#at least it would be a hint about how much of the book they adapted

[mzannthropy]

The status of The upcoming The Count of Monte Cristo series (the one with Sam Claflin) has now been changed to post-production on IMDb. Still no full cast list though; lately they've added an actor for Maximilian Morrel (Robin Greer). Still nothing for Albert, Franz, Valentine, Bertuccio, Benedetto, Caderousse, Debray or Beauchamp.

[mashkdemss]

To me, people saying Mike LOVED El is like people saying Ennis LOVED Alma (Brokeback Mountain). It feels like people are just going with their first impressions of the characters and not wanting to learn more.

Seriously, I've seen people recently saying Ennis is bisexual when I'm pretty sure he's just gay with internalized homophobia due to childhood trauma and the attitudes of 50's–60's society. I don't want to say anything against bisexuals or people who believe Mike is bi, but if Mike and Ennis are bi, I think that would be pretty bad representation. In Mike's case, they could have at least given the viewer some hint that he is attracted to girls as much as his friends, when he is just written as a boy obsessed with his relationship with his first girlfriend, who is incredibly similar to his best friend, and he himself does not even want to think about the problems in their relationship because he only cares about how it looks from the outside.

Another example that recently came to my mind: people who say that Mike LOVED El, to me is the same as people who say that Jo LOVED Laurie (Little Women). Usually, this is said by those who have not read the books and only watched the 2019 adaptation. Although in any case, it is obvious that Jo did not love Laurie from the very beginning to the very end. Yes, she LIKED him, but she did not LOVE him. In Jo's case, she was just lonely and she WANTED TO LOVE SOMEONE. In Laurie, he mistook his first crush for true love, but eventually found someone he REALLY loved. Maybe I am wrong in some ways, or I am exaggerating, but it makes me a little sad that people do not want to delve into these characters and prefer to see what they want to see.

[confirmeddead]

Lover, Will You Look At Me Now?: An Armand & Daniel Theory

Armand and Daniel were in a relationship in the book The Queen of the Damned and have been a fan favorite for decades. Many fans were excited to see how the show would adapt this companionship.

Armand makes several appearances throughout season 1 in disguise as the servant Rashid. He reveals his true identity in the season 1 finale.

A lot has been said on how the show will approach their companionship. It’s definitely up in the air with so many things having been changed regarding the two already!

Have we seen anything that has definitively hinted at them forming a companionship? I could talk about faulty memories, a possible purple shirt, or vermouth in Daniel’s cocktails; but is any of that concrete proof?

Let’s look at the unsaid- literally. The looks and stares between Armand and Daniel.

Throughout season 1, Daniel’s attention is consistently on Louis’s servant Rashid (Armand in disguise). We see the camera (Daniel’s eye) follow him constantly. Daniel is an investigative journalist but he’s taken a keen interest into the person serving his drinks.

Daniel does a lot of looking at Rashid. We know it’s his job to investigate, so it makes sense he analyzes everything and everyone. But often times he’s distracted by Rashid’s presence, even prior to having the San Francisco dream. Daniel looks at Armand so much throughout the show, but has anyone noticed how intimate some of these moments are?

Thank you to @mirrorhouse for the Magnolia screencap!

Rashid prayer, which is interrupted by Daniel.

Louis feeding on Rashid in front of Daniel. Staring at one another (and the act itself) is very… personal? Uncomfortable?

Look at the framing of the scene by the magnolia tree. It’s intimate, beautiful, and dare I say romantic!

Most times they’re alone, it feels like the viewer is almost intruding on something (or like Daniel is). Should he be talking to Rashid while he prays? Should he stare at him being fed on? Dare they speak alone while Louis is resting?

I realize they have to look at each other during an interview, but we can see these looks are there for a reason. I think they’re trying to tell us something.

It’s easy for us to look at these things, point, and say FLIRTING! But shipping stuff aside, real people in my life (who don’t read the books or follow socials) who have seen the show have talked to me about the flirting they’re seemingly doing.

Okay, let’s see what Eric Bogosian says regarding the looks:

“I’m looking at him. I’m trying to figure something out and they can show us that and they do show us that. And we do a lot of looking at each other. Like, I do a lot of listening to Jacob, but we do a lot of looking- checking out each other as this relationship continues to go through quite a lot of changes in the next-in all the episodes.”

(Source) 2:00 mark

Wait… checking out? Like checking someone out? What an interesting choice of words.

This is where my theory comes into play.

We all know Eric’s tendency to spoil things about the show, right?

I think that term, which is mostly exclusive to someone interested sexually/romantically, was in the script!

Making a note here to say only the Pilot and the season 2 finale scripts have been released.

Remember the photos I included of the constant moments of Daniel and Armand exchanging looks and eyes tracking each other?

What’s the likelihood it was written in the script (or at the very least directed by the episode directors and Rolin)?

Wait- there’s a quote on that as well!

(Source)

So it was happening in both seasons.

We’ve got our scene moments and the quotes from Eric and Assad. Was “checking out” literally Rolin’s or the scripts words? Was that what he was telling them even back in season 1?

Spoiler Eric strikes again.

I’ll end this off by saying this is all just for fun! We’re all having to wait through this hiatus together so I figured I’d keep up the discussions on my faves. In no way do I think this theory should or is correct- I’m just yapping and love discussing these characters! I’m totally OK being wrong 😅 but it’s all in good fun.

And my asks are open!

Sources otherwise not mentioned:

Title from “I Walked” by Sufjan Stevens

Screencaps take from here (x)

[nalyra-dreaming]

Hi Nalyra, this was not my ask but thank you for the detailed analysis either way I enjoyed it very much!

I agree with a lot of what you said! Personally I am not sure about the possible revisions or theories but they are planning some arcs for sure and their manner of execution remains to be seen. Some changes work for television purposes, others...not so much. However for me, one thing that will put me off the show for good, and I don't know if anyone else shares this opinion, is what you briefly mentioned in your post about the trial setup. After everything in season 1, having Lestat in any way want Louis and Claudia to suffer what they suffered in the hands of the coven is crossing a line I never even imagined we would have to draw in the first place. The racial implications alone...it's just too nasty. I honestly can't understand how the creators themselves cannot see what they are doing.

After s02 I sometimes get the impression that they dont differentiate between characters, to them Armand, Lestat, Louis hell even Santiago are the same in terms of nastiness because they're all vampires and that makes them all equal somehow. For me in order to have a successful adaptation of Anne Rices VC universe they at least have to make the protagonist (Lestat) likeable enough to want the audience to follow him for many seasons. How that went over their heads really confuses me and I guess only season 3 can tell and then we'll have our answer? 😅 hopes and prayers for all of us lestat fans out there !

Glad you liked!

The thing is, I said this before, but it bears repeating - season 3 will be make or break for what they are trying to do I think.

It will show if they can, indeed, pull it off - they might! I DO hope they do, because, this is it - this is what we'll get. I waited 30 years for this. I WILL enjoy it. And, thanks to Sam to a large extent, there's "enough" of the book Lestat in the show one to... see him. If that makes sense.

As per the trial...

I don't think Lestat wanted them to suffer.

But I DO think that in this older, more jaded, and as said maybe also bewildered Lestat that he had a bit of a grim... "see that's what you get for not listening to me" - attitude coming to Paris (and the show had Louis spell out that he was aware and dismissed Lestat trying to keep them safe(!) in 2x02).

Lestat did, quite obviously come to save them, just as in the books.

But, just as in the books, he was also quite focused on Louis.

I want to add here that both the script Anne wrote for the movie, as well as the script that ultimately made it on screen have these scenes!

They did not make it into the movie, but I think it is important to know the two versions, because I think the show plays with them - and with them both at that (Rolin has stated that he looked at all the materials, including Tulane).

This is from Anne's script, the 1992 version:

And THIS is from the actual movie script by Neil Jordan, 1993:

Notice the subtle, but important differences:

Anne's script is of course very close to the books, has Lestat befuddled, in and out of consciousness, there in an effort stemming from... love.

Neil's script actually has Lestat voice that Claudia is to blame. Lestat also clarifies, albeit also quite befuddled, that he's ultimately there for healing... and for Louis.

The show has been doing a mixture of this.

Supposedly revenge, instances of clear befuddlement and obvious signs that Lestat is not alright, dressed to the nines, presented as a witness, while the judgement had long been passed.

I'm not sure what final version they'll land on when Lestat has had his say in season 3 will be. But what we have seen so far, as hard as it may be to accept - has been established already... even if it had been cut out of the theatre version of the movie.

Interestingly enough though, Neil's script also has that hint, that Lestat has to tell Louis something about "that night"... and I always found this extremely interesting. But that just as a note.

I do think you are hitting the nail on the head though that to Rolin and Hannah they're simply... vampires. And killers. More or less all the same.

When it's a major point of the VC actually, that they are not "just" that.

[theside-b]

Spoilers for the novel (and my review for the Live Action) ahead :

The boys do get together, but that act ends with their break up when people find out that Tian and Wang are romantically involved, unlike in Unknown where everyone was ok with Qian and Yuan getting together in A Certain Someone the fact that they are 'brothers' plays a huge role at that stage of their relationship and the eventual demise of their first attempt at a romance. Their break up lasts 6/7 years, don't remember exactly, but its a long time...

A lot more happens, but the show made some fundamental changes to both characters. It takes A LONG time for Tian to come to terms with his own feelings, that scene where he sees his father with another man in bed tints his whole worldview from a very young age — he develops quite the internalized homophobia; he is fine with other's queerness but it's his own that he cannot accept since he sees his father sexual orientation as the reason for the destruction of his family.

There is a tense moment between Tian and his father, where his dad says "we are more alike than you care to admit" hinting that he knows of what its happening between the boys and mind you Tian is still trying to sort out what he feels for Wang. The show sugarcoats quite a lot, novel's Tian would never initiate a kiss with Wang or even play along like he did in the show, at least not at that stage of their relationship.

Speaking of which, Wang is also different in the books. In the show he reads as pretty open minded, curious about anything and everything. In the novel he's pretty straight (at first), the journey really begins as a bromance until the feelings start to change. There is a lot of push and shove between the two of them, and is veeery slow.

The show pretty much burns bright the part where Wang tears Tian's emotional walls. Which I don't mind, otherwise it would take 50 episodes to wrap the first act. I honestly thought they were going to draw an original route for the show, but they are slowly adapting elements they left behind so they can follow the book.

Now for the review:

All in all, I think the show did a good job all things considered: production began in mainland China where Liu Dong was cast, but censorship hinders lgbtqia+ productions there so pre-production moved to Taiwan and there the rest of the casting was done. It's hard to tell how much of that interfered in the script but I assume Tian's father core plot was removed in the first draft and got re-integrated once production moved to Taiwan (Chris Lee's casting was one of the last to be announced which probably means he was also one of the last to join filming). Considering that productions like The Spirealm got pulled for much less is understandable that they would avoid the more thorny subjects under China's homophobic gaze.

(Educated guess here: considering all the publicity push, I imagine either Andy Cheng or Stan Huang were the choices for Wang, but since Liu's casting was an order from one of the financial backers they got smaller roles — it's a common move in taiwanese productions — by the way, there is a 'love triangle' later, is a sad thing since there is no-way you can split the main couple, but the show made me wonder who is going to be playing the third party in the live action).

As I always say about taiwanese shows: you have to watch the live play. The On1y One is much like it's local peers, it works wonders in small doses, but as soon as you see the whole picture you start to see the cracks. It reminded me a lot of Kiseki: Dear to Me in the sense that the main couple story is the emotional backbone, with a somber approach with brief moments of humor but everything surrounding it is slightly unhinged.

Everything that happened at that school was insane. The amount of crimes committed in the school grounds was ridiculous, the fact that Qi Jia Hao didn't ended up behind bars after ordering thugs to attack Wang and assault the english teacher is crazy. The whole side-plot involving the teachers was head-scraching by the way, much like everyone else I assumed that Zhao Xi and Benny were married when they were introduced.

Imagine my surprise finding out that not only they were not married but at one point Zhao Xi thought Benny could be interested in the english teacher (speaking of her, why the hell did she sounded dubbed? Is that not her real voice?). This whole story felt so disjointed from everything else, and it came at the tail end of the season(?), so not only it took some much suspension of disbelief for me to buy that these 40-year old gays were that emotionally impaired but also demanded patience since they spent very valuable screen time which could've benefited the main couple.

That is all to say that while I was having a blast while watching, the more I stop and think about it critically the more problems I see in this show. And again, that usually happens with taiwanese productions, experienced the same with Kiseki and Unknown, two shows that I adore, flaws and all, and now the same happens with The On1y One.

[aninventoryofthepossible]

Inspirations for VOID 1680 AM

Earlier this year, I released a new solo TTRPG: VOID 1680 AM. In it, you use a deck of cards, a six-sided die, your music collection and a voice recorder to create your own late-night radio show.

The cards help you dig deep into your collection to reconnect with music you love; they and the die also help you create anonymous Callers and the concerns, hopes and obsessions that drove them to reach out to you, a fellow lone voice in the darkness.

I also included steps for joining the library of Callers for other players to use, and even to submit your full show for broadcast on the "real" VOID 1680 AM. You can see some of those Affiliate broadcasts here. They're genuinely very cool.

You can check out the game here, and I'm proud to say VOID 1680 AM is now a Judges' Spotlight Winner in this year's ENNIES.

Okay, enough table-setting. Let's get into it.

VOID was the culmination of a lifelong obsession with commercial radio; both the technology (which feels retro despite scarcely being over a century old) and the melancholy romance of lonesome voices baring themselves to an audience they'll never know the scope of.

This, to me, is an apt metaphor for the act of making something - anything at all. Speak into the Void, the back cover copy says. You never know who is listening. So it is with putting something you love into the world.

So what inspired VOID? I cite both Anamnesis by Sam Leigh and The Wretched by Chris Bissette in the book itself, two solo RPGs whose tones and methods did much to help me find my own.

But if I'm being truthful, VOID's inspirations mostly reside outside of games. Here are a few things that haunted me profoundly enough to drive me to respond.

The first is Talk Radio, specifically Oliver Stone's adaptation of Eric Bogosian's play. The movie's tagline is "the last neighborhood in America," which to me frames radio's persistent relevance and puts social media - often called a "town square" itself - in proper context as one piece of the many ways people find connection with others, for better or worse.

Contra the VOID DJ, Barry in Talk Radio is very, very aware of how his audience receives him (hint: not well). Barry must be heard, and so must the similarly damaged souls who call in to dump the poison in their brain into his... and everyone who's listening in, besides. It's a host of people who want to connect but don't know how, spiraling in decaying orbit around each other until something awful happens.

VOID 1680 AM was originally much darker before I decided to pull back and let players pick their own tone, and Talk Radio is why.

Oxenfree is a narrative video game about a small group of teens stuck on an island haunted by hungry ghosts who can be tuned in and out of reality with handheld radios. There's more to it than that, but I'll leave you to discover what on your own - because I would recommend this game to just about anyone.

Insofar as VOID 1680 AM can have a "soundtrack," it is this one by scntfc, created using WWII-era radio equipment.

The Vast of Night is a quietly alarming lo-fi/sci-fi set in a small town in New Mexico in the late '50s. A radio DJ and a switchboard operator pick up strange signals, and then... things happen.

This specific radio station (stylized in the poster above) is what I picture for "my" VOID 1680 AM.

Then there's Stevie in The Fog, played by Adrienne Barbeau. She's the bridge between VOID 1680 AM and my earlier solo game, Lighthouse at the End of the World.

She is, yes: a late night DJ. And her radio station is, yes: in a lighthouse. She's living my dream, at least until the ghost pirates show up.

Spoilers, I guess?

But the most important influence? VOID 1680 AM cover artist Jordan Witt's fan art for the podcast King Falls AM years ago. This image took up residence in my head, so much so that I still use it as phone wallpaper despite never having listened to the show it's for.

When it came time to partner with a cover artist, who that cover artist would be was never in question. Entirely unknowingly, Jordan took all these loose ideas in my head and gave them something to cohere to. A beacon, if you will.

They spoke something into the Void, and I listened.

Fun fact: Jordan even jazzed up the original logo I made for VOID 1680 AM when that title only applied to the AM transmitter in my garage. Here's my original - you can plainly see the influence of Jordan's art on that O. It all really came full circle.

Those are the biggest ingredients in the stew that made VOID 1680 AM. It's fun to talk about stuff I like, but also I hope it might nudge someone - anyone - to get going on something they're after.

(That's you. I'm talking about you.)

A project finding its voice is a wonderful thing, but there's no real miracle to it, no outside influence that will tell you what to do. It's just things in your head magnetizing to each other until they got a shape that - with coaxing - can stand on its own.

See you on the dial.

[yourlocalravendork]

Rule 8~ Get a kick ass partner

AN: Hey y'all, I'm still alive. I'm going through that awkward phase of writing, writers block, hence why I haven't posted a fic in months. So here's a fic to apologise for going MIA for a little while. It's a Zombie land AU since Zombie land is one of my comfort films however you don't need to have seen the film to understand it. And hey, who knows, this might spark that creative phase back and maybe even turn into a series. CW: Zombies, guns, early seasons Spencer my beloved, descriptions of decaying and mutilated flesh, injury detail

Spencer Reid had rules. He had many rules, so obscure and pointless that one may think that he had OCD. He had to wash his hands after touching someone otherwise he was going to die of some horrible disease, he had to have his lucky book in his bag or the whole day would be thrown off, small things like that. Only, when the apocalypse happened, his rules weren't so pointless anymore. Sure, they had to adapt but some stayed the same, like his third rule, beware of bathrooms; only now it was less worry about pathogens, and more worry about the undead. Yeah, that was a fright for the genius when he went to the loo, only to find a flesh eating zombie trying to crawl under the stall to eat his brains.

He could remember vividly the day he first encountered a zombie. He was in Los Angeles after a case when the outbreak started and a young, rising actress knocked frantically on his hotel room door, and boy was she pretty. While Spencer was a genius, he was also just a man. So when a pretty lady knocks on his hotel room, begging for help? Well, he was a gentleman after all. What he forgot to consider was why this woman was running into his hotel room.

"Thank you, thank you so much," the woman panted, "I would've been a goner." Spencer couldn't speak. He was taking a moment to just watch her. Pretty ladies like that didn't normally talk to Spencer, hence why he was just staring at her with awe. "Yeah, no problem," Spencer stuttered out, snapping himself out of the day dream. "God, some people are just freaks," the actress complained, leaning against the kitchenette, trying to catch her breath, "I mean, I get it, I'd chase after me too, I am Lila Archer after all. But biting? Biting is just too far." Biting? Oh shit. Yeah, that definitely snapped Spencer out of his thoughts. He just let a potentially infected woman into his hotel room. As Lila leaned against the kitchenette, Spencer saw it and his eyes widened. On her left bicep was a bite mark, still covered in saliva. However, instead of a red mark, it was green with hints of purple. Small chunks of flesh, the size of teeth, were missing and that was when Spencer realised why no one else was letting her in. "The inside of the mouth is more bacteria filled than the floor, so yeah, the idea of being bitten by a stranger is disgusting. How about you take a shower, you know, help get rid of the bacteria," Spencer suggested. If he could get her in the bathroom, at least maybe he'd be able to contain her.

His plan worked.

For about twelve hours. Just as he was getting ready for bed, he heard a noise from the bathroom. "Lila, you alright in there?" he called out, trying to keep his voice even. He didn't get a response. At least, not an intelligible one. Despite Spencer's sheer intellectual capability, in a moment that could only be described as pure stupidity, he leaned his head against the door to see if he could hear anything. A hand shot through the door, breaking the wood and Spencer let out a squeal that sounded more like a nine year old girl than a twenty four year old man.

Jumping back from the door, he ran towards his nightstand and grabbed his badge and fun before bolting out of the hotel. It was the last place he wanted to be in at the moment. In hindsight, it was a pretty stupid move. His team were in that hotel and he just bolted away from them. He was on his own. But that was a thought to haunt him at a later date. Right now, he was too busy running as far away from the outbreak as possible. This was where he found his first new rule, Cardio. The zombie apocalypse was not forgiving for skinny nerds like Spencer. If he wanted to survive out here, he needed to work on his cardio. As soon as he exited the hotel, he got in the first car he could find. An FBI agent committing grand theft auto, Spencer would've laughed at the irony if there weren't brain eating, decaying, reanimated corpses wandering the city.

Spencer needed a plan. However, how could one plan for a zombie apocalypse? Not even the most well prepared individuals like Spencer could plan for something like this. That realisation hit him the same time he realised that he was utterly screwed. He had no food or water and he doubted the local 7/11s would be open. He also had limited ammunition and a revolver. If he wanted to survive then he'd need to be better prepared. So he decided that he'd try and get to Vegas. Born and raised there, at least he knew his way around there.

The drive was horrifying. Usually, Spencer hated driving. Spencer especially hated driving in an apocalypse. As he was trying to get out of LA, he saw someone else trying to do the same. Only difference between the two of them? Spencer was wearing a seat belt. And thank god he was wearing a seat belt. When the car next to him had to break quickly to try and swerve out of the way of a zombie, they went flying through the windscreen. Blood coated the glass fragments and now the zombies had a tasty snack. His fourth rule was still very applicable for an apocalypse: wear a seatbelt.

After driving for a while, Spencer found a deserted service station. He needed a break from driving and he figured he could use the supplies. So he pulled into the car park and made sure his revolver was loaded before heading in.

It was eerily quiet. Not even the cheesy cover music was playing on the speaker. It was, for lack of a better word, dead. That just crept Spencer out. Silently and slowly, Spencer wandered down the aisles, grabbing a few essentials: water, snacks, a first aid kit, a lighter with a few cans of aerosols to make a flamethrower if worse came to worse and he also grabbed a bottle of hand sanitiser - old habits died hard. Spencer had grown so accustomed to the silence, he didn't even notice the shuffling of another entity in the service station. He figured he was hearing things. So when he turned around to be face to face with a zombie, he was frozen with fear. He hardly had time to react when he heard a loud bang and then he was covered in blood. For a few more moments, he just stood there, covered in blood from head to toe.

"You're welcome," he heard a voice. He couldn't see, the blood covered his glasses. The voice snapped him out of his thoughts and he pulled his glasses off, wiping them in his bloody sweater vest. He looked up and saw you stood there with a smoking shotgun. You stood with an air of nonchalance, as if you hadn't blown the brains out of a zombie and saved his life. Before Spencer had a chance to thank you, you pulled out a pistol and another shot rang out through the empty service station. "Gotta double tap, make sure they're actually dead," you explained as if it was common knowledge. Spencer wasn't sure why the zombie wouldn't be dead, especially looking at the state of it. The flesh was already peeling off the body, revealing bones and muscles that were green with some kind of infection and where the head used to be was jaggerer pieces of decaying flesh, a broken neck bone and blood. A lot of it. However, Spencer did make a note of what you said. That would be rule number two. Instead of double washing his hands, he'd have to double shoot things to make sure they were dead. "That all you got?" you asked, eyeing his revolver. Spencer could already see the judgmental look in your eyes. He was already aware of how under prepared he was, he didn't need your criticism too.

"Yeah," Spencer nodded, still in a little bit of shock from the near death experience. "God, you're screwed." Spencer was already mentally profiling you. Guarded, blunt, and (more of a personal opinion than a professional observation) kick ass. He could do with someone like you to survive in the new reality. "Can you help me?" he asked, the words fleeing from his mouth before he had a chance to think about them. A soft laugh escaped your lips as he looked like a lost puppy. You thought about it for a second. Spencer wouldn't last a second with brains alone, he needed the strength, the athleticism. So what was the harm in helping him? Besides, at least you'd have some company. "Why the hell not," you shrugged, "Grab what you need and meet me back outside."

So Spencer did. He wished he had a spare pair of clothes, but the blood stained look was here to stay for now.

"Where you heading?" you asked as he climbed into your truck. "Las Vegas," Spencer managed, trying to not look at the arsenal of weapons in the back seat. You were definitely more prepared than he was. "Vegas it is. Me? I'm heading towards Orlando. That's what you can call me, Orlando. Understand, Vegas?" Spencer wanted to protest, tell you that he had a name and that name was not Vegas. However, with all the weaponry in the car, he was a little worried about arguing. So Vegas it was. "Yeah, I understand," Spencer nodded. "Alright, then strap in, Vegas. We're in for one hell of a ride."

[medianatomy]

No, You Don’t Have Superhero Fatigue.

(You have Capitalism Fatigue)

***

Superhero Fiction has been one of the most inspiring and hopeful genres of fiction for decades (85 years to be exact). There’s been thousands and thousands of comics, cartoons, movies, video games, songs—and anything else you can think of—inspired by this genre, and even in the new year of 2025 that still rings true. Marvel has long since departed from its humble golden age comic book days and settled into the cinematic powerhouse that is the MCU…or, was the MCU, before it mutated (no pun intended) from its small start with the Avengers 2012 movie and began churning out new movies, new exclusive mini-series, and more than was ever probably demanded of them in the first place.

For a while it seemed almost untouchable, especially during the Infinity War and Endgame arcs. In some ways it was even a cultural shift, changing comics and superheroes from something considered nerdy and synonymous with neckbeards (and other overweight, terminally online, socially disconnected man-child stereotype variants).

Of course superheroes were always cool, but the MCU made it cool to like superheroes publicly. Dare I say it made them mainstream, at least in the sense of the audience. Suddenly, you weren’t a loser for spending hours theorizing about gifts and clues in each new Marvel film, or gushing about a new character that was going to be adapted and how you as a fan would envision that—you could even make a career out of it if you wanted! Yessir, Marvel was a cinematic GIANT. Until it suddenly just stopped being one, anyways.

So what happened? When did we get tired? It wasn’t too long ago when every trailer and every hint towards a new project would leave audiences (myself very much included) on the edge of our seats, breath bated, brains insatiably hungry for the next course. Marvel used to be all consuming. I’m not good at timelines and did not closely follow the MCU (I haven’t even seen them all in order to this day LOL) so I can’t tell you the exact precise details of its fall-off. I know, from the words of other YouTubers and–partially–my own disinterest, that all the good things seemed to end with Endgame/The Infinity Saga.

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t mean that any other Marvel movie after Endgame is horrible—they’re plenty fun, for sure—but that’s about all you can say about it. They’re fun to watch. The music is cool, the effects are good, suits are accurate, they called back to this movie or comic thing and referenced a meme, etc, whatever. IDK. Not my habitat, not my environmental qualities. But they weren’t all consuming like they used to be. These films didn’t have any time to breathe on their own before an unanticipated sequel or spinoff show was thrown into our faces at top speed.

To give you an idea of what I mean, look at the phase timelines between the first saga and the current saga:

For further clarification, PHASE 1 consists of: Iron Man (May 2008) -> The Incredible Hulk (June 2008) * -> Iron Man 2 (May 7 2010) -> Thor (May 2011) -> Captain America: The First Avenger (July 2011) -> The Avengers (May 2012)

*I'm like 90% sure this film wasn’t intended for the lineup since it has a different production studio altogether and only had its rights bought after failing to meet a sequel deadline to the really weird 2003 movie.

Also, my original idea for this was to say, “hey Phase One had more space between its projects to let them be their own thing and to ensure more time and care goes into the next project because they actually cared about it at some point long ago,” but I might have actually proved myself wrong! Especially with the added information that Marvel just bought out Universal’s rights to make a movie about Hulk because they failed to make a sequel on time…good Lord. Good thing I’m only writing to myself :)

But as my hypothetical audience will see shortly, Marvel’s tendency to prioritize producing content as opposed to creating movies is a running theme in their company, and it bleeds painfully into the MCU—as is apparent with the hundreds of “The MCU is dead/dying/crumbling/declining/ and other synonyms for all those things” video essays that nitpick the same or similar issues with recent movies. And more to the matter, it’s why the phrase “superhero fatigue” even exists.

If you went back in time to 2016 during the height of SJW culture and fourth wave feminism and asked any Marvel film-bro why he thinks the MCU is done for, he would inevitably respond with something like “The SJW Feminazis” or “The Woke” or whatever. And that’s if you completely ignore how deeply rooted in politics the genre has been almost since its conception, and the inherent politics of any media featuring the U.S. government and military, and the fact that the MCU has been peddling propaganda behind shiny CGI along with every movie to ever feature the government and military.

If you asked someone now what ruined it, they’d probably say something about “the woke” or the fact that they just don’t want the stories the MCU is giving out anymore, because the stories themselves are weak and bland and scarily unprovoking. What I’m getting at is that you do not have superhero fatigue. You have Capitalism Fatigue. While I’m never one to praise industries for anything, especially since I am in a certain position of informational access and societal progression where most people are aware that Hollywood has always been an abusive greedy shithole of a place (and Walt Disney was a Nazi), it would just be wrong and an utter disservice to pretend there weren't good people with genuine passion in their work trying to make waves in the only system that allowed them to, because they always did and still do.

But the system itself, however many passionate people helped build it, has unfortunately always existed to make money, even at the cost of what they’re trying to sell. The problem lies in seeing art as a product. The problem is, of course, capitalism. Capitalism is the system that demands money above everything—above your time, health, relationships, and livelihood, and that doesn’t stop at art, because capitalism sees everything and everyone as a source of exploitation to become even richer.

For example, the artists behind Marvel’s CGI, VFX, costuming etc are overworked and underpaid and often get very little in return for what they do.

———

[mayiwritesomething]

Love is An Unfamiliar Name (Pt. 1)

You’re a sucessful and methodic award winner music composer and producer, that after working on a few movies got invited to coordinate the sound department on a TV series, by your busy and controlled schedule, it will be just another project on your portifolio… but life sometimes has a funny way to surprise you.

Wordcount: 1,6k

A/N: guys just be nice to me since this is my first fic haha, that i decided to write just for fun. I apologize if there is any mistakes since english is not my first language. In this first chapter i tried to give a little bit of our main caracter background (she may seem a little stupid at first, but she’s got a big heart and is just scared of showing too much affection). And since this is a real person celebrity fic i tried just to write a fun story. Hope you like it :)

—————————————————————————

Dinner

"Goodbye, boss! Could you please brief me on how the meeting will unfold?" Jennifer says with a smile.

"Stop calling me that! Jesus!" you respond with a less than welcoming expression, that might scare those unaware of your kind nature.

Jennifer continues to laugh, saying, "Oh, come on! I'm just getting into the spirit. I've already gathered the entire team for the project and sent you the email with the details. I heard this guy Craig is as methodical as you."

She takes another sip of a drink, the contents of which are unclear due to the image quality, but you assume it's some kind of energy-boosting juice. "I also discovered he's a fan of your work, so you're all set! The brainstorming session you organized for the plot is fantastic", she adds, concluding with a laugh, "Bye, good luck, bossy!"

“Bye Jenny!”

Jennifer, has been your assistant of nearly a decade and a friend for much longer, understood your aversion to titles. Despite this, for the next ten months at least, you were going to assume the role of a boss. Coordinating an entire sound team was no easy feat; having experience on both sides, you were well aware of the challenges ahead. However, in this case, you were not just a regular composer working on a typical project. You were a fan adapting one of your favorite games for the big screen, something that filled you with anxiety.

As Jenny had predicted, the meeting was a success. Time seemed to fly by as you delved into your passion for music and its transformative impact on a serie. This phase of your career gave you the freedom to choose your collaborators, and Craig was someone you wanted work with for some time. Over the course of a three-hour Zoom call, you found that you connected well, not only with Craig but also with the rest of the team. Together, you had a productive briefing, establishing the desired atmosphere that would align with both the essence of the game and the script you held in your hands.

As life began to regain its rhythm post-lockdown, you still felt a hint of anxiety about going out and mingling with more than four people. However, this evening called for celebration with your friends, primarily because Jenny wouldn't let you be, insisting that you only pretended to enjoy being by yourself. She believed you needed "some drinks, good food, laughter, tears, and maybe getting laid."

Following your last breakup, you had made a promise to yourself to not date anyone for a year, a vow you upheld not just for one year but for the following one as well. Suddenly, all the men and women you encountered seemed uninteresting, but you still had some fun in one night standings, which by the way made some of the people you met quite angry, as you would just leave without saying anything.

As soon as you arrived at the bistro booked by Jenny for you and the girls, Maria said out loud, “Here comes THE GOAT!!”

'”Shhhhh, Maria! This is a private place,' you whispered, glancing over your shoulder, although people were emerged in their own worlds and conversations, allowing you and your friends to enjoy a pleasant girl night.

“Come on, girl, you're the award winner here, not to mention THE SOUND COORDINATOR! Aren't you thrilled?” Jenny attempted to lighten the mood.

“Of all the episodes, by the way” Amy chimed in.

“Yes, girls, of course, I'm happy”, you replied with a smile. “I am a bit nervous and overwhelmed. It's going to be a year-long project, surrounded by a considerable number of people, that might include some famous individuals whose crazy egos I definitely don't enjoy working with.'

“But hey, you’re not a jane doe honey” Jenny added.

You went on to explain the challenges of dealing with ego driven actors. 'I don't even know what the Game of Thrones guy is like in real life, we only spoke via Zoom. He's an actor; he could portray niceness on screen and be difficult in real life. We all know that's a possibility.'

Jenny and Maria appeared surprised or apprehensive you couldn’t understand the reason, so you kept going, 'He's an actor; he can pretend to be nice and be a dick off-screen; we all know this can happen.'

“Girl… just…” Amy interjected, her expression showing concern.

“What?!” You interrupted her “ Amy, I'm not lying... I'll have to talk to him a lot,' you retorted, visibly frustrated by the thought.

"Stop!”, she continued.

“Why?” Judging by the expression on the girls' faces, you knew you had messed something up. Were the HBO executives present? Where anyone that shouldn’t be there listening to you? Damn it.

Resignation.

This time, Jenny spoke in a hushed tone, “By the 'Game of Thrones' guy, you mean the one sitting right behind you?” She attempted to maintain calm so you would’t crack. She said something else, but you were so flustered that you couldn't make out her words or anyone else's. Should you turn around to face the person behind you? Should you chuckle and say you were joking? Should you just...

“Well, I assure you I'm not a dick, even if someone who doesn't know me may think so,” a male voice behind you interjected. Damn the Game of Thrones guy.

You turned to face him, and he continued, “Hi, pleased to meet you in person, award winner sound coordinator. Well… I'm the Game of Thrones guy, or Pedro, whichever you prefer.” His words made you reflect on how snob you must have sounded. He had heard everything. You felt awful.

“Oh, well, pleased to meet you in person too, Pedro! I didn’t…” You struggled to form a coherent sentence in your head. Damn, he smelled good. “My name is... um… I am…” Nothing seemed to make sense in your mind anymore. Why say your name when you had spoken to him before?

“Never mind,” he said, smiling. “I know your name and who you are. We met before. By the way, I'm a huge fan of your work.” He knew how to be cirurgical yet polite, which made you chuckle, even though you just wanted to vanish.

Pedro was undeniably good-looking, not exactly your cup of tea, but you couldn't deny his charm. The way he responded to your stupid remarks made him seem more intriguing. You felt a bit woozy. What had you gotten yourself into?

“Pedro, I didn’t mean to be rude. I’m sorry,” you apologized, attempting to clarify. “I'm terrible with names.” You were being honest. Now he appeared more serious, and your voice began to tremble. “I mean... I'm only making things worse, aren't I?”

“A little bit,” he chuckled softly, sounding genuine. Glancing over his shoulder, you noticed a beautiful brunette lady at the other end of the table. You waved, receiving a forced smile in return. Back to Pedro. Stop behaving like a teenager. Pull yourself together. Jenny said something, but you didn't catch it. Keep. It. Together.

"I guess I'm the one who came off as a jerk... I know I sounded pretentious, and I apologize," you began, finding your voice. "I've had some really bad experiences with certain actors and their egos, so I was worried you might be like them… so i…" All those therapy sessions seemed to be paying off; he was listening to you, paying attention not only to your words but also to your uncomfortable gestures. You pushed past the discomfort and continued, "I'm truly sorry. I didn't mean to offend you." Your voice dropped to almost a whisper in the last sentence.

"So you might want to think twice before mentioning someone’s name in a private restaurant in Los Angeles, don't you think?" He spoke with a hint of irony, almost provocatively. You took the bait.

"Not tha-" You were about to respond when Jenny interjected, "Hey! I believe Pedro here has a date to attend to, right buddy?" He nodded smiling, and Maria chimed in, "And you, girl, promised us a night out and turned it into a work-related gathering." Those girls were true diplomats.

"I don’t want to take up any more of your time, Pedro," you said, maintaining a serious expression as you locked eyes with his dark gaze, your usual impenetrable poker face firmly in place.

"Never mind," he replied. "By the way-"

"Hey babe, do you want to call your friends to join us?" the attractive lady accompanying him interjected, her tone dripping with irony.

"It won't be necessary," Maria retorted, clearly annoyed. She was hungry, and anyone who knew her understood how irritable she could get when hunger struck. You KNEW she was on the verge of losing her cool.

"I'm sorry for this disruption; we didn't mean to interrupt your date, guys."

"Sorry... you do seem to like that word, don't you?" The pretty brunette girl knew how to be ironical.

"Yeah, thanks for the heads up," you responded, laughing almost manically and subtly holding Maria back, knowing she was on the brink of saying something that could have gotten all four of you kicked out of the restaurant. Jenny steered you to another table far away from them, while Amy engaged the waiter in conversation. Your hands felt as cold as ice.

"See you soon, sound coordinator... oops, AWARD-winning sound coordinator," he said with a chuckle as he returned to his table. "Hopefully, we can prove to each other that we're nice people."

"I'm looking forward to it... Game of Thrones guy." You waved and smiled more than necessary as you both returned to your respective dinner conversations.

You replayed this encounter in your mind all the way home. How could he not be angry with you? There were still a few months until filming begins, and yet you felt an unfamiliar sense of anxiety creeping in. Opening your door, you continued to mull over his ironic parting words: "Hopefully, we can prove to each other that we're nice people," you repeated with a grin.

"Well, I suppose we'll have to wait and see.” You said.

Wait. And. See.

[olympiansowl]

I’m gonna do a thread of why I think that Miriel will live. First, I’m not exactly a Tolkien expert, I still have to finish a lot of his books, but I’m gonna point out why I think killing her isn’t the best choice, not only from the “I love her and she’s my fav” line but from the “it doesn’t make sense to me as audience/reader" line. And, at the end, i will say why I think she will die. I am torn on this topic.

1 - The hints i talked about previously. Galadriel tells Miriel that she doesn't have to choose the path of fear and that she can choose the path of faith. We see that Miriel is really afraid of that faith because her father was forced out of his throne for it and, at the top, because she knows Numenor will be destroyed. She, eventually, makes a choice and we see that she has chosen faith. In the books, we know very little about her, but in the series we are actually seeing how much of an effort she’s making to follow the right path. Another hint, that might not be a hint, is the scene with that wood dolls (I don’t know the name in English, sorry) and Galadriel is saving Miriel from a dark place. Might hint that maybe something different will save Miriel in the end and it also might mean that she actually just accepted the Gods and made the right choice. Another one, that might be my favorite one: the DAMN EAGLES! Really, every single time we saw them in adaptation, it was to save someone. They saved Frodo, Sam, Gandalf, Thorin and his whole company…I know the eagle it’s sign on the scene, it shows that Miriel is the rightful Queen and in the books we see that they also disappear bc of her grandfather and bc of Pharazon, but they’re connected to the Gods, so I’m a little bit hopeful.

2 - THE GODS! Forgive me, guys, but Gods are supposed to be merciful, you know? Specially those Gods! Like, they know who tries and who doesn’t. They send giant birds to coronations and they also made clouds, like eagles but in clouds, appear on the sky to warn Numenor that they weren’t pleasing them. They see everything and not her efforts? Like bitch please there’s no way they don’t see that Miriel has been suffering like Jesus!

3 - Why her death doesn’t make sense to me in the books and why it won’t make sense if she dies like that in the series: she’s a good one. And the really, extremely good ones that I read about didn’t die. Not only that, but like I said, that woman is suffering too much to just die? When we watch a series that a woman suffers too much, she never dies. I can point a lot of female characters that suffered for at least three lives and are still out there surviving the most dangerous and traumatizing things. For me, it didn’t make sense for Tolkien to kill her just for the sake of narrative because her death doesn’t impact other arcs. Numenor was already destroyed, she was not a Queen anymore because she didn’t have a kingdom. I think he just killed her because he didn’t want to go too much into her, because it doesn’t make sense for a man that portrays faith in the way he does, to just kill of a character that has been faithful and tried to do the best for her people. In the series, she’s more explored and we actually see her efforts. She got blinded, usurped, might be forced to marry, will pass through a damn trial with a giant sea monster…all that, and all that fucking magic, and girl can’t be saved? Be fr. The actress said she had to get a license, so Miriel will probably be underwater for a time and I do believe Numenorians have some elvish blood on them, even if it’s little…she has to live.

4 - Now as a viewer. I heard, don’t know if it’s true, that they can change how a character will die, but not if that person will survive or not. Like Saruman. He dies in a different way, but still dies. So, to me, as a viewer and seeing how they’re writing female characters, it would make more sense for Miriel to die in battle. And on the last battle, alongside the others. Miriel seems to be more rational, so I have trouble thinking that she might just die while trying to make everything right. I am not the producers or the writers, so I don’t know how they would write the rest of her arc, but I could only hope to see her with Elendil, building a new kingdom. I also want to know the point of Earien. I love the actress and I know that the character is young but like…she helped usurp a Queen, using her faith against her…the same faith her father has 🤡 and she’s doing all that bc her brother decided to go to war. He could’ve stayed but he wanted to go. Why tf this girl is blaming Miriel?

5 - As a viewer again: yes, for her to die in Numenor and all might make sense bc she fought to save that damn city, but she’s also worried about its people. Like, all the faithful are supposed to leave the island and those are the ones that are faithful not only to the gods, but to her…why would she stay on that damn city? She knows how this story will end.

7 - Why I think she might die: her arc with Elendil. I love them so much it hurts, but I think they’re going to build the “she’s going to make something out of me” kinda o story line. He became her eyes and she will teach him what she knows about being a leader. Lloyd said something like that in an interview and I couldn’t agree more, because she will hear what he sees and he will hear her interpretations. The feelings they have for each other will affect their path and her death will be his ultimate push to be a leader and honor her memory. What I think to be incredibly sad is that she will drown, trying to save her city. And his late wife also drowned while trying to save their son. A parallel, a sad one.

8 - What I hope for: hope is the last one to go. I would like to see her being saved by the eagle and marrying Elendil, or at least building the city with him. It would be amazing.

9 - Make noise on social media if y’all want the magical eagle to save that woman.

[haljathefangirlcat]

Help. I think I'm actually hooked on the 2024 Fallen series. Yeah, Fallen like the paranormal romance YA Lauren Kate novel that I never read because every plot summary made it sound like simply another Twilight rip-off thing with a brooding male lead who just had to treat the Too Stupid To Live female lead like shit from the get-go "for her own good" or whatever. Also Fallen like the movie adaptation I'm like 98% sure I did watch at least once when it aired on tv and I said "eh, let's give it a try" but I remember absolutely nothing of except it being bland and boring and maaaybe also the opening scene.

I said "eh, let's give it a try" again with the series because my mom was like "oh, I heard this is good." And... it actually is good?? Not "masterpiece" or "pretty much flawless" good, or even "I'll probably still be obsessing over this in a few years" good, maybe, but "this feels pretty well-paced and I'm having fun and feeling emotions (and even feels), I'm actually curious about the solution to the mystery (even if I already know what I assume will be the main part of it) and care about the main cast of characters and want to find out more about the more minor ones, and... well, I just want to keep watching this to the end" good. "Do I have the wrong Fallen entirely in mind or was I just being a dick way back when" good.

I'm also glad to report that, four episodes in, the male lead is not a brooding asshole, the heroine does some very, very risky stuff but actually plans it through with her friends and allies instead of going off alone for no good reason except artificially amp up the drama, and I quite like them both. I don't particularly ship them (yet?), but their romance isn't some kind of grating insta-melodrama that just keeps building up and up to obscure anything interesting in the show, either. They're kind of cute, actually. I could do without the hints of a love triangle already sprinkled here and there, but the same "well, at least it's not being focused on ad nauseam" applies. And it's compensated by the fact I mostly like the other guy (in a kind of light "wanna put him in a petri dish and study him" way, at that) and also the male lead gets to have platonic female friends he cares about without the female lead needing to have a conniption over it. Plus, the way the characters go about expressing attraction feels a lot more understated than I would have expected. Which may be a weird thing to like in a romance series, but it just fits?? Between the horrors and all the deaths and gaslighting and "fuck it, we need a way to break out/find the truth"??

I have no idea how much was really changed from the book, or how. I do know that at certain points I happened to think "oh, god, here's Quirky Best Friend/Quirky Anxious Loser Best Friend/Unreasonably Petty Bitch 1/Unreasonably Petty Bitch 2 to really bring in that 2k YA Spirit. Can't avoid the high school dynamics even in a mental-institution/rehab-centre-as-a-front-for-some-kind-of-creepy-sect setting, I guess"... and now I really need all those girls to make it out okay, please.

Hell, I'm even interested in the creepy sect people. And not just in a "the heroes suck so bad that I'll get what I can from the villains" sense. I genuinely like that they disagree on how to run and protect their little cult and they seem to have their own motivations and inner struggles, and that the implication that they may be doing it all for A Higher Purpose doesn't make any of it seem any less fucked up and terrible and hurtful.

I'm not sure I'd wholeheartedly rec this show without a "yeah, the setting is literally a mental-institution/rehab-centre-as-a-front-for-some-kind-of-creepy-sect, and it goes into some really dark places in that context" caveat, as well as another one about how I'm not qualified to talk about how realistic or tactful its portrayals of mental illness, self-harm, anger management issues, emotional and mental abuse, etc. may be. I can say there's a sexually abusive relationship in it that I found depressingly believable in its build-up, with the actual sexual abuse itself kept mercifully off-screen. Aside from all this, there's a non-white character who tends to act as a bit of a handyman/Guy Who Finds Useful Stuff for the white leads' plans? But I feel he has potential to be more than that and I hope he gets some more depth or development.

All in all? I've seen Tumblr go crazy over things I found way worse in quality. And I might have a couple of femslash ships for it already. So, I'm hoping for both a second season and at least a bit of a fandom, lol.

[pech-es]

some of my thoughts after reading The Partner:

(*DISCLAIMER: while there will be NO SPOLERS, I will be discussing some basic plot and character elements so if you want to go in completely blind, keep scrolling)

TL;DR: I loved it, very excited to see it adapted, Patrick is nothing like any character we have seen Tom play, the final plot twist I found kinda unsatisfying but am curious to see how they will or won't change it, worth the read for me)

~ I blew through it in one night, so I definitely found it very compelling and interesting material! This didn't really surprise me though since I already loved mysteries and am a fast reader, but I didn't know if maybe I would be bored by the legal stuff or even just straight up not understand it. But! I found all that actually very interesting and it was easy to follow while actually being very intricate and detailed (and presumably accurate, considering the author is a lawyer and writing legal thrillers is like his whole thing).

~ I feel confident in saying that this is the most different character by far from the rest of his filmography, we have NEVER seen Tom in a role like this. I even went back to look at his list of roles to make sure I wasn't mentally erasing anything. I am not of the opinion that he's "always playing the same character" but that's definitely a common criticism of tom antis and I would absolutely fuckin love for them to try it with this lol. This will be something very fresh. Patrick is cunning, in control (both of himself and of a situation), always 3 steps ahead. But even while he's not a "hero" in any sense or really a character you're supposed to like I guess, I at least found myself wanting him to get away with it. I think it'll take skill to pull off the balance between how calculated and sometimes cold the character is while also not making him some cartoon character evil unfeeling villain. I believe Tom ABSOLUTELY has the chops and I'm excited to see him finesse that shit!!

~ Based off of reading the short little blurb on Deadline I was surprised about how the book actually went down, I thought facing up to the wife and child would be a way bigger part. I also thought that they would be the super sympathetic characters that you end up hating Patrick for what he did to them but that is nottt at all the case. They're definitely a part of the plot but they're more supporting, I would say Patrick's lover and his lawyer are the biggest players along with him. There's also just a LOT of supporting characters between all the lawyers, FBI agents, and just all the people involved with all the companies he fucked over. Not in a way where it was too much, I think it makes it very interesting. I also think all the characters are very interesting!!! It's not a case of simple good and bad, sympathetic and unsympathetic. No one is especially LIKEABLE, but some characters' actions that are technically "wrong" end up feeling kinda acceptable or even sometimes straight up justified. Or sometimes it's just so clever that it's like ok gotta hand it to you! There's some characters that are just straight up slimy and evil the whole time though lol.

~ There's not really just one plot twist that you're building towards the whole time, it feels like it's constantly unfolding and evolving and you get surprised a lot! I really liked that, it was easy to stay really engaged bc you're so frequently reading something that made me go omg then what! There is one FINAL plot twist that it ends on though and I'm not really sure how I feel about it. I like when for a big final plot twist you kinda go "OHHHH" and it makes you want to reread or rewatch with fresh eyes so you can catch all the little hints and clues and what was building up to that, and for this one I didn't really feel like anything was pointing towards this? Granted it's not some insane "and then everyone got abducted by aliens" bonkers ass plot twist, I just didn't necessarily feel like we built towards that payoff. I don't know that I'll even say I was disappointed by it, it's just sort of like oh. Well why did ABC occur if XYZ was gonna happen? Idk maybe they'll adapt the movie so that it pays off better or even sometimes in adaptations like this they change endings altogether to surprise the audience, who knows!

~ I'm kinda surprised that it's being adapted as a movie, not because I don't think it'll be a great movie, but just because I feel like this is the type of material that in this current day and age would be like an 8 episode miniseries or smth. Again, very glad for it to be a movie!! Not everything needs to be a miniseries!! I kinda want to watch some of the other movies of John Grisham works to see how they maybe sort of condense the legal stuff, bc it was a LOT of the book and I wonder how they might allocate the runtime?

~ I'm also just absolutely thrilled that Tom is producing again! I've been so enjoying seeing him get more involved behind the camera as time goes on, work it smoochie!!! Also very excited that Graham Moore is writing, obvs The Imitation Game was super widely acclaimed (haven't seen it though tbh sorrrryyy), but I also though The Outfit was so underrated, I liked it a lot!! I mean clearly the man can write/adapt a thriller. I really hope we'll be hearing more about this one sooner rather than lately bc I feel like it's become the TZ project I'm most excited about, but I also wouldn't be that surprised if it moves a little slower bc Patrick is an older character, in his 40s in the book, so there's not like a time crunch where Tom could get too old to play him like there could be with something else. That also makes me wonder if they'll age down the character a bit or just have him play older, or maybe just never really address it directly. I'm SUPER excited for casting news to come out now that I have a good grasp on all the characters. I wonder if it'll be more established names or newcomers? Also eagerly awaiting news of a director!! Basically I'm thrilled on this project and if it dies in development hell I will be so upset so everyone pls join hands and pray. I would totally recommend reading!

[m-feline]

To adapt, to survive, to live - ch 26

Silco x Freaded

Tags: avoiding the other, fight, Canon typical swearing, getting drunk, bathing, apologizing, hint of smut;

No beta, just watching it burn

Masterlist

Previous ->

I woke up, and felt my bones popping as I stretched myself. The bed I had used for four days now wasn’t as comfortable as the bed I shared with Silco. But this was the next best thing in Jinx’s place. Jinx found this place by accident. And by accident, I mean it involved some of her new tests exploding in the right places and finding of some old documents from the mines. But when Jinx saw the cavern, she decided to stay there. I wasn't okay with it at first, but after Jinx had “decorated” her new “room”, I gave her the okay for her to stay there.

Only Silco and I ever came here, if we had something to talk about with Jinx. I came here mostly to bring her food. Silco came here if Jinx called him to check her new inventions. But otherwise, our little family gathered in Silco's office to talk things, or to eat when I made something.

That was before I left the Last Drop. I didn’t mean to but Silco just had to make me more mad. That night, I had stayed in our room, laying in our bed, reading the book, till I heard the steps indicating that Silco was coming. Quickly, I turned off the bedside lamp and set the book away, and went to sleep. I heard the door open and more steps as he walked in. He glanced at the bed, and just walked to the bathroom. I didn’t need a little snake to keep an eye out, although I could have done it. I remained in the bed, pretending to be sleeping, hoping that he would the very least whisper an apology even if he thought that I wouldn’t hear him. He came out of the bathroom, changed his clothes, and went to bed and sleep.

And. That. Was. It.

No apology, not even an apology kiss, a whisper of apology. Nothing. He just went to sleep like nothing had happened. And that made me mad. After everything I had been through. After everything HE made me go through. And he didn’t say a bloody thing. Surely, he must have seen that I really wasn’t sleeping. But no. He said nothing. He didn’t even call my bluff on sleeping. He thinks I’m cool with that? He was so wrong.

The next morning, before he could even wake up, I got up, changed, and left the Last Drop. I didn’t return since. I stayed most of the day in the houses for children, seeing how things were going, then I went to check the labs. Jolynn found me and asked if I was alright. I never answered that question, and thank heavens she never asked again. I kept myself busy till night fall. When it was late enough, I went to Jinx’s place. I didn’t need to say much before she agreed to let me stay in her place. She loved it for the first three days, but even I can tell that she was getting awkward with this whole situation.

“Soooooo~, how long will you stay here?” Jinx asked, after she had eaten her fresh breakfast I made for her.

“Am I in your way?” I asked.

“Wha? No, no, nooo. It’s just that…” Jinx tried to find her words, and then she suddenly hissed at something. “I’m not saying that.”

“JP?” I asked.

“No. Nothing. It’s cool. Everything is cool,” Jinx said nervously before she ate her toast in one bite.

“Is it the voices again?” I asked.

“Noooo. No… Yes,” Jinx finally admitted with a touch of shame.

“What did they say?” I asked while I poured myself a cup of coffee from an elaborate pot that Jinx had.

“They said… that it’s embarrassing that you are here for so long,” Jinx said.

“Oh is it now?” I asked and placed the pot a bit harder to the table than I intended. “Do tell them that unlike them I’m real, and if they have a problem, they better start to talk to me too and not chicken out and hide behind you.”

“You heard her,” Jinx mumbled to the air. I sighed as looked at Jinx while I raised the cup to my lips. “How often they torment you?”

“When it’s quiet,” She said. “And when I’m not building anything new.” That explains the recent bombs and explosions yesterday. She finished her project and hasn’t had other projects to tackle. Sadly, the only thing left is for her to build more bombs. But the material isn’t free I’m afraid. If only there is another way to distract her from the voices.

I sighed as I recalled why Jinx wanted her own place. There were times she still heard the voices of Milo and Glaggor. Silco and I tried our best to help her shut them up, but it didn’t work. We both agreed that this was her trauma and that it won’t be healed so fast. But we both also knew that keeping her occupied with projects helped. That, and blowing things up.

I drank my coffee as I flipped through pages of the book of my mother. I had it brought here when I realized I could stay here. I told Jinx what it was and what I could do with it. She was amazed, of course. And she started to name the little snakes I made.

“Now that is a big snake,” Jinx said, peeking past my shoulder. I had a page open with a huge snake coming out from a person back.

“Apparently, yes,” I said as I sipped the coffee.

“Ouch, wouldn’t that hurt,” Jinx commented.

“It seems that this doesn’t work like the little ones,” I said. “The little ones become their separate bodies, while this… seems to be connected to the host.”

“Okay, what does it do?” Jinx asked.

“Hmmm, it says, I can control it, it can… bite. It… has poison… more in the next chapter,” I said as I read the lines.

“Oooh, can I name this one?” Jinx asked as she became more excited.

“You named the last five little ones, I can’t se why you can’t name this one “ I said.

“Okay, umm, I need time with this,” Jinx said as she started her loud brainstorm. “I already named Slither, Fanggy, Vipy,…” Jinx began to ramble as she went to her desk in the middle of the cave. That should keep her occupied for a while. And in peace from her illusions. I returned to my book and read a few chapters more when I heard steps coming closer to the cave. Another good quality in Jinx’s place was that it always echoed. So, it was easy to know when someone was coming. Unless Jinx would play her records at high volume.

“Jinx, tell him I’m not here,” I said before I took the book and my cup of coffee with me.

“She says she's not here,” Jinx shouted as the sound of the steps came to the end. It's interesting that when Jinx wants to, she can be discreet, but not now, apparently. Silco stood at the other end of the cave, and when he saw me, he walked quickly across towards me.

“(Y/n), we have to talk,” He said.

“No shit,” Jinx said. Silco just barely gave her a chastising glance but he kept walking at me.

“(Y/n),” Silco called me again.

“I have nothing to say to you,” I said as I moved to the side of cave where Jinx had a couch, coffee table, and other stuff.

“(Y/n), stop being ridiculous,” Silco said as he got to the same part of the cave.

“Oh hell, you didn’t just say that,” Jinx said. She didn’t say it loudly, but even if she murmured it, we all could have heard it anyway.

“Me, ridiculous?” I asked. Silco groaned as he already guessed where this was heading.

“I didn’t mean it like that,” Silco said, trying to salvage the situation. “But yes, you not coming back home for days is hard to describe as anything other than ridiculous.”

“Oh well, a bit difficult to come home, when I made it clear that I want no whores to Last Drop,” I said with a lecturing tone. “And you made very clear that according to you that’s what I am.”

“(Y/n), I was upset and misled,” Silco explained. “And no one actually heard that.”

“Oh, no one, you say?” I contradicted him. “So, you say Sevika, your top agent, is a no one?”

“She doesn’t care,” Silco said.

“And apparently, Jolynn, my assistant, is a no one?” I was so getting pissed off right now. “And Jinx, is a no one?”

“Jinx wasn’t present, I told her to leave before you came,” Silco said.

“Well, she didn’t. I saw her there right when you slapped me,” I said.

“Fuck,” Silco groaned. He looked even more remorse than before. He glanced at Jinx and she just nodded to him.

“Tell me, Silco. If you had known Jinx was there that time, would you have said those things to me?” I asked with a cold tone.

“No, (Y/n). I…” Silco sighed. “I was upset, but I still would have had some control over my words.”

“Would you have not hit her if I was present?” Jinx asked. Silco grimaced as the memories came back. He did slap me, and the fact that he did so while Jinx was present made me mad.

“After what you did, after what you said to me, you expect me to remain at the Drop and play house like nothing happened?” I asked angrily. “Worse, you did all that in front of Jinx. No, I’m not coming back while you act like you did.”

“(Y/n), I was stressed and upset, and it all just fell apart,” Silco tried to explain. “For a while, there has been trouble at the factory, and then I heard that rumor and…. I lost it. What do you want me to say?”

“How about ‘I’m sorry’?” Jinx mumbled mostly to herself, but we both could hear her. Silco sighed again. And I just rolled my eyes.

“(Y/n), I’m sorry,” Silco said.

“Not as sorry as you should be,” I said, and marched past him, bumping his side as I passed him. “I have work to do today.”

“You didn’t say you had work today,” Jinx said.

“Well, I do now,” I argued back and kept walking to the entrance, leaving Jinx and Silco behind. Once I was gone, Jinx flopped to her seat at her work desk as if she was tired.

“Well that went well,” Jinx said. “But I hoped you would get her out of here.”

“I hoped so too,” Silco sighed. “But it seems (Y/n) isn’t listening to a word I say.”

“Yeah, kinda like you back then,” Jinx said, twirling on her seat back and forth. Silco glared at her, but he remained silent. She was right. He didn’t listen when I had several times tried to explain to him the situation. Now, he was experiencing that same treatment.

“So, what now?” Jinx asked.

“Good question,” Silco said. “What worries me is how far will she take this I’m-pissed-with-you act before we can go back to normal?”

“Normal?” Jinx laughed. “Since when is this family normal? (Y/n) has a living snake on her skin, you run the crime world, and I make things that go boom.”

“So, what do you suggest?” Silco sighed.

“Go, knock her up, or whatever you need to do, just get her out of my place,” Jinx said. “It’s hard to be with my voices when she is here.”

“Isn’t that a good thing?” Silco asked.

“Yeah-no,” Jinx said, joining the two words together. “Not when I need to blow something, or plan a surprise for her.”

“Great, what else have I missed?” Silco asked think he must have missed an anniversary of something for Jinx to make me a surprise.

“Nothing,” Jinx said. “It’s not her birthday or anniversary. I just wanted to give something small for the Progress day.”

“Right, that,” Silco muttered.

“So go make up already,” Jinx said.

“Fine. I try. I try,” Silco said as he straightened up and walked away. He went through any optional plan he would need to fix this up.

--

I was sitting at the edge of the bar of the Last Drop. There were so many people, the music was loud, and the lights kept blinking on and off according to the music. With all that noise and happening, the edge of the bar was the perfect place to be if you wanted to be alone. One could see almost everything, yet no one would see you if you took the far edge seat, and that was fine by me.

I was still pissed at Silco, but I was also getting tired of being pissed. So, I had come to the Last Drop after my work. It was late, and I wanted to drink and get wasted so I could just let go of everything. Sadly, my signia made it hard to get drunk the normal way. Since I was immune to most of the poisons, I needed something extra to help the alcohol to kick in. Silco and Sevika knew that I carry small flasks of random potions. Most of the time, it was Shimmer, but sometimes I also carried different stuff as well. Very strong sedatives, stimulants, and even aphrodisiacs. I didn’t label the flasks, so I wasn’t even sure what I had. But they would always do their work. While my body works on neutralizing the potions, the alcohol can kick on and numb me like any other heavy drinker after enough drinks. Sometimes even too well. Now, I was way over my head. I have no recollection of what I had, but I sure knew the stuff in glass was whiskey.

“I finally found you,” Sevika said as she suddenly appeared next to me at the bar. Or maybe she was here already, but I didn’t notice. I guess the drink is doing the job then. “Seriously, (Y/n) where have you been? Things have been crazy here.”

“I’ve been away,” I said and took another sip from my drink. “I sure as hell ain’t staying with him after what he did.”

“You’re mad, I get it. But things are really crazy here without you doing your usual stuff.” Sevika said. “Silco isn’t doing good either. You were the moving force. Checking the club, helping with the cleanup, the food…”

“So basically you are saying he doesn’t miss his wife but a maid,” I said, sounding a bit offended. “Why don’t you hire one of the hookers to do that?”

“That was not what I meant,” Sevika sighed. “He misses you. He is pissed at every little thing someone does wrong. He barked at Thieram yesterday for not doing his drink right.”

“Well, tough tiddies for him,” I said. Sevika raised her eyebrow when she heard me.

“Excuse me?” She asked. She looked at me for a moment til realization hit her. “Oh hell, are you drunk?”

“No,” I said, yet the way I said it made it sound an obvious lie. “I can’t get drunk by drinking.”

“That is unless you drink something else first,” Sevika said angrily. “What did you take?”

“Don’know,” I said, words slurring. “But it tasted lemony. What tastes like that?”

“(Y/n), what did you take?” Sevika insisted. But that did nothing as both poisons did their job. One made me weak, and other made me drunk, and right now, I needed that. Instead of listening to Sevika, I just ordered the next drink. I don’t know when Sevika left me, but after one more drink, she was back, and this time with company.

“What the hell are you doing?” Silco asked as he saw my state.

“Drinking, Silly,” I said as if it was obvious by looking.

“I don’t know what she had, but that must be fourth or fifth glass already,” Sevika said.

“Buzz off, I’m mad at you still,” I said, intending it to Silco, but I wasn’t sure it landed at the correct person. Who cares anymore? I was drunk.

“Come now, let’s get you somewhere where you can be drunk in peace,” Silco said and came closer to me.

“I said, I’m still mad,” I said and tried to push him away.

“Fine then,” Silco said, sighing. He didn’t sound angry but very tired. “Sevika.”

Before I had time to register or say anything, Sevika helped me down from the stool and to my feet before she half walked me and half carried away from the bar. I didn’t follow where I was taken, I was more focused on staying up. But sooner than I realized, I was dropped to a familiar couch in Silco’s office.

“I take it from here,” Silco said to Sevika. Sevika just nodded and left the room, leaving me lying on the couch and alone with Silco. I didn’t see what Silco was doing and, at the moment, didn’t care since the world was spinning. But I did hear something metallic being placed close to me. It took me a moment to turn my head and see what it was. All I saw was a bucket.

“We can’t have you ruin the carpet like last time,” Silco said softly as he straightened up.

“What happened last time?” I asked groggily.

“You threw up,” Silco answered as he lowered himself to sit on the coffee table. “You were so wasted that we had to even call Signed to examine you.”

“Wow, what did I have that time?” I said partly amused and tired.

“If only you labeled those flasks I could answer,” Silco sighed tiredly. “What did you take now?”

“No idea,” I said and giggled. “But it tasted like lemon.”

“That doesn’t help us narrowing it down,” Silco said. “Was it lethal? Sedative? Amplifier? Shimmer?”

“You forgot Aphrodisiac,” I giggled. “I have those, too.”

“Did you take one now?”

“Aphrodisiac? No, no, nope. I wouldn’t be this wasted if I did,” I said, giggling.

“What did you take?”

“Guess.”

Silco sighed again and rubbed his forehead. I was never easy when I was drunk. Jinx saw me drunk once, and even she agreed that it was hilarious to see how I was so out of character. Well, that time I had taken Shimmer with my drink. This time… what did I take again? It wasn’t Shimmer nor aphrodisiac. If it was sedative, it would make me sleepy, silly, honest, and a bit flirty. If it was a stimulant, I would soon get up and go back down for another drink and maybe bust a move on the dancefloor or punch someone who tries to stop me. I have very few memories of taking lethal poisons.

“It could be… sedative,” I said after a moment of silence as I had been staring the roof.

“Good,” Silco sighed again, but this time in relief. Now that he knew what was in my system, he knew how things would play out. “Remain here and sleep it off. If you must have something to drink after that, you can have my best bottle and finish it all by yourself. Just no more mixing poisons at the bar.”

“Your best bottle? You never let anyone touch your bottles,” I asked in shock and surprise, but also a bit happy that I got more to drink.

“Well, consider it an apology,” Silco said as he got up from the coffee table. “I… owe you that much.”

“You sure as hell…” I cut my words as I could taste acid in my mouth. Silco glanced at me, wondering why I stopped halfway. And before he could ask, I turned, grabbed the bucket, and threw up in it. Silco got down and helped me gather my hair out of the way.

“Correction. It was not sedative,” I said after I finally got out whatever it was that came out.

“What it was then?” Silco asked, rubbing small circles on my back.

“I rarely took them, but I guess,” I said as I straightened up and wiped my mouth to the back of my hand. “Some lethal potions I have been testing with Signed.”

“You take those with alcohol?” Silco asked with disapproval in his voice.

“They make me drunk,” I said. I had to throw up again. Silco remained with me till I was done. I laid myself back on the couch from exhaustion, while Silco got up and returned to his desk to do something. Don’t know what it was but he finished it quickly and came back to me.

“Do you need anything?” He asked. His patience sometimes is limitless when it comes to Jinx and me. I wanted to say that he was too busy to help me, but something told me that he had already cleared his schedule when he learned that I was at the bar drinking. After throwing up a couple of times, I was sober, so I decided to pull back any remarks of his job.

“I will be fine,” I said as I rubbed my eyes. “I will go to the bathroom later and sit in the tub for a while.”

“Lets go then,” Silco said as he got up and began to help me.

“I can go by myself,” I protested. “I’m partly still mad at you.”

“Then allow me to make it up to you,” Silco said, his voice still soft as if he was speaking to a temperamental child. I was too tired to continue arguing, so I took his hand and got up. And I instantly regretted it as I wobbled with my first two steps before Silco got me and kept me up.

“Easy now,” He said and guided me to our room. The beat of the music almost hammered my head before we made it to our room, and once the door closed, all the noises were muffled. Silco guided me straight to the bathroom and helped me to sit on the toilet.

“I will fill the tub. You stay here,” Silco said.

“I’m not a child, Silco,” I groaned.

“No, you have a hangover. And that makes you vulnerable as one,” Silco said.

“At least, put the light on,” I said.

“Only the ones at the front,” Silco said while he put the water running to the tub. Meanwhile, I began to take off my clothes, starting with my shoes. While he went to set the lighting, I was undoing my dress. The bathroom had two sets of lights, the front and the back. The front ones were softer and mostly illuminated the entrance and the sink. The back lights were brighter and illuminated, basically the whole room with the shower and bathtub area. But now, with only the front lights, the room was illuminated with soft yellowish light that barely reached the tub at the very back of the bathroom. Silco added some soap and liquid to the bath water and moved his hand in the water to mix them before he closed the tap. He was about to ask something before I walked past him and entered the tub on my own. I sighed as warm water hit my skin, and I leaned against the tub, having most of my body submerged under the scented and colored waters.

“Is it good?” Silco asked leaning over me.

“Perfect,” I said as I closed my eyes.

“I need to go a warp up things at the club, but I will be back soon,” Silco said and caressed my head. I just hummed and enjoyed the water. I heard him leave and door closing. And then I just sat there with content and tiredness. Maybe it would be best to give him slack and come back. Yes, I was still mad. But I was getting tired of this fight. But just to make sure, I was still expecting him to apologize. If he did, I would sleep with him in our bed again. Will we do more? Well, that depended how sincere his apology was. If he didn’t apologize I make him sleep on the couch while I took the bed. But considering how he has been fussing over me a minute ago, the changes of him apologizing if I asked were high. So, we might be sharing a bed tonight. I was still going through where I set the line on what else I allowed him to do when Silco came back to the bathroom.

“How are you feeling?” He asked as he entered the bathroom.

“Better,” I said. That was all I could say before Silco began to undo his vest. “What are you doing?”

“Don’t worry I’m just removing the vest and the pants,” Silco said. I raised an eyebrow at him, but he didn’t comment further as he pulled his pants down and just remained in his dress shirt and boxers. I followed him as he came behind me and took out shampoo and another bottle.

“Face forward,” He instructed. I did as he said and heard him pick up one bottle and pump the liquid out to his hand. When I felt his hands on my scalp, I knew what he was doing. As he began to wash my hair, I leaned back against the tub and let him do my hair. It felt good. He has never done this to me before. Sure, he has eagerly helped to wash my body but not my hair. I always did that as I used specific shampoos and oils for my hair to keep my hair shiny and healthy. Since I had been away for a while, my hair treatment was over due, but having Silco do it now for me felt nice. I just need to make sure he uses the right bottles. When he rinsed my hair with water, he placed his hand to cover my face from the water. When he stopped, I turned to him.

“Are you going to do my whole hair treatment?” I asked with amusing smirk.

“I can’t do all of it,” Silco said as he picked up another bottle. “But I can wash it and put conditioner on your hair. You just have to finish the treatment yourself later.”

“Or you do it as I tell you what to do,” I said.

“Fine,” Silco chuckled. “What’s next?” With my instructions, Silco did my hair according to my treatment. And he finished it by wrapping my hair with a towel and leaving it sit there. I turned again and placed my hands over another before placing my chin over them as I watched Silco. His hair was slightly damp from the steam in the bathroom, and his makeup was coming off. But otherwise, he looked so handsome to me. He leaned closer and placed his forehead against mine.

“I’m sorry, (Y/n),” He sighed.

“About what?” I asked as I closed my eyes.

“For doubting you, for hitting you, and most importantly, disrespecting you in front of our daughter,” Silco said. “I shouldn’t have done it, but…” He sounded like he was about to say something else but held it in. He was on his way to my good side. He better not stop now.

“Go on,” I said. Silco seemed to be bracing himself before he spoke again.

“You are very dense sometimes, you know that?” Silco said.

“Excuse me?” I asked.

“Hear me out first,” Silco said with patience. “It is not that I don’t trust you to be faithful. But there are times you leave yourself so open and vulnerable that anyone down here could abuse it.”

“You are not making your point,” I warned him.

“You get yourself drunk with poisons and leave yourself right in the open for everyone to see,” Silco said, raising one finger. “You hire anyone with a sob story to your houses without regard who they are.” I pouted as he lifted a second finger. “You harm yourself in the name of trying new things or testing your signia.” He lifted a third finger.

“Is that all?” I asked, frowning.

“There is a couple of more, but I think three reasons get my point,” Silco said. “When I heard that someone might have slept with you, I thought you had lost yourself in somewhere and gotten used by some animals.” I was still frowning, but I was less angry with him. I appreciate he worries for me but he should know better.

“One; I rarely get drunk, and when I do, it is always inside this establishment,” I said, lifting my finger. “Two; I have people who monitor all my new recruits, so I know exactly who they are, and I have dealt them accordingly. Besides, the only time I ever meet them again is when I make the rounds myself, which isn’t that often.” I lifted my second finger. “Three, I know my limits. Be it testing new potions, starving for half a day, enduring harsh words, or whatever it is you think I’m doing to harm myself.” I lifted the third finger. “And I endure it all because I know you and Jinx are here for me. When I come home tired and worn out, it all melts away when I have you cuddle me in our bed, even if it’s just that. I feel better when you or Jinx say some people can fuck it, and that I should forget them. And I know that one day Zaun will be real, and then we need things to work. We need people to look after each other instead grinding each other to sumps.” I placed my hand against Silco’s disfigured cheek. The makeup was half gone now and I could feel the rough texture of the skin. Silco closed his good eyes and leaned against my hand with a sigh. “And most importantly I know you will never let anyone lay a hand on me.”

“Am I forgiven then?” He asked.

“Not yet,” I said, smirking. Silco opened his good eye and looked at me with a raised eyebrow. “You did promise me your best bottle, for starters.”

“For starters?” Silco repeated my words.

“While I drink, you can also tell me how you handled the scum who dared to dream of having me,” I continued with a smile.

“Should I worry how me being violent turns you on?” Silco asked.

“You being violent and possessive,” I corrected him. “And isn’t that how many beasts conquer their mates? Defeating and killing their rivals.”

“Fair point. Anything else?” Silco asked as he kissed my hand, still caressing his face.

“How about I top you tonight?” Silco chuckled softly as he leaned closer.

“Aren’t the males usually on top when the beasts mate?”

“Not necessarily,” I said as I sneaked my hand behind his neck. Before he could react, I grabbed his hair behind his head and brought him closer. He let out a wonderful gasp. “Did you know, although male starts the mating, snakes entwine their bodies so there is no way knowing which is on top or which is at bottom.”

I could tell he was aroused. Not only by the smell, but his good eye dilated as well. I rarely took control over our bed activities, but when I did, I knew exactly what he liked.

“What do you say? Can you earn my forgiveness?” I asked.

“Yes, ma’am,” Silco said. Oh yes, he was into it already. I kissed him hungrily, and I could tell he wanted to take control of the kiss. That was how we played this. But he knew when to submit. And that he did.

My bath time soon ended, and we went to our bedroom where the bottle he had promised waited with two glasses. While I had my drink, Silco kissed my whole body drinking the water droplets off my skin. He soon went down and pleasured me as he knelt. And from there, we ended like snakes under the sheets, entwined with each other, no idea who was on top and who was at the bottom. But there was no denying that we ended up satisfied.

Next->

[mrporg]

I don't know exactly when it happened, but at some point in our recent history, we stopped being hopeful about progress and optimistic about the future. I'm not saying this is without good reasons, but I kind of miss the rose-tinted glasses.

In Things to Come (1936), the movie adaptation of The Shape of Things to Come by H.G. Wells, Oswald Cabal make this speech at the end of the movie:

- Oh god, is there never to be any age of happiness? Is there never to be any rest? - Rest enough for the individual man. Too much and too soon, and we call it death. But for Man, no rest and no ending. He must go on, conquest beyond conquest. First this little planet, and its winds and waves. And then all the laws of mind and matter that restrain him. Then the planets about him, and at last, out across immensity to the stars. And when he has conquered all the deeps of space and all the mysteries of time, still he will be beginning. - But... we're such little creatures. Poor humanity is so fragile, so weak. Little..., little animals. - Little animals. And if we're no more than animals, we must snatch each little scrap of happiness, and live and suffer and pass, mattering no more than all the other animals do or have done. It is this, or that! All the universe or nothingness! Which shall it be?

Oswald Cabal and Passworthy, Things to Come (1936)

I haven't read the book (one of my failings), so I can't tell whether it was Wells or the writers who came up with this speech, but I find it interesting that at that time - right before WW2 - they already considered the internal struggle of humanity between progress and complacency, and made it one of the major points of the story (albeit among others).

This is not the only movie about progress mind you. A much more recent one, Tomorrowland (2015) takes us back to one of the last great World Fairs, and paints a hopeful future. At least for a little while, before turning downright depressing, and recovering only at the very end. This movie isn't a masterpiece, but it has one of the best villain ever, played by Hugh Laurie. The reason he's so great is because he is hardly a villain at all. Indeed, he's just a guy who has become desperate that humanity has decided to close its eyes to its problems and is heading for its doom. I really like the speech that he gives:

Let's imagine. If you glimpsed the future and were frightened by what you saw, what would you do with this information? You would go to... who? Politicians? Captains of industry? And how would you convince them? With data? Facts? Good luck. They only facts they won't challenge are the ones that keep the wheels greased and the dollars rolling in. But what if..., what if there was a way of skipping the middleman, and putting the critical news directly into everyone's head? The probability of widespread annihilation kept going up. The only way to stop it was to show it. To scare people straight. Because what reasonable human being wouldn't be galvanized by the potential destruction of everything they have ever known or loved? To save civilization, I would show its collapse! But how do you think this vision was received? How do you think people responded to imminent doom? They gobbled it up, like a chocolate éclair. They didn't fear their demise, they repackaged it. It can be enjoyed as video games, as TV shows, books, movies. The entire world wholeheartedly embraced the apocalypse and sprinted towards it with gleeful abandon. Meanwhile, your Earth was crumbling all around you. You've got simultaneous epidemics of obesity and starvation. Explain that one!

Governor Nix, Tommorowland (2015)

Bees and butterflies start to disappear. The glaciers melt. Algae blooms all around you. The coal mine canaries are dropping dead, and you won't take the hint! In every moment, there is the possibility of a better future. But you people won't believe it. And because you won't believe it, you won't do what is necessary to make it a reality. So you dwell on this terrible future, and you resign yourselves to it. For one reason, because that future doesn't ask anything of you today. So yes, we saw the iceberg, we warned the Titanic. But you all just steered for it anyway, full steam ahead. Why? Because you want to sink. You gave up. That's not the Monitor's fault, that's yours.

And I think he's right about that. At some point, we stopped believing in progress and science. We stopped believing in a better future, and we started instead focusing on the negatives, trying to limit the damage to our own lives. I'm not saying no-one is fighting the good fight anymore. As a matter of facts, plenty of people still do. But I think as a society we have kind of given up, and we are ignoring the few of us who haven't. I am unsure what it would take at this point to set us in a different direction, hopefully not another world war like in Things to Come.

We are already measuring the damage of the gloomy future we have been imagining for ourselves: ecological issues, late-stage capitalism, populism, oppressed minorities, degraded education and health, etc... I believe that we have already everything we need to make each day better than the previous one. But instead of working together on that, we prefer competing in the "who has the most" and "who I hate the most" competitions.

And again, I think governor Nix has a point with regards to self-fulfilling prophecies. Very few art pieces these days remain hopeful nowadays. We prefer stories of apocalypses, downfalls, tragedies. The futures we imagine for ourselves are cyberpunk capitalist hellscapes, zombie apocalypses, ...

"When I was young, the future was different" - Frank Walker (Tomorrowland)

Brb, I'm going to go watch some Star Trek and its hopeful post-scarcity utopia.

[platoapproved]

Where did you get the inspiration for lestat in “even the iron still fears the rot”?

Specifically ch 1/3: “He muddled through all on his own. He let his body be his guide, taking note of every instinct and working back from there.”/“But he bore it. What other choice did he have?”/“Lestat was tired of memory and suffering; it was not like him to wallow. He had always before found some way to wrench happiness from the unfeeling world. He was ready to laugh again, to frolic, to rejoice.”/“Lestat did not often dwell on his own poor choices. He did what he believed was best in the moment—often without a great deal of forethought—and dealt with the consequences, whatever they might be. An easy philosophy to champion when the punishment landed on him alone.”/“Could he have prevented this, if he had just been honest?”/“What a fool he’d been.”/“Never again would he play Cinderella’s stepsister, lopping off parts of himself to fit someone else’s impossibly small slipper.”/“He was going to suck every last drop of happiness from the world, and damn anyone who tried to stop him.”

Some of these feel obvious, but i would still love to hear your process of writing!

GOSH this is very flattering, anon! I will do my best to answer thoroughly, though with many of these I'm not really drawing on specific canon moments...

“He muddled through all on his own. He let his body be his guide, taking note of every instinct and working back from there.”

A lot of what I wanted to do in this fic is kind of explore Lestat's first days as a vampire in a way that marries what he described in the TV adaptation and what is there in The Vampire Lestat. In the book, Magnus gives at least a few instructions before his suicide; in the show Lestat says he didn't tell him about vampire physiology and gave him 'no rules, no counsel'. So I thought, if the latter is true, how did Lestat figure out how to survive in those first few days? He would've had hints from observing Magnus - drinking blood, hunting at night etc. - but the rest he would just need to figure out on the fly. Lack of education is a really big and sensitive topic in Lestat's life, and that applies to surviving as a vampire as much as it does to reading.

“But he bore it. What other choice did he have?”

Another thing I wanted to TRY to show was how Lestat becomes the person we see him being in season 1 of the show. Like, a trajectory from the rather sweet generous naive human guy he is early in TVL to the jaded, guarded, selfish, hedonistic, human-hating sadist he is in New Orleans. He tells Louis and Claudia that he didn't want to be a vampire or feed on people, that he was repulsed by it early on. So this is showing him at that stage, still seeing his human victims as people and horrified to take their lives, in a way that mirrors Louis later on. This is the starting point, to give contrast when his opinions start to change.

“Lestat was tired of memory and suffering; it was not like him to wallow. He had always before found some way to wrench happiness from the unfeeling world. He was ready to laugh again, to frolic, to rejoice.”

IWTV is so fascinating to me in part because it shows how different people react to trauma in radically different ways. At this point, Lestat is in such a bad place, but his way of handling it is to throw himself into denial and hedonism. It puts him in an interesting place to see Armand as this fun sexy stranger who is something to focus on to avoid thinking about everything that happened with Magnus and how his life is falling apart. That's an interesting ground, to me, for the very start of their relationship: Lestat seeing Armand as a means to an end (a self-indulgent distraction) rather than... a person with his own perspective and needs and experience, etc.

“Lestat did not often dwell on his own poor choices. He did what he believed was best in the moment—often without a great deal of forethought—and dealt with the consequences, whatever they might be. An easy philosophy to champion when the punishment landed on him alone.”

Lestat is impulsive. He acts without thinking and sometimes that is hilarious and sometimes it is..... not. This is, to me, the core of Lestat as a character. I like the idea of him being aware of it, but also having no inclination to change.

“Could he have prevented this, if he had just been honest?"

In a rare moment, Lestat is blaming himself unnecessarily. Honestly, the Children of Darkness were going to come after him one way or another. Him telling Nicki that he was turned imho wouldn't have prevented Armand's actions...

“What a fool he’d been.”

This is where Lestat's hurt over Nicki is starting to calcify into some pretty toxic beliefs about relationships. Lestat considered Nicki's needs above his own while he was alive and Nicki secretly resented it; Lestat regrets not spending more of his mortal life looking after his own happiness and is bitter over prioritizing his lover. So this is Lestat looking at all that and telling himself 'it's foolish to deny yourself things if it will make your lover happy, you should put yourself first always'. So much of how he mistreats Louis is a response to his relationship with Nicki imho and I wanted to show those threads.

“Never again would he play Cinderella’s stepsister, lopping off parts of himself to fit someone else’s impossibly small slipper.”

More of the same as the last quote, really. In some ways, Lestat's commitment to be 100% himself without censorship or shame is a wonderful thing. But he's also starting to associate... any kind of compromise or accommodation of a partner as mutilating himself. Positioning getting everything he wants and doing whatever he wants as his own safety / wholeness. Especially in this last chapter, I wanted it to be romantic but also for the reader to hopefully get a sense of... it's moving past liberation and self-acceptance and into deep selfishness and a refusal to acknowledge that the needs of others matter.

“He was going to suck every last drop of happiness from the world, and damn anyone who tried to stop him."

This also is along that same theme: Lestat is re-evaluating his private entertainment and joy and freedom as the most important thing in the world, regardless of how cruel or selfish it may make him to others. He's not going to be mourning over the humans he eats or making compromises etc. But also... I feel like a lot of what I'm saying in this post is underlining the negative, because I feel like that's the easier bit to overlook in the context of the fic. But... Lestat living to the fullest and embracing his life as a vampire is also kind of a good thing! Him wanting to look after his own happiness is not bad! It's just... he takes it too far, and there are consequences.

This is very long winded and probably not nearly as articulate or as insightful as you might have wished but I hope it is at least a little interesting to you, anon!

[coffee-with-mint-syrup]

Look, I didn't want to be "that" person

who criticizes something just because "it was different in the books".

But I love PJO just way too much to not feel frustrated at the tendencies of modern adaptations that I think new series is suffering from. And I feel much more frustrated because in others aspects the new show is great.

First of all, what's with this downplayed brutality of PJO world? The moment Sally started her speech about Perseus I smelled trouble. In her story, in her reasoning she named him after Perseus because of this beautiful story where happy ending is just something that happens. While in the books thats a huge deal that Percy is named after THE ONLY HALF-BLOOD HERO that had that happy ending. That fact is supposed to highlight the mortality rates and that for most of these demigods happy ending is pretty much NOT IN PROSPECT. Like, despite that rambling post I'm usually fine with some differences that are made in adaptations, most of them I usually can understand. But why do you need change the message of "I named you that way because I hope you will live happily ever after despite being in constant danger" to "I named you that way because it's a beautiful story about a mother and a son"? Especially when they absolutely could do both?

Secondly, the Gabe issue. You see, Percy Jackson books were great because they were able to discuss with children some pretty heavy themes without downplaying them - like domestic abuse. And that scene with poker players and Gabe getting from Percy money was brilliant because it showed that Gabe was so awful that he took everything he could even from a 12 y.o. There were also heavy implications that he beat Percy. But now Gabe is just your usual jerk who is lazy and doesn't have a good relationship with his stepson and argues with his wife all the time. Look, I know, that is awful too, I know that. But the point of Gabe that he was absolutely the worst. That he's the worst of the worst that's why he smells on this metaphysical level and is able to hide Percy. That he kinda deserved what happened to him in the end. And now I sure that we won't get that end because apparently that stuff is too brutal for kids. If they're afraid that much younger audience would get shocked by it they could at least do that in hints, you know. Old shows were great with things that you didn't understand as a child and then later while rewatching them you finally could get the message.

And what's with this Grover thing? Okay, I understand they probably didn't have the time for establishing why Percy would feel betrayed by his teacher but wanted to save this "low point" for Percy's character. But why? Why? How Percy as a character and we as viewers are supposed to feel that amazing friendship if it started for us with betrayal? That just sucked.

Also, personal flaw - they really could insert "This is a pen" line when Brunner gave Percy the pen. They really could and that would be so awesome. But they didn't.

And the sad part is that now I understand that there was no way they could include this important stuff in the series. Because Disney is too afraid to show domestic abuse. They afraid to show Sally Jackson that put up with heavy abuse just to keep her son safe. They afraid to show that literal children die in PJO world. That that half-blood stuff is no game - as Percy said in the very first minute of the series. For fuck's sake they didn't even mention him having ADHD! They implied that by saying that he was being weird! That was so so so so important that those things that kids with ADHD are struggling make them so special and strong in their own way. And now that message is gone too.

And all of that is because Disney doesn't have any balls left. It's like they sanitize everything they make into that 0+ versions of stories while sometimes the point of the story is in discussing something from a real, sad and unsanitized world.

The stuff I listed is just from the first episode and I don't know if the show will go that way, if this tendency of sanitizing the story will continue or not. I'm just really afraid that all of that means that they decided to leave out all the brutality that made Percy Jackson so iconic. It is like watching this new version of Harry Potter where he doesn't live under the stairs - that maybe doesn't change much story-wise but it's just not the same Harry Potter that way.

I want to like the show, I really do. Walker is so amazing is this role. Other actors are really great. I see the effort, I see how people tried to make this adaptation as close to books as they could. The show looks truly amazing. The fight with minotaur was absolutely stunning. Ending sequence is a masterpiece. I have so many good things I can say about it. But those little things they changed - they weren't little at all. A huge chunk of what made those books so special at least for me is gone (especially in comparison with Harry Potter books). And I can't help feeling sad.