#as much i love some evil lesbians

[theikusabastash]

okay fine, i ship it

[aroaessidhe]

2024 reads / storygraph

Long Live Evil

a young woman dying from cancer is offered the chance to enter the world of her & her sister’s favourite book series, to steal a magical flower that could save her in the real world

when she finds herself in the body of the villainess who’s about to be executed, she befriends and manipulates her way through the story to reach her goals (and have some fun along the way), but quickly learns that things might not go the way she expects

[shrimparts-blog888]

Iwneiwnwiwjwjw i have absolutely no clue how to draw clothes so that they don t look like minecraft building blocks but hey i hope y'all enjoy this 😭🫶🏻

[wickedhawtwexler]

yeah it's important to create a character who's flawed but likeable, realistic, interesting, dynamic, etc. but the most important part of creating a character is asking yourself: will the people of www.tumblr.com go insane about them?

[scribbleshrimp]

i miss escam so much it might actually kill me

*krill

[enlighten3d]

@thedndgoblinwholivesinyourwalls @thedndgoblinwholivesinyourwalls @thedndgoblinwholivesinyourwalls @thedndgoblinwholivesinyourwalls @thedndgoblinwholivesinyourwalls

LARKIEEE HI LARKIE I KNOW IVE TOLD YOU HAPPY BIRTHDAY ALREADY BUT HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!! YOURE A WHOLE YEAR OLDER NOW!! WOAH!!!!!!! I HOPE YOU HAWV A GOOD YEAR AND WISH THEE HEALTH AND THE BEST OF LUCK WITH NEVER GETTING MURDERED BY ARTBLOCK AGAIN !!! okay thats a lot of caps sorry

anygays!!!!!! i have... i have a gift for you.... a poem about jadele... i think its very cool... i did make up some stuff for it but i think thats par for the course now

have !! jadele poem... hehe [: all i will tell you is that its janette pov, you can figure out the rest yourself [:

--- (its under the cut bcs its Long lmao) ---

I'm forced to wonder, if you regret it at all. If us ending up here has changed anything in your mind. I doubt it - I know for a fact it hasn't.

I know that that glint in your eyes - vicious, vindictive, violent, passionate in all the worst ways - it's the same as it's ever been. It couldn't ever be otherwise.

I search for that spot of regret in myself, sure to be blooming in/on my chest, encroaching on flesh and bone, replacing and ripping and rending. It's not there for me to find.

It settles; the knowledge - that this was inevitable, never less, never more - as I grab your hands, I pull you towards me.

I've found something else blooming there now, in the place that should belong to Regret. It burns, all-consuming, as it rips its way out of me, tearing spitefully as it blocks what I meant to say. I've found no part of me that wishes it were Regret.

I could label what is there as Hatred, as I could many things. It could be that look in your eyes, what love has bloomed into. It's just another thing to call what's been inside me all along.

I hold you tight, as you try to break away from me. There's no want in you, when I give you what you thought you wanted from me. I can't say I've missed the feeling of your lips on mine, after everything.

I share with you, what festers inside me. It's your fault, it's your fault (just as much as it is mine?). I think you deserve it.

It's simple, in the end, watching that which I have no name for other than Revenge, tear its way through you- through me- through us- You can't even leave now. It's worth it, in my eyes.

I smile, a bloody, broken, blasphemous thing, one last time, into your lips. I can't let you go either, now.

I let go.

It burns, and I can't even call it Revenge anymore. It's Pain, Pride, Power, Penance- blue. They're blue. I think they're pretty, these blue flowers. It's almost picturesque, the way they burst out of your eyes, through my skin, into your heart. I think my mother used to like these. I can almost call up a fading memory, of a vase of sapphire-blue flowers, standing proud on the dining table where we never ate. My mother wouldn't be - isn't - proud of me. She's right though, that they're pretty, even when they're covered in blood and gore and flesh and

I settle on a name for it. It's the End.

[nyenylon]

DOODLE DUMP!!!! AGAIN!!!!!

[mokeonn]

Currently I have so many bg3 saves bc I refuse to delete my old ones that will likely never be finished (first ever gameplays, not optimized, everytime I open one I get overwhelmed and stop), but also because I keep making new games with the specific purpose of romancing a certain companion, seeing special dialog, doing a specific style of run, or getting an achievement on steam.

[aroaessidhe]

2024 reads / storygraph

This Ravenous Fate

start of a sapphic YA duology set in 1920s Harlem, in a world where reapers (vampires) are the result of horrific human experimentation

follows a reluctant heir to a powerful reaper-hunting family, who has just returned from paris

and her childhood best friend who she hasn’t seen since she was turned and almost killed her five years ago

in the wake of a string of murders, they’re forced to work together to find out how they’re linked, and investigate rumours of a cure

[zeloinator]

13, 14, and 15 for the scar ask game for kask'ov!!

Oh I loovvvvvveeedddddd thinking about Kask'ov and scars, with her being such a weird little demon creature and immortal I really enjoyed thinking about how that would affect her scars! Thank you sooo so mcuh!!!!!!

13. did they ever come up with some absurd story about their scars?

Kask’ov wouldn’t so much as come up with, as just have the most absurd stories for her scars. The stories are always the wildest orgy you’ve ever heard described to you in detail.

14. do they have any scar caused by someone they still have a positive relationship with?

Kask’ov’s scars are mostly from Belle Ze’Bub, her beloathed Wife, and ancient unknown being~ Namely Kask’ov’s flower eye was a gift from Belle, a plant that lives off of the blood she drinks and in return keeps her alive. This came with vine and thorny scar features that recede into her hair. She also has several on her back from the kinky sex she and Belle get up to~ Though she has quite the benefit of not feeling pain since her flower friend was gifted to her~

15. do they have any scar caused by someone they consider an enemy or a rival?

All the stuff with Belle could also be here, theyre married, theyre divorced. They hate each other neither could ever leave the others side for longer than a decade. If Kask’ov is planning an elaborate murder Belle will show up to foil it, or help it, or a secret 3rd option, without a doubt everytime. And while she does suffer attacks from those she kills, her skin never keeps their marks around~ only Belle’s (and maybe a few other people if theyre special~)

Scars-Themed Headcanons~

[shootingandywarhol]

Dreaming about the universe where It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia is the same but with all women

[absolutedestinyapocalypsse]

i love how as you read more into tlt, the ninth house seems more and more normal. Like if i'm at an immoral evil government competition, and i use human fat as soap and animate skeletons to do menial labor, i'm gonna LOSE if my competition is the third house, represented by ianthe "who HASN'T eaten human flesh and fucked a corpse" tridentarius. My weird skeleton thing seems normal, suddenly. Well-adjusted, even. It's recycling. They're using resources in a sustainable way. Normal and regular and productive for a post-climate change apocalypse universe.

People go on and on about how Muir drops you into gtn hearing from the person who knows the least about whats happening, and does not hand hold the reader through the crazy shit that occurs, and that's all true. It truly is a crazy writing decision to make your first pov character come from the universe's equivalent of amish fundamentalists. But the reader is actually done a huge favor being dropped into the ninth house first, because we already understand that space is cold and what catholic nuns are, and what goths look like, and what lesbians are. Very little time is wasted in the first chunk of gtn ripping hair out of your head wondering what the fuck is going on, because for all of its strangeness, the ninth house is already the most familiar thing we're gonna get.

Because THEN we learn that this whole universe's medieval chivalry system is designed to groom people from CHILDREN to not only be exploited and used as human batteries for necromancers, but to LIKE it. to wax poetic about it. to confuse it for love, to write fucking academic papers about it! Then we learn about planet flipping, an act so horrific and violent it turns the planet's soul into a massive vengeful monster capable of killing GOD. Like what do you MEAN the animals "change"? Is this why noodle has six legs? I would MUCH prefer to wear skeleton makeup and repent forever if the alternative was to witness my family dog grow TWO EXTRA LIMBS because the planet he lived on fucking died. Suddenly, living in the asscrack of a planet where no light gets in seems like a sweet deal when the whole solar system is lit by a sun that MAKES YOU GO CRAZY. The ninth house's WORST sin, killing 200 babies to make Harrow, a waste of resources and an act so terrible it haunts Harrow for the entire span of her life, is like a BLIP compared to the death count Jod's empire. God even hears about it and he's like, no big deal! The cohort probably kills that amount of people in a DAY.

And its ALSO tragic because you realize that all of this trauma and abuse that Gideon goes through is not really because of the ninth house at all. It's really just an individual skill issue that she wasn't treated with compassion. Nobody hated her because she's jesus or a bomb, nobody even KNOWS she's a bomb. It's just Priamhark and Pelleamena being deeply guilty and scared people that motivates her treatment, and absolutely nothing else.

They did something bad, and they know it, and Gideon survived it, and they can't kill her to cover it up, and that's IT. They killed themselves for pride, because they were afraid of the consequences of their actions (both the baby killing and Harrow opening the tomb) coming back to bite them. You can argue this is the catholicism of it all, and I wouldn't say you're wrong, but compared to the cavalier system, where exploitation is in the very lining of the house's institutions, the ninth house is really removed from the space empire's blood factory. This is compared to the fourth house where they have tons of children to be CANNON FODDER to join the cohort at fucking 14, compared to the eight house uncle nephew fuckery, even the fifth house which actually does seems nice to live on but also seems to have the fourth house in some sort of fucked up political bear hug??? (maybe the fourth house has so many kids in order to fight the fifth's battles? which is EXACTLY what jod's whole empire is about; politely stirring your tea and acting nice while you destroy everything) compared to ALL OF THAT, the cruelty that Gideon faces is really more a bug of the ninth's system than a feature.

There's nothing baked into the culture and everyday life of the ninth house that necessitated that cruelty; in fact, for such a pragmatic and resource-scarce place, it's WEIRD that a strong able-bodied young person was treated like a waste of space and resources. It could just have easily not happened, if Harrow's parents had been different people. Maybe they were products of their environment, but so was Harrow, and she values Gideon's life SO MUCH that she'd literally rather carve out parts of her own brain than exploit her. Gideon grows up knowing really NOTHING about cavaliers, so remote from the horrors of the empire that she develops an idea of what the cohort is from porn magazines. And in a lot of ways, that upbringing was desolate and terrible, and in a lot of other ways it literally DID NOT HAVE TO BE.

Gideon's MAIN THING is that she wants to be useful, to be needed, to be loved and it SUCKS that she couldn't even get it in the one place where she was actually an invaluable resource, where the death empire had the weakest reach. Gideon can't even blame her lack of love on the fucked up chivalry system like everyone else can because it JUST WASNT REALLY RELEVENT!?!?! This is like if i rolled up to the trauma competition and everyone else was raised in a nuclear warzone by wolves or something and i grew up in like, the suburbs and was raised by teachers and i somehow STILL WON. truly what the fuck guys.

[ozymoron]

im fucking tired i love characters who are incompetant being chosen as the chosen ones to save humanity or whatever from some evil its so good everytime and makes me smile and laugh

[mumblingsage]

I'm personally delighted to see a renaissance of appreciation for Tales of the Flat Earth, but I do recommend keeping in mind these are books from the 1980s and are not always progressive by modern standards, or even 1980s standards (a significant example: the setting is clearly influenced by 1001 Arabian Nights but virtually all the characters are white, Death being one exception). Also, sometimes related to that point but also separately, most of the characters are complete assholes (Death again being an exception). They are FUN assholes to read about, but don't go in expecting a lot of good behavior or happy endings (there are some, which I won't spoil). Among other content that could need warning for, there are scenes of sexual coercion and assault.

Again, I deeply enjoyed reading this series, occasionally reread it, and would love to see more people enjoy it too. But I'd hate to see people unpleasantly surprised by the contents. I'd go to Lee's book expecting lush prose about clever, amoral people pursuing their schemes and goals on a mindblowing scale. Some of those amoral people happen to be genderfluid or bisexual. That's very cool, it was progressive in the 1980s and can still be progressive today, but I wouldn't want to go in this one with my hopes too high or my guard too far down.

[stealingpotatoes]

POTES SEMI-LIVEBLOGS KOTOR!

ive been writing my thoughts in the notes app but due to popular demand (one person asked for it) i'm posting my liveblogging DO NOT SAY/TAG/COMMENT SPOILERS PLEASE i read tags

warning im a yapper, im 10 hours in and theres a lot already (separated into sessions):

SESSION 1

whos this clown i thought i would be playing as revan

ive been too spoiled by dragon age origins this character creator sucks ass

only human???? ): fr?? ill just imagine her different in my brain or some shit

my life is being mansplained to me. is this bad writing or do i have amnesiacs

hes meta now??? hes talking abt the screen controls?????

omg a jedi and an evil jediii

omg their asses suckedddd they both died immediately

i <3 bringing a sword to a gun fight

WHY R THERE SO MANY SITH WHERE IS TJE RULE OF TWO

i clicked a workbench and it said lightsaber so either i get a lightsaber or i get a jedi friend whose lightsaber i can steal if im careful

I assume u play as revan in kotor2 so im gonna buy that now so i can play it when im done playing w this clown

i got light side points im getting a good grade in game morality which is something both normal to want and possible to achieve

everyone keeps saying revan is dead but thats my friend revan from tumblr hes clearly alive. or they???

my characters ass is distractingly present onscreen

huge fan of the way everyone collapsed drunk what the FUCK was in that wine

ok these sith ppl might be the bad guys but their armour is DRIPPY AS FUCK

ideologically i dont agree w the sith but they kinda went off w the fits

googling how to become a sith without being evil cause they have Drip

SESSION 2

i paid £1.19 to see revan he better show up in this game at some point

all these sith n i still cant find one revan….. stop faking ur death rn come out n talk to me babygirl this isnt like u….

why can i be light/dark side if im not a jedi. give me a laser sword

maybe this jedi gyal will know where revan is faking his death. or give me a fuckin lightsaber PLEASEEE

was just thinking 'does this game have romance' and then carth called me beautiful. i dont think im gonna romance anyone until i get this amnesia sorted

why is carth questioning me so much abt the crash im pretty sure i have amnesia

why tf did the jedi lady have me transferred to this ship are we in lesbians with each other???

carth's not wrong it is suspicious but i lowkey have amnesia so i coulda done that i coulda not

a lot of clone wars voice actors in this. was lucasfilm so broke in the 2000s that they could only afford the same 3 VAs for every project

mission is 14??????? we need to get my girl back in school

SESH 3

tale as old as time i fucking suck at racing games

ok i didnt realise you had to mash click i won

REVAN!!! REVAN!!!!!!!!!

why am i dreaming abt revan tho. real as hell but ?????

lmao cringe revan getting blown up. i thought the jedi beat rev-meister in a fight but no. accident

"such visions are often a sign of force sensitivity" COOL YAY GIVE ME A LIGHTSABER

BASTILLE LOST HER FUCKING LIGHTSABER??

CARTH IS RIGHT THATS LIKE DAY ONE JEDI SHIT. ok i still love her even tho shes a bit of a bitch and also doesnt have a saber

if we find a lightsaber im taking it first tho

whys carth getting weird abt me being weird that he doesnt trust me. i just wanna be friends mate

SESH IV: A NEW HOPE

'i mean no disrespect, but perhaps one of the male slaves could serve you better' i went in here to start a slave revolution and instead got called a lesbo

LMAO THERES A SPICE LAB???? WALTER WHITE WHERE ARE YOU

thats insaneee they blew up BILLIONS of people to get to one jedi?????? these sith arent fucking around theyre scary

UM THIS IS CRAZY GRAPHICS THE LIGHTING IS CLEARER/DARKER WHEN I COVER THE SUN W THE SHIP EDGE?? 2003 IS THE YEAR OF THE FUTURE

someone just called me padawan i kinda assumed i was in my late 20s do i just have baby vibes

all the jedi in the movies are so chill but every kotor jedi i've met so far has been a bit of a bitch

YO THEY HAVE A YODA!!! its not THE yoda but

cool so these guys are just the regional managers at best. your asses are not the council

why can everyone smell my force juju so strong

THATS STRAIGHT UP YODA'S CLONE WARS VA

why does fake yoda not blink both eyes at the same time. im calling him master tortimer he reminds me of the animal crossing mayor

bastila there was no need for such a fancy bow

malak is like evil aang

revan is so much shorter than malak omg

are me and bastila sharing dreams. are we both obsessed w revan

poor mission ):

WHAT WAS MASTER TORTIMER ABT TO SAY????????? EVER SINCE WHEN??? DID WE KNOW EACH OTHER BEFORE MY AMNESIACS????? DID BASTILA TELL U SMTHN MORE WHEN I WASNT IN THE ROOM???

im intrigued i like this whole hidden jedi shtick its very compelling. so is whatever theyre hiding from me

kinda surprising no jedi found me before tho given my force juju is so strong

IM A LEGIT JEDI NOW??? SICK!!!

does revan rlly not have pronouns i thought that was a tumblr thing but they straight up are a nonbinary icon ive never heard a single pronoun used. revan's pronouns are revan/revan's

damn revan seems so cool in these stories (charismatic war hero that convinced their troops to join them as conqueror?? julius caesar) and yet all we've seen them do onscreen is get blown up and die by accident

A YEAR AGO? the way they were talking i assumed revan died like. a week before the game started

master uh i forgot his name he has martin scorcese vibes said revan was a paragon of the jedi so what im getting is that all jedi gifted kids turn evil

even if i didnt know revan as a tumblr darling id KNOW revan has to be alive somewhere they way everyone talks abt them is too cool for a character who exploded and died. i think. i hope. I PAID £1.19 TO MEET REVAN

'only you and bastila can stop malak' seriously????? just us two?? ive been a jedi for like, 6 minutes and you guys keep calling bastila young???? do you guys not wanna help??

omg im getting carth to traumadump! <3

HE WAS ON REVAN'S ARMY>??

i totally knew the jedi code and did not have to google it whatsoever

they rlly said fuck going to illum heres a crystal from the bin

he told me id be a great sentinel and i was like i know but i want blue cause i dont wanna be matchies with bastila

OGH!!! I HAVE A LIGHTSABER!!!! THIS IS GAME OF THE YEAR!!!!

omg i made my lightsaber perfectlyyy which is rare <3 getting a good grade in jedi

maybe i was a travelling lightsaber salesman before my amnesia

seriously though WHO was i everyone's kinda stopped acting like i have amnesia since the first mission BUT IVE PLAYED DRAGON AGE THAT GIVES YOU OPPORTUNITIES TO RP UR PAST. THIS DOESNT. EITHER THIS GAME IS BAD (but i love it so its not) OR I HAVE RETROGRADE AMNESIA

also everyone keeps being like "Oh ur force juju is so strong" AND NOBODY FOUND ME TIL NOW??? suspicious. did getting a really bad concussion activate the force in me

im too confused and amnesiac'd to think abt anything except the fact i have a glowing stick now

FSESH FIVE:

big fan of using aliens to avoid having to get VAs to read every line

oh so carth's boyfriend saul betrayed him and became leader of the sith fleet so he has trust issues

well he needs to calm down. i can't betray him cause i dont know what the fuck is happening

yooo i love the design differences on the mandalorians

oh my god this lady wanted to fuck her droid cause it was her husband's. and then it killed itself. wtf. game of the year tho

wtf they jebaited this juhani person into going dark side but then i talked her out of it. that seems a bit mean of them

i hope she can join my party she looks too unique to be a random npc

ive been thinking and I might be going crazy but there was a loading screen tip ages ago that said jedis could wipe ppl's mind and all i thought at the time was 'fuck the shitshow acolyte didnt make that up'. but what if one of them wiped MY memory and i used to be a jedi or smthn ????????

cause they keep being like ur weirdly good at this??? did bastila steal my memories??????????

I KNOW I HAVE AMNESIA!! EVEN IF EVERYONE DOESN'T BRING IT UP BC THEYRE PROBABLY TRYING TO SAVE MY FEELINGS

if i dont have amnesia and im just deeping the fact the opening had my life being mansplained then im gonna look real stupid

anyway time 2 go to the fuckshit ruins cave where r-dog and malak went to

"it must be referring to revan. the dark lord and malak--" revan's pronouns are revan/thedarklord

bastila said theres no mention of the Builders in the archives. does she just know every text off by heart

THIS DROID IS 20K YEARS OLD ???

omg i can equip 2 lightsabers at once. game of the year

OK I TAKE BACK EVERYTHING I SAID ABOUT THE AMNESIA BASTILA IS ASKING ME QUESTIONS ABOUT MY BACKGROUND THAT I CAN ANSWER. I REPEAT I DO NOT HAVE AMNESIA

ok i didnt get choices and i didnt really uh… say anything that i didnt already get told im still not ruling out amnesia

also booo i didnt get to find out how old i was

master tortimer rlly looks like the ultimate ketamine yoda

LMAO THERE WAS A DIALOGUE OPTION 2 CALL JUHANI A CATGIRL

omg kashyyk from jedi fallen order!!!

I CAN UPGRADE MY LIGHTSABER THIS IS JUST LIKE JFO

omg this ship is fun i wish everyone had personalised bunk spaces like hfw… a game which came out 19 years after this i should probably just take what we have

im gonna start w manaan cause im p sure thats what B-dog said n its the same language the droid was speakin

omg hyperspace from star wars

THE GUY THE BUILDING FELL ON???

am i having dreams abt revan bc bastila killed revan and im connected to her this is so roundabout

maybe i'd sleep better if my ponytail wasnt clipping into the pillow

[kiwi accent] six

carth needs a xanax every time i think we're friends he stops trusting me

also lmao he actually pointed out how wild it was that a day one padawan is being sent on this uber important mission and HES RIGHT IT IS WEIRD!! i thought it was main character logic but he's calling it out

i really really like the sense of unease that's setting in like at first i thought it was just cause im not used to 2003 games but no this is on purpose bc carth my friend carth keeps calling it out

THERE IS A CHILD ON MY SHIP ??????????????????

lmao the representative for menaan is roland wann. its like poetry it rhymes

there are no cameras in the sith hangar <3 rookie error i can commit crimes now

bastila's favourite hobby is getting shot and walking into my grenades

this isnt a combat system this is a missing system

I GOT ARRESTED???? IM JUST A GIRL

nvm i had a datapad that said the sith were evil so theyve let me go free and we're besties

why do i feel like ive just walked into an underwater horror mission

this suit waddles at the speed of a penguin on fentanyl

i tamed the beastie this is like how to train your dragon

MALAK FIRED ON REVAN?????? WERENT THEY BEST FRIENDS???????

but maybe revan escaped when bastila wasnt looking THEYRE FINE THEYRE OUT THERE SOMEWHERE. I BELIEVE

so hopefully when we run into revan they'll be like agh i changed my ways cause of the being shot thing and they'll be my bestie

great news i successfully communicated w the ship child and gave her back to dantooine. my girl has shockingly good linguisitics skills

bastila is so dour "oh watch out for the dark side" GIRL I AM. I NEED TO GET THE BEST GRADE IN GAME MORALITY

ok OFF TO KASHYYK i hope cal kestis is there… thru the force i guess… bc he wont be born for another 4000 years but its whatever

omg you'll never guess what. another vision. wow its one of the thangs. cool this is a tomorrow me problem

[coraniaid]

I know that the idea that Amy Madison is secretly in love with Willow is not canon.

I know the show only really embraces the witches-as-lesbians metaphor in Season 4 (almost a year after Amy's last pre-rat appearance). I know it also largely drops that metaphor (in favour of the unfortunate "magic is a bad, addictive drug" subplot) at pretty much the exact time Amy returns to the show. I know we're not supposed to read anything into the fact Amy was the first girl Willow ever did magic with, or that Amy is introduced to us as Willow's childhood friend, or that The Wish establishes that Willow and Amy hang out off-screen without Buffy, or that every one of the high school episodes Amy appears in starts with her entering the scene with Willow or saying hello to Willow before anyone else.

I know it's just a coincidence that Xander discovers Amy is a witch and threatens to blackmail her over this secret (in her very second episode on the show) just one episode after he discovers Larry is gay which makes Larry assume he was threatening to blackmail him over this secret (in Larry's very second episode on the show). I know we're not supposed to ask why, still in her second appearance on the show, when she's been a practicing witch for at most a bit under a year, and probably much less time, Amy is already able to complain to Xander how difficult it is to make a spell that will "make somebody love you for all eternity", or why she knows that "intent has to be pure with love spells" or who she might be thinking about when she says "if you don't want to be with her forever, then what's the point?".

I know we're probably meant to take Amy's claim (in Season 6's Smashed) that she was hoping Larry would ask her to the Prom literally, and just ignore -- as I suspect the writers did -- the fact that Larry is very heavily implied to have come out months before Amy turned herself into a rat (he was talking about coming out even before her second appearance on the show!). We're not meant to think Amy might have some reason to lie to Willow about this.

I know we're meant to see Season 6 Amy as the evil magical junkie who introduces Willow to her dealer (and just not think about exactly when Amy is meant to have first met Rack). I know we're meant to assume Amy only spends time with Willow in order to take advantage of her, and ignore the fact that Willow turns Amy back to a human and starts going out dancing with her mere days (possibly the day after!) being broken up with by her girlfriend. And that she does this immediately after promising Amy the Rat that she'll find her "a nice companion" who she can "love and play with".

I know that, unlike me, the show fundamentally does not care about Amy as a character at all.

But what I keep forgetting is that "Amy is secretly in love with Willow" is not even a particularly popular bit of fanon. As far as I can tell, most people seem to prefer the default canon interpretation, which is ... uh. Amy is just some random girl who shows up with a new hairstyle and backstory and personality every season or so, as and when the plot requires, spends a few years living as a pet in Willow's dorm room but quickly gets over it, and who doesn't particularly want or mean or represent anything else.

Surely after twenty years we can do better?