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stargazer-sims · 1 year ago

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Epilogue (Journal Entry #62)

Postscript (Journal Entry #61) // STORY INDEX

Victor

I have everything I've ever wanted.

Not many people can say that, and I feel exceptionally privileged to be among the lucky few.

I know we said we weren't going to use our journal any more, but earlier tonight as I was packing up for our flight home, I was struck by the feeling that I needed to record one last entry. To be honest, I haven't even thought about our journal in over six months, not since our anniversary trip to Sulani, but I remembered something Yuri said to me during our visit to the islands and I kinda wanted to share my feelings.

He asked me if I'd ever felt like I was exactly where I was supposed to be in life. At the time, I’d said no. I told him I wasn't there yet because there were still things I wanted.

The funny part is, I just realized today that I'd misunderstood the question. I thought he'd been talking about tangible, definable things like good health, a nice home, a job, or the support of family. And yeah, maybe that was part of it, but what I think he really meant was something less easy to measure; confidence, self-worth, happiness, and the knowledge that we really do have an impact on the world and the people around us.

I should have said yes. Sitting there on the balcony of our Sulani rental cottage, gazing at the sea with my brave, beautiful, intelligent husband by my side, I could easily have said I had it all. I was happy, secure and loved, and everything seemed perfect. But, unfortunately, I hadn’t viewed the question that way because my mind had been on all the things I still wanted to accomplish, such as going to university, finding a new job, and of course getting back to competing in my sport.

Now I have all those things too, and more besides. If you've got a minute to stay and listen, I'll tell you all about it.

Maybe I should've mentioned from the start that we're currently in Switzerland, 'cause it probably isn't obvious from the inside of this hotel room. Like, it's an upscale hotel, but it's pretty generic as far as hotels go and I don't think there's anything particularly Swiss about it.

We've been here for the past week, for the FIS World Snowboarding Championship, and let me just say, it's been an absolute whirlwind of travel, activity and excitement. Tonight's been the first opportunity I've had to stop and process it all, and I think I'm going to need a while for some of it to fully sink in.

As you guys already know, last season ended catastrophically for me, but it wasn't as epic a disaster as I initially imagined. I was doing really well up until my accident, with top-three finishes in a handful of qualifying competitions. As it turned out, my wins from last season plus my wins from this current season were enough to qualify me for two events at Worlds this year, super-G and my best event, parallel giant slalom. I may have mentioned it before, but the world championship competition for snowboarding is held every second year, so if you’re confused about why last year’s points counted, that’s why.

I was thrilled about qualifying, needless to tell you, and so was Davey, my coach. I've qualified for Worlds twice before, but didn't do as well as I'd hoped on either attempt. This time, I was confident going into it, and I was ready physically as well as psychologically.

That's not to say I wasn't nervous. I think a person would have to be crazy not to be at least a little nervous about hurtling down the side of a mountain at seventy-five kilometres per hour with nothing but a helmet, wrist guards, and the grace of the Watcher to protect them. But, alpine snowboarding isn't a sport for people who don't know how to conquer their fear. Out there on the mountain, fear could literally kill you. Any kind of distraction could, and every time I think about my crash last January I'm reminded of that, and of how lucky I am to be back on my board and still able to compete at this level.

Anyway, seven days ago me and Yuri boarded a plane for Switzerland along with Davey, his partner Lindsey, and their sign language interpreter Kayley. Having travelled with Davey before, I knew what to expect, but I think it was jarring for Yuri. Davey and Lindsey are both super loud, and it's not entirely because they're deaf and can't hear themselves properly. They're just... extreme. Like, they bring the party with them wherever they go and it’s never a quiet affair.

By the time we reached our destination, all Yuri wanted to do was hide in our hotel room. He said he'd had enough of interacting with other people, and told me that he wouldn't mind if I wanted to go hang out with some of the other athletes on my own. I decided to stay with him because my first event was on the following afternoon, and I like to get lots of rest the day before I compete. As much as I enjoy a good social gathering, I didn't want to break my ritual. Athletes can be superstitious, and it'd be silly to try convincing you I'm an exception.

So, you're wondering how I did in that first event, right? I came in third, which earned me a bronze medal. That was the highest I'd ever placed at any event at Worlds, and even if I didn't win anything else, I would've been totally satisfied with that.

But, there was still my second event. In the middle of the week, I made it through the elimination races, and the final for the men's parallel giant slalom was yesterday morning.

I woke up early, too excited and full of adrenaline to sleep as much as I should have. I slipped out of bed and headed for the shower, trying not to wake Yuri as I went. My efforts were in vain, however. I was only in the bathroom for about ten minutes, and when I exited it, I saw a very sleepy-looking Yuri sitting up in bed and talking on the phone to somebody. The second thing I noticed was that he had my phone.

"Yes, I want to tell him, but I'm not sure that's a good idea right before his event," Yuri was saying. He was speaking English. "Maybe we can call you after—"

"Who are you talking to?" I asked.

Yuri looked up, clearly startled. "Oh! Victor, I didn't hear you coming out. It... it's your mother. I'm sorry. I saw the caller ID, and I decided I'd better answer it."

"It's okay," I said. "Can you put it on speaker?"

He lowered the phone from his face and touched the speaker button as I flopped onto the bed next to him. "You're on speaker now, Dr. Grace," he said. "Victor's right here."

"Hi Mom," I said. "What's up? Everything okay? It's like, the literal middle of the night where you are, isn't it?"

"Yes," Mom said. "I think you're five hours ahead of us."

I glanced at the time display on the top of my phone screen. "Mom! It's one-thirty in the morning over there! Why aren't you in bed?"

My mother laughed. "Excuse me, sir. Which one of us is the parent in this relationship?"

"Sorry," I said, but I was relieved she sounded so upbeat. I told myself that her reason for phoning couldn't be anything too bad, or she wouldn't be joking with me. "Seriously, what's up?"

"I checked your mailbox after work today. You got a letter from the university."

"Really? What does it say?"

"I wasn't about to open your mail, was I?" she said. "But, I knew you'd want to know straight away."

"And you waited until it was morning here, so you could tell me as soon as possible?" I met Yuri's gaze. "And you didn't want her to tell me before my event."

"I didn't want you to get distracted," he said. "I thought it'd be better to wait until later."

"I guess I can't get mad about that," I conceded. "I mean, it makes sense, and I'm glad you were looking out for me, but now I'm going to be distracted if I don't know what it says."

"What if it's not good news?" Yuri asked.

"Either way," I said.

"I have the letter," Mom said. "Do you want me to open it and read it to you?"

"Yes, please."

We could hear her opening the envelope. Yuri reached for my hand.

The university's application deadline for the nursing program had been the first of November, and I'd gotten everything submitted on time. According to the admissions website, applications would have one of three decision statuses — rejected, accepted or waitlisted — and decision letters would start going out around the end of March or beginning of April.

Now, here we were at the very end of March, and we'd arrived at the proverbial moment of truth.

"Okay," Mom said. "Are you ready?"

I nodded, mostly because I was too worked up to speak, and Yuri said, "He's ready."

"Dear Mr. Okamoto-Nelson," my mom read. "After a careful review of your application, we are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted into the Bachelor of Nursing program. We will be pleased to welcome you as a new student in the fall semester."

There was more, but I didn't take in anything after the first couple sentences. Yuri flung himself into my arms with a little cry of joy, and we nearly rolled off the bed in our excitement. Poor Mom was trying to explain something about registration fees and student health insurance, but we weren't paying attention.

When we finally composed ourselves, I apologized and asked Mom to keep the letter for me until we got home. I knew there would be things to do and deadlines to have them done by, but at that moment, the competition was priority one. I couldn't lose sight of why I was here in the mountains of Switzerland. As overjoyed as I was about the news that I'd gotten accepted into nursing school, I couldn't let it take my focus away from what I was doing today, not so much because I wanted to win, but because of what I said before. Distractions can be deadly.

"I'll let you go for now," Mom said. "You can call me later and let me know how the competition went."

"We'll definitely call you," I said.

"I'll be looking forward to it. Good luck, and be safe."

I thanked her, and then we said goodbye and hung up. It took me a while to calm down after that, and Yuri had to help me do some concentration exercises.

Once I sorted myself out and we were both dressed and ready, we met Davey, Lindsey and Kayley for breakfast. After that, Yuri and I went back to our room to collect Elsa and the rest of my gear, and then we all headed to the venue.

When we got there, I tried not to look around too much, but it was hard to ignore the huge crowd that had already gathered to watch the competition. We hadn't even started yet, and people were already cheering, using noisemakers, and waving flags of various countries. I think the flags were mostly Swiss, but I spotted lots of others. There were even a few Canadian red maple leaves among them.

It was obvious that even with the help of his hearing aids, Davey was struggling to hear amid the ambient noise from so many people. I was the one competing, but he looked extraordinarily stressed. I was sure it was the confusing jumble of sounds that was upsetting him more than thoughts of the competition though, and I couldn't help wondering how he coped with it when he was still a competitor himself.

I soon found out. Lindsey poked him to get his attention, and then signed something to him. He grinned at her before deftly tugging his hearing aids out and putting them in the front pocket of his coat.

He gave us the thumbs-up, and then practically yelled, "Yes! Sweet silence!"

I lost it.

Laughter did the trick. I instantly felt more relaxed, and although I knew Davey hadn't been trying to be funny on purpose, I still offered him one of the few ASL signs I know. "Thank you."

He signed something to Kayley, and she told me, "He says you're welcome, and also he's going to leave his hearing aids in his pocket. I'll come up to the top of the run to help you." She paused while Davey signed something else. "Because he wants to give you the best damn pep talk ever."

"Sounds good," I said, and when Kayley interpreted that for Davey, it was his turn to laugh.

"Okay, my dude, let's get up there!" he said loudly. "You're gonna crush it!"

"Here's hoping," I said.

I turned to Yuri, and just like at every competition he attends with me, he put my helmet on me. He stood on tiptoe to give me a kiss, and then while our heads were still close together, he whispered. "I love you."

My heart was full with that simple phrase all the way up the mountain, but at the top of the run, it was a different story. I don't know if you've ever heard athletes or performers talk about being in the zone, but it's like this intense state of hyper-focus where nothing exists except the task in front of you. I don't experience it every single time I compete, but most of the time I do, and this morning I was totally in the zone.

I was in the middle of the start order, and there were about eight riders ahead of me. When it was my turn, there was nothing in my mind except the mountain and the snow and the course of red and blue flags stretching out in front of me. I was aware of every muscle in my body and every breath and each beat of my heart. I snapped my boots into Elsa's bindings, and waited for the starting buzzer.

I barely remember the run itself. All I know is, it was fast. Elsa and I were flying, and it felt glorious.

I didn't even realize I'd won until Davey found me later at the bottom of the run. He was screaming in my face about a record-breaking time, and I honestly wasn't sure if he was talking about me or somebody else.

In fact, the reality of my victory didn't truly hit me until the event was over, and Davey was dragging me towards the area where the medal presentation was taking place. They presented the bronze medal to a Swiss rider, and the hometown crowd cheered their hearts out for him, so much so that we could barely hear the recorded national anthem playing as the FIS official placed the medal around his neck. A Norwegian guy won silver, and he got a pretty healthy cheer from the supporters too.

Then, over the slightly crackly public address system, I heard. "And now, the presentation of the gold medal. Please congratulate your FIS World Champion in men's parallel giant slalom. Representing Canada... Victor Okamoto-Nelson!"

For a second or two, I didn't move. Davey nudged my shoulder and urged me forward with a not-so-subtle, "Dude, go!"

I was simultaneously crying and smiling when the official put the medal around my neck. As O Canada played on the speakers, I searched the crowd for Yuri. He was right there in front with Lindsey beside him, and they were holding up a huge Canadian flag between them. I have no idea where they’d gotten it from, but the sight of it and Yuri's brilliant smile ensured that the happy tears didn't stop running down my face until well after the anthem finished playing.

The only way I can describe it is: Best. Day. Ever.

As I was putting my stuff in my suitcase this evening, I kept glancing over at my medals on the nightstand. They were going in mine and Yuri's shared carry-on bag, and I wanted them to be the last things I packed. Not gonna lie, I was tempted to leave them there on the bedside table until morning so I could see them when I woke up, but I ultimately decided not to do that. There'd be plenty of time to admire them when we got home.

After I finished packing, I picked Elsa up from the floor and placed her on the bed. Yuri never used to like it when I put my snowboard on the furniture, especially the bed, but he seemed to change his mind about it after my accident last year. I lay down next to my board and rested my hand on her. Her smooth surface was cool against my palm, and her bright blue and yellow paint job stood out in contrast against the muted beige of the hotel bed's duvet.

"We did it, Elsa," I said aloud. "Sometimes dreams really do come true."

That's how Yuri found me several minutes later when he'd finished enjoying his bath, lying curled on my side and idly stroking my snowboard. I must've looked ridiculous, but he didn't say anything about it. He just climbed onto the enormous bed with me. Wrapped in one of the hotel's luxurious bathrobes and smelling of chocolate from the fancy hotel shampoo, his presence was warm and sweet.

He cuddled against my back and slid an arm over me, trying to be the big spoon despite his tiny size. His voice was soft, "Are you all right?"

"Yeah," I said. "Just thinking."

"Anything you want to share?"

"I'm going to nursing school."

"You are," he agreed.

"I won a gold medal. A World Championship gold medal."

"You did," he acknowledged. "And a bronze one."

"Yeah." I closed my eyes and let myself soak in the comforting feeling of his little body pressed close to mine. "You know what's weird?"

"What?" he said.

"I'm happy about it and I'm proud of myself, but like... I don't know if it's the medals that're important, or something else."

"What do you mean?" he asked.

"You wanted to know what I was thinking about," I said. "I was thinking about Sulani, and how you asked me if I ever had the feeling of having everything I ever wanted."

"I remember."

"I said I didn't, but I think I missed the point of what you were asking."

"Oh?"

"You weren't talking about things, were you? Like going on a trip or getting accepted at university or winning a medal."

"No, I suppose I wasn't," he said. "It was more abstract than that."

"I get it now," I said. "It's not about doing stuff or getting something. It really is more abstract than that. It's like, being satisfied with where you are and with what you've accomplished so far, and just... being content with your life and the way the people around you make you feel."

"Yes," he said. "That's what I meant. I felt that in Sulani. I feel it right this minute."

"Me too," I said. "I felt that way in Sulani too. I'm sorry I didn't understand."

"It's all right," he said. "I'm glad you understand now."

I do get it now, and maybe it's gonna sound strange to say that it took me winning the most important competition of my athletic career to figure it out, but there it is. I'm thrilled about the medals and I can't wait to show them off, but they're not what I value the most. My biggest source of pride is in the fact that I battled my way back from one of the lowest points in my existence to make it to this place. Last January, I thought life as I'd known it was over. For a while, I lost sight of everything; my goals, my hopes and dreams, and even my will to go on. Yet here I am today, a world champion.

A world champion.

And I couldn't have done it without Yuri or my mom and Julian. I couldn't have done it without Sakura, Davey, and all the other friends and family members who love and support me and who never gave up on me. I'm a champion thanks to them, but more importantly I'm happy and I know that I'm valued, safe and loved.

So yeah... I have it all, and I know I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be.

#writing #victorsworldadventures #victor nelson #yuri okamoto #stargazersims

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sweetwolfcupcake · 2 years ago

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Rose Gold: The Undeterred Man

Shades Of Obsession Universe

Rose Gold Masterlist

****

Warning: Yandere Behaviour, Stalking, Non-Consensual Voyeurism

You watched, tapping your foot continuously in a fusion of annoyance and agitation as the two men fixed the 56 inches QLED smart TV against the wall of your room, directly in front of your bed.

Your cousin watched bewildered as she stood by the doorframe, clearly, she had no idea what was going on and you knew not how to explain things to her.

As expected, as soon as the men were out of the apartment, she rushed to your side "What is all this? Why did Jin send this—"

"He's courting me Aerin," you replied curtly, feeling annoyed at the sight of the device already.

"His way of courting? He seems to know nothing much of you (Y/N), flowers were sweet but this…" there was a frown settled between her eyebrows, she knew you.

"He does not even need to court me, I...I told him that I do not see any future with him but he...He insisted on 'courting' me."

You told your cousin what you felt regarding Jin and your future and how he disagreed.

"He sounds serious about you though." she interpreted

"No, he is not. He has women fawning over him at the drop of a hat! Why would he go for me? A simple nobody with nerves and terrible social skills, it does not make sense!" you turned your back on the pricey gift and shook your head.

"You like him but, I see how you look at him." Aerin's words made you turn to her

"Just look at me and Taehyung, we do not share the same 'world' either, we made a tiny world of our own instead," she added shrugging and you wished you could explain to her what you felt about yourself.

She was worth it, she was confident, bold, courageous and you...You did not even love yourself, how were you supposed to love someone else?

You decided to not discuss it any further, but you did text Jin, confronting him about the gift he had sent to you and asking him to take it back. He was, as before, dismissive of your rejection.

As you stared at the blackness of the switched-off device, you could not help but feel guilty and horrible.

Perhaps you led him on unknowingly?

The thought hammered down the guilt deeper into your conscience and the longer you looked at the expensive gift, the more convinced you became. You were no gold digger, you knew it, your cousin knew it. But what about the rest of the people surrounding you, would even Taehyung side with you?

You sighed, the scenarios were troubling enough. So the best thing you could do was to just o to bed, sleep it off for the time being.

------

Jin leaned down as he patiently waited for the screen to connect and finally when it did, he was blessed with the 360-degree sight of your room, the QLED was fixed at just the right angle, and the spy camera was covered along with a micro-mic, he loved your voice after all. It would need professional help to detect it.

His ways were a bit...Unconventional, but he knew that he needed it, how else would he know what you were up to when you got back home? He needed this so much, he wanted to know you better, what could be better than being able to look at you whenever you were in your room? He sighed in delight as he watched your sleeping figure, you must have been so tired, working hard all day, dealing with some controlling, difficult people.

Jin let out a dejected sigh as he was reminded that he was not going to be the shoulder you would fall on for support, not yet at least, in near future, you were going to look up to him with those beautiful eyes of yours, expecting him to help you out, to listen to your rants, your opinions, he would be the one able to hold you, to kiss you...To make you scream his name and fill you up.

Those thoughts alone dried his lips and mouth, it was strange, almost unnerving, the power you had over him, even a single drop of tear from your precious eyes held the ability to bring him to his knees.

He was baffled initially, he had never felt a love so deep before and now, it was too late to turn back, he was in love, he was addicted, he was starved and so Kim Seokjin knew that he had to make you his, at any cost.

He kept his eyes on your sleeping figure, the rise and fall of your chest were enticing, yet he could not have the privilege of the full view of your face, maybe a motion camera in the air conditioner would help? The idea was tempting and air conditioners need some maintenance now and then.

-----

You looked at the man in brand uniform in confusion.

"But, the annual air conditioner maintenance is still a few months away. I even have the papers, wait—"

"I know Ma'am, but the company has this special offer for all its air-conditioner buyers this year, maintenance service and 50% discount on repair, the company is celebrating its 30 years." the man piped in and when you thought of the offer, it was all too tempting to let go

"Um, okay, please come in." albeit hesitantly, you let him in.

----

Most of the BTS members were asleep in their respective rooms, Seokjin was grateful for the fact that almost every member had their personal room in the luxury apartment. As Jin walked out of the shower, refreshed after a long day and almost ready to go to bed, he received a message from the man he had hired to set up a few other cameras in your room, a smile tugged his full lips as soon as he was informed that the task was done.

He almost jumped in front of his laptop, switched it on and had it connected to the cameras fixed in your room. It was so late, he was sure that you would be in deep sleep, you should be, he wanted you healthy and happy after all and he understood the pleasures of complete sleep and relaxing hours.

He had so many thoughts running in his mind but as soon as he accessed the view of your room from a better angle, the camera that was fit just right in the air conditioner, he was met with the most delectable sight of you he had ever had the chance to see.

You, laying so vulnerable, with nothing but a thin chemise that ended right below the hem of your undies, your body sprawled over the sheets like he had visualised a few times, and in reality, he realised, you were even more tempting.

He knew that it would be better if he switched off the laptop, but he had already crossed so many boundaries, watching you in that state was not a sin to him anymore. So with his held breath, Jin watched and listened, your breathing seemed slowed, you were asleep and the way the moonlight fell upon your form, it became all too easy to look at your form, the cameras allowed him to have a close, clear view of your form.

You managed to look lovely even in your sleep, Jin adored you, of course, he did but at the moment, when you looked so tempting with your scantily-dressed form to his display, there was so much the grown man could imagine that went beyond just 'innocent'

And that was apparent to him as he watched your form shifting a bit, allowing your chemise to rise a bit higher and he could only imagine you writhing underneath him, squirming in pleasure with that sweet little mouth of yours open so wide he could just...He let out a slow, pained breath when as he watched you squirm slightly- that was it, he could take no more.

With his eyes tightly shut as he gulped, a vixen, you were a vixen at the moment without even realising so. Jin opened his eyes and to his utter devastation, you had your lips parted wide and breathing quickened in such an enticing manner and as if that was not enough, your back arched, just a little, barely noticeable, but his eyes that were zeroed on your figure could not have missed that. And when your hips began to buckle ever so subtly, slow but sinuous, in lost it.

You were having a fucking wet dream.

He realised as all the blood rushed south in his body and he felt himself hardening.

That was Jin's final straw, he could only bear so much. And not wasting another minute, he rose from his seat and rushed back to the bathroom. He needed a shower.

------

The morning was spent in a hassle, you had woken up late along with a bit of stickiness between your legs, you hardly had any memory of the dreams and you did not bother either, you were already running late and you did not even have the time to grab breakfast.

When you reached your office, your boss threw you a questioning gaze and all you could do was apologize and duck your head before taking your seat, you faintly heard your stomach grumble and prayed that no one else heard that sound and you were saved from another embarrassment in the morning.

Thankfully, it seemed no one did.

By lunchtime, you were famished, it had been uneasy for you, considering you had barely eaten anything the previous night. As soon as you joined in the long queue at the main cafeteria of your workplace, your phone dinged indicating that you had received a message.

You held back the sigh that had bubbled in your throat as soon as it revealed to be from Jin and read -

'I am outside your office, let's have lunch together'

You knew that he had sensed your attempts to avoid him and Jin, you had realised, was a persistent man. You did not want him inside the office building and getting recognised, so without any form of a reply, you made your way outside your office building.

There was no sign of the car Jin would usually drive, but the broad-shouldered man with impressive height could be spotted from afar without any difficulty. As you neared his form, you began to take note of the finer details, how his hair was a bit damp as if he had showered not too long ago- indicating that he had been practising before the spontaneous 'lunch date' as he liked to call it.

He wore spectacles this time, the round frames covered a bit of the facemask he wore to protect his identity, you could already imagine how fine he would be looking. Jin was a remarkable beauty, the handsome man had been in your thought for long enough for you to be able to recognise him even from a distance.

"Ah, there you are Sweet."

His voice was low, but recognisable to you as he greeted you before taking your hand into his and intertwining his fingers with yours.

The action was so simple yet it had managed to make your heart flutter. You gulped as soon as you realised that you needed to keep your boundaries, not fall for him even deeper than you already had.

But your attempts to pull your hand back was met with his silent protest in the form of his firm grip. He did not say anything to you though, he was always such a gentleman to you, to everyone he knew and who knew him.

Everything about him was so charismatic, it was difficult to resist. The realisation also brought forth the reminder how much undeserving you were of Jin, for you, Jin was like the pieces of finest art- meant to be admired from afar, and only from afar.

"You seem lost, Sweetheart," his voice pulled you out of your reverie.

Jin had found a quiet, small restaurant in an alleyway, mostly empty and hence, safer for both of you.

"Uh, nothing." you shrugged your shoulder as your eyes began to skim through the menu, you were famished and you needed to eat.

"You know, you can tell me, I can take care of everything (y/n)." you bit your lip to suppress the frustrated sigh itching to be let out.

Some things were supposed to be dealt with alone, like your insecurities, confusion and self-esteem.

"Have you decided what you yo want?"

You did not want to talk about anything personal, you believed that by distancing yourself, Jin would get the hint.

"Uh-huh, I have. I want to know why have you been avoiding me?"

That was the question you had been dreading and you had not expected Jin to confront you right away.

"Jin...This isn't right..." you began, but your words dried up in your mouth as his eyes met yours.

It was there, the same kind of chill you had felt on the day you had attempted to make it clear to Jin that you were not willing to be with him, even tried to come across as disinterested, but Jin had not been deterred then, and you doubted that doing that again would make any difference. You licked your lips and for a moment, you thought that you saw Jin's burning gaze flick down before resuming to piercing into your eyes again.

"What is not right Love?" he asked dragging the words slightly as if waiting for you to speak whatever he had been anticipating.

But that could be wrong- Jin was such a gentleman, such a good man, you were surely wrong, you kept coaxing yourself before speaking up what you had been wanting to and dreading to simultaneously.

"I...I don't see a future with you Jin, I'm not the woman suited for you. I...I think you must stop pursuing me, I will send it back—"

"Why?"

The single-worded question held the power to cease the flow of words from your mouth immediately and you found yourself freezing.

"Am I not good enough for you (Y/N)?" his voice sounded deeper, perhaps two octaves lower.

Of everything else, you had never expected Jin to seem so...The emotions in his deep, beautiful orbs were a fusion of frustration and...something deeper.

"You do not like the gifts I have been sending you perhaps, how about a few other dates, if not that, how about—"

"No, Jin!"

It was difficult to keep your voice low but your words did come off as a hiss through your gritted teeth.

"That is not what I expect, that is not what I want. If anything, all these...Courting is making me uncomfortable." you lowered your voice immediately, speaking softly- not wanting to be rude.

You were finally able to let out what you had been wanting to- you did not want him to shower you with expensive gifts and attention, you did not want any of that.

Sensing the growing tension in the air between both of you, you stood up and moved away from the table, deciding that leaving at the moment would be in your best interests.

"I am getting late, I shou—"

"Sit."

For a moment, you thought that it was someone else speaking. There was no tenderness or even politeness in Jin's voice, it was sharp and unrelenting and you almost gasped at the foreign tone that you thought could never suit Jin.

But when he looked up to you with sparks flying in his eyes, ready to set your soul ablaze, you realised that perhaps, you did judge the book by its cover.

Jin's mind was burning, he was burning- it was everything, the hurt, the anger, the frustration, but it all hurt, your blatant rejection hurt and he could not take it. He loved you, he wanted the best for you.

But you were so shy, jumping away from his affections, he observed how you would look at him, the blush on your cheeks and now that he could observe you in your bedroom. He never missed the way you would smile, giggle and sometimes whisper 'I'm sorry' before abruptly making ridiculous or common excuses to cut off his call, it was annoying, frustrating initially, but soon Jin could feel the anger building inside him.

Why would you do that to him, to yourself?

You liked him, you clearly had an interest in him, so why?

He could not wrap his head around the matter. What could be stopping you? Or perhaps who? The latter possibility made his blood boil but when he had you in front of him, so close yet so far away and trying to push him away, steeling up your heart.

How easy it had been for you to overlook his love, everything, from your words to actions made him livid, so blind that he even forgot to keep a check on his tone, the way he had when he spoke after taking up the harsh blow of your cruel rejection, how you did not want the gifts and his attention.

You were the only woman he wanted to divert all his attention to, not the desperate women clinging to him or any member of BTS they could for attention, fame and all the other selfish reasons he could come up with, anyone could come up with.

And then there you were, the one woman Jin was mad for who would push him away. He did not care anymore, he wanted you, he loved you and you wanted him too and that was all that mattered to Jin and he was resolute to not let anyone stand in his way- not even you.

He watched as you gulped, frozen at the tone he had used, sighing, he licked his lips and plastered a smile, he could not afford to scare you away, he needed to coax you, be careful, really careful, after all, Jin could not afford to let his little dove fly away in fright. He checked his voice this time.

"Please sit down (Y/N)-nie, we have so much to discuss. Now that..." he trailed off, drumming his fingers softly against the table surface.

His patience was waning, but he had to keep up with your frustrating space of coming around. The knowledge that the attraction was mutual was already working as a balm over the balm of your weak rejection. He watched you sit down, shoulders stiff and eyes still blinking in surprise

"Now that I know what your dislikes are."

Your sweet lips parted to speak up, he had been watching you, observing you with such keen interest that he could even see how your lips quivered a bit. But the waiter arrived at your table, ready to take the order. He ordered for himself before ordering your favourite items from the menu.

You were astounded by his knowledge of your preference for food, but that was not the only thing that surprised you this time though.

"How did you know what I like?"

Your question was nearly a whisper, but Jin had picked up and he smiled, as much as you wanted to believe that it was a kind and sweet smile, like every time you had made yourself believe, this time it was a task to deceive yourself. His smile never reached his eyes, it was almost cold and yet so...beautiful, if you were not nervous enough before, seeing that beautiful yet for some odd reasons, dangerous smile bloom made you nervous enough to feel your feet and palms sweating.

"Oh Sweetheart, I know so much more about you."

****

I guess finally Jin's darker side is becoming apparent now.

Taglist: @illnevertrustmyselfagain @papijiminfeed @bangtanxcoffee @ratherbefangirling @nikkeeee @severephilosopherkid @mak7sstuff

#yandere idol #yandere bts #yandere jin #yandere jin smut #yandere bts smut #yandere jin x reader #jin x reader #shades of obsession #rose gold #bts yandere #obsession #stalking #creepy

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madame-wilsonn · 3 years ago

Text

Just three little words

MASTERLIST

Summary: three times Emmett realized he loved you and the one time he said it

A/N: yes I am not dead and yes this is...well whatever this is! it's late and I should be asleep but I really wanted to finish this and post it. I honestly don't know what to say, I'm not really proud of it and I'm pretty sure I make no sense but I spent too much time to delete and start over! please, tell me what you think! this is my first time writing for this character and I didn't feel very confident about it so I really need feedback to know what I can improve! anyway I will stop rambling now, hope you enjoy and nice reading! ♡

Warnings: mentions of death, it's a bit sad sometimes and also kind of cheesy ig; I didn't have time to proofread and English isn't my first language

You pushed back the blankets from the simple makeshift bed, shivering. It was the first truly cold night of the season, summer had finally left with its warm days and sweet nights to be replaced by a cold, unforgiving fall.

The basement of the abandoned factory you were living in was freezing which may have been a real advantage the last few months but quickly became a hindrance now that the temperatures were lower.

You pulled the sleeves of your cardigan over your hands, nothing Emmett who was laying blankets on the ground.

“What are you doing?” You asked, frowning

He shot you a confused look, not really understanding what you were talking about. Before he could ask you to be more precise, you objected:

“You’re not sleeping on the ground!”

The man rolled his eyes. Ever since he rescued you and allowed you to stay with him, he let you sleep on the bed he had made. At the beginning because you were in a poor condition and then because the remnants of a past chivalry left in him pushed him to offer the more comfortable place to you. And to be fair, even when you weren’t there, he didn’t use that bed often.

“I think I’ll be okay, just go to bed”

You pursed your lips, crossing your arms over your chest.

“No. You’re not sleeping on the ground! You’re going to catch death and we could use the extra blankets!”

Emmett thought about it for a moment. He didn’t really want to share the same bed as you, it felt awfully wrong to him. But at the same time, you were right. You would both sleep a lot more better and avoid a certain fever if you shared the bed.

Defeated, he sighed, grabbing the plaids and covers from the ground to add them to the other pile of blankets. You took the far left side of the bed, pushing yourself for him to have enough space to lie down as well.

Although it was a bit narrow, there was still place for the both of you without having to be glued to the other’s side.

You sighed happily as the blankets finally seemed enough to keep you warm. You wished Emmett a goodnight and within a few minutes, you had reached a peaceful slumber. He tried to do the same, close his eyes and try to find that undisturbed state. However, he would always end up staring at the ceiling again.

He listened to your regular breathing, glad that you could at least get some rest. Some nights it was impossible for you to sleep and during those nights, you would both stay awake, trying to pass time. You had taught him a few card games which he loved and spent some rare nights where you would just talk. There weren’t many moments where Emmett wasn’t constantly on his guard, tensed or anxious but most of the times he felt slightly relaxed, it was around you.

He remembered the day you found his hiding place. You had to run away from your last home, in the middle of summer. You had wandered in the forest for days, slightly dehydrated and exhausted from the lack of sleep.

You had managed to find the building and in your hazy state, triggered the few traps Emmett had placed. His initial reaction was to make you leave or, if it came to it, use his gun against you.

He then saw the condition you were in, half of him thought it wasn’t his problem and he shouldn’t be caring for a complete stranger but the other half, the more merciful one chose to help you.

He was glad he let you in, he found some sort of peace in your presence. You helped him in more ways he could have imagined and probably even more than you thought you did.

As the hours passed, Emmett witnessed a slow and painful decrease of the warmth in the basement. He noticed the blankets covering you had fallen a bit, making you shiver. He extended his arm to pull them back over your body but you turned around, facing him. Your hand came to rest against his chest, your head nuzzling closer to him.

The man froze, surprised as he felt the warmth emanating from your body shield him from the low temperature around. Hesitantly, he looked down, making sure you were still asleep before sighing. It was a strange sensation, a rather comforting one.

He had had an increasing lack of human touch as the world slowly crumbled around him, turning into this hellish, completely muted place. And he had been too busy thinking about his family’s then his wife’s and finally his own survival, trying to keep his head out of the water that he didn’t realize how cold and forlorn he felt inside.

Your gesture, albeit an involuntary one, brought him a sense of that long lost affection he clearly craved. It felt good to have a…what were you? A friend? The word didn’t feel strong enough to qualify the relationship he had with you.

You were more than a simple “friend”, you were…kind and cheerful and caring. You were the one he could trust, the one he knew he could rely on. You made him want to fight and stay strong long enough to give you more than this life, you made his heart stop and his stomach flutter…and Emmett may not have had many friends but he knew for sure friends didn’t do that. He thought about it for a moment. Maybe he needed to be a little bit daring to find the answer to that question? His eyes fell on your sleeping form and he breathed in deeply. He passed an arm around you, almost timidly and brought you even closer than before. You snuggled up against him, his heart growing twice its size in his chest. Emmett closed his eyes again, feeling more tranquil than ever and finally, as he held your body against his, sleep came to him.

“It’s going to sting” you announced in a soft voice as you pressed the compress against the arch of his right eyebrow

Emmett winced a little which earned him an apologetic smile from you.

“I’m sorry” he muttered after a beat of silence, adding at your confused look “for the groceries”

After leaving this morning to go to the store for supplies but on his way back, he got ambushed. Some survivors hiding in the forest attacked him, attracting the creatures with the noise. Thankfully he had managed to escape almost unscathed before one of the monsters got to him. However, the bags of food and first aid supplies had been lost in the fight.

“Don’t apologize for that, okay? I’m just happy you made it out alive.”

The man sighed, staring at his hands. Over the last few months of you living with him, he had slowly began to care about you, taking it as his responsibility to protect you. Having this urge to make sure nothing happened to you, he only wanted your safety and for you to be as happy and healthy as possible as it was in this world. Maybe it was the fact that he had already lost too much to now lose you as well. Maybe it was the desire to have someone to protect again. Regardless, what happened a few hours earlier only made him feel like he had failed at taking care of you.

“I mean it! We can always go back for the supplies, your life is definitely worth more than a couple of cans to me.”

The man scoffed but still felt his heart miss a beat at your words. You finished patching him up, putting away the first aid kit. However, you didn’t move from your place, you stood between his legs, your soft eyes analyzing his features.

Emmett gazed at you, his face warming up and he almost rolled his eyes at his reaction. He felt like some teenage boy with his silly crush. He was convinced it was insignificant, something that would go away with time. It was a fairly normal reaction, you were the first person he was actually interacting with in the last few months and his mind just associated this with some sort of crush…nothing more. Just a crush.

But Emmett’s breath hitched in his throat as your fingers brushed away the few strands of hair falling over his brow. They trailed all the way down to his right cheek and his beard.

The gesture almost felt ticklish but the man found himself needing for more. Your fingers were so soft…how was he only realizing it now? Your touch provoked a strange sensation in his stomach, his heart began thumping faster, louder, so loud he was convinced you could hear it as well. Nevertheless, you just kept your eyes on him, an innocent smile adorning your face.

And as if it wasn’t enough, you slowly leaned in, letting your lips rest on his cheek for a moment. It was gentle, comforting and a part of him never wanted you to pull away. For just a few seconds, Emmett was convinced he could live just fine if you could kiss him and never stop. The man closed his eyes trying to etch the feeling of your impossibly soft lips against his skin, capture the moment before it disappears, leaving him cold and empty and dying for just another crumb of your intoxicating tenderness.

You finally leaned back, that damned smile still taunting him as you whispered:

“You should lay down, you need to rest”

Emmett was speechless, incapable of forming any coherent words so he just nodded. He lay on the bed as you quietly left the room, his heart still pounding in his chest. The man sighed hopelessly, closing his eyes.

It was definitely not just a crush.

It was a lovely evening. The sun was setting, covering the scenery in hues of warm pink and orange, children were running around, laughing and carefree while their parents chatted away. No whispering, no cautiousness.

You sat on a little bench, Evelyn talking to you about Marcus’ upcoming birthday. It was the first one he would celebrate ever since they left the “other world” like people called it. You promised you would help, it was a special occasion.

On the other side of the bench, Emmett was staring at the camp fire in front of him. He hated these little gatherings. He had absolutely nothing against the people, they had welcomed him on the island, offering him a house and safety. Regardless, he would still rather spend his evening on the couch, reading a nice book with you cuddled up against him.

But your neighbor, Agnes, had insisted, so much you found yourself unable to turn her down. And you had ran out of excuses you could give to avoid the barbecue.

You knew how much Emmett hated this. It was crowded and noisy and people were making small talks. He still agreed to come, you promised you wouldn’t stay too long and be home soon enough to enjoy the rest of the night together.

Evelyn excused herself to check on her children and you turned towards him. He was looking at the kids playing, his eyes lost as he probably tried to remember what his sons’ laughs soundedlike.

He didn’t mention his family a lot, only once when he told you what had happened to them. It was back in the factory, one night when neither of you could find enough peace to sleep. You told him about your old town, your loved ones, your friends, the high school you went to and after being quiet for a while, he mentioned his kids and his wife. You had already guessed he lost his family with all the drawings but you were considerate enough to not bring it up.

You didn’t know that but Emmett felt good about talking to someone who understood his pain. Until that night, he had tried to bury it, keep going because he couldn’t allow himself to grieve. The sorrow was too great, he couldn’t handle it, not if he wanted to survive. But he realized as he heard you speak about your life that trying to forget about his grief was trying to forget about the love he had for them. So he shared some moments of his old life as well: Luke’s passion for baseball, movie nights and afternoons in the park, he talked about having to carry them back to their room because they’d fall asleep in the car, how he used to carry his youngest, Noah on his back when they would go hiking and how his wife always made up the best bedtime stories.

Now, he was looking at those children, wondering what his would be doing if they had the chance to come here, his heart aching for the family he lost when it had been his job to protect them.

Noticing how quiet and absentminded he seemed, you gently took his hand in yours, giving it a light squeeze. He broke out from his thoughts, turning to look at you and you offered him a kind smile.

You reached out to caress his cheek with your free hand, your delicate fingers brushing away his pain.

“Let’s go home, yeah?”

You got up, your hand still holding his. Before leaving, you had the courtesy to tell Agnes you were feeling a bit sick and needed to go home which she thankfully didn’t question.

You walked on the silent roads that lead to your house, never letting go of Emmett. He needed to feel your support, to know he wasn’t alone anymore and could share some of his grief with you.

As you passes the doorstep, you let out a content “ah, home sweet home” before going to sit on the couch. Emmett joined you and you pulled his arm so he could rest his head on your lap. Your fingers began to thread through his hair in a soothing motion.

“They’re proud of you, Emmett.” you broke the silence “I know that from wherever they are, they’re proud of you”

The man nodded, clenching his jaw as you leant in to kiss his temple.

He couldn’t say it out loud but he was grateful for you. And he knew you understood which only made him care more about you. He grabbed the hand you had around him and dropped a kiss over your knuckles, silently acknowledging your comfort. He missed his family terribly, he would have wanted to discover this new world with them but as much as he had lost, he had also found you along the way. You were his second chance to find some sort of bliss, to find harmony and peace.

To find love.

The timid sun rays filtered through the white curtains in the room, the delicate light brushing over your face. Your eyes fluttered open, meeting the clean and simple bedroom.

Your first instinct was to turn around but you only found a cold, empty spot besides yours. You knew Emmett wasn’t working today but he always woke up earlier than you did so it wasn’t unusual for him to get up before you.

After taking a few minutes to enjoy the feathery soft mattress underneath you, trying to remember the dream you had had. Finally, you decided to push back the covers, passing a tired hand over your face as you slipped out of the coziness of your bed.

You walked through the small, quiet house, making your way to the modest living room.

Still nowhere to be seen. You guessed he left to take a walk on the island but as you approached your kitchen to prepare some breakfast, you saw him sitting on the porch steps, his back towards you.

A smile found its place on your face and, after grabbing the plaid laying on your couch, you opened the front door to join him.

He was so lost in his own thoughts he only noticed you when you placed the blanket around his shoulders, softly greeting him.

"‘morning” he answered as you sat down next to him.

Almost instantly, he wrapped an arm around your shoulders so you could be under the blanket as well. Your head came to rest against him and you sighed pleasantly.

Neither of you spoke, it wasn’t really necessary. Your relationship…or whatever it was between you was built on silent agreements, quiet marks of affection and unspoken kisses.

It was probably what Emmett loved the most about it. Yes, loved. Because as difficult as it had been to admit it to himself, Emmett was finally ready to accept he loved you.

But it was actually not as painful as he thought, quite the opposite. He didn’t feel the heart wrenching loneliness anymore, the need to survive but at the same time the wish to just wait for death to come for him and free him from his torments.

No, Emmett was…happy. In the way he could wake up in the middle of the night and find you next to him, the way he could simply kiss your forehead or your cheek or even your lips when he wanted to, the way he could feel your loving touch slowly heal him, piece by piece. For each moment by your side was one more reason he was glad he never gave up.

The only obstacle for him now was that he may have accepted his feelings for you but he had yet to voice them. And that was terrifying him.

He lived in a world full of deadly creatures but the thought of you rejecting him seemed a whole new kind of worse. Of course, he felt terribly stupid for that but he couldn’t help the fear that crept up on him every time he wanted to say it.

And it was simple.

Just three little words.

I. Love. You.

But the idea of you not saying it back left him wordless.

He knew you cared about him, he knew that whatever was going on between you two was miles away from friendship but did you really shared the same feeling he did?

Before his thoughts could swallow him in their dark, profound abyss, Emmett felt your lips against his collarbone.

“Everything alright?” you murmured against his skin.

He lovingly caressed your hair, his heart pounding against his chest as he swallowed thickly. He was about to reply a simple “yes, everything is good” but he chose to be daring again, just like that first night in the factory.

“I love you.” He blurted out

And then silence.

An unbearable, suffocating silence as you heard his confession.

Emmett felt his cheeks heat up, shame and a different kind of hurt he had been used to rushing through his body. He was about to get up, leave and maybe act as if nothing happened. Maybe you could just go back to how things were, maybe nothing had to change.

You pushed yourself away from him. Fear overtook his body and the dread of losing you because of those stupid words, because of his own folly made him dizzy. He was about to mutter some excuse, try to get out of this terrible situation because he couldn’t handle your look of utter disbelief, your lips slightly open in shock. He couldn’t endure your lack of response and your seemingly inability to say the words back.

But to his own surprise, he felt your arms wrap themselves around his neck. You pulled him close to you as relief washed over Emmett. He embraced you back, a pure sense of happiness and contentment overwhelming him.

You leaned back, just enough to look at him, your hands cupping his face and you smiled. It was so beautiful, so radiant he was sure the image was now engraved in his memory. And then you said those three little words back:

“I love you too, Emmett”

#emmett x reader #emmett #a quiet place ii #a quiet place #anna’s fics

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nctsworld · 4 years ago

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two nights, one you

✩‌ jaemin ‌x‌ ‌reader‌ ‌|‌ fuckboy!jaemin | strangers (who f*ck) to (brief) enemies to lovers | ‌10.9k

SUMMARY‌ ‌⇾‌ a last-minute one night stand gone awry is extended into two nights when you’re snowed in at the cute (but rude) stranger’s apartment on christmas eve. [loosely based on the movie, two night stand] // part of the x-mas in ncity collection GENRES ⇾ crack | smut | fluff WARNINGS‌ ‌⇾‌ ‌lots of bickering and dialogue, smut, oral s*x (f and m receiving), fingering, mentions of alcohol/drinking, swearing, bit of angst before the end, jaemin’s an asshole... or is he? RATING‌ ‌⇾‌ explicit TAGLIST ⇾‌ @infnteen

AUTHOR’S NOTE ⇾ it’s late (and long fsldkm), srysry but here it is! i hope the humour comes out in this and look away if falls flat zzz fingers crossed that i can finish the last two installments for this collection asap!

⇾ gif created by me, please don’t repost or share without credit!

Maybe it’s because it’s the evening of Christmas Eve Eve and you’re feeling more lonely than usual.

Maybe it’s due to the two glasses of wine you guzzled down in the span of fifteen minutes that get you buzzed.

Maybe it’s your prominent six-month dry spell and you’re in desperate need for some much needed rain in your drought.

Or maybe it’s just pure impulsiveness.

Regardless of the reasons, you’re aiming to get laid tonight.

It’s 9:45pm as you make the rounds on Tinder. You’ve used it in the past, searching for a relationship in vain, but haven’t used it much since you broke up with your last partner. Bringing the app alive again, you’re already bombarded by distasteful messages, off-putting one-liners and jokes, and swiping left more than you’d like.

You haven’t had a one-night stand before, but isn’t there anyone on here that is just a little bit attractive, nearby where you are, around your age, and is somewhat chivalrous about the topic besides saying DTF? Maybe you need to lower your standards if you want to get dicked down tonight.

But then, you land on him.

One Na Jaemin, 20 years old, and only four miles away from you.

Scrolling through his profile pictures and Instagram feed, you assume that he’s into photography, is on the athletic side from the various hobbies he partakes in, and he must be at least half-aware of his beauty because there’s the occasional pic that shows off his lean, toned arms, which, if you can be frank, is more flattering than the shirtless ones you constantly see. Oh, and he attends the same university as you.

The cherry on top? His bio is simple and upfront:

“Not up for anything serious, but always down for a good time ;)”

You swipe right without hesitation.

“It’s a Match!” flashes instantly at you. Your mouth swings open in disbelief.

Usually, you’d wait for your matches to message you and play hard-to-get, but not tonight. Tonight, you’re initiating and leading all the conversations, completely driven by your thirst.

Messaging Jaemin is a breeze. He types with more than half a brain, and he flirts, but it isn’t overwhelming or repulsive. Segueing the current topic, you drag your bottom lip upward as you send the following message:

so, hypothetically... if one were to have good time with you would tonight work?

Not even twenty seconds later and he replies with:

-wow, dont you go straight to the point -im impressed -but yeah -tonight works ;)

He’s quick to send his address.

-let me know when ur here and ill come get you out front!

Smacking your lips together, you squeal to yourself in the comfort of your home, excited to meet with him, but then a thought hangs over you—this feels a little too good to be true. Horrible scenarios run through your head, so your fingers dash across your phone’s keyboard:

tbh i haven’t really done this b4 so im kinda new to this is it ok if we video call or smth? gotta make sure you’re real and not a serial killer i’m sure you understand 😛

-for sure for sure -totally get it -ive had my fair share of fake girls and serial killers so i feel u 😛

Grateful for his consideration, you rush to rearrange your hair after you send him a Zoom link, hoping you look decent enough to not have him back off from his initial offer. He appears in the video call on his phone with the front-facing camera on a few seconds after you connect.

“Hi,” you chirp.

A corner of his mouth lifts. “Hey.”

Okay, he’s definitely cuter in real-time than in his pictures.

“You know, I’m not gonna lie, but I lowkey expected to see a dick or something,” you joke in an attempt to dispel your nervousness.

“Same,” he chuckles, running a hand through his black hair.

Oh God, he’s not just cute—he’s devastatingly gorgeous.

“So, this is my place...”

Jaemin moves around with his apartment in the background, revealing his living room first. Envy prods you as you note the brick walls, high ceiling windows, and well-appointed furnishings.

Recalling his address, you ask, “How’d you get a place in the heart of the city?”

“Lucked out,” he shrugs. His phone shakes a bit as he’s still moving. “My friend slash roommate—who is at his girlfriend’s place tonight, so we have the place all to ourselves—his parents own the condo and they gave me a friend discount on the rent.”

He finally stands in one place and turns the light on to reveal a room. “And this is my bedroom.”

Nothing out of the ordinary. A desk table with a gaming set-up, in tow with a gamer chair, and a decently-sized bed beside a nightstand.

“Oh, and here’s my closet.” Jaemin’s on the move again as he opens his closet doors. “Just to make sure you don’t think I hide the skins of my past one-nighters in here.”

A bubbly laugh rises from you. “Okay, I didn’t think of that before, but now you’ve planted the seed in my head. Maybe you hide them in the other rooms.”

“Nah, my roommate would kill me if I did.”

Both of you laugh in unison, and you bob your head with puffed cheeks.

“Okay, it all seems very promising. I’m going to get ready and I’ll guess I’ll see you in a bit, Jaemin.”

“Sounds good,” Jaemin nods, then winks. Although you’re sitting down, he’s still able to get you weak in the knees. “See you soon.”

You end the call and rush to bundle up for the snow starting to come down outside. A twenty-minute train ride later, you’re at the front door of a rustic, industrial apartment complex. After informing Jaemin you’re outside, you glance up at the snowflakes falling from the dark pink-grey sky, anticipating for what comes next.

Sex with a hot guy, what can go wrong?

So, you must’ve jinxed it because the sex is...

Unsatisfying. Finished faster than you’d like it to be. Sadly, overall disappointing. If you had to rate it, three out of five stars, at best.

But hey, he came, and you sort of did, and it wasn’t the worst sex you’ve ever had. It half-quenched your dry spell.

And enough happened that it tired you out, leaving you passed out in the handsome stranger’s bed until morning.

In the morning, your eyes slowly flicker, unused to the foreign, sweet scent engulfing you in your bed. Correction: Jaemin’s bed.

Your eyes flicker faster as you glance through the almost wall-sized window. The snow hasn’t let up from last night. On the contrary, it seems like it’s snowing non-stop. You groan at the thought of going home in this weather.

The bed is without Jaemin’s presence as you reach for your phone on the nightstand. 10:36AM and a few notifications greet you. You rub your eyes and start combing through them, rising upward to sit up on the bed.

“Morning. You’re finally up.”

Peering up from your device, Jaemin’s standing by the door with folded arms. His plain sweater and sweatpants match the colour of his hair. The dazzling smile he gives is so contagious, you’re not even conscious of catching one too.

“Out you go.”

You blink.

Once, twice, and then you tilt your head as you stare blankly at him, uncertain if you heard him correctly.

After a few moments, because you’re not moving an inch, his smile dissipates and he cocks an eyebrow in expectancy. A serious expression rolls over his face.

Suddenly, Jaemin strolls to the side of the bed and hitches his thumb towards the door.

You definitely heard him right.

And he’s dead-serious.

You replay the video call from last night, dissecting how you thought he was nice and funny and—

Realization dawns on you.

Why would you expect anything more from a two-faced fuck boy?

Still awestruck by the situation, you’re still solid as a statue, so Jaemin takes matters into his own hands and grasps you by your elbow, casually dragging you from his bed like he’s taking out the trash.

“What the fuck?!” you screech.

“C’mon, let’s go. Out out.”

“My clothes, though!” you protest in the middle of the hallway. He sighs in frustration, scurries to the bedroom, and returns with a small pile in his arms, then continues to drag you to the front door.

“Are you always this pleasant with your guests the morning after?” you rage, putting on the rest of your clothes by the door. “You don’t even have the decency to offer me tea or coffee?”

“This was a one-night stand, not a bed and breakfast, sunshine,” he says as he watches you put your shoes on. He’s folding his arms again and leaning against the wall, his attitude dripping with smug. If he wasn’t a stranger, you’d punch it off his face. “You weren’t kidding when you said you were new to this, huh?”

“What the fuck is that supposed to mean?!”

“It means you’re a borderline virgin who needs to toodle-loo, get going and gone because you’re overstaying your welcome as we speak.”

Finishing putting on your coat, you’re fuming as your jaw hangs at the personal jab over your skills in bed. Jaemin swings the door open and shoves you through it.

“But I’ll admit, it was still nice having sex with you!” he chimes with a sickening grin and a hand on the door.

“Aw, thanks asshole, wish I could say the same,” you sarcastically reply, resting a palm upon your chest.

He scoffs. “From what I heard last night, I think I can confidently say that you had a great time.”

Flashbacks replay in your mind of your screaming fest from underneath him. Little did Jaemin actually know—

“You know, for someone who I assume has many one-night stands,” you spit with squinted eyes. “I’m surprised you can’t tell when girls fake it.”

You must’ve hit a sore spot because he grinds his teeth and you could almost see the steam coming out of his ears.

Oh yeah, you’re definitely the winner in this fight.

“Okay, you know what, Merry Christmas and fuck you. Have a great life!”

“Fuck you, dickface. Wishing you a miserable Christmas!”

With a bitter smile, you flip him off as he slams the door in your face.

Carrying a basket filled with dirty clothes, Jaemin’s on the way down to the laundry room in the basement of his apartment with his shoulder scrunched up, squeezing his phone to his ear.

“Bro, she had the audacity to say that I didn’t make her come when she was screaming my God damn ear off—”

As he steps down the short flight of stairs and passes by the foyer area by the main entrance to the building, he notices you’re still here.

“Shit, uh, Jeno,” he mumbles. “I’m gonna have to call you back.”

He stuffs his phone into the pocket of his sweats and calls out to you as he strides closer. “Are you resorting to stalking me by my front door now?”

With crossed arms, you peer over your shoulder, eyes full of bitterness.

“Like I wanna be anywhere near you right now,” you grumble. You jerk your head towards the thick, wooden door. “It’s jammed from the snow.”

The laundry carrier shakes his head and places the basket onto the floor. “A little snow never hurt anyone. You’re probably just too weak.”

Stepping aside and holding out an arm, you signal for him to give it a try.

Jaemin twists the handle and, lo and behold, it doesn’t open. His forehead crinkles as he tries again and again, using more force each time.

Glancing through one of the partially frosted windows adjacent to the sides of the door, he notices the snow has piled enormously high, almost to the height of his chest.

“Well, shit.”

Reluctantly, Jaemin brings you back to his apartment. You’re technically his guest and if he left you in the foyer to freeze, trouble would surely come his way, whether it be in the form of his landlords (also known as his roommate’s parents) or the police.

Without a word, he settles a spoon in a bowl, a carton of milk, and a box of cereal onto the small kitchen table.

At first, you stare at it venomously in rejection, thinking you can easily last a day without any hand-outs from this son of a bitch, but your stomach roars ferociously three seconds later.

As you chew across from him, you enjoy the company of your phone over him, while he does the same but with a cup of coffee in hand.

After finishing your food, you adamantly place your phone down and lean back into the chair, boring holes into his head.

“Why are you such an asshole?” you seethe observantly.

“Why are you such a bitch?” he retorts, not pulling his gaze away from his phone.

“Because you started it,” you say slowly, stating the obvious.

“No, you.”

You sigh defeatedly at his childish behaviour. The weather apps predict the snow will (hopefully) die down by tomorrow morning, thus you’re officially stuck with him for the next twenty-four hours or so. Your hands rake through your hair.

“Whether we like it or not, the snow isn’t going away until tomorrow. Merry Christmas Eve to us, I guess.”

He’s still glued to his phone. You exhale another sigh.

“Since we’re not getting out of this until then, can we just...” You soften your voice. “Start over?”

His eyes are still on the screen, but from the way his shoulders tense and how he stops scrolling, you know he’s considering your proposition.

“At least call a stalemate over this.” You drift your hand in the air, gesturing between you and him.

Blowing out air and shaking his head, he rests his phone onto the table.

“Fine.”

He crosses his arms, imitating you, and the two of you sit there, staring at each other in a long silence.

One minute, to be exact.

You’re the one to break the silence game by running your hands over your face, letting out a hybrid of a groan and laugh.

“God, the fact that we had sex makes this kinda awkward, huh?”

Jaemin’s exterior melts slightly, letting out a snicker. He shrugs, “Then let’s just pretend that we didn’t have sex.”

“We can’t just pretend that we didn’t have sex,” you say, holding two upturned palms near your face.

“We did it, it’s done. I’ve seen your penis, you kicked me out, and you labelled me a prude—” You dart a finger towards him. “—which I am far from, by the way. All of those are pretty huge things.”

One of the corners of his mouth raises high. “Are you saying my penis is huge?”

“No, the implication of said penis is huge. Wipe that smirk off your face.”

He stretches an arm, holding an imaginary microphone to your face. “Do you deny that my penis is huge?”

Rolling your eyes, you swat his fist away. “What am I, on trial here?”

“Do you plead the fifth then?”

Annoyed, you roll your eyes again. Why do you get the feeling that you’re probably going to be doing this a lot more today? Another feeling tells you that if you don’t answer his question, he’ll probably pester you until you do.

You tilt your head side to side. “It’s... decently sized.”

“Bigger or smaller than average?”

“Perfect...” His eyes light up. “...ly average.” And a frown rolls over.

He squints his eyes accusingly at your sneer. “Are you lying like you did before about faking it?”

You scoff. “I wasn’t lying about faking it, and I’m not lying now about your average sized dick.”

Jaemin releases a disgruntled grumble and lifts his cup to his face. You notice he likes to take his coffee black and bitter, presumably like his heart.

“So, Miss I’m-Not-A-Prude-and-I’ve-Definitely-Had-Sex-Before.” His eyebrows perk up on the word definitely. “What’s your story? Why the last minute one-night stand?”

Shrugging your shoulders to your ears, you reply, “Haven’t had sex in a while.”

“When’s the last time you had sex?” he asks mid-sip.

“Half a year ago,” you respond nonchalantly, perching your chin into your palms.

Jaemin immediately chokes, almost spraying the coffee through his nose.

“Half a year?!” he gasps. It takes him a few hits to his chest to dispel the coughing. “Six months?!”

“Wow, you can count!” you exclaim in a condescending tone. You change the position of your hands so that your chin is now atop of the back of your curled fingers and tilt your head. “Can you also spell?”

“As a premed student, I can assure you that I am capable of doing both,” he says with a slight strain due to the coughing fit. The humble brag brings on another eye roll. Of course he’s a premed student with the attitude he wears.

“It’s just—” He clears his throat and swallows the last bit of coffee stuck in his windpipe. “—The last time I had a dry spell was for like, a month, tops.”

So the fuckboy gets laid way more on the daily than you expect. You’re torn between being envious over how much action he gets in comparison to you, or remorseful, since you’re now just one of the many notches on his bedpost.

No matter, sarcasm is always the best defence mechanism.

“Good for you, Jaemin. I’m sure you’re very proud of that.”

There’s an awkward beat. His head hangs for a moment while his thumbs stroke the sides of his cup. A strange pinch of guilt occurs. Did you overstep an unspoken line? But then he drags himself back to reality in a heartbeat.

Jaemin brings the cup to his mouth again, mumbling, “At least the sex on your part makes more sense now; you’re rusty as fuck.”

Completely aware of what he said, you trash your guilt entirely and narrow your eyes. “What did you just say?”

Following a long sip, he hums, “Mmm, nothing.” Soon after, he stands up with his cup.

“I’m gonna go game now. Feel free to watch Netflix on the TV and stay in the living room.”

As if you had anywhere else to go...

He begins to walk towards his room as you mutter under your breath, “I’m not a dog.”

“Says the bitch,” he pipes up, taking you by surprise.

“Thought we had a stalemate?!” you shout, leaning your head forward as you watch him entering his room.

“Doesn’t mean we’re on peaceful terms!” he sing-shouts.

The flinging of the closed door echoes throughout the apartment.

Regret surges through you. You just had to choose a fuckboy fluent in assholery and end up incidentally being isolated with him during a snow storm on Christmas Eve.

You wonder if you can handle being around him for the next twenty-four hours without killing him first.

During the afternoon, you’re on the living room couch, playing a show as mostly background noise while you’re on your phone. At one point, your phone unsurprisingly begins to die and you tread over to Jaemin’s door to ask for a charger and if you can also take a shower. He’s still annoyed by your existence, but at least he hands you a charger and lets you know where the extra towels are.

Stepping into the living room with the towel in your hand as you dry your hair off, you peer out the large living room window and see nothing but white engulfing the streets and buildings as far as the eye can see.

You pray the snow will eventually stop as soon as possible so you can head back home.

By the middle of the afternoon, Jaemin emerges from his bedroom and shocks you by plopping down on the opposite end of the living room couch from where you’re sitting.

“Bored?” you ask, eyes fixated on the TV screen.

“Nope,” he replies, popping the p as he says it. His slings his arm around the top of the couch.

“Gotta keep an eye on you in case you do something.” Turning away from the screen, he faces you and motions circles with his hand. “You’ve got a little crazy in you, I can feel it.”

You quickly glance over at him, but try to refocus on the TV. “Need I remind you that you’re the crazy one, dragging me out of the apartment right as I woke up.”

That compels him to turn his whole body towards you. “Well, you’re the one who wanted a last-minute one-night stand.”

You match his stance. “As if I’m the first girl in your bed to stay in the morning?”

“Actually, yeah.” He aggressively tilts his head to one side. “Most girls leave before I even get up. The other percentage don’t fight me when I ask for them to go, so it looks like you’re the odd one out.”

You press your lips together, refusing to admit that maybe he has a point, under the assumption that he’s telling the truth.

Jaemin twists his body back to the screen and adds, “I make it very clear on my profile that I don’t do morning afters, sweetheart.”

And you agree that his profile is clear about his intentions, but that doesn’t mean you can condone his shitty behaviour.

“Well, sorry that I expected just an ounce of respect instead of getting kicked to the curb after you stuck your dick in me,” you grumble, shifting back to the show and crossing your arms.

“Morning afters lead to attachments, and attachments lead to feelings, and feelings lead to relationships,” he says the string of words clinically, as if it’s a mantra that he lives by.

Your eyebrows knit together as you whip your head towards him once more, studying him.

“And what’s so wrong with that?”

Deliberately averting your gaze, Jaemin grates his tongue between his teeth, a slight tsk audibly heard, and his chin juts out. There’s definitely a story behind his ways. He huffs and changes the subject.

“Seriously?” He holds a hand out. “You’re watching this trashy show?”

Squinting your eyes at him, you could probably interrogate him further, but you decide otherwise.

“It may be trashy,” you concur, looking at the TV. “But it’s my trashy comfort show.”

Following an over-the-top acted out scene between the show’s main love interests, Jaemin shoots up from the couch.

“Yeah, no, I can’t handle this. Can we either put on something else or game or something?”

“Why don’t you go back to your room to game, Mr. I’m-Not-Bored?”

“Like I said, I gotta keep an eye on you,” he says while bending over in front of the TV, already setting up the Playstation. He tosses you a controller as he strides to his side of the couch again.

He mumbles to himself, “Need to make sure you don’t go crazy from the lack of human interaction.”

Either Jaemin is selfish and only looking out for himself, or he wants to make sure you’re not feeling lonely in a stranger’s home.

Likely the first reason, you deduce—because why would a guy like Jaemin care about a mere one-night stand?

Admittedly, you’re not the best at games, especially at fighting ones. You can comprehend the move lists, but you like to live by button smashing the controller and repeating moves over and over.

So it’s hilarious when you beat Jaemin every round with your surprisingly fruitful technique.

“Okay, this is bullshit,” Jaemin complains, sticking his tongue out in irritation. His ass is currently being handed to him on a plate again since you’re almost done killing his character off. “You must be lying to me; you have to be a pro player or some shit.”

Jaemin’s health bar is dangerously low as your character jabs his with a sword. He winces out loud and you snicker.

“Why do you think I always lie about everything?! Dude, you have serious trust issues,” you joke before you steal the opportunity to slice his character. One more hit and he’s done for.

“I do not! I just—nooo!”

You rise to your feet and pump your arms in the air, turning in circles in joy over yet another win.

Sulking, Jaemin eyes your little dance from his end on the couch, but as he watches you more, a feeling balloons in his chest. Something he hasn’t felt in a long time.

Finally coming down from your post-win high, you spot an emerging grin from the corner of your eye, making you pause.

“What?” you eye him suspiciously.

Your suspicion pops the sensation in his chest and, like a fish out of water, his eyes widen and his grin melts away.

“Nothing, uhm.” He ruffles his eyebrows and palms the back of his neck, quickly facing the TV. “Let’s go one more round and then we can switch to another game—”

Suddenly, the TV and surrounding lights switch off. Both of you waver your eyes, anticipating for them to come back on, but they unfortunately don’t.

Jaemin rushes over to the window. When he swivels his head towards you, his face darkens.

“Looks like it’s at least the whole block. The streetlights are out too.”

Without another word, he dashes to the linen closet and brings back several blankets. He calmly explains that there won’t be heat since it’s connected to the electricity, so it’d be best to keep warm with the extra layers.

Not wanting to scare you, he doesn’t add the fact that due to the huge windows in the apartment, more unnecessary cold air will come in, but you’re already cognizant of it from your own logic and since the remaining heat dissolves rapidly.

You groan and retreat into the massive blanket over your shoulders, turtling your head.

You can’t believe you’re going to fucking die in this asshole’s apartment on Christmas Eve.

On the ends of the couch in your makeshift blanket jackets, both of you attend to your phones for a while.

From what people and the news outlets are saying, it’s not just the block, but the whole city grid is out. You frantically text your friends, giving updates on how you are and half-jokingly telling them that you’re going to die with your dreadful one-night stand. Some time passes and Jaemin tosses his phone off to one side.

“Well, since there’s nothing else to do and we should probably conserve our phone batteries—” You glance up at him from your phone and pout. Slowly nodding in agreement, you toss it aside too. “—why don’t we play a game of ‘I’ll-Give-You-Pointers-on-How-to-be-Better-in-Bed’?”

A smile burgeons on his irritatingly handsome face and your eyes roll. At this point, you wonder if the reaction is conditioned into you. “It’ll be my early Christmas gift to you.”

“Wow, so thoughtful, how could I ever thank you?” You drag the blanket closer to your chest in false gratitude.

You think for a serious moment if you really want to go through with this. Hearing Jaemin run his mouth on you unwarranted is already painful, but to give him the go-ahead to do so? Especially criticizing your skills in bed?

You blow out a sigh, noting the slightly visible cloud. You’re grateful Jaemin has thick, downy blankets.

Well, if you’re going to die, may as well know what went wrong, right?

“Fine, but if we’re playing this game, we have to say everything honestly and take the criticism we get.” You point a stern finger. “No rebuttals, just acceptance.”

“Wait.” Jaemin crinkles his face in genuine confusion as his hand peeks out from his blanket.

“You have things to criticize about me in bed?”

Your lips tremble before you burst into laughter. Displeasure is on Jaemin’s tight-lipped face as you laugh for a while, almost keeling over in your blanket ball onto the hardwood floor. “How conceited are you, oh, my fucking God?”

He slices his hand through the air. “I’ve never had any complaints—”

“Because you’re too busy focusing on your own orgasm, you selfish dickwad,” you say as your laughter dies down.

He sits in his snit for a few more moments until he gets over it.

“Fine, fine,” he huffs. Jaemin knows he’s not going to enjoy this, but he’s the one who suggested it. He can’t back out now. “Let’s just get this over with, you go first.”

With your blanket held by your chest, you hop off your end of the couch and shuffle over in front of him where he’s seated. Beaming, you begin.

“Let’s start with foreplay.” Jaemin’s eyes light up with confidence, thinking he’s at least decent with that. You crush his expression as your lips purse and you shake your head.

“Non-existent.”

“What do you mean?! I kissed you as you took off your clothes.”

You stick your free hand out from your blanket, extending your index finger.

“One: you only kissed my lips. You know, there are other parts of me to kiss, like, I don’t know, my neck, my arms, my shoulders.”

You extend another finger. “And, two: it’s weird to not help someone take off their clothes. Like you’re in a super rush to get somewhere or something—”

“We’re fucking!” he cuts in sharply. “This is a one-night stand, not a relationship.”

Closing your eyes and dropping your head, you pinch the bridge of your nose. You sigh in exaggeration.

“Thought we agreed no rebuttals...” you softly sing-say.

Jaemin’s head sinks a little into his blanket. “Sorry.”

Removing your hand, you shrug. “Maybe there’s some rule that I don’t know about one-night stands, so this could be on me.”

You start to aimlessly tread back and forth in front of him, dragging the blanket along too. “But fuck, foreplay is foreplay for a reason. You work your way up to the heat of the moment and it makes sex much better, regardless if you’re in a relationship with the person or not.”

“Next point.” You stop walking and direct your focus on him. Pointing your finger and looking him dead in the eye, you ask, “Do you know what a vagina is?”

He snorts with a simper. “Uhhh, is this a rhetorical question?”

“No, I’m legit asking,” you say with a raised eyebrow and snarky smile. “Because when you went down on me, all you flicked your tongue at was the outside of it, also called the labia if you didn’t know.”

“I’m premed, of course I—”

“Which is great! But you didn’t go any deeper nor did you go near my clit.”

You thrust your finger again. “Do you also know what that is?”

“Yes...” he groans with the flickering eyelids.

You swipe your arm through the air. “Maybe make use of it, and not only when you go down on girls. Even during sex, touching it is great.”

“And lastly,” you continue. “I’ll be honest here, you have a decent dick.”

Jaemin waggles his finger. “So you were lying before—”

“I wasn’t lying,” you retort firmly. “But anyways, you’ve got the stuff, but why don’t you put it to better use?”

With the following words, you attempt to gesture with your body and execute moves as graphic visuals. Jaemin giggles at the sight.

“Vary the speeds and the angle, don’t just slam it in me and go crazy fast from the get-go. Build up to the climax. Jesus, I couldn’t even get close to coming because you’re like a jackhammer from start to finish.”

When you finally finish, Jaemin’s giggles morph into hollow laughs. Frustration is blatant on your face, pondering if he even absorbed a single word you said.

After he calms down, he asks, “Are you done?”

You mumble, “Yeah, I think so.”

The two of you switch places. He shuffles onto his feet with his blanket while you sit back on the couch.

Jaemin pulls the blanket across the floor as he ambles. “Okay, your head game is decent—”

“Excuse you, my head game is strong.”

“Uh-uh, rebuttal,” he points out.

You sigh. Pinching your fingers together, you drag the invisible zipper across your mouth, then wave your hand, allowing him to resume.

“Your head game is decent. You definitely can deepthroat, but—” He mirrors you from before and extends his index finger.

“One: this happened only a few times, but your teeth scraped against my dick, which is why I assumed you were a borderline virgin.”

You fume silently at the accusation, attempting to not speak up with a heap of rebuttals. But he wasn’t wrong—if you teethed on his dick, that’s a classic virgin move.

“But that’s okay, because we already established that you’re just rusty.” Jaemin flashes you a fake comforting smile as he continues to pace. You flash him one back.

“And two—” He holds another finger out. “Don’t be scared to use your hands and stroke me. Give my dick some love. If it’s too wet, just wipe your hands on the bed or something.”

“Okay, duly noted,” you hum. “Next.”

“Don’t be scared to touch me.”

“I touched you so much during—”

He shoots you a glare. You roll your mouth inward, your lips disappearing instantly.

“Your hands were mostly on the sheets, which is hot, but guys like to be felt up too.”

The attractive individual peers up for a second, thinking to himself. “Even hotter when a girl feels herself up during the fucking, but that’s beside the point. Baby steps, just remember to touch the other person.”

Jaemin does a full-stop and faces you.

“And just... don’t fake it.” Distress is evident in his pout. You hate to admit it, but it’s a little cute. He raises an arm and jerks it in the air. “Why do girls fake it?”

“Because guys with egos like you can’t handle criticism,” you reply bluntly.

“What are we doing, having this conversation, hm?”

“We wouldn’t be having this conversation if it didn’t snow in and keep us here together.” You peel a hand away and gesture to the window. “If I walked out of here this morning, you would’ve just fucked the next girl the same.”

He defends himself, “Faking it just feeds our egos.”

“Yeah, well, if I told you afterwards that I didn’t come, what would you do?”

“Try to make you come in other ways?”

Shaking your head, you scoff. “Guys like you aren’t that considerate.”

“You’re right.” He assents, holding his pointer finger against his chest. “Because guys like me aim to please.”

A brilliant thought leaps in his mind and Jaemin gasps. You can only assume bad things from the wicked smile he sends your way.

“Why don’t we try it again?”

Perplexed, you squint at him.

“Try what again...?”

“Sex,” he says enthusiastically.

You blankly stare at him.

“You’ve gotta be joking,” you deadpan.

“I mean, there’s nothing else to do and it’ll keep us warm.”

You continue to stare at him until you groan.

“Oh, my God...” Your blanket droops a bit off your shoulders as you drag your palms across your face. “I cannot believe I’m stuck in this snowstorm with you out of all people...”

Sitting next to you, Jaemin persistently reasons with you. “Think of it also as another learning experience for the future partners we’ll have.”

“Yeah, if we don’t die first!” you shriek.

“We’re not going to die,” Jaemin replies in a mocking tone and a dart of his tongue.

Outside the window, the snow seems to have slowed down, but not by much.

God, Jaemin better be fucking right because you want to live to see another day.

“Fine,” you mutter and match his gaze. “But we have to be vocal throughout the whole thing. Say whatever’s on our mind.”

“Fine,” he agrees to your terms. He produces the same wicked smile again. “But can we film it then? So we can study it after?”

You fire him a death glare that melts his face off, even in the frigid atmosphere.

“I’m joking, I’m joking,” he says, waving his hand.

They say that jokes are half-meant true, but you think Jaemin fully meant it. Still in your blanket jackets, Jaemin snags your free hand and leads you to his room.

“You gotta give me credit for trying, though.”

“No.” You shake your head with an unwilling smile creeping on the edge of your lips. On second thought, maybe the joke was a little funny, but you still stand by your opinion that he’s the most annoying person in the world. “I don’t think I will.”

“Thank God Chenle has so many scented candles...”

On the edge of Jaemin’s bed, huddled by the blanket, you watch him light up several large jars, placing them on his nightstand and desk in hopes to brighten the room. It’s already late afternoon, but one could mistaken it for nighttime with the muddy sky due to the snow.

“Is Chenle your roommate?”

“Yeah,” Jaemin answers with a slight shiver, igniting the last candle near the bedside. He removed his blanket when he went to nab the matches and candles. “His girlfriend gets free ones from work, so she always gives him a shit ton, even though he never uses them.”

With a glowing hue against his face, he blows out the match. He makes his way to you, a cocky grin plastered on him, as he says, “Guess we’re making use of them now, though.”

Before you can even respond, Jaemin gets right down to business—sitting beside you on the mattress, he palms your face and drags you in for a kiss. You softly yelp, but immediately reciprocate.

The cover falls off your body as you reach to touch him, fingers drifting over his solid arms.

You don’t want to stroke his large ego, and maybe it’s because you haven’t had anyone else on you in a while, but Jaemin’s kisses are something else.

The cushiony pair of lips always executes enough pressure against your mouth, increasing and decreasing on command in perfect tandem and timing. His hands hover over your waist and the nape of your neck, fingers sinking into your hot skin.

His mouth trails downward the side of your neck. You crane your head back, indulging in his caresses as soft moans trickle out.

He gently signals for you to recline back and lay onto the mattress, moving the sea of blankets aside. Inclined on his elbow, almost atop of you, his cool fingers glide under your top layers, his thumb stroking against your stomach.

Pulling away from your body, he tugs on the ends of your clothes. You rise from the bed to better the angle for him to discard of them.

The hairs on your skin are standing on end from the frigid air, but you’re too focused on Jaemin’s mouth migrating over your upper arm and your bra-covered chest to care. Without notice, he stuffs a cup of the bra to one side and takes your bosom into his mouth.

Air’s seized from your lungs and your core contracts from the pleasure. Your fingers tug on Jaemin’s luscious locks and his free hand squeezes your unoccupied breast.

After a few twirls of his tongue and a gentle drawing of his teeth on the pointed tip, he mumbles hotly into your chest while he thumbs your other nipple, “Foreplay still non-existent?”

“It’s better, I guess,” you sigh with fluttering eyes. His chuckling reverberates against your cleavage, a sign of amusement from your obstinacy. A gasp pierces the room as Jaemin repeats his actions onto the other breast.

He aids you in taking off the rest of your clothes and, obviously aware of your goosebumps and shuddering, tells you to get underneath the blankets while he strips himself.

Under the toasty ocean of layers, despite how both of you are bare-boned and how easy it is to jump into the main act, Jaemin purposefully continues to prolong the foreplay. Side by side, your lips meld endlessly; your legs and hands are intertwined in an amorous pretzel.

Jaemin ensures he doesn’t leave any part of you untouched—the pads of fingers virtually graze over every inch of your body. Each grip and drag of his digits sends you in a frenzy. Your chest is pressed into him and your eyes are blinded with desire.

In the back of your mind, you think about how you were right about foreplay working up to the heat of the moment—literally, because you’re dripping, he’s hard, and you two have embraced so much that you don’t need the blankets anymore.

On the other hand, you wonder if Jaemin was right about skipping foreplay, because with every whisper of each other’s name, the intimacy rises immensely. You don’t know him, and neither him with you, but you’re both freely drowning in one another in a plane beyond the lust.

Although the room’s beginning to smell of a mix of all the scented candles, Jaemin hones in and drinks in your sweet aroma and your entirety behind his hazy eyes and already tousled hair. All of a sudden, one drag of his fingers over a particular sensitive spot on your body makes you giggle.

“I’m ticklish over there.”

“You mean right—” He drums his fingers over the area again. “—here?”

With a toothy grin, he generates more suffering from you and you begin to lively howl. Soon enough, you beg him to stop.

“You’re such an asshat, c’mon, let me live!”

When he ceases, his head hangs over yours and your gazes connect.

The same feeling blooms in his chest from before in the living room.

He gulps as his eyes waver over your face, unknowingly tracing your beautiful features and etching them into his memory.

Your starry eyes. Your glowing aura. Your everything.

You barely register the change in his expression because he quickly tramples on his moment of weakness by kissing you passionately.

Jaemin whips the blankets aside as he lowers himself between your legs. Your eyes are fixated on him, matching his stare, until he starts to devour you by swiping against your lustrous folds. Your back bows, and, following a few more licks, Jaemin makes a point of his knowledge of the vagina by spreading your lips and ravishing your pussy, tongue penetrating deeply.

Rippled moans release in harmony with your undulating chest. You swear you’re getting more wet, too wet, likely making it overwhelming for Jaemin, but he’s eagerly lapping every drop up.

“How’s that?” he inquires with a grin, hovering over your trembling nether lips. His mouth is evidently glossy, even under the dim lighting.

“Good,” you pant in the most nonchalant tone you can muster up. “Very good-ahhh—”

Jaemin kindly interrupts you by tonguing your clit as he fingers your sex deeply, shattering your fake indifference.

“Move your tongue up more,” you direct, creasing your eyebrows in despair. He follows your direction, and droning moans ensue.

Jaemin’s immersed in your pleasure, but also adding to his own. The more he laps up your wetness, the more he grinds his length against the bed, aching to be inside of you.

Your desire pulses faster, contracting tighter against his fingers, body winding tensely by the second.

“Fuck, Jaemin,” you whine, leaning your head to one side with a parted mouth. “I’m close.”

He draws back and temporarily replaces his tongue with his thumb.

“Good,” he pants, cocking his head to one side. His eyes are filled with determination. “Because I’m not stopping until you come at least two more times tonight.”

You exhale a light laugh. “That’s ambiti-ohgodohgod—”

His tongue works wonders on your clit once more, so much that he has to brace your bucking hips.

Okay, maybe Jaemin did learn a thing or two and actually listened to what you said during your critique.

But now it’s time to demonstrate to him what you’ve learned.

You don’t need much of a break to catch your breath, nor do you want to immediately freeze due to inactivity, so you pull Jaemin in for an intense kiss, tongue dipping into the remnants of your own nectar, then beckon for him to take your former place on the bed.

Perched on the bottom of your feet, you’re on one side of Jaemin, lackadaisically fisting his prominence. After a few strokes, you gradually swallow his inches, keeping in mind to relax your jaw and to not rush in order to avoid any potential teething. You do this to prove yourself worthy of giving head, but also in spite, because you absolutely do not need Jaemin to brand you a virgin again.

You read his quiet groans and his long fingers running lazily through your hair as a positive sign and advance further.

Carefully, you rest your tongue beneath the underside of his cock and bob your head, licking him until he’s sopping with your saliva. His grip in your hair grows in strength as his length reaches the end of your throat, his groans becoming more and more drawn-out.

A needy whimper leaves him as you suddenly withdraw. Dribbles of your spit follow, and you wipe it off with the back of your hand.

“How am I doing?” you glow in a pant, lazily stroking the doused shaft.

He simply nods with half-lidded eyes, barely able to look at you. “Yeah.”

You snicker at him in his breathless position, a prickle of pride running through your spine over the fact that you blew his mind as much as you blew his dick.

“Use your words, Jaemin.”

Teasingly, your fingers curl around his blunt head, soothing the sensitive tip and sending jolts throughout him.

“Fuck—” he pulls his bottom lip upward. “Awesome. You’re doing awesome.”

“Anything to critique?”

“Mm-mm,” he shakes his head restlessly. You revel a bit more in having the upper hand on him a little while longer. You grip him tighter and hasten your speed, leaving him gasping for air.

“Am I still rusty?”

“Nope, nope,” he croaks, voice rising to a whine. “Definitely not rusty.”

“You sure?” His cockiness has transferred over to you.

“Yes, yes—fuck, slow down, please,” Jaemin begs.

Granting his wish, you abate your rhythm and free his inches from your touch.

You wipe your hands on the sides of the bed while Jaemin rummages through the drawer of his nightstand and hastily rolls over the rubber over himself before he prepares to enter the body beneath his.

Recalling your advice, Jaemin mindfully starts off slow. You sigh blissfully in sync to his thrusts. He adjust himself, attempting another angle, and you draw in air between your teeth.

“There, there—“

Jaemin’s quick-witted and keeps at it, plunging a bit more vigorously. Out of habit, your hands grasp onto the bedsheets, but you wittingly attach them to his frame. Hands grazing his neck, his firm pecs, and his taut muscles.

“Touch-touch my stomach,” he orders in a hush.

You hands follow through and feel up the flexed valley of his abs. Feeling up evolves into desperate gripping and even the slight dragging of your nails.

“Your abs are so fucking hot,” you state thoughtlessly, eyes eating up the view alongside his cock disappearing in and out of you. “Jesus, fuck.”

“Yeah?” he rasps with that devilish smirk of his. God, you want to smack it off him, but not right now—not when you’re reaching euphoria. “You’re not just saying that?”

Oh, you’ve definitely stroked his ego now, but there’s no turning back. Truth spills from you on a whim.

“You’re a fucking masterpiece,” you gasp acutely.

You’re starting to wither away, yet, as if they have a life of their own, your hands drift away from him and find a new home atop your breasts.

“You make me feel so good, Jaemin...”

Jaemin’s eyes go wide. His mouth hangs at the lewdness of you touching yourself.

“Fuck, holy shit.”

His gaze doesn’t leave your ecstatic face or humming body for a second as you knead your breasts and tweak your nipples between your fingers. Your back arches further when Jaemin deepens his sweet, fulfilling thrusts. He’s holding himself back, not wanting to end this beautiful deed just yet.

The stimulation bursts over your body, both from your own doing and Jaemin’s.

You plead, “Faster, please, faster.”

And he complies, but he also rubs your bundle of nerves, causing a tight knot in you to build up and your shallow moans transform into heavy screams. You clasp onto his back and claw at the protruding shoulder blades.

“I’m-I’m—”

You clench, both with your core and your nails digging into him, but Jaemin’s unrelenting, capturing your second peak for the evening.

Instead of coming after you, he shockingly veers lower and closer to you and curbs his pace.

“Was that real?”

You respond with an exhausted nod. Oddly, the smile he shows this time isn’t arrogant, but warm and teetering the line of tenderness. His lips fuse with yours before they stray towards your neck. The passion stews as he sucks your tits, all the while lunging laxly into you.

With an obscene pop!, Jaemin removes himself from your nubs.

“Ready for the last round?”

His fast thrusts, hitting you precisely in the best spot, cloud your already weakened logic, deterring you from making any response.

Perspiration is blatant on both individuals. For him, his forehead glistens gorgeously with his damp hair. For you, the back of your bent knees are gluing together. Your bodies are about to pass out, but you both persevere until the end.

As you convulse and perish together in beautiful agony, coincidentally enough, the bulbs in the room and in the streets leap to radiance.

Together, you collapse onto the bed side by side, panting heavily and laughing.

“Told you we weren’t going to die.”

You turn your head to see Jaemin looking at you with a cheeky grin. In retaliation, you stick your tongue out.

By nighttime, it’s finally stopped snowing outside. However, the streets won’t be cleared until morning, at the very least.

But... you’re surprisingly okay with that.

In a turn of events, the sex inexplicably makes the two of you warm up to each other. There still is targeted banter and tension between you, lingering from before, but it’s less hostile and more playful.

During a fancy Christmas Eve dinner of microwavable pizzas, you poke fun at each other’s majors and discuss your respective hobbies in depth, especially his love for photography. Jaemin even asks if he can take a picture of you, claiming that the kitchen lighting actually looks nice on someone for once.

“Is that how you collect the memory of your one-night stands? Instead of hanging their skins in your closet, you sweet-talk your way and keep all the photos of them?” you joke, referring to the video call from yesterday night. It feels like an eternity ago, but snowstorms tend to do that.

He chuckles behind the camera as he snaps a photo of you scrunching your face cutely.

“Yeah, but you’re the first one who has clothes on,” he says, glancing down at the photo on the camera roll.

“Ugh, gross,” you cringe and take a sip of tea.

Jaemin doesn’t add anything further. He leaves out the fact that he never keeps any traces of his one-night stands, that you’re the first girl he’s taken a picture of in a while.

After a few hours of more talking and even some gaming with one another, sleep is much needed. Jaemin offers an extra toothbrush and a sweater and pair of sweats to sleep in. You’re facing each other on his bed, noses almost touching.

“It’s been a while since I haven’t had sex with a girl before I slept next to them,” he whispers, adjusting himself comfortably. The side of his face rests on his piled hands. “It’s kinda nice.”

You cover your mouth as you yawn, then lay your hand back under your head, reflecting the same position as Jaemin.

“You know, it might be my sleepiness talking, but maybe you’re not the worst person in the world to be stuck with during a snowstorm.”

A lovely chuckle echoes in your ear. “I’m glad you’ve had a change of heart.”

After a few moments, your eyes are fluttering to a close until he softly calls out your name.

“Hm?” you stir awake, but not by much.

“Do you...?”

Jaemin doesn’t know what’s gotten to him, doesn’t quite understand why the defences he built for so long are crumbling down in only a day of knowing you.

And yet, something urges him to give it a chance.

Blowing out a shaky sigh, he anxiously intertwines his fingers with yours. You hum softly at the action and a small smile blooms on your face.

“Do you want to go on a date with me sometime?”

“Hm?” His question doesn’t take you aback as much as you would be if you were fully awake. But even in your drowsy state, you have quips in hand. “Jaemin, the notorious fuckboy and serial one-night stander, wants to go on a date?”

“Yeah,” he replies gently, brushing your loose hair out of your face.

Another yawn. “I thought you said you don’t want feelings and relationships and all that shit.”

His fingers trace your pretty jawline and shrugs. “One date doesn’t mean we’re going to be in a relationship, I’m sure you know that.”

You pause for a good two seconds, but the two seconds feel like forever for Jaemin.

“Mmm, fine. One date, just one.” You barely hold up your pointer finger. “And only because it’s Christmas tomorrow. ‘Tis the season to be giving...”

Relief washes over Jaemin in the form of a smile. Embracing the blatant feeling in his chest this time, he plants a light kiss on your nose and wishes you sweet dreams, even though you’ve already fallen soundly asleep.

Sunlight pours over your eyes on Christmas morning.

Déjà vu peculiarly creeps up on you, but the only thing that’s the same as yesterday is waking up in Jaemin’s bed.

He’s next to you this time, deep in his peaceful slumber, instead of waiting for you to leave by his doorframe. The snow has finally stopped, and you think you hear the faint noises of snow plows outside. You inhale deeply and also notice the faded aroma from all the scented candles from last night.

The scenes of yesterday flicker across your mind. The incredible sex. The talking. The dinner. The interlocking of his fingers with yours.

The date he asked you out on.

You stare at him, watching him sleep with a sense of content.

Turning your body, you routinely check your phone, which is charging beside his. You have a slew of Merry Christmas texts from several chats and a few private messages from your friends.

Your attention falls on Jaemin’s phone when it lights up with a notification, likely texts from his friends and family too.

But that’s not what you’re focusing on.

Your heart sinks at the sight of his lockscreen.

It’s a picture of him and a girl kissing.

A twinge emerges in your chest and twists harder and harder.

Jaemin being a fuckboy, you can respect. People can do whatever they want with their lives.

But to cheat?

That’s unforgivable, and a true sin if there ever was one.

You scramble to dash out of there, careful not to make any noises in fear of waking Jaemin up. However, Jaemin’s sensitive to the sounds of the front door, so he rouses awake. His eyes flit open, noticing how you’re gone. He then sees his phone blowing up and adds two and two together.

With his phone in hand, Jaemin rushes to get on a coat and stuffs his feet into his boots, not giving a shit that he’s wearing his thin pajamas in the coldness. He’s bounding down the flight of stairs and onto the bright, white wonderland of the streets.

He swivels his head and catches sight of you almost past down the block, slowly trekking through the thick snow. Jaemin sprints, as much as he can, and hops towards you.

He yells your name, making others on the street turn, but you don’t. You continue forward without looking back.

“Wait! I can explain!”

You’re trying to gain speed, but cardio isn’t your friend. Thankfully for Jaemin, it’s a close friend for him.

“I don’t wanna fucking hear it, Jaemin,” you grunt, hearing the rapid crunching of his shoes coming closer. “Get lost.”

“No, listen to me for a second.”

The boyish man grasps you by the arm and turns you around. You throw his arm away from you and he holds his hands in the air, letting you know that he respects your space. He drops his hands and sees that you’re seething, even worse than you were when he kicked you out yesterday.

“How are you going to explain your lockscreen with you kissing your fucking girlfriend?! Hm?”

“Ex,” he pants in clarification. “Ex-girlfriend.”

Your eyebrows mesh together in utter confusion.

“Okay? That doesn’t make me feel any better, knowing that you’re still hung up on your ex.”

Jaemin shakes his head and rakes a hand through his hair. You note the large clouds he exhales and how he’s barely wearing any clothes. A tinge of sympathy passes through you, wanting to give him some of your clothes for extra layers, but you smother that quickly in your state of rage.

“I’m not hung up on her. Remember you asked me yesterday why I don’t want girls to stay the next morning?”

You cock your head impatiently, as if saying, “Yeah.”

“Well, I don’t want to attach myself to girls. I can’t. I...”

He lowers his head to one side. Shutting his eyes, a long puff emits from his mouth.

“She cheated on me.”

The snow plows in the distance can’t compare to the pumping of your heart in your ears. All the feelings you felt in the last day, but especially in the last fifteen minutes, jumble together in your head, making you feel uneasy and unsure of what to exactly feel or comprehend of the situation.

But you do know one thing, despite the fact that you two barely know each other, the pained look on his face is real—that this is the untold story behind his ways.

Jaemin lifts his head and holds out his phone for emphasis. “The lockscreen serves as a constant reminder that dating and feelings will and can fuck me up.”

Carefully, he steps a little closer to you and slowly cups your face in his shaking hands. You don’t pull away nor is there the same anger from moments before, so he daintily runs his thumbs over your cheeks.

“Until you showed me yesterday that maybe I’m willing to give it all another shot. Risk it all for fuck knows what, but you make it look like it’s worth it.”

He continues his ramble after adjusting some of your hair from the ongoing breeze.

“Sure, it’s Christmas today, but I don’t want you to say yes to going on a date with me just because it is. I want you to say yes because maybe you like spending time with me just as much as I like to spend it with you.”

You’re completely disoriented—your eyes are shifting everywhere but his eyes and your lips are quivering with no words coming out. He sighs understandingly.

“Look, I know you’re probably having second thoughts and you don’t have to give me an answer right now. Think on it for as much time as you need, but I want you to know that I genuinely like you and I want to go on an actual date with you.”

He peels his hand away from your face and raises it into the air as if taking an oath.

“I, Na Jaemin, the notorious fuckboy and serial one-night stander, will devote to monogamy once again if it means I can date you.”

His hands grab yours, kisses the back of them, and then he presses one kiss onto your icy cheek prior to walking away.

“Merry Christmas,” he says with a sad smile. “You know where to find me if you change your mind.”

Later that evening at your large family’s Christmas party, you take another dreadful gulp of your wine.

It’s the happy holiday season, but why does everyone feel the need to stick their nose in your dating life? Well, really, a lack there of.

“Why are you still single?” Layers of their voices resound the same question in your head. You take another swig.

Potential unsaid answers that you kept to yourself fly around as you swish the drink in your glass.

Because you choose to be.

Okay, not really, but it’s the easiest answer.

Because you haven’t found the right guy to get you back in the game.

What does that even mean? What makes the right guy even right?

The right guy? It’s someone who makes you laugh, someone who gives as good as they can take it, someone who wants you just as much as you do.

The cogs move in your head as you take one more sip before you finally come to the conclusion—

Because you didn’t find the right guy until last night.

Despite the mess of today and yesterday morning, you realize that Jaemin is... actually sort of sweet. Annoying, yes, but he keeps you on your toes. It’s a plus that he’s easy on the eyes, but it’s a bigger plus that he’s even easier to talk to.

And if he can find it in his scorched heart to trust you, you can find it in your heart to trust him too.

You quickly say your good-byes to your family and let them know you have other plans with friends tonight.

As the Uber rolls up to his apartment building, you realize you probably should’ve messaged him on Tinder, but it’s worth a shot to see if he’s home. Anyways, impulsiveness is a controlling entity, as evident from your Christmas Eve Eve’s adventure.

And in retrospect, perhaps Jaemin was the perfect pick of the crop after all.

Someone’s entering the building and lets you in behind them. You take the stairs two at a time and hear booming music coming from his floor. At first, you assume it’s from other apartments, but it’s all coming from one—his.

Without a thought, your knuckle taps the door.

A handsome figure that’s definitely not Jaemin opens the door. Behind him, you see a group of young men scattered around the living room, and some have a few girls tucked under their arms.

The man eyes you up and down with a spark in his eye. He’s not Jaemin, but he surely reminds you of him.

“And who might you be?” he asks.

“Who’s at the door, Jeno?” An unknown male voice hollers in a high pitch from the couch. He’s one of the guys with a girl attached to him.

You blink. “Uhm, I’m—”

“She’s with me!” Jaemin shoves the flirty stranger aside and tugs you by your wrist, making headway to his bedroom. He flips the light switch on and the door clicks shut.

“What are you doing h—”

You cut him off with a kiss.

An innocent one, at first, with hints of alcohol on each other’s lips. Your arms wrap around the other and the passion increases with the mingling of your tongues, each party tasting and confirming the specific drinks you both consumed tonight.

Jaemin forces himself to pull away and presses his forehead against yours. “Did you just come all the way here to kiss me, or...?”

“Maybe I came over to ask... if I can stay with you for another night?” you playfully ask, fingers intertwining behind the nape of his neck.

He chuckles heartily. His fingers sink into the sides of your waist. “Is my dick that great? The sex with me that amazing?”

“Mmm, that’s definitely a benefit,” you agree, fluttering your nose against his. “But I want more than that—“ You poke a finger to his chest. “—I want the man behind the dick.”

Your gazes converge, bringing you together as one.

“I want to go on that date with you. I want you, Jaemin.”

He flashes a megawatt smile that could compete with a million Christmas lights, but it fades suddenly and you’re unsure why he seems like he’s about to bawl his eyes out.

“That’s so beautiful, I might cry.” He brings a finger to his eye, pretending to shed a tear.

Oh, yeah—you’re definitely going to need to hire someone to constantly shove your eyeballs back into your sockets if you’re going to date Jaemin.

“Oh, shut up,” you whisper, yanking him in for another kiss.

Three dates later, including a memorable New Year’s Eve, you finally decide to rid of the Tinder app for good.

With his arm around you on his living room couch, Jaemin glances over your shoulder.

“Really? You’re finally deleting your Tinder?”

You snort in disbelief. “That’s gold, coming from the King of Tinder himself. When did you delete?”

He turns to face the television and shrugs coolly.

“Maybe I didn’t.”

“Wouldn’t put it past you,” you nod, eyes still on your phone.

“Nah, I’m kidding, I did.”

You sharply turn your head.

“No way. When?” you press with narrow eyes.

A shy smile emerges on Jaemin’s face as he picks his pants over his thighs.

“On the night of Christmas Eve, after you agreed to go on a date with me.”

7K notes · View notes

noteguk · 4 years ago

Text

bad behavior | jjk | m

This is in the same universe as “bad influence.” It can, however, be read as a stand-alone.

— summary; in which staying late to volunteer at a self-help meeting was the best decision you made in a while.

— contents and warnings; smut, the endless adventures of badboy!jk x goodgirl!reader, public sex (in a church…), dirty talk, fingering, degradation (name calling) but also praise, unprotected sex, clothed sex, creampie, cum play, there is a window and also reflections, rough sex, cockwarming, jk being a lil shit because that’s his main personality trait, jk smokes (only mentioned), enemies to fuckbuddies: dawn of the first day

— words; 8.2k

— author’s note; for the anon that asked how their first time was like ;) join me as we explore the lore of this godforsaken couple

It was your mother’s idea for you to find a new place to volunteer. According to her, it had been a long time since you experienced “the invigorating energy of community work” — last time was when you were trying to level up your college application — and it could really “soothe your anxious soul” during the trying times of college finals. Apparently one tutoring program and two research projects weren’t enough to distract you, but you could see where she was coming from.

In the end, you accepted. The old places you used to volunteer in had either shut off their programs or were just too far away from college for you to consider. At first, you decided to follow your mother’s suggestion and tried to work with children — “small miracles”, as she called them — in a local daycare. Which ended up being a terrible idea.

You liked giving back to the community, you really did, but it wasn’t long until you realized that working with infants hasn’t been your wisest decision, and that children weren’t miracles at all. You got tired of going home covered in paint and with pieces of playdough entangled in your hair, and that was when you weren’t unlucky enough to get hit with other, less clean fluids.

So you eventually gave up — both on the daycare and on the faint idea of one day going into pediatrics — and searched for a new place. After having to yell your way through retirement homes, and getting fed up with washing people’s sidewalks, you finally settled in a program that was flexible and light enough for your intense college hours: preparing (and then later cleaning up) a room that was reserved in a local church for weekly meetings.

The entire ordeal took about two to three hours off your day, and more than half of it was spent as free time: waiting for the meeting to end, cramming piles of information in a small room next door. You didn’t really know what the meetings were about since they changed practically every month — they were, at first, a support group for teenage mothers, then it became an AA meeting, then a group for drug users trying to quit. Lately, you were starting to think that the church just gave away the room for whoever had the money to rent it, so it wasn’t a surprise when it was reserved for a motivational speaker to give confidence lessons.

You had researched the guy, some old dude with an unpronounceable name and a sketchy background, and found exactly the type of person you had expected. Yes, you were in the house of Christ, but you were still being heavily judgmental of the fact that he was giving those talks when he had no qualifications whatsoever, and was probably making bank off all the self-help books he regurgitated at least twice a year to prey on vulnerable people. You did share your worries with the administrative office of the church, but they ultimately fell on deaf ears, and you gave up on the idea of kicking his ass out of the holy grounds anytime soon.

It was after one of those pseudo-motivational talks that you walked into the empty room, ready to clean everything up before rushing back to your place, where your roommate had promised to greet you with some wonderful takeout. The chairs were still placed in a circle on the center of the room, where they had been since forever, and you made sure to align them perfectly before you moved on to the litter that had been thrown around the place.

One good thing about those self-help meetings was that they were a lot cleaner than a lot of other attendees, so the “picking up the trash until your back started to hurt” part passed by surprisingly fast. You had just moved on to the snack table, analyzing what you could still save, when your soul almost left your body.

“Hey, you,” you heard a known voice behind you. “What are you doing in here?”

You swiftly turned around, heart thumping violently against your ribcage. You didn’t know how you hadn’t let out the biggest, most blood-curdling scream ever, but that was just the first of many miracles of the night. “Jesus Christ,” you wheezed out, taking one hand to your chest. “You shouldn’t sneak up on people like this.” You swallowed dry, some part of your brain recalling that he had asked you a question. “And I’m volunteering here.”

“I didn’t sneak up on you, you’re just jumpy.” Jungkook scoffed, leaning against the doorframe with that stupid playful smirk curling up on his lips. You didn’t know they allowed demons inside the church. “And of course you are.” He rolled his eyes.

Maybe a few months back, his mocking tone would’ve stung a bit more. However, you had been tutoring Jungkook for about three months then, suffering through endless sessions of his whining and complaining, and you’ve grown used to his passive-aggressive antics already. You learned that Jungkook was a shark seeking for blood, waiting for any crack that would allow him to jump into a perverse little joke — about how you behaved, your priorities, or even the color of your highlighter. You, of course, always stood your ground and threw his comments right back at him — which was his initial plan, as you’ve come to realize. Jungkook enjoyed playfully arguing with you, and you thought that it was another level of strangeness and masochism you simply didn’t have time to dissect.

Still, Jungkook (shockingly) wasn’t the terrible person you once thought he was. Every once in a while — when he was trying to talk you out of teaching him — the conversations you two would have were actually mostly pleasant, and he wasn’t awful to hang around when he dropped the whole badass persona to act like a real human being. You would even dare to say that Jungkook could be actually funny at times, and not in the bitter, sarcastic way he usually was. Sometimes, you dared to think, he could actually be reasonably nice. And also kind of cute. Even hot.

But you would never actually admit any of that out loud. Or even to yourself, really.

“And you?” You asked, turning back around to face the table full of half-eaten food. That looked like a battlefield, and you could already tell that there were only a few survivors left standing. “What are you doing here? Repenting?”

Jungkook chuckled dryly. “You wish. My parents want me to quit smoking,” he said. You could not see him, but you could hear him walking closer to you as you fumbled with the large Tupperware. “We settled on this crap instead of a forced intervention.”

You scoffed. Most of the food before you was unsalvageable — some of the cupcakes had been bitten once and then placed back, and you wondered how someone like that could function in society. “You don’t seem very motivated to quit,” you mumbled.

Jungkook clicked his tongue. “I don’t really care.”

His voice was much closer to you, and you felt the air leaving your lungs for a pitiful instant. You convinced yourself you had only gotten scared again. “You should care about the growing possibility of lung cancer.”

He shrugged. “Maybe. But it’s not really on the top of my list of priorities at the moment.”

“And what is?” You asked.

“Amongst other things…” he trailed off and, suddenly, he was standing besides you, pointing at the chaotic pile of sweets. “I actually came back to grab another one of those cupcakes. The chocolate ones are great.”

You didn’t know why, but his comment broke the odd tension that you didn’t even know that was there, clicking you back into your previous mentality — the one that you just wanted to finish cleaning up so you could leave soon. “All yours,” you told him, “grab as many as you want.”

Jungkook hummed in satisfaction, reaching out to grab one special brown cupcake — an untouched one, thankfully. “I love when you talk dirty.” He almost moaned before shoving the cupcake inside his mouth, taking a huge bite off it. Dramatically, Jungkook rolled his eyes and sighed in delight. “These are fucking great.”

You chuckled, glancing at his direction. Jungkook was dressed in all black, like he usually was, and you were starting to recognize a newfound admiration towards his constant use of leather jackets. What? He looked good. “I’m glad the self-help sessions are paying off,” you commented, swiftly placing the cupcakes inside the transparent container.

Jungkook was paying attention to your actions now, like he noticed you were there working for the first time. “What are you doing with the rest?”

“The church will probably donate it, give it to the homeless or something.” You shrugged. “Or they’ll eat it, I don’t know. I just clean up the place and leave.”

Jungkook laughed at that, taking another monstrous bite from his cupcake and throwing himself on one of the nearby chairs. Your eye twitched a little at the thought that he had ruined your perfect circle, but you’d have to fix that on your way out. “Sounds absurdly boring,” he sang. “And they’re not even paying you.”

You sighed. “After all the places I’ve volunteered in, boring is a blessing,” you told him. You had just placed five hot dogs in the container, and you were starting to wonder if it would be a good idea to feed people in need with those suspicious sausages. “But, yeah, you probably don’t care about any of that.”

“You don’t know what I care about,” Jungkook said matter-of-factly. You didn’t know if he was trying to tease you, but his voice came out so soft and monotone that you couldn’t really be mad about it. It was true, after all: you didn’t actually know what he cared about. Sometimes you thought that he could read you better than you could read him. “Want me to stay here with you? This place is probably empty already.”

You could not hold back your laugh at that, turning around so you could look at him. “Are you offering to be my bodyguard? In a church?”

Jungkook pouted. There was a thin line of chocolate on the side of his lips, which he quickly licked clean. “I’m trying to be nice.”

You giggled, turning back towards the disgusting food. The rest was mostly trash, but you were happy enough with the amount you had managed to find in a good state. “That’s new.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” He asked. “I’m always nice.”

“Always is a strong word.” You smiled, closing the lid of the Tupperware. You had managed to fill three small containers with the leftovers and, honestly, that was a big victory. “But you can stay or you can leave, I don’t mind. I’m almost done anyways.”

He frowned. “Is that your answer?”

You turned around. “What? You want me to beg for your company?” You smiled. “You’re mistaken if you think I’d ever do that.”

“I’m staying.” Jungkook crumpled up the piece of cupcake wrapping and threw it in the trash can besides your body. He watched you for a moment as you started to throw the leftovers away, your back turned to him and a distracted look on your face. When he broke the silence again, you were throwing the last piece of bread in the bin. “Why are you volunteering?”

“Because I like giving back to the community.”

Jungkook sneered at your words. “Seriously now. Don’t lie, we’re in a church.”

“I do, actually,” you stood your ground. There was a vague sound of crickets coming from the half-open window and the low buzzing of the fluorescent lights above you, but, other than that, the city was covered in absolute silence. Perhaps that was why you felt so at peace. “But my mom told me it would be a good thing to keep myself relaxed. You know, take my mind off college stuff.”

He hummed, and you heard him getting up from the chair. “You always do what your mom tells you?”

You met his gaze. “Didn’t your parents make you come here?”

He smiled. “Not the point.”

Before you could hold yourself back, your lips were curling up. Again: Jungkook wasn’t absolutely awful to be around when he actually acted like a human being. “When she says something I agree with, yes,” you told him. “My ego isn’t bruised when it comes to following someone’s idea.”

He raised his eyebrows. “You’re saying that mine is?”

“I didn’t say that.” You smirked and turned back to the table. You started piling up the used plastic cups, already eyeing all the used plates, forks and knives that you’d have to throw away. The daycare had better eating manners than that. “Thought we were talking about me.”

“We were,” Jungkook agreed. One of his inked hands moved to the table, and you were about to tell him that he could eat more of the cupcakes when you realized that he had started to reach for the discardable plates, throwing them away. You really didn’t think he’d help you. “Finals are coming up, though, and you care about that shit. Shouldn’t you be using this time to study or something?”

“I study while you’re out here listening to becoming your real self or, I don’t know... waking up the giant within,” you said. “I’m fine, don’t worry about it.”

He hummed, his nose cringing up at the disgusting remains of food that stuck to the plastic forks. Jungkook seriously didn’t know how you could do that for fun. “You know there are better ways to relax than cleaning up a dusty room, right?”

“Probably,” you agreed. The cups were already in the trash, alongside with the plates, and there were only a few crumpled up napkins to get rid of before you tasted the sweet nectar of freedom. “But here I am. That’s what I chose for myself.”

“Literally any other option would’ve been better,” Jungkook pressed on. “Isn’t that obnoxious friend of yours in cheer or something?”

“Who? Jisoo?” You smiled at him. No one had ever called her obnoxious, but you couldn’t say that the title didn’t fit. Jisoo could be really… intense when it came to standing up for what she believed in. “She is. She invited me to join her already, if that’s what you’re gonna ask, but it’s not really my thing.”

“It’s a shame,” he mumbled, leaning against the table. It was a beautiful miracle how clean that room had become just by getting rid of the piles of gross food, and you had proudly thrown the last piece of paper inside the trash bin when Jungkook spoke up again. “You’d look really hot in that outfit.”

You stopped in your tracks, taking a second to digest the claim he had so mindlessly thrown your way. Just like all-things-Jungkook, a pleasant conversation could not last long, so you weren’t even surprised that he managed to ruin that talk with such a fuckboy-esque comment.

Also like all-things-Jungkook, he managed to awaken a reaction out of you that you didn’t even know could be there. With a faint heat in your cheeks and a frown blossoming amongst your features, you actually felt a little bit of... satisfaction with the fact that he thought that you’d look hot in that skimpy outfit. At the same time, you wanted to slap yourself for falling into his charms so easily.

In that conflicting turmoil of emotions, all you could say was a monotone, “You cannot be serious right now.”

Even if you kind of wanted him to be serious.

“I’m being dead serious,” Jungkook didn’t back down, much to the elation of your ego. You felt like a schoolgirl being recognized by her crush, and the idea alone made your stomach curl onto itself. What the hell were you even thinking about? Yeah, Jungkook was pretty hot, but he was also kind of a douche and you didn’t want to get involved with that mess of a person. Or at least that was what you were trying to convince yourself of. “I mean…” he continued, “you’re even rocking this knee-level dress right now, can’t even imagine how you’d look if—“

“You can shut up now, Jungkook, thanks,” you interrupted him. Because you didn’t know how to act when he was so blatantly flirting with you, you switched back to the same passive-aggressive behavior that you had given him for the past three months. Call it self-preservation, call it panic, but your mind simply didn’t know where to go from there. “And I’m also done here, so you can skidaddle back to whatever swamp you came out of.”

“Awn, don’t be mean, princess.” He pouted. Jungkook was a master at getting you worked up, and you had just given that to him on a silver platter. Maybe if you had mock-flirted back, he would’ve baked away. You would never know. “I was just fucking with you, you’re too easy to tease.”

You pressed your lips together, hip touching the corner of the now empty table. “You were pretty much harassing me,” you said playfully.

“I was not.” Jungkook smirked, shoving his hands inside the pockets of his pants. When had the two of you gotten so close? There was barely any space between your chests. “But it’s okay, I’m not gonna compliment you anymore, don’t worry. You don’t have to be so defensive.”

“I’m not being defensive,” you said, defensive.

“What, is it the church setting?” He raised his eyebrows, taking a look around. “Is it making you uncomfortable?”

“No,” you answered, crossing your arms before your chest. Jungkook followed the movement and his gaze got stuck on the shape of your breasts for a second too long, making a newfound wave of heat rise up to your cheeks. “Not as much as you’re trying to make me uncomfortable right now.”

He chuckled. “You do look cute when you’re shy,” Jungkook teased, taking a step towards you, and you took another one back, pretending you were just going to lean against the table. You sat on it in a weird diagonal position, with one leg still on the ground and the other dangling over the edge. Jungkook was so close that, when he spoke again, voice just above a whisper, you could feel his breath on your skin. “If you don’t want me here, just ask me to go and I’ll go.”

You opened your mouth to respond, but no words came out. The atmosphere was filled with electricity, your body drowning in the warmth of his presence, the sharp seriousness in his dark eyes, and you could not bring yourself to say anything. Did you want him to leave?

No, you realized in a rush of adrenaline, you didn’t want him to leave at all.

Jungkook raised one of his eyebrows. “Hm? Nothing?” He smirked, placing himself between your legs. Every nerve of your body was screaming for you to touch him, to just wrap his mouth with yours, and you simply could not respond to any of its commands. “You’re full of surprises.”

You found your voice at that comment, heart hammering against your chest. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“You’re a smart girl, you can figure it out.” Jungkook placed one strand of your hair behind your ear, his gaze flickering down to your chest. From where he stood, he could see the beautiful mounds of your breasts peeking under the fabric, licking his lips at the sight. “Can I at least say that I like your dress?”

Jungkook’s palm slithered up your knee before you could even react, moving towards your inner thigh and raising your dress along with it. His touch was electrifying, and you found yourself craving more of it, a sigh caught on your throat at the tenderness of his hot skin.

“Something tells me that your compliment isn’t so innocent,” you told him, leaning your head back slightly so you could hold his gaze. “Aren’t you gonna complete that and say that I would look better without it?”

Jungkook chuckled. “The idea is compelling, I’ll admit it,” he said, rubbing soft circles on your skin. His other hand slithered around your waist, pulling you closer to him. “But don’t need to take it off to fuck you.”

Your eyes grew wide at that, brain short-circuiting. You frankly couldn’t believe that was happening — the fact that Jungkook was so shamelessly trying (and honestly succeeding) to initiate sex with you. In a fucking church too, of all places. “What- what did you say?”

“You heard what I said.” His stare didn’t falter. Jungkook was looking at you like he could eat you whole, and you seriously wouldn’t mind if he tried to. You'd deal with the social and psychological implications of that another time. “Just tell me to stop and I’ll do it, princess. No hard feelings, promise.”

This time, you spoke out and the firmness and certainty in your voice surprised even yourself. “I don’t want you to stop.”

“No?” His voice sounded like honey, so deep and melodic even through the thick layers of his sarcasm. You had never heard him get so serious, so focused, and the thought that it was all for you was igniting a fire inside your guts. “You wanna get fucked in a church?”

You bit your lip, blinking up at him. The point was: you wanted Jungkook, of all people, to fuck you. The fact that it was in a church was just the cherry on top, and you didn’t care about it as much as you should — your mom would be weeping blood if she knew what was going on, but you weren’t planning on telling anything to anybody. “And what if I do?” You asked back teasingly.

Jungkook smiled, knocking the breath right out of you. You could only hope that you didn’t look as horny as you felt, because your pride was still on the line. “Told you that you were full of surprises.” He pushed one of your legs open, making you lose your support on the floor. Now, both of your feet were dangling off the edge, body trapped between his strong arms and thighs on either side of him. “Are you a virgin, baby?”

You shook your head, and your voice reached you a bit later. “No.”

“Naughty,” Jungkook said, leaning in. He stared at you like a lion stalking its prey, his gaze lingering on your parted lips before, at last, he tilted his head to the side, deciding to move towards your neck instead. “But if you have the taste I think you do, you probably had some lame missionary sex with some goodie-two shoes.”

When he started kissing your neck, you almost forgot to give him a response. You had to bite your lip to suppress a moan, instead producing a low, shaky sigh. “And if I did? What’s the problem with some lame missionary sex?”

“No need to get mad, I’m on your side here,” Jungkook said, one of his hands navigating up your waist, between the valley of your breasts, before grabbing your boob. That time, you couldn’t hold back the whimper that escaped you. “Did he make you cum?”

“Sometimes,” you said, slightly flustered. You didn’t think you’d be discussing your sexual history with Jungkook, but, well, there you were. “He was alright.”

“Only sometimes?” Jungkook chuckled, the vibrations of his deep timbre vibrating through the sensitive skin of your neck, his thumb grazing your nipple. The heat between your legs only grew, your entire body practically begging to feel more of him. “That’s a shame, I could do better.”

You rolled your eyes. “Don’t start getting cocky.”

“I never stopped being cocky,” he responded without hesitation. Well, he was right. “And I do have a good track record.”

“Doubt it,” you said, the ghost of a smile lingering on your lips. You knew that you were playing a dangerous game, pressing right at the weak spots of his inflated ego to see how he would react. Perhaps you’d be luckier trying to poke a bear with a short stick. “You wouldn’t know the difference between a real and fake orgasm even if it hit you in the face.”

Jungkook leaned back and looked at you for an instant. You knew he had caught onto your challenge straight away. He liked it as much as you did, there was no doubt about that. “Let’s see, shall we?” he asked. There was no denying the devilish aura that was all around him now, suffocating you with its tempting heat. “How long do we have?”

“I’m locking up the room tonight,” you said, watching as his eyes sparked with an emotion you could not decipher. “But I wanna get home before ten. Have homework.”

You could see him fighting against the natural urge to ridicule you for saying something like that at such an odd time, but, at the end, he managed to avoid it. “More than enough time.” Jungkook placed one hand on the back of your neck, gaze darting hungrily toward your lips. “Come here.”

And then his mouth was on yours, and everything else was white noise. Jungkook kissed you much slower than you had anticipated, taking his sweet time caressing your mouth with his; hands exploring the curves of your body and teasing their way underneath your dress. He sighed heavily against your mouth when you wrapped your arms around his shoulders, pulling him closer and deepening the kiss, his soft tongue poking out and entering your mouth perfectly. Jungkook was a good kisser, you had to admit it, and he got your knees weak sooner than you’d like.

His body was hot and firm against yours and you could feel the outline of his abs underneath your fingers as you trailed your hands down his torso; his quick heartbeat drumming on your palms. Jungkook’s breathing got heavier as you hooked your fingers on the hem of his pants and tugged him toward you. Instantly you noticed the outline of his hard cock against your inner thigh.

Then, something switched. Just as you had reached out to touch his hardness, squeezing it lightly underneath your fingers, Jungkook groaned against your mouth and bit down on your lip. You had barely any time to react before he was pulling away from the kiss, gaze darkening.

“Such a tease,” he mumbled hoarsely, his breath hitting your mouth in soft waves. His hand was hovering over your heat, his middle finger pressing down on your sensitive nub, making you whimper. “You don’t know what you do to me.”

Jungkook was much quicker than your thoughts and, within a second, the motion of your panties being pushed aside made you fumble closer to him; your hands holding tightly onto his shoulders when he finally decided to touch you.

“Fuck,” he groaned next to your ear, making your mind go blank for a split second. The teasing motions of his digits brushing your entrance were enough to make you whimper, hips thrusting forward in a failed attempt to make him move further. “Look at this, you’re soaking my fingers. Wanna get fucked that bad?”

But he didn’t let you respond. The sudden intrusion of two fingers inside your pussy made your back arch, nails digging in the leather of his jacket as Jungkook opened you up. “I—” you tried to speak, but it was hard to think when he started pumping his fingers in and out of you. The sounds of your wetness were a filthy symphony filling the quiet atmosphere. “Jungkook, what—”

“God, that’s so tight,” he groaned, speaking through clenched teeth. His voice was enough to shut you up at the spot, a frail moan dripping from your lips. “Relax, baby, you’re too tense. Let me take care of you, alright?”

You nodded, eyes drifting shut as he continued to pump his fingers in and out of you. You hated to admit it, but Jungkook was already winning against your ex by a long shot: the way his digits brushed inside you, gradually moving apart to stretch you, got you searching — begging — for more. You were sure you could cum around his fingers and, when he curled them up and they dragged against your sweet spot, the idea became a lot more palpable.

“Jungkook, you’re taking too long, I’m gonna cum like this,” you complained, chest rising and falling under the waves of your upcoming orgasm. You could feel it building up in your stomach, ready to snap, and you didn’t want it to happen around his fingers. “I wanna feel you.”

Jungkook breathed out at your needy request, placing a kiss against your jaw. “I’m just getting you ready for my cock, baby,” he said. A loud moan dripped from you when he unceremoniously added a third finger, your legs trembling on either side of his body. “I don’t know if you can take it.”

You scoffed. “Don’t flatter yourself,” you said, only half aware of the fact that your voice sounded more like a whimper than a serious comment. “I can.”

He smirked wickedly. You really were pushing his buttons. “We’ll see about that,” Jungkook responded.

Within a second, right as your orgasm was about to wash over you, he removed his fingers from your pussy. The frustrated moan you let out was quickly swollen by him, his mouth rogue against yours and the sweetness of his tongue intoxicating you — probably those stupid cupcakes, you thought.

“Turn around for me,” he asked.

You quickly did as he requested, putting your feet on the ground before turning your back to him, hands leaning on the table. Jungkook placed one hand on the curve of your spine, pushing you down until you had your chest against the surface, ass perked up and pussy in full display for him. There was a gush of cold air against your flesh when he pulled up the fabric of your dress and tossed it over your waist, exposing your lower body for him.

The boy hummed at the sight, one of his legs kicking your feet apart so he could position himself in the middle of your thighs. “You’re pretty all around,” Jungkook commented, one of his palms grazing your asscheek before grabbing it. His motion was harsh, needy; earning a whimper from you. “Knew you would be.”

Through the dense clouds of your desire, there was still some part of you that managed to make fun of that situation. “You spend your free time thinking about my ass?”

“Won’t answer until I have a lawyer present,” he joked.

You felt his fingers hooking around the fabric of your panties, pushing it further to the side so you had your cunt fully exposed for him to see. The drumming of your heartbeat almost drowned out the low groan he produced at the sight of your flushed heat.

“Princess, your pussy is dripping so much…” Jungkook trailed off, one of his fingers tracing a line between your lips. He felt the urge to eat you out, to lick you completely clean and make you cum on his tongue, but he decided that would have to wait for a different time. “Is this all for me?”

“Yeah, all for you,” you said, weak. There was a thundering exasperation building up inside you, motivated from your denied orgasm and from the way that Jungkook was taking his sweet time.

“Good girl,” he mumbled and your chest was filled with pride. “Can’t wait to fuck it.”

“Then don’t wait,” you practically begged. “Just rush.”

He removed his finger from your heat. “Shh… be patient,” Jungkook told you and you swore you could practically hear the smile in his voice. You could hear him shuffling behind you, the sound of his zipper opening echoing around that still room. “I’m gonna give you whatever you want.”

You whined at the abrupt feeling of his warm cock rubbing between your folds, its tip hitting your clit after every languid thrust. “Fuck,” you cried out, shaky. Jungkook wasn’t lying when he said that he was big, his length was so thick that you were starting to get second thoughts whether you could take it or not. Not that you would ever admit it out loud. “Just put it in, Jungkook.”

But Jungkook was having way more fun just teasing you. “Pussy’s so wet for me.” He breathed out, his hands tightening around your hips. You felt him throb between your folds, and the sensation got you searching for air. “You’re soaking my cock, baby. You want it that much?”

“Y-Yeah.”

Jungkook hummed, leaning in so he could place a kiss on your shoulder. “I’m gonna fuck you like you deserve to be fucked, princess,” he promised, his length still rubbing between your folds. He was so hard and heavy that your mind was spinning, your lungs drowning in expectation. “Gonna fuck you so well that you’re never going to forget it. Do you want that?”

“Yes,” your voice was a pathetic moan, and you hated your body for betraying you so easily. “Yes, please.”

After another pec on your shoulder, Jungkook leaned back. “Be loud for me, alright?” He asked. “Can you do that for me?”

You swallowed hard — what were the chances that someone would hear you? You had no idea. “Yeah, whatever you want, just fuck me.”

“Whatever I want? That’s a dangerous thing to say.” He moved around behind you, making you flinch when you felt his cock align with your dripping entrance. The anticipation was driving you insane. “Might have to see if you’re up for it another time.”

There was an answer somewhere in your mind — you could swear there was — but it was quickly forgotten the second that Jungkook pushed himself inside you. The drag of his cock was a delicious torture, streching you out and filling you up to the brim until you were shaking under his touch, both of you moaning at the sensation.

“Oh my god.” You breathed out, hands turning into fists on the table. Your cheek was pressed against the polished wood, hot breath creating small white clouds on the surface.

Jungkook released a shaky sigh when he felt you clenching around him, your body desperately trying to move closer to him. “Fuck, baby,” he hissed, his hands holding onto your hips for dear life. Gradually, he moved himself away from your pussy just so he could slam back inside, marveling on the way you trembled at the feeling, crying out his name in the prettiest of whimpers. “Your pussy is so fucking tight. Squeezing my cock so well.”

Took you only an instant to realize that you were absolutely addicted to the feeling of his cock inside you, the heavenly push of his hardness in and out of you as he slowly started to set a pace. “Oh my god, I’m—” a pitiful hiccup interrupted you, turning your voice into a sharp cry. “That’s so good, Jungkook.”

Jungkook chuckled behind you, his thrusts starting to pick up speed. Your eyes closed in endless bliss, every part of your brain focused on the sensation of his fat length stretching you up. “Told you I’d be, not my fault you didn’t believe me,” he said, but you could tell that his confidence had started to wear itself thin — he, too, seemed to be much more focused on the way that your bodies met. “Do you touch yourself, princess?”

You almost didn’t know how to answer him, a deep heat rushing up to your cheeks. “W-What?”

“When you’re alone, baby,” he practically hissed. You were bouncing on the table then, your body jerking up and down as he fully pistoned his cock inside your heat. “Do you play with your little pussy?”

“Y-yes,” you stammered, embarrassed. “S-Sometimes.”

“Show me how you do it,” he requested in-between huffs, lust dripping from every syllable. Jungkook spoke to you like a siren, effortlessly inducting you to comply with everything he wanted. “Come on. Don’t be shy, I wanna see you play with yourself for me.”

You didn’t even know if what you were feeling was shyness, but there was a veil of hesitation that covered your actions. As your hands moved downwards, one of them clenching around the fabric of your dress and pulling it up while the other trailed over your mound, you felt strangely vulnerable, exposed. At the same time, you wanted to do what he asked you to, wanted him to wash you over with compliments until your mind was going blank.

So you closed your eyes and focused on the sensation of two of your fingers coating themselves in your wetness, then their pressure on your clit. You whined at the feeling, pleasure exploding in your veins as you started to rub yourself, tracing small circles on your sensitive spot. There was no way you could ever reach that sensation again, the sweet motions of your fingers combining perfectly with the thrusts of his hard, fat cock inside you. You were doomed.

“That’s it… just like that, baby,” Jungkook whispered, obsessed with the sensation of your walls fluttering around him. You had gotten so tight that he thought he would see heaven at any second now. “Feels good?”

“Y-Yeah, so good...” you struggled to get out, “feels amazing, Jungkook.”

“So perfect for me,” his praise shot straight up to your core, making you mewl under him. God, the way that you were tightening around him was going to drive him insane. “You feel so fucking good, I can’t stop fucking you.”

Jungkook took one of his hands to your neck, using it to guide your body upwards until you had your back pressed against his chest; his hot lips assaulting your neck. The new position made it so much easier for his cock to drill inside you, reaching even deeper and hitting sweet spots you didn’t even know you had. It wasn’t long before you were moaning out, eyes fluttering shut as the pleasure overtook you.

“Just take a look at that, baby,” his voice broke you out of your hypnotized state. “Look at you. Such a good slut, just taking everything I’m giving you, touching yourself for my cock… fuck. Could watch you like this forever.”

You had to take a moment to understand what he was talking about, and then you saw it: the window. It stood silently across the room from you, half open, and the glass combined with the darkness of the night gave a perfect reflection of the two of you. You could see yourself, the mess you had become, as Jungkook pounded in and out of you and your fingers worked on your clit; the darkness of his hungry gaze as he followed the motions of your body against his.

Even if you cried out at the sight, your body freezed up a little at the thought of someone walking by and seeing that private spectacle. The possibility itself was minimal — the window gave way to the side of the land, where a big, thick fence separated it from the nearby houses; most of the ground covered by large trees and bushes — but it wasn’t zero. You couldn’t even begin to imagine the humiliation that would come from being seen like that.

He, of course, noticed your change of demeanor right away, and you could see in the faint reflection that he had smirked at that realization. “What is it? Are you worried someone is going to walk by?” Jungkook almost groaned against your ear. His cock continued to pump ferociously in and out of you, and you couldn’t even understand your own thoughts for a moment. “That someone is gonna see you get fucked like a good slut?”

“It’s not—” a moan cut your sentence short. Not like you knew where you were heading, anyways.

“No one is gonna see you like this, know why?” Jungkook was grunting, his fingers tightening around your throat. You cried out at the feeling, your cunt clenching around him in a way that got him fucking you even harder. “Cause this is all for me. Just for me.”

Then he was pushing you back on the table, your chest crashing against the wooden surface and his hands yanking you by the waist. Jungkook was fucking you so hard that your worries left you as soon as they arrived, your mind a turmoil of desires and broken exclamations that didn’t give space to anything else but him.

“You look fucking gorgeous like this, stuffed with cock,” he marveled at the sight. There was a known wave of pleasure hovering over you, ready to crash at any given moment, and you stopped rubbing yourself just so you could prolong its arrival. “Wanna see you cum for me, make a mess for me, baby.”

The words left you in a confusing, broken order, “Jungkook, I can’t… too much… can’t...”

“Shhh, you can,” he was slowly easing you into your orgasm, his cock drilling in and out of your pussy. Jungkook fucked like a machine, fast and precise, and you didn’t think you’d be able to forget that anytime soon. “You told me you could take it, so now you’re gonna take it. Don’t you wanna be good for me?”

“I- I want to… I’m so close,” you cried out, pressing your forehead against the table. You didn’t know how it hadn’t broken yet, with the way that Jungkook was fucking you so mercilessly hard. “I’m so, so close.”

“Cream my cock, baby, come on,” he urged you on, his member throbbing inside you at the thought. Your legs were so weak that you knew you’d fall facedown on the floor if he wasn’t supporting your weight with his strong arms. “Be a good girl and cream my cock for me.”

And that was it. That was all that you needed to push yourself over the edge, submerging you in ecstasy and making you squeeze him so deliciously. “J-Jungkook!” You moaned out his name again and again, unsure of how loud you were being, but also not caring as much as you should. Jungkook realized he loved hearing you call his name more than anything else. “Fuck! Oh my god!”

“That’s it, baby,” he moaned back, his thrusts a sloppy, uncoordinated mess. He was hypnotized by the view of your cunt hugging him, your wetness dripping down your thighs as you rode out the last seconds of your orgasm. “Pussy’s so fucking tight, so fucking perfect— gonna cum too.”

You gasped out at the sensitivity that was starting to spread, every movement shaky as you tried to push yourself against him. “Yes, please.” You looked over your shoulder, meeting his hooded gaze. Jungkook looked like a god, his dark hair sweaty and messy and his lip trapped between his teeth. That image would plague you forever. “Cum inside me, please.”

He groaned loudly, eyes closing for a second. “Fuck, that’s so fucking hot,” he hissed, chest heaving with anticipation. You knew he was close, everything pointed to that, and all that you wanted was to see him reach his high, using your body like it was just a doll for him to fuck. “Didn’t know you’d want to be filled up with cum, princess.”

“I’m full of surprises.” You smiled — a pretty, fucked-out smile that got Jungkook grunting like a madman. “I want your cum inside me, Jungkook, please.”

“Gonna fuck you full of my cum, don’t worry— Shit.” The sounds he was making were heavily: those breathy, high-pitched moans that echoed all around you; broken by deep grunts that had your thighs shaking. Jungkook fucked himself in you like he was meant for it, throwing his head back and closing his eyes as he finally found his orgasm. “Fuck! That’s it, fuck—”

Jungkook called out your name and mixed it with praises and curses when he came, spilling himself inside your pussy. You sighed at the feeling, taking in the blissful sensation of having his hot cum spilling out of you, dripping down your legs as he continued to thrust inside you, milking out his orgasm.

At last, he started to wince from sensitivity. His body collided against your back, his heavy breathing fanning your neck as he tried to collect himself. “Fuck, baby,” he mumbled, “you’re amazing.”

“You’re not so terrible yourself.” You could not help the smile that appeared on your lips, nor the way that you melted against the surface of the table, drowning in his heat.

Still, you couldn’t stay there for much longer: it was already a miracle that no one heard the chaos going on in that room, and you weren’t trying to push your luck for the night. Especially since you had a pile of homework (and possibly — now cold — takeout) waiting for you at home.

You raised your body, leaning against your elbows. “I have to leave,” you told him, taking one of your hands to lay on top of his tattooed one, trying to ease his grip from your waist. “Now if you could just…”

“Shhh, shhh,” Jungkook hushed, unrelenting. He was much stronger than you, and your muscles were too weak for you to try and do much, so you eventually gave up. “Stop moving. Let me feel you around me for just a bit more.”

You frowned. “Why?”

“I like it,” he said simply. His breath was a faint caress against the skin of your neck, and you didn’t have much fight left in you. “We all have our tastes.”

You rolled your eyes. “You’re so weird.”

“Don’t kinkshame.” Jungkook pouted, then pressed a kiss against your shoulder. “You just begged me to fuck you in a church, remember?”

“Yeah, I guess I don’t have much place to judge.” You laughed dryly, then looked over your shoulder. “Why is your cock still hard? How long is this gonna take?”

Jungkook groaned, clearly annoyed. “Shut up and enjoy the moment.”

The so-called moment lasted about two more minutes (which was kind of impressive, you thought) before Jungkook softened and slipped out of you. You hated to admit but you kind of liked the feeling of having him still inside you, completing you as his lips danced around your neck; fingers tenderly playing with your hair. You never thought Jungkook would be so gentle after fucking you like that, but you guessed that you weren’t the only one that was full of surprises.

Jungkook, apparently, also liked to admire his work. After he had slipped out of you, he made you sit back on the table just so he could stare at his own cum dripping out of you, a glimmer of satisfaction in his dark gaze. He had pushed his white release back inside you and smirked up at you, asking, ever so kindly, for you to go home like that, filled with his cum.

You, of course, promptly accepted it.

“By the way,” he called when you two had already stepped out of the church, enveloped by the coldness of the night. There was only one solitary light pole illuminating his features, making him look like one of the saints in the chapel — nothing but fake advertisement, in your opinion. “Wanna know how much I got in that immunology test?”

“How much?” You asked.

“Eighty two.” Jungkook smiled brightly then, and you found yourself joining him. “Never saw a grade so high in my life. And that counts all the times I’ve cheated too.”

“Seems like the tutoring sessions are paying off.” You crossed your arms before your chest, the hem of your dress swirling around your knees. The night was weirdly peaceful after everything that had taken place.

“They are.” He nodded. “I’m looking forward to the next one. Helps that my tutor is kind of a hottie too.”

You scoffed. “So I’ve heard.”

“And, by the way?”

“Yeah?”

“You would look better without it.” He pointed at your dress, a sly smile already sprouting on his lips. “Hope to see it next time.”

“Good night, Jungkook.” You rolled your eyes, already turning around — yeah, like there would ever be a next time.

BAD INFLUENCE COLLECTION

TAGLIST:

@taehyungieskith @fan-ati--c @btstrasht @crazy4myself @sashimi-mochi @ft-multi @kooafraid @dianaaviny @ggukkieland @cryinginmypromdress @kissestothesky

#bts smut #jungkook smut #jungkook #bts #jungkook x reader #jungkook x you #jeon jungkook #bad boy au #smut #reader insert #bts x you #bts x reader #bad boy jungkook #bts au #jungkook au #series #pwp #fluff

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shewrites02 · 3 years ago

Text

Gone Too Long |Shikamaru x Reader|

Summary: Not having his partner around begins to toll on Shikamaru

Word count: 3k

Lady Tsunade was assigning weekly chores to all the Shinobi who had yet to be assigned a mission. Usually these tasks were reserved for Genin, but this week had been slow for the village. Many Chunin and Jonin were left task less aimlessly patrolling the village.

"Shikamaru, you'll assist Iruka at the Academy for the remainder of the week."

Shikamaru let out a long dreadful sigh before muttering "What a drag, that's so much work." Just above his breath.

Shikamaru complaining was not out of the ordinary, but him complaining in front of the Fifth Hokage was and everyone took notice. Lady Tsunade slowly looked up from her journal with her eyebrow slightly raised. She was offering Shikamaru a chance to apologize before she completely ripped into him like she often did with Naruto. But all he did was smack his lips and cross his arms against his chest.

"Forgive him Lady Tsunade, he gets like this whenever y/n is gone on a mission." Ino announced proudly as a devilish smile graced her lips.

The other ninjas futilely tried to suppress their laughter but soon the whole room erupted into a uncontrollable fit. Even Lady Tsunade's scowl had turned into a humorous smile. Shikamaru's face began to turn beat red as his fellow shinobi teased him.

"So that explains his nasty attitude this whole week. Me and Akamaru knew there was something up with you!" Kiba laughed after Akamaru barked, agreeing.

"I bet his attitude will change once he gets some... special attention" Tenten snickered.

This even warranted a light chuckle from the stoned face Shino Aburame.

"Special... Attention?" Naruto mumbled completely lost. as usual he wasn't paying any attention and the joke had gone completely over his head. Kiba leaned over and explained the joke as clearly as he could. It took Naruto probably a full minute before he caught on and laughed with the rest of them.

Shikamaru grumbled under his breath, but didn't argue. As much as he hated to admit it to his friends, not having you around severely impacted his day to day interactions. He was constantly irritated because he didn't get as much sleep with you gone. The side of the bed where you usually reside seemed like a gaping hole with you not there, and no matter how much tossing and turning he did he was never comfortable.

He was frustrated that he couldn't come home to you after a long day of working with idiots. Even if you did nothing but tell him to give his teammates a break he missed the sound of your voice soothing him. He missed laying in your arms while you lectured that not everybody was a genius like him. At this point he would settle for your hands just gracing his.

And most of all he was distracted by the crippling fear that one of these days you might not come home to him. Shikamaru undoubtedly knew that you could handle yourself. Yall had spared a couple times and you'd come close to beating him more than once. But the idea of not being there to protect you often left him feeling helpless.

With these thoughts constantly running through his mind, it was difficult to focus on the seemingly mundane tasks he was often given. To be honest the only times he wasn't thinking of you was when he was on his own missions, and even then his thoughts were reserved for keeping his squad alive and staying alive himself specifically to see you again.

"Well you'll be glad to know she's coming back today, I'll be expecting you to be in a better mood tomorrow!" Lady Tsunade teased before shushing the crowd and returning to give out assignments.

Just as Shikamaru had thought working at the academy was the exact mindless work he dreaded so much. They could've put him with the younger children, given him a challenge, well at least that's what he thought. Instead he supervised a group of kids around the ages of 9 to 11. These children were no stranger to Shikamaru or his legacy, actually any shinobi rumored to have amazing talent or great potential was a topic of discussion amongst the children in the academy. The stories they've heard of Shikamaru and the Nara clan as a whole were impressive enough to earn their respect. In fear of potentially earning themselves a bad name with someone they could possibly call their squad leader once graduating, They gave Shikamaru absolutely no problems.

"Shikamaru Sensei... is it true you forfeited your last match in the Chunin exams?!" A little boy shouted across the blacktop as he and a large number of his classmates came rushing towards the lazy uninterested ninja.

"Yeah, what about it?"

"I told you, Idiot!" A young girl exclaimed, hitting the previous boy in the back of the head with a scroll she had. "He was running out of Chakra and knew he couldn't finish the fight!"

The young girl's confident proclamation surprised Shikamaru. Every ninja in the village knew the story, but very few knew the reasoning behind his actions. Usually the only ones who accurately recounted the story were those who saw the match with their own eyes.

"Who told you that?" Shikamaru inquired.

"Y/n Sensei told our whole class the story the last time she came to the academy, had all of us try to figure out why you'd throw a match that you practically had won. She said it's her favorite story to tell students who are about to graduate."

"Yeah she said it's still the most amazing match she's watched during the Chunin exams, even now!"

"She told us that if we wanna be half the ninja you are, we always have to be thinking two steps ahead."

Shikamaru couldn't stop that infamous smirk from creeping onto his face. He loved hearing that you spoke to your class about him, that you even bragged about how talented he was, even if it was to a bunch of children. You admired him not only for the person he is, but the ninja he's become and that was a great honor to Shikamaru.

"Look, it's y/n Sensei, she's back from her mission!" The little girl from before yelled pointing over at the village's entrance. All the children fervently yelled your name in a vain attempt to get your attention. The academy laid on hill that allowed them to peer down at the entire village, though they could see you, you could not see them.

Shikamaru acting as if he too were one of your students rushed to the fence to see if they were correct, if finally the love of his life had returned home. Sure enough right alongside Kakashi and Tsume there you were. Your smile is as bright as ever despite having a few minor scrapes and bruises. Butterflies filled the pit of Shikamaru's stomach and what was just a sly smirk had turned into a full blown smile, teeth and all. He's heart fluttered, but skipped a beat at the same time it was like he had seen you for the first time.

"Go ahead, class is wrapping up anyway!" Iruka whispered over to him.

Shikamaru was stunned, he was so entranced by the sight of you he was completely ignorant to his surroundings. For the first time since he graduated from the Academy he had let Iruka sneak up on him. Your being gone had even a greater hold on him than he initially thought. He needed to see you right now.

He thankfully patted Iruka on his back before darting off toward the exit. He knew you'd first go to Ichirkau Ramen to pick up dinner for the two of you, a tradition set in place to celebrate a successful mission. So if he could move quick enough he could make it to the flower shop and back to the apartment the two of you shared before you. He did not want a cold empty uninviting apartment to be what greeted you once you returned home, especially after seeing you had endured wounds while on your mission. Honestly he didn't want you to have to worry about a thing.

Once he fumbled into the door, he immediately began to prepare for your arrival. He lit every candle he could find and arranged them around the perimeter of the bathroom while the water for a hot bath drew. He even went as far as to place rose petals in the water. Something he never understood but knew you would appreciate. When that was handled he placed one of his t-shirts on the counter and dimmed the lights. He could hear your footsteps approaching down the hall.

His nonchalant nature made it absolutely impossible for him to display any type of excitement or anticipation willingly. Due to this he sprinted back to living snatching up a book that was left on the coffee table and pretended to read it as you walked into the room.

He lowered the book just below his nose being careful to conceal the wide tooth smile he had behind those pages.

"You're home." He announced very casually.

You laughed. He never exceeded those two words when it came to welcoming you back, never a "I missed you" or "I'm so excited to see you" always those two words. When you first started dating such a dull response hurt your feelings, you wanted him to be jumping for joy to see you. Now the promise of hearing those two words was the primary motivation in completing your missions.

"And look, ramen!" You squealed slightly shaking the bag.

Shikamaru glanced over at the bag then returned his gaze to his book. You scoffed slightly offended, this was your favorite part of coming home, pigging out on loads of ramen after eating forest food for a week. Shikamaru knew this! He'd let you recite the details of your mission to him while he attentively listened, it was when you explained all the scrapes and bruises you inevitably always returned with.

"Go get cleaned up so we can eat." He demanded eyes still glued to that stupid book.

Your face fell, that childish giddy smile now wiped clean away. Shikamaru had never had a problem sharing at least a quick meal with you before you hopped in the shower. You were well aware of the toll half a day's walk had on one's body, but was this your boyfriend's crude way of telling you, you smelled. You sat the ramen on the dining room table not bothering to suppress the pout on your face.

Shikamaru got a glimpse of your expression out the side of his eye and immediately felt guilty. Perhaps there was a better way of getting you in the bathroom to see his surprise for you. One that hadn't made you feel so self conscious or small. For such a genius he made some stupid mistakes.

He placed his book on the coffee table to meet you in the kitchen. Bypassing the food he snuck behind you, creeping his arms around your waist before planting a small soft kiss on your cheek. Shikamaru snuggled his head into your neck before speaking.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to be so crass." He mumbled against your skin. "But I do have a surprise for you in the bathroom."

You perked up at the mention of a surprise. A wide grin sneaking on your lips as the scowl you held earlier dissipated. Shikamaru had always been a thoughtful boyfriend even if he was so coy in his interactions with you. He'd fill the apartment with roses for your anniversary , then downplay the extravagant act when you walked in the door. He once planned an entire surprise birthday party for you just to spend the entire night proclaiming he barely did anything. You were excited to see what considerate display your partner had put together this time.

You let out a small gasp as you walked into the romantically decorated bathroom. The dim candles created such a relaxed yet intimate ambiance to the entire space. You chuckled some at the rose petals. Despite the countless lectures both you and Ino had received on how pointless it was to pick the petals off of roses when a person could simply just give their partner a bouquet of roses, he still included them in your warm bath.

"Shika... you didn't have to do all this."

"It was nothing." He reassured disregarding the full speed sprint from the academy to the Yamanaka flower shop, then to the apartment. "Here let me help you."

Shikamaru assisted you in removing your garments. He knew how even the smallest tasks could bring out the failure's in your body after such a long mission. Something as simple as slipping out of a pair of cargoes seemed like a feat to a body so sore from what felt like an endless battle. He let you grasp onto his forearm before dipping into the tub and sinking shoulder deep. The warm water against your ailing body felt almost euphoric. As usual Shikamaru knew exactly what you needed.

Of course your generous boyfriend could not stop there, running you a bath was not enough. He was going to bathe you himself too. Tenderly rubbing the dirt and grime from every cut and scrape on your body.

"How'd you get this one?" a question he asked ever so often. His tone is always dull and irritated.

Shikamaru hated to see you covered in bruises. You called them a causality of the job, but to him they were just a sign that he wasn't there to protect you. He would try to ignore the small ones, but any that seemed too deep or painful he felt obligated to inquire about. Although he never liked the answer. That's probably why wiping away your wounds was so therapeutic for him. If he couldn't prevent the pain, at least he could alleviate it now.

"A shuriken hit me, cheap shot." You huffed.

Your boyfriend's face didn't soften, in fact you were sure you saw him actually grimace at the mention of you getting hit. You wondered why he even tortured himself asking questions he didn't want the answer to. Nonetheless you weren't going to let some small injuries ruin your first night home.

"Rumor around the village is you missed me a whole lot while I was away. "

Shikamaru's cheeks instantly flushed as he averted his eyes away from you. He rubbed the back of his neck nervously as a few unsure chuckles fell from his mouth. He was searching for the words to say.

"I ran into Naruto at Ichiraku's, he said you had such an attitude with all of them. Heard you even snapped at Lady Tsunade you missed me so much."

"Damn, Naruto!" He mumbled underneath his breath. "You mess up my whole routine when you leave!"

You let out an exaggerated sigh at the tired excuse.

"Give it up Nara, you missed me!"

Reluctantly the shadow ninja accepted defeat. He laced his now wet hands with yours and brought them to his lips. He planted a trail of endearing kisses up your arm to your elbow before gently returning your hand to the soothing water.

"I'm a mess when you're not here. I swear you occupy so much space in my brain, I can't even think straight. I miss you so much."

The revelation caught you off guard. Maybe it was his lustful entrance of finally having you home after a month, but Shikamaru very rarely was this vulnerable with you. Such words blossomed butterflies in your stomach. It was as if Shikamaru was confessing his feelings for you for the very first time.

"I love you so much y/n."

"I Love you too."

The two of you feel into a comfortable silence. Shikamaru stood to grab you a dry towel. Reluctant you feel deeper into the water, Although drawing colder you couldn't imagine getting out the tub just yet. After all it had been weeks since you allowed yourself to be pampered in such a way. You wanted to savor every moment.

"God, this feels so good." You moaned in pleasure.

Shikamaru raised an eyebrow at your blissful proclamation, that infamous smirk plastered on his face. He approached the tub, abandoning the towel on the counter, and kneeled behind you. He snaked his hand up your torso, fondling you some before they landed at your neck. You'd have let out a small gasp if the familiar feeling of his fingers lightly squeezing your throat hadn't completely knocked the air out of you. He kissed his way from behind your ear down to the base of your neck.

"I can make you feel better."

The next morning the two of you found yourselves in Lady Tsunade's office, along with your comrades. As usual the Fifth Hokage was assigning daily tasks, when her eyes fell upon Shikamaru. His demeanor was clearly different from yesterday, His hands had returned to his pockets and his scowl had been replaced with a content grin.

"You seem to be in better spirits Shikamaru." Tsunade announced inquisitively. "I assume you've resolved that issue of yours?"

The other shinobi snickered at her insinuation. The attention made both you and Shikamaru look down at the floor hoping it would open up and consume you two whole. Shikamaru rubbed the back of his neck, eyes closed before answering.

"Yes Ma'am."

#shikamaru imagine #shikamaru x y/n #shikamaru x you #shikamaru x reader #shikamaru #shikamaru nara #fan fic #fanfic #naruto #naruto shippuden #konoha 11

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plus-size-reader · 4 years ago

Text

Personal

Peter Hayes x Plus size!reader

Word Count: 1846 words

Warnings: none

Summary: The reader learns that she is in Peter’s fear landscape

—————————————————————————————————

You didn’t know much about the other initiates' fear landscapes until today, when you were going to be going through your final simulations in front of everyone else.

It was designed that way.

Sharing your deepest fears was far from anything done at Dauntless, mostly because it was much too personal, but this was the one exception. This was how you got into Dauntless, how you proved yourself, and you were willing to do whatever it took.

Even if you might not have chosen to share with them had you given a choice. You were pretty reserved to begin with, doing your best to just get through this without drawing too much attention to yourself.

You wanted to be Dauntless, but that didn’t mean you wanted everyone in the compound to know everything about you. Thankfully though, of all the fear landscapes that had been displayed today, yours was far from the most memorable.

At least, for you.

The ceremony was over now, and you were pretty confident that you had done well. The process was a relatively simple one, as uncomfortable as it could be, and it was over before you had really processed what was going on.

You were lucky.

Most of your fears were standard, shared with others in your troupe, but even the ones that weren’t super common didn’t raise any red flags.

For you, the most shocking thing of all was getting to see everyone else’s fears and the things that they hated more than anything else. You didn’t get really personal with any of them in all your time here, so it was interesting to see.

There was just something about seeing someone actively interacting with their greatest fears that told you more about them than any words ever could. In that moment, all they were thinking about was getting out, and that made them impulsive.

It was real.

There was no need to save face in a do or die situation like that.

Though, that didn’t exactly answer all the questions you had that words may have helped to clarify. After all, less than an hour ago, Peter was hooked up to that monitor, the screen showing his deepest, darkest fears without fail.

To start, it seemed like his landscape was going to be just like everyone else’s, which you had to admit you were a little disappointed by. For whatever reason, you had a special interest in Peter’s landscape, because for the life of you, you just couldn’t figure him out.

From one moment to the next, talking to him could be like talking to two different people. He was guarded and hard to read, but having come from Candor, that only reminded you of home.

His standoffish and rude personality didn’t put you off in the least, because when you stopped to think about it, that was just how people acted where you came from. It was normal for you, just like it was normal for him.

However, you never would have thought Peter cared for you at all. As much as you enjoyed his refreshing company and attitude, you doubted he gave your existence much thought at all, he certainly didn’t act like he did.

As best you could tell, he found you just as inconsequential as everyone else here, like it didn’t matter if you stayed or not.

Though, you did have to rethink that as soon as you heard a familiar voice on the screen in front of you. Just thinking about it, you felt a familiar flip in your stomach from that moment, when you looked up to see yourself there.

Initially, you assumed that you must have been mistaken, that it wasn’t you in his landscape at all, but there was really no way to deny it.

The girl there was you, laying on the concrete floor of the pit, clearly bleeding from some kind of wound though you weren’t exactly sure what had happened. All you knew was that something had happened and you were hurt, bad.

...And Peter was panicking.

Even when he was sitting, in the center of the room, you could tell that he was in some kind of distress. He was practically dripping sweat, the muscles in his jaw tense as he took a second to survey the sight in front of him.

It was clear that he’d been here before.

You weren’t sure when something like this would have become part of his fear landscape but the way he dealt with it made it obvious he knew what he needed to do. You weren’t doing well, and there was nothing he could do to change that.

He had to let you go.

The landscape had closed out with Peter turning his back and leaving the room, where presumably, you would die. In all honesty, it was hard to watch in the moment but now that it had passed, you were confused.

Peter had never even given the impression that he enjoyed your company, led alone the fact that he actively worried about something happening to you. It didn’t make any sense, but you couldn’t exactly go get answered.

You weren’t sure how he would react.

It wasn’t like you could just walk up to him and demand answers for what he’d done there, could you? That was something a Candor would do, sure, but you weren’t Candor anymore. This wasn’t as cut and dry as it would have been before.

He didn’t owe you an explanation, you knew that, but the more you sat here, the more your head was spinning, coming up with all these outlandish explanations for what you were doing there.

Maybe it was a mistake? Maybe it just happened to be you but had never been before? Maybe it wasn’t you at all.

You liked to think that you would recognize yourself if you saw your face on a screen, but in that moment, you were still rattled from your own freak landscape so it could have just been a misunderstanding.

Couldn’t it?

Choosing to believe that would have brought you the most comfort, but the actions of the other initiates told you that wasn’t an option. They had been staring at you since this morning, talking in hushed whispers about it.

You knew they had to be.

Besides, even if you hadn’t been so perceptive to the truth, Molly had all but told you that was the case when you passed her.

Eventually, you decided that the only choice you had was to get answers from him. You couldn’t just let everyone else talk about you without even knowing what was going on yourself. If nothing else, you could find out what Peter was thinking.

At the very least, you would be able to put any rumors to rest and move on.

He had to have something to say for himself.

You weren’t entirely sure how you were going to lead up to this conversation with Peter, but the nuances didn’t matter all that much . Worst case, he would tell you that what had happened was none of your business and you would know where you stood.

The last thing on your mind was hurting his feelings or offending him, which was why as soon as you sat down beside him in the dormitory space, you didn’t bother explaining yourself.

Instead, you sat down right next to him on his cot, “What was that all about this morning? Why was I in your fear landscape?” you questioned, not bothering to soften the rough tone in your voice as you waited for him to speak.

It was bleak, sure, and not polished in the least but that was one of the things you enjoyed most about knowing Peter came from Candor as well. You didn’t have to worry about refining your approach like you did now that you were in Dauntless.

He was used to that way of speaking.

Still, he wasn’t exactly thrilled to have to have this conversation. After all, he had been doing well enough at keeping his feelings for you under wraps, but that whole thing at the ceremony was going to make that a little harder.

How was he supposed to deny it? Obviously he cared for you enough that the threat of something happening to you had become something he actively feared.

That didn’t really happen with people you just knew.

“I don’t know. You think I have any control over what happens in those?” he shrugged, hoping that he could keep up the plausible deniability thing for long enough that you would just get up and go back to whatever it was you were doing.

It was harsh, much more aggressive than he meant for it to come out, but similarly to how he paid your mannerisms no mind, you didn’t even blink an eye.

“Come on Peter, I know you know better than that” you hummed, taunting him a little now that you were here. Clearly, he was going to try and make you feel like you had no right to be here but that was very wrong.

You knew as well as he did that he had full control over the things he cared about and the things that worried him. Somehow, you had made it on to that list, you knew that for sure, all you were asking him was how or why?

He knew why you were there, he just didn’t want to tell you.

“What does it matter? You saw how it ended for you, it’s far from romantic” he grumbled, turning to look at you with an almost incriminating look in his eyes.

He was doing his best to figure out how he could get out of this without going too far, but it didn’t seem to be going that way.

Trying to keep it up wasn’t getting him anywhere.

The idea that it should have been romantic was funny to you, considering the fact that it was a fear landscape in the first place, but you got what he was talking about. It wasn’t like you could draw any connections based on what happened.

However, you knew that the fact it was you in that scene meant something. It could have been anyone dying on the floor, but it wasn’t, it was you.

“Admitting you have a crush on me isn’t going to kill you” you prompted finally, taking a stab in the dark after all the beating around the bush he was doing. You didn’t want to say anything about him, not directly, but you knew the truth.

He felt the same way for you as you did for him.

“Maybe not, but I would have liked to do it in a way that didn’t involve you bleeding out” he shrugged, a small smile creeping on to his lips.

This wasn’t how Peter saw this whole thing happening between you but he figured that it was better late than never. At least now, you knew just how desperate he was to always have you by his side.

#peter hayes #dauntless #divergent #the divergent series #peter hayes x reader #peter hayes x ps reader #peter hayes x plus size reader #peter hayes imagine #dauntless x reader #dauntless x ps reader #dauntless x plus size reader #dauntless imagine #divergent x reader #divergent x ps reader #divergent x plus size reader #divergent imagine

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lokiskitten · 3 years ago

Note

could you please do one where the reader seduces him at a public place / dinner , and leaves him really frustrated and turned on , and he can't even react , but the reader gets it back once they get home

Tom Hiddleston | public teasing

Tom Hiddleston x fem!reader

plot : for your first year anniversary, Tom decided to take you out on a romantic date. However, you find a way to distract your mind from the presence of the paparazzis by physically teasing your boyfriend. Once the two of you get home, the man is finally able to teach you a lesson.

warnings : verbal teasing, public teasing, smut, dirty talking, light bondage, spanking, unprotected sex.

Today marked the one year anniversary of both you and your lovely boyfriend Tom. You absolutely adored him, especially as he constantly filled you with happiness no matter his busy schedule. Through filming and attending set, Tom always made sure to shoot you a few texts in order to reassure your anxiety and to make sure that you knew how much he loved you. His fame tended to disturb you at first, but time had allowed you to get used to the intrusive media and paparazzis. Besides, Tom always made sure to keep you out of the spotlights as much as he could.

But tonight, another priority turned out to be more important than avoiding the press. Your boyfriend had decided to take you out for dinner to a fancy restaurant, making sure that everything would be perfect for you to enjoy. You felt excited indeed, but anxiety still bubbled in your stomach due to the constant fear of being photographed against your will.

Sitting down at the fancy table, your elbows rested against the edge of the table whilst your palms anxiously rubbed against one another. Your orbs scanned the candle which stood between you and your boyfriend, this romantic detail truly dipping you into the mood for some extra wine. Tom was going on with his meal, cutting his steak with the help of his fork and knife whilst you found yourself lost in your thoughts. Quickly enough, the grown man noticed how dizzy you looked and couldn’t help but put his stencils down.

“Hey, sweetheart?” He asked before passing his napkin against his lips. Your eyes diverted up towards him, eyebrow raising slightly whilst your hand reached out for your glass of wine. “What would you think about going to the park tomorrow? I heard there’s gonna be lovely weather.” Tom stated, sincerely doubting that this stupid statement would change anything to your anxious mindset. His large hand reached out for yours, thumb rubbing against the back of your hand in order to bring warmth to ease your physical distress.

You simply shrugged though allowed Tom’s hand to take yours, finding comfort in his touch. “I’m sorry.. this was supposed to be a lovely night. I just feel anxious.” You explained, putting your glass down before pulling your hand away in order to grab your own stencils. You finally began to eat, enjoying how nice this food tasted which wasn’t surprising seeing how fancy and elegant this place was. “I understand. But hey, it’s just us right now.” Tom affirmed confidently before going back to eating his meal just like you were doing.

Upon hearing this sentence, your eyes looked up at his focused facial features as mischievous thoughts built up in your mind. At least, it helped you think about something else than the potential presence of the paparazzis. “Just us?..” you asked on an innocent tone whilst your foot gently started to brush against his clothed ankle. Feeling the unexpected sensation against his leg, Tom looked up at you with rather confused eyes. Though this didn’t stop you, in contrary, it only enhanced your inner mischief.

Progressively, your foot moved up to his inner thigh before starting to press against his crotch, gently massaging his prominent bulge as if the two of you were sitting in your living room. Tom immediately reached underneath the table, taking ahold of your ankle in order to put to an end your teasing mannerisms. He looked to his left and then to his right, a happy grin now appearing onto your face upon seeing the distress of your boyfriend. Tom then settled his eyes on you as his large hand squeezed your ankle as a way of begging you to stop this evil action.

“What are you doing?” He whispered whilst leaning in gently, serious eyes staring into your soul. You giggled, biting down onto your tongue in order to stop yourself from laughing too loudly and avoid to attract attention on the two of you. Tom noticed that you were in a playful mood, a smirk now appearing onto his face as he decided to give in your little game and allow you to believe that you had won. Noticing this detail you agreed to pull your foot away, delicately resting it back onto the floor before taking a sip of your beverage.

[ ... ]

About a hour later, the two of you had now arrived back home, a yawn escaping your open mouth as you allowed your keys to fall down into the pot which was in the entrance of the apartment. “Jesus.. I feel absolutely exhausted. I’m so full.” You affirmed tiredly before stretching your arms whilst Tom hung his jacket onto the coat hanger. However, before you could even reach for the living room, you found yourself being suddenly pushed against the wall by none but your beloved boyfriend.

A giggle escaped your lips as your brain understood what this was all about, Tom’s stern look being enough to make you understand that he was now getting revenge for what you had previously done back at the restaurant. Guttural groans echoed behind his closed lips, blue eyes scanning your body as his head titled hungrily. You continued to playfully giggle, arms attempting to move up to his shoulders though without ever succeeding due to his own arms being in the way. This was a game the two of you had progressively developed throughout your relationship, a personal kink you both enjoyed to involve during intercourses.

“You deserve proper punishment.” Tom affirmed as his blue eyes finally looked up at yours, his facial features remaining strict. You knew that your part of the job was to refrain from putting up an attitude nor laughing, yet you couldn’t help but smile due to your playful mood which was progressively taking over your body and senses. Taking ahold of your arm, the man dragged you all the way up to the bedroom in a hurry, closing the door behind the two of you for extra privacy even though no one else stood in this shared apparement of yours. When Tom set you free, you stepped back towards the bed as you watched your boyfriend tear open his fancy shirt.

The buttons fell onto the floor, though Tom didn’t truly care as he knew that he had a bunch of other shirts waiting for him in his closet. You bit down onto your bottom lip, head tilting in a teasing manner as you waited for the grown man to finally give you the punishment you deserved. Approaching your silhouette, his hands pushed you down onto the bed before he took the initiative to remove his belt. Not once did you flinch, being fully aware that your boyfriend would never do anything to hurt you and that not even unintentionally. Tom took ahold of your ankles and dragged you close to his body and immediate reach, using the leather product in order to lock your hands together for good.

With you being at his mercy, a mischievous smirk now appeared onto Tom’s face as he looked down at you. “Look at you now...” he began, head tilting in awe. “Not so fierce anymore, huh? Do you still feel like teasing me?” The man questioned, earning nothing from you but a simple smile. He squinted his eyes, brain thinking about all the things he wanted to do to you. Meanwhile, his veiny hand brushed against your elevated knee, sending chills down your spine. Both of his hands suddenly reached down for your shirt, tearing it apart with the help of his natural strength he had previously used to reap open his own upper piece of clothing.

You yelped, chest now exposed to him as warmth started to build up in your needy crotch. You wanted him; you absolutely needed him. “My sweet girl.” He affirmed before flipping you around onto your stomach. Your bum was now exposed to him, his hand reaching down for your hips which he gripped in order to pull your ass upwards. This position felt uncomfortable, but you remained patient as you knew how good it would turn out to feel once your boyfriend would finally be rocking his hips against yours. “I’ll teach you what it costs to tease me in public.” Tom promised as his hand caressed and made its way up your back.

“Do the loki voice-!” You began only to be brutally interrupted by the sensation of Tom’s hand squeezing the back of your head. “No talking.” He ordered, the familiar mischievous tone answering your demand which caused a smirk to appear on your face. This specific tone was something thousands of girls dreamt to be submitted to, yet only you was able to enjoy it live and stereo. Besides, Tom secretly enjoyed it too. You giggled, allowing your boyfriend to carry on with his own plans which you would gladly accept to submit to.

Finally, Tom took the initiative to pull your pants and underwear down to your mid thighs, exposing your wet cunt to his sight and the lustful air which filled the room. You moaned, betraying the fact that you were indeed enjoying this little session of pure revenge. Again, Tom chuckled darkly. His fingers moved down to your moist entrance, gently rubbing up and down your slit in order to properly spray the wetness around before starting to focus onto your clit. He teased it for a couple of seconds, rubbing circles against the hard bud which was meant to hide underneath its protective hood.

You moaned, head tilting back slightly before Tom decided to pull his fingers away from your core. Pouting sadly face to this disappointment, your head turned to the side in a desperate attempt to see what the man was now doing. Unfortunately, this gesture didn’t turn out to be any successful. He was now working on removing his own pants, allowing the piece of clothing to fall down to his ankles as his hardening cock was set free. His tip brushed against your wet slit, his warmth mixing with yours as pants started to escape his parted lips.

“Tommy..” you whimpered submissively, earning a harsh spank against your naked bum for stepping past his main rule. He shushed you, his thumb and index finger taking a gentle hold of his shaft in order to properly guide it into your wetness. Spreading your swollen lips with the help of his other hand, Tom managed to ease himself inside of you rather easily, the sensation of his hardness sliding inside of your core causing you the moan out of relief. You probably wouldn’t have been able to handle waiting any longer.

“Ahh-.. such a dirty girl.” He praised, hands now moving away from both of your respective genitals in order to take a firm hold of your hips. Tom was soon to reach balls deep, brushing past most of your sensitive spots and causing your legs to tremble gently. He felt indulgent enough to offer you a couple of seconds to adjust to his size- even though you’ve felt it plenty of times by now, which he was aware of. The thrusting process was soon to occur, gaining in confidence and harshness as seconds passed by.

Tom winced and moaned lustfully, still holding onto your hips as if his life depended on it. You added up to the melody by allowing your own moans to escape your lips, enjoying the way his tip repetitively rubbed against your g-spot and hit your cervix. Your joint hands gripped onto the bedsheets, eyelids shutting close so that your brain would be fully able to enjoy what was going on and building up in your lower abdomen. “Fuck- your going to make me cum sooner than...” Tom stated through his winces, abs contracted as he continued to thrust in and out of you.

Before the two of you could know it, Tom’s shaft throbbed and clenched, semen spraying out of his urethra and landing against your pulsating cervix. You moaned in awe, Tom towering over your body as his hands now fell beside your head. His digits clenched against the bedsheets, guttural moans escaping his shaky lips as he didn’t refrain from ejaculating all of his sperm inside of your stretched wetness. Your bum moved up against his hips, enhancing the intense contact whilst your boyfriend took time to properly wash his orgasm away.

Once he was finally done coming inside of you, the older man pulled out and allowed his tired body to fall down onto the bed besides your recovering self. The two of you panted, your body relaxing against the bed sheets as it was now your mind’s turn to recover from this intense intercourse.

I hope you guys enjoyed this! Feel free to leave a request. ❤️

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221bshrlocked · 4 years ago

Text

taste you on my tongue

Pairing: The Mandalorian (Din Djarin) x Reader

Words: 9441 (I can’t fucking write anything shorter I’m sorry)

Warnings: Angst and Smut. Helmet is on and then it’s off. Oral (male receiving). Soft then rough sex. Breeding kink. Touch kink. Hand kink? Dirty/Sweet Talk. Mando feels primal when he sees you wearing his shirt and flirting with someone that isn’t him.

Summary: The Revenant was a fairly spacious gunship compared to others and you prided yourself in keeping it running for this long, especially after you were told it would soon lose its “life force.” But when a certain Mandalorian and his foundling join your ship following a disastrous mission, you find that the Revenant isn’t as big as you initially thought. In fact, it is much less private than you wish to admit and you find yourself escaping to a cantina one night to avoid the bounty hunter who isn’t aware of the effect he has on you. The problem is, the Mandalorian doesn’t like to share anything with anyone, and that rule applies to you. Unfortunately (or perhaps luckily) for you, you learn about this rule the hard way.

A/N: I hope yall like these because I’m currently spiraling down a Din Djarin hole and I’m not remotely apologetic. Let me know how it is in the comments and how I can make the smut better or the characterization better. Please, I can’t improve unless yall tell me what I’m doing wrong. Also, I promise to write more smut than angst next time. Enjoy :) And @purple-mango sorry it wasn’t as rough as you probably hoped, I was feeling soft Din but mark my words, the next one will be rough.

The obnoxious laughter coming from one of the corners of the cantina made you shake your head as the tavern-keeper approached you and motioned towards your glass. He smiled when you enthusiastically nodded and held out the finished drink, silently asking him to pour some more of the Tevraki whiskey because there was nothing you wanted more than to forget the past few months.

Well, that wasn’t entirely true. There was something, or rather someone, that you wanted more than your need to set aside what’s been going on since that shitshow of a showdown on Tatooine. Coincidentally, or perhaps ironically, that someone had to do with what happened on the desert planet. You smiled at the man in front of you who knew better than to argue about how many drinks you’ve downed thus far.

As the thoughts slithered back to the source of your frustration, you couldn’t help but let your eyes take in your surroundings, shamelessly hoping to find someone who could fill that deep-seated need seeping through your chest and into your heart. No one would compare to him of course, and you knew that very well. But you couldn’t stand another hour on that ship without scratching that itch that’s been bothering you ever since he joined your ship with that annoyingly cute green goblin. You took a sip and returned your attention to the man wiping down the counter in front of you, already thinking of just skipping all the pleasantries and going back to his place.

“If you point him out to me, I can pay him a visit later and roughen him up a bit.” He leaned over and pointed behind you, pouring himself a shot of some weird blue drink before moving in closer to you again.

“Sorry?” You furrowed your eyebrows in confusion, not understanding what he was referring to or if you had even begun a conversation with him.

“The sleemo that rejected you sweetheart. Why else would you be drowning in my best stuff?” He winked at you and you barely managed to not visibly gag at the ways his eyes raked over your form. Did he think this was the way to flirt?

“Maybe I just love drinking liquid fire, sweetheart. Have you thought of that?” You hoped you weren’t being too sarcastic with him because if there was the slightest chance of getting laid tonight, then you were going to do everything in your power to take it and run considering how there was no chance of you asking your now-permanent “roommate” for those kinds of services.

“Maybe. Either way, I’d love to help you forget about that sucker.” You took a deep breath and willed yourself to not punch him in the eye because the thought of being able to forget about the beskar-clad bounty hunter, even for a few hours only, sounded incredibly pleasant.

“Oh aren’t you sweet? So selfless and confident too.” You forced a smile before downing the rest of the whiskey and tapping on the glass again. If you were going to get fucked by someone like him, you needed at least three more drinks or else you wouldn’t be able to imagine the Mandalorian in his place. You chuckled at the depressing thought because here you were trying to forget about the man himself and yet went out of your way to make sure you were sort of able to pretend he was the one showing you the stars.

“Believe me darling, my intentions are strictly...honorable.” He poured you another drink and took a shot with you, his eyes widening in shock when you didn’t bother to wait another second before downing the whole glass in one go.

“Damn baby, he hurt you that bad?” You raised an eyebrow at his inquiry and didn’t know why the question bothered you so much. As much as you hated to admit it, the answer was a hard yes.

“Hah, hurt doesn’t even begin to cover it. And you know what the worst part is? He doesn’t even know he’s doing it.” You didn’t bother to ask him for another drink, jumping on top of the counter before leaning down and grabbing the whiskey bottle from the shelf right in front of his knees.

“You mean he’s still here?” He didn’t question your behavior, letting you take a long sip from the bottle before smiling down at your dazed expression.

“Here. There. Everywhere. He’s fucking everywhere all the damn time. I...he’s- maker...I can’t get him out of my kriffing mind. And the funny thing is, he probably doesn’t waste a second of thought on me. I’m just...someone with a fucking ride that can get him from one planet to the next.” You traced random patterns on the cold tile of the counter and didn’t realize that someone had occupied the seat just opposite of you and trying his hardest to ignore the way the patrons across the room continued to stare at you like you were a piece of meat.

“Darling, he isn’t worth your time. You need someone that...appreciates you. Tells you how good you’ve been.” You knew the man in front of you was just saying those lovely things to get in your pants but you couldn’t help the next few words from stopping even if you tried.

“Yes...gods, yes. Yes I do. But I wanted him to appreciate me. I wanted him to tell me how good I’ve been. I can’t blame him for not bothering to thank me though because it’s hard for him to hold a conversation longer than five minutes. I get that, he’s not used to it, he hasn’t needed to for so long. But it wouldn't hurt to acknowledge me every once in a while you know. I mean, do you know anyone else who’d willingly put their entire life on hold just to help some random introvert and his child find their way through this kriffing shithole of a system?” You knew you shouldn’t be saying any of those things out loud, let alone to a complete stranger. But he struck a nerve and you couldn’t take not another minute of not telling anyone how you truly felt. You needed to get some things off your chest and you sure as hell weren’t about to complain to the man waiting for you back on the ship.

“And- and do you know anyone that would readily give up their most valuable position in this world to a stranger they just met? I don’t.” You violently shook your head at him and felt your eyes fill with tears when you saw the way the man was looking at you. His eyes shot down to the bottle in your hand and you unceremoniously raised it to your lips before taking a long swig of the burning liquid, hoping by some miracle that this was enough to make you forget all about his stupid strut and his annoyingly low and gruff voice and the way he was so effortlessly kind to the kid.

“That ship. It’s- oh gah, it’s been with me through the worst fucking jobs. I fought for it, almost sold my kriffing bo-...almost sold something priceless to ensure it isn’t taken from me again. And it only takes some damn beskar-wearing, quiet, fucking who-knows-what-species nerfherder to save me once for me to voluntarily hand it over to him. Like it wasn’t a piece of me...like it wasn’t my home.” You were over sharing at this point and you noticed the way the man was beginning to lose interest in you so you made sure to grab his shirt and pull him closer to you before grabbing his forearm and digging your nails into it to keep his attention.

“Have you heard of the Revenant? You must have heard of the Revenant. There is no way you haven’t-”

“Yes, yes. I’ve heard of it.” He was exasperated but continued to attend to you, shamelessly letting his eyes follow a drop of whiskey roll down your shirt in between the valley of your breasts. You fixed your posture, pushing your tits together and giving him an eyeful of skin before ranting to him again.

“That’s my baby. My pride and joy. I always made sure everyone at the dock knew who it belonged to. Know why?” You grabbed his hand and pulled on it to make sure he was listening to you, laughing when he tiredly leaned down and forced himself to look away from your sweaty chest to your eyes.

“Enlighten me sweetheart.”

“Because it’s one of the biggest gunships out there. So much space that I don’t actually use. It’s a fucking beauty...but you know what? It’s all a lie. A sad, unfortunate lie. Because it took me spending the better half of the year with that kid and his tincan of a guardian to realize just how small it is. It’s like he put his mark on every corner of my home on purpose...just to drive me insane. Every time I sit somewhere where I’m sure he wouldn’t bother to come to, I’d still smell that- that...that fucking scent of his that I can’t, for the life of me, figure out what it is.” You had thankfully placed the whiskey bottle away from you and didn’t try to fight the tavern-keeper when he took it and put it back on the shelf, instantly returning to you to make sure you weren’t about to break anything.

“I even gave him my room. My room! Because ‘no one can see my face’ so he needs some privacy away from me but then there’s the whole ‘the child stays with me all the time’ and that womp rat can sleep in the little cot in my room with him while also giving him some privacy. Which leaves me, you guessed it, in the shitty lower deck where there is no door, not even a curtain, to give me some semblance of solitude.” You didn’t realize how harshly you were breathing until you stopped speaking and noticed the way the stranger continued to look at you.

“It has been a literal hell not being able to get myself off because he can walk in on me at any given moment. Picture that, not getting off for almost a year while being forced to remain in the same vicinity as him.” You didn’t care when you saw the man almost choke on his drink at your bold admission and looked around to make sure no one heard you. “Ughh, you’ve been such a good boy listening to me whining all night long and I think you deserve a treat.” You knew you had him as soon as he shivered at the way your fingers moved beneath his shirt and scratched his neck. “You look like the kind of guy that could fuck me within an inch of my life. Right?”

“Ah huh. Y-yeah.” He licked his lips before setting down the towel in his hands and inching closer towards you. And you silently swore at how absolutely pathetic he was because not a minute ago, he was trying to find a way out of this conversation and here he was thinking with his probably-disappointing dick.

“Good. And I promise to make it worth your while if you manage to make me forget his name.” You leaned across the counter and were about to kiss him when you saw something move across your peripheral vision, something that looked oddly familiar to your completely hazed mind.

“And what’s his name, baby? So I make sure you can’t rememb-” Before he could finish whatever he was about to say, you felt a large hand wrap around your upper arm and pull you back from the bartender and off of the stool. You almost tripped as you struggled to stand and huffed in anger before raising your voice to the distinguished individual who thought this was the time to fuck with you.

“Hey what are y-” You were about to take a swing at whoever it was currently bruising your arm when you followed the glint of the familiar metal and were met with your reflection staring right back at you. Swallowing the lump in your throat, you blinked in confusion a few times at the visor currently tilted in an almost judgemental manner at you before attempting to wipe your hair with your other hand.

The Mandalorian slowly changed his focus to the man behind the bar and threw a few credits at him, hands immediately lowering to the blaster in his side holster when he saw where the tavern-keeper’s eyes moved towards. The stranger could only hold up his hand in defeat before walking towards the other side of the bar to lick his invisible wounds. The Mandalorian’s helmet turned to the rest of the cantina, daring anyone to approach the two of you before you left. The last thing he wanted was for anyone to follow the two of you as you returned to the Revenant. He could feel his patience withering away with every passing moment you decided to share what’s on your mind with the rest of the universe but him.

“Let me go.” You whispered to him, eyes maintained to the ground and cringing when you felt his hold on your arm tighten at the request. Before you could ask him again, Mando was turning around and walking out of the busy cantina, pulling you along with him aggressively and not leaving any room for negotiation. You winced as he pulled you like a child through the streets, avoiding the concerned and intrigued looks you were receiving. He was much taller than you and you laughed when you realized it must have been a sight to see some random woman getting dragged along by an angry bounty hunter. Mando couldn’t help but turn towards you when he heard your giggles break the silence, his annoyance spiking because there was absolutely nothing humorous about this situation.

You noticed the way he was staring at you and decided to quiet down, swallowing the lump in your throat as the cold air hit your sweaty skin and made you shiver.

As you moved closer to the ship, you realized there was a chance he heard what you had to say about him and your ship. Hurt and anxiety rose up your throat and before you could attempt and control the all too familiar feeling, you were tripping over your feet and falling to the ground, instantly vomiting everything you’d managed to eat and drink in the last couple of hours.

The Mandalorian hoped his obviously misplaced outrage wasn’t what led you to such a violent reaction, and he kneeled down immediately to hold your hair away from your face. When he saw tears falling down your cheeks and how hard you were breathing beneath him, something snapped in his chest and he knew he was definitely the reason behind this severe response.

“Don’t- oh gah….kriffing look at me.” You spat in between words and turned away from him, holding onto your stomach and to the grass beneath you as you continued to empty your stomach in the middle of the forest. At least you weren’t in the city anymore.

“We’re close to the ship,” he didn’t know what else to say and chose to state the obvious instead, afraid of using a harsher tone with you. Actually, he did know what to say, he just didn’t trust himself to speak the words out loud yet.

“Wopty fucking doo for-” once again, you opened your mouth and dry heaved until you were sure there wasn’t a single drop of whiskey in your system, “you and your stupid kriffing-”

“Please Ad'ika, let me-” You visibly shook at the familiar endearment you’ve heard him whisper to the child so often when he thought you weren’t around. It hurt to know he was throwing it around as if he wasn’t twisting the knife inside your heart with every breath he took near you.

“Let m-me go, p-please.” Mando’s sudden intake of breath was as loud as the silence engulfing the two of you and you swallowed your pride before looking into his visor, well aware of how awful you must have looked without the reflection staring back at you. He, on the other hand, grasped in that moment just how deep your words in the cantina were and instead of listening to you and allowing you a moment alone, he took a deep breath before softly pushing back your hair and wrapping one arm around your waist. You didn’t have any time to question him as the other went beneath your thighs and before you knew it, you were holding onto his cowl for dear life as he quietly walked up the ramp of the Revenant with you in his arms.

Mando pushed in the code to shut the hatch before making his way through the quiet halls of the ship, reaching hi- your room and going straight to the bed he has occupied in the last few months. As he put you down, he took notice of your body language and knew instantly how self-conscious you must have felt laying on the bed he’s been using since he joined you. The same bed which you sort of commented about not an hour ago. He watched as you forced a smile as soon as you saw the familiar green little womp rat peeking its head right before descending from the safety of his crib and wobbling towards you.

You tried to leave the bed but Mando was ahead of you, gently pushing your shoulder until you realized there was no room for arguing with him. Leaning down, he took the kid and put him back in the crib before telling him he couldn’t cuddle with you tonight.

You kept your hands clasped together and refused to look at him, eyes taking in the room no longer familiar to you. He’d moved things around, even put things away that he didn’t need. Your gaze shifted towards him unintentionally as you saw him approach you with a cup of water and wet towel. Pushing the covers towards you, he sat near your thighs as he handed you the water and began to softly wipe at your cheeks and forehead.

You shut your eyes out of fear of giving more away just by staring at his visor and Mando thanked the stars you had because he wasn’t sure he could truly look at you if they were still open. It was a ridiculous thought because he was wearing a mask and you’d never know how much he loved committing all those little muscle twitches to memory. But it felt strangely intimate to return your gaze and he didn’t want to make you any more uncomfortable tonight.

You sighed heavily at his touch and felt pathetic at how starved you were for anything that had to do with him. The man was wearing gloves and wasn’t technically trailing his fingers over your skin but it still felt difficult to contain yourself.

When he was done, he stood up and moved to the refresher, giving you a few moments alone before he imposed on you again. You gulped down the water and placed the cup on the floor near you, looking out of the large window to your right and noticing the dark blue skies moving slowly above you. It took you a few minutes to recognize that what you were feeling was no longer hurt but confusion. He’s acted so differently tonight and you hated to think it was because he was pitying you. It didn’t matter anymore whether he’d heard what you said about him or not. He would have found out sooner or later, and if you were being honest, you felt like he probably had some inclination for a while before but chose to not bring any attention to the topic to save you from embarrassment and rejection.

“Get some rest.” You turned towards him again, not realizing he’d come back into the room and was standing right beside you. Mando tried his hardest not to give away any of his thoughts but you knew what he was thinking as soon as you saw his helmet tilt down just below your neck.

When you followed his line of sight, you felt ill again but for a completely different reason. Of course this would get worse. You weren’t planning on seeing him tonight and you told yourself you’d have plenty of time to change out of his shirt but it seemed that the universe was not making this any easier on you. Mando couldn’t stop staring at the shirt wrapped so loosely around your smooth skin and how large it looked on you. If he was a decent man, he would have turned away when he saw you shifting uncomfortably under his gaze but he couldn’t help taking in the way your body seemed to react to his presence and before he could think about it, he was stepping closer to the bed and reaching out to touch the material of his shirt falling down your shoulder.

“I- I’m sorry about your s-” The words died in your throat when you felt his gloved fingers trailing down your exposed clavicle and you were torn between asking him what he was doing and letting him carry on without interrupting his curiosity. Mando barely held himself back from pushing you down into the covers and taking what he now knew was his but he noticed the sudden goosebumps erupt on your skin and finally managed to meet your eyes through the visor. The way you were returning his gaze was perhaps too much for him and he flinched away from you, clearing his throat and willing himself to think of anything else but the way you were practically begging him to take you. You parted your lips to say something but couldn’t find your voice, afraid you’d push him more than he could take and drive him away all together.

“It’s fine. It’s...I don’t mi- forget about it. You need to rest.” He spoke softly before walking towards the cot nearby and pushing the crib out of the door.

“Wh-where will you sleep?” You sat up and knew he noticed how much you were holding onto every single interaction with him.

“Good night,” he didn’t bother to respond to the question, turning off the lights and shutting the door behind him before making his way to the cockpit. You sat in silence for a few moments before slithering under the covers, sighing in annoyance when you noticed just how much this entire room smelled like him. Pushing your face into the pillow, you took a deep breath and felt shaken to the core when you were hit with Mando’s distinctive scent: sweat, beskar, and that damn featherfern wash he somehow found every time you flew by Nevarro.

As you looked out the metal blinds, you tried to brace yourself for the conversation you were most definitely going to have with the Mandalorian the next day. You knew for a fact that whatever decision he’d take will ultimately hurt you because there were really only two options available, one of which involved him and the child leaving and the other would lead to them staying but making things awkward since there was not a single chance he would reciprocate your feelings.

And the worst part was, you weren’t sure which was more painful.

The Mandalorian sat quietly in the cockpit for a while, making sure you were asleep so as to not wake you up as he moved through the Revenant. Seeing that the kid was fast asleep, he found himself leaving the small space and navigating to the lower deck. He passed by your room and noticed the lights were off, sighing in relief at knowing that you were finally resting comfortably. Arriving at the lower deck, he stood at the entrance of the large room and felt his chest tighten once he took in the state of the space. Turning on the lights, he immediately noticed your makeshift cot in the far right corner, unable to stop himself from moving towards it to inspect it. He shook his head in anger but this time it was aimed at himself and not you or the random tavern keeper who couldn’t keep his eyes off of you.

How did he not know of this arrangement? And why did he not ask about your sleeping situation the day he joined your ship? Was he truly that unconcerned with anyone else but the kid or was it because he was reluctant to listen to Peli when she recommended you?

He’d only been in the lower deck for a few moments yet he felt his skin crawl with goosebumps. It was awfully cool down here and it took him another ten seconds to acknowledge that you’ve been living and sleeping here for this long without complaining once to him.

Everything you said about him earlier tonight crashed into him like a wave of guilt and he couldn’t stay in the room any longer, making his way back to the upper deck to try and figure out what he would say to you come tomorrow. As he slowly moved through the dark hallways of the Revenant, he heard a faint voice coming from the upper deck, muscles tensing instantly when he walked past your room and noticed you weren’t on the bed.

Not wanting to disturb you, he waited right outside the cockpit and listened to you humming to the child. He must have woken up and found his way back to you. As he crossed his arms and stood behind the door, he couldn’t help but notice how soft your voice was as you continued to sing a lullaby to the little womp rat.

How could he have not noticed…

“There you go, you little green goblin. If only I could sleep as quickly as you.” You whispered to him before tucking him into the crib while continuing to rub his abnormally large ears. “Your dad is really funny...thinking I’d be able to sleep in that room with his scent all over it.”

Maker, how were you so forthright with everyone but him? It hurt to know that he wasn’t someone you could whisper your little secrets to. Then again, it made sense since all of your secrets seemed to involve him.

“I pray he doesn’t tell me he has to leave now that he knows I...ughh, for both of our sakes little one.” Mando noticed the way you seemed incapable of finishing your sentences whenever you spoke about him and a deep part of him wished you would, if only to hear the adoration in your words. Rarely anyone spoke of him so softly and he had a feeling he’d only ever accept such words from you. It was quiet for a few minutes before he heard you whisper to the kid again.

“It just hurts to know that he’ll never see me as...as a-” He wasn’t sure if it was the heartbreaking tone of your voice or if it was the way you were reluctant to say your heart’s desire out loud but Mando couldn’t stand another second of you thinking you weren’t important to him.

“As a what?” His voice came out harsher through the vocoder and he winced at himself when he vaguely heard you jumping from the chair. A soft hiss came from the cockpit and he took a deep breath when he realized you’d just shut the crib and moved to leave the room. As you stepped out, Mando forced his eyes to remain on your face, refusing to look at your exposed legs or the way his shirt seemed to end right beneath your upper thighs.

Softly shutting the door, you walked to the opposite side of the room and knew the Mandalorian must have noticed your need to put as much space between the two of you as possible.

“We need to stop running into each other like this,” you laughed awkwardly and anxiously ringed your fingers, glancing at his visor before turning away and looking everywhere else but him. Okay, so humor wasn’t going to get you out of this situation.

“How’s your head?” You could feel how on edge he was and decided to answer with short and straightforward responses just to avoid any more awkwardness.

“M-much clearer.” You stood in silence until you heard the Mandalorian pushing off of the opposite wall and heading towards you. You didn’t have anywhere to go, eyes snapping to the door right behind him and knowing there was no way you could try to walk around him.

He stopped a couple of feet away from you and you ceased to breathe when you noticed how awfully close he was to you.

“Answer my question.” His voice was dangerously low and you found it difficult to try and think of anything to say when he was giving you no room to breathe.

“I- I did?” Your voice was far from confident and you watched as he gently took off both of his gloves before shoving them into his pockets. Even though he willingly removed them in front of you, you didn’t allow yourself to look at his skin, afraid you’d somehow offend him and his Creed. But then you saw his hand move towards your face, and gasped when you felt his fingers tilting your chin so you were looking into his visor. There was not an inclination of an emotion available to you but you forced yourself to keep your eyes open nonetheless.

“How do you want me to see you Mesh'la?” Mando whispered down to you and you swore his voice was hoarse as he spoke to you but you didn’t allow this moment to get to your head. It would hurt more than anything if…

“It d-doesn’t matter.” You blinked away the tears, wanting to wipe your face before anymore were shed but not finding it in yourself to move away from him. But then you felt his thumb softly rubbing at your wet skin, making you almost lose your composure as soon as he stepped closer in your space until your back hit the wall.

“I’m sorry Cyar'ika,” his chest was inches from your face, cornering you beneath his other arm before leaning down and resting his forehead against yours. You couldn’t breath, not when he was suddenly filling all of your senses as if it was the most natural thing to do. He felt your tears roll around his thumb and couldn’t bear the thought of you crying because of him.

“I’m sorry for making you think you don’t matter...you do, not just to the kid but- but to me as well.” Your knees gave out on you as soon as you heard Mando’s confession, barely managing to grab onto his forearms right before buckling against him. The Mandalorian wasn’t sure if that was the kind of reaction he was looking for but he immediately wrapped his arms around your back and legs before pulling you against his chest. You nuzzled into his chest and kept a tight hold on him as he walked through the dimly lit hallways back to your room. He could feel goosebumps take over the skin of your thighs where he was touching you and tried to distract himself from pushing you down into the middle of the Revenant and taking you right then and there. You deserved more than that.

As he reached the room and laid you on the bed, he felt your fingers clasp onto him harder and when his eyes trailed over your face, he knew you were silently begging him not to leave.

“I’m not going anywhere Ad'ika.” His reassuring tone tugged at your heart and you swallowed the lump in your throat as you watched him walk to the door and shut it behind him before moving to the refresher. You heard him shuffle around and allowed your mind to calm down, knowing very well that Mando wasn’t unkind and wouldn’t lead you on just to leave you. But then he walked out without his beskar armor and you swore you died and joined the stars. His helmet looked odd without his normal clothing and you knew he could probably see you shamelessly ogling him from across the room.

He walked to you and stood to the side, and you realized he was probably nervous. You pushed yourself against the wall and threw back the covers, hoping he’d understand what you wanted of him.

“Can I-”

“Please.” You cut him off before he could finish his question and he took a deep breath before laying on the bed and moving as close to you as possible. Before he could throw the covers over the two of you, you were already laying your head on his chest and wrapping an arm around him, fingers fisting into the soft material of his shirt unintentionally as you felt him relax beneath you.

You weren’t sure how long it’s been but you felt his heart rate finally come back to normal. Hoping you weren’t being too forward with him, you took his hand into yours and brought it to your lips, softly kissing his knuckles before turning his palm over to lay a kiss on his wrist. Mando was losing every ounce of control left in his body and his arm tightened around your back as soon as he felt the tip of your tongue against his hand.

“Pfassk,” you flinched at the rough expletive and raised your head to look at him, finding his visor already tilted down towards you. “I- I’m sorry I’ll stop if-”

“No..n-no, don’t stop. It just- you took me by surprise.” His chest was rising and falling more rapidly and if you didn’t know any better, you’d think he was as affected by this new level of ‘intimacy’ as you were, if not more.

You felt bold at his request, kicking the covers away before sitting up and moving to straddle his thighs. Mando was breathing harshly and mirrored your actions, sitting up against the cool metal of the wall before laying his hands on top of your exposed thighs. He let himself take in the way your skin flushed under his touch and smiled to himself when he continued to inch his smooth hands over your upper thighs until his shirt rid up your legs and revealed the pastel color of your undergarment.

“Cyar'ika…” He sighed when he finally forced himself to meet your eyes and found them dilated until there was barely any color left in them. You wanted to ask him what that word meant but chose to file it for later. Placing your hands on top of his, you smiled down at him before pulling them towards your lips and kissing his palms. Almost instantly, you felt him twitch against you, unable to control himself from bucking his hips against your heated core. You let go of his hands and laid your own on his chest, throwing your head back when you felt his tight grip on your thighs. You could tell he wanted to apologize but gave him no chance to do so, sliding against him until you were sure he was painfully hard beneath you.

“Maker...I- I could almost taste you on my tongue Mando. When you- you left me in here all by myself. I couldn’t sleep, n-not when I could smell you on these covers, not when I could feel you on my skin. I..gods, wanted to kiss you then, and- and I wanted to taste your- you...Please, c-can I? P-please-” You dug your nails into his chest and heard him throw his head back against the wall with every confession you moaned to him. He was never this unhinged and you wished to see him come absolutely undone at your touch.

“A-are you sure?” It pained him to ask but he needed to be sure that you wouldn’t regret this. Regret him.

“Mando, have you not listened to anything I’ve said tonight?” As much as you hated to remind him of the earlier and rather embarrassing events, you wanted him to know just how much he meant to you. You knew he was reluctant to let this relationship move forward and you couldn’t really blame him. This was all new to him. But you also didn’t want to stall, not when the two of you have become so aware of the other’s feelings.

You continued to rub yourself on him, shaking with anticipation when you heard him moan through the vocoder as you pressed yourself more confidently down on him.

“Mesh'la I-” Without warning, you took one of his hands and pushed it to your lips, slowly taking two of his fingers into your mouth and swirling your tongue around them until his moans grew louder. And when he pushed his fingers deeper into your mouth, you gripped his wrist tightly and groaned, making sure he could feel how much you wanted him.

“Y-you’re killing me sweet girl.” He wanted to loosen his hold on you, to take things slow, to not let himself get carried away with you, but he didn’t find it in himself to be gentle because he could feel how wet and needy you were above him and there was no way he was going to waste another second not being close to you.

“Please Mando, I want you, n-need to have you. I can make you feel so good. Please, can I?” You reached down and cupped him through his pants, finding him as hard as the beskar of his armor. He thrust up into your hand and swore violently before taking his hand away from your mouth and fisting it into your hair. You smiled when you felt him push you off of him, whispering something in Mando’a when he saw you pulling his pants down his thighs and throwing them behind you.

You bit your lower lip before moving off of the bed and pushing his legs along with you as well. Mando sat up and forced his hands to remain by his side, afraid his enthusiasm would make him get too rough with you and scare you away. When you laid your hands on his knees and pushed them wide open so you could get comfortable between his legs, Mando’s hands tightened around the covers and he hissed when he saw the way you were eyeing his cock. You were staring at him like he was a piece of meat and he wasn’t sure if he loved it or was embarrassed by it.

“Maker,” you whispered before dragging your nails up and down his thighs, watching as his cock twitched against his stomach every time you got a little aggressive with your touches. Looking up into his visor, you slowly leaned down and took the tip of his cock in your mouth, humming around him as you tasted precum leaking into your taste buds. That seemed to do it for him because one of his hands shot to the back of your head and fisted into your hair while the other moved down until it landed on your hand. He intertwined his fingers with yours and watched as you pulled back and licked the underside of his dick before spitting into your hand and wrapping it around him.

“M-mando, the taste of you,” you took as much of him in your mouth as possible while maintaining eye contact with his helmet, squeezing the base of his cock before reaching down and cupping his balls. Mando swore, involuntarily thrusting into your mouth and watching in awe as he saw a dangerous glint in your eyes right before you clasped his hand harder and somehow managed to take him in deeper. It was such a sight, holding affectionately onto your hand as you brought him to pleasure. Letting go of him with a pop, you laid wet kisses down the length of his cock, licking the protruding veins and smiling when you felt his hold tighten on your hair. “Is absolutely addicting.”

You could tell the exact second he lost all semblance of control because one minute you were kneeling at his feet, and the next thing you knew, Mando was pulling you up by your hair and throwing you beneath him on the bed. You wiped your lips with the back of your hand, watching his muscles flex as he removed his shirt expertly over his helmet. The soft starlight coming through the metal blinds of the window shone onto his skin and you trailed your gaze down his chest, finding the golden brown tone of his scarred body absolutely breathtaking.

“Mando, you’re beautiful.” You saw his hands begin to shake at your compliment, and you knew you’d take every chance you get from now on to tell him how much you adored him. You could hear him breathing through the mask and licked your lips when he looked down and saw the way you were playing with the hem of his shirt. Slowly, you began to pull on the soft material, about to take it off when he held onto your wrists. Your smile faltered for a second and hoped you didn’t somehow misunderstand his intentions.

The last thing Mando wished to see was your body giving away to shyness before him. Pushing your thighs open, he didn’t give you a chance to say anything else as he slid his fingers below the thin undergarment, violently ripping it off of you and discarding it onto the floor. You gasped when you felt him hard and heavy against your slit, taking both of his hands and pulling him towards you until he was only a hairbreadth away. He watched closely as you placed one hand around your throat while the other descended to your breast. You could tell Mando was reluctant to move so much an inch and when you pushed yourself against him, eyes daring him to do as he wishes, he found himself completely overtaken with the thought of you belonging to him and him only. You smiled when you felt the grip on your throat tighten, shutting your eyes and arching your back against him as the other cupped and pinched at your nipples through his shirt.

“If you want me to fuck you tonight, Mesh'la, then you’re going to keep my shirt on.” He could feel you shaking in his arms and smiled to himself at the knowledge of how much he affected you.

“Mando, please…” You would have continued begging him if he asked you to, but then he was moving away from you and leaning towards the window. Keeping your hands clasped to your chest, you watched as he shut the blinds until there wasn’t a single light shining into the room. You could barely see your own hands in the dark and wondered why he was shuffling above you. A soft hissing sound had you tensing in an instant and you ceased to breathe when you heard the faint sound of beskar hitting the ground.

“M-mando?” The question was more reluctant than inquisitive and you didn’t have time to react as you felt him lean against you until you were touching every inch of his skin. You blinked a few times in vain, knowing there was no way you would be able to see anything. But then you felt something soft brush against your cheek and as you turned your head towards him, Mando was molding his lips with yours, swallowing your gasps and sucking on your tongue as soon as you melted into him. He pulled away against his own will, but not before pushing your jaw with his nose until your neck was available to him.

“And my name is Din sweet girl, Din Djarin. It better be the only word you scream tonight as I fuck this pretty little cunt. Understood?” You weren’t sure if it was his deep voice that made you speechless or the fact that he not only took off his helmet for you but willingly told you his name as well. You committed it to memory, hoping this wouldn’t be the only time he took off his helmet around you. You’d always wondered what he sounded like without it, not comprehending that it could be so much sweeter than what you’ve dreamed of. And by the gods, his lips. How were they so soft and gentle? Maker, he had a stubble too, not a rough one but just long enough to tickle your neck as he kissed and nipped at your clavicle.

“Answer me Ad'ika.” He bit your shoulder to grab your attention once more, chuckling above you when you nodded frantically against him.

“You’re so soft Cyar'ika, I- I want to kiss every inch of your skin.” As much as you loved making him lose his mind at your touch, you had to admit you enjoyed him much more when he was in control. You smiled when he kissed along your shoulder before pushing down his shirt far enough to expose your breasts. Din bit down on his lower lip to contain himself, but then you were arching your back and pushing yourself into him and he couldn’t hold back. He kissed down your sternum, waiting until you relaxed in his arms before assaulting your nipples. You screamed his name as you felt his teeth tug on your nipple, hands shooting to his hair when you felt him grope and pull on the other.

“Din, oh ma-maker- your mouth is...f-fuck.” You could tell he was smiling as he aggressively licked the hardened bud before sucking on it again. Din pushed his cock against your wet slit, growling when you pulled on his hair and cried his name like a sweet prayer.

“I could smell your cunt sweet girl, so fucking wet and hot and ready for me.” Din pulled back and cornered you between his arms, bucking his hips into you until you were a needy and moaning mess beneath him. “Woke up countless times in this bed...hard and aching at the mere thought of you...d-dreaming of having you in my arms, wanting to sink into you, f-fuck you on every inch of this ship.”

“Din, please...I need you.”

The way you clawed at his back broke him and before he knew what he was doing, he was flipping you on your stomach and raising your hips against him.

“I need to have you Mesh'la.” Din leaned down and swiped your hair to the side, whispering the filthiest things in your ears as he took hold of his cock and rubbed it against your heat.

“I’m yours Din, do what you want. Fuck me, ruin me...cum in me if you wish. Just p-please-”

You made it sound so simple, trusting him. It was an odd feeling to know how easily you were giving yourself to him. It shouldn’t have come as a surprise, not after what you said tonight. But something about the way you offered yourself to him, especially with that last request, had him seeing stars.

Leaning down until his chest was sliding against your back, the Mandalorian held you against him with one arm across your front while he slowly slipped into your wet cunt. You sighed in unison, and Din felt a sense of pride fill his chest when you dug your nails into his arm while your legs began to shake beneath him.

“You’re a dream Cyar'ika, the best f-fucking dream I could ever have. And you’re all mine.”

“Y-yes, yours. I’ve always been yours, oh gods Din please, move. M-move.” You were babbling at this point but couldn’t find it in yourself to care, turning your head to the side just to feel him breathe against your cheek. His stubble rubbed deliciously at your heated and sensitive skin, and you would tell him later that you hoped he’d mirror those actions but elsewhere.

“So tight darling, I- you’re everything. The things I- uhhh, the thing I want to do to you.” Din achingly pulled out before snapping into you again, biting down on your shoulder when you clenched violently around him.

“Din, oh Din-” You wished you could tell him how good he felt, how much he filled you, how often you craved having him inside you and how much you were losing it now that he was. But you couldn’t find a single word, not when he was fucking you like you were it for him.

The normally quiet man was groaning and hissing above you, pulling you along with him as he sat up and continued to fuck you relentlessly. You reached back and held his head against your neck, crying in pain and pleasure when he picked up the pace and his hold on your hip tightened. You were sure there would be bruise marks the next day but you couldn’t tell him to slow down or be a little less aggressive, not when you finally had him where you’ve wanted for so long.

“Fuck, fuck….sweet girl, did- did you mean it?” He was asking you something and you didn’t really pay attention to him, focusing on the way he deliciously dragged against your tight walls over and over again. Din knew it wasn’t fair to ask you anything right now but he had to know. Needed to.

He stopped his movement all together, sinking as deep into you as possible and tightening his grip on your throat.

“Pfassk...answer me darling.” Din whispered into your ears and reached down to where you were joined, softly slapping your clit until you twitched and begged him to repeat his words again.

“I said, did you fucking mean it when- kriffing hell, when you said I could...c-cum in you?” He was reluctant to ask but there was no point in denying either of you.

“Yes, gods yes. I told you Din, d-do what you want with me.” You forcibly loosened the fingers around your throat and brought them to your lips, biting the palm of his hand as he resumed thrusting into you.

“Mesh'la...you’re such a sweet girl, letting me b-breed you...taking my cock so well, letting me fill you up. You were made for me darling. This cunt, this sweetest and tightest kriffing pussy was made for my cock.” He pronounced each word with a harsh push of his hips and you smiled when you heard how low his voice suddenly became. The sounds of skin slapping on skin filled the room and you hoped the child wouldn’t wake up from how loud the two of you were being.

“You’re mine darling. Won’t let anyone else touch you...fucking look at you even. Maker I- I almost lost it tonight in the cantina.” There was a hint of self-consciousness in his words and you hoped he didn’t think you could ever replace him.

“D-din..” You wanted to tell him no one else would compare but he didn’t give you a chance.

“Talking about me like I- fuck, like I didn’t care about you, like I don’t picture you coming on my cock every waking moment of my day. And flirting with him in my shirt...my kriffing shirt. I almost lost it when he put his hands on you sweet girl.” You weren’t sure if he had somehow become harder inside you or if it was his words that made you attuned to the feeling of him pushing into your cunt but you turned your head and kissed his cheeks, hoping he’d understand what you were trying to tell him with your touches.

“You’re the only one f-for me.” Din let go of your neck and held onto your hips, no longer caring about how rough he was being with you. Your heavy sighs were the only warning he had right before your tight walls convulsed around his dick and he continued to fuck you through your orgasm, falling on top of you and bucking his hips slowly into your cunt until you begged him to slow down.

“Cyare, ah pfassk, that’s it. Keep squeezing me darling. I’m so close, so close. Ah fuck, you’re mine. Mine, not letting you go. N-never letting you go. Oh maker...ner runi...ner. Ner. Riduur. My sweet girl...riduur.” Din didn’t realize what he’d said until the words were left hanging in the air and he felt a rush of relief wash over him as he finally admitted how he felt about you.

“Din, I lo- ahh gods please.” He silenced your screams with his hand, losing his rhythm as he came in hot spurts of cum inside you. Din bit down onto your shoulder just as you bit on the palm of his hand, continuing to push his seed deep inside you until he felt you a mixture of your juices seeping out of you. Neither of you moved for a few moments, relishing the way you fit so perfectly with each other. You could feel him breathing heavily against your back and smiled with pride when you realized you were the only one that got to see him like this.

Din didn’t want to stop touching you, falling to the side and grabbing your flush to him only to hiss when you unintentionally clenched around his softening cock. You kissed his wrist as he pulled the covers over the two of you, not bothering to move a muscle mostly because you knew he didn’t wish for you to leave him.

He kissed along the bruised ridges of your shoulders, drawing circles on your navel and smiling when you giggled beneath him.

“I wasn’t too rough with you was I?” He asked embarrassingly, not knowing what he’d do if you said yes.

“You were perfect Din...you- you are perfect.” You turned your head far enough in hopes of catching his attention, letting out a deep breath when he leaned over and captured your lips in a chaste kiss. He was so soft and you didn’t know which side of him you enjoyed more but you were sure you wanted to get to know him, all of him. His likes and dislikes.

“Far from it Mesh'la. I...I went to the lower deck and saw where you’ve been sleeping.”

“Oh…”

“Why didn’t you tell me sooner?” Din rose on his elbow, seeking your hands in the dark and holding onto your fingers as he raised your hand to his mouth and kissed along your hand.

“I- I didn’t want to make you think you weren’t welcome. Peli told me about the Creed and well, there isn’t any sort of privacy down there really. And the kid would’ve been cold. I know how much he likes to cuddle next to you when he sleeps.”

“But you’ve been-”

“I’ve slept in worse conditions, believe me.” He didn’t say anything else in response but you knew he was very much thinking about it.

“Din, I wouldn’t change a single moment. Not one. Because each one led me here, to this bed, in your arms. I would relive every mission and every cold night and every awkward conversation again if I knew I’d end up here with you. You’re the closest thing I have to a..a-”

“Family.” He broke the silence before lying back down and pulling you as close to him as possible.

“Promise me you won’t get drunk by yourself in a cantina again.” You wished you didn’t laugh out loud at the random request because Din swore behind you before his grip loosened a bit.

“I’m sorry I...I didn’t mean to laugh. It’s just, here I am pouring my heart out and the only thing you could follow up with was that.” When he didn’t say anything in return, you grabbed his arm and pulled him back to you. “And yes, I promise not to get drunk in a cantina by myself ever again.”

“Good.”

“But I can’t really make any promises about not flirting with anyone because if it means I get to have you all hot and bothered then-”

“Sweet girl, you’re going to regret ever thinking of that…”

Translations:

Sleemo - This Huttese insult was pronounced slay-mo and translated as "slimeball," a rude insult.

Ad'ika - Little one

Mesh'la - Beautiful

Cyar'ika - Darling/Sweetheart

Pfassk - An adaptable expletive

Cyare - Beloved

Ner - Mine.

Runi - soul; only used poetically

Riduur - partner, spouse, husband/wife

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