#at least they were easier to color T_T

[rjshope]

Namjoon vibing to Tae's "Slow Dancing"

[twstmemories]

Hello! I'd like to request for a drabble (or headcanons if it's easier for you) where the reader tries to give lots to jewels to Azul! Where did the reader get the jewels? No one knows~ Thanks in advance if you do this. ๑(◕‿◕)๑

-- ! how about i do both? i feel like a drabble would be easier to write for me once i've established a few headcanons that are a drabble in themselves but i don't have to worry about sentence starters or a proper flow HAHA

i am- so sorry for the delay of this. and for all the next updates t_t

✧ Azul Ashengrotto's reaction to the reader giving him jewels [headcanons & drabble]

✧ gn!reader

Is highly suspicious when you first come to him with your hands behind your back. He knows you mean no harm to, but he's always on his toes. (￢_￢)

Will look at you with a raised eyebrow, he won't immediately question you which indicates that: yes, this is your time to fess up and tell him what you're hiding.

But when you don't fess up what you're hiding behind your back, he gets a tiny bit impatient. As much as he would like to humor you he does not have all the time in the world - But his worries to get a bit quenched when he sees that there is no ulterior motive painting your lips, just a tiny mischevious smile. (─‿‿─)

He will humor you for a few more minutes, tilting his head a bit more to see what you're hiding even though he's well aware that what you're hiding is further hidden by a small bag. But time is precious, and Azul is a busy man. So after humoring you he will lean back in his chair and cross his legs before eyeing you with a raised eyebrow: "Now then, care to tell me why you keep hiding something behind your back now?"

You hum, swaying back and forth in your place and Azul could tell that you knew that you were testing his patience, but the two of you have played this game of cat and mouse before with both parties emerging victorious numerous times - he could afford to spend some more time toying around.

"If I were to somewhat get close to guessing what you're keeping behind your back, would you at least yield and show what is that you're hiding?" Azul offers, and he sees the familiar smile of yours that signals another game of guessing is about to happen.

"Why what would I be, if not a benevolent dealer for my client?" you tease, Azul rolling his eyes knowing you're imitating him in some twisted way.

Was there something Azul was in need of lately? You usually have a keen sense of perception and hearing, noticing whenever he would mutter that a certain ink he like has run out or that he's stack of papers are in need of restocking.

But there are no materialistic objects that Azul was in need of as of right now at least: "Is it something that is of use to me?" he decides in to ask in the end, and you just shake your head as a response.

A decorative item then, "... A shell of some sort?" he questions, and when you stop swaying and tilt your head to process the answer, Azul knows that for this round, he has won.

"Sorta?" you say with a giggle, walking up to his desk to place the small bag on top of it, Azul can hear the various sounds of something clicking against eac other, and stares curiosuly at the bag as he watches you untie the ribbon holding the contents together.

And out from the concealed bag, falls a variety of colorful jewels, some more rounded to look like a sleek stone, and some carved to make the light shine in any direction. Some big and some incredibly small: "... Jewels?"

"Yup!" you confirm, bringing up a few of the bigger ones: "You can use some as a paper weight, since I've often seen the mere air from Floyd bursing into the VIP room cause all of your stacks to fly everywhere, some are just decorative pieces, maybe you can place them in some of the tanks for some extra pieces to blend with the environment," you say, giving Azul a smile while the merman just stares at you, blinking in confusion.

"Is- Is there a reason for this?" he asks in the end, and you only blink before laughing: "I can't give you something out of my own volition?" you tease, and Azul huffs, cheeks a bit red: "... Thank you, I'll make sure to place them in places where they can shine the most."

[spaceyflowerswriting]

2 dorks (jace park x reader)

details: fluffy oneshot, gender neutral reader, general canon au, you and jace are classmates secretly pining for each other

summary: you and jace have a painfully awkward 3 am talk over the phone.

a/n: this is basically for anon that was curious about if i had written jace before ! here's my first attempt ^_^

also shoutout to this song for giving me the inspiration and strength to finish this T_T

×

There were a lot of times Jace wished Burn Knuckles was... a little smarter, to say the least. Like, a lot. But other times he was glad they were oblivious and dense. This was definitely one of those times. Unfortunately other people around still noticed, but Jace was only teased from time to time so he didn't mind too much.

What did they notice? Well, his crush, of course. It's not like he made it obvious or anything, he--yeah, no, it was pretty obvious. The longer he was crushing on you and the stronger his feelings grew, it was getting harder for him to act as if he didn't harbor romantic feelings for you. The worst part was he was beginning to think you were noticing, too. And he wasn't sure if the feeling was mutual.

He didn't really know what to do with himself after realizing that. Logically, he could just waltz up to you and ask you out, but that's easier said than done. Not to mention, he didn't want to ruin anything between you two. Being your friend was the only way he could see your charming smile up close and have fun, casual conversations with you. How could he possibly risk losing that?

And so he thought about what to do for a solid month, before ultimately deciding he'd be fine as staying your friend. Plus, if he had to be honest, he didn't even think he'd fall in love with you so this would probably be fine. After all, you two were just classmates and he didn't think by continuing to interact with you and then befriending you would land him in a friends-to-lovers story.

Ahem, that is if you say yes to when he asks you out. Which he won't.

Probably.

"Argh, no, I said I wouldn't!"

"Jace?"

"Huh?" Jace blinked himself back awake. He had fallen asleep?

"Were you... sleep talking...?"

"Uhhh... maybe?" What the hell did he just experience? Some dream retelling of his current situation? Whatever it was, he shook his head as if trying to shake away the sleepiness in him and readjusted himself in bed. "Sorry for the noise," he murmured, picking his phone up and laying it by his head instead of by his torso where it had slipped. "And sorry if I did sleep talk." A second passed before he worriedly asked, "I--I didn't say anything weird, did I?"

"Nah," your voice replied, soft laughter following afterwards. "You know, if you're tired, you can go to sleep."

"But I like hearing you talk." Jace cringed a little with how quickly he responded.

"Then why'd you fall asleep~?"

He groaned hearing the teasing tone of your voice as his cheeks colored in a little red. He could just imagine the cute grin on your face. "I guess I'm tired. Not of you, though."

"What am I saying?!" Cue the internal screaming. "Maybe I should head to sleep... I might say something I'll regret in this state."

His heart pounded in anticipation at the sudden silence at the other end of the line.

Pro of voice calls: you couldn't see him blushing.

Con of voice calls: he couldn't see your expressions and guess what you were thinking or planning to say.

"Well... good to know you're not tired of me." A pause. "Um... you think you'll ever get tired of me?"

"No...?" You laughed after his response, and Jace could actually tell it was nervous laughter. It took him a while to register it though because he wasn't sure what you were nervous about. "If you're worried about that, you don't have to. Like I said, I like listening to you talk. About anything, really."

"Huh." At least you sounded a little more content now. "Is that why you've been having these late night talks with me?"

"Mhm. Well, we've been having them for a while though, haven't we?"

"A few months maybe? I don't know, I just started talking longer than usual one night and it became a pattern I guess."

Jace hummed. "I talk, too, y'know."

"Right, right, late night conversations, not late night speeches from me. I did say talks."

After a playful eyeroll, Jace turned to lay on his side, facing his phone. "Yeah, and you also just said, 'I just started talking longer than usual one night.'"

"Don't get smart with me," you playfully snapped, before the two of you shared a laugh. There was a peaceful moment of silence that followed. Jace nearly fell asleep again until your voice called his name.

"Hm?" He was shaking his head like before as if that would help wake him up.

"I, uh. Need to ask you one last question. And then we can both sleep afterwards. I don't know if now's the right time but I don't think I'll get the nerves to ask any other time."

"Um... ask away." Nervousness creeped its way into Jace as possibilities ran through his mind. If only he could feel more prepared for whatever was coming his way.

"We're just friends... right?"

Oh dear. Now that was a possibility Jace thought of, but also one of the many he didn't mentally prepare himself for. He ended up just keeping quiet, unsure of what to reply with. There were lots of ways things could go wrong. Or... right.

"Jace?"

"Yeah?"

"Did you hear my question?"

"Yes."

"...And your response is?"

While the emotional side of Jace was panicking, his logical side took over to say, "Yeah. I mean, that's our current status," which only made his emotional side even more panicked.

"Right." You quietly cleared your throat. "Thanks, I just wanted to make sure. About. That."

"Oh... yeah? Cool."

"Uh-huh."

"God, I wish Vasco was here to break the tension or something."

Jace gulped as he shuffled in his bed again, turning to lay on his back now. "So... that's all?"

"Yup. Uh, good night."

"Yeah, you, too. Good night. And sweet dr--" His phone made a small beeping sound before he finished which mildly surprised him. He laughed a little when his phone buzzed next and he didn't have to check to know it was an apology text from you. Still, he went to pick his phone up, holding it above his face.

"I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to cut you off! I thought you were done after 'good night!'"

"Don't worry about it. Sweet dreams! That's all I wanted to say."

"Oh, okay. Back at you, then!"

A soft smile was on Jace's face as he went to give your text a thumbs up. He ended up misclicking though, and unintentionally hearted your text instead. In another state of panic, he dropped his phone on his face.

"Ow!"

He rushed to sit up and give your text the right reaction. Then, immediately flopped back down, sighing heavily. "Why am I like this," he muttered, cheeks feeling warm. He stared at the ceiling for a few seconds before letting out another sigh and slowly forcing himself to get out of bed to charge his phone. After that, he headed straight back to bed and pulled his blanket over his head.

He had no idea if this conversation would be brought up the next time you two talk, but he hoped it wouldn't. Just to save himself and you the embarrassnent. But maybe that awkward talk was what both of you needed to set things straight.

Nah. It was definitely what you two dorks needed.

[rkived]

━ CHASING PAVEMENTS 02 | JJK

↳ PAIRING: dad!jk/married!jk/bff!jk x reader (ft. taehyung) 

↳ GENRE/TAGS: f2l, angst, unrequited feelings au, cheating au, future smut 

↳ WARNINGS: (for this chapter)  time jumps  (but it’s not so bad this time aha) mentions of a troubled marriage, mentions of postpartum depression, mentions of alcohol consumption, cheating!!! (obviously don’t do that y’all), a kinda hot makeout session

↳ WORD COUNT: 8.5k

↳ EXCERPT: ‘‘Jungkook shouldn’t be thinking about you, especially on the day of his fourth wedding anniversary to the woman he chose as his wife.’’ 

↳ A/N: hello!! first of all thanks so much for the love on pt 1 of cp like T_T anyway cp was supposed to be two pts only but as i wrote this chapter i realized that if i ended it on just two parts it would’ve been rushed sooo there’s a part 3 in the works! as always, feedback is much appreciated thx!! <3

01 | 02 | 03

Taehyung finally found a dog-sitter for his dog, Yeontan, or Tannie, like you had begun calling him, after being introduced to him via FaceTime. 

He’s been wanting to stay the night over at your place for a while now. Things would get a little heated between you two every time he dropped you off after a night out. But just as you were about to pull him inside your apartment, he’d apologize and explain that he couldn’t stay because his dog was waiting for him at home.

A teacup Pomeranian cockblocked you for a whole month. 

But tonight’s finally the night, Taehyung and you have just finished a bottle of wine together and the Netflix movie you had both started watching had been paused so you two could focus on kissing each other properly, no background voices to interrupt. 

Taehyung is sweet, but not when he kisses. It’s fast and desperate. As if every time he places his lips on you it’ll be his last. They’re still enjoyable, though. He already knows what places to kiss to make you weak at the knees, he pays extra attention to them. 

His hair is a nice length and it’s soft, making your fingers curl into his locks easier. He likes the little tugs you’d give him absent-mindedly, always provoking small groans to come out of his mouth, which in exchange make you moan because his voice seems to get deeper when he gets in the mood.

Your phone’s been vibrating for a few seconds, but you ignore it, not wanting anything or anyone to ruin this for you and him. Eventually, your phone stops and you’re thankful.

Taehyung is midway into kissing and niping over your collarbone’s skin when you hear the doorbell ring. Maybe it’s because you’re both way in the heat of the moment to realize, but it’s not until it’s rang a few more times that you mutter a curse and your date sighs at the interruption.

“I swear to━! If it’s the landlord I’m sending him straight to hell.” you mumble exasperated and Taehyung chuckles, finding your irritation cute. His lips still feel electric, like you're still on them and he’s dying to have you back under him.

You huff and peek into your door’s peep-hole, already preparing to curse out the person on the other side. But you find yourself surprised at the fisheye lens sight of Jungkook with Sunhi in his arms.

It’s not Friday, what is he doing here?, you wonder. Immediately figuring out something’s wrong, Jungkook never comes to your place on days that are not Sunhi’s babysitting days. He hadn’t let you know about any change of plans either.

You open the door without any second thought and find him tickling Sunhi’s belly as she giggles at the action. You eye him and he smiles at your sight, but his face immediately changes once he notices your appearance.

You’re not looking ugly, actually, you’re beautiful. Your makeup is done and he can tell you probably went to the salon to get your hair blown out. But it’s the way your nude pink lipstick is slightly smudged and your hair's a little messy. There are wet patches on your neck and red spots around your collarbones. 

“Jungkook?” You speak once you notice he hasn’t explained the reason for his surprise visit, standing there like he had just seen a ghost “Did something happen?” 

Yes, something is happening inside of him, but that’s not what you’re asking. Sunhi’s gentle touch on his cheek makes him land back in reality and he has to slightly shake his head “I—uh, called you a few times” is what he comes up with. 

Taehyung notices you’re taking a little more time on the door and your voice isn’t raised, which means that it’s not the landlord who you’re dealing with. He stands up and makes his way through the hallway, leaning on the wall as he notices a tall figure looking at you with surprising eyes. There’s a little girl with him and Taehyung immediately realizes this is your friend, the one whose daughter you look out for. 

“Sorry, I was a little busy” you reply, but Jungkook’s eyes raise to look somewhere that’s not you and he notices the lingering figure of Kim Taehyung. 

Of course, this is his doing. Who else would have access to make you look like this? Little busy means you were in the process of sleeping with him 

“But is there something wrong?” you ask again, your attention placed on the little girl in his arms that remains silent, waiting for the right moment so she can show her true colors. 

“Uh—I think it’s best we go” Jungkook clears his throat, nodding his head over at Taehyung who is still waiting and watching what’s happening. You turn around and notice him, who in exchange gives you a reassuring smile. “Oh!” you’re reminded of what was going on no longer than a few minutes ago “Jungkook, is everything okay?” you ask once again.

He nods and forces a smile out of him “Just thought we could give a surprise visit to Auntie Y/N, right pumpkin?” Jungkook says looking over at the girl in his arms and his daughter nods, but her face is glued to his neck. She’s feeling shy and it’s rare for her to be that way. “Really, Y/N, it’s fine,” he reassures you, closer this time and you force yourself to nod “sorry for interrupting”. 

You can’t even give Sunhi a kiss goodbye or a pat on her back because Jungkook turns around and goes back to where he came from. 

Closing the door with a sigh, Taehyung comes up and embraces you in his arms, chin resting over your head. “Everything alright?” he asks and you hum, not sure of what just happened. “This is such a mood killer, I’m sorry.” you mumble and he smiles sweetly “Not at all,” he answers and you’re thankful for his comprehension “was that Sunhi?” he wonders, at this point slightly familiar with the sight of the little girl due to all the videos you send to him whenever you’re babysitting. You nod and he hums, swaying you from side to side slowly. 

“Want to finish watching the movie?” Taehyung offers and you twist your face, you no longer remember what the plot is about nor do you have the will to. “Want a massage and some kisses?” his tone is playful and you giggle at his proposal, nodding your head quickly and taking him to your bedroom.

It’s Jungkook’s and Jiwoo’s four year wedding anniversary and it’s also their seven-year dating mark. Jungkook really thought he was being romantic by proposing on the same date as their dating anniversary.

He’s spending it with Sunhi at a fast-food restaurant that’s practically soulless besides him and her, the kitchen staff too; who are probably upset they got clients at this hour.

Jungkook didn’t think he was going to spend the night this way. Well, he figured he was going to spend this day by himself, his daughter to keep him company. Out of the four years of marriage, they’ve only celebrated it once, a few months before Sunhi’s birth. It wasn’t extremely fancy, but it was nice. He still remembers because it feels like one of the most, if not the only, memorable times of their marriage. Before things went south.

He woke up that morning to a reminder on his phone that today was his wedding anniversary. It’s shitty to admit, but if it weren’t for that notification he probably would’ve forgotten. But at least Jungkook set a reminder, because once he went into the kitchen to wish Jiwoo a congratulations for another year together—

“Oh, that’s today?” She asks in surprise, quickly finishing her breakfast smoothie so she can rush off to work. 

Jungkook doesn’t feel bad, they’re in the same position in the end. They don’t care about this anymore, but pretend they do. It wasn’t always like this. He still wonders what went wrong. At first, he blamed himself for most of the issues surrounding their relationship. Every argument that happened, he’d apologize even if he wasn’t in the wrong. If Jiwoo was in a bad mood, he figured it was something he had done that made his wife angry enough to curse him out. 

Dealing with Jiwoo’s behavior didn’t really bother him for the most part. He had dated her for three years prior to proposing, he knew what he was getting himself into. Marriage wasn’t as different. Things took a turn after she got pregnant with Sunhi. 

They had discussed it, the having kids thing. Sunhi did come a little earlier than expected, but they wanted her nonetheless. Pregnancy wasn’t easy for either of them. Jiwoo went through the biggest mood swings and worst morning sickness ever and Jungkook was on the receiving end of the stick. But he didn’t care, because he knew Jiwoo had it worse. Things would get better once their daughter arrived, he hoped.

And they did. For a few months, that is. 

Jiwoo did her mom duties the first months of Sunhi’s life and then she was back to work. There was nothing wrong with that, Jungkook knew his wife was making sacrifices in between balancing her new mom life and the one she had before. She had just gone through nine months of pain, it was okay if Jiwoo wanted to go back to her normal life. 

The problem was that Jiwoo’s normal life didn’t involve Sunhi. It’s not like she didn’t show her signs of affection, but Jungkook always felt like they came out forced. As if Jiwoo was aware that she was a mom and she had to live up to the name. A chore, even. 

And then on one of those cold nights, when their daughter was fast asleep, they were arguing with the lowest voices possible. Jungkook just wanted to understand what was happening, why wasn’t Jiwoo acting like he thought a mom should.

“I just—I don’t feel a connection towards her!” 

That was the beginning of the next few years of their marriage. 

It didn’t matter how many times Jungkook tried to explain to her that she most likely had postpartum depression—after much research online about patterns of behavior that his wife had displayed—, if anything it only made things worse. One time he even suggested looking for professional help and hell broke loose, as in, Jiwoo slept at her parents’ place for a few days without further announcement. 

He begged her to come back. If she swore nothing was wrong, then so it was. And Jungkook had made the silly mistake back then to prefer having Jiwoo in Sunhi’s life, cold and distant, than not having her at all. He thought that if she wasn’t present, then someday his daughter would resent him for pushing her mother away. In reality, Jiwoo was physically there, but neither of them could feel her. 

But a few months back, it was Jiwoo who had suggested the idea of having a day of their own. Without Sunhi, obviously. She wanted to go back to those college dating days where it was just them and no one else. Jungkook wasn’t too fond of the idea at first, not wanting to leave his daughter out of it, but Jiwoo whined and said—

“Let’s have Y/N look after her! She’s like, obsessed with the girl.” She, as in you. “It’ll only be one day a week—c’mon baby, for us”.

Except Jungkook wasn’t doing things for them anymore, hadn’t been in a long time. Every decision he took revolved around Sunhi. That’s what set them apart so much. Jiwoo acted like she wasn’t a mom, like there wasn’t supposed to be a three-year-old under her care. It was “Jiwoo first” and then maybe Sunhi and him. 

But back then, he was willing to give it a try. For Sunhi. 

It’s been six months since then. Fridays are still their days, but Jungkook doesn’t want to share that with her anymore.

Jungkook thought that those “alone times” Jiwoo had offered were meant for them to talk and discuss their problems, figure out their issues and fix them. But instead, all they do is continue arguing about something and then make-up with sex. And then it’s back to normal. He’s come to the conclusion that she does it on purpose just to get what she wants. 

Sunhi loves Fridays because it’s “Auntie Y/N playtime” days and Jungkook loves dropping her off because you are just as equally excited to see her. There’s not much exchanged between each of you during those times. Maybe a quick “hey, how are you?” or a nod of your heads in acknowledgement of each other. 

He doesn’t want to go back home when he drops Sunhi off. He wishes he could stay with you both. Spend some time with his daughter and his best friend and see what genuine love is supposed to feel like. He hates the drive back to his place because he has to mentally prepare himself to deal with Jiwoo for a couple of hours. 

The silver lining out of those dreadful Fridays is getting to see you. At least for a few minutes. Jungkook is able to see you smile and laugh with his daughter. He gets to feel the love you give her and he’s thankful you’re still there. Maybe not for him, but for her. 

Jungkook shouldn’t be thinking about you, especially on the fourth year wedding anniversary to the woman he chose as his wife. 

But he’s in this fast-food restaurant late at night with Sunhi, who’s munching on some fries as she does a little happy dance. Jiwoo had announced to him after the whole “Congratulations on four years” that she had planned a road trip with her friends, totally forgetting about the date, she was leaving at noon. He is glad, but it stings having to spend this day alone, even if there’s no feelings there anymore.

Which is why he thought about the marvelous idea —at the time— to drop by your place with Sunhi as a surprise. You don’t know what date is today, never bothering to ask about the details of his relationship. Jungkook figured that the only person who could actually give him genuine love today could’ve been you. 

But of course you’re still going out with Kim Taehyung. Of course you’re letting him stay at your place. Of course your skin is getting kissed inch by inch because of him and of course you're having him over during Jungkook’s wedding anniversary.

It feels like the universe is mocking him in a way. 

Sunhi reaches out with her ketchup covered fingers, handing her dad a nugget with a smile. Jungkook politely accepts it, bowing to her, making the little girl giggle. 

“Daddy,” Sunhi speaks and Jungkook nods, allowing her to continue “who was that mister with Auntie Y/N?” she asks and he hums, not really wanting to speak about him with his daughter, but he’s never opposed to Sunhi’s curiosity. Jungkook clears his throat and puts his hands together, his daughter looking at him with expectancy “That mister is a friend of Auntie Y/N’s”. 

Jungkook wonders if Kim Taehyung is still considered your friend. It’s been a little while since you had been on your first date with him, but you never mentioned anything more to Jungkook. He knew he had fucked up that night he texted you after the date. So if he’s your boyfriend now, Jungkook is not aware. 

“Oh!” Sunhi says, her eyes light up and Jungkook knows what she’s about to say “I want to meet Auntie Y/N’s friend!” His daughter’s innocence is cute and he wishes she could stay this way forever.

All in all, Jungkook is thankful to Jiwoo. 

She doesn’t provide him with love anymore and she doesn’t care about how he feels or what he thinks either. But at least she gave him Sunhi, the sweetest girl ever and he’s lucky that out of all the mess that is his relationship with his wife, Sunhi turned out the total opposite.

“Mmm, I don’t know, pumpkin.” Jungkook hums before taking a bite of his burger. “Why not, daddy?” she questions and he knows she’s being serious, Sunhi could ‘why?’ you to death sometimes. “I don’t think Auntie Y/N is going to introduce us to him soon” 

Jungkook knows that he’s speaking to a three-year-old and he knows Sunhi better than anyone, so saying that is not going to turn out well for him. 

“Why not, daddy?” She asks again, there’s a furrow in her brows and she’s crossing her arms. “Pumpkin, how about I buy you an ice-cream and—“ “Please, tell me!” she demands and he sighs, knowing he set himself up for this. 

Before Jungkook can open his mouth to make up a story, Sunhi’s eyes open in surprise and she holds her hands out “Wait! Daddy!” she speaks and Jungkook stops and waits for her to continue “Is he the husband Auntie Y/N is going to have a baby with?”

God damnit, Jiwoo.

“I—uh,” Jungkook is rendered speechless, but Sunhi is smiling with delight at the idea of that hypothetical baby her mother had settled on her weeks ago. “Yes, daddy?” she flashes him a toothy grin and he slumps his shoulders, what point did it have now? 

“Yeah, pumpkin, that’s him.” he forces a smile and Sunhi jumps in her seat with excitement.

He doesn’t like lying to his daughter. It might be a little white lie in the end, but Jungkook hates it. It won’t matter in a while, Sunhi will probably end up forgetting it. But the probability of that white lie coming true feels awfully plausible to him. 

I’m being dramatic, Jungkook thinks. He knows it’s just the events of the night that are influencing his judgement. 

It’s okay if you’re dating Kim Taehyung, he shouldn’t be thinking about that anyway because you’re his friend and he’s married, four years since the event and seven since he decided you were never going to be his. 

Sunhi’s happy and she holds onto him tightly once they both leave the fast-food establishment. She smiles at him with sleepy eyes and thanks her dad for the food. 

Jungkook knows that he’s being dramatic.

He does receive genuine love and it comes in the form of his three-year-old daughter, whose sticky fingers are making a mess of the Dumbo plush toy he had washed earlier that week.

Jungkook is grateful nonetheless.

“Okay, okay, tell me everything!” Minji’s voice is filled with excitement early in the morning and you’re afraid she’ll somehow manage to wake Taehyung up, even if you’re talking through a phone outside your bedroom.

“Is he big? Or is he girthy? Oh! Is he both? Oh my God, he’s both right?” 

You sigh at your friend’s rapid questioning, not even being able to answer because she continues speaking “Is he like, dominant? He totally looks like a dom” At this point, you’re sure she’s talking to herself rather than you, so you wait for her to stop.

“What are you waiting for, then? Spill!” 

You roll your eyes, luckily she can’t see you “That’s what I was trying to do.” you mumble and Minji mutters a quick sorry “We actually didn’t—uh, do it” you confess in a low voice, afraid that you may wake up the subject of your conversation, who still lays in your bed sleeping.

“WHAT?!” 

You’re glad Minji isn’t physically here, her reaction alone would’ve been enough to wake the whole apartment building “But, you told me he got a dog-sitter and all that just so he could spend the night and blow your brains out!” You actually hadn’t said it like that, but the context was correct. “What happened? Oh my God, don’t tell me you backed out” Minji’s tone is slightly angry, you can feel she’s about to curse you out if that was the case.

“No! Ugh, can you let me finish?” You complain and she’s apologizing again, explaining that these sorts of situations get her a little overexcited “Well, we were in the process of getting to it, but—“ 

You think to yourself if it’s a good decision to tell Minji what happened, knowing exactly what her reaction was going to be. 

“Uh-huh? Go on.”

Fuck it.

“Jungkook dropped by.” you quickly spill out and Minji’s groan is powerful, you know she’s genuinely upset “Unannounced, which is super weird of him to do too! So, I asked him if there was something wrong and he just looked at me, like, shocked or something and said that he just wanted to give me a surprise visit with Sunhi,”

“And then he saw Taehyung and apologized for interrupting and left,” you mutter, the scene repeating itself in your brain “I couldn’t even say bye to her.”

There’s silence and you wonder why Minji hasn’t said anything yet, knowing she probably wants hell to break loose on Jungkook. “So, that’s why me and Tae didn’t do anything, it was too...awkward? He still stayed the night, though.”

After the whole ordeal, you knew the night was ruined. In part it was because of you. You could’ve jumped back to where you both left off, but your head was filled with what had just happened with your friend and were no longer able to concentrate on Taehyung’s kisses. You had to give it to him, though, because he stuck around even if his plans for the night had been interrupted.

And sleeping with Taehyung still felt intimate, even if there was nothing sexual going on. He held onto you tightly before you could close your eyes and drift to sleep, being surprised by how comfortable he felt doing that.  “I have to sleep hugging something,” he explained and you nodded, understanding “plus, I like the way you smell” he added, burying his head in the crook of your neck, sniffing the expensive perfume you had sprayed earlier while you prepared for his arrival. Chuckling, your fingers found themselves brushing his hair until he fell asleep. 

“So, are you gonna say something?” you ask her, noticing the silence coming from her behalf, unusual from Minji. 

She sighs and you can feel she’s conflicted about what to tell you “Why is he like that?” she asked instead and you let out a breathless chuckle, wondering the same thing “The timing is so weird, as well. Like, he never stops by unless it’s to drop Sunhi off and the day he decides he’ll visit you for the fun of it, you’re having Taehyung over?” Minji’s suspicion sounds plausible, but you know it was just a coincidence.

You hadn’t mentioned to him anything about Taehyung, not after what happened that one time during texts. Jungkook was your friend, but you should’ve kept that from him. He was a married man and a father, he had other priorities in his life and the last thing he wanted was to know who and what you were involved with. 

“He knows he’s losing you.” Minji speaks and you’re surprised by her statement, not understanding fully what she meant “You’ve always been there for him, always. It’s been that way since college,” You don’t know if Minji is reprimanding you by the way her tone comes off “And now you’re not only there for him, but for his daughter too. I’m sure he’s used to you somehow being loyal to him, so now that you have another guy in your life—“

“No, Minji, look—“ 

“No, I’m right, Y/N” Minji interrupts you doing the same to her. 

But you know she’s not right. Have you been loyal to Jungkook? Yes, but just like you’ve been loyal to Minji too, because she’s your friend and you’ll do that for anyone you love as well. You’ve dated guys before, back in college and after too. This isn’t any different from that. 

“I don’t know who he’s trying to fool, but his marriage’s an argument away from ending up in divorce. You know it.” Minji continues and you let out a sigh, not wanting to think about that. You don’t like his relationship with Jiwoo, but you’d never wish that for him “I’m not gonna make crazy assumptions, in the end, I don’t like the guy and whatever I say will be against him” Minji’s humor makes you chuckle even through the heavy topic “but I just—I don’t know, I don’t want him to ruin what you have going on with Taehyung just because you’re concerned over what’s going on with him.” 

You eventually hang up on her, explaining that you have a few things to do around the apartment. Like cleaning up the glasses of wine and cheese table you and Taehyung had drank and eaten last night. 

Minji’s words do resonate with you. 

She has a point, you think.

Maybe Jungkook doesn’t share much of his life with you, but you’ll always be there for him. You’ll be there for him even if you have no clue what’s going on. You’ll be there when he needs help with Sunhi, because you love her just as much. You’ll be there when he decides to open up more about his marriage to Jiwoo and you’ll pretend you support the relationship even if you don’t. 

You just want him to be happy. 

Jungkook is doing the bimonthly grocery shopping, Sunhi’s sitting on the cart’s baby seat as she plays with her plush toy. He’s picking between what fabric softener to take this time, the Downy he loves is sold out.

His phone vibrates in his pocket and he figures that it’s Jiwoo with a last minute request. He’s surprised to see it’s you, who he hasn’t talked to since that eventful night he dropped by last week.

He knows why you’re texting and he’s already figuring out what to say.

[6:47 PM] Y/N: hey it’s friday

[6:47 PM] Y/N: u didn’t text me anything abt dropping sunhi off today sooo...

[6:47 PM] Y/N: guess i’m wondering if i’ll see her tonight? 

Jungkook figured that you’ll be busier now, so he wants to limit Sunhi’s days. Much to Jiwoo’s distaste of not having all Fridays with him alone, but he explained that you now had a boyfriend and needed those Friday nights back.

He was just being petty, but that was most likely the case. Friday is a perfect day. It’s the end of the work week for most, coming home to rest and spend time with your loved ones. Jungkook knows you haven’t had a Friday night to yourself for the last six months, except that one you shared with Kim Taehyung and you were pretty excited then.

[6:48 PM] Jeon Jungkook: hey y/n! yeah don’t stress, we’ll have sunhi for tonight :)

[6:48 PM] Jeon Jungkook: maybe even some more fridays from now on 

Sunhi wasn’t particularly fond of the idea either, but all Jungkook had to do was bring that ━dumb━  white lie up again. The “Auntie Y/N is giving you a cousin to play with” lie. 

That lie he hated spewing out, but it was the only one that seemed to calm her down. 

[6:49 PM] Y/N: what??? 

[6:49 PM] Y/N: i mean….i guess i’m glad that u guys are gonna have her but idk ??? i’ve gotten used to fridays with her 

Jungkook smiled slightly at your text, not expecting any different reaction from you. He knows you love his daughter so much that even the thought of not having her for a day bothers you.

[6:50 PM] Jeon Jungkook: aww it’s alright

[6:50 PM] Jeon Jungkook: invite over that guy you had last time, u deserve it 

The messages have already left and been read by the time he regrets doing it, which is straight after he sends them. He knows it’s the jealousy that’s speaking, he wishes he was genuinely saying that because you actually do deserve it. 

[6:51 PM] Y/N: oh 

[6:52 PM] Y/N: then please drop sunhi off tonight

Jungkook furrows his brows and begins typing to reiterate what he had previously said, but your quick reply makes him stop.

[6:51 PM] Y/N: and before u leave, stay for a few minutes

[6:51 PM] Y/N: we need to talk 

Jungkook sighs and runs his hand through his hair. Sunhi stares at her father and wonders why he’s taking so long picking one of those “good smelling liquids” he loves to wash her clothes with.

He turns to look at her with a small smile “Sunhi, wanna go to Auntie Y/N’s?” Jungkook doesn’t need a vocal answer, because a quick nod of her head with a big grin is enough to know what she wants. 

Jiwoo was probably going to be pissed that he decided to take a detour, but he thinks the text he sent her about stopping by to buy Sunhi an ice-cream will save him some time. 

He wonders what it is that you want to talk about. Now that he thinks about it, you’ve never told him that before, which inevitably makes him nervous. He does not like confrontation and arguing with someone that’s not his wife makes him anxious. Especially if it’s you.

You greet them with a smile on your face and Jungkook’s nerves calm down at the sight of you. Sunhi shares her sentiment and her arms immediately begin begging for you to take her, which you do and Jungkook feels like he could burst with joy. He wishes this is what he could come home to. 

You turned around, already heading inside with Sunhi in your arms while she begins excitedly talking about something. Jungkook lets himself in, seeing that you hadn’t closed the door to let him know he’s allowed to leave. He tries to forget the events of last week and how Kim Taehyung had been leaning on the same walls he’s now passing by. Sitting on the couch awkwardly, knowing this is where he had most likely been kissing you on before Jungkook interrupted. 

‘‘Sunhi, do you mind waiting in my room for a little? I want to talk to your daddy.’’ you ask the little girl, interrupting her rambling and she nods rapidly. Jungkook is amazed at how you always manage to convince his daughter, you’re not even persuasive enough ‘‘I’ll play Chip & Potato on my laptop for you, alright?’’ you offer and she smiles, bouncing her way into your room without even sparing a glance to her dad. 

You take some time setting everything up in your room to keep Sunhi safe and distracted while Jungkook is sighing every single minute that passes by, his leg bouncing up and down, unsure of what it is that you want to talk about. A lot of possible announcements go through his head and most of them are bad. 

Jungkook doesn’t even realize you’re back until you clear your throat, announcing your return and noticing his eyes are gone staring into the well; a frequent habit of his whenever he’s deep in thought. He looks up at you, whose arms are crossed as you give a look Jungkook can’t quite figure out. 

‘‘What’s up with you?’’ you ask, but Jungkook doesn’t know if it’s a rhetorical or genuine question, before he’s able to stutter an answer, you continue ‘‘I need to know, because I don’t understand what’s going on right now.’’ He can’t tell if you’re angry, but he can feel the frustration in your tone.

He wishes he could answer that question, because he barely knows what’s going on with him. ‘‘There’s nothing going on’’ he lies and you scoff, obviously not amused by his shallow answer ‘‘Why would you think that?’’ Jungkook wonders, but he’s pretending not to know.

‘‘Are you kidding me?’’ you are mad, but Jungkook’s impressed by how you’re able to remain calm and collected ‘‘First, you decide to act indifferent when I tell you about my date and then you show up at my apartment, unannounced, and when I ask what’s wrong you just up and leave─’’

‘‘Y/N, that’s not─’’ 

‘‘No, I’m not done. Please, let me finish.’’ Jungkook is not used to arguing this way, but he respects your request and lets you continue, muttering a sorry before you speak again ‘‘And now, you’re limiting my days with Sunhi because you want me to take the day off because ‘I deserve it’ and, coincidentally, mention Taehyung?’’ You’re laying it all out on the table and when you put it that way, Jungkook is able to see how shitty the whole situation looks like. 

‘‘So, I’m asking you again, what’s up with you?’’ 

Jungkook remains silent, his eyes are staring at the ground like a scolded child. Is this how Sunhi feels like? He wishes he had an excuse to give you, but he doesn’t. In fact, the only answer he’ll be capable of giving you is one he knows you’ll probably not like. 

You sigh deeply and sit down next to him, a space between you two and Jungkook still somehow feels comforted by your action. He knows you’re angry and yet you want to be close to him. Jungkook isn’t sure why you still try, even though he’s done about anything to push you away. 

‘‘I just─I’m trying my best to be a good friend to you, but then you go and do things like this and━’’ you stop and Jungkook finally looks at you and waits for you to continue ‘‘I don’t know, I just need some clarity, for once. I need you to be honest with me.’’ 

‘‘I don’t like Kim Taehyung.’’

Jungkook’s lying, sort of. 

There’s a partial truth to his statement, but it’s not really the reason as to why he’s been acting this way. 

This is what you want to hear, he thinks. 

There’s a surprised look on your face, expecting anything else besides that. You’re not even able to reply because he’s continuing, at this point there was no turning back so he might as well take the opportunity. 

‘‘Yeah, I don’t like that dude. In fact, I don’t want you to date him.’’ Jungkook says, shrugging his shoulders and you furrow your brows, shocked at your friend’s bold revelation. ‘‘It’s selfish, yeah, but it’s how I feel.’’ 

Jungkook is standing up from where he’s sitting, not being able to see you looking at him that way. This is usually how arguments with Jiwoo end up, with him leaving to get some air or alcohol, too tired to keep going back and forth. 

‘‘Yeah, this is not it.’’ you let out a breathless chuckle, following behind him ‘‘You’re just an asshole and Minji’s right, you’ve always been this way’’ Jungkook is used to the insult, but at the mention of your best friend ─who hates him─ he stops and turns around ‘‘Did she finally manage to make you turn your back on me?’’ 

You laugh and he’s taken aback ‘‘You’re unbelievable! You think you have the right to treat me how you please and then tell me you don’t want me to date whoever I want?’’ Jungkook knows you’re right, but right now he wishes you weren’t. 

‘‘You’re married, Jungkook. You chose to date and marry Jiwoo, who I’ve never liked, but I never told you that because you’re my friend and I will always support you even if I don’t like the decisions you take. So don’t say I’m turning my back on you, because I’ve never had and never will.’’ 

He just wants to blurt it out. He wants to tell you it’s not because he doesn’t like Kim Taehyung in particular. It could be anyone else and he still wouldn’t like them, but he’s angry and he doesn’t want you to see the person he becomes when he’s arguing with Jiwoo.

‘‘I’m sorry,’’ he mutters and you want to tell him no, that he’s not allowed to apologize, but you know there’s something more and as much as you’d like for him just to let you in deeper, all you’re able to do is shake your head in disappointment and sigh ‘‘I’ll pick up Sunhi later’’. 

Jungkook doesn’t let you say anything else, quickly leaving your place so he can run away from the confrontation, at least for a few hours before he has to face you again and pretend this never happened. 

Contrary to your belief, Jungkook is still wearing the same clothes he came with hours ago. It’s almost midnight now and you had spent the last few hours wondering where he could’ve been. You don’t think he must’ve gone back home, there’s a faint smell of alcohol lingering on him.

‘‘She’s asleep’’ you announce, stepping aside to let his tall figure come in, but he stands there looking at you with the eyes you’ve grown accustomed to. He’s apologizing, but he’s not saying anything. ‘‘Come in, please’’ you silently ask.

He’s surprised to see a glass of wine on your coffee table and he wonders if the argument had also made you decide to drink as well. He wasn’t tipsy, but he at least felt calm enough to forget he was ever angry in the first place. 

‘‘I don’t wanna go home’’ he silently confesses and you give him a confused look ‘‘Please, can-can we talk this through?’’ Jungkook’s asking, but it feels like he’s pleading. You’ve never seen him like this and you wonder if it’s the effects of the alcohol in his system. ‘‘I-I don’t wanna fuck this up, please.’’

His bottom lip is stuck out trembling and you quickly take his hands and guide him to the sofa you were both sitting on before the argument broke out. It’s the small sign of affection that makes Jungkook sigh peacefully. The way your thumbs rub his hands soothingly, not wanting him to break down. 

‘‘I don’t━’’ Jungkook hesitates at first, but you encourage him to continue ‘‘I don’t wanna go back to her.’’ You know right away he’s talking about Jiwoo.

You’re slightly surprised, only because he’s told you there’s been issues, but you believed they were working them out. But by the look on his face, you know they’ve probably reached a point beyond repair. 

It’s ironic how you’re always wishing for Jungkook to open up to you, but when he does you never seem to know what to say. All you’re able to offer him is a hug and the one you give him right now makes him feel small. It’s comforting and your smell is enough to make him close his eyes in peacefulness. 

He’d love to stay here forever. 

‘‘I don’t wanna fight with you ever again’’ he mumbles, voice muffled because his face is buried on your neck as your arms surround his broad back. You let out a breathless chuckle and nod, sharing his sentiment. 

‘‘Why didn’t you tell me?’’ he asks, raising his head slightly to look at you and you wonder what he’s talking about. Jungkook notices the furrow in your brows ‘‘Why didn’t you tell me you didn’t like her?’’. 

Oh, that. 

It was a heat of the moment revelation, one you had intended to never say out loud.

You shrug your shoulders, not really thinking it was that big of a deal now ‘‘Does it matter? You were head over heels for her, I don’t think my opinion would’ve changed that.’’ you chuckle, remembering how excited Jungkook had been when he told you he managed to bag a date with the pretty girl in one of his classes ‘‘You still are.’’ you add and he quickly shakes his head no, his hair tickling your neck and you try so hard not to giggle at the sensation. 

Jungkook’s hand comes to cup your cheek, making you look at him and the proximity makes you become aware of how close you two actually are right now. He looks determined, but you don’t really know what he’s thinking, at least you don’t expect the confession he’s about to make. 

‘‘’M not,’’ he begins, looking you straight in the eyes and the surprise makes you back away a little, but he’s quickly pulling you closer again ‘‘haven’t been in a long time, actually.’’ You know Jungkook’s being honest because this feels like what he's been wanting to tell you for some time, but had never mustered up the courage to say out loud.

And it is, because Jungkook’s been thinking about it a lot. Finally saying it feels different, like a huge weight has been lifted from his shoulders. He feels lighter now, he’s placed all those burdens somewhere far away right now. 

‘‘’M tired of pretending. I only do it for Sunhi’’ he sighs out, his soju infused breath grazes over your face and you're forced to look down, his eyes making you feel nervous, but he wasn’t going to let you hide just like that. He tilts your chin up to make you look at him again and you let out a shaky breath ‘‘I wanna stay here,’’ he mumbles ‘‘with you.’’

Your lips part slightly at his confession and you know there’s definitely something more than friendly in it. Jungkook’s hand drops from your face and he’s taking your hand in his, intertwining your fingers with his own.

 You’re unsure of what’s going on, a part of you is screaming to stop whatever Jungkook’s doing, not used to the unknown territory. 

But the other part is silently enjoying it, liking the way he looks at you like you’re special and the way your hand seems to fit perfectly into his. 

‘‘Would you like that?’’ his question is merely a whisper and you gulp. 

You’re trying to reason with yourself, because this is your best friend, the one you’ve known for eight years. The one who, maybe years ago, before Jiwoo came into the picture, you might’ve crushed on once. But that was so long ago that you had even forgotten about it. 

It’s Jungkook, it’s almost impossible not to catch feelings for him at one point or another. But he never saw you that way, at least he never let you know he did. Once he and Jiwoo became a thing, you knew he hadn’t. It didn’t matter, though. Because he was happy and you’d find someone that made you feel that way too.

But he’s here now, confessing that he no longer loves the woman he chose as his girlfriend and wife all those years ago. He’s not happy. Instead, all he wants is to stay here with you. To be happy with you. 

You don’t even realize you’re nodding, until you feel him squeeze your hand and give you a warm smile. 

‘‘Can━Can I kiss you?’’ he asks timidly and your eyebrows shoot up at his words, the corners of his mouth raise up at your reaction. There’s a lot of things running through your mind right now, all the reasons as to why you shouldn’t be in this position right now. 

But you still manage to muster up a shaky ‘‘please’’ and it’s with that word that Jungkook grabs your face with his hands and gently kisses you. There’s slight shock on you at first, not kissing back right away. But it’s the way Jungkook’s lips softly brush against yours, delicately, that make you reciprocate. 

If this feels like uncharted territory to you, it feels like a different universe for him. For the past seven years, he’s kissed the same lips. Slowly losing the feeling of enjoyment of kissing, always feeling like it’s an obligation. But this feels different, better even. He might go as far to say this is perfect. 

You forget about the real world for a moment while Jungkook’s kissing you. 

In the real world, Jungkook is a married man and a father. 

In the real world, you’re involved with another man, one whose company you enjoy. 

But the real world doesn’t matter right now, you’re too focused on the sheer electricity of Jungkook’s kisses to think clearly. 

Jungkook’s hands travel from your face to your neck, his fingers tracing the skin lovingly, he doesn’t know it’s also your sensitive spot and so, when you shudder, he smirks into the kiss and his lips leave yours, placing kisses along your jaw until he stops at the place you seem to love the most. A shaky breath comes out of you, fingers coming to lace themselves with his hair, enjoying the way he kisses tenderly into your neck, biting the skin, but not harsh, afraid that it might make you realize and regret what’s happening.

You tug at his hair gently and he emits a low groan at the action ‘‘Sunhi’s s-sleeping’’ you whisper, warning him about his daughter who wasn’t that far from where you both were. Jungkook is still focused on you, he’s trailing down to your collarbones and all he can think about is how he had seen you last week, another guy doing the same thing he’s doing now. 

‘‘Tell me to stop, then’’ he mumbles before he’s biting into the skin over your collarbones, wanting to leave a mark. Maybe next time you see Kim Taehyung he’ll see them and wonder how you got them because he hadn’t made those last time. You don’t ask him to, instead you let out a small moan at the way it stings when he nips at your skin. Jungkook chuckles, pleased that you’re enjoying this as much as he is. 

He’s back on your lips in a flash, but the kiss is different this time. It’s sensual, feeling a little more familiarized with the waters he’s currently navigating across. He traps your lower lip between his teeth and you’re trying so hard not to make any noise, aware that Sunhi could wake up at any given minute because of the noises in the living room.

Jungkook’s hands are lingering over your chest, your t-shirt ridden low, exposing your cleavage to him and he’s teasing you already, his index finger lightly tracing the curve of your breasts as he continues his lips’ ministrations. The sensation brings goosebumps to your body and your hands are clasped together around his neck, bringing him even closer as physically possible.. 

His hands make their way down your figure and land on your waist, gripping the skin and your hips involuntarily rise up, begging for more. He takes this opportunity to place his palms on your ass, squeezing the soft skin and sighing into your mouth, the feeling’s too good, so good that he feels like he’s hallucinating this whole thing. 

You feel dizzy, like the whole room’s spinning except for you and him. You don’t want his hands to ever leave your body and you wish you could just kiss him forever, not knowing how badly you had been wanting this. 

‘‘Auntie Y/N? Daddy?’’

As if you had been broken from a spell, you push Jungkook away from you and notice Sunhi lazily rubbing at her eyes, clutching the Dumbo plush toy in her arm. Jungkook manages to land safely on the edge of the couch and you quickly head over to Sunhi, kneeling to match her height and ask her what’s wrong, hoping she hadn’t seen anything from her position.

‘‘Nuffin,’’ she replies with a yawn ‘‘tired, cuddle me.’’ she asks, grabbing your hand and tugging at it to take you to your room. You gave a quick glance to her father, who was looking dumbfounded on your couch, breathing as he had just ran a marathon, there’s a pillow covering his lap and you figure out what he’s trying to hide.

You stop the little girl and she’s looking at you with sleep written all over her face ‘‘Baby, you’re daddy’s here, you have to go home now’’ you explain and she frowns, crossing her arms and stomping her foot on the ground ‘‘No! I wanna stay here with you’’. 

Like father, like daughter. 

You know the right thing to do is tell her once again that she has to leave, but you knew that meant you’d have to deal with a crying Sunhi, you usually wouldn’t bother, but right now your mind couldn’t handle it. You sighed and hummed, trying to think of a fast solution. 

‘‘Okay, wait for me in my bed, I’ll be there soon’’. 

Sunhi smiles and nods, quickly going back to your room. You suppose she hadn’t seen anything from a few minutes ago and you breathe out a sigh of relief. Once again you’re alone with Jungkook and he’s clearing his throat as if to grab your attention. You turn around and he’s looking at you with those big doe eyes of his, the ones where he’s looking for answers to life’s questions.

‘‘I─uh, I’ll put her back to sleep so you can take her home’’ you explain, but before Jungkook can say anything you quickly continue ‘‘I guess you should call Jiwoo to let her know you’ll be late.’’ 

You’re gone by the time Jungkook’s able to process your words. They serve him as a cold reminder of the reality of what had just happened. He had just kissed you and you kissed him back. Things had quickly escalated and he wondered whether you would’ve stopped them if Sunhi hadn’t woken up. 

Jiwoo doesn’t care if he’s late. That text he had sent her about stopping for ice-cream with Sunhi had been seen and left unanswered hours ago. Maybe that’s why he doesn’t feel guilty about what he did. If anything, he’d do it again, but he’s not sure if you’d say the same. 

Time passes and it’s almost 1 AM now and Jungkook hears no noise coming from your room, let alone you coming out with his asleep daughter so he’s able to go home. He quietly enters your room to find Sunhi and you asleep, the little girl snuggled up to your chest and you with your chin propped over her head, arm splayed over her small body. Jungkook’s surprised to see that the plush toy Sunhi can’t seem to be able to sleep without is left ignored on her other side, back turned to it. 

He can’t help but smile at the sight. It feels like he’s on dreamland, this is something he had always wished to see, but had never been able to. Once Sunhi grew old enough to sleep on her own bed, Jiwoo hadn’t allowed her to sleep on their bed again. 

It’s silly to keep comparing between you two, he knew you’d always do things right. 

Jungkook finds it complicated to take Sunhi home now, seeing how you two had trapped each other. It’s almost as if it was done intentionally. Jungkook chuckles and shakes his head slightly, getting closer to the two to properly place the blanket you were both sharing. He tucks a piece of hair that had fallen over your face and with the back of his finger, he graces Sunhi’s cheek lovingly. 

He turns the light off and heads back to the living room, making himself comfortable on your couch as he prepares to spend a few more hours at your place. His eyelids start getting heavy and he finds himself sleepy in no time.

Jungkook hopes he’s not dreaming already, imagining everything that just happened, because when he wakes up, it’ll be back to his normal life. 

At least right now, for a few hours, he’ll be able to feel the comfort of your home and reminisce on the events of merely an hour ago and hope they are enough to last him a lifetime. 

[the-cookie-of-doom]

@tinylionsed doing this in a post bc it’s WAY easier 

The absolute BAREST essentials to make a book: 

Needle & Thread (Embroidery floss works great, you should technically wax it, that makes it last longer/prevents degradation, but you don’t have to.) 

Awl for hole punching. (Could probably be improvised, but you may as well spend the like. $5 to buy a real one.)

Davey boards: This is for your cover. You can get a big ass set of them online for pretty cheap. You want at LEAST 9x6 inches. That’s about the size of a standard cover. I got mine bigger than that, but not big enough to cut one board in half for two covers, so I end up wasting a bunch of board. (I save the cuttings for spine pieces and jigs later. Keep your scraps.) 

Book Cloth: $5 for a sheet on Hollanders.com, comes in a ton of colors, and if you do half/quarter bindings (yours were quarter bindings), one sheet will last you a long time. Comes in a million colors. 

Cover paper: This gets pricey-er. On Hollanders, it costs the same as cover paper. You can also get it on etsy, (which is where I found yours), which is where it starts to cost $$$. “Lokta” is the magic word. It’s a specific kind of paper that holds up really well, and is beautiful. You can also just use card stock/decorative paper from your local craft stores. All up to you. (You can also save the craps from this for various projects. I’m going to make a scrap cover once I have enough pieces, and they make for fun accents in partial bindings.) 

Glue: I bought the smallest bottle of Mod Podge at walmart, which is like 4? oz? And I got several books out of it. You can also make your own paste with 1 part flour and about 4 parts water (hmu for details), which is Ye Olden Method, and works pretty good. I like to use the mod podge for the spine, and then then paste for gluing on the cover paper. It goes farther, and it pastes the paper down really well. (Unless you use cardstock, in which case you’ll need to line the edges with glue to really stick them down. Cardstock is stubborn.) 

Nice to have but not really necessary

Bone Folder: Most of my life I literally used the clipy part of a mechanical pencil. You could use a ruler or some type of card. You could use your nail. It doesn’t matter. You just need a straight edge of some kind to get crisp folds.

Mull: This is a... good idea... strongly recommended... but you could probably get away with not using it. I didn’t use it on Ten Lashes, but I did on Cursed, because that was a heftier book. It’s there to reinforce the spine, so smaller books don’t need it, but thicker books do. It’s the cheese-cloth looking paper, also pretty cheap. 

Book Tapes: Like mull, it depends on the size of the book. Again, Ten Lashes didn’t have it, Cursed did. It reinforces the spine, and thick books absolutely do need it. I would say once your book gets to about 1″ thick, that’s when you should use them. 

Headbands: These are the black strips at the top and bottom of Cursed. They also serve to reinforce the spine, when you actually make them yourself, which is a whole complicated process. You can also buy them as little tab to put on the ends of the book, which is what I did, and it makes the spine took nice and tidy/cleans up the edges. Preeetty much superfluous and there to look nice, you absolutely don’t have to buy them. 

I’m pretty sure that’s it for supplies! All in all, it’s sort of a large upfront investment, but the supplies carry over. The only thing you’ll be re-purchasing are the book cloths/papers, really, if you order to project like I do. 

I don’t want to be crass and literally outline the costs of your gift, but if you’re interested in average costs I could?? 

But like as an example, the cover paper cost me about $5 + shipping, and I was able to make your 2 books out of it, with enough left for 2 more. The book cloth will vary more because the amount you use depends on how thick your book is: Ten Lashes used about an inch less then Cursed, I think, but all in all I was using about 4″ wide strips, and I have plenty left over. So as long as you start off with supplies you know you’ll reuse (such as neutral black spines, with more decorative covers), you can stretch the costs. 

Also a note on the thread, bc it was my first mistake: Buy white/a light off-white cream. Trust me. You want it to blend with the paper in the beginning. and do NOT get pre-waxed, bc they always over-wax the hell out of it. You’d do better to get your own (linen) thread or floss, and wax it yourself. But get a light color. It looks the best, unless you want to do a contrast color. (Ex. I’m probably going to use a wine shade for my next book. I sadly didn’t have a good shade that would’ve matched the covers for yours T_T) 

[catrasredemption-moved]

Catra walked in on Glimmer jumping from the top of her bed, falling, teleporting back up and falling and teleporting again. 

“Is all this because the planning for the party is going just so well?”

Glimmer yelped when she noticed Catra, tumbled in mid air, and nearly hit the ground in her confusion. Catra jumped out to try and catch her at the last minute when she got her bearings and teleported onto her bed, accidentally taking Catra with her.

Catra looked up at Glimmer sitting on her stomach, then scrambled to her feet, hiding her embarrassment at her sudden movement.

“I just pacing. With a few extra steps. And the planning for the party couldn’t be going better.”

It felt weird to Catra realizing how long she’d known this girl, longer than she thought. The way she was talking now, the way she was holding herself, it was different from when they’d first met. She looked queenly. It reminded her of the pictures she’d seen of Glimmer’s mother, Angela. Well, the murals and oil paintings and intricate mozaics. And that made Catra feel…

She tensed up her muscles and looked to the side to see the ground, but stopped. She couldn’t get down without Glimmer’s help. And she wouldn’t anyway. She was going to stop running away so much. She would. She wouldn’t do those same things.

But she didn’t like the pain in Glimmer’s eyes and the exhaustion in her voice, and she had to do something about it or she’d start to feel…

“Hey, Sparkles, be honest. I’ll be honest right now if you’ll be honest too.”

Glimmer looked at her, intrigued. “Well that would certainly be interesting. Honest about what?”

Catra shrugged. “I don’t know. Just doing it is going to be hard enough, I’m not picking too.”

Glimmer nodded, and then everything changed. She went from being Queen of Brightmoon to a hyperactive burst of color and energy.

“I don’t know what I’m going to do about this party! It’s driving me crazy, and I just want to get it over with but also every second that passes it feels like I’m falling further behind, and this was supposed to be the fun part!” She had, just so many facial expressions while she was talking, way more than seemed necessary to Catra. Stop. More and more Catra was feeling like she was trapped in a room with the terrible thoughts she had about people, glaring at them and wishing she could lash out even though everyone told her that was exactly opposite of what she needed to do.

“If it’s not fun anymore then why even do it? Let Bow through the party, or let Swiftwind plan it. You won-” Catra pulled back, clenched her jaw at the bitterness that seeped into her voice and did her best to change her expression. “You won. Enjoy it. Do what you want now.”

Glimmer looked away, sad. “It’s not that simple. This party needs to succeed, and I’m the one who needs to make it happen and the more I plan and the closer it get’s it starts feeling so….hopeless.”

Catra laughed. “Queen of Brightmoon and drama. You’re acting like this is a battle, Glimmer. Succeed. Just relax. We’re not at war anymore.”

Glimmer sighed and lay back, putting her hands at her side. “Yeah, but it doesn’t seem that way sometimes.”

Catra lay back too. It was a bit unnerving to her - everything in Glimmer’s room was so fluffy that it made her feel like she was falling for a second - but she had to admit that made it a little fun.

“Yeah. Everything still feels like a fight to me, and it’s hard to stop seeing anyone but Adora as an enemy sometimes.” Honesty. “And even her too.” Catra’s words were flowing more easily than usually, and on some basic level she felt comfortable. Glimmer….there was something terrible between them, something Catra still feared would rear up at her any moment, but she had a feeling with the girl….like understanding. The kind of feeling she had with Adora and with….Hordak. It wasn’t the same thing as being close, and certainly not with Hordak, but it did make quiet moments easier for Catra. 

She grabbed the girl’s hand. Glimmer was shocked, but apparently it was a pleasant surprised. That’s right bitch, I can be casually affectionate now. Something in Glimmer seemed to ease, and Catra felt a small, precious rush of elation; she’d just made someone feel better. And scared. Glimmer very clearly felt a bit of unease with Catra’s claws wrapped around her hand, and Catra couldn’t help it but that made her feel good too. Old habit, probably a bad one. Her claws had always been an easy way to create distance or feel in control; everyone but Adora was at least a little bit scared of them. Well, her and Scorpia. And Entrapta. I can’t believe I let them go.

“Winning the war was what you wanted, wasn’t it?”

Glimmer laughed, her eyes twitching. “Well of course! I wanted to, stop the horde, save the world. We all did.”

“If that’s what you’d all wanted it wouldn’t have taken She-Ra - and you - to unite the princesses. They wanted to rule their kingdoms in peace, to live their lives. Did you ever dream about what your kingdom would be like once you’d done the actual saving?”

Glimmer’s eyes widened, and she gripped Catra’s hand, which was annoying because Catra had to readjust her claws to keep from scratching her.

“I - no, I never did. It was always just, be strong, stop the Horde, and you know, have fun. I mean, that’s what I was supposed to do. That’s how I could help my mo-”

There it was. Catra didn’t do anything, didn’t move. She knew on some level her attitude was bad but she didn’t care. She’d done what she’d done, now was the time to lie back and see what happened to her.

But Glimmer just kept talking.

“I mean, my mom, she was wonderful and all but...she was always stressed out from all the war and impending doom and my dead dad who’s alive now and that’s great - it took a toll on her. A big one. And I loved her and I’d do anything to have her back but there were times - before I met Adora and she started having a bit more hope - that weight that she carried affected things between her and me, a bit. And as soon as I could notice that she was hurting, I wanted to cheer her up. And I was you know, Glimmer, with the pink hair and the sparkles powered by magic and everything, cheering up adults was really easy for me. And I kept trying and as the years dragged on it worked less and less each time, and I started to realize the only way I could really make her stop hurting, for good, was to crush the Horde. And then we started fighting together because I was forcing my way into the conflict and we would get so angry at each other but I was doing it so that she could finally be - “ Glimmer choked up, and was sobbing. Catra felt like curling up and hiding away forever somewhere but knew how she felt wasn’t important at the moment, and so she squeezed the girl’s hand.

“I never got to see the way she’d smile when she knew it was all over. I never got to show what I’d done for her - I never got to prove - she never got to -” and then it was just tears, with a few syllables between but no recognizable words except “gone”.

Catra didn’t move. She didn’t do anything except try to make her own tears quiet. This grief wasn’t hers. It felt disgusting for her to act like this after what she did, but she’d feel even worse if she had felt nothing at all.

After a while Glimmer let out a deep breath. “I feel better. Nothing is better, but….thanks, Catra.”

Catra tensed up. She could feel her careful neutrality slipping away. She had no right to be here, no right to hold her hand or hear those words -

“Ow!” Catra had slipped up, and let her claws slice into Glimmer’s hand just a bit, just enough to draw blood. Glimmer moved to pull her hand away but Catra grabbed her arm with her other hand and with the first hand held on tight.

“You might have gotten cut up more if you just pull away from my claws like that. Let me disengage, and then we can see about getting you medical attention.”

Catra uncurled her hands until her palms were flat and Glimmer pulled away, examining the blood droplets with pinpoint eyes.

“Medical attention? Who’s the drama queen now? It’s a tiny little scratch.”

Catra opened her mouth to say something, then didn’t. Didn’t say or do anything.

Glimmer rolled her eyes. “Catra, why did you freak out like that? We had just started to….get somewhere. I was starting to feel like we were….you know.”

“Well maybe you shouldn’t feel that way!” Catra breathed in sharply, tried to will her heart to beat slower, kept an even voice. “Don’t listen to that. It doesn’t mean anything. It doesn’t matter. Don’t worry about it.”

Glimmer put her hand on Catra’s shoulder. It was the hand with the blood on it, and the blood got onto Catra’s fur, and Glimmer did realize that was a bit of a mistake but things were to intense to stop and notice that. “Catra, honestly. I was just really, really honest, you owe me now.”

Catra didn’t say anything.

Then she realized, in a bolt of terror, that nothing was stopping her anymore.

“I’m the reason your mom’s not here anymore.”

T_T T_T T_T

[reservethesun]

im sorry i couldn't not jump on the opportunity can we pretty please get forth beam with like hurt/comfort. idk forth doing normal engineering things aka gets into a fight for honor and doc beam to the rescue

Ahh thank you for your prompt! I love ForthBeam so much. T_T I feel very rusty with writing rn and I don’t know how good this is going to be, but here you go. Not a whole lot of actual like... traditional hurt/comfort but more Forth finding comfort in being around Beam and things being normal between them.

Word Count: 1658

Forth groaned as he tried to sit up fully, using the wall behind him to prop himself up. He wasn’t sure how he got to that point. He’d only stepped in to try to help and he’d thought that he had the upper hand. Until suddenly he didn’t - but at least the kid he’d stepped in for had run off. Forth would count that as a win, even if he was pretty sure that he looked a mess and that he wasn’t going to be moving normally for a while. Forth let out a small, almost bitter laugh - Beam was going to murder him.

Speaking of Beam, it seemed just thinking about him did wonders because his phone started to play Beam’s ringtone. Forth thought about letting it go to voicemail while getting himself to the hospital to get looked over, but then he was sure that would only make it worse when Beam found out he’d gotten hurt and hadn’t said anything. “I was just thinking about you,” Forth greeted as he answered the call, doing his best to not let the pain he felt obvious in his voice.

“Where are you at? You were supposed to be here ages ago,” replied Beam. He sounded a little distracted - he was probably studying while waiting for Forth to show up so they could grab dinner like they had planned. 

The sound of a page being turned on Beam’s side of the call reinforced Forth’s assumption. “Ah. Just hanging around,” Forth said, trying not to wince. He exhaled slowly, shifting the phone so that he didn't breathe directly into the speaker. He shifted wrong in his attempt to get up and was unable to mask the involuntary sound that escaped him, making it very clear that he wasn't as okay as he seemed. 

“What did you do this time?” Beam sighed heavily and Forth could easily picture him pinching the bridge of his nose.

“Look. There was this kid and I-”

“Where are you?”

Forth hesitated. He was sure that Beam was intending to come find him, if only to scold him for being impulsive and reckless again. “On campus. I’ll be there soon.”

“Where on campus?”

Forth could hear the sounds of Beam closing his textbook and things being shuffled around - probably him searching for his wallet and keys. “I’m fine. I’ll be there soon. You stay there and keep your pretty nose in that book.”

“Uh-huh. If you’re so fine then why are you still there and not already on your way here?”

Forth faltered at that question. He had no good answer because Beam was right. If Forth really was as fine as he was saying, he would’ve already stood up and started to make his way to Beam’s dorm. Yet he still sat there, vaguely sure that the only reason he was able to sit up like he was was because the wall was behind him if the way his side was hurting was any indication. He guessed the guy had kicked him after he’d fallen. Forth couldn’t really remember. It had all been a big blur, as fights tended to be. At least in his experience. He didn’t think he hit his head besides the fist that hit his face a couple of times. But it was fine. Forth got in several hits of his own - his knuckles were bruising to prove it. “I’m fine. I’ll be there soon. But, uh… could you make sure you have some ice?”

“Forth.” Beam said his name more as an exasperated sigh than a real word. It made Forth wince which hurt more than he would have liked. His face was probably turning pretty colors.

With a groan, Forth used the wall behind him to brace himself and stand up. Doing so left him a little out of breath but he was able to stand on his own and the world didn’t spin around him like it did the last time he’d been in a similar situation. “I’m up. I’m moving. It’s good. I’m fine.”

“What do you mean you’re up?” Beam snapped.

Forth gave a short, airy chuckle in response. “I just mean that I’m okay - just a bit banged up. I’ve had worse.”

“That doesn’t make it okay. You said-”

“Was I supposed to let that guy keep wailing on that kid?” Forth could hear the slight click of Beam’s teeth from how quickly and hard he closed his mouth at the question. They both knew that Forth wouldn’t do that. “That’s what I thought. Now. I’ll be there soon. If you promise to be nice and tend my wounds for me.” Beam didn’t answer, just sighed heavily through his nose but Forth took that to be a confirmation and he promised to see Beam soon before he ended the phone call.

If he was limping a little when he walked, well he was just glad there was no one around to prove it.

It didn’t take him too long to make his way to Beam’s dorm. Honestly, trying to navigate himself up the stairs took longer because his side hurt to a point that it was difficult to breathe after several steps up. None of his ribs felt out of place, though, so he was sure that it was just strain and bruising. He was also aware that he was probably just being a baby and that none of it was anywhere near as bad as he felt it was right then - his pride was probably more injured than he actually was, but damn that guy could throw a punch.

Forth knocked on the door to Beam’s apartment once he reached it and it opened almost immediately after. Beam must have been waiting by the door for him to show up. Beam reached out and grabbed his chin, directing Forth to turn his head this way and that to inspect the bruises forming on his face. “I know I’m pretty but are you going to keep me out here all night?” asked Forth. He smiled when Beam huffed out a breath but let go of his face and moved aside. “Promise it’s not that bad. Just some bruising to my face, hand, and side. You’ve seen me worse.”

“That doesn’t make it okay,” Beam replied. He gestured for Forth to go sit down on the couch before disappearing into his bathroom so that he could grab his first aid kit. He returned to the other room and sat down on the couch. Neither one of them said anything as Beam used a cotton swab to put some antibacterial ointment on a small cut Forth had on his face. Forth wasn’t sure if it was from being hit or from when he fell. There were no other cuts or anything, which they both took to be a good thing. Just some swelling and bruising.

Beam activated the instant ice pack in the kit and wrapped it loosely in a thin towel before placing it on top of Forth’s knuckles on the hand he had used to punch the guy he fought with. “Hold it there,” Beam instructed.

“Thank you, Doctor Beam,” said Forth with a smile.

Beam struggled not to smile in return, fighting against the upward twitch in the corners of his mouth as he cleared his throat. “Anything else?”

“I love you?” Forth’s smile took on a more cheeky nature when Beam just sighed and rolled his eyes before gathering up the kit to return it to the bathroom. Forth didn’t mention his side hurting because he was sure it was nothing. It was all nothing in the grand scheme of things. 

After he put up the kit, Beam returned to the couch. Forth immediately shifted closer to him and leaned against his side. Beam seemed to struggle with himself for a few seconds before he lifted his arm and wrapped it around Forth’s shoulders, letting Forth shift even closer to his side. “You know, for someone who hurt me far worse than this guy did yo-” Forth started to tease Beam, chuckling when his boyfriend interrupted him.

“That was an accident!” he insisted. It truly had been an accident, they both knew it. Beam would never purposely hurt Forth. 

“Well. Just keep it in mind that you did more than just a black eye next time you get mad at me for defending someone.”

“I’m not mad that you defended someone.” That wasn’t why he was always obviously annoyed that Forth had gotten into another fight. There was always a good reason for the fight, he knew that. Forth didn’t go around picking fights just to pick fights. Still, he didn’t like seeing Forth hurt.

“Mn. But you are mad.”

Beam sighed inaudibly and hugged Forth a little closer, to the point that Forth was practically on his lap at that point and he rested his head on Beam’s shoulder as he got comfortable where they were. Beam wasn’t mad. He knew it seemed like he was, but he wasn’t. He was just… worried. And he didn’t like seeing Forth hurt. Beam found it easier to show anger than concern. Even if there was always that tinge of concern on the edge of everything he did and said. Forth knew him well enough to know that by that point in time, but it didn’t stop Forth from poking at the obviously angry actions and tone of voice. “Let’s watch something instead of sitting here with you being all frowny and glaring at the wall,” Forth suggested.

“I am not-” Beam sighed when Forth reached up to place a hand to his lips to shush him, letting the ice pack fall to the floor.

“Shh. I’m hurt. Let me choose what we watch.”

“Ai’Forth!”

Forth smiled with a laugh as Beam removed his arm from around his shoulders, but Beam didn’t move away and let Forth set his head on his shoulder again. 

[jumnthepurestbean]

I was wondering if you could do the rfa+ saeran, V and Vanderwood meeting MC’s Twin sister who’s like her best friend. I dunno if that makes sense 😅

RFA+V, Saeran & Vanderwood x MC with a Twin Sister

Jumin

Has always found twins a little bit fascinating.

It reminds him of his relationship with Jihyun…or at least what it used to be T_T

Like I’ve said in many of my other headcanons for Jumin, MC’s family is Jumin’s family.

MC’s sister and him basically become siblings tbh.

They become really close and they all three hang out together.

Jumin is always annoyed when he and MC’s sister will be out together and the media will think it’s MC.

Jumin can 100% tell which one is which.

How can anyone not? It is completely obvious.

When MC asks how can he tell he will go into great detail.

“Well your nose is a turned up 10 degrees more than her. You also have 26 freckles on your face while she only has 20. Her hair is also–”

Yoosung

“THERE ARE TWO OF YOU?!?!?!?”

Wasn’t expecting MC to look so much like her sister.

Asks them if they ever switched places. Like did you two go to each other’s classes when you didn’t want to?

Both laugh and say they never did that.

But one time when MC was having a bad hair day on picture day, her twin went twice.

There parents were sooooo mad about that XD

Yoosung struggles to tell them apart when he can’t compare them. Like if one of them came up he couldn’t tell you which was which. However when he sees them side by side he can see the small details.

Plus the way MC’s eyes light up when she sees him helps

Zen

Thinks its neat.

I don’t imagine that Zen would have much of a reaction.

He would probably tell jokes like: “Your sister isn’t as annoying as Seven, is she? ;)” “You aren’t the evil twin, right, MC?”

But then he sees MC’s relationship with her twin.

It kind of reminds him of how close he was with his brother

While he is happy that MC has such a wonderful relationship with her sister, it makes him sad.

MC encourages him to try and reach out to his brother to see if maybe they could make a better relationship.

Jaehee

More *clap* galpals *clap* for *clap* Jaehee!

I guess I am on the “Jaehee needs more friends” train today.

I like the idea that MC and her sister are close but MC’s sister basically becomes Jaehee’s sister.

Like they become so close.

Jaehee needs more good familial and platonic relationships dangit!

I just want MC’s sister to make Jaehee a friendship bracelet.

That is all I want.

Saeyoung

*evil glint*

WE WILL RULE THE WORLD MC!

Seven please calm down

Thinks it’s neat

And is happy that MC could grow up with such a good relationship with her sister.

Once everything calms down all four of them go out together. MC’s sister and Saeran probably won’t get together but they’re kind of like a small family.

V

Can’t tell them apart.

Listen the man has vision issues cut him some slack!

“MC, can you and your sister please wear different colors?”

Also is sad (when is V not sad???) because this could have been Saeyoung and Saeran.

But also happy because they have such a good relationship.

I kind of like the idea of MC’s sister teaching V to…lighten up (I guess is the right word?)

Also makes him want to have that great relationship he had with Jumin again.

Oh no I’m crying, JIHYUN GO HUG JUMIN

Saeran

“You’re a twin…and I’m a twin…we’re meant to be~”

Saeran you absolute bean

Knew about it when he was research MC and that was what kind of drew him to her.

Deep inside he wanted that good relationship with his brother

Is nervous to meet her because…he’s nervous to meet any new people

But it is easier because she looks like MC!

They get along really well!

Vanderwood

Pretends he can’t tell them apart to tease MC

He totally can tho.

MC’s sister will make fun of his cape/jacket thing

“You’re the ugly twin”

“At least I don’t have a mullet”

“MC YOUR SISTER IS BEING MEAN TO ME!!”

But it is a playful banter.

Vanderwood would risk is life for MC’s sister tbh.

[echodrops]

Hshshsnansna seeing that ask got me in a HUGE HaaH mood. Like, I went through and read a bunch of asks, and I'd probably go reread the fic itself if I had time. So!! Is there anything about HaaH you've always wanted to share but never had the chance to? Headcanons, worldbuilding, backstory, hidden details- anything at all??

Oh friend… There is so much. I have a Word document that’s like 17k of JUST headcanons and world-building for this fic kghsdkjhdkfg I’m not crazy, I swear.

It took me a while to respond because I had to comb through and find stuff that wasn’t spoilery, but tada, have some Home and a Half Hunk and Shiro (and Matt) headcanons and backstory under the cut!

Also, as for hidden details… Same as the Garrison professors in the show were named for staff members, Neuhahn and Ania are named after IRL contributors to the Voltron animated series–Chris Neuhahn was a producer and Ania O’Hare was the casting director.

And here are some Hunk, Shiro, and sorta Matt headcanons/backstory that shapes their characters in HaaH. (Please note, these headcanons ignore absolutely everything from about season 6 of the actual show and on. I stopped watching Voltron after Season 6 because I just couldn’t handle the writing anymore. T_T)

Hunk:- He’s mixed ethnically, and although his parents are from Samoa, his family tree actually spans many different countries, mostly in Polynesia, including Tonga, but even places as far away as Malaysia.- His parents were converted to the LDS church by Mormon missionaries in Samoa. A few years before Hunk was born, his parents moved to Utah to be closer to the church, so Hunk has only ever been to Samoa once, on a vacation to visit family.- His first name is actually “Hyrum,” and until he met Lance at a Garrison-sponsored summer astro-camp when they were nine, everyone just called him by his real name.- Lance actually meant to call him “Incredible Hulk” at camp, butttt to nine-year-old Lance’s utter mortification, it came out “Incredible Hunk” instead. “Hunk” stuck.- He has a little sister who is even more sensitive than he is.

- Although Hunk’s parents originally agreed on the plan to move to America, after the family arrived, they experienced difficulty fitting in with the very selective Utah culture, and Hunk’s mother grew disenchanted with the church. Employment was difficult to find in their small, rural town, and Hunk’s parents both struggled with being isolated from their extended families. Tensions over whether or not to remain in America, as well as over money, led to some miserable fights that contributed to Hunk’s aversion to conflict when he was younger.

- Hunk sometimes had to play the role of family peacekeeper, working hard to make sure that his youngest sister wouldn’t notice the strain.

- Nevertheless, despite their share of troubles, the family is extremely close-knit. Hunk values his family and their opinions more than anything in any world.

- Which is how he ended up agreeing to go to Garrison, even when he really just wanted to help his parents kickstart the restaurant they were planning to open. His mother felt that working in a family restaurant, even if Hunk is a great cook, would squander his incredible academic and engineering talent (which Hunk thought of as just a hobby), so she begged him to go and continue his schooling instead. Hunk couldn’t say no to his mother, even if the thought of being shipped off into space terrified the living daylights out of him.

- Hunk doesn’t curse and is somewhat uncomfortable with people cursing, at least in front of him. Although Lance used to have a pretty colorful repertoire, when he learned that cursing made Hunk uncomfortable, he immediately adopted all of Hunk’s weird Utah replacements instead. “Holy crow” and “let’s kick some trash” are things they actually say seriously.

- Hunk is always down to cuddle and is never embarrassed by asking for or giving cuddles to anyone. He would 200% cuddle Shiro if he thought Shiro would let him. (Shiro would, in fact, let him.) Hunk’s favorite person on the team to cuddle is actually Keith, because Keith (who was taught to comply by Garrison scientists with all unexpected/unsolicited touch) will just sit obediently for hours letting Hunk hug out all his stress. Hunk knows that something is off about Keith’s behavior, but his leading theory—that Keith allows the hugs because he’s touch-starved—is unfortunately false.

- Hunk knows the lyrics to every Disney song EVER.

- And he’s like a dog with a bone when it comes to secrets. Once he discovers that someone’s keeping something under wraps, he goes a bit crazy with curiosity and cannot stop thinking about what they might be hiding. The rules of privacy go totally out the window when he gets like this, but time and again, Hunk’s adage that it’s always better to tell the truth bears itself out.

  Shiro (and Matt?):

- Shiro is the only member of his immediate family whose first language was not Japanese. His grandparents on both sides immigrated to the US from Japan due to work transfers relatively late in life, when their own children, Shiro’s parents, were already young adults. As the first family child to be born in America, Shiro’s parents strongly emphasized the need to learn English well, which unfortunately resulted in Shiro being pushed away from learning Japanese when he was young. Even though he’s a capable conversationalist now, he’s struggled his whole life with regret over not learning the language when he was young and could have picked it up easier.  

- There’s a running joke in his family that he’s actually an ogre in disguise, given that he is much taller than many of his other family members. Tradition demands that the first photo of every holiday gathering is a joke group shot in which Shiro’s posed so his entire head is outside the top frame of the picture.

- Shiro was mercilessly bullied as a child because of his height. The other children frequently suggested that he didn’t belong in their grade because he was too big and that the school must held him back multiple times for being dumb. (Shiro was never held back. In fact, he had excellent grades from kindergarten to the day he graduated from Garrison—and no, not because his parents forced him to study; in fact, throughout his schooling, they often ended up having to force Shiro to go to bed already instead.)

- On top of being teased for his looks, Shiro was naturally shy. He barely spoke, even to his teachers, and would stumble miserably if he was put on the spot in class, contributing further to the rumor that he was stupid.

- Shiro loved learning, but he hated everything that happened in school and didn’t have a single real friend outside of his cousins until he went off to middle school and met Matt Holt in sixth grade.

- Barely two weeks into their first middle school year, and it was already obvious that Matt was the school’s biggest nerd; he’d been bumped up two grades because of his obvious genius and was the textbook definition of an alien conspiracy theorist (It’s not a conspiracy if they’re REAL, guys!) But the strange thing was that no one bullied Matt—he was just so quick on the sarcastic (and biochemical) comebacks that teasing him wasn’t even worth it. Instead, the school’s resident assholes took it out on targets a little less likely to corrode their homework with miniature magnesium bombs—read as, they picked on polite, well-meaning Takashi Shirogane instead.

- Out of pity more than anything else, Matt finally stood up for Shiro one day and ran off the assholes. (It was not, as Mrs. Shirogane insists, with a home-made taser. It was not.) After something like that, well… You sort of feel obligated to befriend a guy, don’tcha?

- Becoming friends with Matt Holt transformed Shiro’s life. Even if Shiro wouldn’t originally speak up for himself, he was ferociously proud and supportive of his first real friend, and learning to be bold for Matt taught Shiro the value and meaning of standing up for not only others, but also himself. Being friends with someone as off-the-cuff and tricky as Matt helped Shiro grow more spontaneous, less self-conscious, and ultimately much more confident—even if, to this day, most of that confidence is still focused on helping others, rather than on being self-assured.

- It was Shiro admiration for Matt’s father, Sam Holt, that led Shiro to take his childhood obsession with military history a step further by actually joining the military. Shiro and Matt enrolled in Garrison together, although Matt was part of the research rather than the combat division.

- Matt was the one who convinced Shiro to get his hair styled in an undercut. It was originally just a dare, but Shiro ended up loving it afterward. The “Undercut Incident,” as it has come to be known in the Shirogane family, was the official straw that broke the camel’s back and resulted in Mrs. Shirogane declaring Matt Holt a “bad influence,” the only impact of which was that Matt had to sneak in through Shiro’s bedroom window instead of coming to the front door when he wanted to hang out.  

- Shiro has received two separate Medals of Honor for making dangerous supply deliveries to war-torn countries across the globe, delivering the vital food and medicine that helped save hundreds of lives. He has also been part of several missions to save stranded astronauts from failing international space stations.

- Shiro is actually a giant memelord, but his crushing sense of responsibility keeps him from indulging in quality shitposting in front of anyone he actually knows. He had a ridiculously active secret Vine account before leaving on the Kerberos mission. His snaps are legendary. Deep down, Shiro dreads the inevitable day someone connects him with his cringey social media accounts.

- Literally the worst at adulting. His mom still filled out his tax forms for him and booked his dentist appointments. He has no idea what the hell he’s doing leading Team Voltron when he can’t even remember which of his clothes are machine-washable and which aren’t.

- When they were in their third year at Garrison, Matt conned Shiro into volunteering as a camp counselor for Garrison’s summer astrocamp program, even though Shiro had minimal understanding of how to take care of children and mostly just BS’d his way through, hoping that none of his campers had anything close to a serious issue.

- He won “best camp counselor” the very first year he volunteered. Mostly because Lance cheated and voted for him 23 times, but still.

[mnemehoshiko]

I Really Should Just Invest In Naps + TMI: HEALTH STUFF (x-posted DW/PF)

I'm so tired. I really need to think of a better way of starting these beyond, "hi hello. i am tired. ONCE A FUCKING GAIN."

My parents came Thursday evening to help my brother move on Friday. He's moving apartments and i'm lowkey jealous because he has

TWO ROOMS!!!

A REAL BATHROOM!!

a fucking washer and dryer in unit

all utilities covered except for internet

for fucking 950/month. T___T

The only con is that he's farther from things compared to his, now, prior apartment. Also it's carpeted which is a downside for me (and probably him). But ughhhhh.

But he did most of the movie on his own before they showed up on Friday? So they didn't have a lot left to move.

Mama brought me pillows?? Which are Nice and Lovely and I like the Color but it was also just weird to go downstairs to let them in and have the exchange of

Me: SALAAM MOM

Mother: Salaam, I have your pillows. *thrusts garbage bag filled with pillows at moi*

Me:*blinks* (thinking....when....did I....ask....for pillows??? In retrospect, it was probably one of those things I like claimed when grandma posted stuff to the family WhatsApp group?? And I probably?? Forgot???) Mother: *squints* you just woke up didn't you. Me, who got dressed in like 3 minutes immediately after she called saying they were here: *takes pillows* =__= (I had Not Just Woken Up. I had woken up and then rolled over. VAST DIFFERENCE!! ....there is no difference.) (In my defense, my period has literally Just Started and I'm like Not Happy By This. T_T) They ask if I want to come to my brother's place to move stuff and I'm like, "i'll go on the second round." (also known as attempt to clean my apartment, haahhahaha) I help with the second round of stuff and we all pile into the mini-van to go my brother's place and it's NICE and I am Not Envious but I'm Not Not Envious. =___=

He has Actual Windows. T__T (my bedroom does not. my apartment...has A Lot of Flaws but It's Walking Distance From Many Things So I'm Paying for Convenience) (is this my current mantra? MAYBE.) Anyway, afterwards we go to Costco because like That Is What I Care About. And we Costco'd up. And had minor rage that a pack of 3, clinical strength "lady" deodorants were 12.99 vs 10.99 for 5 pack of "men" clinical deodorant. My brother concurred and has like also read up on the "pink tax" before and like if he ends up marrying a lady, I'M JUST LIKE??? CONGRATS?? WE HAVE TRAINED SOME SEMBLANCE OF A WOKE BLACK MALE. PLEASE DIRECT PRAISE TO MY MOTHER AND MY SISTERS. (no really, he can cook, clean, grocery shop, basically function as a decent human being and like LISTENS WHEN WOMEN TALK IN A THOUGHTFUL MANNER. He also is willing to openly weep during movies, so like congrats.) Anyway, then we went to Sprouts?? Which is like the Large Hippie Grocery Store in Durham and I uhhhh had never been there properly and now I understand why little brother sometimes grocery shops there. There were So Many Types of Almond Milk I Was In Heaven. (update: have discovered that Sprouts....instacarts to my area......as does Sur la Table. This Is Dangerous Information.) Then we went to the hardware store to acquire somethings for little bro's apartment and then we popped back to my place and my mother was like LET ME HELP YOU WITH THINGS. Me, aware my apartment is still disastrous: "That's....not....necessary." Narrator: The mother was undeterred. She did not have a conniption but she did go into Deep Maternal Worry Mode with Bonus Overbearing and Meddling Steamrolling. Internal Me: She means well. She means well. She feels guilty that she's not Around More Often Even Though I Made The Choice To Move Down South. Mother: are you okay? I know you have the anxiety and depression but has anything else happened?? You know?? You'd feel better if this place was cleaner. Me: *pained nods* Mother: Has anything else happened that you haven't told us??? I know you have the health things but anything else? Me: ...no??? (Beyond health and like my inability to like sleep properly, nothing else has happened but stress of my grad life. =_=_ Mother: LETS TAKE JUST 5 MINUTES AND TIDY THINGS UP A LITTLE

Me, who's hungry and still Has Not Eaten In Spite of It Being 5pm: mother Mother, with broom and dustpan and trashbag: COME ALONG. Internal Me: She means Well. At Least She Is Here And Alive. Appreciate The Time You Have With Her. She Means Well. *grits teeth* We clean. WE ALMOST THROW AWAY ONE OF MY ROTHYS BECAUSE SHE DOESN'T LOOK INSIDE  BOXES BEFORE THROW SHIT OUT!!! And then we go to the restaurant for dinner....where the kitchen messes up my little brother's order and has chapati on the plate and he has a severe wheat allergy. So he takes Benadryl and my mother....goes into....deep worry mode Again. SHOULD WE LEAVE HIM AT HIS APARTMENT BY HIMSELF???? SHOULD WE TAKE HIM TO THEIR HOTEL??

my mother, once again, making plans without idk ASKING EITHER PARTY INVOLVED: MNEME, YOU SHOULD STAY AT HIS PLACE OVERNIGHT!! HE HAS A WASHER AND DRYER SO YOU CAN DO YOUR LAUNDRY THERE FOR FREE!!! me, a known cheap but is fucking exhausted and trying desperately to Not Snap At My Mother Because That Is Not Respectful But Also Looking Forward to Flopping on Her Fucking Couch and Maybe Even Getting A Waterbottle for my tummy: ....yes mother. =___= My dad upon seeing my mother and I exiting the apartment complex with my laundry: ???? Me, wordlessly pleading for salvation: o__o My mother, once we get to my brother's apartment: ....you know I probably should have asked before making this plan... My brother and I having Just Accepted Our Fate: *crickets* I give my brother the air mattress to blow up until he gets a Real Bed, (the place came unfurnished--which is the other reason I haven't moved because i'd need to like Get Furniture And At This Stage of My PhD, It's Just Not Worth It--so he has No Furniture At All). I sleep on the floor instead of telling my brother to just scoot over and let me ALSO SLEEP on the mattress which is a Queen-sized mattress. Nor does it occur to him to offer it to me. *stares into the void at my back* (In her defense, she did message us apologizing and I know she wasn't doing it maliciously and she's over zealous at times because she feels bad that like I'm a few hundred miles away. Alone. By myself. Single and thus don't have like anyone who's there for emotional support which like does suck but also I AM DOING... Not Amazing But Not As Bad As Undergrad? So...yeah.) I do all my laundry except for like One set that I do in the morning because my father is slow as molasses for Anything and I Know That While My Mother Wants To Leave Early they will not be here early and I have accepted this reality. Mother: WE'RE GOING TO BE THERE By 7:30 AT THE LATEST Narrator: They arrived around 10ish. We still managed to get to the farmers markets though? WHICH IS WHAT I WANTED HER TO EXPERIENCE. NC may not have Many Good Things but The Farmer Markets are So So Nice?? And big??? I have also realized if you wear a shirt that says "Ask me, I'm a scientist!" Shockingly, people read it and like ASK. Me, who slept in this shirt and threw a cardigan on because I was Too Lazy To Put On A Real Adult Shirt: ????? ! oooohhhhh... i do science. yes. yes, i do. Also got my brother to change his address because the voter registration folks were there and like IT'S EASIER TO DO IT THERE then like Figure Out Where To Go, so like We Did Our Civic Duty Today. *finger guns* Got some loaves of GF bread from the bread seller that sells Actual Edible GF bread. Sadly, they were out of raisin because it was 11am and like they open at 7am. T___T

Then we grabbed my dad, who went to the coffee shop....to work. It's been almost a full year since his open-heart surgery and he's back to being a Workaholic. =___=

Then we went to Lowes because he needed something and my parents FAILED TO COMMUNICATE PLANS and he was like...."oh I thought we were going to do it on the way back to MD??". Either way, I now have an adapter to make a three pronged plug into a two pronged one? So yay?

Then we took me, and my laundry, back to my place. My mother gave yet more instructions. I just smiled and nodded and reminded that she meant well.

And then ran back to the car because SHE WAS SO INSISTENT ON LIKE MOVING MY LAUNDRY BASKETS THAT SHE ALMOST LEFT HER MEDS BEHIND!! Me, ....this...is why....i said.... i could do it.......

But they are now back safely in MD, along with my brother because he has an orhto appointment. I was debating going back with them but I uh can't because I have a meeting with my PI on wednesday. And thus, I stay here. But I have a lot of article revisions and analyses to do so it sadly makes sense.

Maybe I'll try to go NY in Aug or mid-July?

IN FUN HEALTH THINGS, new game that I hate; "is this blood from my period or from my ass?" Spoiler: It's both~~~." Which now makes me regretting uh telling the gastro office that "no, I don't have symptoms so I don't think the steroid is necessary??" But in my defense, I DIDN'T HAVE SYMPTOMS ON WEDNESDAY WHEN THEY CALLED. Also they uh, usually are 3-6 months apart not 1.5 months...apart. So that was an unpleasant surprise which led to me pass out in bed when my parents left because ahhahahaha blood loss is v v exhausting and I forgot to pack my iron pills last night.

-____-

So, my mother is coming down again in July to take me to my sigmoidscopy. In which, they'll see things. Or they won't. I hope they see something? Anything? I don't want UC but I WOULD LIKE TO KNOW

- why i've been constantly inflamed since 2015?

- i know what hemorrhoidal bleeding looks like and uhhhhh i'm sorry but I shouldn't be dropping Actual Clots Out Of My Ass

*lies down*

i just want to not be tired and my intestines to not hate me as much. =_=

Okay, I am Going To Actually Sleep After I Knock Back Some Licorice Tea for my throat. (it's....super sore for some reason which is Not Great since I have D&D tomorrow most likely.)

[kirachama]

more than fake (saeran x reader)

summary: in order to get out of a mixer with your friends on valentine’s you tell them that you actually have a date when you don’t. their enthusiasm prompts you to set up a fake date with saeran. well, at least it’s supposed to be fake... right?

rating: 10+ (warning: it’s long. like. 10k long. why did this happen?)

notes: so this is my (extremely late) valentine’s gift for @twofacedhero for @mysmesecretvalentines‘s event. @twofacedhero‘s been following me for a while so I wanted to do something really nice and it kind of... spiraled out of control which is why it’s so late. i’m not used to writing things this long... ahahaha... anyway, i really do hope you enjoy, dear! thank you so much for your patience following me for so long! T_T i hope you had a good start of the semester!

> link to ao3 <

“You know what’s coming up?”

You gulp, but refrain from answering. Seeing as it’s Heeji, your resident boy crazy romantic, who’s talking she can only mean one thing: Valentine’s Day. You knew it was coming soon. How could you not? It seems like every shop you’ve gone to has some sort of display up, adorn with a variety of flowers, stuffed toys and, of course, chocolate. But it feels like you just celebrated New Years and now it’s almost Valentine’s Day? If it’s going to be like this, summer is going to be on you before you know it.

“Valentine’s Day guys!” she exclaims when no one says anything, her voice a mixture of excitement and frustration. “And since none of us are dating anyone you know what that means, right!? We are drinking!”

“Should we organize another mixer?” another friend, Jieun, suggests. “Just because none of us are dating anyone doesn’t mean that we can’t find anyone.”

Heeji slaps her on the back. “That is a great idea, Jieun! I’ll leave it to you to find us some cuties!”

Everyone else around the table starts cheering and chatting happily about the possibility of meeting someone and it turning to something more. However, you’re nowhere near as excited as they are at the thought of a mixer. You’re not against going out drinking with just your friends, but going to a mixer is not ideal. You haven’t really told them about your secret crush on Saeran yet. But going to a mixer feeling the way you do doesn’t seem fair. Not to you, and not to any person who might be interested in you at that mixer.

“Um…” you squeak and everyone’s eyes are on you. You take a deep breath, “I… can’t go.”

“Whaaat?” Heeji whines loudly. “Why not?”

“I…” you try to think of something to say. There isn’t much you can say to keep Heeji from dragging you to that mixer, but you need to think of something, so you say the first thing that comes to mind. “Actually, the truth is… I have a date!”

Everyone at the table stares at you silently. Do they not believe you? Is it because you’re just saying that now? They all glance amongst themselves before Jieun takes it upon herself to say what everyone must be thinking. “You… Have a date?”

“I-I do!” you answer firmly, there’s no going back now that you’ve said it.

“Really?”

“Really.”

“Why didn’t you say anything sooner?” Heeji nearly squeals and grabs you by the hands excitedly, her eyes practically sparkling.

“I was… embarrassed…” you mumble, unable to look her in the eye.

“Oh, you know there’s no need for that!” Jieun interjects encouragingly. “I’m so happy for you though! Don’t worry about coming to the mixer, okay?”

“Ah… Are you sure?” The whole point of your lie was to get you out of this, but seeing your friends so excited over this fake date is tugging hard on your sense of guilt.

“Of course! We don’t want to get in the way of your hot date! Make sure you send us pictures, okay?”

Despite the sinking feeling in your stomach, you nod. Now that it’s gone this far, you have to see this lie through to the end.

That means you need to find a date.

When you get home from meeting up with your friends, Saeran’s in the kitchen eating some ice cream. This is perfect. If you're going to be going on a fake date, you'd much rather it be with him than anyone else. But before you can go on a date with him you’ve got to ask first. “Hey Saeran?”

“Mm?” he responds as he takes a bite.

“…a-are you free on Wednesday?” you stammer, feeling a sudden wave of nerves taking over you. Even though this isn’t supposed to be a real date just asking him is scary enough.

“…yeah, why?”

“Um, well, I was hoping you could maybe do me a favor…”

Saeran puts down his spoon and eyes you curiously. It’s not too often you come around asking for favors, especially from him. When he doesn’t say anything, you realize that he wants you to elaborate before he agrees to help you out. Which seems fair enough.

“So, uh,” you pause for a second to gather up your courage. “ I.. I was… I waswonderingifyoucouldgooutonadatewithme!”

The words come out in more of a flurry than you intend for them to. Saeran looks utterly confused though, meaning you’ll have to ask again. You take a deep breath and speak again, this time a little more slowly. “I was… wondering if you could go on a date with me on Wednesday.”

“…isn’t that Valentine’s Day?”

You nod slowly, feeling a heat slowly encroaching on your face. Truthfully, you’re a bit surprised that he knows, but then again his brother and his fiancee, the most lovey dovey couple that you know, have probably been talking about it.

He stares wordlessly at you, but you see a pink flush rise in his cheeks. Then he looks away, from you and stutters out, “…w-why?”

“Oh… um…” you laugh a bit from embarrassment. You might as well tell him. “Truth is… my friends wanted to go to a mixer that day, but I don’t really want to go, so I told them I was going on a date…”

Saeran doesn’t say anything and you peek over at him. The blush he had going on is now gone, replaced with a moderately annoyed look. After a moment he says, in a rather abrasive tone, “…so you only want to go on a date so you don’t have to go to this mixer?”

If you were going to be perfectly honest, you’d actually like to go on a legitimate date with him. But… you can’t bring yourself to say it, so all you can do is nod.

“…no,” Saeran answers with a sense of finality and stands, empty bowl in hand. He walks over to the sink and begins to wash it instead of just leaving it for someone else.

You sigh, your heart sinking from the rejection. It would have been too easy, too perfect if Saeran had said yes. You’re not sure if you’d been counting on him saying yes, but you don’t really want to ask anyone else… You’ve made your bed, though, so now you’ve got to lie in it. If Saeran won’t go on this date with you that just means you’ve got to find someone else. You reach into your pocket and grab your phone and start to mumble to yourself, “…maybe I’ll ask Zen… or Yoosung… one of them might say yes.”

“What.”

You nearly jump, surprised that Saeran is still in the kitchen. He’s giving you a dirty look that’s a mixture of anger and disbelief. Under the harsh scrutiny, you start to explain yourself,“S-since you said no, I thought I’d maybe ask someone else…”

He continues to glare at you, “…why do you need to go on a date with someone so badly?”

“Because I told my friends I was!” you answer. Maybe it would have been better to not lie to them in the first place… But you can only imagine how mad… or how hurt they’ll be if they find out you lied to get out of the mixer. “…they asked for pictures, so I can’t just say that I went on a date… I need some kind of proof.”

“Mmm…” Saeran’s expression changes as he seems to be mulling something over. Could he be… reconsidering? You don’t really want to get your hopes up in case he’s not, but if he is… After some internal debate, he finally grumbles “…Fine. I’ll do it.”

“R-really?” you can’t help but stare at him. Just a bit ago he seemed very against the idea. And now he’s agreeing? What brought the sudden change of heart? “You sure?”

“…yeah,” he replies, albeit a bit gruffly. You’re just about to cheer but he raises his hand to stop you. It seems him doing this for you comes with conditions. But that’s okay, you figured something like that. “…you need to give me chocolate.”

You blink. Chocolate? That’s all he wants? You’d thought that he’d maybe demand something more of you. Slave for a day or something like that… But then again, Saeran’s got a bit of a sweet tooth and Valentine’s chocolates are pretty darn good. You always like to buy them when they’re discounted after Valentine’s is over. “Okay, I’ll get you some chocolates.”

“No,” Saeran crosses his arms and gives you a smug look. You do not like where this seems to be going. “I want homemade chocolate.”

All the color drains from your face. Homemade chocolate? He can’t be serious, can he? “Saeran, you know as well as I do that I can’t cook to save my life. It’d be better for all of us if I just bought chocolate.”

Saeran merely shrugs. He doesn’t seem to care in the slightest even though he really should. It’s his own health that’s at stake here. “Homemade chocolate or no date.”

You groan, “…it’s your grave that you’re digging.”

He shrugs again and heads back toward his room, “It can’t be that hard. It’s just chocolate.”

You let out a heavy sigh. That’s what he thinks.

“Ugh…” you grumble quietly as you scroll through recipes on your phone in the living room.

Whenever you think of Valentine’s chocolate, the image of a bunch of different bite sized chocolates encased in a giant heart shaped box comes to mind. However, after a simple web search it appears that homemade valentine’s chocolate extends to more than just candies. It includes cookies, cakes, brownies… almost the entire dessert spectrum. You reach up to rub your temple. This too complicated. Why did he have to ask for something homemade? It really would have been so much easier to buy something.

“Whatcha doin’~” Saeyoung’s voice calls from behind and you turn your head to see him peering over your shoulder, looking at your phone.

“I’m… trying to find a good recipe for a Valentine chocolate…” you answer sulkily.

“Oh?” he circles around the couch and plops down on the other end. Saeyoung shoots you a playful grin. “Who’re you making it for~?”

You give him a flat stare. The look on his face makes it obvious that he knows the answer. He seems to realize too, because he laughs, and says, “I think anything he’d like anything you make.”

You glance back at your phone, eyeing the various pictures of desserts on the screen. He’s right, though, Saeran would like any one of these. Your main concern is whether or not you can make them so that they’re safe for human consumption. Maybe you can, if you stick to just one recipe… But they all seem so good. It’s hard to pick. You groan, “Buying something would be definitely easier.”

“Then why don’t you?” his grin suddenly turns mischievous. “You know, I-”

“I am not buying your brother one of your shady products,” you cut him off before he says anything more. You vaguely remember him talking about making some special candy product for Valentine’s that may or may not involve kimchi chocolate. There’s no way in hell you’re giving Saeran one of those. He’d hate you forever! “Besides, he wants something homemade.”

“Ohh~ Is that so~” Saeyoung’s tone gives you the feeling that he knows something that you don’t. But he always seems to give off that kind of aura. “You know, you could just buy something and say it’s homemade.”

You frown. It’s not like you hadn’t considered it, but you don’t want to lie to Saeran. Even if that means subjecting him to your abysmal cooking. You’ll just have to try your hardest.

“You want to make him something, don’t you~? Is it because you really li-” you promptly cut Saeyoung off, by whacking him the face with a pillow. But just because he didn’t finish the sentence doesn’t mean you don’t know what he was going to say. You feel your entire face heat up from embarrassment..

“I-Is your fiancee making you something too?” you decide to try and change the subject.

Saeyoung shoots you a mocking glance, but still answers your question. “That’s right~ She said it’d have PhD. Pepper in it too~”

You blink. A soda flavored chocolate? That sounds kind of interesting. Maybe she’ll have leftovers for you to try.

“Oh!” Saeyoung exclaims, as if he’s just realized something. “Why don’t you ask her for help? I’m sure she’d be more than willing, especially if you tell her it’s for Saeran!”

That’s actually a good idea. You’ll have to make sure to ask her next time you see her.

Knock, knock, knock.

You roll over on your bed and grab your phone off the side table to check the time. It’s only nine in the morning. You can afford to sleep a little longer. If you don’t answer, maybe whoever it is at the door will leave you alone for now and come back later. You pull the covers over your head and close your eyes again, hoping that you can get back to sleep soon.

Knockknockknock.

The person at your door knocks again, this time with a little more urgency. You consider trying to ignore them still, but then they knock a third time, and you finally relent, reluctantly raising from your bed to answer the door. On the other side is Saeyoung’s fiancee, grinning cheerfully at you.

“Good morning!” she chirps.

“…morning…” you respond sleepily. “…what’s up?”

She shoots you a knowing grin and leans closer to whisper, “So~ A little birdy told me that you needed some help making Valentine’s chocolate for Saeran, is that right?”

You nod slowly.

The young woman claps her hands together excitedly. “Great! I’m planning on going to the store and grabbing stuff to make Saeyoung’s cupcakes today, so if you’d like you’re welcome to come with!”

It’d be a good idea to go with her. If you do, she might be able to help give you some ideas on what to make Saeran. Plus, it helps that she’s the best cook in the house, so she can give you some pointers so you don’t accidentally poison Saeran. You give her a nod and her smile widens.

“I was going to leave in about twenty minutes, so that gives you time to get ready!” the young woman chortles happily before skipping off.

You shut your door so you can change. As you’re grabbing something to wear it occurs to you  that you’ll have to think of an outfit to wear on your ‘date’ with Saeran. Of course, you could just not since it’s not a real ‘date’ but part of you also wants to look decent. Plus, you have to send pictures to your friends, so it’d be best to look as cute as you can, right?

But you can worry about that later, your primary concern is the chocolate. You toss on something decent, grab your phone and wallet and leave your room  to go to the bathroom so you can fix your hair and brush your teeth. Just as you’re about to reach out and open the bathroom door, it opens, revealing Saeran. You step aside so that he can move past and he comments, “Are you guys are going to make the chocolates today?”

“…um, maybe. I know we’re going shopping for the stuff for sure today.”

He gives you a smile and you’re not sure if he’s actually means it or if he’s just mocking you, “I look forward to it.”

“I’ll… do my best,” you respond a bit gruffly, heading into the bathroom. God, you hope Saeyoung’s fiance can help you make something edible. If he’s mocking you, that’ll teach him and if he’s not… well, he’ll be happy, which is good too.  A win-win situation. You quickly get ready and head out to the living room where Saeyoung’s fiancee awaits.

“Ready to go?” she asks.

“Yep.”

At that moment, Saeyoung bounds out of the foyer, twirling a set of keys on his fingers, “Then let’s go~”

The three of you head to the garage and hop into Saeyoung’s largest and least conspicuous looking car. The ride to the store is rather short due to Saeyoung’s speedy driving so you don't really have time to look up any potential recipes. He drops the two of you off, saying he’ll be back in about an hour or so before speeding off.

You follow Saeyoung’s fiancee into the store, quickly stepping aside to grab a cart to deposit your purchases before returning to her. She walks briskly through the store like a woman on a mission, grabbing things for cupcakes like flour, eggs and…. Potato chips?

“Are we getting some snacks for Saeyoung too?” you wonder aloud. She grabbed Saeyoung’s favorite flavor so maybe he wanted her to pick some up while you guys were here.

“Oh! No, actually,” she giggles. “I thought it’d be cool to top Saeyoung’s cupcakes with chocolate covered potato chips!”

You’re not sure how to feel about ‘chocolate covered potato chips.’ On the one hand it sounds absolutely weird (and right up Saeyoung’s alley) and on the other, the mix of salty and sweet sounds kind of appealing. It’s something you’d have to try to decide if it’s something you’d like or not.

“But enough of what I’m planning, what do you want to do?”

“I… still have no clue,” you admit with a sigh. “I was hoping to find some inspiration at the store.”

“Hmm, I see~” she hums thoughtfully. “Well… do you want to try baking something? You don’t have to make cupcakes like I am. You could try cookies or brownies.”

You can’t help but make a face. There’s something about baking that’s even more terrifying than regular cooking is to you. People have told you that you can get away with fudging measurements and times with cooking, but not baking. Apparently, baking is an exact science where you could mess the entire thing up if you don’t follow the directions to the letter.

Saeyoung’s fiancee laughs, “I’ll take that as a no, then. There are other things you can make that don’t involve an oven.”

“…yeah, but they’ll probably involve the stove,” you grumble.

“If it didn’t it wouldn’t really count as homemade…”

“Good point,” you sigh. “So what kinds of things could I make…?”

“Hm…” she taps a finger to her lips as she thinks. “Well, there’s fudge, truffles… You could probably also do chocolate covered strawberries- that’d be super easy!”

That they would be. You know they sell microwavable kits for chocolate dipped fruit too, so you wouldn’t even have to use the stove. But something about it seems… cheap. It’s a strange feeling. You want to do something easy, but at the same time, you really want to wow Saeran despite the limits of your own capabilities. Either way, you make note of it- you can do it if the other two suggestions don’t pan out.

You pull out your phone and do a quick web search for fudge recipes. That looks simple enough too. It seems you can flavors other than just plain chocolate too. It’d be a little more work, but it seems doable. You open another window in your phone’s browser and search for truffles. The initial result gives you mushrooms so you try again, this time specifying that you’re looking for chocolate truffles. The search results you get this time look far more favorable, but damn those look fancy, far fancier than the fudge or chocolate covered strawberries. One result boasts a list of seventeen easy recipes so you check that. Skimming through the first recipe, you find that it’s kind of similar to the fudge recipe but more effort is required since you’re shaping it too. You scroll through the other recipes, trying to decide if it’s worth the extra effort for these truffles when one particular image catches your eye. That looks kind of like…

“Well, did you find something?” Saeyoung’s fiancee asks, noticing that you’ve been quiet for a while.

“..yeah,” a smile starts to slowly form on your face. It might be a bit hard, but you just might be able to pull it off. And if you can, you just know it’ll be totally worth to see Saeran’s amazed face when he gets what you have planned. “…I think I did.”

When you and Saeyoung’s fiancee get home from the store, none other than Saeran is waiting for the two of you in the kitchen. You have a sneaking suspicion that he wants to get a sneak peek at whatever chocolate surprise you have planned for him. But as soon you get all the groceries in the kitchen Saeyoung's fiancee shooes both twins out the kitchen so you can put the classified goods away. It seems that while Saeyoung knows that his Valentine’s chocolate has PhD Pepper in it, he doesn’t much else about it. And obviously, his fiancee wants to keep it that way.

Once everything is all put away, you head back toward your room since the chocolate making will all be happening tomorrow when both boys are out of the house. Saeran, after getting kicked out of the living room, seems to have settled himself on the living room couch, busying himself with a botany encyclopaedia. Just as you’re about to pass him, he closes the book and looks up at you, “Hey.”

“Yeah?”

“I wanted to ask something about our… date,” he hesitates on that last word, looking flustered as he says it.

“Sure, what’s up?”

Saeran doesn’t respond right away and after a moment he slowly says, “What were you planning on doing?”

“….to be honest, I haven’t really thought about it,” you admit shamefully.

“…why not? Since this was your idea, don’t you think you should be the one thinking up the plans?” Saeran complains snarkily.

“Well, I’ve been a bit preoccupied since someone requested I make them homemade chocolates,” you bite back. “Trying to make sure that I don’t kill you, you know.”

Saeran frowns, but doesn’t give you a smartass retort. Sounds like you win this one. You sigh and plop down on the couch next to him, “…why don’t we think up something together? It’ll be better that way, don’t you think?”

When Saeran perks up a little you can’t help but wonder if maybe this is what he wanted all along. It makes sense for him to want to have some input on what you do, he probably doesn’t want to be dragged around doing just stuff you want to do when he was already so reluctant to go on this date. You snicker a little and ask, “…do you already have something in mind?”

He blushes, making it obvious that you hit the nail on the head. Does that mean he’s actually been thinking about this date? Maybe, despite his outward reluctance, he’s actually been looking forward to this? Your heart starts to race a little at the thought of it, but you shake your head a tiny bit. You need to focus, and you don’t want to let yourself get disappointed if you turn out to be wrong.

Saeran pouts a bit, but reaches into his pocket to pull out his phone. He unlocks it and brings up a window before extending it in your direction, “…maybe we can do this?”

You gingerly take his phone so you can examine what he’s showing you more closely. It seems to be a webpage for a restaurant that’s doing a special promotion for Valentine’s Day. You skim through the details but it seems they’re offering an exclusive three course dinner. Once you see the dessert that’s part of this dinner you immediately understand why Saeran wants to go here. It’s a specially handcrafted ice cream and cake dessert that looks almost too pretty to eat.

“I think that’s fine,” you say, handing Saeran his phone.

His eyes light up, but he still asks to confirm, “…you’re sure?”

“Of course! I mean, you’re doing me a favor by going on this date in the first place,” you reason, then, after a second, you hastily add. “Plus the dinner looks really good, especially the dessert.”

“…yeah…”

“So, we’ll do that then!” you grin, glad that you now have a solid plan for the date. “…oh, but it looks like we need reservations. I guess I should call…”

“I’ll do it,” Saeran says a little suddenly.

“Oh, really? Thanks!” You’re glad that he’s decided to take that on since it’s one less thing to worry about, though it seems strange for him to volunteer so readily.  “…is there anything else you want to do?”

Saeran’s expression turns contemplative. He seems to have something on his mind, and you wait for him to voice what it might be. But instead he says, “…no, it’s not a real date, so it’s not necessary to do more than that.”

Is it just you or does he sound a bit… disappointed? He really seemed like he was thinking of something, but apparently not. You mask your own sense of disappointment behind a smile, “…that’s right, huh… I just wanted to know just in case….”

You laugh a little, but it feels a bit forced. Hopefully, Saeran can’t tell. You rise to your feet and say, “Now that we know what to do, we’re pretty much set, right? …well, I still have to make the chocolates, but we’re doing that tomorrow so. Uh.”

God, this feels so awkward now. You don’t know what to say. “I’ll… I’ll try to make sure they’re edible!”

Saeran nods a little and you rush back to your room. Once you get there, you shut the door and lean against it. It’s supposed to be a fake date, so you don’t know why you’re getting one little thing like that get you all riled up. Is it because he showed some interest in it? Because he had an idea? Did that give you hope?

Did you want this fake date to be something more?

When you think about it, the answer to all of these questions is yes. You want him to be interested. You want to have hope. You want this date to be something more than fake. You want all that because you have feelings for him.

Maybe the need for a fake date prompted you to actually ask him, but you didn’t need to tell him it was fake. You could have just said that you wanted to go on a date. Who knows? He might have said yes.

Feeling frustrated, you hold your head in your hands. All you can do now is hope it goes well. Maybe if it does, it can spark something more…

The day has finally come. It’s finally Valentine’s Day. Saeran told you that your reservation at the restaurant was for 5PM, and, despite yourself, you spend pretty much the entire afternoon rifling through your entire wardrobe to find something suitable to wear. You definitely don’t want to look like you’re trying too hard, but you also don’t want to look like you don’t give a damn about this date.

Because you do! But you don’t. It’s kind of confusing whenever you try to think of your expectations concerning this date, so you try not to.

“I think this looks okay…” you mutter, looking over your chosen outfit for what feels like the millionth time. What you ended up choosing isn’t the cutest thing you own, but you could probably count it somewhere in your top three outfits. Maybe you should try on one of the other ones just in case.

A sudden knocking on your door causes you to nearly jump and you scramble to grab your phone. You knew the time was getting close but you didn’t realize it was already 4:30! The person at the door knocks again and you answer, “Yes?”

After a minute, the door opens and Saeyoung’s fiancee peeks in, “I-I don’t mean to rush, but are you almost ready?”

“Uh, yeah!” You wonder if maybe Saeran sent her to check on you. If he’s already ready, you don’t want to keep him waiting any longer, but… “Hey, quick question, is what I’m wearing okay?”

She gives you an inquisitive glance and steps into your room to get a better look at your outfit. Her face lights up instantly, and she nearly squeals, “You look absolutely adorable! Saeran’s gonna love it!”

“Ah… I don’t know about that… It’s a fake date, after all.” But despite that, you still find yourself blushing at the compliment.

“Fake or not, it’s still a date,” she chides while wagging a finger at you. “And who knows, maybe it’ll become real along the way.”

Something about her expression makes it seem like she knows something you don’t. The look reminds you of the one Saeyoung gave you a couple days back. You have the feeling you know what they’re hinting at but it’s better not to hope.

“I… guess,” you sigh.

“Now, none of that!” Saeyoung’s fiancee scolds you as she forcefully bops you on the nose. “He’s waiting for you, you know?”

“Tell him I’ll be out there in a minute.”

Saeyoung’s fiancee nods before leaving the room. Once she’s gone, you grab the delicately wrapped box filled with the chocolates you made for Saeran and stare at it. You figured your room was a safer place to store them just in case Saeran tried to sneak a taste. Luckily, all your hard work managed to yield something edible. According to Saeyoung’s fiancee (since you were far too nervous to try them yourself), they even taste good. Part of you doubts her words, thinking maybe she was just being nice, but another part thinks she’d tell you if they were bad, you doubt she’d intentionally poison her soon to be brother in law.

A loud shout from the living room reminds you that you’re on a time crunch and you jam the box into a gift bag and hurry into the living room. As you approach, you can hear Saeyoung and his fiancee trying to soothe Saeran as he gripes about you taking so long to get ready. But as soon as you enter the room, all conversation seems to cease.

“I’m sorry I took so long,” you apologize, feeling a bit nervous since everyone’s eyes are on you. “We won’t be late, will we?”

When Saeran doesn’t answer right away, you turn your attention toward him. He’s staring right at you, but he seems to be in a daze for some reason.

“…Saeran?”

“Huh?” he seems to snap out of it. “…it’s not too far, we should be fine.”

You let out a relieved sigh. It’d suck if you missed the reservation, especially if it was because you took too long to get ready. Saeran waves you over toward him so you can leave, and you realize that he actually put some effort into his appearance for this date. His normally unruly hair has been combed down a bit, and he’s decked out in a suit, tie, blazer and all. It makes you kind of wish you’d actually gone with your number one outfit.

“Uh…” you debate whether or not you should actually say something or not. Saeran glances questioningly down at you, and you gulp. Might as well. “You look… good.”

Saeran’s eyes widen and he averts his gaze, an obvious blush spreading across his cheeks. “…you…too.”

That, in turn, causes you to turn red. You weren’t expecting that. “I… I’ll give you the chocolates after dinner. Don’t want you ruining your appetite.”

Saeran looks a bit nonplussed that he has to wait, but doesn’t voice any complaints.

The two of you stand there, somewhat awkwardly, for a moment, before Saeyoung strides over, draping an arm around both yours and Saeran’s shoulders. “Now kids, you go out there and have a good time, but don’t stay out too late~”

Saeran swats at his brother, but Saeyoung evades the attack, giggling as he flees to safely behind his fiancee. Clearly annoyed,  Saeran shoots a glare in Saeyoung’s direction before ushering you toward the garage. When you get there, he grabs a set of keys off the wall before leading you to one of Saeyoung’s cars, hitting the remote to unlock it as you get close.

“Wait a sec!” you exclaim, stepping around Saeran, putting yourself between him and the car, “We’re taking one of your brother’s cars?”

“Yeah. So?”

You’re just surprised is all. Saeyoung treats his cars as if they’re his babies. But then again, if his ‘precious little brother’ asked to drive one you can’t really see Saeyoung turning him down. “Wait, can you even drive?”

Saeran clicks his tongue, “Of course. Did you think my brother was going to drive us around?”

If you’re going to be honest, yes. You laugh a bit nervously instead of answering and Saeran lets out an exasperated sigh. He steps past you once more and around to the passenger side of the car. Wait. Didn’t he just say he was driving? You’re about to ask when he opens the door and motions for you to take a seat. Stunned by the sudden gentlemanly gesture, you merely gawk at him. After a moment, Saeran clears his throat, and you hurriedly sit. “Th-thanks…”

Saeran shuts the door as soon as you’re in the seat and moves to the driver’s side. He slides into his seat and puts the key in the ignition,  turning the car on. Then, Saeran takes a deep breath before he pulls out if the parking spot.

The ride to the restaurant teaches you two things: one, Saeran indeed knows how to drive and two, it had to be Saeyoung who taught him. No other sane person would drive like that and live to tell the tale. Because of that, Saeran manages to get the both of you to the restaurant a couple minutes before the reservation time.

Just like he did when you left he comes around and opens the car door for you, this time extending a hand to help you out. Hesitantly, you take his hand and set the chocolates down on the seat. You immediately note how sweaty his hand feels. Is he nervous? Or something else? He gently tugs you out of the car and leads you to the restaurant, his hand still firmly holding onto yours.

Inside, the restaurant is packed with at least a dozen other couples obviously waiting to get a seat. Saeran merely walks past them and up to the hostess, who greets him with a smile.

“I have a reservation at five for two,” he tells her smoothly.

“Your name?” the hostess asks automatically.

“Saeran Choi.”

She stares at him for a moment before looking down at the computer in front of her and after a second says, “It’ll be just a moment, sir.”

Saeran nods and steps away off to the side. You follow after, stopping so you’re standing side by side. The notification sound from your phone goes off and you reach into your bag to pull it out. Of course, it’s a text from Heeji.

hope ur date is going well! Don’t forget the pics u promised!

Shit! That’s right! You said you’d take pics for them, didn’t you? Since the two of you are still waiting to be seated, it might be a good time to take a quick picture. The lighting in the lobby is relatively bright, so the picture should come out fairly well. “Hey Saeran?”

“Mmm?”

“Do you mind if we take a selfie real quick?” you ask, clapping your hands together to plead with him.

“…why?”

“To commemorate our date, of course!” you exclaim, then add, as an afterthought. . “…also because my friends are asking.”

Saeran gives you a deadpan look, ordinarily that would mean no, but you can’t let that deter you. Part of the reason you’re on this date in the first place is because you need visual evidence. You give him the good old puppy dog eyes, hoping that maybe you’ll be able to sway him, “Come on, please? Just one little picture?”

It doesn’t seem like Saeran’s going to relent, so you start to think of ways to possibly barter with him. But to your surprise, he gives in rather easily, “…okay, fine.”

You let out a small cheer and open the camera app on your phone. It’s set to the rear-facing camera, so you have to switch to the front-facing one. Once that’s set, you scooch closer to Saeran and angle the camera so that the both of you are visible. You raise your free hand and make a little finger heart with your thumb and index finger. Then you nudge Saeran with your elbow, “Hey, you do it too!”

“… why?”

“It’s cute, don’t you think?”

“I… guess.” But despite his reluctant tone,  Saeran still raises a hand, mimicking the gesture. You adjust the camera a little more before giving him more instructions, “Great! Now smile!”

You beam widely, then hit the shutter button in the side of your phone a second later. The screen flashes and you hear a click, meaning the picture’s been taken. You relax from your pose to check the picture you’ve taken. Unfortunately, Saeran isn’t sporting the huge grin you’d been aiming for, but there is a faint smile on his face. You like it. It’s very…  Saeran.

He peeks over your shoulder look at the picture and after a second asks in a confused tone, “You’re not gonna ask to take another one?”

“Nope!” you chirp, attaching the photo to a text you’re sending to Heeji. “I actually think this one came out pretty nice!”

“Even if I’m not smiling like an idiot?”

“Yep.” You hit the send button . “This suits your personality better.”

Saeran turns red and looks away from you. “…will you send me a copy of that picture too?”

You blink. Now it’s your turn to be confused. “Why?”

He turns even more red, “I… just… it’d be just useful is all!”

“For… what?”

“I-in case I need to tell someone I have a girlfriend or something!” he nearly spits at you. It doesn’t make a whole lot of sense to you, Saeran doesn’t seem like the kind of guy to make up a girlfriend for any reason. But none the less, you send him a copy of the picture.

The hostess calls for the two of you and you walk back up to the desk. You notice a few of the others waiting to be seated give the two of you envious stares. Most of them were there before you, so you can only guess they didn’t have a reservation and are stuck waiting until either someone doesn’t show or if someone leaves early. You can only imagine how long the wait must be.

The hostess grabs a couple menus and leads you to wherever you’ll be sitting. She asks a couple standard questions like how’s your night been and if it’s your first time at the restaurant which Saeran answers. You kind of thought it when you got here but now that you’re walking through the restaurant, you realize that this place is really fancy. When you get to the table, the hostess pulls out one of the chairs for you, and you sit as she moves around the table and pulls out the other for Saeran. Then she hands you both the menu and reaches for the napkin on the table. With a graceful wave of her arm, she undoes it and places it neatly on your lap, then does the same for Saeran. Yep. This place is totally fancy.

“Narae will be your server today,” the hostess informs you. “She’ll be over in just a moment.”

Both you and Saeran nod before looking back at the menu. You recognize it as the special Valentine’s menu that Saeran showed you a couple days ago. At the time, you’d only really paid attention to the dessert since you figured that’s what he wanted to come here for, but the appetizer and entree choices look really good too…

A young woman, who you assume is your server walks up to the table, “Hi guys, I’m Narae and I’ll be your server for the night. Can I start you guys off with some drinks? Some wine perhaps?”

“Just water is fine for me,” you answer. You don’t really feel like drinking right now.

She looks at Saeran who says, “Water for me too.”

“Would you guys like some Perrier? Or is just regular water alright?”

“Uh… just regular water is okay.”

“Alright!” She bobs her head up and down cheerfully. “And are you guys ready to order or do you still need a couple minutes?”

“A couple more minutes, please.”

“Okay! I’ll get your waters and put your appetizer in the meantime! ” The waitress reaches over and takes the two wine glasses off the table since you and Saeran won’t be having any need of them.  When she’s gone you redirect your attention to the menus, trying to decide on an entree. Luckily, the entree choices for this special Valentine’s menu is limited to just two, but…

“The steak and the ravioli both sound really good…” you lament, unable to choose.  “…which one are you gonna order, Saeran?”

“Mmm… Dunno…” he responds, eyebrows scrunched as he examines the menu himself. If anything he’s probably more focused on the dessert than the main course so he may not really care either way…

“… hey, I’ve got an idea!” you exclaim suddenly. Saeran gives you an inquisitive look and you explain.  “Why don’t you order one entree and I’ll order the other and we can try both!”

Saeran just stares at you blankly. Was that a bad idea? Was it too… couple-y? You raise your hands, ready to take back what you’ve said, but before you can, Saeran nods a bit, “…yeah… That’s fine.”

“Awesome!” you cheer, glad to have solved that problem. Is it just you or has Saeran been more amicable since you left the house? You would have figured he'd be a lot more reluctant to agree with you on anything given the situation. But this entire time he's been... nice. Like he's trying to be a good date, despite the situation.

As if on cue, your server reappears by your table, she pours water in your glasses from a pitcher and asks, “Are you guys ready to order?”

“Yes!” you look back down at the menu even though there’s no need to since you know what you want. “Can I get the pasta and he’ll have the steak?”

“Of course!” The waitress smiles, apparently committing the orders to memory. “How would you like your steak, sir?”

Saeran looks up and answers after a beat, “Medium rare.”

“Excellent! I’ll go put those in right away! The first course should be coming up soon!”

“Okay, thank you!” you smile, and the waitress bows a bit, taking the menus from both you and Saeran before walking off.

When she’s gone you glance over at Saeran, who’s just sitting there quietly. It’ll be awkward if you both just sit here silently the entire meal, so until the appetizer comes, you’ve got to try and think of something to talk about.

“So, this place is really fancy!” you say, looking around at the interior. “How’d you hear about it?”

“A famous pastry chef works here,” he explains. “I saw a special about her on TV.”

“Ohhhh.” That makes sense, despite how good the other courses are, the both of you are really here for the dessert. “Is that why it’s so busy here?”

“Maybe.”

“Then it’s really good we were able to get a reservation on such short notice!” With all those couples that had been waiting, you have the feeling that maybe the restaurant starts taking reservations for Valentine’s at least a couple months in advance. A triumphant smirk slowly spreads across Saeran’s face. You stare at him, confused why he’s got that look on his face. Then it clicks. He did something, didn’t he? You shoot him a suspicious glare and lean closer so that no one nearby can hear you. “Did you do something?!”

Saeran gives a noncommittal shrug, which, to you, is the same as admitting guilt.

You groan, “Saeran. Didn’t you see all those people waiting? You can’t just ha-”

“Wait a second,” he raises a hand to cut you off. “I didn’t hack anything.”

You throw him a pointed stare. “Really?”

He gives you a pouty glare before looking away. “…the day you asked to go on this date I called about a reservation.”

You blink. That means he’d been thinking about coming here before you even discussed it? You’d realized he’d must have wanted to since he so readily suggested it, but you didn’t think he’d actually been thinking of it since the very beginning… Maybe that’s why he’d been so eager to make the reservation instead of letting you do it.

“They were full, obviously,” he continues, grumbling as he goes. “But I called everyday to ask if anyone had cancelled. Eventually someone did and they gave me that person’s slot.”

When he’s done, he looks away from you, blushing once more. Finally, you ask, “…did you really want to come here that badly?”

He nods, still refusing to look at you.

“I… see… I’m sorry for accusing you of using… unsavory methods to get this reservation,” you bow your head down. He must have been really happy when he’d scored that reservation. The dessert here must really be out of this world if he called everyday trying to get a reservation.

One of the waitstaff comes over to your table with a tray, and you figure that must be the appetizer. You’ve maybe been here around ten minutes, so you're a bit surprised it's come out so quickly. Then again since there’s only one appetizer the kitchen is probably cranking it out, especially since it’s such a busy night. The waiter places a bowl of soup in front of the both of you with a cheerful “enjoy!” before walking away.

You look down at the soup, the menu said it was some kind of bisque. It looks kind of creamy. You pick up your spoon and slowly bring it to your mouth to take a small taste. Luckily, it’s not so hot that you can’t eat it… and in fact, it’s really good! You quickly finish off the bowl of soup and find that Saeran has done the same.

Almost as soon as you’re done eating the soup, the entrees arrive. You’re so glad that you suggested that you both of them since they look absolutely delicious. You pick up your fork and examine the ravioli. They’re a bit big to eat in one bite, so you’ll have to use the knife. To be honest, since you use chopsticks to eat most of the time you've only used a knife a handful of times. Since it’s pasta, your fork should be enough to cut it, right? You look up at Saeran to see how he’s doing and find he’s actually pretty good with a fork and knife. Noticing that you’re staring, Saeran looks up at you, “What is it?”

“Oh, just admiring your skills,” you reply honestly.

He smirks at you, “Do you want me to cut your pasta for you?”

“I-I’m fine!” you squeak and Saeran laughs. He looks down at the piece he’s just cut and spears it with his fork before raising it up and holding it toward you like he’s trying to feed you. You stare at the steak and then back up at Saeran. He’s not really….

“Come on, you said you wanted to try it, right?” he tells you in a teasing tone, but despite that his eyes look oddly earnest. Wait a second. This was supposed to be a fake date, wasn’t it? But doing something like this… it makes it feel so real. You’d figured he’d just cut a piece and put it on your plate and you’d do the same… “Well…?”

Either way, you shouldn’t leave him hanging. Shyly, you lean forward and tentatively eat the steak off his fork. As soon as it’s in your mouth you pull back to your seat, and chew the steak slowly. You’re far too embarrassed over what just transpired to even register the taste of the steak and you don’t want to ask for another piece.

“What about mine?”

You redirect your attention toward Saeran, and he’s giving you a shit-eating grin. That little…He’s totally teasing you! Well, two can play at that game. You raise your fork, cut one of the raviolis on the plate in half and thrust it toward his face. In a sickeningly sweet voice you say, “Say ‘ahh,’ sweetie~”

This time it’s Saeran’s turn to stare at the food being presented to him. He turns bright red as he contemplates what to do. After a moment, he lurches forward and eats the ravioli in the same manner as you did just moments before. You smile and ask, “So, how does it taste?”

“…it’s good,” he utters quietly, looking adequately flustered after you tossed that attempt to tease you right back in his face.

You grin victoriously and pick up the other half of the ravioli on the plate and take a bite. He’s right. It is good. The both of you finish off your respective entrees without exchanging another bite with one another. When you’re done, someone comes by quickly and clears the plates off the table. Now it's time for the thing that you’ve both come here for: the dessert.

A couple minutes later, your waitress comes by with a plate and what looks like a metal ladle. When she sets the plate down, the thing on the plate isn’t the dessert Saeran showed you online. Instead, a shiny, bright red, heart shaped candy-like thing is taking up most of the entire plate. You look up at the waitress in confusion, but she gives you a playful smile. She pulls a lighter out of her pocket and ignites it under the ladle, waving it back and forth, heating it, or whatever is in it, up. After a minute or so, she puts the lighter back in her pocket and pours the contents of the ladle over the candy heart. The liquid in the ladle drizzles down the sides of the heart, melting the candy away. You gasp softly when the cake that you’d been expecting is revealed beneath the candy heart. The waitress chuckles at your reaction and places a pair of spoons down for you and Saeran.

“Please enjoy, guys!”

When she’s gone you look up at Saeran, wide eyed, “That was really cool! Did you… know that was going to happen?”

He slowly nods.

“And you didn’t tell me?”

“Would have ruined the fun,” he chuckles, picking up his spoon.

You grab yours and reach to take a scoop of the cake. To be honest, you’re a bit hesitant. It really is too pretty to eat, but you know if you don’t make your claims now, Saeran will just eat it all. When you take a bite, you realize that it tastes every bit as good as it looks. Between the two of you, you finish the cake in record time. Once you’re done, the waitress comes by once more, check in hand.

“How was it, guys?” she asks, setting the check down on the table.

“It was good!” you respond happily. “Thanks so much!”

She laughs a little, “Well, glad to hear you enjoyed it! I’ll be back for the check in a few!”

The waitress walks off, and you reach for the check but Saeran swipes it out of your grasp. “Hey!”

“What?” his voice is all nonchalant. If anything, you should at least pay for dinner since you were the one who invited him at all.

“Let me pay,” you tell him firmly.

“No.”

“But why? I’m the one who invited you!”

Saeran shifts a bit, pulling out his wallet from his pocket. “‘Cause I said so.”

“But!” you cry in protest.

He pulls out a few bills and stuffs them in the folder. “No.”

“At least let me pay half or something,” you try to reason with him, reaching out to try and grab the bill from him, but his arms are too long and you can’t grab it. He quickly waves the waitress over, and she comes by, moving so she can take the bill without you getting too close to it.

“Do you need change, sir?”

“No, you can keep the change.”

“Thank you so much, sir! I hope the two of you have a good rest of the night!”

“Thanks! You too!” you smile, before throwing another glare at Saeran. There was no need for him to pay for dinner, or at least all of it. He merely ignores you and rises from his seat with you following suit. The two of you head out of the restaurant and back toward the car. Once again, he opens the door for you, and this time you sit without hesitation, grabbing the bag of chocolates off the seat before you settle down.

As Saeran moves to the driver’s side, you remember that you didn’t make any plans beyond dinner, so unless you think of something spur of the moment this (fake) date is pretty much over. You can’t help but feel a bit disappointed at the thought. It’s been a little bit awkward at times, but it’s also been kind of fun, and you’re… not really ready to let go of that yet.

Saeran sits down and starts the car and you contemplate whether or not you should say something or not. The worst he could possibly say is no, but that refusal also could imply a more profound rejection. But it’s better to have tried than not, right? You take a deep breath.

“Hey, Saeran?”

“Mmm?”

“Do you…” you falter for a second, before taking another deep breath. “…I think there’s a ferris wheel nearby, right? Do you wanna… maybe go?”

Saeran thinks for a moment, then he says, in a slow voice, “…it might be crowded too… couples like that kind of thing, don’t they?”

He’s got a point. It is Valentine’s Day after all. There will probably be a pretty long line. You sigh, but it can’t be helped. “…I… I guess we should just head back then! I’ll give you your chocolates when we get home!”

Saeran briefly gives you an odd look, before shifting the car into reverse. He pulls out of the parking lot silently, his face scrunched up like he's thinking hard about something. When he turns onto the street you realize he’s driving away from Saeyoung’s house, but not toward the ferris wheel.

“Where are we going?” you ask.

“You’ll see,” is the only answer you get out of him meaning you’ll just have to wait.

As he drives, you reach into your purse to check your phone. Apparently, Heeji showed that picture you sent her to your other friends, because some of them texted you too. All of them are really supportive, which is really nice, though you can’t help but feel a pang of guilt since this was supposed to be a fake date, but… you glance at Saeran, who’s focused on the road before him. It certainly doesn’t really feel that fake, but you can’t get your hopes up either.

“Hey.”

You look at Saeran, confused. “What?”

“Close your eyes for a minute.”

“Huh? Why?”

“Just do it!” Saeran insists, then adds. “…please?”

“O…kay…” you agree and close your eyes. You can feel Saeran turn the car, and the he begins to slow before coming to a complete stop. “…can I open them now?”

“Not yet. I’ll tell you when.”

You hear the door open and shut on his side, then a moment later, your door opens. You reach for your seatbelt and undo it before tentatively reaching for Saeran’s hand. When you find it, he gently tugs you out of the car.

“Oh, bring the chocolate too,” he instructs.

You nod and hold onto the bag. Once you’re out of the car Saeran shuts the door behind you and leads you somewhere. You can hear a distant chatter, so wherever he’s taken you has people, but it doesn’t seem that… populated? But it is a bit of a walk. You shiver a little from the cold. The sweater you’re wearing isn’t doing a good job of keeping you warm, but made to look cute, not functional. Saeran suddenly stops walking, and you nearly bump into him.

“Saeran?” The uncertainty in your voice is evident.

“Just a second.” He lets go of your hand, taking away the small source of warmth you had. You hear a rustling sound and then you feel something warm drop on your shoulders. Is that Saeran’s blazer? He put his jacket over you to keep you warm? The pitter-patter of your heart begins to accelerate. That’s just… not fair.. This isn't a real date… But he just keeps doing things that make you question how fake it really is. You almost open your eyes, but Saeran puts his hand over your eyes. “Wait a little bit longer, we’re almost there.”

“…okay, but are you gonna be okay? Aren’t you cold?”

“…I’m fine,” Saeran replies, grasping your hand once more, this time a little tighter. He pulls you so that you’re closer to him, and that heart rate of yours just jumps through the roof. This is really too much…

You walk a little further, turning every now and then, but eventually Saeran stops moving. Have you arrived at your destination? You’re still not sure where you are. But it smells kind of… floral? No… But something like that… Kind of outdoorsy. Are you at a park or something? You wait for Saeran to give you the okay to open your eyes, though, just in case.

“Go ahead and open your eyes.”

Slowly, you do as he says. The first thing you see is an assortment of bright pink, red and white lights strung up on all of trees. It looks almost like a Christmas display. You look around and it seems you were kind of right- wherever he brought you has all sorts of flowers and other various plants all over, but it seems a bit excessive for a park. “A garden?”

Saeran nods.

“It’s so pretty…” you take a few steps forward to take in the lights. You didn’t know that there were places that did light displays for Valentine’s Day too… It’s really nice. There are a bunch of other couples walking around but the garden is so large that it doesn’t feel crowded at all. “Thanks for bringing me here, Saeran!”

He gives you a tiny smile and approaches you again, ushering you to follow him. Saeran leads you down another, much smaller pathway until you reach a bench. Then he sits down and motions for you to sit down next to him. When you do so, he holds out his hand and you figure he must want those chocolates now. Hesitantly, you hand him the bag. Saeran takes it from you and reaches in, pulling out the box.

“You went all out on the wrapping, huh,” Saeran comments, gently touching the perfectly tied ribbon.

You laugh, albeit a little nervously, “Yeah… I actually had a lot of fun wrapping it up all nice and pretty! Doesn’t account for taste, though…”

“Mmm.” Saeran pulls at the ribbon and you watch with bated breath as he lifts the cover off of the box. You breathe a tiny sigh of relief when you find that all nine of your little truffles didn’t get messed up at all during their time in the box, though you did try to make sure to wrap them well. “These are…?”

“They’re chocolate truffles!” you begin to explain. “I ended up making a bunch of different ones since I wasn’t sure which you’d like best. There’s a strawberry one, a mint chocolate one, a brownie one… when I was looking at pictures of them, they kind of reminded me of scoops of ice cream, so i thought it’d be a good idea… Though I don’t know… Maybe I went kind of overboard making so many different kinds…I do hope you like them though…”

While you’re rambling, Saeran moves his hand so that it’s hovering over the different truffles as if he’s thinking of which one to eat first. He finally chooses one and gingerly picks it up with his thumb and forefinger. Then, he looks at you, “Hey, open up.”

“Wha-” Saeran stuffs the truffle in your mouth while you’re speaking, forcing you to eat it. This taste… it must be the cookie dough truffle. You have to admit that it’s actually pretty good. This is probably the first time you can say that you’ve made something edible. And not just edible, it even tastes good too! Feeling proud of yourself, you can’t help but grin as you swallow. It’s probably not the healthiest thing to be able to make, but at least it’s something.

“So how was it?” Saeran inquires with a serious look. “Was it good? I’m not gonna die if I eat one, right?”

You laugh again, this time more earnestly, “It was good! You’ll be fine if you eat one! But that was the only cookie dough truffle in the box…”

“Oh…” Saeran looks down at the box, then back up at you. “It’s fine.”

You blink. “Are you sure?”

He nods, then he stops moving, hesitation flickering in his eyes. Just as you’re about to ask, he leans down closer to you, closing his eyes as he approaches. He softly presses his lips against yours in a  chaste kiss. Then, after a moment he pulls back, his eyes fluttering back open. He offers you a hazy smile, “…you’re right. It was good.”

You open your mouth and try to say something but no words come out. Did he… He totally did… He just kissed you! You feel all the air in your body escape you and you sag back against the bench. Saeran kissed you. And he said it was good…

While you sit there, stunned over the kiss, he picks up another one of the truffles and pops it in his mouth. You snap back to reality, waiting to see what he says about it. Then you can ask him about that kiss.

“…this is pretty good,” he remarks, grabbing another and eating it. You’re relieved to see that he likes the chocolates that you worked so hard on, but now your focus is elsewhere.

“Saeran, why did you kiss me just now?” you demand, getting straight to the point.

He stops munching on the truffles to look at you, “…isn’t it obvious?”

Your face feels warm and you look away, feeling a bit embarrassed, “But wasn’t this supposed to be a fake date?”

“…maybe to you,” he answers in a meaningful tone, causing you to look back at him. “But it’s been real to me this whole time.”

“…what…?”

His expression grows more exasperated, “…do I really have to write it out in crayon for you?”

“I… uh… yes.” At this point there are some rather obvious conclusions that you can draw, but you’d much rather hear him say it so that there’s no doubt. Saeran sighs, and draws closer once more.

“…will you make me these truffles again next year? Not as a someone asking for a favor, but as my girlfriend?” he asks, looking you directly in the eyes.

“…yes,” you nod your head up and down vigorously.

He grins at your response and leans in for one more chocolate flavored kiss.

[gone-with-the-bling]

11 questions tag

I was tagged by my bling-sis @smoldinopup who is also known as awesome and the great... kkkkk.. too much? Nawwww..

This tag is from happier times.. if I had replied to this immediately after I got it, some of the answers would have looked very different. *sings Bittersweet* 

1.  What’s one bad habit you have that you would like to get rid of?

Oh.. hmm.. I would love to say something simple like biting my nails.. but I don’t do that. One habit that I would like to get rid off is eating to my emotions. The worst is getting an urge to eat when I’m bored.. or watching tv. 

2. What do you want to accomplish most in life?

In the beginning of December I had this idea that I want to somehow participate in promoting women’s rights. I want to be part of something good. On a more personal level, I would like to gain some sort of inner peace. I want to have goals and I’m in progress of making them. With inner peace I mean doing things that I love, pursuing my goals and learning to care less about others’ opinions. Becoming the best version of myself and being at peace with it.  

3. Your pet of choice, and why?

Cat! Because they are soulful and easier to take care of.. kind of :’D... Some time ago I read that cats have less brain activity than dogs.. but to me that just proves how awesome they are even with half a brain.. how superb they would be if they used it fully. It wouldn’t be fair to the rest of us. 

4. Magic fairy Taemin pops up out of nowhere and promises you to teach you one dance, which one would it be? (It can be a SHINee dance, a Taemin dance, it can also be classical ballet or whatever you want to learn. He’s a fairy after all… :’)

Whatever I want?? Well.. I want something sleazy.. let’s do the tango. Also because I’m horrible at following any kind of movement, it’s going to take forever for him to teach me... *dreamy* ahhh let me rest in your arms, strong taem

5. You are allowed to play one game of your choice against Minho. Which one would you choose and why? (everything from Parcheesi to a match of soccer is possible)

I suck at games and I hate losing. But I could play soccer with him just to see his awesome skills, and allow him to brag. It would probably make him happy. He could teach me a couple of skills.. also we could talk about the players since I have my fav.. :’) I could ask his opinion. 

6. Onew and you team up to compete together in a cooking show. Which meal would you make to bedazzle the judges? (It’s a three course meal…)

I can’t cook T_T I suck at this too. I’ll let Jinki decide. I would make pizza with pineapple :’) I would love to try make fusion kitchen with finnish and korean dishes

7. Key rings your doorbell and invites you to a trip to wherever you want to go. Where would you go, and what would you and Key do there?

We would go for a walk with his dogs and maybe shop something nice for them.. Or amusement park.. that could be great too. Or karaoke! Oh yeah! Let’s do that! Booze, karaoke and Key, what more could a girl want. No! I want to take him to the Kemi snowcastle. I think he would appreciate that. 

8. You pop up in Jonghyun’s room (because let’s face it, he wouldn’t leave the house) and have a collection of DVDs/Blue rays in your hands. Which movies would this collection contain, and why?

Wait.. are the DVDs/Blue rays mine or his? Anyway, I would have wanted to watch Star Wars with him. All 9 of them :’) marathon. Because there’s action, bad guys, good guys, epic tale, stars, planets, romance, cute creatures.. 

9. You got snowed in and there is a blackout. What do you do to keep yourself occupied?

Light up my candles, start coloring my mindfulness book..  look outside when the snow falls, read poems, listen soft music with my mp3, just be and breathe.. This would be such a great moment to share with someone

10. You have to babysit Commes Des, Garcons, Roo, Adam, and Eve….what would you do to entertain all five of them? (Please keep in my mind that their puppynalities seem to be qute different - and no, getting buried alive by puppies is no option here :P)

Lock myself in the bathroom with Roo because she seems the easiest??? Like!!!?? How I’m supposed to deal with so many?? Am I lacking imagination?? I could throw a ball.. they would run and start fighting.. I would try to go between them, they would attack me instead and I would die. 

11. Last but not least…you are allowed to only eat one type of food for one year. What’s your food of choice? The one food you think would take you the longest to get annoyed with?

Tortillas. I could change the flavor by different sauces and drinks. 

12. Bonus question: If you could go to a SHINee concert (without having to worry about money) would you rather go to one in Korea or in Japan?)

Well.. any is okay. Before I was thinking that I would like to see one in Japan because the concerts in Japan seemed to have more props etc. But the Korean concerts were cozier, kind of? and they interacted more with the audience. On the other hand they got better at that in Japan as well. Visiting and getting to know either country would be okay. 

If I have a chance in the future I would love to attend any concert of theirs or Taemin’s. 

[acrispyapple]

50 more interesting questions

Rules: fill this out and tag at least one person you’d like to know more about! Or just fill it out! Or don’t! Answer only some of them! Make up your own questions! “What kind of requirement is that”, you ask? A reasonable one! Who am I to tell you what to do? Anything goes!

Tagged by @incorrectmidc i had this open for days and i answered a few questions per night lol @o0w0o and @deathbymidnightcinderella  <3

1. What kind of food can’t you stand? spicy stuff and umm food loaded with exotic spices / herbs

2. If you could choose one minor inconvenience to never have to deal with again, what would you pick? my mouse ending up double clicking after a year or so

3. Have you got any useless talents? i have way too much trivia and animal facts. plus random skills with no practical use. oh and playing the piano is also a useless talent for me since i don’t really “use” it

4. If you were really really good at one thing, what would it be? my answer isn’t an “if” thing lol. i have a really good memory. it really helps with mostly anything i do + it makes studying easier. but sometimes people think it’s creepy that i remember little things about them, they think i keep notes about them or something lol-- but i really do just remember.

5. Name a few people you think are extremely good-looking - umm neil caffrey (matt bomer) from white collar, nick burkhardt (david giuntoli) from grimm, daniel shaw (brandon routh) from chuck -- i seem to have a type haha. omg i forgot jo in-sung. i’ve always thought he was handsome! 

6. What was your favorite way to pass the time as a kid? i was a pretty boring kid. i just read books, watched cartoons, and organized things. as a kid i’d look at my toys but never really play with them because i liked seeing them all set up nicely. i just kept collecting stuff i liked. the most i’d do that’s remotely active was play with my dogs

7. What is something you’re proud of? i do well academically and i learn fast. and somehow i’m proud of how i’ve remained the same over the years.

8. What’s one character flaw in people that you just can’t tolerate? i don’t know if this is considered a character flaw but i really dislike poor manners haha. it drives me crazy when people open their mouth while chewing or if it’s too noisy. i die a bit inside. besides table manners and manners in general, i dislike people who are rowdy during inappropriate times.

9. Do you consider yourself to be more of a leader or a follower? both but to avoid stress sometimes i just want to follow. i’m a bit of a perfectionist / rule follower so i get frustrated a lot. i know not everyone is like a machine but it’s hard with my ocd lol. and no this isn’t just me saying ocd like most people when referring to certain things, i actually do have it and i have medication for it

10. What kind of student are/were you? normal i guess. i got along well with people, i didn’t fail anything, and i never rebelled or did anything wild. it was uneventful lol. i’m still technically a student now, but i see it more as an adult thing.

11. Butterfly effect question! Has there ever been a seemingly minor decision you’ve made (at the time) that ended up having a profound influence on your life? i’m sure everyone has one

12. Name your most irrational fear/aversion well it’s not a fear per se, but i have an aversion to most asian food, sorta? the smell sets me off especially if it has a bunch of spices or herbs in it. my nose is just sensitive and i get affected easily by strong scents. but i’m fine with japanese food, maybe some korean and chinese stuff. for fears, iono, i don’t think it’s irrational to be afraid of spiders and big cockroaches ><

13. Are there any fictional characters you find especially relatable? a bunch haha but it’s mostly people associating them with me first. i’m not tsundere..... how dare they

14. If you drink, what kind of drunk are you? Alternatively, what sort of person are you at parties? i don’t think i’ve ever gotten drunk the way people imagine people getting drunk to be like. i remain the same except i get a headache. i don’t really change at all. and in parties i guess i just stay close to my friends. stranger danger lmao

15. Do you fall in love easily? Or does it usually take a long time for you to trust someone? umm no i do not. i mean i can trust them fine but i don’t think i can believe their feelings until they can prove it isn’t just a short time attraction. i’m in for long term stuff so i don’t really wanna waste time if it’s not headed there. but yeah currently in a long term relationship

16. Would you rather have one close friend or 100 casual friends? having fewer friends makes it easier for me to update all of them without getting tired of repeating the same story over and over haha

17. Do you consider yourself to be more of a slob or a neat-freak? always organized and no one’s allowed to touch my things haha

18. Describe a place (imaginary or real) that you would find incredibly cozy i’ve always wanted a seating area near a huge window with a good view, bunch of pillows, earphones + music

19. Do you have kids? If not, do you want them someday? nah i don’t think i can handle it. i’d probably go insane trying to control them and making them become my idea of what a person should be like

20. What was your favorite book as a child? the chronicles of narnia, still love it to this day because it’s really written well

21. Name one thing you just don’t get what all the hype is about WHAT IN THE WORLD DOES A FIDGET SPINNER DO -- yeah i’m sorry, i think it’s stupid

22. Name one thing that you think is tragically underrated i should have an answer for this but i totally forgot lol

23. If you had to be glued to a person for a month, real or fictional (who you have never met), who would you choose? since im in the midcin fandom i’ll just say byron

24. What’s something you’d like the chance to do someday? visit all the haunted places i’ve ever read about, and prolly explore old ruins. i was way into archaeological finds etc way back

25. Do you typically speak your mind when you have a controversial opinion? Or do generally prefer to not rock the boat? i try to say it in the most courteous way possible. i can’t keep it to myself because it would bother me and my mind would just dwell on it forever but i also don’t like offending people haha

26. What’s the dumbest fad you’ve been caught up in? sTiCkY cApS in chat (but i stopped after a month okay, and i was 12)

27. What’s something you thought was cool as a kid/adolescent, but now cringe at yourself for? typing in sTiCkY CaPs. kill 12 year old me pls

28. What’s a trait you consider to be very admirable? being kind and yet still firm when needed even when it comes to friends. i really admire people who don’t just blindly agree with their peers

29. Is there a particular kind of item people always tend to give you as gifts? (For instance, people always get you things with ducks on them because you like ducks, etc.) people give me stuff with owls, bears, hedgehogs, or stars because i love them. i also love stationery and pens. i like getting different colors and i never use them. i just keep them forever haha

30. Do you speak multiple languages? Which ones? i know a bit of stuff from other languages but not enough to be proud of it. i don’t want to be a poser and claim yeaaaahh i speak this and that lol

31. Would you rather live in the big city or the countryside? city please. i hate the quiet countryside. it’s like if someone comes to kill you and there’s no one around and you’d be all “this is why i should’ve been in the city with people everywhere”

32. Has there ever been something you were certain you’d hate, but ended up loving? byron wagner from midcin. when i first started and i saw him i was all, ehh eyepatch dude. so edgy. lmao. i even purposely skipped him during certain events and i regret that now.

33. Do you mind being the center of attention, or do you prefer the spotlight to be on someone else? i don’t want to be the center of attention, i’d feel awkward

34. Favorite holiday? the usual, christmas and new years eve... but i miss having an actual christmas where it isn’t summer...

35. Are you a more go-with-the-flow type of person, or do you need to have things planned meticulously? i always have a plan lol

36. Is there something you loved so much you wish you could forget it and experience it all over again? (A tv show, book, series–anything.) hmm, i can watch something over and over with no problem. all good

37. What hobbies do you have? reading (but it’s mostly fantasy and sci-fi), watching crap, annoying my dogs, playing video games, making stories in my head. I WISH I COULD WRITE AND DO IMAGERY WELL. oh well

38. If you could have a superpower, but it was only mildly useful, what ability would you want to have? the ability to moisturize instantly, one click. that’ll save me time daily

39. Something people are always surprised to learn about you that i like video games and anime lol. and that i’m happy to talk to them T_T

40. Something that took you way too long to figure out i still don’t know how to knife. how to knife~ i mean how to slice things or chop things or do anything in the kitchen

41. Worst injury you’ve had? is it considered an injury when you’ve had to get 4 major surgeries in a year? i mean i guess tending to / waiting for the surgery scars to get better can be considered an injury since it took a while and it was sorta a pain

42. Any morbid fascinations? umm, i can’t think of one

43. Describe your sense of humor i don’t really know lol. i make a lot of jokes and sometimes it breaks the mood for people lol

44. If you had to be born in another era/place, which would you choose? i really like princess stuff but the real medieval stuff would be dirty people who don’t take baths and really horrible stuff so maybe just the fantasy version of that + high speed internet

45. Something you are irredeemably bad at not rambling when i really like something. to the people who’ve ever had to listen to me whenever i got excited about something-- i’m sorry

46. Something that sucked but you’re glad you went through going to a nature retreat thing 3 months ago or something. i had no internet and it made me cry inside but i guess it was fine

47. Would you rather have a really godawful ugly tattoo in a place that is only slightly inconvenient to conceal with clothing (upper arm, thigh, etc.), or the coolest, most beautiful tattoo ever in the middle of your face? (Neither tattoo can be removed or concealed with makeup, and the ugly tattoo will deeply offend anyone who sees it.) i don’t really want tattoos in general so i guess the ugly one.

48. Are you more of an optimist or a pessimist? optimist

49. What would be the most flattering compliment someone could give you? something that isn’t physical or shallow. i’d be really happy if people noticed my achievements or if they liked something about my personality-- or if they found me funny lol

50. Something you feel people often misunderstand about you that i’m not nice lol because i keep to myself unless spoken to irl + that unimpressed scowl i always have. it’s like my default facial expression!

not forcing anyone to do it since it’s very long, just tagging for the sake of tagging! and i think most of the people i know have already been tagged? i’ve seen this tagged post done by most of them lol

@ashnable @nimmywik @captiveotomeprincess @otometrashcan  @princessdiarymdc @arimii @madamemalfoy21 @kinkymint @oh-my-otome

[theteamoth]

Massive Ask Meme

I was tagged by @grey-skies-full-moon Rules: Tag 20 people (I don’t know that much people, but I’ll do my best)

Well, here goes something, mates.

Your last:

1. Drink: Coffee with spices, just a couple hours ago.

2. Phone Call: from my friend Liyba.

3. Text message: also from my other friend, Jenya.

4. Song you listened to: Mother Of Flame by Miracle Of Sound ft. Sharm. Randomly appeared on my playlist, but I like Gavin Dunne and the vocals are just... Epic and breathtaking.

5. Time you cried: I... think it happened in June. For personal reasons.

 Have You:

6. Dated someone twice: Nope.

7. Kissed someone and regretted it: Kinda. Maybe. I don’t know anymore.

8. Been cheated on: Technically? Yeah, it happened once.

9. Lost someone special: Yes.

10. Been depressed: I still am! xD But seriously – yeah. I’m slowly getting better, though.

11: Gotten drunk and thrown up: Actually, no, never. Hangover... That’s a whole other (and messy) story.

 List 3 Favorite Colors:

12. Electric blue.

13. Black

14: Grey and grayish colours.

 In the last year, have you…

15. Made new friends: I’ve met new people, so yeah, I hope I can consider them my friends.

16. Fallen out of love: Heh... Yes. Should’ve happened f*cking lot sooner.

17. Laughed until you cried: Once or twice. Also I tend to hiccup and snort. xD

18. Found out someone was talking about you: Nope.

19. Met someone who changed you: ...probably. Don’t know yet.

20. Found out who your friends are: People I can rely on and trust with my life. Even if we literally (and figuratively) drifted apart.

21. Kissed someone on your FB list: Excluding family members – yes, And it made things and a friendship very complicated for a while.

 GENERAL:

22. How many Facebook friends do you know in real life: A small number, maybe 8 or 10 people.

23. Do you have any pets: I had a cat before, but now... I WISH I COULD AFFORD A PET DAMMIT. T_T

24. Do you want to change your name: My last name, yes. I became dissatisfied with it over time.

25. What did you do for your last birthday: I spent it alongside my friends – they organized a great party!

26. What time did you wake up: I often wake up at random times and turning off alarm while asleep is the new norm. Today it was at 6:47.

27. What were you doing at midnight last night: Watching YouTube and talking to a friend via VK.)

28. Name something you can’t wait for: When I can live my own life.

29. When was the last time you saw your Mom: Right now.) She sits on my right.

30. What is one thing you wish you could change in your life: I wish I could regularly see and touch all my friends and loved ones.

31. What are you listening to right now: Game of Thrones  soundtrack. Specifically, “Mhysa”

32. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: My close friend is called Tom. Or Toma.)

33. Something that is getting on your nerves: Family rows, all that shouting and screaming and blaming. Also, myself – sometimes. But mostly I am chill and calm... maybe  too calm. At least I think so. I want to get better. I’m getting there. Slowly, but I do.

34. Most visited website:  YouTube, VK, Tumblr and my frpg forum.

35. Mole/s: I’ve got one on the back my neck and on my forehead. Also one on my back.

36. Mark/s: Several scars – on my neck and face (had an operation), a gunpowder burn right under my knee, several long thin scars on my chest from a knife... Those are the most prominent and fresh. Other scars faded with time, but are still visible if you take a closer look.

37. Childhood dream: A lot of them. Can’t remember all anymore, but I dreamed to be a superhero.

38. Hair color: Light-brown, maybe... blonde?? Don’t know. xD

39. Long or short hair: Short at the moment. Had shoulder-length hair for a long while, but grew tired of ‘em. Besides, this summer was fricking HOT – nearly 40 C.

40. Do you have a crush on someone? ... yes. Wish I didn’t.

41. What do you like about yourself: Uh... I don’t know, actually. But I’m loyal to those I consider friends and family, maybe to a fault. I like to think I’m creative and smart, even

42. Piercings: Nope.) I thought about it but it ain’t my style.

43. Blood type: B +.

44: Nicknames: Novac, Dobric, “that feathered smartass”... xDD

45. Relationship status: single.

46. Zodiac: Leo/Year of the Rooster.

47. Pronouns: He/Him. 

48. Favorite TV show(s): Can’t say I have ONE. But I have a lot of favorites – Marvel series (Daredevil, Jessica Jones, etc.), Fullmetal Alchemist, My Hero Academia, Game of Thrones, Brooklyn 99... Those I do enjoy for multitude of reasons.)

49. Tattoos: Nope. Not yet, anyways. Considering it – permanent mods should have personal weight and meaning; at least, for me they should reflect something.

50. Right or left hand: Right-handed.

51. Surgery: The most serious operation happened in 2014. I had (and still have, but it’s non-malignant) a tumor; bone tissues were slowly growing through my head. Right under my hypophysis, right behind my left eye and near my carotid artery. It wracked me with migraines and flashes of intense pain, occasionally I blacked out from pain and lack of blood supply (it was kinda strangling my carotid artery). So, doctors cut almost everything out by going directly through my face and carotid artery. So, like that. But hey, I’m alive!

52. Hair dyed a different color:  It’s a nice idea, but I can’t decide on a colour.

53. Sports: Swimming and yoga!

54. Vacation: If I could go with all my friends at Crimea, it would be awesome. Unfortunately they all live abroad and getting to Crimea is problematic as f*ck. Also, money is the issue.

55. Shoes: Good sneakers are pretty great, occasionally sandals... But I love my grinders to death – solid, comfortable, practical shoes. Also good in a fight.

56. Eating: YES

57. Drinking: Yep.)

58. I’m about to: post this ask meme and tag people.)

59. Waiting for: Something good to happen.

60. Want: to understand what I want from myself and life. And to get over my inconvenient crush.

61. Get married: definitely not now and not in the next few years. If it happens, it happens. But not soon.

62. Career: video game writer, writer, lawyer, psychologist... Maybe. I am at loss right now. Now I just started working as a copyrighter.

 WHICH IS BETTER:

63. Hugs or kisses: Can I choose both? Both is good! But kisses from someone I love and cherish are the best. And yeah, I also want a hug followed with a smooch. 

64. Lips or eyes: Both!

65. Shorter or taller: Honestly... Being almost 6,5 feet – or 1,97 in metric – makes me higher than most. Can’t say I have a preference, but inevitably my SO’s were significantly shorter than me. Maybe I do have a thing for shorter people.

66. Older or younger: That depends.

67. Nice arms or nice stomach: I... don’t know? Can’t say it matters to me that much.

68. Sensitive or loud: … Again, a bit of both.

69. Hook up or relationship: Relationship. Demisexual here!

70. Troublemaker or hesitant: I’m hesitant for the most part, and easily get stuck in routines, but I can be a troublemaker too. Both are good in their own ways and time. But I love a little chaos and fun, that’s for sure – it is necessary not to stagnate.

 HAVE YOU EVER:

71. Kissed a stranger: Such thing happened.

72. Drank hard liquor: Define HARD. xD The hardest liquor I ever drank was undiluted absinthe, 80%. Delicious!~

73. Lost glasses/contact lenses: I wear glasses since 4, but had never lost them.

74. Turned someone down: Yes.

75. Sex on first date: No. It’s too fast, too much for me.

76. Broken someone’s heart: I think so. Yes. Out of necessity.

77. Had your heart broken: Multiple times.

78. Been arrested: Almost. I can be fast when it’s necessary.)

79. Cried when someone died: I sobbed and screamed.

80. Fallen for a friend: Yes. And THAT is what makes our friendship complicated. She doesn’t need it, I understand it and agree with her – she doesn’t know about my crush. My emotions... Well, they ain’t making things easier. Stupid heart.

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:

81. Yourself: Not exactly. I try to.

82. Miracles: Weird shit happens so yeah! xD I try to keep an open mind and consider myself agnostic.

83. Love at first sight: Hard to say. I don’t think so – there may be strong attraction (which most people confuse with lust), deep understanding and some solid intuitive feelings, but not love. Love is something you understand and gain through work, through understanding, knowing your SO on a much deeper level, both physical and spiritual.

84. Santa Claus: HOW CAN YOU ASK THAT QUESTION THERE ARE CHILDREN ON THIS SITE

85. Kiss on the first date: Maybe. It depends.

 OTHER:

86. Current best friend: Which one?) I’ve known mine for ages and I will kill for them, if needed. They saved my life and mind and I am grateful beyond simple words.

87. Eye color: Blue-grey, but some people say I have a hint of green.

88. Favorite movie: “The Intouchables”. SERIOUSLY GUYS HAVE YOU SEEN IT?! MY HEART. MY HEART.

tagging: @saisai-chan, @breeeliss, @ferisae, @jaeger-of-freiheit, @missdreawrites, @midnightfuckingmayor, @charmer-of-wind, @thehollowkidvg

[birdgirliris]

Mun Interview

1) Are you really ready for 111 questions? Bring it. (ELEVENTY-ONE!!) 2) Where are you taking this test at? Test? This is a TEST? I thought it was an interview. Sitting on the sofa while watching one of my murder mystery shows. 3) Was your last real relationship a mistake? I don’t do the whole dating thing so no. 4) Who did you last say “I love you” to? My mom 5) Do you regret it? Nope ^^ 6) Have you ever been depressed? Yep. 7) Are you a boy or girl? Look like a girl but I identify as agender. 8) Do you have a job? Yep 9) What is your relationship status? Single and absolutely not looking. 10) How do you want to die? Very quickly or in my sleep 11) What did you last eat? A granola bar 12) Played any sports? I used to do Tennis, Swimming, Gymnastics all very briefly as a kid. Took Tae-Kwon-Do and got all the way to high red belt before the dojo went under. T_T I also took horse back riding lessons for a year which was absolutely wonderful. Currently getting really into running and training for 5ks. 13) Do you bite your nails? No. I like them long anyway 14) When was your last physical fight? I don’t do physical fights? 15) Do you have an attitude? I can. I can be an atrocious little sass master XD 16) Do you like someone? I am assuming this is a “do you have a crush on someone” question, which I don’t. 17) What is your real name? Anna 18) What is the background of you computer screen? A picture of a bunch of islands from the sky. I love the contrast of the blue and green. 19) Are you gonna get high later? Don’t do drugs 20) Do you hate anyone at the moment? No. I’ve found that hating people is too exhausting. Why focus on someone who is oblivious to your hate and spend energy on trying to take them down? Best revenge is to just learn to move on and self love and keep those people out of your life. Took me ages to get there though and sometimes it’s hard. 21) Do you miss someone? I miss my grandparents. 22) Twirl or cut your spaghetti? Twirl. 23) Do you tan a lot? Hahah not at all XD I am pale as a vampire and burn just as easily. 24) Have any pets? T_T We just put the last of them down last month. I used to have two wonderful ferrets and a Labrador. 25) How exactly are you feeling?! A little sleepy and kind of worn down. 26) Ever eaten food in a car while someone or yourself is driving? Yes 27) Ever made out in the bathroom? No 28) Would you take any of your exes back? I don’t have any 29) Are you afraid of spiders? Nah. I am actually the designated spider remover/killer of my group of friends and family.  XD 30) Would you go back in time if you were given the chance? I SURE WOULD!! that would be so cool to experience history first hand ^^ 31) Do you regret anything from your past? Nah. 32) What are your plans for this weekend? I have work and THEN I HAVE MY BIRTHDAY I AM GOING TO BE SO OLD HELP ME (I actually won’t be that old but still I was hoping to be more accomplished before I turned almost 30). 33) Do you want to have kids? Hahaha no. Let me be the godperson or the aunt or whatever but I don’t actually want kids. 34) Did you ever kiss someone whose name starts with an M? No? 35) Do you type fast? Usually. 36) Do you have piercings? Nope. 37) Want any more? Noooo. 38) Can you spell well? Hahahhaa, I frequently spell things so wrong I have to google it cause spell check can’t help me XD 39) Do you miss anyone from your past? No actually. I’m grateful for the experiences and things I learned, but I don’t want those people back in my life. 40) What are you craving right now? nothing actually. 41) Ever been to a bonfire party? I have a feeling that if I say yes it will be saying yes to something I have never actually done/been to but my family usually does big bonfires in the fall and we all hang out and sometimes have friends over? 42) Have you ever been to jail? Nope. 43) Have you ever been on a horse? Yes! Many times. I freaking love horses. <3 44) Kissed someone in a pick up truck? Nope. 45) Have you ever broken someone’s heart? No. 46) Have you ever been cheated on? Not applicable 47) Have you made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry? Never had one 48) What time is it currently? 4:30 EST 49) Would you live with someone without marrying them? Sure I mean isn’t that what being a roommate is? 50) What should you be doing? Writing. I have rp replies and a novella to write XD 51) What’s irritating you right now? My mild headache that I can’t quite seem to get rid of. 52) Have you ever liked someone so much that it hurts? Not reeeally? 53) Does somebody love you? Besides family and friends, nope. 54) What is your favorite color? Green, Blue, Black, Purple, Brown 55) Have you ever changed clothes in a vehicle? Yes. But it’s a pain in the butt. 0/10 57) Do you have trust issues? I have some? 58) You are over half way done with this. Are you sure you want to continue? I am not finished until I have answered all eleventy-one questions. No I will not stop making Lord of the Ring references. 59) Do you have any siblings? I do. I have a sister. ^^ 60) Do you have a good relationship with your parents? I have a really strong relationship with my parents. 61) Do you live with anyone? My parents 62) Do you believe your most recent ex thinks about you? Not applicable 63) Who was the last person you cried in front of? My best friend. I just completely broke down and she was like “ok cool beans, I got this” and was super great. 64) Do you give out second chances too easily? Nope. I know my boundaries and if you cross ‘em, you cross ‘em, and I’m out, your loss. 65) Is it easier to forgive or forget? It’s a lot easier to forgive. I frankly think it’s stupid to forgive and forget. Remember, so that you can learn from it, possibly help others, and so that those who wronged you can’t do it again (or as easily at least). 66) Is this year the best year of your life? Absolutely not. It hasn’t been a horrible year by any means though. It’s just had its rough patches. 67) What was your childhood nickname? Anna Banana. 68) Have you ever walked outside completely naked? wh-....why would I ever do that? XD 69) What is your motto in life? Hakuna Matata 70) Do you believe everything happens for a reason? Yeah. 71) What is the last thing you did before you went to bed last night? Brushed my teeth 72) Do you have a best friend? I do. <3 73) What is bothering you? My headache and the fact that word counts do not go up if you don’t actually write the words. The fact that writing can’t happen by osmosis really bugs me. But I think that it bugs most writers XD 74) Have you ever been out of your country? No. T_T 75) Do you play the Wii? I don’t have one. 76) Are you listening to music right now? No. But I am watching a murder mystery show (Death in Paradise). 77) Do you like Chinese food? GIVE ME!! *grabby hands* 78) Do you know your fathers b- day? I do. But I am not sharing that information. 79) Are you afraid of the dark? No. The dark isn’t scary. It’s what’s in it. 80) Is cheating ever okay? No 81) Are you mean? I can be incredibly mean but I try not to be and leave the situation if I know my temper might get the best of me. 82) Can you keep white shoes clean? Hhahaha my childhood has proven this is an impossibility for me. XD 83) What was the last song you listened to? Why Not (Hilary Duff) 84) Do you believe in true love? Yes. 85) What are you currently wearing? Jeans and a t-shirt 86) What do you wear to bed? Usually just a t-shirt. It gets hot at night here during the summer. 87) What is the weather like right now? IT’S SO HOT AND HUMID WHY DO I LIVE IN THE SOUTH??? 88) Do you like the outside? I freaking love the outdoors. <3 89) Are you currently bored? Nah. I’ve got my tv show, I’m good. 90) Do you wanna get married? I’m so happy being single that I have a really hard time picturing myself ever being married. It’s just not something that interests me. 91) Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you baby? No cause I’m not into that. 92) Are you hungry? Nope. 93) Have you ever made out for more than a half hour straight? No. XD 94) What makes you happy? RP-ing, writing, photography, reading, watching murder mysteries/true crime shows 95) Would you change your name? Mayyyybe? But I like it. 96) Ever been to Alaska? No, but I really want to go. 98) Do you watch the news? Sometimes. 99) What’ s your zodiac sign? Cancer 100) Do you like Subway? Subway is one of my favorite sandwich places. 101) Would it be hard to kiss the last person you kissed? Like platonically or romantically? You’ve gotta be more specific here. 102) Your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? 1.This doesn’t really apply  2. I don’t have any male friends (namely because they refuse to respect my wishes/boundaries and I’m not here for that no matter the gender--me saying I don’t want to date you is not your cue to try harder). 103) Do you talk like your friends? Nah. I might borrow certain catch phrases but my style of talking is pretty distinct apparently? 104) What do you plan to do with the rest of your day? Just chill. Write a bit and then maybe watch an anime/read then sleep. 105) Have you ever seen someone you knew & purposely avoided them? Once or twice. If I see someone I’m no longer friends with I’ll avoid them, but won’t go majorly out of my way to do so. In the unfortunate event I do I run into them, I’ll be polite. 106) Do you have a friend of the opposite sex who you can act your complete self around? All of my friends are girls. See number 102. 107) who was the last person of the opposite sex you talked to? My dad. 108) Does it matter if your boyfriend/girlfriend smokes? I can’t be around people who smoke. And I’m not interested in dating. 109) Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with? My dad. 110) Favorite lyrics right now?

I know everybody on this island, seems so happy on this island Everything is by design I know everybody on this island has a role on this island So maybe I can roll with mine I can lead with pride, I can make us strong I'll be satisfied if I play along But the voice inside sings a different song What is wrong with me? ~How Far I’ll Go (Moana)

111) Tag 10 people Everyone has already been taggggged. T_T (but if you haven’t been and want to be let me know and I will 100% tag you)

[miss-zei]

Tagged by: @ventus-rogue thank you~

1) Are you named after someone?

My mom said that she chose my name after reading a book, though she can’t remember what book she had been reading at the time. 

Almost everybody I meed though comments about the city in Egypt hough.

Oh, my name is Alexandria :p

2) When was the last time you cried?

Yesterday

3) Do you like your handwriting?

I think its nice~ easy to read for the most part.

4) What is your favorite lunch meat?

I really like salami~ but I also like turkey

5) Do you have kids?

Nope. Unless we are counting my fur child who is named Apollo, I love him <3

6) If you were a different person would you be friends with yourself?

HA of course! I think that I make a good friend~ is that narcissistic? o - o

7) Do you use sarcasm?

I do! But half the time people can never tell x_x

8) Do you still have tonsils?

Yessir!

9) Would you bungee jump?

If I wasn’t alone, sure! I could never do it by myself though, I’d be too afraid. Its easier to be brave when I have somebody with me.

10) What is your favorite kind of cereal?

Cocoa pebbles

11) Do you untie your shoes before you take them off?

Nope, that takes time!

12) Do you think you’re a strong person?

I’d like to think so! I think I’d be good in a fight if I absolutely HAD to fight, BUT that could just be me thinking that I’m tougher than I really am.

13) What is your favorite ice cream flavor?

Mint chocolate chip is deliciouuuss <3

I DON’T CARE WHAT YOU SAY REANNA!!

14) What is the first thing you notice about people?

What color their eyes are~

15) Red or pink?

Either deep red or pastel pink~ I can’t choose 

16) What is the least physical thing you like about yourself?

I’ve wanted a breast reduction since I was like... 13 soooooo---

Thats if I’m reading the question right? I CAN’T TELL

17) What color pants and shoes are you wearing right now?

Black pants and no shoes~

18) What is the last thing you ate? 

Coffee o u o

19) What are you listening to right now?

omg nothing! Malcolm in the Middle stopped playing!! Thanks for reminding me~

20) If you were a crayon what color would you be?

Cerulean <3

21) Favorite smell?

I LOOVEE the smell of the air when or after it has rained~ its very earthy <3

22) Who is the last person you talked to on the phone?

My father

23) Favorite sport to watch?

Hockey, if I HAD to pick. I don’t really like watching sports.

24) Hair color?

Strawberry blonde/brown? More brown than blonde, but it also takes on a red tone sometimes? idk man

25) Eye color?

Green-blue~

26) Do you wear contacts.

Nah, I’m too afraid of poking my eye to get contacts. I definitely see myself wearing glasses forever.

27) Favorite food to eat?

Chinese! Or Alibi salad <3 I’m going to miss Alibi salad T_T

28) Scary movie or comedy?

Comedy

29) Last movie you saw?

Practical Magic. ITS SUCH A GREAT MOVIE GUYS, I DEFINITELY RECOMMEND!! IT IS ON NETFLIX <3

I love me some witches <3

30) What color shirt are you wearing?

White/cream sweater~

31) Summer or winter?

Winter

32) Hugs or kisses?

Hugs, I could hug foreverrrr

33) What book are you currently reading?

Currently reading the A Court of Thorns and Roses series by Sarah J. Maas~ I haven’t been able to read in a little while because I’ve got so much I need to get done... but its seriously such a great series x_x

34) Who do you miss right now?

Ah, too many people 

35) What is on your mouse pad?

I don’t have one

36) What is the last tv program you watched?

Malcolm in the Middle! Though that is on Netflix... so does it count?

37) What is the best sound?

Rain! Or wind through leaves.... oh my gosh I can’t decide between those two.

38) Rolling Stones or Beatles?

Rolling Stones

39) What’s the furthest you’ve traveled?

From Michigan to Florida

40) Do you have a special talent?

I don’t think so

41) Where were you born?

Michigan

--

I’m sorry if you get tagged more than once! And of course, you don’t need to do this <3

Tagging: @unashamed-shipper @sanguine-fairy @thefairywrites @rayvenoir @summylise