#at first he was hard to get into bc he's fucking Odd and his humor can be jarring

[the-acid-pear]

[nereidprinc3ss]

slumber party

in which there's only one bed. fem bau!reader x spencer reid

fluff! warnings/tags: dark humor, (the word molest is used jokingly once but in my defense your honor its completely on brand for early seasons cm humor, if u cancel me u have to cancel the whole cast those are the rules, its just a joke cause reader always flirts w him aggressively, pls don't come for me i have a wife and children and three boyfriends to take care of,) mutual pining, bullying and death threats as flirting, they love each other so much and bicker like children, glasses spencer, (moans), emily and rossi are mentioned bc canon means fuck all to me, i think thats it but this is my most out of pocket duo so if i'm wrong lmk a/n: just a silly little thing that i cooked up, not a masterpiece but i think its cute!! I hope u enjoy!! lmk what you think!! looooveee youuuu

“Oh, there is no way.”

Your duffel bag hits the dingy carpet as Spencer is still closing the door behind you. 

“What? Is it—”

You give him a look over your shoulder, eyebrows raised as if to say, what are you going to do about this?

But he only manages to meet your eyes for a split second before they’re back to the singular queen bed, darting over the white sheets and pillows like he might find another mattress if he looks hard enough. 

Sharing a room with Spencer, you can handle. You've done it before. Whenever the team has to pair up at a hotel, you two are an obvious choice. And while you occasionally butt heads, mostly you adore each other and it's great.

But sharing a bed is a whole other situation.

One you were not prepared for. And evidently, neither is he.

Watching his big anxious eyes flit around the room nervously, you feel sort of bad for your reaction. You know you can be a bit… abrasive, sometimes. 

“It’s fine, I’ll just—I’ll see if I can share a bed with Emily or JJ in their room—”

Just then there’s a knock at the door. Spencer looks relieved to have something else to focus on, turning back around and quickly undoing the latch again before opening the door to reveal your favorite raven-haired SSA. Emily leans past the doorjamb, eyes immediately honing in on the awkward sleeping arrangement. 

“Oh my god! You guys too?”

“What?” You and Spencer ask at the same time. Emily raises her eyebrows at this and glances between you, but otherwise doesn’t comment. 

“Me and JJ only have the one bed. I thought it might just have been us.”

You frown. There goes your plan of sharing a room with them. 

“What about Morgan and Garcia?”

Spencer snorts.

“Something tells me Penelope wouldn’t be too torn up about it if that's the case.”

“Hotch and Rossi?”

The room goes quiet and a little chilly as the thought disturbs everyone equally. Emily frowns deeply.

“I don’t even… I can’t picture that.”

“Can we please not try to picture it?”

“Great. Okay, well. I just wanted to make sure everyone is suffering equally. Good luck, champs.”

“Thanks,” Spencer mutters dryly. Emily smiles, eyes darting between the two of you for just a moment too long, before pushing off the door frame and disappearing from sight. Once the door is closed again, a heavy silence ensues. “I’ll… I can take the floor—”

“It’s fine, Spencer. I’m not going to make you sleep on the floor. We’re both grown-ups. Besides, we like each other, right? It’ll be like a slumber party.”

“I’ve never had one,” he admits. His glasses slip further down his nose as he frowns. Your fingers itch to push them back up. 

“Then I’m happy to be your first,” you tease, facing him fully with your hand on your hip and barely resisting the urge to add, I’ll be gentle. “Do you want the shower first or can I?”

Spencer has a habit of looking you up and down like he doesn’t realize he’s doing it. Some might find it odd, but his utter lack of social graces is, lucky for him, incredibly endearing to you. 

“You can have it first,” he says, meeting your eyes again. “Just don’t do that thing where you get the entire bathroom soaking wet.”

“Aw. But I love doing that. It’s my favorite part,” you tease, scooping up your bag once more.

Twenty minutes later you’re emerging from the bathroom with damp hair, clad in loose shorts and a college hoodie. 

“Nice outfit,” Spencer says from the spinny-chair at the desk, examining your outfit choice with a scrutiny you wish you’d been prepared for. Really, you wish you’d known ahead of time you’d have a roommate and brought some alternate sleeping clothes. “I had no idea you felt so passionately about… Scooby Doo?”

“Shut up right now,” you grit, tossing your bag into the corner of the room and tugging your hoodie down over your cartoon-patterned shorts as far as you can. 

“What?” He’s laughing as he brushes past you on his way into the bathroom, bearing his own bag. “It’s a good look for you.”

Your face is burning as you choose the side of the bed furthest from the door. Springs creak underneath your weight as you sink down, sitting with your legs hanging off the side for a moment before swinging them up onto the mattress, leaning against the headboard and side-eyeing the empty space next to you. There’s really not very much of it. The bed feels even smaller than it looks. 

From the bathroom you hear the sound of the shower squeaking and starting up again—a cacophony of droplets against tile on the other side of the wall. You try not to be nervous as you imagine Spencer filling the space beside you in just a few minutes, hair wet and in pajamas. And yet you spend each second wondering if he’s almost done, wondering if the shower will finally sputter to a halt, and once it does, wondering how long it’ll be before he’s out again. It’s ridiculous how impatient you're getting—and by the time you finally watch the door knob twist you feel crazy. 

“I think that was your longest shower yet, Dr. Reid.”

The teasing affords you a moment to ogle him head to toe, taking in his choice of pajamas—tonight, familiar plaid pants and an MIT crewneck—as well as his hair which has already begun to dry. Briefly you wonder if he does that thing guys do, where they lean down and haphazardly dry their hair with a towel because they have no concern for its texture whatsoever. But you kind of doubt it, because his hair always looks so soft. 

“You were sitting here waiting for me?” He chuckles, and honestly you’d been expecting a shyer response. But you adapt quickly. 

“Maybe I was. Big spoon or little spoon?”

“Ha-ha.” He opens a drawer in the dresser and begins unpacking his clothes into it. It's a funny habit of his. You never unpack your duffel. “You took the better side of the bed.”

“Uh, yeah. I’m the woman. I get to do that.”

“Well you should know that if an intruder breaks in, I’m not fighting him off. You’d probably have a better chance than me.”

“And my chances will be even better if he’s distracted with you first.”

“So I’m just bait?” He scoffs, looking back at you. Strands of wet hair hang so prettily around his face, like the perfect frame around a work of art. You smile sweetly from your spot on the bed before playfully biting at the air in his direction. The message goes unspoken but reads loud and clear. Of course you are. You make such good bait. 

That gets a blush out of him and he has nothing else to say as he turns back to his drawer. Happily you lean back against the headboard, stretching your legs out and bouncing slightly in place. Beneath you the mattress springs groan and squeak in protest. 

“I hope you're not going to be this irritating all night.”

It's clearly lighthearted, but you promptly stop and frown at his back. 

“Call me irritating again and see where you end up sleeping tonight.”

“I just don’t see how you’re even more hyperactive than usual right now. Has anybody ever told you that you’re crepuscular?” Spencer asks, finally sliding the drawer shut and going to shut the overhead light off. Your eyes narrow. 

“Obviously nobody has told me that.”

“It means y—”

“I’m most energetic within the few hours around dusk and dawn. Contrary to your belief, Dr. Reid, other people are also capable of looking up words in a dictionary and remembering what they mean. Are you going to stand in the corner all night or are you gonna come to bed?”

“I am,” he scoffs, clearly embarrassed and shy and embarrassed of being shy. “I’m just… you look like you kick in your sleep. And hog the blankets.”

You shrug, folding your knees to your chest and hugging them quaintly. 

“I’ve never had any complaints. In fact, you should be so lucky to share a bed with me. All five star reviews, baby.” 

You toss a suggestive wink in at the end, which seems garish enough to break the tension so that Spencer can stop lingering in the corner like a sleep-paralysis demon and move to carefully take his place next to you. He almost mirrors your position, but his legs are too long to quite manage your level of compactness and so they simply fold underneath him. A few silent moments go by, in which you have the dumbest smile on your face and you keep glancing over to the side, waiting for him to be looking back at you. 

“This is already the least relaxed I have ever been in a bed.”

“Good thing we’re not going to sleep yet.”

Finally he looks at you, a casual mix of hesitance, concern, and moderate curiosity coloring his features. 

“We’re not?”

“Oh, my god, Spencer,” you snort. “I’m not gonna molest you. We have to do slumber party stuff, remember?”

He flushes again, glancing at the digital clock in his bedside table. 

“But it’s late. We should go to sleep.”

“At slumber parties you have to stay up until you literally can’t keep your eyes open anymore. Those are the rules. I don’t make them.”

Still, your insistence that you follow the international code of sleepover law goes unabided by Spencer. He simply leans over to flick off his lamp, bathing the room in darkness. 

“I appreciate the effort,” he says, and your eyes haven’t adjusted but you can hear the rustle of sheets and blankets as he gets under them, “but unfortunately we have to be awake and alert in five hours.”

“You’re no fun,” you huff, but climb under your own side of the cover and scoot down until you’re flat on your back, covered in blanket and hands folded on your sternum. 

Spencer doesn’t respond. 

It’s silent for maybe five minutes, during which your brain doesn’t slow down at all. Maybe you are crepuscular. Or slightly nocturnal. You have nothing but energy. 

In an attempt to get comfortable, you try adjusting your position.

The mattress squeaks. 

You do it again. 

Another squeak. 

A second goes by, and now you’re intentionally jostling about, squeaking the mattress as much as you can. 

“Would you stop that?” Spencer says, voice already gravelly with sleep. You manage, but you’re already devolving into a fit of giggles. “I’m going to smother you with this pillow,” he threatens, but you hear the disgruntled smile curling his words. 

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry. I’m just not in the mood to rest.”

Another moment passes. He sighs deeply. You smile into the dark. 

“What are you in the mood for?” He asks flatly, and you’ve won. 

“Tell me a secret,” you immediately demand in a hushed tone, flipping on your side to face his back. “Something you’ve never told anyone else.”

“I don’t—”

“Shh! You have to whisper it. Those are the slumber party rules.”

“I don’t have any secrets,” he whispers, clearly flustered, and to your delight, rolling to face the ceiling. “None that you’d want to hear.”

“Oh, now that’s just not true. You’re an enigma, Spencer Reid. You fascinate me.”

You’re only sort of kidding. 

“I… fascinate you?”

“Completely. You know, ever since you moved your desk across from mine I get distracted just staring at you and wondering what you’re thinking about. But you’re very… hard to read, sometimes. I think it’s because you’re a Scorpio.”

“The position of the stars at the time I was born has no bearing on my personality.”

“Fine,” you concede, still in a glorified stage whisper. “But that doesn’t mean you don’t display the archetypal Scorpio traits. You’re all brooding, mysterious. Kinda, I don't know... intense and sexy and unknowable…”

“Sexy?” He laughs, breaking the whisper rule. You grin and let it slide. You’d hoped he would catch that one. 

“Hey,” you snap, losing the smile immediately and lightly shoving against what you hope is his shoulder. “You’re supposed to be telling me a secret, damnit. I won’t let your wiles and charm distract me from getting what I want.”

“When have you ever let anything stop you from getting what you want?”

Truly, your cheeks are going to start aching with this constant back and forth between poker-faced and huge Cheshire smile. 

“Stop flirting and answer my question, Reid.”

With the amount of times you’ve made him sigh tonight he must be dizzy. You chew your lip apprehensively in the silence, picking a loose thread on your pillow. It’s so pitch black in the room, you can’t see him where he lies only a few meager inches from you. But you can feel his presence. You can feel the unexpected bass to his voice when he’s tired and speaking this lowly, which you’ve never heard before.

“All the secrets I’ve never told anyone are just… depressing.”

Your heart sinks a little at the way he swallows between words, like that in and of itself was hard to admit. Unthinkingly your hand slides into the small gap of white cotton between the two of you. 

“Not very good slumber party material, I think,” he laughs self-consciously. 

“You’d be surprised.” 

The sentiment comes quieter and more serious than you’ve been all night. If only you had the words to tell him that he can tell you anything. That you want to hold his secrets for him under lock and key. That you would never, ever do anything less than offer him kindness and support—even if it doesn’t always seem that way when you’re teasing him. 

“Do you have any secrets you’ve never told anyone else?” He murmurs eventually, so soft it could kill you. 

And you do. There are plenty of dark ones, probably not all dissimilar from those he’d elected not to share only a moment ago. 

But you don’t bring those up. 

Instead, you decide to admit to something silly. Still, it makes you nervous as you feel it coming loose in your chest. You’ve really never told anyone this, and it’s perhaps more vulnerable than you’d realized before the words were already leaving your mouth. 

“I, have…” You pause to laugh at yourself, and continue on. “I have a stuffed dragon that I take with me on every single case.”

“You do?” Spencer laughs, so loud and unexpected it almost hurts your ears, angling his head toward you. Blood rushes to your face. 

“Yes. He usually sleeps in bed with me. He’s an excellent listener and has been the origin of several of my most genius breakthroughs. You remember Gibson Cooper?”

“Family annihilator from Houston?” 

“Correct. He’s in prison because Oscar helped me make the Cook Creek Campground connection between the O’Hara and Diangelo families.”

“You have a stuffed profiler dragon named Oscar? Is he here?”

“He’s—I mean, I wasn’t expecting to share a room with someone.”

“So he’s in your bag.”

“Yes,” you seethe, “and I will not be introducing you to him. He doesn’t do well with men.”

“You are genuinely psychotic.”

You huff.

“Fine. I’m sorry I told you anything.”

You’re about to roll over onto your other side—but Spencer surprises you by catching the hand that had been outstretched in his direction. He carefully intertwines your fingers and squeezes gently. 

“You’re right. That was mean. Thank you for telling me about Oscar.” His tone is surprisingly teasing, and you’re so uncharacteristically flustered by this rare show of physicality and affection that you can’t muster an adequate comeback. Spencer doesn’t seem to mind filling your silence, though, sounding a little more solemn now. “I’m sorry I don’t have any secrets for you.”

The way his voice gets all thin and scratchy sometimes—it’s like the earnest sincerity just pours out of him. He can’t control it. He can’t be anyone other than who he is. Maybe that’s a part of why you love him so much. You wonder if he knows how much you love him. It’s not exactly a secret—anyone on the team would be able to tell as much. You’ve been relentlessly teased for the way you are with him. For your batting lashes and your lingering touches and your unabashed flirting. But beneath it all is true affection, and nobody doubts that. 

“It’s okay,” you decide with a squeeze of your own, after a moment of deliberation. “You’ll think of something. ’Cause, y’know—you’re stuck with me for at least a few more days.”

“Oh, god,” he laughs, and releases your hand, rolling over to face away from you. But you don’t mind. You’ll get lots more time to invade his personal space over the coming week or so. “Goodnight.”

“Sweet dreams,” you sing-song, turning away to face the wall with what is perhaps your biggest, stupidest smile yet.

[n3ptoonz]

Hello! I saw your most recent headcanon list thing with the Earthrealm guys being caught Slonking it Silly Style™ and uh. I was just wondering if you'd be willing to do something similar with the Outworld guys as well? Obviously you don't have to if you don't want to, but I think it would be neat! Thank you so much in advance! I love your work :)

deep, dramatic sigh. (kidding anon tysm i gush over comments like this ily smoochhhh) also the terminology made me laugh out loud ty for that

Shang Tsung

kinda sorta didn't gaf. who's to say he didn't want you to hear him. the world may never know

you were to report to him about some findings for his experiments and there he was, leaning over the table and straight up cranking it over a bucket (he's odd like that) honestly when you acknowledge your own presence he's like... can i help you?? you see i'm busy???

but at the same time he's like hold up i have a fine specimen here to help me out here...he's leaving here with SOMETHING (studio laughter)

Rain

i don't think he'd care either if you walked in on him. in fact, he might welcome it. he's used to having his own space, but he doesn't mind sharing it with people he's ok with being around. yes that includes you (is it only you? not even he knows yet)

day 8163 of using Rain's arrogance to push my narrative that he's not only in love with himself but how he looks in the mirror. you definitely walked in on him wanking it in the mirror and he'd freeze but recover so quick

ain't no way you're leaving here after you just caught him though. how else will his problems get solved? you went and made him hard all over again!

Reptile

syzoth has two, let's get that out the way. AND he uses both hands for them LMAOO

president of syzoth is a lil subby bitch society. so when you catch him tugging on both and reduced to a pathetic mess from his own hands??? he's frozen and quite literally has no clue what to do. he's sweaty, there's tears in his eyes, and his fangs are much more pronounced than usual

once you give him the green light that you're into whatever tf he was just doing watch him crawl over to you on all fours and hug your legs, practically begging you to touch him

Havik

expect this smug fuck to claim he wanted this to happen. dude was hunched over and going at it behind his own desk, grunting like a cave man who discovered self pleasure for the first time

1000% expect him to demand you help him, but instead it's after he froze for like 5 seconds and then tried to play it off

he would also be internally shocked when agree to finish the job, but on the outside it's like "that's what i thought...now get over here" whole time he's jumping up and down and twirling in his brain

Reiko

it's already rare that he has time to himself and definitely RARELY has time to be with you for an extended period of time, so you catching him when you wanted to surprise him with your presence it triggered his fight or fight LMAO

legit laughed at the thought of him jumping up from his chair hands ready to be thrown...but his dick is swinging PLSSSSSS

he's like well shit now he deserves your help after you almost got two pieced by your own boyfriend...but who's complaining?!

General Shao

this man weirdly reminds me of bowser sometimes. with that being said i think he'd do a BUAHA as a shocked sound when you catch him thwoping the schlong

as much as i can't fucking stand him he does look a lil better in this game i will admit. i'm not gonna sit up here and lie, he def has a HUGE wanker innit. so you didn't miss shit when you walked into his chambers

he would also demand your help. but if you have a lil push back just for fun, he'd eventually say please and be all soft and shit. why? cause it's you god damn it!

Baraka

let's be fr. truly i do not think mk1 baraka would masterbate simply bc he's like depressed all the time😭but for the sake of shits and gigs, ill humor y'all

let's say he hasn't seen you in a while and misses you dearly. he knew you were on a quest for a while, and he was very pent up... so what better way to release stress other than sparring! oh. not enough? time for another type spar 😈

if this were old baraka i'd say he has two 👁️ but since this version of tarkat is a disease let's say it made the skin around his wee like ribbed or something ya SO when you caught him he was in a straight up panic and apologizing profusely but once you calm him down and tell him you're glad he missed you so much, he's like oh shit...well help me out then...only if you want to!

a/n: i did it y'all FUCK. my bad for taking so long to release this i'm a perfectionist to a fault💀

[romanarose]

Honest Mistake (Cowritten with @missdictatorme)

Santiago "Pope" Garcia X Fem!Reader

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Triple Frontier Master List

Birthday fic for me and Dolli! Her's was the 18th, mine is the 20th (TOMORROW AT LEAST IN THE US!!!) so we whipped this bad boy up together! It was a lot of fun, we worked well together and have similar humors. I think some parts you'll be able to tell who wrote what, but others it could honestly be either. I hope you enjoy, bc I think this is pretty stellar!

Fluff

5k words

Summary: Santi goes into a panic one morning when he realizes it's your birthday, the first since you and him got together at Will's engagement party... and he forgot. In a hurry, he calls on his team to pull off a special day in order to make it seem as if he this all planned out ahead of time.

Warnings: some smut (fingering, oral), uuuhhh that's it? Content warning implied/referenced Nicolas Cage.

***************

“God baby, you just woke up this soaked?”

“It’s doesn’t help you’ve been grinding your morning wood into my ass the last hour.”

Santi had his finger down your Star Wars pj pants as the two of you laid in bed on this sleepy sunday morning, Santiago spooning you. Santi loved how you looked like this. Don’t get him wrong, he loved how you looked in business casual for work, he loved how you looked when he took you out on a fancy date and you got all dressed up, but something about this drove him crazy. Maybe it’s because only he got to see you like this, or maybe it’s because he got to see this so often instead of the one night stands he was used to. There was something so fucking intimate about it.

And it just turned him on like crazy.

“Not my fault you look this goddamn good”

“I literally have drool dried to my cheeks right n- oh” There it was. Santi curled his fingers and hit that perfect spot inside your gushing core.

“Only way I can get you to shut the fuck up, huh? Make you moan like a little whore?”

“Hmmmm I think you should be just a little bit nicer to me considering it’s my birthday.”

It took all his will power for Santi to not stop finger fucking you right then and there, his face hidden behind you hiding the horror at himself. BIRTHDAY?!?! It can’t be your birthday. That was tomorrow, wasn’t it? No, no it was a Sunday… next Sunday? No, next Sunday was Will’s wedding- oh fuck it’s your birthday.

“Sure is, hermosa” Santi mumbled into your neck. “And I have a great day planned for you, starting with…” Flinging the blankets off the bed, Santi scrambled his way down your body, sliding off the pants and diving in, large nose and all, into your cunt. Santi put every goddamn ounce of energy he had into making you scream, licking and sucking away, only breaking away to nibble on your thighs for a breath while he finger fucked you, never once letting up on the sensations he was giving. 

“Fuck! Fucking hell Santiago, what’s- uuugghh, fuck, what’s gotten into you today?”

“Just trying to give my girl the best birthday ever!” He said, perhaps too enthusiastically. Only Ben get’s that fucking excited. Still you didn’t seem to find it odd because you were moaning his name as you came on his face, Santi lapping up every drop until he drew a second, smaller orgasm out of you. “Just lay here, princesa.” Still in a panic (and fucking hard, on top of it all) Santi went and drew you a bath. The perfect excuse to leave you alone with a towel, face mask, candle, and music going so you didn’t have to hear him hyperventilating.

How could he do this? How could he forget your birthday, his perfect fucking girlfriend who remembers every date from his birthday, to Frankie’s daughter Yasmine’s recitals to the anniversary of Tom’s death. And he couldn’t remember this? It’s a week on the dot before Will and Lana’s wedding, how could he forget! Between the wedding, the bachelor party, groomsmen duties and not to mention last month he signed Yaz up for a soccer camp which meant committing to picking her up from daycare for a few hours every day for the last week and of course he had to take her out for McDonalds after like the good uncle he was… you had just gotten lost in the flood.

This would not stand. He’d give you the best birthday he could pull together last minute or so help him god! He just needs a few reinforcements.

Benny’s Boys 😎

Pope: I fucked up.

Ironhead: You forgot her birthday, didn’t you. 

🐟: How the fuck do you remember, Will

No Call Sign: Will drinks respect women juice for breakfast 

Ironhead: It’s a week before my wedding. How did you forget?

Pope: I don’t know! But I need your help to fix this!

No Call Sign: Have you tried eating her out? That usually fixes things when May is mad

Ironhead: Jesus Christ Benjamin. Have some class.

Ironhead: Have you, though?

Pope: GUYS

Pope: Also, yes.

🐟: What do you need, Pope.

After a four way call on the balcony and planning that rivaled what it took to almost pull off Colombia (Why does Will have a white board and a corkboard with pictures of them all, you, Yazmine, Lana and red strig just ready to go?), a preliminary plan was made. Santi would start by taking you to brunch where Will would just have enough time to bring over a bouquet of flowers and put their names in for a table without being seen. Meanwhile, Frankie and Yaz were going to be working on a cake and Benny called up everyone you both knew (why does he have everyone’s numbers?). Lana was their man on the ground, updating the boards in an organized fashion she knew Will loved and keeping everyone on track. One task each would not be enough to get this done, they’d have to hussle the whole day to pull off what the 4 men had planned in an effort to make it seem like Santi scheduled this out ahead of time.

When Santi finished the calls and the grand plan was made, he walked back to the bedroom, just in time to see the bathroom door open. He quickly dove onto the bed, landing on top of the covers and he propped himself up on one elbow, acting relaxed.

"Enjoyed your bath, mi vida?"

You lifted an amused eyebrow, seeing that he bounced a little on the mattress and looked a bit out of breath, but you nodded.

"Yes, baby, it was perfect, thank you." - you blew him a kiss and walked to your closet to dress up.

He had a big house, much bigger and much nicer than your flat, but last night was spent at yours. When you two first dated, Santi set the rules by saying that he wants to keep things slow and casual (like with all of the women he had in the past, he loved fucking them, he respected them, but he wasn't the type to spend most of his free time with them). 

You agreed, not wanting to complicate things. The sex was great and he was fun to hang out with, and because of that you didn't want to rush things in case you get bored with each other too soon.

This plan flew right out the window when both of you spent your nights in separate beds, thinking about the other, missing the other.

The next time you had sex, Santi pulled you closer when you wanted to get up, get dressed and leave, asking you to stay the night, kissing your neck. You melted in his arms and cuddled close to him, and after having the best sleep of your life next to each other, it was almost impossible for both of you to let go of the other from then on.

Santi was surprised you and him were still together. Not because you two together weren't perfect. He just… never met someone who made him feel this… happy. Now he felt even worse for forgetting your birthday.

He watched you dress up with a soft smile, loving the way your body looked. When you were done he got up too, lifted your face up with one of his fingers and kissed your lips sweetly.

"How about I'll take you to that restaurant you eye fuck everytime we pass it? For brunch?"

Your eyes widened. That restaurant was… expensive.

You opened your mouth to protest and Santi smiled wider, putting his forefinger against your lips.

"Not that you get any say in the matter, I'm gonna spoil my perfect little princess on her birthday and you can't do anything to stop me."

You mock pouted and bit his finger making him laugh, then you hugged his neck and kissed his lips.

"Okay, Mr. Kidnapper, I sure as hell don't wanna go to that restaurant I've been dying to try since I first saw it. And just for your information, I'm gonna be all grumpy and shit the whole time while we're there!" - you said as you turned to walk out the door and Santi's heart fluttered at seeing the excited bounce in your steps as he followed you.

You kissed his cheek when he opened the car door for you, making him grin widely; you were so sweet, so good to him. Just when you were driving near Santi’s house to get to the resteraunt, you spotted a car similar to Benny's as it turned in the street.

"Isn't that Be…?"

"So are you excited to try this restaurant?" - Santi asked all too eagerly.

"I think that was Be…"

"You must be so curious what I brought for you as a present, carino. I can't wait to give it to you."

You frowned a little then started talking about the reviews you read on the restaurant and started listing him the stuff you'd be happy to get as a present.

When you were looking out the window while you were rambling on and on, Santi quickly reached for his phone and started a voice recording. He sent it to William so he'll know what to buy.

As Santi took you into the restaurant, he got nervous since it was packed. How was he supposed to make it look like he had made a reservation? “Sit here, amor.” Santi directed you to an open chair and went to talk to a host. As he walked away, he heard you call his name, and when he turned around, he saw you in your pretty white dress making a heart with your hands. Santi made his best attempt at a heart back (it looked terrible.) and went on. You were so perfect, so pretty… how was he supposed to give you the day you deserved?

“Hi, uuhhhhhh call ahead for Santiago Garcia? Or maybe it’s under William-”

“Yes! Mr. Garcia! Your friend put your name in. Luckily we just had a bunch of tables get up, so as soon as they get bussed off, we’ll seat you. Maybe 10-15 minutes?”

Santi breathed a sigh of relief. “Thank you, that’s perfect.” He turned to go back to you when he realized a weak link in this plan. The hostess. This was not a military operation and he couldn’t ‘take care of it’ the way they used to… lucky for the hostess. “Hey uh… can you maybe not mention my friend to my girlfriend? Or that this was a call ahead instead of a reservation?”

She smiled knowingly. “Of course, Mr. Garcia.”

When he got back to you, he told you the wait time. “Sorry baby, they said they had some tables stay longer than expected.”

“Oh that’s okay!” You assured. You used to work in a restaurant and know how it goes. When the hostess came to seat you, she made sure to tell Santi his “reservation” was ready.

Brunch was… expensive. But it didn’t matter, you were worth it, and you smiled so brightly at every bite and every sip, he wanted to take you here more just to see you so happy. Just when he thought Will couldn’t swing the flowers, the hostess brought up a bouquet and Santi watched in delight as you beam at him. 

Next on the agenda was a picnic. Driving home, Santi prayed for the first time in half a decade that the Millers had gotten their next part done. Ben came over to start decorating and prepping the picnic basket. Will had to bring the physical basket and blanket… and glasses that aren't plastic. 

“BEEEEEEEENNNNNNNNN” 

“Relax!” The younger man shouted back as Santi entered the apartment. “We’re way ahead of schedule” Ben had stopped at the store to get a cheese and meat platter and was adding the finishing touches. Will had already left for his next part; buying a gift in which Santi would venmo the cost back. He didn’t care how much, just make it good. 

“Tio!!!” A little brunette ran up and hugged her uncle, covered in flour.

“Mija, what are you doing here?” He asked as he greeted his goddaughter.

Frankie round the corner from the kitchen. “Yasmine, you just got him dirty!” He scolded. Santi assured him it was fine and wiped off the flour, and Frankie explained. “We figured we’d make the cake here instead of risking transportation.”

With hugs and thank you’s all around, Santi grabbed the finished basket and dashed out the door.

When he got back in the car, you looked at him curiously. “Is that Frankie’s car down the street?”

Santi gives a noncommittal answer and mutters something about Frankie having ladies in every zip code, then drives away, quickly changing the subject to the new Barbie movie you wanted to see so badly as he took you out to the park for a picnic. 

Santi found a nice spot under a tree where the shadow was big enough to cover the big blanket from the heat of the sun. He made you sit down and you watched with a smile as he pulled everything out of the box. While he did that, you decided to pull off your sandals and removed Santi's shoes and socks too, making the man chuckle.

He opened the bottle of wine while you picked some cheese on your plate and you beamed up at him.

"Today is going great Santi. Thank you for this."

Santi smiled back at you and leaned over to kiss your cheek.

"You deserve the best, baby."

You shook your head, feeling your cheeks heat up.

"Still… No one put this much effort into making me feel special, like… ever."

Santi's smile faltered a little and you thought it was because of sympathy. But he felt shame envelope him. He shouldn't have forgotten your birthday. If he would've remembered he would've made you take a week off from work and would have taken you to somewhere nice. To Spain maybe, or Guatemala or Italy, maybe Greece. To somewhere beautiful where you always wanted to go. To make you feel like the most special girl in the world. Because you were the most special! At least for him. What would you think of him if you knew his friends were helping him, because he forgot your birthday? Did he really deserve you?

You pulled him out of his thoughts when you leaned your head on his shoulder as you were watching the lake where ducks and swans were swimming peacefully.

"You always make me feel special though. Everyday. Sometimes I feel like I don't thank you enough." - you said quietly.

Santi looked down and kissed your head several times, until you chuckled.

"Don't be silly, baby. You're the best thing that ever happened to me. There are times when I just look at you and wonder how you ended up being in my life."

You grinned.

"It was one of Benny's parties where you were drunk as hell, grabbed his guitar and started to serenade me, singing about how I am the most beautiful woman you've ever seen."

Santi started to laugh.

"Well, you are!"

"I just finished throwing up, and was trying to wipe my makeup off with little success."

"Still. I was watching you since you entered the house and was drinking cause I was trying to get enough courage to go over to you."

"This is such bullshit!" - you said, looking at him.

"Que?!"

"Benny told me you are the biggest womanizer he ever met, why did you need courage?"

"Because…" - he started as he booped your nose with his fingertip gently as he leaned closer. - "You are the most beautiful woman I've ever seen, and I didn't want to fuck it up." - he said and kissed your lips softly.

You snorted and kissed him back.

"So your grand plan was to get shitfaced and serenade me with silly lyrics you made up on the spot."

"Well, I didn't mean to drink that much, but Will just told us he got engaged and we had to celebrate." - he kissed your cheek again, then your neck. - "Besides… it worked." - he grinned.

"It did." - you laughed and kissed him again. 

Benny’s Boys 😎

🐟: Booked you a couples massage. Consider it your birthday gift. And christmas. Y Dia De San Jose.

Pope: I cannot say thank you enough, you guys

No Call Sign: Once would be great.

Pope: Hey! I said thank you!

Ironhead: Quit texting your boyfriend and woo your girlfriend. If you want her to be your wife you can’t let her think you’re going to ditch her for some blonde bimbo

No Call Sign: Wait. Am I the blonde bimbo?

🐟: Hey! He’s my blonde bimbo

No Call Sign: Thanks baby 😘

This was proceeded by Ben and Frankie ‘homie flirting’ as Ben called it, before Will reminded them Benny has a girlfriend and Frankie still needed to text Santi the details of the massage.

He took his time with you at the picnic, plopping little bits of meat and cheese and berries in your mouth, continuing to woo you with everything he had. He would make you feel like the most special girl on the planet if it was the last thing he did.

“You’re the most perfect boyfriend in the world“ You praised as you laid on this lap as he sat back against the tree. Santi dangled grapes over your mouth, feeding them to you as he fanned you (Will had a fan in his picnic kit? No wonder that man got engaged so damn fast). 

“Hopefully I’ll be the most perfect husband not long from now.”

The way you beamed up at him, eyes sparkling, made every worry he had disappear. “You mean that, Santi?” With bated breath, you await his answer. It wasn’t like you hadn’t been serious… but the line between meeting at Will and Lana’s engagement party where Benny brought you along to, where you had both said to stay ‘casual’ to where you were now, with you as Santi’s official plus one to Will’s wedding, spending nearly every night together… you hadn’t really talked about the future. You knew he was serious. He wouldn’t lead you along like this if he just wanted to casually date, and Benny would kick his ass if he thought Santi was being a dick to you (and threatened to do as much when you first told him about his two best friends dating), but you hadn’t really talked about it.

“I mean it, carino.” Assuringly, Santi caressed your cheek. “I know we’ve been moving a little slow, and I appreciate you meeting me at my pace. I know maybe it seems like I’m just messing around-”

“It doesn’t.”

“-but I promise you, I am very serious. And I’d like to take the next step.” He goes in for a kiss, pecking your lips and tasting the fruit on them.

“And what’s the next step, baby?”

“You’ll see when we get back to the apartment.” He did have one gift ready, something he had planned for weeks ahead of time to give today. It wasn’t that he forgot your birthday completely… he knew what day it was, he knew it was coming… it just got lost in the chaos. So yeah, he needed his 3 best friends, one’s fiance and his goddaughter to assist him. “But up next, a couples massage.”

Santiago did not mean to moan. He really didn’t. But between the stress of the wedding and this whole day, he was tense, and the massage therapist was good. Lucky for him, both his and your massage therapist were cool about it, and you burst into giggles, proceeding to tell his masseuse “I never get him to moan like that.”

He’d be humiliated if it was anyone else but you. You made everything so easy. You also mimicked his moan the whole car ride to his apartment as Santi prayed to god Benny had decorated and gathered enough people together to constitute a surprise party. It was definitely a perk that your friend was good friends with your girlfriend; they knew a lot of the same people. Okay, so maybe Santi thought Ben was competition at first! So maybe Santi kinda wanted to steal you from Ben! So maybe the reason Santi brought out the guitar is because Benny had previously played it and was singing ‘baby lock them doors and turn the light down loooowwww’ and Santi wouldn’t be upstaged! So sue him!

As he unlocked the door, he spoke REALLY LOUDLY in hopes they’d here and get into place. It worked. It definitely worked. Until Yaz shouted “DON’T SHUSH ME DADDY” and it was all over.

You looked at Santi suspiciously.

"You are either hiding your side-chick or… IT'S MY FAVOURITE LITTLE GIRL IN THE WORLD!"

In three seconds you two spotted Yazmine sprinting down the stairs and into your arms, giggling.

"No, Yaz, abort mission, I repeat ABORT MISSION!" - you heard Frankie yell after her, still in his hiding spot while Santi facepalmed himself.

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY!" - she shouted excited as you picked her up and kissed her cheek.

"Thank you, honey! So tell me…" 

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!" - suddenly dozens of people jumped out from behind different furnitures and you jumped back scared, but then laughed when you recognized the faces.

"Oh my god, guys, thank you!" - you laughed as you put Yasmine down and hugged everyone who came up to you.

Santi quickly searched for his friends to thank them all the effort they put into to make this day special for you. The decoration was done and it seemed like you loved it, if the way your eyes sparkled when you spotted another balloon or a birthday poster was any indication. 

You loved the restaurant, the picnic basket Will and Benny put together was fucking delicious, the massage was heavenly and now all of your friends were here to celebrate you.

"Guys, seriously, thank you." - Santi said as he hugged them.

"You better marry this woman one day, since we did all this for you two." - Will winked.

Santi looked over at you with a soft smile on his face. 

"Maybe I will."

Frankie, Will and Benny's eyes widened and they grinned, pulling Santi into another group hug. They've never seen their friend this happy and it was easy to tell that it was because of you.

You had a suspicion that it wasn't all Santi. You're not saying he wasn't capable to pull all of this off, but he looked a bit on edge the whole day and he was on the phone a lot more than he used to.

When Santi appeared in front of you with a big gift box, you grinned widely, taking it from him.

“Baby it’s huge!!!” You squeal as you both sit down to tear it open; right away you knew he had sent Will to get it. When you had listed off things you guessed he might have gotten you in the car this morning, you had named several items. A pandora’s charm bracelet, the giant blanket off redbubble with Nicolas Cage’s face all over it, that rose shaped sex toy you were curious about, a new hair dryer since yours had broken, and it was, in fact, the last one. This had Will written all over it. It wasn’t that Will couldn't be romantic; he was, from what Lana had told you and what you had seen, very romantic. However, out of the four, Will was more practical, and absolutely went for the hair dryer. Santi was more fancy jewelry, Frankie would go for the sex toy, and Benny…

The hair dryer was nice, though, very, very nice. It came with several attachments, and Will even managed to put in different hair masks and deep conditioners in there. It was perfect, and you would absolutely be using it on you and May to get ready for Will and Lana’s wedding. 

“THANK YOU BABY THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!!!!” Jumping up, you tackle him onto the carpet and pepper his scruffy face with kisses as you both giggled.

The night went swimmingly, a fun weekend but nothing crazy since most had work the next day and the real party would be next weekend, but you had such a great time, Santi serenading you with a cover of You and Me by Lifehouse. Benny somehow read your mind and got you that god awful Nicolas Cage blanket you wanted, and Santi he was never staying the night again.

When the crowd cleared out, leaving you and Santi alone, you took both of his hands in yours. “Thank you for today, Santiago. I had an amazing time”

Santi smiled at you, adoration and love spreading across his face. “I’m so glad, mi vida. It took a lot of effort” Now he could honestly say that wasn’t a lie.

Looking around, you compliment his work. “The decorations look great” You nod to the streamers that were so high up. “You use a step stool?”

Fake glaring, Santi furrowed his eyebrows. “Oh you’re gonna be a brat now, are you?”

Pulling your boyfriend closer, you look his dead in the eye but keep a light smile to make sure he knows you aren’t upset. “You forgot my birthday, didn’t you?”

His eyes go wide, and immediately he starts stammering. “No! No- why would you- baby I would never- your birthday of all days!”

You cock and eyebrow at him. “Santiago Garcia.”

He sighs. “Fine! So I forgot it was today, but I knew it was coming! I just got so… I don’t have an excuse, baby, I’m sorry.” He genuinely looked so sad, so disappointed in himself. 

“Oh Santi.” You lean in to kiss him, caressing his face tenderly. “It’s okay, you made me feel so, so special, so loved, not just by you but by your family, and that means a lot to me. Knowing that they care about me too. So thank you today was perfect.”

His face softens, smiling lightly. “Okay, so I had a lot of help. But!” He departs from you, walking into his bedroom and coming out with a small box. “This is something I made up weeks ago. I didn’t completely forget about your birthday.” He hands it to you.

“Santi, you shouldn’t have! You’ve already gotten me so much!” 

“Well, this one cost me like. Three dollars.”

When you open it, you see a small key from those kiosks at walmart that even had a Star Wars design on it. “Santi” You gasp. “Is this-”

“A key to my house, yeah.” Santi stuffed his hands into the pockets of his dark pants, shuffling nervously. “Well, we’ve been dating for a while, and you practically live here anyway” He teases. “I want you to just… make yourself at home. And when your lease is up… and if you feel ready… I was thinking…” The hopeful look on his high-strung face after everything he did to put today together at the last minute… you fell more in love with him every day.

“SANTIAREYOUASKINGMETOMOVEIN?!” You blurt out, practically jumping.

“If you want-”

Kisses. Nothing but kisses and I love you’s and you jumped and squealed in excitement. 

When you had settled and confirmed yes, you’d move in when your lease was up in a few short months, Santi took your mouth in his for a more passionate kiss, and a handful of ass in his hand for a squeeze. Sloppily, you two made out on your slow trek back to what would soon be your bedroom (Where the Nicolas Cage blanket was awaiting him, little did he know) he asked you.

“How did you know I forgot?”

“Weeeelllllll”  you draw it out as you go for his neck. “There were a few signs.”

He mumbles a few swears. “Was it Benny and Frankie’s car’s?”

“Well, yeah. But there was the fact, and baby I love you very much, but that level of decoration requires Benny’s enthusiasm.”

“Okay, yeah, well-”

“The gift screamed Will, and the massage had to be one of their ideas at the very least because you would never willingly strip for a woman you weren’t sleeping with.”

“Hey-”

“The cake had a chunk of missing frosting that was suspiciously Yasmine sized”

“She takes after her uncle Ben-”

“There was a fan in the picnic basket”

“Okay so?”

“And baby…” You stop right outside the bedroom door, both of you panting and eager for each other. “You never eat me out like that unless you are trying to make up for something.”

His stupidly sharp jaw drops. “Are you saying I’m not a pussy eating champion?”

“Hey!” You raise your arms in defense. “All I’m saying is if Lana and May are correct, you could take some tips from the Miller- AH!” Santi scooped you up, slinging you over his shoulder.

Despite his words, he was clearly smiling, his shoulders shaking in laughter. “I don’t need jack shit from the Millers!” 

“Except this party”

“Except this party! Now, let me show you a little hint of what my wifey will get.” With that, he carried you into the bedroom, promptly greeted by a giant blanket collage of Nicolas Cage.

“Babe. What the FUCK!”

***********

Hope y'all liked!!!!

Dolli I hope you had a great birthday!

Tomorrow I'm decorating my classroom with baby yoda decorations, giving my day care class party favors, and bringing them cookies.

then this weekend thank GOD i have friday off and im going camping

@eyelessfaces @my-secret-shame-but-fanfiction @my-secret-shame @whatthefishh @miraclesabound @littlenosoul @fandxmslxt69 @campingwiththecharmings @melodygatesauthor @moonknightly @ahookedheroespureheart @jake-g-lockley @kittyofalltrades @milkymoon2483

[rahleeyah]

I didn't watch the txf revival when it came back - at the time I didn't have cable and was short on time and disinterested in fighting to get my hands on it and I possess an inborn distaste for revivals in general - but 🐝 was determined that if we were going to watch the show we were going to watch the whole show. I know a bit about the major plot points and was concerned about whether I'd actually enjoy it, but we started it yesterday and binged 4 episodes in a row (🐝 had a medical procedure on Friday and we aren't doing shit this weekend while she recovers). Usually I tap out of TV watching around 9 or 10 pm but I gladly stayed up well past midnight to keep watching. I was struck by how well they recaptured the tone of the original series. The humor, the whimsy, the heart. One of the standout hallmarks of the show in the original run was the elevated, poetry-prose of the dialogue - more especially the voice over monologues, but it certainly appears in the dialogue; my touchstone, my constant - no one talks like that!! But it works, bc it's a show completely unconcerned with carefully reconstructing reality as it is and instead focused on ideas, and that, too, is present here. Conceptually the revival has, within the first 4 episodes, made itself a natural continuation of what came before. It isn't trying to remake itself in the style of the times; it has, so far, remained true to the heart of what came before.

Even breaking up MSR, while I was at first pissed off about that choice, feels in harmony with the original run. They weren't ~together for 1-9; they obviously fucked - shout out to all things - but mulder was gone for most of two years afterwards! He was gone and then suddenly he and Scully have to learn to live together while he's hiding out. They are fraying in I want to believe; Mulder has always struggled to live with himself when he doesn't have a purpose, and he's hard for Scully to live with when his purpose blinds him to everything else. She tried to leave him in the movie!! They were already coming apart. And I think that makes sense; she has a job, a life, is trying to put the past behind her, and Mulder is hungry for the past and the meaning it gave him. They weren't united in a common goal, anymore. And their relationship has always been difficult; how often in 1.0 do they argue and snipe at each other, rub each other the wrong way? They're complicated people, and it's not outside the realm of possibility that they fell apart without common purpose.

And their breakup is part of what makes 2.0 so resonant with the first 9 seasons. The affection and the deep care is there, colored by the strain of two people who aren't in what we'd consider a traditional romantic relationship. They love each other, they want each other, but they're at odds with each other. That tension is compelling to watch.

So idk. I may change my tune as we get deeper into it but so far I'm really enjoying the revival.

[ourflagmeansgayrights]

ofmd s2e1 rewatch where i pause to jot down my thoughts and other random shit

not quite a reaction post bc i've already watched the whole thing. not quite a liveblog bc it's one post and it's probably gonna take me a full hour to get through a 28 minute episode at the rate of pausing and typing i'll be doing

s2e1, s2e2, s2e3, s2e4, s2e5, s2e6, s2e7, s2e8

anyway, pirate time:

i love how much fun con is having choking on his own blood

dream!stede's extremely teary face right before he takes off running down the beach is doing psychic damage to me

also dream!stede's stupid ridiculous outfit with all the long ribbons and shit...

ed and stede make contact so hard shjfkhsgjkfd the loud OUGH sounds from both of them

also the return of ed's old beard! i didnt expect to see her at all this season, so that was a surprise.

"babe" "love" im tearing out my own hair

stede has yet to learn that ripping ass near your beloved can be a love language

stede is a terrible fucking roommate just deal with wee john's gas in silence like the rest of them. goddamn.

WHO HAS THE OUR FLAG MEANS DEATH TRAMP STAMP. WHO IS THAT.

i like when the background OST is familiar to me lol the little strings when stede starts his letter throwing me back to s1

olu: that–that's the swede the swede: Im the swede roach: he's single ;) me: *pissing my pants with laughter*

also the direct confirmation that the swede literally doesn't have a name. incredible

shjkfhdhfkj the crew encouraging him. stede's "it's okay" and roach "be brave" im CRYINGGGGG

stede doing customer service is something that can be so personal. "reservation?" "eat my fuckin' shit" "right! walk-ins, then" average restaurant experience

the random background guy saying "my favorite hand!" abt getting stabbed in the hand is making me giggle. i love the humor on this show

why does stede have so much shoulder movement going on when he's walking through the bar. whore behavior.

"this is for mom!" sorry but i want to know more abt whatever's going on there

also the purple mohawk. dope.

buttons is so distressed LET HIM RETURN TO THE SEA THESE CONDITIONS ARE INHUMANE

"i know the odds of you finding this are slim but so were the odds of us finding each other in the first place" IM RIPPING OFF MY OWN SKIN

also stede's lil sad hopeful smile after throwing the bottle... i care him

i love how they make this wedding fucking suck so we don't feel too bad abt the whole massacre thing. "the natural condition of humanity is base and vile. it is the obligation of people of standing, such as yourselves, to elevate the common human rabble through the sacred transaction of matrimony" if i was at a wedding and the officiant said that i'd also start killing people probably

yayy murder montage :)

FANG BREAKING THAT GUY'S SPINE OVER HIS KNEE

the whole cake scene is so fucking funny im sorry. i love u jim drawing the line at attacking a shitty wedding. i love u archie who wasn't here for the good old days so you dont really see a problem with how things are. i love u frenchie with ur box in ur brain that u never open again. i love u fang it's gonna get better i swear. i love u frenchie again bc u just took the cake right out of fang's hands while he was fucking sobbing hfjhgkjhdkjkf

I MISS IVAN JUSTICE FOR IVAN. wish they could've said he'd just fucked off somewhere instead of dying but i think that would've raised the question of why hasn't anyone else fucked off since they all seem so miserable

very relieved that stede isn't taking the racist/antisemitic caricature drawings of ed to make like a boyfriend scrapbook like some people were theorizing. would've been overkill if after episode 4 from last season stede still didn't realize that ed hated these sorts of depictions of him.

INTERESTING DETAIL THO the background music in this scene is "a pirate's life" aka the song frenchie sang in the pilot. it's an instrumental version obviously but yeah i recognize that tune

also more cool background ppl with dyed hair man i love this show

zheng yi sao flirting with olu is so good. he deserves it.

how nice of ed to offer his drugs to the crew. sharing is caring.

also it's so funny to me that the thing izzy is tormented by is ed saying "you can't do the job, someone else will" the toe thing's happened three times and apparently that was fine but the thing the show edits together right before izzy breaks down into the most pathetic aheemheem whimpers isn't any of that it's ed threatening to fire him

also they cut ed throwing knives at izzy!! what the hell.

releasing the clip of izzy crying kinda ruined it for me when it came time to watch it in the show bc i watched it several times since it dropped and now seeing it in context i was like "ok i've seen this already fast forward." i mean i didnt fast forward through it but i did kinda zone out bc i've seen this bit already. this post kinda sums up my thoughts on it

"trifling ingrate plan" dshkjfshgdskhfjkhgkjh

"SEMI-CLEAN WATER"

JACKIE CALLING THE SWEDE "BOO CAKES"

"i know that guy we had breakfast together!" "you'll be having a lot of breakfasts-es together" "oh, okay" i fucking love this whole dynamic like i can tell they're writing the swede out of most of the episodes for budget reasons (sorry nat faxon) but by god do they give him such an excellent fucking send-off. can't wait to see him again when he's in his trophy husband number 20 era

roach is upset abt not being able to cook, buttons is tied up so he doesn't go running back to the sea (i assume). stede you are not giving your crew the environment they need to thrive.

olu being an optimist :)

buttons opens his mouth to drink the rain and in the background u can see roach yanking the rope around buttons back fhdjskgfjhgkjfh STEDE YOUR SEA WITCH CANNOT THRIVE IN THESE CONDITIONS

stede tries to make things sound good in his bottle letters to ed but out loud he says his actual insecurities... it's so fucking tasty tho that he thinks ed could be doing better without him and THAT'S why he's been stalling so much. not afraid for his life even a little bit he just assumes he's not wanted. brb i have to cry now

"im sorry if that's a little bit creepy" "you are creepy" in this scene where they're soaked from the rain. ofmd said this prince ricky guys is creepy and wet.

stede's fucking FACE when prince ricky says "you're my hero" his fucking "clearly you dont own an air fryer" face I CANT STAND HIMMMMMM (affectionate)

prince ricky "these rubes" "men of our standing" yeah i cant fucking stand this guy (derogatory) i love how he's barely even in this episode

stede's face when the swede is talking abt how happy he is with jackie... my man believes in love so much im gonna cry

also in what fucking way does the swede owe them a life debt. roach and buttons literally tried to eat him

izzy's "you know me better than anyone knows me and i daresay the same about you" this is literally so false i dont even know where to begin. izzy in e6 being like "if i didnt know any better i'd think maybe ed might possibly maybe be actually enjoying bonnet's company" while ed and stede are giggling and making each other friendship bracelets. this guy doesn't know ed at all.

also i cant get over how izzy wont make eye contact he's like staring blankly into the middle distance delivering these lines so flatly until he goes to say "i have... love for you" and in that moment he looks like he'd rather ed were feeding him more toes.

"im worried about you, we all are" not gonna lie my dude you've had a weird way of showing it thus far. where was all that worry when you told him he was better off dead than wearing a robe and singing songs?? where was that fucking love then?

and NOW izzy wants to talk it through. izzy literally voted to make blackbeard great again and now he wants to give open communication a chance???

lmao there's a limit to how many characters can be in a bulleted list so here's fucking. part two. on the same post:

ed asking everyone if the vibe is poisonous and fang cant stop crying and ed's face is just like "eh good enough" im fdhksgfkjtdkh

anyway ed with a loaded gun under his chin talking to himself is hurting me so fucking much actually. ed my beloved babygirl for whom i would die. this poor traumatized man. yes he is making this workplace toxic as hell but god. GOD. im gonna throw up.

the way ed is so fucking casual about shooting izzy in the leg. just calm and jovial as he promotes frenchie to first mate. stepping over izzy all crumpled on the floor. everything about this is so fucking good. i mean it's horrible for ed and everyone around him but for me watching the show this shit is DELICIOUS. i love when the pirates get violent and unhinged i love when this shit gets fucked up. ed's mental state is so bad right now and it is causing me severe anguish but also it is so tasty. fuck.

anyway frenchie trying to turn down the promotion fhjkghdfjkhf

the cut to the swede performing the husbandly duties is INSANE. COMPLETE TONAL WHIPLASH. I LOVE THIS SHOW.

"fuck those hammies up!" spanish jackie i love you

black pete why are you so fucking loud AND WHY WOULD YOU JIX IT LIKE THAT???

why is prince ricky so small. he's like a full head shorter than stede. also this guy is insufferable i love how stede just fucking abandons him fhjkgdhkdfghkj

"the calf muscle is the most mysterious of alllll the muscles" what the FUCK does that even mean. oh swede i will miss you

NOSE REMOVAL FUCK YES. I LOVE THIS SHOW.

obsessed with the swede playing dumb. the dramatic gasp. "wow, so bad!" fhjsghdkjf

"aint you that soup bitch?" "im the money bitch" i love women.

sfdsjkh spanish jackie being into double-crossing. and slapping the swede's ass on the way out. i love this show

i love how zheng says "this much indigo is worth three times what i paid" while spanish jackie and the husbands are still like, right there. and they just don't hear that bit. incredible.

OUGH the back of jim's weird rope armor looks like a ribcage that's so cool

i love how jim is so fucking bad at telling this story. i love how the monkey's paw comes into it. i love fang asking them to do the voice. i love archie trying to hold back her laughter i love jim and fang giggling together I LOVE THIS SHOW

ed's fucking voice breaking through his whole convo with frenchie. im tearing out my own teeth

HEY DID YOU GUYS KNOW THEY HAVE POST-CREDITS SCENES IN THIS SEASON?????????? WHAT THE HELL

i take back what i said about jim being bad at telling this story their version is so much fucking better. squeaky voice "I pray to you, Dark Lord, to make me real flesh! I want to be real flesh!" IM FUCKING OBSESSED. JIM I WOULD DIE FOR YOU

[fireheartpages]

iii. the hatred of a minute | m.m.

series masterlist

summary: long nights begin being crowded by things you don't want to see materialize, after your legal battle runs its course. the question stands: can you fight your way out of this one? or will you finally fall?

playlist: permit the righteous to be moved | m.m.

word count: 3.6k

rating: 18+, swf, canon typical violence with a slight trigger warning for assault/SA (latter only mentioned in a medical sense), slight she-hulk spoilers

a/n: (playlist starts after if i'm being honest) this quote comes from an edgar allen poe passage, "years of love have been forgot, in the hatred of a minute." hello all! i know it's been like nine months since my last chapter and honestly i shouldn't promise any more consistent updates lmfao. i've moved twice (once cross country) since my past chapter and i'm moving out of state again in like two weeks. so life has been unreasonably crazy lately, but i watched she-hulk and when she said the accords were revoked i was like are you fr rn bc so much of this fic's plot was in fact based around the accords but also i hadn't been writing bc i didn't know what i wanted to so with it so honestly that little tweak in canon made me wanna overhaul the plot and start writing again so here i am!! this is still the bare bones of where i had planned on going with the series but with some changes so that i'll actually be invested in writing it lol and i hope y'all will be invested in reading it!! also shout out to the three people in my notes who reblogged the first two chapters like two days ago that finally made me start writing, yall are awesome. this is for u. (and she-hulk) (oh yeah also matt in she-hulk!! sexy af)

March 2024

Matt could smell your hangover.

Every inch of you was drenched in sweat and vodka and sick. You stumbled into the office of Nelson, Murdock, and Page a little after eleven, half reeling, and rendering Matt more than a little concerned. Foggy met you as you made it in the door, helping you to the small couch next to his desk.

“What the hell happened to you?” Foggy asked, tossing Matt a water bottle to hand to you.

“Have you seen, like, literally any public media source?”

Matt hummed, leaning against the desk across from you. “I did. Imagined you’d take it about this well, too.”

“Thought you couldn’t see, Murdock.”

Matt chuckled. “Good to know your humor’s still in tact.” He unscrewed the bottle an handed it to you. You took it, taking a long sip, then pressing your head to the back of the couch.

“How does, like, the law work?” you asked. “Can I sue? I wanna sue, or something. Get that asshole to put his shield down.”

Foggy laughed sympathetically, walking around to take a seat. He’d told Matt you would be coming in today only about an hour ago, detailing the phone call he’d had with Bucky Barnes. Apparently he’d fished around your purse until he found Foggy’s business card and called, asking if you could come in. Neither of them knew what the topic of your visit was, but after last night’s news spectacle, it wasn’t hard to guess. 

“That’s not how the law works, unfortunately,” Matt answered you. “Also, we’re defense lawyers.”

“Okay, and?”

“We don’t sue people.”

“We protect the people getting sued,” Foggy supplied.

“Assholes,” you mumbled, eyes sliding shut.

“So, what, did you raid a liquor store last night?” he asked, voice dancing with the odd mix of sympathy and humor.

“Tried to outdrink Bucky.”

“How well did that go?”

“Can’t remember a single thing after four p.m., but at least my hangover hurts worse than the news blasts I keep getting on my phone do.”

“You can turn those off, you know,” supplied Foggy helpfully.

“Fuck off, Nelson.” Matt laughed, suddenly acutely aware of the rip in your jeans where your skin poked through unhindered. You were crowding his senses for some reason. He pushed off the desk, walking around just to give himself something to do. He noted what was happening outside the window. Someone was walking a dog, a couple was arguing, a few honks from taxi drivers, the smell of you underneath all the liquor—

Knock it off, he thought. 

He paced back around to the opposite side of the desk, balancing himself on the edge. Your voice coated his thoughts as he tried to focus on what you and Foggy were saying. 

Foggy was explaining something about the legality of the Accords to you that Matt was struggling to catch on to. You swore at whatever he said. Matt let the conversation float over him as his senses crept out to the warmth of your skin and the softness of your voice and whatever shampoo you used that made you smell so good. He dug his nails into the wood of the desk below him, something solid to keep him from drifting into whatever made him like you so much. He knew he couldn’t, knew he shouldn’t, after the alarms went off in his mind the last time he walked you home and you’d leaned into his touch just a little too much. That bit of intimacy you’d offered him, the trust you were putting in him was misguided, unearned, and dangerous. Not with who he was. Not with who you were. 

So he denied himself, as any good Catholic would. 

He was brought back into reality when Foggy directed something at him. 

“What?” he stuttered, willing his brain to come up with something a little bit better. 

“Still with us?” Foggy laughed. 

You remarked, “I thought I was the one who was wrecked,” and he clenched his jaw. 

“My mind wandered.” He took a slow, deep breath. 

He couldn’t ignore the soft laugh you gave, or the way your pulse picked up with awareness under his focus. He could tell Foggy knew he was full of shit. "What did you say?"

"Do you think you could handle a neighborly visit?" Foggy asked.

Matt had no idea what he was talking about.

Thankfully, Foggy saved him the embarrassment of having to ask. "I'm going to do the best I can to figure out how to get around this once Bucky Barnes gets in contact with Sam Wilson. I think you should pay a visit to Mr. Walker."

Matt huffed and shifted from foot to foot. "Um, why?"

"Trying to prevent a murder," he answered dryly, then pointed a finger at you. "You are not to make contact with Walker. At all. I don't care. Relay that message to Bucky as well."

You sighed and rolled your eyes, letting your head lull back onto the couch. Your hair fell away from your neck, exposing more of your skin to the air. No more deep breaths.

"I think it can be arranged," Matt said.

He felt you tense, like you were making to get up, but you didn't move. Matt rounded the desk again, offering his arm to you. "Let's get you home."

You took it, letting him half-haul you up off the couch and into a standing position. Your skin was so soft. "Coffee?" he asked.

"You buying?"

He smirked at you, then turned his attention to Foggy. "Send any updated you find?'

Matt could tell Foggy was giving him a look that he was hoping you weren't picking up on, powers or not. You let yourself be escorted out the door, down the stairs, and out of the building, the entire time not letting go of Matt's arm.

New York liked to pretend to have spring. There was snow on the ground, and the temperature was barely breaking 65, in a way that let non-locals believe there might be some warmer weather up ahead. He knew better, though. He knew New York would stay icy for a long while longer.

He walked along the streets covered with melting snow, dodging tourists and kids checking out colleges on spring break. No one paid him a second thought. People were too busy thinking about themselves. Everyone is always only ever thinking about themselves.

Even when there was so much hurt in the world. So much that needed to be fixed and yet everyone chooses to think only about themselves. Everyone chooses to ignore the help they could give others and instead make it about them. So selfish, he thought. But he wasn't selfish. He thought about other people. He thought about the betterment of other people. Of a community.

That's why it took him so long to pick the perfect person. He didn't want to call her a victim. A pretty blonde in a pinstripe suit. She had just hung up the phone. Perfect, he thought. She wasn't a victim, no. Even as she thrashed and kicked as he came down hard with a hand over her mouth and dragged her into the alleyway just to his right. She wasn't a victim, she was the beginning to the betterment of a community. Of the world.

He pushed the needle into her skin, letting the dosage sink into the muscle of her arm. He'd had to tear her pretty blazer. He was sure she'd be fine with it if she knew. If she knew she was the beginning to a better community.

She lost her fight as the dose made its way through her system, slowly slumping in his arms as he lowered her to the ground, and he left her there to wake up later, making his way back into the sidewalk as if nothing had happened.

"Are you sure they're going to let you in in your condition?"

You laughed, still clinging to Matt's arm as you both made your way to the hospital. He'd insisted on ensuring you made it there safely, despite your protests. It's either this or the rooftops, he's said. He'd bought you coffee. You figured you could start your shift off on the right foot.

"They don't care what state I'm in as long as I can change a bedpan and start and IV," you remarked.

Mat laughed, and you liked the sound. "Let me know if you ever want to unionize."

"We're med students, Matt, I'm not even a real employee."

"That... sounds like it should break some labor laws."

You screwed up your face. "Gotta learn somehow. There could be worse ways. Than legalized slavery."

"Oh no," Matt said around another one of those pretty laughs. God. Go back to when you hated him, you thought. It was so much easier than thinking he was beautiful. And God, was he.

"I'll be fine," you stated, trying (and failing) to stop staring at him in the glistening springtime air. "Couple more cups of coffee and I'll be human-shaped again. Or, med student-shaped. How about you go out there and make sure we don't get any stabbings or GSWs? I want a quiet night."

"I'll try my best," he said, releasing your arm so he could slide his hand up and down it. What a gentleman, warming you up. So polite.

You stood there in silence, trying to come up with something to say maybe to extend the moment, or maybe a dig to make it not as incredibly obvious as it felt that you really enjoyed his company. Before you got the chance, a scrub-clad energy ball launched at you.

"You gotta come in here, we got a chick with some weird-ass symptoms, right up your alley. Come do your funky thing." He shivered. "God, it is freezing out here."

"Derek, no, that's not how this works and you know it." You sighed, closing your eyes, and digging your phone, which had begun ringing, out of your coat pocket.

"It is now," Derek said, smiling like he was sharing an inside joke with you. His smile faltered when he realized you were entirely lost. "You didn't see? I thought you would be jumpin' for joy."

"See what, Perez?" you asked, funneling every inch of exasperation into the question.

"The Accords got revoked. You get to be super doc."

"What?" you and Matt snapped in unison.

You looked down at your phone to see Foggy calling and thrust the phone up to your ear.

"Is it true?" you demanded at the same time Foggy said, "I have the best news ever!"

You heard him laugh on the other end of the line. "No more collar or leash for you, baby! The Accords were just revoked for American citizens!"

"Is he serious?" Matt asked you in a low voice.

You felt like you were going to pass out.

"I knew this had been in the works in congress but I didn't want to get my hopes up, but it's happening, baby!" Foggy was going on.

"What?" you snapped.

"Effective immediately, you are no longer required to sign the Accords. No leash, no monitoring. Go have fun."

"I would definitely still check with your higher-ups before using your abilities at work," Matt supplied.

"Is that Matt? Matt, you asshole, I've been calling you for like 10 minutes!"

"Dude," Derek said, "you've gotta come see this girl."

You were frozen in place, frozen with shock until you felt Matt's hand come to rest on the small of your back. You took a shuddering breath. "So, I'm free?"

"You're free," Foggy said gently.

You hung up the phone without saying goodbye, and turned to Matt. "I should get in there." Patients first, feelings later.

"Have a good evening," Matt said, his hand falling from your back. "Text me when you get home.

You knew damn well he would know when you got home without you texting him. But you didn't say anything. Instead, you turned back to Derek as he walked away and you forced yourself not to let your gaze follow him.

"Do I have time to get scrubs?"

"This chick is wild, okay," Derek began, ignoring your question. "I'd just gotten in when she came in. Flu-like symptoms, so the docs put her on me, right? Turns out, she was assaulted walking to work. All shaken up. I went to go get the kit, but she kept refusing, thought she'd probably feel safer with a female doc. So I offered up one of the interns, but she refused again. Said she was conscious for the entire attack, and all that happened was this guy stuck a needle in her arm and left her on the ground." He kept talking as you rounded the corner into the locker room. "Scumbag, right? I wasn't sure I believed her, but she let me do a physical exam and the only signs of struggle were on her face and neck. And her arm, where the needle went in. So she's telling the truth. And here's the catch. Tox screen is nuts."

You shrugged on your white coat. "How so?"

"Lit up like a Christmas tree," Derek said, shaking his head. "Amphetamine, opiates, benzos, tylenol, you name it."

You raised your brow at him. "Wow."

"And get this, she's bleeding from every line we give her. I tried to put in an IV, blew the vein."

"You're bad at IV's."

"Not that bad," he said indignantly. "But even Mar tried, and the line started bleeding. Mar! Best nurse in this place botched an IV. Doc Cohen tried to put in a central line, more bleeding. Her pressure was skyrocketing every time we tried too."

"That would sense," you said following him further into the ER. "Eight million drugs in someone's system ought to thin the blood."

"Yeah but we get at least a central line on druggies. Besides, she doesn't have any past drug use history. Her lines are clean, man." He led you to a private room towards the back of the ER. You pushed open the door with a sigh.

There was a young girl on the bed, two bloody bandages around her arms and a bandage across her chest. She was pretty, twenty-something with her blonde hair falling out of a ponytail at the back of her head. There was what looked like a designer bag and pinstripe pants discarded in the corner, the matching jacket in an evidence bag.

"Hannah Edwards, this is one of my colleagues, she's gonna do a much better job of figuring this out than we are," Derek supplied as you walked farther into the room.

You introduced yourself with as much smile as you could muster, sitting down next to the bed. "Don't sell her lies, Dr. Perez, please. How are you feeling?"

"Like a human pin cushion with a nasty flu," Hannah said with a weak smile.

"Can you tell me when you started getting the flu symptoms?" you asked.

"Like, fifteen minutes after the guy got me. I laid on the floor, not able to move for like ten minutes. When I got up, I started to go home, but I got, like, super dizzy and feverish five minutes later, so I came here instead."

"You were paralyzed?" you asked.

"I guess?" Hannah shrugged. "I got really groggy for a while and then when I tried to move, everything felt super heavy. It took me, like, ten minutes, like I said, to get up and move. Then I felt all dizzy and came here."

"Good thing," you said. You let your ability reach out ever so slightly, creeping out to touch whatever weird sickness surrounded her.

You jumped back.

"What, what is it?" Hannah asked.

"Dr. Perez, could I see that tox screen please?"

Derek handed you the paper. "Told you, there's almost so much on there that it's unusable."

"She shouldn't be upright with all of this in her system. Have you had any vomiting, Hannah?" You read the tox report again and again, begging the number to make sense but--Hannah Edwards should be dead right now if this were true.

"Just a little nausea," Hannah answered.

"Temp's been bouncing between 100 and 102," Derek said from behind you. "That's the third tox I ran. Same result every time."

You stood up, turning to meet his eye. "Let's get this shit out of her system, please."

You walked out of the room, almost slamming face-first into your resident as the door shut behind you.

"Did you do your thing?" Dr. Cohen asked.

"I, uh--"

"She started to, but something weird happened, huh?" Derek supplied. He'd seen you break the rules with your mutation once or twice or enough to tell when you did.

"It was weird. Like her sick pushed against me. She has so much in her system she should be dead or close to it, but there's something to keep her standing," you told them.

"Which is?" Cohen asked.

"I... don't know."

"Okay, so go find out." Cohen flashed her brown eyes between you and Hannah.

You sighed and shook your head before shutting your eyes and willing the hustle and bustle of the ER to go quiet for just a moment. You let your ability reach out once again, tendrils of invisible power creeping toward Hannah in her bed. You let it lace through every drug in her system, finding familiar things like acetaminophen and penicillin, the odd things like an antidepressant, and the less familiar things you were assuming were things like cocaine and meth, until you found... nothing.

"There's nothing there."

Derek and Cohen stared at you.

"What?" Derek asked.

"All that must be a front. She just has the flu." You looked between the puzzled expression the two shared.

"A flu that came on in less than fifteen minutes," Cohen supplied.

"I'm not saying that's all it is, or all that's gonna develop." You shoved the chart back into Derek's hands. "You should admit her for observation. I need a cup of coffee."

Your phone rang again hours later and as it flashed on the table of the breakroom, you found yourself hesitant to answer.

"Hi, Matt," you said as you brought the phone up to your ear.

"Good evening," he said, his voice silky and husky and you wanted to hang up.

"Hi."

"Are you walking home tonight?"

"Alone," you said. Not the smartest idea, all things considered, but you knew when someone was going to sneak up on you. You were an Avenger for fuck's sake. You could walk home alone tonight.

His voice dropped imperceptibly lower. "What happened?"

"Nothing," you said, carefully keeping emotion out of your voice. "Busy night. And, plus, I don't really need a lawyer anymore, since the Accords were revoked. So."

Matt laughed dryly, and you felt like you could imagine his face on the other end of the phone. He sighed. "You know I can hear your heartbeat through the phone, right?"

"You're so full of shit."

"You're lying to me. Why are you blowing me off?"

"Cause I'm a big girl, Murdock!" You dragged a hand over your face. Attachment was not your style, even Steve knew that, but this guy was making that very difficult. "I don't need you trying to sneak into my bed every night."

"You have got to stop with the lying, it's getting you nowhere with me."

You screwed up your face. "Goodbye, Matt." And you hung up the phone.

Matt was not having a good night. 

He went out on patrol like he did most nights. Like you told him to that night. That was where he'd called you from, a rooftop in Hell's kitchen. Maybe he did go seeking out trouble. Getting into fights he didn't need to be in. He wasn't unaccustomed to getting his ass kicked. No one knew more than Matt Murdock what pavement tasted like. What differed tonight from most nights, though, was the level at which he got his ass kicked. 

Whatever he was stuck with, it knocked him on his ass for a good ten minutes. Groggy and disorienting, like every cell was magnetized to the floor. His throat hurt, probably a symptom of being out in the cold all night. Even Daredevil wasn't immune to the common cold. He hauled himself off the floor with great effort, shocked his assailant left him there, and a little upset with himself he let the guy get away.

He was beaten and bruised and thoroughly feverish as he sat on the subway to Brooklyn.

He didn't want to show up on your doorstep. And you'd made it very clear you didn't want anything to do with him. But he was tired, and everything ached, and if anyone could fix his potentially broken rib, it would be you.

So, no, he didn't really blame you for the shock when you opened the door to your condo and found him slumped against the doorframe.

"Matt?" Your voice was high and indignant.

"I don't--" He fell forward, and you caught him taking off his mask.

"What the hell happened?" you demanded.

"Lost a fight," he managed, letting you guide him to the couch. He felt... some sort of tickle. Something that relaxed his muscles and felt soft, like how he imagined your skin felt.

"Matt, what the hell? Who did you get in a fight with?"

"I don't--" He grunted in pain, then relief as the pain in his ribs subsided.

He felt your face contort in pain, and your breath hitch.

"Don't--" he started.

"What happened?" you tried again.

His body started to feel light, so light, as if he were floating. Then he felt you slump against him, and suddenly, sleep was grabbing at his senses. He tried his hardest to resist it, tried to shake you awake, but he just ended up falling asleep, a hand snaking into your hair.

[stranger-nightmare]

Rick Flag ~ NSFW Alphabet

A/N: the first of six alphabets I’ll be posting this week in honour of Valentine’s!! First up is Rick Flag, hope you guys like this!!💫🖤😘

This is for people 18+ only. Minors do not read on. If you click ‘keep reading’ you are hereby agreeing that you are 18 or older.

A = Aftercare (what they're like after sex)

So imo Rick is kind of clinical when it comes to aftercare, it’s almost something he feels like he has to do rather than something he actively wants to do? He’s pretty worn out after sex and wants to collapse asleep as quickly as possible, so either he’ll quickly wipe you down with a warm cloth or just encourage you to go have a shower. He will, however, give the absolute best snuggles once you get back into the bed. He will be very sweet though, probably kissing all over your body where he’s left bruises from his crushingly strong grip.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner's)

Rick works super hard on his physique, and let’s be honest it shows; he is fucking exquisite. So I think his favourite body part on himself is his arms/chest/torso, he’s really proud of how he looks and also he loves showing off his tattoos too, I think he likes to walk around shirtless as much as he can at your shared apartment.

On his partner I think he might like their eyes the most. Working at Belle Reve means he’s seen some of the worst human kind has to offer; the cold and evil ruthlessness in their eyes. So he loves that when he looks at your eyes he sees nothing but warmth and comfort and love. But also low-key Rick is an ass man too, he loves to grab a big ol’ handful of your ass whenever he can, and this man has fucking massive hands so he can literally grab your whole cheek in one hand.

C= Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

I think Rick secretly likes to cum on you whenever you’ll let him, he loves painting your stomach or your back with his load. He also loses his mind on the odd occasion that you let him cum on your face; he doesn’t tell you how much he loves it bc he doesn’t wanna pressure you but yeah he fucking loves it. I also think Rick majorly gets off from fucking you during the day at Belle Reve and having you walk around the rest of the day with his cum inside you.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Rick does, on occasion, like to be pegged. His job is super stressful, being in charge of a bunch of crazy criminals takes it’s toll ya know? So sometimes he likes to come home and just relinquish all control to someone else for once. When he’s in this subby mode he really just likes to be taken care of, loves it when you kiss all over his body, telling him what a good boy he is, and pegging him until he’s nothing but a whimpering mess.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they're doing?)

Oh Rick is very experienced and absolutely knows what he’s doing. He definitely went through a bit of slut phase before he joined the army, the army is what mellowed him out a bit. And then of course once he met his s/o he devoted himself to you completely. And Rick is super good at pleasing his his partner, mostly bc he is great at taking instructions so you’re able to tell him exactly what you want and he will obey without hesitation.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

I think Rick’s kinda into the classics, so he really likes missionary. He likes to feel himself tower over you as he does all the work to fuck himself into you. And he likes to watch you beneath him, loves to look down and see himself bugle in your belly. Another one I think he likes is lying on your sides and fucking you from behind. That’s his favourite for when you have soft sleepy sex in the morning before he has to go away for another mission. Oh and he definitely likes doggy on occasion too.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

I think Rick is definitely more serious when it comes to having sex, I can’t really picture him ever being too ‘goofy’. He can very soft and reassuring when you need it but yeah not ‘goofy’.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

I think Rick is reasonably well groomed. He doesn’t shave his pubic hair completely but I do think he keeps it trimmed and tidy. Obviously when he’s away on missions it’s not a priority and he’s not opposed to having letting it grow out but he will trim it when he can when he gets home.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

Rick can be surprisingly soft, tender, and intimate with you during sex. Especially if it’s goodbye sex just before he leaves for another mission. He’ll kiss you languidly and stare into your eyes and watch as you fall apart beneath him, treasuring the image of your face and committing it to memory so that he can hold onto it when he’s away. He’ll kinda make a big deal out of the sex you have the morning before he leaves, like he’ll wake you up super early, but you don’t mind, and he’ll just worship your body for hours before he has to leave. He’ll eat you out repeatedly before finally giving in and sliding inside you, sloppily making out as he thrusts into you and then pulling away at the last moment to watch you as you climax.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

So Rick pretty much only masturbates when he’s away on missions, away from you, otherwise he always prefers to get his sexual gratification from you. He keeps his favourite nude polaroid pictures of you tucked into his wallet and looks at those when he manages to steal a brief moment alone to get off.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Kind of a classic but Rick is definitely into choking you. He also definitely loves to manhandle you; for the most part he is a dom in the bedroom. He loves praising you, and also loves to be praised himself when he is in sub mode. Loves to leave marks on you, and loves it when you leave marks on him. I think he has a breeding kink but not like in the making you have his baby kinda way, more just the idea of you being full of his cum, being full of him. Loves watching your belly bulge. Likes to tie you up but he does not like to be tied up himself. Definitely likes to spank you too, he’s just obsessed with that ass. Loves to be called Colonel in bed. He also loves to edge you and himself, denying your orgasms for a long time until you’re both practically whimpering messes before he finally gives in and lets you both cum.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

He loves to fuck you in his office at Belle Reve, he lowkey loves the risk of potentially being caught. He loves to have you blow him from under the desk whilst he works, or he’ll sit you on top of the desk and spread your legs and eat you out like a starving man.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

You wearing sexy lingerie is a big weakness of his; if you stroll out in a new set there’s no questions asked, he’s gonna fuck you right there and then. He also loves it when you wear his shirts, especially his army shirts that are printed with his name on them. I also see Rick as the jealous and possessive type, so he can be majorly motivated to fuck you hard if he sees someone else flirting with you or you flirting with someone else.

N = No (something they wouldn't do, turn offs)

I think he hates the idea of dub/non-con stuff; he’s seen too many rapists locked up at Belle Reve and there’s literally nothing he hates more.

0 = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

Rick fucking loves getting head from you, he really really loves it. He’ll let you blow him as often as you’re willing tbh. And he loves to do it almost anywhere and everywhere, having you blow him in his office?? Oh shit yeah he loves that. And I also think that Rick Flag is a man who loves to eat pussy, it’s like a personal mission of his to make you cum on his face as many times as he can. Again, loves to eat you out on the desk in his office, but his all time favourite is having you sit on his face.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Rick can do both and we love that for him. The true duality of man is to be able to switch from fucking you hard and fast to making sweet and tender love to you.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

He’s definitely not opposed to a quickie, sometimes that’s all you can squeeze in during a day at Belle Reve. Again, with him being away on missions often, he likes to seize any and every opportunity he can with you. Ultimately if he had his way he’d like to take his time with you, and he does during his time off, but yeah he likes to steal any moment he can with you.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

I mean yeah, fucking in his office at Belle Reve is a risk within itself tbf. He’s willing to experiment to a certain extent, he will definitely listen to anything you want to try and consider it. But he has very hard limits when it comes to certain things that he won’t do, and they’re pretty much not up for debate. So fingers crossed your kinks align otherwise it could lead to you butting heads.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

Listen this man can go round after round after round, his stamina is impeccable. But, once he’s done, he’s done, and he’ll pretty much pass right out afterwards. I also think he’s very disciplined so he’s very good at edging both you and him and making a session last for hours before he finally finishes and calls it a night.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

He likes to use toys on his partners but is not so keen on using them on himself. When you’ve got the time he likes to edge you for a while first with a vibrator before he gets to fucking you himself.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Okay so I don’t think Rick likes to tease too much actually, like when he wants to fuck then he wants to fuck ya know? He’d rather get right to it rather playing games and teasing.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

Yeah I can kind picture Rick being quite loud during sex, just plenty of deep guttural grunts and groans, but only when he lets himself. And he is also astonishingly good at keeping quiet when he needs to though, like during your secret hookups at Belle Reve.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

My wild card headcanon for Rick is that he wants to have a threesome with his partner and Harley Quinn. Like he loves you and is completely devoted and dedicated to you, but, there’s just a lil something between him and Harley that I feel like maybe they need to get out of their system. I mean I’d personally fucking die at the prospect of a threesome with the two of them.

X= X-ray (let's see what's going on under those clothes)

Um yeah so I definitely think Rick is packing, like we’re talking long and girthy, he’s a big fucking boy.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

I think Rick has a reasonable sex drive, but also I think it fluctuates depending on what’s going on with him. So when he’s away on missions his sex drive is kinda low bc he’s so focused on the mission and keeping everyone safe, not to mention that he’s away from you anyway. But, when he finally comes home, his sex drive kicks into high gear and he’ll fuck you as much as he can in your limited time together. But then his drive will calm down a bit again if he knows he’s got a long stretch of time off to enjoy being with you, so he knows he doesn’t have to frantically fuck you before he has to go away again.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Rick for sure falls asleep very quickly after he’s done fucking you, the poor man basically passes right out.

Masterlist

[kiwixlime]

Finders Keepers - Chapter Nineteen

Warnings: Smut. We got unprotected PIV, oral, fingering, dom!Joel, dirty talk, hhhh idk. Let me know if I miss something. I’m tired pls and I’ve been writing this for two days bc I kept getting distracted.

A/N: Thank you for reading! I appreciate the love. Thank you so much!

NC-17, 18+, Minors DNI, etc.

Bay traipses around her house, entering each room without purpose, just waiting, hoping, for Joel to return to her. Her mind races through all the possibilities of what the man could be doing. How did he even find out about Tommy? Bay should have been the one to tell him. She should have done it sooner. She can’t blame him for being upset.

Deep down, she knows that Maria is a sensible woman. She won’t let Joel run rampant through the town, tracking down her husband. And Joel would never actually hurt his brother. But poor Tommy has an earful coming, a few threatening words, too.

She keeps glancing out the window, watching for any sign of Joel, disappointed and scared when she doesn’t see him. He’ll come back, right? Even if it’s just to fight with her, he’ll come back. He has to. After all they’ve been through, he wouldn’t just disappear.

Just as she’s ready to give up, an odd sensation runs up her spine and she turns around to see the door crack open. Seconds later, Joel’s coming through, looking a bit guilty. She stops in her tracks and waits for him to make the first move. He doesn’t disappoint, taking long strides over to her. He gives no warning as he grabs her by the hair and pulls her in for a kiss. Her worrying mind eases.

His lips catch hers, moving in a steady, yet rough, rhythm. He’s giving her everything, pouring his apologies into this kiss. And she accepts, flicking her tongue out over his bottom lip, teeth nipping at it softly. As if to show his appreciation, he kisses her harder, backing her deeper into the room, hands circling her waist and holding her as close as possible. He’s never been very good with words, but his actions say so much.

Her lungs burn, desperate for air, so she reluctantly pulls away from him, sighing at his lingering taste. She reaches her fingers up to her lips, dancing against the skin, the feeling of him still buzzing through her. She smiles and shakes her head.

“What?” Joel asks, trapping her lips in his again. He just won’t let up and she loves it.

“Nothing,” she murmurs into his kiss. “It’s just, well, that’s not how your brother used to do it,” she teases, yelling out an “ow!” when Joel bites her lip.

His grip on her hair tightens and a sinister growl catches in his throat. Bay smirks when his eyes darken and she knows her little game is working. She keeps up her act, pushing her bottom lip out in a pout, her wide eyes looking up at Joel with such purity.

“Too soon?” She asks sweetly.

“You’re so fucking bad,” Joel reprimands, backing Bay towards her bedroom. His eyes rake over her faultless body, thinking to himself that she’s wearing far too many clothes. The way that body presses against him tells him that he’s got full control over her right now, which is humorous considering that, at the moment, he’d do whatever she asked of him.

But the look in her eyes, the desperation that’s dripping from her says that she wants to be taken. She needs Joel to dominate her. She needs her punishment. Of course, he’s happy to oblige, not because it’s what she wants, but because it’s what she deserves. He’s thought about it since leaving Tommy and Maria’s. And he’s going to show her just how much trouble she’s in.

Her back eventually hits the door of her bedroom and Joel looms over her. Those lips of hers are dying to be kissed and he almost gives in, but finds restraint. Instead, his hand comes up to her throat, fingers softly pressing against the sides, gentle squeezing motions causing her eyes to roll back. He lightly jerks her head forward, making her eyes meet his again.

That menacing look crosses his face once more. “Baby girl, I’m going to fuck you so hard you won’t even remember anyone else’s name.” He threatens. His tongue licks over his lips, his body straining hard against hers. His lips drop towards her ear, licking the shell before he whispers. “All your pathetic vocal chords will be able to say is Joel.”

“Okay,” she breathes eagerly. “Whatever you say, Joel.” She whimpers at his words, falling apart at his touch. A wicked grin spreads across his face as he reaches behind her and opens up the door to the bedroom.

They step inside and he notices that her bed is still a mess, a nice reminder of last night. Just thinking about it gets him hard. He can still feel her scratch marks burning down his back, her scent still lingers on his skin. She stands before him submissive and desire burns deep inside his gut.

“Get on the bed,” he orders in a gravelly voice that makes Bay’s heart skip a beat. She nods in a daze, doing as he says and getting onto her bed. She sits back, waiting for his next request. It comes in the form of Joel removing his boots and his jacket, all while maintaining eye contact.

He smiles and closes the distance between them, crawling onto the bed and hovering over her, pushing her down against the mattress. Her body shivers underneath him, hands rubbing up his chest out of instinct. He drops his head, teasing her lips with his, giving soft and quick pecks. His fingers dance up the side of her body, featherlight touches making her squirm. Her legs wrap around him, pulling him close and he groans.

“Needy girl,” he comments, pinching her soft skin between his scarred fingers. For a second he thinks how could someone as delicate and beautiful as her be with him, but the thought is fleeting. He ignores it and kisses her, memorizing the feeling of her plush lips moving against his, appreciating the way her body reacts to even his tiniest touches.

Kissing. Such a simple thing. It never seemed important after the world ended, not for Joel, anyway. Romance wasn’t a luxury he needed, no, it was all about frustrations and getting off quick. He needed ways to let off steam and so did others. So that’s all he searched for. Bay was different though.

Kissing her isn’t a chore, it’s a delicacy. Her lips alone can cause the most intense feelings to stir inside of him. And she makes the cutest sounds when Joel sucks on her tongue, sounds that he craves to hear over and over. Sounds only he can cause. Lost in his thoughts, he grips her hip tighter, plunging his tongue into her mouth.

She gasps as he sits up, pulling her into his lap. Her arms circle his shoulders, legs wrapping around his frame as she settles down on top of him. His kisses grow needy and she smirks, feeling something else grow beneath her.

Her fingers dig into his shoulders as she moves her hips, grinding down onto his growing bulge. Moaning into his mouth, she does it again, desperate to feel him against her. He’s so big and hard and her breathing falters as he pulls her fully-clothed cunt against his throbbing cock. “J-Joel,” she stutters.

“That’s it, baby,” he purrs. “Say my name.” He pulls her quivering body down against him again, bucking his hips up to meet hers. His lips kiss down her jaw, reaching her neck, sucking dark bruises into her creamy skin. “Feel that?” His teeth bite down on the soft tissue and she nods. “You’re mine.”

Large hands drop to her ass, massaging and groping, dragging her close to where they both need attention. His hard cock grinds against her sensitive clit through their jeans and Bay throws her head back with a moan. His arousal grows with her sounds, aching dick begging to be set free and buried deep inside her pussy.

On a mission, he shifts their position, laying Bay down on her back. He kisses her again, slowly this time, licking carefully inside her mouth. Her tongue is still sweet from the fruit she had this morning and he knows the rest of her tastes just as good.

Joel settles between her legs, rutting his crotch against hers, making her cry out. She can feel the outline of his dick in his jeans, hitting that sweet spot between her thighs. Her body trembles at his assault and she knows if he doesn’t stop, she’ll cum in her panties, which is probably what he wants.

He grinds into her, listening to her pretty gasps. Her leg wraps around his back, urging him to keep moving. His hand steadies on her hip, holding her down as he rocks into her. He groans, ghosting his lips over her throat, biting and sucking and marking her up again. He’s getting worked up, dragging his hand up her body, grabbing her breast. “Darlin’,” he grunts. “I need you naked.”

She eagerly rids herself of her clothes while Joel watches with intent. He loves how obedient she’s being for once, how deprived she’s acting. For someone who had jokes earlier, she’s being awfully silent now.

Time to change that.

Joel spreads her legs, trailing one finger down over her slit, eyes flicking up to hers as she shivers. He does it again, drawing pathetic mewls out of her throat. He grins to himself, teasing her, slipping a second finger past her folds before pulling back out.

Bay moans and wiggles her hips, peering up at Joel with agony. “Please,” she whimpers.

“Please what?” Joel asks harshly, taunting her clit with mild strokes.

“P-please, Sir,” she groans, gasping when Joel spreads her open.

He growls at the name and gives in to her begging. Barely. She writhes below him and he’s getting off on watching her squirm, his fingers hardly moving giving her the bare minimum.

“That’s it, girl,” he taunts, guiding her as she grinds down on his hand, her wet heat taking him slowly. “Fuck yourself on my fingers.”

“Fuck,” she whines and tries to satisfy that urge in her, but Joel’s hold is too strong. She can’t get enough friction, she can’t hit that spot. And she curses as Joel chuckles.

“Pathetic,” he tsks. “That’s all you got for me? It’s like you don’t even want it,” he jabs. “Come on, baby. Show me you deserve it.”

“J-Joel, Sir, fuck,” she cries and he decides it’s enough teasing. He slips his fingers into her dripping pussy and savors the high-pitched whine she makes as he presses against that spot inside of her.

Her walls tighten around him, head thrown back, eyes squeezed shut, bottom lip between her teeth biting hard. He works his fingers in and out of her watching her body melt in pleasure. She’s so fucking pretty he can barely control himself.

When she’s close to her peak, Joel can tell. He’s become familiar with her body, her sounds. And when she’s nearing the edge, he replaces his fingers with his tongue. His hands grab her hips, pulling her down against his face. Her once tense body softens as he eats her out, moaning at her taste.

Her toes curl, body arching when Joel hums into her pussy. Her breathing quickens. She warns Joel she’s about to cum, lifting her legs higher, trying to squeeze herself off from Joel. The pressure around his head makes him laugh.

“Cum in my mouth, sweetheart,” he urges. His filthy words cause her hands to shoot up to the headboard for something to hold on to while simultaneously pushing back onto his tongue. He uses the muscle to coax her to the edge, licking her clit until she comes undone, squirting on his tongue and beard.

Desire pools as he licks up her mess with gentle strokes of his tongue, kissing her pussy before pushing himself up. Bay watches him undress, eagerly grabbing at him when he steps out of the last of his clothes. She pulls him down on top of her, kissing him with hunger.

His arms slide up under her, hands wrapping around her shoulders as he eases into her soaking pussy. He groans into her neck at the sensation and she wraps her legs around him, taking him deeper. Her arms find home around his back, careful of the lacerations she left the other night.

“Oh, fuck, Joel,” Bay breathes as he begins to move. “Right there,” she gasps, pinching her eyes shut.

“Look at me,” Joel orders, his Texan accent getting thicker as he starts to lose control. “Let me see those eyes…watch me as I fuck you, darlin’.”

Moaning at his words, she lifts her head up, holding onto him tighter as he quickens his thrusts, hitting harder. “Don’t stop, Joel, fuck, don’t stop.”

Her praises don’t go unnoticed with her words of encouragement only fueling his actions. He loves the way she feels around him. He’s certain he could fuck her all day if she let him. It’s those thoughts that shoot to his dick, his hands drop to the mattress and his lips find hers again, swallowing each breath she lets out.

She tangles her fingers in his hair, whining into his mouth as he fucks into her with rough, sloppy thrusts. Their lips part and he pushes himself up, looking down as his cock buries into her sex. One of her hands falls behind her head, grabbing at the pillow while the other clutches Joel’s chest, her body arching with his every time he pushes into her.

“Your pussy feels so good, baby,” he sighs. She nods, hooking her leg around his hip, keeping him close. “You feel good?”

He grabs her chin with his fingertips, keeping eye contact as his hips snap into hers. Her mouth drops open, trying to speak, but Joel’s quite literally fucking the words out of her.

“S-so good, baby,” she stutters. “Love…your cock.”

His body is sleek with sweat, slipping across hers. The room is getting hotter. The sound of skin slapping skin pierces between their moans. They’re both so close.

“Who do you belong to?” Joel asks with determination. He refuses to slow his speed while Bay bounces beneath him, her perfect tits on display. “Answer me,” he groans.

“Y-you,” she answers with haste, eyes rolling back. She falls silent, unable to form words, and Joel scoffs.

Teasingly, he slips out of her, ignoring her pleads when she feels empty. He sits back, taking himself in his hand and pumping his cock. He glares down at her glistening pussy, trailing a finger through her juices.

“Beg for it,” he demands, licking his finger clean.

“Please, baby, please,” she sobs out. “I need you to fuck me, Joel. I need your cock inside of me.”

Those are the words he needs to hear. He does as she begs, grabbing her face with both hands, kissing her hard and slamming back into her with one full thrust. His cock stretches her, knocking the wind from her lungs. She’s panting into Joel’s mouth as he speaks again.

“Say my name,” he orders and Bay has to take a second to gather her thoughts, being fucked out of her mind.

“Joel,” she whispers. “Fuck, Joel!”

“That’s it,” he purrs. He pushes up on his arms, hands locking on either side of Bay’s head. He’s close, but she needs to cum first.

Gripping his hips, she pulls him into her harder. She’s close to coming for a second time and Joel’s the only one who can get her there. She lets him know by screaming his name over and over again.

“Fuck, that’s it, take it,” he fucks her into bliss, her calls of his name give him all the energy he needs to help her reach orgasm. Her walls clench around him, squirting her juices around his cock.

His hands slide down the mattress as his hips get sloppy. Her spent body collapses, hands dropping from him and reaching up behind her, trying to grab for the pillows or mattress or anything. Her tits bounce in rhythm and Joel watches her unravel.

He keeps himself propped up as he builds up his release. Her hair is matted to her face as she breathes out his name again. He halts, hips stuttering as he cums deep inside of her. He keeps rolling his hips into her until she has to stop him.

Weakly, he slips out of her, kissing her sweaty, sleek chest. He collapses on top of her, her fingers brushing through sweaty strands of his hair. “You’re so good,” she praises.

“So are you,” he hums. “But that was only twice,” he says softly. “I think you can do better than that.”

She giggles and nods and to his delight, he makes her cum two more times that afternoon.

--*--

“Your bathtub is too fuckin’ small.”

“You think everything I have is small. Maybe you’re just too big.”

Bay squeals as Joel splashes her with water. She’s in between his legs and he was being gentle, washing her back, playing with her hair. But now he’s just being mean.

“I’ll fucking bite you,” she insists when he pokes her face, now soaked with water.

“Promise?” He mumbles in her ear, biting at the lobe as he asks.

“That’s it,” she huffs, trying to wriggle away from him, causing an even bigger splash. “Get out of my tub.”

“No,” he grumbles and pulls her back, holding her close to his chest. He brings the cloth up to her chest, rubbing soapy water over her hardened nipples. Against her will, she relaxes at his gentle touch. He’s so sweet with her sometimes, she can’t believe he’s the same man she’s heard so many violent stories about.

But she knows what that’s like. And she wonders if Joel ever thinks the same about her.

Though most of her secrets are out in the open now, there’s still one more thing Bay hasn’t shared with Joel. Her past with a certain group in Pittsburgh, one doesn’t like talking about. But it’s time.

She’s heard Joel make comments here and there about Bay being too good for him. She’s too pure, too sweet, and he’s a monster, blah blah. But that’s not true. And Bay has to tell him, even if that means he sees her in a different light.

“Hey,” she says, getting his attention. He stops fucking around with the water and soap and rests his chin on her shoulder.

“What’s up?” He asks, calmly.

“I have one more secret to share with you,” she says softly. A frown crosses Joel’s lips, wondering what else she could possibly be hiding.

“If you tell me you had an affair with Maria, too, I’m just going to feel so left out,” he teases.

This makes Bay laugh, losing her composure. “Oh, you idiot,” she chuckles and pushes herself up. Water drips from her body and Joel follows like a puppy dog as she gets out of the tub, wrapping herself in a towel. “Promise you won’t hate me?”

“Babe,” he deadpans. “I will never hate you. Even if you break my heart…” He stops before he goes any further. “I won’t hate you, I swear.”

She nods and tears start to well up in her eyes. He goes to take a step forward, but she stops him. “I’m okay,” she assures him. “I just…I have to tell you. Joel…I used to be a hunter.”

Masterlist

[unfortunatelyilikebnha]

Me making headcanons for friendships that get little to no screentime but I’m way too invested in anyways? More likely than you’d think 🥰 (it’s been a while since I’ve done a long ass headcanon post so let’s fuckin goooooooo)

Gonna start with the one I think about the most often (platonic shouchako):

After Midoriya and Iida become friends with Todoroki, obviously Uraraka wants to be his friend too since he’s important to her two closest friends

She starts inviting to him to do things with her, like joining lil competitions with classmates and baking and shit

Todoroki is confused why she’s suddenly inviting him to do all these things with her but he finds her to be pleasant company so he goes along with it

They actually make a good team, especially when they’re motivated (which since Uraraka is very competitive and Todoroki is fairly competitive himself, is often). They destroy their classmates at shit like class water gun fights and prank wars. They are a truly terrifying duo and the rest of the class is wary at best whenever they’re on the same team

One day Uraraka offhandedly refers to Todoroki as her friend and Todoroki’s like “??? You wanna be my friend?” and Uraraka’s like “uhh I already am your friend? What did you think I was doing all this time?” and Todoroki (who hasn’t really made friends outside of the context of fighting)’s like “oh. Thank you” and maybe smiles a little

Uraraka is overcome with the strong feeling that she would die for him (Iida and Midoriya are like “join the club”)

ANYWAYS they like training together since Uraraka specializes in close combat and Todoroki specializes in ranged combat, and they spar fairly often

They have a running bet over who will defeat the other in training more by the end of the year. It’s low stakes (the loser just has to make the winner their favorite food), but they like the competition

Uraraka learns that Todoroki has a sweet tooth, so she asks Sato to teach the two of them to bake, and baking together kinda becomes their thing, it’s relaxing and they enjoy it. They do it both for fun and when one of them has a bad day

Todoroki buys Uraraka little gifts, like he’ll see her favorite type of mochi at the store and get it for her or he gets her a Kirby plushy because “it looks like her” (Uraraka jokingly chases him around for that one)

They commiserate with Iida about Midoriya’s bone breaking habits and general self destructive tendencies and the three of them team up to try and get him to care for himself more. They also team up with Midoriya to get Iida to be less hard on himself. They are the Midoriya And Iida Support And Appreciation Squad.

Uraraka thinks Todoroki’s sense of humor is fucking HILARIOUS and Todoroki takes advantage of this to try to make her laugh at inopportune times (almost no one believes her when she complains about this because they’re like “Todoroki? Making jokes? Seems unlikely.” Uraraka has decided that he is the incarnation of evil). She swears revenge on him every time though the revenge is usually something silly like sneak attacking him to ruffle his hair so the colors are all messed up and it sticks up funny

She’s actually one of the people he texts most often, both while they’re at school and as pro heroes (while they both deeply care about their friends Todoroki is the type to accidentally fall out of contact if other people don’t initiate, and though busy Uraraka refuses to let that happen).

Sometimes he sends her weird ass memes at odd hours of the night & when she wakes up the next morning she’s like “what the fuck. Todoroki what does this mean.” He usually just sends her :) in return which explains absolutely nothing.

If anyone ever insults one of them within the other’s earshot, it’s on sight. Uraraka got detention for a week after punching a second year who said Todoroki’s scar was ugly, and Todoroki got detention for two weeks after icing someone who made fun of the state of Uraraka’s clothes. Neither one of them can bring themselves to regret it.

When Uraraka has a bad day, Todoroki is good at silently offering her support by being near her, sometimes giving off heat or cool if she’d benefit from it, and not asking her questions but being willing to listen to what she has to say if she wants to tell someone about what’s bothering her

When Todoroki has a bad day, Uraraka notices and gives him space but also reminds him that his friends love him and offers him an opportunity to talk about what’s bothering him if he wants to + says she’ll punch whoever made him sad (he has no doubt that if he wanted her to, she’d actually do it, no matter who it was that was bothering him, which is an oddly heartwarming thought)

Whenever Iida or Midoriya teases one of them, they playfully go “friendship ended with (Iida/Midoriya), (Uraraka/Todoroki) is my new best friend” then laugh (Uraraka) or look outwardly blank while hiding secret amusement (Todoroki) when Iida/Midoriya is thrown off guard and/or jokingly tries to “get their best friend back” (they r all best friends actually so this is of course all in good fun :’) )

Todoroki knows how to braid because Fuyumi and his mom taught him in an attempt to create some nice memories while Uraraka doesn’t know how since her hair has never really been long enough to braid. However there’s a period of time where Uraraka hasn’t been able to cut her hair for a while since she’s been so busy, and her front hair pieces have started blowing into her eyes. When she complains to Todoroki about this and says she’d braid it back if she knew how to, Todoroki offers to do it for her and teach her how. She enthusiastically accepts, and brags to the rest of the class how good Todoroki is at braiding (which may start a trend of class 1a asking Todoroki to braid their hair - even though most of them can do it themselves - but he doesn’t mind). Todoroki teaches her how to braid and at first she uses his hair for practice, but she picks it up quickly and now likes to braid Tsuyu’s hair for her. They still occasionally braid each other’s hair for fun though

When Uraraka discovers Todoroki’s kind of touch starved but actually seems to like physical affection from his friends, she makes it her mission to give him more of it by ruffling his hair and playfully nudging him and hugging him sometimes. The rest of the class picks up on this and starts joining in, to Uraraka’s (and Todoroki’s secret) delight

Todoroki can and will fall asleep everywhere, and once that starts including “on his friends”, Uraraka makes it her mission to make sure nobody wakes him up unless absolutely necessary bc he’s Tired and deserves a rest

Uraraka is hungry a lot, especially when she overuses her quirk, and though she tends to ignore it and say that she’s used to it, Todoroki starts carrying snacks around with him and slipping them into her bag/locker/pockets/onto her desk when she’s not looking. She’s sure he’s the one doing it but she’s never caught him and he denies it every time she asks him about it, so she can’t really do anything about it except eat the snacks

Todoroki helps Uraraka study sometimes because Iida is great but he’s not necessarily great at figuring out why she’s struggling with certain concepts and Midoriya is great but he tends to latch onto a small detail of the assignment and ramble about it while forgetting what he was originally trying to explain and Yaoyorozu’s great but her study group is already pretty big and Uraraka doesn’t necessarily want to add another person to her plate or be in such a big group since she’d get distracted, meanwhile Todoroki’s pretty decent at identifying the roots of problems and explaining them and he’s quiet enough otherwise that he makes for a pleasant study partner. Her class rank has actively improved because of this, and she made him soba to thank him for his help

I’ll probably add more in the future but when I tried to post this a few days ago tumblr acted like this didn’t exist and tried to convince me it was deleted or smth so I’m gonna post it now while I can actually see it anyways appreciate shouchako friendship!!

[burnbrightdoll]

we are gonna talk about the order season two, bitches. like this is going under the cut so incase you are not caught up or do not give a fuck about my opinions - you don’t have to read! BUT IF YOU ARE WATCHING AND ARE INTERESTED, PLEASE DO NOT READ ON. THIS IS FILLED TO THE BRIM WITH SPOILERS FOR CHARACTERS AND THE PLOT. you’ve been warned. 

and this will be rambling and non-coherent, so be warned. i ramble a lot with this. 

okay i am going to by character, specifically talking about the knights and a couple of honorary characters and plot points. but each ‘section’ will talk about their role in this season’s plot. 

hamish: my main man. the love of my life. tundra my darling werewolf. man were we blessed with hamish this season. he looked good as fuck in every scene and we got to learn ‘more’ about him. apparently he owns an apartment and the entire building??? alright, mister ta. we love one very complicated man, but seriously, he really integrated himself into the order, with grace and a lot of work. he seemed to enjoy magic.. amongst other things. he really dove deep into the order and i understand why the rest of them were pissed at him. he didn’t handle things so well at the end if i am being honest. and we have to talk about the elephant.. he is seeing (?) or hooking up with vera stone, yes, i never expected that to happen. he was making eyes at her a lot at temple but damn, i did’t expect it. if they had any build up - it would have been fine. but they didn’t. it was sort of like... what the fuck really in my opinion. 

jack: he went through some shit this season and he handled it pretty well honestly. he may not have gone to hell, but close enough. jack and alyssa.. ya’ll i was over it pretty quickly. i love jack as a character and he was hilarious this season. him and gabrielle dating was so funny, he just got so over it, so quick, i was laughing so hard honesty. but with the whole being inducted to the order thing, again, he handled it well i’d say. he was dealing with a lot with alyssa and he had the midnight/silverback shit to deal with on the side. jack was handed a full deck and they still made him the kind and funny character that we all know and loved.

randall: my sweet boy. he went through the fucking ringer. he was at odds with the rest of his fellow knights for so much of the season. being in the order was not what he wanted and he was so vocal about it. he just tried to handle it with his usual humor, which helped. my poor randall just deserved hugs and loves AND PUPPIES. he just kept a smile on his face for as long as he could which honestly was so much. he just tried to be supportive but you could see him reaching his breaking point. he was being pushed but he didn’t break, which was really impressive to me. i also couldn’t believe that he and gabrielle became a thing, an on and off thing but still. 

lilith: we deserved more lilith this season. she was barely in half of the season, but when she was in it - iconic. she is hilarious and witty and did the most. also her and nicole were so cute and i was rooting for the two of them. i don’t have much to say because she was not in like half the episodes i swear. i am hoping when we get a season three, her reveal in the finale was just them setting up for a huge plot in the next season. bc lilith deserves more. timber does too. 

and let us talk about a few honorary characters:

vera stone: let’s not even kid ourselves.. vera stone is ICONIC. what a badass, well-dressed woman with perfect lip liner and eyeliner. she is a scene stealer and i loved her so much this season, i didn’t care for her much in the previous one so i was pleasantly surprised. i want to know more about her though, they mentioned her daughter and i want to know more about it. 

alyssa: sigh.. i liked her in the first season but god she annoyed me so much this season. her descent into what i can only call madness was boring. she was vilified to the max and i was shocked in the finale but i didn’t care much for her for the second half of the season. she was doing fine in the begining with her magic on the fritz but ugh.. she just was a huge let down.

gabrielle: i did not like gabrielle for the entirety of the first season and basically the entire second one. but, she got good development when they opened her up and truly humanized the hell out of her. she is still annoying but god, i think randall would be so good for her. he would bring out the better side’s of her and loosen her up in a good way. 

now, lets talk about the plot for a sec:

the overall plot was well paced, grounded and well-written. the characters were dynamic and the jokes landed most if not all the time, they learned from their strengths from the previous season and didn’t drag out the knights not having their memories. it was a smart decision and it made for a very enjoyable season. i didn’t love the whole alyssa, salvadore plot if i am being honest and it was strange for them to make lilith stay in ‘hell’ for as long as she did. i am, as i said, hoping that it leads to a huge plot in season three. i missed lilith in the episodes she was missing for. i did love how they tied season one back into the plot and events of this season. this season also felt so long. it felt longer than ten episodes in the best way possible. it was filled with plot and great character development. i am sincerely hoping that we get a season three.  

[trickstercheebs]

Cuddles. Your prompt is good cuddles

Really feelin myself tonight lads and I wanted to write some shit for uh... RoleSwap Benry and Gordon.

fuck...idk which version is being used so, yes to all. taggin @year2000electronics bc your boys are sticking out the most personality wise here lol

“Bro don’t you ever like...fuckin sleep or anything? You’ve been just kinda hangin out on whatever you could find everytime we take a power nap. What’s with that shit?”

“I told you, I need to guard you baseless miscreants from dying in your sleep like lambs to the slaughter..And I don’t do sleep, looks stupid if you’re any indication.”

“Wow bro...just wow, if you don’t know the joys of sleep you dont gotta lie so hard.” “I’m not fucking lying! Sleep is not required or necessary.” “So what you’re saying is....you can’t because you’re....a scaredy baby about going to sleep alone?”

“...motherfucker I will not hesitate to shoot you. I am NOT a scaredy baby!”

“Prove it then bro, come down here and sleep with me.”

“wHAT. WHAT DID YOU JUST...!?”

“If you two don’t shut your fucking mouths right now I’ll show you how to sleep like the dead!”

“.......fine. If I try it this once will you shut up about it?”

“Yes....maybe. Probably yes though.”

“...Alright fine, what do I do first?”

“Well...get off the crate first and come take a sit down beside your friend and pal Benry.”

Gordon huffed and shuffled off the crate to come sit beside Benry, though he looked like a sour faced child being told to do so by a parent. Benry on the other hand looked nonplussed and even a bit happy to see his odd friend finally taking care of himself for once.

“Okay good, you passed step one flawlessly, before you know it you’ll be a sleeping master Gordon.”

“...you can master sleeping?”

“Hell yea bro, some bros can even control their dreams and have all sorts of wild ass mental adventures. Bet you could do that yourself one day if you master the basics of sleepin.”

“...I doubt that but fine, I’ll humor you! What the hell do I do next?”

Benry tapped the ground beside him before laying back casually, using one arm as a makeshift pillow. Gordon arched a brow beneath his helmet as his hair curled in minor confusion.

“Now bro comes the ultimate test...you just gotta lay back and close your eyes..Also helps if you clear your head of bad vibes and thoughts, can’t sleep if the anger demons are at the steering wheel of your mind.”

“....most of that actually sounded like words to me. So I just...lay back? And close my eye...?”

“Yeah bro, and clear your brain of bad vibes and shit...Can’t sleep when angry.”

“Right..this sounds like a trap.”

“Nahh don’t worry, your buddy Benry will protect you while you sleep, so will the others.”

“....I-I doubt that but...o-okay fine.”

Gordon was thankful the room was dark enough to hide the flush WRONGFULLY spreading over his face..Sighing some he closed his eyes as he laid back and let his mind clear of problems.

“S’it workin yet?”

“I just closed my eyes..I don’t think I can fall asleep that damn fast Benry...”

“Lame..well lets race and see who falls asleep the fastest.”

“Wh-why would? ...Fine fuck it.”

“Helll yeah, ready? Set, go man”

Neither knew who passed out first, but Benry was the first to wake back up for a brief moment or two some hours later when something gently tickled his nose enough to rouse him from slumber.

“..whu?”

Blinking sleep from his eyes, he saw Gordon had somehow passed out..and got right up against him, close enough to drape a arm around Benrys shoulders...Gordon looked so peaceful for once, the anger faded from his features. It was kinda cute a all hell. Benry, not one to deny a bro some good sleep cuddles shifted until he was in a more comfortable little spoon position. Gordon stirred gently once when he lost the object he was holding..But he fell back under once Benry slid himself between the others arms and nestled himself against the others chest.

A soft..almost imperceptible hum escaped the guard from behind him and hiss hold grew just a bit more tighter. Benry felt Gordon cling tighter to him and was glad this gay shit was happening at night..or else how the hell would he explain the deep red his face was turning right now?

Shit Gordon was cute...and damn strong. He hoped it didn’t result in him being woken up with a upset Gordon in the morning..till then he’d let sleep reclaim him, feeling warm and very safe with his guard blanket protecting him.

[k-i-ssmyash]

Pls I would love to hear your analysis on why those mitski songs fit each iz boy (feel free to ignore this but if you'd like do tell bcs I think it is interesting B) )

Oh buddy you've made a mistake. You'd love to hear the analysis? Well I love to talk; I hope your ready for the absolute word vomit and rambling that's under the cut. But yeah, no, i'll never turn down asks like this! Interact with me! I'm but a simple, lonely tumblr hermit.

Let's start off with the first post containing Zim and referencing A Pearl. I tie this song in with his (fandom assumed) character development and how it effects both his mental state, Dib, and his ideology of the Irken Empire as a whole. In a way, I think a lot of us over-sympathize or find common ground with our alien and it prompts us to victimize him and excuse a lot of his actions. And for good reasons honestly? It's easy to do so consider that he was born under the rule of a tyrannical society where flaws are looked down upon. He does wrong but to him it's not exactly wrong, is it? It's unfair to judge him and scrutinize him the same way we do humans. The show is slap-stick at it's core and despite the grim and black-humor based undertones, not much is taken seriously. Although it often ends up in failure, everything he attempts to do is to better the empire, to receive recognition from the beings they hail to about the same degree as a deity. The long and short of it is that he wants to make the Tallest happy. To prove that he's worth their time and that he can live up to everything he dreamed he could be, but the truth is that he can't. He loves the people that hate him the most. It's an abusive relationship at it's finest, really. So he picks up the most unhealthy coping mechanism: Denial. He can't accept the fact that he's a fake invader, or that his Tallest weren't coming to Earth, because it would genuinely destroy him. And why wouldn't it? Pleasing his superiors and contributing to the hive-collective is encoded in him. It's all he's ever known. I specifically chose the given lines "(It's just that) I fell in love with a war and nobody told me it ended-" because that's the back-bone of Zim's character. You can take it both literally and metaphorically if you'd like. He's invader Zim. He likes being an invader because it gives him a purpose. The Tallest give him a fake mission and play into his delusion of doing good and being someone important (of being loved, even) and never truly hammer in the fact that he's exiled--not counting the unaired episode or the bit of commentary mumbled under the Tallests breath-- because they find the situation funny to an extent. (also, what gets me just in general with it is that Zim thinks that people like him but he's actually just one big joke and ow goddamn it my feelings) Main lyric(s) out of the way there I similarly associate the song to Zim's uh 'character redemption' so to say. I think he'd struggle to become accustomed to Earth and the fact that he doesn't have to rely on commands to live his life. I relate the line(s): "You're getting tired of me (and all of the things I don't talk about) / You love me so hard and I still can't sleep / It's not that I don't want you / It's not that I don't want your touch / There's a hole that you fill" With his relationship with Dib-- platonic, romantic, whatever-- and the general give and take of it all. He'd like to assimilate and believe in the freedom given by living on Earth. He wants it and in a way Dib provides the stability he needs there and it would be so, so, easy to give in to it. But he can't because the Empire continues to loom over him and his day-to-day life. As it's been proven, without Dib there to provoke Zim, the little alien falls into a depression, not unlike the one he fell into in Enter The Florpus when he saw the truth in his mission. Dib is his substitute, essentially. (there's something to be said with that relationship and how I view it but this is already dragging on and this is only the first analysis, so maybe another time.) And lastly, I'd like to think that the Pearl the song is eluding to can be compared to Zim's PAK. The whole 'Pearls are parasites that live inside of mollusks' bit can relate to the PAK and it's purpose. But I see it more in the sense that the PAK is the second brain, a computer memory drive that grants Zim access to the memories he can't bring himself to forget or delete. I.e., "And it left a pearl in my hand / And i roll it around every night just to watch it glow /

Every night, baby, that's where I go" Every time he takes a step forward, he takes two back because he just can't let go of what he knows (the Empire).

--- As for Dib and I Bet On Losing Dogs, well, it's a little more complicated and I'm still not entirely sure of my break-down here because there's so many layers to apply. Originally when I started messing around with this idea, it was going to be centered on Membrane "My baby, you're my baby, say it to me" and him loving Dib despite his flaws. And I still think it could apply. While Dadbrane doesn't support Dib's paranormal bull-shit, and he shouldn't considering the lengths Dib goes through to prove it (bus hoping, obsessive behavior, the fucking trench-coat) he does support and love his son despite the absentness. Hence the "I bet on losing dogs" and you know, Dadbrane just being there to pick him up and have his back when he really needs to. But then we get to the last line of the first verse. "Tell your baby that I'm your baby" To which Dib, in all of his edgy glory, decided to stick his big-head in to my thought process. I saw it as Dib wishing that Membrane would pick him over Science. Kind of a plea for attention? Like: Put your work away, I know you love it but you need to love me more. Dib has got to have the biggest hero-complex out of everyone in the show. He also has an inferiority-complex that compels him to try and prove himself. Quite frankly, and pun fully intended, he is the underdog. The odds are always against him and he almost never comes out victorious in the end, in that way, I feel like Dib himself is the loosing dog. His belief in the supernatural is the loosing dog. No one will ever believe him, "I bet on losing dogs / I know they're losing and I'll pay for my place" but he's too stubborn to give up. Even if he's mocked and ridiculed he would never stop trying to prove himself correct and would continue to stick to his guns. "I'll be there on their side / I'm losing by their side" He ostracizes himself from his peers by not letting belief go. He is purposely sabotaging his chance of being seen as someone other than the crazy kid.

That being said, the next line is where his Hero-complex comes back into play. "Where I'll be looking in their eyes when they're down" in Enter the Florpus, his sworn enemy was in a funk that he knew all too well. Sure, in the end he wanted to use Zim for his own gain, but before that he sympathized with him. And in a way, he possibly wouldn't know how to act if he ever did actually succeed? I couldn't help but think that Dib, who has always lost wouldn't feel like exposing Zim would be a win? He'd miss the fight. Dib would miss the struggle of being beaten down only to rise up when he finally gets some sort of substantial evidence: "I wanna feel it / I bet on losing dogs" he hopes that Zim will come up with something big and bad not because he wants him to win either, but because then Dib has something to fight against. Along with that, the one time Dib actually broke away from paranormal to go along with his father's wishes he was absolutely miserable. He was successful. He made his father happy, he could have made something out of his life but he couldn't; the appeal of Zim and their on-going stalemate was too much to resist-- "I always want you when I'm finally fine / Someone to watch me die" -- Dib is ruining himself by obsessing over the truth and Zim would be going down, right there with him. ahaha, that was a lot wasn't it? It probably didn't make sense either as it's just my personal rambling here, but I'd be interested to hear your thoughts and opinions on it all.

[thewritingstar]

Pretty Sparks: Greens oneshot

Pairing: Buttercup and Butch (Greens)

Fandom: Powerpuff Girls

My first fic for the greens and I’m going to self indulge cause I want something like this to happen for them. The rough around the edges are actually softies.

Enjoy!!

———

The skate park was empty, which would make sense since it was 2 am on a Saturday night or well, morning.

She grunted as she landed and pushed herself against the rail of the skate parks small gate. He followed behind her landing just as gracefully and slumping alongside her. 

“Dances are stupid.” He said and he tried to lighten the mood. Even after that dreaded thing they called homecoming, he couldn’t believe she left one comment get to her.

“Buttercup in a dress? Never thought I’d see the day, well she isn’t the pretty one but it’s great that you tried.” Princess sneered. 

“Yeah, their stupid alright.” And he thought it was directed towards something other than the dance.

The sight of seeing Buttercups fist tighten and then release was odd. It was Princess so she should have no problem slamming her facing into a brick wall, but she didn’t. 

Butch was waiting for his “date” to explode on her but instead Buttercup turned around and went back to their group of friends and ignored her. He thought she looked fine in her short black dress. He didn’t see the big deal and she had a killer body to fill it anyways.

But apparently not everyone, Buttercup, was that convinced. They ditched after a few minutes once she couldn’t stand the stares and gossip. They thought they could whisper but the super hearing she was blessed with was now a sick joke.

He had heard it too but followed her out instead of doing something to those stupid fucking girls that follow Princess around like lost dogs. 

And now they were here.

“Listen B, fuck those girls. You’re Buttercup. The Fucking toughest fighter, who gives a shit what they think?” He said but the energy was unmatched.

She was silent. Head full of thoughts and toying with her fingers.

“Buttercup, please do not tell me you are hung up on the petty comment.” He said blankly. “It was Princess. She literally hates you.”

She said nothing but looked down, ashamed at herself

“Oh my god.” He laughed again. “Did you and Bubbles switch bodies when I wasn’t looking? Since when do you care what others think?”

Her lip twitched and in that moment the silence shifted.

“Oh.” His lips turned to a frown. “That did get to you huh?” 

“It’s not that I don’t think I’m pretty.” She huffed. Her body slouched against the rail and her head went down before she looked up towards the sky. “I just don’t really feel pretty.”

He gave her a questionable look. “So you know you’re hot but you don’t feel it? Weird. Like I know I’m a hot piece of ass.”

She raised her eyebrows fast at the comment and put a hand thrown her hair.

“Yeah well you’re siblings aren’t two of the most sought after girls in the world. Long flowing hair and perfect smiles. I’m just the brawn, the muscles. Ha, most people think I’m a boy.” She rolled her eyes. “Not even me in this stupid dress can convince them.” She fluffed up the bottom angrily.

He wanted to laugh at her joke but the look on her face said other wise. He’s seen her mad, borderline raging with blood on her face and throat going dry from a scream. He knows the face of focus, eyes draw narrow and tight lips and he’s even seen her break out into a loud cackle and snort milk up her nose. He’s seen it all.

But this.

This look was one not in his Buttercup Pokédex. Her eyes held nothing, just sadness like a dog wet from the rain. Her cheeks were puffed out, red but not with anger, more like bitterness. Her stance was fragile and timid and if you were to poke her, she might just break. Everything he thought he knew about her vanished in front of him. A new and insecure side of her, he had never seen. 

He hated it. He hated that she could just lose herself like that. That the the crown she wears on her head could be taken easily and snapped in half. She was a bad ass. he wanted to see the fire and the sparks that ignited her. He wanted to see her bold and dark side, not this wimpy mess of a girl. He knew her better than that. She was better than that. 

She shouldn't have to feel less than towards her sisters. No. He knew she was the best one. The way she flies across the sky or delivers a soul sucking punch, that was the Buttercup he loved to see. 

Loved? No, he enjoyed seeing her like that. Yeah. 

-

Her shoulders shook from the cold and she cursed under her breath for not bringing her jacket. Without hesitation, he shrugged off his suits jacket and placed it over her shoulders. His fingers lightly feathered over her bare shoulders and his hands came to the collar of the jacket. 

She shouldn’t doubt her beauty. 

“I don’t think you should compare yourself to your sisters.” He spoke. 

Was he sweating???

“Look your sisters may be pretty and nice and all but you.” He lightly punch her shoulder. “You have this fire and determination. This power that just oozes out of you and commands everyone to look your way whether you notice or not.”

His eyes focused on a near by tree as he bit his lip. “You have this killer smile and boss attitude, and hey you’re hot as fuck.” He laughed that one off.

He turned towards her to see if he helped but he was met with a wide eyed Buttercup. Her mouth was slightly parted and her puffed out cheeks had become dusted with pink.

“And I think you look great in that dress. You don’t always have to dress up to put bitches in their place.”

Her eyes had soften and goosebumps coated his arms. He didn’t understand why she couldn’t see herself like how he saw her. Strong, powerful, bad ass, beautiful-

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

And he realized what he had done. That swelling feeling in his chest had plummeted through the roof and he felt the pace quicken up faster than what he thought was humanly possible.

“Sometimes I like these things.” She said softly.

His dark green eyes mimicked her bright one and he couldn’t stop himself from brushing an piece of hair from her cheek.

“Sometimes I want to be pretty.” She took a step towards him, their eyes never leaving the others.

He swallowed hard and he didn’t realize how delicate and soft she looked now. She didn’t know why she looked like she was glowing or why he was sweaty and wanted to hold her close.

He slowly touched her hand and she let him.

“And maybe you don’t feel pretty but-“ he leaned in, closer than they have ever been before. His eyes looked into hers, searching for an answer making sure that what he was doing wasn’t a mistake.

She nodded.

“You’re beautiful.” He leaned closers to her as he was a head taller. She was right there and he had nothing more to lose.

His lips fell to hers and he couldn’t explain it but there was a spark, an energy that passed through them. Sure he’s kissed other girls before but this, this was different. It was natural and fresh. Something he wanted.

His lips turned to a smile as she threw her hands around his neck and came closer to him, digging her hands into his mess of black hair. His own hands found her waist and he never wanted to let her go.

But a part of his deep inside questioned all of this. Could he really love-no that was stupid. He might have been born for evil intentions but he had human emotions. He knew it.

On the other hand, this was his best friend. The one who he could joke with like no one else. The one who can take a punch and throw it harder back to him. They were two puzzle pieces that had finally found where they fit.

And he decided together was the best spot. They always say opposties attrct but she was his idea of perfection and who would give up pefection for something else?

Her lips were soft against his own and even though she was made of spice, he wondered if perhaps the univserve had made a mistake because he was getting a suagr high from her alone. 

They pulled away, their breath visable in the cold between them and when he looked at her, slightly panting, her eyes were wide and she shook her head lightly before they both let out a small laugh. 

He rested his forehead against hers. “BC, what are we doing?” He said breathlessly and she only blew up her bangs before biting her lips.

“I think you were going to kiss me again.” Her hands found their way into his hair as he kissed her again.

Their first kiss was soft and sweet but this one held a flame they both craved. It was egar and desperate, they both knew what they wanted but now that the understood the other, it was like a full throttle.

She had forgotten how cold it was as her body became kissed with flames. She felt cold metal press under her thigh as she realized he had lifted her up and set her ontop of the rail, settled in between her thighs so now she was the one leaning down.

Her hands kept around his neck as he had one around her waist and the other on the bar, she wasn’t scared that he would drop her, it was only a three foot gate anyways. Her head tilted to feed into the kiss and she swore she had become captivated by his cologne.

Buttercup had long forgotten about the comment Princess made. He was right to say not to compare herself because she was pretty. He made her feel beautiful and made her feel like how she wanted too. Even in her sneakers and tee shirts, hair dripping with sweat or blood coating her knuckles, she felt confident and dare she say cute when she was around him.

She didn’t realize it until now but Butch treated her differently than others. Never the delicate girl or went easy on her, no he knew she could play rough and encouraged her best.

They say opposites attract but right now she never felt more connected to someone and that’s how she liked it.

And for him, he found her captivating as well. Being able to joke around and be gross and have cruel humor but she always laughed, egged him on, saw the light when most people only gave him the darkness.

They pulled away, more breathless than before and practically panting. Her lips felt bruised and used but she enjoyed it as she saw his own darkened lips which made her semi proud. She could imagine Blossom now, finding out that she had just kissed an enemy to them. Not even Bubbles had been as close to her counterpart...yet and Blossom could barely be in the same room as any of them.

It felt wrong but burned with passion on the other hand. She felt like she was doing something unforgivable, maybe she was. But she didn’t care.

She looked at him, his eyes were on the floor as he caught his breath. She stared at him intently, he wasn’t all that bad. And maybe she wasn’t all that good, after all, she was spice. Every one in awhile, she needed a little heat.

Maybe people could change, no they certainly can. Because her view on herself had shifted when she saw him on the first day of school. In that moment she knew he was always meant to be near her, as friends, or possibly more.

“Damn.” He said and looked back at her. “That’s some good shit right there.” He winked and she lightly punched his arm.

“Not to bad yourself.” She laughed.

The moon in the sky was now as high as possible and she felt the dread of having to leave. He saw her mood change instantly and he also knew she had to saw goodbye.

She slipped down from the rail, dusting down her dress and making sure she didn’t look like she had gotten caught up in a trap. The jacket was slid off her shoulders as she handed it back to him slowly. The cold air hit her skin and she wished it was on again.

A small frown appeared as he saw the black jacket being handed over.

“My sisters.” She said and he nodded, no one needed to know.

“Yeah. Guess I’ll see you Monday?” And she gave him a small smiled before turning and walking out the gate.

He watched as she walked, just reaching the edge of the entrance before stopping. She turned on her heel and soon she was in his face again before plastering a wet kiss on his lips quickly. She pulled away and a giant smile broke out on his face.

“Thank you.” She said quickly. “For saying those things.”

“What? That you’re beautiful?” He smirked.

“Um. Yeah.” Shy Buttercup, added to the Buttercup Pokédex.

He laughed a little before kissing her cheek softly, she never thought he could be so gentle. “I may be a thief and an occasional villain, but I’m no liar when it comes to precious things.” He winked and her cheeks went up into flames.

“Uh haha, yeah.” She smiled. “Um I should go.” She pointed behind her and took off with her green streak gracing the sky.

He watched as she left and his super hearing picked up a feathery giggle that came from her lips. Giggling school girl Buttercup has been added to the Pokédex.

A low whistle left his lips as he slapped his jacket over his shoulder and walked out of the park and towards his place.

He didn’t even notice that his smiled never left his face until he entered the house to see Boomer passed out of the sofa and Brick sitting in a chair drinking milk.

“The fuck are you so happy about?” Brick asked as Butch just waltzed to his room without even responding, he just hummed lightly before shutting the door and collapsing onto his bed.

“I’m fucking whipped.” He whispered to himself before the weight of sleep crashed onto him like a semi truck. The only thing he could think of was how pretty a black hair girl with bright beaming green eyes looked. And how much better she tasted.

———-

I hope you all enjoyed!!!

[futurewriter2000]

How I see the signs

Aries man: He is really nice but loves to tease and joke around. His jokes can be rude sometimes but he can be a good person.

Aries woman: She is sociable af. Loves trouble for some odd reason but keeps herself restricted to the rules. So she would hang out with bad but she herself is really responsible.

Taurus man: Can't keep his mouth shut. Always commenting on something, sucks at jokes because he is looking everything with so much logic. Really cool once you get to know him. And caring.

Taurus woman: Hardworking. She is ambitious and she gets what she wants with hard work. She doesn't settle for less. She wants the best.

Gemini man: I love gemini man. He is funny and loves to talk. He talks too much but in a way that you like it. He is very charming and cute.

Gemini woman: Yeah I don't like them that much. They have two sides and you never know which one to expect. Loud and funny, sociable and can't keep a secret to herself. Loves embarassing people no matter if it's meant for public or not.

Cancer man: He is such a sunshine. Emotional but really doesn't show it and hides it really well. He can't handle emotions too well so he just tries his best to hide them... Tho it shows.

Cancer woman: Really chill. Brave tho. She loves sticking up for what she feels it's right. Emotional. She can hide them but she doesn't want to.

Leo man: oh leos...prideful af. Wouldn't go over their pride for any price. Good liars and actually care so much but never know how to show it so he comes out as an asshole.

Leo woman: Strong but also fragile when it comes to heart matters. She pretends not to care but she really REALLY cares. Confident in her actions.

Virgo man: Critical but great humor. Sociable and loves to talk. Tho he never talks about his private life because he loves keeping private things private, it's what makes him so mysterious and sexy.

Virgo woman: Shy and quiet at first, once you get to know her she is crazy and funny, never shut ups. She can kill a bug and then feel sad bc she feels guilty for killing it. She hides her feelings and never shows the real her which makes her come out as a cold hearted bitch. (but real marshmellows on the inside)

Libra man: Gentlemans but fake af. Very good at seducing and at getting what they want. Hard to figure out when are they sincere and when not. Bit weird but likeable weird.

Libra woman: Complicated. And fake. She wants to be the dominant one in the relatioship. Confused when in love. She is kind of like in denial when she is in love. Would be a complicated mother.

Scorpio man: Sexy. I find them sexy. He just knows how to show what he wants you to show. Whether is it sexiness or anger or joy... He just shows it in the best way possible.

Scorpio woman: Like a scorpio man. She can be really sexy but on the other hand she can pretty much be the messiest woman in your life. Shows you what she wants to show you.

Sagittarius man: where. To. Start? Wouldn't give you the thing or a person he loves for any price. Would do anything to keep it. Dont trust him too much. They are decieving but are kinda okayish.

Sagittarius woman: Honestly, she doesnt give a fuck what anybody thinks. Especially if she was a kid being bullied at a young age than she would show them who they messed with. She is really smart but can sometimes think really selfishly.

Capricorn man: Sex. All he thinks about. And money. How to get money. He is actually a really good person (loyal like any other earth sign) to trust with finances but God never trust him with a girl. He'll have her wrapped around his finger in a second.

Capricorn woman: Loud and doesn't care if she hurts anybody's feelings.. I mean she does if it's the person she really cares for but not if you're just a classmate/stranger/friend of a friend. Isn't quiet for anybody.

Aquarius man: Pff... Be careful of those. They can charm you with a few words and you're done for it. They know how to make you fall in love but when he falls in love that's... That's a challange for him. He grows confused and doubtful.

Aquarius woman: So insecure but so goddamn beautiful. She can't walk away from someone who is really close to her. Ever, never. She is emotional af. Cries at everything but she is also really tough. She will never tell you whats wrong.. But you can guess when it is when she starts distancing herself from you.

Pisces man: Those charming motherfuckers. He doesn't have to do a thing and you'll fall for him like a domino. Popular. Lovely smiles but can be a prick sometimes so be careful of those.

Pisces woman: Either really open or very reserved. They can really make your day better with everything they do but they can also piss you off by being too naive and with their moods. They are really confused and not deternined and that can be really annoying when picking somewhere to go or what to do.

[irrelevantwriter]

Spellbound

Pairing: Chief Jim Hopper x Witch!Female Reader/You

Rating: Explicit, NSFW

Warnings: Language, oral sex (female receiving), fingering, unprotected vaginal sex, mentions of bodily fluids, dick Hopper (bc I don’t want him any other way)

Word Count: 1.5K

Summary: You’re the new resident in Hawkins. But Chief Jim Hopper senses something isn’t quite right with you and he’s dead set on figuring out what that is.

A/N: In honor of spooky season, I wrote this completely necessary Jim Hopper x Witch piece. It was intended to be something completely different, but I can’t hide my true self so it turned out smutty and slightly twisted. I hope you guys enjoy and share with your friends!

P.S.

I know I have some requests to fulfill and I am actively working on them! I was in a bit of a rut, but hopefully this will end that. Thanks for being so patient.

*Masterlist in bio.

**********************

Your deep purple nails clung to the black sheet beneath you, your body contorting in ways that should be impossible. Fire rushed through your veins while sweat dampened your skin. Your cries echoed off the walls and while it might appear that you were in the most debilitating pain of your life, you were actually experiencing pleasure beyond your wildest dreams.

A man was ravaging your neck while his heavy body pinned you to the bed. His bearded face burned your skin, but you yearned for more. His meaty hands gripped your body in animalistic hunger, a thin string of control barely present. His deep voice sent shivers down your spine as he growled and cursed in desire and exertion.

Your eyes were screwed shut against the deep, penetrating thrusts of his hips up into yours. His movements were erratic, touching you with both gentle passion and wild abandon. You craved more.

You were sure your deep red lipstick was smeared against your cheek, the residue already showing itself in his facial hair. His hair was tousled, his own flesh reddened and glistening from your activities.

The man was a special one. He wasn’t just any townie. He was the Chief of Police. And he was under your spell. Literally.

Jim Hopper hadn’t liked you from the moment he spotted you. You were new in Hawkins and had just purchased a storefront right off Main Street. You sold homemade lotions, oils, and candles. Products that were advertised as harmlessly holistic. But somehow Chief Hopper knew better.

He’d come snooping around your shop, eyeing your products with a mixture of curiosity and distaste. He’d asked you questions about your life, prodding like the law man he was. You’d obliged him. Being overtly accommodating and sweet to throw him off.

It hadn’t worked.

He was suspicious and you had to keep just as much of a close eye on Chief Hopper as he did on you.

Which is exactly what led to him fucking your brains out on Halloween night.

You’d known he’d come sniffing around your place tonight. He was probably going off the stereotypical ideas he had of witches. A chilly Halloween night complete with cat sacrifices and bubbling cauldrons. He was somewhat right.

Because of your unique senses, you’d been anticipating his knock at the door. You’d answered, no longer playing the innocent card. You didn’t bother to tighten the sash of your black robe, instead choosing to let it fall open slightly. The hint of cleavage would add to your favor.

He’d walked in adorned in fill uniform, all hulking frame and thick limbs, studying your home with careful interest. He made an excuse about wanting to check in on a single woman living alone.

It was bullshit.

The man was nosey. And attracted to you. You’d picked that up from the start. And it wasn’t one sided.

Part of your appeal as a witch was your mystical aura and blatant attractiveness. It’s what kept the men coming. Town after town. Always a lost man who found you irresistible and the answer to all his problems. And Chief Hopper was no different.

You’d made him a cup of coffee. Laced with your own herbal blend of course. And you waited.

It didn’t take long.

He was shoving you against the wall and devouring his mouth with yours before you could ask if he wanted another cup.

He’d tasted like cigarettes and caffeine. He smelled like faded cologne and the autumn air. It was hypnotic.

Clothes were shed quickly, the urgency and clear need apparent. You were wrapped up into his arms, his lips tasting your bare breasts as you directed him to your bed of satin and velvet.

He’d thrown you down and barely gave you a chance to breathe before he was burying is tongue deep inside you, pulling your nectar straight from you as if you were the juiciest peach. Your fingers pulled at his roots, urging him to take you to that point but begging for mercy.

You found that Chief Hopper wasn’t a merciful man.

He punished you with his mouth, adding his fingers as an extra device of torture. He forced your first orgasm from you, his manic eyes taking in all your convulsions and shivers with pride.

You’d felt him climb on top of you, not giving you a choice in the matter. He split your legs open and took you for his own pleasure.

Your teeth bit down on his shoulder as he thrust hard and deep. His brow was furrowed, almost as if he was angry. You liked it. You liked it far more than you cared to admit.

“Fucking hell,” He cursed as you moved beneath him, squeezing his thick cock with your walls. Every thrust made him scrape deliciously against you, the friction exactly what you needed to crest again.

“Again. Do it again.” He commanded against your neck. You obliged, eager to feel him release inside of you.

Feeling the cum of a man under a spell was an other-worldly experience. The sensation of him filling your insides was an alternate universe of orgasmic pleasure. It was euphoric. Addictive. It was your drug of choice.

“Son of a bitch.” He rasped as he slammed against you one last time, his whole body tensing.

You used his body to rub against your clit, letting his vibrations aid you. You came with a gasp, nails digging into his back as you both took from the other.

The Chief collapsed next you, his absence making your body feel unnaturally empty. You could feel him leaking from your swollen lips, your thighs sliding together obnoxiously.

You felt his stare on you, but you were waiting for the inevitable heavy slumber that came with your concoction. Most of the men passed out and slept off the remainder of the spell. That was usually when you stole from them. A little here and there so they never noticed.

But Chief Hopper kept staring at you, a self-satisfied smirk adorning his lips. You turned to face him, enjoying the way his male gaze faltered and landed on your breasts.

“Something to say?” You asked, voice a lot more hoarse than you expected.

“You make a great cup of coffee, you know that.”

His statement was odd and it made you pause. His smirk stayed plastered to his face. It was almost eerie.

“So I’ve been told.” You replied, playing along.

He shifted up so that he was leaned against your headboard, his chest firm yet soft. You found yourself wanting to lay your head there, listen to his heartbeat.

“There’s a little something different about it though. I can’t put my finger on it.”

He snapped his fingers suddenly and you jolted, caught off guard by his jovial mood. The man was nothing if not a grump.

“It’s the blend right? A spice?”

“Why the sudden interest in my coffee making skills, Chief?” You shifted so that you mirrored his position, your sheet pulled up to protect you from the sudden chill in the air.

“I just like to know what’s in my coffee when people drug it. Call me old-fashioned.” He quipped, rubbing at his graying scruff. His demeanor was strangely calm for a man who just claimed he was drugged.

“And why would you think I did such a thing?”

He laughed, though there was no humor behind it. “I’m a cop, sweetheart. I don’t just accept shit from people I don’t trust.”

You nodded, appearing to agree with his statement.

“Valid point. But I didn’t.”

He startled you when he pounced and pinned you to your back, the sheet ripped from your body. His hands gripped yours above your head, a twisted grin on his face.

“You did. I saw you.” He ducked into your neck, breathing in your scent as he spoke. “And I switched our cups.”

Your eyes widened at his admission, struggling against his hands. You met his eyes and could tell he spoke the truth. Smug bastard.

“I’m guessing my hunch was right by your reaction then.” He leaned into your body, pressing his now hard cock against your thigh. “You use your magic wand and put a spell on it, sweetheart?” He provoked, his tone condescending.

“Prick.” You cursed, your body betraying you and responding to his movements.

You felt your eyelids start to get heavy, the endorphins and adrenaline now washing away to reveal the true nature of your spell. You weren’t worried per say, but you also weren’t sure what his exact motives were.

You moaned as a calloused finger danced around a pebbled nipple, his greedy mouth reaching down to suck harshly at the appendage. You writhed beneath him, trying to stay alert but feeling your mind starting to slip into unconsciousness.

You felt like you were floating and the last image you saw was Jim Hopper’s face as he spoke to you.

“You get some beauty sleep and I’ll be here when you wake up, sweetheart. We’ve got some more business to tend to.” He caressed your face softly, but you could tell even in your drowsy state that he was not going to be gentle once you woke.

You couldn’t wait.