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autumnblogs · 4 years ago

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Day 14: The Ultimate Reward

https://homestuck.com/story/2404

Movies are one of the main vectors that culture uses to transmit itself in the modern day, and if it sounds like I’m describing this form of cultural reproduction like a virus, you’re not wrong. The concept of the viral video has been around for about 15 years, if memory serves, and Homestuck’s self-referential format closely recalls the snowclone and advice animal type memes of the late thousands. Meme itself is a word coined by Richard Dawkins to describe the basic unit of cultural reproduction and transmission. While the lines related to memes from Metal Gear Solid have become memes themselves,

John and Karkat’s lives are both shaped by memes, transmitted to them through movies. John’s ideas about romance and family are shaped by his movies, Karkat and his ideas about romance and family are shaped by his movies.

https://homestuck.com/story/2406

The narration insists that Feferi and Eridan are made for each other, but their romance almost immediately disintegrates. The narrative is training us to be skeptical of the Troll’s preoccupation with Romantic Destiny. The idea that you have one soulmate, a person you were just destined for who it’ll work out with, is bogus.

https://homestuck.com/story/2435

Something about this sequence has inspired me to talk about Society with a capital S. Both Hobbes’ Leviathan and Ginsberg’s Howl talk about Society with a capital S - the indistinct entity, the system which arises seemingly unbidden from the gestalt of myriad human interactions, parables about social systems.

Leviathan is a founding myth for the social contract and liberalism in general. As one of the petite bourgeoisie who benefits from Liberalism, it is of course in Hobbes’ interest to defend its existence and provide justification for the material conditions he benefits from, but Howl is considerably less charitable. Referring to the same entity as Moloch, Ginsberg describes it as an incommensurable monster, consuming the lives of the men and women who make it up to further its own agenda.

Authoritarians have always used the threat of cultural extinction in order to justify unjust material conditions and social hierarchies. Fail to fall in line, and Western Civilization is doomed. Glub Glub (who I refuse to call anything else, Feferi’s Lusus, you know who I mean) is the physical manifestation of this threat, an unbearable burden foisted upon troll society by their overlord, Lord English, to force them to participate in a system that guarantees their inability to produce ethical behavior. Their choice has always been a choice between murder and extinction.

https://homestuck.com/story/2439

Eridan is fascinating to me. I don’t know if he predicted the Incel movement, or was merely an agglomeration of school shooter, neo-fascist stereotypes, but boy is he absolutely spot-on - the fascination with military history, the emotional theatrics, the possessive and entitled attitude toward the women in his life.

https://homestuck.com/story/2441

Feferi’s a sweet girl, but she’s still one of the people who benefits from Alternian Society. The problem has never been that the Condesce is a brutal evil woman, the problem is the way that Alternian Society is structured in the first place. I’ll have more to say about this whenever we get to Openbound, since Feferi’s rule is discussed more there, and I’ll definitely have more to say about it when I eventually write the companion piece that I intend to about Hierarchy, Patriarchy, and so on and so forth. That one might be a long time coming though, because a lot of Homestuck is devoted to examining it, and I think it might end up being my longest essay. It’s the theme I think is the most directly applicable to real life, hence the import.

Feferi’s caretaking attitude and controlling predilections are also juxtaposed with Jade’s in the same way that Kanaya’s maternal instinct and green thumb are juxtaposed with Jade’s. Could it be that as the Witch of Space, Jade Harley is the ultimate mom?

https://homestuck.com/story/2448

Man, as long as I’m comparing Eridan to neo-fascists and Feferi to the political establishment, this relationship between the two of them - the way that Feferi views her enabling of Eridan as actually curtailing his worst excesses - really smacks of the kind of unity and compromise rhetoric that liberals always seem to spout in order to justify their decision to adopt moderate right-wing policy instead of actual left-wing policy.

I’m probably reaching here, but the thought popped into my head unbidden, and I’m trying to keep this liveblog as stream of consciousness as possible.

https://homestuck.com/story/2458

People think about us way less than we think about ourselves.

https://homestuck.com/story/2467

Just as I’m not here to defend Eridan (he’s a piece of shit who knows what he did), I’m not here to attack Feferi, or to excuse her. Characters in Homestuck are frequently both abusers and victims.

Feferi’s relationship with Eridan is complicated. For starters, she isn’t really curtailing the worst of his excesses, not the way that she thinks he is. Feferi has authority, one way or the other, and by being emotionally available to Eridan, she has enabled him more than she has prevented him from doing wrong. Cutting him out of her life earlier could have sent a clear message to Eridan that his genocidal ideation is not okay, but instead, she has afforded the luxury of her presence.

The aforementioned preoccupation with Romantic Destiny probably made it so much easier for her to wait, too. As the Heiress, Feferi enjoys all the benefits of being in troll society while having to put up with almost none of the downsides. The suffering of other people - the extra pointless emotional turmoil she puts Eridan through by stringing him along, the suffering of the trolls whose lusii she has employed him to murder - their suffering is all theoretical to her. It’s not something she’s ever had to encounter herself (something she shares in common with Jane - if I remember correctly, Andrew’s commentary suggests that he picked up some of the ideas he was originally exploring with Feferi to explore with Jane).

(Some of these ideas are from a conversation with @bladekindeyewear with whom I was having a conversation on Discord while I was writing this).

https://homestuck.com/story/2475

Instead of indulging Eridan’s emotional theatrics (he continues to make other people’s suffering about himself, via his pretension of nobility) I want to call attention to the fact that, as a chemical coping mechanism, Homestuck compares Trolls’ use of Soda to humans’ use of alcohol.

I don’t know if sugary beverages have a similarly potent physiological effect on trolls as alcohol has on humans, and it doesn’t matter if it does - the parallel is being drawn nevertheless. I’m only making this point, because later on it will become important: Terezi and Rose’s respective addictions (Rose’s alcoholism and Terezi’s... sodaholism?) directly mirror each other.

https://homestuck.com/story/2516

The fact that Vriska’s narration here describes these sidequests as pointless is, I think, another clue into Vriska’s overall character. By all accounts, she and Tavros actually seem to be having a blast together. She’s not going for the gold, she’s not skipping right to the end, the two of them are just screwing around in her magical land, going on adventures. Okay, she is literally going for the gold in the sense of treasure hunting, but in a more figurative sense, the Vriska we’re more familiar with would probably be a taskmaster, using the scourge of her overbearing personality to drive the team forward to victory over the main final boss. Instead, she’s most in her element here when she’s not doing anything remotely important at all, just hanging out with someone she likes(hates? Troll friendships are complicated.)

Abusive relationships are rarely as obvious or simple as one person harassing and berating the other all the time. Tavros is clearly having a blast here too, and throughout this whole sequence.

https://homestuck.com/story/2521

The problem is that there are two Vriskas (at least), the Vriska who lives inside of her, who she’s only comfortable bringing out around people who have no expectations for her, and the Vriska that Scratch, and Spidermom, and Sn0wman are egging her on to be, the Ideal Troll who cuts through the bullshit, cuts to the chase, and becomes the most important person in the universe. Later on, they will be literally bifurcated by John’s retcon shenanigans.

Homestuck uses the language of alternate selves and ultimate selves to discuss a question that is applicable to real life as well. “Who is the definitive version of a character for whom different choices and versions of themselves are possible?” And when applied to real life, the question becomes something more like, “Could I have chosen to do something else instead of the thing that I did? Are my intentions important, or only my actions?” I don’t think it answers clearly, but just getting us to think about it might be sufficient.

https://homestuck.com/story/2531

The Black Queen is just one of the many malign influences in Terezi and Vriska’s lives, and while she’s not literally an abusive parent to both of them, by egging them on to indulge their worst excesses (Egging Terezi on to persecute people pre-emptively or overzealously, egging Vriska on to take away other people’s agencies), it’s safe to say that her voice is just one of many doing the same thing for the two of them.

https://homestuck.com/story/2543

Oh man. The memoes are some of my favorite conversations in all of Homestuck. They’re funny, but with the exception of one or two of them, I’m not sure how much useful info we’ll get out of them.

https://homestuck.com/story/2567

https://homestuck.com/story/2575

Karkat and Terezi may not have literally had sex, but whatever their secret encounter was is effectively symbolic of a consummation of their relationship. She knows what color Karkat’s blood is. They have been in a pail together.

The two of them can hardly be more intimate with each other.

Too bad it doesn’t work out.

But then, it’s probably for the best - the fact that it doesn’t work out for the two of them is the retrospect we need to be able to say it was never going to work out for the two of them.

https://homestuck.com/story/2576

Something different does it for everyone.

https://homestuck.com/story/2578

What does it for Vriska is having the shit beaten out of her by Aradia.

What is Vriska’s big takeaway from this beatdown?

Maybe if we continue to read Aradia as being Vriska’s doppelganger, being savagely beaten by one of her own victims, and one who is so like her in terms of her feelings of helplessness, her feelings of being at the whim of a cosmos that is out to get her, Vriska realizes that the thing she lashes out to attack in other people - the weakness loathed by troll society - is what she hates and fears the most in herself.

https://homestuck.com/story/2587

Aradia is starting to lose her tolerance for scenarios that involve being manipulated by those very same actors that are making her feel helpless.

https://homestuck.com/story/2593

Aradia interprets Sburb as being a challenge to come between any prospective gods and the ultimate reward. Perhaps that is the case. Assigning intent to Sburb to me seems possibly flawed, since it is, after all, only the reproductive organ of a universe. But perhaps it does have some intentions of its own. Are those intentions uniquely Sburb’s? Perhaps specifically Skaia’s. Maybe they are even, more generally, the intentions of Paradox Space itself. But Sburb itself seems more ambivalent to its players than anything. The vast majority of sessions, it seems, kill their players outright, or at least produce null sessions that never give rise to universal reproduction.

https://homestuck.com/story/2625

And that is where we shall conclude for this evening.

Cam signing off, Alive and Not Alone.

#liveblogging #commentary #politics #hierarchy

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unfolded73 · 4 years ago

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love this director's cut idea! ⭐for any section you want to talk about!

I decided to do a director’s commentary on “The Things We Don’t Speak Aloud” because I have a lot of thoughts about Marcy and Clint Brewer. Below the cut for length:

Ask me for a director’s commentary of one of my fics or a section of a fic

Marcy looked around at the motel room she’d just stepped into while Clint muscled his suitcase over the threshold and closed the door. The decorations were… unique, that was probably the kindest thing she could say about them. Hopelessly out of date to be sure, but perhaps people liked the kitsch, she thought charitably. Perhaps that was why nothing appeared to have been updated in decades. She lifted her small suitcase onto the bed and went to unzip it, her mind already focusing on how she wanted to arrange her things in the drawers.

“Are we going to talk about what just happened?” Clint asked, making no similar moves toward unpacking.

She felt a spike of anxiety go through her, making her palms sweat. “Clint, until we know for sure what they were talking about, I don’t know if it’s fair to—”

So I super identify with the Brewer family and their apparent willingness to avoid difficult subjects. I was raised the same way, unfortunately. It was an open secret that my uncle was gay, and despite supporting him (somewhat; my mom’s attitudes on homosexuality were ok but not great), my mother never spoke to him about it. Ever. For 50 years. So I understand how Patrick could go more than a year without telling his parents about being gay / about David. And I figure he probably learned that avoidance from his parents.

“It seemed pretty clear what they were talking about, Marcy,” Clint said. “He literally said, ‘a business relationship and a romantic relationship.’ What else could he have meant?”

She dropped the sweater she’d been refolding and met her husband’s eyes. “So Patrick and… and David…”

“I guess so.”

“But if they’re a couple, why wouldn’t Patrick say anything? We aren’t homophobic.” She picked up the sweater again. “Maybe David’s father is confused. Or jumping to conclusions because they spend a lot of time together working at the store.”

Clint squinted at her. “He lives here and probably sees his son all the time. I don’t think he would have said it that way if they weren’t a couple.”

“But Patrick dated Rachel for years!” She paused, thinking it through while she went over and put the sweater in one of the dresser drawers. “I guess he could be bisexual.”

Bisexual erasure, particularly for men, is real. I think about it a lot more now that my own son identifies as bi. So I struggle when I write scenes like this because, on the one hand, no, Patrick doesn’t seem to be bi. We can assume that since David says he’s gay in MTP, that’s probably how Patrick himself identifies, and it’s consistent with him saying he didn’t know before David what right was supposed to feel like. But he could be bi/pan, as far as his parents know at this point, and I don’t want it to seem like I as the author wouldn’t consider that if I had only the info the Brewers have. But also, I figure the Brewers would assume he was gay because that seems more in-line with who they are. And it happens to be true. So I did give Marcy the thought here that, ok, maybe he’s bi. And then had Clint say, maybe, but also he did break up with Rachel a lot and run away. I wrote it similarly in My Heartbeat Shows the Fear.

“That’s possible. Or it’s possible that he was trying very hard not to be gay, and that’s why ultimately things didn’t work out with Rachel. It would explain a lot. They way they kept breaking up. The way he ran away to start a new life somewhere else.” He sat down on the bed.

Marcy shook her head, a hand coming up to her mouth to hold in… she didn’t know what. “No, that’s… surely he would have talked to us if he was feeling that way. And he was happy with Rachel for a long time.”

“Was he?”

Marcy began unpacking more quickly, needing to accomplish a task, needing to move. “Yes, of course he was happy.”

“Not happy enough, though. Maybe he’s happier with David.”

She slumped her shoulders, suddenly exhausted. They’d gotten up before dawn to make this drive and the long hours on the road were taking their toll. “Should we maybe take a nap?”

Marcy does not want to talk about this anymore. Using sleep to avoid things is another thing I do.

Her husband nodded, recognizing the request for what it was — a plea not to talk about this anymore. “Good idea. I don’t think I’m going to be able to stay awake for a party if I don’t have a little rest.”

She put her suitcase aside and took off her shoes and stretched out next to her husband on top of the bedspread. Clint reached out for her hand, and she squeezed his fingers in return.

Marcy thought about the conversations she’d had with David on the phone. The way he talked about the store and the way he talked about Patrick. The way he talked about how smart Patrick was about the business. It hadn’t escaped her notice the way David spoke — the cadence and timbre of his voice, the uptilt of it on certain phrases, his encyclopedic knowledge of skin care products — yes, she’d assumed David was gay when she bothered to think about it at all. She’d mostly just thought that David seemed nice, based on his unfailing politeness with her.

Another tough one, because David isn’t gay, he’s pan. But most people probably assume he’s gay, based on stereotypes, and I figured Marcy would too.

Meanwhile, she’d gotten used to a certain amount of distance from her son. He’d barely spoken to them at all for the first couple of months after he left town, other than to say he was safe and that he needed a fresh start. Then came news of the business he was starting with David, and Patrick had begun to sound excited on the phone, talking about David’s vision for the store. He’d had a lot to say about what a good idea it was that David had, and how skilled he was with vendors and customers. She began to sift her memory of those glowing compliments through this new filter, where maybe her son had romantic feelings for his business partner. It made a certain kind of sense, now that she thought about it. It explained why any mention of Rachel caused him to shut down.

I do like imagining Patrick being unable to keep from bringing the topic of David up, even though he couldn’t bring himself to say they were a couple. Maybe hoping his parents guessed.

It perhaps explained, she realized with a sick feeling in her stomach, why any time she asked if he was dating anyone, he denied it and quickly changed the subject.

She didn’t think she’d be able to sleep, but Marcy did doze off briefly. She awoke after about a half hour to Clint puttering around with the tea kettle. Sitting up, she put her feet on the floor, her stomach still queasy with anxiety.

“So why didn’t he want to tell us?”

“Maybe… maybe they aren’t telling other people at all?” Clint posited.

“Mr. Rose knows. That weird Roland person knows. Both of them assumed we knew!” Then it hit her. “David assumed we knew. Right? If they’re out to people here, and he invited us to Patrick’s party…” She thought again about how warm David always was with her on the phone, taking time out of his day to ask after her health or make small talk with her when she called the store. The way he spoke about Patrick, which she never questioned because of course they knew each other well — they ran a business together. “What do we do now?”

Clint’s eyes widened. “I have no idea.”

There was a knock on the door.

Marcy went over and opened it, revealing Johnny Rose’s worried face and expressive eyebrows on the other side.

“Hi, Marcy. Mind if I come in to chat?”

“Johnny… yes, of course,” she said, widening the opening to admit him.

So this was the seed idea of this fic. In canon, David gets there first and Johnny shortly thereafter. I thought it would be interesting to switch it and see what happened.

He clasped his hands together, eyes darting around the room. “I wanted to apologize to you both for speaking out of turn earlier. And saying… things that I assumed you… but it seems I was, er, that is, that I jumped to conclusions about…”

I enjoy writing Johnny when he’s flustered.

Marcy tried to rescue him. “You assumed we knew that Patrick and David are dating.”

Johnny cleared his throat. “Yes. And I just wanted to say, as a parent myself, that the important thing is that they’re happy. That’s all that matters. Who our kids love doesn’t matter.”

I figured he’d say essentially the same thing he did in canon here. That the important thing was that their kids were happy.

“Johnny, we don’t have a problem with Patrick being gay.” She looked over at Clint, who shook his head.

“No,” he said in agreement.

Johnny’s whole demeanor changed, his shoulders dropping as he smiled with relief. “Oh! Good, that’s good!”

They all smiled at each other for a second, unsure what to say next.

“Yes, anyway, we love Patrick,” Johnny said, rocking on his heels. “I probably should have said earlier, I was only skeptical about him and David at first. It’s been obvious for a while that they’re good for each other. Patrick’s become like a member of the family.”

I wish we had gotten to see Johnny’s skepticism about juggling a romantic and a business relationship on the show. That does seem in-character for him, and I would have liked to have seen him trying to talk to David about it, about guarding his heart and his parts and his business. I’m sure it would have been a disaster of a conversation but I would have enjoyed it.

“How, um, how long have they been together?” Marcy asked.

“Since not long after the store opened, as I recall.” Johnny said.

Heart pounding, Marcy dropped onto the bed next to where her husband was sitting. “Oh.”

“That’s a long time,” Clint said.

Johnny’s face fell as he probably realized that he’d once again delivered cataclysmic news to Patrick’s parents. It wasn’t just that he’d kept his sexual identity and his relationship with David a secret. He’d kept it a secret for over a year.

Ugh, the timeline. In 5x14, David says “two years ago”. But there seems to have only been one Christmas since they started dating. So I just figure David was severely rounding up when he said 2 years and that it’s really been more like a year and a half at that point, idk. Jeremy Bearimy.

“You know, it can be a hard thing for kids to talk about with their parents,” Johnny said. “Goodness knows David and I haven’t always talked about what was going on in his life.”

Marcy latched onto that. Perhaps she had an expert here, someone who’d been through what they were going through. “Was it hard for David to come out to you and your wife?”

Johnny pulled over one of the chairs and sat down. “Well, it was different with David. Moira assumed he was gay from a fairly young age.” He threw up his hands. “I wasn’t sure, myself, but I figured he’d tell us when he was ready. Then when he was eighteen, he told us he was bisexual. Then later, he amended it to ‘pansexual’.” Marcy looked at Clint and saw that he looked just as confused as she felt. “The labels can be confusing,” Johnny continued, “and I know I said some things I shouldn’t have, at first. Asked him if it wouldn’t be easier if he picked a gender. Which I realize wasn’t… helpful. Or fair of me. I just wanted him to be happy. And he is now! So.” He shrugged, laughing awkwardly.

I tend to just go with the fanon that when David came out as pansexual to his parents, it was probably a surprise to them that he wasn’t gay.

“But you always knew he wasn’t… straight,” Marcy said, disappointed that the Roses’ experience didn’t really mirror theirs that closely after all.

“Yes, I suppose we did know that. Moira knew, at least. She’s always understood David better than… anyway.” A shadow flitted across his face that looked a lot like guilt. “But I’m not sure it matters when we know. It only matters that we support our kids.”

It’s also fanon that Moira was quicker to support David than Johnny was, but that’s based on the pretty solid evidence of her very firm “It’s not a phase” to Johnny in S1. Not that I think Johnny ever rejected David outright, but he clearly has struggled with David’s identity on some level, based on his convo with Roland in S1.

Marcy nodded. “We do support him, of course we do. Of course we do,” she repeated, a lump rising in her throat. She felt Clint’s hand take hers, and she was afraid to look at him lest she start to cry in earnest.

“The thought that he didn’t think he could talk to us about this,” Clint said.

“When David’s obviously so important to him,” Marcy added.

Johnny looked at them with sympathy, and clearly with no idea what to say.

The shape of their failure as parents was starting to coalesce in her mind. The fact that while they’d never said anything bad about gay people in Patrick’s presence, they’d probably never said anything good either. The fact that ‘girlfriend’ and ‘wife’ were always the words they used when talking to young Patrick about what might happen when he grew up. The way she’d always encouraged him to try to patch things up with Rachel.

So here’s where I struggle with the concept of the Brewers as these lovely, accepting parents, because while I suspect that by 201(whatever year this is in the show), their feelings about queer people are positive, I don’t think they were necessarily that way when Patrick was growing up. I raised my kids with no particular expectations as to the gender of people they might want to date, and I doubt the Brewers were like that. I also think (and I used my own mother as a model for this) that when they talked about tolerance of gay people, it was with an air of “well, it’s not a choice, they can’t help it, so we need to love them.” The thing that communicated to me as a kid was that being gay was gross and icky and on some level, bad. But I’m sure if you’d have asked my mom, she would have patted herself on the back for her acceptance and “tolerance.” But people evolve, and gay marriage has been around now for long enough (especially in Canada) that a lot of minds have changed, and I count the Brewers among that number. They stepped up when they had to, and they were beaming and proud at the wedding. They also could have done things differently and perhaps made Patrick’s journey easier. But then he wouldn’t be with David, so.

“Is Patrick happy?” she asked Johnny, embarrassed that she didn’t know and that this near-stranger likely did. But she had to ask. She was desperate to know.

Johnny hesitated, perhaps realizing what a complicated question that was to ask about anyone. “He certainly seems happy. But you can ask him yourself tonight, right?”

There was another knock at the door.

Marcy opened it to a tall man with dark hair and Johnny Rose’s expressive eyebrows. He was clutching a gift basket to his chest and looking apprehensive. It could only be one person. “David?” she asked.

“Mrs. Brewer, Mr. Brewer, hi. I’m—”

“David!” his father said, standing. “Come on in. The Brewers and I were just having a nice chat.”

David looked even more apprehensive at that as he shuffled into the room, eyeing his father with suspicion. “Why?”

Marcy took the gift basket from David, letting his hurried explanation about its contents drift by without paying it any attention. “David?” She still felt like she was on the verge of tears, even more so now that she was faced with the man that her son had apparently fallen in love with. “Can I give you a hug?”

#fic commentary #fishyspots #ask box game

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apprenticebard · 7 years ago

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To respond to your post since you were one of the few people who disagreed with me with respect in the convo: The fact that you're one of the few is most of the problem. Most of your community othered and demonized me. This is the same othering and demonizing that most conservatives do to liberals and victims. I literally can't, as in "violates laws of physics" can't, try to find common ground/work with people who are busy making up things I never said and treating me as a demon enemy. (1/2)

Hello again, friend! I didn’t receive a second part to this message, so I’m just going to respond to this part.

One thing I have learned in my time on the internet is that it is really, really easy to miscommunicate or accidentally hurt someone, so I’m going to take this point by point. The intent here isn’t to tear apart what you’re saying, it’s to make sure I’m responding to things you actually said, since I have a natural tendency to over-interpret and accidentally make assumptions about people (which is, as you can imagine, really bad for honest and respectful communication). I’ll do my best, but please let me know if I make a mistake, OK?

“To respond to your post since you were one of the few people who disagreed with me with respect in the convo:”

I’m going to try not to say anything against any of the individual the people who conversed with you; it feels rude to publicly discuss their behavior with you without involving them in the conversation. I did notice that several people talked about you in the third person, analyzing your behavior as though you weren’t there. I want to avoid hurting anyone else by behaving similarly towards them.

“The fact that you’re one of the few is most of the problem. Most of your community othered and demonized me.”

I’m not 100% sure what specific community I’m being assigned to here, but I’m going to put that thought on hold for the moment.

Aside from that, I’d like to point out that I’m one of the few people in this conversation who has not yet been directly criticized by anyone. For the moment, I’d like to avoid getting into the question of whether the criticism aimed at other people was justified, because going through everything that was said sounds exhausting. For now, let’s just stick to the fact that I haven’t received any yet. OK?

Like many other people I’ve met, I have a hard time responding gracefully to criticism, especially if it’s criticism of my moral character. Thinking that someone else thinks I’m evil makes it really hard for me to respond calmly, kindly, or in a way that addresses what was actually said. I think maybe I’m not alone in this; it seems like other people also have a hard time being their best selves when they’re on the receiving end of criticism, especially criticism harsh enough to be described as “demonizing”. So when Scott was criticized, he might have been hurt, and that might have made it harder for him to respond calmly and kindly. And when you were criticized, it might have (understandably!) made it harder for you to respond calmly and kindly in return. And if you’re both on the defensive, and both feel like you’re being insulted, it sounds like it’s going to be very hard for any substantive communication to take place. You would both feel like the other person was trying to unjustly drag your name through the mud, and you’d both feel like your legitimate concerns were being ignored. But I haven’t been criticized, so it’s a lot easier for me to respond calmly and kindly, and therefore I don’t know that it’s entirely fair to compare my behavior to that of the other people involved.

(That’s what this situation looks like, to me, but I’m obviously no more objective than anyone else. If that assessment doesn’t match your understanding of what’s happening, then I would ask you to explain to me what you feel is happening, so I can get a more accurate picture.)

I worry that when we ascribe beliefs and harms to communities, rather than to individual people, then this situation can occur even when nobody involved has ever personally hurt or insulted any of the other people in the conversation. We can end up in a situation where we think other people are totally unreasonable, incapable of ever giving anything or ever solving any problems, and that therefore all communication with them is pointless, purely because of what group we assign them to. And when they make the same assumptions about us, obviously no substantive communication is likely to occur.

But I don’t think it has to be this way. Right now, I’m making a conscious attempt to be as charitable, understanding, and friendly as I can. I’m doing this because I think it’s an essential part of establishing good faith, so that the two of us can have a conversation. I want to hear what you have to say! I want to learn from you about how we might make the world a better place! But unless I can convince you that I genuinely want those things, then it’s unlikely that you’ll explain your points to me in a way that I can usefully respond to. So I’m trying to modify my tone. I’m trying to slow down and remind myself not to make assumptions. I’m trying to include explicit invitations for you to disagree or correct me, so that you (I hope!) will be able to have confidence that my intention is to hear your points and respectfully communicate my own. If anything I do conflicts with those goals, then I’m asking you to let me know, so that I can take more steps to make that communication easier for both of us.

I believe that if I treat people with respect, then most people will eventually respond in kind. I believe most of those people will believe some of what I believe, or will at least have interests that are not totally incompatible with my goals, and that we will therefore be able to work together in some limited manner. But that won’t happen unless I understand them, and I won’t understand them unless I can establish good-faith communication, which requires me to be respectful and charitable even when I’m not sure the other person respects me very much.

This is basically my impression of what Scott was saying in his post, which is why I appreciated it.

“This is the same othering and demonizing that most conservatives do to liberals and victims.”

I’m really uncomfortable with the idea that someone can’t be both a conservative and a victim. “Victim” is a very broad term, encompassing almost everyone who has suffered significant harm at some point. I hope we can agree that self-identified conservatives are not immune to suffering harm. (Let me know if you’re using the term differently, or if you don’t think “conservatives can also be victims” is a safe premise.)

As someone who doesn’t necessarily identify as either a liberal or a conservative (though I do think I lean conservative compared to the rest of tumblr), I’d like to say that I see a lot of demonizing from both sides. A lot of my (very nice and very considerate!) liberal friends sometimes reblog things that say that people with my beliefs are necessarily evil, hateful, etc. Take minimum wage, for one example. I don’t believe in a higher minimum wage; I think we should switch to UBI and then abolish the minimum wage entirely. This is due to a complex web of beliefs that are, in my mind, motivated by compassion for poor people, particularly poor people currently living outside the developed world. When my friends reblog things saying that my beliefs mean that I hate poor people, it hurts a little, but I try to remind myself that they’re not talking about me specifically, and that even if they were, they’re (mostly) motivated by compassion, and they are (mostly) kind to individual people. I can therefore probably find common ground with them, despite their stated belief that everyone in a group that I belong to is evil.

Obviously some conservatives do exactly the same thing. I think we’re both aware of that, so I won’t bother going into it further, unless you think further analysis of this point is important.

“I literally can’t, as in "violates laws of physics” can’t, try to find common ground/work with people who are busy making up things I never said and treating me as a demon enemy.“

It is admittedly really hard to communicate with people who seem bent on misinterpreting everything you say. Sometimes it’s not possible. You can’t utilize teamwork unless the other person is willing to act as a team under certain circumstances. Sometimes the only thing you can do is try to protect yourself, which usually means removing yourself from the other person.

But the point of a lot of what I’ve said above is that I don’t think it’s usually impossible to find common ground with people, even if they initially appear relatively hostile. Even if someone thinks of me as an adversary, I still want to support them in their efforts to do good in the world. The hope is that by doing this, they’ll eventually decide that I am not an adversary, will reclassify me as someone who can potentially be helpful to them, and will then be more willing to listen to me in return. It’s hard—communication is always hard, especially when the people involved have different unspoken beliefs and assumptions about the world. But I think that it is possible to rise to the challenge, and I think that if I try, then more often than not, I’ll eventually be able to find some axis on which my goals and those of the other person are aligned. (And even if I don’t, as long as they’re continuing to explain things, I at least have the chance to gain a better understanding of them and their worldview.)

I’m still practicing this skill, obviously, but I do think that it has strategic promise.

Again, I hope things get better for you soon, and I hope you’ll correct me if I’ve misinterpreted you or said anything that strikes you as either rude or false.

#asks #jeyseic #long post #bard says things #if any of this sounds mean then the meanness is accidental and you should alert me so I can address it

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webpostingpro-blog · 8 years ago

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New Post has been published on Webpostingpro

New Post has been published on https://webpostingpro.com/nba-playoffs-truest-test-of-champions-in-major-north-american-sports/

NBA playoffs truest test of champions in major North American sports

BRreaking information: The Bulls may not win the NBA championship.

In the event that they do, they will smash the history book. No eighth seed ever has captured the Lawrence O’Brien trophy. In reality, for the reason that NBA accelerated the playoffs to sixteen groups in 1984, No. 1 seeds are sixty one-five towards No. 8 seeds inside the first-round collection.

Since 2003, while the NBA extended the primary spherical from high-quality-of-5 to pleasant-of-seven, best 3 No. 8 seeds have advanced. That blanketed, of a route, the 2012 76ers while Derrick Rose’s left ACL betrayed him and Joakim Noah additionally went down with a severe ankle sprain.

And this lack of upsets is a superb thing.

The only-and-completed drama of the NCAA match is notable for reminiscences. Move again and watch Jim Valvano going for walks around looking for anyone to hug after North Carolina State stunned Houston’s Phi Slamma Jamma or David slaying, Goliath, while Villanova disillusioned Patrick Ewing’s Georgetown group. They have been higher groups for a night.

Think Villanova may want to shoot seventy eight.6 percent three more instances? Over the path of a seven-game collection, “ball don’t lie.” And the fine crew wins.

The NBA playoffs are the purest form of competition from the 4 primary North American sports activities. No warm goalie standing on his head can steal more than one 1-zero victories en path to Lord Stanley’s Cup. No hot pitching team of workers can deal more than one 1-zero pitching duels en direction to a Global series identify.

Even the Outstanding Bowl and its one-recreation nature can deliver Tom Brady a platform for an outstanding comeback. should he do that three more times? (Good enough. Perhaps he may want to.)

The NBA playoffs, and in the long run, the NBA Finals are a sixteen-victory take a look at of the first-rate crew. And it by no means fails.

So the warriors’ report-setting, seventy three-victory normal seasons didn’t produce an identity and they were the higher crew than the Cavaliers? Maybe with Draymond Green. But he was given suspended for kicking LeBron James, who, because of the first-rate player on the planet, led the exceptional group over the Green-less Warriors.

Tom Thibodeau served as Jeff Van Gundy’s assistant when the 1998-99 Knicks advanced to the NBA Finals from the No. eight seed. They lost to the Spurs to cap the shortened lockout season.

Can Curiosity Make Your Child A Better Learner

In relation to venturing into the uncharted waters, children fare ways better than adults. As a discern, teacher, father or mother, or any other caregiver, the question that we ought to all try to settle isn’t always whether or not or no longer our kids could be adventurous, however as a substitute whether their curiosity gets the higher of them. As we may all be aware, there is no better manner to assist your infant in examining other than make her or him explore her very own little country to the fullest.

Truest shoes

The truest educator of every toddler isn’t always the information we attempt to pressure into their heads, even if they’re least disposed to take it. The truest educator is enjoying, and there is no better manner to assist our youngster’s leverage to enjoy, than letting them wander to something places their wild dreams take them.truest in a sentence

It is all people’s delight to look, kids, discover their complete capacity

And begin achieving their desires at a soft age. How encouraging is it to realize that our kids ought to discover their personal paths for fulfillment, and live the whole course, handiest with the aid of supporting them in managing their curiosity! What amount of pleasure could this deliver to the society at large? That our personal kids, the cream of the subsequent technology, can already face seemingly insurmountable obstacles in life! What’s even more exciting is the fact that we can assist them to take a fee of their destiny, merely via assisting them to harness their wild curiosity as a studying device. You are probably surprised of what your youngsters can pick up at any such tender age. For all its well worth, it is best logical that we help our youngsters to study by means of making them pursue whatever catches their fancy. curiosity will for all time be part of them, the only question is how we use it for his or her betterment.

It’s miles essential to remind younger people that peace is the best victory.

Peace is a small phrase, it has, however, a deeper which means attached to it. Some humans think of peace as in reality the shortage of disputes, wars, or disagreements. Nicely, that is one of the viewpoints on its that means, and understandably, extraordinary people would have special interpretations of the phrase. however, the knowledge of peace brings a that means to the word that every individual knows, and applies that precise mindset to their lifestyles.

Champions Online Travel Power Guide

Champions Online does not consist of mounts like many other MMOs, it does but encompasses a big variety of travel powers, allowing you to get around in a way becoming in your hero. Nearly any concept may have the perfect journey energy, and Cryptic has been adding new skins for tour powers each once in a while, permitting for greater precise concepts to have a better matching way to get round.champion sports clothing

This article will most effective be discussing the travel powers themselves and now not the Advantages that may be accessed for some of them through spending Gain Factors.champion sweatpants for men

At level five you may pick your first tour strength, with a second being to be had at level 35. With regards to getting around the numerous zones in CO, having a way to tour thru the air is a great deal greater convenient than being caught on the floor. Because you can get 2 tour powers I’d recommend as a minimum one that helps you to tour through the air, even though it does not healthy your person’s concept. It’s now not necessary to accomplish that, but it’ll make it less difficult to tour through certain areas, especially in case you’re surprising with the various zones.

Except for Teleportation and Tunneling,

All four powers have multiple levels resulting in various speeds. In combat or without charging is the slowest and steadily constructing as much as the third and fastest stage, which can be accessed via completely charging the journey electricity. Jet Boots are the exception to this because it uses three stages but can’t be charged.

All journey powers which have a graphical effect to them can be colored to a point by gold members. Silver individuals are stuck with the default appearance.

Flight/Fire Flight/Rainbow Flight – Probable the most iconic splendid hero manner to travel as many classic comedian characters can fly and is a smooth manner of seeing someone who has top notch human talents. In CO flight gives superb maneuverability and slight velocity. Flight has no actual great photo, however many varieties of wings will flap or go with the flow at the same time as flying.

Heart Flight is the exact equal as flight, besides your man or woman is on Fire.

Rainbow Flight is an exact copy of flight, besides your man or woman leaves a rainbow trail even as flying and has a multicolor glow at their feet.

Six Principles and Standards of Conduct Chosen by the American Journal of Occupational Therapy

There are six core principles and standards of conduct hooked up with the aid of the Yankee Journal of Occupational Remedy. Those points are enforceable for professionals running within the field. These ideas are useful in comparing times whilst a certified professional has been accused of beside the point moves and are intended to manual therapists closer to ethical picks. when unusual circumstances and decisions stand up, it’s miles useful to have a set of idealized ideas as a manual.

Beneficence

Folks who offer occupational Remedy want to have subject for the nicely-being in their sufferers. “Beneficence” is a fancy phrase used specifically when discussing ethics, and it calls into query whether participants advantage from a specific examine or manner. Custom treatments may be designed for sufferers every time possible, however it is also crucial for a therapist to periodically compare whether or not a particular course of remedy is reaping benefits the recipient.

Nonmaleficence

Maleficence is an evil or harmful act, the other of beneficence. Nonmaleficence, logically, is refraining from inflicting harm. One of the maximum parts of the Hippocratic oath sworn by way of physicians, nonmaleficence is a reminder to be cautious while harm is feasible. In particular when assisting people recover from beyond accidents, a negative choice of exercising activities can exacerbate the hassle. While there are surely a number of sadistic people within the international, this precept is mostly focused at professionals who may additionally accidentally purpose damage.

Autonomy

Managing an individual’s right to independence, the precept of autonomy ensures that every patient has a proper to privateness, self-determination, consent, and confidentiality. At the same time as extraordinarily personal troubles might not regularly be mentioned during occupational Remedy, it’s miles still critical to admire a affected person’s privateness.aadvantage

Justice

Objectivity and fairness are hallmarks of justice because it pertains to this professional field. humans deserve to be dealt with similarly, regardless of their race, ideals, orientation, or financial approach. Those without the important price range can be directed to charitable businesses and different options for suitable treatment.

Veracity

It’s essential that professionals hold a level of respectability and candor that displays positively on others within the subject. Incorrect information and deception can be dangerous to sufferers and the standing of other therapists. Veracity is especially precious while discussing certifications, qualifications, and experience. Plagiarism and failing to provide right credit score is also a violation of this moral widespread.american airlines confirmation information

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webpostingpro-blog · 8 years ago

Text

New Post has been published on Webpostingpro

New Post has been published on https://webpostingpro.com/nba-playoffs-truest-test-of-champions-in-major-north-american-sports/

NBA playoffs truest test of champions in major North American sports

BRreaking information: The Bulls may not win the NBA championship.

And this lack of upsets is a superb thing.

Think Villanova may want to shoot seventy eight.6 percent three more instances? Over the path of a seven-game collection, “ball don’t lie.” And the fine crew wins.

Even the Outstanding Bowl and its one-recreation nature can deliver Tom Brady a platform for an outstanding comeback. should he do that three more times? (Good enough. Perhaps he may want to.)

The NBA playoffs, and in the long run, the NBA Finals are a sixteen-victory take a look at of the first-rate crew. And it by no means fails.

Tom Thibodeau served as Jeff Van Gundy’s assistant when the 1998-99 Knicks advanced to the NBA Finals from the No. eight seed. They lost to the Spurs to cap the shortened lockout season.

Can Curiosity Make Your Child A Better Learner

Truest shoes

It is all people’s delight to look, kids, discover their complete capacity

It’s miles essential to remind younger people that peace is the best victory.

Champions Online Travel Power Guide

This article will most effective be discussing the travel powers themselves and now not the Advantages that may be accessed for some of them through spending Gain Factors.champion sweatpants for men

Except for Teleportation and Tunneling,

All journey powers which have a graphical effect to them can be colored to a point by gold members. Silver individuals are stuck with the default appearance.

Heart Flight is the exact equal as flight, besides your man or woman is on Fire.

Rainbow Flight is an exact copy of flight, besides your man or woman leaves a rainbow trail even as flying and has a multicolor glow at their feet.

Six Principles and Standards of Conduct Chosen by the American Journal of Occupational Therapy

Beneficence

Nonmaleficence

Autonomy

Justice

Veracity

0 notes