#ashlea i hate you

[dejatiny]

Hello my name is Ashlea. I'm 27 years old. I was born and raised in Texas. I have three dogs that I love. Music, drawing and hockey are life.

I am a real person who has feelings; I am not just a username or blog post.

Remember that before you send anon hate to me or anyone else.

Be Well. Be Kind.

tag 5 people to spread the message and add the tag #fandom has feelings.

Tagging: @savedbybishop, @likeshootingstarsinthenightsky, @gabriellebelongsingryffindor, @h-ockey, @youre-a-starling

[usramblings]

Don’t lose sight of who you are. Change is good and important, but be aware as well. Whenever, I’ve thought of being in a relationship with someone I’ve always wanted to HOLD MY OWN. I never want to be the girl that gets played. I never want to be the girl who is too into their feelings. I never want to be the clingy girlfriend. I don’t want my significant other to think I can’t live without them. I don’t want anyone to think I need them.

I want to be with someone, because I like being with them, not because I feel like I need to be with them. I hate feeling needy.

Although, I consider myself an open person, I do admit a lot of the time I’m open about the things I want to be open about. It took me awhile, to start to be vulnerable. And sometimes, I hate it. I don’t like the thought of my feelings being so readily changed by someone else’s actions. The processes of falling in love… it’s beautiful. The feeling of being accepted by someone just because they love you, regardless of your many many flaws. It’s beautiful. But, the anxiety of whether or not there will be a threshold for that acceptance. The anxiety of how unexpected life can be. How feelings can change so quick, leaving you weak to being heartbroken. The chance that someone can give you all that and feel that, and take it away just like that too. It scares me. I’m scared of false words. Sometimes, I don’t know whats real and I don’t want to keep looking for validation of its authenticity, but I cant stop questioning things sometimes.

For a relationship to grow, you have to want it to grow, you have to nourish it. At the same time, I’m stuck between balancing the want for the relationship to grow and shielding myself in case something happens. 

I need to remember my self-worth and I need to remember that it is by my definition. Regardless of how much I might care for someone or their opinion (because it’s a no brainer that we care about our loved ones opinions) my opinion of myself is what matters most. Don’t be insecure. Don’t look for validation in others. Look for validation in yourself. You need to keep drilling this in your mind Ashlea.

[musicandfandoms101]

Dear Younger Me,

When you turn eight years old, you’re going to meet your best friend Lily. She’s a bit of a tomboy but that’s okay. She’s very nice and accepting of anything and everything. Your parents like her, her family likes you. 

At ten, you move away from her and lose contact. At ten, you meet your next best friends, Mercedes and Logan. A few months after you become best friends, Mercedes comes out as bisexual. Sh, it’s a secret. What’s bisexual? I might be that. Sh, you’re not. Halfway through the year, Mercedes tells you she's self-harming. It's revealed to her parents. It's hard, you learn about self-harm and depression. At ten, you get your first and only girlfriend. Mercedes and you are so happy but hush-hush, it's a secret. Don't let your parents know. 

At eleven, your sister finds out about Mercedes being bisexual and tells your parents. They ban all relationship with her unless it’s at your house. It breaks your heart. You kiss her twice in your relationship, both in your actual closet.You end the relationship because you’re scared of your feelings. 

At twelve, you move away again. You meet your next best friend, Lauryn. She’s beautiful, but you’re not gay. She’s just your best friend. This whole friendship is based on a lie. You’ve never seen her favourite show Ninjago, but you’re new and Cameron has seen it so you know a little about it. When she asked, you panicked, and said yes. You call her your Wifey. Slowly but surely, you fell for her. But you don’t know it yet. You won’t realize it for years. You begin to date a boy named Skyler who loves you like crazy. Love him truly. You also meet Kimi during this time. She’s funny, quirky, self-harm. She’s broken but in a beautiful way. Lauryn comes out as bisexual, and you’re so happy. Why?

At thirteen, Lauryn gives you two photos of herself. You hang them on your mirror. You say she’s just your best friend. You’re so damn confused about yourself. You’re so damn depressed. You break up with Skyler. April 29, 2016, you try to kill yourself. Your friend talks to you all night to keep you from killing yourself. You meet Ashlea and Nadia. God, Nadia is beautiful. She’s funny, and she likes your music. You think she’s awesome. She becomes one of your best friends. At the end of the year, Nadia moves away. Lauryn confesses she used to have a crush on you. And you don’t know why the “used to” in that sentence hurts. 

At fourteen, you discover your gender. After many confused years, you discover you’re Agender. After you come out to your best friends, one of them sexually assaults you. And every bit of happiness you felt, is crumbled. You consider killing yourself again. You hate yourself. Nobody tells Lauryn what happened. She thinks you abandoned her. Again, your heart is broken and you don’t know why. This year, you become best friends with Lauryn's boyfriend. You don’t like him, but you begin to image a threeway relationship between the three of you, and you don’t know why. You push these thoughts away. You’re not gay, or bisexual. There are days where you’re crazy about your boyfriend, and there are days when you can’t help but stare at her in complete awe. She’s just your best friend, and you love her like a sister, right? Yeah. That’s it. You reconnect with Lily, and she comes out to you as transgender. Lily is Ethan. It makes so much sense. You also reconnect with Mercedes. You consider getting top surgery. 

At fifteen, you discover, after five years, your sexuality. Abroromantic-bisexual (demisexual with girls, regular with boys.) The first thing you do is cry and text Lauryn. “I did it. I discovered my sexuality.” During this time, you realise something. You’re in love with her. You’re dating a boy named Kian, but he breaks up with you. You confess to Alex and Lauryn by accident how you feel about Lauryn when talking about how many girls you’ve actually liked. Four. Lauryn playfully asks why you didn’t tell her, and your heart breaks when you know she doesn’t feel the same. Your heart ends up in a puddle on the floor. You cry allot. You also fall for a boy named Julius. You realise at this time you’re polyamorous, but you don’t tell anyone but Lauryn. You’re still going to stay in a monogamous relationship with Julius. You realise that you don’t want to disappoint anyone, so you're going to stay in your body like it is. 

This is the end of the line for right now. I’ll update every year. You’re not happy yet, but you’re better than you were.

[in-her-wildest-dreams]

THIS HUMIDITY SUCKS SO BAD I HATE SUMMER BUT I LOVE THIS AND YOU ARE THE CUTEST EVER MISS ASHLEA

any of my fellow aussies get as affected by the humidity as my hair today?? 😂

[simonslittlepuff]

THANK YOU FOR 600 FOLLOWERS. HERE’S SOME FACTS.

since I said I’d write something for my 500 followers and I never did (sorrysorrysorrySORRY), I’ve decided to tell everyone a bit about myself since I’ve gained so many new followers recently! Thank you for 600!!!!

So hey dudes, I’m Ashlea (or ash to most people). My name is said as you’d say Ashley. I feel I should clarify as when I used to do drama I was called ash-lee-a every goddamn lesson. Yes it’s been like 8 years. And I am still bitter.

I turned 16 on the 6th of December and now I can legally get my learners (for driving a car) and I can get my license to fly a plane. I’m not doing either, for the record. I don’t trust myself with my life or anyone else’s in metal death traps.

I’m from Melbourne, Australia, meaning that I’m on holidays until the end of January, then back to hell. I’m not looking forward to it. Although I dont hate school, it’s really not my favourite thing lol.

I have a little brother who is 12 and going into high school this year and I’m scared for him. I was so stressed out that I went for a leadership role just to spy on him. I got that role by the way. its not that he’s not a good kid, I just have really bad anxiety and i just want him to be happy and settled in.

TW// MENTAL ILLNESS: Speaking of anxiety, I have social and general anxiety which is SO FUN. I’m also depressed and I’m hopeful going on meds in like march. Yikes. I know. is anyone ever truely happy tho? #deep

ANYWAY BACK TO HAPPY I love theatre and music, and have since I was like 9 or 10. Just blame glee and the show tunes they played. I saw wicked when I was 7 (holy fuck that’s ages ago) with my mum and my aunty at the regent theatre and from then wicked has been one of my favourite musicals. Then when I was 11 I saw Annie and knew from then wanted to be on that stage one day. Last year I saw wicked again at a local theatre with my friend who’s favourite musical is wicked. It was his first time seeing it and I’ve never seen him so happy. My favourite musicals include Wicked, Hamilton, In The Heights and The Book Of Mormon.

Not to crush my dreams from the last 7 years, but I can’t sing, so broadway will never be for me. It was an actual heartbreaking moment for me when I realised that a few years ago lmao. So broadway is out of the picture. I guess I could still act because I’ve wanted to do that for as long as I could remember, but even then it’s very rare to get an acting role. So that leaves writing. I decided after reading Fangirl for the first time that I was going to use the talent I was told I had, and be a writer when I grew up. So far I procrastinate writing everything so it’s not going too well. oh well.

I used to be emo for like 3 years but I’m not now and thats the main thing. I dont know what music I really listen to now other than soundtracks wow. 

i love anime. So much. I am weeb as fuck. Save me. I love Yuri on ice and free way too much. I also love Sherlock and that’s emotionally destroying me atm. i want to die the more i think about how season 4 will end.

That’s all. Feel free to message me whenever oh my gosh I would love some new pals !!! I genuinely hope everyone is having a good day, and if you’re not you can vent to me all you want on anon and I’ll be there for you. Love you and thank you for 600 followers. Never in my wildest dreams did I think i’d gain 600 new friends so fast. Thanks for coming on this snowbazzy journey with me.

- ash xxxxxxxxx

[kidsviral-blog]

‘Food writer’ attacks Dana Loesch, ends up with egg on his face

New Post has been published on https://kidsviral.info/food-writer-attacks-dana-loesch-ends-up-with-egg-on-his-face/

‘Food writer’ attacks Dana Loesch, ends up with egg on his face

http://twitter.com/#!/DLoesch/status/529001161961897985

Conservative authors and speakers always need to have security at public appearances because the left is so intolerant of opinions they disagree with. Dana Loesch was scheduled to do a book signing at the Texas Christian University bookstore today but she cancelled after being informed at the last minute that security was not being provided.

Will reschedule #HandsOffMyGun signing for another venue very soon. Apologies. Very uncomfortable to have everyone defenseless.

— Dana Loesch (@DLoesch) November 2, 2014

Because TCU is a gun free zone and we just now found out we can't have security, today's signing at 2pm will not take place. #HandsOffMyGun

— Dana Loesch (@DLoesch) November 2, 2014

At signing in Grapevine had incident where man tried to push through line, yelled at employees, and punched store signs. #HandsOffMyGun

— Dana Loesch (@DLoesch) November 2, 2014

He was a peach "@DLoesch: At signing in Grapevine … man tried to push through line, yelled at employees, and punched store signs."

— Czarina Ash Phoenix (@AshPnX) November 2, 2014

I was there when that man became destructive because @DLoesch was there. Her kids were there, and thankfully so was security.

— Brandon Morse (@TheBrandonMorse) November 2, 2014

Nothing the “tolerant” left hates more is a conservative appearing in public defending our Constitutional rights.

Because I can't afford to pay other men to carry my gun while pretending to be antigun like #MomsDemand, radio or biz usually provides.

— Dana Loesch (@DLoesch) November 2, 2014

Enter Star-Telegram “reporter” Bud Kennedy inventing false stories.

Bud Kennedy’s hair styled by General Electric.

Supposed book signing by @DLoesch looks more like a staged event to promote campus carry. Waited until last minute pic.twitter.com/5QOjYi2RJS

— Bud Kennedy (@BudKennedy) November 2, 2014

Whatta lie, @BudKennedy . Do you bother to fact check before spouting off? Didn’t realize that you worked there.

— Dana Loesch (@DLoesch) November 2, 2014

Author @DLoesch cancels at @TCUBookstore because she can't pack heat there.TCU has property rights, religious freedom http://t.co/T5tNsCHRl6

— Bud Kennedy (@BudKennedy) November 2, 2014

@BudKennedy And?

— Dana Loesch (@DLoesch) November 2, 2014

@DLoesch Why would you expect to carry a gun on someone else's property without permission?

— Bud Kennedy (@BudKennedy) November 2, 2014

Please cite where that was expected, @BudKennedy . Did you call the bookstore?

— Dana Loesch (@DLoesch) November 2, 2014

@DLoesch Just seems odd at last minute.

— Bud Kennedy (@BudKennedy) November 2, 2014

Security is routinely provided at events. Not here. Just informed. Check facts, then report, op/ed writer @BudKennedy .

— Dana Loesch (@DLoesch) November 2, 2014

@DLoesch You are obviously using this as s shameless publicity stunt.

— Bud Kennedy (@BudKennedy) November 2, 2014

…says the guy no one has ever heard of while attacking a nationally known author, speaker, television and radio host. Who is really looking for publicity?

Prove it, @BudKennedy . By the way, according to the bookstore, you haven’t called them. Stay local, man.

— Dana Loesch (@DLoesch) November 2, 2014

@DLoesch You are unfairly making TCU a punching bag in a cheap stunt to promote your book.

— Bud Kennedy (@BudKennedy) November 2, 2014

I said nothing negative about TCU, but nice try. @BudKennedy

— Dana Loesch (@DLoesch) November 2, 2014

@DLoesch @BudKennedy looks more like some nobody is using you to try to make his reputation. He failed.

— BenghaziTangoFoxtrot (@TFinn82) November 2, 2014

Sounds like you were really looking forward to seeing me there defenseless, @BudKennedy . Just going on your Tweets. #creepy

— Dana Loesch (@DLoesch) November 2, 2014

@DLoesch @LegeLand You are the one unfairly making a punching bag out of a private university with property rights and religious freedom.

— Bud Kennedy (@BudKennedy) November 2, 2014

About that, where did I attack TCU @BudKennedy ? Please link. You’re desperate for infighting here, why? #localfoodwriter

— Dana Loesch (@DLoesch) November 2, 2014

The display for a @DLoesch book signing has been dismantled. She wanted armed security at @TCUBookstore. Few buyers pic.twitter.com/6oICZ9PFan

— Bud Kennedy (@BudKennedy) November 2, 2014

“Few buyers.” Dana’s book is a #1 seller in two categories at Amazon.

Ah, @BudKennedy so you were stalking me. Got it.

— Dana Loesch (@DLoesch) November 2, 2014

@DLoesch wow what did he have planned that he's throwing this much of a fit bc u cancelled? He's clearly not a supporter @BudKennedy

— Amberlamps (@ArthurNonymous) November 2, 2014

@ArthurNonymous it's as if @BudKennedy had something "planned" for today and is pissed off this didn't go as he wanted…#HandsOffMyGun

— Jeff Allen (@Cozmacozmy) November 2, 2014

@DLoesch @BudKennedy is he upset he couldn't harass you in person? Creeper.

— Jordan (@jortron) November 2, 2014

@DLoesch Dozens of book signings here, including Perry and Sen. Davis. Nobody else ever demanded armed guards.

— Bud Kennedy (@BudKennedy) November 2, 2014

False and irrelevant @BudKennedy .

— Dana Loesch (@DLoesch) November 2, 2014

@DLoesch @BudKennedy Gov. Perry went out without security? Buddy, you're starting to sound delusional.

— Ashlea Flaherty (@ashleaflaherty) November 2, 2014

@DLoesch @BudKennedy Work in publishing. We always have armed security for our high-profile authors. Keeping them safe is big concern.

— Todd Starowitz (@ToddStarowitz) November 2, 2014

Maybe @BudKennedy should learn Texas Security Laws!!!! There's a big difference. @DLoesch

— Lawrence B.Jones III (@LawrenceBJones3) November 2, 2014

@DLoesch It's funny that someone belligerently harassing you keeps insisting you don't require security.

— David (@TheSalesmanLV) November 2, 2014

@pretty_fits Bud is a local joke, posing as a 'journalist' who's claim to fame is as a food critic with a mean attitude @DLoesch

— #StandWithIsrael (@thejenn999) November 2, 2014

@DLoesch Ma'am… This asshole —-> @BudKennedy <—- does NOT represent Ft. Worth. We are with you.

— War Child (@SlickeryTrigger) November 2, 2014

I believe @BudKennedy owes me an apology and retraction for his shameful online behavior and ad hominem attacks. @startelegram

— Dana Loesch (@DLoesch) November 2, 2014

I plan on digging in and helping fight to restore Texas’s 2A liberty. Vermont has better gun laws than we do here.

— Dana Loesch (@DLoesch) November 2, 2014

Bud doesn’t know what he’s in for.

***

Related

Dana Loesch reports unhinged hater hoping her ‘kid gets blown up by some Republican loony’

Dana Loesch’s ‘Rambo’ Twitter avatar upsets Piers Morgan’s tender sensibilities

Dana Loesch’s book released; Piers Morgan, Shannon Watts hardest hit [pics]

Full Twitchy coverage of Dana Loesch

Read more: http://twitchy.com/2014/11/02/food-writer-attacks-dana-loesch-ends-up-with-egg-on-his-face/

[obrackles-blog]

are people from new zealand hot because of their sexy accents

or do they get the sexy accents because they're hot?

[kidsviral-blog]

‘Food writer’ attacks Dana Loesch, ends up with egg on his face

New Post has been published on https://kidsviral.info/food-writer-attacks-dana-loesch-ends-up-with-egg-on-his-face/

‘Food writer’ attacks Dana Loesch, ends up with egg on his face

http://twitter.com/#!/DLoesch/status/529001161961897985

Conservative authors and speakers always need to have security at public appearances because the left is so intolerant of opinions they disagree with. Dana Loesch was scheduled to do a book signing at the Texas Christian University bookstore today but she cancelled after being informed at the last minute that security was not being provided.

Will reschedule #HandsOffMyGun signing for another venue very soon. Apologies. Very uncomfortable to have everyone defenseless.

— Dana Loesch (@DLoesch) November 2, 2014

Because TCU is a gun free zone and we just now found out we can't have security, today's signing at 2pm will not take place. #HandsOffMyGun

— Dana Loesch (@DLoesch) November 2, 2014

At signing in Grapevine had incident where man tried to push through line, yelled at employees, and punched store signs. #HandsOffMyGun

— Dana Loesch (@DLoesch) November 2, 2014

He was a peach "@DLoesch: At signing in Grapevine … man tried to push through line, yelled at employees, and punched store signs."

— Czarina Ash Phoenix (@AshPnX) November 2, 2014

I was there when that man became destructive because @DLoesch was there. Her kids were there, and thankfully so was security.

— Brandon Morse (@TheBrandonMorse) November 2, 2014

Nothing the “tolerant” left hates more is a conservative appearing in public defending our Constitutional rights.

Because I can't afford to pay other men to carry my gun while pretending to be antigun like #MomsDemand, radio or biz usually provides.

— Dana Loesch (@DLoesch) November 2, 2014

Enter Star-Telegram “reporter” Bud Kennedy inventing false stories.

Bud Kennedy’s hair styled by General Electric.

Supposed book signing by @DLoesch looks more like a staged event to promote campus carry. Waited until last minute pic.twitter.com/5QOjYi2RJS

— Bud Kennedy (@BudKennedy) November 2, 2014

Whatta lie, @BudKennedy . Do you bother to fact check before spouting off? Didn’t realize that you worked there.

— Dana Loesch (@DLoesch) November 2, 2014

Author @DLoesch cancels at @TCUBookstore because she can't pack heat there.TCU has property rights, religious freedom http://t.co/T5tNsCHRl6

— Bud Kennedy (@BudKennedy) November 2, 2014

@BudKennedy And?

— Dana Loesch (@DLoesch) November 2, 2014

@DLoesch Why would you expect to carry a gun on someone else's property without permission?

— Bud Kennedy (@BudKennedy) November 2, 2014

Please cite where that was expected, @BudKennedy . Did you call the bookstore?

— Dana Loesch (@DLoesch) November 2, 2014

@DLoesch Just seems odd at last minute.

— Bud Kennedy (@BudKennedy) November 2, 2014

Security is routinely provided at events. Not here. Just informed. Check facts, then report, op/ed writer @BudKennedy .

— Dana Loesch (@DLoesch) November 2, 2014

@DLoesch You are obviously using this as s shameless publicity stunt.

— Bud Kennedy (@BudKennedy) November 2, 2014

…says the guy no one has ever heard of while attacking a nationally known author, speaker, television and radio host. Who is really looking for publicity?

Prove it, @BudKennedy . By the way, according to the bookstore, you haven’t called them. Stay local, man.

— Dana Loesch (@DLoesch) November 2, 2014

@DLoesch You are unfairly making TCU a punching bag in a cheap stunt to promote your book.

— Bud Kennedy (@BudKennedy) November 2, 2014

I said nothing negative about TCU, but nice try. @BudKennedy

— Dana Loesch (@DLoesch) November 2, 2014

@DLoesch @BudKennedy looks more like some nobody is using you to try to make his reputation. He failed.

— BenghaziTangoFoxtrot (@TFinn82) November 2, 2014

Sounds like you were really looking forward to seeing me there defenseless, @BudKennedy . Just going on your Tweets. #creepy

— Dana Loesch (@DLoesch) November 2, 2014

@DLoesch @LegeLand You are the one unfairly making a punching bag out of a private university with property rights and religious freedom.

— Bud Kennedy (@BudKennedy) November 2, 2014

About that, where did I attack TCU @BudKennedy ? Please link. You’re desperate for infighting here, why? #localfoodwriter

— Dana Loesch (@DLoesch) November 2, 2014

The display for a @DLoesch book signing has been dismantled. She wanted armed security at @TCUBookstore. Few buyers pic.twitter.com/6oICZ9PFan

— Bud Kennedy (@BudKennedy) November 2, 2014

“Few buyers.” Dana’s book is a #1 seller in two categories at Amazon.

Ah, @BudKennedy so you were stalking me. Got it.

— Dana Loesch (@DLoesch) November 2, 2014

@DLoesch wow what did he have planned that he's throwing this much of a fit bc u cancelled? He's clearly not a supporter @BudKennedy

— Amberlamps (@ArthurNonymous) November 2, 2014

@ArthurNonymous it's as if @BudKennedy had something "planned" for today and is pissed off this didn't go as he wanted…#HandsOffMyGun

— Jeff Allen (@Cozmacozmy) November 2, 2014

@DLoesch @BudKennedy is he upset he couldn't harass you in person? Creeper.

— Jordan (@jortron) November 2, 2014

@DLoesch Dozens of book signings here, including Perry and Sen. Davis. Nobody else ever demanded armed guards.

— Bud Kennedy (@BudKennedy) November 2, 2014

False and irrelevant @BudKennedy .

— Dana Loesch (@DLoesch) November 2, 2014

@DLoesch @BudKennedy Gov. Perry went out without security? Buddy, you're starting to sound delusional.

— Ashlea Flaherty (@ashleaflaherty) November 2, 2014

@DLoesch @BudKennedy Work in publishing. We always have armed security for our high-profile authors. Keeping them safe is big concern.

— Todd Starowitz (@ToddStarowitz) November 2, 2014

Maybe @BudKennedy should learn Texas Security Laws!!!! There's a big difference. @DLoesch

— Lawrence B.Jones III (@LawrenceBJones3) November 2, 2014

@DLoesch It's funny that someone belligerently harassing you keeps insisting you don't require security.

— David (@TheSalesmanLV) November 2, 2014

@pretty_fits Bud is a local joke, posing as a 'journalist' who's claim to fame is as a food critic with a mean attitude @DLoesch

— #StandWithIsrael (@thejenn999) November 2, 2014

@DLoesch Ma'am… This asshole —-> @BudKennedy <—- does NOT represent Ft. Worth. We are with you.

— War Child (@SlickeryTrigger) November 2, 2014

I believe @BudKennedy owes me an apology and retraction for his shameful online behavior and ad hominem attacks. @startelegram

— Dana Loesch (@DLoesch) November 2, 2014

I plan on digging in and helping fight to restore Texas’s 2A liberty. Vermont has better gun laws than we do here.

— Dana Loesch (@DLoesch) November 2, 2014

Bud doesn’t know what he’s in for.

***

Related

Dana Loesch reports unhinged hater hoping her ‘kid gets blown up by some Republican loony’

Dana Loesch’s ‘Rambo’ Twitter avatar upsets Piers Morgan’s tender sensibilities

Dana Loesch’s book released; Piers Morgan, Shannon Watts hardest hit [pics]

Full Twitchy coverage of Dana Loesch

Read more: http://twitchy.com/2014/11/02/food-writer-attacks-dana-loesch-ends-up-with-egg-on-his-face/