#as you can see i havent read a book in quite a while

[heliads]

If requests are still open :) Something for dead poets society, just sth with the gang having a good time, maybe trying to stage a play in the woods? Tbh just a everyone lives and is happy AU with fluff and winter and hot tea! (while I love this book I havent read it in a very long time...)

ok consider an everyone lives au but they are not 100% happy. (i am incapable of not writing angst my apologies) also this is movie dead poets society not book because i have not yet read the books whoops. hope you enjoy xoxo

'and it's not tonight' - dead poets society

masterlist

Todd Anderson is looking out the window at a gray, blustery morning, when they ask him if he’s going to be alright. It wasn’t quite certain before then. It’s not quite certain now, either, even after he answers.

“Of course,” he says somewhat unconvincingly, “Why do you ask?”

Behind him, Charlie Dalton raises a dubious brow. For once in his life, he’s holding himself back, but the situation requires discretion, and who is he to mess up at a time like this? He’s already been warned about treating Todd like a glass doll rather than a paper mache target, but even Charlie can tell that now is the time to pull a few punches. The hollows under his friend’s eyes are far darker than they were a couple of months ago. He wears unease like a well-traveled coat, thin at the elbows and rubbed raw at the seams.

“Look at yourself,” Charlie answers at last, “You’re exhaustion walking. And don’t tell me otherwise, I’ve got eyes.”

“I should hope so,” Todd remarks, and permits himself a small curl of his lips up into a half-smile. Half-smiles are good, though. Almost there to the real thing. So he’ll tell himself, at least.

Even a half-smile can let Charlie know that he’s alright. The other boy breaks into a well-intentioned snorting laugh. “Hey, ask any girl in town and they’ll tell you I’ve got beautiful ones. ‘Sides, Anderson, you know everything’s alright. The stuff with Neil was cleared over, right? He came back.”

“He came back,” Todd repeats somewhat weakly.

“Yeah, yeah, he came back,” Charlie confirms, walking over to clap his friend on the shoulder, shaking him a little bit just to mess with him but mainly to get his affections across. “He’s a little more tired than he used to be, and we’re all plenty scared from what could have happened, but overall we’re glad to see him again. His parents realized they messed up in the nick of time, and even if they wanted him under watch for a little bit, he’s back and we’re back and everything’s alright. Capiche?” He asks dramatically, wiggling his eyebrows for a bit of flair.

“Since when are you Italian?” Todd asks doubtfully.

“Since the situation requires it,” Charlie answers him, and slings an arm around the boy’s bony frame. “Come on now. The snow’s cleared up, and even if all that does is remind us how little grass grows on our campus, it means we can go into the woods again. I’ve been talking to the boys and we all agree that it’s time to dust off our finesse with literature. What do you say, Todd? You up for another rousing poetic exchange tonight?”

Todd jerks his head up and down in a hasty agreement. “Yeah. Neill’ be there?”

“Yeah, and me, and Knoxie, and everyone else you forgot to mention,” Charlie says in a tone of mock outrage. “God, you live with the guy, don’t you? Can’t you spare some excitement for the rest of us, too?”

Todd rolls his eyes, and finds the grace to elbow Charlie in the ribs. “Spare me the self-indulgence, Dalton. I’m glad to see all of you.”

“Don’t I know it,” Charlie affirms. “It’s been a while since we were all together, yeah?”

Todd blows out a low breath as they walk back towards the halls. It has been a long time, or it felt that way, at least. After the– after the incident after the play, in which Neil was found in his father’s study with a gun in his hands about to blow the trigger, it was decided that all of the pupils of Welton Academy would go home for a short period of time to clear their heads and come back ready to face the end of term. 

Mainly, Todd thinks it was so rumors couldn’t spread about just what happened with Neil Perry to take him out of school, and he’s glad for it. Neil doesn’t deserve to have everyone whispering about what happened to make him decide that the best thing for his life was to end it. Neil deserves the world, and none of them could give it to him.

That was the worst part of it all, Todd decides. The guilt, how it wrapped around him in wires as strong as the heaviest chains of iron. He couldn’t escape it. If he was really Neil’s friend, he would have known. If he was really Neil’s friend, Todd could have stopped him. If he was really Neil’s friend, Todd wouldn’t have found out about the attempt the next morning, quietly awoken from drowsy sleep by a Charlie Dalton with eyes like a stricken soldier as he lurchingly informed Todd that Neill Perry had tried to kill himself the night before. And none of them had known. And when his father had taken the gun away, Neil fought and screamed for it, worse than he did when he tried to convince his parents that he wanted to act, louder than he protested that he would be sent away to military school.

And then they were alone. At home. The worst place for boys to be. Should you grieve the friend who is not dead? Do you call each other on the phone, and ask if you have been playing any sporting games with other boys your age, or if you have given any thought to the fact that your friend might not have wanted to die if you had praised him more in class, or clapped louder when he performed, or said something– anything– to this beautiful, brittle boy?

They don’t say any of that. They think it quite loudly, but unspoken thoughts do not travel well over the telephone. The flittering ghosts of would-be words tend to get lodged in the coils of wire from receiver to housing, across the street and over the miles of terrain until they reach the abode of the boy on the end, who also has a lot to say but won’t. And then they both stay silent. And they both know exactly what the other wanted to say anyway. That is how friendship works.

They came back, though. Welton sent out a series of letters to usher back the pupils, even had its secretaries working overtime to call the people who never seem to answer their mail. There was another rush of cars and luggage to the dorms, and then they were settled in again. Todd had wondered if he might be assigned another roommate– anyone other than Cameron, God, but preferably Neil still– and then the door had opened quietly and Neil was there again, trying for a brave smile, and saying, “Todd?” in a voice that had once rung pure and true through a theater that loved him.

Todd loves him for it. He’d embraced Neill with open arms, felt the air punch out of his lungs in one strike, but it came back. He came back. They were alright again, sort of. They might be alright in time, but time is what they have.

Now they’ve all been waiting for the snow to melt, and treading on thin ice around topics they don’t dare broach. Neil has been a good sport, never making them feel awkward for wanting to treat him like a china doll. He was good before, too, though, and– It gets hard to tell sometimes, that’s all. Hard to tell when he genuinely is unbothered and when he’s superbly good at pretending otherwise. They stick to safer subjects anyway.

At last, though, the ground is firm, the weather not terrible, and Charlie’s gone and rallied the troops for a night out there. At first, Todd’s first instinct is to panic. They aren’t supposed to be having any more meetings of the Dead Poets Society, not since Keating was the scapegoat for all the trouble and everyone cracked down on what makes a good boy want to escape, but over time he realizes that it’ll be alright. Some things are worth the risk. Making Neil smile again is one of them.

They meet at midnight. Todd sits awake with bated breath, even though the act by itself isn’t even all that unusual. They’re teenage boys. Staying up until the moon hangs high and lofty in the sky is expected, not uncommon. Still, a delicious shiver of inherent wrongdoing whispers down his spine when Neil walks slowly into the center of their shared dorm room and says quietly, reverently, “It’s time.”

As if the others had been waiting upon that very proclamation, the remaining boys peer out into the hall immediately after Neil and Todd silently close their door behind them. Their eyes meet with shared secrecy, shared triumph, and they make their way down the wooden stairs and out into the bristling chill of night. The stars are out tonight. We are all out tonight.

They all start heading out into the woods. Charlie takes off like a flash at the end of a matchstick, hurtling at a runner’s sprint across the hills, and the others follow him at varying speeds. Todd begins walking at a normal clip until it occurs to him that he doesn’t see enough heads bobbing around him and he turns to see Neil hesitating by the door.

They lock eyes, and Todd sees a whole host of things swimming in brown irises, fear and apprehension and a sick sort of guilt that makes Todd’s stomach squirm in sympathy. He gives Neil one last moment over the threshold, then jerks his head towards the others, putting a little faux arrogance into the gesture in the hopes that an actor might appreciate an act in someone else and remember what it is like to trust oneself again.

Neil accepts the move and grins, his teeth flashing in the moonlight. “I’ll race you to the caves,” he calls, and begins to run, his footsteps sure and strong.

Todd stares after him, an astronomer watching his first comet, then takes off after him. The grass is dry and quick under his feet, spread out under each footstep like the wake of a speedboat. The wind, already coarse, pulls at Todd’s skin, his hair, his clothes, but not even the strongest gusts could keep him down. Somehow, he’s already to the edge of the forest, and he lets out a loud, delighted whoop. A barbaric yawp, if you will. Somewhere in the back of Todd’s mind, a dark-haired man in a comfortable brown sweater smiles indulgently, and chalks up another small victory to the wonders of poetry.

The second his war cry leaves Todd’s throat, the other boys swarm him like moths to a flame. Someone claps a hand over his mouth, and around him, laughs echo into the crunching of leaves underfoot. 

“Don’t be so loud, you’ll get the professors on us in no time,” someone admonishes, but then a different boy cuts in, “Don’t be stupid, we’re far enough out that we can all be shouting,” and Todd’s punishment is lifted and he can yell once more. His defender– Neil, it must be, no one else can make their voice ring with glory like that in just a few words– joins in in the triumphant calls, and then they’re all shrieking up to the stars above, here we are, not boys and not men, bold enough to scream and young enough to never listen.

Todd thinks, as they run through the forest, that it’s been a while since he let himself go free. He hasn’t listened to his mind in a long time, hasn’t let the words roll around in his brain, loose marbles of similes and paraphrased poems. His musings are dusty, dark things most of the time, but sometimes the light catches them just right and they glow like sapphires. He could write a thousand stanzas if he wanted to, right now, and everyone would listen.

The Dead Poets Society reaches the caves and a hush falls among the crowd. Slowly, they edge inside, eyes wide. The rock faces and crumbling caverns should be different, Todd thinks, something should mark the passage of time and all the awful things that have twisted their fates since the last time they sat together and thought of prose, but the stones still look as they did the last time they were here. The moss grows in familiar patterns, albeit a little thicker in certain patches now that it hasn’t been scuffed by boots in a month or so, but one of Charlie’s magazines that he forgot to take back with him turns up under some spiderwebs, and Todd’s favorite place to sit is still just as inviting. Maybe, then, the only thing that changed was them. Maybe that’s all that needs to happen.

“So?” Meeks asks, settling into a seat, “What are we doing tonight?”

“Poetry, duh,” Charlie answers him, rolling his eyes fondly. “We’re the Dead Poets Society. What else would we do, peruse our textbooks?”

This earns him a vengeful swat on the shoulder from Meeks, but even Charlie can admit that the question was fair. They’ve read plenty of poems, they’ve written a few, they’ve even gone off and run some improv limerick challenges, although Todd notes that they haven’t brought nearly enough alcohol for that tonight.

After a few moments’ thought, someone suggests a play. It might be Todd. Instantly, the idea is accepted, and roles are divided out. They’ll be doing Hamlet, since there are plenty of long sticks outside and everyone is quite fond of the idea of pretending to run each other through. Pitts is already practicing his death rattles, except he’s not very good at it, and it sounds more like he’s hacking up a lung or two.

Neil, though, is glowing at the idea, and even though they haven’t got any scripts so everyone is mostly just planning on paraphrasing the hell out of one of William Shakespeare’s finer works, Todd gets the idea that Neil has a few memorized soliloquies rattling around in his head already.

Good, then. They’ll enjoy tonight, and the next night they’re out here, and the one after that, too. It has been a very long winter, but Todd has caught his first glimpse of new spring, and he gets the feeling that warmer, sunnier days aren’t the impossibility they seemed a few weeks ago. The days are healing, and they will too. And so the Dead Poets come back to life.

requested by @reinekes-fox, i hope you enjoy!

dead poets society tag list: @faerieroyal

all tags list: @wordsarelife

[marieisnothere12]

kinda a hot take but i dont hate tsoa i dislike it more but i have a big ass beef with some fans (unfortunately which is what i see/interact with the most).

wow i yapped quite a lot

On the book itself, it accomplishes what its job was, write a heart-wrenching story and tell part of the story of the trojan war and not have ppl confused (or so ive heard). Miller tells us what led up to the trojan war simply and gives us enough info bc tsoa isnt abt the war—its obviously abt achilles and patroclus. I think thats why it shouldn’t be cast into the depths or tartarus, tsoa has its strengths. however, i definitely dont like how the women are written. Thetis and Deidemia are villainized but then again this is from patroclus’ pov and an adaptation so I wont bash Miller too much but still—dont like it. Briseis was ???? idk how i feel abt her. I just think her liking patroclus was iffy?? it gave main character privilege too much for me? does this even make sense?? phyrrus, well hes supposed to mirror achilles but yeah Miller didnt have too much leeway so i can forgive her on that but..my boy phyrrus…your nuance…

yeah ill give tsoa 3/5 i think its strength is that its accessible but nothing too special to elevate it up further. one big bonus it got ppl (me) it get back into greek mythology after forgetting abt it for a while so yeah and smth abt help queer teens feel better abt their sexuality which is great.

okay so the fans, acting like youre an expert on thr iliad after reading an adaptation is just. pls dont. adaptations have change. look if you watched epic the musical but havent read the odyssey i wont trust you bc jorge has made changes and so has miller. thr most notorious for me is that achilles and patroclus arent 1st cousins once removed (one of thr things that was in Troy 2004 funnily enough). i wont explain plot differences bc ✨ you probably read ot alr✨and its sanatized if that wasnt abundantly clear. theres naturally added scenes, some for the better and some for the worse (*cough* any scene with deidemia)

i am not too upset abt medic patroclus its an interesting change. i personally like a mix of warrior and medic patroclus but eh

i really wishes deidrmia wasnt a total bitch like jealous yet supportive patroclus?? i wanma see this internal conflict?? assuming patroclus has feelings for achilles atp. also i wouldve loved to see their friendship too like their not only lovers but best friends. and antilochus but alas a girl can only dream. this was a delusional hope paragraph

im like 90% sure twink patroxlus is bc of tsoa so :( man

in conclusion, i cant tell how i feel abt this book and its impact. its ???? theres lost nuance but its a single book and them again most patrochilles stuff is thr iliad and unfinished or fragmented texts so..

[1800-page-not-found]

Oooo ok genshin females (mostly Lisa and beidou) with a flirty s/o who just DIES when someone flirts back like s/o is like “uh…I’m…um..well..”

you guys i havent played genshin during the whole 3.7 update lmfao 😍

its summerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

I'll do Lisa, Beidou, and Yae Miko x reader

fyi i dont know how to flirt bc i personally dislike relationships irl so i searched this shit up. im aromantic but fictional characters are just so pretty

this also adds to the fact that im street stupid (but im academically smart tho trust me bro)

i lied im not going to use pickup lines i searched up online and theyre actually horrendous

"Lisaaaaa!" you smiled.

You were Lisa's library assistant, and the two of you were organizing new books while the library was closed.

"Yes cutie?" You laughed, "Me? cute? no way! If anything, I'd say youre the absolute cutest!"

It was quite hard to think straight after someone as pretty and perfect as Lisa complimented you.

"A-anyway," you stuttered, "could you help me sort out these books? I dont know where these go..."

You picked up some books from the delivered box full of books and started flipping through the pages trying to determine what genre the book was. It was hard determining if the book was fiction or non-fiction considering the bizarre events that happened in teyvat. You also didn't notice the quiet advancement of lisa's figure walking up to you.

"These go in the fiction section cutie." she whispered in your ear.

"R-right!"

You shot up and dashed to the other side of the library where all the other fiction books were. It was quite hard flirting with lisa, she'd always beat you to it, flirting with you at every waking moment and possibility. Today however, things were going to change!-

"You didn't think a carved wooden duck could actually be the former dendro archon and sang as a duck did you?" lisa teased you to the brink of embarrassment.

Thank barbatos that there was no one in the library.

"Well, I didn't finish reading it! Yeah!" you shot back, face buried in your hands as you blushed.

You were always unable to flirt with lisa without getting flustered as you could always count on her flirting back but well, more flirtatiously. Hmm...Maybe you were doing this on purpose?...

~~~~~~~~~~

As you walked around the city of liyue, you were spacing out as the day slowly became night. Your trail of thoughts stopped after you felt a hand tap your shoulder.

"[name]!" Ah, it was beidou. "Whatcha' thinkin' about?!" She laughed, bottle of alcohol in hand.

You assumed she got drunk from a dinner party or something, after all it was a bit odd seeing the captain on land.

"Ah, I was thinking about you darling~" You smiled at her, giving a smooth wink.

"Hahaha!" She laughed whole heartedly.

"Whaaat?" You playfully frowned. "Can I not think about someone as charming as you?" You gave her a grin.

"Nice to know you think I'm charming!" she laughed again, but then suddenly she snaked her arms around your waist, and slyly smiled.

"W-what are you doing?!" You blushed and used one of your hands to cover her eyes. "S-stop looking at me like that!!"

Beidou laughed as she peeled your hand off her face and held it while her other hand was busy holding you.

"You're all talk and no bite when it comes to flirting hmm?~" she started to slur her words. "Betcha' didn't think I would do this did you~"

She smiled and shrugged. "What can I say? You really thought flirting like that to me wouldn't make me fall for you? You have quite the charm, give yourself some credit!"

~~~~~~~~~~

"Oh my, [name], I didn't expect seeing you here~" yae miko hummed as she sat down next to you in Uyuu Restraunt, eyeing the many empty bottles of sake around you as you slumped down on the table.

"Hmmm?" You drowsily turned your head (which was still lying on the table if I may add) to face her. eyes widening you struggled to sit straight. "Ah! its the suuuuuper pretty fox shrine lady! When we met for the first time, I just couldn't keep my eyes off you! Your name is um...its uh..." You paused, lost in thought.

"Silly [name], we're dating already. I can't believe you forgot me..." Her ears flopped down and you panicked.

"N-no! I didn't forget-your name is...its y-yae miko right? Please don't be sad!"

"Awe, so you did remember!" She smiled at you, seeing your eyes sparkled looking at her rather cute and fluffy ears. "Do you wanna pet me? Hmm?" As she leaned in closer, you started to blush as she picked up your hands and placed it on her ears.

"Ohmygosh-their so soft!!" you said excitedly.

This however, allowed yae miko to slowly close the distance between your faces, until your noses were practically touching. Unfortunately for you however, it was too late to realize as yae miko planted a kiss on your lips.

Like some cliché excited cartoon highschooler that got asked out on a date with their crush, you fell onto the ground and rolled around like a ball, kicking your feet. "Ah!~The super pretty shrine lady kissed me! Ahehehehe!!" you blushed

Yae miko could only smile at your antics while drunk. "How cute..." She muttered under her breath.

Later on, she bridal style carried you home.

~~~~~~~~~~notes

some of you guys got hella concerning usernames (you know who you are)

are you guys even real or

[kings-highway]

hi, i saw that you’ve been sharing your thoughts on hq rarepairs! what do you think about oisuga?

mhmhmmhmmhmhmh 🤔

honestly one of my least favourite haikyuu ships. I actually really like IwaOiDaiSuga as a polyship, and Oisuga is always the weak link holding me back lol. BUT that being said I do see why people like them, so...

Suga, absolutely, buys Oikawa flowers. I dont think it's something anyone else had done for Oikawa, and he barely understands it, but after big games, or before dates, or on special days, birthdays, Suga shows up with a small boquet of flowers, or a single rose, and is very consistent. Oikawa unwittingly falls in love with this trait which is why it hurts so severely when he finds out that Suga will mercilessly stop doing this while they're fighting. It's like being stabbed in the gut when Suga shows up for their date without flowers and Oikawa KNOWS its because of XYZ fight from the weekend they havent made up for.

They definitely help calm each other down. Its counterintuitive to a lot of their friends, but they actually end up tempering each other's louder qualities, and can spend quite a while just curled up, legs tangled, reading books together.

Suga is OBSESSED with Oikawa's hair and won't shut up about it. "I cant believe this is your natural colour" "baby please get off my head."

Also Suga would absolutely BALL when Oikawa moved to Argentina. Like... just the most obscene sobbing mess making a scene. Not even funny.

Oikawa is the BEST gift giver for Suga specifically but this is nintey percent because he has no standards for himself and with straight up pay Asahi/Daichi/Kiyoko to find out what Suga wants. He refuses to not make his birthday/christmas exactly what he wants.

Providing you subscribe to a headcanon where Oikawa has money - he spoils the SHIT out of Suga. Like he himself is a bit of a diva, but he projects his entire diva energy onto this little boyfriend of is and insists Suga gets everything he wants. EVERYTHING. He's fully aware he's doing it. Its intentional. He wants Suga to know.

Overall Ratings:

For me, Personal Interest: 1/10

Concept/Potential: 6/10? I see the vision but I struggle to see the vision

[buffyfan145]

so i read quite a few of your posts and spammed you with likes, i hope you don't mind too much but you are perhaps the most informed person on trop tea i have came across and your speculations make me more excited for s2 😅

so from what i understand, there has been a very little info on galadriel's storyline compared to other characters? all we know is that she is with adar and elrond is trying to save her, then she fights sauron. and as for sauron, he spends most of the season with celebrimbor (can i ask what's that horrible fate of his? i havent read the books).

tbh, my delulu ass hopes that the fact that gal's storyline is so under-the-wraps means that it's going to be smtng special and spicy (instead of her having a reduced screen-time), and the actors being more open about haladriel stuff is bc that "surprise" storyline has to do with them. has it been conformed that they will use their mental bond in the season?

ahhh, anyways, your theory about galadriel going with sauron after being alienated by other elfs is *chief's kiss*. i will personally go and kiss the ring of the writers if that's true! i have also been seeing speculations about sauron chasing galadriel but not sure what's that based on (saw it on twt but then decided to avoid the twt space bc im afraid of possible ship wars ruining my experience for s2 since i saw a couple of sauron and celebrimbor shippers say they will have sexual tension or smtng. totally fine with shippers being shippers but i have had such a bad experience with ship wars that i want to just altogether avoid even witnessing them).

sorry for a long ask/rant! thanks for all your posts, they are really interesting! ❤

That's no problem and thanks so much!!! 😀 Yeah, I keep up with all the spoilers and news now as this show has become one of my major fandoms now and I get like this and those who followed for over the years know when I get into a show or movie series. LOL I'm going to post most of this behind a cut since it's got major spoilers for the season but will say Morfydd has talked a lot about Galadriel's storylines and her getting Nenya is huge part of this too, and her, Charlie, and the writers did talk about her and Sauron's mental bond and that it will be a huge part too. Morfydd did film "Starve Arce", a horror movie which is out now, while s2 was filming but I don't think it impacted production that much since the cast is so large and s2 was filmed over 9 months. Also this season has been confirmed to be Sauron centric so it's more centered around him as the lead, but she's still listed by Amazon as the female lead and has second billing under Charlie. So now to the spoilery parts.

So again Galadriel's main storylines from interviews and the trailers are receiving Nenya and learning how to use it, the mental bond she has with Sauron (which they also confirmed will be a huge part of the show till it ends with season 5) and some sort of creepy vision early on in the season, being outcasted by the other elves and even causing issues with Elrond, she has scenes with Cridan and Gil Galad too as her fellow elven ringbearers, the fight with the barrow wights with a team of other elves, getting captured by Adar, learning from Adar more about Sauron, forming an alliance with Adar including what seems like to use her as bait to lure Sauron out, and then as we saw in the final trailer the big confrontation she has with Sauron and showing him Nenya. Plus, they could still be hiding things from us too as these trailers are only mins and we have 8 episodes total and if like in season 1 they likely are all over an hour long.

Celebrimbor's story is so tragic too. He actually gets killed by the orcs and dies in a horrible manner, which is also likely why the show's rating increased as it's even more violent than season 2. I don't want to spoil it too much, but he will die in the season finale and Sauron does horrible things before that to him both physically and verbally. It's very much like an abusive relationship which is why I don't ship them. I understand that others do but their scenes are going to be so hard to watch. Both Charlies and the writers have called it a friendship or bromance, but those terms seem to suggest they aren't going for it to be romantic either but a friendship that turns violent and more into Sauron/Annatar being master. But this does show Sauron treats Galadriel differently to everyone else.

But yeah I'm hoping there won't be a ship war but I doubt it'll be in this case. Celebrimbor also in the books wanted to marry Galadriel himself in the 1st Age but she fell in love with Celeborn and married him instead. I posted before how that could bond Celebrimbor and Sauron as they'll both end up losing her to Celeborn. If any ship war happens it'll actually be whenever Celeborn comes back as we all know from the books and movies Galadriel ends up with him and they still have to have their daughter as they can't change too much and still have to make sure the LOTR books/movies play out the way they do when this show ends.

I'm still thinking, like others now too, that it is possible she does go with Sauron at the end of season 2. Especially if she fully is cast out after working with Adar, using Nenya, and then all those that die in the battle including Celebrimbor. Sauron still hasn't given out the 9 rings to the men or created the One Ring by the end of s2 so he has to get to that in season 3, and her s3 storyline is a mystery too. It seems like a possibility like others and I have pointed out that they could leave together, whether she's in charge for now thanks to Nenya and her new powers, or not. She will find her own kingdom of Lothlorien and be queen there so we might see that play out but eventually if Sauron's with her it will still end in tragedy as he keeps falling deeper into his dark ways and will go back to Numenor, and her husband Celeborn will be back. We'll get more info as the episodes air but I can see something like that happening.

[thorfishcrusher]

first httyd rant of many!!! yahoo!!!

this is kinda just me nonsensically talking about the alphabet(s) used in httyd because theyre kind of inconsistent?? to put it simply

insert menacing dot dot dot here

googling "httyd alphabet" lowkey made me sob cuz there were so many different variations of the symbols they used, from somewhat official sources to definitely not official ones.

they all do share elements from the futhark runic alphabet used during, or around the time period viking were in their golden age. more or less; i honestly dont know too much about runes so i apologize in advance for anything im wrong about

runes used in that time period weren't very specific, they were designed to easily carve into the materials they were using and mostly relied on just sounding things out. like lets bring that back that sounds WAY easier than learning 20 different variations of spelling the same word

younger futhark(which was more popular during the viking age,) for example, only had 16 characters, in contrast to the 24 characters in the modern english alphabet. more often than not, translated runes are littered with spelling mistakes.

that doesn't mean the vikings weren't less intelligent than people today, spelling and writing just wasn't a necessity as it commonly is in current times.

but anyway, the alphabet systems used in the books, movies, and tv shows can be directly translated into modern english, long as you ignore all the stupid ass inconsistencies (this is directed at the films, not the books)

both the movies and tv shows have similarities to futhark runes, though the movies appear to be inspired by anglo saxon runes, and the tv shows do have similar characters used in elder futhark. neither can be 100% translated to any sort of alphabetical system used at the time, and i believe berk has developed their own writing system over the centuries.

in the movies (at least from what i know) the way words were spelt were influenced on how they were sounded out, while the tv shows were slightly more correct for the future day standards. so congratulations, you can most likely spell better than hiccup in the movies. the punctuation system isn't really clear, and in futhark variations words were primarily just separated by dots. though, according to that one episode in rtte that i totally remember completely watching where snotlout shat on his dads grammar, i imagine people in berk have a more complex grammar system.

on top of that, quite a lot of people in berk seem to have the ability to read and write, more than the average viking tribes of the time. id like to assume they put more emphasis on learning to read efficiently because of the dragon book. information regarding dragons was important, and so id imagine being able to to proficiently record said information was important, too. thus the berkians (and perhaps surrounding tribes, outcasts, etc) adapted to better suit their priorities

ummm yeah idk thats kinda it

i say as if i havent put more thought and time into this dopey ass fictional thing than i have with actual beneficiary stuff

tl, dr; did you seriously scroll all this way to see if there was a summary? youll be disappointed because i am the master yapper and i am unable to be quick with my words

but basically just me talking abt the differentiating runes used in httyd, and how they connect to real world languages at the time, wnd um er um yo MOTHER

ive literally had this account for a day and ive written a 10 paragraph essay on silly little symbols

ill probably be using rtte's alphabet cuz it seems relatively easy for my little pea brain

[user-needs-new-hyperfixation]

Can we get some Sherlock headcanons if you havent done them in the past 👉👈

I did do a few, but I can keep going!

The Stradivarius was a gift from someone important. Maybe a parent, maybe a client from a case that meant a lot to him. Maybe Victor Trevor. It and the skull ring are the only items Sherlock really places any significant value on (at least pre-TFP).

The memento mori ring itself is something he bought for himself when he left uni; a reminder that life is fleeting and must be both enjoyed and used well. For all his silliness and sometimes selfishness, he does have goals and ways he wants to change the world (even though the anime cut them out RIP). The ring is a reminder of those goals.

He really likes to doze with his head in Liam's lap while Liam reads to him.

He soaks up information like a sponge when he's interested in a topic, and he's a note-taker, but a very messy one. The first time he and Liam attend some academic lecture together Liam kind of wants to cry when he looks over and sees something like this.

He's quite a good artist, because it often comes in handy to both his work and his hobbies. He drew little doodles on the back of that math exam and Liam kept it tucked into a book in his study from then on.

He likes Louis, and slowly works at weaseling his way into his heart post-timeskip.

He kinda hates Moran though (they're competing for who gets to be William's favourite dog.)

Speaking of, he likes dogs. I always imagine post-canon Sherliam having like three dogs on their country beekeeping estate.

At some point along the way, he started kind of accidentally composing music inspired by the Lord of Crime; jaunty, exciting pieces with dips into sadness and longing. Once, John stood in the doorway and listened to him play -- watched the expressions playing across his face, heard the ups and downs of the music -- and wondered to himself, "Could Sherlock Holmes be in love?"

Thank you for the ask!! 😊

[moonshine-nightlight]

Being sick for the past week meant that I had nothing better to do today than lay in bed and refresh tumblr waiting for chapter 34, and seeing it at the very top of my dash was the highlight of my day! The wait was definitely worth it, my health for the duration notwithstanding lol

SPOILER WARNING FOR PAST CHAPTERS IDK HOW TO PUT READ MORES IN ASKS I'M SO SORRY

You made the right call taking the extra time to edit this doozy of a chapter—figuring out how to share Dale's exposition in a way that made sense and fit into the events of the story while maintaining tonal consistency must have been quite the process, between the restrictions of Sana's POV, regency genre conventions, and the story's (heh) natural climax being Dale's identity "reveal" followed by the wedding. I'm very curious if you currently have any ideas for how you're going to tackle this exposition in the novelization, or if you're inclined to handle it differently at all!

@weasellyferret

i hope you're feeling better! i'm so glad you enjoyed the new chapter!

i hav no idea if u can even put a read more in an ask anymore and i can't hide it now but my answer will be under the read more

thanks! i think some people really underestimate how helpful even self editing is to make things coherent, especially for a long chapter like this one that covered so much but also was literally just two ppl talking to each other (ppl lov to say they'll take any update, but lik, thats cuz they dont knooow lol and i dont just want it to b passable, i want it to b good).

with lore/backstory like this i also have to make sure it makes sense to readers who havent read any of it before nor know any of the even more info that I know because there's even more worldbuilding and dale backstory that wont end up in the story.

i'm glad u think i pulled it off to any degree because i was still pretty nervous when i was posting it that it did make sense, fit in the world, was followable, interesting but not just exposition monologue, etc

yeah, chapter 30 where they have the reveal convo is the primary climax of the story and that's also 'just talking' in a sense so its interesting to write this story in that sense lol

while i had the broad outline of the world and dale's backstory from the beginning (i did a little exercise where i sketched out a sort of Dale POV of chapter 6 to get into his mindset which was super helpful) as I wrote the story a lot more of that info became fully fleshed out/defined. so for the novelization, i'll probably try to work more of the info in earlier or have better allusions to it, which will make some of the info in chapter 34 more of a quick confirmation than the exposition itself

ie i might add a chapter with more detail on Sana researching with Dale's books that Bilmont smuggles and plant suspicions of what went wrong with the summoning; i might adjust the chapter after the attack to be more of a convo about the assassination that the grandparents interrupt where Sana can suspect more of Dale's past etc and generally spread out what i can so its more foreshadowed/natural - things like that

other aspects sort of have to be told to Sana because its POV limited, evn when it is updated to 3rd POV. i'll probably do a straight POV swap and minor edit ; then take a look at it as a whole, reassess things on my own, run those ideas by some writer friends/betas and get their thoughts, and finally my editors (who i used for DSM) are also very good with making sure worldbuilding fits in right and so their advice will be helpful - especially since they will only get the draft i giv them without knowing how it was and what changed etc

once chapter 35 is out (which i'm still writing because smut is a challenge to right and i write it more slowly than other things) i'll start slowly editing and passing along to betas the rest of the story (i've got thru chap 11 done and betas who only read those and who are chomping at the bit - u think u've had a long wait? lol) but it will be spring by the time i do any big edits/revisions and then i'll giv it to the editors, who i already lik, semi-lined up for that time period and idk how long they will take because its a long book and then i'll need to process their edits too so it'll be a lengthy process, but i hope everyone knows it will 100% b a novel and i hope they enjoy it!

now back to stabbing away at the smut writing ;)

[snow-143]

Water Coloured Tears | Jeon Jungkook

four- don’t waste my time (1.2k words)

Caffeine. What I need is caffeine, a lot of it, I decide. Maybe a pint of ice cream too.

I woke up at 9am. I'm not sure why, I never wake up early unless I absolutely have to, but when I took a look at my phone the call had not long ended.

I wish I could say that I've been productive in the past four and a half hours but that would simply not be true. I've been pacing around my apartment, more than likely disturbing my roommate.

More than likely is an understatement, I definitely disturbed him, he made that obvious when he came storming out of his room to throw a pillow at my head. I suppose I owe him a thanks considering that the well aimed pillow is what made me finally leave the apartment. 

Which brings me back to my first point, I need caffeine, it's all I can bring myself to think about on my way to the café. Favouring the thought of the bitter liquid rather than the anxiety filling my chest. 

At least with me getting there early I'll have time to mentally prepare myself. That's what I was hoping anyway. I even brought a book, hoping I'd have time to read a bit to distract myself, but no. Fate clearly had plans to give me a heart attack instead. 

One might think I'm being dramatic, which I'll admit I do tend to get lost in my emotions a bit. However, I'm not being dramatic when I say my heart stopped. Will I ever get use to seeing his stupid face again?

Sighing I make my way over to him, not before sending a longing glace over to the counter. 

When I finally reach him he's staring directly at me, looking like a deer in headlights. You'd think that I had forced him here by the way he's peering up at me.

'Quit looking at me like I'm holding you for ransom,' One thing about me is that I am not a morning person in the slightest, I may have been up for hours now, and maybe it's not even morning anymore but from the very little sleeping I had I would die to go back to bed right now. So in my eyes it is definitely still morning and I am in no mood to be looked at like I'm forcing my presence on somebody. 

'Sorry,' his voice is small, timid. Although, I'm glad he's shifted his gaze from me I can't help but feel guilty at my harsh tone.

Deciding to distract myself, and him, I move the conversation onto the project instead, 'So, are you wanting to start taking photos today or just go over what we want the over all project to look like?'

And there's that look again, that's when I realise he's brought nothing with him. Not the camera, his laptop and not even a note book or sketch book. 'Jungkook, please tell me you havent dragged me here just to waste my time.'

'I havent dragged you here just to waste your time?' His expression is far to sheepish for me to even entertain the idea that he might be telling the truth.

'Enlighten me then, what was your plan when you invited me here?'

When no reply comes I stand up to leave, 'Message me when you're actually ready to work on this project, until then don't waste my time again.' 

At least I'll save money on the extortionate prices of coffee on campus.

'Hey, wait a minute.' Without me even realising he's spun me around to face him again, holding my wrist much like he did after we got paired together. 'We can at least go over what we want the project to look like while were here.'

Sighing, I meet his eyes, actually meet his eyes instead of avoiding them like I have been, 'Only if you pay for my coffee, Jeon.' At this he smiles.

'You and your caffeine addiction.' It's said as a mutter. As an inside joke. A joke we used to share.

Without even waiting for a reply from me he's already making his way to the counter. I amuse myself with the thought of what he's going to order me, the picture of him trying to find something to order for me is a funny one. I just hope he picks something I'll actually enjoy.

Before I know it he's setting a drink in front of me and taking his seat opposite to me.

Looking at my drink my smile vanishes. He got my exact order. My completely bazar order that everyone questions me on. Even my favourite cookie to go with it.

My smile is back, a sad one now. Sitting here with him now feels far to familiar to when we went to visit colleges together. 

I would always insist on visiting the cafes, and well he would amuse my request. I would insist that I couldn't go to a college that didn't have good coffee. 

Now that I think about it we came to this café back then, sat at the table just left to us. Now it's occupied by a couple, giggling over a shared slice of cake.

I wonder if that's what we looked like back then. Wonder if there was someone in a situation similar to mine now looking at us with resentment at our happiness. I know that that's what I'm feeling right now at least. And I know that It's petty of me.

'So, I'm sure you've already got plenty of ideas for this project. What are your thoughts?' His words snap me out of my trans, bringing me back to the current situation. 

He's right, I've already got so many ideas. 

My favourite being that we make pieces that seem loving but you can change them to look heart broken, but also some show loving pieces mixed with the dark side of love. It'll show both sides of being in love, the ups and the downs. 

I also want us to work on one of the pieces together. To show that a relationship is a partnership. Although, a massive part of me is against this as it'll mean more time spent with Jungkook, I'm willing to suck it up for the symbolism.

The rest of the time is spent with me telling him my ideas and him adding onto them. He didn’t fully understand what I meant at first but when I gave some examples me caught on pretty quickly.

I try to ignore his smile when I reveal that I've already gathered some reference pictures so we can be on the same page for the project.

As our professor said, they need to be cohesive and I'm not taking any chances on messing this project up. Even if that means I'll have to work closely with Jungkook. 

'See, I knew you'd already have this all planned out. You don't even need me at this rate.' God did I wish I didn't need him to pass this assignment.

prev | m.list | next

///////////////

a/n: ik the art project doesn’t make a lot of sense rn but it’ll be more clear on what she’s planning when they actually start

[saewokhrisz]

hiii!! 3 things..

1) for your mask expression art where goro's mask is confused, you said you took inspiration from atsv? what is that, if i can ask?

2) in persona 4 arena , theres a shadow suppression unit named labrys and she essentially only wears yasogami's highschool uniform so if you look at labrys and aigis, the idea of shadow suppression unit goro works very well because his school uniform is nice enough that he can hide his princely (& maybe later darker?) outfit and appear more human when theyre in public (excluding ears of course.. those can be passed off as headphones however).. i just thought thatd be something you would find interesting

3) in norse mythology there's the myth of loki killing baldr, so skadi traps him below the earth with chains made of what's holding his 1st child fenrir down as well, and poison from a creature (i cant remember the exact creature unfortunately) but he stays there until the ragnarok (the end of the world) and his wife, sigyn, who puts up with all his mischief and the fact that 4/6 (or 4/5, depending on what iteration you look at) of loki's kids are not sigyn's at all (hel, the horse he gave birth to, fenrir, and jormungandr are the ones not sigyn's.. nardi and vali slash just nardi is sigyn's) . but anyway sigyn holds a bowl and catches the poison so loki doesnt suffer, and every once in awhile the bowl fills with poison so she has to go outside to dump it out, and loki withers in pain because while she is gone the poison drips down his head and it causes earthquakes.. but anyway. this all reminds me of engine room (being trapped & in pain, etc) and its also.. loki. so sigyn as akira and loki as akechi art would be super duper cool.. i encourage you to look into both loki and robinhood's myths because robinhood era-myths also include the mention of mordred, the incestous son of king arthur who kills his way to the top yet his revenge fails (reason unspecified, it can be assumed he was killed himself or robinhood took his revenge for him) and his outfit is suspiciously similar to that of the black mask's, from the horns to the black getup.. mordred is akechi, akira is robinhood, and robinhood's merry band of thieves are the PTs.

ty for listening to my rambling :D no one really mentions mordred and i think him and akechi's symbolism is so important.. also! What You've Already Buried by malevolentmango on ao3 touches on a lot of loki's myths and such if youd like to learn about it that way :D

sorry the face i made seeing how long this ask is AHSJGF took me a min to answer

1)ATSV is Across the the spiderverse ! that movie inspired quite a few things about my art style, that also just happen to work really well with p5s visual motifs since the comic book inspiration and heavy use of colour blocks and halftones, as well as they make the spiderman masks eyes emote, since they have them on for a big portion of the film, and its the cutest thing ever

2) Ive seen Labrys' design! she always reminds me of miku if im completely honest BWAHA but yesss he could possibly hide it very well, also the fact that he always wears gloves could hide his fingers too :D

3) havent touched too much into norse myth besides the surface level knowledge of it that i obtained thru osmosis, mostly from friends who were into it. also i loveeeee binge reading wikis and link hopping (did it with gnosticism -> ended up inspired and made the ophiomorphos piece hehe) but its such a spontanious thing for me, i shall keep it in mind tho :D i did wanna at some point read up on hereward more specifically, since out of his 3 personas him is the one i have not a single clue about but i....forgot...i really dont give a lot of love to hereward sobs

[masckarlach]

OC questions tag meme!

THANK U USER FRAY @bg3 FOR TAGGING ME!!

i will be doing only wren bc ill be so honest theyre the only bitch ive developed

under cut :3

Name:

wren!! chose virtue name harmony but doesnt use it bc she thinks its cringe (subject to change throughout game, not Quite sure)

Nickname(s):

tavernkeeps tend to call them birdie or little bird :p other than that, their older sister calls them spots a lot (due to her little boney growths along their forehead and cheeks)

Gender:

wren doesnt think about gender much other than their chest is a nuisance. they dont think abt it in the sense that being a woman isnt something they necessarily like. see themself as similarly with being a man itslike. nonbinary by virtue of genuinely just not percieving themself and not wnating to

Star sign:

copypasting frays explanation here!! im not so good at lore stuff so my answer will be... off!

this is a little difficult because realms lore has changed on this a lot, if i'm correct in my information. from people being blessed by stars or entire consellations to each month actually having a sign in more recent lore. here is a link anyone doing this for realms ocs (like bg3 ocs) can use to figure this out! the lore on stars and consellations in the realms is spotty at best, but this could be helpful if you wanna go that route!

wren was born at the end of marpenoth, a few days from the start of uktar :3 their sign is praying mantis but i dont know what this means

Height:

just wanted to show wrenlach height giff :3

Orientation:

wren themself isnt too sure of this. theyre pretty sure theyre not into men but they like... havent really explored much outside of flirting with everyone they meet. they dont know but i do. trheyre a nonbinary lesbian.

Nationality/Ethnicity:

wrens an Unspecified Tiefling with a human mother born and raised and living pre Worm Abduction in the lower city of baldurs gate

Favourite fruit:

wren likes apples and pears :3 they think they taste like sand but they like the taste of sand

Favourite season:

wren likes whenever its not too hot and not too cold and not too windy and not too polleny. consitution (8) of a sheltered victorian noble child

Favourite flower:

wren likes potato flowers :3 theyve always been more of a herb person than a flower person truth be told

Favourite scent:

freshly baked bread. when its still soft. a little luxury she afforded herself once in a while whilst in baldurs gate, occasionally given as payment for a days work. wren likes the smell of bread.

Coffee, tea, or hot chocolate:

given the lack of monster energies in faerun lets go coffee. she thinks it tastes like pee pee and poo poo but shotguns it bc it makes her buzz

Average hours of sleep:

anywhere between 1 and 24 hours. roll a dice baby.

Dog or cat person:

wrens an equal opportunities animal enjoyer. dogs maybe. bc wren likes birds and cats keep killing her friends

Dream trip:

wren would like to stay home tbh. adventuring has made them grow as a person bc if they had their way theydve stayed curled up with the artifact in an abandoned house theyd found

Favourite fictional character:

the mermaid from the mermaid smut book wyll, wylls dad and shart have read.

Number of blankets they sleep with:

ideally every blanket in existence. they can make do with 1, maybe even none but they will complain abt being cold and the lack of pressure

Random fact:

wren bites their fingers so her hands are always chapped and bleeding

TAGS!!!!!!!!!!

@bigfatlesbian @oyyokat @orkbutch @lesbianshadowheart @atomicbouquet-heart and anyone else who wants 2 :p

[wewontdieunbloomed]

this is part two of unlearning the bad things i unconsciously learnt from last year.

part one was the negative default pessimism i fall in to, which i keep calling it me being emo which means i dwell in my “misery” for far too long, instead of trying to think of something positive to get myself moving out of the bad zone i am in. as we are often told, sadness and negativity gets comforting, it feels like you are protecting yourself. but one cannot see beauty in life and find joy for oneself if one does not make oneself vulnerable.

and so making myself vulnerable is what ive been doing. trying to romanticise this state that im in, a liminal space, at crossroads. its not the most ideal, too many things are unknown and for the first time in my life im dealing with having barely any structure to my days, with nothing to do yet so much i should do.

it took me quite a while to stop lamenting this unknown and start returning to the foundations i built this blog and my entire philosophy off, the whole concept of “lest we die unbloomed” of making sure i dont realise one day ive wasted my time. and in small parts i like to think ive made progress on that

the focus now is the second part. i lost a lot of my attention span and impulse control, and today i reached a horrible point where i am sitting on the kitchen floor at 9 with no dinner, having ruined my microwave dinner out of a lack of common sense. i am not sure if all this recent muddling is because of covid brain fog or the horrifying amount of screen time i have had recently, but i was so sick of it. i have done a lot of things on impulse recently, and though today i had a really fulfilling day spending time with people i havent in a long time, when i got home and im back to reality of the things i havent done and been procrastinating for too long on, i felt horrible. this need to change, i realised.

so this is part two. it calls back to one of the values i set as something important to myself, being honest with myself. i know what im doing now is not working. i know that even though i use my planner im not sticking to it. i know my todo lists are not helping me. then why do i stubbornly stick to methods i know dont work? i told myself a year ago i would not change my system if it doesnt need to be changed. i have forgotten that i need to change it when it does. how silly! so im changing.

so in the last 2 hours in order to get myself up ive written todo lists on paper instead of in my journal. used a timer for every single step from shower to sweeping the floor to brushing my teeth. enough lazing around and letting simple things occupy too much time. its a parkinsons law thing.

enough doomscrolling and opening instagram when i have nothing to do. im setting a limit for a block of time in the day where i am not allowed to use social media, pwrhaps not any internet at all. i need to make drastic change, even if it seems inconsequential. it might not be academic but its personal. and my personal life and what i want to do with my time is worth taking big measures for, because it should be more important than all that revision for exams i used to do.

so the point f this ramble is to clear things out with myself. make some sense of whats goijg on. have a direction. tomorrow i have an interview. ill come home and do the chores i have to. prepare for my afternoon activity. go for lunch and my afternoon appointment. go for a run. buy dinner. write my applications. research on uni stuff. read a book. and all the other tint things i need to give more importance to even though they seem inconsequential. it sa new mantra ive gotten into ever since part one of this. that “this is the way” this is the new way. enough lazing. its time to go hard and be rurhless. take things up a notch because when else can i do it? go big from experiences to measures i have to take to discipline myself. this is the way.

04.04.2023

[wildflowerteas]

hey, hello. i’m not sure if you’ll recognize me, but this is mania.sama on ao3, and i just now found your tumblr on my for you page. i havent had tumblr very long, and it’s surprised just how many people i’ve enjoyed works of (writing, drawings, etc) are here. especially surprised to see you — not in a bad way, of course!

i’m not sure what to say. sorry, maybe, for not reading / up to date with your current fic. i want to be reading it, i really do, but i was caught up reading “crime and punishment”, focusing on my academia, etc, among other issues that’s kept me away from committing to any long-form fanfictions. i wasn’t even reading one-shots or writing anything for a little while. hopefully i will be getting back onto your fic so, because from what little i’ve read already when you first posted it, it’s going to be life-changing.

i want to say more, i think. ask a question or two? i’m just very excited to see that your also drawing — amazing artwork for the second perspective!! i genuinely couldn’t believe it was real at first — and also a similar age to me, which i find nearly unbelievable due to your insane talent and skill.

hm. i think i’ll ask this question: what are your top favorite books? this could be fanfiction, short-form stories, novels, series, etc. you can list as many as you want; if they seem significant to you, have changed you, or were simply that well done and enjoyable. you dont need to treat this as a book recommendation; think not what other people should read. just express your own thoughts on why you have chosen these works as your favorite! i’m excited to see what you have to say (should you chose to answer, of course!)

again, hopefully i will read the second perspective soon <3 thank you so much for all the work you’ve done so far.

OH MY GOD IT'S YOUUU !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm going to start this off by saying you quite literally changed my life. I go back from time to time and I read our little conversation in my comments threads and I get a little teary-eyed ( embarrassingly ). You gave me such a different perspective on my own writing and I've spent a while wishing there was something I could do to make you feel the same way in return. Do NOT apologize for not reading it!!! I'm absolutely in awe and so grateful you enjoyed the first one so much and if you enjoy TSP too that would actually make my head spin. Also, we're the same age?????? Hello?????? I'm so glad to hear about your life in the interim, though. I hope you enjoyed Crime and Punishment ( isn't it so good??? ). Also, you briefly mentioned writing yourself, so I may have to go back and stalk your profile for your works now.

Hmmm . . . to answer your question. This is pretty difficult because I've loved a lot of books over the years for nothing specific at all ( some of them are quite ridiculous if I'm being honest ). But here goes nothing:

When I was little ( maybe three-four ish? ), I loved Tumtum & Nutmeg, a series about a mouse couple living inside of a refurbished cupboard, because the books always came with recipes at the back ( that I would make for my family ). When I think about reading/my favorite books when I was a child, I always go back to this blurry rose-colored vision of me sitting on the couch at seven a.m., Tuesday morning, waiting to go to school, and talking my mother's ear off about the pastries in the book while Planet Earth plays on the TV. Lately, though, I've enjoyed reading Breasts and Eggs by Kawakami Mieko. Which, for a lot of reasons, has deeply resonated with me and kind of ruined my life. Womanhood in Japan, and womanhood in general, is dissected so well and explored with a lot of different character perspectives. It's just an incredible work and deeply personal to me as a queer, Japanese, and afab person. Empire of Pain, which was recommended to me by a friend, has become one of my favorite books as well. I've never really done well with non-fiction, but reading about the Sacklers definitely changed that. No Longer Human, and School Girl by Dazai Osamu. NLH I read in a school context ( Japanese language-learning classes ) and I wasn't really allowed to love it because of that ( who likes required reading? ). But I went back to it a few years later, when I was really struggling mentally, and it became something to me that I can't quite name or place. Not really a comfort. I'd actually say it was more of a wake-up call to teen me that actually prompted me to seek out help and rip down the fourth wall I'd put up between myself and others. School Girl I love for more technical reasons. Dazai really was a once-in-a-century talent. Poor Folk, by Fyodor Dostoevsky, was my reading-for-enjoyment book during spring semester of my first year at college. I loved a lot about it, but it's on this list because I'm emotionally attached to the characters because we were together for so long. On a less serious note: Bungo Stray Dogs ( Obviously, despite whatever Asagiri is cooking up) and Yona of the Dawn by Kusanagi Mizuho. Next to BSD, it's one of the manga I've been a fan of for over a decade, and I just could not imagine my life without it. Flowers for Algernon. I read this . . . oh gosh. Years ago. And I never reread it. That's all I'll say about that. Kira-Kira by Cynthia Kadohata. Again, a Japanese author ( there would be more, but I'm keeping myself contained here ) who would have thought? I think, by now, it's pretty clear I'm Japanese myself. Kira-Kira ( a Japanese onomatopoeia/mimetic word meaning 'sparkling' ) was a tearjerker, yes, but it also made me look out into the world and at my own identity with a much kinder lens. I fell in love with my own name ( which is the mimetic word for 'smile' --- niko-niko ) all over again. And I think, for that, it makes the list.

Honestly, I'm not sure these are my favorites. They're just the ones that come to my mind when I think about reading and liking literature in general. I'm sure if I was an English major or a CompLit major ( or if I was feeling particularly pretentious today ), I'd have more to say about them in terms of actual 'quality' or about their themes, but I don't.

I also want to say thank you so much for reaching out and asking this!! it's been so fun ( especially since I just got done writing a mind-boggling mess of a chapter for TSP hehe ). I really enjoyed talking to you the first time around and now that you're here on tumblr!!! I hope we can interact more I'd really love to be friends :,) <3 tysm agh. I hope you're having the loveliest of days. niko <3

[kanskje-kaffe]

What are your thoughts on cloneshipping? I recently got into it not really as a ship but I feel more like a crack ship that I sometimes go back too cause some of the art and stories are really cool. I also havent really watched much of tcw (I am busy and cant binge 7 seasons ) and i can see it in some fics but other fics i see them and the found family/brothers/brothers in arms. Sorry kinda rambling

Heyyyy no problem, ramble away haha! I love cloneships! I don’t really have any cloneship OTPs - I really go to bat for Rexakin and Foxakin and so far no cloneships have quite hit that height - but there’s some I really enjoy. I think the military culture and kinship makes for fantastic dynamics around trust and intensity, as well as belonging to a subculture that no one else shares or even can share. There’s a reason Val Kilmer said he considered Top Gun to be his first gay role LMAO! And you’re right, some of the cloneship artists and writers are SO talented. Amazing people!!

My favorite clones are Rex, Gregor, Fox, Howzer, Fordo, Echo, Wrecker and Tech from TBB, and Fi from Repcomm, but I’d basically give my life for any of the boys and I love hearing about other people’s special favorites!

(I’m guessing this is maybe off the back of the found family post I reblogged (sorry if it isn’t tho haha!) and I wanna make it extra clear on this post too that my view of “found family” is non-nuclear. A found-family that slots people into mom/dad/big bro/youngest sibling/etc slots is my idea of hell. I don’t like it for the Jedi or the clones. A group consisting of parents and their children is just called “a family”, and it’s great, and it’s completely not what found-family is. Found family is metaphorical - you get the love and support normally associated with family from a different source, ie, not family. A secret second thing.

I love the dynamic of clones as found-family and as military brothers in arms, both of which can become romantic relationships and do in real life, and while I can see familial dynamics between some individual clones I think the insistence some people have on viewing them as literal siblings is super weird. Like first of all there’s five million of them… this isn’t Ratatouille LOLLL Also I think it kind of flattens them from the vividity of this rich life and full culture and the unthinkable hardships they’ve endured together into like… Malcolm in the Middle in Space. (I also don’t think the literal-family reading is reflected in the text at all.))

If you do get time to watch some more TCW even in small doses I hiiighly recommend it, and the Repcomm books have amazing clone stories and characters too! You should message me off anon, I’d love to talk more about the crack cloneships you like too! 🤗🤗❤️

[silvershayde]

Sharing cus tbh I feel lonely rn and I'm very confused? Feeling s bit uninspired

So today (last day of classes before mid term break) I had an eye appointment and they said my eyes produce less tears, Haven't read up on it but they also mentioned technology and how it causes headaches

I'm almost done with school so I actually have soooooooo much free time sans the studying I gotta do, but I also wanne reduce my technology usage cus I have a crippling dependency ever since I had to revise my other hobbies to not get out of track with classes, but just thinking of picking up those hobbies again feels daunting and like, I won't be able to feel the love I had for them which makes me sad :(

I already crochet and have books to draw in, but writing for fic has always been online cus it's just easier to save and preserve my writing that way (plus more secure in my case) than to write ideas in a book and run the risk of them getting lost. But I really wanna cut down tech usage so instead of just writing out the plot in full I'll use paper and pen to write out the outline of my story plots and then make notes of the misadventures or side quests the characters go through and the characteristics of the characters

Honestly, I'm talking about this to someone else cus I kinda want an alternative perspective? I realised that school has made me so dependent on someone telling me what to do and I hate it, so I wanna try and practice independence more, especially planning how I wanna do my hobbies

okay, so as someone who has written stories both online and physically in a book, i was more productive writing it down on paper. sadly i did lose the book, but that was more because i did move around quite a bit when i was younger and it was hectic and not because of negligence on my part (then again i am also known for losing things but usually i eventually find them. and i actually don't know if i would read it back or not i was like 12 when i wrote it lolol)

I don't know too much about less tears can do to your eyes other than your more prone to have irritation and straight up scratches on the eyeball (i know this because my optician told me i had this but then didn't tell me what to do about it - still haven't done anything about it but i know eyedrops help)

honestly do what you truly think is best for you. if you're struggling with what to choose i suggest doing a pros and cons list and put em side by side. that's what i do when i'm truly indecisive and other's opinions don't really help. but! i will say that even if indecisive and asking others opinions, usually you lowkey know deep down what you wanna do and all it takes is someone else's thought process to know if you would fully go for it.

if you wanna cut down tech usage, instead of going cold turkey and making it harder for yourself, use night shift/night light (or whatever is your device/phone's equivalent) so you can reduce blue light at night. I know that androids have this black and white thing that gets enabled at a time for you. ALSO!! i cannot stress this, disable notifications. You'd be surprised about how much less you'd go on apps and stuff when notifs be off. But this is all the stuff that's worked for me personally, you can try these out to see if they work.

eye strain is a very real thing. technology/screens/whatever are usually what causes this and even looking away from a screen and doing something else can make it worse if it gets that bad. when you start to get that annoying thing at the back of your eyes or you feel a light ache around your eyes, know your slowly starting to experience eye strain and you need to relax them. having dry eyes i think make it worse because of the scratching/irritation it can cause and because if your eyes are dry enough, your ability to BLINK would start to get affected. and that's just a long day

about your other hobbies, i get it feeling daunting if you havent dabbled in a while, i feel it whenever i get back to drawing after a long while. all i can say to that is slowly ease yourself back into doing it. start small, because if you go in acting as if there has been no time between the last time you've participated in your hobbies, you could start being overly harsh on yourself if it isn't going as smooth as you wanted. but trying it out, is better than not at all. and it'd help reduce screen time

[sleepy-vix]

I have many many things to say about books and I am both gay and depressed lmao

I am currently reading Walden and the Picture of Dorian Gray, but it is dead week and then next week will be finals week so I am not getting through them quickly

I think I’m going to finish the picture of Dorian gray this weekend though, because I am writing a paper on the relationship between substance use and western queer culture, and that is one of the pieces of queer media I’m using. I know it’s not inherently gay, but I have found many sources calling it “one of the best homoerotic novels ever written” lol

I’m really excited about Walden because I’m finding it somewhat challenging to read (not to get through, it’s very interesting) and I don’t have a lot of books that challenge me while still holding my interest. I’m reading it through once and mostly just annoying little things like marking quotes and things to think about. Then I’ll reread it sometime in the future and do a more in depth annotation which is very exciting!

yay i was wondering where you were. thanks for reaching out :}

i havent heard of walden but i've read the picture of dorian gray! i read it a long time ago though so i dont have any useful or interesting analysis to provide you with, but im down to discuss it if you ever find something cool in it and need to talk about it

i love that there are so many things you can analyse about that book. i never even thought about analysing the relationship between his substance abuse and his repressed homosexuality. what are your thoughts on this? i can't see any clear connections between them but i might if i decide to reread it

i loved the book so much. oscar wilde's writing is so insanely good agsvsj. it was the first classic i read and i'm so glad it was because the themes it had was quite clear and easy to identify, and the story was really interesting aswell

also i got to show off my knowledge of it in literature class, since i was the only person in my class who had read it, and we were discussing themes in literature from the 19th century so that was a bonus ;]