixture of anticipation and nervousness coursing through his veins. he hoped you’d be happy to see him again, but he also couldn’t shake the fear that you might reject him. . . again. 

you were stationed at a small booth, an array of freshly made candy apples neatly lined up for sale. the aroma of sweet, sticky apples mixed with the sugary coating filled the air. a woman who stood beside you who stole your entire face, or more-like you stole hers, taking orders from customers, dipping each apple into the thick, red coating before handing it over with a smile. as he drew closer to you, he plastered a careless smile on his face, trying to appear nonchalant. he raised a hand in greeting, waving at you casually.

“hey, what a coincidence.” 

catching his attention, the glint in your eyes reads more than your face does, discreetly giving flirty while your smile is faint. you’re stunned to see him, in fact. briefly eyeing your mother before speaking. “oh, hi! um. . . didn’t catch your name before.” 

“oh, uh. it’s eren. yeager. eren yeager.” 

he felt a slight flush of embarrassment as he said his name. he couldn’t believe he’d forgotten to even introduce himself when he’d first met you. he’d been so eager to get to know you, to convince you to give him a chance, that he’d completely forgotten to mention his own name.

“right, how are you?” 

“uh, good. yeah, i'm good.” 

“are you here with family?” 

“nah, i’m here with some friends. they’re wandering off somewhere,” he says. “are you? is your father here?” 

“he isn’t, actually. i just volunteered to help my mom out with her stand!”

eren’s smile grew just a fraction bigger at your response. he was silently grateful to whatever divine entity was watching over him for keeping your father from being here. it gave him a chance to talk to you freely. 

“is that so? so you’re not being watched over right now?”

“i’m twenty, i don’t need to be watched.”

“point taken,” he purses his lips, eyes trailing over to your mother who was clearly ear-hustling. eren decides to introduce himself. “how you doin’, ma’am. it’s a pleasure meeting you.”

“oh, hello!” your mother smiled back, turning her body fully to take in his sudden attention. she’s just a smaller version of you, same pretty face now slowly wrinkling with time. gray kinky curly hair that grazes her shoulders. she’s dressed in a long navy blue dress painted with yellow daises, a white apron draped around her neck. she smiles at eren’s charming demeanor. “are you a friend of my daughter's?” 

he gave a small nod. "yes, that's right.” 

you could tell your mother scrutinized him for a moment, taking in his appearance. she could tell he was well-groomed and well-spoken, but she also had a watchful eye for any potential troublemakers. she glanced over at you, noting the way you were watching the interaction between the two of them, and then glanced back at eren.

“well it’s nice to meet you. i don’t believe you gave me your name,” she nodded in acknowledgment, her gaze still appraising him. 

“apologies. i’m eren yeager, ma’am.” 

she took in his name and the way he presented himself, weighing him silently in her mind. she was clearly being protective, trying to figure out if he was a suitable friend for you or not. you sigh deeply, twirling your fingers anxiously. eren notices. 

“ah, so you’re the eren i’ve heard about. the troublemaker.” 

“ma. .” you eye her, as if telling her not to start. 

he smiled innocently, a small hint of embarrassment coloring his expression. he didn't think he was quite as bad as the rumors might’ve made him out to be, but he also knew that he wasn't exactly the most picture-perfect person. 

“troublemaker, huh? didn’t know i was known for that. i can tell you that i'm the sweetest person you’ll know if that eases you.” 

“hm,” your mother squints suspiciously, a small giggle, surprising to you at least, coming from her. you blink at her, brows furrowing. does she find him sweet? “aren’t you charming. i hope you stand by your word.” 

this was becoming awkward for you. given the way you were raised and the household you grew up in, your mother was always the sweet one. stern when needed, but for the most part she let you be your own person. she still had heavy concerns for the people you chose to surround yourself with. and a man wasn’t exactly something she’d be ecstatic with. but with her sickness, and unknowing of the time she had left, she’d let her guard down to see you happy. if he were to break your heart, it’d only be a lesson you’d have to learn on your own. 

you remove your sight off of the pretty boy before you, the stand quieting down from attraction to hold her shoulder endearingly. “mama, would it be okay if i stepped away for a bit? just to talk.”

“just for a bit, alright? and make sure you’re only talking,” she says, throwing eren a warning glare. you groan, titling your head annoyingly. 

eren nodded in understanding, silently vowing not to do anything that would give your mother a reason to get between you two. the last thing he needed was a scolding from a protective parent, especially one as dedicated as yours. he already had to potentially worry about your father. he gave your mother a reassuring smile, hoping to ease her worry just a bit. “don’t worry, ma'am. we’re just going to head to the hoedown for a dance.” 

you shoot him a look, dancing sounds different from talking. he smirks. 

“alright, fine. but you be back before ten, okay? no funny business.” 

shaking your head, you give her a peck on the cheek. “promise mama. thank you.” 

“mhm hmm.” 

she watches eren step aside as you remove your apron, maneuvering around the stand as he elongates his arm with a gentle ‘after you’, the two of you strolling away, but not before you turn to look back, giving her a grateful yet giddy smile. your mother chuckles, waving and smiling back, her heart warming at the sight of eren reaching to hold your hand that you hesitated to take before giving in. she couldn’t help but think this was going to be trouble. 

“she seems nice,” eren mutters, a grin tugging at the corner of his mouth. 

you can’t help but roll your eyes. “yeah, she’s very sweet. just can be a bit overprotective.” 

“it’s good you have parents that care for you like that,” he replied, an almost sad tone in his voice. 

"yeah, they. . they're cool," you say, faltering slightly as you try to find the right words. “what about yours?” 

you look up at eren, trying to catch his eyes, but he's staring straight ahead, his jaw set and his expression closed off. it’s clear that he doesn't want to dive too deep into it, but you can't help but wonder what could've happened to make him react like this. he clears his throat uncomfortably, protectively holding you close as he guides you through the crowd. it makes your heart jump. 

“dad isn’t the best.” 

“. . oh.” 

the ranch slowly comes into view, the sounds of music thrumming louder as you approach. there’s a large, open space filled with people dressed in their best western attire, a sense of excitement and nervousness overtaking you. eren leads you through to make your way towards the center of the ranch, where the dancing and festivities are already in full swing. the music is lively and upbeat, couples twirling and spinning across the makeshift dance floor. others chugging down drinks at the bar. 

“you w’na show me how you move?” there’s a certain look in his eye, something else that you can't quite identify. his confidence is infectious. 

the crowds contagious, and it’s clear that everyone is having a great time. but you can’t help but fidget at the thought of dancing with someone you’re extremely attracted to. who smelt like patchouli, dressed in all black with tan, slightly roughed up cowboy boots. who’s smile is as bright as the moon, chocolate long hair making him look like the prettiest prince. it felt like a date. and technically, this would be your very first one. which, now that you’re thinking about it, is probably why your mom looked at you the way she did. 

you cower, biting your lip. “um, i . . can’t dance. at least the way they are.” 

eren raises his brow at your declaration. “really? hm.” 

you swallow when eren’s hand pulls you a little closer by your hip, gently resting there to guide you into position. "don't worry. i’ll lead, and you just follow. it’s not rocket science, right?"

“okay.” 

he starts to move, slowly guiding you into a basic step. despite your lack of knowledge, you try your best to keep up with him, your eyes glancing down at your feet every now and then out of fear of tripping. eren notices your hesitation and gives a small laugh. he keeps his arm around your waist, making sure you don't falter.

"relax. you’re doing fine. stop looking at your feet so much. you’re going to fall if you keep it up.” 

“sorry,” you giggle, your initial nerves starting to fall off as you let him guide you. 

he spins you around gracefully, his hand still firmly holding you in place. you're starting to get the hang of it, your body slowly moving in time to the music. the expression on eren’s face is a mix of amusement and pride; it's clear he's enjoying teaching you to dance. as the music changes to a slightly faster beat, he picks up the pace a bit, twirling you around with practiced ease. his steps are confident, his grip firm yet comfortable. you find yourself actually enjoying the experience, laughing at your own clumsy attempts to keep up with him. his smile widens, his eyes shining with a playful glint as he watches you. amused by your honest attempts of catching up. 

the music slows down eventually, and now plays a soft melody that has couples pulling each other closer to slow dance romantically. rolling your lips inward, you beam up at him with a soft chuckle. i’ll be by edwin mccain playing, and it happened to be one of your favorite songs. the moment becomes intimate, and eren makes a move to rest both hands on your lower back to pull you even closer so your chest touches his. the warmth from his body onto yours gives you goosebumps. it gets more romantic when he places your arms on his shoulder, your hands interlocking while his eyes lock onto yours. bodies swaying slowly with the melodious tune.

“don’t know if i told you how pretty you are.”

you can feel a flutter in your chest at the unexpected compliment. you turn your eyes away from him, a small smile playing on your lips as you try and hide your reaction. you can feel the warmth rising in your face, and you have a feeling he notices it too. “and i told you that you say that to all the girls.”

you’re unsure what switched, but his face grows calm, studying your face intently, hugging you closer as if you’d slip away. that makes you alert. “so . . your mother thinks i’m trouble. i’m not sure what you’ve heard about me. we do live in a small town so shit gets around, including rumors. but, what i’m worried about is how you perceive me.” 

the tone in his voice catches you off guard, his eyes fixed on yours with an almost vulnerable expression. “um, i haven’t heard anything about you to be honest. i don’t really stick my nose in drama, or the bullshit older folks gossip about. clearly, my mom knows, and i’ve heard something minor about your father. . i just — don’t want things like that to cloud my judgment of you. i’d wanna get to know you from you.”

he swallows, trying to contain his thankfulness. “seriously?” 

“yeah, i mean . .” you shrug shyly. “people don’t necessarily have many nice things to say about me or my family apparently. i guess you could say we’re two peas in a pod.” 

“outcasts,” eren prys in a small joke. 

“complicated, whatever. misconceptions everyone makes when they don’t know shit. if i get to know you, and get what i think we want to get from each other, and it turns out to be great or goes completely to shit? then that’s for me to decide when i’m ready.” 

“you’re absolutely right,” he sighs. “i fuckin’ hate this town sometimes. i’m twenty-three ‘n i feel like i'm stuck here. i just wanna run away and start a new life.” 

“i feel the same,” you weakly smile, thoughts flashing around in your head. “this doesn’t feel like home anymore. the community is perfect exterior-wise, but deep down everyone’s a little demented. and believe it or not, my life is miserable. my father’s too overbearing, my mom's sick. they have these high expectations of me, like going to college and honoring the family’s name. but, i’m starting to realize it’s not what i want anymore. i’m only doing it to please them. my father legit made me take a year off just to make sure i’m fully prepared for college.”

“has your father always been strict like that?” eren switches with you as more people make way on the floor, facing south now. the star lights hung on the ceiling setting the mood as more love music played. 

“since i was a kid, yeah. he’s always had these values he believed we should uphold. ‘keeping’ the families guidance, child’ he would say,” eren watches you chuckle dryly, his jaw clenching. “often times i wonder why my mother married someone like him when she’s the complete opposite. i’m guessing he was different when they were younger. sometimes i think i ruined their love.” 

“don’t think that, ꒰♡꒱,” hearing your name come from him made you squeeze his hand tighter, oddly feeling comforted. “whatever problems they have aren’t because of you. they decided to bring you into this world, therefore it’s their job to raise you to be the best you can be. and i think you’re great, and you can think for yourself and do whatever you want with your life.” 

“thank you, eren.” 

“mhm,” eren searches your face continuously, memorizing every detail of expression. for future notes. “do you think he’s so hard on you because he never got the opportunities you have? or ‘cause, you know, you’re his only girl?” eren asks. 

instantly, you nod. “yeah, that’s definitely it. he’s afraid to make a mistake. granted, he’s made a few already. no parent is perfect, but it’d be nice if he’d see me as the adult i am now and not just his baby girl. or perceive me as this sweet little church girl whose only values in life are to please her parents and have awards to hang in the house to boast about when we get visitors.” 

“that’s gotta be hard, i’m sorry.” 

“it’s okay. i’d also be the first in my family to attend college. i got offered a scholarship to brown, which is why he has me studying till i bleed. figuratively, of course.” 

“wow, an ivy league. that’s big.” 

“thanks, i’m a genius,” you roll your eyes sarcastically. your hands drop from his neck, entwining your right hand with his left, eren wrapping his arm around your waist as you two dance that way. “your hands are really soft.” 

“all that butter i be churnin’,” he cackles. his face grows serious once more, and yet again you’re unable to read him. “listen, so . . i w’na tell you that i really am drawn to you. i like you, ‘n i’d like to get to know you. who knows, maybe one day we can run away together from our lives here, some cliché shit like that.” 

“i . . yeah. i really wanna get to know you, too.”

“ooh, you likin’ me?” he flirts. 

you can't help but give him a small smile, your cheeks flushing slightly. this lovesick feeling you get around him was something you’d only read about in novels hauled up in your bedroom to escape reality. it felt nice. 

"maybe i am. what if i am?"

"i like the sound of that," he replies, his voice a soft murmur just above your ear. "i like it a lot, actually."

you can feel the heat radiating from his body, the closeness making your heartbeat quicken. you try to tell yourself that it's just the dance, just the music, that's making you feel this way, but deep down, you know it's more than that. something about eren, something about the way he's looking at you right now, is stirring up feelings you haven't felt before.

“you know," he says, his voice low and intimate, "would it be too early for me to ask to kiss you?”

and that followed up with more forbidden kisses. the two of you tried to see each other four days out of the week, of course, sunday’s being off limits. you’d run to the market for your mother and spend most of your time at eren’s farm feeding the animals and helping him work. making up an excuse when your mother asked why you took so long. the two of you decided it was best to keep your relationship private from both your mother and father until the time was right. there are nights when you would sneak out when your parents were sleeping to make out in the back of his pickup truck under the stars. 

play fighting in the lake, writing each other love letters, running into his arms whenever you saw him while he spun you around and held you tight. every moment spent with him felt like a novel. every kiss feels like a risk, every touch like a secret act of rebellion. living a double life pretending to be just friends. the intimacy of stolen moments you share is like a secret language, a bond forged by the very secrecy that threatens to keep you apart. a month into the relationship, eren surprised you with a date at the same ranch where you shared your first dance. decorating the back of his truck with blankets, pillows, and tons of snacks for a drive-in movie casting on the back of the ranch. he made love to you for the first time that night. 

pastor kain and most of the god-fearing parents in this town knew that eren had a reputation for being rowdy and a sweet talker with the girls. he’s not necessarily someone they’d see their daughter for. and eren will admit he’s made some poor decisions in life, but that didn’t make up for who he was deep inside. nobody knew him. they only knew the surface level of what was spoken of him and his family. the yeager's. eren practically runs the farm that’s in his mother’s name, working his ass off every day while his father wastes himself in heavy liquor on the living room couch. he could’ve left a long time ago, but his attachment to his mother and what she built refused to let him pull away. 

his father made a few public appearances that tarnished their family name further. altercations with good people in town for giving him dirty looks or speaking with ill intent on his son. a father forever, but a horrible dad through and through. his reputation already ruined eren’s. a lot of people assumed he’d be exactly like his father; a drunk, and an abuser. his mother going without peace in a horrible fight between the two causing her heart attack. eren hates that he can’t let him go, having a few nasty fist fights himself. maybe he’s hoping he’d get better one day and be someone. but that was far from what will happen. 

eventually, you and eren sneaking around had to end when word got out about it through your father’s church; an older woman calling you a slut and stating that you’ll be no good dealing with a yeager. it’s clear they were truly disliked in this town full of idiots and sinners themselves. ‘holier than thou, up their asses, pretentious dicks!’ is what eren had to say about it. you and your father had one of the worst arguments of your life. a total scream fest when he found out. 

eren sat outside in his truck, anxiously bouncing his leg, eventually exiting to pace around on your porch. you come out with tears streaming down your face, eyes red and puffy. eren falls apart, cooing ‘awe, baby’ before embracing you into a tight hug, his strong arms burying your face into the warmth of his chest. 

“he just doesn’t understand. i don’t get why he doesn’t understand,” you choke on your sobs, eren brushing a hand down the back of your head, kissing it after. 

“let me talk to him,” eren suggests, and instantly you’re disagreeing, backing away and trembling. 

“no, eren. i told you, nothing we can say will get through to him. he’s fuckin’ hopeless!” 

“kain, stop it!” your mother’s frantic voice could be heard shouting at your father from inside, glass being thrown out of anger. 

the blood flows through eren’s veins viscerally, an intense feeling settling within him, bringing back memories of his own mother. the booming voices of his father and items being tossed, knocked down, or torn. without another word, he’s rushing into your home intending to set things straight. you panic, following his lead, unaware of what he is capable of when angry. you’ve never seen him on that level before. you knew him well enough to know that he wouldn’t put his hands on your parent, and he was respectful to show proper communication. 

“eren!” your voice croaks, tailgating him as he approaches your father’s office where the commotion ensues. 

“he’s corrupting our child! why can’t you see that?!” 

eren stands tall, pulling you behind him protectively as he meets pastor kain’s accusing glare with unwavering determination. 

“who told you to step foot into my home, boy?” pastor kain grits, your mother standing idly beside him, pain wretched over her face. your lips begin to tremble, hating seeing her that way. you never wanted this to be the outcome. you just wanted to love this man. why should you be punished for that? 

“corrupting her?” eren chooses to ignore his statement and cut to the main issue. “sir, with all due respect, it’s not your decision to say who she can ‘n cannot be with. i have no intent to hurt her, which is exactly what you’re doing right now. we've made choices based on what's best for us, for our future. ‘n while those choices may differ from what you had planned, they are ours to make.”  

“and who gave you permission to include yourself into my daughter's plans?” the man snarled, eyeing you as you sob behind eren aggressively. your cries paining eren’s heart. you were too broken to stand up for yourself right now. feeling like you’ve been doing that for your entire existence. it felt safe to have eren handle things for you. 

“she did, because she’s an adult and i will marry her whether you give us your blessing or not,” his voice rises, tinged with a hint of defiance. the word marriage drives your father into madness. “i will never apologize for loving your daughter, for wanting to build a life with her. if that makes me a bad decision in your eyes, then so be it. but i refuse to let you dictate the course of our happiness.” 

his gaze shifted towards you, his eyes filled with a mixture of sorrow and disappointment. the tension hung heavy in the air, the weight of their disagreement pressing down upon them. yet amidst the conflict, there was an undercurrent of love and concern, a testament to the complex bond that existed between father and daughter. your father holds a hand to his heart as if it’s torn, strolling around his brown desk to take a seat. 

“you’re going to let him speak for you, ꒰♡꒱. speak to me like this? there’s no respect for me anymore?” 

your sniffles are loud, removing your face from the middle of eren’s broad back to stand your ground, elevating your head and clutching his hand tighter. “i truly don’t know what else i can say to you, daddy. i’m not fond of the life you have planned for me. i will always be your daughter, but i can’t and will not be this little girl you want to have control over. i am an adult, therefore you have to treat me as such. i no longer want to attend college because of my own decision. it was always your dream, not mine. eren had nothing to do with these transitions. i am allowed to love whomever i please.” 

the room falls silent as your parents stare at you, your mother placing her hands over her chest with loving despair. she herself has made multiple attempts to try and change her husband's point of view, but nothing surpasses. eren glances at you, eyes shining with adoration and protectiveness. 

“it’s not that i won’t let you live your life. it’s that i don’t approve of who you’re trying to give your life to. what can he do for you?” 

eren feels a sense of inferiority. “i may not come from wealth, but i am not a man of indolence. your daughter is a remarkable woman who deserves everything she wishes for. she knows her own mind ‘n heart, ‘n she's chosen me. ‘n i love her for that. i’m not belittling your concerns, but i can not, in good conscience, abandon the woman i love’ needs. we may not fit the mold you've envisioned, but i love her and will continue to whether you disapprove or not. i will provide for her, take care of her. she never has to lift a finger while with me.” 

pastor kain’s face contorted in anguish, his shoulders slumping as if the weight of the world bore down upon him. he looked at you, then at eren, his eyes searching for some glimmer of understanding, some shred of compromise.

“oh lord, have mercy on us all,” with a heavy sigh, he turned away, his voice barely audible as he spoke. “you’ve made your choice clear, ꒰♡꒱. you’re choosing to leave the only home you've ever known, turnin' your back on the only family you've ever had. and for what? a fleeting romance with a man who can't even provide you with a stable future? someone rowdy with a poor excuse of a father? a flirt who can’t handle his greed for women? you want me to be happy for you? for this? he ain’t good for you, baby girl. and i will stand by that for as long as i breathe.” 

that’s when all of you equally realized that no matter what was said, his opinion will remain one sided. admitting defeat as a whole. anything that was said completely flew over his head, and only his view mattered. it’s narcissistic, and bizarre. eren was baffled, in fact. 

the waves of pain crash down on you, wishing he would just understand you, and be happy for you. to approve and give his blessings. to tell you that the man you’re in love with is good for you. eren holds you as your body grows weak, almost falling over. it’s clear the effect this had on you, and he fucking hated it. 

“i just want you to . . you don’t even k-know him.” 

he shook his head, his eyes glistening with unshed tears. “i fear for your soul, my dear.” 

i fear for your soul. that haunted your dreams like nothing else ever had. it was by far the vilest thing you’d ever heard your father say to you. it made you cry for days on end. breaking your heart over and over again. weakening since the moment you’d packed your suitcase and said goodbye to your mother. you no longer saw your father as family. giving her a heartfelt embrace and kissing your home goodbye. four months later, your mother passed away. regret ached at you for not seeing her as much after you left with eren. you’d seen her only a few times after the horrible fight, spending the day with her as she gave eren an extreme apology as well as her approval. she prayed you’d forgive your father, to give him grace. 

the last time you saw your father was at your mother’s funeral. and the look on his face remained the same towards eren; disgust. you still loved your father a great deal, but the respect no longer resides. you’d comfort him, check on him occasionally, but keep your distance to protect your peace. after your mother received a beautiful burial, you continued your future with eren. marrying in secrecy two months later. in the aftermath of loss, the two of you found solace in each other. amidst the grief and chaos, your love became a beacon of hope, a reminder that even in the darkest times, there could still be beauty. so, in a quiet ceremony surrounded by close friends, you vowed to spend the rest of your lives together. 

as you exchanged rings and sealed your union with a kiss, the weight of the world seemed to lift from your shoulders. for a moment, nothing else mattered except the love you shared, the future you would build together. a good thing that came out of this was eren’s father getting clean and giving him a letter from his mother he’d kept hidden on his own accord. a title for land she’d purchased just for him to do what he pleased. eren’s father held down the farm while eren decided to build your dream home on the new land. and he stood by his word. 

it was hard for eren to forgive his father, but he appreciated that he wanted to be better. it’d never bring his mother back, nor heal the bruises on his heart, but it was something. once he built this home for the two of you, he’d never have to see him again. it seemed like both of you were running away from your father’s. it was scary how somewhat similar your situations were. you became acquainted with his father out of respect, helping with the farm to pass time as eren focused on building the house with his friends. it helped you clear your mind surprisingly, always adoring animals and gardening. it’s something you wanted to do once the house was ready as a hobby. 

some days were really hard, grieving not only the death of your mother but the separation from your father. you felt bad for the many nights you cried in eren’s arms about it. luckily he didn’t invalidate your feelings. he constantly reassured you that everything you felt was natural, and he had no problem comforting you on your lowest days. and that if anyone understood the pain of losing a mother, it’d be him. he truly was your angel. who would’ve thought a man you’d met at a market one random day would be the one you’d spend the rest of your life with. 

eren spent an entire year and a half building a charming little cottage nestled in a scenic countryside setting out of town, about an hour. it’s a cozy, quaint structure with a warm, homey feeling. the exterior is made of white wood, front adorned by a wrap-around porch, blue shutters, and a few flowers in pots. the windows are large and welcoming, bringing in natural light and a lovely view of the surrounding landscape. he’d built your dream kitchen, tall windows overlooking the garden. a bathroom with a clawfoot tub and double sinks. and a library so you could read and write. he did it all. 

you stood beside him, hand resting on the small of his back as you surveyed your new home. 

"this is perfect," you whispered, voice filled with emotion as tears well in your eyes. “it’s everything i’ve ever wanted, eren. thank you.” 

eren turned to you, his eyes shining with love and pride. he wraps his arms around your waist, pulling you close as he buried his face in the crook of your neck. the scent of your perfume mingled with the earthy aroma of nature filling his senses with comfort.

“i meant what i said, i'd do anything to make you happy,” he murmured, breath tickling your skin. he tilts your chin up, gaze locking with yours as he brushes a stray curl behind your ear, the tears falling down your brown cheeks. “you’re the most important thing in my life, and now we get to share this space, these memories, everything. together."

‎‎               𐦍

a storm is raging outside on the day of your anniversary, and it only raises your anxiety for your husband currently working in this weather. you’d set up the dining area to surprise eren, spending hours in the kitchen to perfect the tastiest meal. you’d always be sure to welcome him home with a good meal after hard labor. talks of the storm have been on a loop, playing on the living room tv repeatedly. one of your worst fears was a natural disaster. for it to possibly happen today of all days felt like a big joke. 

you’ve been trying to keep your mind off it, praying for eren’s safety while anxiously nibbling at your cross necklace. you’ve tried to contact him a few times, but gotten no response. assuming he was busy, you left it alone, knowing he’d get back to you as soon as he was available. service was probably terrible out there. within the next moment, as you set the oven to three sixty-five and placed the round cake pan in, the sound of the front door swinging open alerts you. you hear that familiar sound of house keys jangling, and your heart nearly combusts at the realization that your husband made it home. 

the oven mitts come off, and immediately you’re bolting towards the living room; a sweet scent of roses wafting up from the extreme wind blowing into the house and the bouquet in his hand. “where you at, baby? i’m home!” 

his voice calling out to you makes you giggle, echoing through the warm house. a few seconds later, you emerged from the archway, a smile beaming on your pretty face as you ran into his arms, eren chuckling as he caught you and your legs wrapped around his waist. kissing at his face in relief.

“baby, i was so, so nervous. the storms gettin’ worse by the day. i thought you were stuck somewhere. you weren’t answering your phone ‘n i got so scareddd,” you bury your face in the crook of his tatted neck, nearly sobbing as you clutch him tight. 

it’s true, the weather was horrible. trees knocking down, power going out, roads blocked. it happened out of the blue. they’re saying a hurricane is a high possibility. why you’re finding out last minute? who fucking knows. unfortunately, he was on the clock today working at the plant, his highlighted yellow vest adorned on his shoulders as he stepped himself out of his dirty timberlands. luckily they were collectively told to head home early for safety reasons. 

“oh, darlin’, i’m alright. my body’s intact,” he kisses your cheek. “i told you to stop watchin’ the news. it makes you more sensitive.” 

he sets you down slowly, your bare feet hitting the ground while you pout up at him. your curls were tousled as if you'd just rolled out of bed, but you looked beautiful, breath catching in his throat actually. especially dressed up in this dark red two-piece set. cute ruffled shorts and a skimpy bra accentuating your every curve in a way that left little to the imagination. the swell of your ass, hips, and thickness of your thighs that touch swallows the material salaciously. your skin is smooth, always. scented with dewberries and magnolia. 

“fuck, baby,” he breathed, voice low and husky as his hand slips down to grip your ass, spanking you hard as you squeak. “i like this on you. you look pretty.” 

“thank you, baby,” your eyes sparkle with affection. “i wanted today to be special. i made dinner and all. but the storm had me shittin’ myself.” 

“that’s why i gotcha these before the flower shop closed. well, i ordered ‘em ahead of time ‘n miss valerie let me pick ‘em up,” eren hands you the assortment of flowers in his hand, blooming red roses and cream calla lilies swarmed in black wrapping paper. you take them, adoringly jutting out your lower lip more. “happy anniversary, sweetheart.”

“you’re such a sweetie, rennie,” you lay your chin on his chest, leaning into him while looking up at him with puppy eyes. “thank you.” 

“mhm hmm,” eren loses focus already, clutching the side of your face before leveling his neck lower to capture your lips in a searing kiss, bottom lip dropping to enclose your mouth with his. 

the kiss is slow and filled with passion, eyes shutting in sync as you moan from his taste. he smelt like he’d done hard labor and the musk of his cologne he’d spritzed at six in the morning, but you loved it. every time. your fantasies just get more disgusting as you age. the heavy toolbelt that’s sliding down his hips, the white crewneck, slightly stained with patches of oil almost eating up his muscles, showcasing his tatted right arm and neck. wedding band around his finger as he holds your face to aggressively kiss your smaller frame. he’s forever hot. 

the savory aroma of dinner wafted up from the oven, momentarily breaking the spell. with a groan, he reluctantly pulled back, eyes never leaving yours. "i smell food.” 

"well, since you've gone through all that trouble, i showed my appreciation properly." 

as you drag him towards the dining room, his gaze falls upon the beautifully set table, the flickering candlelight casting a romantic glow across the darkly lit room. confetti littered the surface, a whimsical touch that added to the celebratory atmosphere. a chilled bottle of wine sat in a silver bucket. he watched you slip on your oven mitts to retrieve the food you were keeping warm. eren surveys the spread, the tantalizing aroma of perfectly steamed lobster claws glistened with butter, while the filet mignon looked pink and juicy. his stomach growls with anticipation, only eating the lunch you packed for him earlier in the day containing birria ramen and pork dumplings. 

“damn, you always do so well. good job, baby,” he marveled, heart swelling with admiration for your thoughtfulness. his praises making your face heat up. he does it so much you’re not sure if he realizes how it makes you feel. "everything looks so good. let me jus’ shower real quick ‘n we can dig in, yeah?” 

“noo,” you protest. eren arches a brow. with a flourish, you poured two glasses, the rich red liquid swirling seductively in the crystal bowls. “love you like this.” 

eren cracks a smirk, sucking his teeth in amusement. “you’re so dirty, girl.” 

"you like it,” you raise your glass in a silent salute. “come eat. i need you thick.” 

“shut it.” 

you scream as he hits your ass playfully, sneaking behind you to kiss your cheek while you snort, eren pulling out your chair like a gentleman so you can sit, soon taking his adjacent to you. for the next hour the two of you enjoyed each other's company, laughing in faces, getting tipsy, love bites and sensual touching . . the usual. eren thanked you repeatedly for how good the food was, soothing old-school rnb playing soundly low in the background while he washed the dishes as you spread chocolate icing on the cake you baked. it was a moment of simple domesticity, a glimpse into the everyday life you’d built together. once the last plate was put away, your husband dried his hands and turned to face you, a mischievous grin spreading across his face as he watched you sip your wine while you spread the icing spatula over the cake, humming to the tune. 

slowly, he approaches you, coming behind you and planting kisses along your neck, your hand dropping the spatula while your eyes falter shut. his kisses are filthy, his hands groping you to push your ass back onto the outline of his dick now hard in his jeans for a while. he slowly trails a hand up your throat to clutch, pushing you against the counter nearly bending you over fully. 

you moan, rubbing your ass back on him as his hands roam over your body, a wine glass in your hand as you close your eyes and rest your head on his shoulder. you reached beside yourself, fingers trailing lightly down his forearm where his hand slips in between your thighs, groaning on your skin as he rocks his erection against the shape of your ass. a delicate gasp falls from you, setting your wine glass down and hooking your arm behind yourself to hold his head in place. 

“c’mere,” eren licks his lips, your skin prickling with heat as he guides you closer to him by your abdomen, spreading your thighs further apart to slot his fingers into your ruffled bloomers. 

his teeth nip at your earlobe while he grunts and rolls the pads of his rough fingers against your clit, a cute sound emitting from your mouth. your jaw is agape, eren hissing when you tug at his hair the minute he’s sliding his middle fingers into your pussy, stretching you open as his thumb strums your clit, tugging your bloomers down to your knees with the hook of his thumb. instantly, you’re falling apart. moans breaking out in short whimpers and high gasps, grinding into his palm. eren arches over you, free hand palming the countertop which your hand rests over to grab for leverage, wedding bands touching, his breath heavy on your flushed skin.  

"there we go, take it baby,” he murmurs, his voice heavy with desire and encouragement. he leans in to capture your lips in a slow, sensual kiss, his tongue delving into your mouth to mingle with yours. 

“babyy,” you’re whimpering, his fingers long and entirely deep inside of you. the loud squelch of your pussy fueling him. 

eren’s fingers scissor and curl to hit that perfect spot inside you, your moans growing louder, hips rocking to match his rhythm. the dual stimulation of his fingers fucking you while he thumbs at your clit has your body trembling with anticipation, the wine in both of your systems heightening every feeling. the desperate clench around his fingers only increases his efforts, pumping his fingers faster and applying more pressure to your sensitive bud.

the sudden insistent knocking at the door shattered the intimate mood. you froze, heart pounding in your chest as your eyes shot open to glance at him, a mix of annoyance and concern etched on his features as you watch his jaw clench. he wants to ignore it, but the worry on your face tells him not to. he’s groaning. 

“the hell could that be?" he muttered under his breath, your mind racing with possibilities. it wasn't uncommon for neighbors to stop by, but during a severe storm? you’d think everyone would be hauled up at home. 

groaning yourself, you fix yourself up, scrunching your face from the uncomfortable feeling of wetness sticking between your thighs. wanting to stomp in irritation, you go to grab a soapy towelette as eren’s too busy licking you clean off his fingers while shaking your head and wiping his hand. 

“do you think it could be the county police? maybe they’re checking to see if everyone’s safe,” you say, going to search for one of eren’s oversized hoodies to toss over your head and cover your body appropriately. 

“could be. i heard a few people’s had their power knocked out. i’m hoping we won’t have to evacuate.” 

eren takes a deep breath, steeling himself for whatever interruption awaited. with a reluctant sigh, he strode towards the front door once you were ready. as he unlocked it, he made sure to securely have a tight grip on it since the wind was ridiculous out. the last thing the two of you expected was to see a familiar face awaiting, going into shock as you see your father standing on the other side, his gaze sweeping over eren before settling onto you. 

“pastor,” eren greeted him curtly, trying to keep his tone neutral despite the annoyance simmering beneath the surface. he steps aside, letting the man inside so he wouldn’t get knocked over by the raging winds. “come in if you must.” 

eren shuts the door, standing tall next to you. he’s confused why he’s here, hoping his visit wasn’t a thinly veiled attempt to criticize his relationship with you once again. then again, it’s been three years since he’s personally seen him. of course you kept him in your life, just extremely briefly. you stand beside eren, feeling his tension and bracing yourself for an uncomfortable confrontation. pastor kain’s presence fills the room with an awkward heaviness, and you can almost sense the disapproval radiating off him in palpable waves.

“daddy, what are you doing here?" you ask softly, worry and curiosity inked in your voice. 

as pastor kain stepped further into the house, his eyes roamed the space, taking in the evidence of you and your husband’s shared life together. the cozy living room, adorned with photos of you two, hinted at the love and connection you’d built. the faint scent of the dinner you had not long ago, a reminder of the domestic bliss you’d created.

“i was in the neighborhood and wanted to see my daughter. the storm’s really bad, and i got worried. hopefully i'm not interrupting anything.” 

your eyes soften, smiling faintly. "thank you for doing that. i’m glad you stopped by. but you should be home. why were you out in this weather?” 

“had to drop cherry off at the vet, she ain’t doing too good,” your father frowned, the mention of the dog he’d gotten a while after your mother passed makes you sympathize. 

“oh, i’m sorry to hear that. she gon’ be okay?” 

“can’t say for sure. she been havin’ a lot of stomach problems, uh . .” he quickly clears his throat as if to cover up his pain. you weakly smile, rubbing his arm. 

“hey, no need to explain. i’m prayin’ she’ll be okay. it’s nice to see you, um . . eren and i were just celebrating our anniversary. would you like to join us for dessert?” you gesture towards the kitchen where a decadent chocolate on chocolate cake sits on the counter. 

eren watched pastor kain’s expression closely, gauging his reaction to the invitation. when he hesitated, eren couldn't help but feel a flicker of irritation. 

“sure, why not?" pastor kain replied gruffly, his gaze lingering on the cake before meeting eren’s eyes. "but just a slice, i shouldn't impose."

eren bit back a retort, choosing instead to lead the way to the kitchen. he motions for the two of you to take a seat at the dining table while he cuts a generous portion for each of you. it's silent until he comes back.

“here you go, sir,” eren says, handing him a plate with a warm smile. 

“ ‘preciate you.” 

eren nods formally, leaning against the counter, observing the interaction between you and your father with a mix of curiosity and caution. 

“how’ve you been? i know last time i saw you, you were attending therapy. is that going well?” you ask. 

“it’s been . . difficult," pastor kain admitted, his voice cracking slightly as he set his fork down. he rubbed the back of his neck, a sign of discomfort or perhaps guilt. "losing your mother was a blow, and then dealing with your decision to . . leave home. .” 

he trailed off, gaze drifting to you before returning to meet eren’s eyes. there was a depth of sorrow in his eyes that he hadn't seen before, and for a moment, eren almost felt sorry for the man. the topic of your mother is still hard for you, eren coming over to sit beside you to entwine his fingers with yours to give you comfort. 

“i miss her every day," pastor kain continued, his voice barely above a whisper. your heart aches to hear your father's admission, and you reach out instinctively to lay a comforting hand on his. despite your differences, you know the pain of losing your mother is something you share deeply.

"i miss her too, daddy," you say softly, voice thick with emotion. "every single day. but, she would want us all to be happy, and live life to the fullest. she told me so after . . everything.” 

the thought of the altercation makes you all shift uncomfortably, hating that night. “we both care about you very much. i know things haven't always been easy between us, but . . i hope we can find a way to mend those bridges."

“that’s another thing i’ve been discussing with my therapist,” he sighs. “we talk about that night often, and somehow it still stirs something . . awful in me. though time has passed, i still don't approve of you disappearing with this man while giving me the short end of the stick with only minimal check-ins."

that makes eren flinch, feeling a sting of defensiveness rise within him. clenching his jaw, he stares intently at your father. just waiting for him to really try it. at this point in time, he gave no fucks about respect. eren knows you can stand up for yourself, but he won’t hesitate to set him straight. 

"leaving wasn't easy for me, you know that, as i’ve said before. i loved mom so much, and i didn't want to abandon you. but i also needed to follow my heart and build a life with someone who accepts me for who i am. you’re still upset about us eloping, alright. but that doesn't mean our love is any less real. i mean, of all days, you really chose to do this today?” 

“i’m not saying your love isn’t real,” pastor kain said, his tone softening slightly as he realized he was already upsetting you. it’s something he’s trying to work on. he sighed heavily, running a hand through his gray hair. “i just miss my little girl. the one who used to sit on my lap during sermons, who helped me prepare for sunday mornings. you grew up too fast, baby girl. left me behind. for this man i barely know.” 

your heart clenches at the raw emotion in your father's voice, and you feel tears pricking at the corners of your eyes, getting irritated by your sensitivity. his words still sting, a painful reminder of the distance that has grown between you over the years. eren doesn’t appreciate the way he’s making you feel, easily getting triggered. 

“forgive me for intruding, but i don’t appreciate the disrespect you have towards me or my wife.” eren budges in, his intervention catching you off guard. you face him with wide eyes, silently urging him to tread carefully. while you appreciate his protectiveness, you don't want him to further alienate your father.

"it’s okay, eren," you murmur, placing a calming hand on his chest. he looks at you, his expression unreadable for a moment before crossing his arms over his broad chest.

“no, it’s not okay, ꒰♡꒱,” eren stops you. “i've grown tired of being disrespected 'n judged based on your father's misconceptions of me. you don’t know me because you haven’t tried to get to.” 

a challenge simmers in the dark depths of his eyes as he stares at your father.  “if you truly care about your daughter's happiness, then you should be supporting her choices, not tryin’ to tear them down with your outdated beliefs.”

“with all do respect, eren, she’s still my daughter.”

“actually, no,” eren jumps back in, his jaw clenching, a hint of steel underlying his words. “this is my wife, and this is our house. if you choose not to respect it then you can kindly see yourself outta that door. i don’t understand your mindset when it comes to knockin’ down your daughter's happiness, nor do i understand holdin’ me accountable for shit i did as a stupid kid.”

“that doesn't change the fact that you stole my daughter from me and married her outside of her faith. it goes against everything I've taught her. and you aren't even a christian, it’s not according to god’s plan."

“where is this even coming from?” you scrunch up your face in disgust, eyes piercing at him. “why are you still being like this after all these years?” 

“i’m not tryin’ to cause an argument. i talked to god and realized i should come forward with issues that are bothering me, and find solace. and that’s what i’m doin’.” 

“by still hurting me?” 

“i’ll say it again,” eren cuts back in. “she’s my wife. put aside your religious beliefs and respect that as a man,” eren scoffs. “we may not have married under oath, but it happened. so deal with it.” 

“i would respect you a lot more if you gave my daughter the proper marriage with her family. especially after her mother died. maybe i’d forgive all your other sins. this goes against her family’s unity,” pastor kain snarls. 

“dad, enough,” your eyes squeeze tight. he’s ruining your day. “this is getting out of hand now. .” 

eren pinches the bridge of his nose, ready to swing at this point. "pastor kain, i understand that my past mistakes have given you a reason to doubt me. but i'm not that same reckless kid anymore, clearly. i've worked hard to build this home for us ‘n keep it. everything i’ve done from the moment i met her to now, has been for her. so here’s what’s gon’ happen. you either start respecting your daughter’s choices and accepting me as part of this family, or you can kindly remove yourself from her life. because i won’t tolerate disrespect towards her, especially not in my home.”

as eren speaks, you instinctively reach out and intertwine your fingers with his, feeling the warmth and solidity of his touch. pastor kain’s expression remains stoic, but you sense a crack in the armor of his rigid beliefs. perhaps, just perhaps, eren’s sincerity and your own steadfastness are beginning to chip away at the walls of resistance. 

“and if you can’t accept me, then maybe it’s time for you to reexamine your own faith and values. because the way you’re treating your daughter, i wouldn’t say it’s christian of you at all. so i implore you, for her sake, let go of your preconceived notions.” 

the air goes quiet for a while, eren staring at your father blankly while you gather your thoughts and caress his hand. it doesn’t take long for your father to push back his chair, the wood slightly scraping the floor as he rises up. 

“i apologize, to both of you. truly,” he swallows, bowing his head. “i’ve made plenty of mistakes i’m not proud of. the biggest one running my daughter away from home. i am trying to do better, i am. my old habits seep out unexpectedly. i think deep down my blessings were always with you two, i just have selfish tendencies. i am deeply sorry, eren.” 

eren isn’t sure if this is a facade, or if the man is being genuine. his lips are pressed into a straight line, nodding once but having no more words. he’d accept it, but the matter of if he was willing to change and show proof remained. 

“right,” he smiles weakly. “and i'm sorry to you, ꒰♡꒱. i’ve never meant to hurt you, granted i have many times. i will continue to repent for my sins. and i hope one day you can forgive me. i will let you two enjoy the rest of your day, i'm sorry to intrude.” 

pastor kain gives one more smile to you both before turning his back away and heading towards the front door. you’re frozen in your spot, your heart telling you to bring him back because it wasn’t safe. 

“we can’t let him go,” you turn to eren, anxiousness written all over your face. “eren, it’s really dangerous out there. what if something happens to him?” 

eren sighs, leaning in to kiss your forehead before standing to follow behind him. his hand is on the nozzle of the door before eren’s speaking up, clearing his throat to rid the still pent up animosity. 

“you can stay the night. i won’t let you travel in that storm.” 

pastor kain breathed in. “no, no. it’s completely fine. i’ve already overstayed my wel—”

“i insist,” eren finalizes, blinking slowly. “꒰♡꒱ will lose her shit if you drivin’ in that. you know she’s terrified of storms.” 

a few minutes pass and your father sits on the living room couch with eren making conversation, surprisingly. you can tell your father is trying to get to know him, and being respectful. you zone out for the most part, this day feeling long and getting to you. you decide to fix him a plate of leftover food you had and making everyone hot chocolate to ease the stress. it’s getting extremely late now, almost near midnight and your father grows tired. 

“we can take the sofa. you head upstairs and get comfortable,” you smile at your father, eren glaring down at you as you hook your arm with his.

eren’s jaw tightens slightly at the suggestion, but he quickly masks his irritation with a polite smile. he knows it's the right thing to offer your father the bed, despite his own desires to share a more intimate space with you. the house was built specifically for both of your comfortability since the two of you had long decided kids weren’t for you, being satisfied without. 

"that’s very kind of you, darlin’," eren says, his voice smooth and measured. “i think your father will appreciate that, huh?” 

“mhm hmm,” you nod sheepishly. “there are clean towels and washcloths in the closet by the bathroom. we’ll be down here if you need anything.” 

“think i’ll manage, baby girl. thank you.” 

your father gives you a sweet hug and a delicate forehead kiss before smiling at eren and giving him a handshake. “thank you.” 

“no problem.” 

eren sighs deeply once he’s fully upstairs, grumbling, ‘gotta take a piss’ before he’s heading to the second bathroom around the hall. you gather extra blankets from the coat closet, cutting off the lights while snuggling into the pillow soft couch watching adult cartoons. it’s been a hell of a day, and you wanted nothing more than to ignore the horrible weather outside and sleep next to your man. the white noise of the staticky television nearly has you drifting off to sleep, that is until thirty minutes later you’re woken up by eren sliding next to you.  

as the two of you settle in for the night, eren pulls you close on the cloud white couch, his strong arms enveloping you in a comforting embrace. despite the less-than-ideal circumstances, he whispers softly into your ear, “you alright, sweetheart?” 

you can smell the body wash on his skin, his hair pulled back into a bun as he kisses your cheek and hums, bear hugging you. sighing deeply, you nuzzle your face into his neck, trying to block out the raging rain outside that’s stressing you out on top of current events. “i’m okay. today was really a lot. i’m sorry about that.” 

eren furrows his brows. “now you know you shouldn’t be apologizing for him. he can’t control himself, n’ that’s not your priority. i meant what i said by protecting you from any n’ everybody that brings you negativity. i’m not with that. he needs to respect you, especially in this house.” 

“as well as you,” you bat your lashes up at him, rubbing his chin. “i hate that he talked to you like that. after all this time, i thought he’d change. i knew deep down he still felt some way since he never brings you up when i visit. doesn’t ask me about us . . nothing. i guess it’s a start that he apologized? and made conversation? but to come here saying you w’na check on me, then proceed to disrespect us?” 

eren sighs. “unfortunately, you can’t ever fully change a person. i’ll take the apology, but it’s g’na take a lot more than that for me to even consider him a father in law.” 

you stare longingly at his face. “i am grateful that you stood your ground and protected us. that’s very attractive.” 

eren grins. “you’re my wife, ꒰♡꒱. forever. ima always make sure you come first.” 

graciously, you smile, leaning in to give him a chaste kiss on the lips. “thank you, baby. truly. you’ve been the most beautiful, kindest, loving person in my life. i love that you protect me, take care of me, provide and support me. i love you dearly.” 

“of course, baby. i love you too,” he replies, smudging his nose against yours. “my sweetheart. you mean everything to me. you saved me.” 

“stop,” you frown. “you’re gonna make me cry. yuck.” 

eren nudges his knuckles against your chin with a click of his tongue. “cut that. you’re a strong girl.” 

you hum, turning your head to look outside the window that faces the garden out back, the rain pouring heavier; clouds completely gray in the midnight. it was terrifying, especially hearing the wind beat against the shutters. you squeeze eren closer to you, your nerves getting to you more, goosebumps on your arms. 

“what a helluva anniversary, huh?” eren speaks to distract you, leveling his face over yours to block your view of the outside. you smile at him, knowing he was aware of your fear. 

you tsk, rolling your eyes. “man, from this scary ass weather, to my father’s bullshit . . i’m over it.” 

“hm, over it? already?”

you pucker your lips questionably. “yeah?” 

“it’s not over,” his voice barely becomes a whisper as he leans into you more, lips pressing against yours deeply. 

“eren, i really want to, but we can’t. my dad's upstairs,” you giggle, pushing your face away only for him to grab you and pull you closer to his chest, throwing your left leg over his waist. 

“i don’t care. fuck me.” 

you gasp with a laugh, eyes bulging when you feel his dick hard and heavy on your thigh. “mister yeager, are you naked?” 

“had no choice. my drawls upstairs and i ain’t puttin’ the dirty ones back on.” 

“only ‘cause you wanna touch my coochie,” you laugh, gasping when his fingers begin tugging at your shorts, ass almost slipping out while the rest of his fingers delicately brush along your clothed clit. “w-wait. what if he hears. that’s g’na be so embarrassing.” 

“ain’t he a heavy sleeper?” 

“well, yeah, but—”

“guess you’ll have to train yourself to keep quiet,” he smooches your cheek, smacking your ass hard to tease you, and you lose immediately, moaning loud. he chuckles, your thighs parting to welcome him, mouth agape from the warmth his palms bring, igniting your skin. the blood rushes through you as heat encases your face the instant his hand wraps around your throat, bringing your face closer. 

"didn’t get to finish touchin’ you earlier,” eren breathes heavily, his nose pressing against your neck as his lips glide to your collarbone. “it pissed me off."

“m-me too,” you whine when his thick tongue aggressively licks at your collarbone, a kiss following suit and continuing all over your neck.

"your pussy felt so good on my fingers," eren's hands massage over your thighs, purposely avoiding where you need him most. fingers swallowing the thickness of your thighs and the plush of your ass, smacking to get another reaction out of you. 

"you're teasing," you whimper, rolling your head back while your eyes scroll. “fuck, you know how wet that makes me”. 

" ‘fuckin ‘course i do,” his breath hitches again, moving his face to the other side of your neck, your hand gripping his bicep while grinding your hips to inch closer to his fingers. he tastes your skin again, and it’s lewd, and loud. knowing how sensitive you were there, any intimate sound setting you off.

"stop. teasing." 

eren’s pulling the blankets back, dragging you to stand up and firmly pressing your backside to his chest, just like the position he had you in earlier. staring down at you, he admires the deep red of the set you wore for him. it complements your brown skin perfectly, drawing attention to the fullness of your breasts and the swell of your hips. your thick, curly hair tumbling down your back in soft waves, framing your heart-shaped face and accentuating your plump, inviting lips. he pulls the bloomers completely off, your painted toes stepping out of them, twitching from any touch he gives you. 

“you’re so perfect,” eren whispers, guiding your head back to lie on his chest so you can look up at him, his mouth enclosing around yours to kiss you upside down. his chin holding you still. “you turn me on so bad.”

you bite your lip, looking up at him with hooded eyes as he holds you in place, a strong arm wrapped around you to keep you pinned to his firm chest. the heat of his skin seeps into yours, igniting a fresh spark of desire within you. you can feel his dick pressed against your lower back, evidence of how much he wants you. you shift slightly, grinding yourself subtly back in a silent invitation. your nipples harden under the sheer fabric of the bralette when his hand comes to play with them, straining towards his touch. you part your lips, letting him deepen the kiss as his tongue dances with yours. the taste of you mingles together, a heady aphrodisiac that makes you crave more. you moan softly into his mouth, surrendering yourself completely to the moment and to him.

turning slightly to the side, you detach your lips to spit into your hand, kissing him again as you stroke his dick beside your thigh, his hands embedded into your hips. his dark brows knit, your hand twisting to his liking as he holds your entire face with both hands, groaning low while brushing his lips amongst your own. his teeth go to pull down the strap of your top, latching his mouth onto the skin of your soft tits, jaw widening to suck on the flesh with tenacity.

"can't get over how good this looks on you," eren hums, keeping the other strap on your shoulder for appearance. he spanks your ass again, and you stand up straighter, turning to face him.

“you really like it?” you ask shyly.

his gaze roams over your body with undisguised hunger. “baby, i fuckin’ love it."

it makes your face hotter, slowly twisting in your spot to try to keep your composure. you hated when you felt intimidated by him as if he was some sort of stranger. 

“don’t get shy on me now,” he noticed instantly, cupping your chin before kissing you. “show me that bad girl i know.” 

a coy smile twitches at your lips, eren urging you to hurry with a hand smoothing onto the top of your head as you lower to your knees. he grips your hair dominantly, forcing you to keep your eyes on his. the sight is undeniably godly. he looks almost worn out, shoulders hunched under the weight of a long day's labor, and the marital instinct inside of you wants to make him feel better. his dark hair is mussed, easily falling from the hair tie wrapped in the follicles. there's a rugged attractiveness to his features; the strong jawline, the piercing gaze, the hint of stubble along his chin, the desire in his eyes. scattered across eren’s right arm and neck is a plethora of dark ink, artistically gothic, straight out of a fantasy novel. none of his tattoos had deep meanings. he liked what he wanted and that was all, using his skin strictly as an artist’s canvas. the only one that meant a lot to him was your name tatted across his wrist. 

"tell me to open my mouth." 

eren grunts, your sudden lead stirring something within his abdomen. usually, he’s the one telling you what to do. "open your mouth. now." 

your lips part, obeying without hesitation. "stick your fingers in." 

eren lays two fingers on your soft tongue, slowly stroking until he’s reaching the back of your throat to build up more saliva. you moan in approval, eyes watering but still maintaining eye contact. eren’s brows are knitted, dick hanging from the weight of it. he’s bending forward, spitting on your tongue and prepping your mouth, groaning gravely. you pull your mouth back from his fingers, salvia dripping down your chin. 

“you always do that,” he chuckles, the roughness of it making you squeeze your thighs. 

“ ‘cause you’re nasty,” you smirk, rolling your eyes. eren playfully does the same. “take my head and put my mouth where you want it." 

“fuck, you’re so good at that,” eren comments, gripping your chin to give you a chaste kiss. “talkin’ so pretty.” 

he keeps a firm hold on your scalp, curls tangled within his rough hands as he steadily guides you toward his dick, eyeing you darkly, back slightly bent so he can catch the view of your nose touching his stomach. you make sure to keep your eyes attached to his, dying to watch him submerge into ecstasy. he enjoys the control he has over you. you gag around him, and when he whimpers from the sensation, you can't help but grind in your position, the neediness itching at you. trailing your dominant hand between your thighs, you use two of your fingers to spread your lower lips apart to collect your juices before sinking them into your soaked opening. 

"oh my god," he notices instantly, choking on a moan as your nails dug into his thigh, moaning around him. he's breathing heavily, your teary eyes the trigger. pressure builds inside him now. he evokes a low growl, and his pace picks up even more, and so do your fingers. shifting your hips quicker. “i’m so proud of you, mama. you doin’ me so fuckin’ good right now.” 

eren loses himself in the raw act of claiming your mouth, each brutal thrust forces a corresponding squelch from your stuffed lips, saliva and precum mingling in a lewd display of submission. you continue sucking, your moans vibrating around his shaft as you fuck yourself open for him, juices flowing freely down your thighs. eren's thrusts become more urgent, his grasp on your hair tightening.

“fuck, baby gimme your throat," he whispers, his hips driving forward aggressively. “take it real deep.” 

with a deep thrust, eren hits the back of your throat and holds it there, the pressure building at the base of his dick. your eyes water, tears streaming down your cheeks as you hold your breath, never breaking eye contact, silently urging him on. your eyes roll back, overwhelmed by the sheer size of eren's dick fucking your throat. you gag as he fucks your face steadily with his head tossed back, and through it all, you find yourself getting wetter at the depravity of it all. eren's neediness is arousing, his hips rocking into your mouth with so much lust. you can feel his balls slapping against your chin with each thrust, the sound echoing obscenely in the almost quiet room. the tv luckily drowned out most sounds. suddenly, eren's entire dick pulses and throbs within your throat, hot jets of cum erupting directly onto your tongue. you swallow, like he likes, gulping down every drop as he rides out his orgasm, finally stilling to catch his breath.

“fuck,” he wheezed, hips jerking as he carefully pulls his toned hips back to let you breathe, dick twitching and jumping, still hard and needing more. groaning when you kiss the tip and after, his happy trail. “that felt too good, sweetheart. c’mere.” 

eren’s gaze locks onto your face, drinking in the sight of your gratified expression as he picks you up, sitting you on the couch as he lowers his head between your thighs. your knees are hiked up to your chest, your thumb hanging on the corner of your mouth as you stare down at him in bliss. his brain rewires every time he sees her; puffy, warm, and soaking just for him. the anklet you have shimmers as you chew at your thumb and gyrate your hips, waiting for him to touch you with a pleading whine. 

he slides two fingers knuckle-deep into your dripping pussy, pumping them carefully as he lowers his face to suckle your clit into his mouth. your quiet moans and cries spur him on, your hand going atop his head to guide him as he eats you out. your hips buck against his face, your body trembling beneath him, back arched and toes curled as he devours you. he's relentless, tongue flattening across your clit as he moves his head to apply pressure, lips kissing and swallowing your clit while his fingers twist and fuck into you. you're panting now, fingers tangled in his hair, tugging him closer while your face screws up in pleasure, hating that you couldn’t scream the way you wanted. 

"mmm, look at that pussy, baby. look,” eren’s grabbing the back of your neck to connect your forehead with his, forcing your gaze to look at the way his fingers move inside of you, soft tummy molding. “fuckk, she’s so sweet. clenching too tight. give her t’me. make it easy.” 

sobbing, you nod your head against his, covering your mouth to muffle your moans as tears well. he curls his fingers just right, hitting that elusive spot far inside that makes your toes curl. grunting, he lowers his face back, burying it into your cunt feeling the scruff of his facial hair creating delicious friction against your sensitive skin. he’s opening and encasing his lips around your clit in iterations, sucking and licking hard, spanking your outer thigh while slicking his face up and down, your wetness lewdly known. 

“ooo, f-fuckk, ba—by, agh!” the pressure builds, coiling tighter in your belly until you can't hold back anymore. you cry out, fisting at his hair and the fabric of the couch as you roll your hips harder on his mouth.

“you’re making such a mess, girl,” he talks against your pussy, swallowing down every drop you give him. spanking you repetitively, the act and vibration causing your thighs to clamp around his ears as your orgasm crashes over you. pleasure rippling through your body, your juices flooding eren's mouth as he laps at you greedily, prolonging your bliss.

the shivers come from every part of you, your legs, your arms, and the breath on your lips. wanting to cry from how good it felt along with the frustration of not being able to scream. eren comes up to kiss you, muttering ‘go ‘head’ to let you scream into his mouth, grunting and moaning altogether from the intensity. your legs unable to stop shaking. he’s giving you open mouth kisses, your sounds stirring something sinister within his dick as you suck on his tongue, tasting yourself and groping at his waist to bring him closer to you. 

“atta girl,” he pecks your lips one more time before pulling you to stand again. 

eren turns you around, bending you forward as your thighs press tight together, holding your body up by your forearms pulled back. your upper body hangs, tits threatening to spill from your bralette. eren’s hair is long in his face now, positioning his hips so his dick can slide easily into you without the extra support. a low groan rumbles in his throat when his wish is granted, and you take him full. a ring of white shadowing around his dick with your cream, breathlessly whispering ‘yeah, fuck’ under his breath. feeling his dick makes you whine, shifting your ass back, greedy for more. this feeling never gets old. 

“fuck, yes. squeeze me just like that,” he rasps, pulling nearly all the way out before snapping his hips forward. you gasp from his roughness, tilting your pelvis to take him fully. the tightness making eren blow a raspberry before throwing his head back. “goddamn, mama.” 

“p-please,” you beg, moving your ass back as much as you could, not having much power over strength at the moment. “need it, baby. fuck me.” 

there was no need for that since he already had the intention of fucking you numb. shifting hips waist, he's rolling into you with ease, your ass clapping back onto his abdomen as he lets out a disgruntled noise that's loud enough to wake the entire house. you squeak, his thrusts rough and steady, fucking you good while keeping you still. heaving, your body falls back into his weakly, having no control over how he wants to use you. thighs adding pressure onto your clit as you mindlessly bounce back on his dick that's splitting you open.

"b-baby. . . too loud," a small panic drawls out, leveling your head to avoid blood rushing to it. eren scoffs, slowing himself momentarily to bring his face by yours.

“i don’t give a fuck, this my house,” he rasps, trailing open-mouthed kisses along the column of your jawline. “do you want me to make you cum or not?” 

he assumed you crying was the answer, responding with ‘mhm’ as a ‘that’s what i thought’.  his dick twitches inside of you, eren doing his best to keep his composure, but you make it nearly impossible. he's pistoning in and out, watching you coat his dick sweetly, voice laced with lust as you spasm around him and cum unexpectedly. he groans while listening to your cries that ripple brokenly, pounding depravedly as pleasure courses through both your veins.

“it feel good cummin’ on my dick?” 

“yess, ‘ren. c-can’t stop cummin’, baby.” 

“gimme some more.” 

you bite your lip hard to stifle the scream threatening to spill, fingers curling into fists as you fight to maintain restraint. sweat beads on your brow from the exertion of keeping yourself still and silent under his relentless onslaught. the coil of tension in your core winds tighter and tighter, orgasm just out of reach. just when you think you can't hold back any longer, eren shifts slightly, changing the angle of his thrusts. now, the head of his dick is kissing that sweet spot within you with every mean, intended stroke. a strangled gasp escapes you unbidden as that warm feeling bursts once more, convulsing helplessly in his hold, muscles clenching wildly around his dick as you struggle to muffle your cries behind clenched teeth. your hand pushes at his waist as a signal for some form of relief, moving your body forward. 

“where you goin’,” eren’s yanking you back the moment you try to escape, locking your wrists in his one hand, the other gripping your waist to continue fucking you back onto him. 

“erenn,” your voice cracks, your vision blurring from the intensity. a hiccup falls, your head hanging low as he grounds his dick all up in you. you hear yourself squelch, his sharp hips interacting with the softness of your ass that recoils back. your hands struggle in his hold, crying at the deadlock. but it felt so, so damn good. “f-fuck you. oh my god, fuck you, baby.” 

eren tongues his inner cheek with a snarky chuckle. “that just makes me w’na fuck you harder.”  

the stamina he has gives you a headache sometimes, unknowing of when you end up flat on your stomach lying on the sectional part of the sofa. eren notches the head of his dick between your folds to gather more of your slick before sinking back in, sheathing himself entirely, balls flattening on the curve of your ass. the solid warmth of his body blanketing yours, wrapping his bicep around your neck while he grabs onto the armrest before you two, rolling his hips and dropping his dick into you. 

“no one’s ever g’na do the shit i do to you,” he sloppily french kisses behind your ear, voice growing weak, panting heavier.

“mhm mm,” you agree without words, breaking out to follow the rhythm of his hips.

“your so pretty. say it. tell me you're my pretty girl.” 

tears prick at the corners of your eyes, face flushed, and arousal coiling hot and heavy in your belly, responding greedily to his every action. 

"i’m your pretty girl,” you gasp weakly, voice barely audible. your nails dig into the cushion as you writhe helplessly, full with his heavy dick and held immobile by his superior strength. every ruthless drive of his hips forces the air from your lungs, making you feel floaty.

a choked sob escapes him as he sinks everything into you, your fingers clawing frantically at the upholstery. you try to bury your face in the cushions to muffle your noises as he splits you open, each powerful thrust getting a singular sound from you, but eren had other plans. his big hand covers your mouth, continuously french kissing your neck as he grunts by your ear and rambles the filthiest things. your body does what it’s trained to; react. you cry in his palm, pussy fluttering around him as you cum for what seems like the tenth time, squeezing his dick like a vise. trembling violently beneath him and it takes every ounce of self-control he possesses not to let loose the feral growl building in his throat, knowing it would alert your father of your illicit activities. instead, he grits his teeth and redoubles his efforts, fucking into you his hardest to pursue his own release.

“eren,” even in your lightheaded state you begin to worry. his skin clashing obscenely loud with yours makes it hard for you not to scream after every nasty pound. you can feel him in your stomach, eyes rolling back into your skull as your mouth drops open, gasping in fragments.

“shut that shit up, ꒰♡꒱.” 

whining pathetically, you let him use you as he pleases simply ‘cause there’s no room for bickering. all coherent thoughts flee, leaving only primal instinct and the desperate need for release. with a muffled grunt, he buries himself to the hilt and cums inside you, his grip on your hip tightening almost painfully as he thrusts out every hot drop, shuddering while grinding against your ass to prolong the sensations.

"holy fuck," his voice cracks, rumbling as he hits your ass again and again.

eren slumps heavily atop you, both of you panting and twitching in the aftermath. he rolls to the side, pulling you with him so you're draped across his chest rather than crushed beneath his weight. one large hand strokes lazily up and down your spine as the other tangles in your wild curls, holding you close as he tries to catch his breath.

"you did so well, love," he praises softly, pressing a kiss to the crown of your head and rubbing on you soothingly.  "you're a good girl, i love you so much.”

his voice is warm and approving, filled with the kind of affection that makes your heart swell with happiness. in this moment, cocooned in his strong arms and basking in the afterglow, nothing else matters. this anniversary was just one of many. you were worn out, drifting off to sleep without responding, but he knew you felt the same. eren managed to clean you up in your sleep, dressing you with his hoodie again and snuggling under the warm blankets for the rest of the night.

the following morning, you awake to the smell of brewed coffee and pancakes. wiping your eyes and yawning as you make your way towards the brightly lit kitchen, needing to soak in the bath since you can barely walk. finding your father and eren cooking together while listening to the radio broadcasts. it was the most shocking sight seeing them bond. your father flipping buttery flapjacks and your husband fixing the garbage disposal since something got caught in it. your heart blossomed nonetheless, thinking that this is all you wanted all along. this was the best gift. 

© 𝑠𝑡4𝑟𝑏𝑤𝑟𝑟𝑦 . all rights reserved. please do not repost, steal, or modify my work simply because it is mine. stealing isn't cute. i'll ruin your life.♡

[starr-251]

Flower symbolism in Yuumori:

We all know that some characters have assigned flowers in the manga (Liam and Sherlock) and others in the anime (Louis, Albert and John), but I've never felt they're quite right. They seem a bit lackluster, so I tried to make my own list complete with meanings!

Liam: lilies. They symbolize purity, and are commonly a symbol of mourning, often found on gravestones of family members.

Albert: roses. They symbolize love, and the added touch of sub rosa interacts nicely with their goals.

Louis: azalea. As I've mentioned before, they symbolize family and unity, so it's only fitting they'd go to the one keeping the family together.

Moran: forget-me-not. They symbolize undying love and loyalty, and past memories. Very fitting for a soldier.

Fred: edelweiss. They symbolize courage and devotion, two things Fred has a lot of.

James: belladonna. Not only do they symbolize beauty and confidence, they were also used by cosmetics by victorian women.

Moneypenny: jasmine. They symbolize grace and elegance, and are both used in tea and perfumes, making it a nice touch for her.

Herder: periwinkle. They symbolize friendship and new begginings, both things he heavily desires, if we are to go by chapter 12.

Sherlock: iris. They symbolize strenght and intelligence, both things he has a surplus of, and also have the additional meaning of wisdom, which he acquired in NYC.

John: violet. They symbolize loyalty and hope, both of which are always fitting themes for any Watson of any media.

Miss Hudson: zinnia. They symbolize affection and absence, a way to show how much she missed her boy during the timeskip.

Mycroft: nasturtium. They symbolize patriotism and conquest. Only fitting for the Queen's right hand man, isn't it?

[forgivemeforgetmenot]

Unwritten

(Cloud x Aerith Fanfic)

Chapter 3: Intoxicated

"Daddy!!" cried Marlene, dashing past a beaming Elmyra. Barret chuckled as he scooped up his daughter and kissed her tiny face.

"How you doin' baby girl? You been good for Elmyra, yeah?"

"Always, Daddy!"

The gang exchanged greetings as Aerith's mother ushered them inside the cozy cottage. "Something smells delicious," chimed Aerith, bouncing to the kitchen.

"You all are back just in time; I'm making Miso Yasai Ramen for dinner," Elmyra said. "Please, please, everyone, make yourselves comfortable. Wash up, unpack your things, and decompress. There's still some time before the food's ready."

"Thank you so much for your hospitality, Ms. Gainsborough," Tifa exhaled. She ruffled Marlene's hair on her way upstairs, earning a giggle from the child clinging closely to Red XIII.

Cloud's eyes trailed after her as she vacated the room. They hadn't had the chance to talk since last night when she pelted him with Aerith-related questions and raced off. He nearly rose from his seat at the coffee table but decided to leave her be.

"Yeah," added Barret awkwardly, "Thanks again for keepin' an eye on my Marlene. I can't tell ya how much it… means to me."

Elmyra, now overlooking a pot on the stove, waved him off, "Oh, dear, I've told you repeatedly that you don't need to keep thanking me. Spending time with Marlene is a pleasure. She kind of reminds me of you when you were younger." She pointed a wooden spoon toward Aerith, spurring the brunette to smile.

"Marlene's far more well-behaved than I was," Aerith giggled, winking at her. Marlene laughed, mimicking her wink.

"Oh!" the little girl suddenly exclaimed, "Daddy, Elmyra helped me plant my first flower! Wanna see?"

Before Barret could respond, Marlene jumped up, grabbed her father's hand, and started pulling toward the door. "Come too, Red!" Marlene pleaded to the smiling beast.

Red nodded, "Aye, aye, captain," and casually followed the two outside.

"Did you plant azaleas?" Aerith asked her mother, strolling over to the table. Although all the seats were empty, she picked the spot closest to Cloud's; he swallowed.

Elmyra eyed her daughter, then smiled tenderly. "Actually, yes. I don't know why I still feel surprised after all these years."

"Surprised? About?" Aerith repeated, tilting her head.

"About your intuition," she laughed.

Aerith smiled, facing Cloud. "Azaleas represent family and unity. Planting them is a good reminder for Marlene that even though Barret can't always be here physically," Aerith placed her hand gently on his chest, "he'll always be right there."

His heart raced; he hoped she couldn't feel it pounding against her palm. Embarrassment flushed Cloud's cheeks, forcing him to avert his gaze. He hated it when she did things like this, especially in front of others."You've been awfully quiet this evening, Cloud," commented Elmyra.

"Cloud's always quiet," Aerith teased, nudging him.

"Well, you talk enough for the both of us," he retorted. Elmyra emitted a hearty laugh as Aerith feigned a hurt expression.

"Oh, you. Don't act like you aren't hanging onto every word."

He blushed, then ascended to his feet. He needed a break from all of Aerith's poking and prodding. "I'm going to wash up," Cloud announced shortly before escaping to the restroom.

After devouring Elmyra's delectable meal, the group migrated outside to relax. The Gainsborough's property was already breathtaking during the day; it appeared like a page torn out of a fairytale book Barret might read to Marlene at night.

Fireflies floated to and fro, illuminating the massive garden with an ethereal glow. The air smelled of fresh flowers and herbs; Cloud inhaled deeply, relishing in the sweet aroma; its ambiance soothed him in a way no other place could.

Out of the corner of his eye, he spotted Marlene wordlessly slip her hand into Aerith's, guiding her out of sight. "Probably showing off her Azaleas," Red remarked, sidling beside Cloud.

"Mm," he nodded.

"Don't be jealous; I'm sure she'll show you too," he joked.

Marlene had warmed up to Cloud considerably over the last several months, but he could tell she was still somewhat leery of him. He was never a people person, but kids were the ultimate test of patience. "Don't care. Flowers aren't my thing anyway," he replied nonchalantly.

Red chuckled, "Maybe if you were more honest about the fact that you do care, she'd braid your hair and pick flowers with you too."

"And she'll treat me like a housecat like you, too? No thanks," Cloud quipped.

Red smiled, his eyes trailing after the fireflies, "It's not what you think. Caring doesn't make you weak. It's okay to be transparent about it. In fact, people tend to like it."

"I don't care what people like," the merc folded his arms.

Aerith and Marlene reemerged hand-in-hand. Cloud followed the Cetra's every movement. Marlene started bouncing beside her, urging her to "dance" with the fireflies. Aerith gleefully complied, and the two twirled around, laughing. 

"Are you sure about that?" Red smirked, sauntering past Cloud and over to the girls. After some convincing, Tifa and Barret joined the trio. Cloud observed as they pranced around each other, laughing without a care.

Aerith caught him watching and waved him over. Cloud looked away shyly; he'd rather dive headfirst into a pool full of lava than ever dance again. 

Aerith abandoned the frolicking group and advanced toward him. Before she could speak, Cloud was already shaking his head. "No, no, no," he stated firmly, backing away from her.

She sped up and seized his hand, giggling, "Yes, yes, yes!"

"Aerith," he complained as she jerked him closer.

"Cloud," she imitated his tone, swaying their arms back and forth playfully, "Come ooon! All of Midgar knows how well you can dance; you can't just squander your talent away brooding in the shadows."

Without further protest, he allowed the exuberant woman to position his hand on her waist. She placed a hand on his shoulder and interlocked her other with his. They clumsily wobbled around; Cloud nervously followed her lead as they rocked back and forth.

Aerith giggled, gazing into his eyes as they danced. Cloud worried he was blushing; he wanted to avoid her face but, for some reason, couldn't pry himself away. Her green eyes glimmered as bright as the lightning bugs encircling the pair. Mesmerized, his bottom lip dropped slightly,

"What is it?" she asked, tilting her head.

"Hm?" he replied, transfixed.

"Your face; you look thoughtful. Wistful," Aerith specified, still guiding their haphazard movements.

"I'm…not thinking anything."

It wasn't entirely dishonest. Cloud felt disoriented. Anxious? No, intoxicated. He wasn't exactly thinking anything specific, but his being was overwhelmed with feelings—sensations he wasn't sure how to convey. "Hmm," she eyed him skeptically.

Feeling overwhelmed, Cloud pulled away abruptly. He glanced at the house as Aerith whined. "We didn't even do the Moogle Dance!"

Cloud rasped, striding past her. He noticed Tifa staring glumly. Earlier, she looked so joyful with their friends. What happened? "Going to bed?" she asked softly as he walked toward the door. Barret, Marlene, and Red were still bopping around happily.

He nodded, uncertain of what to say to her. Should he ask what's wrong? Should he address last night? He feared saying something that might make her feel worse. Instead, he sat down silently beside her on the porch. "Tired of dancing?" Cloud asked while observing the others. His eyes instinctively drifted to Aerith, now gazing up at the sky.

"Kind of," Tifa laughed, then added, "How about you? You were really grooving over there."

"I was being held hostage," he muttered, lounging.

"I don't know. You looked like…you were having fun to me," Tifa reflected quietly.

Cloud studied her. She altered her sorrowful expression with a smile, "It's nice. You know, to see you loosen up."

"You just enjoy watching me make a fool of myself."

"That too," Tifa giggled.

The two friends sat in silence for a moment. Then Cloud asked, "You okay?"

The question seemingly startled Tifa, who stood almost immediately. "Yeah, of course," she smiled, "Just tired."

Cloud nodded slowly, hesitant to accept her excuse. 

"I'm gonna try to get some sleep," she decided, "Goodnight, Cloud."

"Night," he replied.

Tifa stepped to the door but paused before twisting the knob. Cloud expected her to say something else, but she finally went inside without another word.

Gradually, everyone else filed inside. First, Barret and Marlene. Shortly after, Red XIII. A half-hour later, Aerith approached the porch with a peaceful smile. "Are you stargazing too?" she asked, plopping beside him.

"Something like that." Truthfully, he'd been watching her more than anything else out there. 

"Oooor, are you avoiding sleep?"

Cloud looked at her with a curious expression and asked, "What?"

Aerith met his gaze, "You won't have any nightmares here. Promise."

He diverted his view upward to spot a patch of shimmering stars.

"Do you trust me, Cloud?"

The question caught him off guard, "W-What?"

"Do you trust me?" she reprised, leaning closer.

"Of course," he replied, to his surprise, without hesitation.

"Good!" Aerith beamed, slipping her hand into his and guiding him to his feet.

"Where are we going," he questioned. She pulled him down a path and to a cluster of pink Azaleas.

"Marlene asked me to show you. Aren't they so beautiful?"

"Yeah, they're um… pretty," Cloud awkwardly agreed.

He scanned the flowers surrounding them and settled on a patch of yellow lilies—the same flower Aerith gifted him when they first met.

"Are those your favorite?" she asked, noticing.

Cloud folded his arms, "Dunno."

"Do you remember what they symbolize?" she asked, plucking one and placing it on his chest, just as she had done a lifetime ago.

"Reunion," he answered, lifting his eyes from the flower to her.

"That's right!" she said merrily, "Now for your prize."

Before he could respond, Aerith's pursed lips were pressed to his cheek. The kiss was mere centimeters away from the corner of his mouth. For a moment, Cloud wondered if she'd intended something more intimate. Part of him was relieved she missed her potential mark; another part felt…disappointed?

Her hands lingered against his chest, careful not to crush the yellow lily she gave him. Cloud swallowed hard, voiceless. Stop doing that, he should tell her. You mess around too much. 

Cloud's eyes descended to her mouth. She placed the back of her hand on his forehead. "Are you feeling okay, Cloud? You look a little sweaty."

He grabbed her wrist, pulled it away from his face, and held it. "Stop doing that," he scolded.

"Doing what?"

"You know what," he griped, still clutching her.

Aerith's head tilted to the side with a confused expression.

Cloud scowled, clarifying, "You can't just… go around touching and kissing people like that."

Aerith laughed, "You're not people, silly."

"I'm not," Cloud paused, unsure how to express his issue, "I'm not your boyfriend."  

For the first time in a long time, Aerith broke eye contact first, her gaze plunging to the ground. Her usual warm smile vanished. Had he hurt her feelings? "I didn't realize it bothered you," she said quietly.

He lowered her arm to her side before letting go. The desire to hold her bubbled inside of him; Cloud wasn't a physically affectionate person or affectionate, at all. Comforting people wasn't his specialty; fighting was. Right now, however, he felt the impulse to at least try. Take it back. Tell her you don't mind. Hug her.

Cloud only stared at her, "Aerith…"

"I know," she said with glistening eyes, "you're not my boyfriend." Much like Tifa had done earlier that evening, Aerith disguised her sorrow with a smile and a joke, "You're my bodyguard!"

She brushed past him; he turned and recaptured her arm, suspending her. She pivoted to face him and smiled, "Bedtime, Cloud."

"Just wait," he ordered.

"For?"

"I…don't mind. Not really," The confession rolled from Cloud's mouth as though he'd been struggling to cough up a boulder.

"Jeez, Cloud," Aerith playfully pouted, "Make up your mind; now you're confusing me."

"I'm confusing you?" he scoffed. Says the woman who can't keep her lips to herself.

Cloud groaned, released Aerith, and plodded past her. He didn't get paid enough for this. Or at all, actually.

[pvccblog]

A GREAT FIT

It is safe to say that God brought us to a place that is a good fit for our team! We have felt so welcome, and we have had some great opportunities already. Connections have been made and our prayer is that they will continue to grow as the week moves on. Will you pray along with us? Yes........I MEAN YOU!!

We got to the park this morning to set up for camp and I had to run down the street to get some ice. When I left, no campers had arrived yet. When I came back, the area was packed with kids getting signed up. We ended up with 17 campers! They all had a blast! They had energy right off the bat and really enjoyed their time. After camp was over, the kids were smiling and hugging us and asking when we'd see them again. It was amazing.

The other blessing about camp today was that a bunch of the moms and grandmothers hung out and watched the kids play and had some great fellowship with each other. A few dads were in and out too. Pastor Fred stuck around and it was cool to see that he is well respected here and loves to connect.

We also received a great surprise visit as Sports Camp was wrapping up. Pastor Joe and Jenny Murrell stopped by! They were on their way to see their son Josh and his family in Salem and Jenny texted me while they were in the road. I told her the name of the park and they showed up about 45 minutes later. It was a great visit, we love them so much!

I've also noticed there's actually a pretty cool network going on here between some of the churches in the area. The events we're doing this week are in a neighboring town of Azalea called Glendale. There are a couple churches in Glendale that Pastor Fred knows pretty well. He's been plugging our events to these other churches. Fred mentioned that he desires what is best for the Kingdom of God this week, and that may not mean that everyone we come into contact with will end up going to Azalea Community Church. He picked Glendale Park because it was a central location with a lot of kids and teens. It is also a town with great need for the gospel. It's great to see that kind of unity in God's people from different congregations!

BARF Night was also amazing and full of energy tonight! The pastor and youth pastor from the Baptist Church in Glendale showed up tonight with their families and it was obvious that they are connected to the local teens. We did a little canvassing before our event and a few guys we passed out fliers to ended up coming.

The games were great and pretty intense at times - in a good way. We also had a few little kids that we had to dodge while playing. We aren't really strict on the ages for Mission Venture BARF Nights and it can get a little scary when the older kids are flying all over the place. Please pray for safety!

I'm not sure how many showed up to BARF but it was probably about as many as came to Sports Camp. One teen said that he is going to invite his whole track team tomorrow. A couple others said they will spread the word too! We're looking forward to a bigger crowd tomorrow.

My lovely daughter Ellie shared her testimony tonight and she did an excellent job. It's crazy to think that she is on her last Mission Venture as a student. I'm super proud of her and she's been a great leader on this trip. She really brings the energy and loves all her "besties" here on the team.

Right now all the Pine Valley students are sitting around chatting in the sanctuary with Maci and Axel. They're having a blast sharing some stories of some embarrassing experiences in their lives. They are quite the unified team!

We would love for you to pray for great opportunities for gospel conversations this week. Some locals have shared with us about the sad situations that many of the kids in Glendale are experiencing in their lives right now. It's all pretty heartbreaking. Pray that these teens that are coming to BARF Night will commit to Jesus! Our team is looking for chances to go deeper with these kids, and are confident that God will provide!

Thanks so much everyone!!

[bobblesnbittybites]

Curious about what types of Olives and Olivias I should do next!

so- send me a wild animal, butterfly, plant, fungus, and/or metal/crystal/rock to make a pair out of! Here’s some notes about flower language and a few meanings of other plants to help out.

Acacia Blossom - Concealed Love; Beauty in Retirement;  Chaste Love

Acorn - Nordic Symbol of Life and immortality

Ambrosia - Your Love is Reciprocated

Arbutus- Thee Only Do I Love

Aster - Symbol of Love: Daintiness

Azalea - Take Care of Yourself for Me; Temperance; Fragile Passion; Chinese Symbol of Womanhood

Alstroemeria flower is symbolic of wealth, prosperity and fortune. It is also the flower of friendship.

Amaryllis This flower is symbolic of splendid beauty. It is also used to indicate worth beyond beauty. Pride; Pastoral Poetry

Anemone on a darker note indicates fading hope and a feeling of having been forsaken. On a positive note, it symbolizes anticipation. Forsaken

Anthurium symbolizes hospitality. It is also used to indicate happiness and abundance.

Aster symbolizes patience. It is also indicative of a love of variety. It also symbolizes elegance and daintiness.

Bird of Paradise symbolizes joyfulness. It also symbolizes magnificence. It can also be used to indicate exciting and wonderful anticipation.

Bouvardia Double symbolizes enthusiasm. It is also used to indicate zest for life.

Bachelor Button - Single Blessedness

Begonia - Beware

Bells of Ireland - Good Luck

Bittersweet - Truth

Bluebell - Humility

Bouquet of Withered Flowers- Rejected Love

Cactus - Endurance

Camellia-  Admiration; Perfection; Good Luck, Gift to a Man, Pink - Longing for You, Red - You're a Flame in My Heart, White - You're Adorable

Candy Tuft - Indifference

Cattail - Peace; Prosperity

Chrysanthemum-  represent happiness, love, longevity and joy, yellow: neglected love or sorrow, red : love, white : loyalty and devoted love, 

Coreopsis - Always Cheerful

Crocus - Cheerfulness

Cyclamen - Resignation and Good-bye

Calla Lily symbolizes magnificence and beauty. White Calla lilies combine these two attributes with purity and innocence associated with the color white to make it the perfect choice of flower in a Wedding bouquet.

Carnation symbolizes pride and beauty, Fascination; Divine Love. A red carnation symbolizes love, pride, and admiration; My Heart Aches for You; Admiration; a pink carnation symbolizes the love of a woman or a mother; I'll Never Forget You; a purple carnation symbolizes capriciousness; a yellow carnation symbolizes disdain, rejection or disappointment; You Have Disappointed Me; Rejection; while a white carnation symbolizes innocence and pure love; Sweet and Lovely; Innocence; Pure Love; Woman's Good Luck Gift. A striped carnation conveys No; Refusal; Sorry I Can't Be with You: Wish l Could Be with You. Solid Colour - Yes

Chrysanthemum symbolizes fidelity, optimism, joy, and a long life. A red chrysanthemum conveys love; a white chrysanthemum symbolizes truth and loyal love while a yellow chrysanthemum symbolizes slighted love. General - You're A Wonderful Friend; Cheerfulness and Rest, Red - I Love, White - Truth, Yellow - Slighted Love

Daffodil symbolizes regard and chivalry. It is indicative of rebirth, new beginnings, and eternal life. It also symbolizes unrequited love. A single Daffodil foretells misfortune while a bunch of daffodils indicates joy and happiness. Regard; Unrequited Love; You're the Only One; The Sun is Always Shining When I'm with You

Daisy symbolizes innocence and purity. It conveys loyal love and “I will never tell”. Gerbera Daisy specifically conveys cheerfulness. Innocence; Loyal Love; I'll Never Tell; Purity

Delphinium, Hybrid symbolizes big-heartedness, fun, lightness and levity. It also indicates an ardent attachment.

Dandelion - Faithfulness; Happiness

Dead Leaves - Sadness

Fern - Magic; Fascination; Confidence and Shelter, Maidenhair - Secret Bond of Love

Fir - Time

Flax - Domestic Symbol

Forget-Me-Not- True Love; Memories

Freesia symbolizes innocence and thoughtfulness.

Forsythia - Anticipation

Gardenia symbolizes purity and sweetness. They indicate secret love. They convey joy. They tell the receiver you are lovely. You're Lovely: Secret Love

Gerbera belongs to the daisy family and therefore assumes the symbolism associated with the daisy flower. Gerbera specifically conveys cheerfulness.

Gladiolus symbolizes strength of character, faithfulness, and honor. The Gladiolus flower signifies remembrance. Give Me a Break . . . I'm Really Sincere; Flower of the Gladiators

Grass - Submission

Garlic - Courage; Strength

GeraniuM -"Stupidity; Folly

GLOXINIA - Love at First Sight

Hyacinth symbolizes playfulness and a sporty attitude and in its extreme rashness. Hyacinths also denote constancy. Blue hyacinth stands for constancy, purple for sorrow, red or pink for play, white for loveliness and yellow for jealousy.

Hydrangea symbolizes heartfelt emotions. It can be used to express gratitude for being understood. In its negative sense hydrangea symbolizes frigidity and heartlessness. Thank You for Understanding; Frigidity; Heartlessness

Hyacinth  General - Games and Sports; Rashness: Flower Dedicated to Apollo, Blue - Constancy, Purple - I Am Sorry; Please Forgive Me: Sorrow, Red or Pink - Play, White- Loveliness; I'll Pray for You, Yellow - Jealousy

Holly - Defense; Domestic Happiness

Heather Lavender symbolizes admiration, solitude, and beauty while white heather symbolizes protection and indicates that wishes will come true. Lavender - Admiration; Solitude, White - Protection; Wishes will Come True,

Iris symbolizes eloquence. Purple iris is symbolic of wisdom and compliments. Blue iris symbolizes faith and hope. Yellow iris symbolizes passion while white iris symbolizes purity. 

Fleur-de-Lis, Emblem of France: Your Friendship Means So Much to Me; Faith; Hope; Wisdom and Valour; My Compliment

Ivy - Wedded Love; Fidelity; Friendship; Affection, Ivy Sprig Of White Tendrils -Anxious to Please; Affection

Jonquil - Love Me; Affection Returned; Desire; Sympathy; Desire for Affection Returned

Larkspur-  Pink - Fickleness

Lily-0f-The-Valley - Sweetness; Tears of the Virgin Mary; Return to Happiness; Humility; You've Made My Life Complete

Larkspur symbolizes levity or lightness. It is also indicative of fickleness and haughtiness.

Lilac symbolizes youthful innocence and confidence. White lilac symbolizes humility and innocence, field lilac symbolizes charity while purple lilac symbolizes first love.

Lily symbolizes purity and refined beauty. White lily symbolizes modesty and virginity, orange lily symbolizes passion, yellow lily symbolizes gaiety while Lily of the Valley symbolizes sweetness and purity of heart. The Easter lily is the symbol of the Virgin Mary. Calla - Beauty, Day - Coquetry; Chinese Emblem for Mothers,  Eucharis - Maiden Charms,  Orange - Hatred, Tiger - Wealth; Pride,  White - Virginity; Purity; Majesty; It's Heavenly to Be with You, Yellow - I'm Walking on Air; False and Gay

Magnolia - Nobility

Marigold - Cruelty: Grief Jealousy

Mistletoe - Kiss me; Affection; To Surmount Difficulties; Sacred Plant of India; Magic Plant of the Druids

Monkshood - Beware; A Deadly Foe is Near

Moss - Maternal Love; Charity

Myrtle - Love; Hebrew Emblem of Marriage

Narcissus - Egotism; Formality; Stay as Sweet as You Are

Nasturtium - Conquest; Victory in Battle

Nuts - Stupidity

Oleander - Caution

Orange Blossom - Innocence; Eternal Love; Marriage and Fruitfulness

Orange Mock - Deceit

Orchid is a symbol of the exotic beauty. It symbolizes refinement, thoughtfulness and mature charm. It also symbolizes proud and glorious femininity. Love; Beauty; Refinement; Beautiful Lady; Chinese Symbol for Many Children, Cattleya - Mature Charm

Peony symbolizes bashfulness and compassion. It can also be used to express indignation or shame. It symbolizes a happy life, happy marriage, good health and prosperity. Shame; Gay Life; Happy Marriage

Palm Leaves - Victory and Success

Petunia - Resentment; Anger; Your Presence Soothes me

Pine - Hope; Pity

Poppy General - Eternal Sleep; Oblivion; Imagination, Red - Pleasure, White - Consolation, Yellow - Wealth; Success

Protea, King stands for change and transformation. It signifies daring and resourcefulness. It is symbolic of diversity and courage.

Queen Anne's Lace symbolizes a haven or sanctuary. It signifies complexity and delicateness.

Ranunculus symbolizes radiant charm. It conveys a message that you are radiant with charm or you are attractive.

Rose symbolizes love. It signifies love in its various forms. Its symbolism varies based on color, variety, and number. 

Primrose - I Can't Live Without You; Evening - Inconstancy

Rose:  Bridal - Happy Love, Christmas - Tranquilize My Anxiety; Anxiety, Coral - Desire, Damask - Persian Ambassador of Love, Dark Crimson - Mourning, Dark Pink - Thankfulness, Lavender - Enchantment, Orange - Fascination, Pale Peach - Modesty, Pale Pink - Grace, Joy, Red - Love, Respect, Single Full Bloom - I Love You; I Still Love You, Tea - I'll Remember; Always, Thornless - Love at First Sight, White - Innocence and Secrecy, White and Red Together - Unity White on Red Together - Flower Emblem of England, Yellow - Joy, Friendship

Rose Leaf - You May Hope,

Rosebud - Beauty and Youth; A Heart Innocent of Love, Moss - Confessions of Love, Red - Pure and Lovely, White - Girlhood

Roses  Bouquet of Full Bloom - Gratitude, Garland or Crown of - Reward of Merit; Crown Symbol of Superior Merit,  Musk Cluster - Charming

Red Roses: A red rose is an unmistakable expression of love. Red roses convey deep emotions - be it love, longing or desire. Red Roses can also be used to convey respect, admiration or devotion. A deep red rose can be used to convey heartfelt regret and sorrow. The number of red roses has special romantic meanings associated with them. 12 red roses are the most popular of all which conveys "Be mine" and "I love you"

White Roses: White is the color of purity, chastity, and innocence. White flowers are generally associated with new beginnings and make an ideal accompaniment to a first-time bride walking down the aisle. White flowers can be used to convey sympathy or humility. They also are indicative of spirituality. Hence, white roses also follow suit.

Yellow Roses: Yellow roses are an expression of exuberance. Yellow roses evoke sunny feelings of joy, warmth and welcome. They are symbols of friendship and caring. The yellow rose, like the other roses, does not carry an undertone of romance. It indicates purely platonic emotions.

Pink Roses: There are a lot of variations of the pink rose. Overall, pink roses are used to convey gentle emotions such as admiration, joy, and gratitude. Light pink rose blooms are indicative of sweetness and innocence. Deep pink rose blooms convey deep gratitude and appreciation. Pink roses also connote elegance and grace.

Orange Roses: While a yellow rose reminds us of the sun, an orange rose reminds us of a fiery blaze. These fiery blooms signify passion and energy. Orange roses can be used to express intense desire, pride and fervor. They also convey a sense of fascination. These flowers rival only the red roses as messengers of passion in romance.

Lavender Roses: A Lavender rose like its color conveys enchantment. It also expresses "love at first sight". Darker shades of lavender roses (close to purple) convey a sense of regal majesty and splendor. These roses are used to express fascination and adoration.

Blue Roses: A perfectly blue rose is still elusive like the perfectly black rose. Blue roses cannot be achieved naturally so they represent the unattainable or the mysterious. Blue roses, therefore, embody the desire for the unattainable. They say "I can't have you but I can't stop thinking about you"

Green roses: Green is the color of harmony, of opulence, of fertility. It is also a color indicative of peace and tranquility. Green roses (these are off-white roses with shades of green) can symbolize best wishes for a prosperous new life or wishes for recovery of good health

Black Roses: Black is the color of death and farewell. A black rose, like the blue rose, remains elusive. What we know as black roses are actually really dark red roses. Black roses convey the death of a feeling or idea. Sending black roses to someone indicates the death of the relationship.

Mixed Roses: By mixing rose blooms of different colors purposefully, you can create a bouquet of emotions. For example, a bouquet of red and white roses would mean I love you intensely and my intentions are honorable. A random mix of roses would convey mixed feelings or send a message: "I don't know what my feelings are yet but I sure do like you enough to send you roses."

Snapdragon symbolizes graciousness and strength. Its negative connotations include deception and presumption. Deception; Gracious Lady

Spider Flower - Elope with Me

Stephanotis - Happiness in Marriage; Desire to Travel

Statice is symbolic of remembrance. It also symbolizes sympathy and success.

Stock symbolizes lasting beauty and a happy life. It is indicative of bonds of affection and is symbolic of promptness. Bonds of Affection; Promptness; You'll Always Be Beautiful to Me

Smilax - Loveliness

Sunflower signifies pure thoughts. It symbolizes adoration and dedication. It is symbolic of dedicated love. It is however also symbolic of haughtiness.

Sweet Pea indicates delicate pleasure and bliss. It is a flower symbolic of departure after having a good time. Good-bye; Departure; Blissful Pleasure; Thank You for a Lovely Time

Tulip signifies a declaration of love. It also symbolizes fame and perfect love. General - Perfect Lover; Fame; Flower Emblem of Holland, Red - Believe Me; Declaration of Love, Variegated - Beautiful Eyes, Yellow - There's Sunshine in Your Smile

Violet- Modesty,  Blue - Watchfulness; Faithfulness; I'll Always Be True, White - Let's Take a Chance on Happiness

Viscaria -Will You Dance with Me?

Zinnia-  Magenta - Lasting Affection, Mixed - Thinking (or in Memory) of an Absent Friend, Scarlet - Constancy, White - Goodness, Yellow - Daily Remembrance

If you have any more plants I’ve missed or something you would like to add please do! This is just something to get us going a bit more and for some fun drawings before I’m unable to post them thanks to break!

[kobayashi-aika]

Seiyuu Animedia September 2018: Interview with Kobayashi Aika (Part 1)

The first of two interviews in the recent Seiani. This one was Saint Aqours Snow themed.

Scans from Dyrea. QC from Mega.

“I can feel a ring around Aqours”

Q: Now that the 3rd Live Tour is over, tell us some of your honest thoughts.

A: It went by even faster than the 2nd Live Tour. We gave it our all, and had a lot of fun, but it still feels like there was a hole left in my heart. There were days after the tour ended where I would think “Oh, I guess there’s no rehearsal today?” (laughs).

Q: Were there any challenges you set for yourself during the 3rd Live Tour?

A: Definitely my solo song! Having everyone’s eyes on me in such huge venues, and basking in the glow of penlights in my color… just thinking about it makes me shiver. Being able to give input into the design of our performances made me really happy, too. It was a performance filled with things that we wanted to do, and so I wanted to let everyone fall in love with Yohane. I designed the performance thinking, “I want everyone to see how charming Yohane can be”.

Q: Was singing while sitting on a chair your idea?

A: Ever since I first heard the song, I had the mental image of sitting on a throne while singing, and the costume I imagined looked a lot like the SIF Punk Rock set costumes, so I suggested those for this performance. Also, the title of the song is “in this unstable world”, so I had the image of constantly going back and forth between Yoshiko and Yohane. It’s about what’s there between an angel and a fallen angel, so I also put a black and white wing on the back. Yohane was wearing white on the cover of Season 1’s Blu-Ray Volume 4, and I think white looks good on her. So I tried to convey the idea of Yohane and Yoshiko’s coexistence. I’m glad I was able to get that across in my solo song; the costume turned out even better than I imagined.

Q: Did you have any goals or challenges for the group songs as well?

A: I’m always performing to look like just Yohane does, but this live focused on Season 2, so I made it my goal to focus on getting the little details down. For example, in MY Mai☆TONIGHT, there’s the  “O” shaped mouths. It hasn’t really come up before, but in the song, there are a lot of places where we stress the “O” syllable, so I took a good look at how they’re done. I also made sure to check exactly how many times I need to wink, and I’ve become more conscious about what the other members are doing. I feel like I want to become a vessel to for Yohane to descend into and perform in.

Q: You’re really mindful about the details, aren’t you?

A: Right. There’s the “Yohane Bun”, but I also make sure my bangs are just like hers, and I dye my hair a little blue. I think it’s nice that I can become a vessel for Yohane, and let the audience connect with her, even for just one moment.

Q: Did anything in Aqours’ performances leave an impression on you throughout the tour?

There’s two things. One is definitely MIRACLE WAVE. I know how hard Anchan has been working, so I was really moved by her. At the moment of the jump, there’s a part in the choreography where she looks right at me, and I can see her holding in her emotions, and her nervousness right up close. I don’t know what kind of face I should show her...and when I see her expression, it makes me want to cry. But I feel like I have to cheer her up, and I think Yohane is the kind of person to do that too, so I always tell her “Go for it! You can do it!”. I’m so happy that she didn’t get hurt across the 3 venues and 6 performances.

Q: And what’s the other thing?

A: WONDERFUL STORIES. It’s the tour title, so I thought it might come sometime in the middle or at the end of the main performance, but it turns out that we did it at the end of the encore. I feel like the song being an insert song at the very, very end of episode 13 has a lot of meaning. It’s a summary of Love Live! Sunshine!!, as if the song was our curtain call. Having that be our last song gives even more meaning to the place that this franchise has brought us to. I think it’s really significant.

Q: How was performing on stage as Saint Aqours Snow?

A: I bet everyone was excited to finally see “Awaken the Power”, and I was really happy to be able to perform in front of everyone as Saint Aqours Snow! It’s an insert song in a very important episode of Season 2, so I think everyone had high expectations. Standing at center stage and being enveloped in everyone’s cheers felt really great… I was so surprised at how hyped up everyone was (laughs). It was fun feeling the power of the Numazu school idols and the Hakodate school idols coming together.

Q: From the 1st Live and the 2nd Live Tour, up until this 3rd Live Tour, what part of you do you think has grown the most?

A: I feel like our camaraderie has gotten even stronger. We were somehow able to make it through the 1st Live, but since then, our bonds have gotten even deeper. We went from being just friends to best friends, and from best friends to being like family by the time the 3rd Live Tour came around. Our individual feelings are all connected, and I’m excited to see where we’ll go from here.

Q: And what comes after becoming family?

A: As Yohane would say, everything will become one...something like that. (laughs).

Q: Do you feel like anything about Aqours has changed or grown with the 3rd Live Tour?

A: We do two days at every venue, and the first day is always nerve-wracking, but when I look at everyone’s faces, they look like they’re having fun. It’s different from the debilitating nervousness we felt during the 1st Live; even though we’re nervous, I can feel that we’re enjoying ourselves. I might feel pressure, but I also feel like I want to have fun. It’s probably because I feel like everything will be okay when I’m with everyone.

Q: You mentioned becoming “like family” earlier. Your bonds must have gotten a lot stronger since then.

A: I can feel a ring around Aqours. Of course, there’s the ring that we form right before every performance, But also, the bonds between all of us in Aqours, and everyone in the audience who comes to see us, form an even bigger ring around us. That makes me feel at ease.

Q: Lastly, what do you think are Aqours’ strongest points?

A: There’s the “ring”, but also, our unity! Our performances are never something we make by ourselves. Whenever we rehearse, I never feel like our performance is fully completed. The fact that people come to our lives and get excited is what completes it. I think that’s one of the charms of Aqours, and it’s our strongest point.

I’m excited to see where these deepened bonds will take us

Q: Any memories from lives, fanmeets or overseas events?

A: At LA, the fans gave us a special surprise with their penlights by making a rainbow. I wasn’t sure about how well we would be accepted in a different country, but that showed us that everyone was happy to see us. When I saw it, I just started crying.

Q: Did anything fun happen during the 3rd Live Tour?

A: During rehearsals, Aida Rikako-chan fell right asleep while we were backstage (laughs). It was really funny, so everyone was taking pictures and videos. But then her eyes started opening and she kept sleeping with her eyes half open (laughs).

Q: Any thoughts from the Hakodate Unit Carnival?

A: The 11 of us singing “Yume Kataru yori Yume Utaou” left a deep impression on me. Also, for the people listening, seeing the units go AZALEA-CYaRon!-Guilty Kiss was probably a breath of fresh air.

[celticpagans]

Magical Meaning of Flowers

Aster (daintiness) (love, from the Greek word for “star”) Apothecaries, witches and healers, believed Asters to have healing properties. Asters were laid on the graves of French soldiers to symbolise peace. Azalea (temperance – passion – womanhood – fragility) Azaleas grow as shrubs and small trees with a large and abundant flower display. The English name derived from the Greek word azaleos, meaning “dry.” Baby’s Breath (innocence) Baby’s breath symbolises purity of heart, the breath of the Holy Spirit and tenderness. Baby’s breath is a dense cluster of delicate flowers, a favourite of brides symbolising peace, love and unity. Bachelor Button (celibacy – single – blessedness – delicacy) Bachelor button symbolises hope in love, and is also known as the cornflower, basket flower and boutonniere flower. Young men wore a bachelor button flower signifying their love for a young woman, the flower faded quickly if the love was unrequited. This beautiful blue cornflower is Poland’s national flower. Bachelor buttons have been prized historically for their pigment. Bamboo (balance – flexibility – immortality – youth) Bamboo is a symbol for long life and is the most popular plant in China, it is considered a gentleman with perfect virtues and has the balance of Yin and the Yang. When a storm comes the bamboo bends with the wind. When the storm ceases, it resumes its upright position. It has the ability to overcome adversity and stand firmly Bauhinia – (harmony) The bauhinia has orchid-like flowers that are purple-red and surrounded by thick, heart shaped leaves, the flowers bloom from November to March. The Bauhinia flower features on the flag of Hong Kong. Begonia – (beware – fanciful nature) Begonias grow in subtropical and tropical moist climates, in South and Central America, Africa and southern Asia. Begonias have showy flowers of white, pink, scarlet, yellow, and attractively marked leaves. Bird of Paradise – (faithfulness – freedom – perspective) The bird of paradise flower is named because of a resemblance to the actual bird of paradise. In South Africa it is commonly known as a “crane” flower. Bluebell – (constancy – humility – gratitude) sometimes (“wild hyacinths”) Bluebells are considered, not only beautiful but magical, they are closely linked to the realm of fairies and are sometimes referred to as “fairy thimbles.”  In order to call fairies to a convention the bluebells would be rung, and children who picked them sometimes disappeared. Because of her connection with war and death, the bluebell keeps her head bowed, as bowmen in the Middle Ages glued feathers onto arrows using bluebell sap. Bluebells are known as Deadmen’s Bells. Buttercup – (neatness – humility – childishness) The buttercup is sometimes called “Coyote’s Eyes,” from the American legend of the coyote tossing his eyes up in air and catching them again, when an eagle swooped down and snatched the eyes. Not able to see, the coyote made eyes from the buttercup. Buttercups are part of a large genus of 400 species. Cactus – (endurance – burning love – maternal love – strength) Cacti are unique, distinctive plants, adapted to extremely arid and hot climates and have water conserving features. Their stems have green succulent structures containing the chlorophyll necessary for growth and life, the leaves have become the spines for which cacti are so well known. The cactus is a hardy and resilient plant. Calendula – (despair – grief – sorrow) Calendula blossoms are used to ease indigestion, and calendula petals are used in ointments to heal skin irritations, jaundice, sore eyes and toothaches. Calla Lily – (magnificent beauty) The calla lily is native to southern Africa and is visible in many works of art. Camellia – (perfection – gratitude – reasoning – admiration – good luck) Each colour has a symbolic meaning including innate worth, adoration, perfection and loveliness (white) innate worth, adoration, perfection, loveliness, (pink) longing, longing for love, (red) excellence, heart flame. The English name is derived from the Latin name camellia, named after the Czech-born missionary and botanist George Josef Kamel, whose name was originally derived from the word kamel, meaning “camel.” Carnation – (impulsiveness – joy – devotion – love – fascination – capriciousness) white carnation meaning (disdain – refusal) Carnations were used in Greek ceremonial crowns. The name carnation may come from the Greek carnis (flesh) and refer to the incarnation of God made flesh. The English name derived from the flower name, from French carnation, meaning “complexion,” from Italian carnagione, meaning “flesh-colored.” The carnation is also known as “the poor man’s rose.” Cattail – (prosperity – peace) Cattails or bulrushes, are wetland plants with spongy, strap-like leaves and creeping stems, the thick root can be ground to make a flour substitute. The spread of cattails assists the process of open water bodies being converted to vegetated marshland and eventually to dry land. Chamomile (action – movement – energy) The extract of German chamomile is taken as a strong tea and is used in herbal medicine as a digestive aid, it has anti-inflammatory properties. Chamomile tea is used to calm the nerves and chamomile makes an excellent mouthwash against mouth and gum infections. It is used in ointments and lotions and is very soothing. Cherry Blossom (learning – education) In China the cherry blossom is a symbol of feminine beauty, it represents the feminine principle and love. Falling blossoms symbolise fallen warriors who died in battle, and symbolise the samurai. Cherry blossoms in Japan symbolise the transience of life because of their short blooming times. Christmas Rose The Christmas rose is purported to have flowered on Christmas Day, thus associated with the infant Jesus. It is a member of the genus Helleborus and is not related to the rose bush. The Christmas Rose (sometimes known as the Lenten Rose) of Mary Gardens, bears pure white or pink flowers. Chrysanthemum – (wealth – optimism – cheerfulness – abundance) The name is derived from the feminine form of Greek (Chrysanthos), meaning “golden flower.” Chrysanthemums are associated with death in Italy. Colour meanings (white) truth, hope, rest and friendship, (red) love, (yellow) slighted love. The Japanese put a single chrysanthemum petal on the bottom of a wine glass to sustain a long and healthy life, and Japanese emperors sat on their Chrysanthemum throne. Crocus – (joy – happiness – cheerfulness) The genus crocus is in the iris family, the plants grow from corm, are mainly perennials and found in woodland and meadows, crocuses are native to central and southern Europe, North Africa, the Middle East, central Asia and China. Cyclamen – (goodbye – resignation) Cyclamen grow in dry forest or scrub areas, have white, bright pink, red or purple flowers, and are native to Africa and the Mediterranean. They are part of the primrose family, although bare no resemblance. Daffodil – (regard – chivalry – respect – unrequited love – sunshine – happiness) In Greek mythology the daffodil is described as a pale yellow deathless kind of lily flower, that overspreads the plains of Hades, and is the favourite food of the dead. The traditional daffodil has a yellow to golden-yellow color all over, and due to breeding the daffodil may be variously colored. Breeders have developed some daffodils with double, triple, or ambiguously multiple rows of petals, and several wild species have double variants. The English name is derived from the flower name, from Latin asphodelus, from Greek asphodelos, meaning “asphodel flower.” Dandelion (nature’s oracle) In Medieval times the dandelion was called lion’s teeth, because its leaves had jagged tooth like edges. The dandelion has for centuries been consulted as an oracle, the time can be told by the number of blows to get rid of the seeds. For a prophecy about how long it is until your wedding day, count the number of seeds left after you have blown on them once, the number of seeds left tells you how many years it will be. Dahlia – (forever – dignity – elegance – forever thine) The dahlia was used as a food source in the 1940?s by the Europeans, when the French potato crop was destroyed by disease. The dahlia is named after Anders Dahl, the 18th century Swedish botanist. The English name is derived from the flower name, taken from the surname of Anders Dahl, meaning “valley,” from this “dahlia flower” or “valley flower. The Aztecs used dahlias to treat epilepsy. Daisy – (feelings shared – innocence – purity – beauty – simplicity – loyalty – love) also known as (“flowery mead”) The English name is derived from the flower name, from Old English daegeseage, “day’s eye. “ Hairpins decorated with daisies were found during the excavation of the Minoan Palace on the Island of Crete, and daisies are believed to be several thousand years old. Egyptian ceramics were decorated with daisies. Maidens grabbed a bunch of daises with their eyes closed, then counted them to find out how many years until they were to marry. Originally known as ‘bruisword’, and used to heal bruises. It is considered good luck to step on the first daisy of the year Dandelion – (affection requited – sympathy – happiness – love’s oracle – faithfulness – desire) The dandelion is native to Europe and Asia, in northern areas and places where the dandelion is not native, it has become a weed. Day Lily – (forgetting worries) in China (symbolic of devotion to mother) The flower means “Suited for A Boy,” it was used as a lucky talisman by expectant mothers who wished for a baby boy. “In China when the day lily has a cheerful position, the flower is called “Wong Yu.” Delphinium – (levity – ardent attachment – fun – light of heart – joyous) Delphinium derived from the French form of the Latin, Delphinia, meaning “woman from Delphi.” The flower resembles nose of the dolphin, and delphiums were thought to repel scorpions. The Native Americans used delphiniums to make blue dye and the Europeans made ink. Edelweiss – (courage – noble purity – daring) Edelweiss is a European mountain flower a member of the sunflower family, its flowers are felted and woolly with white hairs, the characteristic bloom consists of five to six small yellow flower heads surrounded by leaflets. The name edelweiss is German, edel (noble) and weiss (white). Fern – (shelter – discretion – secret bond of love – confidence – fascination – magic – reverie) Ferns do not have seeds or flowers, but reproduce by spores. There are about 12,000 varieties  worldwide, and fern is derived from Old English fear, meaning “fern,” a type of leafy plant. Flower and plant names were popular in the 19th century and the name was first used then. Forget me not (never forget me) Forget-me-not the flower symbolism associated with the forget-me-not is true love and memories. In 15th century Germany, it was supposed that the wearers of the flower would not be forgotten by their lovers. In a medieval legend, a knight and his lady were walking along the side of a river, he picked a posy of flowers, but because of the weight of his armour he fell into the river, as he was drowning he threw the posy to his loved one and shouted “Forget-me-not”. It is also told in pious legend that the Christ child was sitting on Mary’s lap one day and said that he wished that future generations could see them. He touched her eyes and then waved his hand over the ground and blue forget-me-nots appeared. Forget me nots acquired the name when a knight leapt into the river Danube to get a pretty blue flower for his lady, it was floating on the water and she was sad it may be swept away by the water. Tragically the current dragged the knight down, he threw his lady the flower before he drowned, crying, “Forget me not.” The lady wore the flowers in her hair ever after to always remember him. It is said that forget me nots planted on the grave of someone you love, will never die as long as you live. Blue and pink flowers are found on the same stem, blue  for boys and pink for girls. Forget me nots are given as a symbol of remembrance. Foxglove – (youth – stateliness) Foxglove is symbolic of both healing and harm, foxglove flowers have both positive and negative symbolic meanings. The scientific name is digitalis, a reference to the presence of extremely powerful chemicals used to treat heart conditions when correctly administered. However if taken in large amounts it is deadly. Fuchsia – (love) Fuchsia flowers are a delicate teardrop shape and grow in profusion throughout summer and autumn, tropical species grow all year round. Hummingbirds are attracted to the glorious red sepals and beautiful purple petals. Gardenia – (secret love – refinement – beauty – purity) meaning (“garden flower”) Gardenia plants have a strong sweet scent, the flower can be very large in some species. Gardenias are native to Asia, Australasia, Oceana and Africa, they also grow in Hawaii. Geranium – (friendship-folly-stupidity-meeting) The temperate regions of the world and tropical mountains are where the geranium will be found. The genus name is derived from the Greek word geranos, meaning “crane”. The appearance of the geraniums seed-heads are the same shape as the bill of a crane. Gladiolus – (strength – astounding beauty – preparedness – love at first sight) The stem base (corms) of the gladiolus were made into a poultice for thorns and splinters and used for it’s healing properties. The name gladiolus comes from the sword or “gladius” shape leaves.  The gladiolus symbolised the Roman gladiators. Globe Amaranth – (unfading love) The globe amaranth is an annual plant that grows up to 24 inches in height, it is a genus of plants in the Amaranthaceae family. The true species of globe amaranth has magenta flowers, then there are garden varieties with purple, white, red, lilac and pink. Hawthorn – (hope) and (May) The hawthorn is a pagan symbol for life, in Devon it is considered unlucky as the fairies might cast a spell on you if you sit under a hawthorn. The hawthorn is believed to be haunted by fairies and is sometimes called ‘Fairy Thorn.’ Farmers believed hawthorn was lucky and would hang it outside the cowsheds so the cows would give plenty of milk. The hawthorn flowers in May. Mandrake (the Magician) The mandrake or mandragora, is one of the most important hallucinogens in Western Europe and the Near East, in over two millennia. It is a flowering plant that can give life or cause death, depending on its use. The mandrake has many uses and has been a favourite of apothecaries, witches considered it indispensable and used it for spells and healing. Apothecaries and witches used mandrake when they wished to make a particularly strong potion. In order for Odysseus to withstand the magic of Circe, Hermes gave the mandrake to him. Herbalist shops in the early twentieth century, situated in the less affluent areas of London, sold mandrake. Many women who owned mandrakes fed and clothed them, these women were accused of being  witches and burnt at the stake by the Inquisition. The mandrake was dressed in expensive cloth, bathed several times a year, given food to eat, water to drink, and considered human. The mandrake is considered part plant, part human and imbued with magical powers. The mandrake exudes a strong, unusual but pleasant scent. It is a perennial with a strange appearance, it has broad leaves with white, yellow or purple flower, the fruit is similar to a plum. The root is black, forked and a foot long, with the semblence of human male form with a penis, a subsidiary root which sticks out. When a mandrake is being pulled out it shrieks like a person, and a black dog is used to pull it out, as the mandrake shrieks the dog dies. The mandrake has pharmacological effects as a pain killer, erotica, a sleep inducer, during the transition between consciousness and sleep it causes hallucinations. A technique used in Turkey was to extract the mandrake root and cut it to manipulate its shape, then to apply pressure bandages and replant it in the ground. When next extracted after more growth, no one could tell it was crafted by hands other than nature. Six mandrakes of this nature were created and exhibited by Von Luschan, in 1891. He declared that a clever artist could create figures that looked genuine, and no one would know they were not nature’s gift. These treasures were so rare it was a life threatening undertaking to obtain one, they were valuable talismans and were extremely expensive. Hibiscus – (delicate beauty) Hibiscus is a large genus containing over 200 species, butterflies and bees are attracted to it. Hibiscus tea is a soothing tea enjoyed by many, it is also considered a healing tonic. Holly Symbolism Symbolism associated with the holly is defense, domestic happiness and forecast. The Romans decorated their hallways with holly garlands for their mid-winter celebration, Saturnalia. Medieval monks called the holly the Holy Tree and believed holly would keep away evil spirits and protect their homes from lightening. The pointed leaves represented the crown of thorns worn by Jesus, and the red berries symbolised drops of his blood. Honeysuckle – (love – loving bonds) The wood of the honeysuckle contains nepetalactone, which is the active ingredient found in catnip. Some species of honeysuckle have bell-shaped flowers, honeysuckle is a twining flower grown in China, North America and Europe. Huckleberry – (faith – simple pleasures) Due to the size of the tiny huckleberries, they were used to refer to something small, often as a term of endearment. The phrase “a huckleberry over my persimmon,” meaning “a bit beyond my abilities”. “I’ll be your huckleberry,” meaning “I am the person for the job.” Hyacinth – (games – rashness – playfulness – joy – sports – rebirth) derived from the Latin form of Greek (hyakinthos.) The hyacinth flower is used in the Haftseen table setting, in honour of the Persian New Year celebrations.  Hyacinths are named after Hyacinth, a figure in Greek mythology, a youth who was loved and accidentally killed by Apollo. The hyacinth flower sprouted from his blood, and hyacinths are often associated with rebirth. Impatiens – (motherly love) Impatiens planted in the medieval Mary gardens, gardens devoted to the Virgin Mary, were called “Our Lady’s earings.” Impatiens flowers come in many forms, some orchid shaped, others with flat flowers. They are thought of as a sacred flower. Iris – (wisdom – faith – friendship – to cherish – valor – hope – love’s promise) Iris is the name of a mythological rainbow goddess, the Greek meaning is  “rainbow.” The Iris is the emblem of France and Florence. Iris is used by the English as a feminine name, it is used by a male or female, by those of Jewish heritage. Irises were used in Mary Gardens, and the blade-shaped foliage symbolises the sorrows which ‘pierced her heart.’ Ivy – (weddings – Christmas – fidelity – friendship – affection) Ivy is a strong climbing vine, used by many for garden walls and for garden decoration, ivy climbing the walls of a home, conjures visions or romance and country cottages. Ivy adds a particular charm, a smoothly cemented wall is impenetrable to the climbing roots of ivy and ivy can  protect the walls from the weather. Jasmine – (sensuality – grace – elegance – attachment – modesty) Jasmine is known for its potent fragrance and jasmine is used in some of the world’s oldest and most beautiful scents. Widely cultivated for its flowers and immensely popular as a climbing, fragrant cover in a garden. No one can miss the potent scent of jasmine flowers wafting through the home. In southeast and southern Asia, women adorn their hair with jasmine. Many people enjoy jasmine tea, and it is frequently used by those involved in healing, some use it as a preventative medicine. Derived from the Persian yasmin, meaning “jasmine flower.” Lady’s Mantle The symbolism  associated with The Lady’s Mantle, is as a cloak for the Blessed Virgin, and it was grown in the Mary Gardens. Dew is associated with magic, and the dew that collects on the lady’s mantle, is named alchemilla “little magical one.” People stuffed their pillows with it to ensure a good night’s sleep, the dew was used as a beauty lotion. Lilac – (pride – youth – innocence – beauty) The colour lilac comes from the beautiful pale purple colour of the lilac flower. Lilacs are also white, pale yellow, pink or burgundy and are known for their strong, heady perfume like scent. Lilac became popular in England because of its femininity, it is the state flower of New Hampshire and lilacs grow on trees or shrubs. Lily – (chastity – fleur-de-lis – faith – wisdom – Holy Trinity – chivalry – royalty – fertility) In both pagan and Christian traditions, lilies symbolise fertility, depending on the type of lily there are many meanings. Calla lily beauty, China lily mother, orange lily hatred, tiger lily wealth- pride, white lily purity, virginity, sweetness, virginity majesty, it’s heavenly to be with you. Yellow lily gaiety, gratitude, I’m light as a feather, happiness. In Greek marriage ceremonies the bride wears a crown of lilies. In religious terms the lily symbolises the annunciation of the birth of Jesus by the angel Gabriel. In both Christian and pagan traditions lilies symbolise fertility. Lotus – (forgotten past – estranged love) meaning Hebrew lowt (“covering, veil”) The lotus is known as the “sacred water lily” in Buddhism and Hinduism. Lotus roots are widely used in Asian cuisine and the lotus is the national flower of India, and the blue or Indian lotus, is known as the bean of India. The English name is derived from the flower name, from Latin lotus and from Greek lotus, and the Egyptian “white lotus.” Lupine – (imagination) meaning “lupinus” (“of wolves”) The name derived from the belief of ancient peoples, that lupines robbed the soil of nutrients, in reality lupines add nitrogen to the soil. The lupine blossoms exude a delicious fragrance of honey, and the Karner blue butterfly’s caterpillar, gets it’s nourishment from lupines, its only food source. Magnolia – (love – nature – nobility – perseverance) The Magnolia’s abundance in Mississippi is reflected in its state nickname, the “Magnolia State”, it is also the state flower of Louisiana. The abundance of Magnolia Trees growing along Buffalo Bayou, in Houston, Texas, led to the nickname “The Magnolia City.” Marigold – (passion -creativity)  known as (Mary’s Gold ), referred to as (“golden gifts”) and (“Herb of the Sun”) Marigolds were given as religious offerings to the Virgin, usually by the poor who could not afford to give actual gold, and they were used in Mary Gardens. The English name derives from the flower name, Mary, meaning “the Mother Ray,” and the word “gold” (Marigold). Marigolds have been used as love charms, in rituals and worn as talismans. Marigold flowers added to pillows encourage prophetic or psychic dreams. They are also a favourite with brides, who have them woven into wedding garlands. Marjoram – (happiness – joy) also called (sweet majoram) Marjoram is cultivated for its fragrant leaves, either green or dry it is used in  cooking. It does not like the cold and is an under shrub, with citrus flavours and sweet pine. As marjoram begins to flower the tops are cut and dried in the shade. Healers often used marjoram in their concoctions. Morning Glory – (affection) Morning glory flowers are funnel-shaped and open in the morning, this is the time of day they are pollinated by bees, hummingbirds, butterflies, birds and insects. New flowers bloom each day as the life span of the flower is only one morning, in the afternoon the morning glory dies. Narcissus – (normality – sweetness – vanity – self-esteem) from the Greek Narkissos meaning (numbness – sleep) The name narcissus is derived from Greek mythology, and the recounts the tale of a young man named Narcissus, who knelt by the river bank and gazed into a pool of water. Narcissus  became so obsessed with his own reflection, he fell into the water and drowned. From the spot where Narcissus died, the narcissus grew. Nasturtium – (victory – battle – conquest), nasturtium (“nose-twister”) or (“nose-tweaker”) In some countries the nasturtium leaves are used as food, the name Tropaeolum majus, is Latin for trophy, a reference to war. Nasturtium have showy, often intensely bright flowers and rounded, shield-shaped leaves. Orange Blossom – (innocence, fruitfulness – marriage – innocence – good fortune) Orange blossom is the state flower of Florida, and a favourite of brides either to carry or wear in their hair and is used for headresses. Citrus-scented rosewater is made from the petals of orange blossom. Orange blossom water is used as a common additive to food in various cultures. Orchid – (charm – maturity – love – beauty – children – thoughtfulness) The English name comes from the flower name, from Greek orkhis, meaning “testicle,” from Proto-Indo-European orghi, given its name because of the shape of its root. The orchid’s popularity remains constant. Pansy – called the “heartsease” or “Johnny Jump Up – (merriment – thoughtfulness) The name pansy is from the French word pensée meaning “thought,” named so because the flower resembles a human face. Each year in August, as though it is in deep thought, the pansy nods. Peony Flower Symbolism Peony flower symbolism the flower symbolism associated with the peony is happy marriage, compassion and bashfulness. Peonies are extensively grown as ornamental plants for their very large, often scented flowers. The English name is derived from the flower name, peony, which was named after the physician god Paeon because the flower was formerly used in medicine. Peonies tend to attract ants to the flower buds due to the nectar that forms. Peonies are herbaceous plants or woody shrubs with red, white or yellow flowers. Petunia – (soothing) The petunia Capital of the world, is Dixon, Illinois, where the Petunia Festival is held. All the streets are lined with petunias. Petunia’s are related to chillis, tobacco and tomatoes Poinsettia – (purity – celebration – Christmas) Poinsettias are also known as the “Christmas flower” and “Mexican flame leaf.” Poinsettias originally came from Mexico and Central America. A Christmas legend tells the tale of a poverty stricken child, too poor to buy a present for the Christ child, who plucked a weed from the side of the road. The plant magically blossomed into red and green flowers just as he entered the church. Poppy – (beauty – magic – consolation – fertility – eternal life) Poppies were used by the Egyptians to decorate burial tombs, and for funerals. Poppies are synonymous with sleep and rest. Poppies were used by the Greeks in the shrines of the goddess of fertility, Demeter, and the goddess of the hunt, Diana. Poppies are an emblem of those who died in World War I. Pussy Willow (motherhood) Pussy willows sprout during the first signs of spring, and if picked just as the buds expend in spring it can last indefinitely when dried. They are a popular flower to be used in the home for decoration. Rhododendron – (caution – beware – be alert) (rhododendron means “rose tree” The rhododendron’s symbolism is caution, beware, be alert, this is due to its properties which are toxic to animals, it is also a hallucogen and affects humans as a laxative. There are over a thousand species of rhododendrons, and It is the state flower of West Virginia, Washington USA, and the national flower of Nepal. Rose – (love – remembrance – beauty) The rose is always associated with love and romance, the meaning of roses red/passion, white/purity, pink/happiness, be careful who you give a yellow rose to yellow/infidelity. Roses were introduced to Europe during the Roman Empire and predominantly used for decoration.  Roses were first cultivated 5,000 years ago in Asian gardens, and Confucius declared that the emperor of China owned more than 600 books on the cultivation of roses. It is thought that the name Rose is a short form of a Germanic name which contained the word. Roses are emblems of England and New York City, it is thought the name rose has Germanic origins. Shamrock (good luck – the luck of the Irish – lightheartedness – good fortune) The shamrock is a symbol of the Republic of Ireland, and symbolic of St. Patrick’s Day, with its traditional celebration on 17th March. In Victorian times it was used for its medicinal properties, it was also displayed in homes for luck. Snapdragon Flower Symbolism The flower symbolism associated with snapdragons is graciousness and strength. The snapdragon is important as a model organism in botanical research, its genome has been studied in detail. The name literally means “like a nose” in Ancient Greek. Snapdragons are perennials that do best in full or partial sun. Sunflower – (adoration – haughtiness) Sunflowers belong to the genus helianthus (a reference to the sun god, Helios) they turn their heads to the sun, the origin of their name. Sunflowers are native to the Americas and are the state flower of Kansas, when cultivated they can reach a height of twenty feet, and is known as one of the fastest growing plants in the world. Sweet Pea – (bliss – pleasure – farewell – adieu – leaving – thank you) Sweet peas were the emblem for Edwardian England, and were an extremely popular flower in the late 1800s. As sweet peas are associated with the month of April they are a lovely gift for someone who’s birthday falls in this month. Tulip – (fame – perfect love) – (the national symbol of Holland) – (in Latin “tulipa”) Red tulips mean “believe me,” and they are a declaration of love, variegated tulips mean “you have beautiful eyes.” Cream tulips mean “I will love you forever.” Verbena – (sensibility – prayer) )(native to the American continent and Europe Healers have been using Verbena in potions and tonics for centuries, it is most often  used as a tea. It is grown as a honey plant, supplying bees with nectar. Verbena has been used by apothecaries and healers, verbena is also used as a protection against vampires. Violet – (faithfulness – happiness – love – virtue – modesty – loving watchfulness) – derived from the Latin word “viola” meaning (“violet colour”) of (“violet flower”). The beautiful violet is often used in cooking and works especially well as a chocolate filling, or for toppings, and delectable desserts are made using essence of violet flowers. The violet flower is often used for decorating the dinner table because of its vivid colouring. Wisteria – (named after the eighteenth century Philadelphia physician, Caspar Wistar), meaning – (spontaneity – welcoming – playfulness) Wisteria is named  the “Purple Vine” in China, the petals shade from the strong dark purple tip, to the light pink at the open base. Any support is suitable for the steadily climbing Wisteria vines that wind themselves either clockwise or counter clockwise. Zinnia – (Named after the German botanist Johann Zinn), meaning – affection -constancy – goodness – remembrance – friendship. Zinnias were discovered in the early 1500s in the Mexican wilderness, because of their unattractive appearance, their Aztec name meant “eyesore.” They are the state flower of Indiana. After the zinnia went through a metamorphosis, the name Cinderella was often used. In the 1930s a young Harley Street doctor, named Edward Bach, gave up his lucrative practice as a physician, in order to follow and apply the teachings of Paracelsus, who was a magician with herbs and plants. Edward Bach was committed to finding a way of healing that was gentle, pain free, natural and would restore mind and body. Bach searched the English countryside and the mountains of Wales, certain he would find wildflowers that contained the secret ingredients to heal mind, body and spirit. He believed it was a person’s state of mind that caused illness, by disturbing the natural balance of tissues and organs. Bach believed that by using plants and flowers with high vibrations, the lowered vibrations of the individual would be lifted, thus restoring balance and health. He said, “Herbal remedies have the power to elevate our vibrations, and draw down spiritual power, which cleanses mind and body, and heals.” With his exceptional understanding, Bach was able to touch any plant and feel the power and vibrations it emitted. He then grouped the plants according to the type of healing they were offering, whether it be to ease the pain of a headache, an injury or to restore vitality or as an aid for nausea or tiredness. He chose the plants for their mental, physical and spiritual, healing properties. Edward Bach produced thirty eight remedies and wrote about his work, so that people would understand what flower remedy to use for their ailment. Individuals around the world attested to the efficacy of his natural remedies, and Bach flower remedies are still used worldwide.

[wp-yahoo-style-1042-yahoopa-blog]

A Tennessee Yarn Store Doesn’t Want Women’s March Supporters as Its Customers

Elizabeth Poe, the owner of the Joy of Knitting in Franklin, Tenn. — located just outside Nashville — is not here for your pink pussy hats.

On Tuesday, Poe posted on the shop’s Facebook page that following this past weekend’s Women’s March on Washington, D.C., she would prefer that participants and supporters of the protest and its efforts not patronize her shop.

“The vulgarity, vile and evilness of this movement is absolutely despicable. That kind of behavior is unacceptable and is not welcomed at The Joy of Knitting. I will never need that kind of business to remain open,” Poe writes. “As the owner of this business and a Christian, I have a duty to my customers and my community to promote values of mutual respect, love, compassion, understanding, and integrity. The women’s movement is counterproductive to unity of family, friends, community, and nation.”

She concludes her note, “I do pray for these women. May God work out His love in their hearts and continue to heal and unite Americans.”

The backlash, however, has been intense and swift, with thousands of comments filling the Joy of Knitting’s Facebook page voicing feelings otherwise. Within two days, more than 9,000 comments had been left on Poe’s original post.

“Oh, Elizabeth, honey, you are living in a fool’s paradise. Your beloved president is a liar, a cheat, a thief and a sociopath, and if he isn’t removed from office he will plunge us into war or a nuclear holocaust,” wrote one commenter.

One individual who sounded off, an ordained minister, weighed in as well, saying, “I’m an ordained minister and pastor a church. I literally read the Gospel every day. I doubt you do, because if you did, you would know that standing up for justice for the oppressed, equality, and healing were the central messages of Jesus. Those were also the goals of the Women’s Marches. Also, your president says he likes to grab women by the p***y, and you don’t think that’s vulgar, but you do think women knitting pink hats shaped like cat heads is vulgar?!?! I’m praying for you. You obviously have a lot of hate for women and yourself.”

In reply to the thousands of haters, Poe shared, “Please, this is not going to be used as a platform to hash out your beliefs v. my beliefs. I said my peace. I am sorry that you don’t agree with my policy. I am certainly willing to live with my decision.”

In response to Poe’s response, one commenter wrote, “No — you made this a platform when you posted this. You cannot spew your hatefulness then say no one can disagree with you. Keep your opinions to yourself if you don’t want others to express theirs as well. Praise the lord — you Faux Christian.”

“You hashed out your personal beliefs on this platform so why can’t your followers? That’s the same attitude come from the Trump administration; your thoughts matter but ours doesn’t? How can you expect to drop such political napalm in your business page and not expect your customers, many of whom you just alienated with such words, to push back? With an ‘us vs them’ attitude, how can any of us coexist? Curious to your thoughts on this,” wrote another.

Poe has also since commented to clarify that she did indeed mean to say that she’s said her “peace” and not said her “piece,” after the first was used in place of the latter in her post.

“As a Christian, could you operate your business by showing the love of Jesus to all? Even those you disagree with?” wrote one commenter who got a reply from Poe.

Poe wrote back, “I will not support the platform these women have chosen to advance their cause. Parading around in a vagina costume degrades all women. Trashing the streets with their ugly signs undermines their efforts. They have shown much ugliness with the toxiccomments [sic]. They prove my point. My business is thriving. I have many men, women, gays and lesbians that are regulars. The march degraded them too. This march really set the movement back. Not good.”

Meanwhile, Virginia Johnson, the owner of Gather Here in Cambridge, Mass., a shop that held knit-a-long events for pussy hat makers for the Women’s March, posted Thursday on her shop’s blog about her own experience participating in the D.C. protest.

“I (Virginia) was fortunate enough to march with my friends on Saturday, January 21, 2017 in Washington, D.C.,” Johnson writes. “We saw so many people wearing pink hats. Some had been sewn. Some crocheted. Some made from recycled sweaters and felted. Handmade. Hand-stitched. I felt pride in our fiber community. Similar to when we all decided to make comfort quilts for Pulse Nightclub victims and their families. Or the Quilts for Boston campaign. Here is a community that will stitch all night for someone, likely a total stranger, so they can exercise their right to assemble and march for women’s rights/human rights/refugee rights/healthcare. Sure, there are some that wish the hats weren’t pink but let me tell you, *we* could be seen. The power of handmade glowed in all of those aerial shots of the marches in cities across the world.”

She concludes, “So in the aftermath, when ‘they’ question how we could have churned out that many pink (and red, mauve, raspberry, blush, pinot, plum, azalea, and every magenta shade on the spectrum) hats, do NOT let them strip you of your pride. You have every reason to be proud of this moment. You have every right to be proud of what YOU MADE WITH YOUR HANDS. And I can’t wait to see what you’ll make next. I have no doubt the energy and focus we channeled into pussy hats will be directed towards major change — this wasn’t a moment, it was a movement. I believe in YOU.”

As of publication, Poe had not yet replied to Yahoo Style’s request for comment.

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[corruptionofteller]

29. Sunday Dinner

Scarlet

They say there is a first time for everything and this was certainly a first for her at least. The closest Scarlet had come to a family dinner was eating leftover take out with her mother passed out in the bathroom with the needle still in her arm. The concept of family took on a whole new meaning with her new Charming life. She felt like she was standing on a wobbling fence overlooking both sides. One being a sad lonely life where Scarlet had to be the adult since the age of 8, only god knows how she made it alive as a toddler on her own. Then the other side being one of unity, where family came first but was also held up on a pile of secrets only each time one was taken out and opened it seemed to pull the family closer together. Take Scarlet’s mother for example. With her brief visit, the secret of just how horrible her life had really been became clear to so many. It made something in Gemma snap, which annoyed Scarlet because she wasn’t used to the matriarch being kind. Joanna apparently woke up and went straight to the bar. Scarlet didn’t know the details but she was told Gemma took care of it.

“I don’t know if I can do a whole sit down dinner with your mom babe.” Scarlet walked up behind Jax in the restroom, kissing the middle of his back, earning a chuckle from him. His hands reached around giving her ass a light tap, looking at her from the reflection in the mirror.

“You can…you just don’t want to. Besides everyone will be there. It will be good for us all to have some time off from club shit.” Turning around his hand was placed on her hip and he lightly kissed her cheek, giving her stomach a gentle rub.

“I know it will be. I think I am just nervous because, well, this is new to me.” She turned the water on, wetting her toothbrush to start getting ready.

  Jax

Jax was quite aware that this new found sense of family was very unfamiliar to Scarlet and he wanted nothing more than for her to feel wanted and loved. The sit down dinner Gemma had planned after Scarlet’s mother’s departure he thought to be a great idea and a way to show his ol’ lady just what family truly meant. Even in the life of disorder, loss, fear and hate there was still some good in their existence and the people that surrounded them, whether through the family they were given or the family they had chosen. Jax, for the first time in his adult life, wanted to give Scarlet the world, everything she was worthy of and more.

The woman completed him. When he was ready to crumble and give up under the weight of his responsibilities she was there to pick him up and force him to realize just who he was and what he needed to do. He didn’t have that with Wendy; his marriage to her was only to end the loneliness he felt despite the constant stream of female company that occupied his bed. The two didn’t know what it meant to be in love; Jax’s real love was the club while Wendy was having a love affair with the needle in her vein. Then there was Tara; his high school sweetheart, the fairytale that every teenager believes in but as much as he loved the young doctor, there was always a hesitation between them. Tara hated the MC, the part of him that made him whole and intact just as her love of medicine did for her. She wanted him but she did not want was the root of his last name and his legacy. She never learned to love the club just as she loved the man. He knew deep in his dark, troublesome soul that, had she not perished accidentally, their relationship would have eventually fizzled away. Through the failed relationships in the past, Jax had apprehension and the willingness to give up on the theory of love and the idea of two people spending their lives together. To grow old, watch the children they brought into the world become adults and move on with their own lives. After losing Tara to her own fate he had resorted to the realization that night after night with a different whore in his bed was what his life was meant to be outside of the duties of club president. That was until Scarlet Delaney was placed smack dab in front of him just waiting for him to love her.

“Nothin’ wrong with being nervous, babe. But remember, it’s /your/ family too.” With a flicker of his eye in a wink he sidestepped passed Scarlet as she leaned over the sink to brush her teeth. His eyes averted to the bump that was pressed against the porcelain making a smile tug his lips upwards in a smile. Even with all the doubts he still had with creating another life to attempt to bring up and mold into a decent human being, the thought of becoming a dad again still made him happy. There were few things in the biker’s life that brought happiness anymore but when he thought of Scarlet, Abel and the baby she was carrying he knew all the bad shit he did was worth it to have the good he had in his life.

Shuffling across the hall Jax entered the bedroom he and Scarlet now shared as their own. She had taken it upon herself to do a little decorating and he welcomed it; having the remnants of Tara removed was a breath of fresh air in a sense. He would never forget her and he often had his moments that he mourned his late wife, but the constant reminder wasn’t needed. Tara was right where she needed to be; embedded in one part of his heart where she would remain.

“Babe…you seen my blue hoodie?” He flipped through the multiple flannel shirts that hung in the closet, growing annoyed when the only thing he wanted was nowhere to be found. The towel clung to his waist as the small droplets of water fell from the ends of his hair to his shoulder and made a trail down over the ink of his son’s name etched in his skin. Exhaling a heavy breath he took one more look through the hanging garments as Scarlet entered the room.

“Jackson. Really? It’s a family dinner and you are planning on going in a hoodie?” The rough exterior Scarlet once displayed had taken a change once life began to grow inside her. Sometimes he liked that side of her, other times he just wanted the Scarlet she was when they first met. He was naive to the fact that as relationships evolved things changed and just like change for the MC, it was good in the union of him and his ol’ lady.

“We’re going to Gemma’s. I’m not meetin’ the damn queen babe.” He laughed, the corner of his eyes catching the handsome young boy that mirrored him as a child. “Hey buddy…”

“Daddy, can I take my bear to gramma’s?” Abel had the raggedy old bear squeezed in his arms, the stuffed animal that Jax himself had as a kid. The poor toy was way past it’s prime but it was still his son’s favorite comfort toy just like some children need a blanket to pacify them.

“Of course ya can little man. You look very handsome, you all ready to go?” Jax reached out to ruffle his hair as he usually would only to get a look from Scarlet that said ‘Make me brush his hair again I’ll stab you’. He pulled his hand back and replaced it with one of his signature smiles.

“Mhmmm daddy. Scarlet, can I watch some cartoons?” Abel turned to his new mother figure and asked politely.

“Just until your father gets ready.” She offered the little boy one of her own pleasant smiles before he ran off down the hall with his bear.

“Sure, make it seem like I’m the slow one, babe.” He said in his deep, gravelly voice as he yanked one of the dark blue flannel shirts from the hanger and pulled a clean pair of jeans from the dresser drawer. Making sure the door was closed he dropped the towel and started to get dressed while his ol’ lady did the same.

[One hour later, Gemma’s house]

With a mad dash, Abel ran full force up the walkway lined with colorful flowers and forever green bushes, busting through the door before Jax and Scarlet’s feet had even left the inside of the car. It wasn’t very often Jax went anywhere that wasn’t on his Harley but in some cases an exception needed to be made. Reaching out his fingers linked with the beautiful, glowing brunette as he led her up the same path his son had just taken. The driveway was lined with bikes, a few vehicles scattered at the edges of the road Gemma lived on. They didn’t have many gatherings away from the clubhouse but as he and Scarlet neared the glass paned front door, it felt right and it felt needed. A small piece of normalcy for a change and he was going to welcome and embrace it.

“There’s my favorite grandson!” Abel leaped into Gemma’s arms just as Jax released Scarlet’s hand and held the door open for her to enter his mother’s house.

“I’m your only grandson, gramma.” Abel countered.

Stepping in behind his ol’ lady his eyes took a quick inventory of who was there; Bobby, Juice, Unser, Chibs…to the left stood Nero leaning against the dark oak cupboards. Already at the table sat Tig, ready and waiting for the meal to be served. Rat appeared with Brooke in tow, Jax guessed he had been out giving the azaleas cancer. Lyla, Piper, even Kenny and Ellie were in attendance. Jax’s thoughts drifted back to when they had done this when Opie and Donna were alive and it caused a sudden lump to lodge in his throat that he fought to swallow it down.

“Hey baby.” Gemma kissed Jax’s cheek as she held Abel in her arms, his bear not leaving his side. It was only when he discovered the other children that Abel wiggled his way free so he could run off to play before they were rounded up for dinner.

“Hey ma. Smells fuckin’ good in here.” With a slow inhale Jax took in the delicious scent of turkey baking in the oven that was consuming the entire inside of the house.

“You think I was cooking some kind of shit Jackson? Of course it smells good.” Gemma chuckled a soft laugh as she moved to Scarlet and cupped her warm cheeks in her aged hands and placed a kiss to her forehead. “Hey sweetheart. How you feeling today?” Before moving completely away, the matriarch made sure to use both hands to give Scarlet’s now very pregnant belly a generous rub. “And how’s our newest little biker or biker princess doing in there?”

  Scarlet

“Using Mommy’s insides like a playground. Doctor says the baby is as healthy as can be expected” Scarlet’s tone rang proudly walking into the house, her eyes scanning around the house nervously. She was used to seeing everyone around the clubhouse but all at once in a house made her skittish. Gemma smiled leading the way to the kitchen where everyone was gathered laughing and talking.

Jax was greeting everyone with Scarlet in tow, one hand placed lovingly on her stomach. One by one each person cheerfully brought Scarlet into a welcoming hug, hands touched and teased her extended belly. Each one relaxing her more and more. The air was filled with love. She paused for a moment to take in the surroundings of the house. This was something she never had, an experience she desperately wanted to be passed on to her unborn son or daughter.

Scarlet followed Gemma into the kitchen where a turkey was pulled out from the oven. She stood leaned against the frame of the hallway, watching all the ol’ ladies help in the kitchen. A sudden realization came over the young mother to be. She has never had a proper thanksgiving dinner. She wouldn’t know the head from the ass of a turkey let alone be able to cook one. Her eyes found Gemma who was finishing up a cranberry sauce.

“Come here sweetheart.” Gemma smiled warmly at Scarlet. Assuming there was a task for her to be done as her part of the ol’ lady duties but when she approached Gemma, an arm draped over her shoulder, a soft kiss was placed on the top of Scarlet’s head by the original old lady. “You’re home baby. Now go find a seat. We got this. There will be plenty of time for you to help out in this kitchen.”

Scarlet felt a pinch in her chest. She was slightly overwhelmed, appreciative but overwhelmed. Watching Gemma stir the sauce for a moment she did something she never thought she would do. She turned to Gemma and kissed her cheek. “Thanks Mom.” Gemma paused, shocked by the gesture but Scarlet walked away before she could react.

When Scarlet turned she caught Jax grinning, watching the moment between Scarlet and his mother unfold. He seemed relieved by it. Her eyes rolled at him walking up to him the both laughing as if there was some sort of inside joke between the two. His hands roamed down her sides looking down into her eyes, each of them consumed in their love.

Jax’s hand rubbed Scarlet’s very round belly, his other brushing the loose strands of hair from her face tucking them behind her ear. Suddenly his eyes widen and he took a shocked step back. Jax glanced down at her stomach then to her. “Our baby wants to say hello to you.”

Scarlet softly laughed at his realization that he was feeling his youngest child move. Both hands placed back on her stomach as he took in the special moment.

  Jax

The rustling of chairs moving as people took a seat at the table and kids playfully laughing at the smaller table off to the side consumed the dining area of his mother’s house. But in that moment Jax was actually consumed by the realization that there was in fact a growing child inside of his ol’ lady. His eyes welled up with emotion but he fought it back. He never had these special moments with Wendy when she was carrying Abel; he hated her for getting pregnant, wanted nothing to do with the pregnancy and that was selfish on his part. He now regretted not having these moments with his oldest son and and as he looked to the little blond haired boy he felt an overwhelming sense of guilt for not being the father he needed to be before Abel even emerged into this realm we call life.

“Holy shit, you feel that?” His palm pressed firmly into the side of Scarlet’s rounded belly, asking the stupid question he already knew the answer to. But his excitement trumped his stupidity. Scarlet, along with some of the guys standing in close proximity, began to laugh.

“Fuck you guys.” The expectant father joined them in the laughter before prying his hand away from his ol’ lady’s belly to lead her to the table to eat.

The table was filled with food, turkey, all the trimmings, hell you’d think it was Christmas or some shit. The smell was enough to make your stomach growl and Jax’s did, just waiting to dig in. But before he could he knew his mother would have something to say just like she always did.

“Before we eat…” Gemma glanced to her left and smiled at Scarlet. “..I just want to say one thing. Scarlet, thank you for being part of our family, you have been since before you even knew us. Your ol’ man would be proud to see the woman you have become and embracing this way of life, sort of your own legacy. And thank you, from the bottom of my, sometimes dreary heart…” Everyone chuckled and tried not to laugh too hard, Gemma giving a look of daggers to the boys. “…As I was saying…thank you for making my son so happy. And of course…for giving me another grandchild!” Gemma clapped her hands together as if that was the best part of her entire speech and to her it probably was. “Now you can dig in!”

After finishing his meal Jax leaned back in his seat, his arm draped over the back of Scarlet’s chair, the other hand laid on his stomach almost mimicking where Scarlet’s was perched on her own, even if hers was due to the baby not from eating like a pig. “Damn ma, you outdid yourself. That was amazing.”

“We’re not finished yet, Jackson. Apple pie for dessert and…”She looked over at Abel as his eyes got big and round, hoping his grandmother was going to say something better than pie. “…chocolate cake!” Abel leaped from his seat in excitement. “I want cake gramma!”

“Wonderful, he’ll never sleep tonight, ma.” Jax chuckled, moving his hand to Scarlet’s belly for a quick rub, maybe secretly hoping to feel another kick.

“Well, why don’t you leave him here tonight? You and Scarlet could use some time together I’m sure.” The matriarch winked at her son as his mouth curled up in a smile. Scarlet had been taking on the motherly role for most of their new relationship and a break just the two of them would be refreshing.

“You sure, mom?”

“Jackson, do you really need to ask me that? Yes, I’m, sure. Now….let’s get dessert Abel.” She pushed away from her seat, Abel right behind her as he followed to the kitchen.

The boys began excusing themselves, needing their own dessert that didn’t require chocolate frosting or ice cream but a good ol’ dose of nicotine. Jax pushed away from his chair just as he felt a tug on his hand. His head turned and he looked down to Scarlet, her eyes flashing a sexy, seductive look that made him quickly realize a cigarette with the guys could wait. Taking her hand he helped her from her seat, her baby belly now making it a bit more difficult.

“I think we are going to call it a night then mom.” Jax leaned over and kissed the right side of his mother’s cheek. “Scarlet’s tired and I think I should take her home.”

“Alright baby.” Gemma returned Jax’s kiss before sidestepping to Scarlet. Her hands found their place on the pregnant belly as Scarlet received her own kiss to the cheek. “Thanks for coming sweetheart. Keep this little one safe and happy for us.” With a sincere smile Gemma stood back upright and once again looked at her son who had just given Abel his own hug and kiss goodnight. “Get them home safe Jackson, I’ll hold your ass responsible if anything happens to them.” Gemma’s tone went stern and Jax knew she meant every word she spoke.

“I will, mom. Goodnight.” He squeezed his hand around Scarlet’s as he lead them out of the house and to her car, ready to spend a relaxing night alone with his ol’ lady.

[jarlet-blog1]

31. Sunday Dinner ~ by Jax & Scarlet

Scarlet

They say there is a first time for everything and this was certainly a first for her at least. The closest Scarlet had come to a family dinner was eating leftover take out with her mother passed out in the bathroom with the needle still in her arm. The concept of family took on a whole new meaning with her new Charming life. She felt like she was standing on a wobbling fence overlooking both sides. One being a sad lonely life where Scarlet had to be the adult since the age of 8, only god knows how she made it alive as a toddler on her own. Then the other side being one of unity, where family came first but was also held up on a pile of secrets only each time one was taken out and opened it seemed to pull the family closer together. Take Scarlet’s mother for example. With her brief visit, the secret of just how horrible her life had really been became clear to so many. It made something in Gemma snap, which annoyed Scarlet because she wasn’t used to the matriarch being kind. Joanna apparently woke up and went straight to the bar. Scarlet didn’t know the details but she was told Gemma took care of it.

“I don’t know if I can do a whole sit down dinner with your mom babe.” Scarlet walked up behind Jax in the restroom, kissing the middle of his back, earning a chuckle from him. His hands reached around giving her ass a light tap, looking at her from the reflection in the mirror.

“You can...you just don’t want to. Besides everyone will be there. It will be good for us all to have some time off from club shit.” Turning around his hand was placed on her hip and he lightly kissed her cheek, giving her stomach a gentle rub.

“I know it will be. I think I am just nervous because, well, this is new to me.” She turned the water on, wetting her toothbrush to start getting ready.

Jax

Jax was quite aware that this new found sense of family was very unfamiliar to Scarlet and he wanted nothing more than for her to feel wanted and loved. The sit down dinner Gemma had planned after Scarlet’s mother’s departure he thought to be a great idea and a way to show his ol’ lady just what family truly meant. Even in the life of disorder, loss, fear and hate there was still some good in their existence and the people that surrounded them, whether through the family they were given or the family they had chosen. Jax, for the first time in his adult life, wanted to give Scarlet the world, everything she was worthy of and more.

The woman completed him. When he was ready to crumble and give up under the weight of his responsibilities she was there to pick him up and force him to realize just who he was and what he needed to do. He didn’t have that with Wendy; his marriage to her was only to end the loneliness he felt despite the constant stream of female company that occupied his bed. The two didn’t know what it meant to be in love; Jax’s real love was the club while Wendy was having a love affair with the needle in her vein. Then there was Tara; his high school sweetheart, the fairytale that every teenager believes in but as much as he loved the young doctor, there was always a hesitation between them. Tara hated the MC, the part of him that made him whole and intact just as her love of medicine did for her. She wanted him but she did not want was the root of his last name and his legacy. She never learned to love the club just as she loved the man. He knew deep in his dark, troublesome soul that, had she not perished accidentally, their relationship would have eventually fizzled away. Through the failed relationships in the past, Jax had apprehension and the willingness to give up on the theory of love and the idea of two people spending their lives together. To grow old, watch the children they brought into the world become adults and move on with their own lives. After losing Tara to her own fate he had resorted to the realization that night after night with a different whore in his bed was what his life was meant to be outside of the duties of club president. That was until Scarlet Delaney was placed smack dab in front of him just waiting for him to love her.

“Nothin’ wrong with being nervous, babe. But remember, it’s /your/ family too.” With a flicker of his eye in a wink he sidestepped passed Scarlet as she leaned over the sink to brush her teeth. His eyes averted to the bump that was pressed against the porcelain making a smile tug his lips upwards in a smile. Even with all the doubts he still had with creating another life to attempt to bring up and mold into a decent human being, the thought of becoming a dad again still made him happy. There were few things in the biker’s life that brought happiness anymore but when he thought of Scarlet, Abel and the baby she was carrying he knew all the bad shit he did was worth it to have the good he had in his life.

Shuffling across the hall Jax entered the bedroom he and Scarlet now shared as their own. She had taken it upon herself to do a little decorating and he welcomed it; having the remnants of Tara removed was a breath of fresh air in a sense. He would never forget her and he often had his moments that he mourned his late wife, but the constant reminder wasn’t needed. Tara was right where she needed to be; embedded in one part of his heart where she would remain.

“Babe...you seen my blue hoodie?” He flipped through the multiple flannel shirts that hung in the closet, growing annoyed when the only thing he wanted was nowhere to be found. The towel clung to his waist as the small droplets of water fell from the ends of his hair to his shoulder and made a trail down over the ink of his son’s name etched in his skin. Exhaling a heavy breath he took one more look through the hanging garments as Scarlet entered the room.

“Jackson. Really? It’s a family dinner and you are planning on going in a hoodie?” The rough exterior Scarlet once displayed had taken a change once life began to grow inside her. Sometimes he liked that side of her, other times he just wanted the Scarlet she was when they first met. He was naive to the fact that as relationships evolved things changed and just like change for the MC, it was good in the union of him and his ol’ lady.

“We’re going to Gemma’s. I’m not meetin’ the damn queen babe.” He laughed, the corner of his eyes catching the handsome young boy that mirrored him as a child. “Hey buddy…”

“Daddy, can I take my bear to gramma’s?” Abel had the raggedy old bear squeezed in his arms, the stuffed animal that Jax himself had as a kid. The poor toy was way past it’s prime but it was still his son’s favorite comfort toy just like some children need a blanket to pacify them.

“Of course ya can little man. You look very handsome, you all ready to go?” Jax reached out to ruffle his hair as he usually would only to get a look from Scarlet that said ‘Make me brush his hair again I’ll stab you’. He pulled his hand back and replaced it with one of his signature smiles.

“Mhmmm daddy. Scarlet, can I watch some cartoons?” Abel turned to his new mother figure and asked politely.

“Just until your father gets ready.” She offered the little boy one of her own pleasant smiles before he ran off down the hall with his bear.

“Sure, make it seem like I’m the slow one, babe.” He said in his deep, gravelly voice as he yanked one of the dark blue flannel shirts from the hanger and pulled a clean pair of jeans from the dresser drawer. Making sure the door was closed he dropped the towel and started to get dressed while his ol’ lady did the same.

[One hour later, Gemma’s house]

With a mad dash, Abel ran full force up the walkway lined with colorful flowers and forever green bushes, busting through the door before Jax and Scarlet’s feet had even left the inside of the car. It wasn’t very often Jax went anywhere that wasn’t on his Harley but in some cases an exception needed to be made. Reaching out his fingers linked with the beautiful, glowing brunette as he led her up the same path his son had just taken. The driveway was lined with bikes, a few vehicles scattered at the edges of the road Gemma lived on. They didn’t have many gatherings away from the clubhouse but as he and Scarlet neared the glass paned front door, it felt right and it felt needed. A small piece of normalcy for a change and he was going to welcome and embrace it.

“There’s my favorite grandson!” Abel leaped into Gemma’s arms just as Jax released Scarlet’s hand and held the door open for her to enter his mother’s house.

“I’m your only grandson, gramma.” Abel countered.

Stepping in behind his ol’ lady his eyes took a quick inventory of who was there; Bobby, Juice, Unser, Chibs...to the left stood Nero leaning against the dark oak cupboards. Already at the table sat Tig, ready and waiting for the meal to be served. Rat appeared with Brooke in tow, Jax guessed he had been out giving the azaleas cancer. Lyla, Piper, even Kenny and Ellie were in attendance. Jax’s thoughts drifted back to when they had done this when Opie and Donna were alive and it caused a sudden lump to lodge in his throat that he fought to swallow it down.

“Hey baby.” Gemma kissed Jax’s cheek as she held Abel in her arms, his bear not leaving his side. It was only when he discovered the other children that Abel wiggled his way free so he could run off to play before they were rounded up for dinner.

“Hey ma. Smells fuckin’ good in here.” With a slow inhale Jax took in the delicious scent of turkey baking in the oven that was consuming the entire inside of the house.

“You think I was cooking some kind of shit Jackson? Of course it smells good.” Gemma chuckled a soft laugh as she moved to Scarlet and cupped her warm cheeks in her aged hands and placed a kiss to her forehead. “Hey sweetheart. How you feeling today?” Before moving completely away, the matriarch made sure to use both hands to give Scarlet’s now very pregnant belly a generous rub. “And how’s our newest little biker or biker princess doing in there?”

Scarlet

“Using Mommy's insides like a playground. Doctor says the baby is as healthy as can be expected” Scarlet’s tone rang proudly walking into the house, her eyes scanning around the house nervously. She was used to seeing everyone around the clubhouse but all at once in a house made her skittish. Gemma smiled leading the way to the kitchen where everyone was gathered laughing and talking.

Jax was greeting everyone with Scarlet in tow, one hand placed lovingly on her stomach. One by one each person cheerfully brought Scarlet into a welcoming hug, hands touched and teased her extended belly. Each one relaxing her more and more. The air was filled with love. She paused for a moment to take in the surroundings of the house. This was something she never had, an experience she desperately wanted to be passed on to her unborn son or daughter.

Scarlet followed Gemma into the kitchen where a turkey was pulled out from the oven. She stood leaned against the frame of the hallway, watching all the ol’ ladies help in the kitchen. A sudden realization came over the young mother to be. She has never had a proper thanksgiving dinner. She wouldn’t know the head from the ass of a turkey let alone be able to cook one. Her eyes found Gemma who was finishing up a cranberry sauce.

“Come here sweetheart.” Gemma smiled warmly at Scarlet. Assuming there was a task for her to be done as her part of the ol’ lady duties but when she approached Gemma, an arm draped over her shoulder, a soft kiss was placed on the top of Scarlet’s head by the original old lady. “You’re home baby. Now go find a seat. We got this. There will be plenty of time for you to help out in this kitchen.”

Scarlet felt a pinch in her chest. She was slightly overwhelmed, appreciative but overwhelmed. Watching Gemma stir the sauce for a moment she did something she never thought she would do. She turned to Gemma and kissed her cheek. “Thanks Mom.” Gemma paused, shocked by the gesture but Scarlet walked away before she could react.

When Scarlet turned she caught Jax grinning, watching the moment between Scarlet and his mother unfold. He seemed relieved by it. Her eyes rolled at him walking up to him the both laughing as if there was some sort of inside joke between the two. His hands roamed down her sides looking down into her eyes, each of them consumed in their love.

Jax’s hand rubbed Scarlet’s very round belly, his other brushing the loose strands of hair from her face tucking them behind her ear. Suddenly his eyes widen and he took a shocked step back. Jax glanced down at her stomach then to her. “Our baby wants to say hello to you.”

Scarlet softly laughed at his realization that he was feeling his youngest child move. Both hands placed back on her stomach as he took in the special moment.

Jax

The rustling of chairs moving as people took a seat at the table and kids playfully laughing at the smaller table off to the side consumed the dining area of his mother’s house. But in that moment Jax was actually consumed by the realization that there was in fact a growing child inside of his ol’ lady. His eyes welled up with emotion but he fought it back. He never had these special moments with Wendy when she was carrying Abel; he hated her for getting pregnant, wanted nothing to do with the pregnancy and that was selfish on his part. He now regretted not having these moments with his oldest son and and as he looked to the little blond haired boy he felt an overwhelming sense of guilt for not being the father he needed to be before Abel even emerged into this realm we call life.

“Holy shit, you feel that?” His palm pressed firmly into the side of Scarlet’s rounded belly, asking the stupid question he already knew the answer to. But his excitement trumped his stupidity. Scarlet, along with some of the guys standing in close proximity, began to laugh.

“Fuck you guys.” The expectant father joined them in the laughter before prying his hand away from his ol’ lady’s belly to lead her to the table to eat.

The table was filled with food, turkey, all the trimmings, hell you’d think it was Christmas or some shit. The smell was enough to make your stomach growl and Jax’s did, just waiting to dig in. But before he could he knew his mother would have something to say just like she always did.

“Before we eat…” Gemma glanced to her left and smiled at Scarlet. “..I just want to say one thing. Scarlet, thank you for being part of our family, you have been since before you even knew us. Your ol’ man would be proud to see the woman you have become and embracing this way of life, sort of your own legacy. And thank you, from the bottom of my, sometimes dreary heart…” Everyone chuckled and tried not to laugh too hard, Gemma giving a look of daggers to the boys. “...As I was saying...thank you for making my son so happy. And of course...for giving me another grandchild!” Gemma clapped her hands together as if that was the best part of her entire speech and to her it probably was. “Now you can dig in!”

After finishing his meal Jax leaned back in his seat, his arm draped over the back of Scarlet’s chair, the other hand laid on his stomach almost mimicking where Scarlet’s was perched on her own, even if hers was due to the baby not from eating like a pig. “Damn ma, you outdid yourself. That was amazing.”

“We’re not finished yet, Jackson. Apple pie for dessert and…”She looked over at Abel as his eyes got big and round, hoping his grandmother was going to say something better than pie. “...chocolate cake!” Abel leaped from his seat in excitement. “I want cake gramma!”

“Wonderful, he’ll never sleep tonight, ma.” Jax chuckled, moving his hand to Scarlet’s belly for a quick rub, maybe secretly hoping to feel another kick.

“Well, why don’t you leave him here tonight? You and Scarlet could use some time together I’m sure.” The matriarch winked at her son as his mouth curled up in a smile. Scarlet had been taking on the motherly role for most of their new relationship and a break just the two of them would be refreshing.

“You sure, mom?”

“Jackson, do you really need to ask me that? Yes, I’m, sure. Now….let’s get dessert Abel.” She pushed away from her seat, Abel right behind her as he followed to the kitchen.

The boys began excusing themselves, needing their own dessert that didn’t require chocolate frosting or ice cream but a good ol’ dose of nicotine. Jax pushed away from his chair just as he felt a tug on his hand. His head turned and he looked down to Scarlet, her eyes flashing a sexy, seductive look that made him quickly realize a cigarette with the guys could wait. Taking her hand he helped her from her seat, her baby belly now making it a bit more difficult.

“I think we are going to call it a night then mom.” Jax leaned over and kissed the right side of his mother’s cheek. “Scarlet’s tired and I think I should take her home.”

“Alright baby.” Gemma returned Jax’s kiss before sidestepping to Scarlet. Her hands found their place on the pregnant belly as Scarlet received her own kiss to the cheek. “Thanks for coming sweetheart. Keep this little one safe and happy for us.” With a sincere smile Gemma stood back upright and once again looked at her son who had just given Abel his own hug and kiss goodnight. “Get them home safe Jackson, I’ll hold your ass responsible if anything happens to them.” Gemma’s tone went stern and Jax knew she meant every word she spoke.

“I will, mom. Goodnight.” He squeezed his hand around Scarlet’s as he lead them out of the house and to her car, ready to spend a relaxing night alone with his ol’ lady.