#attempt number 1 of posting this
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darkdragon768 · 2 years ago
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Nightmares
"Promise me you'll still be there when I wake up"
Part 2 of 2
Previous Part
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lurking-loaf · 1 year ago
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Oh wow! Look! It’s really Sun!
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captainkirkk · 10 months ago
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When I started writing 'lessons in tea making', I set out to make it a longfic that following ATLA Book 2 and 3 in its entirety but now its been almost 5 years and I'm realising that I'm probably never going to get around to finishing this monster of a wip
HOWEVER, I do have around 15k of chapter 2 collecting dust in my google drive so.... what's everyone's opinion on authors uploading (signposted) unfinished chapters....
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tittyinfinity · 27 days ago
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contemplating deleting my blog soon I might make a new blog but idk
#.bdo#i just need to work on some insecurity issues is all. been on a long self journey this year#can't shake the feeling that every time i say anything it's wrong somehow#and there is some reality to that. i have been wrong several times I've even been downright mean to people over misunderstandings#i just haven't been able to break out of the habit of feeling permanently embarrassed about every small mistake I've ever made#& old insecurities from my childhood are resurfacing#like when i was a kid/teen and no one would ever tell me when i was breaking social cues but they'd make fun of me behind my back#i have 3200 followers and most of my posts get 0 notes sometimes i get 1-5 so it makes me feel like I'm doing something wrong#i end up deleting a lot of them...#almost every post of mine that's gone viral was just a screenshot or picture saved from somewhere else....#and the times that i have gotten attention over a post that stands up for people who aren't like me it makes me terrified#that i look like i'm trying to play a savior role or like i'm virtue signaling#i have a few good mutuals who i love so much and that's why I'm still here#it's also the only social media i use currently#but it does really hurt when i put a lot of thought into something like spending hours making a funny meme or a thoughtful post#just to find out that the only people who find them interesting is my extremely small circle on here if anyone at all#it's so dumb i shouldn't be feeling like this over fucking numbers....it's not even real#i find a little bit of (petty) solace in the fact that there are people on here who are loudly and repeatedly saying way more embarrassing#shit than I've ever said#but even then when i know someone is absolutely wrong it makes me feel nervous like what if im the next person to fuck up that bad#and i find out through public ridicule#well that actually kinda did happen on here once but not on that scale#last year i sent someone something i thought was funny and they sent back an 'ok'#and then immediately made a huge long post about how you shouldn't talk to strangers like you're already friends#called it parasocial behavior...got tens of thousands of notes and i knew it was about me...#i wholeheartedly agree some people go too far with parasocial behavior but i never fully understood what part of what i said/did was wrong#and i went back to feeling like the kid who never found out they were doing something wrong until they heard that they got made fun of#i don't even attempt to make new friends on my own on here anymore because i'm terrified of that happening again#almost all of the people I've become friends with on here came to me first and i love and appreciate them for that#but even then i feel too nervous to socialize that often bc i never find out/realize that i fuck up until later on
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fisherrprince · 5 months ago
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I’ve turned a complete 180 on chatfics. they’re delightful actually
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hellscap3 · 11 months ago
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I wish I had 12 extra hours a day for more drawing. I'm not being greedy just half a day come on 🥺🥺🥺🥺
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violentdevotion · 2 years ago
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I showed my mum a pictured of kendall looking down from the roof in season 2 and she agreed to watch succession with me 💪💪💪
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deliciousmicroplastics · 9 months ago
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the thing about writing is that seven days a week i might feel like a horrible unsolvable problem but if i can write or draw or even think about some ocs to be horrible unsolvable problems instead of ruminating on my own bullshit it's juuuuuust a bit easier to keep going
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korattata · 1 year ago
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nikkento-writes · 6 months ago
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Babysitter - Part 1
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Pairing: dad!Toji x babysitter!reader
Rating: Explicit – MINORS DO NOT INTERACT
Word Count: ~1.7k
cw: age gap (reader is 21, Toji is in his 30s), language, cheating, smut – PIV sex (doggy style), breeding kink, daddy kink
Summary: You're hired to babysit little Megumi for the summer, but you end up taking care of his father, Toji, as well.
Author’s Notes: This is repost from my old blog! I initially got this as a request and it became my first Toji fic ever, and certainly not my last lol. I'm posting this again because I actually wrote a Part 2, check it out! Thanks for reading! Divider credit to @/fic-dumpster.
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You stand in front of a quaint house, checking your watch for the time. It’s been almost ten minutes now since you knocked, no answer. You gave the number from the listing a call, still nothing. Rolling your eyes, you take a seat on the steps leading to the door, waiting.
It’s the summer before you head back to university for your senior year. In an attempt to make some extra cash, you took a job as a babysitter through local ads in the paper. The first two clients were completely normal; this one is already leaving a bad taste in your mouth. 
Fifteen minutes have passed. You try once more, pounding on the door with your fist as loud as you can. Heel turned, ready to leave, it suddenly swings open, revealing a muscular man with black hair, glaring at you. “What the fuck do you want?” 
You step back, startled by his intimidating presence. Stuttering, you answer, “I’m the babysitter.”
He continues to stare at you, eyes following your body up and down, studying it. “Babysitter?”
Before you can explain any further, you hear a car rolling into the driveway. A woman in professional attire steps out quickly. “I’m so sorry I’m late!” She rushes towards you, holding her hand out to shake yours. “We spoke on the phone. I got stuck in traffic, I’m so sorry.”
You smile at her. “It’s okay.”
She faces the man, expression switching from cheery to dreary in an instant. “Toji, where is Megumi?”
He scratches his head. “Huh?”
“Megumi. Our child.”
He sighs. “Right. Uh, I’ll go get him.” 
While he’s gone, the woman pulls you aside, speaking in a hushed voice. “That’s Toji, my husband and Megumi’s father. Unfortunately, he’s a complete deadbeat. That’s why I want to hire you. I started my new job and I need someone to take care of Megumi while I’m gone during the day.”
She swallows hard, blinking to fight off oncoming tears. “I have no one. I’ve been shunned by my family, my husband doesn’t give a shit about ours, and I’m all alone trying to give Megumi a good life. I know this is a lot to ask, but I’m desperate. This is just until I can save enough money to hire a full-time nanny.”
She grips onto your wrist with both her hands, begging for help. Truthfully, it’s a lot to unravel, more drama than you anticipated. But the anguish in her eyes tugs at your heartstrings. Plus, knowing it’s temporary doesn’t make it seem so difficult. How bad can it be? “Okay. I’ll do it.”
Relief washes over her. “Oh thank god. Thank you. Thank you. Let’s go inside and I can give you a tour.” She leads you through the entrance, removing her shoes as you follow her. “Oh, and one more thing.”
“Sure.”
“Toji is home most of the day, but he’s always couped up in his room, doing god knows what. Just leave a meal or two outside his door twice a day. That should be enough.”
“Huh?!” 
She glances at you with a nervous smile on her face. “Yeah. I told you, he’s good for nothing.”
You don’t respond while you maneuver through the house, barely paying attention while she shows you around. It almost sounds like you’ll be babysitting two children…
~~~
The first two weeks of your new job go by smoothly. Megumi is an adorable baby; he’s almost two-years-old with hair as black as his father’s. While he never really smiles, he doesn’t cry either, expression usually stern, unless he needs a diaper change. He’s self-sufficient, always immersed by his own toys until it’s time to eat. Overall, he’s easy. 
Toji, on the other hand, is another story. 
You follow his wife’s instructions, leaving two meals outside his door, breakfast and lunch. And this asshole has the audacity to critique it! The bread wasn’t toasted enough. The eggs were too runny. There wasn’t enough seasoning on the meat. All this criticism while each plate is licked clean, not a crumb to spot. He’s never even uttered a simple thank you. 
But what he lacks in social skills or personality, he makes up for in his physique. In between meals, he works out in the living room lifting weights, doing push-ups, sit-ups, and pull-ups at the frame of the door. It lasts for over an hour, and by the end of it, he’s shirtless, dripping with sweat. You’ve done everything in your power to avoid staring but it doesn’t prevent your mind from conjuring all types of lewd thoughts about him. You’re ashamed to admit that he is physically attractive, only because everything else about him is utter trash. Still, it doesn’t hurt to look, right?
On the third week, there’s a shift in energy between you two. When he isn’t working out or going out to meet with his sketchy friends, he’s usually couped up in his bedroom, ignoring you and Megumi. This morning, he actually joins you in the kitchen. You stare blankly at him, stunned by his sudden appearance. Megumi is unfazed by his father as he tries to pull your wrist towards him to get a spoonful of mushed up peas. 
When he catches you, Toji glares. “What?”
“Um, nothing. Just surprised to see you here.” You clear your throat, focusing back on the baby. 
He rolls his eyes. “This is my house. I can do whatever I want.”
“Yes, of course. Sir.”
For some reason, this triggers him. He stands up abruptly, stepping to you, leaning his face towards yours. The scar on the corner of his lip twitches when he gives you a wicked grin. “That’s right. I’m in charge here.”
You flinch from him, scared, maybe even slightly aroused. He’s intense, that’s for sure. But part of you finds it exhilarating to be in his presence. 
Megumi whines for more food, to which Toji grabs the utensil from your hands to start feeding him. “Damn kid, he’s hungry all the fucking time.”
You sit up in your seat, regaining your composure. “You shouldn’t curse in front of children.”
He faces you, chuckling. “Curse? Seriously? What are you, five?”
You cross your arms, answering, “I’m twenty-one.”
“Interesting.” There’s that naughty smirk again, as if he’s thinking something obscene in that twisted head of his. And while you should be turned off, you’re not. You squeeze your legs together, pussy throbbing between your thighs. And of course, he notices this. He must, because he leans forward, lips grazing your ear, whispering, “Come by my room whenever Megumi is taking his nap. That’s an order.”
~~~
This is bad. Very, very bad. 
You're supposed to be better than this. Clearly, you aren’t, because you’re currently getting railed by your employer’s husband while his child sleeps peacefully in the next room.
“Fuck, this pussy is tight,” he groans, pumping his thick cock in and out of you. You’re bent over the edge of the bed, his hips smacking against your ass as he thrusts into you. He’s got a tight grip on your hips, nails digging into your flesh, pounding away at your greedy pussy, absolutely drenched with arousal and lube. Your face is sticky with perspiration, pillow soaked with sweat and drool. It’s a fucking mess, but it doesn’t matter, because all you can think about is Toji fucking you until you’re seeing stars. Until your head is empty and nothing but his fat cock is occupying your thoughts.
“God, you’re squeezing me so fucking hard, princess. You gonna come again?”
You nod erratically, reaching your fingers to your clit. He smacks it away, doing it himself, his thumb flicking against your swollen bud. “Fucking come on my cock then. Make it nice and creamy for me, got it?”
His cock is buried deep inside you, hitting your sweet spot over and over until you unravel, gushing around him once more. You’ve lost count on how many orgasms you’ve had in this short amount of time. 
After your climax, he doesn’t pull out, fucking you even rougher. Your body is pliant around him, yielding to his every touch like putty. You’ve lost control of yourself, completely enraptured in the intense pleasure he surrounds you with. 
He leans forward, chest pressed to your back, lips brushed to your ear. “I’m gonna knock you up. Give Megumi a little brother or sister. Would you like that?” He’s crazy. Completely unhinged. Absolutely fucking psycho. 
“Fuck yes, I want that,” you moan. “Give it to me, daddy. Breed me.” 
And apparently, so are you. 
“Oh fuck yeah, take my fucking cum then,” he growls. The bed creaks violently below you, his backshots brutal and frantic now, cock desperate for release. “I’m gonna get you fucking pregnant. Make you mine.”
He shoots his hot load inside you, stuffing you full of his cum. He doesn’t stop until he’s fucked it deeper into your pussy, watching with that sexy look on his face as his creamy cum leaks out of your slit.
Lifting you up to lay comfortably on the bed, he rolls beside you, kissing you sloppily until Megumi’s whimpers blare through the baby monitor, indicating that he’s awake. Toji laughs, smacking your ass as you crawl over him to return to your real job. 
~~~
You spend the remainder of your summer employed at the Fushiguro household until you have to go back to school. You and Toji continue to fuck each other silly every day that you’re working. 
The day before you leave for college, you say your goodbyes to the family. Megumi’s mom, who remains blissfully unaware of your sins, hugs you tightly. “Thank you so much for all your help. I’ve finally saved enough money to afford a full-time nanny, so we’ll be fine.” 
“It was my pleasure. I had a lot of fun. With Megumi,” you clarify, avoiding Toji’s gaze as he watches from the kitchen. 
“Seriously. You’re a good person. I hope you know that.” She smiles, truly grateful. “And thank you for taking care of my good for nothing husband too.”
As the guilt of this dirty, filthy secret eats away at you, Toji stares at you from across the room, smirking. 
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guzhufuren · 10 months ago
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A Guide to Some of the Best Queer Asian Shows
The guide includes a show’s basic summary; main genres/tropes/themes and official streaming links (additional info on how to watch at the end of this post)! You can find some content warnings in the reply section of this post. Shows are listed by countries, numbered by the order I recommend watching in, not by rating. All shows have happy endings unless specified otherwise. The list will hopefully be updated regularly (last updated on 04/04/2024, 98 queer shows in total).
Most shows are about mlm, I specify with coloured notes those that are focused on wlw, polyamory, aromantism/asexuality, etc.
Tumblr does not allow large texts or more than 30 images per post at the moment, so you can click on every country’s list to expand them and view them fully in a separate post. You can access this guide in a google doc here.
Thailand 🇹🇭 (full list here)
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1. KinnPorsche mafia boss/bodyguard; action; kidnapper/kidnapee side couple
Kinn, a son of a prominent mafia head, is ambushed by an enemy, and meets Porsche, a bartender who comes to his rescue for a price, thus beginning their reluctant relationship as boss and bodyguard, which soon turns into something more.
iQIYI
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2. Bed Friend friends with benefits; office setting; trauma
King and Uea work in the same office. After a company outing ends in a drunken hook-up between them, Uea and King agree to keep seeing each other on a strictly physical basis. With no strings attached, will these two be able to keep things between them simple and carefree or will their emotions eventually get the better of them?
Uncut 18+ on iQIYI or GagaOOLala or cut on YouTube
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3. The Sign reincarnated lovers; fantasy; thai mythology; police
The story of the love between Phaya and Tharn who used to be mythological creatures Naga and Garuda in their past lives, and were forced apart. But fate intervened, and two men were reincarnated in new bodies. Now, they work together as partners in the Special Investigations Unit to uncover violent crimes and supernatural mysteries while their love is tested by mystical forces and past enemies.
YouTube
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4. I Feel You Linger In The Air period drama; time travel; bittersweet
Jom, an architect overseeing the renovation of a rundown villa, continuously dreams of a man he's never met. When a twist of fate transports Jom to Chiang Mai in the 1920s, he assumes the role of a servant to the affluent young master Yai, the mysterious man from his dreams.
GagaOOLala or YouTube
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5. You're My Sky sports; university setting; coming of age
Thorn, a young basketball player follows his senior Fah to university as a result of the promise they’d made — to become national basketball champions. However, to his dismay, he finds that Fah has already given up on basketball. --- Aai has to work in pairs throughout the semester with San, 1 year footballer; in order to receive a scholarship to study in Japan, Ai must be willing to do everything to get an A grade. --- Track running requires the compatibility of the team members to be very high. Vee, who became the new racquet 4, has to speed up training to fit in with the team as quickly as possible, especially with Dome, spending extra time together to train. Is love actually a major obstacle on the path of being an athlete?
Viki
> more tv shows from Thailand
GMMTV Thailand 🇹🇭 (full list here)
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1. My School President high school setting; secret crush; school president/rebel musician
Gun is the head of his high school music club. Tinn is a school president and Gun's long-term rival. The Principal wants to disband some of the school’s “useless” after-school clubs, especially the music club. Per school rules, the student council president is the one who has the power to dissolve clubs. Gun is now at Tinn’s mercy, so he attempts to do whatever he can to persuade his rival not to cancel the music club. Little does he know, Tinn actually has a secret crush on him. Could romance brew as Gun makes a desperate attempt to secure the future of his band?
Viki (MSP) & YouTube (Our Skyy special 33-40) & YouTube (special)
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2. Moonlight Chicken adult romance; age gap; deaf character
Jim is an ordinary guy running a chicken rice diner. One night, he meets Wen when he stays past closing drunk. Brought together by fate that night, intangible feelings arise. Neither can stop thinking about the other despite Jim's efforts to remain unattached. Jim also takes care of his nephew Li Ming, who is falling in love with Heart, a deaf teenager who is practically kept under house arrest by his affluent parents.
YouTube
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3. Not Me revolution; freedom fighters; secret twins
When his twin Black is viciously attacked and subsequently left hospitalised in unconsciousness, White is unable to endure the harm done to his brother in silence. He learns Black was a part of a gang of anti-capitalist freedom fighters, and it was one of them who betrayed him. White disguises himself as Black to discover which one of them betrayed him and put him in a coma.
YouTube
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4. 23.5 wlw; high school setting; secret admirer
Ongsa moves to a new school and meets Sun, a cute popular girl who she immediately falls for. However, she decides to approach Sun in instagram dms under the pseudonym Earth, leading Sun to believe she's talking to a guy. But Ongsa does not want to lose the opportunity to talk to Sun, so she decides to keep the fact that she is a girl a secret and continue talking as Earth.
YouTube
> more tv shows from GMMTV Thailand
Japan 🇯🇵 (full list here)
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1. Cherry Magic!   mind reading; secret crush; office setting
By still being a vіrgin at 30, Adachi gains a magical power – the ability to read other people's minds by touching them. At first, he’s overwhelmed by his new ability, and it’s not proving to be helpful to him. But that all changes when he accidentally touches their office’s most perfect guy Kurosawa, who he learns has romantic feelings for him.
WeTV (Cherry Magic) & no international streaming of Cherry Magic The Movie is available to my knowledge, so watch on bilibili or KissKH
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2. Kieta Hatsukoi (My Love Mix-Up!)   misunderstanding; high school setting
Aoki has a crush on Hashimoto, the girl in the seat next to him in class. But he despairs when he borrows her eraser and sees she's written the name of another boy — Ida — on it. To make matters more confusing, Ida sees Aoki holding that very eraser and thinks Aoki has a crush on him!
Viki
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3. Our Dining Table food; child character
Salaryman Yutaka finds it difficult to share meals with other people. However, his life starts to change when one day, his cooking attracts the attention of a young boy named Tane and his older brother Minoru. The two brothers are impressed by Yutaka's cooking skill and invite him to their house to cook together. Yutaka's dreary life begins to change, and soon he finds himself looking forward to the meals he shares with the Ueda siblings together, as well as developing a taste for romantic feelings.
GagaOOLala
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4. She Loves to Cook and She Loves to Eat wlw; neighbours; self-discovery; food
Nomoto loves to cook, but tends to make too much food and has no one to share it with. Luckily for her, turns out her neighbor Kasuga has a big enough appetite for the both of them.
No international streaming available, translated to english by Furritsubs, S1 & S2, watching instructions provided, please support translator on kofi.
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5. Takara-kun to Amagi-kun high school setting; relationship exploration
Takara is a good-looking popular guy in class, while Amagi is a simple but bright and pure fellow classmate. The two begin to date in secret after Amagi's blurted out confession.
Viki or GagaOOLala
> more tv shows from Japan
China 🇨🇳 (full list here)
Most chinese shows are adapted from explicitly queer novels, the shows are undeniably and obviously queer, but nevertheless the queer romance part is censured. The only exception is number 4 on the list, it is not censored.
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1. The Untamed period drama; fantasy
An epic fantasy led by a problem child who comes back from the dead 16 years later in order to fix the broken world he left behind — and finally unite with his soulmate.
YouTube
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2. Word of Honor period drama; fantasy
The leader of assassin organisation Zhou Zishu quits his position in pursuit of freedom with drastic measures. In his travels, he meets Wen Kexing, the leader of Ghost Valley who wants nothing but revenge. The two become entangled in various machinations within the martial arts world, and eventually become soulmates instrumental in each other's redemption.
YouTube & Special Episode on Tumblr or DailyMotion
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3. Couple of Mirrors wlw; period drama; socialite/assassin
You Yi is a kind-hearted socialite and a successful author. Her perfect life is turned upside-down when she discovers a betrayal by the two most trusted people in her life. With no one left to turn to, she finds refuge in the friendship and support of Yan Wei, a lonely female killer disguised as the owner of a photo studio.
YouTube. the show doesn’t have a happy ending, but it can be a happy ending for you if you stop watching at episode 12 timestamp 28:02.
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4. Stay With Me enemies to lovers; high school setting; unconventional families; slow burn
Su Yu is a high school student who lives with his single poor father. Su Yu gets a new classmate Wu Bi. The two clash right from the start, and after getting off on the wrong foot, their explosive relationship takes a turn.
YouTube or GagaOOLala. the show doesn’t have a happy ending, but it can be a happy ending for you if you stop watching at episode 24 timestamp 05:00. OR watch the full thing and look at this post after
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5. The Spirealm inside of a video game; mystery; fantasy; horror-ish; hopeful ending
A game designer Lin Qiushi is transported inside of a game he recently played, and now he must go through 12 horrifying survivor game doors to survive in the real world. Inside his first door he meets Ruan Nanzhu, a mysterious man who offers him to team up.
The show was taken down from streaming, download files here and subtitles here.
Various WLW mini web-dramas here.
Various WLW short films here.
South Korea 🇰🇷 (full list here)
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1. Love for Love's Sake inside of a video game; high school setting; healing
At the age of 29 Tae Myungha finds himself transported into a fictional video game, and now 19 years old, he meets Cha Yeowoon, who is in the darkest moment of his life. And a translucent window appears where he receives a mission — to make Cha Yeowoon happy.
iQIYI (better subtitles) or GagaOOLala
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2. Semantic Error enemies to lovers; university setting
A serious programmer and a rebellious artist clash over a school project. Their animosity keeps escalating to new extremes, defined by petty pranks and feisty arguments.
Viki
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3. Love Tractor farm setting; farmer/city musician
Sunyeol, a city man with zero ability to survive in the countryside, comes to his grandfather's rural home. In front of him appears Yechan, a passionate and kind young farmer. While learning about rural life and assisting with farming tasks, Sunyeol gradually finds himself drawn to Yechan's warm and straightforward nature, while Yechan helplessly falls for Sunyeol.
iQIYI
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4. Our Dating Sim high school friends to lovers; office setting
After 7 years, Lee Wan meets his first love, Shin Kitae, in a gaming company. When they were best friends in high school, Lee Wan was in love with Kitae. But he ran away and disappeared after confessing his feelings to Kitae after graduation. When the two of them begin working on a new dating simulation game and get more immersed in the project, old feelings are rekindled.
Viki or GagaOOLala
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5. She Makes My Heart Flutter wlw; bar setting; niece and aunt dynamic
The extroverted Gang Seol is hired by her aunt Jung at her only-women bar. Even though they are both lesbians, they seem to be worlds apart and have very different love stories.
YouTube
> more tv shows from South Korea
Taiwan 🇹🇼 (full list here)
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1. History3: Trapped mafia boss/policeman
The story of a police officer who becomes trapped in the underworld, as he develops feelings for a gang leader.
YouTube or Viki
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2. Kiseki: Dear to Me mafia; age gap
Bai Zongyi, an exemplary high school student with dreams of becoming a doctor, is one day unexpectedly drawn into the world of a charismatic and mischievous gangster Fan Zerui, who blackmails him into taking him in and treating his wounds. Just as their love story begins to unfold, Fan Ze Rui's criminal life catches up with him. On the other hand, Chen Yi and Ai Di are two orphans who grew up in the gang together. Ai Di has always loved Chen Yi, but Chen Yi only notices their boss.
Viki or GagaOOLala or YouTube
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3. My Tooth Your Love dentist/chef; trauma healing
Bai Lang is a successful bistro owner with an severe fear of visiting the dentist... until a toothache forces him to come face to face with the handsome yet cold dentist Jin Xunan.
Viki
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4. Anti Reset android/human
When Chu Yi Ping, an emotionless man, dislocates his hand in an accident at school, his uncle gives him Ever 9 as a caretaker, an experimental intelligent robot that his company is secretly testing.
Viki or iQIYI or GagaOOLala
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5. History2: Crossing the Line sports; high school setting
When an injury sidelines a high school senior from the volleyball team, he develops feelings for a recruit.
YouTube or Viki
> more tv shows from Taiwan
Philippines 🇵🇭
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1. Sleep With Me wlw; radio; disabled character in a wheelchair
A science textbook writer with a sleep disorder meets a wheelchair-using radio host who runs the midnight shift. This chance encounter at the radio station quickly sparks their interest in each other.
GagaOOLala
---
You can watch many shows for free on YouTube, and watch others on the streaming websites by setting VPN to one of the countries in the list. In other cases I recommend paying for subscriptions to show appreciation and support of content in order to get more of it in the future, but if you can’t, watch on KissKH (better quality), Dramacool or get files from MkvDrama. Enjoy!  🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️
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opencommunion · 1 year ago
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[ID: instagram post from @.GazaMedicVoices. Text over the gridded numbered map of Gaza released by the IOF reads: “We are no longer in Rafah, we are in ‘block XX.’ The reality is uglier than anyone can imagine because what is happening to us has never happened before.” - Surgeon displaced to south of Gaza, 1/12/23. The post caption reads: Israel has started using a numbered grid system for evacuation warnings, accessed via a QR code on leaflets dropped from the sky and via social media. This has led to terror and confusion as people struggle to find refuge from the heavy bombardment. /end ID]
These “evacuation zones” are extermination zones. The IOF has 0 intention of letting anyone move freely in Gaza. They shoot people who try to move to the places they’re told to evacuate to, and many people can’t move at all because everything around them is under constant bombardment. Most Gazans don’t have internet to view these “evacuation notices” in the first place, because the IOF bombed Gaza’s communications infrastructure. This map is another weak attempt to convince the world that they’re trying to “minimize casualties,” but like most Zionist propaganda, it’s just more evidence of their atrocities. They have literally divided Gaza into death chambers.
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carolinanadeau · 1 year ago
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these days this blog has 4 main modes:
fixation on obscure special interests
aesthetic-y romantic-y cutesy stuff (often this is a disguised fixation on special interests / search for writing inspiration)
Taylor Swift
meme shit
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nebulaafterdark · 7 months ago
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The Rats (Pt. 3)
Aegon ii x Velaryon(Strong)! Reader
Summary: Aegon attempts to make peace with Rhaenyra after being forced to usurp her throne. Lucerys’ death complicates things.
18+ ONLY, MDNI. Targcest, smut, angst, violence. S2 SPOILERS
Part 1 | Part 2
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“With free reign of King’s Landing, Aemond will focus his attention on the occupation of bast-” Aegon’s face flushes bright red. “Harrenhal.” He corrects himself, “and the extermination of house Strong.”
“What did you call it?” Daemon arches a brow.
“Harrenhal,” Aegon repeats.
“Before that,” Daemon prods.
Aegon sighs, looking to his wife.
“Bastardhal.” Y/N rolls her eyes.
“My brother’s term of endearment.” He explains, “a slip of the tongue.”
“Mmm,” Daemon hums. “Perhaps allegiance to your brother runs deeper than you let on.”
“I have left my siblings and abandoned my post to be here. I remain loyal to Rhaenyra’s claim and her line of succession. What else would you have me do?” Aegon scoffs.
“There are a number of things.”
“If you refuse to believe that Aegon is loyal to our queen, believe that he is loyal to me and I am loyal to my mother.” Y/N takes a protective step in front of her husband.
Daemon’s jaw ticks, frustrated and teetering near sanity’s edge. “You then, are responsible for his indiscretions.”
“I take full responsibility.” Y/N agrees, “he is here for me.”
“Perhaps he might further demonstrate his loyalty.”
“And how, do you suggest, I do that?” Aegon wonders.
“Deliver us your brother’s head on a platter.” Daemon sneers.
“Mother!”
“Am I wrong, Rhaenyra?” Daemon scoffs.
“That is enough!” The Queen slams her fist against the table. “Thank you, Aegon for the information you provided. We will coordinate with our army and send reinforcements to Harrenhal. We will send word to Cregan Stark-”
“By raven?”
“However I see fit, Daemon. Stay your hand.” Rhaenyra snaps. “You are all excused.”
Aegon is out the door just as swiftly.
Y/N flinches as it slams behind him.
Jacaerys remains stoic in the corner, saying nothing for a long while as his mother and step father begin bickering. “Sister,” he nods toward the hallway.
Y/N returns the gesture, following him out past the royal guards. “The nerve of him.” She is fuming as they begin strolling the grounds.
“That is Daemon.” Jacaerys breathes. “Pay him no mind.”
“It’s not as if I don’t want Aemond’s head. Luce is our brother, for the gods’ sake.”
Jace swallows, mouth set in a firm line. “He was our brother.”
Was…is he not anymore?
“In these dealings with Aemond, you must remember that killing him will not bring Luce back.”
“It would be even.”
“A son for a son was also even.” Her brother reminds her. “Your grievance with it hath brought you here.”
“I should have allowed the murder of a child?”
“I did not say that.”
“Then what are you saying?”
“What is even is not always right, I expect you know that by now.”
“Indeed.”
“Ravens will take too long.” Jacaerys laments, “but mother will not let us deliver messages anymore. It is a shame that our safety comes at the expense of other’s.”
Y/N draws in a steadying breath. “Pity.” She turns away, in the direction of her chambers. Aegon is waiting for her there, sipping from a pitcher of wine. “Did they not give you a cup, my darling?”
“Hmm,” Aegon hums into the container, “of course.” He lowers the pitcher from his mouth, “but this is faster.”
The princess puts a hand to her head.
“I am not a dog that’s been kicked, do not look at me that way. As if I am weak.”
“I love you and you are hurting.” Y/N sighs, “I do not know how else to look at you.”
Aegon mulls this over for a moment. “I did not mean to call it bastardhal.”
“I know that.”
“You are not a bastard.” He presses on, “I am sorry for ever calling you one.”
“You are forgiven.” It is nothing more than a word. It cannot harm her anymore.
“If no house would claim you, then I would.”
Y/N gives him a sad smile, “thank you, Aegon.”
“You think I jest? Or does it simply mean nothing coming from me?”
“It means everything coming from you,” Y/N takes a step toward him. “Forgive me if I have made it seem-”
“No,” Aegon shakes his head, “forgive me. I am lost in this. I mustn’t take my frustration out on you.”
Y/N cups his face in her hands. “If you are loved by no one, know you are loved by me.“
“Without you I have nothing.” He reaches a shaky hand out, stroking her hair, reverently. “I am nothing.”
She draws back, searching his eyes. “That is not true.”
“If you ask me to slay my brother, I will do it.” Aegon breathes.
Y/N presses her lips together. She had not asked, Daemon did. But Aegon does not bend to Daemon’s will, only hers.
“Please do not ask.” He murmurs with wide, sad eyes.
Y/N cannot stand to see him cry. It tears at the depths of her soul. She wraps her arms around him, “I will not ask.”
Aegon clings to her. “I would do it.”
“I know, my love.” Y/N presses kisses to the side of his face. She knows his sadness, the burden of being least loved by everyone else. Some part of him will always seek to win her approval, her affection… her love.
He is pawing at her then, at the laces of her dress. He does not know how to comfort her, nor himself. He knows how to bring pleasure so blinding it nearly drowns out the pain.
Y/N helps him remove his clothes, wrapping him up in her arms. “I love you.”
“As I love you.” He’s stumbling backwards then, hovering over her on the bed. Easing his cock into her.
She sighs, losing herself in the gentle rocking of his hips. There is no haste to reach their peak, taking what little comfort they can from each other.
It is not until his thumbs skate over her cheeks that Y/N realizes she is crying. Even here, on their marriage bed, there is no end to suffering. Only an end to loneliness.
————————————————————————
Y/N waits until Aegon is sleeping soundly to clamber from the warmth of his arms and dawn her riding gear. Dragonstone is quiet as she makes her way down to the dragon pit. Stormborn is nestled in beside Sunfyre, her light blue scales complement the golden hue of her companion.
“Where are you off to at this hour, your grace?” One of the keepers asks.
“I’m going to take Stormborn out for a bit of fresh air. The moon is beautiful this evening, don’t you agree?” Y/N smiles, tucking a bit of loose hair behind her ear.
“Indeed, Princess.” He eyes the sword, sheathed at her back.
“This is only a precaution,” Y/N lies, “we can never be too careful in these times.”
He nods, “I will saddle her.”
“Thank you, Marcelo.” Y/N nods, tugging on her riding gloves as she waits. Tapping at her wedding band, beneath the cool fabric.
“She is ready, your grace.”
“Thank you, again.” She says, climbing up onto Stormborn’s saddle.
“It is my great honor.” The man smiles, watching in wonder as the princess sets off across the sea.
Only a few torches are lit at the entrance of Harrenhal.
Y/N lands near the stone walkway, striding up to the tall hooded figure and ripping back his cloak.
Aemond turns to his assailant. “Y/N?”
“Take out your sword.” She demands.
“Lucerys death was a tragic mistake, a lapse in judgment I do not care to repeat.”
“I will not kill you with your back to me, I am no coward. You will face me, take out your sword.”
“For the sake of the gods, Y/N,” Aemond growls. “Do you aim so desperately to break my brother’s heart?”
“I will not allow the slaughter of innocent people. This ends here.”
“A brother for a brother it will be then, not a son for a son.” Aemond reluctantly withdraws his weapon.
Y/N charges him, in a blind rage, their blades meet, clanking together.
“You make a better sparring partner than most.” He draws his sword away, narrowly dodging her next attack.
“This is not a children’s game, I want your head!”
Aemond purrs, “you must earn it then.”
She sees red, swinging at him again, until his blade slices across her side and she has cut deep into the flesh of his leg. Bringing the Prince to his knees, with her sword at his neck.
“Do it,” Aemond insists, “you will not get another chance.” He stares up at her blade, dripping with his blood. The fear etched into her eyes, tresses of dark hair clinging to her sweat damp skin.
In this light, each of them resemble their brother.
The end Y/N desires is so near she can taste it, rising like bile in her throat. She chokes on it. “No.” She drops her blade from his neck, covering her aching side instead. “No.”
Aemond hangs his head. “I am sorry for that business with Luce. I lost my temper that day.”
“And I lost my…” No, she cannot say it, the pain is too great.
“Let me see your wound.” Aemond insists.
In her shock, Y/N obeys.
He tears across the bottom of his cloak, knotting the material firmly around her torso. Unbothered by her hissing protest. “This will hold until you reach Dragonstone. Go to Aegon, he will tend you.”
“You must leave this place.”
“You have my word.”
“And you must leave King’s Landing.”
Aemond smirks, “where would I go?”
“Anywhere.” Y/N suggests, “take Helaena and your children. We both know, she is too kind to bear the weight of the crown and our blood. Take her away so she might be happy…and free.”
“Do you not wish to be free from the weight of the crown?”
Y/N hesitates for a long moment. “I am the crown. I am my mother’s heir, her only daughter. I cannot abandon her, she has lost too much.”
Aemond swallows, “very well. Helaena will write you. You and my brother might visit, once we’re settled.”
“Perhaps we will.” She will never forgive him for Lucerys. They will never be as they were before Storm’s End. “You are my husband’s brother and husband of my dearest friend.”
“I am also your brother’s murderer. A title that trumps all, despite your best intentions. You are good, and kind, but human all the same.”
————————————————————————
“Aegon.”
“Hmm?” He reaches for his wife, blindly, stroking a hand over her dark waves. “What have you done to your hair, darling girl?” He grumbles, “it is awfully coarse.”
Jace bats Aegon’s hands away. “My sister is gone, you buffoon. Get your clothes on.”
“Jacaerys?” Aegon springs up, covering himself with the top sheet. “What are you doing?”
“Y/N is missing. The dragon handlers informed me that she left on Stormborn nearly two hours ago. Sunfyre has been yowling ever since.”
“Alert your mother,” Aegon demands, “raise the guard. Who on earth let the heir to the throne take a dragon from the pit in the middle of the night?”
“She is a princess, not a prisoner.” Jace reminds him, “I have a hunch as to where she went.”
“Harrenhal.” Aegon begins tugging on his clothes. The little brat bedded him and snuck off; again. “She will be a prisoner upon her return. I tire of these games.”
“You mustn’t be so harsh, my sister would go to the ends of the earth for you.”
“Yet she will not stay with me.” Aegon steps into his boots. “Surely she loves me so dearly that she flees at every opportunity.”
“Do not see it that way.” Jace sighs.
“I have no other way to see it.” Their chamber door swings open, revealing the woman in question.
“Aegon,” Y/N chokes. The blinding rush of battle is gone, leaving only her pain.
“Leave us,” Aegon waves a dismissive hand at his nephew.
“Y/N,” Jacaerys looks to his sister instead.
“I am well, brother.”
“You are bleeding.”
Y/N glances down at her wound, “perhaps you might go quietly to the maester and request milk of the poppy?”
“The maester should tend you,” he argues.
“Aegon will tend me, tis but a scrape.” Y/N insists.
Her brother squares his shoulders. “Very well, I will be back.”
“Thank you, brother.” Y/N forces a smile as Jace exits the door.
“What happened?” Aegon demands, squinting into the dim light as his wife stands before him, in her riding gear.
“I could not do it.” Y/N curses her own weakness. “I went to Aemond, I stopped him from taking Harrenhal and I let him go.”
Aegon shifts her garments aside to reveal the damage. A long bleeding gash, beneath her ribs. “Aemond did this to you?” He sits her down on the foot stool, pacing in the small space before it.
“We dueled,” Y/N admits. “I made my mark on him as well.”
“Gods be good.” Aegon breathes.
“If Daemon catches word of this-”
“You are injured. That is where my interests lie, not in the folly of men.” Aegon seethes.
“He has already condoned the murder of children. Helaena’s children, of all people. What will he do if he hears of this?”
Aegon passes a hand over his face. “Surely we cannot leave the wound open like that, it will fester.”
“I know,” Y/N nods. “We must seal it up, with a heated blade. We can do it here, no one need know.” She reaches for his cup on the dresser, chugging the foul liquid down for some relief.
“You’re asking me to…” his eyes dart to his dagger, abandoned near his boots. “No.”
“Aegon.”
“I can’t.”
“It will be quick,” she reasons. “It will scar, but it is on my side, you will not look upon it often.”
“That is what you’re concerned with,” Aegon snaps, “of all things, you think I care about the scar it will leave? That I might frown upon an imperfection?”
“I-”
“You are maddening.”
“I am sorry. I do not wish to fight.”
“It is unavoidable from what I’ve heard. Marriage causes strife and disagreements.”
“Not ours,” Y/N insists, “you are the only person who understands me.”
“I do not understand why you would put yourself in danger.”
“For you.” Y/N tells him. “So you would not have to choose between your wife and your brother.”
“I would choose you, imbecile.”
Y/N bares her teeth. “I couldn’t let you.”
“Why?”
“Because you are mine, Aegon! I protect what is mine.”
In the way of the dragon. And that, Aegon understands very well.
“Here it is,” Jace returns with milk of the poppy.
“Thank you,” Aegon takes the gauntlet, bringing it to his wife’s lips. “Drink all of it.” He demands.
“Is there anything more I can do?” The other man asks.
“Rest the blade of my dagger over the fire until it glows red, then bring it to me.”
Jace nods.
“First, might you find something for her to bite down on. Leather works best.” Aegon purses his lips, “bring me my belt.” One of them is still etched with her teeth markings from Laenor’s birth. He’s delivered two of their children, surely he can do this.
Jacaerys rushes to the armchair beside the bed, tugging Aegon’s belt free and placing it on the foot stool beside his sister.
Y/N curls her fingers around the harsh material. Her vision has doubled, swaying from side to side.
“Are you going to faint?” Aegon catches her face between his hands.
“I feel fine,” Y/N slurs.
Aegon taps her chin. “That is good, my dearest love. I am going to remove your shirt.” He eases the material over her head, leaving only the bindings to cover her breasts.
“The blade is ready,” Jacaerys calls, from the fire place.
“Open.” Aegon tugs at her bottom lip with his thumb until her jaw goes slack, taking the leather belt from her clenched fist and placing the strap between her teeth. “Bite.”
Y/N clamps her teeth around it.
“Good girl.”
Jacaerys approaches, handling the instrument with care.
“You will hold me around the waist, you are not to let go until I say.” Aegon instructs, waiting until she is wrapped around him in an awkward sort of hug. “There you go.” He pats her head before taking the dagger from her brother. He offers no additional warning before lying the blade flat across the expanse of her wound. The cut is a clean one, without jagged edges.
Y/N lets out a muffled cry.
“Shh,” he hushes her, holding the heat to her skin for just a moment more before tossing the dagger away. Gingerly withdrawing the belt from her teeth. Resting his forehead against hers as whimpers settle to deep breathing. “Are you alright?”
Y/N nods.
“If you dare leave me again, Gods help me, I will shackle you to my side.”
Y/N strokes a hand over the side of his face. “Yes, Aegon.”
“I do not jest.”
Part 4
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cosmos-kitty · 14 days ago
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Do you have any tips for painting with gouache? like how do you get it to stay a nice solid color over a large swath of paper? and how do you blend it so seamlessly?
Of course, here's a few pointers off the top of my head:
1. I've used gouache for this in the past so it's possible, but the flat backdrop on my latest WIP is actually acrylic! A nifty thing I've found about putting a layer of acrylic down, is that it creates a barrier once dried and essentially makes the paper waterproof. This means you can work in gouache on top without it mixing with the background, and you can wet a section and completely wipe it clean with a cloth/tissue and it won't disturb the acrylic layer underneath. It also makes the paper more resilient, and you don't get as much pilling/tearing from the moisture
To get an even wash it's mostly getting the right consistency, I add just a little water - enough that the paint is less "tacky" as you drag your brush along paper, but not so much that it's runny or translucent. It takes a couple of attempts sometimes!
2. Also for the current WIP that I posted earlier, like the vast majority of my traditional pieces, keep in mind that it's mixed media. So I assume you're referring to the blue-green gradient on the bird and wondering how I got the gouache to blend like that - it's actually colouring pencils! I'll often switch between dry and wet media, even layer them back and forth, whatever makes the most sense to get the effect I want 😁
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3. On that note, when you're working with paint, or any medium really, I can't recommend enough having a "test" sheet that you do both before and during a traditional piece. It allows you try out different medium combos, see what shade your gouache will dry into, and catch any issues before it ends up on your artwork. I often see artists being encouraged to just Bob Ross their way through a piece, the idea being that you'll just have happy little accidents that you'll naturally work into the piece - maybe, but you'll also possibly irreversibly wreck your hard work and have to start again. I don't know, I'm just a methodical person I guess, but seeing someone just directly apply something to the page when they're not sure what it's going to do makes me wince - no two art supplies are the same! All of those paints and pens have different chemical makeups, there's an unlimited number of ways what you're using could interact, good or bad.
Since it's already there, I usually reuse one of the leftover failsons from the process of making the wash background, then test everything on top of that. That way you can see exactly what shade the paint will dry on top of whatever colour the background is:
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Doesn't need to look good, nobody sees it (usually) and you can also test the thickness of your brushstrokes while you're at it.
Anyway, I hope this helps!
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bruhstories · 10 days ago
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Bet V
p.1 here & p2. here & p.3 here & p.4 here
mandatory mdni. you were not tagged in this because you are not over 18.
summary: in his attempt to break you, in-ho breaks himself pairing: hwang in-ho/the front man x civilian!reader warnings & content: age gap, masturbation, voyeurism, afab!reader, slightly detailed descriptions of reader’s background for plot purposes, red text for in-ho, purple for reader, pre 33rd squid game, canon divergent, veeeery slow burn, reader’s dad is dead w/c: 2k
a/n: this is my half-assed attempt at writing a game lol. if you would like to be tagged for the next part, please check this post! thank you for reading! please remember that if you asked to be tagged but i can’t find your age on your blog, you will NOT be tagged. there will be smut and people dying lol.
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Neolttwigi had been another success. The seesaw game eliminated 91 people, and with 97 remaining players, In-ho proceeded with tuho. He paid close attention to the masked soldiers who directed the survivors to the same place where they had previously played Red Light, Green Light, only the floor was divided by a bright blue line in the middle. The ceiling was open, letting players experience natural light for a second time in a row.
The game was awfully simple —  throwing arrows into the neck of a jar. In-ho remembered reading about that game in school, how it was played by royal families and the upper class before becoming a game for everyone, and the jar had a narrow neck, making it easy to miss the mark. He had rarely played it as a child, preferring juldarigi or squid, games he taught his younger brother.
It became a habit for him to check the cameras in his penthouse whenever you were there. It brought him a strange peace of mind knowing that Eunjoo was safe in your hands, but he couldn't, for the life of him, stop looking at the selfie you sent the day before. In-ho knew that walking into a lamppost was bullshit, but he didn't want to pressure you into telling him the truth. He needed you to trust him, to tell him willingly. 
Still, he examined the picture —  your cheek in particular — and concluded that you lied to him. In-ho took it as a triumph. He didn't win the bet just yet, there was still time for you to mess up, but the fact that you chose to not tell the truth only solidified his belief that you were the same as everyone else. In four days he would return to Seoul and win. The prize? He wasn’t sure. Perhaps just the satisfaction that he was above you.
Players entered the field, and the voice in the speaker instructed them to split into teams of two in less than thirty minutes, which was unfair to player 002, since there was an odd number of people. 002 was taken away by a guard, and the remaining 96 players grouped into pairs. While the objective was indeed simple — throw the arrows in the jar — it came with a twist. It always did. Each player was given four arrows, but one of them was blindfolded and threw the arrows while their teammate picked the jar up and tried to catch the arrow in it. Once all four arrows were thrown, the teammates switched places. If at least six out of eight arrows hit the mark, both players passed, but if one player threw four arrows and the other only two, they both died. 
The game took out fewer people than In-ho had hoped — 19 to be precise. Player 002 was alive and well, and the remaining 77 survivors returned to their chamber, where more and more beds had been removed, exposing the remaining three games on the walls — Hide and Seek, Yutnori and Ssireum. He remembered his time as a player, how he was the only one who paid attention to his surroundings and anticipated the following games. In-ho used all of his skills and knowledge as a detective and emerged as the sole survivor and winner. Did it bring his wife back? No, but it did make him feel so good when proved he earned his right to live.
Players were receiving less and less food, and from the comfort and safety of the control room, In-ho watched them slowly lose all traces of their humanity. He wondered how you would've performed in the games. Participants would have abused your kindness, and your good intentions would've gotten you killed. To make it worse, he was certain you would've sacrificed yourself to save someone else, someone you deemed worthy of winning. But in his eyes, only you deserved to live.
His phone vibrated in his pocket, and In-ho took it out to read the text from you. He knew it had to be you. Who else would text him at that time?
Hellooo, I took a look in the fridge and noticed the eggs and milk will go bad before you come back. I was wondering if I could give it to someone who needs it.
Damn it, you did it again. In-ho couldn't be sure that you actually gave the food to someone else — he had to take your word for it for now.
Of course. May I ask who you're giving it to?
Remember the family I told you about? The one I teach Korean to? The wife is pregnant and can't work. I think she's due to give birth soon, actually, and they could use all the help. Besides, it would be a shame to throw away perfectly good food :)
Don't you want it, miss? When we first met, you told me you didn't have a good financial situation.
Oh, no, no. I'll be fine. They need it more.
Very well, please give it to them.
Ah, I also remembered you left some money on your nightstand. With all due respect, Mr. Hwang, that's very irresponsible. Anyone could take it.
Were you lecturing him? Him? Cute. In-ho even chuckled at your reprimand, finding it adorably amusing. If only you knew the things he did, the people he killed. How would you react? That question was beginning to take over his mind like a maggot wriggling inside of his brain. Would you be disgusted? Would you go to the police? Would you agree with his ways of cleaning the world of its impurities? It was no different than how you cleaned his penthouse — you both got rid of trash.
You're right, miss. There is a safe hidden in my wardrobe. Please put the money there. The code is 1321.
Surely you would crack at the sight of so much money and try to take some. No one sane would miss such an opportunity. But then again, maybe you weren't sane. Maybe you just needed a little push, a little encouragement. In-ho poured himself a glass of whisky and thought about the wound on your cheek, and the night you were crying on his kitchen floor. Someone had hurt you, and he needed to find out who so he could exploit that. And then, you would break. 
He was, however, slightly conflicted, because he didn’t want to ruin you. In-ho merely wanted to make you see things eye to eye. Just like him, life had been unfair to you. And just like him, you needed to survive. Kindness wouldn't take you very far — you had to witness the cruelty of the world somehow, and the only possible way to do that was to play the game and survive it, something In-ho knew you would never do due to your values and morals. And he couldn't wait one more year to push you past your limits. He needed to think of something else, and he needed to do it fast — time was ticking and you were a project he refused to let slip through his fingers.
In-ho checked the cameras at the time you normally arrived at the penthouse, patiently waiting for you. He was pleased to see that you were in a better mood, cheerfully greeting Eunjoo as you went about with your tasks, but something was different. You appeared to be texting someone, and he never received any notifications on his phone, yet you were quite busy chatting back and forth. His stomach churned, an amalgamation of feelings bubbling and boiling in his core. Anxiety? Anger? Jealousy? 
Jealousy.
You always sent him a text upon your arrival. You always let him know that you were there, so who occupied your mind if not him? The sudden lack of the very little control he had over you made him trip in his room and lose balance, and he forcefully ripped the mask off and tossed it on the floor. 
In-ho was losing the bet he made with himself, and not in the way he had imagined.
It wasn't him who lived in your mind, but you who invaded his, and it infuriated him, because after his wife died, he refused to get attached, refused to fall in love. Luckily for him, it wasn't love that he felt for you, but an unhealthy obsession to watch you, to know your every move, to find out who hurt you and make you hurt them back. 
You performed your tasks with utmost perfection, and placed the money in his safe while ignoring the riches inside it, but you were distracted, constantly looking at your phone and half-smiling whenever it lit up. In-ho couldn't have that. 
How's Eunjoo?
Since you were so busy talking to someone, he expected you to frown at his text, to scoff and ignore it. But you did worse. You stopped folding his clothes and sat on the edge of his bed, beaming at the message on the screen.
She's alright! We had dinner and a cuddle, and now she's playing next to me. I'll send you a picture!
In-ho watched you struggle to take a photo of the cat — each time you took out your phone, Eunjoo stopped playing, so you swapped to the front camera, trying to sneak a picture. You even smoothed your hair and made yourself look presentable, and he found it quite adorable that you tried to look presentable for him.
I'm sorry you have to see my face, but she wouldn't sit still for a photo!
You were stunning. It was all In-ho could think about when he opened the photo. Your bright eyes were like a drug to him, instantly hooking him, forcing him to regain a shred of humanity.
Don't apologise, miss. You're beautiful.
There it was, the crack he so desperately sought for. You were practically hyperventilating in his bedroom, struggling to breathe, constantly rereading the words on your phone. And then he heard you talk to Eunjoo, heard you question your own sanity. But no, In-ho didn't like you. He was simply interested in breaking you, oblivious to how you were breaking him.
"Damn it. I promised Donghyun I'd go for a coffee after work tomorrow. I'm so confused now." Your distorted voice crackled through his speaker, and In-ho clenched his jaw, barely stopping himself from breaking his phone.
Who the fuck was Donghyun? And more importantly, why did he care? 
He didn't care, or at least that was what he told himself for the past few days. He didn't care. He didn't give a shit about you. He didn't-
The familiar words of Frank Sinatra's Fly Me To The Moon stopped him dead in his tracks. In-ho turned the volume up, still in disbelief that you knew the song, that you sung it in his bedroom like no one was watching you. It was impossible how similar you were to him, to how he was before life took a turn. But a song and a kind heart weren't enough to change him. It was far too late for that. The only possible outcome was for you to become like him, and he wouldn't accept anything else.
For the first time, In-ho didn't offer you privacy when you stepped into his bathroom. For the first time, he watched as you peeled off each layer of clothing, and for the first time, he saw every scar and scratch, every burn and bruise on your body, new and old, and he understood. You had already faced the realities of this cruel world, and you chose not to become vengeful. Your father died, your uncle abused you, and yet, you shined.
The unforeseen urge to protect you seeped through his veins, but not before you got your revenge. You deserved to get revenge more than anyone in the world. And if you didn't want that, he'd make you want it one way or another.
"Fuck." In-ho whispered when his cock twitched in his trousers at the sight of your bare body. So vulnerable. So weak. So perfect. 
He sat down, phone in one hand and his eyes only on you. It was pure instinct when he fisted his cock, pure instinct when your name spilled from his lips, pure instinct when he imagined you under him, wriggling and writhing, pure instinct when he came on his fingers, disgusted with himself.
Pure instinct. Nothing more.
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