#at least now theres some variety ig

[technicolorxsn]

ah

[t4tcecilos]

"Don't get me started" no we're getting you started, ramble about some music you're really liking at the mo <3

tumblr user loudly--unladylike my beloved .,.. be warned this is rlly long n also just a lot of me going !!!!!! link to the album here

big tw for like. deep topics like death n panicking n such also this is such a long post im so sorry

ok :D background knowledge about the band n the album im gonna b talking about:

miracle musical itself was like... a music project started by one of the tally hall members !! it involves alot of other music artists too !!! they made an album n a single song!! both of those released in 2012 :]

the album is called Hawaii: Part II. there's not a part one and the band has even said theyr not making a part one.!! so that kinda sets the vibe ig. the songs don't have much correlation from first glance, even after taking a closer look they don't tell a story or anything that much !!! the thing the have in common is a mystical, often spooky, feeling (at least 2 me.) most of them have a nautical, sealife theme.

first note!!! both the first and last songs of the album start with the lyrics "alone at the edge of a universe, humming a tune-" which is like!!! continuity my beloved :]] it's also just a good lyric yknow

the first song is called Introduction to the Snow !! kinda a play on words of introduction to the show :]] it doesn't hav many lyrics but it sets the tone for the rest of the album!!! which is like... vaguely mysterious and dealing with the universe n how ppl feel kinda!

ok here's where i mention how the songs like. flow together!!! theres a variety, from the songs merging together with the same rhythms n such or a very sudden change !!!! its rlly cool n i like how there's both :)))

the second song is called Isle Unto Thyself! some of the first bits of this song rlly just ...,,., sets the vibe for the rest of the album!! the lyrics "know what cant be shown, feel what cant be known" is very releant as alot of the songs r abou tfeeling things n knowing things!! even if u cant see them !!! also banger ending transistion to the next song, tehres a buildup that transitions nicely !!!

the third song is Black Rainbows :D this ones one of my favorites!! there r two languages being sung in this one, hawaiian and english. both are singing about rainbows, which represents their love for eachother in the way of the colors and the feelings!! :D

- ok im realizing i forgot to talk about the uhhh album cover!!! it is in mostly greyscale, except for the rainbow text of the band name under the album name!!! it is an ocean with a full mon above, with overlaying images of palm trees, stairs, and a fish/monster with alot of teeth!!!! there is also what appears to be a whale or maybe plane in the backgrounf, sumberged inthe water!! to me it rll y just summarizes the mystery n like. wackyness of the album :DD

ok um back 2 the songs !!!! the forth song is called White Ball!! it tackles dealing with death in like... terms of a dance!! like a ballroom dance, at a ball! the most repeated lyric is "such impossible bliss" which. yeah. death yknow,,,.. it shows the beuaty of whatever the afterlife is. it also makes comparisons to space!!!

the fith song is called Murders! which to me feels like,, runnning away and the fear that causes? or someone gettin lost in a forest!! definetly feels like.. fear. espeacially the lines "tree falling no one would hear, shadow of nobody there" like. dude thats FEAR n yknow what i get it!!! forests can b fucking scary dude.

the sixth song is 宇宙ステーションのレベル7, which roughly translates to Space Station Level 7! this song is mostly japanese n french, neither of which i speak! so uh.,,., yeha!! bu t i do fukcign love the intruments-

oh ym gosh i forgot to talk abou tthe bacground intruments and music!!!!!!! its so good!! each song has its own little flairs and they all r just... wonderfulyl composed!!!!

now,,, the seventh song is The Mind Electric,.,. (tw for just like. idk dude its super grim the guy gets electrocuted) this one is like.. rlly haunting but its super good!! so the first half of the song is all in reverse, which sets up this like.. rlly eerie tone for the song. bc. u dont know whats going on at first! bc its all reveresd n u know the like... idk its creepy hearing ppl talking/singing backwards. from the halfway point, the song isnt in reverse any longer. dude,,, like the lyrics themselves? ouchies.... basically this guy goes to court for... somethin its not told- but uh basicallly he gets sent to an infirmary and ends up gettinf electrocuted bc his minds not in a good place. its super grim n honestly just... man,,,,,, i could explain more on this but itd probably b better as its own post tbh !!!

,,,the eighth song is Labyrinth! this one seems to b mostly about someone whos in this big.. personal struggle with love + relationships n feels trapped inhis own mind, hence the labyrinth.

the ninth song is Time Machine !! this ones pretty straightforward i think!!! kinda. this person feels like the wasted thier past and is sad and regretful. so they use a time machine!!! it feels like they are living the dream, right? but its lonely!! they begin to regret it. they realize they shouldnt waste their present.

the tenth song is Stranded Lullaby! lots of boat references n terminology here, the singer is looking for someone who they once lost, but cant seem to find them in the vast oceans of existence.

the eleventh and final song is called Dream Suite in Sea Major!!! this ones also one of my favorites !!!! this one rlly just wraps up the album. it tells the story of a sailor who gets lured in by sirens. it ends with a subtle nod to the album not being super easy to find with the lyrics "invisible to some until its time."

OK i probably did this way too much uhhh woo post finished im tired!!!!! i will explain more into some of these if ppl r interested :]]

[beizhuo]

alright folks , i made this post last night about amending my carrd rules . & now , after calming somewhat down from getting sick to my stomach about it , i must now make one final update post about this to make people really & fully understand where i stand . why ? because i am , once again , having / needing to finely comb through the people i want to follow & interact with due to some very , VERY toxic behavior & terrible , childish individuals that think its real cute to stalk , harrass , steal , & gatekeep folks . 

understand that i will NOT be namedropping anybody in this post . this is not my intention . i am not out here to isolate folks or make people ‘ chose sides ’ . making people do that is absolutely horrible ! i do not give a damn who other people interact with . i do , however have extreme issues with theft ( amongst other things ) . i can draw a god damn line at theft ! 

harassment ? don’t care . you’re trolling , i can ignore you . gatekeeping . you’e petty and attention seeking im here for friends anyway . but actual literal theft - i can draw a line there . please get out & OFF MY BLOG if you are so unoriginal that you haveta steal from me or my friends !

please know that you can interact with those thieves & gatekeepers , i don’t care ! but understand that i will most likely softblock you because i genuinely do not want them to find me . no hard feelings . ( they have found my other 2 blogs , and i am tired of them finding me ! especially for baizhu ! i don’t even follow some of my friends here cause of this ! ) i am not even in the genshin community to begin with . my group ? we don’t do communities for toxic behavior and people being so exclusive to the point of driving people out & away . its distasteful and mean ! do you know that i have some friends that were cut off from communities entirely all because they were a dupe ? tHAT is the kind of dupe drama i fucking hate . along with theft . anyway . i will start from the beginning of my rules that i deem important .

DUPLICATES . ( AND MIMICRY / THEFT )

the irony that this is the first point . it is like it was a wonderful transition . anyway . this is actually having to deal with two rule points . and i want to group them together cause they are related .

myself & a few other people have come to find out that .... there is somebody AT THE VERY LEAST taking inspo from us . i will start with dupes .

my friend has a character and was WHOLLY mistaken for another mun . which is fine . that happens , but things took a turn for the worse when they were then shunned / cut off because they werent ‘ good enough ’ . do you know how HORRIBLE that is ? to be told that you aren’t good because you weren’t the mun that they wanted ? this is the type of shit i cannot stand with dupe drama . DO NOT EVER COMPARE DUPES WITH ONE ANOTHER !!! i mean it . 

i follow different childes ! and you know what i adore them both . they are both amazing ! 

sure i may have my mains / exclusives ( and im not inclined to interact with other blogs of that same character ) but i still like portrayals . i do , in fact , just READ threads sometimes . i don’t necessarily follow for interactions . like ffs man . i like variety . jesus christ .

going to mimicry / theft . you know ... i have fucking seen this with a couple of friends . there is a difference between coincidental similarities , however ! for myself & for my friends , we have SEEN inspo taken from us . im gonna say this really loud for people .

MIMICRY IS NOT FUCKING FLATTERY . 

do not take inspo from me . especially without credit . absolutely do NOT do it . you are very unoriginal for doing that shit . 

now , you like something i make / made ? you are inspired to want to make something ? fine , that’s okay , you can ALSO fucking ask me , you can also credit me . as you fucking should ! you can notify me and go , damn , i really like your style , do you mind if i use it in xyz ? sure , go right ahead . do it . im begging you , go ahead and do it IF YOU FUCKING ASK ME . god im so fucking angry about this , but this is some vile shit . and im angry .

i am angry and terrified cause i literally cannot get away from these people cause they seem to be wherever i go . i DO NOT DO COMMUNITIES BECAUSE OF THIS .

as a good friend said : it’s like they are a virus that you cannot get rid of .

thats what happens with attention seekers unfortunately , but for the sake of my safety & health , i will not have it on my blog or dash . if i see these people on my dash often , i will unfollow .

and it isn’t like a specific person , its a GROUP of people . which leads me to my next point .

DRAMA / CALLOUTS.

imagine having beef with an individual , and then going around and gatekeeping that individual and getting people to unfollow / block them . im not talking about , ‘ hey this person is vile because they ship incest ’ . i am talking about ‘ i had a disagreement with this person & they hurt my feelings >:/ they are mean and will hurt you . etc etc etc . ’ 

i do not give a flying fuck about somebodies issues with another person . so you guys don’t get along . not my problem . i have people that hate me . i have friends where i hate their friends . shit happens . i am probably absolute scum to some people lol . i get mistaken for other people sometimes . it’s fine , hate me cause you think im that person . that person is snowflake repellent anyway , go choke on your kool aide that you are drinking ig . 

okay sorry i am angry but still . people claim and cry about wanting to talk & communicate . but then . guess what . sometimes shitty people are like , so this person said this to me , and they are mean . IF YOU ARE THE PERSON THAT GOES ‘ OH MY GOD HOW DARE THEY ’ AND BLOCK THEM THEN YOU ARE THE PROBLEM . i will give an example . of using my two names that i have .

somebody goes to amphy and says ‘omg ghost said this , and im frustrated and angry with them cause what he said was uncalled for . ’ if amphy goes ‘ omg ghost is shitty ’ and then unfollows / blocks them without any other discussion , then thats an issue cause ghost has no idea wtf happen . amphy got involved in YOUR relationship with ghost even though ghost has been nothing but kind and sweet to you . you also don’t know if amphy is just victimising or being emotional either . so why they fuck would you believe somebody who is venting to you about it and then block somebody who did literally NOTHING to you .

i dont know if i explained that correctly but i will give you something more realistic , again without namedropping .

i have a few friends that hate one another . i’ve known all of them for years . but they all , i kid you not , they ALL fucking hate each other . there’s three of them . and they cannot stand each other . i just happen to be somebody who gets along with all of them . you bet your ass that at one point , they all came to talk mad shit about the others . what did i do ? i went , oh okay . well im sorry that you have issues with them . sounds like a bad experience , but i can’t do anything about that cause i am not you and i am not them . if you are gonna change my mind , it isn’t gonna happen , sorry !

i have had people shit talk people i have no idea who they are , and i just sit here just being a source for them to vent , but i never NEVER EVER act on anything i hear . why ? cause its petty drama and gossip . if you do that , then damn , sorry kiddo , get some help on that alright ? maybe be nicer . i dunno .

now . racism ? pedophilia ? incest ? HARMFUL SHIT ? that’s different . but again , theres a lot of miscommunication . i have people coming and pulling the cards like they are hot shit  and that isn’t fucking cute . THAT ISN’T CUTE GUYS . you are the problem if you try to victimize yourself cause of something YOU misinterpreted .

i have a friend that has this on their blog .

i am literally going off on a god damn tangent . anyway . :) 

fuck you if drink kool aide .

THERE ARE OTHER MENTAL DISORDERS! YOU ARE ABLEIST IS YOU ERASE THE OTHER (UN)COMMON ONES.

i know that autism is the ‘common’ one here . you are valid okay . but guess what . ADHD , BPD, DiD, and straight up depression and anxiety are also things as well ! there are MANY folks here that are also undiagnosed as well OR they lay on some sort of spectrum as well . I am once again not going to disclose my own things here cause again THAT IS PRIVATE INFO , but fuck you if you refuse to see other disabilities .

also there are physical disabilities as well btw .

if you are not understanding of any other disability , or you wanna mute / deafen other mental disorders , YOU ARE THE FUCKING PROBLEM .

end of story . 

treat other people how you want them to treat you and don’t you dare ever shove your baggage at them . thanks . 

please be more understanding that some people are not okay:tm: . 

i implore you to get help if you need help , but sometimes some people dont have to take your shit . and they most certainly do not need to sit and take your issues if they are not okay either . its toxic and very unhealthy behavior to expect others to help you . they can help you as best as they can , but you need to understand that everybody has their moments . do not guilttrip them . do not gaslight them . 

but also understand that sometimes , people are saying things cause they genuinely need help ! you can be there for them but as a friend , you need to also tell them your own boundaries as well and tell them that they need to seek professional help .

but also , if somebody refuses to get help , then that is on them . not on you . 

anyway another tangent , but back to the point . autism , while you need to understand is something you need to see and understand , is not the only mental disorder ! and you need to understand that some people suffer from really REALLY shitty things and are sometimes undiagnosed . i am really REALLY tired of depression , ADHD , BPD, and DiD getting brushed under the rug like they are not important . cause guess what , there are spectrums ! all mental health is important . fuck you if you disregard the other disorders , you are being ableist .

STOP HATE READING PEOPLE.

im really sick and tired of this . you don’t like something somebody said ? you can either : ask what they meant or block / unfollow them . 

DO NOT FUCKING STALK THEM EITHER . 

you have an obsession if you hover on their blog too .. do not do that . that is SO unhealthy for you . here is what a friend said on twitter . ( not name dropping them , just copy pasting them )

❛ i stg people need to fine a better hobby than to hate read a persons blog or profile. not a good look on you when you go and read what they post about just to get angry at something you think they said and then you go off spewing lies about it cause 'youre offended.'  

like you already hate them in the first place. you weren’t 'looking to see if they were a better person.' youre just looking to find another thing to hate about them. 

that is what hate reading is about. so you can read their posts and find just another reason to hate and laugh at how bad you think they are.

but it doesnt make you a better person. it just makes you a sad person with no life. stop hate reading people. grow tf up. go breathe on some plants or something idk.

i say this very loud and clear . if you hate read me , i live in your head rent free . not my problem . but it does become my problem if you begin to steal shit and start spewing lies about myself or my friends . grow up and move on with your life . sorry my life seems more interesting than you ig . idk .

anway this got long , and at this point i am going off on a tangent but !!!!

TL ; DR

read my rules ig . idk .

you can dm me for more info if you want . at this point i have blocked the problem blogs for myself. if you are curious you can ask . HOWEVER. i am not going to tell you to block or unfollow . why ? cause at the end of the day , it is MY beef . this are my issues . i am NOT here to gatekeep .

i will say that i will tell you IN private the for MY story . but keep in mind that it is MY story . not yours . not theirs . it is all about perception .

my perception is that they are scummy gatekeeping thieves . they gatekeep the people they dont like or are intimidated by . i am somebody who fucking bites and calls people out on their shit , because of this ? i make enemies . but my enemies are not yours . i dont care .  dont give a damn . i am intimidating to people who are cowards and i don’t care . 

if they feel bad when i call them out , if they try to go around and do damage control , then that means they are guilty .

and then you can ask yourself this : why are they reacting like that ?

i am once again going to bring up that other twitter user that i quoted before .

❛  you dont like hearing that because someone is holding a mirror up to you and it makes you uncomfortable because you know you . and you know the parts of you that are good . so in your heart you have to come up with a narrative that makes you feel better about the fact that somebody is asking your to confront the parts about yourself that you hate the most .

anyway . this got long . im so sorry for the long read . im so sorry i sounded hostile ad angry . im just volatile sometimes . im just really tired . and i dont need to come on this blog and have a panic attack . 

anyway . cheers loves ! stay happy , stay healthy . drink your fluids . take your meds !

[rouge-the-bat]

whadda fuck ur my age, for some reason ur wisdom on queer stuff made me think ur middle 20s ahksjdnfs ur takes feel so matured! ig i should take this as a sign to work on my critical thinking (⊙ᗜ⊙)

omg hehe! i feel like i usually get ppl online thinking im younger, i guess bc of the way i talk sometimes or somethin? i always found it funny bc i feel younger than i am too lol. mostly bc Mental Illness be making me not perceive time-

also everyone has different rates of progression for stuff! if u feel like your behind me on maturity for some things thats not necesarily a bad thing- but also working on critical thinking skills is always a good thing, and to keep continuing to do through life! good to keep that skill from getting rusty, at any time.

i think for me, ive grown up always in a "fully proud in my weirdness" sort of way- when i was a kid and my brothers said i was weird id be like yep! weird is great! and before i started going as rouge online, my nickname was weirdo! (which i still like as a nickname!) and so when i see new things that tend to make other people reactionally raise an eyebrow at and make fun of, i just get curious like, oh! this is different, i wonder what this is about. it helps me keep an open mind, bc im always curious about things even if it seems strange at first, and i want to learn about stuff before taking any sort of stances on it. so it just comes a lot down to willingness and Want to understand new things, instead of sticking to a first-instinct judgement.

this applies to a lot of stuff, but it defintely boosts being really open and inclusionist about queer identities! the variety of experiences ppl can have fascinates me, so i like to hear about them and broaden my horizons. so whenever i started hearing about a lot of less common labels i just wanted to learn about them! i love the variety of labels out there and different ways they can be used, it reflects the complexities of us as humans ! its the natural way of how language works, since we make all of it up ourselves!

anyways yeah, i think some general key points for critical thinking are

1. is my stance reactionary? can i really even make sense of it to myself? (id say can i explain it to others, but i have issues of doing that myself in general sometimes, even if i fully 100% understand and have a firm stance on something- at least for talking out loud i have issues usually. my brain is just a mess inside lol)

2. do i even really understand what this thing is? do i even really understand what the side im against is saying? looking into as many aspects of it as you can is the best way to get an informed opinion, that means seeing what opposing sides say, even. and try to do your own research instead of just taking what others say at face value.

3. am i reaching a good medium for listening to what others have to say, but not blindly following others views? this one can be pretty tough, bc theres a lot of stuff that can pressure people to agree "or youre a shit person." i think its best combated by staying away from people who are very black and white with their stances, and especially with how they view people, people that tend to attack others for even asking questions, and generally stay away from echo chambers. having friendly relations with people who have different views than you but are really chill about it can be good to have around- which can be hard to find Tbh especially in certain topics, but theyre out there!

4. always keep yourself open to possibly being wrong, bc theres so much information out there in the world, so sometimes youre gonna come across something that will completely change your entire view on a topic. its pretty much guaranteed to happen many times in life! its good to let your stances change as you learn more, and accept that old views of yours were maybe Not Great- but that just means your becoming a better person now!

so basically check for reactionary bias, research, listen to different views (but dont blindly follow), and keep an open mind- probably some other good things to note for good critical thinking but this is whats coming to mind for me atm! i hope all of it made sense lol