#ashes of memory episode 2

[t0bey]

pretty much the entire racecourse holdup scene in AOM episode 2

[deadtired-highkeyenergetic]

In Every Universe

Well. S2EP7 huh. What a ride. Went back to rewatch parts of it while researching for this fic and man, does it still hit as hard as ever. I suppose the sad Arcane playlist didn't help either.

Right, here it is, the longest piece I've ever written in all my years of fanfiction writing. I'm so glad Arcane existed, for all its flaws I still love the series with my whole heart and especially a certain one-eyed war criminal underground drug lord.

Playlist I listened to while writing this:

Spoilers for Arcane Season 2 Episode 7 ahead

One moment you're face to face with the arcane itself, and the next you're staring at a wooden ceiling that's somehow familiar and unfamiliar at the same time. There's something warm next to you and your confused mind registers the weight of something on your chest.

Your first instinct is to quickly free yourself, to put some distance between you and the possibly harmful object, so you lash out at it, rolling off the bed. A rather familiar sounding yelp of pain comes from your left, but your disoriented mind can't remember why it sounds so familiar.

"Easy there, love," a voice groans. Your breath catches in your throat when the figure the voice belongs to sleepily sits up, rubbing his eye.

Silco?

You shake your head. This can't be, he's dead, you've seen his body, you know for certain he's dead, but then why are you seeing this? An illusion? A trick of the mind? Hallucinations?

Your mind races through the possibilities, each more absurd than the last. 'Silco' slides off the bed, carefully approaching you as he should and you properly take in his appearance. Gone is his orange and black eye, instead white surrounds a pale yellow iris. His features are softer, sea-foam coloured eye filled with a level of concern and worry you've only seen him show before he became The Eye of Zaun.

"Love?" His voice snaps you out of your thoughts.

You narrow your eyes at him, muscles tensing. "If this is an illusion, it's a terrible one considering you can't even replicate Silco properly."

"What are you talking about, love? The last I checked, I wasn't an illusion," 'Silco' tilts his head in confusion and raises his hands in surrender. "I mean you no harm, love."

Your hands clench into fists. His words may not contain any lies you can detect but you know better than to let down your guard in unfamiliar territory. You shift your foot and lunge at him, tackling 'Silco' to the ground with a snarl. His eye widens but just like the Silco you know, he quickly regains his signature calm and throws you off.

"I don't want to hurt you, love, but you're not giving me much of a choice with that attitude of yours." 'Silco' huffs. His palms remain open but you can see his muscles tense slightly. You continue your barrage of attacks, and he counters them all with practiced ease, as though he's seen those moves a thousand times before.

The both of you dance until you gain the upper hand by pulling out a move that catches him off guard and pin him to the ground. Your hand slips to where you know he hides a dagger but your fingers find nothing, to your surprise. Taking advantage of that moment, 'Silco' rolls out from under you, panting.

"Now now, love. I know we're married but still, warn me before you start feeling me up." He flashes you a cheeky grin, something he hasn't done in a long time and leaves you even more confused. Something isn't adding up, he's both the Silco you know and isn't. He knows your fighting moves, knows how to counter them which proves that he is the Silco you know and he smells like the Silco you know — cigar ash and scotch. However his left eye is different and he doesn't carry Vander's dagger on him at all times. Wait did he say the two of you are married?

"Married?" You echo.

"Don't tell me you lost your memory," he frowns. "You're acting weird today, love, what has gotten into you?"

"You're the weird one!" You spit back. There's no sensible explanation for any of this…unless…

"Everything alright in there? I know I told you two to turn things down especially at night, some of us need to sleep." Yet another familiar voice sounds from outside the door.

Vander?

"Everything's fine, and don't worry you'll be getting the sleep you need every night," 'Silco' drawls before turning back to you. You stare wide-eyed at the door, throat tightening as emotions threaten to overwhelm you. Flashes of your past with the two brothers race through your mind, Vander's easy smile and comforting presence, Silco's sharp wit and seeming indifference towards you and Vander, your laughter and love for them both. A tear slides down your cheek and you bolt from the room, racing down the stairs you know so well and out the bar, only to be met with a city you don't recognise.

Zaun is lit up, the sun shining down on both cities as Zaunites and Piltovians alike walk past you, chatting away. The streets bustle as hawkers call out their wares and golden light shines upon the Bridge of Progress which is further littered with shops instead of blockades and enforcers. Everywhere you look, buildings stand tall and proud, colour decorates the dirty grey city you knew and your heart shatters.

This…is this what could have been?

Your vision blurs from the tears pouring down your face as it hits you. This is an alternate reality, there's no other explanation. A reality where Zaun becomes independent, co-existing as equals with Piltover. A reality where Silco and Vander's dream comes true.

You stand in the middle of the street with tear streaks on your cheeks, eyes puffy and feel so lost until someone drapes something over your shoulders. It's warm, whatever it is, and smells nice.

"I'm right here." Arms gently guide you to rest your head on a familiar shoulder. "Take all the time you need."

You're not sure why but that's all it takes for the dam to break and you find yourself sobbing hard into his shoulder. His arms wrap around you, pulling you closer and you feel his lips press against the top of your head. You hug him tightly, mind still screaming that this is all a dream, but if this is really just all a dream, you don't want to wake up.

Once you've calmed down, you lift your head and Silco smiles softly at you. "Shall we go home?"

You hum in agreement, letting him lead you back to The Last Drop. You can feel his hand resting on the small of your back, his shoulder brushing against yours and lean into the touch, grateful for the support. He feels the same as the Silco you know, and if you close your eyes, you're back there again, before the incident at the bridge, before you were forced to choose between Silco and Vander.

When you enter The Last Drop, 'Vander' slides a glass of your favourite drink towards you while 'Silco' takes a seat next to you.

"Nothing for me?" 'Silco' teases. 'Vander' laughs, but slides him a glass of scotch anyways. 'Silco' takes a sip before placing the cup between the two of you, gently resting his hand on your forearm. You cautiously place your own hand on top of his, it fits the same way as your Silco's hand does, but your Silco is dead and this Silco is alive. Then again your Vander is dead and this Vander is alive.

You sniff the drink in front of you, eyeing it warily. 'Silco' snorts, lifting the glass to his lips and takes a mouthful. "See? Not poisoned. What has gotten into you today?"

You frown, tapping your finger on the counter top as you think of a way to broach this topic. How were you going to explain that somehow, you had been transported into your body from an alternate universe? There was also the nagging question of where Ekko, Heimerdinger and Jayce were, if they were even in this universe as well. You heave a sigh, looking into sea foam and grey eyes.

"Just a nightmare." You can't tell them anything, and doubt they'll believe you anyways. 'Silco' narrows his eyes but 'Vander' places a hand on his shoulder, giving it a squeeze. 'Silco' scowls but relents and leaves you alone for the rest of the day, which you spend exploring this alternate reality.

Turns out, this is the reality in which Vi died in the explosion. 'Vander' has different tattoos, but he still betrayed 'Silco' and tried to kill him. How the two made up, well for whatever reason the two seemed adamant about keeping it quiet, but it made your heart ache for what could have been back in your universe.

That night, you can't sleep. Your mind is racing, going through everything you've learnt today. In the dark, you can see 'Silco' peacefully slumbering on his right side, an arm draped over your waist. His chest gently rises and falls with each breath he takes, his face buried into your chest. He looks completely different from your Silco when he sleeps, his dark brown hair tousled, facial muscles relaxed and lips curved into what looks like a smile. Your Silco never slept on his right side, always preferring to sleep on his left side with a dagger clutched under the pillow.

'Silco' mumbles something, stirring slightly and you shift, only for him to blindly grasp for your arm so that he can bury himself further into your chest, bringing a small smile to your face. It's been so long since you've shared your bed with another, maybe you can indulge him just this once. It wouldn't hurt…right?

You run your fingers through his hair, remembering the times where you'd comb his hair for him, gently pressing kisses to his scarred cheek until he told you he had a meeting to attend and then you'd kiss him on the lips for good luck before letting him go. 'Silco' purrs softly, nuzzling into you and holds you closer, a free heater on this cool night.

You miss this. You miss hugging your lover like it's your last moment in this world, you miss his touch, his warmth. You miss the way he holds you tightly when he's feeling down, the feeling of his forehead pressing against yours, the electricity that crackles in the air when his fingers linger on your hand longer than it needs to as he passes you his cigar. You miss the way he makes your heart race from all the small smiles he sends your way during a meeting with the chem-barons, the way he makes you stifle a laugh when he rolls his eye at their bickering, but most of all the way he holds your hand. Your palms have always slotted into each other's like puzzle pieces, made perfectly for one another.

This 'Silco' is the same, yet different, and despite all his faults, you've always loved your Silco. It's why you chose to side with him over Vander, why you walked down the path towards hell with him despite knowing where it led. You knew that given the choice again, you would always choose him over everything else, and if that made you loyal to him to a fault, so be it.

Still, you wonder if you could've steered him towards the path this 'Silco' took. Would you have been able to nudge him towards forgiveness, leaving his hatred and vengeance behind for the shared dream of Zaun? You shake your head, what's past is past, there's no changing it. The only thing you can do now it look forward, and push on ahead, as you know your Silco would want you to, but doing so is so much harder than knowing it.

I love you, the words you were never able to say to him. The both of you always knew how the other felt, but neither of you ever verbalised it. You trace 'Silco's' scars, wondering if this version of you ever uttered those words to him.

"Can't sleep, love?" He mumbles, rolling over so that he can see you.

"It's just…been a long day."

He hums, and then pulls you into a hug, resting his chin on the top of your head. Rubbing gentle circles on your back, he nuzzles your hair. "Then you better get as much rest as you can. I'll be here when you wake up."

Tears begin to fill your eyes again but you squeeze them shut, willing the grief away. If this is a dream, you want it to continue on forever. You don't want to wake up, you don't want to lose Silco and Vander again.

But you still wake up.

Because you have to.

On your second day, you learn that Ekko and Powder are preparing for a competition.

"Ekko?"

"Y/N?"

"Are you —"

"Do you know where we can talk in private?"

You've never been so relieved to hear that.

You learn that Ekko and Heimerdinger have met up, and that Jayce is nowhere to be found. Ekko has a theory that recreating what brought all three of you to this universe in the first place might be able to send you all back home, and he's been trying to do just that the past few days.

"Home," you echo, staring at the bustling city below.

"You…don't want to go back?"

"Do you?" Your question catches him off guard and he pauses, looking at the ground.

"I…I don't know."

"You and Powder, right?" You give him a knowing look and he looks away, embarrassed. "I know the feeling."

He raises an eyebrow but you press on, ignoring the inquisitive look he sends your way. "This world…this universe, it's everything we've wanted. Well, almost everything. Looking at all this, I don't know if I want to go back. Do I want to throw it all away just to go back to bloodshed, chaos and war?"

"We have people back home who need us."

Sevika.

Jinx.

Their faces flash in your mind and your throat constricts.

"We can't just abandon them, as much as we prefer this world." Ekko's eyes are hard. "We have to go back."

It's hurting him to say this, but he's saying it anyways because he knows it's right. You look back at the bright city of Zaun and sigh. Ekko speaks the cold hard truth, but you're torn. Going back means confronting the reality that Vander, and more importantly Silco, are forever lost to you, that Zaun is still struggling in the fight against Piltover, that you have to fight every day to survive, but going back also means reuniting with your closest friend Sevika, your adopted daughter Jinx, and you know they need you as much as you need them.

"I've made my mind up," Ekko turns to leave. "Let me know when you've made yours up. In the meantime, I'll be working on my theory with Heimerdinger."

"…thanks."

"Never thought I'd hear you thank me."

"Well, I never thought I'd end up in an alternate universe, so there."

Ekko snorts and leaves you alone with your thoughts. He's right, it seems this alternate universe is starting to influence you, in a good way from the looks of it. You huff in amusement, letting yourself smile and look out at the silhouette of Piltover in the distance. You owed it to your Silco to see his dream of an equal Zaun and Piltover, and the only way to do that was to go home.

"You doing alright?" You turn to see 'Vander' standing behind you.

"Well, that depends really. Are you talking physically, emotionally or mentally?"

"Even if he doesn't act like it, Silco's worried about you. He's been asking me to talk to you since you won't tell him what's going on."

"Aren't you supposed to keep that last part a secret?" You chuckle. He shrugs, moving over to stand next to you.

"Well, it's out of the bag now, he can't do anything about that. So, are you going to tell me if everything's alright or am I going to have to pry it out of you with alcohol?"

"Hmph." You take a seat and he follows, carefully watching your every move. "If you had to choose between being with the one you love and saving Zaun, which would you pick?"

"I would save Zaun." You blink at him, surprised at the lack of hesitation in his answer. You knew which option he would choose, but the speed at which he gave his answer was unexpected.

"If there's anything I've learnt from all these years, it's that the ones we love are never truly gone. They are right here." He places a hand over his heart. "Felicia, Vi, everyone we've lost, they're kept alive by our memories, our feelings, our thoughts, and are always with us."

"You always know what to say," you huff, choking back the tears. "Never missed a beat, not even once."

"You can always talk to us, little dove. We're always here for you, Silco and I." You throw yourself into Vander's arms, hugging him tightly. He wraps his arms around you in turn, holding you securely in his warm embrace.

Little dove. You never thought you'd hear that nickname again. The dove had died the day you chose to follow Silco down the path towards hell, you still remember the looks of sorrow Vander had given you as you turned your back on him, hate filling your eyes. You'd been angry at him for what he did to Silco, hurled words you wish you could take back, screamed then cried, wrapped in Silco's cold embrace as he whispered of the revenge the both of you would take on Vander.

And you never got the chance to apologise.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry," you wail, clutching at his sleeves. "I should never have said any of that, I shouldn't have cursed you, I take it all back, I take it all back."

"I've already long forgiven you." His words are enough to make you break, screaming out your grief over what you've lost forever. You cry and cry, letting out all your regret, the bottled up emotions finally spilling out after years of containing them for the sake of staying strong. Your nails dig into his arms, gripping onto him for support as your body wracks with every cry. The world around you blurs from the tears and you feel your knees buckle but a pair of strong arms catch you.

"I've got you."

Your body squeezes out one last sob before it collapses, unable to bear the weight of it all anymore.

If only I had your back the same way you always had mine.

When you next open your eyes, you're back on your shared bed with 'Silco', with a singular sea foam coloured eye watching you. He shifts, moving closer to you and gently cups your cheek, thumb gliding over your skin.

"I'm sorry," you whisper. "I thought following you into hell was the best thing I could do for you, but it wasn't. I should have said something, done something to stop you from destroying yourself, cleared your vision when it became clouded, but I was too weak to. I didn't want to lose you, not after losing everything else."

He presses a kiss to your forehead. "I'm right here, just as I promised."

That's right, how could you have forgotten? Promises whispered in the dead of night, huddled on the rooftop under a single coat, lips locking as fingers intertwined, foreheads pressed against each other, time freezing in that moment, the world condensed to just the both of you.

Stay by my side, always?

Always.

Moments clouded by the haze of anger, vengeance and hatred slowly begin to reveal themselves, memories buried the day you turned your back on Vander flooding back into your head. A warm hug, a hand ruffling your hair, deep laughter, the clink of glasses raised in toast to a new future, music playing in the background, a pen nib scratching on paper, hands brushing against one another sending tingles up your spine, a shy smile, lying on the rooftop looking up at nothing, dreaming of a better future.

"Stay, please."

"I'm not going anywhere, love. You're stuck with me forever."

You feel the bed dip as he moves to lie down next to you, slipping his hand into yours. Looking into his eye, you see a glimmer that your Silco lost along with his left eye, a quiet look of adoration, of endless love and you lean in, feeling his soft lips, tasting the scotch he loves to drink.

It feels wrong, this is not your Silco, but just for the moment you let yourself drift away, kissing him deeper, pouring all your love and regret into the act. He kisses back fervently, hungrily devouring you, eye closed as time comes to a stop around the both of you.

"I miss you," you breathe, lips parting. "I miss you so much."

"It's only been half a day."

"Shut up."

"Make me." You slam your lips against his once more, savouring the taste of him, fingers tangled in his hair. He pulls you closer, greedily devouring you. One hand rests on the back of your neck while the other rests on your back as he kisses you like there's no tomorrow. Maybe there is no tomorrow, maybe you have to go back to your universe tonight but right now, all you can think about is how much you've missed this.

Your lips finally part as you gasp for air, lost in the bliss of the moment. You feel his hands cup your cheeks, his forehead pressing against yours as you both bask in each other's presence. He's so warm, nothing like the body you cradled months ago as your world shattered, wails ripped from your throat. His touch is gentle, calloused fingers ghosting over your skin as he holds you like you're the most precious thing in the world.

It's nice, living in this universe where everyone you love is alive and well, where you're happily married to the man you've devoted your life to, but you know you don't belong. Your hands are stained with blood that you can never wash off, Shimmer taints the blood in your veins and your heart is broken beyond repair. In this world of peace, of wholeness, you will never find a place. It's made for the you of this universe, the you who still remembers how to live in a time of peace, who doesn't jump at every shadow believing it to be a threat.

You breathe in deeply, basking in his comforting presence. He still smells of cigar ash and scotch, but it's less sharp. You reach up, placing your hands on top of his and close your eyes. Like this, it's almost as if your Silco is the one cradling your face and you feel a silent tear slide down your cheek.

Damn, you've been crying a lot since you arrived in this universe.

He moves a hand to wipe the tear away, pressing a kiss to the tip of your nose. As he pulls back, his lips curve into a smile and you mentally save the image. You never imagined he could be capable of such levels of love after Vander's betrayal but here he was, having forgiven Vander, having the courage to marry you openly, having the courage to wear his wedding ring on his finger. He was so much stronger than you thought, and you feel bad for doubting him.

I never thought I'd see you smile like that again, even if it's you in another universe. The thought rings in your head and you can't help but let a chuckle slip. The first genuine laugh you've made since arriving in this universe.

"And what's suddenly so funny?" He does his signature head tilt, mockingly glaring at you. It seems some habits remain the same in every universe.

"Nothing," you hum, heart feeling lighter. It's like a weight has been lifted from your chest, and you feel free. You take in his features, remembering every line on your Silco's face, remembering the shape of his scar, remembering his touch, remembering the way he would kiss you, but these memories no longer choke you, no longer crush you under their weight. Instead, they're cast in a radiant glow, preserved in your heart.

He snorts in disbelief but doesn't press it further, choosing to cuddle under the blanket with you. Your fingers thread through his hair, the rhythm slowly lulling him to sleep and soon he's drifted off, allowing you to untangle yourself from him and slip out.

You head to the rooftop, breathing in the cool night air and watch the lights of the city below twinkle. Gone are the bright and aggressive neon lights of the Zaun you're familiar with, replaced with the soft glow of white lights.

It's beautiful. A different kind of beauty, but still as beautiful as the Zaun you know and love. The night breeze whispers in your ear, carrying the hums of the city's nightlife. You lie down on the cold hard floor, reaching up at the sky with one hand and wonder if you will ever be able to grasp the dream of an independent Zaun for your universe.

"Is the bed not comfortable enough for you?" 'Silco' sits down next to your head, leaning back on his palms.

"Nice to see you too." You've never really registered the fact that he doesn't hide his scars in this universe, but under the night lights, the ridges of his scar stand out, drawing your attention to them. He hums, looking out at the sprawling city.

"Do you think we fall in love in every universe?" You blurt out.

He looks over at you, raising an eyebrow. "Feeling sentimental all of a sudden?"

"Just thinking about it."

He hums, deep in thought. "I would like to believe so."

You smile. "Yeah, me too."

As the night goes by, you feel your eyes start to close. It's so tiring, sorting through your bottled up emotions, but as you look up to see 'Silco' smiling, you decide that maybe it's not so bad if it means you get to see him at peace.

The next few days pass by in a blur. You help 'Vander' prepare The Last Drop for the upcoming Innovator's Competition celebration, hanging up the decorations and drop by Ekko's place for updates on the machine. You do what you can to help Ekko, Powder and Heimerdinger out but amidst geniuses, you can only do so much. Still, as the machine comes closer and closer to completion, trepidation creeps in.

Are you really going to throw it all away just to go home?

On the day of the celebration, you take the chance to explore the city a little more, wanting to take in more of the sights before you return to your universe. 'Silco' offers to accompany you but you turn him down, telling him that it would just be a quick in and out. You see his expression falter for just a split second but he lets you go. You thank him, pressing a quick peck on his scarred cheek before slipping out the door, into the familiar yet unfamiliar streets of Zaun.

You wander around aimlessly, wondering if your Zaun will ever reach the same level of prosperity and peace. Children play in the water fountain, laughing as they splash about without a care in the world. Friends stand around, chatting away as if they have all the time in the world. You feel like a stranger here, used to the dark grey and the shadows that make up your Zaun.

Walking past a bakery, the smell of freshly baked bread fills your nose, bringing you back to the time when you had jumped into Silco's arms, laughing as you clutched a bag of fresh bread stolen from a Piltovian bakery, yelling at him to run before the enforcers could catch up. He had stood there for a moment, cheeks flushed before realising what you just said and took off running, gripping tightly onto your arm. You remember the adrenaline that had coursed through your veins, the loud and freeing laughter that rang through the air, the way you had breathlessly pinned him against the wall, kissing him for the first time as enforcers walked past the both of you, the bag of bread pressed between your bodies. You remember his flustered expression as you broke the kiss, adrenaline fading, his conflicted look before he pulled you in for another kiss, this time deeper.

You buy a bun just for old times' sake, tearing off a chunk. It's pretty good, although not as good as the one you stole. You had shared the stolen bread with Silco, cheekily taking a bite from his loaf and scarpering off before he could do the same to yours, his footsteps and shouts getting louder as he gained on you. He had taken his revenge that day, taking a bite from your loaf before flicking you on the forehead, grumbling about how you made him run so much.

You'd only laughed, ribbing him with your elbow before plopping onto your usual bar stool, eyes shining while he took out his notebook with a sigh, still nibbling on his bread and continued calculating The Last Drop's finances. Vander had shook his head in amusement once he found out what was going on, teasing Silco about getting married to you which caused Silco to bury himself further into his notebook, but neither you nor Vander missed the way the tips of his ears turned red.

The bread that day had tasted sweeter than usual, and back then you had chalked it up to a difference in baking but now that you think about it, it was probably because you were sharing it with Silco. You smile, taking another bite of your bread and continue your aimless journey, watching as the city moves all around you, going about their day.

A particular store catches your attention, the jewellery on display glinting in the light and you make your way over, still munching on your bread. Rings, bracelets, piercings and necklaces fill the counter, but a ring in particular catches your attention. It's a simple silver band on the surface, but you recognise the markings carved into it.

"You've got good taste. That ring's special, carved with archaic runes that are said to preserve the feelings of the gifter." The shopkeeper pushes the box in which the ring sits closer to you.

"So I've heard." You trace the runes, remembering the first time you laid eyes on this ring.

It had been during one of your little adventures into Piltover and a particularly fancy box had caught your eye. Making sure no one was looking, your nimble fingers had swiped the box and you disappeared into the shadows, curious about what lay within. Upon opening the box, you were disappointed by the sight that greeted you. It was a simple silver ring, with nothing of note until you looked closer. Something was carved into the metal, patterns that looked like runes. Now that was a ring worth selling. You had pocketed it, wondering how high you could sell it for until you overheard someone talking about proposing to their girlfriend with a ring amidst a flower field.

A romantic gesture huh. You had slipped the ring out again, looking it over. Would Silco appreciate such a gesture? Marriages were few and far between in Zaun, it was something few could even think about, and fewer chose to go with it. You didn't need marriage to know how Silco felt about you, it was as clear as day to those whom you wanted to know about it and that was more than enough for the both of you. Still, it would make a nice gift, so you had pocketed the ring and headed towards The Last Drop where your proposal had gone terribly unromantic.

You let slip a quiet chuckle as you recall that night, hand reaching for the ring hanging around the chain on your neck and tucked underneath your shirt only to grasp at nothing. Oh…right…this version of you never proposed to Silco via that ring so instead he had proposed to you with a different ring that this version of you wore on your ring finger. You fiddle with the ring on your finger, thanking the shopkeeper for her time before heading back to The Last Drop. It is almost time for the celebration, and you want dibs on the first bottle of alcohol opened.

The walk back feels strangely melancholic, maybe it's the colour the setting sun bathes the city in, maybe it's the thought of needing to leave this city behind when you go back to your universe since the machine is so close to completion, but you purposely walk slower than normal. Your fingers brush along the walls of buildings, run over the stone the water fountains are made from, and gently rest on the cooling metal of the benches.

How will you bid farewell to this universe's Silco? You sit on one of the benches, looking up at the sky, lost in thought. Your heart still yearns for Silco, but you also know that you have a responsibility to Jinx and Sevika, both of whom are in your home universe.

"Penny for your thoughts?" You look to your left as Heimerdinger climbs onto the bench, taking a seat next to you.

"No thanks." You turn your gaze back to the sky, arms draped over the bench's backrest.

"I must admit, I don't know what's troubling you, but I do know when someone's carrying a heavy burden." He follows your gaze, looking up at the sky. "And the burden you bear is a terribly heavy one."

"What do you know of carrying heavy burdens?"

"I know that it's heavier when carried alone, and that the bearer tends to think they're alone when in reality they aren't."

You laugh, "your kind live long lives, don't they?"

"Indeed we do."

"Do you have any regrets then?"

"Oh, plenty, but I've learnt to move on from them. No one doesn't have regrets, what defines us is how we deal with them. Some let their regrets consume them and wallow in self-pity, others rise above their regrets and learn from them. The question is how will you deal with yours?" Heimerdinger looks at you.

"I've been ignoring mine, pretending that they don't exist, but I've been forced to confront them here. I know I can't turn back time to fix my mistakes, I know they can never be fixed, but this — this universe, in this universe my regrets don't exist. I can be free of my regrets here, and yet, I have a duty to those from our universe. I have friends, other family, people to lead. I can't just abandon them, but I don't want to lose this paradise either." You heave a deep sigh, closing your eyes. "I don't know if I can lose the one I love for the second time."

"I admire your strength, it's a kind few possess. To still consider duty when it means losing someone you love again, it's a testament to who you are. I cannot claim to understand how you feel, but I have heard that we only ever truly lose someone when we forget them."

"Hmph. Vander." You snort. "Everywhere I go, he still influences the people around him."

"He must be quite the fellow."

"He is. The Hound of Zaun, people called him. Yet he's the gentlest and kindest person I know. And I let him die." Your words fade into a whisper. "All because I wasn't strong enough to steer the one I loved away from the path of destruction."

"You aren't the only one who has stood by and watched as someone they cared about destroyed themself." Heimerdinger bows his head. "I failed my pupil, and not a day goes by where I wonder if I should have done more back then, but I believe I did what I could. With hindsight as my teacher, I learn not to repeat that mistake so that I won't regret it again. I know you have the strength to do the same."

"Such optimism."

"I only speak the truth. Now then, I must go back to the lab and continue working on our way home. Enjoy yourself at the party, time is precious especially when we only have so much of it left."

"Enjoy myself huh. I suppose I can try." You stand up, stretching your limbs. "I doubt there'll be another party any time soon."

The party that takes place that night is nothing like you've ever experienced before. The floor is abuzz with excited young inventors showing off their latest fancy gadgets, alcohol exchanging hands as friends and lovers alike chat the night away, all the while you hang behind the counter, watching the scene unfold.

"Finally acting your age?" 'Benzo' laughs boisterously, slapping you on the back.

"Could say the same about you," you retort, taking a sip from your glass. 'Silco' had left earlier to mingle with other people, but you weren't exactly in the mood to form more relationships you knew were going to end soon. 'Vander' remained behind the bar counter to serve drinks and in the beginning you tried to help him, but you soon began trying each drink that was opened, much to his amusement and he 'fired' you from your job.

"Go out there and have fun, I've got it covered here." He had shooed you away but all you did was move a couple of steps before stopping, refusing to move any further. 'Vander' had sighed but had let you remain there, and still you remain at your spot, even after 'Silco' has long disappeared into the crowd.

Ekko meets your gaze and leans in, "so, what's your answer?"

"I…I need more time to think." You swallow, glancing at where you last saw 'Silco'.

"You don't have much more time." His eyebrows furrow.

"I know. I just…need to sort some things out first, get rid of the monsters of my past that kind of thing," you joke but Ekko doesn't laugh along.

"Tonight, once the party dies down, come with me to the lab. Heimerdinger said he wants to discuss something with us."

"Sure." With that out of the way, you turn to go and find 'Silco'. He at least needed to know that you would be disappearing tonight. Your heart thunders in your chest, anxiety surfacing as you struggle to think of what to say to him. You can't exactly tell him that you're from an alternate universe and might be going back to your universe soon, that would be insane.

You watch as 'Silco' makes his way over to 'Vander', surprised when he slips an arm around your waist and basically hauls you over as well with a smile.

"So, there's a chance for us yet." He places a hand on 'Vander's' shoulder, looking up at the bigger man. He presses a kiss to your forehead, chuckling, "we'll finally get the rest we deserve, love. Aren't you excited?"

Ekko gapes at you, the pieces finally falling into place. "You —"

"The monsters of my past," you smile sadly at him, letting out a deep breath. "You're not the only one."

Ekko shakes his head but you can tell, he understands. You and Silco, your destinies intertwined no matter the universe. I'm sorry, he mouths. 'Vander' pours a drink for 'Silco' who looks at Ekko with a fondness you've never seen before, a mixture of pride and sass.

"Didn't think I'd miss your big day, did you?" 'Silco' smirks.

"Didn't you try to kill him?" Ekko blurts out and you feel 'Silco's' grip on you tighten. You place your hand on his, thumb brushing over the back of his palm and he shoots you a look of gratitude, taking the glass from 'Vander'.

"The greatest thing we can do in life is find the power to forgive." He raises the glass in toast to 'Vander', gaze softening as he turns to you, taking a sip from his glass before handing the rest to you. "Don't get too drunk, love. I'd rather not have to haul you off to bed later."

"I'm not a child," you pout and 'Silco' laughs, nuzzling into your hair. Ekko chuckles, taking a sip from his drink when suddenly, the lights go out and streamers fall from the ceiling. Powder walks in, turning every head within her vicinity. You watch as Ekko steps forward, taking her hand and begins to dance. Their bodies sway to the beat, moving in sync and the crowd moves to make space for the couple. More begin to dance, twirling upon the dance floor as the music picks up and you can't help but watch, wondering what it's like to feel so free.

"May I?" A voice murmurs in your ear and you look down to find a hand extended towards you. 'Silco' smiles encouragingly and you slip your hand into his.

"I've never —"

"Just follow my lead and trust me."

"Don't you go letting me down, you hear?"

"Have I ever?" He pulls you in, pressing a deep kiss to your lips before spinning you around. Soon, you find yourself led by the music and 'Silco's' gentle guidance, your feet gliding over the dance floor. You feel light as a feather, a big smile gracing your features, eyes focused only on 'Silco' whose gaze remains fixed on you. His fingertips ghost over your skin, sending shivers up your spine and you lean in, lips mere inches away from his before you pull away. You can't recall the last time you felt so alive. The air is electrifying, your lungs gasping for air as 'Silco' pulls you in for another kiss, his arms wrapping themselves around you.

Dawn will come, you know, and the night will be over, but while it lasts, you will squeeze it for every drop of enjoyment it has to offer. You inhale his scent, the cigar ash drowned out by the alcohol he's drunk and capture his lips in a fervent kiss. You wrap your arms around his neck, pulling him closer and he indulges you, savouring the taste of your wine-tainted lips.

"I love you," he whispers. "Always, and forevermore."

You open your mouth to say the words you never got to say to your Silco but they get stuck in your throat. You struggle to say something back, emotions threatening to overwhelm you.

"Yeah," you finally manage to breathe out. "I know."

His gaze softens, thumb running over your cheek and you almost don't tell him of your plan to visit the lab tonight but you catch a glimpse of Ekko leaving the party and steel yourself. You have to, this is not your world, as much as you wish it were. You can't keep running away, if Silco can find a way to forgive Vander, you can find a way to forgive yourself.

"Silco?" The word feels foreign on your tongue.

"Yes, love?"

"I need to leave."

"Leave?" He echoes, confused.

"I…Ekko asked me to help him with the finishing touches of his Z-Drive." The excuse is flimsy but 'Silco' buys it anyways. His touch lingers just for a little longer but he lets you go, gently pushing you towards the exit.

"Then you better get going, or the boy wonder is going to need to pull an all-nighter again."

You blink and then smile sadly at him. "Before…I forget. I want — I want to thank you." Grief bubbles to the surface again and you swallow hard. "For everything. Whether you know it or not, you — you've done so much for me. You mean the world to me, you're my everything and — and I don't know what I'd do without you, but I have to try. For your sake and mine. I can't just keep wallowing in despair, grieve as the world moves on around me, I have to move on, keep going one step at a time, because you'd want me to."

Tears prick the corners of your eyes and you whirl around, quickly fleeing as tears flow down your face freely, blurring your vision. You hear 'Silco' call out to you but his voice is muffled by the blood roaring in your ears and the pattering of your shoes against the ground as you run, run and run until you reach the lab.

Ekko and Heimerdinger turn to face you, concern written all over their faces as you harshly wipe away the tears, sniffing.

"So, what's the update?" Your voice wavers.

"Good news! The machine is ready!" Heimerdinger chirps.

"I see. Good thing I've laid the monsters to rest then." You take a deep breath, stepping into the machine with Ekko. "Time to go home."

As the machine comes to life, the arcane begins to whirl around you, howling. This is it, no more going back, no more running away, no more chasing the past. You watch as Heimerdinger connects the power cables, your limbs going numb as he disappears into thin air. Your alternate self's body and Ekko's appear on the floor, unconscious as Powder and 'Silco' run in, eyes wide.

You watch as 'Silco' hugs your alternate self's body to his chest, then looks up at your real body floating inside the sphere. Your gazes connect for the final time and you feel your heart ache. You want to reach out to him, feel his skin on yours one last time, taste his lips one last time, hold him one last time but you know you can't. Your Silco is gone, physically, and there's no bringing him back. So instead you mouth the words you've always wanted to say, trusting that your Silco will hear it anyways from wherever he is in the afterlife, if there even is one.

I love you.

And the arcane snaps everything to black.

[arcane-ish]

Preliminary Zaundads timeline

(note: this is not a great, story, it's just what I think fits the facts presented the most)

Vander either falls in love with his miner buddy Silco or they knew each other first and became miners together.

They strike up friendships with their miner budies, Felicia, Connel and Sevika. Maybe they all meet in this shack to spend their breaks or plot their revolution.

At some point they organize. They create or take over the drop. According to Vi's mom they "turned a crack in the earth into a thriving commuity" on the very day where Vi's mom tells them that she's having a kid and Vander names the kid. She credits both Vander and Silco with having had that idea of creating the thriving community.

At this point Vander is satisfied with what they've achieved (We're done).

[admittedly, that could be sarcasm because he knows that they still have work ahead of them] However, Silco is thinking of more, of Zaun. Felicia describes their situation "living week to week" and says that that's "a lot of shit down here" that she would have to protect Vi from.

Vander seems to be into the idea of raising children and already talks about raising more than just a single one.

She talks about carving Zaun out of the bedrock through menial work ("blisters") and that Silco and Vander will figure it out together. Silco toasts to Zaun. Vander only toasts to blisters and bedrock (note that he calls back to that in the letter to writes to Silco after nearly killing him).

Vi gets born, Powder gets born. It seems Mylo and Claggor are sort of around?

Note that even though Powder and Vi are older, their mom and dad still work as miners.

My theory:

1.) Whatever Vander and Silco and the others were doing, they probably funded themselves through the mines? That's why Felicia and Connel kept mining. Or maybe they do deeper tunnels for additional housing? My theory is still that their big thing was to take over the mine they were working in and running it themselves (seize the means of production!) and they were able to fund a their thriving community.

2.) At this point Vander and Silco's relationship becomes more and more unhappy. And Vander distracts himself by throwing himself more and more into his role as an uncle and living vicariously through Felicia and Connel's relationship.

Vi and Powder apparently have a very happy childhool.

However something happens, leading to the Day of Ash uprising. (maybe something threatens their "thriving community") Where Felicia dies and Vander snaps and attacks Silco. However, he afterwards feels bad and writes him a letter, but Silco keeps his distance, not returning for years later.

Now, granted, most of this is still pretty unsatifying. For example, everything about Vi and Powder's childhood looks way too pristine and clean. Mining looks too happy and clean for how shit it should be.

Even Vander's Lanes after he drove out Silco were never that clean. (this is probably my hate for beardless Vander talking, maybe beardless Vander = Vander's self image of his more innocent self)

And that is aside that head canoning Vander and Silco running a criminal enterprise together is just way more fun than them completely sanely funding it through respectable mining.

How exactly did Vander get his Hound of Underground name anyway? I like to headcanon that he was a pit fighter like Vi, but was that before he became a miner or during or afterwards?

And how exactly did he get a reputation as a revolutionary at all when it feels that he barely did anything?

I'm just gonna pretend:

1.) Warwick is not dead. His healing factor will kick in. 2.) These are just the happy, sanitized, idealized memories of Vander's. We will get another flashback that will reveal that the truth was way darker and more fucked up and that Vander's happy memories were as fake as Viktor's happy cult community.

WHAT DO YOU MEAN THIS WILL PROBABLY NOT HAPPEN BECAUSE THERE'S ONLY THREE MORE EPISODES AND THOSE WILL BE DEDICATED TO OTHER STORYLINES THAT STILL NEED TO WRAP UP. I CAN'T HEAR YOU.

[j4gm]

SPOILERS!!! REFERENCES AND EASTER EGGS IN F&C ep. 2: SIMON PETRIKOV

Let me know if I missed anything!

First of all the title sequence is fucking cool. I don't want to speculate about the various things we see in it, like the apartment getting blown up or the Fern tree growing into its 1000+ version, because I'm sure the show will get round to all that!

The first scene was an awesome reintroduction to the post-apocalypse, showing us the dynamic between Simon and Marcy. The button popping off Marcy's dungarees was a reference to young Marcy's first appearance, Memory of a Memory, when she removed one of the buttons herself to fix Hambo's eye.

Simon was show playing a live set at Dirt Beer Guy's tavern in Obsidian. It seems they've gotten to know each other quite well over the past twelve years. Dirt Beer Guy asks Simon if he's read his new book draft, about a character called Joe Milkshake who was first mentioned in the episode Root Beer Guy.

Despite the fact we saw Jake in the trailers, Finn and T.V. pretty much confirm in this scene that Jake is dead, and has presumably been dead since before Obsidian. I guess Bronwyn wasn't the only Jake descendant who Finn took on as an apprentice, but T.V. doesn't seem all that into it. The Finn and Jake we saw in the trailer are likely from an alternate universe that we have yet to see.

Finn uses his weed whacker to cut through these bushes. A nice way of showing he's fully recovered from his Fern guilt. The focus here is very much on Simon's problems instead of Finn's.

Finn parts with Simon to go and visit Huntress Wizard. The nature of their relationship remains ambiguous and I expect it to stay that way.

Simon has the Island Lady from The Party's Over Isla de Señorita in his phone. I guess they reconnected after he became Simon again. He also has Abracadaniel. I always liked Ice King's friendship with Abracadaniel and the rest of the Order of Giuseppe so I hope they're still friends!

Cute Bubbline scene. Back in the episode Bonnibel Bubblegum, Mr. Creampuff suggested he and PB get matching tattoos. Now she's (trying to) do the same with the girl she's chosen rather than some guy who was chosen for her! Also Marceline is using the same phone she's been seen with in a few previous episodes, including Go With Me and Be Sweet.

I think the flying human city is called Up-Ton.

Choose Goose! He keeps coming back! And he's evil now! People were joking about him being the antagonist of Fionna and Cake after that weird post-credits scene in Wizard City and the fact he was in hell in Together Again. I wasn't expecting that to actually come true. Glob knows why he's hanging out in a cage in Simon's house.

The pattern of GOLB's eyes is reflected in Simon's glasses during the ritual. He is doing the same dance that Betty was doing to summon GOLB in the finale.

Among the objects in Simon's GOLB shrine are the Farmworld Enchiridion, the flying carpet that Simon stole from Ash and was later frequently used by Betty, the crocodile clips that Betty used for her magic rituals, two effigies of GOLB, and what looks to be the shell of the snail who was seen throughout the original series.

In this credits sequence, Fionna and cake are dreaming about the mask being worn by the bear than Finn slew, and a butterfly with a smiley face on it. Perhaps symbolising Finn?

Tune in next week for episodes 3 and 4!

[forgetyoursingalongsandlullabies]

I don’t think we talk enough about what a big gesture it was for Martin to give Jon the ashes of Jane Prentiss.

Jane initially targeted Martin and had him trapped and isolated for 2 weeks (and we know the kind of effect isolation has on Martin) eventually forcing him to move into the institute for his safety. Everyone who was involved in the attack on the institute has every right to be terrified and traumatized by Jane Prentiss’ memory but Martin does especially. If Martin had wanted her ashes for himself as a reminder that she is dead he would be completely justified but I think even if Martin had wanted them for himself he wouldn’t have gone through the trouble of getting them, even if he thought they’d be a comfort. He would only go through the trouble for Jon.

Martin approached Jordan Kennedy, a man whom he had no prior interaction with, who is not just an exterminator but who works for the European Centre for Disease Prevention and Control and somehow convinces him to give him the ashes of a well known and well recorded hazardous figure. Jordan even admits to Jon that he should not have given Martin the ashes at all. Martin takes these literal human remains of his own stalker and torturer and gifts them to Jon so that he can be comforted in the knowledge that she is dead. Because more than Martin wants to be comforted himself, he wants Jon to feel safe.

Even when Jon was suspicious that Martin was literally trying to sabotage him by being too sweet and thought the ashes were probably fake he still believed for some reason that this one gesture from Martin was genuinely to make him feel better.

Tbh Jon getting confirmation from Jordan that the ashes are in fact real in MAG 55 followed by Martin telling him that his CV is fake only one episode later in MAG 56 is such a strong combination for making sure Jon was subconsciously smitten before going on the lam in season 3.

[fathercharlesoffdensen]

"Charles invading Magneto's mind (an act Magneto's right to call a violation) leaves Erik stranded in the literal freezing waters of his lifelong PTSD. Those tumultuous ocean waves, an obvious metaphor for Erik's mind, threaten to sweep both Erik and Charles away. 'Both' is Episode 10's key word. Charles Xavier could've easily consigned Magneto to his agony and gone about his business. Instead, he makes a choice simultaneously selfless and selfish. He doesn't fight Bastion (Theo James) with his X-Men. He stays in Magneto's mind and risks not just his own life, but his psyche. Even though the gesture doesn't excuse Charles's mental attack, he seizes this rare opportunity to help his beloved friend escape his emotional torment. Charles Xavier will either drag Erik free or drown with him, holding him close in the seething ocean.

"Charles is the only person capable of reaching Magneto because they're equals and opposites. Call them polar magnets or counterbalancing scale weights — or just soulmates. They complete one another, overused Jerry Maguire quote or not. Magneto hears Rogue's (Lenore Zann) distraught voice crying out to him in his amnesiac darkness. Hers is the only face he sees from his memories. Yet without erasing or diminishing his obvious love for Rogue, Erik also adores Charles. He has for decades. Even when they were physically apart, Charles rested in Erik's mind. Blocking out Xavier's influence is why Magneto wears his helmet. As Rogue wisely points out to Erik in Episode 2, 'You were worried if you still felt how much he loved you, you wouldn't be able to go through with your crusade.' That helmet is Magneto's armor against love.

"So, of course, it's Charles who reminds his fragmented self of the identity he forged from the ashes. Charles's compassion succeeds for the first time not because X-Men '97 backpedals their 'Magneto was right' statement in Xavier's favor. Rather, Charles finally works to meet Erik where he is. Erik might be an island because of and despite himself, but his fate needn't be forever lost and always losing. Charles reminds him they are a chosen family of two. He bleeds the poison from Erik's heart. And Magneto emerges reborn, reclaiming himself, his memories, and his purpose. He couldn't have a true redemption arc without Charles at his side."

[purpleshimmer]

Music Videos in Season Two vs Season One

@thenationofzaun made a post about this too so I won’t talk too much about what they already said, but I wanted to talk a bit about why I feel the music videos in this season aren’t working the way they did in season 1

Spoilers below!

I love love love the music videos/sequences in season two, I really do! I think all the artists did an incredible job and the soundtrack is full of bangers so far. I love that Fortiche is branching out with different animation styles like the comic book sequence in episode 3 and the watercolor pictures in the flashback with vander. However, because they’re trying to fit so many plot points in 9 episodes they’re using these 2 minute music videos to tell stories and explain events that should’ve been given at least 15-20 minutes of screentime. The music videos are a great way to experiment with new animation styles and set up plots/events, which they did perfectly in season 1. 

S1E5 - “Enemy”

Enemy is played as Vi walks through the bar on her way to confront Sevika. However, we got plenty of context beforehand! We know why Vi is angry with Sevika, how she knew where to even find her, and got a really great fight scene between the two after the music played. The song showed Vi being badass and cool and set the mood for the fight, but wasn’t used to replace the Vi vs Sevika conflict. 

Compare this to something like the "Hellfire" music video in S2E3, where we don’t even see the task force enter Zaun. We should have seen Vi’s internal struggle with joining the Enforcers like she did in episode 1, but instead we can only assume that the event at the memorial service moved her enough for her to abandon her beliefs about the enforcers that she’s held since she was a small child and join them. We don’t get to see how Steb, Loris, Vi, Maddie, and Caitlyn work together and what their dynamics are like. We don’t see what Vi’s reaction is to releasing toxic gas on her own people, or them raiding the Vyx, we only see the aftermath of that and the scene in the arcade. The music video should have been used to set up the events, and then at least a few minutes of the episode should have shown the first raid on Zaun by the task force.

S1E6 - “Guns for Hire”

This is one of my favorite parts of season 1. The entire episode led up to the huge moment at the end where Jinx lit the flare to try and find her sister and for Piltover to block Zaun citizens out of Piltover. The end scene didn’t need to have dialogue or be drawn out because it was already explained for the entire episode. The music served its purpose by making us feel emotional and setting the next episodes. The same goes for “What Could Have Been” at the end of episode 9. I feel the same way about Woodkid’s other song, “To Ashes and Blood” in S2E3. The whole episode led up to that moment, so I think it was fine to have a music sequence as the final battle played out. 

S1E7 - “Misfit Toys”

This is the most “official” music video in season 1; the others are more so sequences with music played overtop of them instead of dialogue. The music video sets us up with information that we should know about the firelights BEFORE officially meeting them. We learn from the lyrics and the video that they are a group of Zaunites that are working to stop Silco and provide people a safe place to get away from Silco’s shimmer-ravaged city. It’s also just a great song and an incredible music video with a unique style. However, this isn’t ALL that we see of the Firelights. It’s used as a supplement, not a replacement, to their story. At least 1/3rd of episode 7 is about the Firelights, Ekko, and their relationship with Silco’s Zaun and Piltover, allowing for the audience to sympathize and connect with them further. 

This episode also features “Dynasties and Dystopia,” another great music video sequence. I love that it switches between Jinx and Ekko currently and as friends. It expands on their history and draws attention that these two used to be close friends, but are now trying to fight to the death. It works, in my opinion, because we already knew that they were friends, as this was established in the first three episodes of the show. The music video added to our knowledge, but wasn’t the first time we learned that they were friends. 

S2E1 - “I Can’t Hear It Now”

This one was so beautiful and made me sob the first time I watched it. The end of episode nine and the first parts of this episode prepared us for Cassandra’s death, and the funeral serves to show us Caitlyn’s reaction to it. It’s absolutely heartbreaking and beautiful; I wouldn’t change a single thing about this scene. 

S2E2 - “Sucker” 

I LOVE this song and I really like the music video that goes along with it. HOWEVER, the music video should have played at the beginning of the episode to remind the audience of the turf wars between the chem barons, and then at least half of the episode should have expanded on those conflicts. Instead we just got the two scenes with Smeech, who died almost immediately after. We never get to see Margot or Chross again, despite the fact that they are almost certainly still fighting. What was the result of that? We see the displaced people coming to Zauna and later Viktor’s camp, but why didn’t we get to see any of the political struggles between them (or any of the chem barons before their deaths)? We don’t get to learn about their organizations, we don’t see more of their personalities, we don’t see them fight outside of the music video, nothing. Maybe I’m just biased because I’ve loved the chem barons since their brief appearance in season 1, but the only reason I wasn’t upset about their small amount of screen time in season 1 was because I was expecting them to play a huge role in season 2. 

I loved the “Renegade” sequence, that was really fun and I don’t have anything negative to say about it other than that I wish my best friend Smeech didn’t get killed. 

S2E6 -"Remember Me"

I actually like this one! Putting aside the flaws with this plotpoint bc that’s not what this post is about, I actually think this one was well incorporated. We already knew some background about Vander and Silco’s relationship from season one, so this wasn’t sprung upon us randomly, and we even got a decently long flashback scene between the two. The music video was used to show a bit more information that could accurately be portrayed through the watercolor animation and without any dialogue, which I think it did successfully. 

S2E5 - “Cocktail Molotov” 

Again, I love this sequence, the song fits perfectly with the situation and it was exciting to watch. However, instead of playing at the beginning to set up Vi’s new living situation, it was the only part of her pitfighter life that we got to see. This was especially strange to me because of how much Riot hyped up pitfighter Vi before the season dropped; I really thought it would be a major part of the episode. We didn’t get to see a full fight between her and an opponent, we didn’t see any conversations between her and Loris, we didn’t even see how she ended up as a fighter in the first place. It was just “look at how cool she is! Also she’s drunk and sad” but we never got the chance to connect with her and feel what she was going through the way we did in season one when she was experiencing changes and struggles in her life.  

I didn’t cover all the songs bc this post is already really long, but that’s kind of how I’m feeling atm. I’d love to hear you guys’ opinions in the comments/tags!! Again I still love the music videos. I just think the ones in season 1 were better. I really hope I’m not sounding like I hate the show or something. I feel like a lot of my recent posts have been super negative 😭 I still love the show, I just have more criticisms with this season than I did for season 1, as I think a lot of people do.

[themadsquirrel09]

Eric and Kenny: the paranormal connection (Season 1 to 7)

Some of this has been explored in analysis like this one, but I wanted to look into Eric's and Kenny's mystical connection 🪄

The transplant

Eric steals Kenny's eyes 〰 S3E3 ☆ The Succubus

There are real life stories about people having personality changes after organ transplants.

"The most intriguing finding involved 'disconnected memories.' Several recipients reported vivid memories that seemed unrelated to their past experiences. These memories often involved sensory details, potentially linked to the organ donor."

I think it is also implied that Eric's optometrist is actually a monster (?).

The view of the fandom: For what I've noticed, it is a common headcanon that Kenny and Eric are connected since the transplant. There are fanartist who draw Cartman with heterochromia, mostly keeping one eye brown, or hazel, and the other blue.

I have heard mismatched eyes can be related to being able to see "the other world". Seems like Native American cultures believe people or animals with different colored irises see heaven and earth at the same time; in the pagan traditions of Europe, this was associated with witchcraft. I could not find a reliable source for this, though.

If you are wondering, eyes do not change color because of a transplant, or at least not like that; but it looks great and I think it works because it is South Park: weird things happens there.

We get to see that Kenny has blue eyes on S01E08 ∣ Starvin' Marvin. And Princess Kenny has purple eyes.

Kenny could actually have both; it is said Liz Taylor's eyes shifted color between blue and purple.

Through Kenny's eyes, Wizard Cartman has blue eyes!

Ghost message

Kenny dies in the movie and he appears to Eric as a ghost 〰 South Park: Bigger, longer, uncut.

This analysis is one I haven't found! So why is Eric is the only one who can see Kenny's ghost in the movie? or is the right question: why does Kenny only shows himself to Eric?

Let's explore some possibilities:

Eric is the only who can see Kenny because he has his eyes. It makes sense and the Succubus episode airs before the movie. For what I've found, this is usually the view of the fandom.

Kenny and Cartman have unfinished business. Since they made a bet just before the death! Kenny won the bet, but Cartman didn't pay. Some believe people with unfinished business are stuck and connected to the person who owes them.

It is said that ghosts and demons target the weakest: Cartman is a psycho, yes, also a very lonely child. In this scene Liane is singing to Eric, he asks her to keep going, but she "has to save her voice for work". Before she goes, Eric confronts about the porno video: she lies to him and goes away. Right after that, Kenny appears.

I think the V-chip could also have something to do, since electricity is shocking Cartman every time he curses and ghost are detected as electromagnetic changes in the ambience. It is a bit far fetched (?), but maybe he was working as a medium thanks to the chip.

Because it's funny! The idea of Cartman intimidated by Kenny is just something to giggle to.

1 body, 2 souls

Eric drinks Kenny's ashes and shares his body with him for almost a month 〰 A Ladder to Heaven ☆ S6E12 to The biggest douche in the universe ☆ S6E15.

I mean, wow. Cartman does not only access his memories, he feels like Kenny and sees through his eyes.

And what about what Kyle says? Is that just a fat joke, or could he be referencing the animated postcard that initiated South Park? If you watch it, you see a boy who looked like Cartman, but he was called Kenny. He dies.

They both die.

The name of a person can be important in literature and magic. Long ago, some people didn't revealed their name because it was believed that if other knew it, they could have power over them. An animation which references this is Spirited away (2001).

The awakening

The way Kenny awakes is awesome! This memory makes him speak up throughout Eric:

Kenny awakes at the the third time he shouts "Shut up Cartman, you blood-belching vagina!".

If you like horror, you probably have read or seen this: the act of repeating something 3 times can be a way to summon something or someone. We also get to see this on S11E10 ∣ Hell on Earth 2006!

Kenny was so willful to stand up for himself that he took control over Eric's body just to be heard; at the end of the episode, something similar happens:

After Kenny and Cartman start sharing a body, it all escalates. We see Kenny overpowering the speech and actions. After almost a month, Eric is dying because of this and they have to exorcise him.

My curse is to remember

Lets consider that Eric remembers Kenny's deaths and also a bunch of stuff he should not! 〰 Volcano ☆ S1E3, Cartmanland ☆ S5E6, and others.

The boys go camping and Cartman starts playing with a gun, but it sounds like he is having war flashbacks. Stan says he is lying and of course he could be right, but what if Eric does remember? Pasts lives, Kenny's deaths and who knows what else.

Even if it has never been confirmed, it all points towards the fact that Cartman remembers Kenny's deaths. Here you find my favorite evidence compilation.

Eric seems to be the only one who knows Kenny dies, also he tries to do something about it sometimes. In the End of obesity special we have him trying to reach for Kenny's hand.

Of course, Cartman remembering this kind of stuff can just be a gag, it also aligns with his character as he is some sort of trickster: on cartoon, the most likely archetype to know things they shouldn't, or break the 4th wall.

With South Park, this can be relevant or not, we don't know because of its negative narrative, which I love!

I do think Kenny and Cartman' s paranormal connection is there and their destiny is intertwined by the narrative, but only time will tell.

This was made for the @kenmanweek2023 💘

[pascallatte]

Mando's Lover?

Pairing: Pedro Pascal x Actress!reader

Summary: The Mandalorian interview but why are you included? (read to find out 😉)

Date: August 2019

Taglist: @benonlinear, @t-stark35, @heyitsme-2, @elleeeee21, @holmesstrange, @tagakalat, @flyestvenustrap, @oldermenaremyreligion, @cherryred444, @avengersheart, @guacala, @pukka-latte, @hobiismyhopeu, @lilvampirina, @ilovehotdadsandshit

A/N: AAAAA we're almost entering my favourite part of the series, but, I might post some throwbacks before we head to that though so stay tuned and like always, enjoy!! also kind of a late post but you know. hehe

Series Masterlist

The pair are seen on the red carpet during this year’s D23 Expo on The Mandalorian, which was to be released three months from now.

“Ok I'm gonna recreate your reaction to-being-casted celebration,” the interviewer, Ash, said as she shook hands with Pedro. She recreated his celebratory reaction making Pedro watch as she continued.

“That’s right. It was- it was a three-act event react play. Yeah, it was like “Oh thank you thank you”.. pass out,” He said also reenacting with an exaggerated crying look on his face, clearly having fun at what was happening.

She brings the mic closer to her to ask him her second question, “But can you walk me through actually finding out you were cast as The Mandalorian.” Pedro who was once looking at her intently, turned to look downwards remembering how that day went. 

“Well I got a call and the actual words were “Jon Favreau wants to talk to you about something Star Wars” and so I said absolutely and I went out to meet him at his offices in Playa Vista and he invited me into a room where he introduced me to Dave Filoni and in this room, it was wall-to-wall, immaculate illustrations of this series which is everything Star Wars-”

He continues to share his precious moments before the final revelation, “-And so being a Star Wars fan myself I was like, “oh what’s this” and “oh I remember that” and “what are you gonna do here” and “what do you want me to do?”” Pedro rambles on about asking them what creature, robot, or whatever role they wanted him to audition for before taking a deep breath.

“-and they looked confused and basically pointed to the- this incredible like silhouette of The Mandalorian. He said you’re the, you’re The Mandalorian. So yeah that’s why I- that’s why I sort of died inside of joy.”

Nodding at his response Ash looks at him,” Who was the first person you ever told when you got the job? Since the role became like a very important one for you.”

Scratching the back of his neck, “Well, y/n was picking me up from Jon’s place, so naturally, I told her fir-actually, I freaked out on her. I kept blabbering on things I can’t even remember you know, it must be the adrenaline I felt at that moment. And then- just then did I call my sister, who is a big Star Wars fan, saying how I’m a part of the huge franchise that she loves and now we’ve done and are about to release the first season, it makes me really happy.” Ending his response with a content smile.

“How could you not? I mean, you mentioned you were a Star Wars fan, so what’s your earliest Star Wars memory? Do you remember like-“ Ash inquired once again, wanting to know more about him and his experience as an interviewer.

Pedro enthusiastically blurted out,” I saw Star Wars- I saw episode four in the movie theatre. I was very young so I don’t remember the experience of being in the theatre for it as well as I do the empire strikes back which is burned into my childhood imagination and  I remember like three attempts to get tickets for return of the Jedi and getting my heart broken every time because it was sold out, and then finally getting the tickets and literally you know like staring at the poster being like I’m finally seeing this movie so it was highly present in my childhood. All the toys you know and all the stories yeah.”

“And now you’re in it,” Ash said, seemingly into his history with Star Wars.

Agreeing with her, “And now I’m in it. it’s weird, leading the series”

“Now, back to being an avid Star Wars watcher. What was your reaction when you were first introduced to your now-girlfriend, Y/n L/n, who played the character Sabe in the phantom menace?"

Pedro looks at her with a look that he knows what she was up to and decides to keep it short, "Yeah well like I knew it was her when we first met but I didn’t like barging into her space telling her that I’ve watched her in Star Wars and loved it because that would be weird coming from this guy you’ve never met before. But now, I can say that we’re now also together in another galaxy."

"Did you ever think you would ever meet her in person or like be with her all those years ago?"

Crossing his arms, thinking for a moment, "I didn’t really well- but to start it off I didn’t even think I would be able to meet her in any way, since she was like in the spotlight already at such a young age so I didn’t really think about it. That was until we got introduced that is and it was one of the best moments in my life," finishing it off with a shy smile.

“That’s sweet, do you think we’ll ever see Y/n as part of your series, The Mandalorian?”

“Good question but we haven’t thought about it really. But with the number of times she’s been on set they should’ve made a character just for her don’t you think?” Pedro said laughing. “Last question, what role from The Mandalorian would you think y/n would fit in if she were to be cast?” she quickly stated as their time's almost up.

Pedro gave her a teasing knowing look, “Ummm Mando’s lover, no I'm joking. But maybe someone in the ranks, probably not a Mandalorian cause she'll look-" he makes a tiny sign from his hands, laughing at himself, "-wearing the armour. Maybe a Jedi, we don’t know really, she can play herself actually. She’ll take whatever they give her.”

[randomnessofthehighestorder]

My ranking of Arcane S2 soundtrack

Because they outdid themselves this season…

(Spoilers ahead)

Paint the Town Blue - Ashnikko came up with such a bop for our favourite Loose Cannon and her followers. Consider me a Jinxer for life! 💙

Ma Meilleuer Ennemie - this scene was so beautiful! Ekko and Powder dancing the night away, I could feel their chemistry from the other side of the screen. Timebomb shippers, rejoice! Oh, what could’ve been…

Enemy (intro version) - the song stayed the same for the intro, but the visuals! So much symbolism! My Film Studies brain and English brain were analysing like the wind! Also this song is a classic…

Come Play - as an Arcane fan and a Stay, it made me so happy that they were gonna be featured on the soundtrack, especially when I heard it in the most epic scene in the show: Zaun entering the war against Noxus, the twin cities united against a common enemy. (Stray Kids everywhere, all around the world!)

Remember Me - the intro was so hauntingly good and the main song was so beautiful. It always makes me think of the scene it came with: Vander’s watercolour memories of life before the bridge riot, which in turn makes me cry. This show really knows how to tug on my heartstrings…

Blood Sweat and Tears - I know Ambessa was the villain of the season, but you gotta admit, her song and music video was awesome! I mean, she proved herself worthy of life in front of the Kindred and survived being shot with an arrow, while being pregnant with Mel! She truly is the Matriarch of War. (And yes, that is her official LoL champion title)

Sucker - I had Ep 2’s opening on loop because of this song, it’s so good! The scene that went with it was so good too. Jinx walking through Zaun in the aftermath of Silco’s death, avoiding the Chembaron war at all costs. Man, it really set the tone for the episode…

Heavy is the Crown - this dramatic remix of the 2024 Worlds anthem was perfect for this scene. When the strike team pulled up in the council meeting, I was like “oh shit, it’s getting serious”.

Hellfire - Caitlyn was on a path of vengeance in this scene, but the animation was so cool! The strike team really tore up the Lanes…

Renegade (We Never Run) - I have never danced so much to a fight scene, but this song made me bounce as ass was being kicked. Jinx and Sevika are so badass!

What Have They Done To Us - when the family reunited, I cried so much! What a way to end an episode. The song made it extra sad… 😭

The Line - twenty one pilots outdid themselves with this song! But the scene it came with made me shed a tear lowkey. Vander’s memories fading away in favour for Viktor’s glorious evolution…

Fantastic - CaitVi finally hooked up! True love wins! 👩‍❤️‍👩 🎉

Cocktail Molotov - Vi’s emo pit fighter era was so cool, despite the fact that this was also her post breakup era. Take note: alcohol and violence is not the best way to get over a breakup…

Rebel Heart - another Djerv Jinx anthem and it’s glorious. A perfect way to set off a rebellion, anarchy style! 🤘

To Ashes and Blood - this scene was so epic. The boys going through an Arcane mind trip, while the strike squad battle Jinx and Sevika. This was when I realised shit was getting so real… (also those chants are Shuriman. For those LoL players and loreheads, IYKYK…)

Isha’s Song - she made the ultimate sacrifice to protect her mama. Rest in Peace, Isha… 😭

Wasteland - poor Jinx. She went through it this season. It made me want to give her a hug. 🫂 Hopefully she found peace and broke the cycle…

The Beast - a metal song for such a metal character. Warwick Vs Jinx was so terrifying and so awesome at the same. There’s a reason his champion title is the Uncaged Wrath of Zaun…

I Can’t Hear It Now - RIP Cassandra Kiramman. This scene was so beautiful and sad…

Spin the Wheel - I did not know Mick Wingert could sing, but this song was so adorable! Contrasted with the flashback from the other universe, it really showed how things are different there…

These songs were amazing and such great fits for the show! I wish this show never ended so we could get more amazing music collabs along with amazing animation… if you haven’t heard the soundtrack, go listen to it!

[squib-2006]

So I’ve finally got some of my thoughts on the new season in order and letting my self sit on it for a while

Dragons rising season 2 spoilers!!!!!

So first off holy shit this season has managed to completely wipe out any fears I had for season two. I’m a generally anxious person and am pretty naturally pessimistic about most things and was pretty anxious about season 2 because from the stuff shown in trailers and promotional vids it looked like a “Lloyd chosen one” plot line and I have a history of hating that kinda thing because it’s been beaten to death in ninjago at this point. While a bit of that was there I found it was done quite tastefully and didn’t overwhelm everything else story wise.

I felt that the pacing of the first 6-7ish episodes was a bit all over the place. Having the training arc and the Cole-Zane plot lines happen in the same episode with the pov switching back in forth felt a little bit off to me.

Sora and arins character arcs are shaping up to be pretty good. Soras more confident in her self than season one and she’s trying to help Arin but I feel like the whole using her elemental power to help Arin will backfire into her face. Arin’s insecurity and the whole how can I be useful if I don’t have an element I fell is being handled way better than the dumb kai arc in season 11(dw I will get to that when I get to kai) and it’s about on par with the Lloyd powerless plot from hunted. I am really excited to see what they do next and if Arin will be really mad at sora or not cuz like he’s super nice and stuff and I fell like he would be sad instead of mad.

Nya didn’t really have a lot going on personally except the stuff with Jay which I’m iffy on because so much of Nyas character in older seasons revolved around Jay and I just hope they don’t go back to that and let her character breath a bit.

In the topic of Jay I really really REALLY hope he isn’t evil. That the idea because it’s really out of character and they are already pushing my buttons with the lost memory crap because that’s something that I’ve rarely seen done well at all and it makes me very nervous and I just don’t like it. I do like that Jay just seems to be a guy who hates his job tho that’s fun.

I think the writers are just having fun with Zane and I think that’s cool. I do wanna punch the administration guy who said Zane isn’t a person because he is and he’s a bean and I will not allow this nobody to slander him.

It was nice to see more of Cole this season. I swear him and geo are so cute. The hand holding and the fact that they basically adopted two kids together is amazing and I am fully on board for this ship.

The villans were really interesting. I hope they keep up the quality with them because the mystery of ras’ master and wtf happened with jordana is really exciting. Cinder was intresting and as someone who has no interest in men what so ever I am kinda baffled at why so many people want this man but hey you do you. I do wonder what happened to ash tho. The member of the forbidden five looks interesting too and part of me is hoping that the leaked “evil jay” minifig is actually this guy just powered up cuz the color palette is similar enough and I just don’t want an evil jay.

Wyldfyre is amazing her whole leg being broken then sneaking on the ship to the exasperation of kai (like he would totally have pulled something like this a few seasons ago the hypocrite <3) and the others was so good. I am curious about her talk with egalt she mentioned one of her family members getting the wasting sickness but it can’t be heat wave cuz he seems fine so maybe she had more than one dragon guardian??? I do hope that Kai’s portal abduction does affected going into part 2 and that she bonds with nya and the others over it.

Egalt and rontu were very interesting to me and I’m glad they didn’t go the route of them being the actual creators of spinjitzu and kept the lore consistent I was slightly worried about that. Hope they come back in part 2 too.

Bonzle was a big surprise for me. I likes her personality in season 1 but I didn’t expect her to be so important. She’s really sweet and the scene with wu was great too.

And finally last but definitely not least, the best character in this entire show and my favorite comfort character to beat the shit out of

KAI

IT WAS SO FREAKING GOOD. I LITERALLY HAVE NOT BEEN THIS HAPPY WITH AN EPISODE SINCE SEASON 4 EPISODE 7 THE FORGOTTEN ELEMENT (iykyk) I was literately kicking my feet like a little girl and crying and screaming my head off to the point I woke up other family members. Him unlocking the rising dragon technique by having his sister help and being in harmony with his family is so fucking sweet and I cried like a little bitch it was so good. I am also so happy that they used his old hair and didn’t just slap a smaller version of his current hair onto him (tho I kinda wish they had used the fucked up custom hair that was in the older episodes but I doubt that model is even in their hands so whatever(side side note I love the fucked up hair so much it’s so stupid I love it and will forever miss it)) him being such a dad to wyld fire was so sweet and then using the rising dragon technique after he saw his family in danger was just perfect. I do kinda wish there was more of a dramatic reaction to him getting yeeted by ras into the portal (kinda like any of the other ninja “deaths/major injuries”) but im fine with what we got. Except I kinda hate that only nya has an outward reaction in the aftermath. No lloyd reaction no Cole reaction and nothing from Zane and it makes me mad because every other time a ninja had their moment there was a whole team reaction. But I’m feeling like that’s to nitpicky and there’s still ten more episodes to fix that so fingers crossed. But kai also encouraging bonzle to close the portal even if he’s trapped inside is such a kai thing and hit me like a truck. Also him calling bonzle kid dispite her being much much older than him is funny and sweet cuz Kai’s big brother/father figure side is coming through and it’s so sweet. And the ninja never quit line is so great I was sobbing even more after that. (Tho I don’t know why he said he got it from Lloyd when it would have made more sense to have it be from master wu cuz that’s where he learned it but eh whatever).

While im really happy about kai finally getting some well deserved angst im also very anxious about it too. This could be the perfect opportunity for the writers to just conveniently forget about him for a while and idk if i could sit through that. Kai is a huge part of why I watch ninjago and he’s always been handed the shortest stick character development wise and technically he never got his own focus season either (and no i dont count the pilots because that focused mainly on all the ninja and was only two episodes, i also don’t count season four because it was more a group season, and season 11 doesn’t count because he got a half baked b plot that sucked) I’m very worried that I will loose enjoyment in the show because I dropped the show out of disappointment after season 11 because A LOT of premonitional material made it seem like a kai season and I got my hopes up and was let down so much. I’m very cautious when getting excited about things involving kai in particular because of that and I’m just hoping the writers don’t fuck it up.

Ok that’s enough negativity for once. I’m so excited for more and am foaming at the mouth for more!

[pokenoire]

The influence Ranma 1/2 in Serena written

Presenting the differences between their arcs, while Akane was seeking acceptance in the femininity she wanted to convey, Serena's hair is also about her development, we are introduced to a character without a clear objective, you are being pressured into something you don't want to do. But when she is put to use putting her knowledge into practice for someone else, her childhood crush shows herself that what she neglects can be fun and enjoyable.

Each strand that falls is a memory that goes, it is her previous journey left behind as well as her indecisions, each new change shows its development little by little

Now that she has gone through the problem and faced her fears, now that she has gone through the process of understanding what she wants, her crying is no longer about the sadness of loss but about the realization of a new and better future.

"Nothing like a good crying"

Crying is part of releasing old or new frustrations, freeing your emotions from what bothers you and is relieving and brings dopamine, the habit of not crying leads to health problems.

I like the similarities in these scenes, how the audience is disappointed with the change but the show reinforces that this is Serena's best decision for herself and Ash himself or Ranma are the only ones who are aware that "it's okay" to have the version that pleases you more than the version that you think pleases others

Her new appearance reflects her experience, the complete wish is on its way but now with a much better appearance and a "better version of herself" as she herself said to Ash at the end of XYZ

She is no longer doing things for her mother or external expectations but is walking the path she chose and doing what she always dreamed of.

Just like all the themes of the genre that Akane Tendo helped create I like how Akemi Omode uses the elements of Ramma here and whoever wrote episode 105, who is unknown to me, also did a spectacular job overall in bringing the main aspect of her character out 🩵

This is not about the blue ribbon I will not mention it here it is a symbology for another post

Thank you for reading again.

[runawaycarouselhorse]

Our pure-hearted, all-loving hero... he can be a little brat (especially back in OS/early in his journey, when he was much more of a hot-blooded boy hero), but his heart's worth its weight in solid gold and he grows into such a kind, patient character with strong ideals, which is why Hero of Ideals suits him best (even the movie manga opted to adapt that version of the movie, rather than the one where Ash is Hero of Truth, and expanded on it!)

[I hope you have "long post" and "image heavy" muted if you need to, because this post's a doozy and given tumblr, if my blog's ever deleted, posts with read mores will be rendered inaccessible forever, so I don't like to make them!]

A lot of people complained about how young Ash looked in BW! (and complained even more about Sun & Moon's very divisive art style... and we wound up seeing great growth for his love of a whole region, and achieved a goal integral to achieving his dreams), but from the first episode of BW!, my first impression was of how mature and calm Ash is with Iris and Trip in regards to their initially abrasive and varingly aloof personalities.

Iris was friendlier and more excitable, more childlike, but Ash took her barbs in stride and patiently waited for her to open up about her dreams (she keeps it secret in the first episode, using that cute, childish word "naisho" instead of saying it's a secret "himitsu"--the same childish word she uses when asked about what Kairyuu/Dragonite told her in their reunion episode) and background (we don't know she ran away from the academy or what her hometown was like until season 2!)

The way Ash handled Tory (who was a traumatized, younger child--and Ash wanted to fight him at first, before understanding him!), Lucario (also traumatized, insulted Ash and Pikachu's bond--Ash fought him and fell off a hill, wrestling with him, before he saw Lucario's memory of being "abandoned" and broke down in tears, apologizing for what he said when he didn't know anything...), Chimchar (a traumatized Pokemon, Ash was patient, kind, and loving to him, even when he lashed out while out of control due to Blaze, which he previously could only use to save his life...), etc., is very different from how he handled Iris (who was bullied subtly by being completely ostracized, no one would sit or eat or play with her at the academy, she was so depressed, she stopped eating--this is canon and not lingered on, but she plainly says it and that her dorm mother making her food that would remind her of home, just berries skewered on a stick, "saved her") and even Trip.

(By the way, Ash apologizing to Lucario, in tears of regret over what he said to Lucario when he didn't understand him is when I first started to truly love and respect Ash's character and growth! Before that, I really was only a big fan of the TRio.)

By contrast to those rockier beginnings with other kids, Ash was patient and encouraging with Trip, even while Trip purposefully kept him and everyone else (even his Pokemon who loved him, as Alder said...) at bay and rejected all his attempts at friendship, before he got the answers he needed from Alder and slowly stopped shutting others out. He had every right to lash out at Trip for making fun of him, but kept trying to befriend him and showed interest in his journey and growth.

(Trip was also his youngest main rival at that point, even if he is a very book-smart child prodigy type who was an excellent battler from the start, he still fell apart in front of unexpected, unorthodox techniques like Bell/Bianca and Satoshi/Ash's out-of-the-box strategies.)

Naturally, there's also his very patient and encouraging bond with Lillie, who also had her trauma-induced fear of Pokemon (much like Tory!) and dissociative amnesia, the early loss of her father in infancy, and the distance between her and her mother (too wrapped-up in work and her obsession with Ultra Beasts to notice her own child's trauma and falling behind her peers...) to overcome, but the focus of this post is BW! I already write a lot about Lillie, she's another favourite of mine. <3

It's worth noting, too, that Pikachu was Ash's first "problem Pokemon"... even if it's usually the Fire types who are traumatized, Pikachu has abandonment issues like Chimchar and Tepig did. Pikachu famously hates being inside a pokeball and Ash always repesects this boundary and becomes very, very upset in XY when he believed Pikachu was forced into a pokeball... the pokeball factory episode was, otherwise, a very light-hearted episode, but Pikachu's boundaries and possible trauma is taken seriously.

This scene mirrors a similar breakdown Alain has when he finds out all he's done, under the impression he was protecting his loved ones, was aiding Lysandre's genocidal plans... both smash their fists into hard surfaces, blaming themselves for failing to protect loved ones.

In a very early Kanto episode, Sparks Fly for Magnemite, we learn Pikachu has abandonment issues so bad, he doesn't want to be separated from Ash for even an overnight stay in the Pokemon Center. It seems Pikachu (fortunately) quickly become much more secure in his bond with Ash and no longer fears being separated for medical treatment, but this is very, very sad and telling!

Although we never delve very deeply into that for most of the series... (an early magazine scan has Ookido-hakase/Professor Oak theorize Pikachu's previous trainer abandoned it), we were finally given some answers late in series!

In the AU movie, Pikachu says* his reason for not going into the pokeball: "It's because I always want to be with you." ;O;

... unless this is a dream or hallucination, given Ash is on the verge of unconsciousness when it happens--but if we really want to believe it happened, maybe his latent Aura post-cognition abailities kicked in and he understood Pikachu's feelings, like when Victini slept in his lap, crying, and Ash saw Victini's dream of his past.

As for the main series canon, in the first episode of Pocket Monsters 2019 (Pokemon Journeys), we learn Ash's Pikachu was a lone, possibly orphaned, Pichu, who was briefly raised by a Kangaskhan, carried in her pouch with her child, until he grew too heavy and quietly left at night (without saying goodbye) to live by his own strength, evolving into Pikachu as he did so.

If Lusamine not taking Lillie's (because they're irrational or not logical) feelings seriously gave her a complex where she always needed to claim her stances are "logical" even when they're based in emotion... I wonder what it tells us that "child prodigy" Trip defaulting to blaming his loss to Alder on him doing something wrong or being inherently lacking ("What did I do wrong? What do I lack?"), because he doesn't ever consider a simple difference in experience is all it is... that Alder's many years of wisdom and Pokemon training give him an advantage over rookie trainer Trip, who's shown to be averse to being called a "child" (Iris ropes him into battling Ash twice by calling him a kid), because he always has to prove he's an adult. He thinks there's something inherently "lacking" in him or "wrong" about his method if he doesn't achieve.

All of that is canon, but if you further analyze his character, Trip has a superiority complex, which is very often a defense mechanism to mask feelings of inferiority. He canonically places a lot of worth in the image he projects and constantly puts down others. Add that to being a child prodigy and his preoccupation with proving he's an adult (but doesn't bat an eyelid at someone calling him "unjust" for his violent methods in the Venipede episode, like he's already accepted being a terrible person, because he thinks striving for peace like idealistic Ash is "naive"--Trip has a very cynical view of adults, yet thinks of himself as such...)

Trip only cares to be seen as strong and mature, not good (he's not even surprised to be called bad, he's already accepted it, he doesn't care), and if he fails, he blames his lack of knowledge or his inherent nature as lacking.

Because his self-worth is in being a genius and being better than the rest, so he seeks outside validation, namely Alder's, who Trip behaves so jealously about, Alder canonically compares him to a fickle-hearted woman (well, he messes up the phrase 'Onna-gokoro to haru no sora.' "A woman's heart is as fickle as the sky of spring" because he was hitting on Junsa-san/Officer Jenny earlier, so he says "fickle as Junsa-san"... Freudian slip. ^^;;;;)

Trip, when asked what he was battling for, what he wanted to prove... he said it was to prove his strength to Alder.

That's all he wanted! To prove his strength and be acknowledged by his hero. Alder even asks him if he likes him. Adeku frankly asks it in the Japanese version, but the dub dances around with "do you have any admiration for a man such as myself"--which Trip doesn't answer verbally, although he really doesn't have to, because the scene makes it clear and is a lens that clarifies all his past behaviour.

That's all Trip wants: love and acknowledgement. Which he believed he could only get by becoming stronger, smarter, and more mature as fast as possible, likely taking Alder's to be some stronger and grow up quickly too literally, as head animator Iwane said, Shootie was just "a little too grown-up."

It takes a long, long time for Trip to unlearn prioritizing battles over anything else and to embrace childhood (which hey, is one of the main themes of BW!), because it's a precious time which we can never return to... so, Alder's current idealogy is to enjoy life, make friends, love Pokemon, and not dwell on the past. Ash's approach to being a Pokemon Champion and Master is the same.

Alder's introductory episode made it very clear he and Ash are very, very similar characters... and we see this again in Journeys, in the kind of advice Champion Ash gives younger kids. Ash and Alder have a similar wisdom they'd like to impart, I know, it's funny calling Ash wise, but he has high emotional intelligence and is incredibly wise in that respect for his age... it took Alder many, many long years to arrive at the same conclusion Ash reached.

Ash's Japanese name, Satoshi, means "Wisdom." (Another cute detail: Ash's little brother, Lei, whose Hawaiian name means a "Garland of Flowers-- in Japanese, would be pronounced as Rei, which also means "Wisdom." Lei likely has a name chosen to have meaning in both Hawaiian and Japanese. ^^)

Bonus shout-out to Ash, Iris, and Cilan all protecting Keldeo until he finds the courage to face his fears, correct his mistakes, and save his friends...

Ash is a very good friend, AG, DP, and BW! are all part of his development into the kinder character he became today. Some people might miss how rude he was to his friends in OS, but he can still playfully dish it out, he's just calmer and more sure of himself, so less likely to sweat the small stuff and recognizes when someone, whether Pokemon or trainer, just needs time and patience.

[bluephoric]

ridiculously long list of larry johnson hcs because fuck you he doesnt get enough love

Tw for depressing ass shit

- larry is a tired clumsy airhead, and as a result he always has SOMETHING spilled, wiped, or drawn on his clothes.

- undiagnosed adhd, and probably a few other things

- both him and sal collect bottlecaps, they like to make pins out of cool ones they find, often trading them like pokemon cards. they have multiple matching friendship ones. on common ones though, he likes to flatten and paint.

- larry's mental health generally sucks, but when things get really bad he stops caring about his physical safety, often pulling some reckless shit. even when he gets hurt from it, he doesnt seem to mind. Times like these kinda scare him, and he tries to avoid falling into them.

- despite seemingly "not caring about anything" (as he puts it) during these episodes, he's still fiercely protective of his friends and tries to be gentle with them, both physically and emotionally.

- callused hands, fingers yellowed from smoking.

- big fan of gas stations when he's high, practically raids that shit. one of his nicknames is "stoner jesus"

- he's openly bisexual and flirts with random people for fun. its usually something light. dorky pickup lines, stupid puns.. he Never expects it to be shot back at him but on the rare occasion it happens, he turns into a giggling mess.

- he actually pissed off travis even worse a few times with it, I could go into it further but this isnt a larvis post so i'll spare you all. For now.

- his favorite horror movies are the funny ones

- he isnt much of a drinker, mostly around holidays and just to get a little buzzed. spiked eggnog and fireball are his go-to's. Drunk christmas karaoke is one of his favorite things (he's constantly giving sal secondhand embarrassment). 2 words, mariah carrey.

- For awhile he genuinely tried to be a good student but because he was so far behind and his undiagnosed adhd, the teachers started to demonize him. Eventually he realized it didnt matter how hard he tried, so he just gave up. The only subject he likes is art, so that's where he focuses all his energy and actually tries.

- skips school sometimes but lisa tends to give him hell for it so he tries not to do it too often, mostly just skips certain classes if hes really not feeling it.

- almost always comes to school high

- his room is such a mess. sal tries to help him with it but he has similar struggles. whenever ash or todd come over, it becomes a group effort and shit gets done rather quickly. luckily no biohazards, so its not like his room really needs a DEEP clean but still. its nice.

- larry fucking LOVES jack black movies, also stupid stoner movies.

- Loves the arcade too, You'd think his favorite would be guitar hero, but that's more for sal. his favorite is mortal combat or those car racing games that you sit in with the steering wheel.

- larry cant cook for shit, hes always burning something, it always turns out gross and inedible. unless he's stoned, in which case he magically turns into a michelin star chef. weird ass combinations, but it always turns out really good.

- despite being shit at cooking, he still tries to help his mom with it, even though he mostly ends up just being in the way and she eventually shoos him out of the kitchen

- he smells super musky, with cheap cologne and the faint scent of weed

- when he was really little, he had a dinosaur onsie that he would wear everywhere, very rarely taking it off until it started to get too tight. he was beyond devastated when he realized he grew out of it, lisa had to pry it away from him in fear that he would accidentally destroy it. She keeps it in her closet collecting dust. Its one of the few things she kept from before jim disappeared. despite it bringing up memories of what things used to be like before he "left", she couldnt bear to throw it out.

- sometimes when larry needs comfort, he sneaks into her room and steals it temporarily. on sleepless nights, he zips it over his pillows as a makeshift pillowcase, its one of the few things that help him relax. It's always put back in place by the next morning. Lisa has no idea, and he's far too embarrassed about it to say anything to her.

- the only person who knows about this is sal because of their sleepovers. One night He was high as balls and got paranoid, when he tried to sleep it off the fear was just too much so away he crept, into lisa's room. Of course he made sal come with him, he sure as shit wasnt going alone.

- when questioned about it, larry refused to answer and so sal let it go figuring he would tell him when he was ready.

- Larry Harbors an obscene amount of guilt. struggles with sh off and on, tries not to relapse unless things get really unbearable. to prevent this, him and the SF gang (primarily ash) regularly doodle and sometimes paint on the places he's prone to harm.

- when he can feel himself slipping into an episode, larry makes it a point to braid his hair so it won't get matted. tries to brush it and rebraid it at least once a week, but often struggles to find the energy and lets it sit in for longer. Not to mention, a lot of the times he stops showering which makes it even harder to braid because of the greasiness.

- has given himself a few amateur stick and pokes. They look like shit, and he knows it but he's still very proud of them.

- the ink he uses for it fades pretty fast

- he's also tried to give himself piercings, but always fucks it up so he takes them out and slaps a bandaid over it

- collects different kinds of flavored chapstick, takes a bite out of them sometimes when he thinks no one is looking (ofc sal has caught him a few times but has never said anything)

- after he first met megan, he was scared shitless. slept with the lights on for the next few weeks and refused to shut the door when going to the bathroom, insisting to his mom on keeping the shower curtain open at all times (he tried to act chill about it around sal and it kinda worked. kinda.) after awhile he eventually calmed down but still finds himself getting really nervous whenever him and sal talk to a ghost, though he would never admit it.

- has a picture of his dad in a locket but rarely wears it because he's afraid he'll accidentally break it. always keeps it with him though, usually in his pocket, holding it as he walks.

- Despite his general demeanor he's quite the gentleman, always holding doors open and really courteous towards women. Most people don't expect it just based on his appearance, but Lisa raised him right.

- also he's hot as fuck.

- we all know larry is a metalhead, but what kind of metal is his favorite? It generally depends on his mood but id say sludge, thrash, and doom.

- You're telling me this man, who is depressed as fuck and also a stoner wouldnt eat up some electric wizard? saint vitus? bitch, please. I know quite a few albums that would bring him to his knees.

- And I know I'm prolly gonna get hate for this but I notice when a lot of other people write about larry (AND sal), they tend to lean towards nu metal or just plain emo. And while I don't think either of them would mind it, The lyrics and vocals of Sanity's fall feels more reminiscent of death or black metal and given the fact that SF is his favorite band, I don't think he would listen to that kind of stuff, at least not on a regular basis. Ash on the other hand definitely would.

[ngray192]

CHAOS THEORY SEASON TWO IS OUT!!!! As you all expected, I watched it all in one sitting and wrote notes on everything! Under the cut is my train of thought and commentary on the season, and no, you will not be given context for anything that I wrote.

- omg I’ve been waiting all dayyyyy

- Raptor lady is gone, I wonder who the new villain is.

- I wonder if this is gonna tie into Dominion at all

- Boat!!

- Shoutout to Nick “Rocket” Rodriguez

- I’m sorry did they make a hammock in here????

- Only Sammy can make a shipping container into a home

- Yaz I love you

- Yasammyyyyyyy ugh they’re adorable

- I knew it was a baryonyx!!!

- Kenjis so sad

- Why is he throwing lettuce into the ocean?

- Like five minutes in and there’s so many small yasammy moments

- Ex-kon was hilarious, you guys just don’t get it

- LET HIM COPE

- Yaz and Kenji moment!!!!

- Therapist Yaz is my favorite

- I love her development and growth omg

- Hybrid Dino??

- Kenji Kon, stop leaving the container

- A storms brewing

- Why is there just an open crate of lettuce?

- Bro you’re wasting so much lettuce

- They were in Louisiana last season?

- How tf have you not been caught?

- The water animationnnn

- Oh shit

- Ben please don’t get shocked again

- Ngl I’d offer to help too

- Yaz and Kenji in their besties era

- BUMPYS EGG

- Is that a baryonyx?

- DID IT DIE???

- Two?!

- The ashes from the fire animation is wild

- Yes saves the Dino eggs

- Oh fuck this is kinda graphic I love it

- This gives the same vibes as the actual movies and I’m all for it

- Bro that parasarolaphus (I cannot spell) looks scary af

- Sammy running to Yaz for Yasammy, Ben running to Kenji?????

- Lets see a person die

- Aaaaah it’s the scene from the clip I saw!!!!

- Such a cool chase scene

- BUMPYS EGG

- KENJI STOP

- He didn’t help you, he saved your fucking life

- Are we gonna get a “Kenji is suicidal” arc???

- Tell me why I was actually worried? They’re not gonna kill Kenji

- Brotherss

- Those eggs should be scrambled wtf

- A lot of Yaz and Kenji moments I’m here for it

- Open up, PLEASE

- Oh shitttt

- He’s not gonna tell anyone, is he?

- THE MEMORIAL IM CRYING

- Solid first episode

Episode 2

- “marooned five”

- The light shining from the clouds??? Beautiful

- Ok, this is a valid “not telling the group the truth” plot line, he doesn’t wanna distract them and be wrong

- I’m sorry, who tf are you people??

- Wait is this small child gonna join the group??

- Please don’t be a big part of the show, I wanna focus on Camp Fam

- Are the dinosaurs protecting her? I love that

- What kinda Dino is that? Gallimimus? Struithominous?

- Did they change clothes or just take off their jackets?

- Omg they can’t split into 3 groups of 2 anymore

- Yasammy side mission!!!

- I love Kenji omg

- They’re such brothers, I love it

- Same old dino nerd

- Why are you not concerned that people are on your property?

- Why would you just tell her a large portion of your plan??

- I kinda want this lady to be evil

- Can we get a name for this girl soon?

- No she found the eggs!!!

- Why tf would you take it from the bush and leave it out in the open?

- Do you need service to play a video like that?

- Also you can def show the group just the thumbnail for the video and they’ll see her

- They’re so goofy, I love them.

- I was right, it is a gallimimus!!

- It’s like a dino-mill upriver

- Damnit, you guys just fucked up the balanced ecosystem here

- Cool ass dino omg

- The colors on herrrr

- Please don’t fall out of a tree

- The rice nooooo

- It’s a suchomimus

- Stop trying to fix things omg

- I’m sorry but I don’t care about the mom and daughter

- “Off-brand alligator”

- I love how Yasammy is usually Team Distraction

- Darius is so fast wtf

- Rock climber Kenji

- MOVE KENJI

- HES SO STUPID AND BEING SO DANGEROUS

- They are kicking that Suchomimus’s ass omg

- His voice is so much deeper than in CC

- Screenshot and show the rest of the group the picture of Brooklyn omfg

- Animata and Zayna

- SHOW THEM

- SHOW THEMMMMMM

- UGH

- I hate you

- Captain Kenji!!

- Ngl this season isn’t as interesting as season 1, but hopefully it’ll get better

Episode 3

- This episode is titled “Clever Girl 86”

- Brooklyn!!!

- And freshly amputated damn

- YOU “stitched her up” AT HOME???

- Aww a compy lost its foot?

- I love when people in shows have realistic reactions

- She drove a motorcycle??

- Video call!!

- I don’t like that jacket

- Clevergirl86 is someone from Dark Jurassic, maybe Ronnie??

- Ok, so this is the day they broke up?

- I should’ve finished rewatching it he first season

- Oh is it love confession time?

- He’s such a bad liar

- No, it’s different with Ben because they’re IN love

- Girl don’t say “unless…”

- Yikes

- I love how you can see the reflections on screens, it’s so cool

- Account was hacked???

- It doesn’t look like enough of her arm is gone

- Is this a full Brooklyn episode? It’s only episode 3

- Ronnie is definitely a lesbian

- Alcohol will take the edge off, let’s get hammered

- I hate the pixie cut, I’m sorry

- Awww Gordon

- OVER 60??

- Her dads are in town for the funeral???

- This is so sad

- She still acts like Brooklyn

- Wow, never mind a lot of her arm is gone

- Kill the DPW guy

- Stab him, you’re dead you can’t be put on trial for murder

- I refuse to believe Raptor Lady speaks to people on the phone

- Ok, but staying dead was kind smart

Episode 4

- the dino liberators are here

- He’s trying to be Kenji and I don’t like it

- Why wear masks if you’re just gonna take them off and use your real names?

- A trust fund? Earnest is fr just Kenji but worse and mixed with a little bit of Dave

- Syd?

- The animation is gorgeous

- OUTFIT CHANGES???

- Her username is Esther Stone

- Nosey ass kid

- Yaz looks so cute!!!

- Do not take the child with you

- Please tell us what happened with Sammy’s family

- Nooooo don’t go with the group

- They all look like their faces and bodies changed when they changed clothes

- Ok, she’s still in America

- Are they gonna kill them???

- THEY TOOK GEBA

- Why tf is Kenji wearing those shoes?

- THEY KNOCKED HIM TF OUT

- The camera shaking as the dinos run out? I love it

- She’s a pretty good actress

- God I fucking hate this guy

- Why are the dinosaurs so sad?

- I don’t care about this child and her dinosaurs

- UHGHGHRHGGHHHHH I DONT WANT THIS CHILD HERE. IT IS A CAMP FAM SHOW

- Why is he being a dick all of a sudden?

- Dubai?

- She’s just like Ben dropping her phone in the water

Episode 5

- such a pretty show omg

- Sammy is such mom-material

- She’s 14???

- They’re back to their old outfits, sigh

- Why did they split up Darius, Sammy, Zayna and Kenji, Yaz, and Ben?

- Same old Ben

- Girl, the six of you lived together on an island for six months, privacy does NOT exist with this group

- Omg do you think it’s the girl from JW Dominion?

- “Damning”

- THE GADDY, DADDYS GADDY FROM SEASON 3

- How many close call sneaking scenes are we gonna have?

- Is it the girl from Dominion?

- Stop being weird about her missing limb??

- There’s no way Ben has cell service rn

- Not him using Yasminas head to get around the boat

- I love his little dino imitations

- This reminds me of JWCC season 1 episode 6 or 7 with the kayaks

- Ok, yeah it is the raptor girl from JW Dominion

- All around the globe?

- Oh fuck

- Come on, Sammy get the gun!

- KENJI WTF

- STOP

- The way her bangs move when she shakes her head, I love her

- Did the raptor press the elevators buttons what

- She’s kinda bad at painting

- Oh shitttt

- Is she the one hunting the kids?

- This penthouse chase scene is good

- Girl is not good at running from dinos

- The way she immediately puts the same arm up is a nice detail

- Girl you are not cut out for being on this journey with this group

- They were taking all the risks on those islands

- I’m not really getting anything marked on my bingo card

- TELL THEM

Episode 6

- what is in the water? Cause i doubt it’s the mossasaurus

- Awww a hippo

- Wait hippos are crazy dangerous

- Reminds me of the paras during the kayak episode in CC Season 1

- Zayna def should’ve known hippos are dangerous af

- “Dirtbag”

- You’re wasting all your food

- Throw the mangoes further omg

- KENJIN KON YOU ARE SO STUPID

- The details in the animationnnnnnughhgugggh

- Ben’s lips look so chapped omg

- I hate this child

- A lot of fire this season

- I don’t think she’s the Broker, I think there’s someone bigger

- Sammy needs to become a mom

- YOU SHOULD NOT HAVE CELL SERVICE HERE

- Oumars dead babe

- She’s vegetarian??

- OMG

- IS THAT A DEAD BODY????

- WTF

- They’re all so stressed out

- You’re gonna make her anxiety come back, let her breathe

- Brooklyn, wtf are you doing?

- Kill her

- Sucho number 2

- KENJI

- Don’t hide Yaz wtf

- Oh fuck that had to hurt

- THEYRE GONNA LEAVE HER BEHIND

- Lame, should’ve killed her

- They were 13 on the island?

- I guess she is the broker?

- Ok, girl nobody believes you

- Don’t give her the laser pointer

- IS HIS SHOULDER DISLOCATED

- BRO WTF

- They never would’ve shown half of this shit in JWCC

- YES NOW TURN BACK AND GET YAZ

- Oh she’s knocked tf out

Episode 7

- only a few more left

- Give her a break omg shits always happening to her

- Why is it taking so long for them to get back to her??

- … I guess the Sucho won

- I feel like the boats are much faster than going on foot?

- Also the current is not that strong

- Damn Sammy’s kinda scary when she’s worried about her wife

- Fuck this Sucho fr

- I wish we got more Ben and Darius this season, even just as friends

- Why are Kenji and Ben being so awkward??

- Darius does NOT know how to talk to children but he’s trying so hard

- Once again, the animation is gorgeous

- I love him

- I don’t like Zayna

- She’s real af for that though

- Yaz has a head injury and is climbing up trees rn, girlboss

- OH SHIT

- That lowkey scared me

- LEAVE HER ALONE

- THAT KICK OMG

- Girl is struggling

- I love a good Yaz-forward episode

- I love the way the eyes shine when the flashlights are on them

- Awww Kenji

- Benji?

- Aww Darius protecting Zayna

- “Oh jeez, oh jeez, oh jeez” I love him

- They are just beating the shit out of the local wildlife and I love it

- LIONS?!?

- This girl does not know everything omg

- Water and land are dangerous, you would’ve had problems either way

- Give her a break omfg

- IT CAN SWIM?!

- Yaz’s plot armor is absurd

- She needs to get back to her girlfriend, she is cold, wet, tired, injured

- You have paddles?? At least you should

- What dino is this?

- The dino fights are crazy this season

- You’re doing all of this in sandals??

- … at least you don’t have to worry about the Sucho anymore

- KENJI YOU RUINED THE MOMENT

- “My girl” STOPPPPP

- They’re so in love

- ITS DAYTIME???

- Probably my favorite episode so far

Episode 8

- this is 2 parter??

- I love how they all just know how to steer a boat???

- Awww Kenji protecting Yaz

- I love Sammy

- How tf can they hear a generator that far away??

- YES LEAVE HER BEHIND

- Girl

- Kenji is the older brother ever

- Oh shit a dino

- The chase scenes are good this season

- Kenji, stop IT

- Finally

- This is so sad

- Yasmina “not a hugger” Fadoula

- They’re so in sync

- Monolophasaurs?

- Benji are probably thriving rn be fr

- I love Ben

- Sammy’s so dorky I love it

- Oh my gosh

- Baby dino factory

- I hate Zayna, like I know she’s a kid but she’s annoying (I’m 17, I’m allowed to dislike children)

- Goodbye captain lang, damn

- Yasammy have not kissed ONCE this season (maybe they have, I’m not sure)

- They all take care of Zayna and that’s cute

- Yaz holding Sammy like that is adorable

- DO NOT SPLIT UP

- Why is Zayna the only person in this show with pierced ears?

- They should form a cheerleading team the way they’re lifting her

- Is this a dino fighting arena?

- IT HAS NO EYES

- This scene is actually so interesting

- FUCKING IDIOT GIRL

- Darius is the fucking king of sliding through small gaps

- Team Distraction for the win

- That is a child, why do you care if she thinks you’re cool or not??

- BRO SHOULD NOT BE ALIVE AFTER THAT FALL

- Kenjis still wearing those ugly ass shoes

- I love Ben

- WHY DID SHE JUST WALK IN THERE???

- SHE TOOK THE EGGS

- That was a good episode

Episode 9

- part 2

- That phone is huge

- Why are you having the one-armed girl drive?

- You shouldn’t trust her

- Dr. Sarr?

- Rewrite the genetic code??

- They’re still referred to as kids and I love it

- I do like episodes where I get to piece together a timeline

- What is this fucking music in the background?

- Oh shit she was working the crate and shit

- Seeing this all from her pov is kinda boring

- I was lowkey hoping for a more dramatic reveal

- I actually like how dark this season is and how every bad guy character is bad

- Oh my gosh

- Damnit Brooklyn you should’ve let her fall

- I don’t really like that we keep repeating the same scenes, but only slightly different

- It’s fine to split the Fam up like this, but we need to stop focusing on Brooklyn, I wanna go back to Ben and Kenji or Yasammy and Darius, split it up like we did in CC

Episode 10

- here we go, final episode

- Kenji needed that

- He def needed to release that anger

- I think we need to let Kenji kill someone

- Wtf how is he still alive?

- Baryonyxes are so cool

- Awww the dinosaurs are bonding

- It’s like the scene with the raptors and the hybrid in Jurassic Park 2 or 3

- I’m too invested to write notes lmao

- Those night vision sunglasses are kinda cool

- Fuck that kinda scared me

- Where is Zaynas dad?

- This season is lowkey scary

- How does her phone still have power? It’s been like 4 days

- Someone should’ve brought a gun

- They cannot hear you saying “I’m coming” in a normal volume be fr

- Ben and Kenji have been alone together way too much to not kiss

- Oh, there’s Zaynas dad

- WHERE ARE KENJI AND BEN

- Where did that car come from??

- Bro all of a sudden went into Tokyo Drift mode

- Kentrosaurus?

- Who let Kenji drive??

- There’s still so much to wrap up

- Biosyn??

- Wait does this take place before Dominion then?

- Ok, but BUMPYS EGG IS STILL IN THERE

- She def took bumpys egg out

- See? I know everything

- Oh, wait that’s it??

- I have mixed feelings.

[aziraphales-library]

I know many of the fics post season 2 will be Aziraphale rejecting Heaven and leaving with Crowley, but are there fics of Crowley accepting Aziraphale (reluctantly or not) and going to Heaven with him? :)

Here are some where Crowley goes to heaven...

I'll Come With You by MikkMeek (G)

“I’ll come.” Aziraphale stilled, eyes widening and mouth stuck open. “What?” It was barely a whisper, but Crowley heard it loud and clear. He heard the mixture of confusion and relief mixed into Aziraphale’s tone as if he was unsure of what Crowley was agreeing to. “I’ll come with you.” A lump formed in Crowley’s throat as he forced the words out of himself. “To heaven.” - Or: Crowley goes to heaven with Aziraphale.

if we can’t find where we belong (we’ll have to make it on our own) by Mayverix (T)

It took Crowley all of five minutes to direct the Bentley into an impossibly tight and extremely illegal U-turn. Because Aziraphale had just done something, and Aziraphale wouldn’t do that. Not anymore. Once, maybe, he would have chosen Heaven over everything, but this Aziraphale had walked Crowley’s body into Hell and asked for a rubber duck. This Aziraphale had almost shot the antichrist. This Aziraphale didn’t want to go back to Heaven, which Crowley knew because he’d told him so. —— Immediately following season 2 episode 6, Crowley goes after Aziraphale.

Put me back in it by imnotcryingipromise (G)

Crowley concedes to Aziraphale's wishes and joins him in heaven. The kiss never happens. In a heated argument about duty, Crowley reveals the real reason he chose to follow the angel. The kindling of their romance proves to have devastating consequences. *** "I would do it again, Crowley.”

a painted veil (for all the stars in the sky) by pantheralupus (T)

Red hair, combed back and held by an alice band. A snake wrought not in ash, but in gold, curled just by the ear. A small, hesitant smile. Warm brown eyes. Aziraphale's breath caught in his throat, hardly daring to believe what he was seeing. "Hello, angel," whispered Crowley.

After returning to Heaven, Aziraphale begins to regret his decision to leave Crowley. Then to his surprise, Crowley rejoins him. But all is not as it seems…

Pure of Heart by syrupfactory (M)

Aziraphale had watched Crowley walk away, watched the door close behind him. All that remained was the peculiar tingle lingering on Aziraphale’s lips. But then, Crowley came back inside. What had changed his mind? Aziraphale never got the chance to ask. Moments later, the two of them were on the elevator with the Metatron. Aziraphale remembered it clearly as the last time he was truly happy. Canon divergence where Crowley agreed to return to Heaven with Aziraphale, only for Crowley's memory to be wiped immediately as part of his "second chance" at being an angel.

Factory Settings by Anonymous (T)

Crowley gets reinstated as an angel.

- Mod D