#ask me things about her if you want I will love you forever if you ask me about her
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Freaky Deaky
Billie Eilish x female reader !
A/n: I got this idea when this song popped up on my Spotify the other day. I hadn't listened to it in soooo long but omg this idea SPRUNG into my brain - this is inspired a bit by the music video so if you haven't seen it go watch it !!! And lastly enjoy đ„°
Summary: she wasn't use to this from you. But on valentines day, you decide to let that side of you show.
Warnings: smut ! Daddy kink yall đ reader is super girly, and many more kinky surprises đ
Tags: @trulyy-yourzz @eilishslut @brat-at-the-disco @chrissv4mp @n0vabug @dollyvuu
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"I've been feeling freaky deaky."
"You're on your way to see me."
14th of February. The day of love. Some is passionate, sweet, loving. And some is freaky, which is what tonight was for the both of you. You only got the courage to do this when she asked you to be her valentine. The usual flowers, chocolates and a sign. But, there was a small bag. You look inside to be faced with some lingerie. It was pink. Your favorite color. Not just any pink, a hot pink. The sexy kind of pink. It impelled you to be a bit more confident and open with her. You've had sex, sure. Countless times. But you haven't been dating for long, so ofcourse there were kinks and fantasies neither of you knew about. That changes, tonight.
You had been laying on your bed, the pink fluffy sheets felt great on your skin. You were about to get up and get ready for your night with Billie when you get a text from her.
Billsđ
- "I'll be there in 25 baby."
- "Awesome can't wait ;)âș"
- "Me too mama.đđ"
A smile spreads across your face, rolling over on your bed with a giggle. You adored the way she made you feel, forever giggly. You never really showed that side of yourself from past experiences but she brings a comfort, a safeness no one in your life has ever brought for you before. So, you can be your true selfaround her. You go to your vanity picking out the right makeup, moving onto your hair. You put it up in a cute messy but styled bun. "Cute." You say softly to yourself, messing with a few strands on the sides. Getting up and heading to your closet to pick out this satin pink robe, putting that over the lingerie Billie had gotten you.
The pink lace hugged your body just right, and she was very excited to see you in it. It'd be a lie if she said she wasn't dreaming of how you'd look in it. Shes finally getting to live that dream, and many more. You spray some nice smelling purfume on from Victoria secret, sealing the whole look. Feeling amazing. You hear a knock on the door going to open it, looking at her with a grin. Her eyes wander, going over your tits, sitting pretty in that bra. So perfectly. Your waist, hips. The see-through satin robe hid hardly anything. So she was looking. Loud and proud.
You invite her in, letting your hips sway as you go over to your bed. "The lingerie fits nicely, thank you for getting it for me." You say to her sweetly. So sweetly infact you hear her gulp. "It fits you very. Well." She joins you on the bed. "I got you a little something. Two little somethings." Her head shakes. "I told you I'm fine baby it's ok, I don't need anything." You move to grab it. "Too late. Open open!" You say handing her the pretty bag it comes in. She peeks inside seeing a strap and dildo both pink to match with everything. She looks at you, but you nod your head for her to look at the other thing.
It was these two chunky rings she had been after, you just had to get them for her. "Mama." She says looking at you. "Those were incredibly expensive, I would've gotten them." You just shake your head. "You've been so good to me I really wanted to return the favor." Your eyes were soft and genuine. "God I'm gunna fucking ravish you tonight." She growls, not standing anymore of the distance between the two of you. Her hands reach out, grabbing your face and kissing you with such lust. She slowly pushes you back on the bed hovering over you.
Her hands fiddle with the silky strings on your robe, getting it to come undone and take it off. You go to take the rest off but she stops you. One of her fantasies was to fuck you while you had something sexy like this on. She was adamant on fulfilling that. "Keep it on.." She trails off as if she wasn't done with her sentence. Her hand moves to the bottom of your underwear, snapping back a part near the crotch. You gasp as cool air hits you, biting your lip. You had no idea it had an opening. Your eyes look to her, she's just smirking. "I have things all planned baby, don't you worry." You blush, not that it was noticeable with the amount you dabbed on.
She reaches for the strap, the band being sparkly and pink, the dido being a lighter shade of that. She takes her shirt and pants off, grabbing the harness and then attaching it to herself. You watch Intently, deeply intrigued as she always just had it on whenever the two of you fucked. She notices this, slowing her movements. Almost as if she was giving you a little show. She lines up, observing how noticeably wet you were. Just for her, because of her. She was proud. Her fingers touch the skin of your pussy. Feeling the wetness. She gathers some, bringing it away and straight to her mouth. She moans at the taste, making your breath hitch.
The tip prods at your entrance, causing light moans to fill the room, whimpers. She soaks it up, repeats it in her own brain at how beautiful you sounded. She slowly sinks into you, nearly bottoming out but you grab her bicep. She kisses your head, letting you know she's right there. "Good girl, you got it." Her kisses move to your cheek. "Pretty girl, so good for me." The praise was going straight to your head. Causing your eyes to shut as the pleasure builds up. She begins to move slowly. But even at that pace it provoked your eyes to roll back, biting your candy pink lip once again. Her kisses move down to your neck, sucking hard. Marking you up. Her hands rest beside your head as she speeds up.
You move your head, opening your eyes and looking up in the mirror. Her back muscles flexing. Making your head spin as she hits the perfect spots.
Got the mirror on the ceiling...
You're in the mood to please me...
"Going to break your back." She snarls into your neck, far deep into her lust. Adoring how you'd arch into her thrusts. You moan into her ear. "P-please." She chuckles. "You want that? Want me to break your back?" You didn't even know this yet as she hadn't told you but it slips out past your lips. "Yes daddy, fuck!" Her eyes grow darker, needing to make sure she heard you correctly. "Say that again?" Then you panic, did she not like it? "I- uhm-" Her gentle hand makes contact with your jaw. "What'd you call me?" Her hips snap harshly, making your eyes yet again roll back. "Daddy!" You moan, loudly. "Fuck." She breathes. That was the thing she'd touch herself thinking about. And to actually hear it.
From the rightful source made her want to cum right then and there. "You drive me insane baby." Her tongue runs along your neck, feeling goosebumps rise on your skin. You shiver
I get so infatuated and erotic with you.
Her thrusts become relentless making it impossible for you to hold on. "Mmm, please. I'm so close." She doesn't falter. "Yeah? Go on then, want a reminder of tonight. Never going to wash this one. Wanna keep it locked away for safe keeping." She was truly feral for you and it sent you off the rails. "Bills fuck!" You screech as you cum hard all over her, feeling your legs shake. Just from seeing that, hearing and feeling everything. It makes her close. The fact she could make you feel such pleasure makes her feel powerful. Wanting to protect you. She grunts feeling the base hit her perfectly. "Fuck you have no idea what you do to me."
She says, listening carefully to your moans. And within seconds she's now cumming, it leaking out, slightly onto you aswel. Your breaths were heavy together, calming down from such an intense round of pleasure.
Abd that was just the first of many. Many rounds that night.
#billie eilish#billie eilish x reader#billie eilish x you#billie elish icons#billie ellish lyrics#billie eilish imagine#billie#billie eilish smut#billie eilish fanfiction#billie eilish fandom#billie eilish x reader smut#billie eilish x y/n#billie eilish x female reader#billie eilish oneshot
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An anger management idea
Danny wanted to strangle Ghostwriter. Being subjected to participate in a yearly Christmas story was one thing, but this was over the line. In no universe would he be okay with Jazz staring as the main love interest in the Christmas hallmark story Ghostwriter orchestrated.
(Sorry it took me so long, my tryhard self decided to make a rhyme đ read the dialogue to the tune of âA Visit from St. Nicholasâ. Every â;â is a new line of the poem, but the full poem is below.)
Jazz hummed and danced around cheerfully. She was trying on skirts and outfits, with Danny miserably tapping away on a phone without any notifications. As she twirled in front of her mirror, she said, âItâs the day before Christmas, thereâs so much holiday cheer; Iâm meeting up with a boy today, I havenât had a date in years!â
Danny scowled fiercely and looked up from his phone. âHe better be perfect, and treat you with care; Or Iâll sic Dan and Dani on him, see if he dares!â
Jazz giggled. âYou donât need to worry, Iâll be careful, little bro; Heâs the most charming boy Iâve ever met, I canât wait to go!â
Danny rubbed at his forehead, seething. A few days ago, he had accidentally pissed off the Ghostwriter again, who had cursed him again to teach him some holiday cheer. Now everyone was forced to rhyme and even worse, because Danny had been handling the Ghost Zone, he had been unable to prevent Jazz from being asked out by some asshole with a motorbike named Jason.
It was infuriating! Hadnât she learned her lesson about bad boys on bikes?!
âThis damn, stupid curse, Iâll kill the GhostwriterâŠâ Danny grumbled. âIf I didnât have to rhyme, I wouldâve been beside her; To stop her from meeting that boy just a few days ago; And now sheâs off to a date, a date on Christmas Eve, she goes!; Away from my family, leaving me all alone; Heâs the worst! The absolute worst! He had better atone!â
Jazz turned, a small and sad smile on her face as she caught the last words of his rhyme. âOh, Danny, I promise itâll be okay.â She perked up with a new idea. âYou can come with me! Itâll be a fun day!â
Danny stared at her in horror. Come with her? To her date?!
âNo thanks! I donât care! This is the worst month ever!; I donât care if you go, Iâd rather be lonely forever!â
Jazz sat on her bed beside him, smiling softly. âDanny, I understand. But itâll be Christmas soon and you shouldnât be by yourself; Come with me and Jason, weâll buy you every toy on the shelves!; Weâll drink chocolate and eat cake; Watch movies and go ice skate!; Jason wouldnât care, heâs kind like that; You wonât be a third wheel, we can all chitchat!; I promise you, heâs nice and just a great guy; Youâll have a great time, and I donât speak lies!â
Danny struggled to think, trying to imagine it. He wanted to go with her. Everyone else was busy with their own things, so all he had this week was his sister with him. And everything she said sounded really appealing.
Eventually, he conceded. â⊠fine, but you canât leave me behind; You said youâd buy me toys and you promised heâd be kind.â
Jazz cheered. âI promise, I promise! Oh, I canât wait!; For later today, for me and my date!; With a boy that I like and my favorite brother too; This will be the best Christmas ever, I promise you!â
Danny huffed but couldnât help but smile. He swore to himself softly, âFine. I hope that youâre happy; If he makes you sad, he better run quickly; Because even if I hate Christmas, youâre still my sister; So Jason better be nice, or heâll know why they call me a trickster!â
(Full poem below)
âItâs the day before Christmas, thereâs so much holiday cheer
Iâm meeting up with a boy today, I havenât had a date in years!â
âHe better be perfect, and treat you with care,
Or Iâll sic Dan and Dani on him, see if he dares!â
âYou donât need to worry, Iâll be careful, little bro.
Heâs the most charming boy Iâve ever met, I canât wait to go!â
âThis damn, stupid curse, Iâll kill the GhostwriterâŠ
If I didnât have to rhyme, I wouldâve been beside herâŠ
To stop her from meeting that boy just a few days ago
And now sheâs off to a date, a date on Christmas Eve, she goes!
Away from my family, leaving me all alone
Heâs the worst! The absolute worst! He had better atone!â
âOh, Danny, I promise itâll be okay.
You can come with me! Itâll be a fun day!â
âNo thanks! I donât care! This is the worst month ever!
I donât care if you go, Iâd rather be lonely forever!â
âDanny, I understand. But itâll be Christmas soon and you shouldnât be by yourself
Come with me and Jason, weâll buy you every toy on the shelves!
Weâll drink chocolate and eat cake
Watch movies and go ice skate!
Jason wouldnât care, heâs kind like that.
You wonât be a third wheel, we can all chitchat!
I promise you, heâs nice and just a great guy
Youâll have a great time, and I donât speak lies!â
â⊠fine, but you canât leave me behind
You said youâd buy me toys and you promised heâd be kindâ
âI promise, I promise! Oh, I canât wait!
For later today, for me and my date!
With a boy that I like and my favorite brother too,
This will be the best Christmas ever, I promise you!â
âFine. I hope that youâre happy.
If he makes you sad, he better run quickly
Because even if I hate Christmas, youâre still my sister
So Jason better be nice, or heâll know why they call me a trickster!â
#dc x dp#dp x dc#dpxdc#dcxdp#danny phantom x dc#dp x dc crossover#ask#danny fenton#jazz fenton#anon ask#jason todd#why am I so extra istg#ty for the ask <3#it was fun tho lmao#anger management ship#hardcover ship#jason x jazz#christmas
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Marry-Me-Salmon | Joel Miller x F!Reader
The amount of game Joel fics arenât enoughâŒïž Taking matters into my own hands. Though I think they somewhat behave the same! I saw these recipes of âmarry me salmonâ going around and got inspired lol. Just tooth rotting fluff and a bit predictable but I just wanna see this man happy :(đ©·
(Set in Jackson and Joel lives forever in MY blog âđŒ)
Joel had bought a ring.
It was like his body moved on its own. When he laid his eyes on the thing, he thought there could possibly be no ring that could be more you.
That was a week ago. Why he bought it, he still doesnât know. Well.. He knows exactly why. Just didnât want to do it. Scared to do it. And this is coming from a man who isnât scared of much.
You were arguably the best thing to ever walk into his life. Why you chose his hard-ass, heâll never understand. After three years of you shutting him up and convincing him that you love him (youâd make him repeat it too), by default heâd say that yes, you do love him. But deep down, he still has a hard time believing it. He just knows that heâs very scared of losing you. And that heâs a goddamn lucky bastard.
So he decided, he doesnât want to scare you off until heâs perfectly sure you wanted to be with him (yes, three whole years and he still isnât sure). The ugly insecure monster within him thinks the day will never arrive. But in the comfortable silence that you two occasionally shared tangled with each other, he somehow had a feeling. Though fleeting, he did feel from the way you squeezed his hand, that you wanted this forever thing just as much as he did. So maybe â just maybe â your words did pierce through him. And he keeps the ring in his back pocket all the time just in case.
A week ago, you had overheard some ladies in the Square telling a story about how her husband of thirty-six years decided to propose to her because she cooked him the marry-me-salmon. You scoffed at the idea. There was no way it was that simple. Right?
Fast forward to present day, a salmon fillet was laid in front of you. You didnât know how, you didnât know why, but you managed to pull the strings. Although.. you know exactly why. Just didnât wanna admit it. Shy to say it. Hence the salmon. You just wanted to cook Joel something nice. A lie you tell yourself.
The problem is, you donât really cook. You learned to, yes, and occasionally do because of the situation of the world. But the marry-me-salmon intimidated you, the scribbled recipe mocking you from the counter. Were you too desperate? No use crying over spilled milk. Or in this case, killed salmon.
âWhatâs this Iâm smelling?â You can hear the faint sound of Joelâs teasing as he made his way downstairs. You rolled your eyes, knowing heâd make fun of you attempting to cook. Before you know it, he was already behind you, trying to take a peek at what youâre making.
âGo away, itâs a surprise,â you quickly say, rushing to cover the recipe title. You would rather die than have him see that. He chuckled at your panicked reaction and raised his hands up in defeat.
âAlright, darlinâ,â he grinned ear to ear, leaving a kiss on the top of your head before retreating to the dining table. âJust donât burn down the kitchen,â he teased again. You clicked your tongue in annoyance though you canât help but smile.
You messed up the recipe a bit. And it didnât help that Joel kept looking up from the book that Ellie lent him to see what youâre cooking. You shouldnât have said it was a surprise because youâve got him awfully curious. At least itâs finally finished. You tried to plate it nicely, earning a few chuckles from Joel from how endearing you looked. It was lost on him why you had to be doing all this.
âAnd what did I do to deserve this?â He asked, cocking a brow at you when you put down the dish in front of him. He immediately closed his book, taking a whiff of the salmon.
âJust.. Cause I love you,â you smiled, taking a seat across him and propping your cheek on your palm. He chuckled again, warmth spreading in his chest. There was no way you cooked for him without any ulterior motive. If Joel learned anything from those three years with you, it is that you hate cooking unless you really have to.
But when youâre this beautiful, speaking to him so softly with that angelic smile? All for him? Joel chooses to believe you. He was a goddamn lucky bastard indeed.
âWell I love you too darlinâ, thank you,â he says genuinely in that baritone voice of his. The sweetness of the moment didnât last very long as he starts cutting the fish and you anxiously waited for his reaction. You just hope that the little mistake you made wasnât very crucial to the dish. He eventually puts it in his mouth and started chewing.
âWell?â You ask, not even giving him a second. He hummed, taking a moment to process the taste. It was quite alright. He thought it could use more salt.
âSâgood,â he nodded with a little smile. You knew damn well he was lying. And you knew that he would finish the whole thing anyway just because you made it. You wondered if the mistake you made had been that bad or if the lady at the square was full of shit.
âItâs bad, isnât it?â You pouted, pulling the plate and taking a fork to taste it yourself.
âDarlinâ, I said it was good,â he insisted, his brows knitted together. Heâd tease you til his death but heâs so sweet when he needed to be. It made you feel really bad. You finally tried it yourself and none of you were exactly right. It was just.. Average. Okay. Edible. Just needed more salt. You felt silly for not giving it a taste test before serving it.
âIâll fix it,â you say, abruptly standing up to look for the salt above the counter. It wasnât there. You hurriedly searched the kitchen like a cop scanning for drugs.
âDarlinâ,â Joel chuckled, standing with you. âWould you just sit down?â You didnât listen, suddenly remembering that you ate breakfast in front of the TV and brought the salt with you. You were already running to the couch before Joel could stop you.
As he shakes his head with a loving smile, he sees it. The scribbled recipe on the counter. The marry-me-salmon.
He felt like the wind got knocked out of his lungs. This was it. You wanted to marry him. He quickly reached into his back pocket as if he was trained to do so upon hearing the information. His mind was screaming at him, now! Now! Now! Hell, did he even prepare a question?
You got back to the kitchen to find Joel on one knee. A ring between his thumb and his pointer finger. Funny enough, you thought it really was because of the salmon. In a way, it is kind of true. Are all salmons hexed with a marriage spell no matter how bad they taste? Doesnât matter. Joel Miller, the love of your life, was finally proposing to you. You shakily exhaled as if youâve been holding your breath for a while.
âDarlinâ..â Joel began, his voice shaking. Though he didnât really know what to say except for the desperation that he felt. The urgency to just be with you. âPlease marry me?â
As tears formed in your eyes, still not believing whatâs happening, you canât help but ask him, âIs it because of the salmon?â
my masterlist
thank you for reading!! đ«¶đŒ
#joel miller#tlou#joel miller x reader#joel miller x you#joel miller x f!reader#joel miller x female reader
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Don't mind me being late as always ;-; but Ari (as you already know) this was magnificent!
Words can't describe how much I despise Yunho in this fic đ The audacity to be rude (straight up mean) to the MC WHILE KNOWING THEY ARE MATES KWEHFKWLEF THE MC IS BETTER THAN ME BECAUSE I WOULD TEAR UP THAT BOND SO FAST-
Okay, before I lose my crap let's talk about the things I LOVED WITH THE FIC.
San. San and the MC's friendship is so pure and cute. I can just see him befriending little strays, taking them under their wing like đ„č so cute. The second best thing to happen is Petrova and MC. The equivalent of I'm a mean girl to everyone but you and that's so đ€§ ugh, Petrova is just misunderstood PLEASE HEAR HER OUT-
And well, despite me not liking Yunho... I ABSOLUTELY LOVE THE FASHION TASTE YOU GAVE HIM. I was literally growling when he was first introduced. Like wdym pink crop top, waisted yellow jeans, mix-matched sneakers???? I NEED YUNHO IN A CROP TOP NOW. AND PAINTED NAILS AND LIPS TOO
Anyways, back to hating him:
âYou shouldnât show yourself to just anyone, Y/N, itâs lowly.â The pang in my heart was more painful than anything I had experienced before.
You already know my opinions about this whole scene, BUT I CANT LET IT GO????? WHO DAFUQ EVEN SAYS THAAATđđ MURDER!!!!!! UGH, I just knew his grovelling was going to be BAAAAD... there's nothing better than reading a story where the love interest is an asshole and then has to make up for it, but the MC is already through the heart break lmaoooo like its your turn now babes!!! man im getting so angry just thinking about what he put the MC through I can't even put it in to words lmaoooo (its literally fiction too, like its not that serious helpđ)
Yunhoâs heart skipped a beat as vanilla wrapped around us, his eyes regaining that pretty spark in them, âYes, just one chance, I beg. Iâll prove myself to you, Iâll treat you right, and Iâll love you unconditionally. I want to make up for the lost time, may Iâcan you let me? Iâll do whatever you ask of me.â
AND LOOK WHO COMES CRAWLING BACK AFTER GETTING A TASTE OF THA- đ No, but ari... that steamy scene YOOOOOOOOO I DIDNT EXPECT IT TO BE THAT NASTY AND KWJNF (ngl I died tho when the reader grabbed his ass- but same girl)
I could literally write forever about this fic, like the BRACELET QLFQ THE JEALOUSY AS IF HE HAS THE RIGHT TO EVEN BE JEALOU- but im afraid I'll get so worked up and its not good my heart đ
BTw, kudos to you for really putting the MC's sorrow and sadness into words. I was really heart broken reading this as if I had a fated mate who was actively cheating on me đ I love it
Take your breath away
Author: bvidzsoo
Pairing: werewolf!Jeong Yunho x werewolf!female reader
⟠Warning: nudity, quite suggestive at times (honestly, they are pretty horny for each other), cursing, unhealthy amount of subtle (or not) jealousy and possessiveness ⟠Word count: 28.9k ⟠Rating: mature ⟠Genre: supernatural creatures!au, academy!au, werewolf!au, omegaverse-ish!au, unrequited love!au...or is it?, mates!au, angst ⟠Summary: New beginnings are always scary, and you are no stranger to them as your family moves to a town called Nocturnal Parade, filled with other night creatures. You find lovely people here, a community, a pack to have your back, and even a best friend called Choi San. What you don't expect, however, is to find your mate, who wants nothing to do with you.
A/N: Hi, my lovelies, I am back! I know I was gone for a while, and I won't lie, I wasn't inspired at all and felt really depressed (some things just pilled up for me in these past autumn months and that mixed with seasonal depression have hit me hard), but I am feeling a lot better now! I won't promise anything, but I'll try to post again more often, and hopefully continue the on-going series I already have. Please, please, please, imagine Yunho in this one with long hair, like in the top-middle picture! And for those who have read my Mingi Preying on you tonight oneshot, I have some exciting news...this story happens in the same universe, sooo, you'll get more insight on everyone's character! ^^ (If you haven't checked it out yet, you should give it a read, the world building goes more in-depth there ^^) Also, important note to keep in mind: everyone in this story goes by the 'Song' surname since they are siblings! I hope you enjoy this story too, and a small reminder, your feedback always gives me an inspirational push, so I greatly appreciate hearing what you think of this oneshot! <3 divider ~ and because I might as well dedicate this oneshot to you for hyping me up and helping me out with it, I hope you enjoy it @hongjoongspoetry <3 ~
           No matter how long I looked, heâd never glance my way. I had gotten used to his constant ignorance, but it still stung. I couldnât help it, it was the only reasonable reaction considering we were mates.
It wasnât anything we had spoken about, let alone even addressed, but I had known since the very first time I had laid my eyes on him. It was the change of my pulse, the way the world seemed to quiet around me, my breathing which got shallow, my pupils dilating and my eyes switching to an orchid colour that seemed to persist as my heart thundered in my chest, loud, and overbearing as I couldnât help but watch the tall man who people surrounded, his head thrown back and mouth shielded by his long fingers as his body shook from laughing loudly. Until now I had only heard stories of what finding your mate felt like, but now I knew the feeling. I didnât need to read fairytales about it anymore, nor would I pester my mother for the nth time to retell her story about meeting my father. I wasnât desperate, per se, to find my mate, but the worry of growing old on my own had felt like a mosquito always buzzing around my ears, unable to kill it since I couldnât see it. The fear of remaining alone seemed to persist in the back of my mind, and based on my mood, sometimes it would make me angry while other times just really anxious.
While living in Colourful River, the big city from North here, finding a suitor for myself had always felt like a challenging feat. There were too many creatures and humans alike who were too nosy and pestering, and I had never felt like I could be truly myself around them. I didnât have many friends, humans or creatures, and at first, I blamed it on my shyness. Then, I started blaming it on my nerdiness as school rolled around, then it was the thought of being too plain for anyone to find me interesting and approachable, and then I gave up on finding an answer and decided that perhaps I was meant to be lonely, like my parents. In the big city, despite having lived here our whole lives, it seemed like we never found ourselves belonging to a community. Living closer to the border, the cities and towns were inhabited by many night creatures, however, that didnât seem to change much when it came to my family. Maybe it was because we were all quiet and reclusive, maybe it was because we had never truly felt comfortable surrounded by so much happening at all times. And that is why I hadnât felt any type of resistance or regret when my parents packed up our things and announced to me that weâd be leaving for a quiet and safe town just South of Colourful River, far from the border and the humans.
Nocturnal Parade has been a place Iâve heard plenty of. I knew it was inclusive of all the night creatures while being heavily influenced by the clergy. After all, itâs the town where the first attempts at a civilised and united nation amongst the night creatures had sparked. The vampires had taken the initiative, better said the Petrova family now known as Bae, were the founders of said town and the party that now advocated for all the night creatures all around the globe, making our voices heard, demanding respect and inclusion. They were, also, the ones to end the hatred between vampires and werewolves. Thanks to the effort and constant hard work, the werewolves had complied and formed one of the strongest alliances known to mankind with the vampires, pledging to fight by their side, to honour and respect them if their passion was returned by the vampires. And the respect had been mutual, the Petrovas didnât stop until justice was brought to everyone, until every night creature could live a harmonious and pleasant life. It was a bit nerve-wracking to know Iâd be cohabiting in a place with such ancient and respectable creatures from now on. From what I had heard of them until now, I knew only the daughter and her parents lived there still, keen on carrying the townâs, but also the familyâs, legacy.
I wasnât afraid of the change, however, I was reluctant and a little hesitant to join the Academy that had ultimately become a symbol of our unity and equality between us creatures. Back at my old schools, which were just simple regular schools frequented by both humans and night creatures, I wasnât very liked. Everyone seemed to single me out, even my own kind, and they hadnât always been the nicest about it. I supposed they saw me as an oddball just because I didnât enjoy chasing a ball in our breaks and would rather play video games on forums with online friends, than play pretend that I was part of their made-up pack. Which brought another issue to light. My family had never belonged to a pack. My fatherâs family had long ago moved to Colourful River, leaving behind their abusive and mistreated past, meanwhile, my motherâs family had always been tightly-knit but not inclusive of strangers. So, as the elders all died, it was just my parents and me. I didnât have any siblings, which seemed to make me even weirder since most werewolves reproduced more than once as they preferred to have big households full of children. My parents rather enjoyed the peace a single child, like me, offered them. The less mouths to feed, the better.
However, my worries seemed to be in vain once I had finally arrived in town, and then at Wilden Pine Academy. The town was lively and buzzing with creatures at every corner, all of them friendly and lacking the judgement and nosiness of the big city folk, who always watched you with inquiring eyes, desperate for a drop of gossip. Here, in Nocturnal Parade, everyone seemed to respect your space and didnât pry anything out of you, they were simply grateful that you had chosen their haven as your home. Moving here had been probably the best decision my parents couldâve made. I liked it here, living by the outskirts of the Haunted Woods was refreshing. I could go for evening runs whenever I wanted without having to share my space with other restless werewolves, who genuinely enjoyed sharing the running track with their friends. I always found solace in solitary, I could clear my mind when it got too loud in there. Runs were pretty much therapeutic to me, I quite disliked it when I was bothered by other rambunctious werewolves whoâd howl at the night sky just for the fun of it, mostly to spook the humans that ogled us rather disrespectfully.
My aloneness, however, wasnât chased away until the academic year started and I passed through the tall iron gates of the Academy. It was a sunny day and I was impressed by the heat despite being surrounded by vast forest, the drive a long four hours until the next town, which was Nocturnal Parade. My parents were probably more excited about me starting my penultimate academic year here than I was, but it didnât bother me. I knew they wished Iâd make happy and lasting memories here, unlike the lack of them at my old schools. They hoped amongst so many night creatures Iâd find at least one person who was like me, or even if not, creatures who would accept me the way I was. I hadnât been walking down for long the gravel path when my backpack was pushed off my shoulders as someone ran past me, only to pause once they realised their actions. My luggage was heavy as I had been pulling it after me, but the boy who I thought wouldnât even apologise for bumping into me, turned and faced me with furrowed eyebrows and a small pout.
âSorry, my parents always say I get too excited and lose my coordination.â The boyâs voice had been gruff, a contrast with his soft features despite his sharp face. His eyebrows were straight, his eyes small and dark, his nose petite and pointy, lips pouty and fleshy, his jawline and cheekbones both sharp and defined. His short hair and the razor cut in his left eyebrow made him look intimidating until he spoke or smiled. His lips formed a pout and his eyes disappeared as a dimpled smile formed on his face, brightening his features. He was a cute boy and I had let him help me pick up my backpack, which, surprisingly, he didnât hand back and threw around his own shoulder instead, âAre you the new family in town? The Byuns?â
I nodded and then extended a hand for him to shake, âMy name is Byun Y/N, nice to meet you.â
âIâm Choi San!â The boy shook my hand with excitement lacing his tone, âI was on a holiday when your family arrived in town, that is why I wasnât able to attend the welcoming party organised by the Songs.â
âAh, itâs fine.â I muttered as I had started walking again, San falling in step with me, âThe party was ratherâŠoverwhelming. Not that I didnât appreciate it, but I had never been surrounded by so many loving people at once.â
San chuckled under his breath as he seemed to carry his two duffle bags as if they weighed nothing. It wasnât hard to guess what type of creature he was simply based on his appearance already. He was massive next to me, his shoulders wide and strong looking, his chest puffed out and back rigidly straight, his hips surprisingly narrow, but his legs well-worked. He wasnât too tall, but he had almost a head on me. Besides, his spicy scent was strong and confident, a little bit too harsh for my sensitive nose buds, but not nauseating. And like the rest of the werewolves who had been at the welcoming party, I felt no malice nor judgement coming from San, just a lot of excitement and joy as he had led us towards the right wing of the Academy, where the designated dorms for the werewolves were.
âIt might sound a little bit strange, but all the werewolves act like a big pack here in Nocturnal Parade, I assume you didnât have that back in the city?â Sanâs perfectly straight eyebrow raised as he threw me a quick glance since we were nearing more students, and San was obviously popular. Everyone seemed to greet him, eager to gain his attention.
âNot really,â I answered San, walking ahead to pull the buildingâs door open for him, âMy family didnât belong to a pack, actually.â
That had gotten Sanâs attention as his eyes widened once we stepped through the threshold, the inside of the building just as grandiose as the outside. It was spacious with big windows, natural light seeping through and casting a warm glow over the space, âIt mustâve been lonely, then. But fear not, the Songs will adopt your family quite quickly, if they havenât already.â
I smiled, my heart had skipped a beat at the mention of the kind, but energetic family, âThey have already, actually. They had pulled my parents aside before the party and told them that we were now part of the pack, of the family, and that the community would be there for us.â
San hummed as we went up the first flight of stairs, a small smile on his face, âOur community hadnât always been as close as it is now, but with the Songs' arrival to Nocturnal Parade everything just fell into place. I donât think I had seen them go a day without doing something for the town or for their fellow creaturesâhey, which floor is your room at?â
And that had been one year ago, when I was new to the town and wondering whether San would ever again speak to me. Right now, however, as we sat in the Flower Field behind campus, laying on a blanket and basking in the late afternoon sun, I knew San wouldnât go a day without speaking to me. Spring was finally around the corner, and so was the Spring Break every student was impatiently awaiting. One week back home sounded really nice right now, I never failed to miss my privacy. The dorms at the Academy were shared, and my roommate snored really loudly and whined all the time. It was hard to discipline the second youngest of the Song family, so the Academyâs ruling board decided to place her with someone older than her, more mature, and possibly a good influence on the fiery blonde who liked to wreak havoc wherever she went. Not in our shared room, though, I had laid down some ground rules after rooming with Song Yeri. No loudness nor messiness was allowed, and of course, she couldnât bring back boys into our shared room. As long as I didnât, she wasnât allowed either. She wasnât thrilled by the idea, but because her parents had gotten really close with mine over the past year, Yeri was forced to abide by the rules out of fear of me ratting her out to her loving, but unforgiving, parents.
The air was still chilly and youâd become cold if you sat in one spot for too long, but the bodies of werewolves were warmer, our blood hotter, almost to the point of boiling in our veins. My cheeks were rosy as I sat with my legs crossed, a book in my lap as San hummed a silent tune next to me, laying on his stomach as he solved equations. He was planning on leaving for the big city to pursue further education, but he promised to return once he was done with it. He aspired to teach at Wilden Pine Academy, and I was more than eager to be his number-one supporter. He was great with children, and even those older seemed to respect him. San had a demanding aura, and despite him never taking advantage of that, he did know when he had to put his foot down and stop someone from running all over him. Being friends with San had showed me the wonders of companionship, of what a natural and gentle, but platonic, love felt like. I could share whatever was on my mind, at any given time, and San would be there to listen, and even take my ideas further beyond my imagination.
He was a driving force when it came to my creativity, always inspiring me and pushing me to do better and to go harder because I was capable of creating grand things. I wasnât too sure of what Iâd do once I was done with the Academy, but I could see myself being a novelist. It wouldnât be easy at first, but if I remained diligent and focused on my task, I knew I could do itâat least San had told me so, he was kind like that. Whenever I felt insecure about something, he picked me up and changed my mind about it in mere minutes, grinning from ear to ear as his eyes twinkled. If kindness had a definition, it shouldâve simply said Choi San, and I was sure everyone would understand why. The serenity surrounding us, however, didnât last for long as a squeal of my best friendâs name echoed around the blooming flowery field. Sanâs body tensed for just a second before he turned onto his back, sitting up as he leaned back on his hands, looking towards the boy he was too scared to confess his true feelings to.
âSannie!â With little regard for those around him, Wooyoung threw himself at San, tackling him back down into the blanket as San groaned, the back of his head colliding with the hard ground, âStop doing your homework and come on a run with me, hmm?â
Wooyoung was a charming young man, mischievous and painfully loud, but he had good intentions. If I ignored him always trying to sway San away from studying, then yes, he did mostly have good intentions. I shifted a bit since Wooyoungâs leg dug painfully into my hip, who was still ignoring my presence as he blinked at San slowly, placing his hands on my best friendâs firm chest as San tried to stabilise Wooyoung by holding onto his waist.
âI have a bit of homework still to do, though.â Sanâs voice was quiet as the sun shone down on the two friends, and I smiled to myself as I went back to reading my book, âCould you wait for half an hour?â
âBut Iâve been waiting all day for you.â I could hear the pout in Wooyoungâs voice, breathy and whiny as I chuckled under my breath, eyes focusing on the words in my book. It was jarring how alike Yeri and him were at times.
âThen you can wait a bit longer.â Sanâs tone wasnât harsh, but it was chastising a bit, and it made Wooyoung groan as I smiled to myself, amused by their antics. I was sure that if I could hear Sanâs slight change of heartbeat, the spiciness of his scent spiking too, then Wooyoung was aware of it too. Sometimes I wondered how the latter didnât realise Sanâs obvious feelings for him, but I suppose Wooyoung wasnât a very observant person, unlike his older brother, Mingi.
âCan I stay thoughââ Then I felt eyes on myself and I heard shuffling around, Wooyoung finally removed himself from on top of San, âOh, hey, Y/N. What are you doing?â
âReading,â I muttered as I flipped the page, bored by the story but knowing I had just two days to finish reading the remaining two hundred pages.
âIs it for Literature class?â Wooyoung pressed, coming closer as he hovered over my shoulder, âYunhoâs been complaining about how shitty the book was, something about the story being too slow-paced and the side love story not making too much sense.â
I hummed, completely agreeing with Yunho, who shared a Literature class with me. At the same time, I was beyond grateful that I had learned to control my reactions at the mention of Song Yunho, who had looked my way a total of three times ever since I had arrived to Nocturnal Parade. I didnât understand what I had done wrong to be brushed off so blatantly by him, but it hurt. It had hurt a lot more in the beginning, but I had gotten used to the feeling of dejection and disappointment that followed whenever we crossed paths. I didnât understand whether I had upset him or not, considering that our first encounter had gone rather well. To me, it had gone more than well, but maybe Yunho didnât share the sentiment. Almost as if summoned by some deity, I didnât have to look to know he was approaching us. My body knew upon a simple whiff of the air, the earthy and intense scent of firewood and vanilla making my lungs feel like they couldnât expand anymore to breathe in deeper, my skin covered in goosebumps as the world seemed to quieten around me in his presence. Yunhoâs tall shadow was looming over us as he stopped at the foot of the blanket, his question directed at Wooyoung.
âDid you take my cologne, again, Wooyoung?â He didnât sound angry, but his tone was demanding. I heard Wooyoung scoff next to me as he sat mirroring my position, looking up at his brother with a defying look in his eyes.
âNo, I donât like its scent.â Wooyoung was bad at lying, especially when we had heightened and sensitive senses and he was reeking of Yunhoâs sandalwood essence cologne.
âSure, where did you put it? I need it.â I didnât have to look to see Yunho roll his eyes, I continued feigning that I was reading the book, but my eyes were stuck on the same sentence as I read it over and over again, the words not registering in my mind. It was hard to focus when Yunho was around. Â
âAre you going on a date, or whatâs the rush?â I willed my heartbeat to remain steady at Wooyoungâs teasing question, to bite back the whine that threatened to leave my lips. I had no right to make claims over Yunho, but my wolf seemed to struggle to understand that. We werenât mated, and weâd probably never be with how Yunho disregards my existence.
âWhere is it, Wooyoung?â Yunho had lost his patience as his voice had an edge, his shadow still looming over us as I heard San fidget around as he turned onto his stomach to continue his homework.
âIn Mingiâs bottom drawer, by the bed, where he keeps his condomsââ
âAlright.â Yunhoâs tone raised, a tired huff leaving his mouth as San snickered under his breath. I didnât react but I wouldâve smiled too, Wooyoungâs brutal honesty and oversharing skills, I fear, would never be matched by anyone else Iâd come across. I had a feeling it was the same for San and Yunho too, âStop taking my things or Iâll tell mom.â
âStop being a pussy and always ratting me out to mom,â Wooyoungâs tongue was stuck out as Yunho leaned down and harshly flicked his little brotherâs forehead, making him yelp, âIâm telling mom!â
âWhoâs the pussy now, huh?â I couldnât help the smile spreading onto my lips this time as Wooyoung started whining loudly as he rubbed his forehead, his scent souring just a little bit.
Sanâs heart skipped a beat and I wondered whether the other two noticed, but based on their glaring contest, I highly doubted it, âWhatever, Y/Nâs reading the same book as you are. Didnât you sayââ
âIâll see you at dinner, Wooyo.â Yunhoâs sharp intake of breath made me gulp as I fought hard to not show my disappointment, I knew Yunho wasnât interested in me, but going to the extent of not even wanting to hear about me definitely stung a lot, âAnd donât bother Sannie too much.â
Donât bother Sannie too much, but I suppose he could bother me. Not that Yunho had even noticed me lounging around on the blanket, despite Wooyoung being almost all nestled up into my side since San wasnât paying any attention to him now. I gulped down the bitterness and growing lump in my throat as Yunho departed, his footsteps loud and heavy, the sounds of the world returning to my ears once he wasnât around anymore. Breathing was easier too, but it was a bit difficult seeing anything written on the yellowing paper since my vision was suddenly blinded by tears. It was alright, I have heard of mates that werenât fated to be together. Of mates where only one of them imprinted on the other, and was forced to watch the love of their life mate with someone else, forced to live and die alone, without having ever experienced true and honest love. It was alright, I wouldnât know how to gesticulate a relationship either way. I gulped and blinked my eyes fast, willing the tears to disappear before Wooyoung could notice them.
The younger boy sighed loudly next to me before he rolled over, crawling on Sanâs back as he laid his cheek against his friendâs scapula, âDo you mind if I take a nap like this?â
âNo.â Sanâs voice was deeper as we shared a knowing look, Wooyoung remaining oblivious to Sanâs racing heart as his cheeks flushed in embarrassment when I gave him a subtle wink. If I couldnât find my happiness, then I truly wished at least my best friend would. Heâd deserve it, San deserved to be cherished and loved like no one else, and I had a feeling Wooyoung would be able to provide San with everything he needed. If only he wasnât so oblivious to Sanâs feelings, besides, I had never seen Wooyoung courting anyone, we had no idea of his preferences. Whenever San tried to bring up the subject, heâd told me Wooyoung would smartly twist it until they werenât even talking about it anymore. Maybe he was avoiding it because he had noticed Sanâs reactions and was afraid to hurt his best friend, or maybe he was avoiding it because he had been feeling something he didnât understand quite yet. It wasnât taboo for werewolves to find love amongst their own gender, but I suppose growing up in a place where nobody was like you must be nerve-wracking and rather full of uncertainty. This only made me realize that despite the cons of living in the big city had its pros as well since I grew up in a diverse and inclusive place, open and uncaring of who loved who.
But if Wooyoungâs romantic preferences remained unknown to us, Yunhoâs certainly didnât. He was unlike anyone I have met before, starting from his personality and ending with his looks. He was the eldest of the family, a good few minutes older than his twin brother, Mingi, and so naturally he was also the biggest and strongest. He was intimidatingly tall and freakishly broad, his shoulders wide and his back strong. He wasnât visibly muscular but Iâve seen him countless times lifting logs, and even heavier things, without breaking a sweat to know that Yunho was outrageously strong. His hair was a dark brown and it had grown out since I had first met him, now always messy and curly as it reached his shoulders, making him look more boyish than the first time I had seen him. He had red highlights in his hair a year ago, adding to his mysterious allure, as his lips were a soft pink, the apple of his cheeks and nose dusted coral, which was a nice contrast with his paler complex, unlike Mingiâs whose skin was a beautiful caramel. The twins werenât identical, but upon a closer look, you were able to tell just how many attributes they shared.
Yunho loved experimenting with his style, and he mostly wore coloured clothes, all flashy and somehow still cosy looking, however, his shoes always seemed to be mismatched. It was a peculiar feat that had me wondering whether Yunho was just generally weird or he just had a particular taste when it came to fashion, I soon had realized it was the latter. His nails were always well-kept and painted either a turquoise or a yellow colour, bringing attention to his already beautiful hands, his fingers long and bony and mostly decorated by black rings. His scent, that earthy firewood and vanilla, was just as attention-grabbing as the rest of Yunho. If I hadnât known better, I wouldâve assumed Yunho was a very serious person, highly focused on his education, someone who spent his days cooped up in his room reading and learning all the time. But the Songs werenât too focused on getting high grades, and that became apparent rather quickly after I arrived at the Academy. Yunho was a goofy guy, he loved having fun and he really enjoyed being surrounded by people, always eager to share a laugh with someone, or just fall into idle chitchat for hours on end. People seemed to gravitate towards him, eager to have a word with him. It wasnât just him, though, students at the Academy all seemed to love the Song family, especially the twins who felt like fresh air in the dull and mediocre town that Nocturnal Parade seemed to be at first glance.
However, as mediocre as it was, I had never felt more at ease in a place before. It truly felt like I had found a community for myself and for my family, a place where everyone had your back and expected nothing in return even at the slightest of help offered. My parents loved it here, it was rather obvious since my mother was smiling more, the wrinkles were gone from her face, and my father wasnât as stressed as before. Working as an archivist in the big city had been demanding, but in this quiet town where nobody was rushing forward with their lives, my parents could take a breather. And I could too, until I quickly realized I had been blatantly rejected by my potential mate before even getting to know them. The day we had arrived in Nocturnal Parade had been long and nerve-wracking, I had no idea what would await us in this new place. That same day, the werewolves threw a welcoming party for our family, eager to welcome us into their pack.
It was late evening by the time my family had sorted most things out at our small house, which was on the same street as the Songs and right by the Pinecone Forest, the perfect neighbourhood for relentless werewolves that needed a lot of space to get rid of their impulsive energy. The party was in the backyard of the Songs family and was full of creatures by the time we made it there. It was warm, welcoming, and felt genuine from the second we stepped through their threshold. The family was big, but each one of them was gentle and eager to meet us, even the troublemakers which were Wooyoung and Yeri. And after that, it didnât take long for me to become once again invisible as I stood close to the drinks table in the Songs' backyard, gazing out towards the bonfire as the sun was about to set. The evening breeze was warm still and a light sheen of sweat coated my temples as I sipped my cool lemonade slowly, embarrassed to refill it for the fourth time. My solace, however, didnât last for longer as I noticed two towering figures beeline towards me. Their hair was tousled and they looked like they had been wrestling before they headed here, and I felt nervous upon realizing that they were probably the twins Mrs. Song had been talking about.
They had been out on their evening run and would only join us later, and they were very much so headed my way to introduce themselves. My heart was racing and I felt nervous, but I willed myself to calm down since I didnât want to embarrass myself in front of two potential classmates once Iâd started attending Wilden Pine Academy, which had been another anxiety-inducing thought at that time. The two guys, so very different in appearance yet so similar in mannerisms, sported matching smiles on their faces by the time they reached me. The one who was dressed in all-black and wore heavy jewellery had long hair which was pulled back into a half-up ponytail, his hair blonde and red, a rather cool-looking hairstyle. His features were sharp and his gaze was intense, but his open-mouthed boxy smile softened his features, his crooked front teeth endearing. The other one, however, was dressed in a pink crop top and high-waisted yellow jeans, one of his sneakers green meanwhile the other was turquoise. His hair had been shorter than the other guyâs, darker in colour too as it had red highlights, parted at the forehead. His features were a lot softer, his eyes rounder and warm, his cheeks puffy and rosy, his pouty lips a dark purple. His nails were painted turquoise and his jewellery was a lot simpler than the other guyâs, and I quickly realised that unless he was smiling, he looked just as intimidating as his twin brother.
But really, Yunhoâs appearance wasnât the first thing that caught my attention, sure, he looked unusual and made me remember the days when I was a lot younger and would purposefully dress up my Barbie dolls in silly outfits and organise pageants for them, but it was all about his scent and demeanour. The world seemed to dim around me when we had made eye contact, my arms and legs feeling numb suddenly as his rich earthy musky scent tinged with a hint of sweat invaded my nostrils, followed by firewood mixed with vanilla making my tongue feel like lead. My heart was racing and I couldnât do anything about it as I watched Yunhoâs pupils expand, his body turning rigid as Mingi remained oblivious to the subtle exchange between me and his twin. I had known that whatever I felt just upon a glance and a whiff werenât simple reactions of my body, but when I heard his voice and touched his warm skin, all of my fears and worries were answered.
âHi,â It was the slightly shorter twin that addressed me first, his voice deep and lightly raspy, âYou must be the Byunsâ daughter, right?â
I wasnât able to find my voice as I nodded wordlessly, hands tightening around my cup of icy lemonade. Thankfully they didnât seem offended by my lack of verbal response, I could only pray they would assume my heart raced so wildly because I was nervous. I tried to ignore the fact that the taller twinâs heart was thumping even louder than my own heart, blaming it on the remaining adrenaline from his run, âMy name is Yunho and this is my twin brother, Mingi.â
One large hand was extended towards me then, and as I grabbed it to shake it, I was positive Yunho mustâve felt the electricity that coursed through my body at the simple touch. It had felt as if my whole being was charged, as if I was experiencing the whole world for the first time. Everything sounded sharper, looked brighter, and smelled fresher. I could feel Yunhoâs pulse in my own palm, his gorgeous eyes shaking as we stood frozen, gripping each otherâs hands tightly. But upon Mingiâs awkward throat clearing, I ripped myself away from under the charm, and faced the guy with a small smile, âNice to meet you two, Iâm Y/N.â
Touching Mingi, however, felt like touching anyone else. My body was still tingling from Yunhoâs touch, but I had felt nothing special as Mingi grinned widely at me, his handshake just a little firmer than Yunhoâs had been. Once we released each otherâs hands I was quick to down my lemonade, subtly trying to pat the sweat from my temples away, embarrassed over the fact that my scent was most probably spiking and irking them. But neither boy commented about it as Yunhoâs deep eyes remained trained on me, tracking all of my actions.
âYou just arrived, right?â Yunhoâs voice was a lot steadier than mine had been, and I gulped, trying to ignore the sigh that threatened to leave my lips at the warm rumble of his tone.
âYes, somewhere around noon. The drive wasnât too long, though.â I hoped if I spoke fast and a lot they would blame my reactions on nervousness, âWeâve been looking forward to moving here, Iâve heard a lot of great things about this town due to the Petrovas and everything. I assume living here is rather good.â
The mention of that name seemed to make the twins grimace, but I didnât pry and they didnât say anything about it, âSurely it is, weâve moved here roughly nine years ago, but it just feels like we were meant to be in this town, to live here.â
Mingiâs tone was earnest as he spoke and I smiled at him, my eyes constantly slipping back onto Yunho, who looked like he hadnât blinked since the twins had reached me. I gulped and smiled softly at him, wondering whether he felt the same visceral emotions as I did in his presence, under his burning stare.
âI hope Iâll find a home in this town too, I havenât been here for long, but it certainly feels a lot cosier than the big city had been for my whole life.â My tone turned a bit sour as I shifted on my feet, making the twins look at me curiously.
âYouâre from Colourful River, right? Itâs a big city, we always liked going there for random trips.â It made me wonder if Yunho and I had unknowingly run into each other before, but my inner wolf told me that we hadnât. If we had been, Iâm sure our parents wouldâve never been able to separate us from each other, âIt mustâve been nice living amongst humans.â
I tried not to stare at Yunhoâs inviting plush lips while he spoke, but it was hard. Everything about him was so captivating, âSince the city is closer to the South than North, it isnât dominated by humans, but they were rather alright, not as scared as all the legends say. But if you go up North they might not be as friendly as those living closer to the border.â
âDid you have human friends?â Mingiâs tone was eager as he grinned at me, and I didnât want to disappoint him, but there was no point in lying to these two.
âI didnât have many friends,â I muttered, chuckling a bit sadly, âBut the humans were less evil compared to the night creatures.â
Silence settled upon the three of us as I didnât look up at the two, but Yunhoâs stare remained insistent. He had stepped closer meanwhile we had been conversing, and I hadnât even noticed until his strong scent hit my nose once again, making me take a deep breath and gulp it down hungrily, thankful when it felt like the scent got stuck in my throat. I hadnât experienced anything like this before, but the yearning to be close to him, to touch him and feel him was overwhelming all of a sudden as I looked up, finding Yunhoâs head tilted as his eyes slowly racked over my body. It made my cheeks burn and my muscles tense, my wolf stirring in something that I could only call arousal. I have certainly not experienced anything like this before with anyone. I wondered if this meant anything deeper, whether imprinting on first sight was a real thing or only something made up for hopeless romantics.
âYouâll see finding friends here will be a lot easier than in the big city,â Mingiâs smile was warm and he reached a hand out to pat my arm, making Yunhoâs eyebrows furrow as he looked at his twin sharply. Mingi just cast him a curious glance before his name was being called by his mother, her voice louder than the cacophony of the party, âOh, Iâll be back after I see what mom needs from me.â
Then he left, jogging towards his mother with a smile. Yunho, however, took another step towards me, looming over me as his eyebrows furrowed, nostrils flaring as I gulped nervously, wondering whether he felt the same as I did. I wanted to ask, but I was embarrassed. He reached a hand forward, his fingers brushing against mine, but he seemed to catch himself as he took a step back, jaw set tightly. And then, without saying anything, he turned and hurried away, ignoring the people who called out his name. My heart raced as I watched him leave, suddenly feeling cold and empty. The wolf in my head whined and whispered at me to chase after him, to claim him and tell him that he was ours, but I couldnât do that. Yunho had free reign of his feelings and thoughts, I couldnât force something like that on him. We hadnât even known each other five minutes ago, it wouldâve been so wrong.
But what was even more wrong and more painful than anything I had experienced before was the fact that Yunho never looked my way again after that, remaining silent and avoidant, ignorant, heâd even flee the room if it was just the two of us. I didnât even have the chance to have him before I lost him, and deep down, I knew I had been denied by my own mate. It was painful, but it wasnât anything I could change, at least, it didnât feel like it at the moment.
           With the Spring Break right around the corner, the hallways were liverier than before as students pilled together, eagerly discussing what they were up to once theyâd return home. The professors seemed to be in a lighter mood as well, a lot friendlier too, and more understanding if someone slacked off a bit. Everyone but our Literature professor, who demanded we hand in our essays right before the week ended. Today was Friday and weâd be heading home tomorrow, I was hitchhiking with Sanâs family since theyâd offered to drive us home as they were out of town and would drive by our Academy on their way home. Sanâs parents were busy businessmen so they were always on the go, oftentimes leaving San and his much older sister at home, who was a rather successful makeup artist in Nocturnal Parade and not just. Sheâd gotten an out-of-town offer just last month and the gig went well, so, she was now successfully expanding her business. But because I had been procrastinating my essay until the last moment, it meant that I had been cooped up in the Library this whole morning, and then later in the Study Hall as late evening was approaching.
My muscles ached from sitting in the same spot for so long and my eyes stung from being too dry, I had been staring at my laptopâs bright screen for an ungodly amount of time, if I wasnât a werewolf I bet my eyesight would be horrible by now. Thankfully, the Study Hall was a lot less packed than usual, and the absence of students meant I could work in peace without distractions. That is until Yunho decided to walk into the vast room, eyes scanning the place and quickly jumping over my presence as my eyes burned into the side of his head. Of course, it was no surprise that I had been completely ignored by him once again, resigned, I went back to the finishing touch-ups of my essay. My heart ached and my hands felt cold now that I knew Yunho was in my vicinity, so close, yet miles away still. I gulped and willed myself to ignore his musky scent that seemed to haunt my every sense now, and I couldâve cheered when I was finally finished with the essay. I didnât waste any more time sending it to my professor as I swiftly gathered my things and rushed out of the Study Hall, heart racing in my chest.
My muscles had been aching for an evening run and I knew Iâd have to skip dinner tonight since I felt restless, my thoughts messy and filled with anxious whispers. Since most students were returning home tomorrow morning, it meant that the community would be organising a welcome home bonfire as soon as possible. The bonfires were great and I always had a good time, but it was inevitable to come across the Song family there since they were the main organizers of it. Just last year, when the Summer Break finally arrived, I had been squeezed between Wooyoung and, tragically, Yunho on a log, forced to endure Yunhoâs rigid stance and complete ignorance as he chatted and laughed with everyone around us. My skin had been burning, not because of the close proximity to the fire, and my wolf was whining at me to touch him, to lean closer, to speak to Yunho. But I knew it was pointless, and thus, decided to save myself from embarrassment as I quickly excused myself and walked back home, rather glad that San wasnât home to pester me about my sudden sour mood. San was a dear friend, but sometimes he was awful at giving me space, at understanding that I needed to be alone to figure my thoughts and feelings out.
That was why I never let him know when Iâd go on runs, I preferred to be alone either way. The air wheezing past my ears, which were in tune with everything around me, was always freeing and relaxing. My jumbled thoughts became a silent murmur in the back of my mind as my paws hit the forest floor powerfully, strong and long legs carrying me far away from the Academy, from the campus, from any other possible wolf that I could come across. I liked solitary, itâs what I knew my whole life, it was comfortable and comforting. Whenever I let my wolf take over, it was as if I was reborn once I shifted back into my human form. I felt invincible as my burgundy fur gleamed under the setting sun rays, and I leered whenever another animal made haste in my presence. In my wolf form, everything felt simpler, more primitive, and less complicated. If I could, I would probably never shift back into my human form, but that was unethical and very unhealthy. I wasnât a wolf, I was just a simple werewolf, and abandoning my human side would mean that I was going rogue. And lone, rogue, werewolves never survived for long. It wasnât what we were designed for, so I couldnât abandon my true self.
My run tonight had taken longer than usual, the forest was now dark as I returned to the shed that lay just on the outskirts of the campus, not too close, but not too far either in case of an emergency. I had found it on an early morning stroll with San, and I had been using it as my hideout ever since. It was a good spot for privacy while Iâd change out of my clothes, away from prying eyes when Iâd turn back into my human form, naked and unprotected. I wasnât uncomfortable by nudity, after all, it was rather common and normal amongst werewolves to see each other bare, but I was shy, and thus, preferred to remain hidden from otherâs eyes. San had joked once that I was a prude and old-fashioned, but I just simply wished that not everyone saw me so exposed, it was a tiny bit embarrassing even if it was very normal for our kin. So, the shed was the perfect spot for me to stay out of sight while being close enough to campus that if I was late for curfew Iâd make it back swiftly and unnoticed, like tonight. I knew I probably had only a few minutes to make it back to the right wing, but as I had no devices on me, I wouldnât know until I made it back to my clothes. San was certainly blowing up my phone by now, asking where I was and why I didnât join him when it was quiz nightâwhich only meant that I would question him about whichever lesson he had decided he didnât know well enough, so really, it wasnât a fun activity, but I loved San, so, I helped him out from time to time.
Taking a deep whiff of the air, waiting for a second to determine whether anyone was in my vicinity, I was glad when my wolf sensed nothing, so I nudged the shedâs door open with my fur-coated head and walked inside. The small lamp I had turned on cast a dim warm hue over the abandoned place, and I approached the table as I felt my bones shifting, my jaw locking in tight and my lungs constricting for a second. My joints popped and my head felt like it was splitting in two, but it all lasted for a second or two, until I was standing tall on my legs, hands reached out to stabilise myself on the table. Shifting wasnât painful by any means, but it always left me a bit disoriented. The doctors in the city had told me it was because I was an early bloomer, my body forced to mature before its right time, so it wasnât anything necessarily bad, just uncomfortable. As I regained my senses and shook my head to clear the dizziness, my muscles locked up and my wolf purred loudly, almost to the point it escaped past my own lips. Something was amiss. In the dim lighting, I noticed another heap of clothes thrown on the ground, just by the entrance. The scent tooâŠit was familiar, too familiar, and I panicked. How had I missed it? Had I become so used to it that it didnât faze my wolf anymore?
As I hastily tried to grab my clothes, nakedness be damned Iâd get dressed on the way, the shedâs door was slammed open, a low grunt echoing in the otherwise silent space. My eyes widened as a gorgeous black wolf with orchid eyes stared back at me, huffing and puffing as saliva dripped from its mouth. It was big and strong, its vanilla and firewood scent a lot more permeating than before. My knees felt weak as my hands tightened into the table, holding myself up since my brain was short-circuiting. For a second, the big black wolf didnât move, its snarl loud in the shed, but then, bones cracked and the black fur slowly disappeared as the wolf shifted into something more human looking, tall and lean, strong andâŠvery naked. My eyes widened when I finally realised it was Yunho standing in the doorway, his eyes still orchid coloured as they bled into mine, and I was frozen as my wolf started whining, whispering to me to approach Yunho, to touch his hot and strong body, to entice him and make him claim us.
Yunhoâs body was anything like I had seen before. He was alluring by all means, and the lower my eyes dropped the tighter my chest felt, the lump in my throat getting bigger and harder to ignore. I had seen many guys naked before, but they couldnât compare to Yunho, everything about him wasâŠbig. My hands flattened against the surface of the table and I tilted my head before I could stop myself, well aware that my wolf was more in charge of me than my own conscience, my eyes a bright orchid as Yunhoâs lips pressed into a straight line, his eyes not shy of taking in every curve of my body, his hands balling up into fists at his sides. It was hard to breathe, and it was even harder to control my bodily reactions when Yunho was so close, so exposed and vulnerable for taking. And maybe he was thinking the same thing because all of a sudden, we were moving towards each other, our eyes glimmering in the dim light and our chests heaving as I bared my fangs at Yunho, whose lips curled into a low snarl. I was so close to touching him, I could feel his body heat, but I knew I couldnât. We werenât ourselves just yet, the adrenaline coursed through our bodies from the run, and our wolves were stronger and louder than under normal circumstances. He wouldâve been so easy to touch, though, as we stopped barely a few feet away from each other, desire written all over his features, but in a last attempt to find control over my body and mind, I snapped out under my wolfâs control.
I found my voice, but just barely, as my cheeks flushed a deep red, âIâmâIâI thought nobody knew of the shed, IâIâm, uh, Iâm sorry for barging in. I didnât knowâIâve never seen you here before, Iââ
âY/N.â Yunhoâs voice was deeper than ever before, his round eyes dangerous as they were narrowed into slits, watching me closely. Just hearing my name said like that shut me up really fast as my heart raced in my chest, and I knew Yunho could hear it. It was so loud. I couldâve touched him, my wolf wanted it desperately, but Yunho wasnât himself just yet, he didnât look like it, âIâve gone to this Academy for longer than you, of course I know about this place. Mingi and I come here all the time.â
I released a shuddering breath, forcing my eyes to stay on his face, anywhere but lower as I couldnât trust myself and my wolf just yet. I really wanted to reach out and trace his firm muscles, to cradle him close to myself, to burry my face between his pecks, to lick the sweat beads that rolled down his navel, lower into his happy trail until they reached hisâ âYou should go before Mingi returns.â
I jumped, mouth dry as I realised I was staring lower than I was supposed to, my whole chest and ears burning now, not just my cheeks, âIâm sorry.â I managed to mutter before I hurried back to the table and clumsily put on my clothes. I knew I looked like I had been mauled by how messy my hair was, my shirt untucked and one of the pantlegs rolled lower than the other, but I needed to leave before Iâd do something Iâd regret later. Yunho wasnât mine, we werenât mated, and I couldnât do anything about it. But as I went to rush past him, he caught my wrist with frightening speed, his palm hot and large. I gulped but didnât look at him, my eyes falling on the heap next to his clothes, very clearly Mingiâs now that he had pointed it out.
âYou shouldnât show yourself to just anyone, Y/N, itâs lowly.â The pang in my heart was more painful than anything I had experienced before. What did he mean by that? I had literally been on out a run, of course, I wasnât showing myself to just anyone, it was only normal I was naked, or was I supposed to shift while wearing my clothes only to rip them apart? Besides, who had permitted him to say such things when he was the biggest manwhore I had known to date?! His words hadnât just hurt me, they ignited an angry fire deep in my veins that had lay dormant for too long.
âIs it lowly shifting back into my human form after a run, Yunho? Really?â I chuckled humourlessly, my next words coming out in a snare as I looked at him with a glare, âYouâre rather quick to judge me when you have no shame sleeping with half of the Academy, shouldnât that be considered lowly?â
Before Yunho could say anything and before I could regret the words I had just spoken, I stormed off, flinching as I almost collided with a large white wolf, its head tilted in confusion as we stared at each other for a second. I gulped and averted my orchid-coloured eyes, âHello, Mingi.â
The wolf huffed and bowed his head slightly, and despite wanting to flee, I pushed the door open for him as the wolf let out an appreciative whine, its eyes switching between Yunho and me once it was halfway inside the shed. But I didnât wait around to hear Mingiâs questions as I rushed back to campus, checking my phone to see five missed calls from San and ten even angrier texts than the voicemails he left, clearly upplaying his sadness. I could hear Wooyoungâs witchy cackle in the background as he no doubt was playing on Sanâs new PlayStation. A quick text later, I let San know that I had lost track of time while I was on my run and that weâd see each other during breakfast the next morning. Sneaking around the dorms to sleep in Sanâs bed tonight wouldâve been worth, if only my heart and mind werenât in turmoil, aching all over again due to Yunhoâs nasty and undeserved assumptions. I had no idea why he acted so differently with me, itâs like he was a completely different person in my presence, and I didnât enjoy it. It hurt me deeply. What had I done to deserve such coldness from him?
           The ride home with the Chois was filled with laughter and sharing stories, the radio lowered once San and I started telling them about the Academy and our classes. Sanâs family had always felt like a second family to me. They were warm and very loving people, even if I had initially struggled to warm up to them, they had never pushed or pried for any information, no matter how insignificant it was. Thus, I came to trust them rather quickly since Mrs. Choi loved baking and would often invite me over during the holidays. Besides, Iâd always leave with a basketful of whichever cookies Mrs. Choi decided to bake that day, and since my mother has a sweet tooth, she was always more than eager to send me over to the Chois to help them out. Sanâs parents' business trip was successful and they managed to expand their branches to the North as well, which would require them frequent trips to Aurora Falls, which was the biggest human settlement in our country. It seemed that there were human investors who were eager to expand their businesses to the South, which would benefit them a lot since their franchises were mostly nonexistent around here. It was a day to celebrate, which the Chois were really good at doing. I knew theyâd smuggle in some really expensive champagne tonight to the bonfire, after all, they did everything with grandeur.
My parents had been lounging around the front porch when the Chois's expensive SUV pulled up in front of our humble abode, my motherâs face had lit up like a Christmas tree as she came to welcome me home, and the Chois as well. After quick hugs and kisses, the Chois were off and I was left with my parents, who were smiling from ear to ear.
âLook at you!â My father had said as he engulfed me in a bear hug and spun me around, making me giggle into his chest, âYouâre radiating, what are they feeding you at the Academy?â
âMrs. Namâs cooking is really delicious, but I donât think itâs because of the food.â I giggled as my feet had finally touched the ground. My mother stood to the side, my duffle bag already in her hand as she shook her head at our antics, âI suspect itâs the clear air and the vast forest grounds.â
âYouâre still running on your own?â My motherâs eyebrows had furrowed as I walked up to her, throwing an arm around her shoulders as we headed for the house. The rumble of a loud engine reached our ears as we took the steps up the porch. I knew whose car it was, it was hard to miss when nobody elseâs car engine was as loud as the Song twins, âMrs. Song told me her sons had proposed to go on runs with you, but youâve turned them down each time. I know weâre all still adjusting to living in a pack, but having company on your runs is actually very healthy for you and your wolf, my dear.â
I wished to correct my mother that it had been Mingi who had proposed to come on runs with me, no mention of Yunho. We had crossed paths once while we were both out hunting during a full moon and because my cramps had been really bad that day, Mingi was nice enough to remain a respectable distance away and guide me for the night, keeping an eye out for other not-so-kind predators. There were months when my shifting went a little haywire during the full moon, my senses dull and my bones all miss shaped. Again, the doctors hadnât found anything wrong with me, they suspected it was due to my early blooming, which wasnât helping much. As we reached the front door, my father already opening it for us, the honk of a loud car made us turn back and look towards the orange Jeep, its windows rolled down, and the younger Song siblings cooped up in the backseat.
âHi, Mr. and Mrs. Byun!â Mingi called from the driverâs seat, all smiles as his glasses looked to be slipping off his nose. Wooyoung was just as enthusiastic as he leaned out the window, the car going at a slow pace now that they had almost reached their house.
âSee you tonight, right?!â Wooyoung shouted as he grinned widely, pointing specifically at me, âCanât leave Sannie on his own, right?!â
âRight.â My voice didnât have much force to it as my eyes stalled on Yunho, who was facing the windshield, his jaw set tight as he looked at Mingi and said something inaudible. I released a quiet sigh as we stepped through the doorway, my parents sharing a laugh at the siblings' antics. I tried to ignore the lump in my throat, the fire in my veins, the ache of my heart. Yunhoâs hurtful words were still too fresh in my mind, the look in his eyes and the vivid image of his body a constant image in the front of my mind. It wasnât surprising that I was still thinking about him. We had encountered each other just last night, after all, but I wished we never had. It was hard to ignore the yearning, especially when we were back at home, forced to visit the Songs weekly since our parents had grown so close with each other. I was happy for them, donât misunderstand me, but I wished the Song parents stopped blaming my âlonelinessâ on being an only child, thus forcing me to constantly hang out with their children. I didnât have any issues with the five of them, per se, but I hardly found anything I had in common with themâminus Yunho, since he wouldnât even look my way, let alone have a conversation with me.
âYou should tell San to sleep over tonight, maybe his parents can stay too!â My fatherâs words distracted me from my thoughts as I headed for the stairs, eager to fall into my comfortable bed, no Yeri to disturb my peace this time.
âHoney, they had barely returned home, let the Chois enjoy having their son home for at least three more days.â My mother gently chastised my father as she headed up the stairs after me, my duffle bag still in her hand, âHeâll sleep over before they go back to the Academy.â
âFine, but I found a really cool book about genealogy, Iâm sure heâd love reading through it.â
âSure, honey, sure.â My mother and I shared an amused look which made us chuckle, my fatherâs mumbled words blending into the background as he was headed for his study room, surely eager to get back to whatever book he was reading this time, âGet some sleep before lunch, Mama Song asked us to head over before they set the bonfire, sheâs making a new mushroom stew recipe sheâd like us to try.â
âYeah, okay,â I mumbled as I fell face-first into my pillows, groaning loudly as my muscles finally eased up, my body cocooned in the safety of my own scent. Finally, a little peace of mind.
But that peace of mind didnât last for long. The Song household was buzzing with life and laughter even before the other members of our community had started joining the bonfire. The mushroom stew was beyond delicious, and if I wasnât too shy, I wouldâve asked for a second plate but decided I could sneak in sometime during the evening and have a second plate, I knew Mrs. Song wouldnât mind since she was generous like that. Lunch went surprisingly well, mostly with everyone talking over each other, especially Wooyoung, Yeri, and Mr. Song, but that was to be expected. The Songs were very eccentric people and their household had always been chaotic. However, what did take me by surprise was the presence of a newcomer, someone who wasnât a werewolf. Her hair was dark and fell in long curls, her skin pale and her eyes very sharp, her lips the colour of blood and her stance very elegant. If I hadnât known better, I wouldâve thought she hated us, but anytime Mingi looked at her sheâd smile at him and her heartbeat would waver whenever he laughed. It wasnât hard to guess that she was the Petrova heir, the youngest vampire of the Baeâs. Knowing so much about them, thanks to my father, sitting at a table with her now felt surreal.
She didnât look like she wanted to talk much, but when my fatherâs innocent curiosity got the best of him and he started asking questions, she seemed rather pleased that she could gloat about her family. Her tone was sharp and she spoke rather straightforwardly, yet it was somehow obvious she didnât mean bad. She was a peculiar person and I felt immense respect for her, no real reason as to why, maybe itâs because I thought she was very cool. I wasnât brave enough to speak to her, so, besides stolen glances and a few shared glances, no words passed between the two of us. Besides, she was an amazing distraction to preoccupy my busy mind since conveniently Yunho and I ended up sitting next to each other. His body was warm, his scent almost tangible, and with every bite I took of my stew, it felt as if Yunhoâs sandalwood scent was deep in my throat, forcing me to gulp down copious amounts of water as if I was sitient all the time. Yunho sat rigidly next to me, his body mostly turned away from me and facing Dahyun, his youngest sister, who looked absent-minded as she played with her fork, occasionally staring at Mingi if he made the vampire girl laugh. She carried Mingiâs scent and a bite mark was visible on her nape, it wasnât hard to guess what she and Mingi were. Mates.
Thankfully, after lunch was over, San shortly arrived too and I could escape from the Song family, from Yunho, walking around the back garden as we searched for timber that would be good for the bonfire. Wooyoung, of course, came to join us and Dahyun was quick to do so too, with Mingi and Yunho busy setting up the back garden as our parents all helped. The vampire girl was busy in the kitchen, apparently, she could bake really yummy muffins, so she was busy doing just that. Once everything was set and people were coming over, Wooyoung sneaked off to bring us cans of beer, San cheering as we all uncapped ours, clinking them together loudly. The cold sparkling drink burned my parched throat as I wolfed it down, making San chuckle as Wooyoung was busy checking his friendâs free hand for splinters. I said nothing as a blush covered Sanâs cheeks, his eyes fond, as Wooyoung fussed about his friend.
âMom said sheâd leave us a little bit of champagne,â San grinned as he switched the hand holding his can of beer, Wooyoungâs eyebrows furrowed as his fingers gently traced Sanâs free palm, âItâll be in the highest cupboard.â
âOnly Mingi and Yunho can reach that high, though,â Wooyoung mumbled with a pout, still holding onto Sanâs hand despite being done with his inspection. I chuckled as San gave Wooyoung a look, his chest almost puffing out more.
âAre you sure about that?â He raised a straight eyebrow, leaning closer to Wooyoungâs face. I watched with intrigue as Wooyoung slightly caved in on himself, gulping almost nervously. His heartbeat remained steady, though, so I couldnât tell for sure whether Sanâs proximity made him nervous, âWho got that stuck ball off the basket last time, I donât reckon it was your brothers?â
âWell,â Wooyoung huffed, averting his eyes when San only leaned closer. I almost grinned when Wooyoungâs heart very loudly skipped a beat, but his eyebrows furrowed as he swiftly straightened himself, giving San a pointed look, âYou can jump high. And I suppose you have strong arms, it was sheer luck, really.â
Before the two could start bickering, I chuckled and reached a hand out towards Wooyoung, âWonât you check my hands for blisters too?â
Wooyoung seemed a little bit too eager to scurry off the log he was sharing with San as he kneeled in front of me, taking my hand into his. I chuckled and looked at San as I took a swing of my beer, Wooyoungâs warm fingers tracing lines as he hummed under his breath, turning my palm over, âYou have pretty hands, Y/N.â
âThank you,â I said, then switched my hands as Wooyoung continued to inspect them, a flush appearing on his face when San reached out to pet his hair since it was tousled by the wind earlier. It had settled now into a pleasant evening breeze. The chatter, music, and laughter coming from around the bonfire felt nice, warm. As I gazed at the fire, I was greeted by the sight of werewolves cosying up and sharing drinks and stories. Iâve never had this in the big city, it felt really nice to be surrounded by creatures that had your back even if they didnât know you well.
Wooyoung chuckled, his finger digging into my skin, right underneath my pinkie, âYunho has the same exact moles here too, on the same hand as well.â
My body froze as Sanâs eyebrows raised, he quickly scurried off the log to join Wooyoung crouching in front of me. I tried to keep the smile on my face, but the taste in my mouth soured as I looked down at the three moles that Iâve always had on my left palm, right underneath my pinkie finger.
âReally?â San sounded surprised and excited at the same time, âAre you sure?â
âOf course,â Wooyoung scoffed as he gave San a side glance, âHeâs my brother, I know him. Heâs always said that they look like stars. Before our sisters were born, heâd said they represented him, Mingi, and me. Of course, the closest to the one he called himself was Mingi because they are twins and blah blah, sometimes this twin thing gets old.â
âYouâre just jealous.â San teased Wooyoung as my eyes were stuck on the three moles, something in my stomach dropping. Iâve always said the three dots looked like stars and represented my family: my mom, my father, and me. Weâd always be there for each other, close by, looking over one another. Wooyoung and Sanâs voices drowned out as they started bickering about whether Mingi and Yunho had a deeper bond than any other werewolf due to them being twins, but my mind was spinning with this new piece of information. It suddenly felt wrong having those moles there, especially since Yunho didnât want to have to do anything with me. I gulped, retracting my hand from Wooyoungâs hold as I stood abruptly, taking the two guys off guard.
âUhm, Iâll just see what my parents are up to if you donât mindâŠâ I knew my scent had soured, Sanâs furrowed eyebrows told me he had realised something had upset me. But I just smiled and patted Wooyoungâs head before I walked around my friends, my heart slightly racing as the chilly evening seemed to bite at my nose, making me sniff harder and harder by the time I reached my parents, who were talking to the Academyâs Principal, Mr. Kim.
âOh, Miss Byun,â The Principal was the first one to spot me, and he smiled as my parents beckoned me even closer, âI was just complimenting you. Ever since Miss Yeri started rooming with you, her grades not only went up but sheâs been better behaved too.â
âOh, uhm, thatâs great.â I tried to even out my expression, praying that my parents wouldnât question my souring mood, âI didnât do much, just asked her to follow some rules. She also asked if I could sometimes help her out with her homework.â
âFascinating,â The Principal muttered as my parents looked at me proudly, making me feel a little bit shy, âI knew letting her room with Miss Son wasnât too smart, those two gave me more headache than the ruling board does on the daily.â
The Principalâs comment had my parents laughing, the shared glance between them amused, and suddenly I realised Iâd never have that. I would never have a mate that stood by my side, cosied up to me, spoke to me about whatever insanity crossed their minds, no shared understanding glances, no cheek or neck nuzzles, no unbreakable bond, nothing. My jaw tightened as the air spiked with sandalwood and vanilla, and I hoped it would pass by before the tears could spring into my eyes. But the Universe seemed to be working against me today because the Principal caught Yunhoâs bicep before he could stalk off, his expression soft and his eyes questioning. He hadnât noticed my presence yet, because I knew his round eyes would turn harsh and his pouty lips would pull into a straight line the second he noticed me. His outgrown hair was tousled by the breeze, long strands framing his face handsomely as they brushed against his nape, some strands darker than the others.
âMr. Song, fancy seeing you.â The Principal patted Yunhoâs strong back with a proud smile, âI was just telling Mr. and Mrs. Byun how your little sister has been improving both academically and behaviour-wise too.â
âOh,â Yunhoâs pale cheeks flushed with colour as he slightly bowed, I could see my parents practically fawn over him. He was handsome, too handsome, everyone around here was in love with him whether they wanted to be or not, âI know my siblings give you a lot of headaches, but if it helps, youâll have to deal with fewer of us after this year.â
The Principal laughed as he shook his head, âBetween you and me, Iâd rather have you and Mingi attend the Academy for five more years than your younger siblings, although Dahyun is a sweet girl despite being odd.â
Even if the comment wasnât well received by Yunho, his left eye twitched slightly and his smile looked a bit forced all of a sudden, he just chuckled and bowed his head again, âTheyâll mature with time, Mingi and I did too.â
âIndeed, that is true.â Then the Principal was suddenly facing me, and I noticed the way Yunhoâs eyes slightly widened as if he actually hadnât noticed me standing just a few feet away, âYouâd be surprised to hear that Yunho was unstoppable as a child, we had to sedate him more than once during his runs. He also struggled to shift back until he became ten, isnât that peculiar?â
Before Yunho could interject, however, my mother spoke up to my horror, âMy daughter still struggles to shift, being an early bloomer is really straining.â
âIâm not an early bloomer, though.â Yunhoâs tone was a bit harsher, but I bet nobody noticed but me as his eyes bore into mine, his face void of any emotion. I sighed and looked away, trying to push the image of his exposed collarbones due to his unbuttoned shirt out of my head. His cheeks seemed unnaturally pink, he mustâve used some blush before coming down for the bonfire.
âSometimes when matesââ
âI think we should leave the younglings alone, no?â My father cut the Principal off with a charming smile as I looked at him, slightly taken aback. Nobody knew Yunho and I were supposed to be mates, not even Yunho, I hadnât told a soul. I doubt my father knows, he mustâve misinterpreted Yunho and my exchange as I winced and he just cleared his throat, sounding uncomfortable. Then, without wasting another second, my father was rushing us towards the bonfire, my mother laughing at something the Principal said as I turned to look at my dad. He was smiling gently and winked when he caught my stare, making me question whether he truly was oblivious to whether I had already found my mate or not. Yunho and I marched towards the bonfire wordlessly, and I flinched when I felt his warm knuckles brush against the back of my hand, but almost as if it was a fragment of my imagination, Yunho was beelining it towards a log on which a girl I didnât know sat, next to her Yeri with a bored expression on her face.
âYunho!â The unknown girl called out, making grabby hands at him. I watched as Yunho grinned and sat next to her, leaning into her space as the girl instantly flushed. My stomach coiled as I averted my eyes towards the fire, feeling its warmth slowly seep into my bones, but my muscles didnât ease up, they remained tense.
âDid you miss me, baby?â I tried not to whine as my wolf told me to pounce on the girl and drag her into the forest and show her what happens to those who touch Yunho, but I wouldâve looked completely insane if I had done that. Yunho wasnât done speaking, however, and I felt eyes on me which made my skin crawl, âI got held up, but Iâm all yours now.â
I tried not to feel sick as I chanced a glance towards Yunho, who was looking at me with a smirk. I could feel tears threatening to appear in my eyes, I didnât want to look pathetic, however, Yeri seemed to save me from the shame, âDude, did you get me a beer?â
âOf course, I did.â Yunho chuckled, finally looking away from me, âJust donât tell mom or Wooyoung.â
âI wonât, chill out.â Yeri scoffed as she opened her can of beer, grinning to herself in triumph, âMy room is yours tonight, then.â
They shared a look and I released a shaky breath as I had decided that I needed a moment away from everything. I knew everyone could smell my spiked scent and hear my heart thudding in an uneven rhythm, I didnât want them staring at me, so I quickly hurried inside the house and headed for the kitchen hoping it was deserted. Maybe Iâd find that bottle of champagne San was talking about and help myself to it, I knew nobody would mind. The kitchen was dark when I stepped through the archway, so I quickly felt around the wall for the light switch and gasped when light flooded the kitchen. When I got too into my head, I completely missed other scents or heartbeats around me, otherwise the vampire girl wouldnât have taken me off guard. She tilted her head and raised an amused eyebrow as she nibbled on a cherry.
âDid I scare you?â She asked, her tone still cold, âI thought werewolves have heightened senses too.â
âUh, we do.â I muttered as I walked further inside the kitchen, âI was distracted.â
âWhy is that?â The girl asked, looking curious as her expression slightly shifted.
âNo reason.â I lied as I opened a cupboard and grabbed a tall glass.
âAre you drinking wine?â She looked surprised as I walked to the cupboard I knew the champagne was hidden in, âCan I have some too?â
I paused and considered her question for a second, then shrugged, âSure, but itâs champagne.â
âGood, I like that more.â She smirked as she grabbed a tall glass too, then approached me. She was cold, she lacked the warmth werewolves emanated, but her scent was oddly not exactly hers. I studied her from my peripheral as I got on my tiptoes and grabbed the bottle of champagne. I had been around the Songs for long enough to know them by scent, and she very strongly reeked of Mingi. There was no further information needed to know they really were mated if only someone failed to notice her bite mark. The vampire girl said nothing as I opened the bottle of champagne, mindful of leaving some for San and Wooyoung as I poured the bubbly drink for the vampire before for myself. I could feel her eyes on me, studying me closely, and then she hummed, leaning her hip against the counter, âI might not be a werewolf, but you absolutely stink. Donât get me wrong, all werewolves do besides Mingi, but your scent is very bothersome right now.â
I gulped, feeling my cheeks heating up as I placed the bottle of champagne back into the cupboard. Getting told that you stink certainly wasnât very nice, but I knew firsthand that werewolves had distinctive scents, perhaps vampires werenât too fond of it. Not that I knew much about vampires, there were few in Colourful River and they seemed to frolic more with the humans since they were their blood bags. Still, her comment only worsened my mood as I handed her one of the glasses, trying not to grimace.
âSorry, Iâll try to keep it down next time,â I muttered over the rim of my glass, and then I took a bigger gulp than necessary. The vampire girl watched me with a raised eyebrow as she took a small sip, savouring the sweet taste unlike me. I didnât like the amused glint in her eyes, it felt as if she was looking down on me, but I really wasnât up for a confrontation right now.
âAs much as I would love to insult you right now,â My eyes widened as the vampire girl sighed, âOver the past year I learned that when your scent turns sour, or just becomes really unbearable to me, it means that youâre upset. So, I didnât mean to further upset you, Iâm just not very good at understanding how werewolves function.â
I chuckled under my breath as my next words escaped before I could stop myself, âFunny you say that when youâre surrounded by werewolves only right now. Why do you even hang around us if you canât stand us?â
Despite expecting harsh words as an answer to my jab, the vampire looked dejected as she leaned back into the counter, sighing loudly as she averted her eyes, âIf it wasnât for Mingi and I beingâmates, then I certainly wouldnât be here. When I was young, I had a really bad encounter with a rogue wolf and I have hated you all ever since, but I canât deny the pull I feel towards Mingi, itâs weird, but itâs there. And when I had tried ignoring it, it had hurt the both of us, so Iâm here now, trying to still embrace the fact that now Iâm part of this pack that Iâve hated my whole life and of the family thatâs been getting on my nerves ever since they moved to Nocturnal Parade.â
I hummed in surprise and took another sip of my drink, now suddenly understanding why the Song twins had reacted with disdain when I had brought up the Petrova family a year ago, I assume she and Mingi werenât together yet then.
âIt mustâve been hard accepting Mingi, then.â The girlâs cold exterior slowly melted away as she looked at me with surprise. I suppose she had been judged by many for her prejudices, but didnât everyone have some? I couldnât completely blame her for them, âSeeing a werewolf and a vampire together isnât uncommon, but I havenât heard of them being mated before. Do you mind if I ask how that happened?â
The vampire chuckled as she turned her head towards the window, gazing out as she took another sip of her champagne, âWe were drunk and had sex. I, apparently, bit Mingi where his scent gland is and triggered his imprinting. It feels weird to think about it, that maybe we wouldâve never ended up together otherwise, but I donât think thatâs true. I think I had always liked Mingi, my hatred had just gotten in the way of me realising my true feelings for him.â
I hummed, gaining a new perspective on their relationship. I have heard bits and pieces from Yeri, even Wooyoung sometimes, but Mingiâs younger sister was mostly speaking ill of the Petrova girl. Yeri didnât like the vampire at all and never failed to go on angry rants about how much she wanted to rip Mingiâs mate apart, but she couldnât because sheâd been accepted by the family, so the vampire girl was now untouchable. Speaking to the vampire, however, wasnât as awful as Yeri made me think it would be. She faced me again, her head tilted as she looked at me with a curious expression on her face.
âWhatâs your story? I donât think we had spoken before, right?â She asked as I shook my head, plastering on a small smile.
âWe moved here a year ago, the big city just wasnât for us anymore.â I shrugged, then traced the edge of the counter with my finger as I averted my eyes from the vampire, âNothing is interesting about me, I think Iâm just a regular, boring, werewolf. I did make a friend, though, itâs Choi San, if you know him?â
âOf course, I do,â The vampire scoffed, rolling her eyes as if hearing my best friendâs name was irritating to her, âWooyoung never shuts up about him, if I wouldnât have known better, Iâd suspect heâs in love with San.â
That caught my attention as I perked up, subconsciously leaning closer to the vampire. It felt as if she was wearing a patch of Mingiâs familiar scent, it was almost endearing if it wouldnât have reminded me of the fact that Iâd never have this with Yunho, âReally? You think Wooyoung is in love with San?â
The girl chuckled, looking at me with a smirk, âI wouldnât want to assume such a thing, but you must know Wooyoung is very irritating, so he only settles down when I threaten to tell San heâs always gushing about him behind his back. That must mean something, no?â
I bit my lower lip, buzzing with excitement at the prospect of Wooyoung returning Sanâs feelings. However, Iâd have to trade forward with this information very smartly, I didnât want to ruin something that apparently had so much potential. I only wanted to see San happy with the person he loved with his whole might.
âI hope it means something,â I muttered into my glass as I took another sip, making the vampire girlâs eyes gain a mischievous glint. I hoped she wouldnât say anything that would set back the two boys' relationship, but maybe I had finally gained an insider who could help me give tips to San to push their relationship a step forward.
âInteresting,â She mumbled as she took another sip as well, raising an eyebrow, âWhat about you, though? I know youâre rooming with Yeri, for which you have my condolences, but youâre connected to this family in more ways, right?â
I felt my palms sweat all of a sudden, âWhat do you mean?â
âI have sharp eyes, and very sensitive hearing. Whatâs between you and Yunââ
âNothing, absolutely nothing.â I wouldâve looked guilty even to a newcomer by how quick I was to shut down the vampireâs question and assumption, she hadnât even fully spelled Yunhoâs name yet. I gulped, feeling my heartbeat pick up, then I averted my eyes and hoped she would just drop the subjectâŠbut she didnât.
âItâs not my place to say what Iâm about to say next, but be careful.â My eyebrows furrowed as I dared take a peek at her from between my eyelashes, âThe Song twins arenât bad creatures, they really arenât, but Yunho isâŠa jackass, simply put. Heâs dated Seulgi, my friend, and things were really messy between them. I hear now heâs messing around with a girl who finished the Academy last year, I just donât want to see you end up like Seulgi. You seem like a genuine werewolf, kind-hearted too, I would hate to see Yunho destroy it all. Itâs not my place at all, I know, but maybe just let it be? Maybe itâs better if youâre not meant to be, you know?â
But we are meant to be, I wanted to say it, I wanted to snap at her, but she knew better. If she could see it, a complete outsider, then who was I to correct her? She had known Yunho for longer than me, she probably didnât have any bad intentions by warning me, but it still hurt. I gulped and downed the last of my champagne, knowing that my scent had soured once again. I came here to escape everything that was Yunho, yet, he was the subject once again. I hated it, but I couldnât do anything about it. As long as the both of us lived in this town, Yunho would somehow always be the subject, he was too popular and well-liked by the others.
âNo, youâre right, Iââ I paused when I realised I sounded shaky, âI donât even like him, donât worry. I know the type of guy he is, I wonât mingle with him. Iâm glad you found Mingi, his scent is all over you, by the way.â
The vampire blushed all of a sudden, it surprised me, but I was glad I had successfully diverted the subject from Yunho. She had a fond look on her face as she tried to save herself with a loud scoff, downing her champagne quickly, âMingi isnât too possessive, but since I donât have a scent as you guys do, heâs scenting me all the time. It was annoying at the beginning, but he wouldnât stop, so, I just had to accept the fact that everyone would know I was with him now. Itâs kind of endearing, but donât let him know, please! His ego is already through the roof.â
I chuckled, wondering what she was talking about because Mingi was one of the nicest creatures I had ever met. We werenât very close, but he always stopped to talk to me if we crossed paths in the hallways, and during the summer break, heâd even come over sometimes with baked goods, eager to discuss whatever book heâd lately read. I liked Mingi, he was nice to me and my family, sometimes perhaps too nice. Silence settled between the vampire girl and me, so I decided it was my time to excuse myself and join San and Wooyoung in the back garden once again. Surprisingly, I felt more at ease after speaking to the Petrova girl, I had always thought she was intimidating and too cold, but she was a lot nicer than I have been told. I cleared my throat and pointed towards the archway, an awkward smile making it onto my face.
âIâll head back outside if you donât mind.â But as I took off, she called out for me to stop.
âWait,â The vampire cleared her throat and looked a bit embarrassed as she dug into her pocket, her lips pursed as she avoided making eye contact, âSo, uhm, Dahyun forced me today to make some shitty bracelets with her and, honestly, I canât give this shit to any of my friends, they arenât werewolves.â
I quirked an eyebrow as she took her hand out of her pocket, then extended it towards me without meeting my eyes. Her palm opened and a simple, but pretty, brown leather bracelet sat in it. I chuckled, reaching for it with an amused smile. The bracelet was braided and it had a cute wood wolf charm, it looked like it was howling upon closer inspection. I was just about to make a playful comment about it when I noticed a very similar bracelet peeking out from underneath the sleeve of her blouse. The only difference was that the leather was a lighter brown than mine, so, I swallowed down my comment and instead looked at her with a big smile.
âThank you!â It oddly felt like a friendship offer too, but I didnât want to get too ahead of myself. Maybe she just genuinely didnât want to give it to her other friends, maybe she was embarrassed to do so, âItâs really pretty.â
âWhatever,â The vampire grumbled as she lowered her hand, fidgeting with her bracelet absentmindedly, âThat little animal forced me toânot that Iâm calling Dahyun an animal, or other werewolves, Iâwell.â
I laughed quietly as I wore the bracelet, looking at it for a longer second before I grinned at the Petrova girl, âDonât worry, I get what youâre saying. We are animals, after all, and since youâve already brought that up, please be a little nicer to Yeri, I canât keep listening to her whine about you.â
âI hate that brat.â The vampire scowled, but quickly caught herself, âI mean, sure, Iâll try to be nicerâŠsort of.â
I chuckled and raised my hand to wriggle my wrist, the wolf charm moving around, âFriends, maybe?â
The vampire seemed to think for a second before she smiled, a real smile that reached her sharp eyes too, âYeah, friends.â
I felt rather happy as I left the kitchen, fulfilled even, that I had managed to befriend another creature, and this was the Petrova, well now Bae, heir on top of it all. It made me feel excited as I hurried out of the house, planning to tell San and even Wooyoung, but I almost collided with two creatures once out on the porch. The girl's giggles became quiet as my wide eyes stared up into Yunhoâs equally surprised ones, but then, his grip tightened around the girlâs waist and he was suddenly manoeuvring themselves around me, a dark look crossing Yunhoâs features. I gulped, my heart racing as I heard the girl mutter something about me to Yunho, and then both were laughing. It was fine, I was alright. Yunho was free to do however he pleased, he didnât owe me anything, no explanations or promises. But my wolf howled inside my mind, a harsh ache suddenly hitting my insides, freezing me into my spot for a second as I gasped for air. I wondered if this exact feeling was the same as the vampire and Mingi had experienced when they tried ignoring their bond. If yes, it made me wonder how was I strong enough to still be going and acting as if Yunho wasnât my mate, as if his ignorance wasnât slowly killing me on the inside. All I wanted was to crumble to the ground and let the sobs wreck my body, but instead, I tried to clear my mind and find Sanâs scent to cosy up with him, burry my pain deep down, and revel in the safety my best friend had always offered me.
But as I finally reached my best friend, he was sitting by the bonfire with a very drunk Wooyoung stuck to his side, arms around Sanâs middle as his head was pressed into Sanâs collarbones. We made eye contact and Sanâs eyes were sparkling with elation and something else as he gestured with his head subtly at Wooyoung, so I knew I couldnât bother them. I didnât want to ruin their moment, I could basically smell just how happy, and drunk, San was. I wouldâve been a terrible friend if I had walked up to them just to mop around without telling them the real reason for my displeasure, so I decided to just head home for the night. The champagne had left my blood buzzing, and even though I wasnât tipsy, I knew how my night would end. Iâd bury myself deep underneath my pillows and blanket and cry myself to sleep, letting out my wails since nobody would be able to hear me. My parents wouldnât return for a few more hours, so I could just wallow in misery as loudly as I wanted to. But to leave, I had to grab my jacket first, which was in Wooyoungâs room courtesy to San who had thrown our jackets somewhere on his bed.
The house was silent as I made my way back inside, the kitchen dark once again, and since I couldnât hear a second heartbeat, I knew the vampire girl had left, probably, to find Mingi. I realised I was fiddling with the wolf charm as I made my way up the stairs, my body covered in goosebumps for no reason. I had been inside this house multiple times, I knew where everything was, but for some reason, my intuition was telling me to turn around and just go home without my jacket. My wolf was basically whimpering in my mind, trying to convince me to turn around as I stepped off the last stair, ears picking up on a faint noise. The hallway wasnât too narrow but it was long, and Wooyoungâs room was next to the upstairs bathroom, across from Yeriâs. The scents were so mingled up here that I couldnât tell whether anyone was upstairs, so I just hoped I didnât run into anyone because I wasnât capable of conversing right now. I felt spent, upset, and heartbroken at the same time. I knew this would happen, Iâd get ignored by Yunho once again, but it still stung each time it happened, I thought I had gotten used to it. Maybe I was reacting this badly because he had insulted me last night as well, and now his actions from tonight were also bugging me.
The faint noises got louder the closer I got to Wooyoungâs room, and with slight terror, I realised they sounded like hushed whispers and muffled moans. Glancing towards Yeriâs room, the door had been left slightly ajar, and despite dread filling my stomach, I found myself walking towards it, eyebrows furrowed once I picked up on a foreign citrusy scent. That, however, was the least of my worries as Yunhoâs intoxicating sandalwood and vanilla scent carried through the air in intense pumps, twisting something in my lower stomach, and making my mouth go dry. It was so intoxicating that I found myself creeping towards the door, my breath baited and my hands slightly trembling as my wolf whined at me to barge inside and let Yunho have us, ravish us. But the small crack left by the door being ajar was enough for me to see inside the dim room, making my heart drop in seconds. The girl Yunho had been hanging out with all night was on her knees in front of Yunho as he sat on the edge of the bed, leaning back on his hands as his mouth hung open, eyebrows furrowed, and eyes squeezed shut as low moans left his swollen lips. I couldnât pry my eyes away from Yunhoâs face despite the sudden urge to cry as my wolf howled loudly, making my blood boil now that I knew for sure others could have Yunho like this. At a particularly high-pitched moan, Yunhoâs eyes snapped open and found mine through the crack of the door, making me gasp loudly as I jumped back, feeling disgusted and full of rage at the same time. It wasnât fair of Yunho to constantly push me away, whether he knew I was his mate or not, and it wasnât fair that he could easily mess around with others while I was forced to suffer and watch him from afar. I didnât stall any longer, I was out of the house before I could hear more of the sounds they were making, Yunhoâs strong scent burning my throat even the next morning.
           The Spring Break passed by in a frenzy, and I had barely gotten any rest while I was home for the week. Every invite to the Songs I had turned down, disgusted at the thought of facing Yunho after everything. I didnât want to see him, I didnât want to hear him, I didnât want to smell him. I had made up my mind. If he didnât want me, I wouldnât want him either anymore. I have yearned enough after someone Iâd never have, so, I decided whatâs enough is enough. I knew the change wouldnât happen overnight, especially when my wolf snarled at me anytime I pushed the thought of Yunho away, whining loudly whenever he came up in a conversation. My wolf wasnât happy with my decision, but I was the one in control, and I was done being hurt all the time. I missed the serenity I once had before meeting Yunho and the rest of the Songs, but if finally living the life my parents had always wished for came with the price of finding an unrequited mate, then I could live with that for now. Perhaps if I went far enough from here then the bond would somehow finally completely break. I could only hope that was the case and I wouldnât get somehow incurably sick, Iâve heard of it happening before, and it scared me.
Today had been a long day, I felt tired and my back muscles were aching from having been sitting all day long, my brain sore from having been paying close attention in my classes. My notebooks were filled with notes, there was not a second to rest now that we were back at the Academy. San and I had wandered on our own paths sometime during the afternoon, his classes different from mine, besides, I knew he liked working out before going for his run, where heâd most probably be joined by Wooyoung. He had texted me asking whether I wanted to join the two of them, but I had politely declined. San knew I liked being on my own, so he never pushed me if I wasnât feeling up to it. I always enjoyed my runs more on the Academy grounds than back at home, because here the forest was large and I rarely ran into other wolves while being out there. At home, the boundaries were clearly fenced in, to keep us from wandering too far into the Haunted Woods and getting lost. Other creatures than us, more ferocious ones, lurked deep in the forest, and some of us from Nocturnal Parade had never returned once they ventured too far in.
I knew I couldnât go back to the shed, especially not now, out of fear of running into Yunho. And as if the Universe was laughing at me today, the way my wolf started purring before the scent even hit my nose shouldâve been a clear sign to turn around and go the other way towards the campus, on the backroads where not many liked walking. It was a good spot for the Fae to hide away and drink in natureâs powers, so most of us kept clear of it to offer them privacy. I knew they wouldnât mind if I stumbled upon them, and Iâd rather face their wrath than run into Yunho right now. As I rounded the corner, I stopped walking just in time to avoid crashing into Yunhoâs larger body. He gasped and pressed a hand against his chest, gulping almost too loudly. I didnât look at him as I averted my eyes, nor said anything despite my wolf trying to nudge me towards Yunho. I just tried to step around him and hurry towards the entrance. However, something very unexpected happened. Yunhoâs low voice sounded unsure, almost, a little breathy as well.
âAre you headed for a run right now?â My body froze upon hearing Yunhoâs question, and I tried to fight every particle of my body from stepping closer to him when his sandalwood scent called out to me. It was deeper, more earthy than ever before, and my wolf was purring so loudly it echoed in my ears as if it were real.
âYes.â My answer was short, but before I could leave, Yunho followed up with another question.
âMay I join you?â He sounded more confident this time, I could feel his eyes on me as my eyebrows furrowed.
What? I gulped, trying to keep my heartbeat even as his question echoed in my mind. Why now? Why did he want to join me on my run all of a sudden? Why was he even talking to me? Why was he acknowledging me? Without even realising it, I had started fiddling with the wolf charm of my bracelet, finding courage as I raised my head and looked into his chocolate brown eyes.
âNo.â Yunhoâs face became blank as he gulped again, his left eye slightly twitching, âI donât like going on runs with others.â
Yunho was silent for another second as I raised my eyebrow at him, challengingly. What did he want? His tongue poked the inside of his cheek as he huffed, a cynical smile crossing his features, âI see.â
I hummed, fingers tightening around the charm as I was displeased with his reaction, but I didnât say anything as I nodded once, stepping around him this time to resume my walk. But, once again, Yunho spoke up before I could leave.
âHave you done the assignment? For our Literature class.â Just what was he on? My eyebrows furrowed again as I looked at him confused, Yunho slightly turned his body to face mine since I was standing next to him.
âYes, we were supposed to hand it in before the Spring Break.â I knew my tone was sharp as I deadpanned, but I couldnât help myself. Yunho had never spoken to me like this before, let alone asked about a run or an assignment. If he stumbled into me on accident, he wouldnât even apologise, so this whole interaction was bizarre, âWhy? Have you not done yours?â
âI have.â Yunhoâs eyes narrowed then, slowly trailing down my body until it stopped on my wrist. I shivered and hid my arm behind my back as if I had done something I wasnât allowed to, my wolf whispered at me that I was wearing something that hadnât always belonged to me, âAre youâdid Mingi give you something of his?â
Once again, what? I huffed, closing my eyes for a second as I could feel irritation seep through my body. It wasnât just my scent souring, Yunhoâs sandalwood got replaced by the vanilla, which didnât smell as sweet as usual, âNo, why would he?â
But Yunho didnât answer as his jaw tightened, his eyes switching between mine before they fell back down to my wrist as if he were trying to see through the sleeve of my jacket. His long hair was tousled, almost as if he had been running his fingers through it too often, and his cheeks were covered in a coral blush and littered with fake freckles. His nails were painted yellow this time and they matched the neon yellow of his bomber jacket, which seemed to hide a purple mesh shirt underneath. A blue tie hung loosely around his neck, and his jeans had daisies stamped on his thighs. He looked amazing, even if peculiar, he made my wolf purr in a dreamy way that had me move slightly towards him, hoping that he hadnât noticed since he was still busy staring at my wrist, which I was still hiding behind my back.
âAre you lying to me right now?â Yunhoâs tone had turned a tad bit aggressive, and suddenly, I found him all up in my face, closing the distance between us with an alarming speed. My heart skipped a beat and my wolf leered at Yunhoâs actions, whispering sweet nothings into my ear, distracting me for a second from Yunhoâs sudden, and unwarranted, fury.
âWhat is your problem, Yunho?â Despite craving to touch him and nuzzle into the crook of his neck, I pushed through the sudden lustful haze and made my anger apparent. That seemed to catch Yunho off guard as his expression fell a bit, his eyebrows furrowing as he gulped, opening his mouth before he closed it again, seemingly not knowing how to answer my question. I scoffed, gave him a fierce glare, and ignored my wolfâs whimpers when I stepped back. Then I turned around to storm towards the exit. Where was all that audacity coming from?!
           It was a warm spring day, the sun had finally melted the last remnants of frostbite and dew, yet most students were cooped up in the Study Hall or Library, busy catching up with the projects and assignments they had procrastinated on so far. Perhaps going to the Library wouldâve been a smarter choice since the cacophony of the grand room distracted me more than once from my coursework. Midterms were right around the corner and everyone was squeezing in study time even on the weekends, determined to memorise as much material as possible. Thankfully, I wasnât behind in any of my classes but I still had to finish my Alchemy assignment, which was proving to be a headache. San was busy reading through his Anatomy notes and scribbling down even more information in his notebook as four different books were opened and strewn around him on the table. The sight made me chuckle, but I didnât bother San as I knew heâd get anxious if he wasnât able to finish checking all the materials he had proposed for himself to go over that day. He was quite literally a prodigy, yet he strived for even more perfection. I knew his whole future depended on his grades, but San was too smart for his own goodâŠacademically, at least.
As I jotted down another sentence about my failed experiment just from last night, Yeriâs chewing gum snapped loudly, making San flinch. He was so focused he didnât even look up, but his eyebrows slightly furrowed. I peeked at Yeri from above my laptop and raised an eyebrow at her when I realised, she had been staring at me already. She sighed as she placed her chin in her palm, grimacing as the chewing gum had stuck to the corner of her lips. I chuckled as she quickly got rid of it, and cleared her throat.
âDo you think youâll pass your Alchemy class this semester?â Yeriâs tone was deadpan, and it almost made me laugh. Maybe I shouldâve gone to the Library where we werenât allowed to speak much to each other, maybe then Yeri wouldâve spared me from her brutally honest questions.
âI sure hope so,â I muttered as I searched for the right formula on the internet, which was much faster than flipping through old pages of books, trying to find the answer for my magick elixir.
âWill you have to retake your class if you fail?â Yeri pressed, genuinely interested all of a sudden.
âNo, it would be the first time I failed this class, Iâd just retake the final exam,â I explained as San hummed next to me, highlighting something with green in the book he had borrowed from the Library. I was sure heâd get a good scrutinising from the librarian for that.
âHow many passes do I get before they fail me? Like the exams and shit.â
âWhich class are you failing, Yeri?â San spoke up with an amused tone as he sneaked a glance at her. I chuckled as I found the formula, then copied it into my notebook before putting it into my slideshow.
âDonât tell my brothers,â Yeri lowered her voice as she leaned over the table to be closer to San and me, âBut I might be failing Literature this year.â
âLiterature of all subjects?â San started laughing, prompting me to giggle as well. It was one of our easiest classes, trust Yeri to fail it. It seemed like the Songs were easily tricked by the easiest of tasks, Wooyoung was another prime example of that. He failed his Sports class last year, which shouldâve physically been impossible for a werewolfâŠeven all of the vampires had passed it.
âStop making fun of me,â Yeri pouted as she leaned back in her chair, crossing her arms over her chest, âNot everyone likes to readâI certainly donât.â
âWell, you should from now on, or youâll have to retake the whole class next year.â Yeriâs eyes widened at my inoffensive threat.
âWhatever,â She grumbled under her breath as her ears perked up, eyes looking around the room. Sanâs body seemed to tense too for a second before he relaxed, his ears tinged slightly red, âDonât wait for me to come back to our room tonight.â
âWhere are you going?â I felt like an older sister worrying about their younger sibling as my eyebrows furrowed. Yeri just rolled her eyes with a loud huff, eyes fixed on something behind me as she started smiling.
âIâm sleeping in Seungwannieâs room tonight.â I could hear footsteps approaching us rapidly.
âWhat about her roommate?â I asked as a familiar citrusy scent caught my attention, I didnât have to turn around to know who was coming.
âSheâll be fine, we like her.â I chuckled as Yeri winked, and then her eyes settled on San, or rather who stood now next to him. Before any of us could react, Wooyoung leaned down and pressed a fat kiss against Sanâs cheek, unleashing a heavy thundering of heartbeats. I ignored Sanâs heartbeats as I smiled at Wooyoung, who looked embarrassed by his actions, but he was grinning sheepishly as he lowered his head.
âHi!â He greeted us as San finally snapped out of his frozen state, giving Wooyoung a genuinely wide smile.
âHello, Woo,â I said as the younger pulled out a chair and sat in it, dismissing Yeri when she stuck her tongue out at her brother. Wooyoung rested his chin in his palm, head tilted as he looked at San.
âAre you still studying?â Wooyoungâs tone was impatient as Sanâs sigh was exasperated. I chuckled under my breath and went back to my slide show, looking over it for the nth time, âIâm so bored, San, you promised to come back to my room with me and entertain me.â
âOh, did you now, San?â Yeri grinned mischievously as she giggled, making Wooyoungâs eyes widen as he shot her an alarmed look. I watched the exchange wordlessly as Sanâs ears flushed a darker shade while he tried to make his body look even smaller as his wide shoulders hunched forward, âDoes that form of entertainment involveââ
âSong Yeri.â Mingiâs tone was authoritative as Yeriâs eyes widened, lips pressing into a straight line. How have I missed them approaching? Yunho was directly looking at me, his soft and chocolate brown eyes drilling into my forehead as I quickly looked away, once again busy with my PowerPoint presentation, âLeave your brother and San alone, must you always be such a menace?â
âIf they are idiotsâŠâ Yeri grumbled under her breath, and I watched curiously as both San and Wooyoung looked away, blushing and their hearts skipping a beat. I suppose it wonât take them much longer to finally come to terms that they like each other, Wooyoungâs been rather reactive lately around San, it was certainly fun to watch. What wasnât fun at all, however, was Yunhoâs unrelenting stare and his scrunched nose as he sniffed at the air.
âHello, Y/N.â I didnât expect the vampire girl to speak to me, she even had a smile on her face as my round eyes fell on her. It was a small smile, but it was there. I watched the people around us turn around surprised as they looked between me and the Petrova girl. I smiled and waved at her, the small wolf charm swishing around on my wrist. I didnât miss Yunhoâs eyes instantly falling onto it, nor the vampire girlâs satisfied smirk when Yeri scowled at her, âAre these rascals bothering you?â
âOh, not at all.â I chuckled, looking at San and Wooyoung as Yeri scoffed, but everyone just ignored her.
âWell, if you ever get bored of them, you can always join me and my friends.â The vampire girlâs eyes fell pointedly on Yeri and Wooyoung as Mingiâs grip tightened on her waist, âI know some creatures forget they cohabit a place with others whom they are constantly bothering and irritating.â
âOh, shove something up yourââ
âAlright!â Mingi chuckled, jumping in to de-escalate the situation, as always, âBefore this turns into another argument, my lovely girlfriend and I will be on our way.â
The Petrova girl winked at Yeri as she kissed Mingiâs cheek, and then the two turned and were off to a table where three creatures sat, all smiling at them except for one. She had long black hair, bangs that fell into her eyes, and a fierce glare as she stared at Yunho, then at me once she realised, I was looking at her.
âWonât you sit?â Wooyoung gestured towards the empty seat next to Yeri, and that seemed to snap Yunho out of whatever train of thought he seemed to be lost in. I chanced a glance at him before I went back to check for typos in my presentation, trying to ignore Yunhoâs vanilla scent spiking all of a sudden, so sweet it almost made me gasp. The last time it had been that sweet was when I caught him and that girl at the bonfire enjoying each other. I gulped and willed my wolf to remain silent as suddenly it took me everything to remain seated and not throw myself at Yunho, God, I so desperately wished to touch him and inhale him whole, but once again I had to remind myself that I had made a choice. No more Yunho, no more yearning, it was over. I deserved better, I could do better than this.
âNo, see you around.â Yunhoâs voice was strained as he quickly walked off, sitting alone at a large and almost empty table.
âThat was strange,â Wooyoung mumbled as Yeri hummed, turning around to stare at her brother with a frown.
âHeâs been acting strange ever since Y/N came to town,â I froze as Yeri faced me again, lips pursed, âNot that Iâm blaming you for my brotherâs behaviour, I just donât understand whatâs up with him. His scent gets stronger around you and heâs always moodier and snappier after he sees you, did you do something to him?â
I scoffed, rolling my eyes too as I closed my laptop, âRight, as if your brother had given me the chance to do something to him.â
Before anyone could question me, I stood and stormed towards the large bookcases lined closely to the exit, my muscles tense. Now that I had decided that I wanted nothing more to do with Yunho, my wolf had turned even more stubborn than it had been. I wanted to consume him, I wanted him to touch me and feel me up, it felt like I couldnât think or breathe in his presence. And when he wasnât around, my wolf whined and cried, begging me to find him and make him want us. But my will was stronger and I was determined to stay away even if it became harder and harder daily to go against my wolf. I wondered if Yunho felt the same way, if the thoughts of me were eating him up alive, if he was desperate to have me, if his wolf whined at him just like mine did. I sighed and closed my eyes, trying to ground myself into the present and push away all thoughts of the mate who didnât want me back. I wouldâve been struggling more half a year ago, but now it was second nature yearning after Yunho one second, then blocking him out the next one.
I still needed one more book for my presentation, the one that I could document myself from more in-depth as to why my experiment had failedâŠand I also shouldnât forget to cut the sound for the recording since Yeri is giggling and making fun of me in the background for almost ruining my desk. My fingers traced the sturdy shelf of the bookcase as I craned my neck back, reading the titles of the books, wondering whether I was in the right section. I was tall, but these bookcases were over two meters, so I might need a ladder if I find my book and itâs way too high up on the shelf. As I scanned the next aisle, I grinned in triumph when I read the title of the book I was searching for, Doâs and Donâts in Elixir Making, Alchemy, Level: kindergarten, by A. Turner. I chuckled under my breath at the blatant jab before I pushed myself up on my tiptoes, reaching forward and finding stability in the bookshelf when a sudden invasive warmth burned my nape, the scent of sandalwood forcing my eyes shut as I took a deep breath, my wolf purring when the sweet vanilla seemed to linger in my throat and oesophagus even after exhaling.
âIs this the one you were looking for?â Yunhoâs voice was low, too close to my ear, and I couldnât stop my heart from jolting in both fright and excitement. I whirled around, which was a mistake. There was barely any distance between our bodies as Yunho held the book in his big hand, long fingers curling around its old spine, his eyes soft, but his expression hardened. I gulped since my mouth felt dry, but the words didnât come to me as Yunho and I stood staring at each other. His grip tightened around the book and I finally looked at it, nodding hesitantly. He hummed and handed it over, our fingers brushing in the process and making my body lurch forward. Yunhoâs eyes widened, and I wondered if he had felt it too. The electricity, the low humming, the sudden tremble of my body at the fleeting touch, the depravation and desperation that was suddenly flowing through my veins, so close to claiming him as mine.
âYes.â My voice was steady despite my hammering heart, and the sweat that coated my brows. I cradled the book against my chest as if I was trying to protect myself from Yunho, protect my heart and mind too. But Yunho didnât look like he was about to move away, and I was too scared of making any moves, knowing that my legs would carry me straight in his arms, shamelessly at that. I couldnât let that happen, it wouldâve been humiliating. Yunhoâs lips parted as his eyebrows furrowed, long strands falling into his eyes, and he swiftly ran a hand through his hair as my eyes followed the motion. I gulped, wishing to do the same, but then Yunho exhaled and I felt my body lean towards him again, vanilla so sweet my mind was clouded with want.
âMingiâs girlfriend told me she had given you the sparse bracelet she and Dahyun had made.â I hadnât expected that, so I was curious where Yunho was going with this, âShe reeks of Mingi, so itâs no surprise your bracelet also reeks of Mingi.â
My eyebrows furrowed as I raised my hand, staring at it incredulously. Does it? I hadnât even noticed, how come? After all, Mingiâs scent had never been as invasive and constant as Yunhoâs. Bringing my wrist closer to my nose, I sniffed at it for a second, eyebrows furrowing when I noticed the faint hint of the earthy and cinnamon scent that was Mingi. It was barely even there, I wondered why Yunho was so sensitive towards it.
âOh, well, I can faintly smell it now that youâve pointed it out,â I muttered with a shrug as I lowered my arm, looking at Yunho with a questioning gaze. He bit his bottom lip and my eyes stayed there, wondering what the pink plush flesh would feel like underneath my teeth, whether Yunho would whine or growl if I were to sink my fangs into it and nip at the sensitive lip. But before my face could flush at the vivid image created in my mind, Yunho cleared his throat and took a small step towards me, making me press myself up against the bookcase. My body felt alive, my heart was racing, and my ears were ringing. I felt like I could do anything with Yunho around, as if I was untouchable.
âListen,â Yunho seemed to hesitate for a second before his eyes glazed over with conviction, his scent so overbearing that for a second it was all I could focus on, and his racing heart, âI had never meant to assume things about you, nor insinuate anything, but I realise my words had come off wrong more than once. I was harsh when I didnât mean to be, and I know you think Iâm a dick. Frankly, you have all the right to think that about me, I hadnât been the nicest to you until now.â
I wanted to ask why now, what had changed that he was finally acknowledging me, what was spurring him on to even talk to me like this, because it sounded like he was about to apologise and I hated how my heart was beating harder, making my wolf was howl in happiness, ready to accept Yunhoâs apology even if he didnât say the words. I remained silent as Yunho licked his pouty lips, and my eyes seemed to remain on them even as he continued to speak, âDo youâdo you believe in soulmates?â
I couldnât help but give Yunho an amused look, quirking an eyebrow, âWeâre literally werewolves who imprint on each other and have lifelong mates, do you believe in soulmates?â
Yunho froze, a little taken aback that I had answered his question with a question, âWhat about mates? Do you believe in mates, then?â
It seemed like neither one of us wanted to answer questions right now, but I sighed as I gave Yunho a resigned look, âI do, I believe in mates.â
âSince when?â Yunhoâs tone was turning slightly desperate as he kept pressing on, and I cleared my throat, averting my eyes for a bit.
âSince I was little, but I suppose I started firmly believing that mates do exist after I came here.â Maybe if I didnât say it too directly, heâd still understand what I was trying to hint at.
âYeah?â Yunhoâs tone was faint, his face suddenly softening as he exhaled quietly.
âWhat about you? I donât think Iâve seen you settle with anyone for a longer period since I came here.â Yunhoâs jaw clenched as I looked back into his eyes, tilting my head as my eyes narrowed at him.
âThe concept of mates was silly to meâŠâ Yunhoâs tone was hard as he took a step back, making my wolf whine in protest, but I remained silent and ignored the sudden coldness that plunged through my body, âUntil you came to Nocturnal Parade.â
My whole body went cold upon hearing his words, and my eyes widened as Yunhoâs admission echoed in my ears. Did that mean he knew we were mates? Could that mean that Yunho was aware that we were fated, but he was ignoring it on purpose? That was utterly more painful than being in a one-sided mated situation, because it meant he was purposefully rejecting me. My eyebrows furrowed as Yunhoâs expression was blank once again, his eyes hardening the longer I stared at him in silence.
âYeah?â
âYeah.â
I felt like I couldnât breathe, so many questions whirling in my head, making me question every little interaction that weâve had in the past year, even more so the recent ones. Why would he ignore me? Was I not good enough? Was I not pretty to him? Was I not appealing to his wolf? Why did Yunho hate me so much that he ignored the fact that we were mates for a whole year, making it so hard for me to be in his vicinity? I blinked, suddenly aware that I had tears in my eyes, even my wolf was whining at the realisation. Yunho didnât say anything as he watched my shocked expression morph into something of sadness mixed with anger, and then I squared my shoulders and glared at him. I didnât say anything as I pressed the book against his chest to push him back, trying to keep it together in front of him despite wanting to scream at him, demand answers, and throw all the books from the shelves at him. Yunho looked taken off guard as I pushed him back by his chest, his gasp loud as I ripped the book away from his chest and stormed back to the table I shared with San and the Song siblings, my blood fuming and my thoughts running a mile per hour. Yunho was horrible and he didnât deserve me, even if we were mates. As I loudly and aggressively sat back down in my chair, heads turned to look at me curiously, but nobody bothered me when San shook his head once he noticed Wooyoung open his mouth to drill me with questions.
There was one insistent pair of eyes, however, that didnât look away even after I had given them a death glare, and it was the creature who was sitting with Mingi and the Petrova girl. Her eyes tracked Yunho as he hurriedly gathered his things from the table and left the hall, a scowl settling on her face before she was watching me again. I opened my book and opted to ignore her, I didnât have time for all this drama, I had to finish an assignment and study for the midterms as well.
           The next day wasnât much different, except that there were barely any empty seats to find in both the Library and the Study Hall. After San and I had squeezed ourselves in between a Fae and a Druid, we spent four hours in the Library, our backs aching by the time we headed for lunch. My brain felt numb and my eyes ached from dehydration, and if I thought San would stop his revision while we enjoyed our meal, I was wrong. He was reciting a whole paragraph as he mumbled to himself over a mouthful of vegetable soup, scooping up the baby carrots into his spoon and placing them in my bowl absentmindedly. I smiled at his antics and found myself feeling fond of San and our friendship. Even though I have been here for a year and three months now, I got to experience so many new things and emotions. It was as if I was born for the first time, eager to experience our world through new lenses. If I thought back to my whole life spent in the big city, I couldnât help but feel sad over how much I had missed out on. The community, however, in Nocturnal Parade had a way of filling in the gaps, and the absence of fond and good memories in a way that tricked my brain into believing that I was always part of this town, of this community, of this pack. It was exhilarating, and for the first time in months, I found myself craving partnership.
So, when San finally started complaining about physically being unable to revise and learn anymore, his muscles crying out for a good stretch, I proposed we go on a run together. It took San only a few seconds to realise what I saying, and then he sprung up from his seat with newfound energy, packing all of his belongings in mere minutes. I giggled as I followed suit, my backpack almost falling from my hands when San grabbed my biceps and hurled me after himself with little care that I was struggling to keep my feet from tangling together as we basically ran out of the Library. I ended up giggling as San faced me with sparkling eyes, his mouth wide but curling into a dimpled smile.
âIâve been waiting for this day since forever!â San exclaimed as we hurried down the hallway for no reason, but Sanâs excitement was so palpable that I could almost touch it. It would be the second time Iâd join San on his run, so I understood why this felt like a life-changing event to him. I chuckled and linked our arms together to try and slow San down, calm him down a little bit, âWhich deity must I thank that you chose me as your companion for a run?â
I rolled my eyes and turned my head to watch San as I released his arm to let him hop down the stairs, âItâs warm outside and I canât study anymore, I feel tired. I thought you also needed a second away from it all.â
âI sure do,â San muttered under his breath as he waited at the foot of the stairs for me to reach him, âAll this studying just for me to not know which major I actually want, weâre four months away from graduating from the Academy, Y/N.â
I hummed and linked our arms together again as I veered us towards the backroads leading to campus, âI know, but youâve got this San. Whether you choose Medical Engineering or Medicine and Pharmacy, youâll do well, I just know it.â
âI want to do so much, but I feel like we have so little time,â San mumbled, his lips downturned as we left the building.
âWe might not be vampires, but we certainly have more than enough time to live a lifetime full of completing our wishes and wants, donât you think?â I tried to cheer my best friend up as I nudged his shoulder, but San just sighed long and stopped walking. His scent suddenly soured, and I frowned as he shuffled on his feet, keeping his eyes on the ground.
âIâm justâŠâ He sighed and I hummed, spurring him on to continue, âWhat if Wooyoung doesnât like me the way I like him?â
That was a tough question, I would hate myself if I answered it the wrong way and only saddened San more. I gulped and grabbed his shoulders, shaking him lightly, âSan, do you not see the way Wooyoung just gravitates towards you? His eyes glimmer when he looks at you, heâs always smiling and laughing in your presence, and heâs always whiney when you donât pay attention to him. He searches for you in every room, and heâs always talking about you, somehow roping you up into a conversation that has nothing to do with you. I know baring our feelings is scary, but what ifâŠwhat if Wooyoung likes you the way you like him, and youâre just both wasting time? And if he somehow isnât into you, itâs Wooyoung, you know nothing will change. Heâll treat you the same way, San. You might be heartbroken but life goes on, and youâll find someone who isâŠnot Wooyoung.â
âWow,â San chuckled, biting his bottom lip to stop himself from laughing, âYou really were doing so well until you brought up Wooyoung not being into me.â
âIâm sorry!â I exclaimed, feeling bad only for a second as San started laughing. I huffed as he threw an arm over my shoulders and pulled me into his side, a light flush settling over his cheeks. He was still smiling and his scent had evened out, so I knew he wasnât upset anymore. Maybe my speech was good, after all, even if I ruined it by insinuating Wooyoung might not be into San.
âYouâre right, Y/N,â San and I started walking again, âI wonât waste any more time. Iâll tell him before the next full moon.â
My eyes widened as I looked at Sanâs side profile, âThatâs in five days.â
âI know.â San and I shared a look before I hummed, grabbing him around the hips to give him a reassuring squeeze. He smiled in contentment as we wobbled our way through the grass-covered path, thankful that we didnât come across any Fae that was drinking up the warm sun rays as they lay in the grass.
And, well, thatâs how I ended up on a run not just with San, but Wooyoung also. It didnât bother me, it turned out that Wooyoung was a lot more coordinated and serious when in wolf form than he was in his human shape. His wolf wasnât too large, but it had great stamina as it ran ahead of San and me, its fur a mixture of black and white, reminding me of his brothers, who both had beautiful fur and majestic builds. At first glance, it seemed as if Wooyoung was aimlessly leading us around the forest, but I was proven wrong when we arrived at a small waterfall, of which I had no idea it even existed. My wolf purred as it shook its fur, looking around with sharp eyes, making me chuckle inside my head when I noticed San headed towards Wooyoung, rubbing their muzzles together. My wolf howled, making me feel embarrassed when both San and Wooyoung looked my way, the amused glint in Wooyoungâs wolf eyes unmistakable even like this. When I was in my wolf form, it was hard to control its reactions, so I was forced to wallow in the embarrassment of the jealousy my wolf felt over what San and Wooyoung had. Even to my wolf, it was obvious that the twoâs bond ran deep, that there was something they wouldnât be able to deny for much longer.
As if Sanâs wolf had sensed my shift in mood, he approached with strong footsteps, rising a little taller than my own wolf. He was nowhere near as large as Yunho or Mingi, but the wolf was still big and menacing looking. The darkness of its eyes was intimidating to anyone who didnât know it was San. The sourness of my scent, however, disappeared the second San affectionately brushed its body against mine, huffing under his breath as our heads bumped together in an acknowledging way. It was sweet, it tempered my wolfâs antics if only for a second as we heard the bushes rustling, the steps sounding closer and closer. My skin twitched as I bared my fangs for any unwelcome predator, but even my wolf was shocked to see a black and white wolf emerge from behind a large boulder. It was hard to think straight when your wolf was in control of your body and mind, and I had to pull every part of my mind together to stop my wolf from pouncing on Yunho the second they made eye contact. Something deep rumbled out of the black wolfâs throat as Wooyoung skipped over gleefully, its mouth opened as it made a funny sound.
Mingi imitated the sound as they bopped their noses together, a rumble leaving Sanâs throat as he stood next to me, protectively, as he watched Yunhoâs wolf. A very quiet whine managed to somehow slip past my clenched jaw still when Yunho and Wooyoung acknowledged each other, and the second I realised my wolf would actually throw itself at Yunho, I somehow gathered enough mental strength to force myself to jump away from the group, a loud howl leaving my throat. I knew everyone was watching me, but I was panting and my wolf was purring, I knew I had to leave before I created an even bigger scene. So, when I took off, hopeful that the others would let me be, my wolf almost leered at me when Yunhoâs vanilla scent permeated every part of my being, its burning gaze on my body making me choke up as I could see the big, black, wolf chase after me. Everyone else wasnât far behind, but Yunho seemed to run faster than any of them, forcing me to push myself as my paws hit the forest ground harshly, my lungs heaving for air as we waved through the trees, racing through the forest.
Yunhoâs loud puffs of air wouldâve covered my skin in goosebumps, a constant reminder of just how close he was to me, to catching me. Because it felt like a chase, as if I was running away from a dangerous predator, and would end up dead, my windpipe crushed between its malicious fangs. My heart raced in my chest and my lungs burned from the lack of air, but my wolf wasnât tired yet. In fact, it was elated that Yunho was relentlessly chasing, loud huffs and growls leaving its mouth anytime he thought he had finally caught up to us, only to realise my wolf was just tricking him and would speed up once again. My wolf was thrilled as it howled loudly, it wouldâve sounded like laughter if I was in my human form, and then it took a sharp left cut as we jumped over numerous fallen logs. My skin was on fire as adrenaline coursed through my body at an alarming state, and I couldnât remember a time when I had been so in touch with my wolf and the nature that surrounded us. I couldnât lie, I was excited as well as I listened closely to Yunhoâs heavy breaths, still hot on our trail even though he couldnât quite catch up with us.
I couldnât tell whether the others were still after us because Yunhoâs scent was so intense that it was the only thing my wolf could smell and focus on, but I hoped the others would forgive me for my sudden departure once I had apologised to them. I just hoped San wouldnât worry about me, but then again, itâs not like I couldnât take care of myself, and right now it didnât feel like I was in danger despite Yunho breathing down our neck. Before I could question where my wolf was taking us, the trees became less dense and the soil a little muddier, and I realised we were headed towards the shed. I suppose my muscles had eased up enough for me to end my run, but I wouldnât want to come to the shed since this isnât where I had left my clothes, I felt confusion spike through my senses, but my wolf was quick to completely push it down. My bones started aching as I gasped loudly for air, the shed now in eyesight as I realised my wolf was forcing me to shift. I didnât want to be naked out in the wild, but I couldnât stop the transformation if my wolf forced it upon me. I groaned when my bones snapped into place, the burgundy fur slowly disappearing as I was forced up onto my legs, my claws slowly retracting into normal nails as my jaw snapped into place, a little sore from the sudden action.
I could feel my hair brush just above my shoulders and I gasped as I tumbled forward into the shedâs door, my feet aching and numb from having pushed myself too hard in the chase. My body felt on fire as my heart raced loudly in my chest, the adrenaline making me more alert than normal as I hurried inside the shed, trying to shift back so that I wouldnât have to walk to campus naked, but my wolf was opposed to the idea. Before I could wonder why, all my questions were answered. The shedâs door slammed shut loudly behind me and I jumped, whirling around in panic as Yunhoâs tall form stood looming in the doorway. There was something different about him right now, about the air between us. It was tense, I felt like I couldnât breathe in the dim lighting of the shed, and I gulped as I took in Yunhoâs appearance. His long brown hair was all over the place, falling into his dark eyes, which lacked their warmth. They were narrowed into slits as he was panting through his mouth, his cheeks tinged a deep red, the flush continuing down to his chest. His fangs hadnât retracted yet, though, and they were poking past his pink bottom lip. Yunhoâs nose was scrunched up as he leered at me, and I gulped nervously, all of a sudden too aware of my nakedness as I tried to shield my exposed private parts with my hand and arm.
Something prompted Yunho to suddenly push forward, consequently making me backtrack until I collided with the old wooden table, making my heart race even faster as Yunho slowly stalked towards me, his eyes an intense orchid colour. I felt shy all of a sudden as if we hadnât already seen each other naked, but my wolf purred at me and forced my hands away from my body as I felt frozen in place, big eyes looking up at Yunho once he stood too close, too easy to reach. His heart was pounding just as hard as mine as his chest fell and rose rapidly, and my eyes fluttered shut when his vanilla scent made my head swim. It felt as if I was underwater, trying to grip onto my last string of sanity as Yunho growled, hot fingers digging into my hip. My eyes flew open, widening as I looked down at Yunhoâs hand holding me, leaving crescent moons as his chapped yellow nails dug into my warm skin. He stepped even closer, caging me in, and making me look up at him as I felt hazy. My wolf was whispering at me to spread my legs just a little further and let him nestle in between them. I wanted Yunho like nothing else before.
âY/N.â Yunhoâs voice was the lowest I have ever heard it be. His eyes seemed to be unfocused as he grabbed me with both hands now, slowly tracing my sides as if he were memorising my body. I had to bite my bottom lip to stop any sounds from escaping, and in a moment of weakness, I allowed my wolf to do to its liking as I raised my right hand, fingers almost hesitantly touching Yunhoâs left peck. He shivered as his jaw tightened, stepping even closer until our bodies were touching. It was too much to feel all of him against my skin, his body burning mine up in a way I thought wasnât possible. My breath stuttered in my throat when Yunhoâs fingers ghosted over my breasts, mine travelling lower on his torso until they were massaging circles right above his happy trail, making him growl, âI canât do it anymore.â
It was hard to speak, but I needed to understand what he meant. I swallowed around nothing, letting my head fall back as Yunhoâs pupils dilated upon seeing my exposed neck, âWhatâwhat do you mean?â
Without realising, my hands were tracing his lower back, slipping lower and lower until they hovered right above his ass cheeks, hesitant to touch until Yunho roughly grabbed my left breast, rutting against my thigh. I keened, pressing him closer as my fingers dug into his naked flesh, my skin practically singing as he tilted my head even further back with his free hand, his index finger pressing against my bottom lip insistently. I couldnât breathe as the wooden edge of the table dug into my back, but I didnât care as my body experienced things it never had before. It was exhilarating, but also scary that I had given in so quickly. I knew it was mostly my wolf doing this, but I couldnât find my grip. I actually didnât want to, so I let my wolf take the lead for once when it came to Yunho. Itâs what weâve wanted for a year, after all, to feel him all over us, close to us, in us.
âYouâre so alluring,â Yunho whispered as his head lowered, his hot lips pressing against my cheek as I flushed a darker red, âMaddening to the point I canât sleep at night, Y/N. I want to devour you whole, take you as you are. I need you.â
I whimpered as Yunho and I made eye contact, his hand which was holding my breast now sneaking to my lower back as he made me arch into him, my lower stomach coiling at how easy it would be to just let him take whatever he needed. And I wanted it too, my wolf was desperate for it, so I leaned up until our lips were brushing together, my own orchid eyes reflected in his.
âWhy now?â I whispered, watching as Yunho gulped, lips parting as if he was trying to inhale my very breath, âWhy do you want me now?â
I gasped when Yunho suddenly hoisted me up, my legs crushing his hips as I latched onto him, my eyes shaking slightly as he nipped at my jawline, his fangs dangerous but not there to harm, âItâs not just now, I always want you. Even when Iâm sleeping, youâre in my every dream.â
My eyes fluttered close as Yunho kissed behind my ear, making me sigh in pleasure as he trailed more kisses on my neck until he was dangerously close to my scent gland, âBut youâve always ignored me, I thought you didnât like me.â
Yunho growled as he nipped at my skin, making me lick my lips as we came eye to eye once again. I wanted to kiss him breathless, but he was talking before I could do so, âI donât like you, Iâm obsessed with you. I want you to be mine, forever. I had known you belonged to me the second I first saw you.â
My wolf purred and I moaned as he pressed open-mouthed kisses against my neck, up to my jawline until our cheeks were pressed together, and he was nuzzling his nose into it, his sandalwood scent rubbing deeply into my skin. Our noses bumped together and my wolf was leering, so happy that we were in Yunhoâs arms, so lenient to let him mark us, mate us. And just like that, my heartbeat stuttered and my eyebrows furrowed, somehow my mind clearing through the lustful fog that was clouding it, âSince the second you first saw me?â
âYes,â Yunho muttered lowly, kissing my cheek before he looked into my eyes, âI had smelled you before I had even seen you, I thought I was going crazy, turns out I wasnât. I had just found my mate.â
Before my wolf could let me gloss over this new piece of information, I pressed, âSo you knew all this time that we were mates? That I was fated to be with you?â
âYes, Y/N, I knew.â The grin on Yunhoâs face was anything but pleasant as my heart dropped all the way to my stomach. He knew all this time and he left me in the dark to suffer alone, cry myself to sleep thinking I wasnât good enough, that even my own mate didnât want anything to do with me. I had thought all this time that I was too weird, too much, too shy to be fated with someone like Yunho, I had thought it was a cruel joke made by the Universe to laugh at me, I couldnât have a peaceful and perfect life even if we left the city. I had been suffering for the past year and all this time Yunho knew, and yet, he did it on purpose. He didnât care for me, he didnât think for a second what this did to my mental health and image of myself. He was my mate, yet instead of protecting me, making me happy, and keeping me safe, he pushed me towards my darkest times where I felt like I wasnât even real, that I didnât matter to anyone, that Iâd never be enough.
âPut me down.â My tone was just as shaky as my whole mental state right now, crumbling faster than my wolf could grasp the situation and try to silence me again. Yunhoâs eyes widened slightly, then his eyebrows furrowed, and instead of doing what I asked, he only held me tighter, âYunho, put me down right now.â
âY/N, I donâtâlisten, we can discuss this. I messed up, if you listen to the wholeââ
âIf you donât put me down right now, Yunho, youâll never see me again.â My wolf was whining as Yunhoâs expression crumbled into hurt and panic, his chest falling and rising rapidly as I could hear his heart race for different reasons now. But I wouldnât let this go his way, I couldnât just gloss over this and act as if I hadnât been miserable since the moment I met him. It hurt too much, even my wolf was finally realising what was happening, that he had actively refused his mate for whatever reason I wasnât curious to know. And even though I could see it in Yunhoâs eyes, the need to go against my demand and keep me here, very slowly, he started to move, letting one leg down at a time. My feet were cold as they touched the shedâs flooring, and I gulped as Yunho still hounded me into the table. I tried to keep the tears out of my eyes as I gulped, taking a shaky breath. Then, I pushed him back since he wasnât moving away, and closed my eyes as I felt my bones shift around without me having to force my wolf to cooperate. So much for running with your pack.
           The tables have somehow turned. It wasnât me yearning after Yunho anymore, it was him yearning after me now. He was everywhere I went, albeit the Academyâs grounds werenât as humongous as a townâs grounds, but he was everywhere. I couldnât enjoy my meals anymore, I couldnât study in the Library or the Study Hall, I couldnât sit out in the Flower Fields on a blanket reading, and I couldnât even go on runs at a reasonable hour because Yunho was always there. It was slightly frightening and disarming, but my wolf was elated. She was practically mewling at all times, baring her neck in Yunhoâs direction anytime she could. Good thing my will was stronger than hers. It was peculiar to see how good I was at actually dismissing Yunhoâs whole existence, giving him a taste of his own medicine. I didnât find joy in ignoring him, but I was mad and hurt. I wouldnât allow him to just crawl back into my life as if nothing had happened, as if he hadnât known all this time that we were mates. Only a week had passed since our encounter on the run and the whole thing that went down in the shed, and I was positive Yunho was close to losing his mind.
I had felt like that for a good two months, but I took it a lot better than he was right now. He looked like he hadnât slept for two days at least, with dark bags under his eyes and his hair all wavy and in a man-bun since it looked unwashed. His nails lacked their usual vibrant colour and his outfits seemed less crazy, as if he wasnât putting much thought into them anymore, just wearing whatever was at hand. Yesterday, he had even worn one of Mingiâs black hoodies, a colour unseen on Yunho previously. It was jarring, I couldnât lie, but I wasnât going to give in to him just because he was moping about me keeping my distance from him. It wasnât even that deep, I hadnât even rejected him like he had done with me, I just needed time to sort out my feelings and thoughts, but I suppose Yunho didnât know that and assumed things were over between us. As if there had been anything, to begin with. Yeri, who had no issues rooming with me but didnât usually hang out much with me otherwise, was now suspiciously all up in my business every damn day, resulting in Yunho tagging along. I knew the Song siblings were close, but I hadnât seen Yunho and Yeri spend more than one hour together at the Academy, so they werenât slick with it when Yunho followed after Yeri, and subsequently me, all day like a kicked puppy.
But if it wasnât Yeri, then it was Dahyun, who had never spoken to me more than five words at once, but was now eager to get to know me, complimenting me about my rusty coloured hair and forcing me to do beaded bracelets with her in the Study Hall while Yunho sat a few seats away from us, staring at me without even blinking. Their antics had gotten old and irritating quite quickly, but the last nail had been today during lunch. I sat with San and Wooyoung, who were disgustingly sweet now that they had finally sorted out their relationship. They werenât dating, but they were certainly something more than friends, and they seemed fine with that, so, who was I to judge them? Our lunch was full of chatter as Wooyoung cackled at every small thing, animatedly retelling a time when San had tried to sneak into his room, only to slip down the roof and fall face-first into the mud. He had broken two teeth and had almost fractured his cheekbone if it wasnât for our magical werewolf healing. My appetite had even returned as my wolf was finally done acting as if it was the end of the world, however, when Yunhoâs oppressing sandalwood scent wafted through the air, it felt like my whole day was ruined.
Mingi and his girlfriend joined our table with quiet greetings as they sat, Yunho hot in tow as his eyes burned into the side of my head. I have had enough, but before I could excuse myself, Wooyoung was already talking to Yunho. The vampire girl gave me an understanding look before she sat back, pushing around the vegetables until Mingi noticed and took them from her. I watched their interactions while paying attention to Wooyoung, who had slightly settled down when San squeezed his thigh. But Yunho was still staring, breathing shallowly, his bottom lip jutting out almost pitifully. I wanted to yell at him that this was his fault and that I was sick of everything, but I kept my composure until I couldnât anymore. A scoff made us all look up, and I realised it was the same creature from the Library, part of Petrovaâs friend group.
âLook at you,â She sneered at Yunho malevolently, her lips curling into a wicked smirk, âYou thought you had found another bitch just to get kicked to the curb by her, didnât you? How pitiful.â
Before I could stop myself, I pushed my chair back and looked at the creature with a glare, âWho are you calling a bitch?â
I hadnât intended to growl, but my wolf was just as triggered as me, and we really didnât want to be provoked today. I wasnât confrontational, but I was beyond stressed by the midterms, and now Yunhoâs behaviour too.
Before this whole ordeal could escalate into something else, the Petrova girl scoffed, rolling her eyes, âReally, Seulgi? I thought we agreed youâd finally let it go.â
Seulgi, Yunhoâs ex-girlfriend I realised, bared her fangs at the other vampire, âJust because you suck your werewolf boyfriendâs dick, you shouldnât look down on your kin. Or did you forget who you are and where you come from?â
I hadnât seen anyone get angry as fast as the Petrova girl, her whole face going red, but before the two vampires could turn this into something physical, Mingi stood and faced Seulgi, âI would appreciate it if you stopped harassing my girlfriend, your own friend, Seulgi. Last time I checked, you and Yunho broke up because you cheated on him. Whatâs your fucking problem, huh? Do you want me to rip you apart? I would love to sink my fangs intoââ
âMingi.â His girlfriend looked sick as she gripped his hand tightly, shaking her head at him. Mingi took a sharp breath and looked at her with a guilty expression before he faced Seulgi again, who looked to be fuming. I exhaled, then grabbed my backpack and tapped Sanâs shoulder.
âIâm not hungry anymore, see you later.â Before San could ask where I was going, I was basically running out of the canteen, desperate to get away from everyone. The other students were staring at us curiously, and I hated it. I was tired and irritated, I just wanted to be alone and away from anything that was connected to Yunho. I knew Iâd have to face him and have a conversation with him sooner or later, but maybe Iâd first make him suffer for his choices for another few months. Maybe until we graduate.
My footsteps echoed down the corridor as I decided to head back to my dorm and take a nap, I still had some time until my Calculus class. However, footsteps followed mine hurriedly, and judging based on the absence of an overbearing scent, I guessed it was a vampire that was trailing me. Maybe it was the Petrova girl, I actually hoped it was her since I didnât really want to speak to anyone who couldnât take a hint. She was rather good at reading the room, over the past week weâve hung out more, and I got to know her a bit better. She was anything like Yeri had made her sound, and I was just glad to have a friend who was a female and my age. I was snapped out of my thoughts when I felt sharp nails digging through my sleeve and into my skin, making my wolf growl as I turned around with a sharp glare. It was Yunhoâs ex, the black-haired girl, Seulgi.
âWhat do you want?â I snapped, my eyebrows furrowing when she didnât let go of my arm. She looked me up and down with a grimace, scoffing under her breath.
âAre you Yunhoâs new bitch?â My jaw tensed and my wolf growled, but Seulgi continued before I could speak, âHave you fucked already? Did he tell you that you are the love of his life only to cheat on you with a fucking dog the next day?â
So, she was associating werewolves with dogs now, huh? I couldnât have disliked her more than I already did, but I gulped down the nasty names I couldâve called her, and opted to be the adult in this damn conversation, âEven if my answers to your questions were all yes, how is that your concern? Arenât you just his ex?â
âI might be his ex,â Seulgi snickered, stepping closer, âBut I know him better than anyone elseââ
âI highly doubt thatâs true since he has a twin brother, but sure, whatever you say, darling.â I cut her off, my tone turning cold as something like jealousy gripped my heart. My wolf was far from exhilarated to know that Seulgi and Yunho shared a past, but everyone had a life before they met their mates, no? I couldnât flip out over something like this.
âListen here, bitch,â Seulgi hissed, stepping so close I could smell her breath. It reeked of blood and menthol, âIâm just here to warn you, but since you want to get smart with me, I might as well give you a piece of my mind. You are nothing toââ
âKang Seulgi.â Yunhoâs sharp and dark tone made me shiver and Seulgiâs eyes widened. I hadnât even heard him approach, too focused on Seulgi and my own anger. His scent was strong, the sandalwood making it hard to breathe as it spiked sourly, âHavenât I told you countless times to leave alone anyone that comes in contact with me?â
âAre you scared Iâll let them know who you really are? This bitch isnât even into you, I canââ
âYou canât do nothing, shut the fuck up, you know nothing.â Yunho sneered as he stopped next to me, a few good heads taller than Seulgi as he loomed over her. She didnât look intimidated or scared as she grinned widely, almost insane looking. She tilted her head, her eyes slipping between the two of us.
âYou think just because you scent this bitch others wonât touchââ I flinched when Yunho suddenly grabbed her by the throat, yanking her towards himself. Even Seulgi seemed shocked, her eyes turning wide as she gripped Yunhoâs wrist in fear.
âIf you call her a bitch one more time, Seulgi, I swear to fucking God, I will murder you right here and right now.â Yunhoâs growl was guttural, I knew his wolf was talking rather than him, but Seulgi didnât seem to realise that as she started shaking like a leaf. She gasped, her eyes flickering to me before she tried to smooth out her face and look friendlier.
âIs sheâYunho, it hurts.â She whined, lower lip trembling as Yunhoâs nails grew sharper and dug more into her neck. I stepped up, knowing that Yunho wasnât completely himself.
âLet her go, Yunho, youâre hurting her.â My tone was harsh, and I gripped his lower arm to squeeze it painfully. Yunho huffed and let go of Seulgi, who I grabbed before she could stumble over her own feet.
âAre you alright?â I asked quietly as she started to hyperventilate, her eyes filled with tears.
âAre you mates?â Her voice was quiet as she looked back at Yunho, leaving me speechless. I opened my mouth to deny it, but no words came out.
âYes.â It was Yunho who answered, firm and loud, I could feel him step closer as his warmth mingled with mine. Seulgi gulped, then looked at him before at me, brushing my touch off her.
âIâm sorry.â Then she turned and hurried off before we could stop her, her sobs quite loud as they echoed down the corridors. I gulped, feeling a lump in my throat as Yunho was still behind me, hovering over me as if I would run away if he didnât.
Even I had a breaking point, so I gave in, âWhat do you wantââ
âForgive me, for everything.â Yunho was speaking before I could even finish my sentence as he came around me, and gripped my cheeks, taking me off guard, âI donât demand you do it right away, I know you must be very angry with me right now, but please, listen to me before you say anything. I didnât believe in mates because my parents arenât true mates. My fatherâs mate died when they were children and my mother denied her real mate to be with my father, so I decided to take matters into my own hands and not wait for love to find me. IâI also mightâve been selfish and a jackass for not wanting to settle down just yet, that is mainly the reason Iâve tried to ignore our bond this whole time.
âItâs so shitty of me and Iâm so ashamed of myself, but I was scared that you might not want me back, that I might be in a one-sided situationship. My parents had always told us that we have the right to deny whoever the Universe destined us with and find our own person, but they were wrong, theyâthey donât know what the pull of a true mate feels like. When Mingi and Petrova started going out, I was so angry, I felt so abandoned. Mingi and I had promised we would never imprint on anyone, but he broke his promise when he imprinted on Petrova. I was so dumb to be mad at him, and I was even more dumb to try and deny what we two have. I realised I was jealous of Mingi at some point because I thought Iâd never have what he has, and then you showed up and IâI didnât know what to do, how to navigate all these new emotions. I also had a girlfriend at the time and I seriously thought weâd work out, butâŠyou were all I could think about and want. In fact, I donât want anyone else but you, Y/N. Iâm justâIâm asking you to give me a chance. Just one chance.â
I gulped, overwhelmed by Yunhoâs confession and his proximity altogether as my wolf purred, prompting me to nuzzle my cheek into Yunhoâs palm, inhale his scent deeply as my nose brushed against his hot wrist, âOne chance?â
Yunhoâs heart skipped a beat as vanilla wrapped around us, his eyes regaining that pretty spark in them, âYes, just one chance, I beg. Iâll prove myself to you, Iâll treat you right, and Iâll love you unconditionally. I want to make up for the lost time, may Iâcan you let me? Iâll do whatever you ask of me.â
I licked my lips and watched as Yunhoâs mouth parted, inhaling through his lips as his heart started racing. His ears were flushed and I smiled, a little amused, as I raised my left hand and cupped his cheek, making his eyes widen. But he didnât stay frozen, he let his right hand fall from my cheek as he pressed his palm over my hand to keep it firmly pressing into his cheek, âI wonât forgive you overnight, I hope youâre aware of that. You made me really suffer, Yunho, it was so painful at some points, I thought the broken bond would kill me.â
âIâm sorry,â Yunho whispered sorrowfully as he leaned forward to press his forehead against mine, and I sighed, closing my eyes. For a second, it felt as if it were just the two of us in the world, our scents mixed and creating a safe cocoon that couldnât be broken unless we wanted it to. I felt my heart beat in a new rhythm, one that was stronger and more frantic somehow. I realised it was Yunhoâs heartbeat I was feeling, and not my own, it made me wonder whether he could feel mine too.
âI havenât felt this complete my whole life,â Yunho whispered in a shaky tone and I gulped, angling my head so that our noses would brush together. Yunhoâs sharp exhale fanned over my face and I smiled, listening to the whisper of my wolf. She was right, I finally had him, and I didnât have to withhold anymore. Even if with baby steps, we could work this out, I could forgive him if he proves himself to be a respectable and trustworthy werewolf. So, I tilted my head away, hearing Yunhoâs breath catch as if he was panicking until my lips were pressing against his pink ones. They were warm, just like I had fantasized they would be, and they tasted like strawberries. I almost giggled, but I was too focused on the feeling that spread through my body, stealing my breath away even if it was just an innocent and fleeting peck to Yunhoâs lips. My body tingled, and it felt like I saw the world for the first time when my eyes fluttered open, Yunho was already staring at me deeply. His cheeks were flushed dark, his fake blush all but disappearing under his real blush, and he was smiling so widely his cheeks mustâve hurt once we pulled away. I chuckled and shook my head, gently placing my arms around his neck as he hugged me close to himself.
âThis isnât me forgiving you, by the way, my wolf is just too desperate at this point for me to fight against her,â I muttered and Yunho laughed, his eyes creasing as he threw his head back, the sound of his joy music to my ears. I couldnât help but grin widely and tighten my arms around him, wondering how I had gotten so lucky to have him of all werewolves as my mate.
âMine too, are you busy right now?â The mischievous glint in Yunhoâs eyes told me whatever we were about to do would define how weâd move forward with our relationship.
âNot really, why?â
âMingi wonât be back until late evening, the dorm is all mine,â Yunho whispered, biting his bottom lip as his pupils dilated, eyes slowly trailing down my body as if I was already naked.
âGood, because I forbid Yeri from bringing back boys to our dorm, I canât go around breaking my own rule.â I wriggled my eyebrows at Yunho, making him laugh as his hands slowly slipped lower on my torso, feeling me all up. It made me feel hot all over, my wolf purring loudly as I fought the urge to tilt my head back and bare my neck at Yunho.
âOh, the horror on her face if sheâd see her brother under your sheets.â Yunho made a mocking sound as he pressed a hand against his mouth, my eyes lingered on his long fingers. Iâm sure he noticed because he suddenly smirked, then swiftly pecked my lips before he detached himself from me, intertwining our fingers as he eagerly led the way towards our side of campus, âLetâs stop wasting time.â
I hummed, feeling my chest all warm from Yunhoâs warmth, my cheeks flushed and my heart racing in my chest. All this time I thought my mate would never want me back, yet here we were now, headed to explore what the future held for us. My wolf and I couldnât have been happier.
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Christmas movie au Advent Calendar đ
Day Twenty-One: (âïž)Snow globe(âïž)
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After dinner, they sat cuddled up on the couch.
Aiden made himself a home in between Talonâs legs, head leaning against his chest and Talonâs arms securely wrapped around him.
Talon wouldnât mind staying like this forever, freezing this moment in to put it in a snow globe and hold on to it forever.
It felt an awful lot like the calm before a storm and he pulled Aiden even closer to himself.
âWhat was Christmas like for you? Before your family stopped celebrating, I mean?â Aiden asked and Talon froze for a second.
âYou donât have to tell me, if you donât want to talk about it,â he added quietly, fingers drawing patterns near Talonâs collarbone as if to soothe him.
âNo, I want to.â Talon gulped. âItâs just⊠itâs been so longâŠâ
Yet he remembered it vividly, he just hadnât allowed himself to think about it.
âWhen I was younger, Christmas was my highlight of the year. We usually spent it at my uncle Kieranâs house, because it was big enough to host such an event. And it really was an event. Most of my family was there, as well as my uncleâs friends.
There was a huge Christmas tree in the main hall and decoration everywhere and the largest table I had ever seen, filled with so much food us children thought it could feed a whole village.â
He chuckled.
âUncle Kieran always hosted nice Christmas parties like this with music and buffet and a present exchange. It was a sight to behold and everyone had so much fun. I think you wouldâve liked it. It was like in one of those Christmas movies.â
Talonâs hand found its way in Aidenâs hair as he kept talking.
âBut what I always liked best was Christmas Eve before it, where it was just my parents, my sister, Kieran and me.
My mom wouldâve prepared dinner and even got dad to help her with it and my uncle played with us children. He taught me a new Christmas song to play on either the violin or the guitar each year.â
He smiled fondly, lost in the memories. He had almost forgotten how he had loved the holiday.
âMy sister and me had to play something on the instrument before we got our presents - my family was very traditional when it came to things like this. And then we got our presents.
My uncle always got me the things my dad would never have bought for me, no matter how much I begged him. Stuff like video games or action figures.
One year he gifted me a violin, way too valuable for a child my age, but he said that a professional needed a professional instrument.â
Talonâs father had been skeptical if this was a good present for a five year old, but Kieran had insisted.
He had his first own violin when he was even younger, he claimed.
âTalent needs to be supported,â he said, laying his hand on Talonâs head. âAnd Talon has plenty of talent.â
Talon wanted to be a musician back then, but that childhood dream had died with his uncle, probably even before.
After all, heâd inherit a family business.
âThat sounds nice,â Aiden whispered, as if afraid that him speaking any louder would scare Talon away.
Talon nodded.
âHe was. And with his present came a Christmas card. He wrote one for me every year, addressing it to âhis favorite nephewâ, until the very last Christmas we shared together before heâŠâ
He fell silent.
âI still have all of them, in my apartment somewhere. I couldnât bring myself to leave them behind when I moved out. It was always our little tradition.â
He hadnât even noticed the single tear running down his cheek before Aiden shifted in his lap and leaned up to kiss it away.
âYou mustâve really loved him. Iâm sorry,â he cupped Talonâs cheek with a hand.
Talon leaned into it, closing his eyes.
âI did.â He opened them again to look at Aiden. âThank you.â
His voice was barely about a whisper but they were so close Aiden understood it nonetheless.
He kissed him then.
Because he wanted to and Aiden was right here, in front of him, and life was too short to miss out on even the smallest chances he got to do it.
After a while, Aiden pulled away, taking Talonâs face in both of his hands and Talon almost started to tear up again just at the gentleness of this gesture.
âYour uncle and the Christmases you shared with him sound really great. Iâm sorry that you lost all that. But I hope youâll at least find your joy in Christmas again. I think your uncle would want it, too.â
He was probably right with that.
For so many years Talon had been busy pushing away all the negative feelings regarding his uncle and Christmas, that he didnât notice that it kept out all the good feelings and memories he had, too.
All it took for him to achieve this clarity was to be sent into this little Christmas-loving town of all places.
That and the person in front of him.
Aiden had given him so much. He deserved to know the truth. Despite that knowledge weighing down on him, he smiled, putting his hands over Aidenâs.
âI did find it. Thanks to you.â
Aiden let go of Talon and leaned back, just looking at Talon.
âIâm glad,â he said then and smiled.
Shortly after, Aiden excused himself to go get them something to drink and Talon was left alone in the warm living room of Aidenâs house.
It was already cozy to begin with, but the Christmas decorations that were added recently gave the room a whole different charm.
Talon found it comfortable here, there was a feeling of warmth and safety in the air.
Like a magical aura surrounding the room.
Talon let his eyes wander through the room, taking it all in.
This here: this room, this house, the farm⊠Talon promised himself to find a way to protect it, no matter the prize he had to pay.
His gaze got stuck on something that sat on the mantelpiece of the huge fireplace, something he hadnât noticed before.
He stood up to get to look at it from up closer.
It was a snow globe, he realized as he stood in front of the fireplace.
A very pretty snow globe, big and heavy enough that he needed both of his hands to be able to properly hold it.
Inside the snow globe was a little scenery:
Snow covering the floor and dusting the four Christmas trees in the background and before it a prettily decorated carriage loaded with a bag of presents, drawn by a single white horse and with no one less than Santa himself holding the reigns.
Next to Santa, a little girl with black curls sat in the carriage. Maybe she was supposed to be an elf or an angel, from the look of her it couldâve been both.
The pedestal the globe stood on was red with little handmade decorations in gold and green drawn on it. In the middle of it stood a name:
Ranva.
It was a pretty sight and as he slowly turned the little clockwork key on the back, gentle glistening snow was swirling around the globe.
He smiled to himself, carefully setting the snow globe down again.
âPretty, isnât it?â Aidenâs voice asked close to his ear and Talon was glad he had put the snow globe down already, otherwise he wouldâve most likely dropped it.
âYes, very.â He turned to look at Aiden, who stood next to him, eying the snow globe fondly.
âIt was my motherâs,â he said, reaching out and gently swiping his finger over the engraved name on the pedestal.
âShe got it as a gift from her parents when she was little, cause the girl looked like her. It was one of the few things she took with her as she came here.â
He smiled.
âIt was kind of our tradition, you know? Each year for Christmas she put the snow globe on the mantelpiece.
And each year on Christmas Eve she took it from its rightful place, sat down on the couch with it and let my brother and me cuddle up to her, telling us the story about a girl and how she got to help out Santa.â
A chuckle escaped his lips.
âIt was the only time we were allowed to hold it, otherwise it had to remain where it was. My mom wasnât really a strict mother but she took this one rule very serious.â
He sighed.
âThe first two or so year after her death, we couldnât put the snow globe up for Christmas, because father would freak out about it.
I put it in my room, once, because it made me feel like she was with us for Christmas, you know? But dad saw it and had a mental breakdown. I didnât dare to put it back up ever since.â
âIâm sorry about that,â Talon said, grabbing Aidenâs hand.
Aiden squeezed their joined hands lightly, then he let go and used it to brush away the tears gathering in his eyes.
âItâs okay. The years after her death have been hard, but heâs better now. Now when he looks at it, heâs smiling, not crying. We have it up for the fifth year in a row this Christmas.â
âThatâs nice.â Aiden smiled sadly. âIt isâŠâ He looked away.
âWhat is it?â Talon asked, making Aiden look at him. âWhatâs wrong?â
Aiden sighed, closing his eyes.
âI was just thinking about how this will probably be our last Christmas here.â
He opened his eyes to look at Talon and for the first time since they knew each other Talon wished those eyes wouldnât look at him so directly, so he didnât have to see the sadness in them.
And so that Aiden couldnât see the guilt in his.
âWhat are you talking about?â
Stop lying, Talon scolded himself. You know exactly what he is talking about. You need to tell him.
âItâs senseless to keep up hope. We wonât be able to get enough money to save the farm, so we have to take the offer of these people.
Mr. Hawkins made a good offer, it will be enough to start a comfortable life someplace new but⊠it kills me to think about losing the farm. Not just not living or working here anymore, but it just being⊠gone.
Thinking about some stupid hotel or mall or whatever it is that they want to build here and that this town doesnât need standing in its stead. Generations of family history lostâŠ
I donât want to be the one of my family who failed. I donât want to be the reason father loses his whole legacy. Our legacy.â
His grip on Talon grew more desperate with every word and Talonâs heart broke at the same time as Aidenâs voice.
âHe barely survived losing mom.â
Tears threatened to fall, but Aiden didnât cry again. Didnât allow himself too, probably.
Too strong for it.
Too proud.
âI donât want him to lose the place that he made his home with her, too.â
Tell him, his mind screamed. You need to tell him.
Talon wasnât as strong as Aiden, he did start to cry, silent tears falling from his face without his consent.
This was it then, the final moment. The one that would ruin everything.
But he couldnât keep going like this, lying to Aiden about it all.
It would be selfish, dishonest, disrespectful.
It would be no basis for a relationship.
âIâm sorry, Aiden,â he said, grief tying up his throat. âIâm so so sorry.â
His reaction surprised Aiden so much that he let go of him.
âWhatâs wrong?â
Concern showed in his eyes, concern for Talon, even though it was Aiden who had all the worries.
And Talon was just about to cause him even more.
He didnât deserve Aidenâs concern.
âAiden, I-â Talon took a deep breath.
âThereâs something I need to tell you.â
#this again is deserving of the tag get your tissues ready (in my humble opinion at least)#writer speaks#writeblr#wip: the knights of the alder#Christmas movie au#Christmas movie au: Advent calendar 2024#writing#my writing
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smog & spirits: the rat king (mini-series)
Marvel 1920s Gangster/Peaky Blinders Inspired Fantasy AU
gangsterboss!bucky x witch!reader
Bucky Barnes, the leader of Sootstone's Smog Boys, needs a favour. A nasty curse has been cast on him, and he needs a witch to help him break it.
Warnings: 18+ content minors dni, fem reader, physical violence, angst, wound description, threats, some fluff, protective bucky, bucky barnes had issues, cults and religion mentioned, criminals & crime, 1920s street gangs, witchcraft, vaguely british setting??, no use of y/n, lmk if i've missed anything
Word Count: 6.2k
A/N: hi!! just wanted to say thank you all so much for the love on the last chapter and sticking with me!! i know i hadn't posted in forever with being busy with uni and all so it really made me happy that people still remembered this fic. this chapter (once again) was supposed to cover a lot more but i got carried away lol, so instead i'm posting this half and then the next half soon once i have it properly written up. anyway!! please enjoy!! sorry for any typos - not proof read.
taglist: @nash-dara @sebastians-love
main masterlist | series masterlist
Gertrude Crowley was a nervous woman.
It was the first thing you noticed about her; her movements were hesitant, as though she feared drawing too much attention. In the dim light, you noticed her faceâworn, yes, but not aged beyond her years. Lines of worry etched her brow and framed her mouth. Her greying hair, streaked with darker remnants of its original chestnut hue, was hastily pinned beneath a weathered black scarf, frazzled tufts poking through the holes strewn throughout the fabric.
âTea, Ms. Crowley?â You asked the woman. Despite your soft tone, the woman jumped in her seat, hand raising to her bosom as she took in a sharp breath.
âI suppose, Dear.â She squeaked in reply
You gave the older woman a reassuring smile, hoping to calm her fears. Her pale blue eyes darted away quickly, revealing a haunted expression. They glanced at you briefly, then withdrew as if frightened by what they might find. She fidgeted with her hands, the frayed edges of her gloves exposing trembling fingers.
âTea is good for the soul, donât you think?â You hummed to her softly, your upper half bent over your kitchen table, and you poured the steaming liquid into two cups. You hoped the woman wouldnât comment on how the ceramic was chipped; the painted flowers faded from years of use. âAlways so cold in The Warrens, it warms you up from the inside.â
Ms Crowley nodded stiffly, teacup rattling against its matching plate as she held it in trembling hands. You took a brief moment to observe her, eyes searching her appearance. Her clothing was plain but serviceableâa dark woollen cloak that hung unevenly over her frame, its hem damp and muddied from the streets. Beneath it, a simple grey dress fitted her modestly, cinched at the waist with a cracked but sturdy belt. A brass locket hung around her neck, glinting faintly when she shifted. Though practical and well-worn, her boots carried scuffs deep enough that you questioned if the dark fabric was her socks beneath.
She took a hesitant sip from her cup and looked up at you with a smile that didnât quite meet her eyes. âThank you, dear.â
You settled into your seat, dragging your cup across the table's woodgrain. âHow can I be of assistance?â
Ms Crowley hesitated, her lips thinning into a line as she contemplated a response. You wisely decided to allow her some space, and the steaming liquid cupped in your palm suddenly became the most fascinating thing in the world.Â
The older woman stumbled over her words, once, twice, thrice before finally settling on a simple, âI..I have never met a witch before.â
You smiled down into your cup, elbows resting on the table as you slowly looked up at her through a strand of loose hair that had fallen across your forehead. âI think you will find witches are alike most people you would meetâjust like any stranger you would pass on the street.â
She peered across the tableâas if testing your own words against you. Her tired, pale blue eyes squinting as she examined you from head to toe. âI suppose⊠I suppose youâre right. And I suppose I should trust you. I âave been told most witches are trustworthy.â
âWe are.â You state simply, only pausing to take a sip from your cup. The warm liquid fills your belly, a soft hum escaping your throat as you tilt you head in thought. âWeâre salesmen, in a way, sellinâ our wares. There will always be scam artists, a few among the many, but most of us are just makinâ ends meet.â
The older woman contemplates your words. She takes a sip, a long one, then nods in affirmation. âYouâre right. I should have some faith.â
âNow, Ms. Crowley, how can I help you?â You query once again.
âWell⊠I donât know how this all worksâŠâ
âJust tell me what troubles you. From the start, if possible.â
Before she could speak, the door creaked open behind you, breaking the fragile quiet that had settled over the room. The sound was faint, yet it resonated through the stillness like the tolling of a distant church bell. Your breath hitched, fingers tightening around the chipped teacup as a wave of unease swept through you. The air seemed heavier, colderâan unspoken warning curling down your spine.
âSpirit-raiser.â
That voice. Gravelly, familiar. Unwelcome. You sucked in a sharp breath, though it felt as though your ribcage had suddenly shrunk two sizes too small for your organs. The bruises still present across your abdomen ached as every muscle in your body tensed, a tangled knot of shock electrifying your nerves. But beyond that, beyond the anger and disbelief, there was a feeling far more treacherous: relief.
He returned.
Your head whipped around, posture immediately straightening as though your spine was a pole made of steel. There he wasâBucky Barnes, leaning in the doorway like he owned the place, his sharp, stormy eyes swept over you, then flicked briefly to Ms. Crowley, whose face drained of colour. The woman looked ready to bolt, her hands clutching the table's edge as if it might anchor her in place. You couldnât blame her. A woman already so anxious over the idea of magic she had positively turned green the moment she entered your flat. Now she was face to face with the dreaded Bucky Barnes, the fucking menace of the Sootstone? Many in The Warrens likely hadnât seen the man in person, maybe at a distance, or knew him through whispered tales. You certainly hadnât encountered the man until he came crashing into your life, smog and all.Â
âBucky,â you said, his name slipping out before you could catch it. A string of curses nearly left your tongue along with it. How bittersweet could it be that despite all the hurt you felt, you still called him by a name so familiar? Too familiar. The taste of it burned on your tongue. Your heart slammed into a furious rhythm as what could only be described as a smirk graced his lips. How could he act like he hadnât vanished from your life without so much as a goodbye?Â
How could he turn up here and act like all was well and normal?
It had hurt when he had left; yes, that was to be expected. But these past few days, he had avoided you. At least, it felt like avoidance. You hadnât heard a word from the Smog Boys since your beating at the hand of the Iron Rats, not even a whisper on the sharp winds that rolled in from the dock. Natasha would have told him. In what world would she not have told Bucky that his pet witch had missed the summons because she was trembling, bloodied and bruised on her own floor?Â
You had convinced yourself that maybe it was for the better, an escape from Beccaâs wrath and escape from the Smog BoysâŠ
âIâm busy.â The words escaped you before you could think.
He raised his brows in disbelief. Your toes curled in their boots, cringing at your own blunt tone. But then again, had he just expected everything to return to normal?
âI needâa favour.â He stepped further into the room, his boots thudding against the floorboards as he surveyed the space with casual indifference. His gait was smooth, gaze unbothered. A morbid part of you wished you could inspect his back and see the damage you caused. It didnât seem to bother him or impede his movements.
Ms. Crowley made a small, frightened noise, her trembling hands going to her locket as though it might ward off his presence. âIâperhaps I should come back laterâŠâ
âWhatâre you doinâ here?â you demanded, the words sharper than you intended, cutting over Ms. Crowleyâs muttering.Â
âAs I said, I needâa favour.â
Your hands clenched into fists at your sides, nails biting into your palms as you fought to keep your composure.Â
âA favour?â you repeated, the words dripping with scepticism. âAfter everythinâ, you show up here and ask for a favour?â
Ms. Crowley flinched at the tone of your voice, but you couldnât stop now. Buckyâs eyes narrowed slightly, the faintest crack in his facade of nonchalance.
âWatch it,â he warned, his voice low and dangerous. âYou donât want to push me.â
âAnd you donât want to push me neither, Barnes,â You shot back, planting your hands on the table. âYou donât get to leave without so much as a âthank youâ and then show up here, actinâ like I owe you somethinâ?â
âYou say that, spirit-raiser, butâŠâ He sucked on his teeth, a muscle in his jaw ticking as he looked down at you, hands casually tucked into his jacket pockets as he sighed through his nose. âI just spent the last four days cleaninâ up your mess.â
Your brows drew inward, confusion slipping through. The entire time you had spent in misery, licking your wounds and nursing your broken heart, he had been out there defending you?Â
A devilish expression crossed his face. âYou really thought you could, what? Walk on over to Grimrow unnoticed while under my protection? Do you realise how long it has taken me to talk the Rat King down from marching over the Sootline and waginâ war âcause of you?â
âThey crossed the Sootline. They pursued me.â You rebutted, though even your voice wavered, unsure.
âYeah.â His head tilted, eyes squinting. âYou better be praisinâ whatever fuckinâ witch god you follow, 'cause that little fuck up on their end is the only reason why youâre still here playinâ good little spirit-raiser.â
You swallowed. Hard.Â
ïżœïżœThey hurt me.â You confessed, voice steadying.
âYeah, I know. Nat told me. Good thing your pretty little face has all healed up. Thatâs your only fuckinâ worth to me right now after all the trouble youâve caused.â His words stung; maybe you wouldâve believed them true. But you got the sense he was being harsh for the sake of venting frustrations. He wouldnât even catch your eye as the insults rolled off his tongue.Â
For a moment, silence filled the room, thick with tension. You could feel Ms. Crowleyâs gaze on you. Buckyâs jaw tightened, his posture stiffening as his eyes finally lifted and bore into yours. His expression was unreadable, a carefully laid mask to cover whatever real emotion raged behind his stormy blue eyes.
Then, to your surprise, Ms. Crowleyâs feeble voice cut through the silence.Â
âI-I-I should go nowââ
You whirled around.
âNo,â you snapped, cutting her off before she could rise. Ms. Crowley froze, wide-eyed and trembling, her teacup rattling slightly in her unsteady hands. For a brief moment, you thought Bucky might let her stay, that heâd simply loom in the corner, his presence a warning but nothing more.
But then Bucky huffed a sharp breath, irritation flashing across his face as he shrugged out of his jacket.Â
âGet the fuck out,â he said bluntly, his tone leaving no room for argument, his eyes sliding to meet the older woman's as you made a noise close to a whimper. âAnd keep your fuckinâ mouth shut about all this.â
Her mouth opened and closed like a fish gasping for air, her gaze darting between the two of you. With a frightened nod, she scrambled to her feet, clutching her bag and locket close to her chest.
âApologies. I ainât sayinâ a thing. Not a word. I swear.â she stammered, her voice a whisper as she made a beeline for the door.
The moment the door clicked shut behind her, you turned to Bucky, a glare sharp enough to cut steel fixed on your face.
âYou didnât have to scare her off like that!â you snapped, grabbing the teacups and stalking toward the sink.
âA waste of fuckinâ time is what she was,â Bucky replied casually, his voice dripping with indifference.
âShe was a client,â you shot back, setting the cups into the sink with more force than necessary. âA payinâ client. I need clients, Barnes.â
Bucky leaned against the counter, arms folded, watching you. âYouâre actinâ like I donât pay you triple what theyâre offerinâ.â
You dipped your hands further into the soapy water, pressing your palms flat against the metal bottom as you sighed, momentarily closing your eyes in exasperation. âYou donât get to decide whoâs worth my time. This is my place. My work. You canât justââ
âI thought Nat was exaggeratinâ,â Bucky cut over you, his voice low but carrying an edge that made your stomach churn.
You stiffened, your grip on the cup tightening. âExaggeratinâ about what?â
âAbout this.â
Your eyes flew open as his hand caught your chin, tilting your face toward him with an infuriating gentleness. His thumb brushed over your jaw, skimming the faint bruise that lingered there, and his eyes narrowed as they traced the fading split in your lip. A shiver raced down your spine, and you jerked your head away, pulling free of his grasp.
âItâs nothinâ,â you muttered, returning to the sink.
âDonât look like nothinâ,â he countered, his tone sharp. âLet me see the rest.â
You froze, your hands hovering over the sink. âNo.â
âDonât be stubborn,â he snapped, moving closer. His voice dropped, carrying a dangerous edge. âI need to see what they did to you.â
You shook your head, your pulse roaring in your ears. âIt doesnât matter. Iâm fine.â
Bucky let out a low growl of frustration, and before you could react, his hand was on your shoulder, spinning you around to face him. His other hand went to your waist, tugging at the hem of your shirt.
âBucky, stop,â you protested, grabbing at his wrists. The soapy water made your hands slick, his skin slipping from your grasp. âThis isnâtââ
âQuit fightinâ me,â he said sharply, his eyes flashing with something raw and unyielding. âI need to know.â
His words silenced you, leaving you to stare up at him in stunned disbelief. The fight drained out of you, replaced by a reluctant acceptance as you lifted your hands, a trail of water rolling down to your elbows. Your head dipped, staring down at his shoes as droplets dripped onto his boots. With a defeated sigh, you rested your palms on his chest, pressing the wet skin into his buttoned shirt until you could feel the warmth of his body. With a grunt, he tugged your blouse from where it was tucked into your shirt, ripping the fabric upward until it exposed your belly.
The air seemed to leave the room as his gaze fell on the mottled bruises that painted your abdomen, the angry purples and blues. His jaw tightened, a muscle ticking as his hand hovered over the worst of the damage, his fingers brushing against your side with an uncharacteristic hesitance.
You heard him swallow audibly, adamâs apple bobbing. A shiver ran down your spine as his thumb carefully ran up to your sternum, then across the band of your brassiere.Â
âHow many ribs did you break?â he asked, his voice low and rough.
You sucked in a sharp breath as the hair across your body rose on end. Tingles blossomed across your skull as his hand swept down to the waistband of your skirt, tugging it down to inspect the damage still hidden.Â
âThree.â
His grunt of acknowledgement was quiet, but the tension dominating his frame was unmistakable. He stepped back abruptly, running a hand through his hair, tongue running over his bottom lip.
âWhy didnât you fight back?â The question gave you near vertigo.Â
âI did.â You lie through your teeth
The gangster shook his head, hands resting on his hips as he looked down at you.Â
âBullshit. Iâve seen what youâre capable of. Iâve felt it, doll.â Your gut clenched as he half motioned towards his back. âIf you wanted to fight back, they wouldâve been dead long before they touched you.â
You pause. He was right. He was entirely right. You hadnât fought back because you were what? Dejected and defeated? Too swept up in your own pity? Living in your mother's shadow? Or was it just the shadow you had created for yourself?
âYouâre punishinâ yourself, arenât ya? Hm?â
âIâm not lyinâ Barnesââ You begin to speak, voice raising as hysteria begins to bubble within you. Why was he asking you these things? Why was he pretending to care?
âWhy?â He cuts over you,Â
You turned away, refusing to respond. âI think you should leave now.â
He was silent for a beat. Then you heard the shuffle of clothing as he picked up his coat and swept it over his muscled shoulders. âI still need that favour.â
You sigh, an exaggerated noise as you spin to face him with a scowl. âWhat now? Canât it wait?â
âYouâre expected. At a meetinâ.âÂ
âMeetinâ?â You echoed.
âAbout what happened. With the Iron Rats.âÂ
âI thought you said you dealt with itââ You bite back, irritation flaring.Â
âWould you just shut your fuckinâ mouth for a second and listen?â Bucky cut over you, voice raised. You clamp your mouth shut in surprise.
âItâs the Rat King.â Bucky meets your gaze. âHe wants to meet you.â
â
You would have never described Bucky Barnes as nervous, but the walk to the Sootline almost had you questioning that assumption. Bucky kept his pace steady, though you noticed the subtle clench of his jaw and the occasional twitch of his hand at his side. It wasnât the demeanour of a nervous manâno, Bucky Barnes didnât do nervousâbut something unexplainable was simmering beneath the surface.
The streets of the Warrens were quieter than usual, the normal hum of life dampened. The sun had grown low in the sky, the usual grey fog warming to a diffused orange and pink glow. The cobblestones were slick beneath your boots, liquids you wouldnât dare identify, leaving a sheen across the ground that reflected the faint glow of lanterns. You adjusted your coat, tucking it closer against the chill, and cast a sidelong glance at Bucky.Â
"Barnes, you alright?" you asked cautiously, breaking the silence. You werenât one to pry, but the energy engulfing the gangster was strange.
âWeâre late,â he muttered, his voice clipped.
You frowned, the sharpness of his tone needling at you. âWell, if youâd told me sooner than five minutes ago that I was neededââ
âAnd you would have come?.â His words were abrupt, cutting through your protest like a blade. âYou do âave a habit of ignorinâ my summons.â
Your jaw clamped shut, a heavy silence falling over the both of you. Further down the twisting, wonky street, you could see streetgoers dashing into nearby stores and homes. Above in the stacked homes that towered above the streets, faces cautiously peeked out, watching as Bucky and you marched past. You observed a group of three children ushered away by their mother, her tightly shutting the rickety window with a grim expression.
âIt would be best if you kept your mouth shut during this. Only speak when spoken to. Just agree unless I say otherwise.â Bucky finally spoke, voice gruff.
âWhy?â You pry, voice unsure.
ââCause I canât help you if you say somethinâ stupid ân end up gettinâ yourself in more trouble.â
Your steps faltered, confusion flashing across your face. âWhy do you suddenly care?â
His lip twitched, but he continued with his persistent gait. âYou ask a lot of questions.â
âYouâre scarinâ meââ
âI have a reputation to uphold, spirit-raiser. Canât have these rats thinkinâ Iâve gone weak âcause of some bird.â
The words landed heavily, and you bit back the sting of their dismissal. âWhat does your reputation got to do with me?â
His stride didnât falter, but his gaze flicked toward you, brittle and intense. âIf I canât protect you, then whatâs to say I can protect the whole of The Warrens, huh? Whatâs to stop them from marchinâ over the Sootline?â
âSo, whatâs this, then? You strikinâ a deal, handinâ me over to them, actinâ like you donât care so they donât think youâre weak âcause of some bird?â
âIf I wanted you dead, youâd have been dead a long time ago.â He huffed out in an empty laugh. He stopped abruptly, turning to face you. The weight of his stare rooted you in place. âNo, doll, those rats⊠they fucked up.â
Your breath hitched in your throat as he continued, his voice low and deliberate, every word laced with venom. âIâm gonna get them to bend the fuckinâ knee. Show them whose the real fuckinâ King around here.â
â
The Sootline River separated the two territories like a jagged scar, its sluggish current carrying the cityâs filth toward the sea. On either bank, the Smog Boys and Iron Rats assembled in tense lines, a mix of swagger and unease flickering across their faces. The lanterns they carried swayed, casting fragmented shadows on the water as the sun finally slipped beyond the horizon, coating the land in creeping darkness, its coffin-like suffocation only exaggerated by the smoke and ash from the Smokestacks.
Bucky stood at the riverâs edge, his posture deceptively relaxed, his hands buried in his coat pockets. His gaze locked onto the figure across the river: Varlan CreyâThe Rat King. Varlan was everything Bucky wasnâtâbrash, loud, and lumbering, his bulk swathed in a tattered black coat with yellow stitching. His grin was wide, but his teeth were uneven, lending him the air of a predator more accustomed to snapping than scheming. His gang flanked him, a pack of diseased rats, restless and waiting for a signal.
âBarnes,â Varlan called, his voice carrying easily across the water, gravelly and full of mock cheer. âShame we ainât meetinâ unda different circumstances.â
âVarlan,â Bucky replied, his tone steady, almost clipped. He didnât move a muscle, his stance radiating a nearly unbearable calm.
Varlan cocked his head, his smirk widening. âIâm guessinâ this is the bird in question?â He nodded towards you.
You froze under his scrutiny, your skin prickling under the weight of his gaze. The air seemed colder now, and your chest tightened as though the riverâs chill had seeped into your bones.Â
Bucky gave a single, deliberate nod. âYes.â
Varlan snorted softly. âA bird from The Warrens, crossing inta my territories ân causing a ruckus amongst my boys⊠you undastand how this looks bad, Barnes?â
Bucky didnât flinch. His smooth and unhurried tone carried across the water like a blade. âI can. But it werenât her that was causing the ruckus now, was it? Iâm guessinâ these lies youâre tellinâ yourself are why you so recklessly declared war before examininâ the facts.â
Varlan chuckled, a low, rumbling sound that made the hairs on the back of your neck rise. âFacts,â he repeated, shaking his head as though the word itself amused him. âYouâre soundinâ more and more like them fancy wankers up in The Flower Districts, Barnes. Especially in those fine tailored suits a yours.â
A chorus of low laughter rumbled from the Iron Rats side of the bridge, the lines of men with their yellow handkerchiefs grinning amongst themselves.Â
âOh, I can recommend you a tailor, Crey,â Bucky said lightly, his voice laced with faint amusement. âI know one who gives discounts for friends.âÂ
It was now time for the Smog Boys to stir behind Bucky, muffled chuckles rippling through the crowd. A flicker of a smile ghosted across Buckyâs lips, though his gaze remained fixed on Varlan. With the subtle jab landed, Varlan bristled. His shoulders stiffened, and his smirk turned brittle. He barked a short laugh, more bark than humour.
âWell,â he said, his voice sharper now. âLetâs get to the heart of the matter, shall we?â
âGo ahead,â Bucky replied.
You glanced at him, searching for some clue about his thinking, but his expression gave away nothing. Beside you, the Smog Boys settled, hands tucked into their pockets and chests puffed out as they eyed the Iron Rats across the river. Their stillness wasnât as practised as Bucky's. He held the type of quiet that preceded violence, the kind that made your stomach churn. As you scanned their faces, you noted how young some men were, barely out of boyhood. It might have been a cause for concern, but you knew many sought out Buckyâs leadership out of desperation. Their energy was much better placed under the guidance of someone like Bucky instead of them turning to the streets where their violence and frustration would run rampant. Regardless of their age or status, you had noticed one common theme among the Smog Boysânone were left unfed, and their clothes were always without holes. The same could not be said for other less fortunate souls who braved The Warrens alone.Â
âI admit,â Varlan began, dragging out the word with a performative sigh. âThat I may âave been⊠hasty. But ya canât blame me, not with the information I was told.â
âI guess so,â Bucky replied simply.Â
Buckyâs lack of reaction agitated the larger man, a cross expression forming on his greasy face. Then his smirk returned, sly and serpentine. âWell, I am impressed by yaâŠlittle investigation. Touched a nerve, did it?â
A ripple of unease passed through you as Varlan Crey lifted his brows, head tilted to match his devious, wide-eyed expression. A subtle dig at Buckyâs involvementâor worse, his attachment to you? You swallowed hard, feeling the weight of both their gazes shift momentarily to you.Â
By some miracle, Bucky didnât react to the provocation. Instead, his voice came low and steady. âI take it you spoke with the witch?â
You felt your face react before you could steel yourself, face scrunching in confusion. Witch? What witch was Bucky referring to? He certainly wasnât referring to youâyou had never met the Rat King before, let alone spoke with him about your misdeeds of crossing into his territories. In retrospect, with the gravity of the situation weighing upon you, it was a foolish assumption to make thinking you could walk into Grimrow unimpeded or unidentified. In recent months, it seemed everyone and anyone knew who you were before you knew them. It was as if you walked your life with a ginormous red hot brand across your forehead that simply said: Bucky Barnes!
âSpoke? Yes,â Varlan said, his voice emerging in a drawl. âCome âere, girl.âÂ
He turned slightly, and a figure emerged from the Iron Ratsâ crowd.
Wanda.
Wanda.
Your chest tightened, bruising squeezing painfully. She walked forward with her usual unnerving grace, her head high, her eyes sweeping the scene before her. Her auburn locks bounced across her white dress, sheepskin draped over her shoulders to protect her from the chill. Coven garb. She was calm. Too calm. The shock of seeing her in the Church of Light clothing almost made you physically recoil. You had never seen the attire in the flesh, but you remembered how your mother had described itâwhite to symbolise the light and the chosen babe, the Light-bringer. Diviner.Â
The voices of the past echoed those names in your mind.
Light-bringerâŠ
Your mother had always been short in her tales, too afflicted by the trauma and illness that had ruled most of her life away from the Coven. She had only spoken of the cruelty and sickness in those temple walls. The white was purity, the end of times, the rapture⊠but also a symbol of their devotion. The crimson blood of their self-inflicted or sometimes forced punishments showed up best on a fresh canvas.Â
How had Wanda inserted herself in your life so quickly? How long had Leofric and his coven of fucking madness been tailing you? And how had Bucky known to bring her? You glanced at him, desperate for a flicker of understanding, but his face remained devoid of emotion.
âIt seems my friend, Barnes âere, is obsessed with facts.â The Rat King spoke, pulling you from your confused daze. He wheezed out a laugh, a phlegm-filled cough quickly following as he spat the glob into the filthy churning Sootline.
âGo on then, girl. State the facts.â Varlan instructed with a bark.
Wanda folded her hands in front of her, her voice level and composed. âI invited her to Grimrow.â
A surprised murmur swept over the crowd.
âThe Church of Light has been expanding its temple across the Sootline. I was honoured to become the Head Priestess for our new buildââ
âYeah, yeah, cut to the facts, girl.â Varlan cut over Wanda.Â
The auburn woman's eyes sparked with something that could only be described as irritation, but it was only a flicker as she expertly composed herself. âI invited her over to celebrate with me, as we have been friends since childhood.â
The word friends felt like a slap. Or even better, a well-placed stab to the abdomen. Your throat tightened as you stared at her, horrified by her ease in lying. How could she say it so smoothly? So convincingly? You tried to form words, but they caught in your throat, leaving you in silence.
âYou agree,â Varlan pressed, his voice breaking through your haze, âthat you were invited?â
Your lips parted, but no sound came, head spinning. Finally, you forced yourself to speak. âYes.â
Varlanâs sly eyes narrowed, assessing you. âYou say you are both friends but⊠the bartender and my men witnessed a fight between ya both,â he said, his tone deceptively casual. âWhy?â
Wanda quickly stepped in, her voice carrying a faint trace of sorrow. âI had expressed my concern. I wished she would stop workinâ for the Smog Boys out of fear for her safety.â
Varlanâs amusement flickered across his face, but you caught the subtle way his eyes darted toward Bucky. It was a jab meant to provoke. Bucky didnât bite. He remained as unmoving as stone.
âAnd what do you say?â Varlan asked, turning his attention back to you.
Wandaâs eyes burned into your own, her chin lifting. You couldâve sworn you saw the ghost of a smirk across her lips as she watched you squirm. You couldnât claim she was lying, or this elaborate fabrication would fall apart. You couldnât gauge her motive. Was it to make you feel you owed her and the Church of Light? Was it to protect you? Plant seeds of doubt within Bucky, and make it seem like you had hidden parts of your life from him?
âSheâs tellinâ the truth,â you surrender, the lie tasting bitter on your tongue.
âAnd do you have evidence? Of this letter sent to you to invite you?â
Your stomach dropped further, quickly scrambling to come up with a believable lie. âNo⊠No, I burn all my old mail. I use it as kindlinâ.â
âConvenient,â Varlan spat out with a slow shake of his head. âVery convenient.â
âI have evidence,â Wanda interjected smoothly, producing a rolled parchment from somewhere on her person. âIt is the reply she sent me, confirminâ the date.â
Buckyâs shoulders subtly relaxed beside you. Had he known about the lie, or was he being strung along by her games, too? Had the two spoken as well? What lies had she told him? Worst of all was the flare of jealousy in your gutâthe thought of him talking with that woman, the idea of him trusting her over youâthe weight of betrayal was suffocating. Wanda had gone to unimaginable lengths, forging a note in your handwriting to solidify this ruse.
âYou wrote this reply?â Varlan asked, holding the parchment aloft.
âYes.â Your tongue felt thick in your mouth.
Varlan examined the note for a long moment before nodding. âWell, seems youâre right, Barnes. My men were in the wrong. â
âSo, we have an understanding now, Crey?â Bucky asked, his voice steady.
âBelieve we do, Barnes,â Varlan replied. âYour woman can walk free.â
Buckyâs jaw tightened almost imperceptibly, his hand flexing at his side. For a moment, he didnât respond; his cold blue eyes locked on Varlan like a wolf sizing up its prey.
âThatâs it?â Bucky asked, his voice low, dangerously calm. âShe walks free, and weâre supposed to call it even?â
Varlan spread his hands in a gesture of mock generosity. âWhat more do you want, Barnes? She crossed into my territory. Iâve agreed to let her go, no harm done. This should be the end of it.â
Bucky let out a quiet laugh, shaking his head. He glanced down at you briefly, his expression unreadable, before looking back at Varlan. âNo harm done? Is that what ya think?â
âSheâs standinâ here, ainât she?â Varlan said, his tone oily, his confidence growing in the face of no immediate retaliation. âNo blood spilt, no lastinâ damage. Consider this aâŠgenerous gesture from me.â
Buckyâs eyes narrowed, his expression hardening. Without another word, he stalked toward the bridge.
The movement drew startled murmurs from both sides.
âWhatâs he doinâ?â one of the Iron Rats hissed, his hand twitching toward his weapon.
âHold!â Varlan snapped. âLet him come if he wants.â There was a cool confidence to his tone, a confidence that was likely misplaced.Â
âBarnes,â Varlan said, his voice rising as Bucky drew closer with deliberate, measured steps. âThere ainât no need for this. Iâve said the matter is settled.â
Bucky said nothing as he reached the other side. His hand slid into his coat, and when it emerged, he held a knife. The blade gleamed in the lantern light, its sharp edge catching the flickering flames.
The Iron Rats stiffened as if momentarily stunned and unable to make a move.
âLetâs be clear,â Bucky said quietly, his voice cutting through the tension like the edge of his blade. âYou think you can cross me, threaten a woman under my protection, and walk away with a few pretty words? Is that what ya think, Crey?â
Varlan stepped back instinctively, his misplaced confidence crumbling as Bucky loomed over him. âBarnes, this is unnecessaryââ
Bucky moved faster than anyone expected. His boot struck Varlanâs chest in a brutal kick, sending the Rat King sprawling onto his back. Gasps erupted from the Iron Rats, a few finally thawing out enough to jerk forward, but were quickly off-put their heroism by the crowd of Smog Boys inching across the bridge, blades drawn and faces like jackals.
At some point in the chaos, you had lost sight of Wanda, the witch disappearing into the shadows and fog like a ghost in the night.
Varlan scrambled backwards, his hands raised in a panicked gesture of surrender. âWait! Barnes, wait!â
Bucky crouched over him, the knife hovering dangerously close to Varlanâs throat. âYa think this is a game, Crey? Well, letâs fuckinâ play then, huh?â he spat.Â
âIâI didnât mean for any of this!â Varlan stammered, his voice high with panic. âI swear, Barnes. Please!â
âBeg,â Bucky said, his voice cold and unrelenting.
Varlanâs face twisted with humiliation, but the knife at his throat left no room for pride. Slowly, he rose to his knees, his hands still outstretched in surrender but his entire form trembling.
âIâm sorry,â he choked out. âI was wrong. Please.â
âLouder,â Bucky demanded.
âIâm sorry!â Varlan cried, his voice cracking. âYou can âave the men, do what ya want with âem. Is that what you want? Please⊠justââ
Bucky gripped his balding head with a firm grip, directing Varlanâs watery, terrified eyes to look across the Sootline at you. You had a sudden epiphany, an understanding that Bucky had never been nervous. No. That strange energy, that twitchiness⊠it had been pure, unfiltered rage.
âNow, say sorry to her.â Bucky instructed, his voice near seething.
âI am sorry! Iâm sorry for me actions. And my mens.â The Rat King cried out. Your gaze lifted to meet Buckyâs as he stared back across the Sootline at you. His grip on the manâs head tightened. âPlease!â
âBucky.â You finally spoke up, your voice soft as the breeze as it carried across the river.
As if your brief speech had broken a spell cast across the gangster, Bucky immediately straightened, his expression calm as he sheathed the knife. He reached out and patted Varlanâs head mockingly.
âGood little rat,â he murmured. âYou know, Iâm hostinâ a party soon. Maybe Iâll invite you, and you can dance and entertain me like the fuckinâ jester you are.â
Varlanâs humiliation was evident, his men exchanging uneasy glances. Bucky grinned wide, showing all his teeth.
âAs for the men,â He said, his tone sharp as he turned to face the crowd of Iron Rats head-on. âThe ones who crossed the border. Hand them over.â
Varlan hesitated for a moment, his pride still clinging stubbornly. But the weight of Buckyâs gaze, the threat of what he might do, was too much to bear. He nodded quickly, motioning to his men.
As if not wanting to anger the gangster further, the Iron Rats were quick to locate the three culprits and push them ahead, their expressions ashen with terror. Smog Boys emerged from the mist like spectres, grasping the men and dragging them across the bridge before they could escape and bolt back into the depths of Grimrow.
âTake them,â Varlan said hoarsely, his body sunken in defeat. âTheyâre yours.â
Bucky didnât even look at them. He turned and crossed the bridge, hand grasping your forearm as he tugged you along. You frantically looked back, watching through the filthy haze as Varlan Crey stumbled back to his feet, cheeks burning, forehead slick with sweat. His men around him looked dejected, their beady eyes following you as you disappeared into the smog.
âCome,â Bucky uttered to you. âWe have business to attend to.â
#bucky x reader#bucky barnes#bucky fanfic#bucky barnes fanfiction#bucky x you#bucky x y/n#james buchanan barnes#bucky barnes x you#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes smut#bucky smut#james bucky barnes#bucky barnes x y/n#bucky barnes x female reader#bucky x female reader#marvel#marvel fic#marvel au#gangster au#fantasy au#au#smog & spirits
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hii hehe,just before I request I wanted to say thaf I enjoy your fics a lot!! But do you think I could get Abby who gets home late fron partol to reader sound asleep but sheâs just so needy and pent up from today patrol she canât keep her hands to herself? It could be dom or sub doesnât matter just need her to grind my ass
The promise.
a/n: I'm so sorry it took me forever! Also I suck at writing smut so I hope this lives up to your expectations. I'd really appreciate feedback from you!
cw: porn with barely minimum plot, somnophilia, ass humping (r!receiving), strap-on usage (a!receiving), dom!reader, sub!abby, hair pulling.
wc: 2200k.
As always, Abby had lost rock paper scissors against whoever-the-fuck it was this time. And as always, now she'd have to do the latest patrol, as you so much hated since you didn't have your pretty girl to cuddle you and help you sleep.
Now, Abby was frustratingly getting ready for patrol. As it was spring, she didn't need to put much clothes on. Easier to take off. You stared at her up and down as she took off her pajama shorts and tank top, leaving her in only her underwear. She acted so nonchalant while you were getting wetter and wetter with every single move she made, it was frustrating.
"You look so hot." You praised her, looking up at the big woman from your place on the bed. Your voice came out sultrier than ever, you were so turned on.
The look in your eyes, fiery, almost predatory, didn't go unnoticed by Abby. She carved a need in you so effortlessly it almost scared her, like you would never get tired of playing with her pink little hole. It was also one of the things she loved about you.
Abby's initial instinct when she noticed the tone in your voice was to look at the clock in your bedside table. She was already late.
"We can't, babe." She warned you as she put a grey tank top on that hugged her figure and made her biceps stand out.
"Why not? You'll be a few minutes late." You insisted with fake innocence, sitting up and already taking off your shorts.
"Last time you said that you tied me up for three hours." She retorted sternly as she finished pulling her pants up, trying to sound resentful as if she hadn't loved it. You snickered internally at the memory.
"You should learn about forgiveness." You said with a roll of your eyes as you took Abby's your oversize shirt off.
"When I get home you can fuck me." She promised you with a smile, showing her eagerness in her oh so beautiful eyes.
"But it's like... Three hours!" You complained. "I'll have to wait too much." You pouted slightly.
"Go to bed early, yeah? I'll eat you up as soon as I come back." The golden haired girl asked you gently, about to close the door behind her instead of giving up to your desires.
"No, baby, I promise I won't." You reassured fervently, even if she was asking for quite the opposite.
"I'll wake you up." She promised, as many times before.
"You're lying." You accused her, seeing right trough her lie.
Abby always told you white lies, and it was irritating at times. Telling you she'd wake you up when she came from a late patrol, saying she's not injured, lying to protect your poor heart. But it felt just annoying sometimes, so annoying you wanted to push her against the nearest surface and finger her until she forgot her own name.
"I'm not. I'll wake you up, yeah?" She insisted softly.
You wanted to make sure she woke you up this time. You sat up and walked to her, holding her hand and bringing specifically her middle and ring finger to your cunt. You moved your panties to the side and massaged yourself with her fingers, wettening quickly due to the slick that formed just by just seeing her changing clothes.
As you did that, you stared up at her, looking right into her blue eyes.
"You'll wake me up, will you?" You asked as you rubbed her fingers against your clit desperately, making you gasp.
"I..." She was at loss for words; you never failed to turn her on. "I will." She affirmed, a bit more surely this time as her voice turned breathy.
She quickly pulled her hand away from your underwear and walked out quickly before the temptation took over her and you found yourself dressing up again with annoyance.
You'd stay up, waiting for her. You'd show her.
Abby entered the house, tired from staying up for so long. Luckily she was not hurt; she didn't even face any infected or scar. It had been a quiet and unnecessary patrol, but at least she had had Manny by her side to keep her awake.
Even if in the first hour of patrol she had been eagerly thinking about coming back home and riding your thigh, or taking your fingers, or whatever you wanted her to do, she was too tired to wake you up and have sex. You could do it in the morning, like always.
That's the opinion she maintained until she opened the door to your shared room. There you were, as beautiful as a devil, sleeping like an angel. The only piece of clothing you had on was that lacy g string she loved so much, face down with a pillow between your legs. Her pillow.
All the neediness you gave her before patrol came back and crashed her down like a tsunami, drowning her in lust at the mere sight of your sleeping form as the ache between her thighs returned.
You had, indeed, did that on purpose, ensuring you fell asleep on that position.
She wouldn't wake you up, not when you looked so tired... She would be quiet, and gentle. Your ass was already up, maybe she could hump it. You had done the same with her other times and she woke up, but that was because she was a light sleeper... It wouldn't be the same for you.
As she finished reasoning, she quickly walked to the bathroom to clean her hands and came back to the bed. In a record time, she got rid of her boots and clothes, trying not to make any noise.
She jumped to the bed beside you and started rubbing slow, strong circles around her pulsating clit while she stared at your sleeping self, all quiet and pretty. It was all good until she realised she needed more.
Then she tried straddling your thigh and grinding on it. After one or two minutes, she gave up. It wasn't good enough.
She finally moved to your ass, which provided her the firmness she needed, the flesh being jiggly and perfect for her to ride, as if your ass was made for her to grind her pussy against it.
Time passed by as she grew needier and faster. Her pace slowly but surely grew rougher, her whimpers louder, and you already were soaked with her juices and she wasn't even that close to cumming.
A particularly rough grind, followed by a loud cry of your name, abruptly brought you back to lucidness. You felt Abby's weight over you, and at first you just didn't care. You fucked her when she wa asleep, she did too. No worries.
But then you remembered her promise.
The way she was using your poor sleeping body for herself, not even deigning to keep her word and wake you up to fuck you made your blood boil. How could she break such an important promise?
You waited until you felt her get weaker, her hands trembling at your sides. That's when you shifted, trying to get up and ruining her orgasm, what left Abby frozen in a mix of excitement and fear. You could be dangerous when she wasn't good or honest.
She immediately got off of you and you turned around, feeling her wetness all over your right buttcheek.
"I thought I told you to wake up." You reminded her, your voice already threatening even if you were still under the effect of sleepiness.
"Babe, you looked so peaceful sleeping..." She excused herself, her voice trembling and breathy. "I just wanted to cum." She said weakly with those doe eyes you loved, rubbing her thighs together as she tried to get back the pleasure she was feeling a few moments ago, but it was no use.
"Ass up now." You commanded, opening the drawer to take your clear strap. You quickly put it on, adjusting it, and climbed to the bed. You were still sleepy.
By the time you had finished adjusting it, Abby was already in her fours, back arched and her big, juicy ass on display just for you.
"Hmm, and now you're pretending to be a good girl." You said mischievously as you kneeled in front of her. "But I don't think you were. You promised to wake me up." You brought it up again, your voice cruel as you held the fake dick in your hand and introduced her in her mouth.
She tried to talk, but all that came out was a choked gagging. You took the strap out, wettened by her saliva in a way that made your walls clench.
"I'm so sorry. Didn't want to disturb your sleep." She gasped out, seemingly desperate for you to use your strap in her cunt and not just making her suck it.
"Too late." You retorted, and she knew from that tone in your voice that she wouldn't be treated any nicely.
"Please fuck me." She begged you, staring at you from her position.
"I was already planning on doing so." You admitted, your voice softening for a moment. "But first, suck it." You commanded, pushing your dick into her mouth roughly; she barely had time to open her mouth.
You spent around three minutes just making her suck your strap, making sure she got desperate. You didn't feel anything but an almost nonexistent brush against your clit, but the sight of her swallowing as much as she could from you almost made you feel like the silicone was a part of you, filling her mouth with precum.
Your clit pulsed so violently that you just pulled her braid back to stop her. You leaned against the headboard, still kneeling.
"Please." She pleaded almost religiously, as she should. Her blue orbs stared right into your soul, filling it with a sinful mix of compassion and lust. You would've loved to make her suck your strap and beg for you much more, but you also needed her. You yanked at her braid a little harder, earning a soft moan from her throat.
"There's no please. If you want me then fuck yourself on me." You replied simply in an icy yet mocking tone, hoping to fullfill your own needs.
She turned around and positioned herself with her ass right against your strap. She started moving up and down, letting the tip of the silicone rub against her, making her even more wet than she was already from her previous orgasm.
She then finally let your dick slide easily inside of her, letting out a soft whimper of relief.
"You're so wet." You mocked her.
"I just missed this..." She sighed out as she started bouncing back against you, using enough force so she was hitting your clit just the way you needed it.
Her braid was right there, adorning her back, inviting you. You yanked it back, drawing out a gasp from her and seemingly motivating her to get herself off on you with more force than before. Her pace was slow, but firm. Her ass bounced and slapped against you in that way that would leave you dazzled and drooling every time.
She grew needier and needier as time passed by, becoming more desperate and unable to speed up due to the position in which she was. You noticed she was close to cumming, probably due to her own arousal rather than because of the little amount of pleasure she was receiving from you.
You noticed her legs started trembling. That's when you placed your hands in her waist and started slamming your hips against her with no mercy, not only for her but also because you needed more friction against your clit.
You felt so close now that you were the one strapping her and not her fucking herself on you since you could apply as much force as you needed for the base of the strap to rub your clit just right. Your climax was slowly approaching you, and so was Abby's.
You started thrusting faster and harder. Since the whole time you hadn't made a move, you had enough stamina to fuck her as hard as you wanted, slamming into her walls rapidly.
"Can I... Babe..." She cried out loudly, clearly affected by your pace. Your hand gripped the back of her hips tightly, moving them as you pleased against you to get that sweet relief you needed.
"Yes! Oh my god, Abby, yes!" You screamed, already cumming. A loud moan followed by a trail of curses came out of your mouth as you moved faster, riding out your orgasm.
Abby's orgasm crashed her like a wave, slow but intense enough to drown her in pleasure.
"Fuck! Yes baby there there there...." She begged until she started babbling stupidly, encouraging you to push the strap deeper and deeper inside of her pretty pussy.
You kept going and ruthing your dick into her at that same relentless pace until she started sobbing and gripping the bed sheets hard. You weren't really into overstimulation; seeing Abby uncomfortable made your heart twist and clench and want to stop working. So as soon as you noticed her orgasm had already gone, you gave her one last thrust before sliding out of her entrance and kissing her cheek.
"Eat me out as you promised and we'll go to sleep, alright?" You asked demanded her sweetly.
#cattjull reqs#cattjul#abby anderson#lesbian#abby x reader#abby anderson x reader#abby tlou#abby x you#abby anderson smut#abby the last of us#abby anderson tlou2#sub!abby#dom!reader#abby x y/n#abby x fem!reader#tlou#tlou2#tlou abby#abby anderson x female reader#abby anderson fanfic
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actually I love Tentoo and he is the Doctor and it was the only ending for Rose that worked and it is a huge gift to be able to have the man she loves grow old with her, they were always heading for that, y'all be quiet. I 100% understand the angst but it's okay, they're okay, good ending-
#did you want her to...not end up with the doctor?#she ended up with the doctor. she ended up with the doctor and they get to AGE together#they get to have a real honest relationship the way they both always genuinely wanted#it's hard that the full time lord version has to carry on without her but that is the way that character's story ALWAYS goes#the doctor does not get to keep ANYONE. it would be a different show if he did#meanwhile there is a version of that same face of his - the one that was MADE for love? particularly born out of love for ROSE? the one 1/2#2/2 that always wanted a FAMILY? and stability? and a normal life? the tenth doctor longed for that specifically because of rose#now he gets to have it AND be part-human so he doesn't have to watch her get old. he gets old WITH HER#and they're canonically growing their own Tardis so you don't even have to be sad that they're not adventuring in time and space as usual#because they ARE. it's the kindest ending for either character. and if the full time lord hadn't left without either of them-#-he would have had to lose them eventually. lose Rose because she's human? hello? painful? but instead he was selfless and left her-#-with a proper happy ending. which she CHOSE to have so you can't be like âhe tricked her!â she chose to kiss one of them and it was Tentoo#they are the same man. Rose won in this scenario.#and I GET IT I am with Billie Piper I think it will always feel a little off that she was left with Tentoo and not the full time lord#I understand. it still makes me a little sad. but I know it's a good ending writing-wise. really the ONLY ending.#yes I know about the popular idea of Immortal!Rose or Bad Wolf Rose or whatever and that's cute and all BUT - it's not a GOOD thing#it's not PREFERABLE to be immortal. Rose doesn't want to live forever. she wants to be with the man she LOVES forever.#she doesn't want to not die or adventure for all time. she wants to be there to hold his hand. and when Tentoo is born she gets THAT!#Immortal!Rose is tragic. the Doctor would not wish the burden of immortality on the woman he loves HELLO#anyway#I ship timepetals. that includes Tentoo/Rose. because he is the doctor#so there#I have more thoughts on Tentoo specifically but I digress#maybe if provoked in an Ask or something idk#doctorrose#timepetals#opinion piece#tenrose#tentoo#handy
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My brilliant shining thing
#Donât ask me to talk about wakabaâs relation to Utena I WILL go on for hours#the âyouâre my best friend! Iâm going to save you!â Scene required my brain chemistry#and the way that theyâre not ever as close as they were after thatâŠ#like I def feel like Wakaba had one of those âgirl crushesâ on Utena#where she admired her and loved her and wanted to be with her but thought it was a straight girl thing#in the manga she gets jealous over Anthy and says that sheâll be the mistress if Anthy is the wife#anyways#au eggs#Utena#Utena tenjou#wakaba shinohara#Rgu#revolutionary girl utena#OH I FORGOT. THE ENTURE POINT OF THIS DRAWING#the way that Wakaba knows sheâs a side haracter!!#sheâs doomed to be forever unimportant#and meanwhile has a crush on the main character she doesnât even know aboutâŠ
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Roger really DOES have mad girldad energy and I am feral.
Welcome to my walls btw, it's hot af in Florida, so lmk if you need a popsicle/hj
Just. Omfg imagine Toki and Buggy bonding SO MUCH and Toki is the one who helps Buggy find Her Style and Her Confidence. Oden also has Big Himbo Dad Emergy too, so I bet he'd just be like ":000 a GIRL! WONDERFUL!!! I shall have TWO daughters!"
Roger ofc takes big offense to that and it becomes a shipwide brawl over who gets to be her dad, and Buggy is just laughing, crying, pickpocketing everyone. Only like. Three fellas even have the driving NEED to call her their daughter, they just love the chaos. Shanks is just left GAPING bc ofc he loves Buggy, he always has, always will, but the way she was smiling, the way she's just beaming at the acceptance, no matter how dramatic it is - by Davy Jones, it steals his breath away.
Whatever you do tho, don't imagine Toki dressing Buggy up in traditional Wano attire. Don't imagine Toki taking on the role of aunt or big sister and sharing this culture with Buggy. Teaching her the ways of warriors from her homeland, the codes and dress and recipes. Don't imagine Toki telling Buggy "family secrets" like recipes, fighting styles, etc. Don't imagine Toki just easily saying that of course Buggy needs to know these things! Blood is but the fluid of life, and love is what makes a family - and Buggy has so much love to give, so much to receive, and Toki calls her a child of Wano in heart and soul, in all the ways that matter should Buggy want that.
And Buggy, who has only ever wanted to BELONG, oh she accepts without hesitation.
Leaving Toki behind was hard, but she gifts Buggy an heirloom of sorts, a hair piece that she keeps either tucked under her beanie or safe in a chest, anchored to the floor of her room ((or hidden carefully with Devil Fruit powers)).
The day Toki manages to make/get a suitably sized kimono for Buggy, maybe for a party on the ship, maybe a birthday celebration ((and here I insert my Wano Culture Headcanons, that there's a birthday where children transition to young adults, and it's similar to a quinceñera but different, partially because it's done at 13, and then a second one at 18, a five year period of growth, life compared to butterflies, and so Toki convinces the crew to do these for the Cabin Kids-))
Buggy comes out, hair done, kimono flawless and bright and bold and so very her, a quiet joy on her face, and the crew is FLABBERGASTED.
Roger is sobbing.
Rayleigh has suddenly aged 20 years because oh shit oh gods she's going to be beautiful as an adult, oh damn it all he's gonna have to beat men off of her-
Shanks is caught between swooning, wanting to tackle her, and remembering just how the heck breathing works.
((Roger, Rayleigh, Crocus and Oden do rock paper scissors to get the first dance with her, and it dissolves into a fist fight somehow. Shanks gets involved and bites them. Toki takes the first dance.))
I have. So many emotions about transfem Buggy, bestie, send help it's all my brain can think about.
It's okay, I miss hot weather because here in Spain I am freezing and I am a spring child. My spiritual flower is a sunflower. I need the SUN. I NEED TO GO INTO THE FLAMES. So I'll stay there happily.
Please, Toki would so adopt Buggy. And Oden would be THRILLED. He'll see them getting along and he'd instantly say they look like mother and daughter. Buggy would be shy about it but Toki would probably laugh and say "Oh! Do we really? What do you think, Bugs?" and it's just,, So sweet,, Oden loves her a lot and he can't wait to see his Hiyori grow up too. Roger would be FURIOUS when he hears that because he "found her first" which, you know, true, but it's a weird way of saying that's his daughter. Anyway- Rayleigh would be so fucking done with everything. They'd fight about it and Buggy would actually have the time of her life because she feels important and flashy for once in a long time, and she'd laugh oh so beautifully at them when talking with Shanks about it in their room. Like she'd just laugh at the situation and Shanks is still not getting used to his very very not platonic feelings for his best friend. But he'd enjoy his time with her. He's just going a bit insane.
I can't stop thinking now about Buggy finally finding a place to belong. She's been lost for so long,, Feeling left out. And now Toki has gifted her with the most precious treasure there is: A home. Belonging. And I am so so emotional right now. Toki would be so proud of her and Buggy would just be so thankful. If Buggy called her 'mom' at some point, she'd feel embarrassed right away, but Toki would probably fight the tears and hug her close. Going crazy, really. All the men in Buggy's life fighting for her first dance,, Rayleigh just knows he'll have to fight all the men that hurt his precious star. And Shanks is starting to think about that too and the thought of Buggy dating somebody else makes him sick, so perhaps he needs to start with a plan to confess finally (he's so asking Toki about it. I'm gonna cry). Roger crying because he wants to enjoy every second he has left with her... It kills me.
I just know that to this day, Buggy still thinks about Toki as her mom. She never mentions it to anybody, but she feels such a strong connection to Wano and she's dying to go there finally someday. She might have not been born there, but her soul belongs there. And it's just so sweet. I am sobbing, thank you. Every time she does her hair, she feels Toki's hands instead of hers and she remembers everything she taught her,,,
Now I have on my mind a very silly Shuggy thought about Shanks trying to flirt with Buggy but failing miserably (because he's a kid and he only knows how to tease her or follow Roger's advice which are, um, not good) and Buggy just being so done and exhausted. She can't stand him! He's so annoying! Sometimes she doesn't know if she wants to punch him or kiss him! And she doesn't even know if Shanks likes her back because he keeps acting stupid. And she goes to Toki for advice and she's like "oh, darling... Men are stupid. Do you know why you felt smarter than them when you were unaware of being a girl? Well, one of the reasons is that Shanks is a kid. He's dumb. But he loves you and cares so much for you... He's just having a hard time trying to make his way to your heart" / "But he-! He's so damn- Ugh. He's such an idiot. He already did, and he just doesn't know because he can't see it and I can't stand him-" / "Well, maybe you should be the one telling him, huh?" / "What?! No! And give him the satisfaction of thinking I fell first?! I'd rather die. No. He has to make the first move". And now Toki is involved (like the rest of the crew because Shuggy is a whole teen drama) in their love story because Buggy keeps complaining about men being stupid and Shanks keeps saying he doesn't get how Buggy can't see he's in love with her.
#i think we're soulmates anon you always write exactly what i'm thinking :((#this is just so beautiful i am sobbing and now i want to write countless fics about this#god i swear this whole thing made my day#thank you so much for your asks really <333#fem buggy lives in my mind rent free forever i love her so much she's so important to me#one piece#buggy the clown#fem buggy#kozuki toki#roger pirates#red haired shanks#shuggy
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what happened to Carmen? Why did she die? What was her illness? How did Dahlia react? Did their parents know about them dating?? Is there a song that reminds you of them?
Sorrryyy i just love sapphics lol
DONT BE SORRY THIS MAKES ME REALLY HAPPY TO ANSWER HFJDKSJFYR
So carmen has been sick since she was young. Not the type of sickness that she needs to spend her life in the hospital, but does need extra care. Over the course of the story she coughs a bit and trips to show her body starting to weaken. She passed because it just kinda caught up to her. She spent a week in the hospital before dying.
Dahlia was heartbroken. She knew Carmen was sick since they started dating. She was also the only one carmen was honest about her fears with at first. Carmen never cried with Ăngel or her parents for a while cause she wanted to be brave for them. She only ever cried with Dahlia. When she died Dahlia was inconsolable. She did, however, try to stay strong for Ăngel. They hugged and cried together a lot. Carmen told Dahlia she wanted her to move on after her passing and be happy with a different person, but Dahlia only smiled and responded "as long as my heart is beating it's yours." This is in reference to a song (it's a musical) that carmen sang to Dahlia where that line is part of the chorus
The parents did know. To preface: Ăngel sr. is catholic and Alma was catholic at one point but now is not. Carmen came out to her mother first. Alma is a pretty old fashioned woman. She wished Carmen would date a man and said so point blank. She said some pretty hurtful things (she didn't mean to hurt carmen but still she thinks younger generations are just sensitive.) It wasn't until Alma had a heart to heart with Dahlia, that she started to grow on her (I just finished writing the heart to heart in case anyone wants more details on that) Carmen was kinda scared to tell her dad after what happened with her mom (especially since Ăngel sr is religious) she tearfully went to her father and her dad was like ???? cause he has no idea how to connect with his kids. She said "I like girls." and her dad just smiled and said "I know, baby." She started like fully crying and after that they had an introspective deep conversation about religion. Carmen is also religious, but never felt guilt in the gay regard. "How could something so natural be wrong?" Her dad is pretty much on the same page. (if y'all want the details on that convo lmk hehehe)
Dahlia and Ăngel jr are not religious. There was a stick cross near the outside their home and they when she passed both coped differently. Dahlia, for the first time since she was young, said a prayer by the cross. Ăngel spits on it and said "Fuck you, man." I like this scene cause at the end of the day, they both think they're talking to nothing, but the symbol of the cross changes to them after Carmen's death
As for songs that remind me of them...here are two playlists :D (still updating as I find more songs)
Happy one
Sad one
#skyj80yaps#original character#oc#sapphic#PLS ASK ME THINGS IM LIKE A SOCCER MOM WHO WANTS TO TALK ABOUT HER KIDS#I WOULD LOVE YOU FOREVER#ĂĄngelito
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Guess who :3c (Patreon)
#My art#Webkinz#Diamond#Ukadevlog#Ghostkinz#Ta-dah! My November behind-the-scenes project was this! The poll was for this reason! Though I already knew I'd start with her haha#Have a little preview to start us off - I have Lots of thoughts to each part of development I ended up in but I want to roll them out slowly#Not everything all at once anyway haha - thoughts get all jumbled now that I'm on this side of things pft#I wasn't able to finish A Version I'd be willing to publish in just a month - even then I only worked on Ghostkinz about 3 days a week so#But for the time I spent I'm quite pleased with how its shaped up so far! :D I got to implement a lot!#Actually learning-then-implementing-then-learning-then-implementing - it's a loop I've been out of for such a long time now :0#Really interesting to fall back into after so long away haha#A lot of my other projects have been Pick Up One Thing and then do that forever and I was tired-tired of that!!#So going into this project knowing that I'd only have November to Get Guud at as much of it as possible and then that was it#I think it helped propel me - didn't end with me getting stuck on Perfecting Just This One Thing#I'd read a bit and then go utilize it and then come back and read some more of Zarla's template/walkthrough - compelling system!#I still couldn't manage to actually finish in a month but I got up to Phase 4!! Previous attempts at Ghost-making has gotten stalled at 1!!#Maaaybe 2 but never anything beyond that - and while I didn't actually Finish any Phase apart from 1 I still read through much much more!#On top of the learning aspect being fun âȘ getting to understand some of the more technical side ahh - it was also just fun to read haha#Like a course that can be silly hehe â« Enjoyable even outside of getting to make a little guy for my screen haha#But also yes that too!! I'm really glad I finally settled on an idea that I feel confident in seeing through#The best part about reaching for the Webkinz style is that Webkinz uses vectors - I've gone on record multiple times as loving vectors#They're an exceptionally easy medium to manipulate and that was The Thing that had been holding me back from committing to Ghosts prior#Drawing every single thing when I already struggle to plug in my tablet...no...... But Vectors#You can see here that Diamond's expressions are just a matter of tilting her head and moving her tail - so so soooo simple with vectors#Being able to super-quickly put out a lot of different expressions and animations and piecemeal everything together...yes..........#And for what further I have in mind :3c It's really all I could ask for in an art style to seek ah âȘ Just right for my purposes!#I thought it'd be nice to show off Diamond-for-real as her plush next to her digital version as well :D She's still the only OG8 I have#I want more!! I'd love to have a code for her as well haha - secretly just started this so I can have a digital Diamond lol#Plush-Diamond actually wears a necklace these days but I opted to leave it off her for the photoshoot - maybe once I figure out clothes haha
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âHe'd deceived her, had lied to her. This man who she'd believed held no secrets between them. She didn't know why it made her want to shred everything within sight.â
â cause um⊠as you just said Miss Manon YOU CARE (& itâs even giving Chaolaena vibes in the I CARE way)⊠so like all Iâm saying is you love him duh?
#Chapter 40#Kingdom of Ash#Sarah J. Maas#no spoilers please#Manon Blackbeak#Dorian Havilliard#first read#read with me#read along#more quotes notes reacts and spoilers in tags and not course post for chapter#Blueblood and Yellowlegs and Blackbeak alike.' And she would bear the weight of what she'd created what she'd trained forever.#I want to bring them all home. Before it is too late before they become something unworthy of a homeland.#So what are you going to do? Asterin asked softly but not weakly.#the fact Asterin is described as speaking softly but not weakly#The answer did not lie in picking one over the other Crochan over Ironteeth. It never had.#He'd known and hadn't told her. Kaltain had vanished into the night air and then Dorian had shifted. Into a beautiful proud raven.#our beautiful proud bluebell eyed definetly not bored Raven boy bb prince king lovey#knew there was nothing kind nothing warm on her face. A witch's face. Blackbeak's face.#but your not a witch manon#His eyes glowed like blue fire. â intrigue normally they say that for Aelin#My road leads to Morath. It always has. How can you have looked at Kaltain and not seen what awaits you?#I love the full circle of Kaltain#We will lose this war if I do not go he snapped. How do you not care about that? â that responsibility and weight again#oh great no itâs not gonna be one of them both Aelin and Dorian will want to self sacrifice and fight over who gets to#thank the Wyrd for Manon and Rowan to stop them and be protection squad so no more Romeo Julietâs#I CARE â it doesnât make you weak â he knew sheâd care â the full circle#I care if we lose this war I care if I fail2rally the Crochans I care if u go in2Morath&do not return as something worth living.#itâs giving Zoyalai; my beautiful ruthless Zoya Id hand hand you the final blow myself quote vibes#Now do you wish to tell me that caring is not such a bad thing? Well this is what comes of it.#Witchling â princeling â the literal cold shoulder
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SPERG YOUR HEART OUT
#EVERYONE#NOW !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#& FOREVER#i love it when my friends &/or mutuals post about their interest & Passions i will like your posts but really i Loved them.#i deleted some tags because they might be interpreted as weird(er than usual) but 0_0 i am âŻPassionate about âŻPassion (for fashion - Bratz)#still kind of feel like a worthless human being but i secured another hangout in like a week so yayyy ^_^#I GET TO BOTHER SOMEONE TOO NOW i just wish people did that to me too why am i like always the one raving#literally have to beg my friend to give me updates on her things even if i normally hate it even i go out of my way to look for things#for us to discuss -_- GIRL please i am for real not just faking for politeness who do you think i am I WANT TO KNOW#so effin excited OMG i have like so much to say & the greatest thing is that this girl has no knowledge at all about my Thing#so i can explain from the very beginning You literally have no idea how much i practiced the conversation in my head#ever since she told me & she said she wanted me to go on & talk about it more i have been Devising My Plan#OMG YAYYYY ^_^_^_^_^_^ AIMU SO HEPI AAARRRGHHHHHGSJDJSHSJDHSHSG#& OFC i had to plug it in the first time i met her in person i just could not help myself there was an NF on that day & i told her i wanted#to catch it i had to go in the end for a different reason & BTW it was such a whiplash the show itself was so fun but the winner... 0_0 NO.#next i will ask her about berserk & maybe even read it so we can talk about it because she really likes it#i dropped it when i was 14 because the laptop i was using to read it was complete crap Just like mine is RN#like a section of my keyboard is completely dead T_T so i have to use the on-screen one...
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Mel for the unhinged character bingo!
yessss YEEEESSSSSSSSS
#ask me#so Mel is in the unenviable position of being a very strong character whose rights I support and whose wrongs I also fully support#BUT the way she's treated broadly in the fandom is so pervasive and so consistent and so frustrating to me that#I am in full -must protect my blorbo- mode with her at all times#-Mel's story is over so the only thing left for her to do is die-#-if Mel dies then J can get together with V and they will appreciate her for her sacrifice bc she died a hero who rejected Ambessa-#enough! enough I say!#what about proving to ambessa that she can take the throne for herself? what about the angst of defying her mother and her home country#and opposing those in Piltover who DO want war and want to raze the undercity#what about the magic that she's heavily foreshadowed to have and how it's different from hextech#and how it directly opposes but also parallels what is happening to Viktor#what about her -friends- abroad and the plot Mel was cooking through all of season 1 that has not been revealed yet#there's so much potential for her to have to confront the fact that J was slowly becoming a monster through season 1#and that she can't ignore the undercity forever#also what if whoever Ambessa says killed her brother comes after Mel too!#it is very frustrating to see Mel get dismissed as dead or evil or irredeemable or whatever when she is consistently#the most interesting person in the room in every single scene she's in and the character who shows the most conviction and change#so yeah i will take a bullet for her she is my blorbo I will despise any character who hurts her#and I would cradle her in my arms if she gave me a chance - which she would never! - but a girl can dream#however I also enjoy leaning into the idea that Mel is perceived as being a devil from the outside - Mel leans into it too when it serves#but it's in direct opposition to her ironclad values and the personality that she keeps hidden a layer down#I genuinely think that Mel will have a happy ending - or at least as happy an ending that an Arcane character can get lol#like I fully believe she will take the throne (Piltover) in the end but I can only guess at this point what that will cost her#I love putting Mel in situations but mainly to play with both how creative she can get and also how fucking far she will go to win#which is ANOTHER thing we know is probably true about Mel but has not been put on display yet#also Mel has already done a great job at separating what she wants for herself as a person from just being Ambessa's daughter#but Mel still deserves to get plenty of great therapy for that situation because OH GOD THAT CHILDHOOD FLASHBACK#also Kino is dead? maybe dead?? at least Mel fully believes he's dead so she needs therapy and hugs for that too#I am super normal about her can you tell
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Idk if I'm gonna be able to articulate this on the fly like first thing in the morning, but. I think my ENTIRE body of work is This: Examining how family ties, bonds or lack thereof, the good and bad AND ugly, seep into every facet of who we are and how we come to interact with others. How sometimes, a family tie (or again, a Lack of one), will sometimes bleed into how you act and treat specific people. Will bleed into how you CONNECT with those people (or, will be the very reason you fail to do so).
HOWEVER. HOWEVER. THERE IS A DELICATE LINE. A BALANCING ACT. You CANNOT just simply attribute fanon flavored ideas of found family to such characters. That's too simple, and sometimes, is a complete disservice to the specific character you're working with. I am once again bringing up Chilchuck. YES, him being a dad Absolutely seeps into how he treats his party. But if you call him the party's dad, you're Insane. Do you know ANYTHING ABOUT THAT MAN???? He would prefer you didn't. But I digress. He strikes a fascinating balance, between having The Qualities and ESPECIALLY expressing his care for his party in a Really Specific divorced (separated.) father of three fashion, but that does Not make him a "dad friend". He's a professional. He's on business. He's going home at the end of the day, and at the end of this adventure he's thinking of setting up a shop. I wanted to keep this more vague and broad but like. The Chilchuck example REALLY DOES perfectly articulate What I'm trying to get at, here. He's the perfect encapsulation of How his family shapes him, how that bleeds into his relationships with others, vs Who he is as a person.
How we were raised, our family ties, whether you adhere to it or you've fallen FAR from the tree -- you still fell from that stupid fucking tree. It's in your blood. Literally. It gave you shape, whether you liked it or not. And sometimes some things just set off weird domino effects, that also affect us irrevocably forever.
WHICH IS. TO SAY. I have no fucking idea what I'm talking about. I'm always trying to figure that out. Found family is/can be real, you're not strictly bound by blood if you don't wanna be. BUT. The bullshit I'm constantly on, is trying to figure out how to balance all that without slotting everyone into reductive roles. I'm gay and I seek to destroy the nuclear family. Not attempt to recreate nuclear family 2.0. You CAN reconstruct What Family Is/Means from the ground up, but you have to accept that things are going to get Weird. Because you're Queer. You are fundamentally incompatible with the status quo and normalcy, the solution is NOT assimilation and palatability, the solution is to just. Get weirder. And be fluent in canon. Okay. I love you
#my notes#why am i becoming chilchuck's spokesperson. chilchuck defender.#well i can fucking tell you! it's because my dad is a divorced father of FIVE. with a drinking problem so bad#that if he didn't quit it would have killed him. and guess what! i can tell you a few things about alfonse.#the way alfonse strives to be just like gustav. idealizing him ect ect. and the way i just wanna grab him by the shoulders#and SHAKE HIM. SHAKE HIM. SHAKE HIM. snap him out of repeating the cycles by the power of friendship and gay sex#it SUCKS ASS TO SAY IT IN THE SAME BREATH. I HATE THIS AS MUCH AS YOU DO.#but if you (my own brother) are gonna end up Just Like Your Father could you at least go all the way. get divorced. for the love of god#get divorced. oh my god okay oversharing hour but the WAY. THE WAY. dad once told me#[my brother's now ex wife far as i know thank god it finally happened bu my god it took WAY too long]#but the way my dad told me once [my brother's ex wife] reminded him a bit of his second wife.#oh my god i didn't even tell you the famous dad lore. he's been divorced three times. he is THE EPIC DIVORCE MAN.#like when i look at chilchuck i go. i know this man personally. i live with him.#alfonse's case is. really. really way more complicated. like what i just said#truly is only the tip of the iceberg WHILE ALSO. SIMULTANEOUSLY. only being One Single Facet. to what he is to me.#BUT ALSO. CONSIDER. the Parallels i'm setting up between alfonse w gustav VS. moe and its mother.#okay i will not say more bc i'll talk forever. final piece i really want to throw out there is though#do you think anna's situation w her family business being The Basis of how she connects w others#do you think the WAY she and all the other annas were Raised is like. comparable to religion actually?#and ESP like. i don't know if there's any hard and fast rules or anything but she and all her sisters ARE.#PRESUMABLY. RAISED A V SPECIFIC WAY. to be highly competitive cut-throat merchants.#what does this mean for COMMANDER anna. one of (if not ONLY?) instance of an anna who fell outside of that.#also is it agab dependant? could you be amab and then later on become an anna if that's what#oh my god i'm thinking of that ratatouille post. accepting of your gender identity but NOT of your Life Choice to be a chef.#is it. exactly like that. and if you're afab and end up being trans do you just fall to the wayside?#like the point is NOT to inject transphobia in here. the point is to ask Okay HOW THE HELL DOES ANY OF THIS WORK???????#bc the Implications go INSANE. and also the point is to ask what is the funniest answer possible to any of the questions#I'M HERE TO HAVE FUN. AND BE INSANE.#like final clarification i only say religion bc that's what i'm familiar with (specifically christainity)#but maybe it's more apt -- a different flavor of traditional family culture that has strict gender roles.
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