#as u see i'm too hyped
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tuituipupu · 5 months ago
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the girls that get häärijä get it
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yikessims · 1 year ago
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The Santiago's farm.
Owned by Maxwell, under the care of the owner and son, Marcus. (RIP)
-Photo taken 11 years ago.
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scrawnytreedemon · 1 year ago
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So many Tumblr posts, even joke posts, consist of ordering people what do do.
#scrawny rambles#people have pointed out adjacent topics before#like guilt-tripping and shaming#but god the sheer amount of posts on this platform that are just telling people what they should and shouldn't do???#someone will like something or want to see more of it#and instead of doing more themselves or hyping up the thing they like#they take this weirdly bitchy condescending smiling-through-your-teeth tone saying why y o u should do it#usually including that you're not doing it because of x negative reason#i don't even disagree with the core topic or the thing they like most of the time#i'm just so fucking sick of it#i see this alot when it comes to shipping stuff too. and. ugh.#hot fucking tip: you're not going to get people to consider this thing with zeal if you're making it sound like a chore#all fan-creations come from passion and you're not going to inspire passion with guilt#or condescension#even if what you are pointing out is infact correct and true#as a bisexual afab *something* it makes me more intimidated to go into these spaces#i'm *less* likely to do it#like on that particular topic it is not wrong to say misogyny has tinted both the way female characters are created and handled!#that it is infact shitty that they get sidelined by their male peers even those more underdeveloped them#but like. most of these people aren't actively trying to be misogynistic. and most of them are also subject to *some* flavour of misogyny#you're guilting the victims of the phenomenon for struggling to connect with characters tinted *by* misogyny#it isn't just that they're underdeveloped it's that they're like. less than representation. if you get what i mean.#unfortunately of course this ends up carrying into characters that are genuinely well developed and that is shitty#it's good to point that out! but would it kill you to cut down on the guilt-tripping and *painfully* evident bitterness#this stupid topic has been losing me sleep for awhile now send tw-- ah shit. x?#lmaooo
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hungry-hobbits · 2 years ago
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i'm saying this as an almost 30yr old person who has kinda come to terms w the fact that i'll probably never be properly gendered in public and am at peace with it: BUT i think a lot of trans people are too hyped up over the idea that you have to be gendered correctly by everyone you ever meet, no matter how briefly, or they automatically have bad intentions - which isn't always the case because unfortunately you're not the main character and people are gonna make mistakes (yes that includes people close to you because everyone slips-up)
people get so hung up over casual, unintentional, and well-meaning misgendering, and are so quick to categorize it with the purposeful, blatant, bigoted type of misgendering when its really like - the old lady scooting past you in the grocery store calling you ma'am/sir out of politeness towards a stranger while she says 'excuse me' is probably not doing a microaggression towards you believe it or not
if theyre doing it maliciously then yes obviously you can feel bad about it, i'm not saying that at all, but its like when sam smith talked about how they were gonna be misgendered til the day they died; it's a hard thing to accept but you gotta accept it if you literally wanna get through any interaction with strangers ever
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bitbrumal · 2 years ago
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every time i remember kaeya spanked his way into a dragon husband i- & THIS SPECIFIC ONE? help me. kaeya's truly cut from a different cloth smh my head.
his entire view on zhongli / rex lapis became very fucking flexible despite prejudice ( terror & the hatred born of it ) purely bc of zhongli's reaction LMAO. kaeya:  *commits blasphemy, probably* zhongli vc:  joke's on you i'm into that shit
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accursedrainbow · 2 years ago
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*guy who only plays sonic adventure 2* getting a lot of sonic adventure 2 vibes here
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maraczeks · 7 months ago
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#oomferinas what the freak i literally am so 💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘 cville trips r always SO fun n vibeful it was so beautiful and lovely i love my#friends i love her hugs so m uch wtf#apr 21 2024#<3333 mwah#stop no she's so cute and i literally can't her hugs are the bestest in the world#ohhhh ok lemme jot this down then i'll journal later like a sane stable person but i'm too tired rn n just wanna record#but srsly cville trips are LACED like the most joy and heart and love and excitement#i was scared like in sept i hyped myself for her to be there and she wouldn't be but OH MY i gasped when i walked in that auditorium#and her surpriseeee like seriously seriously seriously. she get so excited and it's the most ever of any person and it is so precious to see#someone be so excited to see u n like it was so magical her hugs r truly the bestest i'm so warm and comforted rn like that is my best frien#gahhh i love her#n i love twee n srah#idk she's just so !!!! she's literally whatever sound exclamation points make idkkkk.#3 hugs im so normal#n thenennnnnnn jaime texting me when i was on the way back to check in bc i wasn't at church im crine she's <3 so <3#no but fr it feels so LONG since i last saw them in feb her hugs r trulyuyy#AND BRUNCH WAS SO FUN#ugh lovely lovely lovely im so full of joy<3#AUGH why i am terrible at remembering to take photos omyyyy#literally every time i see her i forget so i have No photos this is so sad#apr 22 2024#wishing i were so so normal but i cannot stop playing it back in my mind mymemory is a movie#I CANT!!!!!!!!#apr 23 2024#two days later .... embarassing#seriously i just where's technology that lets you record exactly how a hug feels bc. bcccccc
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soonhoonsol · 11 months ago
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did you know that I only excel at one thing and that thing is self-sabotage?
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youneedsomeprompts · 9 months ago
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~ SUBTLE LOVE ~ WRITING PROMPTS
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requested by: anonymous request: hi!! idk if this has been req before but do u have prompts for subtle love? it will take some time for u to realise that their actions are somth u do out of love. thank u!
Feel free to use and reblog!
Part 1 (kinda): ~ GENTLE LOVE ~ PROMPTS
listening attentively when the other is talking
taking the other into consideration whenever making a decision
smiling at the other to encourage them
taking over the other's tasks to disburden them
the last thing they're thinking about before falling asleep is always the other
sitting back and staying quiet to leave the stage for the other
giving the other their space, knowing they need it
enjoying the sound of the other's voice
distracting the other when they see they're distressed and close to freaking out
trying to learn every way to put a smile on the other's face
experiencing this strange feeling in their chest when the other comes to them for support and a word of kindness
"You can call me. Day or night. I'm there for you."
enjoying the most basic time spent together just sitting next to each other, each doing their own
hyping the other up
being their biggest cheerleader
checking up on the other regularly when they know they're not feeling their best
thinking about the other at the most random times
'Oh, this coffee has such nice latte art! I wonder if [person B] would like it.'
'Oh, there's a new movie showing in the cinema about an ice skater. [Person B] once did ice skating. Would they like this movie? Or are they even better at ice skating than the ones in the movie? I'm sure they're the best ice skater!'
stopping themselves from messaging the other too often
sharing their food with the other
always making another coffee/tea when they're making one for themselves because sharing is caring
smiling by instinct when they see the other
^ breaking into a grin and being unable to stop it
sending the other little notes of encouragement to show that they're thinking of them
"You're doing just fine. I know you've got this."
promising to catch up, even when there is no time at the moment, they're making sure it doesn't go under
"Wanna talk about it later? I will make time."
making the other a priority
giving their honest opinion when it's asked
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koushirouizumi · 2 years ago
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rosyblooom · 7 months ago
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all u need is a platform x | ln4 smau
PAIRING: lando norris x fem love island contestant!reader SUMMARY: y/n makes a one-off comment about lando norris being her type in a confessional, and the internet rolls with it all the way to lando norris' twitch stream. A/N: just bc i love me some love island 😌
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Love Island UK
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Twittter
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Twitch
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yourusername
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liked by yourbestfriend, landonorris, yourfriend and 105,830 others
yourusername alright guys, public voting is open! go, go, go!! make sure to vote for the person you want off your screens, so don't vote for y/n!!! tell your friends, family, everyone! we don't wanna see our girl go home anytime soon!! thanks u guys 🥰🥰
#LoveIsland
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username she's one of my favourite islanders🫶 stunning girl
landonorris so if we vote for her she comes OUT you say?👀
yourusername don't you dare🤣 username LMAOO LANDO U BETTER NOT SABOTAGE💀💀
username ugh she's so annoying she needs to stfu🙄 hope she goes home on friday
username he's in the likes👀 ohhh the show's just getting started I see🍿
username I've voted babes! (not y/n of course)
(liked by author)
username I'm sry but I'm gonna have to vote for my girl y/n BUT HEAR ME OUT it's bc there's a better man by the name of lando out here for her I think 😃
username sooo valid (I'm doing the same lmao) landonorris 😊 yourusername uhm- you guys😭😭
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Love Island UK
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loveisland
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liked by yourbestfriend, _jackfowler_, landonorris and 176,488 others
loveisland The public has voted, and that means goodbye to this firecracker! 🧨👋 By the looks of it, it seems Y/N might not need to do much searching for fish in the sea though... 👀
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username ok lando pack it up, jack fowler is in the likes😩
username ugh jack is so fine🫦 username LMAO NOT TOO MUCH ON MY BBY LANDO NOW😭
landonorris 🐠
username lmaooo ENOUGH username help he's so real😭
username finally the bitch is gone
username uhm... chile anyways so
username ppl need to stop putting her up there with maura, amber and the lot cause she's absolutely nowhere close bffr. I rlly don't see the hype🙄
username she's literally the first to break 1 million followers lmao the hype is very much alive even if u don't wanna see it😌 username yeah and how many of those are lando fans hm? exactly username oooh u sound bitter babe xx
username lando and y/n better freaking date soon tho cause if I find out this was all in vain I'm literally gonna flip😭
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thesun
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liked by username, username, username and 46,037 others
tagged: landonorris, yourusername
thesun Popular ex-Love Island contestant, Y/N L/N, has arrived in the UK to a warm welcome at Heathrow Airport, where she was greeted by family, friends, and a horde of fans.
Speculation about a potential romance between her and the famous F1 driver, Lando Norris, has been rife on the internet for the past few weeks. Many believe this could be the reason for her sudden dumping from the island, as fans allegedly orchestrated her exit in hopes of pairing the two together.
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username lando can do so much better than some trashy reality tv star 😑
username i got a pic with her!! she was such a sweetheart❤️
username im so excitedddd omg
username let's see what happens now then...😁
username 👀👀
username omg why are ppl still talking about her smh
username i voted for her so it better pay off🙏 i'm looking at u lando
username me and you both 🤝
yourusername posted to her story!
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[ caption 1: i'm backkk ] [ caption 2: cake bc there's 1.5 million of u guys here😭 AHHH TYSM 🫶🫶 ]
[ tagged: yourbestfriend, yourfriend + more ]
yourusername
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liked by yourbestfriend, landonorris, _jackfowler_ and 220,748 others
yourusername back in essex and straight to catching up with my lovelies xxx
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username lando norris dating announcement when 😃
username lmaooo her bed in the villa ain't even cold yet😭😭 username real! he should've picked her up from the airport smh chivalry is so dead😞
username telling you all about lando i hope
username and the fact that it's all lando's fault that you were voted off 😋 username LOL DON'T PIN THIS ON HIM NOW
landonorris welcome back y/n!
username loool what happened to ur free shoulders 🤣🤣
username JACK FOWLER STAY TF BACK 🤺🤺🤺 we're team lando + y/n here!!!
username IKTR😌
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yourusername posted to her story!
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[ caption: don't need ur shoulders, just ur arms and car 😌 ]
[ tagged: landonorris ]
f1gossipofficial
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liked by username, username, username and 14,026 others
f1gossipofficial Lando Norris has been spotted once again in the company of ex-Love Island contestant Y/N L/N, marking the fourth time in the past month the pair has been seen together in London. This time, fans observed them enjoying dinner together, appearing particularly close as they laughed and had their arms around each other.
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username real ones know y/n from the first ep of love island😌🫶
username I've been summoned🫡
username love island is bottom of the barrel trash smh anyone who enters that show is a dumbass
username lol okay.... anyway they look cute together🥰
username ahh u guys remember when y/n was in the villa and we'd all wait for lando's tweets during love island🥹 those were the times
username i wanted them together but now it's like when you watch a film in the cinema and then reach its end like what now?🧍‍♀️ username fanpage babe. u make a fan page trust me x
username ew keep her away from lando🤢
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yourusername
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liked by ellathomas_, landonorris, whitbrownxs and 587,442 others
tagged: landonorris
yourusername thank u love island 🤭
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username AHHH FINALLY IVE BEEN PRAYING FOR THIS🤩
username what do u wanna bet she only has 2 gcses🙄
username well that's a whole lot better than lando's 0 🤣
username @/yourusername i need ur game card RIGHT NOW cause i want mason mount 😩
yourusername all u need is a platform x username brb gonna apply for love island now🏃‍♀️💨
landonorris I think you missed a few spots baby
yourusername lol xxx username oh he's whipped lmaooo
username WHO VOTED Y/N OUT?? WE FUCKING DID ITTTT
username present🫡 username the way we had a vision and look at us now😌 we love to see it username cheers to us masterminds 🍻
whitbrownxs love you guys ❤️
yourusername ly bby xxx
1:06 ──ㅇ────────── 4:11
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misshugs · 8 months ago
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The Cameragirl || snc
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You've been Sam and Colby's cameragirl for some time now. Usually, nothing too crazy happened to you in most investigations, but this time...
warnings: paranormal activity, reader getting attacked, near death experience, strangling(?), cursing, angst?
a/n: took a bit of inspo after watching the boys' video of the asylum, but nothing exactly like it. just the fact that the place is an asylum
[part 1] [part 2] [part 3]
word count: 3.6k
[u n e d i t e d]
✮ ⋆ ˚。𖦹 ⋆。°✩
As they were making their iconic intro and explaining what this new place was about, you made sure to have a sturdy pulse whilst filming them.
"Today, it's just me, Sam and our lovely cameragirl, Y/n." Colby said, letting you shift the camera towards your face and smile at it.
"Hello there." You said, making sure your face was extremely close to the camera, merely because it has become your way of introducing yourself.
"And since it's only us today like the good old days, we decided to make something fun. ALL of us." Sam explained to the camera and smirked, looking directly at you.
You batted your eyes, looking at them while they kept on smiling menancingly at you. "This wasn't a part of the contract." You said, gaining a laugh from both of them.
You zoomed onto his face and began talking with this soft, almost narrative voice. A voice you very well knew they enjoyed. "What is this oh so fun idea you seem to be hyping about, mr. Golbach?"
"Why thank you for asking." Sam nodded slightly, moving his attention towards the camera. "The three of us are gonna do a little challenge tonight." He clapped his hands together as you began unzooming the camera, putting Colby back on frame.
"That's right, we're going to walk alone, lights out throughout some of the most haunted corridors from this place." Colby continued. "The owners of this place told us it gets freaky when people are alone, so we thought this might get us some good activity."
"We have some cameras with nightvision but we're not gonna see shit." Sam added, "After a while, we all should find our way back to the main lobby."
"So stay until the end to see how that's gonna turn out." Colby says, getting close to the camera before covering it with his hand, making you stop the recording for the cut.
"That was pretty good." You said, looking at the video slightly.
"You're still good with the challenge, right?" Sam asked, looking at you. You scoffed.
"Please. I wouldn't have come if I wasn't sure about it. Remember you told me about it before the video?"
"I know, I know. Just making sure, you know how I am." He laughs. "Wouldn't want you to do something you're not comfortable with."
"You're saying that like we haven't known eachother for how long?"
He chuckles. "You're right. I'm sorry."
"Alright, so since we're all settled, should we start right away?" Colby chimed in, looking at both of you.
"Not yet. This place has some good cinematic potential, lemme cook first." You said, looking around with your flashlight.
"Aight, we'll let you do your thing, I'll go ahead and look for the equipment." Colby said.
"Oh, shoot. I forgot to ask the owners about something." Sam said, taking out his phone.
"Go out with Colby, I'll be here waiting." You said, fixing back your camera to start recording.
"Alone?" They both asked, looking at eachother and then at you.
"I do my best work alone, gentlemen. You know that." You begin walking towards the shadiest corridor you've seen in your life, without even looking back.
"Oh wow. Fearless. She's trying to do the challenge before us." Colby laughed.
"Alright, I'll be super quick. If anything happens, just yell. As loud as you can." Sam said, smiling.
"Copy that." You laughed.
In the blink of an eye, you were left alone. You were used to these type of things, so it didn't bother you much. You've somehow become numb to all of this paranormal adventuring.
And that was one of the main reasons why you liked to take control of the camera, since you were able to keep your cool in stressful situations, making it easier for the viewers later on.
Plus, you didn't know how to act on camera and they were the professionals... allegedly.
Whenever something odd happened, you made sure to try and record as much as you could, in the best angles possible. You liked to joke around and call yourself a professional in your craft, although sometimes it wasn't even a joke.
You were passionate about it. The videos and the ghosts, it was only natural to try and do more, risk yourself to do something more interesting and outgoing.
That's a piece of yourself they loved about you. You were simply a perfect match in their combo.
As you began to do your cinematic, you began to have shivers. A sudden draft of air passing through you, as if a window suddenly opened.
Looking around, there was no possible way of that happening. You were in the middle of the corridor, absolutely no chance of an air draft simply passing through so randomly.
You thought it might've been a bit odd, but nothing you haven't felt before anyways. While you kept on making some videos, an eerie feeling of someone watching crossed over your spine.
The sensation of a presence slowly getting closer to you behind your back.
Almost feeling the heat of another person behind you, towering over you.
Hurriedly looking back, you were met with Sam's hand almost touching your shoulder. He stopped midway, knowing he got caught trying to scare you. "You bitch." You spit out, making him laugh.
"Damn it!" He said mid laugher. "I was so quiet this time, how do you always seem to know?"
"I can feel you lurking closer, you stalker." You looked away from his gaze, trying to ignore the thoughts of his pretty face. You began walking back to where he came from, meeting Colby in the process.
"I'm not a stalker, if anything, I'm protecting."
"Quietly from the shadows, sounds like a stalker to me, but you do you." You smiled softly, looking at the confused Colby.
"I left for a second, what did I miss?"
"Stalker behavior, nothing else." You said, putting your camera up again and ready to record.
Colby shook his head from side to side, already being on your side of the story without even asking further questions. "I can't believe you brother."
"Wha- it wasn't-..." Sam sighed, defeated. He knew you were joking, so he wasn't going to win anyways.
You laughed and pointed the camera at them. "Ready when you are." They nodded and you began to record.
"So as you can see, in our hands we have some devices that we'll scatter throughout this first room. If you've been here before, you'll probably be familiar, but if you haven't, these are basically some motion censor devices that will let us know if something walks infront of it." Colby explained, turning one of the devices on and showing to the camera how it worked.
As they organized everything, the REM-POD immediately began beeping. "Oh, shit. That's the rem pod." Sam said, stopping on its tracks. "That was the temperature dropping."
You made sure the camera caught that as you got closer to it. "Oh fuck. I was feeling a bit cold since we got here." Colby added. "Alright. I think we're ready."
"Okay. If there's any spirit around that would like to communicate with us, we would like for you to use any of these devices we've put up for you." Sam started, as you made sure to get far enough from everything for the shot.
"You can touch these lights on the floor, or maybe this device I have on my hand." Colby continued, pointing towards the EMF reader. "We mean no harm, we'd just like to talk to someone."
A couple of seconds passed, looking around, waiting for something to happen.
"Maybe they don't want..." Sam began, before getting interrupted by the REM-POD beeping, making you hurriedly move your camera angle. "Oop. Nevermind. Thank you very much. Can you do that again if you're here with us? To let us know it wasn't something else?"
Silence filled the room for a while, before the device started to beep once again.
Excited, they began asking questions to this entity, expecting for it to be somewhat intelligent enough to give answers back.
Luckily, it was. It seemed to be someone that died inside the asylum, a woman. Curious about the story of this woman, they kept on asking questions. Some of them being answered, others being completely ignored.
Asides from the constant beep from their device, you heard a knock coming from one of the corridors. Quickly looking around, they stopped talking. "What?" Colby asked.
"Heard something." You whispered. The room went silent, followed by what sounded like footsteps getting closer. You turn the camera back at them and their faces were shocked.
"Holy fuck." Sam whispered.
"That was like... thumps. We're the only ones here, right?" Colby asked him.
"Yeah, we're supposed to be." Sam says, walking towards the place they heard the sound, quietly. You followed close behind. "Hello?"
Nothing. They kept on looking around, searching and at the same time waiting for something else to happen. "There's no one here." Colby says. "But that was clear as day."
"Super clear, the camera must've have heard that, for sure." Sam said, looking at you as you nodded. "That was crazy."
"Yeah, let's try something else but closer to this area, maybe it's more active." Colby said, and all of you nodded.
A couple of minutes later, and you were all set up. This time around, they turned on a spirit box to try and communicate better.
The idea was to first use it as normal, then for Colby to do the Estes Method.
And so, the spirits began to talk.
"What's this." It spat out. Colby and Sam looked at eachother, smiling.
"Hello, this is a spirit box, you can use it to communicate with us. Would you mind telling us who you are?" Sam said, looking around.
"Hello?"
"Hi, hello." Colby responded. "Who are we talking to."
"I'm scared."
"Scared? Scared of what?" Colby asked, furrowing his eyebrows whilst looking at the camera.
"Behind you."
They quickly looked behind them. "Oh, fuck. I hate that." Colby said, as you smiled at their gestures.
It quickly faded away when you felt the familiar presence of someone behind you.
Heart racing, you looked around for a second, but there was nothing there. It didn't mean the feeling went away, though.
"Monster. Care..." It seemed the audio cut before finishing the whole word.
"Monster... care?" Sam asked, confused.
"Or maybe it meant careful? Like, careful of the monster?" Colby questioned.
"It would make sense. What monster are you talking about? Is it harming you? Are you scared of this monster... or... person?"
It took a while before responding. Last thing it said, before a screech filled the radio was... "Run."
Quickly, they turned it off. They looked at eachother. "That was terrifying." Colby said. Sam nodded and sighed.
"Let's try and look around for some other place. This doesn't feel safe." Sam said and everyone agreed.
For the past hour of recording, moving around and joking here and there, you felt a bit uncomfortable. Usually, you weren't the type to get scared over the paranormal, but this place felt more eerie than usual.
You heartbeat has been increasing slowly, as well as a slight pain in your chest that quickly faded. You felt watched.
There was a point where you even felt slightly touched, quickly warning the boys about it.
Due to this, they almost discarted the idea completely, thinking you might be getting targeted, scared that it might do something to you. It took you a couple of minutes of convincing them to keep on recording before the conversation was dismissed.
You tried to brush it all off, as 'something you've felt before', but deep down you were really anxious about it. Perhaps it made you feel better to think about it being just the nerves.
But you weren't the type of person to feel these nerves for no reason.
"Hey, you good?" Colby touched your shoulder and whispered to you, noticing you seemed a bit weird. "You seem out of it today."
"Yeah, I'm good. I was just zoning out."
"Yeah, I noticed." He chuckled, looking into your eyes. "You sure you're okay though?" He raised an eyebrow, seemingly concerned. "You don't look well."
"What? Do I look like a ghost to you?" You asked, smiling, which quickly made him show that gorgeous smile you loved.
"More like you've seen one." You shook your head.
"I'm fine. I've just seen some shadows running in the corners of my eye, but nothing too big to point out."
He batted his eyes. "You've what?"
"Calm down, you know I see those things all the time. It's nothing new." Half of it was true. The other half, well... there was a chance you might've seen a whole figure standing close to a doorframe, but you felt your imagination was tricking you too much tonight, so you didn't say anything.
You weren't a psychic or a medium or something close to it anyways. If anything, you'd probably consider it more like a hallucination due to the constant lack of sleep you've been having lately.
"I know, I know, but still. You could tell us about it, you know? Maybe we all see the same thing you do and since you don't point it out, we don't notice."
You rolled your eyes playfully. You were about to say something, but a breeze passed through your ear, a soft whisper saying "Come play."
You jumped, covering your ear and walking closer to Colby. "Shit." You whispered.
Confused, he held your shoulders. "What? What? You heard something?" His worry was enough for Sam to stop setting the cameras up and walk closer.
"What happened?" He asked. You looked around where you were standing.
"Did you guys not hear that?" You asked, the shook their heads. "I heard something like... right next to me." When you said that, Sam began recording once again.
"Alright, so... apparently Y/n just heard something right next to her." He began explaining to the camera, pointing it at you.
"It was like a whisper, it.. uh... it just said 'come play', like, the creepiest shit you can say. I even felt the air on my ear, that shit made me jump." You tried laughing about it to not let the mood down, but it wasn't working much.
"Although I really want to, maybe we shouldn't do the challenge." Colby said, looking at Sam straight in the eyes, genuinely worried.
"Guys. Come on. Don't back down when we're this close." You said. "We're basically done for tonight, this is the last thing we're doing and we're out, right?"
"...yeah." Sam whispered. "Let's..." He sighed. "Let's do it. Just like she said, we walk through the corridor and come back straight away."
Althought skeptical, Colby nodded. "Fine. Let's hurry up then. The quicker we begin, the quicker we're leaving this place."
And so, everyone held their cameras and said their goodbyes. The three of you went through your respective corridors and began walking, alone, with no light.
"Alright guys. I'm not good at, like, talking to the camera but I'll try." You sighed, pointing the camera at your face while slowly walking the dark corridor.
"Honestly? I'm usually not as creeped out when we come to places like this, but this one is like... up there. It's giving me the chills, making me paranoid, I feel like I'm... seeing thing. Or maybe I'm just sleep deprived. That's... that's also an option now that I think about it."
Looking around with the camera, although it's absolutely useless, you started feeling out of breath. Almost as if the air didn't reach your lungs anymore. "It feels... hard to breathe." You took a deep inhale and shakily exhaled.
You gulped, your throat suddenly feeling dry as the lack of oxygen was evident.
"I'm just gonna walk... faster. I wanna get this over with..." And so, you did. But the further away you got, the worse it all felt. You felt your vision starting to get blurry although you could barely see anything.
You paused as your vision began to get used to the darkness.
At the end of the corridor, what you could shape out like a human figure was standing there. Seemingly the same one you barely saw before.
This time, it didn't seem to go away.
You were also alone.
Unable to breathe.
You don't know when it started, but you were unable to breathe properly. You choked, trying to regain yourself from the feeling.
Your neck feeling tight, your stomach hurting at the sudden feeling.
Putting your hands on your neck, you coulnd't feel anything that would make you feel this way. You started to get worried.
You felt as if you were being choked. You tried to scream, but all that you could spat out from your lips was a soft, quiet, 'help'.
Trying to turn around and walk back, you saw the figure again and got scared, falling towards the floor. You coughed for air, sucking back as much as you could but being unable to.
Leaving the camera behind, you tried to crawl back to where you came from, but the lack of circulation on your body failed you as you coulnd't handle it anymore.
Your body falling on the floor, the camera seemingly recording your movements come to a halt.
Your eyes closing, leaving you unconscious.
It didn't take long before Sam and Colby got back to the lobby. Waiting for you, something seemed off.
They knew the corridor wasn't as long as theirs. You should've been the first one out by that logic. They've been waiting long enough and they were starting to get worried.
Even though the concept of the challenge was to be alone in the darkness, the idea of you being in trouble was too much to bare.
Heck, even if you were pranking them, the anxiety of you not coming back on time was driving them insane, they were ready for a scare if it had to come to that.
But the scare they were expecting wasn't the one they got.
Minutes of walking and calling out your name came to a stop when they saw you on the floor.
Hurriedly, they ran towards you and fell to the floor, yelling out your name. "This isn't funny, Y/n!" Sam yelled, moving your body, only to notice how cold you felt. His heart sank.
"Y/n, come on!" Colby said, putting himself on the other side, looking at Sam. The color from his face was gone when he felt her body. Colby, worried, touched your body and understood why he looked that way. "Oh, fuck. Fuck!"
Throwing the camera to the side, Colby quickly checked your pulse. "Sam. Call 911. This is serious." You still had a pulse, but you weren't breathing. First thing that came to his mind was CPR.
While Sam began to call, Colby was trying as hard as he could to help out. He began doing mouth to mouth, trying to bring some oxygen back to your lungs.
Tears streaming down both of their faces. Colby started making compressions to your chest, while Sam was talking to the 911 dispatcher and using the flashlight to illuminate Colby.
Luckily, they weren't too late. You began to cough and moved to the side to spit out some saliva. You breathed heavily and both of the guys sighed in relief.
As you tried to catch your breath, they softly held you up in place while your color came back to you. You blinked a couple of times, adjusting your view to your surroundings.
When you looked at them, they hugged you tight. "Fuck..." Sam whispered. "Let's get the fuck out of here right now." He held you softly and helped you out, as Colby grabbed all of the cameras.
It was hard for you to walk. It felt as if a ton of weight was keeping you from even standing up. It felt as if your limbs went numb, the lack of oxygen probably acting up.
Sam noticed, and didn't hesitate on holding you up and putting you on his back so that you could rest. They began walking as fast as they could, reassuring you that you will be fine.
You were focused on getting your breath back while listening to them scream at the spirits.
"You are not allowed to follow us home." Listening to Colby talk like this, while taking all of the equipment made you feel light. You started moving your arms and made sure to hold onto Sam, closing your eyes.
"You'll be okay. We're leaving." Sam reassured you, waiting for Colby to grab everything and get out of there in a rush.
After the police arrived and handed you an oxygen mask, you started feeling much better. You had some marks on your neck, like some hands were just squishing the air out of you.
Your body... at first, you could even see your veins pop out of your legs because of your lack of color. The poor circulation that ran through your body for a couple of minutes really drove your body to its limit somehow.
It took you a while to be able to stand on your two feet again, but before the police left you could walk on your own just fine. Sam and Colby however still managed to help you out.
"Let's head back home." Sam whispered to you. You nodded slightly and tried to walk on your own, only to be held up by Colby.
"Don't force yourself right now. You need some rest." He said, taking you back to the car. Your face having a rush of blood because of the gesture.
"I... I can walk."
"Let us do this. Please. It's too much already that you fainted right when we weren't with you." Sam said, looking at you, your heart racing at the look of his blue eyes upon you. You gulped.
"...f..fine." You said, resting your head on Colby's chest, making him smile.
✮ ⋆ ˚。𖦹 ⋆。°✩
part two is up!! the link is in the beginning! <3
thanks for reading all the way! likes, comments and requests are much appreciated.
-nikkõ
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tiredsmashbros · 2 months ago
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SMG34: LIPBITE COMIC WIP UPDATE
oh boy... i know a bunch of folks are hyped for this comic... and boy oh boy are ya'll's prayers going to be heard... kind of... butt for the celebration milestone, and granted majority are from this comic, i thought it was best to give EVERYTHING that i have currently.
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starting off STRONG with what you freaks most want: the completed pages. andddd yep that's it that all that i have done LMAO. i've been fixated on my own smg4 oc: tsb, and during the end of my summer was unfortunately fucked over by some personal issues that fortunately got resolved last minute good grief the anxiety prevented me from drawing the gays sigh... aNYWAYS LINEART WIPS!!!!
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here are linearts i have completed / in the progress of!! want to aim like i did in the past by finishing up lineart first, and then speed through with color + minor rendering. the reason i have a few colored is to test out what it would look polished and my god... i have improved A LOT. THESE GAY PEOPLE GIVE POWER I AM NOT KIDDING BELIEVE ME IM NOT CRAY- anyways onto wip pages!
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jumpscare: tsb stickman sketches. oh yeah. this is how i sketch and i blame sensei eiichiro oda /j. and in case anyone is unable to understand it {i don't blame u LMAO}, smg4 wakes up from the dream and is startled to see mario by his bed. they have a short convo before mario leaves, and we get a job to smg4 in the bathroom trying to put up a brave face. until the moment he leaves he's stunned due to seeing smg3 at his front door. will i elaborate more on specifics or unwritten dialogue? NOPE! gotta keep secrets to make it even more enjoyable at the end!!
currently at 13 sketched pages total, but this is probably gonna be reaching towards 20-ish pages, surpassing part two, but it will depend on how i come up with how to end it. additionally to confirm there will be a PART FOUR / chapter 3, to end this story. my goal is to have it done before i finish my senior year, or at least during the summer after i graduate bc good lord who knows whats gonna happen.
and lastly, before i end this crazy update, SCRAPPED PAGESSS!!!!!
CONTENT WARNING : NSFW SKETCHES !!!! PLEASE LOOK AWAY IF YOU ARE A MINOR OR DON'T LIKE THIS TYPE OF STUFF!!!
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oh boy... dont draw comics while sleep-deprived at 6am... idek what i was even aiming with this ngl other than just for fun, but i scrapped it due to not being what i had in mind for the story. if it doesn't serve a purpose or narrative, its bye bye YEAH BYE BYE THIS IS THE CLOSEST NSFW UR GONNA GET FROM ME HAHAHAHAHA- i say that despite writing a nsfw jojo wattpad smh im only confident doing it in words good lord. btw not watermarking these bc i gen don't care since they're legit scrapped {left top part was kept and completed} so idk what to do with these. im just throwing it and walkin away
now to end with this update, i can hear your question, "when will this be done?" and to answer that question: i'm not entirely sure due to my heavy focus on my smg4 oc: tsb, but my best chance is postponing my oc lore a bit and complete this before november UOIYGJDSIUHJKDWSXYUGHJKCS but we shall have too see...
if you want to join the ping list comment on this post LMAO [click]
ignore below if you're not from the tsb birthday partydddjdhdhdjd
...
...
...
thurs: smg34 is canon in the tsb universe / au. though most of their encounters are platonic or best-friendy-way, they eventually express their feelings to one another and start dating 3/4’s way of the tsb storyline arc. tsb is a supporter of his friend's relationship and admires and takes inspiration from their relationship heavily to input his future love life. yearning to be in a similar position... to learn what is to really love someone... or what it's truly like to be loved...
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azulpitlane · 11 months ago
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boss' daughter I ln4
pairing: lando norris x brown!daughter reader summary: lando is down bad for zak brown's daughter but shes a little hard to get notes: I know this isn't pt 3 of my other mini series BUT i thought of this idea and had to do it immediately hehe, I really like this one masterlist
y/nbrown
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liked by landonorris, zbrownceo and 21,492 others
y/nbrown nyc living
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user i wanna see her at races shes so cute😭🫶
y/nbrown vegas! ill be there🤭 liked by landonorris
user help why's lando in his boss' daughter's likes
landonorris 🤩
user norizzzzz user is this him shooting his shot AHAHHA user NO LANDO SHES MINE
user IT GIRL
user landooo👀
y/bff/n pretty girl
y/nbrown love u babes
posted september 2023
y/nbrown
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liked by danielricciardo, landonorris and 19,384 others
y/nbrown college student by day, dj by night😝
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y/bff/n ur so unserious babe
y/nbrown i ate, the people loved me
landonorris as a retired dj maybe you can give me some inspiration to start again
user LANDO??? user he's crushing so hard OMFFFF user zak brown reading this: 🤨🤨
zbrownceo dont have too much fun!
y/nbrown 🫣 user such a dad reply lol
user y/n brown slaying once again
user so excited to see you back in the paddock soon🫶 liked by y/nbrown
danielricciardo you're perfect for him
y/nbrown who???
posted october 2023
y/nbrown
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liked by landonorris, danielricciardo and 30,341 others
y/nbrown vegas babyyy
tagged zbrownceo, danielricciardo, y/bff/n
view all comments
user gorgeous girl
danielricciardo finally reunited with my favorite brown
y/nbrown was too busy girlbossing sorry danielricciardo what a shame, there's someone who's been waiting to meet you... y/nbrown hm, i didn't meet anyone new🤷‍♀️ danielricciardo next race then user is daniel hinting that lando didn't meet his crush sjsjkskks user wait he hasn't EVEN MET HER?!?! user im guessing not, shes been pictured with other drivers but never lando
user here for landos comments
landonorris maybe you should come to a race where I'm not crashing😅
user norizz strikes again user its the fact that she never even replies and he's still trying HAHA user hes fr out here risking his seat for her just not to respond back
mclaren 🧡
user shes finally back in the paddock!!!
user im surprised she doesn't go to more gp's, her dad's literally the ceo of mclaren😭 user i think she's mentioned shes very busy with uni so her schedule usually never aligns with the races
posted november 2023
y/nbrown abu dhabi, UAE
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liked by landonorris, zbrownceo and 25,482 others
y/nbrown escaping cold new york weather
view all comments
user OMG shes gonna be at the gp again this weekend!!
user landos got one more chance to shoot his shot before the season ends😭
landonorris hope to see you at the paddock!
danielricciardo thanks for letting me borrow that $10 mil bro I owe you🤝 maxverstappen1 thanks for saving my cats out of that burning building, you're a true hero🤝 alex_albon thanks for paying off my whole family's debt mate🤝 carlossainz55 thanks for gifting me that mclaren, i love it mate🤝
user ALL THE DRIVERS IN HER COMMENTS IMDEAD
user his rizz was so bad they had to step in omg. user and she still hasn't acknowledged lando AHAH user a true girlboss, I love her
user i need to know what zak brown thinks off all of this😭
user next season of dts gonna be craZy
user everybodys focused on the comments and not at the fact that these lyrics sound a little sus...
posted november 2023
landonorris posted a story
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dannyyyy🤠 y/n wyaaa im in the mclaren garage rn
y/n aren't you suppose to be in umm idk YOUR OWN GARAGE?
dannyyyy🤠 yeah but I need to do something real quick so come
y/n does this have anything to do with lando?
dannyyyy🤠 maybe...
y/n im sorry but he's exactly why im not in the garage rn
dannyyyy🤠 WHAT WHY pls dont tell me I hyped him up just for you not be interested...
y/n im not NOT interested but he's my dad's driver danny this can get messy so fast and what if he doesn't approve
dannyyyy🤠 oh you americans and your dramatics hes already talked to your dad dummy
y/n wait really?
dannyyyy🤠 you really think he would PUBLICLY hit on his boss' daughter without asking first?
y/n idk never really thought about it
dannyyyy🤠 JUST COME DOWN HERE YOU MUPPET
landonorris
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liked by y/nbrown, danielricciardo and 830,391 others
landonorris didn't win the race, but i won her heart
tagged y/nbrown
view all comments
user FINALLY
y/nbrown cheeseball liked by landonorris
user HE ACTUALLY GOT HER
danielricciardo youre welcome
y/nbrown you pushed me in front of him then ran away...not the best wingman danielricciardo its not like landos rizz was gonna get you together🤷‍♂️ y/nbrown true landonorris hey! I wasn't that bad... y/nbrown whatever helps you sleep at night hun!
user y/n blink twice if you need help
y/nbrown blink blink landonorris 😔
user obsessed with y/n bullying lando in the comments
user I know I love them already
zbrownceo better take good care of her lando
landonorris sir yes sir🫡
user we can no longer make norizz jokes. sigh.
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notes: what did y'all think of this one? I loved making it🤸‍♀️
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arlertwhore · 5 months ago
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help - kate martin
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pairing: kate martin x fem! reader synopsis: kate, your girlfriend comes over while your sick and "helps" you feel better ;) warning(s): smut, fingering, spit play, nipple play, nipple sucking, kate is the sweetest and talks you through it. word count: 1.4k author note: never saw the hype about her, saw an edit, and then BAM! i'm hooked now
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Kate, your girlfriend, arrives as planned a couple of hours earlier, but now, you don't seem as cheerful and enthusiastic as yo u did over the phone. When she barges into your bedroom, exclaiming, "Daddy's Home!" to see you with your hoodie pulled over your head, surrounded by tissues and your comfort teddy on your bed, she pauses, thinking she's somehow messed up and you're going to break up with her even though she is literally the most perfect girlfriend in the world. Exemplified, she rushes over to your side of the bed and gently places a hand on your shoulder. "Y/N?" she asks hesitantly, "Is- did I-… are you okay?" Of course, Kate's asking how you are first. You smile at her lovingly, that smile you give her everytime you fall in-love just a little harder, and see her relax instantly. "I wish I could kiss you," you murmur weakly.
Kate furrows her naturally arched brows. "Wish?" she asks, a subtle smirk on her slightly parted lips as she leans in, blue eyes soft with intention. You jump up, holding her by her shoulders. "I dunno, something I ate, I think. I feel like crap now. I don't wanna pass it on to you, baby."
Kate's hands come up to her shoulders, interlacing with yours as she holds herself close to you. "I don't care," she whispers lovingly before leaning in and kissing you anyway. "It's worth it," she murmurs softly against your lips, her affection shining through.
When her hand comes to your cheek to draw you closer, she notices your warmth. "You're hot, babe," she remarks with concern. "Maybe it's this hoodie, let me help you."
You raise your arms and Kate takes it off, leaving you in your bra. "Why didn't you tell me you were sick? I would've stopped on the way here and picked you up something," she says, a mix of empathy and worry evident in her voice.
"Because I know you," you chuckle weakly, "You're gonna act like I'm dying and fuss over me and shit." "You mean, help?" she retorts playfully, and you roll your eyes. "Fine. Wanna help so bad, Martin?"
Her big hands come to your bare waist, drawing you close. "I do."
The way Kate speaks is so dreamy and enchanting. You can't help but fantasize she had just said that at your guys' wedding.
When you hop out of dreamland, you blink in surprise and realize you're currently straddling her lap as she sits back against the headboard, both hands on your ass, gently massaging it with care as she bores at your tits, still clad in your bra unabashedly. Due to your body temperature, they glisten in a soft sheen of sweat that highlights against your skin mesmerizingly.
And though Kate is staring at your body, touching it, and she looks enamored, when she comes up to meet your face, the look in her eye is glassier than moments ago, like your face is the ultimate gander.
"You're so pretty, gorgeous," she breathes, and the butterflies in your stomach flutter wildly, seemingly traveling to your pussy that flutters excitedly at the compliment, her touch, and her existence.
"Could you help me, Kate? Could you help me take my pants off?" you say in a peckish, sensual tone. "Anything," she whispers as she complies, turning you around on her lap and pulling them down in one desire driven go. You don't have to tell her what you need help with next. She unclasps your bra, leaving you fully naked. "What now?" she murmurs against your ear, her breath fanning it.
You catch her lips in a deep kiss, pulling her hands to your chest and letting her touch you there too. You feel her smile as she squeezes them gently, and with your still hands interlocked, she jiggles your tits in her hands. "Fingers," you moan, "I want your fingers." You plead eagerly.
It sends you into overdrive when Kate's lips come down to your neck, kissing and nibbling gently as her hand travels further south, down to your pussy, her free hand still on your tit as she teases your firm nipple gently. "Kate…" you drawl, "I'm so so wet for you, Kate, I can't wait any longer."
When she rubs your clit gently and rhetorically questions, "Are you? Couldn't tell." it's like your heart stops. Your head falls back onto her shoulder, and you moan loudly, close to her ear, which riles her up. She moves your hand to rest over her other shoulder, allowing her freer access to your nipple.
She starts sucking it as her middle finger slips into you smoothly, pushing into you like a piston and making all your slickness flow from your cunt onto the mattress below.
"Fuck, pretty, look at how messy you're being," Kate murmurs against your chest as she pumps into you, working you open slowly. "You like that? You like makin' a mess on my fingers?"
"Oh, fuck," you gasp as she speeds up. It takes all the power in you to not shut your legs and to answer her at the same time. "I do."
When her pointer finger enters you, the fullness makes your back arch up and off the bed with a heavy mewl. Kate's quick to hold you in place with her free hand pressing hard on your legs, trapping you, and with soft kisses to your jaw. "No, no, no, take it," she urges, "Open your legs again, baby, take it."
You comply, opening your legs again. When your mouth hangs open as you cry out, Kate gives you a small break and a reward for listening. She eases her fingers into your mouth, and you suck them eagerly, savoring your own taste and feeling pleasure build within you unbearably. Her other hand crooks your jaw down to meet hers in a kiss—or so you believe, until Kate isn't really kissing you, but tasting your spit instead, inadvertently your arousal.
After the exchange, she wets her fingers with her saliva and hurriedly places them back into your cunt, thrusting into you vigorously. Her touch is both intense and tender, igniting sensations that leave you whining for more. She drives deeper, then teasingly asks, "More? That good?" as she strokes the soft spot inside of you, causing your toes to curl and your lip to be bitten.
You nod fervently. "So good!" Your body responds eagerly, arching into her touch, craving more of the exquisite sensation she's delivering. The room fills with the sound of your moans, mixing with the rhythmic sounds of her movements.
Her touch is knowing; knowing exactly how to push you closer to the edge, exactly how to help, and exactly what gets you off. Your breath quickens, chest rising and falling rapidly as the arousal builds to its peak. Kate's gaze locks with yours, eyes lidded, mirroring the fire that burns within you.
"You're close?" Kate breathes, her voice throaty and husky.
You can only manage a breathless nod as pleasure consumes every inch of your being and her fingers continue their relentless rhythm, each thrust sending shocks of ecstasy through your body, pushing you closer to the peak of pleasure.
You feel the familiar tightness building in your core, a sign that release is imminent. Kate senses it too, her movements becoming more urgent, more determined. The tension in your muscles coils tighter, anticipation heightening as you teeter on the brink of ecstasy.
With a final deep thrust, Kate pushes you over the edge. Your whole body shudders with the intensity of your climax, pleasure washing over you in relentless phases. You cry out her name, your voice a mix of pleasure and gratitude as she talks you through it.
"Let it out, baby, just like that, yeahh, c'mon.." Collapsed against her, you feel her embrace, her touch soothing as you come down from the high. Your breaths slow, hearts pounding in unison as you savor the intimacy and connection you'd just shared.
"You feel any better, babe? Did that help?" Kate asked, her tone hopeful.
"Yeah, I think I've found the cure for what ails me," you quipped with a mischievous grin. "And what's that?" Kate inquired.
"Orgasms, Kate. Lots of orgasms," you replied playfully. MASTERLIST
AUTHOR NOTE #2: gosh kate kills me.. also, is that titties and beer photo like real? like FR? inbox me! i love reading them STILL.
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daemour · 7 months ago
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Pairing: roommate! San x f! yn
Word Count: 10,664
Warnings: cursing, alcohol consumption, smut warnings under cut
Genre: Angst, fluff, smut, f2l au, college au, M for mature audiences
Summary: As the resident fuckboy San's best friend, you're legally obligated to be his hype man. It's only fitting as you're one of the few who can resist his boyish charms. But when he's set his sights on someone you cannot stand, perhaps you need to dig a bit deeper into your feelings after all.
Smut Warnings: masturbation (f), voyeurism, sexual fantasies, oral (f), missionary, protected sex, very slight breast play, overstimulation, cowgirl, some cumplay, dirty dirty talk, fingering, slight body worship ig?, praise, I literally have no idea I wrote it at a time when I should've been in bed so lmk if I missed anything
-
this is for the jackson wang party fic collab finished with @mingsolo (hella good) @flurrys-creativity (Pygalgia, Effervescent, and Abience) and @sanjoongie (trouble) <3 I still have one more to go but we'll ignore that LMAOOOOO I added too much plot :') flurry was a dear and helped me sort out my thoughts and I managed to write 8k of it in one day lol.
hope u all enjoy and sorry I'm a professional yapper there's no shutting me up
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“Going out again?” you ask your best friend and flatmate, San, as he walks past where you’re seated at the kitchen counter, suffering through your essays.
“Yep,” San answers easily, popping the ‘p’ and leaning over to take a peek at your laptop screen. “You misspelt ‘dextrorotatory’, you wrote it as ‘dexrotatory’.”
As your eyes find the typo, you groan and plant your head on the table. “I give up,” you declare dramatically, “I’ll drop out and become a taxi driver.”
San laughs. “First of all, you can’t drive that well. Second of all, you’d make more money as a stripper.” He dodges your smack with ease. “Third, you’re smart and you’ll ace these like always. You’re just a little mentally constipated. Why don’t you join me tonight?”
You think about it for a minute. While you probably do need a break from staring at your laptop, you know how wild the parties San goes to can get from personal experience. And you don’t think it’s a good idea when it's the end of your semester and the final year of your master's program. You just can’t afford to do that. “I’ll pass this time,” you sigh. “Maybe after exam season.”
San hums. “All right. Make sure to take a break, though,” he reminds you, dropping a quick kiss on the top of your head. “See you later.”
He soon disappears out of the door and you turn your focus away from your best friend to your homework. You feel bad for whoever his new conquest will be at the party.
In your opinion, it’s best to keep San at arm’s length when it comes to a romantic relationship. Not that you like him, but you also don’t want to be another notch on his bedpost, and you most certainly do not want to ruin your eight-year-long friendship. It’s not hard to see that San isn’t interested in a long relationship, not right now at least.
You honestly find it amusing that so many girls and guys still throw themselves at him and then get upset when he doesn’t give them a second glance after the initial night. His reputation precedes him, especially in your small town, and yet there will always be a line out the door for him. You don’t even know how he knows so many people.
With a sigh, you clear out your thoughts and refocus on your organic chemistry work. You’re lucky your job offered to pay for your master's classes, but the workload is killing you inside. You’re incredibly happy you’re almost done, and with newfound motivation, you hunker down and start writing out your notes again.
It’s almost two in the morning when you finally yawn and start putting your books away, and it’s almost three when you hear the front door open and the sound of San stumbling into the shoe rack as he always does. “You’re home already, Sanah?”
“YN!” San stumbles his way into the bathroom where you’re combing your hair, wrapping his arms around you and tucking his flushed face into your neck. “You’re still up?”
You laugh, tapping him on the head with your brush. “Yes, but I’m about to go to bed. And you should too, you know.”
San groans, his hold on your waist tightening and his words slurring together. “I don’t wanna,” he whines, “the bed's too cold.”
You sigh fondly. This happens almost every time he drinks, and usually, that’s why he doesn’t drink too much when he’s by himself. He gets too cuddly with people and you’re usually the one to keep him from bedding everyone he sees.  You suppose he somehow didn’t end up with anyone in bed and he’s disappointed now. “Do you think you’ll ever ask to sleep with me nicely, or will you just settle for wrestle-cuddling me into my own bed?” you ask, rolling your eyes as San does not answer, just pulling you towards your room. “There’s my answer.”
You’re too used to his drunk antics and just let him move you around. It’s comforting in a way, that he’s comfortable enough around you to do this with you, and it makes your heart warm whenever he throws his arm around you and presses his face in your neck.
You’d never admit it, but it’s nights like this when you sleep the best. With his warm breath tickling your neck, you let your body relax and your eyes flutter shut.
-
“God, I’ve got a raging headache,” San groans when he sees you enter the kitchen with a mess of bed hair. “I went so crazy with the soju last night, I think I’m going to die.”
You laugh, reaching for the pot to make some oatmeal for him. “Don’t be so dramatic. Why did you even drink so much anyway? No bitches?”
San snorts but immediately whines from the sharp pain that probably shot through his skull. “You’re so mean to me! No, I got no bitches, but that was from my own choice anyway. I don’t want to fuck around anymore.”
Both your eyebrows raise into your hairline. “No? What changed things, hm? Finally decided your one true love is Byeol?” As if on cue, your shared cat meows and curls around your ankles, and you bend down to scratch behind her ears.
“Never had to decide that, we all know she’s the real number one in my life. No, I think I’m interested in someone.” You stop your petting of Byeol, who meows in protest and runs off to pout somewhere. “Come on, don’t act like you just saw a ghost.”
“Who?” is the only question that comes out of your mouth. Of course, San has had a crush before, but he’s never stopped screwing around unless he was actively dating that person. He’s a fuckboy, but he’s not a piece of shit at least. This is new.
“Lee Yeseul. I met her yesterday at the party, and she’s so sweet. She was so out of place at the party, and not in a mean way. She just…has such an aura around her.” San’s voice is soft even just talking about her and you get the feeling he’s being serious. “We’re meeting up for coffee today.”
“That’s…amazing, Sanah. I really hope it goes well for you,” you smile at him, pushing a bowl of oatmeal over to him. “Don’t forget to let me make a speech at your wedding.”
San chuckles, rolling his eyes at your jokes. “Yeah, yeah. Don’t you have study group today? Go there and stop bothering me.”
You ruffle his messy hair before planting a kiss on it and pinching his cheek. He blindly reaches around to smack at you but you dodge him easily, laughing as you head out to grab your keys. “See you later, Sanah. Have a good da-ate.”
San grumbles at you but ultimately returns to his food. You think you can hear him muttering about you being a pain in the ass and you smile to yourself. You don’t have the heart to tell him you know Lee Yeseul…and she’s a major bitch. You sincerely hope she’s sweet to San at least—he deserves the best. But you find her absolutely draining, especially with how often she talks about herself and doesn’t pay attention to anyone else ever. If she cries in your class one more time you think you might smack her yourself.
You still remember the time you had gotten a call that your grandfather had died, and after overhearing your conversation, instead of comforting you, she started talking about how “so many of my family members died in the past ten years.” Sure, maybe she was trying, but you’ve known about her antics enough that it was clear she just wanted to make it about her.
But if San likes her, who are you to interfere? He has a pretty good eye for who has a good personality so maybe Yeseul has changed. You’re not one to stop him. Not that you ever could. When he first started going out to party, you would tag along to make sure he wouldn’t make any bad decisions, but your efforts seldom paid off. You’re pretty sure he must be blessed since he somehow hadn’t pissed off anyone majorly enough to have them call a hit on him.
Shaking your head, you rid yourself of these thoughts and go to the library. There’s no use dwelling on it, the more you think about it, the worse your feeling about his crush on Yeseul gets. He’s a grown man, he doesn’t need you to parent him.
“Woah, who pissed in your cereal?” You should’ve known you wouldn’t be able to hide your bad mood from your study buddy, Hongjoong. Although you only see him for studying, you’re confident enough to call him your closest friend other than San. “Are you okay?”
You sigh, dropping your books on the table. It earns you a harsh ‘shh’ from the librarian which you apologise half-heartedly for. “Do you remember Yeseul? Lee Yeseul?”
Hongjoong’s brows raise high into his hairline. “The professional bitcher? What did she do now?”
“San’s into her, and with her personality, she’s probably loving the attention from the professional heartbreaker.” You groan, glaring at the cover of your organic chemistry textbook. “It’s none of my business if he cares for her, but damn, I wish he could’ve picked anyone else.”
Hongjoong hums, leaning forward and poking at the top of your head. “Look, you’ve been his friend for years. I think you have a bit more of a reason to poke your nose into his business than most. Give it a few weeks, and if it truly bothers you, then you can bring it up to San.”
You sigh. “Maybe.” You say nothing else on the topic and Hongjoong knows not to broach it anymore. Sometimes you wish he wasn’t so smart.
-
“YN, I didn’t know you knew Yeseul!” is the first thing San says to you one week after he returns from one of his many dates with her. “When I mentioned you being my roommate she told me you were in the same class as her.”
You wince to yourself as you take a long swig of your coffee. “Mmh, I didn’t think it was that relevant,” you say. You can practically hear Hongjoong rolling his eyes at your excuse. You know you should tell him your qualms about Yeseul, especially since the gross feeling in your gut has only gotten stronger. But you’re not sure you want to tread those waters. San’s sweet, but he’s loyal to a fault and probably wouldn’t like you talking badly about Yeseul.
San narrows his eyes, clearly suspicious but not willing to pry. “Well, maybe if we ever find you a date, we can go on a double date.” He moves on pretty quickly, though, walking over to lean over your shoulder and look at your laptop. “Still going on that paper?”
You hum, cracking your knuckles. “Yeah, it’s due tomorrow so I need to pump it out today and then get Hongjoong to look it over.” You lean back, letting your head rest on San’s torso as you yawn. “I can’t wait for this to be over so that I can graduate already.”
San laughs, leaning down to rest his chin on your head. “You’re smart. You can do this. And when you’re done, I’ll take you to a party and we can celebrate.”
You groan, shifting forward and putting your hands back on the keyboard. “Well, in that case, I should get back to writing this.” As you start typing again, you hear the buzzer ring and the warmth of San’s body leaves you as he goes to check who it is.
“Oh, hey, Yeseul! Come on up!” Your eyebrows raise into your hairline and your head snaps up. Why would Yeseul go to all this trouble of coming here? Didn’t they just see each other?
You close your eyes and take a couple of deep breaths before facing the dragon herself. You can hear the tell-tale sound of her voice pitched up to sound more sweet, although it’s grown to be grating on your ears. “Hi, Sannie,” she purrs and you have to refrain from retching. “I was on my way home but I realised it went right by your apartment so I figured I could come say hi. It doesn’t look like you’re too busy, right?”
“No, not at all,” San replies, and you hate how sweetly he talks to her. “YN is in too, she’s writing her final paper. Wanna say hi? She could probably use the distraction.”
No, I don’t need the distraction, is what you want to scream out, but your mother did not raise you like that although you wish she did. Instead, you just smile politely at the girl entering your kitchen. “Hello, Yeseul. Good to see you again.”
“Hey, YNie!” Her cheery nickname for you has your eye twitching. “How’s the paper going? I finished mine a few weeks ago so I’m home free. Just need to submit it.”
“That’s great, Yeseul,” you say, tone slightly more monotonous than you wanted it to be and San shoots you a look. “Hopefully you get a good grade on it.”
“Hey, would you want to join us for dinner?” San cuts in and you can already feel a headache starting to pulse behind your eyes. “I was going to order pizza since it’s my turn today and I’m not nearly as good of a cook as YN.”
“Oh, that would be lovely! I don’t mind whatever toppings,” Yeseul claps happily. The urge to punch her in the face increases bit by bit for you. San nods happily, stepping out into the living room to place the call. After a moment, Yeseul turns to you with puppy eyes and you brace yourself for whatever she has up her sleeve. “Could I trouble you for a glass of water, YNie?”
You try your best to keep your composure as you get up to fetch her a glass of water. She takes it without even a thank you and you decide you’d much rather die than deal with her any longer so you close your laptop with a sigh. “I’m actually meeting with a friend for dinner, but you definitely should stay and have fun,” you say, smiling as plausibly as you can. You do not have dinner plans but you’re sure you can figure it out.
When you go into your room, you’re drawing blanks. You’re still going out, but you’ll probably just end up calling a friend to complain. As you leave the room and grab your keys, San meets eyes with you and frowns. “Where are you going?”
“Ah, I promised to have dinner with a friend so I’m heading out. Enjoy your time with Yeseul, though.”
The furrow between San’s brows deepens. “But I already ordered the pizza.”
You laugh, shaking your head. “I can bring the leftovers tomorrow for lunch. Sorry, I just forgot to tell you, but I really have to go now. Bye!” Before he can say goodbye as well, you slip out the door. The suffocating feeling that is encompassing you lifts and you sigh in relief, but then you somehow feel worse at the idea of San and Yeseul having fun and giggling and cuddling.
You shake your head again, trying to clear your muddled thoughts before setting down to go find your dinner. Fast food was the easiest option, and you figured you could at least sit in your car and wallow in self-pity.
-
After you receive your order you park and pull out your phone, scrolling through your contacts. You don’t want to call your family because as much as you love them, they can be a bit over-protective and probably will offer to help you find a different apartment and that would be a bit dramatic. In the end, Hongjoong is probably the next best option.
He doesn't pick up immediately, and you’re just about to hang up when the phone crackles and Hongjoong’s voice comes through. “Why are you calling me?”
You can’t help but bark out a laugh at his disgruntled tone. “Hongjoong, it’s a perfectly reasonable hour to call, don’t blame me for your shit sleeping schedule. Are you actually free though?”
Hongjoong sighs and if you focus you can hear the sound of him rolling over in bed. “What’s up?”
“It’s about Yeseul again. She came around today, and it was just…so suffocating. Like, why did San have to pick her? There’s so many girls, and out of them all he picks her? The most bitchy one I know?”
Hongjoong hums. “Why does it annoy you so much?”
You groan, leaning your head back and taking a long sip of your drink. “She’s self-centred, bitchy, and she’s just so fake. I don’t think this relationship will end well, Joong. Clearly he’s just blinded and she’s so manipulative.”
“But why are you so bothered by this specifically? I mean, sure we’ve had bad interactions with Yeseul, but you’re pretty nonchalant about the shit San gets up to and you like to let him deal with the consequences himself.”
You frown glaring at the phone although you know he can’t see it and you pop a fry into your mouth. “I don’t know. It just feels different. I feel like I should interfere this time. I mean, he’s a lot more serious this go around.”
Hongjoong hums, rolling once again as he yawns. “YN, be totally honest with me. This is a shot in the dark, but I think this is pretty important.” You hold your breath in anticipation. “Do you like San?”
“Oh sure, he’s a good friend–”
“You and I both know that’s not what I meant.” You bite your lip, stiffening in your chair. “YN, you need to be honest with yourself. The way you talk about San, you interact with him, it’s not how just roommates, just friends interact. You kiss each other's heads, YN. And it can be platonic, but I’ve rarely seen San do that to his female friends, and I’ve never seen you do that, period. You don’t even kiss me.” His voice turns teasing on the last bit but you’re too shocked to register.
Do you like San? You love him like a friend, of course. But when you think about him being with anyone else, even if it wasn’t Yeseul, something in you aches. When you think about San’s smile being directed to anyone else, you can feel a burning in your gut. The answer is clear, whether you like it or not.
“I…yes. I do.” The confession comes out quietly. “But I don’t want to do anything about it. Like you said, it’s up to San whether he likes Yeseul enough. I can’t interfere.”
You can practically hear the look Hongjoong would be levelling at you. “Why not?”
You shrug. “When San likes someone, nothing can stop him from liking someone unless he wants to. I’ll just let it run its course and hopefully my own feelings will vanish in the process.”
“That doesn’t sound very healthy, YN.”
You let out a despondent laugh. “Sure, probably not. But who knows? Maybe I can find someone else in the process.” You let out a sigh before glancing at your now-cold sandwich. “I gotta head out, but thanks for talking, Joong. I’ll see you in class.”
Hongjoong can barely say goodbye before you hang up the phone and lean back. This is going to be difficult. The more you see Yeseul, the more you know you’ll accidentally slip up and something will tip her and San off. Your headache is pulsing behind your eyes and you take a small bite of your sandwich, your appetite diminishing. You miss being a child and your biggest worry is that San sneezed on your lollipop.
With another groan, you wrap up the sandwich and just go for a late-night drive instead to clear your head. It’s something that has never failed to calm you down and keep your mind level. San always berates you for driving alone at night, but you’d like to say you’re pretty safe. Plus, even he has agreed that it’s pretty calming when—you frown, forcing thoughts of San to leave your brain.
You don’t really know how long you’ve been out, but it’s surely long enough that Yeseul has left. As you carefully open the door, there’s a long silence, and you sigh, happy you made it home free. But as you’re about to call out for San, you hear a high-pitched moan come from his bedroom. And it certainly is not San.
You almost turn tail and head right back out of the apartment when you hear San’s reverberating moans fill the house. Against your better judgment, you take off your shoes and step closer towards his bedroom. His bedroom door is cracked open and curse him for putting his mirror right in view where you can see him leaning back on his bed, his lower half hidden off the edge of it and you can only see Yeseul’s knees.
And in your head, you know it’s wrong. But your heart is beating out of your chest and you can feel heat building in your core. And, well, you’ve always worn your heart on your sleeve. You keep yourself pressed against the wall, staring at the way the muscles in San’s neck strain and the way he moans with every snap of his hips. You’re sure your panties are soaked through by now, and your teeth sink into your lower lip to keep yourself quiet. The taste of copper enters your mouth but you couldn’t care less.
It’s only when San sits up, probably to fuck into Yeseul better and he disappears from the mirror that you rip yourself away and escape into your own room. Not another thought enters your brain as you strip your leggings and underwear off, flopping on your bed and closing your eyes as you let your hand trail down to press against your slick pussy. It doesn’t take long for you to sink your fingers into your sopping cunt, turning your head to bury your face into your pillow.
The guilt in the back of your mind is quickly sent away as you imagine San’s hands fucking you instead. He’s always had well-worn hands, and your brain fogs up as you imagine him leaning forward to mouth at your neck as he fucks you.
Your brain flips back and forth between the idea of him eating you out so well and fucking so many loads into you with his thick cock that your stomach swells and you whimper into your pillow as your core tightens and you come onto your fingers. You feel tears prick your eyes as you get up to wipe your hands of the cream coating your fingers and toss the tissue in the trash. You’re not sure how you’ll be able to face San or Yeseul again after that.
You can feel the shame burning inside of you and you close your eyes and cry yourself to sleep silently.
-
Waking up is disorienting, your eyes red-rimmed and your bottom lip raw and blood dried on it. You feel like death and you’re pretty sure you can’t attend class like this. You lean over and grab your phone, yawning as you send your professor a text with a weak excuse. You don’t really care how plausible it is, Professor Jeong usually is quite understanding so you don’t worry about that for too long. San had texted you an hour ago, asking if you had come home, and you choose not to answer it.
You can hear mumbling in the other room, probably Yeseul and San sharing goodbyes, when you hear the door shut behind her. Unlike you, she’s probably happy to go to class and tell all her friends about her night with the campus fuckboy.
It takes another thirty minutes for you to finally roll out of bed and put some lotion on your face, hoping for the traces of the questionable night you had to erase from your face. Once you’re satisfied with your appearance, you venture out into your living room where San is standing by the door. “When did you get back?” he asks without even turning around. “I texted you like, an hour ago.”
You shrug, avoiding his eyes as you move into the kitchen to find breakfast. “I only just woke up, San.”
Your roommate gives a short huff, following close behind you. “Don’t you have class? Yeseul just left so you could walk with her.”
You try not to roll your eyes at the idea of that. “I’m not feeling well so I don’t think I’ll go.” “You’re not feeling well?” San’s voice deepens in concern and as you grab a yoghurt, he places his hand atop your forehead. “You are feeling pretty warm.”
At his touch, too many memories of last night flood through your brain and you shake away his hand. “Yeah. I’ll just go lie down for a little. Have a good day.”
Before he can say anything else, or realise your suspicious behaviour, you dodge past him and head off back into your room to hide. “I left your pizza in the fridge,” he calls after you and you just grunt in thanks before barricading yourself in your room.
You lean against the door for a minute before you realise you didn’t even grab a spoon. Unwilling to go back out there, you’ve resigned yourself to licking it out of the container like a cat when you hear a gentle knock at the door.
“I got you a spoon,” San’s unsure voice filters through the wooden door, and you squeeze your eyes shut.
“Thanks, San,” you murmur, turning to open the door a crack and take the proffered utensil. “Sorry for being short with you.”
His lips quirk into a half-smile, a silent acceptance of your apology. “I get it. Just get some rest, YN.”
You close the door again, this time a warm heart in your chest mixing with the guilt you still feel in your gut. You’re not sure how on earth you’re going to get over your feelings for San.
-
Avoiding San goes well for the most part. You are in your finals week anyway, and you’re spending most of your time at the library or in class. Your college’s library stays open for 24 hours during the last week of school anyways so some nights you’ve just been staying there until morning. Hongjoong disapproves heavily but doesn’t say much about it and you appreciate his support either way.
Avoiding Yeseul proves much harder. She seems to always find her way to wherever you happen to be, interrupting you and Hongjoong’s study sessions with a perfect smile and narrowed eyes. You don’t know what she wants from you, and you aren’t pleased with her presence.
But one evening, you’re about to leave the library to have some dinner when she corners you. “YN, let’s talk,” she says in that sickeningly saccharine voice of hers, looping her arm into yours and pulling you down the street. “I have some things to ask you.”
Unwilling, you try to tug your arm out of her grasp, but the girl is stronger than you expected. She pulls you all the way to her dorm on campus, sitting you down on her leather couch. “What is your relationship with Choi San?”
Her question comes so suddenly you need a minute to register. To her credit, Yeseul waits patiently for you to gather your thoughts. “He’s my friend and roommate?” you say as truthfully as you can muster, although you know it’s an absolute lie, and judging from her expression, Yeseul doesn’t believe you either.
“Don’t take me as a fool, YN. The way he talks about you is undeniable.”
“That seems like something you should be talking to him about,” you say, attempting to get up from the couch but Yeseul just pushes you back down.
“I’ve tried. He just tells me there’s nothing to worry about and I don’t believe that,” Yeseul grits through her teeth.
And you have to give it to her. She did try to come to San about her worries. But the way she refuses to trust him grates on your nerves. He stopped his fuckboy activities to be with her, and yet she’s worried about you, one of the few girls who isn’t all over him at any moment. You arch a brow. “Do you not trust him?”
Yseul scoffs. “Of course not. He’s a fuckboy. But I like the status I get with him. I just don’t want to end up embarrassed.”
Well, that will be inevitable, you can’t help but think to yourself. No matter how much your relationship with San is strained, you’re not about to let Yeseul talk shit about him like he isn’t genuinely trying for her.
“That’s where you come into play,” Yeseul’s smirk turns sharp. “I’m going to call San. Ask him to choose between us. If he chooses you, then I want you to stay far, far away from him.”
You shrug. No matter the outcome, it’s not like you’re not already keeping your distance from San. In the end, you’ll just tell him to break up with her and let him deal with the chaos himself. “Go ahead,” bitch.
San picks up on the first ring. “Yeseul?” He’s cheery and your heart aches at the thought of Yeseul breaking his so easily. “What’s the occasion?”
“Hey, babe, I just have a quick question, and I need you to answer truthfully for me, okay?” At his pause, she takes that as a go-ahead. “Who would you pick? Me or YN.”
There’s a long silence on the phone. “Yeseul, we need to break up.”
Only one thing unites you and Yeseul in this moment, and it’s your shared confusion for San’s reaction. “What do you mean?” her voice turns panicked. “Isn’t that a little far?”
“You’ve been stuck on this, and I don’t know how much I have to reassure you, Yeseul. I haven’t even seen YN for the past two weeks. And she’s my closest friend. I’m not dropping her for a two-week relationship. I hope you have a good time, Yeseul.”
Before you can react at all, Yeseul screeches and points an accusing finger at you. “This is all your fault, YN!”
Your jaw drops at her absolute audacity. “My fault? What are you on? I was just trying to live peacefully when you dragged me into this plot ignoring my advice. I told you to talk to him, to just fucking trust him. God, you’re an idiot. And I’m going home.”
Without another word, you leave, still fuming over that interaction. Couldn’t she just have made the call without you? You’re happy you don’t have to do all the convincing for San to leave her, but that just complicates things for you. Would he really so easily drop Yeseul just for you? From what you’ve heard, he was practically head over heels for her.
With another sigh, you head back to the library. You need to finish that exam.
-
“Pens down, and turn in your exams,” you hear the professor call, and you don’t think you’ve ever gotten up so fast. You’re so, so fucking happy that you’ve finished your last year and now you’re free.
As soon as your professor accepts your paper you race out of the lecture hall, only stopped by the cafeteria when you hear someone call your name. Lee Juyeon, someone you’ve started growing closer to, waves you down. “Hey, YN, congrats on finishing!” he smiles at you and you can’t help but smile back, the giddiness contagious.
“Thanks! You too,” you say, pulling him into a hug. “It’s so nice to be done.” Practically nothing could dampen your mood, especially seeing Juyeon. He’s sweet, and you have an inkling he likes you. And you’re not opposed to it.
“It really is,” Juyeon agreed cheerfully. “Look, I have to go celebrate with my family, I just wanted to say hi. But hey…there’s this end of the year party on Saturday, and I was wondering if you wanted to go with me.”
And your suspicions were right. You think about it for a moment. You’re not the biggest party person, anyone knows that, but Juyeon is sweet and just what you need, so you accept eagerly. It doesn’t take long for the two of you to exchange numbers and for him to promise to send you more details before he runs off. And through your excitement, you know you still have to go meet with San who’s probably waiting for you just outside. He wanted to see you as soon as you finish your exams, and you didn’t have the heart to decline.
“Congratulations on finishing your last exam, YN!” San cheers as soon as you exit the college building. “I’m so proud of you!”
You’re too tired to complain when San sweeps you up into a hug, just letting yourself relax in his firm arms. After all this work, you think you’ll let yourself indulge in his affection. “Thanks, Sanah. I appreciate it.” You let your chin rest on his broad shoulder, closing your eyes and letting the exhaustion take over you. “Can I go to bed now?”
You hear him chuckle, the vibrations from his chest comforting you. “Yeah, yeah. We can celebrate later. Come on.”
He tugs you all the way to your apartment, dropping you on the couch and quickly curling right up next to you. You can’t bring yourself to care. “I’m proud of you,” he repeats into your hair as he tucks your head into his neck. Your eyes flutter shut.
When you reopen them, it’s bordering on evening. San is no longer wrapped around you, and you can hear him moving about in the kitchen. “San,” you call out, voice raspy from having just woken up. “What are you doing?”
“Ah, I’m making dinner,” he responds, his voice too warm for your liking, your heart beating just a little faster. “Come and eat.”
With a bit of difficulty, you rise from the couch and move to the kitchen, taking a seat at the counter. “Japchae? When did you learn how to cook this?”
San chuckles. “Wooyoung taught me the other day because he was bored. I figured it’d be a nice surprise for you after all your hard work.”
Your lips twitch, unsure if you should smile or pout. “That’s sweet. Thank you again, San.”
As you start eating the noodles (there’s a little too much sesame but you don’t have the heart to tell San that), San clears his throat. “So…I promised to take you to a party.”
You vaguely remember this conversation. “Ah, yeah. What did you have in mind?”
“There’s this end of the year party, it’s supposed to be the biggest one, hosted by Jackson Wang.”
“Ah–” you shake your head, eyes apologetic. “I promised someone else I’d go with them. I didn’t know that was the party you wanted to take me to. Maybe we can do something else on a different day?”
San’s lips turn downward the slightest bit. “That’s okay. There are other parties. Who invited you, by the way?” His tone is casual, and yet you still feel like you’re walking into the lion’s den.
“Ah, Lee Juyeon from college. I think he’s in Hongjoong’s philosophy department, but he’s a year behind. He’s cute so I figured I’d give it a try.”
“It’s a date?” Your brows furrow at the heaviness in San’s voice but you pay it no mind and nod. “I see. Well, have fun.”
The rest of the dinner is filled with silence, San picking at his food and you in no mood to try and dissect his mood. He takes your empty bowl and starts doing the dishes, and you mumble out a thank you before running back to your room. He’s clearly not willing to talk more and it’s best to give him space.
As you lay in bed, you can’t help but worry about what is so grating on his mind after you mentioned your date. You can’t think of anything that would cause him to be angry—as far as you’re aware he has no grudges against Lee Juyeon, much less met him. Shaking your head, you try and fall asleep. It’s best not to dwell on it, you can just ask him tomorrow.
-
It’s Saturday, and you’re in a foul mood. San hasn’t spoken to you in the four days leading up to the party, avoiding you like there’s no tomorrow. The only saving grace comes in the form of Juyeon’s excited texts, telling you all about his outfit for the party, and you respond with matching enthusiasm. When you meet with Juyeon in front of the large house where the party is held, the thought of San isn’t even on your mind. Instead, you just take Juyeon’s offered hand and follow him into the party.
You weave through the bodies, reaching the counter where shots are being passed around. “Want vodka or tequila?” Juyeon asks, his voice pitching higher to be heard over the bass. Without answering him, you just reach for the bottle of tequila, pouring the two of you shots. “Good choice,” Juyeon laughs, throwing his head back as he downs the alcohol, you following suit shortly.
“You know, I never pegged you for a college party fan,” you lean in, laughing. “Maybe I should hang out with you more.”
Juyeon chuckles, wrapping an arm around your waist. “Maybe you should. I know great party-throwers. Although I’ve heard you’ve been to your fair share, what being San’s friend and all.”
You shake your head, a smile on your face. “Maybe at first, but you know, organic chemistry isn’t an easy major to balance with a party life.”
Juyeon laughs loudly, bumping you with his hip. “I understand the pain. Philosophy falls into that category of majors too. Another shot?”
You take the second shot happily, letting the alcohol burn through your veins as you stumble alongside Juyeon’s wandering through the crowd. Whatever you’re doing is a blur, all you can focus on is Juyeon’s smile and his warm hand holding yours.
It feels like barely a moment has passed when Juyeon pulls you into a nearly empty room of couches, only a few other couples lingering in the corners. “I hope you’ve been enjoying yourself,” Juyeon starts, his eyes sparkling as he takes in your appearance. “It’s been fun hanging out.”
“I did too,” you agree with a small smile, looking up at him through your lashes.
He leans in, and you lean in, and your lips brush. It’s a sweet kiss, one that you lean into as Juyeon wraps his arms around your waist. It’s warm and you smile into it. And then a familiar face pops into your head. You wonder to yourself how San would kiss you, if he would do it as sweetly as Juyeon or if he would devour your lips like it was his last meal.
When Juyeon pulls away for air, you feel guilt burning in your stomach again. Why would you think of other men when Juyeon’s right here in front of you? As Juyeon leans in to kiss you again, you almost move back before a hand grips your shoulder and pulls you into a broad chest.
“Hey, man, I’m going to have to talk to YN if you don’t mind.” You’d recognise your best friend’s voice anywhere, and it only serves to fill you with annoyance. Sure, you weren’t as into Juyeon’s kisses as you expected, but it doesn’t mean you’re thrilled to be interrupted by the man who’s been ignoring you.
Juyeon takes one look at San, and something changes in his eyes. A mix of reluctance and acceptance, and with a short nod and smile towards you, he slips away from you. You turn to San, frowning at the sharpness in his narrowed eyes, not one you’re used to seeing or enjoy seeing. “Why would you kiss him?” he spits, and your annoyance grows with confusion being added to the mix.
“What do you mean, ‘why kiss him’? I told you, San, I was on a date. Why the fuck did you interrupt us?”
“I like you.” Those three words would be a dream for you to hear from his mouth…if you weren’t so pissed.
“No, fuck that. I do not need to hear that from you right now. Not when I was enjoying my night with Juyeon. What was confessing supposed to do for you, San? It’s too late now. I wanted to enjoy this party, and now I have to go apologise to Juyeon for you.” San opens his mouth to speak, but you shake your head, pushing him away from you.
You leave San standing by himself as you search for Juyeon, your mood immediately souring. Why would he fucking do this to you? You can feel tears burning your eyelids and you abandon your search for Juyeon, searching instead for some liquor to take away your embarrassment.
As you pour yourself another shot of tequila, you notice a familiar face, Hongjoong talking to a girl you recognise as someone he hangs out with sometimes. They look like they’re getting it on and you feel a little bad, but you need his advice. “Hey, Kim Hongjoong!” you call out to him, waving him over. Hongjoong’s eyes brighten and he makes his way over, leaving the girl staring after him longingly, but her attention is soon taken away by two other guys. You recognise one of them from the cafeteria but you don’t remember his name.
“Hey, YN, what’s up? I didn’t expect to see you here, did San take you?” Your face falls and Hongjoong realises he stepped into dangerous territory. “Okay, what happened?”
-
“I can’t believe San is mad at me for kissing someone at the party,” you groan after explaining to Hongjoong the events leading up to now. “Sure, maybe it wasn’t the best move on my part but he’s had like, twenty million one-night stands, and yet I can’t kiss someone else? He hasn’t even talked to me after I mentioned going on a date. And yet he looked positively murderous after he saw me kissing that other guy.”
Hongjoong tilts his head, confused. “Isn’t that what you wanted, though? You like him.”
“I did! I do! But I’m so sick of waiting around for him, and I could’ve had a chance at liking someone else. He’s all over the place, and I don’t know if that’s what I want in a man.” You’re lying to both Hongjoong and yourself, and Hongjoong knows it, raising an eyebrow.
“Honestly, YN, it just sounds like you need to talk to him.” Hongjoong crosses his arms, tapping his foot and eager to back to the girl was with, but also not wanting to ditch you in your time of need. You feel a little bad for pulling him away, but your mind is swirling with so many thoughts, you don’t know if you can sort them out by yourself and drinking to erase those thoughts is not something you like to do. You’re not San.
And speak of the devil, you smell his familiar cologne before his hand lands on your shoulder and pulls you into his chest. You whirl around out of his grip and glare at him. “Get off me,” you snap. “I’m in the middle of a conversation right now, Choi San.”
With one glance at Hongjoong, he raises his hands and winks at you. “Have that talk, YN. It’ll do you more good than harm.”
Oh, you’re going to kill that traitor after the party. You turn your attention back to San, your mouth twisted into a frown. “You make this quick or else.”
San has the decency to look a little ashamed as his eyes shake. “Can we talk on the patio? It’s too loud in here.”
With a dramatic sigh, you grab his wrist and pull him through the crowd to the back door, practically slamming it behind you. You can see the eyes of people interested in the drama through the windows but you pay it no mind. “Speak. You get five minutes before I go back in and you don’t talk to me again for the rest of the night.”
San’s face falls and his lips pull into a pout. But no matter how subconsciously adorable he is, you refuse to fall for his charms this time. The heat of anger is still curling in your gut when you think about the argument from earlier. “YN, come on, I had a good reason.”
You shake your head, ignoring the strands of hair that fall into your eyes. “No, San. Confessing to me is not a good reason to fuck up my night. You didn’t even apologise. You’ve been ignoring me for days after I mentioned my date, and the moment I kiss Juyeon you get all angry and jealous? Be for real.” You pause for breath, glaring daggers into his eyes. “You are not owed my time, especially after that shit you pulled. Yeseul’s jealousy is why you broke up with her, so why are you like this to me?”
San’s gaze intensifies and you can see him actively trying to reign in his temper. Although he does his best to remain calm, if tempers are rising, he can be intense. “YN, what was I supposed to do? Watch you go out with him? Watch you slip from my fingers just like that?”
“Yes!” you all but scream at him. “If I could sit by and let Yeseul take each little bit of your heart, you could’ve done the same! I was going to be happy, San! I wouldn’t have to sit behind and watch you from the sidelines with my heart slowly cracking. But I don’t get that same courtesy.”
You step forward, poking his chest with a finger as you let loose your storm of thoughts. In your anger, you don’t even notice San’s arm moving until it wraps around your waist and pulls you into him. The action shocks you enough that you stop mid-sentence, your finger still pressing into San’s flesh. “You love me?” San leans in, his nose brushing against yours.
You can feel heat flare up in your face as you stare wide-eyed at him. It takes you a moment to register your compromising position and you stumble back, pushing at his chest. “Don’t do that,” you hiss, turning your eyes away. “I don’t like you, San. Not anymore.”
“You’re lying.” San’s voice is firm. “Look at me in the eyes and tell me you don’t like me anymore.”
You don’t know where you got it from. You’ve never been good at lying, not to San. Maybe it was the alcohol burning through your system, mixing with the shame and anger you feel. But this time, you stare him directly in the eye and say the four words that might’ve been the biggest lie in your life. “I don’t like you.” San’s brows furrow and he shakes his head.
“No–”
“Yes, San. You cannot just waltz around and expect me to keep the patience I had for you. I’m sick of being pulled around like a puppet. Maybe at first you didn’t know. But refusing to give me space when I asked for it?” You shake your head, glancing back at the party. “I’m going back in. We can talk about the apartment lease later.”
Without glancing back, you re-enter the house. And maybe it hurts a little that he doesn’t go after you, but at this point, you’re too numb and all you want to do is go home and cry. But home is not an option, not when it would probably be the first place he would look for you. Fighting back the tears threatening to fall from your eyes, you slide into your car, staring blankly at the wheel for a long moment until you feel composed and sober enough to drive.
And drive you certainly do. You’re not quite sure where you’re going, and you’re plenty aware that this is a bad idea, but you just let yourself go around and calm yourself down first. The crisp breeze paired with the warm spring air does wonders to clear your head and paired with the late times, there are not too many cars out. It’s peaceful.
You’re not too sure how long you were out, but it’s long enough for the blurry memory of the argument to clear and you groan, pulling over to park by the side of the road and let your head hit the steering wheel. You went too far. San had always been the more emotional of you two, always wearing his heart on his sleeve. He must’ve had a hard time with Yeseul, and although it doesn’t excuse him, you never gave him a chance to properly apologise.
With a sigh, you check your phone to see five missed calls and twenty texts from San asking where you are. He somehow even got your neighbours (a sweet couple in their twenties who babysit Byeol sometimes) to ask you if you’re okay. As your finger hovers over the call button, debating whether to call him back, bright headlights shine behind your car and you stiffen. Your hand hovers over the pepper spray you keep in the dash as you press the call button in a panic. No matter what the disagreement was about, you know San would still come to your aid if you needed it.
“YN, open the door. I’ve been worried sick!” San’s voice crackles through the receiver and you spin around in your seat, squinting at the figure standing behind your car and your shoulders sag in relief.
“God, San, you scared the shit out of me!” you scold, leaning over to unlock the passenger seat and push the door open while hanging up the call. “Get in here.”
A haggard-looking San slides in, his eyes red-rimmed and mouth pressed into a thin line. The car that drove him turns and you look back in confusion before San starts explaining. “I wanted to give you space so I stayed at the party,” he starts explaining after a moment. “But I got worried and went to the apartment to find you. But you weren’t there, and I asked all your friends. I’m lucky you left your location on, and my friend gave me a ride.”
You wince. You forgot about turning off your location, although you’re glad you didn’t as it would’ve been more dangerous otherwise. “I’m sorry,” you mumble, turning your eyes to look out the windshield. “I just needed to clear my head so I went for a drive.”
There’s a long period of suffocating silence between the two of you when San finally speaks, his voice quiet. “I’m sorry,” he starts and your head snaps towards him, eyes wide. Of all the things you expected to fall from his lips, an apology is not one of those things. Not tonight, at least. “I was too pushy. I shouldn’t have ignored you, or interrupted your time with Juyeon. I should’ve talked to you like an adult.”
You laugh, resting your head on the steering wheel. “What an astute observation, San. However did you come to that conclusion?” Your exasperation is evident in your tone and San sucks in a breath at how done you seem. “Look, San. I’m sure you didn’t mean it to be that bad. But I’m just…tired. I’m tired of always wondering what is running through your mind, where I am in your list of importance. You date Yeseul, but break up with her over me. You give me the cold shoulder when I go on a date, but suddenly me being on a date is unacceptable. I just don’t know how to take anything.”
Against your will, tears start to drop onto your thighs, streaking down the skin and you sniff. “Shit,” San panics beside you. “I didn’t mean to make you cry.” He hands you a tissue and you take it with shaking hands, pressing your face into it as San tugs you closer, guiding you to lean against him.
He repeats soft little ‘sorry’s and leans his head atop yours, his tears falling onto your hair. The two of you stay in this position for a long while, no words are needed to understand the emotional moment.
“Let’s go home, YN,” San mumbles, his voice vibrating deep in your heart. “Let’s go home and we can talk tomorrow.”
You sniff again, tears run dry as you sit up and wipe your eyes. “Okay,” you whisper out. “Let’s go home.”
San stays attached to you throughout the drive home, his hand gripping onto your own hand whenever he can, and quickly wrapping you into a back hug as you walk up to the apartment. “I…cuddle with me tonight?” you ask, eyes flitting away from his face, missing the brilliant smile that spreads across it.
“I wouldn’t have it any other way,” he hums, walking with you to his room, and he lets you slide in first, the smell of his detergent filling your mind and your eyelids flutter shut already. San crawls in next to you, pulling you close.
“Good night, YN,” San mumbles as your breathing evens out. As you drift off into sleep, you swear you feel his soft lips on your forehead but you dismiss it as wishful thinking.
-
When you reawaken, San’s still curled up, your body covered by his, his breathing slow and gentle. You can’t help but blink a couple of times to make sure it isn’t a dream when his arms tighten around your waist and he shifts. “YN?” His morning voice is as rough as always, rumbling low in his chest.
“Hey, Sanah,” you greet him quietly, leaning up to meet his eyes blinking slowly at you like a cat’s. “Good morning.”
“Hi.” He dips his head to nuzzle into your neck, breathing in your scent. “I should probably explain myself.” His voice vibrates against your neck and you giggle softly at the ticklish feeling.
“That would be nice.”
San huffs, but he can’t complain about your snark. “I like you, YN. I don’t know when I started to, and I definitely didn’t realise I did until I started dating Yeseul. I did like her, but not as deeply as I thought I did. It was so easy to break up with her as soon as she made me pick between you and her. The answer came to me without a doubt in my mind as soon as the question left her lips, and yet I still didn’t realise my true feelings.” He laughs self-deprecatingly, and you stroke his hair comfortingly. “I didn’t realise why I was so pissed about you going out with Juyeon, and that’s why I was avoiding you. It’s a stupid reason, I know. But I just didn’t know why, not until I saw you at the party kissing him. I just wanted to be there instead of you. And I’m sorry, and I understand if you don’t like me anymore, but–”
“I love you.”
His head snaps up to stare at you after your sudden declaration, and after he registers your words a smile spreads across his face. He puffs out a breathy chuckle and you know his answer before he even says it. “I love you too.”
His eyes shine like you’ve hung the stars in the skies, and when they flit down to your lips, you know an unspoken question when you see it. You lean forward slowly, letting your eyes close once more when your lips meet his.
And damn, you were right about how San kisses. In a second, he deepens the kiss, bringing his hands up to cup your face while his tongue swipes at your lips. Shyly, you part your lips and he dives right in, licking into your mouth and biting at your lips.
“Sanah,” you gasp into his mouth, the sound swallowed by his plush lips. “Sanah–”
You repeat his name like a prayer as his lips travel down to your neck, littering wet kisses and bite marks all over your sensitive skin. “Fuck, baby, you’re so sweet to me,” San moans against your body. “Please, please, let me treat you right, make it up to you. Let me worship you.”
You whine as he laves his tongue over your breasts spilling out of the crop top you had worn last night. Any other time you would’ve stressed at how gross the clothes were but right now you could hardly even think about it. “Fuck, yes, please,” you beg when San nips at your cleavage, leaving a mark.
“Ah, already begging for me,” San groans, his hips pressing into your legs. “You’re so perfect.” His voice grows whiney as his sucks on your nipples, making your back arch.
His kisses move down your body until his breath is ghosting over your stomach and his hands are pawing at your pants, shoving them down as quickly as he can. He doesn’t have the same amount of minimal patience for your panties, and before you can react, he’s ripped them off your legs. “Choi San!” you scold, shifting to try and sit up but his grip on your hips stops you from moving too far.
“I’ll buy you a new pair,” San promises before diving right in and sucking at your clit without another moment’s hesitation. Your hips jerk and your core tightens at the sudden feeling as you throw your head back and moan so loudly it’s bordering on a scream
His ministrations on your dripping cunt have you wordless. His fingers are pressing into your hip bones, the sensation making you squirm. As soon as his tongue breaches your clenching hole your hands fly down to grasp at his hair. “Fuck–” you squeal, your legs attempting to close but San just pushes them apart again, busying himself in your folds.
“Fuck, you taste so good,” San groans, the vibrations sending shivers up your spine as he lets his teeth scrape against your clit. You can hardly focus on anything at the barrage of sensations filling you up, San fucking his tongue into you so well. Your thighs are shaking as you can feel yourself grow wetter and wetter against his face.
When you tilt your head down, he meets your eyes as he moves one of his hands to push a finger into your hole. “Shit–” your grip on his hair tightens impossibly. “Sanah–”
“Come for me, love,” San groans, and you let the dam break, screaming out his name until your voice is hoarse, and San licks up your release through it all.
When he finally pulls away from your twitching and sensitive core, his lips are covered in your glistening slick, thick globs of it sitting pretty on his chin. Without thinking, you pull him down and crash your lips against his, tasting yourself on his tongue. San groans as you lick his face clean, shoving your tongue deep into his mouth.
“Fuck, I need to fuck you right now or else I think I might go insane,” San growls, blindly fumbling in his nightstand to pull out a condom as he shoves down his sweats to reveal his hard, red cock. Without another thought, he opens the pack with his teeth, rolling the latex down his length with ease thanks to the precum dribbling down it.
He lines up, the tip of it kissing your hole, when you groan. You’re much too impatient for this, reaching down and holding him steady as you shift your body to sink onto his thick cock. “Shit, YN,” San grits out as you take him deeper and deeper until your cunt kisses his crotch. “You’re too much.”
You pant, shifting on his cock as you try to get used to the stretch. He’s not the longest you’ve had, but he’s thick and the stretch is almost too much. “You’re fucking talking, you fill me up so fucking well, Sanah.” You hiss as you throw your head back, the stinging melting into pleasure. “Fuck me already, San. Or should I go and find Juyeon to–”
You’re cut off by San thrusting into you so violently that you swear the bed shakes. “I don’t want to hear that fucking name out of your mouth anymore,” San commands, leaning forward until his body weight pins you down and your eyes roll back as he starts fucking into you with short, quick thrusts.
With every movement, you feel like you may break apart. You can hear every slick sound, the sound of it obscene, and yet all you want is more. Your previous release coats his cock so well, thick strings of it attaching to his hips.
His arms wrap around your waist, and before you can protest or do anything, he hoists you up until you’re sitting in his lap. You swear this angle makes him impale you even deeper, his cockhead kissing the perfect spot deep inside you. Your head drops to San’s shoulder, moaning against the fabric of his shirt. “Fuck, San, you’re so deep,” you moan high-pitched. “You’re so fucking good for me.”
San growls, pressing a kiss behind your ear. “You’re so tight for me, so much better than Yeseul. I saw you in the mirror, you know,” he whispers conspiratorially and you gasp and clench, snapping your head to look at him. “You’re not as sneaky as you thought, love. Did you touch yourself to the thought of me fucking you so well?”
You whine, words failing you, and San’s hips slow to a stop. You try your best to grind against him but his hands grip your waist, keeping you still. “Please–” you try to beg but San chuckles and nips at your earlobe.
“Answer me, YN.”
“Fuck– Yes!” you cry out, so eager for him to start moving again. “Wanted you to fill me with your cum so well until it was spilling out of me. Please, please, please, fuck me.”
“Hm.” And without any warning, San jerks his hips up into you, biting into your neck like a fucking vampire and you scream, hips stuttering as you come on his cock. You don’t think you’re making any coherent noises, just babbling into his neck as your bones become jelly from the overstimulation.
If you thought the sounds were obscene before, you swear they’ve become ten times worse as you lay limp against San’s body. He’s moving you up and down his cock like a doll and you pant, squeezing your eyes shut as you still feel aftershocks from your orgasm.
“Shit, you’re so warm around me, I’m gonna come,” San moans in your ear, his rhythm breaking as he drops your weight on his cock. You can feel him twitching inside you as his teeth sink into your neck once more. “God, I want to fill you up so badly, but that’s just going to have to wait, my love.”
After a long moment, he pulls out, groaning at your come coating the condom and his thighs. Without thinking, he dips his fingers in the mess and brings it to his mouth, licking it off like it’s the most delicious thing in the world to him. “Come here, baby,” he says in that beautifully raspy voice, and you lean forward, meeting his lips in another kiss.
This kiss is sweet and soft, but the lingering taste of your shared releases still permeates your taste buds. You sigh, leaning your head against his shoulder as he lays against the wall with you in his arms.
“I’m sorry,” he apologises again, pressing another kiss to the top of your head and it’s almost like he hadn’t fucked you like it was your last day on earth. “I won’t ever leave you again.”
You hum, turning your head to pepper kisses over his neck freckles. “I should be the one saying that. I love you, San. And I’ll always run to you with no hesitation.”
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