#awesome film series too

[th3-0bjectivist]

     Rest in peace, Tina Turner. You sure did have a commanding presence, a smokin’ voice and because of all you experienced and accomplished over many decades... you died a legend. Another trailblazing icon down, folks!

     The best way to enjoy a moment of silence for this celebrated woman is to mix that moment with one of her songs. So smash play and enjoy my all-time favorite track by Tina. What an expressive lady! She will be missed. Image credit: https://www.marca.com/en/lifestyle/celebrity-net-worth/2023/05/26/646fe721ca474162138b4605.html

[schoenpepper]

Teeth (5 Seconds of Summer)

Intro: It's nothing but a modern rendition of Romeo and Juliet to you. But Jade will twist the narrative into Bonnie and Clyde, if it means he'll get his hands on the one he loves.

Warnings: bad writing, awful grammar, not proofread it's too long for me to give a fuck, blood, gore-ish, death (minor charac), bad bad things, criminals, Jade and Floyd are warnings of their own, implied shmexy times, 100% inaccurate interpol description but it was that or the Red Room from marvels idk maybe the kingsman, the fish mafia are verrrrry bad people here ok, but reader doesnt care, betrayal

A/N: Did I fall in love with Jade halfway into writing this? Of course not. I fell in love with Jade a whileeeee ago. Anyway, this is the first installment of my Twisted Harmonies series, a bunch of songfics with different characters and plots and universes.

Masterlist

Some days you're the only thing I know

Only thing that's burning when the nights grow cold

Can't look away, can't look away

Beg you to stay, beg you to stay, yeah

Aren't you just a darling little thing?

Jade isn't Azul's right hand man for nothing; he sees through your facade all too easily. A little too naive for the sexy outfit you're wearing and a little too innocent for the foxy persona you've put up. The police force had sent lots of undercover agents before. Unfortunately for them, none had been as interesting as you.

He watches you stumble onto the seat next to him. You order a drink and meet his eyes, giving him a charming smile.

Ah.

He understands now.

You weren't sent as a mistake. You were sent because even your superiors saw an overflowing charisma that you yourself didn't seem to notice. They were likely betting on him being drawn to you (and you having better acting skills). They've underestimated him again.

Jade thinks he's too far gone to be a gentleman now, but he chuckles and offers to pay for your pina colada. You accept with a glint in your pretty eyes, and he congratulates himself for picking up a cute little plaything for the next few months. He hears out the alias you have and listens to your cover story with a close-lipped smile. When he leads the conversation to other places, he takes note of when you perk up and start shaking off the person you were forced to be in order to get closer to him. "You like that movie too? That's awesome! I thought I was the only person who knew what it was."

"It's definitely one of my favorite films, but it's not too popular, hm?"

"Right." You pout and huff so adorably, he might just take you where you're sat. He doesn't think you're supposed to like the things you're saying you like, but he enjoys seeing you mess up, if nothing else. "You know," Jade takes a sip of his martini, "I have a copy of it on DVD, if you'd like to come to my place and watch it. Maybe stay for the night...maybe have breakfast in the morning...?" He sees you light up and you seem to finally remember your mission, pushing down the bubbly and energetic rookie and projecting out an image of this mature and seductive force of nature.

It's just too funny.

He drives you to his small villa at the edge of town and he pops the CD into the DVD player. He wasn't lying when he said he liked the movie, and he enjoys hearing your commentary on it because it brings him new insights about the plot as well as you. After the movie, he takes you to his bedroom (like a gentleman 💙) and even cooks you breakfast in the morning. Muffins and scrambled eggs and turkey bacon. A part of his attention is on you as you eat breakfast blearily, but most of it is in the file he has on hand while drinking his morning coffee.

[Name: Y/N L/N]

[Status: Recent graduate of the X police academy, honor student]

[Threat level: Unknown]

Jade picks up his pen, looks on as you burn your tongue on your coffee, and jots down a note.

[Threat level: Unknown (near zero, requires further investigation)]

Sometimes you're a stranger in my bed

Don't know if you love me, or you want me dead

Push me away, push me away

Then beg me to stay, beg me to stay, yeah

The second time you meet up with your target is on a "date". You'd spent hours in front of the mirror just to look your most "seductive", yet Jade barely even bats an eye. He picks you up from the apartment you were assigned in his swanky, expensive, customized Rolls Royce and drives you both to this upscale 3 Michelin star restaurant in the middle of the city. You feel slightly uncomfortable because of all the haughty uppity-ness of the people in the other tables, but Jade's gloved hand is placed on the small of your back as he walks with you to the table he'd reserved. "Sorry, I'm not too used to places like these." You smile awkwardly at Jade.

And berate yourself internally because you're supposed to be mature and experienced and whatever.

"Nonsense dear, we're not here to keep up appearances." Thankfully, he's always a very nice person (if you ignore him being one of the leaders of possibly the biggest organized crime group in the world). He even pulls your chair out for you and everything. "I just wish for you to have an enjoyable time. Now tell me about the types of dishes you like, and perhaps any allergies?"

"Oh, I don't have any allergies. But I like chicken, and mushrooms!" You grin at him happily.

He pauses at your words, which makes you think that maybe you said something wrong, causing you to bow your head and stare at the French squiggles you just can't understand on the menu you're holding.

"I like mushrooms too."

The smile he gives you is all too blinding. You've always known he was rather pretty, but seeing him smile like this makes you aware of his insane face card. Him liking mushrooms wasn't on the file (even the international police force doesn't have much on the Leech brothers' files, much less Ashengrotto's), but you're glad you have something else to talk to him about. 

"I even grow them myself."

Your jaw drops and you have to stop yourself from barreling over the table and onto him as words just start pouring out of your mouth. "Seriously? That's so cool! Where do you grow them? Did you learn by yourself? Can you teach me? Do you think I can grow some too? Oh, wait!" You clear your throat and lean back on your chair. You're blowing your cover again, you just know it. "I mean, that sounds cool. Apologies for rambling."

Jade laughs and waves you off.

"No, I like that you're so passionate. You've been to my home before, perhaps you'd enjoy going back after dinner? I'll show you my terrariums."

"Awesome!"

You'll remember to keep up your disguise later.

Your waiter comes by with recommendations and wine, and your date is too sweet with how he constantly asks for your opinion. When you show any form of hesitance, he easily helps you out whether it be with ordering your entree or asking for another plate. Conversation flows too naturally with the teal-haired man and dinner leads to checking his terrariums, to staying up too late drinking sips of his stash of red wine while he helps you make a terrarium of your own, to passing out on his bed next to him.

When you wake up the next day, you realize you forgot to probe for information.

Oh well.

You can always see Jade next time.

Call me in the morning to apologize

Every little lie gives me butterflies

Something in the way you're looking through my eyes

Don't know if I'm gonna make it out alive

Everyday, you get more and more delectable.

"Whatcha' watchin', Jade?" Floyd leans over his shoulder to peer at the monitor in front of him. On the screen is you, oh lovely, beautiful, adorable you, in a skin tight suit made of a fabric that clings to your every curve so wonderfully. You do a turn to evade your opponent and land a kick on their abdomen. "Eh? Who's this spiky little pufferfish? New toy o' yours?"

"Not a toy." Even Jade is surprised by the words that leave his lips, but it curls into a sickeningly sweet smile as he continues. "They're cute, aren't they? Feisty."

You send the other person to the edge of the ring with a punch.

"What, so you'll keep 'em?"

When your opponent rushes back to you, you do a series of beautiful and swift movements to bring them down on their knees. Admittedly, the smallest part of him is rather jealous by the way you step on the person's chest to keep them down.

"Absolutely. They'll make a cute pet~"

"Hah, you're so weird." Floyd rolls his eyes and stands back up properly. "The Interpol'll notice your cameras soon, y'know they're not that stupid to keep their own training grounds unchecked."

"That's why I'm recording, of course."

"Freak."

"You wound me, truly."

For what he'd said about keeping you as a pet, he gets annoyingly ticked off at the sight of you helping up your comrade slash sparring partner. The way you laugh so unrestrainedly and smile so freely, in ways you refuse to do in front of him—your mission target—made him narrow his eyes and memorize the face of that friend of yours. Perhaps the frustration bubbling in his chest was only because his pet was rather uncooperative at the moment, still stubbornly holding onto the shredded pieces of your shoddy disguise. With that, he has no chance of seeing your many facets in the way you'd present them to a friend, to someone closer; because he dislikes that alias very much.

(He'll pull the Y/N L/N out of you sooner than later.)

"Whatever, just make sure to clean up or Azul's gonna be pissed."

"Of course."

He watches your figure leave the training ground and the camera's range.

Jade is a capable man who enjoys games.

And what game would be more fun than turning a police dog against its owners?

Fight so dirty but your love's so sweet

Talk so pretty but your heart got teeth

Late night devil, put your hands on me

And never, never, never ever let go

"And, open your eyes!"

You fidget with your hands nervously, trying to hide your anxiousness with a proud grin. You glance at the spread you'd poured your time and effort into; a typical red plaid blanket splayed out over the grass under the shade of a large tree, a wicker basket with its contents already laid out on the blanket. Finger sandwiches and little jars of pasta and lemon iced tea and tiny cake slices in glass tupperwares. You look back at Jade who you'd asked to dress more casually today for your (you can't really count anymore at this point) date, wondering if he dislikes your little surprise.

"Um, I know it seems sudden, but I made it all myself." You blush and kneel down on the blanket to grab the utensils. "Because, the button mushrooms you helped me grow, they grew really nice and big so I chopped them up and put them into a bolognese, so I thought maybe you'd like to try my cooking!" You feel so embarrassed because why is Jade still so quiet holy shit, though the shame fades when he tugs you into his arms.

"Jade...?"

"Apologies." He pulls away slightly to kiss your forehead. "I am very touched by the thought. I appreciate your effort, my dear, and I look forward to tasting your cooking."

You chuckle and kiss his cheek.

It had felt like a chore the first few weeks, but touching him, kissing him, loving him is starting to feel good. Natural. Right.

It's not. But it feels right.

"You better, I was up from four a.m., you know?" You let out a grumble when he hums so happily, swaying you in his arms. "So next date, you owe me your cooking too."

"Of course, my dear."

"With no poisonous mushrooms?"

"I don't recall agreeing to that condition."

It's so peaceful when he gives you his commentary on your dishes and gives you advice regarding the iced tea you'd made, and there's such a lovely calmness when you take a nap with him after eating, curled up into each other under the shade, your head on his chest and his legs around your own. Everything else fades away when he helps you pack up your jars and tupperwares into your wicker basket and drives you home.

He brings your hand up to his lips and kisses your knuckles with a close-eyed smile.

"Goodbye, my dear. Think of me always."

You close the door in his face so he doesn't see the blush on yours.

Fight so dirty but your love's so sweet

Talk so pretty but your heart got teeth

Late night devil, put your hands on me

And never, never, never ever let go

There's filth in the room, he can feel it with every pair of eyes that is shamelessly drinking in the sight of you. A polite curve to the lips, arm wrapped securely around you, he walks into the gala with the feeling of his favorite handgun digging into his thigh. He expects the night to go flawlessly; Azul would never throw an event that would end up in shambles, and your little organization is far too wary of this party being a trap to actually make a move. It doesn't change the bitter taste lingering in the back of his throat when these greasy middle-aged folks that Azul coined as "business partners" stared at you with their tongues lolling out like mutts sniffing a new treat.

Say, would his boss mind if he committed a little bit of homicide?

"Jade?"

Ah, but you look so sweet, looking up at him nervously. You must recognize the ugly faces, yes? Each and every one in the interconnected web of hell that Azul ruled over. "Don't worry darling, they're all friendly." Jade smiles, a genuine one, sweeping a glance over the crowd. "I'll make sure of it for you."

You seem comforted enough by his words, yet you still slink away into his side.

(Don't you know he's one of the most dangerous people here?)

"Azul, Floyd, this is my darling." He feels you freeze up when he introduces you to his brother and friend boss. His fingers run up and down your back in a soothing motion as he watches gears turn in the two's heads. "My love, this is Azul Ashengrotto. He's my superior of sorts. And this is Floyd, my twin brother."

The word 'love' has their eyes widen for just a split second.

Azul reaches out a hand to shake yours. "My, it's a pleasure to meet you. Jade has told us a lot about you." You smile nervously and shake his hand. Before his brother can full on tackle you and likely interrogate you about your relationship status, Jade gently pushes you off to the crowd with a nasty glare behind your back towards the piranhas circling.

"Do socialize for a bit, dear. I have a few things I need to talk about with them." He doesn't mention the bodyguards he'd gestured to keep an eye on you.

"So," Azul crosses his arms, "love, hm?"

Jade lets the polite smile fade from his face as he looks at them, one gloved hand on his chest. "Is there a problem, gentlemen?"

"You said pet!" Floyd huffs, shaking Jade by the arms. "No fair! What's with the secrets, Jaaaaade? You were supposed to tell me everything! When did you get a partner?"

"I wasn't lying, I just started seeing them differently." He consoles his brother with a chuckle.

"And how are you planning to keep it up?"

"Pardon?"

"Yeah, that person's a noobie undercover, right? Ya' can't hold on to some lousy loyal cop." Floyd rolls his eyes. "Don't be silly Jade, that loyalty's no good if it ain't yours."

"I'm sure he's already thought of that."

"But he doesn't seem prepared to let 'em go, though? A pet's fine, but if it's somethin' else, it'll be trouble."

Jade smiles again. "Not a pet anymore, no, but it's not that hard to train a lover either, is it?"

"What, you truly think that cop will fall for you enough that they'll throw away their principles and ideals for you?" Azul scoffs. "Without torture?"

"You think they won't?"

Azul and Floyd share a look then shrug in unison.

"I don't think there's a lot you can't do, to be honest."

"I don't care, long as you get those annoying do-gooders outta my face, capiche?"

Some days you're the best thing in my life

Sometimes when I look at you, I see my wife

Then you turn into somebody I don't know

And you push me away, push me away, yeah

It's boring.

God, it's so boring.

If you had known you would be subjecting yourself to petty small talk and the lecherous eyes of sleazy men twice, maybe three times your age, you would've clung on harder to Jade and forced yourself into whatever conversation he'd needed to have with Azul and Floyd. But then again, you don't think you have enough calm to face the Azul Ashengrotto without shaking in your boots (he's rich and evil and super duper powerful!). Floyd you can sort of handle, you do well with violence. Jade you slept with the night you met, so there wasn't all too much about him that still made you nervous. But Azul, that man's smart. You can't deal with wits like that—wits that gave him claws to dig his way out of whatever hellhole he was born in and right to the top of the food chain. He'll blow your cover all too easy.

You shift your champagne to the other hand and nod at your conversation partner.

No you don't get what he's bragging about, and you really don't care. This place is filled to the brim with the very wretches of society, faces you know from the red files you kept at headquarters. They parade around in human skins and even now, not a single person has said anything that even remotely implied ill-gotten wealth or human trafficking or whatever, so you know they're really good at keeping up face.

This one, he's getting a little too handsy.

"I can show you a good time."

You raise your hand to smash the champagne flute into his ugly face (Jade would definitely cover for you).

When did you get so confident?

Two big and bulky men in suits appear out of nowhere—they might be the asshole's bodyguards—but no, they restrain the other man and faster than you can blink, you're alone again with only the echoes of his shouting. You catch Jade's gaze on you from the corner of the room where he's still with Azul and Floyd.

His lips curl up in mischief and he winks.

Looks like your confidence wasn't misplaced, at least.

Call me in the morning to apologize

Every little lie gives me butterflies

Something in the way you're looking through my eyes

Don't know if I'm gonna make it out alive

"Jade, baby, I think we're lost."

"Nonsense, my pearl. I've been here a million times."

"You should've taken the left at the exit!"

"No, this is a shortcut."

"Jade!"

"Yes, my lovely backseat driver?"

He watches from the corner of his eye as you hold onto your seatbelt for dear life. "Where are we going?! It's not in the map. I swear if you actually get us lost—"

"What will you do?"

You pout at him. "Cry."

"Don't be so dramatic my love, I told you, I've been there before." Jade muses, one hand on the wheel and the other gently patting your thigh. He takes another turn and chuckles. "See? Look at the GPS, we're back on track."

When the Range Rover comes to a stop near a familiar campsite (he was not taking the Rolls Royce into the woods, thank you very much), you immediately hop out of your seat and start to fiddle with the items you'd brought with you. He gets out to help you carry the foldable tent and set it up not too far from the car. "Jade, did you buy new sleeping bags? These weren't the ones we used when we went to the lake." He watches on happily as you figure out there's only one, two-person sleeping bag.

"Wow. Are you cutting corners or are you just that clingy?"

"Whatever do you mean, love?" Jade turns to take out the coats he'd brought along, forcing you into one of them as you whined about its puffiness. Unfortunately, he'd rather not have a frozen lover to roast over the bonfire with the marshmallows. He intertwines your hand with his as you walk side by side on the trail, and he talks to you about safety procedures when hiking ("Do try not to separate, dear.") and protocols ("If you see a bear when I'm not around, say your last prayers." "What if you're around?" "I have a gun if it's really aggressive, don't worry about it." "Why do you have a gun, Jade?") and what kind of mushrooms would be safe to pick without gloves ("In general, if it's colorful, best leave it to me.").

He has such a great time hiking with his cute partner, even if you don't notice his camera taking snapshots every few minutes or so.

With a sack full of mushrooms and other flora, the both of you make your way back to the campsite. He starts on a fire while you set up the foldable chairs and prepare the ingredients for whatever would be dinner. He thinks it should be the mushrooms you had just gathered together, you think it should be something actually edible, and he relents if only because you compromise to add some non-poisonous mushrooms into a stew for dinner. The night ends with your intertwined bodies in the sleeping bag, Jade peppering kisses all over your face as you giggle and try to squirm out of your constraints (the sleeping bag and his arms).

"Goodnight, my love."

"Goodnight, Jade."

Fight so dirty but your love's so sweet

Talk so pretty but your heart got teeth

Late night devil, put your hands on me

And never, never, never ever let go

"I know how to shoot a gun."

—Were the words that spiked your competitiveness with your boyfriend. It wasn't your fault, really, but when that frustratingly pretty face got that smug look that just seemed like it was doubting your abilities, you felt the need to prove yourself. You weren't the brightest bulb in the, ugh, in the string of Christmas lights around the pine tree? But! You prided yourself on your ability to fight. Whether that be with a gun or a knife or just with your bare fists, you'd slammed foes several times bigger and stronger than you to the ground by virtue of pure skill. So to hear Jade questioning one of your rare mastered skills (he would probably argue otherwise) made your blood boil.

So. Shooting range.

You know he's experienced with guns, but you're pretty sure a sniper rifle is new even for him. You help him assemble it and get into proper position.

"My, how scandalous, my darling instructor. In broad daylight too?"

You grimace at his words.

"I'm just trying to get you into the right position!"

"Oh? And what position would be to your preference?"

"That's not what I meant and you know it."

"I feel like I've asked you the same question before too—"

"Jade, there are people—"

"—Did you say missionary or—"

"Oh my fucking gods."

"—Perhaps you said you preferred riding?"

You glare harshly at your boyfriend who was giving you the sweetest smile you'd ever seen on his cute face (no doubt to spite you), and you look around frantically in search of other people. Thankfully you're alone. But it doesn't stop you from repeatedly (softly) hitting his shoulder while he laughed at your expressions, sharp teeth showing. You poke a finger to the corner of his lips, which he quickly nibbles on. "What are you, a dog?" He pulls away just to lean back in and kiss your lips.

"Arf~"

Fight so dirty but your love's so sweet

Talk so pretty but your heart got teeth

Late night devil, put your hands on me

And never, never, never ever let go

Your phone rings in the dead of night. Jade groans and pats you awake to answer, and you console him with a kiss before looking at the contact.

It says 'That Guy'.

Jade murmurs out a question while you hurriedly leave the bed to put on a robe. "I just need to take this call, baby. I'll be right back." You answer the phone out of earshot, leaning against the railing of the balcony. A familiar voice travels through your phone and right to your heart. It stirs memories and realizations you're not quite ready to face again; the biting chill of the wind feels similar to the worry gnawing at you. "Agent L/N."

"...Reporting, sir."

It's still muscle memory, the response and the subconscious salute. 

(Is it still muscle memory to defend yourself against Jade, the way you were taught to?)

"How is your mission?"

You bite back the urge to say 'What mission?'. Ahhh Y/N L/N you're just so stupid, aren't you? First ever mission, your first big responsibility, your first big chance to be someone worth something. You look back at the bedroom and catch a glimpse of Jade's shadow on the bed. You were supposed to worm out information but gods, you've never even tried. It's like every single time he's with you your brain starts to melt into a hot pink sludge. "I'm working on it, sir." You lie because there's nothing else you can do. Where can you run when Jade finds out you were only using him? Where can you run when the Interpol thinks of you as a dead man because they believe you've betrayed them?

Where can you go when everything comes crashing down?

"It's only to be expected, such a man should be awfully guarded even against his own. Keep up the good work and remember to report back when you find anything."

Hah. Jade was barely ever guarded against you, if at all. You could've tapped his electronics at any time or tracked every car he owns. You just...never did. And the realization forces you to redraw your lines. You know exactly where your loyalty lies, don't you? You end the call and look at the lights in the distance; the city is never asleep. It's bursting with neon signs and traffic lights, but the noise doesn't reach the safe haven that's Jade's little villa. Start to make plans. Rethink it all over. You walk back into the bedroom and further, to the guest room you'd never once used but has way too much of your things in. In a suitcase pocket that's invisible to the naked eye, you pick up a packet of tiny buttons.

You hope Jade won't miss you too much in bed when you make a trip to the garage.

Blood on my shirt, rose in my hand

You're looking at me like you don't know who I am

Blood on my shirt, heart in my hand

Still beating

"Happy birthday, Jade!"

"Happy birthday, Floyd."

There's blood in the air, early morning in November. Jade looks up from his newspaper at his brother who was happily dragging a limp body into his pristine living room, sack over its head. "Oh dear, I hope you've called for cleanup. I have a date later today and I would rather not have Y/N turned off the moment I open the front door." He frowns slightly and puts the newspaper down. With careful steps, he approaches the unconscious person and yanks the sack off its face. "Is this your birthday present for me, brother?"

"Yep!"

"Well," Jade smirks, kicking the head awake. "I appreciate the effort."

"Make sure to pay me back, 'kay~?"

"Of course."

The young woman stirs awake, but his eardrums are saved by the duct tape that Floyd had slapped over her mouth. She looked around in a panic and struggled against the ropes binding her wrists and ankles together. "Hello there, Agent Assyra. You're my darling Y/N's favorite sparring partner, aren't you?" Jade whispers softly with a polite smile. A hand gently caresses her hair while she squirms. "I think you'll be good entertainment for me today. Oh, Floyd must have exerted quite a bit of effort bringing you to me, I ought to meet his expectations."

"Damn right." Floyd whines as he collapses on the sofa. "That bitch put up a fucking fight. 'M still sore from her kicking, she just had to do it in stilettos, didn't she?"

"I can imagine. Floyd, pass me the box under the cushion."

Floyd hands him a small box with his favorite set of scalpels inside it. 

"Let's see, it's quite unhygienic to do it in the living room, but I don't plan to let you live too long anyway. I suppose Y/N and I will just have to settle for a hotel room tonight." He hums a merry little tune as he made small incisions in her skin, the blade easily digging through the flesh. "You must have a tracker somewhere in your bloodstream, let's find it, shall we? Oh, I've always wanted to dissect an Interpol agent."

"Why didn't you dissect your Y/N?"

"That's not very funny, Floyd." Jade chuckles. He cuts a line down her arm and watches the blood flow down his rug. "I'll have to remember to buy a new rug. Perhaps Y/N can help me shopping~"

"Bah, you're sooo whipped it's gross."

He makes another line on her leg, gently prodding at the layer of skin and looking for the tracker. "I am a man domesticated."

"Happy birthday—um, Jade...?"

He freezes at the front door being suddenly shoved open with a happy-turned-concerned voice, slowly looking at the person by the door. It's you. In a cute sweater with a big box in your hands, hair sprinkled with snow and eyes wide in horrified shock. "Uh oh." He hears Floyd giggle, and the girl under him moves around more to grab your attention. You look at the girl, then at Jade, then at the cake in your hands. Then at the girl again. "Assyra...?" She nods helplessly. He thinks you might run forward to help your fellow agent (who was clearly on the verge of death from severe bloodloss), but the only thing you do is look at the scalpel in Jade's hand, and back to his eyes. You maintain eye contact while you slowly put down your box and leave as if nothing happened.

"Guess you're single again. Sad."

He ignores his brother's words, running to the box you'd left behind.

Inside is a big cake that he assumes is homemade, half chocolate and half strawberry and whipped cream. It looks decent, and he could feel your efforts in the two-colored icing writing out a message on the top.

'Happy Birthday, Jade! Love you lots :D'

Fight so dirty but your love's so sweet

Talk so pretty but your heart got teeth

Late night devil, put your hands on me

And never, never, never ever let go

Another pull of the trigger, another lifeless body falling to a heap on the ground. He looks on expressionlessly as Azul glances at him with a raised eyebrow before continuing to talk to the person whose lackey Jade had just killed.

"As you can see, Jade isn't feeling too patient today, so if you could just—"

He shoots another bullet, just barely grazing the man's ear before it enters the wall.

"Okay! I agree, I agree, forty percent, yes!" The man nods and signs the contract before scampering away with his (useless) guards. "While I do like a good deal, is there any explanation for your trigger happy behavior?" Azul looks at him in confusion. Floyd takes the offending firearm from his hand and pushes him to sit down on the armrest of Azul's big fancy chair.

"The little cop ghosted him, and he ain't too happy 'bout it." Floyd explains as he puts the gun on the table.

"They were supposed to run back." Jade finally speaks, brows furrowing. "The timing was off, it was an accident they weren't supposed to see. Their conditioning was incomplete and if their higher-ups catch a whiff of their feelings for me, they'll rewire my pearl back to being their little hound. They need to be back to me, and fast."

"Sorry, Jade, maybe I shoulda' brought that bitch in another time."

"It's not your fault." He sighs.

"Then? Why haven't you found them yet?"

Jade looks at Azul. "Have I become predictable? Because the men I've sent off, and the camera footage I've been keeping track of—all of them seem completely avoided. It's like they know my move two steps before I do it."

"Perhaps you've truly met your match."

"Or maybe your pearly's trapped at headquarters." Floyd smirks. "Let's go there! Like a field trip, except with guns and bombs."

"Absolutely not."

"Aww, Azul, you're no fun."

Jade leans back against the chair, looking at his phone lockscreen; a picture of the two of you cupping a mushroom with smiles on your faces. He hovers his thumb above your figure. He unlocks the screen to dial your number again. Like the previous one hundred and fifty two times, it only rings endlessly. Frustrated, Jade stands up, pockets his phone, and picks up his gun again. "Don't you have five more people to meet? Get them in." He snaps at Azul, and the man only pushes his glasses up and shrugs. He clicks a button and the door opens. In comes another greasy, balding, middle-aged loser with some eye candy on his arm, trying to look not so desperate.

Jade aims for his forehead.

"Oh dear, Jade's truly in a bad mood right now, Mr. Sanchez. Let's get this over with quickly before his finger slips." Azul drawls with a smirk, pushing the contract forward.

"Sign here, please."

Fight so dirty but your love's so sweet

Talk so pretty but your heart got teeth

Late night devil, put your hands on me

And never, never, never ever let go

"Whoop! On your left, Jaaaaade~"

He clicks his tongue and dodges accordingly, a flying metal bat hurtling through the air. The smoke and gasoline is choking, but the smell of blood could barely even make him flinch at this point. He turns to kick an incoming assailant in the gut, effortlessly catching a handgun thrown his way by his twin. "Jade! Grab the sparklies, okay?" Jade sighs and opens the sack, sweeping the mess of jewelry inside it and sealing it shut. Somehow, Floyd's idea of 'letting loose and forgetting cops that ghost you' was robbing a luxury jewelry store, just the two of them. Sibling bonding time, of sorts. While he normally wouldn't mind, he's been feeling all too ill without your presence.

"Oh pearl, when will you come back to me?"

He sighs listlessly. A shot is fired towards another guard before he goes to pick up a string of pearls and wear it around his neck. Everything just reminds him of you.

"Sirens, haha!"

At Floyd's signal, he lugs the sack over one shoulder and runs with his brother to the armored car they'd yanked from Azul. He hops into the driver's seat while throwing the 'sparklies' onto his brother's lap.

They don't get very far before a barricade of police cars force them to stop.

"That's no fun." Floyd pouts.

"Backup?"

"Nah, it's cool. Let's just spend a while in a jail cell, I wanna see Azul pop a vein, hehe~"

He could almost imagine Azul's reaction to them getting arrested. He shares a look with his twin and they hop out the car in unison, hands in the air and weapons thrown to the ground. His eyes widen when he realizes the person walking towards him with handcuffs was you.

"Jade Leech." You say sternly, tugging at his arms and cuffing his wrists. "You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you in the court of law."

Someone else takes Floyd in.

You push him to a police car and just before you can walk off, he helplessly whispers to you. Not a cry for help, not a plea, no.

A soft, hopeful, sickly sweet "My love." that makes you stop for one moment. Just one.

Before you continue walking.

He lost the gamble.

And above all else—

He'd lost you.

Teeth

Teeth

Teeth

Never, never, never ever let go

Floyd's in a separate cell.

He's flattered, honestly. His own cell is so heavily guarded, cameras and guards everywhere, it makes him feel very important. But it's quite boring, only a bed, a sink, and a shoddily covered toilet. He thinks the clothes look horrendous, and he's patiently awaiting his dear boss who would never leave him nor his brother rotting in a maximum security prison for the rest of their lives. But hours pass by and he's getting rather antsy. How long would it take Azul to bust him out?

The lights go out.

He sinks into his little cot and looks out the tiny window. It's barely even dark and they expect him to go to sleep, somehow.

Who sleeps at 7 in the—

Boom!

He sits up with a grin. Seems like it wasn't scheduled after all.

There's the sounds of fighting and gunshots and explosions and screaming. It all quietens eventually, leaving him on the edge of his seat for whichever side came out on top. There's footsteps in the hallway. Blue tinted silvery hair and glasses hiding an annoyed glare—it's Azul. Floyd comes barreling in a second later. "Jade. I didn't expect your depression to be so bad you'd let yourself get arrested." His friend boss unlocks the door and he steps out with a stretch.

"My apologies. I must admit I was rather preoccupied with my loss."

"Then congratulations."

They walk down the halls littered with dead bodies and Azul's men making sure the dead bodies stayed dead.

"Pardon?"

"It was quite difficult getting through the bulletproof gate, much less just finding this hellhole. Top secret, off the grid, heavily guarded and everything."

"Well then, I thank you for your efforts."

They step out of the prison and back to the grounds.

"Yes yes, but they weren't all my efforts you know?"

He sees a familiar silhouette.

"This place is Interpol property, after all."

"Jade!" You run towards him and tackle him into a hug. He can barely believe his eyes, but he hugs you back so tight you start gasping for air.

"Why...?"

You smile. "My name's Y/N L/N, I killed that alias! I graduated from X police academy, but just recently, I leaked confidential information from the international police force to one of the biggest crime groups in the world. It was fun!"

"Fun?"

"Yeah, but now I'm wanted and have nowhere else to stay." You tug on his sleeve. "Stranger, you got an extra bedspace? I just escaped from getting killed by my former mentors and I'm all tuckered out."

He carries you in his arms and kisses you hard.

[brainddeadd]

Wednesday

Quinn Hughes x fem!reader

watching a movie or show that they know they're interested in, not because they asked them to, but to be able to engage in more conversation related to it when they adorably ramble on and on.

I chose Wednesday as the show because I love it, but feel free to substitute it for whatever you like ☺️

Quinn Hughes had always stuck to what he knew—documentaries, sports shows, and maybe the occasional crime series. So when Wednesday hit the screens and you gushed over it, he gave you an apologetic smile, rubbing the back of his neck as he admitted, “I don’t think it’s my thing, babe.”

And it wasn’t. The Addams Family spin-off? Definitely not in his wheelhouse. But you were passionate about it, and Quinn loved nothing more than listening to you talk about the things that made you excited. The way your eyes lit up, how your hands moved animatedly when you explained the difference between this version of Wednesday and the older films, how you absolutely adored the dynamic between Wednesday and Enid.

He didn’t mind. In fact, he loved it. He’d sit beside you, nodding along, even though half of it flew over his head. You always apologized for rambling, but Quinn reassured you, “I like hearing you talk about it, even if I don’t know what’s going on.”

But something shifted after one particular night during an away stretch of games. He found himself alone in his hotel room, the silence almost oppressive. Without you beside him, the quiet felt too heavy, and his mind wandered to the way you had looked when you last talked about Wednesday —so full of life, eyes sparkling as you delved into all the reasons why you adored the show.

And that’s how Quinn Hughes, the guy who swore he’d never watch it, found himself pulling up Wednesday on Netflix. He knew it wasn’t his style, but it was yours, and that was reason enough.

The first episode had him raising his eyebrows, unsure of what to make of the deadpan humor and gothic atmosphere. But then he remembered your smile, the way you raved about Wednesday’s wit and Enid’s energy, and he kept watching. Soon, one episode turned into two, then three. By the time he finished the season, he found himself understanding exactly what you’d been going on about all this time.

When Quinn got back from his trip, you barely had time to ask how the games had gone before he casually brought it up. “So...I watched Wednesday.”

Your head whipped around so fast you nearly gave yourself whiplash. “Wait, what? You watched Wednesday?”

He gave you a half-smirk, a little shy as he admitted, “Yeah. I figured, you talk about it so much… I wanted to know what you were talking about.”

Your jaw dropped. “I thought you didn’t like it?”

“I didn’t think I would,” he shrugged, “but I wanted to see it through your eyes, I guess. And… I get it now. Enid is kind of awesome, huh?”

You couldn’t stop the huge grin from spreading across your face. “You watched it for me?”

“Yeah,” he said, his voice soft, “because I love the way you light up when you talk about the things you love. And I wanted to be part of that.”

Your heart swelled as you wrapped your arms around him, pulling him close. “You didn’t have to, but thank you.”

He kissed the top of your head, his voice tender. “You’re worth it.”

And just like that, Quinn Hughes—the documentary and sports guy—found himself deep in conversation with you about a show he never thought he’d care about, but now loved because of the joy it brought to your face.

[l0vema]

Svt x OGG: in the soop series

In which svt and OGG do a collab "in the soop" but it doesn't go as planned.

ogg- original girl group

You felt their gaze fall on you as you sat down to eat. You doubt they will ask- expecting them to not even notice you'd been wholed up inside all day as the rest of them played in the water and soaked in the sun. In the soop was meant for you to relax, and that's exactly what you did.

You were handed a plate of ramyeon by mingyu and quietly ate the delicious food. Despite resting the whole day you didn't manage to find something to eat- too lazy to even get up and pause your show. Once done with your plate you got up in the midst of conversation that surrounded you as both your members and seventeen were filled with the contentment of playing around all day. You headed over to the grill and watched as dk and mingyu flipped the meat. "Two more minutes please~~" dk whispered as he kept flipping. "Grab a plate though," mingyu chimed in.

Once you got done eating the grilled meat you were sated. Slumped on your chair sipping a coke is when you were directly asked a question. "Muna where were you all day?" Seungkwan asked. You looked up only to see almost everyone quieting down to hear you.

"Oh I stayed in bed. I was pretty tired right before this little holiday. How was the water sports though?" You replied simply, kind of shocked by the fact that the entire table went quiet (it was almost 20 people around).

"You totally should've joined. It was awesome ," Jiyoon added as she smiled at the memories of that afternoon. You mirrored her smile thinking tomorrow you'd join. "Maybe we can go for a night swin if I really did miss that much ," you requested to know one in particular. That led to a string of hums and nods before the conversation shifted to hoshi and Lisa already tripping form drunkeness.

Almost an entire 2 hours later you were finally done with the dishes. It was like the military you thought as you walked out of the dark kitchen only to see mingyu, dk, yoona, amare, vernon and seungkwan sitting around the verandah in swimsuits. "Muna! We were just thinking of going to help you finish so we can go," Amare lightly said. It hit me that they were actually going for a swim...

"Get changed and meet us here quick, dk wants to see the fish before they all fall asleep" you laughed slightly before turning to change into one of the many bikinis you brought with you.

At the lake you all moved into the water despite the coldness and got comfortable. It was an oddly nice feeling, the chill and the slomo feel from the water. You held hushed conversations with your members and svt as you swam around exerting your muscles that spent the day sleeping.

It was somewhat of an intimate thing- swimming in the dark with these people- you forgot completely of the cameras filming.

That was one of the reason you were so comfortable with seungkwan as he swam much closer to you whispering "are you happy?" In a tone you'd never heard from him- unsure. You smiled and touched his shoulder before nodding "it's hard to be sad when surrounded by such amazing people."

The rest of the night faded into the heavy look from the guys every now and then and the giggles when you and yoona were trying to drown one another- heightened when amare and sengkwan pushed both of us down together.

When you got out of the water it was unbelievably cold and painful to walk. You forgot where you out your shoes. The ouch and ah was heard as you clumsily looked around. "I can't find it anywhere" you said to no one in particular.

"Lemme carry you" was heard from behind you. Turning you were shocked to see dk looking down at you. A laugh found it's way out of you before shaking your head- you weren't a small girl, the internet never failed to remind you of the beauty standards you never reached. Dk was a big guy but still- you couldn't subject him to such. "No it's fine I'll just run as fast as I can and take big strides, if that doesn't work I'll wallow in my pain before the earth akes pity and idk turns me to dust" you said half joking before turning. "I can carry you though..." he said before grabbing your arm "C'mon my mother wouldn't approve of me leaving you here, the rest are almost at the house" that's when you realization the rest had completely gone. Well who were you to refuse at this point. You just prayed your rolls and squishiness didn't disgust him or get too heavy for him.

He casually draped you over his shoulder and got to walking. In the slightly awkward silence you blurted, "if you start shaking you can put me down- I don't want to punish you" before you chuckled, self degradation was funny at times.

"Muna, you're small and plus your soft- I'm used to the hard dumbells in the gym. This is definitely fine with me" he replied already setting me down. Looking up at him you noticed the flex of his arms and realised this man was in fact hella strong. "Thanks," you smiled while looking up at him and his large shoulders and thick biceps. Thank God you were half black or else you'd be red asf. Checking out the guy you're stuck in a house with for 2 weeks is crazy- especially on day one. You turned and got to walking to your room, the chill not forgotten as your nipples hardened. Little did you know that behind you Dk was watching you with his own hardened thing....it was not his fault you were soft and smelled good and small and just so pretty in the moonlight. He sighed, he was gonna have to get himself together before seeing you again. Two more weeks of this was gonna be impossible.

A/n: not proof read. Feel free to give requests on scenarios that could occur and girl group names. I'm open to SFW and NSFW. Also I'm a new fanfic writer so please go easy on me. Love, M.A

[spenceragnewfics]

THE MEET CUTE | Trevor Evarts x F!Reader

I'm so sorry if this sucks!

Summary: As a popular Youtuber and close friend of Chanse, you get invited to be on TNTL and meet an unlikely friend.

Word Count: 614

Being an influencer wasn’t something you ever thought you would be. Granted, you did grow up in the peak age of online content so it shouldn’t have been too surprising when you decided to try your hand at it during the pandemic. You were bored and thought it would help the time pass, it did plus you got five million followers in the span of three years as well.

During that time, you met a friend named Chanse. You two met at a mutual friend’s house and have been best buds since. His humor works perfectly with yours and you two are known for being super close. He used to be in a lot of your videos over Zoom or Facetime which got him some popularity too.

It’s because of Chanse that you are sitting on the Smosh Pit set right now, getting ready to film TNTL. You had watched the series for years so it feels like a dream to be filming it, especially with your best friend being right next to you. You had met some of the cast and crew before shooting but this was something else. 

Sitting on the stool, your fingers are typing away when someone walks onto the stage. “Oh, hey, you’re Y/N, right?” A male voice asks and you look up to see the most beautiful man you have ever seen. His light brown hair and facial hair make his youthful face more mature but his glasses help keep his youthful look.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah, I am. And you are?” You ask, getting off the chair. “I’m Trevor. It’s great to finally meet you, Chanse has said a lot about you.”` You look at him shocked, “I promise that most of it is probably not true.” He laughs while shaking his head. “It’s all been good, I promise. I’ve also seen a few of your videos. I’, excited to see if I can make you laugh today.”

“I’m excited to see you try.” You say, smiling before everyone gets called into place. Since you’re the special guest, you ae chosen to go first. It’s a smooth and funny filming and Trevor is the last one to go.

He comes out in a girly wig and holding a play camera as vlog camera. He lays on the floor and holds the camera in a familiar position before you spit out your water when he speaks, “Hey, hey, hey, all my panbaes.” It’s the intro you used to use back in the pandemic because you thought it was funny.

You soon understood how cringey it was and changed it but it had become a meme amongst your fans and now will get even more attention thanks to Trevor.

The rest of filming goes well before it’s called a day. Walking over to Trevor, you giggle “You did awesome, I genuinely did not expect that to come up.” He shrugs, trying to play it cool.

“Eh, I thought it would be funny. Do a bit of a throwback.” He says, his cheeks getting red. “So, have you seen more of videos than your letting on?” You ask, suddenly feeling more confident.

“Yeah, I used to watch all the time back when the pandemic was happening. I still keep up but not as much as I used to. I really like your stuff.” You smile and feel your cheeks heat up at his confession.

“Well, I would like to thank you and would also like to ask if you wanna get lunch sometime. Maybe we can discuss some of your past stuff, Mr. Streamer.” He chuckles and nods, “Yeah, yeah I'd like that a lot.”

“Okay, it’s a date then.”

[marshallpupfan]

Well...

I learned some PAW Patrol news today that, I must admit, has left me rather disappointed. Don't worry, this isn't a rant or anything. I just wanted to talk a bit about it.

If you were to ask me who my favorite PAW Patrol character is, my answer is obviously Marshall. As for my second-favorite? It's not one of the other main pups or any of the part timers. That's not to say none of them are on my favorites list though, as Chase, Rocky and Everest are in my top ten, just to name a few.

No, my second-favorite PAW Patrol character is... Claw!

Seriously, I just love this doberman. In fact, I became a fan before even getting to see him in action in the cartoon. The moment he first popped up in a leaked Rescue Knights image, I quickly fell in love with his design, especially his awesome-looking armor. That, and he was flying around on a huge dragon, which... come on, that's cool. And when I finally got my chance to watch him in an episode? In my opinion, he did not disappoint. For me, he's not only one of the most memorable aspects of Rescue Knights, but of season 8, period.

Naturally, once the subseries came to an end, I kept hoping that, someday, we'd return to it and see him again. Or, if anything, he'd pull a Sid and Arrby and appear in some regular episodes. Sadly, two and a half seasons have gone by since then, and both he and Rescue Knights have been a no show. Despite that, I held on to the hope that he'd eventually pop up in the cartoon again.

Regrettably, I might have to let go of that hope.

(Source)

Some of you might doubt this information, but Tybsy has provided many accurate leaks and insider info in the past, and he continues to do so. I've learned to trust his words.

It seems that, for some reason, the writers have been told to avoid pitching ideas for episodes based around Rescue Knights. Worse yet, they were told to do the same with Dino Rescue. Not only does this mean there's a slim chance of seeing Claw again, but possibly even Rex, too... another pup who I'd love to see more in the cartoon.

Now, there's a possible reason for them to do this with Rex and Dino Rescue. Given that a few sites have already started listing the third film with the name "The Dino Movie", it's possible it will indeed be quite similar, at least in some way, to Dino Rescue. It may even involve Rex! Currently, we still don't know for sure, but there have been some hints here and there that suggest he might be involved.

EDIT - I forgot there was another leak some time ago involving some file that relates to the third movie, and the metadata specifically mentioned Rex. There's a very, very good chance he'll be in the movie!

And although Tyby jokes, it is possible, however unlikely, that they do want to avoid creating continuity errors with what we've already seen with Dino Rescue. Just look at the errors we got with The Mighty Movie and the season 10 Mighty Pups episodes, most of which still confuse viewers to this day. If I were running things, I'd absolutely tell the team to make sure that DOES NOT happen again...

Rescue Knights, on the other hand? I see no logical reason to avoid it. I have my doubts that Claw or his dragon will appear in a theatrical film, especially before certain other characters (not impossible, but I wouldn't bet money on it), and I'm going to assume we'll never see him in Rubble & Crew or the two Youtube spinoffs, so... what gives? To make matters worse, now that the main TV series has switched to a new style, they'll have to modify or remake Claw's model to match the new designs, and I can't see that being a high priority. Again, not impossible... but it certainly doesn't help his odds.

My hope of seeing Claw again isn't 100% dead or anything, but I can't help but feel pessimistic about his chances. To think, all this time, it never happened because Rescue Knights has been restricted from appearing in future episodes. That's so disappointing, you know? I can only hope that they do indeed have something special planned someday for Claw, or they'll finally lift that restriction on his subseries... but truth be told, I'm not going to get my hopes up.

Well, here's to you, Claw. Even if we don't see you again, you'll always remain my favorite (ex) knight of Barkingburg! Still, here's hoping that we do get to see you again... someday.

[david-talks-sw]

When 'Star Wars' dilutes the impact of a "Kurosawa samurai standoff"...

It's no secret that one of the major inspirations for Star Wars was Akira Kurosawa movies. The Hidden Fortress influenced the basic structure of the first film, was a basis for Lucas' character archetypes and his use of narrative POVs.

But, really, all of Kurosawa's films were an influence on the making of Star Wars. Including the duels seen in his and other samurai films from the 60s.

Dunno if you've seen a kendo fight, but they're pretty similar.

The duelists size each other up, and there's a lot of mind games going on before the strike actually happens.

If you hold your sword this way, the other guy adjusts his stance.

You move your foot that way, the adversary responds accordingly.

Cinematically, this process allows you to play with a whole treasure trove of elements to build up the drama and suspense. We see this slow-yet-tense approach to dueling reflected all over the Original Trilogy. And we've seen it again in recent Disney-released content.

The perfect and first real example of this in Star Wars is the fight between Ben Kenobi and Maul, in Rebels.

The tension increases more...

... and more until the two fighters move, the music swells...

... and then it reaches its climax.

Beautifully executed.

Dave Filoni's done his homework, it shows, and while it's an awesome homage, narratively it also holds weight. There's a reason why this fight is so quick:

This time, Obi-Wan isn't fighting to avenge the death of his master, he's not fighting to save his own life... he's fighting to protect Luke's. And that means there's no time to fuck about. He'll end the conflict swiftly and decisively, he won't let it come to a prolonged acrobatic fight. So he lures Maul in by making him think he's taking Qui-Gon's form, and strikes true when Maul, increasingly consumed by his own rage to the point of blindness, falls for it.

Again: a wonderful fight and an excellent homage.

Then we get to Luke's stand-off with Kylo on Crait, in The Last Jedi.

An interesting take on the trope, also with meaningful narrative impact. As Rian Johnson writes in the TLJ screenplay:

"This is not like a saber fight. This like an old-fashioned samurai duel."

Here too, the tension gets built up...

... and every time we're close to getting that climax, Luke dodges.

It leaves a feeling of dissatisfaction, which is exactly what Kylo is feeling as he boils with rage.

Suddenly, we do get the climax...

... and a twist. Luke was never actually there. Boom. Those inserts during the build-up phase? If you look at them again they're clues (Luke doesn't leave a mark on the ground, salt doesn't land on his clothes, etc). Luke wasn't engaging because he wasn't actually there, he was buying time for the Resistance to escape.

Okay. Cool.

Next time we see a "Kurosawa" duel... it's here, in The Mandalorian.

Again, a lot of posing, slow movements and patience, as is expected from the trope.

But we know nothing about the opponent Ahsoka is fighting other than her name is Morgan... so no emotional impact, there.

At some point, Ahsoka loses a lightsaber. The apprentice to the Chosen One is struggling against some rando.

We find out later on that Morgan is a Nightsister from Dathomir, and that's cool... but we already know how Jedi-trained folks fare against the Dathomiri.

If you ask me, it feels like manufactured stakes. But that's beside the point. In fact, y'know what? It's fine.

Though the impact of this duel isn't as great as its predecessors, the whole episode is filled with visual homages to Kurosawa's work.

It makes sense that the duel would be too. Also it's the first time we're seeing Ahsoka in live action, in a lightsaber duel, the hype is real. Let's cut 'em some slack.

So we come to the series Ahsoka... where almost every duel in the the show has the Kurosawa posturing and tip-toeing and... I dunno. I was bored?

Like, the primary purpose of this approach to duels is that it's meant to be suspenseful and intense... and now it's not.

Because we know Ahsoka is gonna beat the crap outta these droids...

... so why even bother faking some semblance of "what's her next move gonna be?" suspense? There's a hole right behind her, gee, I truly wonder.

Oh, you think putting her against an Inquisitor's gonna make us fear for her life, wonder if she's gonna get outta this situation unscathed?

She was wiping the floor with two of them at the same time, a decade prior. At 17, she was killing Inquisitors while disarmed.

Do you really expect your audience to fear for her life in a fight against Marrok?

So we get to the fight with Baylan, and the posturing and studying opponent's next move would be welcome here (two Order 66 survivors, knew Anakin, both well-trained former Jedi)...

... if we hadn't literally seen that same dynamic with Marrok who, again, we knew was gonna die.

No tension was built in either moment, the only thing it achieved was me pressing >> on my keyboard.

It's not captivating anymore, it's just slow and un-dynamic.

Bottom line:

Tributes to Kurosawa are nice. They're part of what makes Star Wars what it is. But c'mon, we get it already.

Lightsaber duelists don't need to tiptoe around each other and change poses at every fight. Because when the actually meaningful duels come up (like the one with Baylan), the impact will be lessened.

The "Kurosawa samurai duel" is artistic and interesting, but it should be used sparingly in order to maintain its charm and not get old and trope-y. AKA too much of a good thing becomes a bad thing.

[devildomwriter]

“…Excuse me? You don’t know TSL? And you call yourself a human?! Just how clueless ARE you?! How could you not know?! Just the fact that you don’t know TSL alone is proof that you’ve been wasting your life! So, I’m going to do you a favor and teach you about TSL. Make sure you pay attention! The Tale of the Seven Lords, otherwise known as TSL, is a series of fantasy novels written by Christopher Peugeot. It’s a heroic epic spanning 138 volumes, and it’s the most widely-read fantasy series in the world. There are even theatrical versions, an animated series, and feature films, too. And it’s been translated into a total of 182 different languages. The 1990s theatrical version was an utter disaster, owing to the fact that they added several characters that were NOT present in the original manuscript. At the time I was like, “this producer totally needs to crawl into a hole and die!” But then the 2015 version came out, and it was AMAZING! Better than amazing! If you ask me, it showed that needlessly cramming a female lead in there alongside Henry was a bad idea. That’s not what he needs. What he NEEDS is a friend who really understands him, and the 2015 version proved that.

Also, the most vital element of the story is that each of the Seven lords is so unique. They’re all so interesting in their own peculiar way. That’s what makes TSL so great! The lords are all brothers…the oldest is called the Lord of Corruption. He doesn’t come across as being so bad at first, but he’s always plotting and planning in secret. The second oldest is the Lord of Fools, a scumbag who’ll do anything for money. The third oldest is called the Lord of Shadow, a brooding recluse. The fourth oldest is known as the Lord of Masks. He masquerades as a high-status, upstanding member of society, but underneath it all, he’s an inhumane monster. The fifth oldest, the Lord of Lechery, only ever thinks of sex. The sixth oldest is the Lord of Flies, and he only ever thinks of food. The seventh oldest, called the lord of Emptiness. He’s weird…you never know what’s running through his head! It seems most people like the oldest lord, the lord of corruption, the best. Everyone always talks about how great he is. But not me. I like the third Lord way more. Of course, I like Henry too. He’s the protagonist. He’s almost as great as the third lord. The second Lord is total scum, a hopeless degenerate that leads a life of extravagance and indulgence. He’s always causing trouble for the third lord. He’s got these magical pigs that can give birth to solid gold piglets, and he treasures them above all else. So Henry goes and talks to the pigs, and using his wit and powers of persuasion, he convinces them to leave with him. Then, he leads every last one of them away, and presents them to the third lord as a gift! Wow…I mean, they’re SUCH GOOD FRIENDS you can almost feel it! It’s enough to make you cry! Oh, and then there’s that one really awesome moment when the two of them realize they both like and respect each other, and they high-five! I just LOVE that part, you know? I wish I could have a moment like that. …I wish I could be like the third lord. I may be a recluse like him, but we’re totally different, because he’s got an amazing friend like Henry. Check it out. See that goldfish in the fish tank there? He’s actually named Henry. I love TSL so much that I couldn’t help naming him after the main character. But I cant really high-five a goldfish, can I?

The original author of TSL, Christopher Peugeot, he’s actually a human, you know? That’s why I’m so jealous of you guys. Humans are so lucky, you’ve got subscription services that let you watch your favorite anime anytime, you can go to Akihabara whenever you want… Why do only you guys get to experience all the good stuff? I mean, humans’ whole concept of pleasure originally came from us demons, you know? We gave it to you. So, why can’t we have a little bit of it back now, huh? I mean, I want to be able to go to a Japanese maid café, too. I want to hear the maids welcome me as if I’m the master of the house, and have them draw ketchup hearts on my fried rice omelette, to experience the magic of it all. I want to cosplay as Henry, and then go stand in the center of Akihabara, or maybe that one building in Tokyo that’s shaped like upside-down triangles. And once I’m there, I want to perform Henry’s super-powerful signature finishing move for all to see and say the incantation that goes with it. I want to shout it at the top of my lungs!...Actually you know what? I want to BE Henry.”

— Leviathan’s longest TSL rant (Chapter 1-13)

[the-kestrels-feather]

I know I'm SO late to the party, but In light of the hbomberguy video, I wanted to drop a list of some of my favorite video essayists on here who are all great. Some are well known, some of them not, but all deserve a lot of love thrown their way!

Any creators I know are Queer will have a * next to their names if that's what you're looking for! (Note some of them might not have a star that should, that's not me trying to invalidate anybody I just didn't know, please feel free to correct me!)

Dominic Noble- book content! Has a series called Lost in Adaptation that judges how faithful movie adaptations of books were to their original source material, but also does some reviews/summaries as well. Very publicly denounced JKR after she was revealed to be a TERF and stated he will no longer review anything by her on his channel. Also deleted ALL of his HP videos after finding out she was a TERF (which were his most popular videos), so I have a really deep respect for him tbh. Former Channel Awesome member who publicly denounced them on several occasions, and an all around swell guy.

*Overly Sarcastic Productions- channel run by 2 people who go by Red and Blue. History and Mythology/Literature content, as well as analysis of tropes and media! I've been told their History content can be a bit... Iffy, but I'm not a Historian so I don't know, however if they get something wrong they're good about correcting it for what that counts for. Very interesting to listen to, I've watched Red's Videos roughly 100 times each. Also has a podcast.

*Strange Aeons- fandom/Tumblr history mostly, as well as some history, and weird businesses too. Reads a LOT of cursed content for her channel.

*Lindsay Ellis- Media/film analysis. obviously not as unknown as some of the others on here, but I absolutely adore her content and will forever be sad that she isn't on YouTube anymore.

Cruel World Happy Mind- MLM/explanation of controversial figures. I'm not sure how best to explain her content, but she seems genuinely lovely and is interesting to listen to. Also a victim of Illuminaughtii's ire and deserves some love. The video she made on Blair is a bit outdated since she made it at the start of when this all came to light, but imo it's definitely worth a watch. Her talking about her interaction with Blair genuinely broke my heart.

*Night Mind- Analog horror/Unfiction/ARG content! Analyzes and explains various internet horror pieces, and also has a very nice voice to listen to.

*Lola Sebastian- Film/Media Analysis!

Li Speaks- Deep dives into various nostalgia, mainly flash games!

*Princess Weekes- Media/film/literary analysis!

abitfrank- summaries and analysis of various "darker" children's content such as Coraline (book and movie), Nightmare Before Christmas, and various dark fairy tales

Hello Future Me- writing advice and world building information!

Curious Archive- deep dives into the various bestiaries of video games and the animals in real life that they're similar to, I love his Subnautica video!

In Praise of Shadows- Horror media analysis! Will often focus on specific franchises, but also covers things like horror comics and tropes as well.

Wait in the Wings- theatre! Deep dives into the back stories behind the production of various musicals! His video on Rogers the Musical that he did for April Fool's last year is comedy fucking gold

Weird Reads With Emily Louise- conspiracy theory/cult/weird thing analysis! Looks at things from an objective and skeptical view, and is very in depth. Recently served as a consulting producer on an HBO Max documentary on the Love has Won cult.

Ask a Mortician- death content! Covers various historical events and darker stories of death from the view of a Mortician.

*Izzzyzz- deep dives into fandoms, as well as well as different video games and kids' virtual worlds.

Disney Dan- Disney content! Covers the history of different mascot costumes at Disney and Disney-like parks! Has collaborated with Definctland in the past too!

Yesterworld- theme park content! Discusses history behind rides and parks, as well as some Disney movies. I think has also collaborated with Defunctland and Disney Dan?

Legal Eagle- legal content! Breaks down news about ongoing legal cases in a way that feels approachable. I like him because both my parents are paralegals and his videos have helped me understand what they mean when they're talking about work a little bit

Super Eye patch Wolf- media video essays! Mostly about anime/manga and video games, but also covers things like influencer scams and pro wrestling. His "what the internet did to Garfield" video is SO GOOD

*Jessie Gender- Media Analysis, loves Star Trek

*Laura Crone- Media Analysis video essays, her videos on the Swan Princess are fucking great I highly recommend!

*Lady Emily- Media Analysis, did a whole video on Spuder-Man turn off the dark that is SO good. Co writer for Sarah Z

Tale Foundry- covers different forms of fiction, their xenofiction video is great, as is their Angelarium one!

Defunctland- Theme Park ride and Children's TV History channel!

Jenny Nicholson- one of the sort of "big three" commentary channels with Lindsay Ellis and Sarah Z imo, covers all sorts of stuff but her most recent one is a 3 hour video on the theme park Evermore Park!

*Sarah Z- Fandom history and Media analysis! I really enjoy their content, the Johnlock Conspiracy and DashCon videos are my favorites!

Li Speaks- Flash games/virtual world analysis mostly! She has a very soothing voice to listen to, if you played like. Any MMOs or virtual worlds growing up I Highly recommend. I've watched her video on Horseland SO many times.

*Codex Entry- Video game coverage! Her videos on Pathologic are great if you're like me and wanted more after the Hbomberguy video!

Wendigoon- ARG/Spooky content! One of the early proponents of the Mandela Catalog and best known for his conspiracy theory iceberg, but has also covered things like various weird/unsolved crimes, Assassination conspiracies, and other things. His videos on Faith, Blood Meridian, The Mandela Catalog, and his Religion/Cult iceberg are some of my favorites

Dino Diego- Dinosaur fiction, like movies, video games, books, short stories, etc. his 2 videos on West of Eden and Winter in Eden are two of my favorites!

Haley Whipjack- I don't know how to describe her content really? She does a lot of deep dives (her Shrek one is my favorite), currently doing a recap of Once Upon a Time by season that is very fun. She's an elementary school teacher by day (that's not me dozing her she talks about it on her channel), and so she has fun unhinged teacher energy!

Other channels that are a sort of collection of different people talking about different things rather than 1 or 2:

TEDx

PBS

The Exploring Series

[pseudophan]

nora, I just watched the first part of becoming youtube and I have so many questions.

who tf is ben? like, was he genuinely just some guy who happened to be friends with some youtubers and randomly decided to make a highly produced docu series on youtube? how did he get all of these youtubers to agree to be in this? why is there a trailer for a 2nd part but it looks like that was never posted? why put all this work into that channel and then just...vanish after like a year?

he's a journalist! more specifically he writes for doctor who magazine and has done a bunch of other doctor who related things because of that, and i'm assuming that's at least partly how he got into the youtube scene seeing as half of british youtube back in the day were major doctor who nerds

as for why becoming youtube 2 was never released, idk if he's ever given an official reason but i do know it cost way more to produce than he ever earned from it, so that's probably one of them. like there's a trailer because he did film a bunch of it but it never got finished. tbh though i would assume the main reasons are 1. several people in the first part got exposed for being horrible people and 2. youtube suddenly got very very big very very quickly. it's a bit difficult to do a documentary series when half your cast is evil and the other half is famous and booked and busy. because it got delayed for so long he also had some other issues like youtubers (*cough* dan *cough*) suddenly being like 'actually i don't agree with anything i said anymore please don't release that', which i'm sure didn't exactly do wonders for his motivation to get it finished

i would say all of those things contributed to part 2 getting delayed and then eventually youtube had just changed way too much and the series, or at least the approach to it, was getting outdated. i very much recommend finishing the episodes that do exist though! it's a great series, even if it's aged somewhat questionably in parts, particularly in regards to some of the youtubers in it. but then again what youtube content by more than five people hasn't...

i recommend watching it all in order but my personal favourite part of the whole thing is the song in episode 10, it's so stupidly well done and has very much been stuck in my head for the past eleven years

important notes: dan and phil are not in the song but tomska does yell AMAZINGPHIL at one point and it's awesome. also the song continues after the bit where ben and jack howard make out

[themollyjay]

Watch ARK: The Animated Series!!!!

So, I binged ARK: The Animated series today. It's a TV show, which is based on a video game and not only is it great but, I swear to God, whoever wrote this set out with the intention of pissing off the Gamerbro crowd as much as humanly possible.

Stuff that will make the Gamerbros cry and whine like little babies: 01). Main Character is a Aboriginal Australian Lesbian (Voiced by an Aboriginal Australian Actress no less). 02). Main Character's wife is a blue haired women who works as a translator for a humanitarian air organization (voiced by Elliot Page). 03). Main Character is a neurodivergent paleontologist. 04). Main Character's mother was a civil rights activist. 05). There's a plot line revolving around protesting the taking of Aboriginal lands. 06). Another major character is a Chinese Warrior Woman who is also a great big lesbian (voiced my Michelle Yeoh). 07). Main villain is a Roman General (Voiced by Gerard Butler) 08). Secondary Villain is an 19th century British Scientist (Voiced by David Tenant) 09). Tertiary Villain is a female Roman Gladiator. 10). Another major character is a Lakota man from the 19th century who was abducted from his tribe and sent to one of the Indian boarding schools. 11). The Main Character is better at science than the 19th Century British Scientist guy.

Great things about the show: 01). It's very gay. Like, so gay. 02). The characters are freaking awesome. 03). There are freaking dinosaurs. So many dinosaurs. 04). It makes you feel. Just, seriously, it makes you fucking feel.

Cons: 01). Content Warning: Self Unaliving in episode 1 02). This show is fucking violent. Like, I get that there's this whole 'battle for survival' thing going on, but we're talking kind of gratuitous 03). levels of violence. Seriously, half the animation budget was spent on red paint. That much violence. 04). The show is predictable AF. Like, I don't mind that, but don't expect any real surprises or plot twists.

In conclusion: Watch the fuck out of this show, because cons aside, it was freaking amazing. It's not like, Arcane levels of perfection, but if you want a fun, gay, show to watch, this is a great choice. There is also a part too already filmed and in the can which will drop later this year, so we're definitely getting more, and even the preview for Part II has gay in it.

[urf1lterr]

lovesick | pedro pascal [2]

"and on this night and in this light i think im falling, im falling for you."

next chapter: [3] previous chapter: [1] series masterlist

summary: in which a 1975-obsessed film student accidentally falls in love with an older man she can't have.

pairing: actor!pedro x intern!reader

genre: acting world!au, big age-gap!, strangers to friends- maybe lovers?? au | angst, mature, awkward, love- eventually

word count: 6.7k

status: in progress

author's note: this chapter was for fun- i have the 1975 on repeat so i had to lmao. i kinda wanna do a slow burn because i don't want to make anything happen so fast. and pedro was at the oscars a few hours ago so why not post another chapter for him :) not edited.

You hated working weekends.

Something about waking up extremely early on a day that was supposed to be your day off irks you. Why have a scheduled rest day if you're just going to be scheduled to come in? It made zero sense, especially since you were only given a two hour notice before while sleeping.

No pay, clothes, gifts could ever make you happy after being called in at 5am for a 7am shift-

"Venti iced white chocolate mocha with oat milk, vanilla sweet cold foam, caramel drizzle, and light ice as always," Pedro listed as he handed you the coffee.

"Oh my god, I think I love you," you blurted out, staring at the cup in awe.

"That was fast, I see now why you're single," Pedro replied, giving you the side eye. "And soon diabetic."

Rolling your eyes, you take a sip of the coffee before shaking your head. "Not like that, you moron," you scoffed as he glared at you. "I love coffee too much- and who says I'm single."

"Think of it as your reward for waking up to the call," he joked as you just stared at him annoyed. The one time you turn off your do not disturb and this happens. "Your loneliness says otherwise."

"I am not lonely!" you gasp as he shrugs. "I'll have you know I am dating-"

"If you dare say Matty Healy I will personally push you in a bush-," Pedro declares, stopping you as you try to interject. "-and won't help you back up."

Huffing, you cross your arms as he laughs at the sight of your defeat. He knows you too well considering the fact you only met two months ago.

In fact, these two months were probably the best ones you have had all year. Not only did you experience some awesome moments you're sure you'll never get to witness again, but you got along with a lot of special people.

What made things even better was the fact that you got along with your boss because who knows where you would've ended up if Finn was a total douche- which he wasn't. But he did have his moments where he took your kindness for weakness- like asking you to come in for shift on a Saturday.

One thing that definitely advanced would have to be your relationship with Pedro. Nearly best friends is what you two were typically called on a normal day on set by how close you've become.

The nearly part added because nothing could ever come between his relationship with Bella, or Bellie in his own words. And because Jules always made sure to tell the jokesters that she was not giving up her position just yet.

But when it came to work, Pedro was always there for you. Considering he's been in the industry since before you were even born, which he yelled at you once when you joked, he was the best support.

He would even ask you what you were assigned to do and tell you specifically what was wanted without you even asking- even finding ways to physically assist before being caught and sent back to his actual job.

There were also the constant times where he would spam you with iMessage game requests to 8 ball and ignore you after beating him three times in a row, claiming his phone died despite your messages being sent through.

The only thing that made today better was that he was here because who knows how boring the day would have been if you were spent hanging with the technicians who; in fact, did not appreciate the countless times you dropped a mic.

"Why didn't Jules get called in?" you questioned as he turned up the computer brightness you were using. "That girl never wakes up early but I kid you not, she was playing minecraft on her computer when I was leaving."

"I love minecraft," Pedro sighed.

"I do too, but Jules always sends the creepers to my house," you complain. "They always destroy my garden."

"I could only imagine the devastation in your eyes," he dramatically exhales as you nudge him. "But I think it's because you're more...attentive? Not saying that she isn't, but she sure loves to talk about Jersey Shore in between takes."

"She's been binge-watching all the seasons after work."

The conversation ended once he was caught again by one of the producers and lured out of the office you were in. Initially, he searched around the studio and found you to gift the coffee, but he stayed because he did not want to sit on the makeup chair for another round of a drastic look being applied to his face- especially if you weren't there to pester him.

As for you, once clocked in Finn managed to have you scan after emails as a way to apologize for the call in. Apparently, one of his assistants called out so he decided to use you as their replacement since he couldn't find the time to sit down in a cozy office and do so.

But you were totally not complaining.

That only lasted you about two hours before you were finished and terribly bored.

Throwing the empty cup of coffee in the trash, you decided to walk around in hopes of finding something better to do or else you would've fallen asleep on the desk.

You would've if you weren't scared of the thought of a director finding and; consequently, firing you.

Hearing a loud noise, you quickly averted your eyes where your ears were signaling where the noise came from. Lightly jogging behind a curtain, your eyes widened to a sight of a desk on its side and a man hovering over it.

"Joon?!" you exclaim, running over to find him lowly panting, trying to remain his coolness as you began inspecting him to find any injuries.

"I'm fine," he calmly replied, using his dimpled smile as a way to reassure this but you didn't believe him. That was a loud drop.

"Why in the world are you lifting a desk that surely isn't less than 30 pounds?" you glare as he chuckles at the fake anger you poorly tried displaying.

"One of the technicians asked me to bring it out."

"And did you forget that your back would disagree?"

He shuts his mouth for a second, loss for words at your comeback. "I couldn't say no," he shyly replied. "I didn't want to have to pull out my medical forms explaining why I can't lift a table."

Feeling your face sink, you helped him stand straight as he glanced down at the fallen table. "You should have called for help then- everybody would need help for a gigantic table like this."

He only nodded in response, making you feel bad. You felt like you were lecturing him, technically you were, but you didn't want to find out in the future the reason he stopped attending work was because he pulled his back again.

"I'll drag this out," you declare as he tried slapping you hands away from it.

"It's too heavy for you!" he argued.

"Which is why I said drag," you countered back, ignoring his pleas as you somehow managed to lift the table back to its standing positioning.

Walking around it, you bent your back as you began pushing it around the curtain as Joon followed your position, crouching next to you for the extra support.

If it wasn't for the film crew being around the floor, you were sure you would have passed out right then and there. But you couldn't let them know how weak you were.

"And that's how teamwork makes the dream work," you announce, causing Joon to giggle before giving you a high-five as the two of you stand up from your bent posture.

Joon was another person you got along with incredibly well. For one, you guys were the duo out of all the interns. Every job you had that included another person, he was always there.

There was also the many times the two of you, and Jules of course, would carpool together to get home. It turned out Joon was also friends with some of your college classmates so he was always the only person from work who joined you guys for the random nights of cheesy movies and boring games while eating takeout with your other friends.

Despite hanging out for so long, you felt dense when someone called him Namjoon one time, even turning your head around for this Namjoon, completely oblivious to the fact that Joon was connected to Namjoon.

To be fair, he never went by his full name claiming that his nickname sounded more 'chill,' or whatever that meant.

Other than that, you were sure he was your other best friend. Well, after Jules and maybe Pedro. They were probably on the same level if you had to arrange them- not that friends had to ranked.

"Are you ready for this afternoon?" Joon called out as the two of you walked off the stage back to the curtains.

"For what?"

He sent you a surprised look, scaring you because is there something crazy happening that you had to prepare for? "Do you have your phone?"

Patting your back pocket, you shook your head. "I think I left it in my bag. Why? I'm about to cry if you don't tell me," you impatiently whine.

"What kind of fan you are," he simply responds, causing you to widen you eyes.

Immediately jumping on him, you shake his shoulders repeatedly. "What is the 1975 doing?! You must tell me or I swear to the gods I will bust your kneecaps and make you crawl for help."

He bursts out laughing at your threatening begs, trying to calm down your jumps by grabbing your shoulders to hold you. "You're violent."

"And you'll need surgery if you don't hurry it up."

Tapping your shoulder to calm down, you slowly do so. "3 o'clock is when their tickets go on sale for their upcoming tour, one of the dates being in New York City."

You could have sworn you were about to faint if it weren't for Joon pulling out his phone to show you you still had time to mentally prepare for the combat you were about to enter.

That's what ticketmaster was, a war zone.

"How was I not aware of this?!" you cry out, internally panicking about what you were going to do. You can't miss out on this concert, you just had to see these British people in person in order for your life to be complete.

"They did just post the news half an hour ago," he admitted. "Good for you for not being addicted to your phone."

Scowling at him, he quickly closed his mouth as you went over all the things you needed to do to prepare. "Wait, can we go together? None of my guy friends like them."

If you weren't in your own world mentally planning how you were going to beat all these teenage girls online, you would have noticed Pedro walking up to the two to you. But you didn't because your mind couldn't stop thinking about Matty Healy singing 'She's American' because you were indeed American.

"Why does she look deranged?" Pedro questioned, standing a few feet away from you. "Oh no, did Matty Healy die?"

Glaring at him, you ignore his irrelevant comment and face back to Joon. "You and me, my place straight after work. Got it?"

He nods, already in game mode because he knows how bad the two of you need to witness this concert.

Pedro exchanged a crazed look between the two of you, assuming his own ideas as to what you meant. "You're having a party and didn't invite me?" he tried joking to understand the conversation a bit more.

"No time for fooling around, Pedro," you state, grabbing Joon by his arm and making your way back to the office to search for your phone. "We have important business to settle, see you around!"

He watched the way Joon and you walk away hurriedly and wonders if you have a thing for the boy. It would make sense right? Joon was around the same age and he saw you guys work together all the time.

Shaking his head, he walks back to the stage trying to not overthink whatever was flowing in his head. But he couldn't help but question why he was never invited to your place? He instantly rejected that idea, he was twice your age. There's no way that was realistically appropriate.

However, you were friends- so wasn't it hypothetically okay?

No, there was no way he was really debating this. It's completely understandable why he didn't need to be invited over and Joon could.

But how many times did Joon come over?

Stop. His thoughts were confusing him and he needed a distraction. He wasn't going to let another man make him envy of where his friendship stood with you because there is no way he's jealous Joon might take his close friend status.

Because that's who you were to him, a close friend.

After another hour of working with Joon secretly about the tickets while emailing more people who Finn ordered, you two were finally cut for the day.

And luckily you still had two hours before the tickets went on sale.

"I need to grab my coat I left backstage, meet me outside?" Joon asked and you nodded, waving him off as you put on your own coat and bag.

Sprinting out of the office, you didn't expect to fall on the floor by the the person who ran into you. Well, the person fell to the floor while you comfortably landed on top of them, their arms wrapping around you.

"If you missed me that much you should've just texted me sooner to drop by," you heard the culprit chuckle, immediately making you shake their secured hands off your waist to stand.

"That was definitely not the case," you laugh, sticking a hand out to help him get up.

He raises a brow while staring at your hand before taking it, instantly pulling you back down with him. Falling over again, you slowly slip into his arms before finding your balance and giving up on helping him.

"How adorable of you to think you can lift me up," he grins, pulling his own weight up.

"I would love to stay and chat," you start, before looking past him and back again. "But I have something very important to do."

Trying to move around him, he stops you by grabbing your shoulder. "That's why I came to be a generous person and offer you a ride- so you can be home faster and do whatever you needed to do with Josh."

"His name's Joon."

"That's what I said," he ignores you're doubtful glance. "I can take you guys to your apartment."

Thinking it over, it would make it easier and faster to get home and prepare for the sale. If you would've taken a cab and subway it would have been an hour, with him it'll be half that.

"Fine," you spit out and watch as his face lights up. "But I am not owing you anything, you offered."

"Love how two months ago you would've begged the world for me," he placed a hand over his heart. "Oh how comfortable you've gotten with me."

"I don't want to hear it," you shun him, walking past him as he makes a silly face behind your back. "I can feel that!" He immediately stops, surprised you sensed it.

Maybe the two of you gotten a long too well.

"He's gonna drive us to my place, it'll be faster," you quickly explain to Joon who just nods, happily smiling at Pedro who sends him a fast greeting.

Right as you walk through the parking garage and see the familiar black car, Pedro unlocks it before quickly pushing you into the passenger seat, ignoring your protests and slamming the door before you could slip out.

"Not cool," you utter once he buckles inside the driver's seat.

"Don't make me cry," he fake cries before pulling the car out and hitting the road back to your place.

Due to it being the weekend and everybody wanting to be social and outside for some reason, the streets were packed.

It didn't help that Pedro thought starting a deep conversation with Joon about why electric cars annoyed him, knowing damn well Joon loved the environment, was a good idea.

And Pedro's defense being because he loved the smell of gas made you want to slap him.

As if the heavens felt your annoyance, your wish was granted. You were finally in the front of your apartment complex with Pedro pulling up along the red curb. You would've fought him, but you were desperate to get inside as you barely had an hour left.

"Thanks, see you Monday!" you exclaim, jumping out of the car and slamming the door shut. "Let's go, Joon!"

Barely stepping a foot out, you heard Pedro begin talking. "Wait, what are you guys gonna do?"

"Very intense work," Joon stated before turning to you. "But we got this in the bag."

Pedro squints his eyes, curiously scanning your body language because he does not know what this very intense work meant.

Working out? Making out? What the hell was it?

"Of course we do, love has no limits," you declare, making Pedro cough as you grabbed Joon's arm. "Now, let's go!"

"What are you two going to eat?!" Pedro called out, making you heavily sigh and turn back around.

Faking a smile, you gritted your teeth. "Don't know. Maybe we'll cook or make Jules' grab food as we work."

He makes a face, not convinced he wants to let you guys leave. Now that he was here and his day was over with, he didn't want to be alone.

But he also didn't want to tell you he wanted to stay. He wanted you to invite him- but you weren't getting the hint. Or maybe you were, but you couldn't have him in the room while working with Joon.

"That's cool, did you know I make a killer chicken alfredo?" he speaks out, making you pull an interested face as you were very much not. "Especially with garlic bread."

"Make sure to make that once you get home, safe travels," you wave, trying to turn away but was once again stopped by his voice.

You could feel your kindness slowly leaving your body. Was this the day you would be arrested and charged for murder?

"You know what's the secret with making the pasta?" Pedro questions as Joon replies back a curious, "What?"

"The sauce!" he exclaims as you try to control yourself. He was definitely pushing your buttons but you had to stay calm- you had to.

Joon was too interested in the conversation Pedro was beginning, trying to ask what was in this mysterious sauce. You knew you had to interject or you would both be ticketless.

"Maybe you can tell us about this secretive sauce on Monday, when we next see you," you force a laugh, trying to slowly take a few steps back to inch towards the entrance doors. "We really have to g-"

"Why wait till Monday when I can tell you now?" he claps, getting reading to explain his recipe. "For starters, you need a thick, sauce that can sp-"

"Oh my god!" you squeal, causing both men to jump and stare at you in shock as you rambled on. "The parking structure is around the block, my number is 912- just park and come up! Let's go, Joon!"

With that, Joon and you ran inside and Pedro smiled to himself. His planned worked. He guessed the only way to get to you was by speaking nonsense until you gave in- he'll remember that in the future.

Rushing through your door, you took your coat off as Joon pulled his laptop out if his backpack and set it next to your desk.

You looked at it confusingly before asking, "you carry your laptop with you to work?"

"Duh, an intern should always be prepared for computer work," he replies as if it was the obvious rule we should all know.

Shrugging, you turned on your PC and immediately went to ticketmaster, finding that the tickets weren't going on sale until 35 minutes from now. "We still have time to breathe." That was until you heard light knocks on your door. "Spoke too soon."

Walking up to your door, you see that no one was out there.

That was until Pedro decided to jump out from the side and scare the living shit out of you.

"I'm not doing this," you glare, trying to slam the door on his face, but he forced his way in while laughing at the scream you exhaled before.

You stared at him with no expression as he fell to the floor, continuing to laugh as if your fear was the funniest thing in the world. Joon was even silently giggling in the corner, stopping when you made eye-contact with him.

Trying to find a bowl to fill with water so you could throw at him, your plans were interrupted when you heard your roommate's voice boom across the room.

"Who the fuck is making so much noise?! Some of us are trying to sleep- ah! Why is Mr. Boss here?" Jules' gasps, jumping behind the hallway wall and peeking only her head out, too embarrassed to show off her hello kitty pajamas.

"He's gonna make us some pasta with his secret sauce," Joon happily states as she just gives him a confused look.

"Plus, it's almost 3 in the afternoon...," Pedro adds, giving her a baffled look as to why she is barely waking up.

She just gives him an awkward glance before running back to her room, shutting the door. Saturday's were her day off, of course waking up after 5pm was normal.

"The time limit just turned green! Refresh to join the waiting room-" Joon began screeching, doing so on his computer as you jumped around Pedro to do the same on your PC.

Slowly walking up to where Joon was, Pedro began examining the situation you two were in. Reading over your computer screen, his face fell. "The 1975 2022 World Tour...were you guys seriously trying to buy concert tickets this whole time?!"

Joon and you exchanged innocent glances to one another, not sure if he was judging you for your dedication.

"No, we still are trying to buy tickets," you simply reply, pushing him away from your computer.

His negativity was bad luck.

"This is why you were rushing to get home? All for-"

"Be gone, pessimist. Your energy is not it," you frown, moving your game chair to block his view from your screen. "Joon, block your computer, we can't afford his cynical attitude to ruin our chances of making out with Matty Healy."

"Making out with Matty Healy? You still want that? How is he gonna notice you?" Pedro asks, trying hard not to laugh in your face.

You were quiet for a minute. It was just a crazy thing you said because of all the videos you had seen online whenever it was somebody's birthday or they were just a lucky fan in the front.

You weren't actually dedicated to kissing him, but you did wish.

Joon slowly raised his finger, pointing at Pedro. "You're famous, right? Maybe if you went he'll notice us?"

Eyes widening, Pedro quickly shook his head as you placed your hand over your mouth. He was right, maybe he wouldn't kiss you, but he would for sure meet you if he found out a famous actor with over a million followers on Instagram attended his show.

"Not a chance," Pedro declared, ignoring your puppy dog gaze as you just hoped doing it for long would make him so uncomfortable he would give in.

Nudging Joon, he followed your actions with the sad stare, the two of you in front of the poor actor, leaving him really no choice. You were even thinking about calling Jules out to help, but she probably wouldn't appreciate it by her state of looking homeless.

But if it were on a work day she would totally be in.

"You just look like a deformed bull terrier," he says, pulling a disgusted face. "It's kind of unattractive."

"What is that?" you urge, watching Joon hold a laugh.

"The target dog," Joon answers for you.

Shrieking, you smack Pedro in the arm. "My god, woman! You always hit me."

"You're coming with us to the concert," you announce, watching him roll his eyes. Before he could reject your demand, you beat him to it, "if you don't I'm never talking to you again."

"Please, I've been wishing for that for weeks now," he cheers. "Plus, I'm pretty sure I am busy the day they come."

Pulling yourself close to the computer, you check to see the day they were arriving. "So you're saying you aren't free November 7th?"

"Kid, that's basically a year from now. I can't guarantee anything."

"Damn, you're right," you frown, your mood going down. Joon's idea was pretty amazing, but just wrong timing since the concert was so far away. "You can leave now."

"And what about that famous chicken alfredo?" Pedro chuckled, finding your change in demeanor amusing. You must really love these indie boys.

You were about to reply when Joon intervened. "Oh my god! We are in the queue!"

Twisting your head, you could see the clock had hit 3 o'clock exactly. How did time go by that fast?

"Holy shit! Everybody disconnect from the house wifi on your phones! We can not have anything disturbing us!"

Pulling out your phone, you did what you ranted on and made sure Joon did the same. You even ran to Jules' door and banged on it until she confirmed she did so.

Running back to the computer, you could see there was still 983 people in front of you while Joon had 754. "Why is your computer going faster?"

"This laptop-," he sheepishly smiled. "-cost a fortune, but works like a charm."

Turning back to the screen, you saw the purple line move closer. Not even three minutes in and you only had 534 people left while Joon had 312.

You don't know what you did, but God was certainly rewarding you.

"You're honestly really weird," Pedro confessed, staring at your computer screen. "And sad."

"You would be if you were about to buy tickets to see the love of your life."

"I wouldn't pay anything, money can't buy love," Pedro insists, pulling a chair from your table and placing it in between Joon and you.

"That's very romantic," you swipe an imaginary tear from your cheek. "Save it for the cameras."

His jaw drops as you return back to your computer. In a few moments you were about to be inside the room and you were beyond scared. If you did not get these tickets you don't know how much longer you'll have to live.

"I'm in!" Joon shouts, causing you to jump to his screen.

Great, the two of you were going together anyway so it works out.

"Fuck, what's the presale code?!"

Placing your hands on your head as he begins to panic, you die inside. What the fuck were you going to do now? "Go on Twitter and check!"

To say Pedro was not intrigued would be a lie. It was very fascinating seeing how strongly engaged you were just for a damn ticket. To be honest, he thinks you would be great on a reality tv show- your expressions were just off the roof. He wonders if other people genuinely acted like you.

"It's probably something super simple, try 'thesound,'" you exclaim, watching as he typed right away but frowning when it denied it. "try 'somebodyelse.'"

After each attempt of every famous song they had, it was still wrong. What pissed you off even more was that fans were gatekeeping the code no matter how many times Joon and you tweeted for help.

Greedy little shits.

Eventually, your screen allowed you into the room as well. It was no use, you didn't have the code. "I think I'm going to have a panic attack," you clutch your chest as you felt your lips quiver from sadness. "We were so close."

Pedro just stared at you not believing how miserable you suddenly became. Is this how easily young people let concerts take over themselves? Do people really idolize artists that much to the point where they feel depressed if they don't get tickets?

He shivered imagining how BTS fans dealt with this pressure.

"Let me try," Pedro speaks up, pushing you to the side as he began typing away on your keyboard.

It never hurts to try, right?

Innocently clicking away, your face fell as the check mark appeared, unlocking the room for you. "He got in!"

Hurriedly jumping to the screen, Joon urged Pedro to do the same as you began searching through the seats. Instantly clicking on the floor, you hit the continue button for 2 seats.

Feeling your nerves kick in, your hands begin to shake as you typed in the needed information in order to complete your order. But once you pressed 'place your order," your world stopped.

Ignoring your surroundings, you only focused on the screen. Quietly praying, you're sure Joon and Pedro could hear your desperate requests to the ruler of the universe to grant you your biggest wish: these tickets.

You Got The Tickets To The 1975!

Feeling weightless, you screamed so loud you were sure your neighbors were going to call the cops. Joon looked over, doing the same cheers once he realized you two were set for the show.

Jumping out of your chair, you practically tackled Pedro to the ground as you wrapped your arms around his neck and planted him numerous kisses all over his cheeks.

For once, you were happy you managed to outlast his annoying-self.

"I will forever be grateful for your existence!" you cheer, squeezing his poor body in your arms as he tried to remain in balance, laughing at how nice you suddenly became.

Planting a big kiss on his forehead, you turn to Joon and jump together in happiness. You couldn't believe you managed to score tickets, especially floor seats.

"Wait, what was the code?" Joon asked, pulling away from you and turning to Pedro who tried containing his grin.

"The 1975."

You dropped you arms, feeling incredibly stupid. How could you not write their name as a code attempt? It was shorter than 'it's not living if it's not with you.'

"Joon, we are officially the two dumbest people in New York City," you confess as he slowly nods before stopping.

"Not dumber than Jules though."

You heard her door open before her loud yelling appeared, "Well fuck you too!"

Ignoring her, you jump to Pedro who had his gaze on you already. "Welp! Since we got that out of the way, why don't you make some of that chicken alfredo with your sauce."

He smiled before realizing what you were asking. "What sauce?"

You roll your eyes before hitting his side. "The secretive one you were bothering us about."

Pedro bounces up once he understands what he had mentioned earlier. "Oh, right. That one," he chuckles. "I was kidding, I just wanted to see what you guys were dong."

Your face falls as Joon lets out a sad sigh. "Man, I really wanted to taste how thick and creamy that sauce was."

Pedro just tilts his head to Joon before pointing at the door. "It was great hanging with you guys though! Hey, at least we all worked together for those tickets! I'm gonna head out now, have a good rest of your evening!"

With that, he awkwardly backs away and opens the door, quickly running out before you could argue why he would lie about such a thing.

Before you could process what had just happened, he quickly opens the door again and peeps his head inside. "By the way, you don't actually like a deformed bull terrier," he clarifies. "I was kidding, maybe a cavalier king charles spaniel, those are precious."

And again, he runs out. This time, your face was pretty noticeable when it came to how much redness was present. You cringed to yourself, the littlest of compliments always made you blush- it made you sick.

Joon and you exchanged confused looks to each other. Pedro was a very interesting man.

"What is a cavalier king charles spaniel?" you lightly question.

"The dog in the arms of an angel commercial," Joon simply replies.

Reaching his car, Pedro quickly unlocked the door before jumping in. He felt his heart beating fast, not sure why it was doing so.

Was it because he adored how committed you were for those damn tickets? Maybe. Or how your eyes sparkled once you realized you got the right code? Possibly.

How you kissed him and pulled him in close? Most definitely.

But he would never reveal such a thing to anyone. People would take it wrong and believe he had feelings for you. All he had were feelings one would have for another close friend like you.

His heart was beating because he was excited for you, that's all.

Walking around the studio Monday morning was exhausting. Not only did you pull an all-nighter Saturday night because you were too happy to fall asleep, but you only managed to gain a few hours of sleep on Sunday as you were too busy trying to finish homework due that same night.

"Are you alright? Do you need water?" you heard Bella worriedly ask as you pulled a hoodie over your head and walked near the snacks table.

"I need a pill that can wake me up."

"That could be arranged," she joked, stopping when you sent her a serious look. "Not by me, of course."

Bella managed to wake you up a little once she suddenly pulled out her phone and turned the flash on, flashing it all around your face. "Are you trying to make me blind?!"

"It's supposed to wake you up, is it working?" she grinned, still shoving her phone up your face.

Grabbing her wrist, she stops. "No."

"Damn, that sucks."

Somehow you managed to pull yourself together, walking to where the rest of the interns were once you heard all the directors call out for an urgent meeting.

Probably wanting one of you to run to the coffee shop for coffee as usual.

Seeing Pedro waving at you from the side of his cast's group, you smiled and returned it. He then proceeded to make a confused face, wondering why there was an emergency meeting being held.

You sent the same look, adding a shrug because you were feeling the same. You weren't aware about what was going on, but noticing how many people were present- it must be a big deal.

Finn walked in and stood near the director, sending you a smile that didn't look natural.

If anything it looked fake and...sad?

"A lot of you are probably wondering why I called everyone down here on this early morning," you hear one of the directors begin, making some people nod while others just patiently waited for him to continue. "Starting with wonderful news, we have just been given access to explore our visuals and proceed to try out different surroundings in regards to our planned perception for the series."

Hearing a few people clap, you do the same. You were glad that the set was upgrading, but what did they have to do with everyone?

"Unfortunately," you heard him begin, causing your breathe to hitch. "with locations being held in various places like Canada, we are going to have to make cuts."

Feeling your heart drop, you already knew who he was planning to remove. A big series like this can't send interns they don't care about out of the country for help and you sure as hell couldn't afford to pay for the travels yourself if it came down to it.

You didn't want to make eye-contact with Bella or Pedro and feel their condolences through their expressions. All you wanted to do was be cut already so you could go home and cry at home.

To cry over a job was pathetic, but considering how much you learned and loved to manage it for the past couple months, it was sad to let it go.

As the director went down the list of small departments he planned on letting go, he finally made it to yours. "As for the interns, we are especially grateful for the hard work you brought to this set and trying to fill not only our needs but the casts. If we have any open positions in the near future we will make sure to grant you priority, and if you ever need letters of recommendations for your future activities, I am sure Finn would be able to handle that behind closed doors..."

You zoned out after that, not really caring what else was being said. It was the typical its not us excuse, claiming the company couldn't provide for all of their workers yet were able to spend millions of dollars on each location and its visuals.

The meeting was over when you noticed the directors and producers giving a final sympathetic look to the crowd, bowing their heads before walking back to where their offices were located.

"I feel like crying," you heard Jules sniffle, patting her under eye with her sweater. "But I took time on my eye makeup so I can't!"

Rubbing her shoulder, you tried to distract her from her tears coming out as Joon stood next to you guys, telling her funny spongebob jokes that she did not understand.

"Uh oh, Mr. Boss is coming. He's gonna make me cry, I can't hear his sorrow," Jules' explained, turning her back the other way.

"Hey, kids," you heard Pedro lightly say.

"The tears are coming out!" Jules' exclaimed, running away to the nearest bathroom while Joon and you looked at each other, feeling extremely bad for her.

"Sorry about that," Pedro awkwardly started, continuing once you shook off his unnecessary apology. "I just wanted to talk, see how you guys are handling the unfortunate news."

Joon was the first to speak, sounding surprisingly calm for someone who just lost his internship. "It sucks, but at least it was for an understandable reason. Traveling costs money. Plus, we go to school here, we can't just leave."

You nodded, agreeing with what he said. It was true, you should have known this job would've ended sooner than later, there was only so much you could have done inside a film studio.

The series was an apocalypse that needed feature more outside and environmental sets that looked deadly than a building that was only useful for inside takes.

"How about you?" He questions, sincere eyes following yours as you shrug.

"I am sad but that's the industry," you force out a small chuckle. "If you aren't cut at least once, you aren't gaining the full experience."

Right after you said that, you felt tears lining around the inner corner of your eyes. Looking down, you tru to contain yourself. "I'm going to go check up on Jules."

Reaching out for you, Pedro tries to console you but you were out of his reach in seconds. He hated the tears in your eyes and his job being the reason behind it.

He felt as if it were his fault for your departure when he knows he shouldn't.

It also didn't make him feel any better that Joon followed straight after you once you walked away. He knew he had to do something but he wasn't sure.

All he knew was that he would rather see you smile than cry.

[nightsetter]

Aubrey Plaza movie & show reviews

i know i'm not the only one obsessed with aubrey rn so i thought i'd rank some of her stuff that i've seen and indicate whether her character is gay or not to help people decide what to watch. i'll keep adding to it and hope others will add their recommendations too!!

starting with the most recent:

1. Agatha All Along (2024 series) - Gay - 10/10 obviously it's why we're all here haha.

2. Megalopolis (2024 drama) - Not gay - worst movie i've ever seen in my life lmao. however you get the incomparable experience of watching a bitchy blonde aubrey plaza sit on a dude's face so. also all her outfits are incredible??? 0/10 don't bother watching, aubrey is only in a few scenes so just skip around to find those.

3. My Old Ass (2024 drama/comedy) - Gay - 10/10 watch this asap! i laughed i cried, like in the best way. aubrey is only in a couple scenes, a longer one kinda towards the beginning and then a short one at the end, she also does voiceovers throughout. her character is bisexual and the focus is a mlw relationship. she's fantastic in it and the whole movie is excellent, loved maisy stella too and their chemistry together.

4. Operation Fortune (2023 spy thriller) - Not gay - action movies aren't usually my thing but aubrey plays the role of a sexy hacker spy like she was born for it and i loved every second haha. i wish the script had lived up to her potential but it was still a fun watch. 8/10 for that one gold dress ALONE

5. Emily the Criminal (2022 drama) - Not gay - 10000/10 HIGHLY RECOMMEND my personal favorite so far!!! Aubrey co-produced and she plays the main character. when i tell you this woman had me ACTINGG UPPPPPP in this sweet mother of all that is holy- she looks so good in every scene and it's genuinely great start to finish. boyfriend aubrey plaza save me 🙏

6. Spin Me Round (2022 black comedy) - Gay - ok so this movie is batshit but there's a truly incredible makeout scene with alison brie's character... aubrey is only there for like 1/3 of the movie but she steals every scene and looks soooo good in it, amazing costume design. i'll give it a 6/10 for that and her chemistry with alison.

7. Best Sellers (2021 drama) - Not gay - i loved this one!! aubrey's talent and range blew me away, and it's a heartfelt story. she stars as a publishing company heiress who develops a father-daughter bond with an old cranky author. definitely up there with emily the criminal & black bear as some of her best work. 9/10

8. The White Lotus (2021-ongoing series) - Not gay - aubrey stars in season 2, which you can jump right into if you want because each season is a stand-alone story. i enjoyed s1 as a satire about different types of social privilege, s2 was way less interesting and i found myself just waiting for the next time aubrey was on screen lol. but she's amazing in a dramatic role and wears so many bikinis lord forgive meee- 7/10 overall.

9. Happiest Season (2020 rom com) - Gay - everyone has seen this, but aubrey plaza and kristen stewart in the same movie is WAY too powerful i think i blacked out at one point. alison brie is great too. 8/10 minus a couple because of the stupid ending and idk its a lil cheesy haha.

10. Black Bear (2020 drama) - Not gay - another one that she co-produced and starred in. ill be honest it was too straight for me to really enjoy lmao. its a meta dive into the indie film industry that went over my head at times but it's thought-provoking and clearly very personal to aubrey's life and career, especially how she works so closely with her husband. she is insanely insanely hot in it and really showcases her talent so ill give it a 7/10.

11. Child's Play (2019 slasher) - Not gay - tbh i thought this movie was hilarious loll. aubrey stars as the mom, i wish there'd been more of a focus on her, it's more from the son's perspective but she's awesome in it and it's cool to see her in a different type of role. 6/10 it was fun as far as horror movies go. tw for gore

12. An Evening With Beverly Luff Linn (2018 comedy) - Not gay - i dont even know what to say about this one dlkjfdl. 1/10 aubrey is the only good part.

13. The Little Hours (2017 black comedy) - Gay - bro this one is a RIDE... aubrey plaza as a crazy heretical nun is one of the funniest things i've everrrr seen. she co-produced and stars in it again with alison brie. hilarious movie for its target audience (me), aubrey kisses 2 women and there's one scene in particular that uhh 🥵 well. no sorry i mustn't say. 11/10 movie (in my very subjective opinion loll). tw for sexual assault.

14. Ingrid Goes West (2017 black comedy) - Not gay - she co-produced and stars in this opposite elizabeth olsen. aubrey is always at home playing freakish characters and the movie is pretty entertaining. i was disappointed by the glaring lack of gay subtext haha but ill give it a 7/10. tw for attempted suicide.

15. Legion (2017-2019 series) - Gay - this show was so boring but i guess kinda interesting sometimes? haha she appears in most episodes only briefly and unfortunately this has to be the hottest character she's ever played, she's sooo in her element just being totally unhinged. her best eps are 1x06, 2x05 (😳), second half of 2x09 (hooks up with a girl), honorable mention to 2x10/11 bc she's only in a couple scenes but looks so good. season 3 she gets a little more consistent screen time dressed like a hippie if you can imagine, also somehow gets a woman pregnant? LOL idk i lost the plot at some point... good luck if you decide to watch (you definitely should). 4/10 tw for sexual assault and suicide.

16. Addicted to Fresno (2015 black comedy/rom com) - Gay - aubrey plays the love interest to natasha lyonne's character in this. she's only in a handful of scenes and i love natasha but their chemistry wasnt great imo. it's fun tho and has a happy ending, there's one cute kiss at the end. plus sweaty gym clothes 😶 i'll give it a 5/10.

17. Ned Rifle (2014 drama) - Not gay - i must be crazy for actually liking this movie kdfjd. kinda funny, very weird/disturbing, like an indie cult vibe. it's the 3rd film in a trilogy so you'll have to read summaries of the first 2 to follow what's going on. aubrey plays a starring role and her character does have an unsettling storyline but she's still soo fineeee and talented in it ugh. 5/10 its for a certain audience lmao, you'll either like it or hate it. tw for suicide and themes about sexual grooming.

18. The To Do List (2013 comedy) - Not gay - i probably would have liked this more when i was in high school haha but it's still pretty funny. she plays the nerdy main character experimenting with sex for the first time, so. a lot of what would you would expect with that 😭 god is real that's all i can tell you, 7/10

19. Parks and Recreation (2009-2015 series) - Not gay - this is the one she's famous for of course but for anyone who hasn't seen it, she gets a decent amount of screen time in an ensemble cast playing an adorably chaotic intern. 8/10 recommend if you're looking for a half hour sitcom, it's a great time :)

20. Criminal Minds (2005-ongoing series) - Gay - i only watched 4 episodes so can't speak on the quality of the show as a whole but i loved her soo much in it. she plays a femme fatale hitwoman which is the perfect aubrey role lmao. there are mentions of her relationships with women, but the focus is on her interest in a guy. She stars in 11x11, 12x22, and 15x6. also makes a brief appearance at the end of 12x21. 8/10 no complaints, totally worth watching for her.

i hope this is helpful to someone and please add more reviews if you'd like!

[piffany666]

Redacted vamps favourite vampire representation in the media!

Vincent: twilight

This man unironicall loves twilght

100% wore a "team edward" shirt

Lovey: castlvania

When they first met Porter and saw how he interacted with vincent they immediately thought of how Trevor Belmont and alucard are with eachother

Sam: buffy the vampire slayer

He likes the parts where its accurate to what actually happens

He likes that the focus isnt necessarily on the vampires themselves

He watched it before he was turned and it became his comfort show when he was turned

Faith reminds him too much of alexis so he skips the faith heavy episodes

William: interview with a vampire

In redacted veres "interview with a vampire" 100% happend

William personaly knew every vampire in that book

He thought the movie was just ok

Porter: hellsing

Tells william that his favourite is the 2nd interview with a vampire novel "the vampire lastat" but its actually the 2005 hellsing tv series (suck up!)

He thinks hellsing ultimate is awesome to he just prefers the original just because it was around fist

For a while he dressed like alucard and quoted him daily

Alexis: interview with a vampire ( just the movies)

Refuses to read the books

Thought "queen of the damned" was the best

Bright eyes: lost boys

Loved it when they where alive became a comfort film once turned

Has a t shirt that says "there just noodels Michael"

Also loves hellsing but has exclusively watched the abridged version

Also quotes that daily

Fredrik: thinks that it's wrong to profit off of somthing as horrible as being turned into a vampire so he boycotts all vampire related depictions in the media (since turning)

[daydreamingmia]

News💙

Walker Scobell X Reader | Series | You Belong With Me🔱 Part 8

A/n: The time lines is gonna be a little off in some of these stories. Like Marvel's release dates etc.

You and Walker have been dating for about a month. You've never been so happy.💜

You were sound asleep when you heard your phone buzz. You rolled over and looked at it.

You roll out of bed onto the floor. You stand up and get changed.

You get in an Uber and drive to where you were going to film the video.

                      🔱PETER JOHNSON GC⚡️

Dior: WE'RE BACK BABY!!

Walker: Let's goooo

Aryan: So excited

Charlie: 🥳🥳

                                           Y/n: Yayyy!! I'm so happy!

Dior: me too!!

                                                            Y/n: I can't wait!

Walker: I'll have a

girlfriend this season😉

                                                           Y/n: and I'll have

                                                             a boyfriend🥰

Aryan: gross

Charlie: After you guys

finish that video you wanna

come over to my house and

we can celebrate?

Charlie: Leave the romance

at home🤨

Dior: yesss

Walker: sounds great

                                          Y/n: that sounds awesome

Aryan: I can't. It's

my friend's birthday

Dior: How dare they be

born on the day of the

announcement?!😠😂

Dior: Wish them a

happy birthday 💙

Charlie: Wish them a

happy birthday for us!

Wish you could come

though

                                         Y/n: that sounds fun! Wish

                                               them a happy birthday!

                                               We will miss you🤍

Walker: no we won't

                                                                  Y/n: Walker!

Walker: Fine we will 😁

You look up to see you were here. You get out and go inside.

"Season 2 baby!!" You throw your hands in the air and everyone cheers

"Hey" Walker comes up to you and kisses you

"Hey" you reply after the kiss

"So what's the plan?" You ask hanging on Walker

"Basically you'll just hold this cake and blow in these noisemakers"

"K" You reply

You let go of Walker because they hand him the cake. You stand on his left Aryan on his right.

"Action!" They yell

The noisemakers sound filled the room. Walker was blowing it in your and Aryan's ears so it was even louder. He was having too much fun.  "Payback" you thought

You grabbed a chunk of the cake and looked at Walker. He knew what you were doing. Aryan copied you. He backed into the wall and blocked the cake with his hands. Everyone was laughing.

"Hey that's a good idea. Y/n would you be okay with it if Aryan and Walker push your face in the cake. Walker looked at you with a mischievous smile. You glared at him then smile.

"I'm fine with that" you laugh

"Cool. 3. 2. 1." She pointed at you

You bent over and Walker and Aryan put their hands on the back of your head. They pushed your head down gently but also hard at the same time. It was hard to explain. Your face went into the cake and everyone erupted in laughter including you. You picked your face up out of the cake and you couldn't see anything. You were covered and it was thick.

"Can you breathe?" You heard Walker ask as you were still laughing

"Y/n can you breathe?" Wake asked again and you shake your head

You wiped your face with your hands and wiped them on Walker's face. You did the same to Aryan.

Everyone was dying in laughter

-

"Hey can you guys kiss in front of the crushed cake?"

"Yeah! But should we get the cake if our faces first? " You ask

"No need. I think its cute and funny"

"Okay" You giggle

Walker dips you and you kiss as you wrap your arms around him.

"Perfect" They say as Walker lifts you back up

-

You get the cake off of your face and get into an Uber with Walker.

The drive was a little long but you knew it would be worth it.

You get out of the car and wake runs the doorbell and Dior answered.

"New season!" You hug her

"I know! I'm so excited!!" She hugged you back

"How long ago did you get here?" Walker asked

"About 20 minutes ago" She replied

"I'm sorry we kept you waiting!" You apologized

"Don't worry about it" she said very sweetly

"Hey Charlie!" You walk into the living room where he is on his phone

"Hey" He gets up and hugs you

"Do you guys wanna ride around the neighborhood on a golf cart? My mom has one." He asked

"Yess!" Dior exclaimed

"Awesome!" Walker replied

"Cool!" Aryan said

"Oooo! Can I drive?! PLEEEAAAASSSSEEE" You asked

"Sure" He chuckled

-

You got into the cart and put the key in

"Okay so this is the the gas, that is the brake, that is the shift." Charlie explained

Then Walker turned you around really quickly and kissed you

"What was that?" You asked blushing when he pulled away

"I just wanna kiss you one last time before we all die" Walker said getting into the back of the cart

"We aren't gonna die you idiot" You roll you eye

Everyone got in and you pushed the gas.

IT STARTED GOING IN REVERSE

"Oops" You said slaming on the brake and everyone grunted

"I can see the headlines...Y/n kills the cast of Percy Jackson...Annabeth killing everyone was not the show ending we expected" Walker said sarcastically

"Shut up!" You replied and pushed the gas as it went foward this time

You were driving for a few minutes and winked at Dior. You slammed in the gas and Walker went flying off of the cart with a scream. You were laughing so hard. Walker was running by the side of the cart and you went faster. As Dior took a video of him fighting to get back on.

"Why didn't you slow down?" He asked out of breath when he finally jumped on

"Oops. Wrong petal." You said sarcastically

"You tried to leave me behind on purpose!" Walker gasped

"Maybe" you mischievously grinned

"If you weren't driving I'd push you off too but we don't need you to crash this thing any sooner than you already are" He said with fake attitude

"Yeah. Yeah. Yeah." You brush it off

"I want evidence of your bad driving" Walker said as he pulled his phone out of his pocket

When he turned it on you had to be the best driver ever

"Oh so now she's a good driver. Maybe if leave this video on you wont actually kill us" Walker snickers

Charlie pulls out his phone and takes a video too. Walker turns around and flips off the camera.

"Walker" Charlie said turning it off before they could see it

"What?" Walker said innocently

As Charlie rolled his eyes and turned the video to you and Dior.

"Dior Dior" Walker said in a really funny voice

"Y/n" Charlie said so you turned around

"Hey eyes on the road" He said pointing

"Hey look lights!" Walker said looking down under his seat

Then suddenly you turn around and shove him off of the cart

"She's trying to get rid of me" Walker accused

Everyone was just dying laughing

When he got back on we were about to make a sharp turn

"Ok-okay slow down...push the brakes...slow down y/n...SLOW DOWN!" Walker said very very nervously

"Shut up! You're messing up my concentration you said lightly pushing the brakes

"Oh she's getting better" Dior said excitedly as Walker sighed in relief

"He is such a baby" you roll your eyes

-

You get off the cart and go back inside.

"We survived!" Walker said with his fists in the air

You glared at him

"I always knew we would make it" He says not wanting to make you mad

"Ha! Then why were you crying?" You mock

"I wasn't crying!" He defended himself

"You were very close" you laugh holding his hand and going inside

-

You got back from driving the golf cart about 30 minutes ago. Everyone decided to go on insatgram and like the fan's posts that you saw in honor of season 2.

"Hey you wanna play table tennis?" Walker asked

"Yeah!" Everyone replies

We walk over and start thinking about how we can play.

"Okay Walker you and Charlie play. Then Dior and I will play. Whoever wins from each team will go against the other winner." You boss them around

"You really are perfect for Annabeth" Walker chuckled and picks up the paddle

-

"You can do it Walker!" You cheer

"Destroy him" You say very jokingly creepy

"Yikes" Dior giggled sitting next to you

"You cheated!" Walker accused

"I cheated you cheated!" Charlie yelled back

"How did I cheat?!" Walker questioned

"They are so childish" You roll your eyes to Dior as they were still yelling at eachother in the backround

"I know it's like they are 4" Dior replied

"Y/n! Who won this round me or Charlie?" Walker asked you

"YOU CAN'T ASK HER SHE'S BIASED!" Charlie yelled at Walker

"Rude" You glare

"Fine. Dior who won?" Walker asked Dior

"OH NO! I'm not getting into this" Dior shook her head

"FINE. I won" Walker put his paddle down

"What?! Why do you get to decide?!" Charlie asked

"Just...because" Walker said quietly

"You know what...that's fine. I've seen how y/n plays and she'll probably beat Dior. Then you'll have to go up against you girlfriend." Charlie said pointing to you

"I'm not afraid of her." Walker shrugged

"Ha. You should be" Dior chuckled

"On second thought... you won." Walker said with a sudden smile

"Ohhh no. You got yourself into this mess" Charlie snickered

"Ugh" Walker whined

-

You and Dior played and of course you won. And unlike the boys there was no screaming. More laughing.

"Well Walker I just want you to know whatever happens...I still love you" You say putting your hands on his shoulders

"Love you too?" Walker looked weirded out

"You make it sound like he's gonna win" Dior laughed

"Of course he's not gonna win. I just wanted the...drama effect" You pause and look into the air very seriously then start laughing

-

The score was 9-5. You had the 9.

"Come on Y/n! Don't go easy on him! Crush him!" Dior said putting her fist in her palm (sorry I hope you know what I mean I don't know how to describe it)

"I'm trying to! He's really good!" You say hitting the ball and Walker misses

"Point y/n!" Charlie announced

"One more point and she will win the game" Charlie said in a very serious voice

"Point Walker!"

"Point Walker!"

"Point Walker!"

"Hold on... how is Walker suddenly getting these points?" Charlie said looking at you suspiciously

"Luck?" You shrug

"Ahuh" Charlie said skeptically

"Walker is very lucky. I mean he's dating me right?" You said said with a giggle

"Y/n don't go easy on me. Play like you would if I weren't me" Walker asked

"I'm am" You defend yourself

"Are you?" He gave you a look

"100 percent" You said trying not to make it look like you were lying"

"Okay" Walker shrugged

"Point Walker! Okay they're tied. Miraculously Charlie looked at you but you ignored him

You actually almost missed the ball but you didn't.

"Y/n wins!" Charlie held your hand up in victory

"Y/n! Y/n! Y/n! Y/n! Y/n! Y/n!" Dior and Walker cheered

"Do you still love me?" You go up to Walker and kiss him

"No I don't. I've been the happiest I've ever been in my entire life for the past month but I don't think it can work out. You're too good at table tennis." He said sarcastically still hugging you

"You let him have every point he got didn't you?" Dior asked as everyone was walking out to the firepit

"Yeah" you shrugged

You got outside and sat down in the circularchairs around the fire. Walker on your right, Dior on your left, Charlie between Dior and Charlie. Walker moves his chair a little closer to yours and holds your hand.

"I'm so excited for next season!" You say

"Camp Halfblood is back!" Dior exclaims

-

You sit for a while and talk.

"Hey you guys want some pizza?" You ask

"Yes I'm starving!" Dior exclaims

"I'm so hungry" Walker said

"Yess" Charlie chimed in

You order 2 large cheese pizzas.

"I'm getting cold. I'm gonna go get my jacket." You say standing up

"I'll get it" Walker says gently pushing it back down

"There's a blanket on the couch if you want it" Charlie points

Walker comes back and picks you up bridal style and sits you on his lap then lays the blanket on you. He kisses you and you lay your head on his shoulder.

"Gross" Charlie complains

"Shut up" Walker retorts

There you were with the boy that you loved and your best friends (-Aryan) sitting by the campfire. Everyone was so happy. Then your phone rang.

"I've gotta take this" you say standing up

"noooo don't leave" Walker whines holding onto your hand

"Walker let go of me" You laugh as you fight your hand out of his

You walk to the side of the house and answer it.

                        Brother of mischief💚

                                                                   hey brother! 

Hey sis! Did you hear the news?!

                             About season 2 of Percy Jackson?

                                                   I know I'm so excited

oh! Congratulations!

                                                                     Thank you

But I'm talking about Thor

We were got the OK for another movie!

                                      omg! That's awesome!...wait

                                            when does filming start?

Umm I don't know probably in

like England or Australia like before...why?

                         um...no reason. Do you know when

                                    we are going to start filming?

They said in a week

                                                                      A WEEK?!

yeah. Is everything okay?

                                   yeah...yeah everything is fine.

                                                        That's just so soon

They wanted to start filming

as soon as possible because

they said you have to film Percy Jackson

                                                                                yeah

I'm sorry if you're upset about this.

I thought you would be happy

(his voice was very sympathetic)

                    no. no. It's not your fault. Its amazing!

             I'm so happy to be filming with you again

Me too

                                          I'm sorry I have to go now

Okay. I'm sorry

                                      don't be this is a good thing!

                                                                                 Bye

Bye

                                 --END CALL--

You hang up the phone and just sit there for a minute. How are you going to tell Walker. You won't. At least not right now. He's so happy with the second season you can't ruin it right now.

You were having conflicted emotions. You loved filming Thor. You loved Tom and Chris. They were like your real brothers. You felt bad that you made Tom sad when he should be happy. But you didn't want to leave Walker.

You take a deep breathe and walk to where everyone was.

"Who was that?" Walker asks moving the blanket so you can sit back down

"Umm. Nobody. Well my mom. She was asking if I'd be home for dinner." You say kinda weird

"O-okay" Walker replied as you sat down

"Pizza is here!" Charlie said coming from inside the house

-

The two pizzas were almost gone. Everyone was full.

"Is everything okay?" Walker asks you his beautiful blue eyes looking at you

"Yes! Everything is fine! Why do you ask?" You try to play it off

"I don't know. You've been acting kinda weird." Walker shrugs

"I'm fine" you smile

-

You fell asleep in Walker's arms. So warm. So nice.

"We should get going" Dior says so you can have an actual bed to sleep in

"Yeah" Walker yawns

"I'll drive you two home" Dior said standing up

Walker picks you up and carries you to Dior's car.

Next thing you knew you were at your house.

"hey. wake up" Walker whispers in your ear

"I don't want to leave. I don't want to leave you" You mumble in your sleep

"I know y/n. But we are here" He strokes your hair

"what?" You start sitting up

"We are at your house" Walker looks at you sweetly

"Oh. Okay. was I saying something a minute ago?" You ask

"Yeah you said you don't want to leave me but you have to...I mean I think Dior will probably mind if you d sleep in her car all night" Walker chuckled

"Yeah that's what I meant" You say with worry in your eyes (you almost slipped about Thor)

"what?" Walker asked confused

"nothing" you reply and get out of the car

Walker walks you to the door and quickly kiss him

"What was that for?" He asks looking in your eyes

"I just love you" You smile

"Are you sure everything is okay?" He asks you

"Yeah" you nodded

"Okay. Goodnight" he respond knowing something was up

"Goodnight" You kiss him one more time and go inside

-

You changed into your pajamas and sat on your bed. Your face in your hands. You decide to ask Taylor what you should do.

It had been around an hour since you got home. After you talked to Tayloe you were just sitting there quietly...thinking.

You look at your phone to see Dior texted.

A/n: I hope you liked this chapter! Thank you so much for reading! Sorry it took a little while to write. The movie is Ragnarock. The timing is off on this and a few other things in the future. Sorry💙

P.S. This is Y/n's Resume😁👇

[lilibethmg]

love on tour | a.h.

a/n: welcome to my first social media fic of hopefully many!! i have a whole universe planned out within the british youtuber group and i thought who best to introduce the series with than arthur hill!!! all work will be ocs not xreaders

@kamrynkam

liked by arthurnfhill and 5,937 others

popped down to london to film the double denim music video today!! out on friday if you’re lucky x (and thanks to my wonderful camera man @arthurnfhill)

comments…

userone arthur and kam interaction???

| usertwo the way they are my new fave duo

userthree r u guys dating?

userfour i love your music kam!!!!

| kamrynkam tysm <3333

| userfour OMG KAM NOTICE

arthurnfhill i expect to be paid for my services

| kamrynkam oops.. maybe next time?

| | userfive NEXT TIME??

@kamrynkam

liked by arthurnfhill, georgeclarkeey and 4,937 others

surprise! we’re going on tour! tickets link is in my bio if you fancy seeing us x

its gonna be one hell of a show.. i wouldn’t want to miss it!!

comments…

arthurnfhill ar-tour! ar-tour! ar-tour!

| kamrynkam i want a funky name for tour too :(

| arthurnfhill i’ll work on it 🫡

userone i got manchester tickets!!!!

usertwo omg can’t wait to see you two

georgeclarkeey looking forward to meeting you (especially after everything arthur has told me about you)

| kamrynkam all good things i hope!!

| georgeclarkeey terrible, terrible things

@kamrynkam

liked by arthurnfhill, arthurtv and 5,924 others

tour has been a blast so far! london you’re up next 👀 it’s so surreal coming out on stage and seeing you lot go crazy, thank you for having the best energy ❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥

comments...

userone can’t wait for tonight!!!

usertwo you were so good last night <3

saderah gonna cheer the loudest for you tonight

| arthurnfhill not if i cheer louder

| saderah let me flirt with your girlfriend please!

this comment has been deleted.

userthree DID NO ONE ELSE SEE THAT??

@kamrynkam

liked by arthurnfhill, lisahull_hill and 5,926 others

ar-tour/kam-fest was awesome!! you guys were all so lovely and have made my year xx

p.s. do we want passing thought (feat. kam) to be released 👀

comments…

userone you were so good!!!

usertwo yours and arthur’s voices sounded heavenly together omg

| kamkamryn tysm oh my gosh <3

lisahull_hill you were brilliant darling!

| kamkamryn thank you lisa 🥹

userthree can’t believe i got to meet you!! thank you for being so lovely

arthurnfhill ❤️

| kamkamryn mwah

userthree your chemistry was a little too good for my liking 🤔🤔🤔

saderah girl you were awesome!!!!!

| kamkamryn love you sade :((

@kamrynkam

liked by arthurnfhill, saderah and 6,293 others

‘i’d step on lego for you’ is now all yours! i hope you guys have as much fun listening as i did making it! this ep is a collection of my favourite songs i’ve made in the past year with 2 brand new songs!!! let me know your favourite song on the ep!!! 🩵

comments…

arthurnfhill forever proud of you

| kamrynkam ❤️‍🔥

| | userone HELLO??!?

usertwo naked poetry goes so hard!!

userthree afterlife is a banger tbf

saderah straight fire!! no skips!! she’s done it again!!!

| kamrynkam stop it 🤭

userfour WHO IS THAT IN THE LAST PHOTO???

| userfive i think we all know 👀 @arthurnfhill thoughts?

commented liked by kamrynkam

@kamrynkam

liked by arthurnfhill, saderah and 4,834 others

finally found my muse ❤️‍🔥

comments…

userone hard launch 🤔

| kamrynkam hard launch 😌

usertwo OH MY GOSH!!!!

saderah sister-in-law!!

| kamrynkam sister-in-law!!!!!!!

arthurnfhill i expect 3 songs about me written by the end of the week (love you x)

| kamrynkam stfu loser 😭😭 (love you too x)

userthree 2nd photo is giving rockstar’s girlfriend

| kamrynkam *rockstar girlfriend