#as she was talking about that in my head just flashed that one lawyer who wrote his entire briefing or whatever with chatgpt

[coldbug]

yeah tho the lady was like…

“well ai is here to stay, so all of your arguments against it don’t matter” and was saying shit about how like. it’s a powerful tool and wouldn’t you rather it be in the hands of the masses than the oppressors? i want ai to have my values, not the koch brother’s values

i’m sitting there like BITCHHH. who do you think is training the ai????? funding the ai??? whose biases do you think the ai has??? please be a little less fucking oblivious and dumb? ai ISNT your friend. ai Doesn’t have “your values” (ai doesn’t have values at all girl it’s not fucking intelligent it’s literally applied statistics 🙃)

it was so painful

[kinda-super-hot]

I Want More. (1)

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3

Pairing: Harvey Specter x F!Lawyer!Reader - friends to enemies to lovers <3

Summary: This will be a series! Part 1: (Y/n) and Harvey were 'together' during their time at Harvard, but Harvey couldn't commit to an actual relationship. They 'break-up', or whatever you do to end a situationship, and split on bad terms. Years later, after they become successful lawyers, their paths collide once again when (Y/n) takes a job at Pearson Hardman.

Warnings: commitment issues, angst, arguing - I think that's it but if you noticed something I missed, please let me know.

Word Count: 1784

A/N: I haven't written in a WHILE. Please, please, please constructive criticism. Also, there's, like, no Harvey fanfics. I think I read literally all of them soooooo... that's why there's this thing. Anyways, lemme know if you're interested in part 2 (I already started writing lol).

Harvey and I didn’t used to be so distant. Once upon a time, while we were both attending Harvard, I was the person he went to practice flash cards to study for the bar. While I sat against my bed frame asking him questions off the cards, he’d lay on his stomach with his feet in the air. Seeing as we were both quick witted, we’d often get distracted and end with a battle of lighthearted jabs.

               And likewise, he was there for me when I had been stood up on a date with some frat boy. He ordered in some Chinese food and pulled a big tub of ice-cream out of my freezer. We sat on my goodwill couch picking apart the guy and making up some dumb unfathomable story as to why he hadn’t texted.

               “I can’t wait to hear the headline in the morning: Duke, whatever the hell his last name was, found having been thrown from his car in a head on collision right into a semi-truck loaded with rubber ducks.” He did a news reporter voice that didn’t sound far off from how he normally talked. “Luckily, the ducks cushioned his fall, so he only suffered having lost his phone and missing out on the opportunity of a lifetime with the (Y/N) (L/N).” I repress my giggle but can’t stop the goofy smile on my face. “What a loss.”

               “I mean,” I spoon more ice-cream into my mouth, “Who would name their son Duke? You can tell they wanted a dog.” He nodded along to that and all the other ridiculous things we talked about that night.

               But some friendships don’t last forever. Especially, when you want more.

               We grew closer and had fleeting kisses often. Some borderline dates, but never anything serious. Never anything real. Not to him.

               “Harv.” I called his name from the couch after I heard the door to his apartment open and close. He walked through the door with a smile on his face. “How was your day?” I asked, but I already knew the answer just by looking at his face. He had a mock trial set that day and absolutely crushed it. He was assigned the husband’s attorney and was in charge of making sure that the wife got the minimum of what she was entitled to without having signed a prenup.

               After he boasted about his triumph, I applauded him. But he wasn’t finished running his big mouth. And his next, one little comment, threw our relationship through a loop. “One of the stupidest things a person can do is get married.” He smirked as he took of his jacket and started on his tie.

               I froze in my place on the couch. He continued getting comfortable and taking off his restricting clothes with his back facing me. My throat was tight, but I persevered, I had to make sure that I had heard him right. “You think marriage is stupid?”

               I eyed his back feeling distraught. Every fiber in my being hoped and pleaded that he was joking, but my gut knew better. Moreso, it knew Harvey better.

               “Marriage, in my eyes, is an irrational vulnerability. There’s no point other than, I don’t know, taxes?” He rambles on with his back still facing me. My heart clenches. “And even then, it’s not worth it. Divorce can ruin everything. A man, his family, hell, it can run an entire business into the ground.”

               My head was throbbing, and I couldn’t help the hot tears that brim my eyes. “Huh.” I acknowledge. My voice feels raw already from holding back letting out any noises. “I didn’t know you felt that way.”

               My voice must have given me away because Harvey flicks his head over his shoulder to spare me a glance before double taking. His eyes widen and his body tenses. He turned his body to me and takes a step in my direction before stopping in his tracks. A tear falls down my cheek and I feel burning hot embarrassment in my chest.

               “Honey…” He gently grabs me by my biceps and looks into my eyes. “What’s wrong.” His voice is smooth as he caresses my cheek and pulls my face into his chest. I let out a choked cry and he rocks me back and forth for a few moments.

               I feel ridiculous. “Oh, it’s nothing.” I can tell I’m not being convincing when Harvey pulls my face from his chest and gives that knowing look before putting it right back where it belongs.

               I had no idea what to say. How do you tell your kind-of-but-not-really-boyfriend that you had already planned what the centerpieces at your wedding would look like? That this was it. This was everything you wanted. He was everything you wanted.

               “Even if it was me?” I blurted it out before I could really think about what I was saying. He looked confused for a second but then his face went stern.

               “Y/N.” All of a sudden, his delicate touch is a little heavier. “We’re not even-…” He cuts himself off and looks to the corner of the room. My mouth opened as I processed what he was too scared to say.    

               “You don’t want me.” My expression turned icy and I looked down. He let out a frustrated noise and pulled away from me. Though, I felt empty before he could even begin to move from my embrace.

               “That’s not it.” His brows were furrowed, and he wouldn’t look at me. That’s exactly it. I read his face and could feel he was holding something back. I was at a loss for words. I removed my body from the bed and let out an emotional scoff.

               I speedily walked into the bathroom, trying to make a plan. Any plan that won’t leave me anymore heartbroken than I already was.

Leave.

               It was my only option. I eyed the unused, small garbage bag next to the toilet and ripped it from its basket. “Y’know,” I suddenly felt his presence behind me. “I know you’re studying to be a lawyer and their whole schtick is lying and-” I started tossing my deodorant and face wash and every other thing I bought for his place into the bag. “-and withholding the truth.” I ranted in a demeaning voice. “But I didn’t think you would do that to me-”

               “What the hell are you talking about?” His voice was raised and his hands were out to his side in an exasperated way. “I didn’t lie!” I didn’t stop tossing things in, in fact I’d finished my bathroom segment and moved on to his closet.

               “You’re right- you didn’t lie, you just kissed me, went on dates, and cuddled me! But, oh no, you’re right. We’re not anything.” I growled as I tossed my spare shirts and pants from his closet onto the bed before stuffing them in my already bulging, see-through bag.

               He didn’t yell, but he did have an icy tone when saying, “It’s not my fault if you convinced yourself there was something here when there wasn’t.” I stopped trying to make everything fit into the bag. The next few seconds were silent as I let his words sink in. My heart had to have gotten heavier because it felt like it was in my gut. Either that, or I was about to vomit.

               All I could think was ‘get out’. I couldn’t look at him, fuck, my heart hurts so bad. I tie off the bag and walked from his bedroom into the living room and finally, slam his front door. I couldn’t help but stop outside of it to try and listen for footsteps… but I heard none.

               So, I left. For the next few days, I spent my hours crying, sleeping, crying again and completely and utterly alone.

               I hardly saw Harvey again whilst I was at Harvard, thank God we were in different law classes. Of course, with an ego as big as his, it was impossible not to at least hear about him every once and a while. During graduation, I grimaced knowing that he was a few feet away with that million-dollar smile on his face. Never the matter, I put a smile on my face too and high-tailed it when the picture was over.

I moved back to the city I was born and raised, not too far from New York. I practiced as an associate for a while, but quickly climbed the ranks and made Junior Partner at the firm. I had mind blowing reviews and an amazing success rate that assured a job offer at whatever firm would have me. In fact, I worked so hard at my firm, that I reached the capacity of what they could pay me as a Junior Partner. I could either become Senior Partner or go somewhere else if I wanted to continue to grow my paycheck.

               And if I learned anything from Harvey Douchebag Specter, it’s that I should never settle. I set my eyes on the most successful firm in New York: Pearson Hardman. One over the phone interview and a quick glance at my numerous 5-star reviews, recommendations, and success rate-and I was welcomed to the Pearson Hardman family.

I rented an apartment not too far from the firm and began unpacking the few things I had. After paying off my student debt, I went on a spending spree, and I wound up with more than I could manage. After being knees deep in Dior, I had to offload some stuff. I packed everything I couldn’t part with and donated everything else to be distributed to a few women’s shelter. They couldn’t contain their excitement and now I’m a part of the state-wide organization. Funny enough how those things happen!

Either way, it was a fresh start, through and through. I had the bare necessities, and I was content. A shopping spree for some Ikea furniture was calling my name, though. The apartment was a literal husk up and would remain that way until I could find the time to go shopping.

Being in the city where I studied law and had some of the toughest years of my life made me emotional, but in the best way. Now I’m back, and at least 3 times as kick-ass as before.

Of course, since Harvard, I’d heard a comment or two about Harvey and what he’s been up to, but I tended to butt my head out, far away from his business. I’m sure he’s somewhere still in New York, I mean, he loved this city- but New York’s huge! There’s no way I’ll be seeing him anytime soon.

[storiesaplenty]

The Lawyer & the Cop (18+)

Carl Gallagher x f/Reader

Miscellaneous Masterlist

Main Masterlist

Just like all my other stories, this has not been proofread, but please enjoy.

Warnings: p in v sex. Oral (m& f receiving) fingering. Cum swallowing. Mention of anal, riding, cum on face.

WC : 2067

©️ storiesaplenty 2024: do not repost or translate my work. This is the only place I post my work.

Summary: Officer Carl is at the courthouse for trial, when he runs into his old crush, who is now a lawyer. He can't get her out of his head, & they end up getting to know one another again, even more so in an intimate way.

"Well, well, well, if it isn't Carl Gallagher."

I turned around at the sound of someone saying my name.

I was stunned to see her standing there. I haven't seen her since I was sent off to juvie back in middle school.

I looked her up and down quickly, and fuck she looks good. I always had a crush on her, and I was going to ask her out when I got out, but she moved away.

"Or should I say Officer Gallagher." She emphasized the word officer.

"Been along time." Was all I said with a soft smile, which she returned.

"It has been." She was about to say something else, but her name was being called.

"I gotta go. Maybe I'll see you around Carl." She said as she turned around and walked towards a small group of people.

"Who was that?" My partner asked me.

I told him her first name. "We used to school together. She moved when we were in middle school."

What I didn't say was that she was also my crush growing up.

I always had a soft spot for her. I never once inflicted any type of pain on her like I did our other classmates.

When I heard her and her family moved away, I became even more angry, but then I realised that she got out of the South Side and could make a name for herself, and I see that she has.

I saw her the next time I had to come to court and testify.

"Are you still stalking me after all these years Carl?" She teased as I sat down next to her on the bench.

"I didn't stalk you."

Yes I did. Her window was ont the first floor of her house. Of course I would be outside, watching her window to see if I could see her, but she always had the blinds closed.

"So that wasn't you watching me do homework in my bedroom?"

I sighed and turned my body so I was facing her. "I was young and stupid, and I had a massive crush on you, and." I cut myself off when she placed her hand on my knee.

"I know you did Carl. I had a crush on you as well."

I was taken back by that. "Wait, what?"

"I did Carl. Fuck, I was going to say something to you but then you went to juvie and then we moved in with my Aunt."

We were interrupted once again by her colleagues, and she gave me a smile to indicate how sorry she was for leaving once more.

She was a mere few feet away from and she dropped something on the floor, and bent down to pick it up.

My eyes zoned in on her ass as she bent over. I felt my cock twitch in my uniform pants as I wanted to do nothing more than bury my face between her thighs and let her fall apart with my mouth and fingers.

◆

I jerked myself to images of her that night and the next morning. Even as I drove around, doing my job I would get flashes of what I thought about.

Her on her knees looking up at me, with her face covered in my cum.

Her screaming out my name as I fuck her into my mattress.

Her riding me, her tits bouncing as I bury my face between her tits.

Sinking into her ass, as she whimpers out how big I am.

It was a long few shifts, that is for certain.

I was certain I would not be seeing her for some time, until I was called back to court again.

The original jury was found to be talking about what was happening in court, and they had to be scrapped and get a whole new jury section.

I walked into the court house, ready to get this done and over with, when I got told that we would be starting late.

I was frustrated beyond belief, already not having a good day.

Besides being sexually frustrated, I woke up late today.

Then I was given the wrong coffee order and I dropped my breakfast sandwich on the ground.

But that all seemed to wash away when I saw her walking towards me.

She was wearing a pencil skirt, and what I came only assume is a silk blouse, and wearing heels.

She looked every bit of a professional lawyer that she was, and I wanted to ruin her.

I walked towards her with purposeful steps, and she looked up from her phone as she must have heard my footsteps.

She smiled when she saw me.

"Hello Carl."

"How much time do you have until you have to be in court?" I asked her, not even bothering to say hello.

"Not for another 40 minutes or so, why?"

I didn't answer her, I leaned in and kissed her, expecting for her to pull back and slap me, but no, she didn't.

She deepened the kiss just a bit, then she pulled back once she realized where we were. We both looked around, but no one was really paying attention to us.

"I'll meet you in the family washroom in five minutes, on the second floor." That one is hardly used.

I walked up the stairs, not knowing if she would be meeting me there or not, but I have to take a chance.

◆

I looked at my watch and she had thirty seconds to come in before I leave, disappointed. The door swung open and there she was.

She came in and locked the door behind her.

I closed the small gap between our two bodies, crashing my lips against hers, the two of us moaning into the kiss.

She instantly wrapped her arms around my neck, pulling me even closer to her body, if that was even possible.

My hands were running up and down her body, and then I stopped at her skirt.

I bunched her skirt up and moved her panties to the side and with one nod of her head, I inserted one finger. I slapped my other hand on the door next to her head as she whimpered.

I inserted another finger, making her gasp into our kiss. I pulled my face back just a bit, but keeping our lips almost touching as I started to slowly thrust my fingers in and out of her wet pussy.

I watched her face to see if was doing what she liked. Her hand was gripping my shoulders, her eyes are closed and her mouth is hanging open.

"Carl I need you." She moaned.

"I'm right here baby." I growled out, not being able to help it as I finally got to hear my name fall from her lips in pleasure.

"Not much time." She gasped out as I picked up my pace as I continued to finger her.

I pulled my fingers out and told her to watch me. I placed the fingers on my tongue, moaning at the taste of her as I sucked my fingers clean.

She grabbed the sides of my head and kissed me, hard.

The two of us moaning into the kiss as I unbuckled my pants, as the two of us turned around for her to lean against the sink.

I turned her around as I pulled my dick out of my pants.

"No condom." I was frantic once I realized I didn't have one on me. Her and I made eye contact in the mirror as she leaned over.

"I'm clean and on the pill."

"Me too." I said as I lined myself up with her pussy and slowly started to push in.

I placed my head between her shoulder blades, groaning at how tight and warm she feels wrapped around my cock as I pushed inch by agonising inch inside her pussy, until my hips were flush against her ass.

My eyes were closed.

I haven't moved a single inch.

I could hear her little whines.

"Carl, please move." She begged.

"Give me a moment." I said through gritted teeth. "I don't want this to end."

I pulled back until just the tip was left and then slammed into her. She covered her mouth to muffle her moan.

"Been dreaming about this moment for years." I told her as I started to thrust in and our her pussy. I could feel her pussy tighten around my cock at my confession.

"Same, oh fuck. Just like that Carl." Her and I made eye contact in the mirror. Her eyes were half-closed, little gasps and whines were falling from her lips as I continued to fuck her.

I reached around and gripped her throat gently, pulling her back flush against my chest.

I watching her eyes fly open as her one hand gripped my wrist. I felt her pulse quicken under my hand as I tightened my hold on her throat just a bit more.

The only sounds in the small bathroom were our moans and gasps, my hips meeting her ass I fucked her.

But I needed to taste her.

I pulled out of her, and turned her around before she even knew what was going on.

I buried my face between her thighs, her hands instantly grabbing the back of my head.

Her legs were shaking as I ate her out like this was my last meal.

I couldn't get enough of her.

I was about to wrap my mouth around her clit but she started to pull my head back.

I didn't budge as I took her clit on my mouth and started to suck on it.

Her legs were shaking on either side of my head, but she started to pull even harder on my hair, telling me to get up.

I groaned at the slight pain but I did as she wanted.

"Want to cum on your cock." No need to tell me twice.

I wrapped her leg around my waist and thrust inside her once more.

She was close, her walls were fluttering around my cock.

I changed the angle of my thrusts and I was hitting that spot inside of her that her digging her nails into my back, leaving her mark on me as she buried her face in my chest, crying out my name as her body shook.

I fucked her through her orgasm, not wanting this to end, but I could feel that I was close as well.

"Where?" I asked.

"Back up." I did as she asked, my hand quickly jerking my cock as I watched her slide on to her knees.

She opened her mouth and stuck out her tongue.

At that moment I didn't care how loud I was as I groaned out her name as I placed my cock on her tongue just as I was coming.

She wrapped her lips around my cock and swallowed as quickly as she could.

I had to force myself to keep my eyes open, as I never thought that this would ever happen.

She continued to suck until I pulled my hips back.

She looked up at me and opened her mouth to show me that my cum was all gone.

I tucked my cock away, and helped her to her feet.

I reached into my discarded jacket pocket and pulled out some gum for her and I.

I cleaned my face with the hand soap and water as she fixed herself up.

She looked at the smartwatch on her wrist and her eyes got real wide at the messages she got while she was busy.

"Shit. I gotta go." She finished fixing herself up.

"Same." I sadly said, which had her stopping in her tracks as she was about to open the door.

With her hand on the door handle, she turned to look at me.

"Carl, I don't know if wanted this to be a one time thing, but if you don't have any plans later," She trailed off.

"I don't want this to be a one time thing. I'll be waiting for you once my time in court is done."

"I'll see you later, Officer Gallagher." She kissed my cheek and left me standing there in the washroom.

I touched my cheek, not believing what happened.

I smiled to myself as I walked out of the washroom to go do my time in court.

[notbecauseofvictories]

I think I saw you shared a list of books you’d read a couple years ago and was it you who read something like 350+ books in a single year? If so that’s absolutely remarkable and I’d love to see a list of top ten (or twenty or whatever number) of books you’ve read this year that you recommend

Don't be ridiculous, I only read 303 books in 2021! That's much more reasonable than 350. And I've read fewer and fewer each year since---this year I don't think I'm going to crack 50, though I still have a couple days.

Still, always happy to talk about what I enjoyed. Books are listed in vaguely chronological order, though I make no promises.

Patricia Wants to Cuddle, Samantha Allen

I've mentioned this book before, but essentially I put in the library request solely for the improbability of the premise---The Bachelor heads to the PNW and encounters Bigfoot? Fortunately, it delivered on that promise magnificently. A breezy and delightfully gruesome little novel with a bodycount.

Are You My Mother?, Alison Bechdel

I didn't viscerally connect with this one as much as "Fun Home" but I think it might be because it's…closer to the bone for me. When Bechdel writes about the longing for a mother that can't be answered, pulling back, pleasing, an anger that becomes unspeakable, re-routed to anxiety…it's uh. well it's churned up the silt, let's put it that way.

Greener Pastures, Michael Wehunt

I love short stories, but finding those authors who hit the right notes unerringly, in such a brief space, can be tricky sometimes. Wehunt is the rare exception, strange and unique as a writer, dream-like in his descriptions and images. "October Film Haunt: Under the House" was my favorite, though I can't say for sure whether it's because I recognized the framing device or it was just fun to read…

Running with Scissors, A Wolf at the Table, Lust & Wonder, Augusten Burroughs

I read these out of order (Lust & Wonder first, then the other two) but even so, I was wildly impressed. Lust & Wonder was a revelation; I stumbled on it in the library and walked out with it the same day. No wonder people tell you to read his books, he's got such a clear-eyed meanness, an interesting sort of canniness to his depiction of himself, the people in his life…it really does demonstrate that there is no such thing as a boring life, just a boring narrator. But if Lust & Wonder is Burroughs at the height of his power, Running with Scissors and Wolf at the Table are the necessary steps up to it. More unfinished, more raw---a litany of horrors, not even leavened by that same canny, mean humor that flashes through L&W. It's just horrifically sad to watch every person around this kid fail him, leave, or both; terrifying and unexpectedly funny and yet tender as a sucking wound.

The Princess Bride, William Goldman

I picked this up entirely by chance and ended up being deeply charmed. I don't know what I was expecting---well, no, that's not true, I was expecting the film. But what I got instead was something almost real, pleasantly rough around the edges as Goldman's caustic narration winds its way from Florin to the machinations of S. Morgenstern's lawyers, to his struggles with raising his son. (One of the funniest scenes was when he goes to meet S. Morgenstern's lawyer, and the ravishingly beautiful attorney becomes a horrible old hag the more she talks about how he won't be granted a license.) I was afraid the book would be twee, but at the center of it is a pure (if slightly embarrassing, but truth generally is outside of Florin) love of stories, and wanting stories told.

In the Woods, The Likeness, Broken Harbor, Tana French

As I've said before, I started reading this series because I was traveling to Ireland and thought it seemed appropriate. I didn't go too deep into French's oeuvre, mostly because I couldn't shake wanting the books to be urban fantasy rather than gripping psychological portraits with a decidedly noir sensibility. Still, the books themselves are taut and fascinating, the portraits they paint of the Dublin Murder Squad (all of whom are staggering, wounded in their own ways) and the blighted, post-Celtic Tiger Ireland, are deeply compelling. Also, I do still think The Likeness is a perfect answer to The Secret History.

Lesser Known Monsters of the 21st Century, Kim Fu

There's something truly powerful in a short story that doesn't answer any questions or provide you with any sort of guidance---just walks in and rearranges your photographs so they're slightly off-kilter, leaves you with that destabilization. It's almost spiritual, that sense. In particular, there's a story in the collection about the world's sense of taste disappearing; a woman begins crafting art installations to try and recreate the experience of eating a pear, what your favorite family meal tasted like. Short stories are like that.

Perilous Times, Thomas D. Lee

I was surprised by this one. I know that's how I've described half the books above, but truly, this surprised me---not so much the rising action or plot (there's a sleeping king, knights around a table, a dragon) but I loved the setting so much. The depiction of a slightly-futuristic UK as drowning land sold off for parts; figures like immortal spymaster Marlowe coexisting with reborn Lancelot and Kay; the fay hovering around the edges; and then just….all the factions, the Welsh royalists and men's rights group propped up by military contractors; environmental activists, the references to the hodgepodge that existed in the 4th century AD too. More than anything, the novel conveyed how Britain's always been a place of change, the movement of people and permeable barriers, and that more than anything worked for me. (Also, it's a small thing but I loved how the Camelot crew translated modern concepts and objects into their language and knowledge of the world. It was always shown as hesitation rather than total shock, and I found it both moving and persuasive.)

A Cup of Salt Tears, Isabel Yap

I read this in a series of speculative novellas, which impressed on me yet again how hard it must be to write novellas. (Last year, one of my least favorite books was a novella; I still think about it with joyful hate.) However, Yap takes care to focus on single, brief narrative, concerns herself solely with the very small yet very significant issue of a woman, her husband, who and how she loves, wrapped up together with a kappa. Excellent, haunting.

Books of 2020 | Books of 2021 | Books of 2022

[artists-ally]

{Flatline} OFC x Harvey Specter {Pt. 3)

Uh ohhhh guys it’s Pt. 3 🤭🤭🤭 I am so excited for this. It’s honestly one of my favorite things I’ve written and I hope you all agree. There is a poll at the end so make sure to vote for that <3 enjooyyyyy p.s. I hope this does good justice for this series.

Pt. 1 Pt. 2 Character Playlist

Word Count: 12,795

Warnings: language, angst, anxious thoughts, one singular mention of sexual h*r*ssm*nt in regards to Harvey’s actions with Claudia, smut 18+, the tiniest bit of food play, dom/sub dynamics, praise kink go brrr

***Italic sections indicate flashbacks***

Summary: The aftermath of Harvey breaking his promise to Claudia.

Tagging: @rosedpetal @maxdamax @ashcosmo

~~~~~~

HARVEY'S POV

My legs were numb. That sort of numbness when something happens that you can’t explain. It felt like my life just flashed before my eyes. That image of Claudia’s shaking lip… hearing her broken voice… I don’t think I’ll ever get it out of my fucking head. 

“Harvey, I requested those trades be made an hour ago. Do you wanna tell me why… Harvey?”

I could see Jessica in front of me, but I couldn’t hear a damn thing she said. 

“Harvey, what’s going on?” She closed the door, and I put a hand out to steady myself so I wouldn’t fall on the floor. “What happened?” “I fucked up,” I whispered. 

“Yeah, no shit. You tanked our only opportunity to get a leg up on this Gustoson case. You’re damn right you fucked up-”

“No no,” I sat on the arm of the chair. My hands began to shake so I folded them together. Jessica saw. 

“What the hell did you do?”

“I yelled at Claudia…”

She just blinked at me. “Is that seriously what you’re concerned about? Yelling at an associate? Okay, you yelled at an associate, what’s new? That might as well be in your job description.”

“No no no I didn’t just yell at her I threatened to do the one thing that I promised I would never do and now she’s gone. She left. I can’t- I don’t- I never meant to hurt her but she suggested that we file a motion to dismiss and I got so caught up in my anger about her accusing me of using her that I lost my-”

“Using her? Harvey, what is going on?” “I’ll tell you what’s going on,” Donna barged in. 

“Donna please don’t-”

“Harvey and Claudia have been ‘working together’ for the last month and a half, when in reality he has been a selfish, lying, arrogant brat who has crossed so many lines it’s beginning to look like a Rorschach Test.”

“You know?” I felt my heart suffocate myself. I thought I was gonna throw up.

“In all honesty Harvey, no I didn’t. Not until Claudia just broke down in the elevator and told me everything. I cannot believe that you would use her like that. For your own personal satisfaction are you out of your fucking mind?” “Harvey, what the hell is she talking about?” Jessica’s voice was full of hostility. 

“He thought that it would be a good idea to boost Claudia’s confidence by getting into her pants.”

“Donna it wasn’t-”

Jessica scoffed, covering her face. “What the hell is wrong with you? This has got sexual harassment written all over it, Havrey. Could you really be that delusional?”

“For fucks sake it wasn’t like that!” I screamed. Genuinely screamed and paced around. “I didn’t use her, not intentionally. God dammit I haven't been able to think clearly since the first day that I saw Claudia. She is an incredible lawyer and all I wanted to do was give her something else to focus on because she was afraid to be in a room with me. I just- all I wanted to do was help her find a little bit of confidence and oh my god this sounds so much worse when I say it outloud.”

Donna and Jessica exchanged a look while I slowly felt like my heart was being ripped out of my chest and stomped on the floor with cleats. 

“Okay Harvey, sit down and tell us what happened,” Donna steered me away from putting a hole in the wall to my desk.

“I don’t even know, Donna.” “Well while you two enjoy going down memory lane, I’ll be fighting for our firm's life. If you two don’t get your shit together, and by you two I mean Harvey, then… I don’t even know then.”

She all but slammed the door on her way out, patrons on the other side sending worried glances our way. I turned my chair so they wouldn’t see me. 

“How long has this been going on?” Donna asked. 

I dug my nails into my skin. “Almost two months.”

“Two months? Harvey, how could you not tell me?” “Because I didn’t want to,” I admitted. “And partly because I kind of thought you already knew. You know, the whole ‘Donna superpower’ shit you do.”

“I know I can’t believe I missed it,” she took the chair in front of me. I glared at her so hard I thought I’d light that hair of hers on fire. “Okay bad time for a joke. So, bachelor, why don’t you start from the beginning. And please, I don’t need to know the dirty details, despite my curiosity. Claudia is like a little sister to me and I really don’t want to picture you and her and oh my god I already am. Ugh, please start talking so I don’t have to be tortured.”

So dramatic. I was good looking, and so was Claudia. Why wouldn’t anyone want to picture us together? Then my eyes snapped to the chair she was sitting on. Oh god. Donna was in the chair that I was the first time Claudia and I-

“Get up,” I blurted out, reaching for her and placing her in my desk chair. God dammit we used that one too. Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.

We sat down on the couch and I rubbed my strained eyes. Here goes nothing. 

“When Sheila first sent over the recruits from Harvard, I interviewed all of them. Except for one. There were thirteen associates but I only had twelve meetings set up. So I asked Louis if he was interviewing any of the newbies and he said just one. Obviously this person was some sort of idiot to be going to Louis instead of me, so I popped in.”

“Well, Claudia I think that you have some unbelievable potential at this firm and I’d just like to- Harvey, what are you doing here I am in the middle of an interview.”

“Oh I know, I just wanted to drop by and see how it was going.”

In front of Louis was this warm, chestnut brown head of sleek, silk like hair. She was wearing a lavender blouse and a black maxi skirt with a slit to the knee. She had on these black flats with pearls on them. Summer had just ended, and there was some remaining sunburn on her nose and cheeks. Her eyes were surrounded by prominent lashes and eyebrows, a fine line of makeup between the two; lavender, to match the top. 

“It’s going great, now will you get the hell out and tend to your own interviews and stop barging in on my only one?”

“Harvey Specter,” I introduced, sticking out my hand. She looked from it over to Louis, who was just shooting me daggers. 

“You just can’t help yourself, can you?”“Louis, I’m not trying to woo your associate, I’m just introducing myself to her. We are kind of name partners, you know. It’s the courteous thing to do.”

Again, all she did was look at my hand before slowly standing up. I didn’t miss the way she tried to subtly wipe her hand on her skirt. 

“I’m Claudia. Claudia Martin.”

God dammit that was a pretty name. It sounded so sophisticated, so mature and would sound really nice next to mine. Or with mine. Harvey Specter and Claudia Martin. I don’t know why I thought of hearing or seeing ‘Claudia Specter’ one day, but I did. And I didn’t hate the way it sounded. 

“Welcome to Pearson Specter Litt,” I gave a nice smile. It was clear she was already intimidated to be here, I didn’t need to add to that fire. She barely looked me in the eye for two seconds, but those two seconds made my head spin. 

She had the most gorgeous eyes I think I’ve ever seen in my life. They were amber in the middle but had this ring of hazel around the outer rim. It was just… not something I’ve ever seen before. I didn’t want her to look away because I just wanted to keep looking at them.

And that blush… that I knew wasn’t her sunburn. Not the way it creeped up the side of her face, or at the base of her neck. 

Jesus Harvey, stop staring at her. You’re probably giving off major stalker vibes.

“Well I’ll be around if you need anything, Claudia. Don’t be shy,” I smiled, the best charming one I could. Her full lips were in a tight line, her fingers picking at each other before she sat back down with Louis.

“Okay so you sabotaged Louis’ meeting with Claudia and thought she was beautiful? Why didn’t you just say that?” Donna interrupted. 

“Didn’t you ask me to start from the beginning?” She snapped her lips closed. “So let me tell the goddamn story. Yes, I thought she was stunning. I mean, no one in their right mind would think otherwise. She is so pretty and so smart and twice the person I wish I could be. There is just something about her that I can’t shake from my memory.”

“Yeah we get it, you’re head over heels for Claudia. Now on with it I don’t have all day.”

I rolled my eyes. 

“That was the first time I met her. It wasn’t long after that she started working here when I talked to her again. She was just sitting at her desk, Griffin and whoever else crowded around the opposite end of the bullpen. She was excluded and it made me feel bad.”

I’ve always thought Griffin would be at the top of my list for top associates. He was like me; only shorter, not as good looking, and had blue eyes instead of brown. Did I mention he wasn’t as good looking? Anyway, I had only one intention: get Claudia alone so I could talk to her.

Every day since she started a few weeks ago, I have watched her get off the elevator, walk through the office, and disappear around the corner. It wasn’t fair that she got to look like that, walk like that, and no one was around to appreciate it. 

She was so fucking eye catching. And I didn’t want the other slobs at this firm to get to her before I could.

“Claudia, do you mind helping me with something for a few minutes?” I asked, voice just loud enough for Griffin to hear. 

She looked up, pen cap between her rosy lips, and blinked. That flush creeped onto her cheeks. I tried not to smile. 

“Sure,” she nodded once and stood up, following me out. 

I was not so subtle with the look that I gave Griffin, and he wasn’t so subtle with the way he spoke.

“Is there something you need, Harvey? Claudia is in the middle of a very important depo documentation. I’d hate for her to fall behind.”

What a dick. “No, Griffin. It seems like you’ve got more important things to do with your book club than working on whatever Louis assigned you, so Claudia will work just fine. I prefer an actually hard working associate to someone who’s discussing whatever mediocre steak dinner you had at Texas Roadhouse last Wednesday.”

“Griffin’s eyes simmered and shot daggers into Claudia. But he didn’t open his mouth. I thought about punching him in the face for looking at her like that, and that’s when I realized I was fucked. That I was willing to do that for Claudia when it was literally the second time I’ve ever talked to her.”

“I’ll say,” Donna huffed. “What happened next?” “I just had her deliver some letters for me to the courthouse. I asked her something about Griffin, if they were ever acquainted with each other.”

“And what did she say?”

“She told me that Griffin was a total douchebag and tried to use his social status to get a leg up on her in class discussions, cutting corners to discredit her. It was so unfair and I just-”

Donna put a hand on my knee. “Relax, Harvey. Griffin isn’t here, stop looking like you want to put him through a wall.” “Well, Donna, I do want to put him through a wall because he has been an asshole to Claudia for no other reason than she was good at her job. It makes me sick.”

“When did you start becoming so protective of her? I’ve never seen you like this with anyone other than Mike, Louis, Jessica and myself. You must… really really care about her.”

“I think it was during the mock trial. She was always off to the side, always attentive, but never spoke up. I couldn’t stop myself from glancing over at her every once and a while to see if she wanted to be included. But she never did.”

“This case may seem simple, but the husband is a grade A asshole. He has done everything to cover his tracks and is gonna come at us with everything he’s got. Find me some evidence and make it good.”

They all branched off, heading this way and that. Claudia went to the only logical place, right to me.

“Hi, Mr. Specter-sir. I just have one question about-about the case if you’ve got a minute. If you have somewhere to be I understand and I can ask later,” she said quickly.

“Of course, what do you want to know?” I couldn’t help but think her stuttering was cute. I knew she was nervous, specifically around me; she always seemed so tense with me, so I made sure to always speak quietly and calmly with her. 

“Was Mr. Saros the one who paid off that investment banker? Did the money come from his account directly or a different one?”

God she was so good. “It came from him and his wife’s joint account.”

Claudia had a slight grin to her lips, and she nodded before striding away. She was going to crack this wide open. I just knew it. 

I went back to my office to wait it out, to see if any one could come up with an idea before Claudia. Before I knew it, it was three o'clock and I had a meeting to go to for another case Mike and I were working on. When we got in the car, Mike was looking at me with a knowing smile. 

“What?” 

He shook his head, “Nothing, just wondering how long you’re going to pretend you’re not in love with Claudia Martin.”

“The first year associate?”

“Don’t pretend you don’t know who she is. I see you watch her like a starving animal every time she comes into the office. And every time she leaves. And every time she asks Donna something.”

Uh oh.

“Oh please, I have far better things to do than get involved with a first year.”

“You didn’t deny that you were in love with her.”

“Do you want to get smacked? Or I could kick you out of this car at sixty miles per hour, see how you like the taste of asphalt.” Mike did not know when to stop pushing my buttons. 

“I think you just proved my theory.”

“What theory?”

“That you are in love and you are incredibly protective of Claudia. I heard about what you said to Griffin when he offered his help because Claudia was ‘too busy’. You know he pawned that work off to her, right?”

My eyes narrowed and my jaw clenched, as well as my fists. I fixed my gaze out the window and took some deep breaths. Jesus… he had a point. A huge point. God dammit I’m in trouble.

“Mike knew before I did?” Donna sounded mildly offended. 

“Well, not really. I never told him what we were doing. But I did tell him that I liked her. And when he told me that Griffin was pawning off his work to Caudia it sent me into a spiral. Shit, Donna… I am in so deep with Claudia. I really fucked up. I mean really bad. I made a promise to her that I wouldn’t treat her like the other associates because she wasn’t like the other associates. She was Claudia. And Claudia was- is- so much better than the rest of them.” “Why would you make a promise like that if you knew you wouldn’t be able to keep it?” “I had every intention of keeping it, but then all the shit with started happening when Louis found out about Mike being a fraud and he took that fucking case with Gerard and I couldn’t hold it together.” “Why did you even make it in the first place?” Donna asked, but I really didn’t want to tell this story.

I sighed, the type of sigh that fills your whole body.

“I was going off on Griffin one day, for being an asshole to some of the other associates, about pawning off his work to Claudia and she saw.”

“Griffin, I don’t care whose idea it was. You were the one to destroy his work, so you’re going to face the consequences.”

“It was just a prank, the entire document wasn’t supposed to be deleted.”

“You think tampering with another associate’s work is a prank? I hope when you go home tonight you think long and hard about who you wanna be as a man because as of right now, there isn’t going to be anything for you to come back to tomorrow. And you better pray to whatever you believe in because if there’s one person you don’t want to make an enemy out of, it’s me. Do you understand that?”

He clenched his jax, shoving his hands in his pockets. “yes.”

“You are going to be Louis’ personal associate.”“No, no way you can make me work for that man. He’s a total airhead.”“Yes, he is, now you two have something to talk about. You can bond over your selfish, outrageous egotistical behavior, it’ll be just like looking in a mirror.”

“Harvey I’m-”

“I don’t care what you are Griffin. You have no right to treat the other associates like that, especially Claudia. If I ever catch wind of you throwing your work load on her again so help me God I will make sure it is the last thing you do at this firm.”

If my point wasn’t clear enough by my words, the look I gave him would certainly do. He left my office without another word and I followed his movements all the way. But my eyes met Claudia’s. And they were wide and panicked. She quickly scurried away, head down and steps fast. She looked so afraid. 

She wasn’t afraid of me was she? I mean, all I had done was rip Griffin a new one for being an asshole. And he deserved it, Claudia would never do something to deserve that kind of lashing. 

“And so I promised her. I fucking promised her that I would never flip out on her and then I went and did exactly. God Donna… I am so fucked up.”

Her slim hand rubbed up and down my shoulder, but I only wanted it to be Claudia’s. I wanted her right next to me so I could go through all of this with her and explain that it wasn’t just some fling. Not to me. Never to me. I never wanted it to be temporary, she was… she’s it for me. 

The familiar prick crept into my eyes, my nose, and the tears fell. Donna has only seen me cry a handful of times, but never over a girl.

But Claudia wasn’t just some girl. She wasn’t just some hookup or some prize to be won. She was Claudia Martin. My Claudia. The quiet, shy first year associate I had worked so hard to get out of her shell. It wasn’t just for my pleasure, I truly didn’t want to see her fall behind just because she couldn’t ask me a question.

I saw that look in her eye; hunger and determination. Just like mine. I wanted it to shine brighter than her smile. Which was equally as devastating as her work in the courtroom. But I just wanted her to feel comfortable around me and I didn’t know what else to do. She was like a frightened baby deer around me. A constant nervous wreck at the drop of my name. I didn’t want her to be afraid of me, I wanted nothing more than to be a safe space for her. 

And maybe it’s just because I’m an idiot, but I’m realizing now that maybe I’m the one who needed the safe place. To just have someone to go to all the time. To share all of my proud moments and sneak little kisses and touches here and there. 

I need Claudia. I need her.

Maybe I took it too far. Started at the wrong place. I should’ve offered to take her out to dinner instead of inviting her up for a drink in my office after her first case. I shouldn’t have done it so backwards, and it kills me that I’m only drawing that connection now. Why couldn’t I have thought of that earlier? She would’ve been so much better off without all the backwards, fucked up shit that I did.

But it was so nice. To finally have the one thing I have been craving for so long. She was so soft, and she was so sweet under my touch and I couldn’t help myself. As soon as I first kissed her it was end game. I didn’t want to kiss anyone else. I wouldn’t ever kiss anyone again, not the way I kissed Claudia. More than lust. More than just a desire. 

Her lips on mine made my head go blank. I had an awful habit of having work thoughts creep their way into my head every once in a while. But never with her. Even when we were only talking about work, I couldn’t think about it. I only thought about her. About how brilliant she was, about how soft and warm and perfect her lips were on mine. About how she always made me feel at ease and comforted. I doubt she could ever make anyone afraid. Except maybe an opposing counsel. 

If I ever had to face her in court… I know I’d lose. For one, I’d give her anything she wanted simply because she could put me on my knees with a single look. And normally I’d hate to let a woman have that much control over me, but for Claudia… I’d let her do whatever she wanted. And Second, she knows what to do. All the time. She never misses a beat, and is always listening. Even when you think she isn’t.

I am so in love with Claudia. I felt my heart crack open. My voice more or less does the same. 

“Harvey…” “I am in love with her, Donna. And I think I have been for a long time.”

She was quiet, and a throat cleared. Mike was there in front of me, his hands in his pockets, a look of worry on his face. “Is everything alright?”

I saw Donna shake her head out of the corner of my eye. She didn’t say anything, but I knew she wanted to. 

“I broke my promise to Claudia.” That was all I said. I heard his sharp inhale, and he came and sat in front of us. “God dammit Mike… I really messed up. I hurt the one person I couldn’t afford to and- and I don’t know what to do.”

“Go talk to her,” Mike said. “If you’re serious about how you feel about Claudia, then you need to go tell her that it was never… whatever you were doing before. She has anxiety, Harvey. She is going to let her brain tell her things about you that aren’t true. And you need to be there to soothe the fire before it does irreversible damage.” “Well, what do you and Rachel do when you get into an argument?” 

“Harvey,” Donna said, “You aren’t Mike, and Claudia isn’t Rachel. Whatever they do might not work for you. You need to do what feels right for you and your relationship.” “I don’t know if you know this Donna, but I haven’t done something like this before. I don’t know how to talk to her. How to not make her anxious around me.” “We’ll help you,” Mike nods, as well as Donna. “We can come up with a plan but right now we’ve got a bigger problem on our hands.” What could be more devastating than hurting Claudia? 

Nothing. The answer was nothing.

____

CLAUDIA’S POV

I toed off my shoes, leaving them in the growing pile by my front door. I sighed at it. Why couldn’t they just put themselves away? 

My splitting headache was doing nothing to help either. 

Before I could even get a thought about what I could cook for dinner, the doorbell rang. I swear to god if Greg was here asking me about those flowers on my wreath again I was going to smack him with it, throw it over his head and shove him back inside his apartment and-

“Claudia, it’s Mike. I know you’re here, can we talk?”

Mike? What the hell is he doing here? 

I seriously debated giving my best housekeeper impression and deadbolting the door. But it was Mike, and he hadn’t done anything to deserve a cold shoulder. Oh god, what if Harvey was with him and I was getting set up? Oh shit.

“No, Harvey isn’t with me. I promise.”

I stalked to the door, pulling it open and glaring up at Mike. “The last time someone made me a promise I regretted it.” He just pressed his lips in a flat line. “What are you doing here, Mike?”

“I’m here on behalf of Harvey.” “Why?” “Because he’s worried about you.” Why is he worried about me? He made it very clear he didn’t give a shit about me. “He’s beating himself up over what he did.”

“Good,” that I didn’t restrain. 

“Claudia, he is really shaken up right now. He didn’t mean to do what he did. Now, I’m not going to stand here and pretend I know all the details about what he did but-” “He used me, Mike. Plain and simple.” All I got was a raised eyebrow. “He told me he wanted to ‘build my confidence’ which I was actually naive enough to believe, and it led to my worst fucking nightmare. But he just got what he wanted, to get his dick wet and then was done with me.”

“Claudia, trust me, it wasn’t like that. Harvey would never use you like that. He wouldn’t dream of it, trust me.”

“Are you sure because it seems like that’s exactly what he did. He saw that I was hard working, manipulated me into working with him, and treated me like shit when I was just trying to find a solution to his goddamn problem. I have more self respect than that. To let him continue to get away with that.”

“Can I ask what he did?”

My throat closed, and my palms began to sweat. I knew my annoying blush was there by the way his eyes dipped to my neck. 

“After I won my first case with him, he invited me up to his office for some drinks. Said something along the lines of wanting to get to know each other so I didn’t have to feel so nervous. So I went up, and one thing led to another and… I don’t know why I let it happen. I knew it would end badly. I can’t believe I let myself believe that he would be into me beyond anything other than his pure primal satisfaction. But he seemed so genuine and so caring. Like he genuinely wanted to help me, and some part of me obviously thought it was a good idea because it happened again. And again. And again. God, I sound like the biggest loser right now.” “No you don’t,” Mike gave me a soft smile. “If it means anything, those feelings weren’t one sided. I know it doesn’t mean much of anything coming from me but… Harvey is really really fucking sorry about what he did.”

I was physically shaking. Through my trembles, I managed to speak, despite my thoughts trying to shut me down. “It hurt so bad, Mike. I really like Harvey, and I thought he might feel the same way. I guess I was wrong. So… so wrong.”

“No, Claudia you’re not wrong. Harvey is a grade A asshole but he wouldn’t-”

“If there is any chance of Harvey sorting this out, you need to tell him to grow a set and tell me himself,” I have no idea where this confidence came from. “He needs to stop getting other people to do his job for him. If he can’t recognize that now, of all times, then… then I don’t think he deserves me.”

Mike blinked long, rubbing his fingers over his mouth. “Harvey didn’t ask me to come here.” “What?” What? 

“Yeah,” he sighed. “I knew Harvey wouldn’t come tonight. I’m not sure he’ll come at all but… Claudia, he talks about you like I’ve never seen him talk before. He gushes over you to the point where it’s annoying. And when I went to go and talk to him about what our next move was for this case… Claudia, he was crying. He was sobbing with Donna in his office and-”

Good, I wanted to say. But it kind of crushed my soul. Harvey was crying over what he did to me. 

“I’ve never seen him cry before,” Mike looked hurt, too. “He regrets what he said. I know he does.”

“I believe you.”

“Good,” he nods. “I don’t want to do his job for him and I think-”

“But that doesn’t mean I will forgive him for what he said,” and with that, I closed the door, locking it for the night.

_____

Saturday and Sunday were so agonizing. The last thing I wanted to do was go into an office after a weekend of anything but rest and relaxation. I was tired and hadn’t showered and needed some restful sleep. Not to be woken up three times a night by dreams of Harvey touching me. Those certainly didn’t help. 

My mind kept replaying our first time together. Specifically when he said 'Oh, Claudia, you really are that innocent, aren’t you?’ Innocent and naive… just like he said that night. Who was I to think that Harvey would take any interest in me besides the fact that I was good at being a lawyer? I wasn’t special in any way, I think he just knew that I was easy to manipulate into doing what he needed. 

There was no way in hell I’d ever do another thing for Havrey, the all powerful jackass, Specter again.

As I set my stuff on my desk, Griffin walked up. Great. Just great, what did this prick want?

“Hey umm… Hi Claudia,” he rubbed the back of his head. “I just- I’m sorry. About all the things I’ve done to you. You didn’t deserve it and I want you to know that you have always been six-times the lawyer I wish I could be. I was jealous and took it out on you. And I shouldn’t have so… I’m sorry.”

Did I just hear that right? Did Griffin Harper just apologize to me? What the fuck is going on?

“Oh,” great way to start, idiot. “Thank you, Griffin.”

He just gave me a short nod before scurrying away. Well, that was… unexpected. Certainly I couldn’t ever let us be friends, but it was nice to know he wasn’t my mortal enemy any longer. 

I went about my business, plagued with thoughts and reminders of Harvey ever which way I went. Louis and Jessica sent me an email with some files to print out so I scanned them, proofed them, and sent them to the printing room. 

God it sent a shiver down my spine to be back in here after he… don’t finish the thought don’t finish the thought-

“Hey, Claudia,” Donna snapped me out of my heated thoughts. “How are you?” “You can cut the bullshit now, Donna.”

She sighed, “it was a genuine question.” “And that was a genuine answer. I’m not in the mood.”

“Claudia-” “No, Donna. What Harvey did wasn’t okay, and I’m not going to stand here and pretend like what he did didn't hurt. Because it did and I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it ever since. I don’t need you here to remind me.”

“Have you ever considered that Harvey may want to fix it?”

“No, Donna. I haven’t. And I’m not going to,” I stood my ground, squaring off my freshly printed papers before making more copies for Louis. 

“What are you talking about?”

I scoffed. “Do you really think that I wouldn’t figure out what was going on?” “Again, what are you-” “I know Harvey just thinks that I am gullible and naive and easy to push around because he makes me nervous. And it’s true. Whenever I am near him I can’t keep myself composed and I’m sick and tired of being walked all over. I can’t believe I was stupid enough to let myself see otherwise, but I’m even more upset that you didn’t come clean and tell me.” “Claudia, no one is walking over you. And I didn’t know about any of this until you told me on Friday. Harvey came to you because he knew can rely on you and your abilities to get things accomplished. He wanted the chance to work with you and get you to trust him a little. You have to know that by now,” Donna was standing right next to me, blocking my way out. 

“Maybe I do, but that doesn’t mean that I believe it. Donna, I am not some corporate power house that is gonna bring firms to their knees. Not like he does.” “Nobody does what Harvey does.” “And that’s my point,” I grit my teeth. “Harvey was trying to make me into a mini version of him, just like he did with Mike and it’s not what I want to be. Donna, I am not assertive. I am not reckless and willing to go behind peoples backs to get the job done. I like rules and regulations and the law. They are there so people abide by them, and Harvey, more often than not, doesn’t do that. Yes, I look up to him as a role model because I admire his tenacity. But that doesn’t mean I like or agree with the things he does.”

“And you think that I like it when he goes and cuts someone’s legs out from under them?”

“I didn’t say that. But that means you know how I feel. I can’t- I don’t… I don’t want to be around someone like that. It makes me feel like I’m suffocating. And worst of all he gave me his word that he wouldn’t lash out and treat me like the other associates. I cant believe that I was stupid enough to believe that Harvey would-“

Both of us stopped as someone pushed through the door. 

Harvey…

“Donna,” Harvey’s mouth was pressed in a flat line. He jerked his head over his shoulder. Donna gave me a sympathetic look and turned on her heel. Where was she going?

“Wait, Donna don’t-” I whispered.

“You’ll be fine,” she gave me a firm look, patting my shoulder as she walked around Harvey. Oh my god… she set me up.

My heart felt like it was ripping out of my fucking chest. The last thing I needed right now was to be in an enclosed space with Harvey.

He stared at me, fussing with the cufflink on his shirt. “Claudia.” “I’m sorry, Mr. Specter, but I have to get these to Louis.” I tried to go around him, like Donna had, but he just let his body fall against the wall. Blocking the way. I couldn’t bring myself to look up at him and ask him to let me go. 

“I want you to listen to me.” His voice was stern, in a demanding way, but not in a pissed off way. 

“No, I am in a rush. Now if you’ll excuse me-”

“No,” he said with a shake of his head. “Come on, Claudia. Please just talk to me. I tried to call you but you didn’t answer and-.”

“I know, but I don’t want to talk to you. I want you to get out of my way so I can go do my job.” 

“A little feisty today, aren’t we?” He pushed off his shoulder, taking a step towards me, I took one back. And another as he took one. 

“No, I need to-” “Get those copies to Louis, I heard you,” Harvey acknowledged, but didn’t stop walking closer to me. My back eventually hit a copier and I almost fell over, but Harveys arms came to either side of my body, blocking me in. “And I don’t care.”

His face was inches from mine, chest inches from mine. I felt desperate for a breath. I forgot how to think, how to appear unphased. Everything he’s taught me has vanished from my mind. His eyes, much darker in this low over-head light, seemed to pierce my soul. 

“What… What are you doing?” My voice was barely audible. 

“I want you to know that I wouldn’t ever, ever, take advantage of you like that. I can’t even believe that you would think that. You think I enjoy making you a nervous wreck? Well, I don’t. It honestly makes me sick that even after all this time, you can’t trust me.”

“It’s not that I don’t trust you.”

“Then what is it? Because clearly I am not understanding,” his tone deepened, voice scratching in his throat. 

I couldn’t- I didn’t know how to admit to him-

“I- I umm… Mr. Specter I can’t-”

“Stop calling me that, please, Claudia. Stop seeing me as your boss for one second and see me as literally anything else.”

I swallowed. Nothing went down. “Harvey… you are… you scare me more than anyone else I’ve ever met.” “Why?” his brows knit together. “What is it about me that makes you so afraid of me?”

“Everything.” I was shaking, visibly shaking in front of him. I looked anywhere but his eyes because I knew if I did I’d crack open and bleed my heart all over him. 

His exhale was sharp enough to rustle the small hairs framing my face. “Claudia just-”

“I can’t be around you without feeling like I’m gonna drown in your presence.” 

He was stunned silent for a beat too long. “What is that supposed to mean?”

“Harvey I told you I didn’t want to-”

“Please, Claudia, tell me why you are so afraid of me.” He was begging. Begging for me to explain.

“Because I know that if I let myself think for one fucking second that you actually like working with me I’ll drop my guard around you. And I cannot afford to do that because there are things I keep locked inside that I would rather take to my grave than ever let someone know.”

“And what, you don’t think I’m equally as terrified to have these feelings for you?” “Not like mine.” Harvey gave me a very concerned glance. “There, you asked me to tell you. Please just let me go.”

“No, not until you tell me what is haunting you so much you’re willing to let it eat you alive rather than just let it out for once in your life. Look, I get that you’re a private person, and it’s hard for you to trust people, but that doesn’t mean you need to keep everything bottled inside and let it rot you from the inside out-”

“For the love of guard Harvey it’s you,” I shouted, far louder than I meant to. “It is you that is driving me insane. I cannot go a single moment of my day without thinking about you. I am terrified that you are going to see right through me and figure out that every thought that goes on inside my head has to do with you because for some reason, known only by some sick and twisted higher power, I want you to see me the way I see you. I want you to want me as much as I want you and-”

I stopped because I ran out of air. And then it hit me so hard I saw stars. What the fuck have I just done? My vision began to black out, my heart beating too fast for my lungs to keep up with. 

Harvey had backed up a step, mouth opening and closing like a fish out of water. 

I was going to throw up, I was sure of it. I tried to speak, but my mind had melted and oozed out of my ears. 

I ran, I left the copies on the floor; at some point I dropped them. And ran. His hand caught my elbow and I shrieked, whipping around just as Harvey slammed the door closed, pinning me, yet again. 

“You do not get to drop that ball and run away,” his voice had a darkness I’ve never heard. “Claudia, in what way do you want me?”

Frozen. My mind was utterly dysfunctional and useless. I couldn’t think, I’m surprised I remembered how to breathe. God his eyes…

“Claudia, please answer me.” Now his voice was tender, filled with warmth. His fingers tucked a loose strand of hair behind my ear. “You have to tell me in what way now or I’m… you have to tell me.”

“Why does it matter? I've already ruined everything I’ve had going for me.” I was meek with my words. Wimpy. Cowardice. 

“Because it matters to me.”

“I want you, I want Harvey.”

“As in you want me, and not as your boss, Claudia?” He clarified. I had to shut my eyes, to turn my cheek to him so I wouldn’t see his reaction when I nodded in confirmation. “Fucking hell…”

“I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry. Just… just let me go and I can hand Jessica my letter of resignation right now and you never have to see me again-”

“Are you out of your mind?” Harvey’s caramel eyes were wide. “Claudia, I don’t want you to go. Not for one fucking second. Why do you even have a letter drafted?”

“But I just-” 

His fingers gripped my chin, forcing me to look up at him when I spoke. God dammit… Harvey’s thump caressed my lip, pulling it down and watching it spring up. Slowly, ever so slowly, he dipped it inside my mouth. I couldn’t help the soft noise that startled out of me. 

“Claudia… you have no idea how much I have been praying to hear you say those words. I have been driving myself out of my mind with what to say. How to say it and I- I don’t know how to tell you everything I’ve been wanting to. For weeks now.

“I have been thinking of you nonstop. I keep making up excuses and things to come see you during the day. I want nothing more than to get the chance to treat you right, and I want you to want it too. I promised myself I wouldn’t make a move unless you made one first because I knew how petrified you were of me. I can’t- I won’t have you be afraid of me if we do this.

“But I fucked up. I got ahead of myself and I didn’t go in the direction that I should've. I should've just asked you out to dinner, been a true gentleman rather than selfish. You have no idea how long I have been practicing what to say. I just made everything so much worse. And I wish like hell I could take it all back and do it all again because I am so so so fucking sorry for breaking my promise.”

I stared up at him, at the tears spilling over his lashes, and the flush on his cheeks. His lip quivered. He looked so vulnerable. So open and honest. Every part of me wanted to take it to heart, but that voice in the back of my head was telling me not to believe it.

“Harvey I-”

“Please, Claudia,” Harvey knelt to the ground, sitting back on his heels. “I will do whatever you want to gain your trust back. Anything… anything. But I can’t let you walk away from me. I want a real chance to make you happy, to give you every part of me. I will do or say or answer whatever you want but please do not leave me. If you truly don’t want me, tell me, and we never have to talk again. I will make it like I was never here in the first place if you told me to, but I don't think you want that. And I don’t want it either.”

Harvey was on his knees. Begging me to open my heart up to him. 

“Please don’t make me regret this, Harvey…”

He let out a breath, and a smile accompanied the tears that fell down his face. He reached for my hand, and I let him grab it. His fingers were warm and smooth in mine, familiar and comforting as he gently tugged me towards him. 

“I'm so sorry, Claudia. I will regret nothing more than the words I said to you. But I want to fix it, I want to be better. Not just for you, but for myself. But you are what makes me want to be better. I need to learn to control myself and take a page out of my own book to make that happen.”

Harvey rested his head on my stomach, and I let my fingers thread through his spiky hair. 

“But I don’t want you to be afraid of me anymore. I can’t- I won’t let you be afraid to ask me a question. I want to be there for you, work related or not, but I can’t do it if you don’t meet me halfway. I do remember you making me a promise back, to not see me as a monster.”

My hand stopped, and he looked up. I wanted to agree, but I was still upset, and he must’ve seen that. 

“Okay, that was a bad time to bring that up.”

“Yup.” 

Harvey huffed a laugh, standing back up. His smile was sweet, his finger gentle as it swept some hair away from my face. 

“You are the most beautiful girl I have ever seen, Claudia Olivia Martin.”

“How did you find out my middle name?”

“Donna,” he smiled wider. I just rolled my eyes. “I don’t really know how to do any of this, so I asked her for some help. I knew I had to do it myself. I just didn’t really know where to start and she’s… well, she’s Donna.” “Yes, she is Donna,” I smiled up at him. “But it’s gonna take me more than that to convince me.”

“Oh I have like seven other things lined up and ready to go. If you'd like to hear them. First, you are the most stunning, breathtaking, gorgeous woman I have ever met in my life. Second, I admire every part of you. All your good habits, your bad, your anxious thoughts and brave approach to life. Because they all make you you. Three, I am the biggest fucking idiot. For starting all of this off wrong, for yelling at you. For leading you to believe that I just wanted to get in your pants.”

“You’re also an asshole. A bit of a coward and a bitch. Did I say that you were an asshole?”

“Okay okay,” he placed his hands on my hips and I let him, doing nothing to hide the giggle that bubbled out. “Yes, I am all of those things. And, for the record, I did want to get in your pants, just not that way.”

“Of course you did, who could resist all of this?” My heart sped up when he looked at me over, a huge grin spreading his cheeks wide and bright. 

“Looks like you’ve gained a little confidence, huh?”

“Well, I did have a not so awful teacher. That was before he betrayed me.” “Are you gonna stop rubbing salt into the wound?”

I faked a ponder, “Nope.”

“Claudia,” he pressed a tentative kiss to my cheek, then gauged my response before placing one on the other. “Olivia,” another kiss. “Martin.” He kissed my forehead, then the tip of my nose. “I will never be able to take back what I said, but I hope you find it in your heart to give me a second chance. Even good people are great at making bad decisions. I know I can be a better man, and I know you know that too. Just one,” a kiss to my left cheek, “More,” right cheek, “Chance.”

His lips hovered over mine, waiting for permission before he pressed them into mine. My heart was beating so fast. So strong, all because of him. All for him. 

My eyes met his, “Okay, Harvey.”

Those devastating eyes ignited. His smile grew so wide I got lost in it with my own. I was pressed flat to him, my hands on his shoulders, his hands on my lower back. My ears were buzzing with my pulse and I hoped he felt how fast it was. Who knew Harvey had such a way with words? I wondered how long he practiced all of this in the mirror. Who knows, maybe he was secretly a hopeless romantic and-

“Claudia,” Harvey snapped me out of my daydream. 

“Hmm?” “Please tell me I can kiss you.”

Oh. Right. 

“And what if I say no?”

“Then I won’t.”

“And if I say yes?” “I’ll make sure it is the best damn kiss you’ve ever and will ever have.”

Sounds pretty good to me. I pressed up on my toes, arms wrapping around his neck, and finally let our lips say hello. It had been too long, It felt so right, so perfect. And I realized it felt like all the other times we’ve kissed; I didn’t want to kiss anyone else. I wanted to kiss Harvey. Harvey goddamn Specter. 

I should find out what his middle name is from Donna to surprise him. 

“Come over tonight,” he blurted out.

“What?” “Come over, let me cook something for you. We can make it our first date. A real date. Let me start this off on the right foot. Unless tonight is too soon and you need more time to heal and process or-”

“Just stop talking,” I literally put my fingers over his mouth. “I’d love to come over for dinner, Harvey.”

If I hadn’t been in his arms I’m sure he’d jump up and down out of excitement. He kissed me again, and again, and again. The slight stubble on his chin tickled my neck enough for me to tuck down into my shoulders when he kissed below my ear. 

“Hey, Claudia, I just want to make sure- oh. Well, this seems to be going well,” Donna had a proud smile on her face, arms crossed over her chest.

“It is,” Harvey beamed down, never taking his eyes off of me. 

“Good, I’m glad to hear it.”

“How much of this was your idea?” I asked. 

“I suggested he get a horse and carriage to surprise you on your way out but he knew you wouldn’t want a grand gesture,” She said. “So I think that should say it well enough as to who came up with all the ideas.” When I looked back at him, he had a flush to his cheeks, and hid his grin. 

“Wow, Harvey, I’m impressed.” “Well,” he shrugged. “I don’t know… I wanted it to be authentic and special. Something that you would take to heart and genuinely appreciate. So it’s the best I could come up with over the weekend because if I didn’t do it soon I was going to explode.”

“Seriously, Claudia. This idiot wouldn’t leave my house for two days. I had to kick him out so he could get a shower and change. Did you even sleep?” “You haven’t slept?” He shook his head. “Harvey, what- okay. We need to do our dinner another day because if you try to cook you might set your house on fire and that would-” “Nope, too bad. I’m fine, really Claudia. I can handle making dinner. I’ll leave early and take a nap if that would make you feel better.” “Yes, it would,” I sighed out, looking back at Donna who had a look that meant trouble. “What?” “You guys are adorable.”

I blushed. “Oh, wait! Before you go, what’s Harvey’s middle name? I mean, he went to you for mine so it’s only fair…”

“Don’t you dare,” Harvey pointed at Donna who all but melted the Wicked Witch of the West with her smirk.

“Reginald.”

“Reginald?” I repeated. “Seriously?”

“It’s a family name, alright?” He defended. “Now, if you two will excuse me I have a very important dinner to plan for an even more important girl. Donna, can you-” “Already cleared your schedule.”

“Remind me to give you a raise.” “Oh I’ve already written a bonus check, it just needs your signature.” “I’m surprised you didn’t forge it,” I snickered. 

“I would’ve but having Harvey do it makes it that much more satisfying.”

Harvey just shook his head, but smiled at us both. “I’ll see you tonight, is seven good?” “Sounds perfect,” I nodded, relishing in his warmth as he pressed one more kiss to the top of my head before leaving. 

“So,” Donna swayed on her feet. “I take it that things went well?” “Yeah, yeah it did. I was surprised, today has been so weird. Even Griffin apologized to me.” “Griffin? Really?” “Yeah,” I followed in step behind her towards the bullpen. “He genuinely apologized to me. It was so unexpected. Now this… I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t dreading this happening. But it turned out way better than I expected so I can’t complain. I need to stop expecting the worst case scenario all the time and believe that I can handle anything that comes at me.”

“Now that sounds like true growth and confidence,” Donna slung her arm over my shoulder. “And definitely something Harvey couldn’t have taught you.” “No, he didn’t. That was all on my own.”

___

As I packed up to head home for the day, my stomach was on fire with nerves about tonight. Not nerves, excitement. 

“Hey, Claudia,” Griffin caught up to me right before the elevator closed. “Do you want to join us for drinks tonight?”

I just smirked. “Sorry, Griffin. I can’t, I have a date with Harvey Specter.” And I let the door shut before he could get on.

____

This building. For fucks sake his front door cost more than what I make in a year, probably. The door man had given me a bit of a side eye when I asked to be let up to Harvey. Well, here I was. 

The bottle of wine in my hand wasn’t getting any colder as I paced outside of his apartment. Was I making this a bigger deal than it needed it to be? Most definitely. 

I knocked. 

Harvey opened it a few moments later, a smug look on his face. “I was wondering how long you were going to just stand there.”

God dammit. The heat rose up my neck and I looked away. “Just shut up and take the wine.”

He chuckled, plucking it from my grasp before stepping aside to let me in. I gazed up and into his hallway, following it down to the kitchen. Woah… holy windows. The already set sun lit up the sky with blues and purples, making all of this feel very cinematic. 

“You didn’t need to bring this, Claudia,” Harvey smiled nonetheless. 

“I just- I don’t know, isn't that what people do when they’re invited over?”

“Why are you still so nervous?” 

Right to it, I guess. “What makes you say that?” “Well,” he sighed, shoving his hands in his pockets. He was wearing all black. He looked… too good for his own good. Or mine for that matter of fact. “For starters, you’ve clearly been running your fingers through your hair. Second, I’ve watched you fiddle with that string on your sleeve at least four times now.”

My fingers ceased their motion. I had been toying with it. “I like to keep my hands busy.”

“I call it a nervous habit.”

“Did you invite me here for dinner or just to pick on me for being anxious?” 

“You have no reason to be anxious here,” he crept closer, taking my hand in his. Harvey gently kissed the back of my fingers. “There is no one here to watch, no prying eyes to hide from. It’s just me, Claudia.”

“And that is precisely what makes me nervous,” I did let a laugh bubble up. “But, you’re right. I guess there is no reason to be so… terrified.”

“Good,” he smiled, placing his hands on my hips. I let mine fall around his shoulders. “Dinner will be ready in a few minutes.” I turned to look behind me, a few pots and a pan of vegetables on the stove. Harvey’s hands still lingered on my sides as I peered over to look inside.

“I didn’t know the great Harvey Specter could cook,” I jabbed, making him roll his eyes playfully. “It looks lovely, thank you.”

“Told you, there’s more to the name than the title it comes with.”

From the table, I watched him plate the stir fry dish and bring it over. I was starving, and I made sure to eat my lunch a little later so I wouldn’t be ravenous by the time this dinner rolled around. I wasted no time taking a forkful and practically inhaling it. 

“I’ll take that as a good sign?” 

I nodded, “It’s amazing. Where did you learn to cook like this?” “Here and there. My brother owns a bar and restaurant back home, we used to like to cook together all the time.” “I didn’t know you had a brother,” I tilted my head. “That’s amazing, though. Glad you put those skills to good use.”

“Do you have any siblings?”

I hummed, “Yeah I have two brothers. I’m the baby of the family.”

“Am I going to have to win their trust one day?” 

My laugh echoed through the spacious dining room, “No, they’re pretty cool. Vince, my oldest brother, is married, has two kids who are in college. My other brother, Caleb, is the one you’ve gotta watch out for. He’s my twin and very vocal about the men in my life, especially when he doesn’t think they’re good enough for me.”

“I see,” Harvey gave me a look I knew all too well. 

“Yeah, he can be a pain in my ass sometimes. But I love him, he always stood up for me when I was too afraid. Whether someone was picking on me in school or tried to get one up on me at a bar, he was always there. He’s just protective of me, they both are, but Caleb… he’s always had my back.” “It’s good to have those types of people on your side,” Harvey’s smile was so bright. 

For about an hour we ate and had dessert. I don’t know how, he probably asked Donna, but he had my absolute favorite chocolate cake. Coated in a thick butter cream, it practically melted in my mouth. I wasn’t shy about telling him how delicious it was. 

“I could marry this cake,” I knew I was being dramatic, but I didn’t care. “If I could take this cake, and mold it in the shape of a man, I would.”

Harvey grinned, looking from the cake on his plate, back up to me as I spooned another mouthful. He dipped his finger in the frosting and swiped it across his cheek. I blushed, so hard, and he just laughed and laughed. 

“You think you’re funny, huh?” I had to put my face in my hands. 

“I do, actually. Why don’t you come over here and clean it off for me,” Harvey spoke dangerous words. I raised my eyebrow in question, but he merely scooted his chair back in response, palms turned upward. 

Now or never, I thought. 

I stood, my bare feet padding quietly to Harvey. This is where I had confidence. Could use his own game against him. Because up until this point, all Harvey knows about me is that I am a nervous wreck in front of him. 

The cards have no longer been dealt in his favor. 

I swung my leg over his, perching on his thigh. I took my thumb and ran it across his face, collecting the decorative icing off his cheek, licking my thumb clean. His eyes tracked my movements, especially when I stuck out my tongue and showed him the mess.

His throat bobbed, and his eyes darkened. 

“Where did that shy, blushing Claudia go?” Harvey’s voice sent a chill down my spine. 

“Away, for now,” I smirked. “There are plenty of versions of Claudia you haven’t met before.”

“And who exactly is this version?” He asked.

“That depends,” I huffed. “Are you going to let me have what I want or are you going to make me earn it?”

Harvey’s hands crept up my thighs, cupping my ass gently. “You’re gonna let me choose?”

“You better choose carefully.”

“And why is that?”

“Because,” I said. “You can either let me take what I want, or try to take what you want. But I’ll let it be known, that isn’t possible. You won’t be able to resist me long enough to uphold that promise.”

“Oh, you think I’m that easy?” Harvey countered, tightening his hold on my body. I let out a whine, enticing him into my game further. 

“I don’t know, Harvey.” I ran my hand down his chest, grinding back and forth on his thigh. I leaned close to his ear, “I can be your every fantasy or your worst nightmare.”

I pulled away from his body, taking a few steps back and towards another hallway. I assumed that’s where his bedroom was, and judging by the screeching of the chair against the floor, I was heading in the right direction. 

The first door I pushed open was, thankfully, the right room. His clothes were hung up neatly in the closet on the opposite side of the room, the city below shining onto the walls. Harvey shut the door quickly, turning on a lamp beside his bed. 

Harvey grinned like the devil and crushed his mouth to mine. I didn’t waste any time letting his tongue tangle with mine. Harvey kissed like the god he was, like a true emperor. He tasted like pure sin, like the cake we were just sharing.

My hands went to the buttons on his shirt, fitting them through the tiny holes and pushing it off his shoulders. 

“Mmm wait, sweetheart,” Harvey broke our lips apart. “I don’t wanna do it this way tonight. Let me take care of you. Please.”

Well, when he sounded like that, who was I to resist him? I let him lay me down, his body between my legs as he placed the most tender kiss on my lips. He moved down my chest, slowly lifting my shirt and placing his mark on my stomach. Up my chest, and my neck. 

“You are so beautiful, Claudia. And I can’t believe I get to have all of you to myself. I can’t wait to make you feel so good.”

I sighed out, letting my eyes close as he explored my body. He was forward with his choices, but he wasn’t ever harsh. He was so soft. So loving and so caring. No one had ever made me feel equally nervous or excited as Harvey did. But now… I wasn’t afraid of him. I don’t think I could ever again. 

“Is it okay if I take these off?” “I wasn’t sure you knew how to ask for permission,” I giggled. He just scowled, but I nodded. “Of course, Harvey. Do whatever you want.” “Don’t-” he swallowed. “Don’t say things like that when I am trying to be sweet and nice to you.”

“I think you’re forgetting that I like it when you manhandle me,” I smiled up to the ceiling before looking at him between my legs. “Sorry, carry on.”

He laid a not so gentle tap to the inside of my thigh before removing my skirt. The chill of the air spread goosebumps across my skin, even more when he placed kisses from my ankle to my hips bone. 

“God I could spend all day between your legs. They’re so perfect,” he praised, spreading them wide so he could fit his torso between them. “You’re so fucking hot, Claudia.” I flushed, beet red, and turned away from him. But his fingers brought me right back. 

“You don’t get to be shy now, sweetheart. Not tonight, let me see all of you.”

“I’m all yours Harvey.” Our eyes locked, and the sparks flew. His lips were on mine, hurried, but not starving. It was intense and passionate and everything I could’ve asked it to be. He lifted my shirt over my head and slipped off my bra from behind. Thankfully his chest was warm against mine.

From one second to the next, Harvey swooped me on top of him and rolled, tugging the sheet with him. When they were freed, he laid me back down and put them over his body. 

“Oh, guess I should get these off,” he grinned, pushing his jeans down his thighs, his briefs going with them. Man… what a sight to behold. Harvey wasn’t shredded, but it was clear his boxing habits kept him in good shape. 

There was something about him that just made me want to crumble and fold. 

Harvey’s lips were hot as they moved all over me, nipping and biting and leaving tiny marks here and there. Before he could lose all his resolve, he reached over to his bedside table and plucked a foil packet from a little jar. Classy. 

“Doing okay, sweetheart?” He smoothed down my hair. 

“Yes, Harvey. I’d be better if…” I locked my legs around his middle, pulling him to me. “You just got on with it.” “Such an impatient little thing,” his grin gave away his facade. 

“Oh please, don’t act like you’re not craving this as much as I am.” “You’re right,” he smirked, lining up and pushing all the way in. a low groan escaped his flushed lips. “But I know you can’t get enough of this.”

I breathed heavily, clinging to him. His hips stirred, slowly pulling back, and sinking all the way in. Harvey rested his head on my shoulder, tongue making patterns on my ignited skin. I tugged at his hair, lips working on their own to find all his sweet spots. 

I raked my nails up his back, not missing when his hips slowed and he moaned. So I did it again. His thumb found its way between my legs and circled around where I wanted it most. He wasn’t kidding when he said he was going to take care of me. 

Harvey took his time, making sure that I was feeling good and got what I wanted. This was so different from the feverish moments we’ve had in the office. But it was somehow way better. Well, it could use one thing.

As he laced our fingers together, I moved our hands up. He stopped kissing me for a moment to give me a puzzled look. But I slipped his grip from mine and placed his hand on my throat. 

“I don’t need you to go all ‘sir’ on me tonight, but just give me this. Please.” I did the best I could with my eyes to lure him in, and it worked. It tightened, but it was never tight. It was just there, a reminder of the part of him I was going to get to see whenever I wanted. 

He started to let his control slip, and I knew it was hard for him to be so gentle. But I appreciated it so much. I let some of my control slip as well, just because I wanted to rile him up. His breath quickened, and so did his hips. His thumb was relentless between my legs and I could feel my high approaching.

“Come on, sweetheart, let go. Make yourself feel so good for me.” There it was, the Harvey that kept me up at night. That has plagued my dreams for the past few days. 

I met his hips with mine, and my release crashed over me when I wasn’t expecting it. I shook in his arms as he continued to move, chasing his own time. 

“Fuck, Harvey,” I gasped. “Let go for me, you did such a good job making me feel good.”

He cursed, tucking his head down momentarily before crushing his mouth to mine, not shy about how I was making him feel. His body went rigid, and the praise streamed out of his mouth.

“Fuck fuck Claudia… god you feel so good. You are so perfect for me. So soft and warm.”

My lips would surely be bruised tomorrow morning, but I didn’t care. All I cared about was being here with Harvey. About carrying him through the aftershocks of his release. I rubbed at his back, kissed his neck and cheeks. When he lifted his head, he had this dreamy look on his face. 

“You look so hot,” he ran his thumb across my cheek, bringing me in for another kiss. “Thank you for giving me a second chance.”

“I’m glad I decided to do it. I can’t decide which Harvey I like more. This one or the one who calls me sweetheart.”

“Did I not call you sweetheart tonight?” “You did, but not the way you do when I call you ‘sir’.”

“Ahh, I see,” he smirked. “As much as I would like to think that I could flip a switch right now, I don’t want to spoil this moment with you.”

“If you don’t want to spoil it, then you should take us into the shower.”

And then I was in the shower. Hot water streaming between us from the rain shower head. His hands were soft as he kneaded my body; they particularly felt nice on my ass, especially when he added his lips to the mix. 

“You are so amazing, Claudia. I cannot stress that enough.” “You’re doing an amazing job,” I smiled, kissing him. “You’re not so bad yourself.”

“I know,” he grinned, smacking my ass before lathering up his hands and running them through my hair. It was hard to not fall asleep standing up. “Sweetheart, if you keep making those noises it is going to be very very hard to not take you right here.”

My eyes flew open, his very apparent arousal pressing into my backside. Well, alright then. Go Claudia, you sexy son of a bitch!

“And who’s to say that I wouldn’t want that?” “I am trying to hold back, you know. I wanted tonight to be different, to be special. I didn’t want it to be heated and rough and-”

“Harvey,” I turned, pressing a hand to his chest. “I know.” “I wanted to ‘make love’ or whatever they call it in those cheesy romance books you read.”

I laughed out loud, picturing Harvey curled up on the couch with a book in his hand, a fire in the fireplace. “Nobody says ‘making love’ any more, babe.” “Babe?” “Yeah, babe. I figured you wouldn’t like sugar, or honey bun, or baby for that matter.”

“Don’t make me sound older than I am, please. For fucks sake I passed the Bar when you were in highschool.”

“It doesn’t bother me all that much anymore,” I admitted, wrapping my arms around his neck. “I thought it would, but it doesn’t really make a difference to me.”

“Good, I’m glad it doesn’t freak you out,” he smiled. “And, for the record, I hope it doesn’t freak your folks out.”

“It won’t.”

He lifted up a brow, “How could you know?” “Because I already told them about you.” I felt him go tight. “Relax. They knew who you were already and they couldn’t have been more excited that I found a caring, respectful, well respected man.”

He let out a sigh, “and your brothers?” “They don’t know yet, but don’t worry about them, either. It will be okay.”

“When did you become the consoling one? It’s weird.” “I know, right?” I giggled. When I looked into his eyes, there was a fondness to his gaze. He was looking at my body, but not in a way he had before. “Why are you looking at me like that?” Harvey shrugged, “I just love you so much, Claudia. And I am so proud of how far you’ve come in just these first couple of months.”

My heart hitched in my chest, then beat so wildly I wasn’t entirely sure it didn’t burst through my skin and land in his hands. I froze. Mike had been right. Harvey wasn’t just some cock, high strung New York attorney that couldn’t decipher his own feelings. He seemed incredibly in tune with his emotions and that couldn’t be more attractive. 

I just kissed him. I didn’t know what else to do other than kiss him. He had to take a step back to support our combined weight. Harvey’s arms were strong around my waist, his lips reassuring and just as firm as his grip. 

“I love you too, Harvey. So fucking much.”

____

The comforters pulled tight, Harvey's body pressed behind mine… I couldn’t think of a more relaxing way to end the night. Especially after I slipped to my knees in the shower and showed him just how much I loved him. 

“You don’t know how long I’ve been dreaming about having you in my arms one night. All night long.”

I hummed, scooting back so his chest met my back, his legs molding with mine. “I may have fantasized about it once or twice as well.” “Have you now?” “Again, there are several versions of Claudia you haven’t met before.” “And I look forward to coaxing every single one of them out with my mouth… my tongue… my hands… my-”

“Tomorrow,” I whispered, letting my eyes lull shut. “We can do it all again tomorrow. On the table, on the counter, on the couch-” “You’re not helping the situation here, you know,” he tugged at my half-dried hair. “Don’t get me started, sweetheart. I just might not let you get any sleep tonight.”

I clenched my thighs together. This was going to be such a sweet, tortuous game to play. And I got to play it every day. Every night, if I wanted. He wouldn’t be able to resist me. I had a secret weapon.

“Whatever you say, sir.”

His hand was wrapped around my throat, forcing my head to turn back to look at him. He clicked his tongue, eyes more awake than they had been a few minutes ago. “Oh sweet, innocent little Claudia. I guess you haven’t learned your lesson yet. It’s okay, I’d be happy to give you more instruction. I think I recall saying that eventually I would break you down over and over again until all you could remember was my name and how to breathe. Well, sweetheart. What do you think? Because I think you can still form coherent thoughts. I think it’s time we change that, don’t you?” I nodded, “Yes.”

His grip tightened and tightened and tightened. “Yes what?”

I smirked, climbing into his lap and taking him into my hand. “Yes, sir.”

[missdawnandherdusk]

The Witness

The Case The Defendant

Summary: This case was getting more complicated the more you looked into it. Who was Draco Malfoy?

A/n: I'm so glad you guys are excited about this, because honestly it's a lot of fun to write. Also I have a friend who's in law school right now and I definitely texted him for help about what the heck a lawyer does. That was a fun conversation. Anyway... enjoy!

Realizing that no one present at the supposed murder of Dumbledore (by Draco) was still alive, I wanted to scream. All I had were a few character witnesses--some of which were now also dead, or worse irrelevant. But there were two witnesses who answered my letters who agreed to meet and talk about a boy they knew all those years ago...

Her bright blue eyes were almost grey as she looked at me with inquisitive wonder. Luna Lovegood still looked childlike, though we were both hitting our twenties.

“You were assigned Draco’s case?” She asked dreamily.

“Yes,” I sighed, looking through previous notes. 

“That must be difficult for you. He is not an easy man.” 

“No,” I agreed. “Thank you for meeting with me. It really does help,” 

“Of course. I didn’t think my statements would be taken seriously. But you’ve always been so kind and understanding.” 

My smile was tight as I began. “Can you in your own words give a character witness for Draco Malfoy.” 

“Yes,” she smiled. “Draco Malfoy was a Slytherin as they come. He was always with his friends in the halls and excelled in quidditch and potions. He told me not to tell anyone but, he did offer me a dance at the Yule ball fourth year. He was so kind.” 

My eyes flashed up from my notes so curious. 

“He what?”

“He asked me to dance,” Luna repeated. “And when I was imprisoned at the manor that last year he always brought me my food and made sure it was warm and more than I needed.” 

“He…” this was new information not on file. I was absolutely baffled by what she was saying. My quill flew across the page. “Luna why didn’t you say any of this before?”

“I did. But I told you—no one would listen.” She tilted her head. “Do these things matter?” 

“Everything matters. Can you tell me more about your last two years of Hogwarts? And more about the Manor?” I leaned forward intrigued. 

“Certainly,” she nodded and spoke calmly and softly about the horrors of war that plagued our schooling. I had to disassociate myself so that I wouldn’t trigger my own panic attack of things I kept deep and buried inside of my psyche. 

“Draco was supposed to practice the Cruciatus curse on me. But he never did.” Luna said. And with her large round eyes she stared directly into my soul. “Draco isn’t capable of murder.” 

And when she said those words I believed them. 

“Thank you for your time Luna,” I set down my quill. “I have all that I need.”

“Please reach out if you need more I know this case is a big deal for you. And I want to see you both free.” 

“Thank you,” I said a little softer. “I’ll um… I’ll let you know,” 

Lune got up to leave and I sat back, trying to make sense of what she just told me. Draco being kind? Until now I didn’t have a doubt that he was wicked, capable of terrible things. Luna painted a different picture. One no one had bothered to paint before. One that would be torn to shreds by my next witness. 

Hermione Weasley walked through the door. I stood, smiling and greeting her. 

“So, you got stuck with Malfoy’s case,” She sympathized. 

“Yeah,” I chuckled shaking my head. “It had to be me didn’t it?” 

She laughed. “It always was,” Her face became more serious. “So, do you think he did it? Or do you think he’s innocent?” 

“I don’t know,” It was the honest truth. “I just need to close the case no matter the outcome.” 

“Right, your board exams,” 

I nodded. “So, tell me about what you know of the character of Draco Malfoy.” 

“You know as well as I do. We went to school together.” 

“For the record,” I insisted. 

Hermione pursed her lips before starting. “He always insulted me. Was always trying to get us into trouble. Merlin’s sake fifth year he helped what terror in pink Umbridge. His father was a Death Eater. His entire family was.”

“Right yes,” I muttered, scribbling it all down. 

“Draco Malfoy is the worst kind of person.” Hermione said bluntly.

“Agreed. But Hermione,” I looked her in the eyes. “Do you think he’s capable of murder? Killing someone? Actually taking a life?” My question was testing whether or not Luna’s painting was physical or simply a mirage. 

Hermione paused and sat back in her chair. 

“It’s one thing to be a shitty person. It’s another thing to be a killer.” I said. “So, do you believe he could actually do it?”

Hermione shook her head once like she couldn’t stand the thought of admitting it to anyone. She sighed. 

“No, I don’t think he’s a murderer. Giant prick yes. But not a killer,”

“Okay. I have one last question.” She nodded me on. “What can you tell me about that Easter at Malfoy Manor?” 

Hermione’s eyes glossed over as her hand covered her left forearm protectively. 

“I don’t want to talk about it,” She said with a small voice, curling in on herself. 

“I know it’s a hard topic and Merlin I wouldn’t ask unless it was important.” My eyes met hers, pleading. “But I need to know. Not all of it. Just about Draco,” 

Hermione took a deep breath and recounted that day. I lined up her words with what Luna had told me. Draco was there… but he wasn’t directly involved. 

And he had helped Harry.

It was a small minute way, but it was something… it might have been enough to confirm that there was some sort of light at the end of this tunnel. 

“I… I never really thought about it. Draco… helped us.” Hermione frowned. “Y/n… I—I can’t believe I—the reason we escaped the Manor was because Dobby was there… how did Dobby…?” 

“Can you explain?” I leaned forward. 

“Dobby aperated us out of there. He was killed by Bellatrix, but he saved us. But I have no idea how he knew that we were there or that we needed help.” Her eyes went wide. I caught her thoughts. 

“Do you think Draco might have…?” 

“I… I don’t know. I… I never saw him again. He wasn’t there. At the final battle. He and his mother. They left. That’s what I heard.” 

“Alright. Thank you,” I finished up my notes. “Is there anything else you want on record?” 

Hermione was lost in her own little world. Trying to come to grips with the idea that Draco might not have been the worst sort of person. Merlin, I was doing the same thing. 

“Hermione?” I asked. 

“Hmm? Oh, no, nothing else,” She gave a little smile. “Um. Would you ask Draco about it?” 

“Yeah,” I promised. “Yeah I will.” 

Getting home, I felt like I had two different cases on my hands. The one given to me, painting the murder of a great wizard by a death eater in a war; and the other, of a fellow classmate navigating a war the best he could in a cold world he lived in. 

Did Draco actually kill Dumbledore?

The question kept me awake until the early morning. I had to ask him. I had so many questions for him. But they would all have to wait. 

Dr. Dresden was waiting for me first. 

I entered his office. I had no idea what to tell him. It was robotic: my retelling of my meetings with Draco, Luna, and Hermione. 

“Very good.” Was all he said, not one emotion evident on his face. I was too distracted to care or scrutinize his words. 

Before I left, a question pinned me to the little seat in front of his desk. 

“Professor, can I ask you something?” 

He nodded. 

“When I came in here, last week, I said there was a problem with this case and you agreed… what problem do you have with this case?” 

“Ah, now you ask an important question,” He almost smiled. “My dear, I have seen thousands of cases in my day. And most are cut and dry, but a few fall in the grey area where it is our job to separate the tones. And this case has never been more black and white—and yet the Ministry deems it grey.” 

I began to unravel what he meant. And he was right. If the ballistics didn’t match the statement it shouldn’t matter—Draco should be acquitted. 

“So…” I started. “Why haven’t they set him free?” 

“That lies, my dear, with Mr. Harry Potter.” Dr. Dresden said quite seriously. 

.

The Auror

.

masterlist

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@coffee-addicti @msmcsmutt @ravn-87 @artemismohr18@whygz@crazywritingbug @bitemebro522 @zombiesnips-blog@savingdraco  @akari180 @slytherin-emerald @queenfeatherwings @fanficflaneuse @go-whovian-universe @spicyshenanigans @darling-im-not-okay-i-promise @katsukink @takemetothekingdom @strangerr-things @tmnt-queen@hxneybgb @belcvayelena @moviesbooksandfandoms   @cocochanelthepupper @ninacotte @braelynn-johnston  @jiggllyy @darcypotter-blog  @thiccheerioss@lottie289 @beautiful-pegasus@tceedlmao @anonymous034 @bi-andready-tocry @dragonsandbread @the-queen-of-hell-things @alienmotel  @oh-itsnothing @sunflowerxsadnessw @fattycooter @fanficsigottaread @gweaslvy @strawberriesonsummer @gaysludge @ray-of-sunrise @artist-bby @shadowsingeraxolotl @quillsareforwriting @wollymalfoy @lilpieceoftoast @paper-cats @floweryjh @hufflautia @livize75 @annie-mcl @riathearora @dudeimnotgonnakms @auriuswolve @carolineesnell

[justmeinadaze]

We're A Family Part 6 (Steddie X You)

A/N: Good morning. I have not slept yet. Why I do not know lol But alas...I bare you this with many an answered question and some disgustingly adorable fluff.

Enjoy! <3

Warnings: Smut, Fluff, and slight angst, Some complex emotions here with the reader feeling overwhelmed. Minimal Charlie drama. Um, I think that's it.

Word Count: 3553

Kierra rubs you back as you lean over the crib you two had been looking at. 

“Sweetie, it’s ok.”

“I know. I just…walking into the office and saying ‘paternity’… watching their faces as they poked them… It feels wrong.”

“It’s not wrong, Y/N. What is wrong is charging $800 for a crib.” You laugh as she flashes you the price tag and pushes you forward to the next one. Your eyes flick to Steve who’s across the store with Dylan looking at baby clothes. 

Someone suddenly bumps into your side and you immediately apologize, closing your mouth when you see who it is. 

“I’m…I’m sorry. I really didn’t…”, Vivian stumbled over her words.

“No, um, it’s fine.”

She smiles looking at the items in her hands before quickly hiding them. “I’m not…I swear…my sister is pregnant so we’re getting stuff for the baby shower.”

“We?”

“Well look at you, Y/N.” You roll your eyes as Charlie comes into view. “I heard a rumor you were pregnant but I didn’t believe it.”

“Yup. Because what man would want to make love and start a family with me?!”

His eyes narrowed at your sarcastic tone. “Your lawyer talk to you yet?”

“Charlie! To what do we owe the pleasure?” Eddie came up beside you and your sister as he politely nods a hello to Vivian. 

“As you can see, I’m talking to Y/N here.”

“And as you can see this isn’t a courthouse and your lawyers aren’t here so feel free to be on your way.”

“Ok. Alright now.” Steve came from behind your ex and stepped between them making you panic as you looked around for Dylan. His little eyes met yours from his place behind Vivian and your heart broke. “Let’s not do this in the middle of a baby supply store in front of Dylan.”

Charlie searched for him, beaming down at the boy. “Hey Dil. How are you doing, kid?”

Vivian called after him as he ran in the opposite direction and you disconnected from the group to follow him. You found your son sitting on a piece of display furniture with his head hung down to his chest. Pulling over a rocking chair, you sit beside him as you lightly rock back and forth. 

“When you were a baby, we had a chair kind of like this one, and every time you cried, one of us would hold you as we rocked. It worked every time. No one believed me either! ‘Every time? No way!’”

You smiled at him as you noticed him doing the same.

“I would do that now but I don’t think with my belly the three of us could fit up here.”

Dylan glanced at you as he took in the chair you were sitting in before scooting over and patting the seat beside him. As soon as you sat down, he curled up into your side as you wrapped your arms around his shoulders, pressing his head to your chest. Pushing off on your toes, you rocked the seat you both were in as the boy started to cry.

“I know, baby. I know.”

Kierra sits in the chair beside you, looking at you both with empathetic eyes. “They left…without incident and, um, the boys bought one of the cribs I told them you said you like so…they are taking it to the car and then bringing it around since it started to rain.”

“Thank you. Come on, weirdo. Let’s go home.”

#############

“I wish you had told me about this relationship, Y/N.”, Lidia sighed as she chugged the glass of whiskey Steve had brought to her. “I mean, this entire thing is bullshit anyway.” She holds up the court documents for emphasis before sliding them across the table. “This environment is way better for him than his fathers.”

“What does she do?”, Eddie asked.

“Right now, nothing. Just focus on your pregnancy and we’ll go from there. I imagine after she gets here, they’ll focus more on time and money when it comes to Dylan and the three of you.”

Their eyes followed you as you slowly rose from the table and without saying a word headed up the stairs. After your lawyer left, they found you in the baby’s room, sitting against the wall as you began assembling her crib. 

“Honey…” Steve descended to the floor as Eddie followed. You continued the task in front of you as tears gradually began to fall. One of the pieces you were holding wouldn’t connect with its corresponding part making you frustrated as you slammed them to the ground in anger. The man pushed them to the side as he tried collecting you in his arms. 

“No! No. Just… no.”

“Ok. That’s okay, baby.” Your phone in the bedroom began to ring and Eddie quickly got to his feet to see who it was. “We’re right here. Everything’s going to be okay.”

“Um…it’s the doctor’s office.” Eddie’s eyes met Steve’s, unsure of what he should do. 

“Y/N, we’re going to turn on the speaker and you just talk.”

You nodded as the metalhead got back down, holding the phone between you three. 

“Hey, Y/n!”, the doctor greeted in a happy tone. “How are you and Aurora feeling?”

“We’re alright. Just exhausted.”

“I can imagine. Well, I won’t keep you long. I just wanted to tell you that the paternity test did come back at about 97% probability. When it comes to pre-birth tests, depending on the number, sometimes I suggest another after the baby is born but I don’t see any reason here. It seems Edward Munson is little Aurora’s biological father.”

Eddie exhaled heavily as he dropped the phone to the floor. 

“Hey doc, this is Steve. Thanks for giving us a call. We’ll call you back tomorrow if we have any more questions.” Before the man could say anything, Steve hung up the phone. “What’s going on, guys. What are we feeling?”

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”

His large palms reached over to cup your face. “Y/N, listen to me. This changes absolutely nothing. She is OURS. Mine and Eddie’s. I love her with every fiber of my being and I love you to.”

The metalhead wiped his eyes before extending his arms, pulling you into a hug. “Thank you.”

You lean back, looking at him with total confusion. “I just… I spent most of my life being called trash. The only other girl we were serious with said she never wanted to have any of my kids. I was so sure she was Steve’s. It never even really sunk in that biologically she could be mine. I…I never thought this would ever happen for me…to have a little me running around.”

He pulled your lips to his and you allowed it as you kissed him back.

“I’m sorry for…me.”, you laughed as you explained. “The other day with Charlie in the baby store, just seeing my son so heartbroken… and then this custody bullshit. I don’t want to put him through that. I’m tired of him and you guys always…fighting. Dylan fighting to have the dad he wants from Charlie and you two always fight for me when it comes to him, Steve’s dad, my mom. Add in this…”, you gesture to your phone. “It killed me watching you take that test. I feel like the four of us haven’t had any time to breathe since I got pregnant. I feel like we aren’t as happy as we used to be.”

##########

“Um, where are we going?”, you scanned outside your window when you realized Steve wasn’t headed back home. 

“You’ll see.”

You knew that grin. He and Eddie were definitely up to something. “Weirdo, do you know what they are up to?”

“Uh, no. Not this time.”

“Excuse me, sweetheart. The child isn’t always the brain trust of our mischievous deeds.” You giggle as you lean back in your seat and accept your fate. 

As Steve pulls into a parking lot, Eddie points to the building. “Kid, what does that say?”

“Hawkins Ak-war-e-um?”

The metalhead grinned as he ruffled his hair, your head whipped around to look at them. “Hawkins Aquarium?”

The other man smiled as he got out of the car, running around to help you out on your side. “We thought you were right. The four of us haven’t gone out to have some fun in a while.”

Dylan’s eyes grew as you guys stepped inside, taking in all the gigantic tanks around him. He gripped your hand and pulled you further inside as the guys lingered back to pay. 

“Wow. I never would have guessed Hawkins had anything like this.”

“Honestly, we didn’t either. A quick google search informed me otherwise.”, Steve smiled. Eddie lightly pushed your son and both boys ran down a long hallway. “Jesus, I’m telling you, honey. We’re going to have three kids in the house.”

You playfully slap his chest as you two follow after them. “Steve? How, um, how are you really feeling about…everything with Aurora?”

His fingers intertwine with yours as he sighs. “Y/N, I meant what I said the other day. She’s both of ours and I still love her. Now that we know, at least next time, we can use my… you know.”

You giggle up at him as he blushes. “Mr. I talk dirty in bed can’t say the word sperm?”

“Yeah, yeah. Calm down.” Steve’s smile grows as he leans down to kiss your lips. “Plus, did you see how happy Eddie was? Fucking Emily and his parents made him think anything from the Munson gene would be garbage.” His nostrils flare as he shakes his head. 

You watch as the metalhead lifts Dylan into his arms as they point at the glass. “Mom, look.”

A whine escapes your lips as you notice a shark swim by. “Ew. What was that?”, Eddie laughed. 

“I don’t like sharks. My dad showed us Jaws at the wrong age.”

“Jaws. With the fake ass, mechanical shark?”

 “I know. It doesn’t even look real.”, Dylan giggles.

You turn to glare at Steve with a joke-filled annoyed face. “So, yeah, I told Robin he might be too young but she insisted it wasn’t scary. He did fine though!”

“Oh my god. You two are the worst.”

“Me?! Why am I being lumped in with him?”, Eddie whines. 

“Because! I’m sure you did something. I know it.”

###############

After you guys got home the boys announced they had one more surprise, demanding you and Dylan close your eyes as they guided you both up the stairs. 

“Ok, you two, open ‘em.”

Your jaw dropped as your son gasped in excitement. Eddie and Steve had led you into the baby’s now finished room. They had completed painting the walls a light shade of pink before lining it with different mementos of the family. By her completely assembled crib, hung the Corroded Coffin banner you remembered had previously hung in Eddie’s room at the trailer. Along the other walls were posters for movies Steve had actually seen including The Princess Bride and Sleeping Beauty. 

Next to a bookshelf in the corner, they had painted a simplified version of the Hogwarts logo from Harry Potter along with every family member name and the house they belonged to according to Dylan. Inside the shelf itself, there were books and photos of the entire family including Kierra, Wayne, and Robin. In another corner, boxes were leaning against the wall.

“Yeah, we haven’t gotten to set those up yet. That’s, uh, changing table and a rocking chair, I believe. Kid said we had to get a chair like that.” Dylan beamed up at Eddie as he spoke. 

“I think now all we need is a basinet, highchair, and whatever those bouncy chair things are you can sit them in.”

“Bouncy chair thing…” Steve rolls his eyes as he reaches over to punch the boy’s arm. “Oh! And a car seat. Your sister said she knew someone who had a spare so she would bring it by later.” 

“Do…do you like it, babe?” When you turned to answer him, the tears were already free flowing down your cheeks. “Oh, honey.”, he chuckles as he reaches for you and you collapse in his arms. 

“What about you, dude? Do you like it? You can cry to if you want. I won’t tell anyone.” Eddie chuckles when Dylan makes a face at him. 

“I think it’s really cool. Ro is going to love it.

#############

“Hey!” Steve playfully exclaims as he comes into the bedroom to find you and Eddie passionately kissing. “No ‘let’s wait for Steve’ or nothin’!”

You grin up at him as the metalhead’s lips trail away from yours down to you neck. Grabbing his shirt, you yank him to the bed, bringing his mouth to yours. “Thank you for today. It was so nice seeing Dylan smile like that again.”

“It was nice seeing you smile like that again to.”, Eddie adds as he sits up on one of his elbows. 

“Um, excuse me. Who told you to stop kissing me?” They both laugh as he kisses your cheek. 

“I’m going to be honest here. I really want to fuck you but I also really have no idea how with the…”, he gestures to your belly. 

“Well, you see, Eds. You take that big, long thing below your waist and stick it—”

“Ay! Yeah, yeah, sweetheart. Thanks for the sass.”

“You just have to promise to be honest, honey, okay? If we’re hurting you or you feel like you need a break…”

“I promise.” Steve smiles as he starts removing his clothes. “Can I have you both?”

They glance at each other worriedly. “Is it…can we?”, Eddie asks. 

“I can lay on my side…”

The metalhead grins as he climbs off the bed and takes off his sweatpants before gradually removing your sleepwear, lips gently caressing your baby bump as you run your fingers through his hair. A small squeak of surprise leaves his body as he feels his legs being pulled towards the end of the mattress. 

Steve smirks as he descends to his knees and takes Eddie’s cock into his mouth, flattening his tongue as he takes the boy all the way down to the back of his throat. 

“Yes, Steve. Jesus.” 

Sucking on the pads of your fingers, you bring them to your clit as you moan watching them. Eddie cranes his neck to watch you, licking his lips at the sight. “Come here, baby.” He pats beside him but you hesitate as he reaches to adjust you over his face. 

“Eddie…I… I’m too heavy.”

“Y/N, I love you but shut up. You are NOT too heavy.”, he giggles as he guides you on top of him. “Plus, if this is the way I’m meant to go than I will be the coolest guy in heaven.”

Before you can even respond, his tongue licks a long stripe through your folds. You balance your hands on his chest as he groans into your body. 

“Fuck, princess. You taste different. Sweeter. Oh my god.” His tongue invades your entrance, driving you crazy as your eyes roll back. You whimper his name, feeling yourself clench around him. Eddie’s hips thrust up causing Steve to gag and cling to the man’s thighs. 

He flicks his eyes up to you and you flash him a tiny smile as you grind your hips on the metalhead’s face. His thumb reaches up to rub fast circles on to your clit and you immediately cover your mouth, suppressing the need to scream his name. 

Gnawing on your bottom lip, your body shutters as you cum. Mewling as Eddie runs his tongue back and forth, licking you clean. You carefully slide off him as Steve climbs up his body to kiss the man’s lips. 

They place themselves on either side of you, tenderly kissing any part of your skin they can reach. Eddie grips your hips as he guides himself into your ass, Steve carefully watching your face before lifting your leg and holding your thigh in his hand before sliding into your entrance.

You whimper at the feeling of them as they slowly begin to thrust into you, your head resting on the pillow as it suffocates your moans. 

“You…you okay, Y/N?”, Steve pants. 

“Yeah, I’m—mmm—I’m alright. Feels…so good.” Eddie sweaty forehead falls against your shoulder as his hips roll, pushing himself deeper into you. “F-fuck, Eddie, baby. Like that.”

Your hands reach forward as you cling to the other man’s neck, leaving a trail of kisses along his jawline. “Steve, you… you can go a little faster. Please… please…I’m almost…”

When he does as you request, you feel as if your entire body is going to explode. A sweaty palm flew over your mouth as your head tilted backwards, moaning loudly as you came. Eddie came with you, grunting into your shoulder as he thrust ropes of his seed into you, wrapping his arms around your front to hold you to his chest.

Steve followed shortly after, his forehead falling to your own as his rhythm slowed, breathing silent moans onto your face as he came inside you. After pulling his cock out, he gently lowered your leg and rolled onto his back. When he turned his head to look at you, your eyes were closed but he knew you were still awake because your hand was tenderly stroking Eddie’s arm that was still clinging to you above your belly. 

As for the man himself, all he saw was tussled hair that had fallen over your shoulder. 

“You still alive, Munson?”

“Mhmm… just in heaven.” His answer made you laugh. 

“Do I have to take a bath?”, you whined. Steve took that as his cue as he got up and headed for the bathroom, grabbing a rag to clean you with. “Thank you…for today.”

“You already thanked us, honey.”

“Well, I’m thanking you again!”

#############

4 Months Later

“Thank you for calling Family Video. This is Steve. How can I—”

“Steven!”

“Kierra? What’s wrong?!”

“Y/N’s water broke. We’re headed to the hospital. Get the other dork and get over here!”

“Kierra…be nice…”, your heavy breathing echoing in the background. “I love you!”

Steve hangs up the phone and practically jumps over the counter. “Whoa, Harrington! Where’s the fire?”

“Y/N’s in labor. I gotta…” She chuckles as he points to the door.

“Go! Send me a picture!”

The man gets in his car and speeds down the thankfully empty Hawkins streets to the mechanic shop to pick up Eddie who dives into the car the moment it pulls up. 

They race to the hospital, your sister giggling as they skid down the hallway. “She’s in that room over there. Go be with your wife and I’m going to go get Dylan. He’s got a sister to meet.”

##########

With half lidded eyes, you smile as Eddie holds Aurora in his arms, his finger holding her tiny hand. A big toothy grin spreads across his face when he looks up and sees you and Steve watching him with adoration. 

“Shut up.”, he chuckles. 

“Mom?” Dylan runs to your bed as Steve lifts him up so he can hug you. “Are you ok?”

“Yeah, weirdo. I’m just tired.”

“Ohhhhh…look at my niece.” Kierra starts to tear up as she sits beside the metalhead and runs her finger gently along the baby’s cheeks. 

“Do you want to hold her?”, he asks.

“I do but I promised Dylan he could first.” She kisses Eddie’s cheek before he carefully stands and comes to your side. You position him so he’ll be more comfortable and the man slowly lowers her into his little arms. He smiles as Steve takes a picture. 

“She’s so small.”

“Pfft, she didn’t feel that way.”, you giggle as you lean back against the pillow.

“When does she get hair like Steve’s?”

“Oh, dude, I’m afraid she’s going to have hair like mine unless we pray really hard she gets your mom’s gorgeous locks.” Eddie lightly messes his curls making your son laugh. 

Dylan and Kierra stayed for a while before heading back home, your sister offering to watch him so the boys could stay with you. Wayne and Robin were going to come by sometime tomorrow and for that you were thankful, desperately ready to get some sleep. 

Eddie had already beat you to it, curling up in the chair by the window. Steve, however, was fully alert as he kept an eye on you waiting for you to finish feeding her so he could put her in their makeshift crib. 

“Steve? I wanted to wait till everyone was gone before I said anything…”

“What’s wrong, baby?”

“Nothing. I just…you haven’t held her yet.”

“Yeah, I know. I just thought…you know…Eddie should and then Dylan—”

“Steve”, you interrupted. “I know your scared. It’s okay. I promise…you’re not alone, remember? She loves you.”

He held out his hands as you lean forward and place the baby in his arms. “Hey, Ro. I, uh, I don’t know if you remember my voice but…”

Her mouth opens as a small coo emits from her lips. Steve shoulders start to relax as she turns her head towards his chest. 

“I’m one of your daddies.” 

############

@adequate-superstar @kalinaselennespeaks @luna-munson83

@notasimp4joey @manda-panda-monium @decadentwombatmiracle

@katie-tibo @marsupiooo @local-stoner-bitch @steamystrangerfics

@lunatictardis @actuallyspencerreid @moviefreak1205

@waylandmorgernsternherondal-blog @kik51199

@strngrlytn @idkidknemore @damon-loves-pie @k-k0129

@micheledawn1975 @eddie86baby

@justmeandmymeanderingthoughts @3rriberri

@sashaphantomhive @chelebelletx @big-ope-vibes @munsonzzgf

[ejzah]

A/N: Well, after more than two years, this story is slowly coming to a close.

***

In Miss Blye’s Class, Part 37

The start of summer break meant more late nights and juggling of the different schedules. Deeks tried not to leave Caleb with his sitter too often, so he took him to the office whenever possible. When she wasn’t teaching college classes, Kensi also offered to stay with Caleb some of the time, insisting that it wouldnt be any trouble.

They spent the majority of their time outside of work together. More often than not, Kensi ended up at Deeks’ house, but she was getting a little more comfortable with letting him into her apartment, messiness aside.

Today, Deeks had a late meeting with a new client that kept him in the office until after six. He knew Caleb was fine and perfectly happy with Kensi, but he missed them both.

“Wow, you really are whipped, aren’t you?” Talia mused, when she found him hurriedly packing up his bag. As usual, she made herself at home, plopping in his desk chair.

“Yep. You jealous?”

“As if.” She scoffed at the suggestion, but Deeks noticed she shifted a little uncomfortably.

“That reminds me, how are things going with Sabatino? I heard he took you to that swanky little Japanese place,” Deeks said.

“Oh no, we are not talking about my love life.”

“Which implies that there’s a love life to talk about.”

“God, I hate lawyers,” she sighed. “So, what are you and the teacher doing tonight?”

“You could call her Kensi, you know,” Deeks reminded her without any heat.

“Eh, that’s no fun.”

“We’re going to a movie in the park. They’ve got some food trucks around and free popcorn. Caleb’s super excited.”

“How domestic,” Talia drawled.

“You’re welcome to come if you want,” Deeks offered. He imagined Talia sitting on a blanket in the grass and nearly snorted.

“Thanks, but I’m more of a IMAX kind of girl.” Tilting her head, she gave him a genuine smile. “You know, I don’t usually do the whole sappy, lovey-dovey thing—”

“Oh and here I thought the tongue girl thing was just an act,” he interrupted, and she flashed him a scowl, jabbing her finger at him.

“Hush. I’m being genuine here.” Without missing a beat, she continued, “I’m glad that you found someone who makes you this happy. You and Caleb deserve it.”

“Well, thanks, Talia.”

“Not to mention, I was getting really sick of your mopey, single father act.”

“As always, I feel so loved,” he said, slipping the strap of his bag over his head and settling it firmly on his shoulder. “See you later.”

***

The park was pretty full by the time Kensi, Deeks, and Caleb got themselves together, but they managed to find a nice square of grass to lay a blanket on and a couple chair. Predictably, Caleb has zero interest in staying put or the snacks Deeks had packed. He’d already eaten a taco, cheese sticks, and a snow cone and now was running back and forth at the back of the plot with a couple of other children.

He glanced over at Kensi, who sat cross-legged, her knee brushing against his, steadily working her way through a bag of trail mix. She dropped her head on his shoulder, tracking Caleb’s progress across the ground. He tumbled to the ground with an overly dramatic grunt and giggled when one of his new friends fell on top of him.

“You think he’ll make it to the movie?” she asked.

“Eh, I give it 50/50 odds. Especially if the sugar crash kicks in soon.”

“If he does fall asleep, then we can snuggle.”

“Nothing stopping us from snuggling now,” Deeks said. Wrapping his arms around Kensi’s waist, he fell back, taking her with him. Kensi went easily, tucking her legs through his and wriggling closer.

“Mm, this is nice,” she sighed. “I’m glad we don’t have to worry about someone seeing us and getting upset.”

“Yeah, you don’t want to mess with those PTO ladies,” he joked, and he felt Kensi snort against his cheek.

“Oh yeah, they’re terrifying.” She kissed the edge of his jaw. “You had those women eating out of your hands.” Deeks shrugged modestly at the assessment.

Moving around, Kensi made herself comfortable on his chest. Deeks closed his eyes, basking in the moment.

“How was class today?” he asked, eyes still closed. She’d just started a new section that would last eight weeks long, along with two other sections that ran for the majority of the summer.

“I have three students who could probably teach the class better than me, a bunch of athletic kids who have zero interest in learning Spanish during the summer, and then a handful who either seem genuinely engaged or at least want to pass,” Kensi answered.

He opened his eyes so he could look down at the top of Kensi’s head.

“Hey, don’t group all the athletic kids together. I played hockey and basketball in high school and I loved my foreign language class.”

Without lifting her head, Kensi added, “One of the football players fell asleep five minutes in and another tried to sneak in during the last five minutes just so he could take the quiz.”

“Ok, maybe they’re not the most dedicated of students,” Deeks allowed with a chuckle. “Are you still enjoying it at least?”

“Yes.” Kensi nodded into his shoulder. “Plus there’s the added benefit of getting paid.”

“Always nice.”

“How was the visitation yesterday? Caleb told me you were all going to a museum, but I didn’t get a chance to ask him about it today,” Kensi said.

Deeks sighed, his good mood slightly dampened by the mention of Monica.

According to their updated visitation contract, Monica had shown up at the library at the first week exactly at the time they’d agreed on beforehand. The entire visit, she’d been pleasant and engaged with Caleb, and he seemed to sincerely enjoy himself. However, Deeks had the sense she’d been trying to prove something as well. Or maybe that was just his bias and bitterness speaking. The next visit, she’d been 20 minutes late and the most recent one…

“She didn’t come.”

Kensi pushed up on his chest and gave him an incredulous look.

“I know,” he said, interpreting her expression. Even though he’d known it could be a possibility, he’d still be furious when they waited over an hour before she finally sent a short text saying she couldn’t make it.

“How was Caleb?”

“He seems to take it alright.” Deeks shrugged and shook his head, eyes flicking to Caleb playing. “I mean, he was disappointed at first, but after a little bit, he said he’d seen her another time. I did offer to let her come tomorrow instead, but she hasn’t responded yet.”

“I can’t believe it.” He heard the anger he felt in her voice. She snaked an arm up his chest to cup his cheek. “I’m sorry. Are you ok?”

“Yeah. I was furious in the moment. Now,” he shrugged. “I’m reigned to who Monica is. I can’t change that. I just hope Caleb doesn’t get too confused.”

“We’ll take it one day at a time,” Kensi said. He rolled her use of “we” around in his head, the thought of them working together as a unit, and smiled.

“I like the sound of that,” he murmured, kissing the side of Kensi’s head.

A few minutes later, the opening credits of the movie started, and Caleb made his way back to their blanket. He threw himself on top of them, wedging his little body between them.

“Oof, call your shots, kiddo!”

They rearranged themselves into a more comfortable configuration, settling down to watch the movie. With one arm behind Kensi’s back, and Caleb snuggled firmly between them, he knew this was true happiness.

[laurel-finch]

'I Don't Bite' S1.Ch07: The Real Monsters

Summary: The team works together to save Sam, but they incur a heavy cost... Referenced Episodes: mentioned S1 E6 "Skin," S1 E15 "The Benders" CW: Gore! Lore dump! Kidnapping. Word Count: 6150 Recommended Song: Crazy Train -- Ozzy Osbourne Previous Chapter -- Masterlist -- Next Chapter

“Why can’t I just pretend to be anything else?”

“I don’t have a state police ID for you, and they won’t just let some random civilian in on the investigation.”

"Dean, I don't think they're going to believe this."

"What? Why wouldn't they?"

"I don't exactly look like a police dog," I huffed, hardly believing that he had faith in this plan. "No one is going to believe that an off-duty cop and his 'wolf-dog' – who, by the way, is bigger than a Great Dane – are here to investigate the sudden disappearance of his cousin, who just so happens to be related to a known murderer that you look exactly like." I inhaled heavily, having said it all in one breath. Dean raised an eyebrow at this, a light smirk on his features.

"A little positivity wouldn’t hurt!" he exclaimed with a cheesy grin my way. He threw the car door open and stepped into the bright morning sunlight. I sputtered and he made his way around the Impala to the passenger's side door, opening it for me. With a small glare, I jumped out of the car and landed lightly on my paws. I straightened myself and shook out my fur to bask in the warm light.

"See? You're not that wolfish, this'll work like a charm!" I did my very best to glare up at Dean, the top of my head even with his chest. "Don't give me that look."

I huffed and turned away from him, making my way toward the police station. He followed, keeping up with my lanky strides.

"Maybe you should wag your tail for a better effect," he said. I snapped my furred head to his and pulled back pink gums to reveal deadly fangs. "I'll take that as a no." He said with a chuckle.

The waiting room of the police station was rather small, with only a few couches, a small coffee table, a TV showing the local weather, and a tall, fake plant standing in the corner. I surveyed the rooms, earning strange glances from the bustling officers and lawyers migrating up and down the hall.

Dean was sweet-talking the receptionist and she was soaking it up like a sponge, twirling a piece of ginger hair in her fingers. Finally, he flashed his stolen badge at her and her blue eyes widened.

"What can I do for you, sir?" she asked and moved away from her computer monitor to give him her full attention.

"No need to call me sir, sweetheart. I'm off duty, I just need to speak to one of your officers." He flashed her his winning smile. I nudged my head against his thigh, an indication to skip the flirting. He pushed my head away with his hand.

"Well, what are you here for Mr. Washington? I'm sure I can find someone willing to help you," she batted her eyelashes at him. I had enough of this and leaned up to place my head on the counter, standing nearly on the tips of my toes. She squeaked and I flattened my ears against my skull.

"Sorry miss, this is my police dog," he said, glaring at me. I kept my eyes trained on the receptionist. "She goes with me pretty much everywhere, even when I'm off duty." I huffed, my hot breath fanning her face. She scrunched her nose in distaste and turned back to Dean. "We're here about a missing person. I was having a few drinks with my cousin last night, and he's gone missing now."

"Oh, that's horrible," she said, puckering her lips at Dean and lowering her lashes. Before she could open her wide mouth again, I jumped, placing my two forepaws on the counter. She jumped and glared at me. "Bad dog. Shoo," she said, gesturing for me to hop down. I glared at her and she faced Dean once more, rather uneasy. "You're in luck, Mr. Washington. The Deputy who handles most of our missing person's cases is in today. Go straight down the hallway to your right, it's the third door on the left."

Dean thanked her and shot me a quick glare, to which I replied with a dramatic wag of my tail. He rolled his eyes and made his way down the hallway. We stopped at a door with the name 'Deputy Kathleen Hudak' printed on the front in gold letters. Dean and I looked at each other once more before he pushed the door open for me and I sauntered in.

The deputy looked rather shocked to see a legitimate wolf walk into her office, nearly spilling her coffee on herself. She looked visibly confused as Dean introduced himself.

"Uh… what can I do for you, Officer Washington?" Hudak asked.

"I'm working on a missing persons case. You see, my cousin and I were having a few drinks at the bar last night, the one down by the highway." She raised an eyebrow at Dean and he disregarded it, continuing with his mostly true story. "He left a few minutes before me, we were going to drive back together. He disappeared though, haven't seen him since."

Hudak pondered this for a moment before speaking. "How drunk was he?"

Dean chuckled. "Sammy? He could take two shots and pass out." He made a motion with his hand, much like an airplane crash. Kathleen looked unamused.

"I'm sure he's fine Mr. Washington, he'll probably wake up in a bush soon and give you a call. I don't think you need to worry." She moved to return to her computer screen, but I stopped her with a light growl. She frowned at me and then turned to Dean with a scowl on her face. "You know, I've never heard of the state police being allowed to have wolf-dogs as their K-9 companions."

"She is pretty special," he said, giving me an affectionate pat on the head. "Very well trained. I swear, sometimes I wonder if she thinks like a human." He flashed her a reassuring smile.

She paused once again before speaking. "Alright, Gregory," she started, using his ID's first name. "If we're going to find your cousin, we need to do it properly-" she reached for a piece of paper beside the copy machine behind her. "- So I'm going to have to ask you to fill out a missing persons report so we can make a case out of it."

"Officer," Dean interjected, his tone serious. Hudak turned back to face him. "This county seems to have a lot of missing cases. How many of those people actually come back?"

The two stared each other down and my eyes flitted back and forth between them. Finally, Hudak gave in. "What did you say your cousin's name was?" she asked, seating herself in front of her computer and pulling up a registry. Dean beamed at her.

"Sam Winchester."

She typed the name in as I moved to sit beside her. She spared me an uneasy glance before continuing. "So you're aware that his brother, Dean, was suspected of murder and died in St. Louis a few months ago?" At this, I rolled my eyes and tucked my head down, hiding my all too human gaze from the officer. I held my breath, waiting for the moment she pulled up Dean’s record out of curiosity and we were busted.

"Yeah, Dean. Kind of the black sheep of the family. Handsome though," his chuckle soon turned into one of discomfort as the officer and I looked unamused by him. "I think I'm seeing double," he said nervously. Kathleen and I turned to face each other, twin frowns on our faces.

She exhaled slowly, taking in the image of Sam's face on the screen. "I'll head to the County Works Department, see what I can dig up."

"I saw an old set of cameras outside the bar. Maybe one of those saw what grabbed my brother." Deputy Hudak still looked unconvinced. "Mind if I tag along, officer? I promise you won't even know I'm there." She glared suspiciously at Dean and then at me. I wagged my tail at her for good measure.

—

I had never ridden in the back of a sheriff's car before, and I have to say I never want to do it again. Hudak had left me in the car, windows rolled down a bit, while Dean waited for her outside. She came out not long after with a stack of paperwork in her hands. I pricked my ears, straining to listen to their conversation. All I gathered was that they had an idea as to the perpetrator's truck based on a new-looking license plate and the 'whining-growl' of an engine.

It was hot in there, even with the windows open, and dark. I wasn't fond of it. The only good thing about it was that there was room to stretch out in my furred form. Dean's car had little room to stretch out as a human, and he certainly wouldn't allow me to get fur all over his car.

I huffed and laid my head on my paws as they made their way back to the car. As soon as Dean sat down and shut the door behind him I was immediately upright and leaning my chin on the back of his seat. The Deputy's car rumbled as she started it and crept forward like some hulking beast. I dropped my head on the center console and stared out the front window. Dean’s fingertips wound into my fur and scratched my ears. I glared from the corner of my eye.

“She’s a good girl,” Kathleen said with a warm smile.

“Sure is,” Dean answered, giving me a few dramatic pats. I made a sound low in the back of my throat and pulled away from him. He was going to get an earful later.

"That string of traffic cams only goes 50 miles down the road," Kathleen began, as she turned onto the highway. "I lost the truck at the end of the cameras, so they've got to have taken a back road 50 miles or more down the road."

Dean grunted in response. "They've probably got a lot of private roads in this area huh?" Kathleen hummed in response and the car fell silent once more, with Dean trying to strike up the occasionally odd conversation and Kathleen shooting him down.

I eventually closed my eyes, listening to the roar of the car engine and enjoying the feeling of Dean's fingers running through my fur. My eyes snapped open upon hearing a loud beep from the monitor in front of the center console.

She turned the monitor towards her, reading what it had to say before locking her eyes back on the road. I sat up and shifted behind her to look at the screen. I whined softly.

Shit.

"So Gregory," she began. I paced on the seat nervously, thinking about my options. "I ran your badge number. Turns out, it was stolen not too long ago." I whined again and Dean looked helplessly between me and the cop. "Look. It even had a picture of you." She turned the monitor to face Dean, showing her a picture of a much larger black man.

Dean chuckled nervously, looking between her and the monitor as she slowly pulled over. "I lost some weight-" he started. "- And I got that Michael Jackson skin thing done-"

"OK," Kathleen interjected. "I'm going to need you to step out of the car."

Dean protested and they argued back and forth while I paced. I couldn't attack her, what if I accidentally bit her or maimed her? And if I did we'd be in even more trouble. What was I supposed to do, sit on her and hope she suffocated in my fur?

"Kathleen," he began, a tone mixed with danger and pleading. "Look into my eyes and tell me I'm not lying about this." I whined, having missed the majority of their argument in my own frantic state. Her eyes flitted between mine and his. Dean's were stern, full of confidence.

"You've given me no choice, I have to take you in," she said quietly.

"You can take me in after we find Sam. He's my responsibility. I have to at least make sure he's alright." Was he that stupid, willingly turning himself in? So blindly faithful?

The two stared each other down for the longest time, neither backing down. Finally, she dropped her gaze and muttered an 'OK'. "After we find Sam Winchester."

I whined loudly, dropping my head back onto the back of her seat. She chuckled and pointed a finger at me. "And you, I knew you weren't a police dog. You've got to be at least 87% wolf, there is no way they'd allow you to be part of the canine unit." I cast Dean a knowing look.

I had never hated a car ride more in my entire life. The tension in the air was almost palpable, I felt like I was choking on it. The only thing that kept me grounded in that swirling sea of emotions was searching out the scent of cherries amongst the scent of anger. I hoped to God that I would never have to be in a situation like that again, but with the Winchesters it was unlikely.

"Wait, wait, pull over here!" Dean suddenly exclaimed, pointing out the window to his right. I lifted my shaggy head and searched for what he was pointing at, seeing a not well-managed road. Kathleen pulled the car over as Dean had asked and hopped out of the car before it had even stopped. I moved to jump into the front seat and follow him, but Kathleen held an arm out, blocking me. She quietly told me to stay put and I growled in response. There wasn't much I could do to oppose her without giving myself away.

"This is the first turn-off I've seen so far," I heard Dean say through the car door. It was hard to hear, but not impossible. My nose was practically flattened against the glass as I watched the pair make their way down the worn road.

"You stay here, I'll check it out," she told Dean. He looked at her like she was crazy.

"No way," Dean answered.

"Hey!" she hissed, stopping and facing him. "You're a civilian, and a felon, I think. I'm not taking you with me."

Dean glanced down the road, obviously mulling over his options. I knew he wouldn't fight her unless he really had to, but nothing was going to get between him and Sam.

"You're not going without me," he answered, shaking his head at her. Hudak sighed in frustration, looking once more at the car. We locked eyes and I barked at her, scratching at the glass. It was so irritating, knowing I had the capabilities to be helpful, but just couldn't in this situation. Stupid, stupid, stupid, I knew we shouldn't have gone with this plan.

"Alright," Kathleen started again. "You promise you won't get involved? That you'll let me handle it?"

Dean nodded vigorously. "Yeah, I promise." I huffed, my breath steaming the glass. Even I wasn't convinced by that.

"Shake on it."

Oh God, don't do that-

It was too late, the handcuffs were already clasped onto his wrist. Dean swore as she dragged him to the Driver's side door and fastened him to the handle, locking the door behind her. "Kathleen!" he called after her. "I really think you're going to need my help."

"I'll manage," she retorted. I growled and scraped once more at the door as she walked away from the car. Dean peered through the window at me, tipping his head as a sign that I should get out. I felt my bones snap and rearrange as I shifted back in my seat, shaking out my hair and readjusting my own clothes.

I looked out the passenger side window, waiting for her to disappear out of sight before opening the door and quickly locking it behind me so as to stop its incessant beeping.

"She took the keys with her," Dean said hurriedly, struggling with the cuffs.

"I know, I saw." I marched around the car and towards the worn path.

"Where are you going!?" Dean called after me, panic in his voice.

"To find Sam!" I called back. "Someone has to make sure they don't get themselves killed, and you'll figure out some way to get out."

"What if she comes back and sees you're not in the car?"

"Stall!" I said as I ran forward and jumped into my furred form, running down the beaten path. I ran after her, by now she must be far ahead of me. I had to catch up, or else she would have no backup.

I skidded to a halt as a dirty old wooden house came into view, not unlike the one where I had met Marcus and Caeden. This house screamed 'hillbilly' like no other I had seen.

On the front porch stood Deputy Hudak, talking to a ragged-looking little girl, whose hair was matted and dirty. I could practically smell the scent of filth on her from here. She was very clearly human. I ducked behind a clump of trees and surveyed the yard, seeing multiple odd buildings, like makeshift barns. One stood out to me as the dim sunlight, hooded by clouds, reflected off heavy steel doors. It clicked that that must be where they were holding Sam.

I moved to take a step forward towards Sam's location, only to hear a loud crash from the front porch. Shocked, I realized another human had attacked Deputy Hudak, a heavy shovel in his hands and scowl on his inbred face.

He snarled something at the little girl and she went off around the house. Not even moments later, two more, who looked like brothers, walked around the house and headed down the road back towards Hudak's car, her keys in hand.

My mind was reeling at this point. I knew I had three options – save Hudak, find Sam, or return to Dean and help him before the hillbillies got there. None of the options were good ones, as doing one would only compromise the others.

I was thoroughly screwed.

I didn't have time to panic, but I couldn't help but watch in horror as the oldest hillbilly took Deputy Hudak, throwing her over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes and carrying her to the barn where I presumed they were holding Sam. They couldn't kill her yet, I knew that – if a cop was able to find them, then they would have to ask her if there were more on the way.

I snapped my head to the left, down the road where the two brothers were sauntering towards Hudak's car, laughing as they went. If they found Dean there, they'd surely kill him, or worse, and he was in no position to find them.

Before I had realized it I had made up my mind and was racing through the marshy woods towards the Deputy's car. Kathleen would be alright for now – if my hunch was right, she would have Sam. But Dean needed help now.

I didn't even bother with trying to be quiet. I thundered through the woods, breaking twigs and crunching leaves under my heavy, padded feet. My ears were flattened against my skull and I stretched myself to my full length, each stride covering an incredible amount of distance. The burning in my muscles was one I had come to enjoy, but I didn't have time to revel in it now.

In no time at all the car was coming into view. I had passed the brothers, but that still only gave me a limited window of time. As soon as my paws hit the gravel pavement surrounding the car I leapt into the air. Using the hood of the car as a springboard I lept once more and shifted midair, landing on my two feet and skidding, nearly falling.

Dean looked utterly shocked to see me. He was splayed out against the side of the car, reaching for the little antennae on the end. My still golden eyes settled on it and I raced towards it, unscrewing it hastily and handing it to Dean.

"We need to get out of here," I told him harshly. "Now," I snarled as he still stood dumbfounded. He jumped into action, eyes still wide with shock. While he worked to discard any trace of us being there, removing my own paw prints and the imprint of Dean and Hudak's shoes in the mud.

Finally, the handcuffs dropped to the ground and I quickly picked them up. Before Dean could utter a single word I took his wrist in my hand and dragged him behind me into the woods. We ran, Dean confused but willing to comply, our feet softly hitting the ground, us being careful not to make too much noise. It was only when Dean heard the guffawing and laughter of the brothers that he realized.

He opened his mouth to say something, turning to me with wide eyes. His expression turned from one of worry to one of shock when I pressed a finger to my lips.

We didn't say a word as we traveled silently through the woods. It wasn't until the main house was in sight that I took off at a dead sprint, Dean hot on my heels. I skidded to a halt in front of the barn doors and Dean nearly barreled into me. I helped him right himself, our faces close together.

"They're in here," I whispered, tapping the metal. He gulped, searching my still golden eyes. I realized they hadn't returned to their normal color, due to the stress of the situation. I was struggling to keep my fur from bursting out.

I was terrified of what we would find behind that door. I was terrified of the people that had taken Sam and Kathleen. I was terrified because never in my life had I experienced something like this. Before meeting the Winchesters I had been in only a few fights, none of them major like Chikaltio's. I was not prepared for this new lifestyle of having to fight to survive in a world that now knew of my existence. I was not prepared to have people rely on me, to call me their leader or their friend.

I was so scared that I was going to lose two people that I had begun to call my friends, my family, and that there was nothing I could do about that. That's why my eyes stayed that molten gold color, and I think Dean understood that.

Before I knew what was happening Dean was pushing the heavy metal door open, revealing a dark, open room. It smelled of sweat and dirt, making my nose crinkle in disgust. Light filtered in and illuminated the large room, and in the dim lighting I could see two large, metal cages and figures concealed within them.

"Sam?" Dean whispered and stalked into the barn with me to his back. I turned away from the cages, watching the entrance to make sure no one was going to sneak up on us.

"Dean? Is that you?" I heard Sam's voice from behind me. I struggled to pinpoint his scent, thoroughly unable to. It was as if the sound was detached from his body like he wasn't really there. I couldn't sense him, feel him in the room and that alone made my hackles rise. The scent of blood and death and grime was far too overwhelming.

After many hushed whispers, Dean had successfully deduced the workings of the cages. "These are going to be a bitch," he muttered to no one in particular. Sam chuckles, a sound that brought a smile to my lips after the stress of the last twenty-four hours.

"So, what was it, Sammy? What managed to grab you?" Dean asked quietly, fiddling with the mechanism that locked the cages. maybe he could unlock it without the key.

Sam chuckled again, leaning against the bars of the cage. "Dean, they're just people."

Dean stopped his fiddling and turned to his brother with wide eyes. "And you let them get the jump on you?" he scoffed playfully and shook his head before turning to me. "I'm not going to be able to unlock it like this. I have to find the key. Stay here, see if you can get them out," he whispered to me, placing a rough hand on my shoulder. "And if any of those wackos get in here, I don't care what you have to do, keep them away from Sam and Hudak until I get back." His tone was low and filled to the brim with hatred for the monsters that had taken his brother.

I nodded, holding his steely gaze with an equally ferocious one. He nodded back to me and took a step towards the door. Without thinking, I reached out and grabbed his hand as it slid from my shoulder, halting him in his tracks. "Be careful," I whispered. "I don't want to have to come rescue your ass."

He smirked and turned once more towards the door, disappearing into the gloomy, mid-day light.

"You know Sam, maybe we should put your brother in one of these after this. He might get a little less annoying after being cooped up in here," I teased in an attempt to lighten the mood as I reached for the bars of his enclosure.

Sam barked out a laugh. "I doubt it. He'd get whiny real quick." My grin only widened.

"We're going to get you out of here soon," I said, turning my golden gaze onto Kathleen. "Both of you." I strode towards her makeshift prison and met her suspicious glare. "Hi, Kathleen."

She frowned at me. "Who the hell are you? Did you let him out of those cuffs?" I heard Sam snort behind me, struggling to hide his laughter.

"You handcuffed Dean?" Sam asked, his half-hearted smothering of his laughter failing miserably.

"Course I did. I had already guessed that he was a felon after I realized he wasn't who he said he was," she snapped back. "I just want to know who the hell you are and how you found us here. Did you follow us? Are you one of them?"

I scoffed. "Lady, I've been with you the whole time. You pet me multiple times. Do you really not recognize me?" I stood up and spread my arms wide, resisting the strong urge to say 'ta-da'. Her eyes widened as it dawned on her just what I was suggesting.

"No fucking way."

"Yeah, fucking way," I said, a characteristic wolfish grin rising on my features. I sat back on the floor across from her. "I'm really sorry you got caught up in this. This isn't our usual thing, typically it's ghosts and stuff."

Sam started uttering my name with a warning tone. I knew he didn't like it when humans were told about what goes bump in the night. I silenced him with a glare.

"She's going to learn soon enough, Sam. Besides, she’ll arrest us otherwise.” Sam fell silent, an unhappy glare on his face. I sighed and turned back to Kathleen who looked like a deer caught in the headlights. "I'm really sorry you had to find out like this – I'm sorry you had to find out at all. But monsters are real. Those inbred assholes out there aren't like me though. They're just pieces of shit.”

We sat and talked, the three of us, and it felt almost normal. I nearly forgot about the iron bars separating us and just did my best to explain things to Kathleen; the Winchester's lives, my life, and all the dark things that really were hiding under her bed as a little girl. I did regret having to tell her, but it was better this way. I knew I was going to bash some heads sooner or later and I'd rather her be prepared than die from shock. I flinched at every passing sound outside the bar, fear and anxiety rising amongst all three of us. What was taking so long?

A rustling from outside the dim barn caught my attention. "Shit," I whispered, realizing what it was. Footsteps. I lunged to the side, hiding amongst the shadows as the door to the barn flew open and in walked one of the inbred cannibals.

I resisted the urge to snarl, realizing that if he was here, Dean was most likely caught- or worse. The man pulled a set of keys from his pocket and went to the control panel without saying a word, a shotgun slung over his shoulder. He turned the key, pressed a button, and strode over to Sam's cage before the door had even unlatched.

Sam glanced in my direction, worry adorning his features. His intense gaze flitted around his cage before landing on a small object by his foot, which he promptly grabbed. I half stood, prepared to throw myself into the fray. In the blink of an eye the man's gun went off and Sam was launching himself at the hillbilly, a growl of absolute rage leaving his lips. The two tussled on the floor, Sam beating the living daylights out of him. Finally, he snatched the gun from the man and hit him in the side of the head with it.

"Lee!" I heard the older man distantly scream for his son, likely wondering what was taking him so long. He called out for his son a few more times before everything went silent. I stood from my place in the corner and made my way to Sam, avoiding the downed hillbilly.

"Sam, get Kathleen out of there. I'll keep watch." Sam nodded and I shifted, once more shaking out my fur. I heard a gasp from Kathleen as if she only now believed what I had told her.

I licked my lips, my tongue running over the harsh points of my fangs. It wasn't long before Sam got the cage door open, just in time for us to hear the pounding of feet outside. We scattered as silently as possible. I watched as Sam disappeared around a corner and Kathleen climbed a hayloft. I hid behind an old crate, scraping along on my furred belly to stay hidden.

The heavy door flew open and my ears pricked, golden eyes watching the deranged father and son duo sweep through the main room, shotguns held high. I pulled my gums back and silently snarled, following them through the rooms.

I heard shots go off and stalked towards the noise, fangs bared and ears flattened against my skull. I heard a scream, like a war cry and I lunged into the room to find Kathleen wrapped around the only remaining son, squeezing his throat until I thought his eyes would pop out of his skull. I ducked as he waved his gun wildly.

Kathleen went flying, landing roughly on her back. The man screamed, aiming his gun toward her. I snarled and slammed into him, pushing her away from him. The gun went off, blasting a hole in the wall behind Kathleen. She stood and I pushed off the man, using him as a springboard and landing at her feet, skidding in the hay.

"Hey!" I heard Sam shout, catching the man's attention. He swung his shotgun towards Sam, who ducked at the last moment and fired. The bullet made contact with the soft flesh of his father's shoulder.

Sam rushed forward while the man was stunned and delivered a hefty punch. The man dropped his gun and swung back with all his might. Sam fell, knocked over by the force of the punch.

No, no, no, not Sam. I lunged at the man, sinking my teeth into his dirt-covered arm and tearing at the muscle. He screamed, and the sound brought me satisfaction. My fangs sunk into his shoulder and he screamed louder this time. I ground my teeth into his shoulder, crushing the bone in my jaws. I could feel it crumble as blood gushed into my mouth. Anything to keep him off Sam, off my friend.

I could feel him battering my sides, his screams falling on deaf ears and his fists feeling like flies against my skin. I couldn't hear anything but his screams. I tasted something metallic on my tongue.

Oh.

I roared and tore at the man's other shoulder. My top fangs sunk deeply into the dip of his collar bone, hooking underneath it. I ripped and tore until the bone came loose, taking the muscle with it. My claws curled into his soft flesh, my forepaws digging into the soft tissues of his upper arms. I felt blood gush between my toes. As soon as I felt it, I tore. I practically devoured his screams.

I vaguely heard someone screaming from behind me somewhere in the other room. A gun went off, but I paid no mind. I thought I heard Sam calling out to someone, but my mind was elsewhere.

I sunk my teeth back into his chest, my teeth coming in contact with his ribs. I pulled, satisfied at the cracking I heard. My muzzle was drenched in blood, but I didn't care. I just wanted him gone.

I wasn't sure when I tore out his lungs, but I know I did. They lay in a bloody heap beside me, along with a string of his organs that I had rooted through. He wouldn't be alive much longer. Something told me I had to make the most of it.

It was then that my eyes settled on his heart, faintly beating, but still doing its best to keep him alive. My world tilted and suddenly I felt like I was falling.

I heard screams, screams I remembered well.

Why are you afraid? I didn't mean to…

What did I do wrong? Are you crying?

Why are you bleeding?

I breathed heavily, my eyes befalling his heart once more. I swallowed, trying to hold back the wave of saliva and the pangs of hunger that consumed me. I bared my fangs, my nose practically pressed to his weakly beating organ at this point.

My ears were ringing. I couldn't hear. I could barely see. But I could taste. I could smell.

Don't do it.

My ears pricked at the whisper. I snarled and bared my fangs once more, huffing, my own heart squeezing, and my sides convulsing in hunger.

I wanted to vomit. What was I doing? I shook my head, trying to shake away the feelings of red, the wrath and fear I felt. I was warring with myself, mixing two worlds together.

What are you doing?

I don't know. Am I hurting you?

No.

Are you sure? What about now?

That hurts... What are you doing? Stop! STOP IT HURTS!

STOP.

STOP.

STOP.

"Stop!" I heard a familiar scream from beside me. I snarled, my teeth fixed around the man's no longer beating heart. I turned my fiery gaze to my verbal assailant, only to lock my molten eyes on a pair of candy apple green ones.

Dean held my gaze, his own filled with fear. A look I had hoped I would never have directed towards me again. My eyes widened at the sudden realization of what I had done.

The red faded. I removed my teeth from that man's heart with a whine, blood slipping down my jaws. I stumbled backward, tripping over my own feet and drunk with blood lust. Dean reached towards me, and I snarled at his hand, the red returning at the edges of my vision.

Don't touch me. I don't want to hurt you too. I tried to scream, but it only came out as a piercing howl. My panicked eyes fell on what I had done. What had I done?

My fur rippled and my bones snapped, changing shape without my consent. My whine really did turn into a scream, a bloodcurdling scream full of anguish and fear. I didn't have the control over my forms that I once had. My clothes ripped as they appeared in patches across my skin, emerging from beneath my skin as my fur receded.

I sobbed, choking on blood and wrapping my own blood-stained arms around me. I felt numb. Afraid. I spat onto the straw-covered floor.

Suddenly, a pair of warm arms were wrapped around me, a jacket being draped around my shoulders. Once more, I couldn't see. My tears betrayed me, blurring everything around me.. I couldn't see. I couldn't hear.

But I could smell. Blood. Death. Fear.

Cherries. 

[unreadpoppy]

Plus One - chapter 1

Read on AO3

Raphael x Fem!Tav; Modern AU

Summary: Raphael and Tav are lawyers with a messy history. When both need the others help, they'll have to overcome their past.

Or, in which Raphael and Tav are messy exes.

A/N: I've been watching too many crime and law shows with my dad so this has been stuck in my head for some time. That said, I know nothing of the law world, I did some research but still, don't come for me if stuff is innacurate.

The sound of heels clacking on the floor alerted everyone that Tav had arrived. 

People greeted her with ‘good mornings’ and ‘how are you doings’, which were replied with a cold glare. Tav didn’t like small talk nor wasting time on pleasantries. She made her way to her desk, without speaking to anyone.

Tav was one of the senior associates at the Advocate Diabolis, a law firm which specializes in infernal contracts, representing the mortals who were tricked into selling their souls. A few years ago, they had gained more recognition after Tav represented Wyll Ravengard, ending his contract with the she-devil Mizora. 

As of now, she was trying to help the vampire spawn Astarion free himself from his old master, Cazador. They had made a breakthrough after translating the scars on his back, discovering it was an infernal contract. The problem was that she struggled to find a way to work with it. Without the full picture, Tav couldn’t think of a way to save Astarion. 

She sighed, removing her reading glasses and rubbing her forehead. Just then, Shadowheart, her secretary, passed by.

“Any luck with the Astarion case?” She asked, crossing her arms. Shadowheart was one of the few people who Tav spoke with, considering her akin to a friend. 

Tav shook her head. “I have researched everywhere, he even used some of his old contacts to try and help, but we still haven’t found the full contract.” Tav put her glasses on again. “I don’t know what to do.”

“You know…” Shadowheart took in a breath. “You could always try and talk to -”

“Absolutely not.” Tav cut her off before she could say the name out loud. “You know how things are between the two of us.”

“Well, not really, since you never told me everything but -” She paused momentarily, raising a brow “he might be the only one to give you some insight.” Saying that, Shadowheart left. 

Tav sighed and bit her lip. She hated when others were right, but the half elf did have a point. If there was one person who would know more than her about this sort of dealings, it would be the devil himself - Raphael. 

He was the senior partner at the House of Hope, a law firm that usually represented fiends. Raphael was older than Tav, but their paths had crossed a long time ago, when Tav was fresh out of college. They had gotten close, even becoming lovers. 

It all ended seven years ago, when the two of them went head to head in court in the Ravengard case - Tav representing Wyll and Raphael representing Mizora. Losing the case had been a great injury to Raphael’s ego and pride.

The fight they had that night was devastating and they had not spoken since. 

But Astarion was a close friend, and if talking with Raphael was the only way for her to figure things out, she would do so. 

‘It’s only for business.’ She thought to herself as she picked her phone and typed his number. Even after all that time, Tav still remembered it. 

After three rings, he picked up. 

…

It was a quiet day in the House of Hope. 

Raphael had no meetings until much later, everyone was working diligently and no one had come to bother him. He opened a bottle of red wine and served himself one glass, while looking out the windows of his office. 

Suddenly, there was a knock on his door, followed by a voice. “Sir, your father is here.” Korrilla, his assistant, said. 

Raphael downed the rest of his glass, and hid the wine. Mephistopheles was not one to make surprise appearances so whatever this was, it had to be important. He walked to the door, opening it. He flashed one of charming smiles. 

“My dear father, come in.” Raphael motioned to the inside of the room. Mephisto did not address him, walking in and taking a seat. 

The cambion didn’t sit, choosing to stay up while picking up a bottle of wyvern whiskey, pouring one glass for himself. He offered his father but was declined. 

“I don’t intend on staying here for long.” Mephistopheles said. 

“Then what is it that you require?” 

“Baalphegor and I are getting married and she insisted you attend.”  

Raphael took a large gulp from his drink. “And when is it happening?”

“This weekend. I’ll email you the details.” Mephistopheles stood up. “You’ll bring that girl of yours, won’t you?” 

Raphael furrowed his brows. “Whom?” 

“The little mortal one, I don’t remember her name but you introduced us a long time ago.” He cleared his throat. “Because this is a last minute invitation, we already reserved a seat for your plus one.” 

“Father, I-”

“Everyone else has confirmed their attendance. Do not make us look bad by leaving a sit empty.” With that said, Mephistopheles left in a puff of smoke. 

Raphael began thinking about who his father was speaking of until he remembered. There had only been one person whom the cambion introduced to the archdevil. The one person whom he almost took the next step with. 

Tav.

On cue, his phone rang, the name ‘Little Mouse’ flashing before his eyes. After three rings, he picked it up. 

…

“What do you want?” Raphael demanded. 

“Hello to you too, Raphael.” Tav said sarcastically. “Are you free tonight?”

“Why do you ask?” He asked in a dry tone. 

She sighed, swallowing her pride. “I’m having a hard time with a case and I believe you’re the only one that can help.”

“Oh? You want my help? I thought you were a grown woman who didn’t need me to help her. Wasn’t that what you said last time we spoke?” 

Tav rolled her eyes. Of course he would bring that up. “Can you put that behind us for one minute? It’s been seven years.” She couldn’t help but add “And I thought you were supposed to be the wise and mature one.” 

Two could play the game of quoting their past fight. 

She heard him sigh but he didn’t say anything. Tav spoke up. “Listen, it will just be a business meeting, nothing more nothing less and then we won’t have to see each other again.” 

“Fine. But, I will need something from you in return.” 

“Obviously.” Raphael never gave anything freely. “At what time are you free?”

“7 pm. Meet me in the Devil’s Den.” And with that, he finished the call. 

Tav sighed, putting her phone down. She looked at the clock on the wall. There were still five hours until they had to meet. 

‘It’s gonna be fine, Tav.’ She thought. ‘You do what he wants and then you won’t have to think of him ever again.’ 

[zaraomarrogers]

Always and Forever - 10

Pairing: Steve Rogers x fem reader

Warning: Angst and Fluff, Minors do not interact

Word count: 12k

~*~

“oh my... this is delicious.” Y/n said with mouthful of lasagna.

“I told you this place has some great Italian food.” Andy took a bite from his plate.

“Mhmm.. totally.” She was fully focused on her plate. Andy laughed at her.

“What? Have you not seen anyone eating?”

“Never seen a girl enjoying her food like a child.” Andy winked at her. She felt a little uncomfortable but waved it away immediately.

“You know lasagna is the only thing Mal doesn’t like.”

“Hmm, would he be okay with you not being around?” Andy asked.

“Yeah! Steve’s there, he knows how to handle our Mal.” Y/n said nonchalantly.

“Seems like you and Steve get along very well.” Andy took sip from his wine.

“What does that mean, Andy?”

“Nothing! I was just curious to know how things settled down for you two, I mean, after obviously what he did...”

“We don’t have to talk about this right... I mean he’s Malcolm’s father, and he has ever right to be part of Malcolm’s life.” She was trying to keep her calm.

“Didn’t know you’d get all defensive for Malcolm’s father.”  

“Didn’t know you’d go all lawyer on me. Thought it was a friendly dinner.” She snapped taking a big gulp of her red wine. Before Andy could say something, her phone went off. Wanda’s name was flashing on the screen, picking up she wouldn’t know this call would frighten her to her core.

 ~*~

Steve clenched his fists and inhaled deeply. He wanted to rip away Andy's arm that was draped around Y/n's waist, he wanted to beat the shit out this guy who had the audacity to ask Steve about how the accident happened. If it wasn't his son, his little bean in the hospital, he would have done that. Consequences be damned. He could still do it. The moment he took the step in Andy’s direction, Wanda stopped him by holding his elbow.

"Don't even think about it."

With another sharp inhale, he turned around and walked inside the ER where they had taken Malcolm. His heart fluttered inside his chest recalling the amount of blood oozing from his head.

"How did you let this happen? I left him on your watch, Steve." Y/n turned him around pushing him with all her might. If Wanda wasn't there to had a hold on her, she would have hit Steve.

"I left him with you Steve. How could you- " Tears were running freely on her face and she was barely keeping herself compose.

"It's not Steve’s fault, Y/n. Please listen, I was also there, it was no one's fault. It was an accident."

Wanda informed her but she wasn't having any of it. Her baby was in there for MRI and CT scan, and she couldn't be there with him. A sob escaped her lip, "leave me alone, please." She freed herself from Wanda and walked towards the room where they had taken Malcolm for test. Steve had never seen her like that before. She had never lost her cool, she'd never been this agonised as she was now. Y/n, he knew all this time, was a mother now. Malcolm was her everything. Her whole world revolved around their son. He had seen it, witnessed her unconditional and unwavering love, her dedication as a mother, he had seen it all and yet he couldn't help her, soothe her. He helplessly looked at Wanda who was already looking at him.

"She wouldn't listen to any of us. Let's give her a moment. Okay."

He heaved a shaken sigh and sat down on the nearby bench; his head rested on his hands. Wanda came to sit beside him.

“She’s right, I should’ve been watching him.”

“It’s not your fault, Steve. It was an accident. Could’ve happened in her presence too.”

“She’d never trust me again.”

“She would always trust you no matter what.”

Steve looked at Wanda like she had said something utterly strange. He averted his gaze from Wanda to where Y/n was standing outside the room they’d taken Malcolm into for running some tests. Andy came to stand beside Y/n from nowhere and Steve was on his feet again. Wanda tried to stop him, but Steve was fast enough to not only reach but confront Andy.

“What the hell are you doing here?”  

“Excuse me?”

“Leave, Barber.”

“Who are you to tell me?”

“Malcolm’s father! I think they clearly told us that only parents can stay with their child.”

“You can’t de-"

“Steve is right, I think you should go, Andy. Thanks for the dinner, I had a good time.” Y/n sounded tired, she didn’t stay for what Andy had to say, she immediately returned to her previous position from where she could see Malcolm.

Andy frowned looking towards Steve and Wanda. Out of courtesy, Wanda sadly smiled and walked him out the hospital corridor.

Steve went up to silently stand behind Y/n, sadly looking through the window where they were imaging Malcolm’s head injury. He did not try to console Y/n, just scared to see the coldness in her eyes again. It took almost another thirty minutes to complete the imaging, when doctor came outside, she smiled looking at both Y/n and Steve.

“Malcolm will be fine and running in few hours, don’t worry. He’s a very brave kid.”

Y/n heaved a sigh of relief while Steve came to stand beside Y/n.

“What does the imaging say?”

“Well, we ran the test because we wanted to be sure if he has a concussion, or any fracture or internal bleeding, but we haven’t found such thing. It was apparently a minor injury. Other than the three stitches he got right above his left eyebrow, he’s perfectly fine. He’s sleeping at the moment because of the pain meds, once the drugs start to wear off, I’m 100% sure he’ll be good and active. You can see him in a little bit once we move him in the room. We’re putting him under observation for couple hours, he’d get discharge in the morning.”

The doctor smiled and left the worried parents to have a moment for themselves. Y/n pressed her temples with her fingers, looked at Steve.

“He’s fine.” She whispered to Steve with a teary smile.

“He is. Our brave little man.” Steve gently put his hand on her shoulder, giving it a little squeeze.

“I got so scared. Oh god! I’m sorry for earlier, I didn’t- couldn’t think straight.”

“Hey, it’s okay, I understand. You don’t have to apologise.” He smiled and she leaned into him, placing her head on his shoulder. Steve immediately wrapped his arm around her back, rubbing it softly. Steve moved them both and settled on a bench, out of exhaustion Y/n closed her eyes. Steve took in her tired yet beautiful features. The fact that she was coming from a dinner with Andy, was still keeping Steve restless, she was there in his arms wasn’t convincing for him, he could feel the knot forming in the pit of his stomach but he was unable to pinpoint it. He softly placed a kiss on her forehead, making her look up to him. Steve felt her gaze a little distant but he chose to ignore it.

Wanda came in and cleared her throat, gaining both of their attention. Y/n sprang up from Steve’s warm embrace and hugged Wanda. The cold and empty feeling seeped through Steve at losing her touch. He was trying so hard to ignore the gloominess that was just making its roots in his heart.

Wanda was slowly filling in Y/n about the accident, Malcolm was just being actively himself and tripped over the staircase resulted in deep cut just above his eyebrow and few bruises. But as long as he was fine, Y/n was fine.

They had to wait few more hours before Malcolm started waking up, immediately saw his parents. He smiled cutely and raised his hand towards Steve who took his hand in his'.  

“Hey there bubba.” Steve smiled. “How are you doing, buddy?”

“I sowwy daddy, I no listen to you.”

“Heyyyy, it’s okay bubba. No need to say sorry.”

Malcolm gave a smile to Y/n. She immediately kissed his forehead and both cheeks.

“Mal-pal, how are you?”

“I good, mama. No pain. When go home?” Y/n chuckled.

“When doctor would say, we’ll go home, cupcake.” She placed another kiss on his cheek.

Steve went to see doctor while Y/n and Wanda stayed with Malcolm. He was back to being himself again, asking so many questions and chatting along. Once doctor gave them a discharge, they took Malcolm back home.

Two weeks passed by in a blink of an eye, Malcolm’s injury was surely gotten better within the first week, but not before he healed up fully, poor little bean got caught with flu and cold. he had his moments during that, when he only wanted Y/n with himself. He was clingy and moody for the couple of days, acting up especially during meal time. But Steve constantly being there made easier for Y/n to tackle the tantrums of their little boy easily. Malcolm either wanted his mama or his daddy. Giving him meds on time was the herculean task for both Y/n and Steve, Alice and Dan were there to help them as well.

Steve and Y/n, both functioned together as Malcolm’s parents but Steve couldn’t help but noticed that Y/n had gotten distant from him. He tried to convince himself that perhaps she was worn out but even after Malcolm was recovered and back in day care centre, Y/n's behaviour had gotten more and more cold towards him. He tried to confront her if he had done anything wrong, but she wouldn’t even talk to him. They were both back to work and it had become more tiring and demanding since Pepper was hell bent on launching the brand in NYC after her reconciliation with Tony. It was a breakthrough opportunity to show case their brand in front of world's famous designers and also for Wanda to share the space with renowned names of the fashion industry.  

Work pressure wasn’t new or unbearable for Steve, but Y/n's behaviour was worrisome for him and Wanda as well. She was either actively and attentively busy in work or she was just quiet and far off from everything around her. Steve and Wanda could see right through her that she had gotten into her head, Wanda tried to talk to her, but she not so very convincingly told her that she was tired and needed rest. When Steve cornered her, she snapped at him and asked him to mind his own damn business.

“I don’t know what is wrong with her. She won’t talk to me like she used to. She doesn’t even speak with Mal the same way.”

Wanda told Steve after one of the many meetings they’d had. She was concerned was an understatement.

“The last time she was like this was when she came from New York, four years ago. She’d been like that ‘til the day she found out she was pregnant. I’m unable to understand what’s going on in her head.”

“New York! She doesn’t want to go to New York, that’s what gotten her on edge. I can’t say that for sure but that’s the only thing I can think of.”

“Oh my god! Why couldn’t I think of that before.” Wanda sadly looked at Steve. “As much as I want to blame you for this Steve, shit, I don’t- can’t even know for sure.”

“Thanks for giving me benefit of doubt, Wanda.” Steve retorted gaining a scoff from Wanda.

“That still won’t make sense why she’s like this around Mal... I mean this is getting me worried.”  

“I think I’m just gonna confront her about that, she’d probably yell at me but at least I’d be able to help her.” Steve suggestively said looking over at Wanda who only nodded in response.

 ~*~

 "Stop! Please stop!" She took a step backwards.

"You can't keep doing this, okay. You can't keep saying that you love me, like four years never happened, Steve."

"Y/n, I-I can..."

"Shut up Steve! For the love of God, just shut up." She wiped a single tear from her face.

"I let you in in Malcolm’s life because I don't want him to grow up without knowing his father, doesn't mean things can go back to normal between us, Steve. There's no us, don't you get it. Whatever we had, was over four fucking years ago. You and I are only Mal's parents, that’s it. Nothing else."

 In two long strides he crossed the room and grab her arms, his hold strong enough to not let her move and gentle enough to not hurt her.

"There's nothing that can change the fact that I LOVE YOU." He emphasised on each word. "I never stopped loving you in past four years. If you'd listen to me, just once, I beg you just once, I can explain everything, Y/n/n. Please." They were so close to each other. Steve can smell her shower gel faintly on her skin.

"I don't want to listen, Steve. What's done is done, let's not do this again."

"Please, Y/n." He almost begged.

"Past few weeks were my mistake. I shouldn't have given you impression that things could be normal, and I'm sorry for that....."

"Y/n, please don't do this. Don’t give up on us."

"Steve, there's no fucking us." She almost yelled in irritation.

"You're more than welcome to stay in Malcolm’s life but I don’t want you in my life. I don’t!!"

"Please don't say that, Y/n/n." Steve pleaded. He even let the tears fall freely on his face but Y/n was gone the second he loosened his hold on her.

 What just happened.

 Steve was unable to comprehend anything after what had just happened. He knew he had fucked up so bad but he couldn’t remember anything that could possibly be the reason why Y/n had behaved or said something like that. He watched her climbing up the stairs two at a time and heard the door of her bedroom closed a little too loudly. He looked around himself, Wanda was in the corner of the living room, Dan and Alice came out of their room upon hearing Y/n’s voice. He helplessly looked at Dan who was like a father figure to him, his dad's best friend, he knew they couldn’t do anything.

“Steve, I’m sorry for what happened, just give her some time, she’ll come around?” Alice broke the deafening silence in the room and gently rub Steve’s arm.

It started out as a normal Saturday; Malcolm had gotten so much better and asked Steve to spent the whole day with him and that was exactly what they did. Steve and Malcolm went for lunch, they fed the ducks in the park and came back home, built legos, took a nap. Steve, with the help of Alice made some snacks for Malcolm, they had dinner together and he tucked him into bed with reading him his favourite book. Y/n was off and ignored as she had been for past couple of weeks, when Steve asked her after putting Malcolm to bed, she snapped at him but when Steve pressed her to know why she was acting like this, she yelled at him. She didn’t answer his question instead left him with so many questions. Her outburst confirmed his fear that she was hurting deep down but couldn’t word her pain. He wanted to comfort her so badly but she wasn’t letting him.

“It’s okay, I guess I should go.” He sadly looked at Alice.

“Would you please be with her tonight? Please?” He almost requested to Wanda who just nodded. Even she was feeling bad for Steve.  Taking his coat from the closet, Steve stepped out in the cold, a chilly breeze hit his face and he sucked in a breath. He wanted to go and see her, ask her what would make her forgive him but all he did was step forward towards his car. How would he live knowing that only person he had loved the most had wanted nothing to do with him.

“Ma....” he dialled Sarah’s number while still in the car. “I’m losing Y/n and I don’t even know what to do?”

“What happened, son!” Sarah could see her son on the brink of break down.

“Seems like I keep failing everyone I love, Ma. ”

“Honey, Don’t say that.” Sarah was more than concerned now.

He looked her in the camera and just shrugged, it was hard for him to hold back his tears. He hid his face in his palm and starting sobbing quietly. After few moments, he began telling her everything that went down between him and Y/n and how utterly incapable he was feeling in that moment.

“Sweetheart, I think she needs you to ensure that you won’t leave this time.”

Steve looked at her little confused.

“What I meant to say, if you stick around, be there for her and Malcolm, it’d give her assurance that you’re not going anywhere. And this affirmation will change so many things for both of you, Stevie.” Sarah smiled sadly.

“I never thought that she’d doubt my love for her. I’d inflicted this upon us, Ma.” He sighed, rubbing his eyes.

“Just be there, even when things get difficult. She needs you Stevie, more than she ever does. She doesn’t even know that.”

Sarah couldn’t tell him that Y/n had forgiven him, she didn’t tell her but when Sarah visited them, she could see it in Y/n's eyes how much she’d appreciate Steve’s presence in Malcolm’s life. It was a very strong instinct of her that Y/n might have forgiven her son. She couldn’t deny what she could see.

 ~*~

 Wanda gently knocked at Y/n's bedroom door. “Y/n/n? It’s me. Can I come in please?”

She heard the shuffling sound and then the click of the lock. She pushed open the door only to see Y/n standing in front of her with her eyes red and puffy and her face tear stricken.

“Hey....” Wanda hugged her tightly and let her sob silently.

“It’s okay, Y/n. Everything’s going to be okay.”

“I thought so too, Wan, but see...” she shrugged, trying not cry more.

“If you want to open up, I’m here, you can talk to me whatever is bothering you.”

“Is-is he gone?” Y/n asked in a low voice.

“Yes. He is.... he is just as concerned as I am, Y/n/n. You’ve been acting off since Malcolm’s accident and I was worried, I talked to him and he noticed that too....”

“So, you two are buddies now, discussing your concerns for me.” Y/n spat.

“No, God no, Y/n, shit, it’s not what I meant.”

“Whatever Wanda. What do you want from me now?”

Wanda looked at her despondent.

“I just want you to know that I’m here for you, whenever you’re ready to talk.”

“What am I even supposed to say Wanda? What do you expect me to say, that how much it hurts to know that you all knew about him being engaged with Peggy and none of you ever thought of telling me, warn me?! Giving me a heads up... for not letting him in again....”

“I wanted to tell you the moment but.... it was his story to tell.”

“Yeah, Alice told me that too, and I understand, I know it wasn’t any of your fault but mine.”

“No, its not your fault either...”

“Yes, it is Wan. He was only supposed to be there for Mal, but see what I did, I let him in my life too. I let myself get used to of him being around....” She was trembling, tears free falling on her face. “I forgave him, Wan. Just like that.... like I was never mad at him.”

Wanda came to sit beside her on the couch, holding both her hands in hers, “Y/n/n.... I wish... I wish I’d make all of this easier for you.”

They sat there in silence, Y/n sighed after few minutes rubbing her temples. “You know he’d been wanting to talk to me for a while, but I didn’t let him.... because I was so afraid, so afraid that he’d tell me about his relationship with Peggy and I won’t like it.” She looked at Wanda and bit her lip.

“I overheard Alice and Dad talk about Steve’s engagement a month or so ago.” Wanda saw her with wide eyes.

“You’ve been keeping it for a month? Jesus, Y/n. Why didn’t you say something?”

“Dad and Alice told me everything Steve told them; I didn’t know what to think or feel at that moment, so I just did what my heart wanted me to.”

“You let him in in your life, you let your heart lead its way.” Wanda smiled sadly.

“Yes. And see, here I am, pissed and exhausted at myself. I let myself forget everything as long as he was there with me and Mal. I’ve loved him all my life, Wanda, it was so easy for me to fall in a pattern where we were acting like a family.”

“You’re a family. You can’t take that away from Mal now.”

“I messed up Wan. I can’t do anything without getting myself and Malcolm hurt. I allowed Steve in our lives. But what was I supposed to do. It was like a magnetic push for me, I just want to be with him. My heart hurts of all the things I told him tonight and it makes me angry at myself more.”

“Y/n, you need to talk to him. You can’t internalise everything. As much as I used to hate him being here, but he showed nothing but pure love for you and Malcolm.”

“I know... I know... but it’s just... deep down I’m still mad at him, I want to yell at him and the moment he’s in front of my eyes, I forget that I was ever mad or angry. I don’t know what to do anymore.”

“Take a break...”

“What?”

“Hear me out, you can still do your part of work online if it gets too important. Otherwise, just take a week off and visit Grandma. You need a break and Mal will have a vacation. I’ll handle the stuff at work, Pepper will understand. As long as New York is concerned, we still have ten days. You can join in in New York....”

“New York....” Y/n sighed deeply.

“Hey... you don’t want to come to New York?”

Y/n looked at her, she couldn’t say that she didn’t have much of nice memories of New York and there was this anxiety about the city that had been adding to her exhaustion.

“It’s your big debut on international level, I can’t miss it.” she said not so very convincingly. Wanda smiled, her full bright smile.

“You and Steve have this weird connection. Sometimes you two make me believe in fairytales.”

Y/n gave her an incredulous look.

“Okay okay, the other day he told me that you’re upset because you don’t want to be in New York. And you proved him right just now.” She smiled.

“I didn’t say that. I won’t miss it for my own selfish reasons.”

“Hey, it’s okay to be selfish sometimes. There’s nothing bad in it. I won’t force you, y/n/n. Your happiness is important to me. You’re my sister and my best friend, as long as you’re happy, I’m happy.” Wanda hugged y/n.

“Thanks, Wan, I appreciate you so much. Guess, it’s time to leave behind everything that’s been holding me back. I started taking pride that how much I have changed, become a better person for my son, for myself and it’s because of you and Alice and Dad, I started seeing myself differently. I wasn’t in my mom’s or Peggy’s shadow anymore.”

“Except you can’t change how your heart still beat for Steve.”

“My ego is too big to say it out loud.” Y/n shrugged with a small smile.

“Well, I would say, no need to go easy on him.” Wanda winked at her, earning a giggle.

“I think I’m taking up on your offer then.”

“Yessss! I’m calling Grandma first thing in the morning, letting her know that her favourite step-granddaughter is coming to visit her. And then we’ll pack your suitcase.”

“Suitcase? Duffle bag would be fine, Wanda.”

“Nope.”

“Yes.”

“Whatever, just go wash your face and I’ll put a mask on you. We’ll have some girlie things to do, Y/n/n.”

“Oh no, Wan. I’m tired.”

“Good! I’ll rub your feet and massage your shoulders, all you have to do is put aloe Vera and honey mask.”

Y/n giggled, “You used to do that when I was pregnant.”

“Especially when Mal decided to play a soccer game inside.”

“But it was all worth it, Wan. He’s growing up so fast, it scares me sometimes. He’s gonna be four in three months and I feel like I’m not doing enough.”

“What am I ever gonna do with your over thinking.” Wanda pushed her gently into bathroom.

“You’re the bestest hottest mom, stop stressing.”

Once Y/n was in the bathroom, Wanda quickly typed the text message to Steve informing him that Y/n is okay and they have talked. Steve immediately texted back but she chose to ignore the message and put her phone on the bed side table.

“Wan, you don’t have to do this, I’m fine....” Y/n settled on her bed, beside Wanda.

“Oh you just shush it. Let me do the magic, bet you’ll be thanking me in the morning. Talking of which, we have to book your train seat as well, or you want to drive up there?” gathering Y/n's hair in a hair band she placed a cushion from the couch on her lap, and motioned Y/n to put her head on it.

“I’m not gonna drive to Rhode Island, train is fine. Mal’s gonna enjoy the train ride.”

“Okay, I’ll check the first available seat....after this.” She applied the mask on Y/n’s face. Once she was done, she checked her phone, ignoring Steve’s messages, she booked the seats for the next day afternoon.

“All done. You have train at 2:30 in the afternoon. Now, if you want me to email Pepper, I’ll do that as well.”

“That’s fine, I’m gonna email her after this.” Y/n pointed at her face. “Not just Pepper, I will have to email Steve as well.” Y/n said after a pause.

“Of course, he’s one of the bosses.” Wanda rolled her eyes. “Can’t wait to see his face, asshole deserves this.”

Y/n didn’t say anything, Wanda feeling her quietness slightly rub her shoulder.

“I didn’t mean what I said, Y/n/n. It’s just... I know he won’t hurt you on purpose, but I can’t forget how you were hurting, and you still hurt but don’t tell.” She softly wiped the mask with clean cloth. Y/n sat up to face her the moment Wanda cleaned her face.

“Wan....”

“You’re very precious to me Y/n, you are my first best friend, my sister, I never considered you my ‘step’ sister. I never had a real friend; I was bullied a lot when I was a teenager, and you were... like always kind to me. Even when mom and I used to visit New York with Dan, I thought you were gonna hate me because my mom took away your dad from you... but, you.... smiled and hugged me. You don’t know, and no words can’t be enough, how I started seeing myself after meeting with you....”

“Okay... that’s Wanda... you’re making me some kind of.... I don’t know...” Y/n shrugged, “I told you, my parents were broken up long before Alice came into dad’s life, so, and I always wanted to have the relationship just we have now, with my real sister, but guess it was never supposed to happen. I have moved on from all of that, Wan. It still hurt but I see Mal, I see you, Alice and Dad, and I feel blessed to have you guys in my life.” Y/n smiled genuinely and pulled Wanda in a hug.

“Where does Steve stand in your life?” Wanda whispered quietly, “I’m sorry if I’m intruding, you don’t have to answer that? I’m sorry.” When she saw color fading from Y/n’s face, she immediately apologised but surprised to see her smile, a sad one though.

“He’s exactly where he’s always been, Wan. As much as I wanted to hate him, be mad at him, I just couldn’t feel anything but love for him.” Tears started to well up in her eyes.

“Let’s not talk about him, you’re gonna cry and I didn’t want you to cry for that asshole.”

Y/n chuckled through tears. She got up from the bed, Wanda trailing behind to sit on the couch. Y/n opened her laptop and started typing the email to Pepper. After a sitting in silence, Wanda cleared her throat, leaning forward, she sat attentively or rather in tense position. Y/n frowned at her, raising an eyebrow.

“You, okay?”

“Umm Yeah... yes... I wanted to kinda ask you something.”

“Sure.” Y/n eyes were on the screen. There was silence again, Wanda was just shifting uncomfortably in her place.

“Do you want to go to bathroom?”

“God, no, no, what made you say that?”

Y/n chuckled, “I’m a mom, duh.”

Wanda gave her confused look.

“Mal moves a lot, just like you are right now, whenever he has to go pee.”

“Oh my, seriously! No I’m fine.”

“Are you sure?”

“Okay.. I’m done contemplating.”

“Ahuh!”

“Whatwasthetoughestormaybescariestpartforyouwhenyouwere...pregnant?” Wanda said in one go.

“Hey, slow down. I didn’t get a word you said except for pregnant.... oh my god, Wan, are you pregnant?” Y/n closed the laptop and turned her focus completely on Wanda.

“No, no, not yet, no....” Wanda blushed.

“Not yet? But...?” Y/n teased.

Wanda heaved a sigh, a shy smile on her face appeared, “I recently found out that Bucky has a... um... sort of... breeding kink...” Wanda blushed furiously, and Y/n laughed.

“Don’t laugh, jeez, I can’t believe I’m saying this stuff...” Wanda hid her face in her hands.

“Kids are always in the picture for him and I, but from last couple of times he’s been... you know... when we... during...” Wanda said while her face was still in her hands. Y/n laughed out loud, enjoying how flustered Wanda was.

“It’s not like we are trying for a baby right now, I’m still on the pills but I thought it wouldn’t be too bad if we start trying you know. We were also looking for wedding dates in the summer.”

“Wait, you guys have decided the wedding date?”

“No, just a vague idea... I was thinking of summer wedding, Bucky is more like whenever I want to... so I’m indecisive between spring and summer. But if we start trying for a baby now, we’d look for a closer date. I want to have a honeymoon; I’m not compromising on it.”

“I’m sure you have planned out your honeymoon before your wedding.” y/n laughed.

“Yes, of course. I’m taking him to two continents.”

They both laughed together.

“So... I’d like you to give me some tips or may be heads up.?”

“For?”

“For pregnancy of course.”

“My pregnancy was never planned. It was the best accident happened, I would say.” Y/n said after a pause, a sad glint in her eyes as she continued. “As long as Bucky is there in every step of the way, you’ll be fine. Its the most beautiful time in a woman's life, changes everything in the best possible way.” She smiled.

“Oh, but morning sickness is a bitch. You know how I was during my first trimester.”

“Don’t remind me that, you were... something else. Always on edge, ready to kill, ready to cry and throwing up almost everywhere.” They both laughed at the memory.

“I know right! My emotions were all over the place.”

“You were missing him, now I understand that.”

“You have no idea, Wan. I just wanted him to be with me.” Y/n shrugged.

Wanda gently squeezed her hand and changed the topic; it didn’t take long for both of them to relive the beautiful memories they have had made together during the span of four years.

Wanda was excited to share the ideas she had about her wedding; Y/n was more than happy to put her input. Wanda helped Y/n in packing for her and Malcolm. It turned out to be quite a night for both of them, especially Y/n, she finally came to a decision that not addressing the elephant in the room would only cause hurt and misunderstanding for both Steve and her. She still didn’t have a clue what to say to him, there was so much to discuss, so much say and listen for both of them, this small get away was just for buying some time for her, to get her to confront her own fears and insecurities. Her mind had played tricks on her that only cause her to fall deep down in her insecurities. She was looking forward to spending some time alone Malcolm to unwind herself.

 ~*~

 After spending a restless sleepless night, Steve was nurturing a terrible headache with coffee and Advil. He came to work earlier than his usual time, all set to see Y/n and assure her that he’d not leave her, and she could be mad at him all she want. But the email he received from Pepper stating that Y/n was going on a week longer leave made his head spinning. It didn’t take him a minute before he dialled Y/n's number, and it straight went to voice mail. He tried couple a more times, but result remained the same. He was running out of patience, his phone if weren’t made of metal body would’ve lose its original form in his iron grip of hand. He was clenching his phone and was about to throw it on the wall when it started ringing.

“Y/n, what the fu- ...”

“Daddy, I and mama going fow ‘acation.”

Malcolm ignored the irritation on his voice and started excitedly telling him about the trip. He wanted to tell every detail possible of the farm life Alice’s parents own and he had been there in the past and thrilled to go there again.

“Bubba, would you please give phone to mama? Daddy wants to speak with mama.” Steve almost cut Malcolm and felt terribly bad, but he wanted to know the reason behind this sudden trip. He felt like his heart would stop beating any moment.

“Why daddy? Mama packing. We see the sheep and baby sheep make baa baa sound....” Malcolm didn’t have a clue about Steve’s increasing anxiety, so he continued.

“Mal please, I need to talk with mama. Please bubba... please let me speak with mama.” Steve was trying hard not to sound annoyed. Lack of sleep and a cup of coffee was just the add on’s on his current situation.

“Hello?” Y/n said through the phone, her voice sending shivers down his spine.

“Y/n, why are you... what’s the point for this leave... if you’re mad at me... please just let me expl-"

“Steve, stop... would you just stop and listen to me?”

“Okay... sure.”

“I just need a little break from everything... to clear my head. You and Malcolm will be talking the same way.”

“Ohh okay. sure.  I-I see you in a week?”

“Yes, you will, Steve.” With that, she handed the phone to Malcolm and went back to do their last-minute packing. Malcolm began telling Steve all about his previous trips and Steve got himself distracted by his son. He had no idea how he would survive a week without seeing Malcolm and Y/n, only thing that kept him sane was the workload.

Steve took the part of Y/n’s work as well, he started staying late in the office, holding the event in New York around the Christmas time had turned out to be the most expensive and frantic part of the job. He was stunned by how efficiently and diligently Y/n had been working, while he was pulling his hair out at the last-minute hustle. The investors and managers were showing tantrums, just like they usually did, but Steve was having a hard time dealing with them, it was like universe was hell bent on testing his patience.

For Steve, that week had stretched out to be the laborious days he had experienced. He had snapped and yelled at many people that Pepper and Wanda had to intervene.

“I understand you’ve been working a lot Steve, if you need a little bre-"

“For the last time Wanda, I’m fine, I don’t need a break. I just can’t tolerate the lousy behaviour from the people assigned to this show, the whole fucking money depends in this showcase. We’re spending more than we should. I don’t know how’d Y/n work with the amount of incompetent people.”

“Excuse me! There’s not a single fucking person here who is ‘incompetent’” Wanda air quoted. “We are a team, Steve, it means we all are ‘incompetent’ including Y/n. I know you have workload, doesn’t mean you go around insulting our hard working team, this team is the reason we’re able to launch a show in New York. Y/n is the force behind the team, and you know what, she listens to them. Unlike you, of course. You can’t keep barking orders, making changes and expect us to work accordingly. That’s not how it is here.”

They were in the conference room, Pepper and Steve had an argument over the investors. She left with gritted teeth leaving Wanda and Steve. Wanda knew Steve was putting his everything into work, she appreciated his effort, but it was hard to incorporate with Steve’s arrogance and bossy nature, which was nothing but a shock to her. She hadn’t known him to be that way, she had always seen him soft and sweet, when they were young, he was Y/n’s boyfriend and now four years later he was Malcolm’s dad but what she was currently looking at was an arrogant asshole, who wasn’t use to of seeing anyone above him.

“I wish Y/n would see how you really are Steve. A pathetic asshole.”

“Yeah, well, that’s the problem, she’s not here.” Steve snapped at Wanda. “I’m losing my fucking mind.” He whispered loud enough for Wanda to hear.

Wanda scoffed, “that’s what it’s about? Isn’t it? You’re still pissed because Y/n went to have some time for herself?”

“What do you mean still pissed, Wanda? I was never pissed at her to have time for herself. Do not assume things on your own, okay.”

“Your attitude shows the opposite.” Wanda hit the nerve again.

“Oh really? What else is there can you see about me, huh? Can you see that how scared I am? I’m trying to work, distract myself to not to think about the last time we met, she didn’t want me in her life. Fuck, how desperately I want to see her and apologise and ask her why would she say that, Wanda? You have no fucking idea....”

“She knows....” Wanda cut him off. “She knows about you and Peggy.... engagement... she knows about it and she had known for quite a time now.”

“What?” Steve gulped hard. The colour draining his face.

“I wasn’t supposed to tell you this, but... thought to give you a heads up.”

Steve sat down on the chair with a loud thump, his head in hands.

“Fuck fuck fuck.” He muttered under his breath.

“Can you give me the address where she’s staying, please.” Steve’s voice barely audible. “I need to go see her.”

“please Wanda.” He pleaded.

“I can’t, I’m sorry. But I know, you’ll be fine when you see her in few days. Two days to be exact.”

“How can you say that?”

“Because I know that. Trust me. You will lose her if you go there. She needed this time away with Mal. I think you’d respect her.”

“How long does she know?”

“Long enough to allow herself to playhouse with you.”

“Shit!”

Wanda left Steve in his state of turmoil after waiting for him to say something but as if he was in his own world. It would be the two most horrendous days of Steve’s life; he could feel it in his bones. The fear of coming face to face with her again was eating him up. He felt disgusted all over again, not that the feeling was gone anyway.

That night Y/n sent him all the pictures and short video clips of Malcolm having fun at the ranch. Even the pictures weren’t able to lift his mood. He put his phone on the coffee table and started working on his laptop, he couldn’t have thought that receiving those cute pictures in late hours of night could possibly mean something for Y/n. He couldn’t have thought that Y/n could possibly be waiting for him to respond to those pictures.

When Y/n came back from the trip, Malcolm was eager to see Steve, but he didn’t come. Bucky and Wanda had dinner at her parents’ house the same day and Steve was also invited but as if he was avoiding them. He had only video called Malcolm and it was hardly a fifteen-minute call. It wasn’t intentional but Y/n had felt that Steve’s behaviour was because of her. She was angry and confused at the same time. Malcolm was suffering because of both of them.

“You and daddy sad, mama?” Malcolm whispered three days later after coming back when she was putting him to sleep.

“No! Why’d you say that honey?” She was tensed, almost panicked.

“Daddy no talk, no smile. You no talk daddy. He go again, mama?” Malcolm’s head was placed on her chest, she was gently rocking him.

“No, sweetheart. Daddy is not leaving. He’s busy. He’s working all the time because mama and Mal were gone. Now, mama’s back, and I’m going to go to office and share the workload.” She tried to explain. It wasn’t convincing for even her. Malcolm didn’t ask anything, but Y/n had so many things running in her mind. She felt like crying at the innocence of her son and the lie she told him. Malcolm was three and could feel this mental and emotional strain between his parents, stress she caused on her son. It didn’t take much thought when she texted Steve, she couldn’t let her ego harm her son, he was her sunshine.

Can you come tomorrow for breakfast? Mal's missing you so much.

Steve’s reply was prompt, I’m sorry, I can’t. So much work! I’ll video call tomorrow.

Y/n bit her lip, you can be angry at me but don’t let Malcolm get involved in our fight.

Steve looked at the screen, I’m not angry, just busy. I’ll come tomorrow.

Next morning when Steve came over, Malcolm ran into his arms, kissing his face and kept hugging him.

“Miss you daddy, wove you, wove you.”

“I missed you too, bubba. I love you so much.”

Malcolm was literally attached to Steve’s hip, wasn’t ready to come out of his arms. During the few hours Steve stayed there, Y/n and him had bare minimum interaction as if both of them were in their own heads and it wasn’t even intentional. But the other people around them could cut the air with a knife. Y/n had been back to work and barely got a glimpse of Steve, who had drowned himself into work. He was working ahead of his actual schedule, his mood had definitely changed though, now that Y/n was back and working, he had stopped being rude to other people.

As the time for showcase came nearer, Y/n’s anxiety was growing more and more. Sarah had called her and insisted to bring Malcolm along and to stay at her house which she reluctantly agreed to. If she put her ego aside, it was the best opportunity for Malcolm to know more about Steve and make more stronger bond with him. Malcolm was her most important priority and she would never compromise on what’s best for him. She was eager to talk to Steve but everything around them just got busier and crazier, that she thought it’s better to wait for a bit.

She landed in New York day after Steve; Sarah came to pick her and Malcolm up from the airport. Sarah hugged her tightly, whispering how she had missed seeing Y/n and Malcolm. She was excited to have both of them again in her house. She had setup Steve’s room, making little changes here and there but keeping its originality because it wasn’t just Steve’s room, Y/n had shared it with him throughout their college. It was a space filled with their love, joy and laughter, and who knew they’d had made Malcolm right in this same room on his bed.  

Nostalgic, that was how Y/n felt when she entered the room. Sarah kept the whole house same except for some interior changes but most of it was just as it was before. Every picture on the wall had their own tale to tell, every corner of the house had their memory written on it. It wasn’t just Steve’s house for her, it was her safe house. She got to understand the meaning of a mother's ever blooming love for her child. She had witnessed it with Sarah and Steve, and it was what helped her become Malcolm’s mother. She was unknowingly inspired by Sarah Rogers; she had seen her being the epitome of love and empathy for her Steve and for her as well.

Looking around the room, her eyes fell upon the digital framed illustrations she made, placed on the bookcase near his writing desk. These were the couple of illustrations she forgot to take with her when she was leaving. She walked towards the bookcase, that still had all the books they’d bought for each other. Picking up the frame, she looked at the digital copy of her illustration. She didn’t even remember making those, with a feather like touch, she traced the frame and the books and everything that screamed their love. Taking a seat on the edge of his bed, she took the photo album in her hand which was placed on the bed side table. It was her eighteenth birthday when they pose for Bucky’s camera. It was a candid picture but the way he was holding her, his face resting on her shoulder, they were both laughing at something, yet the simplicity of that picture brought so many memories of that night in her mind. Her eyes welled up; she missed those days when they were together. Only thing that mattered for them was to stay together.

“I took all of them from your room when you- you... left.” Steve said in a low voice pointing at her illustrations, he was leaning on the door frame she didn’t know since when.

“Why?”

“That’s everything I had when you-" Steve gulped hard. It wasn’t easy for him as well to see her in his old bedroom. He didn’t allow himself to even have hope that she’d ever want to come to his house let alone his bedroom, at one point it became their bedroom.

Y/n looked at him, she put the frame back on the bedside table and walked towards him.

“Why are you still keeping everything?” she looked at him with a piercing gaze. Steve couldn’t hold her gaze so he just looked down and shrugged.

“Steve?”

“It doesn’t matter Y/n, does it? You said yourself that you don’t want anything from me.”

She gave him a disbelieving look that made him take a step in her direction.

“These aren’t just things; this is the sole reason of my existence Y/n.”

“Yet you believed what I said the other day?” She almost snapped.

“Y/n...”

“No, Steve. You don’t get to fuck up with my mind every time.”

“Y/n would you just lis-"

“No, I won’t. I know we need to talk... more than ever we need to fucking talk right now but... you – you keep saying things like... like you love me... like this...” She was trying her best not to cry, she pointed towards everything in his room, evidence of their love. Taking a deep breath, she came to stand face to face with Steve leaving a little distance between them.

“I – I know, I’m just too afraid to talk about it, Steve.” Steve’s eyes widened. “I’m not sure if I can handle what you have to say about the things that hap- happened------ in all these years.”

“Y/n...” Steve whispered, holding a hand on her arm.

“I know, Steve, I fucking know but- but all of this...” She again looked around his room, a sob escaped her lip. “.... all of this is just.... is just... feel like too much.” And Steve pulled her in for a hug. Enveloping her in his arms, he let her calm herself down. His heartbeat against her head was frantic, yet it soothed her to her core.

“Malcolm asked me if you will leave him again.” She said still wrapped in his arms; Steve’s chin was placed on her head.

“What?” he tried to pull back a little to see her face.

“He’s very sensitive, Steve, he asked me why we’re sad and not smiling and not being normal around each other.” She didn’t look at him, stayed there with her head placed on his chest.

She felt Steve’s muscles tensed and his breath hitched.

“He’s so small, I don’t want him to worry about our issues.” She pulled her face up to look him in the eyes, “Can we not show any of our differences in front of him...”

“....and act normal?” Steve finished for her.

“Yeah!” she softly nodded.

“I’m sorry, my actions made him think like that.” Steve told her with genuine sadness.

“I’m sorry too.” She placed her head again on his chest and closed her eyes. Was it really that easy for them, she thought. The answer was yes. Yes, it really was that easy for them. They’d known each other since forever, it might not be that easy for them right now but in that moment they both sent a silent prayer to the universe to find their way back to each other.

“Whenever you’re ready, we’ll... talk?” They were still standing in each other’s embrace, relishing in the warmth.

“Mhm.. let’s get done with this showcase, it’s very important for Wanda’s career. I don’t want to ruin it because we can’t behave... then we talk like adults. No more hiding and no more holding back. Okay?”

“Sure. Whatever you say.” Steve placed a kiss in her hair and her forehead.  

Steve felt the calmness seeped through his bones with Y/n being in his arms he saw the ray of hope that things could get better, but he was still unable to get rid of the disgusted feeling he had about himself. He had no clue what’d he say to Y/n whenever they’d had a conversation. They both heard the little pitter patter of Malcolm’s feet climbing up the stairs, but they didn’t budge from their place.

“Be careful, honey. One step at a time.” They heard Sarah hollering over Malcolm.

“Mama, I made cupcake with Gwanny.” He ran into the room excitedly but didn’t expect to see both his parents in each other’s arms. He looked up at them with wide eyes and clearly confused.

“Huggy time with no me, mama?” Malcolm innocently pouted, made Y/n giggled lightly. She pulled back from Steve’s hug and crouched down to pick Malcolm up. She sat him on her hip and looked at Malcolm who was still a little confused with seeing his parents this close.

“It’s huggy time for all of us, Mal-pal. Right?” she looked at Steve expectantly who took a moment to get the cue.

“Oh-Oh... C'mon bubba, let’s squeeze you in a hug.” He took him in one arm and wrapped his other arm around Y/n.

Malcolm giggled and laughed, wrapped his arms around Steve’s neck.

“I made cupcake with Gwanny. Mama’s favouwite.”

“Wow! What about daddy’s favourite? What did you make for me, bubba?”

“Umm, dunno. Aw food youw favouwite daddy.”

Steve laughed out loud, making Y/n and Malcolm giggle.

“Mama’s gonna go help granny with dinner, daddy’s gonna show you his childhood room, okay Mal.”

“Okay mama, wuv you.”

“Love you too, Mal-pal.”

Y/n smiled and went down to help Sarah with dinner which was almost ready. Wanda and Bucky were invited to have dinner with them. Y/n had started setting up the table with a small smile still plastered on her face.

“I’m so happy to have you back in this house, Y/n/n.” Sarah said after a little while, she was beyond ecstatic to see her and Malcolm in her house. It was like dream come true moment for Sarah to see them as a family.

“Thanks Sarah.” Y/n smiled. Sarah looked at her lovingly a little too long, she chuckled awkwardly.

“It’s just... I always wanted to have you, Steve and Malcolm together in here. I have missed you, sweetheart.”

“Sarah, I-I...”

“I know, it’s okay.” Sarah gently squeezed Y/n’s arm. “You don’t have to say anything, sweetheart, I understand.”

Y/n nodded and smiled awkwardly, having no idea what to say. Malcolm and Steve’s exult of joy had echoed through the house, indicating father and son duo clearly having fun. Sarah cooed over them while still carefully taking out the latest batch of cupcakes.

The doorbell rang implying the arrival of Bucky and Wanda. Y/n opened the door with a smile. Bucky hugged her tight, whispering how happy he was to see her there. Wanda hugged her next, she was holding a large garment bag.

“What’s this?” Y/n pointed at the bag.

“Surprise surprise.” Wanda laughed handing the bag to Y/n.

“Oh no no, you gotta be kidding me, Wan....” Y/n exclaimed.

“Told ya, I’m gonna dress you all hot and sexy. You can’t see it right now... open it later.” Wanda winked at her, taking a place beside Bucky, who was trying to steal a cupcake.

“Where’s Mal?” Bucky asked with his mouth full.

“With his dad.” Y/n playfully smacked on Bucky’s hand when he went to take another cupcake.

Malcolm came running down the stairs, Steve on his tail hollering over him to be careful. Malcolm jumped into Bucky’s arms with a loud squawk.

“Hey man, wassup.”

Malcolm picked some crumbs from Bucky’s lip and pouted. “You eat my cupcake? Mama, unc’e Buck eat my cup cake, why?” he wiggled down from Bucky’s arms.

“It’s okay, Mal, see, there’s plenty of more.” Y/n took him and sat him on her hip. “It’s dinner time, what did we agree on, remember?”

Malcolm whined and hid his face in her neck. “Mal-pal, no more sweets before dinner. Granny made your favourite pasta and stuffed chicken.”

“No eat pasta, onwy eat cupcake in dinner. Pwease mama.”

“Sweetheart, we can’t eat cupcake for dinner. You can have a cupcake after you eat dinner, okay.” Y/n softly said.

“No mama, why no cuppycake?” I want cuppycake, mama.” Y/n knew Malcolm was getting grouchy because of the new place, he had been anxious of coming to New York. She knew she hadn’t satisfied him even after answering his endless questions related to coming to New York. Malcolm had gotten anxiety of new places; it was that bad but it was still there. It was her task to handle the crankiness of her little boy.

Slowly she started telling him stories, encouraging him to eat food in dinner. She was in the kitchen with Malcolm still clinging to her. Everybody was in the living room, laughing and talking away. Bucky and Wanda knew about his anxiety, so they were giving Y/n and Malcolm some space. Steve joined Y/n in the kitchen shortly, he talked Malcolm out of his little questions and made some promises that had gotten him few glares from Y/n. Finally, Malcolm was ready to have dinner with them but refused to sit on the chair, he remained in Y/n’s lap, she fed him simultaneously while eating her own dinner.

Sarah, Bucky and Wanda watched as Steve and Y/n sat beside each other, Steve’s chair closer to Y/n, their sides touching, and he kept asking her if she wanted anything else. He also refilled her plate and her glass of water. They chose to not say anything but Bucky couldn’t live without teasing Steve so he cleared his throat a little too loudly and not to mention, weirdly to get Steve’s attention and when Steve looked at him, Bucky winked. Steve raised an eyebrow and chose to ignore his best friend but Bucky wasn’t the one to back off easily. He kept pulling Steve’s leg during dinner, making everyone laugh, especially Y/n. She needed to lighten up, it wasn’t easy for her as well to be back in the city and in Steve’s house. The lingering tension between them was still there but as the time passed, it was getting better.

Once Bucky and Wanda left after dinner, Y/n took Malcolm to bed, he wanted to sleep with Steve in his old bedroom. After he fell asleep, Y/n the room silently, Steve wanted to ask her if she would want to take the bed but he stayed quiet, not wanting to cross the line.

~*~

In the spare bedroom where Y/n was staying, she opened the garment bag to see her dress that Wanda had made specially for her. Wanda had yet again outdone herself with Y/n’s dress. It was elegant, expensive and appeared effortless yet was carefully curated.

She quickly shot a ‘thank you’ text to Wanda and put her outfit in the closet. Not bothering about her nightly skin routine, she went straight to bed, she was tired from work and in dire need for sleep.

Steve’s lips drifted up and down her throat, biting and licking, his hands caressing her back, tangling in her hair, pulling her close as he sought out her lips, drawing her into a deep, probing kiss.

He hissed at the feeling of sharp pain in his lower abdomen and heard a distant mewl. He felt like someone had shaken him, it took him a minute or two to realise that it was Malcolm’s low whimper in his neck and he was trying to get him up, basically pulling him out of his very wet dream.

"Bubba, what's wrong?" Steve asked him groggily.

"Where mama? Want mama. Want mama. Bwing mama." Malcolm was full fledge crying in his neck.

"Bubba, mama is in another room, why are you crying? Let me get mama. Wait here, okay." Steve tried to get up but Malcolm grabbed his t-shirt tightly, shook his head vigorously.

"No go, no go, daddy no weave." Steve’s heart clenched seeing his son crying. His mind was still in sleep haze.

"Okay buddy, let me call mama, let's wake her." He grabbed his phone from the bed side table and dialled Y/n's number, while trying to pacify Malcolm at the same time.

She picked up right before he was about to hang up.

"Y/n, would you come to my room, Malcolm wants you." Steve said, she could also hear Malcolm’s whimper in the background. She jumped out of the bed and ran into Steve's room, not bothering to hang up the call, she swung open the door of Steve’s bedroom. In an instant, Malcolm was in her arms, crying.

"Mal... sweetheart... what's wrong? Did you have a nightmare?" She asked rubbing his back.

"No mama, tummy hu't." Malcolm sobbed in her neck; he was still clutching on her tight.

“Did you poop today, Mal?” Y/n whispered in his ear. Malcolm shook his head slowly. “Dunno.”

“Sweetheart, what did mama say, when you don’t go to bathroom, you’ll get tummy-ache.” Y/n rubbed his back, placing kisses in his hair. Steve was standing there alert, in case Y/n would need something.

“Do we need to see a doctor?” Steve asked causing Y/n to chuckle.

“No. Who goes to a doctor for constipation.”

“Is he.. his stomachache is because of that.”

“Yes.” She nodded, “Can you grab me Malcolm’s bag? There’s a heating pad in there.”

She sat Malcolm up in her lap, who was still whimpering, and gave him water to drink from his Buzz lightyear water bottle. She gently placed the heating pad on his tummy and laid him down on his tummy.

“Mal-pal, you’ll be fine in few minutes. You can go back to sleep and if you feel to go the bathroom, please tell me, okay?” Y/n leaned down and kissed him softly. Malcolm grabbed her hand tightly and made a crying face.

“No go, pwease mama, sweep here.” Y/n sat back again in her previous position. She looked at Steve as if, asking if he was okay with her being in his bed.

“You can sleep here; I’ll take your room.” Steve smiled. He came to sit by the edge of the bed, leaning over to kiss Malcolm.

“Daddy, stowy.” Steve and Y/n exchanged a look.

“Sweetheart, daddy and mama has work in the morning. He’ll tell you story tomorrow.” Y/n tried to reason but Malcolm started crying again, he clutched his belly.

“Okay okay, daddy’s gonna tell you a monkey story, bubba, please don’t cry. Are you still hurting.” Malcolm nodded.

Steve started to tell the story but Malcolm was still restless. Sighing, Y/n settled on the bed, where Steve was previously laid, she rearranged the pillows underneath her head and moved Malcolm over her body. She gently put his head on her chest, and half of his body over hers, and gently started patting him for him to fall asleep. Malcolm squirmed a little but got comfortable instantly.

“Daddy stowy.” Malcolm whispered when Steve was just sat there silently watching Y/n trying to make Mal asleep.

“Come daddy...”

Steve came to sit on the other side of the bed, holding Malcolm’s stretched hand and started making up the story. Malcolm was out like a light, following Steve, who fell into comfortable slumber despite lying in awkward position, one hand still in Malcolm’s soft grip.

Y/n woke up next morning to find herself stiff. Malcolm was snuggled into her side, his head rested on her boobs and his lower half on Steve’s torso. She let out a small laugh when her eyes fell over Steve, his head was barely on the pillow and his one leg was dangled off the end of the bed and the other one was tucked underneath Malcolm. They were pretty miserably positioned on the small double bed except for Malcolm. Y/n slowly scratch Steve’s stubble under his chin, earning a loud groan and few curses when he tried to straighten up.

“I’m going to freshen up .... just try to wake him up gently.” Steve yawned, nodding his head. Y/n gently put Malcolm on the mattress and stood up with a groan. Her muscles were sore, and she was in dire need of hot shower. Steve’s eyes raked over her body, dressed in a simple t-shirt and pajamas, she still held the power over his senses just like before.

Rest of the morning was swamped with Y/n taking care of Malcolm’s bowel movement and making sure he won’t consume more sugary delights than he already had in past 24 hours. Steve was wrapping up the last minute checks on the venue, making sure everything was up to the mark, making calls where necessary, it was Y/n’s job to do but Steve offered his help and she gratefully accepted. She was still apprehensive of leaving Malcolm with Sarah, it wasn’t like she didn’t trust Sarah, but it was his anxiety that had been coming in episodes and it’d be hard for Sarah to deal with Malcolm’s crankiness.

She was giving final touch up to her make up when Steve came into the room, he was wearing a three piece designer suit, looking like a GQ model. But it was Y/n who took his breath away, with Wanda’s creation and Y/n’s naturally beautiful features, she was a sight for Steve’s sore eyes. The dress was revealing just perfect amount of her skin, accentuating her curves, the outfit was a perfect fit for her. Steve almost forgot to breathe. His intense gaze was scrutinising all over her body. They were both standing there in awkward silence, Steve sauntered forward in her direction.

“Hey..” Steve whispered, as he came to stand before her.

“Hi.” Y/n let out a soft chuckle. Steve gulped hard.

“You l-look.... beautiful.” He touched her cheek with the back of his hand. “I can’t believe you’re here. It’s – it’s just...” He frowned, closing his eyes, gulped again. Y/n saw the redness in his eyes when he opened ‘em. Steve chuckled awkwardly, “it’s just... I thought I’d never see you again.” His voice broke at the end of sentence.

“Steve...” Y/n whispered.

“I’m sorry Y/n, I’m so sorry.” A tear slipped out of his eye and Y/n didn’t take s second to wipe it away with her thumb. She let her hand stayed on his face for a minute longer. They stared into each other’s eyes, things they wanted to say to each other, all the feelings they had for each other, they let it communicate through their eyes.

Y/n didn’t know why it felt so easier for her to allow herself to succumb into the moment with Steve. Just by being there in that house, something flipped inside of her. Every corner of this house had their shared memory, their love, their laughter, their tears, their achievements. Being there reminded her of her long-forgotten dream of having a house with Steve, her dream of having a happily ever after with Steve. She realised in that moment that no matter what, Steve was and still her home. Her endgame. Her everything.

A desperate need of being closer to Steve made her do what she did next, and it left her stunned. Covering the little distance between them, she crashed her lips on to his in a searing kiss, catching him off guard. It took good few seconds before Steve reciprocated and voila. There was no going back from that, Steve’s hand grabbed her waist and pusher her further into him. She snaked her arms around his neck, gently tugged the hair on the back of his head, earning a low growl from Steve. Their lips worked in sync, Steve’s hands roamed over her waist to hips and towards her ribs and finally cupping her breast through the silk fabric. She let out a moan in his mouth, and he groaned at the softness of her flesh. He could feel that she wasn’t wearing a bra, he clearly wanted more when he pressed her further into him if that was even possible, his growing hardness rubbed in her upper thigh, and she pulled back breathing heavily.

“Steve,” she sighed, her head lolling back when Steve had trailed his lips past her own to her jawline and then her neck, “I told myself I wouldn’t do this. I made a promise to myself that I wouldn’t crumble.... I wouldn’t give in....” Steve stopped and looked at her in horror.

“I’m sorry.” Y/n whispered pulling further away from Steve. “I-I didn’t – I’m so sorry.”

“No, no it’s fine – you don’t have to apologise, I shouldn’t have... it’s not your fault.” Steve frantically said, he ran his finger through his hair. He had pain written all over his face.

“Y/n, do you regret this?” He came forward again and asked her in shocked.

Y/n was as shocked as he was, she didn’t expect that to happen, she initiated this, it was her actions that caused tension between them ten times more. But did she regret it? The answer came prompt.

“No!” She whispered; eyes still locked with Steve’s.

Steve nodded, “I’ll be waiting downstairs...” he left the room without looking back at her and she had the urge to go after him, call him and told him that she couldn’t and would not ever regret giving into him. It was him after all.

Malcolm was sitting by the coffee table on the floor, coloring in his drawing book. Steve was seated on the couch, using his phone. Y/n came to sit on the other end of the couch, getting Malcolm’s attention.

“Mal-pal, mama and daddy are going in a work party. We’ll be back soon, you remember what I told you?” She combed Malcolm’s hair with her fingers.

“Yes mama. You pwetty.” Malcolm kissed her with a smile. Steve was watching the two of them with adoration.

“Be good to Granny, and go to bed after dinner, okay?” she kissed his forehead.

“ ‘kay mama. Come soon.”

She kissed him one more time and looked at Steve who crouched down to kiss on Malcolm’s head.

“We’ll be back soon, bubba. I love you.”

“wuv you, daddy.”

“Have fun, you two.” Sarah said from the kitchen. She winked at Steve when he gave her a look. Little did he know that his Ma had accidentally snuck up on him and Y/n while they were kissing.

 ~*~

 Y/n was expecting an uncomfortable car ride, but Steve smiled at her the moment she got in the passenger seat. He gave her one of his signature smiles that was reserved only for her, and it instantly calmed her nerves.

They spent twenty-minute car ride in comfortable silence, occasionally glancing at each other, passing smiles.

Once they arrived at one of the expensive and biggest fashion centres in New York City, they mingled in with the guests who were already there and the ones who were started to arrive. Tony and Pepper looked like the iconic power couple.

Tony raised an eye brow at Steve when  Y/n wasn’t looking, Steve knew Tony won’t shut up about it so he took a mental note of giving up Y/n heads up for Tony’s garrulous nature.

Wanda hugged Y/n , whispering how drop dead gorgeous she was looking. She looked at her with narrowed eyes and then her eyes widened.

“What?” Y/n asked.

“Did something happen between you and Steve?” she smirked.

“Wanda... no..” Y/n blushed.

“Oh my god, it means yes.”

Before Y/n could deny or say something, Bucky called her over to meet someone. The only reaction Y/n could give was a slg smile.

“I swear I’m digging you in a bit.” Wanda said and went to Bucky.

The whole event was a huge success in all terms. Wanda’s work was recognised by all the major fashion houses. She got the exposure she deserved. Steve and Y/n may not appear as a couple but most of the intricate eyes were on them. His small gestures like keeping his hand on her back while meeting with people, wrapping his hand around her waist, a little too tightly when some guy tried to hit on Y/n. He couldn’t wear off the hearts from his eyes whenever he looked at Y/n and it was a little too obvious. He didn’t make an effort to hide his true feelings for Y/n throughout the event. His words, his touch, his eyes, his smile – all screamed how much he was in love with Y/n.

Y/n excused herself from the after party and walked out in the hallway. The loud music was still playing but a little better. She overwhelmed with all the attention she got tonight. She took her phone out and called Sarah to check in on Malcolm.

“Mamaaa, see gwanny and I makes a pwaydough cake.” He showed her few of the stuff he did with Sarah. Right now he was snuggled comfortably in Sarah’s lap.

“Wow, It looks so good. Mal, have you eaten dinner? Sweetheart, did you listen to Granny?”

“Yes mama, I go Walma’t with gwanny. I get a toy.”

“Uh oh, Sarah, he’s not giving you hard time, is he?”

“Absolutely not, dear. Don’t worry we’re having so much fun.”

“Mama, where daddy?”

“Right here.” Steve came to stand behind Y/n in camera. Y/n didn’t notice him leaning against one of the wall sized glass window.

“Bubba, you’re enjoying?”

“Yes daddy. I get a dino'ur toy.”

Steve was standing so close to her, she could feel his hot breath on her neck and shoulder. A shiver ran down her spine, it didn’t go unnoticed by Steve.

“Bubba, mama and I are gonna be there, you take care and go to sleep okay.”

“No, pway more. Bye daddy.” Malcolm pressed the red button. Steve laughed at his son, still not budging from his spot.

“You cold?” he whispered in Y/n’s ear.

Y/n turned around, “why were you sneaking up on me?”

“I’m not!” Steve smirked.

“Yes, you are.”

“okay, may be.”

Y/n raised an eyebrow and Steve chuckled.

“I’m tired, let’s ditch the rest of the party and go home.” Steve said mischievously.

“No, we’re not.”

“Yes, we are.”

“Steve...”

“What? We have done this before.”

“Yeah, but we’re not in high school anymore.”

“Wish I could turn back the hand of time... when we were together.”

“Steve...”

“I love you Y/n, I love you very much."

He held both her hands in his, leaning forward, he placed his forehead on to hers.

“Steve, we need to talk....”

“I know.” He looked in her eyes, “... do you want to go home and talk... or maybe we can go somewhere quiet...”

“Home. Let’s go home.” She pressed a smile.

“Would you mind if I-" He leaned in slowly. “- if I.” Mirroring his actions, she met his lips half way. It was a soft and sweet and reassuring kiss.

They both jerked apart when heard someone cleared their throat loudly.

“Wow wow, what a show.” Peggy’s voice filled with spite.

Y/n got stunned, she looked at her sister with wide eyes filled with horror and pain.

“So, that’s why you broke off our engagement? Because you want to rekindle your romance with your old flame.”

“What the hell are you doing here Peggy? You’re won’t get the invitation, I made sure of that.” Steve said through gritted teeth.

“And yet, here I am Steve, ruining your perfect little reunion.” She took a step forward in Y/n’s direction, but Steve was quick to stand before Y/n.

“Hey there little sister, seems like you have my fiancé wrapped around your finger again. And you Steve, are you having fun screwing this little whore again.”

“Shut the fuck up Peggy. Get out of here before I call the security.”

Y/n didn’t stay there to listen to what Peggy had to say. She ran towards the door and into the crowd of people who were dancing on the beats of music. She could barely walk in heels but staying there wasn’t even an option right now for her. She rubbed her eyes, wiping the tears away harshly. She took her coat from the front door reception and stepped outside in the cold, she hailed a taxi and got in. Giving address to driver, she finally let out a sob she had been holding back.

[rosylights]

REUNION(S) | PART II ༊*·˚

synopsis: a smol storyline; home-alone Charlotte struggles to find ways to have a pleasant Christmas. content warning: ꒰Rayan x Olivia꒱ heavy romance; no xxx, sister chooses love over sister (aka betrayal) author's note: the entire plot is a first person pov of Charlotte; the characters are non-fictional, i.e., they do not represent a face of movie/anime/series/show, yes it's a heavy romance this time word count: 1.6k

“He broke into my house.”

“He’s an architect.”

“That, is a trait of a thief.”

“He had no choice, you were passed out.”

I groaned, resting my head in my palm before glaring at the apparent couple sitting on the other side of the dining table. I observed Olivia, closely noticing how she defended her lover rather than supporting her sister.

“Are you both dating?” I questioned, clearly unamused when Rayan choked on his cappuccino and Olivia glared at me with a furious blush.

“What?” I shrugged in defence before pointing at them, “You both look like you’re already married for 10 years.”

Olivia jolted up, rushing to my side and pushing me out with her towards my room. I blinked at Rayan, who stared at our disappearing figure while wiping his mouth.

“For god’s sake, Eli. Shut up.” She sighed, shaking me by my shoulders once we entered the room. My face scrunched in confusion, “What did I do?”

“Why do you talk like that when he’s around?” She groaned and I plopped on the bed, rolling my eyes at her ignorance.

“Bro, you talk like you have been dating him for ages when he is around. You both flirt in front of my holy eyes, and when I state the obviously obvious,  I’m the one who is making assumptions? Just kiss already.” I buried my face in the pillow and winced at the smack on my head.

“Come on, Eli. We’re taking it slow. Besides, I won’t make a move before him.” This girl.

“Okay, whatever helps you not blush and make your cheeks maroon.” 

She threw a glare at me, to which I just raised my hands in surrender. She shook her head before wringing her fingers and began in a soft, appealing tone.

“I told you that I called him to check up on you since you were not picking up my calls..”

He came from Dubai to Manhattan just to check on me within 5 hours? Sounds fancy and not so Rayan.

“..and that our flight was delayed, so we could not come on time to you.” 

My eyes rolled at how she was trying to mould things into something justifiable. Her excuses were quite lame, considering she was a lawyer.

I gasped in mock surprise, pointing a hand at her as I whispered. “Let me guess, you both have already been meeting. It would be too obvious that you both are together, so you decided to send him first and come later. Moreover, you have the spare keys to my house. Oh shit! Why did I not think of it earlier? How did he have the keys?”

She blinked. I smiled and flicked her forehead.

“If it’s not evident enough, then let me break it to you. You are dumb when you are in love.”

Before I could receive another smack, my phone rang in my pocket. I slipped it out and looked at the flashing screen. My heart dropped and my smile faltered when I saw the caller id.

“What’s wrong?” Olivia frowned at me, clearly noticing the change in my demeanour. 

“I- It’s him.” I stuttered. After last night, I barely had the guts to talk to him.

She tilted her head before snatching the phone from my hand and answering it.

“Hello. Hi Jiju, it’s Olivia.” – “Yes, she’s here.” –she glared at me as the conversation continued– “Talk to her.” I shook my entire body in bewilderment, but she did not listen.

Olivia kept the phone in front of me as his voice echoed through the speakers.

“Charlotte? Baby, I’m sorry.”

I dropped my head with a low groan. This is the part that I hate the most. It would not be his fault, yet he would apologize. And that would make me feel bad because he never did anything, to begin with.

I hate it so much because despite knowing what he did or not, he said sorry. He would be worrying about me the entire time, thinking it might be his fault.

I hate to see him like this.

And at that moment, it made me miss him more.

“Darla, are you there?”

His voice broke my little head rant and Olivia sighed beside me. “Yes, she is.”

I looked at her and she held my shoulder assuringly. “Talk to him” was what she mouthed before leaving me alone with him, his voice, to be exact, in the room

“You did nothing,” I mumbled and for once doubted if he heard me or not.

A tired sigh came from the other side. 

“Of course, I did something that made you ignore my calls and texts. I’m sorry, baby. I didn’t mean to hang up on you like that.”

I shook my head as if he would see me disagreeing with him. “Seriously, Clyde. You did nothing. I should be the one saying sorry. I overreacted, as usual, I missed you the entire day. It made me upset that you didn’t call or even text me the entire day. Moreover, I was feeling a little low.”

“You were not overreacting, love. I know it’s my fault. I should have texted you, I’m sorry.”

I hushed him, hoping he would stop apologizing. After a small pause, he continued.

“I heard about Rayan from Olivia.” My eyes widened slightly, I had no idea why my heartbeat was fast.

“I’m glad you have people around when I’m not there.” He said it in such a gentle tone that my eyes teared up.

“They’re not you, though.” My bottom lip trembled and I averted my gaze. The lighted screen with his photo was not helping the situation.

He smiled. I felt it. 

“I’m trying, baby.”

“No.” I hesitated. “Work is important, I get it. You don’t have to rush things because of me.”

“But I feel upset being away from you too, Charlotte.” 

We both sighed.

“You don’t have to hurry things because of me, Clyde. Take your time.”

I looked at the clock ticking on the wall. “Baby, your meeting.”

“Yes, Darla. I’ll go in a while. I love you. Take care of yourself, hm?”

After a few moments, the call was declined. I stared at the ceiling.

It was supposed to be our first Christmas together.

There was a knock on the door, my head turned towards it and before I could answer, it flung open.

I rolled my eyes seeing that conceited apple.

“We are going out. Do you wanna tag along?” He leaned over the doorframe and I smiled at him.

“You want me to third-wheel?”

He turned around to leave while commenting. “It is fun seeing you third-wheel.”

I stuck my tongue out at his figure. But I was bored being at home the entire month. It would be a good change.

~

Good change, my ass.

“I feel like I’m single.”

I stood in the middle of the pathway, watching the apparent couple being lovey-dovey.

“You have a husband,” Rayan remarked, pointing a finger at me while wrapping Olivia in his overcoat.

I grinned, turning my head towards a tomato-Olivia. “Will you mind being single again because I’m going to kill him?”

She averted her gaze, breathing heavily as the fog through her mouth hit the crook of Rayan’s neck while he fixed the collar above her back.

“He’s not wrong though. You torture us all whenever Orhan is around.” She mumbled, clearly fazed by their proximity. Wow, I feel utterly single.

They will never stop with this, would they?

“Stop guys,” I wailed, walking ahead of them while ticking my boot over the snow-covered walk lane as my gaze roamed around the decorated street and well-lit colourful shops, “If you talk about him, I might miss him more.”

Turning around and walking backwards, I see them smiling at me. A pout formed on my lips. “What?”

Olivia tilted her head, shrugging with a beam. “It’s good to see you both still together.”

“Yes,” Rayan chimed in, “When are you making me an uncle?”

I rolled my eyes, staring at him from head to toe before swirling around. “You already are one.”

Olivia gasped, running over to me and grabbing my arm, “Are you pregnant?”

What?

In my silence, which was just processing time, she jumped and ran to Rayan. “She’s pregnant! I knew it. The way you’ve been acting, I knew it. Oh my god.”

The guy just stared at me, bursting into laughter when he read my face. 

“Jesus,” he muttered, and as Olivia bent to talk to someone in my tummy, he came over and held her by her shoulder, pulling her back. “She’s not pregnant, Bee. It was just an attempt to call me ‘uncle’.”

Her face scrunched in disappointment, “Are you serious, Eli?”

“Well, now I know how you’ll react to the news.” She smacked my head, making me wince.

“By the way, why did you come alone?” I questioned as we walked down the lane, casually contemplating entering a store but then not.

“Vivi? She will come tomorrow.” Olivia answered before dissolving into a conversation with Rayan.

I sighed, entering a shop which had snow globes stacked on their entrance.

“Charlotte?” Rayan called out as they both entered after me.

“Yes?” I touched the pretty designs, but one caught my attention. It was about the size of my hand. In the glass globe, there was cotton snow. A couple standing right beside a small tree, holding hands, kissing. A perfect gift.

“Let’s go to Dubai for Christmas.”

[iloveanimalsmorethanhumans]

The elderly couple stepped across the threshold, admiring the understated furnishings and fine silver. Their feet sank into thick plush carpet. The doors closed behind them and the pale woman who let them in said quietly

"He will be with you in a moment. Please, have a seat. Would you like a drink? Some wine perhaps?"

"Should we?" The woman asked, raising her fingers to her lips. "Is it....allowed? It won't...you know...cause an...issue?" She inquired hesitantly.

The pale woman smiled "No ma'am, it's perfectly fine"

"Well, I suppose..." She replied, turning her eyes to her husband.

"I suppose indeed! Live it up, I say!" He declared, grinning widely and looking, for the first time in months, genuinely happy.

His wife smiled and nodded. "OK then."

"I'll return in a moment. Please, have a seat!" She spread her hands, indicating a plush and comfortable looking love seat.

They sat, she, primly crossing her ankles, hands in her lap, feeling slightly nervous.

Her husband sat comfortably beside her, sinking into the cushions with a sigh, throwing an arm over her shoulder. "Don't worry darling. Everything will be just fine. I promise you!" He leaned forward and planted a noisy kiss on her soft cheek, just as he had always done. She smiled and sighed.

"I do hope so."

"Ah! Hello! And here you are!" Said a deep, heavily accented voice behind them.

Their host made his way around the loveseat, his feet barely seeming to touch the ground. Quite a feat in such a large man. He held two glasses of wine out to them.

"Only the finest for my guests! I don't know a thing about the stuff but it was very expensive and the sommelier simply raved about it! I do hope he was correct."

The old man leaned forward, grunting slightly, and accepted a glass, passing it carefully to his wife before accepting the other.

"Splendid!" Their host enthused.

He sat in the heavily upholstered chair across from them. It resembled a throne, carved from some ancient wood, rich and glowing with polish, the cloth deep red and shot with gold in strange patterns the eye could not discern.

He crossed his legs and clasped his knee, beaming at them.

"So, I know the story of course, and I'm so glad to be of service!"

The old woman's hand trembled slightly and she spilled a few drops of wine.

"Nervous? It's ok. I understand completely! But I promise it will be a simple and painless process. Let's not talk about that now. How was the drive?"

The old man snorted almost choking on his wine.

"Fine! It was fine. I'm sorry, this just....well it wasn't what we expected."

Their host raised his hands and smiled, flashing his very white teeth.

"I know, I know. It never is as expected." He chuckled, steepling his fingers in front of his mouth, his eyes shining over them, almost black in the soft lighting. "Please, do relax and enjoy. I insist!" He leaned forward uncrossing his legs and suddenly becoming serious. "There is one thing though, a small matter that we must attend too. My deepest apologies, but it has recently become...er...necessary."

He snapped his fingers twice, quickly and the pale woman reappeared holding a tray. She set it down before him. The tray held a neat stack of papers typed, and carefully aligned. The paper was thick and expensive looking. He looked steadily at his guests his voice suddenly grave and important.

"Due to recent, ehrm, events, we have found it necessary to insist upon a form of written consent. I won't go into detail but it is all quite legal. The lawyers insisted." He sighed, rolling his eyes.

"Elena is a notary and will observe the proceedings and add her seal and signature. She took the course online and passed easily!"

He beamed at the pale woman, she ducked her head shyly and smiled.

"Please do read over it carefully. If you have questions I can have Elena call the lawyer. It's really very detailed. Those lawyers certainly do enjoy, ahem, language and such."

The couple looked at each other in surprise. "Oh!" The woman said "I hadn't thought..."

Their host sighed, leaning back

"I know, I know. It really is bothersome but apparently these days consent does not come without a lot of very big words. I never thought I'd see the day, but you never can tell in this...ehrm....form of service."

He flashed a quick apologetic smile, those white teeth bright, the canines thin and sharp.

The couple put down their glasses, carefully reading through the document, the old man mouthing a word here and there in wonder.

"Accidental survival?" He whispered

"Potential permanent damage to skin, clothes and... hair?" The woman murmured quickly looking up and raising a hand to her head.

"Ahem...yes well, sometimes there is a brief moment of...ehrm...panic and were someone to unexpectedly pull away...well....hair might be...lost...should that person...perhaps then run screaming....well, it creates quite a scene, and I am forced to discontinue. Rare occurrence really... just the once..." his voice trailed off, and he looked quite uncomfortable.

The man picked up the fine gold pen next to the documents.

"I am here of my own free will. I do consent and intend to follow through!" And without reading further, he signed with a flourish.

"Wonderful!" Their host exclaimed.

The old woman smiled nervously glancing at her husband.

"And you?" Their host asked, extending a large hand. The woman noticed his fingernails, long, pointed and well manicured.

"Well, darling, as long as you are happy it's all I ever wished!" She took the pen from her husband and signed carefully.

Elena stepped forward with her own pen. A surprisingly ordinary ball point. She signed quickly and efficiently, embossing the thick paper with an official looking stamp, then she picked up the tray and disappeared.

Their host looked at the woman, "you'll get a copy." She nodded soberly.

"Well then!" He said cheerfully, his eyes sparkling, "shall we, kind sir?"

He stood fluidly, like a stretching cat, extending to his full intimidating height.

"We will go to the courtyard outside then. It's better there. A lovely night, I understand! Madam" he said, extending his hand towards the old woman who stood with her husband, her arm through his, protectively. She gave him her hand. He bent and barely brushed his lips across her knuckles "I ask that you stay here. This can be...unpleasant. I will return in a moment. Elena will put on some music or perhaps, the sound of the ocean? It's very soothing. I know this is difficult" his eyes were warm as he gazed into hers.

She felt calm and relaxed. "Yes. That would be lovely"

She turned to her husband and kissed him passionately, one last time. "I'll always love you."

"And I, you " he replied. Holding her close.

"Alright then, Mr Dracul....I'm ready."

"Oh, please! Call me Vlad! We are going to be getting very close indeed! Let's not stand on formalities! Bid adieu to this little life and all its inconveniences and illness.

Sincerely, I thank you both for this honor."

And with that he led the old man away, the cancer eating away at him soon to be discarded, the healthy remaining blood to serve it's purpose, with consent.

[kats-fic-recs]

The Best Stranger Things Fics I read in 2022

Common Cents

Making a will at eighteen seems incredibly morbid. The lawyer stares at him long and hard the entire time. She acts like he's contagious, like she might catch her death from him or maybe he'll ruin her rug by dropping dead in her office. Steve figures she has nothing to worry about. If anything's going to kill him, it's probably going to be a monster from the Upside Down.

-

In which Steve hunts monsters, becomes a deputy, makes a will, and finds a family. Among other things.

darlin’ you give love (a bad name)

The first time he hears Dustin and Mike mention the name Eddie Munson he almost walks into a VHS display at work.

Steve wants to ask them how Eddie’s doing but then his face from that last party flashes into his head and he always clams up. If he was Eddie he’d want nothing to do with him and rightly so.

Instead Steve teasingly complains about how much time they spend with Eddie and that’s as far as it goes.

To Be Loved For No Reason At All

It all starts with Steve finding Eddie Munson in Alison Brown’s bathtub.

Or, how one night leads to a conversation, leads to shotgunning, leads to confessions, leads to The Rocky Horror Picture Show. Steve's just along for the ride.

sub-culture

“Is he whining about Eddie being mean to him again?” Robin is leaning in the doorway, eating a leftover slice that’s probably cold by now. “You talk about him more than you talk about girls, Steve, it’s getting concerning. Anyone would think you had a crush.”

or, steve is pretty convinced eddie now hates him. turns out eddie has the opposite problem.

get you back (by my side)

Eddie hasn't spoken to Gareth and the others since whatever went down with Chrissy Cunningham, now Gareth sees him playing basketball with Steve Harrington and a bunch of kids, what the fuck is going on?

Sinclair sighs longingly.

“Okay, man, I can get behind you on the sweet and salty,” says Gareth, “but New Coke?”

“He was crazy for it,” says Harrington, grinning all fond at the back of Sinclair’s head like he’s retelling the story of his toddler’s foray into the world of art and talking Gareth through all the monstrosities in pride of place on the fridge. “Weird kid.”

Eddie is smiling at the side of Harrington’s face and Jesus Christ, Gareth never wants to meet another gay man in his whole life if their taste is Steve fucking Harrington.

our house (in the middle of our street)

He's in the market for a house, it's not his fault the Creel Murder House is the cheapest place he can find. It's kind of the perfect house, really, Steve's got a big family.

Eddie fumbles in rolling the blunt. They’re sitting in Eddie’s room while he rolls on the tray balanced on his knees. “You’re — you’re giving me a key?”

“Yeah. I don’t know if you want to move out of here but uh… option is there if you uhm, need it?”

He stays staring at Steve, fingers paused over the tray like the ridiculous caricature of a stoner caught red handed by the cops. “For real? What about rent?”

“Yeah man, of course. I know you haven’t been sleeping great here for obvious reasons and like, a new place isn’t going to help that much but…” He shrugs. “Got more rooms than I know what to do with, so fuck rent. I’m getting keys for you and Rob next week and maybe some for the kids, I don’t know if I trust them with keys to my house.”

when you need me, call me (no matter where you are)

Steve isn't having the best time of it but he's trying to make time for his kids. Then everything goes to shit again. At least he gets a fugitive boyfriend out of it.

When it all starts happening again Steve mentally blames Tammy Thompson’s singing, probably woke Vecna up and he was all like “these people need to remember their favourite songs, because if that’s the musical talent in this town… boy are they fucked” or something along those lines. Or maybe he’s just feeling a little bit insane because he just saw Max — little Max with the red hair who scared him a little bit and saved him from Billy that one time — floating up in the sky like, like an angel. And he couldn’t do a thing but hope Max really, really likes Kate Bush.

strung through the tether

The talk explained how it all worked, why his pain was her pain and vice versa, but it didn’t answer any of the questions Robin would come to formulate in the following years.

Questions like: what makes someone your soulmate? Questions like: why do so many people get married even if they aren't soulmates? Questions like: who ever said it was a boy?

your shadow's red (like a film i've seen)

Three days after Vecna, Robin tries to kiss Steve. Tries to be something he deserves. Someone who can fuck him, be with him. Something better, a good person like she isn't. She tries to not be fucked up. Steve doesn't let her.

If only for a moment they are wild and cold, faces up to the unreflective sky, just a boy and a girl holding hands watching the stars as the wind tugs and pulls them, kindly cruel in a way that mends.

Maybe they don’t need anyone else, she thinks, maybe they can stay there until the wind strips them to their bones. She wouldn’t mind dying if it was with Steve.

He turns to her and she thinks he might kiss her but then he’s just holding her against his chest and it feels like such an impossibly mean thought to have about Steve, to even think that he might do that to her, that she starts crying. Sometimes she thinks she doesn’t deserve him and he doesn’t deserve how she thinks about him. He’s just so much good sometimes Robin thinks something must turn for the worst, surely King Steve isn’t all gone, surely at some point he’s going to reveal himself: he was making fun of her the whole time, trying to make her normal.

feel the magic (there's something that drives me wild)

Robin is drunk and not for the first time wishes she could fall in love with Steve Harrington. Wishes she was 'normal'.

It’s dumb, really dumb, that she still wants to crow to the whole of Hawkins High that she knows what Steve looks like in the morning, in his boxers, coming out of the shower. She still wants to be normal, and it stings sometimes so harshly she thinks she might cry, that she’s never going to swoon over Steve’s arms or his stupid hair.

i wanna make a supersonic man (out of you)

Lucas is the man of the group, he knows this. He's got to be the man, like Steve, and wear polos and khakis and come between evil and the weak and be a lady killer and a charming, funny, sweet guy. Like Steve who has started hanging out with Eddie Munson and getting piercings and wearing eyeliner and not being the man Lucas thought he was.

“Steve is that an earring?” says Dustin, at one of his highest pitches, slap bang in the middle of one of Eddie’s tirades.

Everyone pauses. Number one, you never interrupt Eddie, especially not during D&D. Number two, what? (Lucas has strong suspicions he can’t let Max ever find out about this, or she’s going to break-up with him and become a full-time Steve admirer.)

They all lean forwards.

Steve shifts slightly uncomfortably, but he looks amused. “Yeah.” He shrugs. And there it is, a single tiny silver hoop in his left ear. Lucas stares, amazed.

“You’re a guy,” says Lucas, without thinking about it.

Steve only laughs. “I am aware, Lucas, thank you.”

lover boy pizza

A follow-through to the idea “fuck it make em all gay” ft the addition of: no no no jonathan and argyle as a couple but they don’t know everyone else is also coupled up and they’re high as shit trying to act normal on this now-quintuple date they think is just-bro-time.

(The Real) Stranger Things Season 3

(Because after (gestures at what Netflix gave us), we really needed a rewrite.)

It's summer vacation, 1985.

After everything that's happened in the past two years, Will just wants to go back to the way things were - and the Party seems to be racing on ahead, leaving him behind as they get swept up in the new adventure of being teenagers. But when something darker threatens to reenter their lives, the Party has more to deal with than just dating and summer shenanigans.

Joyce knows that something is wrong - she can just feel it. And Hopper knows by now to trust her instinct. Together they set out to find answers - and find that not all is as they assumed.

Unappreciated and heckled at her internship at The Hawkins Post, Nancy picks up the phone to a strange call. Sensing a story, she grabs Jonathan and chases the lead.

El isn't sure who she is - or if she has the strength to defeat the evil that's rearing its head in this once-quiet town.

Dustin picks up a strange code on his ham radio.

Steve hates his Scoops uniform.

Something strange is stirring in Hawkins - something that wants to get back in.

One summer can change everything.

kiss it better

Of course Will is here. They take care of each other. It’s what they do.

or: Mike and Will, through the years and in between the lines of friendship and something more.

I Never Find Out 'Til I'm Head Over Heels

Wherein Mike believes he’s being obvious, Will doesn’t know what he believes, and the pair of them could use a lesson or two in effective communication. Somehow all of this has both nothing and everything to do with five years' worth of school dances.

The Dad Who Stepped Up

Hopper’s many attempts at bonding with his youngest unofficial stepson over the course of their first year in Hawkins.

Sometimes it goes well, other times he’s trying to see if he’s unlocked his daughter’s ability to glare someone (Michael Wheeler) to death.

i’d love to see me from your point of view

Now that Will’s sitting and Mike’s the one that’s standing, he looks impossibly tall. Tall and lanky, and huge. He should sit back down, Will thinks, lay back down next to Will and stay in their own secluded little bubble.

“I really want to kiss you,” Mike says, and Will’s eyes snap back up to his so violently he thinks he hears his own neck crack with the force of it.

“Don’t,” Will croaks, before his brain has even processed the words. “Don’t say that.”

“Okay,” Mike says easily, still staring. And what the actual fuck is going on? Is Will hallucinating? Is the weed making him hallucinate? “So sausage and pepperoni?”

Will stares dumbly at him. “Um - yeah. Yes.”

“Cool,” Mike replies and then just turns around and leaves Will sitting dumbly in his own room.

or

Mike and Will get high on Jonathan’s weed and Mike has an amazing idea.

you rearrange me 'til i'm sane

Will has never had a girlfriend (or a boyfriend) before. There may or may not be one person behind the reason why.

i hate accidents (except when we went from friends to this).

The first time it happens, Will classifies it as a little accident.

When he wakes, the morning sun is burning through the window onto their faces, and Mike’s cursing as he stands to close the curtains, stumbling all the way.

“Scoot over,” he grumbles, voice dry, and for a second Will can’t do anything other than sigh like a lovesick idiot. It’s a second too late for Mike, because he grumbles more words Will doesn’t catch under his breath and then physically pushes Will towards the wall to lay beside him, arm over Will’s middle. A second of silence passes, then Mike sighs, only to whine: “Fuck, my head hurts.”

Will can’t help it: he breaks down laughing, much to Mike’s offense.

---------------

Alternatively: five times Mike kissed Will, and one time Will kissed back.

all this time (how could you not know?)

Mike sighs, looking down at his hands. "I always thought I would end up with someone more similar to me, you know? Someone I can talk about, like, hobbies and music and stuff with, without them visibly losing interest halfway through.”

You have more in common with him than El, says the voice in Will’s head. He wonders, briefly, whether it would be weird to shove his face back into the pillow and scream.

Will is definitely not qualified to be giving out any relationship advice. For one, he's never actually dated anyone before. Second, one of the people in said relationship is his sister. And third, the other person is the guy he's sort of in love with. There's no possible way this could backfire. Right?

sealed with a kiss

“Dude,” Dustin says, sounding kind of horrified but also kind of delirious with elation. “Oh my God, you like him. You like Will. Will. As in, our Will. Our best friend Will.”

“I do not–” Mike tries, even though he’d kind of just admitted to accidentally kissing Will Byers, a little, so maybe that’s an entirely fruitless road to go down.

Listen. No one should ever let Mike make decisions right after he wakes up from a nap, okay? Especially not decisions where Will is concerned. This is so not his fault.

keep glowing (come back)

And despite this, he will gather the pages and leaf through them. Read the words he didn’t want to think about during the daytime because they were wrong and awful and shitty. Half-scribbled confessions and outbursts and meltdowns, memories and stray thoughts and promises that he’d nearly forgotten to keep.

Skip through them after the first few, skim the bottom of the pages in a move just like El’s, see what she always wanted to see: Love, Mike scrawled at the bottom of every page.

-

or: mike & will through the years

people like you find it easy (naked to see)

Will sees these people. These pink people and these blue people. He sees the way they fit together and hates the way he doesn't ever want a pink half of his soul, he wants something blue, something wrong.

Will still remembers that ice cold shock in the rain that started in his bones and reverberated outwards until the edges of him were static, fizzing and unreal, and the only thing about him that was fact, immovably and intrinsically true, that it wasn’t Mike’s fault, it wasn’t anyone’s but his own, that he didn’t like girls. The bike ride, the rain slick on his face like a membrane, his whole body burning and freezing all at the same time, still blurry at the edges, and the only thing, the only thing, he knew about himself to be true was that he liked boys, he liked boys in a way he wasn’t supposed to. He was broken, a freak like Jonathan had said, but not a freak in a good way, he was bad and rotten.

He had wanted to blame it on the Upside Down, back then. He had wanted it to be something out of his control. But he knows, knows like Lonnie knew when he was just a kid, that he has always been this way. He’s always been wrong in some unfixable, innate way that will stay with him until he dies.

home is where the heart is

“It’s a good thing,” Will reassures, and his thumb swipes over Mike’s cheek. Mike thinks he might explode. “It means you’re nice to look at. Artists would love you.”

Mike’s heart feels like it’s about to burst out of his chest. Will is still looking at him, and he swallows, throat dry. “Yeah?”

Will’s own face reddens, like he’d just thought about what he said. “Yeah,” he answers, and Mike grins.

Living in a shared apartment with Will is all Mike could ask for, except for the part where he keeps thinking about kissing Will in the middle of their kitchen.

i'll find myself in the moonlight

He looks up at him, eyebrows drawn together. “Do you not love her?"

Mike shrinks back. “What?"

He hadn’t meant to say it. He wouldn’t have, if he’d stopped to think about it for half a second. But it’s too late to take it back, and he can’t breathe until he knows the answer, and he looks at him resolutely and says, “Do you only love her because of what I said?

Something darkens on Mike’s face, twisting it into a shape Will’s never seen. “Get out.”

It’s not a no.

or: Mike and Will share a room, and Mike finds out the truth about the painting.

mike wheeler's guide to falling in love with a superhero

“Uh-huh,” Mike says faintly, and he yelps when they narrowly avoid the edge of a shining skyscraper, and his hands clutch onto Spiderman instinctively. “Oh – my fucking God, that –”

Spiderman’s fingers press a little firmly into Mike’s shirt. "Just – hang on!"

"What do you mean just hang – was that a pun," Mike sputters, clutching onto Spiderman for dear life as they swing through the city, and he can hear the superhero laugh through the racing wind in his ears, the rumble of it under Mike’s arm wrapped around his middle.

In a city of superheroes, Mike keeps running into Spiderman, much to his dismay.

On a completely different and unrelated note, Mike also attempts to woo and charm his neighbor into a date.

Heavy Hopes

Mike walks in on his roommate making out with another guy, and gets really upset about it. For all of the normal, straight reasons.

[is-on-its-way]

Never Again Again

Post-Episode: s04e13 Never Again

Part of the Scully is a human Series

---

The hospital after Scully gets beaten by Ed Jerse

She was suddenly aware. She felt a blanket over her and heard a beeping of machines, her heartbeat. She heard a low conversation. She kept her eyes closed, her body relaxed into the soft bed. She didn’t think shed ever felt more tired. 

She was aware of voices, they came closer and closer down a tunnel until she vaguely recognized a familiar one. Tidbits of the conversation drifted into her head. 

“She was collapsed when we found her in the basement…

… furnace door was open, we think he may have been trying to put her in there…

…Im surprised an FBI agent would get herself in this mess.”

“She’s usually more careful than this she’s just had a difficult time recently, her sister died recently and we’ve had some difficulties with our work. She’s a good agent.”

“Well you know what they say a man who takes advantage once…”

“Thank you officer”

Mulder walked over to her bed side and a scraping told her he sat himself in a chair. 

She opened one eye groggily, to the bright sharp light. And furrowed her brows at the sharp spike of pain she felt pierce her head. 

“Welcome back” said a semi sarcastic voice.

She shook her head. Opening her eyes trying to get used to the light.

“What are you doing here?”

“Is that any way to treat a concerned visitor at your sickbed?”

She turned and looked at him fully exasperated.

“I thought you were on vacation?”

Mulder shrugged “I came back early, and I was heading up here to check on the case when I got word you’d been taken to the hospital so I came right here.”

“To check on the case?” She said incredulous. 

“Well you weren’t answering my calls and I needed to know my case was going alright.

“You’re case” she said turning to look up at the ceiling.

There it was again. Mulder's constant need to claim their work as his own. As if she was a secretary or a first year just out of Quantico trainee. She wanted to say something, but look at the mess shed gotten herself into. She’d behaved like she’d never had field experience. But did she regret it? Did she regret taking all her frustrations and anger out with a seeming murderer?

“Eds not guilty Mulder, the Russians that tattoo shop, they use an ink laced with rye, it was infected with a neurotoxin. He’s not in his right mind. He’s really a sweet man.”

Something like anger or was it jealousy? flashed across Mulder's face. “He almost killed you Scully. He was going to throw you into the furnace like he did the woman in the apartment below him.”

“I was able to talk him down. He should… someone should tell his lawyers about the poison anyway.”

“Okay” Mulder said “for now I think they want to monitor your concussion for a couple hours and they’ll call me when you get discharged. Ill drive us back to DC.” He stood and made for the door

“Where are you gong?”

“Im following up on this Russian Mafia tattoo parlour, cant have everyone getting psychotic moldy bread tattoos can we?” He tapped the door with his hand and nodded to her. 

She pursed her lips in answer. 

———

The Office

Door opens revealing a still tired and bruised SCULLY. MULDER walks up behind her and into the office. He is sarcastic.)

MULDER : Welcome back. You look a lot better than you did in the hospital. And congratulations for making an personal appearance in the Xfiles for the second time. (Gets file from cabinet) It’s a world’s record. (He keeps looking for a response. There is none.) Ed Jerse is in custody at the St. John’s burn facility in Philadelphia. Traces of ergot were found in his bloodstream as in yours, but not to the degree that should cause hallucinogenic ergotism. (SCULLY sits) He’ll undergo psychiatric evaluation after recovering from burn trauma. Comrade Svo has been shut down, he was under investigation for having connections to my friend Pudovkin. Case closed on Boris Badenov, which is really a shame because I was thinking of having an "N.Y." tattooed on my ass to commemorate the Yankees’ World Series victory. Better late than never, hunh.

(SCULLY picks rose petal off his desk. MULDER watches her. Then rises uncomfortably and goes back to file cabinet.)

MULDER : The uh, field office in Dallas is uh, receiving reports of the image of a missing child appearing on a blank billboard outside of Arlington... (Sits again, opening new file.) ....so.... All this, because I’ve ... because I didn’t get you a desk?

SCULLY : (Looking up at him) Not everything is about you, Mulder. This is my life.

MULDER : Yes but it’s m - -

(SCULLY looks at him questioningly. He starts to speak again, then sighs and fiddles with things on his desk. Uncomfortable silence in the room.)

The silence lasted a long while before anyone spoke. It had lasted a long while already. The car ride home from Philadelphia had been a completely silent hour and 45 minutes. Mulder had even turned on the radio to calm the buzzing of his mind without Scully to talk to. Shed been content to sit and stare out of her window deep in thought the entire way back. 

Mulder looked down and fiddled with his pen. He almost said it. ‘mine’. A thought he’d kept deep in his soul for a very long time. Her time was his, their time was the X files. He’d thought they were both devoted. Now he was questioning that, and Scully seemed to be as well. 

He didn’t know what to say, he wanted to move past this whole thing and onto the next case, but there was nothing it seemed he could say that would move her past this thing, what ever it was, that she was stuck on. How was it he understood the motives of serial killers with ease but profiling Dana Scully left his mind completely blank?

“I don’t know what to do here Scully. I don’t know what Im supposed to say to get you to move past this?”

Scully looked up sharply. “To get me to move past this?” She said in a derisive tone. 

Mulder shrugged and threw up his hands, waiting for her to respond. Hoping she would respond.

“It wasn’t about the desk Mulder” Scully said softly

“Well spell it out for me Dana.  Because Im not understanding” He said looking her in the face, earnest. “And I want to”

“I feel sometimes…”Scully didn’t look at him but down at the rose petal. “I have little control over my professional life, maybe even personal life and the little I do have Im allowed only because you allow it. You don't trust me with the X Files. You treat me like you’re my superior, when were supposed to be partners in this.” She spoke playing with the rose petal in her hands.

“Well not to get all grade school, but I was here first.” Mulder said without a hint of derision

Scully looked up at him. “Sharing is caring.” She tilted her head.

Mulder nodded sighing deeply “I can work on that, if you'll let me know sooner when something is wrong so it doesn't boil up inside you so much you go and get yourself…”

“You think I went out looking for trouble on purpose? I wanted to go and get myself beat up?”

"You think I think less of you for getting assaulted by that man?" He said angry and hurt.

“Are you?”

“No Scully! Thats what men do. Men do that because they…” he struggled to come up with an example in his anger “they stubbed their toe on a Friday! I was worried about you” He rose from his chair. 

She looked up at his face in surprise. “Oh” she said simply and baldly

“Why is that so difficult for you to believe? Have I treated you so poorly these past four years?”

“No” she said calmly “But you keep pushing me away whether intentional or otherwise in your treatment of me.”

“So what you’re going to quit on me?” He said voicing his darkest fear his brow furrowed in frustration at himself for bringing it up.

‘On me’ she thought to herself. Still all about him or was that about her?

"You think because Im unhappy with one aspect of our partnership, Im looking to what? Leave without a second thought? What you fail to realize is I am invested in the X Files and this conspiracy we've found. Its not all about you Mulder. We may not agree on the cause but we agree on the need for it to be brought into the light." 

She had risen from her chair now and her voice was getting louder as she went on.

“I want to be treated like your equal in this office. I don't care about the name plate or the desk or the fact I have to knock every time I enter because I don't want to catch you watching one of those tapes that ‘arent’ in that drawer.” She pointed to that drawer. “I want you to treat me like… like I care because I do. About the work… and about you.”

“Well I care about you!” He glared back at her

“Fine!” She threw her hands up

“Fine!” He leaned forward a bit over the desk

They both sat back down, avoiding each other with their eyes. A bit embarrassed. Scully started after an awkward pause where their minds whirled on what they had just admitted to each other. “What were you saying about Dallas?” 

“Oh yeah Arlington actually…” Mulder said perking up at the change in subject.

End.

[dr-spencer-reids-queen]

Penelope: Part Two

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Female!Reader

Word Count: ~1.5k

Warnings: canon violence, canon language, canon talk of death, methods of kill

Author’s Note: I am so sorry I haven’t posted. I was sick with the flu and completely forgot about it. I will be posted both episodes now!

I do not own anything from Criminal Minds. All credit goes to their respective owners. If there is any warnings that exceed the normal death/kills from the show, I will list them. If you’ve seen the show, then it’s the same level of angst unless otherwise stated

Hotch's phone rings and he answers it quickly.

"Hotchner. ...  Good. ... We'll be right there." He hangs up with a relieved look on his face. "She's up."

You three head back to the hospital just in time to see Penelope before she falls asleep again from exhaustion. You walk into her room with Derek, JJ, and Spencer. Everyone wants to cry, but if you start crying, then Penelope will start crying.

"Hi. No tears. I'm afraid if I start crying I'll come unstapled," she sighs.

"How are you feeling?" Derek asks.

"Confused, stupid, and in pain."

"Are you up for some questions?" JJ wonders.

"I never saw it coming. He seemed... deliciously normal."

"You know him?"

"He was your date, right?" you whisper and take her hand.

"You were right. I should have trusted it," she says to Derek. "It's that guy I told you about. The one I met at the coffee shop. I wanted to believe he was interested in me. I let my guard down."

"Do you have any idea why he would have done this? Did he threaten you? Did he want something?"

"I just thought he liked me," she sniffles.

"We need a name, Pen."

"James Colby Baylor." Your team leaves the room to give her some space, but she grabs your hand and JJ's. "Will you two stay with me for a second?"

"Sure," you nod and sit back down next to her. "I saw what happened, Penelope. I saw you while you were being operated on. I told you to fight for your life, and I'm glad you listened."

"I'm not ready to die yet."

"We will find James and take him down. He won't ever hurt you again."

"Promise me something."

"Anything," JJ says.

"Please don't talk about me like I'm a victim. I'm not."

"We won't. We promise," you nod in agreement with JJ.

You lean up and kiss her forehead before leaving the room with JJ to give Penelope some rest. You two join Derek and Spencer's side. Detective Walker sent over everything he had on the guy. He used a revolver, and the only person who uses a revolver is someone who doesn't want to leave shell casings behind as evidence. There were no witnesses, and James staged it to look like a robbery to throw people off. If he's smart enough to use forensic countermeasures, then the odds he gave Penelope a fake name is very likely.

"What did she say?" Spencer asks.

"She made us promise not to talk about her like a victim," JJ says. "Excuse me."

"I asked her to go out last night, but she was pissed at me. She blew me off," Derek sighs once JJ left.

"You ended up in church?" you ask.

"Yeah. What does it mean? On one hand, if she'd gone out with me, she would have never got shot. On the other hand... What are the odds that the first time I pray in twenty years, she's on the table?"

"She's asking for you three," a nurse says from inside the room.

You three head inside and smile at Penelope.

"Good news, bad news. The morphine's wearing off. When I was in the ambulance, I could hear the song 'Heroes' playing in my head. I kept flashing in and out of consciousness. Everything was really bright, and I remember thinking, wait... is David Bowie really God?"

"We have a sketch artist coming in," Spencer reveals.

"I'm still a little hazy."

"It's okay. Anything you tell us will help. Did this guy say what he did for a living?"

"He said he was a lawyer."

"Did people know him where you went?"

"He said he wanted to show me a new place. It was half an hour away."

"You drove together? What kind of car?" Derek asks.

"A white four-door sedan. American. It smelled new."

"Rental car, maybe?" Spencer says to you and Derek.

"I don't know. I don't look at things like you guys do. I don't see danger--"

"Okay, take it easy," Derek calms her down. "Take it easy. What else can you remember?"

"He smelled good, and he was a little nervous. I thought he was just afraid to kiss me good night," she says with tears in her eyes.

"You sure you're up for this?"

"I could hear him walking. He leaned over me and I held my breath so he'd think I was dead," she sniffles.

"We should stop," you whisper.

Penelope is nowhere near ready to go home, and for the next four days, you and your team worked endlessly trying to find out who this guy really is. James Colby Baylor has to be a fake name, and if it is, then you need to find out his real name and fast. However, four days and no good news. Penelope has been in and out of sleep the entire time, but a sketch artists was able to grab her description of the man she went on a date with.

That photo has been taken to the coffee shop where she met him, the restaurant, and everything else in between. Nothing has come up, even when the picture was run through ViCAP. No luck with rental car services, no prints were left at the scene, so shell casings, and the cell phone that the guy used to call Penelope at work was a disposable one. This guy knows how to stay off the grid, and that makes him more of a mystery than you thought he was going to be.

The only person who can help you right now is Penelope, so you need to go back to the hospital and talk to her about the date she went on. Maybe a detail was overlooked that she might remember. Everything matters, even things that may not seem as important. Spencer and Derek are already at the hospital where they've been for the past four days.

You walk into the room, interrupting their conversation.

"Hey, I'm here to help with remembering what happened. If you allow me, I'm going to take your hand and I might be able to see what happened. I might be able to see something you might have missed. If it's okay with you, of course."

"It's no problem," she says.

You take a seat next to her and grab her hand gently, running your thumb across the back of her hand.

"Whenever you're ready."

She begins with the restaurant they went to, and it's like you were right there. Through her reenactment and descriptions, you're able to connect with her feelings and transfer them into memories. James and Penelope walk into the restaurant, and though you can't hear what they're saying, you can tell he is a smooth talker. The waiter brings them to a table in the corner of the room where he takes a seat right in the corner so he can see the whole room while Penelope takes a seat across from her.

The waiter passes out menus, and Penelope is unsure of what bottle of wine to get. He points one out, ensuring her that she will like it even if she doesn't drink that kind of wine. They talk and laugh with each other, talking about their job (you only assume).

"Penelope, I know it's gotta be hard to keep reliving this," Derek says when he sees her getting frustrated.

"I just don't know what else there is to remember."

"Let's start with the behavior. That's all profiling really is, just noticing behavior," Spencer tries.

"Sweetheart, any details you can remember will tell us who he is. Okay? So, let's go back to when you first arrived at that restaurant. Was he nervous?"

"No, the opposite, actually. He was charming, and when the menus were passed out to us, he insisted we order a white wine even though I only drink red."

"So, he was trying to impress you by showing you how he can take charge."

"I guess so."

"Tell me about his watch," Spencer says, assuming he was wearing one.

"It was a fake rolex."

"Are you sure about that?"

"I know my knockoffs. He kept playing with it as if he wanted me to look at it. It's how I know it's a knockoff."

"What else do you remember?" you ask with your eyes still closed.

"He kept asking me about my job, and he then talked about his. He said he was a lawyer, a city attorney. He told me he had a murder case dismissed for judicial inepptitude, and he went into private practice."

With all of this new information, you took this back to the rest of the team who is back at Quantico. You want to give Penelope more time to rest, so you decided to work on this new information. Maybe with it, you can find out who he really is. Once you got back to Quantico, you told the rest of the team exactly what she said.

"City attorneys don't try murder cases. He knows enough to use legal terminology, but he's not actually a working lawyer," Spencer says.

"I think we're looking at someone who failed out of law school or didn't pass the bar."

"Did Garcia say if he gave any details about the cases he was supposedly working on?" JJ asks.

"No specifics."

"If he failed out of the system, it could explain why he's got a working vocabulary and not much more. It could also explain his anger. Even in his lie, he rails against other people's incompetence."

"Well, he's clearly a narcissist," Rossi says. "The clothes, the watch, and the subtle hints at where he went to school. He's faking humility when he's saying New Haven and Cambridge instead of Yale and Harvard."

"JJ, we need an analyst who can put our information through the legal databases."

"I'm on it."

x

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