#at some point you can't keep blaming the students for failing when it's this many students | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

jishyucks · 4 years ago

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Eight Count ‣ lmh

‣ genre: fluff, enemies-to-lovers, hogwarts!au, I think it's a slow burn

‣ wc: 10.8k

‣ summary: "There's honestly no way Minho would like me. And me of all people would know that." ; in which fate decides to be an ass and make you and Minho dance partners

‣ an: I'm sosososo sorry @ whoever requested this bc of how long it took. I didn't mean for it to be so long but it kept going and uni is to blame bc all of the work :(( but anyways enjoy !!

You feel the beat of your heart quicken as you maneuver through the maze of corridors that you had begun to approach. Time was ticking. The first classes of the day had already started about half an hour ago, and here you were, racing down the stone hallways, tardy and a bit dazed.

It had only been a mere five minutes since you had woken up in the dormitories in pure panic, the realization that everyone had left and you were still cuddled up against one of the pillows in your bed driving you to act quick. You could accuse your housemates of not even bothering to check if you were alive, but you soon decided to place the blame on your body's restlessness and inability to go to sleep when you wished. You wouldn't call it insomnia, but your sleeping patterns weren't normal either.

Approaching the dance room with a quiet sigh of relief, you tug at the wooden door and peek in, hoping that you weren't barging in at such a humiliating time.

Scattered around the rather room, students were paired in twos. Each couple's bodies had been facing each other, hands sitting awkwardly in the other's while their faces were turned towards the dance instructors, Professor Shin and Professor Na. By the look on Professor Shin's face, it was evident that she was about to continue speaking, but the door swinging open had caught her attention.

"Ahh Y/N, nice of you to finally join us," she clasped her hands in genuine excitement, passion towards dance obviously bubbling up inside of her.

You grinned crudely and bowed your head, "W-what should I do, Professor?" Spotting your best friend Felix within the group of students, he tried his best to send you a look of 'we were supposed to be partners'. You shot him an apologetic expression back before turning your attention back to both professors.

After a brief pause in thought, Professor Na's face lit up, "Ah yes! Lee Minho lacks a partner as of now!" Following the eyes of your teacher, they brought your line of sight to the far corner of the room where Minho had been sitting. At the mention of his name, he raised his head to see that everyone had been gaping back at him in what seemed like total silence.

A sharp intake of air through your nose had replicated a gasp, eyes growing wide, "P-pardon?" Out of all the boys in the class, an amount you couldn't keep track of with your fingers, you had to end up with Lee Minho? The human embodiment of a wet sock?

Minho was… unbearable, to say the least. It wasn't that he had done something for you to hate him, which made you seem like a bad person, but in all honesty, your guys' personalities didn't seem to match. He was too arrogant, in your opinion. He has this energy that he carries that really didn't sit well with you, and by the looks of it, the feeling was mutual. It was as if you both ended up on the opposite bc end of everything.

It really doesn't help that you're a Hufflepuff, and he's a Slytherin. For some unknown reason, they always loved teasing the people from your house, though Hufflepuffs chose not to return their actions.

"Mr. Lee is the only student remaining with no partner."

You gulped and slowly approached him, only because your professors had motioned you over to him. If you could protest, you would, but what was holding you back was the attention given by the entire class and the teacher's who seemed too excited for their own good.

Minho pressed his tongue against his inner cheek, eyes lighting up in wrongly-fueled happiness. He hopped from the upper bench and down across from you. You blinked back at him dryly, maintaining calm yet trying to speak to him with your eyes.

Crossing his arms, he leaned forward and smirked, "Why the bitter face? You should relish in your luck for ending up with me."

"Stop talking, dead cells are coming out of your mouth… Luck my as–"

"Now! That everyone has a partner, I'd like you all to stick with these individuals until these classes are finished," Professor Shin had announced. It was quickly followed by groans and whining from many of your classmates. Though you hated your partner and wished you had arrived earlier and paired with Felix, you stood quiet, isolating the anger within your chest.

"And before we begin once again," Professor Na added, "I'd like to point out that this is still a class. We will be holding a class particularly focused on evaluation and your grade will be heavily based on participation over the length of this course." Once again, a chorus of grumbles had flooded the room.

You hear Minho curse under his breath, only because he was now two steps too far into your bubble, "This is utter bullshit."

This time it was your turn to taunt, "Why? Are you scared or something? Can't dance? Can't keep up with everyone?"

Narrowing his eyes, he scoffs, "Oh, shut your mouth, bumblebee. Just wait and see."

ii.

"Get up!" Felix tugged at your arm, voice sounding louder than it actually was. When you hadn't shifted at all in your bed, he sighed and tugged once more, "Y/N!"

"Wha– Felix you're not allowed in here!" You kicked at your blanket and sat up.

"We need to get to dance class," he clicked his tongue, "Let's go~"

"I really don't want to go," you whined, "I'd rather fail a class than hold hands with Lee Minho for an hour and a half." Felix dragged you out of your bed to see that you were already dressed in your robe, only your yellow and black tie had been carelessly tied.

"Wait, did you not change out your clothes from yesterday?" Felix jumped back in exaggeration, alarmed and slightly grossed out. His nose scrunched while he judged you through his eyes.

You glared at him and scoff, "Of course I did, you idiot. And don't act like you haven't done that." You take this as your victory as it was true, Felix had gone two days without changing, and it was a bit nasty considering all the places he's gone to in a day.

This time it was his turn to glare at you, "You shut your mouth! Now let's leave before Snape sees us roaming the halls once class starts."

Minho winced slightly, trying not to let your feet ruin the simple waltz routine that the class had finally run through, "If you step on my foot one more time, I'm shoving yours up your arse." His teeth were gritted in frustration, looking down at you with narrowed eyes.

"Then stop stepping on my feet," you muttered back, hoping that no one else, especially the professors, were hearing you two bicker.

It had only been about two lessons into the class and that amount of times that Minho had purposefully disrupted the routine… as if it were good, to begin with.

The two of you found it difficult to fall in sync with each other. It was always either going too fast or too slow, someone making an 'accidental' mistake, and Minho's favourite, holding your hand and hip with a tight and stubborn grip. It wasn't evident whether he was doing it on purpose, either, but you had pointed it out plenty of times, and he never seemed to loosen them.

"I'm not stepping on them," he pushed you back a little too early in the dance, causing you to stumble on your own feet. This caught the attention of those around you, though they carried on almost immediately after.

"Tell that to my bruised toe," you argued back.

As if you were being blessed, the music had finally come to an end. You promptly retracting your arms and to your body and taking a step back from Minho. He had done the same, going an extra mile to turn away from you and to the professors.

"Perfect! Perfect!" Professor Na's face lit up from excitement, "Now that we have learned this simple routine, next class we are moving on to one of the actual dances done in the Yule Ball as tradition. I hope you all are excited as I am!" Very few students had taken time to let out a "whoop" while everyone else, including you, chose to retrieve their books at the seats.

Felix approached you with a pitiful smile. He already knew what you were going to say, patting your back gently, "So how was it?"

Exhausted, you just shook your head and shrugged. Being partners with Minho honestly had been completely draining for you, mentally and physically, which was unusual as you could often live through such situations without feeling the need to scream.

"What else do you think?"

Felix nodded apologetically and puffed out his cheeks, "Is it as bad as the potions exam we had in fourth year?" He shuddered subtly and led you out of the classroom. Just thinking about that exam made Felix want to claw at his brain. If there was a way to take a particular memory and make it disappear from the chamber of long term memories, he would. Maybe then he'd be able to get a few more hours of sleep.

"Yes," you replied simply. The test was equally as horrible for you, but a test didn't force you to 'create chemistry' with a certain Slytherin.

"You're lying… can't be that bad," Felix laughed lightly.

"Easy for you to say," you sighed.

From behind, you feel someone bump your shoulder and pass by you, "Oops," he snickered, walking backwards to watch your reaction. The only thing he was missing was popcorn.

You turned to see Minho and rolled your eyes, "Ha-Ha, you're so funny, Lee Minho." Such a childish joke and you guys were almost leaving Hogwarts.

Though your reply had been dripping in sarcasm, Minho's wit had dodged it entirely, "Well thank you very much," he bowed, more like a manly curtsy, before he ran off, leaving Felix slightly puzzled at what just happened.

"Don't you see how much of a dingbat he is? He constantly chooses to pick on me just to get a reaction out of me," you utter, "He should be glad I was raised to be patient, if not I'd be hexing him like the world was near its end."

"I see a pattern," Felix hummed. The expression on his face looked as if he had come to an incredible epiphany.

Making a face, you click your tongue, "What do you even mean by that?" What pattern? Green, white, green, white? Minho and his constant need to be the crow to your crops?

Felix patted your head, "You're slow sometimes, you know that right?" He puffed his cheeks up and raised his brows as he looked down at you as if you were a kid.

"Can you just spit it out?" you narrowed your eyes at him before you physically pried his hand off your head.

"Minho does all of that just to get a reaction out of you," Felix presses his lips into a thin line, slowly forming a smile.

Finally arriving at the next classroom, you groaned, "You basically repeated what I said earlier…"

"If you didn't know this already, boys love getting attention from someone they are attracted to," Felix plopped into his seat. You followed right after, "I should know… I'm a boy."

You almost laugh at the tone of his voice. The confidence and the look he gave you to emphasize his statement; was all too funny, "So what you're saying is… Lee Minho has a – and god forbid– crush on me?" Felix nods like a young child, with eyes wide and a tight-lipped smile.

"Bollocks," You burst out laughing, "Felix, I love you, don't get me wrong, but you've never said anything more rubbish in the years I've known you."

"The chances are never zero," Felix put his index finger as if he were saying it in 'a matter of fact'.

You lean forward and sit your chin at your folded forearms. You eyed the teacher as she made her way into the room, "You're right there, Lix, but there's honestly no way Minho would like me. And me of all people would know that." You locked that statement in, feeling your words and emotions contradict.

Right?

iii.

"And then Y/N had the audacity to step on my foot," Minho kicked at the bench across from him, frustration released after what seemed to Seungmin was years of ranting. He didn't mind though, in years of being in the same house as him, he learned how to block him out yet still know what was going on when Minho asked for some sort of reply.

Minho tapped the end of his pencil against his textbook, eyes drifting off elsewhere in the grand hall. Students were clumped at their respective tables, studying for whatever class they had. Minho was trying to do the same, but his state of mind was not in the mood. But he was trying, he was pushing himself, that's what mattered in his opinion.

Turning his attention to Seungmin, who was seated next to him, he jumped, seeing that Seungmin's eyes were wide and directed at him, "What the hell!?"

"What?" Seungmin shifted back forward, facing his own books. In a sense, the scene was hysterical. He acted as if he hadn't done anything wrong or out of the ordinary, but Minho still tried to push an explanation out of him through looks.

"What do you mean what? Why were you looking at me like that?" Minho put his pencil down and closed his book on it.

"I was trying to see something," the boy shrugged and got back to his own work.

Again, Minho furrowed his brows at Seungmin's lack of detail in his response. What in the world was he even trying to do? "Trying to see what? If you don't answer me properly–"

"Okay! Okay!" Seungmin exclaimed a little too loudly, earning looks from other wizards in the room, "You know that saying that if you're in love, you start to glow?"

"No? What type of nonsense are you saying?" Minho scoffed, "Love? Are you sick or something?" Roughly, Minho brought the back of his hand to Seungmin's forehead, which Seungmin had thrown off almost right away.

"You've been talking about Y/N this entire period, you haven't stopped until moments ago," wiggling his eyebrows, Seungmin whispered his reply to Minho, making sure no one would be able to hear him this time.

Minho's face had contorted into one of disgust and confusion, "And?" Where was Seungmin even going with this? He was just relieving stress. It's not that deep.

"My point is that they're the only thing you've been talking about lately," Seungmin scribbles his pen at the top of his paper to get it to work, "Even if I start the conversation, it somehow just shifts to Y/N. Normally I'd be mad, but since you're in love, I'll let it pass."

"In love?" Minho's jaw dropped, a mixture of emotions swimming around inside of him, "In love!?" Trying to find words to perfectly reflect what he was saying, he fails, shoving Seungmin off the bench. Actions spoke louder than words, right?

Seungmin smirked and chuckled, unfazed, "What? Cat got your tongue?" He gets up, dusting his robe off before sitting back down, "It's because I'm right, aren't I?"

Minho gulps, "Will you quit it? You're…"

"I'm…?"

"You're confusing me. Quit it," Minho huffs, gathering all his things as he was planning to return to the dormitories. This was a different way of playing with emotions. There was a zero per cent chance that he liked you, or worse, loved you. That word was way too strong, dangerous like amortentia.

"I take that as a yes!" Seungmin stood his ground, just letting out a genuine laugh.

Minho held a finger up at Seungmin, who still laughed, unbothered. He didn't like you. And if he did, it wasn't wrong to do so. It was an ordinary mortal thing to have feelings. But that didn't matter right now because he didn't like you, not even a tiny crush.

But that slight state of unfamiliar panic in his heart says otherwise.

iv.

The muscles in your arm were aching from the horrible fact that Minho had been purposefully letting his arm go limp while he was holding your hand, which somehow led to you holding up his arm with your arm. You frowned at him, tempted to let your arm fall in the middle of the routine.

"Can you actually put in some effort?" you whispered through gritted teeth. Squeezing Minnho's hand, you directed a look of annoyance that only returned with an amused look. Underneath his robe, you could tell he had been intentionally dragging his feet, causing the both of you to slowly hold those partnerships behind you up.

"I'm not wasting energy on this," he shrugs quietly, "It's ridiculous."

"What don't you find ridiculous?" you rolled your eyes, "You Slytherins and the lack of interest in anything but yourselves. Where's the excitement in that?" No, you didn't want to generalize the entire Slytherin population, especially since you had family members from that house, but you knew exactly how to rev up Minho's engine. Just by the way his face twisted, you knew damn well you hit the right spot.

"Shut your mouth before I spin you a little too hard…" he said a little bit louder, "I don't find it ridiculous, I just find that us being partners is ridiculous… who in this entire school would want to be partners with you?" Before you could even reply, he had caught you, "That's not from your house."

"Jokes on you, I know plenty of people who would be partners with me," you scoffed, and it was true. There was Jisung who had somehow been sorted into Gryffindor, Hyunjin and their seniors, Bang Chan and Changbin. And there was Jeongin, who was a Ravenclaw. You could list a handful more, but that's beside the point.

"Silence is deadly," he stifled a laugh which had driven you to 'accidentally' stumble over your own feet. This caused him to stumble himself, only he wasn't prepared for it, "I'm blaming you for ending up being my partner. I was hoping someone else would've entered the room. But no, it had to be you."

"You're blaming me? For this?" You shake your head out of disbelief, not noticing that your voice had gone louder. You were catching the attention of those around you and the professors at the front of the room, "You could have found a partner you wanted in the first place but you probably decided to stay back and wait for someone to go up to you. No one wanted to be partners with you, which is why you ended up alone in the first place."

Minho's eyebrows furrowed, eyes almost on fire at what you had just said, "You know what?!"

Before he had been able to continue the banter, Professor Shin had cleared her throat. The glares that they both were sending your way had caused the both of you to stop with the squabbling, "Y/N, Minho, I know we've never talked to the two of you about your constant bickering, but it is simply interrupting the atmosphere of my classroom."

Taken aback, the both of you had stumbled over each other's feet, falling to the ground and causing a domino effect among the rest of the students.

Flustered, you turn to Minho, "That was all your fault, Lee Minho." You huffed and attempted to get up, failing once you noticed that Minho was practically lying on your leg.

"Oh be quiet," he rolled his eyes and dusted himself off, "That was all you! You and your two left feet." The rest of the room was silent, regardless of the incident. All ears and eyes were on the 'love birds,' not entirely sure whether or not they should blame you both on what had just happened.

Sliding out from underneath him, you scoffed, "Don't speak so highly of yourself, Minho."

Minho cackled, "Highly? Of myself?!"

"Stop this instant!" Professor Na had finally mustered up the courage to intervene, anger bubbling in his stomach, "Enough!" The two professors began helping the students up, scolding both of you as they did.

"Five points deducted from your respective houses," Professor Shin said sharply, "And you both are now in charge of polishing the floor every Friday for the following three weeks."

"But professor–"

Minho was cut off, "That, or ten points off for your houses…" And without another word, you both chose to polish the floors after all classes were done for the day.

Day one of polishing the floors was practically the most difficult. Not only did the professors restrict using magic to finish the chore, but the overall idea of doing something alongside Minho aggravated you, which was why you hated dancing with him so much. The comments he'd make, the taunting looks he'd give you, the jokes that were obviously uncalled for, they all were honestly bringing you to the point of near insanity.

At first, both of you had decided to start off on the same side, almost the same corner. But the moment you noticed Minho constantly glancing your way in the corner of your eye, you decided against it, "How about I start at that end."

"Whatever floats your boat," he mumbles, "I don't care."

The tone in his voice hadn't matched yours, which you assumed was polite enough not to spark some type of that energy in him, but it did.

"Whatever," you make your way to the other end, sliding your robe off on the way. You let it hang off one of the benches, making sure it wasn't touching the floor. You rolled up your sleeves and started polishing the further end of the room, a bit relieved that Minho wasn't hovering anywhere within your line of sight. It was better that way.

The second day, you were hoping that you could get through a period of cleaning without hearing Minho's ungodly voice. He had been moving back and forth from one corner to the other, feet squeaking seemingly endlessly against the floor. You wished that the volume of the music could be turned up louder.

"I'm doing more than you are," Minho pointed out. You turned to find that he was standing in the middle of the room, hair messy and beads of sweat lining his hairline. His collar was out of place, and his sleeves were rolled up to his elbows just as yours were. Did he, for some reason, look attractive, or was it the lack of light in the room? Probably the latter.

"What do you mean you're doing more than I am?" you feel your eyebrows knit together in confusion, "I'm doing the same amount of work as you." And you were, but you were working just a bit slower than he was. He had probably sped through his area with the idea that the sooner you both finished, the sooner you were able to leave.

"Just hurry up," he groaned. Minho dragged his feet over to a lone stool, pushing it against the wall before plopping into it. The music continued to play, drowning out the shuffle noises of his feet.

"No," you replied, keeping your speed consistent. It wasn't like you wanted to stay longer. It was the fact that Minho couldn't leave until you were finished that was making you act this way. Maybe if he did his job well, he wouldn't be sitting around doing nothing.

Tile by tile, you continued to carry out the chore given to you, not paying mind to the pair of eyes that were burning holes into your back. You ensured that the areas you had worked on were basically spotless, reflection or not, you assumed that shiny meant clean.

Minho had been humming along to the somewhat catchy tune, foot tapping to pass the precious time he believed you were wasting. Nonetheless, he leaned back and sighed, hoping you could finish in time, so he had time to nap before dinner.

"Why do they even need classes for dancing?" He sighed out. At first, you weren't quite sure if he was speaking to you or if he was just thinking out loud, "I feel like we'd be fine either way…" You turn to look at him, seeing that he was already staring at you down.

"I mean it's going to look nice at the Yule Ball,"

You replied.

"Yeah but not everyone's going… it's a waste of time," Minho had a point, yet you still found it somewhat amusing that the school would want to organize such things.

"I don't see why you don't just skip class if you find it a waste of time," you moved onto another spot and sighed, "No one's stopping you."

"Yeah but who'd be your partner then?"

Not knowing how to react to his question, you keep quiet. Minho decided not to follow up on the problem, thinking that he had said something out of the ordinary.

The sun had reached the horizon when you finished your portion of the room. You stood up to stretch, hearing the joints of your knees and back pop out of exhaustion. It was satisfying to see the difference between the used, scruffy floor and the clean, polished floor.

"Okay Lee Minho I'm finished," without taking a glance at the boy, you made your way over to the record player. You lifted the needle off and picked the record up, slipping it into its sleeve. It didn't occur to you that Minho hadn't shifted in the past thirty minutes, silence filling the room because you turned the music off.

"Minho?" Finally turning to him, you found him sleeping with his head sat back against the wall. His mouth was wide open, practically becoming a makeshift trap for bugs that happened to be flying around. The rest of his body was limp, legs spread out beneath him. It was surprising that he hadn't fallen off yet.

You walked up to his sleeping figure and laughed lightly, wishing you had a camera to capture this moment. It would've been great blackmail. Maybe then he'd start being nice to you. Naturally, your eyes followed the slope of his nose, then to the two front teeth that stuck out from underneath his top lip.

He had bunny-like features, and you didn't mean that in a wrong way. His face was still sculpted nonetheless. Anyone with eyes would have to admit that he was attractive.

"Done staring at me yet?"

You screamed and jumped back, pressing your hand up to your chest as if to calm you down. Looking back at Minho, you find that his eyes were still closed, yet a smirk had replaced his gaping mouth. The number of curse words that threatened to leave your mouth was countless, the embarrassment creeping up to your cheeks. He finally lifted his head to look at you, eyes still a bit droopy from his nap.

"I-I wasn't staring at you," you denied, shaking your head a bit too aggressively, "Well I was… but because I was laughing at how foolish you just looked."

An offended look surfaced Minho's face, scowling at you as he stood, "I have this feeling that you're lying, bumblebee… Anyways, this is where I leave. Finally, after years." He shook his rolled-up sleeves so that the cuffs slid back to his wrists. You let him leave without another word from the two of you, still in a bit of shock at what just happened. You knew he was never going to let you forget that.

You slumped next to Felix as dinner was being served, an expression almost as heavy as your posture. He looked down at you, debating whether or not he should interrupt the mini montage you were probably playing through your head.

"I want to ask you how the cleaning today was but I think I already know just by looking at you," he stated, sliding a piece of roasted chicken your way, "Unless you do want to speak about it. Just eat and the day's over."

You gave him a grateful smile and gestured for him to eat too, eyes lighting up slightly, "I'm actually not tired from cleaning that stupid dance room, but it's just… this thing that happened. It was beyond embarrassing."

Felix snorts and stuffs his cheeks with food. His words came out muffled as he still chose to reply with a full mouth, "What happened this time?"

You glanced towards the Slytherin table, eyes scanning it quickly to get one quick look at Minho before you whispered, "Minho fell asleep waiting for me to finish cleaning. He looked idiotic as he did so I sorta just—how do I say this— stared at him? But it wasn't like I was admiring him, it was more like I didn't want that stupid look on his face to go away. It was amusing."

"And?"

"In the middle of that he went, 'are you done staring yet?' It was like he had a sixth sense or something," you muttered, "Now I feel like he's making fun of me."

"Doesn't he always make fun of you," Felix had yet again stuffed his mouth, so his words were still muffled, "Why does it matter this time?"

"It's different. It's not some useless situation… it was genuinely embarrassing," you poke the food before taking a bite of your own, "He's going to it against me, I already know."

"Don't worry, I'm pretty sure he'll forget it sooner than you will."

"Hey remember when I caught you staring at me?" Minho's voice echoed faintly throughout the room. He stood up to stretch before he crouched back down.

"I never stared at you," you sneered, "And why are you talking about that as if it happened years ago. That was literally last week."

"That's long enough in my book," he retorted, "Good times." A small reminiscing type smile appearing on his lips.

"Can you not start? I sorta want today to be stress-free and you're literally ruining it," you roll your eyes and move onto the next tile on your side. Minho had decided to choose a different record to play today, one the professors had never played in class. It had been hidden behind all the other records being used, and it took Minho a good five minutes to rake through all of them just to get to it.

The songs were more upbeat than the waltz music you were forced to listen to, which was actually much more perfect for cleaning to. It made it a bit more bearable than the last two times you had to clean.

Minho didn't reply, though you didn't see how he switched glances between you and the mechanical polisher in hand. The track had shifted into a faster song, something that was easy to dance to. From where he stood, he could see your knitted eyebrows, eyes dropping from the slight fatigue blanketing over you after a long school day.

Upon awareness that his shoulders were slumped, he straightened himself and sighed. This week had indeed been a long week, and it was evident in some way in both of you. This was the last of the week's labour before he could go and relax while mindlessly saving his homework for Sunday.

The music had been tempting to let go earlier than he should for the week, the steady beat and the catchy melody filling the room.

Putting the polisher and the rag down, he took a few steps towards you, still contemplating whether he should do what he was thinking or not. He was unsure whether it was bizarre for him to pull such a thing. But you did say you wanted a stress-free day, so he thought he should switch up a bit.

He started moving his body to the rhythm of the music, head bobbing as it took over him naturally. It was easier dancing alone than with a partner, that's for sure, but he wanted to invite you.

"Y/N!" He was freestyling, arms flailing and legs bringing him across the room with a swift movement.

You sighed, "What now?" Turning to Minho, you find him in the middle of the dance room, doing what the room was made for. He had a foreign smile on his face, not the usual smirk you'd find him sporting.

"What the–"

"Join me!"

You went through several different emotions in seconds, confusion, amusement, joy, contemplation… how were you supposed to react to a goofy Minho?

"Join me!" He repeated. This time he approached you, hands out in invitation, "C'mon it's fun!"

"Minho, we have to finish this so we can leave, remember?" You tried to keep a stern look on your face, yet you couldn't hold back the smile that had been forcing itself out. Minho suited this look; It was happier and carefree. You didn't know that his eyes would light up when he smiled a somewhat gummy smile.

"I know, but let's take a break," being the impatient boy he was, he took hold of your hands and pulled you up. He led you in a dance that probably wasn't considered a partner dance. He just pushed your arms back and forth like those scenes in the movies.

"Minho!" You finally let out a laugh, feet unable to keep up with his. He was sidestepping left, then sidestepping right, then back and forth, all unplanned. You stumbled, letting out joyful laughter that was rare around Minho. He laughed along with you, eyes disappearing the bigger his smile got.

When your legs had gotten worn out from constant movement, you tripped over one of them, sending you and your dance partner to the ground. Instead of erupting anger that would have usually washed over you, fits of laughter fell in its place, echoing throughout the room.

Before you could ask if he was okay, you hear footsteps enter the room, a confused Professor Shin staring the both of you down, "What are you two doing?! This is not polishing the floors!" The exasperation changed the normal hue of her skin into a shade of crimson.

Quickly apologizing, you get up and return to your so-called 'stations,' not being able to say another word about what had just happened to each other.

You wouldn't admit it out loud, not in front of Minho at least… but that was the most fun you've had in weeks.

Little did you know, Minho felt the same way.

There was a part of you who had gotten used to Minho's horrible dancing after two weeks of dancing classes. After what happened last week, there was a tiny sliver of toleration that had surfaced from both of you. It was mutual. But obviously, neither of you were going to admit it.

Though Minho was starting to get somewhat bearable, there were still days when he'd begin to act up, smirk pinned tightly on his lips while he mischievously pranced about in the dance room. Today was one of those days.

When Professor had slipped the record onto the play, dropping the needle onto the very edge and starting it, Minho had chosen to let his body go heavy, relying on you to haul him around like a giant, weighted ragdoll. You knew he wasn't tired, just judging by the look in his eyes.

"Give it up," you tugged him roughly in one direction, then again towards another, feet hardly following the steps the class was taught the past few weeks. If Minho let his body grow just a bit limper than it already was, his head would have fallen directly onto your shoulder. If you were being honest, you didn't want any attention from anyone else in the room, "Lee Minho, I'm not in the mood for this today, okay?"

Minho's ears perked at the foreign tone that had slipped from your lips, sensing that you were being serious. You would tell him to quit it most days, but never with that tone; It was no fun if you weren't fighting back. Sighing quietly, he had picked his body up and started to follow the eight-count that Professor Shin was practically yelling out.

This minor change didn't go unnoticed by you, feeling his body grow lighter just moments after you'd ask him to quit it. Did he just…?

Other students in the room were surprised that you two were going more than thirty seconds without arguing like a married couple. Many sets of eyes didn't bother leaving the both of you, watching what would happen next in the twist of events.

Minho's feet carried his body swiftly; for the first time, he was guiding you like he was supposed to, but his eyes were glued to his feet, not wanting it to become weird if he were to make accidental eye contact with you. He didn't like how quiet it was between the both of you. The music didn't even do its purpose by filling the silence.

"Are you going to the Yule Ball?" Minho asked awkwardly. He twirled you as part of the dance. He recognized that look on your face which was basically a wordless reply, "That was probably a dumb question." Shaking his head, Minho mentally slapped himself. Never in his life did he fail with words.

"Of course I'm going," you replied rather expressionless, "Why would I not?" You were almost as confused as earlier. Minho trying to make a civilized conversation. Who the fuck was this? It wasn't Minho.

He shrugs, "I don't know… I guess you have a date…?" Minho, what the fuck. He squeezed his eyes shut as if the stone floor would swallow him wholly to take him away from this situation.

As puzzled as you were, you still decided to keep the conversation as it was, "Nope… I think I'm just going with Felix for fun." You tried to keep your tone calm when really you were freaking out. The only thing was you had no idea why you were freaking out, "Y-you?" Facepalm.

"No one."

None of you chose to speak after, not knowing where the conversation was going. The song was slowly reaching the end, which you had wished came sooner. Minho's hands were growing sweaty, and you wanted nothing more than to wipe your hand off. It was getting hot in the room too. Your collar was growing tight, throat itching for water.

Minho's heart was beating a bit too fast for his liking, but it was probably because he was growing tired from the moving. He wondered if you could feel how sweaty his hands were getting. Embarrassing.

"Final counts!" Professor Na called out before the static of the record player replaced the music. The two of the professors had clapped in adoration, overlooking all the students in the room.

Professor Shin had a broad smile on her face, "Beautiful! Gorgeous! Best one so far!" She twirled in place, "Thank you everyone! The Yule ball is in two weeks so I am very pleased with the effort you all are putting into this class! Remember we still have the final class in which you are graded, which I'm sure you all will ace."

"I couldn't care less," Minho mumbled, only so you could hear.

You turn to him, squinting your eyes and tilting your head to express your slight frustration, "You know I'm your partner right?"

"Oh no~ really?," he stuffed his hands into his pockets, "And?"

"And? I don't want to fail this class, even though I'm forced to dance with you," you stated, "So don't you fucking dare fail us both." That tone in your voice was evident once again, catching Minho off guard. The only reason that it had this effect on him was that he was so used to you choosing to fight back. It was like some sort of reminder that everyone around him was getting old, and soon all those around him were expected to be serious.

Nevertheless, Minho shrugs to annoy you, "Whatever."

Instead of answering, you eyed him once more. Your dancing just a few moments ago says otherwise.

You had practically sighed out the total capacity of your lungs as you hung onto Felix's arms on the way out the door.

"What are you sighing about?" He chuckled.

"You already know," you elbowed him.

Felix rolled his eyes and sang, "I saw you guys dancing earlier~."

You pushed him away gently, shock littering your face and posture, "What the bloody hell are you on about now, Lee?"

"You guys actually look cute together when you aren't babbling and all," he grinned innocently. Your heart had the audacity to skip a beat, startling you just as much as Felix did.

"Cute?" You scoffed, "First you said you think he liked me, now this? Are you his wingman or something? Are you trying to get me to like him?"

Felix skipped in his step, "I don't even talk to Minho, Y/N, don't be ridiculous… wait… did you basically just say you're starting to like him?" He gasped, hand slapping over his mouth, which had fallen in shock.

"No," you say flatly.

"Liar," Felix poked at your rib, "Liar. At least confess that you find him less bad."

"Sure, whatever makes you happy, Felix."

When you had fallen out of Felix's line of sight, you let the corner of your mouths turn up slightly. He said we looked cute, you think, only followed by you flicking yourself in the temple.

"I thought you were staying here until it closed?" you frown at Felix, who started gathering his stuff. You both had planned on cramming everything in for a test the next day, but plans didn't go as planned when Felix was eager to go back to the dormitories to sleep until the morning.

"My eyes are going to fall out of their sockets if I don't go and sleep, Y/N," he pats your head as if he were talking to a young child, "You can stay if you want. I know how much you hate studying in the common room." He double-checks his area to ensure he hadn't forgotten any of his belongings before patting your head once more. He grins and turns towards the door of the library, leaving you sitting alone at the table.

"Felix ~" You called out quietly, only for him to wave with his back facing you. You sighed and slumped back in your chair, resting your arms on the handles. Libraries were so much better when you had company.

The words in the textbook were starting to turn into blobs of ink, and for a second, you were thinking about following in Felix's footsteps. After moments of consideration, you shook your head and sat up. You'll stay, even if it was against the will of your fatigue self that had been prompting you to leave. This was all your fault anyway. Procrastination was a cruel thing.

Hunching forward, you let your eyes trace over the words, trying to process the information. You rewrote the info you wished to remember carelessly. Your notes resembled chicken scratch, but at this point, you didn't care because it was simply supplementary to your studying. The sun was close to its horizon, and the library was close to empty. It was somewhat more motivating.

Slowly the information had started to get more interesting. It was easier to run through the key terms and ideas listed in the textbook, and you could feel the exhaustion simply leaving your body. I'll finish this one last chapter and then save the rest for lunch tomorrow.

Your focus on the book had hindered your peripheral vision that the presence of another wizard floating over your shoulder went unnoticed. It was only until they had sat down next to you when you finally noticed.

You jumped in your seat, eyes growing wide. You had luckily suppressed your scream with your hand, which you had, out of defense, swung forward, slapping the person in the chest.

"Ow! What was that for?"

"You don't sneak up on people like that, Minho," you rolled your eyes at the Slytherin, shifting away from him before turning your attention back towards the textbook. He scooches closer with intentions of irritating you, pushing his face towards your book, "What are you doing?"

You push him away and stick one of the thicker books between you both, "What does it look like?"

"Studying?"

"You're smarter than I thought, Lee Minho," sarcasm dripped from your voice as you glared at him. Attempting to continue with the final chapter, you miserably fail when Minho interrupts your concentration by tapping his fingers loudly against the wooden table.

"Don't you have anything better to do?" you say numbly, voice muffled by your robe, "I was literally just sitting here and you decide to do this."

Minho shrugs and uses his arms as a makeshift pillow, "I was bored, saw you, here I am, I'm here to stay."

Your eyebrows furrowed at the fact that Minho decided to 'spend time with you upon seeing you. You had no idea whether to feel flattered or irritated, but you knew you were confused. He could've just gone back to the Slytherin dungeons to sit with his housemates, but he saw you and decided to sit with you.

Staring blankly at the bookshelves across from you, you huffed out the corner of your mouth, blowing a stray strand of hair by your cheek. You did say you wanted company. You just weren't sure if it was Minho's company that you wanted. Glancing down briefly at him, and looked back up to the bookshelves.

"Fine," you say after pondering about the idea.

Minho's ears perked up, raising his brows, "Fine?"

"Just don't be loud."

Minho's head tilts in confusion, though he still complies, sitting next to you patiently. You continued to read through the final chapter, which you had underestimated in length. The chapter was a good half a centimetre in thickness. Though it didn't seem as much at first glance, the pages were practically dipped in ink, words covering it from one corner to the other.

You could feel your eyes grow heavy as you delve deeper into the chapter. Your bed was calling for you, but there was no way you were going to give. Not until this chapter was finished.

The library had been silent except for the occasional click of the pen from the librarian's desk. You had been mentally counting down the number of pages left to skim over, eager to feel that feeling of satisfaction you usually get once you finish a task. It was the same feeling as crossing or checking off a chore on a to-do list.

Minho had settled his eyes on the centre of your book, keeping them steady even as you flipped the pages. He felt the lids of eyes gradually get heavier as each page went by, and by the time you shut the book in delight, he had fallen asleep.

"Again?" You furrowed your eyebrows, remembering the last time he had fallen asleep in your presence. You darted your eyes away from his dormant figure, not making that same mistake twice, "Minho, wake up."

He stirs right away, head rising from his arms. This time he says nothing, pushing himself off of the library's chair before stumbling over his own feet as he makes his way to your side. He looked like a toddler, and it was admittedly adorable.

"Why didn't you just go straight to the dorms if you were tired," you snorted at his dumbassery. Some students still littered the halls even if curfew was nearing. Instead of parting from your side at the library's entrance, Minho stuck by your side.

"I wanted to spend time with you outside of class," he grumbles. He blinks at the long corridor in front of you two, eyes barely staying open from exhaustion.

Feeling your heart skip a beat, you tried to pick out if he was joking or not, but his tone screamed, 'I'm tired.' Any other emotion was hard to comb out, so you sighed and shook your head, pressing your lips into a smile, "Sleep that cheesiness off, Lee Minho."

Minho continued to walk next to you, silent and confused about what you just had said. It wasn't like he was drunk. He was well aware of what he just said. Nonetheless, he subtly walked you to the kitchen corridor, parting ways with you with an uttered 'goodbye.'

vi.

Sitting against the stone wall, you watched the rest of the class carry out the dance routine, formation changes and all. You ran through it with them, only mentally as your partner was nowhere to be found, and the class was halfway done.

There were barely any classes left before the final graded run through, and Minho really thought it'd be funny to skip? You would have let it pass if you guys weren't the worst duo in the room, but you guys are the worst duo in the room, which made the situation different.

"Professor Na," You asked quietly, "Has Lee Minho been excused from today's class. Is he ill?" You didn't want to jump to conclusions, keeping in mind that people did have their own reasons. Maybe he had caught a cold or was doing a missed exam that was far more important than dancing.

"No word from Minho, Y/N," the professor hummed back.

You frowned and thanked him, turning back to the main dance floor, students moving in sync. Where was he?

Just as you had finished your train of thought, the door had swung open just like it probably did on the first day of class. Minho stumbled in, hair a mess and a rather sheepish smile stamped on his lips.

"I apologize Professors," he bowed deeply, following the perimeter of the room. He bowed again as he reached the two instructors at the front of the room.

Professor Shin stopped her counting, "No need to apologize to us, apologize to your partner." She gestured towards you, already looking back. Minho nodded and approached you, though when he did reach you, he didn't apologize.

"And?"

"And what?" Minho ridiculed.

"Aren't you going to apologize like what the Professor asked?" You tried not to laugh at how Minho had been acting.

Minho let out a cackle, “No? Why should I? Can you stand up so we can start dancing or something?" His hand was itching to reach out for yours, feeling like he should pull you towards him, but he hindered himself from doing so, stuffing his hands into his pockets.

Instead of pushing the apology out of him, you decided against it, not wanting to waste any of your time, "Why are you even late?"

The two of you followed the crowd, joining in at the perfect time. Minho smirked, "Worried about me or something? I know I'm in your head twenty-four seven, but I didn't expect you to be so obvious about it."

Tightening your grip around his hand, you gritted your teeth, "I wasn't worried about you, nitwit."

"Then why are you asking?"

"Because you made me sit, doing nothing for nearly forty-five minutes?" You reply as if you were pointing out the obvious, "So why are you late and coming to class looking like a mountain troll?"

"Wow, ouch," he sighed, "I slept in. Am I going to hell for doing so? Because I can recall you did the same the first day and got us into this mess."

"This is about you, not me," you applied pressure onto his hands, causing him to stumble back slightly, ruining the rhythm he had built up. He furrowed his brows at you and did the same, only you were somehow ready for it.

"Oh please," Minho rolls his eyes, "You've done the same so you shouldn't even be mad at me."

"I'm only frustrated, not mad, there's a difference," you point out, "And I'm frustrated because we have that graded dance next week. If we fail, it's going to be your fault."

"It takes two to tango," he quoted, "And you already know where I stand on that. I don't ca-"

"Shut up, the professors are looking," you warned, flashbacks to the three weeks you had to polish the floors.

Minho laughed slightly, letting air blow out of his nose. He let his eyes drift down at you, keeping them there for a little too long.

"What?"

"Nothing," he shrugged, spinning you along with the other students, "You just looked way too terrified." The next move had the two of you closer than the initial space between you.

"I don't want to be spending an extra three hours with you after classes polishing the floor," you retort sharply. Instead of holding eye contact with him, you stared at the Slytherin crest on his uniform.

"I know you liked spending time with me, don't lie," he rolled his eyes teasingly.

"I'm not lying."

"You staring at me says otherwise."

"Oh hush about that already, I literally told you that I wasn't staring at you," Inwardly cringing, you felt relief once the music had stopped. You stepped back and eyed down the boy in front of you, "Why do keep bringing that up?"

Before Minho could give reasoning, Professor Na had spoken up from across the room, reminding everyone that the next class was the graded class. Though they wouldn't be strict with grading, he still wanted to see the students' effort 'flowing'. After a chorus of groans, class ended, allowing you to avoid Minho and find your way to Felix.

Someone tapping your shoulder had woken you up, head jolting up as if you were frightened.

"Oh I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare you," Chaeryeong gasped sheepishly. She was hovering over you slightly, eyes wide. She was changed into her nightwear.

You sat up, only now realizing you had fallen asleep in the common room, "It's alright. What time is it?" You didn't even remember how you fell asleep, but you sure did have a good sleep.

"It's almost midnight," she replied, "I needed to grab water from the kitchen, then I saw you here and figured it'd be more comfortable for you to go to sleep in your own bed rather than this tiny couch."

You grinned, "Thanks Chae… I'll probably get something from the kitchen as well."

She nods and mumbles out a quick goodnight before disappearing to the girls' dorms. You return her farewell before standing up, eyes drawn to the wrinkles your nap had made on your robe. Attempting to straighten the robe and yourself out, you stumbled towards the Hufflepuff house entrance, exiting promptly.

The fireplace had been lit, a few house elves roaming about and carrying out their own duties. They paid no mind to you, as midnight snacks weren't out of the ordinary for Hufflepuffs.

You asked for what you needed, then was given it with no delay, "Thank you." The house elf nods before turning away with a grunt.

You sit at one of the tables, zoning out as you stared at the blazing fire across from you. School was getting a bit more stressful than it usually has, which was probably the reason why you had fallen asleep without knowing. You remember coming back from a long library visit. Maybe you collapsed on the couch once you did.

You made mental notes on the work still yet to be done before the following week, spontaneously creating a headache. Standing up, you figured it was best for you to go back to sleep. Slipping the dish into the sink, you started making your way back to the dorms.

You rubbed your temples and shook your head as you closed your eyes. It probably hadn't been a good idea to be wandering with your eyes closed as you had immediately bumped into something firm.

"Y/N?"

Looking up, you came face to face with Lee Minho, who was just as shocked as you were. He had been dressed down in a knitted Slytherin sweater and pyjama pants.

"Minho? What in the world?"

He backs up after noticing how close you were to each other, "Could say the same 'bout you."

"My dorms are right there," you point just down the corridor, "While yours is in the dungeon…"

Minho blinks before he tries to move around you, eyes avoiding yours.

"What are you doing here?" you grab his wrist, eager to find out why he was roaming the halls. It wasn't unusual for students to be breaking the rules, especially Minho, who loved living up to the stereotypes of a Slytherin. He smirks at the skinship, which prompts you to let go of him, heat rising up to your cheeks without warning. You're suddenly glad it's dim around the two of you.

"I was… taking a walk," he successfully pushes past you and into the kitchen, a glass of water already there for him. He thanks the house elf, leaving the glass, before turning back to you. By the looks of it, it seems like he's been doing this before, like a routine.

Rolling your eyes, you scoffed, "Taking a walk? You're painfully awful at lying." And the pause in his speaking gave that away. You followed behind him, expecting an honest answer as if you deserved to know.

"Weren't you just leaving?"

"But my question is unanswered," you shrugged.

"I answered you, I was taking a walk," he pushed the answer. Putting the cup down, he turned to you, "I have… sleeping problems."

"You just lied again," you nonchalantly, "Just tell me the truth. No judgment. A Hufflepuff's promise." You weren't usually one to push an answer out of someone, but this situation was different.

"You say no judgment but I already know how you're going to react to the truth," he takes another sip of water.

"So you were lying!" You raised your brows, "I knew it!"

"You don't deserve the truth," he sighs. Finishing the cup of water, he starts to make his way out, not even turning to look back.

"Lee Minho!" You groaned. Maybe it was your fatigue self or the fact this felt like some sort of game, but you weren't holding yourself back, "When I said I wouldn't judge, I won't. My mind's open to whatever you're going to say."

Minho spins around to face you, stumbling backward a few more steps before he halts, "I was practicing the dance steps."

No judgment.

The flat expression on Minho's face indicated that he had no intentions of lying this time. He had his hands hiding behind his back, eyeing you just to see if you would live up to your promise. Instead of his expected reaction, he finds you smiling, something he'd only see when you were around your friends.

"Wipe that smile off of your face, bumblebee," he mutters.

"Didn't you say you didn't care about that class?" you quoted, a smirk slowly replacing your smile, "Why are you practicing the steps?"

Minho licked his lips. He was at a loss of words, nothing but the truth occupying his mind… Why the hell not?

"Because you care."

You blinked back at him, lips parting and meeting several times as you tried to find the right words to say. The silence was deafening. "What?"

"Because you care," Minho repeated. He kept his expression still, eyeing you, trying to figure out how you were taking this in.

How would he further explain it? He didn't know. All he knew was that ever since that specific moment between the both of you the other day, he took it upon himself to better his partner dancing. He didn't want anyone else knowing, not you, and especially not his housemates, which was why he chose to stay up late to do this; it was the real reason why he had shown up late to class.

You weren't sure if it was because it was quiet, but you could easily hear your heartbeat as it quickened. You try to cover up the fact that you wanted to freak out, "I don't know whether I should laugh or–"

"Yeah, whatever, shouldn't have told you in the first place," he mumbles. For some reason, he felt his heart lub-dub in a way that it shouldn't. He frowned and sighed, "Just forget it."

"Wait, Minho," you call quietly. He stopped in his tracks and turned, partially facing the wall and facing you. He stared back at you with a vacant look, waiting for you to say something. If you weren't going to be saying something nice, he didn't want to hear it after exposing himself like that.

"'Because you care?'" you frowned, "You can't just say that and leave." You already made up a possible answer to the countless questions through your mind, but it was still unclear whether or not that was it.

"What else do you want me to say?" Minho stuffs his hands into his pockets.

"I just want you to explain it," you reply quietly.

Minho glanced out the window sitting by you both before sitting down on its pane, "Remember that other day… when I told you I didn't care?" You nod and move closer to where he sat, unsure whether or not you should sit next to him or not, "I don't know… you were really serious back then… I guess I wasn't used to that. So I figured…"

There was a quick moment of silence before he huffs, almost sounding defeated.

"Did you know that I genuinely don't dislike you as much as you think I do?" He says out of the blue, throwing you off. You wanted to tell him to sleep it off again—why did moments like this always happen at night?

"I don't either," you say back, "At first I did… but I matured."

"I only ever argued with you out of amusement. You're the only person outside of Slytherin that could out-talk me and it bothered me for some reason," he laughed as if he recalled a memory.

"Me intimidating a Slytherin? Just wait til the others hear about this," you joke. He glanced towards your direction and saw a clever glint in your eye.

"Don't you dare," he holds back a smile before standing up to face you directly, "Or…"

"Or what?" You challenged, "Imagine how Seungmin would react! Donghyuck and Renjun? What about Yeosang and Wooyoung?" You start listing the other well-known Slytherins off of the top of your head, holding back a laugh as you watch Minho's face crumble into an expression that looks far too close to fear.

Minho recollects himself and shakes some sense into himself, "Or I'll make you go to the Yule Ball with me." He hadn't planned on asking you today, but the timing was perfect. It fit with the situation. If you were to react unfavourably, then he could just joke about it.

His question shut you up. Your eyes widened at him as you processed what he had used as a threat, "What if I want to go to the Yule Ball with you?"

Minho takes a step towards you, a smirk appearing on his lips. His confidence was skyrocketing, and you can tell, "Then I guess it's a date?"

Rolling your eyes, you let a smile grace softly onto your lips, nodding, "It's a date."

Bonus:

"I told you to wear something with gold," you whined jokingly as you were greeted with Minho, who had completely dodged your request. Instead of the black and gold look you were going for, he decided to wear a black suit that had traces of emerald. As much you wanted to match with your date, you had to admit that he still looked as handsome as ever in the attire. He looked like a prince.

"And look like a Hufflepuff? No thanks," he scoffed teasingly. He pulls out a corsage, one that matches the clothes he wore, tying it gently around your wrist, "You look very beautiful."

"Well, you look very handsome."

Minho laughed as he sticks out his forearm, a brow raised in your direction. Music being played by the live band had been spilling out of the ballroom; the voices of everyone attending gave the ball more life. It was exciting.

"Minho!" Seungmin had called. Felix, who had slipped from your side the moment Minho approached you, was standing by Seungmin, smiling brightly. He had been hyping you up the entire night, telling you that there should be nothing to worry about.

He was right.

"Shall we?" Minho asked. It was cheesy, but it worked.

"We shall."

Hope you enjoyed it! A like would be appreciated <3

215 notes · View notes

writteninkat · 3 years ago

Text

vii - stargazing idiots

word count - 2,854

warnings - reader goes through what is caused by past trauma, mentions of death, mentions of murder

"Angels like you can't fly down hell with me. I'm everything they said I would be."

index

Right after All Might showed up, your body gave up on you and Tsuyu and Izuku had to help keep you up. Your eyelids felt heavier than ever and your head felt like it was going to burst. Your breathing is ragged and the last thing you see is Aizawa's bloodied body before darkness swallows you hole.

It's cold. So very cold.

You open your eyes only to be greeted by a never ending darkness. You feel like you're floating in water.

"Y/n." You hear his all too familiar voice. It's deep, if you could feel it it would feel like rubbing against sandpaper, it's also very cold and a sound that's void of any emotion.

"You did this to me." All of a sudden, Aizawa is standing in front of you, face bloodied and brusied, arms broken and turned to numerous directions. "Why are you so weak?!" He yells as tears begin streaming down your face.

You curl your body, placing your hand on your ears to try and block out your teacher's voice, but it's as if they're everywhere. They're around and inside you.

"I died because of you!" Aizawa yells, gis voice echoing inside your head. "The nomu didn't kill me, you did! You are a murderer! It's because you're so weak that I died!"

You scream, your body feeling immense pressure as hot tears stream down your face. "I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" You yell.

"You killed me. You can never be a hero. You are a murderer, you hear me! I murderer!" You open your eyes, your body shaking as you watch his hand about to grab you.

"I'm not a murderer!" You yell, your eyes opening to the sight of a white ceiling. "Y/n! Calm down! It's just a nightmare!" You hear his gruff voice beside you, it always managed to calm you down. As you turn your head to face him, Katsuki can't help but feel his heart break at the sight of your cheeks wet with tears and eyes red and puffy.

"Suki..." You sob, your body immediately being pulled into a warm hug as Katsuki whispers shushes into your ear. His hand strokes your hair as his arms tigten around you. "It's okay, just let it all out. Cry to me. I'm right here."

Your loud sobs and yelling fill the rooms, even alerting some of the nurses but Katsuki motions for them to leave you two alone.

Your heart feels like it's being crushed and it feel difficult to breathe. Despite this, you don't want Katsuki to let you go. You don't want his familiar warmth to leave your side, not now when you're feeling especially vulnerable.

When your sobs quiet down, Katsuki slowly pulls away, looking into your eyes. "Hey, hey, it's okay. I'm here." He shushes, wiping away your tears as his eyes analyze yours.

"You're okay. What made you cry out like that?" He asks, thumb caressing your cheek softly. You place a hand on his wrist, melting into his touch as you closed your eyes, letting your tears fall.

"Aizawa sensei... He... I killed-"

"We heard Y/n was yelling. What's wrong?!" Midnight barges in, making you immediately turn to her. Behind her she has Present Mic and someone else who's wrapped up in bandages.

Your eyes widen, "Aizawa... sensei..." You mutter, the bandaged-up person tilting his head to the side. "Yes? Are you okay, Y/n?"

Tears fill your eyes again, but this time, there's no longer weight on your shoulders or heart and it feels much easier to breathe. You start sobbing once again, Katsuki looking lost and confused as to what he's supposed to do.

"You're not dead!" You sob, "I thought I killed you- hic- because I was too weak!" You cry out, using your knuckles to wipe away your tears only for them to be replaced by new ones.

"I thought I became a murderer-hic-because I was too weak to protect you, and you died because of me!" You don't even notice Aizawa walking up to you. Despite his bandaged state and the casts he has on both arms, he pulls you into a slightly awkward hug. You wrap your arms around his torso, careful not to hurt him with it.

"Why are you carrying such a burden? Why do you have such thoughts, little girl?" Aizawa asks, his tone hurt. "I have these injuries because I chose to protect you, my students. If I ever get hurt, never, and I mean never blame yourself for it."

You bury your face onto his chest, tears rolling at his words. "Heroes go through stuff like these every time. We sacrifice ourselves to protect the weak and also to keep the peace. In your journey to becoming a hero, you will encounter many situations like these, some are even more worse. But just remember my words-" he pushes you softly, looking down at your swollen eyes. "-have courage, have faith on yourself and the people around you. Trust in them to prevail through just like how you will. Remember that we are all strong because we are heroes but that doesn't mean we have to carry all the burden by ourselves. Be good to yourself and let go if you need to. You're only sixteen, it's okay to act like a child sometimes."

You never thought you'd hear those words from your homeroom teacher who always seemed so indifferent, but at the end of the day, he truly does care about his students from the bottom of his heart.

"Good evening, visiting hours ended five minutes ago. Only miss L/n's guardian if allowed to stay with her." A nurse knocks on your open door, catching everyone's attention.

"I'll be her guardian-" Katsuki cuts off Midnight's words, "Not so fast. I'm her guardian."

"None of you are my guardians." You sigh, "It's been a tiring day and I just want you all to rest. Especially you guys, Aizawa sensei and Katsuki." You move to lay on your bed, but Katsuki raises you a questioning brow.

"What do you mean long day? You've been out for two days." Your eyes widen at his words. You turn to look at the teachers and they all giving knowing nods. "Wait- so does that mean-" You point at Katsuki who rolls his eyes, "Yes, dumbass. I've been watching over you this whole time." At the realization of his words, Katsuki turns away to hide his blush and yet again, fails to notice the red tips of his ears.

"Anyway, the doctors say that you'll be discharged tomorrow morning so you can-" You cut of Aizawa, "Finally go back to school!" You sigh, stretching your arms out and then letting out a sigh.

"I was going to say stay home and rest but if that's what you want then I won't stop you. Bakugou." Katsuki turns around, his face and ears no longer flushed and is back to it's natural scowling state. "I'm not sure how or why your parents allowed you to stay here at the hospital but I'm glad at least someone is taking care of her. There are many qualified pros scouting this area especially at night so you two can rest easy."

With one last nod, the teachers all walk away, bidding the two of you good night. The door closes and you reach over to take your phone from the bedside table, unlocking it. Your eyes widen at the sight of forty-seven missed calls from your mom and just as many number of unread text messages.

"Your mom was called by the school about your situation and assured her that you were alright, but I guess that didn't stop her from blowing up your phone." Katsuki says, eyes on the apple he's peeling.

"Sorry about that, I bet you didn't get enough sleep with all the calling." Your eyebrows knit together in cringe as you force out a smile to which Katsuki shakes his head at. "Your mom is probably the one who didn't get any sleep at all. You should call her and ensure to her that you're alright." He points the knife at your phone before returning back to peeling the apple.

You call your mother in facetime and it rings twice before she answers. "Y/n oh my god! Are you alright, baby?! No, don't answer that. I'm on my way there right now-"

"Mom, what do you mean on your way- here in Japan?" Your eyes scan her background, heart falling to your stkmach as you recognize the airport.

"Hold on! Stop, stop! Mom! You have work back there in the states, you can't come to Japan."

"But you're hurt-"

"Mom," You sigh, "Look, I'm sorry for worrying you. But I swear, I'm fine. Just a few bruises and scrapes but what's a hero without scars, am I right?"

Your mom looks like she stopped walking as she sends you a wordied expression to which you smile reassuringly at her. "I'm fine, mom. Don't worry about me. I'll be able to take care of myself."

"But who's taking care of you in the hospital? I'm going there right now and-"

"Mom, even if you did come here now, I'll be discharged by the time you get here. Plus-" you look at Katsuki who's busy slicing the apples into little slices, designing them to look like bunnies. "-Someone's already taking care of me here. I'll be fine."

Your mother sighs, defeated as you watch her turn around. "Just- stay safe okay? I don't have anyone else."

"I know, mom. I love you so much."

"I love you more, my baby girl."

The two of you pucker your lips for a kiss before ending the call. You lean your back onto your now inclined bed, looking down at the bunny slice Katsuki is offering you. He still has that glare in his eyes, but if you look into them even more, they're much more softer. You take the slice from his fingers, letting out a soft thank you before taking a bite.

"When you blamed yourself a while ago." He starts, making you flinch at the topic. "Don't do that again."

"Suki-"

He slams the knife onto the table, "Please. It's not your fault. Even the strongest people have weaknesses. Don't put all the weight on yourself, please."

Your eyes widen at how vulnerable his voice sounds right now. You reach over, placing a hand on his soft hair. You smile softly, "Alright. I'm sorry I did that. I promise to rely on you more."

Katsuki looks up at you, eyes glassy and face flushing. "I never said you needed to rely on m-"

"I wanna look at the stars." You cut him off quickly, hopping off your bed to saunter towards the window. You push the glass window open, leaning in and taking a deep breath of the cold night air, smiling. You look up at the stars, wishing you had access to the rooftop since the view would be better up there.

"You know, we are at the twenty fifth floor of the hospital." Katsuki says, folding the fluffy blanket that you didn't even realize you were using. You don't think it's yours given that you've never seen it before. Was it Katsuki's?

"What are you saying?" You ask, letting him put on a sweater on you. Again, this piece of warm clothing wasn't yours as well. But by the sweet caramel scent it gave off, you come to a conclusion that this belonged to the angry blond gremlin who is currently standing on the window why the hell is he standing on the window?!

"Bakugou! Are you crazy?! Get off the window now!" You yell, pulling at his pants. "Oh stop being a square." He pushes the warm blanket on you, pulling you with him off the window and out of the hospital room. Before you let out a scream, he uses his quirk to push you two upwards, his hand gripping your sides tightly as your feet land on the cemented rooftop of the hospital.

At the notice of you no longer in the doorstep of death, you resort to hitting Katsuki's arm, letting your mouth run as you lecture him about how dangerous that act was. He responds to your reprimanding with a loud, milky, genuine laugh. Your hand comes to a hault as well as your mouth and you just stand there, awestruck at how handsome Katsuki actually looks when he's smiling.

You place a closed hand on your chest, feeling as your heart thumps against it vigorously. Ah, there it was again. The butterflies in your stomach that made your body feel lighter than it usually felt and your drying throat as well as your sweating palms.

"Come on, I find stargazing relaxing." He says, the usual angry tone of his voice gone, catching you off guard. He wraps his hand around your wrist softly, pulling you towards the center of the rooftop. He places the soft blanket on the ground, folding it once so it isn't too thin before laying down, patting the empty space for you. You mirror his actions, laying down beside him as you gazed up at the stars.

"You ever wonder what the alternative universe us are like?" You ask, eyes staring up at the twinkling stars as Katsuki raises a brow, turning his head towards you. "You believe in that bullshit?" He chuckles, making you gasp. "Don't call it bullshit! What else are the stars for??"

Katsuki presses his lips together to stop his laughter, "I don't know~ What are they for?" He asks you, tone sarcastic and pushing you off the edge. "To tell us about the future, and to show us how many other worlds are there other than ours!"

Katsuki can no longer hold in his laughter, clutching his stomach as he laughs his heart out. You narrow your eyes at him, pouting and crossing your arms against your chest. "Let me guess, let me guess." Katsuki wipes a tear away, "You also believe in the red string of fate?"

"How could you not believe it when-" You stop yourself from continuing your words. How could you not believe it when it caused the two of us to meet?

"When what? Come on, tell me! I promise not to laugh." You turn away, sitting up. Katsuki is still laughing as he follows you, taking your hand in his. "What else do I not know about you?" He asks, curling his four fingers with yours as he stands his thumb up, preparing for a thumb wrestle. You follow his actions and the two of you start the game. "I can't swim." You start.

"I had a pet goldfish but it died after a week." Katsuki chuckles.

"I only ever had two friends growing up- they were my mother's bodyguards. Eliot and Andrew."

"I like to cook."

"I still have my stuffed toys from when I was young."

"I tried to learn how to drive but after almost running over a cat, I swore never to drive again."

"I was pretty popular in middle school."

You chuckle, "I was bullied in middle school."

Katsuki stops moving his thumb, allowing you to pin his down. Your face brightens up as you smile, "I win!" You look up at him, smile almost immediately falling at the sight of his grin expression.

His head drops, covering up his eyes. "Hey, what happened? Did I say something wrong? Come on Suki, talk to me."

"I'm- Do you hate bullies?" He asks, his head still hanging.

"Well, hate is a strong word..." You look up at the stars, as if they were going to give you the right word you were looking for. "But I dislike them. What's the point of putting down someone especially when they've done nothing wrong to you? I don't use the word hate because I don't want to use it incorrectly, but to me bullies are sometimes just misunderstood or something. They have that superiority complex and I like to think that they have it because of their past that we don't know about or the thoughts they have in their heads."

You feel him padding his thumb over your hand. "Hey, you okay?" You ask, cupping his jaw to make him look uo at you. The look in his eyes, takes you aback- he looks so sad and regretful which only stirrs up more questions in your head.

"You're so good. You're such a good person, Y/n." His words cause you to furrow your brows in confusion. What was going on inside his head?

He drops his head to your shoulder, "You're an angel, Y/n. People are so lucky to have you in their lives."

You don't even think twice before the words leave uour mouth. "Even you?"

It takes him a few moments to respond and you begin to think that you made a mistake asking him that, but you feel him nod on your shoulder. "Especially me."

#bakugou fanfiction #bakugou katuski x reader #bakugou x y/n #mha bakugou #bakugou bios #bakugou katsuki #bakugou x you #bakugou imagine #bakugou fluff #mha fluff #bnha bakugou #bnha fluff #my hero fluff #my hero fanfic #boku no hero fluff

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starshiningsirius · 4 years ago

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Temptation (Yandere Overblot Jamil x reader)

Thank you for letting me use this gif @flowerofthemoonworld!

Everything about her stood to him mainly the fact that she always complimented him. Other compliments he'd brush off as they were always in comparison to what Kalim did and it would only seem like he would only get recognized for Kalim's mistakes and being a servant alone.

He couldn't be in the spotlight, but that didn't stop him from wanting more. You clearly tempted him with normal pleasantries and he had fallen deeper for it.

Your affection was what he wished for, but alas the genie couldn't grant wishes of the heart.

You had suffered just as much serving Kalim if not worse when you all ventured into Night Raven. You comforted him when Kalim was made dorm leader instead when he fully deserved it more. You understood him best.

He knew how smart you were and yet you had to make yourself average to accommodate for his master's lack of brain cells. You and him would work to the point where any homework was done later in the day late at night while Kalim would be asleep peacefully. At the end of the day you'd be tired beyond belief and he'd worry over whether you were okay or not, it only made his resentment grow. He truly did care for you and Kalim was only drawing him deeper into madness.

When he would make Kalim lash out it would never be at you, he always made sure she was never targeted. This was also a plus since you'd come and try to comfort him in his room sometimes falling asleep next to him and waking up together. He couldn't have been in anymore bliss. No matter the time of day you seemed to understand his burden being a servant under the Al Asim family. You never failed to bring some light into his most frustrating days.

That was all over now though, he had finally achieved what he wanted at least for the most part. The buffoon and the rest of them were far off in the desert at this point and it would take them days to get back. He could only smirk in what formerly was his master and what he no longer had to experience.

No more passive aggressive anger anymore now that Jamil had finally gotten rid that wretched brat. All because of his own carelessness.

He had ordered a few of his mindless servants, once bright Scarabia students to get him an item from the storage room filled with treasures Kalim's father had made him bring with him. He was headed toward one room after gaining what he needed from his servants.

Once he made it there he saw his sweet darling sleeping peacefully, oblivious to all the chaos that had ensued. She hadn't seen the video most likely which he was thankful for. Rhythmatic breathing was signalled by the rise and fall of the blanket she had on her.

Jamil watched for a moment put at ease by the sight alone. He couldn't blame her seeing as she deserved to rest but this couldn't wait a moment longer in his head, he needed to share the news with her first!

"Y/n, wake up my darling," He said quietly being considerate of his volume.

"Ja -mil, what is ... it?" She yawned before fully seeing the display in front of her after her eyes had adjusted.

"Jamil! Wha - what happened to you?"

"I finally achieved greatness, I'm finally sultan!"

"What do you mean your sultan? What happened to Kalim?!" At the sound of his name he sneered.

"He's taking a long trip and won't be back until who knows when, but forget about him. I have a surprise!" He seemed so much more happy then he had ever been in her eyes. She knew something was off about it though the mana radiating from him, how unhinged he seemed, not to mention the black ink like substance coating his arms and floating about him. His whole appearance had changed on its own, she knew this wasn't the Jamil she knew and admired.

"Jamil what have you done? This isn't you. You need to calm down."

"What ever do you mean darling? I've always been this way, and now we can have whatever we want! You no longer have to suffer under that imbecile of a prince! You have me and so many servants who'll be at your back and call!" He had completely lost it in her eyes and she had to try and get him back to his senses.

"Jamil no, Kalim-"

"WHY DO YOU KEEP SAYING HIS NAME?!" His voice boomed down the halls with a god like tone.

"I-" He didn't even let her get a sentence out.

"Don't you think you've suffered long enough under him? Why can't you see I want to be there for you, I want you, everything about you, the way you shower me with compliments isn't enough! I want your attention! You gave him so much can't I get the same?!"

He had dropped something it was a little loud and it caught her attention seeing it glimmer and sparkle. Since his darling's attention was taken away from him he glanced toward the side remembering what it was he forgot. A small detail yet so simple it almost made him laugh.

"I wonder if you know how the Sorcerer of Sand tried to gain the princess's favor?" He said using magic to lift the crown toward him effortlessly.

He made his way over to her the snakes that had formerly been his braided hair, hissing, making an unbearably loud obnoxious sound for her ears. She covered them and closed her eyes hoping this was all just a nightmare to go away when she wakes up.

He took her hand gently invoking her to open her eyes at the feeling of a slimy substance on her fingers. She had to face what she wished was a figment. Gazing directly into the eyes of her former friend. He had a sly smirk on his face as he spoke his next words.

"Please won't you accept this crown." She forgot just how enchanting his voice was. Her eyes went dull, and her expression was calmer.

"Yes, my dear Jamil." She answered immediately without question.

"I'm glad you see things my way."

This would be fine, Jamil had this all planned out. He just had to show her the luxuries she would receive and she'd come to understand. At least one good thing came from all of it as he made her intertwine lips with his own, she wouldn't remember any of it later on. The mind control bits at least, so he couldn't have her knowing the situation and eventually despise him.

No.

If he could just convince her to fall into his temptation as she had did to him. It would be simple.

. . .

They now sat together at a lavish dining display, the sultan smiling at his darling. While his darling showed some discomfort from the snakes that scared her to death.

'It would be fine.' The thought repeating in her head in an attempt to calm down her breathing as she tried to recollect her own memories of how all this came to pass.

"My darling why don't you eat, as much as you want, it's all for you."

She flinched when she heard his voice. It was calmer than before but her unease kept her from feeling safe. When one of the snakes came too close she yelped, the feeling was so strange and unexpected that she had no preparation, though who could have seen any of this coming. He had yelled at her before, she was well aware of that but nothing else afterwards.

"Y/n."

"Y -yes?" She responded without looking at him not even a glance was made that way, but she responded so it was an accomplishment achieved in his eyes. He just had to succeed in calming her frantic nerves.

His mind had already came up with an plan to solve the problem. Slowly but surely he pulled her into his lap and tried cradling like they used to do after frustrating days, venting to one another.

"My deepest apologies, I shouldn't have raised my voice, earlier." She was frigid in his arms, but she wasn't resisting in order to not anger him.

After a few moments of silence he sighed.

"Do you remember, when we were like this? You'd fall asleep after listening to me vent about my day."

She didn't respond but he did feel her relax a little. This was still Jamil, though he was different it was still him. Her mind tried to convince herself of that fact alone. If he knew that fact it had to be him. She was worried though, about Kalim and the others but she didn't dare mention them in fear of him raising his voice or possibly hurting her.

This relationship wasn't ideal, but it was a work in progress for Jamil wasn't one to give up so easily. The temptation he had was right within his arms and all it would take was some time to tempt her into falling for him as well.

Masterlist

#twisted wonderland #disney twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland x reader #jamil viper #yandere twisted wonderland #yandere jamil viper

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youremeimyou · 4 years ago

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Old Lovers

pairing: Min Yoongi x reader genre: angst with sprinkles of fluff, ex-boyfriend au word count: almost 5k warning: some passionate kissing

Description: Min Yoongi is your ex-boyfriend that you’ve parted ways not on the greatest of terms with. But in the makings of a mixtape, somethings will be rekindled. Will it be friendship or maybe more?

A/N: I’ve started writing this so long ago but only recently got to finish it. I haven’t been able to post any fics in a while even though I’ve got a lot of wip. I’m graduating uni and my life’s basically a chaos right now. But I liked writing this a lot. I hope you enjoy! Please let me know what you think of it :) [posting again cuz it’s not showing on tags ughh]

Going back to school has never been this painful to you before. Of course assingments, exams and longer than necessary lectures were always there to welcome you back to hell every year but no new semester intimidated you quite like this one does. Especially after the very much disconnected summer break you had.

Spending the summer in your hometown of Gwangju was a rushed decision that was actually forced upon you at the time. But it turned out to be exactly what you needed. At least, Hoseok made sure that it was. Being your life-long friend, he took matters into his own hands when you couldn't pull yourself together after the rough patch you've been through. The Hoseok-ie rule he called it: No getting in touch with anyone in Seoul. And while it was a little hard not reaching out to close friends in Seoul, you couldn't risk breaking the Hoseok-ie rule. He's sweet and you love him but that guy is one scary motherfucker when he's pissed.

Now, summertime's over and you're definetely not prepared to face your demons. It doesn't help that Hoseok's classes aren't starting until next week, either. That means you have to go through this alone.

On your way from the subway station to the campus, you check the new weekly schedule once more and it makes you let out a dissappointed huff. You can't blame anyone. You made this schedule. But do you have any idea why you decided to put music theory at 9 in the morning while you were making it? No.

Your legs take action before you know it and suddenly you're now turning to the other street. They continue to take you through another familiar path. As you close in on the shop at the corner, the calming smell of coffee reaches your nose and you realise why coming here was more tempting than attending class.

This coffee shop was your safe haven for the past three years and this semester isn't going to be any different. Even though it's so close to campus, not many people know about it and it's never hectic. Which is something you love and right now, definetely need. Some peace and quiet before starting the semester...

You enter and head straight to the barista, who happens to be a friend of yours since you're a regular.

"Hey Ryu."

"Well well, if it isn't Miss I'll come everyday this summer that never showed up once." Ryu has sarcasm alongside with mischief in his voice.

"I know but Hoseok kept me in Gwangju as a prisoner the whole summer, I'm sorry."

"Where's that dancing machine?"

"He doesn't have classes until next week so it's just me for now." You're still not over the fact he left you on your own for the first week.

"It's fine, you're not alone. Look!" Ryu points to the back where the tables are. You're confused as to who he could be pointing at. You and Hoseok are the only ones you know that come here- except...

In a flash, you stop turning around and hurriedly order a black coffee. "Please make it quick." you plead quietly but what's done is done, he already knows you're here. In fact you can hear footsteps approaching.

"That drink was great, dude. What's it called again?" He appears on your right side in his all-black outfit with a snapback. Nothing's changed about him, you think. Except you see some of his hair through the hat and it seems to be bleached. Something he hasn't done for a while. For the two years you two were together, to be exact.

"Oh, it's called yuanyang. You think I should put it on the menu?"

"Definetely, go for it."

It seems like he doesn't even acknowlegde the fact that you're right next to him. But why the hell did he even come here? You totally introduced him to this place and Ryu. So, you should get to keep this place after the break-up. Aren't those the rules?

He takes out his wallet to pay but pauses for a second. "Ryu, can I get two cookies to go?" he asks and hands over his card.

Two cookies? You know he doesn't like sugaries that much. You're almost sure he's meeting someone and it makes you scoff, unconsciously. Both him and Ryu side-eye you but you avert your gaze. "Chocolate ones, please." he adds. You think he must be ordering your favorites just to spite you.

He recieves the cookies from Ryu, fistbumps the guy and starts walking out. But then, just as he passes by you, he leaves one of the cookies on the counter in front of you and exits without another word.

First, you're shocked. And so is Ryu, apparently. You glance at him and he confusedly shrugs. Then, you're pissed. In a moment of anger, you blast out of there to go after him.

"Hey, Min Yoongi!" you shout.

He stops but doesn't turn around for a while. Just when he's about to, you appear right in front of him, the cookie in your hand.

"What's this?"

"What does it look like to you?" he retorts back, his eyes avoiding yours. And you frustratedly huff.

"What are you trying to pull?" you ask with hints of accusation in your voice. That's when he meets your gaze.

"Nothing at all. My fault for trying to be nice."

There it is, the Min Yoongi venom you were waiting for. He opens his mouth to say something else but you beat him to it.

"Ryu doesn't seem to know that we-" you pause. And immediately regret pausing. Why couldn't you just say it?

"Oh, right. You must be thinking that life stopped while you were away." And only as he says this that you notice the dark circles under his eyes. "He knows. So do a lot of other people, by the way."

Well, shit. You might've been away from all the post-breakup commotion but he was here. He was dealing with everyone of your social circle, alone. And what's the first thing you do when you see him for the first time after all that? Lashing out at him. And when he was just trying to be nice, too. Great...

"Can you move? I'm missing class." he says coldly. But despite trying to hide it, his voice sounds tired. Which makes you step out of his way and let him go. Instead, you start making your own way to class, being already late as it is.

Safe to say it's an awkward walk to campus, with you on one side of the street and Yoongi on the other. The bad news is, you constantly find yourself looking his way. Even though you curse under your breath everytime you catch yourself staring at him, you can't help but look again. But his eyes are completely fixed on the road, not even sparing you one glance.

To escape the awkwardness, you decide taking the longer route to class by heading for the stairs at the back while he takes the ones near the entrance. Since you're late and afraid of Professor Sol, you fasten your pace. Once you reach the door, your hand clashes into someone else's. Yoongi's. Of course, you think to yourself. You should've known he's taking music theory from Professor Sol. He's the best student when it comes to music and the best teacher here definetely wants him on his class.

It's too late when you realise you haven't removed your hand because he opens the door with yours under his, making it feel as though you're holding hands.

"So you finally decided to grace us with your presence? You shouldn't have. The class is about to end." Professor Sol scolds the two of you. She isn't exactly wrong. "I can pardon a student who already excells but the one who barely passes classes, I hope you know what you're doing Miss Y/N." One thing about her is that she notoriously discriminates between students and she's never liked you.

Yoongi's hand and yours is still connected and you feel him tense up. He actually used to be your guardian when it came to Professor Sol. And apparently old habits die hard because he grabs your hand harder and steps up a little. "The last I checked, at least eighty percent of your class fails every year, professor. It includes people who rank highest in some of the other classes. Strange, don't you think?"

Only Min Yoongi has the guts to do this. And only he gets a free pass after doing it. When the professor simply points you in the direction of the seats, Yoongi pulls you by the hand he’s still holding and sits you down. There’s immediately talk going around, people discussing if you were back together and all that. That’s when he snaps out of it and lets your hand go. So you’re finally able to let out the breath you were unknowingly holding. Then, he goes to one of the back seats and sits down himself. And you quietly wonder why that hurts you.

It's Hoseok's first day back and the two of you are enjoying some coffee at Ryu's shop, after a long school day.

"Y/N, I've got some bad news." he says, looking gloomy all of a sudden.

"Wha- hurry up and tell me." You hate the suspense, it makes you worry.

"I haven't been able to find a studio that we can continue the album with." He looks really upset. That's only natural, he's been working on this project for over a year now. Before you broke up with Yoongi, Hoseok was writing and producing a mixtape in Yoongi's studio with you and Yoongi's help. After you parted ways, the mixtape was put on hold.

"I've saved a lot of money this summer. We can look into some expensive ones too, I'm sure we can-"

"It's not the money, Y/N. I can't work on it the way I want to in any of those other studios. Even if it's one of the expensive ones." he cuts in. Yes, Yoongi was probably the only person to let Hoseok do his own thing.

"Well then, you should talk to Yoongi. I'm sure he'll be cool with working with you, still. As long as I don't show up, it should be fine."

He rolls his eyes. "I can't do it without you, Y/N. I'll need your help, so you'll have to show up eventually."

It's your turn to roll your eyes. You don't want anything to do with that studio. But you know how important this mixtape is to Hoseok, so you say okay. Even though you doubt Yoongi would be fine with you being there.

Speak of the devil and he shall appear. In his damned, cursed, beautiful leather jacket... This time there's no hat so you can fully observe his bleached hair and notice how it's grown longer.

"Would you really be okay with it? I don't wanna put you in this position, no. Let's just forget it-"

"Hoseok-ie, you're lovely. But for now, shut up." You get up and make your way to Yoongi's table. Hoseok's mixtape has to be done, no matter what. Seems like he hasn't noticed you so you clear your throat to grab his attention.

"What?" he asks, not looking at you. Your blood slowly starts to boil.

"I need to ask you something-"

"Ryu, I kinda need that coffee asap, buddy!" He cuts you off by hollering at the barista and starts to gather his things. He really must want to get on your nerves.

"Actually, first things first, why in the bloody hell are you still coming here?" You can't help but lash out again. You discovered this place after all, you have the right to claim it.

"Excuse me?"

"I showed you this place, it's my territory. Don't you know the break-up rules?"

He laughs at that. In such a condescending way that you regret saying it. He stops getting ready and settles on the table once again. "You're cute."

Oh, you're so close to smacking him on the head.

"And you're an asshole."

Ryu comes with Yoongi's order and leaves it on the table. "I thought you were in a hurry." He says while heading back to the counter.

"I suddenly wanna stay longer." Yoongi states, looking straight at you.

Every fiber of your being wants to avoid his eyes and run away from there, he knows exactly how to make you vulnerable. But you endure. For Hoseok.

"I'll get to the point. Hoseok needs to keep working with you. Our situation shouldn't effect his mixtape, don't you think?"

He switches to serious mode quickly. "Was this your idea or his?"

"What does it matter-"

"I'm only okay with it if he wants to do it on his own will and not by you forcing him."

Okay, you do get a little bossy sometimes but he didn't have to put it as harsh as that.

"He wants to. He refused other studios and all that."

You think you see his lips curve into a small smile for a second. Hoseok and Yoongi got along very well, actually. You never wanted for them to stop being friends, anyway. This might be a chance for them to catch up even. Of course, there's a slight problem.

"But- he says he can't do it without... well, me. He wants to make sure that you're okay with-"

"Not a problem." Yoongi unexpectantly cuts you off. You're rendered speechless due to shock. He finally turns his head and looks at you. "My studio is a workplace, Y/N. Why would it bother me when you're there for work purposes? Especially when you're essential to the process."

Yoongi's sense of kindness is a very strong thing. But it's well hidden under all the coldness and sarcasm. You'd know, it had taken you a while to get to it. But when you did, it made you fall for him even harder at the time. And now, even though things between you are over, you can still see it.

"Thanks..." is all you can say while turning around to go back but suddenly your feet stop and turn back around. "Actually, thanks for before with Professor Sol, too. Even though you don't need to stand up for me anymore-"

"It's not that I needed to, Y/N. It's that I wanted to."

He goes back to gathering his stuff and you head back to give Hoseok the details of how it went. Just as you're about to, Yoongi stops by your table before leaving.

"Hoseok-ie, text me later to come up with a schedule for studio hours, okay?"

Hoseok is visibly happy and responds with a big smile. "Sure thing."

It's been three weeks since Hoseok started to work at Yoongi's studio again. But today is the first time that you'll be going there since the break-up. Even though time has passed, you're still not used to being around Yoongi all the time. Like having to attend almost all the classes with him and also, well... without him.

Without him sitting next to you, practically glued to your side, while you both silently giggle in the middle of the lecture as he whispers stupid jokes in your ear. The fact that you're consantly around him (not by choice by the way) prevents you from getting over him.

And now the studio... One of the most dangerous places for you now because of the memories you have with him there. You know, an intimate, indoor space with dim lights... A perfect spot for activities you definitely don't want to be reminded of. But for your best friend Hoseok, you have to go.

When you arrive, you call Hoseok to open up the door, too nervous to ring the doorbell. Once you enter, your giggly friend drags you hurriedly into the recording room.

"Okay warm your voice up. We should start with the vocals-"

"Wow there, pickle." you say. Vocals were maybe the only thing you told him you wouldn't do. What did he think? That he could hurry you into it and you wouldn't notice? "What vocals, Hoseok? I'm here to arrange, mix and maybe write some melodies, you know that."

"Shhh... look you gotta. Otherwise Yoongi's gonna have some other girl do it and I don't want that."

What girl? For as long as you can remember, Yoongi has tried to get you to sing. For Hoseok's and other albums. But you don't have confidence in your voice so you've always refused. And now he just wants some other girl?

"Have you told him you don't want that?"

"Yes, obviously. He told me if I can't convince you, we had no other choice. So c'mon, just try for me? Pleaseee?"

You sneakily glance out the window to see Yoongi talking with the said girl. She’s probably from your school even though you haven’t seen her here before. She’s standing a bit too close to Yoongi’s chair and leaning on him a little but that’s none of your business. And you definetely don’t care. But still, you can’t have someone whom Hoseok’s not comfortable with, sing in his own damn album.

You go out the room and toward Yoongi and the girl. “We need to speak.” you say and head for the other room. Yoongi huffs while following after you.

“What is it miss grumpy?”

You roll your eyes. “Are you really pulling an ultimatom on me like this? Hoseok clearly isn’t okay with this girl-”

“Hoseok isn’t okay with anyone but you. This isn’t my ultimatom, it’s his. Marley’s like the third person I asked to do this and he didn’t like any of them. Because what he wants is your voice. You really can’t see that Y/N?”

He sounds fed up and exhausted. What he says makes sense too, since you know how stubborn and sneaky your best friend can be.

He continues. “Look, if we want the album to proceed there are three options. First is Marley does the vocals and Hoseok will be unhappy about it. Second is there’ll be no female vocals which will make the whole thing empty and far from what we planned. Or third, you can do them and save us all the grimace.”

He makes it seem like he doesn’t care which you’ll go with but in his eyes, you can see hope that you’ll say yes to the third. But no. You’re not ready, you can’t. In your mind, you suck. So you convince Hoseok to go with Marley for now.

So, days go by. Marley comes pretty often to record. Hoseok’s not frowning that much about it anymore. And you notice how every chance she gets, Marley is pulling the moves on Yoongi. Which seem to work, since sometimes they come in or leave together. None of it bothers you at all, you tell yourself.

One day, you come in pretty late at night remembering you left your notes there. Since you have a spare key, you think you can be in and out unnoticed. Silly you because once you hear Yoongi playing the piano, you can’t just leave. You wait outside the room until he’s done and some stupid momentary courage makes you go in.

“Oh- I’m sorry.” you instantly say when you see Marley sitting next to him. “I just forgot my- I was leaving-”

“Wait!” Yoongi says hurridly to stop you. “We were done here anyway.”

Marley doesn’t look happy but gets up and leaves.

“No really, I got my notes and I was about to head out. She doesn’t need to leave on my account-”

“It’s not on your account. But since you came in here, you must have something to say?”

Why does it feel like he wants you to say something? Why does it seem like he wants you to stay? You’re convinced it’s your own mind playing tricks on you.

“No. I don’t.” you lie with a broken voice. But your feet aren’t leaving. And Yoongi is still staring at you with a cold attitude but expecting eyes.

“Fine.” you give up and say. “I thought the piano room wasn’t allowed to just anyone. I guess since she was in here...” you cut yourself off. The piano room was kind of your special place when you were together. Nobody other than you was allowed in here. This is the place you two would spend hours and hours coming up with songs. Or just talking about things you shared only with each other.

“I’m just giving her piano lessons for some extra cash. And this room doesn’t mean much to me anymore.”

His answer dissappoints you. Not the part that he indirectly said they weren’t dating. The latter part. “And here I thought the whole secrecy of the piano room was just your way of pulling the moves on whoever you’re dating.” As long as the sentence is finished, you regret saying it. You know it isn’t right. What you said is unfair to every intimate and meaningful moment you had with him here. And your words come down like the last drop on his patience.

He shoots out of the seat. “If I wasn’t so goddamn sure that you already know how you’re the first person I ever brought in here, I’d be hurt. But instead I’m just pissed.”

He’s right to be. So you can’t say anything back.

“How can you even-” he stops for a moment. “But that’s just your way, isn’t it? Spit out venom whenever you don’t like something.”

“Me?” you ask in shock. Now this you can’t have. “No. Poisonous words are your specialty.”

“And you already left me for it, didn’t you? You left me so why would you care who I bring in here anyway?” He’s switched to his shouting voice now.

“You’re right, I’m sorry. But I left because you pushed me away, Yoongi.” He averts his gaze to the floor while you continue. “I know that you love music more than anything else but what I also happen to know is that you use it as an escape. An excuse to not get too close. But guess what? We were already too close for me to not realise what you were doing! And that is why I left!”

Both of you are obviously done shouting and silence takes over the room for a while. You already had to push back tears like twice now, so you decide to leave but just then, Yoongi has something to say.

“This room will never have any significance with anyone else besides you. Just know that.” he silently admits with his eyes still fixed on the ground. You don’t say anything and just walk away.

It’s nearly the end of the semester and Hoseok’s mixtape is finally finished. He was so exited that he accidentely published it three times in a row on soundcloud. And the fact that he’s getting some great feedback is the icing on top.

In the meantime, you’ve been doing a lot of thinking. After that fight with Yoongi, you’ve started to seriously consider the fact that maybe leaving him just like that was a mistake. Because yes, you were hurt that after all you had been through, he was still trying to keep you at bay. You felt like as you were falling completely and irreversably for him, he was still holding back. But when you left, you were gone all the way. Leaving him all alone when you knew he was hurt.

Spending the last couple of months together, you finally admitted to yourself that you missed him. And that it did bother you seeing him with other girls. It bothered you that Marley was so obviously into him. Even though he made it clear he wasn’t interested, you still felt... jealous.

But you never mustered up the courage to talk to him about any of these. Even though it seems like lately he’s trying not to be cold around you, trying to strike up random converstions in efforts to perhaps recover at least your friendship. For some stupid reason you can’t seem to dare let him back in.

Your buzzing phone pulls you out of your thoughts. You check and see it’s your best friend that you’ve been feeling extra proud of these days.

“Yes, my successful, on his way to become a star best friend?”

“Oh my god, Y/N. You won’t believe this!” he squeaks while talking. And you hate the suspense so you tell him to hurry up and tell you what’s up.

“Yoongi’s friend in radio 12 agreed to play the title song!”

“What??” you start to squeak in exitement as well. “When? When will it be on?”

“In about two minutes! Just put the station on, now!” he orders and hangs up immediately. He’ll probably call his parents next. You quickly do as he says and for sure, the next song is Hoseok’s title track. You start hopping in your bed, dancing around in your room with the dumbest smile on your face but then-

The bridge comes and it’s your voice. That’s impossible, you think. But it is you singing the bridge. And then it hits you. That one night you snuck into the studio with your spare key and recorded this exact bit, just to see how it’d be... As always, you thought it wasn’t good enough. But instead of deleting, you hid the file. Guess you couldn’t hide it that well, after all. Was it Hoseok that did this? Or...

Your phone buzzes again and once again it’s Hoseok. “Y/N- This was the best surprise you ever made for me. I’m literally about to cry, you sound so good! Thank you for doing this.”

It wasn’t Hoseok, then. But you’re thrilled to know he likes it that much. You’re thrilled to hear yourself on a freaking radio station that so many people listen to! It feels amazing. It gives you so much confidence. So much that after ending the call with Hoseok, you decide to go to the only person left who could’ve done this.

You’re at Yoongi’s door. You haven’t been here for a long time but despite the nervousness, you manage to knock. It’s pretty late but you know he’s a night owl, he should be up. Soon enough, he opens the door. He’s taken aback to see you at first but then his surprised expression turns into worry.

“I know why you’re here. I’m sorry I used the recording without your consent but-”

You launch yourself onto him and crash your lips on his. His response is so quick that it’s almost automatic. He pulls you in even more, closes the door with his foot and traps your body againts the wall with his own. All the while not parting your lips once. Your hands go to his hair. You’ve been wanting to brush your fingers through his hair ever since you’ve seen that he bleached it again after two years. You pull at the tips slightly. It makes him hum into your mouth.

“Wait-” he says while he pulls away suddenly. “You-” You’re both out of breath. “Are you really okay with what I did?”

“Yes.” You close the distance once again and this time he moves you to the couch. You’ve missed this couch. You’ve missed him...

He pulls back again. “Y/N- wait. What are we doing?”

“What do you think?” you tease as your lips travel down to his neck.

“I wanna talk to you first, though.” he manages to say between his panting.

“So talk.” you say and go back to the week spots on his neck, secretly smiling against his skin.

“You’re not-” he swallows a groan. “exactly making it easy.” He then pulls your head up to face him and gives you another long kiss. But this time not out of the heat of the moment. Instead with so much meaning engraved on it.

“Y/N... I never meant to hurt you.” he says staring into your eyes. “You were right, I was a coward but- I swear if you give me another chance, I will give it my all. I’ll be a thousand percent in.”

You smile. He looks so much like a lost puppy that it makes you want to tease him. “Well, prove that to me right now then.” you say slyly.

“Uhh- I will. I- I’m gonna go dye my hair brown, right now. I bleached it to get your attention, anyway. Not to attract others, I promise.” he says in panic.

You burst into laughter. When you first started dating, you talked him into not bleaching his hair anymore. You always said it was only for his health but he always knew you were jealous of girls getting attracted because of it, too. “No, don’t. I actually missed how even hotter it makes you look. Let’s keep that for now.” you say. “I was kidding, you don’t have to do or say any-”

“I love you.”

You pause. It’s not the first time he tells you that. But this time he says it in such a way that you’re certain it’s the real thing. Even more real than before. “I love you, too.”

“So...” he leans into you and whispers in your ear. “Couch or bed?”

You both giggle. “Surprise me.” you whisper back and he quickly tries to lift you but fails, making you both laugh out loud. “Umm- I haven’t been working out lately, baby. I’m sorry.” he says between giggles.

Between all the laughter, you silently thank him for giving you another chance, too. And make a mental promise that you won’t give this up so easily ever again.

....

A/N: This was my first Yoongi fic and I feel good about it. It’s really hard to imagine Yoongi not being a god at music so anytime I use him as a character, he’s always a prodigy lol. I can’t help it he’s just really good. Anyways if you’ve bared with this, thank you sooo much for reading and I hope you liked it. Let me know if you did. Always wash your hands and stay healthy :)

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picturejasper20 · 4 years ago

Text

I'm going to make a response to a SU video made a few years ago by @robobuddies, who goes by "Red Van Buskirk" the video is called "The Steven universe rant." The video was uploaded in 8 Sep in 2017.

Keep the date in mind because is going to become important later.

I going to refer to Red Van Buskirk as "they/them" since they prefer these pronouns and "Red Van" for short.

And don't harass this person in social media! This is supossed to be a response. Nothing else. I'm saying this because i know how things work. So, don't bully them. OK?

I'm not going to make a rebuttal of every single tiny detail because the video is 40 minutes long and the creator of the video sometimes jumps from one point to another and loses focus on what they are talking about:

First they start the video with a Disclaimer: "I'm going to be harsh and hyperbolic for the sake of entertainment".

Now here's my problem: i get sometimes youtube critics want to play a "persona" but sometimes comes off more as an lazy excuse to avoid criticism. This has happened before with Cinema Sins many times. It's not exactly a very good way of starting your video, specially if you want to be considered a profesional or be taken seriously.

Like if i'm going to give my opinion about something, i do it, i don't say "It's just my persona", i want to honest with my mutuals and people who like my content.

They also mention how the SU fandom can't take criticism and sometimes consider everything a personal attack. While i agree this fandom can be a living nightmare, the reason of why we sometimes get so mad is because people who sometimes do these types of rants don't do their research about the show, the video gets millions of views and well..

Which goes to my next point:

-Red Van, you need to do your research.

A huge part of the video they talk about the animation behind the show and mention "Motorcity" as a good example of composition.

Here's the thing: They barely mention which programs the creators use to create these shows or the animation studios which is quite a problem if you are going to talk about animation for half of your video.

"Motorcity is animated with a combination of Flash, Maya and After Effects – with backgrounds and other elements created in Photoshop."

"Created by Chris Prynoski, Motorcity is produced by Robin Red Breast, Inc. (a subsidiary of Titmouse, Inc.) and Disney Television Animation."

Link (X)

Steven universe was animated by two korean studios: Summin and Rough Draft

Link (X)

The programs the crewniverse used to animate Steven universe Link: (X)

They mention how the animators of Steven universe were "lazy" for not making the scene of "Mr.Greg"- Is over, isn't it? More interesting..

Here's the thing.. they wanted to:

This was the original concept but they didn't have time to animate it into the show. They were time restraints to animate it.

Link that talks about the episode Mr.Greg and the animatic: (X)

Now this episode "Mr.Greg" came out in 2016, and Red Van's SU video rant was uploaded in September 2017. That's like an year to find that post.. so why didn't they search for it?

They complain about the writers forgeting about the powers of the characters.. So, i'm just going to leave this right here from a SU reddit AMA:

The writers kinda came up with some powers but they also had a list of what powers they could do.

Now to be fair to Red Van, this AMA was made in way after their video, so i can't blame them for not knowing this detail.

They also mention how the gems don't use their powers to catch Peridot: The issue with this argument is that the gems had no idea how Gem Homeworld technology had changed and Peridot had tons of tricks to get the upper hand. And the gems only fight Peridot two times in season 2 before they catch her in "Catch and Release". That's why they catch her quickly in "Catch and Release" they already know her tricks and catch her by surprise.

"Peridot is coming.And we don't know who or what she'll be coming with. She's a modern gem with modern gem technology that's bound to overpower us." -Garnet Political Power

They also complain about Amethyst not using her shapeshifting powers to catch Peridot.. but later in "Message received" Amethyst shapeshifts into a helicopter to stop Peridot and her robot.. why they don't mention this?

Amethyst also used her shapeshifting powers in other battles (Ocean gem, Steven vs Amethyst).. they brieftly mention this for a second but don't go into much detail in their video.

In one part of their video they talk about the writing..they fail to mention how the process works.

Here's is how it works:

"As some of you know, Steven Universe is a storyboard driven show, meaning a team of storyboard artists are given an outline off of which they write all of the dialogue and storyboard the episode. The job of the outline, and my job, is to give them the basic framework for the episode - the story."

Link to Ben Levin post (X).

Here's is another one about Ian talking about the writing process: (X)

Now the Ben Levin post about writing is from 11 sep 2015. I think with 10-15 minutes you can find the post. And if i remember correctly it was even in the SU subreddit. And is from the episode "Lion 3"

They also mention Adventure time several times in their rant to compare it to Steven universe.

Now wasn't Adventure Time a storyboard driven show like Steven universe?

Well, yes.

"Each episode of Adventure Time takes about nine months to produce and begins in a writer’s room with series creator Ward, producers Adam Muto and Kent Osborne, and staff writer Jack Pendarvis. From that meeting, they generate a barebones, two-page outline. Those outlines are handed over to one of four storyboard teams who have two weeks to visually outline the episode. “They’re basically directing,” says Osborne. “They’re writing all the jokes, editing the outline, picking all the camera shots… what the episode is going to look like.”

Link

https://www.thedailybeast.com/this-is-how-an-episode-of-cartoon-networks-adventure-time-is-made#:~:text=Each%20episode%20of%20Adventure%20Time,barebones%2C%20two-page%20outline.&text=“They're%20basically%20directing%2C”%20says%20Osborne.

It's also worth of mentioning that Rebecca Sugar worked previously on Adventure time.. i think Red Van doesn't mention this detail in their video.

Rebecca Sugar was nominated for the episodes : "It Came from the Nightosphere" and "Simon and Marcy". She storyboarded " I Remember you" which has one of the most iconic moments in modern western animation. ( People who complain about Steven universe but like Adventure time rarely seem to mention this detail).

Link (X) (Episodes she storyboarded in Adventure time)

There is also one point they just start nitpicking and tearing down the show, which reminds me of Cinema sins, except is not as funny.

Red Van, what you are doing here in this part can be done with any other show and is a very easy thing to do. I could also make a 30 minute rant of MotorCity or tmnt 2012 nitpicking every tiny detail but it's not exactly good criticism.

They later complain about the Steven universe perspective..

I leave this here,is from that same SU AMA reddit i mentioned earlier in the post which explains the Steven's perspective.

Now, i didn't have a problem with the Steven only perspective. In many ways its what makes the story of SU work. We learn about the world as Steven learns. The more Steven grows, the more we learn things aren't as simple as they seemed to be.

Characters sometimes will hold information about X person from Steven, so he's forced to ask other characters about it.

It seems to be suggestive since i only actually started paying attention to it when people brought it up. Like, it wasn't such a big deal for me.

Now i could go on and on with this response but i would like to leave it here.

What do i think of this video? If i was a teacher and a student tried to show me a video like this for my class, i would probably ask the student to make it again. Not because it complains about Steven universe, is just is poorly organized in some parts and lacks proper research.

As someone who likes analyzing media is quite difficult for me to take this rant seriously. It has issues and is like those Cinema sins videos but isn't that funny.

And there's one more thing:

I found this youtube comment in which Red Van admitted that they should have done more research into the show production and animation. At least is good to know they are honest and say they made some mistakes in their video.

The problem is that.. well.. since their Steven universe rant many others have cited their work and their video has 1 million of views... even though it contain a few errors that the creator admitted.

I wouldn't call Red Van a bad person, they actually are nice. However.. Their SU video is a bit misguided and somewhat problematic. But is not the worst thing ever.

#steven universe #animation #rebecca sugar #crewniverse #bad takes #SU youtube #media analysis #western animation #response #long long post

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artistlove17 · 5 years ago

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This was my Nana at my second birthday party!

She and my Papaw bought me a new swingset that year.

My mom gave me some old pictures the other day on my 21st birthday from my 2nd birthday party, so this picture of my Nana is 19 years old... that's wild.

I've been thinking a lot about my Nana and my Papaw and my mom. And I realized that most of the people around my age act the way they do (fucking crazy) because of their parents and the environment they were raised in. Most of them had parents who either wouldn't allow them to do things (or couldn't afford it) or the opposite, where they forced their kids to play a sport or like a certain thing. (The amount of fathers I've seen get pissed off when their boys don't want to hunt deer or play football... I cannot tell you! Extreme Christian men are fucking bonkers about their children not being exactly how they want them...)

And it occurred to me that I actually didn't really have to deal with that. Not to any extreme level anyway...

I've seen a friend cry and scream and have several mental breakdowns because her dad would steal her journals and read them and told her that as long as she lived under his roof she wouldn't keep any secrets from him. He told her that reading was a waste of her time and money and refused to let her mom buy her the books she wanted. He told her that art and writing were also a waste of her time and practically beat it into her head that all she would ever amount to was a housewife who stayed at home raising babies and caring for a manchild/husband.

And he absolutely hated my guts because I tried my DAMNDEST to get her out of that mindset and to get her to see that she could be or do whatever she wanted (she WANTED to teach elementary school). (It all ended up with us falling out and her reverting back to being his little puppet and following every order he spit at her.) And so he ended up forcing her to go to college on a small grant and a student loan... but made her take the nursing program. Which she ended up failing out of almost immediately because nursing programs are extremely competitive and she was an average student with barely passing grades. (Not trying to make fun of her, but the standards compared to her actual grades were EXTREMELY unrealistic, even she knew it. But her father insisted.)

She ended up dropping out, marrying a criminal (also one of the ugliest dudes I've ever seen, like no joke.. his creepy eyes make me nauseated) and had a baby with him. Now she's constantly back and forth from "I love him, we're a happy little family, I'm a stay at home mom!" and "I hate men, both parents need a job, I can raise my child by myself!"

It just kind of eats at me because while we were friends I could see her finally getting away from her dad and the shit he was constantly shoving her way. But as soon as we stopped being friends... it just seemed like she gave up. And I don't blame myself or anything like that (after all, you can't help someone who refuses to believe they need help)... but it was just crazy to watch it all happen and to think about it now with a new outlook and probably a good bit more maturity.

While we were friends she was more open and out there and we could go hang out with the "weird kids" and party in our own way (usually at the arcade like the nerds we were). We would paint together and make friendship books together and just have fun as kids should... but then I moved away and watching her social media was like watching someone take a leap off a cliff. She even tried to steal my fiance and my friends from me amidst all of this insanity... just out of spite and jealousy that I got away and she stayed trapped in her own personal hell...

And one day it was like her dad finally got into her head. She started hanging out with people we used to hate. She started giving out blowjobs like candy on Halloween (to the point that guys were asking her for blowjobs for their 18th birthdays). She was constantly partying and drinking and doing who knows what kind of drugs. She got married to a guy she met while he was on the run from the police and they ended up having a baby and she became a stay at home mom. (Which she tried her hardest to pretend was fine by her in the beginning, but later had a meltdown over it and got a job again).

She gave up everything she said she wanted to do. Every dream she ever had. And became exactly the person her father was always telling her she would end up being.

Watching all of this happen and seeing how she ended up... was is so fucking surreal to me. It's just so... fucked up.

I surely didn't have the BEST childhood and I plan to raise any children I might have in the future very differently than how I was raised. But I did have a mother and an amazing set of grandparents who made sure I could do whatever I dreamt of.

When I decided I wanted to try out for basketball, my mom signed me up and made sure I went to every practice and game when I made the team. (Though I only played for 3 years before getting bored of it.)

When I wanted to play Tball as a toddler, mom signed me up and made sure there was always someone to take me to my games.

When I started dancing and doing cheerleading my grandparents paid for everything I needed and took me to and from every event and cheer camp.

When my Uncle started learning the guitar they bought me a small one to practice on. When he later started learning the keyboard, they bought me one of those too. I wanted to learn everything he did.

My mom let me get a couple of piercings and dye my hair crazy colors and wear whatever I wanted (except for when it was WAY too revealing for my age, then I was only allowed to wear it inside the house.) She allowed me the freedom to pick things out for myself and make myself look however I wanted. My Nana actually put hot pink streaks in my hair when I was 8 and I loved having colored hair after that...

And during the periods that I didn't want to be active... they let me do that too. They bought me notebook after notebook and sketchbook after sketchbook. They let me write and draw and sing and dance to my hearts fucking content. My Nana kept a wall in her house covered in my art. She loved that I was an artist and made sure to always support me.

My papaw even bought me my own pair of roller skates because for literally 5 years straight the only thing I wanted to do on the weekends was go to the movie theater.. and the skating rink! He and my Nana let me roller skate THROUGH THE HOUSE so I could practice without being in front of everyone. And then they'd take me to the skating rink and let me skate for hours. And now that I think about it... it's kind of crazy that they just let me skate in circles for hours by myself and never once tried to force me to make friends or talk to other kids. As long as I was happy and content, they didn't care.

They supported me and loved me no matter what I wanted to do and I honestly feel like that's why I don't just sit back and follow orders. I don't just do whatever someone tells me to do (unlike so many people around me who I've seen try SO hard to fit their parents expectations, only to fail almost every time.)

I did feel that pressure a little bit. Everyone expected me to do good in school and go off to college (because I was always good in school and made good grades, so it became an expectation). And I think that's why it hit me so bad to quit college... because I felt like I was letting everyone down. But then my mom reminded me that she gave up college so she could keep me and that college really isn't for everyone (even people who are good at school).

My Papaw supported my choice (I could tell he was a little unhappy) but he never voiced that he was in any way disappointed in me. He believes that since I earned my scholarship by myself, then I get to decide what to do with it... which includes not using it.

My Nana fully supported my decision. She thought similar to my Papaw, that I had earned that scholarship on my own and so I got to decide what happened with it. She was also one of the only people who really knew how mentally and emotionally fucked up I was while trying to attend college and fully supported me leaving that stress behind if it made me happy to do so.

I've seen kids fall apart because they never had people like this in their lives. They were never allowed to be themselves or just enjoy whatever it was they liked. They were constantly pushed and pushed until they finally went over the edge.

And that's really fucked up.

And I'm really thankful for my mom and grandparents who always allowed me to be myself and make decisions for myself.

I'm really thankful to have been allowed to be me (at least for the most part). 💛

#nana #family problems #family #mom #grandparents #grandpa #grandma #papaw #thankful #bad parenting #good parenting #letkidsbekids #livehowyouwant #followyourdreams #notyourparentsdreams

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direwolfblackrose · 3 years ago

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@redwyverndht this is a bit of a break down. I focused on facts he gives leaving out things like choices of word (for example "We’re still smack-dab in the middle of the largest experiment on children ever done" brings to mind specific ideas and processes which is not what's going on at all)

Again, most things aren't outright lies but for how it's presented and with the words used I'm not trusting the message. It reads like the typical infographic, so something simplified to an extreme degree to make a point. Reality and the learning process is much more complicated (notice he never actually gives options or suggestions on how to improve), I'm not sure you can simplify this much without it getting iffy.

*Before the late 19th century, no human society had ever attempted to formally educate the entire populace. It was either aristocracy, meritocracy, or a blend. And always male.

Attempts were made, they weren't necessarily successful, but some tried (for example Charlemagne). Education was also not always male. Of course not many women would study in the same way a man would but there where cases. And this only considering education in the modern sense, if we consider education as 'knowledge or skill obtained or developed by a learning process' most women would have an education, just on different skills.

-Homework doesn't really help, especially younger kids.

Homework is supposed to be given with the idea to teach how to organize time. With the idea that it can be broken down in smaller pieces (especially with topics where repetition is key) so as to not overwhelm anyone. Does this happen? No. Not at all. But you can't really blame a pencil when it makes a terrible calculator. It's not how you're supposed to use it.

The solution is not to get rid of homework, but to use it differently.

-Students don't learn a thing from testing. Most teachers don't either (it's supposed to help them tweak instruction, but that rarely happens).

When students don't learn from testing it's usually for 2 specific reasons: the results are not given quickly enough, and the students are overwhelmed to the point of not caring. Giving the results 2 weeks after the test doesn't help students, they probably forgot why they gave a specific answer and they've already moved on with the topic. Especially when you have other subjects to consider.

Teachers *should* consider other subjects and other possible works. It's not good to "only" give two tests a month if every teacher is doing the same. A more efficient type of testing would be a small check at the end of a lesson, and a general one at the end of the topic. A big one spanning 5 chapters is not useful, but teachers have very little time.

Yes, testing is supposed to help teachers improve their teaching but that doesn't happen not because tests are ineffective, but because of the attitude of many teachers (how many teachers have the idea of "if everyone passed it I made it too easy"? How many teachers are willing to go over a topic that enough people didn't pass? And should they be willing, do they even have the time?). Again, if you see tests as a teacher vs students where at least a few students have to fail for the teacher to win you're doing testing wrong. This is not the testing's fault though.

-Spending too much time on weak subjects HURTS.

Of course forcing a child to keep working on the same subject in the same way once you realize it's ineffective will hurt the child. You're supposed to give a break, and then change the approach. Change the method. Find alternatives.

Keeping at it in the same way will hurt the child in many different ways, much like it's going to hurt if you keep hitting against a wall. But if you just let the weak subjects go you're going to hurt the child more. Say a child is bad at reading, letting it go because not everyone is good at reading will never improve their reading skills and will hurt them, just like forcing them to read a book every evening is going to hurt them in different ways. What you should be doing is finding out where the problem is and then figure it out with the child. (communication is always vital)

kids learn things that matter to them, either because the knowledge and skills are "cool," or because .... they give the kids tools to liberate themselves and their communities.

No. Just no.

"coolness" might be a factor, but it's mostly out of interest. The child is not learning? Well, are you making it interesting? You think a child will learn Greek myths for cool points? You think a child will memorize Hieroglyphics to have the "tools to liberate themselves and their communities"?

(there's different reasons for why one learns, simplified: there are intrinsic and extrinsic motivations. Extrinsic = there's an external motivator, this is where "cool" points come in. Intrinsic = there's an internal motivator, this is where interest comes in and why most children learn. There's almost never a clear cut separation, most times it's a mix. Intrinsic motivation is best, but if the alternative is to have no motivation extrinsic motivation will work.)

Kids are acutely aware of injustice and by nature rebellious against the systems of authority that keep autonomy away from them.

Kids are complicated. Kids learn from adults. Kids will see injustice and cry out "it's not fair", then they can turn around and bully the different, they can make up rules to have a specific person at a disadvantage, they can exclude someone very unfairly. Kids are human. Do they often see injustice? Yes, but they may perform injustice just as often.

Kids aren't rebellious by nature. Kids aren't usually rebellious period. If a kid is rebellious there's often a serious problem. People start getting rebellious later in life, and even then you might just need to explain. I do believe, though, that teenagers are rebellious because people will try to keep autonomy away from them. I agree with that.

Education is all about capitalism. [...] THAT is why modern education is a failure.

Ok here I can just ask for sources. How do you define failure and how have you checked.

Is modern education currently the best possible type? No, there are many points we need to improve. But is it completely failing? I don't know. I honestly don't know. I do not believe so.

What I do know that schooling is improving. Look how the schooling system change in just a few generations. We still have a long way to go (because it's true this is a very new field) but we've also come a long way.

A Twitter Thread from David Bowles:

[Text transcript at the end of the screenshots]

I'll let you in on a secret. I have a doctorate in education, but the field’s basically just a 100 years old. We don’t really know what we’re doing. Our scholarly understanding of how learning happens is like astronomy 2000 years ago.

Most classroom practice is astrology.

Before the late 19th century, no human society had ever attempted to formally educate the entire populace. It was either aristocracy, meritocracy, or a blend. And always male.

We’re still smack-dab in the middle of the largest experiment on children ever done.

Most teachers perpetuate the “banking” model (Freire) used on them by their teachers, who likewise inherited it from theirs, etc.

Thus the elite “Lyceum” style of instruction continues even though it’s ineffectual with most kids.

What’s worse, the key strategies we’ve discovered, driven by cognitive science & child psychology, are quite regularly dismissed by pencil-pushing, test-driven administrators. Much like Trump ignores science, the majority of principals & superintendents I’ve known flout research.

Some definitions:

Banking model --> kids are like piggy banks: empty till you fill them with knowledge that you're the expert in.

Lyceum --> originally Aristotle's school, where the sons of land-owning citizens learned through lectures and research.

Things we (scholars) DO know:

-Homework doesn't really help, especially younger kids.

-Students don't learn a thing from testing. Most teachers don't either (it's supposed to help them tweak instruction, but that rarely happens).

-Spending too much time on weak subjects HURTS.

Do you want kids to learn? Here's something we've discovered: kids learn things that matter to them, either because the knowledge and skills are "cool," or because .... they give the kids tools to liberate themselves and their communities.

Maintaining the status quo? Nope.

Kids are acutely aware of injustice and by nature rebellious against the systems of authority that keep autonomy away from them.

If you're perpetuating those systems, teachers, you've already freaking lost.

They won't be learning much from you. Except what not to become. Sure, you can wear them down. That's what happened to most of you, isn't it? You saw the hideous flaw in the world and wanted to heal it. But year after numbing year, they made you learn their dogma by rote.

And now many of you are breaking the souls of children, too.

For what?

It's all smoke and mirrors. All the carefully crafted objectives, units and exams.

WE. DON'T. KNOW. HOW. PEOPLE. LEARN.

We barely understand the physical mechanisms behind MEMORY. But we DO know kids aren't empty piggy banks. They are BRIMMING with thought.

The last and most disgusting reality? The thing I hear in classroom after freaking classroom?

Education is all about capitalism.

"You need to learn these skills to get a good job." To be a good laborer. To help the wealthy generate more wealth, while you get scraps.

THAT is why modern education is a failure.

Its basic premise is monstrous.

"Why should I learn to read, Dr. Bowles?"

Because reading is magical. It makes life worth living. And being able to read, you can decode the strategies of your oppressors & stop them w/ their own words.

#*I considered leaving this point alone as I do feel like it's mostly pedantic on my part #but I decided that it showed how extremely simplified to the point of being wrong this is #I also considered putting it last but I do hate to go out of order for one thing #long post #this got way longer than expected #again it's mostly wording and oversemplification #but enough that I read it twice before deciding this was off #to me it reads as someone who had point and carefully decided how to present the facts to further his point

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volumeupvolumedown · 3 years ago

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I know this feeling. I've talked about burnout on here before, but I was burnt out on certain things.

I'm heading for full on burn out. A lot has changed. In 2020 we were running the office on four people. Now, it's two and it's been that way for most of the year. Just me and the person who trained me. In theory we have a manager but she's spread so thin being the director, the assistant director, on call and emergency field member, it really falls to us to do the day to day stuff.

Our field staff went from seventeen to nine with only three licensed to do a lot of the stuff needing to be done (and in my opinion, it's really two because one just doesn't want to do the job). this makes the office stuff near impossible because we can only do so much without approval and the people to give approval just aren't able to it, either because *they* need approval or they're running around trying to be four different people.

We are having the worst time getting new people because our parent company flat out refuses to pay competitive rates. My office mate and I are teetering ourselves because we are making far less than our work is worth, and not just because we have kept the office afloat through a pandemic, a buy out and a mass Exodus and we've done it as cheerfully as possible, but because we really could make more elsewhere. I don't know what her reasons for staying are, but mine are fairly simple. First, The people I work with, for all the crap they have to go through, are good teammates (the one I mentioned above is an exception). Second, it's close to my house. That's a big deal considering I don't drive. Any farther out and my transportation would be eating a huge chunk of my paycheck. Third, I admit it, my anxiety is getting in the way. This is hard and I don't make a lot, but what if I go somewhere else and it's worse?

Anyway, I know I'm heading toward massive burnout. I feel like I did when I was close to the end of my degrees. I use draft rants into my papers, I would edit them out, if course, but it was a struggle at times to not just let rip in the middle of a discussion. Because I was tired, tired of keeping my filter in place, tired of pretending that the guidelines for participating in these classes weren't insane and designed to help one fail rather than succeed. I was also tired of people acting like what I said and what I thought didn't matter because they had more letters behind their names. The number of times I had to stop myself from pointing out to a newly minted Phd who would not stop talking about how they have a doctorate so they will not take any feedback, that they only got said Phd due to the blood sweat and tears of their unpaid undergrad and grad students is too numerous to count. I did slip once when, during a class the professor asked us what the best advice we would give someone.

I said: "My MA isn't going to help me when my pipes burst. No matter how many degrees you have, you are going to need other people with other skill sets to help you and you are not *entitled* to that help by virtue of your education. So, don't be an ass."

Anyway, the struggle is back, I get people on the phone coming at me because, this thing isn't done or that thing isn't signed. I'm not allowed to tell these people to back the fuck off because we are working with less than half of our needed staff and our corporate is too busy aquiring more companies that they can throw into chaos, to do anything for those dealing with the fall out of that chaos. And I slipped, telling one of my co-workers to give me and my officemate a break because dealing with the day to day clusterfuck, and doing it with a smile is hard enough without the field staff blaming us for shit we can't control. I did manage to do it without the cussing.

It's the office drones who get blamed when shit goes sideways so I just hope the new year brings some help.

#rant

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pooma-education · 3 years ago

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Group discussion

Topic: How to make 💯 attendance of parents to PTA meeting in schools.

Participants: Ms. Leena Rai, Mrs. Buvana, Mrs. Farhana khan, Mr. Ashish Bhatnagar, Mr. Nahid Raza, Mrs. Gena Basti, Mrs. Durga K Nair, Azeez...

• Mrs. Buvana: Keep involving them in school decision making

• Leader. Ms. Leena Rai Kalra UNV: First they need to learn to be responsible towards his or her own child answerable to his or her future.

Every month calling and continuous interaction by the school may bring them to school.

We need to make them realise their duties inspite of the busy schedule.

PTA meetings are an added advantage where they can be encouraged that they too are going to be the next member.

Time to time their involvement in some activities

The interactive session of some parents with a few classes like a doctor parent to be in a school

An electrician parent can come to let the children learn mending of the fuse etc

• Mr. Nahid Raza UNV: We should accept our faults too. It will make us better

Mr. Cosmos: These are some ideas for boosting the numbers at your next meeting.

1. Vary the meeting time

2. Vary the meeting place

3. Encourage Attendance As A Responsibility

4. Make meetings more Fun

5. Give Prizes

6. Make meetings shorter

7. Combine meetings with other School Events

8. Publicize meetings

• Mrs. Gena Basti: I'm in to this field for 26years. None of the year i faced 100% attendance of parent on open meet. We'll make cl without fail after the open meet without fail. They'll come out with smiley face and very cool answer that' we had work at home, we saw the papers already, we had family function, etc., which is very lame and least bothered. If they respect only know their children will respect?.

• Mrs. Durga Nair UNV: We had a PTM once along with Grant Parents day celebration, the parents turned up count was really appreciable

• Mrs. M. Farhana Khan UNV: Make PTA meetings interesting by showing some documentary films or ask parents to come and show their skill if they have any

Mrs. Gena Basti: I use to choose remote areas to work. Can't blame. They do concentrate on their fields. I use to provide mobiles to my staff. Once in 15days they make calls to have good relationship with them . They are very much happy about the communication .

AZEEZ: Importance of PTA meeting in schools

It's a common human quest that not to listen someone is pointing mistakes or errors on their kids or on them. The reason behind is this that Parents are not interested in facing the designer's world of their kids.

The aim of PTA is now a days forgotten by the schools and the parents.

It helps the school to improve its standard and status.

It gives home school communication.

It gives ample opportunities to the children in all the ways-living, security, celebrations....not only for studies.

It develops community relationship with school and it goes beyond the school.

It gives solutions to problems to parents and the child.

It improves a sense of belongingness and participation.

It helps to get immediate support from the parents or society.

It is a bridge between school and society.

Some ways to improve Parents attendance in PTA:

• Stressed parents need a stress-free moments. They wanted to have fun in a safer place.

• Personal contact is what I have found to be the best way to not just improve meeting attendance, but also overall involvement. If you are outgoing and truly interested in other people and their ideas, they will gravitate towards you and school.

• Parents would come to see their kids but only about have the grade would show up in the meeting. Make some changes- offering refreshments, babysitting, personal interaction.....

• We need to make sure that everyone feels that they have a valid voice and opinion when they come to a meeting.

How many of our PTO's were cliques, or were perceived that way at one time or another?

• Honestly speaking, people are busy and families are over-scheduled these days...another meeting is the last thing people want to have to fit into their schedules.

And who can blame them?

• Try to look at things in a positive light...first of all, the more in attendance, you can pretty much guarantee a longer meeting!

• The length of the meetings is what scares people off.

• Try to see it as an assurance that your families trust that what you decide for the organization and the school is okay by them. Some might see it as apathy, but perhaps it's that they know that the group in place to make decisions is capable.

• Want/ Get feedback from parents?

Provide a quarterly (or more often) newsletter to the families, let them know what's going on.

• Survey them, offer a "suggestion box" at school...that way, people can offer ideas on their time, and not yours...

•Above all Respect them. We are source to their children and they are our only source for survival.

Let's leave competition, comments behind, we too human being and let's have free interactions with our surroundings by leaving our teacherhood for a while.

Smile for a while with them. While you smile the children behind them smile at you and start respecting you and listening you. The success stories begin from here when your students start listening to you.

Mr. Ashish Bhatnagar UNV: Well there can be many reasons for parents non-involvement in the PTA meets.

Parents might feel that whatever they discuss in these meets are never implemented. Lot of promises but not fulfilled.

They do not get proper feedback from teachers. A constructive and structured feedback is a must. Then they will always look forward to these PTMs.

Also involve parents in various activities in the school. Have a close bond with the parents. Communication is the key. One key person from school must keep communicating with parents.

In schools you can start up Parent Volunteers group and give them responsibilities to take care of it.

Year end on Annual day function you can award them THE BEST PARENTING AWARD for motivation.

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octannibal-blake · 7 years ago

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Halloween party with the gang! Bellamy and Clarke aren't exactly friends, but he/she can't deny she/he looks great in her/his costume this year...

aw thanks for the prompt, kat! lmao this got sooo long and i apologize ahead of time. i’m not sure if this is what you intended but this is where i ended up – i may have watched how i met your mother and the slutty pumpkin episode before this so…i blame that. anyways, i hope it’s enjoyable!

and so, we meet again

2013

It is onHalloween night that Bellamy decides he’s moved in to the worst apartmentcomplex ever. He’s sitting on his couch, perfectly content to write his essayin peace and drink shitty beer. He hates this stupid holiday, always has, andwould rather pretend that it’s just another day. Instead, he hears a knock onhis window and turns around defensively, poised to break the glass bottle overthe intruder’s head. Turns out, it’s just a pirate. Or his neighbor, dressed asa pirate, rather.

“Someone’sjumpy,” Nathan Miller comments, holding his hand (one actual hand, and one fakehook) up in surrender, “Chill, dude.”

He setsthe bottle down on the table with a deep breath, “Do you make it a habit toenter other people’s apartments unannounced?”

Miller shrugs,“Isn’t that kind of the point of sharing a fire escape?”

Bellamyrolls his eyes. He only moved into this apartment over the summer. His sisterjust began her first semester of college at NYU and he has been finishing hisMaster’s degree at Columbia (honestly, thank God both of them are smart becausethey couldn’t just afford this kind of education on their own). They decided torent an apartment in the city, thanks to a heft amount of help from theirgrandparents and working full time at the pub in the basement. The day theymoved in, they met their neighbors. Nathan Miller, the broody full-timemechanic and his boyfriend, Monty. The IT guy. That’s how Miller introducedhim, anyways.

“Let’sgo,” Miller gestures and begins to move back out the window. Bellamy doesn’tfollow. He might like his neighbors, and sure they’ve had a few nights inplaying Mario Kart on the 64, but now he comes in dressed as a pirate and justtells Bellamy to follow him? Sounds sketchy.

“Where?”

Millerstops and turns around dramatically and holds up his hook hand, “Costume party.On the roof. It’s an annual thing. Everybody in the building goes.”

“Nothanks,” he responds.

Tenminutes later he’s on the damn roof, music blaring out of someone’s ownpersonal amp and chatter filling the empty space. It’s a very well put togetherparty and it does seem like everyone in the building is in attendance – heshouldn’t be surprised. It’s a cheap complex close to college campus. Brokecollege students fill most of the rooms and this is very much the kind ofthings college kids would do. Unless you’re Bellamy, because fuck Halloween.

He sipsfrom his drink stoically, rolling his eyes at some of the costumes. Some ofthem are pretty typical – he’s seen multiple Avenger’s costumes. Plenty of sexynurses (which, he is absolutely not opposed to). He isn’t the kind of guy todress up, though. It’s just lucky that he happened to be wearing a t-shirt thatsays “costume” when Miller basically drug him from his apartment.

“Nicecostume,” a voice enters into his dramatic reverie. Next to him, a blondeprincess is filling her cup with the shitty vodka punch. She adjusts her tiaraas it begins to fall off her head and looks up at him with a smirk. She makesno movement to leave, just leans against the table and gives him a solid onceover. Apparently, she does not appreciate his t-shirt and jeans.

“Not intocostume parties?” she asks.

He shrugs,“Not into Halloween.”

This makesher roll her eyes at him, “Wow, you’re one of those people.”

One of thosepeople? He glares at her for a moment, “If one of those people means notwanting to contribute to a stupid holiday, then yeah, I am.”

“What’snot to like! Free candy. An excuse to dress up. Big parties?” the Princessseems to very much into Halloween, her costume speaking volumes. And she soundslike he had been personally attacking her when he said he didn’t like it. He’sentitled to an opinion.

“Overpriced candy, expensive outfits you only wear once, and not to mention some ofthose outfits appropriate multiple cultures and are thinly veiled racism,” hepoints out. He’s put a lot of thought into this over the years. Everythingabout Halloween is annoying and overrated.

“Wow,” shebreathes out, clearly surprised by his passionate answer, “You really have alot of feelings about this.”

“I’m justa realist,” he shrugs again, “This punch is terrible.”

“I canagree with that,” she says before making a show of chugging her own cup, “Butit tastes better the drunker you are.”

He getsanother cup. The Princess makes no show of going away to enjoy the dance flooror the free candy offered. Instead she remains at the drink table with him and somehow,they end up talking about extremely…intense topics. She’s in nursing schooland apparently, hates every minute of it. He tells her about failing his lastexam because he was working too many hours at the bar. It becomes a bitpessimistic at times. She decides to change the subject before he does.

“I knowit’s a mask,” she says after spotting a ridiculous Barack Obama costume, “Butit feels wrong to dress up as the President. Like they’re trying to insulthim.”

“Would yousay the same if someone came dressed as George Bush?” he asks, and not evenbecause he disagrees with her. But mostly because she looks really cute the wayher cheeks are flushed and her hands a flailing around trying to explain ethicsto him.

“I wouldprobably feel differently about that,” she points to the Obama mask wearingoffender, “If it wasn’t a white person.”

He liftshis cup to her, “Touché.”

He decideshe likes this Princess, even if she is a Halloween supporter. She’s got spunk.She’s feisty and she’s making the party somewhat bearable. Yet, somehow, onlyan hour has passed at the drink table before her phone goes off.

“I gottarun,” she says downing the rest of her drink and tossing the cup in the trash,“But thanks for entertaining me. Do you still hate Halloween?”

“That’snot changing,” he responds immediately. She only grins at that.

“Oh, Ithink it will.”

2014

He findsthat he really likes his apartment. Miller becomes one of his closest friend, asort of friendship he hadn’t experienced in a long time. Not since Raven Reyesdecided to go be an engineer at some prestigious college on the coast. Heenjoys having Miller around and even Monty has made an effort to includeBellamy in his D&D group. It’s not something he thought he would enjoy butactually, he loves it. Octavia stays pretty busy with school and hasn’t beenhome much, so he’s been forced to occupy his time with other things. Nerdythings, as his sister called them. He doesn’t really care. He feels like he’sfinding a home at this place.

They go tothe rooftop again for Halloween this year and he isn’t forced this time. Millerand Monty go as two video game characters he’s never heard of, which is verythem, and he keeps his costume. Miller rolls his eyes at the familiar oranget-shirt but doesn’t make him change. That’s a true friend. When they arrive,there are a few more people than last year and there seems to be two speakersinstead of one. They’re trying to make it a bit more exciting, according toMonty, but Bellamy thinks it’s just right.

He mightbe down to party, he still hates this holiday and probably will until the dayhe dies. Seriously, what was the fucking point of it? He leaves his friends tograb a drink and though he remembers how disgusting the punch was last year, hestill pours himself a cup. Yep, just as disgusting.

“Niceoutfit,” is how it starts once again. He turns to find the princess once againpouring herself a drink. It takes him a moment to recognize her, she’s got abrown wig twisted on the side of her head. Princess Leia. How original.

“I couldsay the same to you,” he comments with a scoff. She moves next to him, thewhole things feeling very much like a routine between the two of them despitebeing strangers. He hadn’t seen her since last Halloween. He figured she musthave moved on with her life, whatever that may be. Apparently, she just makes appearancesat the Halloween party.

“PrincessLeia is a badass,” she defends, and the spell begins again. He isn’t sure whatit is about her. She has a way of making him feel as though they’re old friendscatching up – she updates him a nursing school and he tells her about finishingundergrad and completing his Master’s. She tells him about wanting to be anartist but being pressured into nursing. He tells her about raising his sister.It’s all pretty fucking ridiculous considering he doesn’t even know her name.

“You wannadance?” she asks during a comfortable silence between them. Normally, he wouldsay no. But he finds himself nodding and following her to the dance floor.

“You a fanof Halloween yet?” she asks as he twirls her around to the sounds of MonsterMash.

“Hell no,”he responds, “You’ll have to try a little harder, Princess.”

She smirksat that, “Did you not get to trick or treat as a kid?”

He dipsher and she giggles, “Not really. Not a great neighborhood for getting candy.Might end up with a bag of meth instead.”

He doesn’tmean to get all serious. He’s just being honest. His mom worked hard to providefor them but they didn’t grow up in a great area. Not the kind of place to hangout and play baseball outside or anything. He’s okay with that. But she giveshim a pitying look and he lets go of her hand.

“I didn’tsay it to make you feel bad for me,” he grumbles defensively, and he’ssurprised when she gives him a soft smile.

“Oh, Idon’t,” she reassures him and he can’t help but feel a bit confused. Shesmiles, “I just think it’s all the more reason for you to give Halloween achance now that you’re older.”

Hechuckles at that, “You’re awfully determined.”

“This ismy favorite holiday.”

“We allhave our flaws,” he responds, and she gives him a playful shove and he grabsher hand. For a moment things are silent and he feels a magnetic pull towardsher. Something about her intrigues him and okay, she’s beautiful with herexpressive blue eyes and soft smile. Just as his lips brush against hers, herphone rings. She jumps back and stares at the screen, something changing in herface. She looks almost…sad.

“I have totake this,” she says apologetically. Before he can question her any further,she disappears.

Shedoesn’t come back.

2015

He findshimself choosing to celebrate Halloween, or rather, choosing to celebrate onbehalf of someone else. Gina, his girlfriend, had been adamant about doingsomething fun for the holiday. She likes dressing up and having a good time andhell, he doesn’t want to be the one to stop her. So, rather than go out andspend money he doesn’t have at some bar, he figured the rooftop party would bejust the place.

It’s moreof a spectacle this year. Some of the residents of the complex created acommittee to help spruce it up and when he arrives, it’s a vast difference fromthe past small soirees. There are lights strung up around the roof top, morepatio furniture had been added. There’s a DJ (though it’s just Monty’s friendJasper who also plays D&D on Wednesdays). There also seems to be morepeople, but this has it’s perks. Instead of cheap beer and shitty punch thereis more variety at the drink table. There are bottles and bottles of liquorfollowed by liters of soft drinks. Part of him thinks having a table to mixyour own drinks is an awful idea, but he plans on standing guard at the drinktable, anyway.

“Let’sdance!” Gina pleads with him when they arrive. The music is loud and pop-y andthe dance floor is littered with awful costumes and awkward people. He wouldrather stab out his eyes.

“Mybrother doesn’t dance,” Octavia says from behind them and when he turns around,he’s ready to have an aneurysm. She’s wearing an intricate bathing suit topwith a long, green sequined skirt. She has scales painted on her face. Afucking mermaid.

“When didyou pierce your belly button?” is all he can say, hating the silver piece ofjewelry currently dangling from her navel. She’s an adult, he knows that, butit’s still his baby sister and Jesus, isn’t she cold?!

“Come on,Gina,” Octavia rolls her eyes and pulls his girlfriend to the dance floor. Hestomps his way to the drink table because, yeah, it’s going to be a long night.

He decidesto start off with a Jack and Coke, because the old legends say drinking beerfirst thing is the sure way to get sick. And, okay, he’s tested that theorybefore and it is definitely accurate. He takes his spot next to the drink tableand tries to take a drink, unsuccessfully, when his ears nearly fall of hishead. Stupid costume.

“Niceoutfit,”

He turns automatically to have his suspicionsconfirmed. The Princess stands before him, pouring her drink and grinning athim like an idiot as she takes in his costume. Gina had really insisted ondressing up for this and honestly, he really wants to make her happy becauseshe’s a cool chick and he likes her a lot. So when she suggested they go asbugs bunny and Lola bunny, he wasn’t really against it. He likes Space Jam andit’s a simple costume. So he let her order a pair of bunny ears for him and lethe glue a tail to a pair of his old basketball shorts. He’s a good boyfriend.

He’s aboutto bite out a “thanks” when he notices what she’s wearing. There is no wig. Notiara. Instead her blonde hair is all natural, cut just below the chin and hereffort in a costume minimal this year. His jaw snaps shut when he reads theorange t-shirt she’s wearing. It reads, “Costume”.

“Veryfunny,” he deadpans, and it only causes her to grin in triumph.

“Thanks,”she laughs, “For the inspiration, I mean. I’m someone who hates Halloween.”

“Yeah,” herolls his eyes, “I got that.”

“Youshould be flattered,” she says as though it’s obvious, “I couldn’t have donethis without you.”

“Thanksfor the credit.”

It’sstrange how they fall into an easy conversation after that, like last year theyhadn’t been about to make out on the dance floor and she hadn’t justdisappeared. He had thought about her for weeks after that, tempted to try andfind her one way or the other. But then he met Gina and he pushed all thoughtsof the Princess away from his mind. Until now, as she stands before him in acostume influenced by his dry humor and pessimism. He can’t help but feel alittle flattered, after all.

She askshim about his year and he tells her all the fine details, issues in hisdepartment at school and getting offered to study abroad for a semester. That’ssomething he hadn’t even told Gina but with her, it comes out like it’s no bigdeal. She congratulates him on the opportunity and tells him about her ownexperience – she’s a nurse and got the opportunity to go to the Caribbean tohelp in the aftermath of a natural disaster. Talking to her makes him feel likehe’s talking to a figment of his imagination. It’s easy to get lost and that’s prettydamn scary.

He doesn’teven notice when Gina comes up behind him.

“Bell?”she asks warily, looking between him and the Princess uncomfortably. He givesher a reassuring smile.

“Hey,” heputs an arm around her and she melts into him immediately, “I was just talkingabout you.”

Mostlyabout how scared he is to tell her about being away for three months, butstill. He doesn’t want her to feel neglected or anything. He likes her. A lot.

“You wannaget out of here?” Gina asks leaning into him, her breath hot on his neck. Helooks over her head for a moment to at least say goodbye to the Princess, maybeeven get her name because now she knows a little too much about him. But she’sgone already, having slipped away as Gina rolled into them. He turns hisattention back to his girlfriend and gives her soft kiss.

“Sure.”

2016

“I cameall the way here to go to this stupid rooftop party, so you’re going to takeme!”

RavenReyes is a lot of things. A spitfire, for one, ready to kick any and everyone’sass at any given moment. She’s also demanding, something he learned early on intheir friendship to deal with. Except today. Because he’s really not in thefucking mood.

“Go withOctavia,” he mutters under his breath, clicking into the next episode of NewGirl without a second thought. It’s once again his least favorite holiday andhe had a really shitty day at work. It’s his first semester as a teacher at thehigh school and the kids were extra rambunctious today. He’s got one hell of aheadache.

“Bellamy,get your ass up and let’s go,” she yanks the remote from his hand and begins topull on his arms, “You can wear your stupid ironic t-shirt for all I care,we’re going.”

He findshimself on the roof again. It’s been a year of ups and downs for him. Hestudied abroad in Greece, which has to be the highlight because it is probablythe second best experience of his life (the first being when he held his babysister for the first time – he’s a sap and he doesn’t care). He graduated withhis Master’s in history and had just begun his first teaching gig. On thedownside, Octavia moved in with her boyfriend, Lincoln, and he had to paydouble the rent for almost three months before finding a new roommate. His nameis John Murphy and he’s almost positive he’s a sociopath, but a cool sociopathonce you get to know him. Gina also broke up with him about three weeks beforehe left for his trip. Long distance wasn’t really her thing. He doesn’t blameher.

Ravendecided to come visit him for the first time in two years, mostly because sheand her boyfriend just broke up and she needed time away. But also because shemissed him and he had been in a foul mood for the past few months and neededcheering up.

He makeshis way to the drink table and takes up his usual post after introducing Ravento all the regulars. When he introduces her to Luna, his downstairs neighbor,well, it’s all over from there. He doesn’t see Raven again that night. Butthat’s not the part that bothers him. He spends over an hour at the drink tableand she never shows. The princess who copied his costume and who learned hisdeepest secrets before his fucking name. He thought maybe this would become athing. Like maybe she’s supposed to show up and talk him through his crisisevery Halloween. It’s a stupid expectation. Hell, he’s not even positive she’sreal.

Hefinishes four drinks before giving up and going home. Fuck Halloween.

2017

“Pleasewear it!”

He staresat the offending garment like he’s hoping to burn a hole through it,“Absolutely not.”

“You’lllook so hot!”

“Ew,please don’t ever say that again.”

Ravenhuffs at her roommate. He’s being stubborn, he knows that, but she knows how hefeels about costumes and she’s trying to force him to be part of a groupcostume which is just…it’s fucking cheesy.

“Please!”she begs, adjusting her own pink jackets as she pulls her hands together in aplea, “Even Murphy is doing it! Emori!”

She wantshim to dress up as one of the guys from Grease, leather jacket, hair gel, andtight pants. It’s a bit over the top if you ask him. He hates it. He shouldhave known this is how things would go when she moved in – what Raven wants,Raven gets. After last year, she decided to move to New York to be closer toher friends. She’d never admit it, but he also thinks it has something to dowith Luna. The two aren’t official by any means, but they spend a lot of timetogether. Raven says she isn’t into labels, so whatever, but he knows the girlcares about her.

“I don’tremember ever saying I would be a part of this, you just signed me up,” hepoints out. She had brought it to him as soon as he got home from work. She didhappen to catch him a good day, mostly because there were no students at work(it was an in-service day which meant he had a quiet classroom all to hisself). But going as the cast of Greaseis a sure way of bringing his good mood down.

“We’re alldoing it,” she argues again, “Besides, this is going to be the biggest partyyet! Miller is proposing to Monty!”

He knowsthis. Miller has already been to his apartment to freak out on numerousoccasions. They’ve been dating for almost seven years but only recently hasmarriage been legalized in all fifty states and they feel comfortable enough todo it. He’s happy for them and they honestly make him believe that love doesexist – they’re a good match and he knows how happy Monty makes him.

“I’m notdoing it.”

Thirtyminutes later, he finds himself on the fucking roof again with the leatherjacket slung over his shoulders. Raven can be very persuasive. They’re standingin the group and he realizes how much thought Raven really did put into this.Everyone is here and dressed up – Murphy and Emori, Octavia and Lincoln, Millerand Monty. Hell, even Luna came dressed as a Pink Lady.

“Where thehell is Clarke?” Raven hisses to Luna when she arrives. He has no idea whoClarke is, but Raven has already made more friends in her short time here thanhe has since he moved in. So, no surprises there.

“She’salways late, you know that,” Luna rolls her eyes, “She’ll be here.”

“Yo,Danny,” Raven calls and it takes him a moment to realize she’s talking to him,“Go grab me a beer.”

“I’m sorry,are you incapable?” he snaps and runs a hand through his hair, only for hisfingers to get stuck in the hair gel.

She flipshim the finger and he shuffles over to the table. Not because she told him too,he was already going to come here. He’ll just be nice and grab her a beer whilehe’s over here. Because he’s polite. And definitely not because she told himto. He reaches into the cooler to dig around for his favorite – he’s stickingto beer tonight. He has to teach in the morning.

He feels afamiliar pull and knows she’s there before she speaks.

“Wow,” shesays as he stands up, the buckles of his jacket clanking together, “Niceoutfit.”

He turnsslowly and before he can control it, his jaw opens slightly. It’s the Princess,alright, except she isn’t a princess at all. She’s dressed in a tight blackbody suit, and it’s clinging to every luscious curve of her body, paired with aleather jacket eerily similar to his own. He’s seen Grease enough time torecognize a Sandy when he sees one. He practically chokes on air. He looks overhis head to see the others watching him and Raven is looking extremely smugwhich makes him think she had something to do with this. He has no idea how shecould know, or how she could possibly be involved. But if anybody could figureit out, it’s her.

“I’mLuna’s roommate,” she seems to read his mind and she extends her hand with ahalf-smile, “Clarke Griffin.”

“Youweren’t here last year,” he says stupidly. He should introduce himself.Compliment her outfit because, damn. But all he can think about is that shewasn’t here last year.

She dropsher hand and glances down at her feet sheepishly, “I was working. New nursesalways have to work holidays.”

“Oh,” heresponds and still can’t figure out what to say. She’s been living in thisbuilding the whole time and he never once ran into her? She never tried to findhim despite their almost hook up two three years ago? Holy shit this has beengoing on that long?

“I guessthis is as weird for you as it is for me?” she asks, “I can leave, if you want.I know we’ve kind of been like…weirdly intimate but don’t really know eachother? And, honestly, I gave up when you showed up with a girlfriend but nowyou’re here and Raven said you’re single and you look really hot in thatcostume…”

It’s thisprecise moment that his brain actually decides to function and he laughs,watching as this girl he’s been dancing around for four years on the same dayrambles away about their strange relationship and admittedly having a crush onhim, similar to the way he’s felt about her. She’s been sort of his own littletradition – like every Halloween he goes to the roof to talk to this mysteriousgirl about all the things he was afraid to admit outloud to everyone else. Andshe’s fucking real and standing in front of him in a matching costume because,surpise, she actually knows his friends and lives two floors below him. Whatare the fucking odds.

He’shaving a hard time processing it all and wants to claim insanity when he slidesa hand into her thick curls and surges forward to kiss her. She stiffens and hepulls away, heart pounding in his chest and feeling completely disoriented.

“Shit,that was weird,” he panics, “I’m Bellamy. But you probably already know thatand…God, I’m sorry.”

She laughsthen, sweet and shy as her eyes search his own frantic ones, “No offense,Bellamy, but we’ve been talking for four years. Aren’t you tired?”

Shedoesn’t need to ask twice. He kisses her again and faintly hears the PinkLadies and the T-birds in the background hooting and hollering in theirapproval. It’s bizarre. But Halloween is a bizarre holiday and honestly, hemight not hate it so much after all.

#liz answers #my writing #bellarke fanfiction #halloween au #bellarke prompt fill #im sorry #idk how good this is but i loved the idea lol

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