#at which I get feelings of “If it isn't available anyway why not share it?”

[waterlinkedgirl]

Good evening Water! I've been meaning to ask this for a while, I was wondering if you'd care to explain what exactly is toumyu hanakoyomi? I've seen some info about it but since it's apparently fanclub exclusive there isn't much about it online.

Good evening dear anon! :D

Toumyu Honmaru Hanakoyomi is a monthly audio drama (15 ish minutes each) that releases on the toumyu premium fanclub. They each feature 4-6 swords, and are each themed around a flower, which ranges from Ookanehira picking a fight with quinces in winter to Urashima settling on irises when looking for a flower to decorate the tea table for the tea ceremony he's organising for his bros.

There will be 12 Hanakoyomi episodes total, and it's likely they'll have a CD release after they've all been released. However, for now, you can only listen to this month's Hanakoyomi episode on the fanclub website, which means some patience is likely to be needed if you want to listen to the last 6. But on the plus side, membership only costs 330 yen a month and when asked for an address, you can just put a hotel or the likes! (it's what I did lol) Imo, they're totally worth the subscription, even if you can't benefit from the other perks the fanclub subscription might give you, like access to ticket lotteries.

I'm also considering putting tls for them on my tumblr here, but it also feels like a bit of a gray zone, as while for myus you need both audio and visuals to enjoy it, for audio dramas you only really lose out on the sounds. I'm afraid people would be satisfied with just the tl and not seek out the actual CD when it becomes available ^^;

[sim-berry]

I'm Tired.

I totally get why many simblrs don't want to name and shame and want to avoid drama, but I'm not one of those simblrs. If I see some bs I'm going to call it out. I only have a few followers (who are lovely and sweet) anyway, so it's not like I'll get a crusade against me. So that's exactly what I'm gonna do, because I'm pissed right now.

I know I don't have a big blog so it's unlikely many will see this, but if you do, please reblog it. Spread the word about creators who have stolen content so that people can stop downloading their cc and supporting them.

One of my favorite creators, Toys of Dukeness, has just deleted all their poses from Patreon and stated that they are leaving the Sims community. Their poses have been STOLEN by other "creators" who have locked them behind paywalls. Keep in mind Toys gives their poses out FOR FREE and they've been STOLEN and put behind paywalls! They're making money off of shit that isn't even theirs! How disgusting is that?? And now they don't even feel welcome in the community that they've given so much to.

And it's funny because I just saw a post from the amazing @simmireen (who makes many of my favorite poses) calling out THE SAME CREATOR for stealing their poses!! Simmireen's poses are stunning and she is kind enough to give them out for free, and she's had her hard work ripped off by an early access paywaller. The same one who drove Toys out of this community: simsulani.

This is a screenshot taken from Toys of Dukeness's post (read the whole thing here) that specifically calls out two of the thieves:

If this keeps happening, more of our wonderful cc creators are going to leave simblr. And I don't blame them one bit. Why put hours, sometimes days, of work into creating content when it's just going to be stolen and profited off of by someone else?

And when those creators do eventually leave, do you know what we'll be left with? Scummy perma-paywallers and early access creators who use minority groups to make money. (As a member of the LGBT I can't tell you how fucking sick I am of seeing "Pride Month Collection- Available to the public on June 30th🥰")

We can't let that happen. We need to support and show love to the creators who allow us to have beautiful cc and amazing poses in our games. I can tell you right now my stories would be nothing without simmireen's and Toys' poses. And they aren't the only creators who have had their cc stolen. We're on here about AI stealing art all the time (which is a totally valid argument, don't get me wrong), meanwhile actual humans, fellow simmers, are stealing content right under our noses, right this moment.

I am TIRED of this. Our content creators are being driven off this site and out of the community entirely because their work is being stolen. Storytellers, including myself, have also had their storylines stolen. I once saw someone take my entire NSB Gen 2 storyline, with even the quotes being copied and pasted! If you don't have creativity, then don't make content, that's okay. What's not okay is STEALING from people who have worked hard on their craft, ESPECIALLY if you're making money off of the stuff you stole.

Again, please reblog if you can. And feel free to share some REPUTABLE creators so simmers know who to download from rather than the thieves. They're the ones who need to be driven out, not the hardworking creators. And anyone who is afraid to vent about this on main can come into my anon and rant all they want. We as a community need to stop this.

-Coco xoxo

[k-aay]

WHAT... MY GIRL?

synopsis :: when their friend confesses to liking a certain someone that they are very familiar with. but they cannot do anything since they're supposed to keep the relationship a secret. and it's someone they'll never let go no matter how close they are. so what do they do in that situation? featuring :: gojo, geto, nanami, choso, toji, sukuna (part 1/2)

☆ GOJO

As he walks over to his friend through the crowded party, he notices him staring intently somewhere. Being the nosy little brat he is, he decides to search where his eyes meet. So he traces it through his eyes, finding the "entertaining" sight his best friend has his eyes on. To his surprise, he didn't like where this was going. He was admiring you as you talked with other people, of course Gojo couldn't blame him for staring at you like that. But, he had to be sure before he did anything stupid.

"What's so interesting?" he questions, tracing his fingers over the rim of the red, plastic cup. His sudden question snaps his friend out from dazing off in you. "Oh- uh." He sighs, taking a moment to think before speaking. "I shouldn't be telling you this," Geto begins. Gojo's heart started beating faster, feeling nothing but nervousness was over him. "You know y/n, right?" Then, he feels his heart shatter. You walk towards the table with all the drinks where they were, causing the two of them to go more silent. "...Yeah?" he answers. "I think I like h-"

"Stop." You hear the sudden seriousness in your boyfriend's tone, causing you to wonder what the two of them were talking about. "What?" Geto was confused at the quick mood-switch in his best friend. "I shouldn't be telling you this but y/n and I are together." You flinch at the confession he made loudly to his best friend. He knew what he was doing and knew that he was going to get an earful from you later on.

But when it came to the idea of someone-even his best friend-being with you, he couldn't help it. "She's off-limits."

☆ GETO

For him, it was normal for his best friend to be with a different girl each week. Geto knew that he would never take any of them seriously and would end their relationship once he felt bored. Which was very often. So when he saw him attempting (key word: attempting) to flirt with his new target, he thought that it was nothing out of the ordinary. Until he noticed the beautiful and memorable figure he could never forget, the one of his own girlfriend.

It killed him that he couldn't just punch Gojo in the face for even thinking about you in that way. It wasn't just the fact that you were already taken by him, but the fact that even if you weren't, Gojo would get bored of you after a week and toss you to the curb like all the other women he played. And to Geto, you weren't just some random source for his best friend to get entertained by. You were his girlfriend. He walks up to the two of you, not even planning on the move he's going to make once he reaches you.

"Hey, what are we talking about here?" he interrupts Gojo from telling the same story he told all the other girls he's flirted with. You could see the irritation in his eyes and how his fists were clenched, physically restraining himself from making a scene. As Gojo continued blabbering, Geto wrapped his arm around your waist. "That's great, man. But you're going to have to find someone else, y/n over here isn't available right now."

"Why are you acting like this so suddenly, Suguru?" he smirks, shoving his hands into his pockets. "Because this is my girlfriend that you're flirting with right now. Fuck off."

☆ NANAMI

Nanami isn't one for getting into unreasonable trouble unless, in his opinion, the situation absolutely calls for it. He's not one to stoop so low to be jealous. He had no reason to. That was until his friend walked up to him, looking all giddy. He rolled his eyes, knowing it was going to be something stupid. But he let him share his thoughts anyways. "What?" Nanami questioned. "Hmm? Nothing," Ino spoke. "Okay," the man spoke flatly, not having the energy to pursue this further.

"Fine, I'll tell you." The shade of pink painted Ino's cheeks as he was smiling uncontrollably. It felt like he was a middle-schooler confessing to his crush. "You know that one girl," he begins. "You're going to have to be more specific. There are many women on this planet." Ino rolls his eyes, "y/n. She's so pretty!" This is when the situation called for "unreasonable trouble." He didn't know what to say, many thoughts rushed to his brain as he thought of the best response.

"I heard she had a boyfriend," he says. The sparkle in Ino's eyes flashed away. "Really!?" he yells. "Who? How do you know? Who told you?" Nanami knew he dug the hole deeper when the mountain of questions were spat at him. "Umm. I'm not sure who her boyfriend is and I heard it from one of her friends." Ino took a moment to think before he shrugged his shoulders, "Maybe her friend is lying to you. I'll just ask y/n myself."

"No!" Nanami yells suddenly. Even he was taken aback from his sudden reaction. "Damn, are you okay?" Ino flinches. "Yes, I'm okay. I'm not sure it's a good idea to ask her though." He fixes the positioning of his glasses. "Why not?" Nanami's cheeks started turning a suspicious shade of pink. "She's... in a relationship. With me. So don't ask her out."

[yinses]

amaretto mirage

pairing: [modern]gn! reader x hantengu clones (sekido, karaku, aizetsu, urogi) wc: 10k+ rating: mature (for this part) a/n: the PLAN is two, maybe three parts. then possibly some accompanying drabbles if i haven't burned myself out

[also available to read on ao3] synopsis: you, a simple student, finds yourself caught in a sensual game between a quadruplet of brothers, leading you down a path of self-discovery and forbidden desires.

"oh, aizetsu, wait for me please," you call out as you hurry to catch up to your friend. the sun beats down relentlessly, casting harsh shadows across the pavement, and the air is thick with the scent of exhaust and the sound of honking cars. you can feel beads of sweat trickling down your back, and the weight of your backpack seems to increase with every step.

as you draw closer to aizetsu, you take a moment to study him. his tall, lean frame is relaxed and unhurried, and his sky-blue eyes twinkle with a serene kind of patience that you find both calming and exhilarating. you can't help but wonder how he manages to maintain such an air of composure in the midst of the chaos that surrounds you.

with a sigh, you turn your attention back to your own worries. the never-welcomed midterm finals loom ahead, and you feel a familiar sense of panic rising within you. despite being in your fourth and final year, you still feel woefully unprepared. your scattered notes are a testament to your haphazard studying habits, and you know you'll pay for it later with a headache.

as you walk alongside aizetsu, you reflect on the years of hard work and dedication that have brought you to this point. you've managed to maintain decent enough grades, but deep down, you know that the credit isn't fully yours. in recent months, you owed a large portion to the man beside you.

you first met aizetsu during your sophomore year, but looking back on your freshman year, you couldn't recall his face as easily. his presence had been shrouded by what you knew of his brother, urogi, the school's star basketball player.

it wasn't until someone mentioned the relation between the two that aizetsu finally showed up on your radar. but that's really where the likeness ended. it was true that physically they shared the same complexion and hair, but their eyes and personalities couldn't be more different.

you remember marveling at the biological mystery of how one brother could have eyes that mimicked the sun while the other had a pair that mirrored the ocean. it made mountains more sense than the floating superstitions of demonic energy that your classmates liked to loft around. and apparently, aizetsu had two other brothers who also had differing eye colors. they were all quadruplets.

so yeah, given that anomaly, you were okay with blaming biology. but what you knew of urogi was that he was boisterous and confident, a fitting temperament to balance out his presence on the court. aizetsu, on the other hand, was best described as the opposite, which would be quite fitting if they were only twins. he was not rude per se, but decidedly introverted, keeping to himself and maintaining a low tone. most noticeably, where urogi was always boasting a bright smile, aizetsu was more solemn.

"sorry, you said you didn't have anything planned after this, right? i won't hold you up, but i wanted to get you something for your help," you say, breaking the comfortable silence.

aizetsu's face remained inscrutable, his blue eyes calculating as he spoke. "we share similar classes. it is an equal exchange."

your heart fluttered in your chest at the sound of his voice. he was always so patient with you, despite the vast gap in your intellect. aizetsu was undoubtedly a genius, while you had to work tirelessly to keep up with the coursework. you knew he could manage on his own, but he chose to help you anyway.

gratitude and admiration swelled within you, only further cementing your desire to show him your appreciation. you weren't sure why he chose to befriend you, but you treasured his company nonetheless.

"it's nothing big," you said, attempting to downplay your intentions. your meager budget didn't afford much extravagance. "we can go to the cafe on campus. we don't have to sit down or anything. just grab something on the way."

your heart raced as you offered, hoping that he wouldn't see through your poorly veiled attempt to treat him. you couldn't help but feel nervous at the prospect of him rejecting your gesture or worse yet, interpreting it as something more than just gratitude.

aizetsu's gaze bore into you, and you held your breath in anticipation.

"alright, if you insist," he finally acquiesced.

relief washed over you as you smiled gratefully, thanking him for accepting your offer. you couldn't help but feel a flutter of excitement in your chest at the thought of spending more time with him. but you pushed those feelings aside, not wanting to ruin the delicate balance of your friendship

⚘. ⚘. ⚘.

as aizetsu made the decision to sit down and order rather than grab and go, you felt a wave of nervous energy course through your body. you tried to remain composed, reminding yourself that this wasn't a date but merely a gesture of gratitude. you were pleasantly surprised that he had even agreed to come in the first place.

despite having known each other for months, you still struggled to describe your relationship with aizetsu. you were more than acquaintances, but not quite friends. your interactions were confined to the classroom and the library, but the countless hours spent studying together had brought you closer than you thought possible.

as you sat across from aizetsu, you couldn't help but fidget in your seat. the atmosphere was charged with a sense of anticipation, as if this small outing held more significance than either of you let on. you desperately hoped that this would be a step towards building a stronger friendship, one that could survive beyond graduation.

the cafe was cozy, with warm yellow lighting casting a soft glow over the wooden tables and chairs. the faint aroma of fresh coffee and baked goods wafted through the air, mingling with the chatter of other patrons. you couldn't help but feel a sense of comfort in this space, as if it were a sanctuary away from the stresses of academia.

as aizetsu ordered his drink, his eyes flicked over to you briefly before returning to the menu. you felt a flutter in your chest at the brief moment of eye contact, wondering if he was feeling the same sense of anticipation as you were.

as aizetsu's attention snaps back to you, you catch a glimpse of a camera flash and the click of a shutter from the corner of your eye. you shake your head, dismissing it as a trick of the light or your imagination. you turn your focus back to the conversation, discussing your tentative plans for the final semester and how you hope to broaden your knowledge in your major. aizetsu listens attentively, nodding and interjecting his own insights with ease.

suddenly, the serene ambiance of the cafe is shattered as a new figure emerges. when you look up, you find another version of aizetsu standing over the table. without even meeting him, you know this must be urogi, aizetsu's brother. his boisterous presence immediately fills the room, causing heads to turn and eyes to follow him. his eyes lock onto you, roving over you with unabashed interest before he snorts and pulls out a chair, sitting down uninvited.

aizetsu's brow furrows,"now is not the time, urogi. go away."

urogi simply crosses his arms, grinning as he refuses to budge. "nah, this is too good," he retorts, his eyes sparkling with mischief. the air around you suddenly becomes charged with a mix of curiosity and tension.

suddenly there is another click and flash, but this time much closer as urogi snaps a photo of your face. as the flash of the camera dies down, you can feel the heat rising to your cheeks. you wonder if urogi's laughter is directed towards you, or if he's simply amused by his own antics. you force a smile, trying to play it cool, but it's clear that he's rattled you.

he sees your expression and laughs, “don’t worry, i’m not doing anything weird with it. just sending it to my brothers. it's not often little aizetsu goes out on a date.”

aizetsu's reply is sharp,"urogi that's rude. you can't just do what you want like that." the other brother only shrugs and by the time he sets down his phone the damage is done.

the atmosphere of the cafe suddenly feels oppressive, as if the walls are closing in on you. you're acutely aware of the other customers, their eyes darting towards your table before quickly averting their gaze. the low hum of conversation seems to have evaporated, leaving only the sound of your own heartbeat pounding in your ears.

despite your discomfort, you can't help but also feel sorry for aizetsu. you never expect and act of gratitude would draw this much attention.

“it’s not a date, i just wanted to thank him for his help this semester."

urogi seems disinterested in your explanation as he taps against his phone. “yeah, aizetsu isn’t going to let just anyone sit him down for a meal.” he says it so absently but with a tone of finality that furrows your brow. 

you don't want aizetsu to get the wrong idea, or for anyone else to think that you're trying to pursue something more than friendship. but urogi seems uninterested in your explanation, preoccupied with his phone.

the firmnesss in his tone when he speaks of aizetsu only makes you more curious about the reserved genius. as the tension thickens between the brothers, you feel like an outsider looking in.

the atmosphere in the cafe shifts, the ambient noise fading into the background as the two siblings stare each other down. aizetsu's eyes are narrowed with determination, and you can sense that he's not going to back down. his brother, on the other hand, looks almost amused as he crosses his arms over his chest, tapping his foot impatiently.

you can feel the weight of the moment pressing down on you, unsure of how to proceed. you glance between the two of them, searching for a way to ease the tension. aizetsu's voice breaks the silence, clear and firm. "they're not a crush, urogi. they're a friend. this was meant to be a treat for our study efforts, and you're ruining it."

urogi's eyebrows shoot up in surprise, his grin faltering slightly. "oh? just a friend?" he says, sounding almost disappointed. "well, that's a shame. i was hoping for some juicy gossip to share with the team."

you can feel a blush creeping up your cheeks at the implication, and you wonder how aizetsu is taking all of this. he seems unperturbed, however, his expression remaining resolute. "you're not getting anything, urogi. ."

there's a moment of tense silence before urogi finally relents, settling back into his chair with a sigh. "fine, fine. i'll behave. but you owe me one, little brother."

the tension in the air begins to dissipate, and you let out a breath you didn't even realize you were holding. the cafe noise returns to the foreground, and you take a sip of your drink to calm your nerves. you can't help but wonder how many other hidden tensions are lurking beneath the surface of aizetsu's life.

as the silence drags on, you begin to feel restless. you shift in your seat, trying to find a way to diffuse the tension. your eyes dart back and forth between the two brothers, unsure of what to say. finally, you clear your throat, hoping to break the stalemate.

"aizetsu doesn't get the chance to talk about his family often. i distract him too much with my countless questions on material," you say, hoping to shift the conversation to a more positive note. 

your laugh however, cuts off uneasily as those golden eyes settle on you. a tug of something you cant describe pulls at his lips,”a distraction, i’m sure.” he studies you a moment longer, before reaching for the discarded menu. “well, let’s hear all about the person who has kept our brother occupied.”

aizetsu's focused gaze doesn't leave his brother, but you can sense the odd taste at the mention of his family. despite spending countless hours studying with him, you know little about his personal life. you wonder what secrets he keeps hidden behind those deep, contemplative eyes.

your attempt at lightening the mood with a joke falls flat, and you can feel the weight of the awkward silence settle over the table. your gaze falls to the table, the scratched surface now a blur beneath your fingertips as you twist them together nervously.

aizetsu's sudden attention startles you, and you raise your head to meet his gaze. the way his lips tug at the corners sends an unfamiliar jolt of something through you, but you can't put a name to it. his intense stare feels like a physical touch, sending shivers down your spine.

as he picks up his cup, you realize you've been staring too long. quickly, you avert your gaze, taking refuge in your own drink as if it can provide a shield from his penetrating gaze. aizetsu's calm tone breaks the silence, drawing your attention back to the conversation.

“given you don’t take your studies seriously, i’m not left with many options, urogi.”

urogi hums,”true. but that’s never stopped you before.”

your mind races to come up with a suitable response, but you find yourself at a loss for words. you clear your throat, hoping to regain some composure. "well, there's not much to tell. we're just friends, after all." the words sound weak even to your own ears, but they're the only ones that come to mind.

urogi snorts, leaning back in his chair. "just friends, huh? you're blushing like a bride, you know." his words are teasing, but you can feel the heat rising to your cheeks. 

the intended outing for two has evolved into something you're not entirely sure how to describe. eventually, your waiter returns to take urogi’s order, not hiding their surprise well. but urogi is more attentive to you as he quizzes you on your hometown, studies, and interests.

"so, where are you from originally?" urogi asks, leaning forward in his seat.

"i'm from a small town south of here," you reply, feeling a little uneasy under his intense gaze.

"a small town, huh? what made you want to come to this big city for school?"

"i wanted to experience something new and different," you say with a shrug.

"i can respect that," urogi says with a nod. "what's your major?"

you share without pause. 

"sounds cool. what kind of career are you hoping to have with that degree?" urogi asks, leaning back in his seat.

"i'm not really sure yet. i'm still exploring my options," you say with a smile.

meanwhile, aizetsu watches the two of you with a furrowed brow, clearly not thrilled with his brother's line of questioning. finally, he speaks up.

"urogi, can you stop talking so much for once? we came here to relax," he says pointedly.

urogi rolls his eyes but acquiesces. "fine, fine. but i have to ask. how about basketball? you're a big fan of the games right?"

aizetsu signs, but you can feel the mood finally settling to a comfortable point that you can lean into. 

and so the conversation shifts to a more neutral topic, and you're able to relax a bit and enjoy your coffee that has run lukewarm now. but in the back of your mind, you can't help but wonder what urogi's true intentions are and why he's so interested in you.

as the bizzare occassion winds down, you can't help but feel a sense of surreality as the situation has evolved into something you never imagined. you would have never expected approaching the kid in the back of the lecture room would lead to this.  

“i should get going, my shift starts soon.”

urogi whistles,” a worker and a student. busy, busy.”

as you reach for the check, your hand is halted by urogi's quick reflexes. he snatches it away with a playful grin, teasing his brother, "aizetsu, making our them pay? that's not very hospitable of you."

aizetsu simply shrugs, his expression unreadable. "i didn't want to insist and make them feel uncomfortable. they wanted to treat me, after all."

urogi's playful demeanor dissipates, and he studies his brother for a moment before suddenly slamming his own card on the table. "consider it my treat, then. you can owe me one, aizetsu."

the gesture catches you off guard, and you feel a flush rise to your cheeks. you're not used to this kind of generosity, and it makes you feel both grateful and uneasy at the same time. 

as the waiter takes the bill and disappears, you let out a small sigh of relief. the cafe, though delicious, has been a rollercoaster of emotions. urogi, the more talkative of the two, had bombarded you with questions, leaving you feeling dizzy and unsteady. aizetsu, on the other hand, had remained quiet for the most part, his blue eyes observing your every move.

as urogi scribbles a generous tip onto the bill and rises to his feet, you can't help but feel a little relieved that the intense scrutiny is over. he chats easily as he turns to his brother, his voice ringing with a certain cheerfulness that makes you wonder what kind of relationship they have.

"it was nice to meet you. i'm sure we'll be seeing each other again." urogi waves his phone in the air, the light catching the screen and casting a blue glow across his face. "sekido wants to see us. i staved him off for long enough, but we both don't want him calling."

his gaze flickers briefly to his brother, before settling back onto you. "sekido is technically the 'oldest'. a bit rougher than the rest, but," he pauses, his lips tugging up into a small smile. "i'm sure you'll get along just fine."

urogi throws an arm over aizetsu's shoulder, guiding him away as they make their exit. you watch them go, feeling more confused than when you first walked into the restaurant. what kind of family were they, to be so open and yet so guarded? you shake your head, trying to clear your thoughts, as you gather your belongings and head out.

⚘. ⚘. ⚘.

as the day waned, you hurriedly packed your bag and left campus feeling the piercing gaze of the curious onlookers behind you. the sky outside was a blend of oranges and pinks, the sun bidding a warm farewell to the day. you knew you had only a short window of time to change and make it to your night shift at the corner convenience store in your neighborhood.

at night, the store was a hub of activity, bustling with customers seeking to grab a quick snack or last-minute essentials. it was a simple job, but one that kept you afloat, paying your bills and rent. the store was always expecting customers, but not always with the most pleasant of crowds. the sound of shattering glass echoed through the aisles, causing you to wince from the front.

“oi, you’ll be paying for that, dumbass. i told you to watch where you’re going,” growled a gruff voice.

“i ain’t paying for shit,” retorted another voice, filled with equal parts anger and defiance.

you listened nervously as the argument escalated, hoping it would end before you became an issue beyond simple damages. as the two men continued to bicker, you couldn't help but wonder how your life became this - a constant struggle to make ends meet, dealing with difficult people and their petty squabbles. the thought made you feel a little weary, but you squared your shoulders and braced yourself.

the job itself wasn't glamorous, but it was a means to an end. you were grateful for the reliable income that helped manage your rent and groceries. the store owner even threw in a decent discount on some of the items, which came in handy during tight months. and being situated so close to home, you didn't have to worry about losing precious time commuting.

eventually, the two men made their way to the front, both jostling to get to the counter first. you waited patiently as they bickered and pointed fingers, each refusing to take responsibility for the shattered case of beer.

“oi, this bastard shattered a case of beer.”

“that wasn't me it was you.”

“as if.”

“well i ain't paying for it,” came the final reply with a sharp glaze your way.

you knew it was only a matter of time before the blame would fall on you, but you had grown accustomed to these petty disputes. with a smile, you offered to take care of it, hoping to diffuse the situation as quickly as possible.

the men, still grumbling but appeased for the moment, took their leave and headed for the door. you breathed a sigh of relief, grateful that they didn't try to engage with you further. you retreated to the backroom to gather the necessary cleaning supplies, mentally preparing yourself for the next unexpected hurdle.

it was an inconvenience, but at least this one made sense.

⚘. ⚘. ⚘.

the air is thick with the buzz of students rushing to and from their final exams. your own mind is a jumble of information, formulas, and theories that you've tried to cram into your brain in just a few short days. the relief of completing one of the exams is quickly replaced with a sense of exhaustion and the anticipation of the next one. you're stumbling down the hallway when you suddenly collide with someone.

hands steady you, preventing you from falling to the ground, and a familiar voice rings out with laughter.

it's urogi.

you can't help but feel a little surprised to run into him again, especially during such a hectic week. the finals schedule has thrown off your usual routine, making it difficult to anticipate who you might see on campus.

despite the chaos of the week, urogi rather collected. his eyes sparkle mischievously as he greets you, as if he knows something you don't. it's clear that he's not here by coincidence. you wonder if he's been keeping tabs on your schedule, or if he's simply a master of appearing when you least expect it.

you open your mouth to apologize for the collision, but urogi beats you to it. "well, well, well. look who it is! i thought i recognized your backside from a mile away," he jokes, playfully teasing you. 

you take a moment to look around and notice that the hallway is filled with students bustling to and fro. the fluorescent lights overhead cast an unnatural glow on everything. the air is heavy with the scent of stale coffee and sweat, a testament to the long hours spent cramming for exams.

in the midst of the chaos, urogi stands out like a beacon of calm. his hair is windswept and his clothing is slightly disheveled, but it only adds to his charm. his eyes dance as he talks, and you find yourself drawn into his infectious energy.

"finished with your exams?" he asks, his curiosity palpable. your last exam of today was one of the later ones, but fortunately, you've managed to escape the night classes this year. you don't know if you could survive that again. still unsure why urogi is talking to you, you respond politely. "yes, one more tomorrow, and i'm done."

urogi nods along. "right, right." as bodies move around you both, you can't help but notice the stares and whispers floating around. this is not the kind of additional stress you needed. you're already exhausted from studying and taking exams, and now you have to deal with gossip and speculation?

"well, i should get going. good luck with the rest of the week." urogi's gaze widens at your abruptness, and he reaches out to stop you. "hold on, i actually came to ask you something."

you can feel your heart rate increasing as you turn to face him. what could he possibly want?

“the thing is,” urogi begins, his voice low and conspiratorial. “i'm hosting an end of semester party tomorrow night. it'll be a chance for everyone to unwind and forget about their worries. you should come.”

you immediately go to decline, you barely know urogi but you know of the crowd he attracts. that definitely would not be your scene trapped in a house with all of them. “thanks for the offer but—”

urogi cuts you off, “it’d be really great if you came. aizetsu needs the break too and he’s more inclined to come if you do. “

he seems to sense your hesitation and reaches out to squeeze your shoulder. it's a show of camaraderie that surprises you. you didn't realize the two of you shared that kind of relationship.

“you still owe aizetsu a treat, right? you can use this as one,” he says with a wink.

you frown at his words, feeling as though you're being manipulated. you cant help but frown at that, “that feels more like a treat from you. which would make it twice youve done that.”

urogi shrugs as he pulls away,” really? i dont see it that way.” he waves of his shoulder as he departs, not giving you room to argue.

“catch up with aizetsu and coordinate. see you tomorrow,” he calls over his shoulder.

as you watch him disappear into the crowd, you're left wondering how quickly this semester has changed.

⚘. ⚘. ⚘.

the final exam had come to a close and the air in the classroom was charged with a palpable sense of relief and accomplishment. as the instructor wrapped up the semester with final words of praise and congratulations, you couldn't help but feel your spirits lift with each passing moment.

you were finally done.

as the rest of the class began to shuffle out of the door, your eyes drifted to aizetsu. despite trying not to think much of it, urogi's offer returned ahain. now, without the excuse of exams, it was harder to bat away.

making up your mind, you rushed to catch up with aizetsu as he made his way out of the classroom.

"aizetsu, hey!" you call out, your heart racing as you catch up to him. he turns at the sound of your voice, and you feel a jolt of something electric as his cool blue eyes meet yours. 

"did you feel confident about that? you should, after all the effort i put into quizzing you," aizetsu says, his voice low and smooth. you shake your head, trying to refocus your scattered thoughts.

"yeah, actually. thank you. i used your revision guide last night too." you reply, feeling grateful for his help during the exam preparation.

aizetsu nods. "good, you've earned the break." you notice something lighter in his posture today, something more friendly. "do you have work tonight?" he asks.

his question reminds you that you have something else to ask him. "no, actually, i wanted to see if you were planning to go to urogi's party."you say, your voice laced with a touch of hesitation. aizetsu raises an eyebrow, his expression quizzical.

"urogi's party?" he repeats. 

it feels odd to ask, given that they're brothers. but you feel as though you were right in assuming that aizetsu had no interest. as if to mirror your thoughts, he frowns. "no, i never really go. i didn't think it would be something you enjoyed either."

well, it seems you both have a pretty good scope of each other. a gesture that fills you with unexpected warmth. it gives you the courage to push further. "normally no, but i thought it could be fun?" you offer with a shrug. "and i still owe you a treat. let me buy you a drink?"

aizetsu is quiet as he considers you. it's almost as if he sees through you and can imagine the echoed conversation from between his brother and you yesterday. the scrutiny makes you nervous. but just as you go to take back your offer, he sighs with a shrug. "if that's what you want."

"yeah, i think it will be fun," you grin, more t ease with his acceptance.

"alright."

it appears that he wants to say something else but leaves it at that. you watch him go, feeling both relieved and anxious at the same time.

⚘. ⚘. ⚘.

as the evening draws closer, you can feel your anticipation building up. the last day of exams has left you feeling exhilarated, and you can't wait to let loose a little at urogi's party. but before you head out, you decide to put a little extra effort into your attire. you rummage through your closet, picking out an outfit that is both stylish and comfortable.

as you slip into your clothes, you can't help but wonder why you're putting in so much effort. after all, it's just a party, and you'll be surrounded by a bunch of drunken college students. but a part of you knows that you're doing it for yourself, to feel good and confident. and maybe, just maybe, you're hoping that aizetsu will notice too.

the memory of your conversation with aizetsu earlier in the day lingers in your mind. you can't shake off the feeling that something has changed between you two. the way he looked at you, the way he spoke to you - it all felt different somehow.

as you step off the bus, the bustling city surrounds you like a cloak. you take a deep breath, feeling the energy of the crowd electrify your senses. the sound of car horns and chatter mix together in a chaotic symphony, and the neon lights of the city create a vivid display of color.

but as you walk towards the address, you begin to realize that something is off. this is not the typical college housing area where you expected urogi's party to be held. instead, the street is lined with bars and clubs, their neon signs lighting up the night sky.

as you approach the establishment linked to the address, you notice a line of your classmates snaking along the sidewalk. it seems that urogi has chosen a more unconventional venue for his mid-semester bash. you can hear the muffled thump of the bass from inside the bar, and the scent of alcohol and sweat wafts towards you on the breeze.

for a moment, you hesitate. this is not your usual scene, and you feel out of place. 

as you approach the entrance, you notice a burly man, who must be the bouncer, engaged in a heated discussion with a student and another man who looks vaguely familiar.

the man’s furrowed brow gives him a perpetually annoyed expression, but you can't help but notice the resemblance between him and aizetsu and urogi. it's almost too obvious for you to believe that he's anything other than the third brother.

that leaves one left.

"there should have been a limit on the patrons," the man grumbles as he stares down at the line of students with a look of distain. "my brother knows the capacity and we're well past it."

"but i was invited," the girl protests, but neither even acknowledges her.

"they're welcome to wait until someone leaves, but i won't have regulators at my door over some college students," he says, turning to leave.

you scan the long line of people waiting outside the venue and a sense of disappointment settles over you. it looks like a never-ending queue, and you can't help but think that no one will be leaving the party anytime soon. the ingress and egress would surely be a nightmare for those at the back of the line, which includes you.

despite feeling a bit disheartened, you had made an effort to dress up for the occasion. you don't know why, but you had a feeling that tonight was special. maybe it was because aizetsu was coming, and you wanted to look your best for him. you hope that he will notice your extra effort, but you're not entirely sure if he will.

you pull out your phone to let him know about the situation. 

the least you could do was inform him that you tried. you uncover your phone and send a text

hey, the place is too packed for more entry. i’m going to head home. sorry for convincing you to come :(

his reply comes quicker than you expect.

are you still here?

a few blocks down? about to catch the bus soon.

the text is sent, and you wait for a reply. as you stand at the bus stop, you see the headlights of the approaching transport. but just then, a voice startles you.

“hey, why are you going home? did you not want to come?”

it's aizetsu, and you're surprised to see him standing there. he's dressed more casually than you, in a light shirt and jeans. you quickly explain the situation with the bouncer and the overcrowding.

“but you wanted to come?” he asks, and you can't help but feel a flutter of excitement in your chest.

“i mean, i guess. i got dolled up for it,” you reply, turning a bit to show off your outfit.

aizetsu gives you a quick once-over, and you feel a rush of warmth at the attention.

“then don't let it go to waste. let's go."

you're hesitant at first, but his encouragement pushes you forward. you feel a bit anxious about the overcrowding, but you're also thrilled to be going to the party with aizetsu.

aizetsu's determination to get into the club was unyielding and he led you back under the bright lights illuminating the entrance. despite the short amount of time that had passed, the line had remained steadfast, with the same resolute girl still standing at the front. aizetsu, however, was not deterred as he pulled you to the front of the line. the bouncer regarded you both with a cool stare.

“capacity limit,” he stated firmly.

“they were invited by both myself and urogi. kick someone else out if you want, kyogai, it won't make me sad,” aizetsu replied confidently.

kyogai seemed to consider the proposition for a moment, but ultimately gave in as aizetsu pulled you through the entrance. the waiting students erupted in protest, but their complaints were muffled as the sound of the music inside grew louder.

stepping into the club, you were struck by its beauty. the colors, lights, and sounds all melded together to create an atmosphere unlike any you had experienced before. the room was alive with energy and excitement, and you couldn't help but feel swept up in the moment.

the decor was impeccable, with plush velvet seating and shimmering crystal chandeliers hanging overhead. the bar was lined with a vast array of drinks, and the bartenders were busy mixing and shaking cocktails. the dance floor was a sea of bodies, pulsing with the beat of the music.

“this is beautiful,” you breathed, marveling at the sight before you.

“karaku designed it. he would appreciate the compliment,” aizetsu said and you realized that must be last of his brothers.

indirectly, that meant you were now aware of four of them. your mind raced with questions, but for now, you were content to lose yourself in the magic of the night.

as aizetsu leads you to the bar, you take in the lively atmosphere around you. the music pulsates through your body, vibrating every fiber of your being, and the colorful lights cast playful shadows on the walls. the decor is sleek and modern, with a futuristic vibe that seems to transport you to another dimension. it's a far cry from the usual places you frequent, but you find yourself enjoying the change of pace.

as you lean against the bar, taking in the scene, you feel a sudden tug on your shoulder. urogi stands before you, a wide smile on his face. his presence is commanding, and you can't help but feel drawn to him. his eyes roam over you, and you sense that he's impressed by your appearance.

"where have you been?" he says, his voice tinged with amusement. "fashionably late, i see." urogi dressed for the occasion, comfortable in a nice button up and slacks.

you smile in response, feeling a sense of comfort in his presence. "i wanted to make an entrance," you say playfully. "and i'm glad i did. this place is amazing."

urogi remains close and you can feel the warmth of his body against yours. he turns to the bar and raps his knuckles against the counter, “oi, karaku. you just going to just stand behind the bar oe do work?”

you watch as a handsome man with emerald eyes approaches them, his lips pulled in a tight frown.

it's clear that this man is urogi's brother, and you can see the family resemblance in their sharp features and confident demeanor.

his lips pull in a taut frown as he regards urogi, “i’m meant to manage the staff. since you decided to invite the entire campus.”

karaku's gaze shifts to you and you feel a flutter in your chest. he's just as attractive as his brothers and his eyes seem to penetrate your soul. you can't help but feel a little intimidated by him, but also curious.

“hey, its good business, right?”

“you don't know the first thing about running a business.”

“at least i go to school to learn.”

“And someone how come out dumber.”

“oi—”

as the brothers continue to bicker, you can't help but feel a sense of fascination with this family. they're unlike anyone you've ever met.

as karaku's piercing gaze meets yours again, your heart quickens, and you feel a flush spread across your face. "you're aizetsu's friend," he states matter-of-factly, his voice low and smooth.

you blink, momentarily stunned, before realizing that you've lost sight of aizetsu in the exchange. you glance over your shoulder and see him still leaning against the bar, a picture of nonchalance.

"yeah, that's right," you reply, extending a hand in greeting. to your surprise, karaku accepts the gesture.

"well, what will it be then?" he asks, his tone businesslike.

"oh, i thought you were just managing," you say, trying to keep up with the conversation.

"i am," he replies, his eyes flitting to the busy staff behind the bar. "but since my staff is busy because of him, now i have to step in. your choice?"

you quickly order a simple drink, but karaku frowns at your request. "do you take recommendations?" he asks.

"um, sure," you say, feeling a bit out of your depth.

karaku turns and reaches for a bottle, his hands moving with fluid grace. you watch in awe as he expertly mixes the ingredients, turning a plain liquor into a colorful and vibrant concoction that perfectly matches the atmosphere of the club.

he sets the drink in front of you, and you take a hesitant sip. the taste explodes on your tongue, and you can hardly believe how delicious it is. you take another sip, relishing the complex flavors that dance across your taste buds.

"this is great, thank you," you say, smiling up at karaku.

the corners of his mouth lift in a small grin. "glad you like it."

you fumble for your wallet, but karaku turns away before you can offer to pay. "sorry, i have to go manage my brother's itinerary," he says, his voice fading as he disappears into the crowd.

you feel a hand on your shoulder, and you turn to see urogi at the retreating figure. "hey, you're welcome for the tips, asshole," he says, nudging you playfully.

you laugh, feeling lightheaded from the drink and the atmosphere of the club. it certainly wasn't your typical scene, but you were glad you came.

he gestures to your hand, and you realize that you're still holding your wallet. "you can put that away," he says, "we got you covered. you're a guest."

you feel a twinge of guilt at the thought of being treated, but you realize that it's too late to back out now. aizetsu seems to sense your hesitation, and he steps in to reassure you. "you can get the next one," he says with a smile. "you still owe me a treat, right?"

you nod, feeling grateful for the generosity. it's not often that you get to experience something like this, and you want to make the most of it. you take a deep breath and let the atmosphere of the club wash over you. you can feel your body relaxing, your mind clearing. this is exactly what you needed.

"great," you say, a smile spreading across your face. "now let's really get partying."

in response, urogi grins and you feel yourself being tugged away.

⚘. ⚘. ⚘.

urogi's hands on your waist felt both warm and secure, guiding you along with the rhythm of the music. the dance floor was alive with movement, bodies swaying and pulsing to the beat. you caught glimpses of colorful lights flashing overhead, illuminating the club in a vibrant glow.

aizetsu was still nearby, but his serene demeanor made it clear he wasn't there to party in the same as the others. when you had tried to get him to join, he waved you off, telling you to have fun. you wondered what was weighing on his mind, but decided to let it be for the night. this was a chance to let loose and have some fun, after all.

urogi's voice broke through your thoughts, drawing your attention back to him. "you know, aizetsu's not one to hang out with anyone. he must think highly of you."

you felt a flutter in your chest at the thought. aizetsu was someone you admired greatly, and to know he valued your company was a special feeling.

urogi continued to lead you in the dance, his movements smooth and practiced. "and karaku doesn't just give out recommendations to anyone either. he's a bit of a stickler for quality."

you laughed at the thought of karaku being a hard-to-please critic. it was clear he took pride in his craft, and his passion showed in the drinks he served.

“that just leaves sekido.” urogi’s grip tights as he pulls you to his front. “but I think your luck will carry you through.”

as the night wore on, you felt yourself letting go of any worries or stresses. the music was loud, the drinks were flowing, and the company was good. you were grateful for this moment of pure enjoyment, surrounded by friends old and new.

as you dance with urogi, you become lost in the rhythm of the music and the swirling colors of the lights. your movements flow effortlessly with his as he pulls you closer, his hands finding the curve of your waist.

you glance over at aizetsu, but he seems lost in his own world, his expression solemn and unreadable as he relaxes by the bar. when he catches your gaze, he raises a drink with an equally raised brow. 

as you try to slip away from urogi's grasp, you find yourself lost in the surreal atmosphere of the party. the thumping bass of the music seems to pulse through your veins as the neon lights cast a hypnotic spell over the crowd. the scent of sweat and perfume mingles in the air, creating a heady aroma that makes you feel intoxicated.

urogi's hold on your wrist is loose, but his chin rests heavily on your shoulder. you feel his warm breath on your neck, and it sends shivers down your spine. you glance over at aizetsu, who seems to be lost in thought as he sips his drink at the bar. you can't help but feel guilty for abandoning him, especially since he came here with you.

you pull against urogi's grip once more, and he reluctantly lets you go.

“you think it matters but it doesn’t. we’re different but we all appreciate the same thing. try not to think so hard about it.”

his words are cryptic, and you can't help but wonder what he meant by 'we'. who was he referring to? the other party-goers? you shake your head, trying to clear your thoughts, but they remain jumbled and confused.

“urogi what—”

“urogi! finally, i’ve been stuck outside this whole time. why didn’t you come get me?”

just then, a whiny voice interrupts your musings. it's the girl from outside, and she seems to have managed to sneak in somehow. urogi greets her with a forced smile, but his grip on your wrist tightens once again. you can feel the tension in his body, and it makes you uneasy.

the girl's eyes flicker over to your joined hands, and you can see the jealousy simmering in her gaze. 

“who is this? didn't they come in with aizetsu?”

you're not sure how much more of this you can take, and you make another attempt to leave. but urogi pulls you even closer, his grip almost suffocating.

"sorry, we need a break," he says, and you can hear the irritation in his voice. you can feel your patience wearing thin as you try to extract yourself from his embrace, but he refuses to let go.

while you definitely agree with the statement, you weren't expecting to be pulled in the opposite direction of the bar. you can feel the tension in his muscles as he leads you towards a quieter corner of the club. the swaying throngs of people blur as you're led towards the next level of the club.

as you pass a red rope barrier, you realize it's a reserved section. the area is dimly lit, but you can make out a few plush couches and armchairs arranged around small tables. the air here smells different too, more luxurious and fragrant. not once does anyone move to stop you both. it's clear now that the club is not only managed by karaku, but also held some sort of ownership. 

you can't help but feel a sense of relief at the brief reprieve from the intensity of the party. you take a deep breath and let it out slowly, feeling the cool air against your flushed skin.

urogi's gaze meets yours and you can see a hint of vulnerability in his eyes. "i'm sorry about that," he says, his voice softening. "i wanted you to enjoy yourself, not feel overwhelmed."

you feel a pang of guilt at his words, realizing that you are indeed a stranger to all of this. but there's something about urogi's easy charm that puts you at ease.

“c’mon, i promised you a break.”

as urogi guides you into the room, the pulsing music fades away and the sounds of hushed voices and clinking glasses fill your ears. the dim lighting casts a warm glow on the faces of the people lounging around the room. your eyes immediately find aizetsu, who is leaning back against the couch, his drink held loosely in his hand. he must have slipped through the crowd at some point during the brief confrontation. 

“so they managed to get in.”

the voice is deep and smooth.this must be the final one, sekido. his presence commanded attention even from afar. as you approach him, you finally realize the last detail about him that you couldn't place before: his eyes are a piercing shade of vermillion, drawing you in with their intensity. he seems to have grown broader since you last saw him, his arms comfortably stretched over the back of the couch.

“hey, you saw them and didn't let them through? you ass.”

you glance up at urogi, who lets out a sigh as he leads you to the couch and positions you between himself and sekido. you can't help but wish that you were seated between him and aizetsu instead, but you push the thought aside. other than the initial comment, no one made you feel unwelcome.

"they weren't invited by me. apparently, you can thank aizetsu for doing it for you," sekido continues, a smirk playing on his lips.

urogi rolls his eyes and pulls you closer to him, his arm draped around your shoulders. "i can't believe you saw them all dolled up like this and didn't intervene on your own. i wouldn't have been able to resist."

sekido lets out a snort and reaches for his own short glass, taking a sip. "i hardly saw them. and i'm not you."

urogi's arm around you is both comforting and possessive, as if he's claiming you as his own. you're acutely aware of his body heat, the subtle movements of his muscles as he shifts to get more comfortable.

aizetsu, on the other hand, exudes an air of calm, his posture relaxed as he sips his drink. his eyes meet yours briefly and you detect a hint of amusement in his gaze.

sekido, with his broad shoulders and easy confidence, seems like the type of person functions as the foundation of the group. he lounges back against the couch with the careless grace of a panther, his eyes gleaming with a mischievous light. you can't help but feel a little intimidated by him, even though you know he means no harm.

you can feel the tension between the three of them, but you're too stimulated to fully comprehend it. you look around the room, searching for a distraction. "where is karaku?" you finally ask, trying to change the subject.

the man in question enters the room with a flourish, as if summoned, balancing bottles and glasses with practiced ease. you marvel at his skill, wondering how he manages to keep everything from spilling. the scent of rice wine fills the air as he sets the glasses down.

he apologizes for the plainness of the glass, but you don't mind at all. you're just grateful for the hospitality. urogi grumbles about karaku never wanting to meet his friends and you get the sense that there's a deeper tension between the two brothers.

you take a sip of the rice wine, savoring the complex flavors as they dance across your tongue. it's smooth and slightly sweet, with a subtle aftertaste that lingers in your mouth. 

“so what about you caught our brother’s interest?”

sekido's sharp gaze bores into you, and you feel yourself squirming uncomfortably under his scrutiny. his eyes seemed to be searching for something, but you couldn't decipher what.

you realize that befriending aizetsu had been quite an accomplishment. but you already partially knew that. the man was not one to socialize much, and you had to muster all your courage to approach him. you had always been anxious about approaching people, even those related to your studies, but something about aizetsu drew you to him.

as you recall the memories of your initial interactions with him, you can't help but smile. aizetsu wasn't the most talkative person, but over the months, he had opened up to you in ways you never expected. you liked being around him because it made him look less alone, but it was more than that. it was a two-way agreement, and he welcomed your presence, going as far as to save your seat when you became a regular.

"i just wanted to be his friend," you finally say, and that was the truth of it.

karaku's voice interrupts the silence that follows. "how cute."

you take another sip of your sake, trying to fill the void created by the unsaid words that were lingering in the air. the brothers around you slide into their own conversations, and you take a moment to observe your surroundings.

the room is dimly lit, casting an warm glow on the faces around you. the air is thick with the scent of sake and the gentle hum of conversation surrounds you like a warm embrace. you feel oddly secure, despite being surrounded by people you barely know.

around you, the air hums with the sound of the brothers' voices, blending together in a cacophony of chatter. it's both exhilarating and terrifying to be in the midst of such men, all of whom exude an aura of authority that's impossible to ignore. you glance down at the floor, where a pattern of intricate symbols is etched into the wooden planks. it's a reminder that you're sitting in their territory, and that fact isn't lost on you.

you're brought back to the present when you notice that your cup has been refilled, courtesy of karaku. the gesture is both generous and intimidating, as if he's reminding you of your place at the table. you take a sip of the drink, letting the liquid wash over your tongue and down your throat.

as you drink, urogi's arm slips back around your shoulders. his touch is surprisingly cool against the warmth of your skin, and you can't help but lean into it, relishing the sensation. you're not sure if it's the alcohol or the company, but you're starting to feel a little lightheaded.

urogi breaks the silence with a teasing question. "so, i want to hear more juicy details of why you like aizetsu. surely, i'm cuter."

you laugh, the sound bubbling up from deep within you. "aren't you all quadruplets? you all look the same."

urogi pouts, his lips twisting into a playful grimace. "oh, so you agree i'm attractive. but that also implies you don't see a difference between us. surely you can appreciate the polarity."

you squint, taking a closer look at urogi. out of all the brothers, he has the most boyish looks. "hmm, let me think," you say, pretending to deliberate. "i guess you do have a more youthful appearance, like aizetsu."

urogi grins mischievously. "oh, still too vague. let me give you something to compare." and with that, he leans forward and kisses you.

the sensation is both shocking and exhilarating. you're not sure what to do at first, but then you start to respond, letting yourself be swept up in the moment. urogi's lips are soft against yours, and his tongue teases yours playfully before he pulls away, leaving you breathless and flushed.

“so?”

for a moment, the air is heavy with the weight of what just happened. your dazed from the action, words thick on your tongue before you can finally manage,” i’ve … never kissed aizetsu.”

urogi’s gaze goes comically wide,” what? but you guys had such a nice date set up before.”

as urogi's words sink in, your mind races to catch up. you had never considered the possibility that your friendship with aizetsu could be interpreted as something open. the memory of your planned outing together suddenly feels like it's been cast in a new light, and you wonder if maybe you had been sending mixed signals all along.

“it wasn't a date… we were…” where were your words? 

but before you can even begin to sort through your thoughts, urogi's warm breath tickles your ear, and his words pull you back to the present. "were?" he asks, his voice teasing.

your heart flutters in your chest, and you feel a blush rising to your cheeks.

no, not were to imply something had changed.

because nothing had changed. you are—

you open your mouth to speak, but before you can find the words, karaku's voice cuts through the air like a knife.

"urogi, stop. you're confusing her."

you look up to see aizetsu seated across from you, his expression inscrutable. you can't tell if he's angry or hurt, but the tension in the air is palpable.

for a moment, you feel like you're drowning in a sea of emotions, unsure of which way to swim. you don't know what to say, or even if there's anything you can say to make things right.

as the silence stretches on, you become acutely aware of the atmosphere in the room. the low murmur of conversation from the other patrons of the bar seems to fade into the background, leaving only the sound of your own breathing ringing in your ears.

urogi pouts, “i just asked them a question.”

urogi's pout only adds to the surreal atmosphere, as if his expression alone were enough to challenge the laws of physics. aizetsu doesnt relent, “but you didn’t give them a fair sample to compare. you rushed ahead as usual.”

 the brothers continue their conversation, but you find it hard to focus on anything except the electricity that seems to be pulsing through the air.

rushed … ahead..?

just when you think things couldn't get any more intense, aizetsu leans over his brother to cup your face. you're taken aback by the sudden closeness, but before you can even process what's happening, his lips are on yours. the kiss is firm, yet gentle, and you feel your head spin as you lose yourself in the moment. this is the closest you've ever been to him, closer even than during your study sessions.

when he pulls away, you're left gasping for breath, still reeling from the experience. and then, just as suddenly, urogi turns on you. "so now you have a comparison. can you tell the difference?"

you can feel the weight of their gazes on you, but you can't bring yourself to face them. you're not sure if you're ready to handle the scrutiny, not after being kissed by both brothers in such a short span of time. it's all too much, too surreal, and you're struggling to find your footing in this strange new reality.

"look at that flush. now i'm intrigued, you found an interesting one, aizetsu."

you feel a rush of emotions as sekido's words weigh heavy on your mind. was that what they thought of you? were you just another classmate to take advantage of their brotherly bond? the thought makes your heart ache and you feel a sudden urge to leave, to preserve what little dignity you have left.

but before you can make a move, sekido's hand is on your arm, pulling you towards him.

“the two of you are still close from familiarity. they need an outlier to appreciate the variance.”

 you can feel the roughness of his calloused skin against your flesh, sending shivers down your spine. as he cranes your head up, you can't help but feel a flutter in your stomach at the intensity of his gaze.

"pay attention," he commands before dropping his mouth to yours.

sekido's kiss is ravenous and urgent, surpassing any notion of chastity as he devours your mouth. his tongue slips past your lips and explores every inch of your mouth with a hunger that takes your breath away. you try to match his intensity, but your chest heaves as you struggle to keep up with his passion. when he pulls away, your head spins from the sheer force of the kiss.

you're left dazed and disoriented, your mind racing with questions and doubts. how had this night come to this? to be caught in the middle of the brothers, playing with your affection? you can't help but feel like you're in over your head, unsure of where this unexpected turn of events will take you.

“well, suppose it's only fair, eh?”

as karaku approaches, you can feel the energy shift, a palpable tension in the air. his presence is suave, and you find yourself captivated by the way he moves, the way he carries himself with such confidence and grace.

he kneels before you, and you feel a jolt of expectation as he leans in to kiss you. the touch of his lips is electric, a subtle shock that ignites a fire within you. his kiss is practiced, but not cold - he leads you through a dance of passion, his movements sure and fluid, his touch light but commanding.

as he pulls away, you can feel your breath catch in your throat, your heart racing with a mixture of excitement and fear. you are unsure of what just transpired, of what it all means - but one thing is clear: this was no longer a simple game.

his thumb brushes across your lips, and you can feel the heat of his gaze as he looks into your eyes. his voice is low and seductive, a whisper that sends shivers down your spine.

"pretty, pretty," he murmurs. "so what do you think, are we so similar?"

[estellardreams]

Hehe welp back onto the "Sharing a room" bit I think I can make this work-

Granted the sitcom format starts going down in between all of the pain and misery and suffering- I'm getting ahead of myself OKAY!

I think that although all of them don't like it, Wukong personally would not want to sleep anywhere near Macaque... And the lesser of two evils seems much better. Red only chose the middle one to stop the constant arguing and forced cuddling cause he absolutely HATED that and hated how every single time the shadow monkey tried to initiate it reminded him of King Red. And he HATES King Red so no surprise there. Which left the only other bed available to Macaque... Simple.

Sleep positions feel all over the place, too. Do you think that once Red gets ahold of a plush he starts hugging it in his sleep cause I think he would do that out of instinct okay-

Wukong just... Loses half of his blanket to the floor he moves around so much. That is not his bed it's for the next two years sadly why is it so UNCOMFORTABLE why isn't it like his home back at flower fruit mountain like a silky hammock or plush mattress it's way too FIRM-

Red probably sleeps just fine on a more firm mattress. He doesn't sleep on beds too often mostly at his desk tbh but when he does that mattress needs to support him not sink him in. But sometimes the insomnia kicks in and it's nearly impossible for him to fall asleep... That is until Wukong finally helped him get a small plush a way to rebel against the King's image: A cutesy pony doll. Sure it's made out of hair but what can you do in this situation?

Macaque CANONICALLY SLEEPS ON TREES. He's more monkey than the Monkey King for crying out loud! So of course a stiff bed isn't going to be much of a problem. The new issue is that he's not used to having so much ROOM on a mattress it feels like you're sleeping on concrete now why is it like that and not slightly itchy bark why-

*ahem* anyway. Silly rambles aside I'm sure everyone's having a great time, right? /sarcastic

[DKR and TT Red belong to @purble-turble]

Original bedroom model I made:

Seperated images + no blanket transparent (for poses) below cut:

[cobra-creampuff]

and one more thing. i like thinking about what if mickey was - depending on your definition - a virgin before he was with ian. it's really not much of a stretch tbh.

he's 16(?) their first time together

he's DEEPLY closeted

he may or may not be in denial, i go back and forth on this (and yes i know that extra-canonical sources have said he is, i don't care about the council's decision whether it's a stupidass one or not)

so like my thought is. he's pretty young. i know shameless has literally everybody fucking casually by the time they're fourteen but that is absolutely one of the most unrealistic aspects of the show lmfao. so anyway, he's pretty young. so there's that.

if we say he's in denial, and we take into account that he later is shocked by and very against the idea of pegging, it's pretty unlikely that he would seek out or ask for penetration even from women. and even in denial, it's not unbelievable that he wouldn't try rounding bases with women more conventionally either, although of course some people do. it might just not occur to him, or it might be too off-putting to go through with when he isn't being forced.

+ i kind of think that if mickey is in denial by the time of canon, it's the "i have more important things to worry about than getting a girlfriend" flavor, rather than a more "i am definitely into women and i can prove it" flavor. just because like. he really does have more important things to worry about. his one parent seems to be in jail more often than not and his siblings don't seem to have a collaborative relationship like the gallaghers do. mickey must have to spend a lot of time and energy on getting his basic needs met. if he has no interest in women, there's a readily available reasoning that has no relation to his sexuality (meaning he never has to think about it at all).

if he isn't in denial, he still can't hook up with anyone in his neighborhood. ian does while still closeted himself, but he's not as paranoid about someone telling on him as mickey is - not to mention ian doesn't care if other gay people know he's gay, why would he? but mickey doesn't just not want to be out, he doesn't want to be gay. just as much if not more, he doesn't want to be vulnerable. so he's not about to tell some kid at school, even if he knows for sure that they're gay too. he needs everyone around him to only know things that make him intimidating. so first of all, he needs to be bullying that kid. more relevantly, he needs to be seen as untouchable, which by necessity means he needs to be untouched. or at the very least not touched in any kind of way that involves even the remotest genuine intimacy, and a shared secret certainly is that - not even getting into the intimacy of doing something you have some type of Feeling about that can only be done with another person.

so if he did want to hook up, he'd have to go Somewhere Else to do it. but now there are so many active steps he has to take, so many times he has to choose over and over again to go Be GayTM, some of which are already GayTM in themselves. he has to decide he wants it enough to do it. he has to decide how far away is far enough. he has to look up and find a gay bar. he has to figure out how to get there. he has to pick a date and time. he has to earn and save enough money for transportation and at least one drink. he has to make up an excuse to have ready if he gets questioned when he leaves or gets home. he has to actually fucking go to a gay bar. he has to actually go inside a gay bar when he gets there. he has to order a drink at a gay bar. he has to stay at a gay bar. he has to look at other men gayly. in person. on purpose. and be seen doing it. if no one picks him up first, he has to pick up another man. he has to communicate in some way to another man that he wants to have sex with him. he has to pick somewhere immediate to do it, because no way is he going to share enough time with this guy to get to a secondary location. and only after all of those steps, many of them likely to require several attempts, none of them easy, only THEN can he finally have the sex. AND!! even then, he still has to bring himself to Be GayTM enough to get involved with the guy's dick. it's easy enough to rationalize later that a mouth is a mouth and the gender of the person it's attached to doesn't really matter; it's much harder to say that about penetrative sex. less so if you top, but still.

so. in my professional opinion. it's very believable that before ian, the "furthest" mickey had gone was receiving a blowjob. and of course he would have skipped right over kissing. (like obviously it's also believable that he would go through all those steps; a teenager will go to the fucking moon if they're horny enough and ready + there's plenty of text to support mickey being the type of guy that if he's gonna do it he's gonna do it all. and it's also believable that he might have been sexually active or at least not completely inactive with women despite not being attracted to them, with textual support for that too. but that's not what we're talking about rn!)

so okay. sure, all that. but then why ian?

well. there's text to suggest mickey maybe had a little crush on ian already. constantly making a nuisance of himself at ian's workplace. staying long enough to put on a little (non-violent) show about it when ian's there, as compared to efficiently hitting and robbing kash when ian is absent. calling him an arguably flattering if crass (and it's mickey so flattering but crass is... just flattering) nickname that directly references his pubic hair - *katya voice* UN-PRO-VOKED!

ian is good looking, obviously. he's got the red hair, which is a preference i like to think mickey had before that being with ian just compounded. perhaps exponentially lmfao. ian also has a personality we can reasonably assume is attractive to mickey even before he knows him that well. he's assertive and brave enough to challenge mickey directly, and especially with kash to compare to ian is definitely a Big Tough Man (even if that's more in attitude than in body at that particular point). and the fact that he's not afraid and not overly aggressive either gives at least some measure of impression that he doesn't have much need or desire for the upper hand - nonthreatening without being weak, wimpy, or boring.

now. not all bottoms are subs. this is true. and not all subs like it rough, and some people who like it rough aren't subs even if they are bottoms. all true. i implore you to look at mickey. now look into your heart. now look at mickey. you know these disclaimers are, in this case, only disclaimers. as such, you KNOW that fight - and ian being the one to start it, even if he didn't win - got mickey so so fired up.

so. ian's hot. he's mickey's type. mickey is teenager horny generally, and now also horny situationally. they are in mickey's bed. mickey is in a mild state of undress. they are touching. ian is between mickey's legs. he's not taking advantage of mickey's hesitation - and he only threatened and then defended himself, never actually getting more aggressive than necessary, i.e. he won't hurt mickey if mickey gives him physical opportunity. the vibes say ian won't use knowledge of mickey's sexuality against him afterward. it's possible mickey already knows he's gay (he seems to, but i always took the potential indications as a continuity error since there's really no sub/textual reason why he would and there are many other such cases).

he's right there, right now, and mickey wants him, and he's safe. bada boom bada bang, baby.

and. one more thing. i like to think about. if mickey hadn't had sex before ian. and we accept that he was lying about having sex in juvie (which we do). and we accept that he was lying about having sex with angie (which we do). and we discount the 3.06 incident with svetlana, since it wasn't consensual (which we do). and we accept that the trucker lady he used to humiliate himself but didn't actually have sex with was the only sexual contact he had while ian was away because he was too miserable to want any, as seems pretty strongly implied (which we do). and if we accept that the show was tragically canceled in the s4 hiatus (which we do lol).

then. in that case. ian is not only mickey's First Time (depending on your definition) and First Kiss, but in fact his only "all the way" sexual partner and only kiss. (and also first and only given bj.)

like, don't get me wrong, i don't believe in or enjoy the First, Last, & Only thing in a purity or like one-true-love way, that shit sucks. however. in a possessive way? pretty sexy. and i know ian would agree. he told me so himself.

(i also just kind of like the idea for mickey specifically. like he fully believed that he would never ever in his whole life ever have the kind of intimacy he has with ian in the end. that it was straight up impossible and there wasn't any point in even so much as thinking about it. and then... he gets it anyway, on his very first try.) (disclaimer again: yes romantic and sexual relationships aren't the only intimate relationships, no monogamy and/or long term commitment aren't inherently more intimate than other dynamics nor are they mutually necessary, yes relationships that end have equal benefit and value to relationships that don't. post not intended to be representational or reflect a widely applicable worldview it's just about this one specific guy etc etc, brought to you by a polyamorous aromantic wejustdon'tknowsexual believe me i get it i know it i live it.)

[pluto-sims]

Y2K Patterns, Graphics and Palette

sooo i found some funky patterns and vintage graphics AGES ago and simlish-ified and recoloured them, started doing some recolours of the HSY cas items.....and never finished them at all lmao. anyway I was requested to share the patterns and figured hey, why not share everything? Further details under the cut, but TLDR; 37 patterns as PS pattern files and PNGs, 22 graphic PNGs, 7-swatch palette file >:)

Details

37 patterns; available as Photoshop Pattern files and as stand-alone PNGs. Known issues: some of the patterns have a few white seams....sorry! I don't know how noticeable it is when used to recolour items. Feel free to scale them up a bit to get rid of the seams, or, if there's any you really want edited but aren't sure how to, please send me a message and I can do it!

22 graphics; all in simlish, all with a transparent background.

7 Swatch palette; sharing the PS palette, but you can also just colour pick from the preview image, which also includes the hex codes.

aaaaaaand I think that's it lmao. sorry again that some of the patterns have a lil white seam; i made these all ages ago and ngl, i'm too bloody lazy to go through and check each one because i am trash ;)

do whatever you want with the patterns, graphics and palette as long as it isn't paywalled (including early access).

Download: SFS PATREON (both 100% free to everyone, always)

[writingquestionsanswered]

Why don't you accept questions about certain sensitive topics? You could tag the touchy topics, put the answers under the "Read More" cut, and warn them, so people can avoid them if they don't feel comfortable with the subject matter; it's on them if they chose to read regardless and they get upset as a result.

It's a personal choice, not an audience choice. #1 - I'm the one who isn't comfortable with the subject matter.

#2 - "The subject matter" in question mostly involves subjects that are best handled by experts in fields that deal with those subjects. As I'm not a therapist/psychologist/psychiatrist/social worker/counselor, etc. and I don't even write about those subjects, I don't feel particularly qualified to answer those questions anyway.

#3 - I'm uncomfortable with the degree to which these topics are exploited by edge lords who include them in stories for drama, shock value, and other bad faith reasons, and I don't want to perpetuate or condone this.

#4 - There is a staggering amount of free, easy to access information on all of these topics available with a quick Google search, not to mention numerous YouTube videos and books as well. I am a firm believer that anyone who wishes to include these topics thoughtfully and respectfully isn't looking for a cheat sheet from a writing blog, but is putting in the time and effort to research the topics on their own.

I apologize if this is an inconvenience. My posts WQA’s Guide to Internet Research and Writing About Difficult to Research Topics can help you with research. ♥

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

I’ve been writing seriously for over 30 years and love to share what I’ve learned. Have a writing question? My inbox is always open!

♦ Questions that violate my ask policies will be deleted! ♦ Please see my master list of top posts before asking | ♦ Learn more about WQA here

[mysteriousmissfsart]

Twisted Wonderland Rambles #11

The halloween update is here!

It has brought us something I was expecting at some point and a complete surprise that makes me so happy I want to cry!

First of all, we have a Nightmare before Christmas themed event, which I expected at some point and I love it. We get to see Jack, Sally and Zero! (From what I could see as I skipped through the chapters this morning) (Do tell me if you've found translations and where I could read them as well!)

I remember being scared of the movie as a kid but as I grew up, I also grew to love these characters and their story. I don't know why I was scared and I haven't watched it since I was a kid and was scared of it. I'm planning on actually watching it now as an adult.

Having this event in the game is a dream come true but one thing I wasn't expecting was to get a character based of off Jack Skellington this early!

Here he is!

Say hello to our new Twisted boy, Skully/Scully J. Graves! (Still unsure of the spelling but we'll find out in due time.)

Isn't he just perfectly imperfect to the point where you just want to squish him into a hug and give him the world- OKAY, I'LL STOP.

Guess how much more perfect he is?

Here:

Do you know the voice actor for this guy?

And this guy?

Yeah, his name is Kappei Yamaguchi and he voices our new boy Skully. (I'll use this spelling, it kinda matches with how Jack's name is spelled)

Suprised, right?

Well, I silently screamed in happiness because I've missed Kaito so much and was blessed with Skully. Kappei Yamaguchi uses the same voice he does for Kaito which suits Skully surprisingly well. It feels like he'll be an extravagant and goofy guy which reminds me a lot of Kaito's personality. I love them both!

I literally had my mom and my siblings listen to him speak and tell me if they recognized his voice and my mom recognized the voice! This is the best thing ever!(My mom loves Detective Conan and a lot of other anime series) I am planning on saving up for when he's available but I'm currently saving for Malleus's birthday card-

Anyway,

Here are some more screenshots from the first few chapters!

Malleus looks so good!!!! I really wanted him to have an SSR because I want to see him with art of Jack Skellington. But hey, it works out in my favor. It's a lot easier for me to stop myself from spending my keys and diamonds until his birthday banner.

Next!

Here he is! The star of the show and one of my fave Disney characters! (Even though I haven't watched the movie since my irrational bout of fear as I said earlier) He looks awesome!

Next!

Look at Zero! He's so cute!!!!!! I did see him chasing Grim around LOL. They'll get along eventually!!

Sadly I didn't have the time to screenshot Sally but I'll do it later and upload some more screenshots. I've also just realized that I didn't crop out the phone screen thingy that appears at the bottom of the screen, ugh. Sorry about that! I'll just have to leave it as is. I might come back and fix it later.

One last screenshot!

Skully J. Graves and Jack Skellington standing side by side. What an awesome sight! No, like, really, I love this. It just looks awesome and it's crazy that I get to see this with my own eyes.

Can someone tell me what that thing on Skully's head is? Is that a headbeand? If it is, that's a sick headbeand and I want one.

Also, I'm curious as to why he's wearing sunglasses? Could it be that his eyes are sensetive to light or maybe he's hiding them for some reason???? I'm really curious about that and whether we'll find out about that . I hope he takes the glasses off at some point.

Anyway,

This is what I wanted to share currently and I'm curious about what you think and if you have any theories about how this event will turn out!

Can't wait to hear what you think!

[thelazyhermits]

Found myself wanting to talk about my Yuu's friendship with Trey, so I'll do that underneath the cut.

For the record, I honestly can't remember what all I have and haven't said about the Yuu & Trey relationship, so I'm just gonna make this is a post that provides the most up-to-date info on them since I am prone to changing my mind about little things here and there on occasion lol

One thing I do know that I've said in the past is that Trey acts like a big brother figure to Yuu and treats her kindly as a result. He really dotes on her, much like how he does with Riddle.

His favoritism is really obvious to everyone except Yuu who just thinks Trey is being nice cause she gets along well with Riddle and is one of the few people that tries to help Trey out and never adds onto his always busy workload.

While Yuu isn't exactly wrong, there's a lot more to Trey's favorable treatment of her, which I can't remember if I've discussed in detail in the past, so I'll just do that here.

At the beginning of the school year, Trey had every intention to treat Yuu like he does all the other first years, although he, of course, wanted to a gentleman to the best of his ability since that's just how he was raised, even though, according to his 2024 Halloween SR vignette, the poor guy is actually awkward around girls, at least older ones anyway, cause he has zero experience with them 😂

As a result, there is some awkwardness between these two at times, but thankfully, Trey is never as bad as Deuce used to be. That's because he mentally just started treating Yuu like he does his little sister in order to avoid that awkwardness and cause being a big bro just comes naturally to him.

Despite this, Trey still wanted to avoid treating Yuu too differently from everyone else back when he hadn't been particularly attached to her, but all his efforts were for naught.

Because she just reminded him too much of Riddle - to the point he couldn't ignore her.

As shown in this drabble, Trey learns early on that Yuu had a past that was similar to Riddle's, but he still intended to not give her any special treatment since Trey doesn't strike me as the type who gets easily attached/friendly with people.

(Despite how my writing may imply otherwise, I don't consider Trey to be the dad/mom/big bro of Heartslabyul who's always willingly looking out for people cause he's a genuinely nice guy, like how he's often portrayed in fanon.

Because Trey is just as sly as all the other NRC boys. He can be as petty/vindictive as the others if he gets irritated enough.

And he doesn't do all the work around the dorm simply cause he wants to. He does it to keep the peace cause the dude just wants a calm, normal school life and keeping Riddle happy is crucial to ensure that happens lol

However, that said, I do think, once you've earned Trey's respect/friendship, he would look after you like he does Riddle since their relationship tells us that Trey takes care of the people who truly matter to him.

That's why Trey is always warm/friendly toward Yuu in my fics cause, by that point in the timeline, they're friends, and he genuinely cares about her well-being.)

However, Trey's plans go out the window when the events of Book 2 happen cause Yuu prevents his canon injury and takes his pain as a result, which Trey really didn't take well cause he did not like the idea of Yuu suffering pain meant for him. It made him feel really guilty even though he did nothing wrong.

As a result, Trey really fussed over Yuu when she came to stay at his dorm following her injury cause Riddle had refused to allow her to return to her dorm cause he felt it was his dorm's responsibility to take care of her since she was in pain cause of him/Trey.

Trey volunteered his room for Yuu to use since there weren't any free ones available due to Heartslabyul dorm being the one dorm that's at full capacity, and Riddle was willing to share his room with Trey.

Anyway, Trey spent a lot of time with Yuu during this period of time since he felt it was his responsibility to look after her, and because of this, things really started to change because Trey started learning more about Yuu.

During this time, Trey realizes how difficult it is for Yuu to rely on others, and that it's not cause she's prideful or anything like that. She's just so accustomed to not having someone to rely on - someone she can trust - that it's just her nature to try to do everything on her own regardless of the kind of condition she's in.

That's why living at Heartslabyul is a rough adjustment for Yuu at first since Trey and the others are willing to do everything for her so she won't have to move her "injured" ankle.

Plus, Riddle has completely taken over the investigation that Crowley assigned to Yuu, so she won't have to do anything but focus on her recovery, which also takes some time for her to accept since she feels that's her job to do and it makes her feel guilty/useless that she can't complete the job assigned to her and has to be helped.

The more Trey observes Yuu and sees how hard it is for her to rely on others/how hard she is on herself/how prone she is to apologizing even when she hasn’t done anything wrong, the more uncomfortable he feels because all he can think about is what he knows about her past.

And he's really not liking the mental image that's forming as the puzzle pieces slowly come together.

However, what really hits him like a sucker punch is the one time when he had reached out to her to ruffle her hair, and Yuu, who hadn't realized what he was doing and wasn't paying attention at the time, flinched.

It was an unconcsious action on Yuu's part since, at that point in time, her body was just so accustomed to bad things happening whenever people reached out to her.

In that moment, the breath left Trey's lungs in an instant, and his blood turned to ice.

Because he knew exactly what that kind of unconscious action implied.

Even though Riddle was never physically abused, I still can see Trey being able to recognize those signs. I feel like what happened with Riddle when they were kids would lead to Trey doing some research on the subject of child abuse, perhaps because he thought it would in some way help.

Or perhaps a documentary or something along those lines about that topic came on TV one day and Trey, filled with thoughts of Riddle, couldn't bring himself to turn the channel.

This is how Trey Clover became one of he first people to realize Yuu had an abusive upbringing.

Fortunately for Yuu, Trey isn't the type to stick his nose where it doesn't belong, so he never tries to question her about her past. He never brings up the topic at all, so Yuu doesn't even know that Trey has figured out she was physically abused back in her world.

Because Yuu is from another world, meaning there's no one to report to the authorities cause her abuser is obviously back in her world, Trey knows that she's no longer in danger, which is why he doesn't try to tell anyone about this discovery or try to get Yuu to talk to him about her past.

Even though Trey feels that he shouldn't get involved since he doesn't want to risk causing trouble for Yuu by doing/saying something he shouldn't, Trey just can't ignore her now that he knows what kind of past she has.

But it's not out of pity. I just think that, after he "failed" Riddle when they were kids, Trey has the kind of mentality where, if he were to find himself in another similar situation, he'd be unable to ignore it cause he'd want to succeed and help the person, like he couldn't do in the past, especially if that person is someone he has begun to care about.

Trey just can't leave Yuu alone; his inner demons won't let him.

As a result, from that point on, Trey does his best to look out for Yuu, and he tries to be subtle about it and mostly fails since Trey really isn't good at being subtle when it comes to doting lol

It's because of Trey's decision to look out for Yuu that this relationship eventually turns into a close friendship cause, as time passed, Trey steadily grew fonder of Yuu the more time he spent with her, resulting in him becoming the big bro figure he is in my fics.

It was never Trey's intention for things to turn out like this, but Yuu completely won him over with all the compliments she gave his baking/cooking, her efforts to help him around his dorm, her growing friendship with Riddle, etc.

Amusingly enough, what also was a big factor in this development is that Yuu is one of the few people who doesn't try to ask Trey for help/favors or put work on his shoulders. On the contrary, she always tries to avoid doing anything that she thinks would be a bother to him.

The more Yuu would resist Trey's attempts to dote on her, which were essentially Trey's way of thanking her for her efforts, the more Trey wanted to dote on her and get her to willingly accept it lol

I just think it'd be funny if Trey's the type who would take this sorta thing as a challenge since normally he always gets his way when he implements his doting techniques, so he can't just allow himself to continue to be rebuffed.

Also, Trey just can't ignore the voice in his head that wonders if Yuu has anyone to rely on. Does she really think she needs to handle everything alone - that she doesn't deserve to be helped or receive positive attention?

It becomes like a personal mission of sorts for Trey, and because he's very good at what he does, he's able to eventually bring Yuu's walls down and get her to rely on him. It takes time, of course, but Trey is nothing if not patient.

That's how Trey becomes one of the upperclassmen whom Yuu feels the most comfortable relying on and why Yuu doesn't mind being doted on by him.

Because of his efforts, Yuu has a high opinion of Trey and a lot of respect for him since he's always working so hard to keep the peace at his dorm and does so much to keep everything working smoothly.

She also thinks he's very kind since he's always looking out for her and is always soft toward her during their interactions.

Now, that's not to say that Yuu doesn't know there's more to Trey than the sweet big bro persona he adopted when dealing with her since she knows full well that he's not someone to mess with.

That's why she considers him to be the dark horse of Heartslabyul - the most dangerous guy and someone she never wants to piss off cause she knows how cunning he can be and that he's a force to be reckoned with if you get on his bad side.

It's something she has learned from observation since he has never gotten mad at her, like he has at the members of his dorm lol

Yuu is completely oblivious to the fact that it would take a lot for Trey to ever get that mad at her cause he's developed a soft spot for her. She really has no idea about the kind of power she holds by being someone both Trey and Riddle are fond of, which Cater points out a lot haha

Anyway, Yuu & Trey end up developing a good, strong friendship during the course of the school year. It's why they both become so comfortable around each other and why it's easy for them to relax when they're alone together.

And they both really need that kind of relationship in their lives since those two are always hard at work & have busy/stressful schedules, so it's good for them to have those moments, such as when they bake together, when they can de-stress.

I just really love this relationship since Yuu & Trey are pretty similar in that they're good at keeping the peace, they always end up with a lot on their plates, and the fact that the way they act can lead to people incorrectly assuming they're too kind for their own good/are pushovers.

They're both also similar in that they're both really scary when they're pissed lol 😂

I just think this dynamic is a lot of fun cause of those similarities and cause I'm just a sucker for doting big bro figures 💕

[loemius]

31. What post have you seen recently that makes you wanna scream lmao <3

oh boy youre asking me for the spicy hot takes tonight huh. i am always happy to deliver <3 i dont want to put anyone in particular on blast so ill refrain from mentioning specific posts, but i do find that a lot of content lately in the helpol sphere has been very... surface level. a lot of moodboards, a lot of basics, 101 level content, stuff like 'the gods love you!!'. which isn't inherently a bad thing whatsoever. there is a need for that kind of content! however, i've also noticed in my 2 years on helpol tumblr that a lot of the reconstructionist blogs and informative blogs that i used to follow have either went inactive or deactivated entirely. and i can't help but wonder why this is. i think there's a lot of reasons for it: frustration with the shallowness of content leading to people going off and becoming more solitary practitioners, the more you grow in your practice the less compelled you may become to share it, but also i think a lot of people use tumblr and people's ask boxes as a search engine and that leads to a lot of burnout. it certainly did for me -- i took a hiatus from posting for a long time because i wasn't in a place to educate people. it's a lot of pressure, especially on tumblr where it feels like people will jump down your throat if you're incorrect about things or you suddenly become an Authority that people look up to when youre just a person. people who were posting really helpful and informative content about the theoi simply arent here anymore, and i really think the community's gravitation towards easily consumable content and reliance on people to do research for them is a large part of this. i realize not everyone is recon, which is very much okay, although i personally love being recon. that being said, i still think you should do your best to do your research and understand where these ideas come from. they didn't appear out of thin air -- mediterranean culture is very much alive still and is a continuation of the ancient world, and to not acknowledge or understand it is disrespectful to both the cultural context of the theoi and mediterranean people whose culture we claim to revere. i don't expect everyone to become an academic or a classicist. its not accessible to everyone for a variety of reasons, but i do think like. checking out some of the primary sources in a way thats accessible for you or picking one really good book to really deep dive into would benefit a lot of people. basically, i just wish i saw more in depth posts and people engaging on a deeper level with their faith and being willing to post it so we can have more discussions as a community and grow together. helpol is unique among other polytheistic religions because we have a wealth of primary sources available to us, and that isn't always the case for other polytheistic religions. i think it's... honestly kind of sad that we don't really talk about them. its not that i dont want to see peoples upg or that i dont think there should be posts for beginners, because there is a place for it and i enjoy that content too, but i wish there was more variety in the kinds of posts we have in the community. i miss the days when the tags were full of people writing their own prayers or people talking about a new source they read and what they thought, or compiling something for their own practice and being willing to share it with the community. i guess this is my sign to get back to posting my own original content and make the kind of content i want to see in hopes it'll encourage others to do the same. anyway i got on my little soapbox about this and its time for me to hop off before i hit character limit (again lmao). thank you so much for this ask, this was really refreshing and cathartic for me to talk about. may the gods bless you with health, happiness, and love always <33

[ashleywool]

health update/diatribe/infodump BUT THERE'S A CAT VIDEO AT THE END

Dearest reader: This should be a simple health update, but instead, it's an obnoxiously detailed info-dump written by the kind of person who knows more than most people about American health insurance but is still surprised at how it continues to find new and innovative ways to suck. If this is not the type of thing your brain or nervous system wants to wrap itself around, I don't blame you one bit, but if it is, I hope you'll at least walk away having learned something or being at least mildly entertained. If not, feel free to

SCROLL TO THE END FOR A HTDIO-ADJACENT CAT VIDEO!

When last we left our third-or-fourth-favorite mildly niche-famous T-list Broadway person, she was finally on the brink of getting a brain and pituitary MRI. This was supposed to happen on Friday.

But I wasn't allowed to get the MRI on Friday because Cigna's pre-authorization was still pending and there was nothing my doctor could do to escalate its urgency, nor could they withdraw the order. They couldn't do anything at all until the third-party organization that approves the pre-authorizations signed off on its medical necessity.

Look, I get it. This is an expensive and labor-intensive procedure, so they have to be thorough. I mean, sure, my doctor said it was medically necessary, and sure, they sent the additional clinical information to confirm its medically necessity, and sure, every order at every stage was marked as urgently medically necessary, and it was sent for processing on Monday, but how can they REALLY be sure it's medically necessary until my case is also reviewed by doctors who have NEVER seen me, and don't work weekends or holidays, and will get around to reviewing it at their own leisure? The folks at the radiology clinic rescheduled me in their next available spot and maintained that they'd contact me as soon as possible to fill any upcoming cancellation spots.

A ridiculous mildly annoying setback was that their next available appointment wasn't until July 26. They couldn't attempt to book me at any of the other dozens of clinics affiliated with this hospital network, because the pre-authorization is site-specific, which is like buying someone a gift card from the Starbucks on my block only to find out that they won't honor it at the Starbucks two blocks down perfectly reasonable, because I'm sure every site has differences that can't be perceived from a patient perspective.

Oh, and the existence of a pending pre-authorization prevented them from doing the MRI that day even if I'd had $8K in cash to pay out of pocket for the procedure. Which is perfectly reasonable, because why shouldn't American healthcare policy punish rich people too? I'm sure it's many flavors of unethical for one doctor to do something without the approval of another doctor even though the doctor whose approval it hangs on has NEVER SEEN ME.

One fellow in particular--I'll call him Quincy--gave me some insider info on how to prepare for the types of advocacy he's had to do in the past with this particular pre-authorization team, and which numbers to call and questions to ask. He isn't technically supposed to know this stuff and also isn't technically supposed to share it, but says he does it all the time anyway--hence why I'm keeping him anonymous. Quincy isn't his real name, but Quincy is a real one, and I took in his information like a medieval warrior selecting the choicest armor to prepare for battle the informed and fully compliant patient I strive to be.

Anyway, a few persistent phone calls later, a Cigna rep informed me that the middlemen would approve the pre-authorization for the MRI on the condition that I get the procedure done at a standalone radiology facility instead of a hospital-affiliated facility. Which is like buying someone a gift card that could only be honored at Starbucks kiosks located inside Target stores, but not at a standalone Starbucks or anywhere else in Target perfectly reasonable, I know the insurance companies don't wanna have to spend hospital prices any more than I do. So I spent a great deal of time yesterday looking up non-hospital-affiliated radiology clinics that were in-network.

I made an appointment with one clinic for Thursday. But I also made an appointment request at a different clinic for Monday morning, just in case they could see me sooner--because I knew this clinic didn't accept Medicare or Medicaid, and were therefore exempt from the requirement of third-party pre-authorization. (Pro-tip: even if you do have Medicare or Medicaid, always try to bypass pre-authorization for diagnostic procedures, especially if you have a particularly high in-network deductible--it's entirely possible that paying out of pocket for a service at an out-of-network provider could cost less than the amount you'd have to pay towards your deductible at at in-network facility. American math.)

THIS MORNING, I woke up at 8am to a phone call from the latter clinic, saying that if I sent them the doctor's prescription, they could pre-authorize the procedure and see me tomorrow. So that's what I did...and then I got an email saying that they couldn't accept a prescription for an MRI with and without contrast because they don't have contrast at that facility. Which is like finally securing a coveted reservation at an elite steakhouse only to find out they don't season their steak or even have steak sauce perfectly reasonable, because not everyone needs contrast, but I do, so that place was out.

But as far as I've been told, Thursday's appointment should go off without a hitch as long as I call EviCore (the pre-authorization middlemen) tomorrow morning to tell them all about the not-hospital that will be giving me a not-hospital-priced MRI, so that they can grant the pre-authorization at long last.

Perhaps if I plead my case and bat my eyes at them real cute-like through the phone, they'll give me some other reason why it's actually not medically necessary for me to know definitively whether or not I have a literal brain tumor I can get seen even sooner than Thursday.

FUNNY STORY THOUGH...

A couple weeks ago I was talking to a friend from church who was going through a lot of the same stuff as I was, and I was like "idk, maybe get your cortisol checked?" and lo and behold, he messaged me back a few days ago saying that he'd found a new doctor and asked him to do just that, and WITHIN A DAY his doctor ordered ALL the labs I'd fought for (serum blood cortisol, low-dose dexamethasone suppression test, 24-hour urine, saliva, etc.) AND an MRI for suspected Cushing's.

And he completed ALL OF THAT within a week.

Although he did have to suffer for quite a while before I floated the possibility of Cushing's, just like my friend Alan had to suffer for years before his own endocrinologists floated the possibility of Cushing's. Still, they both got that MRI the second it WAS floated, without a fight, and I'm genuinely happy for them.

But I can't help wondering how much quicker and easier this whole process would have been for me if I were a man. Or if I was neurotypical. Or if I still had a choice about whether or not to disclose being autistic. But mostly if I were a man.

THIS IS THE END! HERE IS THE HTDIO-ADJACENT CAT VIDEO YOU WERE PROMISED!

I'm fostering my friends' exquisite tuxedo princessfloof for a few weeks. Chevy and Tex are being very accommodating foster siblings, but she's much younger and is used to being the only pet, so naturally it took her a while to acclimate.

But there was one thing she took to immediately: the How to Dance in Ohio fidget spinner.

[brionysea]

what is possessiongate?

several people have asked for a post explaining the possessed mike wheeler theory, so i thought it was about time i made one!

(disclaimer: i didn't originally come up with this idea, but i have thought about it a lot and i made a lot of the connections i'm going to talk about myself)

possessiongate is a theory that vecna is in mike wheeler's head and has been for a while (a year, as of season 4, which is why mike and will talk about that so much even though it doesn't match up with the timeline of will moving away from hawkins). it's not that far off from what everyone knows is going to happen anyway with mike getting vecna'd. the main difference is that this theory argues for mike's actions being directly influenced by that shared headspace, rather than just dying because of it

this is a possible explanation for why mike has been so fickle about whether he's "the original mike" or "the remake" that everyone's been complaining about for the last few seasons; because there's been a long term mind fight going on between him and vecna

foreshadowing

let's look at the first conversation mike had with will that was explicitly about will's possession

mike: you're like a spy now. a superspy. spying on the shadow monster. if you know what he's seeing and feeling... maybe that's how we can stop him. maybe all of this is happening for a reason. will: you really think so? mike: yeah. yeah, i really do. will: what if he realises we're spying on him? what if he spies back? mike: he won't. will: how do you know? mike: we won't let him.

the idea of mike being a superspy is already present here, since mike and will are almost immediately grouped together as spies. will could have talked about himself, as an individual, taking the risk of spying and being a possible liability, but he talked about both of them instead

will tapped into his connection to vecna to get them the "CLOSEGATE" message, and mike's the one who knew will could do that, because it was his idea in the first place. mike is definitively capable of seeing and using that advantage when it's available to him, proving he could fit the role laid out in this conversation

the "crazy together" scene also serves as foreshadowing

mike: sometimes i feel like i'm going crazy. will: me, too. mike: hey, well, if we're both going crazy, then we'll go crazy together, right? will: yeah. crazy together.

will felt like he was going crazy because he was at the beginning of his possession storyline. mike is essentially making a prediction that they'll both get possessed in the future, which will agrees to

mike: el? i've been meaning to tell you something. it's just, being broken up, it's been hard. and... i like that you and max are friends now. it's just, i was so jealous at first, and... and angry. and it's like i wanted you all to myself. and now i realise how unfair that is. and selfish. and, like... i'm sorry. i just, like, i've never felt like this with anyone before... and... you know, they do say it makes you crazy.

mike feeling jealous and angry and possessive about el becoming friends with max doesn't make sense if they're supposed to be his own feelings. mike isn't possessive of el. he doesn't want to hide her in his basement forever. when mike reached out to el over the radio in season 2, he wasn't begging her to come back, he just wanted to know that she was alive. he was fine with the idea of el going somewhere far away and living her life, like she almost did with kali and the ives family. mike doesn't get all prickly when other people pay attention to el or vice versa like he does with will. but if mike can feel what vecna's feeling, and vecna's mad because his plan of isolating and weakening el has started to fall apart, those emotions make more sense

we're meant to presume ("that's presumptuous of you," says max, after which dustin questions if that's a good thing) that what mike's talking about with el is love, and there's only one character who has actually said that phrase: the lady from the police station after jonathan got arrested. she assumed that he did something stupid defending nancy's honour, but that's not what happened. jonathan beat steve up because steve was talking negatively about will and joyce. if love does make you crazy, it's the familial kind, not romantic love

(this is from the same episode as el and mike's conversation — both scenes end with dustin interrupting)

even on a simple relationship level, mike and el's isn't what it appears to be. but once el starts asking what mike means, it becomes really clear that he isn't talking about love at all

el: what makes you crazy? mike: you never... you never heard that term... you know, like the phrase, like... "blank makes you crazy," like the word... el: "girlfriends"? mike: no, no, no, no, no... not girlfriends. el: "boyfriends". mike: no! no, no, not boyfriends either. it's like... it's like a feeling or... el: a feeling...

mike thinks he's going crazy again ("blank" makes you crazy... like possession? like "crazy together"?) because of a feeling ("it's like i feel what the shadow monster's feeling") and it's an independent issue from his love life. we're supposed to think it's about boyfriends or girlfriends but mike says that's not it, and despite his best efforts ("you never say it"), that blank never actually gets filled in

following the timeline of season 2, we know that will's possession wasn't successful. this was directly because of mike's actions and ideas — he didn't let the demodogs find them in the lab by suggesting they sedate will, he came up with the idea to put will in the shed and try to get through to him, and he pulled will out of a possessed state multiple times. but didn't vecna already know that nobody would let will go without a fight? didn't he learn that in the first season? isn't he supposed to be smart? what's smart about trying the same thing twice when he already knows it won't work?

vecna was spying on and trying to get something through will. i think that something was mike. who else was there to spy on? who else was constantly glued to will's side throughout season 2 (creating an association between his character and the concept of possession), always within convenient surveillance range? mike's a pain when it comes to his constant foiling of vecna's evil plans. it would be smart to keep an eye on him

and that would be all well and good, except that season 2 is the one season where our team of good guys won — supposedly — with no strings attached. sure, the bit of the mind flayer that was in will escaped, but after bob's death, there were no more casualties until the jump to the next season. it's exactly what they set out to accomplish. what was the point of spying on mike if vecna didn't even use it? even finding out their location near the end was inconsequential, because el dealt with the demodogs in seconds and they didn't attack the house again. when contrasted with the loss of el in season 1, the loss of hopper in season 3, and the loss of max in season 4 (all of which happened during the final episode and the climax of the overall story — the season 2 equivalent of which would definitely not be the escape from the lab, where bob died), i find the happy ending a bit suspicious

when did mike get possessed?

while inside hawkins lab, vecna made will point out the hub as, vaguely, "important". mike said that vecna's immediate plan was to simply kill the group in the lab and vecna insisted that he was lying. the only person vecna could identify was "my friend, mike" (not joyce, who he would have recognised if all he was drawing on was will's memories and emotions instead of his own knowledge). mike's plan then hinged on going into the tunnels and setting the hub on fire, which was, again, suspiciously successful. they had the fake out of something happening to dustin on the way there, but then nothing actually got in their way, which is very weird and untrustworthy considering how the tunnels reacted to hopper poking around (they could have done something like the vines attacking nancy, robin and steve in the creel house). mike's plan went off without a hitch until he got grabbed by a vine on the way back ("you step on a vine, you're stepping on a bat, you're stepping on vecna")

this sequence of mike getting trapped by the vine, concurrent with el trapping the mind flayer and will getting exorcised, is when i believe the possession began. or shifted, i suppose. will's could have been a trick; the obvious possession that they can feel proud of themselves for seeing through and stopping so that they don't notice the more subtle one. what kind of idiot pulls the same move twice, right?

...ahem. anyway-

the imagery of a vine wrapped around the ankle is similar to max getting grabbed by the ankle in vecna's mind lair (vecna literally being in max's head until she pulled an uno reverse card and walked into his instead), and to el getting grabbed by the ankle in the cabin shortly before losing her powers. these are both internally supernatural situations. what happened to mike in the tunnels didn't look like will getting possessed, but that doesn't necessarily mean there wasn't something else going on. mike's stuff has always been more subtle. vecna wasn't able to stop mike from making connections and urging people into action and generally getting in his way, so he needed a newer, smarter approach in removing this annoying obstacle — he needed to use mike's best qualities (his intelligence, his intuition, and his tenacity) against him

there's about a month between mike going into the tunnels and seeing el at the snow ball. like will said, vecna leaves possessed people alone until they can do something for him, and then they're activated. i believe they showed us this moment for mike

the rest of his friends have left (will suspiciously pushed into leaving by mike), he's sitting alone, and then he perks up after seeing el walk in

mike's behaviour at the snow ball doesn't really make sense. last time el tried to kiss him (before she left to close the gate), he froze up, not leaning in, until hopper called her away. there was mike's speech to will in the shed before that, where he most likely realised something about the nature of his own feelings. now he's suddenly pushing will away and obsessing over el? it's weird and inconsistent and not in line with what you'd expect from him. yes, mike's a wheeler and wheelers are prone to fits of conformity, but mike also started a public fight with troy for saying something homophobic when he was 12 and he never takes his parents' conformity advice seriously. he thinks being a weirdo is a good thing. this is strange. especially when you remember the mind flayer creepily watching over all of them while mike danced with el

i often see this stuff being interpreted as just mike dealing with growing up and figuring out his sexuality, and that would be believable enough if this was just a coming of age story, but it's not. it's a supernatural horror coming of age story. things like will's ptsd and max's depression are turned into grandiose supernatural threats, but mike dealing with his sexuality in a heavily homophobic era (which we saw as early as season 1 could lead him to suicide) isn't? that would be a colossal waste of potential, and i honestly can't see this show passing up an opportunity like that for a main character to take the more grounded route instead

how would a show like stranger things present forced conformity through a character like mike, who's too headstrong to just conform on his own? by taking away his agency in his own life

why did mike get possessed?

there's the stalker song that played at the snow ball. every move you make, every step you take, i'll be watching you, and so on. while it's been linked to vecna's obsession with will, the lyrics themselves started playing over mike while he creepily stared at el from across the room, languishing in the shadows (what if the shadow monster spies back), as he tends to do. the song playing over mike and el talking, dancing, and kissing, holds the promise of mike and the romantic relationship that's officially forming between him and el being used to keep tabs on her, just like will was used to keep tabs on mike

(if you really want to tie it back to will — because these three character arcs are obviously connected — let's play with a hypothetical for a second: say you're vecna, and you want will on your side. how do you make that happen? you failed to take him twice because his friends and family refuse to give up on him. so how do you make him give up on them? on his life? simple! by making him think that mike, the person who makes him feel like he's not a mistake and who makes him want to keep fighting, isn't an option for his future anymore)

will: and if she was gonna lose you, i... i think she'd rather just get it over with quick. like ripping off a band-aid.

(needless to say, a year-long possession streak during which he's been slowly killing mike's spirit is not "getting it over with quick". mike just getting vecna'd definitely wouldn't be enough for what he's trying to accomplish. if you die that way it's over in a second. will plainly lays out that mike is his weakness — or his strength, which is kind of the same thing — and that going after mike slowly is the best way to get to him. vecna has been in will's head. vecna knows this)

el is arguably at her worst when she's existing in relation to mike as a romantic interest. she consistently does stuff like spy on her friends, lie to mike for months, physically harm max, exclude will, slam doors in hopper's face, and ditch all of her friends in the name of her relationship with mike. el never apologises or even takes responsibility for her actions. mike has done things wrong too, but in accordance with heteronormative gender roles of the time (watched any 80s films recently? the girl sits there and looks pretty, because she's a prize to be won, while the boy chases after her and puts in all the effort), el is blameless while mike gets all the blame. it consumes her character, makes her harder to watch, and most importantly, it makes her easier to kill

the romantic relationship between mike and el clearly had a negative impact. it isolated them, it turned them into brainless little teen drama machines, and both of their individual characters and the group's shared ability to strategise and make plans together took a drastic hit because of it. that's very convenient, isn't it? one season prior to mike and el becoming official, el was a powerhouse who shut a gate right in vecna's face and mike was constantly getting in vecna's way. then they got their happy ending of finally kissing at the snow ball and almost immediately after, they became so annoying and distracting in their relationship that it derailed from anyone in the group attempting to make good plans

by the big planning point of season 3 (the argument in the cabin), not only is mike too distracted by the romantic drama of juggling his relationships with will and el at the same time to come up with an effective plan, but no one else is taking him seriously either. they brush him off and ignore him the second the instant-regret-love-confession (which was probably a result of vecna's meddling, since mike usually keeps his feelings very close to his chest instead of airing them out in front of a room full of people) derails the argument, even though he was really the one making the most sense. mike was neutralised and they moved forward with a stupid decision instead of letting him talk them out of it, which butterfly-effected into the group going on the run from the cabin and everything that happened in the battle of starcourt — hopper "dying" (which is the reason why hopper, el, will, mike, jonathan, joyce and murray weren't in hawkins for season 4), the catalyst for max's death (and therefore the catalyst for the downfall of hawkins), and el losing her powers. that is very convenient for vecna. some of his biggest obstacles are out of the way and for the first time, the good guys only kinda win. that's a huge difference from season 2, and it serves as a stepping point towards their first complete loss in season 4. for a villain who's actively being framed as this manipulative mastermind, i can't believe that was just a series of unlucky coincidences

this approach continues to work into season 4, with mike being shipped off to california to make el cry and to make will miserable while all three of them aren't allowed to directly interfere in the main plot. all the drama mike caused is very suspicious in the season where vecna essentially feeds on teen angst (i wrote a very lengthy deep dive into season 4 mike a while ago, which you can read here). mike is activated to make his first few days in california weird for everyone, to push el back into the monster/superhero mentality (which vecna uses to demoralise her when they face each other), and during mike's monologue (not to be confused with vecna's monologue from two seconds earlier... wait-), which successfully distracted el and kept her from saving max

the characters picking up on it

jumping into season 3 after the snow ball, el and mike are kissing while listening to music again. the music is explicitly mike's pick this time, and it's all about "never surrendering" and "i can't fight this feeling anymore". while this does reflect on his tenacity and inability to give up and how existing in the world when you're different is a constant fight, most songs that feature in stranger things have a deeper meaning (especially when they're diagetic like this), and the music is telling us that mike (who is immediately acting like a different person) is fighting something

hopper (the person joyce went to about will's possession, the person who realised will was "talking without words", and the person who heard the music mike was blasting in the cabin for six months) says that something's wrong with mike, that mike's relationship with el isn't normal, and casually talks about killing mike for "corrupting" el. that's an insane reaction to a teenager being mildly obnoxious, but a fairly reasonable one to the villain — a grown man with a disturbing habit of targeting teenagers and pre-pubescent children — inserting himself into hopper's teenaged daughter's relationship which solely consists of them making out

mike doesn't understand what's happening to him, but he knows something is. his feelings get dismissed too often to make anything of it in season 3, but he gets the chance to think a bit harder about it in season 4, after a lot of prompting from will. usually when mike's freaking out about something, he paces until someone snaps at him to cut it out, but in season 4 he spends most of his panic sessions totally frozen. it's visually different from anything he's had to personally deal with before. he spends a lot of time wondering why he didn't say a mysterious "thing" (which he never explicitly spells out) during his fight with el. that fight was setting up for mike's monologue, which distracted el and let vecna open the gates. mike didn't say what he wanted to say, whatever that was, because he couldn't. he wasn't in control, and you can tell by how confused and off-kilter he sounded while trying to explain his reaction to the roller skate incident

subconsciously, though, mike is aware of what's happening. he's dropped a lot of hints about it ("why am i the bad guy?" is my personal favourite) and when jonathan subtly questions this habit ("maybe it's hidden in the code somehow?" "what you just said makes no sense"), mike shows that he has no clue he's doing it

jonathan actually figured out what was happening to mike back in season 3, almost immediately after setting foot in the basement, because mike exclusively speaks in code and jonathan's great at hearing the things people aren't saying. this is probably the reason why they got put in the same group for season 4

jonathan seemed to think that mike's consciousness was gone or heavily suppressed for a while (which is a kind of funny but mostly sad explanation for all that glaring people have been making jokes about — he wasn't glaring at mike, he was glaring at what he thought was the thing that had either killed or was holding mike hostage while wearing his face), but when mike kicked up a fuss while trying to protect el instead of being cool with needless death and murder like the rest of the flayed (who tried to kill nancy and jonathan, like, yesterday), jonathan looked surprised and realised he was wrong

from there jonathan protected mike, physically shielding him from the flesh flayer right along with will (and actually leaving will for a second to make sure he could pull mike back) when it burst into the cabin. nancy and will were talking about the flayed turning into monsters, and jonathan saw that happen to a guy from the hawkins post, so he was probably concerned about mike (this weird anomaly who's flayed but somehow still himself and hasn't transformed into a killer blob monster, for whatever reason) getting too close to the killer blob monster that absorbs flayed people into its creepy hive mind. jonathan also didn't mention what he'd realised about mike to anyone, since el was looking for the flayed so that they could kill them ("maybe i'll just kill mike," says hopper), and nancy was totally on board with that (jonathan gave mike a very weird look when this came up). everyone ganged up on mike very quickly during the argument, so i can see why jonathan would be hesitant to share his findings with the class and risk endangering mike (there's a queer allegory in here somewhere...), whether that's through his friends or vecna doing something to him once the secret's revealed

will and his Upside Down Compass Powers had spider-sense moment after spider-sense moment while in close proximity to mike in season 3: sitting next to him at the cinema, watching him walk away with el on the hill, and while mike's running up to him outside castle byers. will said that he "didn't want to believe it was anything at first" while laying this sequence of events out as indicative of something he didn't want to be true, which is strikingly similar to max's initial denial over billy being possessed

the things will's sensing don't make sense if they have nothing to do with mike. either will's range is huge, spanning all the way to the steelworks while sitting in the cinema with mike (there was a long panning shot across hawkins to show how far away the thing will's supposedly reacting to is), or will's range is so tiny that it takes vecna personally showing up for will to realise that the mind flayer is trying to kill jonathan and nancy a few floors above him while he's in the hospital waiting room. it can't be both

will only noticed what was happening in the hospital when vecna took control of the flesh flayer. that could easily reflect on will getting spooky feelings around mike but refusing to put the pieces together because, in his own words, he would fall apart without mike. it's easier to believe mike's weird behaviour is just about a girl rather than because the man who ruined will's life is in mike's head

lucas, mike's dustin-assigned best friend, questions and doesn't understand mike's behaviour several times in season 3 (he did that a lot before too, but that's a different brand of Mike Mysteries). the rest of the party (excluding el at first, although she gets there when mike acts weird on the phone and blatantly lies to her) are disappointed, confused, and angry because of how he's acting too. lucas seemed to suspect something when he reunited with mike in max's hospital room, showing the same intuition as when he knew something was wrong with max (reminder: the thing wrong with max was that vecna was in her head)

el seems to fully pick up on and question why mike's so different once they're both in lenora and not distracted by acting fake, in a way she wasn't allowed to before ("but friends don't lie" "yeah, well, boyfriends lie"), because intentionally upsetting her and belittling her as much as mike does at that point is weird behaviour for him. he's naturally gentler with both el and will than he is with most other people, so for him to upset them that much is extremely bizarre

dustin: i told you, joyce has this new telemarketer job. she's always on the phone. mike won't stop whining about it. max: yeah, but this phone's been busy for, what, three days now? that's not joyce. no way. something's wrong. nancy: she's right. it can't be just coincidence. it can't be. whatever's happening in lenora is connected to all of this. i'm sure of it.

el has very good hearing and a habit of hearing mike whether he wants her to or not ("you do realise we can still hear everything you're saying, right?"), so she most likely heard mike and will's argument at rink-o-mania (especially since she heard angela's group perfectly seconds after the boys walked away). a few days later, after vecna told nancy to send el a message, el went into the void and heard dustin say that mike's actually been calling will an annoying amount but wasn't able to get through, which mike definitely didn't mention when will blamed mike for never calling. el knows this is weird because mike told her that he called her every night for almost a year with no shame, and the rink-o-mania fight was so ridiculously public and coupley that it wouldn't make sense for mike to suddenly be holding back. from there, prompted by max and nancy's refusal to accept the easy answer, el figured it out, just like when she knew that billy was "wrong" while max refused to see it

why didn't anyone notice sooner?

this is kind of a frustrating question for me. the real answer is that mike simply needs to be in trouble for season 5 to work (which is why characters like joyce and dustin are being kept away from mike for large stretches of time when he's acting strange — they're too intelligent and too active to not figure it out and help him too early). the answer that makes me angry is that mike wheeler is haunted by double standards. nobody would ever leave will alone to fight off possession for a year (and counting — there's probably going to be a time skip in season 5) like the characters who know about this have done with mike. it's impressive that he can hold out for as long as he has, but that doesn't mean he doesn't need outside help (although i suspect that's the point)

it seems to have something to do with the superspy angle. anything mike knows, vecna knows. if mike doesn't know about the possession then vecna won't be expecting to have to guard things from him as closely as he would from someone like will, who's consciously aware of the connection between them while mike's operating on subconscious knowledge. it can be turned into a tactical advantage, which is kind of mike's whole thing. as long as the others are careful with what they let him know, this might be the key to getting max back and/or killing vecna for good. mike did say a connection like this could be how they stop him, and it looks like he's going to keep working with will to do that, paying off the "crazy together" prediction

hopper knows something about mike that he promised to share with joyce (and the audience) during their date. joyce didn't show up and it still hasn't happened yet (although they keep reminding us of it). whatever information hopper has might explain why he didn't do anything in the six months between season 2 and season 3, if he really did figure out what was happening to mike that quickly

jonathan also promised to tell nancy everything, which probably has something to do with what he noticed about mike during their side quest. jonathan witnessed the monologue, so he has a solid understanding of how this specific style of possession works now. he also has the motivation to actually do something about it after finding out that will is in love with mike and couldn't handle losing him. jonathan told will that everything would be okay, and making things okay for will means fixing mike

for everyone else, mike's weirdness is predominantly blamed on his relationship with el (in an "annoying shallow teen romance, look no deeper, nothing to see here" way), or his feelings for will, if you're looking at it from a fandom perspective. but both mike and dustin call that bullshit. mike calls the way max frames everything about his motivations and his... whole character, really, around his romance with el, bullshit (max also deliberately does this when lucas tells her he knows something's wrong, obviously deflecting from the real issue). there's a not insignificant amount of categorically defining mike as not just a love interest, because that diminishment of his character is what the writers (and vecna) are banking on to hide what's really going on with him, but they also have to include enough clues that it doesn't come out of nowhere

mike prioritises other people over himself as a defence mechanism against his abandonment issues (because his family stopped paying attention to him around the time holly was born, making him think he needs to offer people something so they won't lose interest in him and leave him behind). the narrative can't validate that by presenting his habit of framing himself as someone who's useful and needed solely because he's the therapist friend, not because he's a person who's deeply cared for and deserving of help, like it's objectively true, so they're going to have to challenge it instead. saving him from possession, where the only thing to gain is mike's continued existence, would be a good way of accomplishing that

the timeline

mike is making things difficult by having a ridiculous amount of willpower, so it takes a bit of work to figure out when he's mike and when he's not mike. i don't have the whole thing figured out but sometimes, he just tells you!

this is from when he first entered the tunnels. nothing's messed with him yet, so he's at 100%

in early season 3, hopper says that mike has spent every single day for the past six months in the cabin with el, implicitly ignoring his friends (you know, the people he would and has jumped off a cliff for? those friends?). mike, from what the others have said about his behaviour, has spent those six months losing. "he likes it cold", and the months between december and july are mostly cold ones in this show's setting. this lends significance to season 3 taking place in the summer

hopper tells mike that something's wrong, but because he lied to get mike into the car (away from el) in the first place, mike doesn't listen to him and calls him crazy (you know, the thing joyce and will and nancy and even mike himself have been called whenever they had an out there theory? a theory that always turns out to be right?). hopper's scheme is successful in granting el and mike some space, but it's not until will gets sick of mike not acting like himself that mike actually snaps out of it. vecna was distracted by the other flayed at the time, as he'd recently put his plan of building the flesh flayer into action, as well as by what el and max showing up meant for his first direct interaction with el since she lost her memories. he was probably underestimating mike after six months of success and failing to pay him much attention, which continues into the next episode. the sauna test demonstrates mike's ability to fight back (and possibly hints towards the existence of some kind of mental shield or ability to hide, since billy had no idea what they were planning and even vecna looked surprised when mike snuck up on him with the bat), and confirms that mike and el both fighting for each other is vital to their survival

i believe mike is in control a lot more often for the rest of the season, but he still has to deal with the consequences of what vecna's already done through him. mike's definitely himself in the season 3 epilogue (i think he reclaimed something during the battle of starcourt, particularly when literally escaping from the mind flayer with max and el's help), but he cares about el's feelings and the whole situation is super confusing from his perspective ("i don't really remember... what did i say, exactly?"), so the getting back together thing kinda just... happens to him. mike's unresponsiveness during the kiss is especially disturbing in the context of this theory, where he's literally had no agency throughout their entire relationship (not that i'm blaming el; she doesn't know yet, she's still young and very sheltered so probably not that informed about consent, and she's been tricked by this whole thing too — their makeout sessions at the start of the season were difficult to watch for a reason — but like. yikes.)

mike immediately gets called "a shitty knock-off" when he gets to california, where he's at a disadvantage because of the 70/30 split with vecna ("he's been telling us his plan this whole time"). vecna having to focus on mike at first explains the inconsistent pattern of the murders in hawkins that robin couldn't decipher. vecna backed off once el left to get her powers back, and mike immediately did the most mike thing ever: got into a verbal sparring match with government agents ("so, what, we're just supposed to trust that you're the good guys? whoever you are?")

will reminds mike of who he is in the painting scene, because things have gotten so muddled in mike's head that he doesn't know anymore. this draws a parallel to mike's speech in the shed when will was possessed

mike reunites with el ("is it really you?" "it's me. i'm here" — that's literally the most loved one fighting possession dialogue i've ever heard). there's vecna's ridiculously long monologue, during which he confirms the whole mastermind angle, then he tells el to pay attention right before mike gets activated again to give the other monologue. mike was at 100% this time, plus he got a boost from actually eating something for once ("too much flavour awesomeness can't overpower your battery, can it?" — eat your damn food, michael), and will's speech convinced mike that happily accepting affection and fighting for his own existence is worth it, but they're still in a pizza freezer ("he likes it cold"), and vecna has enough power to open a mega-gate

there's a whole lot of reluctance in the performance, so mike is clearly fighting it anyway (he talks about "you have to fight" and "can you hear me?" and "i'm right here" a lot — i like the part where he says he's not scared of el, because after she realised what their relationship has actually been like for him, she must have felt guilty for being part of his choice getting taken away), but the distraction still works. mike goes back to normal (relatively) after el temporarily pushes vecna out of his and max's heads (using these two specifically to hurt el was revenge for when they worked together to protect her during the battle of starcourt), and from the two day time skip, we find out that el has stopped talking to mike. she probably realised what will did all the way back in season 2: vecna can spy through mike

[httpskarmaco-writes]

Body Appreciation (Swapped)

Summary: Owada starts feeling insecure about himself and his surgery scars. But his boyfriend, Ishimaru, helps him clear those thoughts.

Paring: Ishimaru Kiyotaka x Oowada Mondo

Type: Comfort

Content Warnings: Trans (FtM) Owada headcanon, fluff and angst, body dysphoria, MLM

Owada was staring at himself in the mirror after just getting out of the shower. He was in his signature black sweatpants but was topless, revealing some scars he has obtained over his years of gang fights and an incident he isn't too fond of remembering. Though 2 scars stood out from the rest and they were just under his pecs; his top surgery scars. He got them not too long ago, maybe say 7-8 months ago he was finally eligible to get the surgery and thus went through with it. It made him feel a lot better with his self image finally not having breasts but that still didn't stop thoughts from popping in from time to time, just like right now. Owada kept staring at himself, feeling unsure about his scars; yeah they looked badass but each scar has a memory and those scars will always remind him of what he used to be which didn't help. Maybe flexing would help? Owada always took pride in his masculine appearance, especially his muscles he worked hard for. So Owada started flexing his muscles to himself in the mirror to make him feel better but to no avail. He just sighed and flipped his arms to the side while walking back to his bed, flopping on that as well face first.

Ishimaru, his partner, was sitting and reading a book next to where Owada flopped down. He was wearing his nightwear as well; just some shorts and that blasted diamond shirt Owadas brother, Daiya, gifted him which didn’t fit quite right and slid off a shoulder slightly. He looked over at Owada and gave a concerned face. "Hey Mondo…what's wrong bro?" Ishimaru spoke, closing his book after marking his place and setting it down. Owada lifted his face and looked at his boyfriend for a second before setting his face back down. "Nothin'...'s stupid anyway.." Owada's words were muffled as he responded to him.

"Don't say that! Your emotions matter a lot, Mondo! So please, tell me what's wrong? If you are comfortable sharing, of course." Ishimaru exclaimed. He didn't like Owada hiding his emotions; he knew he went most of his life masking them due to insecurities. Owada let out a huff and sat up, looking at Ishimaru. Owada was hesitant, as already stated, he was terrible at speaking about his emotions; he always felt vulnerable talking about them and with being a gang leader, being vulnerable is the last thing to do and especially around people you don't know well. But Owada knew Ishimaru well, he was someone he knew he could trust just like his own blood, someone who’s been there for him and didn’t just see him as a terrifying gang leader…hell, Ishimaru scares him!

"It's just fuckin'...what's da' word? Body dysphoria yeah yeah…dat'.." Owada spoke quietly, crossing his arms in a defensive way to show that he's obviously not all for talking about this. Ishimaru frowned, moving closer to Owada, "Why's that, Hun?" Ishimaru spoke gently, trying to not accidentally provoke Owada since his tone in the past has accidentally triggered some unwanted emotion. Owada became flustered and embarrassed, not because of Ishimaru's tone but because of him using a nickname; Owada has never been good at expressing affection, always yelling out of anger just habit, but he had an even harder time receiving it. No matter what, it always embarrassed the hell out of him whenever affection was brought into the conversation. "Ishimaru, again with da' pet-name?...Yer makin' us sound like an 80 year old couple man." Owada spoke with a red face, not making eye contact with Ishimaru. "I thought you liked it?" Ishimaru chuckled. He thought it was cute that Owada could still get this easily embarrassed by a simple word but again, Ishimaru easily cries at the slightest amount of affection himself so he can't talk much.

Owada glared at him with a 'you know what I mean' look which just caused Ishimaru to chuckle again. "Alright alright…but you still haven't answered my question Mondo; What's with body dysphoria? You seemed fine a minute ago flexing in the mirror?" Owada sighed, shrugging before responding to Ishimaru, "I don't know…just don't like how the surgery scars remind me of who I used ta' be…." Ishimaru nodded, remembering how Owada always said scars carry memories so it made sense Owada would feel like that looking at that. Before Ishimaru could speak, Owada started talking again. "I just…feel like I'm failin' as a man…I-I mean, I wear all this makeup and keep my hair long…plus my dumbass can't even look at my scars. What dude can't look at a scar!" Owada started tearing up. He always felt like he failed at being a man, especially after what happened with him and his older brother…he ran away like a coward from him just in fear of having to face his older brother for months. He felt like a total failure. "I can't do shit! It's fuckin' stupid! I feel weak all da' damn time! I-I bet my gang views me the same…especially after that incident happened…" Owada just broke down at this point, a side Ishimaru rarely seen. Ishimaru frowned at Owada, he felt sad knowing Owada was upset at something, especially something that was out of his control. Ishimaru put a hand on Owada’s shoulder and began to speak,

“Hey, listen…you aren’t any of those things Mondo.” Ishimaru gave Owada’s shoulder a reassuring squeeze but to also get Owada’s attention which worked. “You must be crazy to think that because all I see is a handsome, strong man when I look at you. You shouldn’t let anything make you feel any different about yourself.” Ishimaru smiled at Owada, not expecting anything big to come from Owada but in the next second he found himself being hugged tightly by him with Owadas head nuzzled right in the crook of his neck. It happened so fast that Ishimaru didn’t even process it at first until Owada started speaking again, “T-thanks man…I’m glad I have someone like you…” Owada sniffled, hugging Ishimaru closer. Ishimaru smiled wider and hugged Owada back; he was happy to make Owada feel better about himself, even if it was only a little, Owada seemed to be better than what he was. “You’re welcome Mondo..” Ishimaru spoke, nuzzling Owada. After a few minutes of them just hugging, one of them decides to speak up, “How about we start resting? It’s late anyways since you take forever to get ready for anything Owada-” Ishimaru jokes, pulling away from the hug and poking Owadas forehead in a playful manner. Owada sniffles one more time before wiping his eyes and chuckling softly; Ishimaru always knew how to cheer him up, just one of the things Owada absolutely adored about him. Hell even just being with him makes his day 10x better and it was quite obvious too with how much he smiled around him which led to non-stop teasing from his brother, Daiya and a close gang member they consider a younger brother, Takemichi. Owada reached out a ruffled Ishimaru's hair, “Sounds like a good idea, Ishi.”

[slashingdisneypasta]

OK EVER SINCE YOU ANSWERED THE SAD SMARTY-POP EXCERPT, I'VE BEEN THINKING ABOUT DRAGON!TOON PATROL (and princess Poppy *cough*). Now that asks are open, I need to vent these thoughts.

I'm not entirely sure how they'd work in this AU. But all five of these dragons somehow found each other, and have decided its best to stay together. I can't decide if they hang around an abandoned, dilapidated castle or they've got a big cave in the mountains (maybe they could be the reason the castle was abandoned? 👀)

Smartass is the smallest dragon, but that only gives him more incentive to be as tough and viscious possible. It's how he can be the leader of these insane overgrown lizards.

Greasy is a sort of secondary leader, when for whatever reason Smartass isn't available to keep everyone in check. And even has been the mastermind behind some of their raids. One thing is for certain though; His tastes in the fairer sex go beyond scales (ladies? 👀)

Wheezy is the silent, scary one of the group with the best fire breather of them all. Dirty, kind of torn up, and smoke billowing from his mouth all times, this dragon's favorite places to terrorize/raid are tobacco farms (no cigarettes, but he can chew the stuff)

Psycho is the one who gets the most kicks out of striking fear in humans the most. While the others may be busy finding whatever goods that interest them in a village, Psycho can easily be found chasing the villagers.

Stupid, although the strongest and biggest, is the most easily swayed dragon out of them all. You could offer this big lug food, and he'll gladly take the bribe.

To keep with the gang theme, maybe these guys keep a few villages in line? If the people give them what they want, they'll be mostly left alone. (I'm not quite sure. I haven't though of much lore behind this AU 😅)

I'm not sure how Doom could come into play here. Maybe he could be a corrupt king that pays them to do his dirty work like in the Fairytale AU?

I don't have tid-bits for all the dragon boys, but here's one for Wheezy. I imagine that he can do some pretty neat tricks with his fire. Like blowing out certain shapes, or knowing how to control it where it won't burn you, but just leave a very hot tickle. Imagine him showing them off to you 👀

Alright, I wasn't sure if I should have included Poppy in this, but I feel obligated to share my thoughts XD Poppy is a princess who got married off to a prince who treats her coldly (Ben). When the dragons attacked her home, by some circumstance or another, she got taken (I'm not quite sure how yet. Maybe she was trying to be diplomatic and it all went wrong. Maybe it was Smartass just being cruel to the royals. Or maybe it was Greasy's idea because- you know why 🙄 or Psycho felt enamored with her). Either this can go in a classic Beauty and the Beast style, or a angsty/darker route.

Anyways, those are my thoughts! I hope dragon weasels bring you as much joy as they've been bringing me lately XD

DRAGONS!!

Sorry for the late reply, I am finished with Placement but I still have assignments to finish and get before... well, the end of today 😅 Its okay though, I only have 2 left. I am very very excited to hear about dragons!!

First of all- YES to the idea of them causing a castle to be abandoned!! I can only imagine the chaos, but its glorious. These 5 terrifying, mean dragons deciding this place is their new place, and they have some fun with the humans there for a while (By which i mean Psycho and Greasy had fun with them... ) ... but when they escaped, that was fine, now they have the place to themselves! XD

Ahhhh! I love them!! || Smartass being kind of feral?? Like, I bet he's bigger then a human but he's smaller then the other dragons so he's so vicious-- that would be terrifying. I love that! || Greasy... Greasy lemme just quickly remind you I am a Certified monster fucker- || WHEEZY! Okay he is definitely my favourite. I'm imagining gassy, fumy smoke just slipping and rolling uncontrollably outta the corners of his mouth at all times, so he looks monstrous and gross. And just, the fact that you mentioned he'll chew the tobacco!! (Cowboy!!) and also the tricks! XD Yesssss, that's so cool XDD || OF COURSE you are the gremlin dragon, Psycho, of course XD I love this, its so perfect for him. I kindof imagine him to be a more lithe, lizard-like dragon. Creepy to be around, freaky to look at. Genuinely makes the hair on the back of your neck stand up. || Awwww Stupid!! He is my next favourite after Wheezy XDD I wanna feed him so bad!! I wanna make him my huge terrifying dragon friend XD I will take a leaf out of Mrs Bickermans book XD Not Sadie's... though- maybe if I could get Ben- XD

And yes!! Always include Poppy! When in doubt, include her ^^ You knowwww she's canon to me XD And ahhhh! I love all those ideas, I honestly dunno which I like more <3

[moonyasnow]

Apple Skin: pulchritudomania route ideas - Amber

One of the 3 routes available from start

Was originally supposed to be the heir to the fortune of the main de Lucius house. Has a younger, bastard half-brother named Wilhelm who his mother took in to raise as her own despite him being from an affair her husband had. Amber likes his brother, but always thought of him being second to himself.

But when Amber is suddenly diagnosed with a serious life-threatening illness one day, his parents decide it's for the best that Wilhelm be the one to inherit the house, since his parents want Amber to go someplace that could help alleviate the symptoms of his illness and slow its spread. But Amber just sees this as him being disinherited in favor of his younger brother, a bastard he's grown up believing he's better than.

He was always secretly envious of Wilhelm having talents that he didn't, which is why he clung so tightly to the thought that him being older and the legitimate son made him just as good as him, if not better.

He was sent by his parents to move in with Carmine because they're distant cousins.

He treats Snow White like a servant at first.

He's only recently been— in his mind— kicked out of his home, and is refusing to accept that he's no longer a noble lord with servants that keep his room spotless and cater to his every whim.

He's actually quite insecure, and can thus be somewhat of the jealous type. Lowkey a bit clingy.

Slowly over the course of his route, he admits that he always knew deep down that his brother would be the better choice for an heir, and Amber just clung to anything he could to try to rid himself of that insecurity. Since Wilhelm was better than him at so much and Amber always secretly compared himself to him, he felt like he needed his status, and to be the most important person in every room he was in— acting like he's the best even though he feels like the worst— to make up for his impostor syndrome, which is why losing that was so hard on him.

Amber works— begrudgingly— as a sort of gardener/farmer, growing herbs Carmine needs for his medicinal work.

I'm imagining that when Amber first gets his work he hates it, the idea of him, the proud son of a noble line, working, is absolutely absurd. But as the game goes on, he actually becomes very proud of his little vegetable patch, and ends up giving Snow the title of 'assistant gardener' which of course isn't as good as a “””real””” Gardener such as him, but it is a very big deal since Amber hates sharing the spotlight.

Amber also has a soft-spot for Chris, since he believes everything Amber says quite easily, and is the only one who's always liked Amber's crops— what with him having an iron stomach.

I just got an idea for Amber's sickness!

So what if, instead of him currently having a sickness, he got seriously sick with something he could easil have died from just before the start of the game.

I'm thinking plague, honestly.

We know there was plague in the area at the time since Schwatz' half siblings died of it.

Having survived the plague, Amber feels like he shold be invincible now, but his family is incredibly worried. He just caught the plague! Maybe he even caught it as a result of interacting with those royals in a sort of trade deal thing

So now that he somehow miraculously survived, his family want to make sure to move him someplace where his chances of becoming seriously sick like that again are much lower.

Oh, and maybe Amber'd already had plague once before! So then his family also thought 'well then he probably won't catch it again'

So when he catches it again they panic

...And I just got a possible idea for Amber

See, his family owns the mine Smith works in, right?

So then it'd probably cause quite a stir when it's revealed Smith has been stealing from them??

I wanted Smith to be a bigger part of Amber's route anyway, what with their obvious rivalry

Snow comes to see the good in him through the cracks in the haughty, arrogant, ego-maniac noble façade he always clings to. Over time she becomes more and more concerned that his pride and ego, refusing to let his more serious medical issues be treated— and refusing to quit wearing those damn boots that are destroying his feet and ankles— all out of stubborn pride. She does everything she can to get him to treat his body better, saying the better he takes care of his body now, the more time he'll have in the future.

He doesn't listen.

The others tell her to stop trying and that it isn't her responsibility to care for him if he doesn't want to care for herself. But what is she supposed to do?! It hurts so, so much to see him basically punish himself due to his feelings of inferiority that he refuses to talk about, all while he refuses any and all help and advice she tries to give him. She loves him, and seeing him disregard his own life and health, not caring at all about what seeing him in pain does to her, to the people who care about him, destroys her.

Also— since I want Snow's general theme to be learning to stand up for herself and no longer forgive at the drop of a hat, Snow puts up with Amber treating her poorly and she makes excuses for him whenever someone else calls him out on it.

She eventually can't take it anymore and yells at him, then runs away.

The next day she feels horrible about what she did.

But in the end, that was the wake-up call he needed. And he himself realizes just how poorly he's been treating her poorly, and decides to try to change himself to become a better person, someone better for her.

I want this to happen around 55% of the way through.

I'm thinking I want a comb to be here somehow.

Like, in the original, the Evil Queen tries to kill Snowhite with a poisoned comb.

And we included the apple in Smith's route and the cord in Chris' route.

Since Schwartz is the antagonist, maybe he gifts the comb to Snow and then plans to take her back to the castle with him after she uses it and falls asleep while home alone?

No no no, that wouldn't work…Schwartz is too impulsive for that.

Oh, maybe Branwen has found out Snow is alive and when Schwartz is going to visit Snow, she tells him to take the comb with him.

Br - 'Figure she'd wanna comb her hair after years not allowed to touch one.'

Sch - '!!! You knew where I was going?'

Br - 'Wouldn't be 'Her Majesty's Eyes' if I didn't. I don't care where she is so long as it ain't here. Just don't blab about it being from me.'

Sch - '…I've never understood you.'

Br - 'Never asked you to.'

Then she walks away.

He wears a pair of boots with very tall heels all the time. They make him the tallest of them all, and is a part of overcompensating for his impostor syndrome

They make his work as a gardener more difficult and even actually hurt his feet in the long run, but he refuses to stop wearing them

Tho at the end of his route, he stops wearing them, even though it means he's shorter than his brother when they renuinte.

This route will probably involve the other LIs berating Amber for treating Snow the way he does at first.

Dance event:

Amber has very high standards for her dancing and complains whenever she accidentally steps on his toes, and eventually decides it'd be easier to just have her place her feet on top of his, and suddenly, they begin an elegant waltz

Chris sits on Amber's shoulders— Amber stumbles around with Chris on his shoulders, trying to prove he can do it while wearing his boots but failing spectacularly because he's carrying an entire other person.

He sneezes and both he and Chris fall backwards into a pond. It makes a HUGE splash.

Amber can play the organ

The bell rings midnight as the dance party ends

As the game progresses, he becomes more and more proud of his little garden patch, it's his after all, he raised all those herbs and crops so of course they're amazing. And I think on his route, Snow maybe suggests that he start growing things like potatos, tomatos and strawberries and such that she could use to cook with, and he ends up proclaiming her his assistant gardener— not as good as an 'actual' gardener such as him, but still very noteworthy for him since he hates sharing the spotlight.

Then at the very end, blushing, he says he might consider promoting her to co-gardener.

Once he grows close to someone, he will do everything he can to assure they are treated with proper respect and given the best treatment possible.

They are his, after all, and of course the things and people that are his should only have the best.

He is a very, very biased man and does absolutely nothing to hide it

At the end of Amber's route, he starts working really, really hard to save up for an expensive engagement ring for Snow, because he'll give her nothing but the best.

He absolutely adores her and is definitely the kind of 'I love my wife' husband who would lavish them with love and gifts, and would want to show them off to everyone.

But this leads to him starting to overwork himself, and he very nearly becomes sick. Snow has to chide him again for not taking proper care of himself.

He agrees to take better care of himself.

The ring he ends up getting her might not be fancy, and he says that he wanted to get her something better, but she's overjoyed and loves it, and that knowing the work he did was so that he could get it for her means more to her than whatever the ring's worth could be, no matter how expensive.

I want Schwartz to be the primary/final antagonist for this route, so at the end Schwartz shows up, determined to take Snow away from Amber. Schwartz is very determined to kill Amber with his bare hands if he has to.

I feel like the primary conflict in his route is going to be him becoming insecure and jealous once he finds out that Snow and Schwartz are really good friends. I think Schwartz could actually start off kinda normal in this route, being overjoyed when he finds out that Snow is alive, reuniting with her and being very affectionate. Then when Schwartz and Amber meet each other during this reunion they both kinda realize that the other has feelings for Snow and become jealous of the other, since she seems to care about both of them.

But in the good end— thanks to a light scolding/pep-talk from Jazz, who is in love with Snow but doesn't think he could ever deserve her and so would never act on it, just wanting her to be happy— Amber ends up realizing his jealousy is just getting in the way of being genuinely closer to Snow, and reveals his insecurities to her while also telling her that he loves her, which is why he got so upset meeting Schwartz, someone who had a lot of history with her whom she could possibly like more than him.

But by now we should now that Schwartz is not the kind of person to think rationally as his first, second, or even third choice, and he does not realize the same thing, and tries to literally kidnap Snow, so obsessed with the fairytal fantasy he's always envisioned for him and Snow to actually consider what she wants, which is to stay with Amber.

In the epilogue, Snow and Amber attend a small ball held by his parents in the neighboring kingdom, where he proudly announces to the whole room that she is his fiancé.

Amber reunites with his parents and Wilhelm, and all three of them note how Amber has really matured in the time he's been away, and he not-so-subtly insinuates that it's mostly thanks to Snow.