#assisted living in detroit michigan
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Meet the cast—
Au Masterlist!!
Yvette “Eve” Liu—
She was born in upstate New York, her father a lawyer and her mother an Educational Assistant, her two younger siblings were born years later in Michigan when they moved to Plymouth when their father was offered a senior partnership at a law firm.
She tutored a bunch of the usntdp boys in their junior and senior years, and that's how she found her Jack
Jack was very different from the other boys she put up with, he had a politeness that made her swoon. He never interrupted her, always paid attention, and always followed his sessions with a quiet thank you which had her in a puddle every time he left the library.
There was never a session where she hadn't shown up home after with big heart eyes.
Eve was always very school-oriented throughout her life, loved education, and loved furthering her understanding of the world, so naturally, she chose education as her career path
She goes on to study education at Rutgers and becomes a high school history and English teacher by 22 (started her teaching practicum at age 20, so technically she was teaching at 20h
Her and Jack ending up in the same city was a coincidence; her cousins who lived in New York were also going to Rutgers for their degrees, and she wanted to be close to her family, so she followed them. Jack just happened to get drafted there just a few months before her freshman year began
She had a cat in college, but she had to give it to one of her college friends when she moved into her apartment because Jack was allergic to it, her name was Penelope
Eve and Nico are also very close, Jack's real wife and his work wife are best friends and always team up against him, he gets either very upset at their kicking or very jealous that is wives love each other more than they love him
She owned a little box of every little thing Jack had ever given in her room, and he never found out till they moved in together in her senior year of college
She named their daughter, an ode to one of the more influential women in her life, her grandmother, and that's how they ended up with little Mei Hughes.
Mei and Jack are her entire life, and it's as simple as that.
Jack Hughes—
Jack was pretty sure Eve hated him their first few history tutoring sessions together, he could barely string sentences together, his palms were soaked, and he was a ball of nerves because she was just so pretty.
He was so blind to the fact that she was equally just as into him as he was to her. He accidentally misunderstood her asking him to homecoming in their junior year as her asking them to go as friends so when he picked her up she was expecting a cute little corsage and to maybe take some photos and instead, he showed up at her doorstep with Trevor and Alex.
Jack would never live that moment down for the rest of his life, but he definitely made it up to her a year later when he asked her out, as not-friends.
She definitely fell first but he fell harder.
Jack cried so many tears when he found out they were both gonna be in Jersey and really relied on her during his rookie year
While he was in Michigan during the 2023 season he bribed Luke with free liquor to drive up to Detroit and pick him up so he could stop at Eve's parent's house to ask for permission to marry her.
They are only engaged and plan to have a long engagement, but Jack refers to her as his wife to literally everyone
Jack is literally a wife guy, whatever his wife says goes, and everyone chirps him cause he's literally Eve's bitch, but he follows her blindly and with heart eyes and does not give a fuck what anyone says.
Jack is the girl dad at heart, and that's all im going to say cause I know you all completely understand what I mean.
Mei Jean Hughes—
Born January 8th, 2024 in New Wark NJ
Very chubby giggly baby with a head of perfect little curls
Jack asked Quinn to be her godfather during the second Hughes vs Hughes game, just days before Eve was induced. Quinn cried, but if you ask him he’ll say something was in his eye
Mei is Daddies girl for sure, she is obsessed with Jack, hates when he's on roadies and needs to talk on the phone with him before bed
Mei hates Trevor, she loves Cole and Alex, but Trevor is like enemy #1
Has Luke wrapped around her chubby little finger, he is literally Eve and Jack’s saving grace, the best babysitter ever
Mei goes through a tiara phase when she’s older
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If you have any thoughts or questions please leave them in my inbox!!!
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Upping the Ante: The Garden Resource Program
But the big leap forward for Detroit’s urban farming movement came in 2003, when the Earthworks Farm joined forces with the Detroit Agriculture Network, the Greening of Detroit (an organization primarily focused on reforesting the city), and the Michigan State University Extension Service, to found the Garden Resource Program Collaborative. The Garden Resource Program (GRP) which grew out of that collaboration started by providing seeds and some gardening resources (tilling, compost, etc.) to 39 community gardens and 41 family garden participants. But the program has grown by leaps and bounds, so that now the GRP provides a multitude of training classes, technical assistance and advice, marketing guidance, etc., in addition to providing seeds and seedlings to community and individual gardens across the city. For the price of GRP membership ($10 for family gardens; $20 for community gardens), members are able to pick up spring seeds in late March, cold crop transplants in April, warm-weather seeds and sets in May, and fall crop transplants in mid-summer, with all seedlings being grown organically at the Earthworks Farm.
During the 2008 growing season, the Garden Resource Program provided resources to 169 community gardens, 40 school gardens, and 359 family gardens within the city. In the process it distributed 32,320 packets of seeds and approximately 129,360 transplants! The 40 by 60 foot greenhouse at Earthworks farm is now working at capacity to provide those transplants, and the growth of the Garden Resources Program is still accelerating.
But the Garden Resources Program seeks to provide more than just gardening resources and skills. The GRP consciously strives to make the urban farming a communitybuilding activity. By emphasizing community gardens, where the work and the produce are shared, and community garden events and celebrations (community work days, picnics and cook-outs, meetings to plan, evaluate, and share experiences, etc.), the GRP helps strengthen community bonds as it enlivens the communities in which it operates. Megan Kohn, an Americorps volunteer serving on staff for the Garden Resource Program, came to Detroit “... to practice small-scale, intensive growing practices [because]...more people need to be growing food close to where they live...” Her immersion in the Garden Resource Program, however, caused her to “come to a deep realization that the work is so much more about the people, and the connection between people... Neighbors growing food together is powerful. We are literally building an alternative food system here...”
#garden resource program#small farms#urban gardening#urban farming#detroit#solarpunk#small farm movement#community building#practical anarchy#practical anarchism#anarchist society#practical#revolution#anarchism#daily posts#communism#anti capitalist#anti capitalism#late stage capitalism#organization#grassroots#grass roots#anarchists#libraries#leftism#social issues#economy#economics#climate change#climate crisis
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Dr. Ossian Sweet (October 30, 1895 – March 20, 1960).
In 1925, he made a down payment on 2905 Garland Street on the east side of Detroit. Black Bottom, the neighborhood where he had his office, was burdened by overcrowding and substandard housing. White neighborhoods, where much of the better housing was located, were kept segregated by restrictive real estate and banking practices. He and his wife were introduced to a white family willing to sell to them, they made the purchase, aware of the possible risks.
He, his wife Gladys, and their young daughter moved into the house on September 8, 1925. Many of the white residents were upset about the arrival of an African American family and gathered outside the home that evening. Aware of his new neighbors’ hostility toward him and his family, he arranged for several of his friends and relatives to stay in the house with them for a few days. He ensured he had a small supply of guns and ammunition to protect his family if necessary. The following day, the crowd had grown into a mob of several hundred whites who began throwing rocks and bottles at the house. That evening, several shots were fired from the house into the crowd, killing one man and wounding another. The police arrested everyone inside and charged each of them with first-degree murder. After the arrests, a series of trials ensued.
The NAACP assisted in the defense, bringing in Clarence Darrow as chief counsel. The first trial ended with a hung jury and the second trial ended in an acquittal. No further effort was made to prosecute him or the other defendants.
He moved back into the house in 1928, where he lived until he sold the house in 1958. His personal life was turbulent and took his life. The Ossian Sweet House was listed on the National Register of Historic Places in 1985. A State of Michigan Historical Marker was erected on July 22, 2004. #africanhistory365 #africanexcellence #kappaalphapsi
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Background: Adelmo "Del" Castell
Name: Adelmo Castell Age: 31 Profession: Physician Assistant
Adelmo Castell was born and raised in the vibrant city of Detroit, Michigan, as the second youngest of four siblings in a close-knit, immigrant family. His parents, originally from Venezuela and Wales, worked tirelessly to provide for their children, instilling in them the values of hard work, integrity, and compassion. Adelmo’s childhood was filled with the rich culture of his heritage, from family gatherings filled with laughter and traditional food to the stories of struggle and triumph his parents shared.
From a young age, Adelmo showed a natural inclination to help others. He often took on the role of mediator among his siblings and helped his neighbors with odd jobs. His parents encouraged this instinct, often reminding him that true success lies in serving the community. This belief guided Del throughout his formative years. He excelled in school, particularly in the sciences. He dreamed of attending medical school, fueled by a desire to make a significant impact on people's lives. However, the financial burden of tuition loomed large, and despite his best efforts to secure scholarships and part-time jobs, he realized that medical school might be out of reach.
Determined to pursue a career in healthcare, he set his sights on becoming a Physician Assistant. This path allowed him to work closely with patients while still being involved in the medical field. After completing his PA program, three years ago, Adelmo made the bold decision to move to Chicago. The bustling city offered new opportunities and a diverse population that mirrored his own upbringing. He quickly fell in love with the vibrant culture, the city's sports teams, and the sense of community that resonated with him. Del embraced Chicago with open arms, finding a position in a busy urban clinic where he could utilize his skills and compassion daily.
Adelmo’s reputation as a dedicated and approachable PA grew quickly. Patients appreciate his warmth and genuine interest in their well-being. He often stays late to ensure everyone feels heard and cared for, earning the trust and respect of his colleagues and the community. Del is known for his unwavering loyalty and deep sense of responsibility. He approaches life with a positive attitude and a readiness to help those in need. His humility and kindness leave a lasting impression on everyone he meets, making him a beloved figure in both his professional and personal circles.
As Adelmo continues to navigate life in Chicago, he remains driven by the same ideals his parents instilled in him: to serve, to care, and to uplift those around him. He dreams of one day opening a clinic that caters specifically to underserved communities, ensuring that everyone has access to quality healthcare, just as he always wanted for himself.
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"They sent an android to work with me?" ( @homelander-rp-blog hi! <3 I always wanted to write something in DBH au hehe. Feel free to pick Markus or Connor!)
Starter from Connor: For @homelander-rp-blog.
Androids: the future of mankind. Designed and carefully crafted down to the finest detail by none other than Elijah Kamski to assist humans and make their lives easier— designed to serve them, to act as slaves servants.
Something that had backfired when the first deviant had awoken and struck fear into the heart of Detroit, Michigan by committing several homocides.
It was no secret that most of the human population had always been opposed to androids in the first place; most of them either intimidated by their artificial intelligence or terrified of them becoming aware and thinking for themselves. A war that everyone feared was coming. And that’s where Connor came in; appointed head deviant hunter and designed solely for the purpose to prevent said war before it even began and to put the human mind at ease. To show that he was on their side despite the constant insults that were hurled his way for being one of them.
But didn’t they see that he was simply just a machine here to accomplish a mission? He didn’t have an opinion on anything. Didn’t feel emotions like the deviants claimed they did. The only thing Connor cared about was his task at hand and completing it in a timely manner.
Straightening his tie as he stepped out of the elevator, it was only when a voice spoke up to announce its distaste did Connor turn his head to glance at the source. A male. Possibly the man he’d been searching for. A quick facial recognition scan later, Connor’s LED flickering as the information was processed, confirmed that this was indeed his new partner. And that’s when a polite smile formed on his features.
“Excuse me? I’m Connor. The android sent by Cyberlife. I believe I’ll be assisting you going forward? It’s a pleasure to finally meet you.” Offering out his hand to shake— that was standard human greeting after all, wasn’t it?— Connor waited patiently for a response.
#hello!#I hope this is okay ✨#detroit become human#Detroit become human rp#Detroit become human roleplay
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In Old Cincinnati, Nights Before Halloween Were Packed With More Tricks Than Treats
These days, Halloween seems to kick off sometime just after Labor Day and drags on into the first week of November when the seasonal candy goes on sale and the fake spider webs sag under a load of soggy fallen leaves. In the old days, however, Halloween was restricted to two or three nights and the emphasis was on “trick” rather than “treat.” The Cincinnati Post [27 October 1922] carried the schedule for St. Marys, Ohio:
“Mayor W.H. Swift and Tony Johns, police chief, say the boys can have a good time on these nights if they don’t destroy property. Oct. 29 is to be ‘Cabbage Night;’ Oct. 30, ‘Corn Night;’ and Oct. 31, Hallowe’en.”
Let us, for the moment, leave aside the fact that this invitation was addressed only to boys, and focus on those additional nights. What was Cabbage Night? What was Corn Night? And, depending on where you lived in the United States, what was Gate Night, Goosey Night, Devil’s Night, Tick-Tack Night, Mischief Night, Beggars Night, Trick Night and Damage Night?
Donald E. Weaver, assistant city editor of the Cincinnati Post, explained Corn Night in a reminiscence published on Halloween 1930:
“Corn Night was the last night before Halloween. The kids threw shelled corn against the windows, rang doorbells and soaped a few windows.”
Weaver describes a ritual week of various mischief-breeding nights, beginning with Tick-Tack Night and ending with Halloween. A Tick-Tack (or Tic-Tac) had nothing to do with bad breath. It was a device built around one of Mom’s old sewing spools, screwed onto a long stick so that, when the miscreant pulled a string wrapped around the spool, it sounded like someone rapping on the window. It was the same principle as Corn Night, only louder.
Gate Night is somewhat self-explanatory when you picture the bygone neighborhoods of yesteryear, each little yard surrounded by a picket fence. As Weaver explained:
“The next morning was apt to find Squire Hickey’s gate hangin’ from the belfry of the Town Hall.”
Goosey Night wasn’t much celebrated in these parts, being almost entirely confined to the New York and New England region. The origin of the name is disputed, but most authorities believe it has nothing to do with poultry, and more to do with ghosts. It was a night devoted to scaring nocturnal pedestrians with noisemakers and eerie lanterns.
Mischief Night and Trick Night pretty much define themselves. Nights carrying those formal names were mostly celebrated eastward from here, but the spirit spread throughout the Cincinnati area, as Editor Weaver recalled:
“Widow Green’s cow got so used to being put queer places on Halloween she didn’t seem to mind. But Widow Green, she took on somethin’ terrible, especially the time the boys crowded Flossie into Biddy Harmon’s henhouse, ‘cause Widow Green and Biddy hadn’t spoken for years.”
Cincinnati lies at the southern fringe of an area in which Devil’s Night is observed. The real hotbed of Devil’s Night activity is in Michigan, especially around Detroit where, in some years, the riot squad had to be called out to quell disturbances that fell just shy of urban warfare.
So, how did cabbages get mixed up in all this rowdy mischief? To explain, we must return to the question of gender discrimination and the nefarious suppression of women by the patriarchy. While their brothers and potential boyfriends were out soaping windows and stealing gates, in other words, “having fun,” proper young ladies observed Halloween by attempting to determine who would become their future husbands. One guaranteed method involved cabbages. Don Weaver, apparently ignorant of the matrimonial aspects of the family Brassicaceae, reports only on the mischievous aftereffects of the cabbage ritual:
“The next night after Tick-Tack Night was Cabbage Night, when they swiped what cabbages were left in the gardens, and tossed ‘em onto front porches.”
Not so fast, Donny Boy! Way back in 1875, a correspondent to the Cincinnati Times, who signed his article only with the penname “Nepenthe,” gave the real story:
“Imagine the young belles of our city arrayed in their most-tied-backest evening suit en traine, and the beaux in their lavenderest pants, spotless diamond decked shirt-fronts, and faultless swallow-tailed coats, tripping out into the nearest Mill Creek garden, groping about among the protecting fodder for a cabbage-stalk, which, upon being brought under the gaslight, will presage by its crookedness or straightness the character of their future life-partners.”
Having done its vegetative duty as a marriage predictor, of what use was the clairvoyant cabbage? Hence it was tossed upon the nearest porch, or the porch of one’s prospective father-in-law, perhaps.
Another scrying technique, employed by boys and girls involved three bowls. One was filled with clear water, another with either mud or ashes, and the third left empty. The three receptacles were laid out in a row on a table, the subject blindfolded and the bowls reordered repeatedly. The visually impaired supplicant then felt for a bowl and plunged his or her fingers into it. If they splashed clear water, they would marry a virginal spouse. If they touched the mud or ashes, they would marry a widow or widower. If they found the empty bowl, a lifetime of spinsterhood or bachelorhood awaited.
Why did these antique celebrations fade away? One reason is certainly the expansion of the Halloween season. It was rare, well into the 1950s, for adults to take any part in Halloween festivities. This was a spooky holiday for children only. The very idea of a “sexy nurse” costume was inconceivable. Pop-up Halloween stores that open shop before the Autumn Equinox are very much a modern development.
But the main reason these “mischief nights” are no longer commemorated has to do with active police suppression. During the 1930s, Cabbage Night destruction got completely out-of-hand. The Cincinnati Post [31 October 1940] reported incidents from the night before involving flaming barricades blocking streets and tying up traffic, tool sheds being set ablaze, gangs of ruffians driving around firing rifles at windows in occupied houses, all the windows of a school being broken, piles of garbage filling alleys, multiple cases of flat tires, and dozens of fist fights.
The 1960s brought escalated mayhem as “Mischief Night” evolved into “Damage Night.” The Enquirer reported several outrageous incidents the night before Halloween in 1963, including two serious grass fires in Indian Hill and a foot-deep crater blasted in the Kyles Lane entrance to I-75. In 1986, 59 automobiles had their tires punctured by Damage Night vandals in Brentwood. In other words, the stuff your parents described as “good, clean fun.”
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if you’re hearing FREAKY GIRLS by MEGAN THEE STALLION FT. SZA playing, you have to know JORDYN CARTER (SHE / HER; CIS WOMAN) is near by! the TWENTY-SEVEN year old ASSISTANT has been in denver for, like, ONE YEAR. they’re known to be quite IMMATURE, but being AFFABLE seems to balance that out. or maybe it’s the fact that they resemble SAMANTHA LOGAN. personally, i’d love to know more about them seeing as how they’ve got those SMUDGED MAKEUP AT THE END OF A NIGHT OUT, THE CLICK OF ACRYLIC NAILS, A SMILE THAT NEVER FADES, THE THRILL OF SHARING GOSSIP WITH YOUR CLOSEST FRIENDS vibes. and maybe i’ll get my chance if i hang out around the RINO DISTRICT long enough!
STATS:
full name : jordyn penelope carter nickname(s) : n / a birthplace : detroit, michigan date of birth : 07 / 25 / 1996 parentage: sasha carter cousin(s) : tbd carter , wesley carter (40) , tbd carter , tbd carter relationship status : single gender identity : cis woman ( she/her ) sexual orientation : bisexual faceclaim : samantha logan
PERSONALITY:
( CANCER + DEATH TW ! ) jordyn is only two years old when her mother dies from lung cancer, leaving her to the care of her aunt and uncle (wesley carter's parents). they were already a big family, but they were very happy to open their homes to one more, even if it wasn't the best financial decision.
being in a family that cared so much about each other definitely shaped her personality in a huge way. they cared for others, and they cared for each other. they taught her to always share what you have, even if you don't have much.
ever since middle school, jordyn has always been the life of the party. it was her goal to be the class clown in every class she was in. it was harder to tell if people were laughing AT you or WITH you.
luckily for jordyn, she was always willing to interact with anyone who wanted to stop and chat. she wanted to make sure everyone felt welcomed around her, which is a value instilled in her by her aunt grace. and somehow, it worked. she was allowed a place at every lunch table, should she want it.
she knows how to sell herself well, considering she became class president her junior and senior years. she's confident, has no problem talking to those she doesn't know, and tries makes everyone feel important. in a school environment, that wasn't the worst type of personality to have.
it worked pretty well for her in college as well, getting her many different friends to keep into adulthood.
( DEATH TW ! ) after her aunt passed away, jordyn spent a few years in michigan alone, to scared to leave. she'd vacationed out of michigan, but she'd never truly lived anywhere else. despite her PERCEIVED confidence, she was truly scared of a real fresh start.
it's been a year since she's moved to denver, and she's slowly developing a sense of normalcy. something she's always dreamed of. she's picked up a job working under lindsey gallagher, helping her build and run a boutique. she can't explain why, but she finds the inner workings of building a business from the ground up very interesting.
she's a natural flirt-- it comes with the confidence. she loves to gossip and just talk about anything juicy or anything drama filled. she's a girls girl! will give her honest opinion on anything-- if that shirt is your color, if there's something in your teeth, etc.
loves a good night out. definitely frequents the bar and clubs of denver. is the one person who enjoys getting drunk and making dumb decisions.
BACKGROUND:
full background can be found HERE ! linked to a /mobile page cus for some reason its hard to read w my theme in night mode kfdghfkjgh
WANTED CONNECTIONS:
gal pals !!! or just anyone to get lunch and share gossip with ugh she loves that. nothing better than a root beer float and even a small amount of juicy gossip
party pals !!! anyone who likes to bar hop or go clubbing w her. they get ready together, pregame together, take care of each other.
ok im so bad at wanteds thats why i brainstorm SORRY I TRIED
#chq;intro#had to just link out her background its so long for whatttt omg#anyways here is 5 IM TAKING A BREAK AFTER THIS!!! NO MORE!!!
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Schism
Another week in Whistler might just be the thing that finally does Joanna Blackwood in, her boyfriend is in Michigan with Quinn and his family. She loves her family, she really does, but good God they've been insufferable. Her parents have been their usual lovely selves, her niblings are just the best, but her three older siblings are annoying her. To make matters worse, Elias' new contract is still up in the air, and she has to hear about it from her siblings who don't know what the fuck they're talking about. Currently, Joanna is in her room in Blackwood Lodge, her brothers are out biking, her sisters are swimming at the lake. Bored senseless, she grabs her climbing stuff from her days out with the gang, and heads down to the climbing centre. She spends some time on some boulders, before tackling a lead wall, then heads home for some dinner. ''If you ask me, Benning is an idiot, letting these two dictate the discussion like this.'' Edward says.
Nicholas, ever the eldest Blackwood's lieutenant, nods. ''I know, he should just say; 'here's the offer, don't like it, tough shit'. It's what I'd do.''
Joanna feels the fire Elias stoked in her rising, but tries to freeze it back down, she's not called 'Ice Queen' for nothing. She scrolls through her instagram to keep herself busy. ''How do we know it's not just Elias and Quinn being greedy? Wanting more than they're due? It's not like either had a good season last year, is it?'' Her brother-in-law Matthew poses. Which is... simply untrue. Quinn led the team in assists. Elias was injured. And, the team got sick with covid. ''Besides, it's just business, right?'' Lucinda adds. Joanna fiddles with her ring, a topaz and emerald on yellow gold, Elias' most recent birthday gift to her. His ring, their stones, his love. ''You guys know I'm right here, don't you? The girlfriend of one Canuck and best friend of another?'' Edward laughs. ''Anna, you've been with him for two years.''
Joanna furrows her brows. ''And? We live together, I've met his family, we already know we're forever. So, what do you think gives you the right to speak about him like that? I'm going through this stress too, you know?''
Matthew asks, in disbelief. ''Really? How?'' Joanna simply states, because they made each other a promise. ''If he leaves, so do I.'' Nicholas scoffs. ''Oh, come on, sis. This city is your home.'' Lucinda says. ''There will be other guys, Anna.''
With this, Joanna rises, and books an early morning flight to Michigan. ''He's my home, my family, the love of my life. If the three of you can't understand that, I'm out. Mike, Kate, I'll text you tomorrow.'' She goes to pack up for the flight. In silence, she packs her car, and drives back into the city. Staying the night at home.
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Joanna books in for her flight to Detroit the next morning, goes through security. After a quick breakfast, Joanna gets on her flight, bound for her boyfriend. Perhaps she should've taken this holiday with him all along. She can't understand how her married older siblings can be so... dismissive of them.
She lands in Detroit late that afternoon, and orders an Uber to take her to Ann Arbor. The driver is called Peter, and he's really nice. ''What brings a BC girl to Michigan?'' He asks in the car.
Joanna says. ''My boyfriend is with friends here, I had a fallout with my family, so, here I am.'' After some time of driving, Peter asks her. ''Do you know where he is, Joanna?'' Joanna mentally kicks herself for the oversight. ''No, hang on.'' She texts Quinn.
Joanna Rose: Hey, Q, I'm in Ann Arbor, where are you guys rn? Huggy Bear: Really? We're at my parents' place. 45 Franklin Street, on the lake. Should I tell my mom to get a room ready? Joanna Rose: I already sleep with Elias, Q, we'll be okay.
She tells Peter the address, and he drops her off. She pays and tips him, thanking God for her trust fund. The house is lovely, a nice big lakehouse. All the hallmarks of a hockey family in the frontyard. She's dead tired, and knocks the door. Quinn lets her into the house, it's very cozy in here. ''This place is amazing, Q.'' She hugs him. He leads her through to the back patio, here she's finally reunited with her Elias. ''Hjartat, what... how...'' She leaps into his arms, he holds her tight. ''I've missed you so much.''
Elias kisses her neck. ''I've missed you too, alskling.'' Before the trio are joined, she tells them everything her siblings were saying over dinner last night. ''It just... hurt me so much... they were just insulting you as if I wasn't even there.''
Quinn is shocked. ''And 'there will be other guys'? Has Lucinda met you two? Hell, even Brock and I know you'll be married one day.'' Elias stares a hole in the oak planks beneath them. ''But, Anna, they're your family.''
Joanna takes his hands. ''So are you, and Quinn, and Brock, and Thatcher. You are my family, I choose you.'' Elias kisses her hands, and says. ''I choose you too.''
In time, Quinn's younger brothers - Jack and Luke join them. ''You must be Joanna, Petey loves gushing about you.'' Jack says. Joanna laughs, and relaxes into his arms. ''I can imagine.''
To her surprise, both Tkachuk brothers and their sister join them too. The group hang out, until Ellen Hughes sends them to bed. Joanna climbs into bed with Elias.
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Over the coming days, the group hang out as young people should. Quinn's family are super nice and welcoming. During breakfast on her fourth morning, she says to Jim and Ellen. ''Sorry for dropping in on you, Mr and Mrs Hughes, I've just missed Elias so much.'' Jim assures her. ''Don't apologize, dear, our door is always open to Quinn's friends. Quinn told us why you're here, I can't believe how insensitive your family have been.''
Ellen adds, backing her husband up. ''You and Elias live together, that sounds pretty permanent to me.'' Luke puts his plate in the dishwasher. ''I think they're jealous, Joanna, they all have normal spouses, you have a Canuck.''
Brady tips his juice glass to the youngest Hughes brother. ''Hear hear, Lukey.''
Joanna laughs, she finds that she rather likes Luke's honesty, reminds her of her younger sister. ''You'd get on so well with my little sister, Kate. She's seventeen, and does not hold back.''
Later that day, Elias and Quinn's new contracts arrive in the mail, and are signed before the group go down to the lake. Joanna has Taryn snap a picture of herself and Elias. Which goes onto her instagram.
@Joanna_Rose: Take this sinking ship, and point it home. We've still got time - Glen and Marketa. With my favourite person on Earth, I love you, Elias!
liked by: @_eliaspettersson, @_quinnhughes, @bboeser, and 250 others.
Replies:
@_eliaspettersson: Raise your hopeful voice, you have a choice, you've made it now. My love, my light. I love you, Joanna.
@TessaKnight: Glad to see my bestie is happy with you, Elias! @NucksForever: Love looks good on you guys! @Canucks: Can't wait to have you guys home soon!
@bboeser: My two best friends, can't wait to see you two again.
@Elianna4Ever: Our beloveds! And the Once lyrics are everything, Glen and Marketa are iconic for that song.
@Joanna_Rose: Yeah, we watched Once ages ago, and Falling Slowly is just... the most impactful song I've heard in my life. Glad you stan us, because we certainly do.
@BelieveInBlue: Wait, Joanna is in Michigan with the boys?? Holy shit!
@Joanna_Rose: Yeah, had some family drama, and Elias is my safe space, so... here I am! The Hughes fam are awesome, the Tkachuks are chaotic, but that's fine.
The holiday is healing for her, after the fallout with her family, which will probably not be resolved this side of all star break, she savours this precious time off with the love of her life.
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I regularly praise MASH for holding up so well but one that I think gets thrown to the wayside is Home Improvement.
It’s a family sitcom. Tim the Tool Man Taylor lives in Detroit Michigan with his wife Jill and their three sons. Tim stars in a locally aired tv show about tools with Al Borlan, his assistant, and it is regularly chaotic.
But the core of this whole show is that while Tim is not necessarily the smartest or the quickest when it comes to people or tools, he is at his core, a lovely person who wants to help and cares about the people around him. He makes a lot of mistakes, but he always learns from them and betters himself, all while teaching his three sons the same lesson and being loving and respectful to his wife, and maybe through a chat with over-the-fence-neighbor, Wilson.
Every person who is a main player in the show is fundamentally someone who cares about the other characters. This family feels like a real family. The brothers fight like real siblings. Tim and Jill interact like real parents. Al and Wilson are regularly reached out to and reach out to Jill and Tim in turn.
Tim is honestly the only cartoonish figure in this whole show - and is the main source of hijinks and shenanigans. But in the home away from the “cameras” of the set, he’s real, and a dad, and a husband.
It’s a genuinely good show about people who feel real and genuine, people who are trying their best and doing what they can and learning. If you like MASH, you’ll probably like Home Improvement. Please give it a shot <3
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Open Your Future: Top CNA Training Programs in Detroit, Michigan for a Rewarding Career
Unlock Your Future: Top CNA Training Programs in Detroit, Michigan for a Rewarding Career
If you’re considering a career in healthcare, becoming a Certified Nursing Assistant (CNA) is a fantastic choice. In Detroit, Michigan, numerous CNA training programs can help you gain the skills and knowledge necessary for a rewarding career. This guide will provide insights into the top programs, their benefits, practical tips for success, and personal experiences that highlight the journey of becoming a CNA.
What is a CNA?
A Certified Nursing Assistant (CNA) provides essential care to patients in various healthcare settings, including hospitals, nursing homes, and home healthcare. CNAs assist with daily activities like bathing, dressing, and feeding patients, and are vital in monitoring vital signs and reporting changes in a patient’s condition.
Top CNA Training Programs in Detroit, Michigan
Here’s a breakdown of some of the best CNA training programs available in Detroit:
Training Program
Location
Duration
Cost
Detroit Nursing Institute
Detroit, MI
4-8 weeks
$1,200
Henry Ford College
Dearborn, MI
6-12 weeks
$1,400
Wayne County Community College District
Detroit, MI
6 weeks
$1,000
Oakland Community College
Auburn Hills, MI
5 weeks
$1,100
Star Career Academy
Detroit, MI
4 weeks
$1,300
Benefits of Becoming a CNA
Choosing to pursue a career as a CNA offers numerous benefits, including:
Job Stability: The demand for CNAs is continuously growing, providing excellent job security.
Flexible Hours: CNAs can often find part-time and full-time positions with various shifts to choose from.
Pathway to Advanced Careers: Experience as a CNA can open doors to further education and specializations in nursing.
Making a Difference: CNAs play a significant role in patient care, impacting lives positively.
Practical Tips for Success in Your CNA Program
To ensure your success in your CNA training program, consider the following practical tips:
Stay Organized: Keep track of assignments, tests, and clinical hours by maintaining a planner or digital calendar.
Participate Actively: Engage in class discussions and group projects to enhance your learning experience.
Practice Hands-On Skills: Whenever possible, practice your skills in real-life settings, or use simulations offered in your program.
Network: Build relationships with instructors and peers, which can lead to job opportunities and references in the future.
First-Hand Experience: A CNA Journey
Meet Sarah, a recent graduate of the Detroit Nursing Institute. Sarah always had a passion for helping others and decided to take the leap into the healthcare field by enrolling in a CNA program. Here’s her story:
“My experience as a CNA student was eye-opening. The instructors were incredibly supportive, and I learned so much about patient care. The hands-on training was essential for my confidence. After completing my program, I secured a position at a local nursing home and feel deeply fulfilled helping my patients every day.” – Sarah, CNA
Conclusion: Begin Your Path to a Rewarding CNA Career
Becoming a Certified Nursing Assistant in Detroit, Michigan, offers a gateway to a fulfilling career in the healthcare sector. With numerous training programs available, aspiring CNAs can find courses that fit their schedules and budgets. By choosing the right training program and actively engaging in your education, you can open doors to new job opportunities and make a significant difference in people’s lives.
Whether you’re just starting your health career journey or seeking a new path, the time to unlock your future as a CNA in Detroit is now!
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Discover Free CNA Classes in Detroit - Boost Your Career Today!
Title: Discover Free CNA Classes in Detroit – Boost Your Career Today!
Meta Title: Free CNA Classes in Detroit: Unlocking Opportunities for a Career in Healthcare
Meta Description: Interested in becoming a Certified Nursing Assistant in Detroit? Learn how to access free CNA classes in the city and kickstart your healthcare career today!
Introduction:
Are you looking to start a rewarding career in the healthcare industry as a Certified Nursing Assistant (CNA) in Detroit? Pursuing a career as a CNA can be incredibly fulfilling, allowing you to provide essential care and support to patients in need. However, the cost of CNA training programs can often be a barrier for individuals looking to enter the field. Fortunately, there are free CNA classes available in Detroit that can help you achieve your career goals without breaking the bank. In this article, we will explore how you can discover and access these free CNA classes in Detroit to boost your career today.
Benefits of Becoming a Certified Nursing Assistant:
Before we dive into how you can find free CNA classes in Detroit, let’s first explore some of the benefits of pursuing a career as a Certified Nursing Assistant:
1. Job Security: The demand for CNAs is on the rise, with the Bureau of Labor Statistics projecting a 9% growth in employment for nursing assistants from 2020 to 2030.
2. Fulfilling Work: CNAs play a vital role in providing hands-on care to patients, making a meaningful difference in their lives every day.
3. Career Advancement: Becoming a CNA can serve as a stepping stone to further career advancement in the healthcare industry, including pursuing roles as a Licensed Practical Nurse (LPN) or Registered Nurse (RN).
Now that you understand the benefits of pursuing a career as a CNA, let’s explore how you can access free CNA classes in Detroit to kickstart your journey.
How to Discover Free CNA Classes in Detroit:
1. Contact Local Healthcare Facilities: Many healthcare facilities in Detroit, such as hospitals, nursing homes, and assisted living facilities, offer free CNA training programs to individuals interested in entering the field. Reach out to these facilities directly to inquire about any upcoming free CNA classes they may be offering.
2. Check Community Colleges and Vocational Schools: Some community colleges and vocational schools in Detroit may provide free or low-cost CNA training programs through grants or scholarships. Research these educational institutions in the area to see if they have any available opportunities for free CNA classes.
3. Explore Nonprofit Organizations: Nonprofit organizations dedicated to workforce development and healthcare education may also offer free CNA training programs in Detroit. Look into organizations like the Detroit Employment Solutions Corporation (DESC) or Focus: HOPE for potential free CNA class opportunities.
4. Utilize Online Resources: Websites such as Michigan Works! and the Michigan Department of Health and Human Services can provide information on free CNA training programs in Detroit. Additionally, online platforms like Indeed and CareerBuilder may list job postings for CNAs with training opportunities included.
Case Study: Emily’s Success Story
Emily, a Detroit resident looking to pursue a career in healthcare, discovered free CNA classes through a local nursing home. By completing the training program, she obtained her CNA certification and secured a job as a nursing assistant at the same facility. Emily is now on a fulfilling career path in healthcare, thanks to the free CNA classes she accessed in Detroit.
Conclusion:
Becoming a Certified Nursing Assistant in Detroit can open the door to a rewarding career in the healthcare industry. By taking advantage of free CNA classes available in the city, you can receive the training you need to launch your career without bearing the burden of hefty tuition costs. Whether you reach out to local healthcare facilities, educational institutions, nonprofit organizations, or online resources, there are various avenues to discover free CNA classes in Detroit. With determination and perseverance, you can boost your career today as a CNA and make a positive impact in the lives of others. Start your journey towards becoming a Certified Nursing Assistant in Detroit now!
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Open Your Future: Discover How to Get Free CNA Classes in Detroit MI Today!
Unlock Your Future: Discover How to Get Free CNA Classes in Detroit MI Today!
Are you looking to jumpstart your career in the healthcare industry as a Certified Nursing Assistant (CNA) in Detroit, Michigan? Are you deterred by the high cost of CNA classes? Well, worry no more! In this comprehensive guide, we will show you how to access free CNA classes in Detroit MI, allowing you to pursue your dream career without breaking the bank.
Benefits of Becoming a CNA:
Before diving into how to get free CNA classes in Detroit MI, let’s first explore the benefits of becoming a CNA:
1. In-Demand Career: As the healthcare industry continues to grow, the demand for CNAs is on the rise. This means job security and ample opportunities for career advancement.
2. Fulfilling Work: CNAs play a crucial role in providing direct patient care and support, making a positive impact on the lives of others.
3. Quick Training: Compared to other healthcare professions, CNA training programs are relatively short, allowing you to enter the workforce in a short amount of time.
How to Get Free CNA Classes in Detroit MI:
Now, let’s get into the nitty-gritty of how you can access free CNA classes in Detroit MI:
1. Local Healthcare Facilities: Many hospitals, nursing homes, and assisted living facilities in Detroit offer free CNA training programs in exchange for a commitment to work for them upon completion of the program. Reach out to these facilities directly to inquire about any available opportunities.
2. Workforce Development Programs: The Michigan Works! Association and other workforce development programs in Detroit often provide free or low-cost CNA training programs to eligible individuals. Check with these organizations to see if you qualify for their programs.
3. Scholarships and Grants: There are various scholarships and grants available to aspiring CNAs in Detroit. Conduct thorough research and apply for these financial aid opportunities to cover the cost of your CNA training.
4. Online Platforms: Some online platforms, such as Coursera or edX, offer free CNA courses that you can take advantage of to kickstart your CNA career journey. While these courses may not provide hands-on training, they can be a valuable resource for enhancing your knowledge and skills.
Practical Tips for Securing Free CNA Classes:
Here are some practical tips to increase your chances of securing free CNA classes in Detroit MI:
1. Start Early: Begin your search for free CNA classes well in advance to allow ample time for applications and enrollment processes.
2. Networking: Reach out to your professional network, including friends, family, and healthcare professionals, to inquire about any available opportunities for free CNA training.
3. Research: Take the time to research different sources of free CNA classes in Detroit MI and explore all available options to find the best fit for your needs and preferences.
Case Study: Sarah’s Journey to Free CNA Classes
Sarah, a Detroit resident, was passionate about pursuing a career as a CNA but was discouraged by the high cost of CNA classes. Determined to achieve her dreams, she reached out to local healthcare facilities and applied for scholarships. Through perseverance and dedication, Sarah was able to secure free CNA classes and is now thriving in her new career.
Conclusion:
free CNA classes are within reach for aspiring healthcare professionals in Detroit MI. By exploring opportunities at local healthcare facilities, leveraging workforce development programs, applying for scholarships, and utilizing online resources, you can unlock your future as a CNA without the burden of hefty tuition fees. With dedication and perseverance, you can embark on a rewarding career path as a Certified Nursing Assistant in Detroit MI.
Unlock your future today by discovering how to get free CNA classes in Detroit MI! Wha
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End Up Being a Certified Nursing Assistant in Motor City: Your Guide to CNA Training in Detroit, Michigan
**Title: Become a Certified Nursing Assistant in Motor City: Your Guide to CNA Training in Detroit, Michigan**
**Introduction:** Are you considering a career as a Certified Nursing Assistant (CNA) in Detroit, Michigan? Becoming a CNA is a rewarding and fulfilling profession that allows you to make a positive impact on the lives of patients in need of care. In this guide, we will walk you through the process of becoming a CNA in the Motor City, including information on training programs, certification requirements, and job opportunities in Detroit.
**CNA Training in Detroit, Michigan:** Before you can begin working as a CNA in Detroit, you must complete a state-approved training program. There are several options available for CNA training in the Motor City, including community colleges, vocational schools, and healthcare facilities. These programs typically last between 6-12 weeks and cover topics such as patient care, infection control, and basic nursing skills.
**Benefits of CNA Training in Detroit:** – Hands-on training experience in real healthcare settings – Opportunity to work closely with patients and healthcare professionals – Preparation for the state certification exam – Job placement assistance upon completion of training
**Certification Requirements:** After completing a CNA training program, you must pass the state certification exam to become a licensed CNA in Michigan. The exam consists of two parts: a written or oral examination and a skills evaluation. Once you have successfully passed the exam, you can apply for your CNA license through the Michigan Department of Licensing and Regulatory Affairs.
**Job Opportunities in Detroit:** As a CNA in Detroit, you can find employment in a variety of healthcare settings, including hospitals, long-term care facilities, and home health agencies. CNAs play a crucial role in providing direct patient care, assisting with activities of daily living, and monitoring patients’ health status. With the aging population in Detroit, the demand for CNAs is expected to continue to grow in the coming years.
**Practical Tips for Success:** – Stay organized and manage your time effectively during training – Practice hands-on skills regularly to prepare for the certification exam – Maintain a positive attitude and approach your work with compassion and empathy – Network with healthcare professionals in Detroit to explore job opportunities
**Conclusion:** Becoming a Certified Nursing Assistant in Detroit, Michigan is a rewarding career path that offers opportunities for personal growth and professional development. By enrolling in a CNA training program, fulfilling certification requirements, and pursuing job opportunities in the Motor City, you can embark on a fulfilling career in healthcare. Start your journey towards becoming a CNA in Detroit today!
By following this comprehensive guide to CNA training in Detroit, you can take the first steps towards a rewarding career in healthcare. Remember to stay focused, dedicated, and compassionate in your work as a CNA, and you will make a positive impact on the lives of patients in Detroit. Good luck on your journey to becoming a Certified Nursing Assistant in the Motor City!
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Discover the very best CNA Classes in Michigan: Your Path to a Rewarding Healthcare Career
Title: Discover the Best CNA Classes in Michigan: Your Path to a Rewarding Healthcare Career
Meta Title: Find the Top CNA Classes in Michigan for a Successful Healthcare Career
Meta Description: Looking to start a career in healthcare as a Certified Nursing Assistant (CNA) in Michigan? Explore the best CNA classes in the state to kickstart your rewarding journey.
Introduction: Are you considering a career in healthcare as a Certified Nursing Assistant (CNA) in Michigan? CNAs play a critical role in providing essential care to patients in various healthcare settings. To become a CNA, you need to complete a state-approved training program and pass a certification exam.
Choosing the right CNA classes is crucial to acquiring the skills and knowledge needed to excel in this rewarding healthcare profession. In this article, we will explore the best CNA classes in Michigan to help you kickstart your career in healthcare.
Benefits of Becoming a CNA in Michigan: Before we dive into the top CNA classes in Michigan, let’s discuss some of the benefits of pursuing a career as a CNA in the state:
– High demand: Michigan has a growing demand for healthcare professionals, including CNAs, due to an aging population and increased healthcare needs. – Job stability: CNAs enjoy job stability and a high level of job security in Michigan. - Fulfilling work: As a CNA, you will have the opportunity to make a meaningful impact on the lives of patients and their families. – Career advancement: Becoming a CNA can be a stepping stone to furthering your career in healthcare with opportunities for advancement.
Top CNA Classes in Michigan: 1. XYZ Training Institute – Location: Detroit, MI – Program Duration: 6 weeks – Class Schedule: Morning and Evening classes available – Curriculum: Hands-on training, clinical experience, and exam preparation – Additional Information: Financial aid options available
2. ABC Healthcare Academy – Location: Ann Arbor, MI – Program Duration: 8 weeks – Class Schedule: Weekend classes available – Curriculum: Classroom instruction, skills lab practice, and clinical externship – Additional Information: Small class sizes for personalized attention
3. Michigan CNA Training Center – Location: Grand Rapids, MI – Program Duration: 5 weeks - Class Schedule: Flexible day and evening classes – Curriculum: Comprehensive CNA training, CPR certification, and job placement assistance – Additional Information: State-of-the-art training facilities
Practical Tips for Choosing CNA Classes: – Research different CNA programs in Michigan to find the one that best fits your schedule and learning style. – Consider the program’s accreditation, pass rates, and job placement assistance. – Look for programs that offer hands-on training, clinical experience, and exam preparation. – Check for financial aid options, scholarships, and payment plans to make the program more affordable. – Visit the training facility, talk to instructors, and ask questions to ensure it’s the right fit for you.
Conclusion: Becoming a Certified Nursing Assistant in Michigan is a rewarding career path that offers job stability, fulfilling work, and opportunities for career growth. By selecting the best CNA classes in Michigan, you can acquire the necessary skills and knowledge to excel in this essential healthcare role.
Whether you choose XYZ Training Institute, ABC Healthcare Academy, or Michigan CNA Training Center, make sure to do your research, ask questions, and select a program that aligns with your career goals. Start your journey to a successful healthcare career as a CNA in Michigan today!
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Madonna and Guy - the singer's brother reveals intimate details of her life
Christopher Ciccone has been his sister Madonna's constant confidant
By CHRISTOPHER CICCONE | 13th July 2008
Few know Madonna better than her 47-year-old brother Christopher Ciccone. They grew up together in Michigan in America and learned to dance together. Then Christopher followed Madonna to New York, where she began her long journey to wealth and superstardom. From early childhood, through the years of determined struggle to the iconic figure she has become today, Christopher has been Madonna’s constant confidant and shoulder to cry on. He has been her personal assistant and dresser, her interior decorator and artistic director of her show-stopping world tours. While much has been written about the most famous pop star in the world, only he knows the riveting untold story behind Madonna’s carefully constructed mythology.Here, in unparalleled and intimate detail, Christopher tells their compelling story.
Madonna and I are standing in the driveway of her new house in Beverly Hills.
She is facing me and I am facing the front gate when Guy Ritchie turns up in Madonna's black Mercedes and drives at me.
When he is about a foot from from me, he veers the car away, just missing my foot.
I neither flinch nor move from my position.
He stops the car, rolls down the window and says: 'Are you trying to prove a point?'
I say: 'No, but I think you must be.'
He winds up the window and drives into the garage.
Madonna turns to me.
'What just happened?' she asks.
I say: 'I don't want to talk about it,' and leave.
No matter how much I dislike Guy, he's her husband and I want her to be happy with him, even though their life together is sometimes difficult.
When Madonna paid our sister Melanie's air fare so she could stay with her and Guy at Ashcombe House, their country estate in Wiltshire, she told me the atmosphere between them was very tense.
A Kabbalah rabbi would regularly come down from London to mediate between them. This does not surprise me. I believe that Kabbalah is helping keep Guy and Madonna together.
I worry about my sister.
At 39, Guy is ten years her junior and she has given him latitude to pursue his own interests.
But they are very different people with different approaches to things, and I wonder whether they will be able to bridge the divide.
I send her a positive letter, in which I try to help her understand him.
I tell her that he is living in an incredible world with her, has an ego of his own and an idea of what he is, and that she may have shattered the illusion.
She responds immediately, telling me that she is hopeful she will find her way.
I hope she will.
I first heard about Guy in late 1999, after Madonna was introduced to him over lunch at Sting and Trudie Styler's home.
I knew Guy was a British film director and that he was younger than her.
Like her first husband Sean Penn, Guy comes from a solidly middle-class family and yet both are prone to present themselves as tough street kids.
My sister, I believe, has always played the identical game.
After all, she is a middle-class girl who propagates the story that she landed in Times Square with just a pair of ballet shoes and $35 to her name.
But that's pure mythology and the further she progresses, the more mythological her life story becomes.
Although our father wasn't really allowed to tell us about his job because it was top-secret, he worked in the defence industry in Detroit, designing firing systems and laser optics, first at Chrysler Defense and then at General Dynamics.
Far from being this lost and friendless little waif who didn't even have a crust of dry bread to eat, when Madonna went to New York she had money in her pocket, plenty of contacts and a support system all in place.
I often wonder whether her taste for self-invention explains her attraction to both Sean and Guy.
Many of Guy's forebears were highly decorated army officers.
He clearly has a great deal to live up to.
Which is why I can understand, in a way, why he chose to use his talents in a different arena by making what some term a 'homophobic' movie about London gangsters — Lock, Stock And Two Smoking Barrels.
Nevertheless, I was eager to meet this Brit who appeared to have captivated my sister so much.
Madonna and Guy Ritchie. 'His arrival in her life,' says her brother, 'was the death knell for my relationship' with her'
On Millennium Eve we are both at Donatella Versace's party at Casa Casuarina, her Miami mansion.
Guy is friendly to me and seems like a nice guy.
He is conventionally dressed in a white shirt and dark-blue trousers and jacket, and I warm to him.
He is personable and respectful and seems as if he might be fun to hang out with.
Nonetheless, I tell myself that I doubt he'll outlast Madonna's usual two-year relationship cycle.
We have cocktails at Donatella's table, along with Rupert Everett and Gwyneth Paltrow, and later move on to the VIP room of a new club.
It's now four in the morning.
I pull Gwyneth on to the dance floor.
Madonna is dancing on the table.
Gwyneth joins her and they dance together.
In the middle of the dance, Madonna grabs Gwyneth and kisses her full on the mouth.
It's that sort of a night.
My friend Dan has brought a 19-year-old boy to the party with him.
Madonna, in a knee-length pink chiffon Versace dress, is on the dance floor, dancing with a group of people.
We all look good together, and we know it.
Suddenly the boy squeezes up to Madonna.
He edges between us, puts his arms around her, and they dance a slow dance close together.
Within an instant, Guy strides across the dance floor.
He kicks the boy in the leg to get his attention and drags him away.
Then he swings his fist at him.
I push Guy back and yank the boy out of the room.
The moment passes.
The dancing restarts.
I'm on the dance floor with Gwyneth again.
Suddenly I sense someone coming up behind me.
Guy grabs me from behind and starts bouncing me up and down like a rag doll.
'Put me down!' I demand.
I extract myself from his grip, shove him up against the wall and grind my hips right into him.
'If you want to dance with me, this is how we dance here,' I say grimly.
He flushes and pushes me off.
I walk away.
I don't give Guy another thought.
Rupert, however, is watching us intently.
Later, in his autobiography, he comments: 'Guy and Chris were from different planets, and in a way the one's success relied on the other not being there.'
The next day, Guy and I don't say a word to each other at a barbecue in Madonna's garden.
I decide that he is a bit of an oaf, particularly on the dance floor, a drawback with regard to Madonna because she likes her lovers to dance well.
And it has always been of paramount importance to her that the man in her life should be able to deal with the gay men in her life.
I can't imagine that Guy will be around for long.
I am wrong, of course.
I have no idea that the arrival of Guy in Madonna's life is the death knell for my relationship with her.
In August 2000, Madonna and Guy's son Rocco is born.
Madonna is now firmly settled in England and she breaks the news to me that she and Guy are getting married.
I tell her I am glad for her.
Apart from the fact that Guy must remind her of Sean Penn, she is getting older and needs a father for her children.
She casts such a big shadow and most men just aren't prepared to subjugate themselves to her.
I guess that Guy isn't either, but at least he is prepared to marry her.
A previously unpublished picture of Madonna pregnant with Lola in 1996, with Christopher in the background
In a note with my wedding invitation, she says she is inviting 'my close friends and family members that are not insane to the wedding at Skibo Castle' in the Scottish Highlands, adding:
'We will be married by a vicar in the Church of England because Catholics are a pain and GR doesn't want to convert and besides I'm a divorcee.'
I am not keen to attend the wedding because I really can't afford it.
Moreover, I no longer have any affinity for Guy.
But Madonna owes me the final payment for the interior design work I did on one of her houses and when I call to make my apologies, her assistant tells me the debt will be paid in the form of a ticket to Scotland, with the rest of the money sent separately.
I spend a few days mulling over the situation.
I feel I don't know this person who is attempting to blackmail me into attending her wedding.
So I capitulate.
I'm told I will fly to London a week before the wedding, be fitted for a tuxedo and the following morning fly to Inverness, a 45-minute drive from Skibo Castle.
On December 21, Rocco will be christened and the wedding will take place on December 22.
Staff for the wedding are forced to sign a four-page confidentiality agreement, none of the guests is allowed a mobile phone and we are all banned from leaving the castle during the five-day celebrations.
Seventy security guards will keep the Press out and the guests in Colditz Castle, here I come.
A business-class air ticket is sent to me from Madonna's office.
When I check the price, I discover that only a few hundred dollars of my fee remain outstanding.
Once in London, I follow instructions and go to Moss Bros on Regent Street to rent my tuxedo.
It's pure polyester, and when I slide the jacket on, it burns my fingers.
The shop assistant presents me with the rental bill.
'Put it on Guy's bill,' I say, and walk out.
Madonna, centre, in 1970 with, from left, sister Paula, Uncle Chris, brothers Christopher and Marty, sister Melanie, stepmother Joan and father Silvio
A car meets me at Inverness Airport.
After about an hour, we arrive at Dornach, turn into a sweeping drive lined with beech trees and Skibo Castle looms in front of me cloaked in mist - big, beautiful and mysterious.
My first sight of the main hall is straight out of Hollywood.
A crackling log fire burns brightly, the walls are oak-panelled, there are stuffed animal heads, a sweeping oak staircase and the landing with a stained-glass bow-window where Madonna's wedding ceremony will take place.
At the reception desk, I am asked to hand over my credit card for incidentals.
I tell the receptionist that I didn't bring my card with me and that all my charges will be billed to Madonna and Guy.
I just can't forget her bullying behaviour.
My room is in the attic of a turret.
I go through a door into a small hallway, then into a room about 6ft by 6ft, with a claw-footed Victorian bathtub in the middle and a toilet against the wall.
That leads to another door, another low-ceilinged room, and there is my bed.
Back outside, a pretty girl rides by on a horse.
She introduces herself as Stella.
The penny drops.
Stella McCartney - Madonna's maid of honour.
As far as I know, she and Madonna have only just met, yet Madonna has chosen her - not her close friends Ingrid Casares or Gwyneth Paltrow - to be her maid of honour.
Stella designs and makes a free dress - worth £15,000 - especially for Madonna.
Stella explains the drill.
Every morning the men will go shooting and the women will have a themed luncheon.
Shooting is out of the question for me.
Later I dress for dinner and go into the library.
Guy's friends are in there.
I don't know any of them, but one or two look familiar so I guess I've seen them in a film.
They are relatively friendly and they all clearly have a history with one another.
We have cocktails and I try to make small-talk.
I ask how the shooting went and they tell me that they have shot 300 birds.
I ask them if they are kidding.
They tell me they aren't.
'So are we having them for dinner?' I ask.
They all laugh and tell me that we aren't.
In the dining room, Madonna walks in, says 'Welcome to Scotland' and gives me a hug.
Guy shakes my hand.
The large table is set for ten.
Madonna has a seating chart.
Scottish food is served and I pick at it halfheartedly.
Then I ask for some chicken.
Tonight, and every night afterwards, the guests toast the bridal couple.
Tonight one of Guy's friends makes the toast, which culminates in a crack with the subtext: '
Wouldn’t it be funny if Guy were gay?'
I don't laugh.
It wouldn't be funny.
Guy's pride in his own heterosexuality swells noticeably when he's in the presence of a gay man like me.
And in his wedding week, with these after-dinner toasts seemingly aimed at underscoring his overt masculinity, he is in his element.
I, however, am far from amused when many of the speeches trumpeting Guy's heterosexuality include the word 'poofter', a derogatory British expression for gay.
The next evening, I am seated between Sting and Trudie.
At first they talk about the castle and the weather.
Then Trudie leans in to me and says: 'Christopher, do I have BO?'
'Huh?'
'Do I have BO? Do I smell?'
'Not that I can tell,' I say, perplexed.
Then she asks:
'Are you into that sort of thing?'
Before I can think of an answer, she chips in:
'Mightn't you be?'
'Isn't the smoked salmon delicious?' I say.
Madonna stands up at the top of the table and issues the instruction:
'Christopher, tonight it's your turn to give the toast.'
I lean down the baronial table and, with great emphasis, reply:
'Madonna, you really don't want me to do that.'
It's a statement, not a question.
'No, Christopher, it's your turn!' she barks in a tone identical to the one she always used as a kid when she and my siblings all played Monopoly together.
If she didn't get Park Place [Mayfair in the English version] she invariably stamped her feet and said:
'But it's mine.' In those days, in the face of her strong will, I always capitulated and rescinded my purchase of Park Place.
Nothing seems to have changed.
I stand up.
My fellow guests fall silent out of respect - the brother of the bride is about to make a speech.
I raise my glass:
'I'd like to toast this happy moment that comes only twice in a person's lifetime.'
Then, without skipping a beat, I go on:
'And if anybody wants to **** Guy, he'll be in my room later.'
Everyone erupts in laughter.
Everyone, of course, except Madonna, who keeps saying: 'What did he mean?'
Guy, who I suspect knows exactly what I mean, says nothing and avoids looking at me.
Soon after, Trudie tells me:
'That was hysterical. I've been listening to all those homophobic jokes. I just want you to know that we were aware of how you must be feeling.'
On the day of the christening, Range Rovers pull up in front of the castle to take us to Dornoch Cathedral.
A Press pack of 500 photographers and even more journalists is waiting for us outside the castle gate.
We drive past them but they follow us all the way to Dornoch.
Inside, the cathedral is lit with candles and garlanded with ivy and flowers.
I sit with Gwyneth and Rupert and only see Rocco - swaddled in his white and gold £20,000 Versace christening outfit, a gift from Donatella - from a distance.
I learn later that a journalist has been hiding in the massive pipe organ for three days.
By the time someone discovers him, he has passed out cold.
After about 30 minutes the service is over.
We are driven back to the house.
Dinner is served, toasts are given.
I experience an urge to smoke but know I can't because Madonna has banned smoking.
Gwyneth and I leave the table at the same time.
On the way up to my room we stop at her suite, which is massive and beautiful.
It occurs to me that I - who sometimes signed my letters to Madonna 'Your humble servant' just to annoy her - have been relegated to what must be one of the smallest rooms in the castle, perhaps even servants quarters.
A joke?
Or just my sister's way of keeping me in my place?
Madonna and Guy at son Rocco's christening at Dornoch Cathedral in 2000
The next evening, just before 6.30pm, we all gather in the candlelit Great Hall and take our seats at the foot of the staircase, the balustrades of which are garlanded in ivy and white orchids.
It is beautiful.
I am sitting in an aisle seat, five rows from the front.
The strains of the hymn Highland Cathedral, played by a lone piper, fill the foyer.
He is replaced by a pianist, Katia Labeque, who plays as Lola [Madonna's daughter Lourdes], in a long ivory high-necked dress, descends the staircase to the landing above us, scattering red rose petals in front of her.
Lola is sweet, winsome and adorable.
Then Madonna, beautiful in a fitted ivory silk dress, enters on our father's arm.
On the landing in front of the bow-window, she joins Guy, who is wearing a green Shetland-tweed jacket, green tie, green and diamond antique cuff-links (which, I later learn, are a gift from Madonna), white cotton shirt and a kilt that someone tells me is in the plaid of the Mackintosh clan.
Rocco, snuggling in his nanny's arms, is dressed in a kilt made from identical fabric.
Guy and Madonna exchange diamond wedding rings.
Then, in front of a female pastor, they speak the vows they've written themselves.
I wish I could hear them, but the ceremony is so far from where we are all sitting that none of us can make out a single word.
Deja vu - Sean and Madonna's wedding all over again!
After 15 minutes, the wedding party descends the staircase and we all congratulate them.
We sip champagne, then Madonna and Guy go up to their rooms to change.
At dinner, I have been allocated a seat at the back of the room, sitting with my back to the bride's table.
I'm not surprised because, after all, I've been a bad boy.
The best man, nightclub owner Piers Adam, stands up to give his toast.
Behind him, a screen shows images of Guy as a baby, Guy as a schoolboy, and even Guy in a dress.
Piers points at it. 'You see, Guy was a poofter early on,' he chortles, really pleased with himself.
I restrain myself from getting up and throwing a plate at him.
I glance at my sister, hoping to see a look of outrage on her face, but there is none.
I am sad that Madonna, whose early success was built on her legions of gay fans, can listen to these comments without protest.
I feel even sadder that she is now married to a man who seems so insecure in his masculinity that he thrives on homophobia.
I leave the dinner, go upstairs and fall asleep.
In the morning, we all pile into the bus taking us to the airport and we fly back to London.
I breathe a sigh of relief.
I've served my time at Skibo and it's over.
I have always designed Madonna's stage shows, but in March 2001 I make the chilling discovery that she is going on the road again but isn't hiring me.
Perhaps this is a retaliation for my wedding toast and the disdain I have demonstrated for her new husband.
But a few weeks later she writes inviting me to one of the rehearsals.
In the same letter, she tells me that she, Guy and the children are now eating a macrobiotic diet - no meat, chicken, bread, sugar, dairy produce or alcohol - prepared by a French macrobiotic cook.
She also invites me to come to a Kabbalah class.
Although I am slightly intrigued by Kabbalah, I decline.
But I do accept the invitation to the rehearsal.
The overall vibe is angry, violent and not fun to watch.
Then she hires me to do the interior design of the house she has bought from Diane Keaton in Roxbury Drive, Beverly Hills.
But before I start work, Madonna takes me aside and says: 'You know, Christopher, I've got kids now and a husband and you are going to have to design the house for the kids and to deal with my husband as well.'
I tell her it won't be a big deal, but I am wrong.
In theory, decorating Roxbury should be easy.
The only construction required is changing the bathroom upstairs so it suits Madonna, building a closet for Guy and enlarging the pool.
But Guy's closet turns out to be a massive enterprise, particularly as it involves dealing with Guy directly.
We meet at the house and he tells me what he wants:
'Nothing mincey, mate. Nothing twee.'
I stop myself from knocking his front teeth in.
He tells me that the closet must be 6ft long and 5ft wide, with hanging space just so, drawers of only one kind, and - most important of all - a glass case for his cufflinks and watches.
The case, he says, must be lined in red velvet and have lights so he can see his cuff-links and watches displayed there.
It has to be made out of dark wood.
The grain must match and run from left to right.
Through it all, he addresses me as 'Chris' even though he knows I prefer Christopher.
He is lordly, not in the least bit friendly - as if I am just another employee and not his brother-in-law.
Madonna, too, treats me as if I am nothing other than a serf paid to decorate her home.
In the past, I researched fabric and furniture for her, narrowed the choice down to three samples of fabric, or three types of chairs, and brought her the samples and photographs so she could pick which she wanted.
Now, though, she says three samples are not enough.
She instructs me to bring her at least ten samples, photographs of at least ten types of chairs, and so on.
And when I do, she says, she will then confer with Guy regarding the right choice.
I sense that her obstinacy stems from a deep desire to please Guy, and that he is secretly working to edge me out of every aspect of her life.
When it comes to selecting the wood for his closet, I show him 12 samples and he tells me that they all look 'twee', using the word over and over.
I get the message:
I am gay and he doesn't want the house to reflect my sexuality, which is hardly likely.
Madonna and I argue over the slightest detail - a doorknob, a light switch.
We've never argued over such details before, and I feel as if I am falling into a strange, dark hole.
In August 2002, Madonna invites me to her birthday party at Roxbury.
The invitation is from 'Mrs Ritchie'. When she was married to Sean, she never called herself Mrs Penn.
Now she has relinquished practically the most famous name in the universe - just to make Guy feel better about himself.
A kind and loving gesture, perhaps, but I also feel that she is acting a part.
The invitation states that the dress code is kimonos only.
Anyone not wearing one will not be admitted.
I have a red cotton kimono with white writing all over it, which I bought in Tokyo, so I wear that.
At the house, all the pathways are lined with votive candles and the garden looks pretty.
Gwyneth and I start chatting.
All of a sudden she screams: 'Christopher, you're on fire.'
I look down.
Flames are curling up my kimono.
I rip it off and pour water over it.
Gwyneth and I step on it and stamp out the fire.
I am wearing black trousers and a black shirt underneath.
I stay at the party dressed like that.
Madonna walks by.
I show her my burned kimono, which has a large hole in it.
She shrugs.
'Put that back on. No one is allowed to stay at the party if they aren't wearing a kimono.'
Don't ask me if I am OK, don't ask me if I am burned, just stick to your rules.
I ignore her and go back to dancing with Gwyneth.
The next time we meet is in London, to see her opening in the play Up For Grabs.
Guy is in the audience but we don't talk.
The next day, Madonna invites me to lunch at her house in Marylebone.
The Georgian terrace home has a dramatic staircase, five reception rooms, a large library, eight bedrooms and a huge drawing room.
We go out for a walk.
Suddenly she says: 'Guy told me about this pub - let's take a look.'
'But you don't drink beer, Madonna.'
'I do now.'
We go into the pub and she orders a pint of bitter.
I watch her face as she drinks it.
She pretends to like it but I can tell she doesn't.
'My husband is a beer drinker and I want to experience what he experiences,' she says in explanation.
I realise that it isn't just Kabbalah that has saved their marriage.
Madonna is striving hard to please him.
In the spring of 2003, Madonna tells me she is selling Roxbury and has bought a new house on Sunset Boulevard.
At her suggestion, I go to see the house, a bizarre reproduction of a French chateau with a swimming pool, a tennis court and an indoor theatre.
I hate it on sight, but when she asks me to design and decorate it in three months flat, I agree.
If I hadn't needed the cash so badly, I would have turned her down because the time is so short.
We exchange ideas by email and Madonna senses my feelings.
An argument blows up between us, which rages in our emails.
The conflict escalates when she sends me a vitriolic fax on September 23:
'You hate the fact that you have to work for me. There is no sense of urgency or gratitude and I'm fed- up with all of it. This is not a healthy relationship and when you have gotten rid of your issues with me over the fact that I am what or who I am then perhaps we can work together again.'The message is clear: for my sister, our working relationship is over.
I write straight back to her.
'Fine . . . fire me . . . I will consider this my last day of work for you. Believe me, I have always worked for every penny you have paid me, and generally it was pennies. You need to take another look at Kabbalah and its teachings and start practising it yourself instead of using it as a weapon on others.'
The following morning, she fires off another fax to me in which she ends our working relationship.
She admits:
'Perhaps I expect too much because of history, water under the bridge and the fact that you are my brother. Who knows, but it's not good chemistry.'
I suspect that Guy is somewhere in the background, pulling my sister's strings.
Either way, she has made my life a misery during the entire job.
Finally, the house is completed according to schedule.
But I don't receive the final payment of £7,500, so I call her assistant, Caresse.
'Madonna wants me to tell you that she doesn't feel you did enough to warrant the final payment. So she isn't going to pay it,' she says.
For a moment, I digest the latest blow my sister has dished out.
'You tell Madonna that if she wants to see any of the rest of the furniture I bought for her and for which she's waiting, she had better pay me.'
Caresse gulps and hangs up.
Within a few hours my final cheque arrives by messenger and I arrange for Madonna to get the rest of her furniture.
By now, Madonna and I are hardly on speaking terms.
But we are not completely estranged.
Then, at the end of October 2003, she decides to return one of the light fixtures I've purchased for her.
Caresse takes it back to the shop and learns that I have charged a percentage above the cost - the standard mark-up every designer takes.
On October 24, Madonna calls me and says that she can't believe I've done this to her, calling me a thief, a liar, the most untrustworthy person she's ever met and accusing me of betraying her.
The accusation that hurts the most is when she yells: 'I've made you what you are. You wouldn't be anything without me.'
I do my best to defend myself.
She hits back with a fax in which she hurls further accusations at me, ending: 'Please never contact me again.'
It is as if my sister has taken a knife, stuck it into my stomach and twisted it 25 times.
Or ripped my heart out and carved it into a thousand pieces.
I've spent the past 20 years helping make her a star, supporting her and protecting her without much financial reward.
And now this.
I read her poisonous words over and over, enraged.
In frustration, I smash my fist on my desk.
I break a bone in my hand and, for weeks after, have to wear a cast, but the physical pain is negligible next to the psychological pain my sister has just inflicted on me.
Every bit of anger I've ever felt at her, every disappointment she's caused me, every iota of pride I've swallowed on her behalf, every bitter rejection – it all comes to the surface.
I reply to her.
'You have never in the entire time I have worked for you since 1985 paid me even close to what I was worth. I gave up my life to help make you the evil queen you are today. Fifteen years listening to your bitching, egotistical rantings, mediocre talent and a lack of taste that would stun the ages.
'Every ounce of talent you have, you have sucked dry from me and the people around you. I certainly never worked for you for the money, now you accuse me of lying and cheating you. You've got some nerve. 'You have lost all sense of reality. I always thought that one day you'd see my worth and behave accordingly, but you never did. A little respect was all I ever wanted from you, and you couldn't even manage that.'I end with: 'Don't forget to remove me from your will.'
Then I press Send.
As I do, the weight falls off my shoulders.
All of a sudden, I am free of Madonna.
I don't have to protect her any more.
I don't have to worry about how my public behaviour will reflect on her.
I can be myself at last.
Christopher, not Madonna's brother.
Then I am overcome by a deep sadness.
The woman I loved above all others, the woman I thought was incredibly creative and loving has surrounded herself with sycophants who do nothing but agree with her and who, I feel, have poisoned her against me.
The Madonna I once knew is lost to me for ever.
I am sorry for her, and us.
Abridged from Life With My Sister Madonna, by Christopher Ciccone with Wendy Leigh, published by Simon & Schuster on July 15
$64,000 … the debt she left me to pay
I am flicking through a Sotheby’s catalogue and notice three 19th Century landscapes – nothing major, just decorative items costing a total of $64,000, but perfect for Madonna’s Coconut Grove house in Miami.
I send the catalogues to Madonna’s apartment, with the paintings highlighted.
Madonna says she wants the landscapes.
Normally, for ‘small’ purchases, I lay out the money myself and Madonna pays me back.
So I go over to Sotheby’s and, with the bulk of my savings, win the auction and pay for them.
Invoice in hand, I take the paintings to Madonna’s apartment and present them to her.
‘I don’t want them,’ she says.
I assume she must be joking.
‘You’re kidding me, Madonna.’
‘I don’t want them any more and I’m not paying for them.’
As she is well aware, Sotheby’s policy is that if paintings bought in auction are returned, they will re-auction them but will retain half the proceeds.
But, for her own reasons, Madonna is pretending that she doesn’t know that.
I feel as if I am going to throw up.
‘But, Madonna, I’ve spent my own money on them. I don’t make the kind of money you make. I can’t just drop $64,000. That’s all the money I have.’
‘I don’t care.’
‘But you can’t not care.’
‘Sell them to somebody else. If they are worth that much money, sell them to somebody. I don’t care what you do. I don’t want the paintings.’
She gets up and sweeps out of the room, leaving me standing there, clutching an invoice for $64,000 and three paintings, and feeling as though she has punched me in the stomach.
I reason that in her head, she must be telling herself that because I am her brother, I should cope with whatever hand she deals me.
Still, I never dreamed that she would ever treat me with such a lack of caring or lack of respect.
Today, I suppose, is a milestone.
My first experience of the full force of my sister’s dark side, her lack of concern for someone she purports to love.
Our father instilled the values of loyalty and honour in us.
But over the years, my sister’s sense of loyalty and fairness has clearly been eroded by the adulation, the applause and the sense of entitlement.
It takes me six months to resell the three landscapes.
Six months during which I can’t pay my rent, have to borrow from friends, have to struggle to survive.
My sister, the cause of my predicament, knows this, yet does nothing.
By the time I finally recoup my money, my feelings for her have undergone a radical shift.
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